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irondad-defensesquad · 2 years ago

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Take all your chances while you can

Fandom: MCU

Rating: G

Relationships: Tony & Peter

Characters: Tony Stark, Peter Parker; MINOR - Morgan Stark, Happy Hogan

Summary: Morgan is asking him to read her a story, so Tony checks her bookshelf, noticing there aren’t only regular books, but hand-made ones as well. Curious, Tony takes one of them…

“Irondad and Spiderson”.

Tony feels something in his head. Like a spark. A lightbulb that flickers.

Since coming back, Tony has always felt something is missing.

Word count: 1.500

AO3

A/N: Yeah, it's an idea I posted here earlier. It turned out to be way shorter than I imagined.

Disclaimer - I did not see No Way Home and I refuse to. DO NOT INSIST.

TRIGGER WARNINGS - past character death, canonical character death, and grief/mourning

DO NOT SHIP TONY AND PETER. P/ROSHIP DNI.

He’s getting by.

After spending such a long time in the hospital, battling against death yet again, Tony Stark is back home with his family. He was in a coma for most of the past months, unfortunately missing his daughter’s birthday. She didn’t mind and instead they made a super special birthday party when he came home. It was very fun.

If not for one thing missing.

No, someone.

Tony can’t tell how he knows that someone is gone. When he invited people, he knew there was one that he wanted them to attend the most. He knew there was someone he’s been quite literally dying to see again.

And yet he has no idea.

Regardless, Tony lives by.

Until one night…

Morgan is asking him to read her a story, so Tony checks her bookshelf, noticing there aren’t only regular books, but hand-made ones as well. Curious, Tony takes one of them…

“Irondad and Spiderson”.

Tony feels something in his head. Like a spark. A lightbulb that flickers.

It’s him, as Iron Man, flying while the… “Spiderson” is shooting webs next to him.

“Daddy?” Morgan calls him.

He stares at the cover intensely.

Only for him to realize that this is probably a character Morgan created.

“Oh, I just found this comic of yours,” Tony smiles, trying to ignore the spark inside him. “Irondad and Spiderson.”

Except Morgan frowns as well.

“I didn't draw that,” she says.

The spark grows bigger.

“Wh… What do you mean?” Tony questions. This doesn’t make sense. “It has your name in it, see?”

Even as he gestures at it, Morgan only shakes her head with conviction.

“Nope. Never saw that in my life.” Although saying it kind of dramatically, she’s very serious.

Tony opens the comic, the first page introducing Iron Man and…

Spider-Man.

“Your friendly neighborhood hero that always saves the day. But he gets in a lot of trouble, so Iron Man has to take care of him. The two grow closer and they become like a dad and his son.”

Tony didn’t realize he said that out loud.

“Read it! Read it!” Morgan says excitedly, maybe enjoying the premise.

Despite the millions of questions in his head, Tony clears his throat and begins.

Peter Parker, also known as Spider-Man, is a regular teenager who lives with his Aunt May. He was bitten by a radioactive spider that gave him spider powers. One day, all of a sudden, Tony Stark arrives at his home to offer him to fight by his side, since he sees great potential in him. Their first fight is against… Captain America. They didn’t win, but Tony wants to keep in contact with Peter. The kid begs him to be an Avenger, so much that he messes up a lot and he loses his suit. Then, Peter proves himself to be a true hero by fighting a super villain named The Vulture with nothing but his homemade resources. And he also proves to be humble when he declines becoming an Avenger when Tony offers him. Despite this, Peter and Tony remain in contact, and might even grow closer beyond the superhero life.

The comic ends there.

“I liked it!” Morgan says.

Tony, he…

He…

“Daddy, are you crying?”

Is he?

He only realizes that when a tear falls on the comic.

“Oh,” Tony dries his eyes, except more tears keep coming. “I- I don’t know why I’m–”

Regardless, Morgan has scooted closer to him to wrap her small arms around his neck.

“It’s okay,” she whispers. “It’s gonna be okay.”

The comic falls from his hand, landing on the floor.

Tony is shaking so much.

Why?

Why is he?

Why does this emptiness hurt ?

He finds out there are more Irondad and Spiderson editions Morgan made. Quite a few.

They’re filled both with action-filled plots and slice of life moments. Like Peter and Tony watching movies together. Going to the lab to update their suits. Spending time with the bots. Times when Peter nonchalantly dismisses his wounds so he doesn’t worry Tony.

All of these comics, they…

They’re so familiar .

Somehow.

Because he knows Morgan wouldn’t come up with such… specific stories involving her dad. Sure, his daughter is extremely creative, as most children are. But there’s also the fact Morgan doesn’t recall drawing these comics in the first place. Pepper doesn’t remember seeing her making them, either.

Something is wrong about all this.

It’s like Tony is being haunted by a ghost. A ghost named Peter Parker.

A rather familiar sensation, too.

He even checks his files, just in case. But there’s… nothing. Like a great portion has been removed without notice. F.R.I.D.A.Y didn’t detect any anomaly that could’ve sniped them.

He only reaches more dead ends, no matter how hard he tries.

It doesn’t make sense. Why can’t Morgan remember? Why can’t Tony remember?

Why–

His phone is vibrating in his pocket.

Happy.

Tony hasn’t heard from him in a while, since the party.

“Oh, hey,” he picks it up. “Were you taking another vacation from me?”

Happy laughs. “I wish.”

“Hey,” Tony pretends to be offended.

“No, really… a lot has been going on.”

“Is that so?”

“Yeah, I’ve been busy taking care of this kid.”

Tony frowns. “Kid? You have a kid?”

“No, not that kind of kid, Tony.”

“Then what kind of kid?”

“He’s… someone’s nephew. I knew this woman named May, who unfortunately… passed away recently. She was the one who raised this kid, and he doesn’t have any family left, so I’m looking after him instead.”

Tony’s inner lightbulb flickers again.

May.

Aunt May.

Who has a nephew…!

“Happy,” Tony says seriously, “what’s the kid’s name?”

“Oh, his name is Peter. Why?”

“His name is Peter Parker?”

“Yes, Tony. Do you know him?”

He stares at Morgan’s comic in his hand, staring most specifically at the panel of Peter and Tony’s first meeting.

“Is he there with you?” Tony asks.

“Wh- yes, he is.”

“Okay. I’ll be there in five.”

“Wait, Tony–”

He hangs up immediately, leaving the comics and questions behind for his loyal Iron Man suit. He makes sure to text Pepper to let her know where he’s going.

Indeed, he arrives in five minutes at Happy’s apartment. Tony barely gives him any mind, instead looking for the kid.

“Where is he?” He demands.

“Tony, you’ve got to tell me what’s going on,” Happy stops him. “Do you know Peter?”

“I think… I do.”

Seeing the pain in his tone and his eyes, Happy’s expression softens.

“Just… go easy on him. He’s in a rough shape. After everything that’s happened to him…”

Maybe that has to do with why everything is wrong. Why everything seems empty.

Happy is guiding him to a room with a closed door, not before he knocks on it.

“Peter?” He calls. “Someone wants to see you.”

They both wait.

Eventually, they hear slow steps coming to the door.

And it opens…!

Revealing a teenager whose curls are completely messy, his brown eyes are exhausted and heavy, and he looks… sick. As in, mentally sick.

Still, Tony can tell the kid also has a lightbulb in him since he seems to brighten up with his presence.

“M-Mr. Stark,” Peter says with emotion .

Peter knows Tony.

He knows .

He even looks like he’s going to cry at any moment.

But…

Instead, he forces a smile and offers a hand to shake.

“It’s nice to meet you,” Peter says.

Tony stares at his hand.

Then at his face.

Peter looks broken.

So…

Tony hugs him.

As tight as he can.

“Mr. Stark?!” Peter blurts out.

Hugging him…

Is familiar, too.

It’s warm and precious.

It’s warm like all the hot chocolates they drank together. Like the laughter they shared during movie nights. Like the moments of comfort after bad days and harsh battles. Like their first hug in five years.

Tony sniffs.

“I remember, Peter,” he whispers. “I remember you.”

The kid freezes.

“Y-You… remember me?” Peter’s voice is tiny and watery.

“I do.”

Peter loses it.

He’s crying like never before. Like he has held this inside him for too long.

“I’m so sorry, Peter,” Tony says, despite not knowing what happened for his kid to be in such a state. “I should’ve been there for you.”

“I-I-I’m sorry,” Peter sobs. “I’m so sorry, I’m…”

“Shhh…” Tony rubs his back. “I’ve got you, Pete.”

They refuse to let each other go.

“I m-missed you,” Peter says.

“I missed you, too…” Tony pauses dramatically “... my Spiderson.”

Peter snorts. “What?”

“What?”

“That’s so dumb,” Peter giggles.

“I know you like it.”

He only faces Peter again to see him smile.

“Yeah,” the teen sniffs, his face a wet mess.

Tony smiles back, content.

He found him.

He found his lost son.

Now, whatever happened, he’s not sure how they’re going to deal with it now. What he’s sure of, is that he’s taking care of his kid again.

Like Irondad once did.

#irondad #tony stark #peter parker #morgan stark #happy hogan #marvel cinematic universe #fanfiction #marvel fanfiction #death tw #my fics #fics

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eek-a-tron · 7 months ago

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I often see and enjoy that you add "comics loki has a lot going on mkay" to old timey comics!loki posts. What are some of the things that come to mind at the top of your head? ^_^

Heh, my yammertags and I thank you!

I'm honestly not suuuuuuper familiar with Loki's classic comics oeuvre or pre-MCU Thorverse comics stuff. Shallow dives only, I'm afraid. Behold: I doth gatekeep myself! :p

It's just, whenever I see any classic comics Loki around here, there's always something wild going on, mkay! Like perma-scowling, or vaudevillian-level declaring, or Machiavellian plotting, or being an actual gremlin, or tree, or whatever. It's like... wow, what a brightly-colored mess, what's his campy myths-based deal? Big mad and a big jerk? Literally Iago? What exactly is this mythic family dynamic? Sometimes he's wearing blond hair on his helmet because of reasons that they don't exactly delve into during the Silver Age? Good job being the absolute worst of your era sometimes; uh, a yikes icon? I guess I could say "well that's a lot of unpacked packing" instead of "has a lot going on" and that would probably make more sense.

On one hand, I find a character who routinely gnaws on the scenery funny — I do love camp; very Batman TV series. But on the other hand, I also tend to prefer fandoms that've been running for an extremely long time with multiple incarnations, grafted atop themselves over and over like some kinda unwieldy Mad Max structure. All the better for me to pick up/learn about shiny things as I go along, magpie-style! And when the canon is just tropes on tropes on tropes after multiple decades, it tends to change/evolve, like life! And like, I've never seen a more appropriately-shapeshifty character for this evolution. So, comics Loki has that Silver Age CURSES! vibe while at the same time has been re-envisioned with much more layered, pathos-inspiring takes. This characterization would've been more interesting in the first place, of course, but the Silver Age apparently could not even. I just like that kind of more-layered, character-evolving stuff. It neat.

#ask me anything #sorry for the long yammer #tldr: don't throw the whole camp away #when everything evolves into AU... I love to see it #loki #comics loki has a lot going on mkay

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atomikebonpyrearchive2 · 7 years ago

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MCU

my favorite female character: SHURI Hh holy fuck i love her so much!!!!!!!! all mcu women are good tho???? but the writers do them so dirty if they keep this shit up im gonna throw hands

my favorite male character: mmmmmmmmmmmmmmy boy bucky but also peter. i grew up with a lot of spider-man stuff and when hes written correctly hes approximately My Fave of All Time

my favorite book/season/etc: i dont watch the tv series kdjhgdsfg but the best movies r pretty unexpectedly ragnarok black panther and catws

my favorite episode (if its a tv show): yeah

my favorite cast member: i dont rly keep up with the cast?? thats not my thing in any fandom but uhh. i used to be mutuals with a bunch of seb stans so guess ill go with him

my favorite ship: i would take a bullet for stucky or natsharon anyday. recently shuri/michelle too

a character I’d die defending: mmmmmmmmmmmy boy bucky

a character I just can’t sympathize with: fuckin. musty ass tony stark. its always anti stark hour on this blog sowwy

a character I grew to love: probably thor. i didnt rly know anything abt him when i started watching the movies and didnt care abt him either

my anti otp: stony.... yikes........

#these r super vague sorry im tired!!!!!!!!!!#also i like p much all mcu characters so this is kind of a mess #itd b a different story w the comics tho #p #nerdystace

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belliesandburps · 4 years ago

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Followup with MGS4 Peace Walker and 5?

History has a funny way of repeating itself. :P

This one's actually gonna be long, so I'll cap it here to spare those uninterested in non-kink posts the burden of having to scroll past this fanboy rant. 'XD

Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots

3. It's Okay

Soooooo...not a controversial opinion to say that I don't think MGS4 is GREAT. I adored it when it first game out, and I still enjoy replaying it from time to time. But good lord, so many of the interviews shed light on a LOT of this games problems.

Some backstory is required. Hideo Kojima was done with MGS by this point. He planned to move on and leave the series to the younger generation. But then, there was a lot of internal conflict and struggle to determine what MGS4 should be after Fukushima quit (AND was rumored to have been murdered by the Yakuza...how that rumor started...and became a SERIOUS rumor that millions believe, I do not know...). So Kojima came back, course corrected, and the end result was kind of a giant mess.

I'm not talking story because, there's just way too much to unpack. But as a game, MGS4 can't decide what sort of video game it wants to be. It had a brilliant idea that had never been done before with its Battlefield Stealth, which were the best parts of the game. And then they get dropped two acts in, and what gets replaced in their stead is not nearly as fun.

The game had substantially less boss fights than its predecessor, and a lot of them were mechanically simplistic or just didn't let you get creative with how you fought them. And we later learned there were a lot more bosses planned, more gameplay sequences planned, and an entire other PMC group that got canned in favor of the Scarabs so Shadow Moses could be guarded by machines instead.

There's a lot about MGS4 that I love. I think the first two acts are amazing, ESPECIALLY Act 2. I think the mechanics are great. REX vs RAY is criminally fun. The sheer buffet of insane weapons gives the game a good amount of replay value. And the graphics still hold up to this day!

But what I finally realized is that the game juggles way too many ideas and doesn't give any idea the time they deserve to flourish. Battlefield Stealth could've CARRIED MGS4. But it gets dumped before we can get our moneys worth. A disguise sequence could've been really creative, having to juggle different identities with OctoMask every time one identity is burned. But it's only used once and wasted because it's only used for a terrible tailing mission that doesn't let you actually explore the European City. And too many of the action set pieces are kind of bland except the bosses and piloting Metal Gear.

MGS4 should've been MGS4. Not MGS's "Best Hits."

Metal Gear Solid: Peace Walker

1. LOVED it!

I know this is unpopular to say, but I'll say it. Peace Walker is one of the best Metal Gear games ever made. I adored almost everything about it. The gameplay improves on MGS4 in most ways because it doesn't juggle a billion ideas all at once. It's MGS4 stripped down to stealth action from start to finish, and that's all I wanted. The level design is great. The insane volume of guns changes the entire feel of combat in later post-campaign gameplay. The mission select options mean you can jump into all the parts of the game you enjoy the most. There's TONS of bonus missions that are really inventive and fun to replay. And the story is one of the best in the series. It's straight forward, very tight, characterized well, and is the best iteration of Big Boss to date.

Peace Walker's also the FUNNIEST MGS game by Kojima as well. There's so much more personality and levity to everything, to the point where Big Boss often feels like an MCU character. That might sound bad, but it's really not. That corniness fits MGS PERFECTLY, and I'd argue is tonally spot on for this series. MGS doesn't need to be dark, gory or explicit. It's a silly series that's about giant robots, corny bad ass super agents with an anti-nuke message.

The only downsides to Peace Walker are the QTE's and the boss fights. This was a feature that only ever appeared in this game and for good reason...it was fucking terrible. So basically, you had cutscenes that forced you to do various QTE's or else get dinged on your ratings at the end, even if you played perfectly. Fairly minimal, but then, you get to Strangelove's torture. And this is the single most rage-inducing part of any MGS game ever made. It's an insanely physically painful button mashing sequence that will leave your fingers raw and your PS3 triangle buttons jamming. And the ONLY way you can replay one of the best missions in the game (the prison escape where you have no items) is by redoing that sequence over and over. And the boss fights? While inventive, they're all just grindy bullet sponges with no personality, no stealth tactics, and no room for creativity the way you can get creative with every other MGS game's bosses. This was the biggest disappointment for me because the stealth and combat mechanics of PW are great and would've been SO good against human enemies like what Portable Ops had. Instead, every boss is a mini-Metal Gear all voiced by the VOCALOID AI from the mid 2000's, and each one takes forever to destroy. It sucks because PW had a TON of bosses, but only a few of them are any fun, and that's only if you have weapons that are strong enough that they don't take ages to destroy.

But asides from the bosses, the REST of the game is so damn good that I don't even care because that's just one element to a much larger, grander game. Which is even more impressive when you consider PW was originally on the PSP before the PS3 port. And this game has more content and replay value to it than most games I've played since.

Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain

1. LOVED it!

Hooooooookay...so, I've rambled about my storybook romance with MGSV for YEARS now. (Just ask @twistedtummies2, he's been subjected to my fanboying of this game more than anyone in existence XD) But there's a reason I regard this game as one of my all time favorites and the best MGS game to date.

It's REALLY freakin' fun.

Kojima had been re-energized by the time he got to MGSV. He'd been working on the game around the time he finished Peace Walker in 2010. He KNEW it was his final MGS game and wanted to do something completely different...

...He wanted to make a game where the central focus was on...waaaaait for it...the gameplay...

MGSV was designed to be, what he described, as a toybox. You have these missions that all take place in structurally unique outposts like any level in MGS. And the missions are designed with the structure needed so that they all feel different, but all remain so open ended that you can play them countless different ways.

MGSV's game model is everything GTA SHOULD'VE been. It fully embraces the open world freedom and incorporates that into the missions flawlessly. And it plays in such a way that stealth and combat both feel like they were the primary point. In MGS, combat is usually a last resort. But with MGSV, you can fly into an outpost blasting away on your helicopters mini-gun, shoot up the bad guys, rescue your target, throw them back into the chopper and fly away while "The Final Countdown" blares on your choppers loud speakers.

Every method of gameplay is valid and the controls, the enemy AI responsiveness, it's all, bar none, the best I've experienced in ANY video game. Sneaking around feels tight and tense and combat makes you feel like Jack Bauer on adrenaline. (I mean, he IS the voice of Venom Snake)

And I really like the story for the most part too. Its weaknesses are really glaring. Namely, the "Fun" of MGS is completely devoid in the story (which is really odd since it's FRONT AND CENTER in-game). Venom Snake only has maybe six minutes of dialogue in the entirety of this 30+ hour long game. And the way Skull Face gets completely undercut right at the home stretch is something I have NOT stopped bitching about for almost six years, and my friends can personally attest to that.

That and the ending feels too abrupt.

We know that Kojima got fired by Konami's VP and said VP scorched the entire production company after that and made a series of dickheaded decisions that pissed off a LOT of fans, burning much of the good will Konami IP fans had towards the company. But that had nothing to do with MGSV's abruptness. That was the plan from the start because only Kojima would think to end the entire series on a plot twist like that.

And I think the issue isn't the twist at all. In fact, I LOVE the twist. The issue is that the game should've continued beyond it so Venom Snake could cope with the truth and realize how badly he'd been screwed. I think even people who hated the twist could've been won over if there was a little more to the games epilogue than Episode 46.

Also, the games boss fights were a tad underwhelming. Not the fights themselves, I LOVED all five of the games bosses.

Oh? There were twelve?

No. I meant what I said. Because so many of the games bosses are rematches against the same bosses. All MGSV has is the Skulls, Quiet, Eli, The Man on Fire, and Metal Gear. They're great bosses that do everything the best MGS bosses always did; give you tons of options, incorporate combat AND stealth, have varied attacks AND even have multiple methods to sneak around the boss and avoid the fight completely. But for a game as long as MGS, you need more variety. And frankly, the bosses NEED more personality. Skull Face should've had more XOF assassins acting as the bosses in the game along with the ones we have. Elite assassins like Quiet, with their own powers and specialized weaponry so the fights feel completely different from the ones we have. And oh yeah, SKULL FACE HIMSELF SHOULD'VE HAD A GOD-FUCKING-DAMN BOSS FIGHT!!!!

Buuuuuuut those issues don't even matter if for all the games issues, I still replay it frequently when it's almost six years old.

So yeah! There's the massive rant you totally didn't ask for! :D

#ask belliesandburps #mgs4 #mgsv #peace walker #metal gear #metal gear solid #seriously #i'm very very VERY bitter about how Kojima did Skull Face dirty #here's this really great villain with a super complex backstory and motivation #whadduya wanna do with him kojima-san?#I'VE GOT IT!!!!!!#we'll do...absolutely nothing!#he'll show up in five missions out of a thirty nine mission long game #he'll talk at venom snake a few times and do some cool things #then right around the time we're supposed to fight him?#a random twelve year old will hijack metal gear through a PSYCHIC twelve year old and crush Skull Face before we can do anything cool! :D #hold your applause children! :D #................we weren't clapping kojima-san...........#also sins of the father?#heaven's divide?#donna burke is amazing #seriously she is an in-freakin'-CREDIBLE singer #sorry cynthia hall #i got love #but...#whoooooa-HHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!

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unsettledink · 4 years ago

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Back in the days of LJ, I used to try and do a post at the end of each year, looking back primarily at fandom and fic. I fell out of the habit when everything moved to tumblr, and then it seemed like I didn’t have anything to say since I wasn’t writing or really participating any.

But I always liked the idea of it, because I love to be overly reflective on stuff. And talk about my fic. Any excuse! I shuffled around some of the topics I used back then and added a few I’ve seen around that I liked. It got… long, because I TALK, so I split into two sections.

Your main fandom of the year?

Marvel (MCU) for sure. Primarily with characters from Spider-Man and Iron Man movies.

Your favorite film watched this year?

The Old Guard - I saw a couple trailers and everything about it looked like catnip. ‘It’s probably going to be so dumb, but I don’t even care,’ I thought. And then it was so good. It was so much fun and so much smarter than I expected and I loved each and every character and it just made me happy in so many ways.

Your favorite book read this year?

Red, White, and Royal Blue, Casey McQuiston - I read it twice this year actually. It’s so… cute isn’t the right world. Sweet and hopeful and soft and comforting and intense. I liked every single character which is pretty rare. I cried during the sad parts and then again at the happy ending, like straight up sobbed - both times. I already want to read it again.

Your favorite tv show watched this year?

Schitt’s Creek - I started it on a whim and because a lot of people had said it was good. The episodes were short so it wasn’t a huge time investment. The first season was a little rough, but there were enough funny moments that I hung on, and then… I kept getting fonder and fonder of these idiots as they grew. And THEN… it kept not disappointing me?

You grow to expect certain scripts, twists, jokes, especially in queer story lines. To wait for the bad thing to happen, because it always does. Instead, Schitt’s Creek kept going, ‘hey, here’s the set up for that! Guess what? We’re not doing it. Here’s the happy version instead.’ The relief of having that happen again and again - the last season I’ve watched (I’m sort of saving 6) I cried a bunch but it was always because I was happy.

Your favorite album or song to listen to this year?

1896 - I’ve been waiting for the new Steam Powered Giraffe album so eagerly for aaaaaages. Finally getting recordings of Zero’s songs! Lying Awake remains my favorite off the album, with Eat Your Heart and Bad Days on the Horizon high up there as well. I’m loving what Zero brings to the band.

Your best new fandom discovery of the year?

I don’t know if I really did discover that much? I stuck pretty closely to old fandoms and the ones I picked up in 2019. Maybe Zodiac? It was definitely inspiring, and I want to write and read more in it.

Maybe the couple discords I joined? I still really dislike discord and am not on there much, and mostly lurk when I am, but having somewhere vaguely like the comms I remember makes me feel a little less isolated. It’s the potential, that maybe if I said something I might make a friend, or someone might actually want to hear what I say.

Your biggest fandom disappointment of the year?

The Watch - I mean, I knew it was going to be a disaster with every word said during pre production. I wasn’t ever going to be happy with it. And then it came out and was even worse and uglier and … disrespectful not just of the source material but of actual people connected to Terry. I’m beyond disappointed that this is what we got, and it’s probably going to be a long time before we get anything else.

Devil All the Time was terrible, but I didn’t have especially high hopes. It still didn’t manage to meet them. Yikes.

The most missed of your old fandoms?

Maybe MASH? Someone I follow started talking about it and I was reminded all over again of the wonderful fics in that fandom. I went looking and a lot are gone (still on my computer, lol, but not online), but rereading was such a trip. A slightly depressing trip, but still.

The fandom you haven't tried yet, but want to?

Hmm. I’ve kind of not had the energy to invest in other fandoms at the moment? When The Witcher was having it’s big moment back in January, I had a feeling I might enjoy it enough to fall headfirst into the fandom, so I avoided watching it. Ikr? I don’t have the time or the energy to actively seek anything out.

Your biggest fan anticipations for the New Year?

SO EXCITED about Winter’s Orbit. I mean, the third Spider-Man movie for sure, with worry. The second Venom movie, ugh yes. I have tentative hopes for Jungle Cruise? Jumanji was stellar and I always enjoy Dwayne. I have both hope and dread for the new Suicide Squad - I did love Birds of Prey, so if it’s along those lines, yay. The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard because it should be some fun garbage, my favorite kind. I don’t know how I feel about Dune, but, uh, I’m anticipating it. It seems highly unlikely it will actually happen, but The Wheel of Time TV series.

I want to be excited about Black Widow but it’s hard. It’s not the story I’ve been wanting to see, and I’m angry about Natasha not getting a movie until she’s dead.

You know. If any of it is released for real.

The Good:

I moved to a better place. I got a better paying, better benefits, better environment job that lets me work from home. The house acquired 3-7 more cats depending on the month. I was able to get some serious problems on my car fixed. I have insurance and was able to start on some health stuff. No one I know got sick or died. I wrote a LOT.

The Bad:

Aside from the obvious? Depression hitting extra hard during the winter. Having to put two kittens to sleep. Have my car be hit three times in our parking lot. Being driven INSANE by one of the cats for months while the vets were all closed. Kidney stone. Dealing with several health problems. Stalling for months on Gotcha.

The Indifferent:

Not leaving the house often or easily. Enjoying a new fandom but not doing great at making connections (still real awkward, bud). Raising kittens and saying goodbye. Need new tires. Reading a lot of fic but not a lot of books. Having more pay but more expenses as well (wth insurance??).

2020 fic stats

Number of stories: 39

Number of fandoms: 6? Or 2, if you cluster the others under mcu

Total number of words: 152049

Average word count per story: 4kish

Longest fic: Causality (18k, P/Q)

Shortest fic: Can’t, Won’t (1k, P/Q)

Most comments received: Sieche (49, T/P)

Fandom you wrote the most of: MCU Spider-Man - I only wrote TWO fics that didn’t feature that fandom, wow. And one of those was still MCU.

Fandom you wrote the least of: Zodiac (1!)

Events you participated in: Marvel Trumps Hate, Kinktober, IornspidersGeorg Exchange, Starker Festivals Exchange, MCU Secret Santa, Spiderio Big Bang

Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you'd predicted?

SO MUCH MORE OMG. I mean, even just counting posted stuff! (I probably wrote a solid 300k of Gotcha this year.) I did not expect or plan on doing Kinktober, so that’s a whole 31 fics right there. I also wasn’t planning on doing any exchanges - I have a History - but then I did three? And beyond that, I did not expect for everything to get so LONG.

Topic you wrote that you would never have predicted in January:

Tony/Quentin. Goddammit @the-me09 They were like hey, they could be interesting! And while I agreed, I had no ideas for them. THEN they had to go and write Just Bodies That Collide and next thing I know, I’ve got ten fics featuring them and two-six series focused on them or Peter/Quentin/Tony. What the fuck.

Leitmotif of the year:

Vulnerability, I think. I had a bunch of things typed up and they all circle back to vulnerability in the end; sex, being seen, being wanted, sharing trauma, asking for help, trying something new. Offering a soft spot in the hopes it won’t be hurt.

Favorite character to write about:

Tony Stark, for sure. There are just a bunch of slightly different takes, and a lot of canon to work with (kind of frustrating too though). And I’m a sucker for emotionally damaged snarky traumatized characters that are viewed poorly both in universe and out.

Favorite kind of fic to write:

This year? Fluff and smut combined. Maybe that’s not the right term really. I keep looking for and writing, even in the angstiest fics, for those soft moments. Sure, maybe it’s a super smutty kink scene, but I want the affection to be obvious. Maybe everyone is consumed by guilt, but I want it to be based in caring too much. Maybe there’s no real love, just sex and even that’s messed up, but I want to find that tiny bit of fondness.

And I want happy endings. Or endings that look like they’re going to be happy, at least, even if there’s all the angst first. I don’t think I’ve killed anyone this year? Who AM I?

Biggest disappointment:

Not finishing the rough draft of Gotcha. I was making such good progress in 2019, from August to December. Even after the move, I basically finished part 6 in January. I fumbled around and fussed with 1 a lot, but that had already been given one draft, really, and I got through half of 4 before I slowed to a stop. I’ve barely gotten anything accomplished on it since June. Bits and pieces here and there, but nothing significant, not like I was doing. I can excuse October, due to 80k invested in Kinktober (yikes!), but aside from that… I’m sad. I’ll finish it eventually, but I really thought I could have the first draft done in a year. I’m sitting at about 480k out of what I’m almost certain will be 700k.

Biggest surprise:

Kinktober! It was kind of spur of the moment, decided just a week in advance. I’ve tried month long or even like, 20-25 day long challenges and I don’t think I’ve ever completed one. I thought there was a good chance I’d do so again, so I gave myself a little help and made my own list of prompts, things I knew I liked and hadn’t done much of yet. And it worked? I actually completed it, what the hell? Despite spending five days travelling near the end! Despite falling behind in getting ahead and writing a bunch of stories the day they were to be posted! Despite apparently forgetting how to do short form!

I, uh, could have done without the spawning of eleven series or sequels or continuations jfc WHY SELF.

Something you learned this year:

Ideas breed ideas. I swear to god, the second I sit down to think through a current idea, I wake up the next morning with three more.

Words need to be restocked. I need to consume new - not rereads, not fic - content every so often to refresh my word bank. It is astonishing how quickly writing goes again after I’ve done so.

I can write so much more than I thought I could. I can do so much more than I thought I could. Yes, I can complete challenges without dropping out early. Yes, I can do exchanges and not regret it. Yes, I can write more than 100k, more than 200k, more and more - and I can write 10k+ easily too. Though I wouldn’t mind if I could once again write less than 10k without feeling like I’ve cut off in the middle.

My time is shrinking, and if I want to write as much, I’m going to have to make the time. I can’t rely on three days off a week, on seven hours of uninterrupted overnight shifts, on hyper focused writing binges that leave everything else around me on fire.

Most memorable comment:

So, so many! I can’t pick one. I’ve been really lucky to get a bunch of really detailed, enthusiastic, analyzing comments across all different fics. One of the types that always sticks with me are the ones like ‘I didn’t think/know I liked this ship/kink/twist, but fuck, apparently I do? You made me, what the hell?’.

What, if anything, are you going to try to do differently in your writing in the new year?

So with writing Gotcha but not posting until it’s done, my view of what I’ve written vs anyone else’s is extremely skewed. I’m sitting here thinking, hey I’m 400k in and got another 10k done today, so much writing! While anyone looking at my AO3 account (for most of the year) is like, you’re averaging three months between fics :(

All that to say I want to try and get something posted more frequently while I’m working on Gotcha.

Also, writing for kinktober was really interesting - pushing myself to write every single day, often for that day’s post, forced me to get back into shorter form fic. Which used to be all I did? But it was surprisingly hard to just stop and not write more. So I’d like to challenge myself to write more fics under 10k at least. Maybe even under 5k though that might be asking a lot lol. I might get there with the many continuations of those fics I’d like to do. Does that count?

Goals:

I want to hit 365 fics. :) I’m only 32 away!

Aside from writing -

I’ve really enjoyed the reading record sideblog I started this year. I’ve let it lapse a little the past month or so, but I’d like to keep it going strong.

I’d like to leave a lot more comments. I want to get better about allowing imperfection - I want to write The Best Comment, but in the end? Probably 90% of fic writers are going to be happier with a comment expressing enjoyment in any way over no comment at all.

And not just on fics, but on general posts as well. It’s hard not to feel… weird and stupid and invasive and rude leaving any sort of comment on someone’s post if I don’t know them at least a little. I have godawful rejection sensitive dysphoria and a lot of interactions that ended poorly; I’m really not good at people. But as dumb as it feels to say those things, I know I am thrilled and warmed and happier when there’s a reblog with tags or a note or a comment or an ask or just, any small interaction that shows someone out there notices and cares, at least a little. There’s no reason I can’t at least try to offer that to other people.

I’d like to make/run a couple challenges of my own, later in the year. I’m still figuring out what I want to do and what I could do. I’m really interested in doing something that’s not focused on creators, but the readers; some sort of comment or rec challenge maybe.

I want to find a cheerleader for Gotcha. I’m struggling to keep up my motivation to write it when it’s already in my head, where I can ��read’ it any time. There’s a line between depending too much on external validation and trying to generate all your validation yourself, and I’m getting to a point where I think I need to ask for help (gasp! The hardest thing EVER).

(Part Two: Pick Some Fics)

#end of year #unsettled rambles

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spockandawe · 5 years ago

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A, J, and O?

Indeed!!

A - Ships that you currently like a lot. (They don’t have to be OTPs because not everyone has OTPs.) Friendships, pairings, threesomes, etc. are allowed.

Oh lord, this is going to be harder than usual. Usually I hyperfocus on one fandom to the exclusion of most others, but I’ve been reading lately, plus a little transformers-adrift (i’m planning to reread soon and dig back in), but... let’s see.

Transformers: Starbladejack, always and forever. Vigilem/Caminus and Metrotitan/Chela, because I’ve been thinking wistfully about how much I adore Titans lately. Cygate, cywhirlgate, dratchet, megarod, cdrw(with optional prowl). Megatron/Ultra Magnus, Grimlock/Misfire. Blast Off/Cosmos, Blast Off/Swindle, Cosmos/Soundwave. I’ve been pining for Pharma/peace of mind, which I’m not sure he’ll find on his own, but I have VERY few people who would make a reasonable happy ship for him XD Wait wait, MEGATRON/PHARMA, how could I forget that one, there we go.

Other: Breq/Seivarden, Geralt/Jaskier/Yennefer, Simon/Baz, Grisaille/Ruthven, Alex/Henry, JON/MARTIN, Jon/Martin/Gerard. Murderbot/friendship. River/Moon, EVERYONE/Moon (literally. i have a fic idea), Gideon/Harrow. I’m trying to remember what books I’ve even read lately and am hella blanking for some reason. But I’m real easy, when it comes to ships. I’m an absolute sucker.

J - Name a fandom you didn’t think about until you saw it all over Tumblr. (You don’t have to care about it or follow it; it just has to be something that Tumblr made you aware of.)

Oh lord, Homestuck is the main culprit for sure. I was there minding my own business in ATLA, and I finally decided to see what this “home stuck” thing was all about, and came to myself again several years later. No ragrets, for sure, but that was the biggest t-boning of my life. The Magnus Archives is a more recent iteration. I never would have known anything about live action tv fandoms like dr who or merlin without tumblr, but I also never got involved with those. I was fairly uninvolved with the mcu before seeing people post about it on here, and now I’m... occasionally involved. Oh, The Witcher, that’s another one. I don’t keep up with much media on my own, so I kind of rely on tumblr to know anything that’s happening ever in the world of fiction :P

O - Choose a song at random. Which ship or character does it remind you of?

THIS is usually a hazardous time sink for me to invest myself in. But right now, I have a good song at hand. Emilie Autumn: One Foot in Front of the Other

youtube

And who this is?

How did I get myself into all of this mess?How did I end up with this deadly home address?How did I come to this, where every song I singIs nothing but a list of pain and suffering?

Well.

I used to have a home, now I don’t even have a nameI’m nothing but a number, here we are all the sameWe’ve lost so much, so many of those we love are deadHow do I get these memories out of my fucking head?

This is the magnus archives, babey. Parts of this song are very Jon and parts are very Martin, and some of them are tasty hints of other characters, but those are the two are the easiest matches. Especially, ESPECIALLY given that chorus. It feels so very appropriate for them. It’s a song I can match up to lots of my faves, but it’s hard to think about anyone but Jon and Martin just now

#spock replies #ask memes #long post/#Anonymous

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ayankun · 5 years ago

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real quick before I get into season 6

So this is my second time watching Season 6 and I’m p. excited. This last week or so I’ve been dredging up bits and pieces, but most of it is a blur. It seems the memories that lasted this whole year were mostly of the huge armored truck and the nonbinary character who works at *spoilers*’s tech startup.

I’m curious to see if the second time through it’ll settle in like it belongs. I remember Season 5 really didn’t make any sense to me until I saw it again.

But really I’m just excited that in 11 hours I can watch the new stuff?!

But first, before I forget, here’s my last thoughts on Season 5.

So remember how I was surprised at Season 1′s structure, that it folded up nicely down the middle with some pretty tidy symmetry?

None of the other seasons do that.

Instead, I remember particularly strongly how jarring the end of the Ghost Rider arc was in the middle of Season 4. And then again when the (what I’m calling) Kasius arc also wrapped up mid-season.

I’m not sure when I read about it, but it probably was circa Ghost Rider, that they’d intentionally decided on what I’m pretty sure they called “pods” of episodes, these seasons-within-a-season sort of narratives.

Season 2 sort of kicks it off, what with the race to Terragenesis taking eps 1-10 and the Afterlife/splinter SHIELD stories filling 11-22. Then Season 3 has the monolith/Maveth mystery to start, followed by Hive & the Inhumans for the second half. S4 is super poddy, obviously branded as Ghost Rider/Agents of Hydra, and S5 also splits neatly into future!Lighthouse and present day!Lighthouse.

Two points to make on this:

Kasius is such a rockstar villain that I feel really bad for Hale/Ruby/Talbot. They’re so apples and oranges but having the highlight come first allows for unfavorable comparisons to be made. It’s like asking any well-to-do Kree to compare Xandarian snail to oops all berries.

Good thing they’d had all this practice writing complete stories in 12 eps, since I’m hoping Season 6 (and obvs Season 7) will still feel as fully formed as their longer antecedents.

Anyway, that first point is my major point for S5.

S3 already feels like the second half of S2, and its internal halves are the most similar to each other as any of the other “pods,” so it’s not like people have a reason to go around saying “I liked the first half of the season waaay better than the second.”

(although I might. I might say that, actually. but not because the halves were branded separately from one another)

And S4, though the two halves are barely identifiable as coming from the same show much less the same season, they’re both good. Robbie Reyes is perfect. The effort to incorporate new MCU topics/aesthetic from Doctor Strange is great. Robots who just want to be a real girl is my JAM. All the Framework cameos really make my day! And then Robbie Reyes comes back all deus ex machina (ironic) and saves the day, and

it makes sense that he does because the function and nature of the Darkhold was well established in part 1 and

it’s GREAT that he does because he’s perfect and we miss him.

Then here comes S5. I really really respect so much about the creative decisions that took the story where it went (ie, outside Papa MCU’s sphere of interference), and getting to reuse the same set in a different context while minimizing “on-location” shoots is just technical and financial genius, okay.

But there’s so much about the first half, in the future, that compels me waaaaaaay more than the gritty anger of the second half.

Kasius, WOW what a villain. Dominic Rains, everyone. I have nothing unkind to say about the performance, the character, anything. Impeccable. Spectacular. Perfection.

The mystery of the season opener! We had the tag scene where Coulson’s “in space” and plenty of time to ruminate on the how and why, especially with Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2 coming out right as S4 ended and Thor: Ragnarok literally sizzling in the theaters at the same time as this season started. They answer the question by the end of the episode, but not before several characters come up with and pursue several different theories, and that’s fun.

What a way to capitalize on the Inhuman storyline your show’s been about for years now, without forcing Papa MCU to contend with all this good work you’ve been doing. Just go somewhere he can’t reach you (the future), and then un-write all of it anyway. V. tidy. Extra style points will be awarded.

LEITMOTIFS. If y’all’ve seen BSG, then you know Bear McCreary is a master of the art. But this season has so many good themes, my friends. The Daisy/Quake theme that’s been knocking around for a season is here in full force, and Sinara’s is the best bad guy theme you could have wanted, and dearest sweetest Flint has the best great guy theme you ever heard.

Just, while we’re here. Sinara. She says nothing for episodes (it feels like, I wasn’t counting) and her first line is a scornfully growled “compassion.” Give it up for Florence Faivre !!! She hardly has any lines but you always know exactly what she’s thinking and what she’s about. Sinara and Kasius have the richest on-screen chemistry of anybody on any show from any era fight me on this I dare you.

Mack’s coming down from his second life in the Framework, and that suuuuucks that these folks never have a moment to rest before barreling into their next story. But he gets to be a father to Flint! And Yo-Yo gets to be a mother!!! UGH why couldn’t they have brought Flint instead of Deke lololol oh well.

I think I know another reason why Lincoln seems overhyped to me. That other Inhuman, Ben I think his name is? He’s in like two episodes, serves a narrative purpose, and is disposed. I know Lincoln’s in like 18 times as many episodes but they have the same exact overall impact on my brain-hole. Imagine if it was Ben that came back with them instead of Deke. That’s how I feel about Lincoln. Like, how did this obviously disposable character make it this far?

Then you have Deke. You love to hate him. He’s a very well-fashioned character who is flawless in making you feel the way the showrunners want you to feel. That’s the kind of character that gets killed off twice and still comes back, and it doesn’t surprise you.

So, Enoch. Enoch is everyone’s favorite character, right? Right. Give me genderless robots with a soft spot for humanity ANY DAY. PLEASE where are they I need them. (I’m un-repressing memories of S6 and I feel like somehow I should be careful what I wish for) Man I remember with 1000% clarity the absolute glee I felt sitting down for the opening montage of S5 the first time, how ballsy weird it was, just watching this freaky bald alien of a man go swimming with some fun electro pop number playing in the background. 100/10 please make more television like this

More monoliths!! The time one is so pretty!

(remember when there were more monoliths and no one knew where they came from or what they did but then it didn’t matter because they got instantly exploded?)

The low-key obvious answers to the season’s questions, what with the Inhumans running all over the shop, Quake there to tear everything down and Flint there to put the pieces back together I’m not crying you’re crying

Oh man, and Simmons getting to mentor not one but two Inhuman youths to be confident and trust in themselves and their powers. What a ways from the fear-panic response to Daisy when she turned.

Also, yeah, it has to be said, this show’s blatant “you’re different and that’s okay” agenda sits very well with me. Agents of SHIELD says LGBTQ+ rights!

So anyway, part 2 falls a little flat for me because its strength is its themes, but I’m not really compelled by the stakes and definitely not by the villains and not really even by the intra-team drama.

Obviously S2 touched on parenthood, but it was pretty specific. S5 digs in and brings us a lot more on the topic.

Kasius desperately desires his father’s approval but very deeply despises the methods and the people who earn it.

Hale was indoctrinated by Hydra and was very earnest in wanting to uphold the values of the organization, until the organization (and Whitehall) shared with her their narrow appreciation of the gift of her loyalty. Even then, she struggles to make sense of this loyalty, only realizing too late that being a good Hydra pawn and a good parent are categorically mutually exclusive.

Ruby, obviously, is like a mini-Kasius, the brave-faced rebel who wears her mother’s disappointment on her sleeve like a badge of honor to pretend that it isn’t crippling her.

The Von Strucker kid, boy is he messed up (and his Hydra dad had something to do with it)

((echos of Ward are still heard even this far after his demise, and we know what his father figures were like))

Poor Talbot, got some brain damage and some Hydra conditioning on top of that, cracked that noggin wide open. He just wanted to do good by his family. Just wanted his son to know he loves him.

Polly and Robin. The daughter who needs constant special care because she’s stuck inside her own mind and the mother who’s been through hell and back and still manages to do her best. Even when she knows she won’t always be there for her daughter. Even when she knows she’ll be replaced.

May getting a glimpse at the life she and Andrew once talked about. Getting a chance to do right by that little girl.

Mack recovering from getting that same glimpse, from the echoing memories of a life time spent with his greatest regret erased. Being roped into being a thug and threatening that dad without knowing the meaning behind his threat -- being told that people like him don’t deserve the privilege of parenthood. But then getting to know Flint, and having Yo-Yo at his side while they fast track this kid through all the things he’s gonna need to know in order to be the Big Damn Hero the world needs him to be.

The timey-wimey promise that FitzSimmons will one day be parents to a brilliant daughter who will unfortunately give birth to a Deke.

Coulson and Daisy. Another parent placing enormous expectations on his daughter, desperate that she be ready for his responsibilities because his time is running out. A daughter who mishandles these expectations and refuses to stop fighting a losing battle, not because she’s not ready to step up, but because she doesn’t want to face the fact that she’s losing the man who raised her.

Anyway, aside from all this good Theme work, part 2 wades perfunctorily through musty remnants of the previous season, from The Doctor to The Russian. Which makes sense, because that season ended in a way that left so many loose threads -- but then this season comes along and summarily ties them up, all cute little bows, the lot of them. Dusts its hands. Nothing to see here. Move along now. Time’s up.

#Agents of Shield #aos

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occasionalfics · 6 years ago

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worth my while // p. 7

main masterlist | thor masterlist | ko-fi | p. 6 | p. 8

Summary: After being banished from his home, Thor Odinson has stopped at nothing to prove himself worthy of his throne, title, and power.

After losing the love of your life, you turned to a power you didn’t understand.You know you shouldn’t get involved.

But how could you not?

Pairing: Thor x Reader (Hercules au…kind of…)

A/N: Oh, you know, just more not very subtle references to Hercules here ;)

Also there’s a reference to Parker Robbins, who’s not in the MCU but he’s a Marvel comic villain. I basically just chose him because he fits in with the other, more recognizable Marvel villains Hades wants to work with but, ultimately, he’s not on screen. I just also knew he was kind of an obscure choice for a Thor fanfic XD

Warnings: Violence, lots of angst, borderline abuse and definite manipulation, eventual smut, way too many feels, major character death (eventually). Hades is still a huge creep.

Words: 3,126

Hades is putting a board together. He has a square in the center of the board, four names spread out - one at each corner - and a mess of a diagram throughout the center of the square. It only worries you marginally that the names are: Von Doom, Fisk, Osborn, and Robbins.

You’d asked him who the last one was.

“Some...I don’t know, some mob boss’er something,” he’d said.

You still can’t figure out what he needs these men for. All four are rich, white, and have a stake in the destruction of the Avengers. But the closer you look at the diagram, the less it looks like Hades actually wants to destroy them. He hasn’t written down his actual plan, but it doesn’t seem to involve allowing the souls of the heroes into his domain.

Each of the men on the board have two or three names of Avengers around them. You already know Hades wants to split them up, but the order doesn’t make sense.

Remarkably, Thor is missing from the board entirely. Something inside of you is relieved, but something more suspicious is suddenly on edge.

Hades won’t let you meet these men. Won’t even send you to give Von Doom messages or updates or anything anymore. Apparently, the failure of the first meeting has left its mark. You’re not of much use to him, but you know he won’t just let you go.

Actually, as you look closer, you realize that you’re not even on the board at all. Neither is Hades.

If the three of you are missing, you can only imagine what Hades has planned. Nothing good comes to mind. Your stomach sinks at all of the possibilities.

You hear the flat heels of his dress shoes as they patter against his marble floors. Hades comes into the room as you step away from the board, pulling out your phone to attempt to make it look like you weren’t studying his plan.

He’s ancient. He’s smart. He knows better.

“You worry too much, you know that?” he asks you, stepping around you to push the board against the window of the den.

“Just trying to figure out what you’re gonna do if you were willing to throw me off a building,” you shoot back.

At that, he rolls his eyes. “Get over it already, would you?” he asks, turning around to take a seat on the couch. All three Cerberuses fall into the room, one at a time. Your favorite one - which you can only distinguish because of his behavior - immediately sits at your heels. One sits with Hades, and the third lays on the floor between the two of you.

“‘S not like you can die while you’re under my jurisdiction.”

You stare at him. That’s a detail he hasn’t given you before. Not even when you were negotiating the terms of bringing Rick back to life.

Gods you were naive then, to think that Hades had your best interest at heart. To think someone so cunning, so world-weary would care about one petty mortal life.

You’re not sure what that means for Thor. He’s different, but he’s still a God, still on a level of existence closer to Hades than you.

When you don’t have anything else to verbally throw back at him, Hades smirks. He tips his head back pompously and asks, “How’s the God of Thunder doing?”

At that, you cock an eyebrow at him. “Why do you wanna know?”

Your Cerberus whines beside you, turning his face up toward you with an inky sadness deep in his eyes. It’s like he can see inside of you and reflects your true emotions back at you. And given how little Hades has told you about his world, you might not doubt it.

“Am I not allowed to have vested interest in my servants’ love life?” he asks, feigning absolute innocence.

You cross your arms. “No,” is all you say. You don’t feel the need to justify your relationship with Thor (your head tells you it’s not a relationship), even though some part of you is screaming to tell Hades that you don’t love Thor, and that, by omission of that declaration alone, he will assume that you do.

Do you?

You can’t, that’s for sure.

You do... adore him, though.

But you stop your thoughts there, because going any further here, in Hades’ home, is dangerous for both you and Thor and who even knows who else.

“You are absolutely no fun, you know that?” he asks as his face falls into unamused boredom.

“You’re the king of the dead,” you spit back. “You should be used to it.”

At that, he laughs. He really must think you’re being comical, or else he just wants to believe you are. Either way, he laughs, then straightens up and pats the spot on the couch next to him.

You sigh. As much as you want to ignore Hades, you know you can’t. He owns you.

Every time you think about that, you hate yourself a little more.

Cerberus follows you to the couch, curling under your arm as you sit on the seat beside Hades. The third one comes over and turns in a circle between your right heel and Hades’ left before making himself truly comfortable on the floor.

“I know you’ve been spending a lot of time with the Asgardian,” Hades says. He pets his Cerberus slowly, and you find yourself doing the same to yours. You know they’re irresistible; that’s why he has them in the first place, you think. “You don’t spend time with anyone, and yet, you keep going back to him.”

“He’s the first person to treat me like a decent human in years, so,” you say, shrugging and looking at your Cerberus, because even this feels like being over-the-top vulnerable with Hades.

“So you must know a lot about him, then,” he says. “Intimate details. Things he might not even tell his teammates.”

“I doubt that,” you mutter. And you do - doubt that Thor has told you anything he hasn’t shared with his friends already. The Avengers have to trust one another to work as a cohesive unit - the fiasco over the Accords proved that much already. Hades’ plan is never going to work because of it. You’re absolutely sure of that.

But Hades chuckles anyway. “C’mon, (Y/N),” he calls. “You gotta know something! Something good, something useful!”

You think about what Thor told you out on that balcony. Heat creeps into your face, despite your best efforts to tame it, because you just remember being so close to him, physically and emotionally, and you know you’ve gotten yourself into more trouble than you bargained for already. But maybe you can cover your tracks, maybe you can lessen the inevitable blow you know is coming just by virtue of sitting next to Hades, having this very conversation, by just giving him...a little peek. Nothing big. Not the whole story that Thor’s trusted you with.

You sigh, at least to make it seem like you’re giving into the temptation to gossip. “He was banished here because he mucked up some...political conflict back home. He didn’t just show up, like all the news outlets want us to believe.”

Hades absolutely eats it up. He sits forward, eyebrow cocked, smile positively gleaming. His navy eyes burn with intensity that scares you.

“So he does have weaknesses,” he mutters. “They’re just not like the others’.”

“I mean, dude’s pretty close to perfect,” you start. And then you find that you can’t really stop. “I don’t...think he was when he got here, but now he’s really...wonderful.” You bite your lip, but really, it’s just coming out of you now. You haven’t shared your inner feelings like this in so long that it’s forcing its way out almost violently. “He cares, so much. And, sure, he wants to prove himself worthy of going home, but he really loves it here, too. He loves the people. He’s stayed with the team this long for them.”

You’re somehow able to keep this to yourself, but you think that, even if it hadn’t you that fell from that building, Thor still would’ve stopped his fight to save whoever it was. He didn’t know that your presence was more than just a coincidence.

Hades is shaking his head, a mad look in his eyes. He stands up to tower over you, and you’re suddenly frozen to your spot.

You’ve said too much. You can feel it in your gut.

“I know how to get him,” he mutters. It’s the first breath of a sign to you about this whole plan, which immediately shakes you.

Hades hasn’t told you anything that you’re not directly involved in. But this…

You shake your head. “I won’t help you hurt him,” you say, forcing your face into a scowl despite the trembling of your hands and knees. Your Cerberus cries beside you.

But Hades doesn’t care. He comes closer to you, reaches out and dares to cup your cheek. You can’t move to do anything about it. Your whole body feels cold - you’ve felt this before, and you know it’s because Hades is using magic on you. No matter how much you struggle, you can’t control your body anymore.

“The funny thing about our little arrangement, babe,” he says, stroking your jaw with his thumb, “is that I own your soul. You’ll do whatever I tell you to do. You signed on the dotted line.”

You glare at him, eyes closing into little squints because they’re the only things you can move.

“But I know you, (Y/N). I know you well enough that, if you truly believe something isn’t right, you’ll fight it.” He chuckles. “I’ve always liked that about you, believe it or not. But right now, it’ll only get in my way. So.” He lets go of your face, but not the control over your body. “How about I make you a deal you can’t refuse?”

All you can do is wait to hear him out. Exactly as he wants.

“How about, in return for finding out just one of Thor’s concrete weaknesses - anything that’ll get him out of the way - I give you the one thing that no one else can. The one thing that I know you’ve been craving since that creep Rick left.”

You don’t have to ask to know what it is.

“You get me a weakness, and you’re free.”

Everything about this feels wrong.

You know it’s because you’ve asked Thor out with an ulterior motive. That doesn’t make knowing that it all feels wrong any different.

Maybe he’ll understand, you think. Maybe he can identify with your plight. It’s not like he doesn’t have one of his own, you know?

It’s not like he doesn’t understand what being out of control of your own destiny, even for a single moment, is like.

You’re desperate. He can understand. Maybe. One day.

For now, he’s content holding your hand, walking around the city like a pair of tourists. He looks at everything with such joy and unadulterated light that it’s easy to forget why you’re out with him. Why you’re really out with him.

After lunch, you amble around in the warm sun, God of Thunder attached to your side and you wonder, for a second, how you got so fortunate. How you are the lucky one he decides to spend his days off with.

Although, you wouldn’t say it’s so much his day off as it is an afternoon in which he’s out of the tower without means of communicating with the team, as he doesn’t have a phone that he carries with him on a regular basis. You figure they probably just have some kind of tracker on him, anyway, so if the world were truly in danger, Thor’d be easy to find.

So back to you being fortunate - because, really, it’s not fortune. At least this time, it’s by design.

And you haven’t been working toward that design much. Thor’s laughing at something you’d said, and you’ve already forgotten what it was and exactly what your aim is here.

He laughs with his whole body. He’s never ashamed to show how he feels. You wonder what his secret is.

You come down to a set of stairs that spread into a park, Thor leading you down them still laughing and filling you with warmth and guilt that he doesn’t even know exists. You know you need to get a move on. You sigh, then cover it by clearing your throat. And as you come to the last step, you intentionally fall forward, pretending to have tripped.

“Oh!” you exclaim, in just enough time for Thor to catch you from falling to the ground. When he’s got you standing, you lift one leg and say, “Sorry. Weak ankles.”

“Well then,” he says, pulling you closer to him. He has all of your weight resting in his arms, doesn’t even look away from you before he pulls you out of the way of most of the people moving around you. “Maybe we should sit for a little while.” He brings you to the bottom stair and sets you down easily, then sits beside you.

You instinctively rest on his shoulder. Everything in you calls to everything in him. It hurts to acknowledge.

You give a small laugh and ask, “So, do you...ever have to deal with something like this?” You throw one leg out in front of you and wiggle your toes. “Weak ankles?”

It seems like such a preposterous question to ask someone so immensely huge. Thor must think so, too, because he laughs and shakes his head. “No, not really.”

You hum. “No...trick knees?” In an entirely not subtle move, you put your hand on his knee and draw circles over his jeans. In a low voice, you ask “Ruptured...discs?”

Thor leans in toward you, and you meet his gaze. He’s giving you a look you’ve only seen in the privacy of his bedroom before - the openness about it here scares you a little bit, but you can’t pull away now. You’re so close, and the closer you get, the quicker this can all be over. The sooner you can start begging Thor for forgiveness.

His hand envelopes yours on his knee before he tells you, “I believe the saying Stark uses often is fit as a fiddle. Nothing out of place. Yet.” He winks, and you feel your whole body warm up, even more than the temperature around you.

The breath you let out is shaky at best. The fact that half of his hair is tied back, keeping his front bits out of his face, isn’t helping you or hurting him.

You want to kiss him, to claim him. You want the tabloids to be talking all about the Avenger and his little plaything while you and Thor know the truth - but the truth, the real truth, is not something you even want people to guessing at. The truth fucking sucks.

So you force yourself to sit back, and you let out, “Thunderboy, you are perfect.”

He must think that’s really a compliment, because he chuckles and says, “Why, thank you.” But then his eyes close, and his face angles toward his lap. “You know that’s not the truth, though. And yet, you still choose to spend your days with me.”

You hesitate to tell him that you were only just thinking the same thing.

And in your hesitance, he goes on. “That’s why I love humans. You’re all so…”

“Petty and dishonest?” you ask before you think.

His eyes open and he looks at you in that curious way - the same way he’d looked at you when you’d asked him to get coffee all those weeks ago.

“I was going to say forgiving,” he tells you. “Not everyone is like that.”

“Yes they are,” you refute, managing to wiggle out from under his grasp. You scoot along the step until you’re right up against a metal handrail.

Thor follows. “You’re not like that.”

The electric blue of his eyes has never been anything but genuine to you. Even when he stared you down in Von Doom’s office - he was still open and honest. Dangerous, for sure, but he’s not now.

Your heart breaks a little bit when you ask him, “What do you know about me?” It’s not a fair question. You know it, he knows it, you wouldn’t be surprised if the whole fucking park knows it. You’re the one who’s been keeping secrets this whole time.

“I know that you’re one of the kindest people I’ve ever met,” he says, reaching out for one of your hands. The hand that had just been on his knee. Only this time, he keeps his fingers between yours and just...holds you. “And one of the most confusing. But I like that.”

A ghost of a smile is able to break out across your sombre expression.

“I know that I like waking up next to you. And I know that, before I met you, I didn’t realize how much of Earth I was missing out on.”

One signal in your head tells you that you can’t let him go farther than that. That feelings will only get complicated and dirty the second he realizes what you’ve done.

Another signal tells you that you so desperately want this. Want Thor. That he makes you feel like you can move whole mountains just because he believes in you.

Then, there’s a third signal. Except it’s not inside of you, and really, it’s not a signal at all. It’s Tony Stark’s voice over a crowd that’s increasingly interested in whatever Tony Stark is doing.

You look out toward the fountain beyond the stairs and notice both Iron Man and War Machine headed right for the two of you. Thor sighs, tightens his grip on your hands a bit, then shakes his head.

“I’m sorry, (Y/N),” he says, and you actually deign to believe that he is. “It seems I’m being called to duty.” He stands, and a breeze pushes a small red flower past his feet. Thor picks it up, brushes its petals off softly, then turns and hands the flower over to you. “Until next time,” he says.

Then he bends and kisses your cheek. Though you’ve kissed him before, his lips send electric jolts through your body. He lights you up.

And then he stands, backs away, calls forth a hail of lightning and transforms from civilian into hero. He smiles at you gently, genuinely, before calling forth Mjölnir and joining his teammates in the sky.

#thor x reader #thor odinson x reader #thor au #hercules au #worth my while fic

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explodingcrenelation · 6 years ago

Text

Tony Stark and the Messianic Archetype in Avengers: Endgame

* * * * * S P O I L E R S ahead for Avengers: Endgame * * * * *

From a purely analytical standpoint, I don’t have anything against Tony’s character arc in Endgame culminating with his death. His last moments in the heat of battle weren’t rushed, poorly written, or unearned. If Tony Stark was going to die on screen, of course he’d do it like a goddamn badass—and he did.

At this point Marvel is telling a single story to millions upon millions of people and there’s no way they can craft a narrative to suit every single person. When I say Tony's death didn’t work for me, I do so knowing that Marvel wasn’t writing the story for me anyway. And I'm not trying to disparage the creative team's efforts and storytelling choices. They made a call. I don’t agree it was the right one.

For me, Tony’s death traps him inside a Messianic Archetype that doesn’t elevate his character in a wholly satisfying way and doesn’t fit the themes of the established, team-centric universe. In this essay I will…

…actually write a fucking 4000-word essay, so buckle up and read on if you’re in for the ride.

What Is the Messianic Archetype?

The Messianic Archetype is a messiah trope. It’s exactly what it sounds like—one person (usually (but not always) white, usually (but not always) male) who sacrifices themselves for the greater good.

Here’s how TV Tropes puts it:

In media, the Messianic Archetype is a character whose role in the story (but not necessarily personality) echoes that of Christ. They are portrayed as a savior, whether the thing they are saving is a person, a lot of people or the whole of humanity. They endure a sizable sacrifice as the means of bringing that salvation about for others, a fate they do not deserve up to and including death or a Fate Worse than Death. Other elements may be mixed and matched as required but the Messianic Archetype will include one or more of the following:

- The Chosen One. - True Companions who follow him. - Betrayal by one of those followers. - Persecution by nonbelievers. - Crucified Hero Shot (or other parallels to the Passion Play). - Figurative or literal resurrection. - A Second Coming. - The initials JC.

Some examples of Messianic Archetypes in popular narratives are: Gandalf in Lord of the Rings, Spock in Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan (or Kirk in Star Trek: Into Darkness), Harry Potter in The Deathly Hallows, Superman in Batman vs Superman, or Neo in the Matrix trilogy. The Doctor in Doctor Who is frequently and repeatedly presented as a messiah figure. Multiple incarnations of Sherlock also follow suit in multiple imaginings of the the Reichenbach Falls scenario. (I won’t go into details with any of these characters. I trust the Messianic Archetypes here are obvious to anyone familiar with these stories.)

In the Marvel Cinematic Universe itself, we see Messianic Archetypes popping up all over the place—like daisies! Steve plays this part when he sacrifices himself in The First Avenger to stop Red Skull's plan to bomb several major American cities. His time in the ice is a kind of death from which he is subsequently “resurrected” in modern day New York. To a lesser extent, he also offers himself up as a sacrifice to save Bucky in The Winter Soldier.

T’Challa follows this pattern in Black Panther when he’s betrayed by W’Kabi, defeated by Killmonger, and subsequently resurrected within the safety of M’Baku’s tribe.

In the first Thor movie, Thor is betrayed by Loki, sacrifices himself to the Destroyer to protect his human friends, and he comes back from near-death with the return of Mjölnir, having proven himself worthy of the hammer.

Carol Danvers destroys Mar-Vell’s engine in Captain Marvel to keep enemies from getting their hands on tech that could harm millions of innocent people. Her human life symbolically ends in the subsequent explosion, and she’s effectively reborn with superpowers.

Pepper Potts is betrayed by her former colleague Killian in Iron Man 3, selected as his “chosen one” for the Extremis injection, and she dies and is reborn from fire.

Yondu in Guardians of the Galaxy Volume 2—

Well, I could go on for a long time, but... you get the idea.

The Messianic Archetype isn’t particularly new to popular media, let alone the MCU.

This trope is deeply, almost subconsciously, woven into the fabric of popular western storytelling. There's nothing inherently wrong with that. Tropes are tropes for a reason—they speak to us on a cultural and instinctual level. We want to hear these stories over and over, replay them in new ways and look at them from different angles precisely because there is something meaningful in the narrative.

And Tony Stark's narrative is no exception. His repeated acts of self-sacrifice fit into the Messianic Archetype very, very well.

Proof That Tony Stark Has a Heart

The MCU kicked off in 2008 with the first Iron Man movie and Tony Stark has ostensibly been the main character of the franchise from the beginning.

The Iron Man movies establish early on that Tony has a savior complex to match the size of his ego. Our genius playboy billionaire philanthropist is a deeply flawed hero who started out his career as a maker of WMDs. He was widely known as “The Merchant of Death” before he saw the error of his ways. Tony understands he has done many Bad Things and he must atone for those Bad Things—with his life, if necessary.

“I shouldn’t be alive, unless it was for a reason. ... I finally know what I have to do and I know in my heart that it’s right.” —Tony Stark, Iron Man

The first Iron Man movie climaxes with Tony ordering Pepper to blow the Arc Reactor to stop Stane’s rampage, even though Tony might perish in the process. In Iron Man 2, Tony is actively dying from palladium poisoning, but he faces down Vanko (sans Iron Man suit) on the speedway of the Monaco Historic Grand Prix. In the first Avengers movie, we see Tony put his life on the line to get a nuclear weapon out of New York.

This is a repeated pattern for Tony, and like an addict, it’s one he struggles to break. Over and over Tony flings himself into the fray, believing he’s the one who makes the difference—he’s the willing sacrifice whose blood saves the world.

Tony selects himself to be “the chosen one” because he sees himself as the one at fault for bringing evil into the world.

“We create our own demons. Who said that? What does that even mean? Doesn’t matter, I said it cause he said it. ...So why am I telling you this? Because I had just created demons, and I didn’t even know it.” —Tony Stark, Iron Man 3

Iron Man 3 shows us just how deeply responsible Tony feels for the wrongs of the world. Because he made naive (and selfish) mistakes when he was young, Tony blames himself for creating villains that plague the earth now.

We see this best in the aftermath of the destruction of Tony’s mansion in Malibu.

“Pepper, it’s me. I’ve got a lot of apologies to make and not a lot of time. So first off, I’m so sorry I put you in harm’s way. That was selfish and stupid and it won’t happen again. ...And I’m sorry in advance because I can’t come home yet. I need to find this guy. You got to stay safe. That’s all I know.” —Tony Stark, Iron Man 3

Yes, Tony absolutely provoked the Mandarin, a known terrorist, and the result is the complete annihilation of Tony’s home. Tony accepts responsibility for the destruction as though he was the one who shot the missiles himself. He goes so far as to volunteer himself for a solo mission to find the Mandarin without even bothering to contact SHIELD or the Avengers for help. He made this mess, he’s going to clean it up. All the while he suffers through crippling anxiety and panic attacks, demonstrating that the burden he’s put on his own shoulders is, in fact, too much for him to handle by himself. Still, Tony denies himself the comforts of home and family until he can atone for his wrongdoings.

Miraculously, Iron Man 3 gives Tony a respite when the tables are turned and, for once, Tony is the one ultimately saved by Pepper. After her rescue (pun intended), Tony gives up the armor, commits to having the shrapnel taken out of his chest, and he starts rebuilding the literal ruins of his life—both physical and metaphorical.

The respite doesn’t last, of course, because recovery doesn’t go in a straight line—oh, and also the franchise isn’t over and the MCU kinda needs Iron Man. And so Tony slides back into familiar, self-destructive patterns.

"Few years ago, I almost lost [Pepper], so I trashed all my suits. Then, we had to muck up Hydra. And then Ultron. My fault. And then, and then, and then. I never stopped. 'Cause the truth is, I don't wanna stop.” —Tony Stark, Civil War

Tony taking on the mantle of the Messianic Archetype once more in Endgame falls perfectly in line with his established need to compulsively and perpetually atone for his sins. As a perfectionist who needs to assuage his guilt for his ongoing (and perceived) failures, Tony simply can’t stop himself from offering up his life in penance. Statistically it was bound to catch up with him, and in Endgame it does.

And not only does Tony give his life in true Messianic fashion, we are “treated” to a hyper-realistic and painfully extended sequence where his life drains out of him as his loved ones gather to witness him gasping out his last breath. (Thanks for that, by the way, Marvel. I’ll put this scene with the dead baby bunnies my childhood cat used to bring home as gifts. How thoughtful.)

Maybe the reason for the intensity of Tony’s death scene is to make the audience believe his death is the Real Thing, not some comic-book-superhero-movie trickery that he’ll be back from in a few minutes’ time. Perhaps it’s the only way to ensure we commit to the emotional depth of the moment. Perhaps the filmmakers see it as an homage to RDJ’s acting talent and commitment to the role. Regardless of the rationale behind the camera’s unflinching gaze, Tony’s excruciating death hammers home the brutal and lonely reality of the Messianic Archetype: it’s cruel to put the fate of the world on one person’s shoulders.

But Tony embraces that end. He throws himself into the machinery of fate, convinced he’s the cog that will make it all work.

And he does make it work.

So why is that a problem?

The Team-Oriented Universe

The problem with Tony doubling (tripling? quadrupling?) down on the Messianic Archetype at the apex of the franchise is that the MCU is an ensemble, team-oriented universe.

“You think you're the only superhero in the world? Mr. Stark, you've become part of a bigger universe, you just don't know it yet." —Nick Fury, Iron Man

Fury tells us from the get-go that Tony isn’t the be-all-end-all of the MCU. It’s possible for Tony—for them all—to become something greater than the sum of their parts.

“There was an idea, Stark knows this, called the Avengers Initiative. The idea was to bring together a group of remarkable people, see if they could become something more.” —Nick Fury, Avengers

The entire first Avengers movie is dedicated to establishing this premise, to getting these knuckleheads to work together because, alone, they’re too wrapped up in their own bullshit to adequately deal with the forces that threaten the planet. Things don’t start to go right for them until they set aside their personal issues and act as a unit.

As we all know, our team passes the test and they establish an important principle of the MCU: teamwork is powerful and it’s more effective than working solo.

True, Tony’s self-sacrifice in the context of the Battle of New York helps save the day; but it’s only one part of a coordinated effort. Tony chucking the nuke into space would have been pointless without the added efforts of Steve to coordinate civilian safety, Hawkeye to relay enemy movements, Thor to separate Loki from the scepter, Natasha to close the portal, and Hulk to subdue Loki and ultimately catch Tony as he fell from the wormhole. The team achieved a better outcome together than they each could have achieved separately.

But even in the shared afterglow of winning the Battle of New York, the individual members of the team struggle to perfect their dynamic. New challenges present themselves. There’s always room for the team to grow and become stronger together as the franchise progresses. That’s the whole point.

Tony, for his part, waffles back and forth between his desire to be the savior mechanic (to fix everything by himself) and his desire to work cooperatively with his found-family of superheroes for the common good. This internal conflict plays out over the course of the franchise as Tony takes on the Mandarin by himself in Iron Man 3. The issue then escalates in Age of Ultron when Tony convinces Bruce to help him create Ultron, unbeknownst to the rest of the team. Murder-bot problems and team drama ensue. Tony’s cycle of guilt perpetuates itself in the wake of the disaster in Sokovia, which prompts Tony to adopt the Sokovia Accords. He submits himself and the team to UN governance in Civil War. More team drama ensues.

The logical progression of this escalating team conflict should have involved Tony confronting his deep-seated compulsion to destroy himself for the sake of others. This is exactly the problem Pepper keeps trying to point out to him—his Messianic tendencies have started to cause more problems than they solve.

“There is nothing except this. ... There's the next mission, and nothing else.” —Tony Stark, Iron Man

Tony has struggled from the beginning to find the right balance between personal sacrifice and sharing team effort.

Pepper frequently tries to remind Tony that he doesn’t live alone in the world, he can’t do it all by himself. And there are people who want him to live.

“You’re all I have, too, you know.” —Pepper Potts, Iron Man

Imagine how emotionally satisfying it would have been to see Tony outgrow his need for sacrificial penance and internalize a better lesson: that the savior can be saved, the burden can be shared, and life can go on.

A Better Ending for Tony

The MCU had the perfect opportunity to give us an ending that would be happier for Tony and a better fit for a team-centric universe.

In Guardians of the Galaxy we see Peter Quill and his team survive the power of an Infinity Stone by working together to share the burden of its energy.

Peter Quill is the son of a Celestial—he’s basically immortal up until the end of Guardians of the Galaxy Volume 2. That’s why he and his team could hold the stone without any ill effects.

Also, they only had to channel the power of one stone. Not six.

That’s a fair point.

But by the time Tony had all of the Infinity Stones in Endgame, the battlefield was chock full of all kinds of superheroes. Wanda and Carol by themselves are embodiments of two of the Infinity Stones. Hulk had managed to bear all of the stones by himself earlier in the movie. Steve, T’challa, and Bucky are enhanced super soldiers. Thor, Valkyrie, and the other Asgardians might not be Celestials, but they are gods—and there were a lot of them on that field.

And we’re supposed to believe none of these characters could offer any help to Tony whatsoever? None of them could hold Tony’s hand for a single minute to save his life?

There are plenty of arguments that could be made: Tony was too fast, no one knew what was happening, or everyone else was occupied in battle. But at the end of the day, it’s a choice the creative team made. Tony died because they wanted him to die.

And not much would have to change to save his life.

Imagine this: Tony gets the stones from Thanos and, in true Messianic Archetype fashion, he commits to making the snap, fully expecting it means his death—but then Pepper is there and Pepper has always been the one asking Tony to stop offering up his life to pay for some imaginary debt he thinks he owes. He hesitates, and it’s just long enough for Carol and Wanda swoop in, putting their hands on him and taking the brunt of the energy. Thor and Steve and Bruce and Clint pile on. Peter Parker links up, too, and on and on until the entire rest of the team, all across the battlefield, are in contact with each other and alight with power, channeling the energy of the six stones, keeping Thanos and his monsters at bay.

Tony can still have his ultra-badass “I am Iron Man” moment as he stands at the center of this surging and fluxing cosmic energy—but this time he does it with support. There are people who care about him (and each other) on all sides. And there are so many of them. Tony isn’t the only one who matters, he’s just the lynch pin that holds it all together.

Tony is Iron Man.

More importantly? Together they’re all the Avengers.

*SNAP*

The universe is set right.

Maybe Tony doesn’t escape entirely unscathed. Maybe he loses his arm as suggested by this post. Maybe the others all leave with their own scars, too. But Tony’s alive and he’s finally, deeply aware of what it means to transcend the limits of personal sacrifice and share the hero’s burden with others.

He knows now exactly what the Avengers are capable of. Oh, and by the way? That protective shield he wanted around the world in Age of Ultron? Here they all are. All these wonderful, powerful people are going to protect the Earth. And you know what? They don’t need Tony Stark’s myopic self-sacrifice to do it.

Tony finally feels like he’s done enough—and maybe now he believes there are other heroes out there who can do better than he can. Anyway, he gets to go home to Morgan and Pepper and he finds that it’s not so hard for him to let the new kids do the tough jobs now. He happily goes back to his role as “consultant” for the Avengers, he’s a mad inventor helping change the world for the better, and he also gets to have the long adventure of being a husband and a dad. He doesn’t have to choose one identity over the other—he’s Iron Man. He can redefine what the job means whenever he wants to.

(Also, he finds a way to rescue Nat because she didn’t deserve to be fridged like that. Just saying.)

This ending, or any number of variations like it, would have allowed Tony to finally show real growth at the end of his character arc, instead of succumbing to the same old self-destructive pattern we've seen from him time and time again. And it would have reinforced the theme of teamwork and its power to elevate all those who participate.

Maybe it’s cheesy, but you know what? It’s the ending I wanted. I know I’m not alone.

Tony’s Not Really Dead, You Say?

“There’s no need to be upset about Tony’s death,” some might say. “Tony’s gonna come back!”

Resurrection is a huge part of the Messianic Archetype—and it might be that the filmmakers do intend to bring Tony back in some later movie. It might be they simply want Tony’s death in Endgame to sit a little while longer so it has a greater impact. (Gotta push for that best picture Oscar, right? The Oscars hate superhero movies, but they do love a sad ending.)

While I’m wishing for things, maybe Marvel will also release the multiple alternate endings they filmed for Endgame, essentially creating a “choose your own adventure.” Maybe we’ll all be able to pick the ending we like best and forget the rest exist.

But I can’t make a judgement based on what might be, I can only say how I feel based on what we were given in the theater—for all intents and purposes, that’s the official story Marvel wants to share.

The Endgame narrative insists there’s only one possible path to victory against Thanos. The “one possible path” is basically the equivalent of the creative team saying, “Don’t @ me.” There certainly must have been an impossible number of endings they could have put on film. Tony’s death is the one they picked.

So, sorry for @ing you, Marvel, I guess, but there’s just one more point I want to make...

A Personal Note

RDJ acted the hell out of Tony's final scene. He acted the hell out of the whole franchise. Tony's death was powerful and intensely moving. I wanted to ugly cry in the lobby after the movie was over, and I was upset for days after.

So. Good job, Marvel. You got in some surprises and you wrung out some feelings from viewers like me. Now that the movie’s taken the world by storm, the surprises will play themselves out. So, I guess the big question is: Will audiences want to revisit this adventure and the feelings you ultimately left them with?

For me? My reluctant answer is: no. I don’t want to see Infinity War or Endgame again. Not really. Not in their entirety. I didn’t mind the slog through Infinity War in 2018 because I thought, Hey, maybe this is leading to an ultimately happy and satisfying conclusion for these characters I care about so much. And, to be fair—right up until the last 15 minutes of Endgame, I was ready to say, “All’s forgiven.”

There’s this thing in storytelling called “payoff.” It’s when you deliver a satisfying resolution or fulfillment to your audience after they commit to your narrative journey. Payoff can be extraordinarily subjective, so, again, I acknowledge that there’s no way to please everyone.

For me, there’s no reward in the resolution of Endgame that makes the slog to its conclusion worth it. Tony’s ending is so needlessly sacrificial, so unnecessarily brutal, that it erases much of the enjoyment I otherwise had in watching the entire rest of the film.

Don’t get me wrong. I like sad movies and scary movies in their own context. I like them when I can choose them and know that’s what I'm getting myself into. Sometimes I want the catharsis of being utterly terrified or brought to tears. Sometimes we need stories to give us the chance to feel deep and scary emotions in a safe environment. That’s an important function of creative work.

And, I mean, truly, Endgame gave us some great acting, great effects. Amazing talent. Really fun and creative moments. I’m not trying to disparage all the work that went into its making.

But I feel like someone took me in a limo to a high-class restaurant to eat caviar and watch sad arthouse theater when all I really wanted was to go into town with my friends for some ice cream and a fun movie.

I didn’t need rainbow-colored sprinkles on my ending, but something a bit sweeter would have been nice. So, well done, Marvel. But also—no, thank you.

As it stands, Endgame was too bitter for my taste.

#avengers #endgame #spoilers #negativity #long post #meta #my rambling #tony stark #iron man

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dyketectivecomics · 5 years ago

Note

23,17,12,6 for the Salty ask list?

23. Unpopular character you love?

MOST recently i’ve been in a BIG Black Alice mood and she's got like.... such limited content when it comes to her tag fjdkslfjl;as i’ve noticed p much any mystic gal other than Zatanna & Raven just. doesnt see any love at all. its depressing actually

17. Instead of XYZ happening, I would have made ABC happen...

RIP to DC but if I wanted to reintroduce Cassandra Cain as a character w/out using NML, I would’ve given her a better moniker to adopt than fucking Orphan. what kind of BULLSHIT. (also just. as much as i like B&R: Eternal for being one of the first stories to get me back into /reading comics/ its just... a hot mess too fjkdlasfjl;d i love it but its MESSY)

12. Is there an unpopular arc that you like that the fandom doesnt? Why?

I don’t think its Unpopular as in Hated, more so Unpopular as in Not Talked About. But anyways y'all know I love Gotham Central and I wish more people would read it & jam about it bc???? It was genuinely good??? If someone was looking for a more Serious/Realistic Look at the world of Gotham, this comic would be it! It’s GCPD’s MCU having to deal with all of the wildest shit Gotham has to throw at them and its!!!!!!! So great just!!!!!!

6. Has fandom ever made you enjoy a pairing you previously hated?

I’m the type of person who’s pretty open to ships. If it’s something that doesn’t immediately click for me I just leave it alone usually fjkdla;s But as far as swaying me into Eventually Liking it.... idk. bc for the pairings i like now, i cant even imagine ever hating them beforehand fjklas;dfjas

now the exact opposite? where a fandom makes me hate a pairing i kinda liked. yeah. it’s The NOTP™ now.

#asked and answered #deadrobots #ask game #y'all sent in so many idk if i'll get to them all before i have to go film again jfkdlsafjal;sk #oh yeah i forgot to tell y'all I'm helping a friend shoot a short film for class so thats fun #its a horror/rom/com and its great. i get to summon a demon and date 'em #y'know. typical college film stuff

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sterek · 6 years ago

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okay, so... tony stark, bucky barnes and peter parker!

tony stark:

favorite thing about them: his devotion to the world around him, how even when the world is trashing his name he’s still fighting for them, his big dumb self sacrificing heart, the fact that in the end HE was the strongest avenger

least favorite thing about them: how much he doesn’t believe that he deserves the world

brOTP: rhodey, peter, nat

OTP: pepper

nOTP: peter, bucky (my two fave marvel characters lol but i can’t emotionally deal with their ship)

random headcanon: he mentioned that he doesn’t have a preference for a gender publicly a bunch of times, and when the media keeps twisting his words he decides to paint one of his suits with the bisexual colors because you either go extra or are dubbed as heterosexual and he ain’t gonna have that

unpopular opinion: he’s always been the heart of the avengers

song i associate with them: hogwarts house: ravenclaw going on gryffindor

favorite picture of them:

bucky barnes:

favorite thing about them: listen he’s right next to derek as the loves of my life, so like EVERYTHING. he’s been through unimaginable pain but he came out of it still with his kind heart and soft soul, never wanting to fight or hurt anyone. he’s so so so strong, and he deserves all the happiness in the world

least favorite thing about them: nothing, i love him for all that he is

brOTP: nat, sam

OTP: STEVE

nOTP: nat

random headcanon: everyone thought he was a ladies man, but in fact he was just taking out lesbian couples every weekend, helping them have some time together without being in danger (and also just to have fun and dance his little heart out or go do nerdy things like the big nerd he is)

unpopular opinion: he gay. also IT WASN’T HIS FAULT, ANY OF IT

song i associate with them: hogwarts house: hufflepuff

favorite picture of them:

peter parker:

favorite thing about them: how he stands up for the little guy, how he may be broke and struggling but will take it all in stride if it means he can keep protecting his city, how he’s a total mess and his heart is bursting with love

least favorite thing about them: that he keeps losing his backpacks, like come on man! use a fanny pack!

brOTP: tony, ned, mj

OTP: wade (comics)

nOTP: tony

random headcanon: at one point he gives tony adoption papers like those kids who get adopted by stepparents later in life and they both cry like big nerds (i love them *sobs*)

unpopular opinion: he deserves to share with carol the right to be the new face of the mcu!

song i associate with them: hogwarts house: gryffindor

favorite picture of them:

send me a character for this!

#ask game #thank you sm!!#stevebarrnes #asks

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stevie-steven-stevington · 6 years ago

Text

Febuwhump Day 2: Peer Pressure

Fandom: MCU Characters: Peter Parker, Tony Stark Category: Gen Relationships: Peter Parker/Ned Leeds (mentioned) Rating: T Warnings: discussions of sex Words 2k

read on ao3

first | previous | next (febuwhump series)

first | previous | next (ace!peter series)

this is a direct sequel to this fic

this is really loosely interpreted lmAO but also loosely based off my own struggles with my sexuality so. take it i guess

“What was your first time like?”

Tony looks over at the kid, hands stilling and eyebrows automatically creeping up his forehead. This is…not what he expected, to say the least. Peter’s been quiet all evening, disconcertingly so - it was clear from the moment he stepped into the building that something was off, but Tony couldn’t quite figure out what is was.

He still has no idea where the hell this is going.

Eh. One way to find out.

“My...first time,” Tony repeats, slowly. Just to be sure he heard it right.

Peter won’t look at him, eyes trained on the table in front of him. His voice is small when he says, “Yeah. Like - like the first time you -”

“No, I know, kid.” Tony squints at him, as if that will make this any clearer. He wants to ask - why on Earth do you want to know? - but he gets the feeling that the question wouldn’t be appreciated right now. “I, uh - my first time was…short. Awkward. It kind of sucked, to be honest.”

The kid nods slightly, absently chewing on the fingernail of his left thumb. There’s something...sad, in his demeanor, in his posture, in the way he holds himself, and Tony wants nothing more than to put an end to whatever or whoever put it there.

It’s quiet for a moment. Tony can practically feel Peter thinking, and he turns back to his work, giving Peter space to work out whatever it is he needs to work out.

Eventually, gaze still downcast, muffled around the finger in his mouth, Peter says, “So did it…it got better, right? After the - the first time, I mean, it got better?” Something is so wrong here.

This is such a loaded question, it’s clear in Peter’s tone. Though loaded with what, he doesn’t know. There’s layers to this whole conversation, really, like there’s something he’s supposed to say but no one bothered to tell him what it is. This wasn’t exactly in the Mentoring a Teenage Spiderling handbook.

(He wonders if this was in the Parenting a Teenage Spiderling handbook, and then he reminds himself that neither of those actually exist.)

This feels like a test of some sorts. Like this, rather than anything Spider-Man related, is the big test of whether or not he’s actually good at this whole mentor thing.

Okay.

Alright, Tones, you can do this. It’s just a kid. It’s just Peter.

Except there is no “just Peter”. Don’t fuck this kid up, Tony.

Is it really going to fuck up the kid if I mess up this one conversation? Seems like it might.

…Shit. It kind of does.

“Yeah,” Tony replies, jaw tight with something like nerves. Peter stiffens, almost imperceptibly, and Tony feels like his words are already wrong. Turns out, his words are wrong a lot of the time, so he’s not surprised. But now he’s stuck in his answer. “Yeah, I mean, it - yes, it took a while to figure things out. To figure out what worked and what didn’t and all that.” It’s the truth. What else is he supposed to say?

Peter doesn’t say anything, one foot kicking back and forth against the floor. He looks so small, so young, sitting at his work station (the one Tony set up specifically for him, because he’s like that, he’s always been like that).

Tony forgets, sometimes, that Peter’s just a kid. That the actual superhero sitting in his lab is just sixteen years old. A high school junior. A child.

An impressionable kid who’s currently asking him, Tony fucking Stark, playboy extraordinaire, about sex.

Well, it’s not like he has many other people to go to, Tony supposes. The list of trusted adults in Peter’s life is a rousing two, and maybe he just thought it’d be less awkward with him than with his aunt. Or maybe he just knows that Tony has more...experience in this department. The kid is still silent. Which is not only concerning, but also sort of disturbing.

Peter doesn’t do quiet. Peter always talks, always has something or other to say, always aims to fill the silence even when he seems like he hates the sheer act of taking up space.

The roles are reversed now, it seems. Tony doesn’t like it.

“Pete -” Hearing his name jolts Peter out of whatever stupor he’s in and he interrupts, finger dropping from his mouth, as if Tony hadn’t even spoken. “So you made it better. You - you found the things that f-felt good and you worked with those, yeah?” “I...I guess,” Tony says, and his voice sounds strange even to his own ears. Peter hasn’t stuttered around him in ages. The hero worship hasn’t quite worn off, exactly, but the stuttering hasn’t been an issue in forever. “But listen, kid -” “So you didn’t just...automatically like it. It wasn’t s-something that just - just clicked?” Peter barrels on, head finally jerking up to look at Tony. There’s desperation in his eyes. A sharp, hysterical type of desperation that Tony hates, hates more than anything else he’s ever seen on Peter’s face. He’s seen fear, he’s seen pain, and he’s seen anger in Peter, more times than he’d like to say, but none of that compares to the distress he sees now. “Everyone always says that it just clicks, that - that - that you’re just supposed to know what to do and how to do it and what feels good and what you want and -”

“Peter.”

“What?” The kid is practically panting, what with all his words coming out in one breath. And it’s hard to tell from across the lab, but he thinks Peter is shaking.

“Look, Underoos, if you - if you have questions, I’m more than willing to give you the answers. If you want to know what’s what, I’m here for you, okay? But Pete, you came out to me like two months ago.” Tony scrubs a hand across his face, left wrist twinging in that way that it does, every so often. “I mean, if you’re telling me now that you’re actually not asexual, if you’re not sex...averse, was it? Then okay. That’s okay, Pete, if your label has changed, that’s fine, buddy. But if that’s it, then you have to tell me, because right now, you’re kind of scaring me.”

For a second, Peter just stares at him. Then he shakes his head, slowly, like he wishes he didn’t have to. “It’s - it’s not. I’m…still asexual.” “Okay. Okay.” Tony stands and walks over to Peter, kneeling next to the stool he’s sat on. Because he was right. Something is so wrong. “Then why are you asking about sex as if you’re thinking about having it, Pete?”

Peter looks down again, staring at his hands. Tony has to lean down and tilt his head a little to see Peter’s face, and he watches in vague horror as the kid’s eyes fill with tears. “I just…if everyone else has to work at it for them to like sex, why - why can’t I?” Shit. Shit.

That’s what this is.

He’d thought, when Peter came out to him two months ago, that he was comfortable in it. Relatively so, at least. That he done all the soul-searching, that he had accepted himself, that he didn’t need any help with all of it. And he was wrong, clearly.

Fuck.

He’s been trying so damn hard not to be like his father. And yet, here he is, with no idea what the hell his kid needs.

His kid.

Peter’s not his kid. Not biologically, at least.

But who is he kidding? In some way, somehow, whatever that way may be, Peter’s his kid. And his kid needs him to say the right thing here.

“Peter…Peter, look at me.” When he doesn’t, Tony lifts his head up with two gentle fingers. Peter’s eyes dart around for a moment before settling on Tony’s nose. Not quite what he was going for, but he’ll take it. “Peter, the reason my first time sucked was because I was fifteen, stupid, and immature. I didn’t know what I was doing and neither did the girl I was with. God, we were in a car, Peter. I had sex for the first time in the back of a car, at fifteen years old, and it sucked. “But it still felt good, Peter. Emotionally, at least. Because I wanted it. Because my partner wanted it. Even if it was reckless and dumb and I wish, in retrospect, that I’d waited, we still both wanted it. Sex is never going to feel good if you don’t want it to begin with.”

“But - but -” Tony pushes a few wayward strands of hair off of Peter’s forehead. “Peter, what’s going on?” Tears run down Peter’s cheeks, and he makes no move to wipe them away. He just sits there, hands trembling on the table in front of him, and cries.

And then he’s sobbing, full-on sobbing, and saying, “T-there’s just so much pressure, Mr. Stark. I - everyone is h-having sex and then everyone is talking about it. Everything’s about sex and I - I know that sex isn’t everything, but god, it’s hard to believe that when virgin is the latest insult that p-people toss around at school. I - I just, I feel like I’m m-missing something, like I’m - I’m -”

“Like you’re what, Peter?”

“Like I’m broken,” Peter chokes out, and Tony actually feels his heart break.

Fuck, he doesn’t know how to deal with this. The first time he’d even heard the word asexual outside of high school biology class was from Peter. He’s never had to deal with peer pressure, or general societal pressure, when it comes to sex, because he’s never not wanted to have sex.

What do you say to a kid who doesn’t want the one thing everyone else seems to be obsessed with?

Tony rests a hand on Peter’s knee, takes a breath, and gives it his best damn shot. “Kid, you - you’re not broken, okay? Not wanting sex doesn’t make you broken. Does it make you different? Sure, in a way. But so does being Spider-Man. So does being a sixteen-year-old who can lift a car. Is that a bad thing?”

Peter sniffles. “No.” “And neither is being asexual. Just because something makes you different does not mean it makes you broken. Not everyone wants sex. Not every couple has sex. I - I know it feels like the whole damn world revolves around sex, but that doesn’t mean your world has to. That doesn’t mean that you’re wrong for not wanting it.” “But - but what if...someone I’m dating wants -” “Ned’s not pressuring you, is he?”

Peter blinks in surprise at him. “What? No. Jesus, no, of course not. He - he’d never. Just - I mean, we’re sixteen, I know there’s - there’s no guarantee that I’ll be with Ned forever. What if someone else, somewhere down the line, wants...something that I can’t give them?”

Tony sighs. “I don’t - Pete, look, I don’t have all the answers. I can’t tell you what will happen somewhere down the line or - or how to handle some hypothetical future relationship. But what I will say is just…don’t hurt yourself to help someone else. Don’t - don’t force yourself to do something you don’t want to do to please another person, whether they’re your boyfriend or girlfriend or husband or wife or whatever. You take care of yourself first, alright?”

A pause, then Peter nods. “I - okay. I will.”

“Good. And kid, I know I can’t just fix all of this with one little pep talk. I know that…accepting yourself, your sexuality, it takes a lot more than someone telling you that it’s okay. But it is. It is okay - it’s more than okay, it’s perfect. Because it’s you. And you are perfect just the way you are, Peter.”

Finally, finally, a smile. A watery, shaky smile, but a smile nonetheless. Take that, Howard.

“It might -” Peter swipes a hand across his cheeks, sniffs, starts again. “It might take a while for me to…to believe that. To really, actually believe it. But it’s really nice to hear, Mr. Stark.”

“I’ll say it as many times as you need me to, kiddo.”

“I know. Thank you...Tony,” Peter says, and the smile widens.

And it’s not okay. Not now, not yet.

But it’s better.

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tshollandlove · 7 years ago

Text

Ava’s 1.5k Celebration!

while it may not seem like much to many, i am so thankful for achievement of 1,500 followers that i have reached. it may seem odd to do a celebration at a half point rather than when i would reach two thousand, but given that i don’t know when/if that will occur, i figured why not show some extra love now.

now, to the celebration!

first of all, i’ll be holding a sleepover tonight! i’ll be doing whatever you want and answering whatever questions you want while i work on your celebration requests! the sleepover post will be made soon. [sleepover post]

send to my ask box a ✨+ 1 way i can improve my account (don’t worry about being rude to receive a blog rating and compliment!

send to my ask box a 💕+ a short description of yourself to receive a ship! specify whether holland boys&haz, mcu characters, or mcu actors.

send to my ask box a 🌸+ a piece of writing for a reblog and review! (don’t be afraid to submit your own work)

send to my ask box a 🎶+ music/artists you like to receive a personal playlist!

and finally the part of the celebration i am very excited for...

send to my ask box a 💫 for a personalized social media imagine! that means you can message me a personal photo, i will include your name rather than y/n, and you can request an edit for any mcu character, actor, or holland boy&haz. you can have it as personal as you wanting with your name and photo, or just name, or just photo, however you like.

you can request as many of these as you want! also, please participate in the sleepover! thank you to all that follow, i appreciate it so much and i hope you enjoy my account!

i also want to thank some amazing people that i would not be at this point without them.

@bi-writes: yeah, i wrote an entire post about her last night, but i will never be able to show this girl all the love that she deserves so i will just write more know. b, you have no idea how much your support and love means to me. you have been there for me with boys, douche racist girls (light skinned latinas unite), discovering a new part of my womanhood, and so much more. you have always been there for me and i know you will continue to do so, and for that i thank you.

@upsidedownparker: kath, girl, you are my southern sister that does the same as me, being passively aggressive via politeness to jerks, while also letting them know not be a jerk. you have always been one of my favorite writers, and i didn’t even know that you knew that i existed until you reblogged a part from piece by piece and reacted to it and i just felt so much love. from there a friendship formed and we have backed each other up with rude anons on both of our ends and you have just always shown love to me, and for that i thank you.

@my-meant-to-find-blog: BABE, you are like the best. you always liked my posts, kind of watching from afar and then the first time you ever messaged me was when you saw i was having a hard time with my anxiety and depression and you immediately swooped in to help. we bonded over how messed up we both are and over our love for pizza. i remember from one of the first times we talked you used a term that confused me so much so i had to look it up on urban dictionary. you english twit, i thought i was going crazy because i had never headr this phrase before. lol. you showed me love and compassion when i felt the whole world was against me, and you’ve continued to do that, and for that reason i thank you.

there are so many more people to thank, but if i wrote out a paragraph for every person that i appreciate, we would be here all day because i appreciate the support of each and everyone of my followers!

amazing followers and mutuals that i love: @infamous-webhead @arya-di-angelo @casualprincess77 @princess-chocolate-drop @zophora @hollanderheart @s-p-i-d-e-y-c-h-e-l-l-e @hollandroos @spiderlingss @spideykisses @petersparkers @thewiseandfree @starksparker @ibtomholland @spideykisses @lilyholland @beansparker @anavengerstale @princeofsassgard @farrahsficrec @superflashallen @pho105 @cap-steve-rogers

#ava's 1.5k celebration #tom holland #marvel #peter parker #infinity war #tom holland imagine #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland x reader #spiderman #thomas stanley holland

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imsfire2 · 7 years ago

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Marvel asks: All of them! Sorry, can't choose! ^^'

AAAAARRRGGHHHH!!! Well that’ll larn me!

Marvel asks

Tony Stark: favorite movie?

Close call; I’m very fond of “Avengers Assemble”, “Thor” and “CA:TWS”, but the one that has wowed me the most of all was “Black Panther”, which took everything to a new level of brilliance.

Drax: what character would you wanna be friends with?

I’m going to make this “characterS” and say Jane Foster, Aunt May, and General Okoye. A lot of my other faves probably wouldn’t be so easy to be friends with (too prickly, messed-up, hyper-focussed, downright dangerous, etc) but I would love to be mates with these three!

Valkyrie: favorite director?

Ryan Coogler, no question!

Pepper Potts: top 3 fave characters

Ugh, very hard to choose! Most of our protagonists are pretty cool, in their different ways. Let’s pick three of the women; Okoye, Gamora, Natasha. But I could just as easily have said Nakia, Hope and Hawkeye. Or Rocket, Groot and Shuri. Or...

Yeah, very hard to choose.

Sam Wilson: funniest scene?

Unlike a lot of people I loathed the relentless humour in “Ragnarok”. So I’m going to say, Sam and Cap’s first meeting in TWS, which is gentle and kind, and character-driven.

And (although it’s rather sick humour) “He’s adopted” is very funny.

Bucky Barnes: most heartbreaking moment?

The bit in TWS when the pilots try to take off and provide air support and are shot down before they can get to their planes. Reduces me to tears every time.

Nakia: character you wish had a bigger role?

I want to see more of Shuri!

Rocket Racoon: best nickname?

I don’t think I know the scripts well enough! “Legolas”, possibly?

Natasha Romanoff: favorite ass kicking scene?

Another one that’s very hard to choose.

Natasha’s first scene, maybe, when she’s barefoot and unarmed and still beats the shit out of half a dozen brawny guys. It’s such a great use of an action scene to establish character. I also love her fight with possessed!Hawkeye.

But on the other hand, the Dora Milje’s team fighting style is unbelievably awesome...

Ned Leeds: favorite villain?

Killmonger, no contest. He’s rounded, believable, well-motivated, and even though you know he’s wrong you empathise with him. Masterclass in how to write a top-notch antagonist.

I also really liked Toomes/Vulture in “Spiderman Homecoming”. Again, because he had good motivation and was an interesting rounded character, not a cardboard “I wanna rule/destroy the world >snarl snarl

Bruce Banner: guardians or avengers?

For sheer fun, Guardians. But I’m enjoying seeing them all meet up!

Thor Odinson: most attractive character?

Still Hawkeye. Give me those Renner arms.

Gamora: favorite pairing?

As in Ship? T’Challa/Nakia, and Gamora/Peter Q.

As in Best mates? Rocket & Groot, Peggy & Jarvis, and Peter P & Ned.

Mantis: what do you think will happen in Avengers 4?

I’m with @hanorganaas on this; it’ll have to involve time travel in some form, to bring back at least some of those lost. Also I have it on good authority from @spectralarchers that Hawkeye will come back as Ronin. And clearly a certain Carol Danvers is going to be involved.

There’ll be an opening section where the traumatised survivors are trying to regroup in a shattered world. Somehow or other the script will have to contrive another “lowest ebb” moment even lower than the end of “Infinity War” (& I don’t envy the people tasked with that!) because that’s how script dynamics work. But ultimately the big purple knob-head will be defeated.

Shuri: most rewatched movie?

Either “Avengers assemble” or “Guardians of the Galaxy”; I haven’t kept count, but they are the ones I go back to for a happy evening slobbed out in front of the telly with a big bag of tortilla chips.

Peter Parker: best outfit/suit?

As a Superhero Suit, I love the Ant-man suit!

As actual wearable clothes, I’d like to have Gamora’s leathers, especially the red coat; practical and sexy.

Happy Hogan: what ‘superpower’ is the coolest?

Well, I’ve always wanted to be able to fly, so any of the superpowers that give you that would be great!

I also love the way Mantis’ abilities take something that culturally is just expected of “nice good girls” (being empathetic, reading others emotions and reactions, being able to soothe down even the most aggressive person) and make it a fucking superpower!

Aunt may: most painful death?

After those brave pilots in TWS? Pietro. Really didn’t see that one coming.

Pietro Maximoff: Peter Quill or Peter Parker?

Aww, don’t make me chose! Quill is so cute!

I was never a Peter Parker fan until Tom Holland but now - ok, Peter Parker.

Heimdall: would you like a Deadpool crossover?

Properly done, then hell yeah! But it would need a very, very good script to juggle the emotional/tonal switchbacks required.

Steve Rogers: who resembles their role the most?

From what we get to see as fans? I’d have to go with Chris Evans.

Rhodey: who resembles their role the least?

Karen Gillan certainly doesn’t sound much like Nebula!

T’challa: favorite non-romantic pairing?

I’ve already suggested a couple of Best-mates relationships; so how about some siblings? Gamora and Nebula; so much tension, so much anger and yet so much torn, blood-soaked loyalty. It’s just as interesting a dynamic as the one between Thor and Loki, with a lot less screentime than that has had.

I also liked the sibling loyalty and love between Wanda and Pietro. Always good to see a happy sibling relationship, when Screenwriting 101 would have it that only sibling rivalry is interesting...

Peter Quill: favorite place in the mcu?

That’s going to be a tie between Know-where, for the visuals, and Wakanda, for - well, everything really.

Loki laufeyson: best line/quote?

Ugh, there have been a lot of great lines. Right now, I’m going to go with Okoye’s “For Wakanda? Without question.” Such a fantastic use of a single line to cement how her character is the embodiment of honour.

Scott Lang: do you think you’d have died in the snap?

Hmm. I kind of hope I would, to be honest; life afterwards is going to be spectacularly hellish until they manage to fix it.

Stephen strange: favorite song used?

The opening of “Guardians of the Galaxy”, with Quill slogging through the rain and then putting on “Come and get your love” on his walkman and starting to dance. Just gorgeous; as a sequence, as framing, as a way of telling us something about him very economically, as a device to show us this is going to be a hell of a fun ride...

Phil Coulson: the moment you fell in love with your favorite character?

Seeing as I find it impossibly difficult to pick a favourite in the first place, this is one I can’t answer!

Okoye: which movies did you see in cinema?

All of them bar the first two “Iron Man” films.

Maria Hill: favorite special credits?

What, as in “Mr Evans’ marmalade sandwiches made by” kind of thing? I’m not sure I pay enough attention to the credits to have ever noticed one (I made that one up, needless to say).

Or are “special credits” like cameos? A nod to the mourners for Yondu, then.

Erik Killmonger: favorite press moment/interview

Way back during the press tour for “Avengers assemble”; a journalist asked RDJ in-depth questions on Tony’s motivation and development, and then only asked Scarlett Johansson some ridiculous thing about her diet; and instead of answering with a patient smile she called him out on it.

It was only, what, five years ago, yet it was almost unheard-of then for a female actor to bite back publically like that. And the good thing is, that already seems pretty extraordinary.

Wanda Maximoff: favorite relationship of the actors?

I don’t know enough about their relationships to have one, really.

Nebula: favorite minor character?

Luis. An “ordinary person” character who is highly likeable in his own right and who does the right thing even when he knows it’s bloody dangerous & could get him killed. For similar reasons I’m also very fond of Cameron Klein and Dr Helen Cho.

Vision: Steve with or without a beard?

Without, definitely. Not a great fan of beards to be honest. There’s the odd face that looks great with one (thinking of a certain Mexican actor and rare fern collector) but mostly they’re just fashionable face-fur.

Nick Fury: what actor would you like to see join the mcu and for what role?

On one level, I’m content to wait and see what they come up with. I’m not a comic-reader, so I know almost nothing about any of the characters until they appear in the MCU, which makes dream-casting any of them pretty difficult.

On the other hand, I did read a rumour that John Boyega is in line for a future role; and as I’m a huge fan of his I would love for that to be true!

Hope Van Dyne: expectations for ‘Captain Marvel’?

As a non-comics person, I don’t know anything about the character or her story. Hopefully we’ll get an interesting, well-rounded female lead with solid motivation and her plot-line isn’t primarily about a) a man or b) not being able to have children. Or c) her children being dead.

Groot: I am Groot?

We are Groot.

Grandmaster: which characters would you like to see interact more?

Shuri with all the scientists!

Peggy Carter: Hulk or Banner?

Both. Both is good.

Luis: favorite Chris?

I’m sure they’re all lovely chaps.

Michelle Jones: would you like a Black Widow movie?

I’d like to see lots of the female characters get stand-alone films. So, yes please to a “Black Widow” movie, but also, hmm, let’s see; how about a “Shuri and Jane Foster Science the Shit Out Of This Mess” movie? A “Peggy Carter and the early days of SHIELD” movie? A “Nakia the Super-spy” movie?

Sif: long hair Thor or short hair Thor?

Long hair. Markedly more appealing with long hair.

Jane Foster: favorite character development?

I love the way Steve Rogers’ story kind-of goes in cycles of effort and hope and bitter experience, and always comes back round to situations where he affirms who he essentially is. It’s good to see a non-liner pattern of development like that, which is much closer to how real people deleop and change, instead of the standard narrative “A to B” model like Dr Strange (”was a jerk, learned to do better” - okay, he saves the world, so that’s good; but as for development, pish).

Yondu: favorite after-credit scene?

The Shawarma joint.

Also Hope seeing the Wasp suit for the first time.

Wong: favorite marvel intro?

Not sure I pay that much attention to the intros, tbh. I’m just sitting there thinking “Give me the story, folks!”

Thank you for asking! - and thank you, if you’ve had the patience to slog through all this, for reading!

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rohdutch · 7 years ago

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I don’t know anything about movies so do it. :-D answer as many as you can from 1-60

Oh my gooooodddddd. Soph this will be my death. Okay, okay, I got this.

1. A movie you’ve seen most times in the cinema.

I’ve never seen a movie more than once in theater, but I kind of wish that I would’ve gone to see Gifted more than once bc crying in the theater is an e x p e r i e n c e.

2. Your most rewatched movie.

Captain America: The Winter Soldier

3. A movie you quote on a daily basis.

I just quoted Mean Girls earlier today.

4. Favorite movie soundtrack.

The Greatest Showman.

5. Top 5 films of your favorite actor and actress.

I’ll choose Sebastian Stan for this (even tho Richard Armitage is my favorite):

-the Bronze

-I, Tonya

-the Martian

-the Captain America trilogy

-Gone

Meg Ryan:

-Fan Girl

-Anastasia

-Sleepless in Seattle

-You’ve Got Mail

-City of Angels

6. Top 5 performances of your favorite actor and actress.

Seb’s are the same except replace Gone with Political Animals, his performance as TJ is iconic and I’m so sad they ended that show. Meg’s are the same too.

7. A movie storyline you wished you had actually lived.

I’ve always dreamt of being apart of the Fast & Furious movies soooo

8. A movie that reminds you of your mom.

Any of the Star Wars.

9. A movie thar reminds you of your dad.

Grease.

10. Favorite movies from your childhood.

My parents didn’t care what I really watched as a kid so a lot of my favorites consist of actual kids movies and horror movies. Disney movies like Robin Hood (I loved both Disney’s version and Prince of Thieves), Mulan, Cinderella, Aladdin, Lion King 2. And then other movies like Underworld, Van Helsing, Halloween, and Resident Evil. I had a strange obsession with the third Resident Evil.

11. Favorite quote(s).

I can’t remember the exact line, but “that kid from Brooklyn who didn’t know how to walk away from a fight, I’m following him,” which Bucky says to Steve in the first Cap film. And obv any Mean Girls quote.

12. Top 5 female performances.

-Hayley Atwell as Peggy Carter-Emilia Clarke in Me Before You-Helen Mirren in Winchester-Michelle Pfeiffer in Grease 2-Michelle Pfeiffer in Stardust

13. Top 5 male performances.

-Martin Freeman as Everett Ross-Benedict Cumberbatch as Stephen Strange-Sebastian Stan in the Bronze-Leonardo DiCaprio in the Departed-Jack Nicholson in the Departed

14. Favorite year for movies.

I don’t think I have a specific year? Although 2018 has been a fantastic year for movies so far. I do have a preference for movies from 90s and early 2000s.

18. An underrated actor.

A year ago I would’ve said Sebastian Stan, but he’s recently been doing a lot of big things and has like four movies he’s doing that he plays a main character in. Now I’ll shoot for Blair Redford.

19. An underrated actress.

Emilia Clarke. People need to appreciate her more.

20. An underrated director.

Taika Waititi.

21. An overrated actor.

I’ve never cared for George Clooney tbh.

22. An overrated actress.

I love her, but Scarlett Johansson.

23. An overrated director.

Woody Allen. Not even sorry.

24. A film you wish you had seen on the big screen.

Every MCU movie besides Guardians of the Galaxy and Black Panther. I watched Black Panther with my sister and saw Guardians at a drive-in. I had to wait to see all the others :(

25. A movie you’ve seen that you think no one else here will have heard of?

Like Sunday, Like Rain. Please watch it. It’s absolutely amazing.

26. Favorite movie characters.

Oh my gosh. Okay. Doctor Strange. Bucky Barnes. Thorin Oakenshield. Lance Tucker. Everett Ross. Jason Bourne. Owen and Deckard Shaw. There’s more, but that’s who I can think of rn.

27. A film that was better than the book.

I personally prefer the Hobbit movies over the book, but the book is great too.

28. Best Remake.

The Goodbye Girl!

29. Your first favorite actor.

I wanna say it’s Josh Hartnett? Maybe Paul Rudd?? I loved the Halloween movies as a kid and Josh was in H2O while Paul was in the Curse of Michael Myers and I loved them both. As a kid I didn’t really care much about the actors, but I’ve realized a lot of people I liked in movies as a kid are now some of my favorites.

30. Your first favorite actress.

Like I said, loved the Halloween movies. Jamie Lee Curtis. Also Milla Jovavich.

31. Favorite animated film.

I will always, with my entire heart, love Lion King 2. I still have the VHS tape.

32. Your most anticipated films.

Ocean’s 8. Robin Hood. Solo. Ant-Man and the Wasp. Incredibles 2. I wasn’t that into Venom, but after seeing the trailer, I’m pumped.

33. Last movie that disappointed you.

The Apparition was made a while back, but i didn’t watch it til recent and I really didn’t like it whatsoever.

34. Last movie that surpassed your expectations.

Like the Apparition, Dance of the Dead was made a while ago, but I watched it about two months back and oh. My. God. It was glorious. Watch it. It’ll be worth it.

37. Share an unpopular film opinion you have.

I love romance and I don’t mind seeing it in movies that don’t necessarily need it. I mean, of course I draw the line somewhere, but for example, Kili and Tauriel’s romance in the films? I know it wasn’t in the book, and a lot of people didn’t like it, but I loved it.

38. Favorite Oscar win/speech.

This is a tie between two speeches that happened right after one another at the 2017 Oscars. Gael García Bernal’s speech before presenting an award, and the Zootopia directors’ speech when they came up to accept that award. It’s truly a wonderful thing and I remember watching it and being so grateful for people like them.

39. Biggest Oscar snub(s).

Literally. Every. Time. Leonardo. DiCaprio. Lost.

40. Who do you think is overdue for another Oscar nomination/win?

Tom Hanks.

41. How many movies have you seen (rough estimation)?

Close to 1,000, I’d think.

42. A movie that made you go ‘wtf was that’.

The Apparition and The Shape of Water. At least The Shape of Water was actually good 👀👀

43. A film that scarred you.

Oh my god, I don’t know the name, but it was something that was on tv at like 2 am when I slept in the living room one time as a kid and it terrified me. It was something about werewolves and made me question my love of werewolves for days.

44. Most movies watched in a single day.

I once watched 7 of the Fast & Furious movies in one day.

45. A film that always makes you cry.

Gifted. I cried three times when I saw it in theaters and I cry every time I rewatch it.

46. A film that always makes you laugh.

Ferris Bueller’s Day Off.

47. Movies that you think everyone should watch (not necessarily your favorites).

The Jason Bourne series. 10 Things I Hate About You. Blended. Back to School.

48. A movie that took you a couple viewings to appreciate.

Princess & the Frog. Now it’s one of my favorite Disney movies.

49. A book that you want to see adapted to the big screen.

Either I’ll Give You The Sun by Jandy Nelson or Stalking Jack The Ripper by Kerri Maniscalco.

50. A book you really, really, really don’t want to see made into a film.

I love the third Percy Jackson book so so much, and I’d kill to see that scene where they’re all on Apollo’s sun chariot on the big screen, but if it turned out like the other two Percy Jackson movies I don’t think I’d ever forgive myself.

54. Favorite coming-of-age film.

Like Sunday, Like Rain.

55. Favorite superhero film.

The first Captain America just bc it’s nostalgic for both me and those characters, and Doctor Strange. I love the Winter Soldier too so I might as well include it.

57. Movies you know you should watch, but can’t bring yourself to do it?

Thor: Ragnarok. That’s the only one I’m absolutely sure that I need to watch.

58. Favorite genres.

I’m a big rom-com and action geek tbh.

59. Least favorite genres.

Not a huge fan of paranormal type horrors, but once in a while I’ll find one I like (like Winchester).

60. Biggest movie pet peeve.

I’m not too picky, I guess? I just don’t like when they don’t give enough details so the story doesn’t make sense or they mess up and the facts don’t match up.

Yep. It’s official. Sophia, I’m dead.

#i hope the layout of this isn't weird bc i spent so long making sure it didnt end up as a block of text #i skipped the ones that had a fill in the blank or ones i didnt have an answer to #this took me so long omg #soph i hope youre happy

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