#also gimme gimme ibuprofen

[lynxgirlpaws]

Oughhhh I'm need pettsss I'm need scritchies behind my ear ouhhhh I'm need back massage ohbbbb ibuprofennnn

[slutforwings]

listen. youre all coming on this 'adulting' (throws up) journey with me. i bought an apartment and immediately got chronic back pain. the universe disregarded the fact that im only 23 n was like. you think youre ready to be a Full Adult on your Own? back pain be upon ye.

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

hugging u sososo tightly like a weighted blanket mac ily.. i hope the shitty emotions pass soon & u get good sleep tonight <3 + also... speaking of artfight oh my GOD. im so excited to draw ur guys for it u have no idea!!! still mad i didn't get to last year but... this year.... >:333

AUGH I DIDNT SEE THIS YESTDERDAY hiiiiiii ros hiii my friend sollux roswell ilysm <333 DO YOU HAVE AN ARTFIGHT PROFILE?!?!? I NEED 2 FOLLOW U WHADDA HELL. are u gonna pick a team or get random-sorted this year 👀👀👀 i know which one I'm gonna pick so if we get opposites I'm gonna attack u soooomuch. killa you. attacka you with rock (<< the rock is pictures of ur ocs)

[alisblackgf]

hello lovely, hope all's good! May I request Hobie period comfort? Reader's started their period and is NOT felling good at all. They're just nauseous, have a horrible headache, back pain, boob pain, cramps, a slight fever (I get period fevers), and the list goes on. And he's feeling real bad for lovely? He comforts her, makes her favorite snacks, reads aloud to her so that she can nap.

If you get to this, thanks a bunch!!

(honey anon)

YES YES SURE OF COUrse! (thanks for requesting honey anon i hope to see you more in the future!!)

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: hobie brown x afab!reader

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: fluff :)

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: hobie takes care of reader during their period!

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: writing about this man isn’t enough i need to inhale him (i didn’t know if you wanted headcanons or a fic so i did a little bit of both!) also i tried to write him in his accent but it is so HARD and it looks kinda dumb so excuse that

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: the sickness section may trigger emetophobia (fear of vomit), viewer discretion is advised!

𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐬

if you two just started dating, he’d ask you the basic questions.

such as: what size pads, favorite candies, what you want him to do, etc.

but as time goes on, he’s on top of everything.

he remembers all of your preferences and favorites.

he’s fine with you being grumpy, he has a lot of patience for you and will do whatever you need him to.

“go away, hobie,” you groan.

“sorry, love, ‘m not goin’ anywhere.”

“my insides feel like they’re collapsing,” you complain, hugging your stomach and curling into fetal position.

“i know, doll. li’l ol’ hobie’s here to fetch whatever your heart desires.”

“li’l ol’ hobie?” you laugh, forgetting your grumpiness for a second, which makes him smile.

he did mean what he said, though. he will get you anything.

if you like being read to sleep, he’ll get an assortment of books that you like.

he’ll read them to you at your very request! just say the words.

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐧

if you’re experiencing pain, just tell him where and he’ll massage the area for you.

if your chest is too tender to massage, he’ll just cuddle you and rub circles into your back.

however, if your pain is intense, he’ll go out and grab you some pain killers.

he’ll even buy you a heating pad should you need it (you probably do).

“(y/n), ‘m back. got you some stuff, too.”

“really?”

“yeah, got you some ibuprofen and a heatin’ pad.”

he loves taking care of you and he loves that you let him.

he’ll probably even say some stupid jokes to make you laugh (and they’re probably not funny).

his reasoning is “laughter is the best medicine”.

if you don’t laugh, though, he’ll tickle you.

so laugh.

𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬

if you get fevers, he’ll wet a rag with cold water, fold it, and put it on your forehead.

he gets you fever medication, mainly tylenol because he assumes you wouldn’t like the taste of the liquid medicine.

if you feel nauseous, he’s there rubbing your back and comforting you.

he tells you to let him know if you’re going to vomit so he can accompany you.

if you do end up vomiting, though, he’s right there with you.

if you have long/medium-length hair, he holds your hair back as you do your business into the toilet.

if you have short hair, he rubs your back.

whatever length hair you may have, he praises you.

“there you go, dove, let it all out,” he coos.

when you’re done, he gives you a cup of water.

𝐛𝐨𝐧𝐮𝐬!

it’s nighttime, and hobie was urging you to sleep. even though your body was practically wrapped around him (which was usually all you needed to fall asleep), the pain kept you awake. you were already facing him, looking over the features you adored so much. he was resting peacefully, you really didn’t want to wake him up, but you really couldn’t sleep.

“hobie?” you asked, attempting to wake him up.

“mm, yeah, love?” he mumbled, half-awake. he was so cute you could almost laugh.

“sorry to wake you, but could you read me to sleep?”

“mhm,” he responds. “gimme a sec.”

his willingness to do what you asked without questioning it made butterflies swarm in your stomach. he groggily got up to go retrieve a book.

“want anythin’ in particular?” he asks you.

“no, surprise me.”

he nods and picks one out.

he sits down on the edge of the bed as you get snuggled back under the covers. as he begins to read, you find yourself more relaxed than ever. hobie must’ve loved you to death with the way he was caring for you, so you made sure to let him know you felt the same.

“i love you, hobie.”

he stopped reading and looked at you. your eyes were already closed and your breathing steady. he smiled at your resting figure.

“i love you too.”

UGH i love him

tags: @pr0wlerpunk

[tsumtsumrry]

hi babe!!! love your work so much:))) on your old blog I think you had a blurb ab h helping reader through her period. do you still have it?? hope you’re having a great day love<3

hii. thank you so so much 🤍🤍 my day is going really great thank you and i hope yours is amazing too!! and yes of course. here you go 🤍

more of a blurb than anything (1.0k words)

there's subspace involved and a daddy kink.

She woke up in the middle of the night squirming around, pressing onto her stomach in hopes of deadening the pain radiating through her body. She was whining and whimpering softly, trying her best not to wake Harry but also wanting him to be awake so he can make her feel better.

The pain is just becoming too much, those damn ibuprofens aren’t doing anything to help her and she hasn’t been able to go out and buy any Motrin ― which is her only saving grace when it comes to period pains ― she just can’t take it any more.

“Baby?” she jumps when she hears Harry, his deep raspy sleep-filled voice already making her feel a little better.

He moves behind him to turn on the lamp and looks back to her.

“Hurts…” is all she whimpers before Harry is raising his eyebrows, both at her saying she’s in pain and the tone of her voice.

“What hurts, love? Gotta tell me” he looks down at her hand kneading her stomach and puts his hand on top of hers adding extra pressure making her moan softly, “s’here, pretty? Hmm?”

She nods and whimpers while Harry kneads her tummy with his strong big hands. She opens her eyes slightly to look over at him, he’s got his eyebrows furrowed with concentrated eyes, staring at his hand kneading her abdomen like he’s giving everything he has into it. The somewhat stern expression on his face and how he’s taking such good care of her is pushing her further into that subby mood she fell in when she woke up.

“I hate when you’re in pain, baby love.” He brings his other hand up to softly caress her cheek.

All these nicknames and affection is really not helping her situation, with every knead to her belly, soft touch, and affectionate whisper she feels herself being pushed deeper and deeper into that mood where she just wants to be taken care of.

Harry has been anticipating it. He knows she usually goes under when she’s on her period, he’s surprised it hasn't happened sooner. He loves it though, when all his gorgeous girl wants is to be taken care of.

“You’re slipping aren’t you, pretty girl?” he says softly, looking her in the eyes and seeing that usual doe eyed glint she gets in them when she’s like this.

She just nods and moves to nuzzle her head into his neck but he stops her softly. She whimpers and he pouts, feeling sorry for her.

“Don’t you want me to go get you some pain medicine, baby?”

“Just wanna cuddle, daddy. Please.” She whines.

She’s really slipping.

“Hey, hey. It’s okay, sweet girl. I’ll cuddle you.”

She’s mumbling nonsensical words and Harry is absentmindedly smiling at every mutter that comes out of her perfect lips, that he’s dying to kiss.

“Want a kiss, pet. Gimme a kiss.” he says softly and she moves her head from being tucked safely under his neck to position her lips in front of his. He puckers them slightly as they’re leaning in, wanting so badly to kiss his girl.

He takes control of this kiss, kissing her slow and sensual, moaning faintly into it every so often, when she comes up for air his head tries to reach for her lips barely even aware he’s doing it.

“Baby love?” Harry whispers, his face still in front of hers and his eyes still closed gently.

“Daddy?”

He opens his eyes when she says this, trying his best to read her expression, or try to get a grip on where her head is at.

“S’Harry, baby.” he corrects, but she just stares at him, blinking, “does it still hurt, my love?”

She nods meekly and tries to tuck her head back into the safe haven of his neck but he stops her for the second time tonight.

She whines dramatically and pouts at him.

“S'ok, pretty girl. Just wanna ask you something.”

“Hmm, daddy?”

“Harry. It’s Harry, my sweet girl.” he corrects but he knows it’s no use, she’s going to be like this for a while and it’s not that he has any problem with it, (he loves when she’s like this) he just wants to make sure she’s aware of everything that’s going on. It’s important that she feels safe.

“Would you be alright if I go down to the store and get you something for the pain, love? It’ll only be for a little bit.” he says, his hands cupping her face and softly rubbing her cheeks.

“Don’t wanna be by myself, daddy.” she grumbles and he frowns.

“Harry.” he corrects again.

“Hmm?” she hums.

“It’s Harry, pretty. And I’m only gonna be gone for a little bit. If you need me you can call me, right?”

“I want cuddles, H.”

H? We’re getting somewhere, he thinks.

“We can cuddle when I get back and it’ll be even better cause you won’t be in so much pain anymore, my love. That sound good to you?”

“Cuddles sound good to me.” She grumbles in annoyance and even though Harry can tell she’s a bit cross with him at the moment he smiles.

“There’s my girl.” he says softly. She's slowly coming back to him.

“Good? M’good right?”

“Always good. My sweet, perfect, pretty, good girl.” he says with a smile and it’s almost like Harry can feel the heat rise to her cheeks on his palm.

He slowly gets up and detaches herself from her getting dressed to quickly go get something that’ll take his girl out of her misery. She whines and pouts but soon figures out that he comes back just as quick as he left.

“M’back, angel. Got you some Motrin and a glass of water. Drink up. Want you to feel better.”

She takes the pills and slowly drinks the water all while Harry is attentively watching her, wiping some of the water that dripped down her chin.

“Good girl. You should feel better soon, kay?”

“Can I please have cuddles now?” She grumbles with a pout and Harry mocks her expression for a second before his lips break into a smile.

“‘Course you can, baby love.”

Harry doesn’t think anyone could possibly be as adorable as his girl is.

[fuckyeah-dragrace]

Gimme some sweet Bryvie headcanons from that dance school AU fic you wrote a while ago!!

of course my spouse!!!

Brooke always forgets to eat on long days of rehearsing so Yvie has to yank Brooke out of the dance room and make her take a break and eat which she complains about it but stops when Yvie offers her cuddles

Brooke always has Tylenol or ibuprofen packed in her bag when she can tell Yvies having a rough and when she has a break from class she plays nurse

Yvie has also become a very big fan of Brookes massages, saying they help a lot with her pain but she just likes Brooke touching her

When Brooke gets picked for her first solo, Yvie is sitting in the front row with a big bouquet of flowers and a bright smile for her

Backstage before shows they always make an effort to find each other to give a hug and kiss for good luck and to help shake off the nerves before they go out

It’s the same thing when they get off stage too at the end of a show, a hug and kiss telling them how proud they are of each other and ice cream afterwards at eithers apartment for cuddles

They are both jacket/sweater thieves but are SO in denial about which humors everyone but them

[ultimatebottom69]

So yeah I opened my heel. Nothing major. I just wanted to talk about my funny ass reaction to pain.

For the first 10 minutes ? Oh it be hurting. I am feeling it. I am panicking because there is so much blood around and I will have yo wash it up at some point.

Next 5 hours ? It stings. It's fine. We can live. Walking ? Ok sure we can. Yeah. We good.

After the 5 hours ? Would you like to feel like the wound is being re-opened freshly for the next let's say "Gimme pain killer bitch" hour for 3 ? I hope you have enough pain killers to paralyze a horse bitch because now it will burn, sting and will feel uncomfortable no matter the angle you leave it be. Did I mention your leg will feel like ants ? Oopsie.

So yeah O have been heavy breathing so hard rn.

The emergency room didn't give me a "Don't go to work you slave" paper so I hace to get up and find a doctor to do it.

Many will go "But Bottom. You are an accountant. You don't need to get up that much you will be fine."

And my answer will be : "I need to crawl to the bathroom like a dog to avoid pain on my leg, i have to watch out for angles and such because the wound is left-sided and center. When I just sit down it burns, when I am laying down it burns less. I am not getting up in 3 hours with the same pain for some guy's money."

Also I am paid like only 700 € per month for 35h/week.

And you telling me as I lay down waiting on the Doliprane (European Ibuprofen basically) to take effect to go for it ?

Now I know I am not the smartest bitch in the room when it comes to money but there is a limit to the grindset.

Did I mention they had to cut me up and embroiderie the wound ? I have like 10 of them suture points and had to be needle like 17 times becquse the anesthesia didn't want to enter my heel.

[crocoguile]

Does anyone have a link to that post about give your cat treats when you take meds because then THEY WILL BE YOUR ALARM?

So I have three cats in my house and also there's a husky. See, I have started doing this and for added measure, I take my meds when our oldest takes his, and for further measure I shake the meds boxes and then the treat jar.

Thing is the husky gets FOMO with anything the cats get to do, and fifty pounds plus the collective 30ish (give or take a pound collectively) pounds of cat mean I get rushed by something about the size of my nine year old every time i handle the meds.

Just 80 pounds of fur.

this is especially funny because the nine year old loves giving treats so while he's chewing his gummy multivitamins he loves to do the honor of the morning treats.

This morning i slept through most of him getting ready for school because I've been up holding vigil on a toddler with a fever and dehydration, getting him back to level. So I took my meds a little later, shook the box out of habit, already had the treats open with one hand while i was cracking open my can of sodiepop.

NOT FIVE MINUTES LATER my husband had 80 pounds of GIMME fly up his butthole because he came in for the acetaminophen/ibuprofen combo and something caffeinated cause one of his teeth is bugging him.

He also discovered that I have been secretly training the oldest cat to say our names (husband didn't go for the treats so McNugget came running to me shouting "PAPA PAPA PAPA").

I love these furry dumbasses :D

[ebonyheartnet]

Just screaming in the tags to stay sane, and like, warning for TMI medical shit, as well as me being in a foul mood. Do yourself a favor and just skip this one, because damn do I wish I could.

[actualbird]

ASHDHAJAJA YES ABSOLUTELY THATS EXACTLY HOW IT GOES theyre all in it together and mc just has a headache from it all... ALSO have you read 4-05 yet bc theyre so funny i cant get enough of them. My favorite 5 year olds. -Marsh

THEYRE SO FUNNY KJFBGKSJDS somebody pls get our girl mc like, a lifetime supply of ibuprofen, she needs it, dealing with these four dunderheads

i havent yet!!!! i unlocked it last night but was too tired to play thru it hh but that means im DEFFO gonna play it today :DDDD im very excited now that u mention the emotional age of the team because yes YESSSS GIMME MORE OF THEM IDIOTSSSSSS

[canyouhearthelight]

The Miys, Ch. 25

Hey Everyone!

Wow. Chapter 25.  I started this story as a response to a writing prompt, and it has just escalated so quickly from there.  I am super grateful for everyone who has joined the ride.  Don’t worry, this isn’t the end yet.  I hope to keep writing until they reach the new planet, so no idea how long the entire story will be.

This chapter is kicking the drama up a notch, and was beta’d by the lovely @parisconstantine, who rated it a full “Dun-dun-DUHHHHH!” on the drama scale.  Hope you all enjoy!

The next day, I ended up visiting my sister where she was holed up, still in bed.  “I’m sorry to break this to you, but you smell awful, Tych,” I told her once I sat down at the foot of her futon.

She flung her arm as she rolled over, groaning. “I’m not even surprised.  I felt like I was on fire yesterday.  I may have sweated more than I drank.”  She gestured at the small pile of empty water bottles next to her.  “Food was right out.  I was too tired from burning up to eat, and hot liquids were not happening.  My veins were on fire, I swear.”

“Did you take anything?” I asked, worried.  The only time I had seen her like this was during a really dark period, just after we started speaking again Before.

“Just acetaminophen and ibuprofen, I swear.”

“I believe you,” I reassure her.  “I was just checking in case someone gave you the wrong thing for a headache, thinking it would help.”

“Nuh uh,” she muttered.  “I know I get sick from some stuff, so I just asked for the lowest thing I could think of. No clue what set it off.  But I’m fine now, just worn out.”

“You hungry?” I asked. “I have savory grits and chorizo. Well, sorta-chorizo.”

She propped herself up, squinting. “Who the hell asked for grits and chorizo?  It was Japanese food last I knew.”

“I don’t know, but I thank them heartily,” I chuckled.  “Yesterday was vegetarian food, which was delicious but I was very glad kinda-eggs were on the menu for breakfast.  I also have a vanilla protein shake with an entire cup of black coffee added, if food is too much for you right now.”

“Gimme both,” she grumbled, making grabby-hands.  After a slurp of the coffee-protein concoction I handed her, she attacked her food with a delicacy that belied how hungry she clearly was.  I contented myself with the second coffee-protein shake I brought while she quickly ate the first solid food she had in two days.  When she finished, she washed it down with the last of her water before gulping her caffeinated protein shake again.  “Have I missed anything?” she gasped after chugging half the shake.

“Not really,” I crushed the urge to laugh. “Everyone is exhausted and grouchy, we’re on our fourth planetary satellite trying to get what we need to fix the sensors.  So far, we have less than a third of what we need, and after this satellite we will need to relocate from Eenie to Meenie.”

“Okay, but what aren’t you telling me?”

“You know about the sabotage, right?” She nodded. “Derek and Zach are working like madmen to figure out who hacked the system.”

“I thought it was just a smash job? Wreck everything?”

“Yeah, but it was apparently planned in advance.  Whoever did it made sure to take down the sensors from every public area to the storage bay from an hour and a half before until just before Huynh and Noah went to get the backups.  In five-minute intervals, no less, so the sensor data we have is useless.  Which also means that this was certainly deliberate, if we had any doubts remaining.” I rubbed my neck and twisted it.

Tyche caught the gesture and furrowed her brows. “Stress migraines?” she asked, concerned.

“Yeah,” I huffed.  “They happen. I’d be more surprised if I didn’t have one, honestly.  I’m doped up enough to keep it to a dull roar, so I’m good to soldier on.”

“You know you don’t have to do that right? Not anymore?  Everything going on is out of your jurisdiction.  You can rest.”

“I know, I know, but the Council agreed that we need to make regular updates to keep the rest of the ship as up to date as we can on the situation, try to keep everyone calm.  We’re worried it’ll be like the End riots all over again.  The biggest factor then was a lack of information, so we want to keep everyone in the loop.”

“Including the sabotage?” she asked skeptically.

“Not that,” I shook my head.  “It would defeat the purpose.  People would start being suspicious of their neighbors all over again, and we just got past that.  As soon as the investigation is over, we’ll release everything, but not until then unless we absolutely have to.”

“What’s going to happen to them?” she whispered.

“Who?”

“Whoever did it.”

I sighed heavily. “I honestly don’t know.  We are woefully unprepared for this.  The humans on board this ship are supposed to represent the best of us that were left.  The brave, the kind, the brilliant.  I feel like we’re supposed to be proving that we are worth this entire effort of being saved by Noah’s people, and the idea that someone would do this….it feels like a huge betrayal of us all.” I shook my head again. “Anyways, we gotta find them before we can even figure out what to do about it, so we have a little bit of time to think on it.”

“A Darwin award should be involved,” she mused. When I scowled, she just laughed ruefully. “What!? They could have killed everyone on board, including themselves, with that stunt. Between that and the fact that what’s left of us on Earth won’t make it more than a couple of generations, they could have single-handedly ended humanity, just like that,” she snapped her fingers for emphasis.

Ice ran down my spine, making me shiver.  “I have been fervently avoiding that thought, thank you.  All this shit we did in our history, including inventing planet-busting weapons before we made it to the moon, and all it would have taken is one person with who-knows-what motivation to make us all just less than a footnote in galactic history.”  I finished my shake to brace myself before standing up.  “I’m heading back to the ‘bridge’.  Grab a shower and join us when you’re ready.  Antoine has been lost as to what to do with himself.”

She waved her hand vaguely. “Okay, okay.  I get it.  Meet you there.”

Back on the area we had dubbed the ‘bridge’ – the main room of Level One – I did my standard checks with my fellow Councillors, looking for updates.  To my chagrin, they had nothing for me, so I couldn’t even send out a ship-wide update.  Resigning myself to doing nothing until something changed, I snagged a plate of snacks and a server of juice before hunting down Arantxa.

“Have you heard anything from Derek or Zach?” I asked quietly.

She shook her head. “They haven’t found anything yet, but they both promised to tell me as soon as they do.”

“Why you?” I asked, curious. “Wouldn’t they tell Xiomara, or her aide?”

“Usually, yes,” she tilted her head in agreement. “However, Xiomara’s aide is one of the drone pilots, and so is Pranav’s.  Xiomara is keeping an eye on the pilot teams, making sure they rotate when they should and keeping Maverick from interfering with them until we need to move to Meenie.  So I volunteered, since you don’t really have anything for me to do.” She shrugged.

“Yeah, that makes sense,” I admitted.  “As bored as I am right now, I can’t imagine what it’s been like for you.”

“Eh,” she made a gesture of dismissal.  “I’m still managing the food as it comes and goes, and making sure we have sleeping space and showers sorted.  The things I would normally do.  Although, I think you should take over deciding the menus,” she wrinkled her nose. “I don’t think I’m doing the best job on that, honestly.”

“You decided on the chorizo?  That was inspired, believe me,” I chucked. “Although I have to admit, the all vegetarian options, all day yesterday, was probably not the best call.  You do realize that all the meat is synthesized from raw protein, right?”

“That did not occur to me until later,” she confessed.  “Not to mention I realized I have a very limited knowledge of vegetarian dishes.”

I patted her hand consolingly.  “Tell you what, I’ll grab you when I make up the menu for tomorrow so you can pick up a few pointers, okay?”

“Thank you,” she sighed.  “I just learned to cook.  Trying to decide what nearly one hundred people would be eating each day was – what is it, biting off more than I can chew?”

“Yep, that would be it,” I confirmed. “Usually, when you have to do something like that, someone shows you the first few times until you get the idea.  So, let’s back up to that part, okay?”

“Gladly.”

“Gladly what?” my sister asked as she sat down.

Arantxa laughed and gestured to me. “My wonderful friend and boss here just agreed to take over the menu for the food brought in, and is going to show me how to do it.”

When Tyche quirked and eyebrow, I clarified.  “Apparently, Arantxa is responsible for both the chorizo this morning and the vegetarian nightmare yesterday.”

“Hey, vegetarian food isn’t that bad!” my sister tried to defend our companion.

“It is when you aren’t very familiar with cuisine,” Arantxa admitted sheepishly.

“Oh. Ohhh.  Ew.” My sister wrinkled her nose, setting off more laughter. While I was trying to pull myself together, she finished off my juice.  “Mmm.  What’s that?”

“Pinkish?” I shrugged, still giggling.  “I thought it was grapefruit, but it wasn’t.  Tasted good, though, so I didn’t mind.”

“Tomato and orange virgin sangria,” Arantxa explained.  “One of the drone pilots requested it.”

“So, gotta get that recipe,” I mused as Tyche went to refill my glass and get her own.  Once she was back, I brought Tyche up to date on Arantxa’s missed date with Conor for lack of anything else to do.  Arantxa let us know that she had been sending Conor messages back and forth, and that she finally made sure to tell Conor she hoped she could reschedule their date. We were so engrossed in the developments between two of our favorite people that I barely noticed my sister scratching at her arms.

Suddenly, Tyche sat bolt upright, her face pale, before she reached over and knocked my drink out of my hand, shattering the glass on the floor. “Don’t eat or drink anything!” she shouted, standing up.  “Something is spiked!”

“What are you talking about!?” I cried, swiping uselessly at the juice now covering my clothes.

“Vicodin,” she hissed.  “We both have bad reactions to Vicodin, Soph. My veins are on fire, and you’ve had a migraine since after the food started coming in, right?  Doesn’t get better no matter how much painkillers you use? What does that sound like to you?”

Holy shit, she was right. “Get Xiomara. Now. And Grey.  Tell them to drop whatever they are doing and come here, right now,” I demanded. She nodded before hurrying off. “Noah!” I called, looking around. “I need you right now.  Rants, I need you to clear the food and drink, except anything that is sealed.” She bolted to the tables that had been set up against one wall.

Noah and my sister arrived at the same time, Xiomara and Grey in tow. “Xiomara, do you have bad reactions to any painkillers?”

“Yes,” she responded, confused. “Paracetamol. I had it once for a broken leg, and it just gave me a migraine on top of the pain from my leg.”

“Grey, what is paracetamol?” I demanded.

“Um, a narcotic, commonly known as hydrocodone or Vicodin,” they answered, equally confused.

“Have you ever taken it before?”

“No. My family does not believe in painkillers?” they looked uncertain at the line of questioning.

“Noah,” I turned, a pleading look on my face. “Can you please check all the consumables, as well as everyone on this deck, for traces of that drug?  We have very strong reason to believe someone has contaminated everything.”

“Huh?” Xiomara and Grey squinted at me.

“Tyche has an incredibly specific reaction to Vicodin.  It’s the only reaction any of us has had that can’t be passed off as stress.  It started, just now, about twenty or thirty minutes after she ate and drank some of the food that had been brought in.  She was fine this morning, after being holed up with nothing but bottled water for twenty-four hours, then suddenly it started again. What did you eat yesterday, Tych?”

“I didn’t,” she confirmed. “I was so miserable that I just couldn’t bring myself to eat anything.”

“Zach took you something,” I insisted. “He told me so.”

“Yeah, he brought me plain scrambled eggs, but I never ate them.  After I sent him to make sure you were eating, I dumped them in the nearest disposal.”

“Tyche, you are one-hundred percent sure that your reaction isn’t just stress?” Xiomara demanded.

“All due respect, Councillor Kalloe, but stress doesn’t turn your blood into molten lava,” my sister responded snarkily.

“Fair enough,” Xiomara agreed.  “Grey, what are the side effects of taking Vicodin?”

“Dizziness, light-headedness, difficulty concentrating, headaches, nausea, vomiting, constipation, anxiety, and mood changes,” they rattled off before tilting their head. “Yes, I do agree that most if not all of those can be also attributed to stress in a situation like this.”

“The drone pilots are dizzy, all the time,” I started. “Grey Hodenson can’t concentrate.  Xiomara and I have had constant migraines, among a few others. Nearly everyone has been lightheaded, dizzy, or just spacy in general. Add to that Tyche’s allergic reaction, there’s nothing else it can be.”

Noah shuffled and dipped, their version of a nod. “I will test everyone on the deck and any remaining consumables.  I will also start testing any food or drink that is brought in before allowing anyone to consume it.”

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[set-phasers-to-whump]

whumptober day 26

prompt: fist fight (alt prompt #5)

whumpee: neal caffrey

i woke up at 6:30 and wrote this lol sorry for any errors im a lil sleepy still

Most people, if you pickpocketed them right, wouldn’t even know they’d been pickpocketed until they went for their wallet and found it missing. Even then, they might suppose it had simply come out of their pocket, and it might take them quite a while to determine what had really happened. Maybe they’d go back over the events of the day mentally, and remember their brief but unusual encounter with you. But it was unlikely they’d be able to remember you, and you’d have at least half an hour to do some shopping with their credit cards before they called the bank to cancel them, plus you got whatever cash they’d happened to be carrying. Most people were easy to pickpocket.

Neal Caffrey was not most people. He was a conman-he knew all the tricks. So when a nice young man approached him, asking for directions and looking for all the world like another lost tourist, Neal was suspicious. He directed the man to the sandwich shop he’d been looking for, and felt a hand in his pocket that most people wouldn’t have noticed.

He stepped back away from the man and pushed his wallet back into his pocket. “Nice try,” he commented. 

The man looked at him in surprise for a second, and then his fight-or-flight instincts kicked in. Most pickpockets, when discovered, would go for the flight option, as it presented far less of a risk for further discovery then getting into a fight on the street.

But this man knew the risks-it was late evening, getting dark, and there weren’t a whole lot of people around. So he went for the option of fight.

Neal, who had not at all expected this, and who’d been prepared to simply let the man run off, was caught entirely off guard by a punch to the face. He stumbled backwards slightly, then stood back up. “You can run,” he offered. “I won’t tell anyone.”

The man grinned at him. “Just gimme your wallet and I’ll be on my way.”

“I really shouldn’t do that,” Neal replied. He could only imagine that the FBI would be angry at him if he had the audacity to get mugged, considering his background. He’d be a little angry at himself, too. So he also went for the fight option, and kicked at the man’s ankles, which sent him stumbling backwards as well.

The man was quick, though, and Neal found himself pushed into a wall, the bricks digging uncomfortably into his back. A fist connected with his eye and his head was slammed into the wall. He kicked the man again and wriggled away from his grasp, blinking away the stars from his vision. 

He attempted to punch the other man in the face as well, but was stopped by an uppercut to the jaw. He yelped in surprise as his head snapped back, throwing his balance off for a second-which was all his attacker needed. The hand once again snaked into his pocket. 

Neal decided he might as well use his already-aching head. But not in the thinking sense. He headbutted the man just as his wallet came out of his pocket which caused said wallet to clatter to the ground. He quickly scooped it up and was punched in the nose for his efforts. He felt blood begin to drip down his face and ran at his attacker, tackling him to the ground. They grappled for a few seconds, during which both of them sustained quite a few punches, and suddenly Neal’s wallet was ripped from his hands, and before he could do anything, he was alone.

Neal staggered to his feet, wiping the blood away from under his nose, which continued to bleed. His body ached, and his head was pounding, and his wallet was gone. He needed to do something about at least one of those things, he decided. So he went to the Burkes’.

It wasn’t a far walk-he supposed he should be thankful for that. Even a two-mile radius could turn into a lot of walking from one end to the other, but he’d been mugged around halfway between his place and the Burkes’. Lucky him.

It was a little after eight when he arrived at their door. Good, he thought. I won’t be interrupting their dinner or their sleep. He knocked, then leaned against the door to rest and wait for them to answer. 

The door was opened, and he nearly went stumbling into Elizabeth, managing to catch himself on the doorframe at the last second.

“Sorry to bother you,” he said. 

“What happened?” El asked, already pulling him inside. “Lean your head forward and pinch your nose closed, okay? That’ll stop the bleeding. Peter!” she called.

Neal did as he was told, glancing up when Peter came into the room. He asked the same question as his wife.

“Just a fistfight,” Neal replied in a slightly muffled voice, not wanting to tell Peter that his wallet had been stolen. How embarrassing was that, an (alleged) thief being stolen from?

Peter sighed and led him to the bathroom. “Please don’t bleed on my floor,” he said, directing Neal to sit down on the closed lid of the toilet.

“I’m not trying to,” Neal muttered, slightly regretting his decision to come.

“Be nice to him, Peter,” Elizabeth admonished her husband. “I’m sure it wasn’t his fault, was it, Neal?”

Neal shook his head, immediately wishing he hadn’t, as the movement caused his head to hurt even more. 

“See?” El said. 

Peter didn’t look convinced. “What did happen, then?” he asked.

Now it was Neal’s turn to sigh. Was he really going to have to tell them he’d been mugged?

“Fine, I got mugged, okay?” His hand came away from his nose, which had mostly stopped bleeding. “Some guy tried to take my wallet but I noticed him, and then he hit me, and I hit him, but he got away and he has my wallet now.”

“How many times did you hit each other?” Peter asked, as he applied antiseptic to the few scrapes Neal had received during the fight.

“I dunno. A lot,” Neal offered, sitting as still as he could while Peter worked. 

“You’re going to have a hell of a black eye,” Peter informed him as he finished with the antiseptic. “How much does it hurt?”

“It’s not that bad. Mostly it’s my head that hurts,” Neal confessed.

At this, El promptly stood up from her seat on the edge of the bathtub and hurried to the kitchen to grab some ibuprofen. 

While his wife was up, Peter carefully wiped the blood away from under Neal’s nose, and from the rest of his face below that, down to his neck. “How long was this bleeding?” he asked.

“Fifteen minutes?” Neal guessed. “I dunno.”

“Next time, try to stop the bleeding when it happens,” Peter advised.

“I was a little busy trying not to get beat up,” Neal retorted. 

Elizabeth returned with a glass of water and two ibuprofen. “For your headache,” she told him, pressing the items into his hands. He took them gratefully, then stood up slowly. 

“Thanks,” he said. “I’ll get out of your hair now.”

“Oh no, you won’t,” El said. “Peter and I were just about to watch a movie. I’ll make some popcorn, and you two call the bank and cancel your cards.”

Neal looked to Peter uncertainly. 

“Of course you can stay,” Peter said finally. “Come sit on the couch and we’ll take care of your cards.”

“The FBI’s not gonna be mad at me?” Neal asked.

“They might be a little upset, but they’ll get over it,�� Peter said reassuringly. 

A few minutes later, the three of them were settled on the couch, watching Return of the Jedi. Neal was sitting between the two Burkes, Elizabeth’s arm draped over his shoulders, her hand resting atop Peter’s shoulder. His head was aching less, and the bruises which he was sure he had were also managing to not hurt very much, thanks to the drugs. 

The Burkes still enjoyed their movie night, and if Neal happened to fall asleep halfway through with his head on Peter’s shoulder, who would ever know?

thanks for reading!!!

[builder051]

prompt list

I actually have 435 followers now; IDK how that happened…

Alright.  Here’s how this is going to work.  Last time I did a prompt list, I got an overwhelming response (I wrote 22 fics), and I only had 100 followers back then.  This time around, I’m instituting some rules to keep things running smoothly.

I’ll keep this event running for one week (Evening of Thursday 05 July through Evening of Thursday 12 July) OR until I receive 25 prompts (controlling for duplicates).  At that point, my inbox will close again until I’ve written all of them.  I plan to post them as I write them, so I’m not sure how many I’ll get done each day.  My goal is to write at least one prompt a day, however, don’t get upset if things get a little delayed; my leg is in a cast and I am back working full time, so I got some shit going on.

**When you ask for a prompt, please copy and paste it into the ask**  This saves me having to go back and look it up later.  It also makes it way easier to search for the posts after they’re published.

There is no length guarantee.  Some of these lend themselves to short drabbles, and others work as longer fics, so expect some variety there.  In order to appeal to everyone’s various interests, I’ve tried to mark the prompts as to whether or not they’ll feature emeto.  Per usual, most of the prompts are sickfic-, angst-, or h/c-based, but a few are comedic.  I’ve bolded a few of the fanfic prompts I’m super ecstatic about, but no pressure.  Choose whichever you like best.  If there’s something else you’re desperate to see (especially if it’s for creedless assassins, since I didn’t put them on the list), feel free to send in an ask with your own prompt, though I reserve the right to say no thanks.

Thank you so much for following and for sticking with me.  I hope this is a fun event for all of us.

My OCs: Jax Beach

1  Todd gets motion sickness when Mel brings home a VR headset (emeto)

2  Mark gets overheated and sick while he and Troy are at Pride (emeto)

3  Mel assists when Amelia is sick at work (emeto)

4  Mark tries to surprise Troy at work and take him out to dinner, but homeboy isn’t feeling up to it

My OCs: Mike & Co

5  Drunk/high Colby gets sick and spends the night on a street corner (AKA that one piece of his backstory I keep referencing but have never written about) (emeto)

6  Ash gets motion sickness while he and Hannah travel by greyhound bus (AKA that one prompt I keep meaning to get to and never do) (emeto)

7  Mike has strep and Jason threatens to quarantine her

8  Colby takes Jason to hot yoga and things go very badly (emeto)

My OCs: Bostonians (H and P are in the middle of a thing, so these are going to be either prequels to their current arc or prompts for Kris and Khalil)

9  Kris is a good Samaritan when a member of the church choir faints/gets sick (emeto)

10  Hildur drags herself to the drugstore for provisions when she’s sick with the flu

11 Kris takes a depressed Khalil out to breakfast and tries to cheer him up even though he really doesn’t want to hear it (sorry this is a super weird prompt, but it’s already a wip on my computer)

12  Pierce is determined to make it through the workday even though he’s sick and looks terrible (emeto)

Captain America

13  Pre-serum Steve takes care of a drunk Bucky (Heroverse, pre-WWII) (emeto)

14  Darcy looks out for Bucky when he’s sick at work (Powers/No Powers) (emeto)

15  More on Steve and Bucky’s “not bad for the end of the world” moment in Infinity War (could possibly go nsfw; missing moments)

16  Bucky has another seizure (Whoa Bessie) (emeto)

Irondad and Spiderson

17  Tony gives Peter a talking-to about staying up all night when he stays at the facility upstate (but sometimes you really do have to study for a Spanish quiz)

18  Tony’s injured on a mission, Peter fusses, Tony objects, and Peter pulls the “if it had happened to me, you’d be fussing” card

19  Peter throws up after doing some Spider-Man acrobatics and tries to walk it off, but he’s actually sick (emeto)

20  Tony has a panic attack in front of Peter (emeto)

Other Spider-Man

21  May tries to convince Peter he doesn’t have to go to his Stark internship when he’s sick (emeto)

22  Peter comes to school sick and ragged out, and Ned tries to guess what kind of adventures Peter was up to all night as Spider-Man (“No, dude, I’m just sick.  Gimme a break.”)

23  Peter and Shuri are working on a project and Peter’s super antsy.  Shuri asks him what’s up, and Peter tries to play it cool, but he’s super nauseated (emeto)

24  Peter’s on patrol even though he has a fever, and Karen gives him all kinds of warnings

Nat on Fire

25  Nat attempts to hide a concussion (emeto)

26  Steve and Nat have a fight about Nat’s declining health

27  Nat starts using again, and Steve finds her high

28  Flashback where Nat detoxes from cocaine before joining SHIELD (emeto)

Clint & Laura

29  Laura calls Clint in sick to work (“Sorry, Nick, Clint can’t come to the phone right now.  He’s hugging the toilet.”) (emeto)

30  It’s Clint’s turn to get up and soothe the crying baby, but when he gets out of bed, it’s all he can do to get to the bathroom before he pukes (emeto)

31  Clint and Laura have date night all planned, but Clint’s sick and they end up staying in for ginger ale and saltines (emeto)

32  When your wife tells you you don’t look so good, you should probably believe her

Science Bros

33  Tony and Bruce get drunk, and Tony’s a lot more used to it than poor Bruce (emeto)

34  Tony’s new suit upgrades go amiss and he ends up motion sick (emeto)

35  The boys work out a serum to calm Bruce down after hulking out, and it ends up doing a number on his stomach (emeto)

36  The giant bag of weed mentioned in Avengers (2012) is actually a thing

Nat & Bruce

37  Nat’s injured on a mission and in a lot of pain, Bruce hovers (emeto)

38  Bruce calms down after hulking out on a mission, Nat watches out for him (emeto)

39  Nat sleeps over in Bruce’s room and wakes early with a fever.  Cue some raised eyebrows when he starts looking for ibuprofen for homegirl while the rest of the team is eating breakfast

40  Bruce is hiding/avoiding everyone because he’s sick, and Nat just wants to check that he’s ok

Black Panther

41  T’Challa does take Shuri to Coachella, and she gets overheated

42  T’Challa takes a kick to the gut in combat and has a little trouble shaking it off (emeto)

43  T’Challa’s sick and Shuri has medication for him in her lab, but she makes him wait for her to bring it to him so he won’t vomit near her precious equipment (emeto)

44  Shuri tags along to train with Okoye and T’Challa and ends up pushing herself a bit too hard (emeto)

Daredevil

45  Foggy’s sick with a fever, and he’s super confused when he sees Matt taking care of him and running around the apartment like he’s not blind at all

46  Claire’s patching Matt up after a night of vigilante shenanigans, and he vomits from the pain (emeto)

47  Karen and Matt are alone in the office when Matt gets sick, and she’s not sure how much help he needs (ensue mega hovering) (emeto)

48  Claire suspects Matt has a concussion and calls Foggy to babysit him while she goes to work even though Matt insists he’s fine (he’s not) (emeto)

Jessica Jones (JJ/Avengers crossover)

49  Jess is belligerent and drunk; she and Nat have an argument

50  Jess is hungover (emeto)

51  Jess goes on a mission with Nat and gets injured but tries to convince Nat she’s fine

52  Nat and Jess get drunk together, and Nat doesn’t fare so well (emeto)

Criminal Minds

53  Spencer’s coming down with a bug, but being on the jet makes him sick to his stomach too (emeto)

54  JJ wakes up sick in the night and Will takes care of her (emeto)

55  Spencer’s anxious and craving drugs, so JJ comes to his aid

56  Spencer feels ill and faint at a crime scene and tries to explain that he’s not overwhelmed, he’s actually sick (emeto)

Titan A.E.

57  Akima’s reckless flying gives Cale motion sickness (emeto)

58  Cale is unwell and wandering the Valkyrie in the middle of the night when he runs into Akima

59  Alternate Cale and Korso meeting: Cale’s vomiting into a trash can and Korso comes to his aid (emeto)

60  Alternate Cale and Akima meeting: Cale’s nauseous when he wakes up injured on the Valkyrie (emeto)