#also his impression of a clone is Bad

[fatuismooches]

Every time recruits were assigned to a Harbinger, they were required to give a speech to the new agents. It was simply the way the Fatui worked - everyone must be made aware and dedicate themselves to the Tsaritsa's will through working for the Harbingers. The experience varied from Harbinger to Harbinger - if one were lucky enough to be with the Captain, they'd be filled with a sense of pride and bravery, if they had the misfortune of working for the Balladeer, well... one could guess how that goes.

Dottore's orientations were also anxiety-inducing, no doubt, considering the kind of reputation he had. Most recruits prayed day and night not to be selected to work for him. It was a very popular rumor about how easy it was to end up as a test subject of Dottore's. However, what many recruits quickly realized was that... working for Dottore was not as bad as many claimed.

Sure, some segments were definitely more difficult to work with than others, but it was actually preferable to working for certain other Harbingers. Just continue to produce results, and you'll be fine. Surprisingly, there were a sizeable amount of agents who adored Dottore. They would rave about him at any given opportunity to anyone who was willing to listen, and that didn't even include their signature handbook. It was also said that if you truly impressed him, he wasn't picky about rewarding you. Unfortunately for new recruits, they were still unaware of this and were left to shiver with their hearts in their throats, awaiting their impending doom.

Even worse for those poor souls, was that a habit of the segments was that they were notoriously late to these meetings, diving deep into their research and discarding it until the last minute. You learned this through idle conversation with one such segment, Beta, who especially despised this baptism.

"So... you just stood there and gave a speech to them?" You couldn't help but find the idea very funny, considering the kind of man he was. "What are your speeches like? Are you motivational, Beta?" He scowled at your teasing and focused his frustration on his latest creation.

"I don't have the time to waste on foolish things."

"Isn't it a good thing to encourage your employees?"

"This is the Fatui. They know what's expected of them," Beta scoffed as if he hadn't turned certain agents into flying robots in the past.

"Aww, but it sounds fun! I would wanna talk to them like that," you sighed. Most of the time the agents would bow, stutter, and quickly make themselves scarce when they saw you. Certain ones would just stare at you in awe silently as if they couldn't believe their eyes, and then scribble something in their notepad. You were unsure of their motives.

"There's a reason why Prime has never attended one himself ever since he created his first segment. All of us fill up our schedules to avoid it," the segment grumbled. He was the one stuck with the duty today. You only hummed in amusement.

"So when is the next screening of new recruits?"

"Tomorrow morning. Hmm, Omega's turn this time too. He's best at these things, anyway." You smiled as you had a very good idea.

"I'm going to go!"

"Are you now? Have fun." Beta responded dryly. Now that he thought about it, if you were so eager, perhaps he should have brought you to do most of the speaking.

"I will. I'll get them to be the most motivated Fatui agents there is!"

—

For a small group of people, they were starting their mornings with possibly one of the most frightening experiences of their lives. It was only natural for them to whisper to each other, all huddled up.

"I wonder if the rumors about Lord Dottore are true. Is he going to dissect us if-"

"You know what I wonder? What segment of Lord Dottore we'll get assigned to. I heard-"

"He has segments???"

"Apparently, he cloned himself at different stages of his life, so we'll deal with numerous versions of him."

"... As soon as the time comes, I'm putting in a request to transfer out of here."

"And that will be your biggest mistake. Lord Dottore is far more generous than you lot make him out to be."

"Pardon?"

"Lord Dottore is quite frequently praised by many agents around here. You just haven't heard them yet. Furthermore, he'll always appreciate results, regardless of your actions." The Dottore defender passionately gripped his chest. The group looked unconvinced.

"Are you sure they weren't under duress or something...?"

"Well, I've met his spouse once too! And [Name] was as kind as-" The poor agent was interrupted by laughter.

"Spouse? The sun would sooner shine bright in Snezhnaya than Lord Dottore ever being married."

"Is he even capable of love?"

"It's not a lie. Many agents who work for our Lord know them! In fact, they-"

"Ahem! Attention everyone!" A voice sounded in front of the room, that was... definitely not Dottore's. There stood a person who was... definitely not Dottore either. The room went completely silent as they gazed upon your rather proud form.

"You all were expecting Dottore, but I, [Name], will start this thing off first!" The glint of your wedding ring became all too noticeable for the new recruits as your eyes scanned the crowd. "Oh, hey! You're that guy I gave directions to a while back! You really did transfer over, huh!" You gleefully waved to him as he scratched his head, in both embarrassment and honor, and the agents suddenly had a feeling that the man was not lying about Dottore's marital status.

"Anyway, I'm gonna ask you all the question I know you're all thinking about. You're absolutely terrified of Dottore, aren't you?!" You pointed at them while their throats were dry from the situation. After a few seconds, they glanced at each other before nodding awkwardly. You only chuckled as you puffed out your chest.

"Well, I'm going to erase all those fears right here, right now. As the person who knows him better than anyone, I can assure you he's a great Harbinger to work under! And to do that... I'm going to give you all a crash course on Dottore's segments! So go on, ask me anything and I shall deliver!" Your resounding confidence was met with blank stares, save for the new inductee into the fan club.

"Are they really Lord Dottore's lover?"

"Well, they have to be... no one can just walk around casually claiming to be married to him."

"I mean... if someone like Lord Dottore is able to fall in love, then he can't be too bad, right...? We should listen to them."

One by one the nervous agents asked you a variety of questions - how to deal with them, how to tell them apart, what to do if they were annoyed, a few quirks to look out for, the kind of work efficiency he valued, the kind of sweets they most favored when it came time to pacify them- the more you spoke, the more engaged the new recruits got. You were rather proud of your skills.

"And if that wasn't enough motivation for you, do it for him!" In the end, you pulled out your one and only pet, the strange blue fox creature who blinked at the crowd who was loudly clapping for some reason.

"You know, I feel a lot more confident about working here!"

"I told you all, you just didn't believe me," the one fan said, still over the moon. But even amidst the commotion, a pair of shoes neatly echoed throughout the room, causing everyone to nearly fall silent at his presence.

"Oh... that's Lord Omega, right? His mask is black." Said agent got elbowed by another for speaking, as they all bowed lowly in respect. The segment was more interested in what you were doing here.

"... [Name], what exactly is the meaning of this?" The segment studied you carefully - despite your sweet smile, he didn't exactly have the best feeling about this.

"I gave them a speech of course! You need to motivate them more, you know? For the results you love so much! I just decided to do your job for you." Your lover stared at you and then turned his attention to the group who were standing stiffly.

"Is that so?"

"Y-Yes, Lord Dottore."

"Then you are all dismissed." The group blinked before quickly shuffling out of the room, mostly in awe at how casually you spoke to the Harbinger. You really were married...

"Just trust me Omega, those guys will be some of your most hardworking agents!" Omega looked at you thoughtfully - their demeanor did seem much better than when he spoke. But he still had a lingering thought that bothered him.

"[Name], you didn't tell them anything potentially... inappropriate, did you?"

"Inappropriate? O-Oh, of course not, Omega. I merely boosted their spirits into working for you!" You smiled, ignoring how his gaze was boring into you.

"That's all?"

"Yes, that's all!"

"..."

"..."

"Well, actually, I-I may have told them about the sweets thing again- hey- don't get closer!"

[black-rose-writings]

Things I have gathered about Danny Phanton without having ever watched the show (from posts and fanfics):

There's ghosts and they're kind of assholes, but they're also all friends and have christmas parties. Their presence is treated as a mild annoyance by everyone except the ghost hunters.

The main character is a dead 14yo. Sometimes. He's also trans.

There are adult professional ghost hunters around. Literally all of them seem like they are just taking out their serial killer urges on ghosts. "Man is the real monster" trope in action. At least some of the ghost hunters are a Men In Black parody.

The dead 14yo actually the most competent at removing ghosts from the mortal plane.

There is another 14yo who is not dead and also hunting ghosts. She's somehow also more competent at it than the adults.

The MC's parents are ghost hunters and want to torture him into perma-death. That is somehow not the biggest problem with their parenting.

(Like, I get that adults in kids' media need to be kinda dumb and immature for the premise of the show/book/movie/whatever to work, but I'm getting the feeling the adults in this show cross the line of 'plot necessary dumbass' into 'fucked up and abusive' territorry.)

One of the ghosts is tiny, piloting a giant mecha suit and dedicated to skinning the MC and hanging his skin on his wall. He somehow also has a cool rocker girlfriend and thinks this will impress her. Jury's out on whether or not that's a good strategy.

There is a ghost called the Box Ghost, who demands to be taken seriously. Nobody takes him seriously.

The MC's nemesis is another dude who is sometimes dead. He looks like a vampire and swears in food. He also wants to kill the MC's dad (for mostly valid reasons) and bang his mom (for no good reason at all) and adopt the MC as his son(mostly because of his hangups around the parents, not because said parents suck at being parents). In a villainous and fucked up way, because he's the main antagonists. He's also a billionaire, has a cat, and is weirdly obsessed with american football (IDK jack shit about american football, but the level of obsession is treated as not normal by the characters so I will assume it is weird and just how americans be like).

There were 3 seasons, but half of the fandom is convinced the third one may have been a fever dream because it's so bad.

There was a finale that everyone pretends didn't happen because it sucked.

There is at least one time travel fix it episode and the time travel ghost wears way too many watches.

The MC has two living friends - Wade from Kim Possible, but thinner and leaves his house, and a jewish goth vegan.

The MC has a clone and she's a baby and a gremlin.

The ships all have the weirdest fucking names.

Somehow half the named characters being dead is not the angstiest part of the show.

I kinda want to know how someone came up with it and what drugs they were taking. IDK if I want to try some or avoid them, but it would be good to know either way.

[suzukiblu]

If you feel up for it, for the writing meme prompt, Clark Kent/Lex Luthor, with the song You And Me by Lifehouse? If it's not your thing I totally get it though and hope you have a great time and fun writing the things that do catch your fancy!

I think we ALL knew that I was gonna do baby Kon for this, lbr. Also ngl, this came out way more cracky than the prompt would suggest it should've but it is absolutely my favorite thing I’ve written for this meme so far, as the necessity for the following cut should help attest, haha.

Unfortunately, Lex takes one look at Cadmus’s progress report on the newly-crafted Experiment Thirteen and realizes he has paternal instincts. 

Well, that’s inconvenient. And a little disgusting, honestly. Certainly a disappointment. 

He supposes it could be worse. He could be Lionel about this. 

Anyway, that’s how he has a physiological four year-old on his lap when he hears the news about Superman coming back to life and fistfighting an evil cyborg with his own face about it, because of course the man didn’t have the decency to just stay dead. Why would he, after all? 

Lex needs a drink. That would be a bad example for the physiological four year-old, though. 

Then again, Experiment Thirteen should be completely immune to the effects of Earth-based alcohol in about another four to six months of consistent yellow sun exposure, so . . . 

Lex is halfway through his second brandy when Superman shows up on his balcony at super-speed wearing a very pretentiously dramatic black suit and looking both winded and bewildered. And still alive, unfortunately. 

“Don’t you have a murderous cyborg to be ensuring is in custody?” Lex asks dryly, deciding to just not acknowledge the presence of the physiological four year-old who’s moved on to messily but methodically coloring on the floor underneath his desk. Lex didn’t actually give Experiment Thirteen either a coloring book or crayons, mind, but he appreciates the clone’s resourcefulness in breaking into the office supplies. Anyway, it’s useful for developing its hand-eye coordination and fine motor control. 

Superman’s pupils are pin-pricks, barely even there at all. Which is an unusual reaction from him, and Lex notes that fact reflexively but doesn’t particularly care about it. Meant-to-be-dead people do unusual things, especially the alien ones. And it isn’t as if–

“Baby,” Superman blurts, his eyes wide. 

Lex . . . pauses. Takes a slow sip of his brandy. 

Alright then. 

“Yes, I’ve noticed,” he settles on eventually, raising an eyebrow at him. Experiment Thirteen peers out from under the desk, immediately decides Superman isn’t an interesting presence, and then goes back to coloring all over Lex’s floor. It seems to be drawing either a puppy or a chain of complex genetic sequencing, but judging by the kinds of things it’s been drawing so far, it’s fifty-fifty. Lex has been getting the impression the clone actually likes art, which is a baffling interest to find in his own progeny, but how does that quote go . . . “I am a warrior, so that my son may be a merchant, so that his son may be a poet”? 

Or something like that, anyway. 

“No, I–baby,” Superman stresses, looking bewildered as he floats down a little closer to the open balcony door. 

“. . . yes, I’ve noticed,” Lex repeats, raising his eyebrow again and taking another sip of brandy. Superman looks frazzled, bobbing up a little higher in the air again to get a better view of Experiment Thirteen under the desk. Experiment Thirteen keeps ignoring him in favor of its coloring, displaying no apparent interest in the most powerful uninvited guest in the history of illegal immigration. Lex experiences a moment of overwhelming paternal pride, which is such a bizarre and unanticipated experience that he doesn’t even know what to do with it. 

“Where’d he come from?” Superman asks with a wondering expression. Ugh.

“A cloning lab,” Lex replies dismissively, setting his near-empty glass down on the desk. It’s hardly worth lying about Experiment Thirteen’s origins at this point. He didn’t want to murder everyone in Cadmus to keep the secret. He might need them if there’s an issue with Experiment Thirteen’s genetics later, after all. “We mixed it up a couple weeks ago while you were off wasting everyone’s time being dead."

“You had my baby?” Superman says, tilting in the air and still staring at Experiment Thirteen, as if he's somehow forgotten both how much kryptonite Lex owns and how much kryptonite he keeps specifically in this office. “While I was dead. You had my baby while I was dead.” 

. . . alright then, Lex thinks again, both eyebrows raising this time. 

“I really wouldn’t put it that way, personally,” he says. “Also, I don’t recall saying it was in any way yours.”

“Baby,” Superman repeats inanely, then lands on the floor and ducks down into a crouch to peer under the desk better, his pupils still reduced to barely-there pinpricks. Lex is so mystified he doesn't even activate the security system or the weaponized red sun lamps. Experiment Thirteen frowns at Superman–Lex, again, basks in unanticipated paternal pride–and then turns its back on him and hides all its drawings from him as seriously and carefully as if they were under NDA. 

It's almost adorable, frankly. 

Not that Lex finds things adorable, of course. 

“His heartbeat's so cute,” Superman says, looking absolutely fascinated. Which is surprisingly useful of him to mention, actually, since Lex had previously been vaguely concerned that Experiment Thirteen's odd thrumming heartbeat might be a sign of a heart defect, but apparently it’s just a Kryptonian thing. A . . . “cute” Kryptonian thing, according to Superman. 

Lex is increasingly mystified by this interaction. 

“Can’t say I’ve spent much time listening to it, personally,” he lies, because he has in fact obsessed over that heartbeat’s health and stability since first finding out about its unusualness and has done a truly aggravating amount of research into heart murmurs and conditions and the like. But that’s hardly Superman’s business, now is it. 

“. . . what’s his name?” Superman asks hesitantly. Lex is possibly having an out of body experience. 

“Experiment Thirteen,” he says. Superman immediately looks offended. 

“We need to give him a name, Lex,” he says. Lex, again, has an out of body experience. 

“‘We’?” he repeats incredulously. “I made it, I get to decide what it’s called.” 

“He’s got my DNA!” Superman protests, looking indignant. Lex has absolutely no idea how to process that expression. 

“It has both our DNA, in fact, yours was too irritating to stabilize alone,” Lex informs him dubiously. More accurately it was literally impossible to stabilize alone, but he’s not mentioning that to Superman. “So it has my DNA, and I made it. And also put eight point two billion dollars into its production, as a lowball estimate. Therefore I’m the one who decides what its name is, thank you very much.” 

“Lex,” Superman says disapprovingly. “You can’t call a baby Experiment Thirteen.” 

“It’s physiologically developed enough to complain if it doesn’t like it,” Lex retorts, narrowing his eyes at him. Superman frowns at him. Lex has never had a more ridiculous conversation with the man, including all the times Superman’s tried to appeal to his nonexistent “better nature”. “Well it is.” 

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Superman says, then ducks back down and peers at Experiment Thirteen again, gentling his voice to address it while Lex is still incredulously mouthing “ridiculous”? to himself. “Would you like a real name, kiddo?” 

Experiment Thirteen sticks its tongue out at him. 

Lex is finding parenthood to be a very rewarding experience, actually. 

[stellarbit]

Pushing Limits

Work Count: 4.2 Pairing: fem!reader x Wrecker NSFW Warnings: Big ole size kink w/ associated pain, piv, poorly proofread Summary: The Bad Batch are sent to train some Jedi, you being amongst them. You and Wrecker can't stop thinkin about each other after you spar.

Having spent your youth in the temple, you developed a disinterest in the temptations of attraction as an adult. It wasn’t that others weren’t attractive to you; on the contrary, you found many beings attractive. Instead, your disinterest stemmed from the warnings of attachment and a lack of clarity on how to enjoy attraction without it.

So, for a short time, you’d experimented with physicalities. They required no emotional attachment, therefore, you saw no reason to not explore. The pleasure of others was a high that quickly became an unnecessary hassle. Partners could make things interesting but they rarely lived up to your expectations. Especially when you could find a more satisfying release on your own.

Training with five exceptionally trained, and exceptionally handsome, men tested that mindset.

The Bad Batch had been assigned a training mission on Coruscant. The Jedi Council requested an elite squad to train fresh Jedi Knights for a month. You were amongst the class and while the opportunity was an exciting one, your attention was hardly in the present.

At first, outside of their talent and appearances, there was nothing that you hadn’t experienced before. Not to mention the fact that clone troopers typically maintained a healthy boundary with their Jedi companions. About a week in, when individual training sessions came into play, you definitely noticed something different.

The first break in your indifference came when one of them, their technician - aptly named Tech, bluntly pointed out a weakness of yours. The comment was not only blunt to the point of tactlessness but also made in front of your fellow Jedi Knights.

"Your defense is sloppy," he observed, literally pointing at you. "You rely too much on your Force abilities. What happens when you're facing an opponent who can resist them?"

You stood still, captured in your final stance in defending against Hunter. You stared Tech down, a twitch ticking your eye as you considered his comment. A clone trooper negating your abilities certainly caught your attention - not in the most positive way. You’d shoved off the comment with more ire than your cohorts were accustomed to and were quick to dismiss yourself when the opportunity came.

Later that same evening you found appreciation for Tech’s observation. Despite receiving consistent praise for your abilities, no one had truly challenged you in recent memory. You prided yourself on maintaining humility, yet it seemed humility alone couldn't shield you from becoming complacent.

Impressed and eager for further challenge, you welcomed the next training session.

The troopers adjusted to instructing without an audience, most likely due to your reaction. Leaving you one on one with two troopers Wrecker and Hunter, one to spare with and the other to observe. 

“Wrecker here even bested General Skywalker once,” Hunter boasted, playfully clapping his brother on the shoulder. “He’s sure to teach you a thing or two.” With that, Hunter stepped back from the ring, gesturing grandly towards his imposing brother.

Facing Wrecker was a new challenge; his sheer size was unlike any opponent you had faced before. Initially, you managed to agilely dance around him, but it wasn't long before he caught you. With a swift pull, he twisted your arm behind you and pressed your back against his chest. Despite your struggles against his overwhelming strength, it all seemed futile until you managed a desperate kick against his ankle.

Even without the help of the Force, your strike was enough to unbalance him, and you both tumbled forward.  Wrecker freed arm and pulled up a knee to soften the blow. Regardless of his efforts he landed on top of you, caging you in and his weight pressing down. He groaned as he collected himself, his body shifting against you. Most noticeably you felt the hard mound of his codpiece grinding against you.

The position you were in registered with you - and the parallels it had to a more intimate variety. For the first time in a long time, heat rushed to your core. As he shifted to regain his bearings, the unintentional contact sent an unexpected rush of warmth through you, drawing a quiet bite to your lip to suppress any involuntary sounds.

“Ugh,” Wrecker shook his head and sat back on his knees. “Sorry about that, but good hit.” You quickly squirmed out from underneath Wrecker, acutely aware of his view of your ass. 

“If you’re going to crush someone,” You hissed as you freed yourself. “Maybe ditch the armor.”

Wrecker glanced down at himself, but smiled sheepishly. “Oh, sorry ‘bout that.”

From across the room, Hunter shook his head. “You need to learn how to get away from someone bigger than you.” He waved a hand between you and his brother. “If all it takes to bring you down is getting caught, you’ll end up dead in no time.”

Your cheeks flushed at the perceived scolding. 

“Hey,” Wrecker leaned over, giving an encouraging shake. “Don’t you worry. That’s what I’m here for.”

The idea of regularly sparring with Wrecker sent another wave of heat through you. You believed in his reassurance, you knew you’d learn quickly enough. It was having to simultaneously learn a lesson in focus that was now daunting you. Although, you though, what’s work without a little fun?

Offering him a rare smile you sighed, “I’m sure you’ll be teaching me a lot.”

Your lessons were daily and scheduled like a training camp. Each member of Clone Force 99 instructed a variety of trainings and your class rotated through them in teams as welll as solo. You took something from each exercise, absorbing as much out of the trainings as possible. Your lessons with Wrecker, however, were always the highlights of your days. 

Not only were his exercises in close combat and strength training personally fun for you, feeling his body against you in any way left you panting in a different way. There was a rush in being turned on by Wrecker without his knowledge. His instruction required his frequent touch as he moved you through maneuvers, while his sparring was aimed at capturing you.

You let him more times than you liked to admit. But Tech had been right, without using the Force to push opponents or jump away you found evading Wrecker challenging. Every time he did get a hold of you it was a struggle to both get free as well as not go limp in his arms. 

Your favorite was his snatching you by the waist and yanking you back against him. It delivered enough force to hide how you pressed back into him. He’d come to training sans armor since your first lesson, but you still felt the cup he wore when he was against you. 

You'd done an excellent job of hiding your perverted intentions until you landed in the same position that got you into this mess.

Wrecker had set you up to be captured again. You nearly ducked out of his reach but he swung his arm with surprising agility and slammed you back against him. As you did the very first time, you kicked a foot into his ankle and knocked him off balance. The two of you tumbled to the ground and, while he did his best to soften the blow, Wrecker weighed down on top of you. With his crotch nestled perfectly into your ass, you mindlessly ground back into him. 

You weren’t able to stop your body, but you caught the whine that threatened to escape you. All you could do was hope he hadn’t felt you as Wrecker gathered himself. The familiar press of his cup to your backside almost made you repeat the same mistake.

"Wrecker," Crosshair interjected from the sidelines, his tone dry. "Get off her; you're crushing her." His words snapped you back to reality, reminding you of the observers. Flustered and embarrassed, you began shoving Wrecker off energetically.

“Although…” An amused air came to Crosshair’s voice. “She might like it.” It was an obvious tease, but your guilty pleasure added unintended weight to it.

If anyone’s enjoying this, Wrecker thought to himself, it was him. A fact he struggled to hide every time he saw you. Wrecker enjoyed seeing you improve, enjoying even more how comfortable you’d become with him in the process.

Weirdly enough, you reminded him of Crosshair in the way you hid a soft side beneath your steely demeanor. The first time smiled at him after, Wrecker thought the planet had stopped spinning. 

Mesh’la, he’d thought for the first time in his life. Something he’d said to others in the throes of pleasure, but seeing you invigorated, panting, and smiling before him - Wrecker realized what the word was truly meant for. 

From that point on, he sought you out in every room, straining for any opportunity to hear your voice. He wasted no chance to approach you, even having wrangled you into sharing a meal or two with his squad. Each night he revisited the feel of you against him, envisioning how you else might feel against him. 

Ditching his armor meant he got a taste of that most times you sparred. Any time he caught you, he did it with enough force you wouldn’t catch him intentionally pressing into you. It was a risky game, but Wrecker couldn’t help himself with you. He wanted you.

So, Wrecker thought, if anyone was enjoying it all - it was him.

“Stow it, Crosshair.” Wrecker bit at his brother, trying to help you to your feet.

“Why so shy, Jedi?” Crosshair snorted, rolling a toothpick to one side of his mouth.

You shook with embarrassment, perceived by them as rage, and snapped, “You’re both insufferable.” 

Wrecker watched you march off, catching the red tint on your ears. He was upset with Crosshair for cutting his time with you short. Moreso he was worried you were upset with him. “I’m going to check on her.”

“Good luck with that,” Crosshair scoffed. “Two credits you come back missing a limb.”

Wrecker only grumbled in response, jogging off to catch up with you. You were at the helm of your quarters when he finally got to you. You stopped, took a deep breath, and turned to him.

“Wrecker, I’m sorry but -”

“Can I come in?” Wrecker took a step closer, his brows pulled together.

You blinked at him, a bit more embarrassment sinking in. Nodding along you silently motioned for him to follow. Once inside Wrecker wasted no time, he immediately started talking.

“You’re upset, I—I know," he started, clasping his hands together nervously.

“I can’t stop thinking about you, Wrecker.” You blurted out, his eyes widening. 

Running your fingers through your hair you began a nervous circle around the room. "Every time you touch me, I feel like I can't breathe. When we spar, I’m imagining you—" You stopped abruptly, turning to Wrecker with a pleading look. "Wrecker, I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t—"

Wrecker reached out and gently grasped your shoulder, silencing your rambling. “What’re you imaginin’?” he asked softly.

Squeezing your eyes shut you quickly came to terms with telling the truth. On a fast exhale you, you met Wrecker’s eyes and admitted, “When you touch me all I can think about is you being on me and feeling your-”

“You felt that?”

A touch of panic in his voice made you hesitate, but you continued, “-codpiece against me.” His response was a few wide eyed blinks, still processing the nuance. Already prepared for embarrassment you added, “And I imagine it’s not just your armor and it’s all-” you cut yourself short when Wrecker pulled one of your hands towards him.

He pressed your palm against his crotch where a thick, hard member strained against the fabric. You instinctively slid your touch along the length of his bulge. Even through his pants you knew your hand couldn’t even close around him. Pressure twisted between your legs at the thought.

Wrecker winced at the pleasant pressure of your touch. With his eyes squeezed shut he groaned, “It’s not armor. I-I’m sorry, I thought I was hiding it.” The large man made to step back out of your touch but you stepped with him to maintain that connection.

The two of you stood like that for a few heartbeats. You had Wrecker’s full attention and with it you pressed into him, feeling the length of him twitch into your touch. 

“This,” you pressed into him for emphasis. “Is your reaction when we spar?”

Unable to resist the temptation of your touch, he rolled his hips into you. “This happens anytime you’re near me.”

Your mouth went dry at the same time warmth pooled in your core. “So you want me like I want you.”

His eyes finally opened as he searched your face. “You want me?”

Your response was pulling his hand from your shoulder and guiding him into your pants. He followed the suggestion, his two middle fingers slipping over your slit. You could feel how excessively wet you were already. So could he. “Oh you want me, alright.” Wrecker chuckled, his middle finger teasing your entrance. 

This time it was you who couldn’t resist moving. You gyrated your hips enough to get the tip of his finger inside you. Wrecker answered your touch by moving his finger and you cried out as he worked a second digit inside. “I’ve wanted you since the moment you pinned me.” You admitted.

He used his touch to lift you to your tiptoes. “You think you can take me?” It wasn’t a tease, he wasn’t challenging you. This was his asking permission.

“If I can’t,” You pressed your hand harder against his cock. “Then make me.”

“Where?” He asked and you answered with a quick nod in the direction of your bed.

Wrecker slipped his free hand beneath your ass and hauled up you up - two fingers still inside you. Walking to the bed, each of his steps pulled a noise from you as you bounced on his fingers. He plopped you both down on the bed, his back resting against your headboard.

Against your wishes, he removed his fingers from you and let you sit back in his lap.

“If we’re going to do this.” Wrecker gripped your hips and put little space between you “We take it at your pace.”

You didn’t wait for his permission as you started shedding your clothes, setting the tone early. The first to go was your top, your undergarments and all flicking over your head to the floor. Your nipples were already perked and aching for him - much like every other part of you.

“Then what are we waiting for?” You smirked as you started on your bottoms.

Wrecker grinned, a sight that almost made you moan, and sat up in bed. He pulled his top over his head, discarding it with yours. His burly chest was freckled in scars under curled hair. You momentarily dismounted him, wriggling from your bottoms as he did the same. There were only a few hot seconds until you sat naked on your knees next to him and he relaxed back in a similar state.

The trooper looked at you and his hand drifted to his cock. His cock that was even larger than you expected. Two fingers were definitely not enough of a preview for his girth. Wrecker’s fingers wrapped around himself, stroking as he watched you. “So beautiful.” He mumbled.

His words had you crawling over him, pinning his hand in place as you settled on top. Reading your movements, Wrecker met you as you leaned down, catching your lips in a kiss. He twisted his grip on himself, his knuckles grazing your folds, as he moaned into you.

You picked up the pace, frantic to taste as much of him as he could. While you sucked on his lip, Wrecker began positioning you on his cock. He was as desperate to be inside of you as you were for him.

With Wrecker’s help, you hovered over his cock. You were at the full height of your knees in order to line him up with you. Wrecker gave himself one more pump as his precum mixed with your wetness. 

His head was the first real warning of your task at hand. He was larger than you’d ever had and you were in no way ready to take him. An aspect that was making you even wetter. He didn’t slide in easily when you lowered yourself. You both moaned against the strain. “Wrecker.” You moaned into his mouth, a plea in his name.

“I gotcha.” He grasped your hip and kept a hold on his cock. Applying a steady strength, Wrecker pushed you onto his cock. When the flare of his head finally breached you, your back arched. “There we go,” he pressed you with a kiss, “that’s my girl.” 

The head of his cock already had you pushed to the limit, not helped by the fact you were already quivering for him. His size came with a pain you thought might end you and one that eagerly gave way to pleasure

“Wrecker.” You whined, a smile fluttering to your lips. Your hips undulated over him, working more of him inside of you.

A calloused hand slid up your stomach to cup your breast. Wrecker happily groaned as you moved farther down. “You feel so…” the grip you had on him pulled another groan from him. “So good.”

Wrecker supported you as you moved, consumed in watching you work him and the juices dripping down him. Each time you lifted off him, you lowered with a little more force to get more of him inside. Wrecker’s large form writhed beneath you, resisting as hard he could to not thrust up into you - he wanted you to adjust at your own pace. 

As you made a rhythm of burying him deeper inside you, Wrecker watched the shape of his cock bulge through your abdomen. Gently, he pressed a hand beneath your belly button and over the shape. The pressure sent a thrill straight to your clit, nearly undoing Wrecker with what it did to your pussy.

You were so taught around him, Wrecker feared he might literally tear you open. Though, any care he had for that was lost when your smile turned lazy and you leaned forward, arms hanging around his neck.

“Wrecker.” Each syllable came with another desperate thrust as you worked for his last two inches. You were at the limit of what you could do. “I need all of you. Please,” You tightened around him. “Just fucking ruin me.”

The plea had Wrecker rolling his eyes in time with his hips. He firmed up his hold on your hips, tilting your hips to rock his head against your abdominal wall. Wrecker brushed his lips against yours, “I jus’ don’t wanna hurt you.”

You took his bottom lip into your mouth with a gentle suck, then gently bit down until he gasped. “I don’t care.” You mumbled.

Still seated within you, Wrecker swung you onto your back. His hold on your hip suspended you in the air for him. He glanced down at where you two were joined, checking on the last bit of his length you were so hungry for. The contour of his cock already protruded through your stomach, more than anyone had ever taken him before. He really didn’t know if he’d manage the rest, but he wasn’t going to make you ask again. For you, he was determined, he was going to make it fit.

Wrecker drew back before pushing in with his own exploratory thrust. He lowered himself onto you so that he was all you could see, feel, and smell. You were eclipsed by him, hardly even able to angle your legs around him. Saddling a forearm next to your head, Wrecker kept a hand on your hip. “Now breathe, Mesh’la.”

The strange word barely reached you through your aroused fog. “Mesh’la?” You asked on an inhale, anchoring your hands on his shoulders.

He pulled back once more, as you inhaled and thrust himself firmly inside. “Beautiful.” He hummed into your ear. He didn’t stop moving when he bottomed out, he pushed through the strain, making you take him until he felt you give way entirely. You both gasped at the shared sensation. 

Wrecker pressed a kiss to your throat, smiling as he announced, “I’m all in.” Wrecked pressed another kiss to your throat and couldn’t stop grinding as you stretched around him.

You were speechless, only mewling and whining as you squirmed around him. “So full.” Each movement was tinged with pain as Wrecker stretched you completely. A sensation that flared into fervent pleasure the longer he spent inside her.

Wrecker angled your head for you to see what he’d done so far. You softly cried at the sight of a bulge below your belly button. As you watched, Wrecker rolled his hips back and thrust inside allowing you to witness him completely filling you. He hadn’t expected the way you moved in response nor how you began to relax around him.

Mindlessly, you moved yourself over him, pleasuring yourself as you rocked on his cock. Your G-spot was at constant attention as Wrecker pressed inside you.

“Ohh, you like that, don’t you?” He cooed warmly to you, moving his hips side to side against yours. 

Something in you snapped as gripped the back of his neck, forcing his eyes on you, and demanded. “Wrecker, I said, ruin me.” 

Wrecker chuckled eagerly as he obliged, moving against you with increasing speed. He lowered you both to pin you down by the hips. You braced yourself on your elbows as he mercilessly drove into you. He angled your hips just enough that he steadily brushed your clit. 

Pleasure built in you, winding tight every time Wrecker’s hips hit yours. You’d barely begun and already you were at the cusp of release. “Right there, right there, right there.” You chanted, begging with every breath for more. 

With every thrust, more heat hit your core and Wrecker felt the quaking of your core. He smiled and brushed a thumb over your lip before dipping it in past your teeth. Wrecker let you taste him for a moment before saying, “I wanna really fill you up.” Your eyes snapped to his as you smiled around his thumb. “Can I?” He asked desperately.

You eagerly nodded at him, pulling your mouth free to say, “Inside me, please.” 

His hips slammed into yours with all his might and as the first throb of his orgasm hit, you melted around him into your own. The way his cock throbbed pushed you further into delirium. As you adjusted, relaxed, and melted into your pleasure, Wrecker remained engorged and twitching inside you.

You lifted to give him a soft kiss. “That was amazing.” Wrecker hummed in response, something amusing in what you said.

“Oh, I’m not done yet.”

He pulled out of you just long enough to get his hands around you and position you onto your stomach. Wrecker lifted you by your hips, trapped you between his legs, and lined himself up with your pussy. Leaning over you, he guided your hand to sit under your navel. You could feel his cock he rammed into you, his massive size bulging against your hand. 

Wrecker leaned down to croon into your ear, “No one’s ever gonna be able to fill you again.” He started a pace of long, hard thrusts. He emptied and filled you with each thrust, making a mess of his seed already inside you. 

Pressing against the outline of his cock sent more heat to your clit, until a full body shiver wracked you. Your legs began to quiver and you clamped around him. “Wrecker,” You panted, nearly crying from the stimulation. “You’re going to make me-”

“That’s all I want.” He said and thrust into you with short, firm moves, coaxing you to release. “Cum with me, Mesh’la.”

You broke beneath him, contracting and shaking around him and he railed his cum into you. You felt his cum pumping out in thick ropes, felt your belly swell slightly from the sheer amount of his seed, before it leaked out around Wrecker.

You were panting messes by the end of it. Wrecker’s cock finally softened when he lowered you both to lay down on your sides, him still burried inside you. He gave your stomach lazy strokes as he nestled his face to your the crook of your neck.

“You okay?” He whispered.

Taking a moment to respond, you nodded. Thinking a moment longer, you twisted enough to offer him the soft spot below your ear. Wrecker took the silent offering, pressing kisses to your skin as you said softly, “I don’t think I’ll ever be the same after that.” 

A low laugh reverberated from Wrecker’s chest. “That makes two of us.” He lazily rolled his hip into yours. He rubbed his nose into your neck, smiling as he added. “Let me know when your ready for another round.”

[the-bi-space-ace]

I’m in a Mood™️ so here’s what our favorite clones are like when they want attention:

Echo:

It depends on who he wants attention from tbh. With Fives, Tech, or Crosshair? He’s such a little shit. Has the patience of a tooka that’s grumpy he’s not getting enough pets. Is rather forward about wanting attention, though, which is shocking for him considering he’d rather bleed out than ask for help. Attention is different though. With everyone else he can play up his charms. He’s persuasive and will use his powers of “sweetness” to get what he wants.

Crosshair:

Did I hear someone say cause problems? Yeah. He’s gonna cause problems. He’ll be super grumpy but never say a damn word about what he wants. Best believe he’ll be a little shit on purpose in order to get attention: positive or negative. Any attention is good attention. Also acts like an impatient pets-starved tooka but he’ll bite to get his way instead of head butting. He teases, pokes or prods, makes a fuss out of embarrassing things his squad has done. All to get them to retaliate so he gets what he wants. Little shit.

Tech:

Straight forward man. He’s not shy about asking for attention and he will be honest about it. No grumping although sometimes he’ll get tetchy before he recognizes what it is he wants. He simply interrupts when he wants something. Echo is on his comm and Tech comes up to him, says nothing, takes the comm, turns it off, then starts rambling.

Wrecker:

He’s gonna play. I’m talking roughhousing, pillow fights, tickling, anything for some physical affection. When he’s gone a real long time without any attention he gets sad. Maybe even pouts. Not as sulky as Crosshair can get but he sure does play the kicked mastiff well with those big eyes of his.

Hunter:

Man can’t even ask for a cup of caf let alone affection. Gets cranky and ends up taking a nap instead of just, idk, asking for a damn hug. Has to be bullied into accepting it like it’s the worst thing ever. Dramatic behavior. Almost as bad as Crosshair for fucks sake. Echo nearly tackled him one day bc he kept moping and it was driving Echo up a wall. When the two of them both want attention at the same time just let Echo at him. He’ll wear him down, he’s good at that. No one can resist tooka eyes from Echo.

Rex:

Rex will always suggest an activity he knows the other person likes. It’s his sneaky way to ask to spend time together because he’s sure they won’t say no. He doesn’t like that cafe but Fives does so he’ll suggest it for lunch for some one on one time.

Cody:

Refuses to admit to needing anything he’s big and tough no need to give him anything. He will start to isolate if he’s feeling too itchy for attention. It makes him feel weird that he needs Something. Ridiculous man. Pulls away when he wants to be closer. It’s easier for him with Rex, Echo, or Fives because he’ll just show up and tell them they’re doing something with him and they follow. Anyone else? Can’t do it. Won’t do it. Will show off sometimes to impress his general for some positive feedback.

Fives:

He’s up front about it! But he’s gonna use pestering to get his way! Echo won’t even get a day without Fives trying to bother him for some attention. He gets under Rex or Cody’s skin to get a reaction. They know he’s doing it on purpose and they humor him anyway.

[miss-musings]

Crosshair's 10 Most Impressive Shots in "Star Wars: The Bad Batch"

We're now officially three weeks removed from the series finale, so I thought it'd be a fun time to look back at our favorite sniper and review some of his most impressive shots.

Note, I'll be ranking items from "The Bad Batch" TV show only, so there won't be any entries from "The Clone Wars" S7.

I did get a lot of input from folks here and on Twitter, and a lot of people ended up saying the same ones. I put them on here along with a few of my own.

As for how I determined the order, I judged based on a combination of: the distance of the shot, the size of the target, the speed of the target (if applicable), other external factors like light conditions and weather, and "internal" factors like Crosshair's physical and mental state.

You're free to disagree with which ones I picked and how I ordered them. It's all subjective.

Also, I don't proclaim to be an expert in marksmanship nor am I a military sniper. But, I do have a general baseline for how difficult Crosshair's shots would be IRL. I used to go shooting with my dad a lot at both indoor and outdoor ranges, and I was pretty decent at both pistol- and rifle-shooting. So, that's what I'm using to judge Crosshair's shots.

With that out of the way, let's dive in with #10:

10. Killing Lt. Nolan in 2.12 "The Outpost"

I probably wouldn't have put this one on the list for myself, but I had multiple people suggest it should make the cut.

While this shot is very important narratively, it's not very impressive from a purely technical perspective.

I mean, hitting a relatively stationary human-sized target from a few meters away... It's definitely not the most impressive shot on Crosshair's resume.

However, I did feel it was worth adding to the list for the simple fact that Crosshair is physically exhausted and mentally broken in this scene. He basically uses the last of his strength to kill Lt. Nolan, because he immediately collapses right afterward.

Also, Crosshair might be right-handed, but he's pretty good at shooting his pistol leftie. We don't really see the shot hit Nolan, but if you zoom in after his body hits the ground, you can see that Crosshair shot him straight through the heart. He wasn't leaving that bastard alive after everything he and Mayday went through.

9. Lunch tray ricochet in 1.01 "Aftermath"

Even though this isn't a shot in the traditional sense -- considering there aren't any firearms involved -- I had to put this on the list for two reasons.

One, I had multiple people suggest it; and two, because I've watched this scene dozens of times and only recently found out that Crosshair actually hits two clones with his lunch tray.

He initially throws it at the clone Tech was fighting, presumably knocking him down. But then it ricochets so hard that it basically clotheslines another clone who's just standing there, minding his own business. Dude was hit so hard, he was like floating in midair for a split second.

Also, this plays into my headcanon that Crosshair would be excellent at any sports that require excellent aim and coordination. If he was on a basketball team, he'd be a three-point specialist for sure!!

8. Plan 55 ricochet in 3.12 "Juggernaut"

This is the closest thing we get to a trickshot in S3, so I had to include it on the list.

Here, we see Crosshair's quick-thinking and perfect aim take out several troopers at once by purposely ricocheting his shot off the magnetically sealed doors.

As we know from “A New Hope,” magnetically sealed doors/surfaces are no joke. You really have to know what you're doing or someone's gonna get hurt. Thankfully, Crosshair is a freakin' pro at this!

It honestly reminds me of all those crazy pool shots where you have to plan out four or five bounces/angles ahead to get the angle you really want.

7. Downing a spaceship on Ryloth in 1.11 "Devil's Deal"

NOTE: This is the only clip I couldn't readily find on YT. So I included the clip of Crosshair killing Orn Free Taa from the same episode to maintain symmetry in this Top 10 list.

Don't let the clip fool you. The shot I'm actually talking about takes place before this, when Crosshair -- from like 300 meters away, mind you -- takes down a fast-moving ship by shooting one of the engines.

Look, I love S3 Crosshair with all my heart, but his shooting abilities were severely diminished after his time on Tantiss. When I was doing my S1 rewatch and got to this scene in 1.11, I was like "Oh yeah, I forgot Crosshair used to be able pull off crazy shit like this."

It's actually sad how many of his made shots in 1.11 are like an inverse of his missed shots in 3.11. Here, Crosshair easily shoots a tracker onto Hera & company's ship, and later shoots the engine with no problem, despite the speed and distance.

In 3.11, though, he misses CX-2's ship and fails to track Omega back to Tantiss. 😭

6. Shooting Wrecker's knife in 1.01 "Aftermath"

Now we're getting into the really impressive shit! Most of these remaining entries have Crosshair shooting small targets and/or fast-moving ones.

In this instance, it's both. Wrecker throws the knife like this is skeet-shooting or something, and Crosshair just very casually shoots it into a droid.

Have you ever seen someone who was so good at their job/hobby that they make it look effortless? Like they're not even trying? This happens to me sometimes when I watch the Olympics. I'm like, "That's not so hard. I could probably do that." And then I try it for like half a second, and I'm like, "Oh no, those people are insane."

That's how good S1-2 Crosshair is. He makes shooting a fast-moving knife look effortless.

5. His four-kill trickshot in 1.15 "Return to Kamino"

These next three are all no-brainer entries. I think the biggest question will be why I went with the order I did.

Here, we have Crosshair displaying two very important elements of marksmanship/sniping: patience and careful aim.

Crosshair evidently set up at least four mirrors (I counted the ricochets in the shot) well in advance in the exact spots he needed to take down his Imperial squad, if need be. That's some serious foresight and preparation -- to know exactly where everyone would be standing, and have all the mirrors ready to go ahead of time.

He must've set them up even before he brought Hunter into the training room, or Hunter would've seen them and probably signaled his teammates.

He's also hitting a target that seems to be somewhere between the size of a golf ball and baseball from like 10-20 meters. And with his sidearm.

I know everyone loves the hallway mirror ricochet to kill the squadron of battle droids in TCW Season 7, but it didn't qualify. But, honestly, I think this one is more impressive anyway. He hit the first 1.15 mirror from farther away than he does in TCW S7, and he's using his pistol in 1.15 rather than his rifle and scope.

Talk about accuracy!

4. Sniping the tank in 2.03 "The Solitary Clone"

Oh man! I think we all love this one, right? It's just one of my favorite sequences in the entire show -- the framing, the colors, the effects of the dirt flying up behind him.

I love how Crosshair baits the droids to get the exact angle he needs, and the dude clearly has nerves of steel for staring down the barrel of a tank without flinching. I wonder how many times he's done it, considering he seemed to know exactly how to beat them. I'm guessing at least a dozen.

This is another example of "expert making their expertise look effortless," when in reality, we'd all shit ourselves if we attempted to do the same.

Honestly, sometimes I wish we could've had this version of Crosshair face off against Hemlock in 3.15 -- the dude who stared down the barrel of a tank and didn't flinch at the most literal version of "kill or be killed."

3. Stairwell trickshot in 2.03 "The Solitary Clone"

While I love the tank sequence more for the aesthetics, I have to rank the 2.03 stairwell trickshot above it.

That's partly because Crosshair's still physically and mentally recovering from nearly getting choked to death. But, it's also partly because -- just like with Wrecker's knife -- Crosshair is shooting a target that someone else is throwing.

That means he has to adjust to whatever trajectory and speed they throw it at and compensate accordingly, which can understandably be very hard to do in a split-second.

And, in this situation, Crosshair can't even see the puck directly. He's looking at it through at least one or two layers of reflective mirrors. Dude's reaction time is insane!

He also manages to take down at least four or five droids with a single shot, including the tactical droid, which is several meters up the stairwell and into the next room.

I'm not sure if the clones learned any advanced mathematics during their training on Kamino. But if they did, I think Crosshair would've loved geometry and maybe trigonometry too! He would also absolutely kill in a game of pool. I wanna see him go to the SW equivalent of a pool hall, and show Omega that he can hustle people too! He just needed to find a game that would better suit his strengths. LOL

Anyway, as insane as this shot is, Crosshair has two others on his resume that are even more impressive:

2. Saving Omega & AZI in 1.16 "Kamino Lost"

This is one of three entries on this list that *no one* mentioned when I asked for suggestions, but I had to include it. That's because it is -- without a doubt -- the most bafflingly impressive shot Crosshair makes in the entire show.

I have watched this scene dozens of times, and I still have no idea how he knows where Omega and AZI are.

Initially, I thought -- as others did -- that he's using an infrared scope to see their body heat in the water. But, that doesn't appear to be the case.

The only times I can recall Crosshair activating an infrared capability is when he has his rangefinder, which is attached to his helmet. As we see in episodes like 1.01 "Aftermath" and in 3.07 "Extraction," he specifically has to put the rangefinder down in front of his eye to use the infrared option.

No, his scope is just that -- a regular scope. The infrared capability is only attached to his helmet's rangefinder, which he doesn't have in this scene.

Thus, I have no idea how Crosshair is using a regular-ass scope to find Omega and AZI in the dark ocean. The point of a scope is to see better, and I don't know what he might see beside more darkness. AZI's eyes aren't active and, even if Crosshair spots Omega's flashlight, Omega dropped it when she went after AZI, so it's not exactly on her.

I'm willing to believe that Crosshair has better eyesight than the average human in the Star Wars universe or IRL, but his eyesight must be insane if he can see them in the water, even with a scope.

But, whether it's eyesight, some other enhanced sense or just plain luck, Crosshair knows where in the vast, dark ocean they are — not just the angle but the depth too!

It's really hard to tell how far down they are, but I'd say at least 20 meters. And if he is able to see them somehow, he might have to adjust the shot for refraction in the water too.

Plus, unlike the other entries on this list, Crosshair isn't shooting a blaster bolt. He's shooting a cable, meaning he'd have to adjust his shot to accommodate its weight and trajectory once it hits the water. Additionally, with how Omega and AZI are situated, he needs to have the cable hit and latch onto AZI, without hitting Omega in the process, and get the exact angle needed to drag both of them to the surface.

Like I said: I have absolutely no idea how he made this shot. It's definitely the most impressive one he makes in the entire show based solely on external technical factors.

But of course, there is a parallel shot later in the series that's his most impressive one of all...

1. Freeing Omega in 3.15 "The Cavalry Has Arrived"

I will never shut up about this scene. It's been living in my head rent-free for three weeks already, and will continue to for several months.

This is undoubtedly the most important shot in Crosshair's life: the shot to save his kid and free his family from Hemlock once and for all.

And everything is working against him: It's dark. It's raining. Omega and Hemlock are like ~40 meters away. The target is the binders between their hands, which is like 3-5 centimeters wide, and won't exactly be stationary. Oh, he's using CX-2's stolen blaster, which doesn't even have a scope on it!!!

We the audience get a POV of what Crosshair sees from over his shoulder, and I can barely see Omega's face, let alone her hands!! I said in the previous entry that Crosshair's eyesight has to be better than the average person's because, holy hell, how can he see that?!?

And, even worse, Crosshair is physically and mentally spent in this scene. He had to return to his own personal hell -- the place where he was tortured and traumatized for months -- then got beaten in a fight and had his dominant hand chopped off.

He and Hunter are running on pure adrenaline at this point. They are absolutely hellbent on getting their kid back, even if they die or collapse in the process. They were practically hobbling out of the CX lab together, and when they crouch down on the bridge, Crosshair has to steady himself against Hunter because he doesn't have his other hand.

And, as the final cherry on top of this proverbially shitty sundae, Crosshair absolutely terrified of missing.

A few episodes ago, the guy couldn't hit stationary fruit from like ~15 meters away with a scope in daylight and in a controlled environment. He even tells Omega: "Close doesn't count. It's either a hit or a miss." Because in a high-stakes situation like this, missing your shot could mean death for you or someone else.

Crosshair already feels like he failed Omega because he missed the shot on Pabu. And now, he has to make an even tougher one with every disadvantage stacked against him and her life literally in his hand.

I don't blame the guy for doubting himself.

Thankfully, Hunter and Omega have complete faith in him, and despite everything he's been through in S3, he has faith in himself.

And so, in the shot to end all shots in "The Bad Batch," Crosshair hits his target and frees Omega.

He and Hunter then subsequently turn Hemlock into Swiss cheese before Omega gives Crosshair a much-needed hug, causing me to cry for the 100th time.

I'll admit: as much as I would've loved seeing another mirror trickshot or some other crazy ricochet in the finale (or just S3 in general), this scene is basically perfect.

It also makes for a nice little parallel to the S1 finale, where Crosshair saved Omega's life after she saved his. Here, as he says himself, he goes back to Tantiss to free her because she freed him first.

As someone said on Twitter when I asked for ideas about this list:

"(Crosshair) put his whole heart and soul in this shot, and he didn't miss. He couldn't afford to."

Like I said: this was the shot that freed the entire Bad Batch family from Hemlock forever. So, I think by default, it had to be No. 1 on this list.

*******

Anyway, thanks for reading! It'd be fun to put together another TBB list like this. I guess I'll have to pick a subject first, though, because I don't have any ideas. If you have any, send them my way!

(EDIT: For anyone who’s also on Twitter, give me a follow. @CatchingClassic )

[mortuarywriting]

Falling into Place

Ao3 Link - [First] - [Next Chapter ->]

All things considered this isn't what you were expecting to wake up to when you went to bed. One minute you're on your phone, trying to pass out, and the next? You're here. You've had some interesting greetings in your life, but dropping about six feet and having twelve guns leveled at your face? That takes the cake

Warnings:

Reader Insert, Plus-Size Reader, The Author Regrets Everything, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Isekai, canon divergence Look we're gonna dig into the implications of omegasverse changing bits and pieces of history as well as addressing whatever the FUCK is happening as CoD's history. Idk man Godzilla is canon and nobody bats an eye at that fact and you think I'm gonna be normal about that? No

You could be having a worse day, you think, as you stare at the interrogation table you're cuffed to. They could've shot you the second you fell the six feet from the sky into a random army base. That's a very real thing that could've happened.

But no, you just had a dozen guns pointed at you in one moment and a slew of questions you didn't have satisfying answers for.

No, you had no idea how you got there. You'd been in bed tooling around on your phone and then you were falling.

They asked who you worked for, and were not impressed by your mundane answer. You didn't work for some pmc or intelligence organization. You asked them to their faces if they thought you could pass a PT test if you tried. Not that they answered or appreciated your point, mind.

It was only after you gave them whatever identifying information you had that things got… spicy.

"I would love to tell you what this designation of yours is if you tell me what you mean. Is it like a classification of civilian versus enlisted? Is it physical? Is it your horoscope? I don't know what I don't know," you explain again for the Nth time. You didn't wanna play twenty questions but here you fuckin were, captive audience and all.

The man asking you questions had lost his charming good cop look. He was getting more and more annoyed on this one, "your designation," a demand, not a question and sure as shit not an answer.

"Again, would love to tell you! I don't know what you mean! Feels like some kinda Star Wars thing," you grumble the last bit to yourself but the man cocks his head.

His eyes narrow, "what are… Star Wars, you said?"

You blink owlishly, "beg pardon?"

"Star War. Clarify."

It's your turn for your brow to furrow, and furrow it does, "Star Wars? As in the multi-billion dollar franchise created by George Lucas and eventually sold to Disney," your tone is questioning, just shy of asking if the guy lived under a rock but his expression didn't let up and the last thing you needed was bad cop, so you continued, "the story of what happened a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away? The political space series of movies versus Star Trek's more scientific and discovery based longstanding TV show? Nine major movies and the Clone Wars before Disney sunk their talons in. Like yeah we got more shows and movies that expanded the universe but they also cut out decades of book contributions in their acquisition and that kinda sucked. But yeah, that Star Wars?"

"Nine movies," his tone is disbelieving, and now it's your turn for your eyebrows to raise, "can you name them?"

You nod, "well yeah. Do you want them in episode order or release?"

His brows furrow, "did they not release in order?"

"In a sense? Three trilogies, 4-5-6 back in the late 70s early 80s, then 1-2-3 in the late 90s early 00s, and 7-8-9 through the teens. So order, yes, just… not a cohesive one."

"Release, then," he leaned back and crossed his arms, a position you'd love to mimic if you weren't cuffed to the table for… an indeterminate period of time now, actually.

"A New Hope, The Empire Strikes Back, and Return of the Jedi-"

"Woah now, empire? What's a jeddy?"

You give him a blank look, trying very hard to mask your disbelief as you look between him and the mirror behind him. You look at your reflection, take a deep breath, and- "sir would it be easier for you to maybe check the internet?"

He seemed to bristle, nose flaring and looking at you expectantly.

You just… kinda sat there. You tapped your fingers together on the desk and kept the eye contact he was intent on. It took a good minute and him getting progressively pissier before you simply ask, "would you like the other movies now?"

You didn't expect an explosion of movement from the man. He downright snarled and slammed his hands on the table as he burst to his feet, the sudden change sending his chair screeching back before falling with a clatter. You leaned as far back as your cuffed hands would allow, eyes wide and a panic rising.

Both of you turned to look at the door when it slammed open with a barked, "Williams!" 

The man who opened it reared back a bit, "Christ, layin' it on a bit thick," he groused, his tone sounding more like someone chastising a teenager for using too much Axe body spray. He smoothed his posture back into something casual as he fanned the air dismissively with a hand, "cap wants you to take a walk."

Your interrogator- Williams, apparently- stares at the man in the door, the two locking eyes before the one in the door straightens from his purposely relaxed posture. You watch the both of them, noting the shoulders tensing as the two just. Staring at each other? Eventually the guy who'd been grilling you looked away and stormed out, the man in the doorway letting him slip out easily enough before turning a charming look back to you.

He took a minute to fan the door a few times to get newer, blissfully cool air in before he entered the room, "sorry 'bout him. He really did a number in here," the new guy tsked before closing the door quietly behind himself.

Your brow furrowed even as you slowly relaxed a bit, had this Williams guy like… farted or something? A nice quirk of ventilation keeping you from smelling something abhorrent? Either way you simply shrug as he walks in and tips the chair back up, sitting and giving another reassuring smile, "how you doing, love?"

You opened and closed your mouth a few times before simply settling on, "I'm a bit… whelmed? This has been," you give as vague a rolling gesture as you can without your cuffs rattling too badly, "a lot? And I have no idea what just set him off either?"

It's the man before you's turn to quirk a brow, "no idea?"

"If I knew the answers to his questions I'd've given 'em by now. I don't, though, and then he just started staring? And hell I just thought it was some kinda macho 'I can stare the truth out of you,'" you pitched your voice lower and pushed your shoulders out for a second to mimic the douchebag behavior before settling, "so I kept eye contact because I'm so out of my depth I have no reason to lie at all and now…" you trail off, gesturing around the room, "all that."

The man nods slowly, "alright love, could you tell me about the last five years?"

Your brows furrow, "oh fuck, 2019 was five years ago wasn't it. God, time is an illusion. Anyway, you want what I was doing leading up to and through the pandemic?"

You think he might've startled for a second but he simply moved to scratch his chin, "mhmm. Just your thoughts on the last five years is all."

So… you ramble. Because he was nice and not prodding or asking weird questions. You talk to him about your job before the pandemic, how people thought covid was just a flu until the death tolls kept climbing, how tons of governments dropped the ball on a local or country-wide level and how that kicked back onto your life, and then the absolute crapshoot of the last election cycle, the shitty 'oh no this is the new normal everything is fine' behavior that has lead to surges and cycles of a fucking plague and so on. He simply nodded, gave some sympathetic hums and winces appropriately at your experiences.

"And did you go back and watch Star Wars through that? Or other things Disney owned?"

And, well, that was a weird way to phrase it but you shrugged, "the mouse is just shy of a monopoly and not one that anybody can take that down so… yeah, I guess? They kept putting shows out and expanding their Star Wars universe so that's been kinda neat to watch but not just them, no. Couple other games and stuff like that to keep me busy, too," you kinda handwave and shut up because panic rambling to MILITARY PERSONNEL is probably not your smartest move in hindsight. Especially when you don't know his name. A+, self.

You tap your fingers against the metal table as he looks at you, "and you said covid has a long term effect of ruining people's senses of smell and taste?"

You nod slowly, "yeah, dude? It's one of the biggest warning signs for most people? Like if everything starts tasting like it was made by a middle class white mom who keeps shoving random letters in her kids names you should swab? That kinda shit?"

What rock has this guy been living under? You were pretty sure the military were supposed to be way more familiar with this shit all things considered, but you've been wrong before.

It was his turn to give you a bit of a wide eyed look before he poorly covers a laugh, "alright, that's fair. I need to go talk with my captain," he hooks a thumb over his shoulder to the window, which didn't surprise you that there had been people back there. He offers a reassuring smile as he stands, humming idly as he pushes the chair back in. He pauses mid-step, "you mentioned that there were cards…?"

You find yourself nodding slowly, "yeah it was important and you couldn't fly or go to certain places if you didn't have one for a while. Should still have a picture of mine buried on my phone," you really didn't wanna get another first-round of covid shots, you REALLY didn't wanna repeat the 24 hours of suck for no reason.

"Cool, thanks," he flashes another charming grin before he slides out of the room.

You lean back in your chair, what an odd guy. Nice though.

-------

"Right," Gaz says as he opens the door to Price and Ghost, "either our mystery guest is off her nut or she's legitimately from somewhere and somewhen else."

Ghost and Price look at each other before turning back to Gaz, this… complicated matters.

Well, it's not like you hadn't given them information to identify yourself. They'd dig up who you were one way or another.

-------

You stare blankly as the nice man from before gives you a sympathetic look, "what do you mean I'm dead?"

Behind him is a guy you're not sure if he's just fuckoff huge or if he's just moderately huge and it's forced perspective.

You don't think it's forced perspective.

You are absolutely trying not to panic spiral.

You are absolutely doing a horrible job at that.

"Well," he opens the file before him and there's a news article, proudly proclaiming "Locals Die in Horrible Freak Accident" like that's not some form of you that was looking like some smear on the pavement, "there's this. Fingerprints match up. Can check for dental if you're really curious."

"Were there even any teeth left after that," you mumble as you take and read the offered article. Seven people were involved, the pictures used are mostly flattering. Hell, you almost don't mind what pic they used for an alternate you but… "that's certainly not the pic I would've wanted. Maybe this me had different tastes?"

You take the time to actually read through the article. It's not helping because for as much as you stare at the page you're not absorbing any information. Some form of detachment, if this was really you? You'd died. A different you but a you nonetheless. You died and you're reading how it happened. There was a lot to unpack in all this and you just needed to put the suitcase away for now. You'd much rather throw it away at this rate.

You were rapidly coming to the understanding that you and Toto were not in Kansas anymore, and there wasn't a convenient yellow brick road to get yourself back home. No easy way to get the hell out of Dodge either. Was it Dodge or the O.K. Corral that was in Kansas? No the O.K. Corral wasn't in Kansas- Dodge was though, that's right. 

This analogy was getting away from you and some part of you figured this was just your brain trying to protect yourself but… wait, wasn't this a metaphor? There wasn't 'like' or 'as' or goddammit not again.

You recognize some names here and there but largely everyone involved were perfect strangers. The article doesn't cover if it would've been slow or quick. You hope for the smear that it was quick. Smears like that don't happen slowly, right? Well, not unless it's like a dramatic slide down a window, but not usually across pavement like that.

Still not sure how you feel about all of it. Bit morbid being confronted with your mortality like that.

Certainly answered a lot of questions about your theoretical passing you never thought about. Like if the obituary for you in what you know to be your own home and world is just as… really kinda just mediocre as this. Have you really done nothing of note for an obituary? Damn.

You kept pouring over the article, each pass bringing new words into focus that help connect the picture a little bit, but… Something repeated in the article made you pause, "two alphas, four betas, and an omega?" 

There was no decent way to ask about that. Any questions invoked from here would border into dangerous territory better kept between yourself and a private browser history. You knew what you were about but there was no fucking way.

"Their designations," the nice man whose name you still hadn't caught explains, "mostly explaining their secondary gender."

You look at him owlishly. You pray to whatever God might be listening that you wake up shortly. Or that the earth below your feet opens up and swallows you. Whichever comes first, the mortification will snipe you otherwise.

"Please tell me this is an elaborate joke at my expense," you are very quiet as you are trying to get really cool with a lot of things really quickly.

"Negative," the big fucker in the back practically growled and you knew that voice would do things to you if you weren't half stepped out of your own body. 

You missed whatever his followup was but your brow furrowed when you checked the date on the article, "I've been dead for months? That…" you let the paper fall from your hands. Everything about this is wild at best and very overwhelming at worst. 

A lot of this qualified as worst.

You look up at the two, missing the odd look they shot at each other as you try to pull yourself back together, "so now what? You've got a not-a-smear of me that fell from the sky onto a secure military base, and where I'm from we didn't have," you paused to gesture between the paper and the two soldiers, "dynamics was it? That was just a fanfiction special."

"Fanfiction."

The way he said it was so carefully neutral you paused, "oh my god without Star Trek to popularize fanfiction and the fan community, how has fandom evolved? Is fanfiction a thing- well, yes, it does fanfics have been a thing since Dante Alighieri wrote the Divine Comedy and even before- well, the question is more if it's still popularized? Are there still the wattpad fics of- I am getting so off track. What exactly is the next step?"

You look from the nice man to the big fucker and back, neither saying anything but looking at you with careful blankness.

You felt like you were being weighed and measured in their eyes.

You hoped to anyone listening that you weren't found wanting at least. Not when you're in the shit situation it looks like you ever so increasingly fell into.

"Considering I'm. Not smear. And very much not from here? Are blanks a thing? Or is that what a beta is I'm," you trail off, brow furrowing, "fuzzy. On the whole thing. The flavor of understanding, dynamics, and population skew tended to be dependant on the author's level of horny."

The did get a bit of a snort from the pretty one before you, the one in the back tilting his head just so as the pretty one spurred you on, "okay please don't take this the wrong way, you have given me nothing to go on but A/B/O and-" a finger was raised in question to that, you quickly explaining, "the fanfic shorthand for the universe without being a mouthful. Anyway- I've seen population numbers being roughly the same across the board, I've seen alphas and omegas at roughly 1% of the population of society on either end, I've seen alphas at about 5% and omegas at 1%- those ones are usually the most horny I swear.

"And it's all over the board, no consistency- sometimes it's betas are infertile, sometimes they're the straightman to the comedy that's an alpha and omega trying to woo each other without being too horny to function. Sometimes it's a sliding scale where being beta just means you're more the more middle-ground regulated hormonally with alphas and omegas being the opposing ends of a spectrum. Can you please say something and give me a fucking break because my panic rambles are probably like. Some kinda prejudiced. I'm still not over the 'I'm supposed to be a smear on the ground we don't even have dental images of to confirm who it is anymore' nugget you dropped on me. I think I'm doing well for this"

You would rather not tell them that as soon as you're out of this box of a room you were gonna be curled up in a ball and unabashedly weeping. That was none of their business.

The pretty one gave you what you're sure was supposed to be a reassuring smile but the quiet stretched just a bit too long. You looked from one to the other before leaning forward, "is this supposed to be soothing in some way? Because it's just a bit of an extended awkward silence and that's uh-"

It was the big one in the back's turn to give an amused snort, the pretty one looking bashful, "right, sorry, we uh-"

You jerk a bit, "wait, was that supposed to be some scent thing," you really didn't wanna say pheromones and potentially dig yourself into a deeper, more awkward hole based on Horny Pseudoscience.

Pretty rubbed the back of his neck, "something like that. You really couldn't smell anything?"

You know the exact Face you're making. It's very much your 'I have told you this and I'm getting tired of having to repeat it' face. You can tell he clocks it but for the record, because to your mortification this has to be recorded, you simply give a succinct, "no, I haven't smelled anything. Not from you, not from him," you jerk your head towards the big fucker, "and not from douchebag from be- Williams! His name was Williams. Nothing. Really had no clue why you were fanning the door when you came in."

You sigh, rubbing the heels of your palms into your eyes, "okay. Assuming I'm not about to be put into past tense a second time. Do we have any idea what popped me out here?"

The sentences are stilted, you know you're getting more rattled the longer you're here but sue you alright it's been the worst six hours of your life here.

They just continue to look at you, pretty keeping a polite almost customer service look as big one just stares unceasingly.

"Right. Okay. Am I going to be reintegrated to society or is this," you gesture around the little room as much as you can, "looking like my home for the foreseeable future."

No change in what you can see of either's expression, and you just sag. Deep breath in, deep breath out, "cool. Alright. Well. I know nothing of how biology is altered here, I'm not sure how that has impacted changes throughout history, and frankly I don't know what your pop culture has done. I'm assuming math and written languages are largely the same but in all fairness I don't know what I don't know."

You just stare quietly at the table for a bit longer before looking back at the two of them, "is there anything else you need because I can feel the freakout creeping up and while I know there's no real privacy, uh…"

The pretty one looked back to the big one, at some point you're sure you'll get some sort of names but for now? Now you watch the big one nod, the pretty one give you a polite smile and some vaguely polite bullshit your brain is swiftly going too far out to hear.

You only hope that whoever is behind the mirror is polite enough to look away as you put your head down on the table and give yourself the opportunity to, just this once, cry. As a treat.

[Next Chapter -> ]

[legomonkiefics]

🔥❤️ Red Son x GN Reader — Dating HCs ❤️🔥

Genre: Fluff, Romantic || he/she/they pronouns for Red Son, they/them pronouns for reader || No warnings needed

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁⋆˚｡⋆୨🔥୧⋆˚｡⋆✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖

- Has a hard time controlling the whole "peasants" thing at first. Tries to reassure you that you're not included in the term, but still throws it around to others at their leisure

- Tries very hard to do any impressive thing they can think of to make you praise him as a partner. Need something? She builds it for you! Going somewhere? He offers to drive you! Hungry? They'll cook for you!

- Very much leans into wanting to rule together with you if we're talking early seasons Red Son. Keeps offering you these dramatic roles in her plans screeched to you from wherever he's perched to dramatically pose to catch your attention

- If we're talking later seasons Red Son, he tries using food more to bond with you. As much as they hate to do it, they'll tone down the spice level for you. Soon you have lunches being slipped to you before you head out or a dinner she totally didn't make too much of on purpose and totally didn't plan to split with you

- Builds little trinkets for you. Jewlery, little fidget items, pins, whatever you might need. His plans keep getting interrupted thinking about you, so might as well tackle two problems at once

- Definitely offers to build you your own personal Bull Clone at some point to have a servant to do things for you

- Also has definitely offered to add multiple transformations to any vehicle you may own, or to add flaming jets to it

- Loves to parade you around and show you off. You're the great Flame Prince's partner! And you should be treated with respect! All others will bow before you!

- Easily gets flustered if you initiate affection. They always try to keep up the act of being proud and collected, but surprising them with gentle affecttion makes them lose their cool

- You're one of the only people she feels comfortable being vulnerable with. She'll be more willing to be honest with you if she's had a bad day, which means she isn't afraid to show her anger too. Luckily, your patience with her calms her down rather quickly

- Loves having coordinated outfits with you, especially if you pick something he suggested you wear

[stars-n-spice]

Things my family said after I forced them to watch the Bad Batch Clone Wars arc with me because it was my birthday:

This was the first time ever that my mom watched Bad Batch and did not ask me who Wrecker was or why I have a crush on him lmao

My mom: "Why do they age like that?" - "They white-washed the clones." - "Oh."

A clone would pop up on the screen and my sister would go, "Crosshair?" or like,, try and get their names right and then get all happy when I said she was correct

Tech spoke and my mom burst out laughing and looked right at me - "He seems very familiar."

"Crosshair has HAIR?!?" <- one of my sisters who has seen these episodes repeatedly because I always watch them

My brother asked if Rex was going through a breakup and if that's why he's blonde - then he asked "Oh, he's Anakin's bro though, right?" And when I confirmed it he was he went, "Oh, nvm. That makes sense." Which ???? Hello??

He ALSO asked if it was canon that Hunter was very hairy??? Because in his mind,, if he was really hairy that's why he has good senses - like how the hairs in our ear pick up sound or something??? And then said if he made fanart of Hunter he would make him very hairy. Which,, I completely approve of and want to see more of.

Every time one of the Bad Batch would do or say something one of my siblings (out of the four I have) would say something along the lines of - "Autism." Or "Oh my god they're so autistic." - They said this the most with Tech and Wrecker though, but Crosshair was a close third.

When Crosshair did that little shot with putting the Firepuncher on Tech's shoulder my sister was impressed - "Oh, that was smooth."

And then everyone made fun of Hunter for taking off on the grappling hook, firing at the Poletec and missing (My mom: "Yeah, shoot at it so it drops you a hundred feet from the ground, that's real smart"), and then fucking falling off of it

When Crosshair was goading Rex about Echo my mom was like "Why did he come if he's going to act like this?" And I told her, "He's a little bitch." And she burst out laughing.

Then when Rex, Crosshair, and Wrecker were fighting my dad was like "😧 so violent!"

My mom didn't believe Rex in thinking Echo was alive - she kept going, "I don't know..." and then they opened the stasis chamber and she was like "😮 omg he was right."

They all collectively felt bad for Echo after seeing him for the first time - "Oh, THAT'S why he looks like that 😦. That's inhumane." <- my sister who would make fun of him every time he saw him

He'd turn around or something and show off all the holes and they would flinch and cringe :(

Then my brother and sister started talking about accessorizing him and putting flowers and stuff in those holes :( which I thought was sweet

And my mom kept yelling at Tech to "UNPLUG HIM ALREADY!!!!"

My mom kept saying that someone needed to get Echo some pants - "Mom, I don't think they brought pants on the mission." - "So? Anakin has like three layers! He can give him some clothes!"

She also kept saying "me duele la cabeza" every time Echo touched his head

My sister called Hunter a "femboy" after he did his little head roll he does after taking out those droids - which,, uh,, okay?? sure I guess???

And my brother called either Crosshair or Hunter gay at one point for like,, no reason I mean,, obvious reasons but I cannot remember when or why he said that

They kept asking why they didn't get shot at all and kept giving the droids shit about being useless

My mom about Tech being like 🤓☝🏽: "Why does he do that? Does the finger do anything?? Does it get the information out faster??" - My brother: "It's his antenna." - My mom: *bursts out laughing*

every time Mace Windu was on the screen they would complain about his design - "Why'd they make him look like E.T?" <- my dad

They did not like Admiral Trench at all - thought he was gross

They thought Wrecker and Crosshair one upping each other was funny

Also also - My Mom: "Crosshair can shoot again?" <- she watched s3 with me (without seeing any prior bad batch episodes) - "Yeah, he doesn't have trauma yet." - "Oh."

"It must be so fun to be a part of a group with zero brain cells." <- my brother about the Bad Batch

It was funny because they'd ask questions of like "how" and "why" literally seconds before the characters themselves would ask the questions and then go like "THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING ANAKIN!!"

There was probably more shit they said but that's all I remember off the top of my head.

Also here are some things I noticed that I hadn't before:

Crosshair is a fucking DIVA. Holy shit?? It's so weird to go from s3 Crosshair to TCW s7 Crosshair because they feel like two different people. For some reason he seemed really young to me? Like I know that the Bad Batch are all technically supposed to be the same age and Crosshair is just the "youngest" but for some reason he REALLY seems like the youngest in TCW. Like to the point where he seems ACTUALLY a few years younger than the rest of them. Like if all of them are supposed to be 26(ish) he felt like he was 24 or something because he was being a little teenage brat like,, holy shit.

Like you have Hunter kinda acting like his interpreter and explaining his behavior and whatnot and then you have Wrecker who is always looking out for him and ready to square up and fight for him whenever Crosshair pushes buttons, and it just really makes it seem like Crosshair is truly the youngest. And not even like in terms of "coming out the tube last" or whatever, but like,, in a regular family dynamic he seemed a few years younger than the rest of them.

Idk if that makes sense,, but like,, he was acting like a teenage brat or something and it made him seem so much younger than he is??

After Rex gives the speech to the Poletec to convince them to join the fight, Crosshair goes "UGH" and Dee Bradley Baker put so much sass and disgust into it - I was fucking dying,, holy shit.

Also my mom and brother pointed out that Wrecker flips over the gunship with ONE hand and I wasn't able to function for a good while. Max.exe stopped working because I realized they were RIGHT and oh my god oh my god oh my god-

ALSO!! ECHO HAD EARS THIS ENTIRE TIME AND I THINK WE JUST COLLECTIVELY FORGOT??

I mean,, I say "we" but maybe it was just me - but like,, I remember when Echo took off his helmet in s3 when he was infiltrating Tantiss and everyone collectively lost their shit

BUT LIKE!! AFTER THEY RESCUE HIM AND HE HAS HIS LITTLE JUMPSUIT THINGY HE HAS HIS EARS!!

Idk - I think my family thought I was crazy because all of a sudden I started to shout "HE'S HAD EARS THIS WHOLE TIME?!?" in the middle of an episode

[snivyartjpeg]

what if we were raised together but also raised apart, unaware of each other until the day we meet and then- only then- do our lives begin to make sense?

more lore under the cut! (it's a lot)

The labs raised them in somewhat the same way- and both methods dehumanizing. Yuma solves a puzzle for a juice reward. Makoto solves a puzzle to avoid getting shocked. Both get shocked at the slightest display of disobedience anyway. Both have strict routines and regimes where every aspect of their lives seems set in stone. What the scientists didn't take into account was that raising a little genius in such conditions will eventually backfire.

They both escape their labs on the same day, shortly after they turn 20. They also name themselves Yuma and Makoto around this time, only being referred to beforehand as "Subject No. 01" and "Subject No. 02." These escapes simultaneously piss off the researchers but also fascinate them- how much of their identical choices were made based on nature vs nurture?

For the first month traveling alone, Yuma spent his time trying and failing to do everything alone. He eventually receives the help of a stranger and starts helping random people, learning he'll receive kindness in return.

Makoto spent his lonesome travels scraping by and barely surviving without the assistance of anyone else. He's still bitter and angry about what the scientists have done to him. He regrets not burning the whole institution to the ground.

They both meet at a bar, where they, of course, instantly recognize each other's faces as their own. After a lot of guarded questions, they learn that they were both cursed with the same upbringing.

So Makoto asks Yuma to help him return to the Amaterasu lab and exact revenge.

Yuma doesn't wanna hurt anyone, but agrees to come along... with ulterior motives! He wants to show Makoto that this world isn't so bad, and dwelling on getting revenge isn't everything. Think like the core relationship in Mad Rat Dead, between Heart and Mad Rat.

And why is Yuma so stuck on this pacifist philosophy? Well, he'd already gotten his revenge. Turns out, putting a bullet into the head researcher who raised him only made him feel hollow and scared. He doesn't want Makoto to go through the same thing.

They meet the other cast members on the way, doing odd jobs and favors for them and forging small bonds with all the strangers they meet. They help Halara, a pet rescue volunteer, get a cat down from a tree and in return Halara teaches them a few survival skills. The meet Fubuki, who is lost in the supermarket, but it's also their first time in the supermarket so they all end up going on an "adventure" together until the clones escort her back to her limo. She tips them a fat wad of cash that keeps them fed and housed in hotels for like 3 months. They help Desuhiko, an up and coming music star who's anxious about getting on stage. The decide to do an opening act as a comedy duo- Makoto and Yuma are familiar with street performing for money after all- and it not only has the audience in a good mood but eases Desuhiko's anxieties. The clones see their first concert together and it's the most fun theyve ever had. Desuhiko, in return, patches up their clothes for them (though, they do end up messing the clothes up again later, lol) with his impressive sewing skills. They save Yakou from getting beat down by some debt collectors and Yakou lets them crash in his shitty little apartment for a while.

This is really just a really endearing and cute road trip story in my head. It starts off tragic but once they get out it's just two guys who only understand each other trying to explore a whole new world while making other lives better.

They eventually reach the Amaterasu lab again, but by that point, Makoto doesn't have it in him to exact revenge anymore. He hates the place, but it was still his home. It's complicated. He tells Yuma that all he wants to do now is keep traveling the world together.

That's when Yuma reveals he's been secretly planning with the other people they've helped together to expose the laboratory for the corrupt place it is and get it shut down. That way they can get their revenge the right way. Makoto is ecstatic.

After they expose the dirt on their respective labs and have those places shut down, they're free to travel together again and continue helping any random people they see who need it <3

if anyone has any questiosn abt this au ill gladly answer bc it's rotting my brain <3

[stinkysam]

Buggy the Clown - Me ! Me ! Me !

Warning : nsfw-ish

Genre : fluff

Synopsis : "ooh maybe buggy with a shapeshifter partner who likes to turn into him?" - anon

Reader : male (he/you)

A/N : Bon Clay already has that devil fruit so I changed it a bit. You can steal abilities, and the last person you stole them from is… Bon Clay !

When he first heard of your abilities Buggy was impressed. Like, that's really fucking cool !?

You told him about the last devil fruit user you met, Bon Clay and how you had his abilities now.

His first thought was that you could easily pass up as a marine. And if he had met you earlier, he would've had you steal Axe-Hand Morgan's face to take the Grand Line map.

What he didn't expect though, was for you to turn into him. And seeing himself move on your -his ?- own, was a really bizarre thing to witness.

Oh, he's definitely going to use it for his circus tricks.

But he's also going to stare at himself under all angles. Are you sure you got the height right ? And why is the nose so…

Yeah, stop him when he gets to the face because he's definitely going to obsess over his nose, his insecurities getting the best of him.

Because if you don't stop him he'll think you're doing it to mock him at some point and once it gets in his head you'll have trouble making him think something else.

Because there's no way in hell you just like being him. He refuses to believe that.

He likes to make people believe he's so confident and oh, so sexy and perfect he'd fuck himself if he had a clone. Because who wouldn't fuck him, right ?

And now he has the occasion !

Well, it won't happen.

"Why not ?" You ask, crossing your arms with a pout, trying to hide your smile.

"Are you out of your mind ! This is so weird !

"You said it yourself, yo-"

"I know what I said !"

"And ?"

"No ! It's- Why you- Gah !" He stammers, embarrassed you remembered that.

What he doesn't say is that his self-loathing is that strong. And he would find it incredibly awkward to hear his own voice moan or see his own face contorts in pleasure.

Nope, not even to cuddle. It's too weird, if you want him to hug himself so bad he can do it without you.

"Stop it ! This isn't funny !" He yells as he let go of you, who just turned into him.

"But you should love it ! It's yourself !"

"I'd rather hug myself alone then, get out of bed !" He says, now pushing you out. "Get out ! Out ! Out ! Out !"

"Nooo." You turn into your original form and try to get back into bed but he's still pushing you away.

"Get out ! This is a private moment between me and myself, [Name]."

"Well then," You turn back into him. "I'll get my own cuddles." You begin to leave and you stop by the door. "Maybe I'll even masturbate." You say with a wink before running away, laughing.

"No ! This is a violation ! [Name] ! Come back here !" He yells as he jumps out of bed and run after you. "You brat !"

The crew wakes up from the ruckus and find two Buggys running and throwing things at each other.

"Stop him !"

"No, stop him, I'm the really Buggy !"

"He's not ! I'm your captain, recognize me immediately !"

"If you obey him, you're dead ! Stop him !"

No one knows what to do until his hands flies to you, finally an indication of who's the real Buggy.

"You fucking cheater !"

[here-comes-the-moose]

Some More of my Bad Batch Headcanons Under the Cut

Because of his enhanced vision, Crosshair used to get sick from Tech’s flying. He’s mostly fine now, but it can happen if things get really rough.

Crosshair and Hunter get migraines. Crosshair’s affect his vision more, whereas Hunter’s affect his hearing more. Both are sensitive to smells.

Crosshair had a huge crush on General Skywalker. His brothers teased him about it.

Tech made Crosshair a special eye mask for his migraines.

Hunter feels like he always has to be strong for his younger siblings, so is only able to fully open up to Echo.

Changes in air pressure really mess with Hunter’s ears.

Tech made him some special ear plugs, both for the air pressure thing and for his migraines.

Crosshair is the youngest, and the others never let him forget it.

Crosshair is actually the most sensitive member of the batch.

Omega looks just like Crosshair as a kid.

Crosshair is a natural blond like Omega , he just bleaches his hair for the silver/platinum look.

Crosshair had a very baby face for most of his cadet years and when they were first deployed. I’m talking round face, chubby cheeks, the works. When he would glare at people, no one could take him seriously.

On that note, the Batch were deployed at an earlier age than most clones are, and still looked quite young when they first entered the war. People were confused by the extremely high success rate of these baby-faced enhanced clones.

This led to Cody adopting them right on the spot, of course.

Crosshair was the one who suggested that Echo come with them and be part of their squad.

Crosshair actually listens to Echo (most of the time). Hunter is extremely impressed by Echo’s ability to get his younger brother to behave with just a single look.

Omega is the only one with a 100% success rate in getting Crosshair out of bed during a depressive episode.

Everyone knows that Crosshair and Wrecker team up to cause shenanigans™️, but the real danger comes when Crosshair and Tech team up to cause trouble. If the two of them are suspiciously quiet and haven’t been seen in a while, Hunter has alarm bells going off in his head.

Seeing Tech and Crosshair together reminds Echo so much of himself and Fives when they were in the 501st.

Echo knew Crosshair and Tech were twins before anyone even told him.

Crosshair was one of those kids who held his breath until he got his way.

He was also one of those kids who would cry to the point of throwing up.

Omega is used by her brothers (mainly Crosshair or Wrecker) to convince everyone to get a treat or to have dessert before dinner.

Echo is always the first choice to be on the aux.

All of them were completely devastated after Wrecker’s injury, but showed it in different ways. Hunter became more withdrawn but also became extremely overprotective of his brothers after and continued to have nightmares of both the incident but also other instances in which his brothers could get hurt. Tech could not sleep and kept running over what had happened to see if he could have done anything differently or better to have prevented it from happening (he couldn’t have and that makes it worse in his mind). Crosshair could not stop crying and absolutely refused to leave Wrecker’s side to the point where the medics gave up on trying to remove or sedate him.

Wrecker used to be in charge of their meals before Echo came to live with them. Now they split the responsibility (not completely 50/50 though since they all prefer Echo’s cooking).

They used to eat like a bunch of college guys before Echo came to live with them.

Crosshair gets sick really easily.

Hunter pretty much never gets sick, but he does have really bad allergies.

Tech is a slutty drunk.

Hunter cannot sing for shit.

Hunter is permanently banned from cooking after not only setting the kitchen on fire, but also undercooking and burning the food and giving his brothers the worst food poisoning. This was all from the same incident.

Omega regularly calls her brothers (minus Echo) stinky.

She started this after hearing Echo calling them stinky.

Wrecker LOVES listening to space Kesha and space Katy Perry.

Wrecker only drinks fruity drinks. If it doesn’t taste like juice and have a little garnish, he doesn’t want it.

The only exception to this is beer.

Omega keeps her brothers humble. It’s actually her duty as a little sister. She once called Crosshair stinky and old on the same day.

Tech is the main one who can understand Crosshair when he gets into one of his moods. He is also the one who is able to explain what’s going on to the rest of the batch.

Feel free to add more! I love hearing everyone’s headcanons 😊 I will also be posting more this is a threat

[gaeasun]

Cut Lawquane was absolutely a Commando

Ok, crazy theory time.

I think Cut Lawquane was a Commando, or least a Commander. But going with Commando for now. But I don't think he was a rank and file clone trooper.

All of the clone troopers i think should be shown as exceptionally trained, but Cut Lawquane showed incredible skill, even though we saw him compared to Rex the entire episode. Evidences are below:

A) Rex is both a Captain and one of the oldest of the CT's, but the entire time Cut acts as his equal and perhaps even elder. He doesn't talk quite down to Rex, but it reminds me of how people act when they're just a grade apart. Not like they know everything and the other knows nothing, but there is a definite difference between them. Also he instinctively recognizes Rex as a Captain, but is not phased by that at all.

B) He disables Rex, the Captain Rex, with a farming tool in zero seconds flat, and does it without hurting him.

C) He recognizes Commando droids, which are typically only used in special assignments. And he also knows that it takes a headshot to pierce their armor. On Rishi it was Captain Rex who recognized them and said they were brand new. So for Cut to already know exactly what they are, especially when he's been out of the war for months, at least implies he could have been on high stakes missions before right in the beginning of the war. Which is also why I'm leaning Commando instead of Commander, because it's more Commandos who go on missions while Commanders are still often with general forces.

D) He has a highly developed sense of individuality and creative thinking, which was encouraged more in the special forces than general troopers.

E) Cut also says, specifically, "everyone I cared about, my team, was gone." Commandos are specifically trained to work in groups of four as a cohesive team. additionally, with these commando units being so tightly knit, the feelings of complete loss could have played a large role in Cut's desertion.

F) Cut and Rex play a game of dejarik, and while the winner is not shown, by the end they're both down to the last piece, which shows that Cut is around Rex's level when it comes to strategy. And Rex is so good at strategy that Marshall Commander Cody, who the commanding officer of around 36,000 men, considered Rex to be one of the best they had in that regard. Not to mention that Cut is impressed with Rex too.

G) Cut has 3 blaster type weapons that are probably the weapons he had on him when he deserted: an older rifle, a blaster carbine, and a DC-17. Now, it makes sense for a farmer to own a rifle, and the blaster carbine is a general GAR blaster. but the DC-17 is the same blaster pistol that Rex uses, that we have only seen used by ARC Troopers, Captains, and Commanders.

H) This is probably the most obvious one of all, but Cut is an incredibly good fighter. Even our beloved ARC troopers Fives and Echo struggle to take on a few. Cut takes on 20 and lives (granted the droids are not top form but its still impressive). He makes three headshots in a row with his rifle in less than three seconds, and the next three kill shots are all headshots as well. he also throws a wooden rafter-beam off him (that might be dad-strength tho) and hits a metal droid with a wooden chair hard enough to break both of them. he also punched one of them in the face hard enough the droids eyes flashed red (and then slightly regretted it, but it didn't look like he broke his hand either).

I) Cut hadn't been fighting for at least several months, since he deserted almost right after Geonosis. so as incredible as his skills are, he had probably been even better before, so just think about that for a moment.

Edit: i forgot to put this in because it wasnt in The Deserter, but by bad batch he already has gray streaks and a receding hairline. guys an old teenager for sure

So, Cut is a highly trained and skilled fighter in both hand to hand combat and blaster combat, he's at least as old as Rex and is not intimidated by his rank at all, he was in a specific team and felt like everything had no meaning after they all died, he has the weapons of an officer, had seen enough of commando droids to recognize them and their weaknesses, is Rex's match in strategy and combat while being more independent.

All of this points to Cut being anything but a regular CT, and as far as I'm concerned he was absolutely a Commando.

[fatuismooches]

Op you have feed me (The recent soft Dottore anon) and now you are stuck with me so I offer you Dottore head canons for the soul! He is suspicious when you seem to show genuine interest in his work. No one else in the fatui really has the guts to handle the work he does so it's usually just him and the clones and everyone is terrified of him so when you just treat him like a normal person and express a fascination with his job he does a double take and just mentally makes a note to rummage through your past to see what it is your trying to use him for . . . And he does and it turns up Nothing so he keeps an eye on you which leads to him having you help out in the lab more and he just slowly is like yeah this one's mine now I guess

I have more thoughts for him as well as other harbingers but those are for Not NowTM

RARE NON-AKADEMIYA READER WITH DOTTORE POST.

Contrary to popular belief, Dottore isn't that bad to work under. He knows how to reward efforts and work, and agents who never thought a Harbinger would bat an eye at them have been rewarded by him in some way, if they manage to impress him of course. If one gets stuck with the younger segments, they can be more difficult to work with, but they still give credit where credit is due.

However, Dottore has never quite met someone like you, in all his centuries of living. He's seen countless Fatuis of many characters come and go in his lab, but none have left an impression on him like you have. There are the ones who are too scared to talk to him, and then the ones who somehow revere and admire him, but no one talks to him like you do. You're just... different, in a good and bad way. Good because finally, someone speaks to him without holding back, for the greatest minds can only be nurtured if you ask questions without fearing the consequences. Bad because he doesn't know what to do when he finds himself enjoying your company instead of keeping it strictly professional.

A part of Dottore tries to push you away, but it doesn't work much when you're one of the only competent people around to help him, so much of your conversation with him grows to be quick and almost snappy. And yet you continue to be kind and interested in his work. He doesn't know whether you're oblivious or hard-headed or- whatever it is, he doesn't know whether it's a strength or weakness either. Not to mention, you're also interested in his other segments' work - ruin machines and mechanics and biology and whatever other areas his segments specialize in. It's really odd and he tries to convince himself that you're annoying, and yet he can't help but be a bit... pleased.

Among all his segments, despite their differences and bickering, the one thing they have in common is their desire to be accepted, to be understood, and yet also how they deny that feeling to the best of their abilities. None of them know how to love, how to treat another softly, and that won't change for you. Yet.

Needless to say, you won't give up. And you won't let Dottore- no, Zandik give up either.

[signedeclipse]

Hello, it's me again! 🫣 I loved your headcanons about the blind reader! Especially the ones with Hantengu. 😊

This time I would like to request headcanons for Hantengu, Gyokko and Douma with a reader who has a chronic disease. I know this is a serious subject but it's very close to my heart because I suffer from one. I wondered how the demons would react to a partner who has chronic pain and often feels sick. They feel frustrated with themselves and get angry when they can't do certain things because of their illness. I can imagine that they envy the demons for their strength and health and have thought about becoming a demon themselves. They sometimes push themselves too much because they want to keep up with their demonic partner. But when their illness isn't flaring up, they always want to be as active as possible and be close to their partner.

Thank you in advance! Hope you have a wonderful day! (⁠✿⁠^⁠‿⁠^⁠)

Douma | Gyokko | Hantengu [X Reader]

In which their s/o is struggling with their chronic pain and tries to push it aside.

Douma

He was always glad that the cold climate you had living with him helped, since for many it was more harmful than helpful

He was familiar with the idea that coolness helped inflammation and helped your body regulate, but he also had to make sure you weren't overdoing it and getting yourself sick

Douma can almost feel your guilt whenever he steps in, so he does his best to remind you in ways that seem less like him telling you

'Can you warm my jacket for me?'

'Could you get the fire started and watch over it until I get back?'

While it may feel good, it makes you more prone to staying out too long and medicine can be hard to get his hands on during certain times

The worst part for him is being so high ranked, because he knows you know of his strength

Will hide it and down play it all the time in hopes you stop thinking about it so often

How impressive could it be if it hurts his favourite human?

Douma would like you to join him in being a demon someday, but he hopes its because you want to be with him as opposed to because you want to escape yourself

Gyokko

His poison art was actually inspired by the fact that he produces a lot of antidotes for some of your more physical ailments to help soothe the feeling

Think aloe vera but so much better

Might even say you can only get it if you hug him so he can produce it where you touch him, but he won't force it if it's really bad and you just want to rest

He has fought in front of you before, so you've seen his regenerative capabilities and the ways he bounces back in seconds, its honestly irritating at times

If only you could sprout a new immune system, or some new joints

Gyokko insists that it's painful and more excruciating than it seems, but he's kind of lying just because he doesn;t want you to feel so inclined to demonise

He makes mini pots for the medicines and salves he learns to make with cork lids so you can use them when you need

Your own personal pharmacist but so so so much better

Hentengu

He's always found himself to be extremely weak and unlucky

But you manage to be so much more unfortunate than him, so he worries for and cries for you more than he does himself

You were so kind to love him, and yet the world cursed you terribly? It's so unfair

Worries that you could die anytime from your ailments even if you tell him that isn't how it works, so he prefers to remain in a range of you to which he can hear your breathing or heart rate

The clones are more than happy to keep you in shape, but Sekido especially keeps you from trying to match them in any way shape or form

"It's ridiculous to expect results like this as a human, we have lived for centuries you haven't."

Whenever you feel light headed or need fresh air Urogi will take you for a little flight, usually by a body of water such as the ocean to enjoy the best air possible

Karaku just jokes that he has enough muscle for the both of you so you'd be greedy to get even more muscular, I mean, leave some for the rest of the clones!

Hates the idea of turning you into a demon but any day if its really bad and you are in enough agony he would do it just to see you smile again

Authors Note - Originally I wasn't planning to do this request because I don't suffer from any chronic pain, but a friend of mine who does decided to beta read so here we are! I hope these can help in some way, wishing you the best <3

[cryptocism]

So, out of curiosity (AND a slight fear of messing with what you've laid out so clearly in Frequency, which I see as the most reasonable and rational explanation to Thad's character inconsistencies basically, ever), I am wondering if this version of Inertia from Flash #760 fits into the Too Many Thads AU anywhere? From what I can tell, he's the only one not mentioned in your very thorough (and impressively detailed, he was at boomerang's funeral, excuse me sir why are you here???) timeline of Thad appearances. Would you consider him one of the clones we get from the AU, like Six? Or maybe just Thad himself given he's sort of just... chilling in the Speedforce lol. Or did you just not consider him given it's yet another instance of Thad appearing, doing something wild, then disappearing as quickly as he came haha. (Also, I just noticed he says vibrational FREQUENCY, nice👏)

i did... kinda include this iteration. but admittedly it's pretty brief, and the bits of story that take place in the speed force sit in dreamy abstraction rather than solid prose

start of chapter 2 when Thad is running thru the speed force:

He thinks he sees the Flash, once or twice. Tick tock tick tock. You’re running out of time, Barry. But he often thinks he sees lots of people. Once, he thought he saw Max. But the memories exist in his mind the same way a daydream would, and he can’t be sure if it was real.

The "tick tock tick tock" line is taken directly from #760

compared to the other threads of canon that Frequency is written around, it's definitely more on the borders of believably. The "tick tock" line and the bit where Thad threatens to snap his fingers and "blast Barry's mind to pieces" harkens back to the Kid Zoom era and Rogues Revenge, which fucks with my attempt to differentiate this Inertia as a separate person from Kid Zoom. but the hiccup feels minor enough that i think it still works

(and on a tangential note the whole "i'll snap my fingers and blast your mind to pieces" line straight up doesn't make sense to me because YES Kid Zoom famously snapped his fingers and exploded a baby, but he accomplished that by fast-forwarding that baby's timeline so quick that its literal molecules shook apart under the stress. Barry is a speedster and would not respond to timeline manipulation in that way - if at all - because his molecules are already used to that kind of shit. it's a weird and out of place threat to make and i think Williamson may have gotten the impression that Kid Zoom acquired the power of spontaneous combustion which he Fucking Did Not ok rant over)

the general idea i was going for was: Thad is running on rage, sees Barry, has the brief confrontation in #760 where Barry mostly just feels bad for him, and then disappears back into the storm. Implication being that Thad has actually had a couple different interactions with people during his 5 years in the speed force (Eobard, Max, Barry, etc) who try to convince him of things or promise him things, but staying for that long in the speed force (without being dead) fucks with perception a little bit, especially perceptions of Time. so when he's out and looking back on it, Thad can't totally discern what happened, what didn't, or in what order.

also the attendance at Captain Boomerang's funeral gets a shout out near the end of chapter 8 when Bart is going through Six's collection of Four's old stuff:

Some of the items on the shelf he didn’t recognize. A shot glass. A funeral pamphlet for one Digger Harkness. Several empty syringes and auto-injectors all meticulously arranged. A variety of small gadgets and devices that Bart couldn’t place.

because the funeral is technically Inertia's return after the events of Mercury Falling, I translated that as Four's first appearance in the 21st century