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hhhecates · 4 years ago

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New Jujutsu Kaisen hc because I like to suffer and I got this idea after my sign language inumaki hc.

Okay, so... we all know that in animes there's usually that one really stoic and aloof character whose friends are complete fucking idiots and they just have to deal with them, so most of the times they are just annoyed as fuck?? (Yes, I am completely using fushiguro, nobara and itadori's friendship dynamics as a reference)

And we also know that at some point, maybe because faced with their past or because they actually risked to lose their friends, there's that one scene when the stoic character looks at their two dumbass friends arguing over something trivial and they are staring at them from the sidelines,,, and suddenly they just burst into this soft precious smile with rosy cheeks because they realize how much they care for these two idiots even if they drive them crazy?? And everyone looks back at the stoic character completely fucking baffled because what??? They had never seen them smile before and it's just so heartwarming??

But now, just consider sarcastic and annoying reader, soft spoken and polite to the point of mockery towards higher ups and loud and stubbornly undaunted when crossed. Reader is basically the pissy intj of the situation who is halfway between self-deprecating and god complex (gojo probably raised them lol, let's be real). And contrary to the stoic character, who's a little tsundere sometimes?? and who doesn't want to admit they care, intj reader just doesn't care. They don't want to. They don't know if it's worth it and are probably afraid that it's not.

Imagine them being a second year, and they're infamous because as much as you'd like to hate them (and prob a lot of people do) their "friends" really can't. Because reader is all about gratuitous sarcasm and soiled stubbornness that makes you roll your eyes, but they are also the first one to believe in Maki with everything they have got when she talks about her family history, they're the one that silence harshly the petty remarks of the Zenin whenever the most important families in Jujutsu meet, and no, it's not because they think maki can't fight her own battles, they'd never dare open their mouth to defend her because they know maki's own actions and achievements speak much louder, but they will never tolerate the Zenin's disrespect towards her.

They are the one that secretly buy books about sign language to learn it for inumaki, and before that they had an evergrowing list of his onigiri vocabulary on the noteapp of their phone. They're the ones that stay to the dorms with Panda when the others go get snacks because Panda can't really go out on their own, and reader always brushes it off by saying that they don't like going out anyways. They're the one that firstly greeted Yuuta with a half smile, tired but not forced nor fake, and called Rika a "pretty girl" because while she might have looked "just so scary", reader knew better than to dismiss the little girl still behind that "scary" appearance.

Reader is the one that exasperatedly yells at fushiguro, bite in their voice but none in their words, when they tell him that his thoughts and concerns are real and valid. They are the one that huff at itadori's sulking about sukuna and flick his forehead, then reassuring him not to have regrets for wanting to save people's lives when he ate that damn finger and that "whatever stupid thing you do, your senpais will have your back". Reader is the one that tries out new bakeries for Nobara in their free time so that she doesn't have to visit every single one in order to find Saori, and then brings her back her favourite pastries. And they're still the one that when gojo whines loudly, halfway between truly joking and self-deprecating, sigh at him and say in a joking tone "You might be standing alone as the strongest, but that doesn't mean that you always need to stand alone, you know that right?".

And it's so frustrating, because if any of the people at Jujutsu High was to be asked to describe reader, probably that would still leave every single one of them with their mouth hanging open in search of words, because they are annoyingly stubborn and loud, probably a little bit pretentious too, they're also soft and caring and attentive.

But they also know nothing more, nothing else about them. So what the fuck are they supposed to say??

Now, imagine that it all comes tumbling down one day, the elders come to Tokyo Jujutsu High to take reader with them (I imagine reader being like part of one of the main families, not the main threes, maybe a really important one just for the politics?? And the kind that just marries off their children to the three main families in exchange of retaining a high position, and like reader wasn't even born into it, they were adopted because they had like a really strong cursed technique or smth, that's why people from Jujutsu High didn't know who they were, cause they kept their old surname and basically escaped from their old life, cause fuck it, if the elders want them just to be someone's spouse, they are gonna be petty like that and become one of the best sorcerers instead).

For the first time they see reader scared out of their fucking mind, cause no, they don't want for their friends and their teacher to see them like this, to get their past thrown back at their face and drag everyone down with them. It makes them feel weak and helpless, and they fucking despise it.

But ofc no one there is gonna have any of the elders shit, gojo in the first place, and the second years too, boi they are so pissed, the first years just throw all caution towards the elders outta the window, cause they don't care.

They just refuse to hand reader over like they're not their own person.

And let's say they manage to send the elders back empty handed (for now at least, cause yes, I have more hc). But everyone if so fucking shocked??? And naturally now they see reader in a completely different light. And they treat them differently too.

And of course reader notices, how could they not, and they feel so disgusted cause they don't want their pity, they don't need it, they had spent already enough time pitying themselves.

But the thing is that they aren't acting like this out of pity, they don't pity reader, quite the opposite, they just see them as stronger. Because now they saw that reader too has weaknesses and insecurities, and all those things that reader calls disgusting and tries to hide, all those things that make reader agonizingly human. All those things that make them even more of a precious and admirable friend in everyone's eyes.

And so like, imagine that reader has closed themselves off in their dorm room, and no one is allowed in. They come out just late at night to take something to eat, but this time, they find everyone there in the kitchen/living room or whatever, and when they see reader coming all of them start stumbling on their words: the first years and their calls of "senpai! Please don't go back!" fushiguro is there too, and even maki looks worried, inumaki is weirdly serious, yūta visibly wants to speak but can't seem to find the right words and gojo sensei is there too, trying to silence everyone because of course, he is the teacher so "I need to be the first talking!".

And reader is just there, standing and watching all the people they care about the most argue and stutter. And it's a whole fucking mess, but it's okay, because reader is a bit of a mess too, and afterall who isn't?

And suddenly they all turn around to look back at reader because they be on the floor laughing their ass off at the scene, and then they stop laughing and look back at them with the biggest and yet softest smile ever.

And they take everyone's breath away, not because they had never seen reader smiling or laughing, they have, they do it plenty of times, but it's never like this. It's never this happy.

And it's in that moment that reader understands. They see it, and it's as clear as a day. They want to care. They care so fucking much. Because them, all of them, they are worth it.

Wheew, this turned out to be longer than expected,,, I’m so sorry shsjsksk. Also, thank you SO much for everyone who read, commented or liked my previous headcanon about inumaki knowing sign language, I really didn’t think anyone would read it, I just wrote it for shit and giggles but and now I don’t know how to respond???Also maybe I’ll be posting more of these, like a series with this reader? Yeah, I really can’t keep my mouth shut so lol.

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tutuandscoot · 2 years ago

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The moment u first discovered VM and the moment you fell in love with them .

First of all.. I’m sorry this has been in my asks for so long at this point but I’m getting to it now.

Ok.. settle in folks. 🍿

The IE SD in PYC was the first time I took notice of them. I had seen clips of stuff from Vancouver and Sochi but this was the first real moment. I’ve said in another post there were fluff pieces and lead up stuff while the whole olys were on and I can’t remember exactly now but I probs saw something before the actual event. But that SD was the first full program I watched of theirs.

Ok, the moment I fell in love. I can’t really say I have en exact moment that fits that statement. I did immediately fall in love with their dancing, but as far as a non skating moment, the following is when I thought there’s definitely something different about them:

My thoughts upon seeing this:

On a small level: Wow that’s very coupley

I’m honestly not lying when I say I never did believe, or think of them as anything other than platonic. I don’t judge anyone for thinking that there was or they did upon seeing something like this. Idk, I think I just see things a bit differently in general. I say this seems ‘coupley’ because upon first glance they just seem so close and physically familiar with each other- not strictly in a ‘dance partner’ sense the way I see most dance partners. On the offical feed for the FD from PYC during the warm up the commentator says how VM have the handle on being the “couple”. As ice dancers that’s what they are, that’s what they present as, that’s what they make you believe. While I do think there’s some accuracy to that, I don’t like how it pigeon holes them. I think they portray that energy more in certain programs than others- and not just in their programs but in creating the whole aura of their ‘package’ for that season or program. For both programs this season I would say definitely they created that “couple” energy- and I would guess that’s a very easy state for them to flow into and out of with each other when they need or want to- it’s very natural for them (especially later on in their career), they aren’t faking anything- something like this is not a matter of choreography or something they practiced as part of their exit. You can tell that because it’s clearly their natural personalities shining through, that along with being after a skate that good and being so excited, a fake af coupley exit from the ice is literally the last thing on their minds- also there are dozens of times they exit all cuddly and close- almost all the time tbh. For the previous season, there was still a bit of that coupleyness but more so; in the same FD commentary as comparison they say VM’s ‘rivals’ are more so an ‘entity’- two becoming one. I’m not disputing that label with that team but this isn’t about them, and I feel TS just as honestly portray that two-becoming-one aura in and around something like Latch. It’s a merge of the coupleyness as in a relationship and two souls becoming one to create this art. It’s a subtle difference but it’s quite obvious at least to me.

I think the coupleyness comes easy to them because they just have so much natural chemistry that so few- certainly no other ID team I’ve ever seen has. They have immense affection for each other and probably on some level do find each other attractive, and as they matured it became very natural for them to slip in and out of that, not only on the ice but as I said in the headspace they are in surrounding the direction of their program/s for the season. We have to remember that they are dancers. Dance is an art form and when it’s done by those at the highest level (not for fun after-school dance lessons. Professionals) who literally live and breath it, they are spending a huge amount of time in a state that’s not fully ‘normal human’ behaviour. They are spending a lot of time in touch with different part of themselves where they have to abandon human insecurities and norms to inhabit the tone/story of each dance, and are allowed to interact with each other in a way that’s different to real life. Spending so much time in it, being so familiar and feeling so safe with each other can easily flow in and out of performance/practice and returning/ resetting to normal. I equate it a little bit the idea of method acting. I’m not saying TS are at all method actors, but spending so much time everyday in the headspace of, let’s say, their characters from MR, yes, they can and it’s very important for them to switch off and leave it behind to relax at the end of the day, but that movement and spirit does remain within you a bit until you move on to new chore/storyline’s etc.. (this was just a little side bar, I’ll go into more detail on this in future posts).

The main thing I thought, and the reason I fell in love with them: they are really different to anyone else, really genuine, unique, special. In this moment I felt that together they were in service to their art and that’s (part of) what allows this kind on public intimacy that could be seen as romantic, but to me instinctually I felt them as artists who’s physical relationship is comprised of trust in moving together.

More than anything from those Olympics, this was the moment that caught my eye and made me think that they were different- at the time I wasn’t completely sure of what level.

The initial feels and thoughts I had, which I continue to maintain and view them of having this characteristic (IMO) (which I’ve mentioned a few times but always struggle to find the words for so I’m just gonna say it blatantly this time and then explain my way out of it): He is very in charge of her. Not in a controlling way, not in valuing her as less than he way… in a way that is possible through unwavering trust, comfort, maturity, peace with each other, love, affection and care. It’s in a way in which it feels (to me) that Tessa is so safe in his arms, safe with him leading and somewhat controlling her movements even when they aren’t actually dancing. Like I said earlier, none of this is deliberate, planned, choreographed. It’s just how they are naturally or by habit, and if you’ve watched enough of them these are all behavioural traits they display all the time. This is all completely unconscious in the moment and as a result of familiarity.

The way he passes her left hand into his, after already switching from normal, standard dance hold into their special hand hold which only they do. He pulls her a little closer so he can wrap his arm around her shoulder and neck so he now has hold of her so securely in a way that she can’t really leave this situation. Before he does that though, T pulls her ponytail over her shoulder, again, completely unconsciously- not a deliberate thought to do that, maybe her back was sweaty and her hair was sticking a bit, idk, but none the less she does. Once he’s holding her she shuts her eyes and she holds onto his arm to be even closer and cuddlier while he whispers to her.. not that anyone would be able to hear if he didn’t get that close, but none the less he makes a point of being that close cause they were truly only words for her to hear. I have no place in assuming what was said but knowing afterwards that Scott made a point of saying how T was the strength for him that day, if I was to satisfy my own curiosity and given the body language I like to think it was something along the lines of “you did so well T/ you freaking rockstar/ I’m so proud of you/ that was so fun/ that’s my girl that was so good”. Whatever was said is followed by three big pats NOT on her boob you creeps chill the fuck out and she clearly says “thank you” (or maybe ‘you too’ but I’m confident it’s ‘thank you’). What makes me think he said something like the above is the way she kinda shyly drops her head as she says ‘thank you’, you know cause they are just such cheerleaders for each other and always say the sweetest things to each other so I just know it was something so incredibly kind and positively affirming (English??) and even though they would hear it from each other all the time how wonderful they are it is still such a lovely thing to hear and I imagine they would never get tired of being so proud of the other 🥲 (or she was just out of breathe- probably that but I like the first theory 😚). Here’s the really intimate part for me: As said before she (unconsciously/not deliberately) decides to put her pony tail over her shoulder for whatever reason, but as they finish their little cuddle, he takes her pony tail off her shoulder and drapes it back behind her, before one of his classic little neck/base of her skull squeezes (😵‍💫🫠🥴). AGAIN (cause I cbf with someone coming after me for misreading the situation/claiming it’s rehearsed or telling me not to see it as intimacy coz it’s not deliberate I’ll make the point again).. ITS NOT DELIBERATE. Which is exactly what makes all of it sooo intimate. That they are just naturally like this. But now that we have accepted that it is not deliberate and we can put that aside, can we just appreciate the intimacy for a moment in that she decided she wanted her pony tail over her shoulder, but he decides he wants it on her back and she doesn’t put it back on her shoulder after, so like it’s just so intimate that even with these tiny things that over 20 years have become so comfortable and natural and just a lovely part of their unique intimacy that she’s is perfectly comfortable with letting him *decide things like wrapping her into an almost choke hold kinda cuddle and choosing where her hair will go and being gently squeezed around the base of her neck at frequently random intervals as a way of being shown affection and delicacy is just a lot to see as your first non-skating introduction to the stunning anomaly that is VIRTUEMOIR 🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯.

But she doesn’t at all want to leave the situation. She leans into him and indulges in that embrace and those sweet words of admiration. That thing I said about him being ‘in charge’ (or control) of her, is obviously a tricky word to use because of the implications it can have- so I probably shouldn’t use it but I like it in that once you know about them; their history, longevity.. I see in charge/control first from my perspective as what trusting of a partnership they clearly have and so clearly embodying the roles of S being the leader in the skating/dancing part of a man/woman partnership- this without knowing anything about them-just based on first impressions, but after that knowing more about them you see it in their personalities and all that trust built up produces the opportunity for so much comfort and (in T’s pov, and I guess mine as well being a girl I relate to her and how she is treated in this partnership) being ok with being lead and guided coz it’s exactly what happens when they dance- so it feels so natural. Without pretending to be a body language expert and really just going off my own eyes and emotions in watching this moment.. it’s so clearly a ‘coupleyness’ beyond simply friends or skating/dance partners or yes even lovers. It’s an intimacy I’d never seen before and my true, honest, first opinion of it from me as a dancer who at this time I’m my life specifically I was working very intimately with a partner was something I recognised as a closeness born out of commitment and abandon to their craft which they share a love for on such a deep, emotional level which has extended into their interactions together as best friends who share a more complex love then really anyone including them can comprehend.

So I think that’s why I fell in love with them; the dancing- not just skating, DANCING on ice like I’d never seen before along with a connection to their craft and each other I didn’t think was actually possible- especially not in public on the worlds biggest stage- this kind of intimacy I could only imagine in the seclusion of a quiet studio.. which for that matter, is 100% where the depths of their intimacy existed- in a place none of us will ever get to see and is only for them to share- those 6am mornings in a crappy hockey rink where they could say or feel anything was where the foundations of all this stemmed from- we only get to see the surface layer and if this layer is what produced such a deep fascination for them in so many of us just imagine the depth of understanding they have for their connection together. All that work to understand this person they would create moving art with at the highest athletic level we will ever see.

#omg that was longer then it probably should’ve been #lol imagine if I just answered this ask by saying ‘this’ then posting the gifs..#I’d probably have time for a social life hahahahahahaha #yeh nah tho this is a big fave moments and I obvs have lots of thinky thoughts about it #it’s a very nice moment which like I said as an intro to VM in a bit of a mind fuck

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biisexualemma · 4 years ago

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pretend. oscar diaz

word count: 1396

warnings: swearing and brief mention of sex and i oop-

requested: hi!! im in love with your writing!!🤍🤍 you're so talented!! you can totally ignore this if it's a terrible idea lol but could you write a situation where the reader and spooky have to pretend to date and one of them develops real feelings. dw if you don't want to do this, im looking forward to reading all of your future works! 💞 💞

hey i adore your spooky imagines😍🥰 could i pls ask for an imagine where they're fake dating? cliche i know but i love me some spooky where he catches feelings without even realising it🥺 thank you so much!!💖💖

hey could you do an imagine with spooky where he and the reader are fake dating for some reason and they fall for each other? ty!! :)

a/n: so many requested this so i put ‘em all into one imagine bc they’re all the same request hehe but thank u! probs will do a part two because i have more to write but this was already long enough and i just like the suspense of it all hahaha oop

pt.2 / pt.3

masterlist

"i don't like it," your best friend wore a concerned frown on her face. you shrugged. "and i don't support it."

"you don't have to," you rolled your eyes. "it's not like anyone will get hurt, it's just pretend."

"you say that now," she crossed her arms over her chest. "you used to crush pretty hard on him and i don't want you to get seriously invested, for him to break your heart."

"i won't," you stressed. "it's not like that, i'm doing him a favour," she didn't look too convinced but she couldn't do much to change your mind at this point. "besides, it's just for a few weeks."

she hummed, unconvinced. "come on! you like oscar, i don't know what your problem is?"

"you don't have to convince me of anything, this is your business," she shrugged. you felt a little hurt by her comment. you didn't talk about it again all night. you didn't like not agreeing with her about anything. it was unsettling.

you laughed at something your friend had said, sipping the alcohol from the cup in your hand. "i never said that!" you gawked.

he only let out a chuckle. "you were drunk! how you gonna remember what you said and what you didn't?" he teased, laughing with you as you rolled your eyes.

your eyes moved across the party to where oscar was sitting with his friends, in a similar position to you. he was laughing at something someone had said, you felt your eyes lingering for a moment.

your friend hummed, catching your stare. "how's that going?" he raised an eyebrow when he spoke.

"uh, good. i guess," you shrugged, sipping your drink again to disguise how little you had to say about him as your boyfriend. you only really saw him at parties and occasionally he'd have you 'round with his friends. other than that, you didn't see much of each other. it was weird, you felt like you saw more of him when you were just friends. now that you were pretending all the time, it didn't feel like it did before.

"good?" he frowned. "that's it? give me the juice— how is he in bed? i heard he's pretty good," he pursed his lips as he spoke. your face contorted when he brought the topic of sex up.

"where do you here these things?" you scoffed.

"you didn't answer my question," he nudged your arm. you glanced at him again, he caught your gaze this time and you quickly looked back at your friend.

"i don't know," you shrugged. "we haven't done anything yet. he wants to take it slow or something," it felt weird lying through your teeth like this. especially to one of your closest friends. also, you weren't a very good liar at the best of times and something told you that your friend didn't believe you.

"doesn't sound like the spooky i've heard about," he made a face and you shrugged again.

"you need to stop listening to these things about my boyfriend, please," you joked halfheartedly, hoping to diverge the topic of conversation.

you spent the rest of the party mainly with your friends, until later in the night when oscar grabbed your arm and pulled you aside. he took you away from your friends and his. he backed you against a nearby wall, reaching out and picking up your hands with his. he began to fidget with your fingers.

you gulped, it was weird being this close to him still and having him treat you like this. you'd been friends for so long it was weird seeing this side of him.

"you good?" he mumbled. you nodded, letting out a soft smile. "i saw you talking to your friend earlier."

you hummed. "yeah," you shrugged. "he was asking me about you."

oscar wore a smile when you said this, breathing a laugh. "oh yeah?" you nodded, mimicking his smile. you could talk to oscar like this no problem, it was the intimacy you were getting used to. "that's why you couldn't keep your eyes off me, huh?"

"ha-ha," you teased, rolling your eyes. "you're just so attractive, it's hard to look away," you raised an eyebrow, teasing him. he nudged your stomach with his elbow, you hurled over a little and laughed.

"shut up," his hands moved to your neck, his thumbs rubbing against your jaw line. it was kind of comforting having him touch you like this. and even if this was just for show, it proved what you always knew deep down— that oscar was a softie. "i'm gonna kiss you now, ok?"

you stiffened a little, he stepped closer, pushing you further up against the wall. your breath caught in your throat a little but still you nodded. you knew this was part of the deal but still, this was the first time of you'd kissed each other. and it was in a very public place.

before you could voice your uneasiness, he leaned down a little and pressed his lips against yours. you were caught a little off guard, but still you kissed him back. his hands roamed down to your waist where he pressed you against the wall. you gasped a little as he did so, allowing his tongue to slip into your mouth. your hands moved to the nape of his neck, pulling his body closer to yours.

you had to pull away after a while to catch your breath, your chest rising and falling pretty heavy when you did. "do you think she was looking?" something felt wrong, him asking about his ex-girlfriend after he'd just made out with you. but that's exactly what you were doing it for. so he could get his ex-girlfriend to notice them and realise what a mistake she'd made.

your hands dropped to your sides, tilting your head to the side a little to try and get a glimpse of his ex. which you did, she was staring daggers at you. you couldn't help but laugh a little at the look on her face. your eyes moved back to oscars face, snickering.

"what?" he smiled, mimicking the expression on your face.

"you know the expression, if looks could kill?" he wore a smug smile and nodded. "well, i'd be dead."

you both laughed together, his face nestling into your neck for a second. you continued to laugh, ignoring the feeling in your stomach. you were beginning to think that maybe you should've listened to your best friend.

"that's good though, right?" you spoke up after you'd both calmed down a bit. "that's what we're after. pure jealousy and hatred— oh my god, what if she tried to scrap with me over you? do you think she would do that?" your eyes widened when you thought about it. you weren't much of a fighter. you left that up to oscar.

he chuckled at the expression on your face. "nah, i won't let her touch you," it was nice to know he was still protective of you as his friend.

"good, i'll hold you to that," you mumbled, smiling a little now.

"come on," he grabbed your hand and began to pull you back to the rest of the party. you stopped him before he got too far, his eyebrows furrowed when he looked back at you.

something had been playing on your mind since your conversation with your friend before. "hey, you'd have sex with me right?"

he let out a laugh, raising his eyebrows. that didn't reassure you much, you frowned and punched his shoulder. "what kind of question is that?"

"don't laugh about the thought of having sex with me! that's so mean," you gawked at him. "i just meant, if you weren't my friend and you didn't know me, would you think i'm pretty enough to have sex with?"

he couldn't help chuckling, you'd caught him off guard with the question. it didn't reflect how he really felt about it. "yeah— absolutely. you're hot, y/n. you don't need me to tell you that."

you hummed, shrugging your shoulders. "ok," you carried on walking. "that makes me feel better."

"why?"

"no reason," you glanced at him with a smile. "just wanted to hear you say it," you teased, joking as he shook his head.

"loca," he rolled his eyes.

"shut up."

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kaypeace21 · 4 years ago

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Stranger things is about mental health & trauma- deal with it!

I’ve seen a lot of people claim anyone who mentioned this topic immediately be gaslit and told they’re “just crazy” and “rudely projecting their own issues on to the characters.’ Like- no you don’t have to believe my Will DID/Lonnie theory ( I could be wrong). But to claim one of the show’s central themes isn’t about mental health/trauma (screams either complete lack of lit comprehension or denial cause you have your own negative biases towards such people). So let’s just go into what’s literal text-not subtext/symbolism. Just the super blatant stuff. RIGHT IN THE SHOW!

-We have El when she first appears on screen asked by Benny if her parents starved and hurt her and if that’s why she ran away. Benny then calls CPS to say El “may have been ab*sed or something.” After this Lucas says there is “seriously something wrong with her-wrong in the head. She’s probably from the NUT-HOUSE in curly county.penthurst” We also see El cannonically has PTSD-all of s1 she’ll see something benign (a cat, a coke commercial, a closet) and is triggered to see a traumatic flashback. That’s literally ptsd. There’s also hints throughout the seasons she’s developmentally behind in both language, telling time etc (neglect like El’s irl can cause an intellectual disability-analysis on El/that subject here).The real pethurst in pensylvannia (not the one in stranger things/ Curly county) closed in 1986- it was a facility for people and mostly kids with intellectual disabilities (it wasn’t technically a psych facility like the one in st)-but it was infamous for it’s abuse of these intellectually disabled patients kept there. We also have Brenner be a ab*sive psychiatrist.

- Hopper after suffering from the loss of his daughter. Is popping pills like candy, drinking and smoking constantly. He later says he used to hallucinate and forgot what was real -seeing and hearing sarah and says if he didn’t confront the pain he’d “fall down a black hole he couldn’t get out of.” NO... subtext here about what the void represents nope.

- Both mothers (Terry & Joyce) are dismissed as being mentally ill and simply grieving the loss of their kids . But both end up being right about the supernatural.

- “Terry pretends Jane is real. i mean it’s all make believe. you know the doctors all say it’s a coping mechanism.”

- While with Joyce the whole town pre s1 already questioned her mental health. Jonathan says “She used to have anxiety problems (pre s1).” And Jonathan, Hopper, and Lonnie all assume she’s hallucinating: talking to Will via lights, seeing a man without a face, saying Will’s body is fake -due to grief. Plus Lonnie mentions the fact Joyce’s aunt Darlene also used to hallucinate as a possible reason (terry’s aunt also had mental health issues mentioned in s2 by Becky). Lonnie even says everything Joyce is seeing is “all in her head.” Hopper and Jon both say she needs to sleep and accept reality and Lonnie says she needs to see a “shrink”. Hopper “i’m not saying that you’re crazy”. Joyce : “no, you are.” Joyce also says to Lonnie “Stop looking at me like that... like everyone else like i’m out of my damn mind.” Hopper also says about Joyce she’s “on the edge”. Callahan says in response , “she’s been on the edge for a while now” (referring to her mental health- even before Will’s dissappearance)”. While Lonnie says Jonathan is “feeding into her hallucinations ... you’re going to push her right over the edge.” In s2 Hopper says “ I think everyone is on edge- you, me, Will most of all. (when talking about Will’s ptsd/trauma)”

- in s1 They claim Will just “fell” over the edge of the quarry’s cliff. Later the only other queer coded character (Mike) jumps off the quarry cliff (where Will’s body was found) cause the homophobic troy forced him too jump. Troy even says earlier dead-Will is “flying with all the other fairies all happy and gay” (to Mike). And Troy says to Hopper El made Mike “fly” after jumping off the cliff. Friendship saved him from jumping off the edge metaphorically ( and he’ll prob eventually be happy and gay too).

s2/3

-Will is seeing a therapist . And we are told he has ptsd and will experience the anniversary effect, personality changes,nightmares, having episodes, etc. And things “will get worse before they get better”. Mike also asks if what Will is seeing is “real or like the doctors say all in your head?” And Will continues to see hallucinations of the mf/upsidedown that only he can see initially.

-Hopper also agrees with owens mentioning how he knew guys with ptsd . joyce : “it’s not like he’s describing a nightmare. He talks about them like they’re real.” Hopper: “Yeah, because they’re not nightmares they’re flashbacks.I think he’s right about trauma.I think everyone is on edge (bringing that s1 ref back), Me you, Will, most of all.Nothing’s gonna go back to the way that it was. But it’ll get better.In time.”

-Nancy suffers from survivor’s guilt and drunkingly says she killed Barb. Jonathan says like Nancy he has “a weight that you that carry all the time . i feel it too.” (cough depression). He also says he tries to be there for Will but says about Will “he’s not the same. maybe things can’t go back to the way they were. (mirroring Hopper’s words earlier that season)”

-Jonathan said in s1 Joyce had “anxiety issues” than Nancy says in s3 “you really are your mother’s son... you worry too much.” Then we see him look worried after the comment.

- in s2, Axel & a scientist both call El and Will “schizos” because of their powers. In s3 mrs driscoll isn’t believed about the supernatural cause she’s schizophrenic-but like Joyce/Terry was right.

- Kali saves a woman named Dottie (a british slang term for crazy) from a mental hospital and then compares herself and El to dottie. saying her non-powered gang is “Like us ...outsiders... society discarded them.” In graphitti we even see the title “obedlam” a british poem about discarding the mentally ill and leaving them homeless. El before this sees a mentally ill man screaming “we’re all dead!” Kali’s friend says to El, after this encounter they were “dead all of us” until kali “saved them here” (points to head) “and here” (points to heart). Pointing to the theme of love and friendship helping those with such issues. Similar to the cliff analogy.

-The cycle of ab*se. Max in s2 says she’s afraid of becoming like Billy (her ab*ser). We see Billy mimic his ab*ser neil and inflict pain on max. In s3 we see the roots of his behavior are linked to mimicking Neil- Neil in a flashback says about baseball “what are you scared?” “ did i raise a p*ssy for a son”. So young Billy later in a fight says to a boy “ what are you scared to fight me? fight me p*ssy. (as he beats the boy)” Deflecting his anger of his father on to someone else. In s3, We see as a kid he used to say to Neil “don’t hurt her” (his mom)-specifically after Neil backhand slaps her -but we later see possessed Billy backhand slap Max (just like neil). The resentment to his mother leaving - festered into how he views women and max negatively . And his attraction to mrs wheeler prob is linked to him subconsciously missing his mother. Max in s2 even says he can’t take it out on her mother so he does so to her instead (we even have Billy hallucinate hurting mrs wheeler).We see in s2 the cycle of abuse is there- Billy mimics Neil, and then Max mimics Billy. Billy harrasses Max and yells “SAY IT!” (mimicking Neil). Max like Billy later yells “SAY IT” and uses a bat /violence to stand up for herself against Billy- which earlier she said she was trying to combat … explaining she can be angry like Billy sometimes but she never wants to be like him (her nickname symbolizing this: aka ‘mad max’). Billy’s last dying words were an apology to Max- for becoming her neil. And we hopefully will see Max break this cycle.

- Will says his now memories (that he describes like dreams) are “growing “, “spreading “,and “killing”. While Kali says they need to face their father and (as Brenner) says El has to confront her “wound” or else it’ll “grow”, “spread” and “eventually it’ll kill her.” Kali says she used to be like El . She used to bottle her pain away and it “spread.” But she then says “I confronted my pain and I finally began to heal (from those wounds).” We also see with jonathan and nancy when describing “shared trauma” zoom in onto the scars on their hands. The wound heeled into a scar so to speak.

S2 & 3 ENDINGS

both have Hopper do a speech that delves into dealing with trauma/depression but still finding good along the way.

-s2 Hopper outside the snowball: “how are you holding up? Yeah, that feeling never goes away. It is true what they say, you know. Everyday it does get easier.”

-s3 Hopper monolouge : “ Feelings jesus. For so long, i’d forgotten what those even were. I’ve been stuck in one place,in a cave you might say , a deep dark cave (cough s2 supernatural cave). For the first time in a long time, i started to feel things again. I started to feel happy. Life... yeah sometimes it’s painful .sometimes it’s sad, and sometimes it’s suprising... happy.. And when life hurts you, because it will .remember the hurt . The hurt is good. It means you’re out of that cave.”

BUT YES- St has nothing to do with mental health/trauma, we’re just “crazy” and “projecting”. It’s not like some of ya’ll act pompous when you just have a bias and get pissy at the idea of relating to characters you “other” as “crazy” or “damaged” irl or anything (so attack people for pointing it out). Or (benefit of the doubt) you are just like.... oblivious... or just a kid who doesn’t know better XD

#stranger things #el hopper #will byers #jim hopper #joyce byers #max mayfield #billy hargrove #kali prasad #mike wheeler #jonathan byers #nancy wheeler

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recurring-polynya · 3 years ago

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i’m gonna try out my luck for the renji bday thing😭

- renji being a mediator between rukia and ichika(idk why i feel like rukia and ichika would get into rly dumb arguments and just fight like they’re the same age)

- renji and ichika get a tattoo

- jealous rukia(of course)

- anything that takes place in inuzuri, i loved your ‘dumb teens stealing kisses’ snippet so much 😭

- more of the tattoo artist renji falls for a client AU

I hope you’ll forgive me for cheating a bit, but when I saw this, I said, “what if I just gave you more of the dumb teens stealing kisses” fic? because honestly, it’s just sitting here.

For people who don’t obsessively follow my incoherent ramblings about my own WIPs, this is an excerpt for i can’t believe i found you in that town, a story that takes place during Renji and Rukia’s last year in Inuzuri. Two out of their three friends have passed away, their powers are growing steadily stronger, and they are starting to face the fact that they aren’t children anymore. I have two more parts of Heart is a Muscle to get through first, so I never work on it, but it is very close to my heart.

PS: This is not going on ao3 at this time, because I really do intend to finish it eventually, so consider this a Tumblr exclusive.

❄ ❄ ❄

In a strange confluence, all three of them have found gainful employment at the same time.

Renji is guarding crates. He does not ask what is in the crates. He does not want to know what is in the crates. He stands next to the crates and his size deters most people. Occasionally, he is called upon to punch someone in the face. It’s good work.

Fujimaru got him this gig, actually. Mameji was good with numbers and he taught Fujimaru a lot, and now Fujimaru has a gig keeping the books for the guys who own the crates. That seems like pretty good work to Renji, too. Fujimaru says he wishes it involved more punching people. Renji wishes his job involved punching fewer people. Everyone’s got complaints.

Rukia has found work in a shop. This is charming and hilarious to both boys. It’s a pawn shop that paradoxically seems to buy about three times as much junk as it sells. It’s obvious that the only reason the owner hired Rukia is because the clientele likes to come in and look at her, but the fact is, she’s an amazing bargainer, and she’s making him a ton of change.

Renji stops in one late afternoon when his own shift is over, and watches her sell a man a knife that looks like it will break if he looks at it funny. She offers to throw in a shitty ball of twine and the man agrees to pay what is easily four times what the knife is worth, and leaves smiling. Amazing.

The shop owner eyes Renji warily. Renji never starts trouble, and he’s even stopped it once or twice, but at the same time, his presence is cramping the appeal of the pretty shopgirl.

“I’m off,” Rukia tells her boss.

“See y’tomorrow,” the seedy man grumbles.

“You don’t get paid every day?” Renji asks Rukia loudly. “I get paid at the end of every shift.”

“She gets paid at the end of the week,” the shopkeeper grouses.

Renji flexes one arm experimentally, admiring his own bicep. “It’s nice getting paid every day. Makes you want to come back the next day, y’know.”

“She comes back every day so she can get paid at the end of the week.”

Rukia’s eyes dart between them.

“Ah, you must be a great boss, very trustworthy,” Renji comments, stretching his back. “Although gettin’ paid every day is a nice way to show trust, too. Hey, Ru, you wanna stop at Takahashi’s on the way home? I heard they got in some dried mackerel and I,” he winks at Rukia’s boss, “got paid today.”

“Pfft,” Rukia huffs, wrapping her shawl around her shoulders. “I’m sure it’s a scam. We need rice, though, and more water.”

“Hey, girl,” Rukia’s boss spits out. “You had a good shift! Here’s your pay for today, as a reward for doing so well. Come back tomorrow, okay?”

“Of course,” Rukia agrees, taking the coins with a sly smile.

As they head out of town, she jabs him in the ribs with her elbows. “You’re so obvious.”

“Got you paid, didn’t I?”

“You did, thank you. He hates you, you know.”

Renji sighs dramatically. “How can I live with myself?”

Rukia snorts. “He’s gross, I hate him. I hate that whole job. Smiling at people. Acting kind to horrible people. It’s so fake. I don’t know why you like working so much, I’d rather just steal.”

“I’ve seen you working, what you do is not much different from stealing.” Renji rubs his hands together. It’s getting cold, especially with the sun setting. “I appreciate the effort, though. I mean, we do. Me and Fujimaru. I like this. Having money, that is. It’s nice.”

Rukia regards him out of the corner of her eye.

“Do you? Do you appreciate it?”

Renji frowns. “Yeah, of course I do. I know you don’t like it.”

Rukia stops walking and turns to him. “C’mere.” She gestures toward herself and makes the pointing motion she does when she wants him to bend down to her level. Even though this results in a cuff to the back of his head more often than not, Renji obeys. “If you really appreciate it, I think you should do something nice for me.”

Renji should know by now to be wary of such an ominous statement, but he falls for it anyway. “Sure. Name it.”

“I want to kiss you again.”

Renji tugs at his ponytail. “Again? Really?”

It was probably six years between the first and second time she had wanted to kiss him, but the second time had only been a few months ago, last spring, after he broke his arm saving her from a large, angry man she had attempted to pickpocket.

“You said you were open to the idea,” Rukia scowled.

“I...did,” Renji stammered. To be fair, he had been in immense pain at the time and probably would have agreed to just about anything. He could have used that as an excuse. It seemed like Rukia was thinking the same, he could tell she was already getting herself wound up to be hurt at his rejection. That stung a little, the idea that she expected so little of him. “No problem. Anything for you. Go for it.” He bent his knees a little deeper and squeezed his eyes shut, bracing for impact.

“You gotta relax a little, man, it’s not a punch in the nards,” Rukia scolded, grabbing ahold of his ears and laying one on him.

Renji didn’t fantasize about kissing girls. He liked girls well enough, but he liked guys more. There was one exception to that rule, and that was Rukia. He liked her more than anyone. It wasn’t right to fantasize about Rukia, though, in his opinion, because he lived with her and it wasn’t respectful and also… also, if he spent too much time thinking about things like kissing her, he might want to do it. So, he avoided the slippery slope of girls in general, and restricted his spicy kissing fantasies to the lean, knife-eyed Rukongai punks that hung out on street corners and had really sexy ways of saying “heeeeeey.” Renji was perpetually working on his “heeeeeeys.”

But Rukia was kissing him now, and it seemed equally disrespectful to pretend she wasn’t. Her lips were soft against his, and curious. Her fingers relaxed their painful grip on his ears and snuck around to rest on the back of his neck. She must have been keeping her hands in her sleeves, because they were warm, and they felt so good and this was good, this was so, so good and it occurred to Renji that maybe he was meant to kiss her back, she had never mentioned anything about--

“There, that wasn’t so bad, was it, Abarai?” Rukia was saying.

It was over.

Renji blew air out his cheeks. “Naw, it was fine. Ah, did you, uh… was it everything you hoped and dreamed?”

“It was okay,” she shrugged, but her eyes twinkled. She started walking again and Renji had to do a little skip and a jump to catch up. “Fujimaru’s probably home already. How come he didn’t come with you to pick me up?”

“Oh, there were extra crates today, so he’s working late. But we can have the rice ready and surprise him!”

“Mm, yes, that sounds nice,” Rukia agreed. She hummed a little as she walked. “Hey, Renji?”

“Yeah?”

“Back at the shop-- did you call me Ru? What was that?”

Renji made a face. “I dunno. I thought it was cute.” You’re cute, his brain added, and suddenly, he couldn’t unsee it. She was unbearably cute, wrapped up in her shawl, that little piece of hair hanging between her eyes, those beautiful eyes. “If you don’t like it, I’ll--”

“You’ve known me for nine years and you decide, just now, to give me a nickname?”

He shrugged. “Things can change, right? Even out here in the ass end of Rukongai?”

She regarded him for a moment. “It is cute. I will allow it, but only from you, and don’t do it around gross people like my greasy boss.”

“Yeah, no prob,” he agreed, squeezing his hands under his armpits. He had a bad feeling that they were in for a brutal winter this year.

“Hey!” Rukia said, and he realized she was holding out his hand to him. Gingerly, he took it, hoping she wouldn’t mind his own cold fingers. She didn’t seem to.

#renji's birthday 2k21 #my writing #i was strongly tempted to do another chapter of the tattoo artist au on top of this #except that the next chapter doesn't even have renji in it #it has rukia and orihime TALKING ABOUT renji if that counts for anything #and then i ran out of time #i know i have posted an excerpt of this excerpt before i am sorry i just love it TOO MUCH

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bixqueen · 4 years ago

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so thanks to hboMAX my pretty little liars obsession has started up again and when i watched pll the first time all the way thru (yes sadly it’s been more than once i have a life but also don’t) my favorite character was alison. as i’ve watched it more it changed (emily or spencer is prob my fav now) but going through tumblr, instagram, and even pinterest, i feel alison gets too much shit/hate from the fandom. so here i am, making a justification for her. if you really don’t want to see my side or pov then just keep scrolling because i don’t really want to see negativity in the comments (unless you’ll actually say something, a rebuttal?)

so let’s start off with alison being a small child and her household/family. we know how her parents would manipulate her and tell her lying is better than telling the truth. she’s had these really bad influences on her at such a young age (with secrets overflowing her house) and when you continue to have these influences on you as you’re mind is maturing, of course you’re going to eventually go through with them. now yes i know the other girls also had lying parents but were any of them as bad as alisons? i mean some things spencer’s parents kept and arias but they were also older at that point (middle of high school and up). i’m not saying it’s okay but they knew at that point in their life what’s wrong and right and for the most part they had been raised to not lie. alison wasn’t. eventually her lies caught up to her as well so even though she learned the hard way to tell the truth, she eventually did.

now we’re getting into the high school stage where there were MANY points as to why she would’ve ran away. if the writers wanted a better redemption arc for her i feel they would’ve shown her a little more broken in some scenes and such but anyways. freshman year isn’t absolute hell but it’s not fun either. having the mindset of making sure you’re not the one who will get hurt obviously forces you to have this wall and makes you a lot more mean than you really are. (i really feel this was a wasted potential by the writers not going more in depth about her mental pain but shit they didn’t do it with anyone tbh). her whole life kinda had build ups to her being so secretive and closed away (again if the writers went into more depth on this we would’ve seen maybe some trauma that causes her to be closed off and push everyone away. not wanting to show weaknesses) from everyone so it definitely wasn’t hard for her to find that bitchier side and let it off on everyone, not that it’s right, it just made her feel safe and protected. a main factor of this was probably being closeted. i myself am a bisexual girl so i know how it feels to question yourself the way she most likely did. it’s scary. really fucking scary. because you don’t know if there’s something wrong with you at first or if it’s just a stage and you’ll most likely pass it. it’s why i believe her relationship with emily was why she had no big deal leaving rosewood. yes we know she was being tormented by A before the girls were and she wanted to leave so she could be safe. but even with that there would need to be some other factors that kicked in to her actually leaving. A in the beginning for JUST alison was kinda like a bully right? i mean a little more extreme than that but it wasn’t as bad as it was when it started hitting with the other 4 girls. so if alison THE alison dilaurentis was being bullied by someone too scared to show who they really are, wouldn’t she just laugh some of it off? alison WANTED to leave before mona gave her the option. she was scared. and not just of A, but of who she was. and who she loves.

if we’re looking at what alison does for emily versus the other girls while they’re being tormented by A, you can tell she cares for her more. she saved emily more than anyone else. she said leaving emily was the hardest part of it all. because alison was in love with emily, just like emily was in love with her back. obviously running away and faking your death isn’t the best option for having internal panics, some people just don’t know how to manage it. especially being the bold person everyone sees and talks about. imagine seeing her walk out of some therapy session teary-eyed. she’d feel so weak in that moment, so vulnerable. isn’t that one of her biggest fears? people seeing she’s not as strong as she comes off to be and they can use that against her. her fear for being vulnerable also brings me to her being SO scared coming back to school after faking her death. ali, the queen bee, is terrified. this kinda brings to me childhood pain (personally this is why i thought of it lol rip). maybe her family thought showing emotions was weakness you know? and when you open up they kinda laugh at you and they’re like “you think you’re life is hard?? you’re a kid.” (i’m sure i’m not the only person who’s heard this mf bullshit bedore). where i’m going with that though, is it could’ve been placed in her head at a very young age (also this is so dehumanizing and traumatic damn but it makes sense) that you have to shut out all feelings and emotions. it really makes people numb and being emotionally numb as a child and teen is dangerous for brain growth and development. makes sense why it took her forever to feel safe and okay opening up to emily about her feelings and showing emotions around the girls. when you’re seen as this “bitch” who doesn’t make down from a fight, it forces you to turn emotionless.

so the way she acted out the night she went missing and her freshman year wasn’t ideal and it really wasn’t okay. but the audience never saw what she was going through mentally, hell even after that. we see it a little when she comes back and talks about the night she went missing. imagine your own mother burrying you alive. god the trauma that must STILL have on her. being under pounds of dirts, unable to move or talk. your own mother doing this to you to save someone else. i’m not trying to put it as she’s only been through things and no one else has cus of course that’s not the case. i just think people often dismiss her pain and trauma and just say “she’s a bad person and deserves the shit she’s been through.”

i’d also like to add her type of crowd she was around wasn’t the best sort of people. imagining being a freshman and hanging out with college kids who would throw some girl down a flight of stairs. i feel like that also had an impact on her mental health and what she believed was okay to an extent because i mean verbally bullying isn’t okay but at least sis never pushed someone down the stairs 😭 (worst thing she did is definitely blinding jenna. i really don’t know how to defend her actions for that one. you could say she didn’t know anyone was in there? or that she didn’t know she had- it was a firework right?)

last point i can think of: paige vs alison. of course i have to add this lol but my main point with this is both girls were mean to each other. did alison start it by calling her names and such? most definitely. do i think paige should’ve retaliated? to an extent. but she went as far as teaming up with others to have alison go to jail for a crime she didn’t commit. their revival wasn’t just one sided and again i think people often forget that. they’re continuously like going against each other at every chance they got. it was funny but also got annoying. ali would shit talk to paiges face then paige would go whine and cry about it to emily to turn emily on her side. i mean did we forget paige manipulated emily against alison? (yes ik alison was the manipulation queen when she was younger). really what i’m going with this is that they’re more alike than they’ll admit to an extent. me personally, i like alison and emison more. i never really liked paily but paige grew less annoying in later seasons. but when comparing them, i believe paige had more damage on emily than alison did. even when alison was ‘dead’ she still saved emily’s life at times (including the other 3 girls) and did things to protect them. i don’t remember paige saving emily just trying drowning her because she was a little jealous. another thing i know someone will try to bring up about them is how “alison was never happy for emily” well shit bro neither was paige 😭 i’m on season 7 right now and there were some times paige took a liking into stalking emily while she was dating that girl who worked in the cafe (sorry i can’t remember her name rn). and when emily talked about being with that girl she was kinda like 😐 k. alison is the type to speak or show her mind while paige seems to keep to herself then shit talk others behind their back. both qualities aren’t exactly the best so both ‘sides’ can go against each other for years on this. they’re just more alike than people realize.

anyways, there’s that. if you have any opinions (WHERE YOU’LL ACTUALLY ARGUE SOMETHING AND NOT JUST SHIT TALK ME!!) feel free to leave a reply. and if i left out something you want me to add in i will :) have a good day <3

#pretty little liars #pll theories #alison dilaurentis #emily fields #emison

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argumentl · 3 years ago

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The Freedom of Expression, radio version - Ep 27, April 2016. - Instant yakisoba, TV/Radio presenter faked academic record, new jingle appeal.

Kaoru begins by expressing his joy that its April, which means the show has been continued for another 3 months. He says he therefore has a new plan for the show, which he will announce in the second half.

Next, he reads out an email from a listener. This relates to a brand of cup yakisoba noodles named 'Peyong', which appears very similar in name and packaging to the well know instant yakisoba, 'Peyoung'. At first glance, it seems like a counterfit version, but on closer inspection, it is actually a legitimate product of Maruka Shokuhin, the company that makes 'Peyoung'. They just put out a cheaper version of this already well know product. The listener knows Kaoru and Joe are fans of Peyoung, so wanted to tell them about it. Kaoru says he knows about this, but he hasn't tried it yet. He is however, drawn to these kind of second class versions of well known things. Joe says Hiranabe has tried it, and invites Hiranabe on to explain how it differs from the original Peyoung. Hiranabe says firstly, the package is a different shape, and the noodles are thinner than the original. It also lacks some added ingredients like chicken etc, which makes it healthier. It has fewer calories than the original. Hiranabe's problem is that it is too easy to eat. He always ends up eating more than one pack, which ends up as more calories than if he just ate one of the original type. Joe jokes that he noticed Hiranabe is getting fat. As for yakisoba, Kaoru says he likes the veggies that come in it, like cabbage etc. He wants one that has an extra large portion of cabbage with it. Hiranabe says this cheaper version 'Peyong', does have a lot of cabbage in it, therefore it would be good for Kaoru. He warns Kaoru not to eat too much though. If Kaoru got a fat belly like Hiranabe, it would be bad. Joe asks Kaoru whether he ever gets tempted to eat in the middle of the night while he is song writing. Kaoru says, no, he can control himself quite well.

After playing a record, Kaoru re-introduces Hiranabe, whose moblie phone starts ringing at that point. He says its a hostess calling him at this hour, late at night. Kaoru says they get tonnes of emails from listeners saying Hiranabe is awful.

Hiranabe's news story this time is about the radio and tv presenter/economic commentator Sean K (Sean McArdle Kawakami) who was found to have lied about his entire academic background. They can't believe he got as far as he did in his career based on lies. He even managed a 15 year career on radio. Hiranabe mentions that Kawakami has also aided his success by having surgery to improve his appearance. A photo which surfaced of him during his high school days looks totally different from his current appearance. Despite the amount of surgery he had, it probably only amounted to as little as ¥500,000 in costs, according to a cosmetic surgeon who was interviewed by Hiranabe. Hiranabe suggests he could get the same surgery, and increase his financial potential. He says that Kawakami could probably re-invent himself in the AV industry or Pro-wrestling world to carry on his carreer. Kaoru thinks there is no need for that, he will prob manage to carry on, as he is already an established celeb.

Next Kaoru announces they have revcieved an email from Kami. The email reads, 'This is Kami/God. I may use the name Kami, but I won't be made into an imposter, will i? I'm so worried, I started a night job.'. The others think this is funny, but they assure him he is safe. Kaoru says he wishes Kami would visit them more. Hiranabe then repeats his feeling of shock that Kawakami got as far as he did using a false cv. Kaoru thinks his success has been down to his voice. He has a low, smooth voice, ideal for radio. Joe says the media have done a lousy job if they couldn't notice his lies. Kaoru isn't that bothered by it. It depends on what the lies were about. In this case it doesn't really do much damage to anyone. He is more impressed that the guy managed to pull it off.

He reckons the TV show that Kawakami worked on as an economic commentator, 'Hodou Station', was probably very shocked when they discovered the truth. Hiranabe says that his ability to play the part so well would do him good in the AV or Pro-wrestling world.

After playing another record, Kaoru says he has recieved another email from Kami, reading 'I feel more anxious after hearing your response. I do not wish to make an AV debut.' Kaoru and Joe both laugh at this. Kaoru then reveals the announcement concerning his new idea for the show. Previously, he had run a competition asking listeners to design the outside surroundings to the Arche cover, but this time he is appealing for listeners to send in a new 'jingle' or opening clip for the show. He plays the original opening clip to give listeners an idea of what is required. He wants people to send in a sound clip, and then they will put the spoken parts over it (the guy speaking in the clip is not Sean K btw, he says). While he explains the submission method, Hiranabe's phone starts ringing again. Like in the previous competition, Kaoru asks people not to worry about skill level, if he finds it interesting, he will use it. He then plugs his Budokan Dvd/bluray, and the new single due in March (which he says is slowly coming along). He finishes with a mention of his blog TheTheDay, and the BGM corner he is running on it.

Songs - Dir en grey/Gyakujou Tannou Keloid Milk, White Chapel/Make it bleed.

#dir en grey #the freedom of expression

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kalimagik · 4 years ago

Text

Enchanted

Sirius Black x Reader

Requested by @grace22207 – Hi!! idk if you take requests and if you don’t that’s totally ok but i just really love ur writing. I was wondering if you could do a Sirius Black x Reader inspired by the song “Enchanted” by Taylor Swift?!? thx i love you 💖💗

Word Count: ~1500

Warnings: Underage drinking (only a tad bit)

A/N: Okay, so this was my first request and I just love getting fresh ideas when I’m stuck! This has lots of fluff and anxiousness because boys can be scary...yeah...anywhooooo, if you enjoy reading, like, reblog, comment, or even follow! You know the deal by now! Thanks for the support guys! If you send me a request on anything and I really like it, I’ll probs do it, but just give me some time! Happy Reading <3 <3

*Not my GIF - credits to owner!

She hated coming to these things. They were always the same. Old, pureblood families complaining about the growing influence of muggle-borns in the Wizarding World. But, nevertheless, Y/N’s parents dragged her to each party. Every. Single. Time.

Plus, every single pureblood parent would come up to her and ask what she was planning to do once she graduated from Hogwarts and what her opinion on the rising dark wizard was. To be honest, Y/N didn’t have an opinion that they would want to hear, so she stood through each conversation. Tonight was no different. Y/N was forcing laughter and faking smiles with her parents’ friends.

She never knew anyone else at these parties, so it was the same old tired, lonely place. Sneaking a drink from the bar, Y/N found a good corner of the room to sit and hide from being the center of attention. She moved to her favorite activity, people watching.

Looking around the room, Y/N viewed all the types of people she had grown to detest over her last 5 years at Hogwarts. She hated these people with their closed minds and vicious words. Why was she still one of them? It wasn’t until her gaze landed on the corner diagonal from hers.

Her Y/C/E eyes immediately locked on his deep, grey ones. He seemed to be watching her. The shifting eyes and vacancy that Y/N had been feeling earlier all vanished when she felt interest radiating off of him.

His eyes whispered. Asking who she was and if they had ever met. He may not know who she was, but she certainly knew him. The boy was Sirius Black. From the teas that Y/N’s mother had with his, she knew that he was a disappointment to the great Black family. She also knew him from school. His antics with his friends were legendary as was his reputation throughout the girls that he courted.

Oh, oh merlin. He was moving. Was, was he moving towards her? Y/N’s hands were up to her mouth as she nervously bit at her fingernails. She lost him for a moment, but his silhouette was making its way over to her.

“Hello, love. I’m Sirius.”

Y/N offered her hand in proper high society fashion and he took it, tenderly kissing the back of her hand.

“Y/N.”

“So, which stiff do you think will get drunkest the quickest?” he joked immediately, scanning the room.

“I didn’t think that the ladies drank,” Y/N responded timidly.

“They don’t.” Sirius has a mischievous smirk on his lips. An alarm went off in Y/N’s head. This could be dangerous. “They don’t, but I spiked the punch to get some entertainment for the evening,” he snickered. “Oh, oh, oh! My money is on Mrs. Lestrange. She’s been downing it for about 30 minutes. 4 cups already.”

Maggie couldn’t help but giggle as she watched the properly dressed woman begin to stumble.

“Have we met before?” Sirius blurted.

“Uhhh, not officially. We do go to school together though.” Y/N felt herself getting shy again under his intense gaze.

As the conversation continued, it began to flow easily. Y/N didn’t feel nervous anymore. It all felt natural. It was all so playful and Y/N found herself countering all his quick remarks. The whispers felt like passing notes in secrecy.

The hours blew by and Y/N’s parents found her in the same corner with Sirius at the end of the night.

“Y/N. It’s time to go. Now,” her dad emphasized.

“Bye, Sirius,” Y/N waved. “Thanks for making the evening more entertaining.”

“Goodbye, Y/N. It was absolutely sparkling, don’t let it go! I’ll see you at school at the end of the holiday. I’ll look for you!”

Y/N felt wonderstruck. Despite her parents berating her for talking to the “poor excuse” of a Black, Y/N didn’t stop blushing all the way home.

Lying in bed that night, she replayed the whole evening in her head. “I wonder if he knows I was enchanted to meet him. No wait. I couldn’t say that to him. It’s stupid.” She thought to herself.

That didn’t stop her from thinking about him. Now she understood why he was known as a charmer at school. Y/N was wonderstruck, dancing around her room all alone.

The rest of the Christmas Holiday lingered on. Every night that lingering question kept her up. At 2 am, she wondered who he loves. With the swirling idea in her head, Y/N was wide awake. She’d pace back and forth, wishing maybe he’d show up at her door. Or when they get back to school he would find her and she could say ‘hey, it was enchanting to meet you…” Why was that the only thing she could think to say to him?

The Hogwarts’ corridors never seemed larger when Y/N returned to school. She couldn’t manage to catch a glimpse of Sirius anywhere. Maybe they wouldn’t see each other again. Maybe meeting at the party had been a fluke. But she was praying that it was only the very first page and not where the storyline ended. Her thoughts just echoed his name and they probably would until she saw him again.

One night shouldn’t have led to these kinds of feelings. So, in natural teenage girl manner, Y/N poked around to see what her friends knew and listened just to see if his name came up in conversation.

“What about the Marauders? Anyone know anything about them? I know James Potter is interested in Lily, but what about the others?” Y/N nonchalantly brought up the conversation.

Y/N’s friends loved to gossip about the boys in their year and the year above them, so Y/N’s words were enough to start the long string of gossip. There was James who had filled the charms room with flowers for Lily and publicly asked her out again in the first week of being back. Peter seemed to have his eye on a Ravenclaw girl, but all of Y/N’s friends giggled, knowing she wasn’t as interested in him as Remus Lupin.

Y/N sat there, barely listening to the conversation, she whispered the words to herself “please don’t be in love with someone else. Please don’t have somebody waiting on you.” No one had said anything about Sirius as the conversation shifted to other boys.

With all the giggling, Y/N completely zoned out. It wasn’t until the Great Hall doors swung open that Y/N jumped out of the thoughts in her head. The Marauders streamed in, one after the other, laughing and winded. Well, Peter was winded, the other three seemed to be in much better shape than him. With their entry, Y/N’s heart leapt into her throat. She hadn’t told her friends about the interaction she had with the boy over the holiday, so they didn’t see her tense up as he walked by their table.

Y/N lowered her head. Maybe he wouldn’t see her and she could just stop thinking about him. Right? That’s how that worked.

The talking at Y/H’s table stopped. What happened to Y/N’s friends? She looked up to meet those deep, grey eyes. “Why hello there, love. Have we met before?” he smirked.

Y/N’s head spun to see her friends’ faces. Some were swooning, others were just drinking in the words he spoke. Surely he was directing his words to one of them though right?

“I told you I’d find you at school,” he continued. His eyes didn’t waver from her own.

Why were words failing her right now? She had been so quick witted with him at the party, but with everyone else watching, she went back to her ‘please don’t look at me…’ ways.

“Did someone use langlock on you?” Sirius chuckled.

“Uhh, no!” Y/N finally got out.

“That’s good to know. Had me worried there for a minute! Anyways, the first Hogsmeade trip is next weekend. Would you maybe want to accompany me? I need an excuse to ditch these three.” He winked at her as he finished his sentence. Ugh, he was dreamy.

Y/N only managed to nod her head a few times to convey the fact that she would very much so like to go with him. Merlin’s beard, why was she acting so stupid right now.

“Excellent! I will see you then.” Sirius’ fingers drummed the table as he stood up to walk away.

With his back to her, Y/N finally let the breath that she was holding escape. Her friends were all turning to her, asking about what just happened before they realized that Sirius had turned back around.

“Oh, and Y/N. I was enchanted to meet you.”

#sirius black x reader #sirius black #marauders #sirius black imagine #requested #young sirius black #fluff #taylor swift song #song fic #harry potter #sirius black fanfiction #harry potter x reader #being awkward #first request #kalimagik #lily evans x james potter #remus lupin #peter pettigrew

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ahmedmootaz · 4 years ago

Text

To Find A Blot

Hello, dear Tumblr folk! How are you doing? Fine as always, I hope. I had made a story predicting (or trying to predict) the events of tomorrow’s episode of Ducktales as a reply to a request. Unfortunately, Tumblr decided that the original post endangered public safety, so here I am, posting it again.

I would like to ask for everyone’s thoughts! Whether they be comments or critiques, I want your feedback! I like long comments, so write away! I hope you like this little piece of mine.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/26551864

And for anyone who prefers a direct Read More button, here it is! Unfortunately, italics do not copy from Archive Of Our Own, however, I think it should be obvious where they were. So, once more, leave your thoughts, and until next time, see ya’!

It was a dark, cold night in the Forest Of...whatever. Lena couldn't care less about what its name was. It was damp, awful, cold, and filled with monsters. No wonder Magica would hide here; it was basically her dream home. Maybe it was a mirror, too. She trudged with her friends, Violet and Webby, who'd oh-so-kindly volunteered to help her on this mad quest of hers. She was going mad, that's what, and they were both ready to go mad with her. She really was lucky when it came to friends.

They kept trudging in silence, not wanting to reflect on the series of what must've been unfortunate events to lead them to searching for Magica DeSpell in the dark, cold night in the middle of a swamp. An ugly swamp, too...though, now that she thought about it, there weren't really 'pretty' swamps, so it wasn't like Magica chose a bad one; they were all bad.

Despite telling herself several times how she was over this, how she had no issues whatsoever about what they were doing right now and that it was for the greater good, she found herself contemplating any other choice. Just what, exactly, led them to this point?!

...Well, they all knew. It was a rhetorical question. An angry rhetorical question. Leave it to the McDucks to be attacked by a literal video-game monster that crawled out of the screen and treating it like another boring day. Which...yeah, it kinda was for them, but she'd gotten used to the calmer household she moved in. It wasn't like that was the biggest thing that happened today, either, it was more like...the appetizer, even though that wasn't really a correct statement, since it was like eating a whole roast duck only to be told it was an appetizer.

Still, it wasn't the tentacle-monster which they took down that led to this situation. It was the fact that Gladstone...Gladner? Something along those lines, showed up. Apparently, he was the boys' uncle, which made him someone she didn't know. Not that it mattered anyway, he came in, crying about how his luck left him forever before weeping on her arm, which was conveniently next to him. Her sleeve was never going to return to regular levels of salt after this.

It took a while before Scrooge managed to calm him down. It seemed like his luck...which was a thing she didn't know about, had left him. Normally, she was told, they would've chalked it up to some paranormal mystery and had to excuse themselves and send her home, but it went further then that...Almost everyone in Duckburg was losing their abilities.

They didn't really believe it at first, but when Scrooge's monetary abilities started going blank, the alarms blared loudly enough in everyone's minds. It wasn't just him, too; Gyro was losing his intelligence, so was Huey, Mrs.Beakly lost a good portion of her Agent skills, and Dewey lost the ability to Dewey, whatever the heck he meant by that.

It only left her and the rest of Team Magic to fend for themselves and figure out what was draining their powers. There was one teeny-tiny problem, however:

How would they do that? Webby was an amazing fighter, but their enemy, a certain Phantom Blot that Violet heard about, didn't leave a trace, much less a body to fight, and despite Violet's best efforts, nothing came out of her investigations to find where he hid, which left Lena to do the job. One issue, however: She couldn't.

She was a brilliant sorceress, or so she bragged, but there was still much she needed to learn before casting detection spells. And they, she theorized, didn't have that time. Violet was an amazing step-sister and a scarily fast learner, but even she came up empty-handed when it came to learning anything about that power. That left one magic user in Duckburg she knew. Ugh.

She shivered at the memory, snapping out of her mind due to some whimpering from Gladstone. He said he needed to find his luck or else he was a goner. She thought he was exaggerating at first, but then a boat nearly fell on him. 4 Kilometres away from sea. He promised he'd do them anything if she let him accompany them on this treacherous journey while the rest of the gang tried investigating using their own ways, and the agreed. How bad could he be, anyways?

-"U-Um...Lena? I don't know how to tell you this...but I...I hate swamps. I don't think I know how to walk in them. It was always my luck helping me out. I'm cold, scared, and humiliated."...well, not too bad, but he just wouldn't shut up! And while he seemed to amuse Webby and Violet, he was just getting on her nerves.

-"Well, nobody here likes swamp, either! And you've been listing the things your luck did for you for two hours now, is there anything you can do on your own, Mr.Gladstone?", she shot back, irked.

He used to argue and bicker with her, but as his luck kept worsening throughout the day (How on earth does one get mauled by a bear, an alligator, and then receive a speeding ticket because the alligator's death-roll was too fast??), he mostly stuck to paranoia to help himself. She couldn't help but feel bad for him, despite how much he annoyed her.

-"W-Well...I used to breathe well on my own...I could also walk...I think...", he mumbled, his voice a broken mess compared to his arrogant and proud tone, or so she was told by Webby. "A-And...I think I might need to learn how to go to the bathroom in the swamp.", he added, his exhaustion overpowering his embarrassment.

-"Pffft, don't worry about it, Gladstone! The entire swamp is your bathroom! You're basically the King of the swamp!", and there it was, the perky, energetic voice that was trying to keep Gladstone away from depression this entire trip.

-"Oh, quit with the lies! I am nothing without my luck!", he cried, seeming on the verge of tears for the...seventeenth time today? Lena couldn't remember. "B-But...It wasn't my choice! My luck was always there for me! Like...Like a-a stick! Something to lean on my entire life and now it is gone!", he lamented, slouching as his footsteps got a bit slower. For the sake of all them, Lena hoped he regained any of his luck soon.

-"Well, it is true; any being born with a condition, abnormal or not, that aids him throughout his life without any major work done from the part of the being will eventually get used to this condition, which could explain why you're taking this particular misadventure hard, Mr.Gladstone.", Violet bumped in their chat, checking the notepad on which they brainstormed the possible locations of Magica. "Still, I'd advise you to remain positive, as I sense we may be able to fix these conditions.", she added, giving him a small, encouraging smile which he didn't notice.

-"Yeah, probs.", the teenage witch agreed after she felt a nudge from the Vanderquack. Anything to cheer up her friend's friends' uncle. "Hey Vi, are we close or not?", she asked, trying to ignore the eye-roll from her shorter friend.

-"Well, I don't have a particularly detailed map, though I imagine that Magica would mark her camp with a particular sign; an X on the ground, perhaps, or perhaps we must deduce it from the surrounding environment-"

-"Or she might've carved her face on the bottom of an ancient tree!", the cheerful duck happily announced as they entered a clearing with a small dirt road that led to the mouth of Magica DeSpell. A wooden carving of her, anyway.

It was just as Webby said, large, reeking of pride and arrogance, and yet...oddly well done. The details were really nice and actually looked like Magica. If she had to give her 'aunt' something, it had to be that she apparently didn't suck at something in her life. Really though, wood carving, of all things? Was she a carpenter before becoming an evil, awful witch? Is she talented? She didn't have her magic...maybe she had someone else with her.

-"Alright, so, is everyone prepared to meet my homicidal aunt?", the tallest duckling asked with fake happiness, receiving a nod form everyone but Gladstone, who emitted something of a sniff. Webby readied the axe she brought with her, patting the kitten at the top while Violet tightened her garlic necklace, while Gladstone...he stood there, steadying his back a bit. "Mr.Gladstone?"

-"Ah, forget about it, whatever she does to me, it can't be worse than having an anvil hit me from ten-meters.", he steadied his tone, managing to make it more bitter than desperate. Well, at least he wasn't going to cry when they see her.

She looked back at the tree's base, blocking out the various memories that gave her the urge to blast the door, and knocked. Harshly. Hey, she was going to give herself something. She felt both Webby and Violet's hands on her shoulders, and she anticipated the door opening. Now or never...they were going to convince her, and somehow, she didn't think it was going to be too easy.

Her mind raced, imagining all the awful things she could be plotting right now. She heard garlic was harmful to magic users, something she didn't know too much about, but was apparently true, as she figured out when her magical powers suddenly dimmed as she touched some garlic. Still, Magica could hit them form a distance...and what about that axe? Was going physical the ideal plan? Was-

CRASH!

The quartet of ducks yelled, jumping back before they realized the door didn't even open. It was something from the inside. Someone, to be exact. A couple of curses came through the door as a metallic sound came through as well.

-"Bloody Hell! Who comes in this hour of the night, in this swamp, to this tree?! I don't even pay bills!", the angry yelling of her not-really-aunt came through. Yep, that was about the attitude she expected. "If you're the Magical Supplies Shop, I'm sorry, but if you couldn't tell, I lost my powers after following a wonderful plan of mine. I cannot pay you in whatever things you want. Now go away before I shoot you!", she answered with a sickeningly sweet tone. Even her voice brought Lena awful memories and forced her to frown.

-"You can do this, Lena. You faced her down before. She can't do anything to you.", Violet squeezed her shoulder, giving her a determined smile. Lena shot one back, before taking a step closer to the door.

-"Hey, this is Lena...Your...", she sighed, bringing a hand to her temple. "Niece?", she finished, awaiting a sick laughter or an undignified scowl at her for attempting to break free from being a shadow. Sorry-not-sorry, Magica. For moment, there was silence. Then there was laughter. Hysterical laughter. So much laughter Lena felt scared.

-"Ooooh, good one, person-who-is-trying-to-fool-me! I don't have a niece! My brother is dead and my sister cannot keep a worm alive! Now scram before my patience runs out!", she thundered from behind the door, leaving the ducklings and Gladstone in shock.

-"She has a brother?", Lena repeated with incredulity, looking at her two friends and Gladstone.

-"I don't know! How should I know? I thought she didn't have family!", Violet answered with equal confusion, shrugging.

-"I mean, technically she doesn't have a brother anymore.", Gladstone chimed in, his voice devoid of any enthusiasm. "Who's this woman anyway? And why does she sound like she woke up on the wrong side of the bed?", he asked, raising his voice a tad too much.

-"The wrong side of the bed?!", came the war-cry from behind the door, only leaving a moment before a couple of locks unlocked and it swung outwards, revealing Magica DeSpell . With a shotgun. Oh, well this was just lovely, wasn't it? "Alright, that does it, I will put more holes than you than there is in...swiss...cheese...", her speech slurred, looking at the three ducklings in front of her house.

The silence remained for a moment, with no one doing anything. Webby brandished her weapon, Violet made a threatening expression, and Lena ignited a spark in her hand. And Gladstone stood there, trying to take all this in. That moment gave Lena enough time to admire Magica's hut; a three-room lodging, more aptly. It was basically a sink, a gas-cooker, and some drawers, a wardrobe, and a bookshelf, all locally-made, apparently. There was also a toilet and a bath in the background. It was a pretty sorry place to live in, but it seemed functional enough.

-"Hi, Aunt Magica.", Lena greeted, gritting her teeth and delivering the widest, fakest smile she could possibly give. "I almost forgot how you looked! We haven't seen each other in such a long time. What a shame.", she continued, trying her best to remain calm and to look the elder sorceress in the eyes. Said sorceress was now surveying the ducks surrounding her, measuring her chances and keeping her hands on the shotgun's trigger.

-"Get out. Now!", the cape-wearing duck yelled, looking dangerously close to a rage-fit. "All three of you. Now!"

-"Three? Hello? I may have lost my luck, but I am certainly not invisible, lady!", Gladstone announced with an undignified tone. He got a glare that shut him up. "Yeah, sure, okay, talk with the people who really matter. Why wouldn't you?", he grumbled bitterly.

-"Listen, as much as we'd love to, we can't really do that.", the younger sorceress laid her hand on her waist, looking both bored and uncaring. At least, she hoped she did. The last thing she needed was for the awful, horrible duck in front of her to sense any weakness, something she assumed she excelled at.

-"Besides, we're already outside! Your evil mind trick won't work on us!", Webby boasted, swinging her axe a bit for intimidation purposes. They didn't seem to work all too well, but at the very least, they made Magica's shotgun point at her just a tiny bit. Was that a victory?...Probably not.

-"Fine then, get away from me! From this place! The last thing I need is to spend my night with a bunch of McDucks.", the gun-wielder practically screamed, her veins starting to bulge from the anger. Her voice was laced with venom dripping off of every word. It was honestly both terrifying and admirable how much hate she poured into every word.

-"I told you we can't.", Lena repeated calmly, trying to avoid a fight she saw she was coming.

And then, just as she hoped things would calm down, a loud, roaring BANG! filled the swamp. Every single member of her group jumped, looking frightened as they searched around for wounded. There were none, only four ducks staring at each other. She'd tricked them. And she didn't even have her magic. Lena frowned and turned her face back to her shadow's origin. Her...uh...creator? She was her shadow, did shadows have creators? Maybe a caster was a better term? As much as she hated it, 'Aunt Magica' rolled off the tongue far better than 'Caster Magica'.

-"Are you searching for fight? Because I'm not certain your chances would be very high with the four of us.", Violet spoke for her step-sister. Her new room-mate at this point, but Lena still appreciated the gesture with all of her heart. It appeared Magica actually fired a shot, even if it was only a warning shot. Everyone tried to make good on that statement, looking as threatening as they could. Even Gladstone lifted his fists, adding a grand total of 4% to how threatening they were.

-"Maybe you are! Why can't you get away from me? What do you want? I don't have any more plans for the moment, I didn't do anything illegal for the last month, and you're taking my books from my cold, dead, hands!", the former-Sorceress Of The Shadows barked back defiantly, still pointing at them with her gun. "I don't care if you kill me! I'll take at least two of you down before I-"

-"Could you shut up?!", Lena cried out, her eye twitching and doing everything she could to not attack Magica. "We're here because...because...", she couldn't say it. She couldn't bring herself to ask her for help.

-"...You want to buy something?", her 'aunt' guessed, gun still pointing at her head, but apparently curious.

-"No."

-"You want to brag?"

-"...No.", okay, maybe they did, but they couldn't do that. Not now, anyway.

-"Are we here to rent the room?", Gladstone chimed in, scratching his head. Lena was certain Violet explained to him on the way here...but he apparently forgot.

-"I NEED YOUR HELP!", there, she spat it. She couldn't believe she said it, covering her face afterwards. She felt Violet's hand pat her and heard Webby saying something along the lines of 'There, there'.

-"...I'm sorry? Is this...Listen, it's the middle of September, the swamp is humid as all Hell and I'm trying to set up a fan, if you're just here to brag,", she said before adding 'as you McDucks do.' under her breath, "Then you can come sometime else, these garments aren't exactly fun to wear when the humidity is 85% today so-"

-"No, we need the help. But you'd better watch your back, you witch, because if you try to betray us, I'll shove this axe right down your head!", Webby warned threateningly, patting the kitten once more. Magica actually remained silent and judged what she said, and Lena decided it was time to uncover her face again.

-"And why would you need my help?", the witch repeated, lowering her weapon. Lena could just feel smugness radiating off of her, and she hated it with every molecule of her being.

-"There's a thief in town. He's stealing everyone's abilities. Everything about them. He's stealing it. He calls himself the Phantom Blot.", Violet answered, looking rather impatient with Magica, who smiled with a hum.

-"And why should that concern me?", she smugly inquired and...well, she wasn't wrong. Lena hated that she wasn't wrong.

-"The Phantom Blot hates magic and its users. He wants to eradicate the both of them and you, if I remember correctly, are a witch, yes?", the hummingbird explained, gaining a bit more of a reaction this time: A chuckle. They really couldn't find anyone else, huh?

-"Listen, Purple, if you can remember so well, then you might as well remember that Lena over there stole all of my power. I'm in no danger of this Phantom Blot.", she shot back, a taunting smile on her beak and crossing her arms.

-"Alright, listen up you freak, maybe you don't realize this, but he doesn't know that you don't have your powers. All he knows is that you were the single biggest magical spell to hit this town less than a year ago. I'd say you're still on his hit list.", not taking any more of this back-and-forth, the younger sorceress quipped, closing her hands together and trying a smirk of her own to counter the furious frown and growl her 'aunt' gave her.

-"And you're still on our hit list, you monster! So don't try to even think about doing anything funny!", Webby added, giving her best-friends a reassuring smile, though a somewhat threatening one.

-"I don't think I care about that too much."...she didn't? Oh. Well. There goes the entire base of their plans. "My family isn't here, neither is my home, I don't have my powers, I struggle to eat half-decent food, and I can't even make any new plans after that piece of-", she stopped herself, "Sorry, after Glomgold took everything I had monetarily. In other words, life isn't looking too great for me.", she finished indifferently, though a bit sad and bitter. Huh. That's...really odd. Bitter yes, but sad? Lena wouldn't have ever expected that from her.

-"Tough luck, lady. There's a great pharmacy that sells anti-depressants on the next corner. You know. If you're like me and lost all the joy your life ever had.", the former-luckiest duck in the world suggested darkly, pointing a thumb somewhere. "Look, I don't know you, you don't know me, but please just do me a favour, alright? I need your help. Magic or whatever I just...I just need my luck back. I need my life back. Can you please help us for the good of your heart?", he got down on his knees and begged, not showing too much emotion, but just enough to almost make you forget his bitterness a moment ago. Almost.

-"...Yeah, listen, the 'good of my heart' doesn't really exist, and even if it did, then I won't be giving it to you of all people.", well...Lena couldn't say she wouldn't say something similar to some duck she barely even knew. Unlike Magica, however, she'd actually accept. Probably. "But it seems Scrooge's thinking isn't there quite yet for all of you.", she stated, almost with disappointment, as she brought two fingers to her temple. "My life at this point is in danger...but that's not really what's motivating me here. What do I have to gain?", ah, straight to the point, are we?

-"What, keeping your life isn't enough for you?", her former-shadow snarked back, utilizing the opportunity to show no respect whatsoever. Ah, that felt good. It didn't feel good to see her nemesis laugh at her, however, as if she knew something she didn't.

-"Now, I may be misunderstanding this, but you don't have much time, yes? Phantom Bolt or whatever is already striking. Both of our lives are endangered, and if it means taking you out...well, I don't need to say much, eh?", oh, how Lena hated the smugness in her voice. They'd accounted for this, but she just wanted to punch her in her stupid beak so much!

-"Fine, does this make you any more inclined?", the younger witch pulled out a purple gem, dangling it from her finger and immediately making Magica's pupils widen.

-"My Sumerian Amulet!", she yelled, throwing herself on Lena, though not with so much force the latter wasn't able to repel her. Indeed, all the younger duckling had to do was raise a hand as her 'aunt' tried grabbing the amulet that was dangling so close to her.

-"There, feeling a bit more excited now?", the intelligent, sharp voice of Violet observed. "We know how much this means to you. Maybe you could even regain your magic with it, yes? This is as much as we're going to offer, so if you don't want it..."

-"...Fine!", came the near-instant response. Magica was biting her lower beak, looking majorly conflicted. "Alright, you have some of ol' Scroogie in you. You want my help? Fine. Fine, no really. How about we seal the deal, then? I help you with whatever it is you want to beat the Phantom Blot, you give me back my Sumerian Amulet, and we all try to kill each other sometime later, affaire conclue?", she extended a fingerless-ly gloved hand, looking all-too-gleeful about all of this. Lena knew the amulet was powerful, but the way Magica accepted their offer...it gave her second thoughts about giving her the amulet.

-"It means 'deal?', Mr.Gladstone.", she heard her step-sister tell the triplets' uncle. Apparently, he wasn't too fond of Magica's new terminology...but then again, neither was Lena. "Though I must wonder how you know of French, Magica.", the short hummingbird muttered as she extended a hand alongside the other three ducks.

-"I have some Savoyard cousins. You're not the only ones with a family here.", came the dry answer.

It took a moment of hesitation, with everyone almost certain that the other side will pull out at the last second. Then, suddenly, Webby's hand went forward and shook, or rather, grabbed Magica's. Violet soon followed, and Gladstone did as they did. That only left Lena, who stared at Magica. If she shakes this hand...she'll take orders from her again. She'll give her the amulet that will make her able to hurt her again. She didn't want to do this...but she had to. Not only for herself, but for her friends. For everyone who depended on her, she took a breath and forced her hand to shake with Magica's. It was...huh. Wow. Her fingers were tiny compared to Lena. How did she never notice?

-"Lovely. Now, you're trying to go after this Phantom Whatever, yes?", the cape-drapped witch asked, looking a bit more enthusiastic. She received a nod from everyone, Gladstone included. "Very well, I can make you an elixir to poison him, though it's going to take some-"

-"Woah woah woah, we're trying to defend ourselves here! Not everyone is a murderer like you!", Lena objected, waving her arms frantically just as her 'aunt' was going to enter her hut. She earned a disapproving stare. She hated them.

-"He's going to kill you, Lena. You're being naïve if you think showing kindness is going to change someone who's bent on murdering you.", the sorceress mocked, resting her hand on her hip. "Besides, why come here in the first place if you're all such big fans of Gandhi?"

-"We want you to teach Lena spell.", Webby replied, her axe still unsheathed, though it only gained an unimpressed look as her enemy got used to it. "We can defeat the Phantom Blot without resorting to your methods, and you'll see that yourself!", she proudly continued, lifting the axe a little higher.

-"A spell?", Magica repeated, mystified. "You...You want me to teach you a spell?! To be back where I belong? To rejoin my magical destiny-", oh, come on. Couldn't she stay clam for five minutes? Why was she acting like a hyperactive child all of sudden? That wasn't how she was supposed to act!

-"Yes, yes, all of that. Now if you could just-"

-"Ooooh, it feels good to be back!", deciding that two could play at the interruptions game, she ignored her 'niece' as she wrapped her cloak around her, covering her beak and moving her fingers for dramatic effect.

-"You are exhausting to be around, you know that?", Lena quipped, glaring at the far-too-gleeful duck in front of her.

-"I try. Now, what spell do you exactly want?"

-"We were thinking about trying a spell to locate the Phantom Blot.", Violet explained, and Lena couldn't help but notice Magica tilted her head just a teeny tiny bit. "We want to know where he is, and if possible, bring him to us.", she clarified, her dignified tone not wavering.

-"You seem worried, witch. Are you worried because you're trying to play us and now you can't?", Webby interrogated with her 'detective accent', looking suspicious to Magica's current indescribable expression.

-"No, it's not that, it's just...Locating people and things is more of a Teleporter thing...", she answered, almost begrudgingly.

-"Welp, we came to the wrong person. I told you! We needed a teleporter, we have a witch. And we made a deal. This is just fan-tastic.", ever the positive one, Lena ranted as she started walking around, waving her arms, exasperated.

-"Of course it would be you to not know magic-branches, Lena.", her 'aunt' scolded, noticing Webby's sudden axe-swing and trying to ignore the obvious threat. "Teleporting is magic. Just a branch of it. I'm more talented in the spells branch and the alchemy branch, alongside shadow-manipulation, of course. Teleporting...well, I can help you. I tried learning it, after all.", she boasted, mumbling the last part to herself more than to the ducklings surrounding her.

-"Branches, huh...And how can we know you're not just messing with us? You could be saying absolute mallarcky!", the seater-wearing duck accused, earning an undignified huff from the older sorceress.

-"I said I tried learning it, and not without some success.", she claimed, hoping to satisfy Lena's questions and just get closer to getting the darn amulet. She didn't. "Listen, my brother was a pretty good Teleporter. I'll tell you what he told me, alright?", she explained further, noticeably uncomfortable with what she was saying.

-"How come I never heard of him if he's so go-"

-"Because you've never spent more than two months in Europe, you brat! Don't you dare talk about the King Of Napoli like that!", she screamed, looking more threatening by the second. A full-blown beatdown was about to ensue if it wasn't for Gladstone, of all people.

-"Hey...I remember that name...He stole my car when I was on a trip in Europe! And my newly-won crown which I won in Barbaria!", he recounted, looking far-too-happy for what he was saying.

-"Bavaria.", Violet corrected.

-"Whatever, he just teleported in my car and stole it after throwing me out! And he had someone else with him, too!", the former-luck king continued, still looking inexplicably happy. "I never thanked him for his service! Some old lady saw the accident and thought I needed help, so she gave me one of her luxury jets to console me! Told me nobody was safe from the King Of Napopi.", he finished, a smile on his face. "That was before the whole...unlucky thing...", and now he was going to be depressed again.

-"See? Now just listen to what I tell you and you should be fine!", the elder duck ordered, apparently unable to sense the internal moment of struggle Lena had before she obeyed, taking a step forward.

-"Yes...Magica.", she muttered under her breath, standing in front of her arch nemesis' cold stare. Her friends were there to protect her. There was nothing to fear. Nothing to fear at all. This was just a forced training session. She was going to get through this.

-"I'd appreciate it if you call me Miss Magica.", and yet it didn't seem like her momentary teacher was willing to make this easy for the both of them. Holding her sly smile, she straightened her back and looked at her forced-apprentice for a second. "Let your magic run through you. Teleportation is a complex art, and all its branches need a constant flow of magic through one's self. Location is no different, let the magic run through your body.", she stated, trying to throw her cloak in a dramatic way.

-"Okay so...like this?", the tallest duckling asked, holding her right arm in front of her and sensing the tingling sensation of magic as it coursed through her. She came to control it after a multitude of attempts, so this wasn't much of a trial. "Oh, and since I might as well milk you for whatever you're worth, can I change this colour? I hate this purple.", she wondered, noting that she didn't get any reply before forcing her vocal cords to add "Miss Magica?"

-"Hmm, well, I don't know, the colour of one's magic is determined by both their will and their chosen Branch of Magic, I had to go through lots of training to change my magic's colour, and since this is my magic,", she pointed at the flame-like purple shape that surrounded her 'niece', "It's going to take a lot of time for you to change it back. But it's no special technique. Some can immediately change it, others cannot. It comes eventually.", she continued indifferently, paying attention to the magic that was radiating off of Lena.

-"Don't talk to Lena like that!", the Vanderquack reaffirmed her stance on Magica as she exchanged glares with the now-dysfunctional sorceress.

-"Webs, it's fine. I can deal with her.", her best-friend answered, turning her attention back to her teacher. Oh, how she hated that she had to refer to her as that! Nevertheless, she was surprised she actually got an answer. She expected some insults and nothing else, but it seemed that once they had a deal...she worked with it. It was...unnerving.

-"When it comes to searching for something, you must see it with your blind eye. You must both wish for it, see it in your mind, and release enough magical surges to clear the way for you. Only then will you sense where what you search for lies. For example, I have a red neckerchief in my house with a raven on it in my home. Try sensing where it is.", the DeSpell explained emotionlessly, guiding Lena a bit closer to her home.

She closed her eyes, as she was told, and tried seeing the neckerchief. Red...raven...yep, pretty plain alright. And yet...she tried releasing energy as she was told, but the only thing that was getting released was a bunch of aimless magical balls that deflated on the ground. She couldn't sense anything. She had the image in her brain, but she couldn't really...get 'it', if that made any sense.

-"Not good. As expected, you cannot properly use my magic. Perhaps you need to be more emotionally motivated to feel the 'click'?", of course it would be like Magica to benefit off this situation. Of course. Well, at least she was partially right. Lena grunted as a response, not wanting to give her trainer any more satisfaction than necessary. "Then we must up the risks a bit.", the elder sorceress claimed moving a bit to where her friends stood.

-"Listen here, Magica! Lena's trying her best, and we have no need for you! If you ever- Hey! My...bow...", in an instant, there was a 'splash'. The eldest of the ducklings turned around to see Webby without her iconic bow staring into the stagnant water of the swamp, shocked and furious at the same time. "That was a gift from my grandma!", she yelled back.

-"Oh, quit it, you want to help your oh-so-precious friends, yes? Then let me teach!", the witch shot coldly, evading an axe swing with relative ease, watching as the energetic duckling gritted her beak; they had no one to trust but her. "Now, Lena, this swamp is filled with alligators and all sorts of nasty creatures. If we don't find Debby's bow in five minutes, it might as well be gone forever. If you can find where I threw it, I'll go get it myself. Sounds good?", too good. Especially that last part. In fact, only that last part, since Lena had little faith that she could succeed.

When everyone around her went silent, the young witch turned her head to Webby. She looked distraught. Closing her eyes once more, she faced the swamp and tried sensing for the bow. Pink, small, and plain. It was a rather noticeable part of Webby. Something that clearly meant a lot for her. If she could find it...Then she'd have helped her friends. She saw it...she willed it...and she started releasing magical sparks. For a moment, just like last time, they merely deflated.

Then, all of a sudden...she felt 'it'. A guiding feeling...like an arm on her shoulders. It made her open her eyes, but she could still see the bow. She saw it. She felt it. It was pulsing...the pulsing pushed her to where it came from:...Away from the water? It was behind her. But the only thing behind her was...she turned around to look at Magica, who had a detestably smug expression on her face as she showed Lena her fingerless-ly gloved left hand. The glove had a small bulge near the wrist.

-"Seems as if I was correct.", was all she said. Lena didn't growl or frown this time. She had no reason to. It slightly angered her to agree with her 'aunt', but as far as correctness went, there wasn't much to critique here. "I learnt this little trick as a little girl. It can help you in a tough spot.", she added as she removed it from under her glove, throwing it into her student's hand. "There, I made good on my promise, right?"

...She did?...Well, yes, she did teach her. Lena thought that she didn't mention some things, such as the formula or how much energy one should dedicate, but in the end, those details were all discovered by her apprentice with no need for more external help. She, should she follow the instructions correctly, was now technically able to find the Phantom Blot.

Then why did she feel something wrong? She felt as if something wasn't quite...right, to put it simply. She expected a bigger fight with Magica. Harsher treatment. Little to no emotions, but it was just...meh. Nothing too big. She stared again the the elder witch. She was smiling. It was a smug smile alright, but it was a smile. It wasn't something she expected to see of Magica. Perhaps as a result of her disdain for her 'aunt' she, too, came to see her as incapable of being a person.

-"I guess so...", she murmured, knowing exactly where her former-teacher at this point was going. She prepared her amulet, not wishing to give it away. "Her name is Webby, by the way.", she added, not getting a response

-"I told you my brother was a good teacher.", her fifteen-minute trainer mumbled, more to herself than to anyone else, and Lena felt awkward. She stared back at her friends.

-"I...uh. Sorry about him. Dying. I guess.", she whispered but it caught the attention of Magica, and she looked positively shocked. "Don't look so shocked. Respect the dead and all that.", that came out wrong. So wrong. If she meant to disrespect him, she couldn't have done worse.

-"Heh...listen, sometimes faking death is a bit easier with magic on your side. If you're willing to share a bit more than the amulet, then maybe I can tell you about him.", she smiled again, though this was one of her more typical smiles, if still an actual smile. Huh. Curious

But just as the newly trained sorceress was about to say something, a 'zap' echoed in the swamp. There was light for a moment, and Magica had to jump to avoid the bolt that zapped a part of her hair and neck. Everyone turned in a split second to see a black-clothed figure with green eyes and a metallic glove on his right hand.

-"And I was just about to pick this four-leaved clover, too...", was the only sentence uttered for a solid minute. And by Gladstone of all people.

The Phantom Blot looked menacing. Pure, undiluted, unadulterated intimidation radiated off of his clothed figure. From afar, you wouldn't be blamed if you thought he was a medieval executioner. The metallic glove on his hand looked more electronic than medieval on closer inspection, but that didn't matter too much. His eyes, fully green by some method, conveyed little emotions, but there's something Lena sensed from him: Hatred.

-"Finally...", his clunky, distorted and terrifying voice announced, his footsteps calculated and his eyes focused. "It seems my searching has led me to the most vile of beings, at last.", he added, closing his fist.

-"The most vile of beings? Listen, I heard some nasty things about ducks, but come on man-", Gladstone tried countering, only to receive a bolt that knocked him over, making him grunt.

-"Not you, you imbecile! These WITCHES!", he cried, hatred drenching his words as he advanced. He most certainly had an accent...But Lena couldn't just pin-point it...though she thought she heard it sometime in the past...

-"These what now?", Magica repeated, apparently offended.

-"WITCHES!", he repeated, not slowing his advance as the group of ducks slowly backed off. "You come in with your magic, destroy cities with your undeserved power, and you...you're never satisfied! You always want more! You never leave something to the people who work for their power!", he ranted shooting a couple of bolts that forced the group the yell and retreat further to Magica's hut.

-"Oh. Witches. I think I still hate you, but a little less than when I thought you said-"

-"It would just be like you to show up now, huh?!", back to interrupting Magica, it was Lena who couldn't keep it in her head anymore. "I spend an hour with Magica to learn how to find you and you just show up like that?! Couldn't you have came in a little early?! Do you have any idea what kind of deal we made?!", she complained, ranting at him, and forcing him to do a double take on her words.

-"Not only are you a witch, but you are a sore loser. I could make my nonna's pasta with that much salt!", he mocked, doing a small laugh that almost sounded dead...like, the whole laughing part was there, but there was no spirit behind it. Just a sick, twisted glee.

-"Hey, hold it there for a minute, you're italian?", Magica asked, flabbergasted. Ah. Right. Sometimes Magica lost control of her British accent in front of Lena. Now she remembered. But really? This was the thing she asked about? Why would that matt-

-"Indeed, and my heart shall always remain there! It is why I find great pleasure and cleaning Napoli of your filth!", he growled, firing another shot which she barely avoided but backing her into the tree where her hut was located.

-"Oooh, you're digging your own grave here, you Blot! I am a proud Neapolitan, and the mere name is much more than wherever you're from!", she challenged, pointing an accusing finger as the other ducks stared at each other. They didn't know what exactly was unfolding in front of them, but it couldn't have been anything good.

-"Don't you dare insult Genova, you wretch!", he shot back, almost losing his nerves for a second before calming down. "No. I am much better than losing my nerves to a fiend like you! Prepare for justice!", he suddenly declared, and the speed of it made Magica unable to dodge the bolt he fired, punching her into Gladstone, who tried hiding behind her, and throwing the both of them into the trunk of her tree. She fell down with a hard 'crack', leaving Gladstone in a duck-shaped impression.

-"Wh-Why me...?!", he lamented before falling. The sorceress tried getting up but she limped.

-"Magica!", Lena yelled. Why did she yell? Why could she possibly yell?...Because if she dies, he's going after them. Definitely. She ran, trying to raise a shield to protect her from another, more frightening zap that would've hit her. Heck, even then, it shattered Lena's shield. Crud, this guy really isn't messing around anymore. But then a pink figure shined behind the Phantom. Yes! Webby was doing it!

-"How's this for justice!", she cried from behind him as she jumped, but he was good. Too good. He managed to spin his entire figure, raise his mechanical weapon and take a fighting pose at once, stopping his assailant's hit. Oh. This guy wasn't going to be any fun, was he?

-"You...Hah! It wasn't enough!", he bragged, pulling the battle-axe from his glove as his previous wielder suffered from the vibrations of hitting a metal. One powerful grab and swing from his glove sent Webby back to her friends, face in the dirt, and with no weapon.

-"What kind of justice are you hoping to achieve?!", cried Violet, hoping to buy them some time. It didn't work, and he only accelerated his assault, firing multiple electrical charges or whatever these were, forcing the ducks to separate.

-"Justice is not my primary concern, hummingbird. I am a criminal, after all, but if I can do my job and rid the world of this evil, then I shall take the initiative!", he calmly replied, not paying any attention to the fact that most of them were getting zapped or were running in terror. "But enough playing around, I do not wish to fail now!", he stopped, preparing what seemed to be a worse, more powerful form of his weapon.

-"Lena, do you think we can take him on?", Violet asked, trying to get them regroup.

-"Nope."

-"Webby, do you have any more weapons?", she turned to the Vanderquack, trying to assume to role of the leader.

-"Don't really think they're going to affect him.", she answered pulling out a few knives that looked like toothpicks comapred to her axe.

-"Mr.Gladstone-"

-"Don't have my luck; can't do anything.", came the reply.

-"...Magica?", she asked her voice a bit desperate.

-"My shotgun has one more round in it.", she declared, pointing it at their attacker, who finished upgrading himself and was about to shoot once again. "We're going to die, aren't we?"

-"Probably.", Lena answered her, watching the black-wearing man as he began shooting at them again.

Well. Nothing else to do but to face the music, as they say. Whoever 'they' is. And whatever that meant. And whatever that had to do with their situation. Oh, give her a break. She didn't have time to think about this fight of theirs. Magic versus one very wronged, apparently, and angry man and his technology. The fight of the century.

The Phantom versus The Sorceress. Time to see how long they can stay alive.

#ducktales #ducktales 2017 #magica de spell #phantom blot #webby vanderquack #violet sabrewing #lena de spell #fanfiction #my writing #head-canons

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twilightofthe · 4 years ago

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Aight, one last serious post for a bit. After that I think I might back off on some rants and stuff that I’ve been doing because I created this blog to be a positive place, and tbh, discussing stuff I don’t like just makes me upset, especially since I feel like I’m just shouting into either an unhearing void or at an audience that is watching and is distinctly unimpressed

Basically though, I wanted to apologize for the slightly salty posts I’ve made recently (and one like, yesterday lol) complaining about how people portray Anakin’s intelligence. I realize I came across as critical and accusatory of people who are just having fun and likely mean no harm, and it wasn’t fair of me to be all snappy about it. So yeah, I’m extremely sorry about that. I likely hurt people and that was not my intention. Please have fun and headcanon Anakin as anything you want. I love and support you and even if we can’t agree, we can def still be friends!

But, I will take this opportunity to kinda ramble a bit about my own personal experiences with this, and why I view Anakin the way I do, what his character means to me, and why it’s kinda exhausting sometimes to engage in fandom because I have the misfortune of having the unpopular opinion regarding a character, and how hard it is to respect other people’s takes when it seems that every time I give my own takes, it’s like I’m immediately shot down for them and refuted for the popular opinions, like I’m not allowed to believe this thing myself. Why I sometimes just gotta rant a little bit, and why no one should take it personal or as a criticism of them.

This below all delves very intricately into my own personal mindset and life experiences. It’s personal. Please remember this is a very personal post.

Now, to me, I totally understand Anakin has made every mistake in the world. I know he turns into a monster and hurts/(in)directly kills everyone he’s ever loved. I know that. I’m fully aware that he makes mistake after mistake after mistake. I know he’s a flawed character. I’m not saying he’s perfect. He’s far from it.

But at the same time, I can relate to parts of his character. His anxiety, his upset at not being able to live up to the standards he feels everyone’s putting on him when really no one is but him, the feeling of being constantly on the edge because you feel like your entire life is in a spiral and you don’t know how to stop it and every choice you make out of desperation makes things worse, how everyone around you just keeps making so much better choices and it’s like, why can’t I do that? What’s wrong with me? Why are they always right???????

And I love the fact that canonically, despite his utter disaster-ness, he has the potential to be good, to rise. That he is a canonical Gifted Kid, mega-intelligent but just totally unsure how to direct that so he flounders more often than not unless it’s in relation to his few specific interests, giving the feeling like I’m a fake and really there’s only one thing I’m good for. The need to do ANYTHING for validation from others because that’s what feeds you.

I’ve suffered this same insecurity and anxiety and self-hatred I can see in him my whole life, the same inability to properly manage my life like I’m supposed to and that everyone else seems to have figured out, how I could be so much more if I actually knew how to rise to the occasion instead of constantly crash and burn

I love Anakin so much because he is enough like me that I can sympathize and feel for him, but also different enough that when I see him tear down the path of self destruction, I can feel relief that I’m never at that point, and also sympathy that he fell that far (amidst my anger at him for hurting my other faves lol)

I LOVE that he has that ability to be smart and capable but just doesn’t know how to apply himself all the time, love it so much, and that’s why it’s a struggle sometimes when I feel that every time I try and say something showing off that side of him, like comment on something smart and creative he would have done, or something he HAS done right, immediately there’s people responding to me like UH NO ACTUALLY HE IS NOTHING BUT A PURE DUMBASS :) :) :))))))))))) HE DOESN’T HAVE THAT ABILITY/WOULD NOT BE ABLE TO DO THAT BECAUSE IT’S TOO SMART/SENSIBLE/GOOD FOR HIS POOR FEEBLE MIND, PERHAPS YOU MEANT SOMEONE ELSE MORE CAPABLE?

I’m not kidding about this. I said Anakin was a good cook once? I immediately got a response saying no, he can’t be, he’s a feral gremlin who eats bugs. I tried to start a convo about him having an emotional/meaningful conversation with one of his loved ones about something because he notices something wrong with them? Someone instantly refuted me because “nah he’s too clueless and oblivious to have that kind of emotional sensitivity ever”. I write something in a fic that shows Anakin doing something cool? In comes a guest commenter passive aggressively with something along the lines of “oh your Anakin is SO MUCH smarter and capable than he should be it’s almost OOC, but I’ll believe it for now haha”

I’ve got more instances I can recount, but I’m stopping here. I totally respect people’s headcanons, and right to have fun, I do. I cannot stress enough that people can and should write what the want. But to me, when it feels like people don’t always want to ever consider my takes on his character, when it’s like fandom is constantly churning out reminders of how much they believe he doesn’t have a brain, well, like

It’s like, when you relate to a character like that and keep getting your opinions and ways to relate shut down by the majority no matter what you do or say, it just feels like everyone is telling me “SMART PEOPLE don’t ever fail at things! People with REAL gifts and talents don’t ever waste them or make mistakes. If you’re struggling, if you crash and burn, if you don’t quite have your life together, it can only mean you’re just plain stupid and a failure for the rest of your life. As a Fool, you can’t ever be considered successful or do something right— because that would be doing something Smart and you have Proven Yourself Dumb. All of your accomplishments and thing you’ve done right can either be attributed to someone else deemed More Capable, or could have been done better by something else, so those good things don’t mean anything. Since you acted the fool once, a fool is all you’ll ever be.”

I’ve struggled with that kind of talk from other people and especially from my own insecurities my entire life.

And I know that’s not what people really mean, I know fans are just sharing their headcanons. I know no one wants to hurt anyone, they’re just making a joke and having fun! I call Anakin a dumbass all the time! SW fandom is 99% good people who just wanna play with their own toys and gush about things that they love! I know this is like 90% good faith!

But it gets harder to believe sometimes the Dumb Anakin headcanons are just innocent headcanons and not genuine beliefs when people Will Not let me have different ones without playfully— or not so playfully —reminding me of how wrong they think I am and what they think about his intelligence level and abilities.

And because my own personal history with anxiety and self-destruction, being overwhelmed with that talk really just hurts, and I will never be able to make that hurt response go away, no matter how irrational it is.

But yeah. That’s how I relate to Anakin. That’s why I see him this way. That’s why I cannot resist complaining sometimes. I’ve been at a very low point recently and these negative thoughts have just been worse so I’ve been more cranky about it, but I promise I won’t bring it up too much.

Thanks for listening.

I’m probs not gonna post anything “rant”-related on here for a very long time— or do my damned hardest to try not to.

#don’t worry y’all i won’t clog the tags with this #i just wanted to clarify this whole clusterfuck after a really useful conversation on discord #and i just had to get all my messy thoughts out here so ppl understand where i’m coming from #morai musings #one (1) hot mess

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problematiq · 5 years ago

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why are green day not punk anymore in your opinion? i'm so bad at keeping up with bands, literally they could have supported trump and i probs wouldn't have heard about it. or did you just mean that their music has changed?

lmao where do i even start oh boy

so this is all just my opinion, i don’t speak for anyone else. i just noticed a lot of people agreed with the point that they “sold out” or are expressing disappointment with their current approach.

it all depends on your definition of what “punk” even is i guess. people seem to disagree on that, which is like, fine. for some it’s just a music genre, for some it’s a lifestyle. and billie has expressed multiple times that he doesn’t even really consider his own music “pure punk”, but that it’s more of a lifestyle to him. personally, i don’t care if green day make “punk music”, i think their music has always been more than that and that was not the reason i liked them so much.

to me, punk is not just a style of music or an outfit you wear or ratty behaviour. it’s mostly about staying radically true to yourself and your ideals, sticking up for the little guy, not tolerating any kind of racism / sexism / homophobia / transphobia, it’s dyi, it’s thoughtfulness, it’s anticapitalism & anti greed, it’s integrity, and simply a counter-culture to any kind of bigotry.

and i still don’t think green day lost any of their integrity when signing onto a major label or producing a broadway musical or anything like that. i don’t think getting paid for your job makes you a capitalist or a fraud… if someone wants to make their living playing music, good for them and i’m happy if they get to do it. beats having a corporate job or starving.

it’s just that I don’t really consider it “punk” to collaborate with racists when you sell t-shirts with “no racism” written on the back or give big speeches on stage about how you don’t tolerate racism, and just never address it when your comments are filled with people calling you out, when other artists clearly can address it & own up to it or explain themselves. i don’t consider it punk to charge 240$ for a pit ticket to your show when in the early days of your career (after signing onto warner) you specifically made a point to keep them as affordable as possible. their current route seems completely disingenuous to me, like it’s nothing but a big marketing tactic coined by their management. i feel like they’re putting on an act to seem youthful and relevant, and they’re pretending to be someone else. i think their “political statements” have been half-assed for a while and that there is no real thought to it, but i’ve been trying to look over it so far because i still had faith in them. i think they have become puppets of a corporation to make a profit and they seem completely indifferent to it. i also don’t think it’s punk to have like 4 mansions and three yachts or whatever. i know they give back to the community but how much does one person really need? like they clearly have a shit ton of money, i don’t understand why they have to out-sell themselves to make even more. i don’t know why they think it’s necessary to go on tour with two other headliners just to squeeze some 2007-emo-fans dry who can’t wait to see FOB and GD on the same stage or produce garbage music (lmao i do NOT like it but whatever floats everyone’s boat)because it may be more mainstream popular, or even go to fuckin iHeart AGAIN after the last experience where they SAID it was a mistake because they don’t fit in there. why are they trying to prove? it all seems fake and embarrassing tbh. and i like to think that the band i started to love when i was younger was different. or they just made me believe they were.

it’s like… i look at other punk bands and clearly it is possible to stay true to yourself and experiment without losing your integrity on the way and i just ask myself why green day can’t do the same. there are people who enjoy their new stuff and what they’re doing regardless and that’s honestly so fine, like do whatever you want… but u can’t tell me it’s punk lol and no i do not take criticism on this

#anon #ask

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survivorbehemoth · 4 years ago

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Episode 15: "congrats daisy for winning season 7 of celestial: behemoth!” - Jules

congrats daisy for winning season 7 of celestial: behemoth!

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JIOFEOJIFEWOJIWOJI THAT SOUNDS SO BITTER BUT DYLAN SIR U HANDED HER THE GAME! HANDED IT TO HER! GOD! and its what she deserves!

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anyways. let it be known this was NOT MY FAULT.

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let the record show, before last night's tribal, I SAID SOMETHING WAS NOT SITTING RIGHT WITH MY SPIRIT!!!!!!!!!! AND???? what happened. look what happened.

Vocaroo

Vocaroo 2

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still practicing my slide puzzles WJIJIEFIJWJIFIFWJEJWIEEJWIF

OH MY GOD I HATE THIS GAME I HATE THIS GAME I HATE THIS GAME!!!

this final 4 is absolutely amazing and i literally love all of them so much, but that just makes things 10x worse. i think that playing my idol on daisy was a huge risk and the fact that it is now a final 2 makes things a bit more interesting. my ideal plan was to have daisy in the final 4 with me so that i wouldnt be the next target, but now that she won immunity it just didnt work out how i intended at all!!

voting out jules and szymon is purely going to come down to which one of them will sway my way and it's going to hurt to send one of them to jury no matter what, but i just feel like i came all this way and not making top 3 would just suck so badly. so yeah, this sucks. i hate that no matter what i do im going to be upsetting people and hurting feelings but... i guess that's just the game! at this point im not even sure if i can win against daisy but it seems like she will take me, it just depends on whether or not i stay loyal to her if i win FIC or if i take whoever is with me in final 3.

much to think about, BUT I JUST CANT BELIEVE I MADE IT THIS FAR !!!!

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Jules is voted out 3-1. She becomes the 8th member of our jury.

Watch the Cast Assessment take place below:

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Szymon is voted out by Daisy. He becomes the final member of our jury.

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idk thought this would be cute to include my voting log and stuff hehe <3 https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1RiA0RUWX4TRpqBTgRzLJJ3fHu2jBqZ-bCJozFd3HcRs/edit?usp=sharing

Jules: https://youtu.be/6zKeJuOJKeY

https://youtu.be/5dV_-X6Rv2U

https://youtu.be/N5tnq-4QAT8

someone (zach) asked me to rank the jurors from nicest to meanest...so here we go. ily all <3 <3

1. seamus (this will def come as a surprise, but seamus was the most levelheaded and nice one on the jury. he really never made a bitter comment even though he had every right to, especially at me/daisy/dylan and really anyone who was in after him except chips. like. he was the only person to reach out in pms after and it was immediate, he really comforted me and i really admire men who can have like good relationship w/ women that are platonic??? i know he's been like terrible in the past and i did call him on some stuff in hydravivor and ill be the FIRST to admit that i called him a crackhead on a daily basis but i think he's grown a lot!!!!!! idk. i think he's also the MOST self aware!!!! im a seamus stan, what about it?)

2. brandan (while brandan was kinda irrelevant game wise this season -- but not in our hearts -- he was very objective and a peacemaker. he had good reason to be MIA too so the fact that he got as far as he did means to me that he did form some strong social connections. and he did!!! with me, i think w/ conor, so idk, he had a role like i did in the game imo. i really liked him and he really brought a fresh perspective on things!!!)

3. szymon (he's only not ranked higher bc he's pissed off rob and he stands his ground a lot more outwardly than the first two, at least in the jury chat. also he's not had as much time as a juror. but even then, i think szymon is not a bad guy like some of the ppl make him out to be. like, idk, i think he made a mistake on a game level and he even admitted it and idk he's a legend. truly. im so glad to have met him and i think he was a really nice juror to have around while he was ACTUALLY around bc he stood up for me/daisy the way seamus did)

4. lovelis (lovelis makes some pointed comments but.....he's not dumb at all and so i don't think he's been bitter. also his pointed comments have been funny and mostly radiating the energy of the other Bitter Jurors so idk. i really like him on a personal level as well and have for a while so idk. i dont KNOW KNOW him but he's never been the type to make harsh comments without them having some merit to them. so i kinda trust his judgement even though he wasnt in the game long/an early merge boot. idk i think he's open minded enough and he's also someone who admits when he's done a Lil Too Much but he's really lovely. just competitive.)

5. chips (i dont think chips is MEAN per se, in fact, i dont think he has a mean bone in his body on a personal level. like WFIJFJIFWE I DONT KNOW HOW ELSE TO SAY IT HES SO FUCKING NICE!!!!!!! but thats why it's so funny to see him in games bc he's a lil lying, a lil backstabby and sometimes he's a lil passive aggressive. but its not undeserved. its also a pisces thing WEFJIEIEJWEFJIWEF i think what i saw in the jury house was sometimes chips going along w/ things, but i dont know, i really do not know much about chips game and ill probs ask him more afterwards?? but idk he was REALLY nice to me tho so FWIJFWEWFIFW i just dont trust him in games.......i dont know whats on his mind half of the time......)

I WANNA SAY FOR THE NEXT 3 MEN THEYRE HEAVILY INFLUENCED BY THEIR FIRE SIGN PLACEMENTS SO while i know some of them do hold resentment, its a lot easier to deal with and work with and with all 3 of them we've talked it out with/are going to talk it out. only #8 has been the MOST stubborn but idk imma let him do his thing & try not to pass too much judgement u know cause i dont need to waste my braincells on that

6. conor (knowing conor's astrological placements makes this make sense to me. but i wanna say that i think he's the type of leo to like be upfront, get it out, vent, and be fine? which is why i respect him a lot and i think we do have a mutual respect for each other. some of the comments he made were kinda rude tho and him fake liking astrology for social game was SO UGLY TO ME!!!! like i'll clown him for it for as long as i know him now cause....JOKE'S ON HIM!!!!!!! WJOEFWEOWEFO but that was kinda mean but def conor's come around and seen the light / has also reached out to me to talk. he's also admitted he left a mean speech in sbbb9 and regretted it so i think he might just shoot off at the mouth a bit. but BETTER THE DEVIL U KNOW THAN THE ONE U DONT and i appreciate the transparency NOW as opposed to the fakeness of him saying he liked astrology for social game. THIS IS A HILL I WILL DIE ON!!!!! im a fan of leos tho and he's a leo moon like me. so. i think we'll be fine. )

7. rob (i actually really REALLY like rob on a personal level but i really do not know if i could play another game with him, at least survivor, id be open to playing bb. i think ill say that the best thing about rob is that he's also apologized, was one of the first to when i confronted them all, me and him have a good personal relationship tbh!! but some of the game comments he made were p harsh and he's definitely a lil bitter but again, he's admitted it, i think while he's more up front -- i dont think i ever wanna be on his bad side in a game. EVER!!! cause we didnt even have any loyalty to each other in the game but he was SO harsh on my game like it was wild bc i dont think id ever be that harsh to ANY OF THEM ABOUT THEIR GAMES LIKE THAT???? anyways. its fine bc again he's apologized and he's owned it but PHEW he got a lil bit of a sharp tongue. really eloquent tho!!!!!!!!!!! love hearing him speak)

8. gage (last but least the southern belle himself................this man an aries and i dont know his other signs but him being an aries man is enough. they POP OFF!!!!!! a lot of times there's some truth to it, sure, but sometimes they just be popping off and FOR WHAT!!!!! i do understand gage's frustrations though but even he apologized for being too mean in HIS FUTURE FUCKING CONFESSIONALSSSSSSSS TO MEEEEEE so. idk. he's got an issue with letting things go in games and miss annajane calls him on a lot of BS and it does NOT seem to really knock him down but. gage is really wht u see is what u get, doesnt really own his faults but at least u kinda know where ur at w/ him. but he's still probs the meanest one in there but i do understand from a game level why he was so fucked up about it, especially after hearing FTC. its just that. i understand his position. BUT HE NEEDS TO TAKE A XANAX SOMETIMES I S2G GAGE I WILL GIVE YOU ONE!!! girl it is NOT that serious!!!!!!)

also forgot to mention that i admitted to gage that chris from s1 was NOT actually my brother and his jaw was on the floor <3 I GOT TO DO ONE TROLL THING RIGHT!!!!!! rip me/seamus' showmance serious!!!!!!)

okay just to add onto my last confessional -- the songs i think represent me best from this playlist game wise are: - perfect for you - punchin' bag - stayin' alive - flip - femme fatale/future nostalgia (for the girls alliance that never was....rip but also me/daisy at merge vibes) - X - the shortchange - TAKE ME AS I AM!!!!! THAT SONG IS THE ONE THATS BECOME MY SONG!!!! for this game especially!!!!! - over yet (the lyrics literally speak for themselves) - tough on myself (sorry for stealing ur song vincent) - seven devils - villains pt. 1 (i dont think i was a villain but i did stuff in this game that i usually dont and would consider villainous for myself FEWIWFEJIFEW i was in my feelings!) - passion & pain taste the same when i'm weak (me coming into the jury house and realizing they'd all snatched my wig w/ the edges and the glue.....i DID cry to this song for at least 2 hours! yes i did! WIFJWJIWEIJE) - tar ('under the stars -- pull yourself from the tar'. at the end of the day, this season was fucking stacked and there wasn't one person who was a bad player at all. at all.stars, if you will. i was under a lot of stars and from all the breakdowns in my game to me actually breaking down -- i GOTTA PULL MYSELF FROM THE TAR!!!! learn!! grow!! be better!!)

TOP 5 (not 'perfect for you'): - punchin' bag - take me as i am - over yet - tough on myself - tar

good for my whole journey imo!! the last 3!!! okay this is my ACTUAL last confessional okay thank u for everything!!! bye!!!

https://youtu.be/T5wRzWwlOp8

and here's my personal playlist for the org: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2E8KGCo1SrBgoJIQ9DycfM?si=96PWq-6ERCyisacQr3zPww

it is literally an hour and a half until the winner reveal and i really just have no idea what's going to happen. like in the back of mind i just have a feeling that im losing bc, yeah you know self-deprecation woo! but yeah idk i think i really gave this game my all and while i dont think i played it flawlessly, i still think i played a strong game i can be proud of :,)

having it be a live final tribal for my first ever like, jury questioning was just--- ugh wild but i actually think it went really well. just based on what people were saying it definitely seemed as if some of the jurors didnt really want to see me and daisy at the end or like, really werent consider voting for me but i think i was definitely able to sway some people who were willing to listen and definitely gave some of the jurors something to think about. so whether or not i win i do think that i had a really great final tribal performance, maybe it was even enough to sway enough people into giving me their vote?? WHO'S TO SAY

anyways this has been such a wild experience and it's surreal to think that it's ending in like, a little over an hour but no matter what happens i can say confidently that i will be able to look back on this season fondly and will be leaving it with my head held high bc I REALLY DID THIS LIKE!!! I REALLY MADE IT TO THE END!! WOW I STILL CANT GET OVER IT HAHAHA!! but yeah bye forever <33

Rob’s Last Video: https://youtu.be/X3krxxfJ3oo

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Daisy wins in a 7-2 vote!

#superspooky

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robot-unicorn-attack · 5 years ago

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alicia’s plotting ideas/notes??

SNOW (MARIVANA)

ideas & stuff!! feel free to message me either here or on urstyle or wherever else u have me, or comment directly on this post, to plot! ill put finalized notes w/ rest of snow’s info once we have it down :)

Sky - so since seraphina’s a newer racer, she and marivana don’t know each other super well? but they’re almost complete opposites, in terms of like racing specialties, and marivana doesn’t feel threatened by seraphina in any way. she probably keeps her distance whenever they aren’t doing things their agency has sent them on?

It would be kind of fun to say that maybe, as a publicity stunt, twilight’s official statement is that snow has been mentoring sky behind the scenes?

and they have to pretend that’s true, even though it’s not lol

LOL but it would be funny if one day marivana showed up at the track while seraphina was doing stuff and was just like, “so twilight wants me to teach you something that makes it look like i’ve actually been helping u. u free atm?”

but overall I don’t think marivana has too many strong opinions about seraphina, unless we want to create some kind of drama?

Ice - premade; tbd

Supernova - Marivana is…pretty indifferent? when it comes to Supernova. She knows who she is and what she’s done, of course-who doesn’t?-but if you think that she’d be starstruck and/or falling over herself when Supernova’s around her…well, you’d be wrong. Marivana’s had multiple trusted parties tell her that she’s just as good as Supernova was, at her peak, so she knows that she’s not a threat-for now, at least. Marivana’s a bit wary of the other racer, but also a bit curious to see as to where this comeback will lead.

So, depending on how much of the wedding and divorce was public....Marivana def would remember 1) the wedding, and 2) not giving a shit about it

The 2 of them have raced together, right at the very beginning of Marivana’s career? like 10+ years ago? and if As even remembers all that girly snow princess stuff, she could be like “lmao so twilight really pulled a 180 on her”

AHHHH so I know I never made this explicitly clear because I suck as a human being but - the deal with unicorns is that agencies/manufacturers/etc say that they’re just robots? agencies probably actually believe it, but in terms of the manufacturers they might be vaguely aware of otherwise but also don’t want to jeopardize any profits so they keep that shit on the DL

but obviously for ppl like Mari/As who have been riding for p much their entire life, they can tell when horses are distressed, happy/content, etc?

and robot unicorns are basically horses in terms of how sentient they are?

so i have no fucking idea when this would happen, but the 2 of them mutually acknowledging that RUR is pretty fucked up for the unicorns?

also like....IT WOULD BE SO CUTE if the two of them sort of rolled their eyes at the same time about some kind of story regarding another rando racer who quit maybe a lil after As did (so the newer racers aren’t familiar with her)? and then they realize that they both rolled their eyes at the same time LOL

honestly just being Tired Grandmas together

anyway. @interluxetumbra LMK what u think!!!

Sunbeam - tbd

Flower - Marivana knows exactly what 𝑅 𝐼 𝒮 𝐸 is pulling with Flower (her own agency did the same thing to her, after all), and she is not fooled at all. She’s not stupid; in the robot unicorn racing industry, nobody is completely, utterly unknown when they debut unless they had no prior experience with robot horses/unicorns in the past. Marivana knows that Flower probably had to work her butt off to stay with 𝑅 𝐼 𝒮 𝐸, and she would bet her right hand that the image that Flower puts out to the public is just that - an image.

*chanting* AURIVANA AURIVANA AURIVANA

is the lil club plot we have how they meet/1st time they actually talk 2 ea other????

speaking of which - how do we want to write that? collab in a gdoc???

& then they just keep coincidentally running into ea other randomly????

aura saying something super Flower-esque and marivana just rolling her eyes and being like, “ok great now tell me what you really think about __” ??? lol

aura somehow discovering that marivana is into BOTANY, of all things????

maybe this is when she makes some sort of dry remark about the bio for Flower on the RISE website? “[Flower] grew up in a lush green meadow, hidden away from prying eyes by miles and miles of ice. How Flower managed to get the ice to melt for long enough to plant flowers and trees will always be a mystery.” and marivana’s like “lol magic my ass there’s literally no fucking way”

she explains it with a good amount of scientific jargon thrown in and aura’s just like watttttttttttttt :0000

literally hit me up ANYTIME i already adore them

also - their aesthetics as racers? put together? a+++++++++

OMG THIS IS LIKE WAY IN THE FUTURE BUT LIKE, we should say that their secret relationship somehow ends up going public for the ~drama~??? and instead of being super freaking pissed off, both of their agencies are just like “lmao okay ice queen x fairy princess? best ship” and use it for publicity?????

Flame - Marivana knows about 1) the image that she projects, and 2) that this image is pretty true to who Flame really is, for the most part. Her verdict? Flame could prove to be annoying, if she gets relevant while Marivana is still in the industry as a racer. Marivana doesn’t know what life not racing would be like, but she’s well-aware that she’s the oldest racer out there (well, besides Supernova, who doesn’t count. She’s making a comeback, after all), and that retirement is probably not too far out in her future. So, if Flame is still around within the next 5-10 years, then Marivana might start worrying about her. For now, she’s just the irritating racer with ʟᴀᴢᴇʀ who won’t ever stop causing a scene.

So they haven’t really interacted much yet, do we wanna say?

they’re wary of each other because both their unicorns specialize in high power/strength so they’re like, more directly in competition?

are they going to engage in the RUA equivalent of a twitter fight??? in a publicity stunt that both of their agencies are putting on?

maybe snow has once insulted kehlani in an interview??? though it was fake/staged/scripted by her agency so she doesn’t actaully feel that way but ya know. doin it for the vine

and kehlani responds in kind, maybe at the behest of lazer, maybe not?. and it just keeps going???

but ya, marivana prob finds her personality kinda annoying so would generally avoid her unless kehlani approached first

Nyx - so like, snow probably thinks sol is way too flashy and all over the place, & does not engage her ever? she knows of the rumors of foul play, ofc, b/c who doesn’t, but she assumes that the rumors are super blown out of proportion (as rumors tend to be)?? and snow knows that if sol ever tries to target her/other ice world racers specifically, twilight will literally strong-arm lazer into dropping her. so she’s not that worried about that stuff????

definitely thinks her razor-sharp precision with U-800 is something to be admired, though, even if it’s not the flashiest skill like dressage or speed

OMG LOL spoiler alert but the 2nd event is a race on lava world, so they’re all on the main LW training/practice facilities in the days leading up to the race???? and we TOTALLY need to have them do that weirdly super aggressive staredown/pre-game smack talk sesh that they do in super extra sports anime LOL

Widowmaker - snow’s heard of her, knows of her, has competed against her, but since they both tend to keep to themselves they haven’t really talked? it could be potentially cool if eleni guessed about/found out about what actually happened with marivana’s 1st unicorn?? OMG DRAMA but what if she actually knew of the armed thief? who was on ice world for whatever reason lmfao we can hand-wave it. bonus points if she’s pissed that 1st unicorn killed the person?????????? lol

and it could be POTENTIALLY FUN to write a scene with them where eleni basically calls her out on the fact that, yeah marivana fucking hates twilight for deactivating the first unicorn so why tf does she still race for them/earn them so much money???

also marivana has literally no retirement plans atm so.....i have NO FREAKING IDEA if this would ever be possible or not, but if she somehow?? gets involved? with the people who wanna fuck up TEF govt for not giving a single shit about black hole ??? ? ??? ?? thru eleni????????//

idk dude feel free to just be like “lmao alicia that would never happen” if it feels too OOC!!! it’s also like 4 am & i’m only half coherent so ;D

but i literally have no idea in what context the calling out would be in!!! maybe if marivana saw some top sekrit info that eleni might have access to and was like “i won’t tell anyone at TWILIGHT if you tell me why you have this”? and eleni is like *eyeroll* “not like u have any reason to like ur agency”

Taglist: @ayzrules @bebemoon @jay-swagsby @filthysoulls @shiftyprincess @kzombi3 @now-on-elissastillstands

#plotting #snow #marivana #this is....so incoherent #and i am sorry #racers #writing #i guess??? lol

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musicanddancingthroughlife · 6 years ago

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Protecting the Spiderling

Okay, this is new for me. It’s only, like, the 2nd MCU fic I’ve written, and it’s the first Peter fic I’ve done. So be nice, ya? I might make this into a series. I kind of had other plans for it, other things I wanted to explore and I think it would be fairly easy to continue, but we’ll see what happens. This is also one of my longest stories, and it’s probs not very good, as I wrote the first half while working a shift at the call center, so I was a little distracted.

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“…Peter?” What are you doing on the ceiling?”

Somehow, Peter had been so distracted that he didn’t hear Bucky approach. Of course, like an idiot, he crashed to the ground. Unfortunately, Sam had walked in with Bucky and had witnessed the fall. E immediately started up with the insults and teasing jokes.

Peter flushed. He knew they didn’t mean it (he was pretty sure at least) but that absolutely didn’t make him feel better. But hey. That was just him being too sensitive, right? He could work through that, no problem.

“Awww,” Sam cooed mockingly. “Was our little spider-baby too busy playing with his toys to hear us coming?”

…It was weird how Peter had heard similar comments from Tony, yet this was far more insulting. How did he make his voice so scathing? And why did an Avenger, of all people, remind him of high school bullies?

Clint walked up behind Sam and Bucky, cackling loudly. “Oh, you should see your face!” Somehow, Peter managed to turn even redder, even as Natasha entered the room and glanced up at the ceiling coolly, lips pursed in displeasure. Peter couldn’t help but freeze when her eyes fell on him.

“What are you doing?” The ice in her voice was enough to send a weak Spidey-sense tingle down his spine.

And he immediately felt guilty.

No way would the Avengers attack or try to hurt him! He was just a kid. Plus, he was at least 57% sure doing so would bring Tony’s wrath down on them. It was his Tower, anyway.

And oops, Natasha was still waiting for a response. Clint and Sam had resumed their giggles, and even Bucky’s lips were starting to curl upwards.

“Uhhh… homework?” Natasha’s eyebrow only lifted her and Sam and Clint abruptly shut up. And now his Spidey-sense was going off for real.

Peter tried to keep an eye on Bucky. If anyone attacked, he would be the biggest threat. He tired to convince himself that they wouldn’t, but years of being bullied by Flash and his friends had taught him otherwise.

“On the ceiling?” Natasha’s tone was dangerous. Clint and Sam took a step towards him. Peter shifted his foot, prepared to make a getaway if necessary. Bucky’s eyes narrowed.

“Well, I just—I mean. Tony, Mr. Stark, I mean, never said I – I just. I’m not in anybody’s way that way, so I thought I could—” he felt a shift in the air above him and quickly snatched a falling textbook out of the air. More fell, and in the midst of trying to save his downed homework and laptop, he saw Clint easily shooting them all down. A surge of anger welled up inside him, but the wave of insecurity that followed closely behind overshadowed it. Bucky watched with cold indifference, while Sam was giggling, and Clint was sporting a s mug smirk. A couple of is arrows “strayed” (or so Clint claimed, but everyone knew that was impossible) and shredded through Peter’s newly-finished worksheets and a couple of essays.

Bucky watched in silent fascination as Peter’s expression shuttered closed. There was a prickle of guilt that he tried to ignore, but it proved difficult when he noticed the kid’s eyes were glinting with tears. And anger. It was incredible to watch how, even in the middle of a rush to save papers and books, the kid processed through his emotions. First came the horror at what was happening, accompanied with the anger. But there was also a hint of guilt and insecurity. Eventually, Clint ran out of arrows. The attack truly didn’t last long, and Peter was able to save everything except for the shredded homework. Looking at the tatters of paper littering the floor, Bucky realized it was probably a lost cause for those assignments. But… No one else seemed concerned, except for Peter. He was staring at the floor, too, blinking rapidly. Bucky shook his head. Whatever, the kid was smart, he would be fine. Probably wouldn’t take him long at all to redo the assignments.

Finally, Peter glanced back up. “I’m sorry.”

…What did he say? Hell, even Sam and Clint looked gob-smacked at that one. The kid didn’t really seem to notice, just slowly and carefully collected his books and gathered them into his backpack. Bucky hadn’t ever noticed before, but as he watched Peter stack the books in, he realized the bag was bulging in an attempt to fit them all. The spider-boy avoided their eyes as he continued, “I honestly didn’t realize I was in anyone’s way. I like to spread everything out, and the table…”

Bucky had a flash of Bruce’s work and research, drafts for reports and for a new book, all scattered on the table. There wouldn’t have been any room for the kid to study there, not to mention that Bruce had been feeling on edge and aggravated lately, and would have preferred the quiet. Bucky could relate.

“—didn’t want to bother him, but I couldn’t just spread out on the floor, who knows who I could’ve bothered with that? It would be so inconvenient and I didn’t want—” Sam interrupted rudely. “Why didn’t you just stay in your room then?” Bucky was taken aback by the aggressive tone. It seemed the kid was, too, since he just stared at him owlishly for a moment, backpack handle clenched tightly in his hand. He glanced to both Bucky and Natasha, perhaps hoping for intervention or even assistance, but neither moved. They simply waited for an answer.

The kid’s shoulders slumped. “I. I didn’t want…” he faded off into a mumble, but Clint was merciless. “Speak up, baby, we can’t understand mumbling.” Bucky cringed inwardly at the harshness directed at the miserable teenager.

“I didn’t… I didn’t want to be alone.” And though his voice grew quieter towards the end of the statement, the four of them were still able to hear it. Bucky felt himself grow sick when he caught the gleeful looks Sam and Clint were exchanging. Natasha scoffed and left the room. Peter looked resigned, but he still refused to let the tears fall.

“Awww is poor wittle Petey afraid of being alone?”

“You afraid of the dark, too, kid?”

“What kind of superhero needs someone around in order to feel safe?”

“Are you always gonna rely on others to protect you?”

Bucky paid little attention to the petty morons choosing to instead focus on whatever Peter was gonna do next. At first, he just stood there. His fist was clenching the handle, tensing and loosening rhythmically. His head was bowed forward, but Bucky still didn’t think he was crying. Not yet. His shoulders and jaw were tense, his stance rigid. When their words received no further reaction, Sam and Clint fell silent. And that’s when Peter lifted his head.

He still looked so soft. So bright and hopeful. There was a hardness in his eyes, but it had also given way to insecurity and guilt. Bucky held his breath, somehow knowing he wasn’t going to like what came next.

“I really am sorry, guys. I didn’t realize I would still be in everyone’s way. I’ll just…” Peter hesitated, and yep, Bucky was absolutely going to hate this. “I’ll just stay in my room. Um.” Peter glanced again at the ruined homework around his feet. “If it’s not a bother, and if Mr. Stark asks, could you tell him I’m just gonna study and then… and then go to bed early? I’m not… I’m not feeling too good.” And despite the brightness in his eyes, it was obvious that the smile he shot at them was fake and forced. Before Bucky could say anything or stop him, the kid had vanished, presumably to go hide in his room.

Immediately, Clint and Sam began complaining about the mess left in the room, debating calling the kid back and demanding he clean it up, or calling Tony in there to report what his “star child” did, using the mess as evidence. Bucky took two steps forward, knelt, and began gathering the remains himself. When the other two dared to complain at him, he merely glared at them. He wasn’t too bothered when the look led to them ditching their previous plans of a movie in favor of going out to eat instead. He was too busy staring at the tidy scrawl visible on the papers, trying to work out what Peter had been working on. From the looks of it, one of the assignments at least was on WWII. Bucky smiled to himself.

That was an easy enough fix, he told himself. He stood and dusted himself off, intending to find Stevie and then visit the spider-kid in his room. Once they redid that assignment, maybe they could figure out something to help the kid with the other assignments.

#mcu #mcu fic #marvel cinematic universe #peter parker #i don't know where it falls in chronology sorry #bucky barnes #bucky and peter are friends #at least they will be #peter & bucky #not clint friendly #not sam friendly #not really natasha friendly tbh #but i love them all #just wanted to use them for the story sorry #mywriting #jessi rambles #tagging is fun but idk what to tag as lol

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