#also i have yet to read far so i dont know about his past (if it's been mentioned in the novel)

[sealsshitpostden]

Get into other fandoms, we will welcome you happily, Your feelings of attachment to the franchise ARE valid...but you HAVE to face them, and learn to move on.

I am very sure that if you ask anyone in a fandom ¨hey, i wanna get int something new, i want to get away from hp ¨ they WILL help you out, and i know i myself would too! Its always fun to get into a new hobbie...But as it stands, hp is a cancer that needs to be extirpated, please, please see it as it is...i beg of you...Others can make it easier for you, but...you have to make the choice to move on yourself. Fuck it, literally DM me if you are interested! I will get you into 7 different things that will completely take over you if you let them, i am into so many fandoms. Play limbus company if you want something gritty, yet wonderfully written, and with a fair share of silly! I have 1300 hours on that game, and its a gacha game so you WONT have time to even think about hp, or if you dont want that, try out library of ruina! it is an amazing story with a greatly designed ¨beat enemy, get to use enemy's power¨ that i think you guys might like! Lobotomy corporation also exists, if you like the thrill of overcoming impossible odds, and SCP...AND the fanbase is welcoming to an almost fanatic degree! Join us, we are totally not a cult. Get into retroachievements, play games from before you were born, or from when you were a kid but never played, some games can take months and months Play VRchat if you want to meet people or, fuck it even get into ERP, i do not care and noone else will in the slightest Balatro exists, You probably know of it. Read Percy jackson, its a classic for a reason...and fuck it, if you wanna keep at it with ¨magic school¨ you can play a minecraft modpack with some friends that is focused on magic! theres a ton of them HELL, get into writing! make your own, legally distinct magical world with your friends and enjoy yourself! Writing is great And if that sounds appealing, but too much work, Try out Dnd! TTRPGs have never, ever been more accesible, and 5e is super easy to pick up with the help of literally anyone who knows how it works, you can make your OWN magical story, where you do not even NEED to be the main character, you can perfectly play the role of a side character watching/helping the protagonists do their thing, while being equally as important if you so choose! the possibilities are endless! I have had to discard my childhood completely, I am transgender, and it was miserable...But you can do it, i believe in you! AND i do mean it, Harry potter's actor, Daniel Radcliff (Who is quite *rad*) whose entire thing was being known AS ¨guy who played harry potter¨ has manage to overcome that completely, and just does his own thing now! i love his acting even if im not a big movie gal. You can do it, you do not need your past, even if it may be a comfort, to be a worthwhile person today, to be happy. I feel like this is what people, angrily, think when they say ¨READ A NEW BOOK¨ but its veiled in so much exhaustion due to JK's horrible, horrible actions that...I feel like some people could do with this post! Anyways, have a nice day, i do mean it, thanks for reading this far.

Let me make this clear. If I see you reblogging Harry Potter, if I see you doing that "Hogwarts house" in bio bullshit, if I see you writing hp fanfic or whatever I assume you are a transphobe. "But it's my special interest!" Don't care. "But it's just fanfic!" Didn't ask. "But I'm trans!" You should know better.

Don't like it? Stop putting the works of the world's worst terf on your blog. I don't care if you pirate it, you're still giving the series continued relevance and you're publicly making yourself look unsafe for trans women to be around.

[lovecherishmm]

Kim Soleum could see ghosts and have his own guardian. Also, these ghosts happily followed him to Dark Exploration Record, and now they were playing buddies with Braun in his room.

What would have come to your mind at the mention of ghost? Scary, grotesque clump of flesh? The monster under your bed? The dangling, faceless figure with their head painfully close to yours once you open your eyes, dripping blood and smelled rotten?

Kim Soleum, for all his part, could attest it was rare for ghosts to appear so 'dirty'. It was also rare for them to actively try to drag the living into some sort of mess. And, they were quite sensitive, they did not adore impolite and imprudent people in their presence. They also do not like it when their appearance is described and made fun of, especially when their privacy of living days is exchanged with poorly hidden mockery and disrespect.

It was a valid and reasonable response, he learned. Kim Soleum came to realize it was a simple decency, one which the living now undermine as something to be frowned upon. The rule was unchanging, so long the living do not cross the line, they would also not cross theirs. Sometimes though, many ghosts were curious and stepped too closely to the living world, got stuck there and had to replenish their energy to be back. Ironically enough, the same case happened with humans, many people took the chance to test their unfound bravado and never to be seen again.

Kim Soleum saw two worlds for a long time. He lived in two different spaces simultaneously, he witnessed far too much in a lifetime, failing to fit in either side and having to constantly protect himself so he wouldn't die.

Oh. Yes. You could die from seeing ghosts. When you're 'the same kind' as him, your soul is easier to be plucked out, that's why you should not delve too 'deep' into something you, as a living, should not do. It was a headache to face as a child, he could not articulate how terrifying it was to see ghosts creeping on the ground and filling the space as their bodies stacked on top of one another when he took a train ride, he could not convey how many crying faces following the frowning adults, could not say he sees a lot of things. He could not say he could see the future either, the future of which how close humans around him are about to die. He could not say their faces were akin to a fading painting, colours blurred and turned white-black, could not say the kind grandma he bought nice chocolate cookies from was fated to die that day and he would wake up the next morning to see the coffin in the mourning house.

But there's something people like him had in common. They have their own guardian. Kim Soleum had, too. Sometimes it was guardians that had been passed down in each family's 'chosen', sometimes it was ghosts that decided to adopt and keep them safe after getting help with their 'will'.

Kim Soleum had a guardian called Mr. Shin. Mr. Shin did not have a head, massive in stature and had ten limbs. The kid him had been utterly horrified he 'crossed' the line and was trapped on the other side for a week. His other guardian, a jaguar with four jaws and human limbs as tails named Ji, found and dropped him in his backyard with his parents looking both relieved and haunted.

The 'ghost' world Kim Soleum had known for so long was terrifying, potentially dangerous and still also largely safe and kind. He could count on one hand how many ghosts tried to harm let alone kill him, even then it was on accident.

The Dark Exploration Record was anything but safe. It may be emptier outside (it feels so strange to see such emptiness), yet inside the ghost story, what he met were ghosts brimming with malice and bloodlust. He had expected it to some extent since it was based on what's written by humans for entertainment—he had some hope it wouldn't be this dangerous.

– Dear Friend! You've got such wonderful companions! This Braun is in awe of Mr. Shin's vast knowledge, a truly brilliant display of expertise could be a wonderful contribution to our show!

But it's okay, Kim Soleum tried to convince himself one more time, hands holding on Ji's heavy body to stop the latter from grooming Braun with her monstrous lick. Ji growls in dissatisfaction, tails easily grabbed him by the scruff of his neck. They just came back from a Darkness and need to be 'clean'.

– .... This little fellow surely misunderstood some things along the way.

As long as he still had his guardians with him, the Darkness was manageable. And for extra note, the apartment is too small to hold two massive ghosts bickering and gushing over Braun's minuscule and adorable form.

"...."

"Say hello, they live here now."

Thankfully, Baek Saheon was considerate and welcoming to share his room with Mr. Shin and Ji. Most people here could not see them, but the guy had intrigued the ghosts enough they were willing to show themselves.

– Do you want to kill him yet?

If he could stop Ji from killing (teasing) Baek Saheon for fun, it would be best. Lest the poor guy break down and flee.

[s-lverwing]

I’m so happy to read your Caracalla fanfics omg?? So yummy and good!!

I haven’t seen the movie yet (it’s been spoiled for me already tho- rip) and long message ahead yikes I’m sorry (not a request either!!)

Food for thought.. but I need to see Caracalla and a soft wife- (this is soooo anti his character) but I live for the ‘asshole to everyone.. except my WIFE’ trope and I feel like he would be like that to reader (because i said so lol)

Need to see soft spoken reader with loud, angry, dark, jealous, possessive Caracalla, I just need a man to be angrily in love with me at this point lmaoooo

Anyways pls share your thoughts if you’d like because I need to YAP about him- more people need to YAP about him !!

Hi!!! thank you for your kind words 💗 im glad youre happy to read what i wrote <3. and don’t worry about the yappin !! i LOVE to yap too. its a bit long the text so that why im adding a read more 😭😭😭

i dont think it would be too ooc for caracalla to have a soft wife. i think it actually can make so much sense when you think about how deeply fractured and emotionally starved he was. like in the movie he is violent, chaotic, and most likely consumed by his disease. but beneath all that, I KNOW he craves softness, someone who sees past his rage and bloodlust, someone who can offer him something what he’s never had: unconditional kindness (even if he doesn’t deserves it lmao)

i want to add that i can totally imagine him viewing her as a gift lmao, something the gods granted in a rare moment of mercy. which would make his possessive and obsessive behaviour worse. his “love” would be intense, protective, and dangerously devoted, but also strangely tender in a way only she gets to see.

i think caracalla’s jealousy would be volatile, loud, destructive, and entirely uncontrollable. like his possessiveness wouldn’t just came from a place of “love” but from a deep-seated fear of losing her. and if geta is involved, it would be even worse. like he wouldn’t have boundaries in his rage (lol does he ever has boundaries?). he even could hurt his wife, not out of intention ofc, but because he’s too far gone (like we see in the movie and the script with that geta scene).

BUT the second he realizes what he’s done, though, he’d be utterly shattered, falling apart in a way only she would EVER see. crying, begging, trembling—just very pathetic, in desperation. he’d fall to his knees without shame, pressing his face against her stomach or thighs, clinging to her like a drowning man. like almost panicking. words would come in a frantic, broken torrent with half apologies, half declarations of obsession. because he doesn’t know how to apologize, ofc.

i feel like he would know that his wife is both his greatest weakness and his only salvation.

sorry for the YAPPING snnfnckdkw i just love how pathetic he is after he lashes out 🥺

[solar4seekstron]

Before and So Forth Chapter One: Megatronus

TransformersOne!Megatronus x Cybertronian!GN!reader (Bit of Starscream x reader- kinda)

Solars Indie Series

Chapter Two, Chapter Three, Chapter Four, Chapter Five, Chapter Six, Chapter Seven, Chapter Eight

Introduction Indie Series

Content: 16+

Trigger warning: 16+???, Megatronus and Starscream want you, Sentinel eventually. Nonconsensual touching at first…I think that’s it 030

(This is going to be a long one. The story takes place before the events when Sentinel kills the primes and all th High Gaurd have to hide and plan to destroy sentinel. In this story because I enjoy tat sort of yandereish crap I wanted to make it x reader where everyone basically wants that reader cake lmfao. But not in an extreme way. There isn’t many females but I can add a few if so requested. I’m not sure about Solus Prime but I‘ll talk about that at the end. For now it’s mostly Megatronus, Starscream, Soundwave Shockwave, and Sentinel. I’d love to add more females I swear. My DM’s are a safe place if you wish to request any females. Or other males. I’ll do my best.

The plan is once it comes to the death of the Primes. (Weirdly excited to write how that’ll go) I’m going to give myself more work and write different path for the reader like if she doesn’t know what happened and Sentinel lies to them or the reader does know and hides with the high guard. Eventually with the sentinel timeline the reader ends up with Megatronus cause of course. It’s going to be a long one so please be patent….like with this chapter lol.

This chapter won’t have smut but it is spicy. Close to the end. If you don’t like don’t read this page and account is only for people who enjoy these to come to . Dont bully or harass anyone and leave.

Anyway my loves please enjoy and I shall release Chapter two next week. So every Tuesday :D)

Being a part of the High Guard who fought alongside and for the Primes.

Have always been something you felt pride but at the same time almost guilty for. As time in the years went by you began to wonder if you’re even a true part since there were so many others above and even better than you.

Such as Starscream, Shockwave, and Soundwave. You were a jet. Someone who seeks and plays as a scout most times.

You did the Quintessons hunt most of the time. Sort of gaining a reputation with the others even the ones who didn’t know you that well.

You were in some ways close to Megatronus Prime along with Starscream, Shockwave, and Soundwave. Megartronus like the other primes would have his own little group of the high guard.

All from his own picking and hopes to have them join him in his deception cause for the far future after the war was over.

Much like how the other primes have their own group of the high guard.

You always had a smile and softness in your voice. And yet you always showed time again and again of your strength.

Along with how you always executed your missions as you often enjoyed either sparring or training by yourself before and after. These brought you joy even as others didn’t understand. You also knew of sentinel but wasn’t that close to him.

You two know each other mostly on speaking terms and after the past cycles as you two continued to work for the primes. He always kept trying to get you to be his. Believing someone “easy” and so “strong” should stay by his side. And not with others who disrespect him.

A guard who uses swords that resides on your side and on your back. You were almost as tall as Starscream. Being a couple inches shorter.

Over time there was a sort of rumor going around. That Megatronus and Solus Prime were currently courting each other but were trying to keep it professional. You didn’t pay much mind to this as although you care for both deeply as they are who you follow.

That feeling of a sort of affection and even lust was something that you know should be buried and kept to yourself. You admired Megatronus as a leader besides Zeta Prime. Same thing to the trio but you never felt the same with sentinel.

At times you and other High Guards would train with Megatronus. Though you notice you were at every meeting and Megatronus seems to enjoy sparring with you most.

One morning as you walked from your recharge. You head to the training area believing you’ll see the other High Guard as you make your way. Once you entered you were greeted by the others as a few have already started training.

Starscream was standing watching the others train as he had a stern look on his voice. Once he noticed you his almost frown turned into a smile. he then greeted you with open arms

”Ah, Y/N glad you can join us. As always, I would appreciate it if you would come early.” You would chuckle and put your hands on your hips as you stand next to him

”Sorry Starscream, but I try to enjoy any amount of time to recharge I can get. My backstrut has been killing me lately.” Starscream would hum and sets his hand on your waist, pulling you a bit closer as his other one rests on his own hip.

”You and me both. All part of being in the high guard. But at least we have you instead of these slow seekers who just keep WASTING MY TIME!”

”Starscream when did we talk about?”

”That energon is meant to eat not to shove down someones-“

”The other thing!”

”Don’t bully other High Guard just cause they’re not as good as me..” He rolls his eyes

”Starscream!”

”To be nice! Ok ok must you scold me every time?” You nod and and put your hand on his shoulder. You two continue to watch the other do their training

After a few mega cycles over the direct private comm was Soundwave reaching you. You then excuse yourself as you walk out. Starscream already sparring 3 v 1 as he yells at them to do better. As you walked out answering within 3 seconds

“Soundwave?”

”Y/N. Needed at Megatronus training quarters.”

”Affirmative.” The call then ends and you make your way over to Megatronus training quarters.

He makes his way to the room. Soon seeing that you were alone. You look around as you look deeper and a begin to wonder where the Prime was.

As you were about to turn around the door you came through then opens showing Megatronus walking in. He stands to be very tall as he towers over you his hand resting on the door frame as he stared down at you. He then speaks, his voice deep and almost roaring as he finally spoke to you.

”More early then I expected. I only hope the others will start taking your lead.”

He finally passes you as you had bowed your head. Your arm and hand over your chest to show respect.

”My Prime-“

”Haven’t I told you, you mustn’t be so formal around me when we’re alone. I thought we were friends.” You two were sort of friends in secret. He respects you as a companion in battle. At least that’s how far you believe his affections is towards you.

”My apologies, Megatronus.” You look down your arm still over your chest. But Megatronus only glances at you as he then puts his spear down and does a few arm stretches. You stand there unsure of the others if they were to join anytime soon

”Remember what I taught you when thundercracker was able to hold you down after an hour long fight?”

”Don’t forget ones weak point around the arm?”

”Yes..I soon found after my last battle with those Quintissons basterds that the same is almost the same with them but it’s with those mouths. Pull at the outer armor hard enough.”

”Uh.. Sir?”

”I wish for you to try your best to defeat me Y/N.”

“So the others?”

”Won’t be joining us. You’ll be at a disadvantage with the large size of the creatures. You know this.” He walked up to you. Staring down at you.

You only stare up at him and just nod your head.

Looking away before backing up to put your swords down. You can feel Megatronus eyes on you. Once you turned around he was soon throwing a punch at you.

You were able to dodge it sort fo flying to the side and quickly grabbing his fast lifting up your body to use your legs to kick the side of his head. You can hear him frown as you then push yourself up on his arm and land on his back. Getting on your arms and pushing yourself far behind him as he turns and look at you in a fast motion.

When he charges at you, you only got on fours moving in a quick motion to left and right dodging his punches as he stands over you.

He was close to fully grabbing your waist. But using you body strength to move yourself. Grabbing his arm with both hands you turned youself upside down your legs landing on his arm.

Then jumping up high so you’re over him about to kick him over the head until he catches your leg.

”Had enough?” He asks his voice booming

”Not even close.” You respond as he then throws you into the ground. But you were fast on your arms and feet again.

Taking in the impact. Something you grew use to whenever you trained under him. A couple mega-cycles go by as you and he keep at it. He was able to throw in a few good punches into you as you did as well. Though he did put in a bit more blows but seems to always avoid your head

Then before you know it your shift for the evening to midnight was in one mega cycle. He had you pinned down by your chest as you tried to catch your breath. He was over you almost out of breath as well

”As always you’re the only one who can get as much of a punch in me as the other Primes. Maybe there’s a Prime in your spark….after all.” You two stay silent for a little while longer until you let out a small sigh

”I should…start heading for my lunch before my shift….Megtraonus..” he seemed almost disappointed. Though it was hard to tell with his mask. But you can see he narrrowed his eyes and leaned down

”Tell me….” He said in almost a whisper. His mask only inches away from your face as he glared

”Do you believe that silly rumor…Of me courting Solus.”

”It’s not my place to care and worry of such things-

“I’ve seen the way you looked at me Y/N. And that ridicules could not be more false…” He uses the hand that was on your chest to move to you face gently cupping the side of your face

”And yet you still said nothing. Do you truly fear me for being a Prime?” You shake you head

”No I-“

”Silence.” He put his thumb over your eyes. You put your hands on his arm only to hear him remove his mask. You then stop. He leaned his head down to be right next to yours as you then feel his breath on your neck

”Megatronus?-“ You’re startled as you feel his lips on your shoulder. You try your best not to move but also wondered if you can even stop him. He kisses your neck slowly making his way past your jaw to your lips. Before he touches you lips he stops for a moment

”Megatronu-“ He interrupts you. Kissing your lips finally as his other hand rests wrapping almost around your waist.

His thumb gently rubbing over your chest. You took note he was very gently givin his large size. Basically covering you with his body as he continues to press kisses on your lips.

You tried your best to not return the kiss but when he gently squeezed his hand around your waist you gave in leaning up closer to return the kiss. He smirks carrying out the kiss.

You the get a direct comm from Soundwave as you tried you best to gain your self control. Your hands gently squeezing his arm. The one that has his hand over your eyes. When you tried to turn your head and even back with the little space you have.

His hand over your eyes only stay firm to keep you in place. Your hands find their self on his chest. He stops lifting his head a little but only a few inches.

”Megatronus I must meet Soundwave. A-and this. We shouldn’t- I- I can’t-“

”You deny my affections, Y/N?“

”No Megatronus I-“

”Will you allow me to court you.”

”Sir-”

”Answer your Prime. If you so deny me..” You struggle with your words. His lips then touching yours once more. This even more passionate in a way. After a moment he pulls away using the hand that rested on your waist to put his mask back on

”Quite lovely. Waited over centuries to finally have you in my hands Y/N. Tell me do you regret our moment. Are the feelings to show daily not so how you feel? Do you not feel these “affections” towards Your Prime.” He removed his hand from ver you eyes as he helps you up.. Him now kneeling as he looked down at you

”…..I do..But it’s not my place to-“

“I shall see you on our next training. Oh and don’t forget.” One of his hands rested around your waist. Bringing you a bit closer

”This stays between us. Although in secret. I shall court you and make you one as a Prime. My word is Truth.”

You just stare up at him. You nod slowly and try to pull away a bit. But he kept his firm grip until he eventually lets go. Letting you go. You bow your head and make your way to retrieve your swords.

Once at the door you look at him. His back to you as only his head was side ways. Glancing at you. You bow your head once more then walk out the door closing behind you.

You then make your way to Soundwave your fists clenching as you scold and continue to overthink what just happened. he was right you loved it and wished for it before. But you wished for it with your other closest friends.

But you disciplined yourself for centuries and now that one of your friends, no your Prime Megatronus has made this move and revealing of his feelings towards you. You start to feel your heart racing. What are you to do if he does make you a prime.

What about your friends. Is he really this attracted to you or is he just using you because of his power. Could he just be doing this to any other High Guard. You stop for a moment knowing you’re alone and let out a breath

”He’ll get bored…..soon enough..” You continue to walk making your way to Soundwave. On 40 minutes (Not sure what the transformers word for minutes is sorry) until your next mission.

Yay first chapter! I swear my writing will get better. I definitely missed something or messed up somewhere. Hope y’all enjoyed it. There will be smut soon. Be patient my dears. NOW REQUESTS!!!!

I also take requests in my DMs. Have a good Morning/Afternoon/Night!

[coffeegnomee]

I'm not the most knowledgeable about season 4 so I would love your thoughts on all the comparisons to it , and also generally on zam's rapidly declining, slightly unstable mental health in the latest stream ( only if you watched it of course! )

This was about the stream "staring into the sun" and I finally finished it (not "crawling", so if anything changed I'm not liable)

So, first off, on a genuine level, I think we have, because of this stream, entered into new and entirely uncharted waters, something that will make season 6 and sunkissed into entirely and completely their own story that no longer has any relations to s4. So not knowing the past isn't a detriment.

Additionally, what actually happened in two years ago isn't relevant to what Zam remembers happening two years ago. And, on a very important note, what happened in season 5 is vitally important to not leave out when comparing s6 to s4. Jumper's betrayal has scarred Zam in ways far deeper than were ever present during the eclipse federation and BOTH seasons are going into what is going on in s6.

That being said I am more than happy to oblige :) I will always and forever yap about how much the past returns to haunt us.

Though THAT being said, I went to look up a Vitalasy quote and got light headed from how DRAMATICALLY terrible and awful and terrible zam and vi were at communication.

There was a sign room on 3/22/23 (vod archive is here) where the only way Zam felt like he could communicate his thoughts to Vi and Subz was by writing them down on signs and hollllyyy shit. That was so awkward I forgot how awkward that was. Zam could literally barely put two words together in defense of his thoughts, could only go "yeah" as Vi read the signs. And Vi literally had his thoughts written down in a book that he kept opening up and reading and highlighting to remind him of his points and would make small frustrated noises at how they were on the same page and yet also not on the same page. And also be unable to just say what he was feeling.

We are in an entirely, and I mean entirely different era of princezam. season 4 princezam could quite literally never bring derap back and tell him how he has hurt him in many words and with examples. The difference is mind boggling.

Ok so. this is going to be rambling because I dont have time to really think things through and there's a lot to cover. buckle up.

The quote I was trying to find, and didn't even really find, was Vi saying to his chat, alone, how zam leaving would be the worst thing to happen to eclipse federation. It's something I vivdly remember him saying and how much I flat out thought he was lying when I heard it the first time. How could Zam leaving or Eclipse breaking up be the worst thing when all it felt like was Vi was trying to control Zam. I didn't believe that Vi truly loved Zam and cared about having him around regardless of what the plot was.

But in the stream he had his book that he read out saying, “We have the gear, we have the hearts, we have the abilities, and we have each other” and throughout the conversation, re-highlights “we have each other” over and over. And once he was alone with chat he said, “I don't even want to build [the prison] without the team’s support”.

At that point in the 3/22 stream above, he was willing to drop the whole project over Zam and Subz being happy with it. And that'll do for my point.

Unluckily for him, between that stream and two days later when they had another meeting, Zam decided that he didn't want to be a burden for the team and would just willingly and excitingly go along with the plan to build a bedrock prison at spawn with the exploited bedrock. He jumped into a hole and killed himself to prove his commitment to the project. Vi also jumped in and also died. Oh my eclipse federation.

As recap if you have no idea what Eclipse is:

The Eclipse Federation started as a team with a goal to not be nice to the server that didn't care about them anymore. The server treated Subz like shit. He had been pacifist all season and kept getting dragged into conflict and killed, and Mapicc (and zam and spoke) blew up his base, and he was tired of being stepped on. So it was time to stand back up.

Vi joined Eclipse with a secret plan that only Subz knew (and ash and spoke) that had been planned since day 1 of the server: he had the wormhole. A game breaking exploit that got them creative mode items and eventually, (after zam betrayed, and only for spoke), op itself. But he wanted to reveal this slowly and excitedly to the server to create a sense of fun and mystery. And he also wanted to balance the server by having the exploits and only using them to defend those he cared about and to create a prison to deter others from trying to be tyrants. He didn't want to be the villain.

Zam joined Eclipse because Mapicc was hunting him down over and over and had just recently banned him off and revived him and left him on one heart. He had betrayed and left Mapicc (and ro) because they had duped thousands of items with a different exploit and Zam was totally done with anyone having an unfair advantage on this server. He burned the dupes and left the team.

Subz took him in when he had nothing, gave him gear and some of his own hearts, gave him a base, a home, and a team to protect him if Mapicc came back after him (and mapicc did. and they protected him).

Eclipse thrived as a team for over a month or so. Laughed and made bases, logged on at odd hours of the night to save Zam, showed up for him and were a great and supportive team. Nothing was wrong.

But that sense of safety would be cracked and then shattered over the coming months.

Bacon said it great at the start of this stream, and if you're new and reading this, honestly so much of what is relevant in comparison of the past is said by the members in the modern era.

But Bacon said that intention and action matter, and maybe action a bit more. Zam agreed and said that what still hurt was how Vi and Subz were good to him. And he wished he didn't kill Vi when he betrayed him, that he only did that because he wanted to twist the knife.

And importantly if you're paying attention at home, Zam is finally in a spot where he accepts that he would have left Eclipse either way. It's just how he left that haunts him.

What the "intention" and "action" were is where Eclipse became the most fucked shakespearean tragedy on levels far past what you could imagine. I'm always one to giggle about how s6 is like s4, but it is maybe 20% like s4. s4 was a fucking crazy ride. I highly recommend it.

Over the coming months, Vi would try and Not reveal to Zam too much about what was planned for the wormhole because he 1) didn't want to spoil it and 2) didn't want ANYONE to figure out how to do this exploit bc it would work on any server.

But also he would desperately, and consistently, and so very very terribly at doing it, was trying to keep Zam on the team... by lying to him.

This is where chat started bringing up s4 when Zam and Derap were talking in the base. Vitalasy lied about a lot of things to Zam, and they specifically had a "no more lies" conversation too.

And from Vitalasy's point of view, he was only holding things back for Zam's own good, to keep Zam happy, to make Zam feel included, to protect Zam from getting scared and running when there was nothing to be scared about.

He also wanted to tell Zam everything, but Zam had said if chat couldn't know, he didn't want to know, and that he trusted Vitalasy.

But Vi had so many moving parts to work with that he would say something like "we have a bedrock farm in the end" to, from his mind, appease chat and keep them off the trail, while also imagining that Zam would understand that there was no bedrock farm. And then he also forgot that he even said that to Zam at all because it was not meant to be taken as the truth.

(Or like Derap says he was the only one to fight against Subz, not because he was but because that's what it felt like to him. It wasn't meant to be taken fully literally, it was just what was important to say)

But Zam would find out it was a lie, and his trust would waver. He'd think about how Vitalasy was adamant he only look at the first 20 (iirc) pages of the wormhole plan and was unwilling to let him see more. In the moment Zam was okay with not getting more info because he trusted Vi implicitly, but Planet eventually saw the book and told Zam that there were only 20 pages and Vi was lying to him.

On that note, another similarity is Bacon talking with Zam. Him and Planet would have tons of conversations with Zam as Zam worked through trusting and then not trusting his team and getting more and more miserable. I made a poll a while back about whether or not they were the reason Zam left Eclipse or if he would have left them anyway and the poll came back a perfect 50/50.

Which is funny because chat in s4 was SO 50/50 on Zam staying or leaving Eclipse. And chat now is so 50/50 on if Derap is being manipulative or not. All that chatter is gonna get loud. And makes it quite reminiscent of s4 all by itself.

Now, now that everything is said and done with s4, it is very very clear that Vitalasy was NOT wanting to be the villain. He said it All the time, but the way that he said it made it Sound like he was straight out lying. He would give examples of the god powers he could do, and how he could be evil, and then immediately say, but I wont do that, i couldn't do that. i don't have the heart to do that.

At times he would look like someone brandishing a knife saying, I'm not going to kill you. That doesn't exactly fill anyone with confidence of not being stabbed.

And when players would ask him to put the exploits down he would say, what exploits? I'm not exploiting right now. While he was flying with potion particles wafting off his character. Somehow, in his mind, since the exploit was obtained in a specific way, one was only exploiting during the moments that they were obtaining the powers, and then after it was just vanilla minecraft bc most of it was potions (with all the positive or negative affects in the game), or it was a double-join glitch and once you set it up it wasn't your fault that you could fly.

And when you watch lifesteal, and specifically princezam, having the heart to commit atrocities is not part of the equation. Mapicc and Zam and Ro committed atrocity after atrocity as Team Awesome, despite Zam clearly having remorse and regrets about the evil he was doing. Despite Zam deciding that he didn't want to be evil and wanted to get rid of the exploits. Despite him leaving Team Awesome. None of those feelings made Zam Not commit those villainous acts.

So to turn around and have Vi insist over and over that he wouldn't use these exploits for real... it just sounded fake. Absurd.

Especially as the plot progressed and Zam betrayed and Vi started Actually Using the exploits constantly, and killed Planet a dozen times in the prison, and was flying around, and was breaking out of the prison when Spoke put him in. He kept using more and more exploits all the while insisting that he wasn't going to be the villain. It was the most fascinating train wreck to watch. And so painful. And so mind bogglingly flabbergasting for truly, and I mean truly, not knowing what was going on in Vitalasy's mind.

But in the end, as Bacon was saying, Vi gave up. As he kept talking to Bacon and Zam and Planet, over time Vi got more and more sad about being the villain, he hated being the villain, he felt misunderstood because he just wanted to use the exploits to protect those he cared about, and he missed princezam and was so SO sad (and mad) about Eclipse falling apart, and so he finally decided to give up all the exploits and burn them in front of the server.

The Server thought he was full of shit and had more exploits at his base and laughed him off the stage.

And Vi banned himself off the server that day. Gave up being the villain in the most permanent way he knew how. And the arc ground to a screeching halt.

...until Subz revived Vitalasy specifically to tour him around the server, reveal a new base, and then tell Vi to kill him. Ban himself off the server because Subz had gotten to a point of missing Zam and Vi and him being a team that he thought maybe, maybe, if he wasn't around they would come back together.

And Zam, well he thought of banning himself off the server too, but ultimately didn't decide to do it, not really but partially because Vi's revival and Subz' subsequent ban, it would have been Too Much to have a trifecta of suicide from one team. But they were literally all doing the same depression plot all on top of each other. It was so much tragedy oh my goodness.

but instead of banning himself, Zam joined Spoke for the wormhole, deciding that it would be best for the server and everyone if he just ended it as fast as possible so they could move on to season 5. (also Pangi bedrocked trapped him to change the trajectory of his life)

So the parallels that keep coming up are the looming doom that Vi/Derap are lying to him. That Zam is unable to tell what is the truth and who to trust.

And that's the terrible part, imo, of s6 and these parallels, and the reason I wanted to find that Vitalasy quote at the start.

You CAN, from a certain angle, when you boil out the wormhole, say that the Vitalasy Zam arc was Vitalasy desperately trying to stay teammates with PrinceZam by telling him anything he needed to hear to be okay with not betraying them.

And there is nothing Zam hates more than being lied to. Even exploits. In the end, before he betrayed, it was more about the fact that Vi lied to him about the bedrock farm and lied to him about changing the prison and lied to him about a bunch of other things, than it was about the exploits themselves. Though, finding a vault of Vi's exploits IS what sealed the bag for Zam betraying.

Which sounds incredibly similar to what Derap is doing.

Even Derap being so accommodating to talking to Zam about his concerns is so Vitalasy. And changing his plans based on Zam, but in a way that Zam doesn't quite trust, is so s4. I don't even know how to begin to describe the actual vi and zam relationship in s4, but this derap one is a fading parallel that is so so so close and also seemingly so so so far.

I do not think Derap is being manipulative on purpose, and esp after this stream I don't think he any sort of master plan like Vi had with the wormhole. And it was mostly the wormhole that drove Zam away from Vi.

But the wormhole was just the convenient glitter that allowed Zam to delve into a greater problem: his communication skills and his hatred of being lied to.

And when you take season 5 into consideration, where Jumper lied to him straight out for three months straight, Zam is now completely triggered by the smallest hint of a lie.

And Derap is manipulating the truth to make himself look good or drive a point home about Zam. He isn't lying to cover some big plan up.

This is where I'm like, this is not going to end like Eclipse at all. This is already so far past were Eclipse was it's crazy. Because Zam has learned how to articulate himself and stand up for himself. He's completely gun-shy about it, but he is learning how to do it and actually practicing the skills he needs to make it happen.

But, I made this comparison a couple of posts ago, with Derap specifically vod-watch stream sniping Zam (which Zam does not know about at all, so no snitches, also it's technically legal bc they're teammates), this pulls s6 back into the realm of s4. Zam Hates stream sniping just as much as he hates exploits. The game is set and we shall have to wait and see what comes of it.

But between vod watching his teammate to find out why he is not trusting him and having the prot 4 exploit, Derap was on thin ice for keeping secrets while manipulating the truth. Now that the prot 4 exploit is out in the open, it doesn't help much, but it does change things. I can only imagine what might happen if Derap keeps accidentally slipping up and mentioning chat messages he's not supposed to have seen.. like needing a PR team.

But without the big evil looking plan like Vi had, idk if the parallels are paralleling. Though Zam ending stream talking about is it even worth continuing is So s4. The constant back and forth and indecision was the hallmark for how Zam ended up being completely miserable in Eclipse by the end and the fertile ground to make him betray the second he found the full exploits.

But the more desperate Derap is to keep Zam on his team, the more Zam is going to panic at the smallest things.

Now, for Zam's deteriorating mental health... this isn't new in the slightest. If anything he is wildly more stable now than the past, as I've mentioned above. I don't really know how to phrase any of this because Zam from a mental health perspective is the largest can of worms you can open. There are so many layers and discoveries and learning and pain and woundedness.

He has a history of paranoia that started from the first moment he stepped onto this server, then he was hunted down in his base multiple times so trading with villagers gives him trauma for being jumped. He is constantly thinking about how he might be betrayed because he was betrayed several times before s5, and then in s5 he was almost completely broken by Jumper's betrayal and now everything triggers that trauma. He also was the betrayer many times and knows what it feels like to be the one hurting others and is anxious he will do it again or that others will do it to him. He's a people pleaser who cannot bear anyone being mad at him and will do whatever it takes to make it better. But he's also a recovering people pleaser and learning how to stand up for himself and his needs.

He doesn't even know what's wrong with himself, but as he said to Derap, Derap saying that makes him feel like there is something terribly wrong with himself. That he's a burden too heavy to bear. And that nobody wants him. The negative self talk is loud.

None of this is new. This is the princezam experience. He gets himself into these situations that make him face some aspect about himself that cuts far deeper than any lore would normally go. And after watching for 2 years it's incredible to see the growth.

And then there's the stone sword mentality. Which I don't necessarily put under mental health though it's adjacent.

You probably don't remember, but early on in s6 Zam had a late night, while making the flame volcano, where he told chat the origin of the stone sword mentality. (7/21/24, about 7:48:00)

His first every youtube video win, he had a public smp with his friends and everyone was xraying and hacking and when someone became the villain and killed Zam, he just set his bed and made stone swords and kept running in, over and over and over. And eventually he actually won. Running at the villain over and over worked.

In terms of lifesteal, stone sword comes from the day in s4 when he died to Mapicc and Ro while fighting for spawn. They went to his respawn and killed him 13 more times. And all throughout Zam was making stone swords trying to kill Ro, but Ro put him on two hearts and left him alone. Mapicc saying they're gods not demons.

But earlier than that, in the finale of s3, Zam made stone axes and ran at Spoke over and over while Spoke slowly farmed him off the sever. And Spoke banned him. Zam accepted the loss and learned that lifesteal is about killing, and gave up being the hero.

And in s5 Zam threw himself at Minute over and over. Usually with Mapicc, but one time in particular he set his bed in front of Minute and fought him until Minute killed him just to see what Minute would do when he respawned right there. This was just before the Joker arc truly started.

In the Joker arc, in the end, after trying for weeks to get Minute and Jumper to kill him, he finally got his wish and got 4v1ed and died almost instantly, banning himself off the server in gayjoker flare, cackling that he won.

Throwing himself at impossible odds and never giving up is princezam. Doing it even if it means death is princezam. The gross disregard for his own life is princezam.

He only looks at the underlying reasonings occasionally. How he runs from his problems by killing himself. Any time he doesn't know what to do, he solves it with a self-ban on someone's sword.

This was actually the very first time that he allowed the connection to be made that he wanted to suicide on Flame's sword and actually used that word.

But it's so heartbreaking to hear him talk about it with Derap.  ZAM: “it is dumb. Its self destructive, its stupid, its everything everyone says about me”

Over the years Zam has been called insane and stupid and been misunderstood and a lot of shitty things by the members. And he hears what they say, and he takes it on too. How can he not believe them when everyone says this about him.

But the stone sword goes so much deeper than a destructive defense mechanism. In so many ways it really strikes the core of who Zam is, how he views lifesteal and minecraft. A place where lives don't matter, where you can fight for what you believe in even if you have no hope.

Stone swording has helped him countless times. Being willing to die so easily has kept him safe in some ways, it makes the pvpers pause and be confused and not understand why he would do this. He does still die, but it makes them pause, and in that pause and in being able to grind back up to full gear so easily, it gives Zam the emotional upper hand in the face of power he could never defeat.

And, potentially, makes the pvper think differently about the server.

So much of the s5 Joker arc was about getting Minute and Jumper to understand that they need to kill people on the killing people sever, and Zam tried teaching them that by being a destructive menace that also set his bed in front of them and asked them to kill him over and over. He tested and pushed and prodded them into doing what this sever was made for. Making them loose the idealogical battle so Mapicc and The Players could win the pvp battle.

And even in this stream with Flame, there was none of the gayjoker flare or off-putting delightful giggles, but Zam was teaching Flame much the same lesson, in many of the same way. That he really doesn't have a plan and he can kill him. That he shouldn't be so paranoid about a trap.

All along the way teaching them something about lifesteal that cannot be taught any other way. Death is not important. Lives don't matter.

This is princezam. This is what he does.

And it's so interesting how an idealogical look on lifesteal and minecraft can so easily turn into a discussion about self destructive coping mechanisms.

And Zam wears his "I'm dumb, stupid, what the fuck is wrong with you" mental health as its own defense mechanism. He claims (or rejects) but still believes the shit people say to him which only furthers the idea that this ideology about minecraft IS fundamentally fucked up, that he is broken beyond repair. Which only serves to spiral the discussion rather than letting Zam just be Zam.

Because as he reminisced about the first stone sword incident on that public smp, he said how lifesteal feels like that server, like home.

But going back to how he learned lifesteal was about killing and gave up being the hero in s3, this was part of why Eclipse fell apart.

Vitalasy partially wanted Zam on the team because he wanted Zam to be their moral backbone and make sure they didn't go too far. Zam gave himself the duty of being "the anchor", and that position weighed on him so heavily. He hated being the voice of what they should or should not do, and in his heart he didn't want them to do exploits at all, but he felt bad that Vi had this plan all season and didn't want to be the reason it didn't happen.

But what Vitalasy didn't realize was just how morally different Zam had become.

It was Vi who spurred Zam on to be the hero at the end of s3, passing the mantle of keeping everyone revived onto Zam while Vi banned himself off for the season. And Zam embraced the mantle, fighting for the people of the server against Spoke and Clown who would rather see everyone banned.

But over the course of the finale, Spoke got nearly everyone to betray Zam at some point, leaking his base over and over, and eventually convinced Zam that this is lifesteal and the server must die.

This hugely marked Zam going into s4. He didn't want to be the main character, he didn't want to be the hero, and for the first time ever (iirc) he started talking about how on lifesteal there are no heroes and villains. He became morally grey.

And in his greyness he joined Team Awesome and committed the above atrocities.

But what Vitalasy didn't realize, not until it was too late, was that all this had happened to Zam, and he had been changed since he last saw him before the finale of s3. Vi was inactive most of s4 until Eclipse, only logging on at the start, killing people (like Mapicc and Ro) and and giving hearts to Mapicc and Ro, and then logging off. And Zam was not on s4 at that time, joining a couple months late. The two didn't speak a word to each other from the day of the s3 finale (actually it might've been before then) until they were both on Eclipse.

So when he asked Zam to be their moral backbone, he thought Zam was morally upright.

But Zam is both morally upright and morally corrupt. He will equally fight for the server and repair spawn and get rid of exploits just as much as he will use exploits and kill innocents and be a cold blooded killer.

And he doesn't know himself what is the right thing to do.

So to put him in the position of being the moral backbone, instead of being a good thing and what Zam was good at, was the actual worst place for him to be.

And I think a similar thing is happening with Derap. Derap doesn't realize how Zam has changed and been changed by the server. He's aware of the lore because he used to watch streams, but he hasn't really truly gotten it into himself (or maybe he's just not acting on it bc his character can't know any of this bc he's new) that Zam has been utterly changed by s4 and s5. He just thinks Zam needs to stick up for himself a bit and get over the past. But Zam is deeply, deeply affected by what happened. And that's going to cause conflict within the team.

In some ways Derap is just like Vitalasy, but in others he is totally and completely wholesome and the best thing that's ever happened to Zam on lifesteal (which you also could have said about Vitalasy at some points), a teammate that really wants to be with him through thick and thin and isn't afraid of any of the darkness.

It's exactly the kind of relationship that heals past wounds, makes you believe there is good in the world again, and that maybe you're lovable even if you're a mess.

But he doesn't understand the darkness, hasn't seen it, so how can he truly understand.

And that's exactly what we're going to be watching unfold in the coming month(s).

Thanks for coming to my tedtalk.

[yinora]

how do you think the spn boys ( Sam, Dean, Cas) would separately react to a reader who needs reading glasses. like it's boring long ass research time and reader just pulls out their glasses and the boys are like '??? when was this'. I just think it would be very cute 😭🫶

a/n: OMG YES!! i love this request sm <3 though personally i dont have reading glasses, i tried to make this accurate, i hope this is good T.T i hope you enjoy!!

pairing: Sam, Dean, Cas (seperately) x gn!reader

Dean Winchester

it was just another ghost case, a vengefull spirit that's pissed off, so ofcourse, you had to figure out who this ghost was, when they died and where the remains were burried.

you were in a small town, the ghost was killing people with what they feared, so far, there were three victims, one was a woman who was scared of heights, she got pushed off a building. the second was a man who was scared of tight spaces, he got suffocated in a closet, and lastly there was a young girl that was scared of deep water, and she drowned in the deep side of a pool, all over the span of a month.

Sam offered to go get you three some proper lunch from the local store, so you and Dean have to do most of the research, or atleast make a start on it.

Dean is making himself comfortable on one of the two motel beds, with Sam's laptop for research.

you sit down next to him, with a book on vengefull spirits, because you mentioned something about how this spirit could be a different kind than usual.

Dean glances at you for a second, a small smile on his lips, but quickly, his expression changes to one of absolute surprise as you whip out a pair of glasses and put it on, opening your book, though in the corner of your eye you can see him looking at you.

"what?" you raise an eyebrow.

"you have reading glasses?" Dean asks in a surprised tone.

"yeah, obviously" you glance at him.

"got a problem with that?" "what? no, no ofcourse not" he replies, though he has a teasing smile on his face, which makes you roll your eyes. yeah, he was so gonna use this against you for teasing.

Sam Winchester

its been over an hour since Dean said he was gonna go and check out the scene once more with Cas, and you and Sam are still sitting there in a motel room.

Sam has been researching for the past 45 minutes, on his laptop. you two are quiet, save for the occasional typing from Sam.

you made yourself a cup of tea, before sitting down at the small table in the room, pulling a book. you also pull out your reading glasses, putting them on and adjusting them slightly before flipping your book open.

Sam, being so engrossed on his laptop, doesn't notice for about 20 minutes, untill he looks up to ask if you've found anything, but the words die on his tongue as he looks at you, focused and reading... with glasses? since when?

"uh... did you find anything yet?" he ask with slight hesitation. he doesn't want to mention the sudden glasses, because what if you take offense? or get embarrassed? he doesn't want that, the least he wants is feel like an absolute idiot.

"no" you respond with a sigh, putting your book down and sliding off your glasses to be ontop of your head, grabbing your now room temperature tea, though you know Sam, and you can see in his eyes that he's confused about the glasses.

"i've had them for years, though they make researching on a laptop even shittier, and usually i borrow yours for research, so i don't put them on. besides, they don't do much for anything else, and i usually inspect the items we find at a scene, so, don't feel bad you didn't notice them before" you explain, smiling a little to yourself when he lets out a silent, relieved sigh.

"okay, okay, so i'm not a terrible boyfriend for not knowing you had reading glasses, good to know" he says with a slight laugh at the end of his sentence.

"you look cute in them, they suit you"

Castiel

Dean and Sam left to get dinner, leaving you in the motel room alone to research some more, because why not.

you were peacefully reading some newspapers, checking for any details you might've missed. the glasses you were wearing sliding down every once in a while, so you adjust them to sit back up on your nose properly.

you suddenly hear the sound of wings fluttering, and low and behold, Cas is standing across from you, though instead of the usual greeting, you're met with silence as you two look at eachother, the angel tilting his head to the side as he usually does when he's curious about something.

"....hello [name]..." he finally says, his eyebrows furrowing subtly.

"i didn't know you needed reading glasses." he mentions rather bluntly, making you smile.

"yeah, i know. you haven't been around much lately during research" you see him furrow his brows even more.

"i... think i should've known." he mumbles.

"isn't it normal for someone to know those things about their partner?" he asks you.

"yeah, but its not a big deal if you simply haven't noticed, its just a pair of glasses i barely use, its nothing to feel bad about" you say reassuringly.

[tastesousweet]

⭒ the girl with the tattoo (ii) - pt 1 here!!

matt sturniolo x fem!oc / reader

summary : matt is still a grumpy ass but y/n can't seem to get him off of her mind.

warnings : idk uhhh matt’s rude but in a love hate kinda way 😋! also alcohol/drinking (i headcannon everyone 21+!)

mickey speaks : shes finally hereeeee and shes kinda long. im hoping to post more consistently!! luv u guys enjoy <3 ignore the fact that the pic above has a yt girl in it this story is for everyone i promise !!!! i just liked the little green vibe ok? ok.

THIS IS PART TWO GO READ PART ONE FIRST DUH!!!!

AND of course you see matt again.

only a month ago, you were introduced and forced to spend an hour of your time in close proximity to him, no matter his disinterest. yet, also, only a month ago, were you gifted with the cutest tiny tattoo that continues to surprise you a little whenever you lift your shirt before a warm shower.

it hasn’t bothered you nearly as much as you'd assumed - only disrupting your life with the caution you now take to avoid irritating the skin at your lower stomach. though some nights you grow lazy, you’ve maintained a very disciplined attitude of incorporating time in your morning and nightly rituals to ensure the tiny hello kitty inked on you is properly cared for.

contrary, your interactions with matt bothered you far more than you assumed. your sub-concious must've held onto your attempts to break past his careless attitude (that greatly opposed your own people-pleasing nature) just to pettily haunt you. but you've you forced yourself to get over it at this point. you just had to after one night, the week following your tattoo appointment (and after a long day of rude professors and pretentious customers blaming you for their own mistakes), you broke down to andrea:

you sniffle before your voice breaks again, "everyone's just mean. and- and i was so fucking annoying last saturday. it keeps playing over in my head. i'm so embarrassed and i just know he hated me, but i dont know why?! i thought i was nice enough. he could've just smiled or maybe just- i-"

andrea pauses from petting your head, "honey, you're not still talking about the guy who tatted you, right?" you look up at her from your head's soft spot in her lap with glossy eyes and a quivering lip.

"dre-" you choke.

"oh my god! no! y/n, you can't take shit like that personal. not everyone enjoys talking or happiness for that matter, you can't hold on to something like that. i promise he's not too hung up on it himself." she wipes away one of your pitiful tears.

and here he is, standing across the room from you at a party.

you definitely did not expect to see matt (who’s mild attitude was clearly fueled by socializing) in this scene but you guess that la parties are just like that. as long as you know someone who knows someone you’re easily in, that's how you tend to get into these events at least. though an insta stalk would tell you matt has enough clout to get himself in, he and his brothers have built quite the brand for themselves among la socialites.

once your eyes spot him over the shoulder of some guy who just introduced himself to you, they can’t seem to move. you watch as matt smiles for a photo with a few others. matt. smiles. okay, so maybe it was a you problem. he doesn’t hate everyone maybe just you.

though, your thoughts are denied as quickly as his face drops. he doesn’t even care to look at how the image may have turned out like the rest of the group. instead, his eyes opt to watching the people around him as he sips his weak drink.

great, now you’ve become the weirdo watching him watch other people.

until his eyes catch your cautious yet curious stare from across the room. your cheeks heat and you’re immediately shifting your eyes back to the man in front of you.

matt almost smirks at his luck. no fucking way the scared sweetheart he’d tattooed just a few weeks ago is here. he looks away when someone lays a hand on his shoulder to bring him back into the conversation. you're surprised that he continues to look back over to you after adding his input.

the guy finally acknowledges your disengagement with the story about his new motorcycle and turns to see what exactly you’re staring at. he sees matt and turns back to you, “you know him?”

“yeah. well not like know-know we only met once, he gave me a tattoo.”

“oh, cool,” he looks back over to matt and turns back to you once again, “is he bothering you?”

your face scrunches initially, “no, it’s fine.” you smile at him, not wanting to give him the impression that matt did anything but exist (which apparently is enough to capture your attention).

“good. wanna go grab another drink and tell me more about this tattoo?” a charming smile morphs on face and you nod your head easily, taking his hand and leading him towards the bar outside of this large home. and away from matt.

“two-” you look over to the man beside you, “wait is this an open bar?” you ask him genuinely and he laughs a little at your aloofness.

“yeah,” he nods.

“perfect, we’ll take two kamikaze shots pretty please!” you smile at the bartender who seems to be enjoying her night quite a bit and squeeze his hand when you realize it’s still in your own. he looks down at your attached hands then back to you.

you turn your body to face him more directly and lean up to his ear, cupping your hand and whispering, “i’m so sorry, i think i forgot your name.” you were starting to feel bad and just had to confess.

you lean back and bite your lip to hide an awkward smile, and he somehow smiles harder than he already was, “it’s-”

“ashton!” you hear a voice yell hurriedly and now some dark haired guy is pulling him away from you and repeatedly saying “code red!” in his face. and suddenly, without any indication he’d enjoyed your short lived time together, he’s gone.

you try not to sulk but he was an attractive guy with easy conversation, so you at least hoped to get his number by the end of the night.

instead, you’re left leaning against the bar hoping those shots come around soon. you decide to update your friends on your night:

Y/N

cute guy lefttttt :(

REMI

noooooo he was so cute 😫

Y/N

don’t remind me

ANDREA

where r you now???

Y/N

outside bar, im waiting on shots

Y/N

come find me💔💔

your head shoots up from your phone when three guys practically ram themselves into the bar near you, a few people around them laughing obnoxiously.

"god damnit, chris! we said we were going slowly!"

"shhhh. you are so loud, matt!"

“excuse me, can we get some water? none of the sparkles or bubbles and shit, just water, please.”

“next time i'm speaking for myself! what if i wanted the bubbles?”

you lean your head a little to get a full view of the three recognizable faces. chris, with his arms dangled over his two brothers’ shoulders clearly obliterated and slurring his words (but excited to be there nonetheless). a blonde one, you haven’t gotten the chance to meet yet, with two nose piercings and a commanding voice. and matt, with his signature pout, even poutier now that chris’ weight is causing him to hunch over slightly. you guess you were bound to run into them.

you wonder if andrea was right in saying matt hadn���t held onto your exchange. you wonder if when he saw you earlier he remembered you for your friendly smile rather than your annoying nagging. or did he even remember you at all? did he only look at you because you were staring him down first? okay, where the fuck are those shots?!

“no way!" you hear chris’ voice screech upon recognizing you from across the bar, "y/n!?”

you look over and see him shockingly excited to see your face again. you smile in an attempt to not allow your nerves about matt get to you. you are never one to deny a conversation after all.

“oh my god! hi!” you reply as chris unwraps himself from his brothers and moves closer to you.

“how’s your tat treatin’ you?” his eyes express so much excitement he reminds you of a little kid. you’re very flattered to see someone feel so much emotion due to your mere presence.

“oh, it’s still so cute, no regrets so far. i love it.” you smile and he nods while you’re speaking.

he turns around and sees his brothers and a few friends remaining in the other side of the bar talking amongst themselves. “yo, get the fuck over here! why are you guys so far?” he encourages them with a hand wave.

you wave as well, trying not to be a total stranger- even if you are.

the blonde guy leads them over and hands chris a glass of water that must’ve been waiting on him.

“cheers,” chris smirks and takes a sip before a disgusted look takes over his face, “gross. my god! why do they make this shit so bland?”

the blonde boy rolls his eyes in amusement, mumbling, "just drink it," before approaching you kindly. "hey, i’m nick by the way."

“y/n, nice to meet you! i met chris and matt when i got my tattoo done at your shop a while ago.” you explain kindly.

before nick can get another word in a female voice is squealing, “you’re y/n?! hi, i’m asha, i don't know if your remember but we talked on the phone that one time!” a tanned girl with soft cheeks and dark loose curls moves herself in front of the boys.

“of course i remember, how could i forget that insane frog story? it's so nice seeing you in person finally!” you gush.

suddenly chris is beaming, “aww wait guys this is so cute! i’m feeling like we should all hug!” he nods to his brothers who are quick to shake their heads no.

“i don’t think..” nick starts.

“nooo! let’s hug!” chris argues and opens his arms wide gesturing for everyone to hug him.

౨ৎ

after sharing a very drunk and messy group hug you all continue to talk until chris finally blurts, "i gotta go pee so bad guys, " he laughs, "but i need people with me because if i walk in on someone puking, then what? i'll die from my severe" (its not severe at all) "emetophobia and no one will ever know?"

you and asha (who you've found is actually so similar to you) both laugh at his crisis.

matt just breathes a laugh.

"chris, there’s no reason to go further with the fear factor when no one said they wouldn't come with you. i’m coming, so you're not gonna die, let's go." nick shakes his head.

“you don’t understand, nick i would be dead and covered in- i can’t even say it, dude,” chris’ voice fades as they walk away.

"wait, i'll walk with you guys inside! 'm... getting cold out here!" asha suddenly says removing herself from your side and waving goodbye with a drunk smile.

"it's not cold at all, she's trippin'" matt speaks watching her run and practically jump onto nick, causing the three laugh while leaving the crowded yard.

you just shrug and lean onto the bar again, making eye contact with the bartender who looks as if she only just remembered your existence but also seems to mentally question where the other guy went and how you managed to replace him that quickly.

"are you always so nice about everything?" matt questions, leaning his forearms on the bar, still looking at you.

"what?" you look over to him now, feeling almost sick at his proximity.

he mocks you with a high tone in his voice, "'it's soooo nice to meet you! it's soooo nice seeing you!' it sounds exhausting, to be honest."

"didn't realize having manners got you jail time," you breathe.

"and i never said it did."

"well, i don't have to be nice to you if it bothers you so much," you shrug.

"aw, sunshine, you'd do that for me? you're too sweet." he almost laughs at his own sarcastic comment.

you lick your bottom lip out of habit, "why are you still here? don't you have friends you should be ignoring?" you hope he can't tell just how frustrated he's making you.

“you must think you know me.”

“i know you don’t like me.”

“wrong, again.” he smiles and points his finger at you.

“oh, you just don’t like anyone then?”

he glances away before responding, “what's the fun in telling you?”

you huff in defeat, wanting nothing more than those shots right now. though your subconcious hopes the bartender continues to prioritize her flirting customers over you just so you can continue this addicting back and forth with matt.

"you know, that’s the thing with people like you. you think everyone owes you everything." he shakes his head.

"people like me?” you scoff under your breath, “matt, why are you still here?"

he can pick out the offense in your tone, "oh shit, that was true? i was fucking with you, sunny!"

"you don't know anything about me," you laugh and shake your head.

"alright there are those kamikaze shots for you! so sorry about that major delay, honey!" the bartender sets the shots in front of the both of you and smiles at you apologetically.

"don't worry about it, thank you!" you hand her a spare five dollar bill from your back pocket.

when she's gone you finally notice matt's widened eyes.

"what's up with your face, now?"

"you gave her a tip for pouring you some rankydank, fuckin' low level shots after you've waited long enough for her to apologize?" he seems genuinely shocked.

"she only makes money off of tips," you roll your eyes, picking the shot up and gesturing towards the second shot for him to take.

"that's all you," he raises his hands towards his chest.

"oh my god, do it, matt."

he shakes his head and points to you, "you take your shot, sweetheart."

"i knew you wouldn't, pussy," you say under your breath before smirking as you down the alcohol you've been craving since you first saw his face.

upon your insult matt is immediately taking the shot along side you. and just as both of your faces adjust to the taste, matt's phone begins to vibrate.

he grabs it and you attempt to hide your own curiosity by asking the bartender for a lime to suck on (not daring to ask for alcohol again because you simply don't want to be hung up at this bar for any longer).

"yeah, yeah still here," matt plays with his bottom lip and looks down at you with your mouth full of lime. he thinks you look pretty adorable, especially under the blush pink fairy lights hanging above the bar. "'kay, i'll be quick. alright, nick. i will. bye."

he puts his phone away and wipes his mouth, "that shit was fucking vile, by the way."

"okay, drama queen."

"mhm," his face falters back into his usual pout, "well i gotta go, but, um, nick wanted me to invite you to this get together thing we host at the warehouse, it's in like a month but, you know, come if you want." he shrugs.

"tell him of course i will, but only because he asked." you smile sarcastically.

౨ৎ

ANDREA - 12:39 AM

y/n where are you we are both so confused rn help

ANDREA - 12:45 AM

hellooo????

ANDREA - 12:47 AM

GIRL WE'RE OUTSIDE AND WE DONT SEE YOU TF

Y/N - 1:06 AM

WHERE ARE U GUYS RN I JSUT SAW TATTOO GUY AGASSN IM LOSUNG MY MIND JUST A LUTTLE BIT

Y/N - 1:06 AM

I WAS AT THE OTHER OITSIDE BAR IN THE FRONT(?) YARD!!!!! but its ok im gonba find u guys

౨ৎ

a few days later matt comes across your instagram story, forgetting he had followed you in the first place. it was a picture of you and your friends from the same night he had seen you again. it's a simple mirror photo where you're all smiling but besides your soft skin and cute outfit, matt's attention focuses on frank ocean's pyramids playing over the story.

you see the notification later that day when you finally get time on your phone:

matthew.sturniolo liked your story

꩜⋆ ˚｡⋆🎱˚

[luminique]

Lighter praising (or showing affection) and telling reader that he’s veryy proud of reader who has daddy issues (aka me) </3 (make it a bitt angsty bcs yes)

with that voice of his…. oh i’m not sure if he knows his power. also i am SO SORRY if i messed this one up because i’m bad at writing T_T also this reads weird if i dont clarify that its an established relationship between lighter x reader

not everyone has a good relationship with their family. especially after the fall of the Old Capital, many had lost their family and caused a rift between their still alive relatives. your day to day life hadn’t changed much but it was difficult for your family to get accustomed to the new life.

with that came many challenges; your parents working more to sustain themselves, their expectations for you as their child to pursue higher aspirations. the outer ring wasn’t where they wanted you to stay for the rest of your life, new eridu is a much better option for your future. days go by, stress piling up, nightly arguments at the dining table about how you should spend less time with the sons of calydon.

you never really brought it up to the other members. you knew they’d comfort you, considering they all had troubles in their past, but it’s not like you want to bring down the mood all of a sudden. on one particular night though, you had noticed lighter sneaking away from the rest of the group. you thought you could follow him but he was a lot more alert than that.

“wanna get some air for a bit? the girls are still talking so its all good.” lighter handed you a lollipop as he began to unwrap one for himself. there was an empty area far enough from everyone that had a perfect view of the night sky. no clouds in sight, just the twinkling stars and the bright full moon. lighter sat down first, sweeping away any dust before patting the space next to him. as you sat down, you began to ponder about your life. you hung out less and less with the sons of calydon since your parents, more specifically your father, wanted you to work harder. even if you had brought home some extra tips from cheesetopia, or helped out around blazewood, it seemed as though your efforts weren’t being appreciated and instead all he had to say were insults.

in the corner of his eye, lighter noticed you staring off into the far distance. he scooched over a little closer to you, maybe he’d be able to see what you were seeing. “something caught your eye?” his deep voice cut through your train of thought, making you blink at him in confusion. “oh uh… just thinking.” you mumbled, finally unwrapping your lollipop and popping it into your mouth.

“something happened recently, right? you leave earlier than usual lately.” you forget how perceptive lighter was, always noticing before others. “not recent but…” you ran your hand through your hair, feeling frustrated at how you couldn’t even enjoy such a quiet and beautiful night. after a moment of silence, you finally spoke up.

“it’s just, my dad. you know how it is out here in the outer ring. they want me to move out to new eridu but i can’t just leave. i have you and- and the girls…. they just want so much from me…” your voice trembled as you let your emotions flow out of you. your bottled up feelings finally overflowing as tears began to well up in your eyes. in between the soft cries, you felt lighter’s hand on your shoulder, rubbing you to help you let it all out.

“don’t let that old man tell you what to do. you’re doing a lot already. everyone in blazewood can tell you the same,” he spoke quietly but noticed how you seemed to still be trapped in your own thoughts. he placed both hands on your shoulders and turned you towards him. “hey, hey. listen to me. you’re wonderful and we all appreciate what you do around here. your dad knows nothing about you. we know you, i know you, and i’m proud of all that you’ve done.” lighter’s voice turned more serious, yet still carried a hint of softness to it.

he removed his sunglasses, exhaling as he looked down at you. “home is where the heart is. right now, where is your heart? hmm?” he asked quietly, moving his hands down to cup yours. “here. blazewood. i want to stay with all of you.” your sniffling was shattering his heart, trying to cheer you up but also afraid of saying the wrong things. he brought up one of his hands to the side of your face, gently wiping away your tears.

“then stay with us. i’ll talk to him, alright? just between us, i won’t tell the rest.” his voice was warm, similar to that of a fire on a cold night. he pulled you closer into his arms, hushing you while reassuring you. lines of “it’s alright” and “i’m here” came out of him naturally as you gripped onto his jacket. a moment of vulnerability, a moment of sadness, a moment away from keeping up appearances. you didn’t have to pretend, you couldn’t pretend anymore and lighter could see that. soft pats, gentle kisses on the top of your head, he just wanted to make you feel safe and loved after having your feelings constantly dismissed.

[kurishiri]

Hii thank you so much for all the translations you’ve done!

I wanted to ask how would you describe Darius personally? I’m so interested in him as a character but the lack of information makes it hard to figure out anything about him ;; I don’t think we have any hints about his past so far? Unless I’m mistaken

helloow anon! ty for reading my tls too 🤍 i'll try to describe darius in the way i can- but theres overall not much known at all ab him yet either in the game so also take my words with grain of salt hehr

about darius and his possible past (its an attempt guys) ↓

hmm on the surface or at first glance, he kind of has a childish air to him to me. and i think hes naturally tht way .. as in i dont think he acts ths way in an attempt to actively hide smth else ab him, but also i think it serves to sort of underplay(?) just how scheming or wily he can actually be. he could also say the most “wtf” things with a smile on his face or with a calm voice ,, if you read the 2nd anniversary collection story (darius’ line to ring; iykyk) and darius’ story bonus with his “joke” to kate, you could probably feel ths.

i think theres also smth ,, sort of emotionally removed abt darius. he sort of views himself as an angel and whtnot and sees those who r cursed as superior to those who r not. i think there is ths sort of clash between his “inhumane” side where he shows an amicable smile but it doesnt reach his eyes and he struggles to empathize with others, and his also deeply human side.

after all, for all his hate toward “humans” like kate, he seems to show a rather strong attachment to her as well. all tht to say: he feels emotions like anyone else, and he feels them strongly (probably influenced in part by kate) — bc whether he likes it or not, he, too, is a human who happens to be cursed — and he does feel emotions such as jealousy, hurt, frustration .. but he doesnt know wht those emotions would be called. he cant put a label to his own emotions bc hes somehow convinced himself? tht such emotions r like beyond him and all tht jazz.

really, darius to me is sort of a case of a lot of “hes ths, but also tht” and all. a walking contradiction, in part due to his own philosophies and maybe trauma?

vros got negative emotional intelligence lmao

implications of his past

there r some subtle hints ab his past, actually! none of thm r super out there so its hard to catch and does require some like inference and theorizing, but i think we have like a couple parts we can sort of go off of here :>

for example, food. the favorite subject of his stories lmao its implied he may have dealt with attempts at poisoning him with food before or some other food-related trauma in the past. he is a noble, so it probably makes some sense if ths is a case, though it would leave the question of why him?

for one, he has mentioned he hates potatoes bc he ate so much of thm in the past tht he is like tired of thm and cant stand even the sight of thm. i forget which story he mentions the first part (it mightve been the wicked romance story event one), but he mentions the latter part in his 2nd anniversary story — the one you get by sending 400 times to him haha.

there r also moments (will vs darius story event and his dining bond story for example, among others) where he will find a way to like .. not have to be the one eating first. for example whn will gets him food, darius sort of indirectly makes sure tht will eats first before he eats himself. or it could be the same with kate. hes pretty subtle abt ths though — like he will never phrase it in a way tht makes it seem like food could be a potential weakness for him, but i think its sort of like a thing in his stories sometimes.

in the bond story where he shares a “secret” with you, its likely he was talking ab a moment in his past — specifically the part where he may have met nica and ring — though he phrased ths like a story to kate. but i think the fact they did ths in ths specific bond story, titled secret talk, gives it more possibility tht ths “story” is a real anecdote, yk?

and in tht same story, he tells another short anecdote abt nica and ring, saying how they really r a family. theres also the fact he is trying to create a family himself too ,, it kinda makes me think he may have had some familial issues? plus, there is his level 23 bond story where he basically says tht he liked how kate didnt try to leave him whn he is lonely or alone, smth like tht. perhaps he had some form of abandonment issue in the past?

well ,, these r all theories in the end! but maybe its smth to go off of hehr

[thenonbinarydetective]

Do you like the official wayne family adventures? It has everything any batfam fan would want.....But sometimes I feel like they all kinda have the same personality.....shouldn't dick be with titans or starfire....why is he back with Bruce?

EDIT: REMINDER THIS IS MY OPINION. IT IS NOT A DISCUSSION OR ARGUMENT.

It’s what tumblr fanon fans who actively go out of their way to shit on comics wants. To be precise. I’ve been shitting on the behavior of some truly awful people on here for like several years so if anyone reading this is surprised and offended. I don’t care.

No I really don’t like it. The better personalities are the girls really. But even then it’s not great. The boys and Bruce especially are full copy and paste. But honestly that’s the only way they can get what they want to work without digging too deep

That’s kinda the main problem I have with it and many others who do that it’s very surface level fluff rather than actually challenging the “angst” in the comics. I’m only putting it in quotes because to some angst is when it isn’t sunshine and rainbows all the time.

I don’t think it has a good argument, for lack of a better word (still works I just want a different one that I can’t remember rn) for being what it is. And also creating that weirdly rancid, occasionally violent and pretentious fanbase that accuses comic fans of doing that no matter what they say or do. Like some people suck but you dont need essays when people point out flaws in WFA. Of which it has some pretty obvious ones. Aside from batfam characterization their Talia characterization just rubs me the wrong way. Like I know it’s been worse but it’s just not giving what it should.

I think dickbabs is supposed to be canon there or at least people act like it. Idk a lot of their reactions can still read platonic which is why WFA readers try to say it’s batcest. If that answers your starfire question. Technically this should be set at a time where dick wasn’t fully friends with the titans again. Although it’s an au, they could probably just fix that for their obscenely happy go lucky attitude

But if you’re asking why starfire and Roy should be far away from the outlaws title, you’d be right. You can call me dramatic but it was lowkey shitty of them to include them considering the damage it did to their characters. Especially Kory.

Yeah dick should be actually independent. But again it’s family fluff over solid characterization so the umbilical cord isn’t cut yet

It’s negatively effecting comics too. Pushing that coffee Tim bullshit, “feral” Damian, and emotional support dick. The Damian one pisses me off most of all because they really had him pull a knife in a formal affair out of annoyance when that boy was raised an AL GHUL until he went to Bruce. Like if he’s drawing a knife it’s for a formalized duel. Not on an unwitting old woman. But even then I’m not sure I’m forgiving.

Oh and DUKE. Duke gets his own paragraph. Jesus fucking Christ did they do him dirty. Absolute boring cardboard cut out of a child. That also gets mildly sidelined for a comic that began with his narration. I get it’s a group thing but like why did some chapters seem to forget about him completely when they stripped him of every ounce of personality to turn him into a reader insert? God I hate it

There’s a lot of problems with it but apparently when you talk about it you’re in for a “let people enjoy things” lecture from someone who doesn’t actually let people enjoy things. I mean some WFA stans cry webtoon if you talk about the slightest amount of negativity. Claiming they need to be healed. Idk with what because WFA is basically a placebo of a comic

[nataliesfirefly]

You and I Walk a Fragile Line - Farleigh Start x F!Reader - Part 4

a/n: hey everyone! i know it's been a while but the next part is finally here! not sure how many parts i want this to be bc i dont want to fill up the tag, still waiting to make an ao3 account haha- but anyways im getting a taglist started just of people who have shown interest in this series, if i put you on it and you don't want to be on it just let me know. and ofc if u want to be on it lmk! i also made a playlist if anyone wants to check that out :))

playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/60Kll9HCoQru14J18bT21C

series masterlist

word count: 3.9k

warnings: language, suggestive stuff?, alcohol, smoking, emetophobia

Things are extremely awkward with Felix. He’s too nice to kick you out of Saltburn, yet he’s too prideful to apologize, so you two are stuck dancing around each other with small talk and short interactions.

Things with Farleigh, on the other hand, are surprisingly good. You never would have expected how close you two became in the past few days. In fact, you can’t remember the last time he insulted you, at least not in a playful way. You must have bonded over your shared dislike for Felix at the moment.

But for some reason, you worry if you get too close, he might push you away.

Tonight was dinner with all of Sir James’s friends, and as the Cattons tend to call them, the Henry’s. The actual dinner was full of awkward conversations with people much older than you about the future of your life and what you were going to do after graduating college. You actually had no idea what your plan was or what you wanted to do with your life. You used to push all the questions away and blamed it on the fact that graduation was pretty far away. It only recently dawned on you that you would be graduating in about two years. 

After dinner, you sit in the dimly lit living room with Farleigh on the couch as everyone else participates in karaoke. You and Farleigh snicker at some of the guests’ performances, whispering things to each other as if you are judges of some competition.

Eventually, Farleigh sighs and stands to his feet. “I’m going to go smoke,” He tells you, putting his hands in his pockets. He turns and looks at you expectantly. You take it as his way of asking you to come with him, so you stand up and snatch the bottle of wine you were drinking off the coffee table.

You follow him up the stairs, down the long, dark hall and eventually into his bedroom. He shuts the door behind you and draws out the pack of cigarettes from his pocket and lights one. “At least open the window,” You walk over to the window and open it to let the smoke out.

“Oh, right. Cause you hate the smell so much.” He rolls his eyes at you as he exhales some smoke. “Weren’t you the one that asked me for one of these the other day?” He points the cigarette at you and you glance down shamefully.

“Yeah. I wasn’t at my best, okay?” You shake your head and slump down to the floor, leaning against the wall and stretching your legs out.

“Okay, sure, miss goody two shoes.” He chuckles and sits down next to you. You take a swig from the wine bottle and sigh, leaning your head back.

“So, Felix…” Farleigh trails off and looks over to you. You continue staring up at the ceiling. “Can we not talk about Felix right now,” You reply, closing your eyes. “We need to,” He says, nudging you.

“What is there to talk about?” You ask, turning to meet Farleigh’s gaze. He presses the cigarette to his lips and inhales. “You said it yourself, that he only hangs out with me out of pity.” 

As he breathes out, the smoke passes over your face but you don’t care. “And what’s your problem with him? It seems like you’ve been waiting for someone to turn on him so you could join in,” You continue, and his eyes tell you that you’ve just read him like a book.

He quickly recovers and remains expressionless. “You’re projecting,” Farleigh responds. “Then why have you been so nice to me?” You ask.

The room goes silent and you are stuck in a moment where time doesn’t pass, it’s just you and Farleigh. His usual cold and dark gaze is replaced by something softer, warmer. Something in the air shifts and you can feel some kind of tension rising.

But then he looks away, breaking eye contact. “Because Felix is just stupid sometimes,” He finally replies, nodding toward the bottle of wine you are holding. You hand it to him and your fingers brush against his.

He takes a drink. “I don’t think he ever had bad intentions. He’s just an idiot,” You consider this. Maybe he’s just extremely out of touch with reality like the rest of the Cattons.

There’s a pause as you think of something to change the subject to.

“So… How about that Sadie girl?” You ask, turning to him with a grin. He gives the wine back to you and you take a quick swig.

Elspeth is, for some reason, attempting to set Farleigh up with a daughter of one of James’s friends. Her name is Sadie, and she is very pretentious and fake, from what you can tell. You hadn’t spoken to her, but you watched from afar as she and Farleigh engaged in a conversation.

“She’s alright,” He shrugs and stands up to press the cigarette out on his ashtray. He sits back down next to you and sighs.

“She was like, hardcore flirting with you,” You chuckle and observe his exasperated expression. “Oh, I know.” He smirks smugly and you roll your eyes.

“That’s weird, usually you hook up with someone the moment they show interest in you,” You smile at the way he frowns slightly. “That’s not true,” He furrows his eyebrows and glances at you. “Okayyy,” You say sarcastically.

A while later, you are still upstairs with Farleigh, but you are now feeling the effects of all the alcohol you’ve consumed. You both had gone downstairs to steal more booze, and you ended up drinking almost all of it. Your whole body feels tingly and warm, and your brain is fuzzy.

You run a hand through your tousled hair and sigh, turning to check if Farleigh is as wasted as you. He seems slightly better off than you, but his dark eyes are half lidded and glossy.

“Do you ever miss Sasha?” He glances at you, seeming surprised at your random question. Sasha is Farleigh’s ex from Oxford, who he had endured a tumultuous and rollercoaster ride of a relationship with. You had met her once or twice, she seemed kind, but slightly possessive.

“Sasha?” Farleigh repeats her name and takes a moment to process it. It seems like memories are returning to him and replaying in his head.

“Sometimes. But not really. She was crazy,” He raised his eyebrows and stared straight ahead. “You guys broke up and got back together, like, ten times,” You giggle foolishly and he turns to look at you, slightly offended by your amusement.

“It was too hard to keep up with,” You sigh after your laughter subsides. 

“I didn’t know you were keeping up,” You make eye contact once again with Farleigh, and this time his gaze is more intense. You can’t tell if it’s one of his usual sarcastic comments or if there was an underlying meaning behind his tone. Your face burns red with the realization that you had been studying his relationship so closely. But, really, everyone in your friend group knew about Sasha and Farleigh’s dumpsterfire of a romance. Break up, random hook ups, they said they love each other, then they argued again.

“It’s just.. what friends do,” You reply, your speech slurred. “Friends keep up with each other’s relationships.” You shrug and wave your hand as if to dismiss the seriousness of it.

“You consider me a friend?” Farleigh chuckles, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “Well, what if I do?” Your voice comes out softer than you intended. 

There’s another long moment of silence and prolonged eye contact between you two. The tension is so thick, you can feel it in the air and your heart pounds. It’s almost like you are waiting for who will make the next move. Your brain is all muddled and you can’t seem to think clearly.

Your eyes flicker down to his plush lips and you can’t tell if it’s the alcohol or not, but your instinct is to kiss him. You grab him by the face, a hand on either cheek, and pull him in, smashing your lips together sloppily. You pull away, shocked at yourself, dropping your hands into your lap as your lips hover over his.

You expect him to be disgusted and stand up and walk away, but there’s a slight pause before he is grabbing you and pulling you back in, kissing you almost aggressively. Like he’s been starved, like there’s not enough of you.

You squeak with surprise before you melt into him, softening as one of his hands travels down to your neck and the other settles on your waist. You both have to gasp for air in between sloppy kisses, but you don’t mind. Your heart races and your hands travel up into his hair, running your hands through his unruly dark curls. You find that you’ve been waiting so long to do that, to feel his hair in your hands.

He bites your lower lip and your eyebrows pinch together. “Sorry,” He mumbles, although his voice disappears into your mouth. You feel yourself losing balance and beginning to fall back onto the floor.

Before you know it, he’s on top of you, refusing to stop kissing you. It’s messy and you know you’re both drunk, but damn does it feel good. The tension feels like it’s being lifted off of you, and it’s relieving. You don’t know how long it will last but hell, you’re enjoying it. Both of his hands have moved to your hips and his fingers are pressing into you.

You feel his lips move from yours, moving down from your jaw to your neck. He’s kissing and sucking on your skin so passionately that you know you will have bruises tomorrow. You moan quietly and you hear him groan in response, his low voice vibrating against your neck.

You attempt to catch your breath as you suddenly feel something in your stomach, something unpleasant. Saliva begins to build in your mouth and it’s like you have an internal clock telling you how much time you have left before you absolutely hurl.

“Far-Farleigh,” You place your hands on his shoulders. You whimper and slightly push up on him. He glances up from your neck, staring up at you in confusion. You can’t deny that you enjoy viewing him from this angle, but you have other concerns at the moment.

“Gonna throw up,” You manage to get out before he’s rolling off of you, allowing you to get up. You clamber to your feet and scramble into the connecting bathroom, barely making it to your knees in front of the toilet before you throw up. 

You grip both sides of the toilet for support as you practically spill your guts, coughing loudly. You would have liked some help or something from Farleigh, but it seems like he has just left you here to deal with it yourself.

You groan and wipe your mouth, sitting up and staring straight ahead in some sort of daze. You eventually come to your senses and stand up, flushing the toilet. You feel dizzy so you grab onto the counter of the sink to not lose balance, catching your reflection in the mirror.

Your hair is very messy, and your mascara is slightly smudged around your eyes. Your cheeks are warm and rosy, but in an unflattering way. You look like a wreck. 

When you walk back into his room, he’s gone. You sigh in frustration and press a hand to your aching and pounding forehead. Somehow, you stumble back to your room and flop onto your bed. You managed to avoid the small number of guests left in the house, along with Venetia and Felix. You just want to get some sleep after the shitshow that just happened. And you know you’ll be paying for it in the morning. 

2 YEARS EARLIER

You, Felix, and some of your other friends were gathered at the pub on a Friday night. There was chatter and the smell of cigarette smoke all around you. Felix returned from the bar and handed you a tall glass of beer.

You were focused on Farleigh and the girl who sat on his lap. Her hands were all over him, and he seemed totally enamored with her. She had a short skirt on and her wrists were covered in bracelets. She was pretty, you had to admit.

“Who’s that?” You asked, glancing up at Felix and pointing to the two. “Oh, that’s Sasha.” He replied. “She’s obsessed with Farleigh. And from what I can tell,” Felix sat down, pulling his chair closer to yours, “He’s liking it.”

You chuckled and took a sip of your beer. “Good for him,” You said, shrugging. “Bet they’ve already fucked,” Felix remarked and you snapped your head towards him. “Ew, Felix. That’s none of your business.” You made a disgusted expression.

“What? Everybody shags around here, it’s no surprise,” He shrugged nonchalantly. “Except you,” He added, grinning and nudging you. You rolled your eyes and looked back towards Sasha and Farleigh.

You didn’t want to imagine them… doing that. But for some reason, your mind kept trying to paint a picture of it. You shook your head to clear your thoughts. 

You didn’t know why, but for some reason, you felt jealousy bubbling up inside of you. Why was it so easy for her to get what she wanted? You had liked a few men at Oxford, but you didn’t really even want a boyfriend or a commitment like that.

But as you watched Farleigh and Sasha’s hands intertwine, you felt envious.

“Hey, Felix, who was that guy you were going to introduce me to?” You asked, tapping your fingers against the table. “What? Oh, Joshua? I thought you said you didn’t want to meet him,” He replied. Felix was trying to set you up with one of his friends who seemed like a player. At this point, you didn’t care. It was like you were trying to prove that you could actually get a guy. Prove to who, though?

“I know. I changed my mind,” You said decidedly. “Well, he’s actually here tonight. Would you like me to go grab him?” Felix stood up and pointed towards the other side of the pub. You nodded. “Sure,”

You waited patiently and took a few swigs of beer for confidence. A minute later, Felix returned with a man who was a few inches shorter than him, with fluffy blonde hair and hazel eyes. Freckles were dusted across his nose and his skin was nicely tanned due to the warmer weather of spring. He looked sweet and innocent, but the rumors you had heard about him told you otherwise.

“Hello,” He greeted you, holding out his hand. You stood up to shake his hand, smiling as you introduced yourself. “Nice to meet you, I’m Joshua.” He grinned brightly and Felix seemed amused by the interaction.

“Hi, Joshua.” You tried to make a good first impression, although you weren’t good at this stuff. But it seemed like he was already interested, looking you up and down.

You both sat back down and began small talk about classes and life and friends. Felix left you two alone, but you’re not sure where he went. It was good, talking to someone new, but still a bit uncomfortable since you were so introverted. The conversation flowed nicely between the both of you.

You couldn’t help but feel like someone was watching you. You glanced up, seeing Farleigh’s cold gaze drilling into yours, flicking back and forth between you and Joshua. It was like he was waiting to see who would break eye contact first, and of course, it was you. Your gaze faltered down to the table and then back up to Joshua.

“You alright, love?” He asked, placing a hand on your thigh. You nodded and your face turned a shade of pink with embarrassment. “Sorry. Just thinking,”

“Hey, what do you say when we go back to my dorm? To just chill, relax, you know.” He tilted his head and you could already tell what he was implying. “Uh- Sure, yeah. Let’s go,” You smiled and stood up, grabbing your bag and walking past him toward the doors. He placed a hand on your lower back as you stepped by him.

You woke up the next morning unsure of where you were before memories of the night before came back to you. You were in Joshua’s bed, tangled up in the sheets, with your clothes off and scattered on the floor.

Your eyes widened as you realized you had lost your virginity to Joshua Brown. You sat up and scratched your head, not sure what to do next.

“Oh my God…” You whispered, looking down at Joshua, who was sleeping on his stomach, his face pressed against the pillow. It didn’t look like he was waking up anytime soon.

You stood up and winced as you realized you were a bit sore. You tried to be as quiet as possible as you picked your clothes up off the floor, hurriedly putting them back on.

Joshua stirred in his sleep and groaned, rolling over. You grimaced as you took your bag off of his desk chair, tip toeing to the door and opening it slowly.

You sighed with relief once you had closed his door behind you and you were safely out in the hallway. You know you probably looked like a wreck, but your main goal at the moment was to get back to your own dorm going unnoticed.

You heard your name being called, fairly close to you. You froze before turning to identify where it came from, and you swear your heart dropped to your ass. Farleigh was standing in the doorway of his room, which was conveniently right next door to Joshua’s, smirking at your frazzled state.

“You should work on keeping it down. I couldn’t sleep last night because I kept hearing you and Joshua.” He chuckled and you could feel your face heating up.

“Sorry,” You muttered, casting your glance downwards to the floor. 

“You finally got some after all,” He teased. “Can you shut up?” You groaned, facepalming and shaking your head. “Oh, I will if you can figure out how to,” He raised his eyebrows. “Was it really that good?” He questioned.

You considered the question. You didn’t really know if it was or not, you were just trying to be loud because you thought guys liked that. Were you satisfied by the end? No. But Joshua certainly was.

He seemed to notice your puzzled expression and he nodded. “Oh. So the rumors are true about him.” You tilted your head with curiosity. “What rumors?” You asked.

“Oh, you poor thing.” He cooed sarcastically. You narrowed your eyes at him and crossed your arms. “Well, you’d better get back to your place so you can study,” Farleigh mocked. “Make up for that time you lost last night, huh?”

“Can you just not tell anyone? Please?” You knew it was useless asking him not to tell. He had the biggest mouth in the whole class. He just snickered at your pleading and stepped back into his room and shut his door.

That night you hung out with Joshua in his dorm once more, but you told him you didn’t want to have sex again. He respected your decision, so you were just drinking some alcohol with him and making out occasionally.

“Yeah, I don’t really know what I’m going to do with an English degree. I just had to pick something.” He shrugged. You were talking about your futures after Oxford and what you were both majoring in.

“Hm. Well, there’s a lot you could do,” You replied, trying to reassure him, although you weren’t too sure yourself. “You could be-” Your sentence is cut short by a loud moan coming from the room next to you.

“Ah, shit. It’s Farleigh and Sasha again,” Joshua shook his head like it was a regular occurence. “They’re usually at it for a while,” He informed you. “Do you want to go somewhere else?”

Some odd, depraved part of you wanted to stay and listen. “No, that’s alright.” You shrugged. “Surely it can’t be that bad.”

The walls seemed paper thin. You swear you could hear every little noise, like the bed springs squeaking and the wanton sounds that came from Sasha. But then you heard something different. It was Farleigh, whimpering and moaning in a way that you couldn’t even believe what you were hearing. You didn’t know men could make sounds other than grunting during sex, let alone sounds like that.

“Oh fuck,” You heard him breathe heavily and Sasha was practically screaming at this point. 

“Damn. They’re really getting into it,” You whistled and raised your eyebrows. Joshua nodded. “I wish I was as good as people say he is,” Joshua looked down. “What?” You asked as you tried to ignore the continuous noises. He was really telling you to be quieter earlier today?

“Farleigh. People say he’s really good in bed,” Joshua explained. You were surprised that he was okay with discussing this with you. “Oh.” You chuckled nervously. You didn’t expect that, but for some reason it made sense. “Was I bad?” Joshua asked suddenly.

You froze at his question and wondered if you should tell him the truth. “I mean… I don’t really… know the difference, you know? It was my first time, remember?” You told him. He nodded but you could tell he seemed hurt and defeated.

“Right,” He awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck and you leaned back in your chair. You could say this was one of the most embarrassing moments of your life, having to listen to Farleigh fuck some girl while having an awkward conversation with the man you had a one night stand with.

The next day around noon, you were walking to a café near campus when you saw Farleigh walking ahead of you on the sidewalk of the cobblestone streets.

An idea popped into your head and you smiled mischievously, jogging to catch up with him. When you appeared at his side, he glanced down and made a face.

“Are you following me?” He asked, glaring at you as you fell into step next to him. “No. I just had a complaint,” You tried to hide the smile threatening your face. “What’s that?” He quirked an eyebrow.

“Me and Joshua were trying to have a nice conversation last night,” You started, and his playful expression immediately dropped. “Maybe try to keep it down next time, right?” You grinned and he stopped in his tracks.

“You were there last night?” He seemed annoyed and a little bit shocked. “Yeah.” You nodded and stopped next to him. “I mean, I couldn’t even hear my own thoughts,” You laughed to yourself and he narrowed his dark eyes at you.

“And it wasn’t even Sasha as much as it was you–” “Keep your mouth shut,” He ordered, and you knew you got a rise out of him. “Practice what you preach, that’s all I’m saying,” You waved and skipped along the sidewalk, leaving him standing there in shock.

taglist: @isla-finke-blog @ibimbogrl @drunkmysticsquirrel @alonia-olivia @novemilady @saltburnsworld

[what-if-i-like-my-mechs-older]

(Warning I absolutely have a daddy kink, no ones acting younger or anything, just like calling someone daddy, this is my blog, writing this for me, if you have a problem with it just roll away it's not like I forced you to read this. Megatron is the one who's the 'daddy' Megatron also calls Orion kitten, again dont like just scroll on.)

Optimus watched him with bleary optics, he felt wonderful, content even, maybe he could go another round , but something slower, something more sensual this time.

Checking his systems while lazily lifting a hand , hoping to see some small remainder of colour that wasn't his, wishing for a small clue, but there was nothing.

The idea that the mech who'd had him in the prison would be able to look at him and know what they'd done and never know their face. For all he knew they could stay lurking in the shadows watching him until their next chance.

Neither of them had been quiet, so it wasn't exactly a secret what had occurred. their time had been playful , dirty, and fun, smiling to himself even those kisses had been like fire.

He knew it wasn't Megatron, there was something that said you will look at me, I want to see everything you are about him.

"I suppose now that you're satisfied, your flirtatious attentions toward me will quiet down now."

Megatron was the first to speak, after all he was used to Starscream sneaking up on him he wasn't exactly going to miss an Autobot waking up.

He skimmed through another data pad, just another complaint about something inane and frowned at it.

"Oh , what makes you say that?"

Orion asked wistfully, a dreamy expression on his features.

"Well, for one I'm not the type to keep my idtenty from my partners....not only that I'd have been far too recognisable..."

"Jealous are we?"

Optimus purred coming up behind him and sliding his arms around his neck.

Megatron was still, but even from the autobots field he didn't sense the slightest bit of malice, it was nice to know despite their other worldly differences , emp fields still existed in the Autobots.

"No, I'm sure there's much I could entice you with , were you perhaps similar to my age, there are plenty of younger Decepticons on board....such as Starscream."

Megatron returned , not moving away from the nuzzle Orion gave him, he even subtly leaned into it.

"Hmm I'm sure I'll get to him eventually, but my sights were first set on you when I first entered this world, before I knew who you were, I couldn't help but think you were handsome with that lovely facial structure of yours."

He traced a finger along one of Megatron's cheekbones because unless you can tell me a better way to describe them, I'm calling them that....bleh.

Optimus watched him and his reactions, kissing his cheek softly.

"Something tells me, the mood has to strike you before you're into a little gun play."

"I literally turn into a gun"

Megatron replied a little too eagerly, well there went sounding calm and suave. Of course he shouldn't care that maybe he sounded like an old mech who wanted to feel attractive, who felt past his Prime and good for nothing but his war.

Optimus grinned as he saw him crack a data pad and spoke softly

"Are you the type with a barrel that's long, smooth, the kind I could..."

He whispered the rest into Megatron's audio receptor and there went the data pad snapped in half sparking between the two halves.

"Primus Damnit Autobot, you're not even flirting like this to gain anything, I feel nothing in that field of yours that has any ill intent, no want to save anyone, you're seducing us because you like it?!"

Megatron really was bewildered and yet the idea of putting the barrel of his transformed self where Orion had suggested and bringing him to overload that way....his face plate burned, it'd been too long since anyone actually tried to seduce him without intending to gain anything and he didn't know what to do with that.

He managed to calm himself, that was an extremely enticing offer...but there was something he could read under the layers in the Autobots field.

Patting his arm gently, his hand stilled , stroking a thumb over red.

"You're not up for fast and exciting and right now neither am I, but if you miss a spike being in you that much...and my being of a mature age does not bother you-"

Megatrons voice brought comfort to Orion as he listened to the softeness that was no doubt not often spoken by the Decepticon leader.

"I've always liked older mechs...as for wanting a spike...right now it's more about feeling the closeness and warmth of another and being joined to them."

Orion didn't even ask as he straddled Megatron's lap , arms back around his neck resting his cheek on his shoulder.

"I see, just like cyber kitten, you want to be petted and played with hmm?"

Megatron chuckled affectionately , hands sliding along Orion's thighs , one supporting his back as he wetted two fingers and told him to open up.

He managed a small peek at what was behind the panel but he understood what Orion meant , as he touched him, out the corner of his optic he could see an ear final flicking and savoured the soft mewl that left him as he pet his pretty Autobot.

"You like that don't you kitten?"

Orion nodded, starting to squirm as Megatron's fingers touched him, stroking along the line of his node, adding pressure at just the right moments.

His engine actually started rumbling contentedly as the Decepticon leader played with him.

Taking in the sensation and soft pleasure of it, this was about sensation and feeling good, something slow to be savoured.

"Yes...Daddy."

He moaned softly , holding on a little tighter as his hips started moving.

Megatron's brain glitched a second but settled.

"Only in the berthroom do you call me that, do you understand pet?"

Orion moved back to look at him and nodded, whining as a finger slipped in.

Megatron could see it still in those Optics, bright and glowing as they were thick lined in black with flushed purple cheeks, he was being submissive to get what he wanted, right now he was what Orion wanted and it was hard to deny such a pretty creature as it bounced slowly on two fingers that were now inside it.

There was something incredibly intimate about the lack of rushing to tear each other apart, the want to simply touch and focus only on sensation, before Orion had even finished coming down to kiss him , Megatron's lips parted, welcoming it, their optics closed as he worked him more, soon he'd be ready.

"Wait..."

The autobot leader panted, taking Megatron's hand, and keeping his gaze on him as he slowly suckled on the two fingers that seemed to know exactly how to please a valve.

"Something wrong kitten?"

He asked , fingers already itching to either push back further on that lovely glossa of his or back where they had been.

"No heh daddy, but seeing as you work hard all the time, maybe...I should take care of you instead?"

Yes , that seductive bot who'd first come on their ship was right here, submissive when he needed to be, observing to see what others wanted or liked, clever little thing wasn't he.

Tbc...

Next piece

Previous piece

First piece

[thornswoggled]

yori is fumiki and heres why: my manifesto

or: wait, we werent all on the same page about this?

i should have written this when i first read chapter 98, but im only getting around to it now. this is less me trying to convince you, the reader, and more hoarding all my collected thoughts on why yori is absolutely fumiki, if its a red herring its a silly one, and if he isnt or if its left ambiguous forever i will eat crow. here we go:

before i start let me say most of my evidence is the way yamazaki frames him visually rather than solid "proof." comics are an artform, theres a reason things get framed the way they do, and her artistic choices in ch 98 (i feel) are meant to serve as a big blinking neon light that says "you should be feeling this way about xyz right now"

iic, there were rumblings of "the young auditor" being fumiki as far back as his introduction in ch 51 due to to his unique ability:

which is essentially a refined version of fumikis innate ability to keep fae away. we know yori is part of a "family business," and it seems appropriate that with the proper training, he would be able to freeze fae in their tracks rather than simply ward them off

unfortunately this is where "evidence" ends and "vibes" begin

chapter 51 didnt get adapted into what was otherwise a pretty faithful adaptation in season 2, and i understand why - theres a lot going on, and this chapter is fairly out of left field. but theres one other quip that got left out of season 2:

this is a one-off thought that wouldnt have been difficult to include in the anime. imo, i believe this line from ch 62 didnt get animated because we hadnt met fumiki yet like we did in the manga. now, onto more recent chapters... (under a read more because this is going to get pretty long)

chise and yoris first meeting is framed in a very purposeful way. in chapter 98, elias is preoccupied with ousting all the outsiders so that he and chise can be alone, stuck on the idea that "christmas is for family only:"

and three pages later, who do we meet?

im really struck by the way chise and yori are drawn together here. personally, i dont read this as "chise is meeting a new unimportant side character," this is "the strings of fate have pulled us miraculously back together again"

waiter! waiter! can i get an order of drifting sakura petals and sparkles with this panel? am i waxing poetic here or do you see it? the way theres no background drawn here, no other characters, even in later pages when we know elias is standing right behind chise, he doesnt get included in frame so that its just the two of them:

while im at it, can we appreciate how theyre wearing the same outfit? black pants and a hip-length dark coat/sweater with oversized pockets, a collar, and six left-sided buttons. yoris dark gloves also evoke chises cursed arm here but i dont want to risk looking like a maniac any more than i already do. i mean... dude, look at them, theyre matching

speaking of matching, lets pop back to 51 for a sec

both yori and chise have canine familiars! actually, it looks like yori might have multiple - look at all those pokeballs i mean bamboo tubes in his coat. if my memory serves, we didnt know yori was japanese at this point, but everyone assumed so because of the appearance of this familiar... which was another log on the "this might be fumiki" fire

fun fact: this little dude is almost certainly a kuda-kitsune, which were said to be kept in tubes and summoned by a soothsayer, who could use it to perform curses, or tell the past and future

and the drama with which we find out his "name":

"i bet you were expecting me to say fumiki, huh. good luck im not giving you that this early you have to work for it." as far as aliases go, "ri" could be derived from "hatori," but neither of the kanji in "fumiki" can be read as "yo," so its probably just random

after yori leaves, we get another repetition of "christmas is for family," which at this point feels like yamazaki is leading us to water and dunking our head in it:

i think its awfully convenient that ruth was absent for chises exchange with yori. do you think he would have been able to smell that theyre related? or whiffed the kuda-kitsune in his coat?

right after this, too, we get this line from elias which i have been thinking about a lot:

theres a few different ways this could be read, so im not married to any one interpretation, but it could be foreshadowing "if chise decides to pursue a relationship with her estranged family, what will i do then?" as gabriella would say, "i hate to be a third wheel"

given what we have seen of yoris aloof personality, i have to imagine there will be drama if/when the reveal is made. sadly i can picture him actually pushing chise away if she tries to reestablish a relationship with him

now! that is pretty much where my thoughts end, but i do want to share questions/doubts i have:

if yori read all of simons reports to determine he was an unfit observer, there is no way he doesnt know chises full name. i wonder whether he had any reaction to it? he may assume that its just a coincidence. i briefly wondered if the hatori name was an invention by yuuki, until i remembered that the family chise stays with in the OVA also has the same name. unless yuuki was adopted by another family like seth...? dont mind me, im going pepe silvia mode over here

have i mentioned i talked about yuuki before in another theory post? take it with a grain of salt, i already got proven wrong on one front now that jasper has been introduced

will yuuki be reintroduced if fumiki is? i desperately want chise to get that closure, but this scene from ch 42 has a sense of finality to it, a sort of "you will never get to resolve things with your father or see his side of things" stank:

... actually, now that ive mentioned the kuda-kitsune, can we look at this thing again?

another word for the kuda-kitsune is "izuna," which is read in modern japanese as "weasel." could the critter whos watching yuuki here come from the same place as yoris familiars? yuuki leaves his family immediately after this - getting summoned maybe?

okay, okay, let me stop myself here before i start looking like im ranting and raving. can we talk about the mail, please, mac? ive been dying to talk about the mail with you all day, ok? "pepe silvia," this name keeps coming up over and over again. every day pepe's mail is getting sent back to me. pepe silvia! pepe silvia! i look in the mail, and this whole box is pepe silvia!

if youre a fence-sitter, what are your thoughts? do you think we just dont have enough evidence yet? inquiring minds want to know

[gleefultogo]

page 893 & 894

Alright. so can't ignore the elephant in the room. but what the actual fuck where these two latest pages? First of all the most down played and terrible explanation on why your quote on quote father is "damaged" like i'm sorry but ronja's daughters are gonna be young adults very soon at some point and she had't told them about ranach yet? like girl what were you waiting on. this entire convo was long overdue and kique rushed it so fast and swept it under the rug to get it over with, it's so poorly executed. fucking vandi, kargo and ferah could 100% vouch for her explanation on why he's so terrible. cause no rogio doesn't count, he enabled his actions and did stuff for him. he's just as bad and their relationship wasn't toxic unless proved. I wouldn't trust rogio as my damn uncle as far as I can throw him. again fuck that guy lol. but anyways, vandi is technically their grandmother now, this entire convo should of at least been a decent amount of pages maybe 4 at most instead of just saying "oh he killed people" like he did way more then "kill" he raped and should have an eye awakening of the past tribe living and how he manipulated their own mother. naeva's reaction is bit bratty when I first read this page, and honestly I thought she was stupid. as she rather listen to her own morals then her mothers over a father she never met, it doesn't matter as he has never been around in their lives for her to give a shit about him. also how is naeva gonna know its her father? does her mother have a fucking picture of him somewhere? she never stated his color or anything specific about his character appearance. since these dogs are apparently clearly aware of color and markings. though in a small degree, i kinda agree how she is reacting? she's still being a bit of a bitch honestly. but because her own mother refused to give her a detailed explanation and have her daughters truly understand why he's a "big threat". i feel like she could of easily said their father died or something if it mattered that much to her that she doesn't want her daughters to truly end up seeking him. I just feel, now that we might have this anti child turning evil motive that doesn't really make sense? there's really no real reason for them to switch sides and betray their mother if that's a possibility other than to just appease ranach since he can manipulate thats about it. it'll just be for dramatic useless tension. anyways... so instead of ronja being a parent and not going after her own daughter to try and talk some sense into her as this is a vulnerable topic for both of them now. instead we get the worst and dumbest transition in the next page. its night time now and what does ronja do? well instead of again reaching out to her daughter. deer dog pops up into her tent and well they basically have sex. we are once given the cycle that sex cures everything and holy shit i don't know how she can be in the mood for that. like omg just talk about your problems for once without fucking each other. also idk what deer dog means by "tender soul" my dude you barely been around her kids, every-time you were on screen you were either by ronja or standing in the background. I doubt you know what her daughter is like and just exactly know how she'd react. but honestly if naeva sneaks off or goes searching for her father. gotta say it's ronja's fault at that point cause she didn't give a care enough about her own daughters safety and rather get bonded. also off topic kinda, but I keep seeing people claim that naeva as the "black pup" is it just me? I don't see her as black in color, unless my eye sight is really bad and I dont know it. but I honestly have been confused by it. I'd consider her dark toned comapared to her sisters. but not black color wise.

[ventismacchiato]

i have so many thoughts apologies for rant

1. At first I would have humored for lols MonaYN getting tgt but Mona is literally using Y/N to make Scara jealous and (if mona kissed the dancer while dating scara) she literally cheated on Scara why are we moving past this rn… (but even it was after they broke up i feel like it’s cheating if you’re touching up on other people too, no??) 😭 Y/N does not need that in their life, get behind me

2. “He could've gone with Mona.” / “but the Mona you're seeing now feels oddly different from the one who'd dated Scara.” / “And bonus, got to make Scara upset." / "You seemed pretty determined to win... for Mona." | these lines pissed me off ngl esp the last one?? are YOU AN IDIOT?? 😭 Y/N is not only naive but just, what do you even call this behavior?? i don’t even wanna call it obliviousness bc where in the fuck did you see scara determined to win FOR MONA?? HIS EX THAT HE’S CLEARLY NOT HAPPY TO BE AROUND PLEASE be so serious

i love your writing kai i love you i love your brain but these certain lines that Y/N thinks of just makes me question their brain power 😔 please lord never get jealous over mona because scara does not like that girl AND SHE WAS USING HIM LIEKFHIGKFEIS

3. what redemption… could there possibly be for this diva 😔 she’s manipulative… manipulators get sent to the nono square instead of redemption (repenting on the other hand tho- but would she repent? would she actually?) AND IF SHE’S A CHEATER?! hands in head

ANYWHAJD i love the update as always u cooked my liege (staring at childe and diluc why cant we change the focus to them yae?! you have proper ship content right there just kick ynscara off to another island. have cameras in their villa and record them interacting over the next three days /j) thank you for the yummy writing eats it!! happy holidays 💜💜

NEVER SAY SORRY FOR A RANT I LOVE RANTS

1) THANK U OMG SOMEONE GETS IT lmao ik ppl r mostly joking when they say they want monayn but i tried to write her as not so nice to show why scara dislikes her sm…and yes technically cheating even if it was for a performance basically the entire relationship was her trying to make him jealous to get news outlets to talk about them so she cud get clout yk…and i have more reasons coming next chapter of why he dislikes her

1) IM SORRY HELP. GIVE YN A MINUTE the dock scene was supposed to show both of them coming around, mainly scara. scara has pretty much realized he has feelings for yn but won’t accept it himself esp after he just found out yn had an ex so he’s feeling like he doesn’t know know anything about them and yn is like so close…they just need another push…which is coming next chapter 😛. PLS DONT HATE THEM TOO MUCH LMFAO I UNDERSTAND UR FRUSTRATION THO IM SORRY THIS IS THE MISCOMMUNICATION TROPE

3) LMFAO not too much redemption dw just like some closure between scara and her but also not rlly…idk i haven’t thought too far into it yet i’m workshopping it #ineedtoplan take anything i say with a grain of salt 😭 i originally had smth in plan for her but i don’t think ill do it anymore 😛

AND AHH UR WELCOME TY FOR READING I LOVE READING UR THOTS AND LMFAOOO i’ll feed u guys chiluc content just wait a bit

happy holidays 😇

[elainsgirl]

thank you for always being reasonable.

why are we even discussing whether elain is next? We know she is. Sjm said she knows who the first two spinoff are about, but is choosing between different potential pairings after that. We know she has researched for elains book. So we know elains book is next even without reading the books. And reading the books is so clear. Elain is coming next. And she has chosen Azriel, who is feral over her. It

This fandom is so strange sometimes. Arguing for four years over what is already clear. I've been in this fandom for years, although becoming increasingly disillusioned. I'm tired of being called insane, delusional and anything under the sun for simply reading books as they are and seeing what every other casual reader sees, and minding my own business. I'm leaving now, until we get an announcement. Just like countless others non-confrontational users have left over the years. I can't stand the constant arguing over nothing even though I try to stay out of it and filter it out. It will have been for nothing when elains book is eventually announced. Which has been obvious for four years.

What are your thoughts of all this?

Hey anon 🫶

Thank you sm for the kind words 💕

For antis’ ships to work, as you know, Gwynriel has to happen before Elucien hence Elains book has to come last & Azriels first. Their ships dont logically work otherwise and they know this. The whole reason there’s a debate on whether or not Elains book is next - is due to individuals quite literally being in denial/delusional - hoping through some miracle Sjm will decide to write about Azriel and a new character we have just met instead of the Elain book she had planned and researched well in advance. Apparently Gwyn showing up in a *few* pages of a bonus = her pov next despite the fact - even by using their own flawed logic, Elain appeared in 2 bonuses. One talked about her future arc, the other left her and Az on a cliffhanger which was the same technique used for Nessian/Feysand.

Even eluciens’ know there is no way Lucien is getting his pov in the next book. So if elains book is confirmed to be next - that is the end of elucien. Hence why they go red explaining how her book has to be last despite that contradicting so much of what Sjm has said and confirmed. As for gwynriel, they’re just delusional. When an author has literally stated she left clues for Elains book within the last book yet you are still insisting that Az will share a book with Gwyn - it speaks for itself.

I think these past 4 years have really shown how how far people would go to convince themselves something they hate isn’t happening. It would make a good psychology study tbh - who knows, someone may do it in the future. I think this new wave of antis that have recently joined the fandom: 1) don’t have fandom etiquette 2) have no sense of logically creating an arguement for their ship - that side has genuinely decreased in being logical and making sense. As far as nowadays, they’re just denying canon and lying about the books/interviews. You can’t argue with these types of people’ and they don’t want you to argue with them. Either agree with their baseless takes or get called stupid for disproving them before they block you.

Honestly- I understand the frustration so much, because you’re arguing with something thats so in the face obvious, clear and logical. Ong, its as simple as 2 + 2 = 4 - but then an oddball comes around and says no, Its 5 and you’re just left dumbfounded at how someone can be so confident in being wrong. That is what the acotar fandom feels like. It doesn’t help that Elain/Elriel have always been unpopular therefore have always been hated. As you, I have also been in the fandom for years. I’ve literally grown up and spent teen years in this fandom and year by year, it becomes less enjoyable and more frustrating. I love taking breaks every now and then because you honestly do need to step back from time to time - it helps so much especially if you start getting into other less toxic fandoms.

wise choice anon on leaving the fandom. If thats what you need, then you do you. You’re right, there is literally no point in arguing anymore. Everything has been said and done. Its not like antis are coming up with new and interesting takes to debunk either. This year, I feel like the fandom has been half-dead. Most people have moved on to better things as they should. Sarah isn’t announcing anything anytime soon. For me personally, im going to ride out these last 5 months. Im giving it until May for Mass to announce something about acotar 5. Idc if she only announces who the next book is about. I just need something from her. Whilst I will be deeply satisfied when proven right - in the end, majority of the people will still read an elain/elriel book. So it really does not matter & isn’t that deep.

My general thoughts are - we are going to see a LOT more BS takes from gwynriels & eluciens as they scramble about trying to prove their ship is happening - as time comes closer, I think we will have a lot of antis coming out and saying they don’t care anymore on who the next book is about whilst others that are more deep into the Ga/El side are still going to deny elriel happening. Take breaks and loosely be part of the fandom - we are not getting anything until spring time. There is no point - literally 0 - getting into petty arguements with the other side. Keep your peace, use the block and not interested button as much as you can. Join another fandom - there are so many authors out there who treat their fandoms better then Sjm & her team has treated the acotar fandom.

My blog will always be open to anyone that wants to vent/rant share thoughts or discuss on theories/arguements for and against elriel 🌸

Its just these last few months. It’ll fly by quickly. Hopefully.