#also imo fresh is a bit of a control freak | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

phoenixryzing · 8 years

Text

Another’s Pain

Freshuary Day 5: Emotion (Note: this is VERY long. Sorry in advance.)

“You never think, do you?! DO you ever, EVER, think about what it’s like for us? The torment you put us through? How’d you like it if it was you, huh? Tell me! How would you like it?”

“Brah, it don’t bother me none, you know that,” Fresh replied, before going back to ignoring the voice. The host.

He had heard it all. Death threats, curses, screams- so many screams. It didn’t bother him. Nothing did. Nothing could. He... actually liked the sound if it. It meant he was in control. Powerful. If they were quiet... he would wonder what was up. What they were planning.

Not like they could hurt him, but. It was a pain in the neck to deal with a takeover attempt. It tired them both out. Wasteful- useless. They never won. They never would.

Fresh heelied along, going nowhere in particular, just cruisin’. He didn’t have anything he needed to do, and... he didn’t feel like doing anything. The host had shut up, slightly worrying him. But their words... wouldn’t leave his head.

How would you like it?

Fresh hadn’t really ever thought about it. Why would he? What they felt did not matter. He knew, from a factual point of view, that the hosts were in incredible pain. That they often longed to die, to be freed from suffering. Fresh couldn’t understand it. No matter how painful their life was... how was it better than dying? Than non-existing?

Their emotions... it confused him. Angered him, as much as anything could. It. was. so. STUPID. Why would anyone throw their life away? Why would they CARE?

Caring was not an advantage, in his mind. He didn’t care- and he never wanted to. If it made him as suicidal and moronic as them.

But...

The host’s words wouldn’t go away.

He tried to push them aside. It didn’t matter. He didn’t care. He didn’t care.

He didn’t-

Fresh stopped rolling for a moment, and absently rubbed his chest, over where the soul sat. It... hurt. What... that wasn’t...

His closed his eyes and checked the soul. No, it still looked whole. It had a few cracks, but not many. Not enough to explain this. He... never felt pain... not soul pain. Not... whatever this was.

What was going on?

Fresh opened his eyes, confused and feeling himself getting angrier. This wasn’t supposed to happen.

Fresh quit rolling and started striding. He needed to stop this. This wasn’t normal, this wasn’t right- he wouldn’t put up with it.

If the soul was corrupted, broken, whatever- it didn’t mater. It would go. Flaws were not acceptable. Pain was not acceptable. This was not acceptable.

He was always in control. Of everything. But this... he couldn’t control it. So he would e n d i t.

Fresh walked along, in predator mode now. He scanned for someone suitable for his needs, someone easy to take. He didn’t have time for this- he did not want to deal with this. But.

His soul ached more and more as he walked. What started as a dull pang was slowly growing to an all-consuming burning. Like all he was was burning away, being consumed. Soon Fresh started to wheeze, the pain too much to contain.

The pain angered him, but his cheap shadow of anger couldn’t match the burning. He could feel what little self-preserving emotion he had being overwhelmed by the pain.

Fresh tried to shake his head, shake it away. Or at least to concentrate. He was starting to have issues thinking straight. This just angered him even more, but the pain... it was exhausting him. He wanted to just lie down and sleep, sleep for a thousand years... or just rip his soul out of his chest. Anything to end the pain. But he couldn’t.

Fresh pushed himself on, doggedly determined to find a new host ASAP. He could hear the host chuckling slightly, but Fresh ignored it. He had bigger concerns right now than whatever that shell was thinking.

Fresh eventually entered a city, staggering and slightly dazed. His eyes didn’t want to focus on anything, his mind didn’t want to clear the fog away. The pain was still there, but now the burning was dulled by pure exhaustion. He had no energy, to move, to think. He knew in the back of his mind that this tiredness was not physical, that his body had plenty of energy. It was something else entirely, something Fresh had never experience before.

He wanted to figure it out, figure out away to stop it, but he couldn’t. He could barely stand. He had to focus on simply walking, one step following another. If anyone came after him now, he wasn’t sure he could defend himself, a thought which sent a pang of fear through him. He needed to stop this. Now.

Fresh staggered along, determined to pick the first poor sap he could possess easily. He scanned people, analyzing them as best he could given the circumstances. He wandered around for fifteen or so minutes before he saw someone.

Not a skeleton, not a candidate. A younger girl, maybe a teenager. She was walking along, trying to ignore a guy following her. He kept on walking up to her, despite her speeding up to get away, talking to her. He finally got angry and grabbed her by the arm, spinning her around to face him.

Fresh paused, for a minute, watching the interaction. Bullying was totes unrad, and he had half a mind to walk on over and stop it, out of principle. But right now he didn’t have the time or energy, and what did he care?

He kept watching though. Slowly something started to change. He started to feel a bit like he couldn’t breathe, like his non-existent throat was closing up. He felt... like he was surrounded in liquid, trapping him in its suffocating grasp.

Fresh coughed once, twice, to try and clear up the weird sensation. But it didn’t work. His breathing didn’t get worse, but. The feeling of drowning... of the light going away... didn’t end. It started to overwhelm him, causing him to start breathing raggedly,.

He had been facing the woman, who was still being harassed, but now he turned away, head in hands. He was trying to think. But slowly, he noticed something. When... he didn’t face her... the feeling of drowning lessened. What... no... what was this?

Fresh decided to experiment slightly. He turned back towards the scene, to see if the feeling came back. But soon he was shocked into stillness.

The man had the women almost pinned against the wall. She was... crying? and even from across the street Fresh could hear her begging him to go away. The guy just leaned in closer, whispering something indistinguishable to her.

The street was empty except for them. Fresh started to turn away, to leave- harassment was wrong but he was busy- when the woman cried out. Fresh snapped around again, and without thinking strode over to them.

The guy was... Fresh didn’t bother to check the details. He grabbed the guy by the shoulder and whipped him around. The guy’s face registered surprise, fear, for half a second. Fresh socked him in the face, hard enough for him to crumple to the ground.

He was breathing hard, a nervous energy running through him. His mind was racing- what was happening, why did he do that, that was stupid WHY DID HE DO THAT-

Fresh was always in control. But that... he didn’t think. He had just acted.

The woman was trying to say something to him, but Fresh pushed her aside. Started to walk off. She walked after him- Fresh heard her footsteps- so he. Ran.

He ran through the city, till he was sure he had lost her. He was still breathing heavily- now from exertion- and shaking. From fear.

He... didn’t know what was happening to him. He didn’t know why he was acting like this, how to stop it. How to control it. He always... he needed to fix it. But he was starting to fear... that he couldn’t.

He still felt like he was burning, his head all foggy. It still felt like the light was gone, like he couldn’t breathe. He... nothing was stopping it. What...why...?

“Not so nice to be on the receiving end, huh?” a voice said.

Fresh whipped around, but soon realized the voice came form inside. From the soul.

“WHAT DID YOU DO?” Fresh demanded, fear igniting rage in him.

“Me? Nothing “brah”. It all you. Being burned away- isn’t fun, is it? Feeling yourself slip away, consumed. That nothing matters because nothing helps. That the sun won’t ever shine, because all you’ll ever know from now on is despair.

“Not so nice when it’s YOU, huh?”

Fresh... didn’t respond. He just stood, breathing heavily, trying to process it all. He couldn't. His mind wouldn’t work. And that thought scared him more than any other.

He always was in control of himself. But now... he couldn’t do anything.

Fresh eventually found another host. But it was even worse.

He could hear the host screaming in pain, and felt like a dagger had been stabbed through him. The host pleaded, begged, for some- any- help, and Fresh felt like he was going to suffocate, collapse and curl up into a ball and never leave. The host cried- so much- and Fresh could feel the darkness returning, turning the bright sunny day into a starless night.

He didn’t have words for these sensations, he could only guess. Desperation, despair, pain...

Everything the host felt, he felt.

And it wasn’t just them.

Fresh couldn’t walk outside anymore without being assaulted by new, horrible, experiences.

When he saw a little girl crying, his throat choked up and he felt like collapsing, and never getting up again.

When he saw someone shouting at another, he could feel himself burning, a smoky haze filling his brain, poisoning his thoughts.

When he saw someone back away in fear, or cower from another’s words, or quickly apologize to appease another, he could feel his throat close up, his body tense up, from the fear,

The fear was the worst. He saw it e v e r y w h e r e, and he knew it the most. It hadn’t been his nature to feel anger or sadness or happiness, but fear. He knew that emotion like it was a brother.

Fresh started avoiding people, avoiding going out. If he did, he just went to parties, places everyone was happy. Happiness he could deal with- it meshed with his rad 90′s self.

But the rest...

Fresh tried to ignore. Tried to walk without seeing, hear without listening. He avoided any contact he didn’t have to initiate. He tried to avoid feeling anything.

Because now he was cursed to feel everything.

...And he had no idea what he was going to do.

Fresh was made by @loverofpiggies

Freshuary was made by @feth

#freshuary #fresh #day five: an emotion for fresh #VERY LONG POST #empathy is an emotion too #to feel another's pain #how would fresh ever deal with that?#how COULD he?#he can;t even deal with his own faint emotions'#much less the worlds #sorry this idea was too angsty to not attempt #even if I didnt do too good #1800 words btw #also imo fresh is a bit of a control freak #internally at least #story post

12 notes · View notes

cheekbites-moved · 4 years

Text

ok i still havent gotten the secret ending but farming for it might take me a bit so im gonna make a thoughts post for age of calamity now:

Major spoilers obvs so ill put it under a read more

things i enjoyed:

revali beatdown simulator

the controls for the divine beasts are a bit clunky, but i think the angles they used for them did an excellent job at really making the player feel like we were actually controlling a divine beast. so i think it was done well.

link’s personality really gets to shine full force in this game with the amount of cut scenes and it was wonderful to see

every character clearly had a lot of love put into how they operate. they truly all feel unique, & all of their play styles fit them really well in my opinion

the game does a really good job of making you understand what a real threat the monsters are. like in botw they’re intimidating at first, but once you’re far enough into the game they become just an inconvenience to work around if anything. this game managed to actually make certain monsters intimidating for me again, and i think that’s a real accomplishment

the blight battles are actually somewhat challenging in this game and that is truly a commendable achievement lol i think all the bosses are good tbh. i didnt rly dislike or not enjoy any of them.

the way daruk and link’s friendship & urbosa’s motherly relationship towards zelda got to shine was. so good. it’s all i could’ve ever wanted

seeing the descendants again was really nice & it was awesome to see the champions interacting with them!! especially sidon and mipha omggggg. that was. really fucking good shit

kohga. just. kohga in general. getting to see more of him was really rad, he’s such a fun guy! and his english va was Excellent. you could really tell he was having a lot of fun playing him, and it was lovely to see! :)

zelda getting to really shine in this game was also lovely to see. and her being so assertive and badass by the end? omg. it was so wonderful especially after botw. man.

the combat is done very well imo. im rly glad that they took so many elements from botw, but also added their own flares to make it feel fresh. it was rad.

sidon’s tagline is “winning smile” and his power is “boundless optimism” and i think that’s beautiful

the music in this game is SOOOOO good oh my god. multiple times during playing i had to pause to just appreciate it. it’s pretty much all remixes of botw with a few originals for the new characters, but they all slap. there was not a single song in this game i didn’t like. it is definitely one of my favorite video game soundtracks officially. maybe one of my favorite overall soundtracks in general tbh.

the visuals obviously look just like botw, but it still looked fucking gorgeous at some points. like. man. they really went off to make it look not only faithful to botw as far as appearance goes, but also as far as capturing botw’s beauty and it was. excellent to see!

if anything is true to botw’s backstory, it’s definitely how op link is. cause he was established to be op in botw, & when u finish botw he is also op as hell. he is so fun to play as the higher leveled he gets. he absolutely kicks ass. especially with a two-handed weapon??? daaaaammmmnnn. thats my badass baby boy!!!!

link eating rocks not once, but TWICE. just showing PEAK gremlin energy. 10/10 for those scenes they were great

the ending was really beautiful actually and i did cry like a little baby for it what about it

things i didn’t like:

obviously first and foremost.. this is not the game we were advertised. and no matter how much i overall enjoyed the game, it will always have some layer of being tainted attached to it due to the false advertising. this is not the prequel we thought we’d be getting. & not using “prequel” specifically doesn’t matter when all the advertising, including the box art talks about this being the story of what happened 100 years ago. with no indication it wasn’t the story of what happened 100 years ago in the botw timeline, but a separate universe/timeline entirely. i do hope we get dlc for the game at some point giving us what we were advertised, but at the same time... rly wish that the story that’s in the final game was dlc, & the story we were promised was the original :/ or just having the game have two separate storylines originally would’ve been cool. i just wish it wasn’t falsely advertised.

fort hateno can fucking eat my whole entire shit WHY is that part so needlessly obnoxious compared to everything else oh my god

being forced to fulfill revali’s power fantasy TWICE hurt my soul

fuck any mission where you have to protect the useless hylian guards. i hate them. they suck.

the ai for player characters when you aren’t playing as them can also be pretty useless. it was really frustrating failing missions because my fellow party members weren’t helping me, and i was basically expected to be in two places at once to get shit done myself. :/ ik you can just switch between characters to make it easier, but like. i like playing as link the most. he’s my favorite character, & ofc since he’s mandatorily played for most of the story, he’s gonna be the most leveled up character regardless so he’s just the best to play as in general especially for harder missions. it was annoying to be forced to play as other people Solely cause the ai was so useless.

king rhoam’s attempt at a redemption arc. i’m not sorry that i just fucking hate this man. i don’t mind him entirely in botw bc you can see clear, genuine remorse during the cut scene at the end of the great plateau. but the redemption arc he gets in this game? after all the fucking shit he does in this game? especially when after his ~redemption arc~ i had to sit through a cut scene of him being an absolute fucking asshole to baby zelda after her mother just died????? absolutely fuck that shit. i don’t appreciate that crap at fucking all. he’s a verbally abusive piece of shit and i hate his guts.

obviously there was gonna be some retconning of how certain things worked in botw in order to make this kinda game work but the way sheikah technology works in this game is so goddamn confusing i do not get it. the works of botw are never outright said or explained completely, but it’s straightforward enough that it doesn’t really matter. this game does try to explain certain things and it just becomes. really clunky and confusing very quickly.

the story is alright, i guess, but..... really confusing/convoluted as hell at times to a point that it’s. really fucking distracting. especially in comparison to how straightforward botw’s story is. like..... cannot help but be annoyed that such a problem wouldn’t have been a thing if they stuck to botw’s story.

i was sad when the egg thing died but i dont like the egg thing.... it is the MAIN reason shit was retconned so much & i just. dont get its purpose. but i did really like the reveal that zelda made it herself. that was good shit!

also the egg glitched out like. a LOT. idk what the fuck was going on with the poor thing but there was multiple times during a cut scene or when i was just sitting there that it was freaking out in the background and it was rly weird

elemental overworld boss monsters................. obnoxious. especially elemental guardians like goddamn bro what the fuck

i know warriors’ games aren’t about exploring anyway but the limitations for exploring was really sad/frustrating. this is still somewhat the world of hyrule before the calamity, which is something we’ve always wanted to see. not being able to explore even the immediate area at certain points because of shit like timed missions was really upsetting, man. :( i just wanted to see hyrule castle Before the calamity why was did they have to rob us like that.....

creepy corrupted egg’s transformation. why. what was that. what the fuck

even though i did enjoy the boss fights, it did get. incredibly taxing eventually to have to fight the SAME bastards so many times. like yeah botw is also guilty of this with the blights, but goddamn.... at least i have a choice to avoid certain encounters with them? this game has you fighting the same bitches like upwards of 3-4 times. it was. really annoying tbh. like the fights themselves are enjoyable, but damn we added new characters and it still inevitably lacked variety in boss fights.

no playable kass >:( if he’s available later in dlc then fine but i wish he was playable in the original game. so many random choices you’d never expect are. why couldn’t he also be there >:(

overall:

it will forever have that sour taste for the false advertising attached to it unfortunately, but that aside, i overall did enjoy the game! i think it has a lot to love in spite of the issues i encountered. as someone who has this as their first warriors game as well, it did lend itself to letting me see the appeal of them. idk if i’ll get more, but i do get why they’re so beloved/popular now. it was an alright time, with some amazing highlights that i’m gonna think back on very fondly for a very, very long time. if i had to rate it..... 7/10

#hw #aoc #hw aoc #hyrule warriors #age of calamity #legend of zelda #botw #danni plays hw aoc #mine #long post #v long post sorry lol i have so many thoughts/feelings

11 notes · View notes

degenezijde · 5 years

Text

We saw Dark Phoenix yesterday! We saw parts of it twice because the electricity failed, and then the sound wouldn’t come on, so they had to rewind it again.

Some midly spoilery bullet points. Mostly won’t make sense without context, haha.

It’s actually not that bad, IMO? Like, not worse than the previous Phoenix movie. I know that is a low bar, but still

That being said, and speaking as an X-men fan... I’m way beyond wanting to see the phoenix saga on screen. And the Magneto vs Xavier piss contest. And Days of Future Past. Any “event” can go - don’t want it. Find me something new. Go smaller.

WHAT was the USE of setting this in the NINETIES if you’re not going to do anything with it??? Did they forget about their gimmick? Are the nineties so back already that I didn’t notice that the outifts were nineties? I don’t think so. The most 90′s thing was freaking Dazzler, but she’s Dazzler.

I’m done with pretending Xavier and Magneto are 60-70 years old by now. Seriously. What the fuck. Is Xavier mind controlling everyone into thinking he’s still young?

I did get a nice explanation for why Mags is looking so baby fresh. There’s this GIANT ALOE on a shelf in the background when he’s doing his talk with Jean.

Speaking of talk - what was with the dialogue in this movie? It was so clunky!

Magneto’s got a hippie hideout. Not-Genosha.

I LOVED getting to hate Xavier in this one. Oh man, every horrible manipulative decision he’s ever made comes to bit him in the ass. I love it! I just kept going “fuck you charles” under my breath, and I felt 15 reading the X-men comics again.

So, Jean time. I like this Jean! I do!

NO ONE ELSE DOES OR WHAT??? Seriously, everyone is WAY TOO CHILL about her nearly dying in space?? “We don’t know what happened there but OH WELL JEAN CAN HANDLE IT” OH CAN SHE????

The car crash was filmed in a HORRIFIC was. It was extremely visceral. Well done, yes, but... too real? It was horrible to look at.

“Hey, who’s gonna tell the 6-10 year old patient about what happened to her parents? I don’t wanna. Let’s get that long haired guy in the wheelchair to do it.” (Pasi: yeah but she’s a creepy mutant kid. Me: THAT DOESN’T EXCUSE YOU BEING A BAD NURSE)

What is up with Beast in this franchise. His little roar and funny jumpy walk when he goes beast mode. Just. Eh? Not fan.

Ah, Mystique. I love her in spy-manipulative-mode, but she’s just... Horribly underused in that respect. Guess it doesn’t fit being a hero. Anyway, Lawrence is so tired of blue make-up. Takes drastic measures. Had to comfort Pasi. Do I have to be vague? Is it a spoiler if they tell it in interviews?

The music and fight choreography are VERY GOOD. Especially the last fight on the train - *chef’s kiss*. Everyone’s powers are used, in creative ways, and Magneto gets to finger-flick metal into everyone and gets to play at being a car crusher.

EXCEPT for some reason, in that scene where... the X-men have trouble crossing a road. It’s very chaotic and weird. Also has some moments but... It’s hard to work out who’s where and why the X-men can’t get to the other side of the road

You know the now-obligatory Quicksilver scene? Gets mixed up in a good way. Boy eats pavement. Pleasing.

Ah, the chess. Good chess scene.

***NIGHTCRAWLER BONUS ROUND***

My baby is on-screen a lot!

Mostly he’s playing taxi for people but hey

(would have been more amusing if people still got fucking nauseous after tho.)

Doesn’t get to say much, though. But still!

At least he’s not Ororo! Ororo doesn’t get to say shit!

But they are both part of the main fight team and get to shine in that respect.

Seriously, give me more of them together I need

Also there’s one scene where people are cheering the team on and there’s one person holding up a NIGHTCRAWLER sign and there’s one kid in blue facepaint

and one kid holding a Mystique barbie doll? That’s how Xavier gets his funds? Merch?

A Nightcrawler fan saves the day!

I’ve seen fans be angry about the final fight because ooh boy, yeah, Kurt gets nasty but

we’re dealing with... basically zombies

it’s very pleasing to see him bamf and shiv

that demonic smile when he bamfed that one baddie in front of a train? Excellent.

ON THE OTHER HAND he cracks one minion’s neck with his tail and... Kurt no that’s what happened to your brother you’re gonna get traumatic flashbacks about this

so all in all I’m happy and I hope that he can be popular enough to make him more of a staple X-man (replace the whole Cyclops-Jean-Wolverine thing with more Nighty)

#x men #x men dark phoenix #nightcrawler

7 notes · View notes

videobun-gameblog · 6 years

Text

Rambling about Sekiro (spoilers below read me):

- Evolution of "i'm scared to block, i like Souls rolling" to "okay i'll block and sort of deflect but only basic attacks i know" to "okay I don't even need to dash except for perilous attacks!" to "okay now i can actually flip between defense and offense on the fly and this is SUPER fun!!"

- Basically, I've never in my life played a game where offense and defense mesh so well together, where blocking is FUN and viable, and seeing your attacks get deflected is actually GOOD and not just infuriating, because you're making progress in the fight.

- People've said Dark Souls is a little like a hard, combat focused Zelda but really, THIS is what that's like, and I'm in love. From did it.

- The upgrade system is neat and I appreciate it for rewarding exploration but also allowing you to challenge yourself by refusing to use them. Also it just works out really well for speedrun balancing and I can’t wait to see the evolution of speedruns in this game because there’s a good balance between wanting more power, posture, and HP and wanting to go as fast as possible.

SPOILERS UNDER CUT, DON’T DO IT UNLESS YOU ARE ALREADY AT /END/ GAME OR DO NOT EVER INTEND TO BUY SEKIRO

---!!!SPOILER ZONE (I'm serious do not read if you intend to play or are still playing)!!!---

(long space for people who might see this on the blog first as opposed to via the dashboard)

- I absolutely adore the weird scientific/medicinal/supernatural macabre shit in this game. The red lump item gave me chills picking it up the first time. Same thing with seeing the first undying monk thing, I couldn't even burn it (but then I finally did it with THAT ITEM... more below)

- haha hand in a jar! haha that guy that flies at you... haha, monkey :) haha ninja dog...... hell even the headless... I love From's mix of disturbing humor (or just flat out being funny despite the bleak setting). Their version of mimics in Souls sum this up best but there's plenty of things here too that are just flat out hilarious and I love it.

- Oh Christ, speaking of, I did the Doctor questline and oh god it gave me some of that Bloodborne dread.

- "IS THAT A FUCKING DARK SOULS?" also lmao when he falls

- "IS THAT THE FUCKING CHAOS BLADE!??" oooh fuck oh fuck *pushes up glasses* remember the cut content with Shiva in Dark Souls???

- Sekiro/Wolf having the "defy your father, break the code" moment was SO good and I love that whole archetype. Simple but I just... <3 Oh god and When Owl is basically just like "that's my boy" when you kill him... I... u_u

- giving Lord Kuro rice was SO cute and just furthered my love for Wolf because this child is teaching him part of how to be himself and to also enjoy things (basically chill the fuck out you freaking murder machine, you are more than that) through compassion, friendship, and a reminder of his own childhood and I don't really get emotional over stuff like this often but awww..! ;_;

- The sake dialogue moments are so good. A very simple concept but I love the nature of sharing part of one's past through a friendly offering, it felt like a really good balance between clear concise mechanics (sake) fitting neatly with narrative elements. It's basically just a dialogue item but it didn't FEEL that way. I felt genuine excitement upon finding new drinks knowing I'd get a chance to share it.

- OH MY GOD ENFEEBLED IS SUCH A GOOD ASS STATUS EFFECT??? THE ANIMATIONS!!! He just hobbles around like a dude who just suddenly became an old man (’cuz that’s literally what it is) with his sword as a cane??? I LOVE FROMSOFT! That shit is so wonderfully expressive but also fits perfectly with that style of horror humor (and I lied before. Mimics are beaten by THIS status effect. New number one spot for my fave moment like this in a From game)

- Oh also speaking of animation, those fucking boss kills!!! *deep inhale* BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- While not my favorite boss mechanically, SPECIFICALLY that kill animation on the Giant Ape... DUDE HOLY FUUUCK! and then the fake out!?!?!? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! SO good!

- Lady Butterfly was a fun main boss and O'Rin of the Water was a fun mini boss. Plenty of others were fantastic but those stood out. Like, two of my friends so far have expressed the same feelings on Butterfly! Good Fight!

- I even liked the gimmick fights! They did it! Gimmick fights that are actually well designed! They're more about exploring mechanics outside of pure combat without punishing you super fucking hard at a random point just because they can. (Bed of Chaos, Micolash) Strangely a little bit of a breather, which is fitting because it’s a perfect counter balance to the stress of finding yourself in a unique situation. They actually give you time to analyze, think, and breathe it all in!

- I'm currently stuck on an end game "secret"/optional boss with some classic From Lore Implications *ok hand* and it's brutal af. I am excited to learn how to master this.

--- SLIGHT CRITICISM (basically the “i love it so much i can’t help but see small flaws but I’d still give it a 10/10 anyway” part) ---

- I like that even when they repeat mid bosses they usually put them in a new arena to change things up. I think a FEW were a little overdone though and could have benefited from maybe... I dunno, a couple new ones in their place or at LEAST alternate movesets to change things up a bit more than just location BUT the combat is engaging enough that I don't mind, I just found it a LITTLE weird how despite the rest of the polish there was a tad bit of copy-paste (but far FAR less egregious than DS1)

- Idk how replayable this game is gonna be but I can definitely see myself finishing NG+ and doing two more playthroughs for all endings. It's replayable more in the Metroid or Legend of Zelda sense and less in the Dark Souls character build sense. "I wanna try a new route first and beat bosses more effectively this time. I wanna be as stealthy as possible this run" etc. and not "I wanna make an int build" (less a critique and more an observation on how it differs from Souls replayability)

- Dragonrot is like, the only actual flaw in this game imo. It doesn't have enough depth. I was thinking it would have more end game narrative significance but it's just something tied to the sort of useless unseen aid mechanic which fails to really incentivize risky play. If anything it just encourages you to grind before bosses to cap the current exp bar and save/store/spend sen by spending 10 minutes fucking around elsewhere until you're ready so that you have nothing to lose. I feel like it should have done some world state changes and something more intense, like ACTUALLY having npcs die and having a healthier world state and an unhealthier world state where some enemies get weaker or stronger based on which extreme your world is on etc. etc. basically ANYTHING more than it is now. But this is super minor relative to how good everything else is. It just felt underwhelming considering all it was hyped up to be. It’s one of those things I just ignore as if it wasn’t there and it’s just as good because it has little effect on the parts that I DO like the game for.

---FINAL NOTE---

- To end on a positive note though, Sekiro managed to be a game that iterated on the Souls formula by defying part of what it became (dodge heavy, block averse play, slow, parrying primarily for one-shotting) yet still providing the same feelings of starting one of those games fresh. Part of what makes it FEEL Souls-y is precisely what separates it from those games, and it's all too good to really put into words at the moment. Like sure it's got Estus, bonfires, and a kick-your-ass "you're going to get stuck and frustrated and that's how it is" attitude and it's got a similar enough control scheme, but beyond that, there's just so much more combat and movement depth that it's a whole new beast, and I love it so much.

#Sekiro #spoilers

13 notes · View notes

bigklingy · 7 years

Text

Pokemon Generation Thoughts

Since a blog I follow did this, I thought I’d do mine. Gen 1:

Pros: -The one that started it all. -How crazily into it kids at school were. -Gym Leaders were pretty memorable. -For the time, a good twist for the final battle. -Glitches are fun to mess with. -The crit formula based on base speed was actually kind of interesting. Cons: -Incredibly glitchy, to the point where speedrunners keep finding more and more insane ways to break the game. Spawning item balls that are also trainers that are actually wild Pokemon?! Making a sign give you an Eevee?! Beating the game in 0:00?!?! I know these are glitches you’re unlikely to find without intentionally trying, but there are MANY game-breaking ones you’re very likely to encounter by accident. -Very unbalanced battle system. Psychic types are broken, some moves were coded badly and worse than useless (Focus Energy QUARTERED your crit rate), X Accuracy + OHKOs destroys the game, Wrap/Fire Spin etc were extremely annoying. -Most of the Pokemon haven’t aged well stat-wise. Gen 2: Pros: -I liked the Johto region. -Greatly fixed a lot of Gen 1′s gameplay, far less glitches. -Split Special into Special Attack and Special Defense. -Introduced breeding. -Had another entire region for the postgame, with 8 more badges. -Normal trainers have names now! Phone numbers gave them a bit of personality. -You can actually delete HMs now! -You can catch both mascot legendaries regardless of your game. Cons: -Most of the new Pokemon are extremely mediocre or outright terrible, with very few good ones (stat-wise). -IMO, second worst starters in the series. Typhlosion’s stats are directly copied from Charizard, why?? -The “split path” after the 4th badge, where you could get the 5th, 6th and 7th badges in any order, was a good idea in theory but not well implemented. Whichever path you take last ends up horribly underleveled. -Low levels overall, leading to a fairly easy main story. -Kanto is horribly balanced, almost everything is a joke for the point you have access to it. -Until Crystal, phone calls were generic and boring. In all versions though, phone calls get very annoying. -Cross-gen trading is clunky and awkward, you had to manually delete any move that didn’t exist in Gen 1. -Introduced roaming legendaries. Gen 3: Pros: -Nice graphical upgrade. -Abilities, Natures and the revamped EV system add more strategy to battling. -Introduced a new way to play in Double Battles. -The Hoenn region is pretty nice if you ignore the water areas. Some cool new area concepts we haven’t seen before, like deserts and volcanoes. -Significant plot differences between versions now. -Emerald’s Battle Frontier is very fun. Cons: -Loss of compatibility with older versions, meaning that a huge number of old Pokemon weren’t available until Kanto remakes. -Hoenn in general went really crazy with required HM usage. WHY DID THEY MAKE ROCK SMASH AN HM! -Vanilla Ruby/Sapphire have the worst postgame in the entire series by far. (Just a Battle Tower and one roaming legend) Fixed in Emerald and slightly fixed in the remakes. -Team Magma and Aqua were lame and unmemorable. Fixed in the remakes. -Introduction of version-exclusive legendaries. -Champions excluded, Hoenn probably has the worst Elite Four in the series, with incredibly boring, repetitive teams. -Completing the national dex was insanely convoluted, as Pokemon were split up across multiple games and spinoffs. You needed at bare minimum 4 games, a Gamecube and a Gamecube to GBA cable to do it. Gen 4: Pros: -Physical/Special split, increasing the viability of a lot of Pokemon. -Introduced WiFi, making trading MUCH easier. -Expanded the TM list, allowing for more options. -Most of the new Pokemon introduced had good stats and movepools. My favourite new batch of Pokemon. -Gave much-needed evolutions to many mediocre old Pokemon. -The “route split” where you can choose whether to fight Maylene or Wake 3rd, was kind of well-done. -Best starters in the series imo. Cons: -Diamond and Pearl are PAINFULLY SLOW. Both on the field and in battle. Saving takes forever. Surfing is horrendous. Platinum fixed some of this though. -Diamond and Pearl’s regional dex is horrible. Only one Fire type besides the starters, some of the newly-introduced Pokemon aren’t even in the dex! -And they made some very questionable choices to go with it. Protip: if your regional dex only has two Fire type lines, you PROBABLY shouldn’t have a Fire type Elite Four member. -Team Galactic and Cyrus are my least favourite villains by far. Their plot is a giant mess and it’s not paced well. I could go into more detail, of all their encounters before the halfway point, only one has any bearing on their main goal. The rest are just random acts of villainy for no reason. The Grunts don’t even know what the bosses are planning. -Main story is badly paced, HUGE drought between badges 2 and 3 (fixed in Platinum), and the massive level jump between Gym 8 and the Elite 4 forces a ton of grinding right at the very end (also fixed in Platinum) -No random online battling. -GTS is a mess, only trade via online forums or chatrooms. -Worst Safari Zone in the series by far. -The snow routes are awful. Good music though. Gen 5: Pros: -The fresh start the series desperately needed. -A regional dex of all new Pokemon. -Most new Pokemon have VERY good stats. -Main adventure is very balanced overall. Pokemon are available at just the right times, for the most part (Larvesta and Deino are exceptions) -Introduction of exp scaling, making it hard to get too overleveled during the main story and letting you more easily train low-level Pokemon to Lv 50 in the postgame. -HMs, besides one forced use of Cut, are entirely optional. Thank Arceus. -Gym Leaders are decently challenging, and actually do things in the story. -Some of the best storylines and characters in a Pokemon game. -Awesome twist on the formula at the end. -BW2 are full sequels instead of 3rd versions. Add new areas.. -BW2 has the best balance of old vs new in a regional dex, with an almost exactly 50/50 split. Some old Pokemon are given fresh new spins, like Riolu and Eevee being catchable early in the game. -BW2 has probably the best postgame in the series. -PWT is an awesome callback and a pretty fun battle facility. -Battle Facilities in general stopped cheating as much as they used to. -Added Shiny Charm, giving a non-cosmetic reward for completing the Dex. Cons: -Competitive metagame was kind of a mess, Smogon had to make several complex bans to try and keep everything under control. Mostly only applies to Singles though. -Introduced random online battles, but Ragequitting was rampant. -Introduced Triple and Rotation Battles, but were very under-used and barely anyone plays them competitively. -Worst starters in the series imo. -The Unova region is very linear and, at least in BW1, a quarter of it is postgame-only. -BW2′s plot was far more standard for a Pokemon game. -Some of the new Pokemon evolve at painfully high levels, which got bad when they showed up earlier in later games. Gen 6:

Pros: -First full 3D main series game. -I kind of like Kalos as a region. -Added Fairy type, helping nerf Dragons. (Though they might have gone overboard, Fairy is now kind of overpowered) -The starters are pretty good. -Ruby/Sapphire remakes were nice. -Added tons of nice Quality-Of-Life features, especially making breeding and EV training WAY easier and more accessible. -WiFi is amazing, especially the PSS. -A lot of Pokemon available in the dex. -Sycamore is a cool professor. Shame he wasn’t the Champion. -You won’t know it if you use the Exp Share, but basic trainers are actually very challenging, often having smart movesets and strategies, even egg moves. Try a no-exp share run sometime. These are actually among the hardest Pokemon games if you do. -The postgame Looker quest actually has a better story than the main game.

Cons: -Game Freak did a total 180 on their stance with Gen 5, and decided Pokemon would now be all about the old rather than the new. The games began a trend of GF extensively pandering to Genwunners at the expense of actual new stuff. Very few new Pokemon, all of them almost intentionally made rare. It almost felt like GF was ASHAMED of them, and had to hide them from the wrath of the Genwunners. Other pandering included a direct rehash of Viridian Forest, Snorlax, and a forced first encounter with a Pidgey. Not a new Pokemon, a Pidgey. -Worst tutorials in the series. It’s possible to catch a full team of 6... AND THEN BE GIVEN THE CAPTURE TUTORIAL. -Way too many rivals. Tierno and Trevor are barely there, and Calem/Serena feels undeveloped. -Team Flare are my second least-favourite evil team. They shouldn’t have bothered trying to hide Lysandre as the villain, it was so obvious. -Early pacing issues. Big gap between Gyms 1 and 2 (could’ve easily been solved by making Clemont Leader 2), Team Flare plot doesn’t start until pretty late in. -Worst Champion in the entire series. -Most Gym Leaders and all the E4 not named Seibold are jokes. (XY are weird in that on a challenge run, you’ll be steamrolling the bosses but getting destroyed by basic trainers) -THE EXP SHARE IS HORRIFICALLY BROKEN. Have it on all game, and you’ll be overleveling everyone by 20-30. It ruins what would otherwise be a pretty challenging game. -Kalos Route 13 is the worst route in Pokemon history. -THEY BROUGHT BACK SINNOH’S STICKING MUD, WHY?! -Sky Battles and Inverse Battles are really underused for something they spent a lot of effort marketing. Neither can be done in multiplayer. Sky Battles limited to a bunch of one-time trainers, Inverse Battles limited to only one. Neither can be done in multiplayer. -Controversial opinion, but I actually really hate Super Training. The EVs/Time ratio is way too small to be worth it, horde battles are far better. I only use it to finish off the last couple of EVs on a spread. -Mega Evolution is a mixed bag. It makes some weaker Pokemon useful (Beedrill, Kangaskhan, Charizard), but also makes some already good Pokemon even better (Scizor, Metagross, Gengar, Lucario, SALAMENCE). This means a lot of the more interesting Mega options go unused because you can only have one Mega slot. Evidence of not just popularity power, but more Genwunner pandering is on display. I like Charizard and Mewtwo, but I don’t think they needed two Megas. And NO Gen 5 Megas at all, and even after ORAS only one? (And it’s terrible?) -No new non-Uber legendaries, instead re-using, you guessed it, the Gen 1 legendaries. Gen 7:

Pros: -NO MORE HMs, FINALLY! -More new Pokemon than Gen 6. Each new Pokemon is given at least one unique gameplay trait, which is cool. -Alola is a pretty nice region. -Story and characters are great. Not as good as BW but a big step up from XY. -Team Skull are hilarious, playing all the unintentionally funny things about past evil teams for intentional comedy, almost acting as a bit of self-aware parody. -Genwunner pandering is less evident. Yeah only Gen 1 Pokes got Alolan Forms, but most of them needed upgrades anyway. NPCs from all gens get cameos, not just Gen 1 NPCs. -The Big Bad of vanilla Sun/Moon is a great villain. -The Exp Share is actually kind of balanced now, oddly enough. -Some of the trials are great boss fights, even better than most Gyms. -Poke Pelago’s “EV Bake Oven” allows for easy EV training. Cons: -Went back on a lot of Gen 6′s good multiplayer features. Festival Plaza is confusing and terrible. -Removed horde battles, replacing them with the extremely annoying SOS Battles. This also means EV training is a lot harder. Poke Pelago is good, but it’s non-interactive. -The first island is very hand-holdy and takes a while. -Island 3 feels oddly small for how big it’s supposed to be. -Still not THAT many new Pokemon. -Crabrawler and Charjabug’s evolution methods are DUMB, making them useless for the main story despite being catchable early. -USUM ruined Sun/Moon’s Big Bad’s characterization. Overall favourite to least-favourite: Gen 5 Gen 2 Gen 7 Gen 3 Gen 1 Gen 6 Gen 4 (But my favourite for competitive battling)

#Pokemon #Opinions #Thoughts #Generation 1 #Generation 2 #Generation 3 #Generation 4 #Generation 5 #Generation 6 #Generation 7

10 notes · View notes

terselylove · 6 years

Photo

50 Surprisingly Simple Coping Mechanisms To Chase Away Anxiety by January Nelson 1. A weighted blanket has done wonders for me. It feels like a giant hug. Add some calm acoustic music and about 30 minutes later I am 10x calmer. 2. Going in a bathroom and putting my hands under running water. 3. Confined spaces. It’s easier for me to calm down when my universe is very small. Even just sitting under a blanket can help. 4. Name 5 things you can see, 4 things you can hear, 3 things you can touch, and something you can smell and/or taste. Usually by the end of this your mind has drifted away from whatever anxiety I was having. Remembering to take a deep breath and long exhale helps too. 5. Draw a circle on a pad of paper then place your writing tool in the middle of the circle. For whatever weird reason when I’m not too far gone that actually helps a lot. It’s something my therapist told me a while back and I brushed it off but it helps calm me down. 6. My friend got me out of a panic attack pretty quickly by just having me focus on my hands. Placing them on the table, raising above my head. It re-centers your brain almost like a reboot because for me at least a panic attack is when my anxiety gets so high my brain short circuits and everything is in overdrive. 7. Taking a lap. When I feel like the walls are closing in, I excuse myself from wherever I am and go for a walk around the block to get fresh air and a little exercise. 8. Sleep. My psychiatrist helped me realize that when my anxiety is really bad that it’s related to how little sleep I’ve had. It’s as if my body is too tired to fight the anxiety. Recently when no matter how much sleep I got or xanax I took it still wouldn’t stop, I knew it was time for a daily med change. Just know that it can and will get easier. 9. I usually put on something that would make me laugh. A comedy show or something. I also put on a snuggly sweater or a bathrobe, so I feel comfortable and warm. But what really helps me out is being able to spend time with someone who gets it and will listen and then redirect me. Playing games with my friends has been good for that. 10. Focusing on tightening and relaxing every muscle in my body one at a time. 11. Crying. I know it sounds weird but its instant relief for me. You just gotta let it out. 12. I just think to myself: “But will I die?” The answer is always no. I may be anxious about something, but I know I can get through it. It helps. 13. Here’s a trick you can try. Hold onto the most anxious thought you got in your head right now, and keep asking that thought in your head “so what?” and let that thought constantly explain itself until it runs out of air. For example: “What if your former classmates will mock you if they found out you still lived with your parents?” “So what?” “You’ll never move out of your parents home.” “So what?” “You won’t be able to date anyone properly if you live with parents.” “So what?” “You will die lonely and never experience true love.” “So what?” “If you won’t be loved, you’ll be miserable for the rest of your life.” “So what?” “That would be painful.” “So what?” “…?” “Good.” 14. Being creative, drawing, painting or doing something with your hands helps to take your mind off of what’s causing the anxiety and can be a helpful outlet for getting your emotions out in a healthy way as well. 15. Concentrating on my breath and breathing slowly seems to help me feel more in control of my body and its reaction to the situation. When possible it helps me to try to recall a really happy memory in as much detail as possible: where was I, in relation to what else, what was the weather like that day, what could I smell in that moment, etc. Stepping outside into cool/fresh air also seems to help as well. Anxiety is a bitch, but you certainly aren’t alone. 16. I carry a small rock in my pocket that i fidget with when I get anxious. 17. Remembering that feelings are temporary and whether it’s in a few minutes or hours or tomorrow, I’m gonna feel better than I do right now. 18. Walking and splashing water on my face help. Slowly drinking water helps (this one can be good for crying kids too! It’s hard to cry when you’re drinking and more water isn’t a bad thing.) Cooler air helps me too, for some reason. 19. I do two main things. One is acceptance of suffering, this just means that I accept I have no right to necessarily feel good all the time and suffering/worrying etc. Is part of life. The other is breathing… more specifically, I imagine there is a cup on top of my belly and I want to make it go up and down… this causes more stomach based breathing witch kinda opens my diaphragm more and helps me relax. 20. Square breathing. Out for 4. Hold for 4. In for 4. Hold for 4. Repeat until I feel better. 21. Writing out what I’m feeling. I have a google doc that’s basically an anxiety diary. I write out how I’m feeling, what I think made me feel that way (or simply that my heart is racing and I have no idea why, and that’s okay) and if it’s something I can brainstorm ideas to help, I do that. It’s something just for me so I can be as honest as I need to be. Getting my feelings out and in a place I can see it, contemplate it, organize it better than I could in my head, usually makes me better. 22. Rainymood.com IMO the best site on the internet. Brown noise like rain helps to block out sound and focus me on something. 23. Contextualizing. My therapist taught me to take a step back and try to identify what exactly was making me anxious, then ask myself why. If the brain triggers a fear response to protect you from “harm,” it must have some reasoning to think that response is appropriate. What past experience or knowledge is causing my anxiety to flare up? No trying to change the response, just trying to understand it. The process of analyzing my own reasoning for being anxious soothes my mind and usually reminds me that the world isn’t ending. This often helps to ground me a bit. 24. Kittens. Seriously though. I find cuddling up with one of my three cats can be really calming. Also, reading a book, although that may not be for everyone. 25. Physical puzzle games (like the Eno or a rubiks cube)! They give my brain something to focus on and solve instead of getting stuck in an anxiety spiral. Similarly, embroidery! Mostly just stuff you do with your hands that redirects your brain, I guess. 26. Swimming. I can force myself to focus on just one thing instead of all the things going wrong and might go wrong and should go wrong. The racing thoughts just stop and is replaced with various tasks for myself, ex. “For this lap, just focus on your arms and shoulders, focus on getting a long stretch. For this next lap, focus on just the push from your legs. Okay, your breathing and heart rate are elevated, slow backstroke this lap and just focus on bringing that back down.” 27. Watching a movie – usually fantasy or sci fi…something out of this world that I can focus my attention on. 28. Focusing on my breathing and then if that doesn’t work, physically stepping away/leaving the situation. 29. Focusing on my surroundings. See what colors are near you, shapes, textures. Listen to sounds. Notice the feeling of the air on your skin, the wind or your breath. Try to really notice the things around you. Do that for a good 30 seconds and it usually helps me calm down and makes the racing thoughts stop and gets my breathing back to normal. 30. UCLA free guided meditation audio links. 31. This doesn’t work if it’s unexpected but my anxiety increases hugely the week before my period. Every month I add notes to those days reminding me that it will get better and to breathe and it will pass etc. When I get really anxious I check my calendar and somehow knowing it’s me telling myself these things helps. 32. Not trying to fight it. I’m not sure this works for everyone but just accepting the situation I am in, bringing awareness to the fact that I have been there before and it will pass often helps considerably. It’s when I push back that I start to become manic, it’s much the same with my insomnia spells. Otherwise I just try to focus on my breathing and if there is an invasive thought I just let it ride it’s way through my mind rather than block it out. 33. Cold air or taking a bath. Talking to someone. Reminding myself that I’m in control of how I feel. 34. Music, and video games. Lots, and lots of video games. 35. I have a conversation with myself. I ask why I’m anxious, reasons why I should be anxious, reasons why I shouldn’t, why I’m afraid, how I should deal with it, etc. Then I just give myself a pep talk afterwards and give myself encouragement that everything will be okay and I’m doing my best. Sometimes it works but other times the anxiety is overwhelming so I just acknowledge it’s there and force myself to go on with my day and take deep breaths throughout and try not to get angry. 36. I wet myself with water and then fill a bottle with water and go outside for some fresh air and it helps a lot. 37. Sitting in the shower. 38. Going home. Sometimes it all gets too much and I just need to be in a safe place. Better than that though is being with my boyfriend. When I’m around him it’s as if my anxiety brain can’t match the warmth and love he gives to me. 39. Laying down and watching youtube really helps me personally. 40. Silence and holding perfectly still. The latter is complicated by the need for oxygen, so I breathe as slowly and with as little movement as possible. After a minute or two I can usually segue to deeper breathing and carefully controlled stretching, and then to normal movement again. 41. Say out loud what is causing me anxiety. “Driving through rush hour traffic is awful and is giving me anxiety!” Helps some how. 42. Blocking out as much sound/light/touch as I can do that there aren’t too many stimulants for my brain to freak out about. 43. Definitely deep breathing. Also trying to distract myself by doing basic stuff like counting things around me. 44. Xanax. I am sure I’ll catch a bit of hell for that but I have tried breathing exercises, therapy, SSRIs, CBD, meditation. But when an anxiety attack hits me, only Xanax and 10 to 15 mins by myself is all that works. 45. My wife’s heartbeat. There’s lots of little things that can help, but hearing that works the best. 46. Cleaning and organizing things/rooms. 47. Small, manageable goals. If I’m having a panic attack, I just have to accept that it’s happening and focus on breathing. It will always pass. If it’s looping thoughts or rising anxiety, I try to focus on factual positives. Things are rarely ever as bad as my brain would have be believe. 48. My big, 72-pound, rescue dog. It’s like he just knows when I’m having a hard time and will come lay with me… 49. Meditation and deep breathing. It sounds cliche, I know, but trust me it works. Learn it. 50. I know a lot of times when I’m feeling super anxious about something my brain just flips the “everything is terrible and going wrong and nothing is right” switch, and it’s just a downward spiral. Learning to just let myself feel every emotion, even if I know it’s just the anxiety talking has helped me work through the attacks. Validate yourself and your feeling, let yourself feel whatever your brain is throwing at you, and then when you’re calmer you can sort through the emotions. It’s helped me a lot.

0 notes

fashiontrendin-blog · 6 years

Text

Your July Horoscope Is Here and Thinks You’re Doing Great, Sweetie

https://fashion-trendin.com/your-july-horoscope-is-here-and-thinks-youre-doing-great-sweetie/

Your July Horoscope Is Here and Thinks You’re Doing Great, Sweetie

Hi!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sorry for the excessive exclamation points, but I’ve heard that the artist formerly known as “repel-o-scopes” inhabits one of the few cheerful, sunshiney corners of the internet — the kind where you can feel free to make a mini horse reference, which is usually the only kind worth making, imo.

Amelia already clued you in that someone would be hijacking hers and Susan Miller’s well-oiled machine this month, but allow me to officially introduce myself. I write the monthly astrology-meets-personality columns on Man Repeller that you know and love (or that you never read and don’t care for. Whatever. I’m a Leo and I never get offended. I also never bring up the fact that I’m a Leo, like, ever).

If you do know me at all, you know that I think the stars are my dearest friends and that astrology, in its most basic essence, is a vehicle for self-discovery. Full disclosure, I wholeheartedly love anything that claims to know me on an unreachable molecular level. (I’m an INFJ, in case you were wondering.) I also ask this question whenever I meet someone new: If you were a fruit, what kind of fruit would you be? Hmu in the comments with your answer and let me know your zodiac sign as well for an extremely un-scientific study I’m working on. Hint: Every Cancer I’ve ever met has reminded me of lychee.

I may not know as much as our friends at AstrologyZone, but I do know that by the end of July, FIVE PLANETS will be in retrograde, so you may be needing guidance. Let’s get into it.

Cancer

Speaking of lychee: throw some into a flute with peach juice and sparkling wine and you’ve got yourself an Instagram-ready birthday cocktail!!! Drink a few and document the whole experience. You deserve it.

You also deserve a fun-filled birthday month, wherein you hear the phrase “ask and you shall receive” aplenty. Luckily, that’s exactly what the planets are poised to give you! Since Cancer is ruled by the moon, you will float through July largely unaffected by the multiple retrogrades; instead, on the 13th, your floating rock in the sky will give you a little birthday present in the form of a new moon.

New moons offer new perspectives, fresh starts and opportunities for personal rejuvenation. When a new moon hangs out in the Cancer constellation, it’s even more sensitive to your needs and emotions, which makes this one especially powerful. In other words: cancel plans and treat yourself. I won’t tell you to grab a bath bomb and settle in with a candle or two, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do it.

We’re not done yet! More good news aplenty!!! (I’m really into that word right now.) The 5th is a good day to flirt up a storm, since you’ll be getting a boost from lucky Jupiter and magnetic Scorpio. Your charms will be downright irresistible and it would honestly be rude not to take advantage. (If you’re already in a relationship: so? You can still flirt up a storm.) Plus, you’ll be able to pull off any look, so throw on some lingerie and a maybe some dad sneakers, if you’re into that kind of thing.

Leo

Hey fellow sun babies! It’s not our time to shine just yet, although I know we all hate hearing that. I guess technically, for a Leo, it’s always time to shine. This is especially true if you’ve been using this summer to indulge in some bright orange highlighter and bejewled eye lewks, which I think you should.

You probably already know this, but the start of Leo season on the 22nd will bring a rush of white-hot energy. You may not know that shortly after, the 26th might put a damper on your plans to enlist your squad to photograph you in various thirst trap poses by the pool. That’s right, folks: Mercury turns retrograde in Leo at the end of this month and everything will be ruined.

Just kidding! As the old saying goes (?), a little retrograde doesn’t get a lion down. You’ll probably just feel a bit extra frustrated by flaky friends and a bit more sensitive when it comes to criticism. It’s important to remember, especially when Mercury retrograde welcomes an overflow of miscommunication, not to take everything so personally. Go ahead and delete that Slack message to your boss because responding to your email with “sounds good” and no punctuation does not mean that she’s mad at you.

Virgo

Crack open that Febreze ‘cause you’ll be the life of the party this month! By “life,” of course, I mean the caring, responsible voice of reason and by “ party” I mean July’s petri dish of emotional upheaval. It’s a good thing you always carry hand sanitizer, tissues and a label maker because July might get messy (for everyone else).

For you, dear Virgo, July will see your relationships thrive. On the 10th, you will welcome Venus into your midst and she is one saucy minx. Venus is the planet of love, affection, beauty, harmony and — excellent news! — she is sailing straight through the sky. No retrograde nonsense here! People will gravitate towards you during this time, asking for advice or perhaps a shoulder to cry on.

Now enough about everyone else, let’s focus on your own specific agenda (I know, I know, I’ll stop flirting. I know you love a good plan). On the 12th, you’ll be promotion-level productive, so make sure you have plenty of coffee at your disposal. You’ll feel the urge to work on the 14th but it’s a Saturday so put the damn computer down and go for a walk; this is actually a great day to be personally productive, so call your mom or enjoy a date night. The 22nd will be the best of all, but it’ll also be full of surprises, so I can’t tell you why.

Libra

There aren’t any fun zodiac-themed greetings for Libras because what kind of cute joke can you make about scales? Who decided that Libra would be the only sign represented by an inanimate object? If I were one of you, I would sue. (Also notable: When I began to search “why is Libra represented by an object” the first thing to auto-fill was “why is Libra the best sign,” which, true.)

But anyway, hey! You cuties can pretty much kick back this month. Nothing’s floating in or around your aura, and your ruling planet is hanging out with Virgo, which will have a significant chilling effect on your loud-ass mental whirrings. Three cheers for a good night’s sleep!

Not to sound like your mom or your money-tracking app, but the beginning of July would be a great time to balance your budget. Jupiter’s final days of retrograde will seriously impact your impulse control. Since you already gravitate towards pretty things and warm weather can feel like an invitation for an all-new wardrobe, this is a good time to practice financial restraint — mostly because you’ll probably fail, but at least you’ll have some perriwinkle hoop earrings that you bought on sale to comfort you.

One expense the stars will encourage this month is travel. Quit eyeing that ridiculously cheap round-trip flight to Paris and grab a baguette instead! You probably can’t take it on the plane but, you know, it’ll get you in the mood.

Scorpio

My regrettable ex-boyfriend is a Scorpio which leads me to believe that you’ll be causing trouble this month, but I would say that every month, so I’ll try to put my personal biases aside for now (even though everyone has an ex who’s a Scorpio; it’s kind of your thing).

On the 10th, Jupiter will leave retrograde and that is such good news. It’s especially fortunate for you since Jupiter has been hanging out with the cluster of stars that allegedly resembles a scorpion, so you’ll probably feel a sudden wave of confidence and electricity. This is an excellent time to take risks and watch them pay off — right in front of your very eyes! Be bold with your propositions and you may just find yourself on a date around the 22nd. If romance doesn’t interest you right now, get your friends together and indulge in a heart-to-heart. Venus’ understanding, compassionate energy will be on your side.

Also, a word of caution: I said “take risks” and “be bold” but I did NOT say “act without thinking” and “be impulsive.” Jupiter’s morale boost will last for some time, so don’t rush into anything! July’s blessings will come in the form of a slow burn, so chill out as much as you can. Drive around at twilight and blast Drake, as you are wont to do. His brand new album Scorpion has 25 freaking songs which is, length-wise, basically the rapper’s version of Avengers: Infinity War, so you don’t have to worry about getting bored. Plus, there’s a track called “Emotionless” AND one called “In My Feelings,” so if this isn’t a Scorpio’s ideal soundtrack of extremes then idk what is. Bottom line, marinate with your options before hopping on a flight to Vegas and betting it all on black 15 (…just my ex? No? Okay).

Sagittarius

Alright my celestial equestrians, you can finally stop tripping over your own feet and succumbing to bottomless YouTube spirals wherein you watch “RIP Vine” compilations on a loop. Jupiter is FINALLY figuring itself out on the 10th, and as your ruling planet, it owes you a personal apology when it does.

Sagittarius is a naturally lucky sign — thanks in large part to Jupiter, the planet of luck, expansion, celebration and encouragement. Having Jupiter watch over you is like having an internal treasure map. So its retrograde was probably super frustrating for the archers of the world because it slows everything down; it causes dreams to sputter and ideas to be questioned.

The 10th, then, will be like a breath of fresh air. It will also bring a ton of financial benefits. I might even advise you to invest if I knew anything at all about investing. Jupiter’s remaining placement in Scorpio and the second house seems to suggest that you may come into some money through inheritance or insurance…..but that has the potential to seem pretty dark so let’s forget I even brought it up. If you suddenly find a wad of cash in your underwear drawer, I wouldn’t question it. July is all about infuriatingly unwavering optimism.

Capricorn

I should let you know up front that I have an inexplicable soft spot for Capricorns, so what I’m about to tell you hurts me more than it hurts you. But try to look on the bright side: A Leo (me) loves you with all her heart, and that should feel like the sun is giving you a hug!!!

Pluto is still in retrograde and it’s still trying to drag you out into its reject outer orbit. Being the planet of change and transformation, Pluto retrograde in Capricorn is a particularly tumultuous time — especially at work or within traditional family dynamics. If you’ve recently felt the urge to withdraw, you’re not alone.

Tread particularly lightly on the 12th, when Pluto picks a fight with the sun in Cancer. Both placements care deeply about the domestic sphere, but in opposition, their brief squabble will increase sensitivity and concern; you may be left feeling unmoored and insecure. Reach out to friends for support and resist the temptation to lash out at family members.

OKAY, back to the fun stuff! You didn’t think I’d leave you on that gloomy note, right? On the 14th, I’ll bet that you get a note or bouquet from a secret admirer or something. Romantic and furtive forces are afoot, colluding for your benefit. Then on the 28th, all your secret fuzzy feelings will be validated when Venus swoops in to offer you a grand gesture. Remember to be open and vulnerable and accept love with an open heart!! (And I’ll remember to sign the card on your bouquet this time!)

Aquarius

I don’t typically like to swear when I’ve been hired to produce something in a ~professional capacity~ but HOLY SHIT this is YOUR MONTH. The blood moon on the evening of the 27th and morning of the 28th will be the LONGEST LUNAR ECLIPSE IN A CENTURY and if that doesn’t make you want to swear and type in caps lock then you’re not a real Aquarius!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If you’re not in the eastern hemisphere, you won’t be able to see this astral phenomenon, but I guarantee that you’ll be able to feel it. This will probably be a day full of surprises, unexpected happenings and unconventional behavior. In other words, this is an environment where the water bearers thrive. It may also be a day of endings, but not in a sad way — if you’ve been waiting for “the right time” to let go of whatever is hurting your heart, unconsciously or otherwise, this lunar phase boasts fertile, encouraging soil.

Also, if you’ll allow me to rewind a bit, the 5th is the perfect day to tell someone to fuck off (I’ve already sworn for you once, I may as well get it out of my system now). Mercury in Leo is about to square up with Mars in Aquarius, combining the explosive powers of honesty and action. You’ll get a little riled up — but in an understandable, righteous way — and whatever you’re mad about, I think you should go with it. How often do you get to rightfully put someone in their place and justify it with a horoscope?

Pisces

Oh boy, my fishy friend, here’s the deal: You’ll be dealing with a double-whammy in the nostalgia department for a little while. Your ruling planet, Neptune, is home in Pisces and that probably feels comforting, albeit a little overwhelming — like how it might feel if your mom crashed on your sofa for a couple weeks. You may love the taste of familiar home-cooked meals from childhood, but your emotional barometer is extra sensitive.

On top of that, Neptune sailed into retrograde on June 18th (as is the theme with fickle planets this month), and you’re probably still adjusting to its effects. Before we get in any deeper, I’d like to get a few things out of the way: don’t text your ex; don’t question the decision to quit the job that you literally left months ago; don’t look at your “On This Day” memories on Facebook.

In general, don’t get lost in romanticism or reveries — particularly on the 8th, because someone from your past is going to reemerge and I can’t promise that entertaining their sweet nothings will leave you with anything except an empty bottle of wine and half-finished cheese plate. Entertaining guests isn’t always satisfying.

But you know what else is gonna experience a resurgence in July? Yes, the Mission: Impossible franchise, but MORE IMPORTANTLY, your reputation! I know that sounded like a backhanded compliment, but I promise I didn’t mean it that way. I just meant that the 24th will bring a bright moment of clarity. Whatever has been holding you back will feel suddenly more manageable, and people will notice your surge of focus, motivation and creativity.

Aries

Not to sound like a total downer, but this month won’t be a walk in the park for the rams of the world. Mars retrograde, which only happens about once every two years, is upon us for the entire month and it just won’t leave us alone!!!!!!!!

Mars’ moonwalk through the sky generally causes sluggishness and lack of motivation. If this just sounds like a regular summer slump, don’t be fooled: you may notice projects or relationships that fizzle to a finish for no reason at all. This retrograde spares no mortal but because Mars rules Aries, you will feel its effects more than the average human (but then again, you feel most things more than the average human, you fiery little wingnut. Love you!).

I’m not just here for the bad news, however! I’m here for Mars retrograde as an opportunity to scale back and reevaluate. You’ll probably feel more patient; more inclined to think things through before jumping in, horns first. Rams tend to be “Go, Diego, Go!” but under the scorching summer sun, this is the perfect time to recharge: pop on a pair of tiny sunglasses, throw on some lime green pants and head to the beach instead! You have the planets’ permission.

Taurus

I assume you are familiar with a little term that’s been making the Twitter rounds recently: Big Dick Energy. If so, I would like to applaud and apologize simultaneously. The former because, congratulations, you are plugged into internet culture! The latter because, honestly, I am not entirely convinced the former is a good thing. And also because BDE has forced me to consider the sexual magnetism of people I’ve never wanted to, from Pete Davidson to Troy Bolton’s father (although, to be fair, also some people whose sexual magnetism I think about daily, like Rihanna).

That wasn’t entirely relevant to the task at hand, I just wanted to make it known that Taurus is the sign that most obviously and commonly exudes BDE in the zodiac. Okay, back to the real news.

So on the 12th, your ruling planet Venus — which is hanging out with your fellow earth sign Virgo — will mingle with Uranus — which is currently hanging out with you, Taurus — and I know that sounds complicated but I’ve got the spicy breakdown. Things are gonna heat way the hell up, you will feel sexy and your BDE will reach its greatest and most powerful frequency (now you see why I had the acronym on my mind! It’s all coming together!!).

It’s natural to feel a little frustration on the 25th, when your desire to be seen and desire to hide will reach a maddeningly similar level. One-on-one intimacy will serve as your middle ground, an island of comfort in the midst of inner chaos. Okay, I’m making this sound more dramatic than it is. Just avoid parties and call your best friend.

Gemini

This is unrelated to your horoscope, but I was just looking at photos of Mary-Kate and Ashley and feeling resentful that their transcendent power has been overshadowed by their departure from “the grid.” I have a Gemini moon and I still feel their twin influence (twinfluence? I’ll show myself out) every single day.

As usual, since you are a chatty little star child, Mercury retrograde will hit you like a ton of meteorites (“a ton of bricks” feels too mundane for our purposes). Mercury is your ruling planet, so it sucks that it’s the planet most often working in reverse — but it’s also kinda cool because Sage the Gemini’s banger “Reverse” works for you on multiple levels at various points throughout the year. Everyone loves a playlist staple!

This retrograde starts on the 25th, which is a Monday, so try to get important work done before that. In fact, if you have any vacation days saved up, just get lost that week and we’ll touch base again in August. I think we’d all prefer to be left alone by the Geminis in our lives as they adjust to the first five days of Mercury’s pre-medieval torture.

Luckily, pre-retrograde July will treat you well. You may even be offered a job, a raise or some kind of promotion, so keep those peepers peeled for opportunities to strut your stuff (as if you don’t already).

Illustration by Cynthia Merhej.

http://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js

0 notes