#also i could explain the memes. but um. nah.

[sofiescarchy]

oc posting (more like jakobs hate posting)

[cattles-bians]

exes au part 14

post directory

obsetress:

obsetress: viola

em: holy shit

em: i think viola could hold a truly ridiculous number of things in her hands

em: danis like i have a little fanny pack right here- and violas like (turns up nose) absolutely not

obsetress: pre therapy viola during her relationship w dani: buys dani a birkin too, is like "here baby, so you don't have to use that fanny pack"

obsetress: dani's like "oh. i, um. like my fanny pack"

obsetress: viola therapy era after her relationship with dani: buys her a hermes fanny pack instead

obsetress: jamie rolls her eyes but dani is literally

em: i think a lot abt viola offering solutions completely unprompted n then being really offended when ppl dont take her up on it

em: pre therapy obvs

obsetress: SAME

obsetress: oh link is gross

obsetress: cost is grosser

obsetress: but viola lloyd dropping $2550 on a fanny pack for her ex gf? chefs kiss

---

obsetress: ok just remembered viola slouching or leaning or w/e n like

obsetress: brain practically applying that to exes au and imagining when and where she'd slouch n everyone's reactions to htat

obsetress: bc like she has perfect posture but when she chooses to do it it's a power move

obsetress: and i. hm

em: yeah

obsetress: viola sitting up stock straight when they first get to brunch and as soon as she's ordered her bloody mary shes pulling off her sunglasses and dropping them on the table and just sinking back

em: how to phrase this w/o sounding too much like a whore

em: actually no way to say this but like i feel v strongly abt the way we make women take up less space wrt to knees together calves touching type deal and i think maybe

em: maybe viola can manspread a bit as a treat

em: hate that term but i cant think of a better one

obsetress: nah she does n it's hot

obsetress: just had this image pre divorce of viola and arthur at marriage counseling on opp ends of the couch n arthur's sitting v tight close and vi is just

obsetress: leaning and spreading a lil

obsetress: the first time jamie sees her do it she's so taken aback

obsetress: because she's NOT expecting it

em: jamies like ah ok late in life lesbian deal and then jokes on her viola is fluent in dyke slouch

obsetress: jamie immediately trying to suss out just how long viola has been fucking women

obsetress: she says to dani later "i thought she was all proper like" and dani's like "she is" and jamie's like "so wot was that then" and dani's like "well, people are gay, jamie,"

em: ghfjhgljkJFDASJKKJFGA

em: jamies like so wait how long HAS viola been

obsetress: jamie: so you were vi's first serious girlfriend right? dani: dani: jamie: right???????

em: violas been fucking women longer than jamie has lbr

em: i mean shes clearly only 35, jamie,

obsetress: jamie: so... vi... viola: hm? jamie: you're, uh, gay, right? viola: obviously jamie: right. well dani told me you've been dating women since–– viola: since i was 15, yes jamie: but you married a man

em: violas like u went to jail everyone does stupid shit occasionally

em: jamie: so how long have you been dating women viola: since i was 15 jamie: no i meant like. in years viola raises her eyebrows and jamies just like haha nevermind fuck

obsetress: she tried!

obsetress: she tried

em: jamie on her 35th birthday pencilling 'many happy returns' into violas ????th 35th birthday card

em: yknow i think

em: i think something's afoot

obsetress: jamie, giving up on the direct approach

obsetress: slipping in next to rebecca at the wine bar

obsetress: "becca"

obsetress: "hi, jamie" "hi. how old is your girlfriend"

em: am fucking losing it thinking abt jamie like. realising how much gay energy viola has

em: like taken ABACK

obsetress: fksljfLKSDJFLJ

obsetress: just like

obsetress: why are jamies reactions to viola so funny

obsetress: montage of jamie realizing how much gay energy viola has

obsetress: jamie watching viola sitting

obsetress: jamie watching viola pick up a variety of glasses and mugs

obsetress: jamie watching viola compare hand sizes with dani, jamie's girlfriend and viola's ex girlfriend who she dated for literal years and whose hand size she definitely already knows

em: NOT THE HAND SZIES

em: they go for a walk and viola immediately complains about the sun and jamie's like

em: i have a spare hat but ur not gonna like it

em: its a snapback that says daddy or smthn in gold, owen got it for jamie for her bday, jamie Loathes it

obsetress: BYE

obsetress: viola looks better in it than jamie does

em: jamie has that

em: am i attracted to viola? moment

em: it passses

em: she has already compartmentalised the weird psychosexual power play

em: queen of compartmentalising

obsetress: jamie: had another one of those moments today dani: what moments? jamie: where i thought i might be attracted to vi dani: well, you did let her fuck you... what was it, four? times in one night, so

em: jamie; yeah but like that aside

em: jamie 'thats neither here nor there' taylor

obsetress: she is the queen of compartmentalizing tho

em: i was gonna be like. 'jamies like wait i dont remember saying four' but. i think she would tell dani

em: because the flip of that is dani callin up vi n i dont think she would necessarily

obsetress: i think she would and dani would make her anyway

obsetress: well make her is harsh but

obsetress: dani would very curiously ask in very convincing ways

em: lovingly coax it out of her

em: dani: what if i fucked you four times in o

obsetress: dani: let me do five

em: viola probably wears so many rings jamie doesn’t even clock the ever present thumb ring

obsetress: jamie just. writes it all off

em: am laughing abt like. viola v meticulously taking off every single ring and putting it in its proper location before...

obsetress: there is something. so hot about that

obsetress: im gonna scream i think

em: i was just meming and now im thinking abt it and

em: truly played myself

em: actually this is me refusing to unpack whatever the hell theo crain gloves made me feel

obsetress: sdkfmsldjfa

obsetress: fair

em: sublimate it into rings

obsetress: i just like um

obsetress: thinkin about when she and dani are together and like

obsetress: it's intentional and everything has its place but vi also makes a show out of it

obsetress: and like

obsetress: she's SO painstaking about it and definitely makes dani wait a little bit and

em: helps dani outta her big ass earrings

em: i mean dani doesnt even Need the help

em: viola meticulous lloyd

em: i mean she just wears so much goddamn jewellry

obsetress: she can tell when dani's getting impatient and goes even slower

em: viola has like

em: viola is one of thos ppl thats really into expensive watches

obsetress: !!!!!!

obsetress: yeah

obsetress: nice lil canon nod too

em: she drags dani to antique auctions n danis like i cant. actually tell the difference between the real and the forgery and violas like (passionately explains it for like 30 minutes) and dani is

em: like shes mentally checked out but also v intensely watching violas hands as she points to the parts of the watch

em: rebecca gets it tho

em: rebecca Gets It

obsetress: dani shoving vi into the bathroom at the auction house and tugging vi's hand between her legs v rebecca grabbing her own auction paddle and bidding against viola for the same watch

obsetress: (rebecca n vi fuck in the car on the ride home)

em: dani grabs a paddle n mimes spanking viola n then the auctioneer is like '$250 to 201' and danis like aw Fcuk

em: violas like i cant take u Anywhere

obsetress: dani gives her the 🥺😌and viola's immediately over it and pulling out $250

obsetress: dani: i didn't even want it, i was just–– vi: i know dani: what am i even gonna do with a–– vi: i'll sell it for $500 at a private auction next week dani: so technically i'm making you money dani, grinning: it's like i'm your employee dani: do you have any more assignments for me, boss? vi: dani get your hand out of my pocket i need to focu––

[sir-crisis]

So I was just listening this song (Sunkissed by khai dreams) and like its so s o f t and of course I couldn’t help but imagine some of the Haikyuu ships singing it to each other so then I had to write one shots/ideas for all of them and this happened:

DaiSuga: literally the softest ship in the show there no way I couldn’t think of them. Like it could go some many ways but like my favorite would be if like Daichi plays/sings for him as a confession (cause we all know that man is talented as hell) and maybe it’s like after they graduate or the team sets it up or something and like halfway through Suga starts tearing up and when Daichis done Sugas like ‘You’re such a sap’ and accepts/confesses back with something cheesy like ‘But that’s why I love you too’. And like they’re both tears eyed and I-they’re just so soft and sweet and I’d die for them so fast.

BokuAka: I couldn’t not think of the practically canon power couple that it Akaashi and Bokuto. Like I can’t help but imagine at lunch or something Bokuto finds Akaashi singing this to himself and like just quietly stands there for a while with like this cute fond smile on his face before approaching and sitting with him, and at first Akaashi internally freaks out like ‘shit! how much of that did he hear???’ But then Bokuto doesn’t bring it up so he just lets it go. bUT later at practice stuffs going normal before Bokuto just randomly asks ‘have you guys ever heard Akaashi sing?’ And they’re like ‘Ughhh Bokuto can we please just focus on practicing’ (Cause we all know this man talks about Akaashi to everyone constantly) but then they all look over at Akaashi who’s frozen in shock with like a light blush and Konohas like ‘Nvm practice I wanna hear this man sing’ and that’s how Akaashi ends up singing infront of the whole Fukurodani team while bright red and Bokuto recording the whole thing and sending it to Kuro being like ‘Guess what bro I have the best boyfriend of all time’.

IwaOi: Dont even get me started on how cute these two are. I totally imagine this as like either a confession or a proposal or something. Obviously Iwaizumi would sing it cause he’s definitely the sappier between the two, but like Iwaizumi would totally lead him to like a secluded area and the whole way Oikawa would make sarcastic comments like ‘Are you finally going to murder me Iwa-Chan?’ And when they stop it’s like by a bunch of flowers or under a pretty tree (cause Iwaizumi would) and before Oikawa can say anything Iwaizumi starts singing playing the song with like a small blush on the tip of his cheeks while alternating between looking at Oikawa and anything but Oikawa. And like the whole time Oikawa has this slight agape and starry eyed look on his face with like a blush. And then when he’s done they just stand staring at each other for like a whole minute both blushing and Iwaizumi getting more and more nervous before Oikawa finally just step forward with a quiet ‘Iwa-Chan’ (or maybe ‘Hajime’) and pull him into a kiss, but I also like to think Oikawa would be a little shit (cause that’s why we love him) and do a 180 by throwing his hands up like ‘Idiot you finally told me!’ before jumping him and they both fall to the ground while Oikawa aggressively kisses all over Iwaizumis face who is trying and failing to not laugh. I also love to imagine that later Oikawa begs Iwazumi to let him record and post him singing cause ‘Everyone needs hear my amazing boyfriend singing Iwa-chan’ and when he posts it everyone’s like ‘omg Oikawa this is so good your singing is so nice’ and ‘Oikawa-senpai this is so good I love your voice!’ and Oikawas ‘like no you idiot that’s Iwa-Chan, duh’ and that’s how Iwaizumi gets known throughout Aoba Johsai as an amazing singer and Oikawas Torus boyfriend.

KuroKen: I couldn’t help but think of these two. Like I imagine it as like Kuro confessing to Kenma. Like maybe it’s after their last game together or after they’ve graduated or something and like the whole day Kuros has this bright look in his eyes so when he pulls Kenma away to go and talk somewhere Kenma 100% expects for him to joke around and try to give some cheesy sort of speech so when Kuro stops and turns to him with that look in his eyes Kenma can’t help but roll his eyes before Kuro suddenly starts singing and Kenma freezes ‘cause like Kuro wtf’ before the meaning of everything falls into place and he’s like ‘Kuro no no stop Kuro’ but Kuro just grins at him and keeps going while Kenna’s face gets redder and redder. Like halfway through Kuro drops to one knee (cause he’s an over dramatic idiot and I love him) and Kenma try’s to cover his face to stop how he flush’s even more. When he’s done I love to imagine Kuro making some dumb video game reference or maybe an inside joke that has Kenma laughing and pulling his hands away to look at Kuro who has the same bright look in his eyes and Kenma just gives him a small smile before quietly returning his confession. I also love the imagine that when they get back to the team Kuro just gives Yaku a small thumbs up when no ones looking (cause we all know Kuro would rant/rehearse with Yaku for a whole week before doing it) and Yaku returns the gesture before Levs just like ‘Yaku-San why are making weird hand gestures with Kuro? Are you in a gang? Yaku-San are you and Kuro in a gang?!’ And Yaku just gives a defeated sigh.

Matsuhana: You know I could never forget the beloved meme team of Aoba Johsai. I imagine they would totally do something like this before and after confessing but I love to imagine them casually sitting with (probably on) each other before Matsukawas just like ‘oh yeah bro lemme sing this song for you it reminds me of you’ and maybe it leads to a confession or maybe they’re already dating but either way he sings it and the whole time he just gently smiles at Makki while Makki stares back with his usual smirk but his eyes are kinda starry and maybe halfway through Makki starts humming along or something cute like that. When he’s done though Makki would totally be his usual self and be like ‘Well I can do you one better’ and starts playing the music to despacito on his phone before standing up and doing a somewhat coordinated dance routine while singing along and looking playfully at Matsukawa the whole time who is full on laughing between comments of ‘Makki oh my god how are so bad at dancing’ and ‘how is this better we literally don’t know a single word you’re saying’.

KyoHaba: Continuing on my love for Aoba Johsai I couldnt forget these two. I 100% believe that Kyotani crush’s first, like maybe it’s after they’re game with Karasuno and for a whole week Kyoutani can’t stop thinking about it so he’s goes up to Iwazumi like ‘Um Senpai is it weird if you want someone else to pin to a wall?’ And before Iwazumi can say anything Makkis just like ‘Nah bro that’s just kinky’ and Iwazumi just sighs before trying to help Kyoutani both better explain and also help with his issue (we all know Iwazumi cares about Kyoutani) Which is how all the third years find out about Kyoutanis crush on Yahaba. I love to imagine that through the rest of the year Kyoutani try’s small romantic gestures like flowers, notes and small things but never actually confesses and lets be honest, Yahaba would be completely clueless but can’t help but admit that they’ve grown closer ‘cause duh, of course the captain and ace need to be close I-Watari why are you laughing at me?’. I feel like Kyoutani would probably do it after a bad game as third years, maybe it was just a practice match or maybe they lost in spring high but either way everyone can tell Yahaba’s slowly getting panicked and lost in himself and maybe he does it right when he gets back or maybe a few days later but he walks in on Yahaba late at practice after everyone’s left and Kyoutani grumbles something about ‘idiot tiring himself out’ or something before marching over and dragging a tired but feisty Yahaba to the locker room to clean up. Yahaba would totally refuse and somewhere along the line they would probably start arguing and maybe Kyoutanis trying to to get his point across and repeats something cheesy he said in one of his notes and they both just freeze with Kyouanti thinking ‘fuck fuck fuck’. Then probably in a panic Kyotani just goes for it and starts singing. The whole time I imagine Yahaba is still frozen but slowly a blush starts to rise on his cheeks while Kyoutanis standing there bright red and avoiding eye contact besides to check if Yahaba’s still breathing. When he’s done Yahaba would still be frozen and Kyoutani would just frantically keep looking between him and the floor before Yahaba suddenly moved and kisses him, and at first Kyoutani would probably just stand there in shock before he slowly started to return the kiss and maybeee they just end up making out in the locker room who knows. Tomorrow at morning practice Watari would definitely pick up on the hickeys on Yahaba’s neck but before he can say anything he spots the blush running up Kyoutanis neck and just stops for a second before full on cackling at both Kyoutani and Yahaba’s matching blushes. That’s how the whole team of Aoba Johsai find out that their current Ace and captain are dating just as their previous had. (I’m so sorry this 100% turned into a long oneshot but I couldn’t stop it once it started)

EnnoTana: Another amazing ace/captain duo (in their third year) who I absolutely would die for. For some reason I kept imaging this as if the song were an apology, mainly Tanaka trying to apologize for an argument to a stubborn Ennoshita after he’s exhausted all his options. Tanaka would also totally be a sap about it like probably have flowers and candles and everything, Ennoshita being himself would totally have some sort of bored but smug look on his face when Tanaka starts singing (let’s be honest Tanaka would sing for him no matter how cheesy the song) and maybe after a certain line hits him Ennoshitas smugness dies away to a soft smile and starry eyes returned by Tanakas love struck expression. Maybe Tanaka pulls him over and starts dancing with him (I know cheesy, but Tanakas would be so cheesy). Maybe after Ennoshita would lean in to whisper ‘I wasn’t still mad you idiot’ against his lips before leaning back and laughing at pouting Tanaka who’s whining along the lines of ‘Chikaraaa you ruined the moment’.

Oh my god that was so much I’m so sorry I just HAD to rant to somebody/something about how cute this song is (I totally recommend it) and how cute these volleyball dorks are. I know my writing wasn’t really one-shot style but I just had to get it out. Also I hope I got all of them in character and I’m sorry if I somehow didn’t.

[bleachcracklist]

Captains grocery shopping in the human world (toilet paper edition)

It has came to captain´s attention that toilet paper has became a very important item in the human world. So here is how each one of them handle this situation.

Also this is to make fun of the toilet paper meme that has been going on now. Why does people feel the needs to panic buy so much toilet paper?

Yamamoto

He would hit people who are fighting and tell them not to panic buy, then get angry at them.

Sasakime: Sir, how were you able to buy toilet paper?

Yamamoto: I used my zanpakuto.

Sasakime: Did you burn them?

Yamamoto: No, I hit them

SoiFon

While everyone is in the middle of a battle for the last bag of toilet paper, Soifon is too fast for regular humans. So she activates Shunko in the middle of the supermarket, destroying parts of the property.

Omaeda: Captain… you just destroyed 3 shelves.

Soifon: You´ll pay for the repairs. Right?

Omaeda: …

Omaeda: Yes, Captain, but please don’t hurt me.

Yoruichi

She would enter the shop naked to distract the people then get the toilet paper, but her plan backfired when she got arrested for nudity.

Urahara: Yoruichi-san, did you get the toilet paper?

Cat Yoruichi: Nope, sorry, just escaped prison.

Urahara: What did you do?

Cat Yoruichi: My plan was to go in there naked, but apparently it’s illegal to walk around naked.

Gin

He would do anything for Rangiku, even if it means losing his life in the process. He fights bravely for the last bag of toilet paper.

Gin: Izuru-kun, please get this to Ran-chan, I’m counting on ya.

Kira: CAPTAIN! Please don’t die!

Rose

He’s quite indifferent about this entire shopping for the toilet paper thing, why bother when he can just stay in his office reading manga. And when he needs something he could just take them from Kensei.

Kira: Captain, shouldn’t you go shopping?

Rose: It’s fine, there is no need.

Kira: ...

Unohana

She tries not to use her bloodthirst side too much so she tries to stop the fight in a friendly way, but when the people don’t listen to her, she uses her intimidating smile. They all parted away.

Unohana: Hanataro, why were they so scared when I told them to stop fighting?

Hanataro: I-I am not sure Captain.

Unohana: Oh well, at least we got some toilet paper.

Isane

She would be too scared to get close to the people fighting. So she'd wait until everyone calmed down.

Kiyone: Why didn’t you get anything sis?

Isane: There were so many people fighting and I was afraid. When they left, there was no more toilet paper left…

Kiyone: ...

Kiyone: You’re not going shopping next time.

Aizen

Aizen wouldn’t bother with the actual shopping, he uses his zanpakuto to trick people into believing that there is no toilet paper left.

Aizen: Shatter Kyoka Suigetsu!

Aizen: Minions, go get them all.

Aizen: This is all according to my perfect plan.

Shinji

Gets distracted by all the young women in the supermarket and he tries to flirt with them all.

Momo: Captain Hirako, care to explain why you came back empty-handed?

Shinji: …

Momo: You got distracted and started calling everyone your first love, didn’t you?

Shinji: Maybe?

Momo: Captain! You need to stop doing that!

Byakuya

Byakuya is so rich, that he wouldn’t even bother with going shopping himself. He would send his servants to the world of living to do those peasants errands.  

Renji: Captain, why didn’t you go shopping like everyone is doing now?

Byakuya: There is no need for me to personally do such activities such as shopping.

Komamura

He wouldn’t be allowed in the shop… need I say more?

Officer: Sir, please you need to take off your um… fursuit before entering the shop.

Komamura: What are you talking about? This is not a fursuit…

Officer: ...

Iba

Gives his all in the fight, but when he is about to grab the bag, Nanao grabs it. So they start a fight, in the end, someone else got it and they both lose.

Iba: This toilet paper is finally mine!

Nanao: Not so fast, this belongs to me, Captain Iba.

Iba: What are you talking about? I touched it first.

Nanao: You are delusional.

Kyoraku

He isn't interested in toilet paper so he goes to the alcohol section instead, leaving the actual shopping to Nanao.

Nanao: Captain, stay away from the alcohol, we came here to buy food, not sake.

Kyoraku: Nanao-chan, don't be mean!

Nanao: Sir, you are the head captain now, you should learn how to behave.

Lisa

She wouldn’t bother buying toilet paper as the only thing she wants are those questionable magazines.

Hiyori: What the hell are you doing? Shouldn't you be shopping?

Lisa: Who needs toilet paper when I can get all this magazine?

Tosen

Since Tosen really care about justice, when he entered the supermarket the only thing he thought to do was to start a monologue about justice, no one is listening to him as they are all too busy fighting for that last bag of toilet paper.

Hisagi: um… Captain?

Tosen: What is it Hisagi?

Hisagi: Captain… nobody was listening…

Tosen: The path to justice...

Kensei

Kensei being quite aggressive in battle doesn't really care about the outcome, as long as he got what he wanted.

Mashiro: Ohh, I see that you got the toilet paper.

Mashiro: How did you get it?

Mashiro: Did you just send the other people flying?

Mashiro: Come on tell me!

Kensei: Shut up!

Isshin

Just being his goofy self, when people saw him cry to the picture of his wife they took pity on him.

Isshin: MASAKI, I'M ABOUT TO SACRIFICE MYSELF FOR OUR CHILDREN.

Isshin: WE WILL SEE EACH OTHER SOON.

Isshin: I’M SORRY, MY CHILDREN, I CAN'T BE HERE FOR YOU ANYMORE.

Ichigo: I don't know him, I swear.

Hitsugaya

Hitsugaya is tired of being always shoved to the side by the people twice his size. He uses his bankai to grow up a bit.

Hitsugaya: There Matsumoto, the stuff you asked for.

Rangiku: You were even able to get toilet paper?

Rangiku: How? The last time I went there, people were fighting for it.

Hitsugaya: I have my ways. Now go back to work.

Rangiku: Captain… you used your bankai, didn't you?

Hitsugaya: ...

Kenpachi

He would join the fight, because let's admit it, there is no way he will back away from a fight. And so... he forgets his original objective.

Kenpachi: Is that a fight?

Yumichika: It is, but we didn't came today to fight, we need to buy toilet paper.

Yumichika: Captain?

Ikkaku: He didn't hear you. He's already fighting them.

Ikkaku: We need to stop him before he kills those humans.

Urahara

After Yoruichi´s failed attempt to get toilet paper, Urahara thought it was better to send his clones to do the dirty work.

Jinta: Oh my god, how the hell did you get this much stuff in just one shopping trip?

Urahara: I used myself.

Jinta: What?

Urahara: It's nothing.

Mayuri

He tends to have a lot of illegal drugs, and nobody is willing to test them for him, so he thought the human world is the best place to put those drugs in action.

Mayuri: Nemu! Paralyse them.

Nemu: Yes, master Mayuri.

Ukitake

Ukitake would want to go to the human world but couldn't, because he is sick and has to stay in his room instead.

Sentaro: Captain, please, you have to stay put.

Ukitake: But I need to get some new candy for Shiro-chan.

Sentaro: Please don't make me call Captain Unohana.

Ukitake: ...

Ukitake: On second thought, I will stay in my room.

Rukia

Rukia being a bit more familiar with the human world thanks to her constant visits, she learns not to make a huge scene like the rest of the captains. She often watch videos from the human world and she learns how humans fight for toilet paper.

Ichigo: Is she... pulling on that other woman's hair?

Renji: Yeah…

Ichigo: Why is she doing that?

Renji: Well she thought that's the way human fights.

Ichigo: We need to stop her…

Renji: Nah… She will be fine.

[atmilliways]

2 6 16 18 20 24 25!

[fun meta asks meme]

THIS IS SO MANY okay here we go. 

2. Tell us about what you’re most looking forward to writing – in your current project, or a future project

I’m super psyched to keep expanding this Charles/Melmord thing that’s been living in my head. (I wish I could charge it rent, honestly.) Just this idea of a… relationship arc between them where they don’t like each other, they never really quite like each other, but on some levels they’re all they’ve got. They fuck out their stress and their loneliness, and they each need that outlet for their mental health. So they come to rely on each other in a weird way that kind of defies acknowledgement, and there’s always this sparring element to their interactions even after Melmord cools it on the “fuck you you ruined my life” and Charles cools it on the “I’m so fucking above you it’s embarrassing, really” and they just sort of… get along. And understand each other. And anticipate when the other is going to need some sex in order to be able to hold it together and just, like, provide that because it’s what they do. 

Enemies AND lovers to symbiotic relationship AND rivalry. 

6. What character do you have the most fun writing?

The most fun? William fucking Murderface. He just comes out with the weirdest “I want to be the hero of the story” shit mixed with this self-deprecating resignation because at the same time he’s pretty sure he isn’t and he’s big mad about it, and it’s so hysterical. 

On the other side of the table, Murderface reached purposefully to his left and pulled Skwisgaar out of the bowl of cereal by his hair. “Hey dickweedsh,” he said scornfully, “I juscht schaved the world’sh fashtescht guitarisht from drowning. Don’t thank me or anything, a real hero doeschn’t need that kind of validation.” (Don’t Say No, You San Do’s It)

I mean, he’s just so fucking funny. 

16. Tried anything new with your writing lately? (style, POV, genre, fandom?)

I’ve been shaking it up with pairings recently. Honestly, I spent so many years writing only Nathan/Charles that I was slowly unlearning how to write all the other characters, and that’s a shame. 

Also, I popped into the Good Omens fandom for about a year and before wandering back to this one, I feel like that did something good for my creativity to change it up for a bit. 

18. Do any of your stories have alternative versions? (plotlines that you abandoned, AUs of your own work, different characterisations?) Tell us about them.

All of Lost In Japan is basically a series of AUs within AUs. Um… I can’t think of any particularly abandoned plotlines. Most of the time the “I could do This or I could do That” crossroads I come to are either whether Charles should be paired with Pickles or Nathan, or if Charles is going to get hung up on Remaining Professional or if he’s going to Just Go For It. 

Oh, I remember! There was a whole bit I had to cut out of This Is Very Unsafe because it was getting long and rambling and I didn’t think I could get it done in time to post, where Charles did get hung up on remaining professional and Nathan had to try and talk him into it, and Charles gets all overwhelmed. 

I have it saved in my “Random Shit” google doc for deployment at some other time. 

20. Tell us the meta about your writing that you really want to ramble to people about (symbolism you’ve included, character or relationship development that you love, hidden references, callbacks or clues for future scenes?)

There’s this bit in Take Me To Church chapter 4 (really chapter 3, but Ao3 doesn’t have a Prologue option that I know of so it shows as 4) that’s happening at around the same time Nathan destroys the liquid master:

In the haze after the storm, he slipped into a dream of such intense sensations it felt almost alien to him now. Sometimes he was alone, sometimes there were other hands helping him along. Mostly he was alone and floating in nothingness, but sometimes Nathan was there, growling at him to just do it already, come on. 

I had something very specific in mind when I wrote this, back in… frickin 2018. Do I know what it is anymore? Nah. So I have a special highlighted section in my timeline doc listing everything Nathan might have meant by “do it.” 

The two best guesses I’ve got are “Yell at me for that I did” (destroying the liquid master, messing with the band dynamic by driving a wedge between himself and Pickles, etc etc etc, even though some of those things haven’t chronologically happened yet) and “Feel something” (because Charles been so numb and removed from everything for so long, and it’s also feel something for ME, etc etc etc). 

If anyone has any thoughts or speculations to add, please let me know.

24. Would you say your writing has changed over time?

I would say that.

I would not be able to explain exactly how it has changed, but I would definitely say it has. 

Though I certainly use the phrase “almost, but not quite, [something]” a lot less than I did back in my H2G2 fandom days. 

25. What part of writing is the most fun?

The reading it after I’ve written it and going, Yeah, that’s the shit. That’s what was in my head. It’s there now. Cool-a-roonie-doonie.

[wongiemei]

Roommate!Jeno

a/n: maybe i should just turn this blog into an nct dream one

okay

letsgetit!

first of all,

story time!

your uni is fucking expensive and it’s more expensive if you live in the grounds

so you being the wise human,

you went to get an apartment near the campus

it was great and all since roommate!jaemin was paying for his stuff

you were both living respectively until he had to leave

the dumbass didnt even bother to tell you

one morning you just woke up and found his note

‘hey bitch! figured you were too much of a rock to wake up but i moved out! the family wants me to go back home and tend the restaurant’

the whole day yesterday, you were working

bc,,, yknow

broke college life

and you just walked in half asleep towards your room and fell asleep

so you didnt really see or notice

but were you freaking out bc your roommate suddenly moved out?

ofc you were freaking out

not only was your roommate gone,

how were you going to find a new one?!

jaemin expected your phone call that afternoon and he endured through all your screaming

‘babe, i’m just going to be gone for a year-or two’

‘oR tWO?!’

‘hun, my dad’s injured and his back can only let him do so much. ma’s working too much and i dont have any siblings to help. i figured i could just hold off college until my parents are ready’

ugh, jaemin is such a family boy

‘but jaems! you couldnt have at least told me that yOu wERe mOvING OuT?! and! rent is due soon! i can’t pay for that myself!’

jaemin couldve easily told you to warn yoy

but he didn’t want to tell you bc he couldnt handle you sad and didnt want to upset you

however, now jaemin really understands how shitty that move was

‘tell you what. i’ll pay for this month and make a few phone calls and i’ll get you set up with a new roommate, deal?’

knowing how much of a social butterfly he was, you agreed

ofc you trusted jaemin but part of you feared that he might pair you up with a freak

but he’s not that mean, is he?

you can definitely see renjun doing that but not jaemin

so there you are,,

sitting on your couch alone

without jaemin, your apartment felt really empty

its been a few days since he moved and you were miserable

jaemin hasn’t even texted you about that potential roommate

just as you were about to call him,,

your doorbell rang

you froze and you looked at the time

it was nearing 11 at night and you don’t remember ordering delivery

see,,

if jaemin was here,

he would answer it for you since you would be too scared to do it

but you mustered up your courage and peeped through the peep hole

the man was dressed in all black with a black mask and a black cap with his hood over it with a black hoodie and black pants

ngl, you were terrified and trembling

he rang it again and you jumped

typing out a quick text to jaemin saying ‘hey bub, if i don’t text you in an hour, that means ive been kidnapped so call the police’

you grabbed a pan from the cupboard and gulped before you opened the door

thinking he would just walk forward and grab you, you closed your eyes and raised your pan over your head and swung

a shriek from in front of you made your eyes snap open and found the guy on the floor with a fetal position

you both just froze for like a phat minute

snapping back to reality, you held the pan in front of you

‘if youre going to kidnap me, i got a pan and im not afraid to hit you with it!’

you tried to sound intimidating but your voice was shaking so much

the guy stood up and he took off his hat and the mask to reveal a blonde haired kid

okay, so you were sHOokETh

damn! this boy is fine!

he gave you a shaky smile and held out his hand

‘hi! i’m lee jeno! you must be y/n? jaemin told me you had an opening for a roommate?’

now you noticed the two duffle bags at the side

the embaressment and the shame settled in slowly and you found yourself burning up

nodding, you motioned him to come in

jeno awkwardly walked in and was amazed at how big the layout was with the low rent

‘yea, its kinda hard to believe that we only pay that much. at first i thought there was a ghost in here and that’s why its so cheap’

you tried to make small conversation but laughed weirdly at jeno’s slightly terrified face

‘no! there really is not ghost here! ive lived here for a year and there hasnt been anything so please dont understand! please be my roommate!’

you begged and jeno thought you were weird

but jaemin was right, you were weirdly adorable in a way

so that’s how you and jeno became apartment buddies!

now onto the good stuff!

so, jeno is a vv clean guy

like he’s the type to just pick up a wrapper in the street and throw it in the garbage

so naturally, he likes to keep the apartment as tidy and neat as possible

but you being a mess you are,

you usually leave a lot of things everywhere

lets just say you have a short memory

‘oh? how did that get there?’

eventually, jeno gets sick of it and he confronts you with it

ofc you understand and you actually try to be better

since jeno is literally the most perfect roommate

maybe even better than jaemin

(but don’t tell him that)

jeno is the type to re-stock the pantry with snacks and the fridge with ice cream

since youre both college students, ramen is practically always available in the house 24/7

he also makes the coffee every morning since he works early and wakes up first

even though he doesn’t like the drink and prefers milk, he still notices how you survive off of coffee

babie likes to pick you up some iced americano while he gets a frappe

you on the other hand,,

you’re very surprised

when you got to bed after showing jeno around,

you messaged jaemin

ofc he was worried af and was blowing up your phone

‘WHAT?!’

‘bitch answer the damn phone!’

‘whatthe fuck is happening?!’

‘i need to know if you’re still alive!’

‘oh fuck i shouldnt have moved out’

smiling softly at how worried he was, you responded to him

‘you hoe, it hasnt been an hour yet so chillax. i’m alive, unfortunately, and i just met my new roommate. again, thanks for the heads-up. youre so bad at those. i literally thought he was a burgular or a kidnapper. but he seems chill and emo. just my type.’

but jeno is F A R from C H I L L

oh my goodness,,

hes a crackhead

theres this sound he makes when he’s confused and you couldnt figure out if its cute or weird or if he’s doing this on purpose or thats just how he is

you and him basically communicate with memes

sometimes, at the weird hours at night, he sends you a dumbass meme

you cant help but snort 

also, you promised to take jaemin out to dinner to repay him for the great roommate

‘hes literally one of the best people youll ever meet. it just so happen he needed a place to sleep. now you owe me’

hes a science major while you were a computer major

he basically brings home weird stuff to analyze and it just hella stinks

but hes considerate enough to actually put it outside

whenever he’s focused, he talks to himself or the thing he’s analyzing

‘okay mr. fishy. your scales are really big and its bigger than average’

its so cute

oof also!

jeno doesnt have a job yet he always makes rent on time with extra money to spare

he even sometimes buys you stuff saying, ‘they reminded me of you’

for your birthday, he bought you a pearl necklace that mustve costed thousands

at first, you thought he was a chaebol or smth

which you wouldve been vv jealous of bc youre a struggling college student who works at the coffee shop

but, you were answered when you caught him walking in half-dazed and half-asleep with cuts all over his face

it was like 2 in the morning and you were pulling an all-nighter for some project and wanted to get a glass of water

but here he is, hood up, lip busted, black eye, cheek cut

you shrieked and ushered him to sit on the dining chair

thinking he got mugged or something, you start drilling him questions

‘hun, if you were beat up, we need to call the police! this is illegal!’

but jeno chuckles and brushes the stray hairs out of your face as you tend to his lip

‘pls dont. if you do, ill be broke and i wont have money to pay rent then i cant be your roommate anymore’

cue confused y/n

‘wUT?’

‘if i dont make money, youll kick me out and youll have to find another roommate. i dont want you to go through that hassle again’

ofc you were flattered that even during this situation, hes still thinking about you

‘how is this making money?!’

‘i cant believe youre oblivious to so many things. i thought for sure youve caught on.’

more confusion

‘eXCUse mE, lEE JEno? since when have you started coming home with all these things in your face?’

you were worried that this wasnt the first time this happened

but if you think hard about it, thats why he always wears his mouth masks and he always has his blonde fringe down and sometimes wears sunglasses even though its cloudy outside

‘ohmygod lee jeno are you in a gang?!’

jeno was shocked that you came to that conclusion but laughed at how adorable you were rn

with your wide eyes and mouth open

‘nah, bro. i box. its the only way i can make easy money.’

‘but,,, why did you hide this from me? if you needed money i couldve helped you’

he looked at you skeptically

‘sis, you could barely afford that muffin the other day’

lee jeno now looked different from the jeno you met the first day

What you thought to be an innocent little squish was a fighter at night

‘yah, can-um-you need to take this off’

you mumbled while tugging on his sweatshirt

he nodded and slipped it off

he explained why he came late when he first moved

‘i had a late night match and yknow,, school and all, i barely had enough time to come'

as you dab the wound, you try to make small talk to distract yourself

 ‘so,, youve been boxing this whole time?’

you asked, trying not to get distracted to the way his tight shirt clung to him, showing his defined body

there were bruises up and down his arms and his knuckles were busted

‘yea. i have been since senior high. gotta make money, yknow?’

‘but jen, you can work in coffee shops or at local bookstores. its not worth seeing you busted up like this’

your lips trembled at the thought of him being beaten up too hard to the point he gets into a coma

jenos eyes widened at your wobbling lips and he softly cupped your face

‘hey, im okay and ill be fine. you dont have to worry about me. i usually win, anyways’

his confidence made you chuckle

‘i trust you, lee jeno. just make sure to make it home to me every night.’

‘i know you do and i will. always.”

ever since then,

youve become his little caretaker

youve informed jaemin of what hes been doing and he knew but didnt want you to judge him immediately

smh, jaemin really sucks at informing people

but jeno tries to help you keep up

he even sends you texts that hes fighting that night and your little ‘fighting!’ always makes him smile

his manager and friend, chenle, noticed that hes starting to smile more

chenle likes boxing and wants to be a part of it but doesnt want to be hurt

so,, what better to be the manager of his friend

‘yah, hyung. what’s got you giggly today?’

jeno pointed to the screen and giggled at the little good luck gif you sent

his eyes turned to crescents and chenle smirked

‘wah, you like her, don’t you?’

at the mention of ‘like’, his smile dropped and he shook his head

‘no. of course not. shes just a friend.’

chenle being chenle,,

he continues to prod

‘okay. so every night, you make it your priority to make sure you’re home by 2 in the morning for your friend’

smh, chenle youre so annoying

but hes so right

ever since you caught him,

hes been making sure he gets home at the same time 

he sends you a text that hes on his way and you set your ringtone at a very high volume so you wake up and take care of him

during fights, he makes it his sole mission to make out of this alive and a winner for you

but that never crossed his mind as his feelings for you

he just thought of it as making you not worry for him

but then, he starts to think about your stupid little habits

the way you make this face whenever you dont understand

or when you still leave little post-it notes everywhere with ideas you come up with

he noticed it all and he loves them

‘hOLy ShIT!’

that night was when he realized his feelings for you and he was so dedicated on finishing it that he quickly won and he dashed home with his money

bursting through the door, you looked at him with wide and startled eyes

‘what’s wrong?’

you came running but he scooped you up to a hug

ok you were confused but relieved that he was home and alright

jeno looked at your face and wanted to confess but chickened out at the sight of you

you were so good to him and honestly, he doesnt deserve you

(his thoughts, not mine)

‘i-i’

he stuttered and you motioned him to continue

‘i won!’

he shouted and you congratulated him, even though he literally won all the time

guiding him to the chair, you began to dab his cuts

(dab that bitch)

‘im starting to think that your opponents either really suck or youre like the god of boxing’

he didnt know how to take that but blushed red at the mention of him being a ‘god of boxing’

‘nah, im just good’

you eyed him and smiled

he continued to watch you heal him and inspected your face

heavy eyebags and sunken cheeks, it mustve been a long night

he felt a pang in his chest thinking that you push your stuff away just to help him

‘you dont have to keep doing this for me, yknow’

you halt and look at him seriously

‘i know i dont. but i cant sleep at night thinking youre in pain and alone when i can be there for you’

even though he just realized it, jeno was pretty sure he fell in love with you a long time ago

but if it was possible, he fell in love with you even more

‘thank you’

his soft voice filled the silence and you vowed that you will always be there for him whenever he needs help

a few days later, jeno hasnt been to a fight

sure you were worried at what was going on in his head but partly relieved that you dont have to see him so battered anymore

but this was so un-jeno

just as you were about to talk to him about it, he announces he got a job at the bookstore down the street

‘huh? i thought you didnt want to work’

you question while he looked sheepish

‘i realized that i was starting to become a burden since you take care of me every time. so i thought i should quit and get a regular job. besides, it doesnt hurt as much’

he laughed but you didnt react

‘lee jeno, you gave up boxing and the money,,, for me?’

he nervously looked up at you and you noticed the redness of his cheeks

‘i-well-if you put it that way’

‘listen to me, im flattered and i truly love that you dont want to get beaten up anymore. but i dont want you to quit something you like because of me'

‘but you always take care of me and push your priorities away to clean me up. i dont do anything in return and i dont think its fair!’

he argued and a soft smile crept up your face

‘yah, lee jeno'

your voice became a whisper

‘it doesnt matter to me if you dont do anything in return bc i dont see this as a favor. you are mine to take care of and i will do anything for you, you understand that?’

he looked at you in shock after hearing your response

he also turned red at the mention of him being yours

‘so-but-i dont think-'

he stutters but you place your hands on his arms making him stop

‘all i ask is you to come back home, to come back to me'

by now, yall were blushing

even though it might not sound like it,

but yall just indirectly confessed to each other

yall stared at the ground and jeno looks up, biting his lip

‘hey, y/n, can i make it up to you with some coffee?’

your head darted up and looked at him with wide eyes

‘like-like a date?’

it came out suddenly and you stepped back in surprise, cursing yourself

but jeno chuckled, eyes scrunching cutely

‘it'll be one of many'

lmao i didnt really like this but i made it at 2 in the morning and i kinda like boxer!jeno

[rambling-at-midnight]

Meddling

Anonymous Request: #8 and #80 for Peter Parker, please?

#8: “You’ve got thirty seconds to explain to me what you’re doing here.”

#80: “Why is that your password?”

It’s a widely known fact at school that Peter Parker is sort of a dork. He doesn’t make the best decisions. He gets caught in the wrong places. He says the wrong things. He says the right things at the wrong time.

It’s a widely known fact in Queens that Spider-man is super cool. He always shows up where he’s needed. He can take out eight men at once without breaking a sweat. He’s got witty retorts ready any second. He’s got crazy powers that make him strong and sticky.

It’s a widely known fact in the Stark tower that Peter Parker is kind of a genius. He can keep up with Tony Stark and is in the workshop with him 90% of the time he’s there. The other 10% of the time Peter spends at the tower is with you.

It is also a widely known fact in the Stark tower that Peter Parker has a crush on Y/N Stark, and that you have a crush on Spider-man.

Tony takes great amusement in the irony of that statement, although sometimes the obtuse way both teenagers skirt around their feelings for each other can be frustrating. Peter is literally the only guy Tony will ever accept for you because he can trust the webslinger would rather die than hurt the feelings of someone he loves.

“Hey, FRIDAY,” Peter greets when he walks into the common area.

“Hello, Peter,” the AI responds.

“Is Y/N here?”

“No,” FRIDAY says. “She does not return from the cabin until Thursday.”

Peter wilts a bit but nods. “Okay.”

See, the reason the ratio of Tony-to-Y/N time is so wonky is because of how much time you spend in the super-secret cabin. Tony insists on it for your protection or something like that.

“I’m still here,” Tony points out, pouring himself a coffee, and smirks when Peter jumps.

“I didn’t know you were there!” the teenager gasps, putting a hand to his heart like he’s in danger of a heart attack.

Tony snorts. “Is your Peter-tingle still not working?”

Taken aback, Peter stares at his mentor for a second before shaking his head. “I have got to stop Aunt May from talking about me to you. And no, I’ve told you this a thousand times; it doesn’t work when I’m around people that aren’t threats to me!”

“Whatever you say, buddy,” Tony shrugs, yawning. “Now, as I’m sure my presence is more than enough a substitute for the presence of my daughter, let’s get to work, why don’t we?”

Peter blushes. “Okay.”

“Speaking of my daughter,” Tony adds, “when are you going to ask her out?”

Peter falls flat on his face.

~~~~

You seriously love having private jets at your disposal; trips are so much more comfortable and quick. Especially private jets that are eco-friendly, because it means you can flaunt your wealth without worrying about people on the internet dragging you.

Nah, you’re just kidding. You don’t flaunt your wealth that much.

Just a little.

“I’m home!” you call when you walk into the quiet common floor of the Avengers tower. All the lights are off. You frown. “Dad?”

Nothing. He must be on a business call. They seem to pop up unexpectedly all the time and you don’t begrudge him for them.

Besides, it’s late. You’ll go to sleep and greet your father in the morning. And hopefully Peter.

You roll your eyes at yourself and check your phone in vain for new messages, but nothing comes through. Not your dad checking to see if the flight landed on time, not Peter sending you a meme, not even Natasha texting you mission details in the rare occurrence you’re allowed to accompany the team.

Nothing. Complete radio silence.

Being a Stark is more isolating than one would think.

You sigh and rub your eyes, excited to go to sleep in your comfortable bed in your soundproofed room.

“FRIDAY?” you try.

“Your father is otherwise engaged, Y/N,” the AI responds. “He sends his regrets. If it is any consolation, I am pleased to see you again. So to speak.”

You smile up at the ceiling. “Thanks, FRI.”

FRIDAY lights up the walk from the common area to your room. You’ve seen enough horror movies to have a faint sense of how creepy it is to only be able to see a few feet in front of you at a time, but you trust the AI. It’s not like anything’s going to happen to you. Besides, even if there is something or someone there, you’ve been trained in enough forms of combat by literally every Avenger so you’re pretty confident you can handle yourself.

You open your door, still contemplating your phone’s screen as if staring at it will make people send you texts, but something crashes in your bathroom and you jump. The door swings shut behind you as you rush to the bathroom.

A trussed-up Spider-man struggles to his feet from where he is in your shower.

Wait. Spider-man in my shower?

You raise a single eyebrow, relaxing and crossing your arms while leaning against the doorframe. “You’ve got thirty seconds to explain to me what you’re doing here.”

“Did you let the door shut?” Spider-man squeals.

You frown, confused. “Uhh...” A quick glance over your shoulder confirms that the door is, in fact, closed. “Yeah.”

The superhero groans. “No!”

“Um, you still haven’t explained a thing, and you’re down twenty seconds,” you prompt, tapping your wrist that doesn’t even bear a watch.

“Long story short, your dad locked me in here,” Spidey groans. “And now that you’ve let the door shut, you’re locked in here with me too.”

You bite your lip. “Uh... why would Dad lock you in my room, Peter?”

“I have no idea,” Spider-man replies, then freezes. “Wait! Who’s Peter? I—I’m not Peter, I don’t even know a Peter!”

You quirk an eyebrow. “Uh-huh.” Spinning on your heel, you tug on your room’s door handle. True to his word, the door doesn’t budge.

“Seriously!” Spidey, hot on your heels, insists. “I really—I’ve never met you before in my life! I mean, I’ve seen you, because you’re famous because you’re Y/N Stark, but you’ve never met me! Or seen me! Or—”

“Peter.” You sigh and put your hands on your hips. “Honestly. Do you remember when my father announced to the world that he was Iron Man?”

“That’s a pivotal moment in history,” Spidey mutters, “so I’m sure that everyone remembers that.”

“Yeah. And did you know that he walked into that press conference with a fully detailed cover story as well as paid actors as witnesses to back up his story?”

“Uh...” Spider-man shifts his weight on his feet back and forth.

“And instead of simply reading off the cards like he was supposed to, he proceeded to announce to the entire world his second identity. So no, my father is not very good at lying or keeping secrets. And, Peter, do you remember that one time I walked in on you and Dad working on one of your suits?”

Spider-man crosses his arms over his chest. His mask reveals nothing of what he’s thinking.

“I made a joke about how cool it would be to meet Spider-man,” you continue, “and you proceeded to stammer on for five minutes about how that would be crazy for me because I’ve totally never met him before. So no. You and my dad are both terrible at keeping secrets and lying.”

You reach for the mask, hesitating for a moment to see if he’ll pull away. When he simply huffs, you tug the mask off, revealing Peter Parker’s flushed cheeks and bouncy curls. You can’t help the butterflies that flutter in your stomach. “You’ve known for months?”

“Months and months.” You grin crookedly at the flustered boy. “But seriously. Why are you locked in my room, Peter?”

“Okay,” the boy says quickly. “I came by today because I knew you were coming back and I thought it would be cool to say hi to you and show you this cool design we’re working on for your suit. We got repulsor rays just like Tony on the palms of your hands as well as the flight stabilizers, but it was tricky because your suit isn’t metal. But we got it eventually! And—”

“Peter,” you interrupt. God knows the boy could speak for hours by constantly going off on tangents.

“Right, right,” he says, biting his lip. He has no idea how attractive you find that action. “So I was here. And Tony thinks, I don’t know, that it would be funny to test the strength of the web formula we’ve been working on. And it’s not going to dissolve for two more hours,” he groans. That explains the weird white substance keeping his hands together. “I could get it apart, but that might rip my suit.”

“Yeah, I was wondering why you were wearing the old suit,” you remark.

“We were trying to blend the Iron Spider suit and my old suit together,” Peter explains. “So I was modeling this suit. But if I rip it now, it could destroy this suit completely, and what if there’s an emergency?”

You glance around your room. There’s a pair of scissors on your desk and, despite knowing it’s a long shot, you try to cut the web fluid holding his hands together. The only thing that happens is the scissors get stuck. Same with the pocketknife you try to use.

When you approach Peter with a stapler, he jerks away. “No! It’s pretty much unbreakable. You’re just going to get more stuff stuck in it!”

You can’t help the giggle that bursts from your lips when you see Spider-man, Queens’ very own superhero, with red cheeks and floppy curls, thwarted by his own weapon with a pair of scissors and a knife sticking out of his shapeless white cuffs.

“Great, now she’s laughing at me,” Peter groans. “Wait, can you do something for me?”

“Sure,” you say, still snickering a bit.

“Tony put my phone on the bed.” He gestures in that direction. “I’ve been hearing it go off. I don’t know if it’s Tony, or Ned, or May, or anyone else. Could you bring it to me?”

You retrieve the phone and hold it out to him. Peter holds up his webbed hands in vain, but it’s no use. No fingers are available to punch in the password.

“Just tell me it,” you sigh when he tries in vain to punch in the password with his nose.

“No!” Peter blushes furiously.

“Dude, May’s gonna be worried about you. Just tell me.” You roll your eyes. “Not that I couldn’t hack in anyway, but it would require FRIDAY and a lot more time and effort than you just telling me your password.”

“FRIDAY?” Peter asks hopefully, staring at the ceiling. Just as you’d suspected; your father either disabled the AI for your room or commanded it to not respond to their of your pleas for escape.

“Seriously,” you groan. “You do realize you can change the password right away, right?”

“It’s embarrassing,” Peter groans, which is absolutely the worst thing to say. You perk up immediately.

“What is it?”

“I’m not telling.” Peter crosses his arms and glares at the wall.

“Is it your old crush’s name? Uh... Michelle or something?”

“I never liked MJ,” Peter snaps. “She’s just my friend.”

You snort. “Uh-huh.” Quick as a flash, you snatch the phone up from where it was sitting on the bed next to his thigh. “Tell me. Tell me. Tell me.”

Peter closes his eyes and shakes his head. “I will not.”

“What’s the worst it could be?” you ask. “I promise I won’t tell Dad.”

“That’s a lie.”

“You got me there. If it’s something about My Little Pony or Dora the Explorer I’d have to tell him right away. You know me too well.”

“It’s not My Little Pony or Dora the Explorer!” Peter exclaims.

“Well, unless you tell me what it really is,” you tease, “I’m going to have to assume it’s one of those two categories. Want me to guess My Little Pony names until your phone locks you out forever?”

Peter groans and flops onto the bed. “I’m never going to live this down.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you say primly. “I’d never dream of teasing you, Pete.”

Peter mumbles something.

“What?”

“IsaidmypasswordisY/NParkernospaces” he rushes out.

“What?”

“I said,” Peter gets out through gritted teeth, “my password is Y/NParker, no spaces.”

There’s a long pause of silence and Peter chances opening his eyes to look at your reaction. You’re staring at him evenly, the phone in your lap forgotten. “Why is that your password?”

“Don’t make me say it,” Peter pleads weakly. “I’m never going to be able to live this down anyway.”

“Peter. Why is that your password?”

“Because I like you!” he bursts out, his tone a lot louder than he’d intended it to be. “Duh, Y/N. Like you said, I’m sorta bad at hiding stuff. Even your dad knows. It’s why he locked me in here.”

“What?” You unlock the phone quickly and check the texts. There’s two from May asking why Peter’s not home yet, one from Ned about a homework assignment, and three from Tony.

Tony Stark: You’re going to read this either when those webs dissolve or when Y/N unlocks your phone, which means she’s going to discover your password and your crush on her

Tony Stark: If so, hi, Y/N! Love you! Sorry I couldn’t be there to greet you but I had to play matchmaker for some oblivious teens

Tony Stark: Go get ‘em, tiger ;). You’re not leaving the room until you do. But no funny business!

“This is so embarrassing,” you and Peter groan at the same time. You exchange startled glances.

“What do you have to be embarrassed about?” Peter asks. You show him the screen of his phone.

“My stupid meddling father,” you glower, quite sure that he’s listening to your conversation now.

“I’m sorry,” Peter sighs.

“What are you sorry for?” You frown.

“For telling you how I felt. I know your dad thinks you like me back, but it’s totally fine if you don’t. We can stay friends. Or if you don’t even want to be friends, I guess that’s all right. It’d be awkward because I come to the tower so much to work with your dad but I’m sure we can work something out. Besides, you visit the cabin so much—oomph.”

He grunts with surprise when you lean forward and press your lips against his. For a moment you think he’s going to try to keep talking even while kissing, but then he sighs against your lips and his webbed hands go to your stomach. He groans with frustration. “This sucks,” he groans, breaking the kiss. “I can’t touch you at all. I can’t even feel you through the webs. And—oh my God, I could have stabbed you!” He leaps to his feet, looking at his webbed hands and the weapons sticking out of the mess with horror.

You double over with laughter.

“It’s not funny, Y/N!” Peter whines. “You could have been seriously hurt! Your dad woulda killed me! Do you have any idea—”

You stand and, avoiding the weapons, press your lips against his again. It seems to be an effective way to stop the rambling and keep his mind on one track. More or less.

“I bet the door’s unlocked now,” Peter mumbles against your mouth, breaking the kiss again, and you growl with frustration.

“Peter, shut up and kiss me.”

Forever Taglist:

@lemirabitur @annymcervantes @queenmissfit @quiet-because-it-is-a-secret @iksey

Let me know if you’d like to be added to a taglist!

[choccos-aaart]

Antag interview!

>>BASE<<

Feat. the five major antagonists of the story of April and friends: Mr Skatra, Dr Sarlife Aufel, Wyra, Eyn, and Farqua

*NOTE: Definitely got spoilers for the story I’m writing, if you’re interested :P*

**NOTE: I better’ve not written anything wrong here...**

Greetings, and welcome to the "Villians Interview Meme". Whether you like it or not, you've been brought here to answer some questions about yourself. This is a recording, pausing and starting controlled by your author, so you cannot attack me.  If you begin to fight with one another, you WILL be sedated/strait-jacketed. Alright now, let's start.

Would you show the viewers a shred of kindness by allowing us to know your name(s)?

Skatra: Oh…? I’m first? Alright, then… Hello, my name is Abarran. ...Known by most as Mr Skatra.

Doc: Evening! I’m Sarlife. Others call me Doc. And, I am not sharing my surname. Who’s next?

Wyra: It’s me. Hi, hello, my name’s Wyra. I’m Sarlife’s action partner. I keep a look out for her, too.

Eyn: I’m Eyn, and I’m Abarran’s kid.

Farqua: Suppose they left the best for last, huh! Hi! The name’s Farqua Pells!

Are you male or female?

Skatra: I’m male.

Doc: I don’t conform. Next,

Wyra: I am female!

Eyn: Usually people get me all wrong, but I’m a girl. Don’t blame ‘em though…

Farqua: And I’m a man, haha!

 How old are you in human years?

Skatra: Forty-nine. Almost fifty... *sigh*

Doc: I’ve existed for 77 years, but my AI depicts me as, I dunno, somewhere in my 30s? 40s? Either way, I’m a working adult.

Farqua: So ya let us know your age but y’ain’t givin’ off your last name? For real?

Doc: It’s embarrassing. Wyra, it’s your turn.

Wyra: My AI depicts me as about the same as Doc! But I could be younger. I was built in year X701 which was about 65 years ago.

Eyn: I’m 16. Well, at least I’m programmed to be 16. I was actually built six years ago. What about you, Farqua? Gonna bet you’re like programmed to be 10, haha.

Farqua: Shut up. Uhh, I’m in my 30s... In my programmin’, of course. Almost reachin’ my 50 years milestone in real time, though!

 What exactly are you?

Skatra: Excuse me… what? If you’re asking whether I’m human or not, I’m human. 

Doc; Yeah, a pathetic one.

Skatra: Would you shut up?! …By the way, the rest of them are androids.

Doc: You really had to answer for us, didn’t you?

Skatra: It saves time.

 Do you have any powers?

Skatra: No… Doctor?

Doc: Well, a lot of medical tools can be transformed out of my arm. And I’ve built myself a little machine that can automatically mix different medicines and whatnot.

Wyra: Well, I’ve learned to use my power source abilities for things that aren’t just powering things. Something I can do is produce power from both my star-panels and my natural gas source, which I think is cool. 

Eyn: Alright. Uh… My arm’s literally a toolbox. No, literally, it can like, shoot a bunch of tools out of it. Well, those tools really are just these cool things that unfold from these tiny boxes. Weird science stuff I don’t wanna explain. Also, my arm used to be for weapons n’ stuff. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention I was originally built to commit some revenge robbery or something, so I’m packed with a whole bunch of stealth n’ robbery stuff like, y’know. Too lazy to list it all down, though…

Farqua: Damnit Eyn, now you’re makin’ me feel pathetic!

Eyn: Well, boo-hoo.

Farqua: So, uhh… ‘s just my arm can transform into just a whole buncha garden n’ landscapin’ tools. That’s it, really.

Skatra: If it makes you happy, that’s every slasher film writer’s dream.

Farqua: Well, ain’t that nice!

 Who is your archrival, and what do you hate about them? Do they have powers?

Skatra: It’s you, Doctor, Wyra, and all your affiliates!

Wyra: Yeah, whatever.

Doc: Ah yes, I greatly apologise for ruining your life to KEEP THE PEOPLE I CARE ABOUT SAFE!

Farqua: Well Doc, y’ain’t gonna deny that almost everyone hates your way of doin’ it, are ya? And April fights for ‘em, too. 

Doc: YOU DON’T NEED TO BE INVOLVED, FARQUA!

Farqua: Shiieeeet… Calm ya farm. ...Wait, that doesn’t work in my accent.

Skatra: And also, that blasted April! I hate that child! She has and is still playing a big part of tearing my life to pieces, as if it wasn’t unbearable enough!

Farqua: Goddamn! Now everyone’s bein’ real overdramatic!

Eyn: So, uh, April’s pretty much my rival, too. And we always keep running into each other. It’s almost like some stupid rival logic you see in comics and TV and stuff.

Farqua: Ha! Imagine havin’ that happen to ya? Haha!

Eyn: … And who’s your rival, Farqua? Aren’t you just the henchman-turned-hostage?

Farqua: Shut up.

Eyn: Thought so.

Farqua: But as hostage I kept bickerin’ with Matro. Does that count?

Eyn: That’s fair. …Wait. I forgot to mention, April doesn’t really have powers. When we thought we were gonna be friends when we met the first time, I sorta turned her old stick into a weapon. Yeah. Things really backfired on me.

 Do you rule over any sort of land, country, county?

Skatra: I could never rule something like that…

Doc: Oh no; I’ve got no knowledge or interest in being a ruler. I’m just a doctor.

Wyra: I can’t either, since I once accidentally caused a power outage in my old city!

Doc: And though the answer’s pretty obvious already, what about you, Eyn? Do you rule a population of some sort?

Eyn: Nah. It doesn’t even seem cool.

Farqua: Me neither. Huh! Weird that none of us are that typa antagonist?

Skatra: Now that you say it… I agree.

 Why are you considered "the bad guy"?

Skatra: Well… I’ll admit, my goal is to take probably the most important thing that the building’s got, and yes, many robots were taken advantage of in the process.

Doc: And people were hurt. And you’ve committed murder before – oho, blood’s on your hands.

Skatra: DOCTOR! I thought our therapy session was meant to be confidential!

Doc: Oops, my bad.

Skatra: And it looks like we’ve got a reason why Doctor’s a part of this interview. Any more you want to say about yourself?

Doc: Ah… Uh… I forced a lot of innocents into getting involved and even fight in this mess of a situation. And yes, without their consent. Or their families’ consent. And by doing that, their lives were all at stake. Yeah, I regret it. Fly me to skuelk. 

Wyra: I’m Doc’s action partner and out of the two of us, I think I’ve actively hurt April the most. And April’s still a little kid! That’s definitely given me a bad look!

Eyn: Eh, I just help Dad with stuff. And it really looks like I don’t care much about hurting people. That’s it, really. And I guess I also run into April the most, and a lot of the story’s from her perspective, so I guess I’m really put under a bad light.

Farqua: Same story! I’m one of Skatra’s guys! Except I’M THE ONLY ONE THAT GOT CAPTURED BY APRIL N’ FRIENDS AND IT’S SO FUCKIN’ EMBARRASSIN’.

 Do you consider yourself purely evil?

Skatra: No! Who would?!

Wyra: Not me! I’ve just been called sadistic!

Doc: Let’s be completely real. Nobody really considers themselves evil. All of us just want to do what we feel like is right.

Eyn: Yeah, I don’t think I’m doing anything evil. I guess it’s sometimes I’m not knowing the difference between not giving a shit what everyone thinks about me versus doing what everyone agrees is morally wrong.

Farqua: Whoa! Ya got a lot of wisdom for a kid!

Skatra: And where do you think she got that from, hm?

Farqua: Stop lyin’ to yourself, she ain’t your biological daughter.

Skatra: Shut up.

 What do you think of the others in the quiz room?

Skatra: Well first off, Eyn’s my daughter, the only family member I’m happy talking to, and I love her a lot. Doctor’s a bit… I don’t know. From my experience, they’ve been a very caring and genuine person at first.  Wyra’s a bit of an oddball. I still think she’s a bit scary to approach. Those two are definitely people  you wouldn’t want as an enemy, but then again, here I am. And that leaves Farqua, who’s probably just as competent as he is annoying. What about you, Doctor?

Farqua: WHA-

Doc: Ehrm, thanks for acknowledging that about me. Anyways, as much as I hate what you’re doing, Abarran, and mind me, I’m being as honest as I can, you’re just someone who needs help. It honestly hurts to watch you and what you’re doing. Wyra is a close friend of mine! We’re completely different, but it’s as if she completely understands me. And Farqua, you’re… You’re alright, I guess. Also, I’ve been hoping for you to just stop trying to be my “rival” ever since you read that aphorism, “an apple a day keeps the doctor away.” And Eyn, I can tell you’re hiding behind a façade; just reveal that you dress and act the way you do because you’re a fan of the Axel Duiti series. To me, you’re as easy to read as a children’s book.

Eyn:  Hey! I mean… Never mind. Uh… My dad’s like the only guy that’s got my back. He’s cool. Dr Sarlife’s like, I dunno, a bit scary to talk to. Also, what’s up with the bunny ears?

Doc: That’s none of your… Alright, to tell you the truth, I worked at a children’s hospital. Let’s not get off topic, now. What are your thoughts on Wyra and Farqua?

Eyn: Oh. Uh… Wyra’s so hyper, it’s exhausting. But, I think we can get along? I dunno… I hope we do. And Farqua’s pretty cool. We get along pretty well. But cut off the “howdy” unless you’re gonna say that to everyone. That’s all.

Wyra: From what I know so far, I know I get along with Sarlife the best! Skatra’s, I dunno. All I know about him is through what Sarlife told me, and I think he’s a bit of a prick that could do with some fixing up. Maybe. I think Eyn’s cool! I think I’ve seen the Axel Duiti series on telly before, and I think that’s a good way to start talking! And now, Farqua. Um… Definitely a bit weird. But I find that endearing!

Farqua: That’s… That’s it? ‘Right, guess it’s my turn, then! First off, Doc, Wyra n’ Skatra, you’re all assholes for doin’ all the stuff you’re doin’ and for all the stuff ya said ‘bout me. And Eyn, you can still look like a badass and be open ‘bout all your apparently “less cool” self. Look at me? I look all cute n’ cuddly n’ sweet, but I’m pretty open ‘bout my reckless n’ aggressive nature n’ stuff, ya get?

Eyn: Wow… Didn’t expect a pep-talk but okay, I’ll take that.

Farqua: No prob, kiddo!

 On a rate of one to ten, how powerful do you think the villain next to you is?

Skatra: Oh God, I hate rating like this. Uh… Doctor’s probably a 7.

Doc: …That’s fair; I’ll take it. I was going to say 7 for you. Wyra’s close to an 8.

Wyra: No offence Sarlife, but I reckon you’re a 6, for me. 

Doc: None taken.

Wyra: Eyn’s a 9 for me. I’ve seen her with April and it’s not pretty.

Eyn: Wyra’s probably a, I dunno, 7…? Farqua’s 1.

Farqua: WHAT?!

Eyn: But with your limbs, you’re, I dunno, 8. You’re pretty strong and got a bunch of tools and stuff.

Farqua: Well, Eyn, I’m givin’ you an 8! Remember, this’s all ‘bout perspective. 

 Now, how powerful do you consider yourself to be?

Skatra: 4… 5…? I can’t get over it.

Doc: 6 or a 7. I don’t think I can give myself anything else after that last question.

Wyra: Tough. Probably 7? Or 8.

Eyn: 8.

Farqua: God, some of y’all don’t think that high of yourselves, huh! I’m givin’ myself a 9!

  Do you have an evil laugh?

Skatra: No, that’s stupid.

Doc: Can we all agree on this and move on?

Eyn: Yeah.

Wyra: Done and done!

Farqua: You guys are borin’ as hell y’know. I sorta do have one actually! But I guess tha’s ‘cause Matro keeps tellin’ me I’m just mean-spirited. And sadistic too, but it ain’t like that!

 Do ya fear death?

Skatra: Er… I’ll pass on this one…

Doc: Alright. No, I don’t, honestly.

Wyra: I agree! I don’t really care. I’ve kind of experienced it, before. 

Eyn: Well, I do. I’ve still got things I wanna get outta the way and I don’t wanna miss ‘em.

Farqua: Do I fear death? Well, I guess I do! I’ve seen it countless times ‘cause I’ve been to every burial held at the buildin’ and I see everybody all heartbroken n’ stuff. Makes me worry, y’know, ‘bout all the people who care ‘bout me n’ all.

Docc: Well, to be fair, we do all have the choice to live for as long as we want, as long as we’re not seriously damaged to the point beyond repair. Well, except for Abarran, here. He’s human and we’re all bound to outlive him.

Skatra: That’s not very nice.

 What's your goal, exactly? Or are you just evil for the heck of it?

Skatra: It’s quite basic, really. So, to put it simply, nearly fifty years of hard work’s gone down the drain. And to make up for all of it, I felt the need to do something big. So, my goal is to take the proclo machine and reveal it to the world as something of mine. Yes, I know I’ll be living a lie, but I just want to make an impact of some sort that’ll change the world, whether it be for the better or for the worse, and once the whole world hates me, I’ll just end it all there.

Doc: Alright… Well, I just want to keep this building, you know, ALIVE. I care about everyone and everything that has to do with this building, and I’ll do anything if it means this building lives on. And that’s it! I mean it literally! 

Wyra: Everything I know about this situation is through Sarlife, really. She told me everything, and when I say “anything,” I mean it. I care about this building, a lot, too! ...Eyn? What about you? Let me guess: you just want to make your dad proud of you, right?

Eyn: That’s one of them. But also, there was this one guy that commissioned me, he gave me a mission, and I failed it. Big time. Then I got left on the shelf for years, he commissioned another robot n’ stuff, and once that was done, I was sold somewhere to do some more stuff that I didn’t do so well at either, and then I was sold again. I didn’t really feel like I had anything good to do in this world, so that sucked. And then Dad picked me up from the markets and now I’m making sure I don’t fail at anything, anymore.

Farqua: … This is awkward… I ain’t got much of a motive… I just, I dunno, work for the guy- I mean Skatra…

Doc: THAT’S BECAUSE HE MANAGED TO TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR GOAL SYSTEM, YOU ABSOLUTE BUFFOON!!

Farqua: Goddamn! Ya gotta calm down! And I thought I was aggressive!

 Do you have henchmen/a henchman?

Skatra: A lot of robots, yes, I do.

Doc: ROBOTS WHO WERE MY FRIENDS THAT YOU TOOK ADVANTAGE OF, THAT’S WHO!

Wyra: They were my friends, too, you know!

Skatra: You know, you’ll both eventually end up working for me, sooner or later.

Doc: I’ll make sure that doesn’t happen. 

Wyra: We’ve gathered a lot of the non-robotic inhabitants of the building, anyway, to help get rid of you! And Eyn, too!

Skatra: Ooh, I’m soo scared.

Eyn: … Okay so, I work with my dad, so all those robots- I mean Dr Sarlife and Wyra’s friends are sorta my henchmen, too. Wow, that makes me sound really villainous, haha…

Farqua: So! It’s my turn, now, ain’t it? WELL, JOKES ON Y’ALL, I AM A HENCHMAN!

  What do you drive?

Skatra: My little car, with a trailer attached. How do you think I got to the building? 

Doc: I drive a scooter. It’s very easy to get around which is great!

Wyra: I’m not very good at driving. But, I have had a go on the hover bikes which are fun!

Eyn: I sorta know how to drive Dad’s car, but I know the anatomy n’ whatnot better than I can drive.

Farqua: Goddamnit, EYN can drive, too?! Well…! Matro said he’d teach me to drive the train later on.

Doc: What? 

Wyra: You and Matro are all buddy-buddy, now?

Farqua: Sorta!

Doc: Well…. That’s surprising…

Wyra: Since when?

Farqua: Huh. You’re getting’ a little jealous now I’m spedin’ a lot of my time with your ol’ pal, ain’t ya?

 What do you do when you aren't trying to do whatever you're trying to achieve?

Skatra: What do I do… Well, aside from moping in my apartment all day, I like to build machines and do some arthropod photography.

Doc: For me, you’d find me obviously doing my work. During my breaks, I take walks all around the building, and occasionally, I’d draw over my papers. I’m not a very skilled artist, though…

Wyra: I like to watch some telly! And just travel around the building while I’m not doing my work, of course!

Eyn: So, as Dr Sarlife said, you probably already know I’m a huge fan of the Axel Duiti series, so I re-watch the show, re-read the comics, and all that stuff. I also like playing bass guitar and helping Dad with building and stuff. That’s it, really.

Farqua: First off, I’m a gardener and a landscaper, so catch me up on the rooftop gardens doin’ my thing. When I ain’t doin’ all that, you’ll find me in the library reading some books about, I dunno, random stuff.

 Were you ever a double-crosser (pretended to be on the opposite team, then stabbed them in the back)?

Skatra: Well, I—

Doc: THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT YOU DID TO ME!

Skatra: Doctor, there is no need to yell! Good God!

Doc: You can’t deny that it’s true, though. For me, I would never do that.

Wyra: Never done it! If anything, I like being honest.

Eyn: Well, I’ve tried doing that. It didn’t go very well… Farqua, your turn.

Farqua: Oh yeah. Mine’s damn interestin’, alright. ‘Cause if April and friends DIDN’T get to me first, I woulda done exactly that!

Skatra: I’m pretty sure I heard them say they thought you were up to something beforehand, so…

Farqua: Wh… How do you even hear this stuff?

Skatra: Your point of view was connected to my computers, why?

Farqua: …OKAY. I FORGOT. SORRY.

  On a scale of 1 to 10, how often do you lie? *gives them truth serum*

Skatra: Oh God… 8

Doc: 3. Lying isn’t that big a thing for both robots and doctors, and then there’s me.

Wyra: 4. Like I said, I like to be truthful. Just saying.

Eyn: 5. I’m pretty honest.

Farqua: 6-ish.

Skatra: … You’re joking! I lie the most out of all of us?

Farqua: Well, y’gotta face it. You’re the only human here.

 What color is your: hair?

Skatra: Dark green. ...For some reason.

Doc: It’s some sort of brown.

Wyra: A bit reddish-brown. Think of Sarlife’s favourite pants.

Doc: ...

Eyn: I wish I had hair…

Farqua: Ain’t that also why you wear a hat?

Eyn: I guess…

Farqua: Anyways, I ain’t got no hair too, ‘cause my design’s just like that, y’know! Gotta admit, I still pull off a cute look, huh!

 Eyes?

Skatra: Dark, dark brown.

Doc: My irises are generally jet black and my sclerae are white. When I’m under the influence of an energy chip, my sclerae turn a blueish colour.

Farqua: “SCELRAE, SCELRAE,” look, ya don’t gotta go all textbook talk mode on us.

Doc: ...You could’ve at least been a little bit nicer...

Eyn: Uh… My eyes are black. Dad says I’m not allowed to have effect chips yet, so my whites are always white.

Farqua: For most of the story, I’m not on anything so you’d see my eyes are just like Eyn’s. But a lot of the time, when I’m not working, you’d catch the white bits of my eyes turned bright yellow! Forgot which chip it was but I set up a whole stash months ago!

Wyra: Um… I’ve got no irises!

 Skin?

Skatra: Some sort of darkish beige.

Doc: I don’t really have skin, but I’m painted grey.

Wyra: Also painted grey.

Eyn: My paints are a bit weird. A lot of my body’s green, some areas are painted cream, my forearms and below the knees are painted brown, and my face is grey. Sorry if it’s a lot.

Farqua: I’m painted mostly red with some super light yellow in some places. I’ve got some small bits that’re this dark purply brown, too. And my upper arms, whatcha call it, are—

Doc: Your brac-

Farqua: WOULD YA— Doc, don’t do that. …Anyways, my whatchamacallits ain’t really painted at all.

 Whats your uniform/favorite outfit?

Skatra: Since it’s winter, I’ve been wearing my favourite turtleneck at lot, recently. I like to pair it with my long coat.

Doc: My only outfit is my doctors’ uniform. It’d be kind of strange to see me wear anything else.

Wyra: I’ve got my work uniform. That’s it, really.

Eyn: Right now, I’m wearing an outfit based off Axel Duiti. He’s an outlaw in the old Earthian west.

Farqua: I AIN’T WEARIN’ NO CLOTHES, HAHA! And that’s ‘cause my designers made sure I was too good for ‘em.

 Have you ever gone mad?

Skatra: Mad…? As in angry or…

Doc: I think they mean gone totally mental. As in you’ve lost your mind.

Skatra: Oh. Yes, I did. When, I’m not going to mention any names here, an ex-friend of mine put my years-worth of effort down the drain back in… X761, I think? What about you, Doctor?

Doc: Ah, I remember that one time… That one time Eyn nearly got me to fall under your control... And then, after that, you took all the little nurses and doctors that worked with me as prisoners... Hm, and it was a threat, too! All so I wouldn’t publicise your dastardly plan!

Skatra: Good God, you didn’t need to go into that much detail!

Doc: Anywho, what about you, Wyra? Anything similar?

Wyra: I don’t recall, really. Eyn?

Eyn: Nope.

Doc: Really? Even after everything that’s happened to you?

Eyn: Nope. And I hope it doesn’t happen to me. That’d be embarrassing.

Farqua: I ain’t had that happen to me, either! Guess that’s just a side effect of being old, huh!

Wyra: Haha!

Skatra: Excuse me?!

Doc: Farqua, you, Wyra and I were ALL programmed to behave the same age– WHAT MAKES YOU THINK YOU CAN SAY THAT TO ME?!

Farqua: Well, just like I said to Matro, “Stress. It ages ya.”

Doc: It doesn’t. …Alright, it does! But that doesn’t mean you can say what you just said!

Wyra: Wait... I’m stressed...?

 If so, did you enjoy it?

Skatra: No! Of course, not!

Doc: If anyone had half a brain, even they’d know not to enjoy something like that!

Skatra: You don’t even have an organic brain and you, too, know not to enjoy something like that.

Doc: … Your daughter is right here.

Skatra: OH MY GOD, I’m so sorry!

Eyn: It’s okay, Dad.

  Have any family?

Skatra: I do, back at the city. I haven’t spoken with them in almost thirty years. Eyn is the only closest family I’ve got.

Eyn: Yeah, I’ve just got him, too.

Doc: Uh, me? I can’t say. I guess if you count my model’s predecessors and successors. It makes sense.

Farqua: Same story as Doc, I guess.

Wyra: Same’s too!

  Have you ever been in love? If you have, do they love you back?

Skatra: A few times I thought I did, actually. Once in high school, twice in university, and after, I realised love wasn’t anything of my interest. I’m not complaining, though.

Wyra: Definitely! I been in love before!

Skatra: Robots can… Do that...?

Wyra: Um, yeah?

Doc: I haven’t, really. Also, this might be related, but I’ve done so a few times ever since I created the lust chip, and experimented with myself.

Eyn: Lust chip…? The heck?

Farqua: Woo-hoo, Doc, who were they?

Doc: In my first trial, it was my human anatomy model, and eventually my human skeleton model.

Farqua: … What – ya didn’t go head-over-heels with anyone alive?

Doc: Of course not! Why would I experiment with those chips around people?!

Farqua: Oh. Well, I ain’t fallen in love yet. Maybe ‘cause I’ve yet to get the hots for anyone ‘round here. Even with the lust chip! Surprisin, huh! …Y’know, since I gotta admit, I do like to look a lil cuter, don’t I?

Eyn:  Uh… Well, there’s this uvra girl...

Farqua: …

Doc: …

Wyra: ...

Skatra: Eyn, you’ve fallen in love?!

 Can you cook?

Skatra: Well, yes! I have to eat to survive. It’s a human thing.

Doc: I’ve tried teaching myself to. It’s not that difficult, actually.

Wyra: I can, a bit! I’m not very skilled though, and people have just told me to just stick to working the gas, rather than actually working with the gas.

Eyn: Dad’s been teaching me some. He says I’m a natural, haha.

Farqua: Well, I sorta do. I ain’t that great at it, though. Shucks, I gotta up my cookin’ game!

 Do you despise the Earth?

Skatra: Not really. Earth is history after all, so why should I care so much?

Farqua: Some people hate stuff from the past, y’know,

Skatra: That’s fair.

Doc: Well, despite everything, I’m pretty indifferent.

Wyra: Earth’s pretty cool if you ask me. Shame I can’t actually see it for myself, though.

Eyn: I don’t know much about Earth. But Axel lives in that place, so that’s cool.

Farqua: I’m all about Earth! There ain’t nothin else I’ve been readin’ about lately!

 What's your pet peeve?

Skatra: When anyone leaves anything personal unlocked. Imagine seeing a bag or a house’s door left open. How do people even do that? I remember back in high school nobody would lock their lockers unless they actually had to. It bothered me so much to the point where I locked one of my classmates’. That was also the time I made my first enemy. Well, not really; the person barely knew me! But they swore they’d kill me.

Doc: The fact that engineers aren’t being as creative with android antennae anymore! Are they not accepting creatives into the industry anymore or something? ...No offence, Farqua.

Farqua: Yeah, fine. Whatever.

Wyra: I think my pet peeve is when people are super nitpicky and pick out really small and meaningless details, as if they’re gonna do something big. Like, what’s the point?

Eyn: When people talk over TV shows and movies and stuff. Why would you even do that?

Farqua: Hm… I think I hate when people run over plants. Y’know, like the ones that ain’t grass n’ all that. They’re alive, too, y’know! And they especially don’t get stepped on like that!

 What kind of music to you like?

 Skatra: I’ve enjoyed all forms of jazz. I think big band’s my favourite.

Doc: This might be surprising, but I actually prefer genres like breakbeat. Or, if I want to relax, I’ll listen to space ambiance.

Wyra: Happy hardcore, hardstyle, handsup - anything that’s energising, really!

Eyn: Rock n’ roll and blues are my favourites. Maybe some ska-punk, too. I feel like a total badass when listening to them.

Farqua: I love some good punk rock, or maybe even add somethin’ like some folkier flavour to songs like those! 

 What's your favorite food?

 Skatra: Tiramisu. I don’t have it often, but I guess that’s why it’s my favourite.

Doc: ...I’m a robot. But I’ve always wanted to try dark chocolate.

Wyra: Me too! I don’t know what they taste like, but maybe cheese and nachos will do it for me!

Eyn: Dad’s always told me about different foods, but I think he’s described ramen noodles the best.

Farqua: I been told that honey-lemon chicken tastes great! I really wanna taste that!

 Are you bored, want to kill me, satisfied with this quiz, etc.?

Skatra: I’ve been enjoying it a bit, actually.

Doc: Me too. I was afraid I’d get bored. ...Sorry.

Wyra: I enjoyed it! It was a lot of questions to get through though, but I’m still here!

Eyn: Eh, it was cool, I guess…

Farqua: I ain’t gonna kill ya, I promise! ...I mean, it was good! 

 Who's your favorite villain other than yourself?

Skatra: I don’t know. Why would I have a favourite villain? Or if you’re talking about the people in this group, I guess, it’s Eyn. She’s my daughter, after all.

Doc: Wyra’s one of my closest friends. Of course, I’d pick her.

Wyra: Right back at you, Sarlife!

Eyn: I guess, I’ve just got my dad. Or, if you meant it that way, I really like one named Taft Grater. He’s one of the villains of the Axel Duiti series. He’s really well written.

Farqua: Huh! This is a tough one! I dunno, maybe Wyra.

 Do you think you're gonna die in your story?

Skatra: I don’t know. Like everyone else, I hope not, but I’ll just take what’s thrown at me.

Doc: Let’s hope I don’t!

Wyra: I don’t think I’ll die!

Eyn: I hope not, too.

Farqua: WELL, I BETTER NOT!!!

 Well, I have to go, and I'm sure you have a lot of evil scheming to do. Peace out! (Or should I say "destruction out!" in your cases?) For your creators, go tag someone! Please, it won't take long!

 Me lol: (Sorry! :’D)

Anything to add now that I'm done rambling?

Me lol: Not really, actually! but it was fun :D

Look! Please do it if you have villains, and credit me!

Please spread the word! 

(I don't have much time, I have a timed session, as I'm using some random wifi server, so I'll add more later!)

(c) me

[the-princess-atta]

Fairy Lights || Attendy

Summary: This honestly took place in like September but it’s alright its cool its going well and we post things at a normal time. First dates with Attendy. 

@flippin--corduroy

WENDY

It was a pretty nice summer night out. Breeze came in off the lake and everything seemed like a normal Friday night in Swynlake. People were out on dates and looking all coupled up and well, Wendy Corduroy found herself in the same boat as all of those people.

Wendy had a date with a fairy. Like a really cute fairy. A cute fairy who liked woodworking and trees and nature and was just as excited as she was about it all. To be honest, Wendy played it off like dates were totally normal and cool by her. She went on plenty, and even more hookups usually happened at places like Pixie’s. But deep down she was very much not ice cold, she was pretty nervous. And on top of that she’d never went on a date with someone like Atta before (at least not that she knew of and definitely not personality wise either) and Wendy had set herself up to introduce her to a lot of ‘clumsy’ firsts. 

But you wouldn’t really be able to tell all of that if you looked at her. Wendy stood there outside Chippamunka, looking a bit more dressed up than usual. Her jeans didn’t have quite as many rips in them and her button down plaid shirt had zero wrinkles in it. She wore boots that were definitely not meant for the workshop. And you know, she even put like a little bit of mascara and eyeliner on just because you know, you gotta highlight the assets and everything. She tucked her hands in her pockets and looked around for the familiar smiley fairy sight that was Atta.

As she spotted the girl, her grin widened and she just gave a wave, before the fairy got close enough for her to give her a bit of a friendly hug, “Hey! Wow, you look like super pretty.” She motioned behind herself to the restaurant, “I reserved us a table inside so you get the whole restaurant experience.”

ATTA: 

Atta meant what she said: she did not know the first thing about going on a date. 

It wasn’t just a pixie thing, unfortunately. What she had purposefully not mentioned was the reason for her undating-- a once great and rare destiny to become the queen of a Hollow, which unfortunately left little time or space for the pleasures and anxieties of romance. It wasn’t exactly forbidden...not in any of the history books. Many queens and kings did enter into promises in the last stretch of their lives after they gave up their duties. But Atta’s days used to be schedules from one flit to the next, and that schedule took her far away from the world of the other fairies her own age. It never bothered her much, to be honest. She grew up with a certain set of expectations. And whatever free time she did have, Atta much preferred to use having adventures with Dot or bothering Flik down in the tinker tunnels. 

But Swynlake was a brand new life and a brand new Atta and that Atta had no grand destiny, so maybe she said yes to a date with Wendy just because she could. It was not the only reason, but it was a very, very big reason. She collapsed back against her cot with her phone pressed over her heart and looked up at the ceiling in wonder. “I’m going on a date,” she said out loud, to hear it and imagine it taking shape in front of her, something solid she could hold in her hands. She read over her texts again and repeated herself, a smile growing on her lips. “I’m going on a date.” 

No idea what it meant. No idea what it was like! But here she was anyway, after fussing with her various pixie and clumsy clothes and coming up with a kind of hybrid: her one pair of clumsy jeans, her favourite tinker ankle boots with the pretty bells, and a soft green halter appropriate for these warm summer months. She braided a loose crown around her head and didn’t dare look at her reflection or else she knew she’d fuss with all the pieces and get too self-conscious and just cancel this whole thing. She headed straight for the location instead, trying to outrun her second-guessing (Atta was prone to second-guessing). 

When she saw Wendy, her cheeks ripened like strawberries. “Really? Oh, frost, that’s-- very responsible of you. You ehm, you look nice too. I like your shirt, it’s very--stripey.” 

Stripey. Atta touched one of her eartips self-consciously. “I mean! We don’t have patterns like that in the Hollow.” 

WENDY

The redhead just grinned a bit at being called responsible. She did count herself as fairly responsible. She had her own apartment (with Dipper) and school and work and she had time to plan dates with pretty fairies too. Plus, she guessed having three younger crazy brothers and dealing with a Dad who was a little out of touch with reality kind of made her a bit responsible earlier on.

“You guys don’t have plaid? Wow, that’s like a clumsy staple. We should look into getting you some stripey plaid, it comes in all kinds of colors. And I’m positive it would look great on you.” She opened the door to the restaurant and held it open for Atta, “Right this way to your first restaurant experience.”

They walked through Chippamunka, the smell of spinach in the air as Wendy led them over to their small table by the window in a diner booth. “So, here’s the deal, you can either go with what you think looks dope on the menu.” She held the piece of plastic coated paper up, “Or, you can ask our waiter what their favorite dishes are and that just kind of makes the whole thing easier if you’ve never been to a place before.” 

She felt like a tour guide, honestly this whole restaurant thing was kind of weird sounding when you said it all outloud to another person. “Also do you like, eat meat or are fairies like vegetarians? Because they have plenty of options for whatever.”

ATTA: 

Now this part, Atta could do. 

That was nothing to brag about. The basics of going to a restaurant simply mirrored going to many of the different food stands and restaurants in the Hollow. There was of course the main kitchens, which many of the kitchen-talents worked in. They prepared food and laid it out buffet-style for fairies to take as much as they pleased (but of course, not too much). But there were a few other little restaurants, usually with different hours than the main meal times. Some were quite casual, meant for a flutter-by and to take the food back home to eat in privacy. But others, a fairy could sit down and enjoy being waited on by the serving-talents.

She didn’t know how to say all this to Wendy, because she didn’t want to come across as rude or make Wendy feel embarrassed. She was right, anyway, to assume that clumsy restaurants were quite different from fairy ones. They probably were--in all kinds of little ways that Atta hadn’t noticed yet. 

“Most fairies are vegetarian, though winter fairies usually eat fish. It’s an important part of our diet,” explained Atta first. She reached forward to fiddle with the silverware, unrolling it from the napkin. “It’s different from culture to culture too, I’ve learned. There’s a fairy in my Hollow whose originally from Korea, and they eat more meat and fish as well. I personally don’t eat much though.”

She looked down at the menu. “My, this is...a lot of options.” She blinked. “How do they prepare all of this?”  

WENDY

Wendy nodded and stored that information in her little fairy file she was compiling in her brain. She was learning a whole lot just from talking to Atta and texting her every now and then about the case. (Well, and the odd like meme and reference). “So like, was ice fishing big where you’re from then? Because I mean, you guys basically lived in snow like all the time, right?” 

She ran a hand through her hair and leaned back a bit with a smile at Atta’s question, “Lots of storage space and practice, I’d guess. Have everything like at the ready to go. And Kronk is like one of the best chef’s in town. Super dedicated. I’ve talked to him a couple times he’s a real nice dude.”

She smiled at the waiter who brought them their water glasses. He looked like some college freshman in his first job. “Hey there.” He briefly gave them a spiel about the catch of the day and their specials before asking them if they wanted anything else to drink aside from the water.

“Nah, water is good for me.” She smiled over at the waiter and then Atta, “ I think we’re definitely gonna get the spinach puffs to start though. No idea on anything else, Kronk’s always got so much working at the same time so I think we’re gonna need a minute or two. Like honestly, Chippamunka probably has the biggest menu in Swynlake.”

ATTA:

Atta liked listening to Wendy talk.

She had never been especially chatty herself. She left that to the chipmunks and to her constituents, for a royal-talent should above all else listen first. She learned to save her words and polish them...though she waited too long and polished too cleanly, which led to this terrible habit of being caught off-guard when asked an opinion out of nowhere. Then she’d stutter and uhm and ah and er. Wendy didn’t stutter. She also didn’t talk prettily, but that was part of the reason Atta liked listening to her so much. She said things in a funny way-- and secretly Atta’s heart fluttered in interest at these words, such as her fondness for “like” and also “dope” and now “dude.”

She nodded along then as Wendy conversed with their ‘dope’ dude waiter. “Water for me as well, thank you,” she added before looking back at the menu as the waiter moved away. 

And then her curiosity got the best of her.

Atta leaned forward. “May I ask a question? A little while ago you said, um-- dope? What’s that mean?” she asked eagerly. 

She could add it to her collection of new words. 

WENDY

The redhead just watched as the waiter went off and took their drink orders before smiling back at Atta. God, she was just so pretty wasn’t she? Just like the perfect cute face and her hair was golden like a bunch of sunflower petals. 

Wendy nodded as she asked the question and then just kind of chuckled, one because she didn’t even think about things when she said them and two, because Atta looked like a eager beaver waiting to gnaw through a log and make its home.

“Oh dope? Well…” She scrunched her brows up a bit, trying to not use another slang word to describe it. Like she couldn’t say dope meant like cool or sweet because those meant other things too. She then remembered something from their texts and perked up, “Oh! You know how like, I think one time you said flitterific? Or something like that? It’s like that. It means great but like a little more than that you know?”

She scratched her head a bit, “Wow, I’m trying to think about all the times I said slang words at you and didn’t even realize it. My bad. But hey, just like think of me as your personal clumsy slang translator. Like a clumsy-ary? A dictionclumsy?” She let out a laugh, bit bashful at her terrible attempts. “Well, you know what I mean.”

ATTA:

Great, but a little more than that.

Atta’s mouth opened as the understanding washed right over her. Great, but a little more than that-- like you, Atta thought, but didn’t say. Those two words jumped to the tip of her tongue but before they could fall out, ungraceful and silly and very un-royal-like of her, Wendy was laughing and talking again in her usual Wendy-way. Atta’s lips pressed back together. She’d keep it to herself, though later on, maybe she’d write ‘dope’ in her journal and ‘Wendy’ right beside. How easy that word would be to remember, with such a lovely example right in front of her.

Atta nodded. “I do, though you shouldn’t feel badly because obviously I said fairy slang right back at you and didn’t realize it. So that makes me your--dictionfairy.” Atta punned with a little shoulder shimmy. “I think it’s fun anyway, learning new words. Or new things in general. It was all overwhelming at first, but now I look forward to what I’ll learn in a day. It’s--dope,” Atta tried out the word. “Did I use that right?” 

WENDY

Just looked at Atta with the biggest grin on her face, honestly, this was definitely one of the better dates she’d been on and this was just getting started. I mean, they’d barely ordered an appetizer. 

Speaking of--

As Wendy laughed in reply to the dictionfiary comment because that was a good one, really. A+ on the pun scale and the + was really for the shoulder shimmy which made the lighting of the restaurant catch the contours of Atta’s face and lips and made her hair and eyes shine just that much more, their waiter came back with their spinach puffs and Wendy’s stomach already felt like it was going to engulf itself with how good they smelled, she leaned over around the arms setting the plate down to reply, “Yeah, for sure. Excellent usage.”

The waiter then interrupted and asked what they’d like to get for their main course, Wendy had to take her focus off of Atta and look up at the guy, “Oh, sure, I’ll get the bacon grilled cheese. I know it’s like the main thing everyone gets but who doesn’t like bacon, cheese and bread.” She then added as an aside, looking to Atta a bit sheepishly, “I mean, unless you’re like vegetarian which is totally cool.”

ATTA:

Yes, Atta was a vegetarian-- well, a pescaterian. Fish was a massive part of winter fairies’ diet as it was good protein that kept them warm. Still, she’d never had bacon before. Part of her was tempted to try it if only because Atta quite liked trying new things. But then she thought way too much about it and her stomach curled at the thought, and she better not after all. 

“I am, but I’ll take this comment as one of cultural importance to clumsies,” said Atta, really only half-teasing. “Cheese, bread, and bacon, an important part of your diet. I think my equivalent would...well, mostly be bread. I love bread.” 

The clumsy waiter cleared his throat.

“Oh! I forgot you were there,” said Atta, then blushed because she said that out loud. “I mean, um-- I’ll just-- do the stuffed pepper, thank you.” 

The waiter gathered their menus and left. Instantly, Atta scrunched her face as she watched him go. “Oh. I was enjoying reading that.” 

WENDY

Wendy chuckled, “I mean you’re not wrong. You’d definitely find like plenty of other people who would agree with me. Of course, unless they’re like lactose intolerant or gluten intolerant or like a vegan/vegetarian.” She leaned forward and whispered as an aside with a teasing grin, “I couldn’t imagine being any of those.”

“I mean, you cannot go wrong with bread. What’s your favorite? Do fairies have like magically baked bread? Is there like a traditional fairyloaf? Is it like nutbread?” She squinted a bit, wondering about it herself before continuing, “Also, fun thing about phones is that you can totally look at menus online and stuff so you can enjoy reading all the different restaurants in Swynlake and take your pick and not be like rushed when you get here to read the whole menu.”

It didn’t take too long for their waiter to return with the spinach puffs and she just sat up a bit and smiled a warm and charming smile before she said, “Could we like keep a menu at the table? Just in case we feel like ordering like dessert or another appetizer or something.” She was handed back a menu before the waiter walked off to check on another table, “Thanks much, dude.”

She turned back to Atta, looking at her over the steam of the spinach puffs, “Your reading material, m’lady, should you want it and get totally bored of my company.” She was teasing and just slid the menu along the side of the table to her before motioning for her to grab a spinach puff, “After you. First pick always goes to the cutest one at the table.”

ATTA:

Atta laughed as Wendy peppered her with bread-related questions, her eyes crinkling up. She liked that about Wendy-- she was quite forward, the opposite of Atta, and she never seemed to be bothered or embarrassed by anything. At this, that’s how she came across. Maybe she was spinning herself in circles on the inside, the way that Atta was doing--

Well, she wasn’t, actually. Not right now. Right now she was relaxed, her eyes bright, happy to be in this very strange place with all the new things to poke at and question. It didn’t make her nervous, not here. If she made a fool of herself (and she was certain she was), Wendy would only laugh with her. 

She reached for the spinach puff. “We don’t magically bake our bread by the way. It’s done very similarly to the way that clumsies do it-- with kneading and proofing and all that. I think the difference is very subtle. Kitchen-talents never use clocks for anything, you know, they simply know exactly when the bread is ready to go into the oven, and then when it’s ready to come out again. That’s the best part of a talent. The way it comes so naturally, like-- like taking a breath or fluttering your wings--” 

She took a bite out of the spinach puff and her eyes widened. “Mmm, this is great!” 

She instantly grabbed two more and put them on her small plate. 

WENDY

Wendy did internally feel a bit nervous whenever she made forward advances. But there was a thrill in it. An adventure in not knowing how it would land (and a bit anxiety as well, if she was honest, she wasn’t immune to anxious feelings despite her cool exterior) or what the person might do or say next. 

The redhead’s attention was on all of the information Atta was saying, but also very focused on the way her eyes smiled as she spoke about baking talents and the way she held up a spinach puff to her lips before taking a bite. 

Wendy could only laugh and grin happily at Atta’s reaction before joining in the meal herself. 

And so that’s how the evening went. The two of them at Chippamunka’s enjoying food and each other’s company while picking each other’s brains on their different cultures.

Wendy paid their bill and they walked out of the restaurant into the brisk air of the night, heading over towards Oaken’s so Wendy could show off her case. “I’m glad we got to do this.” She grinned over at the smaller girl, hands tucking into her pockets. “Happy that you yelled at me the first time we met.” 

ATTA:

Atta had never known how a date would go. She had plenty of data, of course. She listened to other fairies talk about their courtships and supported them with smiles and with questions. She liked hearing about such things because she liked to imagine how things would be like, though she knew that it wasn’t meant for her-- and that was alright. She never felt compelled into romance. She never fell for anyone. She was loved by the people who mattered most, her sister, her parents, Flik, her King-- 

But in this new life, the question of love existed behind a door, just cracked open. Maybe she wanted it only because of that curiosity. Maybe that was half of the reason she said yes.

But now she was here on this date and-- she was glad that she’d said yes. She felt like a different person next to Wendy Corduroy. And she liked that person. She thought that person could be happy.

And so her heart was beating rather quickly as they faced each other, Atta wondering what came next (but knowing...knowing because she’d heard the stories, but didn’t know, didn’t know if her story would go the same way…)

“I didn’t mean to yell at you!” Atta exclaimed now and laughed a bit shyly, red in the face again. “I don’t think it was a -- a yell persay anyway. You’ll know when I yell, trust me.” She was rambling a bit, because of those nerves. “I get a bit puffed up like a hedgehog. My hair gets crazy too. I was simply-- I was reprimanding. I’m very good at that. Being a big sister and all…” 

WENDY

The redhead had like an inkling of this date probably going well. It wasn’t that Wendy didn’t have a good time on dates, because usually she could make a good time out of anything, it was just the question of whether or not that good time would be as like friends or as like seal this date with a kiss kind of good time. 

And boy did Wendy want to kiss Atta. Really, half of what her brain had been focusing on was what Atta spoke and then the other half was about how Atta spoke. The ways she talked and her accent inflected with the curve of a lip or tongue. It was a good thing she had food to keep her busy in her moments or she’d just gawk at the fairy. 

Wendy just grinned at her, “I hope I’ll never have to find out.” She gave a bit of a wink as she jingled the key to Oaken’s she’d borrowed in her pocket as they got to the storefront. “At least not in that it would be directed at me. You might be a really cute hedgehog when your fury is directed towards someone else.”

They made it up to Oaken’s (it was a pretty short walk from the restaurant) and she quickly unlocked the door and let them in, flipping one light switch on just so they could get to the back. Afterall, she didn’t want people to start coming up and thinking that they were open while Wendy was showing Atta around. 

It was so quiet in the shop. No people. Just the smells of different woods around them, like being in a forest at night. “So, this is Oaken’s at night. Very rare sight for most people, but sometimes if I have a pretty big project I’ll spend a few hours at night trying to put some things in order. Oh, and like, gifts to friends. I’ve spent a couple evenings after hours working on your log case.” She was almost a bit bashful about it, it was like really admitting she had feelings or something enough to spend extra time to get something done off the clock. 

ATTA:

Atta knew that dates could end with kisses. 

She didn’t think that was where this was going to go. In fact, Atta was lost in the date now-- no more thinking about all the shoulds or what ifs or the stories from her friends. It was like she was back in the forest when she first met Wendy, and a silly little conversation about the rules of cutting (or not cutting) trees had become this whole long-winded back-and-forth of names and personal details. Thinking back on the meeting always made Atta laugh. She’d told Dot about it while giggling and blushing, though Dot hadn’t been as amused. But that was what Wendy did for Atta-- she made her laugh. She made her interested in things. She made her ask questions and see the clumsy world as something beautifully odd, instead of scary or dangerous.

No where was more beautifully odd than Wendy’s workshoppe either. She’d already been here once of course. When Atta stepped in now, she took a deep breath, nostrils tickled with all that fresh sawdust. It was night, of course, and the big space chilled easily, but something about the way wood smelled always made Atta feel warm. 

Or maybe it was just the bright lights that Wendy flicked on.

Or maybe it was Wendy grinning at her.

Whatever it was, Atta wandered in, let herself move slow and let her eyes linger on the workshoppe, now transformed in its quiet and solitude. She could take her time after all. She had nowhere to be. 

“That sounds a lot like me,” commented Atta quietly and she wandered up to Wendy’s side. She looked up and smiled. “I love working in the Tinker workshoppe at night, too. Though I don’t actually do much tinkering...I write out lists. Usually for what I’ll do the next day.” Atta’s eyes dropped. Her hand skimmed over the surface of the table she was standing in front of. “I know that sounds absurdly boring-- my sister, she always calls me boring. But I dunno, it makes me excited to wake up and get started.” 

WENDY

The redhead just stood there and watched Atta take in the workshoppe all over again. Normally, because she was working with tools and saws and all kind of dangerous things, she’d have all the lights on so really it was kind of a reflex that she’d turned them on and not left them like romanctically in the dark or something. The whole thing was kind of a hazard if you were trying to set a mood in here. But that’s what she had her other lights for, she’d get to those.

“Well, you know, I wouldn’t be anything without planning. Measure twice, cut once and all of that ya know?” She reached over for the notebook on the drafting table and pulled it out to show it off to Atta, getting even closer to her to flip through the pages. Schematics and numbers and drawings of wood pieces with the sketch of the case she’d made. There were lists too, of different hardware pieces she needed to order.  “You kinda can’t totally wing a piece of furniture. I mean, that’s why I whittle when I need to chill out, that’s just shaping wood, it’s not building or anything. It’s just carving away any which way your hands want to take you.” 

She glanced at Atta from looking at her notebook, eyes connecting with hers. And as much as she wanted to kiss her right now, it was not the correct moment, she still had things to do. “So, I’m gonna ask that you close your eyes for just a little bit. Gift giving is a total surprise after all.”

She meandered her way back towards the storage area where she kept pieces that had been nearly finished and almost ready to put out into the store and tugged the cloth she kept over it to make sure she didn’t scratch or get saw dust all over it. She lifted it up, it wasn’t too heavy, she had kind of designed it that way, but it was still big enough to hold the log so it wasn’t exactly the easiest piece to carry, especially with its doors and drawers. 

She set the piece down gently in front of Atta and reached over to shut the lights off again, but this time, she leaned down and plugged in the strings of twinkling lights she’d hung around the workshoppe so she’d still be able to see the case but it’d be more like magical. 

She looked at the case and smiled at her handiwork, fairly proud of it. Just as she’d said she would make it. It was one solid medium sized piece with a glass door on it and shelves that could be removed so that a stand of some sort could be placed inside it to hold the log. It was made of oak wood that she’d gotten from the forest here (It had a drawer on the bottom as well, just because she couldn’t forsake all functionality and make it just a display case). Oak meant strength and knowledge, things she felt would be good to surround Atta’s white fir with. To protect it with. There were little patterns of leaves and flowers carved into the top surface of it as well, ones Atta had mentioned to her in their texts.

She tucked her hands into her pockets and just stood a bit away from the case, grinning a bit sheepishly, “Okay, you can look now.”

ATTA:

Oh, yes. Closing her eyes.

She did not know why she immediately got nervous. There was no reason for it here. In this shoppe, Atta felt...not just safe but-- closer to home than she had in many weeks. She loved the tinker workshoppe in the Hollow of course, but she knew that she did not belong there. She couldn’t get lost in any of the tiny projects, for there was always a voice in the back of her mind that told Atta she was going to get found out, that she should never have lied, that she was doing everything, all this tinkering, all wrong, just as she’d done her royalty duties all wrong…

But here, she was just Atta. Wendy knew nothing of talents. She did not look at Atta and see all the things that she wasn’t. Atta hoped that Wendy looked at her and saw… 

Well, she didn’t know, actually, what she wanted Wendy to think of her. She just wanted Wendy to think of her at all. And that was why she was nervous. 

And so as she closed her eyes, she couldn’t help but listen-- to strain her ears for every shuffle of Wendy’s feet, the creaking of doors, anything. She heard as Wendy went away and as she came back again. And she felt her when she was close...as if Wendy really was a wind, a gentle one, fluttering through Atta’s hair. 

“Okay you can look now.”

Atta opened her eyes at once. 

She didn’t see the case first. The warm hanging lights caught her attention first. Her mouth opened, and she looked around at them. “They’re fairy lights!” she exclaimed in her surprise-- but of course they weren’t. They did not float on their own, but rather hung in strings. “Oh, or not, I thought....” 

And then her eyes dropped to what she actually should be looking at and her breath caught in her throat.

She did not say anything at first. Instead, Atta reached out and her hand hovered around the corners, where there were beautifully carved embellishments. She took another step toward it, but still did not dare to touch it, as if it was made out of something fragile. But she knew that it was oak; of course she knew. And so she knew that it was a strong wood that would protect her fir no matter the weather.

She looked up at Wendy, tiny tears shining in her eyes that reflected the lights. “It’s so beautiful,” she whispered. She didn’t know why she whispered when no one else was here but…

This entire night felt like a secret. She wanted to hold it close and share it with no one. 

“Thank you,” she said. “Every time I see it, I’ll think of you.” 

WENDY

The redhead chuckled a bit as she commented on the lights, looking up at them and scratching her head a bit, “Well, I guess they’re fairy lights for non-fairies. Kind of the best we’ve got.” 

Wendy watched as Atta took in the case, her eyes tracing along what the woodworker had spent hours sanding and carving and staining, nurturing the case from a very heavy slab of oak wood to a piece just enough for the girl next to her. 

Atta didn’t really say anything at first to Wendy filled in the space sort of talking half to herself really because Atta was more focused on the piece in front of her as Wendy’s heart like hammered into her rib cage, “Yeah, I mean I know it’s a bit big now that I’m kind of looking at you standing next to it and I’ll probably have to deliver it out to like the edge of the forest. I don’t know if I’m like allowed to do deliveries or anything to the Hollow itself, but maybe that Sled guy who’s helped you at the shoppe that you’ve talked about can help you move it into your place--”

And then Atta spoke and Wendy shut up immediately, biting on her lip and a sheepish sort of grin appearing on her face, “I, um, well, I’m glad you like it.” She didn’t know why the whisper of the words made her heart feel a weird pain or why it sent a kind of chill through her. 

She shrugged one shoulder, “I wanted to make something that was strong, but not something that was rough or hard or bulky. Something that would protect but wouldn’t suffocate it. It wasn’t something that I wanted to stand out over the fir either, because the whole point is to show it off. So I figured the oak would do the trick.”

Wendy didn’t really get nervous when she was flirting with someone. It was a game at that point. But this wasn’t a game. There wasn’t a score to keep track of and no one was counting points. Wendy hadn’t done this to earn anything but the smile and, well she guessed, the small tears in Atta’s eyes. 

Wendy stepped forward, a small smile on her face as she stood next to Atta, “I just hope you don’t cry every time you think of me.” It was a small joke, but the air between them wasn’t diffused by the humor because the minute Wendy stepped closer, she didn’t want to move away and she wouldn’t. Her hand moved to take Atta’s, squeezing it gently. Her hands seemed so small compared to hers, not as rough or anything like that, her eyes looked down into glistening ones, “You know, if you’re thinking about giving me a case back. I don’t really need one. I think about you plenty without one.” 

And then Wendy leaned down and pressed her lips to Atta’s.

ATTA: 

Wendy stepped closer.

Wendy took her hand.

And Atta felt-- that she was big and small all at once, both the tree and the flower upon its branch. She had never felt such things before. She was born important, born with a magic so rare that to realize its true beauty one must wait a lifetime to see it flourish. Because of that, she’d always been small to herself, just a seedling, and a shy one. As the princess of the Orkney Hollow, she felt she would never grow. She would stay this tiny thing forever.

But Wendy looked at her like she’d already bloomed. 

“Oh,” she murmured, her cheeks blushing, her eyes shining. Her hand clenched a little in Wendy’s and she nearly pulled away as Wendy leaned down--

I shouldn’t, she thought, but didn’t move. 

Why shouldn’t she? Why hide herself anymore? Here, she could be herself.

And so Wendy kissed her. 

It was Atta’s first kiss. She didn’t really know what to do with it, this strange press of lips, wet and warm against her own. She’d read of great romances and heard stories from her friends, and so she could describe a kiss in perfect, accurate detail. But describing a kiss as if it were a thing to study was not the same thing as experiencing it. All those stories washed away. Oh, she thought again, her eyes wide open so she could see Wendy’s face against her own and count her eyelashes, if she wanted.

This whole time, you know, she had thought of Wendy like a tree-- tall, strong, steady, beautiful. Up close, her eyelashes were the softest things about her. They made Atta wonder about the rest of Wendy. What had she missed, standing just a metre away, that she could now see with fresh eyes up close? 

And what could she see if she closed her eyes?

Atta did then. They fluttered closed and she pressed back against Wendy. Her hand went to one of Wendy’s arms. Their lips fluttered against each other, gently, like butterfly wings. It was a simple, soft kiss and it ended in a few seconds. But when it did, Atta thought she would love to do that again. 

She was blushing bright red, absolutely. “Was that okay?” she blurted, very embarrassingly. “I’ve never done that before.” 

WENDY

The kiss was good. It wasn’t by any means the most passionate kiss Wendy had been part of. It wasn’t full of want. It was just nice and sort of made Wendy feel a little floaty like she’d grown her own pair of fairy wings by kissing Atta. 

It was so soft that Wendy wanted to do it again almost immediately but at Atta’s words she realized that she had to handle this a little more delicately than the last few she’d had. She honestly hadn’t expected this to be Atta’s first, but she was glad she’d gone to all this effort to make it sort of special without really knowing it. She looked at Atta, a small smile on her face as she tucked Atta’s hair behind her ears while looking down at her, her arm tingling where Atta’s hand pressed up against the fabric of her long sleeves. 

She was fucking cute when she was all red wasn’t she?

“Yeah, it was good.” Wendy murmured out, hand slipping along the small of Atta’s back. The truth was that Wendy liked the idea of being Atta’s first kiss. And her second and third and whatever beyond that that this could develop into. “I’ll, uh, let you in on a little tip. It gets even better the more you do it.” The corner of her mouth turned up a bit in a smirk as she leaned down and pressed another soft kiss to Atta’s lips, dragging the kiss out slowly, letting their lips move against each other with the only sound of their breaths in between the parting of their mouths. Her hand cupped Atta’s cheek with a very light touch before her fingers found themselves in blonde tresses during the kiss.

As they parted again, Wendy’s grin only widened as her eyes opened once more, “See? You’ll be an expert in no time. Captain of kissing talents.”

[thewritewolf]

Nino’s Quest Chapter 1: Gathering the Party

When his uncle leaves for Morocco, it looks like Nino might be stuck without any Dungeons and Dragons for a few months. Since this is a terrible fate, Nino takes it upon himself to make a campaign of his very own.

Now if only he could find a party...

Thank you to @alienducky for inspiring me to expand on this one shot from last year’s fictober prompt! And thanks to @marinoodles for letting me steal her name!

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 (Final)

Enjoy!

Read on Ao3. My ko-fi.

“As you clutch Raygar close, he whispers a single name into your ear as if it were the most important thing in the world: ‘Doznak.’ The moment the word passes his lips, the light leaves his eyes.”

“No! Not my dude Raygar!” Nino wailed, his fist hitting the table, gently shaking the drinks that had been set on it.

“...And I think that’s where we’ll end this session. Thanks for coming out, you guys.” Uncle Hassan gave a hug to the other two party members as they left, leaving just him and Nino to pick up. “Thanks for the help, little man. How are you liking this campaign?”

“It’s totally awesome, uncle dude!” Nino raised his voice to be heard as he carried the glasses to the kitchen and left them in the sink. “Each story gets better than the last. And man! Tonight’s cliffhanger. I can’t wait to get the low down on who this Doznak dude is next week.”

When he returned, he saw his uncle smiling sheepishly and rubbing the back of his neck. “Yeah… about that.”

“What?”

“I’m going to be visiting your grandpa in Tangier. So, uh, you might be waiting on that thrilling conclusion for a while.”

Giving his uncle a suspicious look, he asked, “How long is a ‘while’, exactly?”

“I won’t be back until New Year’s, kiddo.”

Nino gaped. “Dude!” He said, betrayed. “We’re only just at the end of summer! How am I supposed to wait that long?!”

Uncle Hassan chuckled. “Well, you’ll be starting school soon. That’ll help keep your mind off it, right?”

“Maybe a little.” Nino pouted and pulled his cap down, trying to hide his disappointment.

A large hand settled on his shoulder and Nino looked up into the hazel eyes of his uncle. “Kiddo, you’ve been doing great and it’s been fantastic having you around in the game. But sometimes groups have to take a break for a while. These things happen.”

Nino sagged. “But… I was just getting the hang of Dungeons and Dragons…”

“Well, you don’t have to stop.” Nino looked up, curiosity getting the better of him. “My books are just going to get dusty waiting for me here. Why don’t you take them and make a campaign of your own? Invite your friends. Trust me, it’ll be way more fun than playing with us geezers.” Uncle Hassan laughed, his eyes sparkling with mirth.

His friends? Nino thought of Adrien, with his impenetrably dense schedule. Alya and her lack of interest in games, whether they be board games or video games. Marinette and her tendency to always be juggling fifty projects at once. Although… they weren’t his only friends, right? It couldn’t be that hard to find two or three people willing to game with him like once a week.

“You know… you might be onto something.” A grin reached Nino’s face as he took the rulebooks that his uncle passed him. Outside, a car honked its horn - his dad was there to pick him up.

“Tell my brother-in-law I said hello. And good luck, kiddo!”

Nino waved and felt his mind light up with the possibilities of adventure.

--------------------

The last month of summer went by in a blur as Nino put his mind to work getting his campaign drafted. When school started, he took a few weeks to get back into the swing of things before he started the hunt for a new party.

That’s where he hit a snag.

There weren’t that many Dungeons and Dragons players in his class. Or, at least, not many that he knew of. He managed to corner all three of them during lunch and pitched his campaign to them.

“...So what’d ya think, dudes? Sound like a party or what?”

Max cleared his throat and pushed up his glasses. “I really am very sorry, Nino, but I’ve been kept adequately busy with my work on game design. While I’d love to join up, it would cut into my other projects. Regrettably, I’ll have to decline.”

“Alright, dude, no sweat.” Nino patted Max on the shoulder and turned toward the other two. “What about you guys?”

Juleka shook her head. “Sorry. I just started one with Rose. Can’t back out now, you know?”

“And I just got hooked on a new MMO with Ivan,” Mylene said with a wince. “If I stop now, I’ll lose my placing that I worked so hard for!”

“Major bummer.” Nino tugged at his cap as all four of them got up to return to their usual seats.

“According to my projections, I’ll have a greater likelihood of joining on the next adventure.”

“Maybe next campaign,” Mylene patted his arm as she walked past him.

“Yeah, we can try again next time.” Juleka paused. “Have you tried asking Adrien?”

Nino shook his head. “Nah, dude is always super busy.”

‘Sure, but he was asking me and Rose about D&D. I dunno, maybe just try it?”

“Really?” Nino perked up. His best friend had gone home for lunch, but he was still just a text away. “It might be worth a shot. Thanks, Juleka.”

“No problem. Good luck.”

Taking a seat at the table next to Alya, Nino shot a quick text to Adrien.

Nino: Heard you were asking about DnD. You game?

“What’s that about, babe?” Alya asked, looking over his shoulder.

“I’m trying to get a party together for Dungeons and Dragons.”

“Dang, and the first half of that sentence was so promising.”

“So is that a pass then?” Nino said with a faint smile. While sometimes he could get her to play games with him, he understood that it wasn’t her favorite. Just like how he didn’t share her love of rom coms, but indulged her every now and again.

“Yeah, babe. Although…” She looked at Marinette as she rushed into the building clutching a brown bag with the Dupain-Cheng bakery logo. “...there might be potential there.”

“Hey, guys!” Marinette sat down opposite them and opened the bag, passing some chocolatines to the two of them. “What’re we talking about?”

“Hey, M.” Alya leaned forward. “Do you ever play roleplaying games?”

“Um, sometimes? You know my favorite is fighting games, but I’m up for some adventure sometimes.” Marinette tilted her head to the side. “Why?”

“Well, Nino here was thinking about running a Dungeons and Dragons campaign…”

“I’m… not sure.” Marinette’s eyes widened. “Not that I’m not interested! It sounds like it’d be fun to do with friends. But I don’t know if I’ll be able to find the time. Plus-”

She was interrupted by the sound of Nino’s phone going off. He’d left it on the table, so everyone could see that it was from Adrien. A small smile crept across Nino’s face when he heard the little intake of breath when Marinette noticed.

“S-so, um, how’s- how’s Adrien?”

Poor dude. The guy isn’t even here and she is stuttering. Nino pulled up the text.

Adrien: Yes!!! I got all the rulebooks months ago and I’ve done my best to learn but no one plays. [sad cat emojii] Are you going to be a DM??

Chuckling, Nino sent him another message.

Nino: You bet! Would you be able to meet once a week?

The response was immediate.

Adrien: Maybe if I say I’m working on a group project? I could pull it off, yeah.

With a huge grin, he looked back up at the girls. “My boy is in!”

Marinette bounced up and down in place. “Then so am I!”

“Oh?” Alya leaned forward with a smirk. “What happened to not having the time?”

“I will find the time, I promise. But gaming with friends? And Adrien? Too good an opportunity to pass up.” She met Nino’s eyes and had the good graces to look sheepish.

“Nah, don’t worry about it. If this means I get more players, than I don’t mind.” He turned towards his girlfriend. “Speaking of more players… Now everybody else is in. How ‘bout you?”

Alya rolled her eyes with a smile. “I guess someone has to keep an eye on you hooligans.”

“Nice. This is going to be great!”

-------------------

Nino: And… we… are… LIVE!

We’ve been expecting you, Adrien Agreste

Marinette joined your party. Everyone look busy!

Alya is here, just as the prophecy foretold.

Nino: Say hello everybody

Adrien: Hello everybody

Nino: You’re hilarious

Marinette: hello! Hey guys!

Alya: Sup

Nino: We’ll be using this Discord server for all Dnd related things, k? Mostly for planning new sessions

Adrien: What about… spicy memes?

Nino: Know what, bro? I’ll make a channel that you can spam to your hearts content

Adrien: <3

Nino has changed his name to Lord DM

Alya: Seriously

Lord DM: Definitely

Adrien has changed his name to Adrien Regreste

Alya: Pffft

Adrien Regreste: Come on, Mari! Its what all the cool kids are doing!

Alya: Hey now

Marinette has changed her name to marinoodles

Marinoodles: ...How’s that?

Adrien Regreste: ;-; Its so cute. And also hilarious??

Marinoodles: I mena thank you! *mean

Alya has changed her name to Alya’ll Beware

Alya’ll Beware: Sweetie you know you can just edit your comments right

Marinoodles: ...Now I do.

Lord DM: Lol Anyway. How’s this weekend looking?

Alya’ll Beware: Just jumping right into it, arent you? But yeah I’m free

Marinoodles: I babysit Manon on sunday but saturday is clear!

Adrien Regreste: I can pull off saturday! Where are we meeting??

Lord DM: Whoever we meet at provides food. Since I am DM, I am exempt. (Plus my place is always supes crowded)

Adrien Regreste: Uh I can probably manage it off. Father will be out of town with Nathalie. The Gorilla is much more lenient hwen it’s just us.

Marinoodles: Gret sounding! *Thta sounds gerat! **That sounds great!

Adrien Regreste: Haha, yeah! I’m pumped to have you guys over. :)

----------------

Despite Nino’s fear of a repeat from last time, none of them were thrown out or belittled on their way to Adrien’s room. The worst that any of them received was an uncertain glare from the Gorilla as they filed upstairs.

As it turned out, the most difficult problem they had to face was Adrien’s purchasing habits. Nino had to explain to him that even though they were teenagers playing D&D, there was no way they’d be able to get through five pizzas and all the drinks he’d ordered. After he’d extracted a promise not to go overboard again, Nino went straight into explaining the basics and had them roll for stats.

“You sure about this, dude?” Nino leaned over Adrien’s shoulder and frowned at his character sheet. “I get you’re gonna be a bard, but max Charisma and low Wisdom just sounds like a recipe for disaster.”

Nino could just barely overhear Alya whisper to Marinette, “Attractive but kinda dense? Doesn’t that sound like someone we know…?”

“ALYA,” Marinette whispered back in a scandalized tone.

“Maybe, but that just means it might be more memorable, right?” Adrien looked up at Nino and couldn’t hold out against the excitement he saw in his eyes.

“Sure, bro.” Nino walked over to the girls. “And how’re you two hanging?” He craned his neck to see where Marinette was sticking her highest stats. “Dexterity… and intelligence? Good choices for a rogue.”

Marinette smiled. “Thanks! I’ve been thinking about her background. Get this - the rebel daughter of an elven baron.” She nudged Alya. “Pretty neat, right?”

“Wow, that sounds way cool, Marinette!” Adrien beamed at her and she melted.

“Than- than- Thanks, Adrien! You’re cool too!” She winced, but Adrien’s smile didn’t dim.

Nino raised an eyebrow as he noticed her hit points. “But, uh, why’d you stick your lowest stat in Constitution? Your dude isn’t gonna be able to take a hit.”

A sly smirk spread across her face. “I won’t need to take a hit if I play my character right.”

“Heh. Fair enough.” Nino turned his attention to Alya’s sheet, only to see it blank. “Um, something wrong, babe?”

“I dunno.” Alya shrugged. “I’m not big into games like you guys are, so its all going in one ear and out the other.”

“Well…” Nino took a seat next to her and thumbed through the core rulebook. “Maybe we should just keep it simple, right? So you can get your bearings.”

“A fighter?” Alya raised an eyebrow. “Seems kinda boring.”

“Yeah? How about a knight errant, looking for glory to make her name in the world? Rushing forward to defend the weak from the strong? Still sound boring?”

A grin split her face. “Now you’re speaking my language, cappy.”

“That’s Lord DM Cappy to you, babe.”

“Don’t push it.”

“Okay, so let me see if I get where we’re standing.” Adrien pushed the hair out of his face and looked at the three of them. He pointed to himself. “I’m a half-elf bard.” The finger shifted to Marinette who blushed and frantically waved at him. “Elven rogue.” Alya fell under his digit next. “Human fighter. Where does that leave you, Lord DM Cappy?”

Alya groaned and Nino chuckled. “Since someone needs to watch out for you guys, I’m going to be playing a human cleric. A priest of the sun.”

“Sounds like we’re pretty well balanced? Well,” Adrien ducked his head. “Except for me. Maybe it’d be better if I just played a wizard…?”

“N-no!” Marinette quickly interjected. “Adrien, you can be what-whatever you want to be!”

“Dude has a point. There is more to having fun than being the most efficient party possible, bro.”

“Alright.” Adrien relaxed. “Awesome.”

“Now, let’s get everything else sorted for character creation. And while we do that, I can tell you a little about the world you find yourselves in…”

As Nino began by telling them of the Good King Hamon, he felt a spark light up from within. He could already tell this was going to be the best campaign.

[sunlitblue]

To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before (3)

and here’s part three! sorry, this part doesn’t have too much plot stuff, but that’s only bc the next one is gonna be pretty exciting. thank you to everyone who’s been giving this story love, you’re all angels. enjoy! <3 (also i’m still figuring out some of the plot of this, so message me w your theories on who sent the letters or send me memes u think race would tag you in!) 

part 1 / part 2 / part 4 / part 5 / part 6 / part 7 / part 8

The next day, you stayed at school a little late, figuring you could catch Race after track practice to discuss your… arrangement. It also had the added benefit of allowing you to avoid Jack, who you knew was spending most afternoons at the community theatre across town, helping them paint backdrops for an upcoming show.

 (You weren’t stalking him, or memorising his schedule, or anything. You were just observant. You took note of behaviour. That was it.)

 Race was on his last lap around the track when he saw you sitting on the bleachers. You gave him a little wave and his face lit up with a smile. He winked and kept on running. When he was done, and presumably back in the locker room, your phone pinged with four rapid texts from an unknown number.

 hey babe I’m just showering and then I’ll come see you ;)

this is race btw

i’m really good at texting like a boyfriend

fake or otherwise

Even though he couldn’t see you, you rolled your eyes anyway.

 Yeah, okay hotshot

Come find me on the bleachers when you’re ready

When Race showed up, with a red face and wet, curly hair he gave you a cheeky grin, looked around to see some of the track team boys were still milling around, and he placed a quick peck on your cheek. You didn’t let yourself blush, remembering that it was all for show, and you pulled up a Word document on your laptop.

“Okay, so, this is going to be our contract,” you said, preparing yourself for his teasing.

“We have a contract? This isn’t Suits, man. It’s a fake relationship. We don’t need a contract!” 

“Uh, we so do need a contract, Higgins! We need to draw boundaries and limits and we need to stick to them.”

 He rolled his eyes and moved a little nearer to you on the bench, so that he could see your laptop screen.

 “Wow, nothing like a list of comprehensive rules and guidelines to really bring the romance, huh?”

 “Fake-romance,” you corrected him.

 “Yeah, yeah, whatever. So, what’s first on the contract?”

 “Okay, first up, no kissing.”

 He spluttered comically for a bit.

 “No kissing? How are we supposed to convince anyone that we’re dating if we can’t kiss?”

 “Look, plenty of couples avoid PDA. We can still, like, link pinkies or whatever.”

 “Link pinkies? Wha-? Are you living in the 80s? This isn’t Grease, babe.”

 “Look, Race, physical stuff may not mean anything to you, but it’s important to me, okay?”

 “Whoever said physical stuff didn’t matter to me?”, he muttered under his breath. But, after a moment he sighed. “Fiine, put it on the contract.

 You typed it up and looked expectantly at him.

“Okay, you get no kissing, but, number two, you have to hang out with me and my friends at lunch and come to parties with me.”

“Technically, that’s two and three. And, I get parties, but why lunch?”

He stared at the ground.

“Spot always sat with us at lunch, so he’d definitely notice if you were with me and the guys.”

“Fair enough.”

You typed that, and then said, “Also, we cannot tell anyone that this is fake. Gossip spreads like wildfire at this school so nobody can know that this isn’t a real relationship. Not even Albert, or your track team buddies.”

“Obviously. And don’t act like I can’t keep secrets. You can’t tell Davey or Katherine. I had journalism with her last year and I’m pretty sure that she would disapprove of this plan.”

He was right, of course he was.

“Fine, deal. Anything else?”

“Oh! You have to come with me on the ski trip trip in December,” he said triumphantly.

Your high school’s annual ski trip was infamous for being the weekend when most of your school lost their virginity. Some schools had the night after prom, but your school had two days and a night spent in the mountains.

“The ski trip? As in the one just before Christmas break? We’d have to stay together for three months to go on that.”

“Listen, no one in a relationship would ever let their boyfriend go on that trip alone. And, if we’ve gotta keep up until then, then so be it. Spot will definitely be there, so he’ll notice if I’m with someone else. We can break up after the trip, no harm, no foul.”

“Okay, fine. But we will not be sharing a room.”

“Yeah, obviously.”

“Anything else you want me to add, oh wise one?” you asked.

“Uh, well, there is this one thing,” he said, sounding a little hesitant. You motioned for him to go on. “Well, Spot always thought it would be cute if I wrote him little letters and put them in his locker or gave them to him, or whatever, and I never did it. Um, if he saw me giving those to you, he’d probably get pretty jealous.”

“Badass Spot Conlon, who would beat up anyone who looked at him wrong wanted love letters? That’s so cute!”

“Yeah, there’s a lot more to him than just being angry and bitchy. I bet he’s got his college boyfriend writing him all sorts of letters now,” Race scoffed.

“He left you for a college guy? That’s rough, Race. I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, its whatever,” Race quickly said. “So, that’s the contract, then?”

“Yeah,” you said, satisfied.

“Perfect,” he grinned, and his blue eyes were twinkling again.

“You do know that you missed the bus today, right?” he said, after a moment.

“Uh, yeah, I was just gonna walk home.”

“Holy shit, what is it with you and walking? Do you not have your license?”

“Uh, I do. But driving terrifies me and I’d probably end up killing someone – or myself – if I drove every day. But, yeah, I don’t mind walking.”

“Well, if you’re dating me, there will be no walking. I’ll give you a lift home and a ride to school in the morning, if you want one.”

“Are you serious? You don’t need to do that, Race.”

“Nah, I want to. What kind of fake-boyfriend would I be if I didn’t?”

He smiled at you and you realised that Race had been right the day before. You could do worse. As far as fake high school boyfriends went, Race was probably one of the best options you had.

“I’d appreciate that. Thanks, Higgins.”

“No biggie. Now, let’s go. The Bachelorette is on tonight and I need to see who Becca chooses.”

Before long, Race had dropped you off at home, with a cheeky wink and promise to text. As soon as you were inside, your phone lit up with a message from him.

see ya bright and early tomorrow morning, girlfriend ;)

You rolled your eyes and typed a quick reply. Then, you went to contacts and your hand hovered over Katherine’s name. You’d have to tell her what had happened with Jack and explain that you were now (somehow) dating Race Higgins.

The phone rang twice, and you could practically hear the smile in her voice when she greeted you, as bright and cheerful as ever. You talked for a little bit about school and she told you about college and you realised that you probably couldn’t put it off for any longer. As soon as you said that you had something to tell her, she sounded more than a little worried.

“What’s up? Is everything okay?”

“This story is going to sound pretty weird but hear me out. You know when I was little, I used to write those letters to myself?”

“Yeah, you said that your mom told you to do it if you ever needed help figuring out your feelings.”

“Yeah, well, not all of the letters were to myself. I wrote some to guys I had crushes on and I swear that I never sent any of them out, but, um, somehow, some of those guys, got their letters?”

“Oh, shit. That sounds stressful. Who’d you write to?”

“That’s the thing that I need to tell you… When you first got with Jack, I thought that I was into him and I wrote him a letter. I was never going to send and I’m pretty sure I didn’t actually have feelings for him, I was just a little torn up because it felt like I was losing my best friend to my sister. But, uh, he got the letter. And, I figured that I should tell you before you heard it from someone else. And, also, uh, Race Higgins and I are dating.” The last sentence slipped out so quickly that you hoped she had missed it.

She was silent for a long time and you were worried that the phone might have died while you were talking and then, you heard a sigh.

“That is… a lot. I’m not going to lie, I am pretty pissed off right now. I don’t care if you were into Jack or not. You wrote a love letter to my boyfriend, while I was dating him. And Race Higgins? Like Spot’s Race Higgins? What the fuck? Look, I’ve got a report due tomorrow, and I really don’t need to be stressed right now, so we can just talk about this some other time.”

She was definitely mad.

“Kath, I-I’m so sorry, I didn’t want to hurt you, I swear.”

“It’s fine. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

She hung up. It was not fine. You felt like crying and crumpling yourself into a ball, when your phone pinged with a notification from Instagram.

@racehiggins tagged you in a post.

It was some stupid meme, and you knew he’d only tagged you in it because people from school would see it, but it brought a smile to your face, anyway.

Race was getting pretty good at making you smile, and you hadn’t even been fake-dating for a week. Maybe, this would all work out well.

TAGLIST: @hungoverhellhound @seriously-ceci @the-butterfly-anon @ben-cook-can-cook @pinecovewoods @brendonuriehimself

[wishfulwonderer]

Reunited

So there isn’t much to theorize right now, at least not enough for a full Consider the Following. So I decided that I might as well show you something to pass the time, especially with a possible hiatus on the horizon.

So here is a bunch of shots I preferred from “Reunited”.

WARNING! THIS IS SPOILER HEAVY WARNING FOR “REUNITED”! ———————– ———————– ———————– ———————– SPOILERY SPEELERS SPOILS! You were warned! ———————– ———————– ———————– ———————–

Now just look how cute this bunch is here with all their fancy dress up clothes all coming out to support their two friends that also make a third friend and THAT’S SO CUUUUUTE!

JUST LOOK AT UM!

Me for most of this wedding...

Now that is a style I can get behind, look at just the synced up design in their fusion clothes!

Not sure what Ronaldo is saying here, but Bismuth’s face is either one of confusion at his stupidity or confusion at how he knows so much about armor craft.

I mean who knows right? Ronaldo might actually know his stuff... Nah...

And Then here comes the friggin Diamonds to crash the party, gotta go smashing the place up thinking that disturbing the cluster will just end this fight but NOPE.

BAM!

HERE COMES CLUSTER TO THROW YOU INTO THE WORST HURTLOCKER OF YO LIFE! GIVE YOU THE OLD RAZZLE DAZZLE!

LAAAAAAAAPIIIIIIIIIIS! Yes I dislike what you did before, but your character growth has been good and I did miss you. And what an entrance! Girl was made for the dramatic.

AGRICULTURE RAINS FROM ABOVE!

JUUUUST LOOOOK AAAAT THEEEEEEEEM! YOU’RE ALL DORKS AND WE LOVE YOU!

I’ve felt worse... Than like six thousand years of grieving a close family member?

GOOD GREEN GREMLINS! LAPIS WHAT HAPPENED IN THAT MIRROR?

They are, in fact, the Crystal Gems. Battle stances and all.

Cluster Bro is good to go.

PERIDOT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

So here is where I’d like to state rather than screencap the beautiful scenes leading up to Steven talking the Diamonds down, cause like holy crap. There is no one shot or reasonable number of shots I could have taken that would fit on this post.

High notes are how his barely passing through all of them fills them with the weight if his whole heart. They change so drastically when he’s around and even the slightest touch gives them so much hope.

And then seeing the impact of that on the Diamonds! His heart is so powerful it stops the diamonds dead in their tracks. These scenes, in short order and along with examining Blue Diamond’s powers, explain why he’s so lovable to everyone around him. He exudes an aura of his pure love for everyone and everything he meets!

And then HIS AURA EXPLODES AT THE END LIKE BLUE’S LAMENT BUT INSTEAD WITH ALL THE LOVE IN HIS HEART!

AND NOW WE HAVE THE TURNING POINT! THE FUTURE IS NOOOOOW!

And now we have to wait for the hiatus to be over... ;~;

And with some fan cohesion and a lot of memes, we’ll get there. The long dark cometh, and we must stand as one to reach its zenith!

[ayekanaru]

SHIPPING INFO.       Answer the following for your muse(s) so people       know how shipping works on your blog. REPOST.       Don’t reblog.

WHAT’S YOUR OTP FOR YOUR MUSE?:

#IDontKnow2k17

I mean...not Yosho and Ayeka, for sure. Ew. *Michael Jordan voice* Stop it. Get Some Help.

if you want romantic otps, I guess it’s Ayeka/Ryoko/Tenchi and even then, as I’ve mentioned before, I don’t go nuts for it. It’s just the ship that makes more sense for me. I don’t go nuts for the more popular Ryoko/Tenchi and yet that also makes much more sense than Ayeka/Tenchi -- I think because I see the latter as working better as friends. Ayeka has had such bad luck with romance, I’m just happy somebody who isn’t her direct family LIKES her XD

For the maybefriendsotp-but-we’re-not-really-sure-category, I like the dynamic between Ayeka and Mihoshi. Partly thanks to the lovely @mihoshi-kuramitsu since it’s through our threads that I was able to think deeply about these two, and how Ayeka thinks about Mihoshi. From the OVA we got a glimpse that maybe Ayeka respected her/her reputation/her title as Galaxy Police officer, until she started living with her XD But at the same time, in lots of domestic things, Ayeka never fails to be next to Mihoshi and I like to think it’s through that that Ayeka begins to understand -- or at the very least, see where Mihoshi’s coming from. 

At the same time, lookit episode 7. Their Episode 7 interaction never fails to make me laugh and also cringe a little now as an adult. Ayeka is MEAN when she’s in extreme rival mode. Mean mean MEAN. Poor Mihoshi!

SASAMI AND AYEKA, BEST SISTERS 4EVAH. Urd, Belldandy and Skuld who?

FOR FRIENDOTPS THOUGH -- this is a recent one comparatively, but I love the idea of Umi from Magic Knight Rayearth and Ayeka hanging out. I feel like they’d get together so well, since they’re both from rich families yet pretty subdued in their personal selves. They have quiet chats, or sometimes are just content to be next to each other in their worlds. Oh! And Ayeka could teach Umi how to sew (Umi hates sewing), while Umi can teach Ayeka how to bake (Umi’s an expert baker!) I HAVE LOTS OF OTHER HEADCANONS, I’D JUST HAVE TO REMEMBER THEM AND ALSO THEY’RE CONTEXT/SITUATION-BASED. (Umi would be the tag team partner with Ayeka while fighting. FRIENDLY BANTER ENSUES ♥)

And for a little blog crossover -- ironicaly enough, I think Skuld and Ayeka would be more acquaintances than friends. Ayeka may treat her like the kid that Skuld doesn’t want to be treated as (seeing her like she sees Sasami), and Skuld may see Ayeka as a classy lady, someone like Belldandy, someone to look up to...until she sees Ayeka and Ryoko XD. deja vu, yo. 

I also think Ayeka and Skuld would not interact a lot? Like. They’d be quiet together, to the point of not wanting to get together. (Or get angry and destroy the universe, both have some tempers!) IDK,  their relationship may mirror how Ayeka feels about Washu? Blah.

(For the record, I see Ayeka and Belldandy getting along swimmingly.)

And then there’s some people from ZOIDS too, but I’ll leave that for later because apparently I can crossover two or five series with ZOIDS. Jeebus I have a problem.

WHAT ARE YOU WILLING TO RP WHEN IT COMES TO SHIPPING?:

Anything so long as it’s not incest*, torture porn, pedophilia and look, just pick up your local doujinshi with Ayeka in it, especially as the submissive, innocent type, and anything in there is off-limits, there you go. (Weeps for humanity.)

*And considering the incest mess Tenchi Muyo! has, this gets complicated. I recognize and know why Ayeka loved her brother as both brother and man, but I also know that Yosho didn’t want her that way thank Tsunami, and their families created their engagement for political reasons. Not good reasons, but it is what it is. I’m not up for any incest of any kind, either way and Tenchi's case is a hullabaloo, hoo-boy, but yeah

HOW LARGE DOES THE AGE GAP HAVE TO BE TO MAKE IT UNCOMFORTABLE?:

If romantic: I’d rest easier if both muses were 18+, but if there’s like…a 40 yr-gap and both are human –unlike say, everyone on Jurai who are millennia old and some random person from Earth– I’mma just close the ‘X’ and back away. (My parents have a 22 yr-old gap, I know what I’m saying.)

Other than that, *shrugs*

ARE YOU SELECTIVE WHEN SHIPPING?:

Based on personal roleplay experience, yep-a-roonie. Also, some of the questions below answer why, besides the fact that I’m choosy as heck. More so with Ayeka, because she doesn’t seem to ‘search’ for love, if you know what I mean. 

HOW FAR DO STEAMY MOMENTS HAVE TO GO BEFORE THEY’RE CONSIDERED NSFW?:

Once it gets into groping territory and some clothes are startin’ to be shuffled. I don’t rp smut on here at all. just because it’s extremely uncomfortable,

WHO ARE OTHER MUSES YOU SHIP YOUR MUSE WITH?: 

Didn’t you ask me this in the first question? Go up there and read again, yo.

…Unless you meant on Tumblr…in which case…

(Most of these are as friends, because i’m a boob. If you’re not on here I JUST FORGOT I SWEAR)

As I said above, I love how Mihoshi and Ayeka have gotten enough development thanks to @mihoshi-kuramitsu. Same goes for @asktenchi -- it’s refreshing to see Tenchi written almost the same way as he is in the Okuda manga, only with more memes sass and “oh god why am I even here why do I do these things????” Tenchi feels real, man. I like that the dynamic between Ayeka and Tenchi gets explored because YEAH they need it.

I love how all the active Ryokos can get something out of Ayeka. The quiet chill and quick liners from @galacticdemon -- the sparse canon and domestic from @spacepirate-ryoko -- and the balls off the wall insanity that is @bringerofdxmons -- they’re all so great and I love that I can have Ayeka reflect on aspects of Ryoko with them <3

I like the banter and general interaction with Nappa! @nappainanotherdimensionI think it’s pretty cool that Ayeka gets to interact with another alien, as it were, who’s not from the Masaki household, and who actually forces her to rethink things. To top it off, his thoughts and (for her, out of the blue) occasional words of support surprise her. Think of it this way: you know what your family thinks about you, so you might not care as much -- but when a friend tells you things, you feel like you exist.

Dandy and Ayeka are best pop-duo 100/10 @pyoniumyankee I gotta get back to our threads, but Ayeka’s learning to keep up with Dandy, let’s just say! 

@invenina never fails to have her muses be fast friends with mine IT’S AN AMAZING ABILITY. Though with Carmilla, Ayeka’s starting to feel more like “the friend that wishes she wasn’t a friend, but would probably still get a froyo* with you.” Ayeka sees Carmilla as a young upstart (haha young geddit) who’s rough but at least is better than Ryoko in the sense that she's not a pathological liar and someone who’s trying. She’s got a young nation-state in Madripoor, Ayeka sorta gets it. 

*I have no idea if froyos are still a thing. I have never tasted one either.

@yunhuntress‘s Fang and Ayeka are so great and full of feels together, that Kat already made a verse for us. It’s such a weird relationship because they’re definitely friends --Ayeka cares for Fang and appreciates her a lot, especially her insights. But there’s also a feeling of...”ARE THEY?????” or is that just me I certainly didn’t mean for it to turn out that way, but who’s complaining, idk mang, you? 

DOES ONE HAVE TO ASK TO SHIP WITH YOU?:

Yes. Because a) I’d like to know and b) I’m an idiot, I don’t know when’s someone’s interested or not.

HOW OFTEN DO YOU LIKE TO SHIP?:

Not a lot, really…I like thinking about ships, if I have them, and theorizing a lot. But never put anything into play, and if I draw them, I either doodle stuff like here or…don’t draw them at all. The latter is what usually happens, haha. I’m poopy at drawing cute stuff too, so.

ARE YOU MULTISHIP?:

NAH, SON. It’s an unpopular stance on Tumblr, more so nowadays, but I’m singleship! I’d say why but again, pretty unpopular, so bleh. (I mean…at some point, if something drastic happens, I might change to multiship, but I have a good reason for my stance.)

ON AYEKA HOWEVER, it’s different because she actually has a canon future polyamorous/polygamous marriage! And it’s one that absolutely makes sense out of most anime I’ve seen, haha. So that’s why here I’m singleship, but multiship if polyamory’s involved. AKA if it’s at the same time in one universe, not an AU or anything like that.

ARE YOU SHIP OBSESSED OR SHIP MORE-OR-LESS?:

Um…neither…it depends..?

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SHIP IN YOUR CURRENT FANDOM?:

#NumberOneFanofKazukiAmameClub

please. lookit them. She basically decides to teach him Juraian martial arts after calling his butt out for not carrying a gun to protect himself (aren’t you, like, a police officer????) and then they fall in love and listen, just based on this pure image alone, and the Masaki men having a Thing for strong women, that this is where it all started...

Also, I love that Seto had a deep relationship with Mikami, and something happened where they basically just separated and then Seto got married to Utsusumi. Like. We had canon lesbians/bi before the polygamy angle. This explains why Seto talks so much to Mikami! And Seto’s harem, I guess....? Now if only Kajishima showed us instead of his shota crap,it would be better! GIVE US THEIR ADVENTURES, THEY PROBABLY PRANKED EVERYONE ON JURAI.

FINALLY, HOW DOES ONE SHIP WITH YOU? :

I guess just ask? I prefer to write enough with someone where I know that our muses know each other well enough, that I could see it happening!

TAGGED BY.

One Gigamillion Years Ago by @nappainanotherdimension

TAGGING. @mihoshi-kuramitsu @yunhuntress @cantusecho @galacticdemon @spacepirate-ryoko @bringerofdxmons @pyoniumyankee @rosabrida @spiritxgun @sammyadorable @personategod @extravachance @reilapsed @invenina @discguise @devilslcg @asktenchi @way-of-flowers

[swyllh]

svt vocal team: radio host scenarios

radio host au – vocal team edition!

where you’re either a) called in as a temporary replacement, or b) are a permanent host for a late night show.

seungkwan:

buCKLE UP BUDDIES

ok so, the radio show is split into different shifts – day and night shifts, mainly

you take the night shift, because you’re an incorrigible night owl

and because you love chillhop, acoustics. it’s like a match made in heaven, you and night shifts.

you know there’s a radio host, a very popular radio host, for the morning shift – he’s your exact counterpart in that he’s perfect for the morning call: bubbly, loves singing, has a lovely cheerful voice… the list goes on

but because you’re always on the night shift, and you’re always sleeping in, you don’t get to meet this guy, much less listen to his shows.

so you’re like /shrug/

but inside you’re really curious, because… well, you’re always by yourself recording (since you know how to operate almost everything on your own, and all your friends are losers who need their 9 hours of rest)

this one time, however…

you find yourself stuck in the studio patching up some things way after your shift

there was an emotionally attached caller who took up one hour, the sound system went down a bit and you had to fix it while keeping the listeners entertained…

things dragged on until it was, like, five in the morning.

you’re ready to drag your ass off to bed, when the morning radio host enters with a steaming cup of coffee and a bright smile

he doesn’t expect to see you there – usually the studio just runs on autoplay between the hours of 3am – 5.30am

“hey…” “hey, sorry, but i’ve been here since 8pm last night and i need to sleep bye” is what you say before you just collapse on the sofa in the next room.

seungkwan is obviously at a loss but!! he’s also been curious about the night host

when you wake up, seungkwan’s in the recording room working his charm

in fact, you wake up to the sound of his singing. nice, non-belty singing.

there’s a cup of coffee on the table next to you, and it just says “for the overworked night host !! :D”

you thank your past life and good karma and everything and drink the coffee.

“hey, i’m seungkwan, the morning host. it’s nice to meet you for the first time!” he says when he leaves the studio on autoplay.

you laugh and introduce yourself too. but you have classes and you need to change, so the exchange is pretty short.

but! you do leave notes at the recording station for each other after that haha

one time you laugh out loud at the sight of what he’s left for you, and explain to the listeners the whole deal between you and seungkwan

someone demands a collab

a few, ten, maybe fifty people support the idea

so you and seungkwan end up doing an evening special and by the end of it it’s like the best idea ever because he’s so funny??? what???

the notes never stop coming, man

 jeonghan:

i don’t think he listens much to radio shows, much less late night ones, but he does tune in this one time

and you’re in the middle of giving out some advice

it could be anything, literally, like how many seconds to politely laugh at a bad joke

but you’re saying it so gently and soothingly that he actually listens

“so yes, i would think that the bare minimum would be two or three ‘ha’s, just so you can make a quick transition. remember to keep smiling for a second or two after the other person stops speaking, and then you can move on from there! :)”

how do you even enunciate a smiley face

he doesn’t know

but you do :)

and he finds it kind of funny and calming so!! he continues tuning in!

m a y b e once he actually calls

“so, um what do you think about brainwashing people for their love?”

and you’re just O.o but you’re cool

not the weirdest question you’ve heard

(just before his call you got one asking you about how to deal with being robbed of your remote control)

so you talk about it with him on the radio, and he’s enamoured!

what a nice voice! what an understanding character!

“don’t you think we should make sure our loved ones know that they’re loved?” “yes, mr yoon, but brainwashing…”

calls regularly after that, if only to brainwash you into being his dearest radio host

“and whose radio host are you, [y/n]?” “… i’m not saying that on broadcast, buddy” “oHOhOHoho so you’ll say it off broadcast?”

literally you slam your head into the desk

“WHACK” “… [y/n], are you okay?”

your listeners are tired of your banter man (they love it though)

joshua:

ok so the thing is, you’ve just been called in to do this as a favour

you are in  n o  w a y a professional

p sure you flunked public speaking class one time because you were laughing too hard at your own joke

so when you’re doing this show, you’re just uttering disclaimers

“so let’s talk about the newly minted water cooler at the admin block… that is, if it’s a relevant topic. is it relevant? shit, i don’t know. shit, i’m not supposed to curse on the show. shit i did it. shit i did it again.”

it’s kind of a trainwreck

you’re kind of like, if comic sans could talk… yeah.

so when the show ends – you’re in the midst of talking about the conspiracy theory between the moon landing and that ‘that boi’ meme

the end-card (?) song plays and your mic is switched off mid-sentence

josh can’t believe he just sat there and listened through this trainwreck

but he did

(and maybe he’s partially convinced of your theory)

he tunes in the next time, same time, same day, but you’re not there

he’s not sure why he’s disappointed, but at least he’ll get his regularly scheduled content of actual campus news

surprisingly you get called in again – and he’s tuned in

“back by popular demand!” you end up yelling, and his eardrums haven’t been quite the same since.

“ok, no, but seriously, some of you guys wanted me back? haha”

so maaaaybe he might have actually called in to ask about you

and you know about that, so after that broadcast, you get his number from the regular host, and start exchanging conspiracy theories lol

 jihoon: (happy birthday!)

ok so this one is a bit different.

because he’s a music producer, and he’s trying to get his work out there

testing the waters, yknow

and you’re part of the campus radio team, so he arranges to meet up with you

not before marathoning your podcasts so he can um strategically win you over to play his music? i mean, pssh, have you heard the stuff he mixes? he doesn’t need that, but it’s better to know who you’re working with anyway

so he listens, and you’ve got this inviting, friendly voice that really makes people feel like they’re having a conversation with you

SO he marathons, and finds that you’re a pretty chill person and open minded

nice

when you two meet, he’s just finishing up his remix in the café

you walk in, and see him hard at work! wow, what a man

“hey, it’s [y/n] from the campus connection. you must be jihoon?”

turns out, wow, who’d have expected it, you can tell he’s got talent. it’s good. like, really, really good

so you sell his deal to the overall producer of your radio team. works well, the show ratings are hitting an all-time high

and you guys decide to do a mini-interview

“think of the ratings,” your overall producer whispers, hunched over a plan to monetise this tiny radio show

“hello everyone! it’s [y/n] here, and guess who i have with me today? it’s lee jihoon, the producer behind the music you’ve been listening to!”

“so, jihoon, tell us more about yourself!”

his first impression of you was right – is right – you’re really easy to talk to, and the session goes by quite comfortably

he doesn’t even realise time’s up until your overall producer is literally banging on the door and mouthing “out”

“that was really fun, jihoon, thank you!” “nah, it was really easy to talk to you”

do you guys hang out and he brings you more compositions to evaluate?

:)

 seokmin:

okay, this time seokmin is the one calling you in for help

one of his friends (this guy has a ton of friends, don’t even.) mans the radio show, and is in need of a replacement for the night shift

“why don’t you help him out, seokmin?” “have you heard me speak?” “uhuh” “it’s the night show, [y/n]. i’m going to wake people up” “…so you’re saying that i make people want to sleep?” “uhhhhhhhhhhhh no?”

but you help him out anyway – that guy is impossible to refuse

so! seokmin accompanies you to the studio, and he’s just there for moral support because it can be scary doing a radio show for two hours or so

“um, hi, everyone, this is [y/n] and i’m filling in for the regular host!” /muffled whispering in the background

everyone. can hear. seokmin. being encouraging. in the background.

at first, it’s kind of sweet?

but like, after the fiftieth thumbs up you’re just like

“ok seokmin, how about you join us in the recording”

“whaaaa- nooooooooooooo hi everyone, i’m seokmin hahaha”

he is a good night show host, despite what he says

he’s funny, and his sense of humour can be pretty chill when he wills it to. it takes a bit of effort, though, because at first he’s really loud

“so, seokmin, tell us more about that time with the-” “we dON’T SPEAK OF-” “shhhhh”

but yeah, night shift is so fun with him, you forget about the thermos of coffee you brought to keep you awake.

eventually the two of you do get into a somewhat philosophical discussion

“how did we get from cabbages to being happy?” “uh”

and even though he’s pretty happy-go-lucky and always sparkling with happiness, you guys exchange views and you find that it’s not always the case

i mean, duh, but still

“but i think it’s best to try and be happy, yknow” “…yeah, it is”

it’s a pretty meaningful conversation, and part of you is in shock that this didn’t happen in more private circumstances, but that there are at least fifty people listening in haha

you do get to know him a bit better after this, though

and he treats you to coffee the next day for your efforts, so it’s all worth it!

[r0rorowurboat]

All of them!

200: My crush’s name is: n/a lmao199: I was born in: naples, fl198: I am really: gay?? idk197: My cellphone company is: t mobile196: My eye color is: green/blue/gray/idk man195: My shoe size is: 7 1/2 8 sometimes194: My ring size is: um i think that was 7 too but i dont remember193: My height is: 5′4″192: I am allergic to:pineapples and penicillin191: My 1st car was: a v old red saturn190: My 1st job was: a waitress189: Last book you read: um i think it was uhhhhhh shit uhhhh god fuck it was the warrior cats book but!!! it was bc i was stuck at my sister house with nothing but bibles or that series to read188: My bed is: an air mattress atm187: My pet: is perfect and i love her her name is luna and shes a little black cat who loves cuddles and kisses186: My best friend:is wonderful and i love him185: My favorite shampoo is: uhm. error i hardly ever use shampoo bc i have v dry curly hair and it makes it horrible184: Xbox or ps3: pc boi183: Piggy banks are: cure182: In my pockets: they dont make pockets in womens fashion wtf are you on. but uh. usually my phone, wallet, and keys181: On my calendar: i.. dont.. have one. 180: Marriage is: alright i guess. tax benefits179: Spongebob can: do that annoying laugh 178: My mom: tries v hard177: The last three songs I bought were? *squints* i think... it was keshas new album?176: Last YouTube video watched: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CQuR8LVKhUE175: How many cousins do you have? 2174: Do you have any siblings? yes i have 3 older sisters173: Are your parents divorced? yeup172: Are you taller than your mom? nope171: Do you play an instrument? not anymore but i used to play clarinet170: What did you do yesterday? uhm spent the day at home as usual[ I Believe In ]169: Love at first sight: nah man168: Luck: to an extent i guess?167: Fate: i dont think so. 166: Yourself: sometimes165: Aliens: yes164: Heaven: nah163: Hell: nah162: God: nah161: Horoscopes: yes160: Soul mates: nah159: Ghosts: hmmm probably158: Gay Marriage: yes!157: War: no156: Orbs: orbs?? what are those?? like in ghost hunter shows? bc if so then no155: Magic: hm. what type? i think theres stuff we dont know about but idk if id call it magic. I think certain things have more power than we give credit. idk its hard to explain.[ This or That ]154: Hugs or Kisses: hugs153: Drunk or High: drunk152: Phone or Online: online151: Red heads or Black haired: redheadsredheadsredheads150: Blondes or Brunettes: hmmmm blondes i guess?149: Hot or cold: cold148: Summer or winter: winter147: Autumn or Spring: autumn146: Chocolate or vanilla: chocolate145: Night or Day: night144: Oranges or Apples: hmmm oranges143: Curly or Straight hair: curly 142: McDonalds or Burger King: mcdonalds141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: milk chocolate140: Mac or PC: pc139: Flip flops or high heals: usually sneakers tbh but uhhh i own more heels then flip flops138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: hm i mean i guess sweet and poor? im already poor so137: Coke or Pepsi: i dont drink soda, water. or coffee136: Hillary or Obama: obama135: Burried or cremated: cremated134: Singing or Dancing: singing133: Coach or Chanel: um. walmart? 132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: who or who?131: Small town or Big city: hm idk. probably city? 130: Wal-Mart or Target: target129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: neither pls128: Manicure or Pedicure: hmmm manicure probs.127: East Coast or West Coast: i live on the east coast but idk west coast is home to a lot of friends so hmmmm126: Your Birthday or Christmas: its like a week apart there isnt much difference125: Chocolate or Flowers: chocolate124: Disney or Six Flags: disney123: Yankees or Red Sox: i dont sports[ Here’s What I Think About ]122: War: icky121: George Bush: memes?120: Gay Marriage: im gay119: The presidential election: my vote didnt matter!118: Abortion: its your body your choice117: MySpace: never had one116: Reality TV: i mean, its fake? entertaining tho115: Parents: eh. 114: Back stabbers: icky113: Ebay: cheap stuff112: Facebook: only for family tbh111: Work: pays the bills110: My Neighbors: dont know them109: Gas Prices: expensive108: Designer Clothes: overpriced107: College: wish i could afford it!106: Sports: nah105: My family: haha104: The future: haha[ Last time I ]103: Hugged someone: my grandma a few days ago102: Last time you ate: pizza a few hours ago101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: moving day seeing my extended family again100: Cried in front of someone: the other night with my mom or uhhh in call with kina today actually99: Went to a movie theater: wow uh pretty long time ago i dont actually remember98: Took a vacation: haha idk man97: Swam in a pool: wow uh idk96: Changed a diaper: hm last time i was with the twins. not sure how long its been. maybe 2 or 3 months?95: Got my nails done: when did my sister get married? years ago idk94: Went to a wedding: ^^93: Broke a bone: never have92: Got a peircing: about a year ago91: Broke the law: heh uh 90: Texted: a few hours ago[ MISC ]89: Who makes you laugh the most: probably kina or riley rn88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: my mom tbh. the kids. wyatt. 87: The last movie I saw: the orphan86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: hm idk getting a job i guess85: The thing im not looking forward to: getting a job lmao84: People call me: by my name. but i have nicknames now!! Ray, rachi, babe, ray baby... its very nice and makes me feel warm and fuzzy and loved83: The most difficult thing to do is: hmmm clean? be honest about things that are bothering me? idk82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: never81: My zodiac sign is: capricorn sun aquarius moon80: The first person i talked to today was: the gc i think?79: First time you had a crush: i was v young and they had freckles and red hair and i died78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: um i try not to hide things in general! but someone who will call me out recently is raiken and archie lmao77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: riley lmao tho i beat her to it 

76: Right now I am talking to: riley75: What are you going to do when you grow up: i am grown up technically. uh. hopefully be an animator74: I have/will get a job: as a cashier probably73: Tomorrow: i have a job interview and then im gonna get coffee72: Today: was a long day71: Next Summer: hmmm idk70: Next Weekend: IDK GOD69: I have these pets: a cat!! who i love!!! and already gushed about but shes laying on my lap and purring rn and its so soothing68: The worst sound in the world: scratching against those uhhhh holographic things???? god i hate it67: The person that makes me cry the most is: hmnn my dad haha66: People that make you happy: my friends!!! Kina, Ali, Archie, Riley, Leo, Raiken, Mimi...... all of them good pals the squad my faves i love them65: Last time I cried: today rip64: My friends are: GOOD AND AMAZING I LOVE THEM63: My computer is: big! and i like it62: My School: none61: My Car: ded from the hurricane rip me60: I lose all respect for people who: are shitty? idk. 59: The movie I cried at was: hmmmm idk movies dont usually make me cry58: Your hair color is: uhm it was really dark blue but as the color has faded it kind of looks black/brown now57: TV shows you watch: a lot of them56: Favorite web site: uh i guess tumblr55: Your dream vacation: not being here!! probably just going around visiting everyone and hanging out having a good time54: The worst pain I was ever in was: tearing a ligament in my knee it hurt a lot53: How do you like your steak cooked: medium 52: My room is: messy51: My favorite celebrity is: ummm idk50: Where would you like to be: home tbh49: Do you want children: idk48: Ever been in love: ye47: Who’s your best friend: hhhhhhhhhhhh raiken46: More guy friends or girl friends: girls and nb babes45: One thing that makes you feel great is: just hanging out with people tbh44: One person that you wish you could see right now: i guess that would be my mom haha43: Do you have a 5 year plan: i did once. idk what happened to it haha i guess things never really go according to plan and it just hurts more to make one. just set goals, not plans.42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: i did once but i dont think i have the same values as i did when i made that41: Have you pre-named your children: i used to but idk if i want kids anymore40: Last person I got mad at: ummmm hmm 39: I would like to move to: hmm somewhere with 4 seasons not just summer and less hot summer38: I wish I was a professional: artist[ My Favorites ]37: Candy: kit-kats36: Vehicle: um idk small ones i guess35: President: obama? idk34: State visited: ooohhh michigan33: Cellphone provider: ive only ever had the one so idk32: Athlete: uh31: Actor: uh30: Actress: uh29: Singer: hmmmmmmmm rn i would have to say Bea Miller but check back with me in a week28: Band: The Silent Comedy27: Clothing store: hmmmm cotton on has really comfy clothes26: Grocery store: target or publix25: TV show: rn? bnha24: Movie: hhhhhh um idk uhhhhh moulin rouge i guess? it used to be my fav but idk anymore23: Website: tumblr22: Animal: elephants21: Theme park: epcot20: Holiday: halloween19: Sport to watch: none18: Sport to play: none17: Magazine: none16: Book: hmmmmm A Monster Calls15: Day of the week: none14: Beach: hh13: Concert attended: never been12: Thing to cook: uh i guess eggs11: Food: sushi10: Restaurant: its a really good sushi place with bubble tea and thai donuts that i dont remember the name of9: Radio station: hhh idk8: Yankee candle scent: idk7: Perfume: i dont really like perfume it gives me headaches6: Flower: ooooh gardenia5: Color: blue/green teal4: Talk show host: john oliver3: Comedian: hh2: Dog breed: hmmm husky? also labradors and uhhh all dogs tbh ohhh pitbulls and rottweilers i love dogs good yes1: Did you answer all these truthfully? ye mostly

[evenstevensranked]

#27: Season 2, Episode 1 - “Starstruck”

Ruby desperately wants to win a radio contest to sit in on boyband BBMak’s recording session. Meanwhile, Louis finds an incredibly lucky penny and milks it for all it’s worth.

Wow, guys! Season 2 opens with the BBMak/Lucky Penny/Louis gets a makeover and looks smokin’ hot and Ruby develops a crush on him and I'm like "girl, same" episode!!! Let’s do this.

Alright, so within the first minute of this episode we learn that Ruby is absolutely obsessed with BBMak (a boyband that actually existed and is now unfortunately so irrelevant that some younger viewers of today assume they're a fictional band) and she’s trying to win a contest to go to their recording session when they come to Sacramento. She’s been listening to the radio on her pink, cheetah print walkman for hours on end trying to make sure she’s the lucky caller. Ren is concerned that her intense devotion may not be healthy.. but, Ruby insists she’s not obsessed with them. Her bedroom and behavior says otherwise: 

At school the next day, Louis ends up finding a lucky penny which leads him to experience the best few days in a row ever. It kicks off with him narrowly escaping death and his big history test being canceled due to their teacher’s monkey having babies. The usual. If you binge watch the show, like I’ve done more times than I care to admit, the first few seconds of this scene are shocking because Louis' voice is obviously deeper and he looks obviously older. Yet according to Disney logic we're supposed to believe he's still in 7th grade, lol nah. Maybe at least the second half of 7th grade... We've gone over this before.

Louis seconds away from potentially dying over a penny.

Like I've mentioned, Disney is notoriously bad at airing episodes out of order. So here, we get an episode featuring Ren’s old friend Nelson. The only issue is that this aired 6 episodes before Thin Ice, which is Nelson’s formal introduction. The only explanation I can think of for this is that the Disney execs thought the BBMak thing would make a stronger season opener and switched up the airing order after they were already shot sequentially. I guess they assumed, or hoped, no one would notice or care that there's a new character we've never seen before just chilling with the gang like BFFs lol. According to Wiki at least, Season 2 was aired horrifically out of order when you compare the production code to the number it aired in the season. Like, WOW. For example, this episode was shot as Episode 13. I think that says it all.

No wonder Louis seems so jarringly older in this episode. He’s totally younger in the episodes that were supposed to air during the front half of S2.

Anyway, both Ren and Nelson are concerned about Ruby’s wellbeing now. She has practically turned into a fanatic zombie. They approach her and she says “I haven’t slept. I haven’t eaten. Do you really think I wanna chat?” completely zoned out of her mind. Yeah, I’d be worried too. We also see that she’s not doing her schoolwork either. Her entire binder is full of BBMak, including this rather disturbing pop-up: 

Continuing his string of good luck, Louis gets to eat Principal Wexler’s extravagant birthday lunch for whatever reason and ends up winning a free fashion makeover courtesy of "Fruity Fruit Cocktail." ....ok. Tawny starts to get freaked out and Twitty simply says "I'm starting not to like you" which is understandable, because Louis is quickly slipping into another arrogant phase due to all of the luck he's been having.

Ren and Nelson give Ruby an intervention to stop her ridiculous obsession with BBMak and wanting to marry one of them. Why is this something that never goes out of relevancy? This is still happening today. It’s perhaps more relevant than ever with the rise of internet fandoms and socials like Tumblr. Teens are literally spiraling into genuine insanity over bands like never before. As long as there are teen idols, there will be teen idol fanatics. Can’t really go wrong with a plot-line like this. Ren tells her "You deserve a real life person who's gonna be perfect for you" - Ruby agrees and decides to turn over a new leaf.

The new and improved made-over Louis comes waltzing in, and just like that Ruby replaces her BBMak obsession with a Louis obsession. She’s just blown away by his beauty. Same, tbh. Y’all already know that I HAD THE BIGGEST CRUSH AND THIS EPISODE KILLED ME!!!! Now that I think about it, this very well might've been the episode that solidified my everlasting fondness for Shia LaBeouf.

This isn’t even overdramatic. Ruby is so me. 

Even Ren and Nelson tell Louis that he looks stunning! Well, “stunning” was Louis’ word, not theirs. They just agreed with his conceitedness, lol. Suddenly a bird comes flying into the house and lands on Louis’ shoulder. Of course, it happens to be Pecky -- a missing bird with a $50 reward. OF COURSE!

The next day, Ruby happily tells Ren that she has officially moved on from BBMak. There’s a new guy in her life! Ren is so excited until Ruby reveals the new object of her affection to her: 

Um, is this my room circa 2001 or Ruby’s? I honestly can’t tell. Also I would so buy that big’ol poster of Shia on her closet door. That thing has made a few appearances throughout the series. It’s kind of iconic looking, don’t you think? Maybe that’s just me... 

Just thought I’d mention: Ren asks her “How did you get these pictures?!” and Ruby explains “I downloaded them from the internet. Louis has a very interesting website.” Do I even want to know? Aside from the implied potentially disturbing content, part of me wishes Disney had some sort of interactive fake louisstevens.com website or something like Nickelodeon did with amandaplease.com! 

Tawny insists that Louis' lucky streak is nothing but “admittedly weird coincidences,” until Louis calls in to win the huge BBMak contest and......... wins. I love how he acts so blasé about it. The DJ is so excited and Louis is all "Eh.. What can I say? This whole charmed life thing is getting kinda old." Also, the DJ in this scene, who appears two more times in the series, was one of the many actors recycled for That’s So Raven. He played a news reporter on that show. Similar field. Huh. 

Ren believes that Ruby is simply rebounding with Louis and decides to show her his nasty bedroom to make her realize she doesn't actually like him. Ren also tells Ruby that he’s rotten and selfish, which... Is kinda true sometimes, oops. But at the same time, that scene always makes me a little sad inside. Louis is a good guy at heart, Ren!!

Just then, Louis appears in the doorway asking "What are you doing in my room?" and we get this incredible exchange:

(credit)

Louis then proceeds to very unselfishly invite Ruby to the BBMak recording session which only reinforces her crush on him. 

Okay. We finally make it to this darn recording session! Thank god. Louis might as well’ve brought his entire extended family because he brought four freaking people along with him like it’s some free for all. You usually don’t push your luck when you’re gifted something like that... but, oh yeah. Lucky penny. I freaking love this bit where Ren whispers to Ruby “Woo! He’s gorgeous...” referring to Christian from BBMak, and Ruby says “I know.......” in reference to Louis! LOL. 

Ren is so disgusted and once again Ruby is me.

Shia has been gorgeous in my eyes for nearly my entire life!!!!!!!!! Apparently I'm weird because I've seen so many memes about him that say things like "He was that ugly, weird kid on Even Stevens and then he magically became good looking" I'm just sitting here like??? Y'all are about 14 years late to the party.

Louis and Twitty get distracted by a table with free cheese on it, which honestly is the best part of any and every function or gathering. Not even gonna lie. While hanging around the cheese table, Twitty decides to seize the opportunity and give BBMak an Alan Twitty Project demo tape of “Sacramento Girl.” (YESSSSS!) They lie and say they’ll check it out — but immediately stuff it under a block of cheese. As a musician, I can confirm that this is too real. It’s impossible to get successful/established artists to take you seriously. I met Fall Out Boy at a local radio junket once and slipped Pete Wentz a demo. I never heard anything, sooo... It stings to know that he most likely hid it under some cheese the second I left. 

BBMak are looking for a ‘Sacramento sound’ (whatever that is) and encourage Louis to play some tambourine on their track! They tell him “If this works out, you could come on tour with us!” If only it was that easy to land a national gig in real life. Ruby mentions in passing that she needs to tell Louis how she feels, and TAWNY IS NOT HAVIN’ IT! Omg. She kinda gets jealous of Ruby’s crush and they start a small argument over him. Ren cannot believe what she's witnessing and I love it. Also, Christy looks fantastic here? Whoever did her hair and makeup: Good job!! wow!

Unfortunately, Ruby’s attraction to him is short-lived and comes to a screeching halt the second Louis loses his penny during his tambo solo, jumping around like a lunatic with no rhythm. (Again, HOW does he become a drummer later on? It’s a mystery.) It’s very subtle, but you can tell once Ruby starts finding Louis "odd and annoying," that Tawny is secretly happy about it and still obviously likes him unconditionally even though he's literally insane. Same, Tawny.

So, yeah. Louis loses his penny and his luck runs out. BBMak basically kick him out of the studio. I love how Louis asks them “What about the record and the touring?! What about BBMak-Stevens?!” as if the conversation ever went that far. It’s great. I might’ve spoke too soon about Shia being gorgeous because the faces he makes when he realizes the penny is missing from his pocket are the furthest thing from the adjective: 

It is hysterical, however. And that outweighs everything else here, so.

This episode ends on an AMAZING note: A super cringy music video for “Sacramento Girl”! What more could you ask for?!?! We get some Twitty-Stevens Connection action here and it’s something to behold. 😂  Be on the lookout for Shia doing his classic “shirt-over-the-head” thing he does, HAHA. You can tell some of the vocals were done by middle-aged men (probably Jim Wise) which makes it even more hilarious. My favorite lyric has got to be the Grammy award worthy: “Before I met the girl I had it made... Now she scores higher than the whole arcade. YEAH!” And of course, the episodes’ immortal last words "TAKE THAT, BBMAK!!!!" will go down in history.  

That’s it! I honestly don’t even know why I’m ranking this one “lower.” It’s probably one of my personal favorites but.. Idk man. There are simply other episodes that I like more, lol. This is a totally solid episode though! Super memorable, pretty strong humor (including music-related humor... which you know I love!), and two awesome plot-lines that blend really well! But, even with all of that.. something felt slightly flat about it when re-watching. It could possibly just be from me watching these episodes waaay too much, tbh. It also probably has something to do with it being a “special” episode with guest stars and whatnot. Episodes like that tend to feel like totally separate things to me. 

At this point, we’ve officially reached the REALLY REALLY GOOD part of the list, though. So I don’t feel too bad about placing it here. There are no “bad” episodes from here on out. Well, there are no bad episodes of Even Stevens in general really. But.. you guys know what I mean.

I’m probably gonna regret and rethink this entire list once I finish it anyway so, lol. 

Thanks for reading! 

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