#also i hate 'step on me mommy' stuff. that didn't stop being a thing

[maridiayachtclub]

see like. the first character i played was a femroe. people who have been following forever might know that, but i started my current run of this game seven years ago. seven! ugh. so it hasn't really come up in a while.

but this was sort of at the behest of someone else. i followed a friend onto my server, and they wanted me to play some big hot lady, and i liked playing a big hot lady for them, because we do a little bit of gender envy here at maridia yacht club industries. but that player eventually fucked off and left me to continue through the game on my own, so i didn't have the social pressure to pick one race or another. and don't get me wrong, i think playing a roe was a lot of fun, and my character looked really good. absolutely satisfied.

but i like playing little gnome and halfling and dwarf things more, and part of what got me into FFXIV was watching fan videos made by creative lalafells. lalafells are hilarious! i wanted that gremlin energy for myself. and so i ended up fantasia'ing my character to one and renaming her to something lalafell-appropriate a few months later. i had just finished Heavensward. i've played around with fantasias since then for temporary stints, but as far as i'm concerned my main character has always been a lalafell. total retcon. there never was a roe

so i start my MSQ replay a couple months ago, and i'm playing another lalafell. and it's great! lalafells are hilarious! no regrets. okay, well, one regret: glamming around another character who looks very much like the first you've spent a lot of time assembling outfits and glams for is not nearly as rewarding as i feel like it would be for a more novel body type. and the story, which is a big focus, feels like it rhymes just a little too much with what i'm already familiar with.

so since the alt has a couple of "free" fantasias, i start wondering if i should use some of them. so lots of considering of alts ensues and i'm leaning more and more towards a roegadyn, and i start playing with character options and thinking "if i did fantasia, what would I do" and i create what i think is a cool and unique new femroe that is meaningfully distinct from the two i have previously played (yeah there was another one before all this but this ain't about her). until i actually check and realize that aside from some minute color differences i have recreated my first roe entirely.

so now my thoughts are like... okay, what if she gets to pick up the heroic career that got hijacked out from under her? that's a cool meta-narrative. a hero that arises out of her own narrative obsolescence to carry on her quest! wow! but then i think, if i do switch, am i committing the same offense against lalafell #2? i like that character even if she's samey. she's still different in her own ways, and in how i think she would react to future events.

anyway that's how i went from years of "i don't have any interest in alts in FFXIV. barf no thanks" to "I keep wanting to make alts~ tee hee~"

I'm honestly thinking of fantasia-ing my FFXIV alt to a femroe, but the moment I get some kind of 'uuuu step on me mommy' shit I know I'm gonna turbo regret it

[lokisprettygirl]

Lose me to Love you (Loki x Female Reader) (AU) (18+)

Read Chapter 11 here / Series Masterlist

Chapter 12

Summary: Loki finds himself stuck between his feelings and fears.

Trigger Warning: Extreme dark themes, Sexual abuse, physical abuse, public sex, Rough violent sex, 18+, Steamy stuff, Rough language, mention of suicide, talk of virginity and slut shaming, manipulative behaviour, mention of trauma, smut, toxic relationship between main characters. Dark themes, cult stuff.

"No not her… not her Thor…not her please" you were hiding in Loki's closet, he put you there because they were all looking for you, he asked you to not come out of there no matter what. Loki told you that they were playing hide and seek but if you're caught they'll hurt you so you had to keep quiet and stay hidden.

"Where's she? Brother? Are you trying to get yourself killed? Have you lost your mind?" You heard brother Thor yelling at him and it made you flinch so you placed your palm over your ears so you wouldn't have to hear their yelling. You hated it when people yelled at each other, reminded you of how daddy and mommy used to scream at each other. Why was Thor upset? Where was your mommy? Loki said she'll be back but it's been a week and you haven't seen her anywhere, you missed her alot. 

"Thorr listen to me for once, please brother I'm begging you, just for once, they'll be here soon, I have already tipped them" Loki said to him and Thor's eyes widened in confusion and fear.

"Tipped who Loki? What did you do?" Thor grabbed his collar as he questioned him, it's not that he didn't want to get out of this hell but it felt impossible under Odin's reign.

"The cops, I gave them everything, the pictures of the sacrifices, the fucking orgies, every fucking thing, enough is enough" Thor punched Loki as he finished his words.

"You fool. We will go to Jail too, you participated in those rituals, you didn't think about that?" Loki chuckled as Thor said that.

"I won't..they promised me I won't" 

"And what about me?" Thor's eyes teared up and so did Loki's, he didn't want to betray his brother but he didn't trust him either.

"Take mother and run..as fast as you can, as far as you can, never come back, I'll never tell anyone" Thor took a step back in disbelief as Loki said that.

"All of this for that girl?" 

"She's just a child Thor, she's so innocent and so were those other children we watched get hurt and killed" his voice choked on his own tears as he spoke, he was broken but he won't allow you to suffer or get hurt by the hands of his maniac father, he has sinned enough, he has been quiet for so long, not anymore though "She trusts me to keep her safe, and I'm going to protect her, I won't fail her like everyone else did, not her" 

"He won't stop loki..you know that, you know how desperate he's to go to As–" 

"I don't care..I never cared, you can believe the lies he had fed us all our lives but I'm done now, I'm not going to stay quiet and take this shit anymore"  

The last thing you remembered from that day before you woke up in that den was that Brother Clint and James had found you and you saw Lolo being beaten up.

He went back to the apartment as soon as he realized that Odin didn't escape just for revenge but he also wanted to finish the ritual.

As he reached home it was quiet and he was grateful to not bump into Jolene again, he stood outside your door for a moment contemplating if he should go in or not, what would he say to you? What were you expecting from him now? He twisted the knob and entered the bedroom, you were on the bed still awake so you sat up and looked at him,

"I want to shower" he said to you so you nodded.

"Why don't you use your bathroom?" 

"I don't want to see her" he mumbled as he took his jacket off, then his shirt followed, he grabbed a towel from the closet and headed towards the bathroom. When he came out with just a towel wrapped around his waist you couldn't help but gawk at his glistening wet muscles.

"You are drunk"

"Not really darling..give me something" 

"Whatt?" 

"Underwear, boxers.. anything of mine, I know you have it" you crossed your arms and glared at him for a moment before you decided to drop the act, you were obsessed with him and you weren't even ashamed of it, you got off the bed and took out a boxer briefs you had kept of him, you worn it sometimes when you felt like a bitch in heat and wanted to have something intimate of him to rub against. You also had his sweatpants so you handed him that as well.

"Turn around" he asked you and you looked at him shocked. Since when and why?

"Okay now you're making this weird for no reason..can we just..get back to being normal?

He sighed as you said that.

"Nooo not after what we talked about" 

"Nothing has changed you realize that right?" 

"It has changed now that I know you have been lying to me all this time..I don't want to be the same old condescending ass to a fucking virgin..I'm done playing this game with you" he said to you as he dropped the towel and quickly put the briefs on.

Your eyes teared up as he said that, at least you got to flirt with him and be a part of these erotic games, now because of your big mouth he was taking that away from you too. He looked at your sullen face and his heart clenched but he had to take control of the situation. He was about to step out the door when he heard your voice,

"I swear I'll never talk to you again if you step out of the door at this moment" your voice trembled as you spoke. He has been breaking your heart unknowingly all these years but now that he knew the truth he was continuing to do it. He turned around and glared at you at the threat,

"Don't you threaten me with that you hear me?" He walked towards you angrily and it only made you want to cry.

"I love you" you screamed 

"Stop saying that" he raised his voice too.

"I doo.." your voice broke 

"No you don't..you're infatuated there's a difference" he sounded desperate. 

You sniffled between your cries so he walked even closer to you and cupped your cheeks, you got on your tippy toes and kissed him right on the lips but he pulled away from you immediately, 

"Stoppp" 

"Why?" 

"I have to stop us darling..this will ruin everything" 

"Whyyyy?" you kissed him again and he grabbed your hair in his fist to pull yo away.

"Because it's you and me for life, we can't be together if we hate each other and are sick of being around each other all the time, that's what thissss will do to us"

He shook you gently by the shoulders as he spoke.

"Noooo..I could never hate you..I have yearned for you..I have prayed for you to return to me loki…please" you kissed him again and he pulled you away again, he opened his mouth to say something but he felt so weak, then to your delight he kissed you back this time. He placed his hands on your hips as he lifted you up in his arms, your fingers curled around his neck and he walked towards the closet press you against it.

You have never had such a feeling that you did at the moment, he tasted sweet, a hint of whiskey washed over you and it only intoxicated you further, his lips felt so soft against yours, he placed his thumb on your chin and opened your mouth so his tongue could clash with yours, he didn't ask for permission and you loved it, you belonged to him and you wanted him to take you however he wished to, fuck you were so in love with him that you'd do anything and everything he'd ever ask from you. 

As your sweet taste invaded his senses he was a goner. 4 years, he had spent 4 years trying to avoid this very moment but he failed, he might regret it later but for now he was in complete bliss, the sound of your muffled moans felt like music to his ears, he knew he'd be addicted to this feeling from this very second onwards. He licked a stripe with his tongue over your lips before he pulled away a little to breathe, placing his head between the crook of your neck he sucked on your neck softly which made you moan again, you couldn't believe this was really happening, it felt like a dream and dreams always seem to end sooner or later.

He put you down slowly on the floor and he was avoiding your gaze but you couldn't stop staring at him. It all felt surreal that you kissed him and he kissed you back. He didn't stop you and he didn't push you away.

Your arms wrapped around his waist and you pressed yourself flat against his chest, peppering soft kisses on his flesh, now that he had allowed you to cross that line with him, you didn't want to stop. The bruises from his previous sexcapade were still visible and they made you extremely jealous but like always you were concerned too. Why did hurt himself so much? This can not be pleasurable at all.

"What are you thinking?" You looked up as you asked him so he wrapped his hands around the back of your neck and kissed your forehead.

"Just thinking of the mess we are going to make of our lives now" his eyes teared up as he said that, he was scared and he had his reasons, he didn't trust you but it wasn't your fault anymore, his feelings had more to do with him then you, he thought this would make your relationship complicated and his fear wasn't baseless but how could you have made him believe that you weren't just in for the sex, how were you supposed to tell him that he defined your whole existence, it must not be healthy but you didn't give a shit about that, you were way past that.

"Am I attractive?" You asked him as you bent down on your knees slowly, his eyes widened at the gesture. Your palm rubbed over his bulge and he let out a shaky little moan. 

"You are so god damn beautiful darling" he barely whispered as you continued to rub your hands over the hardness of his cock.

"But you find me attractive? Sexy? Fuckable?" You were about to pull his pants down but he stopped you.

"I wouldn't have kissed you like that if I wasn't attracted to you" you bit on your lips as he said that. He was attracted to you, oh!!! lord he was attracted to you.

"Let me do this for you.. please " 

"Nooo babyyy noooo not–" he paused as he bent down a little and wrapped his hands around your waist to pick you up effortlessly "Yet" 

He placed his lips onto yours and your legs encased around his waist, he put you down on the bed slowly and then he laid down next to you. He didn't say anything and neither did you, well at least not for a little while.

"Please don't allow her to disrespect you like that, you're not hers anymore.. Whatever we have between us is not disgusting or unethical. I'm an adult Loki, I have been for years now, you didn't watch me grow up, I'm not the girl you had saved years ago, don't let anyone make you feel like a pervert for this" you mumbled to him softly so he pulled you closer to him, the warmth of his body lulled you to sleep but he couldn't sleep that easily, he kept thinking about what had just happened between you two and he didn't know if he was ready for all of this. Also he didn't need other people to tell him that he was a disgusting monster that had ruined lives, he knew his reality.

Next morning you woke up all alone again, ofcourse, you had to be at an audition so you got off your ass and got ready.

"How's your leg?" He asked Jolene as he entered his bedroom,

"It's fine..why?" She put her phone down and looked at him, she probably should apologize for last night, she came here to get him back and not lose him again. 

"Because I need you out of this apartment" he told her straight away, he didn't want to beat around the bush and make this more awkward than it already was. She definitely got offended by his tone. 

"Ohhhh you do huhh? Am I interrupting the privacy of the perverted love birds?" She smirked as she said that and it only irked him further 

"Well quite frankly..yes. You have no right to be here and judge us like this so pack your shit up and leave me alone like you did before, I'll drop you at the place, when that bastard is caught you can get back to NYC or wherever you want to be at except here" he raised his voice a little and her eyes welled up with tears. She was so stupid, he wasn't even hers for her to be so rude with him last night, why couldn't she control her jealousy?

"Wowww really? And I thought you cared about me but you never did.. Did you?  All you have ever cared about is that whore, makes sense that you abandoned everyone you loved for her" she spat at him and his jaw clenched in anger.

"Stop insulting her, you hear me? You don't fucking know anything about her" 

Her eyes teared up as he snapped at her, he didn't even wait for a response as he stormed out of the room. He was treating her with kindness because he hasn't been kind to her before but what she said to him last night had truly made him angry. He's also not going to allow a third person to come into his home, your home with him, and insult you like this again and again.

You couldn't have been happier about the prospect of her being out of your life. He dropped her off at the safe place and she got dramatic again. She hugged him and cried furiously but he didn't melt this time,

"Bye Jolene..See you never" you smiled at her and she gave you the death glare. After she was dealt with he took you to the audition.

"Talk to me please" you whispered softly to him as he was sitting right next to you while you waited for your turn to go in.  

"Just try to ace it, they saw your work at the set and are very impressed, you–" 

"Lokii" you cut him off mid sentence so he looked at you,

"Look y/n..I ..I just can't do this okay..what happened last night shall not happen again" your eyes teared up as he said that, you really had a hope that things would turn around for you both but he wasn't ready to take that step. 

"Finee..I get it" 

"What do you mean?" You shrugged as he questioned 

"I get it okay..it sucked, you didn't enjoy kissing me, or whatever–"

"That's not the reason –" 

"It's fine..I mean I get it..why would you want to stay stuck to me when you're so used to sleeping with all those beautiful women in the world" His eyes teared up as you said that "Oh btw which one you're going to take back home from here huh? The one in the black? She's your type right?" You spoke venomously, you didn't want to hurt him but you felt too hurt yourself to think rationally at the moment. They called your name so you got up and left him to think about the whole conversation.

The audition went well, you had to enact being heartbroken and it came real easy. On the way back home he didn't say anything and neither did you, this is the type of situations he didn't want to get involved in, one kiss and you both were already fighting like a couple, he felt anxious and afraid, he didn't want to lose you but now he was afraid this will be the final nail in the coffin.

He was able to keep you hooked through the sly manipulation before but even that felt evil now that he knew about your true feelings regarding him, you didn't just lust after him, he knew that now. He dropped you home, the cops were outside the apartment on the watch and he really needed some time away to get drunk and clear his head. 

He was drowning his sorrows with a drink when he heard the song playing in the background, it brought back some of the memories.

I know nobody knows

Where it comes and where it goes

I know it's everybody's sin

You got to lose to know how to win

 His mother used to play this at home, sometimes it felt like one when he and Thor were just kids and she wasn't as delusional as Odin was but with time Odin ruined everything and everyone.

His phone buzzed so he took it out of his pocket , it was a message from you 

His eyes teared up as he read the text so he put the phone back inside. He felt someone sitting next to him so he looked to the side, the woman gave him a smile and started a conversation with him, she was sexy and very much interested in him he could tell, pretty perfect distraction for his usual nights. 

 "So let's cut to the chase..are you taken handsome?" She whispered to him as her nails caressed through his cheek in a flirtatious manner. He grabbed her hand and she smiled at him but it faltered as he put her hand away from him. 

"Yes… yes I am" he chugged on his drink and stepped out of the bar to make his way back home. Home to you. 

💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚

Taglist: if I am not able to tag you please check your settings

@annoyingsweetsstranger  @whylokiissocute  @loki-s-wife  @fraoid3  @siggytumbles  @crzyplantladyvibes  @stupidthoughtsinwriting  @vickie5446  @wheredafandomat  @mcufan72  @xxntiimulti  @loz-3  @dishahaldar @mcdesij @scram1326  @elthreetimes  @army24--7  @sinsandguilt  @holotacopeely  @huntress-artemiss  @blog-the-lilly  @ultraviolencexxss @disneyismyworldforever  @bunny24sstuff  @kats72  @somewiseguy  @asgardianprincess1050  @multifandom-world8  @loki-laufeyson-1054

[chicagosfinest2021]

Doing another one of these because I don't feel like waiting for my followers to ask me nuthin LOL

0:Height Useless 5'3''

1:Virgin? No but I wish I was sometimes (even though virginity is a man-made social construct that has no bearing in reality)

2:Shoe size 9

3:Do you smoke? Just on the dance floor

4:Do you drink? Socially

5:Do you take drugs? Just my anti-baby pills!!

6:Age you get mistaken for mid 20's usually

7:Have tattoos? On this chocolate brown skin?? Nah baby

8:Want any tattoos? I'm good

9:Got any piercings? Just my ears right now

10:Want any piercings? If I can shrink my fupa down a bit I might get my navel done

11:Best friend? My sister

12:Relationship status Perpetually single at heart/by choice

13:Biggest turn ons Emotional maturity and introspection

14:Biggest turn offs Emotionally stunted people

15:Favorite movie Toss up between Queen, Bend It Like Beckham and Wakanda Forever

16:I’ll love you if You feed me food

17:Someone you miss My grandma </3

18:Most traumatic experience Being SA'ed by different men

19:A fact about your personality I'm just a straight up catch

20:What I hate most about myself I procrastinate too much, I also can't lose this belly meat for sh*t

21:What I love most about myself I'm smart, pretty, cultured, funny, and have an overall dope vibe

22:What I want to be when I get older The rich auntie with no kids that's always traveling and spoils her niblings with money and gifts

23:My relationship with my sibling(s) Me and my middle sister are basically twins and are super close, I have a half sister whom I love but she's not into the lovey-dovey stuff. She also didn't grow up with us so we're all still getting to know each other, but we're cool for the most part.

24:My relationship with my parent(s) They're not perfect but I'm both a mommy's girl and a daddy's girl

25:My idea of a perfect date It's been so long since I've been on a real date I can't even picture what a perfect date would look like to me at this point. I guess any situation where I'm not silently wishing I had stayed at home would be a step up to me.

26:My biggest pet peeves People who insist on bringing their kids everywhere and expect the general public to help them babysit. Also when I try to pay at the pump and they tell me I have to go pay inside. I'll just get back in my car and leave.

27:A description of the girl/boy I like This guy I'm currently in a situationship right now (not proud of it). He's Latino, we've known each other since we were 13, he's funny, very eloquent when he speaks, is a really good kisser, is kind of a fuckboi and is probably aware of it. . .

28:A description of the person I dislike the most Homophobic/transphobic people in general

29:A reason I’ve lied to a friend So she would stop asking me invasive questions

30:What I hate the most about work/school I actually really like my job, my pay is nice but it could always be better tho, nah mean?

31:What your last text message says My phone is charging right now but I was texting someone about details for brunch tomorrow

32:What words upset me the most "Item is no longer in stock"

33:What words make me feel the best about myself "You just have such a deep and passionate soul"

34:What I find attractive in women Everything, women as a rule are sexy AF

35:What I find attractive in men Security in who they are and what they're about so they don't constantly feel the need to dominate or be "submitted to".

36:Where I would like to live Ireland or England

37:One of my insecurities My big boobs, I feel like people oversexualize me because that's all they see

38:My childhood career choice I wanted to play piano but then I wanted to be a writer

39:My favorite ice cream flavor I want it to be rum raisin

40:Who wish I could be I don't want to be anyone but me honestly

41:Where I want to be right now Underneath my situationship pinned to the bed

42:The last thing I ate This casserole I made that was bangin

43:Sexiest person that comes to my mind immediately Alex Livinalli

44:A random fact about anything Queen Nefertiti was the stepmother of King Tut

[aurathian]

things that have stuck with me as a woc in (the zelda) fandom

Hey all. This post is mostly about the Gerudo and my own experiences in fandom as a Middle Eastern woman (will be using acronyms such as MENA and woc), because the longer I stay here the more insane I become. This post is mostly about a lot of horrible stereotyping, misogynistic, racist, etc. headcanons, and just downright horribly offensive comments I've witnessed that have stuck with me throughout my time here.

There are a lot of other problems in this fandom with a lot of other aspects of the games (the Zonai...) which I won't touch on, as the Gerudo resonate closest with me and I feel I have the authority to speak on these issues as I am MENA, and they are based on MENA stereotypes.

TW for racism, misogyny, xenophobia, abortion... it's just strange.

The most notable thing I've experienced during my time in this fandom is being spoken over, as a woc talking about woc issues, by white people. White people who were MY FRIENDS.

One instance that sticks out to me is when someone shared their art of Urbosa in a Zelda server. It was really sexualized, and her waist was EXTREMELY tiny. Below the art, the artist said, "her waist is snatched because she got an abortion." She didn't say this about the other characters she drew. Only the woc.

Do I need to elaborate on why that is a horrible, disgusting thing to say?

This really upset me. What upset me more, however, was that nobody spoke up. Nobody said hey, this is wrong, and what you said is gross. When I spoke about this with my friends, they continued to bash the art style or whatever and ignore the fact that what was said was disgustingly racist. Then, after repeating about 5 separate times the impact this had on me as a woc (because nobody was listening to me and the most action that was taken was hug emojis), I got asked: Are you MENA?

They chose to ignore the racism they were witnessing and then questioned my (already stated) credibility. To question my capacity to be upset, hurt, and angry. These were people I called friends.

This next instance was not me being spoken over, but it was... weird. In a Zelda server, someone shared their headcanons for their personal AU. One of these headcanons was:

The Gerudo stop aging until they meet their significant other.

The Gerudo stop aging until they meet their significant other.

This was to justify the person's pedophilic ship with Riju, which... yeah. Self explanatory. So not only that, but you are tying the life and worth of WOC to their partners which, in-game, are men. The Gerudo do not continue their lives until they met their partners. The woc do not continue their lives until they meet their partners.

Be real.

This person ended up getting called out (after MUCH convincing from me to do so...).

These are two specific instances that have stuck with me during my time in fandom, but now I'll touch on more general stuff.

The only way people speak about Urbosa or other Gerudo characters is sexually or violently. It seems we only have the capacity to say "yes mommy Urbosa step on me! Crush my bones!! Yes!!" which is actually extremely harmful. You can like the Gerudo. You can think they're sexy or hot. But you need to be more mindful about how you speak about them, because if the only way you can express your feelings about these woc is through acts of violence, that is a problem. Because you cannot see the Gerudo as characters beyond being man-hating lesbians to satisfy your own fetishes. By acting this way, you also contribute to the idea that Gerudo women cannot be feminine because they are brown-skinned. No other race in Zelda is spoken about this way.

The Gerudo are often attached to other characters, as mentioned previously. I think this is most commonly and easily seen with Urbosa. Whenever she is discussed, it is in relation to Zelda (mother-daughter relationship) or Zelda's mother (having an affair or whatever other headcanons there may be). It is rare that Urbosa is written on her own, outside of her relationships. Not like she has an entire society to run or anything.

Let's also not forget about the sexualization of Link in his Gerudo vai outfit. Yes, it's cute. Yes, it looks good on him. But so many of you borderline fetishize him wearing it. However, I don't think I know enough to speak on this specific issue, so I will stop there with that.

I will never forget the time I came across a post saying that the existence of Ashai, a pale Gerudo, is racist.

Here is Ashai. She teaches the dating lessons in Gerudo Town. As you can see, she is paler than a lot of the Gerudo.

However, contrary to the westernized belief that all Middle Eastern people are literally brown-skinned Muslims, the Middle East is extremely diverse. Middle Eastern people are pale, dark, brown, tall, short, Muslim, Christian, Jewish. We are not carbon copies of each other like this poster wanted the Gerudo to be. In fact, this same exact identical-ness is what made early versions of the Gerudo so racist. The one thing Nintendo did right was having a diverse range of skin tones for the Gerudo in BOTW, and by saying Ashai's existence as a pale Gerudo is racist, you erase all of that progress.

Race is not just in your skin tone. It's in your eyes, your nose, your mouth, your ears, your body. That is why, despite being pale, Ashai is Gerudo. Ashai is a WOC.

This post is not intended to stir up drama, because if you believe racism = drama, that is not on the poc calling it out.

If you are a white person who is friends with POC, this doesn't make you exempt from contributing to the harmful stereotypes or racism.

Sit down. Listen. And reflect.

[sevmch]

hq boys as dads calling you while you're away bc your child wouldn't stop crying

characters: kuroo tetsuro, bokuto koutarou

warning(s): none, just fluff. kuroo is v father material aahh!!

a/n: this was sitting on my drafts for a while now. other characters coming soon 👀

kuroo tetsuro

you were overseas for two days to attend a convention that your job required which meant leaving kuroo and your child

kuroo was admittedly and without a doubt, a really good father so when he told you not to worry about them, you left without any worries at all

kuroo knew everything - how to prepare milk and baby food, changing diapers, how to get them to sleep, how to stop their tantrums, basically everything

still you bugged him all the way to the airport to call if something were to happen or if he needed help with anything such as locating the diaper and milk powder

afterall, he was rarely on baby duty since his job required more of his time compared to yours but he has never failed to provide you and his son the time and affection

the first day went by smoothly and without a problem, that is until the next day. your son just wouldn't stop crying so he had to call you to calm him down

no matter what kuroo did, your son just wouldn't stop crying even when he was cradling him gently in his arms and rubbing his back. their child has been crying for almost an hour now, only getting louder and stronger despite his best efforts to calmly shush him or lull him to sleep.

the morning went by pretty fine; kuroo fed, bathed, and played with their son - even changed the diapers twice. their son seemed to be in a pretty good mood throughout the morning but apparently, babies get mood swings too, and that's when the crying started.

kuroo tried basically everything from trying to get their son to drink milk, to giving the pacifier, and humming baby songs he could think of but all his attempts failed. their son wasn't bored nor hungry and was definitely not sleepy so it was starting to worry kuroo.

"hey bud, you're scaring me now," kuroo cooed, softly pressing the back of his hand against their son's forehead but the temperature was fine. kuroo knew all the baby stuff without sweat, even the signals of what they needed but this was entirely different. it was only when then their son pointed to the picture of the three of you framed on the wall that kuroo got his answer. pressing a soft kiss against his son's temple, he whispered softly, "i know bud, i miss mommy too."

kuroo grabbed his phone from the couch and called you, chuckling when you instantly answered on the first ring with a hint of worry in your voice. "tetsu, what's wrong? are you both okay? should i get on the next flight?"

"relax kitten, we're fine. we just miss you."

"awe, i miss both my boys too."

"mama's on the phone bud." kuroo switched to loud speaker, smiling widely at their son who looked at him with wide, doe eyes upon hearing your voice. the crying eventually died down as you kept speaking through the phone with your cute, tiny baby voice until your son fell asleep in his arms.

"is he asleep?" you asked.

"yep. hey, you should use that baby voice often. it's cute," he teased, grinning ear to ear.

"shut up."

the rest of the afternoon was spent at a mall near the airport, buying toys and new clothes and stopping by for ice cream before waiting for you at the terminal.

"look bud, there's mommy!" kuroo crouched to level with their son, pointing at your figure from a distance. their son's eyes lit up when spotting you, giggling and reaching out his other hand that kuroo wasn't holding.

"awe, it's my two favorite boys! i missed you both so much!" you said sweetly, dropping your bags to hug your son.

"i missed you so much, love." you hugged kuroo tightly when he stood up only for him to hug you tighter, peppering kisses on your cheeks.

"missed you more, kitten," he said softly, pressing a light kiss to your lips before carrying your son. you really had nothing to worry about.

bokuto kotarou

you were a little bit worried about leaving bokuto and your child even if it was just for a couple of hours. you had to visit your parents in kyoto and dropby for groceries on the way home

it's not that you didn't trust him, you were just not quite sure if the house would be exactly the same as when you left knowing how bokuto and your child loved to play A LOT

you considered calling akaashi to babysit the two lmao

bokuto matched your child's energy so while you're incharge of all the serious baby duties, bokuto was incharge of playing and goofing around with your child while you rested

really, your child got their hyperactiveness from bo

you were also the one who dealt with the tantrums while bo assisted, so when bo was left to deal with your son's tantrum alone, he panicked and was about to cry himself because your son was crying and it made him sad :(

you left the house around 6 am after preparing breakfast for your husband and son as well as the other things that bokuto will need for the day. althought bokuto spent a lot of time with your child, it didn't always include the serious baby duties so you knew for sure if you hadn't displayed the diapers and vitamins on the counter in advance, he'd be flipping the house upside down searching for them.

you also left a note on the fridge that consisted of all the instructions and reminders to serve as a guide. you trusted bokuto, of course, but you really just didn't want to come home to a mess.

bokuto's arms snaked around your waist and squeezed you lightly in his hug, nuzzling his face at the crook of your neck. "can't you just take us with you?"

"i'd love to kou, but our son just recovered from a fever so it's best if he stays home for now."

he nodded, visibly frowning. you cupped his cheek to get him to look at you. "kou, baby, i'll be back before you know it."

bokuto pouted, looking at you with puppy dog eyes and it took everything in you not to cancel your plans. "call me if there's a problem, okay?" you kissed him goodbye and left.

with the note you left him, bokuto had no troubles throughout the morning routine even during bathtime. he would send you pictures and videos from time to time so you wouldn't have to worry, also because he loved sharing things with you.

bokuto loved playing with your son, loved seeing the adorable smile and hearing the soft giggles during their playtime even if it meant having to crawl on the carpet with his son on his back like a horse.

bokuto was filming him walking around with a huge smile on his face, "come to dada, little guy." your son just recently learned how to walk on their own so their steps were still unstable and wobbly and this resulted to your son tripping on his own feet.

bokuto could shit his pants right now, quickly fumbling to his now crying son to comfort him.

"hey little guy, it's okay you're good, dada's here now." he's whispering comforting words while gently rubbing on their back but the cries only got worse, the tears streaming down the little guy's face nonstop and this made bokuto's heart sink, feeling his own tears pool in his eyes. "shh i'm sorry, i'm sorry... you're okay, i gotchu."

his hands hesitantly reached out hug your son, so fragile it scared bokuto. he was calling you now and thank god you answered right away.

"kou?"

"he won't stop crying and i don't know what to do, can you come home now please? i think i just made our son hate me."

you sighed, "he doesn't hate you, kou. can you tell me what happened?"

"i was taking a video of him while he walked around but then he tripped and i swear i was watching over him! he won't stop crying, oh god i'm gonna cry too."

"did he hit his head? is he seriously hurt anywhere?"

"no," bokuto mumbled and you sighed in relief.

"okay that's good. it'll be fine babe, kids fall sometimes, okay? especially at this stage where they're learning how to walk. just carry him around for a while and he'll eventually ca-"

"what if i drop him?! should i ask akaashi to come over??" he pressed the phone between his ear and shoulder, gently and carefully lifting his son from the ground, pressing him close to his chest despite being nervous.

"you won't drop him kou, i'll punch you if you do, and no, do not call keiji. you got this, babe, you're his dad and he needs you not his uncle."

it took a while to convince bokuto that he was going to be find and to get off the phone so he can start comforting your son. bokuto did as you said, cradling him in his arms while he walked around the house and pointing to the pictures on the wall until your son finally calmed down. the only problem was that his son would start crying again whenever he attempted to bring him down, tiny hands clinging around his neck and onto his shirt.

you arrived home around 8 pm, announcing your arrival only to be met with silence at the door.

"kou?"

your eyes softened as soon as you found him asleep on the couch with your son on top of his chest, his strong arms wrapped securely around the tiny human being. you quietly kneel beside the couch, stroking bokuto's hair which slowly woke him up.

"i'm home." you smiled.

bokuto brought a finger to his lips and you pressed your lips together, taking your son away from his arms so you can tuck him in for the night.

"i'm sooo tired," bokuto whined, resting his head on top of your chest and cuddling close to you as soon as you joined him in bed. "it's my turn to be baby."

you snorted, bokuto's soft snores filling the quiet room in just a few seconds. "goodnight baby."

reblogs & feedbacks r appreciated<3

2021 (c) sevmch | do not copy or repost.

[bumblesimagines]

Green Thumb

Part 19

Request: Yes or No

In the last few chaps two years have passed, in this one three have passed so the five year gap is overrrr. Endgame is three goddamn hours longgg. I'm sorry this one feels short. I just hate doing more than one or two timeskips

~

"I'll visit soon, Sarah. Tell the boys I said hi, alright?" You smiled softly, saying bye to Sarah before hanging up. You sighed softly, putting your phone down. You buried your face in your hands, sighing heavily. You heard your phone buzz, looking at the text on screen.

Starks Bitch Ass

You still coming for dinner?

You picked up the phone, going to answer Tony before you got another text. You furrowed your brows, clicking on it.

Nat

I need your help

(Y/N)

With?

Nat

You know

You frowned, gaze lifting to the picture of the Barton family, your family. You sighed again, eyes shutting briefly. The last time you had seen Clint had been three years ago.

Nat

And also with Stark

Nat

We're outside

You scoffed, standing up and walking to the front door. You watched the car stop, dust and dirt flying up behind it. You went down the steps, approaching the car. You saw Steve driving, Natasha in the passenger seat.

"How you been, (Y/N)?" Steve asked, unlocking the doors.

"Shitty." You got in the back, glancing at Scott.

"I thought you were dead."

"I thought you were like fifteen last time I saw you." Scott replied, looking you over. You cocked a brow, putting on a seatbelt.

"So.. What do you need me for?" You asked, brows furrowing.

"Convincing Tony of time travel." Natasha answered as Steve began to drive. You stared at her, confusion evident in her face. Scott noticed, clearing his throat.

"Okay, so-"

"If it has to do with science or math, I don't want to hear about it. I'll only get a headache." You waved him off, leaning back against the seat and shutting your eyes. You took a nap on the drive, waking up when the car came to a stop. You yawned, getting out of the car and walking towards the the lodge.

"Momo!" You called, smiling softly. Morgan's eyes lit up, wiggling in her dads grip. Tony set her down, watching her quickly run over to you. You chuckled, picking her up.

"Hey, Momo. Missed me?" You asked with a gentle smile. Tony turned and headed into the lodge.

"We didn't get to finish our story." Morgan said, pouting. You chuckled, watching Tony bring out a tray with drinks. The others stood at the porch, explaining their idea to Tony.

"And you came along because..?" Tony turned to look at you after you convinced Morgan to head inside while the adults talked. You took a seat, shrugging lightly.

"Had nothing better to do." You replied. You slightly spaced out as they spoke about science stuff, taking the drink Tony offered. You looked at the nature around the area, eyes squinting slightly.

"Are you gonna entertain this, (Y/N)?" Tony questioned, turning to look at you. You looked back at him.

"Wouldn't hurt to try, Tony." You said softly. Tony stayed silent, sighing through his nose. He turned his head when Morgan came running out of the lodge, climbing onto her dads lap.

"Mommy said to come save you." Morgan said. Tony held her, standing up as he looked at everyone. His gaze settled on you.

"Will you be joining us for dinner?" He asked, brows raising slightly. You licked your lips.

"Yeah, I suppose so." You nodded, standing up and smiling softly at Morgan. Tony nodded, walking inside. You looked at Natasha.

"Let me know when you find out where he is." You told her. Natasha understood, nodding. You followed Tony into the lodge.

"Tony-"

"You were brought along to convince me. I knew it." Tony set Morgan down, facing you with his hands on his hips. You gave a small nod.

"Yeah, I was. I wanted to see you as well. Nat wants to find Clint." You told him gently. Tonys' gaze softened, nodding. He had Morgan go to Pepper before sitting down on the couch.

"You ready?" He asked gently. You sat on the couch, grabbing a pillow a gently hugging it. You stayed silent, staring at the floor.

"I don't know. I.. I don't know if I'll punch him or scream at him when I see his face."

"I wouldn't blame you. I'll punch him next time I see him."

"Tony." You shot him a look, raising your brows. Tony shrugged, leaning back in the couch. You watched him, shifted and sitting criss cross.

"So, the.. Time heist-"

"Is the stupidest idea I've ever heard."

"Can you at least give it a try? Stop being a Negative Nancy, that's my job." You gently kicked his leg.

"If his theory even works.. Who's to say we can snap them back? What if we make things worse? Make that fifty percent into twenty percent?" Tony questioned. You could understand his concerns. He had a kid to worry about.

"I know, Tony.. Could you at least.. Think it over? Do some small tests?" You asked softly. Tony stayed silent, thinking it over. He took in a deep breath, rolling his eyes when he noticed your puppy eyes.

"Fine! Fine, I'll have F.R.I.D.A.Y run over some tests after dinner."

"Thank you."

~~~~~~~~~~

"You think you're up to this?" Natasha asked softly as the jet neared Tokyo. You nodded, watching the city lights come into view.

"Yeah, of course." You replied softly, slight nerves bubbling in your stomach. Natasha gently grabbed your hand, giving it a light squeeze. You gave her a small smile. Natasha landed the jet in an empty parking lot, getting out. Natasha took out an umbrella, wrapping an arm around you to keep you under it. You and Natasha followed the sound of gunshots, hearing them ease. You slowed down, watching Clint kill a man. You swallowed.

"You shouldn't be here." Clint said. Hearing his voice made your jaw clench.

"Neither should you." Natasha replied, watching him. Clint turned to face you and Natasha, features hard. His gaze softened when he saw you before he looked away.

"I have a job to do." Clint said, the water dripping down his face. You scoffed softly, stepping out from under the umbrella. You didn't mind the rain as you walked towards him. Clint looked at him, lips parting to speak but you didn't let him, slapping him as hard as you could. Clint stumbled back, fingers brushing over his reddening cheek.

"You had a job. You were supposed to be my dad! You left me to do what? Kill some guys?! I was drowning in my own fucking grief and where were you, Clint?! You missed out on 5 years of my life. Five years you'll never get back. How could you call yourself my dad and then abandon me when shit gets hard? I lost Laura too. I lost Lila, Nathaniel, and Cooper too. Then, I lost you and you left by choice." You stared at him, vision blurry. The tears mixed with the rain.

"Tony fucking Stark was there for me when you weren't. The selfish asshole himself.. Was a better father figure than you were." You breathed out, sniffling.

"(Y/N)-"

"These men dying won't change shit but what we're trying to do might. If not for me, do it for the kids. For a chance of seeing them again." You stared at him. The old feeling of safety you used to get from him had disappeared.

"There's a chance we can get them back. If we do... Things won't go back to normal. You easily abandoned me and I can't forgive that. I'll never forgive that. For three fucking years.. You never bothered getting in contact, never bothered checking in, never bothered being a father. You wouldn't have left if I was Cooper. You wouldn't have left if I was Lila. You proved it." You took in a deep breath.

"I was in pain-"

"And I wasn't?!" You snapped, chest heaving. You noticed you didn't feel the rain anymore, seeing that the rain drops had stopped mid air. You took in a deep breath like Tony had taught you, feeling the rain resume before it eventually eased and stopped completely.

"Are you gonna help the team?" You asked, studying his face. Clint gave a silent nod, gaze flickering back to Natasha. You turned around, opening your palm and feeling the water on your clothes and body move towards your hand. The water mixed together, making a large water bubble. You let it drop to the ground as you walked back towards the jet. You entered, getting in the pilots seat and buckling in. You were incredibly angry but you didn't want to accidentally cause a tsunami so you focused on your breathing. You set the course as Clint and Natasha quietly spoke. You stared at the night sky, watching the clouds pass by. You called Steve, watching the blue screen pop up with his face

"We got Clint, Cap. We're heading back now."

"Copy that." Steve replied, nodding before his gaze shifted onto the two behind you.

"How have you been, Clint?" Steve asked.

"Never better." Clint answered, sighing softly. You frowned, focusing on the clouds as the jet flew back to the facility. Steve and Clint caught up until Steve hung up, leaving the jet in silence.

"Did Bruce have any luck with Thor?" You asked, glancing back at Natasha. Natasha nodded, gently toying with her braid.

"Yeah, he mentioned it was a bit tough to see him. Thor wasn't himself." Natasha stood, approaching the front and placing a hand on the chair. You hummed softly. You felt your phone vibrate, taking it out and seeing Peppers contact. You answered the call.

"Yeah?"

"Morgan wants you to tell her a bed time story. She's sad you didn't have time the other day." Pepper explained in a slightly apologetic tone. You smiled, chuckling softly.

"Yeah, okay."

"(Y/N)?" You heard Morgan's soft voice, immediately feeling relaxed.

"Hey, Momo." You cooed, making sure the jet was on auto pilot before you leaned back in your seat.

"What story do you want today?"

[mynameisaboutlight]

hey there,

i think i'd like to kiss your neck but uhm... u would never like it. i mean pfft im like a 5 year old cute kid... im not sexy, i don't have that body u like, nor the confidence. im just me with no purpose in life. n u wouldn't be interested in me. cuz uhm, ur obviously so into the hot happier ones. so i guess i gotta kill myself so fast, huh? cuz i cannot live with the fact that i cannot be loved. cowardly, yeah but honestly i don't give a fuck abt that one problem if im ever gonna suicide (feelings would cease) ... i ain't gonna linger or stuff. like fuck, this kid hate themselves. it's true but what's so fake abt it? i don't feel real. i don't sense things. i don't really like being intimidated. i don't like bullies. oh heck yeah i have tons of insecurities. i feel like im the loneliest n i cant help but be lonely. cuz um.. me... being so quiet... so.. im scared... n plus... social anxiety... traumatised... past?... my dad when he beat me up... my mother when she watched all that but didn't step up and save her daughter... my classmates when they... um... called me fckn ugly and cyber bullied me... do i think that's real? like, any of this?.. do i... um... have the right... to like... uh... vent ? ... or say that i been in great pain... and that i think nobody would fucking listen to me or believe me?.. does it really matter? i don't think so... but i heard that it's our responsibility, we, "the broken ones" to fix our brokenness and to reverse the irreversible damage that costed us so many friends, so many opportunities. how is that fckn fair? and we're not allowed to be loved unless we got a healthy amount of love to ourselves. n yeah ppl sit n say "oh sorry" but they don't really care. n why should they? n I've already stopped depending on ppl and expecting them to wait for me or to be my friends. cuz im too damaged, i wouldn't have said a thing. oh well i see friends, cool girls, tough boys, daily calling their mommies, feeling happy, saying "i love you" and "i miss you" and i guess it's why i can't live. cuz i don't have a healthy relationship with ma moma. ppl... ppl be calling me cute n wanting to hit me n throw me around at the same time. like is that really how u show love? by being so violent? n my boy buds be bullying me as a joke cuz they don't know im sensitive. they really dunno that i have terrible anxiety and that i could burst into tears without a warning. but do they like me? just for my face i guess. or for they like being around me? but asking them would be hella embarrassing. n my buds don't know that they trigger me whenever they say they wanna hit me jokingly or out of admiration. like fine bro I'd be laughing with ya on that if i really hadn't issues. I'm so stupid sometimes also, abt trivial silly things. like a retarded man. and i ain't no retarded, i just cry every night, my brain be shrinking from strain. u could say i have 4 brain cells, if that makes sense. n i love my buddies but i don't think any one of them actually notice me. like im there but im not. i was never there. i love em. n i like how they be but i don't think anyone has ever seen me. they just pass by me. they smile at me but they don't wanna hang around me. isn't that sad? hehe. ppl really be reading other sad ppl's diaries on the net, don't they?

[synesindri]

Oooh yes 🧂 6, 11, 21, and a special wildcard of your choosing if you think there's one that would amuse me personally but that I didn't ask for >:)

hi hi hi!

6. Has fandom ever made you enjoy a pairing you previously hated?

previously hated is strong; i usually don't get to the point of hating (non-canon) ships...i did used to be like "what is even the point of sastiel" for a while but i have definitely turned around on that

11. Is there an unpopular character you like that the fandom doesn’t? Why?

answered here! i have more though lol. i also really like henriksen; idk if he's really unpopular in the sense of being disliked, but he's not really a fandom hot topic even though every episode he's in is a blast to me. i am SO intrigued by lilith and why she's Like That; her vaguely implied dynamic with lucifer is something i can and do speculate on frequently with the cloth mommy satan stuff etc. ALSO ZACHARIAH i love zachariah, i would be right there with him in that bar telling him his office au was fun and commiserating about how much his job sucks lmaooo

21. What are your thoughts on crack ships?

dude i am out here shipping crowley and gabriel; i LOVE a crack ship. although part of what is fun to me about them is trying to figure out how to make them make sense, which kind of removes the crack-ness i guess...i just love to test my limits with coming up with deranged theories from deranged starting points. idk. idk! it's fun

wild card: 19. What is the one thing you hate most about your fandom?

ok this is salty salty but it is related to one of your answers to this meme, so. typically when i leave fandoms it's because my interest has drifted rather than because i've become embittered, but i came very close to just dropping spn out of annoyance about a half a year ago because of how the fandom can be about (arch)angel/(arch)angel pairings...i kept running into really aggressively black-and-white takes about that while i was actively trying to plan a sabrifer fic that i ended up not writing, and i took a step back to reflect on my reaction to that and was like "man why am i even here if it's gonna be like this." luckily i got over that but like! jeez! (as ever, everyone is entitled to their individual thoughts on how angels relate to each other and their comfort levels with shipping them together, but discussions that are like "you're obviously a bad person if you ship them"...just...stop)

salty fandom asks

[yanderecandystore]

Aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh

I came back from the deepest pit of Hell, and came with some gay shit-

I hope you enjoy 🐑🍫♥️👀😋

Warnings:

•The incarnation of Be gay, do crimes.

•That's it.

•And also sketch at the end.

🍭꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍰꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖🍭

Good looking guys are the worst. [Yandere bullies x M!Reader x Yandere M! Delinquent]

Running after school ended up becoming routine at this point.

You can't help but feel exhausted every time you do.

You run for your dear life every time you know they're coming with their friends to beat the shit out off you.

Bastards can't even do their dirty job themselves, they need to call their besties to do it for them. Well, sucks to be them, you aren't giving up own coming back home without a scratch.

Your mom can't know this type of stuff is happening to you at school. Your parents payed for you to enter in that damn school, and you are not going to make their hard work be for nothing.

"- Come back here, [Y/N]!!" Alexandra yells at the top of her lungs. For a pretty daddy's little girl, she makes you feel way more scared than her brother. And her brother, Adrien, is bad enough as he is.

You can't tell if Adrien hates you or if he is obsessed over you, he likes to beat you up but at the same time he can't leave you alone. But hey, who cares? You're fucked either way.

They're getting too close to you. You thought that running towards the more dark areas of town would save your ass, but since it has been a week that they haven't used you as their stress toy, they're pretty pissed.

Actually, you're stuck in a paradox right now.

If they catch you, you're dead.

If they don't catch you today, they're going to make sure to be more violent whenever they can catch you, and then you're dead.

Like a snowball effect. Of death.

Oh, you probably shouldn't be thinking about the "what if's" of if they catch you, you should be thinking about running!

"- Aaaahhhh- fuck!" After entering alley after alley, you meet your worst nightmare, a dead end.

You can hear them coming near, you decide to hide, maybe your zigzagging made them lose you.

You hide behind some garbage. You feel at home.

Your heart beats are on your ears now. You can only hear your hitched breathing and uncontrollable heart beats. You try to calm yourself down.

"- Goddammit."

"- Where is he?"

You can hear them.

You can hear them looking around the dead end, and them walking away.

And then, you can't hear them anymore.

'Am I safe?'

You decide to come out of your hiding spot after some minutes.

Terrible idea, honestly. You should had left them go completely away.

You get out of the dead end, when-

"- Hey, you!"

A raspy male voice yells. You aren't familiar with this voice. You can't be sure if it's talking with you. You just froze in fear that it could be one of the Coldwell twin's friends.

"- Look at me when I'm talking to you, idiot."

Damn, rude. You turn around and see a couple of boys wearing a school uniform. Is different than yours.

"- The fuck you doing around here?" You look at each of the boys, each one is buff and seems ready to break you. But the one who is talking with you, is honestly not that intimidating.

He is handsome. But, he doesn't strike you as a delinquent. He has reddish brown hair and brown eyes.

"- Answer me, rich boy. What are you doing here? We thought we told you fucks to stop showing your faces around here." Oh, okay, this situation is starting to become worst and worst every second.

Firstly, they have baseball bats and crowbars and pipes as weapons. The twins would only beat you until you were unconscious.

This guys will either kill you or break your bones.

Secondly, he is yelling at you. At any minute now, the twins and their friends will come back to see what's happening.

"- Look, this has to be a misunderstanding- I-I'm not here to fight!" You're here to get the fuck out!

"- Awn, did you get lost?"

"- Must be pretty bad not having mommy and daddy to pick you up."

"- Will they miss their spoiled little brat?"

Some of the boys taunt you. Laughing in the process.

They keep mentioning something about you being a rich kid. Maybe is because of your uniform?

Most kids that go to Amaryllis Academy come from rich families. And although your parents paid for your education at the academy, you're nowhere near as wealthy as the other students. Pretty much the contrary.

"- I'm, I'm not-" You try to come up with something. Something to explain why you're here, and why they shouldn't break you down.

Nothing comes up.

"- What's your name?" Says the brown haired boy. Ignoring his friends comments about you.

"- [Y/N]." You say timidly as the boy starts to walk towards you. You give one step back and he comes faster, making you too scared of running away.

He is in front of you. Staring at your eyes.

"- So, what are you-" He was about to ask something, when someone comes in screaming your name.

"- [Y/N]!!! There you-" Adrien was caught off when he saw the boy and the other guys surrounding you. Alexandra face screams surprise and disgust.

"- …"

Both parties look at each other. Silent treats are being made just with stares. You're so glad you don't know what the fuck is going on.

The tension in the alley grows immensely. Everyone is silent for a solid minute before the boy on your side says something.

"- Would you look at that, our pretty boy brought to us some friends." He says while he wrap his arm around your shoulder. You can tell he is trying to piss the twins and is working.

"- Evening, Jack. Didn't notice we were in the sewers until I saw you rats." Both twins cross their arms. Honestly, if you could move, you would use their little conversation as a distraction and go home.

"- Yeah, if you don't like it here, why am I'm seeing your ugly faces?" Says the boy on your shoulder, apparently named Jack. You start to feel a little embarrassed about his arm around you. You aren't in the discussion, yet you're in-between them.

"- Because you have eyes."

"- And clearly you lack them, since you're in our territory, schmuck."

They keep going on, and honestly you don't care about any past relationships your bullies have with this guy, you just, really want to go home and take a bath. You honestly stopped paying attention at a certain point. You can only hear yelling and stuff.

You zoomed out for a bit, until you feel something harshly press itself own your face.

Oh, the whole alley went silent. Everyone looks shocked, well, except for Jack who is grinning at the twins, and one of his friends who has the biggest smile you can think of.

And then you noticed what actually happened, Jack had successfully kissed your cheek. You aren't exactly happy with that, but hey, the twins look pissed.

That's a win!

"- How about this?" Jack says smugly towards them.

They're furious, you don't know what just happened, but they ended giving up on beating you up.

And by that, they decided they wanted to beat the shit out off Jack.

Their friends are holding them so they can't actually do it. Bummer, you wanted to see them fight.

Apparently they can't start a fight with this guys right here, because that would start an even bigger fight between schools, but you don't care, this is great!

If you keep Jack by your side, they can't do anything!!

"- Get out of my face." Jack says, and the twins go away. They're going to kill you for not coming with them, but going to do worse with Jack for protecting your ass. It'll be worth it.

You start to walk towards the direction of your home, and you thank Jack, thinking that nothing bad will happen.

And of course.

Something bad happened.

"- Hey, where the hell are you going?"

"- Uhn, home?" You answer a little confused, after all, they didn't want you to be there in the first place.

"- What, just like that? I think you don't know how things work around here."

He stand his hand towards you. Oh, money? Is that what he wants for helping you out?

You pick whatever you got on your pocket, 3 bucks, and put in his hand.

"- Sigh.." He sighs, and then grabs your wrist and pulls you closer, making you stare at his eyes.

"- …." He is thinking about his next words. And you're thinking about how much better would it be if you just when home earlier!

"- I'll see you tomorrow." He whispers in your ear so that his friends don't hear (bitch, they already know-). He is not asking, he is commending you to come back here.

Well, at least he didn't take the money. You managed to come home safe and sound.

"- And that's gentlemen, why the cute ones are the worst." Jack says, lighting a cigarette with his buddies against the wall. Annoyed at the thoughts of seeing you again. Thoughts that can't go away.

꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍰꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍰꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍰꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡

🍭꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍰꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖🍭

[xxisxxisxxis]

Gateway Drug | Part Seventy-Four [Pt. 1]

Words: 3k

Warning(s): explicit language, drug abuse

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I exhale, turning to look at Nikki where he's laying beside me, a sickly pale tone to his skin, his black hair tangled, his hand that is clinging to mine, covered in tracks, the same appearance as his other hand. 

I can't help but wonder if I bathed him if he'd wake up. He reeks, and he's rough looking, only adding to my guilt. 

Fred gave him a sleeping pill to ease him off of his coke high--he's been freebasing again, just cooking it up in the room's microwave. 

I don't know what the hell to do about him. 

I wish I did. 

Turning over to face him, I brush his bangs out of his eyes, my fingertips lightly dusting over his cheeks, dark circles under his eyes. 

They were supposed to play tonight, but said Nikki came down with the flu and added the show to the second round of U.S. tours lined up for early next year. 

The Nikki I knew would have never put drugs over his music, his fans, and especially not his relationship. 

But, the Nikki I knew also wouldn't have cheated on me…

It's been hard to accept the fact that the Nikki I fell in love with six years ago, isn't around anymore. 

1981

I finish getting my church dress back on, grinning at Nikki as he gets his pants laced back up, the both of us glancing at each other in the back of my car. 

"What's mommy and daddy gonna say when I send their girl back home all turned out?" He asks me, smugly, and I put my heels back on, scoffing. 

"Gee, just come home with me and find out." I shrug. 

"I'll pass." He mumbles, pulling his shirt over his head. 

"Oh, c'mon, I'm sure they'd love you." I nudge him with my elbow. 

"Your mom would piss her granny-panties." He argues, wrinkling his nose a little and I just blink at him. 

"Maybe...but I'm pretty sure my dad would like you." I inform him. 

"Like hell he does." He says to himself and I just let out a breath. 

"So…" I say after a few seconds of silence and he nods a little, awkward tension filling the air around us. 

"...Well." He lets out in the same tone. 

"Good freaking night." I go to open the car door, irritated that he doesn't offer up to hangout and do stuff other than fool around, slamming the door shut.

"Hey, what's up?" He asks me, getting out next, standing by the driver's door, blocking my way. 

"Nothing. I'll see you later." I mumble, nudging him out of my way, opening my door but he's quickly shutting it before I can. 

"Viv, what's--" 

"--I'm gonna start charging you to sleep with me." I state blatantly and his hazel eyes widen, a shit eating smirk on his lips as he chuckles out, "what?" 

"You'd think since we have sex with each other so often it'd at least make us friends, but all you wanna do when we hangout is screw around and then go do whatever with the guys." I tell him. "And, no, this isn't me being a 'typical girl' and developing feelings for you just because we've had sex. It's me being tired of feeling like I'm just being used to get you off." 

"I'm being used to get you off so it's a win-win, is it not?" 

"You sound like Vince." I snap. "All that's happening is I screw you, you screw me, we leave, and don't talk until we're both horny again." 

"Is that not how this works?" 

"The least we can do is get food afterwards or something." I suggest. 

"...Like a date?" 

I gag at the thought. 

"Ew, no." I tell him and he looks confused. "Like, um...I don't know. But since I don't hate you enough to not hook up with you, anymore, I think we could at least get to know who we're hooking up with a little better."

"Friends with benefits?" He clarifies. 

"No, no, we're not friends." I point out and he let me get in my car. 

"I'll see you tomorrow night?" He throws out and I nod. "Wear something pretty--we're going to McDonald's." He smugly smiles and I roll my eyes, holding back a laugh. 

I'm shaking the memory away when there's a knock at the door and I slowly get out of bed, trying not to wake Nikki, slipping my hand from his as my feet hit the hotel carpet. 

I open the door, seeing Mick.

"They wanted us to go ahead and start getting our stuff together to leave." He informs me. "Apparently Guns has some solo shows at some clubs nearby so they're staying behind and we'll back up with them tomorrow night." He informs me and I nod, smiling softly, before he lets out a small breath. "I know you're hurt, and you've got every right to be, but would it not make more sense to file for divorce before you move on, as opposed to moving on before you even really know if you're gonna leave or not?" He asks next, under his breath so Nikki has no way of hearing it. 

"Ask your married girlfriend that before you come at me with it, Mick, alright?" I ask him neutrally, shutting the door in his face before stepping back to the bed, hesitant to wake Nikki up but doing it anyway so we won't be late. 

I wasn't shocked when Mick let on that he knew about Duff and I because, like with me and Nikki, he just knew when something was up.

Looking back, Mick had a point, but at that time he was the last person I wanted to hear it from, because Emi wasn't estranged from her husband, or even on bad terms with him. She was just cheating for whatever reason while her husband stayed in the blissful dark. Mick was "the other woman" therefore he had no place to speak to me about my relationship with Duff.

"Nikki, get up, we gotta get packed." I gently shake him and he groans out. 

"Baby, let me sleep." He mumbles, eyes squeezed closed, face scrunching slightly for a second. 

"We gotta be in L.A. in seven hours, c'mon." I nudge at him again, and his red eyes open, disgruntled, taking a moment before sitting up.

"I did it again last night?" He asks me, rubbing the crust from his eyes as I slip my slippers on. 

"Yep."

"Are they pissed?" 

"They're worried." I inform him. "I'm worried, too." I add, stepping to the door. 

"I'm fine." He says after me.

"Glad to hear it." I open the door, taking a moment to add, "and I'm not 'baby' to you anymore," before leaving. 

I get to my room and get my things packed, being interrupted by a knock at the door. 

When I get it open, Duff is on the other side, wearing nothing but his underwear. 

"I think I left my necklace in here." He tells me and I step aside, watching him grab it from the bedside table before he turns to me and says, "so, you guys are leaving tonight?" He asks me.

"Yeah." I nod. "Gotta go watch Vince walk down the aisle." 

He chuckles and I do, too, realizing how ironic the reality of it is. 

"...Is, um...Nikki okay?" He cautiously questions.

"Yeah." I nod. "I'm sorry I didn't go back to your room last night, I just thought it'd be best if he eased off before I went to bed and then I accidentally fell asleep before I could leave so…" 

"No, no, Viv, it's fine. You still care about him, even though he's shitty sometimes he's still the guy you've been with for the past six years. I'm not upset that you're making sure he's okay." He nods reassuringly. 

Before I can say "okay", there's another knock at my door, and I step to it and open it, Tommy and Vince waiting for me. 

"Ya ready?" Tommy asks, him and Vince both wearing sunglasses. 

"Yeah." I reply, going to zip my suitcase, Tommy following in after me to grab it, taking a double take when he notices Duff. 

"Hey, man."

"Hey." Duff replies, rubbing the back of his neck, before looking to Vince. "Vinnie, you ready to walk down that aisle?" He asks him with a smile.

"Yeah, just so Sharise will stop bitching about wedding details." He responds with a groan in his tone and Duff chuckles. "But her and Skylar are coming back with me for a honeymoon so just be on your best behavior--not that you aren't most times." He adds. 

"Nah, I'll give Slash and Stevie the heads up, though." He assures him. 

"Thanks, dude." Vince says back.

"Alright, see you when we get back." Tommy says, patting at Duff's shoulder. 

"See ya." Duff says to them as they head out. 

"I gotta pee and I'll be down." I lie.

Vince looks at me, oddly, with a small bit of hesitance before he shuts the door and I rub my lips and look at Duff, fumbling with my fingers. 

"You're not breaking up with me already, are you?" He repeats what I asked him before and I smile and shake my head.

"No, no." I grab his hand and tug him closer to me and he kisses my hair, wrapping his arms around me, tightly, and I rest my cheek against his skin. 

"Just have a safe flight, try not to kill anyone." He tells me and I nod.

"I love you." I tell him, looking up at him. 

"I love you, too." He leans down and kisses me, pulling away too soon. "I'll see you tomorrow night."

"See you tomorrow night." I agree, taking a mental picture of his soft grin.

The next day was spent scrambling to keep everyone together--especially Nikki--because Sharise deserved one day to be with Vince without a fight...little did I know the only fight that would occur would be between Vince and I, and not him and Nikki, like I feared.

"Okay," I straighten her veil, examining her dress one last time as she hands me my bouquet, "you look beautiful, Sharise." I assure her and she continues nitpicking possible flaws in the mirror. 

"I know we're already married so this is just a vow renewal or whatever but I'm nervous." She admits to me, fanning at herself a little. 

"There's no reason to be." I tell her. 

"Where's Sky?" 

"With your parents." 

"Where's Tansy?" 

"Getting her dress on." 

"Where's Nikki?"

"In the bathroom." 

"In the bathroom or shooting up?" 

"In the bathroom. Tommy's on smack watch." 

"Okay." She lets out a breath, trying to calm down. "Vince...is he--"

"He's ready to walk when you are." As I say this, the door opens and Nikki and Tansy come in.

"Sharise, the wedding party's waiting for you." Tansy tells her a little shakily. 

I think she's beginning to withdrawal. 

"Alright. Okay." Sharise inhales and exhales. 

"You got this." I promise her. 

"You're right." She nods and I help her with her dress as she heads to the door. 

Nikki, Tommy, Mick, and a couple other guys I've never met that are good friends of Sharise and Vince are wearing their tuxes with a hot pink sash, to match the bridesmaids knee length, hot pink dresses with black tull underlying the skirt. 

We file into line, Nikki and getting in front of Sharise since she's appointed me with Matron of honor. 

"You showered." I mumble to Nikki, impressed. 

"Tommy threatened to spray me off with a water hose. I didn't feel like being cold." He mumbles and I scoff as the music starts, the doors opening to lead outside, where we have to walk down stone stairs to meet in a spacious courtyard. 

"I'm getting war flashbacks." He says next once it's our turn to start walking. 

"From our wedding, yeah, me freaking too." I reply in a hiss. 

"I was gonna say from Tommy's wedding but sure." He scoffs bitterly. 

"Just don't leave this one every fifteen minutes to slip into the bathroom and shoot up." I ignore his comment, the arm that my hand is looped through tenses up and I can feel him glaring at me through his sunglasses. 

"Don't be a fucking bitch." He tells me as we step down the stairs and approach the guests, seeing Vince and the other groomsmen and bridesmaids waiting for us. 

"Little late for that." I point out. 

"And our wedding wasn't even that bad, Viv." He randomly cuts back to our initial back and forth and I fake a smile for the crowd, speaking through my teeth to reply, "Wish I could say the same for the months to follow it." 

We separate at the alter, and I push my feelings aside when I look to see Sharise stepping down the stairs, looking stunning as ever. 

When she gets down here, I'm straightening the back of her dress as she takes Vince's hands. 

The ceremony doesn't take very long, and once the reception comes and all the pictures are done with being taken, I'm ready to get out of this dress--but it's not ready for me to get out of it.

I grind my teeth, dreading asking this bastard for help, but I know he's got his knife and the zipper of my dress is stuck. 

"Nikki," I tap at his shoulder as he downs another glass of wine. 

"What?" He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. 

"Can you help me get out of this dress?" I ask him and he suddenly bursts into laughter. 

"I'd rather fuck a pot of boiling hot oil than fuck you." He tells me. 

"No, asshole, I mean literally help me get this off because the zipper is stuck." I explain. 

"Oh." He says, turning me to look at it. "Yeah, I guess." He stands up and I head to the bathroom as he pulls his pocket knife from his pocket.

Once we get to the bathroom, I'm pulling my arms from the sleeves the best I can before I look at him. 

"Just go to sawing away here." I point to the seam that's three-fourths zipped. 

He starts cutting at it, and it soon gets looser and looser to the point there should be plenty of room to finish pushing it down my hips...and I would if his hands weren't steadily holding at my bare sides, his eyes on my back as I look at him in the mirror and wait for him to snap back into reality. 

He never does, and I'm forced to clear my throat to whisk the tension away. 

"Um, I got it from here." I tell him, hinting that his hands on my skin aren't needed.

He just looks at me in the mirror and holds at them tighter, making me go to hit at the tops of his hands, only I realize this is one of the few moments he probably finds peace in because he can pretend, even for a second, that everything isn't screwed sideways. 

I just rest my palms over his hands, making eye contact with him in the mirror, looking us over, and I smile sadly, realizing we won't ever be those people again. 

After his moment is finished, he's gently patting my sides before taking a step back and putting his knife back into his pocket. 

"Thanks, again." I say to him before he goes. "No problem." He mumbles, stepping out. 

I rush back to the bridal suite to avoid being seen half naked, to change into a more comfortable dress.

As soon as I shut the door, I turn around and see Vince nursing a beer, and I jump. 

"Jesus, Vince!" I snap at him, taking a deep breath and he rolls his eyes for a second. "What the hell are you doing here?" I ask him, peeling the dress down my legs, not caring that he's getting an eyeful of me in nothing but skimpy panties since he's seen me completely naked in the pictures of me that Nikki's shown off to him. 

"Hiding from my in laws." He replies, taking another sip of beer. 

"You're not supposed to be drinking." I remind him.

"Who's gonna tell them?" He asks me, raising his brows. 

"Doesn't matter if the state doesn't know--God knows. That's who you'll have to answer to in the end." 

"Oh-Oh, my fuck." He chuckles out, his tongue swiping the inside of his bottom lip. 

"What? You think standing before God and being confronted with the fact you're still drinking after killing your friend in a drunk driving accident is funny?" I hiss at him.

 "I think the bible warns against becoming a drunkard but doesn't it also say, "you must not commit adultery'?" 

My heart pounds in my chest, my eyes wide, and he stands up from his spot on the fluffy parlor chair. 

"So you can give me shit about killing Razzle and still drinking, but every time the sweat on Duff's back dries after he's done fucking you, it's just another nail being hammered into Nikki's coffin, once he finds out." He says, pointing at me with the hand holding at his bottle. "And that blood's gonna be on your hands." He adds. "Not mine." 

[iusedtoknowwhatawishwasfor]

Queequeg's Resurrection

For: Astrid // Berenbos

QUEEQUEG

Oh my glob. Oh my glob. Oh my glob. I think that's what my human, Mommy, says. There was a big thing like another doggie but with no hair and lots of teethies. I think it wanted to eat me! I got away but he ripped out some of my feathers. My feathers are little perfect fluffy hairs on the back of my legs. That's what they are called - look it up. I swears. 

My poor feathers. BUT - I runned away and now I'm hiding. It's very wet here and the grass is higher than me. This isn't like where Mommy and me live so’s I hope I find her. She has red hair like me and always smells nice and gives me treaties. She is nice and soft to lay on when she watches the glowy box. 

I don't hear the toothy dog anymore, so I am going to see if I can move from here. I poke my nose out and sniff the air. I don't smell its weird stinky smell so I think I might be OK to walk around. I want to see if I can sniff out Mommy. I start out with one my nose to ground but I keep checking with my eyes because that doggie was so quiet. I move real slow and then I catch it - a whiff of Mommy!! Oh my glob!!

I move faster but I'm still looking a lot. Mommy's fren Muldo thinks I'm dumb. I heard him call me 'dumb dog' but I am not dumb. I am a smart doggie and I will show him. I will find Mommy. 

Mommy... Mommy... Mommy... 

If I keep saying it in my head maybe I will find her quicker. OH! I hear her. MOMMY!!

I burst out from the grasses and there she is wrapped in a binky. She is all wet - no wonder it took me some time. She is standing next to Muldo - HE is the dumb one. I arf and arf and she spins to look at me. 

"Queequeg!!" Mommy yells bending down. I run so fast I almost fall. It's my Mommy! She picks me up and I gib her all the kissies. She holds me close and she starts to cry. No cry, Mommy - I am here. Be happy!

"Holy shit - maybe you're not such a dumb dog after all." Muldo says and I want to growl at him but I am just so happy to be safe with Mommy that I don't. She gibs me more cuddles and then says "I can't believe it! You're ok." I gib her more kissies. She buries her head in my fur and gives me one last huggie. 

That was a close one! I won't be leaving Mommy's side again!!

SCULLY

I get overwhelmed when I see that little tuft of red hair coming my way. I can't believe it - my little guy is OK. I don't think I realized just how much I love him until now. Tears are welling up in my eyes and I don't even care. I hear Mulder saying something about my "dumb dog" not being so dumb but it fades in the background as I give him more hugs. I think before he entered my life, I didn't realize how much love I had to give - now I have someone to give it to and I need this little ball of floof in my life. 

"You're ok - my little floof." I murmur as I hug him to my chest and begin walking back towards the motel. Mulder trails along behind me muttering more things I don't hear in my still-shocked state.  

I unlock the door to my room and, only then, do I release him to the floor. He proceeds to hop around excitedly at my feet. My smile beams and I bend over to scratch behind his ears. Mulder has followed me into my room and sits down in the chair near the small table. He has stopped talking, probably realizing that I wasn't listening anyway. 

"Want some food, little man? I bet you're starving!" I say as I move to open a bag of kibble. I was still in too much shock to throw anything of his away yesterday. I put down his bowl and smile as he happily stuffs himself on the dry food. 

I sit down on the chair opposite to Mulder and watch Quee eat. 

"Sorry, Scully - I guess I didn't realize how much you loved him." My brows furrow as I look at him. Am I that much of a robot in his eyes? That I couldn't even love my dog? I think he knows how I took it within a second. I watch idly as Quee hops up on the bed across from us. 

"He's my dog. Of course I love him." I say flatly. 

"Hey, Scully, I didn't mean anything by it... I just..." he trails off, looking embarrassed. 

"It's fine." 

"Clearly it's not - I didn't mean you're incapable of love or anything..." Oh, Mulder, shut the fuck up before you get yourself in more trouble. I roll my eyes to the ceiling then close them. "Of course you are capable of love... like with your mom and stuff...." Has his mind left the building? I give him a look that conveys this.

"I just... it makes me think of all the things you must want for your life but don't have because of this job." 

"Mulder, I have Quee *because* of this job, remember?" 

"Yeah... but he's just one step closer to a normal life. You're just missing the husband and 2.5 kids." 

"Mulder, where is this even coming from?" 

"I don't know - our conversation out there on that rock. Am I really the stubborn captain dragging you around on a fruitless quest? I don't want you to miss out on things that could make you happy."

"Mulder. First of all, I wouldn't be here if it didn't make me happy and leave me with a sense of fulfillment. Second, you are not dragging me anywhere. I wouldn't be going with you if I didn't want to be there. I'm not Ishmael or the rest of the doomed crew. I'm my own person and make my own career and life choices." I said, somewhat offended about the way he's making ME into the hapless puppy dog of this situation.

"I didn't mean to imply that you don't have agency here... just that... I want you to be happy," He said, it's his turn to be the puppy dog with the big sad eyes.

"I am happy. I know this job can be hard and challenging but it's one of the reasons I love it so much..." I am trying to convey my truth to him in my eyes. "I was never the kind of little girl who dreamed of her wedding day or had her children's names picked out. I wanted adventure and to make a difference and I'm living that life so I'm happy. I'm happy with... you."

He gives me a shy smile. "Are you with me?"

Shit... this has taken a turn. "I... could be... if that was something we both wanted."

"Is it something you want?" It is just me or has his voice gotten deeper? Also it's gotten about 10 degrees hotter in here. I open my mouth but nothing comes. He saves, and slays, me with his next comment. "I want it."

"You do?" I squeak out. Jesus, is that even my voice? 

"I'm not going to lie and say I haven't been thinking about you and I... for a long time. I never knew what I wanted out of life as a kid. I never knew where life would take me. I certainly didn't expect you." He says with a fond smile quirking his lips. "But maybe that's the best part of life - those things that come out of nowhere and surprise you. All of a sudden, you have everything you didn't know you wanted right in front of you."

"Is that what I am to you?" I can't even believe I got those words out - I'm so shocked. This has been the most bizarre few days. I need to hear him say it - say those words - what he wants,

"Yes - you came out of nowhere and turned my life upside down. I didn't know that I would ever, or could ever, feel this way about someone. So... yes... you're all I want."

"You're all I want, too." I whisper but he must hear it because suddenly his face is right in front of mine. He moved lightning fast from his seat to kneeling in front of mine. His hands are light on my knees as he looks me straight in the eye, asking for my permission. I give a small nod and then we're kissing. I can't believe it. How did this even happen? We're kissing and his hands are in my hair and my arms are linked around his neck.

QUEEQUEG

What is dis?! He looks like he's gibbing her kissies. Only I am allowed to kiss mommy!! I have to put a stop to dis!

I jump off the bed and run at them...

MULDER

I can't believe it. I'm finally kissing Scully and it's perfect... exactly what I thought it would be. I knew we would be so good together...

JESUS!!

QUEEQUEG

I pounce!!

MULDER

Her dog is attacking us! Well... not attacking but he jumped into her lap and is now barking incessantly.

"I knew your dog hated me," I say dejectedly until I look up at her face. There is so much love and joy in those baby blues. We grin at each other and then we're laughing hysterically. This whole thing is ridiculous but I can't believe I finally got to kiss her. I'm actually giddy with it and I don't think I have ever felt this way, at any point, in my life.

“Scully, I don’t think is going to work…” I start and her face drops. “If your dog is going to jump on us every time I kiss you because I plan on doing it a lot.”

Her face lights up. “Oh two men battling for my affections!” She puts on a fake southern drawl that makes me chuckle. “I mean, Queequag does share my bed at night…”

“We’ll see for how much longer…” I lean in and give her a soft, slow kiss until the damn dog jumps up between us again. “Think you can make room for a fox, as well as a hound?”

She groans and rolls her eyes. “That was bad, even for you. But yes, I have plenty of room for both of my boys.” She gently pushes the pup off her lap and places her hands on my cheeks, her nails lightly scratching the 5 o’clock shadow there. She leans in and I meet her halfway for a kiss that somehow feels more intimate than the others before it. “Mulder, you know I love you, right?”

“I hoped, Scully, I hoped you loved me as much as I love you,” I say, touching my forehead to hers. She captures my lips again and I do my best to push the furball back. “So… when we get back… think maybe your mom can watch the hellspawn for a weekend? I really want you all to myself.” 

“Mmm… that is definitely possible.” She makes me happier and happier by the minute. 

THAT WEEKEND…

QUEEQUEG

Mommy is acting weird. Ever since we got back from the swampy place she is jittery… as jittery as me. She is walking around moving our stuff and playing with her hair. It’s really weird.

There is a knock at the door! I love visitors!! 

Mommy lets them in and OH MY GLOB! It’s grandma!! I run toward her and leap into her arms. “Hello, my little fluffy one!” she says and I gib her all my kissies. “You’re coming to stay with me for the day! How about that?”

Sounds great, gram - you gib me lots more treaties than mommy. You say it’s our secret so’s I neber tell her. 

“Dana, don’t you look nice… expecting another visitor after me?” She winks her eye at mommy.

“Mooooom…”

“Just asking, dear!” she says and throw her hand that’s not holding me up. “Just… maybe you could give me some details when you come to get furry man tomorrow.”

“We’ll see…” she said, grabbing my baggie with all my stuffs and handing it to gram. “Thanks again for watching him, mom. I’ll see you both tomorrow.” She kisses gram on the cheek and ruffles my head fur. Then gram and I are off to the place with tons of treats. We pass Muldo  in the hall and after he says ‘hey’ to gram, he ruffles my head fur too. He smells like the woods, not the swamp. I guess he’s ok. I guess I can let mommy keep him.

END.

@xfilesfanficexchange here it is!! I hope it lives up to the expectations of the prompt writer (prompter? Is that even a word?)

[lokisprettygirl]

Love is Selfless, It's Kind (Loki x Female Reader) (Part 38)

Summary: Mean loki is mean but he is also afraid out of his mind So he gives you an ultimatum.

Warning : 18 + , Smut, Angsty angst, mean loki, soft loki, scared loki, over protective loki, degradation, Dacryphilia , almost 5k words eeks, let me add possesive toxic behaviour here as well

Taglist : @colifower @rinacreateart @christineblood @the-wounded-healer05 @lokiprompts @geeky-politics-46 @sharklover927 @virtualstrawberrydinosaur @huntress-artemiss @rat-p1ss

Next morning when you woke up, you were hungover to say the least, you haven't felt this hungover since forever, ofcourse not including the time you drank that asgardian wine. Loki wasn't in the room so you made your way out to the living room, you don't remember much from last night but you do remember that he took care of you and he cuddled you? Yess to that. When you stepped off the bed, everything still spun around, you quickly made your way to the kitchen and there he was cooking something.

He didn't smile when he looked at you and it did hurt you, you almost forgot about his silly punishment that you didn't feel like you deserve, it's been six days, how long he's going to keep this up? You hopped yourself up and sat down on the countertop, your head felt heavy and you felt nauseous. "Did you water the plant?" He asked you as he glared at you "Noo I'll do it later" you told him. You haven't missed a day of watering that herb and you can't or it will die and so would you fifty years later or tomorrow or just today from the Hangover or murderous mom or probably your dad would pop out of somewhere to burn you alive.

"Go do it now" he said sternly and you groaned "Thanks, good morning to you too lo" you mumbled as you stepped down the counter "It's not really a good morning for you is it? Just felt futile to say it" he snickered and you glared at him "Don't give me eyes, do the thing you're told to do, and then come back to drink this" you saw him straining a liquidy stuff in a cup and you went back to the room to water it, in three weeks the plant has grown a little bit "Hey plantie, how are you today" you mumbled and you could feel the leaves moving, it always did whenever you'd talk to it. It was a leaving breathing thing, Magic right "Don't tell Mommy frigga but her son is being a real dee eye see kay these days" you whispered and more leaves fluttered around you.

"I know, soft baby kitten lo is hibernating somewhere, I don't know where" you huffed and the plant nodded in yes "If you're done complaining of me, come out, you're supposed to drink it while it's hot" you heard Loki's voice and go back to the kitchen "what is this, I'm hungover lo" you groaned as you put your head down on the dining table "And I'm trying to fix that, it's a tea, with ginger , lemon and other midgardian herbs , you'll feel better" he told you as he sat down and sipped on his tea. It didn't taste like how you make it, even though he made it exactly how you did.

You sipped on the ugly looking concoction he made, it didn't taste bad thankfully and it indeed helped with the nausea. He was sipping on his tea in his usual royal posh manner, he was scrolling something on his phone. There was a time when he didn't understand how the phone worked, you taught him, now he's using that cellular device to ignore you "I can feel you staring y/n" he mumbled and you snapped out of your thoughts "Soo?" You glared at him

"So what?

"What am I supposed to do if you can feel it? My boyfriend is pretty I am going to stare, what's your problem?"

He almost had to use to magic to stop the smile that was going to creep over his face at that. You're adorable and he's hating this but you still don't understand why he's doing this.

"My problem is that, we have a rehearsal dinner to attend and you have to go see maximoff and others so I have to drop you there, then I have to get ready myself, it's already 2 pm, so drink your tea and get ready so I can fulfill my responsibility" he told you in one go and then he went back to scrolling on his phone..

"You don't have to drop me if it's such a task lo, I can call a cab" you huffed as you got up and he glared at you again "Ahhuh and then what ? you die? Because you manage that when you are on your own somehow" he snapped back and you teared up. He's being awfully mean and you just didn't expect this kind of talk from him. That's your soft baby lo right ? You're so spoiled because of his softness that everything he's doing in last few days just feels criminal "Right I forgot I'm useless" you mumbled and it earned you more glares , he placed his phone down and walked over to you, he placed his hands on the back of your head and used his thumbs to make you look at him.

Your teary eyes broke his heart "Never ever say that again sweetheart, am I clear? " He wiped the tears that fell from your eyes and you nod in yes, then he leaned down to kiss your forehead and this is the most he's going to touch you today so you both savored it "Get ready, don't make me spank you" he whispered and then he went back to your shared room. Maybe he should have just done that instead of doing whatever torture this is.

Once you showered you got dressed up, you kept your face bare since you'd have to do it when you get ready for the rehearsal dinner, you packed your dress and make up products in a bag, loki was already dressed up and he was waiting for you in the living room

When you came out he couldn't stop staring at you, that's his sweet princess, all bare faced and pretty like she's supposed to be. He wanted to go smother you in affection and gentle sweet love making but ofcourse he didn't do that. "I'm ready" you mumbled and he took the bag away from you "Wait just a second" he went back to the room and took the plant and kept it in his vault. It's too risky to leave it here all alone. If someone is after him or you, he can't take any risks.

On the way to the tower he didn't say anything and neither did you but the silence was killing you "I'm going back to work after the wedding gets over" he glared at you when you said that "No you're not" you chuckled when he said that "Umm Sorry..What did you say?" You huffed "I said..No you're not going back to work" he answered nonchalantly.

"Well you can't decide that" you crossed your arms "I can and I will silly girl" Maybe you shouldn't have said anything at all, should have just kept quiet. He was right, you haven't learned anything at all, nothing. Nada. This punishment is only making you act out more.

When you both reached the tower, you went inside quickly, you finally had an access pass. Yay. You went to the 14th floor and everyone was there except tony and pepper. Argh they're probably being nasty with each other. You saw Eddie and hugged him, then venom scolded you for almost dying again especially when he wasn't around. "Only die when i is around, so I can get inside and fix you" venom told you and you chuckled. You could feel loki burning holes in your back. Clint and others were watching and laughing at something so you joined them "What are you guys laughing about?" You asked him and he laughed again

"Just old footage from missions and stuff" he told you and you nod "Wait you want to see his clips when he came here, I bet you have seen the leaked viral one" he asked you and you chuckled "The ant has no quarrel with a boot one ..oh yeah" loki sat down next to clint, and he connected his laptop to the tv so everyone can watch "This is humiliating" he huffed and you pout at him "That's him in Stuttgart, when he hypnotised me and later I realised he was doing it on purpose, he was trying to get caught" you almost gasped as you saw him in all black overcoat with that scarf on, where is that scarf? his hair used to be longer at the time "Woww that's hot" you gasped audibly and wanda smacked your arms.

Loki had a small smile on his lips as he watched you. Only you could enjoy him committing senseless enormities "Oh wait this is the fun one, it happened right here so enjoy the hd view" Clint turned on a video and Loki's eyes widened "Oh no no stop that.. right now" he said as he panicked

"Enough, You are, all of you are beneath me.. I am a god, you dull creature, and I will not be bullied by..." He looked so mad, so hot but then you saw hulk smashing him repeatedly on the floor again and again, like a piece of cloth, you stood up and everyone else just laughed but you got really worried for a second "Puny god" you watched Bruce or hulk pass by and then you heard him wincing and was he making that noise? That Sounded like an injured dog "That was pathetic brother" thor said to loki and he was just totally completely embarassed .

"That was awesome" you turned to look at him "Haha enjoying my misery y/n?" Loki asked you and you just smiled "No that was truly awesome, not for you I'm guessing but, you got smashed like that by hulk? And you survived that? Who could have survived that? Like you're so strong and durable and almost indestructible.. wow I'm just wowed lo" he wasn't expecting you to say that, for a second he thought you'd make fun of him, he forgot that you're his princess and you'd find your reasons to be kind to him, he got up and then he hugged you "Thank you princess" there he was your sweet baby lo, but he was gone as swiftly as he came when he realised that

"Okay enough of this if we are not ready and at the venue by the time, Pepper is going to burn this tower down with all of us inside" nat reminded everyone and all of them scurried off to get ready. You left to his room as well to get ready and he followed you, he just wanted to fuck you right now after what just happened but he can't not until you learn your lesson.

"You know when we resume the fucking sesh, I wouldn't mind being the dull creature, and be beneath you my god, you're so fucking hot when you're mean lo" you winked at him and he could feel himself hardening but he won't give in to your tricks, he's the master of trickery "Get ready" you sighed as you heard him, it took him 5 minutes to get ready himself and he laid down on his bed and used magic to calm himself down, now he can't stop picturing you on your knees, doing whatever he would ask you to, being a sweet little whore for him. "Lo? Lo? how's the dress?" He snapped out of his filthy thoughts as he heard you "what?" He asked you confused "How's the dress?" You twirled around a little and he wanted to kiss you so bad right now "You look beautiful" he mumbled and then you went to finish your make up. The venue was few miles away and they had to leave on time.

Once you got your make up done, you saw him on the bed, his eyes were closed so you assumed he was taking a nap, he kept his hands behind his head and he looked scrumptious. You walked over to him and you crawled up on him carefully to not wake him, you placed your thighs on either side of his waist, he smelled so good, and he looked so good and he left you all frustrated two days ago. You leaned down and sucked on his neck, as soon as he felt you he moaned and then he tried to pull you away "Get off y/n" you placed your index finger on his lips as you shushed him up and you continued sucking and nipping on his neck.

He groaned and he flipped you around "Sweet whore, you really think you can play the god of mischief? I know what you are doing and it's not working" he kept your hands above your head and wrapped your legs around his waist and then he humped into your heated core, you moaned so loudly as you felt the friction "Godd loo please fuck me babyyy I need you please" you whined and he just snickered in response, he wants to, desperately but he won't give in "ahh look how pathetic you look right now, I relish this sweet y/n , I can make you suffer like this forever if I have to" you knew he was going to stop again once you're close but you still enjoyed each n every movement of his hips.

"mmm no pleaseee daddy, I'll be good I promise, I'll do whatever you want" you mumbled in a last attempt to coax him but he didn't budge "Oh stop with your tricks silly girl, you promised me before and you broke it" he kept his head in the crook of your neck or he'll end up kissing you and making love to you. He grabbed your chin with his one hand and rubbed his thumb over your lips messing your lipstick all around your lips "You're ruining your makeup but you don't really care in the wake of your whorishness do you?" He whispered in your ear and you whined "I'll let you ruin me in everyway you want daddy" he groaned loudly as he heard you. His hips kept moving in the center of your core, he was trying so hard to resist you.

"Then let me ruin you properly darling" you almost celebrated internally as you thought he was going to fuck you finally but he had other plans "Now I'll bring you closer to the release if you'd allow me to wipe your face clean, the face you have worked so hard on in past hour" he said to you and you looked at him "Umm do I get to cum ?" You asked him and he grinned "That's upto me but keep your wager on no" he answered and you huffed, he's so mean, but it was kind of hot "Okayy" you whispered and he couldn't believe this

"Oh little whore, you're really desperate for release aren't you? Would do anything huh? " He asked you as he conjured a piece of cloth in his hand, it looked the same as your makeup removing wipes "Last chance pathetic whore" he whispered as he bucked his hips into you again "Pleease please keep moving" you begged to him and he chuckled "Oh look at you..fuck darling.. norns" he whispered and then you felt the wet wipe on your forehead first, he would feel bad about ruining your hardwork, but you seemed so willing and desperate he wanted to destroy you.

"Ohh fuckk please" why this was so hot to you? Why him ruining your face like that made you dripping wet? You felt the wipe smudging your eye shadow all over and you moaned, his one hand still kept your arms over your head, so you couldn't even touch him. You felt bound and at his mercy and you loved it.

"You wanted to be beneath me you dull creature? You sure look it right now my cock desperate whore" he whispered filthy things in your ear as he ruined your face slowly, he didn't stop until all the colours meshed with each other and you looked all messed up for him. He stopped the movement of his hips once he was done with his work and you whimpered, he saw you tearing up and he placed soft kisses over your closed eyes "Fuck you look so broken, my love" he chuckled and you just sobbed quietly "make me cum please lo ..god please" you felt so hazy and floaty you just wanted to cum "oooh didn't I ask you to put your bets on no?" His voice so dark and evil you wanted to smack the shit out of him in the moment.

"You're so meannn" he leaned down and kissed your forehead "I know I am, but you're soaking wet right now, what does that say about you ?" He got off the bed and you look completely debauched "Sweet love, I can use magic to control my urges, but what about you hmm? How long do you think your mortal fragile body can take this?" He was fixing his shirt, tucking it inside his pants as he talked. You were panting heavily, he stopped right before you were about to cum and it frustrated you so much, you looked so beautiful. So his.

"Fix your face and change your underwear?" He chuckled and you rolled your eyes "I'm giving you twenty minutes, if you're not downstairs by then, I'll leave without you, you can come with wanda" he kissed your forehead before he left and you threw the pillows away in frustration.

Ofcourse you took more than twenty minutes, you had to wash your face and do it all over again. He sighed as he looked at the time, he didn't want to leave you but he can't make empty threats. You are not taking him seriously anyways. "Wanda can I trust you with this? I need her to be safe" loki called wanda as he left for venue "Why are you not taking her again?" She asked him confused and he sighed "I have something important to do" he lied and she assured him "Don't worry I have got my girl, and Clint and vision would be with me, nothing to worry about" she told him and he hangs up

Is he going too far with this? He wasn't really thinking clearly, you want to go back to work after you almost died again. You haven't learned shit yet. When you went downstairs you looked for loki but he wasn't there but you got a text for him

Precious baby lo: When will you start taking my words seriously y/n?

He left without you, of all the things he have done and said to you in the past week, this is what hurt you the most. He left without you, he didn't take you with him. He didn't wait for you. You saw wanda approaching you, she looked so pretty in her little red dress. She took you towards the car, on the way Clint and wanda were making random jokes but your mind was distracted. Also this is the first time you were seeing vision in a human form and he looked good.

When you reached the venue, most of them were there, thor was chatting up with jane and lo. You went towards them and she hugged you. Loki looked at you but you didn't look at him at all, you ignored him and walked away to greet Tony n Pepper. Finally the wedding was here, just one more day. Throughout the dinner rehearsal you ignored him and stayed with others, you could feel his eyes on you but you didn't care, your self respect rose out of nowhere. He left you.

Loki knew you'd throw tantrums when you'd see him, probably a snarky remark or two but he didn't expect you to ignore him like he didn't exist. He was confused. The tables were turned. He saw you at the bar sipping on an orange juice like a child and he walked over to you "So you made it here safely " he said to you but you didn't respond, you felt too hurt.

"Silent treatment I see" he said again and you smiled at him "This is what you want right? You want me to be good? I'll be good, I'll be quiet, I won't say anything, thanks for leaving me again" your voice choked up as you spoke. Where is this coming from? He didn't leave you, he just left..oh fuck.

You stepped off the bar stool and you made your way to the bathroom, he ran his hands through his hair as he saw you walking out. He have hurt you for real this time. He did take it too far, he followed you as you made your way to the bathroom and when he got inside he saw you crying and his heart broke "Y/n" you wiped your tears as you heard him "Whatt?" You yelled and he walked towards you "I didn't leave-leave you" he explained himself and you chuckled "Yeah you just left me at the tower, what happened to protecting me? You didn't care about that huh" you snapped and he glared at you "I left you with people I knew you'd be safe with"

"Yeah whatever I'm done with this loki" you told him and he grabbed your arms to turn you to him "You're done with this? You? Are. Done with this?" He pulled you closer to him, your faces mere inches away from each other "Yes..fuck you" as soon as the words left your mouth he kissed you roughly , you felt his lips moving on yours and you responded once you realised what was happening. He was kissing you "Well fuck you too darling, you honestly give no fucks about what I want, do you?" He mumbled between the kisses and then he lifted you up as he walked you straight towards the nearest wall and he wrapped your legs around him.

"I do, why would you think otherwise? I did what you wanted me to do, she threatened to kill herself what I was supposed to do let her die?" You screamed a little and he glared at you. He took off your panties and shoved it in his pocket then he unbuttoned himself and thrusted inside you in one quick motion, you gasped as you felt his cock inside you after long 6 days "That's exactly what you were supposed to do disobedient slut of mine" he moved in and out of you, fucking you roughly against the wall, you threw your head back as you felt the sweet sensation building up "Well I can't leave people to die like that" you responded and he punched the wall next to you, it cracked, you winced as he did.

He kissed you again and he pulled the straps of your dress down so he could squeeze your bare breasts, you moaned as you felt your orgasm approaching and this time he didn't stop, he kept fucking into you, it's been too long and he needed to cum inside you too "Cum now insolent little princess" he whispered in your ear and you did instantly, you arched your back and grabbed onto him tightly as you worked through your orgasm, he let go too as soon as he felt you shaking and writhing, as soon as he had the snug warm feeling of your cunt squeezing him. He kissed you softly all over as you both tried to calm down.

Then he put you down slowly and you could see his eyes tearing up, he used his magic to clean you both up and then he passed you your underwear. You awkwardly put it on, he walked towards the sink and he leaned his arms against it, he was still hyper and breathing heavily "Lo babyy" you walked towards him and he finally pulled you in for a hug, he lifted you up and placed you on the edge of the sink as he hugged you tightly "I do understand and I do listen baby, I made a mistake" you mumbled as you kept your head down on his shoulder "You have no idea what it's like for me princess, you have no clue how I felt when I saw you falling from the building , you could have died again and I...I'm living in fear of losing you every second of my life.. You just don't understand how hard it is for me.. you won't unless I would die right in front of your eyes" you kept your palm over his lips as you heard him, you can't imagine losing him like that ever.

"I know I don't, and I'm sorry that I don't, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have gone that day without you, I panicked and I'm sorry about that, what else do you want me to do or say lo? What do you want me to do?" You asked him and he sighed "I need you to listen to me princess, I need you to do what I want you to do, I am sorry I have made your life difficult, I have made it full of uncertainties I know, but I can't protect you unless you'd listen to me, I can't keep you safe if you would be so careless, you have to help me keep you safe " he cupped your cheeks and looked right into your eyes as he spoke "lo I.." he cuts you off before you can speak further "or you can..you can let go..I told you you'd be safer without me.. whatever happened with your mother, it's not as simple as it might look, something is happening I can feel it sweetheart, and it has something to do with me, I just need to figure out what, but this is going to be your life with me unfortunately, I can either keep you safe on my own terms or I can let you go and be free" you cried and shook your head as you heard him, anxiety filled every fibre of your being as he talked about letting go again "Don't say that please, I can't be without you loo please, I love you" you kissed him and he kissed you back lovingly and then he pulled away

"I know, I love you and don't you ever think that I can be without you either, but I can't do this your way, you don't want to be chained, you want to be independent and I admire that but I can't have you going out on your own for now, you have to allow me to control your life sweet girl, that's the only way I can keep you safe and alive, you're my everything and I need you here with me but if me having such power over you scares you or you want your freedom back, just go..go wherever you need, I'll help you sweetheart, I would give you everything you'd need to start a life on your own, you can keep the house darling, I'll still be there for you but as a friend, a well wisher, but you won't be mine and I won't control you. You'd be free from me and this relationship that only brings you more harm than I am worth "

Your heart broke with each and every thing he said, how could you even think of leaving him? How could he think like that? You can't, you belong to him and he's yours, how did you two get here again after everything? you felt him kissing you again and then he stepped away

"Dont make hasty decisions my love, take your time, but just know if you choose to be mine, I'll be the one who'd control every aspect of your life from now, you won't get to make your own decisions, don't take my words lightly, take your time with this please, I'll be at the party"

He wiped his tears and then he looked at you one last time before he left you to ponder over this.

[creedtheconquer]

Everything But Political

Request-"thank youuuuuuuuuuuuuu!So YN Hale Underwood is the first daughter,and she's pretty much like her mom (the only person both really trust) she's stoic and shy,tries to avoid the spotlight as much as she can but is brilliant in all the she does. Duncan has been in love with her since forever,but never managed to confess to her(his cockiness dissapears when she's around) so,after a lot or twits and turns he finally admits it and happy stuff. what do you think?"

Summery-"(Y/N) Hale-Underwood is her mother's pride and joy and loyal to a T. She has had a constant love hate relationship with the one and only Duncan Shepherd but little does she know he has loved her since they were little. How will this turn out?"

Pairings- Duncan Shepherd x Reader

Warnings- politics but not really if anyone cares about that, this is mostly just fluff for our Dunkin Donut.

*I hope you guys enjoy this story typed it up in little under 3 and a half hours! My request are always open I write for Cody and any character he has played minus David to respect him as a person who sadly lost his life. I also write for other AHS character so feel to request away!*

(Y/N) Hale-Underwood the poster child for America, her mother's pride and joy and she took that role and that spot light very very seriously. She loved her mother dearly and was loyal to the core. After her father died (Y/N) took up the protecter role of the family. She was her mother's rock, her supporting shoulder and she would do anything for her mother. If Claire need a break (Y/N) would step in to meeting for her mother without a second hesitation. Or if Claire just needed to vent the only person she would trust to vent everything to was (Y/N) to which (Y/N) would gladly sit for hours in her mother's room just listening, not talking that often because the way she saw it, she wasn't there to talk she was there to listen. So when Claire asked her to attend one of the annual Shepherd's Foundation events (Y/N) didn't refuse.

"Ah (Y/N) my dear, where is your mother?" Annette Shepherd, Claire's frenemie greats (Y/N) with a smile giving her a quick small hug. (Y/N) fakes a smile hugging her back thinking of the best way to answer her question knowing she's trying to get some kind of dirt on her mother.

"She had a press meeting and couldn't make it sadly so she sent me in her replace. She also sends her regards." (Y/N) says pulling away from Annette and she smooths out her form fitting navy blue pencil dress and Annette nods.

"Well my dear come in have fun you always more than welcome here." She beams up and (Y/N) and (Y/N) gives her a nod as she scans the room.

"Thank you Annette." (Y/N) says offering her a small smile as Annette walks off to great the new guest coming through the door.

From what Claire said this was a meeting about the incident that happened in Ohio, and the fact that she didn't trust the Shepherd's. (Y/N) was in the Oval office the previous night and watched Bill Shepherd quite literally guide her mother hand to sign his bill (Y/N) went on the defence.

(Y/N) moves quietly around the room, stopping periodically to very slyly listen in on people's conversations. Most are talking nonsense just there mundane day to day life and she rolls her eyes at their chit chat. But then there conversations that pique her interest, gossip about her mother and how she's the "anti-christ" to which (Y/N) nearly chokes on her drink trying not to laugh at the ridiculous theories/stories spun by the media. Then some hit very close to home, literally, and she has to bite her tongue to stop her from snapping back at the person spreading such lies.

(Y/N) opts to leave the main room, having heard enough, and she makes her way down the long white hallway leading to the main balcony where she sees her frenemie, Annette's son, Duncan. The two have grown up together seeing each other go through there each other's ups and downs, their worst days and their best. Growing up as little kids they were attached at the hip you would always find them together, you didn't have one if you had the other. But as they got older and realized where they stand that bond started to thin now when they did see each other it was a guessing game of are they going to get along like old times or be at each other's throats.

"Duncan." (Y/N) says coldly causing the taller brown head man to turn towards her and he gives her a once over before turning back to look out to the grounds of his Mother and Uncle's estate.

"(Y/N) what brings you here don't you have things to do for mommy." He mocks not moving his pale icy gaze to her and she scoffs at him.

"So this is how this interaction is going to go." She inquires sending a glare to the man next to her before folding her hands behind her back and she straighten out her posture. "I am her on my mother's behalf, I was hoping for a somewhat civil talk or else I would have never approached you Donut." (Y/N) smirks to herself knowing how much he hated when she called him that and as always he rolls his eyes finally looking down at her.

Little did (Y/N) know Duncan has been head over heels for her for has long has he can remember and he loves how loyal she is to her mother and he admires that deeply. He miss how they used to be before they fell into their places in the family dynamic and he wishes so badly to get back to that, but it seems like every time they are together it's like a game of russian roulette. Either they are how they used to be, laughing, relaxing, just being themselves enjoying each other's company. But more often than not they are like this, ever cold and stand offish with their guards up not trusting each other. Duncan can guess the reason for this interaction being cold was because of what is Uncle did the other night to which Duncan was outraged about. He argued that there were many other ways to go about getting the bill signed and that was not it, he felt so bad and he wanted to so badly call up (Y/N) and apologize but his ego stopped him.

"Look I'm sorry about what my uncle did I told him that was wrong." He speaks up breaking the tension tight silence that had fallen over them. (Y/N) looks up at him taken aback by his sudden sincere heart felt apology.

"You had no idea?" (Y/N) ask her ice cold front starting to melt as he nods. He turns his body slightly so he can fully face her and she does the same.

"If I had known I would have stopped him." He says softly as she sees him visibly relax has the tension fades between them. "Listen (Y/N) there is something I've been wanting to say this for a while now..."

"Duncan." Annette says from the end of the hall and he groans giving (Y/N) an apologetic look.

"Go for coffee with me later?" He asks glancing back up at his mother and (Y/N) nods softly.

"Yeah." (Y/N) says and she sees a smile tug at his lips has he brings her hand up to his lips and she places a soft kiss on her knuckles.

"I'll call you." He whisper dropping her hand and he walks off to his mother and (Y/N) nods softly feeling a little ping in her heart cursing herself for the feelings she harbors for her longest childhood friend.

(Y/N) returns home hours later completely exhausted tugging her heels off and she rolls her shoulders trying to release the tension of standing up straight for hours on end. She opens her closet and she steps out of her dress and she changes into something a lot more comfortable. She makes her way down to hallway to her mother's room and she knocks on the door softly waiting for the response.

"Come in." She hears her mother calm soothing voice sound from inside and she can't help but smile opening the door and she steps in. Claire was on the bed reading a book when (Y/N) walked in and the second she realizes it her daughter she smiles putting the book down, moving the blankets out of the way for (Y/N) to crawl in and lay her head on her mother's lap. "How did it go?" Claire asks running her fingers through (Y/N)'s hair causing her daughter to let out a sigh of relief.

"Well some people are convinced you're the anti-christ, hearing that nearly made me choke on my drink. Annette tried to get dirt on why you weren't there I told her you where busy off somewhere doing a press meeting she bought it. Bill was flaunting his victory with the bill I wanted to slap him right then and there." (Y/N) says with a sigh looking up at her mother and Claire smiles down at her tracing her daughter's beautiful features obviously getting them from her, it would be a lie if people didn't say she was almost a carbon copy of her.

"Did you see Duncan?" Claire asks caressing (Y/N)'s cheek and (Y/N) nods. "Did he say anything about how he's been whispering lies into the media's ear about me and your father?"

(Y/N) looks hurt learning this information, he had sounded so sincere in his apology he completely fooled her and that pained her. She thought that maybe they have gotten over the petty family rivalries and were getting back to how things used to be. Soon hurt gave way anger and boy was she mad, she wanted to march right to his apartment at that moment and give him a piece of her mind, "Yeah I saw him we spoke briefly but nothing of the matter was said that was important." (Y/N) says through almost gritted teeth and Claire picks up on that.

"He said something didn't he that's why you're angry." Claire says and (Y/N) closes her eyes and takes a deep breath.

"Yeah he said he was sorry for how his uncle did the other night with signing the bill, he sounded so sincere I believed him.....I should have know better." (Y/N) says anger laced into her words and Claire plays with her hair to soothe her.

"He's a Shepherd he can't be trusted they are dead set on tearing us down we can't let them in." Claire whispers holding (Y/N) close as (Y/N) feels tears fill her eyes.

"You're right thanks mom." (Y/N) says sitting up and she crawls out of bed walking to the door.

"You did great sweety you made me proud I love you." Claire says calling out to her daughter and (Y/N) nods not turning to face her.

"Thanks mom, I love you too." (Y/N) says in a low voice walking out of the room and down the hall. She slips on a pair of shoes and she walks out the front door.

"Annette isn't actually his mother, he's adopted." Claire says as (Y/N) closes the door knowing she going to confront Duncan.

"(Y/N) what the hell are you doing here so late?" Duncan says rubbing sleep from his beautiful icy blue eyes and (Y/N) glares pushing past him into his apartment.

"Care to explain why you've been spreading lies about my family to the media." (Y/N) snaps turning on her heels to face the man she loved to hate and hate to love standing by the door in his loose shorts and black t shirt.

"I...I, it's not me it's my mom she's just using me it's all her I'm just her attack dog." He sighs running a hand down his face as he very consciously walks towards (Y/N).

"Then why are you going through with it?!" (Y/N) shouts taking a step back from him, "Why? Fucking tell me Duncan! I actually believe you felt sorry earlier I thought you had changed!"

"(Y/N) Listen to me I can't just not listen to my mom, but I was sorry earlier." Duncan defends taking another step towards (Y/N).

"She's not even your real mom Duncan! You're adopted you don't owe her shit!" (Y/N) shouts and Duncan stops dead in his tracts.

"I'm what?" He asks and (Y/N) curses herself for letting that slip.

"Duncan I shouldn't have told you that." (Y/N) says dropping her anger and she steps towards him.

"No no don't I need to know." He says taking a deep breath but (Y/N) hears the stutter in it and she can tell he was about to cry.

"It wasn't my place to tell you I'm sorry Donut." (Y/N) says placing her hand on his shoulder and he pulls her fully to her holding her tight.

"No thank you, I would rather it have been you." He whispers through tears as the rock through his body and he shakes against her.

"Hey Donut, look at me." (Y/N) whispers pulling back and he meets her gaze and she reaches up to wipe his tears away. "You don't have to listen to her anymore, I can talk to my mother get you a pardon."

Duncan laughs slightly nodding his head, "You know there has always been something I've wanted to tell you for many many years now." He whispers his eyes flickering down to (Y/N)'s lips then back up to her eyes, "I have loved you since we were kids."

(Y/N) gasps slightly as he closes the gap and he kisses her, letting years of bottled up emotions take over not wanting to miss a single moment. "I love you too Duncan." She whispers breathlessly as they break the kiss.

"Fuck politics this is all that matters." Duncan whispers before kissing her again finally understanding the meaning to all of this their lives. It all fell into place in that single moment, he knew that their whole lives lead up to this moment and he was grateful. He finally had her and he was letting go he was going to hold on and fight with everything to keep this. He was home.

@ateliefloresdaprimavera

[garbageivereleasedintothevoid]

02-10-20

I felt you needed to see this meme after today. To remind you that I am normally a very closed off open book. And I'm sure you'll figure out what that means but just feel freakin honored because I do not let most people see me cry. The fact that you're my therapist makes exactly no difference to my brain.

Anyway, yeah. That was a lot. For me. Idk. Maybe it wasn't that much but it was a lot for me.

You've seen me casually mention shit that some other people wouldn't be able to say at all. And that's part of the defense. Pretend it doesn't bother you and people respond like it doesn't. And you never have to address it because it seems like it genuinely does not bother you. But it's a ploy. One that... Sara saw through near immediately. She even called me on it a couple times. She was like "Idk what to do for you because you won't open up." And I was just like "I've told you everything." And she just flashed this grin briefly and said "But you haven't opened up." And I was like fuck she's right. And told her so and she gloated just a little tiny bit. She just be like that. Lil shit loves being right. Anyway, that was when I actually started to open up to her. Or at least try to. It didn't work at first. I didn't know how. But I kept trying and she kept encouraging me. Until it eventually happened but that was the only time I've seen her... Low-key lose composure. I broke the absolute fuck DOWN. Like full on lost all control. I... Ended up calling her mommy while sobbing. And I saw this look of horror on her face as I looked up. I had previously not been able to see as I'd been sobbing with tears in my eyes and had my head down. And I just launched into apologizing and freaking out thinking she hated me now. She was honest in her response. She told me she didn't know how to react but that I had no reason to be sorry and that she wasn't mad at me. She didn't seem fully confident as she pulled herself together though. Idk. I think it mostly just shocked her because I'd never reacted that way before and to be fair, it was pretty extreme. But... In the moment, I thought I'd just isolated myself from the only person who seemed to give a goddamn about me at the time. I felt... Like she was the only one who gave a goddamn about me and tbh? I don't think I was wrong. At that time in my life, she was the only one who knew me well enough to give a shit about me as a unique individual. She was the only one who... Stuck around long enough to... Really get to know me. Everyone else gave up on me. And I think at times she was really close but it took her a lot more to get close. She played the long game with me and won me over slowly. Gained my trust, pushed me, encouraged me to do better and be better like she knew I could be.

But she also was willing to learn along the way. She knew what nonbinary was when we first met. And knew what would be considered today to be the absolute basics of how to treat a nonbinary person. But five years ago that was close to as much knowledge as you could reasonably expect any cishet person to ever have and it wasn't common by any means. But she learned. And she learned quickly. And somehow, some people do not want to acknowledge that part that she played in my life. Some people think I should just accept my station and not push for better. Some people don't truly understand that they might be happy with their place but others aren't as privileged. And yes, having been physically beaten by your ex is fucking awful and nobody should have to have dealt with that but that doesn't mean you understand everything. And neither does a social work degree. I don't fit her idea of someone who's been abused and she doesn't like that. I wasn't abused by a partner and the physical abuse was... Not as prevalent as every other kind. The sexual abuse was a big thing but... Idk. Rn I am not focusing on that very much and I'm grateful for that because if I was, I'm certain it wouldn't go well. The thing I talk about most was the emotional abuse and manipulation as well as the neglect. When I wasn't being told I would get laughed at for wearing emo stuff to school, I was being told my medical condition wasn't bad and I was just looking for attention. I was called a whiner for expressing any pain. And I am not saying I was perfect. But I was a child. I should have been taken seriously and I for damn sure should have been taught the basic skills that one needs to survive. I was told to just pick thing up little by little each day but like? What does that entail? I'd ask for individual steps and be looked at like I was lying. I was consistently treated like filth you scrape off the bottom of your shoe. I didn't ask to be born. I didn't ask to be kept. I didn't ask for any of this. I was handed a shit hand and now I'm making the best of it. But without Sara, I would have never been able to make what I have of myself. She understood me. She saw my pain and validated it and showed me that I wasn't alone in this and proved that she had my back. She proved to me that I could trust her. And. She. Rooted. For. Me. When I was struggling to make it through the hardest parts she was there, urging me onwards with encouraging words. She never tossed me a "Oh, just get over yourself." Or anything like that. She was on my fucking side and she proved that. Beyond a reasonable doubt, she proved that she was trustworthy and behind me every step of the way. She sacrificed and risked for me and the fact that anyone would express disdain for her being credited pisses me off. What was Sarah Wolf doing when I was breaking down over losing all my things in 2016? Blaming me, that's what. What was she doing when I applied for section 8? Telling me it was selfish to apply and that I didn't need it as much as some people so I shouldn't apply. Sara helped me put in the application. She actually pushed me to even do it because I didn't really want to at first. Sara was the driving force behind the best decisions I have made these past few years. Hell, even Yoshi. I made that decision to take him in on my own. But Sara said she thought it was good for me to have an animal. Sarah Wolf said I should listen to Mark and give him away. And now she pretends like it was all her idea when I didn't consult anyone else before making this decision. This was my decision. And Yoshi was one of the absolute best decisions I ever made. Full stop. I made that decision. And one encouraged me to do good while the other tried to guilt trip me for it. Sarah Wolf primarily provided physical needs. And that's great. Totally appreciated. But the advice does not fit my life and I vehemently reject it.

Sara knows me. She spent 20 minutes to an hour a week talking to me about the deepest stuff that Sarah Wolf still has never heard me talk about. Sarah Wolf doesn't know how much I first freaked out when I first had that memory of the rape lodged in my brain. She doesn't know that Grover took some time out of the bar to hug me and tell me he was taking me to Cici's the next day to get my mind off of it. She doesn't know that I wanted to kill myself that night. She doesn't know that Yoshi meowing at me pulled me back from the edge that night. And she certainly doesn't know that imagining Sara's reaction to the news of my death is what gave me resolve to not do it. Because during that time, she was recovering from her spinal surgery. She was out for another month and a half still. And I didn't want her to come back from that to the news that I had killed myself after remembering that I had been violently raped at a very young age by my own father. That's partly what saved me that night. But that alone was what gave me the resolve to stay alive at least until she got back. And when she got back, I ended up telling her... But I had to get a few other things out first. And I said "One more thing and prepare yourself because it's... Really heavy." And she did. And I told her. And there was a moment where time stood still. And she said she didn't know what to say... Kind of stumbled a moment and said that again but added she was here for me and she would do anything she could to support me. And that meant the world to me. I knew she would, too. I knee before I told her. I knew she would be there for me. And she was. She promised and delivered. She never promised anything there was a chance she couldn't deliver. She always told me the truth. She proved time and time again how much she gave a fuck. And I don't respect when people try to doubt her presence in my life as a positive experience.