#also in case it wasnt obvious from my jokes please dont take all of this too seriously

[creweemmaeec11]

I'm not sure what this little snippet is, but enjoy it anyway I guess aha!

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It was about time the hero tried a different tactic. They were tired of waiting for the villain to do something, then showing up to stop it. This time, the hero wanted to stop the villain before anything happened in the first place.

It was genius, really, and was something the hero really should have tried a long time ago.

The only problem, was *finding* the villain in the first place.

It wasn't like the hero had a home adress.

He'd spent nearly two hours scouring the city, hopping from rooftop to rooftop with no sign of anything abnormal when he heard a faint, almost whimpering sound.

The hero was thankful they had heightened senses, otherwise they may not have heard it at all.

They used their super strength to climb up the tall building, continuing to hop a few more rooftops when they froze.

Their eyes landed on the villan. He was sitting on a slightly sloped roof, back against a brick wall where the building continued upward. Their knees where pulled taught to their chest, cape wrapped around them like a blanket to shield them from the chill of the cool night air. One arm was wrapped around their knees, holding their dagger while the other hand was wiping at their face, trying to disperse the tears- *they were crying*.

The hero suddenly felt uneasy. What were they supposed to do here? They always saw the villain as cold, heartless, emotionless but, clearly that wasnt the case. They weren't sure what to do, or even how to feel with that information.

Information they clearly weren't supposed to have, given how high up and secluded this spot was. The villain clearly wanted to be left alone.

But, they were a hero! They're job was to help people and this villain was clearly in distress! He couldnt just leave!

They jumped onto the same roof as the villain, who didnt seem to notice. They were still a good 7-10 meters away from them, but the villain was usually very intune with the environment. The hero had never been able to get even near this close to them without the villain being fully aware.

They were now close enough to use their enhanced hearing to hear the ragged breathes and rapid heartbeat of the other.

The hero took a breath.

"Beautiful night out tonight," the hero offered in a friendly, conversational tone. They were smart enough to know that directly asking what was wrong wouldnt get them anywhere.

The villains reply came in form of a violent flinch and sharp inhale of breath. Their head snapped to look at the hero, shock and... was that *fear* written all over their face?

The villain never wore a mask, much like the hero, but they did usually have a hood down over their face, so being able to see it this clearly was strange.

However, with being able to see it this clearly, the hero could see how red and puffy the area around their eyes were, their cheeks thoroughly damp with tears, their eyes red.

The villain immediately directed their dagger at the hero, scrambling backwards across the roof frantically.

The hero held their hands up, "I come in peace,"

The villain stared at them in shock for a moment, "why are you... what... how long have you been..."

Before the hero could reply, the villain shook their head, steeling their features and pushing themselves to their feet. They wiped their face and took a deep breath, grasping for some sense of composure.

"What do you want?!" They snapped, "Why are you here?!"

Their grip tightened on their dagger.

"Theres no need for that, I come in peace, I swear," the hero tried.

"As if you would ever show up just to chat," the villain hissed.

The hero surveyed the situation. Clearly, the villain, who was usually overly composed and smooth, was distressed.

The villain was doing a good job faking composure, but it was obvious in way their fret twitched, weight shifting from foot to foot, fingers flexing while their eyes darted all over the place. They were one wrong word away from taking off.

Right now, the hero was a threat, and he needed to be seen as not one.

Slowly- very slowly, so the villain could track their movements, the hero sat down on the roof, sliding themselves to sit back against the brick wall like the villan had previously. He bend a knee, resting his elbow on it as he looked out at the city. They didnt look over at the villain, trusting their super hearing to tell them if they moved.

"The view from up here is pretty breath taking," The hero commented casually.

"What?"

"My favourite spots are usually around the inner city, like the tops of the big office buildings, but this spot might be even better, with the already tall building being on a hill and all."

Finially the hero dared a glance at the villain.

They were standing in the same spot, though their posture was more relaxed. They were staring at the hero with a dumbstruck look on their face.

"What are you doing?" They asked, narrowing their eyes.

"I mean, we could talk about the weather if youd rather?" The hero smirked.

The villain glanced away, seemingly considering running again.

"Come on," the hero added, "it's not like you have anything interesting going on tonight,"

"That's a rude assumption to make," The villain replied jokingly, crossing his arms and relaxing more as he glanced at his feet.

"Please, you know if you had something important going on tonight I would have been bat signaled already,"

The villain snorted at that. They gave the hero another look over, before caving and settling back down against the roof.

"Is this your way of telling me your bored? Have I not been active enough for you?"

"Thats- not what I meant," the hero sputtered, causing the villain to chuckle slightly.

The hero glanced over, watching the villain twirl his dagger in the air mindlessly. Or, well, mindedly, considering they were using their telekinesis. But it was twirling in a non threatening way, just spinning in the air like a spin top.

"That's a pretty cool trick," the hero commented.

"What? Oh-" the villain blushed, plucking the dagger out of the air like he hadn't even realized hed been doing it.

"sometimes I wish I had a cooler power," the hero started so the villain wouldnt have to explain themselves.

"Wait, really?" The villan asked, looking at the hero in shock.

"Yeah, I mean, dont get me wrong, enhanced senses and strength are certainly handy, but they arnt as cool as like flight,"

The villain hummed, fidgeting with the dagger in their hands, twirling the tip against their finger.

"Super senses also have their downsides, like when someone is trying to surprise you by baking you something, but you can smell it before you even get in the house,"

"I get the feeling theres a story there,"

"Friends tried to throw me a surprise party, I could hear them shuffling and whispering from down the hall, and I could smell the cake and such,"

"Only a hero would view not being able to be surprised as a *downside*" the villain replied, rolling their eyes.

"I guess I shouldn't complain though, it helps with being a hero a lot, without the hearing I probably wouldnt have heard you,"

Out of the corner of his eye, the hero saw the villain immediately tense, bristling slightly.

"Is that why your here? Doing this? You think I'm someone in need of saving?" They hissed.

"Partly," the hero admitted, "I dont think anyone deserves to be alone when there upset, but I'm also making sure you arent up to anything dastardly,"

"Oh yeah, I'm always doing something villainous alright, like crying on a rooftop," they replied mockingly, before realizing they were admitting to crying.

"I wont pressure you into an answer, but you know I have to ask..." the hero replied after a moment of silence.

"Theres no way-"

"Before you turn me down," the hero interjected, "consider I'm one of the few people who may actually understand, considering the uh... line of work,"

The villain stared with a blank, unreadable expression for a few moments, before huffing and looking off to the horizon again.

"Its the anniversary of something. That's the only information your getting,"

The hero hummed in response, continuing to look off into the horizon. They both stayed silent.

In the end, it was the villain who broke it.

"I need to go." They stated, standing up.

"oh really? Where are you off to?" The hero asked with genuine curiosity.

The villain shot them a baffled look, "you know I'm not going to tell you that... right?"

"Oh,"

"Your weird, hero,"

"Why thank you," The hero joked.

"Until next time," The villain stated, before stepping backwards off the roof.

"Farewell!" The hero called.

Things were... different after that night.

Second part here!

[toutallyahoe]

Hi! I dunno if you're still taking requests but, can you please do a soft headcannon with Castiel? (i don't even know if you're watching supernatural :,] )

a/n: tbh, i havent watched supernatural, like, at all. so, this will be hard since my only knowledge in this series came here, in tumblr, and wattpad lmao

i would have declined this but seeing how everyone is raging on supernatural's destiel ship finally canon but in the worst possible way— your boi here has enough of the big sad™ so heres some fluff hon <3

note that all my fics here are (top) male reader inserts uwu

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Castiel is absolutely fucking smitten with you, [name]

he may not realized it as being down here on earth is still new to him, but he is absolutely smitten as fuck

emotions are weird to him, okay?

so, expect Castiel to be a bit oblivious to his own feelings

he is lowkey very obvious though

coming to your aid, even the tiniest things

like that one time you literally just fucking tripped on a parking lot and Castiel was ready to carry your ass around

Dean and Sam was having the time of their lived when you were desperately trying to make Castiel understand that you arent frail or uninjured (youre a hunter to for his father's sake)

but yeah, he worries a lot

Castiel will also answer your prayer/call in a heartbeat. like, no joke

Castiel would drop anything he is doing just for you. he's to smitten to say no

Castiel is also a bit more affectionate to you

take note that you both arent still together, but he enjoys holding your hands

it makes him feel... Castiel cant really pin point what he was feeling, but it was nice

you make him feel safe, like the world he existed in wasnt all that bad

heaven didnt get fucked up, his brothers and sisters were alright and like, everything was just fine. youre his safe haven

if he wants to and if you dont mind, Castiel enjoys cuddling

he's the little spoon, btw

it makes him feel safe in your arms

when you have nightmares from your past or some horrifying case, Castiel will be by your side, comforting you

he'll awkwardly pat your back and remind you that him and the Winchesters are always here for you

Castiel would hug you then and rub circles on your back if you continue to cry or feel down

he may be clueless at times on humans, but boi knows what to do (at times) and will learn for you

[lisalisalisalisalove]

(1/2) Is it just me, or does nobody talk about the racism in Lisa: the Painful? I liked the series for a good few years, most of its slipped my mind by now, but looking back on it - the entire premise of Bloodmoon Mountain is horrifically racist. There’s the antiblackness sprinkled around the game of course, but I feel like the racism goes overlooked when talking about Painful’s flaws.

(2/2) It’s a little conflicting since there’s things that the game does really well, like depictions of complex trauma for one. I don’t know. You honestly just seem like one of the more (if not, most) normal Lisa fans so I wanted to hear your thoughts. Feel free to delete or ignore these if you’re not comfortable responding though.

this is one of many very sad drawbacks of the games niche appeal; because it stayed popular primarily in circles where people either didnt notice the racism or didnt care about it (i.e. /v/), its an oft unmentioned issue with the game.

i actually did talk somewhat at length about the bloodmoon tribe already and imma just leave it at what i (and that other anon LMAO) said before cause i think we covered it pretty well. its an extremely lazy and stereotypical section of the game, and i do find this extremely frustrating because the area itself is VERY cool and the music goes off. but even taking the bloodmoon tribe out of it, the other depictions of indigenous characters throughout the game are lazy as fuck too and go the same stereotype route. i dont doubt that he meant for this to be a loving send-up to his home state (he is from colorado, “olathe” is a town name in colorado as well, and obviously there is a sizable native population there), but the execution is just so god awful that any good intentions are lost completely, i think.

as for the antiblackness, i DO see it and can think of a few scattered incidents of it, but tbh i find the anti-native racism to be much more overpowering in this case. the most racist thing i can think of off the top of my head is rick’s kid being black in an obvious cuckold joke, and yeah that was pretty god awful, but im at least appreciative that the scene ends very quickly (and if im being honest, i actually didnt get this for a while after playing the game and thought the joke was that the kid was adopted but rick was pretending he wasnt LMAO).

theres also the moment when salvation black says “no race jokes please!”, but as mentioned in the other ask, thats a reference to the old rumor that the black power ranger quit due to being given a color stereotypically associated with his race. i dont consider this one particularly racist on its own

that aside, if memory serves there are a few black characters (rick’s kid included) who have red lips, but i actually think this is less an issue with austin actively using an antiblack stereotype and more an issue of his design style. a LOT of his character sprites have red lips, both big and small, and the majority of his sprites are white (or at least, not visibly characters of color), so its obvious that hes just like. taking some of those characters and making them brown instead, without actually considering the ramifications of those same traits on a brown character. yikes LMAO

again this is not to excuse any of this stuff, as its all pretty bad and he ABSOLUTELY shouldve had someone vet this shit before he published it; this is just the impression i get as a fan and as someone who has played this game entirely too much. i think an actively racist voice wouldve had a lot more malice behind it and come up much more often, but the majority of these cases are very blink-and-youll-miss-it, which i guess is what makes it so easy to not realize theyre there in the first place (with the bloodmoon tribe being the obvious exception). i do love this game with all my heart, but if he ever does rerelease it i sincerely hope he does a fuckton more research, ideally WITH actual people of color, and improves or removes this stuff entirely. this is definitely something fans need to be more aware of, and i think if he was to be open about it and admit he fucked up, it would really speak well on who he is as a person.

[gundhams-pandemonium]

Okay, Yasuhiro Hagakure hc/anaylsis/rant:

[PS: I belive in UDG we get more insight of his past and his Mom, however I've not played and I wish to remain as spoiler free as possible]

Starting off that I have the opinion he 100% deserved to be a survivor. Yes, others deserved development But that can be said for almost every single person in the DR game. Also, he did deserve development too. Anyhow-

I'm stating something controversial here; Hiro was smart, particularly a smart buisness/slight con man. You may be thinking I'm joking, but I'm not. I'm very serious

One of his most famous lines is his "I'm accurate [about his predictions] 30%, 100% of the time" This line is seen as silly since us as players will read this, reread this, and see how ridiculous it sounds. However, this statement gets peoples attention But also if saying it quickly/trying to grab someone attention they might not even catch the meaning. Which is big why I said "Business/slight con man" Because that's an opening line that when first heard doesnt sound too bad.

This will cause people to be intrigued by his prediction skill even if it is only ""slightly above average""*. And he says it in such a convoluted way is not to be dumb, but to be smart. 30% 100% of the time are two percentages that when put together will sound reasonable yet intriguing enough to give him a chance.

*""above average"" because Hiro CAN predict the future. He has actual visions [he has one in the Future Arc] so he's not fully a lucky con man.

He even roped Makoto in a few predictions*, Giving him a little bit here and there. Which from a buisness standpoint makes sense, Once you start talking you can really draw someone into what your saying.

*the reason we dont see this as him being smart in these situations is because were in a killing game his actions of trying to get us to pay for his lighthearted predictions seems frivolous. It seems that even in being friendly that he doesnt turn off his buisness mode. Which knowing that he's lived in poverty/always had to worry about money makes sense; and again, is a S m a r t thing.

Also, Hiro has no trouble talking to people, and comes across as nom threatening which really helps when trying to sell services. If someone thinks your creepy/aggressive/etc they want support your buisness, however Hiro comes across as an average, chill, dude. Someone you might see at your local cafe, or a neighbor. Many people point to his non threatening, chill attitude as dumbness even though with his line of work it makes sense he has it. If he was in another "normal" profession he'd probably be beat at being a salesman.

On to how him being useless in class trials shouldn't undermine his intelligence. A big one: These Are Murder Cases. These are your average lil mysterious of "Oopzie Woopzie someone broke the Coffee pot" There is a dead person. Not only that but if they point the finger at the wrong person then they all die. So if you fundamentally dont know what to say/dont have much to contribute then not doing so again is a smart course of action. And he still offers up suggestions, he still tries. Which brings me to a few other points

He is very very clearly disturbed by the dead bodies, and understandably so. Even when they were strangers, when he witnessed "Junko's death" and realized that this wasnt an elaborate prank* he panicked. If I rember correctly he either stayed in the gym, and panicked in the corner unable to do more then pray that he'd be safe Or he was in the doors right outside the gym. He was scared, and that doesn't make him less intelligent. His reactions were very normal, especially since despite being in a buisness/trying to get money/etc he tries to be a good person. It makes sense, if he stayed away from the bodies, that he wouldn't be able to add any new information. It takes a lot to investigate a corpse and, again, he shouldn't be looked down on for it.

*some people argue that he's stupid because he didn't realize after Sayaka's death. However, it's not to far fetched to say he hadn't seen Sayaka's body and therefore didnt belive she'd died/believed this was still part of the welcoming ceremony. Could argue naive and optimistic, But being suddenly put in a killing game is a very farfetched thing into he first place.

I'd end there, But I know people dont just think he's dumb because he doesn't contribute too much to the trials. Otherwise another character would be accused way more. That character even helps lead us to the icing on the cake of "why people think Hiro's stupid".

The character in question; Kyotaka Ishumaru. Most of what he says in the trial is either obvious or unhelpful. Does this make Taka less smart? Of course not! But there are several differnt kind of smarts, and neither Taka nor Hiro have "trial smarts".

This brings me to my final point: While Hiro is not book smart either that still doesn't mean he isnt smart. I get so frustrated when people use smart only to mean book smart, especially since I can go on with how much school systems screw over students/neordivergent people/people with less money/etc But I won't for the sake that would be a long non Danganronpa related several paragraph rant.

In short: Yasuhiro is smart in his buisness/and the techniques he uses. He may not strictly be book smart, nor in trial, yet he is not a "complete moron" and "didn't deserve to survive" [Idk how many times I've seen that last point...]

(Thank you for reading this, and please reblog if you found it interesting!)

[nia-journals]

Blind Date | YOONMIN Short Story

——————

park jimin sat in the cushioned chair, blind folded, wearing his casual best, in hopes of impressing whichever stranger his partner turned out to be. you see, his best friend jeon jungkook, had dragged him to one of those blind date events taking place in their city and now jimin sat like a complete idiot and for what? why was he trying so hard? he told himself he couldnt care less about this outing so why did he even bother wearing his best jeans?

jimin sighed and as the countdown on the intercom reached 0 he could hear footsteps approaching. this made jimin a bit anxious. his eyes were bound, he didnt know where in the room his friend jungkook sat and in less a second he would meet a complete stranger he’d spend the rest of this forsaken date with. jimin’s fight or flight instict ticked as he felt someone walk dangerously close to his chair. why the fuck did he agree to this? jimin thought, it was safe to say that whoever came up with a blind dinner date pop-up event was a complete idiot. he now sat in high alert waiting to defend himself despite the circumstances and the obvious fact that he couldnt see anything at all.

so he sat and waited; jimin was beginning to think he’d been stood up even in this stupid blind date. that is, until he heard;

“hello?” a stranger with a deep voice approached him, “im min yoongi,” his voice was eargasmic, it made the little hairs on jimin’s arms stand up and sent chills down his back.

“park jimin,” jimin introduced himself in a shy and unsually low tone. jimin wasnt usually shy but this man’s voice alone made him feel small, intimidated and dominated even.

“should we get right to it?” the stranger’s disembodied yet gravelly voice suggested, “i cant really ask you what you like to eat cause that’s against the rules so, ima take a hunched here and hope you enjoy it. is that ok jimin?”

jimin nodded like an idiot, in a trance. unlike five seconds ago now jimin mentally thanked whoever’s stupid idea was to wear blindfolds cause if not yoongi would be completely exposed to his dialated pupils which signaled his lovey dovey eyes.

“ok, i placed the order. when it comes out please be completely honest with me,” yoongi said, after quietly thanking who i assumed was the server, “i promise i wont cry too hard.”

yoongi’s chuckle.

wow.

that was the most beautiful sound jimin’s ears have ever had the pleasure of hearing. the captivating sound was light and addictive, jimin wanted yoongi to chuckle all throught the night.

“don’t worry yoongi,” jimin let out instinctively. it didn’t matter how nasty what yoongi picked out for him was, he would lie, cheat, fibble, he would do anything to get a shot at a second date with this stranger with the honey dipped voice, “i wont go too hard on you.”

“no, please do but maybe lie about it to the host and we can always try again on our second date.”

jimin smiled, maybe a little too widely and he had to quickly remind himself that yoongi could still in fact see the idiotic smile plastered on his face, “already in for a second date? are you that whipped already?”

“i mean, look at you, park jimin. youre a whole vision in itself. i could sit here all night and talk about how perfect you look.”

“you havent even seen half of my face yet min yoongi,” jimin scoffed in a joking manner.

“fair enough park jimin,” he spoke in a tone of newfound confidence and determination, his voice dropped about two octaves and jimin again froze at how deep and addicting it was to listen to min yoongi’s voice, “let’s get to know eachother before our meal comes to us.”

“fine,” jimin said clearing his throat, “that sounds fine by me.”

“are you from this area jimin?” yoongi asked in his husky tone. fuck this man’s voice would surely be jimin’s demise. he couldnt wait to take his blindfold off to reveal the face of the stranger whose voice had jimin wrapped around his finger.

“no, im actually from busan. i moved out to seoul with some of my friends for school.” jimin said.

“you all go to the same university?” he questioned.

“yeah we do. we all applied together and got in together so we just moved in together and attend the same school,” jimin shrugged. he was infact lucky to have friends who shared similar interests and life aspirations. lucky enough that after high school graduation while everyone waved goodbye to their bestfriends, jimin, taehyung and jungkook were packing together ready to take on the next four years of college right by eachother’s side.

“youre very lucky,” yoongi confessed, “not many people get to attend the same school as their bffs after high school. usually people grow apart.”

“yeah im glad i have them here with me. i’d be a lone wolf in seoul if it wasnt for them.” jimin said. “one of my bestfriends, jungkook, was actually the one who dragged me here?”

“wait are you an introvert park jimin?” yoongi questioned. jimin couldn’t see much of yoongi but he could feel the subtle movements the stranger made in his chair at the other end of the table.

“im as introverted as they come. it took a whole lot of will power, a lot of convincing by my friend jungkook and a million pep-talks from our dorm room to here to get me to calm down a bit,” jimin confessed.

“are you nervous right now jimin?” he let out in a soft yet deep under-tone. his whispering made him sound like an asmrist and jimin wasn’t sure he could handle listening to him talk im such a low tone any longer.

“well i was nervous yoongi, but-“ he began, “your voice.”

“what about my voice?” yoongi asked and jimin could almost hear the cockiness in his voice.

“it’s soothing yoongi, it’s really calming my nerves,” jimin was completely transparent with the man. well of course jimin hid the fact that aside from calming him down a bit, yoongi’s voice also aroused him. that detail he could definitely keep to himself, “in that case i’ll keep talking,” he was definitely now going to begin using his sweet and deep voice against jimin for the rest of the night, “what do you study in school, jimin?”

“dance,” jimin let out, “contemptorary dance to be exact.”

“have you danced for long?” yoongi questioned.

“since i was 9 years old.”

“so youre a professional?”

“i wouldn’t say so, i have a long way to go to be considered professional.” jimin answered modestly.

“i bet your the best in your whole university,” yoongi complimented him in such a casual tone.

“well thank you,” jimin said shyly, yoongi surely knew all the right things to say, “but im not even the best in the whole junior class,”

“i find that hard to believe. on our second date how about you show me your moves?” the butterflies in jimin’s stomach were out of control at yoongi’s blatant proposition.

but at that moment jimin promised himself that he would go dancing with yoongi on their second date.

“let’s take it one second at a time yoongi, i dont even know if i like the food you picked out for me yet,” jimin teased him, “what if it was a complete miss?”

“it won’t be, my gut never lies to me.” yoongi was definitely cocky but jimin thought that was part of his charm. jimin definitely liked it.

jimin laughed, god he wished he could see yoongi’s face right about now, “what about you yoongi? are you in school? are you from seoul?”

“ah, no-“ yoongi started, “im not from seoul, i was born and raised in daegu. i actually, like you, moved to seoul for school and studied music production. i graduated a few months ago. now i work with my friend who’s an upcoming rapper.”

“congratulations on graduating,” jimin offered and yoongi thanked him in return.

“whats his name?” jimin questioned, honestly wanting to know if he’s heard of his friends work at anytime, “your rapper friend. maybe ive heard the music you guys have made together before,”

“his names rm,” yoongi let out non-chalant but jimin almost chocked on his water.

“you’re friends with rm?” jimin let out in an overly excited tone, “my best friend jungkook loves rm.”

“i could get you two tickets to his next underground show if you’d like?” he asked, his offer sounded sincere.

“i couldn’t-“ jimin let up, “we just met yoongi. i wouldnt want you to have the wrong idea of me.”

“i could never park jimin,” there he goes saying jimin’s name again, it sounded so fucking perfect coming from him and jimin could honestly sit and hear yoongi say his name over and over and over until the sun comes up, “how about this, if you like the food i picked for you, i’ll take you and your friend jungkook to the next rm concert.”

“how about we leave the concert for a third date, i want you all to myself on the dance floor for our second date,” jimin said feeling fearless, teasing him a bit in the process, “well if i like the food you picked out for me, that is.”

“thats a deal park jimin, good thing we’re about to find out.” yoongi said, and less the a second later jimin could smell the delicious food being placed in front of him.

“do you want me to help you with that?” yoongi asked as he noticed jimin struggling a bit to find his fork.

“if you could please,” jimin was about to be fed by a stranger with the most mesmerizing voice. to say his heart was going to beat right out of his chest was no exaggeration.

a couple seconds later, yoongi let out an “open up,” and jimin was met with his favorite kind of pasta, shrimp scampi. jimin was glad yoongi picked out a meal he liked because this meant they had a chance at a second date and jimin couldnt wait.

immidiately jimin clicked the right button under his side of the table signaling he’s liked the dinner picked out by blind date partner. jimin quickly took off his blind fold and after his eyes adjusted to the bright lights in the room he was met with the most beautiful man he’s ever laid eyes on. his tanned skin was honey-like and there was a perfect contrast between his brown sugar skin and his plain white t-shirt. his wide gummy smile made his eyes turned to small crescent moons and at that moment jimin couldnt believe that such a perfect voice belonged to such a perfect human being.

“are you ready to put your dancing shoes on for our second date?” jimin asked as yoongi’s gummy smile grew in size.

———————

this story has very much been alive and well on ao3 give it love there!

thanks for reading <3

[ladyboltontoyou]

Arthur Morgan x Reader: Farmer’s Daughter

Ask: Ok well I was wondering if you could write an Arthur Morgan x Reader where the reader is the daughter of a rich farm owning family and Arthur rides up to the farm/ranch one day to scope the place out and see if they're easy to rob but somehow ends up with heart eyes for the reader and starts sneaking around to see her. Doesn't have to be smut, but that would be awesome. Thank you!

Warnings: Probably cursing. A bit of an age gap since Arthur is, you know, like 30 something, and the reader is still living with her parents.

Pairing: Arthur Morgan x Reader 

A/N: So this turned out longer than I had originally planned oops. ALso apparently freezers were invented around the 1830′s so don’t come at me for having ice cubes in Arthurs drink ok. I really hope this is what you imagined and it doesn’t seem rushed, even though I spent like 4 hours on it. Hope it’s not too short or too long. OKAY I’M DONE RAMBLING YOU CAN READ NOW.

The last thing you expected to see on a Friday afternoon was a stranger on a white horse riding up your dirt road. You had been reading a book on your upstairs balcony when you saw him, at first just a small white speck a ways away. But when that white speck started making noise you looked up and saw it was a man on a horse, a visitor. You rarely got visitors here that weren’t two men on a wagon full of supplies. 

You set your book down on the table and leaned forward to get a better look as he neared the front of your house. He looked handsome enough, even though you were on the second story balcony and he was on the ground below. From what you could see he was a rugged man about thirty or so, not the kind of men your parents usually dealt with. Your curiosity got the best of you and you walked back inside and downstairs where you saw your father opening the front doors. One of his work friends stood beside him in case things were to go south, his hand sitting comfortably on his pistol as a gentle warning to the stranger that stood on your porch.

“Sorry to bother you folks, I was looking for the Braithwaite manor and it looks like I got myself lost. Do you know whereabouts that is?” His voice sounded so friendly and warm, you would never expect that he was there to see if you would be easy to ransack. You watched the conversation go down from the bottom step of the staircase and tried not to look too obvious. 

Your father was totally oblivious and way too trusting. “No worries friend, these back roads are tricky. Fancy a drink? You look like you’ve been riding all day. Come inside and I’ll have my wife draw you up some directions.”

The man looked hesitant but eventually shrugged. “You’re too kind. I’d really appreciate it.” 

You took the chance to walk into the tea room since you knew they’d come inside any minute, and you didn’t want to look suspicious. Plus, you wanted to be nosey, it wasn’t often attractive strangers came by. You sat down at the table and picked up the book from the table, something you had already read before, and tried your best to look as if you had been doing it for some time already.

“Who’s that man outside?” Your mother had snuck up behind you and scared the daylights out of you when she leaned down to whisper in your ear.

“I don’t know.” You said after you recovered from the scare. “But he sure is good looking.” 

She peaked at the front door and nodded in approval at your taste. “You’re not wrong about that.” Thank god it was your mother and not your grandmother, she would have chided you for hours about being indecent. 

Finally, they came in and the man took off his hat, looking around as his eyes adjusted to the change of light. He looked even better looking close up. His facial hair was trimmed neatly but looked like it had grown in a little, the hair on his head the same. His face was partially spotted from the dust in the air from horse hooves but he didn’t look truly dirty, nothing compared to your farmboys.

 He looked around and seemed impressed with the place, his eyes looking into every room he could see from his spot. When he looked into the room your father began walking into, the tea room, he only spared you a short glance. 

Alright, well, you weren’t used to that. Most men who saw you immediately started complimenting your parents on how gorgeous you were, praising you and never failing to remark some version of ‘You’ll make a wonderful wife/Someone a very happy husband/Beautiful children’. But he didn’t say a thing.

“Darling, would you be so kind as to draw some directions from here to Braithwaite manor? Our friend  here has gotten lost.” Your father asked your mother who smiled and obliged, heading upstairs to get some paper. “Oh! I didn’t even see you there!” He said when he noticed you sitting on the couch. ��Could you bring our guest some tea?”

The stranger looked at you and looked like he was about to decline and tell you not to worry yourself but you were already standing up. “Sure thing daddy, need anything else?” You asked sweetly with a smile. 

Your father looked to the man who just shook his head and tried to say ‘I’m fine’ and ‘No thank you’ at the same time. “No, I’m, thank you,” He jumbled over his words and looked visibly embarrassed. “I’m alright.”

You smiled widely, amused by that. He looked away and scratched the back of his head awkwardly. Your father paid no mind and led him to the couch, talking about how harsh the month had been with no rain at all. 

When you got back from the kitchen with a glass of tea he looked up and accepted the glass from you happily, muttering a ‘thanks’ before he almost chugged the entire thing, even chewing on some of the ice. Your mother came down the stairs with a piece of paper in hand and one of your nice fountain pens in the other. 

“You’ll have to excuse my writing, I’m not the best artist.” She joked and sat on the single chair across from the couch. “You should have told our artist here to do it instead, she could draw him the best map he’d ever laid his eyes on.” She joked and you tried not to let them see how bashful she made you. She always bragged about you and anything you did, you could draw something purposefully awful and she would still treat it like a priceless painting.

“Oh it’s alright, I’m sure I’ll manage.” He chuckled, taking more ice into his mouth. 

You sat down on the other side of the couch and watched the man from the corner of your eye. He looked around the house while his jaw moved to chew the ice as if he was taking note of every single window and door. “Say, you folks-”

Your mother sighed in frustration, putting two fingers on her forehead in exasperation. “I’m sorry, I can barely draw a line. Darling, could you please?” She slid the paper across the table and gave you a sweet look.

“I’ll try.” You laughed and leaned down, taking the pen from her.

“What were you saying?” Your father asked from his seat and the man looked confused before he remembered.

“I was just going to ask if you knew of some good people to hire for security. Assuming those men at the end of the road are what I’m thinkin’ they are.”

“Yes, they work for a man named Michael, he hires men that used to be in the war and sells their services to those who can afford it.” Your father said proudly. Arthur just nodded.

“Here’s the house.” You said to the man as you drew a small house next to the scribbles your mother had done. He scooted closer to you carefully and watched as you drew. “And here’s the road. The corn fields are on the right, the tobacco on the left.” You kept talking as you drew and tried to focus on moving the pen instead of how close he was to you. His body heat radiated off of him and grazed your bare arm and neck, you could hear him breathing slowly. He smelt like smoke and day-old cologne mixed with the leather from his coat. 

As you gave him directions he would never need Arthur felt morality tug at his heartstrings. You were such good people, welcoming him into your home and showing such hospitality. He would have to tell Dutch there was no way, there were too many workers and guards, he would make something up. He came expecting a snooty rich family but was caught off guard by good people. You all had the generosity, kindness, and respect of poor folk.

When you finished you slid the map over on the table. “Let it sit for a minute before you touch it, the ink’s still wet.” You warned and put the cap back on the pen. “Especially here.” You laughed softly and pointed at the words of his destination where you had spelled it wrong the first time and scratched it out.

He nodded and muttered an ‘alright’, looking at you from a side glance. Your father talked for a while about the people who lived in the manor, not being shy about his opinion. Arthur couldn’t have agreed more but he kept up his facade and played dumb. 

“It’s dry now.” You said and Arthur looked away from your father. You were looking at the paper so he took the chance to actually look at you, unintentionally admiring you. Normally he was good about keeping his eyes where they belonged. If there was anyone who respected women it was Arthur, but it was hard not to appreciate your beauty. He figured your sweetness was the only reason he stared. It had been a while since he saw a sweet girl who wasn’t trying to pickpocket him or get him to spend a fortune in the saloon. 

“Thank you.” He picked up the paper and admired your work. One of the few things he could really appreciate was art. You drew so effortlessly, the small roads and hills looked like the maps he’d seen the professionals sell. “Well, I reckon I better be on my way, I’ve taken up too much of your time.” 

“Not at all.” Your father stood up and so did the stranger. They shook hands as he thanked your father who shook him off and pat his back a few times. “You sure there’s nothing else we could do for you?”

“You’ve done more than enough.” He promised and looked back to you and your mother, the paper held gently in his hands. “Thank you both for your hospitality. And for the map.” He held up the paper and you smiled, causing him to unknowingly do the same. 

When he started walking out the door with your father you ran upstairs and almost fell off your balcony to watch him ride off. The hot wind hit your face when you reached the banister, just in time to watch him ride off. He put his hat back on and took one last look behind him, not failing to notice the beautiful young girl watching him leave.

***

The frogs and crickets sang while the fireflies lit the black air with soft pulsating gold. You were on your banister half reading a book and half watching the farmboys work in the fields below, their lanterns bobbing gently through the rows of plants, stopping occasionally to pull up weeds or a dead plant. 

It was hard to read. It was stupid to even try. But there was nothing else to do to take your mind off of your thoughts, even though reading wasn’t doing a good job at that. At least it was something.

A dog barking in the distance made you set your book down. It was the dogs they kept up at the end of the road to warn when someone was coming. You waited a minute to see if they would calm down but they didn’t. You heard your father yell downstairs to the men at the end of the road, and they responded with something about deer in the woods. 

You believed it for a moment until you heard rattling from the other side of your balcony. The first thing that came to mind was some kind of greasy gunslinging bastard but before you could start screaming two arms hooked over the side of the ledge, covered by that same damn leather jacket you had been so close to earlier. 

It shouldn’t have made you feel any better considering his original intentions were to rob your family for everything they had. But for some reason you had a feeling he wasn’t a threat to you. That made you incredibly stupid and naive but thankfully, for once, you were right in this situation. 

When he finally pulled himself over he looked surprised to see you standing there watching him. “Now, before you start screaming,” He said as he reached up to grab the lantern that hung above him. “I’m not here to hurt you or anything like that.” He blew out the small flame and the two of you were suddenly surrounded by darkness. 

“Then why are you here?” You asked cautiously. It wasn’t like you didn’t want to see him again, but the last thing you expected was this. If anyone saw him your father's politeness would be out the window as well as Arthur.

He sighed as if he didn’t know why himself. “You been on my mind girl, and I don’t know why. I don’t know why my dumbass thought it would be a good idea to risk not only my ass but yours, just to come back up here and ask for your name.”

You covered your mouth to stifle that bubbled in your throat. “Truly? That’s why?”

Arthur laughed softly, shaking his head when he realized how ridiculous it was. “I suppose so. And I wanted to ask for another one of those hundred-dollar drawings you make.” 

You laughed again and put your fingers on the bottom lip you held between your teeth. “Oh yeah? Was my map that good?”

He grinned and looked down at his boots, kicking them against the floor to kick some pebbles loose from the bottoms. He couldn’t believe how young he felt then, like he was only sixteen again flirting around with the farmer's daughter. The only thing different from that was he was much, much, much older. If the other men in the gang saw him they’d make fun of him till the day he died for sneaking around for a girl. 

“Well, okay, I guess I can make you something.” You smiled while biting your lip. He put on a show of acting grateful, clasping his hands together and placing them in front of his forehead. When you recovered from quiet laughter you went into your room to get some paper and a pencil. You made sure both your doors were locked before you went back onto your dark balcony. You stopped in the open doorway, noticing how little you could see. There was no way you could draw anything out there unless a lantern was lit, but that would be too bright and anyone nearby would be able to see the two of you. “I can’t see out here, maybe we should go in my room.” 

He was reluctant for a minute, considering how fast he’d be able to run and jump out the balcony if need be. “Yeah, sure.” He sighed and walked towards the doors. The spurs on his boots lightly jingled and you could hear fabric moving against fabric as he moved past you into your dimly lit room. “Been a while since I’ve been in a room this nice.” He admitted as he looked around your room. 

“You live in a barn then?” You teased and sat down at the table near the windows. “Oh, I never told you my name. It’s (Y/N).” 

Arthur leaned against the wall near you and crossed his ankles, nodding as he thought over your name. “(Y/N). Never met anyone with that name before.”

You smiled proudly, twirling the pencil in your fingers. “And yours?”

He paused, considering while he looked out the window. “Arthur.” He said finally and looked back to you. 

“Arthur.” You mused before remembering what you were supposed to be doing. “Ah, sorry, what did you say you want me to draw you?”

He snorted and crossed his arms. “I didn’t give that any thought, do anything you’d like.” 

You bit your lip and looked him up and down. “Okay. It might take me a little while though.” He wanted to say ‘good’, but held his tongue and settled for a ‘That’s okay’.

After about an hour of talking, constant talking, you were finally finished. “If I had longer I could have done better, but, here.” You slid the paper across the table to him. After a while, he got tired and had sat down across from you.

He took the paper in his hands and squinted before his eyes widened. “Christ, girl.” He breathed and looked over the lines and shading. “You’re better than me.”

“You draw too?” You asked with sudden interest but he didn’t respond, he was too caught up in the paper in front of him. 

“I can’t believe this. Did you take a picture of me when I wasn’t looking?” He shook his head and scratched his chin as he continued admiring it. 

You blushed and ran a hand through your hair, he made you into a flustered mess with those praises. They were different when they were coming from someone who wasn’t kin. “Thank you.” It was all you could say. You didn’t expect him to like it that much, it was a hurried sketch of him leaning against your wall, but as much as you liked to pretend your art wasn’t that good there was no denying that this was an exceptionally realistic drawing. You were almost sad to see it go.

Arthur shook his head and looked up from the paper, looking at you completely different. Like how your father looked at your mother the first time he saw her shoot a gun. Newfound respect and admiration glinted in those pretty blue eyes of his, all directed to you. He was going to say something else but the sounds of heels coming up the stairway stopped him. 

“(Y/N)! I just found a letter from June, it came yesterday but-” She grabbed your doorknob and tried to open it, only succeeding in causing the door to shake slightly. Arthur looked at you with wide eyes as she called out your name a second time. 

“Go, hurry!” You whispered and he sat up as quickly and quietly as he could, tiptoeing to the open doors. “One second, I’m changing into my nightdress!” You called back to her as you rushed the grown man out of your room.

He paused in the same spot he had climbed up, one hand on the jasmine covered lattice he had used as a ladder. “Could I come see you again?” He asked boldly, the paper in his hand slightly moving from the breeze. 

You laughed in disbelief. “There’s no way I could say no to that. You better.”

Arthur smiled then, the widest and cheesiest smile he had worn in a while. If it wasn’t for the lantern sitting inside your room next to the window he stood near, you wouldn’t have seen it. You wanted to say more, but he swung his legs over the edge and left you to explain to your mother why you spent so long doing something so simple.

[thehalfworld]

Fanfic MST: Forbiden Fruit: The Tempation of Edward Cullen, a Twilight fanfic [part 8]

And here we are at the end. I hope you’ve all been enjoying the ride, because it’s about to get a whole lot weirder in this, the final chapter.

Warnings this time around: a whole lot of drug use, some underage drinking, DUI but it’s okay because Tiaa is a vampire, bestiality, and an attempted sexual assault. Also did I mention drug use? There’s a lot of drug use.

Recap: Tiaa met a panda bear named Snoofles on her way to school (please don’t think too hard about this) and learned that she can now talk to animals, among other abilities. Thanks to a vague new ability of hers, she accidentally made her mean classmate Lauren get struck by lightning while they were in a verbal spat. Edward finally decided to leave Bella for Tiaa and the two celebrated by having sex in the middle of the school. Bella walked in on them and got upset.

Chapter 1

Previous chapter

hey guys sory its been so long since an update, i hav been so busy latley. sooooo..i had a fight with my old beta but i have a new 1 now an she is helpin me byut she is on vacaton this wk and next so i promise i will sort the spellin mistaks out wen i can!

Did she refuse to beta your fic after you stole her poster of Gerard Way?

Chapter 8 - the Kidnap

I sat alone in the changes rooms, i was all most naked and looked awsome with my exotic lithely hair falling down over my face like a curtan of soft yellow cream with bits of purple in it but I didnt care how beautifull or eqxisite I was any more. 

Tiaa doesn’t care how beautiful she is, but she had to start the sentence off by reminding us all how beautiful she is. And that she looks awesome. And her hair is exotic.

Whatever that means.

Edward was gone. he had left to follow Bella to stop her from killin herself and i was SO mad. 

Wait, are you mad Edward is attempting to prevent Bella from committing suicide?

how coud he leave me like that after sayin bella was a cow and he didnt like her no more? 

That doesn’t mean he’s fine with letting her make attempts on her own life, Tiaa.

I was pissed! and the tears were falling down my face like a tepid summer rain of misery and woe. 

I love this goddamn sentence.

So i went home and skipped school and sat in my room in my black corset and leather panties and i smoked some drugs and started to weep. 

To be fair, this is a really solid stoner-goth aesthetic she has going.

…wait, hold up, leather panties? 

Leather panties?

dave came in and made a big smiley face.

He’s in a really good mood for someone whose brother was murdered hours ago.

"hi tiaa! I didnt no you were home! how was school today?" (he didnt notice i was smokin drugs he thougt my cigarete of pot was a chapstick)

Okay, for the sake of argument, I’ll buy that Dave visually mistook a spliff for chapstick… but can he not smell that she’s smoking weed?

"it sucks!my life sucks and i want to DIE!" i scremed and my eyes glitered with beauty.

Love how Tiaa is suicidal but still needs to make sure we know how pretty she is at all times. Reminds me of the bit in “My Immortal” where Enoby was flirting while sobbing.

"u teenagers and ur problems, LOL!" he said laughing a lot, and i knew he thougt i was just some silly kid wineing about homework and dumb boys and stuff. 

Well, replace “homework” with “getting raped by the relative of a caregiver, turning into a vampire, and accidentally seriously injuring a classmate” and Dave’s on the money.

he didnt no i had killed a man and lost the love off my life and had made lauren get hit by lighting and that all the kids at school thougt i was a freak becase my face and bodys were so diffrent from everyone elses.

Do I really need to tell this girl to stop humanizing her rapist? She killed him in self-defense! It was one hundred percent justified! C’mon, Tiaa, don’t be so hard on yourself.

Also, nobody cares about Lauren.

"dave your a good person but ur SO FUCKIN DUMB! YOU ASSHOLE!" i shouted at him and i threw my ashtray at his head WITHOUT TOUCHING IT (i could make stuff move when i was angry now...it was so weird! why did this have too happen to me!)

Well, yeah, that is weird, but I don’t get the woe-is-me attitude about it. Telekinesis is a really cool ability. Also, turns out Dave is literally so dumb that you can be an obvious nonhuman smoking weed in bed while screaming about wanting to die and he’ll take you for an ordinary teenage girl holding a tube of chapstick.

"haha, i guess your right" he laughed (he thougt i was joking, i wasnt spoiled or anythin) 

…so did the ashtray miss?

"its so nice havin you hear tiana, your so pretty. i swear your even prettier than before! 

I can’t help but feel that the amount Dave and Marie compliment Tiaa on her looks borders on inappropriate, considering she is sixteen and they are her foster parents. 

and i think your boobs hav grown!" 

Case in point.

"yeh i no they are like an E cup now" i said.

I guess it’s a good thing she’s a vampire, then, since I’m pretty sure vampires can’t get back problems.

Wait. Can vampires get high? Does being high feel different if you’re a vampire?

Dave smiled and patted me on the head and left.

That Dave!

I was so sick of bein treated like a kid and no one listenin to me that i got up and got dresed in a long black dress and took some pills (of drugs) and went out to the local nightclub which was called Pablo NIghtmare - it was a goth club were all the cool people went in forks. 

Listen, I don’t know Washington State, but in my neck of the woods small towns don’t have goth nightclubs. 

I love that she specified the pills were drugs, in case we thought they were sugar pills or something. 

bella probably had never even heard of it, LOL! 

If there is a goth nightclub in your small town, I guarantee you everyone has heard of it.

i met snoofles on the way and he came with me. 

You’re taking the panda out clubbing?

we went to the club and got drinks and started dancing to the heavy metal music. 

…I’m starting to get very confused about Snoofles. My initial impression was that he’s a regular panda bear, but Tiaa is able to communicate with him because she’s a vampire and can talk to all animals now. But I don’t think ordinary pandas go to clubs, get drinks, and dance to heavy metal music.

Although I’ve never met one, so I could be wrong.

ppl there stared at us cos i was so diffrerent looking and Snoofles was a panda, but we didnt care we were havin so much fun we were SO drunk and had taken a lot of drugs so my head was fuzzy like there was snow everywhere.

I adore the similes in this fic. No idea what Tiaa is on but I definitely know what the author means by feeling like there’s snow everywhere in your head.

"hi your called Tiana arent you? I am Jasper and I go to your school" said Jasper Cullen who was tall with blond curly hair like straw only soft and nice and not dry. 

So… not like straw, then.

he was tall. 

Yeah, you mentioned.

he was wearin a black pulover and red metal pointy shoes. (AN - haha, that descripton sounded beter in my head, OH WELL!)

No, it’s good, I dig it. Simple goth on top, bling on the bottom, may or may not be wearing pants? It’s a look.

"hey whatever" i said. "why arent you with that girl i all ways see you with?

"you mean my GF alice," he said and locked soddenly very sad and started to cry and bite down hard on his lips.

"what is wrong Jasper?" i said

"the problem is i dont love her like she loves me. i am gay, and thats wrong, and i feel so horible about it!" 

Of course he’s gay. Look at his outfit! Look at those shoes! I can’t even see him for real and my gaydar is going wild.

"theres nothing bad about bein gay u no" i said. 

"REALLY?" he sed, and looked chocked with his mouth open.

Good on Tiaa for being an ally. I love how Jasper reacts as though he’s never considered the possibility that his gayness might be alright. He’s a vampire too and has been alive for well over a century, so that’s a lot of internalized homophobia… but he’s also been around to witness the entire modern LGBT rights movement, so you’d think he might have gotten the “it’s okay to be gay” message before.

"yeah, its proper normal and Snoofles is gay and everything" i said and Snoofles waved and Jasper waves back. 

If you just got a bad feeling about what might happen next, trust your fucking instincts.

he smiled and we all stared dancing together and Jasper gave us some of his drugs.

I really wanna know what they’ve been taking, because even though Tiaa isn’t human I feel like anyone who can get high should have to worry about drug interactions. Weed and alcohol is fine, but aside from that I have no idea what the hell Tiaa is on except that she described it as “pills” and a lot of drugs that come in pill form do not play nice with alcohol. She probably isn’t going to fry her liver or anything like that given that she’s essentially undead, but I doubt she’s immune to having a bad trip.

we had a relay good time and jasper met another gay guy called Vince and we all got in Snoofleses car at the end of the night and i drove around while the others all had sex in the back of the car. 

A note: At this point in the story I quite literally had to stop the MST for a bit so I could pour myself a very stiff drink. 

The panda has a car. The panda is having a threesome with a vampire and a human in the back of his car while another vampire drives it. This is treated as normal because the panda and his two human(oid) sexual partners happen to all be gay.

Like, I’d normally feel pretty weird about the “promiscuous gay” stereotype being invoked, but I’m way too busy feeling weird that the author thinks it’s normal for gay guys to want to screw a panda because the panda happens to be gay too. Also, keep in mind Snoofles can only talk to Tiaa — the dudes he’s having sex with can’t understand him. I’m gonna say a panda who behaves like a human and owns a car is probably capable of consenting, but I still feel mighty weird about the idea that two dudes who perceive Snoofles as an ordinary, non-talking panda would want to have a threesome with him.

I guess the promiscuity aspect isn’t even bad considering how Tiaa and Edward have been acting with each other throughout the fic. The bestiality, though, I have trouble overlooking.

(i was drunk but cos i was a vampire it was ok to drive i had beter reflex than humans!)

Sure, but do you even know how to drive? In most states, it’s not legal to get a learner’s permit until you’re Tiaa’s age, so we’re not talking “experienced driver with superhuman reflexes,” we’re talking “superhuman reflexes, but on somebody who quite possibly has never sat in the driver’s seat of a car before.”

but soddenly somethin jumped into the road infront of us and i had to stop the car and get out. there was a man standin in the middle of the road he was tall and mussely and had black hair like the black feathers of a raven in the black darkness. 

But was his black hair like the black feathers of a black raven in the black darkness? I just want to be clear on the color.

he was good looking but he looked so angry i got out my samurai sword (i often have it with me!) but somone jammed up behind me and tore it from me, there were like ten people all grabbing my body in the darkness and they put a thing over my face so i coudnt see and they tied me up! 

Oh, of course, her samurai sword. Yep. Been with her the whole time.

Jasper Snoofles and Vince were too busy doing gay sex on each other to notice, i cud hear them grunting and humping and having orgasms on each other - it was so cute but now was SO not the time! 

She’s being attacked by a group of ten or more people, who have overpowered her, restrained her, and blindfolded her, in the middle of the road. Three people (well, a person, a vampire, and a panda) are present and they don’t notice this happening at all.

Like… I know they’re all intoxicated and, uh, otherwise occupied at the moment, but did they not at least pause to notice Tiaa slamming on the brakes to avoid colliding with a stranger in the road?

The men who had caught me took me away and somethin hit me over the head and i was unconshous.

when i awoken i found myself in a small dark room and the tall mussel man was in front of me. i was strip down to my underwear and i was chained to a chair with some metal chains and i coudnt move.

Tiaa has superhuman strength and reflexes. She has telekinetic abilities. She can affect objects and people by touching them. 

Yet she can’t get out of being chained to a chair?

I call BS.

"WHO ARE YOU YOU WANKY PERV!" i shoyted.

She sounds like Wheatley from “ITS MY LIFE!” now.

"I AM JACOB...THE WEREWOLF KING!" he yelled with his eyes rolling around in his face - he looked so mad and CRAZY!

Jacob’s a big dude who can turn into a wolf, but he’s also about fifteen and just learning about the whole werewolf thing, so I doubt he’d be “king” of anything. Also Tiaa could take him easy.

"NOOOOOOO!" I scremed and i try to broke myself free but i was under so many heavy chains so i looked into his wagging face insted.

I don’t know why she reacted so negatively to Jacob’s response. There is a longstanding vampire/werewolf feud in the Twilight universe, but Tiaa is very newly turned and shouldn’t know about any of that yet. Learning your kidnapper is a werewolf sucks, but if you’re already a vampire you’ve got an edge too.

"Watt do u want from me? why am i here?" i say and i started to cry.

"YOU MUST BE PUNISHED FOR WHAT YOU DID TO BELLA SWAN!" he shreeked and the drool was sloapping down his face just like rain only thick and foam-like. 

So… not like rain, then.

"YOU ARE A HALF-BREAD! 

I’ve got to change this blog’s name right away. I don’t know what I was thinking naming it “The Half-World” when I could have named it “The Half-Bread.”

Also, hold up — what did Tiaa do to Bella? Is this just about “stealing” Edward? Jacob and Edward aren’t exactly buddy-buddy, and if Bella’s single Jacob has a chance with her, so if anything I think he owes Tiaa a thank-you.

YOU SHOUD NEVER HAVE BEEN BORNE! YOUR FATHER WAS A VAMPIRE AND YOUR MOM WAS A WHITCH! ITS WEIRD AND WRONG AND NOW YOUVE BROKEN BELLAS HEART! HALF-BREAD! HALF-BREAD! HALF-BREAD!" 

Well, this really does speak for itself.

This dude was insane, he was so angery he was jumpin up and down. 

Sounds like my second-grade teacher. She was the daughter of a well-known Republican senator and she had to resign after she tied a kid to a chair with a jump rope. True story.

But something he said had caugt my attention .

Good job on the punctuation.

"What do u mean my mom was a whitch?" I said.

What do you think he meant, genius?

"MY FATHER USED TO NO HER! SHE LIVED HERE IN LA PUSH AND SHE WAS A WHITCH! SHE COUD MAKE FIRE COME FROM NOWERE AND CONTROLL THE WETHER AND TALK TO ANIMALS AND LOADS OF OTHER STUFF! SHE WAS A FREAK LIKE U!" 

I guess this does explain Tiaa’s extra powers, but, I have to say, I don’t think Jacob gets to criticize anyone else for being freaky when he can turn into a wolf.

Of corse! It all made sense now! 

It didn’t all make sense. There’s still an interspecies gay threesome that needs explaining.

I was so shocked I fainted,

and also got my periods and commas mixed up,

When i woke up Jacob was in front of me and he was NAKED! He was smilling in a proper creepy way and looked totaly weird like a greasy frog thing and his male genital item was not nice like edwards it was like a horible wet mushroom.

Honest to god I love these similes. 

he stroked my knee with it and i gapsed. whatt was he going to do to me! 

I think I have an idea, actually.

but sudenly before he coud come any closer the door of the room we were in burst open!

IT WAS EWDARD!

Here to save the day! And to end the fic, because this is it for “Forbiden Fruit”: BeckyMac666 left us all on a cliffhanger, so we’ll never know what happens.

I do genuinely love this fanfic. I love how it’s written, I love the similes, I love the purple prose and the melodramatic tone, and I love my girl Tiaa. It’s a truly fantastic badfic, and I’m happy I got to introduce others to it, too.

[57plusthree]

Hiya so sorry if this sounds like I'm asking incredibly too much but can you tell me what you think are the best animated scenes in the entire series? Besides Super Broly of course cause that's just too beautiful. The only moments that immediately come to my mind for every part is the Krillin v Goku, ChiChi v Goku, that part you reblogged with Vegeta shooting a ki blast in the saiyan saga, Cell v Goku, some parts or Kid Buu vs SSJ2 Goku, parts of Baby Vegeta v SSJ4 Goku, SSJB Goku and Trunks v Goku Black and Zamasu, Vegito V Zamasu and Goku with Co v Jiren. Sorry again if this is asking for way too much, feel free to skip this even if it is! I just have been reeling over db as whole this past week and I've been having conflicting thoughts.

You're good! I like receiving super detailed asks tbh <3

Disclaimer: I haven't actually watched the anime all the way through, so I probably do not have as solid a grasp on where all the good animation is lol. That being said, I think I can at least say I've seen most of the well known fights as well as just... random stuff. I've also seen some of the movies (DBS Broly, Dead Zone, World’s Strongest, Tree of Might, Lord Slug, and Super Android 13) as well as the Future Trunks and Bardock specials. In other words, I have a feeling that in answering this, I'm gonna miss things, sorry.

That being said, you've given me the perfect opportunity to talk about a few specific scenes in DB animation that I think about a lot, so thanks! This is gonna be a long answer cause I can’t actually talk about anything without going off for a billion years apparently. Sorry ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

So. First of all, I want to describe what I think of when I think is "good animation". Generally speaking, I judge animation to be “good” kinda like this:

Context. because I’m just Like That and can’t enjoy something if my suspension of disbelief is challenged lol. But this also means what a scene is setting out to do and what it communicates. There’s things you can do with cuts, speed changes, tempo, etc that can really sell and add layers to animation

Creativity. Probably speaks for itself. If an animation does something unique or creative, I like it a lot. I like seeing things I haven’t seen before and being surprised

Basic animation principles. You know... timing, impact, etc. If you’ve seen any posts on animation, you probably have a general idea of what this means. I’m not trained in animation, but I’ve animated a little and have looked at the usual guides and videos

Cinematography: Just like how you can’t separate comic quality from paneling and dialogue, I believe you can judge animation similarly to how you judge live action, because how the animation is framed is also a conscious decision in how its drawn and thusly animated

Brain go bbbrrrrr. Cause sometimes I just like stuff and it’s hard to explain why. We can’t be objective about everything, it’s quite literally impossible

This also means that not all of the best animated scenes in DB are action scenes to me. Character acting and so on are important too. 

Okay now on to me talking about stuff. There are lots of really well animated parts throughout the whole series including all the scenes you mentioned, so I’m going to limit myself to uh... Not as many as I could name. Let’s go!

Piccolo jr. ripping his arm off

You know how I mentioned character acting being really important in a scene? Yeah. Honestly this whole fight is my favorite in the series not just because of its choreo and intuitive combat, but also because of the character-focused sections like this one. It’s raw. It’s gritty. The incredible, pushed-to-the-limits expressions Piccolo makes and how they framed the scene are incredible. Even the usage of color is on point! 11/10 easily.

(This gif’s of them fighting but as said, the combat during this is also fantastic. Also shout out to Goku’s meteor combo. I watch that almost every day.)

Goku vs Ginger, Nikki, and Sancho (Dead Zone)

Hi I think the first two DB movies are some of the best ones actually.

In my opinion, fights where we can see the limb movement > fights where we can’t see the limb movement, so the early DBZ films have a leg up over the later ones. Goku does some really well choreographed and animated dodging when it’s just Ginger and Nikki in particular, with impeccable character acting on top. Shout out to when he gets his hair cut.

This is also where I’ll mention what I like to call injury choreography, which is a part of a fight scene that I think is very important but not talked about a lot. This refers to how taking injuries is framed during a fight, such as how the impact feels and how the injury was choreographed. This is just as important to an animated fight scene as it would be a live action fight scene, and so I count it when I think of what the “best” animation is in the series. There’s really good injury choreo in the first two DBZ movies in particular, and I’d recommend everyone watch them.

The Whole DBS Broly Movie

Because it is.

Whenever UI Goku is on screen

Yeah I haven’t even watched Super but I know gorgeous animation when I see it. I don’t think there’s a single DB fan alive that can make a valid argument against UI being stunning, let alone anyone who thinks it isn’t jaw dropping. I also don’t think there’s much I could say that hasn’t already been said, i just thought it was worth listing because. Yo.

Goku vs. The Goons from World’s Strongest

Okay I saved this one for last because I have the most to say about it. World’s Strongest is a movie I have conflicted feelings over, but one thing I am NOT conflicted on is the scene where Goku confronts the two remaining lackeys of Dr. Wheelo. To see which parts I’m going to talk about, click here and go to about 0:45.

I won’t do a full breakdown, but I am very impressed with this scene. Besides having amazing choreo (the injury choreo in particular for both Goku and the goons is????? incredible I love it), it also answers the a question that I believe to be important to the whole franchise’s animation: how do you convey speed when characters are supposed to be moving too fast for the eye to register?

These scenes answer that question with: Comparison.

Man, Goku looks great in this still doesn’t he? Anyway, what I mean by comparison is that this scene takes Goku’s actions and uses either creative shot comp or interspersing of something happening simultaneously to inform the audience of how fast he’s going. The parts that do this are:

The initial stare down scene. In it, we basically blink and Goku’s smacked this guy in the face with his elbow. It uses shot composition and timing to show that Goku went really damn fast when he hit this guy. The usage of establishing shots in particular made me “oooh”.

Everything from 2:12-2:33. To put a blanket summary over it, everything happening in those seconds happens in the span of how long it takes the guy Goku punched to fly into the wall and collapse into the rubble. The animators interspersed shots of that with the rest of the fight in order to convey how fast Goku was moving using kaioken. That’s bonkers ridiculous fast

I believe that good animation can convey the meaning of a scene clearly, but a great animation can convey not just that but subconscious information that viewers can enjoy on repeat watches. That’s what this scene did for me and it blew my whole mind. 

Go Goku go go--

Alright I’m cutting myself off there. One day I am going to just rip apart this scene by the seems, and maybe do the same with other scenes, because I may not be trained in animation but damn if I don’t have a lot of thoughts rattling around in my skull.

Thanks again for the ask!

[grubhivemind]

-- decastichAmazifier [DA] began pestering devicefulFlightrisk [DF] at 22:42 --

DA: howdious rowdious rugby

DF: Oh hey Kavi.

DF: I forgot I was online... But thats okay.

DA: oh snap... everything ok Peapod?

DF: Yeah.

DF: ... No.

DF: :(

DA: :( wanna talk about it champ?

DF: I guess so... Its just embarrassing.

DF: Embarrassing and kind of frightening but mostly I feel stupid.

DF: I just found out Ive been hanging out with the guy who murdered Rammie.......

DF: And I really liked him.

DA: oh

DA: well damn

DA: ....sorry man

DA: that's.... wow ok so yeah that's pretty scary and upsetting

DA: ....

DA: you want some froyo buddy? :(

DF: Um...

DF: Yeah, actually... I think Id like that.

DA: sweet i'll bring some you-ward

DA: where you at?

DF: Im at my apartment.

DF: Let me... Tidy up a little bit...

DA: ok but mind you i'm not gonna mind

DA: i'll say things in a posh accent

DA: judging vocally with jokes

DA: but not really give a shit

DA: but do you sweetpea

DF: Ill at least clear a path to the door... Hehe.

DA: bitchin, catch you in 20

KAVI: *It doesn't take him long to gather said froyo and head on over to Jace's Place. They're gonna eat it straight out the tub like heathens. This is his plan. He has waffle cone chips and some other fixins in space ziplocs. Knockity knock knock*

JACE: *Jace's Place™ is a studio apartment in one of the older parts of town. a little run down, but the isolation was some of the appeal, on top of the aesthetic. he peeps out the peep hole before opening the door for his brother, putting on a smile, but his big old glasses only magnify his red puffy eyes.*

JACE: Hi Kavi... Come on in. *stands aside, pushing some more junk out of the way with his foot. which, yes, it's a bit of a disaster in here. he's been living here for a few months but there's still unopened boxes everywhere. a good portion of the floor is cluttered with gadgets and gizmos aplenty, but he's got a living area with a tv! and a bed! so that's something.*

KAVI: *aww... baby. Kavi makes his way in. He might tidy up after making Jace take a nap* sup broski *cheek smooch*

KAVI: brought some froyo for your soul yo

JACE: Thanks... Go ahead and make yourself at home. Sorry about the mess... Again... *closes the door and then goes to shuffle towards his couch. time to drape over it, dramatic and sad.*

KAVI: it's ok you should see my vanity *It's a goddamn disaster.... and his closet. And his life*

KAVI: *goes to sit on the couch and pops out all the froyo and fixins* i got spoons

KAVI: and toppings for what we load on the spoons

KAVI: we're gonna eat this whole tub

JACE: *holds his hand out for a spoon. he's ready.* Okay, good.

JACE: I hope you have gummy worms.

KAVI: *gives him the spoon and pops the top* dude, of course i do

KAVI: bears too

KAVI: and soul patch kids

KAVI: just in case you like to suffer

JACE: Apparently I do... :( *casually steals ALL of these toppings to put on his froyo.*

JACE: I um... Well... Ive gotten up to some other things, aside from hanging out with friend killers.

JACE: But you cant tell anybody about it, okay? *looks at him with big eyes while also stuffing his face.*

KAVI: my ears are always open for the gossip but my lips are sealed for your secrets

KAVI: *dumps a bunch of sprinkles on his spoon then scoops froyo*

JACE: I was on Odimist sometime... last week? You know, Ive been trying to study all the weirdness going on there.

JACE: I was creeping around Colts house... And Finn heard me. He thought I was like a home invader or something... But anyway, to make a long story short, I ended up hanging out with him and we were watching movies and stuff.

JACE: I got the bright idea to tell him I liked him... Which I guess was obvious to everyone BUT him. *sighs* He said he didnt feel the same way, but since I was being all mopey he tried telling me I was still... I dont know! Desirable? Ahhh.

JACE: So then I got the even BRIGHTER idea to-- Oh gosh. I dont even know how to say this... *covers his face and sighs*

JACE: I?? Made a move on him???

KAVI: .... *listens to this.... puts his fist up to his mouth*

KAVI: *considers*

KAVI: was there a weenie slip in there

JACE: *sweats...*

JACE: Ummm... You could say that.

KAVI: i could say it in other ways, should i do that?

KAVI: but also i mean...........

KAVI: that's..... you're business?

KAVI: i mean

KAVI: whoever you wanna bang that's up to you, you're an adult man

KAVI: i fully support you shopping to fill your sexual appetites

KAVI: i feel like it goes without saying i would kneecap anyone if it was funny business

KAVI: but if you're cool i'm cool and that's your choice.... but i'm sorry you didn't have your feelings returned

KAVI: *rubs his shoulder*

JACE: Thanks... *accepts the shoulder rubs, but he's a LITTLE FLUSTERED about everything else he said. kavi, please.* I dont regret doing what I did exactly??? But...

JACE: Maybe it wasnt the best decision for my heart in retrospect. And then Kougah... Bluh. *slumps and shovels more ice cream, eyes getting watery again.*

JACE: I must have pretty poor judgement or something.

KAVI: well...

KAVI: i can say

KAVI: that sometimes... an asshole isn't that bad but they're still an asshole

KAVI: so it's not bad judgement on your part really...

KAVI: because you saw all the potential non-dickery???

KAVI: but it's still kind of pretty big dicking in the bad way

KAVI: your judgement is fine but people are complex

KAVI: so it's hard to tell shit off the bat

JACE: *looks at him, pathetic and sad, but he's trying to believe what he's being told* :(

JACE: I guess so...

JACE: I just wish... I could meet someone that wasnt so completely wrong for me. Even just a little bit wrong for me would be preferable.

KAVI: yeah... you will

KAVI: you just have to draw the line of what you will and won't put up with

JACE: I guess murder is a pretty clear place to draw a line, huh??? *sighs deeply*

KAVI: i mean.... i personally don't endorse it and that's also pretty goddamn danger

JACE: Im just bitter about it... *looks at kavi again.* But thank you for listening.

JACE: I didnt really know who to talk to about this...

KAVI: you can talk to me, just so you know man

KAVI: i cast no judgement and i'm only moderately nosy

KAVI: i would ask how good a lay Finn is but i tend to stay away from meatsticks

KAVI: also you're still a little upset

KAVI: so it's a dish for another day

KAVI: *pat pat*

JACE: *wheezes gently about it, but then he laughs.* Yeah... Lets put that topic aside for now.

JACE: *squirms closer to lean on him. he's feeling cuddly after sharing all those emotions... exhausting.* Do you want to watch a movie or something? ... While we eat all this frozen yogurt? *ALL OF IT*

KAVI: most def Peapod *nudges him and readies his SPOON*

KAVI: *And so they totally didn't get bellyaches*