#also fun fact. i never see myself in my dreams i see everything from my pov but in this dream i finally could see myself | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

bluishfrog · 7 months ago

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HAPPY 1-YEAR OF DRAWING ANNIVERSARY TO ME!

(Warning: slightly longer post incoming cause sometimes I gotta be a sentimental bitch ok? So let's go on a little trip down memory lane.)

This day, a year ago, I made my very first fanart. It was dnf (if that surprises you, then welcome to being on my blog for the very first time). I drew a little frog face too so I could use it as a watermark (fun fact: I still use that very same first one).

I immediately put my drawing up on twt because I told myself that I wasn't gonna be afraid of having people see that I was at the very beginning of this journey and had no clue what I was doing. That instead of being bad at art, I was gonna be awesome at being a beginner who doesn't know shit.

I started with little doodles and silly comics and then I laughed way too long when the first drawing of mine that gained some attention was a dnf butt joke. At the time I was trying to balance shipping and non-shipping art so I didn't even draw dnf that much but in hindsight it's probably the only possible way this could have gone.

At the very end of August I woke up to @honelle56 caps-locking at me in my messages - I was very confused and tired (I am no morning person and I will never be, fuck off with your mornings) because Dranart liked my drawing of singing Dream. Dranart was my 17th follower on twt which is a useless yet extremely funny fact about my time on that hellsite.

I also drew human!patches because a) patches was and will always be my favorite dteam member and b) it was a really cute trend and while I do love drawing dream, george and sapnap, I was also quite happy to try drawing anything but a white man for once. And I really liked how the drawing turned out.

Much, much later, I tried to draw my first slightly more realistic looking drawing. I was extremely confused on how to draw anything like this. Especially their hair gave me tons of trouble but given my experience, I think it's not a bad attempt.

When hijacked smp started I obviously wanted to participate, and I drew c!blu who doesn't associate with any side in particular but instead serves soup to everyone who visits her tavern 'The Soup House'. She also wants to be paid in stories from all around the map.

One of the events I was most excited about was dnf week. I even collaborated with two talented writers and I drew the corresponding art for two fics.

(Fun or not so fun fact: when twt had like three hundred collaborative aneurysms about the situation at that moment, that was when I created this tumblr account. I didn't use it super actively (I guess I needed another situation to fully make the switch) but I at least started the account that now developed quite a bit since then.)

I didn't really draw at all through January and February and I actually kinda thought I would move on from that hobby and fandom (not because of negative feelings, just because I didn't really have the urge to create anything within this fandom) and then situations happened and now I am here; and for some reason that is beyond any logic and my understanding I am now even more insane about dteam.

Wild to me but we are rolling with it now, I guess.

Since I got here, I drew more than ever (I actually think I might have made more drawings in the month since I got here than I made the whole rest of the year). There's just such an active and funny community here that cares about fan works for the sake of creating and not just because a CC might see it.

Unfortunately, Tumblr won't let me add more than 10 images in one post (maybe fortunately for everyone who has this monstrosity of a post on their dash). So if you want to see all the progress I made since I got here, you can look at everything in my art tag. For now, I will close this post with one of the art works from the past month that I like the most:

Can't wait to see what the next year might bring :)

Love, blu

#blu rambles #like a LOT #but if you made it to the end of this post you get a hug <3 #bluishfrog art

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valeriianz · 5 months ago

Note

For the fic writer asks:

4. Obviously you did research for BitB. I'd love you to ramble about it if you like I'm sure you've got STORIES

5. Did you outline it?

7. How'd you decide it would be Hob's pov?

25-27 I'd love to know a/some favorite lines, details, and any lore you might want to share

omg TJ what wonderful questions! thank you!! this is going to get LONG!

4: Rambling about research!

do you wanna see a screen shot of my bookmarks under my "band au" folder?

man, and that's only what could fit on the screen.

there is... SO MUCH i chose to ignore for this fic. ideas that i had to drop, lines or extra details about the other band members equipment. more logistics, what Lucienne actually does, what Mervyn has to put up with as the new touring stage manager... i realized very early on that i couldn't possibly cram all this (super cool and eye opening) information into the fic and still keep reader's interest and, most importantly, to not stray away from the fact that this is a dreamling fic. whenever i felt myself getting carried away with a side character or job or even social media numbers, gossip, outside POVs, i had to reign myself in and get back on track. there will be time for exploring everything i missed in side stories after BitB is finished. i just hope i still have the energy to write it all.

once, i was so deep into research that after publishing chapter 2, i went into work and when my chef asked what "GA" meant on my prep list, i answered with full confidence, "general admission."

(it means "get ahead.")

the worst part of this entire writing process is im still learning new shit. i havent rewatched or read a lot of what i've saved because, to be very honest, i was feeling a little burnt out. it's why we're kinda full steam dreamling now. it's why ive been glossing over a lot of technical stuff and being vague about conversations amongst the crew/not including it at all. i don't prefer ignoring my research, but at the end of the day i want to still enjoy writing this fic and finish it. even if i can't be as descriptive and detailed and nuanced as i used to be.

5: Did you outline the fic?

(also asked by @hardly-an-escape!)

i wouldn't call what i have a proper "outline," it's more like a 20k word document filled to the brim with notes that i skim at least a dozen times while i'm writing a new chapter (being in my brain is literally hell). i live multichapter life very dangerously. i copy and paste lines or sections (always scattered, never together! augh!) that are meant to go together and plop them in a new document titled "band au ch.#" and then i structure the chapter around what i want to happen.

but to answer this question in the plainest of terms: yeah. i know exactly what's going to happen up until the very end. even if its all in my head and the only concrete shit that's written down are beats/plot points. i'll figure out the rest later!

7: How'd you decide it would be Hob's POV?

i actually never even considered writing it from Dream's POV. this was my first fic in the fandom (which is so nuts to think about lol) and writing in Dream's POV sounded so scary lol. i also just thought Hob's would be easier because i have worked a few backstage shows, back in my college years. i figured eh, i can make this work. and i loved exploring how weird and mysterious musicians can be, from a normie's POV. making Hob a fan first and having him worry about developing a parasocial relationship... it was fun to explore.

25: Share your favorite line

oh god, i have so many haha.

“What are you thinking about?” starting in ch.2 and onward lmao

“It’s–�� Dream laughs quietly, bitterly. “I don’t like change.” He says each word with emphasis, eyes trailing down to fixate somewhere past Hob. “And I still hold onto the things I can control, like my instruments–” his eyes swing up to regard Hob apologetically. “Or my clothes or my–” he brings a hand up and wiggles his fingers around his head. “My hair.” ch.4

"His majesty is pleased." ch.5

“You are obsessive,” he states, slow and cool and with a quiet smile cracking through his composure. “Just like me.” ch.7

“You look good.” Hob has to lean in to say so, unwilling to raise his voice amongst the roar of the fans. ch.11

“Del looks like porcelain, but she’s actually made of steel.” Desire swirls the contents of their glass before pushing their shoulders back with a deep breath. “She's tougher than all of us.” ch.11

“Everything. I want…” his fingers tighten in Hob’s hair, pulling him closer, speaking against his lips. “…Everything.” ch.14

26: Share your favorite detail

how intentionally coy Dream behaves. i love keeping him a mystery and deciding when and how much to allow his intentions to peek through has been so fun lol.

Despair is in fact covered in tattoos and piercings! i say this because i feel like sometimes i forget lmao. (but also her and Hob don't interact much so. my bad haha).

Delirium's constant explosion of color in the way she dresses <3

Hob's dedication to his job, Dream, and the people he cares about the most. i don't care if people think i'm making him too soft and good, im gonna project on that man and make him a sweet, sweet simp lmao

and ah, this doesn't matter anymore, and i kinda regret doing it but. i originally had Dream's favorite bass all black but the pickguard was white. so it actually looked like Jessamy. not gonna lie when @designtheendless drew it all black i decided i liked it better that way. and truly i do. that's when i went back to ch.1 and changed it haha. to actually see the guitar with Dream, all done up sparkling black and purple flecks... gosh it's just so him. but then i got up to the reveal that the guitar's name was Jessamy and i was like, "oh, right." lmao. no one seems to care so i'll leave it be.

27: Share a piece of lore you made up for the story

i have a lot lmao. and this post is already so long... im hoping i can get to some if not all of it in side fics in the future. but for now, here's some that's more like headcanons but:

Dream hates flying. he can full on go into panic attacks on the plane if he allows himself to get into his own head.

this was mentioned briefly in ch.4, while Dream was discussing the formation of the band, but Despair was in another band before joining Endless. she is the only character in the fic who gets to keep her English roots (lol sorry) and is the oldest in the band (30).

all of the band members ages: Dream, Desire, and Death are all 28 and Delirium is 22.

Dream can experience subdrop after going too hard during a performance.

Dream paints his own nails, it's very therapeutic.

as an exercise, i explored my own headcanons for Dream in this verse in a word doc, and one thing i will share from it that you might find interesting: If I were to ever give Dream a theological values, I would describe him as a satanist. He is a physical and pragmatic person, nonconforming, and although he is introverted, he enjoys being a part of a community (he loves his band).

also found this in my notes: How Desire and Dream got along was Death making them fight it out. Hob raises an eyebrow “like in a brawl?” He couldn't imagine Desire throwing hands. “No, in a pillow fight that escalated in hair pulling and verbal taunts.”

fic writer asks

#yooooo #this took me a long time to answer lol #i gotta go to bed but #THANK YOU SO MUCH TJ!!#dreamling #(why not. there's a lot here let put it out into the main tag!)#fic: bolt in the blue #im so satisfied ahhh thanks again #:)

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freetimesimmer-l · 3 months ago

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The Sims 4 Rainbow Legacy Challenge

Introduction

Welcome to this Rainbow Legacy Challenge! This is the first Sims challenge I’ve ever made and I’m excited to share it. Even if it never reaches an audience, I can still play the challenge for myself because I’m very proud of what I’ve put together.

I’ve taken some inspiration from the beloved Not So Berry Challenge by @lilsimsie, but workshopped it into something completely new. I’m sure there are plenty of rainbow challenges for The Sims online, but this is my personal take on it. I hope you like it!

I’ve made it a point to make this challenge accessible for everyone: for players that have some (or all) packs installed, and for those rocking with just the base game. I have marked everything that is DLC in color. The DLCs are optional and are not necessary for completing this challenge, but of course it adds much more depth to the story overall. Additionally, in numerous instances I’ve given you as the player options for choosing certain traits, careers or aspirations that are either DLC or base game.

I hope you enjoy the challenge as much as I enjoyed creating it. Thank you!

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The Rules

Set the lifespan of your sims to either normal or long.

Cheats are (in most cases) not allowed. You may not cheat money at any point, but cheats like debug fixes, move objects and full edit mode in CAS are allowed. Also, I’ll allow gender cheats for babies if you really want to.

Start the first generation as a young adult.

Each generation represents a certain color of the rainbow, but the extent of which they represent the color (i.e. hair, makeup, clothing, interior and exterior design of their houses) is completely up to you. As long as they are still recognizable as representing certain colors, anything goes.

Each generation is fully completed when all bullet points are achieved (but don’t worry too much if you don’t fully complete everything in time).

Again: DLC traits, careers, aspirations and skills are optional. The challenge is fully playable with just the base game.

Last but not least: just have fun!

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Generation 1: Red

Red is the color of love, passion and lust, but also of danger and aggression. Fittingly for this first generation, you can choose which path to romance you will take: will you be a hot-headed heartstopper and enjoy all the love the world has to give, or will you find ‘The One’ that will fulfill all your desires and remain loyal to them, and only them?

'Besides the fact that you dream of finding luck in romance, you have always deeply loved music. As you gained fame from your musical career, you earned the reputation of the 'heartthrob musician'. And although you love the attention and fans fawning over you, you just want to find honest love. You dream of sitting on the porch of your home, watching the sunset with your lover and serenading them a song you wrote specially for them. It might take a couple tries to find 'The One', but you just know they're out there waiting for you.'

Traits: Romantic / Hot Headed / Music Lover

Career: Entertainment or Romance Consultant (LS)

Aspiration: Serial Romantic or Soulmate

Complete either the Serial Romantic or Soulmate aspiration

Reach level 10 in the Entertainment career in the Musician branch or the Romance Consultant career (LS) in either branch

Reach level 10 of the Charisma skill, Singing skill (CL) and Romance skill (LS) and at least level 8 of either the Guitar, Piano or Violin skill

Marry at least once

Write at least one song dedicated to your lover/spouse

Serenade your partner at least once a week

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Generation 2: Orange

Orange, the color of amusement, excitement, extraversion and energy.

'As you grew up you’ve developed a keen eye for seeing what others might need to cheer them up. Your solution? Funny jokes and good food can put anybody back in a good mood. While your passion lies with cooking, you never back down from social outings with your friends and you’d do anything to make sure they’re having a great time. You’re well known among friends and the rest of the community as outgoing, fun-loving and an excellent cook. And since they’re always nagging you about it, who knows, maybe you’ll even open up a restaurant or bakery someday.'

Traits: Goofball / Foodie / either Outgoing, Bro or Insider (GT)

Career: Culinary

Aspiration: Master Chef

Complete the Master Chef aspiration

Reach level 10 in the Culinary career in the Chef branch

Reach level 10 of the Cooking, Gourmet cooking and Baking skill (GTW) and at least level 8 of the Comedy skill

Have a social outing with your friends or club (GT) at least once a week

Optional: own a restaurant (DO) or bakery (GTW)

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Generation 3: Yellow

Ahhh, yellow. The color of sunshine and joy, but sometimes also of cowardice.

'Growing up, you often saw your parents have fun at social gatherings in and around your house. You reveled in the joyful atmosphere and always wanted to join in, even if it was well past your bedtime. As you got older, you wanted to be just like your parents and have lots of friends to do fun stuff with. Being a little impulsive and lacking any clear steering as to what career you wanted to pursue, you ended up at a boring 9-5 desk job at a local firm. Although it isn’t your ideal job, you’ll be damned if you don’t make it work!'

Traits: Ambitious / Cheerful / Clumsy

Career: Business or Law (DU)

Aspiration: Friend of the World

Complete the Friend of the World aspiration

Reach level 10 in either the Business or Law career (DU) in either branch

Reach level 10 of the Charisma and Mixology skills

Have frequent social outings with friends and take the opportunity to tend the bars at local clubs when there isn’t a bartender present

Have the following activities in your home for when you have company over: game table, dart board, chess table

Never decline calls from other sims asking if they can come over

Marry your Best Friend

Have at least 2 children

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Generation 4: Green

Green! The beautiful color of nature, healing, new beginnings and growth. Alternatively, it can also represent envy, jealousy, money and greed. In this generation, you can choose one of two paths for your sim (or alternatively, if your heir has brothers or sisters and you like a real challenge, give one sibling option A and the other option B. You may set the lifespan to long or pause aging for the duration of this if you really want to play both options).

Option A:

'During your youth you got all the love you could ever want from your parents: aside from their busy social and professional life, they still took enough free time to love and raise you. Although your youth was basically perfect, you often struggled with all the social interactions and visitors at your house. If being a highly sensitive person was a trait in the Sims 4, you would have it. Because of this, you longed for the peace and quiet that nature had to offer. You took a liking to gardening and dreamed of living outside the big city, away from all the noise.'

Traits: Loves Outdoors / Vegetarian / Loner

Career: Gardener (S) or self-employed

Aspiration: Freelance Botanist or The Curator

Complete either the Freelance Botanist or The Curator aspiration

Reach level 10 in the Gardener career (S) in either branch, or alternatively remain unemployed and register with the ministry of labor as a self-proclaimed ‘Naturalist’ and earn a living by growing and selling your crops

Reach level 10 of the Gardening and Flower arranging skill (S) and at least level 6 of the Fishing and Herbalism skill (OR)

Have a large garden with a variety of fruits, vegetables, herbs and flowers (try and cultivate at least one of every type of produce!)

Cook only with fresh ingredients from your garden and from fishing

If you want, you can also make the lot you live on off-the-grid for an added challenge

Optional: eat the Forbidden Fruit and become a plantsim

Option B:

'Growing up, your parents were too busy maintaining friendships and partying, so you lacked much parental love or guidance. Seeing other kids at school be given much more love and affection than you quite literally made you green with envy. This made you resent your parents and take a path of defiance in an attempt to gain the attention and recognition you lacked as a child.'

Traits: Jealous / Materialistic / either Mean or Squeamish (OR)

Career: Criminal

Aspiration: Public Enemy

Complete the Public Enemy aspiration

Reach level 10 of the Criminal Career in either branch

Reach level 10 of the Mischief skill and at least level 8 of the Programming skill

Use your programming skills on the computer to Hack and extort money from others

Have a secret lair/study room in your house

Because you’re too focused on being a criminal, you have little time for romance; have (or adopt) only 1 child as an adult and raise them independently

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Generation 5: Blue

Blue. The color of serenity, stability, inspiration and wisdom. Just like the color, you exude calmness.

'During your youth you were always called shy and introverted, and this continued into adulthood. Although you liked living surrounded by the quiet of nature, you often felt isolated and lonely, and this manifested into a gloomy outlook on life. Your biggest outlet by far was art. You loved drawing and painting, as it was a way to let out your creativity and complicated emotions. You've always aspired to make your hobby your job, and luckily for you, you might just succeed.'

Traits: Creative / Gloomy / either Perfectionist or Art Lover

Career: Painter

Aspiration: Painter Extraordinaire

Complete the Painter Extraordinaire aspiration

Reach level 10 in the Painter career in the Master of the Real branch

Reach level 10 of the Painting skill and at least level 8 of the Photography skill and Parenting skill (Ph)

Only paint emotional paintings (e.g. flirty, confident, sad)

Move back to the city as soon as you are able to

Meet the love of your life at school and marry them as a young adult

Have at least 3 children

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Generation 6: Indigo

Indigo. What an interesting color. Within the visible spectrum, it lies somewhere between blue and violet. It shares most of the same symbolizations as blue, like wisdom, justice, devotion and profound thought, but also mystery.

'Looking back, you’d say you had a great childhood. Loving parents, siblings to play with, maybe even pets. As a child you loved reading thrillers and superhero comics, and that’s where your strong feelings for justice started. Seeing your parent be especially vulnerable for bad news and having a gloomy and pessimistic outlook, you promised yourself you would make the world a better and safer place. As an adult, you took on a job of fighting crime while simultaneously keeping your eagerness to learn and love for reading alive.'

Traits: Self-Assured / Bookworm / Genius

Career: Secret Agent or Detective (GTW)

Aspiration: Renaissance Sim

Complete the Renaissance Sim aspiration

Reach level 3 in two part-time jobs as a teen before getting an adult job

Reach level 10 in the Secret Agent career in the Diamond Agent branch or in the Detective career (GTW)

Reach level 10 of the Logic skill and at least level 7 of the Athletic skill

Read at least one book a week

Have only 1 child

Visit your parents at least once a week to check up on them and reassure them

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Generation 7: Violet

Last but definitely not least: violet, or more commonly known as purple. The color of royalty, rarity, luxury and power. At its base, purple is a mix of blue and red. Fitting for our last generation (for now).

'During your youth you grew up rather wealthy, thanks to your parents’ well-paying jobs. In addition to that, you grew up as an only child. Talk about being spoiled. Your parent’s love for fiction and comic books and somewhat nerdy interests were (unsurprisingly) passed onto to you. You spend most of your time behind your computer gaming, programming and trolling people online. Because of your immense love for videogames, you chose to work in tech so you could make your hobby your career and not have to suffer one of those boring 9-5 jobs.'

Traits: Geek / Lazy / either Snob or Materialistic

Career: Tech Guru or Video Game Streamer (HSY)

Aspiration: Computer Whiz

Complete the Computer Whiz aspiration

Reach level 10 in the Tech Guru career in the eSport Gamer branch or the Video Game Streamer career (HSY)

Reach level 10 in the Video gaming and Programming skill and at least level 6 in the Mischief skill

Have your sim be androgynous

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The End?

Officially, as the rainbow only has seven colors, the challenge is over. However, I felt it was a little weird to not include pink at the very least, since pink is also a very popular color. That’s why, in addition to pink, I created a few extra generations to round out the whole challenge. So if you want to continue the legacy for at least a little longer, you can!

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(Optional) Generation 8: Pink

It’s pink baby! The color pink symbolizes love, affection, nurture, compassion, femininity and success. That’s why, in contrast to all other generations so far, this is the only generation that I made gender specific.

'You’ve always noticed that your parent was not setting the best example. Despite this, you still love them. They're your parent! To you, love, especially familial bonds, are the most important thing in the world. You strive towards having a large, loving family and want to become the best parent you can be for your kids, in contrast to your own parents. In addition to that, you’ve always loved fashion and would draw your own outfits when you were a kid. You’d love to make your passion for fashion your career, but only if your family life allows for it.'

Traits: Loyal / Family-oriented / either Good or Generous (FR)

Career: Style Influencer or Stay-at-home Parent

Aspiration: Big Happy Family or Super Parent (Ph)

The sim from this generation must be female

Complete either the Big Happy Family aspiration or the Super Parent aspiration (Ph)

Either reach level 10 in the Style Influencer career in either branch or be a Stay-at-home Parent

Reach level 10 of the Cooking and Handiness skill and the Parenting skill (Ph)

Have at least one biological child and one adopted child

Have a stronger relationship with both grandparents from Gen 6 than with your parent from Gen 7

Have only one romantic partner for the entirety of your Sim’s life and stay with them until death

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(Optional) Generation 9: White

White. Not quite a color color, but for the purposes of this challenge, it is. It symbolizes innocence, purity, cleanliness, safety and rebirth.

'Ever since you can remember you’ve played doctor with your dolls and teddy bears and begged your parents to buy you the hospital-style dollhouse. Wherever this fascination with health and medicine came from, it made you the caring and disciplined person you are today. Of course, your parents supported you throughout all of medical school and you’re eternally grateful to them. Because of their support, you can fulfill your dream of aiding others whenever they need it.'

In this gen you can choose between two routes: becoming a doctor or becoming a vet. If you only have base game or none of the listed packs, let your sim become an athlete (in this case their purpose is to lead by example on how to live a healthy lifestyle and prevent disease).

Traits: Ambitious / Neat / Active

Career: Doctor (GTW), Vet (C&D) or Athlete

Aspiration: Bodybuilder

If you have Discover University, I strongly recommend you to send your Sim to University, to add to the idea that they’re going to medical school. If you do, have them earn a degree in Biology.

Complete either the Bodybuilder aspiration or the Academic aspiration (DU)

Reach level 10 of the Doctor career (GTW), the Athlete career or register with the ministry of labor as a ‘Vet’:

If you have Cats & Dogs, purchase a Vet Clinic and make that your full-time job

Reach level 10 of the Fitness and Logic skill and the Veterinarian skill (C&D) IF you chose the vet route.

Marry and have at least one child

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(Optional) Generation 10: Black

Last but not least (for real this time): black. The color of power, elegance, death, evil and mystery. A sharp turn from our last generation, in some ways. But don’t worry, this sim won’t be so evil.

'Ever since you were born, people knew that you’d be different. And you were: as a child you often displayed ‘odd’ behavior, and as you got older you were diagnosed with erraticism. However, you also had a very high IQ. One could almost wonder if your erraticism was caused by your giftedness, or the other way around. Either way, you decided to not let your diagnosis get in the way of your dreams, and you pursued a career in science and engineering, subjects you were highly interested in since childhood. You wanted to prove to yourself and the world that having a ‘disability’ does not have to stand in the way of greatness.'

Traits: Erratic / Genius / Noncommital

Career: Astronaut, Scientist (GTW) or Engineer (DU)

Aspiration: You decide!

Since you have the Erratic trait, you may choose any aspiration for this final generation. But make sure to complete it!

Reach level 10 of the Handiness and Rocket Science skills, as well as the Robotics skill (DU) and at least level 5 of the Piano skill

If you have Discover University, have your sim earn a degree in either Physics or Computer Science

Reach level 10 in either the Astronaut career, Scientist career (GTW) or Engineer career (DU)

Build a rocket ship and visit Sixam

Have only one Best Friend (you may live with them or be roommates with them if you like)

Never have any romantic partners and die single

✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦

The End

Thank you for reading and/or playing this challenge. I hope you enjoyed!

#the sims 4 #the sims legacy #the sims gameplay #sims4 #the sims 4 challenge #sims challenge #sims 4 challenge #simblr #sims legacy challenge #the sims 4 legacy #the sims 4 legacy challenge #the sims community

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tj-dragonblade · 5 months ago

Note

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. spread the self-love ❤

Thank you! This is such a hard question! I love most everything I've written, picking favorites is hard, I swear it would be easier to name the ones I'm least thrilled with lol. And just because most of these are Sandman doesn't mean I don't care about my older fandoms either, just that almost always what I'm happiest with writing is going to be the most recent years. Maybe one day I'll go through fandom by fandom to pick a top three from each, or something. But for now! In no particular order, and after much thought, here we go.

When the Chips Are Down from the tail end of my Saiyuki days, published 14 years ago this month. It's comical crack-treated-seriously based on an obscure canon-adjacent factoid and that sort of thing has never been my forte, but I succeeded admirably here if I may say so. It was a joy to write, Jiipu is my favorite and forever under-utilized in fic so centering this around him, around a ridiculous tidbit of info about his counterpart in the original Journey to the West and telling it in his pov was absolutely delightful. I had so much fun writing this one and I'm still so proud of the character voice work I managed in here.

The Thessaly breakup fic from fluffbruary 2023, which I like for having a semblance of plot and because I see lots of talk about what Hob would think of Thessaly but I don't know if I've run into any other actual fics dealing with it. Not that this is the Hob-gives-Thessaly-a-piece-of-his-mind fic that I think we all need, but I'm still very pleased with it. And I just really like the scene of Dream crying on Hob.

Of Cutoff Shorts and Classic Cars. I'm just. So happy with how quickly this one happened, how much it kept growing in the writing and how it turned out in the end. I also laugh at myself for nitpicking over the right British terms for back yard and driveway and such but then I completely spaced using bonnet instead of hood. 😂 Also fun fact this was my first time ever writing oral with a vulva and I'm very pleased with how well it's been received.

The Keeper and the Traveler currently sits pretty high because I've always loved and wanted to write that fairy-tale narrative style and this got pretty close. I don't know if it will still be in my top five by the end of the year but for now, it is.

And lastly will cheat a smidge and say Cruise Ship Boys, because I love both pieces of the 'series' and can't decide which I like better. The porn piece again happened quickly and wrote easily and I'm delighted with how it turned out. The sequel was meant to be one cute-ish little scene to revisit them but snowballed into a whole depressing backstory for Dream and an illuminating look into his everyday life and again, it wrote easily which seems to be a theme with these faves, lol. But yeah. I would love to come back to this AU one day.

#TJs Writing #Sandman #Dreamling #Saiyuki #askmemes

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himluv · 2 months ago

Text

DA Review Series: Absolution

<<< Previous Review: Dark Fortress

This is the part of the list that gets a little... loosey goosey. Basically everything after Blue Wraith but before The Missing takes place in this weird, nebulous, in-between time. We know it's after Trespasser, after the Inquisition disbanded (per my and Bioware's canons) and before Veilguard, but we don't know when specifically. So, since we can't really say when these stories take place in relation to one another I'm just going to review them as I consume them :).

Title: Absolution Writers: Mairghread Scott, Mae Catt, and Tim Sheridan Release Year: 2022 In-World Year: ~9:45+ Verdict: Look. I love this fucking show. I'd watched it at least three times before I decided to do this big tie-in media marathon. And, I just rewatched it three times while convalescing with the flu this past week – turns out it's a very good comfort/sickie show. It does a wonderful job of orienting new viewers while not alienating old timers like myself, is fast-paced and fun, while also establishing a very interesting plot that could be vital to Veilguard. Basically, I highly recommend you commit to the three hours required to watch it.

Absolution introduces us to Miriam, a runaway slave from Tevinter, and her bff Roland (who may or may not be a chevalier?). The two are hired by Fairbanks to join his team for one last job for the Inquisition – steal a magic artifact from the Archon's Summer Palace. That's right, babes, Absolution is a heist story!

So, they team up with Fairbanks (Orlesian human rogue from Inquisition), Qwydion (lady Qunari mage!), Lacklon (dwarf warrior Lord of Fortune), and Hira (Tevinter human mage with whom Miriam has a romantic history), and head off for the city of Nessum. Of course, this is Dragon Age and nothing is ever as simple as it seems.

Miriam's former master, Magister Rezaren Ammosine, is in Nessum. In fact, he's the reason the artifact they're after (the Circulum Infinitus) is even in the city. He's studying it in the hopes of finding a non-blood magic means of activating it. Supposedly, the Circulum can restore life to the dead, resurrecting them to be the same as they were before. And he has a very certain someone he wants to bring back to life – Miriam's twin brother.

Without getting too deep in the details, Miriam and her brother were slaves raised alongside Rezaren, intended to become his bodyguards in adulthood. He claims to see them as his brother and sister, that they all were helpless in the face of his mother's abuse. And for a while the show does a good job of making us wonder if that's true. Certainly, Rezaren seems to believe it. At least until Miriam refuses to play along.

The heist does not go well. Fairbanks seemingly turns traitor, tries to kill Hira, and dies in the process. Hira is trapped in the vault, and Miriam is mortally wounded on the team's frantic way out. In a blood magic-fueled dream, Rezaren lays out his plans to Miriam, in the hopes it will convince her to rejoin him and the reanimated corpse of her brother. And, of course, it all boils down to the Magister's ambitions – he wants to become the next Divine of the Imperial Chantry, where he swears he will work to make Tevinter a better place. And yet, in his power fantasy, Miriam and her brother are still his bodyguards, just as they were trained to be. Even Rezaren doesn't seem to notice how deeply ingrained his view of them as "things" truly is.

So, obviously, Miriam and company aren't going to play nice with that guy. They hatch a plan to get Hira out of the palace, and things seem to be going their way for once. There's a lot of epic fight sequences, Qwydion is hilarious, and the romantic tension between Roland and Lacklon keeps ratcheting up. But when Hira makes a break for the safe house, the team follow her and start to get a whiff of the true betrayal.

The traitor was never Fairbanks (whose loyalty I never doubted!). He caught wind of Hira's true plan – to steal the Circulum from the Inquisition and deliver it to the Crimson Knight in Kirkwall – and was trying to put her down. I will never forgive this show for killing him, btw. I loved him so much! But Hira's real plan is even worse. All this time she'd struck a deal with Rezaren – return Miriam to him, and he'd let her have the Circulum once his ritual to restore her brother was complete.

Side note: Hira is stupid. There's no world where Rezaren actually lets her take the Circulum. None. So, she was willing to sell her (ex?)girlfriend into slavery for something that would never happen. And yeah, she makes a lot of promises about how she would have got Miriam back, how Miriam would have escaped, but we know Hira is a liar and a cheat and just as ambitious and driven as every other "Tevinter snake," as Miriam would say.

Anyway, there's a bunch more badass action involving blood magic, spirits, grenades, and a High Dragon (which again shows that dragon blood is extremely potent in magic rituals!). Roland and Lacklon finally kiss, and Miriam stabs Rezaren in the throat mid-meltdown. It's a beautiful end sequence. And even though the show is over, the team knows their work is just beginning.

Because Hira snuck off with the Circulum in all the chaos, and they know where she's headed. To Kirkwall. To the Crimson Knight... which appears to be a colony of sentient Red Lyrium, formerly known as Knight Commander Meredith Stannard. And she/they/it(?) is intent on seeing all of Tevinter burn. (insert my theories here about how the Blight causes feelings of intense hatred over time, as established in the book The Calling and further exemplified by the tainted Griffons in Last Flight.)

Obviously, I love this series and really wish we'd gotten a second season. There's just so much this show set up, surely we'll see more of team Absolution, whether in another season/show, in a comic or book, or... in Veilguard? Fingers crossed, y'all.

#himluv reviews dragon age #da: absolution #dragon age #miriam dragon age #lacklon x roland #qwydion #fairbanks my beloved rip

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toomanywatchers · 7 months ago

Text

How Steven Lim Impacted Me Growing Up:

I may have joined the Watcher fandom about a year ago, but I have known Steven since the early days of BuzzFeed. That's right, I have always been a Worth It guy since Season 2 if my memory is correct. I have been a fan of food content as some of the many reality TV shows I would watch with my family growing up were competitive food shows a la Gordon Rasmey shows. The thing that differed me from the rest of my family is that I would indulge in YouTube content more than traditional media.

That is why I believe middle-school-me was inclined to click on my first Worth It video; “$17 Fried Chicken Vs. $500 Fried Chicken”. Though I clicked for the visually satisfying display of fried chicken-based dishes, I stayed for a completely different reason. Steven not only crafted a well-organized show while displaying a fun dynamic with his coworkers, and might I add his close friends- Andrew Ilnyckyj and Adam Bianchi- Steven also made a show beyond food and getting to share those experiences with friends;

He made a show to exhibit a wide range of cultures and traditions among various backgrounds masked by the concept of food/cooking for others. Covering a wide range of foods while also traveling to different countries to experience the culture face-to-face, and sharing these experiences with the world via YouTube. For me, a kid mainly watching people goof off while playing video games with each other, a show with so much substance should have not captured my attention at that age, but it did.

Now that I am an adult (of sorts), my appreciation for what Steven has made with Worth It has just blossomed into something real with meaning, and understanding. That same love and appreciation for Steven has tied over into Watcher when I realized he was one of the 3 CEOs of the company. Where, might I add, I see him coming out of his shell even more with Shane and Ryan and ultimately having the creative freedom to make what he wants to make, and make it how he wants to make it.

With the fact that he can create whatever now, Steven still bases his shows on a deeper meaning in understanding all the sides of various people.

Family. Passion. Love. Appreciation. Learning. -and- Experiencing.

Not only are his shows based on this deeper meaning, but he has also shown his selflessness by helping raise money for many charities and speaking out for the Asian and LGBTQ+ community. Let’s never forget too that he put the burden of dealing with the business side of Watcher and putting aside his creative wishes to make sure the company stays afloat. He has done so much for us, the fans, and the one thing this man deserves is our respect.

Steven Lim is truly an amazing guy from what I can see/what others close to him say on his behalf. Along with the few conversations I've been granted to have with him in the obeaver chat on the Wiscord. Steven cares about Watcher so much, and it shows. He has truly inspired me, along with the rest of team Watcher, to push and create. To push myself outside of my comfort zone to better myself as a creative individual, and all in all inspired me to take the leap and actually pursue my dreams in video production.

I hope Steven knows how much the fans love and appreciate everything he does for us, and I hope that one day I can say all of this and more to him in person.

We love you Steven Lim, and we are excited for what you continue to make for us all! <3

#steven lim #watcher #watcher entertainment #buzzfeed worth it #homemade #dish granted #travel season #we love steven lim #steven lim appreciation week #slaw

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wyllaztopia · 8 months ago

Note

My question is: let's imagine that Nightmare had a childhood friend, his one and only childhood friend, and that she was a little girl who liked to fight to protect him and who literally had scars because of that because she literally fought every day to defend him, let's imagine that she survived the "incident", After the corruption of Nightmare how would he be with her? Would he be distant because he doesn't want to remember his past and the fact that he needed someone to defend himself, would he be tsundere with her or would he have a soft spot? Because I mean, his brother did not protect Nightmare because he was not aware of the others who harassed him, but she was the only one who had protected him, in part in any case. sooo.. would he be able to hurt her as much as he would be able to hurt Dream? After all, it's not as if she had protected Nightmare from absolutely everything, because as you said, it's not the only reason why Nightmare became corrupt and there were many others who added up.

ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ (i love that enoji-)

I really love your version of Dreamtale! Joku doesn't give any more news so I have trouble orienting myself with Dreamtale’s story, but you show a whole new vision of things with Soulsborne! The philosophy you gave to Nightmare is much more complex than that of the original but I really hope that Joku will develop Dreamtale in the future! And we're counting on you for Soulsborne and his development 🫵🏼

thank you for such kind words omg this version of dreamtale literally came to mind when me and @neotxnic were reading the original dreamtale comic after we had a session of elden ring - it was also around the time i was delving deep into the dark souls trilogy lore. i wanted to add more depth and tone to the world of dreamtale and fromsoft games have really good story telling and lore so i wanted that to reflect on our revision of the story. note that i'm not trying to compete with joku and the original dreamtale. i think the original is good as is and very fun + heartfelt to read. on anotherrrr note - this will be a really long response to the initial question so buckle up because i will lore dump.

For this specific scenario, I won't make this character's insertion into the lore canon yet - I actually want you lot to share your opinions on the addition of Nightmare having a childhood friend.

Nightmare and Dream were both born from the roots of Motus Arbor (the Tree of Feelings, the very being of Nim or what's left of her). The two of them are task to guard the tree - Dream guarding the negative apples and Nightmare guarding the positive ones.

Dream sought out to the people, he believes that through guarding the tree, he also has to guard the feelings of others. Thus, he often travels around the kingdom where he does his best to help his people have a brighter day.

Meanwhile, Nightmare keeps to himself and guards the tree while Dream focuses on their people to keep their emotions stable. He usually sits by the bed of motus arbor and reads books under its huge shade.

Because of Nightmare guarding the positive apples and the stereotype people have formed of him being the guardian of negativity (despite Dream's attempts to let people know that Nightmare isn't a bad person), many other kids would go behind Dream's back to harass Nightmare and accuse him of taking advantage of the positive apples.

This happens often but Nightmare never paid mind to these claims or mistreatment. Because of his pessimism being influenced by the positive apples that he guards, he's more of a realist (pessimism-leaning) - and so he doesn't see much value in the bullying.

However, a young girl around his age would stand up against the bullies, speaking up about their prejudice and unfair treatment. She called them out about how their judgement held no merit because they didn't know Nightmare personally, what right did they have to come to such conclusions about a person?

As the kids went away, Nightmare told her that there was no need for her to stand up for him since he wasn't affected by the mistreatment. He was perfectly fine simply ignoring the flock. She shook her head at his statement,

She told him her belief that passiveness won't progress society to a better environment. If we simply ignore the bad, does that make us good? Does that stop the evil? Does that stop the dishonesty? How will a wrong become a right if nothing is done for it to be so?

This philosophy was quickly dismissed by Nightmare; "Fighting fire with fire never bears any good fruit."

Despite their opposing ideals, this girl would pursue a friendship with the dark prince. She was true to herself despite how different their worldviews are but somehow, some of their morals were seen to overlap - such as their respect for intellect and honesty. The two both found enjoyment in books and being less social. It was a blissful friendship where they didn't feel the need to be someone else and the other was perfectly fine with it.

However, the conflict between Dream and Nightmare happened. Nightmare saw that Dream was being mistreated by the other kids, that they were abusing his kindness - and he hid his feelings from his very own brother, Nightmare. The guardian of negativity slowly realized that Dream's ignorance and selflessness - whilst spreading happiness… it was happiness given the wrong way. It was a clear imbalance.

And for the first time, he'd heed his friend's words: something had to be done. - and as for how nightmare would treat this friend of his in the present time? well, he holds no attachments. he had already stripped himself for any positive feelings towards anyone - including the very friend that pioneered his current ideals. however, deep down, he respects her integrity - a thought lingers within him that she'd understand his plans if one day she were to find out. however, if he finds reason to, he'll kill her with his own hands.

#lore dump #way too long waaay too long #long post #agdt #ag dreamtale #ardent gospel #wyllaztopia rambles #dreamtale au #nightmare sans #dream sans #ask

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poemnic-tarot · 1 year ago

Text

Intuitive Channeled Messages For You

1-2-3

4-5-6

(Disclaimer : This is a general reading please only take what resonated. For entertainment purposes only)

These are short messages I channeled without card, just intuitively. Please let me know what you think, I’d love to know!.

( Art designed on Canva )

🍰 🌸 🍬 💫 🍉 You Are Loved 🍉 💫 🍬 🌸 🍰

Pile 1 🧸

"You begin to get what life is all about. Every incidents, now you realised, was not a coincidence.It was meticulously planned for you to get here. Where you are today. Every road lead you here where you can see it all from an objective point of view. And you get it, you finally got it. You would not be confused no more, you trust the universe unconditionally. You will go where they lead you. There are fears of course and doubts and hesitation, but they would never stop you from vibrating in a high frequency, a vibration of love and compassion.

You used to be scare, all the time. Scare of life, of people in it, of all your choices, was it the right choice?, did i made the wrong one?.Why is everyone against me, why is the world against me?. Now you realised, it was just all karmic, it was designed specifically for you. So you could learn your lesson and move up. Ascend and become who you are today. Wise, at peace and more trusting than ever. Trusting of life, situation and most importantly, yourself and your choices. What you went through got you here today and you will be forever grateful. To the Divine,to yourself and your soul, for leading you home finally.

Poem: Sorrow To Joy by @cant-find-my-name

This big transition came through

A revelation

Firstly, we changed our beliefs

Reevaluate our wants and our needs

What makes us happy?

Who values we are following

Who we are without the things we do

Strip away all the unnecessary

Let go of pointless worries

To truly turn joyful

First, we shifted our energy

In this new me, being joyful

Is very easy

Song : Coming Back For You by Fireboy DML

Well I pray that the universe Gives you way more than you deserve When the tears fall like shooting stars Remember who you are Just look up to the sky you'll see

Well I pray that the universe Gives you way more than you deserve When the tears fall like shooting stars Remember who you are Just look up to the sky you'll see I'm coming back for you

🍰 🌸 🍬 💫 🍉 You Are Loved 🍉 💫 🍬 🌸 🍰

Pile 2🛍️

“I can still recall what happened vividly. The memories would never leave me. In a way, it shaped who I am. I identified with what I went through. All of it, the good and the not so good. I appreciates all the good times, all the good people. I wish them well and I know they would do the same for me. I am on a new journey. Honestly, I have no idea where I am going, where am I headed to?.It seem not that important to find out, I figure I'll just start step by step into the unknown. I’m willing to, in a way, I was waiting for this moment. Hoping for it in fact.

It seem I had shaded my old skin. Despited remembering everything that happened. I want to changed. I want to rebuild, I want to become something else. It not because I hated my old self or anything, in fact. It's the opposite. I love my old self very much, but I think it’s just time. Time for me to discover a new side of me that’s different. That the world have never seen before. I am excited, nervous but not scare at all. Which I'm thankful for, I want it to be a fun journey, learning about myself, who will I become. I love every versions of me, the old and I'm already sure that I will also love the new. I guess it's my new purpose in life, get to know thyself again and I'm looking forward to meet me.

Poem : Shooting Stars by @cant-find-my-name

My eyes Shined

They reflected the distance light

I’ve never pray so hard in my life

Wishing for a living dream

Wishing to know

What does all the pain mean?

Trying to find the reason

The universe put me here

And I can’t -

Find the reason

Even as stars shimmered

And shoot down

It is me that has been earth bound,

I can’t go back

I can’t go home

The limit is getting too loud

Going aimless

Wandering about

Maybe it is time for me to discover

Reach deep within me to know

How far did I come from?

And how far can I go?

Song: I'm Still Here by John Rzeznik (Treasure Planet)

I am a question to the world Not an answer to be heard Or a moment that's held in your arms And what do you think you'd ever say? I won't listen anyway, you don't know me And I'll never be what you want me to be

And what do you think you'd understand? I'm a boy, no, I'm a man You can't take me and throw me away And how can you learn what's never shown? Yeah, you stand here on your own They don't know me 'cause I'm not here

And I want a moment to be real Wanna touch things I don't feel Wanna hold on and feel I belong

🍰 🌸 🍬 💫 🍉 You Are Loved 🍉 💫 🍬 🌸 🍰

Pile 3🍑

“It's the people that loved you for who you are that helped you made it. They were a voice telling you not to give up, even when you wanted to. Even when there was no more reasons to go on, you think of the people who loved you. And in a way, their love for you saved you, when your own love wasn’t enough.

But you are still not out of the wood yet, but you're not scare of it no more. You are not scare to be alone anymore. People are your strength and there's experiences of that, but they are also your weakness. The world is more complicated and more than one dimensional and frankly, it's giving you a headache. You just want to live a simple life, a minimalist, no complication, alone in a forest surrounded by nature. You want your wood to turn into a forest. And build a cozy cottage to refuge there when the real world is too much. But most of your life, it's a graveyard of regret and it's full of shadows that you rather ignore. However, no more of that you finally decided. You pray for life to get better, for yourself to get better and in a way, you did not see a way out of it alive.

But in those darkness, you saw light and that light has led you to where the sun shined through. You can see better days," the monsters turned out to be just tree". There are better days, healthier ways to live. And in a way, you want to find that out for yourself. There are alway balance in life, you must remember one thing. When there's darkness, there is also light. When you encounter one the other will also find you. When you experienced one side, don't be scare to face the other. That is how you learn, that you will alway be okay.

Poem: Invisible Force by @cant-find-my-name

Something is choking me

The invisible force

Stronger than what's real

Maybe the scariest thing

Are what we're all thinking

Not necessary the truth

Or what happened

But what could have been,

It's scary to see

What isn't there

The affect is real

But the enemy aren't here

Song: This is me trying by Taylor Swift

I've been having a hard time adjusting I had the shiniest wheels, now they're rusting I didn't know if you'd care if I came back I have a lot of regrets about that Pulled the car off the road to the lookout Could've followed my fears all the way down And maybe I don't quite know what to say But I'm here in your doorway

I just wanted you to know That this is me trying I just wanted you to know That this is me trying

🍰 🌸 🍬 💫 🍉 You Are Loved 🍉 💫 🍬 🌸 🍰

Pile 4🍇

"Peace will find you, no need to seek it. It's there for you to tap into it, anytime, anyplace. No need to acquired more to get it. The misconception that you need this or that in order to feel whole. It a misconception, you only need one thing child. And that is yourself. If you have yourself, all of you, the dark and light part of you, the side you loved and admired and the side that make you look away. All parts of you deserve recognition. They are you and yours alone, so we got to honour them. Every part of you love you and want your attention and want you to acknowledge them. Let us finally do that. Let us look into the mirror and see ourselves finally.

We are a pure soul, there is nothing wrong with us, no matter what people implied. We are not broken, we are whole. Your soul is intact, it is there for you to go back and connect to it. Your soul is waiting for you to answer its calling. You heard it but you ignore it because life get in the way, but, if you're trying to find that fulfilment. That feeling of, aww there it is the thing I'm look for?, as annoying as it is, it is that part of you that you wouldn't dare look at.

Poem: Surrendering by @cant-find-my-name

Surrendering my sorrows

Surrendering to my flaws

If there is no Perfection

I would be perfect

Nitpicking my visions

Aiming for the best

Left behind a broken body

And an anxiety ridden mind,

Right path don't do that

Peace is not a compromise

Tis a birth right

Just like how everyone will die,

Getting my soul back

Revived my forgotten joy

Everyday supposed to be precious

Not wishing for it to stop

Song : Back To Beautiful by Sofia Carson

They say You're not good enough, you're not brave enough You should cover up your body Tell me, watch my weight Gotta paint my face Or else no one's gonna want me

Why do we say this to ourselves? And even worse to each other? Why do we say this to ourselves? Ooh

We gotta, get back to beautiful Gotta, get back to beautiful All these words, starting wars Over who can hurt who more Gotta, get back to beautiful

🍰 🌸 🍬 💫 🍉 You Are Loved 🍉 💫 🍬 🌸 🍰

Pile 5🍰

"Something is changing, you can feel it. More internally rather than externally. But it's changing all the same. But you're not scare or excited. You are just neutral about it. But there is that part of you that goes, Finally. Because lately, nothing evokes your interest.The desires you had once feel ill fitted. When you realised that nothing really matter, not in a depressing way, but more of a freeing way, You accepted that as truth. You are not satisfied in life, yes, but seeking more things will not do either. You don't want more per say, but there's something missing that you don't know how to put into words. The missing piece might not be tangible, might just be intangible things that you can't hold onto. Which way should you headed towards when your inner compass is kind of confused.

Forward is the way, you will never be lost, as long as you keep moving forwards and not stop. We will not rush either. When we are in a confusing state, we must take our time and experienced our moment fully so that there won't be a lapse in our memory. Memory is a tricky thing, if you think too far into the future or the past as you experiencing the present, then your present becomes filled with memories from the future or the past. So the present moment will never exist. Be careful of letting moments passed you by, it is alright to not know why you are feeling this way. It is alright to be confused or sad or even unsatisfied. It is alright to be in that state in your present because whatever you are feeling at the moment, the present will eventually become a past.”

Poem: Renewal by @cant-find-my-name

There is hope in this world

In words that you said,

Even though it's a lie

You tell yourself it'll be okay

Maybe not now

Definitely not right now

But hopefully someday

You begin to notice the yellow

In dandelions,

How it shine like gold

In certain light.

Now you finally see

The colourful sky

How many shades of it

Changed with time.

How every poem you write

Begins to rhyme

And you know there's a reason for all this

Every little bit of it

So whatever happened

Do not resist

For you shall learn to embrace it

Song : Take A Chance by Flume

So you feel all your powers unfold

Stretching our big wings while the white is turning gold So tell your story baby, don't give up, just let it all go out You're quiet wishing for something now

Will you be the one to take a chance? Have demands, spill your heart Will you be the one to take a stand Make the girls dance Spill your thoughts Will you be the one to take a chance? Have demands, spill your heart Will you be the one to take a stand Make the girls dance Spill your thoughts, will you?

🍰 🌸 🍬 💫 🍉 You Are Loved 🍉 💫 🍬 🌸 🍰

Pile 6🌙

"The unlimited possibility you seek is there for you to tapped into. Your believed is everything, so be careful what or who you believe in. Miracles exist, just look into a mirror and witness one. Look into your own eyes and wondered who that soul is. For it is you, but there so much you don't know about yourself, yet. Instead of feeling bad about that, we should feel excited. For it is a privilege to know thyself. Know your limit and your unlimited possibilities. How many grains of sand on the beach, that is how much your potentials lies. What you can achieved in life is up to how much you are opened to recieved.

My dear, you are magnificent, I wish you can see yourself through my eyes. How you hold on to life, wise beyond your years. Give it everything you got, no matter what that is, is such a human trait even gods envied. Every difficulties you go through know that those got nothing on your willpower to get through them. You are a strong little human, whose hope is bigger then the universe.You believe in the better, better days, better life, better energy for this earth. And your hope/light is what is keeping this planet alive. Keep believing in your power, because you are powerful. And loved by many.

Poem: Home Coming by @cant-find-my-name

My Divine Mother gentle touch

She taught me so much

By being nurtured we grow

By being loved we thrive

By being connected

We become part of the Divine

I know you look at yourself

And see a scare child

Darling, that's quite alright

Cause you are protected, alway

All the flaws should be

Embraced

There's no need for harsh judgment

Gentleness to ourselves is what

We should aim for

Realise what's important

Now look at yourself one more time

And see the true core

Song: Hummingbird by Metro Boomin & James Blake

Hummingbird, summer sun, has it brought my life back? Hangin' in the balance, have you brought the light back? And how long's the night shift? She's sure I get away with Realizin' she might be all I need in this life

When I saw a cold snap, I wasn't with the season Attack was on the airport and outside there was a season In here paper walls are pushing back on you like Eventually you push through, the moment that you realize

And hummingbird, I know that's our time (That's our time) But stay on, stay on, stay on with me And hummingbird, I can never unsee What you've shown me, stay on, stay on with me

🍰 🌸 🍬 💫 🍉 You Are Loved 🍉 💫 🍬 🌸 🍰

🍑Thank you for reading! I would love to know what you think. See you soon!!!🧿

🍏Check out more of my Original Poetry at @cant-find-my-name or my IG Poemnic

🍉Check out my YouTube Channel for more Pick-A-Card Reading : Poemnic -Tarot

🍊Donate

#pick a card #tarot messages #tarot reading #messages #poetry #writing #channeled reading #channelled message

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kur0m1sblog · 2 years ago

Text

Bubble Baths.

Pitch Black X Fem! Love/Cupid! Guardian! Reader

SUMMARY: Y/N and Pitch are soulmates, according to Y/N. Since she is after all the guardian of love and beauty, A.K.A Cupid. She knows who’s soulmates and not, they were in her little lair and after having some “fun”, Pitch decides to give her a nice bubble bath and treat her like the beautiful guardian she is. Without knowing, the other guardians went to visit you and instead spied on you and Pitch. Seeing how desperate he is for you and how much he loves and worships you.

WARNINGS: The guardians spying on you and Pitch, implied smut I guess? That’s all I guess! 💋

꘎♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ♡꘎

“Uhhh! P-pitch I-I’m gonna!” You cry out loudly as pitch presses soft kisses to you’re cheek.

“Cum for me, sweetheart.” He spoke softly, and that was it for you. That was also the end for Pitch as he started to let out ribbons of his seed into you, moaning your pretty little name.

You and Pitch take a few deep breathes as he pulls out of you, his semen spewing out of your pretty hole. “Oh god Pitch, I love you so much.” You manage to get out as Pitch picks you up over his shoulder, and lays you onto the satin pillows that are still neatly laying against your bed frame. He lays you down, after making sure your comfortable he speaks up.

“You know my beloved?” Pitch starts. “I’m surprised you do. Y’know being the Guardian of Love and Beauty..? And me of course being the boogeyman.” You blink at the words he’s saying, he’s surprised you love him..? You turn your back around to face him on the other side of your bed. “When we first met, goodness I just couldn’t take my eyes off of you..Or bring myself to even lay a finger on you. You were perfect, not just you’re looks or anything, but when we first started to actually know each other. I started longing for you,” He says looking deep into your eyes and suddenly holds your hands in his. “You’re everything I’ve ever dreamed of, but I’m still so shocked that you love me, even when you’re not supposed to. You disobeyed their rules just for me..” He says. “And I will never forgot that my darling, I love you too. Much more than you.” He purrs into your eyes as he sits up then suddenly starts tickling you.

He enjoys hearing you giggle, it’s brings him so much joy. “Okay! Baby, stop tickling me! Ahh!” You scream laughing trying to get his long fingers off of your ticklish spots.

He stops ticking you for a second and picks up by your thighs, “Let me show you how much I love you by treating you like the beautiful guardian you are darling”. Pitch says as you wrap your legs around his thin waist, and proceed to kiss him on the cheek.

He takes you to you’re bathroom decorated beautifully in hearts and colors that match you perfectly, and starts a bubble bath for you. L

꘎♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ♡꘎

“I think we should maybe talk to Y/N again and apologize.” Toothiana speaks up.

“Why should we? She’s disobeyed us by listening to what she thinks is right and getting together with that good for nothing piece of-“ Bunnymund tries to finish but North cuts him off.

“Don’t finish that, look maybe Y/N has disobeyed us but don’t you think what they have is true love?” North asks looking at the rest of the guardians. Sandy nods rapidly, creating a silhouette of you and Pitch kissing each other and holding each other close.

“Look why don’t we go visit Y/N and talk with her about it and we’ll all be happy again!” Tooth says blissfully.

꘎♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ♡꘎

“Okay we are here now, do you guys think she’s here?” Tooth asks.

“I know for a fact she is, whenever she here she has that waterfall of her’s running.” North says pointing to a waterfall on the side of your ‘lair’ glimmering in the light.

“Okay, okay, whatever let’s go in now.” Jack presumes, as he pushes open the heart shaped door to your ‘lair’.

“Y’know this is different from what it used to be..” Bunnymund says, somewhat hesitant to go farther into your ‘lair’.

“Oh calm down Bunny! It’s not big deal!” Tooth says flying around your ‘lair’ looking at tiny trinkets of yours.

“Guys is it me or do you feel like Pitch is here..?” Jack asks, looking around deliberately.

“Of course he is going to be here Jack, I mean cmon’ those two are dating!” North says patting Jack harshly on his back.

“I’m gonna go look in her bedroom to see if she’s there guys!” Toothiana says flying away quickly. “You guys go look around somewhere else, okay?!” Tooth shouts as she flys off.

꘎♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ♡꘎

Pitch places you into the bubble bath, and lights a few candles and brings in a bottle of champagne with two glasses. “Ooh a little fancy for a bubble bath don’t you think baby?” You say teasing him slightly.

“Only the best for my girl.” Pitch says pouring the bubbly alcohol into the glasses. “Cheers, sweetheart.” Pitch coos as you both tap your glasses together and drink away.

“Now lay down in the bath my love and let me take care of you.” Pitch says as he now enters the bath with you and sits behind you. He grabs your shampoo, and pours it in one of his hands. Then placing down the bottle and rubbing the liquid in between his palms. Now rubbing it into your hair, massaging your pretty hair and scalp. Making you grow relaxed.

“Y’know you take the best care of me right, Pitch?” You say looking up at him tiredly, and pressing a kiss to his jaw.

“Of course I do, who wouldn’t want to treat a beautiful woman like a goddess?” Pitch says making you smile up at him.

“God your so sweet.” You say as Pitch lowers your hair into the water, getting rid of the excess shampoo in your locks. “As sweet as candy.” You speak.

He then proceeds to condition your hair and do the same process again. Once he’s done he moves onto washing your body. He pours you’re favorite body wash on your heart shaped loofa, and rubs it against your soft skin everywhere. He gets on the other side of the tub, and lifts your calve up and starts scrubbing away admiring your beauty. As he is done, you notice he didn’t even wash and clean himself this whole time. He washed you up. “My love?”

He hums yes, “Why didn’t you clean yourself?” You ask, raising an Eyebrow.

“Well because I just wanted to take care of you silly, I always do. And you come first before me sweetie.” He says wiping the bubbles off of you’re cheek and kissing it. “I’ll take a shower in a bit when you’re all cozied up.” He says lifting you out of your bath, and wrapping a towel around your figure. He then proceeds to put lotion on you, and brush your hair. Doing the normal self-care things.

“Pitch?”

“Yes darling.”

“You know I love you..right?” You speak looking up at him as he places you into you’re bed.

“Of course I do.” He says placing a kiss on the top of your forehead. “Now rest while I go take a quick shower, okay.?”

“Okay, I love you.” You speak, feeling your heart drop and blush as he stares at you the same way.

“I love you too sweetheart .”

꘎♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ♡꘎

As Tooth enters the room, she doesn’t hear the bath running. But she did hear Y/n and Pitch having a conversation.

“Guys I found her but she’s talking to Pitch I think.” She says awkwardly.

“Well that’s fine, because we need to talk to her urgently.” North say walking to your room looking for you, the rest following his lead.

“Wow, since when did Y/n smoke..?” Bunnymund says holding up a box of ‘Eve Lights’ and looking at her glass flower cigarette tray.

“Hey atleast the girl knows those are the fancy ones.” North says chuckling.

They walk around her bedroom looking at her stuff until they stumble across the bathroom, hearing giggling.

“Maybe we shouldn’t go in there, maybe Y/n’s bathing..?” Bunnymund says as his cheeks flush.

“Oh cmon’ Bunnymund, it’s not everyday you get to see a hot chick y’know naked?” Jack says hitting his arm playfully.

“Cmon’ don’t talk about Y/n like that guys.” North says sternly as he walks into the bathroom.

The rest follow in, and they all see a sight they’d never thought they would. They spot Pitch washing Y/n’s silky hair, “God you know I spoil you like a princess right, my love?” Pitch says pecking her cheek.

“Wow, this is this some cheesy romance.” Bunnymund says faking a gag.

“Yes it is, oh em her! They are soooo cute!” Toothiana says squealing in a tiny whisper. Her wings start fluttering.

“Oh gosh this is so gooey, hey you know we can use this as blackmail~” Jack says giggling slyly.

“No we aren’t those type of guardian, Jack.” North speaks.

Sandy smiles making tiny sand images of them in the bath, Pitch blowing away the bubbles in her hair, and laughing.

“I never knew Pitch had this side to him,” North says somewhat puzzled. “Well know we know that he does” Jack says rolling his eyes.

꘎♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ♡꘎

Sorry if this wasn’t the best, but it was the second story i’ve made! Thanks for reading babes! 💋🫶🏽

#pitch black x reader #implied smut #rotg pitch black #fluffy #bathing #y/n x pitch black #soulmates #spying #rotg sandy #north rotg #rotg tooth #Spotify

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yumenotambourin · 4 months ago

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do all 3 mouses for the character ask or im shaving elfilis 🪒🪒🪒

I'M SORRY I WAS TRAVELING YESTERDAY AM I STILL IN TIME TO SAVE THEM???

🩷First impression🩵

Elfilin

Very cute! I thought he was quite bland before release already, but I was like 100% sure that it was because the twist was gonna be that he was mass produced.

And then after finishing the game I had a little phase in which I hated him because he was super fucking plot important, yet he didn't do anything and this made me angry, lol

Forgo

As soon as my eyes landed on it, I thought it was Elfilin after some horrific experimentations. But then they showed the actual Elfilin lmao. I thought it was really cute and I didn't want to fight it, thank god it transformed before we fought it. Then I was just awestruck.

Also my mom randomly asked me what it was and I didn't know what to say so I just said something like "a mental parasite species"

Elfilis

The first thought that crossed my mind after seeing them was "oh god they have my exact favorite color scheme I'm gonna be obsessed with them, aren't I?". Breathtakingly beautiful, of an angelicity(?) never seen before from Kirby. Throughout April 2022, I occasionally woke up in the morning wondering wether they were just a dream. The fact that something like them existed in the Kirby universe was astonishing to me.

🩷Impression now🩵

Elfilin

I still think he's severely underdeveloped, but I'm more cool with that now. He's cute and silly and fun, he's a nice contrast to Forgo, and generally an adorable sidekick. Tho I wish there was more of him.

Forgo

Baby. It's very cute, strikes pretty well the balance between creepy and goober, and the superior gemini in my opinion. I like putting it in situations :3

Elfilis

A MOUS!!! As magnificent as the first time I saw them. Except they're now my muse, my guardian angel. My view of them has kinda shifted from "stereotypical perfect lifeform" to "the embodiment of life itself", which kinda recontextualizes them, especially given how hard each mous fought to stay alive, and I find that very inspirational.

I love Elfilis.

🩷Favorite moment🩵

They don't have that many moments so uuuuh

Elfilin

Finding the Light! Perfect way to end the mouces' arc, and goes to show how much of a sweetheart he is.

Forgo

The iconic "everything shall be consumed" is iconic

Elfilis

The only thing that they do, their boss fight 😭 it's stunning and I find myself replaying it more often than normal

🩷Idea for a story🩵

Elfilin

Definitely a plotline where they tackle that he can learn something from Elfilis and/or Forgo as well. I don't like how y'all treat him like he's perfect.

Forgo

I'd like to see it getting used to living a normal happy life :3 the baby has suffered enough

Elfilis

ELFILIS PROLOGUE PLEASE!!! About how they attacked earth and stuff and their capture and maybe even Neichel cameo!!!

(I will not let you forget about Neichel)

🩷Unpopular opinion🩵

Elfilin

As I said before, I hate when people make him out to be this little goody-two-shoes without a single flaw who's juts the embodiment of niceness and kindness and will always do the right thing. Like no??? It's not all black and white! Let him be a proper multilayered character! Let him make mistakes and learn from others! Let him learn from his literal other half!!!

Forgo

Whenever someone says that Forgo is Elfilis an angel loses their wings. Starting from the fact that the game heavily implies if not downright states (I'm on plane I can't check I forgor) that Elfilis = Forgo + Elfilin, why would anyone choose to take two different characters in different situations with likely two different outlooks (ELFILIS WAS SPLIT INTO TWO FOR THE ENTIRE FUCKING PLOT!!! ELFILIS HAS THE HERO OF THE STORY INSIDE THEM!!!) and reduce them to a single, more limited being? Plus, most people with this headcanon are also the "Elfilis/Forgo is pure evil and an irredeemable monster!!!!" people who also really piss me off. Like yeah okay YOU chose to headcanon the traumatized baby and the insane mous as the same character. YOU are the one taking away all the nuance they could possibly have. Also as I said before THATS A TRAUMATIZED BABY!!!

Elfilis

I strongly dislike the headcanon that Elfilis absorbs other creatures into their dna. I feel like it ruins a lot of the charm they have, at least for me, by making their ethereal presentation be stolen from other creatures rather than it just being who they are. Also, while I am a Good Elfilis defender, I love the idea of them destroying planets for fun. It just goes to cement how otherworldy and above it all this creature is. So yeah, I feel like this headcanon takes away a lot of their appeal for me personally.

I also don't like when people make them always angry and grumpy, like do you realize half of them is Elfilin?

🩷Favorite relationship🩵

This is entirely headcanon-based as the mouces don't really interact with anyone besides Elfilin with Kirby

Elfilis and Elfilin and Elfilis and Forgo. More than the three of them together, I prefer each baby mous with Elfilis on their own.

I'm gonna briefly summarize my hc dynamics for them cause I love mice.

Elfilis and Elfilin - Elfilin

As I said before, Elfilin's feelings on his big sibling are very conflicted. On one hand, he feels safe with them, and looks up to them. On the other hand, he fears them. The fact that they just wipe out planets without second thought disturbs him. Although he'd never admit it to himself because he loves them so much. Elfilis, however, is very much aware of Elfilin's feelings. And as much as they're devastated by the guilt of having hurt their little ones so much, they dismss Elfilin's compassion as naivete due to his young age and time spent with the beasts. They're sure he will outgrow it one day and see his superiority, ans in the meantime they remind him that he's their little one and that they'll always love him.

Elfilis and Forgo - Forgo

Forgo sees itself as nothing but a temporary form of Elfilis, unworthy of being seen as anything but. And it's not taking this whole "coexisting with the actual Elfilis" all that well. If the actual Elfilis exists, what purpose does Forgo have? This sends them down an existential crisis. Elfilis doesn't like that. And they're desperate to help it break free from these beliefs. Also, Forgo always saw Elfilis in a very idolized way, as a ruthless monstrous destroyer. But that's not all there is to Elfilis, they can be a little silly sometimes. And Forgo is SEVERELY disappointed. It often calls them an idiot and then feels bad about it because nobody should be reproaching the almighty Fecto Elfilis. Also it exclusively refers to them as "Great One".

🩷Favorite headcanon🩵

Elfilin

Can I be honest? No fucking clue. Maybe that Elfilis teaches him how to fight?

Forgo

I'll make it quick so as not to repeat myself, that it sees itself as nothing more than a temporary form of Elfilis.

Elfilis

The idea that they have no motivation is very important to me. Specifically that they do things purely out of enjoyment. That they're just a force beyond our comprehension who sees everything as insignificant and is just trying to have fun.

ALSO THAT THEY LOVE EACHOTHER VERY MUCH!!!

#ask #Fecto Elfilis #Elfilis #Elfilin #Forgo #gatorade #I WROTE HALF OF THIS AFTER NOT SLEEPING FOR TWO DAYS IM SORRY IF SOME THINGS ARE WONKY I LOVE MOUS #also it's mouces not mouses #/SILLY

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idlerin · 1 year ago

Text

nonsense — bonus: unsent letter #1

[n/n],

i know i don’t deserve to call you that anymore, but it’s one of the only things i can keep doing to feel as if i was still close to you. as if you were still my [n/n], my [name].

i don’t deserve you. i know and it’s pathetic, it’s all my fault. i don’t deserve the time, the effort and the love you gave me. it’s cowardly, the way i’m writing a letter that you would never be able to read anyways. again, i am a coward, and an asshole, and a jerk and admitting all that will not make my mistakes any lighter.

i thought of you today again— while i was in a meeting with these directors and producers and it was all so surreal working on bigger projects that i couldn’t help but think about that time when we drove off to that picnic grove when you held my hand and you said one day i would get everything that i ever dreamed of because i was one of “those people” and that it was only natural, and i only laughed and kissed your cheek because at that time you looked so irrationally cute and i was convinced you’d be here to see these goals of mine come true, but now, without you to celebrate these things with me made me feel kind of empty inside haha.

i remembered that you told me that day too that you would love to receive handwritten letters since you watched it in historical romance movies and thought that it was sweet and romantic for someone to do. i regret only doing it when i can’t give it to you anymore without worrying about crossing boundaries.

boundaries i caused myself. i really am very selfish, and you should be with someone who is less selfish that would be better for you than i could ever be and yet if i had the chance or choice for you to not enter my life in the first place i would and could never choose to do so cause i would never i could never ever stay away from you.

ironic as how that’s what i’m trying to do now, but if i was really staying away then you wouldn’t be on my mind all the time.

cause if time would turn back to before we met but i could still recall all the things that happen in the future. before you started tutoring takeru, before you had the courage to give me your gift, before you approached me.

i would seek you out first, and i’d try to make things better that time around.

i’d try to make myself better for you.

but it’s too late for that now.

i miss you

i love you

i miss you

yours, truly

tooru

series masterlist | chapter one

nonsense ! an oikawa tooru social media au

synopsis. you were oikawa tooru’s #1 fan, until you became his #1 hater. you hated him so much you went viral on twitter (accidentally) and literally became known as “the oikawa tooru hater”, doesn’t help that he keeps fueling the fire by subtweeting you. everyone is all in for this new drama. what isn’t known to the public, is that this particular drama’s been on hold for three years (him being your ex and all).

a/n — the demons prevailed also bOO make things better THIS time around boi ! (he does but wtv tbf hes very sad this was like uhm a month after he moved) also i uhm forgot which chapter i mentioned that oikawa wrote her letters but i wrote it on the fun facts lol

anyways lets all sing 🎵 the letter i received from u 2 weeks ago i noticed a comma in the middle of a phrase, it changed the meaning 🎶

#haikyuu #haikyuu drabbles #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu smau #hq x reader #oikawa tooru x reader #hq #oikawa tooru #oikawa tooru x you #haikyuu angst #— nonsense.#hes so down bad #yk theyre like the trope when u think u love ur so more than they love u but its like the ither way around #s/o*#other*

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matthewsgreybubbles · 6 months ago

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Do you tend to believe the stuff DeuxMoi posts about Matthew? There was a whole section about him in the newest podcast and the stuff they said was upsetting :( DeuxMoi read old dm's she got about him. Basically they are saying he is ONLY nice to you if you are a fan but treats everyone else like shit. This one dm she read, the girl claims she went on 2 dates with him, dinner and a movie, and it was fine. The third date, he asked her to come to his house. She had broken her foot between the 2nd and 3rd date and he knew bc they texted about it. But when she got there, she saw him standing on his porch and he didn't bother to go down to help her and watched her hobble and limp from her car up his 25 steps. She also said when they kissed, he licked her whole face and it was really bad and sloppy and that she's sorry to ruin the wet dreams of Spencer Reid for fans. Another dm was a girl claiming that 4 years ago, her roommate had been "talking to" (aka sleeping with) Matthew for a while and when she went to work that night, she found out he actually had a serious girlfriend and had been cheating on her. She said he's a sneaky sneaky snake.

What do you think about all of this? What is your opinion? I know that on Deuxmoi's instagram and on the podcast, it states "statements made on this account have not been independently confirmed. This account does not claim information published is based in fact" and there was a whole Reddit discussion about how everyone there on Reddit knows that DeuxMoi is actually full of shit, posts anything anyone submits without fact checking it, etc, but that the people on Instagram hang on her every word and believe everything she posts. Also, anyone online can say literally anything about anyone and the majority believe it. I'm just venting. What is your take on this whole thing?? :(

Ooh I never heard about Deuxmoi or the podcast so I might not be the best one to talk.

But.

I have my beliefs about MGG that I'm not necessarily going to share here because I don't want anyone to come and insult me again.

But (x2).

Never forget that these celebrities we idolize are no better than anyone. They have their flaws. Some of them are good people and some of them are not. It's not all white or all black.

You never truly know someone and especially not those who show you want they want you to see. Just be careful and aware of that.

So yes everybody can say whatever they want online. It doesn't mean that it's true but it doesn't mean that it's not true either.

MGG's not probably as awesome as we all talk and read about here. I'm not positioning myself on that since we don't know more about it, I'm just keeping it in mind.

Come loose about all of that. It's fun as long as you are not too invested.

#mgg #my sweet anons #matthew gray gubler

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msperfect777 · 1 year ago

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OMG WAIT SO. the moment i imagine something, it already exists. so let's say i imagine myself in my dream apartment. it now already exists because i am aware of it. so every time my ego comes up and says things like "it's not real" ,"why is it not here?" ,"why do i not see it?". i just step back and observe those thoughts and not identify w them because they are the ego thus not real (nothing is real anyways LMAO). and i just continue imaging myself in my apartment acknowledging the fact that it already exist while denying my senses because they are also not real? is that it? I HOPE I DIDNT SOUND CONFUSING.

and also am i allowed to affirm like "im in my apartment" because you said thoughts aren't real and they are from the ego. so do i just imagine without affirming? wait if im affirming does it mean im trying to "get" it. because if i were already in my apartment i wouldn't be affirming. WHAT

u got it😘 when you say “continue to imagine” it doesnt mean to like “repeat” ur imagination bc repetition is a loa thing🤓 but i get what you mean.. u continue to imagine bc u realize it is no different than the “physical reality” so why not have fun w it in imagination🤷🏽‍♀️. and ur good it doesnt sound confusing bc u summarized everything perfectly😍. you can affirm if you like but affirmations/thoughts are never real. you can imagine without affirming or do it with affirming it doesnt matter bc if u observe it, it exists period. also, dont forget that imagination is not limited to the visual senses such as “visualization”… you can imagine a scent or a visual or a sound or a feeling etc.

LMAOOO THE LAST PART. ig in loa terms, affirming is to “get”. doesnt matter. nothing is real😍. imagine it and you just experienced it.

#non dualism #non duality #consciousness #nonduality #nondualism #observer

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sethcertified · 2 years ago

Text

「 SCREAM FOR YOU ! 」 . . . 📂 07

scream : billy loomis, stu macher

wrd count : 2.7k

⊹˚.⋆ synopsis . . . [name] breaksdown in stu’s arms

⊹˚.⋆ starring . . . billy loomis, stu macher, & male reader

The sun was bright. To the point it would've blinded me if it wasn't for the giant of a man in-front of me. I thanked the universe for making Stu so tall. It was useful in moments like these.

The two of us had walked around the winding, sidewalk path as we waited for Billy. He had instructed both of us previously to wait to meet him at the video store. As of right now, we were doing the waiting part which was no fun. even with Stu which says a lot, in my opinion.

My impatience was killing me. Questions were sprouting in my mind every passing second. Why the video store? What did he want to talk about? Was it about the party? Was it about me? And that was just the least of my vast amount of questions.

I dug my foot into the heel of my shoe as I yawned, "What's even taking Billy sooo long?"

"Patience, baby. Patience." Stu taunted at me.

"Suck my dick, Stuart."

Stu craned his head back as he laughed at my words. His laugh made a small chuckle escape past my lips.

He turned to me as he clutched my hands in his. The action made my hands tingle. I've had my dreams about holding hands with Stu Macher, but for it to happen, even for just a minute, was sending me into a frenzy.

He sent me a million dollar winning smile, "Guess."

I raised my brows at Stu. If he wanted me to guess, then I would guess, but I was determined to get it right. I wasn't sure why we were going there with the new aura of mysteriousness surrounding Stu and Billy that made me unsure of everything I once knew of the two. I mean, if they had asked me in the past, I would've known why; to get horror movies but now? The only inkling I could have of what it could possibly be for is murder.

"To get a movie?"

"Bingo!"

A smile etched itself onto my face, "Wait, really?"

"Yeah, we're getting Halloween for my party tomorrow." Stu swung me around as he let out small chortles of laughter. My disbelief was overwhelming. There was no way this wasn't linked to their murders, "And nothing else?"

Stu shot me a hesitant look, but didn't say anything. I guess, I had to wait to see what the video store meeting was about since Stu had informed me we had to wait since Billy had some 'business' to finish. I had my suspicions about this 'business,' knowing that Billy was a homicidal psycho, but I refused to let that get in the way of my time with Stu. I needed answers from him that, I know for a fact, Billy would never let me in on. Not to mention, despite him also being a homicidal psycho, I still liked him.

Pathetic, I know, but if you had a tall, funny, extremely handsome guy in your grasp would you care if he happened to dabble in murder?

I for one didn't. Okay, that's a lie. I did. But at that moment, I didn't. I was far too distracted by Stu's courtship to care about his blood-drenched hands.

Stu pulled me aside as the two of us walked into a grassy field. Small remnants of the old, wooden park still rested among the tall, dead grass. The shot sent my brain into a movie of flashbacks. Memories of little kids playing in the now-demolished park flickered in the abyss of my mind. The park was gone, and the grass dead, but the memories of my childhood caused me to overlook the destruction.

Memories of playing tag with the other kids. Hitting and running from each other as we yipped with joy. Running to the monkey bar to see two boys about my age. Memories of helping the scared, blonde boy from the top of the monkey bars as the smaller, brunette boy yelled at him to stop being a wimp. Climbing up there with him until he jumped down. Memories of introducing myself to the two boys before we ran away to play. Memories of going home that same very day with two new friends.

Billy Loomis and Stu Macher.

My recollection was interrupted by Stu yanking my arm down with him as he fell back into the grass. My body stumbled over onto his, falling onto his chest. I squeezed my eyes shut, anticipating the pain of tumbling into a body to come, yet it never came.

"Hey, [Name], woohoo!" Stu whispered in my ear. The raspiness laced in his voice made my knees weak. I opened my eyes to see Stu's face just in front of mine. The sun made his hair look fluffier, and it shone brighter than ever. He was angelic.

"Remember this place?"

His bright, blue eyes connected with mine, and I turned to look away trying to avoid him seeing the love-struck look in my eyes. Eye contact with Stu was intense, it always has been, and with my feelings in such turmoil, I doubt that looking into his eyes would've been any help.

"Yeah, I do. It's too bad they tore this place apart." I said.

"Yeah, it sucks. We had so many memories here."

"Memories of you getting stuck on the monkey bars." I snarked.

Stu flopped his head back into the grass, "Hey! That was a low blow."

I blew my tongue at him, "Bite me, Macher."

Stu grabbed my neck and tore me down with him. A small scream left my throat as Stu pretended to bite my arm. My chest heaved as I tried to fight off Stu. We tossed and turned in the grass; dirtying our clothes.

"Uncle! Uncle!" I screamed.

Stu finally stopped his motions, and I took the opportunity to catch my breath. Small coughs left my gaping mouth. Stu was just watching me struggle to ease up.

I finally was able to return to my normal state. Stu was still looking at me with a look I couldn't quite place.

"What?" I asked.

"You look beautiful." Stu rasped to me.

I froze at his words. The look in his eyes held a depth I was afraid to explore. The genuineness laced in his voice added to that was enough to scare me away. Stu sensed that. He reached his hand to cup my cheek, "Is something wrong."

You murdered Casey Becker and Steve. I like you. You might murder me. Billy might murder me. Billy is.., God, I can't even get into Billy right now. I like- no I love you. Billy is infecting me with his presence. I might love Billy. I can't love Billy. I can't love you. Why do both guys I have feelings for have to be murderers?

That's what's wrong.

I kept my mouth shut, and my thoughts to myself. Stu was begging me to speak; however, with the want in his eyes. His want to know me. To know what's wrong.

"Nothing, I'm just tired." I lied.

I felt Stu move around as he repositioned himself from besides me, "You can talk to me, [Name]. I'm here for you."

Damn you, Stu, and the way you can see right through me!

My lip quivered as I pondered over how I should respond. I didn't want to hurt him. I would never want to hurt Stu.

"[Name]?"

"I just hate when you guys do that."

"Do what?" Stu replied.

"Do that!" A small wince escaped me as my shoulder blade rubbed against the skin of my back as I lifted my arms up in frustration. A physical injury to add to my emotional ones. The emotional punches I had been taking lately were taking their toll, and I could feel my emotions getting ready to spill out to Stu.

"What is that?" His voice was small and confused , and I knew at the sound of it I would cave in. Stu moved in to grab at my hand once more, and I felt his fingers intertwine with mine. Stu was my weak spot.

"Act like that! Like you love me. I don't even know how to feel about you and Billy, and when you guys say or do stuff like that it isn't helping. It makes me rethink everything!" My fingers clenched his as I continued, "It feels like I know nothing about you. All I have is theories, ideas, possibilities! And when you guys do stuff like that it just makes me create more theories and ideas and possibilities."

My eyes pricked with tears as I looked up at the bright, blue sky, "The worst part about that is that I love you! I love you and Billy. But I shouldn't. You're- you're murderers. You could kill anyone I love at any moment. You could kill Tatum or Dewey or Sidney. Fuck, you could kill me! For all I know, this romantic shit is just some trick, so you guys can get away with this in the end."

I sniffed, "Because of that I'm not even sure what I mean to you. Ever since Casey's murder, I have had so many doubts about us. About everything I knew about us. That I was so sure of. With Billy too! It's like one moment, I'm so absorbed in you two, and I full-heartedly believe you love me as I love you, but then I second guess myself! It's like I'm a toy or a ploy for you guys to get away with this. Or that you're just stalling to murder me 'cause the time isn't right. I don't know what to think or feel or do when I have nothing solid to fall on!"

Tears began to fall down my cheeks as loud sobs left my mouth. Everything I felt had finally piled to the point where I needed to explode.

"[Name], it's not like that. Not at all." Stu moved his hand to wipe away my tears, "I'm not good at this type of stuff, you know? But I love you, and I know, even though Billy is acting weird, that he loves you too. He's just that way. He was with me! And Sidney! Even his dad. Ever since his mom, it's like he doesn't know how to feel things without them being fake. I can't tell you everything, and I know that sucks, and that's the only thing you want, but I can tell you one thing. None of that is true. You're our boy. Our final boy."

"But why me? Why not Sidney or Tatum? Literally anybody else in this hell of a town!"

Stu moved to rest his forehead against mine, "Because it's you. It's always been you."

Our heavy breathing tangled together at the proximity. I wasn't sure what to say, but the look on Stu's face assured me that everything he was saying was true.

"When I walk into school, the first person I think of is you." Stu ran his fingers up my arm.

"When I go to sleep, the first person I dream of is you." His fingers ran along my shoulder until his hand stooped at the crook of my neck, wrapping his hand around it.

"When I wake up, the person I look forward to seeing the most is you." Stu cupped my cheek with a tender smile.

"Even when I'm with Tatum, you're the person on my mind." He pressed his lips against the corner of mine making my stomach explode with butterflies.

"All I can think about is you."

Stu traced my lips with his before placing his lips against mine. It was far different from the kiss I had shared with Billy. It was full of tenderness and romance. His lips spilled secrets that words couldn't even describe. My hands tugged in the scruff of his hair as we deepened the kiss.

I fell on my back into the grass as Stu clambered on top of me. Our lips remained attached despite the drastic change in position. His knee was placed in the space between my spread legs which made more than one place fill with butterflies.

I pushed against his chest ever so weakly, trying to catch my breath. Our chests bumped against each other as we caught our breaths. Stu's eyes were half-lidded, and the light blue color of his irises seemed to have darkened.

"Does that give you the answers you need?" Stu whispered to me.

"Yes," I whispered back.

Stu nuzzled his head into my collarbone, lightly nibbling on it as he groaned, "Thank God."

I let out a small chuckle. Tears still rested on my cheeks, but I felt better than I had in days. It wasn't the answers I was looking for, nor was it the way I ever thought this hangout would go, but I was grateful for the experience nonetheless.

It had given me the stableness I needed. At least, with Stu it did. Billy on the other hand did not give me any stability. Just more baseless theories about what I was to him. I couldn't let him downplay my mood though when I could make the most with Stu.

I pulled myself into Stu's chest. It felt magical finally being in his arms. He wrapped his arms around me, and I hummed in satisfaction. This was right.

My eyes closed, and I could feel myself start to drift away into a sleep state. The soft beating of Stu's heart pounding on his chest against my ear lulled me into a sleep.

I could've cared less for the fact we were in public or that Billy would interrupt us eventually. All I cared about was being with Stu.

My sleep didn't last long with Stu shacking me slightly as he pulled his arm away from shielding my body. I looked up at him to see him bring his phone to his face. He flipped the phone open, and moved it closer to his ear.

My sleepiness paralyzed my hearing, and I could only pick out pieces and bits of information from the call. At most, I knew that it was Billy and that he was on his way and that he had finished something. My intuition felt it had been something murderous knowing Billy.

Stu dipped his head down to my ear as he stuffed his phone back into his pocket, "Hey, sleepy head. We gotta go."

"But I don't want to," I whined.

"As much as I wish I could stay here, and keep you in my arms forever; I can't. We have to go meet Billy."

Stu pulled me up with him, and I stumbled around in the grass a bit. Stu wiped the grass off of his clothes, and I rubbed the sleepiness away from my eyes.

"Your ass, man!" Stu laughed.

I felt myself scowl at the fact that my ass was covered in grass. Stu moved up behind me and began to pat down my back and wipe away the grass the decorated my clothes. His hands reached my ass, and he; surprisingly, wiped it away with no funny business. He moved further down and cleared the grass from my pants.

Stu stayed right behind me as I cleaned the front on my clothes. The act got rid of my leftovers sleepiness once and for all, "Alright, I'm ready."

"Before we leave I have to do one thing."

"What?" I questioned.

"This!" Stu slapped my ass, and I felt my reflexes kick as I whipped towards him, "Stu!"

He just giggled like a mischievous child before shooting into a sprint. I immediately shot right after him. Stu's long legs quickly overtook my lack of athleticism. I stopped as Stu became a small dot in the tunnel of my vision.

I tried to catch my breath as I kneeled over my knees. My chest felt lighter, but I wasn't 100% sure about Billy and Stu. Things weren't adding up, and I still needed answers that both boys refused to give me. I would just have to go figure it out between now and the party. Which wasn't giving me too much hope.

I stood back up as I caught my breath. There wasn't much I could do with my lack of knowledge and resources, but I kept my goal intact.

As much as I hated the fact the only thing I can do for now is hope for the best.

✎ notes . . . yes, this is a repost. tumblr deleted my old acc >:( ⟡ . ⛪ ◦ ✺ 06 ⇿ 08

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