#also like. this also happens to be a critique of mine with the later seasons of the show as well

[dennisboobs]

oh yeah, i love the always sunny book! my favourite parts are the insane cringe-inducing mischaracterization present in every single one of the "audio transcription" sections, the prioritization of shocking, edgy, gross-out humour over actual funny jokes... and you know, i gotta give props to the admirable work of reducing characters to one singular bit, especially charlie's cheese thing, which, while funny in small doses, is absolutely HYSTERICAL when talked about nonstop over several hundred pages. also love the implication that charlie regularly disposes of corpses for the gang. and the addition of slurs in a book that came out in 2015, long after the show dropped their usage, is also really cool.

but at least dennis

[ulquichaan]

Miraculous Ladybug - my thoughts.

Hello!

It's been a while, I know. But I come back to rant yet again! I'm sorry for any mistakes in advance - its 2am and the thoughts won't let me sleep so I have to get them out there somewhere. If you don't want to waste your time - skip it. If you actually want to read it, I'll have a cookie waiting for you at the end of this. :3

My journey with MLB.

Miraculous was that one show that I got to know about through a parody of it on polish yt channel called Surreactor. I didn't know what it was about but it looked interesting and that was a point in time when season 3 was just starting to come out. Sooo, as the curious child I was - I gave it a go. And it captured me very easily.

At first all I wanted is for Adrien and Mari to finally get together. I never had big thoughts about it. Then I got bored between new episodes and just... forgot about it.

After some time however I came back to it. It was somewhere around 4th season airing. I returned to it, watched it all over again and it captured me yet again. I completely fell in love with Adrien as character and started to read loads of fanfiction about the two main heroes. I got invested, started to draw the characters in different settings and what not. I started even posting here on tumblr the rants that blew out about Adrien and about Black Cat holders as a whole just because I was frustrated on how little love he got or that I couldn't find any theories that would make sense.

I made new friend, started to plan stories more than I did before, returned to RP with my old friend through messenger and more.

It was a blow of creativity of mine at that time. You maybe you know of "Sky Is The Limit"? That was the point for me where I had so many ideas that I had to do something with at least one of them. Talking about an overload, right?

Season 4 finale - the best finale in this show in my honest opinion. Though I am based so who cares.

The point is - I deeply fell in love with this fandom for the most part.

And then... season 5 happened.

At first I was hooked. Really. I felt that it was going in the right direction and I even wanted to watch it later so I could see it in order.

Oh boy, did I get disappointed. Very disappointed.

I was never a Senti-Adrien fan, let's be real. But the execution? Even worse.

The finale? The fight yea, fun. But why cut out Adrien out of it???

Chloe as mayor? ARE YOU FOR FUCKING REAL? It's losing braincells more and more.

And I know the plot armor was always evident in this show and all.... but i feel like it was knocked up 10 times or more in season 5 to the point it could beat Game of Thrones seasons 7 and 8. (Yeah, I know what should compare two shows where one is fenomenal and the other has always been trash, but you can't argue with me that seasons 7 and 8 weren't rushed and had very poor execution)

To say that I was angry is an understatement. I HATED season 5 with every fiber of my existence. I still do, but I'm far more calm about it than I was originally. Believe it or not.

I saw all the drama in the fandom. When people complained about the show and other people came in to defend it. And I have to say - I can see where both sides are coming from.

To the people who enjoy it, all of it - I'm glad you do! I really am!

However.

I can clearly see where the hate is coming from and anytime I saw a valid critique I couldn't help but agree with it. There were some awesome responses to that critique even from people who do enjoy the show still, but there were always people who I'll call "white knights".

Aka people who will ride-or-die for the show and always say there is nothing wrong with it!

Oh how I hate this way of thinking....

Little message to those white knights - yes there are pure haters that hate just to hate, but in the spectrum of people who are critiquing the show are also people who loved it and got disappointed. When people are angry/dissapointed they usually feel the need to express themselves and forums like Reddit, Tumblr, Twitter, are just perfect for ranting. I have spent fair share in the horse gaming community to know that every flop will have a retaliation and shutting up people will make them only more angry. :|

I stopped liking the show. Why am I coming back to it?

That's a question that started to bother me just as I was going to sleep.

I have watched Hazbin Hotel (Lucifer my beloved) and fell deeply in love with it. I always liked Vivzie's Hellaverse being it Helluva Boss and now Hazbin, but there is something that just came back to me.

I started yet again imagining Adrien and Marinette but in the helllaverse. Or what if I merged hellaverse and Miraculous together in some way. Or other crazy ideas that will never see the light of day.

It's always those two characters for the most part. But the moment those two show up, the rest of Miraculous cast does too.

I fell put of the show. I don't like it. Why do I keep coming back?

My thought is - the fandom and the work it did for the characters.

I have always loved to read fanfiction even it came to miraculous. And it's always SO MANY! With many different variants of the world or entirely different settings. Ofc there are some bad fics, but the good ones are those that captured my heart and made me love the characters even more.

Let's put in some examples (and recommendations if you want to check them out):

Happiness by Somewhere_Out_Here

Once a Thief, always a Thief by @saijspellhart

Bakery Enemies by @buggachat

Heaven in hiding by @livinglittlelie

I'll guess your heart, if you guess mine by PurpleHeartsOne

Chat Blanc's Moon Waltz by @rileyclaw

The comic dubs by PhantomSavage

The little comics like "Passionate Kiss" by @edendaphne

All of these are just very few examples from multitude of content I devoured when I was in the love stage for MLB. And those things are STILL SO GOOD. (You have to check it out if you haven't already)

The point is - the fandom fell in love with the concept and if not that, then the characters. Yes, they aren't perfect. Some would say they are very much Mary Sue-ish. Some would say they are badly written. While the fact is - the characters themselves aren't badly written, the plot is just badly handled.

I can see why people love Marinette, she is quirky, funny and her ideas, while absurd most of the time, they work. And that's fine! She is supposed to be creative and what not. A great friend to have in corner, that for sure :3

Adrien on the other hand is supposed to be a bundle of issues that come with living a sheltered life and the want to be free.

(The movie handled Marinette much better than the show, let's be real here)

Sad fact - the writers of the show couldn't handle all of the potential they set up. But the fandom could and that's what's beautiful in my opinion.

The show may not be a masterpiece but they made some aspects of it so enjoyable and investing (love-square) that other people decided to execute those good things in their own stories and create something else.

The characters are just so easy to put into other stories too. Because they are written in the way they are (even if poorly handled at times) the aspects of them are very flexible, which in turn makes them easy to incorporate into other AUs.

For me it proves that you don't need a very complicated and deep character to make your story memorable. Even tho that certainly helps depending on your story. Miraculous was really lucky it got that creative fandom in the first place.

And this is what is beautiful.

Ending, some plans of mine that who knows if they will see the light of day. :]

This is only for those who are interested what I have been up to and what do i plan with this blog:

I am not quitting tumblr, oh no. I'll be probably reposting some stuff that I like from time to time.

I am returning to write "Sky Is The Limit", however I am completely rewriting it for the.... 7th time? Something like that. I doubt I'll finish it anytime soon at this rate and if I get the need to draw I might draw few characters from there or designs I have planned.

I have a very big project in mind that I might probably make a new blog for. It's still just an idea but I getting closer to actually being made so stay tuned.

I will start posting stuff from Hazbin Hotel. I fell deeply in love with Lucifer's character and you can't unglue me from that duck man!!

Other than that I went to university and I'm enjoying my time here so yeah.

And here is your cookie for reading all that! You're a legend!

(I'm open for any discussions as long as they stay respectful. Feel free to DM me :>)

[dabidagoose]

which one do YOU think is the worst. i already voted but i’m curious

I would like to start off by apologizing for how long this has taken me. I truly don't know what happened, but now that, months later, I'm back in image analysis brainspace we're gonna do our best to analyze all these images and answer this question. For reference, this ask is referring to this post of mine.

I'm gonna start with my favorite, which is this fantasy high poster. The title is really readable, large, and noticeable - which is great for advertising and for viewers to find the show. I appreciate how Brennan is leaning over the PCs, it's a cute pose and very much conveys that "I'm the DM" energy. I don't love how squished together all the PCs are, but the yellow light scribbles are a nice visual metaphor for a fictional world, and it's nice to see all the PCs in the promotion.

My second favorite is Tiny Heist. The descending height schtick is really cute, and we also get that fun DM-ergy from having only half of a giant Brennan. He also sort of feels like the one human in a muppet movie, which is a really cute vibe and compels me to watch. However his face is super washed out, the lighting from that photo was way too bright for him. I also really like the green slits, as they are a nice clean visual and the green color theme is pretty nice.

I don't hate D20 live either, but here is where I start getting a lot more nitpicky with the posters. Good things first - that title is really easy to read, and I like how the composition sort of mirrors the first Fantasy High poster. The prominence of Live highlights the unique live show element, which is a nice advertising move.

However, I really hate the entire right half of the poster. Brennan's got a real weird expression on his face - almost looks like he's playing Robert Moses or some sort of shitty businessman, which is not really applicable to this season that's a lot more about fantasy and mythical religion.

They've included all the cool new character art but completely covered it up by Brennan's giant body, and made that worse by surrounding him and Adaine's orb with light that makes it harder to see the art (I can barely see Gorgug's beautiful face...). This is especially frustrating when they have SO much free space on the left, and the totally squished right side.

Now we get to Escape from the Bloodkeep, which (and rightfully so) won the poll. I think from purely a design perspective it is absolutely the worst poster. The title is such a similar color to Brennan's shirt that it's very difficult to read, he's once again covering up a bunch of squished together character art, and there's the giant boring background of nothingness.

However, and I haven't watched Escape from the Bloodkeep so this is a lot of guessing on my part, it does feel like the right tone for the season. The red feels angry and villainous, Brennan feels like the right sort of Evil DM for this evil little world, and the expression is pretty fun. You may have noticed that this is only poster 4 of 5, and so this one is actually not my least favorite, but my second most, and this is why. The poster is pretty unappealing design, but it fits, and it prepares people for the season.

Finally, let's answer your question and say - I really do not like the Unsleeping City poster.

My design critiques follow some of the same design themes as before - Brennan is covering up key characters, the title is partially covered up by Brennan and less prominent than I feel it should be, and Brennan's once again been weirdly washed out. They also pretty obviously edited his shirt to be purple, which takes up so much space.

However, the thing I'm angriest about design-wise is that they have an absolutely GORGEOUS piece of art for the background and lettering for the title that is COVERED BY EVERYTHING ELSE! The colors used are incredible (the character art is great on its own but does not match), the stars and rendering are beautiful (which we can see some of but not what's below), and you can't see the upside down city! For a season called the Unsleeping City! Why can't we see the City!!!

I also personally feel like the vibe from all the characters and Brennan don't feel quite right for this season. All their poses feel very goofy comedy (a la Tiny Heist), but to me this season felt a lot darker and more human, especially compared to the earlier more comedic seasons. There was of course plenty of comedy this season, but I felt like some of those most notable things about it were all the mystical magic and tense human moments, which do not come across in this poster. I may be misremembering the season, but it just doesn't seem like it fits to me.

Tl;dr Unsleeping city is my least favorite even though Escape from the Bloodkeep is probably a worse design - because they covered up some cool art and it doesn't feel like it fits the season. An addendum: I have procrastinated this for so long for no good reason. I tried to start this a long long time ago and had no such luck. I really enjoyed writing all this and don't want to just delete it, so I'll leave my half finished bullshit under the cut. It's mostly just a lot of self-indulgent attempts at analysis. Read it if you want, this is mostly here for me.

Ok ok. First off apologies for how long this has taken to post I was inflicted by the horrors (first finals and then just some regular old mental blocks). But oh BOY do I have opinions on this !!!!! Buckle in everyone cause I'm gonna make this post MUCH longer than it needs to be!

So firstly this ask is referring to this post of mine, in which I critique some old dimension 20 promotional posters, and do a poll for which one is the worst. Escape from the Bloodkeep won, which is incredibly fair it's absolutely horrible and second worst in my opinion, however I do not think it's the worst. I've decided to drag this out as long as possible,

Chapter 1: What makes a promo image good?

I know I just decided to split this post up with Chapter titles but we're gonna also split up this section, since I think there's two separate parts of what makes a promo image good - delineated by the two words 'promo' and 'image'.

For the 'promo' part to be good the season needs to be accurately advertised. We need to be able to get the vibe of the season, to feel the kind of energy and appeal it's going to have, and we want to highlight some of the important parts of it. Take the Ravening War promo picture - it's dark and moody and dramatic. Then we've got Matt front and center, of course since he's the DM but also since his presence is a huge marketing point - he's even allowed to cover up the title! The newest DnDrag poster is also (I assume, since it's not out yet) pretty good at this. It's full of bright pink and strong colors and their poses really get across that fab drag aesthetic. They've also put the drag queens ahead of Brennan, since their presence is the big selling point of the season, and highlighted the fun play-on-words title.

Next, for the 'image' part to be good, it should look visually appealing. There should be a nice layout and composition - things that are more relevant should be made prominent and put center or at one of the thirds, and elements should work well together. Also, if there is text, the colors should be chosen so that it is readable, especially important text. The Seven is my favorite example of this. They've got all the silhouettes nicely laid out to form that curve shape.There's some extra free space around the edges which are less important, while the center has the larger characters and the title so that it's more filled in. All the silhouettes have distinct shapes which makes it easy to tell who is who and pull apart the elements. The text is INCREDIBLY easy to read, with the bright pink outline on Seven creating the color contrast that it's important for readability (I'm a bit of a nerd about color contrast and the WCAG guidelines), and that combined with the huge font really highlights that word and its prominence. The weapon through Seven provides a nice thematic touch, and adds to that visual prominence.

Chapter 2: The Uncanny

[ladedanixie]

What are your thoughts on the new episode on helluva boss? The one with Mammon.

Hiya, thanks for the ask lovely anon. Love any excuse to talk about things I love. Also, sorry it took so long to get to this, its been a long week.

I'll put what I thought under the cut, cause I always get really wordy. What can I say, I got opinions.

Overall, I think it was a fantastic episode. Definitely more evidence, imo, that most of the better episodes in the show are usually ones with Vivzie as the main writer.

There is more to say about it. It's not perfect and while I do think its one of the best episodes of season 2, I think my favorite is still Oops. But episode seven is full of bops, and def trumps Oops in that regard. Don't get me wrong, "Look at This" is a great song.

My main critiques (or more like nitpicks) of the episode though lie mostly with Blitz's involvement and, this is more of something I have a show long issue with rather than just this episode, but the swiftness with which things are resolved. Also I have some issue Fizz continuing to do the clown contest was because he was scared of losing Ozzie.

I don't have much umbrage with Blitz being there. I mean I enjoy him and I like seeing his interactions with both Ozzie and Fizz. But, he didn't serve much more purpose other than as a sounding board for Fizz. Which ok, it works for the narrative, but its not super necessary to the episode. The flashback is great though and I adore seeing teen Blitz and Fizz.

I think if they really wanted Blitz there, there coulda been a bit more screen time attributed to them talking about the stalker. Maybe mentioning how bad that was in the past before the accident. And mention what it was like after. Cause aside from Ozzie, Fizz doesn't appear to have any other friends. But, we don't have the whole story yet. Of the in between of becoming Mammon's brand figure and meeting Ozzie. Or if that happened at the same time. Then again the Mammon episode is the longest episode thus far, and idk how much more runtime they could have spent to make any of that happen. Moreover, usually these things get revealed later on. I chalk things like that up to the understandable release schedule and the mostly episodic nature of the show.

I will mention another way to make Blitz a little more relevant, cause I did think this on my first watch, and I brought up it to a friend of mine, is have a small scene where he calls Ozzie. Like in the scene where Fizz runs to his dressing room and leaves Blitz, just linger on Blitz long enough to pull out his phone and make a call. Though, idk if that'd break the flow. Tbh in the end the Blitz thing is a nitpick and not a horrible thing. I like him there. I enjoy him supporting Fizz. I just think he wasn't super necessary. Especially since we don't see any growing pains of him and Fizz rebuilding their friendship.

As for why I take issue with the FizzOzzie thing. Let me clarify and say, I don't hate FizzOzzie. I love them in fact. Secondly, I don't think the reason is bad or needs to be cut. What I am saying is that on re-watches, I thought that that can't be the only reason for why Fizz stayed with Mammon. His feelings of inadequacy, of needing to be good enough began way before he met Ozzie. Yes I can see that feeding into him not feeling good enough for Ozzie as a result. But him admitting it because he would lose Ozzie feels idk I wish there was more build up to that aside from from sad faces in Oops.

Again Helluva Boss is great at hinting at things and setting things up via what we think are thrown away jokes. But it also is sometimes bad at giving certain ideas time to build up. (Like Unhappy Campers. The one hint we got for that was in Seeing Stars with Millie getting annoyed with Moxxie. ) Usually they are introduced in one episode and resolved in the same episode. Like Oops, and Blitz and Fizz made up so fast. At the time I argued it'd take time for them to get back to friendship, that it wasn't just resolved, there was more time to see that nuaced build back up to friendship, but the Mammon special happened and that didn't seem to happen. Again, I can chock that up to release schedule and episodic nature. And I admit Blitz and Fizz's friendship wasn't the focus of that episode. Opps was. But, that shouldn't be one episode. Ultimately I wish we had more insight or time or build up to why Fizz felt so inadequate. Cause it was clearly an issue since he was a teen. Either way, maybe my point might be moot later. But, I reserve the right to feel that way.

In the end, I loved the episode. Thought it was the funniest episode to date. Thought it had some of the best music to date. And had a lot of fun, cute, and thoughtful moments. It had great character development for Fizz. And I am now a huge Fizz fan. I liked him before. I love him now thanks to Oops and Mammon's special.

[viserya-firstofhername]

The unsung heroes of HOTD • prologue

So here is the thing.

I was planning to make this a singular post, but at this point I am at I don't even know how many names but surely above at least five dozen, so I shall instead jump into my nerd shoes, and shall make of it a series.

The premise is as follows: The writing room of HOTD this season to a large extent failed a rich and marvelous piece of modern media and especially so, the incredibly gifted teams who worked on its production. It saddens me deeply how we only focus on the bad, while we fail to reflect on the enormous amount of talent and hard work so many people put into it. It happened in 2019. It will be happening again.

So what are we to do about it? Whine, dine, overanalyze, scream, cry, laugh, eat cake, repeat the same three curses until D&D reincarnated show up in our mirror?

Yap Condal this, yap Hess that? Condemn Martin for the next damned ungodly reason? Some folk may chose to slander and throw vitriol at the writing team and while I might indeed in the future yap along mine own hopefully constructive criticism (because some is positively and absofuckinglutely in place), I respectfully disagree with this approach of consuming media; yap about the bad, overlook the intensely good.

I should also state that I am sometimes that person to critique the let-people-enjoy-things movement for their certain lack of media literacy, but tis a lack that is often visible in the hotd critical tag as well.

To that statement, I should add, I refuse to become an apologist for Hess or Condal (the latter - let us all for a moment remember and admit - was one of the last saving graces of the rubbish inferno that was GOT's last couple of seasons and if you disagree - here be your invitation to enter a discourse with me). I might in due time issue a detailed post in a mock Shakespearian lingo mixed with High Valyrian & rap rhymes, but the point of this post is:

I should much more delight in praising the talented people who 1000% broke their backs and their hard labor is very clearly visible, because such is the topic I prefer mine own time be invested in.

We all agree across the board (right?) the actors are phenomenal. More than, even. I would love to touch on that as well but it shall be later on. I am much more interested in discussing the production value, because I'm here for this medium with all senses. Thus, I plan to focus on the production teams in this small nerdy series, sharing thoughts hopes griefs and all, as a way to fill the void in my heart until we get episodes 2x09 and 2x10 (my humorous brief on that: here).

For chapter i, we shall be focusing on the casting department, led by one Kate Rhodes James, for she is pure professional peak, more so than Nina Gold, dare I say, and everything she and her team have done for HOTD is purely and utterly ethereal, otherworldly, three-eyed-ravenesque, phenomenal.

When shall this post be posted will be decided by mine own nerdy brain and whether or not it decides to pen a 6000 words essay on a topic I know next to nothing of (surely, I could delve into research and this might be a source of delay, I suppose you see the potential for issues there).

-

TLDR version: I just want to spell the names of the folks that showed up to work and did fucking brilliant, and marvel at a their masterful craftsmanship.

Disclaimer 1: I cannot stress the following enough: I do not lend my support to anyone who would cast shade and hate or outright criticize the opinions of others simply because they diverge from their own. If thou dost desire to experience the show by critiquing the writers, then by all means - you do you, i do me, and we shall be in courteous and merry accord to agree to disagree.

Disclaimer 2: I know just about nothing of producing cinema and tv. I have one (1) friend who works in the industry. Come at me with professional opinions - very very welcome.

If thou would like to follow this endeavor, thou can keep an eye on the #the unsung heroes of hotd tag, no need to follow my daily fulminations.

I've done and made my peace.

[irkimatsu]

Caught up on Hazbin Hotel! It's a fun ride! I don't have nearly enough words for it - there's someone in my circle way, way better at that when it comes to this - but I did want to ramble a little bit:

-Charlie. CHARLIE. I am about 60% here for Charlie. You could have told me nothing about this show besides "the Princess of Hell is basically a shoujo protagonist" and you would have gotten me from there. Is my love for Charlie proof of my namby-pamby hippie ways of love and kindness and forgiveness? Probably! But it's fine. I love Charlie. I want to know her dreams of redemption are possible. (Sometimes I really need to know that you really can be redeemed no matter how badly you've fucked up...)

-I'm also really loving Husk. How much is the personality and how much is the character design? No clue. (I'm a furry, baby~) He's a good straight man, though, and someone that most of this hotel's residents are gonna need, especially Angel. Glad I'm not the only one on the Husk/Angel train, looking forward to where that's going

-Sir Pentious is a pathetic baby man and I love pathetic baby men. (My main fandom is still an anime about six pathetic baby men, after all.) While there's other characters I care more about as a whole, I fully expect to be laughing my shit off every time this guy's on screen. Idiot. <3

-God damn the music is good, just as I expected after years of Helluva Boss. Standouts so far are "Poison" (obviously, even though that scene fucking hurt to watch - which isn't a complaint, it did what it was supposed to); "Stayed Gone" (Vox is such a petty bitch and damn do I see why a friend of mine favors Alastor, he's effective as hell); and "Loser Baby" (maybe because I literally just watched it and boarded the Husk/Angel train, but hey, it was fun, and a desperately needed cleanser after "Poison". You know "Poison" was rough when a cheerful song about how much your lives suck is a cleanser.) There hasn't been a dud yet, though! Gonna have to loop the soundtrack to commit everything to memory, though that might wait until the whole season's out. Don't want to not give later songs a fair shake because I was too busy looping the earlier ones.

-If I have to complain a little, I do admit to being lost on some things, and I don't know how much of that is "I'm supposed to be lost, they'll explain later", "I'm dumb and didn't absorb things properly", or "that was explained in side materials". I hope most of it is those first two and not the third - side materials are fun, but I do think the show should be able to stand on its own. Even with the pilot - is that on Amazon? I don't know because I watched the show, um, elsewhere. I have my doubts about it, though, since so much changed between the pilot and the main show, as it tends to happen with pilots. If it's not, that does feel like a bit of a problem, since I think this show has its best chance of success if someone sees it turns up in their recommended section, knows nothing about it but thinks it looks cool, and tunes in there. Treats for the dedicated fans are great, but continuity lockout makes it hard for newbies to care, and I'd rather this didn't turn into "well you're not a real fan because you didn't read all the side comics and blog posts". No elitism, please! Let people who don't live on the Internet enjoy the funny demon show, too!

-Twitter is annoying and my engagement with this show in public will probably be slim-to-zero because this show's hatedom is one of the most obnoxious I've seen in a long time. It's fine to hate the show, obviously, but god, all the reaching for straws to prove that everyone who watches this show is evil and supports all the crime in the world. It's okay, you don't have to like the violent Hell show where people say fuck. It's not for everyone. You don't need to prove you're better than everyone else for not liking it. It's fine, love, it's fine. Of course there's stuff to criticize, every show can be critiqued, but "it's gross for Niffty to make sex jokes because she's tiny"? Go away with that shit.

I hope at least some of this was coherent. Looking forward to more!

[jimmycarterghostland]

The Lorien Legacies series is awful

Firstly, I have to mention that Ella plot twist.

In the Lorien Legacies, Ella is revealed to not be a Number. It happens in The Fall of Five book. Yet in The Power of Six, Henri's letters says there was a Ten. The writers clearly forgot that. They forgot a lot of things.

Ella being a fake Number didn't even add anything interesting to the book series. It was such a forced plot twist that didn't matter, other than make Ella sad for a couple pages.

I desperately wish The Snark Theater could critique the Lorien Legacies books. I loved his posts about The Maze Runner books and why they were bad. He was hilarious, informative, and gave some great writing tips. The LL series is a gold mine for anyone interested in going into detail about bad books. There needs to be a Cinema Sins for books.

I was a former LL fan, but I got older, got better at writing and recognizing bad writing, and have read better books, so now the LL books don't intrigue me anymore. Especially now that I became a fan of the ASOIAF series. George RR Martin is a much better writer than the ghost writers who cooked up the LL series drivel.

ASOIAF has amazing character continuity, no out of character moments, little continuity errors(whereas the LL series has dozens of those), better writing in general, proper foreshadowing, etc. George RR Martin's works help me with my own writing. I'm a better writer because of him, and much of his stuff has inspired some things found in my current writing project.

Is there anyone out there who used to love the LL series but fell out of love with it? Anyone who recognizes how bad those books are? When I was younger and dumber, those books were everything to me. Now I wish they had been genuinely good.

The LL books jumped the shark in The Fall of Five. It's popularity was as its peak in The Rise of Nine, but by TFOF is when it started to get Game of Thones's later seasons bad. In retrospect, these books were always bad, but they were genuinely terrible starting from The Revenge of Seven and onwards.

The Fall of Five is when the books started noticably making no sense. Adam saw a blonde Garde girl as one of the nine Garde in his first novella, The Fallen Legacies. Then Five was revealed to be a brown-haired guy in TFOF. This is the moment when the series truly jumped the shark. It made no sense that Five was a girl, and it broke immersion badly.

That same book reveals that Ella wasn't a Number. Yet Henri said there was a Ten in his letter. WTF, right?

A big reason why the LL books are bad is the number of continuity errors. This is probably the worst aspect of the books. With such an extreme amount of errors, the reader's immersion is broken and they can't trust the books to tell a story that makes sense. A writer should never write a plot twist if it doesn't make sense. Five was revealed to be a boy, yet Adam saw a blonde girl who wasn't One in The Fallen Legacies. This is why readers expected Five to be a girl. Also, they remembered Sofia Garcia, who saved a man during an earthquake. She was mentioned in the first book.

In The Power of Six, Marina mentioned a supposed Garde in Bangladesh. This couldn't have been Eight, because he spent his days in India. It wasn't the other Garde either. And in The Fallen Legacies, Adam mentions a Mogadorian who got killed when he tried to kill one of the Garde children. The charm killed him. It was never revealed who this Garde was.

Ella saw a painting of Five in The Rise of Nine, throwing something at Mogs while being in a tree. This plot point went nowhere.

The LL books were such a mess. Clues went nowhere, and sometimes there were no clues or hints when there needed to be clues and hints. It was horrible.

Not only did the Ella being a fake Number not make sense, but it destroyed the amazing thrill I got while reading The Power of Six and liking how Ella met Elder Loridas when she was a baby. And how he sacrificed himself for her. Well, the writers ruined this by making all of that into a bullcrap lie. Ella never met Loridas. I was furious.

In one of the later books, Six and Marina refuse to torture or kill an evil Mogadorian named Phiri. Such a terrible out of character moment.

I wish George RR Martin had written these books. I would've absolutely loved to see that. The LL books are so bad. They're poorly written. And it becomes noticeable when you know what bad writing looks like. The I Am Number Four movie was bad, but so were these books.

[d0d0-b0i]

(SPOILER FILLED) alrighty, time for some more cohesive thoughts on prime for me (since my last one was written directly after finishing it and now its had time to sit in my brain) (long post btw, i ramble @w@)

overall, i very much enjoyed it! the animation had me positively salivating over the fact that its /actually/ using animation techniques and not just. moving characters from A to B without the time for proper stylization. the overall plot was enjoyable and i am excited to see what the rest of the season will offer.

the fact that it is only one-third of the whole season also makes me a lot more forgiving about certain flaws i found at first, like only showing three worlds and not giving the characters a lot of time to breathe. theres the very high likelihood that such a thing actually will happen, and we might even see more places and worlds, which is an exciting thought! nonetheless, going in i did not know this as i was sleep deprived and had forgotten how many episodes the season has, so i felt a little bit salty, ngl.

Devon Mack does a very good job as sonic, and it makes me feel warm inside hearing his portrayal! every actor does a great job honestly, and it truly feels like they all understand the respective character they voice act(especially considering they have to acclimate the character /and/ voice for each new world. very talented!). the eggman voice actor could use some rerecords at times honestly;; but he does a good enough job that i only notice it sometimes; and he is fun to listen to regardless, and is just a subjective thought of mine.

the different universes also intrigue me! :D i really enjoyed the first one the jungle one was interesting and had beautiful flora models, but it is with this one that a problem of mine arises (but ill get to that later). the waterworld was also interesting, but kind of boring worldwise, since its just. water. (i get that its a pirate world and thats fine! i just cant give a good description of my feelings besides just. water. yknow?)

ive seen that a lot of people think rouge shouldve been the captain in the third world and. honestly. yeah. i think we might get to see why later on? but idk. i hope they have a reason that makes sense as to why she isnt, like if the worlds stick around and dont fuse back, shed be the next captain? weh! (i do love knuckles in a captains outfit though, so bonus points for that!)

now. i only have a few “criticisms”, and although some can be attributed to not being intended for me(and i will therefore not include cus. duh), there is one thing i just cannot let slip by.

(CRITIQUE START) the issue i have is that it feels so empty. new yolk (i refuse the yoke) is populated, but later episodes only really reuse the same five models roughly multiple times and i think had at most like 30? of them at the same time, and obviously could not have had more due to budget and such (which is understandable, but that still doesnt mean i cant point it out).

the jungle episodes! THE JUNGLE EPISODES?? ONLY HAD 5?? CHARACTERS MINUS SONIC (froggy counts) AT ALL TIMES?? and even the flashbacks only show those, probably so as not to imply death but like. come on. not even a few background characters at all? am i meant to believe they will all die out anyway simply by being the last people on this earth? im sorry i just cant get over this. you can make sean mcloughlin, mr jacksepticeye, get a cameo and his own personal character model, BUT CANNOT EVEN FILL A JUNGLE WITH PEOPLE?? did i miss something? if theyd shown even /one/ bg character once in a single frame in the flashbacks, id forgive it but i. cannot. im sorry. im nitpicking but come on! this is like the only issue i have. you only have 11 of the original characters in the first place (sonic. tails. knuckles. amy. rouge. big. froggy. shadow. eggman. orbot. cubot.), and then half of them are pretty much gone most of the time.

i just. its so empty? DO NOT GET ME WRONG I HATE WHEN THAT HAPPENS. I DEEPLY ENJOY THIS SHOW! I LOVE THE CHARACTERS WEVE GOTTEN TO SEE !!! THAT DOES NOT MEAN I CANNOT COMPLAIN ABOUT SOMETHING I HAD TROUBLE PROCESSING. if its gonna be a show about sonic and his friendships. where the fuck are the rest of them? is all we’re gonna get homages to their characters? (jungle knuckles was just sticks. come on now. just put her in shes already canon to the mainline games now) sega, if youre going to make a show about his friendships, why wont you let his friends be there? why can you only license 11 of your characters to the show? please make me eat my words.

and yeah you could say that the reasons others arent there (in-canon, not because of legal issues) is because they werent hit close-up with the prism shatter, but neither was big? he was shown to be down by the hills when it exploded, and i dont know if that counts considering that orbot and cubot arent even in any episode besides the first one, and they werent visible in the blast, i do not know what the blast radius would be to affect anything else. eugh. idk man. this is like the ONE issue i have, and its so small it feels meaningless. yeah yeah the budget the tight grip on characters yadda yadda i get the reasons behind it but it still affects the endgoal and i should be allowed to point it out.                                                                                                                     (CRITIQUE OVER)

that being said. i am in love with the character designs! especially a big fan of sonics gloves and shoes in the pirate world. i fuck w/ that very much <3

anyway, thats it. show good. binge it if possible! we need netflix to know that we like this. and maybe theyll realize that one episode per week for this show would be perfect (im looking at you episode recaps)

[unmotivatedwrit3r]

Don't Mess With a Wayne

Damian Wayne x reader

college athlete!batfam AU

(A/N): This is inspired by Ari (@prettylittlebrownskingyal )'s Jason hockey AU which you can read here. Mine focuses on Damian, so the two aren't similar and this isn't exactly a series (though i could do other things in this verse in the future possibly) but the hockey thing, I got from her.

Also, I know nothing about hockey and this has merely mentions of the sport.

warnings: minor character injury, mention of injury to others

~

in this AU: Bruce played professionally and was a legend. He attended Gotham U and broke every hockey record in existence. Dick quit when he got to college then graduated with a bachelors and now teaches hockey to kids. Jason made it to pro and then was injured and had to leave, Tim played for MIT and then dropped it, and Damian is on track to go pro as well.

~

It’s later than you hoped it would be when you arrive at Damian’s apartment, and you wrap your arms tighter around yourself to try to stave off the Gotham winter chill. It isn’t even that late in the fall, but the temperatures are dropping quickly at night, and the days are getting shorter.

When you check your watch before knocking on the door, the illuminated screen says it's already nine pm. You feel kind of bad that you’re so late; you got caught up with work at the library. On the plus side, your essay is done and you just need to edit it before you hand it in.

You hear rustling behind the door before it opens inward, and you smile at Damian’s roommate as he opens the door. You like Jon very much; he and Damian have been best friends for years, and when he came into your life, so did Jon by default. He’s wilder and more lighthearted than Damian, plays baseball instead of Damian’s hockey, and is overall one of the sweetest people on the planet. You’ve met his parents —his mom is a world famous journalist and his dad plays professionally for the Metropolis baseball team— and they are some of the most genuine people you’ve ever met. You also know for a fact that Jon eats the weirdest food combinations and is pretty smart under all the funny he displays outright.

“Hey Jon.” You peer to the side of him, into the living room. Usually the TV is on at this hour, and either one or both of them is watching something on it, either their own game plays (whether to critique their own performances or watch each other’s games) or something more along the lines of action TV shows. “Where’s Damian?” Jon’s eyes widen at your question, and his facial expression contorts into one that tells you he knows something that you’re not going to be happy with Damian about.

“Did he not tell you?” he asks, backing into the apartment. You close the door quickly behind you as you follow him, eyes narrowing.

“Tell me what?” Jon retreats, heading towards the kitchen to pull out an ice pack. You’re pretty sure it’s not for him. Baseball season isn't even close to it’s start date, so unless he tripped down the stairs, (which has happened before, but he’s moving fine and there are no bruises on his arms) it’s for Damian, who just became the youngest Captain to date of the Gotham University hockey team a couple weeks ago. You cut off Jon’s path around the kitchen table. “What happened?”

Jon’s eyes don’t meet yours, instead looking at the tiled floor. You spare it a glance. One of his socks has a hole in it. “Jon, tell me. I’m not mad at you.” Jon sighs and hands you the icepack.

“I promised him I wouldn’t tell anyone, and he should probably tell you. He’s in his room.” You nod and thank Jon, dropping your jacket and boots on the couch and the side of the door respectively before throwing your backpack back over your shoulder and grabbing the ice pack, heading to Damian’s room.

The lights are dim when you enter, and the light grey walls look darker then they usually do because of it. The room isn’t pitch black, though, so you can see that the only other person in the room is sitting on his bed, the TV on low volume in front of him.

Damian’s head turns towards you as you enter, and you stand by the light switch, closing the door softly behind you.

“Can I turn on the lights?”

“Sure.”

You push the dimmer switch up to full brightness and gasp when you see his face, rushing across the room to sit on his bed beside him. Damian’s lip is split in two places and a shiner decorates the underside of his right eye; a cut is held together by two butterfly bandages over his left eyebrow. He’s wearing a Gotham Paladins hockey t-shirt, probably one of his dad’s, and you can see a brace wrapped around his right elbow.

“Jeez, Dami, what happened?”

He winces as your thumb brushes over his split lip, your hand cradling his face.

“Couple of the bigger guys thought it would be funny to try and prove that a nineteen year old wasn’t meant to be captain.” He chuckles bitterly. “All they learned is not to mess with a Wayne.”

“You reported them, right?” Damian shrugs.

“I reported the so-called brains behind their plan. The others were just followers. Took a couple cheap shots and then ran when Harris went down.”

You run the name through your head. Harris is a large, mean senior who thought he was on track to lead the team that year, before Damian took the Captain title. He did have a bit of a following of younger players, but more and more had been pulling away since Damian became Captain, and the practices had been running better than ever before.

“What happened?” you ask, handing Damian the ice pack before you stand up to put your backpack by his desk chair, plugging your computer in on the desk. “What did they do to you?”

Damian shrugs. “Grabbed me, tried to force me down.” He lifts the shoulder to the arm with the bandage on the elbow. “It’s sprained.” Damian winces as the cold pack meets the bruise on his face. “I’m sure it was an attempt at intimidation.”

“And?” you ask, hoping for the answer of what he did to them in turn.

“Tt. Didn’t work, obviously.”

You can’t help but huff a laugh. “I know it didn’t. I didn’t think it would. I was just wondering what you did to them.”

Damian laughs. “Harris is in the hospital, if that’s what you were asking about. Black eye, broken wrist, and possibly bruised ribs, I can’t be sure. The rest of them took one good punch each before running. And even if Harris could play the season, there’s talk of expulsion, and he’s off the team.”

You shrug, walking back to the light switch to lower the brightness back to where it was before returning to Damian’s bed to sit beside him. “He deserved it, though. The guy’s an ass.”

Damian smiles at you, and a bloom of warmth shoots through your chest. He doesn't smile often, usually only in front of you or Jon or his family on rare occasions, and you think it’s the most beautiful thing in the world. “He is.”

You tuck Damian’s back against your chest and feel his head come to rest against your shoulder.

“But if you ever withhold information that involves your well-being from me again, you will regret it, you understand?”

You can hear Damian’s smirk in his words, but you both know you're not entirely joking. “Yes, of course, beloved.”

[where-theres-smoak-2]

Here’s the transcript of an interview LB did a couple of weeks ago. Be prepared to be annoyed at her not knowing wtf she’s taking about but pretending she does especially in the Darkling and the decision to make Alina half Shu sections:

https://www.penfaulkner.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/Literature-on-Screen-Shadow-and-Bone-Transcript.pdf

So there were a few bits in this interview that I want to talk about. I am going to shock you here and say there were actually parts of this interview where I agree with what LB says and gave me the tiniest bit of hope. But before you get too worried its the parts where she is talking about season 2 and her involvement in the show and writing process. Here is what she said when asked what her involvement in season 2 is:

With season two, I've been able to be a little bit more involved in casting, costumes, production design, meeting with directors.

Then I think I am going to step back. I'm not going to be as involved in reading the scripts. I think at this point, we are going to be diverging quite a bit more, and it's all I can say. I really cannot say more than that. I'm about to be descended upon by Netflix assassins. For me, there has to be a moment of saying, “This doesn't belong to me anymore.” The books are mine, they will always be on the shelves, and this has its own life now.

She also said something similar a little later in the interview when talking about changes between the books and the show and how she got negative reactions to saying the show was like an expensive fanfiction:

Which to me is like, "Why are you so mad about fanfiction? It's amazing, first of all. Second, all adaptation is fan fiction. That's what it is. All adaptation is fan fiction." To me, this is the way adaptation should work, where you keep the core and you keep the heart, but you're allowed to play. Otherwise, you cannot ask, I think, a group of smart writers, talented directors, amazing actors to simply transcribe. I don't think that's exciting for anyone.

That funny thing about that second statement about tv adaptions basically being fanfiction is I said it myself in a post a while back. It does seem like LB is more open to changes from her book and it also looks like she is not going to be as involved with the writing process for season 2, we also have heard in other interviews that they are going to be diverting away from the books in the next season, whether that is a good or bad thing is yet to be seen but I do think it is a good thing that LB is taking a step back from the show, as she herself said the books are hers and they will always be there so the show should be the show and it should be allowed to have a life of its own. I've said before but I prefer it with tv adaptions if they don't follow the books because to me that's more exciting than if I know exactly what is coming next, I like to be surprised.

Something else I learned from this interview is this:

Eric Heisserer, he is our showrunner on Shadow and Bone season one and in season two he'll be co-show running with Daegan Fryklind who is one of the wonderful writers from season one.

So from a google search I found out that Daegan was the writer for episode 6 and episode 8. Again whether its a good or bad thing that she'll now be co-running the show with Eric I don't know but it is still an interesting bit of information and I'll take any info I can get on season 2.

However whilst I was feeling optimistic about everything LB was saying about season 2 and was actually kind of impressed at how she seemed to have let go a bit and was happier with the idea of changes from the books than she seemed in the past, but she then said this:

Petra: Following on from that, actually, somebody is asking, and I know you've said that the story is going to diverge from the books in future seasons, do you – Let's assume this is a spoiler too but I'm going to ask it anyways, and you can tell me to get lost. Do you want the shows and the books to end in the same place, the same way?

Leigh: Yes I do. [laughs] Yes, I do. Look, I wrote the books the way I wrote them for a reason, and that – I haven't seen any sense that that is going to change at all, but there are certain things that I know if we get to move forward will change because we'll want to see these characters continue in their adventures. Also because there's a finality to some things that happen in the books that then is sort of undone in later books, I'm really being abstruse here, but I guess my point is there are certain things that are essential to me that stay the same and certain things that I don't care. You learn which things and, fortunately, I've been on the same page with the writers from moment one.

Just no, please no, no, no. This I just don't understand ok. LB and the showrunners/writers must be aware of how unpopular the ending of her books were right? I mean I've seen an interview where LB herself says that she was aware that the ending was controversial amongst fans and that many of them were angry at the ending. You could put up a good argument that it was the thing people hated the most about her original trilogy, the ending. So why on earth would she or the showrunners want to keep that ending? Like any part of it? I mean she says there are some things she doesn't care if they are changed and others she thinks are essential they keep and unfortunately I feel like it most likely Alina losing her powers that she wants to keep and that for me was the worst part of the ending. To be honest it kind of makes me really wary about continuing with the show because I don't want to get invested in the show just to be really let down by the ending. Also if that many book readers didn't like the ending what do they think is going to happen when the tv viewers see that ending, its likely going to be game of thrones 2.0.

As you predicted some of the things she said about the darkling and Alina being half Shu did annoy me. I feel like with Alina being half shu she just sort of glossed over the question which the interviewer brought up the critique that she had wished that they had explored Alina's Shu heritage outside of just the racism she faces and dive deeper into that which LB just basically said they will be exploring more about what it means for Alina to be Shu and Ravkan in season 2. I will say I do hope that they do cover more of the other cultures particularly the Shu culture as we got to know a little about the fjerdan culture through Matthias but we know very little about the Shu culture.

As for the darkling I am not going to go too much into it because its not really anything new I'm just resigned to the fact that LB and I are always going to have different opinions on his character and not to sound too harsh but I don't really care what her opinion or views are anymore. One thing I will point out though is this little tidbit:

Leigh: Look, there's never been a problem creating sympathy for the Darkling. This is a very beloved character, sometimes to my great frustration.

I mean this is nothing us darklinas didn't already know but the next time an anti says that LB never had a problem with people liking the darkling/darklina show them this interview where she openly admits that she found it frustrating. I do kind of feel for her I guess it must be frustrating to write a villain that you meant for everyone to hate only for them to become the most loved/popular character in your series.

[sicklyscribe]

y’all thought I forgot about this one

a good (3) of you really wanted this meta and well. It’s been like. Four years? Anyways. 

‘Stolen Dance’ was on the radio today and it makes me think of Klaus and Care, because I get it mixed up with ‘Dangerous’ and that’s my song for them. Also, Stolen Dance has a line that I THOUGHT was ‘Stolen Paradise’ and it’s ACTUALLY ‘stoned in paradise’ so I USED to get K/C vibes from that. Anyways. Whenever I think of that ship I think of @hairzier, and I remembered that I had given her a teaser of this meta a while back. Before I got home, I had FINALLY constructed a thesis (wow amy what a nerd) for this analysis that I’d tried to write FOREVER ago, but it didn’t have a central focus and it was way too bogged down with me trying to find one as I went along. 

Don’t know what the hell I’m talking about?

The meta is this: Klaus as an artist + Klaus’ relationships with three featured women in his life circa 2010′s. If you came to the fandom late or haven’t ever seen my username, hi, I used to write a ton of TO meta, I Don’t Do Ships Really At All For It. At least, not the ‘big’ ones. I digress. Just -- don’t expect me to bash or gush over any ship, I’m gonna compliment and critique them all. Please avoid or read on accordingly <3

Caroline: The Art

I tried to find my write-up for Sahar from ages ago, because it was clear and concise and exactly what I intended. Oh well. Once more. 

Shippers and Antis pretty much love it and hate it for the same reason: Klaus is so different around her. Well, that and it’s either empowering for Caroline or abusive. Depends on perspective. I am firmly in the camp that every relationship in Klaus’ life during this time period is abusive in some way. What he does to Caroline is particularly messed up, but also particularly kind, in turns. The lightness and puppy-love-ness of Klaus around her was so jarring, is so jarring, because he doesn’t display that behavior for anyone else. He allows himself to be foolishly partial to her, but he also seems to only have selective guilt for the horrors he subjects her to. As a viewer who will bend over backwards to create complexity rather than label something ‘bad writing’, I found that Klaus’ relationships, especially with women, especially with Caroline, are steeped in his relationship with art. 

To Klaus, Caroline is an exquisite work of living art. Pleasing to the eye, challenging to his thoughts, but benign -- safe, and static. More than wanting to ‘own’ her, though, I believe he wants to join her. Make himself into something that compliments her colors and her lines, because the experience of interacting with art is one of the purest joys Klaus knows. In this way, he intimately analyzes her life and feelings, he inserts himself into her narrative, he plays a part that he enjoys -- maybe one, at times, he truly wishes was not a performance. In this way, he adores her, he respects her, but not really as a person, and certainly not as an equal. He values every moment with her, treasures it; lets himself get drunk on it. She’s the Mona Lisa, living, breathing, and bold enough to insult him to his face. When she breaks the frame he makes for her -- when she really challenges him in ways only a person can -- he can only retreat, and lash out. 

And ask for forgiveness with acts of kindness, or material value (he even, incredibly, uses his art to soften her to him, on more than one occasion) -- trying to shift her attention as if she can forget his abuses.  In all: he wants her to enrich his life, not change it. 

Hayley: The Clay

(Or the canvas, or materials, or what have you.)

One of Hayley’s first scenes with Klaus sets her up as a direct foil to Caroline: 

Klaus: Painting is a metaphor for control. Every choice is mine-- the canvas, the color. As a child, I had neither a sense of the world nor my place in it, but art taught me that one's vision can be achieved with sheer force of will. The same is true of life, provided one refuses to let anything stand in one's way.

Hayley: So this is your thing-- show a girl a few mediocre paintings, whine about your childhood, and I swoon and spill all my dirty secrets?

Hayley doesn’t want to see him as a person. Klaus doesn’t really want to see her as a person, either. Eventually, he learns that he has to respect her as a mother, at least, or he will not deserve his daughter. Eventually, he learns to see her as family. But at the core, and I don’t think he ever loses this -- he sees Hayley as his work-in-progress. Potential. Not only to be a strong ally, but to be -- just maybe -- an equal.

Which is annoying for him, because she also happens to be the only person he cannot reliably control, or predict. His only choice is to try to shape her into someone that he can work with. That someone is himself, mostly, but with some key improvements. His tone with her is so often instructive, mentor-ly, a thin veneer above his need for her to be someone he doesn’t have to worry about, damn it! He can understand her so why can’t he control her! 

This kicks into gear, mostly, after Hayley’s transformation. She estranges herself from Elijah, somewhat, and Klaus does not interfere with her spiral into blood and rage because it’s part of the process. He sees himself in her, but not like he saw himself in Marcel. His perspective on Marcel was so tied to fatherhood that he was trying to raise a young Klaus, while in Hayley’s case, he is trying to sculpt her in his image. 

His advice on how to deal with rage, vengeance, and wildness is sincere and from personal experience. His advice on what to do about love? Well, certainly stay with Elijah while it’s convenient for me, but don’t let love blind you to what you need. What we need. What I need. Don’t tell Jackson you slept with my brother -- honesty won’t keep this vital political alliance strong. Don’t forget you’re one of us now. It’s what I would do. 

I guess you could even say that Hayley, while pregnant, was a very different kind of work-in-progress for Klaus that made it near-impossible for him to see her as anything but a thing meant to be changed or cause change. Art, unfinished, and his. 

Camille: The Critic

All of these relationships are unique and powerful in their own ways. I admit I’m partial to the poetry of this one, the radicalness of this one, but again, I don’t really ship it as a romance? Maybe I do, now that I’ve had time away from it, but I don’t ‘stan’ it as ‘otp’. 

This one is obvious. Their ‘art’ scene is straightforward, and kind of cliche. A woman watches a street artist fill a huge canvas. Another passerby notices, and stops to ask her what she thinks. She floors him with her response -- so insightful, so bold, and so compassionate. The clever bartender that Marcel has a crush on just so happens to be a psychologist -- and, he learns later, with a particular, personal empathy for violent and cruel offenders. 

He feels a unique desire to be seen by her, and to be considered by her, in his entirety. Not that he does not want to control what she knows -- obviously -- but that he does not want to put on a single, convenient mask with her to accomplish his ends. He wants to be known, and he wants to know what she thinks of him. 

Again, he does not want any of this to touch him, or change him, really. He begins his Gallery Of Self not by making a therapy appointment but by ‘hiring’ (forcing) her to transcribe his biography (and making her forget everything she knows the moment she leaves his sight). This is safe, and it lets him bring out the masks and the goals and the good and the ugly of him and air them for her reaction. Will he, too, be worthy of empathy? 

Yes. But he’s also worthy of critique. Eventually, he takes baby steps to allowing her to impact his life (to varying degrees throughout all seasons that, in my opinion, make for a shamefully circular set of arcs on the writers’ parts. The point is I saw where they were trying to go with it, and letting Drama of the Week get in the way). Eventually, he makes real appointments. Tells himself he needs to change, somewhat, for Hope’s sake. 

And Camille is the kind of strong, confident woman he can imagine Hope to someday resemble. He wants his daughter to be free from the cycles of Mikaelson abuse, and he wants her to know goodness and have no reason to be evil. And if he is to do that, and if he is to know that Hope, then someone like Camille should be able to look at him and deem him capable. Worthy. Warts and all. He’ll spend time with her because he likes her, because he’s attracted to the beauty in her heart (like Caroline!) -- but he opens himself to her scrutiny because for once in his life he knows he has to change for the better. He knows he has to get help, and, well, the clever bartender seemed to fall into his life at exactly the right time to take in all of his decades and all of his deeds -- piece by piece, movement by movement, style by style, and understand them. Critique them. Maybe with that in mind he can make himself into a work that he can one day show to Hope. 

With that in mind, I can’t help but have a soft spot for those cheesy lines from the very first episode.

Klaus: Do you paint?

Cami: No, but I admire. Every artist has a story, you know.

Klaus: And what do you suppose his story is?

Cami: He's...angry. Dark. Doesn't feel safe and doesn't know what to do about it. He wishes he could control his demons instead of having his demons control him. He's lost. Alone.

Cami: Or maybe he just drank too much tonight. Sorry. Overzealous Psych major.

Klaus: No. I think you were probably right the first time.

@florafaunaandeldritchhorrors @ptonkin @furrydolphin @jungshoook (DID YOU ABANDON THE KLEBEKAH URL REDIRECT????? MOM??????!?!!?!??!?!??!?!!?!!?!??! I JUST CHECKED AND IT’S NOT THERE ANYMORE???? I NEED TO *MOURN* AND YOU JUST DIDN’T *TELL* US??!)

[10nant-obsessed-writer]

Somewhere Only We Know: Alec Hardy x Reader

Warnings: N/A, it’s pretty much a fluff fic

Word Count: ~4.55 K

Sidenote: This is the first fic I’m posting for this blog. It’s just one of many works in progress. It’s loosely based off the song Somewhere Only We Know by Keane. The fic is taking place in the 3rd season timeline for Broadchurch where Alec and his daughter are having their issues. You’re also going to see a softer side of Alec, who only wants to be a good dad and wants someone to love and be loved by. So enjoy everyone! Critique is always appreciated and if you want to be on a taglist (permanent or for a specific character) please let me know. Happy Reading!

I'm getting old and I need something to rely on

So tell me when you're gonna let me in

I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

Detective Inspector Alec Hardy is very hard to get to know. We’ve gone on a few dates over the course of a few months, that’s of course when he’s managed to take some time away from work. I do like the man and I like to think that he likes me too, except he has a hard time showing that. I see his daughter Daisy every day since I’m one of her teachers, so I’ve been trying to get her to spill a few details about her dad without her knowing that’s what I’m doing, but I’m also just trying to be there for her because I know she needs an adult to look up to.

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The bell for the beginning of free period just rang and that happens to be the last period of the day. Daisy stays behind and spends part of her free period with me because as of late there have been a few boys messing with her.

I said, “Dais you want to tell me what’s going on?”

She said, “not really no. Nothing’s changed, they still won’t leave me alone.”

I said, “have you told your dad? He is the DI after all?”

She said, “no. I don’t really see my dad very often. He’s always at work.”

Oh, don’t I know that sweetheart, don’t I know that.

I said, “I’m sorry. I know you wanted to finally have that bond with your dad.”

She said, “yeah. I think I’m going to move back in with my mum.”

Oh, sweet girl don’t do that. I know just how much that will kill Alec because she’s about all he ever talks about when we do see each other.

I said, “I think you should wait on that Daisy.”

She said, “I don’t know if I want to though Ms. Y/L/N.”

I said, “how about this: give it a week. If things don’t seem like they’re getting any better then we’ll talk again okay?”

She said, “I think I can do that. I’m not going to make you any promises though.”

I nodded my head and said, “that’s more than okay. I’m just glad that you will consider it. Now how about we leave early?”

She said, “I’m so ready to go and are you walking me home?”

I said, “that’s what I was thinking to do yes, so that I know you’re safe, and not being ambushed by those guys.”

She said, “oh okay. Yeah let’s go. Thank you though. I’ve never had someone take this much interest in me.”

I said, “oh you darling girl. I’ll always be here for you. You’re my favorite after all.”

She smiled and collected all of her things throwing them into her bag. I did the same. We walked out of the classroom, down the hallway, and exited the building.

As we were walking back to her house, we were stopped by her dad, who must’ve been on his way back to the station.

Alec said, “Dais what’re you doing?”

Daisy said, “oh um hi dad. I’m just walking home with Ms. Y/L/N.”

Alec said, “I see that and Y/N what’re you doing?”

I said, “walking Daisy home Alec.”

Alec said, “and why are you doing that?”

I said, “I will tell you later.”

Daisy gave me a look like please don’t tell him.

Alec said, “why don’t you both get in and I’ll drop you off at home Dais.”

We both got into the car. Daisy got in the backseat, so I was forced to sit in the passenger seat next to Alec. It was like a 5-minute drive to their house, where Alec dropped Daisy off.

Daisy said, “see you tomorrow Ms. Y/L/N and maybe I’ll see you sometime tonight dad” before turning and walking into the house.

Alec turned and looked at me. He said, “where to?”

I said, “take me home?”

He said, “I can do that. Now are you going to tell me what’s going on with Daisy?”

I said, “I don’t know if I can break her trust by telling you.”

He said, “please?”

I said, “if I tell you, you don’t say a word of this to Daisy and just wait for her to tell you these things on her own. Promise?”

He said, “right yes I promise. Just please tell me.”

I said, “basically there’s these guys who have been giving her a real hard time and have photos of her that they’re threatening to leak all over the school. Also, she wants to move back in with her mum.”

Alec said, “you mean to tell me that there’s these boys threatening my daughter with what I’m only assuming are nudes, and she doesn’t even want to live with me anymore.”

I said, “yeah” and looked down at my lap.

He fell silent and just nodded his head. I could tell it was taking everything in him not to break down into tears or go into protective father mode or both.

I looked up and said, “hey Alec look at me.”

He turned and looked at me.

I said, “I’m doing everything in my power to protect your daughter and keep her here with you. Why do you think I was walking her home today? I don’t want anything to happen to her either. She’s a bright girl with a beautiful future ahead of her.”

He said, “thank you. I know I’m not the easiest person to deal with, but I want you to know that I’m trying. I do wish she would feel like I would be there for her and that I’d do anything for her. Also, I’m sorry I haven’t been too engaging with you. We’ve been going on dates for the past few months, but I’ve yet to try and let you in.”

I said, “hey it’s okay. You take as much time as you need okay. I know you’re always caught up with work, so I don’t even mind. If anything, I should hope that you’d spend more time with Daisy than you do with me. She misses you; you know? She’s been staying in my classroom for free period and we’ve had a lot of heart to hearts. I mean today was the first time she ever mentioned she wanted to leave, but that’s not the point. She needs you Alec, and I know you would do anything for her because she’s all you usually want to talk about. I can wait, your job can wait, but I don’t think Daisy can.”

He said, “I don’t know what I did to deserve you, but thank you. I will focus more on Daisy, but I also want to focus more on you too.”

I said, “I’m glad that you will focus more on Daisy because you both deserve that. I won’t stop you if you want to focus on me too if that’s what you want” and tried to hide the smile that was appearing on my face with my hand.

He said, “no you don’t. I want to see that pretty smile you have Y/N.” Then he took my hand in his.

We were turning down my street when he took my hand in his, so that I had no way to hide my smile. Alec pulled his car up front of my house a minute or so later.

I said, “well thank you for the ride home Alec.”

He said, “it was my pleasure Y/N. Do you think you’d like to come over to mine later tonight?”

I smirked and said, “that depends Detective Inspector Hardy, are you actually going to get off work at a reasonable time tonight?”

He said, “for you Y/N I think I might.”

Is he actively flirting with me right now?

I said, “well in that case, how could I say no?”

He said, “so should I pick you up on my way home then?”

I said, “yeah and you get to tell Daisy what I’m doing there.”

He said, “ugh okay I’ll go back home quick and explain everything and see if she’ll talk to me before I go back to work. I’ll see you later tonight then?”

I said, “it’s a date.”

Then I climbed out of the car and walked around his car so that I could walk into my house. I stopped in front of Alec’s rolled down window first. I leaned in and kissed him. The look of shock was so worth it when I pulled away.

I said, “bye Alec.”

He said, “until later Y/N.”

I walked away from his car and into my house.

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Is this the place we used to love?

Is this the place that I've been dreaming of?

It was about 6 hours later when I saw Alec pull up outside my house. It’s almost 10 o’clock. Damn he did get off relatively early for him. He got out of his car and walked up to my front door. I opened it before he could knock.

I said, “10 o’clock that’s fairly early for you there DI Hardy.”

He said, “yes, it is. Can I come in?”

I said, “yeah of course. Come on in.”

I moved out of the way, so he could walk into the house. I closed the door behind him. He walked into the front room and sat on the sofa. I went and sat down next to him.

I said, “I thought we were going round yours?”

He said, “yeah we are, I just wanted to talk to you before we do.”

I said, “okay?”

He said, “so I went back home and talked to Daisy after I dropped you off.”

I said, “mhm. How’d that go?”

He said, “not so great.”

I said, “what went wrong?”

He said, “she bought herself a train ticket, so she could move back in with her mum.”

I said, “she did what!? I told her to give it a week and see if things would get better between you two.”

He said, “yeah that didn’t happen. Miller told me to just rip Daisy’s ticket up and tell her that there’s no way she’s leaving.”

I said, “that’s not a bad idea. Ellie’s pretty smart, but if you don’t do it, I definitely will.”

He said, “I’ll give it a couple of days because the ticket isn’t for another week.”

I said, “that’s fair.”

He said, “I also told her about us.”

Just great, now I doubt she’ll trust me as much.

I said, “oh and that went over how?”

He said, “she was actually okay with it. I think she thinks you’ll be good for me.”

I said, “well I’d like to think I would be good for you too.”

He said, “you are probably too good for me, but I’m going to be a bit selfish and keep you.”

I said, “I don’t think I’m too good for you. I think I’m just the right amount of good for you. And from what I’ve heard when aren’t you selfish there Alec?”

He said, “really? That’s how you want to play this then” before pulling me into his side.

I never knew he could be this playful, but I really like this side of him.

I said, “so when are we going to yours?”

He said, “whenever you want to. Just know I’m keeping you overnight, so bring a change of clothes.”

I said, “now when did I agree to this Mr. Hardy?”

I couldn’t help but laugh at some of his facial expressions when he was thinking up an answer.

He said, “alright you win. Would you like to stay over at mine tonight Y/N?”

I said, “yeah I really would.”

He said, “good. Go get your stuff then.”

I said, “yep still bossy.”

He said, “will you please go get your stuff, so we can go back to mine?”

I said, “I was just teasing you, but yes I’ll go get my stuff when you decide you want to let me go.”

He said, “I think I’m just going to hold on to you for a little bit longer and then I’ll let you go.”

I said, “or you could let me get up and get my stuff, we go round yours, and you can hold me for longer.”

He said, “that’s actually a better idea” and let me out of his arms.

I got up off my sofa and walked into my bedroom to grab the clothes I was planning to wear to school tomorrow. Once I had gotten my things together, I went back out into my living room, where Alec was still sitting on the sofa.

I said, “alright, I’m ready lets go.”

Alec got up off my sofa and walked over towards me.

He said, “you got everything?”

I said, “yep.”

He said, “well alright. Lets go.”

Alec walked out the front door. I made sure to shut any and all lights off and lock up the door, before making my way to his car. Alec was leaning up against it, just looking at me.”

I said, “what?”

He said, “nothing Y/N. It’s just you are stunning.”

I just shook my head and said, “you’re not so bad yourself there Alec.”

He had the audacity to look shocked and said, “the cheek.”

I knew the look he was giving me was fake, so I laughed and said, “you’ll get used to it.”

He said, “that I will Y/N.”

I smiled and walked around the car to get into the passenger seat. I threw my bag into the back and then fastened myself in the passenger seat. Alec got himself situated in the driver’s seat before driving us to his place.

The car ride was quiet save for the radio playing in the background. Alec did take my hand in his though when he was driving. He’s really trying to make an effort and I like that.

When we got to his place, Alec shut the car off. He let go of my hand and got out of the car. He walked around the car and opened the passenger door for me. Okay that’s new, but I’m not going to complain. He also got my bag out of the back for me, and took my hand again as we walked into his house.

Alec showed me around his house for the most part. Daisy’s room wasn’t included for the fact that she was already asleep. He took me into his room. I set my bag down on the floor next to his bed.

He said, “if you want to change into something more comfortable and then come back in here, we’re just going to be laying here and watching some telly if that’s okay.”

I said, “that sounds good to me, but I um forgot to bring something comfortable to change into. I just brought the clothes I would need to go to work tomorrow.”

He said, “oh! Well do you want to borrow something of mine?”

I said, “I don’t want to inconvenience you.”

He said, “no I insist. I don’t want you to have to sleep in your work clothes. I definitely do it too often, so I know how uncomfortable it is.”

I said, “well then sure, if you don’t mind.”

He said, “of course. Just hold on a second.”

Alec went over to his wardrobe and pulled out two pairs of sleep pants and some old t-shirt. He walked back over to me and handed me the t-shirt and a pair of sleep pants.

I said, “thank you.”

He said, “you’re welcome. You don’t mind that I don’t sleep with a shirt on do you?”

I said, “no that’s perfectly fine by me.”

He said, “alright good. I’m going to go ahead and change now.”

I nodded my head in understanding. I’m not going to go change in the other room. I’m not ashamed in the slightest of my body or anything like that.

I look over at Alec and he’s already out of his suit jacket and shirt. He was in the process of taking his tie off. I went ahead and pulled my cardigan off before then taking my blouse off. I noticed Alec staring. I just blushed and slipped his t-shirt on before focusing back on Alec. He kicked off his shoes and socks, and was sliding his trousers down his legs.

Damn he has a really nice body. I slid my jeans down and contemplated putting Alec’s sleep pants on. Alec pulled his sleep pants up over those ridiculously long legs and then went to lay on his bed. I’m going to skip the pants, I think. I went and climbed onto Alec’s bed next to him.

He said, “didn’t want to wear the pants?”

I said, “I usually don’t wear sleep pants to bed, so I really didn’t want to put them on. If it makes you uncomfortable though, I can go put them on.”

He said, “I don’t mind, as long as you’re comfortable.”

I said, “I’m very comfortable. Thank you.”

He said, “good. Do you have any preference to what we watch on the telly?”

I said, “no. You can pick because I’m not sure I’m going to stay awake once it’s on.”

He said, “alright. I’ll put something that we both won’t actually need to pay attention to on.”

I said, “that’s perfect. Now I was promised more holding once we got here Alec.”

He said, “let me turn the telly on and then I’ll hold you for as long as you’d like.”

I said, “don’t tempt me.”

He just smiled and turned the telly on. A rerun of Top Gear was on, so he just left it on. Alec turned the volume down on the telly though. Then he placed the remote on his bedside table next to where his glasses sat. He opened his arms for me to scoot into. I moved so that I was laying in his arms. My head was on his chest and his arms were wrapped around me. It definitely won’t take long for me to fall asleep like this.

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And if you have a minute why don't we go

Talk about it somewhere only we know?

It’s been a couple of days since I’ve spent the night at Alec’s. He’s been really attentive to not only me, but to Daisy. I really like how Alec is choosing to let me into his life more. I knew there was an awesome guy under that hard exterior.

Alec had texted me earlier this morning and said he was going to stop by the school on my lunch break because he wanted to talk to me. I don’t know if I should be concerned or not.

It was just after 12 o’clock when my lunch break was set to begin. Alec texted me saying he was outside, so I walked out of the building. I saw his car and he was leaning against it. Honestly what a sight to see. I walked over to his car.

Alec said, “good afternoon Y/N.”

I said, “good afternoon Alec. What did you want to talk to me about?”

He said, “get in the car and we’ll talk.”

I said, “you know that doesn’t sound too promising.”

He said, “I promise it’s nothing bad. I just want to give us some privacy.”

I said, “okay I’ll get in the car.”

I walked around the car and got into the passenger seat. Alec climbed back into the driver’s seat.

Alec said, “so I talked to Daisy this morning.”

I said, “and how did that go?”

He said, “well I managed to get her to tell me what was going on with those boys, but then we saw them when I was driving her here this morning.”

I said, “let me guess, she told you not to stop, but you did anyway. Then you threatened them?”

He said, “I knew there was a reason I liked you. Yes, that’s exactly what I did and the boys didn’t like it too well especially because I’m the police, but I’m a dad first. They had it coming though and if they keep messing with my Dais I’ll cut their pricks off.”

I said, “good for you Alec. I’m proud of you and I almost wish I could’ve been there to witness it because I’d love to have given them a piece of my mind too. Well that and because I think you look mighty attractive when you’re angry, not more than you usually do of course, it’s just different.”

He said, “Thank you Y/N. Anyways when I got back in the car after confronting them, Daisy wasn’t too happy with me, but at the same time she was because she knows I’m not going to let anything happen to her. Then I asked her for her train ticket, which she gave me, and then I ripped it into many small pieces.”

I said, “good on you love. It’s better for both you and Daisy if she stays here. You’re finally putting her first and I’m sure even if she doesn’t show it, she appreciates all that you’re doing for her.”

He said, “yes you’re right, but I can’t thank you enough for all you’ve done for Daisy too. You’ve been there for her since she moved here with me, and you’ve always stayed objective not letting our relationship get in the way of doing what you could for Daisy.”

I said, “well thank you. I would do anything for Daisy. She is a sweet girl, who’s been having a rough time, and I can completely relate to her. Also, what relationship of ours would that be Alec?”

He said, “oh don’t make me say it.”

I said, “come on Alec. You know you want to and I know I want you to.”

He said, “well even though I unofficially considered you my girlfriend, would you be mine?”

I said, “yes I would Alec. I unofficially was considering you my boyfriend too just for your information. All I wanted was for you to say it aloud because then I knew it was for sure a real thing and I wasn’t getting my hopes up.”

He said, “after the other night there was no doubt in my mind that I wanted to be with you even if I am difficult to be with and I’m not the best at opening up.”

I said, “you know that never bothered me. I’m willing to give you as much time as you could possibly need, especially with the job you have because I know how hard opening up is. We’ve got a way to go jointly with opening up, but I have no worries that we’ll get there in time.”

He said, “I don’t deserve you and everything you’ve done for me and mine, but I’m definitely keeping you.”

I said, “it’s a good thing I’m keeping you too then huh?”

He laughed and took my hand in his. Then my phone dinged. I checked it and it was a text from Daisy.

I said, “Alec, your daughter can see us and she says she’s ‘ill’ and wants to go home.”

He said, “since when does my daughter text you? Also tell her that I know she’s faking it, but it’s fine I’ll give her a ride home before I go back to work.”

I said, “Daisy texts me whenever she wants to or whenever she needs someone to talk to. I gave her my number ages ago. Alright I’ll tell her to get her arse out here then after she goes and signs herself out.”

He said, “you want to take the rest of the day off?”

I said, “and how am I going to do that Mr. Hardy?”

He said, “I’ll just say I need you down at the station for questioning about a case, that doesn’t actually exist, and you can come over to my place and well spend time with Daisy and me.”

I said, “so you’re going to take the rest of the day off too then if I say yes.”

He said, “yes because the both of us have been working too hard and need a good half day.”

I said, “and how would you get away with that?”

He said, “I’ll put Miller in charge and say that I’m needed at home because Daisy is sick.”

I said, “and the school thinks Daisy is sick, so it would be believable. Also, Ellie is the best and will see right through it, but yeah alright I’ll take the rest of the day off.”

He said, “great. Well I’m going to go inside and talk to the administration, but also grab Daisy and tell her you’re coming over to spend time with us. You go get your stuff and meet me outside of the office.”

I said, “sounds like a plan.”

Alec leaned across the console and kissed me.

Oh, okay yeah that was nice, a bit unexpected, but definitely nice. I blinked in surprise, but I kissed him back. We pulled away though after a few moments and we got out of the car. We walked into the building and went our separate directions. I walked to my classroom and grabbed my things, thanking god it was nearing the end of the lunch period, so my room was still clear of students. After grabbing my things, I made my way back towards the office.

As I was nearing the office, I saw Alec and Daisy waiting for me. Alec was on the phone and Daisy was smiling at me. I stuck my tongue out at Daisy and she laughed. Alec noticed and rolled his eyes. Some things never change. I walked over to them and all 3 of us walked out of the building and towards Alec’s car.

Daisy said, “so you’re really taking the rest of the day off to spend time with me and dad?”

I said, “yes I am. It seemed none of us wanted to finish our day doing what we’re supposed to be doing.”

She said, “yeah you’re right.”

Alec finally hung up the phone.

He said, “I just got off the phone with Miller. She’s taking over for the rest of the day. Now, Y/N the administration knows you’re done for today and they didn’t question it. Also, Dais you’re going home and you’re not leaving the house to keep up the idea that you’re ill.”

Daisy said, “whatever you say dad.”

I said, “okay.”

Alec said, “don’t give me that cheek Daisy.”

She rolled her eyes. I had to bite my lip to keep from laughing. Then we reached the car. I got in the passenger seat, Daisy got in the back, and Alec got in the driver’s seat. Alec pulled out of the car park once we were all situated and we were off to their place. I’m going to have to get used to being there because I know that’s about to be where I spend a lot of my time outside of the school.

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It’s nice that I have the opportunity to be integrated into this little family and for that I’m going to be forever thankful. It’s going to take time for all of the kinks to get worked on and out, but I’m happy. The future is going to go somewhere only we know.

Permanent Taglist: @jiswoogannon

[lesbianrobin]

oh.... yes..... as an adhd steve-lover (and person who has a history of unknowingly crushing on adhd characters) i beg to hear ur reasoning......... please...

alright so a lot of this is gonna be like projection ddnkjcn and it turned into more of a general character analysis than an adhd analysis and i’m sure that some things i describe will differ from your personal experience so feel free to critique me but here goes:

Why Steve Harrington Has ADHD

Steve struggles in school, yeah, but that’s not really… crucial to my reasoning? I personally did pretty well in school despite having difficulties with getting work done on time and understanding certain things. The fact that he clearly tried to do well and just couldn’t is what’s important. That’s a classic ADHD thing, feeling like there’s some kind of invisible block making it impossible to think the way you’re supposed to be thinking and do the things you’re supposed to be doing. We see him studying a few different times with Nancy (though he’s reluctant to focus on the task in s1), it’s implied he’s written multiple drafts of the essay that he shows Nancy in the beginning of s2, meaning that he wants to do well. After Nancy critiques his essay, he basically decides to give up because he’ll never be able to make it good enough, and he probably shouldn’t even bother applying to college, and he’ll just end up working for his dad anyway. It’s a bit of an extreme jump from the relatively mild criticism he receives, but it seems to me like the kind of mindset that I (and others with ADHD) fall into constantly. First of all, rewriting something you’ve already written when you have ADHD can be… torturous. It’s impossible to focus because you’ve done it already, it feels pointless and boring, and your brain is just done with the topic. To Steve, there’s no point in even trying because he’s never gonna get it right, and he’d rather not even try than apply to college and have to suffer rejection. ADHD isn’t laziness or apathy. People with ADHD actually tend to care a lot about their performance in various aspects of life, and they care so much that it can often either propel them to excellence or drive them to depression over failure (whether that failure is true or perceived). Spoiler alert: we’re about to get into rejection sensitive dysphoria, folks!

I think this describes Steve perfectly. He wants to be the best at everything (Prom King, anyone?) and he cares a lot about what people think of him (to the degree that he spent three of his four years in high school behaving specifically to avoid the possibility of Tommy H and others making fun of him). Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, or RSD, is a condition which impacts almost all people with ADHD. This means that they are far more sensitive than most people to what others think about them. Think about Steve’s entire character arc: he essentially spends season one chasing the approval of Tommy, Carol, and Nancy. When Tommy and Carol’s desired behavior differs from Nancy’s, causing conflict, he’s forced to take a look at himself and decide what’s more important to him: pleasing his friends, or doing what’s right. Since Steve is a certified angel, he goes with what’s right, and from there goes on to apologize to Jonathan and help him and Nancy fight the Demogorgon. (Sidenote: the fistfight with Jonathan could definitely be considered as further evidence of ADHD! RSD can cause extreme emotional reactions when the person in question feels that they have been hurt or rejected, such as Steve believing that Nancy cheated on him with Jonathan. The fact that Steve resorted to cruel insults that he clearly doesn’t believe shows that he was acting out of his own hurt and anger, not out of true hatred for Jonathan.) 

Anyway, s1 Steve’s entire life is built around seeking approval from his peers. He realizes that his desire for approval has turned him into somebody that he doesn’t like, so he makes a change, and by s2 we see that he’s shifted somewhat: Now, he wants to please Nancy. He’s able to handle being mocked by Billy and Tommy H because he no longer puts any stock in their brand of approval, but being told by Nancy that she doesn’t love him elicits another (somewhat) extreme emotional response: he immediately leaves her at the party with Jonathan and doesn’t pick her up for school the next morning. He’s upset with her. Later on, he goes to her house with flowers intending to apologize, though he doesn’t actually know what he’s apologizing for. All he wants is for Nancy to be with him and like him again, because he can’t handle feeling unloved and rejected. S2 is also where we see Steve’s academic insecurity, and he hints at issues with feeling like a failure in the eyes of his father. By the end of the season, he’s able to handle not being loved by Nancy because he’s found a new source of self-esteem and approval: Dustin and the rest of the kids. Through acting as their “babysitter,” Steve’s found something to take pride in that nobody can take away from him. Billy may have overshadowed his basketball stardom and broken his keg stand record, but Steve no longer needs these shallow achievements to feel a sense of self-worth. 

S3 shows that, although he’s moved on from seeking approval from specific peers, Steve is still stuck searching for validation. He flirts indiscriminately hoping for anybody to respond positively, and he gets a job to appease his father. Here, I’m gonna jump ahead a little bit (because that’s just the way my brain is saying it’s gotta be lmao) and talk about a few of Steve’s other canon traits, then circle back around to how we see his ongoing struggle with RSD manifest in s3.

Now for the trait that people more commonly associate with ADHD, especially in men and young boys: hyperactivity. This one is a little more self-explanatory so I’m not gonna spend as much time on it. Steve excels in situations with clearly defined rules and expectations where it’s easier to stay on-track, as well as in high-pressure, fast-paced environments. This is why he succeeds in basketball and why he’s such a big damn hero every season. He thinks on his feet and steps up in intense situations without hesitation. Steve is the one who wedged something under the elevator door so that everyone could escape, he’s the one who took out a Russian soldier before he was able to alert anybody else, and when he saw Billy about to ram into Team Griswold Family, he crashed into Billy’s car. Part of this is the fact that it’s a sci-fi action horror show, and there are going to be dramatic action-packed situations, but it’s telling that if Steve is around, he’s almost always the one leaping into danger and adapting to the situation to deal with it quickly. Speaking of s3: The conversation Steve and Robin had on the floor in the Russian torture chamber!

This feeds into an even more elaborate Steve meta theory of mine about how he basically lives his life as if it’s a play and there’s a script and a set of rules that he’s gotta follow to please the audience, so I’m not gonna go into ALL of it, but this conversation is also important to the idea of Steve having ADHD and struggling with RSD. Steve says, “It just baffles me. Everything that people tell you is important, everything that people say you should care about, it’s all just… bullshit.” When Robin says that she feels like her life has been “one big error,” he agrees. So far, Steve has lived his whole life according to one set of rules. If you flirt with girls and go to parties and play basketball, you’ll be cool and popular. Now that he’s graduated, he’s floundering. The structure of high school is gone and everything he worked for doesn’t actually matter in real life. People with ADHD often struggle more than others with the transition from high school to either college or the working world. Loss of familiar frameworks, routines, and actions can hit the ADHD mind hard, and this is pretty clearly happening to Steve in s3. In the beginning of the season, he can’t even manage to have a decent conversation with a girl without bringing up school and his own perceived failures. Sidenote: Robin also mentions that Steve was late to class every single day, which is both extremely relatable to me and the most ADHD thing I’ve ever heard. I knew exactly how long it took me to get from my house to the school, and I woke up with plenty of time to get ready every single morning, yet I somehow managed to be late so many mornings that I got multiple detentions and ended up having to skip a couple of classes entirely because another tardy would have fucked up my disciplinary record.

Later on in the bathroom scene, when he’s talking about why he didn’t talk to Robin back in school, Steve says, “…maybe ‘cause Tommy H would’ve made fun of me or I wouldn’t be Prom King. It’s stupid…” and it’s somewhat of a continuation of the earlier conversation. Steve is expressing the same sentiment. Now that he’s out of high school, everything that he once used to measure his success and self-worth is just stupid. This is another classic RSD thing! People with ADHD/RSD often set impossibly high standards for themselves and then struggle with self-hatred and doubt when they cannot live up to these expectations. Robin kind of inspires and encourages him to set new, more attainable standards for himself. Spending time with Robin makes Steve happy in a way that he’s never really been before, and he realizes that all of the benchmarks of normalcy and success that he’s been striving for don’t guarantee happiness like they’re supposed to. Instead of finding happiness in academic, romantic, or athletic success, he finds happiness in an unlikely friendship. His whole arc for three seasons has essentially been a big struggle with RSD and impulsivity where he learned how to handle social rejection and place the needs and feelings of others before his own.

There’s also a ton of little things in Joe Keery’s acting choices that support ADHD Steve, like his near-perpetual motion and the way that he’s gotta pace and eat a damn banana (both the traditional way and the no-homo breaking it into pieces way, might I add) so he can listen to Dustin talk about the Russian code. I personally relate to a lot of things he does, like mixing up basic names and facts (like Nazis/Germans in s2 and Gumby/gumbo in s3), and needing to explain a whole situation out loud before he really gets it (like when he runs down the entire monster situation in the mall in s3). I don’t know if those are ADHD things but they make me feel Seen. 

Anyways. That’s about it!! Thanks for asking lmao

[grouchomarxiste-blog1]

Bong Joon-Ho’s Parasite: Marx and Violence

Warning: A majority of this was written pre-pandemic, so please excuse my overly optimistic tone. It was a different time.

Yes, another Bong Joon-Ho film. Can you blame me? The guy’s a genius. Parasite was another one of those great films that will never leave you. You can watch the movie simply without doing a major analysis in your head and you will still agree that it’s a great movie. Which personally, is why I believe it's made its way into the major American awards season. Parasite winning Best Foreign Film at the Golden Globes was one of the few decisions I’ve agreed with. I didn’t see any of the winners in the film categories besides Parasite, and I’m very much ok with that. It’s making its way into Hollywood and the favorite lists of celebrities. Elon Musk said he loved Parasite (he also turned Grimes, the former “anti-imperialist,” to the mother of his future child). Chrissy Teigen loved Parasite (a lot can be said about her, so let’s not). Obama loved Parasite (but I have some serious doubts about the authenticity of his yearly favorites list. Mainly because I can’t imagine him listening to Summer Walker). I was completely boggled at all of those tweets. How? How is one so blind? How did one watch Parasite and not feel a thing? After I watched Parasite, I rushed back to school to attend the discussion section of my Political Theory class so I could read and discuss primitive accumulation through dispossession with revolutionary fervor. I recommended it to everyone near me. I even wrote a note to my professor who tucked it into his book. But is that the problem- that all these beloved figures (not mine) end up loving the sheer adrenaline of the story and tweet to their followers about how great the movie is. Those followers, with their favorite celebrities’ seal of approval, watch the movie, not putting it together either. Bong Joon-Ho is critiquing those very figures! In every post-Parasite interview, Bong Joon-Ho has said that Parasite is about America and capitalism, but we have just reduced those statements to memes on Twitter. As funny as they are, Parasite is rich for its class analysis. The Hollywood reaction is just as important. Marx is all over this movie, there's no question about it. I also want us to understand these controversial moments from a Fanonian perspective, again all with relation to Marx. I hope for us to understand that everything about this movie is intentional and every bit of it is worth pages and pages of discussion. I nearing 11 pages as I write this. I also hope that this film can be a way for us to understand economic exploitation in the 21st century. While many celebrities have misunderstood it, it is important that you, us, the people, the working class, grasp every bit of this radical film.

I’m not going to bother with another one of my “brief summary” because I’m assuming, we’ve all seen it. It's on Hulu now and I believe Apple TV. If you don’t want to pay for either platforms, watch a pirated version online, I genuinely don’t think Bong will mind.

I want to talk about the home. I know we all had the same reaction to that beautiful home: awe, admiration, and envy. The Park’s home itself is significant, but also in contrast to the Kims’ home. The Kim’s live in a small semi-basement home, where they have to reach up in order to look out their window and see the street level. Their home is dirty, cramped, just not a place where anyone wants to be. But immediately, I thought of Fanon and the native sector. I know that Parasite isn’t about colonialism, but space is important to Marx (I’ll return to Fanon). In The Communist Manifesto, Marx and Engels attribute many things to the process of proletarianization. To name a few: literacy campaigns and public education, the politicization of the proletariat towards the end of feudalism, expansion of media, etc. One that stands out, is the mass migration and urbanization of the proletariat. Through that, the proletariat was concentrated into the poorest parts of the city where they shared their most intimate quarters with workers like themselves (Marx and Engels, 15) One might dismiss this as a historical example specific to Europe, but if we go back to my thoughts on Memories of Murder, we’d note how Korea’s transition to a modern capitalist society, was a fairly recent one (from 1987 onwards). As the agricultural sector suffered, Koreans living in the rural provinces were forced to move into the major cities. Park (Song Kang-Ho’s character in Memories) was lucky enough to become a successful businessman, unlike the Kims who earn their livelihood by holding pizza boxes- the most insignificant work. Along with urbanization, the proletariat also occupied the small space of the factory, where they are reminded of the everyday brutality of their work. The Park’s home is not cramped, but the one scene where everyone is rushing to hide from them, results in Ki-taek, Ki-jeong, and Ki-woo hiding underneath a coffee table overnight. After that lengthy battle with Geun-sae and Moon-gwang, the Kims are exhausted. They do not want to be laying side by side hearing the Parks have sex. My friend Sef also reminded me that the Parks had weird sex as Mr. Park recalled how their old chauffeur possibly had sex with a drugged-up prostitute, a scenario that previously made Mrs. Park scream out of disgust. Revisiting this, I believe this definitely deserves a psychoanalytic analysis.

This isn’t their breaking point, but also hearing Mr. Park say that Ki-taek smells like the subway is a factor. Once making their break they run outside where it's raining heavily. They come to their home which is flooded and destroyed. Here is where I’ll start talking about Fanon. [READ NOTE]. Again, I know the colonial system is not the case in Parasite. Fanon was a Marxist and expanded on Marxist theory in the colonial context. I just want to warn you that I am using Fanon as carefully as possible, not using concepts that are distinctly racial. I know there’s probably also much more relevant work out there on spatiality and violence, but I think Fanon’s prose style in The Wretched of the Earthis quite appropriate for the film. Let’s consider the colonial bourgeoisie as the Parks and the natives as the Kims. Fanon calls the colonial world, a “compartmentalized world.” The colonists’ sector is clean and protected whereas the native sector is overcrowded, envious, and starving. Sounds about right so far.

The colonist’s sector is a sector built to last, all stone and steel. It’s a sector of lights and paved roads, where the trash cans constantly overflow with strange and wonderful garbage, undreamed-of leftovers. The colonizer’s feet can never be glimpsed, except perhaps in the sea, but then again you can never get close enough. They are protected by solid shoes in a sector where the streets are clean and smooth., without a pothole, without a stone… The colonized’s sector or at least the “native” quarters, the shanty town, the Medina, the reservation, is a disreputable place, inhabited by disreputable people. You are born anywhere, anyhow. You die anywhere, from anything. It’s a world with no space, people are piled one on top of each other. (Fanon, 4)

This becomes extremely relevant when the Kims run out of the Parks’ home in the pouring rain. I kept noticing that they were all barefoot, only focused on getting out of there. My toes curled in the movie theater watching that. Running away from that traumatic house to find your own home destroyed, relocating to a displacement camp, THEN going to work the next day for your unaffected employer who has the audacity to audibly take a sniff of you. I don't know about you, but to me, this sounds like the conditions for a proletarian revolution. Besides the literal allegory, the tone sharply shifts. One could argue that it began to change when they found Geun-sae in the bunker or when Moon-gwang hit her head but that was just some good old dark comedy for me. After the flooding, things are different. Ki-taek has this unmoving face. Things turned grim and we knew something climactic was about to happen. Fanon’s most famous chapter, “Concerning Violence,” maintains that decolonization will always be a violent event because colonialism is a violent system itself. Something that I absolutely love about this chapter is that it isn’t some dense, theoretical work. It’s a revolutionary call to arms for all colonized people. It has a strategic pace which parallels Parasite so well. He sets the scene- the compartmentalized, Manichaen world. He slowly intensifies the antagonistic relationship between the colonizer and the colonized, until this culminating point:

The colonized subject thus discovers that his life, his breathing and his heartbeat are the same as the colonist’s. He discovers that the skin of the colonist is not worth more than the “natives.” In other words, his world receives a fundamental jolt. The colonized’s revolutionary new assurance stems from this. If no longer strike fear into me or nail me to the spot and his voice can no longer petrify me. I am no longer uneasy in his presence. In reality, to hell with him. Not only does his presence no longer bother me, but i am already preparing to waylay him in such a way that he will no longer have any solution but to flee (Fanon, 10)

As corny as it sounds, when I first read that, it brought me to tears. I’m not sure if it was just because I was up for three days straight writing my midterm and I was finally breaking, or because it just meant that much to me. But that section in which the colonized discoversthat his life is worth as much as the colonizer is such a crucial moment. This parallels the infamous birthday scene. Geun-sae gets out of the bunker, stabs Ki-jung, the Park’s kid (I’ll look his name up later) has a seizure, and Chong-sook is wrestling with Geun-sae. Shit is going down. If we recall, Mrs. Park mentioned that it takes a few minutes for her son to die after a seizure and needs to go to the hospital immediately. So much is going on and Mr. Park starts screaming at Ki-taek to give him the keys. Ki-taek is immobilized at this point. His daughter has been stabbed, son attacked, wife almost killed, the Parks’ got him dressed up in some cultural appropriation, Hollywood Indian regalia. In fact, I find it very fitting that he’s dressed up as a Native American at this moment. I see this as Bong’s satirical nod to old ultra-capitalist Hollywood. But if enough wasn't going on, Mr. Park sniffed. He got close to Geun-sae, a man who’s been living underground for 3 years and audibly sniffed him in disgust. The same way that he sniffed Ki-taek. Of course, there’s probably a difference between a “subway” smell vs. “I haven't showered in 3 years” smell but at the moment it feels as if it's almost the same thing. In my initial viewing, I thought what happened next was because of that, but no. Ki-taek realized that his life was worth the same as the Parks, and their presence no longer bothers him, but he is now plotting against him, and the time of action is now. Ki-taek stabs Mr. Park and flees. Annoyingly, the YouTube section for this clip is filled with people feeling bad for the Parks and discussing how what Ki-taek did was wrong. Of course, the average viewer will view the Parks as some sympathetic rich suckers who only treated the Kims kindly. The casual reader who picks up Fanon for the first time would also dismiss his theory of violence as immoral in comparison to non-violent methods like Gandhi’s. A lot can be said about Gandhi, but Fanon says that non-violence is a strategy created by the colonizer to deter decolonization and paint the colonizer as a gentle ruler who wants peace. This is not the case. Colonialism is a violent system. Capitalism is a violent system. Colonialism can only be undone violently. Capitalism can only be undone violently. Now I don't mean to make this all about colonialism, as my friends say I often do. But the similarities are clear. The question isn’t whether the murder of Mr. Park was a justified act, but what were the conditions that forced Ki-taek to murder. Geun-sae killed Ki-jung, but no one in the comment section is having a debate on whether his murder was ethical. Because in our heads we feel bad for him, and the life that he’s lived- why don’t we feel the same towards Ki-taek? Geun-sae and Ki-taek are two sides of the same coin. Geun-sae’s exploitation is naked. He’s confined to the basement, controlling the lights of the home. A feature of the house that Mr. Park doesn't even pay attention to, never mind considering that there is someone manually operating it. A clear example of how our labor is alienated. All while blindly worshipping Mr. Park- a man who knows nothing of his existence. Honestly, I hope some of you see yourselves in Geun-sae the next time you defend billionaires online. But Ki-taek is just another exploited worker. I understand this can be hard to understand in our current understanding of the world. How is Ki-taek exploited? Him and his family conned their way into their jobs and leech off of the Parks. Again, we must return to the system as a whole to understand. None of this wouldn’t have happened if the Kims weren’t desperately poor in a capitalist society, which enables families like the Parks, to live a life of excess at the expense of the Kims. Capitalism is a system of exploitation; we cannot forget that. Quite simply, no one is rich without thousands that are poor.

          The levels of the home are also this unforgettable feature. I just want to make this quick note about the issue of the ghost. Did you forget about the ghost? Da-Song didn’t (yes, I finally looked his name up!). I find the story of the ghost such an interesting touch. Not just as a way for Bong to warn the audience about Da-Song’s history of seizures. When Mrs. Park tells Chung-sook of the story, she says “they say a ghost in the house brings wealth.” This, of course, is true since the exploitation of those like Geun-sae are responsible for the wealth of the Parks, in the larger picture. I’d like to look further into this. There's a twofold meaning to this. I do believe that this ghost is symbolic to the exploitation of the Kims, and the proletariat in general, but that’s Mrs. Park’s understanding of this ghost. The way she understands this ghost, is as a source of wealth. Maybe Mrs. Park isn’t as ditzy as we imagine- she to some degree, understands her class position. But like most, she doesn’t question the ghost, or her class position. She knows that if she looks into either, it would result in the ugly truth. Da-Song, however, is just a child. He’s too young to really understand the economic and social relations which are responsible for his wealth. He’s also too young to consciously suppress any desire to investigate the matter like his mother. He is a child after all and is naturally curious. But his first encounter with the ghost was the one that resulted in a near fatal seizure. This can be his body’s reaction to the life-threatening figure of a ghost. The ghost isn’t just a threat to his mortal life, but his wealth, some may argue that these are the same. Mrs. Park pays for therapy for his “trauma” so he could forget the event, but he still knows. He saw this ghost and is the only one to seriously consider its threat. Mrs. Park knows it's real but chooses to not think about it. I want to return to the Manifesto. Let's hear these famous words: “A specter is haunting Europe- the specter of communism… Two things result from this fact: Communism is already acknowledged by all European powers itself to be a power...” (Marx and Engels, 8). Don’t think I’m just including this because he’s talking about a specter, in fact, I think this story of the ghost is an intentional allusion to the specter of communism. Da-Song represents this figure of the bourgeoisie who is in constant anxiety over the threat of his wealth. When he reappears at his birthday party, he has another seizure. Also, at this time, the family, and all of their guests are witness to the horrors of their wealth and what it's created. This naked, hideous display, this moment of confrontation is a pivotal point in the dialectic. Of course, this murderous moment is not seen as a success to the viewer with Mr. Park, Ki-jung, and Geun-sae dead, Ki-woo presumed to be dead, and Ki-taek missing. This just shows us that the bourgeoisie are their own gravediggers- to again invoke the Manifesto. On a larger scale, this would be the moment of a revolution- but we don’t. Ki-woo survives with Chung-sook and is put on probation. Ki-taek is missing to the police, but Ki-taek realizes that he’s living in the bunker in hiding. Ki-woo declares that he will make enough money to buy the home and free his father. At first, I wondered “why couldn't he just sneak him out of the house when the new owners were asleep?” “Why did he have to buy the home?” As much as I wanted to portray the Kims to be revolutionary figures, Ki-woo has the common fate of most. Instead of usurping power from the bourgeoisie, he believes he can free his dad from the home, by owning the house. Everyone who lives in the basement is stuck there for a reason, because someone is forcing them to stay there. A perfect allegory for the relations of production as I have repeatedly mentioned throughout this text. Ki-woo desires a bourgeois life (as most working-class folk do!) in order to lift his father out of the despair of poverty. He believes the only way he can save his father is to own the home, which could easily be seen as the means of production. A nice touch which I had to look up, was as Ki-woo tells us of his desire to buy the home, a song plays called “546 years”- the amount of time it will take for him to earn enough money. I wish this song title was more obvious for the American viewer. I am not trying to take away from this film by saying that, but for a viewer who knows Korean or the song title, they’ll understand the tragic nature of his dreams. Whereas the American viewers will sympathize with his dreams- as we’ve done with immigrants and “the American Dream” or the bootstrapping mentality of some people. In some way I do think Bong didn’t want an overtly revolutionary ending. I don’t think the average viewer, especially in this day, could handle an ending like that. Not to say that we don't understand class inequality and such. We are not living in, say the 60s/70s where there were Marxist movements all throughout the world. I don’t think we have the conditions for a revolution at this moment, although I do think the mass unemployment and the other severe economic consequences of this virus will radicalize the working class in large numbers, to a degree that we haven't seen in a long time. But to make my point, I feel that we are living in historic political times and we are coming to understand ourselves in a liberating way.  It is my hope that films like Parasite will awaken the revolutionary potential in us all.

Note: I wanted to use Fanon’s theory of violence and diagnosis of colonialism as a violent structure, in relation to capitalist society. I don’t want us to interpret his writings as something that can be isolated from the racial structure of colonialism, but i do think it is a beneficial guide to understanding this film.

Work Cited:

Philcox, Richard, translator. “On Violence.” The Wretched of the Earth, by Frantz Fanon, Grove Press, 2004.

Joon-Ho, Bong, director. Parasite. Barunson E&A, 2019.

Marx, Karl, and Frederick Engels. The Communist Manifesto. International Publishers, 1948.

[troyplaysbass]

We’ll Grow Stronger Making Room and Sharing Space: 2019 In Review

It’s the end of the year and the end of the decade (more on the latter in this post). It’s the time for me to reflect on the year and think too much about lists. Some things will never change.

Music I Worked On This Year

Jeff Schaller and the Long Way Home - “Younger Years” (guitar, recording, mixing, mastering)

Apocalypse Quest - Paradoxes (mixing, mastering)

Sloth Hands - Vacation’s Over (mastering)

Apocalypse Quest - “Mediocre Boys” (recording, mixing, mastering)

Flora Self - “Didn’t See It Coming” (bass, recording, mixing, mastering)

Pelafina - “Blue and Gold” (guitar)

Apocalypse Quest - “CEO Blood” (recording, mixing, mastering)

Apocalypse Quest - ERBA (recording, mixing, mastering)

My Favorite Albums of 2019

I’ve had a one-sentence review of my number one album, Breakup Season by Future Teens, in my head for a few months: If I had heard this when I was seventeen, I might have been a better person. That sounds hyperbolic, but I haven’t been able to shake the idea. I know I could have used this album as a teenager. It’s so honest and introspective about heartbreak and sadness and dealing with those emotions in healthy ways. I’m so happy that a band like Future Teens exists. I’m jealous of the kid that hears Breakup Season this year and connects to it like I connected to The Upsides. Future Teens will be that kid’s first favorite band, the soundtrack to their formative years, their inspirations and role models. I keep likening this album to The Upsides, probably the single most influential album on my past ten years. It feels like a torch-passing at the end of the decade, and it’s all the more apt because I saw Future Teens open for the Wonder Years in October.

The rest of my list feels as varied as my year, spanning genre and scope from emo debuts to the biggest pop artist in the world. As always, I think there’s a lot to love on this list, so pick something and give it a spin.

Future Teens - Breakup Season

Charly Bliss - Young Enough

Pedro the Lion - Phoenix

The Menzingers - Hello Exile

The Mountain Goats - In League With Dragons

Jimmy Eat World - Surviving

Taylor Swift - Lover

Origami Angel - Somewhere City

The Get Up Kids - Problems

Telethon - Hard Pop

Proper. - I Spent the Winter Writing Songs About Getting Better

Aaron West and the Roaring Twenties - Routine Maintenance

Ceres - We Are a Team

Oso Oso - Basking In the Glow

Better Oblivion Community Center - Better Oblivion Community Center

The Dangerous Summer - Mother Nature

Somos - Prison On a Hill

Dave Hause - Kick

American Football - LP3

Bruce Springsteen - Western Stars

Junius Paul - Ism

The Maine - You Are OK

Nervus - Tough Crowd

Great Grandpa - Four of Arrows

Vampire Weekend - Father of the Bride

My Favorite EPs of 2019

Better Love - All I Ever Wanted Is To Be Where You Are

Mineral - One Day When We Are Young

Ruston Kelly - Dirt Emo, Volume 1

Rat Tally - When You Wake Up

Bosley Jr - No More

My Favorite Songs of 2019

Here’s a playlist on Apple Music and Spotify of songs I loved this year. It’s vaguely in order (at least the top ten or so).

My Favorite Shows of 2019

I went to 63 shows this year, 35 of which I played. Here were my favorites. These were all great, but the John K. Samson show is a contender for my all-time favorite performance. He doesn’t tour much, so make it a priority to see him if you have the chance.

John K. Samson and Christine Fellows - 11/23 at Beat Kitchen

The Wonder Years, Future Teens - 10/20 at Metro

Ruston Kelly - 11/1 at Thalia Hall

Mineral - 1/24 at Lincoln Hall

Pedro the Lion - 5/18 at The Castle Theater

Jacob Sigman, Jetty Bones - 3/29 at Beat Kitchen

The Sidekicks, Adult Mom - 7/7 at Subterranean

Spanish Love Songs - 5/19 at Cobra Lounge

Los Campesinos! - 7/6 at West Fest

We Were Promised Jetpacks - 7/13 at Bottom Lounge

My Favorite Podcasts of 2019

Two Headed Girl is the best new podcast I listened to this year. It’s a chronicle of gender dysphoria, transitioning, and marriage. Hosts Alex and Matthew Cox are unflinching in their honesty with each other about their lives, health, and feelings. It’s kind of amazing that they recorded all of this and are willing to share such a personal journey with the world.

Elsewhere in the podcast world, two of my favorite long-running podcasts hit new highs in 2019. On episode 102 of Reconcilable Differences, “Preparing the Way,” John Siracusa buys a refrigerator. The two-hour chronicle of this harrowing adventure is everything I love about the podcast format. And The Watch, Chris Ryan and Andy Greenwald’s twice weekly talk about movies and TV, transitioned from purely critique to a behind the scenes look at making a TV show as Andy called in from the set and editing room of his upcoming show, Briarpatch.

Finally, I’ll recommend Michael Lewis’s Against the Rules, a meticulously researched exploration of societal rules and the people who make and enforce them. Unlike the long-running conversational shows I typically like, the tight format and high production value make Against the Rules feel more like an audio book.

My Favorite Books of 2019

As usual, I read very few new releases this year, but the few I did read were fantastic: Hanif Abdurraqib’s latest poetry collection, A Fortune For Your Disaster, Mark Z. Danielewski’s children’s book for all ages, The Little Blue Kite, and Mischa Pearlman’s One Day When We Are Young, a retrospective on the emo band Mineral and a companion piece to their first new music in over twenty years.

The best book I read this year, regardless of release date, was The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver.

My Favorite Television of 2019

I started 2019 with the vague goal of “keeping up” with TV, but I quickly realized that’s impossible. There’s just too much great TV. With that in mind, I just want to highlight a few of my favorite shows of the year, all remarkable for very different reasons, which also happen to be short and digestible.

Fleabag - Season 2

A tour de force of emotion and energy, every episode left me thinking that writer / producer / star Phoebe Waller-Bridge might be the most talented person alive.

Watchmen

Every frame of this show is immaculate. I’m a longtime defender of the endings of Lost and The Leftovers so I had confidence in Damon Lindelof and his team to pull this sequel/remix, and my expectations were still far exceeded.

When They See Us

Ava Duvernay’s docu-drama about the Central Park Five is a heart-wrenching examination of injustice. The opening sequence alone is worth the price of a Netflix subscription.

Chernobyl

A different kind of bleak docu-drama, set on the opposite side of the world as When They See Us, Chernobyl is equal parts moving, gruesome, frustrating, and deeply sad.

And I can’t leave the TV section without giving a shout to Baby Yoda on The Mandalorian, constant cause of delighted squeals (both Liesi’s and mine) every time he’s on screen.

My Favorite Movies of 2019

As always, I'm very behind on movies at the end of year, but Knives Out is a masterpiece. 1. Knives Out 2. Marriage Story 3. The Irishman 4. Booksmart 5. Midsommar 6. The Report 7. Toy Story 4 8. Us 9. Dolemite Is My Name 10. High Life

Next Year

I haven’t made a formal new year’s resolution in quite a few years, but I do have some plans for 2020.

Pelafina will be releasing a new EP in the next couple months. More on that very soon.

The Long Way Home are deep in the process of recording our next album. That will hopefully be out later in the spring.

I didn’t make a single blog post this year, and I want to change that. I don’t have a clear structure in mind, but I just want to write more.

I’m going to listen to more jazz.

[calliecat93]

Top 5 Things I Disliked About RWBY Volume 1

(Top 5 Likes)

Welcome to the first installment of this little series of mine! So with Red vs Blue, I’ve done these ‘Top 5 Things I Like/Dislike/ posts regarding the recent seasons. So I thought ‘well, why not do it for RWBY to lead-up to Volume 7′! Sure, I thought of it at the last second and have to do two posts a day in order to be done by Saturday, but hey! it gives me something to do, so yay!

Anyways, here’s how these works. I’m going to release two posts a day. One for dislikes, one for likes. I want to say this about Dislike sin particular. As far as Volumes 1-5 go, the dislikes are things that I find weak about the volumes, but are NOT relevant to where RWBY is now. Volume 6 will have my relevant issues, but that’s about it. These are also gonna be nitpicky cause honestly, I have very few things that I dislike about each volume. Yes, including V5. Anything I bring up here I’ll do my best to explain, and same with Likes though obviously that’s gonna be more positive/happy. Dislikes are gonna be first cause I wanna get them out of the way.

Okay! Let's do this!

#5 - Chapter Runtimes

As of now, we RWBY fans are used to chapters bing about... 12-15 minutes on average, and longer than that on certain occasions. If it goes past 20 minutes, then we know that it’s a biiiig deal. Volume 1 though was... bizarre. Aside from Chapters 1, 8, 15, and 16 they ranged from about 6-8 minutes. Sometimes even four minutes. Now, this may not seem like that big a deal, especially since it is Volume 1 so they were still figuring the show out. So there's no reason to harp on them... but it is still an issue for this volume in particular and while I came into it after all the chapters were out and was able to just binge it in one go, it was a frequent complaint that I saw regarding it.

The issue is that many of the episodes would end up being two-parters when may of them would just be one episode nowadays. I’m gonna get to the Jaune Arc in another section, so let's take say... The Badge and the Burden for example. It’s a two-parter that I really like... but Part One is five and a half minutes, and Part 2 is seven minutes. Combined, they equal a total of around 12 1/2 minutes, reaching the current standard. I really feel that this could have improved pacing, especially for the Jaune arc since if it only went two episodes, IDT it would have annoyed as many people as it did. If you combined all the two-parters, V1 would ave a total of ten episodes. Now I assume that the episode order would have been cut down, so if they went with 12 then that gives them two episodes to do more things like showing more of Team RWBY growing as a team, showing more of how Beacon works, setting up things like Weiss’ racism towards Faunus and Blake’s Faunus status, etc. 

As I said though, this was the first volume. I think that they were trying to go with how they did Red vs Blue episodes since that was what they knew, and that format just didn’t work for RWBY. It was a critique that they listened to, and fixed accordingly in V2 and beyond. They were still finding their feet with the show and nowadays since you can just binge the volume, any pacing issues aren’t as big a deal. But I do feel like some things could have been better established or fleshed out had they gone with the current format here, so it is still something about the volume that I don’t care for. But it is certianly not an issue anymore.

#4 - Length of the Jaune Arc... Arc

Oh Jaune, the shit that you got for these four episodes...

So in V1, there are these two parts titled Jaunedice and Forever Fall. In it, Jaune is being bullied and struggling in his classes. Pyrrha offers to help, but Jaune refuses and we find out hat he cheated his way into Beacon. Cardin finds out, blackmails him, Jaune grows a backbone, Grimm fight, and Jaune finally accepts Pyrrha’s help. It’s more than that. We have Jaune opening up about how worthless he feels and how he hates being the Butt-Monkey that he had been made as over the course of the volume. He’s doubtful of his role as a leader, with Ruby giving him encouragement that later helps him stand up to Cardin. We see how caring Pyrrha is as she tries to convince Jaune to let her help him, how disappointed she is when he rejects her, and her using her power to help Jaune and give him a confidence boost. It’s a good story that especially helps with the bond between Jaune and Pyrrha and without this plot, the things that happen later wouldn’t have been nearly as impactful, especially during V3.

That being said, however, the issue here is that it’s four episodes long. In a 16 episode season where the runtime for each was under ten minutes. That meant that four weeks straight, instead of focusing on the actual main characters of having cool fights, people spent essnetially a month watching this ‘Jaune gets bullied’ storyline. Now I want to make this clear, I love Jaune. He's one of my favorite characters and I think that him hating being a fool and wanting to be a hero but having this kinda macho mindset about it makes him an interesting character. They subvert the ‘loser hero who becomes greater than everyone’ cliche by having Jaune have to man up, but he doesn't ever really become this ultra-badass hero. He has to learn to accept help and pays consequences for cheating his way into Beacon by having to actually work to prove his worth. 

Jaune had a very good character arc here... it’s just that the season’s structure makes it feel like he took the spotlight from other characters, especially Team RWBY. It being kind of a standard bullying story that isn’t out of place in any teen drama also didn’ make it very interesting, it just sets up more interesting things in later volumed. Even the Grimm fight at the end, compared to every other fight this volume, isn’t all that great and only serves to both reveal Pyrrha’s Semblance and to end the Cardin conflict. Had this been in the current format and just two episodes, it probably wouldn’t have annoyed as many people. ut as such, it’s just kinda... meh compared to the high fantasy that we get later and maybe gave aune a little too much attention. They do a much better job of giving Jaune time when prominent, but not letting it override other characters. But I will stills ay the arc is good character stuff for Jaune and Pyrrha, sets up Jaune training to become better, shows Pyrrha’s selfless nature, and without it, anything that happened later wouldn't have been nearly as impactful. So I don’t hate it, but it ain’t perfect.

#3 - Cardin Sucks

Okay, this is gonna be brief, but Cardin sucks. Okay yeah, I know that he’s supposed to suck, but he’s just... a bad character. He is a one-dimensional bully who exists solely to make Jaune miserable. After this arc, he has no prominence and in side stories like the manga or comics, they only use him to have a hate sink against other characters. He’s boring. He has no reason to be an asshole. We know nothing about him or why he’s that way. Which makes him utterly uninteresting, especially compared to later villains. Like say what you want about CInder or Adam, but at least they have actual motivations and impact. And it looks especially lame when you have Roman in this volume, who is one of the most beloved villains from the show because of how charismatic and fun he is. 

Sure Cardin's not supposed to be this great villain nor do I want him to be, and yes sucky people who suck just because are a thing. But Cardin just exists for the Jaune Arc... arc, which really with a couple of adjustments you could write him out completely. Like did we really need to have Jaune get blackmailed to make his arc work? There is nothing interesting about Cardin’s character. he’s just... a bully, and that’s it. I get it, he's made to be a hateful bully, but it also makes him a poor character and I just want him to vanish form all material because he’s not good for anything really.

#2 - Penny Fight

Let's get this out of the way before I say anything else. Monty was an incredibly talented animator who clearly had a love for his work and was incredibly creative and passionate. His fights were always amazing, this one included, and he gave us a show that I have loved for several years now. Even now, he is greatly missed but will always be remembered as an amazing animator, and as an amazing person. That being said though, Monty was not perfect and I think that this moment from the finale shows that sometimes he let his love for cool action scenes go too far.

Monty sometimes had a bad habit of making the characters more powerful than they really should be. This could look bad in stories where the characters would lose fights and people would get upset due to it. Like with how Adam was made out to be this badass... and we’ve ALL seen how people keep trying to use that argument for how Miles and Kerry ruined him, even though they didn’t. Then we have things like Penny. Now originally, Miles didn’t want the Penny Robot reveal to happen until V2. Now admittedly he and Kerry... kinda made it obvious that enny was at least not normal during her intro so everyone pretty much figured it out by the finale, but still, there was room for speculation. But Monty decided that he wanted a badass action sequence with Penny... and in doing so it gave the reveal away. And apparently, no one bothered to inform Miles and you can tell on the V1 Commentary that he was pretty surprised to see the sequence.

Monty was a great animator and he created a fantastic world. But like anyone, he had his flaws. I’m still annoyed at how that fight, as cool as it looked, gave the reveal away and went against the writer’s intention. I do not like it when stories get messed with just for coolness, and this is a prime example. IDT it annoyed people as much as the V2 finale where Monty definitely went overboard with cool action scenes. but this is still very much an example of the problems with doing that. V1 still is my least favorite finale for this and one other reason that we’ll go into in a bit. It’s not a big deal now and again, most people already figured the twist out due to the lack of subtlety. But it still pretty much ruined any build-up that it could have had, and that is a shame. Nevertheless, it was a very badass sequence by Monty and shows off just how crazy talented that the man truly was. Monty was a mad genius, and his memory still goes on even today. So for that, I can give it a little bit of slack.

I cannot give a much slack for Number One though...

#1. Weiss at the end Black and White was poorly done

To be honest, The Stray and Black and White is... not a strong finale. Yes, it brings up the Faunus oppression and introduced the White Fang as well as Sun. But the Faunus stuff had very little build-up. Sure, we had Cardin bullying Velvet... but it was Cardin, who bullied everyone so not a great example. Wiss worked better as, why this was her bitch phase, he wasn't a bad person and we saw her kinder side earlier. Plus she had a reason that wasn’t just racism and helped build-up to her problematic family life. But I find it hard to believe that Weiss hadn’t been showing her anti-Fuanus stances before The Stray, which is what it felt like so I feel like a better job could have been done regarding her.

Then we get to the ending of Black and White, and it feels... forced. Really forced. At the end, Weiss suddenly did a 180, telling Blake that she doesn't care that Blake is a Faunus, asks Blake to open up to her team more, and tries to hold back on any derogatory terms against Sun. It’s nice to see Weiss trying to be better, and later volumes very much show how much that she’s improved... but there is no build-up to her reaching this epiphany. Sure Ruby and Yang call her out on how horrible she’s acting towards Blake... but that was before they knew that she was a Faunus with Penny having to spell it out for them. Yeah, Yang makes a snide remark towards Weiss later about Weiss not caring which Weiss rebukes... but that’s it. We don’t see Weiss learn anything or see her view shift whatsoever over the course of these two episodes. I guess you can argue that the revelation is what made Weiss reconsider... but since she was calling Blake a criminal before the revelation, it kinda makes it hard for me to believe that. I guess it was meant to be implied, but even when I watched it the first time, I was baffled by it.

It just kinda cheapens the ending when Weiss did a 180 out of nowhere. Now Om glad that she had the revelation. As I said, later volumes show that she meant in with V2 having her stop Blake from closing up in Chapter 2 and get her to open up to them. V3 has her defend Velvet, a Faunus, and shows concern for her safety. V6 had her get pissed at Cordovin when she made a racist motion at Blake with murder clearly in her eyes. And I expect that V7 is going to show us more of this. it’s also clear that Weiss’ racism was due to a hateful mindset that she was raised into that she knows is wrong and had to grow out of. So I can see Weiss growing out of it in the finale and am happy for what we see later... but we don’t see her start to break out of it here. She says that she had 12 hours to think about it... and we’re just supposed to assume that she came to the conclusion because we were told that it happened. ‘Show don’t tell’ has been a frequent critique of the show, and sadly this is one of the best examples. Maybe if we saw Ruby and Yang call Weiss out after the Faunus revelation or saw Blake and Weiss interacting before Weiss’ racism became known it would have worked, but... no. We don’t. Again, it’s V1 so it’s not gonna be perfect and we do see that Weiss was genuine. I just wish that they did a better job of letting us experience that growth with her.

________________________________________________________________

Okay, Dislikes are done. Again, many if not all of these are no longer relevant to where RWBY is now. It’s just a little trip down memory lane. If anything, it really shows how much that everyone has improved over the years, which is a great thing. The good news is that now we can focus on the good things for VOlume 1. That post will go up later today... after I sleep. So thank you all for reading, and be on the lookout for the Top 5 Things I Liked About RWBY Volume 1~!