#also fuck you to whoever lied on the schedule claiming that it’s very empty

[idk-my-aesthetic]

Respectfully if you are on a train and take up a table seat and don’t even use it I am eating your phone

[sunkissedpages]

We’re Only Kidding Ourselves- Part Twenty || Tom Holland x Reader

A/N: TWENTY PARTS BABY IT’S YEAH BOI HOURS

Prompt: Enemies to lovers au (from @marvelellie‘s 1k writing challenge!!)

Summary: You work as a production assistant for the Spider-Man: Far From Home crew, or rather as Tom Holland’s handler. The two of you don’t get along very well to say the least, but you won’t quit and he can’t fire you so you’re stuck with each other.

Warnings: swearing, SMUT, anxiety

What I listened to while writing: my mamma mia + rap playlist... don’t ask

Word Count: 3.5k

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Part Seven | Part Eight | Part Nine| Part Ten | Part Eleven | Part Twelve | Part Thirteen | Part Fourteen | Part Fifteen | Part Sixteen | Part Seventeen | Part Eighteen | Part Nineteen

You dropped your bags at the door and sighed, finally alone after so many weeks. You took it all in for a moment before pushing your suitcase into the middle of the room to unpack. You had just gotten the zipper undone and the top open when there was a knock at the door.

You paused, considering pretending you had already gone to sleep, but it might have been one of your crew members who needed something for tomorrow so you got back to your feet and made your way back over to the door, flicking on the lights on the way over so whoever it was wouldn’t think you were weird for just sitting in the dark.

Without looking through the peephole, you flung the door open completely open, which wasn’t the smartest move for someone who wasn’t actively trying to get murdered, but you were too tired to remember basic safety precautions. It was Tom at the door anyway, freshly showered, hands in the pockets of his sweatpants.

“Can I come in?” he asked, looking at the floor.

You stepped aside and let him pass you. He looked around briefly, smirking at the mess of your suitcase on the floor.

“So,” you began when he didn’t say anything. “Do you need something?”

He turned around and blinked, as if he had forgotten he needed a reason to come see you. “Oh yeah,” he said, scratching the back of his neck. “Um, do you have a hard copy of tomorrow’s schedule?”

You felt a frown tugging at your lips. “That couldn’t have waited until morning?”

“Sorry. I uh-“

You brushed past him and walked over to your backpack where you shuffled through it in silence, vaguely aware of how Tom was nervously tapping a sock-clad foot on the carpet as he waited. You found a copy of the schedules you’d been given in the back of one of your multicolored binders and tossed it at him, not being able to help the laugh that escaped you when he fumbled for it.

“Thanks,” he said with a small smile.

“No problem.”

When he didn’t move to leave you realized he probably also wanted his sweatshirt back, but didn’t want to say anything about it in fear of being rude.

“Oh right, sorry.”

You pulled it up over your head, feeling your T-shirt ride up to your bra with it as you did. It wasn’t anything Tom hadn’t seen before, but you felt your cheeks grow warm just the same as he watched you. When you finally pulled your head out of the sea of fabric you saw that he was blushing slightly too, even though yesterday his mouth had literally been on your boobs.

You passed the sweatshirt over to him, but he didn’t lean forward to take it.

“You can hold on to that,” he said, making you squint in confusion.

“But, I already have Harrison’s.”

“If you can find it.”

“I didn’t lose it!” you insisted.

Tom held up his hands. “Never said you did,”

“You implied it.”

“Well, you should hang onto it just in case.” You shrugged and hugged the sweatshirt back against you. It was still warm. “I, uh, also just wanted to let you know that I told Harrison and Harry that I hooked up with that girl I already lied about again, and that’s where I got the, uh, hickey from.”

You were surprised he’d addressed it at all. “Did they believe you?”

Tom made a sound that sounded like something in between a laugh and a scoff. “Yeah, you don’t have to worry about that. They don’t think I’m very discreet about these things.”

“And what do you think?”

“What?”

“Do you think you’re discreet? About your... conquests?” The word tasted bitter in your mouth as you said it.

He looked at you hard. “You weren’t a conquest.” It wasn’t an answer.

You stared back. “I never said I was.” Tom ran a hand through his hair like he wanted to say something snarky back, but was refraining. “Did she get a name this time?”

He looked back up at you with venom in his eyes. “What are you talking about?”

“The woman you lied about sleeping with. You said you ‘didn’t catch her name’ last time, what about this time? I don’t know how believable it is to sleep with the same girl twice without getting a name.”

He cocked his head at you. “Lauren.”

“Oh.”

You weren’t sure what you had been expecting, but it wasn’t that. You felt a twinge of jealousy over this imaginary girl Tom had coined off the top of his head. She got to claim the hickey on his neck, the purple bruises on his hips that no one knew about except for you, the fucking wink, all of it. You wondered what Tom calling out Lauren sounded like. If it fell off his tongue easier, if it would sound more desperate, more enthralling.

You took a deep breath and trained your eyes on the floor. It was official. You were in over your head. You were jealous of a girl that didn’t exist. Still, the fact that you’d never be able to tell anyone you had been the one to make Tom gasp and pant, the one to leave pretty marks like that all over his skin, to hear your name through his gritted teeth over and over bothered you more than you’d like to admit.

“Anyway, I just wanted to say I was sorry about the airport. I just wasn’t thinking.”

“You fucking winking at me across the room seemed pretty deliberate.”

Tom crossed his arms and gave a little shrug.“I- well, I knew it’d get under your skin, but I didn’t mean to stress you out.”

You relaxed a little. You had thought he wanted to expose what happened between the two of you to the world, but if he really was just being a dick like usual, you knew you wouldn’t be able to stay mad at him. “It’s all sorted out now.”

“I just figured I owed you an apology.”

“Seems like you’re always apologizing,” you said tiredly, crossing the room and flopping onto the bed.

Tom grinned sheepishly. “I do a lot of dumb shit.”

“Can’t argue with that.”

You laid flat on the bed, staring out the huge window beside you. It was getting late, but you wouldn’t be able to tell by looking outside. The colorful lights of the billboards were still blinding and the streets were full of traffic. Life went on even as the night was winding down. You kept waiting for Tom to tell you goodnight and let himself out, to be left alone with your thoughts, but that never came. You sat up on your elbows and saw him leaning against the dresser, also looking out the window.

He turned when he felt your eyes on him. “Is it okay if I stay here for a little while? My room is just so... empty.”

If he had asked the same question three months ago, or even three weeks ago you would have kicked him out of your room. But you only smiled softly at him and gave him a small nod. You hadn’t had much of a chance to be by yourself yet, but you suspected you would have felt the same way once the reality that you were alone set in.

You were so used to always being with Tom that it was strange when you weren’t. At first, trying to sleep with him only inches away from you had been difficult, but it had grown to be a comfort, and sleeping alone was going to have to be an adjustment. It was almost like he’d become an extension of yourself and you were annoyed you’d let yourself get attached.

You had told yourself that admitting you didn’t hate Tom anymore to yourself while he was inside of you had been the equivalent of shouting out “I love you” while in bed with someone for the first time. A heat of the moment thing. But you couldn’t kid yourself like that.

“Yeah, I’m just getting ready for bed. It won’t be very interesting, but you’re welcome to stay.”

He settled in the desk chair while you flitted around the room, unpacking your toiletries and essentials, brushing through your hair. The silence was comfortable, almost domestic. Tom gave you space to do your thing while he went over his lines for tomorrow morning. Watts had called him out for getting lazy with them so he was trying to be better. You knew he hated for people to think he didn’t think he took his work seriously so it was likely he was going to keep himself up all night rememorizing everything verbatim.

You walked into the bathroom and grabbed a travel size pack of makeup wipes from your bag and brought them back into the room so you could look in the bigger mirror next to the tv. You rubbed at makeup on your face and neck, trying not to pay attention to how tired you looked underneath. One of the reasons you didn’t like to wear makeup often was because of how it made you feel when you finally took it off. When you had it on you felt confident, like you could fool others into thinking you had it all together. But when you took it off at the end of the day you were just... you again. You glanced at your reflection and bit your lip at what you saw. The dark circles under your eyes and angry red blemishes on your forehead were familiar but unwelcome. You pushed the thoughts to the back of your mind and moved to your neck, revealing the hickeys that had gotten even darker as the hours passed. You rubbed hard at them, willing them to fade to nothing. The alcohol from the wipes combined with the pressure of your hand was beginning to make you skin sting, but you kept going. Maybe if you rubbed aggressively enough they’d disappear.

“Hey, stop you’re going to hurt yourself.” You hadn’t even realized Tom had come up behind you until he’d taken your wrists in his bands to stop you from rubbing your skin raw. You wondered how long he’d been watching you.

You dropped the makeup wipe on the dresser in defeat and sighed, sinking back into him. Tom held you like that for a minute, sliding his hands from your wrists to your palms where he traced designs on them absentmindedly with his thumbs. You made eye contact with him in the mirror and knew you were fucked. When he looked at you like that it was hard to convince yourself he didn’t care about you. He let go of your hands and turned you by the shoulders. You hung your head as his eyes raked over your face in concern. He put his fingers to the marks on your neck gently, going from one to the other like he was playing connect the dots.

“I’m sorry about those,” he whispered so quietly you almost didn’t catch all of it.

“Don’t be,” you said with a gulp, positive he could feel it with the hand he had on your neck. “I like them.”

“You don’t have to lie.”

“No, I do. It’s just-”

He lowered his hand back to his side. “What?”

“It’s hard to pretend like it never happened when I have all these to remind me.”

“Then don’t pretend.”

“You know I can’t do that. Everyone would-”

“I meant don’t lie to yourself.”

“Who said I was?”

Tom shrugged. “Just had a feeling.”

“Is that what you usually do?” you asked. “You’re honest with yourself about this kind of stuff?” You pushed past him to toss the makeup wipe in the trash.

“Not usually, no,” he admitted with a guilty smile.

“What qualifies you to give me advice then?”

“Just don’t want to see you make the same mistakes I’ve made.”

You thought he’d elaborate on the ‘mistakes’ he was talking about, but he didn’t. You didn’t press though, he’d share if he wanted to.

You took another makeup wipe from the packet for your collarbone and was much gentler wiping the foundation and concealer off this time. When you were done and looked back up Tom was back on his phone.

“I’m pretty much done getting ready for bed. All I have to do now is shower.”

He locked his phone and stood up from the desk, figuring it was time for him to go back to his own room. “Okay, I’ll head out then.”

“Oh, you don’t want to join me?” you asked, feeling your heart thunder in your chest as you did, only half aware of the words coming out of your mouth. After all the regret this morning, it shouldn’t surprise you that you were right back to where you started, but you were having a hard time believing it was really you saying those words out loud.

“Are you serious?” He raised his eyebrows at you, but you could see the interest spark in his eyes.

“Showering alone is overrated,” you said with a confidence you didn’t know you had.

Tom smirked. “I’m game if you are.”

He followed you into the bathroom where you turned on the shower faucet and then turned to face him. You didn’t know what to say. The water still had to heat up which left you standing in the bathroom fully clothed with the guy you’d promised yourself was a ‘one time thing’.

“After you,” Tom said cheekily, sensing your hesitation.

Without further thought you stripped your shirt immediately, eager to get on with it. You felt your face grow warm as Tom stopped to gaze at your body, eyes traveling down the valley of your breasts to your stomach.

Last night had been dim and dark, but now in the fluorescent light of the bathroom he could see every inch of you, and you weren’t sure how you felt about it.

“Fuck, darling,” Tom said hoarsely, boosting your confidence immensely.

Tom was next to discard his shirt, ripping it up over his still-damp curls with ease. He dropped it on the floor and moved towards you.

“Can I kiss you?”

You nodded and closed your eyes as he pressed his lips to yours. Your nerves began to dissolve as Tom kissed you. You felt yourself relax into him and moan as he slipped his tongue into your mouth.

You opened your eyes again when you felt him fumbling with the clasp of your bra behind your back and let out a giggle.

“Sorry, I’m a little distracted,” he said defensively as you swatted his hands away and unclasped your bra yourself.

“Don’t sweat it, Tommy.”

He rolled his eyes at the nickname, but you felt him tense against you at the same time.

You wiggled out of your sweatpants and underwear unceremoniously, knowing the water must be warm by now. Tom yanked his sweats down next and you held back a laugh as he tripped over them just like you had this morning.

He laughed with you and kissed you again, bringing a hand to your hair this time and tangling his fingers through it.

“Tom, I just brushed my hair,” you protested against his lips.

“Not my fault, you’re irresistible,” he whispered back.

“You think you’re so smooth.”

He brought a hand down to your core quickly and then held it up for you to see. “Seems to work on you.”

“Fuck off!”

“Ready?” you asked, nodding to the shower.

Tom put a hand in the water stream and immediately yanked it back. “Shit that’s hot!”

You put your own hand under. “It’s not that bad, stop being such a baby!”

“Y/n, it’s scalding it’s going to melt my skin off.”

You rolled your eyes. “You’re so dramatic, you know you don’t have to shower with me.”

Tom scoffed and jut his lip out. “You know I want to.”

“Ugh, fine.” You turned the temperature down the tiniest bit and raised your eyebrows at Tom before he finally got in the shower, offering you his hand to help you step up.

You turned awkwardly so that you were under the shower head and Tom was standing in front of you. He stood with his arms crossed, huddled in the corner.

“You’re cold now aren’t you?” you asked with a sly grin.

“No.”

“Here, stand under the water for a second,” you offered, stepping to the side.

“I’m fine, y/n.”

He was so fucking stubborn. “As your handler, I’m saying you have to stand under the water and warm up. No Getting around it.”

He rolled his eyes, but traded places for you for a second, letting the hot water run over his body. You watched with hungry eyes as he rolled his neck and tensed his muscles under the shower head before trading back with you. “Got anything else you want to handle?” he growled.

You brought a hand to your temples.“I regret this so much.”

“Regret what?”

“Taking this job.”

Tom laughed as you took the bottle of shampoo in your hand and squeezed some into your palm.

“What are you doing?”

“Showering! I told you I have to shower,” you said with a laugh, lathering the shampoo into your hair.

“Ugh that’s no fun.”

“Well while you’re here, why don’t you make yourself useful and hand me that?” you asked, nodding to the body wash behind him.

“Alright, love, I’ll be useful.” he agreed, but took a step closer to you instead of grabbing the soap.

Just as you were about to ask what he was doing you felt his fingers on your hips and gasped. His hands danced down to your inner thighs, higher and higher until he was right where you needed him. He massaged your clit with a wicked grin as you attempted to focus on washing the soap out of your hair.

“Fuck, Tom,” you cursed, fighting the urge to shut your eyes.

You reached behind him for the body soap yourself, nearly collapsing into Tom as he slid a digit inside you at the same moment. The actual showering part was a challenge as Tom fingered you and whispered sweet nothings in your ear.

Once you gave up on being productive you gave in and began to stroke his cock as he moved his fingers in and out of you at an excruciating pace.

“Fuck, y/n, shit,” he panted as you sped up.

You were nearly leaning into Tom with all of your weight now, but he didn’t care. You desperately wanted him inside of you, but you weren’t sure if you were strong enough to hold yourself up like this. Not to mention the fact that you were already teetering on the edge like this, just with his fingers.

Tom came first, all over your legs, shuddering and calling your name as he did. You weren’t far behind as his fingers trembling from his own climax brought you to your own. You leaned on his shoulder and bit your lip to stop yourself from crying out as he held you through it.

“S-sorry about your legs,” Tom apologized when he’d caught his breath a little.

“S’okay.” you said with a tired smile and quickly washed your thighs again with some body wash.

You dried off together in silence, still spent. Tom put his clothes back on while you wrapped your hair up in a towel and rifled through your suitcase for a clean pair of pajamas.

“Hey, I was thinking,” Tom said, speaking for the first time in a while as you wrung your hair out with your towel.

“Yeah?”

“Do you want to...maybe keep doing this?”

“What, the sex thing?” you asked, throwing the towel on the desk chair.

Tom blinked. “Yeah, uh, the... the sex thing.” He took a deep breath. “If you’re down for it, that is?”

“Yeah, okay,” you said unsurely at first, but felt a little more confident when you saw Tom light up.

It was silent for a second and for just a moment you let yourself wonder if he had meant something else.

“Well, I really should get back to my room,” Tom said, clearing his throat. “We have to be downstairs really early in the morning.”

“Right, yeah, of course.” You nodded along with him, the weight of what you had just agreed to settling on your shoulders.

You walked Tom over to the door, wondering if you should hug him good night? Or kiss him good night? Or fist bump? What did... acquaintances with benefits do?

When he got to the door he put a hand on the handle and turned to you. He opened his mouth to say something just as there was a knock on the door. You gave each other looks of confusion before he looked through the peephole and opened the door.

You hadn’t been expecting anyone this late, especially not Harrison. But there he was, looking extremely confused when he saw Tom answer the door. You saw him wonder if he had the wrong room until he saw you standing (more like cowering) behind Tom.

“What are you doing here?” he asked.

“I was just leaving,” Tom said with a smirk.

hi um I have mixed feeling about this but here ya go!! also gotcha it was kind of both of them at the door yeet also this is the never ending day I swear this day has lasted three parts in this fic I’m sorry I write so slow also this probably has lot’s of typos but lmk what you think I always appreciate feedback!!

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