#also imagine being genuinely mad about voice recasts could not be me

[disastercit]

idk where yall are getting all this camp camp news i cant find anything other than the instagram post

[honoviadakai]

What you favorite Hazbin hotel song says about you 😈🎶😇

(This list includes songs from the pilot as well as a few others that are not official but are near and dear to the fandom's collective heart)

I’m always chasing rainbows 🌈:

…so how’s your relationship with your parents?

You have a good heart but you’re way too hard on yourself

You don’t always have to be busting your ass off, taking breaks is not a crime

Also failing is not the end of the world

I believe in you, please be kinder to yourself

Inside of every demon is a rainbow 🌈 😈:

Golden retriever energy

You are so sweet but so naive

I honestly feel like if this is your fav song, I could spit in your meal and you'd just smile and get a new plate

It's ok to go apeshit

If you did ever get mad I genuinely feel like you'd be absolutely terrifying

But you're such a sweet person, i can't imagine someone pushing you to that point

Inside of every demon is a lost cause/Alastor's reprise 🎶👿:

You're a cynical bastard and you wear that shit like a badge of honor

You're on the same page as Alastor in terms of redemption being impossible/pointless

If this song is your favorite, you laugh at children when they fall over

very loudly

You're the one in your friend group that everyone has to warn about before introducing you to new people

You receive the bombastic side eye so often you smile every time it happens

ADDICT🕸️🚬:

You need a hug

All of the hugs

You're doing your best and I just want you to know I'm proud of you

Vox's Interlude📺🎶:

You like Dubstep

You like Dubstep to a concerning degree

You're also disappointed Vox doesn't have the same voice effect in cannon that he has in the song

You're a Vox simp, but you're really chill about it

Royal Flush🥃♥️♠️♦️♣️:

Hello my fellow Pansexuals and Husk Fans~

If this if your favorite song, you're a Mick Lauer fan and you were sad to hear he wasn't coming back to the official series and it made you even more jaded than you already were(I feel you)

You're also a fan of Johnathan Young and Rock music

You lowkey giggle every time you hear the "every hole is a goal" line

You probably have a sever resting bitch face that scares ppl sometimes, but deep down you're a softy

A jaded softy, but a softy

Radio Play📻🎶:

Hello Alastor fans that lament the recasting of Edward Bosco

Hello Black Gyrph0n fans that think he's not receiving enough recognition

How deep in the financial debt hole are you because of your love of Alastor and new found desire to have a retro 30's aesthetic once this song dropped?

You have good taste in music but I feel like you'd say out of pocket shit on accident

You probably know how to do the Charleston pretty well and that's pretty cool

Redemption arc🙏🎶:

Hello my depressed gifted child burnouts and Elise Lovelock fans

You're a girlboss, you really are, but I need you to take more breaks and drink more water

You strike me as someone who takes the phrase "act your wage" as a suggestion at best

If over thinking was an Olympic sport, you'd win gold, silver ans bronze

stop trying to carrying other people's baggage on top of your own, that's not building character, its building more work for your therapist

Assuming you've even allowed yourself to see one!

Insane🦌🔪:

You're unhinged

like Niffty levels unhinged

but you have good taste in music

You're also a very vocal Alastor fan

You need to be watched 24/7 because you strike me as someone who'd commit war crimes for fun

Eyes on me📺🥲:

You like Techno a normal amount

you're probably a Bo Burnham fan

You also give the vibe that you like anime like Evangalion

as well as the vibe of hiding behind a chill facade even though you're kinda depressed

you also give the impression that you're into enemies to lovers and once sided pining in romance

You ship Vox x Alastor in a wholesome way and you're foaming at the mouth for their backstory

You hate Val(as you should)

Change the order 👑🪽:

You lament that Lucifer doesn't have a British accent

You HEAVILY lament Lucifer not being a heartless asshole

You oh so desperately wanna see Lucifer and Lilith in their prime/as a united power couple

You have slight daddy issues

You're also probably someone who grew up with some religious trauma

You're in your villain arc but it's mostly yo protect yourself

i highly suggest getting a dog, a rubber duck collection and a therapist

Get hooked🚬🦋:

Your search history is not suitable for human eyes

You definitely have daddy issues

You desperately wanna see Val on the poles

You're fun at partied but you cannot be left unsupervised under any circumstances

You radiate bad bitch energy but I feel like you'd apologize to a kindly janitor if you had to walk on a floor they just finished mopping

You can run in heels and I respect that immensely

Smile like you mean it😁🦌:

I get it! You love Alastor! Please lower your voice a tad friend!

It's concerning how quick you'd sell your soul to this man

You like jazz unironically(nice)

You wanna experience one of Al's radio shows

...I'm not entirely sure if you wanna hear it or be the victim...and that deeply concerns me

Use me up🕷️🥲:

You wanna see Angle Dust fuck shit up(same)

You don't make friends easily but you're the loyalest son of a bitch anyone could ever have and more people need to recognize that

You probably had a really rough childhood

You give ppl middle fingers and sass the way Oprah gave out cars back in the day

You just want a hug, someone to say they're proud of you(I'm proud of you friend) and a month long nap

We're sure to drown🐈‍⬛🥃🥺:

Hello again my fellow Pansexuals and Husk fans

Specifically the ones with severe depression, trust issues and think mixing Tequila and monster energy drinks will help with the abandonment issues

yeah, i see you, put the bottle down mf

get therapy, this a threat

You're so cynical that even shadow the hedgehog would ask if you're ok

asking for help doesn't make you weak fam, i get where your coming from but you need a good plucking you prickly cactus

oddly enough, you give the best advice to the few friends you keep in your circle but take none of your own advice

You listen to country rock with lyrics so sad that everyone in the car with you immediately get concerned

definitely a cat person

POP!👁️💥:

You either wanna be stepped on or do the stepping on

You probably watched Black Lagoon and loved Revy

If you don't know what I'm talking about, look her up, that's your type

Low key probably a pyromaniac

You're that one friend that's ALWAYS ready to punch your friend's ex's in the face

Honestly, I feel like you're scrappy enough to fist fight god with the confidence of someone who thinks they have a shot at winning

My machine 🐍 ⚙️:

You were really excited to see Pentious be one of the show's antagonists

You're still a little bitter about not getting your mad scientist, steam punk, snake man

You did love his War General outfit though

You probably really like shows like Arcane

You really wanted 'Enemies to lovers' CherriSnake or platonic/rivals CherriSnake

You probably have reptile as a pet

most likely a snake

Happy day in hell🎶🎤:

You're a basic Broadway bitch but your optimism is a tad infectious so I'll let it slide

You're a tad too optimistic though

Like, to a concerning degree

Someone could punch you and you'd ask them if they were ok despite having a split lip

you're definitely a workaholic

take that PTO sweetie, work will be there when you come back

Hell is forever😇😈:

you either really like Alex Brightman or you LOVE villains

you also love rock

You kicked your feet like a love sick when Adam did the guitar solo bit

Probably a fan of bands like Skillet

You have religious trauma but your coping mechanism is to crack jokes about it

some of them are probably inappropriate

Stayed gone📺🦌:

You ship Vox x Alastor a "normal" amount

You'd sell your soul for Vox and Al to have more duets together

You're probably a Vox simp

If you're not, its cuz you're an Al simp

You giggled at "That's the tea"

You also drooled at Al's demon form towards the end of the song

It starts with sorry🐍🥹:

friend, you are way too forgiving

someone could steal your life's savings and I feel like you'd just let them have it because "they probably need it more"

You were very proud of Pentious

Respectless💅📱:

You radiate chihuahua energy

You are 5'2 or smaller and 90 lbs soaking wet

someone need to make sure you don't run these streets lawless

don't get me wrong

You are absolutely a bad bitch that serves cunt like a 5 star restaurant serves gourmet steak

but you're gonna say the wrong thing to the wrong person one day

you cannot afford to fuck around and find out when they're over 5'9 my friend, sit down please

Whatever it takes🦋🩰:

you're the eldest child of your family aren't you

You don't need to prioritize everyone before yourself!

Love yourself first damn it!

You probably like Milfs or goths

You also probably wish Zestial had more songs

I have a feeling your favorite Disney movie is Encanto...

Poison🚬🕷️🥺:

Holy fuck you need a hug

You're either a survivor of some kind or life has just been kicking you in the balls for no god damn reason

Come here, I'm adopting you and making sure you're actually happy

You're low key an amazing dancer

literally one of the best people to be friends with

Loser Baby🐈‍⬛🕷️:

hello my fellow queers, Keith David fans, Blake Roman fans and Huskerdust shippers

You are a connoisseur of slow burn romance

You're probably a depressed hopeless romantic

friend, if you want the Husker to your dust...the loser to your baby...you gotta talk to people...

go touch grass

you're that one friend who bullies your bestie but that's cuz that your guy's love language

If anyone messed with your bestie, you'd fight that person to the death the way Husk and Angel did to those loan sharks

Hell's greatest dad🪽🦌:

You either beef with ppl for fun or you're a very flamboyant theater kid

Its probably both tbh

You probably fell in love with the blonde short king after this song

You ship Radioapple

you want a sitcom ft Radioapple and you'd sell your soul to get it

Your fav Disney movie is probably Aladdin

You totally play "HaHA! Fuck you..." on repeat

More than anything🪽😭:

So how's your relationship with your dad...

You cried so hard to this song that it scared you

grab the tissues, get your coziest blanket and go get your favorite treat

and some therapy

Welcome to Heaven😇🎶:

Emily is your favorite character

Your gaydar was going off when St. Peter started existing

Your a chill person

A little too chill though…

You might still be an active member of your community

Ya might wanna consider reducing your hours, there is such a thing as too much loyalty

Treat yourself to a vacation

You didn't know😧🪽:

Hello fellow black sheep of the family with severe religious trauma

You freaked the fuck out when the “If Hell is forever then Heaven must be a lie” line dropped

You felt so vindicated after this song and honestly, same

You LOVED Emily by the end of this song

Out for love 💗 🩰:

You like MILFs

You want Carmilla to kick/step on you

You’re either a magical girl fan, a fan of Latin music or both

You cheered so hard for Vaggie at the end you definitely got a noise complaint 🤣

Ready for this🎤⚔️:

You have anxiety

Your favorite character is probably Charlie

Your favorite movie is probably Marry Poppins or something in the same time period/genre

You’ve dealt with Karen’s before and watching Susan become tolerable was so satisfying for you

You want Alastor and Rosie to adopt you

More than anything(reprise):

You're the poster child of sappy hopeless romantics

You cried a little from joy here

You’re definitely not straight

You want this moment, go get yourself a Vaggie cuz you’re definitely gonna be the Charlie of the relationship

Finale🎶🎆:

You're the ultimate theater kid

This song hit all the sweet spots in your depressed brain for you

Let’s be honest, your favorite part of the song was either the Vees or Alastor

It’d your favorite part was with the Vees, your a huge chaos gremlin

You cannot be trusted with information but you’re very fun at parties

If your favorite part was Alastor’s part, get therapy

If you related to that part on a spiritual level, you mask so hard I’d believe you if you said you were born wearing a mask

[castcharmperson]

Bruh that Taako thing was great!!! Is it possible I could request a part two? 👀👀👀

Hey!!! You’re great!!! Thanks for this nice ask!!!

Part two is way more dialogue heavy than I expected, and I’m sort of ignoring 5e with how the spell Silence works. But that’s fine!

[link to part one]

The Winter Solstice was hardly the event of the season. It wasn’t a party like it’s twin, The Summer Solstice. Nor was it a bombastic celebration like Candlenights. The Winter Solstice was traditionally a day spent eating food and sitting around a bonfire. Angus was going to be home from school anyway, but the weeks leading up to the holiday were filled with letters from Magnus and more formal invitations on Taako’s Taako Brand TM stationary, insisting the entire family had to be home for the first Starblaster Extended Crew celebration of the Solstice.

When Angus arrived, he figured he shouldn’t be surprised that Magnus had converted the empty pool into a safe location for the bonfire. There must have been a small forest worth of chopped wood stacked in there.

“You want to do the honors, kid?” Lup had offered him once everyone had gathered together. “I’m told you’ve mastered Scorching Ray.” Ah, so she also hadn’t forgotten The Dispel Magic Incident, or DMI as he’d taken referring to it in his notes. They shared a look, but neither of them said anything. Instead, Angus cast the spell and the bonfire ignited. Magnus, Carey, and Killian cheered, while Taako brushed past everyone to get back inside to the kitchen.

“Taako! Can I help with dinner?” Angus asked, following him into the house.

“I don’t know, squirt, this is kind of a one elf job.” Taako wasn’t looking at him, busying himself with taking a roast out to thaw.

“Well that’s perfect, because I’m not an elf!”

Taako sighed, but didn’t shoo him away. He didn’t turn around either and Angus couldn’t get any new notes for this case if Taako wouldn’t look at him. His Insight mod was high, but not that high. “Besides, I’ve been gone for a while. I’m sure you’ve got new spells to teach me.”

That made Taako pause. They had both decidedly spent the last few days of summer pretending nothing had happened and, at that time, Angus was fine with that. But The World’s Greatest Detective could only wait so long before the need for answers weighed more than the need to keep the peace with his family.

Taako still wouldn’t turn around though. He gave a blunt laugh before gathering a few more dishes that had been frozen overnight. “So this is how we’re going to do this, huh?”

“Either like this, or I can cast Zone of Truth,” Angus offered, perhaps leaning too heavily into his ‘cheerily helpful’ disposition.

“Aglet,” Taako’s voice was sharp and so was his expression when finally turned to face Angus. He was still leaning back on the counter, faux casual, but his eyeshadow was a different color. The Disguise Self must have worn off- how did he recast it without Angus even noticing? “What part of ‘you didn’t see anything’ did you not understand?”

“The part where you’ve been hiding a limp all day.”

Taako scoffed and rolled his eyes.“I thought Magnus talked to you about doing this detective bullshit on the family.” Angus knew he was going to lose this lead unless he made a bigger move.

“It’s not bullshit when someone’s keeping secrets–”

“Watch your fucking language–”

“You’re the one who said no one was supposed to keep secrets anymore!” Angus hadn’t mean to raise his voice, wasn’t really aware that he’d done it until it was done. He never used to do that. He was pretty sure he had to increase his volume after spending as much time around a family that constantly talked over each other.

He heard the change before he felt the magic settle over the room. Before Angus became a wizard, he had a few different items that could cast Silence for him, but the spell had a different power behind it when cast by one of the most talented mages in the multiverse.

He was so distracted by the spell that he didn’t notice Taako walk across the kitchen until he was towering over Angus. The boy had grown a little, during his semester away, but not enough to really forget how much shorter he was than everyone except Merle and Davenport.

“I don’t know what game you’re trying to play, but I promise you, McDonald, you will lose.”

This lead was absolutely getting away from him. He needed to change tactics, try a different approach, maybe make good on his threat for Zone of Truth. His spell DC might be high enough, despite how charismatic Taako was. He was the World’s Greatest Detective, he could still crack this case.

Instead, he panicked. “Are you okay?”

That made Taako take a step back, nearly stumbling before grabbing onto the back of one of the kitchen chairs. “What?”

“I want to know what happened.” Angus took a bold step forward, but Taako only laughed, the same harsh sound he made first time Angus called him and the others on their horseshit back on the Rockport Limited.

“You’re barely ten years old, you don’t know what you want!”

“I’m twelve!”

“So I’ve got a whole year before you can start this teenage rebellion bullshit. Ango, this feast is not going to cook itself and I–”

Taako started to turn away. This was his last chance. “My parents died in the Relic Wars.”

If Taako had looked horrified when Angus saw his scars, if he’d been confused when Angus asked if he was okay, those were nothing compared to this. For a moment, he wondered if he’d stopped speaking Common, but any other language he could possibly know, he’s sure Taako would have understood.

“That. Um.” Taako’s left leg seemed to buckle for a second before he grabbed the back of the chair again. With a defeated sigh, he sat down. “I’m going to ruin dinner because of this.”

“Probably not, sir, you’re a very good chef.”

“Obviously,” Taako muttered, scrubbing a hand across his face. His make up didn’t smudge, but with a snap of his fingers, it was gone completely. His hair fell loose around his shoulders and his freckles stopped shimmering in imaginary starlight. “Fine, okay, let’s turn this into a teachable moment. Barry and Lup are liches, right?”

“Yes…” Angus wasn’t sure where this was going, but at least it was going somewhere. He pulled out another chair and sat down.

“You better pray Istus never fates you to meet any others. Others liches are what did this to me. And to Merle and to Magnus.”

The Wonderland mission had been a nightmare. Having the Reclaimers drop off the map, then Magnus not coming home. Merle had an eyepatch and Taako… With the chaos that followed, the literal end of the world, Angus hadn’t noticed anything different about Taako.

“I’m the worst detective,” he mumbled, but Taako put hand on his shoulder bringing him back to the present.

“Hey.” For the first time since Silence was cast, Taako didn’t seem angry with him anymore. “You are the best detective. World’s Greatest. How’d you get started with all that anyway?”

“Tried to find out what happened with my parents.”

“Bet Cresha didn’t make that easy for you.”

“No, she did not.” They shared a small laugh, though Angus assumed for different reasons. A non-magical silence lingered for a moment before Angus was able to look at Taako again. “Does it hurt?”

“Gotta be more specific than that, kiddo.” Taako stretched and Angus heard several joints pop.

“You face?”

“Physically, no.”

“Emotionally?”

“Uh-uh-uh!” Taako shook a finger so close to Angus’s face that he nearly went cross eyed. When he focused on Taako again, the elf was grinning. “I already let you slip two questions in on that turn. Don’t try to pull a fast one on a flip wizard. Taako’s turn now. Where’d you get that scar?” He pointed to the back of Angus’s hand.

“My grandfather stabbed me with a fork.”

Taako nearly choked, strained and genuine laugh squeezing through his throat. “The fuck? What did you do?”

“It was an accident. Where’d you get your scar?”

“Gotta be more specific. Why’d you ask me to teach you magic?”

Angus huffed, and crossed his arms over his chest. “You are not making this easy.”

“Didn’t say I would.” Taako mirrored his posture, smirking in a way that Angus found strangely comforting. “Answer my question.”

Angus shrugged. “What you did on the train was pretty cool.”

“Hey, am I bullshitting on my answers? No, I’m not. Do not make me cast Zone of Truth, young man.”

“You don’t have that spell.”

“Fuck you, I don’t have that spell. I’ve got whatever fucking spell I want.” Taako moved to stand, but seemed to think better of it and slouched back down. Angus still didn’t say anything. Taako, surprisingly, stayed quiet, waiting him out. All his detective training had prepared him pretty well for being on the other side of interrogations, but he found himself fidgeting in the silence after only a minute.

“Grandpa wasn’t… all there? I guess. You guys were the first people to… I don’t know.” For all the books Angus had read, not many of them offered a word for what that feeling had been. “I asked Magnus to teach me to fight, but he said I was too young. And, uh, Merle wasn’t…”

“Yeah, no, I remember how Merle was.”

“Was he not like that on the Starblaster?”

“You still haven’t answered my question, but I’ll give you a freebee.” Taako leaned back. He’d been paying pretty close attention when Angus was speaking, but now he seemed to focus on something off in the distance. “No, he wasn’t like that on the Starblaster. Was your grandpa mad when you didn’t bring the silverware?”

“He was dead before I got there.”

Taako’s attention slid back to him, but his posture stayed loose. “You don’t seem very upset about that.”

Angus shrugged. “What happened to your legs?”

“Washing machine fell on me.”

Angus tried not to react to that. It was surprisingly easy, mostly because the idea was so hard to imagine he couldn’t really react at all. He leaned back in his chair, mirroring Taako to the best of his ability despite his feet not reaching the floor. “You don’t seem very upset about that.”

“Oh trust me, I am. It’s just,” Taako barked out a laugh, “It’s so stupid? Like it didn’t even make any sense? This big dumb thing just fell on me out of nowhere!” He laughed again, shaking his head and staring at nothing again. “Do you miss your parents?”

“I didn’t really know them, so no, not really. Do you miss your home planet?��

Taako scoffed. “Definitely not. Why’d you go to Lucas’s shitty school?”

Angus thought about bullshitting an answer again. It would have been easy to say he’d already been enrolled in The Academy before Taako announced he was opening a school. And that wouldn’t even be a lie! It’s what had happened. But he could have talked to Lucas, could have found a way to transfer. He had considered doing so, but something had stopped him. That same feeling he didn’t really have a word for.

“Because I’m already in your school.”

Taako didn’t react at first, just blinking at nothing, but then he was blinking at Angus. He tilted his head, as if a different angle could help him better see through a lie that wasn’t there. Angus shrugged at Taako’s unasked question and Taako broke into a grin. “And that’s exactly what I want to hear from my favorite student.”

Angus found himself matching the smile, enjoying the unexpected success before he remembered why he started this game in the first place. “Why were you mad when I cast Dispel Magic?”

Taako shook his head. “Wasn’t mad. You scared the fuck outta me. Where’d you learn that spell?”

“Barry taught me.”

“Son of a bitch…”

Angus pressed on. “Do your legs hurt?”

Taako’s grin slid off his face, but he kept staring at Angus. There was something brighter about his eyes, focused like this and without the glamour. He was quiet for a long time before sighing and nodding a little. He looked down, at the way his legs draped out from the chair, unposed, as close to comfortable as it was possible to be in a kitchen chair. When he looked back at Angus, he seemed strangely determined.

“All the damn time.”

“Why don’t you tell anyone?”

Taako held up his index finger again, smile returned. “Uh-uh! Not your turn.” When Taako didn’t follow with a question, Angus tried not to get inpatient. He really seemed to be thinking about it before leveling Angus was a surprisingly serious, but focused, expression. “Are you okay?”

Taako had asked him this question only twice before. The rest of the Birds asked him pretty often, but it was different when it came from Taako. When Lucretia asked Angus if he was okay, he expected it. She had brought an eleven-year-old onto a secret moonbase; she thought he was her responsibility, like the rest of the weight of the world was. Davenport asked because he was the Captain and Captains made sure their crew was okay. Magnus wore his heart on his sleeve, so did Lup and Barry. They asked in that familiar, comforting way. Merle was a cleric, he usually asked if Angus was okay in regards to exclusively physical matters.

For all Taako pretend to be “good out here,” to be an idiot wizard, that disguise was flimsy within minutes of Angus meeting him, much more so after all his memories returned. Despite Lucretia being his Boss and Davenport as the family’s Captain, Taako was his Mentor.

The first time Taako had asked if he was okay was after The Story and Song. He was standing on shaky legs after fighting for his life and struggling to focus on anything in front of him after a century was shoved into his mind. Taako had put a hand on his shoulder and the world held together just a little bit longer.

The second time Taako had asked if he was okay was the day after The Detect Magic Incident.

“Yes Taako. I’m okay.”

“Good.” Taako gave a small smile, before clapping his hands together and starting to stand. His grip on the back of the chair turned his knuckles white, but he was steady on his feet. He didn’t bother looking at Angus’s concerned expression. “And before you ask, no, it is not always this bad. Holiday had me on my feet a lot.”

“One last question?” Angus asked anyway.

Taako sighed, rolling not just his eyes but lolling his whole body in a put-upon motion. “Fiiine. But you’re peeling all the potatoes.”

“That’s fair.” Angus hopped out of his seat and Taako handed him the potato peeler. He got through the first one, letting Taako focus on seasoning the roast. “Why wont you tell anyone?”

Taako didn’t answer for a while, but Angus didn’t feel impatient anymore. He went through three more potatoes before Taako finally said, “They’re all…” He sighed, and Angus tried to look at him without turning his head, despite his glasses not clearing that part of his vision. Taako was making the sort of hand gesture he usually used when talking about his family. “Because they’re stupid.” He finally settled on that and Angus put down the potato peeler to put his hands on his hips.

“That’s a bullshit answer.”

“Well it’s true!”

Angus didn’t budge and Taako laughed. “Istus, you’d be adorable like that if I didn’t know you knew Zone of Truth. Okay, yeah. Cresha’s already a mess, I don’t really need to dunk more guilt on her because she is, in fact, the idiot who sent us there. Dav is… Dav, so he’s always weird about when we get hurt. Barry and Magnus and Merle were all there and– and Lup was too. They’re going to be weird about it.

“And it’s not like on the Starblaster where we’d get hurt but it was better next cycle. There is no next cycle. I’m going to be like this forever. And Krav, he hasn’t said anything about it yet, but I know he wants to see ‘the real me’ or whatever stupid sappy thing that you are too young to understand–”

“I’m twelve, I understand how basic decency works.”

“Shut up. And everyone is going to want it to be all the time and I don’t… I don’t want that.”

“You don’t have to tell everyone.”

Taako just shook his head. “You shouldn’t even know about this. No one was supposed to know.”

“I won’t tell anyone. But you should at least tell Lup.” He didn’t need a hundred years of memories in his head to know that, despite how close everyone on the Starblaster was, the twins were something else.

“I can’t tell Lup.”

Neither of them were sure when the Silence spell had worn off, or how long she’d been leaning against the doorframe to the kitchen when Lup chimed in. “Can’t tell Lup what?”

[secret-engima]

Snippet of Deleantur (pt2)

(continuation from later on in this one-shot that continues to spiral out of control. Friendly summary is that Deleantur is a time-traveling Noctis who went back way further than he intended, but that’s okay since it just meant he saved the world in time to save Ardyn too. Of course, he’s the only one who knows about that time-travel bit, so other people are Very Confused at times)

     Somnus was genuinely overjoyed when Deleantur finally expressed interest in fishing at a large pool they stumbled across. Because as boring as it was to wait around while Deleantur tirelessly hunted down fish with his rod and line, it was a sign of the young man he, Ardyn, and Aera had been coming to know —a sign of the brother Somnus and Ardyn were coming to love as fiercely as they ever had each other—.

     Somnus even made an effort to demonstrate as much by sitting next to Deleantur on his chosen rock, watching the ripples in the water as Deleantur patiently reeled in his line again and recast in hopes of a bite, “You have a lot of patience for this.”

     Deleantur hummed, “I like it.”

     Somnus huffed, “Yes, but-. You aren’t this patient with other activities. It’s …” unusual, strange, interesting, “different.”

     “That’s because it doesn’t hurt.”

     Somnus stilled and behind him, Ardyn and Aera did too, “…Hurt?”

     Deleantur gave a low noise as he adjusted his grip on his fishing pole, “Yeah.” Deleantur paused, like he was considering something, then continued, “When I was a kid, about … eight years old. I … couldn’t do a lot of stuff. It hurt too much and I was already constantly tired from the medication and the physical therapy. I didn’t want to go outside, even though they said sunshine and fresh air would help me. I didn’t want to … play or run or jump, but books were boring and heavy. So Dad took me out one day and … taught me to fish. He showed me his fishing rod and his line and his lures, taught me how to hold the rod and throw a line, then we sat there together and waited for a fish.”

     Deleantur’s tone was nostalgic and Somnus didn’t dare speak, because this was the first time Deleantur had ever truly talked about his father or his childhood. Deleantur fidgeted with his reel, “I think if I’d been any other kid, it would have been boring. But it was outdoors, and I had a perfect excuse to sit still in the sunshine for hours, and … and Dad was there. Dad was teaching me. So I practiced, and I begged to go fishing whenever I could because I knew he’d come with me to show me how it was done and eventually I … loved it. It reminds me of those days. Before…” Deleantur’s voice trailed off, and breath hitched with sadness.

     Ardyn, who had settled silently on Deleantur’s other side at some point in the story, asked, “Why was it so painful for you to move? Did your father not know the recipes for your powerful healing draughts?” Because potions and elixirs did not require the magic of the Crystal they’d learned, just careful selection of ingredients and even more careful preparation.

     Deleantur did that gesture with his shoulders that he used so often, “Potions and elixirs only work so well. Especially when it’s … serious. If I’d gotten one as soon as it happened, maybe it would have worked, but I didn’t, so I had to recover the slow way.”

     “Recover from what?”

     Deleantur looked up from his fishing, considered the two of them, then reached back with one hand to tug his tunic hem up just enough to show the small of his back and a bit of his spine. Ardyn sucked in a sharp breath at the sight of the old scars stretching along the small of Noctis’s back, each at least as wide as two of Somnus’s fingers. The scars disappeared under his clothes in both directions, hinting at a size and damage larger than they could see and Somnus winced, because even he could tell that whatever had left those was … bad. They also looked distinctly like blade scars. Or possibly claws.

     Ardyn reached out with a shaking hand and it was a testament to how far they’d come in earning his trust that Deleantur didn’t flinch away from the gentle touch, just went back to his fishing with a quiet, “A daemon attack. Ripped open the car. Killed the bodyguards, then took out the woman trying to get me to safety. I’m not sure if it was aiming for me that time, or if my getting caught in it was just an … accident. It was going to finish me off when my dad and his guards showed up and drove it off, but by that point the damage was done.”

     Ardyn was still tracing the scars with a reverent touch, “It’s a miracle you survived this. It’s a miracle you can walk. I can only imagine-.” Ardyn stopped and went very quiet. So quiet Deleantur lowered his rod and twisted around to look at Ardyn in concern. Ardyn looked over his shoulder at Aera who was watching from a polite distance with a vaguely horrified expression, then looked back, “You are in pain, aren’t you? All the time. That’s why you limp, why you sleep so often and yet you-. All of this travel, and battle, and hard labor. Why?” Why would you do that to yourself?

     Deleantur sighed and slipped his fishing rod back into armiger with a flick of his wrist, shifted to face them, “It’s my duty.”

     Aera finally joined the conversation, settling down on the grass just behind their rock as she whispered, “You’ve mentioned duty before. What duty drives you to such lengths? No one knew you were of royal blood until a few months ago. Have you not already done enough?”

     Deleantur shook his head, “No. No it’s-. It’s not over,” his expression folded briefly, weary and old again before it smoothed out, “it’s never going to be over. I made a promise. I’m going to fulfill it.” He shook his head again, like a man trying to clear away an inner fog, “Besides, it’s not so bad. I’m … used to it. And it’s better now,” blue eyes glanced at them through thick lashes, “I’m not alone anymore.”

     Aera didn’t smile like she usually would have, just reached out her hands like Ardyn was already doing, “Can we-? May we try? To ease your pain?”

     Deleantur waved their hands away, “Don’t waste your time. The scars are … old, and I’m used to them.” He blinked at their expressions and insisted, “Seriously, I’m fine. I’m used to it, and if Sy- if the healers couldn’t fix it when it was fresh, you aren’t going to be able to fix it now.”

     Somnus watched the two healers of the group fuss and pout, Ardyn going so far as to wax on in a poetic way that was supposed to make Deleantur guilty enough to let him have his way, and tried to fit the newest puzzle pieces of Deleantur into place. Deleantur’s … father —not sire, because that would be Ardyn’s and Somnus’s father— must have been nobility. Deleantur had mentioned servants and guards and what must be one of his strange words for a carriage —Car? Car sounded like it was short for carriage, and Deleantur had a lot of strange words and even stranger ways of using existing words to mean things Somnus would never have associated with them—. Probably the noble of another kingdom, one of the neutral or far away ones, which would explain why Somnus’s father had never caught wind of Deleantur before now.

     But that didn’t explain some of the other things he’d said previously. Or how Deleantur’s mother had met Somnus’s father if her native kingdom did not interact much with Somnus’s. That wouldn’t explain why Deleantur was traveling around here instead of his home country —and Somnus would have heard if an entire kingdom fell in the months leading up to the Wave wouldn’t he?— or who Noctis was, the mysterious King of the Crystal Deleantur had only ever mentioned once. Ardyn had brought up the possibility of Noctis being Deleantur’s elder twin brother, which might explain that part, but that still didn’t explain how they’d learned to purify the starscourge or why Deleantur hadn’t returned to his home kingdom to help out the peasants there rather than the ones here.

     Not that Somnus wanted Deleantur to leave. He’d gotten attached to his mad, unexpected sibling.

     Somnus’s thoughts were interrupted by a startled yelp from Ardyn and a sudden splash of water rippling up onto the rock. Somnus looked up in mild alarm. Ardyn was missing from the rock, Aera was smothering laughter into her hands and Deleantur was grinning, honest to Astrals grinning, like a child who had successfully stolen something from under the cooks’ noses, and Ardyn was-.

     Resurfacing from the pond water, sputtering and sulking, violet red hair hanging in front of his face like a soaking curtain and his precious embroidered white tunic —the only royal garb Ardyn had refused to part with— already turning see-through from all the liquid it was absorbing. Somnus took several long seconds to process that Deleantur, mad, broken, usually too-serious Deleantur had just pushed Ardyn into the pond just to make him be quiet.

     If it had been Somnus that had suffered such a fate, Ardyn would have immediately moved to help him out like a dutiful older brother should, checking for injuries and fussing about possible illnesses brought about by the cold water and the diseases of the pond weeds or some such nonsense. Ardyn would have smiled like a lunatic, but politely refrained from outright laughter until after Somnus was safely ensconced on dry land and dressed in fresh, dry clothes with a possibly a cup of comforting wine in hand.

     Somnus, being the shamelessly cruel little brother that he was, sat there for a good two minutes pointing at Ardyn’s misery and laughing until his sides hurt.

     Ardyn, who could have swum to the sloping, pebbled section of the bank and climbed out on his own at any time, chose instead to tread water and pout at them the entire time, whining melodramatically about cruel siblings and horrible fates and all the things he could fall ill of here in the water —the silly grin on his face gave it all away for the show it was—.

     Ardyn eventually splashed water at the rock and Deleantur scooted to his feet to escape the assault. Somnus just snickered and leaned away from the stray droplets before finally crouching at the edge of the rock and holding out a hand for his brother, “Come on then, Brother, can’t have you suffering a watery demise just yet.” Ardyn reached out a hand and took Somnus’s and then-.

     Water.

     Somnus resurfaced with a spluttering squawk, flailing against Ardyn’s chest as his brother tried not to be shoved under by Somnus’s sudden submersion, “De- Deleantur!” Somnus had done nothing —much— to deserve being pushed in like that-.

     There was a watery, coughing laugh just to his side and Somnus blinked past the wet hair in his eyes at … Deleantur. Treading water next to them and looking just as surprised as they were.

     All three Lucis Caelums looked up to the rock … at Aera, who stood on the rock with a serene smile worthy of temple statues on her face as she fluttered her eyelashes and asked if the three of them were alright. A picture of holy innocence and decorum and kindness the filthy little liar. As if her shoulders weren’t shaking with suppressed laughter and her hands weren’t still outstretched from pushing Deleantur into Somnus in such a way as to make them both topple into the pond at the same time.

     Deleantur broke the brothers’ stunned silence  first, laughing so hard Ardyn and Somnus had to hold him up for fear he’d stop treading water and sink right to the bottom. They dragged each other out of the water, Deleantur still giggling helplessly like a child, and though Somnus scowled and swore revenge against Aera for her treachery, they all knew there was no real bite to his words, not when Deleantur was laughing louder and freer than they’d thought possible.