#also i dont think ib is for me

[woahajimes]

IM SO HAPPY

[castielsprostate]

im like. super worried about my health rn and i dont know why (ignore the very weird spot(??) i have on my finger, the way my hair feels thinner and FEELS like it falls out more, the insane stomach thing i have/had, my consistent headaches, the feeling i constantly have to throw up, and my aching joints and cramps). im fine probably

[dotmander]

.

[charlie-boyfriend]

also ib thing i only posted on evil insta...

[cemetery-irises]

been a hot minute since i talked about spyke but eurhrj. hes is infesting my brain again

so sea urchins are tall as HELL obviously but like

is spyke considered? shorter than average?? by sea urchin standards????

considering that he's been living on his own since he was a kid (iirc i cpupd be wrong dont kill me) could he have like?? stunted growth???

the only other urchin in the game is murch who is also considerably taller than the player despite i think only being 2-3 years older (and also not an adult like spyke is so theres a chance he goes through some big growth spurt) and also, he doesnt look nearly as scrawny as the old man (loving) in the inkopolis alley so??????!!??

[jfkisonthemoon]

my friend playing ib is so funny to me because i keep getting texts like "how do i handle red girl" and i immediately know what room theyre in and what theyre struggling with. and then theyll text me and be like "this is so scary what is wrong with you" and im like buddy,,,, i play this game at night with the lights out,,,,,,,,,

[snekdood]

Whats pretty frustrating for me is that i know theres people who think of my preferences as like. Super unrealistic or something... as if i dont already know that. like.

The whole point is that im literally so scared of getting with other people that if they arent like the person i want to be with in my head, i dont trust them. It has nothing really to do with how "attractive" they are, rather, i self isolated for a while in highschool, realized that my base emotional feelings towards others was mistrust, and decided at that time it was impossible to find trustworthy people so I instead decided to go inwards and essentially "make up" people that i could trust. Because part of me really REALLY doesnt want to believe this is a cold heartless world where you cant trust anyone, I then would try instead to find these people externally. I know its not realitisc but I still havent met someone outside of my characters who I feel like I can fully trust.

[holytrickster]

lately the whole chronic migraine thing for me is like "good luck getting in to see someone before next year.IDIOT. good luck finding a medication that actually works for you you IDIOT. good luck even getting it covered depending what it is. IDIOOOTTT. im really over spending the summer in bed man..it feels so embarrassing having to be like "yeah I'm not even in so much pain lately it's just the fact that it's literally every day and it's the nausea and the brain fog". at least I'm not in the er again

[mrfoox]

I'm.... Already sick of being home with my parents... 😔

[desire-mona]

things abt dps i feel like we dont address enough (photos attached will be shit quality, i took screenshots from yt clips LMAO)

heavily ib @pencileraser1's post abt stuff he noticed n such

the fucking KIDS at welton. the CHILDREN. maybe its just me but i always find myself forgetting that welton isnt a highschool + there are in fact a lot more students than the ones we're focusing on. thats what makes welton so like. evil? to me? they start pushing these kids into a box EARLY.

related, i wouldve LOVED to see how(/if?) keating taught these kids, or rly any other class! he has other classes!!! i think!

ok. of course. neil is a smoker, we've touched on that. but charlie is too?? and he's the one who provides the cigs???? obviously the easy explanation is that he does it to be rebellious and stuff but also Is There Something Else. much to think abt. also wondering where he gets his cigs but thats not rly anything i dont think.

this ones just funny but when mr perry tells the boys they can take a seat and todd simply does not. i KNOW he wasnt sitting before and he needs to unpack and stuff but ITS STILL FUNNY.

"take your seats boys"

"🧍"

also my guilty pleasure is the dps but its todd being anxious video bc man usually crack videos arent my jam but unfortunately i find it so funny

also!!! neil calling his dad sir. obviously its something so glaringly obvious that we dont need to have a discussion abt how theres a disconnect between them. like wow rly thanks mona i didnt know. but come on!!! it makes me sad!!! also they shake hands later in this scene and its the most affectionate/ friendly we see these two get. and its a handshake. and i think what makes it worse is that neil is a SUPER physically affectionate person with his friends. if u watch the movie and pay attention to how often he's touching someone else then ur gonna be like man. he rly was jumping at every opportunity huh.

something about the way neil and the boys act around mr perry makes me view him as more of a drill sargent than anything. everyone immediately stands upon him entering the room. they dont sit until given permission. it rly puts the whole military school thing into perspective but NOT ENOUGH TO SATISFY ME. as much as i hate mr perry, i wanna know what his life was like growing up. this man lived thru the great depression AND wwii, theres stories.

cam's stupid fucking face when keatings behind him larping ghosts. i will never stop talking about how sassy this kid is. the dps redheads go criminally unacknowledged in terms of comedy because OH MY GOD. CAM AND MEEKS WERE SO FUCKING FUNNY??? they both pulled the most dastardly judgemental looks and they make me cackle. a bit earlier in this scene meeks goes full 🙄🤨 on sniffles (tissue kid. i call him sniffles) and it is, without exaggeration, my fav part of the movie.

the fact that i totally thought knox was gonna fall off his bike and eat shit in this scene. it would be so out of place since dps isn't exactly full of physical comedy but GOD i still fully anticipated it. either that or him getting attacked by a bird. theres totally symbolism surrounding birds in this movie btw and idk what to make of it. if any of u lovely ppl have a theory then lmk immediately.

keating so accurately calling cam out being like "is this right is this right. am i walking right." BC YESSS. i will eventually make a fully fledged cam post but to briefly touch on it, i find cam to be very confused on what is right, usually in terms of morals. a whole situation of confusing your personal values with the rules, thinking theyre one in the same, and completely abandoning what u actually believe. unfortunately i think neils death rly amplified that nd is what led him to tattle. cuz cam is still willing to break the rules in the beginning of the movie!! he's outwardly judgemental but he still does it!! much to discuss, i promise i will eventually.

keatings face after todd yawps!!! theres not much to say here he is just so proud!!! sweet little moment!!!! keatpostin!!!!!!!!

YOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

u guys know im an avid knox hater but this made me giggle. rip knox overstreet u wouldve loved twitch streaming.

THE SPECIFICS OF THIS SHOT. i was gonna make a post a while ago being like "idk i find it funny that the main focus of this shot isnt even one of the poets" and then i realised that WAITTTTTTT THATS THE POINT!!!! keating reached kids besides the poets!!! u didnt have to be in the dead poets society to be affected by the way he taught his classes!!! u just had to be his student!!!!! also i love the fact that the kids who stayed seated r ASHAMED. EMBARRASSED.

the ending shot. oihghgghgg. it was SUCH a choice to set it up this way and honestly i adore peter for making it. this shot is SOOOO UNCOMFORTABLE TO LOOK AT and i love it. when i first watched this i was like "uhm ok interesting choice putting todd between this kids legs but I GET IT. one of the biggest things i remember from the film classes i took is that the way u set up shots is sooo important narratively, and one way to rly push the narrative is the space around a character in a shot. for example! if u have a character on screen surrounded by a TON of negative space then it rly emphasises how alone/ isolated they are. on the other end of the spectrum (the todd spectrum), if you surround a character in a shot with other objects or obstructions, like todd and this kids legs, then it rly emphasises how trapped and confined they are. looking at this makes me feel like. claustrophobic almost, like it's genuinely a bit harder to breathe looking at it. TODD IS STILL TRAPPED IN THAT SCHOOL. YES HE STOOD ON THE DESK AND YES HE NOW HAS THE MOTIVATION TO BE MORE CONFIDENT BC OF NEIL BUT HE! IS STILL! TRAPPED THERE!

more on todd since im on a roll here.

i was also gonna add that we dont rly talk about todd personality wise outside of poetry and anxiety but then i realised, what else is there? we dont really see much about him as a person outside of that, and i think thats the point! todd is constantly overshadowed by his brother, we know that, but i dont think we realise HOW MUCH that ties in with his entire character. quite honestly, outside of poetry and anxiety, ALL we have surrounding todd is his brother and his achievements. and of course! that makes sense! his parents want him to be just like his brother, they dont care about who he is as a person. UGH.

the desk set scene rly is the most insight we'll get into todds actual personality and desires imo, and thats what kills me. he wants a car!!!! get this boy a car!!!!!!!!! we rly see him start to open up before neils death and i wouldve LOVED to get to know todd when he's actually in a place to be himself!! but of course we never got that! sobs.

anywho. thats all i have for now. PLEASE share ur thoughts if u have any pls pls pls. encouraging discussion!! i love love love hearing about the specifics nd stuff, theres soooo much to pick apart abt this movie so i wanna hear everyones thoughts.

[woahajimes]

guys how do you do this fucking lab assignment

[insertdisc5]

this is a stupid question and there’s no reason for my sending it besides trying to understand/overcome my own anxiety/insecurity. your post on game dev software was extremely informative and seems like something you’re really passionate about. for some reason i can’t get past the idea that using premade visual novel/rpg/whatever software will be seen by others as, like, “that doesn’t count as making a real game, you just dragged and dropped stuff into a program someone else made, anyone can do that” or something. I’ve never played any visual novels, but i enjoyed rpgmaker games like The Witch’s House and Ib when i was a kid, and undertale is my favorite game of all time, so I know how good games like that can be. I thought I could learn to make video games at some point by studying computer science in college, but by my 3rd semester i couldn’t focus so i changed my major. That was almost ten years ago, and I feel like an idiot seeing so many people younger than me having so much fun doing stuff that i just gave up on after it became “too challenging” even though I’ve been using computers all my life. I guess what I’m asking is, how do you get over the fear of doing something, saying “hey look what i made/accomplished!” and having someone else say “that’s actually easy to do, you shouldn’t be proud, and here is an example why” and then you’re just left standing there like “damn, maybe i need to reflect on how stupid i am” instead of “man, that guy was a jerk.” sorry if that didn’t make sense.

you have to not think of yourself as yourself, but think of yourself as your friend telling you "someone said mean things to me" and of course when a friend says that to you you say "i will kill them for you you are amazing and the apple of my eye and they dont know what theyre talking about and what you made was great and once again: i will kill them for you". also if anyone says to you "you shouldnt be proud of this thing you made" then you are legally allowed to kill them it's in the world constitution

[angeamant]

my disappearance ♡

hiii this is cynthia most commonly known as gentlehue/jgracie/irlangelics <3 i wasnt gonna make a post like this for reasons i'll go thru under the cut but after having three of you reach out to me on pinterest i thought it'd be unfair to leave everyone in the dark 💗 tagging @luvusrry @findmeonvenus / @daystarpoet and @bloodwrittenletters thank u for checking up on me lovelies xx

okay so the main reason i deactivated yesterday was because i realised being on here was negatively impacting my productivity LOL as you all probably know (because i never shut up about it) im in my second to last year of high school and everything i do now and next year is what has the largest impact on what uni i get into which then has a pretty big impact on where i end up in the future basically LMAO 😭 my life is so busy these days between doing the whole ib itself which im still getting used to since the british system is so structured and tells you exactly what to do in comparison to ib where a lot of it is you doing your own thing & prepping for uni by researching diff courses and the lnat which is an exam i'll have to sit in order to apply to study law & also getting back into all my extracurricular/picking up new ones which is another thing i have to get used to since im SUCH an academically oriented person & a BUNCHHH of other things i wont be getting into rn 😭 and so i cannot afford to be lounging around in any way whatsoever right now!! this is the socmed app i spend the most time on and i tend to tell myself its ok cause im not replying to notifs im just scrolling which is so silly LOL but i need to eliminate that from my life soooo i left

a mini second reason why i left is smth thats gonna be rly hard for me to explain here & im pretty sure probs has smth to do w my ocd (another thing i dont rly like to talk ab that much so idk how many of u know this) but i have this thing where if something negatively impacts me or like if i have a negative association w it it becomes "imperfect" and i acc cannot have it around me like it physically disgusts me and i cant function or think or anything 😭 and thats what was happening w my tumblr account because of how it caused me soooo much procrastination and so little work done 😣 soz if this doesnt make any sense or if its weird but its smth ive had for years now and am slowly working on 😭 my perfectionism is so horrible too and tumblr makes it worse cause im always overthinking what my feed looks like 😫 like i cant have too many talking posts or too many asks or too many reblogs and im always doing them in a way that balances it out in my head and i spiral so bad over it 🙁

ANOTHER reason (wow lots of reasons) is cause ive begun to enjoy my real life so so much these days and dont want to be distracted by being online 😭 i love my friend group i love sixth form i love having a crush i love it all! a lot of my friends r graduating this year as well and so i probs wont be seeing them as often afterwards cause obvs theyre not all applying to unis in our city let alone our country !!! i dont wanna take this year for granted at ALL cause i'll so regret it if i do :(

the second thing im addressing is why i left w out saying anything LOL basically i knew if i posted smth and said my goodbyes i wouldn't commit to it at all 😭 and i need to seriously be disciplined w myself these days if i wanna be rich and traveling the world in 10 years 🫡

i dont know if i'll ever come back but im so so happy i got to know u all whether u knew me from jgracie or discovered me later on after i abandoned her im so glad i got to call u my lovely friends :) i carry a piece of you all wherever i go ♡ you know you'll always know me! i wont deactivate this account but i wont be active on it either unless i decide to fully come back, but if u send me an ask within this week i'll answer it xx

for those of you who are worried about my fics on jgracie, i made a backup account back in the summer and everything ive ever written is reblogged over there :) @cynarchives

[mysterycitrus]

hi! i' m really loving persephone but i was a little confused about how you're writing jason (and roy). i read through the author's note but i havent read a tonne of earlier comics yet so i just wanted to ask about your characterisation of him? its really different from other fic ibe read

hello! firstly, thank u for the question. i included that chunky list of comics at the beginning of persephone cause i knew how i was writing some of the characters (SPECIFICALLY jason and roy lmao) would be pretty different from popular mainstream interpretations of them. even if most people can acknowledge rhato 2011 was a bad comic these days, it's still (unfortunately) a foundational comic for a lot of jason fans.

the long answer is jason is a very popular character, but because he hasn't had an actual good comic since 2005 a lot has to be filled in to make him a "consistant" character. if u actually analyse any of his modern comics with knowledge of other characters, u would probably notice that: a) 99% of his relationships are stolen from dick grayson wholesale, with no development, b) 99% of what makes him popular was stolen wholesale from characters like selina kyle, helena bertinelli, and stephanie brown, and c) that everything politically interesting about his concept has been watered down to like... a sometimes angry dude who doesn't even use guns anymore.

roy is a separate issue - i truly dont believe most people who identify as royandjason fans have read anything preboot about roy, cause otherwise they'd understand that he would not do any of the things he does in rhato, and he definately wouldn't be besties with his best friends thirteen year old brother.

jason as he exists in fan spaces is a guy who is devoid of nuance, and is basically a reskinned 90s dick grayson stand in. that's not interesting to me. his original conception - the fact that he's from park row, he struggles with violence, he was a fundamentally kind person who isn't anymore because of things outside his control..... that's someone who could engage with batman's legacy in a cool way! a guy with his own moral values who does terrible things but still believes in the inherent value of his personal crusade! when i was writing him, it was important that yes, he can be quippy and fun, but he's also a person who's done a lot of fucked up things, and people aren't going to just roll over and think he's the coolest guy ever cause the writer treats him like a self insert.

the short answer is that im a roy harper fan and i haven't known peace since 2011.

[neenieweenie]

Quote Prompts

this is a list of real things that i have heard people say and i strongly encourage that it be used in works of fiction. i started this list in my freshman year of high school and am now a junior in college. if you have any questions about context for any of them (or you’re just curious) feel free to ask! also please tag me if you use it bc i wanna see how ppl use it

“you know what? i am gonna have some grapes.”

“lemon juice and nicolas cage”

[seriously] “you silly goose”

“winner winner, chicken… soup”

“don’t be a debby downer” “did you just say ‘debby downer’?” “i did say debby downer”

“just say ‘controversial’ and call it a day”

“I’m gonna eat her grandma”

“nothing says ‘festive’ like ibs”

“what if the sun was on fire” “the sun IS on fire” “oh”

“my mom thinks my stepdad is a drug addict” “my mom IS a drug addict” “oH-“

“what delicious nutrients in milk!”

“that’s don cheadle” “[gasp]”

“how am i supposed to criss cross applesauce in these conditions”

“oh, like you don’t fart?” “i DONT fart” *farts*

“you’re the worst person i’ve ever met” “aww, you mean that?”

“i’m a girl, not a boy, but i do have epi pens (bonus: “assigned allergic at birth?”)

“fuck— i mean fart”

“i had all four sevens you bitch”

“stuff is temporary. swag is forever.”

“the “P” in “RIP” stands for piss” “rest in piss 😔✊”

“you’ve been in the shower too long, you’re gonna ruin your skin!” “my skin is baby soft”

“my bones are made of pretzel sticks”

“maybe the real clitoris was the friends we made along the way”

“i’m gonna give you a big fat kiss if you don’t shut the fuck up”

“is it worse to be called a slut or a whore?” “well whores get paid, so… slut, probably. cause they don’t have that entrepreneurial spirit”

“tomorrow is the wedding and also the wiffle ball game”

“you’re too young to be so jaded” “i was born jaded. i came out of the WOMB jaded”

“we’ve taught her too much. now she’s pointing out our mistakes”

“andrew jackson: super mega-cunt”

“let’s not sully the lox bagel experience”

“I’m twisting your brain into yarn. I’m crocheting a sweater with your thoughts”

“it’s a part of who i am” “well maybe… change”

“critically analyze your sources! fuck you!”

“i piss like a racehorse”

“i was an athlete if you put an m at the front of it”

“what ever happened to boy bands?” “we mostly get our imports from korea now”

“that’s bird autism” “cawtism”

“i had a dream that the monarchy returned to russia”

l“you’re the most chalant person i’ve ever met”

“i know where to get a tapeworm on my own, i don’t need you to sell me one”

“gotta keep him moist like a lizard”

nothing says happy 20th birthday like dying in a covered wagon”

“yeah, after archimedes figured out the water displacement theory he moved on to jet propulsion technology”

“it may be an ants life, but it’s a beetle’s world; let me tell you about beetles real quick”

“go spaghetti, motherfucker”

“this sandwich is sexually active” (it fucks)

“there is no hope for me. like, i’m on the titanic, it’s going down and i’m one of those people who just went to bed”

“that’s what they taught me in vampire school… i mean band camp”

“would that i were an ocean dweller”

“it’s simply the madness, it can’t be helped”

[spitinsideme]

I JUST WATCHED TROLLS 2 AND 3 AND POMNI AND FAGATHA ARE LITTERALY THAT ONE COUPLE IN TROLL 3 THEY ARE ACTUALLY BRUCE AND HIS WIFEE!!!! THEY ARE THEM!!!!

first of sll, i want to sy that youre completely right and this is kind of them and secomd of all, i am about to be hormh for trolls 2 world tpur delta the country troll because i need to talk aboitit so badly. im putting a warning now that i am going to he HORNY i will get NSFW !!! i jst neees to get this off my chest i domt.care read at your own risk ive warned yo all

for the record, i love and respext women and i think all women are complex and have so muxb to.them. i also am normal

this womaj right here ... this love of my life .. never ib my life hav ei thought that trolls coukd have sex appeal, i domt look st them and think yeah whatever fuckable because they never have. bit her ? her aura lf sadness, her i take no shit thing, her toughness ... god i get the sex appeal now i fucking get it because i want her so .. so badly ...

i want to.fuckimg RIDE her and i donr even mean her horse side i dont want to ride her like a cowgirl bit god if she wants to do it in cowgirl position i happily fucking ill get in posoition ill get rrady and god o will JUMP on whateber thr fucm she will have me juml on i dont even lime dick but if she had one ? im giving the most sloppy, toe curling, gut wrenching, hair pulling, blood sucking, world ending, pussy shatterimg, cock destroying, orgasm overload head of the WORLD. illngive a mew meaning to a blowjob and if she has a pussy shit ill fuckong eat it too id do whatever she wnated id get on my knees for her id hump the FUCK out of her four horse legs shw wpukd have my wetness stuck in her fur for weeks afrer that and id lick kt lff okay id clesn it off for her id use my tongue skills tp do the jlb RIGHR and id ensing eery ssimgle second of having my tomfue on her. i want her to mount me like a fuckong horse i want her on.top of me as i lay stosmxh on.the floor i want her destroying me i want my inskde ANNIHILATED !!!! i want her to fuck me so hard my ovaries become scrambled eggs abd she tames them out, fries them, seasoms them, and serves them to me on a plate and tells me i did a good job with her beautoful southern voice. i want her to literlly obliterate me i want her to trample me i want my stomach lining to be destroyed becayse she wilm shove her hoove so far down my thrlst that it will cause friction burn and make my saliva acidic i liteelaly want her to est me oit and make me see god and have him be disgusted and terrfied at the sounds im makimg he needs to be scared and regret ever making genitals for humans becayse the face and the sounds i will be making will caise him to start planning a homosapien extermaination to start over humanity because hes terrfied of what he created by giving humajs sexual pleasure thats how good she will eat me out.

and.god her voide ? her fucking voice ? her southern accent ???? take me already ??? i want tp make her scream i need to mske her scream i want to.her her say my namewith her southern accent and i want her to call me sweerie throufhout it and ill make sure i please her so much that she will say it bwcause indeserce ir after makung her eyes rolls baxk and her legs kick i wanr her to kick me as shes having an orgasn i aant her o literally send me flying woth her kicks she shpukd kick me so hard that inget internal bleeding but, even with blood driping down my mouth from my lungs being punctured from my broken ribs, i come back.to help ride her throifh her orgasm and give her as many more as she wants i want her pulling my hair until she rips it all out and ingo bald id have a wig eveey single time and id suoer glue it onto my head so i coukd fall how jars shes pulling i wsnt her to pull that superglued wig off every time and i want to have my skull showikg by the ampunt of skin and musfle she pulled off

AND THE HAID ???THE FUCKING HAIE ???? GOD !!!! IM GETTING STARTED ON THAT BECAUSE JESUF FUCKING CHRIST I MEAN JOLLY FUCKING JEEZ ILL DO ANYTHING JUST TAKE ME ALREASY !!! her hair looks sosos soft and i want to touch jt .. i woukd beg for some of her hair, and then id take crochet courses abd lesrn how to crochet and after id do all that and do lots of practice id make knickers and a bra using the hair she had so kindly given me and id wear it every single day every single hour eveeh single minite for all the secknds that pass and it wpukd feel like delta herself touching me everyrwhere in those places for so long id even make fill on clothes out of he rhair and id wear them rverday and id get the appeal of clorhed sex, id never take my clothes off anymore, i woukdnt even have to because just having those clothes on would count as clothed sex becaause of how lustful id feel just wesing them. everyrime id move and the fricrion make the clorhes get mkre omto my body id start sweating, abd the swear would make the cllthes stick mkre tonmy body abd at that point id have the mosr earth desteoyong orgasm, the ground bellw me would be so destroyed that i could see the other side of the world from the hole i jjst created using my hole do you undeeatand ? im gay for herm i want her. i want to make a dildo using her hoove shape, and then i want to make a.cover for it using her hair anr that thong woukd be inside me every single fucking dsy nonstop id neve rtake ir our, by day two it woukd be disimtegrated because of how wet id made ir i woukd mske it out of steel or whateve5 fuckingg stromg ass materail but the poert of my pussy and love woukd get it to disintgerate and go soggy lke paper. that thing woukd merge inside me that it woukd count as a third limb it wpukd count as a whole new beong inside me id name it. my medical records would have tonbe changed to account for the thing i made in her honour because it ould nor officialby be part of me. it woukd be in there forever.

basiclsly, what im trying to say is, i think shes a reallyy cool charavter 👍