#also blue is on the list because APPARENTLY she was described with them once (in bramblestar's storm apparently)

[twilightknight17]

Today on P5T, our wet-blanket adult companion continues to be kind of soggy. Also cake, a grand time in the Velvet Room, and my complete inability to pronounce one of our new skills!

……sir, stop doing that pose. That’s not your pose.

Anyway, apparently it’s fine to namedrop Shido and Yaldabaoth in the notes, but the Thieves are still not allowed to talk about them in actual dialogue. Fingers still crossed we get a Maruki note. Come on, Atlus, you cowards.

The Velvet Room’s forge is finally up and running, so it’s time to fuse some personas. It’s… a little strange, because now each persona has an inherent skill, and then can inherit ONE and ONLY ONE skill from its component personas. Which… kind of sucks, because there’s a lot of good skills. We’re using the sub-persona system from PQ2, but Erina’s not allowed to have one because she doesn’t have a core persona. Lavenza is basically like “something is suppressing the power of the Wild Card, but now everyone can use sub-personas.”

She’s having a grand time working the forge, though. We should let Lavenza have even more heavy equipment and machinery.

She also gives you a smartphone app that allows you to reach the Velvet Room from the battlefield, because sometimes there are multiple battles in a row before you can go back to the hideout. Which, hell yeah, but also, Atlus stealing Jade’s blue phones. Add another thing to the list. XD

(I’m joking, of course, but still. The list of things Atlus has “stolen” is like 15 things long by now. XDDD)

Cute icon, though. (It's so weird to see Lavenza the same height as Akira?)

So far the main difference between Zenkichi and Toshiro (other than the fact that one is primarily called by his first name) is that Toshiro flagrantly does not want to be here. They’re both kind of concerned about the Thieves –

– but Toshiro’s concern absolutely comes from a place of not wanting this, or like, any situations to be happening. He’s constantly wanting to rethink any of the plans that involve danger, he can’t fight, he’s always prepared to run away, and he’s just basically kind of… indecisive? Ryuji admits at least once that he has a good point about not charging in there, but he wants people to listen to him when he’s not really being helpful in the current situation.

He’s willing to listen to orders when it involves leaving, though.

(So does that mean Erina's the Thieves' age? I can’t tell how old anyone is. Toshiro is described as a young politician, so like… early thirties?)

...that works.

So we’ve retrieved Ryuji and Haru after a clash at the armory, which just leaves Makoto and Yusuke under Marie’s control. The scouts bring work that she’s finally making final preparations for her wedding, because she’s found the groom at last!

Place your bets: Is this Yusuke, Akira, or Toshiro? The Thieves think it’s Yusuke, and set off for the town square to rescue both him and Makoto from the terrible fate of marrying this crazy lady. They’re baking a massive cake in the square, and have put the captured rebels in it? This lady is kind of actually the worst, what the fuck.

It’s a trap, of course. Brainwashed Makoto and Yusuke show up, and announce with disgust that Lady Marie doesn’t want a penniless brat like Yusuke, she wants Toshiro! ...thank goodness. Because if she wanted Joker, I’d have even more questions about her mental state. We go bravely into battle to save our friends by capturing the flag, but after a long fight, when Erina charges to plant our banner in place of the destroyed one, she gets shot! There’s blood! And Toshiro definitely knows her at least subconsciously through his amnesia, because THIS is the thing that gets him to stop being a wet blanket, and sprint through a hail of gunfire to get to Erina.

Genuinely thought for a second he was going to get a persona right here. But no, he just makes sure Erina’s stable, snatches up the flag, and charges in to claim the victory.

Despite freeing all the Thieves, the battle has taken a lot out of everyone, and Marie shows up in person with a goddamn army. It’s a bleak situation, and Joker can offer to distract her so everyone can escape, but for once, he doesn’t have to. The other rebels charge so that the Thieves can get Toshiro and Erina to safety, and we all flee back to Leblanc to figure out what to do next.

That’s where I stopped for the evening, with everyone trying to recover from getting beaten half to hell. I’m assuming that now that we have a full company of Thieves, we’re going after Marie directly, so we’ll see how that goes! The battles seemed easy at first, but they’ve been getting more challenging, so I’m curious how a Major Boss Fight will go.

I got a fusion accident in the Velvet Room, and the forge blows up. It’s hilarious even if it means Lavenza got blasted. XD

Morgana has a tearful sprite when you have to leave the rebels behind, continuing the trend of great Morgana faces.

And, finally, one of the skills on Haru's skill tree is a combination of healing and ailment cure. Which makes sense, for the first-level spell, but the second one…

I don’t know what it is, but for some reason I have so much trouble saying that second one. I get it on a theoretical level, but actually saying it out loud is not working. XDDDDDDD I guess they combined these because they didn’t want more branches on the skill tree, but… ugh.

Diaramrita. Why. :’D

[nohiketoosmall]

Ranking Plush Wild Republic Rattlesnakes

Part 1: Ranking Plush Anacondas

Part 2: Ranking Plush Cobras

Part 3a: Ranking Plush Rattlesnakes

The photo limit for posting is 30 photos and Wild Republic was fully taking up 1/3 of the list so I moved the brand as a whole to their own post. Some listings are labeled as K&M International, which seems to be their former name.

I looked through my stuffed animals and I have one WR stuffed animal I could find, a giraffe from Lincoln Park Zoo's adopt an animal program I got for Xmas from my partner. Wild Republic partners with multiple organizations including the Audubon Society, which I talked about a little in my Anaconda post, and also the WAZA (World Association of Zoos and Aquariums), hence why you'll find their plushies in zoos.

Personally, their snakes are very hit-or-miss for me, although I should note they seem to have different price points so some are naturally higher quality than others. They've been around since 1979 but according to their own website boomed in popularity in 1999. Since then, they seem to have introduced and discontinued many stuffed animals, hence why they appear so many times on the ranking lists.

Super Jumbo Western Diamondback by Wild Republic (1)

113in

7/10 This rattlesnake is fine, but doesn't hold up next to Rambo IMO. There is also a 70in version on the WR website and I think they use the exact same fabric patterns, which is why the "jumbo" version has such small triangles. I couldn't find confirmation it has a rattle. IMO if I'm going to get a rattlesnake plush it should have a rattle, but I won't take off a point for that in the rankings because I don't think I'll be able to confirm that for most. But in my heart this is a 6/10.

Green Rock Rattlesnake by Wild Republic (2)

54in

8/10 Okay, I have to admit, I don't like the physical design of this snake very much. But I had to give it extra points for the audacity of including such a specific species of rattlesnake. I didn't know of this rattlesnake, but it is also called the banded rattlesnake and can come in a variety of colors including apparently gray, pink(ish), blue, and white. None of them are as vibrant as the green of this stuffed animal. They used this as an opportunity to make a blue version as well (this one listed at 70in):

On the topic of product descriptions, the Wild Republic website describes the green snake like this:

Long, lean, mean and green

I'm not a fan.

Green Rock Rattlesnake Toy by Wild Republic (3) via stuffedwithplushtoys

54in

2/10 I will give this snake props for... being unique, and having a rattle. But, seeing the fact this appears to no longer be sold on the Wild Republic website, I think its obvious why this was not successful. (At least stuffedwithplushtoys put nice facts about snakes in the product description)

his one seems to also have a blue type, although I only found this one picture:

Timber Rattlesnake by Wild Republic (4)

54in

7/10 I think that this uses the same sewing pattern as the other Wild Republic rattlesnakes. The website boldly proclaims this a "lifelike stuffed version" which I find extremely funny given they chose to make this snake bright magenta. But I found it so funny I ended up really liking her, she's iconic. In case you're wondering, real Timber Rattlesnakes are brown.

Twin Spotte Snake by Wild Republic (5)

70in

3/10 It doesn't look like this particular entry was proofread before being posted. The twin-spotted rattlesnake is indeed a species, and can be a kind of greyish blue. I don't rank this low because I dislike the bright blue- I just ranked the magenta timber rattler higher- I just don't like the pattern. Looking at the other WR rattlers, this one is so far off, it doesn't even look inspired by the twin-spotted? It looks like a burmese python pattern in blue. If you know the Deep History of my blog you know that I once had a dream featuring an electric blue burmese python, so we can only hope they use this fabric for a python in future posts.

I found a very similarly patterned snake that seems to be exclusive to Saint Louis Zoo, which I didn't fit into the other post because of length constraints, plus because it is so simimlar to the above plushie. The seller did not include any tags, although there don't seem to be any visible anyways, and the snake is not sold online. I assume it was custom ordered from one of the many plush companies I've been looking at in these posts, though.

Foilkins Rattlesnake by Wild Republic (6)

54in

7/10 This snake isn't really "my thing" but I have to admit, it is very cute regardless. It doesn't seem that huggable due to the material, but thats kind of the whole gimmick with the foilkins. I will accept that this one is not for me, but is good. I'm also gonna tuck this other foilkins rattlesnake in this section, it's clearly a rattlesnake but wasn't tagged as such:

Colorful Snake by Wild Republic (7)

54in

7/10 I thought I was finally free from Wild Republic when I found an e-bay listing showing the full body of this snake. It's listed as "Colorful snake" and not tagged rattlesnake on the WR site, and the fully body isn't visible so I'd written it off as a non-rattler. I guess this is very loosely a "horned rattlesnake" with a wacky pattern, but I'm ranking it highly because I think its a fun artistic direction.

Tribal Orange Snake by Wild Republic (8)

54in

0/10 I realized I had missed this one while looking through the "snakes" catalog. I'm ranking this one 0 because I'm not a fan of companies using the word "tribal" for any pattern, its just meaningless. Plus its just a little busy- I prefer the other colorful orange one.

2010 Purple Rattlesnake by Wild Republic (9) via ebay

50in

6/10 e-bay continues to taunt me by suggesting new Wild Republic Rattlesnake Plushes. I don't like this one very much and I wasn't sure if I should include it because its really just a snake with a rattlesnake tail, and because there are so many other WR plushies on this post, but it does look very soft. A different ebay seller seemed to have labeled this (or a very similar purple snake) as "Rainforest Cafe" so it may have been produced for them.

Patchwork Rattlesnake by Wild Republic (10) via ebay

70in

7/10 Like some of the others, I like this brightly colored one for its creative take on the patterns of a rattlesnake. This does mean fully 1/3 of this list is WR, but what can I say, they love rattlesnakes.

Blue Rock Rattlesnake by Wild Republic (11) via ebay

55in

4/10 I think this is meant to be a different version of the twin spotted rattlesnake, but this ebay listing was the only place I found this snake- they didn't even include a picture of the tag, so I can't confirm 100% this is WR, but it looks like their work. I just think the pattern and color choices on this one are kind of ugly. (The threads around the rattle are loose, hence why it has no detail).

Red Green Snake by Wild Republic

54in

8/10 This is the first unique shape and style from WR we've seen in a while! I like the face, its cute, and I like the creative patterns. The above photo is from ebay, but I did confirm that this snake is still sold on the WR website- the preview image on their site doesn't show the tail, and it's not tagged rattlesnake.

Plush Diamondback Rattlesnake by K&M International / Wild Republic via ebay

53in

4/10, this is a perfectly fine rattlesnake, although I don't like how the diamonds are not neatly centered. The most interesting thing about this one is the age- the ebay listing states this is from 1998, but not the manufacturer. The tag was very damaged but did say "1998 K", and as you may recalled K&M International did not rebrand to Wild Republic until 1999. I then found a listing with the same type with a better-looking tag, confirming the manu.

That's all the Wild Republic rattlesnakes so far! (not sponsored ofc, the other post has the other brands, again these just didn't fit!) Don't forget to read the post with the other rattlers!!

[johannwolfgangvongoethe]

Reading Umineko for fun and profit? hopefully?

multiple of my twitter mutuals love this game and talk about it all this time. and it looks really interesting, doesnt it, despite its incredibly intimidating length.

so, there is very little going in that i know about! and i am excited to experience it. :) (assuming i can fight my way through the whole thing) apparently they are all on an island. and someone dies. or something like that. if you are around people who love the game, it is inevitable to know some of the main characters, at least on a surface level. there is obviously beatrice, the woman in the painting, who my (similarily clueless friend) once called "the joker for trans women", which accurately describes her vibes. (i mean this in the most positive way. i am on the edge of my seat) otherwise i really only know battler because of his stupid name (its like hes a shonen protagonist - he has to BATTLE. FIGHT MAN) and the two girls who frequently get drawn alongside each other (the blond and the blue one) that aside, i had the vague mind to ask my friend for specific content warnings i usually look out for and they arent actually in there! even though my friend described the game as "well, in theory, umineko needs a bucket full of content warnings but if i were to list them like an encyclopedia, it would spoiler half of the thing" (great sign)

anyway, so i will write whatever thoughts i have about it. this absolutely will involve spoilers. the version i have is english and has newer sprites. (sort of sad, i actually genuinely think the original round boxxing glove artstyle has an incredible amount of personality to it and despite being wonky, the facial expressions are great)

intro + opening

kinzo in his musty dusty study talks to danjo, his doctor. despite them being friends, their relationship as a doctor and resisting patient is likened to a game of chess. and kinzo is obviously losing. i really like the analogy. his struggle with alcohol and health and his inability to improve his habits are direct moves against his friends medical advise. yet he is also framed as a very wealthy character, a king of sorts. so either way, whether he lives (the doctor convinces him) or dies (he succumbs to alcoholism), the king is lost. is this purposeful? who knows. really paints a picture of him though; there is nothing he wishes to write in his will, he needs no advise, he is actively destroying himself, and he wont leave any inheritance. so adding to his physical health, he really isnt doing well mentally, huh... makes me wonder How Much Of his sickness is related to drinking. it seems like something else is going on, too. him dying to alcoholism would paint a different picture than him being terminally ill and choosing to end his life this way (while still suffering from alcoholism but! you know). maybe then the lost king makes sense - he is lost either way, but he could still choose to make a few last good moves. also he made some sort of contract with beatrice and she has him wrapped around her pinky. well, we shall see.

this line specifically does not seem to bode well. beatrice what are you going to do to those people.

also i didnt watch the opening. my friend told me to watch this one instead :) good music

episode 1, part 1

battler has less dignity to him than i thought. idk what i expected. his name really is that stupid. he is a bit cringe but adorable nonetheless.

Both groups are at the top of my must-kill list. george is voiced by suzumura...

.

free space for those who know about my affliction of being a lavi d.gray-man fan. sometimes i can still hear his voice. his glasses do the scary anime villain thing. for now he is very nice, though i am fully expecting some bait and switch for his personality.

anyhow. some more notes:

does battlers upside down cross zipper mean anything??????? i like to imagine hes just a bit chuuni.

everyone in the family has that silly little emblem on their clothing

jessica is an instant fave for me personally bc of how she speaks

eva and natsuhi have some incredible beef going on in the back. love the toxicity going on here. both of them already seem like there is a lot to them, just from the first expressions

there is also some obvious conflict between the servants and the ushiromiya family and also... just between the servants, which is most visible in kanon

apropos. kanon transgender? eyebrow lift

so grandpa beat his kids and grandkids with his own fists and wooden sword. AND his hobby is dark magic. damn

the family is unwell, it seems

i have to strangle battler with my own two hands

the family introduction is very cute and they seem very lively and real, like an endearing bunch. battlers internal monologue is very on point for an 18yo. so sorry about whatever is going to happen. also are their weird western sounding names and the architectures of the guesthouse related to their patriachs obsession with beatrice? (points at her.... white woman.... i think) i wonder how the flight attendants knew how to pronounce all that. its funny to imagine the staff took little notes on it when they checked in.

knowing battler is a mamas boy is a very interesting little bit of info. "father issues damage you but mother issues rewrite your dna" or however that post goes. i absolutely believe in this. its horrifying. knowing battlers mother died and then he lived with his grandparents AND THEN THOSE DIED TOO. GIVE HIM A BREAK!!!! ..... wait this game is about mysterious murders isnt it. oh god.

we are informed there used to be a torii on the coastline of the island but it got destroyed by a lightning. ominous. maria also reacts to this. kumasawa wants to elaborate further on local myths but jessica stops her. there are also no seagulls (ah.... namedrop) to be seen anywhere. lets put a pin in all that for now. children with promonitions are a common trope after all.

now this is a bit of a personal thing but the fact they have a rose garden in full bloom on october is ridiculous. and youre trying to tell me they smell too, despite obviously being modern crossbreeds? get real.

welp. glass shatters. the clock strikes 12 o'clock. thats where im pausing the notes for now.

all that said, dont you think spending that much time talking about how much battler wants to touch his cousins boobs was strange :( dont you think

[elysianslove]

please use this ask to elaborate on mattsun’s dick <33

AH YES THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ASKING gotta do this before i start fasting lmfao.  this ended up being sadder than i thought, but it just ends up being kinda sweet and sorta hot. also this was way longer than i intended. post in reference.  

warnings; big dick mattsun, throwing up, pain kink (?), painful sex, insecurities, consensual taping  

okay remember when i mentioned the insecurity thing? let’s dive deeper into that; third years and mattsun are at some sleepover thing. it’s a little before graduation, and they don’t when they’ll see each other next, so they’re trying to make most of the time that’s left. the conversation progresses to sex, as it naturally does, and each of them admits some horrifying or embarrassing sex story. 

iwaizumi had sex with a girl who was extremely kinky and asked him to slap her, but— they don’t call him ace for no reason. 

oikawa lost his virginity to this girl and she started her period halfway through, but he was really young and didn’t realize that was something that could just happen? it wasn’t that he was immature about it. it was more that he fainted. 

hanamaki found out he was allergic to flavored condoms when he lost his virginity, and it was not fun. 

but then it was mattsun’s turn, and they’re all waiting for his embarrassing sex story, till he hits them with, “i’ve never had sex though,” and each and every one of their eyes bulge out of their heads. it’s the last thing they’d been expecting from him, from cool, suave, charming mattsun, but he continues to swear by it. and when they demand the reason — surely you’ve gotten the chance to before? — he admits it to them: “apparently my dick is too big.” and it’s comical to say out loud, because he’s only gotten with a handful of girls, barely any for it to be firm hypothesis. he thinks he’ll one day meet someone that doesn’t think it’s too big, it won’t fit, um i can give you a handjob, if that’s okay? 

all that evidently leads to a dick comparison, because how big can it really be? and once mattsun sees his best friends’ eyes widen at his hardened dick, it sinks in. shit, he really is big, isn’t he? 

“holy shit, mattsun,” makki says, and he’s bashful as he stares at his best friend’s dick. “how would that fit inside anyone?” and mattsun’s already growing soft, tucking his dick back in his pants and moving to wash his hands after kicking makki rightfully in the chest. 

college comes around, and he passes by a thousand girls crying about how the boy from last night’s dick was so small, ugh i wish i had an 8 inch, and the things i’d do to have my guts rearranged. he sees a little light in this tunnel of endless blue balling, and meets a girl, takes her back to his dorm with his lips biting at her neck and her hands fumbling with his belt. as soon as he falls onto the bed, as soon as she straddles him, naked, and moves to slip off his trousers, anxiety meets him halfway again, and he holds in a breath as she pulls at the hem of his pants and takes his boxers with her.

the gasp his half hardening cock pulls out of her is confusing. he can’t tell what to make out of it, but she spits on her palm and grips his hefty cock in her small palm, unable to have her fingertips meet. her eyes are wide, but she seems determined, even tilts her hips forward, but she resorts to, “can i just suck you off?” 

and mattsun thinks alright, that’s an upgrade. 

when she ends up throwing up because she underestimates his size and overestimates herself, mattsun offers her his bathroom to clean up, and grabs her a bottle of water as she leaves. 

he ends up losing his virginity to some masochist, and it’s not very memorable or anything he’d ever imagined it be. it sits high on his list of regrets: he cums way too early, and hurts the masochist too much for it to be enjoyable in any way. but he texts the old third year groupchat and types in “i lost my virginity 😎” and receives the praise he had expected. 

for months to come, he fucks his fist every other night to amateur porn and watches as some camgirls’ cunts swallow inches and inches of plastic cock. he hooks up with some girls only to have them sit on his face and kitten lick at the head of his cock. some swallow a little bit of his cock, some fondle at his balls, but none ever let him fuck them. oikawa sends him links for sex toys, and mattsun feels as pathetic as ever, but he buys a fleshlight anyways and finds purchase in how tight it feels around his cock, how wet and slippery it is, how it properly milks him dry. makki meets him during a break and offers to suck his dick for him, but mattsun flips him off and kicks at his stomach again. 

it’s during his third year that he meets you. 

you’re sweet and charming, , and you have pretty hair, and he likes your style, and you laugh at his stupid jokes. you call him handsome, and you call him pretty, and you compliment his hair when it’s at its curliest. you send him the weirdest memes and tell him it reminds you of him, and you pick him up at obscure times because you’re craving nuggets or ice cream or ramen or licorice. he asks you to be his girlfriend and when you say yes, he blushes so forcefully that he has to scrunch up his face to try and hide it. he lets you meet his friends through a screen, and he buys you matching rings because he enjoys the subtlety of it all, and he orders donuts to be sent to your place  during your exam week. 

being with you is a dream, so much that when he hovers above you, kissing at your lips like he always does and sucking at your neck the way you love, and you murmur that you want him, want all of him, his hands fumble and shake. he tries to hide it, but his breath is shakier and his chest is flushed, his eyes a little hazy. you’re so gentle with him, and he hadn’t known he needed it until you’re straddling him and slowly smoothing your hands down his chest, palming him through his too tight briefs, squeezing softly. 

when your hands reach for his briefs, his own snap to your wrist, and he dares to beg, “please stay,” and you kiss him in response. your breath hitches at the sight of him, and your hand shakes when you spit on it and grip at his cock, but despite your initial hesitance you don’t falter. 

you stroke tentatively at his cock, squeezing him tightly, and fall closer to him, hovering your lips by his as you ask of him, “stretch me— stretch me for you.” 

there’s only one word to describe everything mattsun had been feeling in that moment, and it’s overwhelmed, but it’s somehow in the most positive way. he sits up straight, keeping you on his lap. his fingers find your dripping cunt and he pushes one, two, three, four fingers inside of you. he makes you cum twice, fingers curled and rapidly thrusting into you, other hand occupied with your sloppy clit and mouth latched onto your nipple. you praise him and thank him and cry for him and writhe in his hold as he pleasures you, and when you’re breathless and limp in his arms, he waits for the ball to drop, for you to give into your anxiety and hesitance. 

except you don’t. 

you lift yourself up on trembling knees, hands settled on and gripping his shoulders, and with teary eyes, you say, no, you beg, “make it fit.” 

he has stars in his eyes as he grips his cock tightly with one hand, the other holding you to him by your waist. it’s slow, it’s painfully slow, but mattsun has never treasured time as much as in that moment. he takes in everything, from the way your body tenses at the first intrusion when his tip presses against your hole, to the small gasps and moans as you take more and more of him in, at the sweat that beads at your temple and that rolls between your breasts. he marvels at the heave of your chest and the roll of your tummy as you curve in yourself, and he revels in the press of your lips to his, in the pull your arms looping around his neck and pressing his chest flush to yours. 

he does cum too early, but you don’t chastise him. you only continue to ride his soft cock, his cum messily dribbling out, and he ignores the sting from his sensitivity in favor of rubbing at your clit, sending you over the edge eventually. 

he texts the old third years groupchat that night again, with you sleeping soundly by his side, comfortable beneath his blankets, “why didn’t you guys tell me sex was this good? fake friends,” and sends a picture of him shirtless, sweaty, and with a post-sex flush to his cheeks and messy curls, with the middle finger. 

maybe you shouldn’t have let him have a taste of you, because he fucks you in bed the next morning, sleep still settled deep in your bones, and then he fucks you in the shower, and then he eats you out splayed out on his dinner table. he videotapes you sucking him off, with your permission, and watches it when you’re too far out of reach. he sends you pictures after a shower, gripping his cock through the briefs he’d quickly slipped in, hair wet and curly and matted to his forehead, skin damp and glistening. and when you react so positively, he blushes, to his dismay. you meet his friends and they joke about how you’re still alive, but you brush them off and tell them you’ve never felt more satisfied. 

with every single time he watches his cock sink into your warm, tight, sloppy cunt, and every time he watches you swallow around him, and every time he makes you cry and leaves you braindead, leaves you mindless and begging for more, his confidence grows. so much until he learns to be cocky about it, so much that when he barely preps you and pushes into you, he shivers at the way you whine and tense up, at the way you flinch and lightly thrash. because you’re a good girl, aren’t you? always take my cock so well, don’t you? nobody but you, nobody like you. 

and it’s true; it’s nobody but you for him. in every single way.

hello what the fuck am i doing. i did not think this was gonna escalate like this hfskjfns but anyways, big dick mattsun for the win <3 

[foreverindreamlandd]

Bucky wanted to read her fanfictions and she always declined. So he begged and begged and begged... until she finally gives up and let him read one. 'Cause who could really say no to Bucky making puppy eyes?!

Let me know what you think about it

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Plus Size!Reader

WC: 1.5k (I am apparently incapable of writing a drabble)

A/N: Thank you again for another awesome request! I was basically cackling the whole time I wrote it. Want to read about how Bucky and this reader got together? Check out their origin story in my To Be Wanted series! Only warning in this one is the usual swearin’ like a sailor.

----

“See, this is why I always order Thai food. I can never do it justice.” You frown over your wok, mixing the noodles around with a wooden spoon hoping it will somehow make your creation taste better.

“I’m sure it tastes great, doll.” Bucky walks up next to you and grabs a noodle, tilting his head back as he drops it into his mouth.

His eye twitches almost imperceptibly and you groan.

“It’s good,” he coughs out, trying with all of his strength to regain his composure. “I think you just went a little too hard on the chili paste. I can feel my sinuses clearing up though, which is good, right?”

You roll your eyes. “Can you check the recipe on Pinterest again? I swear I put in the right amount.”

Bucky walks over and picks up your iPad. Right as he’s scrolling to find out if you should have used 2 tablespoons or 2 teaspoons of chili paste, a notification banner pops up and he accidently taps it, opening up your Tumblr app.

Omg! This fic is amazing! The way Bucky is there to support the reader. My heart completely melted! Your Bucky stories are amazing, Y/n! <3

Above the comment is a photo of him. It’s a shot from the news where he’s helping a civilian stand up after one of the attacks made by The Red Hand.

“Uh….love? What’s this?” He holds the iPad up to you and you shift your gaze over to him.

You drop the wooden spoon into the wok as all of the blood drains from your face. You’re frozen in place for a millisecond before you pounce on Bucky to grab the device from him. He’s never seen you move so quickly and it catches him off guard.

“Bucky give me the iPad right now,” you fling your arms toward it and he pulls it away, both amused and a bit concerned by your reaction.

“Wait, what is this? Is it something I should be worried about?”

You see a flicker of panic flash in his eyes and you stop flailing. You close your eyes and let out a deep sigh.

“No, I mean, I should be concerned because if you read that I’m probably going to combust and you’re going to dump me and run for the hills.” He furrows his brows in confusion and you slowly lift up your hand. “Can I please have that back before I have a mild panic attack?”

He stares at you, trying to gauge your emotions. All he can see is panic and sadness and it breaks his heart so he instantly gives in and hands you the iPad.

“Don’t worry about it, love. I trust you.” He leans forward to give you a chaste kiss.

You let out a pained groan against his lips and Bucky is once again confused.

“Ughhhh I hate hiding things from you.” You lock your iPad so the screen goes dark. “Okay, fine, I guess this conversation is happening. Remember when we first started dating and I, uh, mentioned I used to read and write stories about….us being a couple?”

Bucky nods, trying not to reveal any emotion to you that might make you spiral into a panic, and you continue.

“Well, that was one of those stories I wrote. I stopped looking on Tumblr basically as soon as I met you because it got all weird and meta and I got super uncomfy by the idea of reading fanfics - that’s what they’re called - about my new friend/now boyfriend Bucky Barnes. And then we started dating and I was all happy and shit and I totally forgot that those fics were still out there. Obviously I haven’t written any since then because that would be weird for...many, many reasons. Someone must have found an old one and commented on it. I’ll delete it. I’ll delete all of them. I swear. I’m so sorry, Bucky. I should have been more on top of this.”

Bucky stares at you, lips pursed and you grimace, afraid of the next words that are about to come out of his mouth.

This is so weird, Y/n. How could you do this?

No wonder you didn’t date anyone before me.

Obsessed much? (Okay, he probably wouldn’t say it like that but STILL).

No, what Bucky said next was much, much worse than what you could have imagined.

“Can I read one?”

Your mouth drops. Closes. Drops again. You blink rapidly.

“I’m sorry, I just hallucinated. What?”

Bucky points to your iPad, a sly grin forming on his face. “I want to read one of your stories.”

You take a step back from him, horror stricken as you pull the iPad closer to you as if you were protecting your collector’s edition of ‘Throne of Glass.’

“Absolutely not.”

Bucky steps forward and you step back. He chuckles. “Come onnn, doll. I want to know what your fantasies were about me before we got together.” He laughs harder as the look of horror on your face grows more manic.

“Bucky, I know you’re a super soldier and could probably punch me into the sun with your metal arm, but I promise I will fight to the death before I let you read one of these fics.”

You and Bucky continue this dance of him stepping forward and you stepping back until you feel your legs make contact with your couch and you fall back into a sitting position on its arm. Bucky uses this opportunity to tower over you, his arms resting on the couch so that you’re pinned between them.

Then, he pulls out the big guns.

His gaze softens, blue eyes shining into yours. His bottom lip puffs out and he gives you the most adorable, sexiest pout you’ve seen in your whole life.

“Please, love?” He says it with a slightly higher pitch, almost like a whine and it still sounds like honey to your ears. He even nudges your nose with his like a freaking sociopath.

Damn.

You close your eyes, let out a breath, then open them back up to him. “I hate you.”

His pout turns into a boyish grin and he gives you a quick kiss. “You love me.”

You groan. “Hopefully you still love me after this, Buck. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

You stand and open up your iPad, scrolling through your masterlist and finding what used to be one of your favorite fluff pieces. You begrudgingly hand it to Bucky and he sits on the couch.

Unable to sit still during this agonizing experience, you proceed to pace around your apartment like a crazy person and resort to cleaning the inside of your microwave which you haven’t done in a few months so it’s a good thing that Bucky is reading your fic so that you could get that out of the way. You probably won’t have a boyfriend in a few minutes but at least your microwave will be spotless.

You only steal a few glances at Bucky as he reads, mortified each time as you see his eyebrows move in every possible direction. Up, down, knit together, were they criss-crossed at one point?

Finally, after what feels like the longest ten minutes of your life, Bucky lets out a soft grunt, placing the iPad down on his lap. He looks up to you and you give him a weak smile.

“Alright, let me have it, Buck. Give me your worst. Be honest. Also, I love you.”

Bucky glances down at the iPad and then back at you.

“Well, I have a few questions.”

Your right eye twitches. “Hm?”

“Now that you’ve met me, do you still think my eyes are an all-consuming storm of blue?” You groan. He grins. “Or do you think my jawline was cut from marble created by the gods?”

This time, you breathe out a laugh and you walk over to sit on his lap. You take hold of his chin.

“Bucky, I don’t think I could ever come up with the right words to describe you. The real thing is quite literally a million times better than anything I’ve ever written.”

His eyebrows raise. “That is...probably the best compliment I’ve ever gotten in my whole damn life.” He leans forward and kisses you, and you sigh into the feeling of his mouth on yours, relief flooding through you.

You pull away, eyes skeptical. “So, you’re not thinking about how you can escape and never see my crazy ass again?”

“On the contrary, love, I’m thinking about how I can convince you to buy this gorgeous green dress you apparently wore as my wedding date. The one that showed off your cleavage in a way that made Bucky’s brain melt.”

The two of you burst out laughing and you lightly shove his chest. “Sure thing, Bucko. How about I work on the dress situation and you work on ordering us Thai food so that we don’t lose our taste buds from whatever the hell I just made.”

-----

Thank you for reading! Feel free to check out my other stuff here. :)

Taglist: @ceo-of-daichi @biiskuitx @forgetthisbull @eclipses-and-moondust @abcdefxkyou @jackiehollanderr @billionsofbeans @abitgryffindorky @lovelylostminds @mija-just-breathe @semlohkratz @bratty-longbottom-replies @carrotfantasimp @cremedelabrulee @ant1r3al1ty @th-e-mg@laura-moehrchen @emma-the-duck17 @sunnyjane4 @rosaline-black @parodsal000 @vicmc624 @abrunettefangirlnerd @officiallykuute @edityourwishingwell @mymindslabyrinth

***This was the original tag list for the To Be Wanted series. If you would like to be removed from the taglist for any other stories related to this series, feel free to DM me! And let me know if you would like to be *added* to the taglist for any other future stories featuring these two knuckleheads. :)

[love-takes-work]

Notes on SU Commentary Tracks

I watched the commentary tracks on the Complete Steven Universe DVD Set and I took some nerd notes.

The episodes with commentary tracks are “Reunited,” “Change Your Mind,” and “The Future.”

I’ll bold stuff that was maybe bigger news or more surprising for easier reading. And yes, some of this was already known from podcasts, other Q&As, or interviews, but I listed it if they said it again here.

Read on after the jump to read these and other highlights:

Steven’s original wedding speech

Older ideas on dialogue for Lapis when she came back to the beach

Scrapped concepts for the scene that ultimately included Steven communicating with the others in a mindscape

Discussions of earlier concepts for White Diamond having a power to “freeze” Gems into statues to make them perfect and having a gallery of them on Homeworld

Pink Pearl’s original fate

The translation of the writing on Obsidian’s sword

The origin of Pink Steven’s design

What Rebecca did to pitch the “SHE’S GONE” scene

Earlier plans to include Shep in “Change Your Mind”

An unused concept of how Steven feels about Biggs

The inspiration for the Heaven and Earth Beetles’ healed design

How Volleyball/Pink Pearl was almost a mini-villain

Discussion of how they did not get to share the origin of the Diamonds

Jasper’s scrapped participation in the movie

“Reunited” - 

Commentary with Rebecca Sugar, Ben Levin, Matt Burnett, Hilary Florido, Joe Johnston, Ian Jones-Quartey, and Kat Morris.

In 2015, an episode idea called “If You Love Yourself So Much” was discussed but rejected. It included some early ideas that ended up getting incorporated into “Reunited,” most notably Garnet marrying herself and putting rings on both hands.

The idea of the Cluster arm wrestling was planned for a long time. A scrapped idea of Steven banging his fist on a vending machine to get some Chaaaaps was supposed to visually parallel some of that scene, but it was axed.

When they got pushback on the wedding idea, they kept adding more and more “high entertainment value” items like a big musical number so the episode would be absolutely unmissable and appealing to everyone.

The song at the beginning of the episode was meant to check in with the entire cast and sort of remind you they exist and what their state of mind is going into the wedding.

Ian made a comment joking about “All 15 people in Beach City” being in the audience.

Just about everyone on the Crew touched this episode, despite that there are four main storyboarders credited for “Reunited.”

In 2016 Ian Jones-Quartey proposed marriage to Rebecca Sugar. They felt like the characters based on them (Sapphire and Ruby) HAD to get married in the show now because otherwise it wouldn’t be honest. But then their characters got married before they did.

They really love the idea of having characters get married who have known each other for a really long time, versus the fairy tale trope of movies ending with weddings between people who have met very recently.

Steven’s speech as officiator at the wedding used to be longer in its first draft--it was described as being weird and full of jokes, and there would have been a scene with Pearl getting weepy and pulling tissues out of her pearl.

Ian mentions loving a joke Jeff came up with having Greg play one chord to make Steven fall asleep--it’s sort of a “dream” chord you hear in cartoons a lot before a dream sequence.

The Crew discussed what it might be like if someone had never seen the show before and started with this episode.

Ian really wanted Steven’s psychic powers to figure into the episode.

Blue using a sadness wave to attack the Gems was a very old idea they’d planned for a long time. So was Lapis’s arrival.

There was a discussion of having Lisa Hannigan performing her lines as Blue VERY early in the morning.

Ian was happy the sword got broken because it was so momentous but it was just a sword. And later appeared on a shelf in the house as an artifact.

Miki had drawn a torn dress for Garnet at one point so she could be shown fighting and moving around more accurately, and this led to a long discussion of whether Gem clothing can even actually get torn the way human clothes can. They concluded that no, it shouldn’t be torn, so they backed up and gave Garnet an open-front dress from the beginning so the fighting version would make more sense.

Lapis originally might have had a longer speech upon arriving back on the beach. They eventually decided to just have her say “Hey.”

The barn falling on Blue Diamond was an intentional Wizard of Oz reference.

They point out that Steven even once said “drop the barn on the beach” (in a previous episode, “Can’t Go Back,” which was also a Miki episode).

Destroying the house was a big deal, and they always thought they’d end up doing it but backed away from it until “Reunited.” They almost even did it back in “Coach Steven”! But it just ended up with a little damage to the porch.

The Crew thinks Miki is really good at drawing ensemble shots.

Rebecca was always overwhelmed whenever she got to have Patti LuPone record for Yellow.

Originally the giant figures of everyone’s statue bodies in the mindscape were too dark and had to be revamped so they could be seen.

An earlier idea of Steven’s “psychic-ghost-situation” had him as a ghost actually trying to interact with the other characters during fighting action, but it was pulled back to this mindscape so there wouldn’t be as much confusing action to keep track of and more focus on what Steven was doing to encourage his teammates and contact the Diamonds.

Hilary was glad not to have to block out a fight.

Ian mentions loving having Bismuth back in the group.

They originally wanted the “Diamonds sensing Pink’s energy” plot to happen when Steven was in the palace somehow, but everything got moved to this scene--which the Crew all agrees turned out incredible, like how cool it was to have Steven essentially reminding each character why they fight and summing up their whole arc in a sentence.

“Change Your Mind”

Commentary with Rebecca Sugar, Ben Levin, Matt Burnett, Hilary Florido, Joe Johnston, Ian Jones-Quartey, and Kat Morris.

They like to refer to this episode as “The movie before the movie.”

They loved incorporating “princess tropes” into Steven’s time on Homeworld, which is why there were so many references to “mice” (well, Pebbles) making clothes, being locked in a tower, being reminded of his manners, loving animals and freeing imprisoned pets, etc. 

Deedee did the voice of the rainbow worm pet. She apparently didn’t find it memorable and was surprised when she was reminded she did the voice.

Rebecca was super excited for the confrontation with Blue.

There was some discussion of how Steven would have died of starvation if he didn’t have someone practical like Connie to remember to bring food.

They love working with the huge scale the Diamonds present.

The Crew always wanted to put someone in Blue’s hair loop. Originally they wanted Blue to tuck Greg in there when she kidnapped him, but they didn’t end up being able to do any hair-loop-carrying until this episode.

The Crew bantered back and forth about what the heck those Pebbles’ names were and how hard it was to track them.

They agreed that Paul draws the best Yellow Diamond, which makes sense since he also drew the first episode with Yellow (and her stink face). 

The scene where Yellow asks Blue to stop using her powers on her and then realizing she’s crying on her own was one of Rebecca’s favorite scenes to get to finally.

Steven Sugar thought Gems would spend a lot of time in their own chambers/rooms just not really doing much of anything unless they had to fulfill their purpose.

Some of the Homeworld ideas were based on a Soviet artist’s concepts, Boris Artzybasheff, and also many ideas were inspired by Busby Berkeley regarding how people were objects and furniture.

The mech was an old idea. Once they had the hand ship from “Jailbreak,” they knew there had to be bodies somewhere.

They focused a lot about what could be the coolest and funniest way for something to happen. The concept of the yellow and blue spaceship arms appearing out of the sky to smack the White Diamond mech around was one of those.

Rebecca really wanted things to look more and more cartoony and bizarre as you get deeper into Homeworld.

They spent a very long time trying to decide on characters’ new outfits.

The trash can lid is said to be a reference to “a flying bear cartoon” and they dance around speaking a direct reference because they’re not sure they’re allowed to say its name.

In discussing the powers of the Diamonds, there were debates on what White’s power would be; with Yellow being physicality-based and Blue being emotion-based, they thought White as identity-based made the most sense.

Different ways to express this were played with before settling on the idea that she thinks she’s perfect and others’ colors make them less like her and less perfect. But then she becomes a hostage to her own beliefs about herself because if she does anything that reflects on everyone else, so it’s best to do nothing.

They had some cool earlier ideas of White’s powers making statues out of other Gems and having a gallery full of frozen Gems, frozen by White to make them perfect.

They also weren’t sure what fate befell the original Pink Pearl and discussed whether she might have been destroyed. 

Rebecca discussed how creepy it was to have White Pearl speaking in Christine’s voice and not Deedee’s--that we should find it fundamentally disturbing at this point.

Tom Herpich came up with the crack on White Pearl’s face.

In real life, pink diamonds aren’t understood as well as yellows and blues. It’s more known what makes a diamond yellow or blue, and some of those facts Rebecca researched were originally woven into the speech White gave about their “impurities.” But it turned out to be too dry and most of it got cut.

Rebecca loves having Lapis with pants and sandals for easier cosplay.

Ian had to draw the scene where Steven is falling and fusing with inert characters--he wasn’t able to properly explain it to Rebecca so she had him draw it.

They really wanted Rainbow Quartz 2.0 to have a scarf, but they couldn’t figure out how to get that into Pearl’s design. They miss the scarf.

It was really important to have these Fusions display call-forwards of the Gems’ new outfits which we hadn’t yet seen.

Rebecca points out that Sunstone’s design breaks a design rule and she feels like Sunstone should have Garnet’s pant leg colors on their legs, but at the same time she understands the rule of cool and likes it like this.

It’s discussed how none of Steven’s fusion weapons are exclusively offensive weapons either.

Rebecca still really wants a suction cup Sunstone toy.

Sunstone’s ability to transcend reality and break the fourth wall was a joke that exploded in the discussion room among the Crew. As soon as the idea was pitched everyone kept coming up with ideas. Sardonyx’s fourth-wall-breaking is more snarky, but Sunstone’s is helpful.

Rebecca was disappointed that the rule about Steven’s clothes wasn’t always followed with having his clothes appear on Obsidian’s hand, but she was delighted that you could see them in one scene.

They spent a lot of discussion time on making sure Steven-Obsidian was different somehow from Rose-Obsidian. The hair is different.

Old versions of Obsidian were drawn with wrapped-together Twizzlers legs, which sort of is reflected in the present design.

The sword had been planned forever--and it first appeared in “Bubble Buddies.”

Miki worked on the Ninja Turtles show so Rebecca was really excited to see her depictions of Bismuth and Sunstone.

An early plan to have Obsidian draw the sword from their mouth was complicated because fusion weapons should be combinations, so they finally reached the solution of having them combine to make the hilt, then get the blade out of Obsidian’s mouth.

The blade of the sword is thought to say “We’ll always save the day,” but you’d have to ask Steven Sugar.

Another really old idea was climbing into the White Diamond mech eye.

Rebecca was disappointed that some of the merch made of White Diamond did not feature her cape sparkles.

There were many debates early on about where Rose might “actually” be. There were tons of references to this fundamental question throughout the show--introducing Lapis as a Gem trapped in an object, having Pearl ponder pulling Steven’s Gem out as a baby, straight-up wondering what would happen to him in “Bubbled” when Eyeball was trying to take his Gem, etc. They all decided Rose was definitely gone but that the idea of her possibly being inside him should be on his mind a lot, leading to disturbing images like dreaming about coughing up her hair.

Yellow Diamond and Blue Diamond both challenged Steven about things he was very confident about, but White’s question of his identity got to him because he in fact is not confident about that.

The black and white eeriness of the fuzzy background and the other characters having their colors washed out helped make the scene in White Diamond’s head so disturbing and creepy.

The split screen showing Steven’s two perspectives was exciting to Rebecca, and was a pretty old idea. And she points out it sort of “breaks the show.”

The Gem Steven, Pink Steven, was represented by a slightly modified version of his model sheet. Everyone laughed when they saw what was getting used.

They decided that an earlier idea of Pink Steven looking angry should be replaced by an emotionless version of him. All the emotion should be with Organic Steven.

In the pitch meeting for this episode, Rebecca herself screamed “SHE’S GONE!!” and shocked the hell out of everyone. She pointed out how no one expected this of her because she’s pretty quiet, but she just wanted to shock everyone the way Steven would in the show.

They point out this is the first appearance of the geometric shield that got so much use in Future.

The fact that Steven is Steven is the ultimate reveal of the show. Usually in fantasy shows there’s some other kind of revelation, but Steven just being amazingly human and amazingly Gem and amazingly himself is wonderful here.

They like having the pilot reference with “What’s your excuse?”

If Rose had somehow still been alive in him, all of this would have been cheapened.

Ian loves that you can faintly hear Sadie’s concert from way out in space as the camera approaches Earth.

They got a lot more use out of the Beach-A-Palooza stage than they thought they would when it had to be designed for “Steven and the Stevens.” There was a joke about how at one of the conventions a real Beach-A-Palooza stage was constructed and they had a thought about how oh good, it’s getting reused.

Sadie having green hair in the finale was a late change but they liked showing her progression. 

They had originally kicked around the idea of Sadie already having her new partner Shep at this point, but decided to develop that in Future instead.

They compare White Diamond’s stepping gingerly into the fountain to skeptically getting into a public pool.

Some silliness they didn’t get to use was that Biggs would be “beloved by everyone” except Steven. They never got to cover it, but originally Steven was just going to not really understand why everyone loves her so much and doesn’t personally much care for her.

The Heaven and Earth Beetles are based on the Mothra Ladies.

The healed Gems’ horns are supposed to be side effects of the corruption that they continue to bear in the present.

Larimar and Orange Spodumene ended up different in the ending scene than they became in Future. Many of the designs were retroactively pulled into this scene after being designed for the movie.

Rebecca wrote “Change Your Mind” as a personal song to express her feelings surrounding her fight for the wedding.

“The Future”

Commentary with Rebecca Sugar, Kat Morris, Alonso Ramirez Ramos, Hilary Florido, Joe Johnston, and Ian Jones-Quartey.

The animatic for this episode ran SO long--they’re supposed to be just over 11 minutes but this one was 17 minutes.

Steven’s calisthenics routine, a callback to “Future Vision,” was on the chopping block to make the episode shorter but Rebecca wouldn’t allow it to be cut because she wanted to show that Steven’s been taking care of himself.

They were very excited to get a chance to cover some of the things in Future that they couldn’t squeeze into the original show, like the unbubbled Rose Quartzes, Volleyball, etc.

The new writers on the show also helped bring forward the idea of Steven finally making some of his OWN mistakes to fix.

This also helped construct the idea of Steven essentially being the “final boss” of his own battle.

Usually stories that involve someone being in a fight and winning don’t explore the effect just being in a fight has on a person, regardless of whether you won. 

Rebecca really wanted to play Ocarina of Time after beating it so she could go back to all the places and see how people were doing. She wanted this epilogue series to explore that a little too.

Little Homeschool is sort of a Tiny Toons reference--older cartoons teach younger cartoons how to be cartoons, and this is Gems teaching other Gems how to be Gems on Earth. 

Lamar came up with the silly joke about receiving that art set with all the different media types in it--the one artists are always getting from a well-meaning relative at holiday time.

A scrapped plot idea involved Volleyball/Pink Pearl as a sort of “mini-villain,” with a focus on her activating the un-activated Pearls.

There’s discussion of how victimization turns people into villains sometimes. But since showing that happening with Volleyball wouldn’t have served the interests of Steven’s arc, they couldn’t fit it in.

There was also a “very specific” Gem origin and Diamond origin story that’s quasi-religious in nature--it’s very cool and complicated. But they do not tell us what it is.

Ian and Joe both really wanted to have Jasper living alone in the woods and stacking rocks. They’re glad they got this series to do that with her.

There was originally an idea for a B-plot involving Jasper in the movie. They don’t discuss the specifics.

There were many ideas they didn’t get to work on because they would have started new arcs and Future was not about kicking new plots into gear.

“Mr. Universe” was the last episode they wrote/finished.

Miki really wanted to include a kiss between Connie and Steven to show their relationship was okay. Among the Crew everyone knew their relationship was basically eternal but Miki wanted to make sure WE knew that.

Steven driving conveyed momentum for Future; in the original show, we always came back to the laundry hand, back to home, but in Future that’s changed and home isn’t what it was. 

They were really excited that a gourd family made it to the crowd scene in Future.

Thanks for reading!

Note: The movie had some commentary tracks too, but the one on this DVD set is the same as the one released on the original standalone movie DVD, so I did not outline it here. Here is my post about the DVD commentary from the movie.

[hottpinkpenguin]

This Side of Paradise - Chapter III

Part of the Druig x Elena AU (see full AU list here)

Characters: Healer!OC (Galen), Fem!OC (Elena), Druig, Makkari

Summary: Druig finds himself connected to Sokovia following the Battle of Sokovia (Avengers: Age of Ultron) by a need to find something... or someone.

Warnings: Mature themes of death, loss & grief; depictions of protests and civil unrest; angst; fluff; (mild) depictions of childbirth

Read Chapter I here Read Chapter II here Read Chapter IV here

AU is thanks to mastermind @bellejeanx ♥

“How’d you know?”

The question had been sitting on the edge of Elena’s tongue for most of dinner. Druig and Makkari sat across from her, the dim lights of the restaurant casting their faces in shadow. Druig looked up from his plate at Elena, confused.

“Know what?” he replied.

“That I’m pregnant.” There were a lot of odd things that had happened since she’d met Druig and Makkari earlier that day, but for some reason Elena couldn’t move past Druig’s knowledge of her pregnancy.

He returned her gaze with a studied, passive expression, but Elena saw a flicker of worry in his eyes. She also noted Makkari shoot Druig the smallest of loaded glances. Elena sensed the two were about to hedge, as they’d been doing with most of her probing questions about them so far.

“You told Makkari, in the forest earlier that I was pregnant. How did you know that?” she pressed.

Druig sat back, placing his utensils down on his plate. His eyes drilled into Elena, as if he were searching her mind for her intention. Elena thought for a moment his irises would turn golden again, as they had in the park. Druig had staunchly denied that that had happened, insisting that Elena must have been disoriented and had some sort of acute mental breakdown because of her grief mixed with the stress of the riot. The story didn’t convince Elena in the slightest, and she knew that Druig and Makkari knew it.

After a few moments of silence, the only sounds coming from the patrons around them, Druig shrugged nonchalantly, returning to his steak. “You’re showing,” he replied casually.

Elena shook her head, eyes narrowing.

“I’m barely showing. There’s no way someone who hasn’t seen me before would know that just by looking at me.”

Once more, Makkari and Druig maintained passive expressions, but their silence was thickening. Elena decided to press her advantage.

“You were in my mind earlier, in the park. I know what I saw. Your eyes turned gold and I…” She faltered slightly, at a loss for words on how to describe the sensation. Passed out? Fell asleep?

“… I left,” she concluded anticlimactically. A small flush spread over her cheeks as she realized how foolish it sounded out loud.

Druig laughed, and the strain with which he tried to make it sound unbothered was apparent.

“Elena, we told you, you just-”

He stopped mid-sentence when Makkari gently grabbed his wrist. He looked up at her curiously. She shook her head gently at him, then inclined her chin towards Elena. Elena watched as Makkari signed something to Druig. Having no experience with sign language, Elena couldn’t decipher the nature of the conversation that proceeded to unfold between the two, but she could tell that they were discussing something rather serious. It didn’t feel contentious, as their argument earlier in the park had been, but Elena could see that Druig was fearful of something.

After a few minutes watching her two newfound companions deep in conversation, Druig sighed in defeat and turned back to Elena.

“Makkari said I should be honest with you,” he informed her. Elena saw that same flicker of anxiety dance through his striking blue eyes, and he started chewing on his lip. Elena nodded encouragingly.

“I’d like that,” she told him matter-of-factly, taking a sip of water and holding his gaze.

“There’s a lot to explain,” Druig started falteringly, leaning back from the table and slipping his hands into his jacket pockets. Elena saw him begin to fidget with something in the right pocket in an automatic gesture. His brow furrowed and his eyes darted across Elena’s face, gauging her reaction carefully. This time it was Elena who tried to keep her facial expression calm and neutral.

“I’m a good listener,” she replied simply, hoping he couldn’t detect the edge of hope in her voice. She knew that there was something unusual about Druig and Makkari, and she hoped that whatever Druig planned on explaining would answer that question for her.

With a deep inhale, Druig eventually leaned forward, placing his elbows on the table, bringing his face close to Elena’s and his eyes level with hers. Elena felt her stomach somersault a bit as she realized she could feel his breath ever so slightly on her cheek. She bit back the surge of shame she felt at realizing she was attracted to another man so shortly after losing Galen. There’ll be time to deal with that later, she thought to herself, stifling the guilt down.

“You’re right, I was inside your mind earlier,” Druig agreed. Elena let out a sigh of relief, happy to have her instincts confirmed. She nodded.

“So you’re a superhero who can read people’s minds?” she asked for clarification, taking another sip of water if only to break the intense eye contact making her heart flutter. Her guilt stung in her chest, and she battled against it.

“Not exactly,” Druig replied, laughing softly. Makkari too seemed amused by this, letting a knowing smile dance across her lips.

“Not many people can read minds,” Elena retorted. Druig nodded in agreement.

“True,” he conceded. “I don’t fall into the ‘people’ category, though.” This last statement hung in the air, and Elena could see Druig waiting expectantly for her to react. Elena considered the statement and its implications, but she found herself neither particularly surprised nor disturbed by it. After another sip of water, she shrugged as she busied herself with cutting off a piece of chicken breast.

“Robot?” she asked cheekily after a moment, earning another laugh from Druig and smirk from Makkari. He shook his head, his entertained expression inviting more banter. Elena obliged.

“Alien?” Another denial. Elena racked her brain, trying to think of other options.

“Angel,” she stated without question. This one earned a guffaw from Druig.

“As flattering as that is, wrong again,” he replied. His smile was heart-stopping, his accent velvety. The guilt stabbed at her, acidic and condemning. Elena leaned back from him subtly.

“I give up,” she admitted.

Druig looked at Makkari, raising an eyebrow at her as if wanting to confirm her agreement to the plan. Makkari nodded meaningfully at him, motioning to Elena again.

“We’re Eternals,” Druig said, turning back to Elena, his voice low and serious. Once again, his blue eyes scanned Elena’s face, searching for some hint as to her inner monologue.

Elena ran her tongue over her teeth in contemplation.

“What is that, like Avengers from space?”

Another beguiling chuckle from the handsome Irish mind reader.

“More or less,” he acquiesced. Elena was worried she’d have to continue playing twenty questions with him to get any further information, but thankfully Druig continued to speak.

“We came to Earth with eight others, like us, thousands of years ago. We’ve been protecting humanity from Deviants.”

Elena raised an eyebrow.

“You came to Earth? From where?”

“Our home planet is called Olympia,” Druig informed her, earning a soft glassy-eyed smile from Makkari. Elena thought she could see memories of Olympia scrolling past Makkari’s eyes.

“Thousands of years ago?” Elena asked again, somewhat skeptically. Druig and Makkari nodded in unison.

“When we got here, humanity was brand new,” Druig informed her. Elena’s mind scattered in a million directions grasping at questions. She tried to stay focused.

“I take it you don’t age or die,” she stated, gesturing to her two dinner guests. Conversation lapsed briefly as the waitress came by to whisk away their cleaned plates and refill their water glasses. Elena noticed the waitress shot Druig a flirty smile as she left, and Elena felt her vanity flare its nostrils in indignation.

“We don’t age,” Druig said once the waitress was out of earshot. “We can be killed. Takes a lot more to kill one of us than it does one of you, though.” Elena couldn’t be sure why, but she prickled defensively at his statement.

“I see,” she replied coldly, her reaction somewhat mystifying.

Makkari reached across the table, laying her hand over Elena’s. Her fingers were long and slender and decorated with rings. She squeezed Elena’s hand gently and looked at her with kindness. She signed something at Elena, her eyes never breaking their warm gaze at Elena.

“Makkari said she’s sorry for your loss,” Druig translated. “Me too. I’m sorry, that is,” he added hastily. He dropped his gaze from Elena’s.

Elena smiled appreciatively back at Makkari. She realized Makkari had known Elena’s feelings before she’d known them herself. She’d bristled at Druig’s comment because of Galen. As was becoming increasingly common, Elena felt her heart sink into her stomach at the reminder of his absence. The guilt she’d been struggling to tamp down took advantage of her solemnity. Embarrassed, Elena swiped the tears in her eyes, looking down at the table. Her frustration with herself only made it worse, and soon she felt tears streaming down her face again.

“He worked at the hospital,” Elena said in a quiet voice, giving up on wiping away her tears, letting them stain her cheeks and drip off her chin.

She felt Druig and Makkari tense across the table as they looked at her with concern.

“He was my best friend,” Elena continued, the words starting to spill out of her mouth. “We grew up together. Didn’t get together until I was in university, but he’d always been there. He was such a natural healer, from the time he was a little boy.” Elena hesitated, considering telling Druig and Makkari about Galen’s powers. She and Galen had never discussed them specifically, but Elena knew him well enough to know that he had a certain gift. Nothing like being immortal like the two beings sitting across from her, and maybe not enough to qualify as an Avengers-level hero. But it was a gift nonetheless, and she had loved him for it.

“He’s your child’s father?” Druig asked. Elena looked up at him, somewhat taken aback by the intimacy of the question. His blue eyes were saturated with sympathy, and Elena had to resist the urge to reach across the table and touch him. Stifling the impulse, she nodded.

“We named her Lyla,” she said, feeling her voice grow in strength as she said her daughter’s name aloud for the first time in months. Aside from Galen’s parents, no one knew Elena was pregnant. She was in distant and irregular contact with her own parents after having a long anticipated falling out over her decision to go back to graduate school rather than return home and take over the family business. Her friends felt a lifetime away, and although Elena felt a burn of shame over letting her friendships wither, she knew that she’d barely been able to take care of herself since losing Galen, let alone invest in friendships.

Another hand reached across the table, but unlike Makkari’s this one was rougher and strong. Druig took Elena’s hand in his with the same gentleness as earlier that day when he’d helped her up in the woods. Elena felt herself interlace her fingers with his.

“Lyla is a beautiful name,” he told her, his voice choked with an emotion Elena couldn’t quite decipher. She felt the same powerful urge to reach up and stroke his cheek. Her hand began to move, almost of its own accord, until the waitress’ irritatingly perky voice interrupted the moment.

“I’ve got your check here, unless there’s anything else I can get any of you.” Her come-on was in no way subtle, and she shot Druig a sultry glance through her lashes. Elena gritted her teeth and hurriedly retracted her hand from Druig’s grasp, swatting away the remaining tears drying on her cheeks.

“Check is fine,” he replied dismissively, never moving his eyes from Elena’s. The waitress smacked the paper slip on the table and turned on her heel, stung by the blunt rejection. Elena couldn’t help but preen slightly under the knowledge that, for whatever reason, she held Druig’s full attention.

After the bill was paid (50/50, following much stubborn insistence on Elena’s part), they stood up to leave. It had grown dark outside, and Elena began to wonder whether this would be goodbye. She realized that there hadn’t been any discussion over why this unusual company of three had formed, and when it would be time to part ways. Elena couldn’t imagine any reason for Druig or Makkari to tie themselves to her any longer; she felt certain that there must be pressing cosmic matters drawing their attention away. Resigned to her own irrelevancy, Elena felt her heart sink at the thought of parting ways with her two interesting companions.

Before she had much chance to dwell, Druig darted over to Elena’s side of the table to help her with her jacket, his attention growing more solicitous by the minute. Elena felt her face flush as his fingers grazed the back of her neck as he pulled the collar of her jacket over her shoulders.

After trading out the warmth and conviviality of the restaurant for the quiet, cold street outside, Elena stalled just outside the restaurant doors, expecting Druig and Makkari to make their excuses and part ways. Interestingly, she noticed that both of them stopped too, looking back to her as if waiting for instructions.

“I suppose this is goodbye, then,” Elena ventured, hoping that the disappointment wasn’t too apparent in her voice.

Makkari signed something at Druig, who replied. Just as earlier at dinner, there was an obvious debate happening, but not one of animosity. Elena watched patiently. She wished she could understand what Makkari was signing; some gut instinct told her that Makkari was on her side, whatever side that was.

After a few minutes, Druig turned to Elena. Connecting with his gaze sent a small shiver down her spine. Elena felt so conflicted and emotionally exhausted as to almost be numb to the shame that surged through her body immediately afterwards. Damn it all, she cursed to herself, wishing she would stop lusting after this perfect stranger. She groaned internally at the coming emotional turmoil this would create for her once she had a chance to be alone with her thoughts.

“Is it alright if I walk you home?” The innocence and awkwardness with which Druig posed the question reminded Elena of a lovestruck teenager, not at all a centuries-old half-immortal demi-god who could read minds. It caught Elena flat-footed, and for one terrifying moment she considered the possibility that he was cruelly teasing her.

The sincerity in his eyes, and the nervous shuffle of his feet said otherwise. Against all odds, Elena pondered the idea that she made him nervous. Without meaning to, she let out a chuckle at the idea. As soon as it slipped out of her mouth, she knew it had been the wrong reaction. Druig recoiled instantly, his lip curling up in a resentful sneer.

“Oh, Druig, wait, I’m sorry, that’s not what I meant,” Elena blustered, stepping towards him, her hand connecting with his forearm automatically. She didn’t stop until she was mere inches from him and then froze, the intimacy of the moment temporarily shocking her system. She felt his breath fan over her face and his expression soften as his body almost imperceptibly inched closer to hers. The urge to touch him returned with a vengeance, as did the shame. Elena felt her cheeks blaze with a mix of desire and remorse. After a few tantalizing moments of closeness, she cleared her throat modestly and stepped back, trying to regain control of her senses.

“Yes, please, a walk home would be lovely,” she finally uttered. Without a backwards glance - and rather rudely, she realized as she was halfway down the block - she took off in the direction of Galen’s apartment. She heard Druig’s footsteps behind her, quickening until he was in stride with her and then slowly to match her pace. His hands were back in his jacket pockets, and Elena noticed he was chewing his lip. She was beginning to detect that, even though he wasn’t mortal, he had developed that thoroughly human tick of chewing his lip when nervous. She smiled privately to herself at the idea that she could be the reason for that.

They walked most of the way in a comfortable silence, despite the tension of the moments prior. Elena felt the effects of a chaotic day and emotional anarchy catch up with her, an intense fatigue settling in her body and a melancholy mood misting in her mind. The street was extremely quiet; many of the buildings in this part of the city were either abandoned due to concerns over structural integrity or half collapsed. A few pedestrians walked past the couple, paying no second mind to Druig and Elena, their minds and feet intent on their own destinations. Elena let her eyes roam over the sights of half-empty Sokovia, until she was struck by a realization.

“You never answered me,” she said, turning to Druig and stopping. He stopped too, although he didn’t seem surprised by her question. A hint of a smirk twitched at one corner of his mouth. He cocked an eyebrow up at Elena as if testing her interest in the answer she sought. She returned his gaze steadily. Although she had been content to engage in playful banter earlier in the day and at dinner, her tiredness was making her more impatient and thoughtful than usual.

“When I was in your mind, earlier at the park, I felt your daughter,” Druig eventually admitted, gesturing to Elena’s belly with a hand still tucked in his jacket pocket. Reflexively, Elena’s hand came to rest over her lower belly, her fingers fanning out protectively over the life growing there. With a growing sense of wonder, Elena smiled at the revelation Druig had just let slip. He caught her smile and the unspoken realization behind it. He waited patiently, knowing Elena would eventually tell him.

Elena looked up at him, her eyes misty with emotion, a wondrous smile illuminating her delicate features. Druig felt his own heart skip a beat at the sight.

“Galen knew it would be a girl,” she finally said breathily, a torrent of memories flooding back to her. Her last conversation with Galen had been about naming their daughter - at that point no more than six weeks old - and he had insisted that he had a feeling it was a baby girl. Elena smiled, a warm feeling emanating from her chest. She relaxed into the feeling, one she hadn’t felt in a long time, and one that she had worried might never revisit her. It was love. Love for Galen, love for their daughter Lyla. The promise of future love.

Druig nodded knowingly at Elena, his eyes drinking in her obvious joy as she danced with her own memories in her mind. “He was a wise man,” Druig eventually said. Happily, they continued their walk back to Elena’s apartment, a newfound sense of hope blooming in Elena’s chest…

[une-nuit-pour-se-souvenir]

random thoughts about aegon vi and septa lemore

Apparently, it’s Aegon’s week. i don’t think i ever paticipated in these events for any character or pairing, but @agentrouka-blog​’s theory that septa Lemore is Ashara Dayne and that the baby switch was between Aegon and her rumoured child (instead of random kid) showed up on my dash today.

Lemore being Ashara Dayne and there having been baby switch like theorised would be fantastic, because she’d know a lot of stuff that is otherwise impossible to know. She knows who dishonoured her at Harrenhal (we all know Brandon, not Ned). She knows about Wylla, a wetnurse from the Dayne Household, who Eddard Stark and Edric Dayne both say is Jon’s mother (we all know Jon is Lyanna’s, so this apparent lie version being told by two different people who have nothing to do with one another seems to suggest a combined lie between Ned and the Daynes). She knows about Jon because Ned went to Starfall with him and (if baby switch theory is true), she can confirm Aegon VI is real.

There’s also the suspicious narrative choice of a “Targ” (not even, she has dark hair, not silver hair, even if she has purple eyes) getting with an impetuous Stark at Harrenhal and a secret child never really going anywhere. What’s the point of that besides shading Rhaegar plus Lyanna equals Jon? This I always thought was suspicious, but this theory would *poof* make it make sense.

TYRION III ~ ADWD

This is the chapter where Aegon VI Targaryen is first introduced. The whole chapter is like a “perigrination” to find him. I am of the opinion that Aegon VI is the real thing for a long time now and there’s evidence that might be the case in this very chapter where he’s introduced.

"How fares our lad?" asked Illyrio as the chests were being secured. Tyrion counted six, oaken chests with iron hasps. Duck shifted them easily enough, hoisting them on one shoulder.

This is shortly after the chapter starts. Not only Illyrio asks about Aegon, there’s also the imagery of six chests about. If Aegon is crowned king of Westeros, he’ll be Aegon VI Targaryen.

By imagery, Aegon is real.++

"There is a gift for the boy in one of the chests. Some candied ginger. He was always fond of it." Illyrio sounded oddly sad.

This is often used as a clue that Aegon VI is fake. Illyrio is expressing some sentimental attachment, so there are theories that he could be the father and the mother would be some Valyrian looking wife he has. it has its merits.

On the other hand, Aegon VI is on the run from the crown, hiding under a false identity and dyes his hair another colour, but most importantly in this passage, is Aegon’s fond of a specific sweet that what we would at first mistake for a father for the reasons pointed above gifts him with.

This is 1:1 what’s going on with Sansa, she’s on the run from the crown, hiding under a false identity and dyes her hair another colour, she’s fond of a specific sweet (lemoncakes) and Littlefinger, who’s pretending to be her father and is very... emotionally invested... in her, gifts her with some (well, in parternship with her cousin, but the cousin is another matter).

By parallel, Aegon is real.++

Tyrion craned his head to one side, and saw a boy standing on the roof of a low wooden building, waving a wide-brimmed straw hat. He was a lithe and well-made youth, with a lanky build and a shock of dark blue hair.

Aegon is inrroduced standing above the rest, literally high-standing.

By imagery, Aegon is real.++

An older couple with a Rhoynish cast to their features stood close beside the tiller, whilst a handsome septa in a soft white robe stepped through the cabin door and pushed a lock of dark brown hair from her eyes.

This is actually what I came for, Lemore.

Why a septa would be described as “handsome” when that should have no relevance since she’s supposed to be chaste (I know, it’s Tyrion, but still)? Ashara Dayne is described by many as being beautiful, arrestingly so. If Lemore is Ashara, “handsome” is a good way to describe her beauty still.

Lemore has dark brown hair. Ashara is described as having long dark hair tumbling about her shoulders. More importantly, Lemore's first actions is push her hair from her eyes. Like, pay attention to this woman’s eyes, even though they’re not described ever (not even their colour).

TYRION IV ~ ADWD

Tyrion had drunk himself blind his first night on the Shy Maid. The next day he awoke with dragons fighting in his skull.

So yes, the night after Tyrion meets Aegon and his party for the first time, he dreams of dragons fighting. Take note these are dragons, not a fake dragon in whatever way and a dragon.

By imagery, Aegon is real.++.

The clouds in the sky were aglow: pink and purple, maroon and gold, pearl and saffron. One looked like a dragon. Once a man has seen a dragon in flight, let him stay at home and tend his garden in content, someone had written once, for this wide world has no greater wonder. Tyrion scratched at his scar and tried to recall the author's name. Dragons had been much in his thoughts of late.

One of those clouds looks like a dragon. There’s no dragons with these colours BUT Targs have purple eyes and Viseryion, a dragon I believe is a narrative stand-in for Aegon VI, is described as cream and gold, so one colour here. Honestly, the important here is that Tyrion is associating dragons around Aegon.

By imagery, Aegon is real.++.

"Good morrow, Hugor." Septa Lemore had emerged in her white robes, cinched at the waist with a woven belt of seven colors. Her hair flowed loose about her shoulders. "How did you sleep?"

Holy shit.

“Even after all these years, Ser Barristan could still recall Ashara's smile, the sound of her laughter. He had only to close his eyes to see her, with her long dark hair tumbling about her shoulders and those haunting purple eyes.

"Fitfully, good lady. I dreamed of you again." A waking dream. He could not sleep, so he had eased a hand between his legs and imagined the septa atop him, breasts bouncing.

"A wicked dream, no doubt. You are a wicked man. Will you pray with me and ask forgiveness for your sins?"

Only if we pray in the fashion of the Summer Isles. "No, but do give the Maiden a long, sweet kiss for me."

Laughing, the septa walked to the prow of the boat. It was her custom to bathe in the river every morning.

"Plainly, this boat was not named for you," Tyrion called as she disrobed.

"The Mother and the Father made us in their image, Hugor. We should glory in our bodies, for they are the work of gods."

Yeah, it’s Tyrion, who’d sexualise a rock, but this is a septa who deserves respect. Yet, this is how the writer “paints” the reader’s first interaction with this new character. These are always the most striking moments when establishing a character and sex imagery is what the writer decided to do.

Also Lemore not only knows that Tyrion’s fantasising about having sex with her and doesn’t give a shit, she laughs instead, gets naked to bathe, and doesn’t give a shit if others look at her naked body. This doesn’t feel like a septa. I mean, I remember Mordane and the zealots at King’s Landing who screwed with Cersei. They have nothing on this.

The way she puts why she has no problems with naked bodies and the like also suggest some kind of “free spirit” which goes well with the (disgusting, but there) dornish wanton woman trope and being dishonoured by Brandon at Harrenhal.

Another thing to note, is that Tyrion also clearly says the “Shy Maid” wasn’t named after Lemore, which suggests she’s neither shy nor a maid. This is confirmed by her actions and by...

The dwarf watched Lemore slip into the water. The sight always made him hard. There was something wonderfully wicked about the thought of peeling the septa out of those chaste white robes and spreading her legs. Innocence despoiled, he thought … though Lemore was not near as innocent as she appeared. She had stretch marks on her belly that could only have come from childbirth.

Lemore was pregnant at one point!

When Lemore climbed back onto the deck, Tyrion savored the sight of water trickling between her breasts, her smooth skin glowing golden in the morning light. She was past forty, more handsome than pretty, but still easy on the eye. Being randy is the next best thing to being drunk, he decided. It made him feel as if he was still alive. "Did you see the turtle, Hugor?" the septa asked him, wringing water from her hair. "The big ridgeback?"

This disparity of behaviour between septa Lemore and any other septa in ASOIAF is VERY suspicious.  Note how Lemore has two mysteries about her already, she’s characterised nothing like any septa in ASOIAF (more like the tasteless “dornish wanton woman” sterotype instead) and a mystery child. What’s the point of that, if she’s irrelevant.

Compare how he Yandry and Ysilla couple is treated, where there are no bizarre things taking place that I noticed. Also Yandry and Ysilla are specifically said to be a pair of Dornish orphans. Why is the image of Dornish people here, along with Lemore? Suspicious, suspicious.

Lemore is “past fourty”. The asoiaf wiki lists Ashara Dayne as being born between 260AC and 269AC, which means that she’d be around this age if she had lived.

The imagery of a (false, but still) maidtaking a bath while men watch is the same as Florian and Jonquil song, an event that legend says happened at Maidenpool (close to... yes, that’s right, Harrenhal, where Ashara met Brandon).

"The turtles have their charms, I will allow. Nothing delights me so much as the sight of a nice pair of shapely … shells.

"Septa Lemore laughed. Like everyone else aboard the Shy Maid, she had her secrets. She was welcome to them. I do not want to know her, I only want to fuck her. She knew it too. As she hung her septa's crystal about her neck, to nestle in the cleft between her breasts, she teased him with a smile.

That’s not the behaviour of a septa and note the narrative acknowledgement that Lemore has secrets. She’s also called Lady instead of septa at some point in the narrative.

If this is Ashara, then Brandon met his match at Harrenhal. The waste, I can’t. What a sexy couple.

This chapter also contains Targ history as well as some Dorne (mother Rhoyne and whatnot). It goes well with Aegon is the real deal. But what really cinches it is the ending...

"It was him," cried Yandry. "The Old Man of the River."And why not?

Tyrion grinned. Gods and wonders always appear, to attend the birth of kings.

The Old Man of the River is a lesser god, the son of Mother Rhoyne. These gods are all associated with Dorne.

Aegon is real.++.

Tyrion VI ~ ADWD

"Even the bravest of your forebears kept his Kingsguard close about him in times of peril." Lemore had changed out of her septa's robes into garb more befitting the wife or daughter of a prosperous merchant. Tyrion watched her closely. He had sniffed out the truth beneath the dyed blue hair of Griff and Young Griff easily enough, and Yandry and Ysilla seemed to be no more than they claimed to be, whilst Duck was somewhat less. Lemore, though … Who is she, really? Why is she here? Not for gold, I'd judge. What is this prince to her? Was she ever a true septa?

Who is she, really... indeed... Lemore’s identity clearly is important.

She turned back to Prince Aegon. "You are not the only one who must needs hide."

Why does Lemore need to hide? :)

[emotions-ew]

A Collection of Queer Country Artists and Songs for anyone who doesn’t feel like there’s country music they can relate to...

There is this idea that country music is like just Republican men singing about beer, and trucks and also Jesus,  and that is kind of fair because loads of it is but there are some cool as hell queer/lgbtq+ country artists. Finding those and finding that representation in a genre of music I was literally raised on kind of changed my life in a tiny way and I wanted to share that.

(This is by no means a comprehensive list and also I’m basing the “Country” part of this sometimes on my subjective opinion/limited music knowledge so yuh please don’t hate me if I get some wrong)

Also link below for a Spotify playlist of my favourite gay/gayish country music, some mentioned in this post some not, (with a title that isn’t obviously gay for anyone who can’t openly listen to gay stuff on their public accounts for whatever reason) so feel free to skip the massive essay and just jump straight to that. And pretty please repost if I missed anyone/ any songs you love.

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7KB6PmUxnpkU7lih8Bysvw

Artists To Follow:

Chely Wright

- Right off the bat, Chely Wright is a legend and I’m in love with her. So, in the 90′s Chely Wright was kind of a huge deal. She started her career as a singer/songwriter and released her first album in ‘94, which was critically acclaimed although never reached the commercial success of her later works. By ‘97 she was really hitting her stride, dropping her breakout hit “Shut up and Drive” (a personal favourite of mine) followed two years later by the biggest hit of her career “Single White Female”. Throughout all that Chely Wright was, to the world, a good old fashioned, heterosexual southern gal. Privately it was a bit of a different story. She had public relationships with male country artists, all while pursuing a secret decade long relationship with a woman. 

I hadn’t ever really heard a Chely Wright song until a few years ago so I never knew about her music or career pre-coming out but I do know that even though by the time she came out in 2010 she was by no means at the height of her fame Chely Wright is kind of one of the biggest names in country music to be out and proud (in my opinion) and I love her like an insane amount. I literally play her music in my car when I have passengers just so I can be like “fun fact this singer is actually gay-” and then subject them to a lengthy explanation of her entire career. She came out with an album and a memoir and the album is my favourite of her work because it’s so fucking raw and because I relate to most of it immensely. Anyways Chely Wright went fucking through it in her journey to being her authentic self and now she’s out and proud and married to a woman and they have a family together and I’m a fucking sucker for a happy ending and y’all should add her to every playlist you have. And on top of that her music is genuinely good. Coming out undoubtedly damaged her career but I think that

Brandi Carlile 

- As far as I can tell Brandi Carlile has been out her whole career. I feel like this list is just going to be me saying “I’m in love with her” about a bunch of women old enough to be my mother but in my defence, I am honestly in love with her. She’s been making music since she was like, seventeen, and has had a bunch of massive hits, as a singer, songwriter, and producer. If you want to cry kind of happy tears listen to her performance of “Bring my Flowers Now” with Tanya Tucker. She’s won Grammy’s and CMT awards and she’s done it all as an out Queer woman. She’s also a founding member of The Highwomen, an all-female country music group who released their first album in 2019, comprised of Carlile, Marren Morris, Natalie Hemby and Amanda Shires. I really love this band because they’re four artists who are immensely successfully in their own right collabing, much like the Highwaymen, and their music is phenomenal while also being a fuck you to mainstream country music and their inability to properly represent women in country music spaces. 

She’s been married to a woman (smoking hot and also brilliant) since 2012 and they have two kids together and if you want to cry (again) then you have to listen to her song “Mother” about her eldest daughter. A queer country artist absolutely worth adding to all your playlists. 

Brooke Eden

- As I understand it Eden came out publicly in January of this year. She’s engaged to Hilary Hoover, who she’s been dating since 2015 apparently. I can’t even imagine the pressure that must be on a person and how stressful it would be to keep a relationship secret from the whole world for years and personally I think they’re a cute as hell couple and I wish them literally all the happiness in the world. 

Brooke Eden has a few older songs that I think are really good, my favourite being “Act Like You Don’t”, and while her new stuff isn’t my usual country vibe I am a sucker for literally anything gay and it is legally my gay duty to stream any song that she releases to support my fellow queer. It’s quite different to anything Wright or Carlile sing but I actually kind of love that because it shows that country music of all different shapes and sizes and styles can be sung by queer artists. 

Amythyst Kiah

- Okay so I am a very new listener to Amythyst Kiah, but her music is literally so beautiful it would be a straight up sin to not include her on this list. Her music is country-blues-roots esq (more roots than country, I think?) and her voice is so unique. She grew up in Chattanooga and has been playing music since childhood. She recently made her Opry debut which is fucking awesome. She also belongs to a band called Our Native Daughters, described as “A supergroup of Black women in traditional music”. Their debut album “Songs of Our Native Daughters” did numbers and I haven’t listened to the whole thing but my favourite so far are “Black Myself” and “I Knew I Could Fly” so y’all add that to your playlists along with “Wild Turkey” by Amythyst Kiah because holy hell her voice on that will blow your mind.

Steve Grand

-        The first man to make this list, he should frankly be honoured. Grand has been an out and proud gay man making country music since like 2013, and I have so much respect for an artist who chose to simply never be in, choosing instead to simply write gay ass songs about being in love with men and letting the chips fall where they man. His music is always going to have a special place in my heart and, he’s cute so if you’re into men and music by men give him a google. add him to your playlists, his All-American Boy album is literally just a dozen songs that are perfect to yell-sing along to.

Katie Pruitt

-        Not hugely knowledgeable on Katie Pruitt but her music makes me feel crazy intense emotions and is absolutely gay

 Honorable Mention Artists I haven’t Really Listened to But Who I Know to be gay thanks to google and might be your thing so totally check them out:

Brandy Clark

Ty Herndon

Shelly Fairchild

Lavendar Country

Trixie Mattel

Cameron Hawthorn

Drop any other names of artists or songs you know of 

 Specific Songs That Make Me Fucking Cry or (in good and bad ways (but always in a gay way)) or basically are just gay as hell:

If She Ever Leaves Me; The Highwomen

- So, this album came out about a week before my first (and only) girlfriend broke up with me. The general gist of the song is a woman singing about how her loved isn’t ever going to leave her but if she does it sure as hell won’t be for a creepy man in a bar. A little ironic that I felt I related to it so intensely, considering she did in fact leave me. There’s this one lyric that goes “I’ve loved her in secret/I’ve lover here out loud/the sky hasn’t always been blue” and my girlfriend and I were crazy deep in the closet so I drew her a cute little picture of a grey cloud and on the back I wrote that lyric and I gave it to her and to me it was kind of a promise that one day I’d get a chance to love her out loud and even though I never actually did this song is forever going to make me cry because of the little bit of hope that lyric gave me and the way it’s inclusion on this overwhelmingly mainstream country album made me feel like acceptance was just that little bit closer. 

 All American Boy; Steve Grand

- Definitely one of the first gay country songs I ever heard, and Steve Grand didn’t once sacrifice a scrap of country for the gay. It’s beautiful, it’s a little sad, it’s hopeful. It’s forever going to hold a special place in my heart and the music videos is kind of one of my favourites ever. I found this song before I found myself and the way it made my heart warm should have been a stronger sign than I took it to be. 

Like Me; Chely Wright

- When you love someone you kind of make it your mission to know them in a way that no one else can. This song by Chely Wright is sort of an ode to that, and how even once you lost someone, you’re still going to know every little thing about them. On top of that it sort of speaks to the idea that all these things Wright learned about this woman, she learned in secret and she knew her and loved her in secret and now that they’re gone from each other she’s left with all of this knowledge and all of these questions and no one to answer them. I love the way it’s so slow and the melody and her voice, the way it’s low and a little raspy, make this one of my favourite Chely Wright songs.

The Mother; Brandi Carlile

-        Sorry but a song about being a mother by a queer woman is going to make me cry every time and actually I’m not that sorry. It’s quite a simple song, if any song written by Brandi Carlile can ever be described as ‘simple’, it’s an ode to her daughter. My favourite line is “you are not an accident/where no one thought it through” because it speaks to the fact that in order for queer women to have a kid together they have to want it so damn bad and also I just like the way her voice sounds on that line. This song is also the perfect thing to listen to if you ever for a second feel like being gay/queer is going to stand in the way of you having a family because it absolutely doesn’t have to and if that’s something you want, you can have it. Don’t let people try and convince you otherwise.

Loving Her; Katie Pruitt

-        Unapologetic gay love. Opening a song with “If loving hers a sin, I don’t wanna go to heaven” is a fucking baller move and she went there. The lyrics are beautiful, and her voice is phenomenal. It could be a sad song, about confronting religious repression and grappling with what that means for your love, but instead its triumphant. Katie Pruitt doesn’t give a fuck if you have a problem because she’s going to write songs for her lover.

Jesus From Texas; Semler

-        Not actually totally sure this is a country song, but it has the words ‘Jesus’ and ‘Texas’ in the title so I feel safe including it in this list. Honestly, I don’t really know why I relate so hard to this song. Like, I wasn’t really raised with religion, so I don’t know what it is about this funky little tune that makes me want to sob but there’s something about this tune that makes me want to do whatever the opposite of get up and dance is, but like, in a good way.

Lovin’ Again; Steve Grand

-        Breakup song that ends kind of positively? So good to sing along to at high, high volumes. The idea that losing someone doesn’t have to mean losing yourself and just because you can’t love them doesn’t mean you’re not ever going to love again. But also kind of about how it’s hard to get over someone, I don’t know it’s just good.

Cryin’ These Cocksucking Tears; Lavender Country

-        Jesus christ if this isn’t the coolest shit I’ve ever heard in my life. Sorry but a gay country group formed in 1972 who dropped possibly the first gay themed country album, and this was the title of one of the songs. God I am in love.

 Songs that (to me) are a little fruity or that I just relate to in a gay way:

Picket Fences; Chely Wright

-          Chely Wright is gay but this song came out long before she did and when she wrote it, it wasn’t supposed to be gay which is why it’s in this section and not the previous. The reason it’s included at all is because frankly ma’am, Mrs Wright, it’s a little fruity. And I feel a little bad for joking because honestly to me, the way I hear this song and knowing the context (that Wright was deeply closeted at the time she wrote and released it), it’s kind of just sad. The general gist of the song is Wright asking what’s so great about a traditional lifestyle anyways. It could be read as a woman genuinely questioning why we push that expectation that she’ll have two kids and a husband and a picket fence lifestyle, or even could be read as a woman who’s trying to deflect how much she does in fact want that, you have to listen and form your own opinion. But to me, it feels like a woman who’s desperately trying to justify why she doesn’t want that life not because she can’t have it, but she knows it will never be right for her. I don’t know it’s hard to explain I just feel like this song is a little bit gay even though I’m sure she didn’t intend that.

Sinning with You; Sam Hunt

-          Sorry but this song is gay. Sorry but you can’t write the lines “I never felt like I was sinning with you/Always felt like I could talk to God in the morning” and “if it’s so wrong why did it feel so right” and “But I never felt shame, never felt sorry/Never felt guilty touching your body” and not to mention the opening line of “raised in the first pew/praises for yeshua/case of a small town repression”, and expect to not sit in my car sobbing as I realised that while I never felt like what we did was a sin she absolutely did, and wishing I could have told her that I was sorry for making her carry the weight of both our souls but also that it wasn’t a sin and nothing in the world could feel that good and be that bad and it isn’t right that she had to be so ashamed of something that was just so good. Sam Hunt actually said after he wrote the song that while it was reflection on his own relationship with faith he genuinely hopes that people in the lgbtq community can like find comfort or whatever in his words and like go off king, we stan an ally.

  How do I Get There; Deana Carter

-          This ones easy, it’s about falling in love with your best friend and suddenly realising you want more than just friendship with them. Sorry Deana, that’s gay. In my Deana Carter of like Year 10 I played this song on repeat and screamed along to the lyrics as though singing it hard enough would make her like me back.

[dizzydancingdreamer]

The Servant and The Prince | One

I did it-- I wrote something. Was it what everyone wanted? Gods no. But it is something. So do enjoy my lovelies-- a break from my not so regularly scheduled content.

Description: This is very much a Cinderella trope because I cannot help myself and I am in love with Loki 

Pairing: Loki x Female!Reader, third person as I may adapt eventually with an OC 

Warnings: violence but very minor, emotional abuse, some strong-ish language

Tags: Angst but you can imply fluff 

Word count: 3.8k

Next

Master List

“Did you pack my dress!” A shrill voice assaults her eardrums as she scurries towards the door.

It comes from a tall, thin, young woman. Her face and fingers are boney, her blonde hair falling in perfect waves down her back. The faintest aroma of honeysuckles and violets wafts off her creamy skin. She is beautiful, her step sister Anna. At least in theory. The sneer on her cherry lips and the hatred in her cerulean eyes, unclouded and accusatory, can’t be hidden by any length of silky dress or ruby lipstick, though. She is ugly, even if just on the inside.  

Y/n almost drops the bags in her hands- almost. She only flinches inwardly. She is used to the constant demands. Clean the house, cook the meal, wash my clothes. This and that and more. So much more. She’ll never flinch though. No matter what. That is a promise she made to herself too long ago.

“Yes milady. It is already in the carriage alongside the rest of your requested belongings. Is there anything else I can do for you before we leave?” Her own voice is gentle in comparison; a breeze trying to hold its own against a tornado.

Anna’s sneer deepens and she huffs, spinning on her heel, her dress spiraling around her in a show of pink tulle. She does not say anything as she storms away, most likely on her way to her mother’s ornate carriage. That’s another thing that is more beautiful on the inside than out. If only everyone else knew that Y/n’s step family is poorer than dirt. Estrid, Anna’s mother, hides it well under the last remains of her father’s hard earned money. Gold encrusted carriages and a large home and clothing dripping in jewels. He is gone though, Y/n’s father, and the money will soon be completely gone as well. If only people glanced a little further and saw her dress- not terribly tattered but hand sewn out of the plainest fabric- and the overwhelming lack of staff in the big home. The signs are all there, sitting in plain sight. 

That is exactly the reason Y/n is loading the carriage- a last ditch attempt for her step mother and step sister to rise back to the wealth they once enjoyed. There is to be a ball. A royal ball. Apparently it is supposed to be much grander than the solstice festivals her small village holds. She always thought those were magnificent; the dancing and the feasts. She loved attending them before her father had died. He would take her and her mother every year and they would find their seats under the stars, eating and dancing to their heart’s desire. Her chest squeezes painfully; she misses them both dearly. Now that they are gone those few days of the year are her only escape- the nights where she can pretend she is anything but a lowly servant. 

She blanches wondering how much grander the ball will be. Surely it will be more than turkey under the stars and the ribbon dances of her youth. It will be in the castle- in a ballroom bigger than her house and the neighbours combined. Bigger even. She has never been in a ballroom. Sometimes the village hall holds weddings but they are small and serve vegetable stew and play music composed of fiddles and flutes. All the things she is most familiar with. The castle will have things she does not understand. Clothes worth more than her life and the richest foods and music that is so intricate that she wonders if her ears will be able to withstand it. She has heard stories of how wonderful it is- and how magnificently out of her element she will be.

Y/n sighs, pulling her shoulders straight and hiking the bags further up her body. This is no time for dawdling- there is no time that can be wasted now. She drags herself and the bags out the door, sparing a quick glance over her shoulder at her family home. It used to be filled with warmth. The kind that comes with baking bread and knitting beside an open fire and laughter. Now the halls are bare. Almost all traces of her mother and father are gone. She wears them across her chest in her mothers old leather satchel. Along the side of the bag, little green Dahlias are sewn into the worn material. She brushes her finger over the side, taking a deep breath. Maybe the ball will be a new adventure- even if she is not to attend. She will still be visiting the capitol. 

“By Odin, what are you doing? We have to go now or we will miss the opening festivities! Move you little wench!” 

Estrid’s nasally voice sounds from behind Y/n seconds before a hand connects with her back, shoving her forward. The bags on her shoulders and arms add to the momentum from the push, the uneven weight more than enough to have her stumbling over her feet. She tries to catch her balance, rushing down the steps as though being led by the bags themselves, but it is useless. Her heel catches on the last step and she falls backwards, her back connecting with the cobblestones, her elbow piling into the stone step. White hot pain blossoms through her body, pooling like fire in her injuries. She swallows the scream in her throat. It tastes like iron on her tongue- like eating the burnt chips left in the pot after the meals are finished being served. It tastes familiar. 

A red heel stomps next to her, crunching on the cobble stone the same way her spine had. It lands inches away from her hand, narrowly missing her pinky. Y/n looks up, her features as schooled as possible, greeting Estrid with a bow of her head. Even that small action causes pain to spike through her lower back and she has to hold her breath to keep from crying out. She does not look at her step mother for more than a few seconds- she knows better than to do any such thing- but it is enough time to catch the familiar sneer. It is the same one she has passed on to Anna but more hateful. Honed. Estrid has had years to perfect her evilness, even if she does not look a day over thirty. She too is beautiful in her own dark way.

“You should be ashamed of yourself,” Elstrid spits down at Y/n, already on her way to the carriage as she passes by the crumpled girl. “It is as though you are trying to ruin your sister’s chance for happiness. You can never just be grateful, can you? It must always be about you. How pathetic.”

Y/n could laugh. She can almost feel it there in the base of her throat, bubbling with the scream and cries which are also locked away. Neither are forgotten yet- they never are. They just build and build and build like the wind that blows through her village in the spring, gaining enough speed to wipe out entire fields of crop. Now there is laughter on top as well. The cruel kind that makes her insides twist and burn. 

What a perfect way to describe how she feels; pathetic. She forces herself to her knees, followed quickly by her feet as she gathers the bags, mulling over the word. Pathetic. She hauls them onto her shoulders once again, trying her hardest to ignore the way her back and arm aches and the flood of fresh tears that rush to her eyes. She loads the bags into the back of the carriage, nodding at the driver. He looks at her with pity but remains silent as Estrid climbs into her plush seat. The word rings again, louder. Pathetic. 

Y/n tugs the satchel across her body as she climbs onto the back of the carriage, folding her cloak over her lap. Yes, indeed she feels pathetic, cast to ride to the capitol backwards with her skin exposed to the elements and her hair doomed to be a windblown mess. Pathetic does not even begin to cover everything she feels in this moment. If her step family is poorer than dirt than she must be something even worse than dirt as well. She feels so at least. 

Somehow, though, beneath it all, she also feels a touch hopeful. She is going to the capitol, after all. Her fingers scratch over the green Dahlias, thinking back to the night her mother had sewn them. 

“Little dove did you know that you are like a Dahlia?” Her mother’s voice was sweet and soft- the kind of voice that made Y/n want to lean in until she could feel the words in her soul.

“What do you mean, mama?” She was not really asking to hear the answer, rather speaking in order to hear her mother keep speaking. 

The glow from the fireplace warmed Y/n’s cheek as she leaned further. Her mother smelled of yeast and berries. She could still taste the jam on her lips, warm and sweet from desert. Strawberry pie was her mother’s specialty. The warmth combined with her full belly made her eyes close slightly, her body sagging against her mother’s legs.

“You are so strong my little dove. You are so soft and so elegant,” her mother’s hand smoothed over her cheek, her fingers as soft as silk. “But you are so powerful too, I can sense it. You are overflowing with it and kindness. So much kindness. How did I create such a magnificent little girl, hmm?”

Y/n giggles when her mother tickles under her chin lightly, pulling her hand away to continue on the pattern. Her stitches are meticulous and perfect- just like her mother. She watches as the vibrant green thread weaves below the fabric before reappearing. It happens over and over again, disappearing and reappearing like a little trick. She always loved tricks.

“Why are the flowers green, mama? I have never seen any green flowers in the meadow.”

It was true. There were pinks and blues and the most wonderful oranges. Never greens though. Only the stems were green.

“Oh my darling, you will one day. They do not grow here. They grow in the capitol by the hundreds, though. They surround the streets, growing high into the sky. They are beautiful, my little dove. Just like you are. You will see them one day, I promise you.” 

Y/n blinks away the image of her mother, letting a few of the tears drop as she does so. Nobody can see her here so it is okay now. It is times like these, in the midst of the worst and best moments of her life, when she misses her mother the most. She would do anything for one more gentle hug. One more whiff of berries and rising bread. She shifts on the stiff seat, her spine jostling against the metal frame of the cart and flaring in pain. She lets out a tiny cry, hoping it is masked by the sound of the wheels bumping over the stoney pathway. Her throat aches, squeezing at the stream of tears threatening her system. It is in this moment that she feels something foreign- something that will inevitably and unknowingly change her life as she knows it. Something that she is sure is not her own.

She feels angry.

*      *      *      *      *      *      *      *      *      *

Loki strolls over the castle grounds, his hands clasped behind his back and his shoulders straight. The sun is shining on his face, warm and soft. The air, like always, smells like pine trees and fragrant flowers. That is partly the cause of the woman next to him. She is beautiful, there is no doubt about it. From her golden hair, knotted in bands across the crown of her head, to her gown, a soft blue silk. It flows behind her as she walks, like a river carving from each step she takes. One of her dainty hands is curled around his arm. Usually he would mind the touching- contact with other people is not his thing. More so Thor’s, his untamed brother. With her, though, he swallows his pride every time. He would do most anything to keep his mother happy. 

He peers down at Frigga, his face stoic in comparison to the bright smile she wears. She still looks as young as she had when he and Thor were mere boys. Her cheeks and nose are slender, her skin unblemished by age. The only difference is that now he stands taller than her, looking down at her blonde hair instead of up at it from under her arms. He has no doubt that his mother will remain beautiful for a long time- even when her age finally catches up with her.

“You are staring, dear.” Frigga’s voice teases and his neck snaps straight, his eyes flicking back to the gardens of green around him. “You only stare when you have something on your mind. I presume I do not have to inquire to know what it is. I will anyway, though, if that is what you would like?” 

Her voice drips into a worried tone that only she can muster. It is sincere. It makes it harder for him to be angry at the small, beautiful woman. 

“You will anyway and we both know it.” He muses, reaching a hand out to brush one of the green flowers. 

The petals are impossibly soft. Dahlias. He remembers when his mother had them planted all those years ago. It was a week’s affair- the castle had smelt of earth and new flowers for days afterwards. He remembers playing in the mud with his brother. The laughter. It seems like a lifetime ago. That was when everything was simple; when he was not about to get married to a princess he would meet at a ball that he does not even wish to attend. 

Frigga sighs, pulling her son to a gentle stop. He obliges with a sigh that matches her own. “It must be done. By decree your brother and you should have been married a year ago. The royal ball is the way it has been done for many millennia. I have tried to slow tradition- to give you two as much time as possible- but there are some who watch us closely. They wait-”

He turns away from her, a scowl on his lips. “I know mother. They want us to show weakness. I understand the premise, I promise you I am not an idiot. I suppose I just do not see how a wife would make me seem less weak.”

He is a god- a powerful one at that. It is hard to believe there are many people out there able who are able to strip him of that power. It makes no sense to get married because of an outdated tradition- especially not for some sort of ruse. He is strong enough on his own; he always has been. Quiet and capable and strong. Independently so. He has never been much for teams. Besides, he doubts there will be many women attending with the hopes of meeting him. Not when his brother will be standing right by his side. The god of thunder. There are many things Loki can do- most of which are quite impressive. Tricks of the mind and the ability to create fire at will and so on. One thing he cannot do, however, is spout lightning from his fingers. He cannot compete with that level of visible godliness and thus there is no reason to attend. He is not second best and will not treat himself as such.

Frigga catches his chin, pulling him to look at her crystal eyes- the same crystal eyes which she rolls at him. “She will balance you, dear. The point is not to make you appear less weak. You are not weak. It is to make you appear happy. A happy prince means a happy king. Happy means powerful, Loki. it is power.” 

He tenses and her eyes soften. “I am happy, mother. I am happy on my own.”

She lets her hand fall to his arm, shaking her head. Her knotted hair bounces slightly. She is giggling again in the way that only mothers can- the kind of giggle that is all knowing. It makes his skin itch, his hands secured behind his back again. How is it that she always makes him feel seen even when he does not wish to be?

“Is there something you wish to say?” He grumbles to the woman, wishing he could hate the way she grins up at him with a twinkle in her eye. He cannot though, even if he tried. 

“My dear,” she hums gently, squeezing his arm, “I think perhaps you will come to revoke your words. That is all.”

Oh she is truly infuriating. There she goes again, so freely sharing her mind even when he has made it clear time and time again that he has no wish for a wife. Not only because he does not want to marry a woman he has never met but for other reasons too. The tips of his fingers turn to ice against his palms at the thought. He does not have to look down to know they are the brilliant blue that he so loathes. There is much he wishes to remain a secret beyond the confines of his household. He would rather not be married to a woman who thinks him a monster for the rest of his life. He will pass. 

He opens his mouth, ready to fire back at her annoying laughter, when suddenly he cannot speak. Not just that, though. He cannot breath, either, or stand for that matter. Soon the trickster god is on his knees, his hands digging painfully against the cobblestone path. His nails bite against the stones, his icy fingers now burning. It is nothing near the pain in his back though which flares as though he had just been kicked. Moments later his elbow erupts into pain as well, searing down the entire length of his arm. He grinds his teeth through the pain, his eyes screwed shut. 

“Loki?” Frigga’s voice holds none of the teasing it had only moments ago, only pure worry as she kneels next to her son. “Dear what happened? What is wrong? Shall I call for someone?”

His eyes snap open at that, his head shaking frantically. “No, no. I am fine. Do not call anyone.”

Even as he says it he knows that it is not true. His whole body aches as he rolls onto his feet, rising shakily. His mother’s eyes watch him closely, the blue clouded with something he does not recognize. He straightens after a moment, forcing the pain out of his mind. 

“Did you trip, dear?” Her voice this time is guarded, concealed with a falsely loose tone. 

Loki narrows his eyes. “No, I do not think so. It felt like someone pushed me. Do you know something about that mother?”

The scowl on her face is genuine this time, her golden brows creasing. “I sure hope you are not insinuating that I pushed my own son, Loki.”

He sighs again, guilt flooding his aching body. “No, mother. I am sorry-”

The end of his sentence drops into the space between them, cut off by an overwhelming feeling of agony. Not the physical kind, though. Yes, his back is screaming in pain as he stands on those dreadful cobblestones but that is not why he stops speaking. It is the wave of self loathing that hits him out of nowhere. It is hot and angry and cold and desperate all at once. 

It feels like when he was little and his brother had thrown him into the sea to teach him to swim. He had not been ready and he swallowed a mouthful of the salty water. It had been like cold lead in his lungs, weighing him to the bottom of the surf. He had been so scared, clawing towards the faint light of the surface with no luck. Everytime he got close the light seemed to shrink further back. Soon the icy lead had turned molten when he could no longer breathe, his chest constricting under the weight of the water. The fear had turned him into some sort of crazed animal until finally he had kicked his legs hard enough to break the surface and suck in a breath of air. 

It is the exact same way he feels now; panicked- like he has no clue how to get to the air again. He claws at his chest, his eyes blown wide. The world around him begins to spin. He is breathing- he knows he is, he can feel his chest heaving up and down- but he cannot taste the pine on the air anymore. He can only taste iron and salt and hatred, brash against his lips. It turns his vision red, his muscles tensing as though preparing for a fight in which he cannot identify the threat. Like the waves that pushed him under, the enemy is everywhere and nowhere. The only thing that makes it subside is his mothers hand on his cheek, warm and soft through the panic eating away at his chest.

He meets her eyes, squeezing his hands into fists at his sides. He grinds his words through his clenched teeth. “I have no idea what is happening to me.”

The small blonde swallows, her throat bobbing slightly. Her face is not the picture of shock like Loki’s is. Of course she is slightly panicked, he can see it in the way her fingers tremble as she brushes them down his shoulder. Somehow he knows that it is not the same kind of panic he feels. His all-knowing mother is stalling. It only serves to heighten the drowning feeling.

“I think I know what it is, dear.” She tests, her hands folding against her chest, clasping to hide the tremors.

Frigga’s response does little to ease the panic- if anything it makes it worse. Usually his mother is the only thing that can calm him. If he had to close his eyes and picture the person in which he feels most comfortable around- it would be her. Today though, that is to change. She seems scared. He pushes himself through the pain, biting through the iron and salt on his tongue. 

“What do you know, mother.” It is not a question- it is a demand.

She straightens as well, sucking in the air that he cannot seem to find for the life of him. It makes him jealous- angry.

“Well,” she flicks her eyes up to the sky, avoiding the next words out of her mouth. “I think you might have a soulmate, my dear.” 

[fredweesleyismyslut]

Forever be yours - Draco Malfoy x Curvy!muggle!reader

A/N: Hey guys!!!!!  I was looking through my list of things that I should write.  It’s literally just a stupid list of ideas that I randomly get before bed because someone(me) apparently can’t sleep at night and sits around lying in bed for an hour before finally passing out.  Anyways, I wrote this whenever I wasn’t busy so I hope you guys like it!!!  Bye, and enjoy!!

You were sitting at lunch with your friends eating lunch, talking about random things.  Your best friend who was sitting closest to you says, “Hey, you’ve been awfully quiet today.”  Looking up you responded, “I’m just tired, I think I stayed up too late.  It’s just...Pansy said-”  Your friend immediately cuts you off, “Do I have to stab a bitch?  Or...I mean I’m ready for anything I just need you to tell me before so I can prepare-”  “No no...oh my god...well, now I know who to go to if I want to hide a body.”  She smiles, nudging you slightly, “For you?  Anything...especially if it comes to Pansy I can’t stand her ugh it’s like she created her whole personality off of Mr.Scrooge.”  Snorting softly, you nudge her back before breaking out into soft laughter, “So, what’s the problem with her that’s got you so worried.”  “Well, she told me that….that Draco asked her to go to his family Christmas dinner.”  Rolling her eyes she grabs your hand, “I can already see her smug smile.  Well, did you ask Draco?”  Shaking your head you looked down at your hands, “I-I didn’t get the chance to.  I mean his parents don’t even know we’re dating and I’m y’know-”  Cutting you off yet again, “You’re what?  Amazing?  Gorgeous?  Wonderful? A Goddess?  Basically everything better than Pansy?”  Corners of your lips curving softly you look her in the eyes, “Thank you...but I’m just worried we all know how his parents are and me not being the…” whispering the last part, “y’know a muggle and not meeting the...beauty standard.”  “Okay, you know what?  You are valid in feeling that way but I want you to know y/n that you are absolutely gorgeous I would kill for your body and if they don’t like you then it’s Draco who has to either step up for you or you kick him to the curb because I won’t let you accept any less.  Got it?”  She stared intensely into your eyes till you finally nodded, “Yes, mother, I got it.  Thanks for the pep talk.”  Putting her arm around your shoulders she smiled, “Anytime because I am not letting my best friend talk shit about herself.”  Then, she shook your shoulder softly, “There he is.  Go talk to him now.”  

You looked up, seeing the crown of golden hair that you’ve grown to love so much.  Draco practically glowed in the soft glow of the lights, laughing at something his friends said.  Nudging you up slightly, your friend asks, “Want me to come with?”  Shaking your head softly, you declined, “I need to talk to him and I’m pretty sure if I bring you you’ll just glare at him intensely like a lion waiting to pounce.”  Chuckling softly she replied, “Well if you need help just yknow shout and I’m ready.”  She mimed punching someone then as if feeling your nerves, she softly gripped your hand, “It’ll be fine.  Seriously, I can tell how much he’s changed since he’s been with you.  When he looks at you he looks like he is staring into the face of God, like he’s head over heels for you.”  Nodding you gripped her hand back for comfort before letting go to talk to Draco.  His head lifted up as soon as he saw you, a smile forming on his lips immediately at the sight of you, eyes widening like a puppy seeing his owner come home all he needed was a tail.  A girl at the table said something, immediately causing Draco to give an intense glare that if looks could kill you know her head would’ve toppled off and flown twenty feet into next Tuesday.  He stood up walking up to you and grasping your hand in his, “Hey, darling.  I didn’t get to see you yesterday.”  His blue eyes seemed to glow and change colors under the lights as you were drawn towards the comfort of his arms.  “I’m sorry I was kind of tired.”  He nodded as you continued, “Ummmm...are you busy?  We need to talk.”  His face seemed to contort between being worried and trying to keep a smile on.  Looking over his shoulder, he said, “Hey, be right back!”  before turning again to give a final soft glare.  

He took your hand in his leading you out into the hallway before finding a staircase.  “Is something wrong?”  he asked before worry creased his eyebrows even more, “Did I do something, love?”  Breathing to keep your voice from cracking you burst out quickly, “Are you embarrassed of me?” His face turned into utter confusion as he looks to your face, “Embarrassed?  What do you mean, darling?  Why would I be embarrassed?”  Hands trembling you hold his gaze, biting back tears, “I-I just” taking another deep breath you continued, “Pansy told me that you invited her to your family Christmas dinner.  But not me?  Did you not want your parents to see me?”  Draco’s mouth turns into a tight line, confirming your suspicions slightly before he places a hand on your cheek and sighed audibly, “That Pansy...I’m going to-” sighing and ruffling his perfectly gelled hair he continued, “I would never be embarrassed of you, you’re amazing...there’s no better words to describe you besides that you are the love of my life. I didn’t invite her I was asking her how I should invite you because...because we’ve been dating and of course I want you to meet my parents.”  His eyes meet yours briefly before skirting away to look at your hands, “I was afraid it would make you nervous to meet them since they’re not...they’re not the-”  His shoulders slump as he hears a soft sniffle from you, “I suggested she come with one of your friends to ease the dinner process and...and then you could stay the night…”  His hands were picking at each other as if he was having a very intense thumb war with himself, “I understand if you don’t want to come over or even spend the night it might be rushing-”  Cutting him off with a chaste kiss to the lips you smile grabbing his hands in yours, “You’re going to have bloody fingers doing that...Draco, my love, I would love to come over for dinner and...and spend the night.”  A smile spreads across his cheeks quickly as you continue, “We’ve been together for two years I definitely don’t think we’re rushing things and you’ve already met my parents it’s about time I meet yours...even if they don’t like me.”  He places a kiss on your forehead, pushing hair from your face as you opened your mouth to continue, “I do have one condition though.”  He raised his eyebrows in response, prompting you to continue, “Hermione gets to be my plus one.”  Draco’s mouth stutter softly, “Granger?  Why not any of your other friends?”  You smile softly, “Number one because if I brought any of my other friends we might have a full-on war at your house and you know that, especially knowing your father, my friend might bite his head off. Also, I love Hermione and I want her to come if she wants to.”  Draco nodded his head, knowing that your first point was very true, once when one his friends made a side comment about your appearance because you had decided to wear more fitting clothes and before Draco could respond your best friend immediately sent a fist flying his way and he learned from a broken nose not to mess with you.  From then on it was as if they had a silent agreement that they both loved you and would let no one harm you.  You kissed his cheek, rubbing your nose against his slightly before pulling away, “Alright, it’s decided then.  I’m spending Christmas with you and then we’re going back to my house the next day to bake cookies?  My mother misses you she thinks you’re an angel.”  Rolling your eyes softly as Draco chuckled you followed with, “I swear on Godric’s balls that she loves you more than me.  I’m pretty sure she wants us to get married just so you can be her son.”  Draco’s eyebrows perked up slightly as you realized what you’d said as he smiled softly with a glint in his eyes, “So, you talk about marrying me at home?”  Punching his shoulder you snorted, “Noooo…..”  As he laughed, “Speaking of marriage I think I’d like to have a daughter-”  Punching his arm slightly you kissed his lips, “Don’t get ahead of yourself pretty boy we’ve got a long ways to go before we think of kids, but if we did I think two is a good number.”  Draco’s eyes lit as he smiled softly at you, light reflecting off his hair making him look ethereal.  His forehead touched yours as he whispered, “I love you, y/n and I promise I’ll forever be yours.”  Eyes tearing up softly you smiled, “I love you too, Draco...ugh you’re making me cry.”

  Safe to say dinner went as well as could during Christmas with Hermione being as polite as possible and as soon as Draco’s father made a comment you and Hermione immediately went to town on putting him in his place.  This must’ve impressed him as he bit back any comments he said for the rest of dinner and made peace with you.  

The next day, your mother immediately went to Draco as she gave him a big hug, “Mom, just in case you forgot I’m your daughter.”  Draco laughed as your mother waved you off affectionately and he kissed your mom’s hand, “Honey, just wait I got dinner prepared for you.  I’m sure you’re hungry from traveling.”  Your dad came around to get your bags as he gave you a side hug, “He’s a good one, that boy.  In case the day comes, I want you to know I’m okay with you marrying him.  Don’t let him know though I want him to work for it.”  Laughing you linked arms with your dad, “He is a good one.  I love him, dad, like I really do.”  He patted your  shoulder watching as Draco was walking into your house arm linked with your mom as he turned and smiled at you, “I know sweetheart, and if I know anything about love I can tell that he’d do anything for you.”  Your mom peeked her head out the door, “Hurry up, y/n!  You’re letting the food get cold!”  “Okay, okay mom!”  Baking cookies with Draco was amazing as he helped...well if you call rubbing flour over your face helping.  Nonetheless, the cookies tasted amazingly perfect as your mother pulled you to the side before everyone was heading to bed.  “You know, honey...can I tell you something?”  Nodding you let her continue, “That boy...that boy is in love with you.  He stares at you like you’re his sunshine, I mean he could not take his eyes off you all night”  She sighed contentedly as she hummed softly walking off to bed, “Goodnight honey, and tell my future son-in-law good night too.”  Draco came around the corner as he said, “Good night, mom.”  If your mother cried any harder it would’ve been the most embarrassing night of your life second to when you threw up on your best friend after having one too many desserts at the Yule Ball.

[tinytonysnark]

Ask Me Later

It’s Valentine’s Day.

Steve has a date with someone who isn’t Tony, on Valentine’s Day.

Tony is in Steve’s dorm room, on Valentine’s Day, helping him pick out an outfit for his date, who isn’t Tony.

God, his life sucks.  

Natasha will no doubt laugh her ass off when he tells her once she’s finished gloating with her “I told you so’s,” and “I warned you this would happen,” but she’ll also let him eat all the ice cream she has so it won’t be too bad.

“What about this one?” Steve asks, pulling out a white cable knit sweater.

“God, no, definitely not the sweater. Move over, let me take a look at your closet,” Tony says, springing up from the bed to look at whatever Steve has in his tiny little closet.  

“You know, this would be better if you’d tell me who your date is with,” Tony says, not turning to face Steve who’s sitting on the edge of the bed.

“Tony - I already to-”

“I know - I know, you’d rather not say. Just would make this whole process easier is all I’m saying,” Tony tells him, and doesn’t think about how his best friend not only doesn’t feel the same way about him but also isn’t even comfortable enough to want to tell him who he’s seeing.

He might need Natasha to buy extra ice-cream tonight.

He thinks that’s what hurts the most. That they’ve been friends for over a year now, and best friends for what feels like longer, and they’ve told each other everything. Well, almost everything. Tony being utterly and completely in love with his best friend notwithstanding.

But apparently Steve has not only been crushing on someone else and asked them out, but he’s also never, not once, mentioned any of it to Tony.

“I guess, something casual? Nothing too over the top or fancy, but like I’m making the effort, you know,” Steve tells him.

“So the vibe you’re going for on this first date, on Valentine’s Day, the day known for its capitalistic ideas of love and romance, is casual?” Tony turns, tossing one of Steve’s plaid blue and grey plaid shirts in the trash pile - items of clothing that may or may not disappear from his closet to end up goodwill, if he has anything to say about it. “Well, I'm sure that it’ll all go down great. Hey, out of curiosity, do you have wedding dates set? I hear Spring’s lovely.”

“Ha, you’re hilarious. Truly, I’m in stitches,” Steve deadpans and Tony throws - yet another plaid shirt- at his face, which he dodges easily.

“I mean, you know me though. It’s not like I’m the most casual guy around,” Steve shrugs. “I’m all about long-term planning.”

Oh. “Oh, so you really like them then,” Tony says, turning back to the closet. “Like, you want this for more than just a few dates?

“Well, yeah. Definitely,” Steve answers, with no hesitation and Tony feels like he just set himself up to be kicked in the lungs, repeatedly.

He takes a few steadying breaths, and when he thinks he can trust his voice says, “Well, your anniversary will always be easy to remember at least. V-Day. Oh, unless you forget, in which case, you’d be forgetting both dates, which, yikes.”

Steve laughs, his full bellied laugh and Tony doesn’t even need to turn and look to know he knows Steve has his head thrown back and there're crinckles in the corner of his eyes, the way there always are when he smiles.

“Here,” Tony says, turning to hand the clothes, and yup, he was right. There’s that smile and the eye crinkles. “White tee, these absolutely ridiculous skinny jeans and this jacket. Can’t really go wrong with a classic white tee. Especially not with your shoulders-” Tony says before he can stop himself.

Steve grins as pinks dusts on Tony’s cheeks. “Thanks Tony. Just give a minute while I change."

Steve heads to the bathroom and Tony flings himself onto the bed to scream into a pillow before, pulling his phone out oh his back pocket and rolling over to text Nat.

“Please, please tell me you’re stocked up on Half Baked?”

Nat responds less than 30 seconds later, “Oof, jumped right over Mint Choc Chip and PBC? It must be BAD BAD.”

“He’s got his whole future planned out with this perfect date and they’re gonna live happily ever after and I’ll have to bear witness to all of it -”

The bathroom door opens and Steve steps out and Tony turns his head briefly before going back to finishing his text to Nat but then his brain finally processes the image from his eyes and he snaps his head back, while also losing grip of his phone. Which falls onto his forehead.

Ouch.

“You look - Well, I mean I know I put it together so obviously you look great but -”

Steve smiles, all bashful and sheepish, the way he does and Tony thinks he's gonna combust. “Thanks for, you know, helping me look presentable. You know I'm not too good at this and Nat always says I dress like an old man but -”

“Yeah, don’t be alarmed if all your plaid shirts mysteriously go missing. And are somehow found in a dumpster. That happens to be on fire,” Tony tells him, standing from the bed.

“Okay, they’re not all that bad -”

“Not all of it is bad, but that pile over there,” Tony says pointing at the heap on the floor that seems to be nothing but a pile of plaid, “you’re never gonna see those ever again. We’re not even going to look at them too long.”

Steve laughs, “I don’t even get to say goodbye?”

“Marie says we should say Thank You, but I honestly don’t know if they deserve that.”

“We should always say please and thank you Tony, no matter what,” Steve says, and Tony can’t tell how serious he’s being.

“Oh hey, what time is your date?” Tony asks, tugging at Steve’s jacket to give his hands something to do. “Are they picking you up or are you? Or are you meeting them there? And where is there, by the way? And also, who are they?

Steve laughs, then scratches the back of his neck. “Well, uh, funny thing. I haven't actually asked them yet.”

“Uh, say that again?  You just got ready for a date - which the other person is unaware is even happening in the first place?”

“Yeah. No need to repeat, seems like you got it the first time?

“Steve - who - WHAT - who does that?”

“I got too nervous to ask!” Steve says, cheeks going pink. “So I did this instead?”

“Okay. Okay, so what exactly is the plan here?” Tony asks, arms crossing. “You’re gonna - what? Show up and ask them, right then and there if they wanna go out immediately?”

“Well, the great thing is that I can just ask him right now, and if it doesn't work out, I'll just head back to my closet to change, no need to even leave the room, possibly for the foreseeable future, ever.

Tony tries not to go through the list of ‘he's’ that both Steve and him know and says, “So you’re gonna text him? Okay, great, do it.”

Steve’s stares at Tony with what can only be described as exasperation before pulling out his phone,  which, okay, if anything - Tony’s the one who’s exasperated because who even does this-

His phone vibrates in his hand.

He thinks it might just be Natasha, probably wondering why he stopped replying mid text - but it’s from Steve.

Steve, who is standing right in front of Tony, giving him a hopeful look.

Steve, who sent him a text reading, "Hey, I’m wondering if you’re free for dinner tonight? I’ve got reservations at that fancy Italian place you’ve been wanting to go to for 6.30?"

Tony thinks his heart might be beating so loud, Steve can hear it. “Steve - are you- are you asking me-?

“To be my Valentine’s? Yeah,” he says, smile on his face. He juts his chin at Tony’s phone. “You gonna give me an answer?”

Tony tosses his phone onto the bed and drags Steve down into what is, objectively, one of the best kisses in Tony’s life. Steve’s arms circle around his waist and they’re both so close together, a piece of paper wouldn’t fit between them.

“Answer clear enough for you?” Tony asks when they pull apart, because hey, breathing is a thing.

Steve grins, “Don’t know, think I need a little more clarity,” before kissing him again and Tony’s brain promptly shuts down.

♡ ♡ ♡

They don’t make it to their reservation, but Natasha does attempt to break Steve’s door down to check on Tony since he wouldn’t answer her texts. She brought the ice-cream with her.

[vikingqueer]

music recommendations because i have some thoughts™

i don't wanna be that person who's like "my music taste is so weird lol" but i find that very often most of my friends don't really care for the music i like so i thought i'd just make a long ass post about it on tumblr instead. Fair warning, I'm very passionate about MIKA and The Mechanisms and so this very quickly got VERY long because it is part of my ongoing campaign to convince people to listen to mika and the mechs.

1) MIKA in general, but especially My Name Is Michael Holbrook (2019) and No Place In Heaven (2015) (especially the Deluxe version!!)

MIKA is a kind of British singer (half Lebanese, grew up in France blabla), and you probably know him for Grace Kelly and Relax, Take It Easy from his first album Life In Cartoon Motion from 2007. He writes a lot of FUN music, interspersed with the occasional slightly sadder song, especially when looking at an album like No Place In Heaven, which contains a lot of songs with gay themes, resulting in some songs that are just a little bit ouch. He's originally classically trained and has a frankly RIDICULOUS range and idk he just writes very good pop music. Also I have so much respect for that time he talked about how a lot of pop is very fake, with like expensive cars and stilettos and mini skirts in the snow and said "Because I walk down the street, and I don't see any of that. I see fat women and gay men. I don't know... That's real". He's written 5 albums; My Name Is Michael Holbrook (2019), No Place In Heaven (2015), The Origin Of Love (2012), The Boy Who Knew Too Much (2009), and Life In Cartoon Motion (2007).

For starters, I recommend listening to Last Party, Origin Of Love, Grace Kelly, Blame It On The Girls, Blue, Happy Ending, Pick Up Off The Floor, Last Party, Underwater, Tomorrow and Tiny Love (yes this is a long list but i REALLY love MIKA). If you want a slightly broader palette that's not just my favourites, I recommend the Mika starter pack on spotify.

2) The Mechanisms. I warn you. I am making this a thing. I have been obsessed with the mechs since last march.

Boy, where to start? The Mechanisms were a British 9 member space pirate story-telling cabaret that "died" in January 2020. They rewrite songs to fit retellings of various stories. I don't even know what genre I'd describe them as, but probably folk but steam-punk?? Their 4 "main" albums are concept albums, and I honestly just recommend listening to the from beginning to end in chronological order. A good way to get into the mechs is also to listen to UDAD and then watching the live show on youtube or alternately try giving Death To The Mechanisms a listen, to get good quality live show audio of TBI and various other stuff. Also, it was streamed on YouTube and someone combined the footage with the album audio and it rocks. Really, I think the mechs' best selling points are honestly just their concept albums:

Once Upon a Time (In Space) Their first album from 2012. I'd say this is the most "easily digestible" for the general public, since it's a retelling of various fairytales. So, what if Old King Cole was in fact not merry, but rather a cold-blooded dictator, intent on colonising as much of the galaxy as possible. What if Snow White was a general, looking to avenge what King Cole did to her sister, Rose. What if Cinderella was to be wedded to Rose the day that King Cole attacked in order to kidnap Rose? But y'know, In Space and also like every other mechs album it's a beautiful tragedy. Fave songs are Old King Cole, Pump Shanty, and No Happy Ending.

Ulysses Dies at Dawn You guessed it, it's a story about Odysseus, or Ulysses because I guess Ulysses is easier to rhyme or fit in the meter or something, idk. Ulysses is a war hero of unknown gender who is said to keep something that could take down the corrupt Olympians, meanest families in the City, in a vault to which only they know the passcode. Oedipus, Heracles, Orpheus, and Ariadne have been hired by Hades, who happens to be The Mechs' quartermaster Ashes O'Reilly, to get into Ulysses' vault. I didn't care much for udad at first, but honestly it's got some real bangers and the story is really good. UDAD weirdly stands out as the only of the concept albums to not feature any gay relationships, per se. Fave songs are Riddle of the Sphinx, Favoured Son, and Underworld Blues.

High Noon over Camelot This is my favourite mehcs album. So basically, this is Arthurian legend, but it's a space western and Jonny D'Ville does a bad southern accent. This is the story of the cowboy lovers Arther, Lancelot, and Guinevere searching for the Galfridian Restricted Acces Interface Login, or GRAIL, in order to stop their world from falling into the sun. Meanwhile, Mordred and Gawaine are ruling Camelot, and Mordred has convinced Gawaine to try to establish peace with the Saxons by whom Mordred was raised, but Gawaine hates viciously. If you love getting your heart broken and songs by a fucking off the rails batshit preacher I HIGHLY recommend hnoc. Fave songs are Gunfight at the Dolorous Guard, Blood and Whiskey, and Once and Future King. Honorary mention for Hellfire because it awakens something animalistic in me.

The Bifrost Incident TBI is the frankly only good adaptation of norse mythology I've ever known of, and I say that as Dane who was literally forced to learn things about norse mythology in school because it's my heritage or whatever. I've been listening to TBI a lot lately because it's VERY good. It's definitely the most refined of the mechs' albums (because it's the newest) but also I just love a little bit of cosmic horror. 80 years ago, Odin, the All-Mother, ruler of Asgaard, launched a train through the wormhole Bifrost that would reduce the travel between Asgaard and Midgaard from 3 months to 3 days, but things didn't go quite as planned. Lyfrassir Edda of the New Midgaard Transport Police is trying to solve the case of why suddenly the train has arrived 80 years late; to figure out whether it was accident or maybe it was sabotaged by Loki, who was allegedly sentence to death her murder of Baldur, by the Midgaardian resistance led by Loki's wife Sigyn, or maybe by Thor, who was to take over after Odin, and who holds quite the grudge because he used to be a friend of Loki's. You might've heard the song Thor from this album, it's apparently quite popular. Fave songs are Loki, Ragnarok III: Strange Meeting, and Ragnarok V: End of The Line. Yet again an honorary mention: Red Signal because while Lovecraft was a bitch, his invocations are fucking RAW.

Basically, the Mechanisms do all of their performances in character as captain first mate Jonny D'Ville, quartermaster Ashes O'Reilly, pilot DrumBot Brian, master-at-arms Gunpowder Tim, science officer Raphaella la Cognizi, doctor Baron Marius Von Raum (neither a baron, nor a doctor), archivist Ivy Alexandria, engineer Nastya Rasputina, and The Toy Soldier, who is, as usual, present. You can find very obscure lore about the crew of the Aurora here, tidbits on Tales To Be Told and TTBT Vol. 2, such as One Eyed Jacks, The Ignominious Demise of Dr. Pilchard, Gunpowder Tim vs. The Moon Kaiser, Lucky Sevens, and Lost in the Cosmos.

If you feel like listening to a full 40-50 minute album to find out if you like a band is a bit much, I recommend listening to one of the mini stories Alice, Swan Song, or Frankenstein, which are about 12, 5 and 9:30 minutes respectively.

3) The Amazing Devil You know that guy who played Jaskier in the Witcher? I got into The Amazing Devil from spotify recommending them because I listened to the mechs, and apparently Joey Batey from The Amazing Devil is the same Joey Batey who was in the Witcher. Both him and Madeleine Hyland are VERY talented singers and songwriters and their second album The Horror and the Wild makes me go out into the forest and SCREAM. I listened to it on repeat for like a month straight. I guess they'd also be considered folk, but like. New Folk. Also yes, this is another British artist, I don't know why I'm like this. I've never really gotten that into their first album, Love Run, but King slaps. As I understand there's this whole lore about the Blue Furious Boy and Scarlet Scarlet, Joey and Madeleine respectively, but unlike the Mechanisms it's actually possible to find out things about the actual real people and harder to find the obscure lore? I'm open for people to please help me. Fave songs are The Horror and the Wild, Farewell Wanderlust, and That Unwanted Animal, which is literally a third of their second album, but again. I haven't really listened to Love Run that much, and I just LOVE the harmonies on THATW. (also im gay and dramatic leave me alone)

4) dodie I have so much love for this woman. Like many others, I first knew dodie as doddleoddle on youtube. I think I first stumbled across her in probably 2015, because I distinctly already knew her before she released her first EP Sick of Losing Soulmates in 2016. I think I watched probably every video she's ever made in the span of a few weeks. I just loved her quiet sound and was absolutely HOOKED. Also she's actually the reason I got into MIKA originally, so thanks for that. Dodie just realeased her first album Build A Problem (in addition to her three EP's; the one mentioned above, You, and Human) and it slaps. Yes dodie is also British Fave songs are probably Monster, Rainbow, and In The Middle.

5) Cladia Boleyn Unfortunately, Claudia Boleyn only has three singles and that's it. She's been making content on youtube for quite a while, and that's how I first discovered her. I don't know what genre her music is, but I like it. The songs are Celesta, George, and Mother Maiden Crone, of which the latter is my favourite. I'm not saying Claudia Boleyn invented women in 2017 when she released Mother Maiden Crone, but she did. Also you guessed it, Claudia Boleyn is British.

6) Hozier I'm not about to tell you about Hozier. You know who he is. Listen to Nina Cried Power, Angel Of Small Death & The Codeine Scene, and Shrike. Also Hozier isn't stricly British in that he is definitely from A British Isle, but Ireland is not part of the UK. Give me a break.

7) Oh Land Oh Land IS DANISH. I like her early music best, because I'm not that into the electronic sound. I guess Oh Land is just you regular old pop, but with the occasional weird vibe? Oddly enough, I like her first album Fauna best. Unfortunately I haven't really listened to her newest album Family Tree much, but it seems good? Fave songs are Frostbite, Love You Better and Family Tree. I cried on the bus, first time I listened to the Danish version of Love You Better, Elsker Dig Mer because my mother tongue always just hits harder. Also Frostbite is Oh Land doing a duet with herself which is pretty cool.

8) Oysterband This is a live recommendation. I mean they're a decent folk band and all, but they're a fucking experience live. If you like folk and you ever get the opportunity to see Oysterband live, do it. Unfortunately, yes. They are British. Either way, they are incredible on a scene and I think they deserve a mention for that.

9) Ben Platt Honestly don't know much about this guy, but he's not British and he was in Dear Evan Hansen. He released an album in 2019, Sing To Me Instead, and I just think it's a good album, there isn't really not much more to it. Fave songs are Grow As We Go, Bad Habit, and In Case You Don't Live Forever.

and thats all for now. this has been a ramble. shout out to you if you actually read all of this, especially the mechs part.

[hadtochangemyurlquick]

shoni for 97, 100

Rules: Send me two (2) tropes from this list + a ship and I’ll describe how I’d combine them in the same story.

Time Travel  & Accidentally Saving the Day   

i hated writing this and it took forever and then i accidentally loved it. o fuck this happened w/ the soulmate au too, i need to stop coming up with genius plots i'm too smart

Toni didn’t like working for Klein Life Lines.

Everything from the cheesy rhyming name, the Margarita Mondays #girlboss work culture, to the absolutely suffocating way Gretchen Klein’s eyes followed her wherever she went, made every day a living hell to get through.

But. It paid like gangbusters, and her coworkers were perhaps the best people she’d ever met. From Fatin always keeping vodka in her water bottle, to Nora always having the perfect joke, to Rachel constantly arguing with Toni about who was gonna foot the lunch bill, to the way Leah always seemed to be picking up on every little thing around her. She guessed Toni’s birthday, just from context clues of Toni being a little hungover one morning. Like fucking Sherlock Holmes.

They were amazing and she loved them. But they only made working there bearable. Being Gretchen Klein’s personal fucking assistant sucked fucking ass. Even if all she had to do was move things around on google calendar she was still home by midnight most nights. She wished, often, that she was like Rachel, Nora, Fatin, and Leah. They all got to work on a big research project together while Toni told Gretchen’s son that he was gonna have to switch schools again.

Well, Leah technically worked in HR but she did so much in that big fucking mystery room she was probably helping out. Apparently “going to college” was a requirement for being a scientist. If Toni’d known that she would’ve been born rich. Her bad.

So work was bad, until the evening Gretchen’s son had some sort of emergency and she ran out early, only ordering for Toni to finish all the work she had to do. Except Toni didn’t have any work to do without Gretchen, but if she left early she’d be crucified.

So she dicked around at her desk until she wandered her way into the big mystery doors where the rest of her friends had locked themselves away.

“Hey guys,” Toni poked her head in, “Gretchen peeled out early for once, mind if I annoy you guys in here?”

“Come the fuck in,” Fatin waved her over, luckily none of them were forced to wear dumb lab coats as they plugged away at their computers. In the front of the room was a large processor, it’s fan working overtime. “Gretchen the Wretched finally fucked off?”

“Something with her son,” Toni shrugged and plopped next to Fatin. “What is that?”

“Data analysis,” Rachel answered. She showed Toni her computer, the numbers flashing too quickly for Toni to read them.

“What’s it for?”

“No idea,” Leah said. “Which isn’t giving me bad vibes at all. We’re just working on some mystery project for a self-described ‘Napoleon with a cunt.’”

“Relax,” Rachel said. “We already know it’s not for world domination. Fatin ran the diagnostics.”

Fatin made eye contact with Toni and quickly shook her head.

“So, you have no idea what it’s for?” Toni asked.

“None,” Nora said.

“But there’s a big red button we are absolutely not allowed to press,” Fatin said. She nodded at a big red button on the processor.

Toni looked at it. “I’m gonna press it.”

Everyone stopped typing and looked at her.

“Absolutely not,” Rachel said.

“Do it,” Leah said.

“Toni, absolutely maybe don’t press it,” Fatin said.

“Exactly,” Nora agreed.

“I’m gonna do it.” Toni walked over to the processor and they all watched her as her hand hovered over the large button.

“Don’t do it,” Rachel said, but didn’t make a move to stop her.

Toni loved being told what to do, so obediently she walked back over to them and they all had a good laugh.

Yeah, as if.

She pressed the button and instead of the machine shutting off, or the lights flickering, or something external, all she felt was a sudden sucking in her gut as the world went dark.

She was surrounded by water, gasping for breath as she swam, not even sure which direction to go in. Water got in her lungs and an arm swung around her waist. She grasped at it desperately, struggling as her feet kicked until she broke the water line, coughing and spluttering as someone dragged her towards a shore.

They landed on a beach and Toni continued to gasp, wondering if she'd throw up from vertigo.

“What in the world were you thinking?” A woman asked, and luckily, she didn’t sound like Gretchen, her voice too southern.

Toni coughed, her knees bending in the sand. The water was fresh though, maybe a lake?

“Who even are you?” The woman continued. “You just appeared. Out of nowhere! Are you—are you an angel?” Toni rolled over in the sand, eyes catching sight of a sky, light blue in the early morning. Which made no sense, because it was nearly eight o’clock.

“What?” Toni managed.

“You’ve got to be,” The woman said. “Or a spirit sent by the devil. Which is it?”

Toni looked over at her and holy fuck this woman was beautiful, blonde and her face was sculpted, even her hair wet shone in the sun as she looked down at Toni. Toni wanted to ask if she was the angel.

She was also dressed for the renaissance fair.

“What?”

“It’s the only way you could’ve known I was gonna jump. Why else would you have saved me?” The woman asked.

“I—what?”

“When you appeared,” the woman said. “You just appeared and I jumped in after you, instead of—well instead of jumping in to—” the woman cut off abruptly and Toni put a hand over her eyes to calm her incoming migraine.

“What’s your name?” The woman asked.

“Toni,” Toni said.

“Not very angelic,” the woman said. “Not very demonic either.”

“I’m not—what—”

“My name’s Shelby,” the woman offered. “Thank you for saving me.”

“You—you saved me,” Toni said but she shook her head. “Whatever. I guess. Where are we?”

“Not far from the mountains,” Shelby said. “My family will be there by now.”

“The mountains?” Toni asked. “What fucking mountains?”

Shelby nodded her head at something beyond them and Toni sat up a little and gaped. She’d only seen the Rocky Mountains a few times but they’d be hard to fucking forget. They stood before her like a total damnation of god and science, for one moment she had her back to them in Minnesota and now they’d crept up on her, Shelby dragging her ever closer.

She looked back at Shelby’s cosplay and a bad feeling starting creeping up her throat.

“What—what’s the year?”

Shelby gave her an odd look. “May of 1837,” Shelby said. “Do you think you’ve hit your head?”

The migraine returned and Toni fell back on the sand.

Yeah, Gretchen was definitely planning world domination.

[yezielmoore]

Day 4: Baleful

Me, grinding PotD and having my head stuck there? More likely than you think! 

---

adj. foreboding or threatening evil.

“Ohhh, would you look at that?” Kaito mutters to himself, peering down the giant hole in the ground. 

If somebody were to ask him to describe what he sees his answer would probably go something along the lines of ‘foreboding and unequivocally evil. No, really, like voidsent but without the void part, kinda’. Hey! He never claimed to be a poet. Cut him some slack. 

But the Palace… (And it was honest to gods called Palace of the Dead. That was certainly an… illuminating name). Down that hole, beyond rocks and huge twisting roots, he can see the beginnings of manmade structures, cut rocks forming a crumbling path, broken columns and walls and, furthest of all, an archway. It stands eerily intact from what he can discern and it simply radiates malice.

It sends a shiver of anticipation and fear down his spine. 

Oh-ho. He guesses he can see now why the Wood Wailers around Quarrymill are so ruffled. This is just the right mix of mysterious and dangerous that speaks to adventurers of all walks of life. He’d know, adventurer that he is. Certainly explains why Quarrymill was drowning in eager youths with more boldness than sense and a thirst for recognition or money or both when he teleported in.  

He rights himself and walks back a few steps until he’s back with his guide. He puts a fist on his hips and cocks his head towards the man, light amusement dragging his lips into a smirk.  

“So,” he says, “how many adventurers have gone down there?” Kaito asks innocently. Not innocently enough, if the dirty look the blue haired man sends him is any indication. 

The Wood Wailer Expeditionary heaves a long down-out sigh, as if everything in the world was conspiring against him in order to make his life difficult, Kaito most of all. Rude.  

“Far, far too many.”

Kaito ‘mmms’ out loud, having expected that answer. An ever changing, unexplored, rewarding challenge like this? Yes, Kaito is not surprised that every adventurer and their chocobo is literally lining up for it. Because nothing about this screams TRAP and SUSPICIOUS and DEADLY, not at all.  

But that left the other matter… 

“And how many have returned?” 

This time the sigh is mournful, “...Far too few,” the man says, tired and vaguely sad, in that way you may get for complete strangers you met once and the next news you receive about them is a death notification. Less than that realistically. 

‘Yeah, that also checks out’, thinks Kaito, mind malms away. 

And then he shakes himself and proceeds to make sure he has everything he could possibly need for a long trek into the unknown. He starts by disabling his linkshell, because of course he does. He can’t help but think that this probably isn’t what Minfilia meant for him to do when she asked him to take a break after the whole Praetorium mess. But what else is he supposed to do? Sunbath in Costa del Sol? Gamble in the Golden Saucer? He’d be bored to death in a day AND poor(er) to boot.

The expeditioner looks on as the adventurer checks his armor and axe (irrelevant, the strange environment inside the Palace would reset those attributes upon entry) and then proceeds to take inventory of the small store that is apparently contained in his bag. He’s well stocked if nothing else. 

“You should really bring a party with you,” he almost begs, trying once more to make the adventurer see sense, futile as such a thing usually is. It’s the whole reason why he came all the way to the entrance when in reality he just needs to write down a name. However, adventurers and common sense seem to be mutually exclusive, as demonstrated by the smirk the man sends his way and his parting words:

“Now, where would be the fun in that?”

The expeditioner sighs and takes off his mask to rub at his eyes, mentally adding ‘Kaito Seaborn’ to the list of the Lost. It’s simply easier to scratch out the name of a miraculous survivor than the reverse really. 

The name is vaguely familiar if foreign. Definitely not gridanian. He wonders where he could have heard it.