#also feel so bad for my mom
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found out shit today and im having a nervous breakdown
#i dont javr any one to talk to#theres my sibling#sorry im always venting here im so pathetic hahah!-!-!#idk what to do lol#ive jist been crying#vent#im so lost wtfff hahahaha#also feel so bad for my mom#fuckkk ahahhahaha
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#dungeons and dragons#dnd art#dnd character#dnd oc#drow#warlock#dandelion treehollow#feeling not good so i drew the good boy#(goodness up for debate)#he is rather dog like in loyalty though#loyal to the party but also loyal to a bad master (his mom)#i am struggling to make art lately eh#drawing him smiling all sweet as i debate whether i should have him have to rip a tooth out to summon his magic book back#edit oh my god i forgot his eyeliner it's been fixed#sorry dude
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Wait you guys are actually buying Disney products I thought it was a joke
(READ TAGS FOR FULL CONTEXT Sorry it’s long dies
#Honestly I’m only bothered bc I feel partially responsible (WTF EGOMANIAC OVER HERE)#I know I can’t control other people’s spending habits and my own habits are. Less than ideal !!#But when I wanted to spread my love for Wreck it Ralph I didn’t want people to get that takeaway 😔#IMPORTANT NOTE ‼️It’s okay to express your love for something through buying official things !!! That DOESN’T make you a “bad person” !!!#Still ! I think we have to let ourselves feel bothered by things and we need to be more critical of exploitative companies#Of course I chose to watch inside out 2 with my mom in theaters so I’m not immune lmao. Also using amazon / Etsy … just as a whole#But if you need help finding Disney movies without supporting them please just ask me!! PLEASE don’t use Disney+ if you can avoid it#I know we are all capable of finding our fulfillment from better places. But sometimes it’s hard#Capitalism sucks and yet that’s how we are endlessly pressured to live :(#We’re all at different points in our lives. Sometimes self care involves consumerism#Be hopeful that it someday won’t have to#Txt#again I’m sorry if this comes off as horribly egotistical to even consider being single-handedly responsible for#Social media is bad …. numbers bad…. Distorts reality and your perception of yourself…..#Or as me trying to guilt trip people in any way. Genuinely do what makes you happy but WE CAN BE HAPPIER & HEALTHIER I KNOW WE CAN#Wreck it ralph#Rant#Also sorry I have huge beef with streaming services I don’t mean to enforce that on other people but also. Sharing my opinion
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fwb with satoru that leads to unplanned pregnancy that leads to you keeping it but you and satoru agreeing to coparent because it’s healthier to have a coparenting situation than be forced into a relationship because of a kid except satoru only agreed to coparent because you brought up and he couldn’t stand the idea of losing you before you got pregnant, much less now that you’re carrying his kid and now he’d kinda look like an opportunistic dick if he tried to make a move on you just because you’re pregnant so he doesn’t and it’s torture but he loves you so he’ll do anything to stay beside you but it’s proving to be reaaaaaally hard to just stay beside you and smile when you’re holding your tiny son in your hands and all satoru can think about is how he wants to kiss you call you his wife but you’re not even his girlfriend
#this is also a 30k word 5 chapter au in my head#it’s got a whole timeline from fwb to stopping fwb bc one of you starts dating someone else#and then the pregnancy and pregnancy journey aka satoru yesrning so bad it makes everyone around you sick#and post pregnancy reader feeling down about not getting asked out/technically being a single mom and hiromi sweeps in with all his#gentlemanly manner and satoru is literally gonna throw up but what can he do if ur happy#💌
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! Eight !
#bumfuzzled art#naruto#team 8#kiba inuzuka#shino aburame#hinata hyuga#akamaru#because he’s there too <3#and now for my regularly scheduled rambling#it’s their kid designs because I was feeling nostalgic#also the designs I drew the most#I used to be very into Naruto when sh1ppuden was airing the last few seasons#I think they were my favorite team out of all of them#their dynamic is so good but we hardly see them interact.#specifically always liked shino because I like insects#kinda wished we got to see more of the guy#but alas being sidelined is kinda half of his thing#one of the unfortunate fandoms I joined where I got way too invested in the background characters#also on a drawing related note:#I kinda drew them from memory and then went back to fix the biggest mistakes.#so it’s 100% my bad that certain things look off.#I should have just drawn with ref from the beginning.#I showed these to my mom and she pointed at Hinata and giggled.#quite pleased with that reaction.#she is very cute.
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can you believe this is the same guy
#my art#pokemon rejuvenation#geara#geara pokemon rejuvenation#suicidal ideation tw#FEELS SO GOOD TO BE BACK WOOOOO#i love drawign geara!!! and lately i've been. particularly enraptured. by drawing him younger#(by like 2 years anyway) HES JUST A GUY.... UAUUuggh and i love drawing his long hair.....#''why is little geara crying'' he misses mom even though he knows he shouldnt. bc he hates her.#things were simpler when he was with her. but also suffocating and downright dangerous (looking at sirius) really bad#but still.. hes only 18 </3 just a boy
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How I Think Each Member of the Bad Batch Would Act if Sick/Injured
Hunter- If he’s sick, he’s basically an “if I ignore it maybe it’ll go away” kind of guy. However, I do think if he was injured he would tell someone since he wants to be responsible and lead by example. I feel like it would be hard for him as the oldest since he wants to be strong for his siblings, but ultimately wanting to set a good example wins out.
Wrecker- If he’s sick he will seek out care. Maybe he’ll be a little bit dramatic, but his brothers don’t mind since they get to care for him. I do think he would try and brush off injuries and minimize them, since he’s used to being the strongest and feels like he should be able to deal with it and take the pain. He had to be forced to get examined and take pain meds.
Tech- Would let the others know if he was sick or injured, but after dealing with it first himself. He’d be like “oh I have a fever but I took some medicine so it’s fine no need to fret” or would just appear in the cockpit wearing a wrist brace and his siblings would be like ??? but he’s all like “I fractured my radius so I am wearing this brace; I thought it was obvious from how I fell”.
Crosshair- Would try and deal with things on his own, both illnesses and injuries, and snap at his siblings when they try and help him. Similar to Hunter in thinking if he ignores it maybe it’ll go away. Omega is the only one who can convince him to get checked out, and occasionally so can Echo or Hunter. The only exception to this is if his stomach hurts; he will be complaining the whole time and everyone on the ship is going to know. His tummy hurts and he is not being brave about it.
Echo- Mostly tries to ignore his issues or just tough it out, since he figured he’s dealt with worse so he can deal with whatever this is, but will get help if it’s something that feels more serious. He will, however, accept help and comfort from Omega, no matter how minor his illness or injury is, since he knows it helps her feel useful. Plus he hates to see her worried.
Omega- Similar to Echo in trying to tough it out at first, but she does this out of not wanting to be a bother. However, when one of her brothers inevitably pick up on her not feeling good or being hurt, she will tell them what’s going on and allow them to fret over and care for her, even if she does get a little annoyed at their mother-henning.
#tech’s reaction is based off how my mom acts since she’s a doctor#echo is kind of based off how I act since I struggle with chronic pain so I’m always kind of like oh I don’t need advil I’ve had worse#hunter is also like me because I’m convinced if I ignore how I feel it will go away#I made myself sad with wrecker#star wars tbb#star wars the bad batch#tbb crosshair#the bad batch#arc trooper echo#tbb echo#tbb hunter#tbb tech#tbb wrecker#tbb headcanons#bad batch headcanon#bad batch headcanons
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hello! i really hate doing this, but my state has been going through the worst flood we've had in over 80 years, and i just spoke to my dad on the phone and he told me there's a high chance the water might've reached the ceiling in our house — and if it didn't, it still reached pretty high anyway, as we've been informed —, which means there's a very high chance we lost everything (or almost everything) we own, except for the things we could pack up and carry with us when we evacuated. the area where we live is completely flooded and the roads are closed, and although i managed to make it back to my hometown before things got too bad and am staying at my mom's house where it's safe for now, i'm still dreading the moment i have to go back, and i don't know what we're gonna do and how we're gonna start rebuilding our lives.
so if you're able to donate anything at all (literally anything helps), here's the link to my ko-fi (e se vc for brasileire e quiser doar pelo pix, pode me mandar mensagem que eu mando a chave em pvt)
if you can't help financially, reblogging this post is also really helpful!
thank you and stay safe 💜
#there's also a chance the water might rise in my hometown too lol 💀 so i'm just praying it won't reach my mom's place at least#i feel bad doing this but idk what else to do???#i'm also gonna have to buy a bunch of food to make sure we won't run out bc we don't know when things will be restocked#considering most roads are either blocked for safety reasons or totally flooded#anyway... yeah#this is kinda embarrassing but i'm also desperate so i'm rlly sorry !!
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I'm having a bad mood today
Would you draw my blorbo for me please?
#If you have time/energy/willing for that though. No pressure#Im sad and annoyed bc i couldn't get my blood tasted today#They only signed me up for an appointment in a month#And its already been so long since i try to figure out what is wrong with me bc my stomach doesn't work as it supposed to#I'm tired and hurt and all this is very discouraging#Mom tells me to go to the private lab to get my tests done faster but it costs money and we haven't been having much of those#She says that my health is more important and she's right but i just feel so bad and guilty for spending money on myself#When it is possible to get free medical treatment#But URGHHH the free one is sooo looong#And the problem is also that bc im an immigrant here i often don't understand how the system works here and i do mistakes#Like today I came to the hospital thinking i can get my blood tested right away with my doctors prescription in my hand#But no i only got it registered and got an appointment on 17 of December#Fucking urghhh#Im just tired and frustrated that's all#Anyway#Wanna draw buba for me? 👉👈🥺
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i've seen model steve harrington aus. i've seen child steve harrington aus. i present: child model steve harrington
note: this came from my own desperate need to see this conceptualized and i SWEAR i've searched, i just can't find any content with child model steve so. :(
bc little steve harrington was remarkably cherub-like. his large brown eyes and soft pout ensured endless cooing and fussing from his mom's friends. and when he blushed and ducked his head in shyness, they only complimented him more. when he got home that day, his mom smiled at him.
so steve decided that he would put up with the cheek pinching and the squealing. he sat upright in his chair, sitting on his hands so he wouldn't fidget and ruin the image. because he'd do anything to keep his mom smiling at him. if he was being particularly good that day, she'd let him lay his head on her lap on the drive back home.
but everything changed at his father's birthday gala. a nearly eight year old steve harrington sat prim and proper in his seat, but a smile lit up his face--his cheeks round and his dimples showing up. he raised his hand up to cover his giggle, but he couldn't help but laugh at some silly old man with a loose toupee. then he sees his mom approaching, and his face quickly smooths over, going back to the more polite smile he usually adopted when it came to these events.
he'd ruined it. he hadn't continued being the sweet boy his mom wanted. but then, she smiles at him. and introduces him to the man behind her, who says he's a designer. the man holds out his hand, but when steve puts his hand into his palm, he doesn't shake it. the man simply holds his hand, his eyes scanning steve's face. steve tries not to squirm under the attention. but the man nods and smiles at his mom, and he gives two brief cheek kisses to steve, whispering in his ear "you're going to be a star, darling." steve looks at his mom, confused, but she waves him off to continue talking to the man.
a few months later, steve's mom whisks him off on a trip to france. and steve is so excited to go, nearly vibrating in his seat as the airplane prepares to take off. but instead of the eiffel tower and the seine, steve is taken to a studio. he's posed and changed. once again, he's being fussed over, but instead of wealthy socialites, gossiping make-up artists squeal over him. he's "perfect for the shoot" and "the most darling little boy." steve doesn't understand, but his mom is still smiling, so he lets the nice ladies brush powder over his face.
and he looks in the mirror. his hair is a little more tousled and his lips have a slight tint to them and his eyes seem to take up much of his face. he's put into new clothes, and he feels like a doll in their hands. and when he's put in front of the camera, he simply follows the photographer's directions. afterwards, he's bundled into the car and his mom can't stop gushing about how good he was.
apparently, he's a natural. and then she goes back to fussing over him, focusing more on appearance than his behavior now. but she takes him out shopping and they eat at an upscale restaurant along the champs-elysses. and steve is happy.
and then they go back home, and his mom is so much stricter than before. she has him try out all kinds of different hair products, determined to find the best combination to keep it looking shiny and soft. she controls his food intake and what he wears and makes him use weird creams and serums on his face. but this is what makes his mom happy, so he's happy to let her.
his mom is also on the phone a lot more lately, whispering harshly about the quality of brands and steve just assumes she's being picky about the clothes she buys. later, his mom picks him up and holds him, and asks if he'd like to move to italy. she looks at him intently and it's obvious what answer she wants, so steve nods. she smiles and holds him close, and it's the most loved steve has felt in a while.
so they move to italy, and suddenly steve is a lot more busy. he's put in front of more cameras for more people he doesn't know. but he's smiling and pouting and doing whatever they want him to do. his compliant attitude and polite nature have photographers and designers alike singing his praises, and steve always looks to his mom for approval. but she's been arguing with his dad a lot lately, so she's upset more often than not. but that's okay, the make-up artists are always kind to him.
but then one day, his mom takes a phone call in the middle of the shoot. and when it finishes, she's gone. steve goes back in, close to tears, but the make-up artists still hanging around look after him until a car is sent to pick him up. this becomes a trend. and eventually, steve goes alone to his shoots. he's always taken care of by the crew and someone is always there to pick him up, but it's not fun without his mom there.
but he knows that she's always enjoyed him taking pictures, so he continues to do so, hoping that she'll come watch him again sometime soon. and he busies himself with befriending the chatty make-up artists and the bossy photographers and the eccentric designers. and he's such a cute little thing that they can't help but dote on him.
steve is never catapulted into child stardom, as his mom is picky with his jobs, only choosing luxury brands and well known designers for him. but within the industry, they call him the "little prince."
and then steve is catapulted into puberty, but his intense skin regimen prevents him from getting acne, save for the occasional zit. and his diet and religious exercise schedule help maintain his look. and he's still doing remarkably well, especially now that he's fully aware that he is a Model.
and steve has truly grown into his looks. with time, he's grown more comfortable in front of the camera and made numerous friends. nearly all of them are older than him, but they're fun and loud and it fills up the space that normally surrounds him. and they're the ones who get him hooked on american movies. steve remembers living in america, but he's been in milan so long that everything he recalls is vague.
but he watches them and falls in love with the american high school experience. so when he finally catches his mom off the phone and actually in the house, steve asks if he can go to school in america. and his mom laughs. but steve keeps asking, which devolves into begging. and his mother snaps, slapping him across the face and calling him ungrateful. she cries and begs for forgiveness, cowed into shame by steve's desperate attempt to hold back tears.
and so she lets him go to school in hawkins, indiana. an odd choice, but his parents just so happened to own a property there. (in truth, both of his parents expected him to change his mind within the year). but steve finds his place at hawkins high, because even though nobody in hawkins has ever heard of versace, steve is pretty. he's pretty and charming and he knows the right thing to say. after all, he's spent his whole life perfecting his mask.
and even if his mom ended up moving back home with his dad, leaving steve all alone in that big empty house, steve is happy. he's finally hanging out with people his age and high school is so far removed from the glitz and glam of the fashion industry. and he's settled and content with tommy and carol by his side. while he misses his friends back in milan, steve finds himself longing for the clothes more often. hawkins was certainly the opposite of milan, what with the nearest mall being two hours away and only equipped with a macy's and jcpenny.
through it all, steve is determined to be normal. he laughs along with jokes he doesn't quite get and rolls his eyes at carol's cue, and he joins the swim team. and he joins the basketball team. and he goes to parties and kisses girls and wears dumb little polos with his letterman jacket and does everything that he saw in the movies.
but nancy wheeler is different. steve can't forget his time in italy and who he is and was, and he's reminded of his old life in everyone and everything in hawkins. but not nancy wheeler. she's all hawkins and all his. and then the upside down happens.
and then nancy wheeler breaks his heart.
even after three years, his parents continue to ask when he'll go back to modeling, but he's different now. the upside down and billy hargrove beat that starry eyed little kid who thrived in the spotlight. and nancy wheeler proved that adoration and love is fleeting, so what would even be the point of trying anymore? his dad was a little more approving of steve's retirement/hiatus, saying that steve must want to go to college so he can take over the family business.
but when steve doesn't get into college, he's once again badgered by his mom to go back. but he's grown and changed and he's not sure that he can pretend anymore, so he says no. and they cut him off. enter: scoops era.
the measly scoops salary is not nearly enough to cover all of the new bills and expenses steve has, but he's not willing to leave hawkins. so he reaches out to his friends back in italy, and they refer him to their american connections. steve doesn't model at the same level as before, but he poses for a couple of zines and one artist who got a little too handsy at his exhibition. but he's able to make it through until the mall blows up.
this routine continues and he starts working at family video with robin at his side, but he keeps his side job a secret from the kids, using the excuse of visiting his parents to leave town for his shoots. he's not ashamed, but he knows he wouldn't "be normal" anymore if they found out.
but how does he explain his near mental breakdown at the sight of his healing demobat scars. they're raised and ugly, ruining what should have been a perfect body. and even though he uses scar cream everyday, they refuse to fade away completely. and how could anyone stand to be near such an ugly thing when all his life, steve was meant to be pretty? after all, love and adoration is fleeting.
#steve harrington#give me grace i literally do not know how to verbalize all of my thoughts about this#child model au#imagining them finding out bc jonathan or will was interested in some photography art exhibition and steve is literally the centerpiece#everyone FREAKING OUT#robin knew bc OFC robin knew#steve feeling too self conscious to keep his old ads but he knows his mom keeps a record in her office#dustin screaming crying punching the wall YOUVE BEEN FAMOUS THIS WHOLE TIME... AND DIDNT TELL ME....#mike wheeler feeling ill bc is steve actually kind of cool....#italian steve harrington#because OF COURSE italian steve harrington#eddie munson asking steve if he'd ever consider doing playboy#steve going into a very serious answer about his career projection and actually that's an insult eddie. do u know who i am#and eddie is like yeah ur the centerfold in my heart baby#and then steve gets it#to be so clear. steve's mom DOES love him but she's also extremely selfish#that's why she feels bad when she slaps him and concedes to his request#but once she gets over the initial guilt she's like but he was a STAR i was the mother of a STAR
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When I was little I thought one of our cats Sockan (translation: the sock) was a tiger. She was more bright orange/red IRL too compared to photos
#she had no voice but rather sounded like that one video of a baby lion barely getting a sound out#she demanded to be fed fish daily every midnight on her throne#(an ugly neon green wool? armchair with strange black pattern from the 70s that we couldnt throw out despite it being broken)#(because again that was sockans throne)#she was also a self identified poor little meow meow#and pretended to be hurt to make my dad feel bad so hed pay special attention to her#while acting just fine when he wasnt looking and around my mom#she was born in the super old firewood stove in the kitchen on my birthday 7 years before me#and she drew her last breath at age 21 wrapped in a blanket in my moms lap#out in the garden on the porch swing on a beautiful sunny day#so my mom was right there with her for both her first and last day#the grey cat seen vaguely to the right was her dad bamse#but he deserves his own post.#silvi talks
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bought a lil thing to put my pop it on so I can hook it to my shorts 👍
#omg kiera no one cares#it hangs on my backpack but i kinda wanna have it with me so i can use it i can't use it if it's just on my bag that's just for looks orkid#also bought Kingston a mikey ninja turtles keychain because the book is really for older him and his mom#and so i feel bad if i don't have something to give my sweet boy who i shower if gifts already
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"Rhaenyra isn't the stepmother, she's the mother who stepped up!"
The HOTD writers themselves are hardly doing anything to support that narrative, so I take this rhetoric with a grain of salt. While I think, in some way, Rhaenyra does care for Baela and Rhaena....if I had to point out a motherly figure for them that could pose as someone stepping in Laena's place, Rhaenyra would not be it.
#house of the dragon#hotd#hotd critical#rhaenyra targaryen critical#baela targaryen#rhaena targaryen#this mainly just comes from my frustration with this fandom painting rhae as overly motherly toward baela & rhaena#making it seem like we had so much to go on for her being a good stepmother when it's really the bear minimum#there's more with rhaenys being there for them than with rhae--- both physically & verbally#even with scenes where she's with them: for baela it holds more of political means with her having a dragon and then using her to see corly#like sure she could be concerned about her well-being but it's definitely not on the same level as with her sons#don't even get me started on with rhaena bc that “be a mother to them” line had me 🤬#and her referring to her sons as hers and the pain of sending them away but not adhering to rhaena's emotional needs and feelings of inferi#rity--- like it didn't sit right with me especially when she couldn't even be bothered to hug her#i like to enjoy headcanons about their relationship but the canon material doesn't stray far either#rhaenys raised baela alongside her on driftmark she sought rhaena out when they met after so long#she advocated for rhaena to her husband over joffery--- she's their grandMOTHER that stepped up tbh#tbh i wouldn't really be rocking with my stepmom if she sought after & slept with my dad at my mom & stillborn brother's funeral#barely comforted my sister and i when we were injured in a fight (only her sons)#then got married to said father not long after said funeral...like i'd be pressed tbh!#dni if you can't have a collected conversation about this#rhaenys targaryen#(also just bc im a little critical of rhae doesn't mean i hate her in comparison to others she's not that bad tbh)
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riz gukgak is SO distressing to have as a favourite character I can never funckign rest out here
#not art#smthing abt his character being motivated so equally by truth and fear#and he keeps looking for an institution that'd both help him seek the truth and assuage his fears#with him first being a PI bc his mom was a cop and then a junior agent with blessings from his dad#and hes like on that precipice of realising that its not just the people in the seats its the concept of it from the ground up thats fucked#so hes inclined towards conspiracy thoughts and an end-justifies-the-means pattern of action#like. man. hes just so fucking filled with anxiety. he guards the things that make him happy with ferocity#and the thing is! the world encourages this! every time hes paranoid he turns out to be right#that paranoia that already came from having very little control over a world thats unkind to you#honestly all the bad kids were prime radicalization/cult materials in freshman year but I feel like riz is even More so#theyre so fucking lucky they ended up together like that. there are so many things you can promise a kid#who already had plenty of things taken from and kept from him. a kid with an overworked mom and a missing babysitter#if riz didnt run into the bad kids it would be childs play to isolate him. gods. head in hands I cannot fuckign be here dude#this is why the ''small'' comic I tried to sketch ballooned up to almost 30 panels lmao needed to stuff someof this somewhere#but also skip is my favourite from ASO so maybe I just like experiencing hardship and challenges in daily mental exercises
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The tragedy of ur boyfriends not letting u bite them just a little. As a Treat.
A Tup from @trudemaethien’s excellent fic Edeemi, Baby, One More Time that I drew back in May! I didn’t have a Star Wars tumblr at the time and wasnt planning on posting it anywhere so I forgot about it until now, but I had such a fun time playing around with lighting effects and his expression!
I really love their mer universe and I’m especially fond of Tup’s POV in this fic. It’s such a good job of expressing the confusion and frustration of communication barriers and reasonable, best-intent misunderstandings between all of them, while still leaning into the positive aspects of discovering the world and representing it from slightly different perspective than people normally take 10/10 highly recommended
Closeup of the sketch for his expression under the cut because I was super happy with it
#clone trooper tup#mermay#my art#sw tcw#mermay bc technically i drew it may 23rd or smth#the background is very boring but im ok w that honestly bc i made this for myself to live on my tablet forever#actually i also sent it to my mom and she said it made her happy :)#anyway i vibed so hard w this tup and his confusion/frustration/rejection sensitivity at wooley going hoshit dont bite me#as someone whos Strong Feelings often get redirected into Bite Impulse the twin frustration and disappointment that someone takes it bad?#so real#me and tup shaking hands over partners who let us bite. as a treat.#the sketch i channeled the feeling of going to bite To Be Sweet and ur partner going ‘no!!! mean!’ real hard#like please i am overwhelmed with affection i need to feel it in my teeth#anyway @trudemaethian (sp?) u got me out of a literal years long art slump to start making meaningful amnts of content bc i was so Overcome#so thank u very much and very deeply for that!#in exchange the fruits of me relearning how to use my drawing program
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frank baby boy darling sweetie~🎃
#his cute crooked teeth#his straight teeth now are also pretty#but his crooked teeth before are also just cute and endearing and he’s always gonna be pretty#i’m gonna be 63 lusting over a 75 year old man#i feel like that’s not bad#i mean there’s an 11 year age difference between my mom and step dad#so like#that’s a socially acceptable difference i think#right??#frnkiebby#frank iero#mcr#mcrmy#frnkiero#my chemical romance#frnkie#my chem#ilhsm
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