#also like okay the WHOLE song doesn't apply just most of it-- but out of the most of it I'd wanna like. pull specific lines

[thedivinetarot]

I'm your man, I'm your man, if you're feeling lonely, I'll be the one

The personality of your next lover

☆ How to chose the perfect pile for you?

Close your eyes, take a deep breathe, clear your mind and ask the question in your head "who is my next lover?". And open your eyes, and the image that your eye is drawn to the most is your pile.

☆ Don't miss this month's offer read here ♧♧♧ for more information DM me💕.

☆ Who is this reading for?

Obviously single people but if you are in a place where you broke up I advice you to heal instead of wasting your time on this reading.

☆ Note:

I felt very called to do this reading. And for the spicy one it turned out to be so long that I had to do each pile in a different day. Anyways, also; this reading can be applied on your future spouse or just a future lover.

Enjoy Angels💕

Pile 1 - Aphrodite

Current energy:

Hello pile 1, how are you? I hope you are fine (you can skip the energy check if it didn't resonate with you, I just made it to make sure that the reading will be as accurate as possible).

Okay let's start. First I felt sick all of sudden, some people here are sick and have tonsillitis or cold (take what resonates). I see that the past few days you were trying to find balance in practical matters which led you to abandon your health and you fell ill. I felt suffocated all of sudden you either have a respiratory problem or you are carrying too much emotional burdens on your shoulders which is making you feel weighted down. I see disappointment, and recovery. This pile’s energy is straight forward, like even the Lenormand affirmed your energy that is been told by tarot. I see that some people here are waiting for communication, perhaps a job offer and now you are waiting but something here feels vague. Maybe you don't know if you'll be accepted or not. I see hesitation from your part. Like you are not 100% sure what you want. You are just slowing down and going about your day nothing much. I see that others in this pile have gone through a lot of things, someone here had to stand out in the face of a fire sign female in your family. I see that you put boundaries with her because she just annoyed you. Others here are being manipulated by someone, I see that this person is not saying the whole truth. Or maybe you are the one who is fooling yourself to avoid the transformation. I see that you want to move on and embrace the shift but something is holding you back. It feels like the lyric from Lana's song "I want to leave, probably I'll stay another year" you want the shift but some things here are being hidden from you. Or tbh being ignored by you. I see that if you are waiting for communication you'll likely receive a very positive response but the thing that you aimed for won't come easily. Let's see your placements:

Sagittarius, Virgo, Gemini, Cancer. Saturn, Venus, moon dominant. Your sun or moon in the 9th, 6th, 3rd, 4th house in your chart.

☆ Who?

This person is working in a field that requires collaboration, perhaps working within a community. I don't see that they are super independent in their job; I see that they are a part of something, a project or collaboration. I see also that this person is overthinker, they thinks a lot and tend to be indecisive about their path. I see that they might got into their work as something that one day will be left by them but they got stuck and now this person doesn't want to leave because they are indecisive. This person at first seems very cold, structured and emotionally distant but once they warm up to you they are literally the sweetest baby ever. I see someone that is balanced emotionally. Have you talked to them online? Because what I'm getting is that this person either knows you online OR you'll get to know them online. But I'm getting someone familiar, like you may have came across their account, liked a post or something and they replied to you or the opposite thing happened. I see that this person tend to manipulate others but not for negative or ill intentions, they might do this unintentionally which make others run away from them. This person have a very strong moral code, their morals are as strong as rocks. Also, I see that they are quite fair and balanced. They give off libra energy. This person is very balanced in the way they talk and take action. They'll be very loyal to you and won't cheat on you. I'm getting IXFJ vibe so they might be an INFJ or ISFJ. This relationship might start out as friendship or something platonic and it'll progress into something very peaceful. What really shocking me is how much this person had faced difficulties and all of them are related to their work. So maybe their work environment is hard or they are very uncomfortable in their work? Maybe. Now let's see their placements:

Capricorn, Gemini, Scorpio, Libra. And for a very little group here this person is Aquarius. They might have venus or sun in Scorpio, Gemini placements or dominant in their chart. They might have sun or moon in the 10th, 3rd, 8th, 7th and 11th house.

☆ Appearance?

Okay, I see that this person look very tired or defeated. I see that their posture look droppy. A little hunch in their back but nothing too serious. Their posture just doesn't look very straight. Also, This person is literally or metaphorically have larger-than-life appearance. They might have prominent forehead and sharp eyes or jawline. I see also that they look very childish or younger than their actual age. I see that their smile is very beautiful and they look charming. This person is literally so graceful especially in the way they dress. I see also that they look like a book lover or a nerd. I see that this person is very confident in their physical appearance and is not really into trendy stuff, but I see a hint of showing off their style. They like to show off and brag about what they have which make people very envious of them. This person's hair is weavy or curly. I'm not seeing anything straight to be honest. Their hair is brown with blonde hues to it. This person look stable especially in the way they walk. I see that people just fall for the way they carry themselves. Elegantly; what I'm seeing. This person is very polite, they don't like to raise their voice. Round or soft features with sharp eyes or almond eyes. Their height is average not too tall or short. This person is known by a lot of people, I started smelling onion omg (no its not their scent it may be that they love eating green fresh onion) this is strange lol. Also, they are very fit but not sporty. Someone who work out to stay fit but not overly mascular or yk not typical gym bro/ girl vibe. They may have deep voice? In the case of a male they have a deep satisfying voice. Also, you'll meet this person very soon, they might reach out or communicate with you. That's all I have for you pile 1, I hope you meet them one day💕.

Pile 2 - Venus

Your current energy:

(This is a general energy check; take what resonates and leave what doesn't and if you feel like my energy check doesn't resonates with you then skip to the reading directly. Thank you for reading this note🤍 let's get into it). So, I'm picking up on a couple of energies here. First I see that there's someone here who might have been trying to have a child or have infertility issues, someone here is young and infertile I see that you might indeed succeed to have a baby but you need to stay resilient. Other's here are being so hard on themselves, someone here is trying to be more healthy but they do not know how to start and where. I see also that for the rest of you there's a settle down with a lover or a partner. If you are looking for a sign to settle down with your current partner then that's your sign. I see also that for my single people that love is within reach. I got the cards of love and luck. Someone will be in your life soon and you'll settle with them in a house together. I see also that there's someone here who is being indecisive about a project and you might want to see if the people you are working with are worthy of trust or not. Now, for others there's someone who has a crush on you and you are not even aware of lol. Now let's see your placements: (take it as extra confirmation)

Leo, Taurus, sagittarius, Cancer, Libra, Capricorn. Also we have saturn, Jupiter, Venus, moon dominant in your chart. Sun or moon in the 5th, 2nd, 9th, 4th, 7th, 10th house in your chart. Also, I feel a strong moon in sagittarius, Venus in taurus, Saturn in libra and sun in taurus.

☆Who?

Okay, first thing I'm picking up on is that this person look demanding and confident. Someone with a strong masculine energy; even if this is a girl here; she doesn't fuck around, girl boss vibe and if this is a man, this person is very strong and assertive. I got 3 pages for you so I guess this person is not that old they might be in high school or college. And even if they are not in those then they have a strong young vibe. This person is very curious about you, I see that they might be looking for you. This person's energy is very familiar like you know them. And no this is not an Ex so please get it out of your head. Anyways; you know this person and if you know no one then keep reading about the personality. They are looking for you, If you are not attending classes then they are realizing that you are not there anymore. Idk why I typed the previous paragraph but let's get to their personality. I see that this person may have everything you dream of in a person. This person have a sharp mind and an optimistic personality. They are very smart and rich btw. I see that they have their own business or they are working on their own life right now. Someone who is still young, doesn't have resources and they still take money from their family lol. And if they are not then they just have inherited the money from the family which make them wealthy. Anyways, this person is curious about where did you disappear and want to communicate with you. I see a written letter or text from them, but they are very conflicted whether to send it or not. I see that this person has been very loyal to you and want to work with you and spoil you. I'm not sure about thir intentions but this person is thinking of you sensually. They crave you? Yes they do. Let's get back to their personality (mf each time I try to talk about their personality they bring me back to what they want from you aghhh). Anyways; this person is very demure lol, I keep laughing they are a jester, they like to make fun or things and make people laugh. I felt the urge to laugh about their silliness. This person is silly too and have the best inner jokes. Also, they are quite adventurous and come from a very respected and high class family. Let's get to their placements:

Aries, Aquarius, sagittarius, virgo, Capricorn, Taurus, Pisces. Mars, Saturn, mercury dominant in their chart. 1st, 11th, 9th, 6th, 10th, 2nd, 12th house placements in their chart or their moon and sun is these houses.

☆ Appearance:

We got a lot of cups so, this person has a fair almost pale skin, bluish green eyes, and light brown hair. This person's look might not be what you usually go for in a guy. Also for others here this person has a black weavy hair with tan kissed skin. This person(the first one) is a little overweight but they are in a good health. They might be working out and they have a strong biceps. For the second one their physique is tall and strong, good health but they look so HOT omg. For the first one (the pale guy or girl) they are quite attractive and beautiful. Someone here is hot (the tall, tan person) and the other (pale guy or girl) is attractive and beautiful. There's a note here; you might be feeling disappointed because you haven't met your person yet but the universe want you to know that no matter how far or ambiguous it looks right now it is within reach for you. A soulmate connection, that is within the reach. Thank you for reading and sorry because this one kind of short. Lots of love and peace💕🙏🏼.

Pile 3 - Kiss marks

Your current energy:

Hey pile 3, how are you? I hope you are doing well. Okay let's get into the energy check but first I'll leave a note here *** This is a general energy check so if you feel like none of it resonated with you then skip to the next portion of the reading. And if it did resonate then take it asa confirmation***. I do a tailored readings so feel free to check my Masterlist for this month's offer.

Okay, wow this is a mixed bag here. I see many energies in this pile. People here are trying to work on their self-esteem. Other's are trying to get over a friendship fallout. And someone people here actually dating someone that you meet through friends. I see other's here are thinking about money and how to maximize their earrings which is quite good because it'll happen to you. Also, some people here are doing charity or social work. I see that for thus group within this pile you'll get a gift or a certificate because of your hard work and dedication. Some people here are attached to a long-term relationship that they invested in emotionally while other's are trying to fix that relationship. I see someone here who is attached to someone else and the relationship in a courtship state with a lover I see that people in your family are not approving your relationship with your person. Someone here are trying to heal from a past ex who caused them a lot of pain and confusion. Maybe they were a narcissist that's what the cards are showing me. Okay, another thing I see is that someone here was in a long-term relationship that was so serious but something here was off so you had to break the engagement because the groom or the person who was with you was in fact an abusive person. This person might have afforded material things to you or was financially very comfortable or have money but you broke it with them because their actions was so abusive towards you. Now you are trying to heal and move on with your life. That's what I'm seeing. I hope I didn't trigger anyone with this. I'm so sorry for whoever going through this, you are strong and worthy of good things dear💕.

Placements for you:

Aries, Leo, Scorpio, Gemini, Virgo, Aquarius. Dominant planets in Venus, Jupiter, Mercury and Mars. Sun or moon in the 1st, 5th, 8th, 3rd, 6th, 11th house in your chart.

☆ Who?

Okay, I see that this person is very chill and fair. They don't like to see injustice or other people bullying or hating on one another. They are very much calm and collected. A little bit extroverted, they have lots of friends but they don't really reveal themselves to other's quickly. They take their time to get to know people. They might had a very difficult period with insomnia but they have healed from it rn. I see that their mental health got better and they went to psychiatrist or healed by themselves. I see that this person tend to ignore their own self to help other people. They are slow and steady, they talk slowly, calmly and they enjoy finer things. They might have father issues, because I see that they had a very difficult father. Their father was strict and sharp. Their father had a tendency to compete with them or compared them constantly to someone else. I see also that you manifested this person lol. I asked how will you meet them, the answer was all of sudden and you'll be the one who manifested them into your life. I see also that you might meet them through a male friend or someone with masculine energy or they will be the one who talk to you. This person is someone you dreamed, prayed and hoped that you meet. I see that this person is someone who had gone through a lot of transformation, especially their social circle. They might used to talk or befriend anyone which affected their mental health and self-esteem terribly. Now their placements:

Libra, Pisces, Gemini, Taurus, virgo, Cancer, Dominant planets in Venus, Jupiter, Mercury, moon. Sun or moon in the 7th, 12th, 3rd, 2nd, 6th, 4th house in their chart.

☆ Physical appearance:

This person might have a calm and reflective nature, with a soft or ethereal appearance, perhaps with pale skin. They could give off a dreamy, mysterious vibe, and there's likely an intellectual edge to their look, maybe wearing glasses or dressing in a more thoughtful, reserved style. Physically, they could be athletic and toned, with a sharp or defined build. They likely have radiant skin, maybe tanned or glowing, and carry an energetic, positive charisma that draws people in. Their presence would be youthful, with a playful and charming demeanor, possibly accentuated by an engaging smile and an easy, carefree attitude. Based on the overall vibe, this person is likely of average to above-average height, as they carry a balanced presence, radiant yet grounded. Their physique would likely be toned and athletic, with a strong build that shows energy and movement. While they might not be overly muscular, they would have a defined, active appearance that reflects both physical and intellectual vitality. Their energy is noticeable, and they might carry themselves with a sense of confidence and vitality that complements their more reflective and intellectual sides.

Pile 4 - Aphrodite smile

Your current energy:

Hello pile 4, I hope you are doing well🤍. I'll put a note here before starting your reading *** This is a general energy check, so please take what resonates and leave what doesn't. Also, if you feel like the energy check doesn't resonate with you skip to the next portion you don't have to continue***.

Okay, I felt like I'm on a cruise, I feel the waves up and down, like this feeling you get when you are on the board of a ship or cruise. But anyways; also this pile is definitely not for singles most of the energies I'm getting are for people who are already in a relationship or at least dating and want to know if the person you are with is serious or not. I got it hon, you want that person but since this is a general reading I have more tailored one for you, check this month's offer and I'll be more than glade to guide you. Okay, I see that you have a strong emotional connection to a romantic partner. This person make your heart beat so fast. I see that this relationship is a harmonious one which is so nice and peaceful but don't let possessiveness and self doubt to destroy the relationship. People within this pile have self destructive tendencies, like you don't believe that something good is going to happen for you which unfortunately sabotage possible romantic connection that might develop with time. I see that you are thinking here of two things 1) to develop and take things seriously + further; to commitment. 2) end things that might be potential for your growth. Please chose wisely, because the person you are with is definitely a soulmate. I don't see any unhealthy patterns here at all (pls use your own discernment this is a general reading). Even the person you are with appears to be confident, have a very high self-esteem and generous. I see that this relationship have endured many challenges but it kept on because you guys are with each other and love one another. Placements for you:

Sagittarius, Gemini, Capricorn, Leo, Cancer, dominant planets in your chart: moon, Mercury, Saturn, jupiter. Your sun or moon in the 9th, 3rd, 10th, 5th, 4th house.

☆Who?

(Note that this reading for my single people and if you are reading it for someone you are already with it might not resonate with you so use your own discernment okay?).

Well, this is someone you don't really want to know. Their energy is not so good actually. I'll guide you to know how you'll prevent this from happening so take this reading as guidance on how to ignore and not take them seriously. Anyways, this person is lazy, have no ambition and doesn't know how to invest long-term. They lack foresight and imagination. They are someone who is chronically lier. They show personality that is not them. There's a car started to peep under my window so take it as a warning, I screamed okay I got it and the peeping stopped so ig those are your spirit guides warning you from them. Let's continue, this person knows how to manipulate others emotionally, they know how to flip tables and probably they'll put you as an option and won't really give you what you hope for. This person has a very poor attitude towards women or females, they like to treat other's as objects. They look at someone but instead of seeing long-term future they see what they can get from you. Don't try to chase them, if they show you poor attitude or manipulation you can turn around and leave. Don't try to prove they are wrong, don't try to prove to them that you are worthy because their brain is not designed to see worthiness. They only see what they can get. Can be harsh and aggressive sometimes, they might even curse or not use safe words at all. How will meet them? I see that you'll be the one who meet them first or a significant female in your life will set you up with them. I see that if the first scenario doesn't happen; you might know them while you are dealing or communicating with someone about stolen things and this person will get in to attempt and help you. That's what I'm seeing. Now for their placements:

Virgo, Taurus, Pisces, Gemini, Cancer, dominant planets in moon, Saturn and Mars. Sun or moon in the 6th, 2nd, 12th, 3rd, 4th house in their chart.

☆ Physical appearance:

Okay I see that this person have soft, striking eyes that draw attention, with a gentle and calm gaze. Their eye color might be light, such as hazel, green, blue, or gray. Their hair is dark, possibly black or deep brown, and smooth in texture sleek, straight, or neatly styled. They are of average to tall height, with a solid and well-proportioned build, perhaps broad-shouldered or sturdy in appearance. Their features are refined, with a sharp, defined jawline or cheekbones, giving them an air of elegance and grace. Overall, they have a balanced combination of strength and refinement, exuding a calm yet engaging presence. That's all I have for you pile 4, take care and be gentle with yourself 💕 and sorry if I triggered you or anything and remember that this is only a possibility in the near future and not something that might definitely happen for you🤍.

Post date:27th of Jan - 2025 Mon

* Feedback is appreciated*

[moon-ttokki-x]

Your fic about safe is so amazing I'm inlove with it?? Could you do a similar one but with daddy issues like you're dating Han or Chris (idm which you pick) and you sometimes worry he'll leave you + Ur own issues, tw? Bipolar and depression? Whatever makes you comfortable to do at least

aha thank you so much ! i just titled this one 'depressed reader' but all of the main details are in the descriptions below >< also i couldn't decide between writing chan or han so i just kind of wrote both lol . . . hopefully this one brings you some comfort too, anon <3

hold me - bang chan x depressed!reader

pairing: bang chan x depressed!reader

summary: watching chan with one of his members makes everything you've felt lately rise to the surface.

genre: fluff, idol! au, comfort at the end, depression, hinting to bipolar disorder, heavy descriptions of relationship issues (i made it sort of vague so it applies to a lot of scenarios), descriptions of ed, deprecating and negative thoughts, breakdowns, attachment issues, chan is the sweetest most understanding person in the whole world, jisung is mentioned multiple times in this fic

a/n: sending love to all my readers ! you are all soso appreciated <3. divider from @ianrkives

You hesitantly open the door to the studio after knocking twice. When there's no reply, you quickly step inside and blink. The room is pretty much dark, the only source of light coming from a dim standing lamp in the corner.

Chan is seated at his desk, hunched over the soundboard, with a pair of headphones clasping either side of his head. You can barely see him in the dark, only his face, hands, and the column of his throat visible out of the baggy black clothes he always likes to wear.

He doesn't look up as you enter and then quietly shut the door, too focused on the wavy, lilting lines and sequences of the song production software in front of him. You sigh softly and walk up to him, coming from the side so you don't startle him. Placing your bag down on the small table before the sofa, you place a couple of hesitant fingers on the arm of his chair.

"Channie?" You say quietly.

He's still squinting at the screen, somehow so focused he doesn't even see you right next to him. Or maybe it's the light from the screen; when you stare at a device for so long in the dark, it gets difficult to see anything else.

But he suddenly seems to sense your movement, and he must have realised it was you, because he wraps an arm around your waist and gently pulls you closer.

"Hi, baby," he murmurs, not taking his eyes off the screen. His gaze is focused and almost intense as he scrutinizes every soundbar and beat of the music. You bite your lip.

You begin to worry a little then; have you disturbed him from his work? Maybe you shouldn't have come, or at least sent him a text telling him you were coming to the company studio. Maybe he would be more comfortable if you just left him alone.

Before your thoughts can descend on your head like a static black cloud, Chan finally slips off his headphones, leaning back in his chair with a heavy exhale. His arm is still around your waist and so he tugs you with him a little bit, eyes roaming over your face as he stretches.

"Sorry," he says, sighing contentedly as his back pops a little. "Got so caught up, didn't realise I'd be here so late."

"It's okay," you say quietly. "I figured."

Chan catches the hint of sadness creeping into your tone and he pulls you onto his lap, coiling strong arms around your torso. His unruly, ruffled curls tickle the naps of your neck and you squirm, letting out an involuntary giggle. Though the sound is happy, it immediately fills you with a creeping feeling of disgust, and you reproachfully close your mouth.

Chan doesn't seem to notice; he seems rather content to just keep you on his lap. He's absentmindedly singing something, and you stand up off of his lap suddenly, brushing yourself off. For some unknown reason, you begin to feel a bit embarrassed, like you used to feel around Chan when you didn't know him too well.

The man in question sits up a little straighter in his chair, smiling at you. "How was your day, baby?"

"Good," you say a little curtly. You're not sure where the tone is coming from, and you shove the feeling down before you can say something in a way you'd regret.

Chan hums thoughtfully and pokes you lightly in the stomach. "Just good, hmm? Usually I'd get a lot more than that... are you okay?"

"Yes," you say quietly, even though you feel anything but. You're grateful for the darkness then, because it means Chan can't see the tears beginning to prickly hotly at the corners of your eyes. You keep your voice strong and fight the urge to sniffle so as not to alert him. "Just had a long day. You?"

Saying those sentences almost makes you break.

Chan can never know what it's like; how it feels to be brushed off and ignored and attacked by someone who is supposed to love you. To feel like you don't really matter, or that your thoughts and ideas and dreams are just that; useless, empty words inside your head. And to be constantly reminded of how little your worth is, to the point where you're not sure what love is, or what it looks like.

Chan will never understand; he had a completely normal childhood, with a completely normal family and upbringing, and he's normal. Normal in the way that he has people to turn to, people who love and support him, and he's normal in the way that he doesn't scrutinize his own actions every single second of every single day.

And he will never know what it's like to be struggling with something to the point where it all just builds up inside your head like a messy pile of bricks. Where it all weighs down heavy on your mood and sends clouds of dust into the air, distorting and warping your emotions.

So far you've been able to control your mood swings around him; you'd succeeded in making Chan think that you're a person who likes to sleep a lot. In reality you just lie down and keep your eyes and mouth shut so you don't end up acting hypomanic or have outbursts at him. At least it's working; you would much rather keep it all inside than bare the most vulnerable parts of yourself to someone who might decide to turn away and leave you because of it.

You've learnt that keeping those thoughts and emotions inside is better, because then at least people stay. For some time, anyway. Lately you've been feeling like you're biding your time, waiting until the day where Chan finds out everything and decides to do what's best for himself.

When he decides to leave you.

"...And then Han decided he was going to try and do his makeup himself all of a sudden, and of course it was a whole mess. I had to clean sparkly highlighter out of his mouth. I mean, how does that even happen?"

You blink. Chan has been talking this whole time while you've been zoned out of your mind, pitifully burying yourself in your struggles. You climb out of the pit but for a moment and nod along, though he still can't see you because of the dark. You hope that he's just been talking about Han the whole time and not anything else, because if you missed something, Chan will definitely know something's wrong. You inwardly curse yourself for making a habit out of replying to every event and topic that comes out of Chan's mouth.

"Does he not know you guys have perfectly good stylists for that?" You murmur, carding a hand through his fluffy hair.

He sighs exasperatedly, rolling his eyes. "Apparently not."

You feel the slightest hint of mirth warming your heart as you notice the tips of Chan's rough, calloused fingers covered in the faintest hint of sparkles. But it quickly disappears, replaced by a cold, dead numbness that seems to encapsulate your whole being. Like icy water.

"Anyways," Chan stretches again, standing up. "How come you're here and not at home?"

Slightly taken aback at the blunt statement, you stutter a little. Chan's eyes go wide and he shakes his hands frantically in front of himself. "N-not like that! I'm glad you're here, it's just that it's really late and I thought you would be asleep by now..."

You blink at him, and then at the clock. He has a point; the white LEDs on the display read 1:43 am. Normally you'd be passed out in bed at this time.

"Couldn't sleep," you say. "I missed you."

And it's true. You did miss him. But suddenly you're looking straight through Chan to someone else and saying that last sentence to him instead. You clench your fists.

"Aww," Chan whines cutely, pulling you into a hug. "My baby. I missed you too. This new song track is killing me."

You pull back from the hug and kiss him on the cheek, partly because kissing Chan makes him go all red, and if you let him hug you any longer, you'll probably break down.

Chan does go red and you poke him lightly in the side, teasing gently. He chuckles and jerks away as you walk to the low table and pick up a bag. "I brought food."

"Oh, you're the best," Chan dives for the bag and eagerly digs through, clumsily kissing your cheek as he pulls the lid off one of the takeout containers. He sits down on the couch before pulling out a pair of chopsticks from the bag and heaping a mouthful of the food. He groans loudly. "This is so good."

"Tastes better after work, doesn't it?" You sit down next to him and lean back, looking at the ceiling. You cross your arms over your stomach to keep it quiet.

Chan nods eagerly and holds out his chopsticks. "Say ahh, Y/n."

You shake your head ruefully but Chan insists, moving closer. Relenting, you open your mouth and feel the warmth of the food against your tongue. It tastes so good, and for a second, you think about asking for more, but you realise that Chan needs it more. After all, he's been working all night.

Besides, if you ask for more of his food, he might think you're being greedy and look at you that certain way that someone else does.

In disgust.

You know in your heart that Chan would never do these sorts of things, but the doubt nags consistently at your consciousness, tugging your mood one way and then your emotions the next. The constant change between feelings is almost giving you whiplash and you exhale, closing your eyes and leaning back into the couch.

"Baby?"

"Mm," you say without opening your eyes.

"Is everything okay?" You hear him setting down his chopsticks, feel the tiny thud through the table as he sets the already-empty container down gently. Your heart drops to your stomach.

Keep it together. He doesn't know anything.

You sigh and sit up, your heartstrings twinging. "Just a lot to think about lately. Why?"

Chan nods, leaning back into the couch next to you. "It's just that you've been really quiet lately. I was wondering if something was going on..."

He ends his reply on a sort of question, like he's expecting you to open up to him about everything at once. You almost laugh out loud at the absurdity of it. How could he possibly expect you to do something like that? And so easily too...

You inwardly scoff. Nice try. You're not getting anything out of me, Chan. Better you don't know anyway. I know you'll change your mind about me.

But your heart takes control of your mouth, and maybe it's the constant sense of longing you seem to have around Chan, but you want to open up to him. Tell him everything, about your terrible past and terrible experiences, and all you are because of it. And a sudden, lingering sense of hope makes you believe that even after you tell him all of it, he'll stay.

Even if it's just for a moment.

"I, um.. I just had an argument with someone," you say vaguely. And it's not entirely the truth. But it's not exactly a lie either. The words shouted at you earlier flash through your mind, white and hot and painful. Like a fresh cut, a harsh, swift slice too deep and sudden to process. Where, for a moment, there's nothing, until the blood starts filling the white gap and then spilling over, like a gruesome parody of tears.

Chan turns to face you on the couch. "Argument? About what?"

You shift a little uncomfortably. Now you have to tell him. "About- just whatever."

"It's not whatever, Y/n," he says firmly. "Not if it's making you this upset."

And maybe it's the sudden realisation that Chan is so normal, with his normal family and mind and life that you feel a raging pang of jealousy fill you up from your toes to your head. You huff and turn away.

"It's nothing," you grit your teeth, fighting not to spit venom.

Stop it, Y/n. It's not his fault.

Chan blinks in surprise at your slightly harsh response but doesn't push you any further. You don't look at him, but you hear him sigh and get up to toss the empty takeout container in the trash. Your heart sinks and you wait for him to turn around and chide you for being so rude and stubborn. After all, he was just trying to help.

But he doesn't. He sits back down on the couch, and looks up at the ceiling, so that you two are lying next to each other in the exact same position. He doesn't talk, either.

You both sit in deafening silence.

You're grateful when the door opens with a haphazard bang and Han walks in, clad in an oversized grey hoodie and sweats. He's clutching a notebook in his hands, glasses slipping off the bridge of his nose. You know the story Chan told earlier was true because you can see smears of sparkly highlighter high on his cheekbones. He doesn't seem to be aware of the time, nor the dark state of the room, or the fact that you're so tense your shoulders feel like concrete.

You're grateful for the interruption until he walks over to Chan and promptly sits in his lap. Han murmurs a few lyrics to him, who seems unfazed by the sudden action, and questions about what he thinks could be changed with the song words. Chan replies quietly and his gaze flicks to you in the dimness of the room, but you just shrug, saying you don't mind.

But sitting there, watching Han sit so quietly and comfortably in Chan's lap makes your heart pang for some reason. He wasn't afraid, didn't ask if it was okay, just sat right down and made himself comfortable. Because you know for a fact Chan lets him do this.

And maybe it's the way Chan strokes an absentminded finger down Han's shoulder, or the way he speaks so softly, or the way it's so reminiscent of someone taking care of their child, but you find your eyes brimming with hot tears by the time Han gets up and leaves.

Chan turns to you, about to say something about the lyrics of the new track, but he stops short. A look of worry comes over his expression.

He scoots closer, placing a warm hand on your arm. "Baby? Are you okay?"

All you can do is shake your head, your eyes scrunching up as you fall into his arms. Chan holds you close, one hand cradling your head against his chest like you're the most precious thing in the whole world. Little do you know, to him, you are.

You sob. The reality of everything comes crashes down on you and all you can do is wail and hiccup into Chan's warm, solid chest. You expect him to push you away by the time the tears have soaked through his shirt, but he doesn't. He holds you close and rocks you gently, shushing you and cooing as he wipes hot, sticky streaks off your cheekbones.

You can't help but cry harder. Your eyes almost sting from how hard you've scrunched them up, and your hands ball in the back of Chan's hoodie like it's a lifeline. And it is. You feel that if you let go, you might fall and never return.

"I'm here," you hear Chan whispering through the mess. "I'm here."

Again and again he says it, and every time he does, your tears flow a little slower, and he keeps saying it until your breakdown has reduced itself to a fit of hiccups and messy sniffles. Still he doesn't push you away, or snap at you to get over it, or that your tears mean nothing. He just sits and holds you.

When you finally look up, Chan is smiling gently, reassuringly, though a little sadly. He sees the look in your eyes and knows you don't want to talk about it, so he sits and rocks you softly on his lap. You squeeze your eyes shut and heave in a rocky breath.

Please just keep holding me, you beg him silently. Just for a while.

And he does. And he doesn't let go, not even when you whimper into his shoulder and soak the juncture of his neck with your misery. He kisses the salty wetness away and strokes the pads of his fingers across your face, where the skin is red and sticky.

"I love you," he whispers.

"I'm sorry," you cry. "I can't get it all out of my head, and- it's too much, and I can't-"

"Shh, baby. I've got you, okay? Just breathe for me."

You heave in a few breaths and continue clinging to him. He feels so warm and safe. All you want is to be surrounded by him, to breathe him in, have him tell you that he loves you.

He must have read your mind, because he leans close to your ear and whispers firmly.

"I'm not leaving you, yeah? I'm gonna stay right here, hold you til you're better. You mean the world to me, hmm? Do you know that?"

You shake your head sadly.

"Now you do. I'm not going anywhere," he says with such conviction that you almost begin to believe it. He wraps his arms closer around you and kisses your forehead, whispering fiercely.

"I promise."

a/n: masterlist

[mybelovedwoo]

song mingi as boyfriend - headcanon

headcanon, romance, fluff, smut

gn!reader x bf!atz

wc. ~0.8k

an: happy mingi day everyone!!

you can request headcanons if you want to (please only headcanons)!! if you want to be tagged in any of my fics you can apply here <3

masterlist

- the type of boyfriend who will be obsessed with you, and his whole personality would be around loving you and being the best boyfriend possible

-his lockscreen is you smiling for a picture he took on a date, he has playlists on his phone made just for you that you listen to whenever you are together and he talks about you all the time, like always has a fun fact to add about you in a conversation "you know when y/n was a child she liked that too" or "my girlfriend can also do that"

-he would give you the entire world if he could, unfortunately, he can't, but he would do everything with his power to make you feel like you are the most important, precious thing in this world (and next to him you actually feel like it)

-he would quite literally take you everywhere with him, to his studio, to dance practices and schedules, and if you go somewhere he would follow you around too, shopping and even meeting up with your friends

-he likes casual dates, like going out to eat (but not a too fancy place, more like a bbq) or going to the arcade or to the movies

-has a list on his phone about the things you like, and every time a birthday or Christmas, or any holiday comes he opens it and buys a thing from the list. looooves to give you gifts, especially clothes that he thinks would look good on you

-incredibly loyal, he will never leave you behind ever, and you can always count on him, he literally would drop everything if you ask him to

-he LOVES to be pampered, I mean he is just a big baby who loves cuddle time, and also appreciates when you cook for him (it just makes him fall in love with you even more)

-he can get very jealous sometimes, he just gets very sulky those times, but you just have to give him attention and lots of kisses for him and everything is okay

-constantly on a mission to make you laugh, but what makes you laugh actually the embarrassing things he does to make you laugh not the actual joke

-he loves to kiss the top of your head when you lean on him, it's a habit of his that he picked up due to his height

-he thinks you are the cutest human on planet earth and you think the exact same thing about him (bc he is)

-he will get all giggly when you initiate a hug or a kiss, but his favorite is when you hold his face and look deep into his eyes, he probably would get a heart attack from that, he can't take compliments either he would blush so hard

-his kisses are very slow and soft, but he would hold your face with one hand a bit roughly just to hold you secure, and the other hand is around your waist to keep you close to him

-he would call you nicknames like baby, princess or his personal favorite pumpkin, which is even your contact name on his phone

nsfw +18!!!

-so I think mingi is a switch, he could be a soft dom (but not as soft as san if you know what I mean), but he's rather a sub, he likes it when you take control, he thinks it's extremely hot, but doesn't mind taking control either if you're in the mood for that

-it always starts out very soft and romantic, just like his kisses. cuddle times lead to sex 70% of the time, he just wants to feel you even closer to him

-other times he is just really horny, but that's a whole different kind of sex, it would be hot and steamy, like when he comes home all frustrated from practice because he was thinking about you the whole time, or when he gets a bit jealous because you got a bit too close to another member

-when he is a dom ohh boy you'll have a long night. he would do literally anywhere, in the kitchen, in the shower, on the couch

-manhandles you shamelessly, pushes you against the wall, and loves to slap your booty (but not in the way it actually hurts)

-but when he is a sub, he is so loving and careful, all light touches and tender kisses, he just wants to be babied at those times

-for positions, sub mingi loves it when you ride him, he loves the view he gets, but dom mingi loves a good doggy, also loves to view from behind 

-i think vocally he is a bit shy in the bedroom, wouldn't speak much during it, just groans a lot

-aftercare is really important for him but prefers it when you do it to him, or at least for it together, would be really soft and kinda in a sentimental mood after

[texasteaparty]

Hangster quirk au

Jake, born into a strong quirk family, raised from the get go to become a hero and rise in the ranks, ends up being shunned and disgraced by his father because his quirk mutated from the familial strength enhancer quirk to a time winder quirk.

By the time Jake is 15 he's all but living with his best friend Javy. They train their quirks and commit to being their own version of Heroes by enlisting and so they both apply to the Naval Academy when they graduate and are determined to become pilots.

They get so good at flying that they're sent to the top of the line, best of the best, TOPGUN program that teaches pilots how to fly alongside winged heroes and to train to dogfight against other flight oriented quirk users.

The night before their first day has them at a nearby officer's bar, and it's there that Jake first catches sight of the most beautiful man he's ever laid eyes on. This man is tall, with big, gorgeous brown eyes and the softest looking smile he's had the pleasure of seeing.

Jake wastes no time in heading over to him, and sure, maybe he ends up putting his foot in his mouth with a few crass comments, but it gets a laugh out of the man so he can't be too bothered by it.

They talk for hours. Bradley is from California, and really loves to swim, and sing. But when Jake tries to cajole him into showing off with the piano nearby, Bradley vehemently denies and changes the subject.

They end up fucking in the back of Bradley's bronco, a sweaty, cramped endeavor that ends with them laughing more than anything but Jake loves the whole thing more than he cares to admit.

He is so high on lust and adrenaline and whatever floaty shit that seemed to be injected directly into his veins with every single kiss from Bradley that he doesn't end up getting his number.

But it's okay. Jake is certain he'll be seeing Bradley again.

And he does.

The very next day.

It startles him, only slightly, but Jake takes it in stride and ups the ante on his game and vows to woo Bradley with both his skills and his charm.

(he still ends up saying a few things that earn him a harsh retort or a scoff, because though Jake may be a natural flirt, he also has a perpetual foot in mouth issue that comes out in full force around very attractive men)

They do end up getting together near the end of TG. And Jake gets to show off his quirk control and flying skills and just how good he is at giving head. Bradley, in turn, shows Jake that he can keep up in the air, with skills that rival his own—albeit a tad too cautious—and that he can play several instruments, piano included.

It's not until 6 months into their relationship that Bradley finally shows Jake what his quirk does. Bradley takes him out to the beach near his house, guitar in hand and a nervous bead of sweat on his brow and instructs Jake to just...sit and watch and keep and open mind and to just trust me please.

Jake sits and listens and floats.

Bradley pulls him out of his reverie a few minutes later, sheepish and gentle, and then explains that his quirk is called Siren Song and that his dad had a similar quirk. That when he sings he attracts people like moths to a flame and so it's why he's denied and avoided Jake's requests for so long because he wanted to make sure that his persuasive quirk didn't alter Jake's emotions in any way.

"you're so stupid Rooster," Jake couldn't help but snort, flicking his boyfriend on the nose when he pouts. "I can tell when my feelings are real, and baby, this is real."

💖😭

Lemme know if y'all want more? Maybe. Lmk your thoughts pls

[thoughtdaughterdisease]

okay, so i was thinking about what type of music each one of the avengers would play in the car/quinjet, so here are my thoughts !!

Tony:

Mostly AC/CD obviously, Led Zeppelin , Styx, some lynard skynard, mostly like 80s-90s rock, (or if you get lucky, some milli vanilli.)

Steve:

Yes, a lot of 40s music, feat. Taylor Swift, Marvin Gaye (thanks sam!), Queen, some of The Beetles stuff, maybe even some Bob Marley to be honest :)

Bucky:

As he said in FATWS, he likes 40s music. secretly likes certain Billie Eilish songs, ie; birds of a feather, skinny, the greatest. Would like Hozier, The White Stripes, and Sex On Fire by Kings of Leon. loves ed sheeran songs

would have the saddest relationship with Sailor Song (by Gigi Perez) EVER.

Bruce:

Definitely Classical Music. He definitely seems like the type of person to have the most chaotic self destructive relationship with Requiem by Mozart.

But, sometimes he'll definitely listen to The Beetles and Queen, (probably had a secret addiction to *NSYNC or the Backstreet Boys.) Would lowkey vibe to MARINA and Mother Mother if had the chance.

Clint:

I feel like Clint doesn't listen to a lot of music because he needs all his senses and combined with his hearing problems, it's never really been confident. However, i think if he did listen to music it would be like, Counting Crows, Coldplay, Imagine Dragons, etc.

Sam:

This man has two sides and you cannot convince me otherwise.

1. Hip Hop, or just a range of shitty rap to good rap. so 50 cent, eminem, Dr. Dre, P-Diddy 😨, Ludicrious, Kendrick Lamar, Kanye, Travis Scott, XXTENTENTIONXX. i feel like he would've made his dislike for drake very clear from the moment he got famous

2. Marvin Gaye. Jazz. Blues. The whole shebang, all of it, the slow rock, and let's not forget; Michael Jackson.

Natasha:

Again, Like Clint, i don't think she'd really like having the vulnerability of when you're listening to music but, she does like when Tony puts on his music in the Quinjet. I also feel like she'd like The White Girl Music. She genuinely Believes there's nothing better to rock out to than Unwritten by Natasha Bedingfield.

Has a hidden Apprieciation for songs like Dance Of The Sugar Plum Fairy, because of how much she loves to dance to them. (this also applies to movies like black swan, etc.)

Thor:

He just so in love with Disney Movies that he Unironically listens to the soundtracks when someone else shows him how. It's really the only music he willingly listens to on earth. On Asgard however, I think he'd like the musicians there but he's never paid much attention to them.

Loki:

If he found out how to use spotify, his liked songs would be filled with Classical Music, Instrumental Covers of Pop Songs that he doesn't know, some Adele songs, Partition and Haunted by Beyoncé, Some MISSIO songs, Fall Out Boy, Teen Idle by MARINA, Lords, Michael Buble, Sex with a Ghost by Teddy Hyde, Artic Monkeys, PHOEBE BRIDGERS FOR SUREEE.

he is the embodiment of BLUE by Billie Eilish and nobody can convince me otherwise.

HAMILTON, HE WOULD LOVE HAMILTON.

----

i have a really unhealthy obsession with 2012 Avengers.

[jailforwriter]

A closer look at...

Okay, so chances are you remember studying negative spaces in middle school art class. As a refresher: "negative spaces" are the blank spaces around and between the subjects of a composition (i.e. the "positive spaces"). It's also likely that you drew a chair one time using this technique and didn't think about it again, but what if I told you that you can apply it to writing, too? (Yeah, I AM still chasing the glorious high of getting an A+ in middle school art class, and no, I haven't come up with a way to make fingerpainting relevant to writing yet. But I will, TRUST.)

Literally how?

By making what isn't said and shown have meaning! Cool, right? See, in the same way that the empty areas around the chair are what make it look like a chair, the empty areas around that conversation/description/explanation are what will make the subtext visible. Or, you know, detectable, since there's no visibility involved in subtext. Or text, for that matter. Huh. ANYWAY—

But I love talking. Doesn't saying stuff say more stuff? Don't I get more stuff per stuff?

You'd think so, but nope! Remember that "less is more" thing your mom used to say so you'd shut up about dinosaur nostril circumferences on the car ride to school? Yeah, it's that. Basically. What we mean by it in the context of writing is that you're adding too much static (extra noise) to your signal, so now we can't hear the song at all. The "song" here is what you're trying to get across, the "signal" is the way you've chosen to do it, and the "static" is that stupid scene they tack on at the end of every movie ever where they overexplain the plot for your uncle who fell asleep half an hour ago. But we are not catering to your uncle. It's good practice to assume that your audience has both the ability to pay attention and the desire not to be babysat. It's polite, even. So let's remember our manners and resist the urge to make characters say some clunky "I'm really angry" line when going like this >:( would suffice. Let the reader interpret stuff sometimes, PLEASE. Make 'em work for conclusions. Participation is what makes things memorable, I promise!

OKAY, fine. I won't try to fill up every space. But when can I use this technique?

Like, all the time, dude. The next time you want someone to give you more details about something, just keep quiet after they answer and they'll feel pressured to— oh, wait. You mean in writing, right? Haha. Gotcha. Alright, let's have a look at the three main places where you can implement this:

Dialogue (what's left unsaid):

Nothing takes the wind out of a conversation's sails like overstating stuff. Seriously, don't underestimate the impact meaningful pauses, omissions, and interruptions can have on an otherwise bloated exchange. For instance:

"Are you okay?" John asked. "No. I'm angry with you. Also, this crossword puzzle represents a breakdown in our communication. Like, subtextually."

There are a few occasions where stating things plainly like that can work, such as when one character is tired of trying and failing to get the other to acknowledge their feelings, but for the most part, there are better ways to go about this. Consider:

"Are you okay?" John asked. Mary pushed her glasses back up her nose with her middle finger, and realizing she'd miscounted the spaces, crossed out her four-letter word for moron.

Yeah, that communicated a whole lot more and avoided the stilted expository language no one would actually use. Yay.

Another way to say things without really saying them is by having two characters talk about one thing when really, they're talking about something else entirely. It's the classic Hallmark movie moment where a father and son talk about baseball while actually talking about their strained relationship. It usually goes something like this:

Father: "The Mets aren't doing too hot this season. No discipline, no teamwork. At this rate they won't make it to the World Series." Son: "Yeah." Father: "Back in my day, the coach would've torn us apart for playing like that. No mercy. Certainly no room for egos." Son: "Maybe that's why no one wants to play for him anymore." Father: "Or maybe players these days don't take responsibility."*

*Assume awkward and combative eye-contact throughout.

So on and so forth. You've heard it a million times before. But the object lessons here are: the lack of anyone expressing how they actually feel, the beating around the bush via metaphor, and the maximizing tension by minimizing words. Negative spaces! Literally! There's a massive chasm between them and everything is negative as hell!

2. Description (what's left unshown):

Look, I'll be the first to advocate for describing what's present in scenes, because quite frankly, I'd have no damn clue what's going on otherwise. It's hard enough having to conjure up mental images from the black-and-white word soup in front of us. Having said that, indulging in a teeny bit of not showing things can be very effective. For instance:

Drawing attention to the scuff marks on the floor and making me infer that there used to be a second chair there is much more immersive than showing me the chair and having someone mention that no one sits there anymore.

Brains don't like empty spaces. They feel compelled to fill them. So let them! Readers will feel more engaged that way, and will be pretty much guaranteed to ask themselves more questions and get themselves more invested in the situation than if you'd simply filled in the blanks with clutter.

3. Action (what is left undone):

Much like how what you didn't say to your best friend that one time she wore a neon leotard to school says a lot about you, what you didn't do to keep her from slipping in the mud and ruining it forever communicates entire essays about your values, qualities, upbringing, and all those backstory details that make online personality quizzes so fun. To illustrate this:

The phone is ringing. It's someone your character hates. They could opt for action and take the call, perhaps cuss the other person out for good measure, but crucially, they could also opt out of the action. They don't have to take the call. In fact, not doing so might express an even deeper dislike than picking up and yelling would. It's all about using the "negative space" around the untaken action to define the subject at the core of the conflict, which in this case is anger.

Now imagine all the other subtle ways in which you could implement this! A king who doesn't rise when someone enters the throne room. A person lingering at the door and choosing not to knock. Someone getting a letter and deciding not to open it. The possibilities are endless, and there are plenty of empty spaces around them to play with. Yay.

4. Plot (what is left unexplained):

This one is a bit of a bonus observation, since it's not as immediately appreciable as the rest, but please don't be afraid to leave some gaps between plot points! Those empty ("negative") spaces are where the readers will trace their lines to connect the dots! Let them piece together the scraps of backstory and build your character up themselves; I promise you seeded everything well enough for them to arrive at the right conclusion unaided. Give them (and yourself!) some credit, dude.

In summary: emptiness can be cool and useful, and you should consider not saying/doing/showing the thing sometimes.

Happy writing!

[onepieceisreeeeaaalll]

The Straw Hats As My Spotify Wrapped

Look, this post is very self-indulgent and chronically online. I understand it's probably just for me, and I'm okay with that. I've watched a lot of One Piece this year and have made it all the way from Fishman Island to where I'm snuggly in Act 2 of Wano. I'll provide my rationale, but I just wanted to share the random songs from my wrapped that remind me of the Straw Hats and a couple bonus people! I'll also throw in a specific lyric to show what I mean.

THIS BEING SAID: I think everyone should do this. All the people I follow and all mutuals. I would LOVE to see everyone's wrapped songs and pair it with their fave characters.

LUFFY Meet Me At Our Spot - THE ANXIETY, WILLOW

Okay, I labored over this one. There are a few songs that give me Luffy vibes for different reasons, but this one kind of just fits in the sense where I just...feel like it's the best vibe? It's about youth and forgetting about your worries by spending time with the person you care about. Luffy is that person for so many people and his crew means everything to him. It's like an escape, kind of like freedom. Idk. I also thought about Doombop by the Toxhards for him.

Meet me at our spot Got something I wanna show you Meet me at our spot They can't find us there

ZORO Heavy Is The Crown - Linkin Park

I know people have their opinions about this song's placement in LOL and the new Linkin Park singer, but I think this song is just kind of awesome for a war chant. I feel like you could make an AMV of any Zoro fight to this song and it would elevate it.

You can't win if your white flag's out when the war begins Aimin' so high but swingin' so low Tryin' to catch fire but feelin' so cold

NAMI not yours, never was - Cherub Tree 

Please, please listen to riot grrrl music. Nami is a badass and this just feels like the perfect woman empowerment song for her.

Let's smoke the parliaments and burn them all to ashes You think you're gonna stop me? Come on dude As if you own me? Seriously?

USOPP Talk Too Much - Renee Rapp 

This is for a few reasons, the obvious one being that Usopp is a talker. Through-and-through. But it's the anxiety that makes him talk so much, which Renee Rapp talks about in this song. It's definitely more of a love song, but still. I think it applies.

I'm takin' everything I see as a sign and I know it's crazy But what if it's right

SANJI Home - Cavetown

OKAY OKAY so I know people have their opinions on Cavetown but everyone is going to have to pry this song out of my cold dead hands. When I watched Whole Cake earlier this year, my love for Sanji just grew exponentially. He's been through so much but he's still just such a beacon of light. He's kind, he's caring, even after all of the pain he's been put through. I feel like this song just kind of encapsulates that part of him that still feels vulnerable from the trauma.

Get a load of this train wreck His hair's a mess and he doesn't know who he is yet But little do we know, the stars Welcome him with open arms

CHOPPER HOT TO GO - Chapelle Roan 

This is mostly just because I saw an animation somebody did of Chopper doing the dance and I LOVED it. I always think of him and his cute little arms.

H-O-T-T-O-G-O Snap and clap and touch your toes Raise your hands, now body roll Dance it out, you're hot to go

ROBIN Mic Check - Sophie Hunter 

Confession: this was my number one most played song this year, I've had a rough year lol. Why I chose it for Robin is kind of self-explanatory. She has been through so much and her 'I want to live' moment is very obviously iconic and impactful to the story and her character. What I like about this song is it's kind of like an acceptance of those negative, self-harming thoughts and behaviors that permeate all of us. It's kind of like a 'fuck it, we ball.'

Mic check Think I got a jacked up preset Been feeling myself start to regress All I want to be is decent Yeah I need a pick-me-up

FRANKY Na Na Na - My Chemical Romance

This man has built and rebuilt himself. His transformation from Cutty Flam to Franky is such an important shift for his character. I just feel like this song is kind of like an anthem to that, though it's more about when he became a punk in Water7. It's his own 'fuck it, we ball.' It's high-energy and I think really fits him.

(Na, na-na-na, na-na-na) Let's blow an artery (Na, na-na-na, na-na-na) Eat plastic surgery (Na, na-na-na, na-na-na) Keep your apology Give us more detonation

BROOK DEBT COLLECTOR - Jhariah

This is purely because of vibes. The song is kind of like a dark fantasy which I think suits Brook really well. Plus it's got a cool kind of jazzy funk to it that I think the Soul King would heavily fuck with.

Gravedigger Cordial killer Your payment is due, they're looking at you We've done what we can, it's out of our hands Sooner or later, it comes back again

JIMBEI Read My Mind - golda may cover (originally by The Killers)

Ah, the Fishman Island Arc. The things that came out of it about Jimbei's time in the Sun Pirates just made me love him even more. They fought so hard to save people from slavery and the injustices of the World Government, and I feel like the softer vibes of this cover feel like it would suit a flashback or reflection of that time.

The good old days, the honest man The restless heart, the Promised Land A subtle kiss that no one sees A broken wrist and a big trapeze

BONUS: 

ACE Sirens - Bear Ghost

This one took a minute and I debated a few other options. Bear Ghost controversies aside, this song kind of reminded me of a meta-analysis I read about Ace a while back relating to how he perceives himself and his general self-worth. It was a very good read and maybe if I can find it I'll link it here. Anyway, this song is basically like an ongoing panic attack.

Brother, sister, please don't shame me Silence so loud But I promise I'm fine here I'm just getting my fill And if you had just what I need I wouldn't want it now

LAW vampire - Olivia Rodrigo

I slaved over which song from my list would work for Law, and there are so many. This is the least self-indulgent, the rest that remind me of him are purely based off of a stupid oc roleplay that I do not care to elaborate on lol. This song for Law, though - WOW, I just think of the struggle he went through finally taking down Doflamingo. It wasn't planned, it wasn't what his goal was, but it was so important for him to heal those old wounds.

I see the parties and the diamonds sometimes when I close my eyes Six months of torture you sold as some forbidden paradise I loved you truly Gotta laugh at the stupidity

DOFLAMINGO Good To Be King - Journey to Bethlehem

I'm sorry to report that I am a theatre kid. This musical has some bops, and while I'm not particularly religious, I absolutely loved this song. Every time I hear it, I think of Doflamingo and his time in Dressrosa.

Look how the peasants work down to the bone As I sit up high on my velvety throne Pulling the strings on the people below It’s so stinking good to be king

OKAY THAT'S IT! THANKS FOR READING IF YOU DID!

[fangface-xena]

dnd5e!yellowjackets HC

Since the last post about this ended up getting over like 5 notes I decided to actually flesh this out somewhat properly. To the incredibly niche group of people who will actually be interested in this, please let me know your thoughts!

Shauna: Soulknife Rogue + Path of Wild Magic Barbarian multiclass

I feel like there could be an argument for Bard with her writing but I feel like the whole brooding, tortured personality really lends itself to the rogue stereotype. Plus, how could we forget Mrs. ‘it’s just like riding a really gross fucked-up bike’... She's 100% proficient with finesse blade weapons. Charisma dumpstat queen! I also know in my heart of hearts she HAS to have some levels in Barbarian after the whole Lottie thing. No spoilers but "As folk of deep feeling, barbarians are especially susceptible to these wild influences, with some barbarians being transformed by the magic." (Barbarian: Path of Wild Magic, TCoE) tell me this isn't literally about her and Bard!Jackie's influence?

Jackie: College of Glamour Bard

College of Glamour has Jackie written ALL over it. Jackie who got picked to be captain because of her influence? Bet. Every single ability in this class sounds like it was written with this bitch in mind. 'weave a song of fey magic that imbues your allies with vigor and speed', 'charge your performance with seductive, fey magic', 'makes others want to serve you', 'makes you look more lovely and fierce', like bro come on. She'd be out on a quest serving face and giving little speeches like she did for Allie, throwing Bardic Inspirations left right and centre (especially at Shauna).

Lottie: Circle of the Shepherd Druid + Order Domain Cleric multiclass

I feel like this is such a clear cut one that I barely need to explain myself. I definitely think Lottie's a Druid as her main class, with some levels in Cleric and not the other way around. I don't think she set out to be a messiah of the wilderness, she was literally just a girl listening to the trees and kind of fell into it as the others started following her lead. Lottie's connection to the Wilderness and her willingness to lead the other girls towards its worshipping (Laura Lee style lmao) is so Shepherd coded lmfao. I was on the fence between Order, Tempest and Nature (basic and boring) for the Cleric subclass but I truly think Lottie's worshipping of the Wilderness comes from a place of following what she perceives as the natural order of things i.e. 'he doesn't belong to her', letting the cards pick who Snackie 2.0 is, 'It wants us to'... need I go on?

Natalie: Hunter Conclave Ranger if we're being basic / Gloom Stalker (Doom Stalker!) Ranger if we're being spicy

Okay so I am still undecided on this one and thoughts/opinions are so welcome. So, Natalie is definitely a Ranger, not just for the whole gun thing but because she's the literal embodiment of survival, even before they ever got stranded. Similarly to Bard!Jackie, I truly believe all ranger abilities apply so well to Natalie's character, especially if you think about her "outcast" status in school. Hunter is the most obvious subclass choice because she is quite literally the group's main hunter, but I feel like Gloom Stalker fits her present day character so well.

Taissa: Fiend Patron (?) Warlock + College of Eloquence Bard multiclass

Tai might be a lawyer-state senator girlboss, but she is haunted by a strange alter ego and a dude with no eyes FIRST! I definitely think her weird fugue self is her patron, but I'm not sure how that would translate into an actual subclass so I'll just stick with Fiend for now (Dirt Fiend!Tai my beloved). Besides being a grade A dirt eater, she's also got at least 3 levels in Bard for the College of Eloquence subclass since that's like textbook lawyer/politician. Unlike Natalie, I think her '96 self fits the multiclass aspect well and it definitely would still apply in school and then in the Wilderness.

Van: Oath of Devotion Paladin

Now, when I wrote this down in my notes app I did have it written as 'Paladin (OATH! OF! DEVOTION!!!!)' for a reason. This bitch is a ride or die (or get mauled by wolves) to her core. There are so many reasons why Paladin fits Van so well! Firstly, I think we can easily draw parallels with her goalkeeper position in football (fuck saying soccer). Her buying into Lottie's Wilderness cult stuff also heavily matches the Paladin schtick, but I think we can trace it back all the way to her relationship with Tai. Even before she embraces the Wilderness worshipping, she's so incredibly devoted to Tai that she risks dying just to go support her girlfriend in her mission to find help.

Misty: School of Illusion Wizard

Misty was a tricky one to figure out but I definitely thought it had to be a spell casting class. Despite her leg-chopping, cliff-pushing, stew-spiking antics, I don't think Misty would fit a melee or a more physical class very well. Out of all the casters, I think Wizard suits Misty the most because I do think everything Misty has, she's had to build herself. She had to learn how to adapt, whether that be socially (autistic queen) or practically (she'll learn any skill just to be useful an needed), in order to fit in in a way that the other girls just do. This aligns incredibly well with how Wizards don't have innate magical abilities, but do have an incredibly large pool of knowledge that they can gather. I was actually split between School of Enchantment or Illusion for the longest time, because I can see both of them applying to Misty to some degree. In the end, I went with school of Illusion because I don't think she is necessarily as charming and the Enchantment subclass suggests, given how off-putting she comes across even in the present timeline and to people who didn't know her weird, psycho little self in school. Instead, I feel like her ability to manipulate people comes from her fabricating situations and bending reality to match her wants and needs. Destroying the black-box, getting a nursing degree, being a goddamn citizen detective, are all ways that Misty has found to create the illusion that she's useful, needed, innocent, normal.

Some of these are way longer than others (also it's like 3 am and I have had my bodyweight in sangria tonight so idek if they're coherent) but I hope it's still an interesting read. I'm definitely up for discussing anything a bit further with anyone who actually cares enough to read this lmfao.

I've also decided to spend my Christmas holiday designing custom, Yellowjackets inspired character sheets for each of these bitches despite knowing fuck all about graphic design software so I might post those eventually.

[mightydyke]

So the song that goes like "Elysium, the place the when your sorrows end, why'd you bring me here again?" was an actual song in-universe, written and performed by some New Albion based musician. I'm probably interpreting this was too literally but just think of the implications.

You live in New Albion. You start a band with some friends and record this song. It's fairly popular, getting played on the radio a few times. Then suddenly the city is overrun by dolls that have the souls of dead people trapped in them and your song gets super popular due to all the fucking dead people playing it. Sure okay. I mean it's pretty good publicity but also creepy? Why are they playing your song over and over?

And then one of the most important dolls that belongs to the family that run this whole necromancy business creates a song. It has the same melody as your song and features the word "Elysium" but other than that it's different. All the dolls are playing this song. It's basically a rip off of your song. Do you get angry that they blatantly copied you? Let's say you want to sue them for infringing on your copyright. Someone point out that they're dead, so do the laws apply to them? And then let's say this starts a whole legal debate about wether the dolls can be classified as people or not. Edgar lobbies for them not to be classified as humans because otherwise he wouldn't be able to sell them because it would count as human trafficking. Anyway I'm getting sidetracked

So they've ripped off your song but what can you do? Not much. And then a girl commits suicide. She leaves a note that's just the lyrics to this song. This sparks a public outrage and a call for the dolls to be destroyed. You decide it's in your best interest to act like this song has nothing to do with you. Let the dolls keep it. Maybe you continue your music career, writing different songs. Maybe you can't distance yourself from the scandal and your reputation is tarred by infamy. Maybe the authoritarian government that arises doesn't approve of your music. Or maybe you're totally fine and escape with your reputation intact. Who knows? Anyway it's pretty cool to think about

[simply-simplid]

I'm sorry to bother but could you plz tell me the PMF playlist name it seems that the link doesn't work for me and I would like to listen to it while reading ch25.. 🙏🏼😭!

OKAY HOPEFULLY THIS LINK ACTUALLY WORKS

The playlist isn't really organized, it's just a mashup of my different songs for the characterizations of Jackie, Nat, and their relationship- as well as songs that fit the vibes, motifs, and certain scenes of the story.

Some songs that I were listening to during chapter 25 with additional context beneath the cut

if you haven't read chapter 25 and just want the song recs without the context, only read the red text song titles

St. Chroma by Tyler the Creator

"i'm gon make it promise i'm gon make it out"

"I don't like the way that this is looking, mirror got me thinking about my book end."

Both of these lines can represent the mindset of Jackie as she is fighting for survival during the trial.

"can you feel the light inside? can you feel that fire?"

Representative of a few things, the meta spiritual observations of Jackie's soul and the conversation at the end between Jackie and the girl across the fire

Little Lion Man by Mumford & Sons

"But it was not your fault but mine, And it was your heart on the line, I really fucked it up this time Didn't I, my dear?"

This song represents a few themes in the story and the chapter itself. The song itself is about self-reflection and making peace with the perceived shortcomings or mistakes of the past you might have either ignored or over corrected.

In some ways the song fits as Jackie reflecting on her past and trying to make peace with the different choices she's made or signs she's missed that have led to this moment

More directly this song and these lyrics apply to this chapter and others as a back and forth between the relationship of Jackie and Shauna and how their choices end up causing the most pain to each other.

Oh Ana by Mother Mother

"Hold my head under the bath and breathe away. Slit my wrists and watch that blood evaporate. Being this godly can't be good for-"

Okay this song is so heavy and loaded and can mean a lot for this story. It can kind of serve as a parallel between both Lottie and Jackie's experiences as being touched by or at least cognizant of the spiritual powers at play.

It's not so simple as a blessing- for Lottie it is comfort and acknowledgement that she hasn't been granted all her life, but it also isn't something she can fully grasp so it's slowly unravelling her the closer she tries to hold onto it

For Jackie, she didn't want it in the first place, and like so much of her life, it's just another thing turning her into this vessel for others to mold into the image they want of her.

Snow Angel by Renee Rapp

This entire song is fitting for this story- I could write a whole post breaking down every line of it

Instead just give it a listen and know that I have before had this song on a loop while writing for four hours straight before

Come Back to Me by Les Friction

This song is where chapter 25's title comes from

When I was writing the scene of Natalie running through the woods towards Jackie, this is the song I was imagining

"I'm holding out til we're out of time"

"I can feel you here, souls redefined, I can't let go of our design."

"Would you pierce the veil? Would you cross the line? Come back to me"

[mybelovedwoo]

Boyfriend hongjoong or mingi PLEASE?

Thank u so much for your request! I will do Hongjoong now as he was the first one you wrote, but I will do Mingi in the future too!!

kim hongjoong as boyfriend - headcanon

headcanon, romance, fluff, smut

gn!reader x bf!atz

wc. ~0.8k

an: you can request headcanons if you want to (please only headcanons)!! if you want to be tagged in any of my fics you can apply here <3

masterlist

-the always admires you from far away type of boyfriend

-like he always has such heart eyes for you whenever you go somewhere together, you are talking about something in a group setting, he always listens to your every word carefully, he never disappoints you, or he sees how good you're getting along with his members, he smiles at you with that lovesick smile of his

-but sometimes he can get a little jealous too, we know he's an extreme scorpio, like is anyone surprised honestly?

-probably spends most of his time at the studio, but doesn't mind when you accompany him, indeed loves it, he can get a little distracted with your presence sometimes tho

-you always feel so special, because you're the first person to hear some songs of his, in return, you always try to encourage him and tell him how amazing of a producer and songwriter he is (it's not a lie)

-after he is done working in the studio, he usually takes you out for dinner, refuses you to pay for anything, and gets mad when you tell him that you want to pay this time

-you would think he is not much of a fan of physical affection, but it's so different with you, the only place he wouldn't give you that much of it is in public places and in front of his friends and family

-he would hold your hands wherever you go, occasionally he raises yours to his mouth and gives it a quick peck, so you can feel his love even when you're in public

-you wouldn't know this, but he likes to brag about you, telling his friends how wonderful his significant other is

-very protective of you, because he thinks you are his treasure. he would dead-stare everyone who would even look at your way

-would think about your future together, and moving in with you the first month of dating, but would never actually tell you, because he doesn't want to scare you off or something

-his biggest fear is that he can't show you how much he loves you. if he can see any doubt or insecurity, he will reassure you with the most meaningful words and wouldn't ever leave your side in a moment like this

-you two often joke around with "being mean" to each other. it's just you guys' thing. he is definitely into it when you are being mean to him

-always asks you to paint his nails, and he always does the same for you. picking out the colors for each other. also picks out the other's outfit just for fun, but ends up changing the whole thing because it "wasn't him"

-the type of boyfriend that would give you his jacket, saying he isn't cold, but would actually be freezing

-he brings you home little gifts from everywhere he goes around the world, saying "I had to buy it, it reminded me of you baby"

-would stare straight into your eyes before he kisses you, holds your face with one hand at your jaw. also the first thing he does is kiss you every time you two wake up together in the morning, he thinks it's really important and the best way to start the day

nsfw +18!!!

-okay hear me out he is a very emotional lover and sometimes he can get carried away by his feelings, but he is definitely a dom in the bedroom, not a hard dom, but not a soft dom (you know what I mean)

-he prefers intense sex, where can get everything out of his head, and the bedroom is the safest place for him to share it with the person he loves the most, he desires passion and intimacy

-doesn't mind trying out new things, as long as you are okay with it too, very open and adventurous

-his biggest turn-on is direct eye contact I'm telling you, this boy is a sucker for it. he loves how he can see every emotion on your face, it is very intimate and vulnerable for him 

-biggest turn off probably power play, he just doesn't like it when somebody is trying to control him, and probably everything that involves pain

-i feel like hongjoong would be very vocal in bed, sometimes having full-on conversations with you, and also even dirty talk, but only in a loving way, he would never be mean to you in such a vulnerable moment

-this man's sex drive is high af, you would have sex at least four times a week, but it's probably more than that, to be honest, literally doing it in every part of the house, in the kitchen, bathroom, living room, on the floor, literally everywhere

-so for positions, i think he would love a classic missionary where he can keep that eye contact but would love a good flatiron where he is doing you from behind but still stays close to you, also one of his favorites would be just scooping you up from behind, just cuddling up and kissing your face all over

-he would get all sleepy after sex, so he forgets aftercare sometimes, he just falls asleep with you in his arms (who would blame this man, he works too hard)

[vengefulvermin]

Can i get more passage of time/music development yapping ☹️☹️☹️??? I give you official permission to yap the most you can im so interested

YES YES YES YES YES I LOVE THIS ASK

warning beneath the cut SCARY WALL OF TEXT WARNING 😱

decided to divide it into colored parts if you dont gaf about certain elements 😭

second warning all of this is unedited rambling so some points might contradict each other or just plain not make sense.

okay so for CONTEXTTTTT

i have diagnosed OCD, and like, roughly since the end of last year and the beginning of this one, the 'obsession' part of OCD that was negatively affecting me, was the concept of time. how fleeting it was. how it's basically unescapable ALL THINGS MUST PASS (get out of my head george harrison) that shit proper cold dead SCARED ME MAN. sleepless & haunting me in my dreams type shi. sometimes it still does. i try not to think about it too much

to cope, i found great comfort in the 70s-80s since at the time i was and still am hyperfixated on david bowie and that was sort of his prime (love his 90s-00s work tho.) i was also starting to think of how much parallels and similar experiences i have to previous generations and how it's not ALL that bad after all so far. i can still walk to a record store and roller skate if i really wanted to, or go to a diner.

okey here's where the life changing stuff happens. i decided i'd listen to pink floyd's the dark side of the moon. then TIME CAME ON. ohhhh god oh gosh golly god i was bawling and everything the whole song spoke to me on a molecular level. then i found out about DB's song also called time, and i ALSO crode to that. i was like. wow. i'm not alone on this feeling of utter desperation and helplessness as eventually all things Must Pass. (GEORGE HARRSION GTFO)

i used to be bitchy on how i whined i was part of the 'wrong generation.' i thought i was alone, but virtually everyone of almost every era has thought this. somebody who lived my dream life wished they had what i have now.

that's when i started to lowkey realize the parallels and oneness of human experience. i could go to a club in the 70s, and (granted the infrastructure and music remains similar) i could today. nothing would change on how i perceive events. there is no color filter on the past. unless you got huge TVs and stuff all over your house, you could walk around, and think it's the 80s. AND IT'S BASICALLY THE 80s. the way your parents or any other gen Xer saw the world with their *eyes* (not counting the changes in buildings and stuff) is the same as you today pretty much.

i already really enjoy subcultures, and particularly how they evolve and adapt. the indomitable human spirit prevails no matter how gentrified or 'banned' things become. nowadays i feel like there is No Youth Subcultures. at least, none that will pass the test of time and be memorable enough to be remembered in the books. nobody's gonna go to their child and proudly say: "when i was your age, i was a chav" or something. and i credit this to the lack of creativity allowed in the wider music industry.

HEAR ME OUT this is because 90% of youth subcultures had everything to do with music. and now, everything must be palatable. to be clear there's nothing inherently wrong with that type of music, but to me it speaks no soul. it has no risks. contemporary pop music is very much formulaic and this is because now more than ever entertainment (this also applies to movies btw) is more of an investment than passion. I WILL SPECIFY.

music production is so vastly different genre to genre, and we're not letting it flourish because of how much short form content is valued nowadays. LET ME COOK.

tiktoks are formulaic. algorithms are formulaic. WE'RE GETTING SOMEWHERE. there must be an instant hook or rift in music if you want to 'go viral' as a musician. digitized fame doesn't mean SHIT (to me), since clearly monthly listeners don't equate real world fans. album sales are being replaced with streams, and because of how ASS spotify treats its artists, newer, less established acts need to GET ON THE GRIND INSTANTLY to earn Coin. that means that to be smart and work with the exploitative system they're given, they have to make albums filled with 1 minute 30 second songs. so you can technically give them the most amount of streams possible. i feel with this formulaic approach, you can't get 6 minute long gutwrenching guitar pieces. no more 4 minute drum solos, hell avant garde experimental works were 2 people shout their names out at each other for 20 minutes. THERE ARE NO MORE FRANK ZAPPAS.

i'm not going to be one of those sad assholes who claim there's 'no more good rock music' and how it'll never be the same. as corny as this is, the next beatles or nirvana could be right under our noses and we'll NEVER know because of how fame is distributed. it sucks to see a small band beg on tiktok for streams to kickstart their career. but this is what we gotta work with. if we want subcultures to be created and thrive, we gotta go looking underground again, except unlike in the past it's a kajillion times easier now AND everything gets gentrified in 2 tiktok weeks. but this is evolution. MUSIC EVOLUTION

the end honk shoo honk shoo (it's midnight)

[the-words-we-sung]

The songs of Young Royals - S1E2 & E3

And I'm back with another song analysis article ^^ You can find the first one (in which I covered the songs from S1E1) here. I'm gonna do 2 episodes in this post because there are not many songs in episodes 2 and 3!

No tomorrow, Ty Frankett, Stephane Lo Jacomo and Myariag Summers

I'll be in my feels They know I'm the truth When I'm pullin' up I'm bulletproof I don't really care 'bout the rules The most cool Wilhelm has ever looked ^^ He was all blushing and stressed during lunch about what almost happened with Simon, but here he's collected, alone but looking like he doesn't care and just plays it cool. He's the Prince so I guess it's true that the "rules" don't really apply to him but is he "bulletproof"? Unfortunately the whole debacle that is gonna happen with the sex video will prove that statement wrong... (We also know that most of the students at Hillerska don't care that much about the rules, and August says it himself: they could "murder someone and nobody would say a word")

ALPHA, Yung Titties

ABC I'm the alpha bitch If you wanna know who runs this shit ABC I'm the alpha bitch When I'm in a car, I'm driving When I'm on a date, I'm buying Yes girls!! They run this shit ^^ I like that they choose this song when we see the 4 girls hanging out together. I do like them (Felice, Stella, Frederika and Madison) (putting Sara on the side because *complicated feelings*) They're far from perfect but compared to most of the guys in the school, they're pretty cool. I love Felice and how smart/nice/strong she is, and I love her friendship with Wilhelm later on. I hope she'll become even more badass in season 3!! And Madison is the best (and one of the few people in this school who is not terrible to Simon). The song stops as soon as August arrives and takes a chair to sit next to Wilhelm: because yeah, he's not an "alpha". I like that Madison and Felice don't take shit from August: when he starts mocking Simon and Sara (after Felice invites them to the movie night), they immediately tell him off. Then we see Vincent and Nils join August and start bothering the girls (throwing gums/candies at them) and they're not impressed: it's a very short scene but it highlights the fact that they're not interested in their stupid behavior. It's also the episode in which we see the difference between the girls and the boys when it comes to their relationships: we learn at the beginning that Madison and Nils hooked up during the party, but also that Nils was bragging about it and giving the experience a 9/10 while Madison admits doing it mostly because she was bored and not being at all into Nils. We also see August pursuing Felice who is not interested at all. Who run the world? Girls!!

Äter upp dig, Maxida Märak

Nu ska vi leka hela världen är våran Huh inga hinder är för svåra Flyger över alla jag är lätt som en fjäder Strike like a pro BDSM läder Good boys gone bad Alla ser rött King Kong gone mad Jag är blöt du är naken Okay so it's a bit hard to do this one because it's in Swedish and I'm definitely not there yet with this language ^^' From what I understand with the translated lyrics, it's quite a "sexy" song (with some violent undertones: being a wolf, being naked, being wet, good boys gone bad, etc.). The first sentences are about playing and how they have the whole world, which is interesting because it's the parents day at Hillerska and we are introduced to a lot of upper class people, people who have a lot of money and power. In this sense, they are the people who can use the world as a playground: they have the means for that. They're rich and powerful, they're above. The lyrics are also about getting angry though, "seeing red, King Kong gone mad": a little nod to Simon and Sara being pebbles that are gonna throw the whole machinery off? During the lunch, Sara is going to mess up Felice's family with the riding issue (and they're the richest family apparently!). Wilhelm is also gonna upset the order by not sitting at August's table but choosing instead the one table with a family that doesn't belong to Hillerska's upper class environment. So I guess yeah, things aren't going to go that well. And to top it off, August is gonna learn that his family is in fact broke! Oh, how the rich and mighty have fallen...

Hillerska Song

Hope and faith wherever we roam As we make our way back home Oh, we meet with open hearts Another one in Swedish but with the English subtitles directly in the show so it makes it easier to understand ^^ Simon and Wilhelm look SO happy and smiling and smitten in this scene 💜 I like the idea of making their "way back home" because they're not there yet, but they're getting there: being a safe space, being home for each other. And yeah in this scene they still have "open hearts", because Erik has not died yet, because the sex tape hasn't been made/released yet, because none of the awful stuff that is going to make them close in on themselves has happened yet. And Wilhelm is so cute and happy (and it's gonna become very rare to see him like that afterward) that this song deserves another picture ^^

The songs of Young Royals - part 1

[accirax]

initial thoughts on DCAS episode 6

THIS EPISODE WAS SO GOOD!!! the fact that it was a musical episode is totally the cherry on top; i love it when series come with their own music (cough cough me @ project sekai). but overall it was also really funny, and had some great character moments, too.

i'll save my thoughts on strategy and where the season might be headed for my next power ranking post (whenever that is :,( ), but were some of my other thoughts/highlights.

specifically the phrase "fuck my life" and Yul saying it made me cackle. seems like Emily ISN'T Yul's manager, but she might still kinda take on that role this season? we'll see. the lack of phones is really having an effect on the plot.

they hate her so fucking bad

okay, i guess i forgot to consider this angle when i was saying it would've made more sense for them to vote out Fiore. however, having started with 18 participants, the merge will probably happen at, what, 10 people? (modern Survivor describes the merge as "at least 11," but obviously this isn't survivor.) sure, Hunter is a bit of a challenge beast, but he can't protect all three of them every episode. if this trio is only 3/10 of the votes, you could literally split the votes on Ally and Tess in a 3-3-4 if you can get everyone else to unite against them. you know what you should be worried about? THE VILLAINS ALLIANCE HAVING 6/"10" VOTES AT THE MERGE!!! sigh. why am i relying on Jake to be smart (/j)

i'm more impressed that there was hot water in the first place. this thing is in the middle of a field, no?

i'm finally starting to see how Yul can be a hilarious "love to hate him" kind of villain. he had some of the best lines this episode hands down.

TREVEK BECOME CANON???

there was absolutely no reason to put the apple on the stick other than to fit in. love this for her.

idk if this is a winner's cut moment or not. glad that the money would go towards schools and NOT the police force, though.

man, now i want to go back and check the other episodes to see if Tess has had the "Cyan Team narrator" role the whole time. in Survivor, that's indicative of a deep run. ...i really need to stop applying Survivor logic to everything.

and why are you thinking about what would make Oliver laugh, Kristal? ',:)

i appreciate the s1 callback, but Trevor doing this dance move gives me so much second hand embarrassment that i keep inadvertently closing my eyes every time i have to "see" it again. anyways, given how most of the episode songs had lyrics related to the Team's emotional state, it's interesting to see that Trevor is singing a romance song. trevek become canon pt 2?

this was an interesting parallel. with Kristal laughing at Derek's joke, it seems like they were trying to show how she's growing closer to Derek, in a way which Trevor might fear is romantic. were there supposed to be romantic undertones to Alec being the only one to laugh at Connor's joke? and, if there were, was that just a fun nod to the aleconnor shippers, or will it actually be canon/relevant to later in the season?

NOT a surprise. i need to see the "i want you died" poetry he wrote about Fiore after last season.

of course you were, you fucking fruit (affectionate)

the anguish: i love my gf :D let's frolick through a field together

"trust me dude i'm the divorce man"

GABBY?????

mood but also damn is Ellie really leaning into the villain thing this season. this doesn't even help her win the season, she JUST wants to see him suffer.

i forgot that the s1 contestants didn't know that Nina was her own separate being yet

they were NOT lying, Aiden's VA is a great singer! Tom's backing vocals and Ellie and Gabby's harmonies(?) were also really nice too, though. this was probably my favorite song of the episode just bc i think Cyan had the strongest singers. all of the rocking, shoulder-moving dances are also impossible not to imitate.

well, there's the thumbnail. their choice of thumbnail made me laugh bc i remember, back when i was watching s1, seeing all the thumbnails of Aiden kissing both James and Hunter and thinking that Aiden was going to be some sort of troublemaking flirty antagonistic character only to be blindsided by his actual characterization. i'm sure the s1 watching me would have only added this to her arsenal of evidence, although hilariously idk if i would have been able to tell the other character was Tom at the time. anyways, i was pretty certain from the start that this must be part of the performance. although, while i'm happy that Aiden seems to think that James will be okay with the performance, i wish we could have cut to James somehow just to confirm that that was true. i don't want the next time we see James, whether in the finale or some other time, to show that he was actually really jealous and upset at Aiden for kissing another man while in a committed relationship. also gabbielle(?) super cute in the bg :D

he's so fucking stupid... (/pos)

bold of you to say this to Ashley, who has been in a two year relationship with the guy who went home in episode 2.

i also really liked this song :D i understand why they made Jake and Ally the main singers, because they best encompassed what the theme of the song was about, but i think i actually liked Ashley's vocals the best. i wish she'd gotten to sing more. also for a moment i thought Marcus had a trans flag on his hat. it's still close enough. trans Marcus canon.

this was probably my least favorite performance of the episode, although idk how much of that was just how much i hate Alec's outfit. glassesless Alec scares me so bad... no hate to the VAs, obviously, i think they have nice voices! it's actually the way that they didn't sound like they had confidence in their singing abilities that made the performance feel a little shakier to me. i do think that this song had the best lyrics in terms of encapsulating each member of their team, though. i really like how Yul and Riya are the ones to sing "i'm going to chase it" as a duo, because they're the ones chasing fame and the limelight, and then Grett sings that she can't ignore it, because eventually she's going to have to realize that her entire relationship with Yul was a result of him clout chasing. Connor only singing "live in the moment until i die" is also very fitting given his placement... in both seasons. L.

really surprised that Riya (or anyone else) didn't even mention Yul's foot injury as part of this equation. Riya just said that she didn't want to lose any more challenges, and Yul's bad foot could totally lead to a loss. maybe i'm just overestimating the extent to which that foot injury will stick around, though.

season 2 characters are REALLY suffering out here.

HELP??????

love to see Alec and Fiore's kinda sorta dual redemptions. i have high hopes for them.

and those were my initial thoughts, which got way longer than i expected. thanks if you wound up reading towards all the way down here. i have no idea who the leakers are, obviously, but i really hope that they stop acting up soon so that the series can continue. i would hate to have the artists have to take a pay hit and/or stop making the series just because of some people's impatience and delusions of power, or have the honest patrons lose out on being able to watch the episodes early to protect from others' immaturity. see ya!

[spork-supremacy]

so what if I per se wanted to make another long fic. What If I per se wanted it to have each chapter be inspired and borderline following events from Epic:the musical but it’s Jay’s off screen journey in DR. I’ll outline it saga by saga to demonstrate my idea.

Also no same time frames won’t apply because mentally I could not handle Jay being away from everyone for twenty years. Let alone write that myself. I’m weak and want him living a very full rest of his life.

and pretty much some characters don’t have perfect parallels so they’re very interchangeable.

this is long.

Troy saga- I’m thinking this mostly could have chapters/songs 1-4 be on a field mission Jay is sent to command by the administration. Maybe around or in imperium because they were trying to gain intelligence on the “unethical energy source”.

Also Jay keeps his yin pendant and knows that he’s either married or engaged. He has no clue who but he’s given her a name in his head. For reference sake Penelope.

the issue is my dude has no child. So there is no chance he should mention having one.

Unless he got vaguely stuck with one post memory wipe. Maybe a literal infant at first, but would roughly now be 3-5 by the events of S1. He is left in the administration.

Or we go Nya pregnancy before the merge route, but she found out a week before the merge. They made little cards to tell everyone and he kept it in his wallet that also had his ID. So he knows he has a child, but he has no idea where that is.

because Telemachus doesn't actually know who his father is and I would like to keep that so I can keep the vibe. Acidentally created a need for a child oc, shit.

warriors of the mind would be hard to translate but I could just treat it like a dream sequence. Probably Nya or smth. Maybe she is a figure he thinks he makes up in his head who only appears when he sleeps and he befriends.

he just assumes he’s crazy because realm of madness and all.

cyclops saga- could easily be that second half of that mission where they do find something willing to wipe out his people. However at the end there is this thing where Odysseus is cursed by the cyclops and Poseidon follows him every where. Now because no character is going to be consistent parallels, what if the cyclops was just Ras’s master in hiding for reasons. And also I guess the Poseidon stand in would mostly also be Ras. And one out of three Zeus appearances.

No, I like it so I’m keeping it.

and my good bye could be some dream sequence after he makes it home to his office. It’s of the Nya figure being a manifestation of his own disappointment and is like “okay I’m out”

months have now passed. Maybe a year.

storm saga- Easily could be the entire way back to the realm of madness on the mysterium mission after his appearance in season 2 pt1. People lost their portal devices that day. They make a stop at the cloud kingdom for a deal to ensure safe passage home because writers of fate and such and they give him a thingy/ Euphrasia?. Wind bag. Master of wind. Eh?

Then boom Ras. Shows up like “you hurt my master now I have to kill you.”

people die once more.

Circe saga- I feel that most of it could work out like actually story. Get on island, save men from magic, Hermes is replaced by a helpful messanger dragon of sorts, figure out a way home. Bonus points the witch try’s to prove that all men suck by trying to seduce Jay and he’s just like. “But my hypothetical probably real wife...” That he can barely remember.

point is they’re directed to the remains of the cursed realm or departed realm.

underworld saga- they go to underworld. See parts of their squad. The dead ones. (Bonus points for fitting in an elpeanor moment). Now, tree’s a whole thing with Odysseus seeing his mother. I don’t know if I want it to be that way. Granted grief killing Edna, who was already old, could punch a lot considering he doesn’t even remember her, just vaguely recognises the voice of his mother. Anyway the go see a prophet like. “You can go home this way. And yes you do have a wife/fiancé. However I see her with a very creepy dude.”

yes it’s in the same way as the play.

also the chorus just works so well.

“I see a song of past romance, I see the sacrifice of man, I see tales of betrayals and a brother’s final stand. I see beyond the brink of death, I see you draw your final breath. I see a man who gets to make it home alive. And it’s no longer you.”

Anyway guess who decides to embrace his inner monster.

-thunder saga

Once more very simple one. Go through danger the same way, shit Ras. Thunder bringer is the point where Jay switches sides.

-wisdom saga

this one I have trouble with solely for plot reasons. it mainly because of Telemachus’s role and the suitor plot line. At best I could have it do we can make it the tournament or sources.

I've decided unkown pregnancy route for the kid's origins because it's much easier than the other version. Point is Little boy loves his mother and can't wait to meet his father. Telemachus has a whole battle with antinous over saying natsy shit about his mother, later Athena helps.

Consider this, the kid, still to be named, aged around 6, maybe 7, actually picks a fight with a random child, who disrespects Nya in some way, and who has clearly been raised too violently. At this point the general "punch your way out of this one" conclusion can not be reached but instead replaced with Nya picking up her child and leaving, telling him he should know better than to resort to violence, and instead use his heart.

The entirety of legendary- we'll be fine, for plot aligning reasoning would be the kid feeling akward in the crowded and new environment and being extra vigelant of creeps or general bad people. Also most of we'll be fine probably wouldn't apply well, but we keep Nya telling the child about Jay and how similar they are.

love in paradise would be very hard. Unless....

It's literally a one off where Jay finds himself stuck on an island. Probably stepped on a portal device and is now completely stuck, with no way home. Or even knowing where home is anymore. Instead of regular events, lets say Calypso- stand-in is actually a powerful being that helps him with clearing his mind and healing a bit because the man is a wreck. She's forcing him to self care and he wants to leave. Also I'm gonna give her mind related powers, kinda like neuro.

God games is fun because I could have that just be Nya finding a way to call on the source dragons, specifically energy and begging for some devine intervention. She has to convince many dragons.

Vengance-

I'm not sorry for loving you could either be another dream about Nya that helps him realise she was being genuine. Or It's the calypso stand in who is a shape shifter who tries to convine him to stay by shaping herself into "who he loves most" even though he doesn't know that is and just takes it as a further sign to go and pay the ninja a visit.

The same messanger dragon that helped him with the witch comes by to provide assistance across the sea and to the shore then leaves.

Now this could go down the forbidden Jay route, but here me out, he does find Nokt and the forbidden five randomly and kinda goes off on attacking them. At this point he'll electrocute anything in his way. Then Ras and Arin show up, the tiger man fully healed. Less intentionally and more they all ended up in one place type thing. Fight ensues. A storm approaches.

Arin is encouraged to hide. He actually comprehends the power scaling he's up against and does just that.

During the fight instead of finishing Ras off themselves, the five all stratigically retreat. The strength and at some point they realised you don't want to be on the other end of an electrical shock. Maybe Jay kills the weakest one. for funsies.

He goes for a beaten Ras next, aiming for the kill. He tries his best at least, but doesn't bother to confirm before taking the cloak and hat of one of the five that had been lying on the ground, and walking off to whereever home is.

He notices Arin, does bother much to question the kid on too much, and asks him where the ninja live. Arin just points to the vague direction of the monastery and says "On the mountain outside Ninjago, can't miss it."

And so Jay walks.

thats all I got so far. Until the Ithica saga comes out I guess.

I was very loose with vengance but that saga is all about just getting the vengance.

[bisluthq]

https://www.tumblr.com/bisluthq/760849091467067392/yeah-i-agree-but-taylor-doesnt-seem-to-like-to?source=share

The whole "Taylor doesn't relax" thing reminds me of how sad the Speak Now era quotes from the Lover Journals make me:

Oct 8, 2010

"Music has helped me a lot lately. It helps me quiet my very loud fears. I love mornings like that, smiling and talking to strangers, waving to fans, and they burst into tears and screams.. All before noon... I get stage fright every time I walk onto a stage now. I wish it wasn't so, but I can't blame my mind for freaking out about performances. Criticism of my performances has been the biggest source of pain in my life. I sometimes feel like my college degree is in acting like i'm ok when i'm not."

Jun 17, 2011

"Something so unexpected and amazing has happened recently.. I've become blissfully happy with my life. Like, actually grateful for every second of the day... I really do need to create in order to live and feel worthwhile... This ridiculous thing happens to me when i'm this happy. I start feeling like karma will balance it all out by making something tragic happen. But i'm trying to just show gratitude as much as I can. Everyday, every minute, I'm grateful for being happy right this moment. I think I'm a summer person. I'm also a work person. Tour gives me something to pour myself into and a reason to feel ok about sleeping in till noon on my days off."

Sep 8, 2011

"I can't even tell you how alive and worthwhile i feel when I'm writing a new song and I finish it and people like it. It's the most fulfilling feeling, like getting an A+ on your report card."

Oct 30, 2011

"I've had a chest infection for the last few days, so singing has been so hard... I almost cancelled tonight's show, but I made it through... We only have 9 shows left on this tour and I'm ready for a break... I'm just so glad to have a few days off. (ok... 2)"

Mar 2, 2012

"I've been thinking a lot about getting older and relevancy and how all my heroes have ended up alone... I wrote a song and it's called 'Nothin New' and it's about being scared of aging and things changing and losing what you have. It says "I'm getting older and less sure of what you like about me anyways". And in the chorus it says "how can a person know everything at 18, and nothing at 22? And will you still want me... when I'm nothing new" It's a really vulnerable song, but I think it's important to say."

--

Idk. There's just something about a lot of observably unhealthy patterns seemingly developing around this time. Also the comments surrounding "needing to create to feel worthwhile" make me sad, since she's said later that for 6 months before writing Red (so late 2010/Early 2011) she couldn't write anything due to a "particular toxic relationship" *cough* Jake Gyllenhaal *cough*. Anyway. She’s clearly been "doing it with a broken heart" for a long ass fucking time.

yup. And that’s why I say like if this one doesn’t work out (I hope it does) I’d like her to ACTUALLY take time off and be single for a while and deal with her own shit.

okay so story time right because I keep saying this applies to me, and it does, but I do feel like I need to break the pattern and my current bf and I are doing unchartered territory for me like going to couples therapy and whatnot. My friend (the technophobe biokineticist who dated my bf’s close friend) was round the other day and having a whole ass meltdown right because she drank too much (which was on her because it was inappropriate because I had ONE light beer while she was here and my bf didn’t have anything because he thought we might have to drive her home and her car was here so we both needed to be like present yk) and she was going on and on about how she wants to be single until December (which we think is a very solid choice for her) and ergo she was upset her brother told her his friends find her hot (here’s where we lost her train of thought) because her brother and his friends are in their 30s and she’s in her 40s (like my bf also so it was hitting a nerve for us both) and she was going on and on about this and we were like “so would you rather 30 somethings don’t find you hot???” And she was like “no but I want to stay single until December!!!” and we were like “okay so do that lmao a dude finding you hot while you’re out isn’t asking to marry you?” and she was like “yes but I hate that all I’m good for is sex” and we were like “wait so do you want to fuck the 30something or nah because you don’t have to but also he’s a big boy and yes he probably doesn’t look at a 40something and plan marriage and kids right if he’s not stupid but also age gap relationships happen at our age and don’t feel that dramatic so which do you want???” And she was just like “you guys can’t understand” supposedly because he’s a man and I’m in my 30s and maybe that’s true. But all I keep thinking is my bestie evidently pencilled in FUCK DAY on December 5th lol 😂😂😂😂 and that to me is not being single or figuring yourself out at alllll lol.