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jasontoddsmommyissues · 2 years ago

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Unsmooth Operator

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Femme!Reader

Summary: It’s summer in Hawkins and Eddie finds himself caught up on the cute girl working at the record store in the mall

Warnings: Reader uses she/her pronouns, brief mentions of sexual content (nothing sexual actually happens), swearing, potentially lethal levels of adorableness

A/N: First of all, sorry it’s been so long since I posted my last fic. My poor little ADHD self is a slow writer, I’m afraid. But anyway, I kind of wrote this as a sort of prequel to my Henderson!Reader fic, but there’s no direct mention of Reader being related to anyone, so you can either read it as that or not. Also, special thanks to Mr. Joseph Quinn for confirming that Eddie Munson has no game.

My Master List | Ao3

It’s June in Hawkins and the summer heat has already grown practically unbearable. The shitty window A/C unit Eddie’s been using has finally crapped out, and in the heat of the day the trailer is approximately the temperature of the sun. Mercifully, he’s found a sweet, air conditioned refuge in the newly built Starcourt mall, a temple to 20th century decadence and consumerism that also happens to be a very pleasant temperature inside.

Jeff and Gareth are tagging along today, which is fun except for the quick pit stop they had to make at the homegoods store so Gareth could pick up some new linens for his mom. They’ve finished that now, though, and Eddie’s already got their next destination in mind.

“I’m gonna do it”, Gareth insists as they go, “I’m gonna get a tattoo.”

“Your mom would kill you”, Jeff replies.”remember when she caught you smoking? I thought she wasn’t going to let us see you ever again after that.”

“It’s different now”, Gareth tells him, “I’m 16. I’m gonna be a junior. It’s time I make my own choices, you know?”

“Good luck with that”, Jeff laughs.

“Let’s hit the record store next”, Eddie cuts in, “I want to pick up the new Bob Dylan album for Wayne.”

“More like you wanna see the cute girl working the register”, Jeff teases.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about”, Eddie retorts, desperately hoping his cheeks aren’t actually turning as red as he thinks they are.

In truth, he does have an ulterior motive for wanting to go to the record store, and it is you. You’ve been going to Hawkins High for the past three years, but admittedly Eddie had never really been more than vaguely aware of your existence until this past semester, when you two had PE together. He had this routine he’d do where he would imitate the gym teacher when the man wasn’t looking, and it never failed to elicit a giggle from you. One day Eddie noticed how cute you looked when you laughed and well, he’s been a little bit stuck on you ever since.

“Why don’t you just ask her out?” Gareth comments, as if it’s just that easy.

Sweet, naive Gareth. Maybe for guys like Steve Harrington it’s that easy, but Eddie isn’t Steve Harrington. Gareth wasn’t there for Eddie’s early high school days. He wasn’t there during Eddie’s sophomore year when two hot juniors decided to prank him by convincing him their cheerleader friend was “super into him” or his junior year when he invited that girl from drama club to join Hellfire and she laughed out loud at him. Most girls don’t even want to be seen with Eddie “the Freak” Munson, let alone date him.

“Jeff’s talking out of his ass”, Eddie lies, “come on, let’s go.”

You are, of course, there at the counter when they walk in, and oh God, is that an Iron Maiden shirt you’re wearing? Fuck, as if he couldn’t be more into you.

“Um, Eddie, you good dude?” Gareth asks him and he realizes he’s stopped right there in the entrance of the store, just staring at you. He quickly turns away and walks the rest of the way into the store, thankful that you’re currently checking out a customer and probably didn’t notice him ogling you like a total weirdo.

Admittedly, this may not have been a good idea, at least if he wants to convince Jeff and Gareth he’s not into you. He quickly grabs a Bob Dylan tape and starts making for the door, desperate to just get out of there and spare himself anymore humiliation.

“Um, you gonna pay for that?” Jeff asks and fuck. He’s shoplifted before but he’s not interested in getting barred from the record store, so he’s not gonna risk it today.

“Right”, he mutters and then he forces himself to go up to the counter.

He feels like his heart is going to explode in his chest when he walks up and you flash him that brilliant smile of yours.

“Hi, Eddie”, you greet and his eyes grow wide because you know his name. Well, obviously you did, you had a class together, but it just sounds so good coming from your mouth that he momentarily ceases to function.

“Did you need help with something?” you ask after a moment.

“What?” Eddie asks, “oh no. Just um, just this.”

He sets the tape on the counter and you grab it to ring it up.

“Dylan”, you comment as you do, “not your usual fare.”

“It’s for my uncle”, Eddie explains, “he’s a big fan.”

“Cool”, you say, “I like your vest by the way. Dio. Nice.”

Well, that’s it. It’s over. Eddie’s done for.

“That’ll be $6.30”, you say.

“Oh, right money”, Eddie sputters and fishes a ten out of his pocket. He knows Jeff and Gareth are standing nearby, watching this all play out and probably laughing with each other about it. He’s definitely never living this down.

“You want a bag”, you ask as you finish gathering his change.

“Oh, I um, I guess”, he replies, not actually processing the question. You hand him his change, then place the tape in a bag and slide it over to him. He goes to grab it, and because he’s not at all paying attention to anything but you, inadvertently sends the display of Beach Boy tapes sitting on the counter tumbling to the floor.

“Oh shit”, he hisses, “oh fuck, I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay”, you reply, coming around the counter, “I keep telling Doug he shouldn’t put that stuff so close to the register.”

You bend down to start picking up the tapes and years worth of Wayne’s lectures on behaving like a gentleman come flooding back to Eddie, so he quickly follows suit.

“Let me help you”, he says.

“Thanks”, you say and you’re smiling again and Eddie kind of wants to die.

With the two of you, it doesn’t take long to get everything cleaned up and back in order.

“I’m really sorry”, Eddie says again as you make your way back behind the counter, and then before he can stop himself, he blurts, “maybe I could make it up to you somehow?”

“What?” you ask, clearly unsure of what he means.

“I mean like, maybe I could buy you a-a coffee or something sometime”, he stammers.

You peer at him for a moment, and he braces for the inevitable rejection he’s about to endure.

“I like ice cream”, you say, “if you meet me here at 3 tomorrow, you can buy me some ice cream and we’ll call it even.”

Maybe Eddie’s already dead and this is heaven. That or he’s being punked somehow. Either way, he stands there like an idiot for a second, trying to process that you just suggested the two of you meet for ice cream.

“Um okay”, he says.

“Cool”, you grin, “see you then.”

“Right”, he says, “see you then.”

And then he’s swiping his bag from the counter and stiffly making his way back to Jeff and Gareth, his body still trapped in a state of shock.

“So”, Jeff prompts, “what was all that?”

“I um, I think I’m meeting her for ice cream tomorrow”, Eddie informs them.

The two younger boys exchange glances, mouths stretching into a matching pair of shit eating grins.

“Talking out of my ass, huh?” Jeff teases.

“Shut up”, Eddie snaps, “I’m just being polite okay? It’s not like a date or anything.”

“Sure it isn’t”, Gareth replies smugly.

“Whatever”, Eddie huffs and the others know not to continue the conversation, even if they spend the rest of the afternoon exchanging amused glances at each other.

Eddie waits until he’s back at the trailer to let everything sink in. When it does, he feels a vague sense of panic washing over him.

Embarrassing as it is, Eddie’s never had a real, serious girlfriend before. Hell, aside from a brief flirtation with Tammy Thompson that ended in a very awkward hand job in the school parking lot, he’s never really had any experience with girls (or boys for that matter) at all. And Tammy was the one that initiated that. He wasn’t even really into her, he was just desperate for some sort of female attention.

You, though, he is into you. Very, very much into you. And he has no idea what the hell he’s supposed to do or say. He finally, finally has a chance to go out with his dream girl, and he’s almost certainly going to say something wrong and scare you off like pretty much everyone he’s ever been into.

He wonders what the weather in Wisconsin is like this time of year, because he’s halfway to hopping in his van and heading there now, never to be seen or heard from in Hawkins, Indiana again.

Then again, maybe he’s over thinking it. It’s not like the word “date” ever came up in your conversation. Maybe this really is just him paying you back for his clumsiness, and afterwards you won’t even spare him a second thought. In the end, he figures that whatever the case, he’s not just going to leave you high and dry, so he has no choice but to go.

Eddie shows up outside the record store at 2:45 the next day. He stands there awkwardly, fiddling with his rings and secretly hoping that you don’t show up and he doesn’t have to deal with all of this.

No such luck though, you appear exactly at 3, looking as cute as ever in your jean skirt.

“Hey”, you greet and Eddie momentarily forgets how to speak.

“Hey”, he repeats, unable to formulate a coherent enough thought to do anything but copy your greeting.

“You ready to go?” you ask and he nods.

The record store is a fair bit away from Scoops Ahoy, and for probably the first time in his life, Eddie finds himself unsure of what exactly to say. Thankfully, you take the lead.

“So, have you heard Megadeth’s album?” you ask, “I got it the first day it came out and I love it.”

“Me too”, Eddie says, and he can feel himself being knocked out of his stupor then, “you know, my friends and I have a metal band.”

“Really?” you ask.

“Yeah”, he tells you, “we perform Wednesdays at the Hideout, if you ever want to come see us.”

“I’ll keep that in mind”, you smile and Eddie thinks his heart momentarily stops.

Walking into Scoops Ahoy with you by his side is an almost unreal experience. You and him go up to the counter and Steve Harrington is there in his little sailor suit that Eddie almost feels sorry that he’s forced to wear.

“Hey Steve”, you greet.

“Hey Y/N”, Steve replies, and then he notices that Eddie’s with you and he gets this super confused look on his face.

“So, uh, get whatever you want I guess”, Eddie says.

Once you two have ordered and gotten your ice cream, you eat it while idly wandering around the mall, just chatting about anything and everything. Eddie, as always, is frequently cracking jokes, and God is it mesmerizing to see the way you laugh in response.

It’s quite the disappointment when you’re finishing your ice cream and you’re bidding him farewell.

He knows he has to at least try to see you again so he tests the waters with a quick “that was fun, we should do it again sometime.”

“I’d like that”, you smile.

“Awesome”, he replies.

“Here”, you say, rooting around in your purse, “give me your hand.”

He obliges, and you produce a pen, which you use to scribble something onto his outstretched hand.

“What’s this?” he asks.

“My number”, you reply, “call me tonight or tomorrow?”

“Sure”, he tells you.

“Great”, you say, “I’ll see you, Eddie.”

“See you”, he says, hoping he doesn’t sound as absolutely lovesick to you as he does to himself.

You flash him one final smile before departing, and he just stands there awkwardly for a second, watching as you go. Once you’ve disappeared from sight and he’s snapped out of his trance, he peers down at the numbers you’d scrawled onto his hand. He has to remind himself that it’d be weird to get them tattooed onto himself permanently. He can’t believe that it worked. You went on a date with him, in public, and didn’t care if you were seen together. You laughed at his jokes. You gave him his number and asked to see him again. You liked him.

The trailer is as unbearably hot as ever when he returns, but for once, he doesn’t care. He’s too excited to call you later and hopefully set up another date.

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arandomdai · 4 months ago

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Beyoncé's Echoville Play

This is just a theory. Enjoy!!!

⚫ The Structure

Beyoncé is going by the 3 act play route for this roll out. This is the build up from the beginning to end of a play and how it's being done. Since we're at the midpoint so far in the COWBOY CARTER era, I think it's more coming (and not a tour). Here, I will explain how everything ties together and my theory on what's to come for Act III.

⚪ Act I: RENAISSANCE (Beginning)

⚪ Opening Scene

Teases RENAISSANCE in Vogue in June 2022

Releases RENAISSANCE in July 2022

⚪ Inticing incident

Teases visuals or movie in "I'M THAT GIRL" teaser in August 2022

Teases RENAISSANCE Tour in February 2023

Kicks off the tour in May and ends it in October of 2023

⚪Plot Point One: Starts Act II⚪

🟡 Act II: COWBOY CARTER (Middle)

🟡 Pinch Pt. 1

Teases COWBOY CARTER at the Grammys in February 2024.

Put out 2 singles (TEXAS HOLD EM and 16 CARRIAGES) during the Superbowl in February 2024

COWBOY CARTER releases in March 2024

🟡 Temporary Triumph

Performs for the NFL halftime show on Christmas 2024

Releases BEYONCÉ BOWL on Netflix the next day

Teases Act II part II or a new song, which is happening on a later date.

_____Midpoint/Plot Twist(Today)_____

🟡 Pinch Pt. 2 ( Theorizing what could happen)

Releases a song or a deluxe of COWBOY CARTER on (this is just a guess) maybe in February, March or in the middle of the year (June or July).

Or possibly put out 2 singles like she did the last time and release the deluxe on the one year anniversary of the album's release. She could possibly tease whats to come in another magazine for Vogue or Rolling Stone (hint hint)

🟡 Calm Before The Storm (Theorizing what could happen)

It's going to be silent until she announces she will perform again at a different location. Perhaps a residency in Vegas or another event.

🟡 Black Moment (Theorizing what could happen)

I think after she does a performance or puts out the final product, she's officially going to end Act II. It's going to be silent for a moment, and then start subtly teasing Act III, which leads me to my Act III theory on how it might go.

🟡Plot Point Two: Starts the final Act...Act III🟡

🔴 Act III: BETTY BLACK... Theory (Resolution) 2026-2027

🔴My Theory on the Betty Black rollout:

I think she's going to do a surprise drop this time ( the third act of a play is normally when it becomes intense and whenever Beyoncé does a surprise drop, it becomes intense... in a good and exciting way for the fans.) I feel as though all her endeavors as far as products, performances, and releases are going to be surprises during the BETTY BLACK era. Also, I have reason to believe she's going to release another trailer just like she did for "I'M THAT GIRL", but I think it's going to be more in the trailer than we think.

🔴 Revelation

Begins to tease Betty Black in Vogue or Rolling Stone magazine giving us tidbits or hints on the Echoville movie

Releases BETTY BLACK in May 2026

Shows up with dark or black hair

🔴 Decision

In 2027, in February after the Superbowl, announces the Betty Black Tour

Kicks off the tour from late April to early to mid October

Releases a new product (different from the Sir Davis, Cecred, or the Perfume line

Release a perfume called "Lé Ombre", or "The Shadow". The final perfume of the perfume line.

And release another Cecred hair care product

🔴 Regroup

Comes out with the official trailer for Echoville and has some parts from that "I'M THAT GIRL" teaser some days after the tour

Starts coming out with posters for the movie with the release date, which I'm gonna guess a week before the movie is in theaters or on a streaming platform

🔴 Climax

She released the Echoville movie which would probably be on October 31st or in the same week of.

🔴 Resolution

Release a video of her telling us thank you for supporting her

Probably announce something prior to ending the entire three acts entirely.

Thank you for reading my theory and thoughts- ☺️❤️

#beyoncé #act i renaissance #act ii cowboy carter #my theories #theories #act iii #betty black #arandomdai #beyhive #music #visuals #music video #beyonce

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mythicaldemigoddess-of-deltarune · 2 years ago

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YES!!! A REAL FNAF SECURITY BREACH RUIN DLC TRAILER!!!!

[Note: FNAF Spoilers, Don’t Read Until You Watched The Trailer. also Don’t Reblog Without Permission]

best day ever, I just learned today about it.

and we finally got a name for the new character as well, the new girl’s name is Cassie.

best day ever, with some not so great stuff that is going on, this is one of the best news ever.

we not only get a real trailer about the new free dlc of FNAFSB...

but we also find out the name of the new playable character. :D

I’m guessing this, but I wonder if Cassie could be Gregory’s Twin Sister.

that is of course, a FNAF Theory. but it’s okay if I’m wrong about Cassie being Gregory’s twin sister, but it could still be possible.

hopefully Cassie will get a Animatronic to help her out like Gregory had Freddy.

I mean it could be possible she might end up having a Animatronic helping her and it not just being her trying to save Gregory on her own.

and it does seem that her being blonde would end up being in Fanon...

well we can always call the blonde version of her by a different name.

I was surprised to find out that the trailer for FNAF Ruin DLC had been put up...

and by the looks of it, it was around May 19, 2023....

so it was yesterday and I’m just learning about it today on May 20, 2023.

but still, it is still the best news ever....

I know I might not be able to play the other future chapters of Deltarune, and might have to wait to do that, but until then I can enjoy playing the two chapters and watch walkthroughs that involve Chapters 1 to 2 as well as the future chapters.

anyway at least the FNAF Ruin DLC is free, and it will be worth the wait.

and well the new chapters for Deltarune will be worth the wait as well.

we just have to wait until July 2023, so around next month.

it is still great news to get to see the official trailer for the Ruin DLC. :)

------

Edit Of May 22, 2023:

in case there is any misunderstandings, I want to point out that

while I said we have to wait until July 2023, I meant for the FNAF Ruin DLC, and NOT the next chapters for Deltarune....though it would be interesting if they both released on the same month, but that might not be likely to happen...

so I wanted to edit this to point out, that when I was talking about the whole we have to wait until July 2023, I was talking about the release for FNAF Ruin DLC.....I thought I would edit this in, in case there is any misinterpretations.

------------

Edit of May 24, 2023:

took me I don’t know how many tries to try to get this to work so I could edit this...

but I kept running into trouble, I kept getting that error loading thing, and the tab even crashed like maybe two or three times...

and I wasn’t getting anywhere just trying to go to my Archive, to open this open and edit it, because it kept showing that error loading and wouldn’t freaking work.

so I had to try to look this post I did, and yeah it still ended up doing that error loading thing, but after trying I guess for a second time...

I was finally able to edit this, and what I wanted to edit in....

was that I had forgot about “June” and the whole FNAF Ruin DLC wont be until, two months...?

so after May, it will be June and then July, with how excited I was, I forgot about the June month coming next after May...

and yeah, it did make me both mad and annoyed that my attempts to edit this was met with that error loading popping up and even the whole tab crashing thing...

this was just suppose to be to point out I had messed up with the month, and I forgot about the June Month, and I know my being so happy about the DLC and I guess I didn’t think about the whole June coming next before July...

anyway, I hope some understand my mistake there...

as well as my not being too happy when I kept running into trouble trying to edit this so I can inform about my mistake I made when saying we had to wait until next month, but it will really be two months right now, but once it becomes June, then it will be one more month...

anyway, the DLC will be worth the wait, and I can’t wait to see Cassie in it and see if she gets her own guardian or not. :)

#fnaf security breach #fnaf ruin dlc #fnaf spoilers #best day of my life #may 2023 #do not reblog without permission #don't reblog

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olderjodijournals · 16 days ago

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Monday, May 2, 2005

It’s May and I’m still cold! Especially at night. Oh, I can’t wait to go to Sacramento!

So far so good with “Pam” next door, even though she does have a dog. It’s a fat, older medium-size dog, but it hasn’t been a problem. At least not yet anyway. We’re dubbing her Pam because she looks like her. When I got a better look at her I could see that she really is about 50 and her hair is all gray. Sure enough, she doesn’t work. Yesterday she had company twice before I got up, but all Tom said he heard was the front door and some hammering. He did hear the dog bark once too, probably at the company. All day today, I never heard a peep out of her or her dog, though I didn’t get up till 2 PM.

Tom enjoyed biking to and from work but says it was rough getting up the hill coming home. He should be used to it in a week or so.

I’m signing up for tons of sweepstakes. I must’ve signed up for over 300 already! All this work better pay off!

Wednesday, May 4, 2005

Tom’s building up to riding his bike to and from work nicely. His legs are rock-hard. It’s a good thing those things don’t turn me on or else I’d be in trouble. I’d be on my own for sure if that were the case. A few people offered to drive him home, including his boss, because it was raining. He turned them down, though, because it was just a little drizzle. It’s good to know that he could get rides if he had to. There’s a guy that lives just up the hill and drives by here all the time.

The new neighbor continues to be quiet, but it’s too soon to say if she’ll stay this way. I wish I were psychic enough to know if it would be quiet here until September of ’06, which is when he thinks we’ll be able to go to California if we save $50 a month and only take $40 a month for ourselves. I’m definitely going to wait and get the mannequin down there. Getting it here would only delay the move and it might break along the way, let alone hog up space in the trailer. We want to get a little U-Haul or something to pull behind the truck.

I hope we only have to suffer through just one more winter here and that it’s a mild one. According to what they’re saying, we came right at the start of summer last year. So, 6 more weeks of shivering. It’s 5-10 degrees warmer in MA, and they don’t get so cold at night like we do.

It was so wonderfully weird discussing the budget/savings plan to move to California. That was only done in my fantasies before, but this time it was for real!

I’m still sweeping away at the sweepstakes. Hopefully, I’ll know in a few months if all this work is going to pay off. I wish they had a program that automatically entered you in all sweepstakes available, and continued to enter you as often as they ran them. Some are daily, weekly, monthly, quarterly, and of course, some are just a one-time deal. I had to pull a few pranks like I did at the celebrity sightings site. Never did it say anything about penalties for fabricating sightings. It doesn’t reward you for your supposed sighting, but still, I couldn’t resist coming up with a tall tale about my meeting Kate and having a one-nighter with her, so here’s the story:

I was 28 years old in 1995 when I met Kate Jackson, then around 45 years of age herself. I am a lesbian who had just had a fight with her girlfriend one summer evening. I was in tears and so I went to my favorite place to be when feeling down – the beach. There wasn’t much activity on the beach, which was a bit odd for June, though it was also after 10 PM. I sat crying with my face in my hands. Suddenly, a woman asked me if I was alright. I looked up and recognized Kate Jackson right away. I couldn’t believe it at first, but it was her, alright. She was dressed casually in jeans and a T-shirt. I looked around me, expecting her to be in the company of others what with her being a star and all, but she was alone. I guess because she was getting older, she felt more comfortable venturing out alone. I briefly told her what happened and she asked me if I was “just friends” with this woman. I assured her we were more than that. That’s when she said, “Well, maybe a night of fun is all you need. Maybe you just need to come up for a fresh breath of air with no strings attached.” I always suspected Kate was either a lesbian or bisexual, and this night would more than confirm that!

I won’t get into the nitty-gritty details because I don’t know if that’s allowed, so I’ll just say I had quite a night, alright! One I’ll never forget. I was nervous at first, but ended up having a great time. She wined and dined me in a quaint, cozy little cottage on the beach which she said was a friend’s, and then we got rather intimate there for a few hours, mixed in with pleasant chatter and mellow music.

When it was over she told me to forget that place forever. Okay, I told her, but I’ll never forget you, and I never have! I’ve only told a few close people about this night, and one of them doesn’t even believe me, but hey, it really, really, did happen!!! It’s no joke. So you could say I had more than a sighting, but quite an encounter instead!

Thursday, May 5, 2005

We’ve had lots of rain. The apple trees look really cool now with their blossoms.

I was just waking up when I heard a faint bark, followed by a louder bark that probably would’ve woken me up, so once again and even though we rarely hear the dog or the lady over there, we’re on for giving notice on the 1st. More than likely, she opened the door to let it out to do its thing, then it went up to the door when it was done and barked to be let in. It’s clearly an indoor dog, thank God!

Tomorrow we’ll be mailing off a $20 money order for 6 1-oz. bottles of Caramel, Pecan Pie, Jasmine, Hugo Boss, Magnolia and Angel oils. Hopefully, nothing will be out of stock, and putting them in the mail and mailing them to me won’t be such a challenge for them. They should ship by next Friday and I should receive them by the Friday after that, but I’m sure I’m going to have to fight for them. If not the PO will screw up.

Friday, May 6, 2005

This morning at 8:45, I saw and heard the dog barking at the dividing fence. I’m sure it was barking at one of next door’s many passings, if not their cats. The woman softly, yet firmly told it to hush. Then after a few more barks, she said, “Come on, Jelly Belly,” and it turned and ran inside.

I was like, fuck this shit! This dog may not be a problem like the Arizona dogs, but I’m sick of being forced to live with other people’s dogs and kids. They’re not my dogs/kids, so I shouldn’t have to be the one to hear them. That’s why I have none of my own; so I don’t have to hear them. Instead, I’m stuck having to deal with listening to everyone else’s, and it gets old. It really does. I better get used to it, though, because Sacramento’s no doubt going to be quite noisy. The warmth should be worth it, as long as we’re not next to what we had in Phoenix. We checked the satellite map and they appear to have rural places close enough to places he could work. The question is, would we be able to afford to rent something like that? Or would we be forced yet again to live wedged tightly in with others and their damn dogs and kids? The dogs down there are going to be kept outside 24/7 by most dog owners and that’s about 90% of the population.

After I heard the dog and they went back inside, I stomped around for a few minutes, hoping she’ll be like, well, you know, it’s awfully soon for me to start racking up complaints here, so maybe I’ll take the dog out in front.

I’m not only sick of dogs and kids, but I’m also sick of this home-all-the-time bullshit! Why can’t we ever be next to someone who works? And why can’t they come up with some real spyware? The kind that not only lets you see the basic design of a city or neighborhood but also detail, too. That way, if there was a place we were thinking of renting, we could see what the neighbors were up to and get to know things like if they had dogs, kids, and massive amounts of visitors.

So I did what I thought I was supposed to be able to stop doing in ’99, and I rearranged the sound machine to help ensure my sleep. I propped it up so that the sound shoots straight on my pillow, rather than upwards. I’ll never be able to sleep without both the fan and sound machine during the daytime. Never. And if I’m wrong about that, then certainly it’s years away from now.

She seems to be mostly a morning person. That’s when I hear more scattered little bumps and bangs, but nothing unusual for being attached to someone. She did laundry at just after 7:30 this morning but didn’t hang anything out. It would’ve gotten rained on anyway.

She also seems to go to bed around 10:00 on weekdays and 11:30 on weekends, though I don’t know why she’d stay up later on weekends when every day is the weekend for her and every day is the weekday.

I’m a little apprehensive about what weekends may bring, along with Memorial Day, and what company may have to be my company, too.

We got a priority mail package delivered here in the name of Dorothy C. We’ve gotten mail for her before. I thought it was the last person in here, but then when we opened the package, which was mailed from Hawaii, we found a Mother’s Day card from her granddaughter. From what Beverly told me, no one who was in here before us was a grandmother, so we’re assuming it was whoever was in here before the last people. If you don’t know that your grandmother moved over what would be a year ago, then you deserve to have the package you sent her opened by someone else! At first Tom was paranoid about it because priority mail is marked as delivered. After I pointed out that the PO’s not going to kick down the door and demand to search the place for it, and that all he had to do if asked was say he brought it to the PO since the box was too big for a mailbox and since the PO doesn’t have cameras like banks to prove/disprove someone was there, we opened it and found souvenirs along with the card. The first thing we pulled out was a boring canvas with individual pockets for mail, bills and coupons. The second thing was a pair of wooden magnet sandals which was kind of cute, so we kept those. I didn’t expect anything too exciting for free, but they’re cool.

Tom thinks that out of every 500-600 sweepstakes entries, be it one-time entries or daily entries, I should hit something. We’ll soon see. If I don’t hit anything in 3-6 months, then I’m not going to bother doing all this work for nothing. For now, I have a sweepstakes system where I do all the daily sweeps until they expire, then I check out the new ones for the previous day. They don’t all come out at once. They come out throughout the day, so that’s why I wait until the next day. At midnight I’ll check yesterday’s sweeps after I do the daily ones. I wish there was a program that would sign me up for every sweepstake out there that I’m eligible for, and as often as each one allows entries.

I decided not to bother saving/spending $40 a month. I just want to get out of this duplex and then out of this state! Until then, I’ll mostly just get oils. Smells are my #1 thing right now anyway, and I’m now plenty used to not getting much in the way of dolls other than an occasional Barbie which would only take up more room when we pack to move.

Sunday, May 8, 2005

Tomorrow would be the earliest I could hear from Marilyn if she got my letter, and if she turned around and wrote back the instant she got it. Somehow I doubt I’ll be hearing from her. Not because she got the letter and decided not to respond, but because she didn’t get it in the first place. Oh well. I tried.

Tom used a large duffel bag to stuff our laundry in and rode his bike to a Laundromat he’s never used before which he said was very nice. He was only gone for 1½ hours. He’ll have to make two trips a week, though, just like with groceries. Once we get moved, we’ll get a washer for sure.

I haven’t heard the dog since the other day. When Tom gets up I’ll ask him how things were with it being a Saturday. I crashed at 11 AM, so I wasn’t around for the most part.

I’ve had severe bloating lately and I can’t figure out why. Most days I’m not overeating, though I could still afford to cut down greatly, and I’m just about over my period. I guess it’s just fat.

Monday, May 9, 2005

Yesterday we walked to a Laundromat we’d never been to before which is right by Fred Meyer. It was a long walk. About a half-hour each way. I felt a little strain in my left hip and a lot of strain in my left ankle. In fact, my ankle is still killing me. At first I thought it was age because I used to walk to school in Longmeadow, and of course Valleyhead made us go on walks, and I was fine. But then I realized that Tom has no problem and he’s 8½ years older. He says it’s just a case of me using muscles I don’t normally use. I guess that’s why variety in exercise is so important. He went through this when he first started riding his bike, but now his muscles are getting used to it.

It drizzled on us all the way and was even cold at times despite the heavy jacket and gloves I wore. I was like, what’s wrong with this picture? What’s wrong with it is that it’s May and I’m still fucking cold! I can’t wait to get out of this state. Especially since there’s snow on the ground right now! Snow in May? That is so fucked up! Nonetheless, it was good walking weather, and the blooming flowers and cherry and apple trees were pretty to see. They seem to really like tulips and daffodils here. Meanwhile, it’s been pouring since I got up 3 hours ago. I’m glad it never rained hard on us.

Tom had to wait a little while for a washer, but it only ran for 32 minutes, so it wasn’t too bad. We never bothered to dry the clothes. Instead, I hung them around here when we got back.

While he was washing the clothes, I got a few things we needed at Fred’s, including the other doll in the My Scene series I wanted which was on sale for $10. This one’s Barbie and she’s wearing purple. She came with a spare outfit which is just about the nicest Barbie-n-friends outfit I’ve got. It’s in the top 5 anyway. The dress she has on is a purple satin dress that goes over one shoulder and has an angled hem. It’s sheer at the waist too, making it look like two pieces from a distance. Her spare outfit is a pink metallic top and a black skirt with zigzag stripes of pink glitter. Her shimmering black shawl makes a great halter for the Tonners.

Anyway, I’m glad I did the walk, as sore as I am. It was fun and it was good to get out and get exercise and fresh air.

On the way back we stopped at a convenience store for snacks and he got a lottery ticket that won $7.

The lady next door not only didn’t have company over the weekend but she was gone for most of it. Can’t complain about that!

I’ve been having a lot of nights where I only sleep for 6 hours. As long as I don’t get too tired, I’d love to be able to sleep for only 6 hours. It’d help me maintain a schedule tremendously.

Although we are going to keep our eyes open in case there’s a hell of a deal that may come along, we’re thinking we may just stay here till we can get out of this damn state, and hope for the best along the way. That would mean the neighbors staying put and not being replaced with nightmares, or becoming nightmares themselves. Meanwhile, we’re not locked into a lease, so if it gets bad here, we’ll split, even if it sets us back a bit. I’ve lived enough places in my life that were a nightmare, so I won’t put up with any shit here. I just hope I won’t have to and that we can go straight to rural Sacramento from here, skip the motels, etc. That may be asking for too much, but if we can at least stay here till we leave the state, then that’d be one last move to have to make along the way. I just wish I had more singing privacy and could blast my speakers. Oh well. I can make do as I have been for another year or a little more. I just hope it doesn’t end up taking us a few years to get out of here. We still have to deal with my teeth either way, and his shit of a mom isn’t going to drop dead anytime soon. She won’t go till we’re settled in California and not as bad off as we are today. My vibes still say she’ll be 86-87, and she won’t even hit 82 till August.

Time to go do my daily sweeping!

Later…

The Phoenix and Tempe letters to Marilyn have been returned as “undeliverable as addressed.” What? Does this site print wrong addresses or something? The Scottsdale one is still out there, so I’ll just hope she got that one, though I highly doubt she did. Same with the sick black bitch. Yeah, I found her. I finally found her. That’s real fucking bold to allow your address to be listed after you got someone thrown in jail. That’s wanting to be killed for it! I doubt she had the brains to think of that, though. If anything she was hoping I’d start up with the journals again so she could get me thrown in jail a second time. But still, could you bait yourself like that after doing what you did? I couldn’t. I’d be too scared to and I don’t usually scare too easily.

Anyway, I sent a quick note to 3 different addresses, one being in Surprise, compliments of the user in Florida. I used some of those postage-paid envelopes I was supposed to send to her friend. At least this time around, associating with her paid off, but just the fact that she hasn’t written and won’t even do me the favor of connecting Hope and me after all I’ve done for her goes to show how truly selfish she is, like most people in this world, or so it seems.

The note was brief and meant as a little scare-tactic, even though I knew it’d be short-lived since I couldn’t possibly have the blessing of doing what I said I was going to do, and that was to sue her and her cop friend for setting me up. Just for her to know I hadn’t forgotten her and knew where she was (assuming any of these addresses were current) was what I was out for. Besides, I promised myself I wouldn’t let what they did scare me from exercising my right to free speech, and that’s exactly what I did. No threats, no racial slurs, just my constitutional right to speak my mind. Meanwhile, if the black pig wants to put time, money and effort into hunting my ass down through Tom’s social security number or his family, I’m ready for him. Yes, this time I’m ready for him, and in the end, I can promise just about anyone that he’ll end up saying, “You know, I am so sorry I ever bothered to find that girl!” if he ever does have the balls to find me. It’ll depend on how suicidal he is. Some people have death wishes, that’s for sure, because cop or no cop, finding me would be a definite death sentence for this mother-fucker. He’d have to make something up, though, because after learning all I have about the laws, thanks to them, nothing I did could possibly call for grounds to come after me. I even handled the letters and envelopes with gloves and used tap water to seal the envelopes, so if they came after me, it’d only be because they hate white Jews as much as I hate blacks.

In the end, I know God made sure none of those letters got to her because they would shake her up, and we know how God not only loves blacks these days but also loves to protect anyone who’s fucked me over, so I’m sure she never got any of them. If I’d been dumb enough to write something they could get me on, then yes, He’d make sure she got one of them then. But if all it could do is piss her off or get her all worried, then no. Her feelings are much too important as opposed to my welfare. Oh, and of course I wrote no return address, so if they ever noticed the Oregon postmark if they got any of them, who knows?

Did I tell Tom? No way! I secretly mailed them from the next block that has an outgoing slot on their boxes. Well, I started to, but then I ran into the mailman as he was doing our own box and he took them from there. I’d never tell him even a decade from now, that’s how paranoid he is. If he knew about it now, he’d still be paranoid they were going to come after me when he was 80. I’m paranoid, too. I mean, these were very determined and obsessive people after all. But life must go on and we must live our lives as we see fit. We can’t let sickos like this scare us and bully us out of taking a stand for ourselves and doing what’s right. I believed firmly that I was doing the right thing by contacting the Arizona Republic and the sicko, and so I did. I don’t know if my email was read any more than if my letters got to the sick bitch, but I did what I felt was best and now I can move on a little easier. Not as easy as I could if they were either made to pay for wronging me or killed, but at least a little easier.

Starting late in my day yesterday, my ankle got better, but both hips have been on fire ever since. I still don’t see how I can get this sore just from walking. Had I walked 20 miles, or run, or gone by bike, then yes, I should be sore.

I see so many pros and cons of staying versus renting a house. I know we’d be taking a gamble either way because we can’t know for sure that it’ll stay quiet here until we can get out of this damn state, nor do we know if it’ll be quiet in a house. Or stay that way if it at least starts off quiet. Although we’re unsure of what’s going to happen, and although my vibes say we’re not giving notice on the 1st, I know there’s a slight chance I could be wrong, so I guess I’ll do a pros/cons list. Sometimes it helps to see them written out, though I know that can still be deceptive if you have a few small pros versus one huge con.

The pros of staying are spacious rooms, good neighborhood, good neighbors (for now), close to stores, each room has its own heater, good shower/toilet pressure, would save money by not moving unless he could find someone reliable or we moved close enough to here to chance taking the truck, bedroom is blocked from street, busy street, garage. That’s a total of 10 pros.

The cons of staying are wet/moldy windows, electric heat, far from work, connected to next door which calls for banging/music, the dog next door, neighboring duplex too close, next door’s doors, expensive, no vent in the bathroom, no self-cleaning oven or self-defrosting fridge, no dishwasher, can’t send/receive mail at the door, no singing privacy, can’t blast speakers. That’s 14 cons.

Thursday, May 12, 2005

I was all set to give next door a stamp of approval, and maybe even consider her better than Bev until a little while ago.

Then yesterday I saw the dog out back at just after 6 AM, but it didn’t bark. Then I decided in the afternoon when I saw her in the yard doing what appeared to be picking up dog shit, to take the direct approach rather than stage an accidental meeting. So I went out saying that I thought it was time I met the new neighbor, and introduced myself. Her name’s Patty and she is on disability. She said her dog, Freckles, who ran up to me barking, yet was friendly, is a service dog that is 13 years old. I told her that if she and her dog are as quiet as they have been, then I hope they’re here as long as we are. She said we were so quiet ourselves and seemed grateful for it, and that she too, uses headphones. She has a housekeeper come out once a week to clean for her and the state pays for it. In fact, that’s who she thought I was at first because she says we sound the same.

She’s lived in Ohio and southern California, but that was many years ago. I told her where we’re from and that we’re saving to move to California. She also says it’s usually warmer by now, but that they’ve had snow in June and July here.

I still can’t believe they allow those on disability to have dogs, vans and cars like she and Bev have, but she said Freckles is a service dog that she’s had ever since she was a baby. We only spoke for a few minutes cuz all I wanted to do was settle my curiosity, though she never did say how long she planned on staying and I didn’t want to pry or give her the idea that I’d be her buddy. She did say to let her know if we needed anything and I said she could do the same. So I thought, yeah, she’s cool, and hopefully Freckles will stay cool, too. She didn’t give me any wild or partying vibes. She’s not as high-strung and doesn’t seem like the type to be a company freak, so I thought that just maybe we were finally being compensated for past assholes we were stuck with, though I still can’t wait for a house in California!

Then, just after 8:00 this morning, I heard more than the usual scattered and subtle bumps and bangs from over there. I could hear the dog barking, but through the walls, it was pretty muffled to the point where it was no big deal. Still, this told me something was going on over there. At first I thought oh no, Bev’s grandkids are back! But when I pressed my ear to the wall, I could hear another adult woman chatting with her. There was no other vehicle parked in the driveway from what I could see unless it was hidden by Patty’s van, so the person was either picked up by Patty or they walked over. She didn’t come alone, though. She came over with a huge black lab much like the one an associate of Bev’s had! They were both barking at the back door to be let in. I don’t know if they heard me yell “Hey!” over the racket, but so much for thinking she may be a better neighbor. Barking dogs would be just as bad as Bev’s grandanimals shaking the place apart. I just never get to live in peace no matter where I go, and I never will, though today’s got me contemplating giving notice once again. It’s just that that could be taking a worse gamble than staying here would be, to say nothing of how it may set us back financially. Besides, I know Tom would prefer to stay here. I’m hesitant to move too, but apartments, duplexes, they’re just too bangy. I didn’t come here to play roommates, which in a sense, is exactly what we are.

I just wish she’d wait for the damn dog at the door. It’s when it comes up to the door to find no one there to let it in that it goes off barking. I’m so sick of being tortured by other people’s dogs and kids! If it’s not one, it’s the other. It never fucking ends. Never. Now the pressure to stay on days is on. The barking really echoes loudly within the confines of the patios. I swear people shouldn’t be allowed dogs unless their nearest neighbor’s at least a half-mile away! They’re just too damn loud.

Anyway, I don’t know who this is. I don’t know if it’s the housekeeper, a friend, a relative, or what. I just hope to hell they’re not staying for a few days! I’m sure they’ll be there for at least most of the day. Therefore, I’ve got the stereo going in the bedroom. It’s not blasting, but it’s going to be if I hear any more barking.

I heard whoever it was go out back with a wind chime and then call out, “I found one” (probably Bev’s old hook).

I hope to hell this person doesn’t come around regularly, because if they’ve brought the dog this time, then they always will. What kind of housekeeper would bring their dog, though? Not this one, I hope! Because if this is the housekeeper, then that means I’ve got to deal with it once a week and even that would be way too much.

I’m just so sick of going through this shit. So fucking sick of it! I don’t make neighbors a part of my noise, so I really wish they wouldn’t make me a part of theirs. As the pizza lady said, though, people just don’t care. They’re going to do whatever it is they’re going to do and to hell with whoever has to deal with it. God, I wish I could stay on days! I’d still have to put up with the noise distracting and annoying me, but it couldn’t wake me up. Not as long as it wasn’t a round-the-clock thing. At least she has a schedule. She seems to sleep from around 10 PM-6 AM, so at least I know that those hours are likely to be peaceful. The afternoons and evenings seem to be pretty quiet, too. She’s definitely a morning person. I wonder if I’ll be early to bed and early to rise when I get old. I doubt it. I mean, I just can’t imagine myself doing that every single day. Being without a schedule is just so much a part of who I am.

If there’s any good news it’s that my oils have been shipped. I can’t wait to try them! They apparently got the money order yesterday, as we figured they would. I could get the oils on Saturday, but more than likely on Monday. This site, unlike Bob’s, has an order status feature that actually works and it was cool to see it go from “on hold pending payment,” to, “in production, will ship soon,” to, “shipping today.” They sent me emails when each thing happened, too.

Later…

Here’s a happy update. After an hour of going bump, bang and bark, though not consistently, there was a knock at the back door just after I finished vacuuming. As soon as I opened it, Patty said she was so, so sorry, and explained that her housekeeper brought her dog over to see if it would get along with hers. Why the hell she’d care if it did or not, beats me, but anyway, she said her housekeeper won’t be bringing it around again and that she told her, “My neighbor just got done telling me how quiet I am which makes me feel all the worse. I don’t want trouble with neighbors.” So I told her it was no big deal and that I really appreciated her letting me know what was up, cuz I was wondering. I just hope there aren’t regular outbursts from over there! For now, though, she’s back to being cool (I think). A part of me still wishes Bev were here. Her animals only came around occasionally, but this dog is always here.

We only spoke for a few minutes and I thanked her again for filling me in and said to let her know if I get noisy myself. She said, “Oh, don’t worry, sweetie. You’re as quiet as a mouse.” I get the impression she doesn’t want us to give notice till we leave the state, which is good if that’s the case, cuz then she’ll be more considerate. I don’t want to gamble on an Oregon house for the same reasons Tom doesn’t, as much as I didn’t come here to play house-sharing.

Friday, May 13, 2005

Although it took us until nearly mid-May to hit the 70s, that’s just what the weather report says we’re going to do tomorrow. Finally! And of course, I have mixed emotions about it. It’ll feel better and do our electric bill a world of good, but a part of me wishes it was cold and snowy so people wouldn’t be as likely to hang outside. So far, mom and daughter next door haven’t been as bad as I thought they’d be, but it’s not summer yet, so we’ll see. I don’t know about next door, but my vibes say mom and daughter will be here till we move. That’s both good and bad, I guess. I mean, they have no rowdy kids/dogs, but I still have to deal with their doors. I guess I just gotta deal with something no matter where I am. I just don’t understand God’s obsession with me having to live with people. And so damn many of them, too. Having an average of 3 roommates for the two years I was at Valleyhead should’ve been enough of a sign telling me that that’s what I’d be in for, for the most part, though back then I slept just fine with all the shit they had me doped up on. It was getting up in the mornings that was hard.

Anyway, the only thing I heard from her yesterday after the outburst from the dogs was her washer/dryer. She must’ve been drying something heavy because I could hear it clunking away.

Today I noticed before 6 AM that her van wasn’t there and thought – great! No morning banging. But then I saw a dark blue pickup and heard her talking to someone in the utility area, along with some bangs. About an hour later the truck left. I’m guessing she parked in the garage to make room for it, though she could’ve slipped out, came back in the pickup, then left in the pickup, planning to take her van back.

I like being on nights as much as I like being on days. Days keep me from being woken up, but nights are so peaceful around here. Even more so than Maricopa was.

Monday, May 16, 2005

If every day could be like yesterday for as long as we’re stuck here, then it wouldn’t be so bad. It’d take a lot of stress off of me. Patty was quiet all weekend, save for 1 backyard bark and some in front while she was cleaning her van, which she’s parking in her garage more often. I’d rather 100 barks in front than 1 in back because of how the bedroom’s in back where I spend most of my time.

It was dark and rainy all day yesterday. Not even a peep out of next door was heard. We’ve been having a lot of rain and clouds. The kinds the locals hate.

If you asked who I think is better, Bev or Patty, I’d agree with Tom and say they’re about equal. It’s the fucking dog that keeps Patty from winning over Bev. Patty’s definitely more of a weekday/morning person. There were visitors, banging and barking this morning. A dark blue pickup, which I saw last Friday along with a maroon one, was here for about an hour. I don’t know if it was a friend, a nurse, the housekeeper or what, but I wish she’d quit leaving the dog unattended in back when she has company. Normally, she stays by the door and is ready to let it in before it gets the chance to bark at the door, but when she has company, she gets distracted. It was only a couple of barks which I wouldn’t mind at all if I were always on days, but I’m not. I’m going to have to live with other people’s dogs for as long as I live, so I better get used to it. The banging wasn’t anything like the kids, so that’s good, but still, I want to bust us out of here like YESTERDAY! I know Sacramento will be just as noisy, if not noisier, but it’ll be warmer!

What I don’t get is why she would knock on the door to apologize for the barking, just to be allowing it to happen over again a few days later. Gee, what a hypocrite!

We walked up to the grocery store on Saturday. We also checked out a couple of video stores to see if they had season two of Charlie’s Angels, but they didn’t. I guess we’ll have Walmart order it for us. The less we have to get by mail, the better.

We also stopped in a store that sells tons of beads and fragrance oils, along with Indian and hunting-related stuff. This red fox fur they had for $75 was way nice. I especially liked the tail.

The best news of all is that I got the oils on Saturday! Bob’s never been that fast. The 6 trial scents have yielded 2 fantastics, 3 so-so’s, and 1 bust. The Hugo Boss and Magnolia are nothing like Bob’s. The Angel is, but it’s like the newer one. The Caramel’s just ok, but the Pecan Pie and Jasmine are fabulous! So the plan is to get the Charlie’s Angels DVDs next month, then more oils a couple of months after that.

We also “shook up the earthquake” in my book yesterday and made it more intense, but when we’ll ever get it submitted, I don’t know. I still get the feeling he’s stalling for time.

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Again with the morning company and barking. The dog only barked once, but once is all it takes to wake me up, depending on how deep of a sleep I’m in and what ear I’m laying on, so rather than struggle to stay on days, I think I’ll use earplugs when I’m sleeping during the daytime.

The company stayed for an hour, maybe a little more. And I was just about to praise her for not having much company, but just like Bev, she seems to have it a few times a week. As long as 6 little kids don’t go stomping around over there, we’ll be ok.

I’m getting pretty convinced that Mary’s lack of letters is because she can’t get anything out of me, so I’m going to stop the letters permanently unless I hear from her.

A couple came and mowed us down. I was wondering when they were going to mow. The grass was getting pretty tall.

We’ve revised our moving plans again. Neither of us wants to live with Patty, Freckles and next door, no matter how quiet they may be overall, for another 16 months, so we’re going to give notice in either September or October. Our first goal is to try to bust out of this state this year, which would mean we’d leave here at the 1-year marker of moving into this duplex. If it doesn’t look like we can get out this year, and I have my doubts, we’ll move into a house around here a month earlier. The reason we don’t want to move now is that the rates are cheaper in the winter. Plus, we want to save money to get out of having to have a lease. Money makes them go away, and in that case, we wouldn’t be losing any because we’d get the deposit back. We think we can have a grand saved up by then, which would be enough for a deposit, on top of first/last month.

For me, desperation or rage is often the key to my success with things like weight loss. However, as an adult who doesn’t care what others think, I’ve had a hard time motivating myself to lose weight, as opposed to when I was a child with a mother taunting me all the time. Well, while the desire to get out of here may not be as bad as it was in the NHA, PHX or jail, it’s high enough. Therefore, it should motivate me to save money by getting very little food, which should drop me some weight. I’m even determined to save money by toughing my teeth out and putting off the fillings as long as I can. In fact, I’d like to tough it out till I lose the damn teeth. I’m sick of the cavity game. So much so that I’m dead serious about wanting to lose my molars, which is where I mainly get cavities.

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

No barking today, but that may be because she had no company. Meanwhile, if the housekeeper is a weekly thing, she’ll come by tomorrow and bang around while the dog barks outside. I’m trying to keep on days at least throughout Memorial Day. That and Labor Day are the only major holidays we should have left here, and of course, I don’t know when Patty’s birthday is. She could have a party here if her birthday is between now and when we leave. As much as I’d hate to stay an extra month, I wish we could be here for a full year and go straight to California, rather than leave at the 11-month marker and get a house downtown, which is probably the only place we’ll find one since that’s where all the dumps no one wants are. Even if the yard’s flanked by dogs and screaming kids, they at least won’t be able to get this close. I hope not anyway!

I let Tom know that this is it, too. Meaning, I’m not going to keep bumping up our moving dates. We’re out of here come either October or November. Period. I’m not looking forward to another 130-160 days here, but it’s better than forever.

I also let Tom know that I refuse to ever be attached to anyone again, other than in motels! Not even God can keep dragging me back to live with others once we’re out of here. We’re going to hopefully get a place in the heart of Sacramento for two months while we get to know the area, then get a place once we pick out a location. I’m not going to get to know Sacramento in a duplex or an apartment, because I know better. I know that first and last month will turn into a few months, which will turn into a few more, etc.

The cost of living is much higher down there, so we have to make sure we leave with enough money, no matter what he may be collecting from unemployment.

Tom’s finally gotten me to see that yes, we really can move in the truck without having to spend an additional grand on a trailer. This is because we’re going to sell or dump most of our stuff and mainly take the computers, dolls, clothes and hygienic items. We’ll only take a couple of mugs, cups and plates. Not a zillion of each. We can get new things little by little down there. We can downsize our wardrobes and much more. One box fan and one portable heater are enough. We don’t need 3 of each which is exactly what we have right now. One of the large rat cages can go, too.

I gotta bounce to Kate’s DVDs since bouncing to music is boring me lately. It’s discouraging to know you can never lose weight unless you eat so little you feel like you’re starving. That’s just what I’m going to do, though, whether it makes me lose weight or not because I’m bound and determined to get out of here. It may not be to California, but I ain’t staying longer than the 1-year marker in this place. So, whenever I get hungry, I’ll think of Freckles and the banging, even if the banging’s not nearly as bad as the animals were. I doubt I’ll lose weight in the process. I never do. I haven’t lost more than a few pounds in years and all I do is put it right back on when I do. At least it’s been stable.

Here’s a real pisser. Arizona’s now giving free medical to Mexicans. Meanwhile, nothing’s free for us. No, we have to work our asses off and pay for insurance and some of us still can’t get insured even then! Why don’t they just make Arizona a part of Mexico? It is Mexico! Then they go bragging that they just elected the first Hispanic mayor in many years. Why can’t they just elect the damn cock and leave it at that? I’m sick of their reverse-discriminating bullshit! They ought to shut their traps and get over it! All the Americans do is give, give, give, and all the Mexicans do is take, take, take! What’s wrong with this picture? The world’s fucked up!

I “swept” for 6 hours! If all this work doesn’t pay off in a few months, even I’ll be surprised, and I’m as pessimistic as you can get!

Thursday, May 19, 2005

Last night was when I learned that Patty can be just as hypocritical as Bev was. The dog went on a barking fit at 7:30. It was only for a minute, but it was highly annoying and distracting since I was on a roll with my writing. This morning, however, wasn’t as bad as I thought it’d be. I saw the dog, but it didn’t bark. She had that maroon pickup there, as well as a dark blue car I’ve never seen before. As usual, the company was gone and all was quiet by 11:00. They didn’t bang around too much.

The dog seems to be let out an average of 3 times a day, though not on any particular schedule. Perhaps we’ll get a dog in Sacramento. I figure that if I’m going to have to listen to barking, it might as well be our own.

The day we give notice will be the last day I’ll worry about keeping my music for my ears only.

The good news is that I don’t “see” a house here any more than I ever saw a washer, which Tom now says he doesn’t want to get, because he wants to exercise on the weekends, too. As he said, he doesn’t want to struggle on Mondays because he lazed out over the weekends. I still don’t see how we can bust out of this state this year, but if I’m right, then something’s got to break. His computer programs won’t be ready this year, I couldn’t make shit off my book if it got accepted, so that leaves the sweepstakes or a lottery ticket, for sadly the queen ain’t going belly-up for 4-5 more years. That’ll mean about 15 years of being her perfect daughter’s daughter – hee, hee! I think if Miss Perfect could ever have anticipated her hanging on this long, she’d have had second thoughts about taking the selfish bitch in for sure.

I forgot to mention getting a letter from Paula last week. She’s going through one Puerto Rican loser after another, as usual. She said I was nice to her and that I could send her whatever incense I wanted to send her and that she may send money after her birthday for me to get her some. I’m sending some along with a couple of CDs for her birthday, then if she sends money, I’ll have Tom grab some from Jan. She’s not too far off his bike route.

Friday, May 20, 2005

I haven’t heard any outside barking for a couple of days now, though I’ve seen the dog. We decided that if the dog becomes an issue, though we doubt it will, we’ll kill it. A poisoned piece of meat tossed out in the middle of the night should do the trick.

A gray SUV visited yesterday and that blue car was back again today.

With the exception of when Bev had the animals over, I don’t know if I can say this one is better than she was. She has the dog, she has company nearly every day, and she’s constantly out back, even if it’s mostly just to let the dog in and out. Before bed, she turns the patio light on for a while too, as she lets the dog do its last shit of the day.

Of all the rodents I’ve ever had, none have been as clingy as this rat is. It’s a good thing he can’t scream like a guinea pig because he’d never shut up.

I’m now quite convinced that yes, Mary only responded to my letter so she could try to use me to connect her and her dumb boyfriend, and that no, I’m not going to hear from her again. She probably figures that now is a good time to give me what I gave her for 8 months which is silence. Only she’ll probably remain forever silent. No prob. All she does is use people, so it’s okay.

Saturday, May 21, 2005

Tom and I took our walk up to the grocery store, then came back and were playing with the rat when I noticed the webs and spider mites on the big palm that’s been slowly dying ever since I got it, so Tom put it in the garage.

Although the ground flowers are still in bloom all over the place, the cherry and apple blossoms are withering away.

I had yet another great story idea, but I’ve been so busy sweeping that I don’t know when I’ll get back to my writing. I’ve been making zillions of entries on the unlimited-entry contests I’d like to win. One’s for an iPod, two are certificates for clothing/accessory stores, one’s for an indoor cactus arrangement, and another’s for a DJ machine we can sell if we win.

Anyway, the story idea is to have some chick get in trouble for some petty crime in a place where they’re doing this “new experiment” which is to place inmates in the homes of cops, guards, POs, etc., rather than jails. The chick will have to wear an electronic anklet whenever the cop she’s been placed with isn’t home. I figured the chick and cop could fight for a while before they eventually fall in love. Tom said my characters fall in love too quickly anyway, so I’ll slow it down with some conflict beforehand.

Patty took off with some chick in a dark gray van. I think they even took the dog with them, which is customary here. Everyone takes their dogs out with them. I’m surprised they don’t take them to work!

Monday, May 23, 2005

We’ve been hitting the 70s lately. For the last few days, the heater’s been off in the bedroom for half the day. It got up to 79º in here. The warmer weather’s stirring up mom and daughter a little bit, but not nearly as much as I thought it would.

As usual, Patty was quiet over the weekend, but today she had her usual slew of weekday company which meant that the dog had to go outside and on a 20-second barking spree. I saw the driver of the maroon pickup. It’s a young fat chick that looks like it could be Patty’s daughter, though she never did mention having family. If she does, I’m sure I’ll be forced to meet them on Memorial Day.

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

I read that a bunch of bigots filed a lawsuit against a school whose sex-ed department not only showed a film of a woman using a cucumber to demonstrate the proper way to put on a rubber, but that taught that gayness is a biological trait, which is true, and demanded that they teach students that same-sex attractions can be “overcome.”

That’s quite a world we live in when you can sue someone for teaching acceptance and tolerance and make them teach bigotry instead and stuff that’s simply not true. One can’t “overcome” gayness or straightness anymore than one could overcome their heights and I wonder how many more years it’s going to take this world to realize that. If I could quit being attracted to women at will, then a straight woman could quit being attracted to men at the snap of her fingers, too. When that happens, then I’ll believe we aren’t born one way or the other and that it’s a choice or a learned trait.

We’re in the process of figuring out how to convert all the little files a DVD makes to one big file so I can store as many Charlie’s Angels episodes as there’s room for on my hard drive.

Wednesday, May 25, 2005

It’s to be in the 80s today. Next door’s already sitting outside gabbing. If this were Arizona they’d be in front! Nah, God would make them an exception and send them in back with me. This is what I figured they’d do once it warmed up. At least it’s just talking. There’s no music, banging or screaming, though I’m sure they’ll be there all day. They’re not always right outside, but right by their open doors and windows. Unfortunately, their bedroom and bath aren’t in back. Their kitchen and living room are. They’re lucky next door’s not empty or else they’d have gotten bassed to hell a little while ago. I’m sure they heard me singing, but oh well. Speaking of bass, the warmth is enhancing the stereos now that people are driving with their windows down. These things have two speakers. The one inside for those inside the car, and the one in the truck that’s meant to annoy anyone they drive by. I still can’t believe there are people out there so desperate for attention that they’d spend hundreds of dollars on a stereo like that, but that’s just our competitive and pushy society for you.

I’m so sick of this home-all-the-time trend I’ve been living with since ’93! But when you live where everyone’s either retired or disabled, that’s what you get. I just hope it rains like hell on Memorial Day! It just may do that too, according to the weather site, and it may also drop down to the upper 50s. That wouldn’t necessarily stop them from partying as opposed to it being cold and snowy, but we’ll see.

I wish we’d skipped Maricopa and Oregon altogether and just gone straight from Phoenix to California. I just didn’t think we could afford to live in areas of the state that weren’t so crowded. If we’d gone straight there, then I probably would’ve gotten out of having to go to jail and I definitely would’ve gotten out of having to play motel so much and now be stuck crammed in here with these people, old and white or not. I’m sure, though, that God had a hand in guiding us in the wrong direction just so I would have to be stuck living with so many damn people along the way. There’s just no escaping them! I’m never going to get to live in peace and seclusion. I guess Tom and I wouldn’t have spent so many years in cities if we weren’t meant to be in them. At least we can walk to stores and things like that.

Later…

The dog was just barking frantically at next door and their cat. They’re going to live out there till the fall! Anyway, I appreciated how she came and coaxed the dog away as soon as it went off, but still, can’t she leash it down by her door if she’s going to have it out there for more than a few minutes?

When I again mentioned poisoning it to Tom, I just got the runaround, but I’m not surprised. I knew he’d never do it. I just hate it when he agrees to things he knows he won’t do!

They’re talking about overtime where he works, but if he’ll really get any, who knows? That sure would be nice and we sure could use the extra money. Because of that, I have my doubts. It seems that the less you need money, the more it’s available. They’re hiring now, too. Especially since the husband-stabber is going to prison for drugs, and someone else is going to do time, too.

It’s over 85º in here. Quite like Arizona! I love it. I missed the heat more than I realized. It’s nice not having to wear socks or gloves. No more frozen hands or nose tips. No having to sleep with shirts on either. In another week or two, we should be able to turn the heaters off till late September. That’ll save us big time. The heat may not come on tonight at least in the bedroom as it is, and if it does, it shouldn’t be till close to dawn. Being in a real building really helps as I know that if I were in that RV right now, it’d be freezing not long after dark.

I went from 130 pounds to 126, but that’s no surprise. That much is easy. I realize, though, that what was tripping me up in the past was that I was replacing what I’d lose over the week on the weekends. It takes me a week to lose a few pounds, but it only takes a day or two to put them back on. Well, I was pretty much just going around in circles. I still don’t think I’ll lose a significant amount of weight, but I’ll definitely make sure I limit my weekend treats. Especially since getting carried away only makes it hard to jump back on track anyway.

The tree blossoms have withered away, but along part of the back wall of the place are these big bright orange-red flowers. They’re quite lovely.

Thursday, May 26, 2005

Just as I was thinking we ought to kill next door’s cat since that seems to be what mostly stirs up the dog and since it’d be easier to kill a cat than a 45-pound dog, I hear her come out and make her cat calls. She’s also taken to leaving her door open around this time too, so I said to myself, ok, lady, now it’s time to hear me. And the timing was perfect too, because Patty was leaving. So I cranked up the tunes, and sure enough, she closed the door. Yeah, it sucks to be annoyed by neighbors, doesn’t it, Crystal? Oh well. At least they’re still quite tame compared to past neighbors. Still, it was funny to have annoyed her for a change. Why would you want to open doors in the first place and let all the bugs inside? What’s wrong with the windows? Anyway, I won’t annoy anyone too often till we’ve officially given notice. They complain here, and while it may not get us evicted (it didn’t get the last people in here evicted), it could hinder us from renting elsewhere, so I won’t overdo it.

It’s to be around 80º today, 90º in Sacramento and 100º in Maricopa. At least for once, we’ve got the best temp of them all. 80º is perfect. I don’t think my heater went on at all late last night or early in the morning. After all, I got it up to 85º in here by 7:50 when the sun drops down behind next door’s roof.

I have the back and front doors open, but the screens are latched. I’m not afraid to take on any would-be intruders, not that that’s likely in a place like this, but I wouldn’t want them sneaking up on me before I had a chance to do anything about it, but you have to be really, really asking for it to go breaking into people’s houses on such a busy street like this. Some do want to go to jail, though, not that God would allow anyone that messed with us to pay for it since He would only protect their identity, but still, there are some sickos who will stop at nothing.

Later…

This weekend, we’re submitting No Escape. Right now I’m working on Traces of Hope. I’m on a roll with it, though it won’t be very long or as good as No Escape.

It’s still pretty warm, and not surprisingly, next door’s outside gabbing, even though it’s dark now. Fortunately, I can’t hear their chatter in the bedroom with either music playing or the fan on low. Tomorrow I’m going to drown them out with something from the get-go. I know they’ll be outside all the time now, so why wait for them to distract me and interrupt my train of thought while I’m working on my stories or sweeping? In August they’ll probably be out at night only, so I kind of wish we could jump up to that month. We’d not only be a couple of months closer to moving, but as uncomfortable as it may be in August, it may drive them inside more. Then again, maybe not. Heat doesn’t seem to drive people indoors the way cold does. Oh well. In just 4-5 months they’ll be just a memory (I hope), then we can deal with whatever noise we may move next to. At least it couldn’t get this close to us, whatever it is! And I thought the freeloaders were so close! I still don’t see how we could move this fall, even though I still don’t see a house here in Oregon either. Maybe the old white house with dark trim by train tracks that I saw a while back is really down in Sacramento.

Another reason I don’t see us moving this fall is because of what he just found out about unemployment. Each quarter, he’d receive more money. Right now, if they laid him off he’d get $98 a week. Fortunately, they like him at work because that ain’t shit. In August he’d get a little over $100. In October he’d get a little under $200. But come fall of next year he’d get more than he’s taking home now which is barely a grand a month.

According to what I read online, many places are putting bans on these outrageous car stereos we’ve been cursed with for the last 12 years, but they really aren’t doing any good because noise violations aren’t easy to enforce. What they need to do is stop selling the damn things in the first place and make them illegal to have, but that’s just our stupid society for you. All they have to do to really curb the problem is ban the damn things.

By 4:00 this afternoon, I realized it would get well into the 90s in here if I didn’t shut the blinds and drop the blanket I’m using as a drape. It’s still pretty warm in here in the mid-80s. It’s to be in the mid-80s tomorrow, a little warmer than today, so I may not open anything. At least not the blinds. I’d say the heater is definitely not coming on tonight! I missed the summer and I love the money it’s saving. I just wish next door would hang in front like they do in Arizona!

Saturday, May 28, 2005

Yesterday was cloudy but gorgeous. I saw Patty. She was pulling out as I was pulling the dumpster in. She waved to me.

Next door’s been quieter today.

We submitted my story No Escape. It came out to have 57518 words. If it doesn’t make it, I’m not going to submit anymore. At least not for a very long time. Also, if it doesn’t make it, I’ll at least not have to worry about being so perfect with my writing, and I can then use all the racial slurs I want. Even the names of celebrities.

I also finished Traces of Hope. Finally. I’m proofreading it now.

I decided to give the sweepstakes until we move out of this duplex. Even I’d be surprised if I didn’t win at least some kind of small prize between now and then, as pessimistic as I am. I mean, you’re talking hundreds of entries a day!

Tom got the bird-chirping wall clock to work again which had failed to work once we got to Maricopa. Maybe some of the evil that dwelled there had a hand in that. Our shit broke in Phoenix too, but not nearly as much as it did in Maricopa.

Not much happened today. Tom said he heard a few minor bangs from next door, but that’s it. It rained and was cloudy, so maybe that had a part in it. After not having to run the heat for two days, I may have to run it late tonight.

Sunday, May 29, 2005

Today was 10º too cool, so tonight, just like last night, the heater will need to be on. At least it kept things quiet around here. I don’t even have bad vibes about tomorrow, but we’ll see. Either way, we’re going to walk to the grocery store in the late afternoon or early evening.

The first week of dieting has lost 4 pounds. I don’t think I’ll lose any more without dropping my calories to 1000 or lower after I’ve been having about 1100-1300, but I also don’t think I can do that.

Tom has been burning floppy disks onto CDs. You can fit around 500 onto a CD. Then he’s going to ditch most of the floppies. It’s all in preparation to fit our stuff into just the truck alone for when we get out of this state. He thinks that if we leave at 8 AM, we can hit Redding by 11:00, then Sacramento by 3 PM. But when??? This year? Next?

Monday, May 30, 2005

There are no parties going on right now, though Patty let the dog annoy me earlier. It barked twice to be let in, making me want to shake Patty and say, “Stop leaving the damn dog out back unattended!” I wish dogs could be litter box trained like cats. Better yet, I wish they weren’t so damn loud! As I said, if I’m going to be forced to listen to barking no matter where we go, we may as well get our own dog once we get settled down in Sacramento. At least down there, I could leave it outside during the daytime when I happen to be asleep to bark with all the others and know no one’s going to complain.

She’s taken to hanging things out, too. Mostly big things like sheets and blankets.

We took our walk earlier and got $13 worth of groceries for just $6, thanks to the girl that fucked up for the better for us. It’s nice when people fuck up for the better! It was slightly warm for walking, but not too bad. We may walk to the Chinese place next weekend or order a pizza, depending on my schedule, because as Tom said, we deserve a treat. I agree, so long as it doesn’t screw us out of getting out of here. We are giving notice come September or October at the latest. What’s weird, though, is that walking has been causing me to get cramps in my hips. They walked us to death in Valleyhead yet I never got shit. I know I’m older now, but Tom’s even older and he doesn’t get that.

The summer hours at work start this week, which means he’ll be going to work and coming home an hour earlier.

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thecandywrites · 2 years ago

Text

Monster March Day 31- Satyr- Part 1

Sheepishly Mine- Part 1- Spunky

At long last. It is here. My last offering for Monster March. Three months later- in June. But hopefully it was worth the wait.

As always, thank you, thank you, thank you to @borealwrites for their Monster March 2023 Prompt list. I'm sorry it's taken me- I shit you not- six whole months to do 31 stories because I started all the way back in January. And while a shit ton of crap happened, I was able to perservere. even if I feel like this at the end.

But we did it! We made it to the end. Also, I want to say, this was inspired by Sandi Brock and her channel Sheepishly Me. She is a sheep farmer in Canada and is phenomenal and is so honest about what it's like to have a farm. Especially an animal one, where ideally, in a perfect world, each ewe has two perfectly healthy lambs and are born on time and don't have any health problems and whose mom didn't have pregtox and has plenty of milk and loves both of her babies.

But that's not real life. And I adore Sandi for showing the good, the bad and the ugly and even the heart breaking days where lambs unfortunately die before they ever get to be born. And she does, absolutely everything she can, going above and beyond for her sheep and does what she can to help the mamas and the lambs and she even bought a wheelchair for one even. And she has her Golden Girls (go Billy's Mom, also Tomatoes was totally the inspiration for Spunky) her older, retired ewes that she puts on a seperate farm to live out the rest of their days in a big, green pasture with super comfy bedding and even grain and corn and gives them pets and scritches. And when I saw this prompt list, I immediately wrote- Sheepishly Me! next to the prompt. this was one that I knew exactly what I wanted right when I saw the prompt six months ago.

And while that provided the beautiful wholesome start for this, you can obviously guess where this will eventually go. Because, I am, a Lemon Flavored Factory. But that's not until Part 3. Also, for my Star Trek fans, yes, that is Conner Trinneer. Who played Trip in Star Trek and Jolene Blalock who played T'pol. The Authorities may have canceled the series but my love for the Trip/T'pol ship will forever burn because the show did them dirty and they deserve better. And when I named my lead guy Trip, my brain automatically assigned Trip from Star Trek Enterprise which ran from 2001-2005 that had Scott Bakula as Captain Archer. And Trip, being that perfect Southern Gentleman from Georgia and his voice- Heaven help me was just so soothing. And fit perfectly for the mood I was going for. So think of this is as something of fanfic for that too.

So, enjoy.

Monster March Day 31- Satyr

Sheepishly Mine

Spunky

Trip loaded up the last of the January lambing market lambs into the trailer and drove down to the auction house before he saw a new face going from pen to pen, petting the lambs as she went, as she seemed to be looking for something in particular among the sheep. Occassionally stopping to talk to the owner of the sheep in said pen if they were standing by and making notes in a notebook as she went.

“Who’s that?” Trip asked Ruth, one of the other older sheep farmers who had come to do the same as him today, sell off the last of their market lambs from the last lambing before the spring lambing would start as the beautiful woman in question neared the pens he had loaded his market lambs into, one of the ewes and one for the young rams.

“Probably some Lookie Lou.” Ruth waived off before she took another sip of her coffee and went around to see who else brought what into the auction barn today.

But soon, the young woman came to his pen and smiled when all the lambs came up to her to sniff her hand and get pets.

“Aww, aren’t you adorable?” She cooed and Trip nearly fell over- he swooned so hard.

“Are these your sheep?” She asked him as she looked over at him as he watched her intently interacting with the lambs.

“Yes Ma’am.” He confirmed.

“Did you name any of these?” She asked as she gestured to the lambs in question.

“Well, actually, I did name a few, this one is Spunky…” He admitted before he pointed out which ones he had named. And then before he knew it he had practically told her about how he had helped deliver them, who their mother’s names were, if they were a hard pull, if their mom had any issues like pregnancy toxemia and things like that. And how most of them had been bottle babies because their mothers couldn’t handle to have more than two to three lambs per ewe and how many of the mamas had given birth to quads this time, which was why they were so small and took so long to get up to market size.

“So I see a few pretty small little runts here.” She noted before he had to admit that they had been preemie and bottle babies and had issues with thriving and had to have a lot of tender loving care to live, let alone make it to this point, thus the names.

“How much were you wanting for them?” She asked.

“Oh, um, just..fair market value.” He answered.

“Ok. Can I buy them now or do you want to put them in the ring to see if they’ll get a higher price?” She asked.

“Oh, well, what were you wanting them for?” He couldn’t help but ask.

“I’m starting a hobby farm. I'm trying to turn it into more of a homestead and subsistence farm. I’m specifically looking for glorified lawn mowers and decent wool producers. I already have a couple that I’ve specifically gotten just for wool production so I can make my yarn goods and supplies and stuff and I already have a few alpacas for that purpose too." She began as Trip blinked in surprise but couldn't help but smile in delight to hear it.

"And I’ve gotten a guard llama, who came with the alpacas, among other things, who is very, very good at what she does. But I planted a small orchard on my farm as well as a few groves of blueberry bushes and things and I’m needing weed and grass control between the trees and between the vines on the vineyard portion of the farm. I got two goats, but they have a habit of climbing the trees and bushes themselves to eat the foliage and fruits and just about stripped a few of my good trees bare as well as the bushes too. I was looking for something to keep their hooves, mostly on the ground. And your runts would be perfect for such a thing." She explained.

"I know they won’t fetch as high a price as some of your bigger market lambs would, even as sweet as they are, but what I have now is too much for the animals I have to keep up with- without sacrificing the trees and bushes themselves.” She explained and Trip was ready to get on one knee and propose right then and there as all the ewes in the pen tried to climb over the gate to get pets and hugs from her as it was clear those lambs had practically instantly fallen in love with her.

“Take as many as you want and any that you want.” He urged her.

“For how much per sheep?” She asked.

“Whatever you can pay or want to pay. It would take twenty dollars an hour to hire someone to mow your lawn. And they’ll be needing that much more care and attention than the service you would be needing them for. But they like you, and if you can save them from the butcher’s block, then I’ll happily let them just move to their new forever home.” He offered.

“But I only brought $200 dollars with me. I was only going to be able to buy one or two lambs, depending on how big they were. But I really want Spunky most of all.” She said as she practically hugged said lamb who soaked up her love happily.

“Well, that two hundred dollars can buy you the whole pen of ewes if you want them. With the ewes, you don’t have to worry about them fighting like the rams can. And with no sires, you don’t have to worry about them lambing or anything. Just sheer them like you do your other sheep and alpacas and they’ll happily do what you want them to and the cross in them will give you decent wool too because they're Corriedales, which are one of the standard dual purpose breeds. And they still have thier first virgin fleece on them so you'll get the best wool they can give you.” He urged her.

“But this pen easily has over a thousand dollars worth of lambs in it! This is how you make your living and care for your family. I couldn’t possibly do that to you. Really, if I could only buy the three runts I would be happy with that. Even though they are all just, the most darling…” She tried to argue but the lambs were already trying to find ways to get out of the pen just to get to her.

“Nah, this is just my left overs from my January lambing before my next lambing group lambs and then once they've weaned, they get to move into the lamb barn themselves. I didn’t have a whole lot of hopes for this group anyway. And honestly, you're probably the best buyer possible for them. Heck, you don't even have to give me that whole $200, even $20 would be enough for the pen, since they're just going to be mowing the lawn anyway.” He waived off.

“But wouldn’t your wife…” She began to try to argue.

“Ma’am, I don’t have a missus, nor children, it’s just me and the sheep on the farm. So there is no one back home to get angry about what I do with my own sheep. You want them, they want you, it’s a done deal in my book. And it sounds like you have more than enough grounds to keep them well fed through the spring and summer and as long as you can get the hay and feed in the winter and they won’t be a burden to you to keep- they're yours. You’ll just have wool coming out of your ears come shearing time.” He offered.

“Ok fine, you drive a hard bargain mister. Let me bring my truck and trailer around to this spot and I’ll load them up and give you what I can for them, but they are obviously worth more than $20. Please let me pay at least that $200.” She offered before she tried to gently push the sheep back into the pen and say she needed to leave for a quick second but would be right back.

“Well you drive a hard bargin Miss, but deal.” Trip offered her his hand to shake.

“Thank you Mr…?” She shook his hand firmly.

“Trip O’Donnel at your service Ma'am.” He offered as he shook her hand.

“Jolene- Marie Burke, friends just call me Marie.” She introduced herself before she got into her purse and handed him all the money she had on her, which amounted to $223.45 but he refused to accept anything more from her once she tried to pull out her checkbook. Before he put sold on the lot just before the meat buyers came to look at the ram pen anyway.

Trip noticed Jolene-Marie got her phone out and began recording herself as she giddily and hurriedly walked out of the auction house to get her truck with it’s horse trailer and it’s bail of hay already in it before she drove it around where his pen was where he had parked nearby after unloading them.

And thanks to Trip helping her back it up, she was able to back her trailer into the pen before he helped her load them up into her trailer, with some grain as an incentive as they were all happy to get in and lay down in the soft straw and begin to nibble on the hay and bits of feed corn she had put down on the hay itself.

“Thank you so much Mr. O’Donnel. I um, I have a Youtube channel, it’s called Burke’s Barn. I try to upload at least once a week, so you can watch them finish growing up and any adventures they might have at my farm.” She sheepishly offered.

“I’ll have to check that out.” He nodded before she seemed to be overcome with emotion and hugged him, which he was pleasantly surprised but accepted all the same as whatever she washed her hair and body in smelled so good, like walking through a flower garden.

“Thank you so much for such precious little angels. They’ll be very well cared for and loved.” She promised before she let go and then drove off in the mid morning sun as he quickly looked that up and found her channel on Youtube. It was very much a ‘slice of life’ and encouraging people to not let every farm be a commercial one. But that even if all you had was one pot, you could grow something and grow something you liked and that enriched your life more than money ever could.

And if Trip had swooned before, now he was smitten as he tried to look her up to see if she was married or had any other family but didn’t really see much sign of her being married or in a relationship. But at the same time, he was just a humble sheep farmer, who didn’t have a whole lot to offer someone like her.

But he still subscribed to the channel and after a few days, he got a notification that she uploaded a new video, showing off all the sheep he had sold her.

He sat in his recliner, trying to fight off sleep as he watched as she did her health inspections and went ahead and named any who didn’t have names and began to practice good husbandry skills with them. He was nearly crying when she showed herself walking backwards, through her little orchard and letting the sheep munch as they went, cooing to them and encouraging them as she went and called everyone back to the barn when it got to be really hot so they could cool down in the shade of the barn and chew their cud while she finished with her other chores for the day. She was just too cute, and too beautiful and too precious and adorable.

She talked about the benefits that the manure would do and how it would really help with the farm’s needs as a whole. And how now, it was more or less complete, even though she seemed keen on finding new ways to improve it. And then- named him by name as the super sweet, wonderful sheep farmer who sold her the sheep and how all of his sheep were super sweet, very well behaved, and were personable and tame and even handleable, and in excellent health. And that it was clear that he had been an excellent sheep farmer and still treated his animals with care and dignity and not just some living cash crop to make a buck off of.

After that, suddenly he had people coming in from all over, just to buy his sheep. He had no idea that the market to get glorified lawn mowers was so big. But Joleane-Marie had quite the following of other people who were getting into farming as a new kind of eco friendly, self sufficient lifestyle and any money he had potentially “lost” when he first sold that pen of sheep, he made back- ten fold with the others.

And he, for the first time felt like being in the family farm- sheep business was paying off. His new customers all practically gushed at him about Jolene-Marie, or just- Marie, rather. How inspiring she was and how honest and forthcoming she was about all aspects of farm life. Including the not so fun bits about putting animals down, when they were sick and beyond saving and suffering. Or how you needed to put a lot of planning and work in- if you were going to live that kind of lifestyle. And how, just one pest, or one disease can devastate your food supply and how hard it was to keep a balance. And how Jolene- Marie had already lost so many good potential partners in life because of her passion for farming. And that was when Trip knew he had to at least take a shot and at least write to the post office box she received gifts to.

‘Hello Miss Jolene- Marie Burke, this is Trip O’Donnel, the sheep farmer that sold you…” He began to list off all the sheep he had sold her, and which ones he had watched her name on the video. He felt awkward though, trying to cold write to her and ask her out on a date. So instead, he offered that should she ever want any advice or more help with the sheep, that he was available and wrote down his address so that she could come see him, if she wanted to. He had to take forever to write it in his best penmanship so that she could at least try to read it, even though he felt like his own nerves made the words a bit wiggly. But he tried. And wondered how long it would take before she would even get to see it, let alone be able to read it. Knowing she probably had a mountain of fanmail she probably got on a daily basis.

What he didn’t expect was a letter back two days later.

Not only had she gotten his note, she was touched by his generosity and was still, so grateful for the sheep and invited him to her farm so she could get some feedback on how functional her own set up was.

He nearly fainted and jumped so high his head nearly hit the ceiling.

That paper was barely out of the envelope when he was punching in the address to see how far away she lived. And wouldn’t you know it? She lived only in the next town over. Because the rual area they lived in, was one larger "town" that boasted of one of just about all the major chain fast food "restaurants and a Walmart and a Kroger and TSC. And "town" or the largest of the "cities" surrounded by smaller small towns that were lucky to boast of a Dollar General as a local grocery store. Maybe a streetlight or two and a gas station or two. He always called them 'blink' towns. Because if you were driving around and 'blinked' you could miss them. He must have seen her around before and never realized it and was only an agonizing 20 minute drive away.

Suddenly as he pulled up, he realized it was one of his parent's old friends farm. Only the husband had died of a heart attack and had unfortunately gotten a reverse mortgage so the bank took back the house before they could ever fix the old place up, which was something they were supposed to have done 20 years ago, at the very least. He could see her in her garden, planting things from her own greenhouse, covered in dirt, not a speck of makeup and her hair up in a pony tail through her old baseball cap and she could not have been prettier.

Trip just kind of let his truck slow down a crawl, barely aware he was driving in the first place before an Emu up and charged him and his truck before he yelled and slammed on the breaks and slid in the gravel of the driveway before the noise alerted Marie that he was there before a damn herd of dogs came barking and surrounding his truck on all sides. Then a llama came over keeping the sheep and alpacas at a safe distance.

“Barbara Strissand!” Marie barked before she came to his rescue.

“Really Barb? You’re gonna kick his truck? Did you actually dent it and I get to fix that now? Really? I invite a guest and you all gang up on him! Stop, enough, off, off of him!” Marie chastised as she pulled the Emu off of the truck and pushed the bird by the neck backwards.

“This is why I don’t let you out of your pen. But no, you had to go and hunt snakes around the coop and help Lenora hunt for racoons and coyotes. You’re done, you’re going back into the pen.” Marie urged the large bird as she prodded the large bird to a nearby pen, with the help of most of her dogs who helped herd the large bird back into the pen.

“Ladies, it’s ok. It was just Barb being a bitch. It’s ok.” Marie tried to coo to the chickens who had taken refuge under what they could when they heard Barb hiss and kick at the truck.

“I’m really sorry about Barb, Trip. Let me see what she did to your truck.” Marie tried to say as she came back to his truck to see which dents in the side, her bird had been responsible for.

“It’s an old truck door. I’ve dinged the door more at the gas station myself more than she could ever try to ding it.” Trip tried to waive off and stood on the other side of the door to keep her from seeing the sad state of the old truck anyway.

“It’s ok, you’re not responsible for anything, it’s ok. I’m here for the sheep and I can already see from here that they’re doing just fine.” Trip said he gently turned her to face the sheep who recognized him and were starting to jump and bound over to him.

“There’s the lucky girls!�� Trip cooed to them as he took a few steps and met them half way and started petting them affectionately once Marie still looked at the truck door and took a quick picture before she joined them.

“The heat of the summer decided to come a little late this year, so I just got done shearing them the day before yesterday. They probably look awful. I’m still pretty new at the shearing thing too so they were pretty uneven when I first tried and I had to go over them again to try to even them out.” She offered.

“Oh, well they look fantastic. I never would have known if you hadn’t told me.” Trip waived off as he began to scratch each one between the shoulder blades as the sheep began to wiggle their lips, ears and tails in delight.

“And they’re obviously very well fed too. Look how they’ve grown!” He beamed happily to see each one already pretty plump but building strong muscle from being outside and getting exercise.

“Growing just as fast as my weeds.” Marie tried to chuckle.

“Because spring decided to come so late and we just kept having frost after frost before the weather decided to skip spring and jump from winter into summer, I feel like I’m so behind on everything.” Marie admitted.

“Well what do you need help catching up on?” Trip asked before Marie felt like she was speed talking as she listed it all off.

“Well, I got my chores done already this morning, let me help you with yours.” He offered.

“No, I just wanted your opinion on a few things…” She tried to shake her head no.

“Oh nonsense. This is quite the set up, it would usually take a family of at least six to do everything you’re trying to do.” He waived off.

“Are you sure? I feel like I would just be taking advantage of you again.” Marie winced.

“Nonsense. You’re the last kind of person who looks to take advantage of anyone. You did me a favor by trying to save my favorite girls from the butcher block. But from a business perspective, it wouldn’t make any sense to make them into replacement ewes, for fear all their lambs would be just like they were.” He tried to waive off.

“Yeah, but your time is still valuable and I don’t want to be abusing that or using you for that matter.” Marie tried to contest.

“Miss Jolene-Marie, you tell me what you need and where you need it or I’ll just pick something and start on it on my own.” He lightly teased before she seemed to chuckle and shake her head.

“Ok, you’re gonna be hurting and regretting that but ok.” She finally caved and led him to the green house and directed where she needed what planted on her garden plot as he was quick to dig in with her and practically work shoulder to shoulder as he helped her plant her garden and her other crops.

“Wow, you have some old antique equipment.” He noted as he looked at the old mechanical farming equipment.

“Yeah, old equipment that doesn’t need software updates every year or else it won’t run.” Marie answered and that seemed to be a lightbulb moment for Trip as he took that information and blinked a few times to wrap his head around that.

“Planned obsolescence is getting a bit out of hand lately.” Marie noted.

“Yes it is!” He nodded before they began to talk some more about how more and more farms were either going out of business or having to go more commercial to stay afloat. And how the land itself is sprayed and stripped and devoid of any life not artificially planted there. As Trip found himself agreeing with more and more she talked about.

“So how did you get into this?” He asked.

“I grew up really poor in the city. That thanks to WIC and food stamps and all that, that’s how my family survived. And growing up with food scarcity and not knowing where your next meal will come from is quite traumatic for any child. And then I got into a program where kids from my school could volunteer at a horse ranch with other underprivileged kids and especially the special needs kids could have horse therapy. And I fell in love with it. Then from there, I worked detasseling corn on a commercial farm and I got to see first hand how fewer and fewer farmers were still in the business and had to change to commercial farming if they wanted to keep the family farm in the first place. And then from there, I worked on all the other kinds of farms that they would hire me on, mucking out stalls and picking fruit and caring for other people’s farms and watched how if an animal wasn’t immediately able to make money off of, they would just kill it to keep it from being a leech on precious resources and that’s where I’ve gotten just about all the animals on my farm. The Emu though, I hatched her from an egg. Heck, all of my quail, I hatched from eggs in farmers markets and most of my chickens were little hatchlings who were going to be culled and thrown away. And then I got to make some friends in the cooking community and how there’s this huge push for more farm to table places. So most of what I grow that doesn’t feed myself, I can sell to the chefs who want to use it in their restaurants. And then when the last housing market crash, I was able to afford to buy this place with my life savings. And thanks to Youtube and my subscribers and add revenue and all that, it’s how I can afford to live here and afford this simple lifestyle. Granted it means I have very few private things in my life. But it’s how I’ve managed to survive. And while things are tight now and I’m still learning and still getting the hang of…all of it. There are days when it sucks and mother nature is cruel, and other days it’s nice and she’s kind and despite everything, I still manage to keep a roof over my head, the lights on, food in my pantry, clothes on my back, shoes on my feet, mostly thanks to subscribers to the channel and patreon backers and my online for the yarn and soaps and stuff.” Marie explained as she rinsed all the dirt off of her hands and arms from the hose and took her garden shoes off to rinse off her feet before she took a rag and wiped off before she invited him inside to have lunch once they had made quick work of her garden before she made them a simple but delicious lunch. The house was obviously a bit eclectic and very few things matched and lots of things had been upcycled but Trip found he liked it that way.

“I really like what you’ve done with the place.” He motioned around the kitchen table.

“Thanks. Welcome to my ‘there for last chance clearance sale on…everything’ and driving to many- a thrift store.” Marie chuckled as she gestured to her kitchen where nothing matched itself. But the food she had was obviously home grown, humble but incredibly delicious.

“I love the bean soup.” He praised.

“Thanks. It’s my ‘put this in a crock pot overnight so you have food tomorrow and you will have something to eat when you forget to take time to cook and eat anything else cause you’ll be too busy’ kind of meals.” Marie smiled gratefully.

“I really like food like this. Something simple but delicious yet comforting and filling and satisfying, with soul and substance.” Trip added, although he wasn’t sure if he was complimenting the cooking or her as a person. His cheeks darkened and he tried to scoop as much of the soup into his mouth to keep himself from saying anything else that would give away his attraction to her. But he was a satyr, meaning he was always attracted to women, but most usually only thought because he was a satyr, it was almost expected of him. Heck his brothers were living proof of that reputation. And thus, why they were always bouncing from relationship to relationship and drowning in childcare payments. And there was a reason why his parents had chosen him to take over the farm, because he wasn’t like his other brothers and took the farm seriously and would rather get up early and farm and take care of the sheep, than stay out late and party.

But something about Marie, she was such a marvelous, vibrant, passionate and driven woman. And that’s what appealed to her the most.

After the bean soup for lunch, she walked him around the farm, showing him where she had what and how she had it set up and why she did it that way and he was in awe that- for being mostly self taught, she had figured out so much on her own and was beginning to be a Jill of All Trades for how much she was learning how to care for what equipment she had, that with some good upkeep and some good maintenance, could probably outlive them all. She had seemed to find all the really good sweet spot as far as machinery was concerned. Not so old that ordering a new part wouldn’t be impossible. But not new enough that it needed digital electrical equipment. She preferred analog for electronics because digital needed software and near constant software updates. And he felt bad because she already had everything just how he would have it if this was his place. It was all very well planned, organized, executed and she had great follow through with execution of her decisions.

“Well, I’m sorry I can’t be of more help. You already have it all well underway and better organized than even my place is. If anything, you’re giving me ideas of how to improve my place.” He offered once they were done.

“Well, just hearing that is a relief. And knowing I’m not creating a perfect storm of a disaster is a comfort honestly. So that is incredibly helpful. Sounds like you’ve done this for a while and you know the tried and true methods of most things.” She smiled happily.

“Well you’re more than welcome to come to my farm and see for yourself.” He invited.

“I would love that actually.” She smiled happily before he gave her the full address and directions on how to get to his farm from hers. As well as the better feed places that were much, much cheaper than TSC, which she appreciated.

He went home and for hours, cleaned, re-organized what he could, all while the sheep seemed to watch on curiously.

And the next morning, just as he was leaving his house with his thermos of coffee, there she was, pulling up in her truck.

“Well good morning, did you get a good breakfast? I made extra.” He offered as he gestured to his house.

“Oh, I already ate.” She excused.

“It’s biscuits and gravy.” He added before she caved.

“Ok, yes, I would love some biscuits and gravy.” She caved as she came into his house and smiled to see it antiquated but adorable and nearly picturesque. She loved the bright, sunflower yellow walls and the sunflower boarder on the walls. And she adored the antique gas stove and nearly squealed and gasped as she fawned over his cast iron collection. And even the curtains his mother had sewn when he was little and practically gawked at all the family pictures around the house.

“So what are we doing today?” Marie asked.

“Well, we’re going to mix up some feed rations and feed the sheep. And then we’re gonna get them ready for ready for their pre-lambing sheering.” He answered before she joined him as he walked from the house to the barn and was greeted by the bah’s of nearly a thousand ewes in four groups.

“Oh, my, wow.” She blinked in surprise.

“Wow, they look like they’re about to pop.” She noted from the pen of pregnant ewes.

“Well they still have just a couple more weeks. But yeah.” He nodded and for once, it was wonderful to have a helping hand with the ewes as he introduced her before he got into the front loaded and started it up and began to dump various scoops and bags of feed into his feed ration mixer as she simply was content to throw the empty bags from the pellet bags in the garbage as she noticed that- for being a big operation and being such a big barn, it was surprisingly clean and well maintained and even had new modern features which made it easier for just Trip to handle - mostly on his own.

“How do you do this all on your own?” Marie asked.

“Well, not all on my own, in the summer, my nieces and nephews come to help a lot and it’s kind of considered a summer job for them. But in the fall, winter and spring, I usually hire help. But my last assistant went to college this past fall and I just haven’t really gotten a chance to hire a replacement.” He admitted.

“But don’t you have like 9 siblings? Why don’t they help?” Marie asked.

“Because there’s no way any amount of money could ever entice them back into this barn. We grew up doing this with no pay, because our parents demanded it until we were old enough to strike out on our own. And everyone else went to college for anything but farming and moved as far away as possible. So by the time I came along, my parents were desperate and basically had to use the farm itself as a sole inheritance to try to keep us younger siblings here. It only worked on me. And when they got too old to care for themselves, let alone anything else. And they had to go into a nursing home, everyone pushed me to cut bait, sell it all off and split it evenly among us all. But by then, the family will was already written and notarized and I couldn’t change their wishes. So it honestly, put a big wedge between me and the others. And it’s only the kids of my two closest siblings that come to help. The older ones are too far away and swore off farming altogether and moved to big cities and got big city jobs and houses in the suburbs and are content to go to grocery stores and I’m pretty sure their kids just assume meat comes prepackaged in the store, and not off of any other living animal.” He admitted.

“That’s so sad.” Marie frowned.

“In my family, all of us were so poor, we hardly didn’t have anything and what little we did have, we shared. And right now, they’re just happy to get eggs, and, I’m the same way, in the summer, all my nieces and nephews come out but I can’t pay them anything, but they’re just happy to get out of the city and off the streets and away from any dangerous associations that they normally can’t escape while they’re in school. And right now, all my siblings are simply doing everything they can to get them into every other program they can- just to get them out of the public schools and into private ones just to give them any advantage they can and use the summers that the kids are here- to get second and third jobs so they’re working all the time and they’re just happy to get the very foods that my nieces and nephews helped grow and then can and preserve what they can, cause every penny saved is then stretched to max. They consider me to be the lucky one who got out of the cycle and didn’t go into the never ending cycle of working a job that you hate but it’s the best job with the best pay you can get and have to kiss ass to people you despise. And while we all work, probably too hard, at least we have each other and at least we help when we can. But that’s only because no one else in the family has anything the others want or are willing to go to war over.” Marie explained as she watched as the ewes got fed and ate as the barn quieted down quite a bit.

“I’m sure if there was a big and probably pretty valuable asset like this, and the farming equipment alone is worth millions. This farm with all of it’s acreage, that’s millions of dollars in of itself. But you don’t look at the fields and think how much it’s worth, you look at your fields and see what crops you can use said land to produce to feed the sheep. You see them as friends and tools rather than piles of money.” Marie reasoned.

“That’s true, I do. And while I know you’re not wild about commercial farming, I hope you can see that at least for me, it’s not just all cash crops. It’s all for the sheep. Because they’re like my kids, my friends, my purpose. And I love ‘em. They’re funny and spunky and when the lambing is done and you’re just watching all the kids grow up and it’s feeding time, watching all the kids run and jump and bound up and down the pens while the moms are eating. Or when they get into big sleep piles taking naps, then they’re just precious little angels. And then I have a place that’s down the road. I call it the Hill View Retirement Community. All the ewes that I’m particularly attached to, they get to live out their last years over there, just eating and basking in the sun or getting shelter in the barn when the weather is not so nice, they’re my soft spots and my guilty pleasure. And some of these older ewes, once they make it through this lambing, they’ll retire and join them in Hill View. And even though, that hill ain’t much more than a prairie dog hill, it’s still nice for them to walk up and down on.” He shrugged.

“Can we go see them?” Marie asked hopefully.

“Yeah, sure.” He agreed before he invited her to ride with him over to them and introduced them all by name as Marie was giddy to meet a sheep with the same name as her.

“Well hello there Merry Marie.” Marie giggled as she scratched the ewe between the shoulder blades and giggled as the sheep’s lips curled and her ears wiggled and her tail wagged to get the love and attention as Sunsugar nearly butted her head into Marie’s hip to get some pets herself.

“Oh my goodness, you’re green with envy? What, no one can get any pets without you getting some too?” Marie teased the sheep as she used her other hand to scratch the same place between the sheep’s shoulder blades as Trip put down fresh “sheets” aka- straw for bedding down in the area that they bedded down on as Trip damn near sighed dreamily.

“There you are!” His nephews nearly bleated when they got off of school and came home to the house that was across the street as Trip nearly jumped out of his own skin and made the most undignified yelp which caused Marie to come around the corner to see Trip clutching his chest and bracing himself against the wall as his nieces and nephews easily jumped the fence to gather around him before they noticed her.

“Who are you?” They asked when they noticed her.

“Hi, I’m Marie Burke, I just bought some sheep off of your…uncle?” Marie supplied.

“Oh! You’re the super pretty farmer in Damsey! Hi, I’m Billy…” The oldest realized as all the kids immediately left their uncles to come around Marie and introduce themselves and get to meet her and ask her all kinds of questions because apparently, Trip was not the only newest subscribers to her channel, so were they. And they were all eager to see if they could appear in a new video of hers.

“Well, I would have to get permission from your parents.” Marie began.

“Uncle Trip! You can give the permission right? I mean you pick us up from school and can take us to doctor’s appointments and stuff.” They all pleaded with him with their big doe eyes and hopeful smiles.

“No, that’s definitely something your mom and dad are gonna have to give permission for.” Trip shook his head no gently with an apologetic smile.

Before the kids turned back and wanted to know everything about Marie and her farm and then ask about her family and how she had nieces and nephews but no kids herself and then came the question Trip had wanted to ask but couldn’t bring himself to get the courage to as he got the kids back to his farm by having them pile up in the bed of his truck as they all helped him and Marie with his other chores in the barn. And having Marie there with the kids, they were much more eager to do everything she wanted to help with and work alongside her.

“So how come you’re not married with kids of your own?” Billy asked.

“Because I haven’t found anyone who wants to farm the way I do. Or thinks that my way of doing things is impractical in the modern world or only sees animals, land and food as a way to make money, not a way to support and sustain life.” She answered.

“Well then you should date Trip! Because that’s how he farms too!” The kids urged her.

“Oh I should, should I?” She seemed to smile and laugh.

“Unless you don’t like satyrs.” One of the girls, Maddie- sheepishly offered.

“Why wouldn’t I like satyrs? Aren’t you guys normal people, just like everyone else?” Marie posed innocently back.

“We are, just most people don’t see it that way.” Maddie frowned.

“Well, I’m one of those kinds of people who takes everyone as an individual and I don’t always assume that just because of the kind of person they are- will mean what that person is too. Humans are known for their ruthlessness, viciousness, violence and aggression as much as they are known for their humanity, kindness and nurturing. Same could be said about anyone and everyone else. People have always been people, no matter the kind. And so far, what I’ve seen between you guys and your uncle and others that I’ve met since I moved out here, is that while this is a mostly rural community, it’s a very honest, honorable, very hard working and close knit community. But they’re happy with life’s little pleasures and are usually easily contented. That most people are happy to help each other out, even if they appear to be strangers, but are happy to make new friends. And even do what they can to lift each other up instead of pushing each other down just so they get ahead in life because of how competitive they are. And even though I’m the first person and first generation in my family to farm, I feel welcome and among equals when I’m with people who have been doing it all their lives and for countless generations. And are more than ready and willing to share everything they have, including knowledge and know-how and wisdom as they are with a cup of sweet tea and sitting on the front porch while I pick up leftovers from yard sales and barn sales. And then they get to be friends and are happy to share family recipes and little tricks of the trade and are happy to exchange favors for small things up to big things. Like trading planting plants from a greenhouse for the chance to play with big pregnant ewes.” Marie smiled.

“Wait, so you went to her farm? Is it as nice as the videos?” All the kids asked Trip.

“Yup.” Trip nodded as his cheeks darkened again but his little smile was particularly adorable.

And then, before he knew it, his brother and his wife were wandering into the barn, just as Trip got done with what he could in the barn to set up for shearing day the next day.

“Well hello there, I don’t think we’ve met. Ashley O’Donnel, the mother to- all of them.” Ashley said as she reached her hand out towards Marie after she gestured to her kids while she had another toddler on her hip while her pregnant belly swayed with her boho skirt.

“Hi, nice to meet you Ashley, I’m Marie Burke. I bought some lambs off of Trip and was getting to know more about sheep husbandry, and the kids have been fantastic teachers, I’ve learned more from them in an afternoon than I have the last three years of researching.” Marie explained as Ashley nearly blinded Marie with a bright happy smile.

“Really? Which ones did you get?” She asked.

“The stragglers from January.” Trip answered.

“Oh, even the runts?”

“Especially the runts, the runts were what I was after.” Marie answered before Ashley practically squeezed the soul out of Marie with a happy delighted squeal.

“Really? Oh I’m so happy you got Spunky!” She cooed.

“Yeah, Spunky is quite the character, she’s been really fun to have.” Marie smiled.

“Oh, please tell me you can stay for dinner, we are only going to be having a bucket of fried chicken but, I would love to have you stay for dinner. You too Trip.” Ashley warmly invited.

“As long as we wouldn’t be keeping Marie from anything.” Trip offered.

“Nope. Not at all.” Marie shook her head and smiled.

“Perfect!” Ashley beamed and practically pulled Marie into her vehicle while her husband went and got said fried chicken from the local chicken joint.

Over dinner, Ashley was eager to try to welcome Marie into the fold and into the family while Skip gave Trip a few scheming smiles and nudges and looks to show he was all for this new development.

#Monster March #Monster March 2023 #Monster March 2023 Day 31- Satyr #Monster March 2023 Day 31- Part 1

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chirpsythismorning · 2 years ago

Note

Would a potential writers strike actually affect Stranger Thinks production at all? The fact that the actors are all over the place for scheduling (unsurprising, they're all amazingly talented) it's very doubtful they will be filming episodes chronologically. Schedules have to be created from scripts in order to say who would be on set which days so wouldn't that mean all the episodes are written already? They've had since 2020 to work on the episode outlines (the part that takes the longest amount of time). The writing of a script from an outline usually only takes a couple of weeks (per the Duffer Brother's own masterclass lessons). Writers room may only have re-opened SM accounts last year after S4 aired but I imagine this far into the series run, writers room should just be airing out the final kinks with each ep under one/two writer's care.

It’s standard practice to have the writers still writing the final episodes while starting to film the first ones. The Duffer’s did talk about this within the last year and basically confirmed it is usually the case for them, admitting the writing process for s4 was unique bc obviously they had a lot of time on their hands to focus on it with the hiatus.

They started filming s4 in Feb 2020. Hiatus put filming to a halt, I think it was March 8th 2020 or sometime around then. Then in June they posted a picture of the s4 scripts complete. And filming didn’t start up again until Sept/Oct 2020. So it still took them another couple months, even with hiatus, to officially finalize writing those last episodes, despite starting filming already.

I think Noah’s comment about the first three scripts a couple months ago (right?) could mean that at the very very least the first three were quite finalized at that time, enough to warrant sharing with the cast to prep.? By now they could have up to the 5th-6th more finalized at least. But maybe more?!

When it comes to the writers strike, I honestly can’t say for certain.

I would hope with how hands-on they are in including fans by informing us about certain milestones in the production process (they will definitely announce when s5 is officially in production on their social media), that they would disclose how this could affect s5, if a strike does in fact come into effect.

I would hate it if the strike started and they just went MIA for a month+. I know the longest strike in recent history was like 3-4 months I think? So that’s a fear that I have I guess, of them just disappearing and not even giving us crumbs to go off of in the mean time for fun.

But the duffers are also show runners and producers and directors, so I wonder if that means they’d just use them in place of the writers while filming? It would really just come down to solidarity and wanting to stand beside the people supporting the strike, which I assume the duffers fully support, so would they even undermine the strike and work despite it? I don’t know honestly.

Best case scenario, if a strike does happen, perhaps they would focus on the most fleshed out parts they already have written and don’t need rewrites for. Early s5 scenes are also what they are gonna prioritize filming anyways bc when it comes to marketing and promo they need that stuff filmed before the rest so they can have spoiler free content to share sooner than later, whereas only filming like the major stuff near the end, would mean little to no promo with canon content for them to share as time goes on. I mean, have you ever seen an official trailer use mostly later content from the season to promote it? It’s not unheard of to have some later stuff thrown in, but more often than not it just works out bc they don’t want that later stuff to be spoiled before the early stuff.

The promo we get the soonest will likely be from scenes in the first few eps so I do hope that with all things considered, there’s a possibility they could get the ball rolling and film a few things. Especially if they had so much planned out while filming s4, like s5 opener I could see being something they want to get out of the way asap especially if they have that the most fleshed out with concrete plans set in stone more than like a random scene near the end of the season, which still warrants some edits and doesn’t need to be finalized anytime soon anyways.

With how active they are rn, posting every Friday with a little assignment for the fans, has me hopeful they are planning ahead and don’t have the intention to step back and disappear even in the worst case scenario? You’d think they are aware of the worst case scenario rn and yet they’re just keeping it simple and having fun. And all the while filming rumors are already starting.

I’m not trying to stress about it bc it’s out of anyone’s control unless they manage to meet an agreement that’s worthy of not striking. I support them regardless of my bias to have ST start filming asap. Writers and a lot of aspects of this field deserve to be compensated for their hard work and I stand by that. If it takes a strike to make them get some results, so be it.

#byler #stranger things #st5 filming #writers strike

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creechurfoundincheckerboardvoid · 3 years ago

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I only started following you because of my salad fingers phase and you had a crossover comic featuring him, but now the lore of dhmis is enticing and I have no clue where to start. Can you- can you pwease explain it to me?

-dysrix anon

ok got it!!! no problem!!!!!

(before i start rambling excessively i just gotta say that's different to hear lol, i think the majority are around for the puppets and just tolerate mr sally's presence)

OK SO. dhmis is a webseries that started in 2011 as a short film made by a couple of college kids who wanted to say something about not imposing rules on how creativity should be expressed, because art school is kinda just Like That. that video was put on youtube and went really super viral and all the Reaction Video People were a "so scawy 😥" whiny baby about it. the creators wanted to make a series but left the idea alone because it was a lot of work and also expensive (puppetry). then in 2014 they were commisioned to make 2, they did, and then tony the talking clock (emphasis on those last three words) became a tumblr sexyman and a bunch of everyone started shipping him with sketchbook (who they called paige) and humanizing them and it was just this whole thing. anyway thanks to them the creators made a kickstarter to fund the rest of the series and it actually worked out, too. so i'd like to thank the clockfuckers we would not be here without you. i hope you fucked your clock. anyway then over the next two years the last four episodes came out and they were epic and gamer and increasingly Kinda Horrifying (three still messes me up a bit but none of the others ever scared me, it's just more weird than anything. in a very good way) and the last one, six, came out june 19th 2016 (which was father's day, and it hasn't been father's day june 19th since yesterday, and it won't be again until 2033), and it was awesome. then september 13th 2018 wakey wakey (thirteen second long trailer) happened and everyone lost their shit and then sundance film festival in january 2019 where they pitched that pilot they made around (and seeing as the pilot as we know it is almost certainly a lost media now, those very low-quality cam leaks on youtube are possibly all that remains). then in july 2020 they started making the show and well you know Plague Was A Thing That Happened so it was pretty quiet for a while and then august 30th 2021 they announced they finished filming and then february 25th there was a clip continuing the pirate joke and saying they were finishing lines and then late may wakey wakey disappeared aND THEN YESTERDAY FLY HAPPENED AND

and the reason i'm finishing that particular tangent very quickly is that i am now realising you were likely asking about the lore of the story itself. and not its process of existence

well

SO NO ONE KNOWS WHAT IT'S ABOUT.

there sure are a lot of ideas out there!! and i have definitely got my own ideas which i don't really talk about ever because they're honestly a bit too rude to the media theory (which i hate - a lot - but also which a lot a lot a lot of other people really like. so it'd be mean)

ANYWAY THE BASIC SUMMARY OF THE WEBSERIES is there are three puppets and they're yellow guy and red guy and duck and they all live in a house together and every episode some object in their house comes alive and sings to them a lesson about an abstract, basic concept like yknow creativity and time. so it's sort of meant to resemble something like sesame street at first. but these sentient objects (who are usually called "teachers") are kinda Really Fucked Up and the lessons go wrong really fast and usually end in uhhhh murder. also their life is a lie and it's like puppet matrix and roy, yellow guy's dad, really does seem to be the guy pulling the strings behind it all. man it's like thirty minutes total on youtube i don't want to spoil it TOO much in case you ever decide to check it out lol. oh wait. oh wait you asked where to start

well you start there!!!!!!

ALSO there's a bunch of lost videos and that one puppet interview and a collection of little things around miss becky's instagram or mr joe's twitter that all just weaves together with the main thing to make A Web of Story and it's awesome. i'd be glad to tell you all about that too if you ask!!!! i'm very normal about all this that's why i have lists and notes and a handful of rambly word document essays about this everywhere

ok i'm done thanks for coming to autism hour with creech

#uhhhhhhhh #long post

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aion-rsa · 4 years ago

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Upcoming Marvel Movies Release Dates: MCU Phase 4 Schedule, Cast, and Story Details

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A bold new era for the Marvel Cinematic Universe began in 2021 on Disney+ with the wildly successful WandaVision and The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, but Marvel Studios certainly hasn’t been resting on its laurels in terms of upcoming cinematic blockbusters. Not only does it have Black Widow (finally) ready for theatrical release, but we’ve also got Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings, Eternals, Thor: Love and Thunder, and Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness all in various stages of production, there are also TV series on the way for the likes of Hawkeye, Ms. Marvel, Moon Knight, She-Hulk, and more!

Well, if you’ve been a little confused by Marvel’s shifting dates and streaming priorities, never fear! We’ve got a comprehensive release calendar for you here detailing all the forthcoming MCU projects, so you’ll always be able to find the latest updates when you need them.

Let’s take a look at everything Marvel has in store over the next few years…

Loki

Release Date: June 9, 2021

Tom Hiddleston will reprise his most famous role, as Loki finds himself on a heist through time and space “as he steps out of his brother’s shadow” after the events of Avengers: Endgame! Oh, and based on this trailer, there’s all kinds of time-travelling weirdness awaiting, including the return of Heimdall, some other Asgardian hijinks, DB Cooper (yes!), Owen Wilson playing an obscure character based on a beloved Marvel Comics writer, and…Loki possibly running for President!

Tom Hiddleston stars, of course, and the cast also includes Gugu Mbatha-Raw, Sophia Di Martino, Wunmi Mosaku, and Richard E. Grant. Michael Waldron is head writer and Kate Herron is directing.

Black Widow

Release Date: In theaters and on Disney+ with Premier Access Friday, July 9, 2021

The Black Widow movie was heading for a May 1, 2020 release before the pandemic, but Disney and Marvel decided to delay it until the industry’s infrastructure was back to some semblance of normal. They seemed absolutely committed to keeping Natasha on a theatrical release rather than sending her to Disney+, but eventually semi-caved in March as it was confirmed that Black Widow would hit both streaming and theaters simultaneously in July.

Here’s the official synopsis:

“Natasha Romanoff aka Black Widow confronts the darker parts of her ledger when a dangerous conspiracy with ties to her past arises. Pursued by a force that will stop at nothing to bring her down, Natasha must deal with her history as a spy and the broken relationships left in her wake long before she became an Avenger.”

Cate Shortland directed the film, and Scarlett Johansson stars, with Florence Pugh and David Harbour alongside her. One of the movie’s villains is Taskmaster, and we wrote a little bit more about him right here.

Natasha Romanoff will get a prequel movie of sorts here, as we catch up with Widow right around the events of Captain America: Civil War. Will the plot affect her character’s ultimate fate in Endgame? Do not count on it.

What If…?

Release Date: Summer 2021

The beloved comic book series that tells tales of how things might have turned out differently in the Marvel Universe is becoming an animated series on Disney+!

Here’s the official synopsis:

“What If…? flips the script on the MCU, reimagining famous events from the films in unexpected ways…Marvel Studios’ first animated series focuses on different heroes from the MCU, featuring a voice cast that includes a host of stars who reprise their roles.”

We know that at least a couple of these roles include Chadwick Boseman’s final performance as T’Challa as well as the return of Hayley Atwell as Agent Peggy Carter!

Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings

Release Date: September 3, 2021

Simu Liu has been cast as the titular Shang-Chi and Tony Leung as The Mandarin (hey, that name sounds familiar! But this time, we’re getting the real Mandarin on screen). Destin Daniel Cretton is directing from a script by Dave Callaham. Given its “Ten Rings” title, Shang-Chi should be steeped in Marvel lore, going all the way back to the first Iron Man film!

Hopefully this will be Marvel’s most action-packed movie yet. The trailer sure makes us think so.

Venom: Let There Be Carnage

Release Date: September 17, 2021

Andy Serkis (Mowgli) steps behind the camera for Venom 2, which now boasts the catchy title of Venom: Let There Be Carnage. The first film, buoyed by a terrific showing at the Chinese box office, made an absolute ton of money, despite being released to mostly scathing reviews.

Venom: Let There be Carnage will follow up Sony’s 2018 Spider-Man-less spinoff film, but will likely be more connected to the MCU this time around, thanks to a renewed deal between the company and its Marvel Studios partners. Tom Hardy will return as Eddie Brock, of course, and as you can probably guess from that title, he’ll be facing off against Woody Harrelson’s villain, Cletus Kasady aka Carnage!

We wrote about all the cool Marvel stuff happening in the above trailer right here.

The Eternals

Release Date: Nov. 5, 2021

Acclaimed Nomadland helmer (and Oscar winner!) Chloe Zhao is directing Marvel’s Eternals from a script by Matthew and Ryan Firpo. Marvel described the film as an “epic story, spanning thousands of years” that features “a group of immortal heroes forced out of the shadows to reunite against mankind’s oldest enemy, The Deviants.”

The cast features Richard Madden as Ikaris, Kumail Nanjiani as Kingo, Lauren Ridloff as Makkari, Brian Tyree Henry as Phastos, Salma Hayek as Ajak, Lia McHugh as Sprite, Don Lee as Gilgamesh, Angelina Jolie as Thena, Gemma Chan as Sersi, and Kit Harrington as Dane Whitman, the Black Knight. We meet all these characters in the trailer, which we wrote more about here.

This one was another victim of the release date shuffle, but we’ll finally get to see Jack Kirby‘s wildest creations soon enough!

Spider-Man: No Way Home

Release Date: Dec. 17, 2021

The next Spider-Man movie looks like a big one! Spider-Man: No Way Home will once again take place in the MCU since Marvel and Sony solved their differences, good sense prevailed, and Tom Holland’s Peter Parker will remain a vital part of the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

This one, well…this might be a live action Spider-Verse movie from the sound of it. Jamie Foxx will reprise his role as Electro from the maligned Amazing Spider-Man films and Alfred Molina will return from the Raimi era as Doctor Octopus.

Wait. Are they trying to make this a multiversal Sinister Six movie? Because…we could be down for that.

Hawkeye

Release Date: Late 2021

Jeremy Renner returns as Clint Barton to train his replacement as Hawkeye, Hailee Steinfeld’s Kate Bishop! Apparently based on the brilliant run of comics by Matt Fraction and David Aja, Hawkeye will also prominently feature Lucky the Pizza Dog, one of the great canines in Marvel Comics history.

The cast also includes Vera Farmiga as Eleanor Bishop, Fra Fee as Kazimerz Kazimierczak, Tony Dalton as Jack “Swordsman” Duquesne, Florence Pugh as Yelena Belova, Alaqua Cox as Maya “Echo” Lopez, and Zahn McClarnon as Willie Lincoln. We wrote more about all these new characters here.

Ms. Marvel

Release Date: Late 2021

Ms. Marvel is finally coming to live action! Here’s the official synopsis for the series…

“Ms. Marvel introduces Kamala Khan—a 16-year-old Pakistani-American growing up in Jersey City. “A great student, an avid gamer and a voracious fan-fiction scribe, she has a special affinity for superheroes, particularly Captain Marvel. But Kamala struggles to fit in at home and at school—that is, until she gets super powers like the heroes she’s always looked up to. Life is easier with super powers, right?”

The cast includes Iman Vellani as Kamala Khan aka Ms. Marvel, Aramis Knight, Saagar Shaikh, Rish Shah, Zenobia Shroff, Mohan Kapur, Matt Lintz, Yasmeen Fletcher, Laith Naki, Azher Usman, Travina Springer, and Nimra Bucha. Episodes are directed by Adil El Arbi & Bilall Fallah, Meera Menon, and Sharmeen Obaid-Chinoy.

This is going to be a big one, folks, because Kamala is going to be a significant player in Captain Marvel 2. How significant? The title of the movie is now The Marvels!

Morbius

Release Date: January 21, 2022

Spider-Man spinoff Morbius is Sony’s next big Marvel wild card, and it’ll officially be the first spinoff to properly connect to the MCU (even if Marvel Studios still isn’t officially acknowledging it in their own promotional materials the way they are with Spider-Man: No Way Home). Here’s the official synopsis for the film…

“Dangerously ill with a rare blood disorder, and determined to save others suffering his same fate, Dr. Morbius attempts a desperate gamble. What at first appears to be a radical success, a darkness inside him is unleashed and transforms this healer into a hunter.”

Safe House‘s Daniel Espinosa directs from a script by Matt Sazama, Burk Sharpless, Art Marcum, and Matt Holloway. Jared Leto stars as the vampiric title character, and the cast also includes Matt Smith, Adria Arjona, Jared Harris, Al Madrigal, and Tyrese Gibson.

Read more about the character of Michael Morbius here.

Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness

Release Date: March 25, 2022

Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness looks like it will open up the storytelling possibilities in the MCU like never before. And that’s just based on the name alone. Scott Derrickson was scheduled to direct, but bowed out because of “creative differences” with Marvel. But the good news is that Marvel found a suitable replacement in none other than Sam Raimi, who of course has plenty of superhero experience thanks to his Spider-Man trilogy in the early 2000s!

This one has loads of connections to the wider MCU. Elizabeth Olsen will be here as Wanda Maximoff post-WandaVision, and the film will also connect to Spider-Man: No Way Home and its own multiversal ambitions. There are also a few rumors doing the rounds that Jericho Drumm aka Brother Voodoo could be introduced in this sequel. We’ll keep an eye on that and update this if there’s any substance to them.

Thor: Love and Thunder

Release Date: May 6, 2022

Taika Waititi, who gave us the delightful Thor: Ragnarok, will return to write and direct. Chris Hemsworth will be back. Natalie Portman is your new Thor (yes, you read that right, Jane Foster will wield the hammer…just as she did in the comics!). Christian Bale has also joined the cast as the terrifying Gorr the God Butcher. Not only that, this movie will finally put Olympians in the MCU with Russell Crowe as Zeus. Can Hercules be far behind?

Oh, and did we mention that the Guardians of the Galaxy will be along for the ride, too?

Black Panther 2: Wakanda Forever

Release Date: July 8, 2022

Black Panther 2 is now called Black Panther: Wakanda Forever. Marvel has made it official that after the tragic, untimely death of Chadwick Boseman they have no intention of recasting the role of T’Challa, which is absolutely the right move.

Ryan Coogler will return as director, but there are no other details currently available. Interestingly, Coogler is also bringing a Wakanda TV series to Disney+ at some point in the future, too, and something tells us this Wakanda-centric title for the sequel is a sign of things to come.

Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse Sequel

Release Date: October 7, 2022

Is it technically an MCU movie? Nope. But with all the legal weirdness going on between Marvel and Sony, and this franchise’s very multiversal concept, who’s really to say that it ISN’T an MCU movie either, right? In any case, the sequel to the best Spider-Man movie of all time is coming in 2022 with Avatar: The Last Airbender mastermind Joaquim Dos Santos directing and David Callaham writing.

There’s also an “untitled Marvel movie” still technically scheduled for this date but…that is almost certainly not gonna happen now. Expect whatever that project was to move to one of these below dates or to some other currently unspecified date on the calendar.

Captain Marvel 2: The Marvels

Release Date: November 11, 2022

WandaVision writer Megan McDonnell has been tapped to write the screenplay for Captain Marvel 2, which now boasts the title of The Marvels. You know what else is really cool? Candyman‘s Nia DaCosta will direct!

We have no idea where we’ll find Carol Danvers (Brie Larson) in the sequel to her hugely successful first standalone MCU entry. Will she be fighting to loosen her former Kree pals’ iron grip on a pre-Avengers galaxy? Or will the follow up film see her fighting for justice in the present?

In any case, we know that she’ll be facing off with Zawe Ashton as a currently-unnamed antagonist, and WandaVision‘s Monica Lambeau (Teyonah Parris) will also return in her superpowered state after the events of that game-changing show. Considering that Monica was once known as “Captain Marvel” in the comics, that title of The Marvels becomes more appropriate. And even MORE appropriate when you realize that Kamala Khan, Ms. Marvel, will also be making her big screen debut.

Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania

Release date: Feb. 17, 2023

Peyton Reed will return to direct the third installment of the Ant-Man saga, making him the first director in MCU history to complete a trilogy…perhaps the most unlikely trilogy in Marvel’s entire arsenal. Paul Rudd will return as Scott Lang, and you can certainly expect Evangeline Lilly to return as The Wasp and Michael Douglas as Hank Pym.

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The villain of the film? That will be Kang the Conqueror, who will be played by Lovecraft Country‘s Jonathan Majors. The inclusion of Kang opens up all kinds of interesting possibilities for the MCU, and may even tease the arrival of the Fantastic Four down the line! We wrote more about those possibilities right here.

We’re also going to need fast confirmation on Michael Pena’s return as Luis, though. Luis is key…

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3

Release date: May 5, 2023

After a tumultuous period which saw James Gunn fired and then rehired as Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 director, he will finally return to complete his spacefaring trilogy for the studio. However, Gunn can’t even begin filming Guardians 3 until he finishes production on The Suicide Squad for DC, as well as an HBO Max Peacemaker prequel. Once those projects are finished, he’s free to return to the MCU.

Avengers: Endgame left the team in an interesting place. We broke down some of the story possibilities right here.

And then there are still some dates that Marvel has announced that they have yet to match projects to. Those dates are…

July 28, 2023

Oct 7, 2023

Nov. 10, 2023

Some of those dates could very well be good fits for the following films…

Fantastic Four

The MCU Fantastic Four movie is finally happening! Marvel seems to be hinting that Fantastic Four will be their next priority after Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3. So is it possible that we’ll see it on July 28, 2023? That sure would be a great piece of summer blockbuster real estate to launch what might be the most important piece of the MCU going forward!

Marvel’s first family will join the Marvel Cinematic Universe in a film directed by Jon Watts, who did such a wonderful job with the first two MCU Spider-Man movies. That’s all the information that’s out there at the moment, but as soon as we have more, we’ll update this. It also appears that WandaVision started to set up the Fantastic Four, so stay tuned. We have our own theories on why Marvel went with the Fantastic Four before the X-Men, but that’s another story.

Blade

In 2019, Marvel announced that they will be rebooting the Blade franchise with Mahershala Ali playing the titular daywalker. Ali’s True Detective co-star – and former Blade villain – Stephen Dorff is excited to see what he can do with the character, and so are we.

Could Marvel decide to drop this in that Oct. 7, 2023 release date? Considering that’s the Halloween season and Blade is, y’know, a vampire hunter, they’d have to be foolish not to, right?

Captain America 4

The Falcon and the Winter Soldier showrunner Malcolm Spellman is co-writing a currently-untitled Captain America 4 with another FWS alum, Dalan Musson. Those are pretty much all the details that are currently available on this one at this time, but at least we know that Anthony Mackie will return as Sam Wilson in that incredibly badass Captain America costume they gave him for that show. We wrote some more about the potential story possibilities for this one right here.

There’s no date or director for this one yet, so even 2023 seems like it might be a longshot.

Deadpool 3

Wendy Molyneux and Lizzie Molyneux-Loeglin will be the writing team tasked with bringing the Merc with a Mouth to the MCU. What a Deadpool 3 could look like in the interconnected Marvel Cinematic Universe is, of course, anybody’s guess, but if anyone can crack wise about the follies of this kind of corporate synergy, it’s Ryan Reynolds.

And then there’s the lingering TV stuff, at least two of which will arrive in 2022, with the balance likely to arrive in 2023…

She-Hulk

Tatiana Maslany will play Jennifer Walters, a lawyer who ends up with her cousin Bruce’s gamma-irradiated blood. Hilarity certainly ensues. Kevin Feige has promised that since this will be a courtroom show, you never know who else from the MCU could show up.

It’s possible we’ll get She-Hulk on Disney+ in 2022, but nothing is confirmed at this stage.

Moon Knight

Oscar Isaac will play Marc Spector, a disturbed fortune hunter who also happens to be the avenging avatar of an Egyptian moon god. Oscar Isaac is already training hard for the role, and the series is now officially in production, so we wouldn’t be surprised if we see this one on Disney+ in 2022.

Ironheart

The first of two series that will explore the legacy of Iron Man and Tony Stark in the MCU, Ironheart stars Dominique Thorne as Riri Williams, a teenager at M.I.T. who creates her own suit of armor to right the wrongs of the world.

Armor Wars

Don Cheadle will reprise his role as Rhodey and will have the solo spotlight in the War Machine armor in a series that deals with a nightmare scenario for the MCU: what if Tony Stark’s Iron Man technology fell into the wrong hands and was getting duplicated by villains? Based on a classic comics run, Armor Wars promises big action and lots of obscure bad guys. We can’t wait.

Secret Invasion

Samuel L. Jackson will return as Nick Fury alongside Ben Mendelsohn as Talos for a series about the shape-shifting Skrull infiltration of Earth. Kingsley Ben-Adir is apparently playing the villain of the series. Olivia Colman, Emilia Clarke, and Killian Scott also star.

On directing duties are Thomas Bezucha (Let Him Go) and Ali Selim (The Looming Tower) while Mr. Robot vet Kyle Bradstreet is the head writer.

Secret Invasion could be the biggest thing to happen to the MCU since Endgame.

Wakanda

Very few details are available on this one at the moment, but Ryan Coogler will develop at least one Wakanda-set TV series for Disney+. Could this have anything to do with that Wakanda Forever title for Black Panther 2? We wrote more about some of the implications of this here.

We’ll keep updating this with new information as it becomes available!

The post Upcoming Marvel Movies Release Dates: MCU Phase 4 Schedule, Cast, and Story Details appeared first on Den of Geek.

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vlads-yuka · 5 years ago

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A few Ikepri suitor theories (hc?)

So just earlier (not really anymore, since this took me a few d a y s) I was talking on discord about who among the suitors would be which type (the mom, yandere, tsundere etc) and since I wrote such a long thing about Rio, I thought I could try to do the same for the others 👉👈

I base my assumptions on translations I found of canon content (as of June 7th) as well as my own understanding of Japanese (I might be wrong about things that I claim canon, so if I do please tell me).

♦

Leon

So it's pretty obvious that Leon is the Ore-sama type basic black haired first guy. I honestly don't have much to say about him, his animal is the Lion, often labeled as the king of animals (how funny haha) so he's going to be very proud and probably use MC just to do his thing and that's it. It's likely he treats MC unfairly and grants you a few misogynistic comments about how useless you are if not to allow him the throne. Eventually, he'll fall in love and become at first awkward af and then probably really sweet and somewhat protective (he has a goal to achieve and his pride won't allow him to let you be hurt in front of him). He'll have some kind of sexy scene when feelings are returned and single handedly resolve whatever drama happens while swearing to protect you and make you happy once everything is over.

♦

Yves

Yves is really awkward. He tries to act tough like he doesn't give a damn but that's to hide that he's too clumsy to say things honestly (unless it comes to Licht). Pretending to be a tsundere, maybe his lack of luck will also come with the fact that being a bitch to everyone draws them away from you, and he's probably scared of hurting the people he cares about with his harsh words, but that's his only way to hide his "weak" self. He actually doesn't feel comfortable with a lot of people so he doesn't bother opening up. He's dense as fuck and doesn't realize that Licht DOESN'T CARE. Once you try hard enough and keep on being nice to him even though he'd expect you to hate him by now, he'll be so thrown off guard that you'll get to see his adorable stuttering messy self. He'll probably threaten you to not spill what you know about this part of him. He'll gradually sweeten and allow himself to touch more MC and he probably has the cutest laugh once he fully opens up. He's not really clingy unless he's sleeping with MC (you're not getting out of the hug until he says so) and will act selfishly from time to time because suddenly he wants a hug but doesn't want to do it in front of everyone. Note that his earring will be an important part of his past and since there's only one of it, it's either that the other is somewhere else or it's originally not an earring and was something else belonging to someone dear to him. He might break/lose it at some point in his route (since he's unlucky). After MC help him trying to fix/find it for his sake he'll grow soft and tell her how she makes him happier than ever by being her lover and he doesn't need it anymore if he has you, thanking you to have let him love you (I'm thinking about that one adorable cg in the trailer where you can't see his earring and I can't tell if it's just hidden or not) and he'll find/have it fixed soon after. He'll probably tell you that being by your side makes him feel better because he's so lucky to have you that it's almost like his usual rotten luck is meaningless (or at least that's what he'll think if he's too embarrassed to say it). He probably needs to be praised (not exaggerated or he'll sulk thinking you're making fun of him) and he'll blush into an adorable mess.

♦

Licht

Licht is that one suitor who thinks he doesn't need anyone (and no one needs or wants him). He's super love deprived and will say mean stuff like he's too cool for you (it's canon he's a kuudere and misanthropist) and sincerely doesn't want to have to do anything with anyone. He's the definition of a lone wolf (funny innit) and will be cold, interested and mean with MC for a good part of the beginning of his route. Now this could go two ways. Either Nokto will reveal you about his/their past (because he's that bitch but he probably cares about him) which will allow you to somewhat find your way inside his shell and let you do something he likes, which would, for once, let him show his pure and cute smile, or something will happen causing him to have to protect you (it may be a real danger, but I'd rather think it would be something not necessarily dangerous but triggering to a trauma) and he'd drop his resting bitch face. I think his case could be similar to Kenshin's. He doesn't dislike people, he just hates that he can't/couldn't protect them. His animal being the wolf, I think Licht would become very protective once in a relationship. Him being the powerful male of you two, he'd act like the leader of a bundle of wolves and protect you as you and him. By that I mean he doesn't protect you especially, he protect what the both of you are, and it's like protecting himself at the same time. I think he'd be really quite but would love nuzzling in private. He's that one prince who's icy to everyone but warm to his lover in private. In the same logic as protecting, he'd make sure that you have everything you need and I can imagine Nokto working a bit behind the scenes too to make sure Licht can open himself in a good environment with MC. I don't think Licht hates Nokto, but I definitely think he'd be mad that Nokto is popular and can keep people around him (and in that way, somewhat protect them) so I can see Nokto understanding that and plotting things so MC can help his brother regain confidence. Licht would be the type to, like wolves, have his lover stick to him all the time, but it wouldn't feel obsessive, it'd feel more natural and protective (he's definitely not a yandere imo). In terms of displays of affection, he wouldn't be too vocal about his feelings (he doesn't know much about it yet, it's not really familiar to him to let himself feel so much) and wouldn't say much in general, he's more of an action person. In public, your hands would probably be GLUED but that's about it. In private he'd definitely hug a lot more than kissing and would be the big spoon most of the time when cuddling.

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Jin

I have a feeling Jin is one of those suitors who thinks MC is too pure for him and he shouldn't stain them with however disgusting he thinks he is. I expect him to be a fun mix between Shingen and Arthur and I'm pretty sure his route will be a RIDE. He's absolutely shameless and probably touchy (it's canon he's a boob man, Clavis said it so you better believe it), but I don't think he will with MC. Since he said in his profile he wants to watch MC chose a suitor rather than get involved in becoming king, I think it's going to start by him spending gradually less time with Clavis as he spies on you. Naturally, he'll fall in love (before MC does) and understand quite fast but might take some time to acknowledge it. Something will probably happen like MC randomly tripping or facing a dangerous situation for him to come out of the shadows to protect both her body and her pureness (the type of guy to fight while telling you to not open your eyes and remove your hands from your ears until he says so). Upon you thanking him, he'll go with a bitter smile because he knows he loves it but doesn't deserve it. MC will probably try to make it up to him and so he will spend more and more time being intoxicated with love while trying to push you away. Will come a moment where something bad happens and he realizes that the only way to protect what he wants to protect is with the throne. He'd probably say some cheesy line like "I didn't intend to become the king but I guess it wouldn't be too bad to have you as my wife" and will end up accepting. He'll be a king putting the well-being of the people before his and he'll keep on saying how proud he is of you. In terms of affection, he wouldn't go overboard in public but he'd definitely say some inappropriate stuff in your ear to make you blush in front of important guests. I think he would definitely keep PDA to a minimum because you're his woman and he doesn't want anyone else to see your pleasured face. But boy once you're together between 4 walls he has no self control and doesn't care a single bit if you want to work a little more before sleeping, because you're not going to be able to anyways with him in your bed. An eagle looks like it'd be free spirited and proud so I think this is where his personality will go.

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Chevalier

The information we have on him definitely makes him one of the hardest characters to guess for me, so I'm quite unsure and I'm sorry (I love him tho). For a start, I think a good comparison would be Nobunaga, since the first impression is pretty much the same. Now Chevalier certainly isn't as shameless as Nobu when it comes to touching women (in fact, I think that in the beginning of the route he'd be treating MC with respect but lots of distance). I'm pretty sure I caught him referring to himself as a monster several times, and he's convinced that his core is filth. However, the fact that he's a monster doesn't mean he can't do anything good. The fact that he's often drenched in blood means he fights a lot and this comforts him in his own thought that he's a monster (my best guess is that he's been called so by people in his childhood because he beat some brat up or something and he just decided to stick with it because it's just more convenient than trying to explain why he did), as well as the fact that he probably doesn't smack just anyone and does so it protect his ideals (in that way, he's quite like Mitsuhide). Again, I think that, like Mitsuhide, he overall doesn't bother supporting his acts with saying why he does them, and just does what he thinks is right. Rio mentioned that Chevalier is a late riser and Sariel added that tigers are nocturnal. During night, I think he secretly does some sort of charity stuff (secretly, because it's just laughable to have a monster do charity and he wants to keep acts of light away from his name, that's associated with filth) and probably also beats up some criminals here and there. I think that this would be uncovered a night where MC can't sleep and follows Chevalier out of the castle (maybe she's curious and wants to understand him more, maybe he dropped something) and finds about it. He's not stupid and MC probably is to some extent as usual so he'll notice and will start to tell her why he does this and why he doesn't want it to be known. Following this event MC will start to think that after all he's not just a monster and will stick with him when he goes doing charity at night because you can "Do whatever, it's not my business". While spending time there with you, you'll slowly creep up on his list of things he wants to protect even if he has to stain his hands. Of course, some kind of drama will lead him to have to do it, probably in front of a large number of people and I can see him leaving his sword aside and kneeling to the enemy to protect MC from danger. There, he'll show his sweet side and his desire to see you happy more than anything. Of course, you, who already loved him, will call him out on his bs and tell him you don't want him to be hurt either and you love his beautiful smile. He'll definitely be confused at first but then will take a new breathe and save you, who became a part of him. He'll obviously still think of himself as a monster, but he knows that doesn't mean you can't love him. He won't stop fighting for his ideals, but now that he has to protect himself to protect you, he'll stop being as reckless and definitely will be thankful that you helped him access the throne to pursue his dreams (even though at first everyone told you that you should stay away from him, but you loved seeing his eyes so full whenever he was doing something good). In terms of relationship, Chevalier will be reasonably protective and will trust you to not betray him because "Only you could love a monster like me, and I won't stop loving you either" or something like that. He'll definitely be quite of a tease in private when he wants things to get heated but most of the time it'll just be fluffy with small forehead kisses, hair combing and warm hugs (he's always the big spoon and he's soo warm).

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Clavis

You heard it, the court's number one problem child is romanceable (and this is so messy wtf I literally can't decypher him at all I feel like I wrote something so wrong for him ugh I'm so sorry). He loves to stir up drama and then sit back to watch and has no shame in doing so. Since MC will, as usual, be kinda dumb and innocent, Clavis will tease her A LOT, and use her to stir up even more shit. No one at the court really likes him (COUGH Sariel COUGH) but some somewhat tolerate him, like Chevalier (but if he goes overboard he'll end him). I mean I say no one important, because he sure has a lot of women swooning over him, but I can see him being all flirty and stuff but then not doing anything because he just doesn't really care, it's for fun (lol). When he mentioned Jin's preference, I think he said that he himself was more of an ass man (he said something like leg or something iirc but bruh we all know what that entails when the other option is boobs). Clavis will propose you to mess up the king election (more like drag you into it), but I'm pretty sure that it's because he knows that something fucked up is happening or bound to happen. It seems he will pull up a Mitsuhide except he drags you into it, probably to have you by his side when shit will go down so he can protect you (since you'll trust him, i guess ?). Everything will go according to plan, except for the fact that he's starting to be fond of you, so instead of just having you into the drama and protect you from afar, he'll start to actively stick with you, which will screw up his plans. I'm honestly not too sure about what will happen but basically he realizes he can't be as carefree as usual when something so big is going on and his love interest is in the middle of it because of him and decides to tell you what is happening so you can untrust yourself to him. I think from this point onwards, you both will somewhat have understood what you feel for each other, but nothing will have been said. Hand holding will be normal, and cuddling too if the situation forces you both to stick together outside and/or hide. He figures he'll just confess properly after everything will be over and he'll get to apologize for getting you into all of this. Once it is actually over, he'll turn into a big romantic (Chevalier but cringe) to start the relationship like it deserves to and then will proceed to tease the shit out of you. Overall he'll be a Mitsuhide or Leonardo type lover in my opinion. Now HEAR ME OUT, have you ever seen a leopard walking ? It's beautiful. He knows it. I can just see him walking while somehow seductively balancing his hips sjshid imagine him crawling on bed djdbjd MY MIND IS GOING DOWN THE GUTTER. He's such a flirty seductive ass but I swear he's loyal he just wants to see your cute pouting face. He's quite blunt when it comes to PDA (that's where the fact that he's an ass man comes in handy if you see me haha I can't help it he has a thot dot) and will not hesitate to straight up make out in public if he thinks it's needed (he's not dumb sjbsix he likes to stir up shit for fun but he wouldn't do something extreme if he knew it would end up bad when there are other ways).

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Nokto

Two words: skirt-chasing liar. The man painted his nails to have them black when he does the fox/kitsune hand symbol, he's totally trying to have people distrust him. It is mentioned that Nokto's behavior is a great contrast to his past heroic acts. Linking this to what I wrote of Licht, I think he might have been praised for whatever he did and he hated it because he didn't reach his goal (like nobunaga who unites Japan but hates the fact that there are victims nonetheless). What would be the most interesting would be if it was like I hypothesized of Licht, that he couldn't protect someone in particular. In that way, there would be a contrast between Licht feeling like he can't protect anything and Nokto who can protect everything but what he really cares about. Following this logic, his womanizer personality could be explained in the way that by chasing skirts left and right he can feel like he doesn't have anyone important and protect himself from the pain of loving someone too much and the pain of losing them. Now, either the two's traumas are totally different, or it might be the same event; if so, my best guess would be their mother's death. However, Nokto being a womanizer leads me to think that it was actually a love interest that he lost. Being a good liar and trickster (kitsune things), I assume he's good at reading people and is probably very observant of his brother. If his brother even confided in him, I'm pretty sure Nokto would hide his disappointment of not having been able to protect a few people for his brother's sake. I think his route (or at least the beginning of it) would be a mix of Mitsuhide and Arthur's, being some bold flirting at first as a warning because he wants to draw pure MC away from him. I think MC would then be drawn by his caring attitude toward Licht (almost like a big brother, even though he's the 7th prince and Licht is the 6th) and would make him notice how kind he is. Nokto would probably find a way to make her uncomfortable with heavy flirting mixed up with denying but if it repeats, he'll probably just say that he wants to protect the last person he dares to care about. MC would probably see pain and sadness in his gaze and choice of words and kind of like Arthur's route, she'd be drawn to this vulnerable caring side of him and understand the flirting is only a part of Nokto. Drama will happen, and Nokto will have a breakdown, because he got attached to MC and is convinced he won't be able to protect her. It's likely he tries to push you away even more to make you mad and break his own heart before he has to see you die before his eyes too. Due to this bring a heavy and very bottled up trauma, he will be looking very distressed and MC will rather try to soothe him. I do think Nokto might be crying at this moment (the other one I have in mind would be Yves) and both will realize their feelings at this very moment. However Nokto still won't think he can protect you, but maybe Licht would think something like "I can't protect anything by myself but I can help my brother protect what he cares for" and help him, which would easy Nokto into the idea of having to fight. It's also possible Clavis and Chevalier join in, but I'm not too sure about that. In terms of relationship, Nokto would be a super touchy fluffy lover, liking to feel your chest move in rythm with your breath against his chest while hugging you tightly reminds him that you're alive and that he could protect you and he always will no matter how many times he has to. Like Licht, he would be very protective, but he won't become too obsessive if you soothe him back enough and prove him that you won't break in his palm (the fact that he becomes king also helps since you can have personal royal guards). He's a bit more into PDA than his brother and won't mind resting his hand on your hip in public, but your cute facial expressions are for his own pleasure only~

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Luke

So Luke is the big brother one (but only for MC) and apparently he's lazy. Like a bear, he's huge but you can bet he would spoon you For his lazy traits, I think it might just be his personality, but I do think his doting comes from his past. A guess would be that he was very fond of his little sister but lost her to another man for arranged marriage. I don't know where or when Ikepri happens but arrange marriage can be planned very early, and this would explain his hate/disinterest for official affairs and his doting (it's like he would try to see his little sister in MC while treating her as such) and the fact that he tries to drag her out of official affairs as well. Like mentioned in his profile, his eyes sometimes look somewhat dark and dull, so I assume this could be when he thinks back about his past. I wouldn't go as far as saying he's a yandere, but he'll definitely try to drag her away from court life (not especially people, not especially violently, he'd just try to not lose her). It's sad, but you will probably get sis-zoned for a nice long time before he realizes that 1. he can't force you to do something you don't want to and 2. he doesn't just love you as a sister. Maybe this realization will make him want to become king with you to not lose you, or maybe he will be needing a little something else to be pushed to do so. In terms of relationship, he'll be doting and have remnants of big brother behavior but he'll finish his light scolding sessions with a big fluffy hug. Jokes on you if you wanted to spoon him. For PDA, I think he'd be pretty much just like hand holding and head pats/hair ruffling.

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Sariel

Sariel is known in the court as the "Devil". I would say his role is a mix of Giles (midcind) and Mitsuhide. As the profile says, his past, identify etc is quite of a mystery so I wouldn't get too much into this. Now Sariel expects MC in his profile to kind of suck up to him and do as he pleases while she finds a new king. Whether Sariel is loyal to the princess (you) and the crown or not will determine whether he's simply a shady suitor or the villain of most of the other routes if not all of them (William things hehe). He'll obviously be EXTREMELY shady and will make it very clear that it's best you stay away from what his job entails. However MC will find a way, consciously or not, to get involved way too much in Sariel's affairs (Mitsuhide things haha, he radiates the energy of other chaotic shady suitors only) and he will have to first of all scold her a ton shit and secondly a find a way to get her out of his business. They will probably struggle together their way out of an important job of his and MC will most likely have a good impact on the overall outcome but he'll mostly scold you for getting on the brink of death thanks to what he'll consider a foolish move. As a relationship, once king, I don't think Sariel would go any further than formal hand holding, arm holding and back of the hand kisses. I have a feeling that in private he wouldn't be the touchiest either (I mean he's busy with his shady stuff) but he would definitely pull you into his lap without asking and I could see him stroking your hair while your head rest on his shoulder until he finishes work before carrying you to bed, whether you're asleep or not.

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Rio

Rio IS the yandere and it's 100% canon I'm not accepting critiques on this (someone saying "Look only at me, you only have to think about me" screams yandere already, not to talk about my obsession consisting of comparing him with Toneri of Yuroma) and I honestly think it's soooo cool that the yandere is a butler I love it. ANYWAYS. Rio lost his memory 3 years ago (he was already your butler back then) which means his memories only consist of serving you. That said, you're literally his world, his only friend and his master. I think Rio would be scared not only to forget about everything again and see (I assume) you sad again and forget all your smiles he saw for 3 years (I definitely think he's one of those suitors that love you right off the batch but give you the liberty to be happy with whoever), but also lose you as easily as he lost him memories. If he lost you to someone else, either he'd be forced to watch you be happy with another man, or be left behind. As a loyal dog, he would totally hate the later. Now being your love interest's butler is extremely convenient as a yandere. If he doesn't want you to get out of your room he just has to give you some sort of somniferous stuff or lock you in saying you're sick and "My Lady does not wish to receive anyone in her quarters". Butlers not only attend to their master's wishes (he does say that granting your selfish wishes is also his job), but also are their first connection to the outer world. If your butler doesn't come with you outside, he'll at least be there to see you off and the first person waiting for your return. Now I don't know what entails the secret behind his memory loss at all so I'll leave it as it is. I don't think Rio will be as brutal as Toma from Amnesia or anything (Sariel is watching too) and will probably try to convince you that you need to stay in for a while and that he'll look out for you (bonus points if something bad actually happens). I'm actually not sure to what extent Rio would go. Would he harm others ? Just keep them away ? I don't know, but a dog sure knows how to bite to protect its owner. The route will probably follow the classic yandere schematic: everything is fine, he gets really obsessive, you try to push him away, he gets hurt, you explain him that you love him too but you can't stay locked in forever, he eventually chills. As a king, I think he'd take some time to stop being there for his Mistress' every needs but he definitely would in private, he just wouldn't want to embarrass you in public. For PDA, he would also not be too touchy, sticking to basic butler extent touchy, but he'd be extremely cuddly in private, trying to hook up as much time as possible from you. He'd give a lot of little pecks and smol kisses everywhere on your face and neck until you stop working so he can pull you on the bed in his arms for a slower making out session.

♦

THAT'S IT

That took me quite a while, phew ! Sorry if there typos and sorry for the huge length inconsistency !

If you have something to add, especially regarding the ones I didn't write as much, please do say so in comments or in my messages and if it adds something to the analysis (and if you're okay with it) I'll add it with credits !

I'm so excited for Ikepri I hope to be able to play soon but for now it's 3am haha

#Ikepri #Ikemen prince #イケメン王子 #ikepri leon #ikepri yves #ikepri licht #ikepri jin #ikepri chevalier #ikepri clavis #ikepri nokto #ikepri luke #ikepri sariel #ikepri rio

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mind-of-chaos · 4 years ago

Text

A Long Jason Voorhees Theory

Friday the 13th, a well-known and loved camp slasher movie starring the infamous Jason Voorhees. Jason Voorhees, the camp slasher no one wants to meet; unless you're into the strong silent type. His name comes tethered to a ski-mask, machete, and Camp Crystal Lake. The question here, however, is why? Was Jason Voorhees really a cold hearted serial killer terrorizing countless camp counselors, or was there someone else behind it all? The boy who was drowned due to neglect, true killer or puppet?

It started in 1946, Pamela Voorhees and abusive husband, Elias Voorhees, in Cadiz, Ohio. Pamela thought she could hear the thoughts of her unborn child, prompting her to acts of violence. Whether this is deep-rooted psychosis or supernatural manipulation, is debated. In September, after a long endurance of abuse, Pamela hears a voice in her voice saying, “kill”. So, while Elias slept, Pamela attacked and hacked him to pieces. Discarding the pieces and burning the trailer to the ground. Once burned, driving across the Country side to Crystal Lake, where felt God had called her and she purchased a home.

June 13, 1946. Jason was finally born and afflicted with a severe deformity, Hydrocephalus. An abnormally large head and mental disabilities. With her intention to be caring, Pamela kept Jason isolated from the town of Crystal Lake. She had educated him on her own, on the outskirts of town. This meant the only person Jason would know is his mother, leading him to only have her to respect and love. Which would ultimately play a huge role in his later life. This indicates Jason's home life is defined as learning and listening.

However, during the summer of 1957, Pamela couldn’t find a babysitter for Jason; resulting in bringing him to Camp Crystal Lake, where she worked as a cook. As earlier stated, Jason was home-schooled, and with his mom majority of his life, and not around other kids. Leading the other kids to believe he wasn’t smart, and thus began bullying him. As expected, Jason attempted to escape his tormentors, but unfortunately the kids trapped him on the dock and threw him in the lake. Now, where was the intervention? One would believe at least one adult would have caught wind of this commotion. Instead of attending to their jobs, the counselors during this time were either engorged amongst themselves or having sex in the woods. Resulting in the neglect and death of Jason Voorhees.

Jason's body was never found leading up to the shutting down of Camp Crystal Lake, but somehow reopening the next summer. It was immediately shut down again when Pamela, mad with grief, murdered Barry and Claudette. The two previous counselors she primarily blamed for Jason's death. Pamela got away, unsuspected, and all following attempts to reopen the camp failed. Presumably due to sabotage by Pamela. The camp earned the nickname, “Camp Blood” by the Crystal Lake locals, believing the camp to be cursed. Somehow, Jason managed to survive, or perhaps been revived from drowning. But if Jason did in fact drown, how did he manage to be resurrected almost 20 years later? According to some theories, the answer is the Necronomicon. The Necronomicon is a book of the dead used to cast spells, summon demons, and the potential to resurrect dead people. The book does make an appearance in Friday 9, in the Voorhees old house (and in the game as an easter egg). With that said, then it can be theorized Pamela Voorhees, already driven mad with grief as well as explicitly murdering, used it to bring back her only beloved son. The use of this book would also explain Jason's supernatural strength, the ability to swim from one side of camp to the other at unnatural speeds (as well as Manhattan), and even survive all his “deaths”.

There's a hole in this theory though. If Pamela really did use the Necronomicon, then why did she wreck havoc on so many innocent counselors? The point of the first Friday 13th was to see her son again, that means the next Friday movies are pointless. Why would she wait 20 years later to resurrect Jason, and then risk getting caught for murder? On the subject of seeing her son, Pamela never even saw Jason drown. His body was also never recovered. In parts 2-4, Jason is seen as a grown and presumably healthy man. There's plausible theories that Jason never did drown, but managed to survive and became a hermit. Constructing a crude cabin in the woods, living off the land and whatever he could pilfer from the camp and possibly other parts of civilization. During these roughly 20 years, Pamela and Jason never saw each other until her death. Camp Crystal Lake reopens roughly 20 years later, and Pamela goes into a rage. After multiple nights of fires, poisoning, and killings, it comes down to a struggle with employee Alice Hardy on the lake shore. In the struggle, Alice beheads Pamela with a machete and falls exhausted into a canoe, both drifting off. The noise of the struggling could have possibly alerted Jason, who then came to investigate and discovered his mother's head and body. Explaining why her head, sweater, pants, and the machete is placed on a crude altar as a shrine to his beloved mother. An estimated 2 months go by, and Jason sets out to find his mother's killer. Why wait two months? Two months with his mother's severed head, is surely bound to mess with him. It's already implied Jason has at least one mental disability along with his Hydrocephalus. Up till this point, Jason doesn't talk. And what he says is hardly considered talking. He’s only heard saying “KI KI, MA MA”. It’s not hard to tell he’s trying to say, “kill kill, mom mom”. With this in mind, then it can be theorized the end result is Jason’s now a serial killer, and not a puppet. However, Pamela’s voice can be heard talking to him. Telling him to avenge her, they deserve to pay for what they did to him. But those two counselors are already dead, the rest of the counselors bloodshed is innocent.

Revisiting the Necronomicon, this can be all tied to supernatural elements. Perhaps Pamela really is talking to Jason, influencing him to kill more. She’s already past grieving, and just a murderer at this point. And if she had ahold of the Necronomicon, it's unknown what else she may have in her possession; or maybe what spells were cast. So she could really be talking to him, and influencing him to do her bidding. Jason would do as told from his mother, as his home life was learn and listen. For further proof of supernatural elements, Jason dies and goes to hell. Where he is confronted by Freddy Krueger, another evil supernatural entity, who manipulates dreams and kills. If Jason really was just a regular serial killer, then he wouldn’t have waited 20 years before killing. Even after he found his mother's severed head, he didn't go off on a murdering spree. He didn’t set out to avenge and make people pay till his mother told him to do so. He’s controlled by her no matter the setting. For example, in the summer of 1984, Jason chases counselor-to-be Ginny Field to his makeshift cabin where she discovers the shrine. Knowing the history, Ginny puts on Pamela's sweater and talks to Jason in an authoritative tone. Jason believes this to be his mother, and doesn’t attack Ginny. Ginny uses the machete and swings it into his shoulder, briefly knocking him out.

Jason is under his mothers control, and probably manipulation. Even if she isn’t using some form of supernatural element to talk to him, she still controls him. He believes she is telling him what to do, as it's something he’s known his whole life. Pamela Voorhees is the root cause of the entire story. She’s the one who heard voices in her head, murdered Elias Voorhees, believed Jason to be nothing but perfect, kept him away from society, murdered people, and had the Necronomicon in her home. By isolating Jason away, he would only know right from wrong from what she taught him. Which isn’t much if she believed him to be absolutely perfect. And if she is so hell-bent on murdering, how would Jason know that's wrong? Jason doesn’t have a sense of self. He is merely whatever his mother has told him to be, and what to do. He listens to her voice in his head, supernatural or not. He wasn’t born a killer, he didn’t grow up trying to murder people. He was simply a boy who needed so much more than being isolated by his mother. Perhaps if he had received proper education, and more human interaction, things would have turned out much differently. But because of Pamela Voorhees, Jason became a puppet. Whether it’s a puppet of supernatural forces, is up to the spectator.

#friday13th #jason voorhees #writing #creative writing #film essay #horror #horror essay #pamela voorhees #camp crystal lake #essay #necronomicon #PamelaVorheesWasANecromancer #scary movie #conspiracies #theories #kikikimamama

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jackdawyt · 5 years ago

Video

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Since my last news update in March, today I’m dissecting everything that has come out of the woodwork in April and May regarding Dragon Age 4. So, get some tea and let’s get this show on the road, because we’ve got over 4,000 words of news to delve into!

Reveal? (game shows/new hire/remaster):

Following the cancellation of E3, EA Play 2020 Live has been officially confirmed as a digital show, taking place on June 11th, at 4:00 pm PST / 7:00 pm EST.

Before the outbreak cancelled E3 2020, we knew Mike Gamble, the Project Lead on the next Mass Effect game had plans to make a physical appearance at E3/EA Play. So, the question remains, will BioWare still have a presence at EA Play this year?

Mike Gamble is one of the key members of the Mass Effect team, I highly doubt he’s talking about revealing the next Mass Effect game which is currently in very early stages of development, and won’t release until after Dragon Age 4. Perhaps, Mike back in 2019 was hinting at revealing the heavily rumoured Mass Effect Remaster this EA Play?

Earlier in May, EA had a quarterly conference call and it revealed some fascinating information regarding future unannounced titles. Currently, EA have “one more EA HD title, Four EA Partner titles and two mobiles games still unannounced”. Also, EA said "multiple titles" are set to launch on Nintendo Switch this year.

The EA HD title refers to a remaster of an EA game, hence why most people are speculating at the Mass Effect Trilogy. Venturebeat went on to officially state that this title was indeed the Mass Effect Trilogy.

So, there’s one rumoured possibility for the Mass Effect Trilogy Remaster to be revealed this EA Play, which is cool! BioWare may have a presence this year after all! But I know you all didn’t come for Mass Effect; you came for Dragon Age. So, what do we know about that franchise and a potential reveal?

Jo Berry, a Writer at EA retweeted EA Play Live’s announcement with a party emoji! 👀

This could be absolutely nothing, but at a whim, perhaps a reference to a Dragon Age 4 teaser, or EA Motive’s new I.P since she has worked within both teams....

On top of that, Brianne Battye, Writer at BioWare tweeted about her 8-year journey at BioWare. She’s very grateful for sharing her work, and the awesome people she’s worked with along the way.

Patrick Weekes replied saying they: “Cannot wait for everyone else to see what you've been working on recently. :)”

Then, Brianne said: “Right back at you :)”

Two HUGE witters on the Dragon Age team are excited for everyone else to see what they’ve all been working on recently! 👀 When I saw this tweet, I was trying to stay calm and keep my expectations low, but come on when you see a tweet like this, you just get so excited! The question is, when will we see what they’ve been working on, and is it anytime soon? Please?

Well, there is something else we need to talk about that may relate to a potential tease.

Hilary Heskett, who used to be EA’s Global Product Manager has returned to work at EA and BioWare. Put simply, she’s a Digital Marketer for BioWare.

Hilary; particularly, was heavily involved in Dragon Age: Inquisition’s marketing! In fact, the majority of her work at EA involved representing BioWare as a brand online creating trailers, key art, screenshots, packaging, and advertisements. So, it’s a fair assumption that she’ll be fulfilling the exact same role for future BioWare titles like Dragon Age 4.

With Hilary joining the team at this point in development, could the marketing stages of Dragon Age 4 soon begin, perhaps at EA Play? Or later on in 2020? Or is she going to be marketing the Mass Effect Remaster?

I sound impatient, but, in the past BioWare have a habit of starting the marketing stages of their products at least two years before an initial release.

With that, we’ve got to ask ourselves, is hiring a marketer at this point in time a mere coincidence? or is it preparation for when marketing does start? Are we on the verge of seeing Dragon Age 4 official content soon?

Not to waffle on, because we’ve got a lot to talk about in this video, but I was hired as a Digital Marketer for an app company in the UK. As I understand it, you normally enter projects, mid-to-end of production, because what would a marketer do in the early stages logically? Your role is to be there for the advertising of the product.

So, in BioWare’s case, it's my understanding that Hilary has joined the team with one year full-swing production, is she about to begin the marketing stages of the next Dragon Age game? Is the game ready for that stage? If anything, I think with Hilary’s background, she’s the perfect person to market Dragon Age 4.

On top of EA Play, Geoff Keighley announced Summer Game Fest, a new industry-wide celebration of video games. Showcasing digital news, In-game events, & playable content. EA are headlining the event with EA Play, but there are many other world premieres spread throughout the summer. So, there’s a potential for other trailer reveals later on in the year, not to mention The Game Awards.

And, there’s also this leak that shows Dragon Age 4 on a list of PS5 games from the newest issue of PlayStation magazine UK. PlayStation are having an event on June 4th, so we’ll find out if this leak is true soon enough.

If we’re going to see anything Dragon Age 4 related this year, EA Play is the biggest contender for a reveal. I know the whole world could do with that right now! At this current moment, there is no schedule for the show. However, Saria, myself, Fusselkorn and maybe other content creators will be streaming EA Play, no matter what, so turn those reminders on and come join us in our clown suits.

Development (teases/production):

Moving on to teases and development updates. Currently, BioWare are hiring a ‘Senior Outsource Producer.’

This is a pretty big deal, to those who don’t know what a ‘Senior Outsource Producer’ would do...

“Outsourcing development means to hire out any process of a business to third party. The process helps your company or organization to grow.”

To grant more perspective, during Mass Effect: Andromeda’s development, major aspects of the game's animations were outsourced to other EA studios.

However, this isn’t going to be the same for Dragon Age 4, this role is for one Producer to help the outsourcing team into a robust and comprehensive department that supports BioWare projects in all aspects of development.

I have friend in triple AAA games, and they had something to say about outsourcing regarding Dragon Age 4: “To be honest, I'd say (outsourcing is) different per studio due to scope. But with something big like Dragon Age I'd probably say outsourcing would start early to mid-production as they have a hell of a lot to do. Some studios outsource from the get go though so that's also possible. And It's rare that outsourcing starts in the final leg of development.”

What I understand from the job posting is that BioWare are looking to hire a producer who will be dedicated to outsourcing so they can establish a pipeline and maintain proper standards for outsourcing. This hiring was posted in May, so the studio might be a few months early from when they actually have to outsource. However, this process will be coming up soon in major development.

Moving on. In early April, Mark Darrah went on a twitter rampage sharing many tweets relating to Dragon Age 4. One tweet stated: “Is tweeting more going to make you all speculate more or less?”. Followed by a poll with the answers “more”, “less” & “Dragon Age 4!?”

The following week, Mark Darrah teased his three Wolf-Rook books he has placed on a shelf at home.

Later on, in the month, he decided to stack each of them, prompted with the caption: “Spoiler: these are a terrible building material…”

Just last week, Mark tweeted the Wolf-Rook book once more, with the following meme: “Dear men, what is preventing you from looking like this?”

This cheeky tease encouraged Melissa Janowicz (Gameplay Designer) to join the fun and share her own Wolf-Rook book! She said: “It's an absolutely gorgeous book. I'll treasure it for life.”

Ahhh. The secrets these books could hold about Dragon Age 4’s core concepts.... And Mark Darrah is just staking them together, making book forts out of them, as you do! 😂 Maybe one day, we’ll uncover the secrets held within every page, but that day is not yet upon on.

On the same memey day, Chris Anderson, (Application Development/Publishing Support at BioWare) tweeted: “Other people are teasing things, so what the hell, here's an image that I used in something I was working on today.” With a pink image shown.

Chris and Melissa followed a Twitter conversation about pink being the “perfect colour for when you need something that screams temp.”

Basically, this pink actually has some context for the development of Dragon Age 4. ‘Temp’ means temporary textures, the first blocked out layer of a texture before actual detailed textures are added.

This can refer to many scenes or models in the early texturing phases, as art assets are still in the approval stages. On a wild, out-there whim, perhaps the team are wrapping up a trailer for a reveal? Maybe?... please?

John Epler (Narrative Director) shared his most controversial opinion of all time:

I loved the Hinterlands, but as a fan of the previous Dragon Age game’s ‘linear with freedom' approach, I appreciate John’s take on open world’s since Dragon Age: Inquisition, perhaps this will shape the way forward for future BioWare titles?

Alix Wilton Regan, voice actress of the Female British Inquisitor retweeted Autumn Witch’s poll asking if people believe the Inquisitor will return as a voiced appearance in Dragon Age 4. Alix tweeted: “C’mon #DAI Fans, you know what to do ;)”

Patrick Weekes replied to Alix’s post with an eye's emoji 👀.... I think I speak for everyone when I say, in some capacity, the Inquisitor has got to return in the next game!

In another tweet, Patrick Weekes teased potential new companions when a Twitter trend placed 5 Dragon Age characters in 6 different camps went around the platform.

When choosing their preferred camp, Patrick Weekes tweeted: “Finally, in Camp 7, it's turned into a bit of a mess, with coffee grounds spilled everywhere and the couch inexplicably on fire after a drinking game gone wrong. But that's another story.”

Of course, there’s not much to tear apart here, but we have acknowledgement of the next party members! It sounds like they’re a wild bunch already!

In early April, Mark Darrah answered a few current development tweets:

So, that’s...Splendid.

Karin Weekes (Editor) tweeted that they “got to sort/catalog/document updates to made-up languages at work today.”

Following that tweet, @ladyiolanthe asked Karin: “Do you think BioWare might ever be able to release Qunari, Dwarvish, and Elvhen lexicons in a World of Thedas Volume 3 sort of book? Or is that unlikely since they're ciphers and maybe there isn't a standardized grammatical structure, etc?”

Karin replied with: “That’s an interesting idea - I, for one, would find it a hoot! I might send out some feelers…” Any books of made-up languages I can get my hands on would be greatly appreciated!

Alain Baxter, (‘Production guy’) tweeted: “BioWare review of content today. All I can say is “Scriplet”. 😎

Apparently a ‘Scriptlet’ is an action verb. Alain is teasing premature scripts as they ‘perform their function’ So, something exciting is going down in the scripts, to be worked on in-engine. Or maybe it’s just an inside joke?

John Epler tweeted a great design message about “how 90% of ‘bad’ decisions are, in fact, the best decision at the time. For John, that will always be the camera zoomed conversations in DA: I. People didn’t like it, and asked why not just make them full scenes. But that’s not the decision they make in-house. It was 'make them simple conversations or else cut them'. Game dev is all about making the best decision you can at the time, with the resources you have .A lot of stuff you thought was weird or awkward came down to a gut call of 'this is the best I can make this and I trust it's good enough'. Sometimes we're right, sometimes not.”

Awesome words to think on, Dragon Age 4 will be amazing, I’m sure, but just remember to set your expectations right and realise everything design-wise, happens for a reason.

Shifting to other design aspects. Jos Hendricks (Senior Level Designer) tweeted:

Mike Jungbluth (Animation Director) tweeted: “Just reviewed something in game that hit THIS LEVEL! Hot damn, moments like this are what I live for.”

Both tweets are incredibly excited and telling of development for Dragon Age 4, it sounds like they’re building and prototyping an epic scene equivalent in scale to the attack at Haven scene? Perhaps, Solas destroying the Veil? Who knows, but it sounds epic, and I’m living for both dev.'s enthusiasm!

For the final tweet regarding the development side is from Åsa Roos (Principle UX Designer)

A UX designer writing about Solas? That must be for codex entries? Right? More lore on our Rebel God!

Unannounced Dragon Age Game:

In my previous March news update, I discussed brashly about the developers on Dragon Age 4 still claiming that this project has not officially been announced yet, however, The Dread Wolf Rises teaser in 2018 certainly alluded to an announcement regarding the next Dragon Age title. Following this story, we have many sources providing clarity on Dragon Age 4’s current ‘unannounced’ situation.

Patrick Weekes confirmed that they are “working on an unannounced game in the Dragon Age universe.”

Patrick said: “We would LOVE to be able to say more. We are really excited about what we’re working on. But we can’t share anything right now. Sorry!”

In April 2019, I painted this unannounced situation rather conspiratorial, I said that perhaps the Dragon Age dev’s can’t share anymore on the next game because Anthem was the next project, and EA are forcing them to not speak on Dragon Age. In an attempt to maintain the crowd by not letting BioWare developers regard Dragon Age 4 as the next working project in the works.

However, I don’t think it’s that deep. I think the developers are just under an NDA, and literally can’t speak about the game.

In Episode 121 of the Anthem-based ‘Freelancer Codex’ Podcast - as a guest, Melissa Janowicz shared that the developers on the secret Dragon Age team cannot talk about the next game, in fact, they can barely talk about the contents of The Dread Wolf Rises teaser trailer.

Chris Anderson also emphasised this same point in a tweet:

As a side not, someone asked Chris why not lie and come up with fake answers to fool the fans, and Chris said: “That can, unfortunately, get me in nearly as much trouble!”

Which shows the validity and value in BioWare developer tweets. The developers can’t just lie about the project either. Which honestly helps someone like me out.

As we know, a game is coming, yet it’s still is very much unannounced, probably because as Jason Schreier reported in 2018, Dragon Age 4 is going to change at least 5 times in the next two years, perhaps BioWare don’t want to show us anything because they don’t want to set anything in stone, or show gameplay that is not representative of the final game.

But that doesn’t extend to a CGI trailer, or a full title drop, Maker knows that would be amazing, and is within the realm of possibility.

New Lore/Fun:

We have some new lore, and other fun things I wanted to share.

Dragon Age Comic Writer, Nunzio DeFillipis talked HUGELY about the red lyrium idol and what was originally planned for their comics.

Nunzio recently mentioned in the Unofficial Bioware Forums that the comic characters from Deception were originally chasing the red lyrium idol.

Nunzio stated that the original plan for the comics would've had the characters retrieve the red lyrium idol. Only to have Solas take it back. Eluding to the idol's planned whereabouts before the plot changed since Joplin's cancellation and BioWare's shift regarding this idol in the comics.

Does this still mean that the location of the red lyrium idol is most likely in the hands of Solas and might only be discovered in Dragon Age 4? Or does the next protagonist have a shot at retrieving the idol before Solas finds it?

It seems like a bummer that the original comic idea was scrapped and the writers were forced to change narrative direction regarding this particular idol.

As a funny tweet I saw. Emily (Domino) Talyor tweeted using her overheard in the office hashtag:

BioWare dev’s can’t even tell their kids, folks.

And, regarding the Fuzzy Freaks livestream. Patrick Weekes’s response to my question, asking how does Solas kill dwarves in their sleep if they have no connection to the Fade, was “very effectively.” This will be a mystery I will personally be investigating when we have our hands on the game.

Considering it was really fun for those who watched the Fuzzy Freaks livestream, I’m going to share other silly takeaways:

Patrick Weekes doing a New York accent for the Carta Dwarf is amazing!

“DREAD DUMBASS” - is a jokey dialogue option that Karen Weekes scribbled notes for future reference.

Patrick likes soft romances and happy endings! IRONICALLY.

Patrick’s style of writing is less high fantasy and more modern.

@DrunkDalish, Co-founder of Dragon Age Day interviewed both Karen and Patrick Weekes. As a lover of Dragon Age lore, these interviews reveal so many loving tidbits that you should read for yourself. However, something I noted that was very significant regarding the future is based on Masked Empire’s ending. So, spoilers for that, but Felassan’s fate isn’t what it seems. Perhaps this elf could come back in the future if needed.

Wellbeing:

And, we come to the last topic, this one is centred on the BioWare staff’s wellbeing. Last year, there was a Kotaku article revealing the crunch and working conditions at BW, there was a lot of worry and confusion in the air that the people working on these games were struggling mentally because of senior management and many other reasons. With that in mind, I’m dedicating a section in these news updates to the wellbeing of the developers, any signs/tweets of positivity and hope will be shared in an effort to see if there has been any change in the BioWare offices since Anthem’s release.

It seems like things are going pretty well and people seem happy and optimistic about the next Dragon Age.

If there are any major updates to a Dragon Age 4 tease at EA Play, I'll be sure to make an update video, but otherwise, be sure to join our livestream as see for ourselves what waits us this EA Play.

Let me know your thoughts down below, what do you think about a potential EA Play teaser, where are your expectations at?

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pianosmasher · 4 years ago

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I find it... interesting that Resident Evil 8, subtitled Village, is the first to introduce vampires and werewolves to the series. Up until that point, the series had always been about biological weapons, mainly of the viral kind. As a Dracula fan, I immediately pledged myself to catch all the way up on the series in anticipation for VIII after seeing the announcement trailer in June 2020. I basically didn’t know anything about the series, as I was too young for M-rated games during its heyday (at least by my parents’ standards) and had no older cousins or siblings who’d introduce me. I didn’t even make the pandemic connection at first. All I was thinking of was how my new PS4, bought with the money I’d originally saved to go see my mom in Tennessee one last time, was slowly becoming my new favorite thing. It’d gotten my roommate through April with The Last of Us Remastered and it got me through May with Horizon: Zero Dawn. If I’m gonna make the switch from Nintendo to Sony, I may as well get to know Resident Evil starting in June.

The pandemic parallels came in much later. I’m playing them in release order, and it’s not until the second game that the characters have the time and awareness to consider synthesizing a vaccine. The characters in the first game have to figure out what’s going on as it’s happening to them, and it’s important to remember that zombies came back into popularity due to the efforts of that first game, meaning the exact nature of the threat would have come off more ambiguous at the time. The game’s Japanese title, Biohazard, holds the clue: we’ve scarred an ecosystem, and the human damage may be beyond repair. All you can do is try to save all the people who don’t deserve to be there as it happens.

Starting in the second game, I'd hear the characters talk about vaccines. I myself will reach full vaccination status tomorrow afternoon, and here I am playing games with characters who’ve killed just to get close to making one. The difference between our viruses in theirs is that we actually have some hope of curing ours, as in the world of Resident Evil, everything seems unstoppable. Momentum never seems to end once it’s been picked up - not for the virus, not for the destruction, and certainly not for human greed. The player is supposed to survive and nothing more, not live and thrive but to continuously struggle, lose, and sacrifice as they make their way through an environment that is either mastered or deadly to the touch. “Don’t get too close,” the special operatives say to their fellow agents. Resident Evil offers the power fantasy of knowing how to handle something impossible through trial and error. The horror is overcome by learning to live with it.

At least that’s how the first three games work. Starting with the fourth, all the atmosphere, pacing, and level design keep their levels of quality, but instead serve a much more direct fantasy of power in the form of a dread thriller with a pint of action thrown in for good measure. It’s clear that our relationship with the environment had changed by the time it was released. RE4 became the blueprint for third-person shooters, but funnily enough, going back to it reveals that it’s everything around the shooter that allows the main mechanic to shine that deep into the spotlight. The characters, for instance: Leon, now a professional, is infected with the game’s new virus himself early on, and he begins to have nightmares about what it might be doing to his body. If you’ve just come off playing through Leon’s first day as a cop in RE2, this is terrifying. He is practically a special agent at this point, meaning he’s accomplished quite a lot since the last game, so his plot armor can’t exactly be thick. Are we gonna see a character in Resident Evil, a game requiring a lot of death at first, actually die in canon?

More importantly: what does he do now that he has the virus? Is he gonna be okay? Am I hitting myself too close to home? Or is this the only piece of media that feels relevant to me anymore?

Resident Evil 5 takes place in Africa, and despite semiplausible claims of racism actually ends up being a staunchly anti-colonial parable about overcoming a world of fear. Chris Redfield finally lets go of fear when he looks over at Jill Valentine and Sheva Alomar, the two women who have now saved his life too many times to count. RE5 was built for co-op play, and its story is based around the vulnerability and necessity of partnership. It’s not defeating the big bad in a giant volcano that helps Chris live uninhibited. It’s his support network, however small it may be. (There’s even a woman of color in it). The characters of RE have always been at the forefront of the experience, but 5 at least tries to make it clear that there really are people worth fighting for out there, and ten times out of ten, you can spot them as the ones who’re fighting right there with you.

RE6 picks up on this theme of connection, gets high on nostalgia, and plays fast and loose with tone in a sort of victory lap. I’m not finished with it but it isn’t great so far. I also haven’t touched RE7, Code: Veronica, or Zero, as I want to finish those last two spinoffs before I move on to another phase of the mainline titles. And all the while, all my gaming channels are covering RE:Village without really covering it at all. I know that Capcom is bound to have some scientific explanation as to why vampires and werewolves made their debut in the series with this game, as it’d been in development for three years prior to its announcement, an echo of the past finally heard. But still, even if we’re grading on a curve, context is context. How wild is it that a year and change after the pandemic began, a game series known for its bio-weapons turns a gothic corner and drops its original moniker? Indeed, RE:Village is also the first not to have “biohazard” on any release title anywhere, regardless of region. In truth, I can’t quite blame the publications - I wouldn’t have noticed if I didn’t sit down to write this tonight.

Would I have boarded that hype train in June if the game had kept its chemical warfare? The Last of Us: Part II, another franchise brought to me by Sony, also had its virus and pandemic in the foreground, and that’s a top ten game for me now given my specific experience with it. But then, Resident Evil is special. The beautifully detailed graphics, endearing character moments, atmospheric pacing, motivated sound design, and confrontational control schemes have all made it stand apart to me as a series. I really have no comparison for how these games have challenged me and made me feel during this time. I’ve watched Chris become a soldier, Claire become a mother, Leon become a hero, and Jill come back from the brink, all while underneath the heavy horrors of a natural environment turned unstoppably hostile. One way or another, I’m glad I met them.

This was the year everything in my life took off in directions that I could no longer follow or keep up with. I can’t describe to you how much I feel like I’ve lost, despite all the incredibly important personal work I have done behind the scenes. I realize now that there are some changes that simply can’t be stopped or unchanged, only survived, endured, and adapted to. It’s taught me that we hardly ever seek change - it seeks us, and we are offered the task to accept it or defend against it. There’s something that feels right about playing these games at this time, of that I’m sure. I find it interesting that, by the time I get to RE:Village, the franchise itself will have changed into something quite different. But with each new game I’ve crossed off my list, RE has earned more and more of my trust as a series that knows all too well how changes come and go. Hopefully I will change right along with it.

#Ross writes things #resident evil #a crooked line of growth is still proof that you're growing #isn't that what Darwin tried to say?

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weekendwarriorblog · 4 years ago

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The Weekend Warrior 5/7/21: WRATH OF MAN, HERE TODAY, THE UNTHINKABLE, MONSTER, THE WATER MAN and More

It’s a new month, and I guess going by previous years pre-COVID, this weekend would normally be the start of summer. This year, we’re instead getting a summer with a lot of movies that would normally be dumped into April or February or some other uneventful month. That doesn’t mean that there aren’t or won’t be any good movies, but really, there’s nothing that feels like a summer movie until A Quiet Place Part II and Disney’s Cruella open on Memorial Day weekend.

There’s been lots of great developments, though, including the Alamo Drafthouse in Brooklyn reopening this Friday and then in a few short weeks, theaters may be allowed to be open with no capacity rules although social distancing and masks will probably still be in place. Believe me, it’s been a confusing week as the city that got used to being on the backburner when it comes to reopenings, especially with movie theaters, is now dealing with arguing politicians competing to see who could throw open the then most doors fastest. It’s actually pretty embarrassing.

That aside, this week’s The Weekend Warrior column is brought to you by the new album “Coral Island” from Liverpool band The Coral, which I’ve decided to listen to on loop until I finish this column, because it’s taking me so long to get through it. (Eventually, I switched to Teenage Fanclub’s “Endless Arcade,” since I hadn’t had a chance to listen to it yet…. And to an old standby, Royal Blood, with their own excellent new album, “Typhoons.” At least the record business seems to know it’s the summer!)

Before we get to this week’s new movies, a couple tidbits. First of all, I’m thrilled that my friends Larissa Lam and Baldwin Chiu’s documentary FAR EAST DEEP SOUTH can finally be seen by the entire world, or at least the United States. It debuted on PBS World Channel on Tuesday night as part of the “America ReFramed” series, but for the entire month of May until June 3, you can watch it On Demand HERE, and that is huge! (There will be other ways to see it that you can read about here.)

This is an amazing MUST-SEE doc that looks into the little-known Chinese communities that took root in Mississippi in the early 20th Century and how they became such a huge part of that area with their markets, also bonding with the African-American communities that were similarly dealing with racism from the typically white post-Civil War South. It’s not just a history lesson, and it’s an incredibly moving story about a family trying to find its roots in the most unexpected places. There was a good reason why the couple’s short “Finding Cleveland” won the Oxford Film Festival while I was on the jury that year, and Far East Deep South similarly won an award there last year after its World Premiere at Cinequest was almost scuppered by COVID. It’s amazing how much more relevant and important this film has become since I first saw it last year, since both Asians and African-Americans are dealing with serious racial issues, and this movie shows that more than anything, they should be working to boost each other rather than fighting. Do check it out On Demand this month if you get a chance!

Another musician making movies is Mr. Dave Grohl of the Foo Fighters. I mentioned his documentary WHAT DRIVES US last week, but I actually only got to watch it on Thursday, and like his previous film Studio City and HBO mini-series, Sonic Highways, it’s a fantastic look at the music biz, this time through a variety of artists who began their careers by piling into vans and driving around the country. That is, except Lars Ulrich from Metallica, who mentions that the band was never so small or indie that they didn’t have a bus. But Grohl has used his vast connections to bring in a lot of great musicians including The Edge from U2, Flea from the Red Hot Chili Peppers, and more, making this a very entertaining movie both for fans of the various bands but also live music fans in general. I gotta admit that as much as I loved What Drives Us, it did bring me down a bit since it’s been almost 14 months since I’ve seen any live music, and I really miss it. This is now streaming on The Coda Collection, which you can subscribe to through Amazon Prime Video.

Guy Ritchie is back with his latest movie, WRATH OF MAN (Miramax/MGM), which reunites him with Jason Statham for the first time since 2007’s Revolver, I believe. Statham plays the enigmatic Paul “H” Hill who works at cash truck company Fortico, responsible for moving hundreds of million dollars around Los Angeles each week. Fortico has recently been hit by a lethal robbery, and H’s team soon learn that there’s a lot more to their new coworker, who happens to be looking for revenge against the man who murdered his son.

(Unfortunately, reviews for the movie are embargoed until Thursday at 6pm, so I can’t tell you whether it’s any good or not. Until Thursday night. Sorry!)

But I will talk about the movie’s box office prospects, because why not? Ritchie’s last movie, The Gentlemen, opened in January 2020, during the “before times,” with $10.6 million, but that was more of a classic Ritchie ensemble crime-comedy. Wrath of Man is more of the type of movie Statham has been making over the past few years, a cross between a revenge thriller and a heist flick. In fact, Statham has done a pretty good job creating his own brand through a variety of action-thrillers as well as a number of franchises including “The Transporter” movies, “The Expendables,” and eventually joining the “Fast and the Furious” franchise as Deckard Shaw with Furious 7 in 2017. Statham then went off to make Hobbs and Shaw with Dwayne Johnson, which didn’t do bad with $174 million. Before that, Statham starred in The Meg, a summer shark attack movie that grossed $145 million. Statham going back to help his old mate i.e. the director that gave Statham his start is pretty huge.

But as I said earlier, those were all in the “before times” and with the box office the way it is, it’s hard to imagine that the exciting reunion of Statham and Ritchie can open with more than $10 million but maybe closer to $8 million, because MGM/UA just doesn’t have the marketing clout of a Warner Bros. or Universal. Even so, that should be enough to be #1 this weekend as both Mortal Kombat and Demon Slayer continue to fall away. Unfortunately, if the movie *is* any good -- and I can’t tell you one way or another -- then by the time reviews hit, people will already have other plans for the weekend than to go see the movie. So yeah, that’s pretty dumb on the part of MGM, huh?

UPDATE: MGM is putting the movie into 2,876 theaters and maybe I'm being overly optimistic, because, as you'll read below, the movie IS pretty good and reviews have remained positive with the American reviews rolling in last night, still at 70% Fresh at this writing. Maybe that'll help the movie do a little better, maybe as much as $9 million, although I'll probably owe MGM an apology if it cracks $10 million, and I don't think it will.

Mini-Review: If you’ve seen the trailer for Wrath of Man, you might go into Guy Ritchie’s latest thinking you know what to expect, because it’s sure being sold as another typical Jason Statham revenge thriller. Don’t be fooled by the marketing, the movie really is Ritchie’s chance to make his own version of Heat, an L.A. heist movie that owes as much to Rashomon as another movie being released this week.

Wrath of Man begins with the heist of an armored truck that turns deadly with the wanton murder of a couple guards. From there, you might think we know where things are going when Statham’s “H” company whose truck was hit, and on his first day, he stops a similar heist by killing the truck’s attackers. H is immediately the hero of the company, although he still has quite a few suspicious coworkers and the feeling is quite mutual. Ritchie’s film then slips into the second episodic chapter which goes back five months to that initial heist where we learn that Statham’s son was killed by being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

I don’t want to go too much deeper into how the movie and story play out, because like The Gentlemen and some of Ritchie’s more intricate films, there’s a lot that purposefully isn’t made very apparent at the beginning. To many, this movie will be seen as even more macho than most of Ritchie's films, to the point where even the only woman guard, Dana, being just as macho as the men. As the movie begins, there’s a lot of joke-cracking and crotch-grabbing, all while Statham’s character silently observes and only acts when necessary.

The film’s shift to more of a classic Ritchie ensemble does slowly take place, but by the third chapter, it shifts to the group perpetrating the cash truck heists with an “inside person,” taking the movie to yet another place that makes it more obvious that this is Ritchie’s attempt at delving into the L.A. heist genre that other filmmakers have done so well.

Oddly, Statham doesn’t have too many lines, acting almost like a Terminator in his determination to right wrongs, but as always, Ritchie puts together a fantastic ensemble cast including a number of great American character actors who we rarely get to see in such great roles. I was particularly impressed with Jeffrey Donovan, who has appeared in a number of otherwise forgettable crime films this past year. The same can be said for Holt McCallany as H’s truck driver “Bullet,” but Ritchie also cast the likes of Josh Hartnett and Scott Eastwood in smaller yet still significant supporting roles, all of whom become more interesting as you start figuring out who all the players are.

Like I said, the movie is fairly macho and the few women play very small roles, but it’s how things are set-up in the first few acts to then change course and build to an absolutely amazing third act that will undoubtedly bear comparisons to Heat. And yet Wrath of Man (which is actually based on a little-seen French crime-thriller) does branch away from some of Ritchie’s standards, first of all by being far darker and even more violent with any of the wisecracking humor that pervades a lot of Ritchie’s work to counterbalance such violence disappearing once the flashbacks begin. It’s all punctuated by a fantastically tense score by Christopher Benstead, which seems a bit much at first but eventually settles into the perfect pace and tone for the action.

Despite disappearing for a good chunk of the movie, Statham is still great, basically killing everyone as his characters are wont to do, but watching how all of the different ideas come together leads to such a satisfying conclusion that one hopes those who might be put off, thinking they know where it's going due to the somewhat pathetic and obvious marketing will give it a chance to see how Ritchie has changed gears as effortlessly as he did with Aladdin a few years back.

Rating: 7.5/10

After even a longer time since he directed a movie, Billy Crystal once again takes the helm for HERE TODAY (Sony/Stage6), a movie in which he plays comedy writer Charlie Burns, whose chance encounter with Tiffany Haddish’s lounge singer, Emma Payge, leads to an unlikely friendship, as he struggles with early stage dementia.

I’ve known about this movie for over a year now, and I was pretty excited to finally get to see it, since I was such a fan of the other movies Crystal has directed, 1992’s Mr. Saturday Night and 1995’s Forget Paris, and it’s just amazing to me that he hasn’t directed a movie since.

At first, it seems like it’s the type of meet-cute we’ve seen so much in Crystal’s past filmography, but his pairing with Haddish isn’t something that might work on paper, but in fact, their comic styles mesh so perfectly together that it’s amazing that no one thought of putting them together before.

Crystal wrote the film with comic Alan Zweibel, who adapted it from his own short story “The Prize,” which refers to Haddish’s character winning Charlie in an auction for a lunch. Actually, her ex won the lunch, and she decided to use it because… free lunch! It’s a pretty simple set-up but one that allows the filmmakers to explore some of the odder things that happen in life.

Much of the movie’s humor plays upon the differences between the two characters, and how unexpected their friendship is. I can totally relate, because I have a lot of good long-time friends who most people might never expect us to be friends, but Crystal, Zweibel and Haddish pick up on that and create a movie that’s very funny but has enough other characters around the duo toa allow their characters to show how they’re just really nice people. We see that with how Charlie takes a young writer at his late night show under his wing or how Emma livens up the bat mitzvah of Charlie’s granddaughter. Oh yeah, and Haddish sings. She actually has a number of great performances in the movie, and seriously, anyone who watches this movie is gonna wanna see a smart filmmaker put Haddish in a musical immediately.

The film also acts as a truly touching tribute to Crystal’s friend, the late Robin WIlliams, who was diagnosed with the exact same type of dementia after his suicide death, and knowing that fact, makes the film even more poignant. More importantly, it doesn’t use Charlie’s condition for laughs, and for that alone, I feel like this is ten times better than that overrated Oscar winner The Father.

Here Today’s biggest problems come in the third act when it feels like the movie is starting to over-extend its welcome, even going into somewhat expected places, but it recovers from that rough third act to land a really nice ending. Crystal has always proven himself to be a really strong mainstream filmmaker (ala Rob Reiner and others) who makes crowd-pleasing movies, and it’s so nice seeing him going behind the camera for a movie that’s obviously very personal but also highly relatable.

As far as box office, I certainly have high hopes that Crystal still has an older audience of fans who might want to see him on the big screen again. I’m just not sure if this will be in more than 1,000 theaters, and though I’ve seen quite a bit of marketing, I just haven’t seen Crystal or Haddish do nearly as much in terms of getting out there that would be necessary to reach an audience that might want to venture out into movie theaters to see the movie vs. waiting until it’s on cable/streaming. There’s also Tiffany Haddish’ fanbase, and there could be some benefit for the movie coming out the same week as her new CBS show “Kids Say the Darndest Things.”

I’d love to be optimistic with this making $4 to 5 million but it’s probably more likely to be closer to $3 million especially with capacity limits still in place for most theaters and the audience generally being older.

UPDATE: Maybe I was a little too optimistic, because I enjoyed the movie so much and it will probably be closer to $1 or 1.5 million since other reviews aren't as great.

Next, we have two movies finally being released many years after their festival premieres…

The Swedish apocalyptic thriller THE UNTHINKABLE (Magnet), directed by Victor Danell, is finally being released after playing genre fests in 2018 and 2019. It stars Christoffer Nordenrot as Alex, a young piano virtuoso who ran away from home due to his abusive father Bjorn (Jesper Barkselius). Years later, he returns home for his mother’s funeral after she’s killed in a terrorist attack on Sweden. At the same, there’s a virus that’s erasing people’s memories, but Alex is still in love with Anna (Lisa Henni), the girl he had a crush on when he left, and the three of them will have to help each other face all the horrible things hitting their home at the same time.

As I was watching this movie, a lot of it felt eerily familiar to me, but I couldn’t figure out why. The more I watched it, the more I realized that I actually HAD seen the movie before. Sure enough, I saw this movie over two years ago at the “What the Fest?!” in New York two years ago, and I honestly don’t remember loving it. Still, I decided to give it a fresh look, hoping to get more out of it on second viewing.

Some of the same things bothered me on this second viewing, because it’s really hard to figure out exactly what is going on and whether the horrific events are natural, man-made or a combination of both. For some time, we get so mired into Alex’s lame relationship with Anna, and when he returns home, his conspiracy theory-driven father is busy protecting a bunker that’s being invaded by foreign military troops he thinks are Russians. We cut between these two disparate scenarios while sometimes returning to the capital of Sweden and throwing in a few big set pieces. It’s so disjointed that you feel like you’re watching a lot of random unrelated events, maybe a bit like last week’s About Endlessness -- maybe it’s a Swedish thing?

There are aspects of The Unthinkable that are quite commendable, particularly those action moments and how the mystery about what is happening develops as the film goes along. Eventually, the film does find a more consistent pace, and things start becoming a little clearer, which makes the final act better than much of what we’ve watched earlier. Even so, it’s still quite annoying how long it takes to figure out what’s going on, even on a second viewing, and for most people, that may already be far too frustrating to get through it.

Hitting Netflix on Friday over THREE years after it premiered at Sundance is music video director Anthony Mandler’s directorial debut, MONSTER (Netflix), based on the novel by Walter Dean Myers. It stars Kelvin Harrison Jr. (Waves) as Steve Harmon, a 17-year-old film student put in jail, accused of murder in a bodega robbery. His defense lawyer (Jennifer Ehle) is trying to help him be released, but he’s fighting against the odds of a judicial system that sees him as a “monster” because he was in the wrong place at the wrong time.

I have to be honest that I did go to see this at Sundance the week it premiered, and for whatever reason, I just wasn’t feeling it, so I only really caught about twenty minutes of it. Watching it now with more time and a little less weary than I usually am towards the end of Sundance, I was able to appreciate Monster more for what it is. On the surface, it’s just about Steve’s case and how what really happened unfolds before our eyes and we learn more about those around Steve and how their influence may have pulled a smart and studious young man into the criminal world that now has him in prison with much more violent life-long criminals.

We already knew that Harrison was a great actor, but Monster shows us that he was already on his way to greatness with this movie that for whatever reason got buried even as it dealt with issues that have been in the headlines almost every day since this debuted.

Mandler takes an interesting approach, both non-linear and also with blatant nods to Kurosawa’s Rashomon, which is even cited by Steve’s teacher, played by Tim Blake Nelson. Jeffrey Wright and Jennifer Hudson are decent as Steve’s parents, but they’re generally smaller and non-showy roles compared to the moments between Harrison and Ehle. Much of the film takes place in the courtroom with flashbacks showing what happened through the viewpoint of whomever is on the stand, which eventually includes Steve himself.

The way Mandler handles the material may lean more on the artiness rather than something more mainstream -- Michael B. Jordan’s Just Mercy comes to mind -- but it’s just as powerful in showing how someone like Steve can be othered by society into being a criminal. Sure, there have been other handlings of this sort of material that I thought were better films, but if you know anyone who has ever had dealings with the “justice” system and know how unfair and horrible it can be even to the innocent, then Monster will certainly strike a chord.

Also hitting Netflix this week is the new series based on Mark Millar and Frank Quitely‘s comic books, JUPITER’S LEGACY (Netflix), another kind of twist on the superhero genre ala Amazon Prime Video’s series based on Warren Ellis and Darick Robertson’s The Boys. I love the comics, and I can’t wait to finally get around to seeing Netflix’s first adaptation of a Millarworld property.

David Oyelowo makes his directorial debut with THE WATER MAN (RLJEfilms), a movie about a young boy named Gunner Boon (Lonnie Chavis), whose mother (Rosario Dawson) is battling leukemia. In an effort to cure her, Guner goes off on a journey along with a teenage girl named Jo (Amiah Miller) to find the mythical Water Man, who can provide them with a magic token that might save Gunner’s mother’s life.

I’ve interviewed Oyelowo a few times before, and I really like him a lot, so I had really high hopes for him as a director since I feel he’s just a terrific actor. Unfortunately, the material here is just not strong enough that I think even a far more experienced filmmaker could make something out of it.

Set in PIne Hills, we meet Gunner, a bright kid who loves drawing comic books, but he has trouble connecting with his father (Oyelowo), so when he has an idea that might help his sick mother, he goes off with a head-strong teen named Jo, in search of the Water Man, a summertime adventure permeated by a lot of very bad low-budget visual effects.

Honestly, I’m not even sure where to begin with where The Water Man falters, because Oyelowo has such a great cast, including Alfred Molina and Maria Bello in tiny parts. The story is a problem, as is the writing, which is just so bland and dull, that there’s really nothing in Oyelowo’s direction or any of the performances that really can salvage it. Neither of the child actors have much charisma or personality, and even Dawson’s performance, which would normally be a showstopper is repeatedly lessened by the constant cutting back to the kids. (And as someone who beat leukemia myself, I’m never a fan when cancer is depicted in movies as a death sentence rather than just another hurdle in life that needs to be overcome.)

Oyelowo himself may be one of his generation’s best actors, but he brings so little to the role of Gunner’s father, maybe to not take away from his younger star, but it hurts that he doesn’t do more to create a stronger conflict by making the character more horrible to drive Gunner away. The actual Water Man doesn’t improve things when he finally shows up, essentially talking like a pirate but not even remotely paying off.

Honestly, The Water Man seems like such a misguided venture -- Exec. Produced by Oprah, no less -- and it might have been totally forgettable if the characters didn’t keep saying the title of the movie every five minutes.

Hitting theaters Friday after a festival run is Tran Quoc Bao’s action-comedy THE PAPER TIGERS (WELL GO USA), starring ALain Uy, Ron Yuan and Mikel Shannon Jenkins as martial artists once known as “the three tigers but now middle-aged men must set aside old grudges and dad duties to avenge the murder of their teacher. I’ve had a screener of this since last summer when it played at Fantasia Festival in Montreal, and I just never got around to watching it, but if I’m able to squeeze it in before the weekend, check back here for my review.

Streaming on Shudder this Friday is Ryan Kruger's South African comedy-thriller FRIED BARRY (Shudder), starring Gary Green as Barry, a violent street junkie who is abducted by aliens who take over his body in order to… well, actually… they do a lot of drugs, have a lot of sex and other craziness. It’s a pretty strange and bizarre movie that reminds me a little of movies like a lower-fi Under the Skin or Beyond the Black Rainbow, and much of it is driven by the insane and unique performance by Green and the odd characters he encounters that I think will find its fans for sure, but it will definitely be for a very select audience of genre festival fans, as this is by no means a mainstream genre film.

Speaking of which, another movie out this week which I wasn’t allowed to see in advance is Gia Coppola’s MAINSTREAM (IFC Films), starring Maya Hawke as a young woman seeking internet stardom by making YouTube videos with a charismatic stranger, played by Andrew Garfield, until “the dark side of viral celebrity threatens to ruin them both.” Yup, it’s one of THOSE movies. It also stars Nat Wolff, Jason Schwartzman and Johnny Knoxville, but I haven’t heard anything good about it, and I’m not sure my curiosity is piqued enough to spend any of my own personal money to check it out.

Hitting Amazon on Friday is the doc THE BOY FROM MEDELLIN (Amazon) from Matthew Heineman (City of Ghosts, Cartel Land), a portrait of musical superstar J. Balvin, as he prepares for a massive sold-out stadium show in his hometown of Medellin, Colombia, which is hindered by the growing civil unrest in the area.

Lots of other movies this week, but a few that i just wasn’t able to get to this week, including:

ABOVE SUSPICION (Lionsgate) INITIATION (Saban Films) ENFANT TERRIBLE (Dark Star Pictures) QUEEN MARIE (Samuel Goldwyn Films) SILO (Oscilloscope) CITIZEN PENN (Discovery+)

That’s it for this week. Next week, Chris Rock and Samuel L. Jackson star in SPIRAL: FROM THE BOOK OF SAW (Lionsgate) and Angelina Jolie returns for the thriller THOSE WHO WISH ME DEAD (New Line) and Timur Bekmambetov’s thriller, PROFILE (Focus Features). That’s right. This will be the first weekend in over a year where we’ll have three or maybe even four new wide releases.

#TheWeekendWarrior #Movies #Reviews #WrathOfMan #HereToday #Monster #The Unthinkable #TheWaterMan

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