#also can you tell i like below deck?? can you??? lmao-

[post-office-by-the-bay]

⋆˚࿔ MEET THE COASTAL CREW 𝜗𝜚˚⋆

crew dinners are a must aboard the ss seaduction! (and yes, that really was the name of the ship! i got it from a friend of a friend, okay??) actually, crew brekkies and lunches, too! and, obvi, this is something i carry on to my post office, too! always feel free to pull up a chair and grab a plate. but, it's a bit helpful if you know the crew, right? a friendly face gets you pretty far, huh?

in no particular order, i present to you, my coastal crew, my beautiful besties, my poetic pen pals!

deckhand kiwi ࿐༉༉

bosun flora ࿐༉༉ (@static-symphony-fm)

first mate anya ࿐༉༉ (@puffoz)

stewardess stella ࿐༉༉ (@aezuria)

chef cynthia ࿐༉༉ (@gentlehue)

engineer elise ࿐༉༉ (@starrynightmovietheatre)

sailor isabella ࿐༉༉ (@ssparksflyy)

officer jellyfish ࿐༉༉

pilot emma ࿐༉༉ (@urbanflorals)

second deckhand amanda ࿐༉༉ (@amandamariee)

second mate giselle ࿐༉༉ (@pinkdiorluvr)

second bosun bow and arrow ࿐༉༉

second chef zuri ࿐༉༉ (@canonfeminine)

navigator shrimp anon ࿐༉༉

second stewardess aubrey ࿐༉༉ (@s1utlvr)

cabin girl sunni ࿐༉༉ (@sunnitheapollokid)

second officer emma ࿐༉༉ (@urbanflorals)

third mate film roll anon ࿐༉༉

third chef may-bae ࿐༉༉ (@maybxlle)

second cabin girl snail anon ࿐༉༉

third officer jeanie ࿐༉༉ (@goldierey)

[sugar-petals]

⌈ pile I - QUEEN OF CUPS „i adore you so much“

⌈ pile II - ACE OF CUPS „i’m your lover in plain sight“

⌈ pile III - JUSTICE „i’m the one you deserve“

🔓 select the tarot card that you noticed first.

⌈ NOTE 🌹 ➝ welcome to this extended nsfw reading. at the bottom of the deck i found the 5 OF WANDS (see below cut) so the overall theme is: teasing 😏 let’s find out what it means for you individually in your piles. what steamy thoughts are running circles in your person’s mind? tell me what you got and enjoy 🐝

[ deck used | the wonderful golden art noveau tarot by Giulia Massaglia — gilded example cards below, not the actual piles ]

{ 𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚘𝚝/𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚘 𝚖.𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 }

the FIVE OF WANDS - today’s overall energy is playfighting. 

message. they want to give you a sexual challenge rather than indulging in a soft and hesitant mood: tease them right back and they’ll appreciate it. it’s all in good spirits as long as both play along. boldness is appreciated and keeps the chemistry running. 

no need to fear conflict, this is all friendly banter without the intent of hurting. behind all of that is the idea of testing limits + experimenting sexually through fun and activity rather than keeping it a guessing game what the other person might like. 

pile i - QUEEN OF CUPS „i adore you so much“

⌈ QUEEN OF WANDS - THE EMPEROR - PAGE OF COINS - 3 OF CUPS

Oh hot damn… Lucky in Love or Drunk in Love are the type of lyrics I’m getting from this. Nothing prevents them from thirsting over you lmao but it’s a good thing! Because they’re confident in liking you so. Damn. Much. And they know you like them back. What a secure lover this person is becomes apparent in their ambitions: They reflect dedication. Meanwhile, they’ve got a balance of mature and outgoing/youthful energy alike. And I feel like they really went from being serious in your presence to just letting it all out! Good for them, because they’re on a roll since they met you slash made contact.

The main kink I’m seeing here is teacher and student, hands down. They are seriously into pretending there’s a difference in power, authority, knowledge, age, looks, all of that. Doesn’t have to be real, it can be roleplay, but they do consider you to be someone to look up to. They pleasure themselves like mad to those thoughts, honestly. The Daddy or Mommy kink is real in this one because whew, QUEEN + EMPEROR? That’s a big deal. You two are either two bold personalities coming together (or they fantasize about that, some major powerplay) or they identify you as that person who pulls all of their strings with little to no effort. Far from intimidated, they are ready to learn and enjoy because they’re your babe.

This person is not a starfish though. Happily under your spell, I can see them quite actively horny because wow Pile 1, their sex drive is just impressive, to say the least. Not scattered, just very strong in general. And they see you just like that as well. They know you are in charge, they feel that you’ll handle the shit out of them without hesitating. Boss of their body is what I’m hearing! Not an inch will belong to anybody else. They love how madly possessive they are.

At the same time, they also think you can learn together, it’s not so set in stone. I like that contrast in the cards. Sovereignty and mature sex versus being carefree and raunchy like a student party. Like they want you to pounce on them and dominate their every cell, but they also want to be your cute little pet to fool around with. I get the impression that this person worships the hell out of you and thinks you’re the best in bed, no matter your degree of experience. That’s the thing, they would be happy with a virgin and a sexpert alike, as I said they hardly care! Because you charmed them and made your standpoint clear! Even if you have a hot VERSUS stone-cold demeanor and sex appeal, they feel inspired by that.

Your sexual energies complement each other well I feel. In their mind, you could top them so easily. They gladly submit to an orgy of pleasure. I think they trust you a lot, they just want to lose control and be chased. They won’t chase you! You’re too prideful and want to set this up on your own terms. This relationship is yours to create, they won’t interfere. They’re too starstruck and want to gather their resources first, only to find out you’re tremendous fun to be with and they had nothing to worry about.

You are the sun of their universe Pile 1, you seduced them so much. If only you would boss them around, they want it so badly. This scenario could be a total clash of titans since you are both a total smokeshow in your own ways.  They looked at you and wanted you to open up, leave the stiff old life behind and feel younger again. Since you’re so foxy to them, they treat you like the bombshell you are, with lots of reverence and respect. I’m even getting service sub vibes from your person, Pile 1, they’ll just do whatever you ask `em like you’re royalty, long as it’s consensual of course, but I don’t get any toxic fantasies from this pile, just very dom-sub centered ones.

{ 𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚘𝚝/𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚘 𝚖.𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 }

pile ii - ACE OF CUPS „i’m your lover in plain sight“

⌈ EIGHT OF SWORDS - KNIGHT OF WANDS - 6 OF COINS - PAGE OF CUPS

Whirlwind kind of romance right here, lots of ups and downs in their anxious mind. You left them feeling powerless to all the energy they perceive you to so blazingly have, Pile 2. They were thunderstruck by your presence, were frozen on the damn spot. Tied. Up. Which leads us to the card imagery, by the way. Bondage fantasies is a huge theme here. I’m just sayin’… That’s their sexual fantasy when they think of you. If you’d blindfold them, or try something like knife play, even (as the swords card indicates), that would get them going so much. Despite their freaky imagination, ironically they are the mellow one, while you are the fiery counterpart that doles it all out to them in their wet dreams.

As contradictory as it sounds, reciprocating and giving back is the dynamic here, though. For instance, if you bought stuff for them, they’d be so happy and fawn over you like wild. Since this is a rollercoaster ride, however… I can’t quite tell what exactly their constant feelings are for you, Pile 2, as they are just so changeable. From no sex drive to reckless abandon to self-control to begging to being a fool in love. What a journey they’ve been through because of you. You make them feel all of this, and they’re saying thank you.

One day they want to be controlled by you, the other, they want to unleash their passion without any help and do their own dance to impress you. They have an edge but they’re romantic, they’re hopeless and they’re hot shit, they’re fair and then such a tease giving you less than you deserve, full well knowing it will keep you hooked and coming for them like an avalanche.

They want you rushing to their home like it's the firefighters. Because well, well… they’re feeling way too hot, aren’t they. At the same time, that’s the puzzling thing, they also want you to keep them at an arm’s length. If you aren’t confused about this person yet, at this point, you gotta be: Which mirrors them, in fact. They don’t quite know what they want consistently, you left them too dumbfounded to understand the situation for sure. Pile 2, this individual is head over heels for you.

Now this starstruck person dreams about being acted upon by you and they love that. Pillow prince/ss is what I’m seeing all over the spread, they have that receptive energy for the most part. They might be a little unruly once they get out of their comfort zone or don’t feel like they’re acknowledged by you (they might as well have a come-save-me fantasy… do them a favor and help them out). But when they do get signals, they are back in love romantically, yes, not so much sexually, they’re touchy-feely like crazy. Just when they felt like roaming free before! If there’s some hunter-prey fantasy going on here I wouldn’t be surprised, they want to keep you on your toes.

As I said, you get the best of both worlds Pile 2, your person is not the predictable type. Maybe that’s why you like `em. They are flirts and then they’re not. They want rough sex and then they want affection little by little. But the final note in their mind is always this: They want you to glued to them, to go wild for them, to witness them like a fish in the water: Through requited love. All they want is to be asked out and live their dreamy, sensitive love. Confusing you is not their intention. Don’t forget they just want love at the end of the day.

{ 𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚘𝚝/𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚘 𝚖.𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 }

pile iii - JUSTICE „i’m the one you deserve“

⌈ KNIGHT OF COINS - PAGE OF SWORDS - THE SUN - THE EMPRESS

What started out as a sensual, stable connection which didn’t go down in flames of horniness now turned their head into a mush. Which then turned into them bursting with vitality! An online message of yours shook them up, or something you said. But in a positive way, because they’re so happy now. Romantic, personal, sexual bliss, they’re feeling so good about themselves because of you, the dull days are over. What a mood boost you gave them, and they’re confident in their looks because of your steady presence/communication, oh my word.

Because you started out easygoing and then picked up speed, they are absolutely feeling themselves like it’s nobody’s business. I’m so happy for you, Pile 3, because your person is just prancing around like a child after you’ve been frank with them. Talking it out was so needed. Approaching it from a headspace was. Being chatty with them made your person super hot and bothered, too. Hell, they are totally into your voice, the way you take your time when you walk, the way you carry yourself, how you dress up, the way your hair is tousled (if you wear it longer), how you treat yourself, how you choose your words, and how you smile especially.

At first, they were so scared how serious and single-minded you came across. Now they’re blushing and sweating their ass off because you said what you said and you paid attention to them! When they thought they were the knight in shining armor, you gave them a reality check and dodged the bullet, stood your ground instead of playing helpless — which worked in their favor not to get their hopes up and invest right away. That’s how you made this person’s libido explode. But in a good, wholesome way.

This proper mix of humor and the crazy slow burn (!) between the two of you has them going nuts without actually making them crazy, you know? Just healthy adoration and warmth they feel. I get the impression your person has lots of sexual stamina, Pile 3. They know what they’re doing, y’all… they might come across as a total sunshine, but they are, oh my word. Fertile as hell, go all the way, ready to make those babies and live the good life. In this economy? Your person thinks so, who am I to judge, they want that settling down and parenthood. They just know you’d be good at raising kids. But without compromising the mental stimulation, which you give them consistently.

And because you’re such a hottie with charm and good looks, they’re at your feet. You rule them! Your sex appeal has their pretty head spinning, their routine is broken, they can’t get enough of you, they want this in-depth (literally!). For long, they fantasized about having carefree sex with you out in nature, wild and free. Never too much of a good thing with you. You’re so juicy to them, graceful, steamy, gorgeous, you seem to have it all in their eyes. 

They think you have elevated status or just carry yourself in a way that shows your life is fulfilled and abundant. Oh hell, what don’t they like about you. Maybe you can be too direct and frank at times? They prefer your magnanimous, silly, soft, giving, cute’n’comfy side. They need to be taken care of a little, or need your cheer-ups. Because they want to take it easy, and not have conflict and difficulty in communication. Healthy, loving, and lasting (!) sexuality is the gist of this, I’m thinking. Quite Venusian of them, I see their sexual thoughts as Libra/7th house or Taurus/2nd house-themed. An all-around feel-good reading, Pile 3, I love the positive cards you got.

{ 𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚘𝚝/𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚘 𝚖.𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 }

FINAL NOTE. meet me in the reply section if you want, and if you got stuff i can improve about my PAC posts, drop a comment as well, i want to brush up my format again!

⭐️ DISCLAIMER // there is no guarantee for accuracy. believing in the cards is a choice. 

© 2017-2023 sugar-petals. All readings for entertainment purposes only: They do not substitute any professional advice. Take what resonates, discard the piles that don’t hit home. If you aren’t drawn to any pile that’s okay, these messages aren’t for you. Do not repost my readings.

[cleolinda]

I am so fucking pissed. We’re hearing forecasts that we might get FIVE FUCKING INCHES OF SNOW overnight from Monday to Tuesday. In ALABAMA, where we have no snow removal equipment. Like I think we got one bag of sand for the whole town. No snow tires, I don’t even know what those are. This isn’t cute “Haha it’s just barely below freezing! Snowball fight!!!” snow. This is 14° Fuck (-11° Come the Fuck On) snow. FIVE INCHES? We get flurries and the city descends into madness.

What if we lose POWER. Everything runs off USB cord stuck in the outlet charging nowadays. This is why everyone used to run out and buy Milk Bread Batteries. Listen. I have this memory of the power going out during this wild snowstorm when I was a kid--I want to say it was Winter Storm '93. Ask anyone who lived in Alabama at the time. Like we had Desert Storm '92 the military operation one year and Winter Storm '93 the next. It was that serious in our minds, and I'm not sure you can blame us:

The storm dumped several inches of snow each hour on Birmingham, which ended up with officially 13 inches of snow.

Due to the high winds some parts of Birmingham reported drifts 5 to 6 feet deep. One state trooper reported that the roads were in the worst shape he had ever seen. "People can't tell what's road and what's not."

Low temperatures during the storm were in the 5-to-10 degree range on that Sunday.

IN A TOWN WHERE WE DON'T KNOW WHAT A SNOW PLOW IS. I think we had one for the entire county. Like I'm only kind of joking here.

And our power went out.

The snow was so heavy that it pulled down power lines either by its own weight, or by the tree branches its weight broke off. Meanwhile, the power at my house already went off every time a squirrel sneezed. I don't how many days this lasted; it was probably like, 2-3 days, but in my head, I was 14 years old boxed up with my family with no heat and it lasted two weeks. Maybe three years. The four of us slept in sleeping bags layered with quilts, huddled on the floor around a wood burning fire. (In the haunted house, no less.) The carpet was really nice, at least. We had a--do people still call them boomboxes? A big portable cassette player--battery-powered--with AM/FM radio. We listened to whatever TV shows were broadcast from the ABC station at night. We did have hot water; I took a lot of hot baths. We cooked food over the outdoor grill (which we moved to the comfortably large area under the deck, to hold off the falling snow), sometimes using aluminum foil as a kind of thin impromptu frying pan, and kept perishables like milk and meat in a cooler. Oh, did we have a bag of ice for the cooler? No, we used snow. God knows there was enough of it. Of course, I'm sure the refrigerator was perfectly serviceable even without power, because it was TEN DEGREES FUCK ALL.

I remember going outside a good bit and playing, as much as a teenager plays, in the snow with my seven-year-old sister. I remember that all the neighborhood kids got big rubber trashcan lids and used them as toboggans, going up to the top of the hill on our street and pretty successfully sledding down. Maybe it was "lmao snowball fight!!" snow when I was 14. I'm 45 now, and the cold makes me hurt. It makes me hurt all over. Maybe Winter Storm '24 will be a fun core memory for my nephew. I am pissed. And also charging all my electronics.

(ETA: It’s ‘24 now, isn’t it. My brain hasn’t clicked the date over yet. What is time.)

[smallidarityfan]

Hello! I know this is a Smallidarity blog. But I wanted to ask, what's your opinion on Boat Boys? And don't take this the wrong way, I love both Smallidarity and Boat Boys!

Hi!!! It's okay to ask non-smallidarity things hehe :3

text wall below (i like yapping):

I like Boat Boys !!! Honestly only just after Joel got onto Hermitcraft I'd say. I watched Joel's Double Life when it was uploading and honestly like. their dynamic didn't feel any more special than two guys playing minecraft and having fun on a casual/content creator level so it didn't really stand out to me at that point.

But Limited Life had like 2 banger Boat Boys one-liners from Etho i guess, and then the Decked Out Stream with the neck kisses bit which was pretty funny, and then Hermitcraft when they really went with the obsessed bit LMAO 😭😭

by HC tho I think they two finally had their dynamic sort of established ? Like we'd finally know how they'd act in casual circumstances or just when playing normal minecraft. Which I do like seeing at the times it happens!!

I think what really made me see their game is especially especially all the fan arts and those animations by Mellozheist really assured me of their dynamic and aesthetic as a duo, which I do love seeing on my tl often!!

Though in Joel's streams, chat would ask his opinion on Etho often and Joel would either make an obsession joke or comment how completely mysterious Etho is. Which tells me on the down-side that they're still at the stage of average friends and colleagues rather than close friends, so canon-wise they aren't my favourite duo compared to other pairings. (i am a sucker for dynamics of people who are close friends)

Also, pet peeve i have, but sometimes I do feel like their interactions feel a liiittle bit forced with chat pushing them to talk about their 'obsessions' with each other all the time. Which i feel like. yk it's been more than 6 months since the bit started. like even I am over smallidarity's "Is this the closest we're ever going to get to making out?" and don't base their entire dynamic on that one instance of them making out in Real Life smp. Yk ?!

(which i guess these kinda things are an unavoidable part of content creation where fans hold on to early introduced bits as long as there are new people flooding in) (so I won't generalize that much onto the duo themselves) (also i HATE FUN!!! /j)

All in all, canon-wise, not my favourite pair. But pretty high standings in terms of aesthetic and fanon interpretations !

Final score: 7.6/10 🆒‼️

(You can really tell that I like to stick close to canon dynamics rather than fanon concepts so er 😭 might be a tad bit biased) (i also loveeee best friends tropes if uh. that wasn't clear with my whole account. LMAO)

[neverhangd]

doing bits and bobs on the blog, obviously. rn i'm in potc hell (thank the gang lmao, s/o for dealing with me go to: @mvrtogg, @itismissswann, @norringtxn / @collectorofmuses), and i just realized that the majority of people who follow me may not have read this page (or even known it existed!), so i wanted to give two important bits of context!

1.) anne bonny walked so her archetypes could run.

i literally found out two weeks ago that anne bonny isn't stupid famous. whaaaaaat? but actually, that did shock me. maybe it's because i had two pirates phases and like research, but i've known a little bit about her since i was a kid: specifically, that she was a kick-ass pirate woman. i've learned a lot more since then, and i love to share it; i joined a group that i thought had a pirate phase only to learn that...they hadn't. and had no idea who anne bonny was outside of being a character someone before me had written as well.

it was exactly then that i realized anne bonny isn't a super famous kick-ass pirate woman and i felt like that one part of dogma. someone was trying to explain how my take on anne bonny both was and wasn't in-line with the previous writer's and it took me a while to realize they were asking what show or book i used for canon because they doubted she was the same character, despite sharing the archetypes. so. just so it's out there, here's an incomplete list of archetypes we can apply to the historical figure anne bonny, kick-ass pirate woman:

riches to rags (gave up a privileged life to marry a pirate)

the redhaired irish

girlboss/tits out for piracy (she would famously whip her shirt off in battle so men would know they'd been killed by a woman)

did it for love (left her first husband and became a pirate with her second)

it's a love story (whatever else they were, history tells us jack and anne were in love, even if i don't usually use that on this blog)

three's company, too (anne and read were absolutely an item at the same time as anne and jack)

ambiguously queer (i advocate for a bisexual anne, but the only lady-type lover she took was read, who can be fairly read as transmasc, putting some doubt on the full connotation of her orientation/s)

short fuse (she was known to fight over basically anything)

2.) what in the url?

since anne bonny isn't the kickass pirate bicon of my dreams--we'll get her there, one day!--it's relevant to also share what the fuck my url actually means. because she was a woman a pirate a woman and a pirate alive during the early 18th century, we actually don't have much record of anne speaking for herself. the most popularly known quote we have was spoken directly to jack rackham just before his execution:

if [you] had fought like a man, [you] need not have been hang'd like a dog. -A General History of Pyrates, Daniel Defoe

she said this to him because he and his men were the reason the ship had been caught and they had been taken prisoner and she took that very personally, as well she should! (it turns out that both anne and read were pregnant, anne by jack and read by their husband.) the larger thing is, she wasn't wrong: when the ship was invaded, only three people stood on the deck fighting: read, anne, and an unnamed pirate who presumably died in the struggle. everyone else was hiding below decks. read, in fact, famously fired TWICE down at the hiding men, killing one and injuring another.

the really wild part of all this, though, is the ending of anne's story. we don't know it.

anne's execution was stayed on account of her pregnancy, as was read's. read would die in prison from a fever, and presumably their child did as well; anne, on the other hand, simply...disappeared.

...but what is become of her since, we cannot tell; only this we know, that she was not executed. -A General History of Pyrates, Daniel Defoe (which, if you keep wondering why i'm referencing it, is considered THE source)

officially speaking, we may literally NEVER know what happened to anne. all we know is she NEVERHANGD.*

thank you for your time and attention! ♡

[shipshinablog]

hello can we learn more about Duncan he's real neat

Hello! Thank you for asking, I'll be happy to tell you!

1. Duncan is a former Marine who faked his death to escape the danger that threatened him. "Duncan" is his new name. He does not voice his past, his dead (literally) name and personal information from the past to anyone. Information you can get from him: He is about thirty, his height is 259.

2. He is the owner of the black mold devil fruit (kuro kabi no mi). he has many ways to use it, but basically he uses it for little pranks (getting into closed spaces, getting anywhere on the ship seamlessly... and maybe just a little to scare others)

3. Duncan is quite polite and has some manners (sometimes he uses this in a humorous way), he also likes to give people simple nicknames.

4. this is a list of facts: he loves animals! but they are afraid of him and, frankly, it upsets him, but he’s used to it. Duncan still tries to pick them up lmao. He is afraid of thunderstorms and loves sweets, he does not like strong winds. Afraid of places that are too open and loves small, hard-to-reach places. He can sit for a long time in the strangest little corner and look at you from the darkness. his body is cool due to the fact that he is below deck. and Well, he cooks well! Therefore, his position on the ship is cook.

5. Duncan was raised by his foster mother and he loves her very much. Due to...well, “his death,” he can’t see her anymore.

That's all I could remember, but I think something else might appear in the future lmao. If you are interested in anything about him, ask! I'll be happy to tell 😌

[harmonictechnicality]

HARMONY! HARMONY!!!! I ran out of tags trying to describe how much I loved this last update to Memory Logs I am having an out of body experience rn I didn’t even get to describe my favorite part!! THE WAY!!! YOU DESCRIBE THE FEELING OF BRAND NEW FINALLY REALIZED AND REQUITED LOVE!!!!! AAAAAAA literally how do you see and write on the human experience so clearly, you are some kind of wizard, *you’ve got mail voice* ms. 152 insights into my soul… “you thought I was mocking you??” vs actually teasing him about the !!!below deck!!! club (which lmao the existence of) but Steve just being so hyped that Eddie’s into him that it all comes out in this wash of bubbly feelings (“dear god stop this madness”), and “wants to stock up on chapstick and water so they can make out all night” OK SO I SWOONED, SHOW ME SOMEONE WHO WOULDNT, Steve giVeS EDdIE hiS RIIINNNNGGGG, “IT WOULD BE A PLEASURE TO RESTART WITH YOU”, the FOREHEAD KISS!!!! I don’t know how you do this, but if I ever lost my memory, rereading all of your fics again for the first time would be such a pleasure. Rereading them after a week is a pleasure. Rereading them right after finishing reading to note down every favorite line is a pleasure!! You get my drift haha… anyway thank you for being such a queen and sharing your incredible writing with us for free. I am wishing you many dark chocolate pudding cups, and much fan art to delight you, and a very generous rest for your wrists on the other side of all this typing, and a very marvelous week 💕💕

OMG your tags were giving my LIFEEE how rude that they would ever cut you off like that! I need to speak to the internet manager asap!! 😂😂

HAHA the wizard line is *extra* perfect because Steve would *also* blame such sorcery on a wizard (he definitely called Vecna a wizard that is obsessed with clocks and I will never let that go lol).

There hassss to be unreleased footage in the ST vault of all the divorced moms and Eddie just waiting for Steve to turn around and scoop in the back ice cream counters, like PLEASE tell me the footage exists and I didn't just make it up 😭

AGH the ring and forehead kiss goodbye are maybe my favorite parts ❣️❣️ like Steve knows there's nothing else he can do but give a little piece of himself and then hope that there's magic-memory powers in his expert kissing abilities - it's very naive and endearing and heartbreaking all at once and I just want to give him the biggest hug for trying so hard.

Sweet deerling, that is SO incredibly kind omgggg my tender heart cannot take such kindness!! If someone ever made fan art for this I would *weep,* even if they just thought about it, I'd still be teary! I don't have dark chocolate pudding but I dooooo have dark chocolate raisins, which is definitely a win. I'm sending you all the good vibes for the rest of the week/weekend ✨✨ Thank you so much for always being so supportive of the little stories I write.

Have a spectacular day!! Watch all the Meg Ryan films your heart desires!! ❤️🥰❤️

[cookinguptales]

I missed the flurry of readings because I've been hungover all day from my brother's wedding, haha! But I'd love a silly reading from a deck of your choice

It's all good! I hope you had fun!

My movie's having Technical Difficulties rn so it's a good time to take a break and do some more readings. lmao

I decided to go back to the Pulp Tarot for this, our second silly reading. All of those cards seem to be telling a gorgeous little story, so I thought it'd be fun for a silly reading.

(Ace of Wands, Temperance, Queen of Cups)

Once upon a time, there was a giant and a beanstalk, and y'all already know that story. This giant was not a bad guy, for all that he ate humans every now and then. Everyone eats, after all, and it's not a crime to be at the top of the food chain. Besides which, humans had a strange tendency to climb up beanstalks and steal from him.

Genuinely, what the fuck?

So after having, like, his goose stolen and his harp stolen and his bag of gold stolen, the giant was like. Dude! No! And he got himself a really big stick.

"FEE FI FO FUM,"

the giant said.

oh jesus christ,

not this again,

thought the townsfolk.

"IF YOU CLIMB THAT BEANSTALK AGAIN, YOU'LL GET FUCKING WRECKED."

And truthfully, that was actually kind of fair. But the villagers below had seen how rich and famous that Jack guy had become and they were actually kind of assholes, so they decided to enlist the help of A Hero to help them steal from that giant again.

The hero was temperance itself, part man and part woman, part land and part sea, something beautiful and winged and glistening with scales. And this hero, they thought that probably there could be a nonviolent solution to all this.

They flew up to where the giant lived and had a nice long talk over a cup of tea. The giant told the hero his point of view, and the hero had to admit that he had a point. It wasn't kind to eat your neighbors, perhaps, but it didn't help matters when they were fucking thieves.

"Hey," the hero said, flying down once again to the town. "Maybe you should just leave him alone."

"No," said the townsfolk. "That sounds really boring. We'd rather steal."

Then the townsfolk threw a rock at them.

"Right, then," said the hero. "Fuck this. I'm going home."

The hero's home was betwixt and between, up and down, somewhere not land and not sea but the mist between them both. That sounds an awful lot like a cloud, though, and so for now, the hero went to go hang out with the giant.

That night, the hero found out that golden eggs make pretty good omelets. Not only that, apparently the bones of Englishmen make pretty good bread.

The end.

--------------------

The moral of this reading is that British people steal too much. Also, Jack and the Beanstalk is a weird story.

Don't steal, and maybe practice temperance when you can. When you can't, I guess eating people is okay, too.

[sometimesanalice]

Jordannnn!

You know how much I love two idiots who are so into each other that it makes them more than a little lovestruck and oblivious, lmao! And these two are no exception 😂

(Also you’re so right, Bradley Bradshaw in a tux would be absolutely lethal!)

more for you!

i loved everyone’s guesses for her costume! it’s cute how they keep referring to her as her supposed costume name ☺️ i wanted to shake both of them though and be like YOU LIKE EACH OTHER IT ALREADY CAN BE MORE!! bradley’s proposed halloween costume would’ve been lethal though, some might even say it would be a license to kill 😉 more below because i have so much to say ⚫️⚪️⚫️⚪️

When he’d arrived Nat, decked out in a sequined pink gown with a gun he wasn’t sure was fake or not strapped to her thigh for her Miss Congeniality costume - this is the PERFECT costume for nat holy cow i’m obsessed— she would be the most iconic of Gracie Lous! And I just know she’d be waiting for the right moment to bust out the “IM GLIDING HERE” the second someone bumped into her, lol

“…and too heavy looking to have been bought off Amazon.” - OBSESSED with this little detail— he has a stash he travels with and I stand by that, no one can tell me that man doesn’t like an accessory

It was the first and last time he’d taken Fanboy’s advice and you teased him about it every opportunity you got. - bradley going to mickey for advice!?! oh i’m HOWLING with laughter. i know he got chirped so badly for that— desperate time all for desperate measures! although i full believe Mickey set him up with that one 😂 the man has been punked but at least it worked out for him

You, 10:34pm: If you want to come over. - her tacking it on at the end all nervous 🥺☺️ oh she likes him so much! trying to be cool and breezy for the man who is the definition of not cool and breezy haha— the way they’re both trying to out chill the other that they situationship zone themselves for months lololol.

He looks over the top of your head to see some guy lingering at the end of the aisle. “The guy who looks like off-brand John Mayer?” - bradley 🤭 funny boy— a triple threat! He’s pretty, he’s competent, he can roast someone’s shitty ex!

“Ok then, mister tempting-fate-with-salmonella, what’s your stance on the great vanilla bean vs French vanilla debate?” - he does live on the edge after all 😉 (i love this line)— he probably also has opinions on the cookie dough to ice cream ratio

“Nah, just watching my figure. The containers are smaller and I have a sweet tooth.” - BUBBA NO 🥺🥺 oh my sweet boy you’re perfect! i agree with the reader, he already looks so pretty— good news is that with her there’s always ice cream in the freezer now 🥰🥰🥰

“Oh, ok. That’s, um, that’s good.” You sound almost… disappointed? You take a step towards the case and he drops his arm back down to his side, already missing the feel of you under it. - 🥺 they’re both so bummed the charade is over!!! personally i’d be hiding my disappointment too girl ✊🏻 (also i love her rationale for suggesting rocky road)— the way she was having so much fun with him! And the it was like ⚡️ back to reality. as for the ice cream choice, we know how much Bradley likes a smart girl!!

“And you’re so much hotter than him, so I really lucked out there with you as my knight in ironed  khakis,” you say unabashedly, reaching out to straighten out his already perfectly straight name tag. - i’m GIGGLING 🤭 THE NAME TAG 🤭 this is so intimate for some reason!?!!— miss ma’am saw her opportunity to touch him at least one more time and went for it!

Your hands tightly fisted in his hair and your breathy whines in his ear urging him to fuck you harder and faster until you come with his name in your mouth. - goddddddddd it’s not FAIR!!! why can’t i have a cheeky grocery store run in!!? (but also i’m dying to know why it never got past just sex?)— about to set up a shine in the grocery aisle to manifest a meetcute like this one, lol. Miss ma’am worked FAST 😂 (they like each other almost too much, they’d get so distracted by how into each other they were and the physical chemistry that when he’d come over they had a hard time keeping their hands off each other. Not realizing that the pillow talk and DoorDash in bed was basically a naked version of dating, lol. And then they got nervous about scaring the other off after the first few times that they kind of fell into a pattern)

That night was the most real it’s ever felt. And he wanted more nights just like that. - THEN WHY ISNT IT REAL BRADLEY— Mr man is worried about blowing it and misreading all the signals!

And then in the morning he’ll press a kiss to your cheek and take one more look back at you before leaving through the same door he’d shown up at only hours before. - THEN WHY ARENT YOU STAYING BRADLEY— he has to go to work, Jordan! (He started keeping his spare uniform in his car because he tends to get to base late the nights he sleeps over 🤭) That plane isn’t going to fly itself! Lmao

“Aren’t you too old to be in a situationship, Bradshaw?” Jake asks, interrupting his thoughts. - fuck off blondie, let him process it on his own!- 😂😂😂

He doesn’t know why he’s so nervous all of a sudden, he’s never had an issue asking girls out before. - THEN WHY DIDNT YOU ASK HER OUT BRADLEY— you’re cracking me up with these lmaoooo but also REALLY BRADLEY GET IT TOGETHER

Rooster holds his breath when they start and stop a few times, each time they disappear and come back again his heart pounds a little harder in his chest. - i just know she was so nervous!!!!— THE PANIC! she’s like what do i wear what does this mean is this still casual fuck if I’m going to lock that man down (hopefully)

He can’t even begin to guess what you’re dressed as because other than the night he met you, it’s the most clothes he’s ever seen you in. - first i love her blouse, it’s something i’d absolutely wear too so double points for that, but this??? ‘it’s the most clothes he’s ever seen you in’ is unreal! like something about that made me so sad, they both want so much more. (i can picture her making sure her outfit is all righted and her hair and makeup are all touched up before she heads out to see him, especially if like bradley said, he doesn’t see her properly dressed up often? it’s it’s veering into something else with this)— i fully believe she’s a comfy clothes as soon as she gets home type of girliepop. Also she knows that the less she wears the less time it’ll take for him to get her out of them 🤭 but she was DEFINITELY undoing a button or two in the car before getting out and making her first official Hard Deck entrance!

“That’s for me to know, and for you to spend the night guessing,” you smirk, the curve of your mouth promising mischief. “But I think you’ll like it once you figure it out.” - it’s funny because i know 🤭— you knew like 30 seconds after I did, lmao. Because that’s how it works in this house 😂

He steps in close, winding an arm around your low back pulling you in close. “James Bond,” he says, enjoying the way your eyes light up. - H O T T O G O 🤭🤭— Lucky girl gets to see it later 💃🏼

“Your future girlfriend, I thought it was pretty obvious.” - cheeky cheeky girl i LOVEEEEEE it so much, it’s also something i just know bradley would do too so that’s how you know they’re perfect for each other— so cheeky! so confident!! and that’s totally a line he’d pull, you’re so right. also he like a girl who knows what she wants and goes after it!

You put a finger up and twist a little in his arms to rummage in your purse. And when you turn back towards him you’ve got a bright red clown nose on your face. - this funny but also a little sad if you think about it like if he didn’t like it or said no? 🥺 (jordan this is not an angsty fic you goon!)— chances are she’d have put it on his face if he’d have turned her down. good thing Bradley knows better than to fumble the girl of his dreams!

Are You Gonna Be My Girl?

Summary: It’s been a couple of months since the two of you have started hooking up, and it’s no secret that Rooster is hung up on you. He takes the gamble and invites you to the yearly Halloween bash at the Hard Deck. The only problem is he can’t figure out what the hell you’re supposed to be. 

Pairing: Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw x Female Reader

Length: 6.2K

Warnings: allusions to smut and Rooster being a simp (but what else is new 😂) (mdni)

The Black Keys’ “Howlin’ for You” playing loudly over the static-y speakers of the Hard Deck masking the sound of Rooster’s fingers as he impatiently drums them on top of the worn table, uncaring of the fact he’s out of tempo with the song.

Penny’s yearly Halloween Spooktacular has always been a fan favorite with those stationed at North Island. A name that Amelia had thrown shade at no less than five times as she worked on designing the event flier the afternoon that the Daggers had been bribed with free beers for coming in on their free time to help decorate.

There wasn’t an inch of the bar that was left untouched, and it wasn’t just that Bob had gotten carried away with the downy spider webbing. There were orange and purple string lights threaded around the circular mug racks, floating candles over the pool table, dangling bats and streamers, and an enthusiastic but poorly executed attempt at a balloon arch over the entry door.

The wispy fog covered punchbowl with a suspicious dark purple beverage bubbled away on the bartop, tendrils cascaded over the side only adding to the atmosphere. The stuff was so potent that Bradley was pretty sure it would put the jungle juice he’d thrown back in college to shame.

Rooster had been tasked with curating the playlist for tonight’s party, and if he’d been paying even a little bit of attention, he’d have known his choices were being well received by the boisterous crowd. But his attention is half split trying to listen to Hangman’s story about the Halloween prank gone wrong that left him with twelve stitches and half listening for-

Ding

He’s quick on the draw to pull out his phone from the chest pocket to check if it was his that went off.

When he’d arrived Nat, decked out in a sequined pink gown with a gun he wasn’t sure was fake or not strapped to her thigh for her Miss Congeniality costume, had given him a look of disdain and said what he was wearing was low effort even for him.

Rooster tucks his phone away with a disappointed sigh when there are zero new notifications on his lock screen.

“Don’t think I’ve ever seen you so whipped over a girl before, Bradshaw,” Hangman drawls, leaning into the gunslinging cowboy thing he has going on for the evening. His shirt is unbuttoned more than is strictly necessary, and is complete with a belt buckle that is larger than the state of Texas and too heavy looking to have been bought off Amazon.

Ding

Bradley fishes out his phone again from the pocket he’d put it back in only moments earlier.

You, 10:32pm: “u up?”

He grins.

“And we’ve lost him,” someone snarks, but he’s too busy punching in the password to unlock his phone to care.

Bradley Bradshaw, 10:32pm: are you ever going to let that go?

You, 10:32pm: Mmm, no. You were so bad at being a fuckboy, it was funny.

You, 10:33pm: But in a very hot way, might I add. And clearly, it worked in your favor since I let you come over and hit it a second time.

Rooster snorts in amusement.

It was the first and last time he’d taken Fanboy’s advice and you teased him about it every opportunity you got. He had been a little rusty with the ins and outs of no-strings-attached sex with someone who wasn’t in the Navy. But he’d more than made up for it that same night by eating you out until your legs were shaking and you were weakly pushing his head away as he’d coaxed you into coming just one more time against his tongue.

Bradley Bradshaw, 10:33pm: don’t remember hearing you laughing last night when your pussy was dripping all over my cock

He takes a sip of beer as he waits for your response.

You, 10:33pm: Look! You’re already so much better at sexting than you were when we met!

You, 10:34pm: “u up?” is still on the table, by the way. Not to brag, but I even have a pumpkin shaped pizza. 

You, 10:34pm: If you want to come over. 

If you want to come over. He shakes his head reading the text again.

As if he’d ever pass up on getting to spend time with you.

As if Rooster hadn’t been hooked on you since the moment he’d met you.

𝗧𝗪𝗢 𝗠𝗢𝗡𝗧𝗛𝗦 𝗔𝗚𝗢

As a general rule, Bradley hated grocery shopping.

He’s never had the patience for it, with the way that everyone is in their own world. He gets tired of always having to weave around people and the way that there always seems to be carelessly parked carts or people catching up standing between him and the items on his list.

Which is why when he noticed the parking lot was mostly empty on his way home, he decided to stop and spare himself the headache of doing it over the weekend when everyone else was out and just get it done.

He’d expected to be in and out in record time until the uniform lines of colorful cartons of ice cream caught his attention as he was tossing in a few bags of frozen chicken into his cart. Normally it was always so crowded that he never felt like he could take his time looking without being in someone’s way, that he’d skip it entirely and later try to convince himself that his Greek yogurt was just as good. But tonight since no one was around, he was taking his time.

Under the glare of the fluorescents, he stands there with the hum of the freezers competing with the too-twangy-for-his-taste country song playing over the speakers and debating his options when he feels an arm thread around his own, surprising him out of the pros and cons list he was making in his head between the healthier low-calorie choice versus the one he actually wanted.

“Hi, hello there.” Bradley glances over to see the prettiest pair of eyes looking up at him expectantly. “Do you mind playing along for a few minutes, there’s some creep who keeps trying to bother me.”

He looks over the top of your head to see some guy lingering at the end of the aisle. “The guy who looks like off-brand John Mayer?”

You scrunch your nose up. “That’d be the one.”

“How good are you at picking out ice cream flavors?” he asks, standing up straighter and pulling his shoulders back.

You blink at him in confusion before your lips tick up in a relieved smile. “Very good, as a matter of fact.”

“Great, you came to my rescue just in time.” Bradley guides you closer until you’re in front of him, lightly resting a hand on your hip the way he would if you were his girlfriend. “Is this ok?” he asks under his breath, only loud enough for you to hear.

When you nod, he feels the knot in his chest loosen. Because while he wants this to be convincing to the guy still loitering at the edge of the aisle, he doesn’t want to make you uncomfortable.

“First things first, we need to establish a baseline.” You point at the carton covered in cartoony looking chocolate chip cookies. “What’s your opinion on cookie dough?”

“Overrated,” he answers, not missing a beat. “I’d rather just eat the stuff out of a tube instead.”

You lean back into him a bit more. “Ooh, tough crowd,” you tease, your head finding his shoulder. “Ok then, mister tempting-fate-with-salmonella, what’s your stance on the great vanilla bean vs French vanilla debate?”

Bradley takes a quick look around to make sure they’re not blocking any other late night grocery shoppers. He pretends to ponder for a moment before responding, “I like the one with flecks.”

“A dignified choice.” You say it so solemnly that he can’t help but chuckle.

The easy back and forth banter goes on for a few more minutes. Sometimes you rib him about his answers and other times agree. It shouldn’t be so fun standing there in front of the cooler filled with tubs of ice cream, but it is. It was the last thing he could have expected when he’d decided to stop in at the last minute on his way home after hitting up the Hard Deck.

When he tells you the two choices he had been contemplating before you’d come up to him, you hum contemplatively and tap a finger against your cheek, “Well this changes everything if you’re dairy free.”

“Nah, just watching my figure. The containers are smaller and I have a sweet tooth.”

“Respectfully, I don’t think that’s something you need to worry about. You fill out those khakis just fine, if you don’t mind me saying.”

“I don’t mind at all.” Rooster wonders if you can hear his self-satisfied grin. “Not every day I get a pretty girl telling me she was checking out my ass.”

You let out a small, amused scoff and all he feels is pleased with himself.

“I was not checking out your- oh.” The surprise in your voice has him leaning back enough to get a look at your face. “Wait, is he gone?” You peer around his shoulder, but don’t make a move to pull away from the gentle hold he has on you.

“He left around the time you were giving a very impassioned speech about how overlooked spumoni is. I probably should have mentioned it sooner, but you were making a pretty compelling case and I didn’t want to interrupt,” he says, trying to play it off casually and hoping that he didn’t just become the creep in this story when you tell it to your friends later.

“Oh, ok. That’s, um, that’s good.” You sound almost… disappointed? You take a step towards the case and he drops his arm back down to his side, already missing the feel of you under it. “Thank you so much for committing to the bit. Seriously, I truly appreciate it,” you say over your shoulder, opening the glass door.

He rubs the back of his neck, watching as you grab a carton out of the freezer, not sure whether to move on with the rest of his shopping or not. But when you turn back towards him, he’s hit with the full force of your smile, feeling it all the way to his toes.

“Rocky Road,” you say, setting the carton into his cart. “It has peanuts in it, which is a nutrient-dense food and an excellent plant-based source of protein. There’s collagen from the gelatin in the marshmallows. And chocolate has antioxidants in it and is known to trigger the holy trinity of happy brain chemicals. It’s basically a superfood.”

Rooster grins. “I don’t think it works like that.”

“No, unfortunately, it really doesn’t,” you agree, playfully leaning a hip against his cart. “But it’s more fun this way, don’t you think?”

He’s so fucking charmed by you and he doesn’t even know your name yet.

While he’s glad he was there at the right time and got to play a small part in deterring that guy from continuing to hassle you, he kind of wishes the two of you could have met under different circumstances, because he’d jump at the chance of being able to score a date with you. He sighs and shakes the thought out of his head.

“Would you like me to walk you to your car?” Rooster offers, ready to abandon his groceries for a few extra minutes with you.

“Oh wow.” That mischievous gleam that had been in your eyes changes to something softer. You tilt your head, taking him in with a thoughtful expression on your face. “You’re one of those rare genuinely a gentleman types, aren’t you? Like the kind who always walks closest to the curb and mows their elderly neighbor’s yard without being asked.” Bradley just lifts a shoulder. He’s used to looking out for other people, it’s just something he’s always done. “And they say chivalry is dead,” you muse, contemplatively, “I should let you know though, knock-off John Mayer is my ex.”

He feels his hackles rise up immediately and scans the area again to double check the guy isn’t still hanging around. “Is he harassing you?”

“Oh no, it was only an unfortunate fluke, I promise,” you say, patting his hand that’s gripping the handle of the shopping cart reassuringly. “He’s just a jackass who thought he could cheat on me and that I’d still take him back.” Bradley grunts at that, even more irritated than he was before. “But he was still trying to test the waters, even after I told him I was seeing someone,” you continue, with a roll of your eyes, “Which was technically true- even if I am in fact single right now- because that’s when I saw you over here gazing very intensely into the freezer case like you’d been personally victimized by Ben and Jerry.”

“You’re out of his league anyways,” he rasps. 

There’s no way in hell Bradley would fumble a girl like you.

You grin widely, clearly amused at his annoyance on your behalf. “He was a tool with an overinflated ego and a flat ass.” Rooster barks out a surprised laugh. “And you’re so much hotter than him, so I really lucked out there with you as my knight in ironed  khakis,” you say unabashedly, reaching out to straighten out his already perfectly straight name tag. “You really went above and beyond for your country there helping me win the break up.”

“I don’t think you needed me for that part. It’s pretty clear you came out on top.” His eyes dart down to your hand on the cart, like you forgot it was still resting on top of his. “But I was more than happy to help all the same.” He takes a half step closer into your space, deciding just to go for it. “I’m thinking we should keep up the ruse though, you know, just in case he is lurking by the pasta or something.”

You quirk a knowing eyebrow at him. “Is that so?”

“I could also use your professional opinion on cereal. That is if you still have some more shopping to do,” he suggests, nodding to your mostly empty handbasket.

There’s no question that he’s caught your interest, not with the way you’re looking at him. That smile you’re wearing tells a story of its own. “What a coincidence, that just happens to be my forte.”

“I had a feeling you might be the right girl for the job.” Bradley takes your basket from you and sets it in his cart and gestures for you to lead the way.

He learns your name around the same time he does about your hottake on Frosted Cheerios.

And later that night, his groceries are packed away in your fridge as the container of Rocky Road the two of you were sharing melts on your coffee table- the condensation puddling on the marble surface reflecting the credits rolling across the TV screen- as you ride him on your couch. Your hands tightly fisted in his hair and your breathy whines in his ear urging him to fuck you harder and faster until you come with his name in your mouth.

And in the morning, he gets your number over a bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

The two of you have been fooling around for a couple of months now.

On the nights Rooster wasn’t fucking you, he was getting himself off to the thought of you and wishing you were in bed with him. You’ve never been to his place, so he doesn’t even have the bonus of that bright citrus scent of you lingering on his sheets on the nights he spends alone.

The sex was great. Mind-blowing. You were loud and enthusiastic and gave just as good as you got. Bradley found your confidence sexy as hell. You were the type of girl who knew exactly what she wanted and he was always up for the challenge of finding new ways to make your back arch and toes curl.

But he was just as much of a fan of the parts that came before and after getting you spasming around his cock.

He liked the way your mind worked. You were always telling him about something interesting you’d read, because you were naturally curious about the world around you. You asked him thoughtful questions about his job and his life in the Navy, but not in the way he was used to from the tag chasers that frequented the Hard Deck. There was no mistaking you were asking because you wanted to know more about him, and not fixated on the shiny sheen of his golden aviator wings.

Rooster has never laughed as much as he has with you. In those moments between catching your sighs with his mouth and waiting for the knock on the door for whatever late-night craving was being delivered, you’d have him laughing and grinning until his cheeks ached.

The closest he’s ever gotten to taking you on a proper date was that one late night drive-thru run when everything on delivery apps were closed. You’d looked like his favorite daydream sitting there under the glow of the streetlamp in the nearly empty parking lot in a shirt of his that he must have accidently left behind after a hook up.

That night was the most real it’s ever felt. And he wanted more nights just like that.

He liked the way you always seemed to have a documentary to recommend for any given topic, he has a list on his phone and has been working his way through them. He liked the way the glasses you wore sometimes seemed slightly too big for your face because it was cute the way you’d constantly push them back up your nose. He liked that you texted in full sentences with complete and proper punctuation.

Bradley could already imagine how tonight would most likely go.

He’d dip out of the party early and come to your place. Your tongue in his mouth and your greedy little hand tugging to get his belt undone before he’d even made it through the door. The two of you going at it until someone has to tap out- which he is smug in the fact that more often than not it’s usually you- now that he knows all the best ways to pull orgasm after orgasm out of you. Sometimes the two of you order in, and other nights you’ll pass a bowl of ice cream or cereal back and forth over the island in your kitchen where he gets to hear you laugh and tease him and tell him about your day. Then do it all over again and once you’re thoroughly spent, he’ll hold you as you fall asleep. And then in the morning he’ll press a kiss to your cheek and take one more look back at you before leaving through the same door he’d shown up at only hours before.

And that was fine for now, but he wanted more of you. He didn’t want to be just a casual hook up, he wanted to date you.

He wanted to be soft launched and hard launched, or whatever it was that Mickey was talking about that night he’d taken his misguided advice and sent the much teased “u up?” text. He wanted to block people in the chip aisle of the grocery store as you talked him into getting some crazy flavor, turning his least favorite chore into the highlight of his week. He wanted knockoff John Mayer to see he got the girl and knew how to treat her right.

He wanted you to be his girl.

“Aren’t you too old to be in a situationship, Bradshaw?” Jake asks, interrupting his thoughts.

“Fuck off,” Rooster grumbles, his eyebrows furrowed and his thumbs still hovering over the screen. A couple minutes have ticked by since your last text as he sits there stewing. He knocks back the remainder of his beer, it’s mostly foam, “I think I’m gonna head out.”

“No, you’re not. Bob hasn’t even performed the dance routine to “Thriller” yet,” Nat says, pinning him to his stool with a look, “Come on, Bradley, just invite her here.” She reaches overs and squeezes his shoulder. “You’ve been seeing her for a couple months now. You’re clearly into her, and you wouldn’t disappear on us as much as you do if she wasn’t into you too. This is a low stakes environment with everything going on and people off having fun doing their own thing. And the two of you can still go and do whatever you’re going to do after.”

“I don’t know, Phoenix, she might dump him when she sees what he’s wearing at a Navy bar on Halloween,” Hangman drawls, unhelpfully, grinning around that damn toothpick.

“Shut it, Bagman,” they both say simultaneously.

“Just throw it out there and see what she says.” Nat slides out of her seat, the beads on her dress scraping against the edge of the stool. “Now, we’re going to let you panic in peace for a few minutes while we get another round.”

“We’re?” Jake asks slowly, deliberately drawing out the word.

“Yep,” she confirms, the look on her face leaving no room for arguments as she tugs him off his seat. “And you’re paying, let’s go.”

Bradley scrubs a hand over his face, but not before he sees Nat punching Seresin in the arm on their way to the bar.

He doesn’t know why he’s so nervous all of a sudden, he’s never had an issue asking girls out before. Not that he’s ever had to work that hard for it, but still.

His knee bounces on the foot rest as he works out what to say. He types out the message and gives it a quick once over and hits send before he can overthink it.

Bradley Bradshaw, 10:42pm: I’d never say no to you or a pumpkin shaped pizza. But I’m actually at a Halloween party right now at the bar near base with some friends. And I’m thinking you should stop by.

Bradley Bradshaw, 10:42pm: I’m sorry it’s a last minute invite, but it’s always a good time and I think you would have fun. I’d like to see you, if “ur up” for it.

He tries not to dwell on the fact he just double texted you, a thing he didn’t know he should be worried about before Fanboy warned him about doing it.

It’s like he’s been hit by lightning the way he shoots up in his seat when he sees those little dots appear on the screen. Rooster holds his breath when they start and stop a few times, each time they disappear and come back again his heart pounds a little harder in his chest.

You, 10:44pm: I’m all in. What’s the address?

All the bubbles from the beer he’d had earlier swarm and rush to his head at once as he drops you a pin.

Nat pushes a shot of bourbon towards him across the table when they return. “Did it go well?”

He nods. “She’s on her way.”

“Good, because you know Halloween is my favorite holiday and your sulking was bringing the vibe down.”

He chuckles, there’s no way he’s beating those whipped allegations now.

She clinks her own shot with his and they throw them back together, the warmth of the expensive tasting liquor sticks behind his sternum.

The next thirty minutes are the longest of Rooster’s life. His head swings to the front door every time it opens, hoping that it’ll be you outlined by the purple, green, and orange string lights.

When he sees you come through the swiftly deflating balloon arch scanning the bar for him, he almost does a double take.

You’ve got on a black and white polka dot top, the cuffs are a flared ruffle that are tied with a bow at your wrist. Your skirt is plain black, but the way it hugs your hips leaves little to the imagination. He can’t even begin to guess what you’re dressed as because other than the night he met you, it’s the most clothes he’s ever seen you in.

Excluding those little silky matching sets you’re usually wearing when he comes over. But those don’t usually stay on too long before they end up on the floor of your living room. Or bedroom. Or kitchen.

He usually has to leave before you, so he’s usually headed out your front door while you’re still wrapped up in one of those fluffy white towels you have. He’s enjoying seeing you here in his favorite bar in that outfit and heading towards him like you’re just as happy to see him as he is to see you.

“Huh, if I'm not mistaken I’m pretty sure that’s what I sent you into work in this morning,” you say, grinning up at him and lightly tugging on the zipper of his flight suit. “Are you supposed to be a Walk of Shame?”

Bradley wraps an arm around you because he can’t help himself. “Please, we all know it’s called the Stride of Pride. It’s never a shame when I get laid.” He presses his fingertips into the swell of the top of your ass before leaning in close, his lips brushing against your ear, “Plus, I didn’t have time to go home and grab my costume because someone lured me back into bed this morning.”

He had to do 200 extra push-ups and stay behind to do paperwork as penance for being late the third time that week, but it was worth it. But by the time he was finished, the sun was already well on its way to setting. If he’d been a bit more forward thinking he would have brought the costume he had planned with him, instead of thinking he’d have time to swing by his house to change. Bradley didn’t think it was too much of a let down for you, not with the way you’re looking at him. It’s that same heated way that tells him you’re remembering your reaction to it the first time you’d ever seen him in it.

“Sounds like poor planning on your part,” you tease, your finger tracing the edge of his nametag. “I can’t believe you’re wearing your work clothes to a Halloween party, Rooster.”

“Ok, funny girl. Tell me then, what’re you supposed to be?” He takes a step back and gives you a blatant once over, taking his time admiring the shape of you from your head to your toes in some wicked looking heels and back up again.

Maybe if things went well tonight, you’d leave them on for him later when he gets you alone.

“That’s for me to know, and for you to spend the night guessing,” you smirk, the curve of your mouth promising mischief. “But I think you’ll like it once you figure it out.”

“Bradshaw, are you going to introduce us to your sexy librarian?” Hangman hollers, waving the two of you over back to the table with his hat. Bradley doesn’t hear as much as he sees the oof that comes out of the blonde when Phoenix sends an elbow into his side.

Rooster glances at you with a raise of his eyebrow and you shake your head. Not a sexy librarian then.

“I take it you know the rodeo clown?”

He tips his head back and laughs, already looking forward to telling Hangman. “I do. And Gracie Lou Freebush over there too.”

You wave over at Nat, gesturing to her costume and mouth obsessed, before turning back to him to ask, “Is that gun real?”

“I’m too afraid to ask,” he jokes, only half kidding. “C’mon let me get you a drink, I have an in with the bartender.”

“Are you trying to show off for me, Bradley?”

“Definitely.” He reaches out and toys with the end of the bow on your sleeve. “Is it working, Leslie Knope?”

You just send him that devastating smile of yours and thread your fingers through his. “I think I'm going to have so much fun with this tonight.”

“But full disclosure, you see Napoleon Bonaparte?” He points over to where Mav is behind the bar wearing tasseled shoulder pads pouring pints behind the bar next to a bedazzled Penny in a white neoclassical style dress. “That’s my godfather and his fiancée.”

You school the surprise on your face quickly. “Bradley Bradshaw, are you a nepobaby?”

“That’s a story for another time.” He chuckles, carefully winding his way around a Fred Flintstone and a Deviled Egg to the bar. “Be warned though, the Blue Slime Sipper is lethal. I had four last year and put on an a cappella performance of the Ghostbusters theme song.”

“Please tell me someone has a video of that,” you laugh.

“I called in every favor I had to get all evidence of that particular performance erased.”

At the bar, you order two Blue Slime Sippers looking the picture of innocence as you admire the giant spider affixed to the top of the bar by the till, even though he knows better.

One for him and one for you.

He briefly introduces you to Penny and Mav, trying to keep it casual. Thankfully, it’s busy enough that there’s not more time for small talk or jokes about the frosted tips he had when he was thirteen.

Their guess at a modern day I Love Lucy was also met with a no.

But he’s pretty sure Mav’s attempt to stealthily shoot him two thumbs up after you get your neon blue colored drinks fails based on the way your lips are pressed together in an attempt to smother the smile that he sees toying at the corners of your mouth.

Over the course of the night, it becomes a game that the rest of the team joins in on as he introduces them to the girl he’s been hung up on for weeks.

You help him kick Payback and Fanboy’s asses at the Eyeball Beer Pong that Penny had set up outside on the deck.

“Damn, Lawyer Barbie has an arm,” Fanboy says, the spring of the Slingy Dog costume sagging sadly between him and Payback, watching as you sink another doodled on ping-pong ball into a cup.

“I think we need a rematch,” Payback countered after their loss, “Flight Attendants have great hand-eye coordination, it’s an unfair advantage.”

Both guesses were met with a no.

When you side with Nat over Death Becomes Her as the best, but most underrated, Halloween movie, she throws her hands up in victory, “Thank you! Finally, someone with good taste… Olivia Pope?”

It’s another no, but he’s happy to see how much fun you’re having with his friends.

Between the riotous costume contest voting, and the one-man performance of “Thriller” that Bob puts on, and the pumpkin tic-tac-toe, Rooster has a lot of fun making his own guesses.

Except for the time he offers up Miss Bliss, he nearly chokes on his Cauldron Cooler when you ask him, “Is that a porn thing?”

Which in hindsight, he probably should have specified from the show Saved by the Bell, that he only knew because he’d been into Tiffani Amber Thiessen as a kid, but he doesn’t get to because you’re too busy delightedly laughing at his near spit-take.

He sticks close to your side, an arm slung over your shoulder or around your waist. There’s a moment when he gets worried he might be smothering you, but then you’d lean your head on his shoulder and he figured you were right where you wanted to be.

The two of you step outside when the Monster Mash smashburger contest starts up, the song following you to the sun-bleached wooden deck.

There are less people out here now, a few people are stationed behind the ping-pong table and others are seated on the picnic tables chatting and swapping stories. Most of his friends had stayed inside to cheer on Coyote’s attempt to hold onto his burger eating crown.

It’s the first time all night that he has you on your own, and while he appreciates how welcoming his friends are with wanting to make you feel included and slipping in more than a few jokes at his expense, he’s ready to have you to himself for a while.

But first.

“Are you ever going to tell me what you’re supposed to be?” He runs a finger along the ruffle down the front of your shirt. “I think I’ve lost count of how many failed attempts I’ve made now and It’s starting to take a toll on my ego.”

“How about this, you tell me what you were supposed to be and then I’ll tell you what my costume is,” you offer, playfully.  

You’re still toying with him like a cat does a string and he doesn’t mind a single bit.

He steps in close, winding an arm around your low back pulling you in close. “James Bond,” he says, enjoying the way your eyes light up.

“Now that’s something I would love to see,” you murmur, running your hand along his arm. “Not that the flight suit isn’t working for me.” He grins smug because he knows exactly how much this flight suit works for you.

Rooster shakes his head amused. “I’ll put it on for you later if you want.” He grins smug because he knows exactly how much this flight suit works for you, but you haven’t seen him in a tux yet. “Now, I’ve been dying to know since the moment you walked in, what are you dressed as?”

You grin, wide and bright, like you’ve been waiting for this all night.

“Your future girlfriend, I thought it was pretty obvious.”

Bradley doesn’t waste a moment bringing both of his hands to your face and getting his lips on yours. A surprised noise escapes from the back of your throat before you’re wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him even closer.

Your full lips soften under his demanding ones, the sensual slide of your lips against his has him desperate for more. His tongue chases after the sweetness of your mouth. He can’t get enough of it.

He can’t get enough of you.

“So I take it, you like my costume then?” you ask against his lips.

“I’m about to go swipe that trophy from Cousin Itt because yours is the best one here by far.” You giggle when he pulls you back in to kiss you again- or tries to. “C’mon, sweetheart, I need you to cooperate here. I’m trying to kiss my girlfriend.”

But then his teeth click against yours because now you’ve got him smiling too.

You skim another soft kiss against his mouth and lean back. “You know, I did have a back-up costume, just in case things didn’t go well.” You put a finger up and twist a little in his arms to rummage in your purse. And when you turn back towards him you’ve got a bright red clown nose on your face.

“Are you kidding me? The only clown here is Seresin.” He chuckles and gently pulls it from off your nose. “I’ve been trying to figure out how lock this down for weeks now. That tux was going to be my ace. It’s about a half size too small, but I figured it might do the trick to make things more official. It’s a good thing I’ve got a girl who knows what she wants.”

“Don’t think you’re off the hook, Bradshaw. I still want to see you in it.”

“I can make that happen. Especially since that means I get to take you home with me tonight.” He drops a kiss on your cheek. “I’ve got an idea about what we can be next year though.”

“It’s not even midnight yet, and you’re thinking about next year?”

Bradley shrugs nonchalantly. “I’m all about playing the long game. Just want to give you something to look forward to.”

“Let’s hear it then,” you say, giving him an expectant look.

“Considering how we met and all, I think contestants from Supermarket Sweep would be a solid choice for us. There’s nothing sexier than some khakis and sweatshirts.”

You look delighted and amused and like his.

“Done. You know I am a big fan of you in a pair of khakis.”

Rooster tugs you to him again needing to taste your grin. He hears a cheer go up inside of the bar, probably for whoever won the contest, but he pretends it’s for him.

After all, he’s the one who got the girl.

Happy Halloween! I'm dropping a smitten Rooster into everyone's candy bucket this year! Thank you for reading!

You can read my other stories here!

taglist:

@gretagerwigsmuse @sehnsuchts-trunken  @callsignspark @notroosterbradshaw @tongue-like-a-razor @laracrofted @ofstoriesandstardust @bradshawsbitch @starryeyedstories @top-hhun-main @startrekfangirl2233 @callsign-viper @teacupsandtopgun @angelbabyange @oneelleandaneye @mizzzpink @cornishkat @alana4610 @20th-centu-fairy-girl @pono-pura-vida @donttouchmycarrots @eg-dr3amer3 @whaledots-blog @a-beaverhausen @hangmanscoming @mandolin22 @theweekndhistorybook @lilpeekabooze @high-bi-imgonnacry @ahintofkiwistrawberry @ruewrote @spiderman-stilinski @jayniebop @my-soulmate-is-mycroft @imaginecrushes @keyrani @chicomonks @artemissunn @mayempress @eddiemunsonreader

[okay-j-hannah]

Lovey Dovey

Pirates of the Caribbean : Fic

Will Turner x Reader

Word Count: 1541

Warnings: Hilarious sibling banter... Will be a king treating his woman like a queen 👑 swashbuckling pirate swears

Request: “This is me absolutely begging and foaming at the mouth for you to write a Will Turner x reader. I’m fine with fluff or smut lmao. I have a couple ideas if you also want to write multiple (or blend them into 1), you totally don’t have to though. 3. Being Jack Sparrow’s (sister/close relationship) and dating Will - First of all,THE C H A O S Jack constantly bugging you about being all “lovey dovey” on his ship (even if it’s not a significant amount). Jack also always complaining in general lmao. I think this is cute because Jack being over protective of you dating Will just seems so precious to me. PLEASE INCLUDE SOME FORM OF SIBLING BANTER 🙏🏻. Having accurate sibling teasing or banter is so important when writing relationships like these! Plus Sharing a hammock below deck” @gingerdissapointment​

A/N: Jack has never been overjoyed at the thought of you and your boyfriend - especially when you’re kissing on his ship

The skies were a rich coastal blue between the clouds. The gulls gave their cries as they flew overhead, pestering the inhabitants below for a morsel to eat. The sea was gentle as it rocked the ship.

Rocked the ship and the first mate.

(Y/N) was clearly taking her position on the ship very seriously as she lay across the edge of the starboard side. Her hat drawn to keep the sun off her face, she looked as a cat might just before a long nap.

Until the captain, laden with beads and braided scarves, came from his quarters. The black, heavy lids of his eyes fell into a squint as he spotted his first mate. She did enjoy testing his authority.

Sucking on a gold tooth, Captain Jack Sparrow sauntered over, slamming a hand onto the weathered wood beneath her. “I say, man! Hoist the sails, pull anchor, and undock this ship before I find another to replace yer useless, sleepy arse.”

She barely flinched as he bombarded her beginnings of sleep. A heavily ringed hand lifted to tilt her hat back, shooting the captain a look. It clearly spoke of how disappointing his efforts had become in motivating her.

“Go back to your Tortugan women and let me doze.”

“For your information, missy – we’re not on Tortuga anymore.”

“And you’re telling me you haven’t kept a few pretties in your cabin?”

Jack chewed the inside of his cheek, speaking lowly, “You know Gibbs will cause a mutiny if he sees any woman on this ship but you.”

“Yes, and being unable to escape your persistent stupidity, I’d thought challenging Gibbs would make smuggling barmaids all the more fun.”

Hat back over her face, (Y/N) couldn’t see the way Jack flailed his arms in a pitiful attempt to express his frustration. “If I hadn’t promised mum…”

“If you hadn’t promised mum what?” she suddenly sat up, swinging her legs so she was facing him.

His expression was dry, “If I hadn’t promised to watch over you aboard this ship – I would push you off this instant – to hell with the plank.”

“You wouldn’t dare,” she smirked.

In a flash, Jack shoved her shoulder, just enough that she was caught off balance. And the fear that flashed across her face, however short lived, made him smile. “You should be kinder to your captain.”

He went for the wheel, fishing for his compass. (Y/N) slid from her spot, stomping after him, “You really would let me fall in?”

“You can swim.”

She punched his shoulder and he winced.

“You wouldn’t last a week on the seas without me.”

It was the usual bickering between the captain and the first mate. And many of the crew had to dodge as buckets of water and empty rum bottles flew at each other. There was rarely a voice of reason between the two – Gibbs had given up after an incident with a sea turtle and a peg leg – making only one option for a mediator.

“Mr. Will Turner,” Gibbs laughed gruffly, “’Bout time you came aboard.”

Will raised his eyebrows, stepping off the boarding plank, “Are things really so severe without me here?”

A wooden chair came flying from the captain’s quarters, splintering against the wheel. A second later (Y/N) came bounding out, a small chest in her hands, and ran to hold it over the side of the ship.

Jack cried after her, flailing his arms and tripping over the broken chair along the way, “DO NOT toss that treasure overboard.”

“What does it matter? You’re a pirate – go find some more!”

“Yes, but that chest is particularly valuable to me, and I would sorely miss it’s contents. So kindly return it before I tie you to the mast and let the seagulls shit down your pretty face.”

Will coughed obnoxiously and both siblings turned to face him. “What’s so important about the chest?”

(Y/N) grinned, “Will!” She let go of the treasure chest and ran for him. Jack yelled as he dove for the chest, catching it just before it fell over the edge.

“Why must you pester your brother?” Will asked, hugging her tight and kissing her cheek, “I would rather he be reasonable when I visit – he’s not overly fond of me.”

She grabbed his face and gave him a proper kiss, “I don’t care what my brother thinks.” She kissed him hard, losing balance.

A retching could be heard from behind them, “I’d sooner battle the kraken than watch you two swabbing tongues.” Jack sauntered back to his cabin, “We’re leaving in an hour.”

“He’s just jealous the longest he’s ever had a partner was overnight.”

Will snickered, taking her hand, “Best leave him be. I want you all to myself tonight.”

Jack poked his head out of the door, “And if I catch any lovey dovey nonsense on my ship, you can walk the plank and get your quota of kisses from the sharks!”

(Y/N) bit her lip, dragging Will by the hand and below deck.

“Did you hear me?” Jack cried almost desperately, “You keep that hand a safe distance from her!”

“I don’t care how much you fight,” Will said as they descended the stairs, “Jack loves you.”

“He’s protective, is all,” (Y/N) sighed, “I wish he showed he cared in other ways. Like letting me have first pick in a treasure hoard.”

They laughed and kissed all the way to the hammocks used for sleeping while sailing the seas. (Y/N) pushed him into one and jumped on top of him. The hammock swung from the jump, their tangled limbs fitting snug into a cocoon. (Y/N) wrapped herself around him, feeling safe and warm and vulnerable next to him.

“I want to tell you something,” Will whispered to her, running his fingers lightly down her arm.

She squirmed at the tickling, “What is it?”

“I’ve been meeting with the Port Royal banks, building a line of credit with them.”

(Y/N) became very still, her thumb trailing down his ribs, “Why do that? You already own the smithery.”

“I sold it.”

She sat up, hand against his chest, “Why do that? You’re an excellent blacksmith.”

His eyes were shining in the dim light, “I’m buying you a ship. A ship for us.”

“What?” There was a smile on her lips like she didn’t believe him, “A real ship?”

“I’m doing it the right way,” he mumbled, “It takes longer, but… We’ll have a home on the sea.”

She giggled, “A real ship? With a crew?”

“If you want.”

“And you’ll be the captain and I’ll be the first mate,” she grinned, running a hand up his neck to hold his cheek.

Will smiled fondly, “You will be captain. And I’ll be your first mate.”

(Y/N) marveled at him, getting quiet when she said, “I love you.”

“I love you too.” And he tilted his head to catch her lips, gripping her tight by the waist.

She kept ahold of his cheek, giggling as he tickled her sides. They were too preoccupied to hear a set of footsteps tromping down the stairs.

“Oh, God! Damned Davy Jones. What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

(Y/N) fell into Will’s shoulder, sighing, “What does it look like we’re doing?”

“Not on my ship, missy. Not. On. My. Ship.”

“Oh, sod off,” (Y/N) yelled, “Grab your rum and go.”

“I’m going to be honest with you, mate,” Jack pointed a wavering finger, “If you don’t get your sticky paws off my sister, I’m going to chain you to a cannonball and throw you overboard for the kraken to eat.”

(Y/N) toppled out of the hammock, “Jack you’re taking it a little far. Will’s been nothing but good to me since we’ve known him. I don’t understand this vendetta you have against him.”

“He’s… well, there’s something about him.” Jack twiddled his fingers, “And I promised – I swore to mum that I’d…” He suddenly became quiet, “That I’d look after you.”

Her heart softened, “And you’ve done a pretty damn good job so far.” She knew he needed to hear it, “And I’m not asking you to stop looking after me. I’m asking that you let someone else help. Someone good and kind. And a partner for me – I’m sorry captain, but that’s not something you can give me.” She tried at a smile.

And Jack did have the slightest crack of his lips, “You were always going to outgrow me.”

Will came up behind (Y/N) and placed an arm around her shoulders. Surprisingly Jack didn’t retort, “You’re not the only one that cares about her.”

“I’m still not a fan of the lovey dovey nonsense.”

“That’s fine,” (Y/N) laughed, “We’re gonna do it anyway.”

Jack laughed too, taking a step back and making for the stairs. He snatched a bottle of rum from the stores as he said, “Put a sock on the cabin door next time. I already have enough trauma without seeing whatever you two do alone.”

And that was about as close as Jack was going to get in saying he accepted his sister dating. Will gripped her side and whispered jovially in her ear.

“You want to get all lovey dovey?”

“Let me grab a sock first.”

~~~

Tag List:

@caswinchester2000 @aria253264 @bippity-boppity-boopa @kaqua @cameleonfrenzy @shyposttree 

Remember to check out my tag list so you’re updated when a fic you like is posted on my blog! Tag List

[dean-samw67]

Will requests

This is me absolutely begging and foaming at the mouth for you to write a Will Turner x reader. I’m fine with fluff or smut lmao. I have a couple ideas if you also want to write multiple (or blend them into 1), you totally don’t have to though.

1. A Will Turner A-Z smut list

I literally haven’t seen one of these for Will ANYWHERE. He needs one so bad lmao 😭

2. Fluff about Will’s hands

It’s mentioned in Curse of The Black Pearl how Will has “Blacksmith’s hands”. Personally, I find the contrast of his rough hands and caring demeanor really adorable .

3. Being Jack Sparrow’s (sister/close relationship) and dating Will

First of all,

THE C H A O S

Jack constantly bugging you about being all “lovey dovey” on his ship (even if it’s not a significant amount). Jack also always complaining in general lmao. I think this is cute because Jack being over protective of you dating Will just seems so precious to me. PLEASE INCLUDE SOME FORM OF SIBLING BANTER 🙏🏻. Having accurate sibling teasing or banter is so important when writing relationships like these!

4. Idk how to title this one but it kind of fits the category

Being Jacks sister but also constantly making berth at Port Royale when you were younger, results in a close friendship between you and a certain Mr. Will Turner.

You both were thick as thieves, always doing things together like helping him in the smithery, weaving through marketplaces, delivering the swords he made, dangling your feet off the peer, learning to sword fight, and (sigh) listening to him ramble about ElIzaBeTh. (I love her but for the sake of this, no [or maybe do idk lmao])

The killer is, you always told Will your brother was a merchant and that you would accompany him on his trips, which is why you were constantly in and out of Port Royal. In reality, you were always off doing pirate things with Jack. But remember!- Will doesn’t like pirates, so maybe theres no harm in not telling him. Great idea!

(Can you smell the sarcasm?)

Consequently, the day Jack broke into Mr. Brown’s smithery, you later arrived with Will. This resulted in a 2 on 1 fight (or maybe not) with a lot of confused looks being shared between Jack and yourself. When the reader decides to reveal their identity to Will is all up to you though!

Drag it out or get straight to the point, whatever you think will work best. I just need some good ol’ tension.

5. Protective Will [(T/W)- Possible wolf whistling, harassment, and creepy stuff like that]- all hypotheticals not a must. Do not feel compelled to include these aspects, they are just little pieces of inspiration to help you get started.

It just always comforts me when there are scenarios about the character of choice protecting the reader from a creepy guy/group of guys/sketchy actions. I can also suggest a scenario for this!

It probably would be similar to the scene in Dead Man’s Chest of Elizabeth being in a connected jail cell with a bunch of assholes that we’re whistling at her. But in this scenario (hopefully) that will not last for long depending on Will’s reaction.

Bunch of fluff ideas

On you period

Stargazing on the Black Pearl

Childhood friends to lovers

Him finding out you were a pirate

Having to rescue him

Reuniting after he goes on a separate expedition -(describe how he got tanner/ more freckled/ longer/curlier hair/smells like salt water/ more muscley)

How would he show his affection

Dancing together in a Tortugan pub

Bar fights in said Tortugan pub

Playing with his hair

Him defending your honor 😤 someone talks bad about you as a (pirate/ pirate lieutenant/ captain/ person/ makes creepy comments/ etc.) so he defends you

How he would cuddle you

How he would kiss you

Sharing a hammock below deck

Okay so I can say I am not taking requests really at the moment but I love the thought of writing for Will more. I will keep all of these ideas on the list and definitely get around to them. (I'll tag you in it too so you can see when they are posted) I can't promise I'll write them quick but I'll do them as I can! I'll probably start once I'm done moving! Thank you for these requests. Maybe you just helped with my writing slump! ❤️

[killyourrdarlingss]

orchid, ivy and nutmeg!! <3

Get to know me better asks! || Ask here

-

orchid ⇢ what’s a song you consider to be perfect?

I think it would have to be King Crimson's 'the terrifying tale of thela hun ginjeet' also, Home by Depeche mode is also so good, any Depeche mode song tbh, I end up like SCREAMING the lyrics ♥️ any old 80s song.

ivy ⇢ what are your ‘tells’ for your emotions and moods? how can someone tell you’re happy, annoyed, upset or tired?

Oh apparently it's super obvious but I don't think so? If I'm not feeling well I'm so good at lying and being like 'nah all good!' but I bitch later on, lmao.

nutmeg ⇢ how’s your room/home decorated? do you have a specific theme or style going on?

YES... honestly every part of my house is decorated but my room is special, I have what I lovingly call the 'Man Wall' which is a wall of men. A bunch of men I put up and look at and go ':) men.'

It's like, I'm sure my parents have come in at some point and been like ... "Hm." But it means everything to me, I'll put a picture below.

But also my entire living room? Decked out in merch/statues/figurines, I have a giant cardboard cutout of batman .... Yeah

[s0lar-ch3ri]

I HAVE MORE (with spoilers obvi)

ollie finds out how periods work when jay starts hers

"Why is Miss Jay still not here? Is she okay?" Everyone already was up besides Jay, and Ollie didn't know what happened. He was worried for her.

"Ah, don't you let it get to ya. It's Jay, she'll be fine. Just, uh, maybe don't bother her." Chip ruffled his hair, but he still felt confused. "Bother her?"

"She says her tummy hurty Chip, also to answer that like just don't yell, which is what we do all the time so just don't!" Gillion ironically yelled out from the below deck, only for him to seemingly be hit with something then apologize.

A couple hours passed and Ollie's worry didn't disappear. After building up some courage, Ollie went downstairs to check in. Plus, the crew kept on doing checks and Ollie simply would do it this time.

He found Jay rolled over in bed, groaning seeming to be in pain. "I swear to god Chip if- oh hi Ollie. Please, just don't freak out, I'm fine." Jay didn't even need to look at him to see that he was worried. As she turned to face him, she could hear his breath trying to steady as he looked around the room. As he looked around, he noticed a box with some white things inside. "I-Are you-I mean-What's going on?"

"You didn't get a health class back at Zero yet, huh? It's a thing females get called periods and the cramps can hurt like hell."

Jay could see he still felt very confused and had some questions. She didn't have anything else to do, so they just sat there and talked.

ok so my phones an asshole so i cant exactly make the text small and shit so sorry also yes theyd have pads on deck also alternative version of this where gill doesnt know how periods work and ollie explains it to him

"Hey, uh, Ollie? What do you know about women?" Oliver had thought he'd gotten used to Gillion's tendency to say "silly" questions out of nowhere, yet he never was.

"I'd be scared to answer at all if you were anyone else, but yeah. I know some things about women." Oliver chuckled and put down the towel he was using, turning to face Gillion. "What's up?"

"Well, I heard about this thing, where women have a 'time of month' where they just bleed and basically experience hell. I was wondering what you may know, since even if those of the Undersea got them too, I didn't know."

"Oh, you mean periods. Yeah, I've heard it sucks, don't know how my mom dealt with them. Plus the mood swings were kinda icky."

Gillion seemed to be surprised at all the new information. What went on in his mind was a mystery to Ollie. "Wow. There is...quite a bit I don't know. If you aren't busy, mind teaching me a bit more?"

"Why not ask Jay? It's not that I'm not happy to help, it's just that Jay actually gets them and sh--hhhhhhtuft." Oliver almost let a swear slip. God these idiots were rubbing off on him still.

"Because Jay is still bleeding out her legs and said to leave her alone!" "Shit."

originally i wrote both ideas in my head while on my period which started day 1 of my accelerated math classes so veru comfort indeed also yes i wanted a bit of sillyness cause its them so why not anyways the idea of oliver also could be blessed by the gods for no reason (like gill idk why i love that duo)

i sadly have no clue how to write this one but its a funny idea that ollie is also blessed by the gods lmao

next idea but just the animals on board just gravitate towards ollie

(id wanna actually make a fic first for this idea so id rather wait for that)

next idea is pride month themed (plus one of my hcs for ollie) but ACE SPECTRUM OLIVER!!!! (its really aroace but im open to ideas, also abro may work)

So this was what plagued his mind now. Not just the fact that he'll have to either say goodbye to the Albatross or not see his mom again, but also how he'd tell anyone about this self realization. He didn't even think it was that important, I mean not having attraction to anything would mean less distractions? Yet he felt like he'd explode if he didn't. He hated being confused like this.

Well, there's nothing he figured that they could do if Ollie did tell them he's aroace. God he still was nervous. Did he want to tell them all at once? Should he just tell one of them? Who would he tell first? Why was he so anxiety ridden? Even knowing how accepting they could be, there was still the doubt of being seen differently by them for the worse. Well, no time like the present to start.

"Hey Chip, could I talk to you for a sec?"

I LOVE ME A CLIFF HANGER BABYYYYY anyways im lazy for more writing so take the ideas alone

ollie learns about autism (autistic fish man)

finds out chip is trans (or vice-versa lol)

somehow puddle makes ollie able to perform healing magic or smth (I ENJOY HEALING MAGIC OLIVER OKAY???)

ollie makes friendship bracelets or smth

ollie stickers gill's armor (he just can have stickers because why not)

ollie with a GUN

modern day oliver pulls the eviliest of pranks on the crew for april fools: he signs them up for therapy.

either puddle or pretzel comforting ollie when hes up late being sad

pretzel teachs ollie blood lust and they make (and commit aince otd def be crack) murder plans for those who've wronged their friends

ollie sees a guy being weird to jay and clocks him in the nose (also works for like a high school modern [thats what i mean by modern ollie btw lmao] au, either way i love the idea of a guy being a creep and this small 12 or so year old child breaks his nose for it because he respects women ✨️)

navy seal but chip kinda liked gill so felt bumped about being dumped and oliver decides to help comfort him (maybe by telling him how when he was 6 he got dumped by his crush and is still slaying idk /hj)

yall knwo that onw post where the persons friends were all in a polygamous relationship and thats why they felt so left out and they just didnt know? thats ollie after he finds out that maybe chip and gill kissed more then once before and then chip has to talk to him lol

ollie doesnt know people can date more then one person and is very confused when he first saw gill and chip kissing then jay and gill like just messing around with each other's hair ig (look i feel like i may make them kiss too much if i say kiss again so) and ollie misunderstanding tells chip gill cheated on him with jay

detective au where chips tryna solve a case and calls upon an officer in training to help him as shit seems to keep happening and they cant exactly wait (jay normally would help him but she's out from a broken leg and gillion [my brain says "hes still a goldfish" or "hes a car" god im still thinking bout the new spiderman movie watched it today] is handling a different case and his way of working isnt exactly how chip works)

i def have more just sont wanna dig any more lol

ollie centric fic ideas because i love this child (spoilers for jrwi)

a lot will be comforting for me because yes (they may start angst but ye) but anyways first idea is ollie has undiagnosed adhd and has always had focus problems and during one of like the meetings for the riptide pirates theyre going over a plan and ollie is just freaking out silently because he genuinely is trying to hard to focus but nothings working and chip notices and comforts him on it

As they talked, Ollie couldn't find himself able to focus in. He tried fidgeting with his hands, blocking out other sounds, forcefully staring at any of them, but nothing worked. He'd always had problems with this type of thing, but this time he couldn't find a way to focus in and it scared him. He was shaking and trying to hold back tears. What if he missed something important and didn't know what to do? What if Chip got mad that he didn't listen? He just stood there, staring at the floor as the voices around him were simply a blur of noises saying things his brain refused to comprehend.

"Hey buddy, are you feeling okay?" Chip bent down and grabbed Ollie's shoulder's gently. Ollie tried to look at him, but instead just starred at Chip's shirt. He gave a slight head shake no and kept fidgeting. With a collective look, Jay and Gill went off and left Chip to comfort his son.

would probs also add other oneshots in it of adhd ollie being the greatness he is but onto the next one, which is after a night of just not being sleepy, pretzel finds him and they just play around

So this is what being on board a pirate ship is like. Having your dad's I-think boyfriend's pet frogtopus come hang out with you in the middle of the night. For whatever reason, Ollie just didn't feel the need to sleep. He hadn't stayed up, he just didn't want to. Here he was now, drawing in the crow's nest, looking at the moon.

Then he heard the purr. There wasn't any cats on deck, and he knew he didn't purr. When he looked up, right on the rails was Pretzel.

"Pretzel!? What are you doing up, Gillion may get worried..." Having been around her so much, everyone onboard could read her expressions well enough as though she was speaking to them. She gave Ollie the look of "I should be asking you".

"Okay, fair." Ollie continued on drawing. Pretzel climbed onto his shoulder and watched as he drew. As she climbed back down, Ollie shrugged, thinking she got tired and went back to bed. However, barely a minute later, she returned with a set of water proof markers neatly in a bag.

"ARE THOSE GILLION'S?! PRETZEL YOUR GONNA-" She lifted a tentacle to Oliver's mouth and started showing the different colors to him. While the shade names were off by one, together they worked to color the drawings he made.

yes hed carry markers around duh anyways next fic idea where ollie, being his aged up self, asks chip if he could try the bandana of disguise out

"Chip, I wanna try something..." Ollie had thought of the idea before, but never really knew when he should ask. While Ollie had gotten used to this taller adult form, he didn't enjoy it much still. It felt off putting at times and Oliver couldn't tell if he'd ever go back to being small.

"Yeah, what's up?" Chip was undisguised and the bandana fit well in his messy hair. He had a matching one that Chip bought him, but it wasn't magical like his. He didn't even realize until now that the old one was tied around his wrist.

"Could I maybe try something with your disguise bandana?" Chip, with only an eyebrow raise, took it off and handed it to him. "What prank you tryna pull my boy?" Chip had a cheeky grin on his face.

"No prank, just, um, seeing something." After a brief explanation, Ollie tried it out. He was a bit nervous, but he thought of the image he wanted to become. Within an instant, he went from looking down at Chip, to having to look up at Chip.

i do got more but i got homework to do so ill make more later

[assassins-and-hidden-blades]

Trust Me -- Part 2

02/06/2021: Wow, uh, wow. This one got me. Almost started crying at the cheesy ending. I will cringe at it in precisely two months from now. Thank you guys SO much for all the positive feedback of PART 1, it really helped me finish this part. Without you guys, this would have been still sitting in my drafts. There's lowkey a bit of pressure in this actually being GOOD, so I'm sitting here with a bit of Imposter SyndromeTM and crossing everything I can cross that you guys like it. I can't tell whether I went overboard or not, though... I guess that's for you guys to tell me lmao.

Also, these commas can be pried from my very cold, extremely dead, fingers.

As always, feedback is greatly appreciated! For the first time in almost ever, I'm a bit very nervous to post this -- I hope you enjoy it!!

Tagging: @marshmallow--3 // @yourlocalfrenchie // @rahdaleigh // @sofiewithat /// @iceboundstar // @mythandmagik // @itseivwhore // @pink-polarfox // @missbenzayb // @ct-5445 // @timbreavery // @dacian-assassin // @thepalaceofmelanie // @asilverraven // @huntheimpossible // @eclectic--assassin // @thehistorynut19 // @ta-ka-shi-ma // @roki3chocoa // @fandomsfanman // @le-nottibianche // @bandit-brunsmeier // @starmoji1 // @spocktheestallion // @salty-thembo // @missingfrye // @xdeimos // If you want to be tagged, let me know!!

Warnings: Lots of swearing, a bit of graphic violence, implicit mention of sexual assault (I hope it's not a spoiler to say that this does not actually happen, but the idea is used as manipulation. It's not done well, but I'm blaming that on the character being a horrible liar, instead of me sucking at write arseholes), implied character death.

Pairing: Edward Kenway x F!Reader

Assassin's Creed Mobile Masterlist

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The neighbouring ship was chaotic. The opponents were drunk on victory, so slipping through unnoticed was easy. The hard part was going to be staying undercover until you could free Edward and the rest of the crew without anyone falling casualty. “Strip them of their weapons and take them to the brig!” You heard the Quartermaster yell. Thinking quickly, you moved to Edward; if you knew where his weapons were, escaping could be much easier. People were already pulling out his pistols and cutlasses, fortunately dumping them in your arms. Looking around, you pulled away to hide them in an inconspicuous barrel for later.

You weren’t planning on staying long.

Quickly rejoining the group, you took hold of one of your crew members -- you recognised him as one named Jonah -- at the back of the crowd, keeping your face covered lest they accidentally reveal your identity. You kept your eye on Edward’s tense shoulders the entire time, heading below deck and to the rows of cells at the end of the ship.

As you gently pushed Jonah into the cell, someone slammed the door shut, chucking the ring of keys your way. “Lock ‘em up.” Swallowing, you nodded, feeling uncomfortable under their gaze while turning the key in the lock. Taking them out of your hands, a mop and bucket was shoved in its place. “You’re on cleaning duty, starting upstairs; let’s go.” With one last glance, your eyes scoured for Edward before they all disappeared from view.

----------

Edward

There was this crushing anxiety he just couldn’t shake. It rendered him almost motionless, crouched in the corner of the cell, picking at his sleeves. There was a commotion heading towards them; he was in for company he was not in the mood for.

Heavy footsteps gave away the visitor. “We searched your boat.” His crew parted to clear a view as Charles Marlowe relaxed against the cell bars. “We found your woman.”

Edward’s eyes snapped to Marlowe’s as he clenched his jaw, almost daring him to say more.

With a chuckle and a disgusting grin, he brought out a small knife to clean. “Don’t you want to know where she is?”

“I expect you’d would tell me regardless.”

“I would advise against winding me up, Kenway. I could always take my anger out on her instead.”

It took a second for Edward’s arms to fly through the bars, constricting around Marlowe’s throat. “What have you done with her?”

Although cold metal pressed against his jaw, he didn’t ease up.

“She’s waiting for me very nicely... in my cabin.”

Edward didn’t have to think very hard to infer his meaning.

“I’ll kill you if you touch her. I’ll kill you.” Growling, he held impossibly tighter, for if he was here, he wasn’t there.

“With your actions come consequences, Kenway. And you might not be the one paying for them.”

A dilemma came to mind: delay him to keep him away from you, or risk the consequences of his revenge?

Somewhat luckily, he didn’t need to choose.

Before Edward could comprehend that he loosened his grip, Marlowe slipped out of his grasp. The distraught Captain pressed himself against the bars, anger drenching his expression as he heaved out breaths. His captor laughed. “You’re very good at empty threats, Kenway.”

“It’s not a threat. It’s a promise.” His cold tone streaked through the crew, setting hairs on end. They had never heard their Captain like this before; so angry, so dangerous.

It terrified them.

“That remains to be seen. In the meantime…” With a mocking whistling tune, Marlowe spun on his heels and began to walk away.

“Come back here, bilge rat!” He pulled harshly against the cell door. “Don’t you dare touch her!”

“Then you better stay in line.”

As he disappeared from view, Edward’s emotions overwhelmed him, frustrated tears coming to his eyes. He turned to a solid wall, slamming the side of his fist against it and yelled.

Fear, anger, guilt, and grief echoed around the brig.

Collapsing against the wood, he hid his face in his hands, aiming to either calm himself or hide his inevitable breakdown.

----------

Y/N

“Finish up downstairs.” Nodding affirmatively, you picked up the mop bucket and eagerly headed beneath deck, having to consciously slow down to avoid suspicion. You were glad you were disguised in the uniform of Marlowe’s crew instead of the rags of the common sailors aboard; it would’ve made the job much harder than it had to be.

Keeping a level head, you walked past the cell holding your family and placed the mop bucket against the wall, scanning the deck.

Empty.

Sighing in relief, you realised that you were alone with your crew at last. As you pulled the covering off of your face, you shushed frantically, the cell almost erupting into cheers. You gestured for them to part, eyeing Edward, almost balled up in the corner of the cell. “Hey, Ed,” you whispered, watching as his head snapped up to you, eyes widening.

Scrambling up, he strode to the bars in a second, reaching through the gaps to hold you. “Thank Christ…” he exhaled in relief, bringing your forehead to his lips between the bars. You pulled away after a few moments, sharing relieved glances. “Are you hurt? Did they do anything to you?” he asked, eyes scanning you for any sign of injuries.

“No, no, I’m okay. Are you alright? Did we lose anyone?”

“I’m... fine; I haven’t done a head count yet.”

You didn’t reply, watching as Jonah came up to tap Edward on the shoulder. “Capt’n?”

He turned around, withdrawing his hands as Ryan came into view. “I can’t find my da’.” His voice was barely stable, cheeks stained with tear tracks. For a second, you both exchanged sorrowful glances.

Edward crouched down, ruffling his hair. “He’ll be around, lad. We just have to find him. Maybe he’s escaped and is planning his own rescue mission for us.”

Ryan nodded, wanting to believe him. Meanwhile, Edward stood and brought Jonah close, leaning to whisper in his ear. He withdrew, a willing but uncertain look on his face. Both retreated back into the small crowd.

“What did you tell him?” you asked.

“...That he has to look after Ryan now.”

You squeezed your eyes shut to stave off tears. “Shit.”

His fingers gently grazed your cheek. “Are you sure you’re alright? Does Marlowe know you’re here?”

Frowning, you shook your head. “I wouldn’t have thought so; if he did, I’d be stuck in there with you.”

His expression was nearly unreadable, but you could sense his anxiety. “I saw him come from here a few moments ago. What was he saying?”

“He…” Pausing for a moment, Edward swallowed. “Just Templar bullshit.”

You scoffed at the notion. “Of course he did. Look, I know how to get out of this.”

“I’ll take anything at this point.” Although his tone was sarcastic, you could tell that for the first time, he didn’t know what to do.

“He needs to die.”

Edward froze, brows narrowing, realising your intention. “No, Y/N, no.”

“‘No’ was an option in Nassau, but we don’t have that choice--”

“No, there must be another way -- “

“There is no other way! This is our only chance--”

“Are you hearing me?! He--”

“Do you understand the situation we’re in?!”

“No, Y/N, please--”

“All it takes is--”

“Just LISTEN to me!” He hissed through gritted teeth, grasping your arm to give it a sharp shake to stop you talking over him. The shock threw you into silence. Lowering his voice, he continued. “If you make so much as one mistake, he won’t just kill you; he’ll make you wish you were dead. Please, please, don’t do this.”

You were stunned. You’ve never seen him so adamant about staying your blade. The desperation in his tone threw you off; you’ve never heard him this serious -- this frantic -- before.

Edward grabbed one of your hands in both of his, bringing your knuckles to rest against his lips. “I love you… with everything I have; I can’t lose you. Not if I can help it,” he murmured, closing his eyes. Your heart broke as you watched a tear escape, trailing down his skin.

“Okay, okay.” You rarely saw Edward cry, and when you did, it was usually due to either drinking or laughing. He took a small, shuddering breath, trying to compose himself.

“We wait for Adé. Then we’ll think about Marlowe.”

“Alright, okay. Hey...” you caressed his jaw. “I’m okay. We’ll be okay. Trust me.”

You heard ruckus above the deck. “Someone’s coming.” Both of you broke away like shrapnel, Edward sitting himself on the floor while you mopped, facing the wall.

And that was how things were.

----------

A couple of weeks had passed since the crew was abducted from the Jackdaw. Everyone had been forced to labour on the deck, doing various jobs, from scrubbing floors to adjusting sails to everything in between. Adé was nowhere to be seen; whether he was hidden on deck and still strategising, or God forbid, something worse, you didn’t know.

A few didn’t make it.

Keeping your identity hidden was becoming increasingly difficult as time went on, of both being a woman and lover of the imprisoned Captain. You had, however, been able to gather intel of Marlowe from the crew that despised him. Each day further validated your belief that this man would be much better off dead; the crew have no loyalty except out of fear, and you could work with that.

You understood Edward’s fear, but it would be selfish of you to stand back and not do anything, watching as almost everyone on the ship suffered; if you did nothing, you would regret it for the rest of your days.

One particular morning was extremely hot, extremely dry, and extremely labour intensive. You were almost halfway through your journey, and you knew you were running out of time. Something had to happen, and soon, or you would never make it to the end of the year.

----------

Edward

After the first week, the crew joined the common sailors around the ship, performing average labour over hours. There was barely time to rest, eat, or drink; he could tell that this was wearing him down more than any form of torture.

The sun’s rays beat down on the nape of his neck as midday approached. Orders were to scrub the floor. He had a brush in his hand the size of a polishing brush, sharing a bucket with four other members of his crew. Each time he made eye contact with one of them, he’d give them a reassuring look; they’d all get out of this, he just needed a plan.

Doors were haphazardly flung open, Marlowe revealing himself from his cabin, followed by an entourage of his closest crew. They clumsily made their way across the ship, bumping into those scrubbing the deck, only to send them a look as if it was their fault in the first place.

One of them knocked over a bucket of water, spilling the liquid across the wood. Edward looked up to observe the situation. It belonged to his crew, including Jonah and Ryan. Marlowe stopped, his stare set on the ones kneeling, completely ignoring the real culprit. “You.” He crooked his finger towards Ryan. “Get up.”

With a petrified look on his face, Ryan stumbled to his feet, shaking like a leaf. “It wasn’t--”

Marlowe put his hand up, a warning to shut up. “It was your bucket, was it not?”

“Y-Yes, but--”

“So it was your responsibility, correct?”

“W-Well--”

“It’s a ‘yes’ or ‘no’ question, boy.”

“... Yes, sir.”

Marlowe turned to call to his second in command. “Get the cat.”

Edward’s heart stopped. By now, the ship had dropped to complete silence. They wouldn’t… he was only a boy. Marlowe was sadistic, but he wouldn’t be that evil, would he?

Before he could stop himself, Edward found himself standing protectively in front of Ryan. The child gripped onto his sleeve as he was pushed behind his Captain by the arm. “Why don’t you give a punishment to someone who deserves it?”

Marlowe held a neutral expression. “You’re right…” With a wave of his hand, arms snaked themselves around Edward’s, pulling him away from the others, restraining his movements.

Edward’s eyes flitted to Ryan for a split second; he was pulled to sit beside Jonah before he gained any more unwanted attention. Marlowe came to stand in front of him, unpinning his cape from around his shoulders. It fell into someone’s arms, who carried it away. Although his limbs were pulled harshly behind him, he held his head high, a hard expression in his eyes.

Undoing his cuffs, Marlowe smirked. “I believe you deserve twenty, in place of that boy…” Without warning, a fist came into contact with Edward’s sternum. If it weren’t for the arms holding him upright, the force would have sent his knees buckling. As he regained his breath, he glared at Marlowe. “Another twenty is in order for disobedience…” Another strike winded him again, this one seemingly worse than before. Keeled over, hair blocking his vision, he almost didn’t notice Marlowe leaning into his ear. “Then, about as many as I deem fit…”

Standing up straight, he shook out his hand. “Get him ready.”

Edward stumbled as he was half-dragged across the deck to the main mast. His chest and face collided with the post, the wood almost burning his skin. His arms were pulled taut above his head, rope quickly entwining itself around his wrists. He gave them an experimental tug, his heart skipping a beat when he found not even an inch of give.

Oh, fuck.

Hands gripped the back of his shirt, swiftly tearing it open. His muscles tensed as the sunlight hit his skin. Closing his eyes, he steeled himself with a breath.

The first strike licked his skin, the force shoving him against the post, ripping open stripes of flesh. Pain shot across his back. Biting a back a groan, Edward clenched his jaw. Sweat trailed down his temples, arms straining against the ropes.

Resting his forehead against the post, he prepared for the next lash.

But the strike never came.

----------

Y/N

Ooh, boy.

You were shocked at yourself for a moment, your hand firmly wrapped around Marlowe’s extended wrist, the cat of nine tails trickling Edward’s blood onto the back of your hand.

“I demand satisfaction.”

Gasps and muttering littered the crowd, and you kept to yourself the true realisation of what you’ve done.

You’ve challenged Marlowe to a duel.

“Don’t…” Edward looked over his shoulder, voice loud enough for only you to hear.

You spared him a side glance, urging him to quiet down.

Instead of the expected anger, Marlowe chuckled. “Alright; who demands it?”

You pulled off your face covering and hat, the sun hitting the skin on your face fully for the first time in two weeks. “Naturally, me.”

He hummed darkly, eyes narrowing with recognition. “Naturally.” He began to unsheathe his sword.

“I thought you were a man of tradition; are pistols not your forte?” You raised an eyebrow, challenging him.

After a prolonged glance, metal clicked back into its leather hold. “You really don’t know what you’re getting into, my dear.”

“Don’t call me that.”

“... Let’s get this over with.”

Your heart pounded. This was such a stupid move.

But it was also your only move.

Hiding your own fear, you held eye contact with Marlowe. With trembling fingers, you drew your own pistol, gifted to you by Edward from your last birthday. It was very much your lucky charm, and you hoped it wouldn’t fail you now.

“Ten paces, on my count.” You had no idea who the voice belonged to, nor did you have the current emotional capacity to care. Pulling the hammer down on your pistol, you turned your back to Marlowe. A blank was fired, the echoing shot a signal to start moving.

1…

2…

3...

It was almost deadly quiet.

4…

5…

6…

This was stupid, this was a bad idea. You won’t make it.

7…

8--

An unexpected shot rang out. You dropped to the floor, a pain beginning to blossom in your side.

“NO!”

Marlowe had cheated. Internally, you scoffed. Of course he did.

Although it stung, you were surprised at how bearable the pain was, given you just got shot.

Or did you?

You lay still, partly in shock and partly to plan what to do next.

“What are you all looking at? Get back to work!”

“Y/N? Y/N/N!” You heard Edward’s voice crack. “You cheating bastard!”

“Now, now, Kenway. Don’t forget the position you’re in.”

Floorboards creaked as someone approached. Pistol miraculously still in hand, you waited for as long as possible. Just a little longer....

A shadow shaded your face from the sun. Without thinking, you turned, aimed, and shot.

Marlowe stared back, glassy eyed, blood trickling down his nose.

A moment later, he collapsed.

No one dared to move, choosing to stare at the body in front of them, not quite believing that he was dead.

The monster of a man was dead.

After the adrenaline ebbed away, you sighed heavily. “Glad that’s over.” A hand came into view, offering assistance to stand up. You locked eyes with someone who should have made himself known a long time ago. “Adé!” Accepting the help, you smirked. “Great timing.”

You quickly moved to Edward to begin untying the knots around his wrists. “What the fuck were you thinking?!” he exclaimed, exertion clear in his eyes.

“I’m sorry for worrying you--”

“Worrying me?” One wrist freed, he deftly moved to the other. “When I saw you lying there, I felt as if I had died!”

You sighed. “I needed to do something, lest you became more bone than back.”

“That was the most stupid plan I’ve ever seen in my life.” His hands free, he paid no heed to his own wounds and immediately tried to inspect yours. “You were so irresponsible--”

Bringing his face to yours, you stopped him talking with a kiss.

He diffused immediately, finally processing that you were in front of him, alive, and Marlowe was the one dead on the floor. Melting into you, the tension in his muscles dissipated, replaced only with relief. He broke apart from you, burying his face in your neck, his arms wrapped around you tightly.

“If the plan worked, it couldn’t have been that stupid,” you remarked.

“I’m so sorry.” His words were mumbled into your shoulder.

“You were looking out for me; I would have done the same if the roles were reversed.” You hugged him back, recoiling when he suddenly flinched in pain. “Oh, God, I’m sorry.”

“Shall we just accept each other’s apologies and call it a day?”

You laughed. “That would be good.”

Turning to the hands on deck, you raised your pistol in the air. “It’s over, lads! We can go home!”

You held your side, the pain greatly subsided under the amount of other emotions you were feeling; joy, relief, but also grief. Not for Marlowe, but for the ones that didn’t see this day.

You made a vow there and then; a vow to live your life the way they would have lived.

With joyful, carefree fun.

With the ability to live in the moment.

With gratitude for what you still have that they lost: For some, love, and for others, life.

[nais-doodles]

THE FINAL PRODUCT AHHHH. This took a lot out of me but I am so proud of how it came together in the end, ahhhh.

Here are the original sketches if you’re curious as to how everyone looked originally.

Obligatory ask for you to click through

And finally, finally, my headcanons below the cut, so ya’ll don’t have to be bogged down with them. Warning, it’s kinda long

Hi, I put off making pancakes to write this

Lucifer

Lucifer owns a private detective agency (Edit: It’s got a name now! Morningstar Detective Agency, courtesy of the lovely @impastaz309), and all the brothers are in one way or another involved in it

The agency works with the police in the more secretive cases, usually ‘important’ people going missing under mysterious circumstances, drug trafficking etc.

Though he’s the head, a lot of the time he’s handling paperwork which helps cover the brothers and his back, especially since some of the stuff they do, and links they have with other people and organisations, could be exploited at their expense.

He’s looking at satan btw lmao

Running a detective agency and also keeping tabs on his brothers is very hard ™ so Lucifer is just, tired, all the time. Please give him a shoulder rub and smooches

Mammon

Usually used as bait, believe it or not, therefore his existence is somewhat of a mystery. He has to keep a low profile.

If you asked someone in the street, unless they were really involved in the agency (which they wouldn’t be), has a high ranking in the police (unlikely), or any of the other organisations the agency associates with (probably not) they wouldn’t know he exists

Mammon is very good at his job, organising meetings with middlemen, smooth talking his way out of situations, getting even the criminals themselves to come and meet him without a mediator

He is only ever used when they agency or police know with absolute certainty that the person they’ll be catching will be arrested without fail - which is of course impossible to know, so it’s always a gamble when they pull Mammon out of the deck

Good luck dating him because this guy can’t really go in public for too long at a time

Leviathan 

He works at a newspaper agency, or at least that’s what they want you to think

In reality the whole reporter business is a front, and Leviathan is an information broker. Or rather, the head of a small group of information brokers.

The city is big, and one person alone isn’t enough to cover everything, but man is his group efficient

Every address change, every telephone call made, every booking of hotel rooms, all of it, he keeps tabs on it all

The information he’s gathered has helped the private detective agency out in a pinch many times, and will continue to do so in the future

“I’m very very busy, so please don’t call me during work, sweetheart. Especially not this particular number, that’s only for emergencies, and even then, it better be life or death, okay? Okay.”

Satan

Works in a bar. Specifically, a bar in a kinda sorta illegal underground fight club. It’s very illegal don’t let anyone fool you

A lot of the more questionable people of the city frequent this bar, and let me tell you, some people cannot keep their mouth shut once they’ve had a few drinks.

Anything Leviathan or Asmodeus can’t catch (don’t worry I’m getting there), is usually picked up by Satan via a blabbermouth who had too much to drink that night.

Satan is also pretty chummy with a lot of the fighters, and has a tendency to be the one patching up the milder injuries after fights

Therefore, he has a lot of favours he can collect, so if Lucifer ever needs some muscle that goes beyond what Beel can provide, Satan in there recommending a few of the more... smarter(?) fighters at the club.

Please don’t scratch his bar, he is a very forgiving bartender, but ruining the mahogany imported from England will have him beating the shit out of you 

Asmodeus

A bit of a celebrity, his rise to fame being both accidental and very useful

Think barbershop quartet, but he does a lot of solo work as well. The other three guys in the barbershop quartet are an absolute blast, and Asmodeus loves them to bits.

Originally, Lucifer was furious. How does he expect to work in the agency if he’s off singing at clubs and attending fancy parties? Then he realised something: Asmodeus can keep tabs on any of the more sketchy celebrities who slip through the net

So off into stardom Asmodeus went, attending lavish parties and singing at packed theatres, collecting dirt, formulating blackmail, getting only the best gossip and pulling favours along the way.

“Jen, hon, did you hear about Carter? Apparently, he’s sleeping with the daughter of the Chief of Police.” 

“Wait a minute... Asmo, isn’t she married?”

“She is most definitely married.” 

“Oh my.”

Beelzebub

Usually seen working with Belphegor, partially because, well, that’s his twin brother and he likes his brother, so why not?

And also because Belphegor always needs backup

Though he isn’t always with Belphegor, really, he’s just sent whenever Lucifer is wary of sending anyone in the agency somewhere on their own.

Think of Beel as a bodyguard of sorts. He is always there to stop things form getting physical if needs be, but he isn’t always enough on his own despite being an absolute powerhouse. So sometimes he’ll go around with someone Satan recommended too

They’re really nice actually, Beel was super surprised, you’d think they’d have no manners? (That’s because Satan gives you the nice ones Beel, thank him once in a while) 

They also all think he’s a marvel of muscle send from the gods so ya know. And they all get him cakes from that bakery he loves, so they’re all good in Beel’s book

Belphegor

You know the whole good cop bad cop routine? Yeah, Belphie is both depending on who you need for that current situation. 

Masterful in the art of manipulation, Lucifer uses him on the more tough to crack people who sit in the interrogation room

He is actually pretty good at shoving the fragmented pieces of a case together, weaving a story that gets the person being interrogated sweating bullets

Even when he is way off, he still manages to worm information out of the subject a lot faster than anyone at the police station. Point, private detective agency.

Like I said, he can be the good cop or the bad cop, though because he isn’t all that intimidating, he’s usually asked to be good cop

But dear lord he is a scary bad cop, and everyone in the police force and their mother knows it

If you got this far wow, hi, thanks! And you may or may not be happy to know I’m planning on another noir piece, this time featuring the undatables and maybe my mcs too idk yet

[trashytoastboi]

Heyyy how u doing? (Hope u good haha, love ya *smooch*) can i request hc for kid, killer and luffy with a s/o who has wings? (They're like a runaway experiment so now they have this huge black raven wings, they're like 5"6 and the wingspan is 16"4 lmao)

thank you 💖,Lysm and hope u have a great day ❤️💓💝

Heyya!🍀 I'm doing well thank you! Hope you are all good! My apologies for the super long wait on this and hope you enjoy ~

(Gender Neutral)

Headcanons: Kid, Killer, Luffy x S/O with wings

Eustass Kid

🛠 Kid was no stranger to seeing people with wings, devil fruits and even people from Skypeia shared a common trait of developing wings, though it was no leap to say that {Name's} wings were the first of their kind. Large, black wings with a wingspan that far exceeded the length of their body. He actually found it quite adorable the way their wings would drag on the floor when they walked.

🛠 Kid honestly found the way {Name} would fly to be beautiful, although... their first meeting included Kid entangling {Name} in a bit of a trap, thinking them to be some new material for his coat in the distance.

🛠 Finds the fact that their wings can reflect their mood to be hilarious. Especially when they are flustered and he watches their wings ruffling out of embarrassment.

🛠 Kid finds them to be very appealing for his partner. It adds something very unique to them. He grows very annoyed when he is sleeping next to {Name} and their wings suddenly spread and kick him out of bed.

🛠 His first assumption was a zoan type devil fruit, or perhaps a relation to one of the sky islands. He never knew about {Name's} past until he heard that they were in fact a side project of Dr. Vegapunk's. Not much could unsettle Kid or make him sad, but knowing his partner went through something like that did the trick, as well as reigniting his hatred towards the Marines.

🛠Sadly he had to ban {Name} from his workshop, due to the unexpected bumping and breaking of things with their wings.

Killer

🍜Found them absolutely beautiful upon first seeing them. Killer couldn't help himself from absentmindedly mumbling about them being an angel. Kid felt the need to mention the colour of their wings which Killer never minded. Still thinking they were stunning enough to be an angel.

🍜 Finds it very fascinating that they can fly and while being someone who is content on the seas. Killer does have some curiosity about being able to go into the sky as well, its unknown territory after all.

🍜 Can always tell exactly how his partner is feeling thanks to the wings. Especially when they're sad, their wings have a tendency to drag more and have a lack of usual response.

🍜Killer occasionally will touch their wings out of the blue, the feeling of appreciating just how pretty they are has never faded. Also likes how soft they are under his touch.

🍜 Killer was determined to hunt down anyone who was a part of experimenting on {Name}. While they never complain and often say they are thankful for their wings, Killer feels as if there is an underlying sadness in response to that memory.

🍜 One occasion when Killer was baking, {Name} wings accidentally burnt on the hot oven tray. He felt so bad looking at bunch of burnt feathers that he ended up giving the entire tray of baked treats as an apology.

Monkey D. Luffy

🍖 {Name} was pretty shocked when they were just flying and suddenly find someone with outstretched limbs wrapping around them and wrestling them down to the deck of the ship below. And being extremely disappointed that they were not edible.

🍖 Constantly hounding {Name} to take him with when they go flying. He finds it exhilarating and refreshing. If {Name} says no, Luffy will sulk and throw sad, pleading glances in their direction ever so often. Until he gets what he wants.

🍖 Luffy is constantly entertained by the way his partners wings seem to have a life of their own. Sometimes he will randomly poke them just to watch how they ruffle in response.

🍖 Finds it hilarious whenever {Name} gets a fright and their wings spread from the surprise, the force of which can knock down anyone and anything in the vicinity

🍖Never forced {Name} to talk about the fact they were once an experiment who lived in Dr. Vegapunk's lab. A name that even unsettles Luffy when he considers the fate of Kuma. He waited until they were ready to open up about it and explained the origin of their wings was due to experiments.

🍖 Absolutely loves snuggling into the soft feathers and can be found sneaking a few naps in by his partner.