#also is it just me or is he such a lesbian phenomenon

[lyavee44]

i made a short leon playlist on spotify because there's a shortage of cool stuff with him,,, why's there so much incest and stepcest smut when we could have silly things and dumb headcanons

[oracleofsecrets]

listen I enjoy Temenos as much as the next guy but there are Seven Other Main Characters to choose from (and some who also have some Gay momence…)

To avoid loss of biodiversity in the Octopath 2 ecosystem, there needs to be a Temenos Tax. For every one (1) creative work centered on Temenos, there must be two (2) creative works focused on Any Other character (no, Crick doesn’t count for this purpose. I lov him but he is a risk factor). Works focused on women are worth twice as much

[etcnnante]

actually i have to talk about how vital yossarians sexuality is in catch 22 and how, despite how the hulu show is the best adaptation of the novel, still manages to almost completely ignore it in favor of the infidelity between yossarian and scheisskopf’s wife. which, is still a vital plot point, but to favor that almost completely over the relationship him and the chaplain share has me insaneeeee especially because of how prevalent homosexuality was among all branches of the U.S. military due to how young and inexperienced many of the drafted men (and women) were. like he CONSTANTLY calls orr a very handsome and attractive man, the most beautiful out of the entire battalion. it’s wild to me that it is never explored bc of geo.rge clo.oney’s homophobic ass

[animeyanderelover]

Confession

Hey, everyone. I have something to tell you which has been on my mind since over 4 years now and which I feel like I have to get out of my chest now. I don't want to write for character x male reader anymore. There are lots of reasons and thoughts behind this decision that have accumulated over many years and now I have finally made the decision to stop writing for the x male reader entirely.

The first reason for me is that I was born a woman and that I 100% identify as one. I started this blog mainly because I wanted to write my own fanfics about characters that I love and that is why I started in November 2020 my own blog on this side. However, I wanted to be inclusive which is why I decided to add the option to ask for an x male reader as well. However, I have figured out over the years that I experience less joy writing for requests asking for a male character because deep down this never was what I wanted to write for but I denied those thoughts because I was afraid that people would think that I hate people who identify as men in fanfiction. Part of me also always thought that maybe I would be a hypocrite. I feared to open a pandora box.

After all if I write about a character who is in a happy relationship, married and has a child in canon does that make me a homewrecker? I write about characters who are still teenagers and find myself writing Nsfw about them too so does that make me a pedophile? If I write about a female character x female reader despite the character never having been indicated to have any romantic interest in another woman am I just making everything lesbian to satisfy my own desires? There are women who write about male characters who are gay in canon with a female reader and I admit to having read some of those works too so does that make me homophobic? If I were to write about something like that too because I feel attracted to those characters does that make me a terrible person? Such doubts and worries constantly held me back from getting rid of that option but now I do not have those doubts anymore.

I had a bad start in the anime community by getting involved with some weird fujoshis and their fanart. That has already led me to the decision that I won't write any Nsfw posts with a male character x male reader and with my own consciousness I could never accept to write anything Nsfw related with a female character x male reader. The truth is because I’m an afab writer I could have never inserted myself in a reader with a dick.

Fujoshis and my own preferences are only two reasons though. The last reason for me is because I have had experiences with actual men on this side who pestered me via chat that they wanted me to write for an x male reader and even though I was not comfortable with it they continued anyways. Those experiences are rare but they added to my overall conflict nevertheless. A while ago I had the "pleasure" of being graced with such a person who really wanted me to write about the women of Arcane with a male reader, a phenomenon that I know has been not uncommon in the x reader community of the series on this app. He was awfully entitled and kept whining about the fact that no one seems to be willing to write about the x male reader for characters like Jinx or Vi and that he considers my writing to be good and that I was his last hope. I have blocked him together with the few others who asked the same of him before in that arrogant and pushy way.

None of those three reasons that I have named are the sole reason for that decision, it is more the accumulation of all of those reasons over the last years that have finally led to this post. So here is my final decision:

I won't write for the x male reader anymore.

I am sorry for all those who do not belong to the entitled male reader community and still felt included in my blog but I cannot write about something I do not feel motivated about and feel no joy in writing either. To all those arrogant male readers who my read this and feel insulted, here is my own opinion. Fanfiction is fanfiction. I do not have the right to call you out for writing about male readers with female characters who are gay because I have found myself guilty on the other side by thirsting about male characters who are gay and I might one day find myself writing about them with a female reader as well.

I don't mind shippers either as long as everything is kept within a legal range because if you come up to me and confess to shipping some brainrot vomit like Sebastian x Ciel (Black Butler), Toji x Megumi (Jjk) or All Might x Deku (My Hero Academia) I will not let you anywhere close to me. And yes, those are ships that people actually support and write about!! I personally just don't care about a ship unless the series is a romance but if you just keep it normal with the gay ships I don't care if you ship something like Gojo x Geto or Jayce x Viktor. Just don't be weird and then get all offended and mad when others, including the author of the work (!!!) doesn't ship them.

However, if male readers want fanfics then you just have to build your own fandom community and do it yourself. The fujoshis have done it, the whole x female reader community has done it. You have to do the same. No one of the writers on this app has started in here with any previous experience. I for example didn't write any world-changing book series before I started my blog and I guarantee you, none of the other writers have done that either. Just don't be a fucking whiny bitch about it and get all offended about it with writers who only write x female reader.

Listen, all of us have some weird fantasies here. I myself take even the most sunshine characters and turn them into obsessive freaks who abduct the reader and kill for them. I write for dub-con and non-con which is ultimately just a euphemism for fantasising about a fictional character r*ping me. I fantasise about male characters baby-trapping me sometimes but if any man in real life were to say something to me like I have written fictional characters say to the reader I will scream, bite and get a restraining order. Does that mean that I support everything that I see online? Fuck, no. Let's be real, who does? There are people who are weird and then there are people who are just gross and I usually stay away from those communities because arguing with them will only cost you your sanity because they clearly have none. On Tumblr I usually resort to swiftly blocking such people the moment I read their content and you are free to do the same to me if you don't support my writing.

Heck, I’ve even blocked people who ranted in the tags about Yandere or dub-con/non-con content and claimed that everyone who writes and reads such posts sick in the head because I believe I did them the favor of sparing them to come across my works. Speaking from experience, such people usually don’t avoid but feel the need to insult and lecture so I probably did them a favor by doing what they don’t want to do because they thrive on being on what they view as the morally high ground. The block button is there for a reason and not just for fancy decoration after all.

It's been more than 4 years on this app for me and I have grown as a person in real life and strive to do so as I continue each year which is why I have decided to not be a pure people pleaser anymore and only write what I can accept within my own consciousness and what I want to write about. It's my blog, it's my rules and if I can be proud with what I write and accomplish on here then this is how I should continue. To anyone who has requested something with a male reader and is still waiting for it to be answered, I cannot promise you that I will still answer it so you should be prepared that it's going to be most likely deleted. I am unfortunately not the right blog to write what you want but I hope that you can find one who will fill the role that I can't anymore.

[flavoredfaeman]

Okay making my own long post so that I can get out all my thoughts clearly

So to start off 1. I think that queer baiting is a completely useless term, in part because all it is used for is arguing whether or not something is queer enough (in part because queerbaiting is an incredibly rare phenomenon in western media), 2. I think that the way male queerness is treated in Deadpool is unfortunate, and 3. Gay people are allowed to find joy in goofy movies and it isn't that serious.

**this is all my opinion, a lot of these topics are up to personal interpretation just like with any other movies or media discussion (I am trying to also cover multiple perspectives here, but I am only one person)

Let's get one thing clear right off the bat, no one who is familiar with marvel and disney actually thought that Deadpool and Wolverine were going to kiss/fuck nasty/become an item. (Those were jokes guys.) Those of us who were hoping for queerness were hoping for some subtext at most or the Deadpool-typical type jokes where he smacks a guy's ass, makes a quippy comment and moves on. And within that context of expectation, we were given way more than we expected.

Now, I will say that it is absolutely sad that we can have these movies with gay jokes, but that actually portraying queer characters seems to be too much for them. As is typical (to my knowledge) of bigger movies, they were allowed to make a side lesbian couple (this is a much larger topic, but for the purposes of this conversation, let me add on: cishet men think lesbians are hot + women are not considered to be able to have "real" relationships without men. So they can get greenlit a bit easier.), but Deadpool is not allowed to have meaningful connections to other men.

Deadpool's jokes about gayness can be interpreted in different ways. To some people, they feel hurtful and deriding. To others, they are the jokes made by a man who is comfortable in his identity, and who makes jokes to take power away from people who may want to use his queerness against him. It's really hard to argue this one way or the other, since Deadpool isn't a real person who we can ask to clarify. As such, how one feels about these jokes usually sits within the context of how they view Deadpool and the movies in general. Personally, I think that these jokes are meant to shock audiences, but I don't think they are actually intended to be hurtful. Especially when the funny part of most of the jokes is when he is making them, not that it's gay. Like, straight or gay, it's funny to talk about sex in a really emotional/tense moment, or in the middle of a fight. Particularly when you see how he treats the other queer people around him, not to mention, you know, the fact that he's canonically pansexual. (Frankly I find it kinda weird to go "aah there's a queer man making jokes about being a queer man!! How terrible!!" but that's my prerogative)

From movie 2 to 3 there does seem to be a change in how queerness is being treated. A positive change, in my opinion. Because Deadpool isn't making all that many jokes in this one, he's got a few for sure (Wolverine has one or two as well!!) but a lot of what he's doing is becoming genuinely close to Wolverine. This shifts the dynamic, now it's not just Deadpool making gay jokes or advances to people who don't really reciprocate (to my memory, though I feel like Colossus may have flirted back at like the end of Deadpool 2?), instead the jokes are being reciprocated/responded to and the characters are being put on even ground. Wolverine is a realized character, just like Deadpool, so they are able to grow closer over the course of the movie, and form an actual connection and bond. (Also a lot of the gay jokes become "wow isn't wolverine so hot?" jokes)

Important to also add that yes, they do start the movie with a very fraught and tense relationship, they are both very violent characters, Wolverine has crazy anger issues, and Deadpool makes everything a joke. All of these things are important to their characters and story! If you took some of those early interactions out of context you could argue that Wolverine isn't reciprocating or something of the like, but that would require ignoring the majority of the film. They are kinda crazy and impervious characters who have opposite personalities in a high stakes setting, of course they are going to fight and try to harm one another.

As much as it's already been talked to death, it is genuinely important to discuss the metaphors in this movie. Because as funny as the Honda jokes are, that scene is heavily implied to be a sex scene. This is the art of film, what you cannot show the viewer, you must convey some other way. The fight happens to You're The One That I Want, they repeatedly stab intimate places (stabbing as metaphor for penetration), the way they position themselves in the car and through themselves at each other, and the camera panning towards the bumper as the car shakes (a classic fade to black sex move). This is all movie language, and it is vital to understanding what a movie is portraying.

The climax is also very important in this regard, because as camp as it is, they were willing to die for each other and in that willingness they were able to save each other. Like A Prayer is playing, they are holding hands, when Wolverine's shirt explodes Deadpool takes a moment to oggle him despite the fact that they're both getting absolutely electrocuted or whatever.

Now, despite all of this absolutely beautiful subtext, Deadpool and Wolverine do not get together. That is absolutely an important part of this conversation, their relationship is ultimately left ambiguous. But a queer man being in a homoerotic ambiguous relationship with another man, does not a queer bait make.

Vanessa is an important part of this discussion of course - though to preface this, I find their relationship really boring so I don't really remember a lot of what happened between them in the first movie. Deadpool is canonically pansexual, so his relationship with any woman does not make him any less queer. Though, it could be argued that she's been kept around as a character to make sure he's always in or longing for a straight relationship.

Some people have been arguing that the movie ends with Deadpool getting back together with her, which blatantly does not happen. They were in a weird stage of exes being friends at the start of the movie, where she was in a new relationship, and he was still pining. All he does at the end of the movie is go over to her to let her know he cares about her, which could be romantic or platonic - but IS NOT them getting together. And again - even if he still is in love with her by the end of the movie, he is still queer.

In addition, I don't think that Deadpool is monogamous. He's constantly flirting and showing interest in many different people. Now I don't remember if he ever has a conversation with Vanessa about monogamy, so I could be missing an important part of their dynamic. But as it stands to my knowledge, Deadpool being in love with Vanessa doesn't mean he's not in love with Wolverine.

Both of these potential relationships end in the air. And of the two (if we assume monogamy is important) Vanessa said she had a boyfriend, and Wolverine just moved into Deadpool's apartment. So Wolverine is in a much better position to end up with Deadpool than Vanessa is.

It's also good to note that everything we got in this movie was fought tooth and nail for by Ryan Reynolds and the movie's team. There is every chance that Deadpool and Wolverine's relationship would not be implied but rather outright in a world where studio opinions don't matter.

Everything that I've just described is not queerbaiting. A movie with queer people in it canonically, is not queerbaiting. Queerbaiting is when media sells a character/relationship as queer in order to get an audience and then tells that audience that they are not actually queer (usually done incredibly insultingly, think Sherlock). Marvel and Disney do not need to market towards queer people to get an audience, in fact marketing towards queer people is more likely to lose fans, and gain hate. It's also important to note that the marketing hasn't been marketing these two as queer, they aren't almost kissing in material, the cover is a friendship charm, the most they do is address the fact that Wolverine/Hugh Jackman is hot af. So it literally isn't queerbaiting.

Now, whether or not someone is disappointed in the level of queerness is completely up to the individual! Everyone is welcome to their opinions and feelings about the movie, disappointed or delighted. But a movie is not queerbaiting just because you are disappointed.

[g0lightly]

it's so strange to remember that sansa stark and i were both 13 when ADWD was published... but she's still 13 and i'm very much not!

when i first watched game of thrones, i immediately formed an attachment to sansa because i was also 13 and the only girly girl in my rather close extended family. she was instantly one of the most relatable characters of all time to me. sophie turner is not quite two years older than me irl so even when the promotion from my family's tv provider cut off our access to hbo some time after i watched season 1, i always thought of sansa as a peer when she came up in the pop culture osmosis since, well, we were the same age.

i watched the last few episodes of game of thrones with my roommates as a 21-year-old about to graduate from college. what can i say? i didn't want to be left out of a cultural phenomenon! during sansa's coronation, i once again saw myself in her as i stepped into a new phase of life with more responsibility. i also felt proud of her, as if i'd actually watched her progress over the seasons i hadn't (at that point) seen.

five years later, i finally watched the show in full and decided to read the books because i was so dissatisfied with how sansa was written in the latter seasons and heard there was more depth to her characterization in the books. i happened to find the books when i was dealing with the fact that being a (relatively) newly-out lesbian in my mid 20s means going through things that most of my peers went through at book!sansa's age. meanwhile, sansa is a 13-year-old girl going through things that someone my age might go through in the modern world.

reading her chapters helped me reconnect with my 13-year-old self who found sansa so relatable in the first place and now i better understand what i need to do for my inner child as a grown woman. an untold number of my therapy sessions have started with "so i read a sansa chapter this morning..." i mourn the loss of the five year gap because i think the reason grrm wrote so many main characters as children (despite saying he dislikes writing child characters) is to show the impact that one's inner child can have on one's adult self. and it kills me to think we might never see their adult selves dealing with that in canon.

i wish we could see sansa grow up into a (well-written) version of the powerful woman we see her become at the end of got in the asoiaf books but i am not sure the timeline will work that way. i would love to see her as a grown woman taking stock of what she needs to do for her inner child just as i have (with her help, in a way). of course there's fic -- this perspective of sansa very much informs the way i write her in my longfic -- but it makes me sad that we may never get grrm's take on her as a grown woman with full autonomy. because it feels like she grew up with me, you know?

[tiptapismellbullcrap]

Things me and my friend talked about happening in 9-1-1

- Athena and Bobby rent an apartment from Ravi post season 7.

- I also talked about two bottle episodes: 1) the 118 is helping Ravi with setting up some new equipment for the gym in one of his apartment building and they somehow get stuck there and they don’t have signal. And 2) episode begins with buck excited for his first time going to a gay bar while out. “What’s the worst that could happen?!” Cut to the 118 in a holding cell. The entire episode is them trying to figure out what happened at the bar fight.

- Eddie having a buck 1.0 era and realises he’s queer post season 7. He’s just dancing and kisses some guy and is like. w a i t -

- Alternative queer Eddie realisation. Buck gets invested in queer culture, starts listening to Chappell Roan. Eddie, being supportive of his bi bestie’s hyperfixation decides to listen to her music. He listens to good luck babe. Has a “wait is this song about me???” Moment

- also buck Chappell roan related - he starts saying femininomenon every time he hears the word phenomenon

- need Athena and Bobby adopting maddie as well as buck. Like maybe Bobby is still off work and childcare falls through for madney so Bobby takes jee and Mara and is grandpa Bobby. Maybe maddie all stressed about something so Athena invites her to her and mays mani pedi day (w mays permission ofc)

- I want to see more hen and chim being detectives

- sad one but I can see Ravi being left as man behind while Gerard is captain, using the excuse that he’s the newest to be racist. Chim comforting Ravi and being a supporting role bc he’s been through it and knows how awful it can be, and he is not going to let Ravi feel alone.

- Ravi has a group chat with the friends he made while going through chemo. It has a stupid name

- I also need to see ravis friends and family. He has a baby niece through a sister. They live in another state while he lives in LA with their parents, but he is making sure that he is his nieces favourite family member

- may and Ravi bump into each other at a club one night and their friend groups merge into one big extended friend group, the group chat is a mess. Bobby doesn’t realise that the friends that both may and Ravi talk about are the same people for months, he just thinks the weird stories they tell must be more common than he thought

- Harry does community service at the 118. Clipboard buck makes an appearance

-Ravi having good parents and being shocked about the 118s bad track record when it comes to parents

- lesbian may grant. She gets an athlete girlfriend

[weolucbasu]

So, @da-proti-toku-grem kind of inspired me to make a lengthy post, sharing some positive vibes across the fandom, listing the reasons why I love each member of Joker Out and why I would go full mom-mode on them and cook for them and bake them gluten-free cookies.

Anyway:

A Joker Out, brain-rot, appreciation post

(members listed in alphabetical order)

Bojan

First up - as someone who had the chance to see them live, he is an insane performer

His ability to enchant the crowd is insane and you can tell really well that he has great acting abilities too

Watched him in Gospod Profesor too, spot on for someone who is a so-called amateur

His singing voice is... amazing to say the least, it feels really unique

Also, the way he talks, the sound of his voice, the words he uses, his pronunciation, if there were awards for talking he would get one

The languages he speaks, I want to study him, linguistically, he is truly a phenomenon

We of course love a bilingual king

He looks like he has his priorities straight

I also respect him so much for how open he is about his mental illness

I might relate to him a bit too much at times whoops

And the fact that he can somehow befriend literally anyone??? Love that

His friendship with Jere is the main one of course

Oh yeah and the fact that he literally helped people who collapsed at their gigs a few times

Bless him, he deserves all the rest he is hopefully getting

Jan

First things first, I have a soft spot for math guys

And the way he talks about math is fascinating (but you still won't get me to like it Jan)

Cat dad???? We absolutely adore Igor and a man loving cats is such a green flag

I know people say he mumbles a bit and it's hard to understand him at times, but idk, he talks nice and slowly, so it's still really easy to understand him

He comes from my home region, so I am very biased haha

Also, every band needs a guitarist with luscious locks

He absolutely owns the colour red, that colour was invented specifically for him

The nose ring suits him so well too, this man KNOWS what fits him

And if that ends up being jackets with nothing underneath when he performs, THEN SO BE IT

I know people call Kris the lesbian icon, but from what I've seen lesbians are very drawn to Jan as well

Oh, and he gives me Klaus from the Umbrella Academy vibes (I blame the hair and the pink boa)

Jure

Holy shit, sunshine in human form????

The most underappreciated one in the band imo

His surname literally means 'cat' and I am so normal that Jan has called him 'muca'

He also comes from my region haha, bias again

He's really good at filming, he actually shot a few things for RTV (national TV station) and edited them as well, god, talent

Also playing drums... I have sang, I have played guitar, played bass, but drums is something I feel like I could NEVER do, so hats off to you

As @da-proti-toku-grem pointed out, THE MOLE ON HIS LIP? weak knees, yes

He also reminds me of a good friend of mine and I vibe with him so much, I feel like I would vibe with Jure as well

I really don't like the fact that drummers tend to get ignored and I just wish there was more Jure performing content

Though I love it how every time, during Novi Val, he comes to the front and hangs with the others

His hair also looks so soft and fluffy aaaaaa

Again, biased but he resembles my bf the most out of everyone so hmmmm

Kris

The baby of the band! (and the only one in the band I could actually call 'mulc')

In case you didn't know yet, he's half Dutch

And he speaks Dutch, which, as someone who speaks Dutch (in theory, not in practice) makes me really happy

I wish to study him linguistically as well

Also his parents' story feels very close to me, as I'm dating outside of my culture as well

According to him he was menace as a kid and I think we should normalise the fact that you can become a better person as you grow up

But pls don't honk at me on the road Kris, pls, I will cry

The songs he wrote??? NGVOT and Vse kar vem??? Oh boy, I love them, adore them

His holey sweaters are also a vibe

Dutch fans, if you don't shower him and the rest of the band with gifts at their Dutch concerts, I will be mad

Also gotta honorably mention Maks

They gotta be my fav nepo-but-not-really babies out there

Kinda like Maya Hawke?

I am ranting

He also looks like the only member of the band that I would fight, and idk why

Also, I must know if he supports Max Verstappen haha

Minus points for chemistry though, I cannot with that

Nace

Okay everyone

Here we go

We have reached my beloved

I love all of them, but Nace just a bit more

It was love at first sight, I cannot lie

I have a soft spot for bassists and he might actually convince me to try and play bass again

He has been playing it for so long too??? like wow

Oh and of course; THE TATTOOS, BLESSETH BE THE TATTOOS

I will always go feral about his tattoos

At every concert

I know he was the last to join the band but it looks like he fits in so nicely, it's beautiful

Strong mom-codded dad friend vibes

He kinda is the dad of the band haha

And he looks like he gives amazing hugs (lucky all of you who had managed to get one already)

A nice addition to the band

Oh and he's apparently shit at sports which is like... felt

Plus the fact that he wanted to be a vet?

Me too boo, me too, but neither of us is there now

Anway, I'll stop now. In conclusion, this band has my whole heart and they deserve every good thing that happens to them and so much more.

[meatsex]

bit of a hermit in fan spaces myself but re: what you said about how people post about vinny, i also feel kinda perturbed seeing that phenomenon. and yeah it's less of an "i'm a better fan than you" angle and more of a "huh. if i saw people posting like this about me i'd be a little weirded out by it" thing, especially in regards to a guy who's about as present on the internet as any of us are. things like the beautiful butch lesbian post for example are fine i think because it's obviously unserious and i know i personally would just laugh if someone said that about me but beyond that it's like hm. some things can stay inside our heads i think. what can you do about it though i guess lol

its okay, im always open for discussions

i dont mind if people are like ohh hes pretty! or hes handsome (as long as its in non-weird levels) but its nothing else but that, i dont think things like fancams or funny edits or spam of certain funny images is particularly bad (actually im pretty sure vinny would feel weirded about fancams but too little too late i guess) but when its nothing *but* that then it just irks me are you even into the content this guy puts out or what

cuz i got into vinny's content because of his corruptions and i only began to draw him a lot after getting into his band and liking the music a lot and connecting with it at a sensitive time of my life, and again this isnt a im better than you situation is just cant you really do anything else that isnt talking abt this guy's face can you at least not call him things publicly

anyways i probably sound annoying as fuck saying this and like a hypocrite i know i do im not washing my hands here just at least have the decency to not put in public or in front of people that dont want to see it

[mithliya]

This may sound stupid but I promise I'm asking this in 100% good faith and genuine curiosity. If a lesbian is attracted to a transwoman under the impression that they are female, how does learning that they're male change things?

There are some transwomen who pass so well that I genuinely have no idea they're male unless they explicitly say so. I'm a lesbian, and if I were attracted to one of these individuals I would probably lose that attraction once I find out the truth, but why is that?? (It's pretty obvious why if they have a penis, but for the sake of this scenario let's say this hypothetical transwoman has vaginoplasty) I've never seen a neovagina so idk whether they look like the real thing or not, but if they do this whole thing just makes even less sense to me. If someone looks and sounds like a woman I'd be attracted to, with the only physical differences being a lack of internal sex organs and probably slightly off-looking genitalia, why am I suddenly completely unattracted when I find out they're not a woman?? Is it bc of male socialization?? Or do the slightly different-looking genitals make THAT much of a difference???

Once again I am a lesbian I'm not saying that lesbians can or should be attracted to transwomen, I just find human sexuality confusing. This is probably a better question to ask a sexologist or psychologist instead of random tumblr users but whatever.

i have a degree in psychology n im doing my second rn 👍🏾 but i don’t think asking a psychologist or perhaps even sexologist will give u much because research into sexuality is pretty far behind and saturated with bias. in fact the most prominent research you’ll find will be arguing that lesbianism basically does not exist so it’s not like they’d explain the phenomenon ur describing.

anyways, i think it’s the same mechanism as when u might see a guy from afar, think he’s a woman, have interest in him as a result, but lose interest when he comes closer and u realise he’s not a woman. your perceptions are frequently updated to match ur reality (unless there’s dysfunction) so you might think someone is of the same sex & therefore have some interest but finding out they aren’t will remove that internet. vaginiplasty does not actually change someone’s sex nor does it magically result in an actual vulva so i don’t think that’s relevant. if it was purely about genitals then perhaps we would only be attracted to someone when actively seeing them naked.

also i think the awareness that ur actually quite different in terms of reality & experiences can play a role as well

[sidebaxolotl]

Do you know of any good resources for dealing with gender dysphoria from a side B or Y Christian angle (i.e., not affirming sin or encouraging transition?) It's not huge in my life but sometimes it comes up and I wish I had more advice for dealing with it. A lot of the stuff I find is unhelpful because it's just plainly restating the rules with how Christianity doesn't condone gender ideology with no practical advice, is in that "how to talk to your friend who has this issue" pov, or just kinda goes "lol pray about it idk". I 100% know and stand by that biological sex is biological sex and don't think it's possible to change to the opposite sex, nor do I really want to... so it's not a matter of needing to persuade me, but it doesn't change that I still have feelings of stress and of not really living up to or fitting in with womanhood. When I'm around other women it can be really difficult because I feel so profoundly different when we should be similar. TIA

Sorry this took so long, I took the time to talk to a couple of people who had dysphoria in the past and some who didn't to get some insight.

Both the people I had talked to who had it had cited porn as a major reason why they developed it in the first place so if thats not ur experience then maybe this wont be as helpful for you 😅

They did bring up a good point that assessing where you think your dysphoria comes from from a psychiatric standpoint could help you figure out how to deal with it and i was given this link:

https://oncurrentevents.substack.com/on-gender-transition-and-psychiatric-disorders

Like for example it was pointed out to me that gd presents a lot like body dysmorphia (specifically, like eating disorders and stuff) so u might be able to use whatever coping mechanisms are used for that to help. It also seems to be a prevalent phenomenon in autistic and adhd individuals so perhaps addressing those things if you have them would help.

I was also linked to this book, the friend in question had remarked that it had helped a lot of the women he knew:

https://a.co/d/6DNWdA2

The guy I talked to said therapy had helped him as well as support from God/ his family but finding non affirming therapists that have a nuanced view on things is extremely difficult, esp if you want a Christian one. Him and I were extremely lucky in that way.

The one woman i spoke to said she quit porn and sobered off gd feelings once she realized transitioning wouldnt truly make her a boy.

I did want to be a boy when i was really young but im not super sure that counts? Idk.

For me what helped was realizing a lot of what made me not want to be a girl at that time was just a reaction to stereotypical gender roles and sexism towards women. Once i started challenging those perceptions and the ways my brain was affirming them i became way more comfortable in my body.

I also had a similar realization as sibling that I'd never truly be able to be a boy if i tried to alter my body. I could wear blue and be the night in shining armor and be a hero and still be a woman, yknow?

Also a lot of it was me being very gay and not realizing it lmaooo

I can def relate to not really fitting in with women--particularly in Christian settings I'm typically the only one who isnt hyperfemme and it can be a bit alienating.

Realizing i wasn't straight kinda helped too since the lesbian perception of womanhood is a lot more fluid than its straight counterpart. Not saying to "go gay" if you aren't but maybe looking into butch and gnc communities and framing your self-perception in that way might help?

If there are any other side b dysphoric folks reading this feel free to chime in with your own tips/resources in dealing with this stuff please!!

[kittzuxp]

Intro post!!!

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About me

Hi hello, you can call me kittzu/kittz/dream/drem or dremzyzz. I use any pronouns in all languages!! Also i am greek🇬🇷🇬🇷

I am a minor‼️‼️ DONT BE WEIRD.

My fav colors are black, red and teal :3

My fav animals are cats, frogs and bats :33

Yk what. I. Am. Done with gender. Genderfluid, lesbian and aspec (probably aceflux, aegosexual and demiromantic) . If u don’t like it FUCK OFF WHAT R U DOING HERE

I can be pretty shy sometimes but always open to making new friends!! (・・;)

Dnis/ do not interacts: z00s,p3d0s, homophobes, transphobes, TERFS, MAPS, racists, xenophobes, anti-therians, anti-furries, radqueers, proshippers, 'superstarights' etc and any hate groups in general.

Also @/guess-who-69 sorry

🇵🇸🍉 FREE PALESTINE

4 more info click here

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Fandoms & interests

I like reading (warriors) and drawing, but also browsing the tube. Oh and comics can't forget about those (currently reading homestuck)

I am in a loooot of fandoms but not really active in them cuz… most of them are dead..

BUT!! I have a couple of things that are currently rotting my brain (fandoms I'm hyperfixating on + active fandoms)

Brain rot real

Stardew Valley [foams at the mouth my brain is rotting]

Twomp/ the world of mr plant

Regretevator

Mob psycho 100

Sofita / johnypeace, thanakios [IF YK THIS ONE FOLLOW ME IMMEDIATELY AND DM ME SOMI CAN FOLLOW U TOOO]

Homestuck [NEW!]

Active

Ghost eyes

Sally face

The song of achilles

Ouk an lavois para tou mi ehontos (if you know this one lets get married/j)

Lacey games

Clan gen (warriors fan game by @/officialclangen)

Tgcf

Diary of a wimpy kid [doawk fanfics: Dysfunctional perspective, Rodrick's secret on the loader diper subreddit]

Unfamiliar (comic by lavendertowne pls go read it)

OMORI

Deathnote

Webtoons(/tapas) [Jackson's diary, Castle swimmer, Your wings and mine <- go read these they're awesome]

KinitoPET

Ramshackle [The webtoon & yt series]

Inactive

Warriors

Ninjago

God troubles me!

An extremely goofy movie

The Boiled One Phenomenon (PHEN-228 is my pookie ❤❤)

Salad fingers

Minecraft (the game)

Helluva boss

South park

Deltarune & undertale

The amazing digital circus‼️

Fionna and cake

Stranger things ☹️☹️ (I'm trying to not to associate the actors with the characters as to not ruin the show 4 me. I will be boycotting s5 tho)

Sonic prime

Heartstopper

Batim

Toh

Sr pelo’s content in general [spooky month and the mokey series]

Saiki k

Good omens

YuB (a youtuber, please go sub to him he’a so silly)

Love, Sam (indie horror game)

Former yandere simulator fan. After the shit with yandev happen i don’t support any of his content anymore.

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Socials & tags

My discord is: forknifeistrash#1419

My wattpad: apersonyoudontknow7

My Ao3: Kittzuxp_the_pidgeon

My Artfight >ω<

Sideblogs: @lovrclan-gen @ask-lovechild-au-twomp

I don’t use it very often, but i’m also on the twompcord and clan gen server. I’m not active on the servers tho..

Tags i’ll use:

Kittzu's headcannons = pretty self explaintory, headcanon I made

Kittzu's Mr plant plushie = he's here!!!!

kittzu's argos plushie = i am legally forced to put this tag under the mr plant one.

kittzuxp = reblogs and posts (fast reblogs do not count)

Kittzu’s enderman plush (i have an enderman plush, if you want any related content, i’m sorry for advertising i just love ‘em so much)

Kittzu's creeper plush (i also have a creeper plush!!!)

Kittzu doodles = any of my art

Kittzu answers asks = do I need to explain?

storytime with kittzu = me sharing my memories and expiriences with the world. I want to leave a mark that i was here and that my existance is not forgotten. Philosophical much?

kittzu's ocs = working on a masterpost abt my ocs but there's this tag too

And then just general tags of any fandom i want the post to be abt

(I might tag your username if i don’t mention you in a post, so beware)

[🔼by @/oxceen]

[chaifootsteps]

Spicy

The anons who want to bring up James seem to think that is where I got my numbers. James is wholly misogynistic thinking women are the problem for the gay male community. He's wrong. I've said it before, I'll say it again: no type of misogyny like gay men misogyny. HB reeks of it.

That doesn't change the fact that in terms of media consumption they make up the statistical majority and unfortunately the statistics are also likely they themselves are fem aligned as see the statement as an attack on them specifically. As a lesbian woman who also, obviously, consumes BL and MLM, that's just the statistical facts. It isn't a value judgment.

I only meant a value judgement in terms of the word Fujoshi, or as the comment or on a response post said, Fudanshi. I also specified not all BL fans fit that term. But the point remains how BL is often written with this psychosexual aggression towards men considered "feminine" (skinny, short, flamboyant, etc) is a fascinating normalization of abuse in the audience. That's all.

It's a psychological phenomenon that no one seems ready to want to address.

Don't mind me. Just passing this along, as I do.

[kattahj]

More Asian QL reviews! Mostly Thai boys as usual, but a Japanese GL at the end!

KinnPorsche

What's it about? Kinn is the son of a mafia boss. Porsche is a bartender who happens to help him out once, and is then coerced into becoming his bodyguard.

Genre: Mafia action, possibly comedy?

Watch if you enjoy: Mafia tropes. High heat. Belligerent sexual tension that turns increasingly playful with time. Having a very hard time deciding what is or what is not meant to be funny. (I have a feeling some of the stuff I found funny wasn't meant to be.) Emotionally repressed vs emotionally oversharing teenage side couple, with love songs. Kinky dom/sub human pet sidecouple #2. Flamboyant drama queen with mental health issues who may be the most sensible of the bunch. Plot that is all over the place even when it isn't twisty (which it is quite often).

Gayer version of: your local kink club's Bugsy Malone theme night

Recommended? Hm. Yes for its influence, no for actual quality, but yes again if you just want some fun mafia hijinks without having to think or feel too much. And it never gets QUITE as bad again as the first five minutes. In some ways it's the worst of the QLs I've watched so far, but it's more entertaining and memorable than several of them. And ironically, it's one of the shows I've found myself writing fic for.

Watched on: Dailymotion

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dZvpNreGVOc

Laws of Attraction

What's it about? Tinn's beloved niece is hit by a car belonging to the son of senator Thatthep. Opportunistic lawyer Chan first works for Thatthep, but soon finds himself asking questions that puts him at odds with the senator. Despite their different outlooks on life, Tinn and Chan may have a common goal.

Genre: lakorn (Thai soap opera), action, drama

Watch if you enjoy: High suspense. Morally grey protagonist. Warm and righteous other protagonist. Changing your mind completely about at least one character. Having your heart broken and then laughing your ass off within a span of ten minutes. Lots of gay side characters, including a pair of badass lesbians. Best grandma currently on TV. Great emotional content. A few laughably bad action scenes and VFX.

Gayer version of: The Pelican Brief

Recommended? Yes! I watched it as it aired and could barely stand waiting for a week between episodes! Just make sure you can cope with dead child, dead dog, dead mom, and parental abuse.

Watched on: bilibili.tv, but it is also up on youtube. (It just didn't add subtitles fast enough for me.)

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Wo7IKw9dWY

La Pluie

What's it about? A world in which, during the rain, certain people can hear the voice of their soulmate – and ONLY that. But is the soulmate thing really real, or just a way to explain an inexplicable phenomenon?

Genre: Romcom/drama

Watch if you enjoy: Nice people solving their problems nicely and with very little unnecessary drama. Subversion of both soulmate and BL tropes (though ultimately bending to the foregone conclusion). Loving families. Understanding exes. Sometimes a cat.

Gayer version of: I want to say TiMER (2009), but that film was a whole lot messier. This is sweet.

Recommended? Kind of? I think it's well done for what it is, but that twelve hours of low-stakes relationship drama, where every crisis is averted, was a bit long for me personally. Plus, it turns out that I don't like soulmates even when they're being turned upside down and shaken around. But if the premise seems like something up your alley, I thoroughly recommend it!

Watched on: Dailymotion

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tz9HG8MGF8M

To Sir, With Love / Khun Chai

What's it about? It's the 1940s, and Thailand is at war. Mr. Song, the wealthy but elderly leader of the Five Dragons association, has two sons with two different wives. Yang is the cheeky rascal, Tian is the obedient and hardworking one. Tian, as the eldest, is set to take over business, and all would be well if not for one little secret: he is gay. If this becomes publicly known, it could ruin the reputation of the whole family.

Genre: soap opera

Watch if you enjoy: More JamFilm after Laws of Attraction, with Film in a radically different role. Brothers supporting each other. Overcoming homophobic surroundings. Rivalling soap queens who will literally walk over corpses for power – and supposedly for their sons, who want none of it. Magic murder mushrooms and other glittery potions. Obedient business heir vs. taciturn assassin gay romance. Feisty het side romance with a lady love who is so sweet and soft spoken that you underestimate what an absolute MVP she is. Acting that ranges from fantastic to terrible. (Looking at you, Nuan!) Absolutely stunning costumes.

Gayer version of: Dynasty, but also I Claudius (what with all the murder).

Recommended? Ye-es? It's more soap opera than BL, so keep that in mind. And there's a lot of Rich People Bullshit. But if you're okay with that, I do recommend it! It ate my brain for several weeks, after all. And if you liked Laws of Attraction, you absolutely MUST see at least a couple of episodes, to experience the whiplash of the difference between Film's roles in those two shows.

Watched on: YouTube

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B3goS7DVeto

Gay OK Bangkok (Seasons 1 and 2)

What's it about? A bunch of friends, boyfriends, hookups and acquaintances, and how they handle their relationships and life's other issues.

Genre: slice of life

Watch if you enjoy: People who feel like actual people. Down to earth relationship drama that doesn't necessarily end well for everyone. Compassion towards the characters even if they're sometimes being dicks. Multiple PSAs about HIV prevention. A relatively short run. (Season 1 is 5x30 minutes, season 2 7x45.)

Gayer version of: Oddly enough, I want to say 90s Degrassi. (The fact that Degrassi was the first show I ever saw that handled HIV may have something to do with it.)

Recommended? Yes! Season 1 is absolutely brilliant, and only some technical issues (soundmix, lack of subtitles for written info) kept me from putting it among my absolute favourites. Season 2 has more and longer episodes but less of a red thread, which means that while all the individual scenes are still well written and well acting, the first half in particular feels a little aimless. But it comes back swinging in the last few eps, and I have also seen viewers who preferred season 2 over season 1!

Watched on: YouTube

Trailer (sorry about the double subtitles): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M3CJ9PiSSR0

Tsukuritai Onna to Tabetai Onna / She loves to cook, she loves to eat

What's it about? Nomoto's hobby is cooking, but she lives alone and always ends up making too much food. One day, she notices how much food her neighbour Kasuga brings home and gets an idea: maybe Kasuga would like to eat some of what she cooks!

Genre: romcom

Watch if you enjoy: Sweet, understated, tentative romance. Lots and LOTS of cooking/eating scenes. (Don't watch while hungry! Do watch to get kitchen inspiration, if you are so inclined!) Lesbian self-discovery. Lots of serious issues in a fluffy setting: class, misogyny, heteronormativity, fat shaming, family hierarchies, and more.

Gayer version of: Julie and Julia

Recommended? Yes! It's very sympathetic and not very long (10 episodes of 15 minutes). The ending is a little unresolved, but fortunately there's a second season promised for 2024.

Between this and Old Fashion Cupcake, I do wonder if all Japanese QLs double as food porn...

Watched on: Dailymotion

Trailer (no subtitles): https://mubi.com/en/films/she-loves-to-cook-and-she-loves-to-eat/trailer

[cantarella]

The way (other than the femslash girlies) the only ppl (rightfully!) calling out all the misogyny against furina from the fans and the leaks and those weirdo redditors is genshin's edition of fandom weirdos who think that #feminism or #misogyny is whether or not fictional women get to be paired with a fictional man or not.... :/

That fandom phenomenon is already weird and loserish even when it's just regular, but these shippers get so damn WEIRD abt their dragon x girl pairing and get very dense abt the story's themes to force the pairing. And ironically half their "ship" posts sound so creepy and misogynistic like......... ok -.- ...... Sometimes it feels like a window to #those otakuweeb forums the way they talk abt her character model

The way so many irritating things with this AQ series & fan reaction can all be traced to 1 character. They shoulda made a grandma dragon instead and maybe none of this woulda happened.

for realll like it's unbelievable how nobody outside of the femslash bubble is on her side and those who do are just. radfems. or haven't grown out of their black butler phase and project onto her to thirst on neuvillette. which is insane enough as it is he's like a sad candelabra to me not an object of desire but that's my lesbianism talking. anyway

this is why I don't associate with the people who like focltte bc not only this pairing makes me uncomfortable bc of how I read their dynamic, but they're also so fucking weird about what's clearly a fetish thing. just say you're into size difference and age gap but noo they have to be aggressive about it bc if you don't think they're meant to be then you're a misogynist bc how Dare you think furina is a teen. which I mean I think "teen out of her depth helped by a wiser adult man" is a more charitable read of her than "adult woman playing dumb to not be held accountable while her boyfriend does all the work" but ok sure you do you

also the way they keep their eyes shut about everything going on on screen to support their fuckass pairing is so annoying. like the fact furina has a quote about the whore of babylon in her profile and they were like "omg forbidden lovers <3" first of all the whore of babylon is a misogynistic story that has been used in sistemic violence why would you want that for her. second of all it's a fucking metaphor for a city betraying it's ideals and/or outside invasion which is exactly what fontaine's aq is about. you people are out of your minds and also idiots

anyway while neuvi related drama isn't the only argument that makes no sense I've seen come out of fontaine (wrio being accused of psychologically torturing the fatui spies who infiltrated his fortress will never not be funny to me but that's a topic for another day) I do think hyv should atone in the deepest pits of hell for adding men in their games bc it attracted the worst kind of people. when will I be free of this mortal coil

[thebreakfastgenie]

tbh i think bj is just a really toxic person and deserves to die alone i don’t get why people ship him with anyone

I don't think BJ is a toxic person who deserves to die alone. I don't think there's anything in the show to suggest that. I think he doesn't always treat Hawkeye well, which is one of many reasons non-toxic beejhawk doesn't make sense to me, but beyond that (and it must be said that's a result of BJ getting some weird writing) I think he's about on the same level as the rest of the cast in terms of how he treats others. All of them have episodes where they're deeply unsympathetic if you stop and think about it; it's a pretty common phenomenon in comedies.

However, I also don't get why people ship BJ with anyone. Except Peg, because he's already married to her, and like 70% of his character is how much he loves her. I just don't find him shippable at all, because he isn't very interesting, and I don't think he has chemistry with anyone. It's okay that he doesn't have chemistry with anyone, because he's happily married.

I guess some people like to read or write shippy fic about him because they find him attractive. That's a pretty big shipping motivator for a lot of people, though sometimes it's subconscious. I don't get this at all because I find him profoundly unattractive, but I'm a lesbian so take that with a grain of salt.

I just think BJ is boring. I wouldn't stick a toxic label on him, I would label him inert. He's a noble gas. He doesn't react with anything.

Of course if you want to argue he's inherently toxic because he's a middle class suburban white man in 1950s America…. I'm listening.