#also as i said before i need to edit it girl into that clip o fhim walking bcs GOD DAMN

[skitskatdacat63]

2023 Brazilian Grand Prix - Qualifying - Lance Stroll

[ravenbrenna09]

ideal seizoen vier: episode vijf

main: Moyo Makadi

clip one (zaterdag): on saturday afternoon, moyo is trying to focus on homework. all of a sudden, he glances up at the clock and realizes what time it is. he quickly goes to get ready and izzy, his little brother with who moyo shares a room, asks where he’s going. moyo says that he has to go to work but promises that he’ll be home later that evening. as moyo finishes getting ready for work, he swings by the kitchen to grab something for dinner to find his mom at the kitchen counter, looking over bills. moyo asks if everything is okay to which his mom nods and admits that money is looking a little tight this week. when she realizes that moyo is hovering, she quickly tells him not to worry about it and tells him to have a good evening at work. moyo nods his head and promises that he’ll be home in a few hours. 

clip two (zaterdag): moyo arrives home later than expected and finds izzy asleep on the couch in the living room. his mom is reading a book in the arm chair and smiles up at him. she tells moyo that izzy tried to wait up for him but passed out soon after he made the commitment to. moyo chuckles to himself, picking up izzy and taking him to their room. after tucking izzy into bed, moyo heads into the kitchen to make some food and his mom follows him, asking if his coworker who got sick is okay. moyo says that they were, just that he had a stomach bug or something, plus moyo got a few extra hours in and got some more money. his mom chuckles and says that it’s always good. as his food is being heated up, his mom says that she is going to have an overnight shift at the hospital on monday evening because someone is unable to cover and moyo says that he’ll make sure to watch izzy. his mom nods, thanking him before promising that she’ll be careful at the hospital. his mother kisses his cheek before his mom heads to bed and tells him to get some rest. 

clip three (zondag): while his mom and izzy are out for the day to hang out together with his mom going to work the next day, moyo heads out to the skate park to meet up with the boys like they all promised. as he approaches, he hears the sound of all of his friends laughing and looks up to find them lounging around in front of the mural. as moyo approaches the three of them, the other boys greet him happily. alongside the broerrrs, sander are also there and he high fives moyo even as robbe’s sprawled against his chest. as moyo sits down with them, jens asks moyo if he’s seen their latest video was doing and moyo admits that he hasn’t looked at it. aaron complains, saying it was their biggest one yet, and sander laughs, commenting robbe on his editing skills, but moyo shrugs and says that he’s been focused on homework. jens admits that their bio assignment has been brutal and robbe offers to help if he needs it. moyo thanks him. jens starts questioning when they should plan their next vlog. aaron suggests that they can have a brainstorming session tomorrow and moyo comments that he can’t tomorrow because he’s got to be home with his brother for the evening. instead, they make plans to brainstorm on tuesday.

clip four (maandag): after school on monday, moyo says goodbye to the boys in the courtyard and heads over to izzy’s school. as he’s waiting for his brother, music pounding in his ears, moyo scrolls through the comments about their latest video. as he’s scrolling through, he gets a text message from his manager. his manager comments about how moyo had asked for more hours and how a shift had opened up because someone called in. he asks if moyo could possibly cover a shift. moyo texts him back that he can’t, saying that he’s watching his brother, but thanks him for thinking of him. after he sends the message, he feels someone tap on his shoulder and glances up to find keisha, one of the girls in his year. moyo pulls off his headphones as she asks him about what’s he’s doing at the primary school. moyo smiles and says that he’s picking up his little brother and asks what she’s doing here. keisha said that her brother also goes to this school. the two of them talk about one of their shared classes until izzy comes out. izzy introduces himself to keisha who says hello to him. izzy asks how keisha knows moyo and moyo tells him that they go to school together. keisha wishes them a good day before moving towards another boy who looks to be the same age as izzy. moyo takes izzy’s hand and the two of them head home with moyo glancing back towards keisha who is talking with her brother by the school. 

clip five (dinsdag): during their break, the boys are talking with the girls about possible ideas for their next vlogs. when luca suggests another makeup one, jens groans, commenting how long it had taken to get robbe’s poor attempt of winged eyeliner off. yasmina says that’s why the girls need to do it so they can show them how it’s done and zoë says that if they do it, she wants to be the one to do robbe’s makeup. robbe says that he’s not in the video and zoë says that she’s sure one of the boys or sander will take over the camera. aaron offers that they could always do a waterski activity and moyo groans which causes robbe to giggle. moyo states that it is a good thing that robbe is behind the camera because he would easily school all of them in it. this causes the group to laugh before jens suggests another idea. as the group of them are talking, moyo notices keisha across the courtyard with a handful of her friends. keisha glances up and spots moyo and waves which moyo waves back. he turns back to his friends and joins in on the conversation. 

clip six (dinsdag): after school, moyo heads to pick up izzy again—because his mother is at home cleaning and moyo needs to head home soon to change for work. as he’s walking, someone walks up to him and he turns to find keisha, who asks if he’s picking up izzy again. moyo says he is and questions what’s keisha’s brother’s name is. when keisha tells him that her brother’s name is theo, moyo realizes that her brother is close with his as izzy is always talking about his friend theo and keisha chuckles at the happy coincidence. the two of them talk about their brothers and how important they are to them as they walk. once they arrive at the school to wait, keisha asks moyo if he might want to come with her and theo to the park to hang out. she says that moyo could bring izzy if he wants to come. while moyo is tempted to accept the offer, especially because izzy would want to spend time with theo, moyo has to decline because he has work later that day. keisha understands commenting about a next time and moyo agrees. their brothers come out and they part ways. 

social media content: moyo posts a video of a dance, tagging robbe as the filmer and indicates that it’s a past dance between takes of their last vlogs. keisha comments about his dance moves and it’s taken as vaguely flirtatious.  

clip seven (woensdag): at work, moyo takes a break and sits in the back to eat his dinner. he’s shown to be texting keisha, commenting about how he’s finally able to sit down. as the two of them talk back and forth, the small grin on moyo’s face becomes increasingly wider. however, a little abruptly, his manager comes up and questions how he’s doing. moyo is confused. his manager says that he wants to make sure that he’s not overworking himself too hard because if moyo pushes himself too hard, he’s going to burn out. moyo says that he’s doing okay and his manager asks about his studies, saying that he needs to focus on those especially since it’s his last year. moyo nods, promising that he’s focused on his studies. he just says that he also needs to work a little more and get more money so he could help out his mom. his manager nods and says that he understands, but he promises moyo to tell him as soon as he’s starting to feel burnt-out or overworked. moyo promises and his manager walks off, letting him get back to his dinner.

clip eight (donderdag): izzy is out at a friend’s house to hang out with his friend so moyo is taking advantage of the solitude to work on some homework. as he’s working, his mom comes home to find him sitting in the living room. his mom sits down on the couch beside him and asks him what he’s working on. after a few minutes of small talk, they fall into a peaceful silence with moyo’s mom running a hand through his curls. finally, moyo turns to her and says that he can help with money. when his mom gives him a confused look, he explains. he says that he knows that money has been tight for them recently and says that he has been trying to get a few more shifts at the restaurant and that his upcoming check should have a little extra money on it so he could help out with the bills. his mom shakes her head promising that moyo doesn’t have to worry about it but moyo says that he wants to help her. his mom says that he is helping her by focusing on his studies, getting ready for uni next year, and taking care of izzy when she’s at work. she says that she knows that money has been a little tight in the past month or two but they have food on the table and she has her medicine and they’re okay. moyo nods, growing quiet, and his mom says that she knows that his father always told him to be strong and be head of the house, but he doesn’t have to be. she wants moyo to live his life and focus on the school year. moyo nods and for a minute, they’re quiet again. moyo says that he’ll try not to worry about it but says that he’ll help if she wants him to. his mom nods and promises that if she does need help, she’ll ask him for the help that she needs. moyo smiles and sits on the couch to hug his mom tightly. 

clip nine (vrijdag): moyo is sitting at the park waiting to meet up with the boys for the filming of their latest vlog. he’s got music pounding in his ears and he’s typing out a text to his mom about meeting up with the boys. as his mother sends back a response about having fun, a shadow passes over him and he looks up to find keisha sitting down next to him. the two of them talk for a brief moment about school before she asks if everything is okay, commenting about the serious look that was on his face. for a second, moyo hesitates but he ends up telling her about how money has been tight for his family lately and how he’s been picking up more shifts to try and help out. his mom told him not to worry about it, but moyo wishes that he could help her out more. keisha nods, saying that she understands. she explains that her dad got unexpectedly laid off but that they got through it. she says that it was hard for a few months—for all of them—and keisha admits that she wished that she was able to do more, but her mom would ask her for help with little things such as cooking dinner or cleaning up or taking care of theo after school. even though they were little things, keisha admits that she felt helpful to help her mom. moyo nods and thanks her. keisha smiles, promising that it’ll be okay. unexpectedly, the rest of the boys show up and ask if he’s ready to film. keisha asks what they’re filming and aaron enthusiastically tells her the idea they came up with on tuesday. keisha chuckles, wishing him luck. moyo comments about how much he’s going to embarrass himself and robbe says that’s the point which only causes keisha to laugh harder. keisha asks if she can come see and robbe says the more the merrier. moyo groans but is grinning as the two of them hop off the bench and head off to film the next vlog. 

extra social media content: moyo posts a picture with keisha (tagged) about having a new vlog filmed and ready to go. he tags sander as the photographer and robbe & sander are “fighting” over who is the better photographer in the comments. 

[writingsofmyimagination]

Believer

Yoo Kihyun x Reader

Rating:18+

Summary: Honestly the video and the Believer cover killed me so enjoy some PWP based around it! 

Warnings: Shameless PWP (Slight BDSM themes (Dom Kihyun OFC), nothing to extreme - Toys, edging, denial, over-stimulation)

On editing actually decided I didn’t like this but it’s all done now :P

//

The music was throbbing through your ear pods, the bass unconsciously in sync with your steps up the stairs. The bass which you hoped would also drown out the throb between your legs. The throb which had been damn near constant for days. Literally.

Yoo fucking Kihyun.

//

It’s been about a week since he released the cover of Imagine Dragons Believer. It’s been a week since you made the HUGE mistake of telling him it drove you mad watching him feel himself through the music like that. Kihyun wasn’t due at your place until tomorrow but you were too desperate and sought to tempt fate.

-So what did you think?”-16:03

-You hit it right out of the park obviously! -

-Yeah?-

-Yeah it was amazing. I’d also be lying if I said It didn’t make me want to fuck you so bad right now-

-And what a shame you won’t be seeing me for a week :P-

You pictured the smug first that would have been plastered on his face. Stroking his already inflated ego always put you first class to tortureville.

-What can we do to help my princess get through the week then?- he’d added

-Come over or leave me alone- you’d offered as the lemon green tea doused your throat while smothered in your blankets on your sofa.

-It’s going to be more fun because I’m doing neither…-

Before you’d even finished reading the message you knew whatever you were going to get was THAT Kihyun. The Kihyun that totally consumed. The Kihyun that was so in control you’d do anything he asked because the alternative was much worse. Even if he wasn’t there. You’d rubbed your thighs together, tongue wetting your lips.

-…You’re going to touch yourself for me. Get yourself all worked up for me and I want you to show me –

You read those words in the way his devilish lips would have whispered if he were there. You’d sat up eagerly before replying.

-Want me to cum for you?-

- Definitely not! that’s reserved for me –

God if he could the pout on your face you’d be straight over the table ass out counting how many strikes to your ass you were going to get

-You fucking serious? I’m not seeing you for daaayyyss – You shot back accompanied with an army of sad faces.

-I never specified who it was going to be most fun for. But for that attitude you’re going to do it every day for me. Make sure you record your frustrated whines at the end. I want to hear how desperate you get.-

You cursed yourself and him a thousand times as you took yourself to the bedroom.

-I know you’re a good girl and you’ll do what your told-

You refused to reply and sent the videos to him.

//

Today was day six, to say you were irritable was an understatement. You’d not sent anything to him today. Tempting fate.

Jooheon was the one to let you into the dorm. Apparently catching him mid food prep; a spatula gripped in his free hand. His movements stopped dead. Eyes grew wide as his brain fought to find something he’d likely forgotten.

“Nothing was planned, chill. This is a surprise Kihyun when he gets in kind of thing” His shoulders dropped.

“Thank god my brain just panicked I’d not put enough food in. On that note though have you eaten? Want me to make you something?

“No thanks. But I do have a small favour to ask though” eyes on the floor observing the converse slip past your heels.

“Sure what’s up?” You took a quick gauge of the room. Minhyuk gave you a quick soft smile and nod before his eyes flew back to the large plasma screen to focus on holding his lead against Hyungwon in whatever overwatch thing was going on. Hyungwon’s eyes briefly acknowledged you but he was too busy squealing and wincing.

“Can you guys make yourself scarce for like ten minutes when he gets back pllleeeaaassseee”

You were responded with a blank, processing look on his face. Changkyun ending up startling Jooheon as he looped his arms round his neck. You don’t know what it is about him but this guy always knows when you’re up to no good. It’s like he knows you’ve got your lacy lingerie set with suspenders on underneath you red and black polka dot dress as well.

“I’ve got this, don’t worry” he stated winking in your direction. You could only roll your eyes amused, bringing your hands into a prayer to him.

“Guys! Let’s go! None of us wanna see when Ki gets surprised” The boys on the sofa fumbled up grabbing their crinkling packets of crisps wordlessly agreeing with Changkyun.

“Thank you soooo much guys, love you” you called after them as they disappeared into their rooms. You checked your phone, you had around ten minutes until Kihyun would be home from the studio. The artificial light of the teardrop lighting had become more prominent as the evening sun descended beneath the blocky skyline of Seoul; purple pastels separated by an orange hue.

You unhooked each button down the front of your dress. You boosted yourself up using the bar style stools to hoist you up to sitting on the marble breakfast island. You were not leaving until you got what you needed tonight and that was absolute in your mind.

It took a few long minutes for the harsh coolness of the marble to regulate to the body temperature of your behind. Phone in your hand aimlessly scrolling through your feed until Ki’s face bubble over took the screen.

“Can I help you” you immediately chimed

“Hey baby, yes you can I’m just getting ho...

His phone barely gripped in his hands. Eyes fixed on the shock on his kitchen side. The words he was going to speak completely strangled out in his throat. He was met with your silence. The misbehaviour screaming in your eyes, lip between your teeth.

“Where are the others?” his words were hesitant, eyes rushing around the room multiple times. He might be … but he was damn private when it came to you; he would not have any of the boys SEE you as you were now. Hear you, I mean he made it a damn point to have you crying him name so they could hear sometimes.

“Making themselves scarce for ten minutes so I can surprise you”

“Yeah?” His bag dropped at his feet, he’d snaked his was over to you zoning in to only you. His fingertips gentle in their dance up your thighs now either side of him.

“Well consider me surprised” he smirked through a kiss.

“Off!” He tapped at your thigh.

The second your feet found stability on the floor, you’d been spun. Stomach pressed to the cold side by a hand at your mid back, other hand trailing upwards in between your legs.

The frustrated exhale swept passed your lips dragging the corner of his up when his hands skipped out at the apex of your thighs gripping at your hips instead.

“Don’t think I don’t know what you’re doing princess” his hand slid further up your back to grip into your hair and tug.

“Teasing me into giving you what you want. You still have one more video to make before you get anything from me. So if I were you I’d go to my room put on your collar and wait for me” He pressed a kiss at your shoulder that lingered through the goose bumps. Your bodies moulded together in a final heated kiss before you waltzed off to the bedroom.

Kihyun’s stare held you in permanent unseen restraints. He’d shoved his arm chair to the bottom of the bed, and plonked himself down legs splayed. The top three buttons of his shirt undone hand cradling a camera lense, eagerly waiting in your direction.

Kihyun wasn’t satisfied with just the collar, he’d clipped a metal bar to the O-ring of your collar. Matching cuffs had been strapped to your wrists and clipped onto the end of the bar running vertically down your body. There was some leeway with the chains from your cuffs; not much but enough your hands could dip between your legs.

//

“You’re so beautiful. God it’s hard for me not just to come and fuck you like that” he cooed. The pulsing of the recording red light blurring in your vision as your eyes rolled back.

“Ki..hyun please” You whimpered, nerves igniting at the thought of him giving in to you finally.

“Dinner be ready in 5 guys” Jooheon’s voice echoed through the dorm.

“That’s enough baby. Now I need that mouth of yours before we can leave this room. KNEES!”

You were not going to refuse that tone.

His finger licked under your chin angling it upwards. The camera still gripped in his hand, lens momentarily facing away. He stole a sweet kiss, his lips plump and full against yours.

“I really missed you baby, please tell me you’re staying tonight” the sucrose heavy wrapped in his words, the caramelised glint in his blown-out pupils dancing.

“Mmmhmm” you nodded innocent, despite him being hard in front of your face. His eyes had melted to a softer chocolate fondue.

“Good, you’ll be too tired to leave when I’m finished with you”

“Now show me how much I made you want me”

He decided to keep the camera off, there is no way his hands could have maintained any type of composure. His hands were tightly balled fists in your hair. The deep breathless moans seeping past his pursed lips only kept your core vibrating furiously

//

There were many knowing smirky looks while the boy ate. Every time you pressed your thighs together that bit tighter. Every time he purposely had his hand just that tiny bit too high on your thigh. Every time he whispered to you how bad he needed to feel how wet you were and how he could make It worse. Inside your core was screaming but you physically responded backhanding him wherever you could reach. Obviously, the boys joked and scolded you; this only had Kihyun erupting into more giggles knowing full well you couldn’t defend yourself and say why.

Asshole

With that said you couldn’t quite call yourself the innocent party; sitting on his lap; minutely gyrating your hips earned you many harsh sly squeezes and warning stares.

With the bedroom door finally shut, it took Kihyun mere seconds to rid you of his white tee and joggers. You were already whimpering, desperate putty in his hands.

“Think you’ve waited long enough for me?” Kihyun cooed as you melted underneath his sweltering presence into the mattress.

“See how much longer you can wait” he shot in before you could answer. His hands not reaching you once, they stayed firmly either side of you; only his lips and nose grazed your skin. He knew you disapproved by the way you shifted on the sheets, his lips only curled up into a smirk on your chest before taking a firm bite. The sting had you squirming under him, at least the blossoming red will be coverable with clothes

Makes a change

The tip of his nose traced down your stomach in lazy patterns, every warm breathe fanning a new wave of goose bumps.

“Ki…please!” The nips and breaths on your thigh became way too overwhelming.

“Sorry princess” His head hovered over your core lowing air. You shuddered with an irritated groan.

“Sensitive, are we? A week of not being able to cum. Too much for you when you know I’m here Dying to fuck you?”

“Do you even have to ask” you breathed exasperated. Kihyun’s teasing was merciless at the best of times. He’d always have a flurry of cursing thrown his way.

“Now now, don’t make me keep you waiting any longer” blowing again, your body tensed holding on to every bit of sanity it could muster.

“Say please once more and I promise I’ll let you cum…”

Jesus Christ

“On one condition”

“Ugghh anything!” You would have sold your soul at this point. Your complaint caused a light laugh as he looked up from between your legs.

“I get to hear cry out my name? Your videos have drove me crazy this week, I want you so fucked out”

In his pause waiting for you to respond he stripped himself of his shirt. Finally. He necked half a glass of water before dipping back down between your legs. Eyes completely absorbing every ripple of his biceps and shoulder muscles until he’d positioned himself. With the guys preparing for a comeback he was at the gym more and no matter what he did most of the tone ended up being held in his shoulders and after a week of frustration you were entranced to say the least.

Your vision knocked off kilter.

“Shit!” You’d neglected to notice the amount of ice Kihyun had purposely put in his glass. Breathe was swiftly hijack from your chest. The ball of his metal tongue bar still ice cold pressed to your clit had your knuckles brimming white in the sheets, air forcing out through pursed lips. The fatal concoction of the cooled metal and the warmth of his mouth kicking the volume of your shocked moans to way too audible.

“Fuck you sound sexy but you’ve got to be quieter than that, I don’t want to gag you” He bobbed up gulping another mouthful, you could swear you heard even more crunching on ice. Wrists growing tighter in preparation.

//

“Is that good baby? Need to cum yet?”

As if your whines and writhing didn’t tell him this.

“Beg for it and you can have it” he cooed, chin glistening with you. Lips making there way up to yours at an agonisingly slow pace. Each hot kiss strong, liquidated with need. He found the taste between your thigh all too hard to pull himself away from.

“Beg” he asked again through a kiss you struggled to not cry through.

“Kihy…un please, I need you, jesus..Ki…please” whining with a fervent urgency.

“Oh I know you can do better than that princess” he goaded fingers hovering over the desperate core moments from sending those shockwaves you so badly needed.

“Fuck I swear… please let me cum, I’ve needed you so bad, please I’ve been craving your cock all week. Give it to me…I can’t…”

“Better, oh you know I’ll give it to you baby, but you can give this to me first” Your back arched to a perfect crescent, feeling his fingers stroke the front of your walls, that precious velvet goldmine.

Your neck peaked in front of him head rolled back into the sheets. His lips clamping down on you, hot pants fanning a hot breeze across your neck. Palm firm against your core.

“Fu…” your words grew silent. The pressure remaining firm sending longed out waves as the aftershocks started throbbing through your nerves. A growl rolled around his throat, his hips rolling against nothing. He was starting to feel desperate, aching for you.

“God I’ve never needed you so fucking much” he panted into your neck. Tracing his fingers through the mess he’d created. His bottom lip disappeared between his teeth; dangerous eyes ravenous for more of you. Your body still recalibrating back down to the earth gave him no response.

“Are you still going to be a good girl for me a few more times?”

“Mmm I wanna be” you shuffled pressure at his hips, his knee pressed against your core allowing you to circle your hips against him. Your hands raced to his belt, fumbling the buckles undone. You needed him out of those tight jeans.

“Needy much” he teased, a small grunt of relief when the tight denim was dropped to the floor. He climbed back on the bed climbing past you to sit against the backboard. Rolling on your front to follow his presence.

“Come and sit on my thigh baby girl” A small pout formed on your lips.

“You think I’d give you my cock that easy huh? Not until your shaking with tears in your eyes”

“Mmm” you hummed your throbbing clit now pressed to his thigh. Both hands resting a loose grip either side of his neck.

“And don’t act like this isn’t one of your favourite things. Use me like the desperate princess I’ve made you”

“Do I get to touch you?” Ghost like touches trickled down his chest underneath the rapid barely controlled movements of his breathing. Doe eyes pleading against his blown eyes that struggled to lift from the shine glistening on his leg.

“Only until I tell you to stop” Your hand had already teased beneath the elastic of his boxers.

“Ugh” God the way the veins in his neck twitched as his head rolled back against the wall. Your hips angled onto his tensed thigh. His grip loosened around the wrist of the hand sliding down his shaft when he’d decided on the pace that wouldn’t shove him off the edge.

“You sound just as pretty with my hand round your dick as when you sing” your breathes mixing, perspirated foreheads pressed together both focused eyes down. You’re hips ground harder, hand speed moving in proportion.

“Tch… stop” Kihyun choked gripping at your wrist again. He guided your hand to the meet the other at the back of his neck.

“Focus on you, I wanna watch you fall apart” He pressed at your chest, straightening your back leaning back. His hand trailing your skin, each fingertip curving round your breasts taking every inch of skin to a heightened state.

“Don’t stop princess, you’re so beautiful. Cum for me baby” He shoved his hands down onto your hips pushing down as your head and arms fell forward onto him. He shoved his hand to the back of your head pushing you into a kiss to keep the moans ravaging out of the room as your muscles pulsed sweetly.

“Mmm I could watch that all day” Kihyun cooed kissing you with a sweetness worthy of diabetes. Your head swirling in climatic bliss. He sat up, maneuverer you beneath him. Your hands default dropping to either side of your head.

“Are you joking?” You panted soul packing up good and ready to leave. The devil stood tall in front of you, smirking down, eyes dark.

“I want one more” his fingers drummed against your wand that you were sure you were about to regret leaving at his.

“Now you have a choice, either I can hold it until your begging me to stop or you can?”

“You hold it”

“Pleeasssee” you added.

“Anything for you”

//

The vibrations had you whining, tears pricking at the side of your ears. Sensitivity hijacking every single nerve ending at your core. Kihyun’s head buried in your neck, low moans fanning your neck as your cries only made him strain harder to not buck into you.

“Colour?” Kihyun asked, his weight not allowing you to move, wand still harshly pressed to you. Your muscles drained of energy, the forced convulsions post climax forcing them to run past empty.

“Yel..low” you whimpered. He showed mercy freeing you of stimulation. He thumbed the corner of your eyes, the clear droplets chased its way over his knuckles.

“Had enough of me yet?” he breathed between gentle kisses down your body, a sweet trail of plump lips.

“Mmmm” you hummed not even in response more a noise of waning bliss.

“So you don’t want my cock after all your whining this week?” Eyes shooting open

“I do, Ki…please I’ve needed you soo bad” your body running on pure desperation.

“And just think all because I released a cover video”

“Roll over ass up add bits!” he ordered. You just about pumped enough strength into your muscles to obey.

“Here baby, save your energy” He rolled up a couple of pillows and plumped them under your stomach. The caramel chocolate of his voice melted and gooey.

“I’ll go slow baby”

You knew this was for him as well as you. He thrived on working you up to the point he’d be painfully on edge without even having you. He needed enough left to shove you into bliss once more with him.

Noise was no longer a concern, all you had left was breathless pants and groans.

“I never wanna believe how good you feel” Kihyun managed choking through his words, his hips light in their juts into you. Hips controlled by his hands secured at your hips, your head rolling hard into the mattress. Colour draining from your knuckles attempting to blend into the white sheets scrunched around them. The slow ascent torturous as it was sweet.

“Baby….” You choked.

“Mmm”

“Please go faster” you whined, the slow build up in your muscles was aching every fibre past the point you could cope.

“Why’s that princess?” Kihyun slowed his hips the demon.

“Want to…cum…please”

“You know you can’t be quiet when I fuck you like that” …

“Don’t…care…gag me” you managing panting through pursed lips. His hips stuttered in approval, a growl vibrating in his throat.

“Well… how can I refuse”

“Ugh” you both groaned in unison, disapproving of the emptiness you both felt.

Silicone ball consuming the inside of your mouth, leather taut across your cheek.

“Look at me baby” You were cross legged pillows hugged at your chest. Longing glazed over eyes looking up at him, hair fallen over your face. The red tinted skin around your eyes proof of your complete undoing.

“You are soo pretty like this, my fucked out good girl… Get back with your ass up” Thank god you were gagged. The now muffled squeal would have certainly drawn attention from the dorm. He spared no energy going easy on you, his hips snapping into you.

“Is this what you wanted? …Want you to cum with me, Okay!” Your nod into the mattress was not seen, your okay signal with your hands was. Your right hand flew to the side of his thigh, red crescents soon dented in his skin.

“Close baby?” You were falling apart quicker than hips could keep up.

“Fuck, keep doing that” hips slowing when you pulsed your walls around him.

“Mmm like that… okay…baby ready?” He didn’t need your hand signal, your body stiffened. Your concentration holding on to his ever-becoming sporadic hip thrusts. You waited for his delectable deep as fuck low groan and his body to still before you let the last wave of muscle spasms ravage your muscles of every last contraction. Long drawn out pulses drawing more water to your eyes, teeth gripping harder on the rubber.

The perspiration suddenly felt warmer under his palm curving round your behind, squeezing harshly. He half collapsed, more of his skin fusing across your back for a beat before completely falling onto the bed. You fell beside him, the ability to formulate words was still beyond you. Kihyun rolled to face you snuggling a kiss into your neck.

“Want a bath beautiful?” asking while stroking the peak curve of your hips where his fingers had been planted. As the oxytocin fled your system the soreness from the bruises that would surely blossom over the next few days nudged your skin.

“I’ve still got a couple of your fave bath bombs, and I’ll bring you some Vodka aaannnnnnd I’ll maybe even make you breakfast in the morning”

“Babe I’m going to need dinner by the time my body will work enough to leave the bed” you whined dramatically.

“But yes, love yooouu” you added, ridiculous accomplished smirk wreaking havoc on his face as the buckle of his belt secure the trouser back round his hips.

[seven-seas-of-taylor]

temporary fix | ben hardy x reader

a/n: this has been in my drafts for quite some time now,, and i wanted to post it :3 i pROMISE ILL MAKE SOMETHING SOON, i just want to make it perfect :) also, based on a song called “temporary fix” by one direction, hope u like this :)

MASTERLIST

warning/s: swearing, almost has smut but there’s none

word count: 2.2k

EDITED

saw your body language and i know how you’re feeling

you look like the type of girl who’s tired of speaking

standing with somebody but he doesn’t know what you like

“here, you want some?” your boyfriend james offered you some salad, but you shook your head.

“no, thanks.” you sighed and rest your chin on your hand.

this date is so boring.

“what do you want, hm? do you want me to order some steak for you?”

he doesn’t even know what you like!

“no. i want to go home.” you wanted to say the last sentence but you knew your boyfriend would get mad and all, so you didn’t.

you caught my attention, you were looking at me first

saw that i could teach you, waking up in my t-shirt

if your not hooked on anything, right now i can be your vice

ben looked around the restaurant and locked eyes with a girl. with you.

you looked away from his gaze, embarrassed but he was smirking.

“mate, you okay? why the hell are you smirking like that?” joe asked, raising his eyebrow.

“oh. nothing.”

you look hot in your dress, but you’d totally look hotter wearing his t-shirt.

he also noticed you were getting bored with that man. you stood up and excused yourself to go to the washroom.

“i’ll just go to the washroom joe, i’ll be back.” he stood up and walked away.

“hey, wai-“

so he followed you and tapped your shoulder. “hey...”

“o-oh, hi.” you were not expecting this guy to come up to you, especially when he’s a freaking actor.

“here’s my number. call me if you’re bored or something... we can hang out. by the way i’m sure you probably know me by the look on your face..?” he smiled and gave you a paper which has his number.

“(y/n).” you smiled back.

“so, see you, (y/n)?” he smiled again before walking away.

all you need to know is

you can call me

when you're lonely

when you can't sleep

i’ll be your temporary fix

you control me, even if it's just tonight

you thought about calling ben. you couldn’t sleep, and you were alone in bed.

your boyfriend james was away to god knows where, but you could care less.

so you reached for the nightstand to get your phone and dialed ben’s number, which you memorized not long ago.

you waited for him to pick it up, putting your phone to your ear.

“hello?”

“h-hi ben, it’s me (y/n).” you were nervous and you don’t know why.

“oh, (y/n). how are you?”

“i’m good,” you smiled. “i just couldn’t sleep and i’m alone.”

the whole night was spent by you two talking about your lives. you learned alot from him, about his life.

“goodnight (y/n).” you heard him say before drifting off to sleep.

you can call me

when you feel like

i’m your good time

i’ll be your temporary fix

you can own me, and we'll call this what you like

let me be your good night

“i saw your missed call.” james’ voice boomed. “who the fuck is ben?”

you rolled your eyes. “no one. he’s just my friend, james.”

“a friend?!” he breathed in. “i know you have been talking to him these past weeks.”

oh my god, this is unbelievable.

“w-we haven’t even met up! what the hell are you talking about?”

“so you’re planning to meet up with him?”

“so what if i am? we’re just friends. nothing more.”

he glared at you. “you know what? if you’re gonna be like that, then leave.”

“fine.” you grabbed your purse, got out, then slammed the door.

how could he?

you proceeded to the cafe since it was 12 am and your boyfriend just locked you out, plus you were sleepy so you needed coffee.

ben...

you dialed ben’s number and not even in 5 seconds, he picked it up. “what’s up (y/n)?”

“i-i need you.” you sobbed. “please...”

“alright, where are you?”

“the cafe near the restaurant we met a few weeks ago.”

the night is on your lips and i feel like i’m locked in

there’s a million eyes, i don't care if they're watching

your body is saying everything

i don't have to read your mind

ben arrived at the cafe where you were staying at. he sat on a chair, facing you.

“you look sleepy.” he stated, and you let out a dry chuckle.

“heh. i am.” you yawned. “and i have nooowhere to go. my boyfriend locked me out of the apartment because we fought.”

he gasped softly. “what? i’m taking you to my flat.”

your eyes went big as saucers. “what? no! i mean.. is it okay..?”

he let out a laugh. “of course. now come on, let’s go.”

you two went out of the cafe, and you shivered. “i fucking forgot my jacket. oh my go-“

“here.” he removed his jacket, exposing his white t-shirt. he put it around your shoulders, and warmth engulfed your figure.

“t-thank you.” your lips curled up into a smile. speaking of your lips, he was staring at it.

oh how he wants his lips to yours, just as much as you want your lips to his.

so he went in for a kiss. it was soft, yet so passionate. he could care less about the eyes watching them. all he cares about right now is you.

feel you on my neck while i’m calling a taxi

climbing over me while i climb in the backseat

now we're taking off

now we're taking it off tonight

you pulled away slowly, and look into his eyes. “b-ben...”

“i’ll be your temporary fix.” he smiled bitterly.

you rest your head on his neck, while he calls a taxi.

him? temporary fix?

well, you guess there’s nothing wrong with him being a temporary fix. besides, it’s just temporary.

the taxi arrived, so you two climbed in the backseat. ben gave his address to the driver, and you climbed on top of him, sleepy.

“go sleep, angel.” he spoke with a soft voice, not long before you drifted to sleep.

all you need to know is

you can call me

when you're lonely

when you can't sleep

i’ll be your temporary fix

you control me, even if it's just tonight

you woke up because of ben’s alarm, so you fluttered your eyes open to see yourself in his arms, and he was shirtless.

“u-uh, ben...” you called out softly, but then you noticed his sleeping figure.

he’s so peaceful...

his eyes fluttered open and went to grab his phone, turning off the alarm.

he yawned, and smiled. “good morning love, how’s your sleep?”

“fine.” you smiled back.

there was a few seconds of silence, until he spoke up. “(y/n)... uh...”

“what?”

“i need help...” he pointed down his...‘down there’. “well, my little buddy needs help...”

his morning wood.

your eyes widened as you lay there, stunned.

uh oh.

should you really do it? after what he had done for you—let you sleep in his house, took care of you, you think he deserves it.

“l-look, if you don’t wan-“

“it’s okay!” you laughed awkwardly. “it’s okay...”

he pulled you to his lap, and kissed you hungrily. you kissed back almost immediately as his hands roamed around your body, then slipping his hand under your shirt and stopping at your bra clip.

“may i?” you nodded at his question, continuing to kiss him.

you can call me

when you feel like

i’m your good time

i’ll be your temporary fix

you can own me, and we'll call this what you like

let me be your good night

after that steamy morning, you both ate breakfast.

and honestly, he was like your boyfriend instead of james.

you knew it was wrong, of course, but you couldn’t help it.

and he really did took care of you. he let you wear his shirt and sweatpants after you took a bath and cooked food for with you.

oh, how you wished he was your boyfriend. but that’s impossible, he’s just a temporary fix. he even said it himself, so you just have to come to him whenever you’re hurt because of your real boyfriend.

he drove you back to your apartment and after that, you thanked him.

“today was fun.” you stated when he rolled down his window of his car, smiling at him.

“i’m glad. you can call me when you feel like i’m your good time.”

you nodded, waving. “i will, see you.”

he smiled back, waving. you watched the car driving away as you sighed.

you walked to the door of the flat, and opened it. you went in and heard something unusual.

and it hit you.

your boyfriend james was fucking somebody.

we can roll in the darkness

let me touch you where your heart is

and if you're feeling the weakness

well i told you baby that you can call me

i’ll be your temporary fix

you can call me

you don’t know what to do. why were you feeling relief, when you should be crying at this point?

“oh james~” the girl moaned out, and you cringed.

you sat on the sofa, waiting for the two to get out of the bedroom. after some time, james and his slut went out and got startled by you.

“(y-y/n)! i d-didn’t hear you coming in-“

“save it, james. besides, i have someone else. i’m pretty sure you don’t feel the spark anymore in our relationship, right? because i don’t.” you laughed bitterly.

“oh really, when was the last time you felt the spark with him?” the slut chuckled. “you two have been dating for 11 months... while me and james have been fucking for 9 months.”

your jaw dropped. 9 months, he’s been cheating on you?

and there you felt your heart dropping as you felt tears fill up your eyes, but you refused to show it. “so, is that true, james?”

he nodded, and you slapped him hard. “i can’t fucking believe you. sure, me and ben fucked earlier, but you and that slut? for 9 months, and i didn’t know?”

he looked down. “i’m sorry (y/n)-“

“fuck off, dickwad. i’ll get my things tomorrow. go live with that slut.” you turned around, and got out of the flat.

this is so fucked up.

you grabbed your phone and called ben. he picked it up immediately. “love, what’s wrong-“

“j-james cheated on me. for 9 months and i didn’t know! please ben...” you sobbed. “i need you.”

“that dick.” he sighed. “i’ll pick you up at the cafe. for now, you can sleep at my place. stay there, and i’ll take care of you.“

you smiled. he’s the only one who can make you smile dearly. “thank you, ben.”

“anything, (y/n).”

after he ended the call, it came to your realization that...you were in love with him.

even if you just met a month ago, you felt so much love around him.

you were in love with benjamin jones.

you can call me

when you're lonely

when you can't sleep

i’ll be your temporary fix

you control me, even if it's just tonight

ben arrived at the cafe and spotted you, drinking coffee. he smiled at himself.

oh how he wanted you. how he wanted to kiss you.

how he wanted to be with you.

he walked up to you, and waved. “how are you feeling?”

“shit.” you responded, continuing to drink your coffee. he laughed and sat beside you.

“your things are still in that flat, right?” he asked and you nodded. “i could help you with your things tomorrow, but i don’t want to. you can just use my mom’s old clothes.”

you smiled. “thanks, but why does she have her clothes at your house? if you don’t mind me asking.”

“err..” he rubbed the back of his head. “her clothes there doesn’t fit her anymore, which i think fits you. she left it at my place because she said that if i have a girlfriend, my ‘girlfriend’ can use it.”

you blushed. “so... i’m your girlfriend?”

oh shit.

“i mEAN-“

“if you want to..” ben chuckled. “i want to be more than just a temporary fix for you. the first time i saw you at the restaurant, i couldn’t help but talk to you. how can someone cheat on you, hurt you?”

and he was in love with (y/n) (l/n).

you can call me

when you feel like

i’m your good time

i’ll be your temporary fix

you can own me, and we'll call this what you like

let me be your good night

you smiled. “i feel the same way, ben.”

his eyes lit up. “really?” and he kissed you. it was gentle, as if you were going to break.

after you pulled away, you looked at him and laughed. “also, why can’t you help me tomorrow?”

“i want to spend time with you, not to deal with that dick.”

the both of you intertwined fingers, and you spoke up.

“promise me you won’t hurt me?”

“i can’t promise you that.” he sighed. “i can’t promise you that i won’t hurt you. we may fight and i might hurt your feelings.” he faced you. “but i can promise to stay with you forever.”

you hugged him. years went by, yes, he sometimes hurt your feelings when the both of you fought, but he says sorry even if you were in the wrong. he doesn’t want to lose you.

but he never broke his promise: to stay with you forever.

[currentlyreadingmanga]

Toilet-bound Hanako-kun Chapter 13: The 4pm Bookstacks (Part 3)

Previously: we met the fifth mystery of the school, Tsuchigomori, and poor Yashiro and Kou had quite the embarrassing time sharing some of their secrets. We also learned about the possible threat of a traitor among the mysteries and about Hanako’s drastic plan that consists of destroying the yorishiros before any of them have the chance of go on a rampage like it happened with Yako. After some funny moments and some adorable bonding time with our main trio, Tsugochimori agreed to guide them to his yorishiro. Oh! And Tsuchigomori seems like a huge grumpy tease and I already kinda love him. So yeah......

Now onto the next chapter!

Ahhh it’s nice to be back. Not only I was too busy studying but I’m also dealing with a cold at the moment, so I’m really glad that I get to take this weekend off to rest. So what better way to do it than this? I’m so excited!

There’s a lot going on here. I’m not sure who the figure kneeling on the ground could be. (EDIT: Hello, this is future me after reading this chapter and also chapter 14, and: Would this be Tsuchigomori? since everything else here hints at the conversation he had with Hanako in the memory we saw. Also and I could be reaching with this the fact that he’s in this position, kneeling before Hanako who is holding the lunar rock and what I assume to be his own book seems significant. Because I often associate a kneeling position with two main emotions: devotion and defeat. And here I think it could be trying to convey the latter. Like, Tsuchigomori knew that Hanako was clearly going through a lot but didn’t do anything about it because his book said that he would turn up fine, that this child would have a secure and happy future despite it all. But then he died, way too soon, when he still was just a child. And now here he remains at the school, as the seventh mystery, Hanako-san. And idk despite this grumpy attitude Tsuchigomori tries to maintain, he seemed to be obviously distraught by what happened; like, it wouldn’t be weird to me if he felt some degree of guilt because he didn’t try to help more)

Besides that, there seem to be newspaper clippings? also bandages and possibly rubbing alcohol? also tweezers? Quite a few items that one can find in a first aid kit, if that’s the case. 

And then there’s the main focus of the image: Hanako holding a rock of some sort and,... his own book? maybe? that’s my best since it seems to be black. ...........wait, could we possibly find out more about him this chapter??? ohhhhhhh now I’m even more excited. But yeah, there’s also a rope (?) tied to his pinky finger. Could that be a reference to the red string of fate? That’s the only thing that comes to mind. God, I have so many questions and this is barely the first page, I need to move on or we’ll be here forever.

But yeah, we’re right where we left off last time and Tsuchigomori is leading them to his yorishiro.

Update: Still hot

Kou and Hanako are pumped to get this done but oh! it seems like Tsuchigomori is only gonna let Yashiro go with him since she’s the one that will destroy the yorishiro. Also, he calls her “kannagi girl” and: “a medium or shaman, usually female, who acts as a medium between humans and the spirits or gods, helping to communicate between the two and to calm any supernatural or spiritual upset”. That’s interesting. Is that just a general term that is used to refer to humans who have this ability? Yashiro has it because she’s Hanako’s assistant and because of the bond they share, right? Or would there be another reason for it? Like, could she have had this ability even if she didn’t have this connection with Hanako? Because she was still able to see him the first time she went to the bathroom...but I guess she still wasn’t able to touch him there, so maybe she wouldn’t have been able to touch a yorishiro either if they hadn’t been linked together.

Well, Hanako says it just means that she’s his assistant, so I guess we can leave it at that.

Kou is not happy at all with the idea of letting Yashiro go alone with Tsuchigomori (can’t say I really blame him, I mean, even if I don’t think he’s a bad guy, they just learned he’s a supernatural being just a few minutes (?) ago). The man in question just asks Hanako if he can’t trust him to not do anything to Yashiro and Hanako ends up agreeing to let her go but

That’s a warning if I’ve ever seen one. Like, “you better take good care of her or else”, you know? That’s the feeling it gives me.

But yeah, Yashiro ends up going alone with Tsuchigomori. Am I worried about her? I mean, yeah, a bit. Again, he doesn’t give me bad vibes and I don’t think he will try anything, but Yashiro tends to find herself in risky situations way too often so the possibility is always there.

The place looks like a cave of some sort and it seems to be filled with gemstones and ohhh now I understand their presence in that one colour page a couple of chapters ago.

Her sense of self-preservation really is almost non-existent, huh? Yashiro, sweetie, please be careful, please, I beg of y o  u

Oh! They keep walking and he asks her about how Hanako and her are getting along and

First: I love my babies so much, their friendship warms my heart. There’s no denying that Hanako is a little shit sometimes (a lot of the time) but he really has been mostly kind to Yashiro since they’ve met.

Second: not only this man is a big tease, but he’s also a softie on the inside, isn’t he? Like, I kinda got that feeling last chapter when he looked so shocked about Hanako’s expression and when he gave Yashiro and Kou head pats, and this just seems like more evidence. From the way he slowly asked the question and how he didn’t look at her while asking, to his surprise stare and his awkward head scratch when she answered, everything screams “I care about these children but I refuse to show it because I have an image to upkeep gdi”. Please tell me he’s gonna be the reluctant father figure, it would be amazing

It sure looks that way, Yashiro, and I’m so here for it.

She asks him if what’s written in the books can be changed because she doesn’t want to have her heart broken by some douche in the future awwww baby. But that’s a very good question, I hadn’t really thought about it. Tsuchigomori says it is “fundamentally impossible to alter the future”. Huh. Okay, that’s interesting. So, even if you were to read your own book, you still wouldn’t be able to change what’s written there? Like, even if you tried to change things, the outcome would still be the same no matter what? 

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh that’s a cool mechanic. By raising the stakes so high, it gives us a better understanding of how some of the rules of this world work. But it also brings up more questions: like, how does he know that he will be erased if he changes the future? is there a higher entity that oversees these kinds of matters? Hanako had mentioned that he had made a deal with “God” so that his sins would be forgiven, after all.

.................you can’t say that and don’t tell us how this person changed their future! Especially when you’ve emphasized how rare it is! C’mon, now I wanna now!! also what he said to Yashiro is really sweet awww i can see behind your grumpy facade, you can’t fool me

Anyway, they’ve arrived at their destination and wow there are so many big gemstones on top of books! Now I really want to see this room animated. It looks really pretty~ 

Like Yashiro, I thought that one of those was his yorishiro but nope, we were wrong and thinking about it I guess it makes sense since it would be kinda weird to have it so obviously displayed; like, this room is hidden already but it’s understandable that he would hide it even within the room itself.

omfg Yashiro please that’s rude! 

But also! “are ones with the strongest feelings connected to them” + that soft look and that slight smile!! There’s obviously a very important story behind it (again, like we saw with Yako and her scissors) and we’ll learn about it, right? We saw Yako’s memories of Misaki when Yashiro destroyed the yorishiro, so something similar should happen when she destroys this rock-.....wait.......

Okay so I went back to look at the first page of this chapter and

Is that the same rock?? What does that mean?? Is it just for artistic reasons or is it connected? Did Hanako give Tsuchigomori that rock? Is that why he was acting worried about our little ghost boy before? But if that’s the case, when would have this happen? And why would he have such strong feelings connected to it? Are we gonna find out? omg adjshfda

Ohhhhhhhh he says that the one who gifted him that rock was the guy that changed his future! And he mentions that he still doesn’t know why the future changed. And that’s very curious, like, if it is as hard as he mentioned, then it would be nearly impossible, right? But also if that rock is related to Hanako does that mean that he’s the one that changed his future?? how??? please?? I need answ e r  s

...................excuse me, what??? um, I have questions, the main one being: how?? 

He says that he got the rock the day after the moon landing and honestly? the timing of that is impressive, considering he says that this guy wasn’t an astronaut 

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Is that my ghost child I see??? Oh my god did they meet when Hanako was still alive???? Are we getting his back story so soon??? Okay, I need to. calm tf down and keep reading so I’ll find out ahhhh

Don’t you dare keep me in the dark after dropping a bomb like that, Tsuchigomori! You may be hot and charming but I’ll hunt you down for the answers I need, mister

Ahhhhhhhhhh okay, so she took the seal off, so that should destroy the yorishiro and the boundary, right?

!!!!!!!!!

So we are getting to see the memories connected to the object like with Yako! And there it says the date: 1969-7-22

Oh boy, oh man, here we go

There’s the school!

!!!!!!!!!

∑(;°Д°) !!!!!!!!!! THERE HE IS!!! WHY IS HE SO HURT OH MY GOD WHAT

jfc he’s covered with bruises and cuts. Who would do something like this??? God, that’s horrible and Tsuchigomori says it’s a daily thing? Is it a bad case of bullying? Where are his parents? Because those are not injures he would be able to hide, there are too many and in very obvious places. Hell, all the possibilities running through my head just get worse and worse. Like, it could be that his parents are dead, or that his parents know and don’t care, or even that his parents are the ones behind it and just. god, that would honestly be heartbreaking

He looks so sad and small here. Just an innocent child ffs who would do this to him??

This has been going on for more than a year???? Does no one care about the state this child is in except for Tsuchigomori??? I- okay, deep breaths, I need to calm down and keep reading

(So. Amane Yugi. So we’ve finally got his real name, huh? Is the translation here last name+first name or did the change the order to first name+last name?)

Sorry, it’s just that. I’m so used to seeing Hanako being goofy and silly that seeing him look so defeated and broken here just makes my heart hurt.

Tsuchigomori says that he wants Hanako, or, well, Amane, to talk to him about who is doing this to him because he’s worried who wouldn’t be and Amane says that it isn’t a problem but no, no, baby, it is, no one should even think about hurting you in such a way! And Tsuchigomori says just that: “just what kind of reason could justify hurting someone this bad?” 

........................... I honestly feel like crying right now. It really is looking like someone close to him is the one behind this and it’s just fucking horrible someone please stop this train of feels I want to get out (ಥ﹏ಥ)

You know, I have heard that this series gets angstier as the chapters go on but I really. really didn’t expect to get this emotional oh boy

(EDIT: I’ve already read and taken notes for chapter 14 but I’m really tired, so I’ll edit it and upload it tomorrow since I also have to crop the images)

[onisiondrama]

Killstream w/ Onision 3/30/2020 - Summary Part 4

Re-Upload

(Unless specifically stated, everything written is from Greg / James’ words. Parenthesis are my notes/thoughts.):

Host is reading questions from fans who paid. Someone asked if Greg really went to SERE school and if he passed. Greg says he flunked out because he couldn't kill a rabbit.

Someone asked why he isn’t friends with Cyr, says they heard it was because they heard Cyr didn’t vote for Hillary in 2016. Greg says this is why he likes NDA’s, this could have been handled privately and they would still be friends. Says Cyr voted independent and that’s retarded. It escalated after Cyr’s girlfriend Dasha got involved. He says Dasha is the girl Cyr hit. Dasha was anti-o and Cyr became one. (It did not escalate because of Dasha. Greg publicly terminated the friendship way before she got involved. This was in November 2016. Cyr and Greg had a few jabs at each other after. In December, Cyr made a diss track about how Greg profits off of drama and makes fake drama. Greg made a diss track in response about Cyr and in it he called Dahsa a “Russian prostitute”. That’s when she started started tweeting against Greg. Their friendship was already dead at that point.)

Greg says Hansen says the window thing was all Greg’s fault. (Did he? I don’t recall that. EDIT: No he didn’t. They just talked about how they thought it was strange he filmed his child after.)

Greg says Sarah was the worst out of all (the exes I guess?) because she went after Kai, who did nothing wrong. Sarah wanted vengeance because Greg hurt her feelings. He says Billie admitted she’s a vengeful person and Shiloh is bat shit crazy, as Edwin found out. He says the crazy can’t hide in some people and it comes out quick. He says when she said she was going to kill herself and make it look like he did it, his mom and aunt laughed sadistically over the phone when they heard it. He says he was weirded out but now he kind of gets it because the situation was so ridiculous.

Keem asks if Greg was molested by his dad. Greg says no, but his dad is an accused child molester and he doesn’t remember most of his childhood. He says according to people, his dad and other family members were molested and maybe that’s why he (his father) is an alleged molester.

Greg says he was never touched by an adult, but when he was 11 he finger banged a girl that was 4 years older than him because she went to his bed. Everyone reacts really shocked and sympathetic. “Oh man.” “Oh bro.” He says it was his first kiss too. Host asks if he understands he was molested and they’re all concerned. Greg asks how he suffered. Host says it sounds like he was molested in his voice. Keem says something about people who were molested when they were young have a nasally voice. Host says a lot of people are emotionally stunted from being molested. Greg says he really doesn’t think he was molested and his dad wasn’t into penis.

They talk about Greg’s livestream with Newsweek guy. Keems says Greg steamrolled him. Keem talks about a bad experience he had with the same reporter.

They read an anonymous submission to a blog where anon accuses of Greg of influencing their friend to commit suicide because of his Speaks videos. (From back when they were opinion / advise videos.) Greg in response reads tweets from fans saying he saved their life. He says you can’t pick and chose who you believe.

They play the clip of Holly on Hansen’s stream accusing Greg of influencing a fan to starve them self to death because of his videos. Everyone (but Greg) says they don’t believe it and laugh. Greg says she’s lying because she’s looking up to the right.

Greg says Repzion gave up on being a Youtuber and went to welding school, but started up again when he made a video about the Wetlands. Says Repzion thanked Greg for rebooting his career. (I’m pretty sure Repzion thanked him for paying off his schooling, but idk. I don’t feel like looking that one up, but I thought Repzion said he’s not a Youtuber anymore, just does it on the side.)

Keem says the anti-o movement imploded because Greg wasn’t arrested and there’s nothing to talk about anymore so they make up lies. Greg says he was mean to a lot of people so they wanted to hurt him and their shining knight (Hansen) flopped on his face. Host agrees.

Host goes back to reading questions. Someone asked if Greg is gay because he’s with Kai. Greg says he’s “2020 gay, not 2019 gay.” (I think this was a joke? I’m really not sure. It was a flat delivery for him, not a typical joking style for him.)

Greg decides to defend himself for taking a photo of his kid after she fell out of a window even though no one brought it up. He says you know when someone takes a picture of a body before they move it? That’s what he did. He says he took a video from the window down to show where the impact happened. He says it would be for the doctor or detective if they needed it. He says it’s important to know how the child fell. Host asks what he would say to someone who never heard of anyone doing that before. He says he had time to think about it and the other parent was bending down,  blocking part of the child. He says he told the detective he learned to do that from Shiloh because he filmed himself so they would know what he was doing when he waited for the police to show up and to show she wasn’t murdered by him. He says he also gave the ring video. Host asks if “other parent” was the mother. Greg says it’s complicated with the transgender thing, but yes technically mother.

Keem asks if Greg felt responsible or guilty. Greg says it could have been avoided if he was smarter. He says it wouldn’t have happened to other parents that were more paranoid about windows. He thought he positioned the bed in a way she couldn’t climb onto it. Only the corner of the bed was by the window. He says if she grows up to blame him, technically he is to blame. Throughout him saying this, they keep asking but did you feel guilty? He finally answers yes and laughs. Keem says it’s normal for a parent to feel guilty. Greg says it’s on whoever was watching the kid at the time (I guess that would have been Kai?), but then he says you could spend all day trying to figure out why it’s not your fault.

Greg says when he was at VidCon someone yelled “SHANE DAWSON” at him. He turned around and they were like, “oh.” He says he hates that.

Keem asked if he wore a bulletproof to VidCon. Greg says he got death threats and didn’t care if he looked stupid. He says everyone thought it was stupid until the Christina Grimme thing happened, but she got shot in the face so that wouldn’t help. Keem asks if wore it to court. Greg says yes. Says people said he wore it backwards but he doesn’t know what the fuck they’re talking about. He says he didn’t want to get stabbed. Says it’s stab proof and 9mm proof.

Someone asks how young to too young. Greg says no if you’re under 25, you’re too young for him.

Someone asks what he plans to do when this is over. Greg says CGI porn, it’s pretty fun.

Someone asks why he didn’t do anything after his moderators told him there were undesirables on his forums. Greg says it was their job to ban them. He says his Discord moderators mostly ban people, he rarely bans anyone. Moderators are there to do their fucking job, not ask questions.

Someone asked why he continued to make videos about Eugenia Cooney after she asked him to stop. He says he kept making videos about her because they were positive, but the anti-o retards don’t hear him. He says if he asks Repzion to stop making videos about him and Rep started making videos about how much he loves Onision, he wouldn’t tell him to stop again. He says Eugenia said to stop making negative videos and never complained after that. (That is not true. She sent the email asking him to stop in Feb 2017. After, he went on to make 55 more videos about her including many “negative” videos such as a video where he starved her to death in The Sims and a video of him laughing at her being beat up in a WWE game. Here is a timeline.)

[atinyidea]

[ 1 ] UNDER THE RAIN | THREE | O. Sehun

chapter summary — The aftermath of a fight can be messy and painful, but the people around you can change that to make this less messy and less painful. That is until the real ‘threat’ is remembered.

word count — 2.7k

tag list — @avmfreak96 and the tags from the first edition, please let me know if you would like me to untag you! @asslikegilinsky, @acevampyre, @high-on-food, @chanyeolol, and @marshmallow-phd! also, let me know if you would like to be added to the tag list!

main masterlist — the lunar myths masterlist

THREE — Resolutions And Repercussion

SEHUN

In the one month, one week and three days since he had met his you, his lovely mate, there had only been two times he had nearly lost his shit and either shifted in front of you or pulled you into his arms. Both of those time wouldn’t have been very good for either of you, and thankfully he had always been able to control himself and his wolf.

Now is the only time he had the urge to do both. His wolf shifted first.

Inside the bar, when the trio of rogues had entered, he was able to control the urge to pick you up and take you far away, but he had to get you out. For his sanity. When you went over to defend your friend, he felt the conflicting emotions of pride for his mate and the anger towards the rogues. But, when one of them grabbed you by the neck, his vision turned red.

He felt Danbi’s hands curl around his waist. It was a subtle technique the pack had come up with to help weres from shifting. Danbi was human, Junmyeon’s mate, and a wolf would never be able to hurt a pack member’s mate on purpose. It helped focus a were’s mind and clear the vision. It worked nine times out of ten, and it was working now plus, Junmyeon would actually kill him if anything happened to Danbi. He didn’t even remember what he said before his vision had cleared, but his mouth was open, and his fists were clenched.

And then you head-butted the fucker.

And Sehun was once again, filled with a sense of pride. His mate could take care of herself. Then he remembered that she was a human and she was going up against a rogue werewolf. You vaulted yourself over the bar counter, and a second later the rogue was over your shoulder and on the ground.

Sehun felt Danbi’s arms retreat from his waist. Maybe she was getting ready to vacate the bar and find Junmyeon, Sehun didn’t particularly care. He cared about the fact that he could now smell blood. When he looked up, he saw the split of your lip and the way blood dropped from it. Maybe Danbi saw it happen.

Before he knew it, he had charged at the trio, he yanked the guy who slapped you and sent several punches of rage at his face. The doorman, who Sehun heard was called Damon, had managed to push the fight outside, on a back street. Sehun got tackled by a different rogue. Punches and kicks were thrown left and right for however long. It was practically three against eight (nine if Damon was included, but he wasn’t really fighting) and before too much time had passed, two of the three had been detained.

And then you kicked the fucker. And the little shit shifted. And then Sehun shifted.

                                                           ••:۞:••

Kim Danbi had known about the existence of were’s practically her whole life. Her mother’s sister, Lim Soojin, was a mate and when her mother officially became a doctor Soojin’s mate had become really sick. Her mother became an informed healer, keeping her job at the hospital and learning how to help heal a were. It worked out well, the weres had a safe place where they could heal adequately without being questioned, and in exchange, Soojin didn’t have to keep such a huge secret from her family. When Danbi was little, she went to the hospital with her mother (because she was four and she had to) and wandered into a patient’s room in search for her mother. It was one of the super-closed-off places, and she had watched her mother go in there earlier and just followed her when she had finished her picture. There was a shifted wolf in the room, and so she learned the secret when she was very young. She grew up learning what her mother knew, and when she met Junmyeon, at the age of seventeen, she wanted to learn even more.

It was safe to say, as she worked on her doctorate, she knew how to tend to a head wound. When Sehun shifted, he pounced on the rogue the two of them tumbled down the street and off of you. Danbi made her way too you immediately after, watching Junmyeon shift and go after them from the corner of her eye.

When you went down, your head hit the edge of the sidewalk. When Danbi lifted your head slightly, she could see a small smudge of blood. She may need stitches. Without looking up, Danbi motioned for one of the boys to help her pick you up. Without any protest, both Luhan and Baekhyun had come over and picked you up.

“Be careful of her head.”

“Take her inside, the bar should be empty now.” The doorman spoke up. Honestly, Danbi forgot he was even there. Baekhyun and Luhan nodded in unison, moving back into the bar. Danbi had no idea where Tao and Eunjin had got to, but she was grateful they weren’t there for that mess of a fight. While Tao was an excellent fighter, whenever Eunjin was in proximity to the potential danger, he lost his focus very quickly, things may have gotten even messier.

Back inside the bar, the boys had placed you down on a set of cushioned seats and had pushed the table away. The other girl from the bar had switched the big lights on and laid a first aid box next to you before moving back into Damon’s side. Danbi thanked her with a small smile – Jinyoung, her name tag said – and knelt down on the floor.

She got to work cleaning the back of your head, you would definitely need a shower to get all the blood out, but once the wound was clean, she could tell you wouldn’t need stitches.

“She doesn’t need stitches, thank The Lunar, make sure Sehunnie knows as soon as possible, it’ll calm him down a little,” Danbi commented towards Baekhyun who was headed for the door. He nodded before leaving.

“Is she okay? What happened? Where are those men?” Jinyoung asked in a quiet voice like she was scared to even mutter the words. Danbi was about to answer when Luhan beat her to it.

“She’ll be okay, it’s not a big head wound. Those men won’t be bothering you again for a long time.”

“Where are they?” Damon asked, his deep voice bringing a sense of warmth to the empty bar.

“Two of them ran off when we got distracted. I suspect the third will follow shortly.” Luhan answered, locking eyes with the doorman. They knew he knew about weres, they just didn’t know if Jinyoung had any knowledge. They didn’t want to scare the poor girl more. As if he sensed this, Damon suggested the idea of home to the young girl and even offered to walk her to her apartment himself. Jinyoung nodded, a little hesitant as it was her job to lock up.

“We can take care of it. We’ll just slip the keys back under the door.” Luhan assured, and then the two of them left.  They would have to ask about his knowledge at a later date.

A few minutes passed before three men walked through the door. Junmyeon came through first, making his way over to Danbi immediately. Baekhyun and Sehun stumbled in together, Sehun was limping. While he was shirtless, he wasn’t completely naked, donning the pants Baekhyun was wearing earlier while Baekhyun resided in just his boxer shorts. At least they weren’t wholly indecent. Baekhyun set Sehun on the floor close to you and Danbi before running back out the doors – most likely to find and retrieve the torn cloth that was Sehun’s clothes.

He’d have to get a new leather jacket.

“Is she okay?” Was Sehun’s first question.

“She’s fine. Just hit her head a little hard. She didn’t pass out from the injury.” Was Danbi’s reply. She finished wrapping up the wound, setting your head down on the knit cardigan she had taken off earlier, and moved to attend to Sehun. “What happened?”

“The fucker has sharp teeth.” Danbi shot him a look, she was never one for curse words but refrained from saying anything, he didn’t deserve a lecture at this moment in time. As she pulled up the leg of Baekhyun’s sweatpants, Sehun was thankful he decided to be a little lazy in his attire that night. The bite wasn’t the deepest he had ever had, but it did hurt. The rogue had clipped his ankle.

“Nothing’s broken, but there is some swelling. You should be back to usual in a matter of hours. Try to refrain from running anywhere for at least three, please.” Danbi concluded with kind eyes. Sehun nodded and scooted closer to his unconscious mate. Just being in your presence, both calmed his wolf and made him twitchy.

A few minutes of silence passed before Baekhyun was back. “I think I found everything, I ran the block twice just in case.” He stated, walking towards their little group, concern lining his eyes. It was funny just how much the pack seemed to care for you, someone they hadn’t actually met before. Danbi assumed it was because you were their youngest’s mate. While all mates were sacred, the entire pack held a particular concern for their youngest. Danbi didn’t particularly understand the feeling, maybe it was motherly – the thought was always strange to her, considering how much older Sehun actually was than her. But Danbi just assumed it had something to do with their early days as a new pack.

After about ten minutes had passed, a small groan left your lips. Danbi could feel the small smile form on her own lips, her personal concern for you lifting. She really is one tough cookie, she thought, watching as you sat up slowly.

                                                          ••:۞:••

If you were honest with yourself, you fainted quite quickly. However, to be true to yourself, you only fainted after trying to punch the biggest wolf you’ve ever seen in the face. Then he jumped on top of you, and when you fell, hitting your head on the concrete pavement, you swore the wolf multiplied.

If you were honest, you might have dreamed the whole thing up because when you woke up, you were still inside the bar. You couldn’t have known where you would’ve woken up, but you had assumed it would be on the street floor out in the back. Opening your eyes was easy, adjusting to the lights was a little bit harder as you squinted a little to lessen the glare. Your head hurt like hell, and your hips definitely felt bruised already. Braving the pain, you made yourself sit up slowly. You were on one of the long, cushioned chairs that lined the bar.

When you lifted a hand to touch the back of your head, you felt the texture of a bandage. You definitely didn’t do that. When you hissed when you pressed too much pressure (accidentally, you weren’t really paying attention) you heard a low growl fill your ears. Slowly you turned to your side, finally noticing the group of people you were with, and moved so that you were sitting, facing them with your feet touching the floor.

You felt your eyebrows rise in surprise. The first person you saw and recalled was the girl who came with Sehun – Danbi. She was sat on the floor in the lap of a man, looking at you with a small smile, with an opened first aid kit next to her feet. She must have bandaged my head. You didn’t know if you smiled back at her, but you made a mental note to thank her. Then next person you recognised was right next to you – and shirtless.

Sehun was the closest to you and seemed to glare at your hand as you slowly brought it down from the back of your head. Why is he shirtless? You opened your mouth to ask a question, your nose scrunching up at the slight pain the action caused both your lip and your head.

“What… happened?” You managed to get out, looking down at the bandage that covered Sehun’s ankle. “Are you okay?” His eyes met yours, and you could see the hint of surprise in the dark brown irises. Bit by bit, memory what actually went down came back to you. “Was that actually a big ass wolf?”

You hadn’t expected it, but Sehun actually snorted. And then another dude snorted too. Your attention moved over to him, standing against a table with no pants on. Well.

“I’m sorry, is something funny?” You asked, eyebrows furrowing in confusion.

“Don’t laugh at the poor girl, Sehun, just tell her, we don’t know who the rogues were, but we know that at least one of them caught her scent.” The man Danbi was sitting on spoke up, and their small laughing fit stopped.

“Rogue? Scent? What are you talking about.” You didn’t shout, maybe because you were already piecing it together.

After a second of silence, Sehun turned his body to you, eyes connecting with your own. Again, you saw the green flash in them for a second before it disappeared. “The wolf… was the guy you were fighting.” He spoke clearly. You felt a hand on your knee, but you dismissed it – maybe you wanted to be comforted a little, but you’d never admit it out loud. “He is a werewolf. Like me, and Junmyeon-hyung, Luhan-hyung and Baekhyun-hyung.”

“Werewolves? Like the myths?” You asked slowly.

He nodded. You nodded back.

When you were little, your grandfather used to tell you the myths of The Lunar and their creations of children. The myths of the werefolk were always your favourite myth (Euina’s were the myths of the merfolk), and you had always believed in them a little bit but, the actual proof of it was given, and you had to take a few seconds to adjust.

“Okay.” You murmured, finally.

“Okay?”

“That was easier than expected.”

“Wow, even Eunjin took more convincing.”

You just shrugged. “You said something about a rogue? And my scent? What does that mean?”

It was as if you flipped a switched in them, especially Sehun. His smile slipped from his lips, and his grip tightened slightly on your knee.

“It means you’re not safe back at your apartment,” Danbi said softly, standing to walk over and take a seat next to you. “We don’t know who they were, we’ve never encountered them before. Sehun was just telling us that the guy threatened us with your scent before running away. Do you have anywhere else you could sta-“

“With us. She can stay with us.” Sehun cut her off.

You didn’t really care about where you stayed, you were a little more concerned with the fact that a drunken idiot-werewolf-dick-of-a-dude was now on a quest for your head or something. You didn’t know why he was so pressed, was it because you were close to beating his ass? Did he feel threatened by a girl? All these thoughts ran through your head, you didn’t comprehend the conversation happening around you.

A sudden flash of realisation flooded through you, your eyes widened as you gasped. “Did you say my apartment wasn’t safe?” You asked, receiving several nods. “Euina, my little sister, she’s still there! They won’t go tonight, will they? What if they do and they take her or hurt her or something?” You exclaimed, feeling guilty for only thinking of her now.

“She’ll be fin-“ Sehun started, but you cut him off.

“Fine? No. I’ll go get her, we can stay in a hotel or someth-“

“No, you’re staying with us.”

“I am not leaving her in an unsafe place.”

“Then we can send someone to go get he-“

“You think she’ll go with a stranger willingly? I’m going to get my sist-“

“Not alone you’re not, we’re getting you out of here right now.”

“We can go when I have my sister.” You said slowly, almost glaring at him. The room was silent for a second before he nodded, albeit reluctantly, but he still nodded. The two of you stood.

“We’ll meet you at the house. And don’t shift with that ankle.” Danbi bid you goodbye and the two of you left for your apartment, to get to your sister – and hopefully, before some rogue dickhead did.

Did you like that one? Give me your thoughts on what you think’ll happen next!

[saiharas-world-blog]

Okay, so I have to post something.

Uh, uhm.

OKAY

DRV3 BOYS WITH A S/O THAT ASKS TO TIE RIBBONS ONTO THEIR HAIR

(By Mod Kiibo!)

Gonta Gokuhara

- "hey gonta can i put these on you?"

- this is sweet boy

- so when you walk up to him with alot of tiny ribbons

- and ask if you can place them on his hair

- he'd instantly go with it

- "gonta don't understand why s/o wants to put ribbons in gonta's hair"

- "its okay you dont need to"

- you guys just enjoy some silence for a while, you're probably humming too

- "gonta feels like a christmas tree"

- uh

- okay he didn't have to put it that way

- but by the time you're done he's super happy

- they look so cute! Gonta likes it!

- 50% because you took the liberty to make the ribbons look like butterflies but okay

- oH HE'LL ASK TO DO THE SAME

- YOU CAN'T STOP HIM

- overall happy Gonta though💕💕

- by the end of the day your hair could practically be a mess like his

- plus some (fav. color) ribbons strung onto your hair

- alsO SINCE HE'S PRETTY BIG YOU CAN IMAGINE HOW HE TUGS AT YOUR HAIR

- he's pretty gentle, im not gonna lie

- but there are just those times

- you may or may not have yelled at him

- yeah maybe next time you should teach him how to do it properly

K1-B0

- "wait what"

- he doesn't understand, he'll be reluctant

- "come on, it'll be fun!"

- "but aren't ribbons for girls??"

- he'll probably google boys with ribbons on their hair while you're talking

- soon enough he agrees

- okay so once you start caressing his hair you're just like

- what kind of f_cking conditioner do you use?

- like, holy hell his hair feels like the things you'd see on a L'Oréal commercial.

- he's confused with your reactions because

- what are you talking about?? its just his hair??

- when he tells you it's synthetic you're like OH

- you keep quiet after that, just enjoying the way his hair feels so ugjkhwNKfhlKlwhIHoGj

- he doesn't ask to put ribbons on your hair when you're done, since he's calculated a 78.6% chance of failure

- he actually loves the way it looks though, little electric blue ribbon delicately strung onto his hair.

- oh, then you show him a surprise

- basically you turn off the lights and the ribbons glow

- "OH WOW S/O WHERE DID YOU GET THESE"

- "whY? ARE YOU GOING TO BUY SOME??"

Kaito Momota

- okay you wanna know what you did?

- yeah?

- okay, so you didn't tell him that you were going to put ribbons in his hair

- instead, you went something along the lines of;

- "hey kaito can i put stars in your hair?"

- he's hesitant because where the hell are you going to get stars to put in his hair

- also because it probably isn't masculine

- but i mean

- they're stARS HOW COULD HE NOT--

- so he says yes

- okay his hair is weird and you'd probably have a hard time working with this

- but the end result is worth it

- you practically made his hair a canvas and your ribbons the paint

- you stuck to your word though

- in his hair, laid a freaking galaxy

- kaito's hair color was perfect

- purple, yellow, and white glittery ribbons adorned the man

- and they were shaped into stars

- you have no idea how much this boy's love for you has grown

- "hey maybe i can add some to your goatee too"

- that was a joke

- obviously

- but when he went "Go ahead!"

- you just hAD TO

- so now he's walking around with stars on his hair and one glittery purple star on his goatee

Kokichi Ouma

- let me show you something

- its just ouma with ribbons

- i edited that, i know

- he looks like a girl but don't mind that

- ngl, you probably did this while he was asleep

- so he'd wake up in the morning like he usually does

- then he looks into the mirror and--

- "WOAH I LOOK LIKE A GIRL"

- immediately runs to you

- you'd be making coffee or something

- then you'd look at him and burst out laughing

- "y'know, that look suits you"

- "S/O THIS ISN'T FUNNY"

- pouty boy

- "as the ultimate supreme leader i demand you rid of these immediately!!"

- nah, man

- he tried removing the ribbons

- he failed miserably

- you may or may not have made a bet that he can't survive 24 hours normally with those on

- you may or may not have said you wouldn't remove it if you won

- he may or may not have said he'll style your hair and you'll have to go with it for 24 hours if he won

- at the end of the day he just walks into your room

- with that huge smirk on his face

- and oh sh_t he won the bet

- you just slowly remove the ribbons as it dawns upon you that your supreme overlord boyfriend is going to mess up your hair

- haha good luck

Korekiyo Shinguji

- why bother put ribbons in his hair

- if you can make his hair into a ribbon

- initially, you were just running your fingers through his hair

- the thought of how his hairstyle is so feminine sparked into a conversation

- eventually leading you to suggest styling his hair

- "no"

- "but--"

- "no"

- don't worry though

- he'll reluctantly agree

- that is after you promise not to cut or color his hair

- he tells you stories while you do your thing

- you know tsuyu asui from bnha?

- imagine kork with that hairstyle

- +lucky clover shaped ribbons

- "you're a walking good luck charm now!"

- "no wonder you're here with me"

- SMOOTH 100

- he styles your hair to (somehow) match his

- he doesn't know how to do the clover ribbon thing

- so he just turns them into extensions of sorts

- you and kork should do this more often!

Rantaro Amami

- "okay"

- avocado boi is just so chill and open

- like you don't even have to ask

- slight hassle because his hair is short

- you ended up adding clips too

- so he basically has this one medium sized ribbon on the right side of his head

- and a sh_ton baby ribbons just scattered everywhere

- you just start joking around

- "oh no! Ribbons seem to have invaded your scalp!"

- he goes with it

- "oh no! Am i going to die??"

- "if you can get to the cure, then you won't have to suffer anymore"

- "and the cure is?"

- "hidden after hours of cuddles"

- im sure you can tell where this is going

- so you guys cuddle

- you remove the ribbons from his hair

- and the day goes on like usual

- then tomorrow comes

- and avocado boi sees you with a bunch of ribbons in your hair

- its too early for this

- before he can even speak you look at him and exclaim

- "RANTARO THE RIBBONS HAVE INFECTED ME--"

- "the wHAT??"

- a few minutes later and you're just laughing

- "okay so maybe i wasn't infected. do you like my new hairstyle?"

- "sure, it suits you"

- avocado boi is amused

- yay to s/o!

Ryoma Hoshi

- i

- i just

- im not sure how this'll work

- his hair is super short???

- that doesn't stop you from trying though!

- he goes with it

- he plans on covering them with his hat anyway if ever you insist he keeps them on

- you did a thing

- where uh

- you weaved the ribbons and stuck them to a bunch of clips

- those in which you placed onto his hair

- like amami, ryoma has this "surperior ribbon" on one side of his head

- when you're finished he probably looks like a 2 year old kid with an extra (personality wise) woman for a mom

- ngl he doesn't like how it looks

- of course he won't tell you that

- he won't try to decorate your hair, mostly because he can't reach but--

- he'll ask nicely if he can remove the ribbons

- as nicely as he can at least--

- its a whole different story when you compliment him though

- "maybe i'll keep them on a little longer"

- nice work s/o!

Shuichi Saihara

- "o-oh?"

- he'll give you a minute to wait before he says yes

- atua knows why he took a minute but alright

- in your mind its just;

- "i'm going to make sweetchi look sweeter after this"

- you decided to get some goth ribbons beforehand!

- like those little clips with those tiny glittery skulls

- okay maybe you went with pastel goth

- moving on,

- his hair is so smooth

- it feels like he uses Patene or Treseme even!

- "even hairstylists are impressed"

- "what"

- "nothing, i just thought of mimicking a shampoo commercial"

- you had some fun combing his hair

- so much fun that he had to remind you that you were supposed to put ribbons

- oops, haha

- you start squealing halfway through

- "are you okay?"

- "yes im just imagining how cute you'd look after this"

- cuE INTENSE BLUSHING

- you were practically going to die once you finished

- one look at him and you knew

- Mission: Success

- and he just has this rosy blush and the way his eyelashes flutter--

- rip in peace s/o

- (rest in peace in peace???)

- he decorates your hair as a thanks

- he did amAZINGLY

- oh yeah he also used the pastel goth ribbons

- so now you two match!

- happy sweetchi and happy s/o!

Side note: I'd love to see sprite edits/fanart of these!

-Mod Kiibo

[saleintothe90s]

381. It Came From the Daily Show: one episode from June 1999, and one from July, 1999

(April and May, 1999)

I fell behind on this series because Daily Show (especially back then) only worked for about 2 weeks out of every month during the Summer. There was slim pickings. Also, I have to get this out of the way so we can discuss the episode of Daily Show where Jon makes fun of Garth Brooks for being Chris Gaines!! 

June 24, 1999

Intro - “I’ma’ gonna totally sign your yearbook!” “ I can’t believe we’re going to college in the fall! BFF!” 

Headlines - Spike-O Killer - Son of Sam is upset about the movie about him, Summer of Sam, “demands more Summer, less Sam.” Son of Sam says the film is “hurtful to society”, and the audience dies laughing. He’s also mad that he’s being played by “the fat guy from The Practice”.

Headlines - “Deep Ship” - Bob Ballard has found two of the oldest shipwrecks off the coast of Israel. Obligatory Gilligan’s Island three hour tour reference.  We also learn about Polyphemus?! Don’t worry, Jon didn’t know about him either. 

Correspondent Bit - “Another World”. Stephen Colbert discusses the NBC soap opera Another World being canceled. Jon would never leave Lilah in an elevator shaft while in labor during the big ball! Does he ever wonder about his bastard elevator baby?! Does Stephen Colbert look french? Daddy?!  I love it when they did stupid bits like this back then, I’m also just a sucker for when they changed the lights in the studio.

(There’s also a hilarious bit from the summer of 2001 where Steve Carell cries over Luke and Laura from General Hospital finally divorcing.)

Special Report - Terror in the Toy Chest. I love it when Jon talks about mundane things such as toys. In this case, its a Tarzan doll that makes a masturbatory gesture, a prudish woman is filing a obscenity complaint against Toys R Us selling an Austin Powers doll that says “do I make you horny, baby?”, and pool dive sticks have been impaling children in the butt. I remember the pool dive sticks being recalled! 

Cherilyn Paulsen of Silver Spring, Md., wishes she had taken the dive stick away from her daughter. In August 1997, Paulsen’s daughter was jumping and playing in an inflatable pool in the family’s backyard, celebrating her 6th birthday.

“The next thing I heard was my daughter’s blood-curdling scream,” Paulsen remembered.

The girl had been impaled on a dive stick brought to the party by a friend. Paulsen’s daughter was flown to an area children’s hospital, where she underwent two hours of surgery.

“It tears through children’s bodies,” Paulsen said of the toy. “It looks harmless, but people need to realize how much harm they can do.” 1

Take a listen to the hotline the company has set up: 

See also: 

Other News: Purple Reign - Phil Jackson is named coach to the Lakers. 

This Just In:  Commie Dearest - Khrushchev’s son passes the U.S. Citizenship test. We’re all fish theologists? 

Public Excess - Karaoke King - I’ve probably mentioned this before, but Public Excess was one of my favorite bits back in the day. Rich Brown would introduce the craziest and the dumbest clips from the dying format of public access TV. I know some people who review old Daily Shows don’t like the segment, but we didn’t have YouTube back then! This was it for us if we wanted stupid people!  In this edition, a guy in a crappy suit sings a song about a teenager in love and says the song is all about him, Lorenzo dances around in a gold jacket with some fancy effects, and a muppet looking guy who is proud to be a federal worker? Omg, this guy crank calls and asks how he keeps his head so shiny! 

July 22, 1999

If memory serves me correct, Daily Show always goes on a big break in July, so these pickings were real slim. also, the Vance DeGeneres Tales of Survival field piece is missing a part off of the Comedy Central Website. I’m 90% sure I don’t have this episode on vhs either. I did, however find the commercial breaks from this episode.

Headlines: MissPentagon - Congress blasts Pentagon for misuse of military funds--including a Comanche helicopter that is so loaded down with weaponry, the pilot has to weigh under 110 pounds. In 2004, the program was finally canceled.

Headlines: Lemmingway - George Hemingway turns 100. There was a look-a-like contest and a key lime pie eating contest in Key West. Gross.

Correspondent Piece - A Tale of Survival: S.J. Sharkie - Okay, so the doofus who cut these episodes of TDS up forgot to include the first part of Vance DeGeneres’ bit about S.J. Sharkie, the San Jose Sharks hockey mascot being stuck in the rafters of the stadium during a bit where he was supposed to be descended upon the ice. Staff lowered him down another rope and he was able to reel back up to safety. 

Other News: The Patch is Prologue - Women might finally get birth control patches -- “putting an end to all loud speaker condom price check jokes”. 

I just remembered that annoying Ortho-Evra commercial from 2003 where the lady keeps flashing us her underwear. 

This Just in: Friends in Greed - “NBC pays five million dollars an episode for Friends. Cast of Suddenly Susan to receive new fanny packs.” 

Al Up in That: Milk - 91 year old Daily Show consumer advocate, Al Green the Bedspread King of Long Beach rants about milk. I don’t know where they found this guy. Either Stacey Grenrock-Woods did a field piece about him, or they found him on Public Access? 

Note to Al, Cofeemate isn’t milk. ‘Crap’s not even dairy. 

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1.Fields, Robin, “Swim Pool ‘Dive Stick’ Toys Recalled,” Los Angeles Times, June 25, 1999. https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-1999-jun-25-mn-49982-story.html

[amuletrebel]

Troublemaker (Marichat Edition)

Adrien’s legs bounced as he channel-surfed, searching for the right channel. Today, Marinette announced that Jagged Stone would be on an episode of “Fill My Shoes”. The best part was that it was going to be shot in her bakery. So he got to see his crush on the big screen, becoming a star with her music icon. Suddenly, a thought struck him and he bit his thumb in contemplation. If she became famous, that meant a lot more attention. And a lot more attention meant more admirers. Which, in turn, meant more competition to scare off. He’d have to stick to Marinette like glue, hissing at any potential interloper. Then again, that would come off as creepy and Marinette would probably avoid him forever. That would shatter him! His thoughts halted when the show began. For now, he could be happy for his love. She worked with Jagged Stone before. Maybe he was just overthinking this once. She was on that magazine with Jagged when she first designed his new album. The hype didn’t gain her any new love interests, and her presence, while still stunning, didn’t skyrocket beyond school. So he could try to keep calm and watch her enjoy herself. The model laughed whenever Jagged went crazy with the bread and the ingredients. He completely drowned out Plagg insisting cheese be added to the baked goods. When Jagged accidentally poured flour over himself, it cut to commercial. Adrien slouched in his couch, a dopey grin on his face. It was nice to see Marinette enjoy herself and laugh so heartily. He could tell she was really having fun with Jagged Stones. Her parents might have a different opinion though. “Bleh,” Plagg cut in, faking a barf. “You’re not even in front of her and you’re already a gooey mess! Even the runniest cheese can’t outdo you right now!” “I can’t help it, Plagg,” the blonde responded with a lovesick sigh, “She’s just so perfect—” “And smart, and beautiful, and brave,” the kwami finished, “Blah, blah, blah. I’ve heard this line a thousand times!” Before Adrien could retort, the show was back on. But what he witnessed on screen made his jaw drop in shock. He could see Jagged Stone’s lips moving, but the only words that registered in his brain were “little crush.” Adrien hit the pause button on the remote, just to confirm this wasn’t some trick of the light or a crazy hallucination. The model recognized the light pink walls, the computer, and even the cute little trinkets that rested on the desks; all things that confirmed it was indeed Marinette’s room. But what was on those walls rendered him speechless. Pasted to the walls were dozens of photos; photos of him! Well, they weren’t of Adrien Agreste. They were of his alter ego, Chat Noir; newspaper clippings, screenshots, photos, and doodles galore! She even had some of his unofficial merchandise! Marinette, the same sweet and brave Marinette Dupain-Cheng, had a crush on Chat Noir! The gears in his blonde head turned as facts started connecting. Marinette had a crush on Chat Noir. Chat Noir was also Adrien Agreste. So by that logic, Marinette had a crush on Adrien Agreste! His princess liked him back! It was no secret that he felt freer as Chat Noir. She liked him for all his faults and flaws, which often showed when he donned the black mask. He also wasn’t worried like one might assume he would be. Certainly, she wasn’t the type of girl who liked a person for their fame. If that were the case, she would’ve fallen for him as Adrien when they first met. Plagg snickered as he flew over and floated next to Adrien’s head. “Oh, la, la~ Looks like you have a secret admirer.” “Marinette likes me…” Adrien whispered, the puzzle pieces in his head slowly coming together to form a full picture. “No,” the cheese-loving kwami sarcastically retorted, “A girl just keeps photos of one person up on her walls for the fun of it.” “She likes me!” the blonde exclaimed, shooting up from his seat. He grabbed Plagg in his clasped hands and spun around the room with a joyous laugh. “She likes me! She likes me!” “Stop! Stop! I’m gonna hurl!” This was the happiest day of his life! She liked him! Granted, she was in love with Chat Noir, but he couldn’t help but feel excited But when he resumed watching, his peridot eyes sparkling at his discovery, he witnessed Marinette burst into her room in a panic while begging everyone to leave. She was filled with anxiety and embarrassment; two qualities perfect for akumatization. Adrien paled at the thought of having to fight his Princess. He needed to get there before anything could happen to her!

“Plagg, we need to go!” Adrien exclaimed, looking at his kwami who was still in his grip. But Plagg could only see the world spinning as his swayed, feeling nauseated. “Mind if I take a minute to not throw up?”

“Come on, this is no time for joking around. Claws out!”

Chat eyed Ladybug when they had finished the job. Penny was returned to normal and Jagged was more than happy to have her back safe. But there was just this little nagging voice in the back of his head. While his partner was in the middle of detransforming, he could swear he saw a different face when he examined her profile. But it happened so fast that he couldn’t take the time to process it. For a second though, Ladybug looked like…Marinette. Could it be possible? They were admittedly alike in some ways… Nah! That wasn’t possible. Marinette was totally more legit!

“I already know who you are, Ladybug,” he teasingly commented when she asked if he saw anything.

“You do?” she asked with a hopeful edge in her voice, although he could’ve been mistaken.

“Of course.” Then he turned to her and playfully winked. “You’re the best partner a cat could ask for.”

That got a laugh out of her. They said their goodbyes afterword, going their separate ways. He propelled himself back home, excited. He wanted to pay a visit to a certain princess, but he’d have to do it at night. After detransforming, Adrien rushed to take a shower, even going so far as to put on cologne. He wanted to look his very best for her. He didn’t care if Plagg called him a dork. Because he was a dork in love with an incredible girl who loved the most important parts of him. When all was dark and not a peep resounded throughout the house, Adrien transformed and jumped all the way to Marinette’s house. When he got there, the blunette was already on her balcony. Well, she was just making this all the more perfect.

Chat landed behind her, causing her to jump slightly in shock. But she insistently relaxed when her bluebell eyes found his green ones. But then she just stiffened back up, her cheeks flushed red. The designer backed up, her spine hitting the railing.

“Ch-Chat Noir!” she exclaimed, flustered.

“Hello, Purrincess,” he greeted, a smirk resting on his face. “I watched the show and I was—”

“O-Oh, so even s-superheroes watch tv, huh?” The blunette giggled awkwardly, trying to keep her eyes on him instead of ways to escape the situation. “L-Look…about all that…stuff…”

“The pictures you mean?” he asked, wanting to get straight to the point.

“Y-yeah,” Marinette confirmed, her cheeks still ready. “I just… I really like s-superheroes and so…”

But the words died on her tongue as Chat moved closer, their faces mere inches apart. “Oh my. Is the Princess…lying~?” he smugly questioned, staring into her eyes as they widened.

“W-w-what?!” the blunette exclaimed, giving him a gentle nudge back. “N-no way! I’m not interested in you! I mean, not that you’re not interesting and all! I totally admire you and all! You’re just so brave, and fun, and sweet…And I should probably stop talking! Hahahaha…ha…”

She was just so adorable. He’d give her a break. “No worries, Princess. I totally understand.” Chat took her delicate hand in his, laying his other hand over it. He smiled gently at her, feeling the warm radiating from her hand. “If anything, I’m really glad I have a fan like you. I don’t visit just anyone on a warm summer night hoping for some treats and cuddles.” She giggled a little and he continued. “You’re honest and real. And I can’t help but admire you for that. I feel like I can myself when I’m with you. Hey, you should be calling me your biggest fan.” He let go of her hand and caressed her cheeks, leaning in. The model in disguise placed a featherlight kiss on his crush’s forehead, making her squeak in response. He smiled brightly at his shocked face and hopped onto the railing. “Good night, Princess. Thank you for being her for me.” Not looked back, Chat leapt home, a goofy grin on his face.

[lee-rambles-about-rwby]

(I wasn't really in the fandom til after volume 6 but-)

Eddy and Keirsi joining the writing team, then Eddy immediately deciding to use that power to tease things whenever possible and freak out the fandom (Keirsi too tbh)

Shopping montage hype that confused the hell out of Miles wondering why so many people thought there'd be a shopping montage

The bee selfie meme

That cursed shish kabob meme that keeps getting made longer

How in the first couple chapters of volume 7 I think it seemed like the fan favorite AceOp was Harriet (or maybe Elm) but by the end it was Marrow by a landside

"Oh my god Weiss finally won a solo fight! I'm so proud!!"

Screaming anytime Yang uses her semblance the last few volumes

T i t t y w i n d o w

When Oscar went missing again and people started saying Jaune just needs one of those wrist things that connects to a parent and toddler's wrist so the toddler can't wander off in public (complete with edits)

Alternatively: "Oh Oscar's fine. He's just shopping"

People drawing rwby characters over photos

*volume 7 intro starts for the first time* So many people: Oh my god, that's SO anime!

Also Miles and Kerry having to tweet a warning to absolutely not watch the intro before the v7ch1 and when we saw Penny in the intro everyone went "Ohhh that's why"

B a n a n a h a i r

"We're protecting each other" happened and like 90% of bee shippers had the same screenshot as a header. You know the one (like, fair enough tho)

Maria literally walked off a train and said like 6 words and most of us loved her already

*Ruby's v6 flashback montage* Fandom: Oh my god my heart! *clip of Summer* Fandom: [insert that Beyonce!? meme]

Actually no, just every raise in fandom hype over seeing a rwby mom. Summer was on screen for 5 seconds, Willow showed up for a scene, fandom screaming. I wasnt in the fandom for Kali or Raven's introductions but I can only imagine at least Kali was also followed by a lot of hype

When so many people thought the random military girl on Cordo's base had to be Neo

"This is my wife, Terra-Cotta" [fandom screaming in gay]

iconic moments in rwby fandom history:

"they're not gay... would lesbians have big boobs?"

that rwby cameo in the doctor sleep movie???

yorse. beehaw. the originals ONLY everything else you people spawned afterwards is bad i'm not sorry

"i know penny isn't coming back in the v7 premiere but i'm gonna be disappointed anyway when it doesn't happen 💔" WELL

monty's black and yellow video you know the one

dabbing weiss being everywhere

so many gay fanartists predicting blake's haircut years prior

BASICALLY NO ONE predicting raven being the spring maiden. that was just such a good twist tbh

noseless edits

that meme of ironwood looking at his scroll and screaming

"i love you yang"

"SO I HEAR YOU'RE INTO PUSSY"

when the v6 soundtrack got super delayed and everyone was impatient so when it actually came out the whiplash of nevermore AND armed and ready acoustic was almost too much

pajamjams

when crunchyroll slashed out the W in rwby in a promo for v5 and weiss got stabbed, then they did the same thing with the B in v7 and people lost their minds but then. nothing happened to blake lol

THE BELTS. THE FUCKING BELT MEMES

the overall mutual acceptance of the idea that qrow adopts every teenager he meets

whatever the hell this was:

in that one behind-the-scenes clip for v6 that had a storyboard frame of blake fighting adam before it happened, and they edited it out like 30 minutes later, but everyone had already seen it

the talk about that atlas ball we never got

bossman

the one-off unnamed rabbit faunus girl that ilia saved at haven and everyone immediately started shipping her with

after "seeing red" came out and bumbleby was #1 on the fandometrics ship tier, fucking dethroning kl*nce that had been consistently sitting on top for a year or so

NEATH BEING VAGUE ABOUT EVERYTHING ON TWITTER PLEASE STOP THIS MAN

people crying over a maple leaf haha can't relate *sobs*

when the rt servers got so overloaded during the v6 premiere that we crashed the site

"OZPIN FUCKS"

the theory that q- qrow- the theory that qrow is ruby's da- i can't even say it

the theory above dying <3

FEEL FREE TO ADD MORE

[thedappleddragon]

ugh im big stupid and haven't been posting my shit here for a while. I've still been typing it out in my notes, I just havent transferred them onto here lol. im putting it all under the cut, don't worry

Today was pretty dang nice! I spent a little time outside because it was nice and warm out, I drew a little in my sketchbook and digitally rendered a picture of Anna’s new princess outfit, ran an errand with my mom to pick up a graphing calculator and a pack of soda, ate some Wendy’s, and did a lot of sewing for my dress! I joined the bodice lining and exterior, and did a little over half of the sewing for the skirt. I’m doing French seams so there’s no raw edges on the inside, so I still have to iron it and go over the second round of stitches. My machine malfunctioned for a moment with the thread tangling up in the lower bobbin thingy, so I left it alone for like an hour and it fixed itself lol. I’m very happy with how the bodice came out after clipping all the extra fabric in the corners and test fitting it. I think it’ll be great when it’s done!! Although I may or may not need to seam rip a little bit of the skirt to extend the zipper down so I can get it over my fuckin DUMPTRUCK when putting it on. Right now there’s enough stretch to put it on, but Idk how well that’ll stay after attaching the 2 pieces. Also it might end up making me look fat/preggo in the end with how the skirt lays lmao. I also did a really quick test fit with the sleeves, and I might actually like it better sleeveless? I’ll put one on anyway and go from there to see which I like better. HOORAY this dress has pockets!! But I may have put them a little low lol. I wanted to do a big dress debut at prom, but turns out graduates aren’t allowed due to covid restrictions :( so that really sucks. But we’re still gonna hang out a little bit beforehand, and I can still do a debut. I made a little bow out of some scrap dress fabric, which I want to put in my hair for pre-prom. I think I’ll braid my hair, maybe get some fake flowers from dollar tree and ribbon to add somehow, and put the ribbon either at the bottom or the top, wherever the hair tie eventually goes. I’m so exited to work on it more. I’m kinda running out of white thread tho so I’ll have to get more. Later in the evening i got hungry and made ramen while my dad and I watched a documentary on some of the horrible shit that went on all around the world during 2020, some of which I had forgotten about, some that was really surreal and out of a dystopian movie, and some stuff that was just upsetting to watch. It was still pretty good tho. I got work tomorrow and I’m really sleepy even tho it’s only 12:30 so I think I’m gonna grab a snack and go to sleep soon. Gnight mwah

Yesterday I worked and sewed until I ran out of thread and drew a little bit. Spent most of my shift watering flowers, then I went home and ate for a moment, then watered more and picked dead flowers and talked about avatar and other animated shows with the highschool girl I work with. Came home and hung out for a while, that evening made some good pasta. 

Today I justly hung out, then went with mom to pick up a bookshelf and went through strawtown which I thought was a very funny name for a town. There was a cute antique shop in there tho. On the way back we stopped in a sewing shop called Always in stitches. I expected it to be a very small shop, but it was SO much bigger than I thought it would be. They had tons of fabric and quilting supplies, and lots of old ladies working and talking. I picked up a cone of white thread and a fabric sample pack. Then I sewed my dress a little bit. I still have lots to do, and only like 2.5 days to do it. I’ll get there tho. All I have to do is add the skirt hem, add the pockets back in (I took them out so I could see them in normally), add sleeves and hem them, and add the zipper. And attach the skirt to the bodice. I think I’ll be able to do it. I had yogurt for the first time in forever today. Tbh I used just enough to hold together the strawberry and granola bits kgelgskgs. It was pretty good tho. I drew ELEVEN pages in my sketchbook, about 8 of them being a comic about the pony au of our royalty au. I could have done the comic with human characters but ponies are so much easier to draw aggsssdh. I spent 40 minutes typing out the dialogue and editing it on top of the rest of the comic so my friend could read it, but she still hasn’t read my text :( oh well that’s fine lol. The original plot was supposed to be Sam talking to an accidental illusion of me being mean about her blight, but then I accidentally made it something different. I might just draw the alternate ending instead. Update I just did

Yesterday I sewed and went to Menards to buy tile for moms bathroom.

Today was VERY productive, I feel like. I woke up and immediately took a shower and did laundry. I spent some one just sitting on my bed scrolling and researching while listening to medieval remixes of songs lol. At some point I went out to buy subway for everyone and stopped at dollar tree for nail polish and satin ribbon. I made the ribbon into a little choker and wanted to use it for the hem of the skirt, but I was too short. In total I spent HOURS hemming and pinning and seam ripping and ironing and sewing today, but it’s still not done. I gotta kick my ass into high gear if it’s gone be done by Sunday afternoon. I started sewing the bottom hem, but my machine has been doing this weird thing where the fabric scrunches up right past the sewing foot and leaves wrinkles and gathers so loose I can move it around with my hands easily. I think it’s just my tension being too tight or something, I adjusted it a bit and I’ll test it in the morning. I’m too tired and it’s too late at night to be doing that much sewing. I seam ripped the entire back skirt seam so I could extend the zipper a little further down, and I’ll sew it back up once the hem is done. After that all I need to donis connect the skirt to the bocice, fix the zipper, and hem the arm holes. I don’t want to use the sleeves I made because the edges don’t line up at all and I don’t think I would be able to lift my arms, the way it’s built. The nail polish I picked up works way better than I thought it would, leaving a pretty good metallic sheen after just one coat. Way better than I thought for a dollar. I helped mom lay down tile a little bit, ripping up one old tile and helping a bit at a time throughout the day. I kept asking if she wanted help with the actual tiling part but she said no. We also couldn’t get the fuckin box cutter I bought to work. It’s supposed to be easy to replace the blade, but we couldn’t figure it out lol. I’m falling asleep fun. Washed my face twice, trying to take good care of myself before prom so I look good in photos. Gotta wash hair tomorrow. Made hamburger meat

Spent all day sewing and listening to bardcore remixes. Dress is as done as I bother to make it rn

Tbh I was hoping for a little more for today. I’ve spent the last like week or longer working towards this, and going especially in depth the past 3 days. I got all silky smooth, worked for hours on my dress, thought about pretty much nothing except prom day. I was late because my dad had my neighbor come over to take pictures of me in my dress. I thought it was just going to be her holding my dad’s phone to get a picture of us together, but she brought her whole ass professional camera and spent several minutes taking pictures. Then I took the weirdest way possible to get to my friend’s house on accident because google maps said it was the fastest way to get there. But HEY when I did get there I enjoyed hanging out with my friends. We ate some dinner AND??? Sammie I’m sorry if you’re reading this but THE MASHED POTATOES?? WERE S O BLAND????? AFAJSTSTHJST ily but girl. Just a little salt could have gone a long way <3 the steak and especially the green bean casserole were good tho :) dinner was good with the sparkling juice and little desert. Overall everything was just very loud, but that’s to be expected when this is everyone’s first time seeing each other in a goddamn while: actually I think they’ve all seen each other at school without me but hey whatever. I think I fucked up my phone screen on accident by sitting on it while it was in my pocket with my keys, leaving a spiderweb crack in it. I checked and yeah it’s not just the screen protector :( eh I don’t care that much, It didn’t fuck up the lcd screen or anything. We went up to Sam’s room and hung out and talked while she did Liz’s makeup and took pictures, and I borrowed a little of her concealer before photos. There was a little photo shoot in their front yard, and looking at the photos I look a little fat in them but I LOVE all the photos taken in Sam’s room where we were all just hanging out. Idk why but whenever you have to do photos and they say to do a silly one, it never turns out good, but the fun ones you casually take always turn out way better. They’re more genuine :) but then it was time for everyone to go to prom and for me to go home 😔 we only hung out for like an hour and a half. I didn’t want to take off my dress, seeing as I put in so much effort to sew the whole dress and shave and look pretty, so I wore it around the house for a bit until I got tired and went to lay in bed. I watched the mitchels vs the machines, which is a fuckin DELIGHTFUL movie!! Everybody go watch it it’s so cute <3 I also played some Pokémon and watched a little YouTube in bed, but feeling unfulfilled and wanting to do something different, I just didn’t know what. So instead I started typing this up as my sister brought me a cupcake from prom :) I had a bite and put the rest in the fridge, since it was so big and in a plastic container. I texted a friend over Snapchat asking if they had fun at prom, and they said it was kinda ass. I tried relating and saying yeah all school dances are a little ass, and my friend group once had anti prom and played dnd instead, but they just said ‘that’s nice’ back and idk if that means they’re annoyed at me or they’re just tired and didn’t wanna text or what but :( idk. Either way it’s fine, right now all I care about is going to bed. Gnight I guess. Also I keep thinking about that textpost that’s like “diary of icarly” and she talks in these simple-ass sentences and now I feel self conscious about how I write these snafnfs. I already know I write like a child in these, but that’s just because I don’t wanna go through the effort of making this sound nice and professional every day lmao. So child writing it is. Also painted my nails really horribly and it took forever to clean up which made me late

Woke up, went to work, spent a little time stocking, watered indoor plants, then attempting to work the register, and organized plants the rest of the time. I stood behind one of my coworkers as she checked people out, kind of understanding what she was doing but not that much, and read the manual in down periods. She had me check out a couple people, and it was NERVE WRACKING AS HELL. Thankfully everyone was very nice, and my coworker stood by and helped, and right as I was getting my foothold, my boss called for me to work outside and bring in the new shipment of plants. BUT YOU KNOW WHAT WAS REALLY NICE?? I was actually able to help some people today!! :D I’m slowly getting better at my job which is nice :) originally I was only gonna work 4 hours, but there were more plants to get and I felt like I could keep going, so I ended up working 6 instead. Every time I come home from the end of my shift I feel bad for not working more and like I should have stayed longer. Tbh I think I could do it if I had a proper break! I’ve been doing 4 hour shifts with maybe a water break in the middle because i don’t know how to ask to go on break ;-; Ike my secondary boss in the garden center is super nice and approachable and friendly but the main boss is like. Terrifying. I never know when he’s joking or being serious and I don’t understand him and assffsfamms it SUCKS. But whatever, I went home and ate some Mac n cheese and laid in bed because my back hurt and played on my ds for the rest of the night. I tried a couple new games, none of which I spent very long on. I tried okami den where you’re the wolf puppy child of the precious games protagonist I think, and idk maybe I’ll give it a better try in the future, but I wasn’t feelin it. I spent like 30 minutes on a pro bass fishing simulator and couldn’t clear the first level because the fish wouldn’t get close enough to my boat lmao. Sonic and Mario at the Olympic Games was fun until I lost at table tennis to Mario. I’d play it again. But I have work again tomorrow so I gotta go to bed good night. Having to blast my fan and play drawfee on my phone to drown out moms tv again >:(

Ate a pbj for breakfast? Went to work, moved plants around, took my lunch break, went to subway with an expired coupon, ate at home and times it perfectly so I could watch one section of the new drawfee episode, went back to work, made myself sad thinking about the god girl homunculus from fullmetal alchemist, picked dead flowers off the petunias, left a little early, hung out at home, left to go get mom’s medicine, found my dad at the store, followed him around and shopped for a bit, can home to unload everything, talked with him about buying one of the cars from him so it would be under mom’s insurance after the divorce, talked about being able to hang out at dads apparent after we help him move, ate some of the stuff we bought, and now I’m hanging out in bed again. I picked up my Pokémon black save and played a while today which was nice. I think I’m gonna work more in the next few days, be really busy with shit for like a week, and finally have a breather after the 15th. I really need to switch brain gears back into college stuff soon so I can sign up for orientation and figure out finances and shit, but for now it’s midnight and I don’t have to think about it lol

Today was pretty good, but also pretty boring. I played Pokémon all day since I didn’t have work, cooked some hamburger meat, and went on an errand for mom but got the wrong thing so I went out later to buy the right thing. I got spicy chicharrones instead of regular ones oops. On my drive back from getting the right thing, I rolled all my windows down and loved the feeling of driving around right after sunset when the weather was nice but cool, especially after standing in mom’s loud-ass room trying to ask about her bank card. I thought about going back out to aimlessly drive around the park and back, but instead hung out in my kitchen as my cat fell asleep on my lap. I think I’m gonna get paid tomorrow, so that’s exciting :D I probably made a solid couple hundred dollars if I had to guess. Idk what I’m getting paid per hour, but it’s probably ~$10 and I COULD go through my texts again to see how much I’ve worked, but I don’t really wanna lmao. I should just start putting that in my notes app instead...

Just had probably the most involved, longest dream ever?? It was a mix of infinity train and dangenrompa, we were mostly stuck inside my house, one boy left for years to search for supplies, I tried biking along a tail that disappeared into tree roots and a ditch with grass, cried because we had been in the same car for so long I was afraid they were gonna make us kill someone to get past, and at the end we escaped or something and had to fuck up security cameras and get past loopholes and lots of cereal boxes were involved? Idk there’s just so much I don’t remember. I wasn't sure if I had to go to work today, so I sent my boss a text and just kinda hung out. was making  hamburger meat for my mom when my boss called asking me to come in, so I took a shower and worked from 1-5. spent some time at the register, and got way better at checking stuff out :) I learned a couple things, and there was one old lady in particular who was very patient and nice to me while my coworker went to go find a smaller bag of birdseed. when it stopped being busy inside, I went ut to the garden center to help price plants and spent the rest of my shift out there. I got paid too! $9 an hour, 22 hours, $200 in total. hell yeah. not bad, although I literally have no frame of reference on if this Is good or not. after work I went home for a second, then got Hardee’s (or carls jr in the western states). I used a coupon for chicken tenders for me and my sister :) and while I was driving around today, I found myself wishing that everything in life could be as smooth and easy as driving my car through my neighborhood. and then I kinda laughed thinking about how I cried my first time driving on a major road asdjfasjdhf. but seriously I love driving my dad’s silver Volvo!! its so comfy with 4 wheel drive and good petal control, its like always driving on freshly paved roads <3 unfortunately that's the car my dad is taking when he moves into his apartment to use as his full time car instead of his shit-ass blue Volvo, and we’re gonna be stuck with the red Volvo with a really touchy gas pedal and slow break pedal. (idk if you've noticed but we really love old Volvos in this family. they’re all old and boxy as hell and I love em <3 ) then I played Pokemon black and beat the elite 4 and champion in one try with a lot of revives lmao. I was kinda underleveled, right at 48-50 range, same as them. I was angry about stuff and in pain earlier in the shower as I washed my hair, but I dont remember exactly what it was. now I have my soft Spotify playlist going so I can maybe go to sleep soon. oh wait I remember being angry that all I could thin about all day was work, even tho it only takes up a few hours of my day, and then I do nothing all day afterwards. idk it’s just weird.

[clove-teasdale]

survival of the fittest

*:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧

A/N: not a challenge but has background, some detective clove and rp~ Sorry for any mistakes in writing or typos, I was done with revisions and probs missed some stuff lol. there are mulan and batman (and slight marvel) references. italics section in the end is past. word count around 3k. enjoy! ft. rp with @maya-edwards  & little wilson

[edit--some slight changes were made/added in the last section]

*:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧

One earbud in, I tapped the pen against my notebook. 6 Twos in the last Selection. Gradually less than our current 10.

I’d found the list of old Selected in a magazine published over two decades ago. I doubted ripping off the page was allowed considering it was from the library, but it wasn’t an actual book so I sneaked it out anyway. The possibility of someone noticing was extremely low after all.

I kept the page folded and clipped in the back cover of my notebook in case I needed it later, but had already made my own version of the list on a fresh page. I wanted to work through it even with other people around, so I knew I had to make it visually confusing. For once my love for complicated plans came in handy. 

The list consisted of name abbreviations. Carmen Zoraya becoming C.Z and so on. Next, to each name, I added caste number and week of elimination. 

C.Z-3-W8.  R.D.J.-2-W12 B.M-5-W3

Getting the information had taken me hours of reading in the library, but I’d managed. I went through different magazines, hidden between some pillars and a bookshelf to avoid being spotted by other girls that frequented the area. Organizing the old issues by their dates had probably been the biggest challenge–sitting on the carpeted floor, my back to the bookshelf and dozens of magazines on my lap.

I focused mostly on reading eliminations to get the crucial information out, but I hoped to go back later in the week to read about the dramas that had ensued during those months. Maybe that would give some extra insight otherwise dismissed when looking only at the bigger picture.

I wasn’t sure why I was still working on this. A gut feeling? Many psychologists debated there was always information and data our right brain was taking in, no matter if our left brain was busy on something else. The body registers the information even when your mind stays unaware. If that were true, what had I noticed besides the already obvious? I couldn’t tell, but it didn’t matter. I had enough spare time to work on it.

Running through the names again, I added strikes under Threes. I was in the eighth strike when I caught a girl approaching from the corner of my eye. She was the embodiment of nervousness, eyes searching the room as she clutched a book to her chest. There was an empty spot next to me, but she hadn’t noticed it yet when Victoria walked behind her. The TV sensation hadn’t even batted an eye in her direction, but the girl with the short afro was startled nonetheless.

The book was soon in the air as she juggled it around in an attempt to catch it. She wasn’t as swift as a coursing river though and it fell to the ground pretty quickly. 

She sighed, shoulders slumping in disappointment. I stared in silence, making sure others hadn’t paid much attention to the event before stating, “I think you dropped something.”

She was startled once more, but this time by my voice, a groan leaving her lips as she realized the spectacle had had an audience. “You saw all that, didn’t you…”

“Does it make it any better if I say no?”

She reached for the book and once standing, nodded a little, a worried frown as she said, “A-actually yes…”

I raised an eyebrow at her fear, unsure of the reason behind it, but settled with an “Okay,” and went back to my notes. I knew the best thing was not to make any further comments.

“Can I, uh- Can I sit here?” She asked after a moment.

I stopped in the middle of adding another strike to the number of Threes and considered the question. Staring at my notes without context made no sense as expected, so I figured it wasn’t a problem. “The seat is open to the public, you may sit.”

Whether she understood my slightly joking tone or not was hard to tell, but she cleared her throat and sat down either way. “Thanks…”

I’d seen her around before. Maya was her name if I remembered correctly. Sometimes she seemed kind of lost. Not like she didn’t know what was happening, but more like she wasn’t sure why she was there or what her plan was. A combination of shy and awkward was very likely.

Easy targets tend to know what they are. Wilson’s face crossed my mind at the thought. I took the single earbud I was wearing off, then went back to counting Threes. “No need to thank me. You didn’t need my permission to sit there.”

“Uh, well…Maybe you didn’t want company or- maybe it was taken?”

“Whether I want company or not should not scare you away from taking a seat that is there to be used by you.”

She frowned, considering my words. “I suppose not?” A moment of silence. “Sorry?”

I paused my count. So one of those people. Looking up, I raised an eyebrow at her. “Why sorry?”

Her own logic caught up with mine as she stuttered, “Uh-well- I don’t know…” 

Trying to run away from embarrassment, she quickly opened her book and pretended to read. Too bad she wasn’t good at pretending. 

I smirked down at my notes and said, “I see you have the ability of reading upside down.”

Her blush was unmistakable as she closed her eyes, realizing she was holding the book incorrectly. She tried to fix it, turning it over quickly. “No-Yes, yes, very entertaining, I can tell you.” She cleared her throat at the end and my smirk didn’t leave.

“Mhmm, I bet so. What did you think about the love interest killing his sister?”

“It really uh, turned the story ‘upside down’…”

I snorted at the pun. “Of course… you do realize that doesn’t happen though?” Taking the book from her and reading the page at the bottom I pointed out, “Page 56. The love interest isn’t introduced yet.” Also, there was no sister. Closing the book, I handed it back with a smug smile. Her smile in return was awkward.

“Well, it was worth a try? Sor– I mean, eh the book is nice then? Haven’t read it yet.”

“I figured as much, but yes, it’s a decent one. What made you pick it up?”

“I dropped it? So… Then I picked it up again?” She frowned and a head tilt followed. I frowned too, not getting what she was talking about at first, but then laughing at the mistake.

Once she realized what I meant she was quick to explain she hoped to get some knowledge on palace rules and etiquette considering the setting of the book. In theory, it sounded like something good, but it wasn’t going to be enough and she actually had access to books about the subject in the library. I suggested those for later. She pointed out they were boring in a small voice and I couldn’t disagree. I did tell her a novel wouldn’t help much, however.

“I know, I know…” She pouted, but soon curiosity took over her features. “What are you doing though?”

I stared at my barely understandable handwriting. I had the potential to make it neat if I bothered to try, but half the time I didn’t and especially not now. “A… personal project I guess.” I shrugged it off as I closed the notebook. “Nothing too important.”

“O-of course! I didn’t mean to uh–…” She vaguely gestured with her hands in the air when I waited for her to continue. “You know, to be rude.”

“It’s alright, not that big a deal, just something I don’t think I’d be able to explain.“ A partial lie. I didn’t want to start havoc just because I’d run a couple of numbers that could technically still be coincidental. Thankfully, I usually pulled off keeping things to myself pretty well. “You’re Maya, right?”

“Yes! And you’re Clove.” She smiled, taking another second to remember to offer a hand for me to shake. 

I nodded at the name and accepted the handshake. It wasn’t a soft grip, but slightly wary. She could use a little confidence. “You know, you shouldn’t be so frightened by them. They won’t bite you.”

I hadn’t mentioned Victoria’s name, but she got what I meant, biting her lip and trying to joke to dismiss my comment. I wasn’t too impressed. “I mean it.” I opened my notebook, this time on a random page, and started doodling a spiral pattern out of habit. “They seem like they’ll hurt you but if anyone was that mean sabotage would already be happening.  Worse case scenario maybe one of them is that petty, but you’d have to piss them off for real to worry about it.”

Maya nodded. “It sounds logical… Thanks anyway.”

That smile was more convincing than the previously given, even if she changed the subject after it. 

It took a few seconds for Wilson to stop laughing. “Oh wait, you’re serious?”

Even if he couldn’t see it through the call, I rolled my eyes at him. “You talk as if I can’t make friends.”

“Well, I mean… you can, but you hate them most of the time.”

That got a snort from me. “I don’t hate them. I just don’t trust their intentions.”

“Same difference. Clove Teasdale doesn’t make friends.”

That was a partial truth. I had various friend groups during high school and middle school, but none of them stuck with me. I was that person people wanted to be friends with, but not for any good reasons. It was because we fitted or because it was expected. Other times it was just convenient. Sometimes I wondered if maybe it was me though. Maybe I didn’t know how to be a good friend. That or I had really bad luck.

People at Mt. Rainer High School always seemed to strike some drama no matter what the clique. More often than not, about something I couldn’t understand, but whenever I gave suggestions to make things less complicated I was ignored, an annoyance, or horrible for not supporting a side.

When groups fractured I took a step back. Better alone than in a mess. Wilson had never understood why I’d give it all up and move on so fast, but I didn’t blame him. He knew that it was a smart choice to avoid drama, yet wished he could have that choice himself. He didn’t. He wasn’t really liked around school and therefore had only one friend...Which wasn't that different from me except I could pretend more.

Students liked to say it was because he was kind of a nerd. He knew as much as I did that it was because of his previous Caste though, even if no one would admit so. It was kinda dumb. As dumb as the caste system itself–trying to set a number with the life you’ll get–forcing a talented artist to become a teacher and a physics genius to be Picasso.

Not everyone could pull off a Da Vinci and be good at whatever they were put in. Many people failed because of that. Others were like Wilson’s mother, giving up the life she was born in for a life as a Three with whom she fell in love with. That left Wilson as nothing but a Two by chance. Terrible, dreadful chance that he never even asked for and would probably give up to get his parents back.

I leaned against my chair and got back to our conversation. “Statistically speaking, most people that stay friends are from college so…”

He pretended to be offended. “Ouch.”

”You’re decent enough. But as I was saying, I’ll try to befriend some of the girls. This isn’t school.”

“Hmm, you’re right. Everyone here sucks.”

“Even Graciela?” I teased, remembering the name I’d gotten out of him a few days ago. He scoffed back at me.

“No, she hasn’t been corrupted yet.”

“Now you just have to actually talk to her.”

He laughed for the second time. I was silent. “Oh, you’re serious again.”

I shook my head. “You’re a lost cause, kid.”

It was the middle of freshman year when we met for the first time.

I was placing books in my backpack, my head making a list of the homework for the next day when Cooper pushed him into a set of lockers feet away. I turned my head in the direction of who would one day be the future varsity quarterback as he took care of the new wimpy kid. 

Cooper wasn’t really original, trying as hard as possible to go for the popular-jock-bully stereotype as soon as the school year started. Intimidating middle schoolers and stealing lunch money he didn’t even need. It was hard to ignore sometimes, but I did.

Pressing my lips together, I watched as he stepped away to laugh at the boy, inciting his two friends to join him on whatever joke he’d made. Obviously, they did. Cooper’s father was a high ranking officer in the military. He had everything he needed to be on a high pedestal in school one day, which was annoying. 

I was on the list of few who ever stood up to him since we’d once been friends. That is before he filled his head with air. The brief moment I got to look at his new prey was enough to recognize the black haired kid holding tightly onto the strap of his backpack with a clenched jaw. 

His eyes darted from Cooper to the floor around him, head hidden between his shoulders. I’d seen that face in a million pictures around Mrs. Grayson’s house after my chess classes with her. It was her grandson, the one she always referred to as little robin. Apparently, the kid ran around saying “holy cows, Batman” more than he should when he was seven.

She told my parents he would move in with her soon, being the legal guardian his parents’ had asked for. “Car accident,” she’d mentioned. I had already spotted him in our algebra class a few times that week. He seemed advanced enough to take it before high school which only made him a bigger target.

Cooper nudged him, “Come on, that was hilarious.” Little Robin didn’t seem to have the same spirit Mrs. Grayson always talked about now and only gulped, averting his gaze. Cooper didn’t leave him though. “Cat got your tongue or something? I’ve never heard you say anything in class.” He towered over him, making him press his back even closer to the lockers.

I narrowed my eyes at them and walked over. I hadn’t precisely told Mrs. Grayson I would keep an eye out for him, but I felt like I needed to on her behalf. Sometimes she’d served as a babysitter of sorts when my parents traveled together. She was good to me. 

I elbowed Cooper’s friends out of the way and they gave angry glares until they recognized me. They decided to step away instead so I stood behind Cooper and tapped his shoulder.

“What-” he paused mid-sentence as he turned around, eyes locking on me, annoyed for the split second he realized I wasn’t one of his friends. Jaw clenched, he stood up straighter and then mumbled my name between a gritted-teeth smile. “Anything I can help you with?”

“What do you think you’re doing?” I asked, flatly.

He offered a charming smile. “Oh, just asking the genius for some tutoring classes. You know how bad I’m at Algebra. I thought I might as well ask him to teach me some stuff. Right George?” He elbowed the kid for a sign of confirmation.

I was pretty sure his name wasn’t George, yet Little Robin didn’t correct him either as he spared me a glance himself. There was a pause long enough to tell Cooper was lying. And though I knew that much already, in the end, the boy thought it was wiser to agree halfheartedly to the lie. Survival of the fittest. He wouldn’t disagree after Cooper established himself as an authority so firmly.

I remained silent, thinking of how to turn the situation around. The kid was new, he didn’t know what to do. It was like a game of poker. Bluff even if you don’t have the upper hand.

“He can’t tutor you,” I stated, earning a confused frown from both.

“And why is that?” Cooper crossed his arms, puffing out his chest. Good thing this wasn’t a matter of physical strength, and if it were, a strategy could give leverage either way.

“Because I asked him to tutor me already.” My turn to lie.

The boy blinked, trying to read between the lines of our conversation while Cooper narrowed his eyes at me. “I didn’t think you needed help with math, Clove.”

“Well, I do, and he promised to help me out.” I looked at the boy. “Right kid?”

Again he only blinked. 

Your turn to join the game Robin, don’t disappoint. It took him another second, but his eyes lit up with understanding and he stood up straighter. “Yeah, I um…I did.” 

Cooper glared at him and the kid broke eye contact, however, didn’t slump against the lockers anymore. Then the glowering was at me. 

I only raised my eyebrows in response, inciting a move from Cooper. His lip twitched, jaw set as I stared up at him. He knew better than to make a scene. I’d tied his hands. He couldn’t force Wilson to tutor him if I claimed he’d agreed to tutor me first. Bringing in a teacher to ‘settle the situation’ was possible if I wanted too. There was no way for him to win.

Knowing how to pick his battles, he turned around to leave but I stopped him. “Wait.”

“What?” he groaned.

I crossed my arms. “Did you take any money from him?”

His eyes flashed as he swiveled around. I waited. He let out a breath through his nose before placing a grin on his face to hide unwillingness. If there was something Cooper hated was letting others know someone had been able to push his buttons.

He turned to the boy, taking a few bills out of his pocket, and forced his voice to sound friendly. “Hey, thanks for lending me the money kid, but turns out I might not need it anymore.” 

The boy stared at the money like it was on fire, but accepted its returns when he noticed my head gesture and the jock’s angry gaze. 

“Happy now,” Cooper muttered afterward. I shrugged and he stormed off as soon as he could, followed by the other two jerks. Once they were gone I looked back at him.

“You okay?”

His head snapped back in my direction. “What just..”

I didn’t let him finish the question and simply announced, “He lost the game.” 

His mouth opened to reply. Nothing came out and I glanced at my watch. If I didn’t get moving I’d have no chance to eat. “Stay out of his way and you’ll be fine.”

“Um… y-yeah, alright. Thanks.”

I nodded. “Clove Teasdale.”

“Geordi Wilson.”

George would have been better… I sized him up. His uniform was in pristine form: shirt tucked in, vest ironed to perfection, hair combed neatly and shoes as shiny as they could be. Not bad by any means, but definitely like he was trying too hard. He would need some help to survive around here.

I turned around to leave. “Stick with Wilson, kid.”

[brokehorrorfan]

Blu-ray Review: Popcorn

You probably wouldn’t guess by watching it, but Popcorn suffered from a number of production troubles before its release in 1990. The director was replaced midway through production, and the lead actress suffered the same fate soon after. Producer Bob Clark (director of Black Christmas, A Christmas Story, Porky's) is said to have had a lot of input on the direction as well. Shooting in Jamaica also proved to be problematic. It's amazing that the film turned out as good as it did.

When a college's modest film department needs to raise money and awareness, the students devise a plan to host an all-night horror movie marathon as the last show at a historic local theater before its torn down. More than a simple screening, the students make a full experience out of the swansong, complete with costumes, decorations, and re-creations of the campy films' William Castle-esque gimmicks. The packed and excitable audience filled with rowdy college kids eats it up.

Among the collection of vintage movie memorabilia loaned to the students by local film historian Dr. Mnesyne (Ray Walston, My Favorite Martian) is an old film print. It contains the only existing footage from an infamous movie in which its director, Lanyard Gates (Matt Falls, one of the film's special makeup effects artists), killed his family in front of a live audience. This strikes a chord with Maggie (Jill Schoelen, The Stepfather), one of the group's aspiring filmmakers, who has been seeing the man in her dreams.

Popcorn was clearly inspired by the success of the A Nightmare on Elm Street franchise; it features a hideously burned killer who appears in a girl's dreams, and her parents know more than they let on. Even the eerie musical cue, composed by Paul Zaza (A Christmas Story, Prom Night), is vaguely similar to Freddy Krueger's theme. But Popcorn exhibits several advantages that make it more memorable than the glut of Elm Street wannabes.

I'm not sure it would be entirely accurate to classify Popcorn as a horror-comedy, as it doesn't often play for laughs, but the material is approached with its tongue planted firmly in cheek. The clips from the films within the film - the titillating lineup includes Mosquito in 3D "Project-o-Scope," The Attack of the Amazing Electrified Man in "Shock-o-Scope," and The Stench in "Aroma-rama" - are just as entertaining as the main movie. They're pitch-perfect send-ups to 1950s B-movies.

Not unlike Scream, being a movie buff adds a layer of fun to Popcorn. The film also looks better than many of its peers, thanks in no small part to cinematographer Ronnie Taylor (Gandhi, Tommy). It's not particularly gory, but there are some fine practical special effects, supervised by Georgio Ferrari (Lord of the Flies) and Robert Clark (Godzilla, Starship Troopers). Zaza's score mixes orchestral music to match the '50s movies with then-current electronic compositions.

Bob Clark initially tapped his longtime friend and horror collaborator Alan Ormsby (Cat People, Children Shouldn't Play with Dead Things) to write and direct the film. Roughly three weeks into production, however, Ormsby was removed from the director's chair and replaced by Mark Herrier (who’s better known for playing Billy in Porky’s). It's also speculated that Clark also had a heavy influence on the direction, similar to Steven Spielberg's involvement in Poltergeist.

To muddle things further, original star Amy O'Neill was replaced after filming for about a week, with the capable Schoelen filling her shoes. The cast also includes quintessential '80s mom Dee Wallace (E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial, Cujo) as Maggie's mother, Derek Rydall (Phantom of the Mall: Eric's Revenge) as Maggie's love interest, Kelly Jo Minter (A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child) and Malcolm Danare (Christine) as members of the film club, and Tony Roberts (Annie Hall) as their professor.

After being out of print on DVD for many years, Popcorn is available on Blu-ray and DVD from Synapse Films. Released as a limited edition SteelBook earlier this year, standard Blu-ray and DVD versions are now available. Well worth the wait, the release boasts a new 2K scan of a 35mm interpositive vault element and a 7.1 surround sound mix (as well as the original 2.0 audio), along with reversible artwork.

A 57-minute documentary discusses the film's production troubles, featuring input from Herrier, Schoelen, Rydall, Wallace, Danare, Falls, Zaza, actors Ivette Soler and Elliott Hurst, and distributor executive Jonathan Wolf. I always prefer edited-together featurettes over individual interviews, and this one plays nicely. An audio commentary with Herrier, Schoelen, Danare, and Falls is a bit slow and repeats a lot of information from the interviews, so if you only have time for one stick to the featurette. Bruce Glover (Chinatown), who stars in one of the films within the film, is the subject of a separate interview. Extras are rounded out by trailers, TV spots, and a still gallery.

Living up to its title, Popcorn is a good popcorn movie. When else will you hear Police Academy 5 compared to the work of Ingmar Bergman? The film goes beyond the prerequisite slasher tropes by offering a little more substance, even if the story is needlessly complicated. Overcoming the hardships faced in production, Popcorn is a cult classic that deserves to be celebrated like the films within it.

Popcorn is available now on Blu-ray and DVD via Synapse Films.

[peachgreenteelemonade]

happiest little doggo

a dan and phil phanfiction

Why had he decided running was a good idea?  Dan panted as he jogged very slowly around regents park.   Okay maybe it was good for his mental health, but without someone to keep him company his legs felt like they had heavy weights strapped to them and the crisp late summer air felt like gelatin.  At least he’d gotten some twitter content out of it, that little lego man had really sang to his dark, cynical soul, and he stopped for a a few minutes (fifteen was a few) to check the replies.

This giant, soft, noodle body wasn’t meant for any sort of exercise, Dan thought as he checked his phone for the two hundredth time, slowing to a power walk.  Why couldn’t running at least be interesting?  Dan wished he was talented enough to exercise and scroll through tumblr at the same time.

Phil had known this was gonna happen.  The his boyfriend had laughed when Dan mentioned going out to exercise without a buddy.  Dan had felt so affronted, he could run if he wanted too, sure maybe he usually needed some other incentive, but he could motivate himself just fine!  He was an adult!  He let his annoyance fuel him as he started to lopsidedly jogging again, his gigantic feet slapping on the pavement.  

To be completely honest, Phil hadn’t been discouraging.  He’d laughed a little, but it had been more amused than anything.

“You’re serious?” He’d asked as he poured himself his third cup of coffee, his blue eyes incredulous.

“Yes, what’s so strange about that?”  Dan had asked while he pulled his running shoes on his clown sized feet.  “I can run anytime I want to.”

“Of course you can,” Phil had agreed, walking over to his laptop.  “I’m honestly just surprised you’re going outside instead of doing aerobics in the gaming room.  No one even had to lure you with a dog this time.”

“Oh ha ha,” Dan grumbled as Phil laughed.  “You know, you could come with me.”

“Yeah I love you and I’m glad you’ve realized exercise is good for you, but that’s not happening,” Phil’s pink tongue peeked out of the side of his mouth as he sat down to edit and Dan tried to mask his fondness with an eye-roll.

Stupid Phil, he could do what he wanted.  Dan thought in time to the beat of his feet on the pavement.  But he was regretting it now, maybe he could have stayed inside and done jumping jacks while Phil laughed at him for shaking the house.  

Dan checked his phone again.  20 minutes was long enough right?  Dan disregarded the fact that most of that had been spent on his phone and he turned to head home.  He stopped in his tracks though as he saw something furry in the middle of the street.  

His eyes shot straight to the mangy dog as if he was a dog-finding-machine and he jogged toward the creature before he even thought about it.  

The big dog was darting in between cars as car horns honked and tires screeched, but luckily Dan  ran in front of the car and it skidded to a stop instead of hitting the animal.

“Hey!”  A big burly man hollered, honking his horn from his truck, “Don’t run out in the middle of the fucking street!”  Dan just flipped him the bird as he knelt down in front of the dog.

“Hey puppy,” he murmured, “let’s get out of the street why don’t we.”  The dog just panted as Dan scratched its chest and he could feel its little heart pumping with adrenaline.  Luckily, the dog followed the tall man out of the street and sat quietly as Dan sat on a bench and examined the animal for identification.  

But its neck was free of anything but matted fur and probably a couple of fleas.

“No owner, huh,” Dan said, looking into the dogs brown eyes and scratching its floppy ears.  Its tail tentatively started to wag.  “That must have been scary, I’m glad a saw you.”  The dog whined a little as if in response and pressed up against Dan’s bare, hairy knee.  “Oh no,” Dan hummed, “Phil’s gonna kill me.”

He was keeping this dog.

***

The dog seemed to be quite attached to Dan too if the way she (yes she was a girl, he’d checked) followed him as he walked briskly to the nearest pet store was any indication.

“Come on doggo,” Dan said as the dog looked up from where she trotted beside him and he reached down and gave her a little scratch on the back of her neck.  “Let’s get you cleaned up and pretty,” he looked into her adoring puppy eyes, ���you’re gonna be such a pretty girl.  I can see it already.”  Her long pink tongue rolled out of her mouth and she almost looked like she was grinning.  Dan felt warmth spark in his chest and he smiled, not caring about his dimple.  Exercise really was better with someone to keep him company.

***

Fortunately, the pet shop was only a few blocks away and when he got there the cashier knew everything he needed to get.

“We also have a groomer attached if you want to get her cleaned up,” the cashier said, Kiersten, her name tag read.

“That would be amazing, thank you.”

When the dog came out she was fluffy and clean and he could see that her fur was wavy and yellow rather than the tangled brown it had been before.

“Come here Winnie,” burst out of his lips and the dog bounded into his arms.  Dan giggled as she licked his face and internally scoffed at himself, it seemed like he was naming her Winnie the Pooh.  How on brand.

She let out a happy bark and Dan gave in and sat on the floor of the pet shop letting her cover his face in slobber and cover his black clothes with hair.

“She’s adorable,” Kiersten said, smiling as she knelt down next to him.  “Do you think you’ve got everything?”

Dan stood back up, lifting his bags full of food and supplies.  “I think so,” He replied, still smiling at Winnie.  “Thank you for everything,”  his dimple winked and Kiersten blushed a little.

“O-of course!”  

She waved them out of the store as Dan clipped Winnies new black leash to her shiny black collar.  

“I’m gonna take such good care of you,” he said as he bent down on the pavement outside.  Her doggy eyes looked at him with complete trust and Dan almost felt like he could cry.  “You’re going to be the happiest dog in the world.”  Winnie licked his face in response and Dan laughed, his nose scrunching up as he pulled away a bit.  “Phil’s gonna love you.”

And he did, though he did put up a half-hearted argument for the name Susan.  

[lindseyluvsdrag]

It Takes Two Ch.1

Third installment of my Knocked Up series. Parts 1 & 2 here

Warning: Smut, violence, the tears of an advanced 2.5 year old

Ignore any typos :)

“Matthewwww!” Violet shouted from the couch. “Hurry up, it's starting!”

“I'm comin’!” the man replied as he snatched the bag of popcorn from the microwave. It was a little premature but he dumped the contents into a bowl before rushing back into the living room. He jumped over the back of the couch and landed onto his favorite spot next to his wife.

Their two year old daughter had spread her favorite Storm blanket onto the hardwood floor and was sprawled out next to her best friend, Shea. Her Aunt Raven watched the woman through judgemental eyes.

“Why is she even here?” she asked her wife.

“Because the Lents like her. Hell, she used to be one of them.”

Raven cringed. “That's so disgusting, like, shel shouldn't be here. Just because she speaks comic book, doesn't give her the right to call our Goddaughter her ‘best friend’. Do you know how weird that is?”

Naomi exhaled in expression. “She's a really nice lady and Violet wanted her here for the viewing so just get over it.”

“Ssshhhhh!” Violet demanded as she turned up the volume on the TV.

“This week on Bridezillas!” the narrator announced. “Meet Violet.”

Footage of the woman flashed across the screen. “I'm Violet Chachki and I'm a one of a kind collectable. I'm veryyyy visually appealing.”

“A New York fashionista by day and a tyrant by night.”

Violet gasped. “Tyrant?! I was not a tyrant!”

“Matthew! Matthewwww! You’re so full of shit, Matthew! *Bleep* you, Matthew!” They showed  clips of the woman shouting that had be edited together to create a montage of her greatness. “I want chocolate cake! Bloated?! No! Get the fuck away from me! Naomi! Na-o-mi! Naomiiiiiii!”

Matt burst into laughter.

“She'll take you on a rollercoaster ride and leave you with a surprise ending that you'll have to see to believe.”

“We got a runaway bride, y'all!”

They'd edited Raven's voice over the footage of Violet and Naomi sprinting down the busy New York street.

“Coming up on Bridezillassss!”

“This is going to be so good,” Matt said as he stuffed his mouth with popcorn.

“I want some too!” Clark declared.

“Open,” Matt replied.

His daughter obliged. She opened her mouth and allowed her father to toss popcorn kernels into in.

“Yum-my,” she said when he managed to land the first few pieces perfectly.

Violet frowned. “Matthew, I don't want her to choke.”

Matt passed the entire bowl over to his daughter before wrapping his arm around his wife's shoulder and pulling her close so that he could kiss her temple.

Raven rolled her eyes and stormed into the kitchen. The woman popped open the first bottle of wine that she could find, pressed it to her lips and turned it upside down. A voice behind her shortly thereafter made her jump.

“I would ask you to share, but I'm trying to get pregnant and drinking is against doctor's orders,” Shea joked.

Raven scowled. “As if I'd share anything with you.”

The woman defensively raised her hands while she grabbed the popcorn that Clark had asked her to make. She placed the packet into the microwave and pressed the corresponding button.

“Why are you here?” the woman pressed. “Dealing with Matthew is bad enough, but to bring his baggage into my best friend's house is just too much for me.”

“I'm here because Violet invited me. We've actually gotten really close since the wedding, especially since she gifted me with her Paris tickets.”

“You've known her for like five minutes.”

“I mean, that's all it takes to get to know someone. That and a little shopping at Neiman's.”

“Yo-You’ve gone shopping together?”

“Oh, plenty of times,” Shea said truthfully. “We even looked at potential furniture for the nursery.”

“Maybe she just feels bad that you can't have a baby,” Raven hissed.

Out of respect for the Lent’s home, the woman remained calm. “Is that so? Maybe she feels bad that neither can your wife.” Shea didn't even wait for the microwave to beep before she popped the hatch, grabbed the bag and casually exited the room.

Raven saw nothing but red as she flung the wine bottle at the other woman. It landed against her head in a loud thump.

Everything after that was a blur. The woman's tunnelled vision was paired with echoing yells and Clark's cries. When Raven finally snapped out of the trance, she realized that she'd made it home. Naomi was seated in the corner across the room, knocking the ashes off of the cigarette that she puffed on.

“Have you come to your fucking senses yet?”

“What happened?” Raven asked.

“You nearly killed Shea!”

“No, babe, she said some really fucked up shit!”

“Like what? Tell me what is horrible enough to get a bottle thrown at your head! And don't lie because I know your ass started it.”

“As a matter of fact, I was defending your ass! She was saying how she shops with Vi and how they're the best of friends and I was brutally honest with her. I told her that Vi probably just feels bad that she can't have kids and she was all like well neither can your wife. How was I supposed to respond to that?!”

“Seriously, Raven? If you're going to be with me, you have to develop a tougher skin than that. I heard crap like that, and way worse, growing up. You can't attack everyone who talks shit. You can't attack the world.”

“If the world tries to hurt you, I will.”

Naomi sighed as she extinguished the cancer stick. “I appreciate the gesture, but that's not how the world works.” The woman pushed herself out of her seat. “Get your coat.”

Raven frowned. “Where are we going?”

“To get some flowers, then to the hospital.”

---

“I walk out of the kitchen and the next thing I know is that I'm seeing stars,” Shea joked. “Like goddamn, is this what I get for undercooking the popcorn?”

Matt and Violet laughed.

“Only you could make a situation like this funny,” the man said.

Clark climbed from the foot of the bed to Shea's side. “Are you sureee you're okay?”

“Besides being a little dizzy, yes, I'm fine.”

“But what about this?” the girl asked as she gently touched the gauze bandage around the woman's head.

“It only hurts a little but I'll be fine, Clark. How are you feeling?”

“Still scared,” she sniffled. “I never saw a lot of blood on the floor before.”

Matt frowned and pulled his daughter into an embrace. “It's okay, boo,” he cooed as he rocked her.

There was a knock on the door before the doctor entered the room.

“So, I have some blood work results. I'm not sure if you want it shared privately or…”

“No, it's fine. What's up?”

“Okay, so, your blood work shows that you have very low iron levels. You're pretty much anemic.”

Shea frowned. “Um, okay, so what does that mean?”

“It means that you've been trying to conceive a baby, but research has shown that women who don’t get enough iron can develop anovulation. That is the lack of ovulating during the menstrual cycle. Low iron levels may also affect the health of the egg to be fertilized. It can diminish your ability to get pregnant by as much as sixty percent.”

“Sixty?! Holy sparkles,” she said, her new cuss word replacement whilst around Clark. “So what do I have to do to fix it?”

“I'm prescribing you some iron pills and recommending food rich in iron and other minerals to help you and the baby out.”

Her eyes grew wide. “B-Baby?”

“Oh, yes. Your blood work also shows that you're currently pregnant.”

“Oh my God!”

“Are we seriously going to be those friends that are knocked up at the same time?!” Violet laughed before hugging the woman. “Congratulations!”

It was a bittersweet moment for Matt. He squeezed his ex's hand. “Congrats.”

The gears in Clark's head were obviously turning. “So there's a baby in Miss Shea's stomach too?”

“Allegedly,” Shea replied.

The girl wrinkled her nose. “How does the baby get in the stomach?”

“Anddddd that's my cue,” Matt said as he turned on his heel and exited the room with the girl in his arms. “Want a soft pretzel?”

“Yes!”

The women burst into laughter.

“The universe works in the craziest ways because we literally just looked at furniture for nurseries,” Violet said. “Now you get to pick out your own.”

“I wouldn't be so quick about this. I've been pregnant before and it usually ends horribly.”

“This one won't,” Violet assured. “We'll keep you on those pills and make sure you eat nickels or some shit.”

“Aww, I love nickels!”

The women cackled just as Naomi hesitantly  entered the room. She cleared her throat before she spoke. “I can't express how sorry I am that this happened to you. Because I'm married to Raven, I automatically bare some of the responsibilities for her mistakes. And from the bottom of my heart, I'm truly sorry,” she sniffled.

“You're married to a goddamn neanderthal, sweetheart,” Shea replied. “And I swear that whenever I see her again, I'm going to kill her. I hope that you have life insurance on her, I hope that you have a burial plot for her and I hope that you have a little black dress ready to wear because I'm literally going to stomp her into the ground- as a matter of fact, you won't even need a funeral home to do the job for you. I’m going to bury that bitch,” she fumed.

“No, no,” Violet intervened. “You won't be doing anything like that.”

“Violet, I understand that she's one of your best friends but she threw a full fucking bottle of wine at my head! I have twenty stitches because of her!”

“I know and it's not even about her being my friend, Shea. You're pregnant.”

Naomi nauseously clutched her abdomen. “You're pregnant?” she wheezed out.

“She is,” Violet responded.

“Oh, God,” Naomi panted.

Her friend pushed herself out of her seat. “Are you okay?”

“No! How am I supposed to feel knowing that Raven has attacked this poor pregnant woman 'in my honor’?!”

“To be fair, I didn't know that I was pregnant until a few minutes ago.”

“It’s not fair,” Naomi sniffled. “She shouldn't be attacking people to begin with and I just feel terrible.”

“Where is she?” Violet asked.

“I told her to wait in the lobby. I wasn't sure if you wanted to see her.”

“Not really,” Shea admitted.

“Me either,” Violet said. “For one, she disrespected my home. Two, she traumatized my fucking daughter, which is damn near unforgivable. Three, she ruined my Bridezilla viewing party and my hardwood floors. Four, she left like an idiot without a goddamn apology.”

“Would you guys be willing to accept an apology from her now?”

Shea casually checked her nails while Violet mindlessly twirled a strand of her hair. “No,” they said collectively before laughing.

Naomi was heartbroken. “That's fair. Um, I guess I'll get going. I hope you feel better soon, Shea. Vi... I'll call you later.”

“Alright, sweetie.” Violet kissed her friend on the cheek before turning back to Shea. “We have to figure out how far along you are! Come to my gyno’s office.”

“I'm down.”

“Do you think our morning sickness will be synced up?”

Shea laughed. “Let’s hope not. But seeing you throw up would totally make me throw up, though.”

“Well, we can't both vomit at the same time. Who will hold back our hair?”

The question was trivial but it hit Naomi in a way that reminded her that she'd never experience  pregnancy or be able to have sweet moments like this with her best friend. With tears in her eyes, she slipped out of the room and made her way towards the lobby where Raven greeted her.

“What happened?”

“Shea is pregnant.”

The woman gulped. “I didn't... I didn't hurt the baby, did I?”

“No. I mean, as far as I know. But God, Raven. Why do you have to be so fucking psychotic?!” Naomi stormed pass her wife and out of the hospital doors but Raven was quick on her heels.

“I'm not psychotic!”

“You burn things and you attack people, what else would you call that?!”

“Protective!”

“Oh, yeah,” she scoffed. “Protect me from my best friend who now hates you and wants hardly anything to do with me because of it.”

Raven paused. “Vi hates me?”

“She's livid for the following reasons: you disrespected her home. You traumatized CC, which will never forgive you for. You ruined her Bridezilla viewing party and her hardwood floors. You left without apologizing.”

“I’m sorry, I blacked out! I could apologize now and-”

“It's too late to apologize, Raven! You can't react in situations now and think later! That's how people in up incarcerated for murder!”

The woman pondered for a second. “Surprisingly, I've never been to jail.”

Naomi threw her arms up in exasperation and proceeded to storm to the car. Raven sighed and followed suit, climbing into the driver's seat before speeding out of the parking lot. The wives rode home in silence. When they made it inside the condo, Naomi made it a point to slam every door, window and cabinet that she came in contact with.

The tantrum quickly waned on Raven's nerves.

“Alright, can you tell me exactly how long you plan on being mad? The slamming is giving me a headache.”

“You know who else has a headache?! Shea does!”

“Fuck Shea! I don't give a fuck about Shea!”

“So you have no remorse for what you did to her?”

“I have no remorse for defending my wife, no.”

Naomi burst into tears. “I can't be the reason that you hurt by people!” She stormed into the bedroom and tossed herself onto the king sized mattress.

“Babeee,” Raven groaned as she followed her. She climbed onto the bed next to her wife and stroked the woman's hair. “Please don't cry. Please.”

“Leave me alone,” Naomi sobbed.

“Never,” Raven promised as she kissed her wife's shoulder then neck, then jaw. She returned to her neck and began to suck on it.

“Stopppp,” her wife weakly protested.

The woman continued and eventually got Naomi to roll over so that she could kiss her tears away. “Baby, please don't be mad at me.”

She didn't respond but Raven refused to give up, kissing along her wife’s neck and chest before traveling down her body. When she slid down her skirt and thong, Naomi finally relented to the woman's touch.

Raven wasted no time in doing everything she could to orally please her lover, practically worshipping her clit with her mouth while her fingers explored her sugar walls.

Naomi had given in, but she didn't want the woman to think that what she had done was acceptable. She formed her mouth to say something but when Raven flipped her onto her stomach as she pulled the dildo from the nightstand drawer, she decided that it'd be best to wait.

“You have the most perfect ass,” Raven whispered, kissing her wife's right cheek prior to giving it a firm slap. Naomi whimpered in pleasure so Raven did it again, then again. When she felt like the flushed skin had had enough, the woman gave her lover's smooth ass tender kisses to make up for it. “So which hole will I be pounding tonight?”

“It doesn't matter, just fuck me,” Naomi pleaded.

“Then your perfect ass it is.” Raven quickly strapped on the eight inch dildo they'd named Big Ben prior to retrieving the tingle inducing lube from the nightstand. She smeared the gel all over her wife's apple shaped bottom and the realistic strap-on before spreading her wife's cheeks and sliding in the tip.

Naomi gasped as she clutched the sheets while Raven continued to inch the silicone member into her. When the full length was nestled inside of the woman's ass, Raven gave her wife a moment to adjust before sliding out and gently entering again.

“Fuck,” Naomi moaned.

“You like that, baby?” she asked as she picked up her thrusting pace.

“Yes! Oh God, yes.”

Raven pulled the woman closer by her hips and continued to pound into her wife until she was panting and begging her not to stop as she climaxed.

“You're so fucking beautiful. I love making you cum all over this cock.”

Naomi wasn't in the mood for dirty talk as she collected herself enough to dismount the penis.

“Wanna ride it now?” Raven asked.

“No,” she sighed as she grabbed her skirt and tossed it into the hamper. The woman made her way to the bathroom door way before pausing and turning around. “Do you seriously not have any remorse for what you did to Shea?”

Raven unclipped the strap-on. “Nope,” she chirped.

“And if it costs me my friendship with Violet, would you feel remorse then?”

“What I did has nothing to do with her.”

“Yes it does! You attacked someone in her house! You disrespected my best friend!”

“She didn't want my apology so fuck her!”

“Don’t talk about her like that!”

“You seriously want to argue with me about Violet? Violet isn't your wife! Violet doesn't fuck you the way that I fuck you! Violet doesn't love you the way that I love you!”

“I'd rather be celibate and have her in my life than be married to someone who doesn't care enough to respect my friend of 25 years.”

“Are you seriously choosing Violet over me?”

Naomi took a deep breath. “Yeah...I guess I am.”

Raven laughed in disbelief. “Do you realize that I'm the woman that saved your fucking life? I pushed you out of the way of a car driven by a transphobic lunatic that was trying to kill you! I lost my memory, hell, I almost lost my fucking life for you!”

“Sometimes I regret that your memory did come back,” was all Naomi could say.

The expression on Raven's face made the woman's stomach twist into knots. “What do you mean?”

“I never wanted to marry a female,” she blurted. “But gender is boundless and you made me realize that was love too, but fuck, Raven. Maybe if you hadn't gotten your memory back…maybe if we hadn't have gotten married, you wouldn't be this way. You're... insane.”

The word seemed to trigger the woman but instead of exploding, an eerily calm demeanor took its place. “Insane?”

“Yes! At first I thought your temper was a little sexy, but now you've gone too far- and with no remorse! I can't take it anymore.”

“So... you're leaving me?”

Naomi sighed. “I'm spending the night at a hotel so that I can clear my head but honestly... I don't think this is fixable.”

“Okay,” Raven said nonchalantly.

“Alright,” the woman replied as she turned on her heel and entered the walk-in closet.

After getting dressed, she grabbed her suitcase and began stuffing her designer clothing into it. When she was finished packing, Naomi wheeled her luggage into the bedroom. She didn't see Raven, but her heart stopped when she saw the trail of blood leading out of the room. “Raven!” She dropped her suitcase and dashed into the living room, then all over the rest of the house, but the woman was nowhere to be found. “Raven!”

---

Violet sat up in bed, flipping through the latest issue of Vogue Italia while Matt walked his fingers along her belly as he read through his expectant father's book.

“Tomorrow can't come fast enough,” he sighed. “Shea is going to this appointment with us?”

“Technically, yes. She has her own apartment to see how far along she is and whatnot.”

"And we're what? Twelve weeks along?”

The woman nodded.

“Twelve weeks...twelve weeks,” the man mumbled as he flipped through the pages of his book. He stopped on the corresponding section. “‘At twelve weeks, your baby's face looks unquestionably human’.” Matt cackled. “His eyes have moved from the sides of his head to the front of his head-”

“Why do they always gender the damn fetus in these books?” Violet asked. “Protest.”

Matt laughed and continued to read. “‘And his ears are right where they should be. From crown to rump, your baby-to-be is just over 2 inches long and weighs half an ounce. Your baby is about the size of a lime’.”

“Matthew, stop. That's making me nauseous.”

The man closed the book. “So, do you want a girl or a boy this time?”

“Doesn't matter. So long as they're healthy.”

“You say that like Clark isn't healthy.”

Just then, a message poured into their walkie talkie.

“Daddy, come quick! Magento is under my bed and wants to steal all of my friends!”

“I rest my case,” Violet said.

Matt gave the woman a playful nudge on the arm before making his way towards the exit.

“Ugh, how dare they put this crap in Vogue,” Violet groaned as she grabbed her cell phone. She dialed her best friend.

“Hello?” Naomi sniffled.

“Girl, why is there capri gauchos in this issue of Vogue Italia? It's disgusting and disrespectful…but it's nothing to cry over. What's wrong?”

---

“I’m going to ask you again,” one lieutenant hissed at Naomi. The frazzled woman nervously sat across from him and his partner, trying to suppress more tears as they relentlessly interrogated her. “Do you know where your wife could've gone?”

“No! For the fifth time, no! My wife is missing and you act like I had something to do with it!”

“Well did you?” the other officer asked. “Here, I'll give you a scenario: you two were in the middle of a fight. She said that she was leaving you. In a blind rage, you attack her. 'If I can't have you, no one can!’ You snap out of it and see what you'd done and you hide the body.”

"That explains the luggage and why she left her cell phone and purse,” the first lieutenant added.

“No, that is my luggage! I was packing and when I left the room, she was gone and so was her car!   And when I saw the blood, I called you guys! I'd never hurt my wife!”

“I'm going to hurt you!” Naomi heard Violet shout. “Where is Naomi?! You'd better tell me where she is now or I'll slaughter your entire division in my magazine!”

The lieutenants looked at each other. “Who is that?”

“My best friend. The one that called.”

“Ma'am, put the high heel down! I will taze you!”

“She's pregnant!” Naomi informed as she pushed herself out of her seat, then out of the room. “Don’t taze her!” she pleaded. “Violet, calm down.”

The woman returned the five inch makeshift weapon to her foot. “Are you okay, honey? Did they hurt you?”

“No, I'm fine but the questioning-”

“Questioning for what?! You didn't do anything!” She turned to the nearest detective. “She didn't do anything and you won't be saying another thing to her without her lawyer present!”

“The reason that I didn't lawyer up was because I had nothing to hide,” Naomi admitted. “I just need to know what happened to Raven,” she sniffled.

“Well, did you call her parents?”

Naomi was perplexed. “Parents? She told me that her parents were dead.”

“What? No, they're alive. They live in Rochester.”

---

“I came in here to fight Magento. How did I end up with fingernail polish on?” Matt asked his daughter as she splattered globs of coral nail polish on his fingers.

“Because it's your color,” Clark replied.

“Fair enough,” he sighed.

“Daddy, you're so prettyyyy!”

“Thank you, pudding. You want me to paint yours now?”

“Yes!” Clark rushed into her closet and returned shortly after with an ice blue shade of polish. She handed it to her father.

“Ooo, this is cute.”

“It's my color,” the girl chirped as she flopped to the floor in front of him and placed her small hand in his.

“Really? I've always liked red on you.”

“I like red too! Can we do both?”

“And make purple?”

Clark wrinkled her nose in confusion. “Purple?”

“Yes. When you mix red and blue together, it makes purple.”

“Oh...no. I just want blue today. Like Iceman.”

Matt smiled as he opened the small bottle. He began to carefully paint each of the girl's tiny fingernails.  

When he finished one hand, Clark did a quality check. “You're a good painter, Daddy.”

“Thank you, boo. Can I have a kiss for all my hard work?”

“Finish the other hand first.”

He laughed. “Okay, princess.”

---

By the time Raven arrived at her parent's house, it was two in the morning. She pulled up the winding driveway, rushed up to the front door and began to pound on it. Moments later, her arthritic father opened the door with a baseball bat in hand. “Raven?! Baby, are you okay?! What are you doing here so late?!”

She pushed past the man and entered the house.

“Dad, you're 55 with rheumatoid arthritis. What the fuck were you going to do with a bat?”

Raven stomped along the beautiful homes marble flooring just as her mother descended the stairs. “We thought you were a burglar!”

“You should be so lucky,” she grumbled.

When the woman noticed her daughter's hostile demeanor, disheveled appearance and  bandaged wrist, she knew that the horror had begun all over again. She swiftly rushed over to her. “So honey, how are you? It feels like we haven't heard from you in months.”

“That's because you haven't,” she replied.

“Well, we love you and we'd love to have you around more often t-”

“Yeah, that's what you said before you tried to send me to prison.”

“Honey, that wasn't prison. It was a hospital. You were sick.”

“Bullshit,” Raven groaned. “Did you cook?” she asked as she made her way towards the refrigerator.

Her mother followed her. “Well, if you aren't sick, what happened to your wrist?”

“I cut it while shaving,” she attempted to joke as she opened the refrigerator doors. Her mother rolled her eyes. Raven grabbed a turkey leg and a handful of shredded cheese.

“Raven...is that a wedding ring?”

“Huh? Oh, yeah. I got married,” she said nonchalantly.

“When?!” her mother demanded.

“Three...four months ago? Yeah, four months ago.” Raven took a bite of the turkey and topped it off with the cheese.

“Honey, why didn't you invite us to your wedding? Tell me about him. Do you love him?”

Raven scowled. “I married a woman.”

“Oh... I forgot that's legal now.”

“This is why I didn't tell you! You're fucking ignorant!”

“Oh, stop it, Raven! You know we're not bigots. I just thought you would've married someone like Nigel.”

“Don't... mention... Nigel,” Raven snarled. “I haven't seen him since the summer before college...since he filed the restraining order.”

Her mother sighed. “I'm just taking it all in. I'd love to meet your wife, darling.”

“She left me.”

The woman wasn't surprised. “Oh... I'm so sorry, baby. Do you think you'll be able to work it out?”

“Not if she keeps picking Violet over me,” Raven hissed.

“Violet Chachki? That girl you went to college with?”

“Yes, mother!” she exploded. “In fact, I met all of my friends in college because everyone from high school hated me! I tried to get away from them and from you! But the one time you pop up on me you blurted all of your information to Violet like an idiot! Nobody cares! You just wanted to be nosy, mother!”

“It was your first year of college and you didn't want to include me in anything!”

“Because I was so excited to get away from you! Do you not understand that growing up here was torture?!”

By this point, her mother was sobbing. “Raven, we provided you with everything you could've ever wanted.”

“Yeah, yeah and you act like that included the psych ward. I didn't want to go to therapy or take meds mother. There's nothing wrong with me. I just love hard and I get emotional.”

“Stalking Nigel and pummeling that the poor girl that he was dating was loving hard?”

Raven angrily swiped the glass vase off of the counter, forcing it to shatter against the tile floor. “I told you not to mention him!”

Out of sheer fear of what the woman was capable of, her mother turned on her heel and quickly retreated up the stairs to her bedroom, locking the door behind her.

“I don't know why you even bother with her,” the woman's husband sighed as he adjusted his pillow. “Borderline personality disorder isn't curable.”

“I don't care if it's incurable. She's my daughter.”

Raven sank to the floor, sobbing as she rocked. “Why can't I think cleary?” She gathered up enough strength to crawl into the living room towards the bookshelf. The woman wiped her eyes, grabbed her high school yearbook and quickly began to flip through it. When she found the senior section, she quickly spotted the brown eyed boy who bore a striking resemblance to her spouse in body type and complexion. Tear drop after tear drop splashed on the glossy pages of the book as the memories of what happened years ago began to haunt the woman all over again.

---

The girl eagerly checked her braces in the compact mirror before slamming it closed when she saw the boy. She quickly stood, smoothed her pigtails and rushed over to him.

“Hi, Nigel!”

“Whoaaa, um, hey...Raj-”

“Raven,” she chirped. “How are you?”

“I'm good.”

“That's good! I mean, I'm glad that you're good because that makes me happy and-”

“Hey, Nigel!” one of the boy's football teammates yelled from across campus. “Let's go, we'll be late for practice!”

“I'm coming!” he shouted back. “Listen, um, Ruby-”

“Raven,” the girl corrected for the second time.

“Raven. I'll see you later.”

“Okay!” she said excitedly. “I'll see you later.”

The boy turned made his way towards his friends.

“See you later,” Raven repeated to herself as she smoothed her hair. “I'll see...you,” she emphasized, “later.” The girl winked. “It's a date.”

After football practice, Raven waited for the boy to exit the locker room and when he did, she skipped over to him and his friends.

“Hi, Nigel!”

The boy gave a casual head nod but continued to walk. She followed.

“So, I was wonderinggggg, since, ya know... homecoming is coming up. If you'd like to go?”

The boy's friends let out low, teasing grumbles.

“I’m pretty sure I'm homecoming king. Of course I'm going.”

“Really?! That's so amazing! I mean, I voted for you three times even though you're only supposed to vote once.”

“Thanks,” he said flatly.

"I can't wait to see you there.”

“Yeah, ok.”

“Why don't you ask her to be your date?” one of his friends pressed while the others suppressed their laughter.

Raven took in an excited breath.

Nigel punched the jokester on the arm. “I’m already going with Tatianna.”

The girl's face fell. “It’s okay,” she assured. “Just seeing you there will be awesome.”

Before Nigel could utter an uncomfortable 'ditto’, Raven's mother honked as she pulled up behind her.

“Oh! Time to go dress shopping. I'll see you guys later!” Raven skipped towards the car before abruptly stopping and turning around. “Nigel, what color vest are you wearing? If you don't mind me asking.”

“I don't know yet,” he lied. “I have to go shopping too and-”

“He's wearing blue!” one of the other boys shouted.

“Oh my God, I love blue! Okay, see you guys later!” Raven rushed the rest of the distance to her mother's car and hopped inside. “Hey, Mom.”

“Hi, sweetheart. Is that the one that asked you to homecoming?”

“Yes,” she said, practically melting as she waved goodbye to the boy.

“Hello, Nigel!” her mother politely greeted with a wave before speeding off.

“God, even her Mom knows my name?” the boy groaned.

“Well, duh, you're her future son-in-law,” his friends teased.

“Fuck all the way off.”

---

Raven felt adorable in her knee length blue, taffeta dress. She added a bejeweled belt and a diamond clip in her barrel curled hair for flare. The girl strutted into the cafeteria and she wasn't surprised to see Nigel and Tatianna on the dance floor but it didn't hurt nonetheless. She got herself a glass of punch before picking a spot against the wall so that she could watch the boy and the girl as they slow danced.

Nigel's drunken hands explored Tatianna’s body while his lips aggressively took her neck.

“Babe...babe, stop,” she protested.

“Come on, girl,” he slurred. “You look good enough to eat.”

“I know this, but that doesn't give you the right to be sloppy.”

The boy scoffed. “Just get over here.” He snatched her closer to him by the waist.

Tatianna shoved him away before slapping the boy across the face. “I demand respect! If you won't give it to me, I'm out of here!” The girl stormed towards the exit, quickly followed by her date who was quickly followed by Raven.

Tatianna hopped into her car.

“Tati, come on!” Nigel pleaded. “You're being dramatic!”

“Fuck you!” the girl said as she sped off.

“Bitch,” he groaned, pulling the flask from his pocket to take another sip of vodka.

“Nigel, are you okay?” Raven asked.

The boy looked at her and nodded.

She sighed in relief. “Good. Nobody deserves to be slapped... especially someone as beautiful as you.”

“Oh, yeah?” He took another sip and returned the flask to his jacket pocket. “You're sorta beautiful too.”

The girl's entire face became a heated furnace.  “Re-Really?”

“Yeah.”

“Y-You want to go inside and dance? They're playing a slow song.”

“Nahhh,” he slurred. “I got a better idea.” Nigel grabbed Raven's hand and she could've fainted then and there.

It was her dreams finally becoming reality as he led her to his car.

“Where are we going?” she asked.

“Nowhere,” he assured as he opened the back door and ushered her in while he followed and closed the door. Raven smoothed her dress but it was wrinkled once again when the boy leaned in for a kiss. The girl was so excited that she threw her hands up, only to have them hit the roof of the car.

“Sorry, Nigel,” she grumbled.

“It's okay,” the boy told her while he pulled away to dig into his glove compartment.

When Raven saw the condom, her eyes grew wide. She loudly cleared her throat.

“Is there a problem?”

“No! I mean, um, no,” she said more calmly. “I just want to get to know you and um, well I already know a lot about you like your schedule and your favorite thing to eat at lunch and I really don't want to sound weird, you know, I used to work in the cafeteria and I volunteered in the front office so I just happened to notice these things but I really, really, really like you and-”

He cut her off with another kiss. “I like your braces.”

The melted girl thanked him and she was like putty in his hands as he leaned her onto the seat before reaching underneath her skirt. When his hand found her panties Raven became tense.

“There's probably something that I should tell you.”

“What?”

“I'm a virgin.”

He smiled. “Nothing wrong with that.” The boy reached into his pocket, grabbed the flask and handed it to her. “Sip and you'll be fine.”

Raven sat up and gulped the liquid before groaning at her first taste of alcohol. “That's so grossss.”

“Yeah...but it'll help you relaxxx.”

The girl hung onto every word that left the boy's lips. She nodded and drank some more. “Wooo! Hello, relaxation.”

Nigel smiled and proceeded to remove the girl's panties. He tossed them over his shoulder, making Raven laugh while he removed his pants and slid on the condom onto his dick. The entire scenario was just how Raven had imagined it. Besides her first time being on their wedding night, she knew that staring into his brown eyes right before they made love would be just like this.

He positioned himself over the girl and he slowly pushed himself inside of her. She winced at the pain, but she knew that the boy would be gentle and take care of her. Raven was more excited for the intimacy than the sex itself, watching the boy's every expression and attempting to match her exhales with his.

“You look beautiful,” she offered.

“I'm about to come,” was his response.

The girl's eyes grew wide in excitement. “That means I did good?”

“Fuck,” the boy moaned as he climaxed into the condom.

Raven smiled. We're such a perfect couple, she thought.

Nigel pulled out and groaned. “Fuck, you're bleeding.”

“Well, it doesn't hurt anymore,” the girl assured.

“My poor fucking seats. This needs to be cleaned, asap. Umm, I'll take you home.”

“Oh…okay.”

When the boy pulled in front of her house, Raven climbed out and made her way to the driver side window. “I had fun tonight. Although, I really wished we could've danced.”

Nigel chuckled. “Homecoming is overrated.” He grabbed the plastic crown that he'd won as homecoming king and placed it on the girl's head. “Goodnight.”

With a swelling heart, Raven stole a kiss. “Goodnight.”

The boy sped off, leaving the girl to twirl several times before skipping into the house.

“You're home early,” her mother said.

“Yeah, but it doesn't matter because Nigel loves meeee,” she squealed before rushing up the stairs to her laptop so that she could change her Facebook relationship status from ‘Single’ to 'In a Relationship’.

Monday morning Raven couldn't wait to see the boy that she'd dreamt about the entire weekend. Her heart exploded when she saw him, but before she could make her way over, Tatianna approached and kissed him.

The girl had no idea what to think, but she quickly made her way over to make her territory known.

“Hey, Nigel... what's going on?”

“What do you mean what's going on?” he asked.

Raven glanced between the boy and the smug Tatianna. “You're with me! You told me that I was beautiful! You made love to me on homecoming night! Y-You gave me your crown and kissed me goodnight!”

The boy clenched his jaw before exhaling. “I'm sorry.”

“You... You're sorry?” she asked in a broken voice. “You took my virginity.”

Tatianna groaned. “Okay, I'm ready to go. This is getting pathetic.”

“Nobody is talking to you, wench! At least I don't hit him!”

“I demand his respect and nothing less and as you can see, he comes back to me every time! Babe, tell her!”

Nigel sighed. “I'm with Tatianna. I love her. What we did on Saturday night was a drunken mistake.”

Tatianna rolled her neck as she reached into her purse and pulled out the Ziploc bag that carried Raven's panties. She tossed it at her. “And get your nasty underwear that you left in my man's car!”

The crowd that had now gathered let out a collective 'Oooooo’.

It was the last thing that Raven heard before her red tinted vision overwhelmed her. She lunged at Tatianna and began to slam the girl's head against the concrete.

Nigel was quick to pull Raven off of his girlfriend but the sidewalk was already stained with her blood.

“Oh, dear,” Raven exhaled as she dusted herself off. “What happened?”

---

“What happened, Raven?” her therapist asked.

“I don't know! All I remember is Tatianna throwing my underwear at me, after that Nigel was pulling me off of her and into his arms.”

“Are you sure that he was pulling you into his arms?”

“Uh, yeah,” Raven said as if was obvious. “Nigel loves me.”

“He told you that?”

“He didn't have to tell me. The way he looked into my eyes as we made love spoke volumes.”

“Raven... that boy was drunk. That's not love.”

The girl scowled. “You don't know what love is!” she exploded, pushing herself out of her seat then out of therapy completely.

---

After school was over for the day, Nigel made his way down his usual path to his car.

Raven jumped out of the shrubbery to greet him.“Hi, baby!”

“What the fuck!” the startled boy let out. “What the hell are you doing on campus, Raven?! You're expelled!”

She shushed him as she placed a finger to his lips. “Tatianna doesn't have her evil clutches to dig into you anymore. We can finally be together,” the girl panted breathlessly.

Nigel shoved her away. “Tatianna is in the hospital because of you! She's in so much pain and I hate to see her like that. This is your last chance to get the to fuck out of her before I call campus security.”

I love you, get out here before we're discovered, was what the girl heard. “Come with me, Nigel,” she exhaled.

“What?” the clearly confused boy asked.

Raven threw her arms around him. “Run away with me, darling.”

Nigel shoved the girl away yet again. “I'm not your darling! Get away from me!” He sprinted to his car but Raven was hot on his heels.

“With Tatianna out of the way, we can work this out! I love you and I know you love me! We can run away and be together forever!”

The boy climbed into his car and locked the doors. As he fumbled with the key, Raven smashed her face against the driver side window.  

“Until we meet again, my love!”

Nigel threw the car into gear, narrowly missing the girl as he smashed the gas.

Raven exhaled. “What a man.”

“Hey, you!” campus security shouted as he made his way towards her. The girl quickly took off.

---

“Raven, did you go to your old school today?” her mother asked over dinner.

“No,” she lied. “Why?”

“I got a call from the dean. He says the girl on the security camera hiding in the bushes before running after Nigel Carraway looks eerily similar to you.”

“Well it wasn't me,” she said defensively.

Despite knowing that she was lying, her mother just went with it. “Good. There's nothing there for you anymore. Private school is so much better, right?”

“No,” Raven grumbled. “It's all girls and they don't like me.”

“Honey, you'll make friends soon enough. You just have to open up and show them your amazing personality.”

“It’d be better if Nigel was there.”

The woman stabbed her asparagus out of sheer frustration. “Raven, I know that you were... intimate with this boy. And as humans, sometimes that makes us feel very attached to one another. But it's okay to move on if someone isn't interested in you.”

“Mom, I told you. We made love because we love each other and we're going to be together. We're thinking about eloping.”

Her mother nearly choked. “Elope?” She knew that the boy had no interest in the girl, but she was always careful to tiptoe around Raven's delusions. “Honey, you can't elope. You're just 17. You're still a baby.”

“I'm not a baby! Do babies have sex?!”

The woman sighed. “I guess not. Just promise me that you'll focus on your schooling and taking your meds.”

“I don't like those meds,” she protested. “I can't think clearly on them.”

“I spoke to Nigel's mother the other day…”

Raven’s eyes grew wide. “You spoke to Pam?! What'd she say?”

The woman put on a cheeky expression.

“Come on, Mommmm,” the girl pleaded. “Tell me!”

“She wants a daughter-in-law who is calm, cool and collected.”

“That's me!”

“That's what I told her...but you are a little high strung off of your medicine.”

“High strung? That's no good.”

“Not at all. Pam wouldn't like it at all and there's one thing you must do in a marriage. Impress your mother-in-law.”

Raven shrieked. “I'll go take my meds now!” She pushed herself out of her seat and rushed up the stairs. Her mother smiled and took a bite of her asparagus.

Raven entered the bathroom, opened the medicine cabinet and popped open the bottle of medication. She frowned.

“I don't like being foggy. If Pam can't accept me as I am...then fuck her.” The girl dumped the pills into the toilet and flushed them.

---

Nigel grinned when he woke to the smell of bacon on a Saturday morning. The boy stretched as he crawled out of bed and made his way to the kitchen. “Ma, if you wanted me to do my chores, you didn't have to whip out my weakness. I'll..take out the...tras-” His heart practically stopped when he saw Raven in a sheer negligee pressing the bacon into the frying pan.

“Good morning, sweetheart. I made you breakfast.”

“Mom!” he shouted.

“She's gone,” Raven informed. “She left about 15 minutes ago... we're alone, baby,” she said lustfully.

“Raven...get the fuck out of my house or I'll call the cops!”

The girl laughed. “Babe, you're so funny. Come on. Have a seat so you can eat.”

The boy rushed over, gripped the girl's arm and began to drag her towards the exit. “Get out!”

“Sweetheart, you're hurting meeee.”

“Good! Get the fuck out!” Nigel shoved Raven so  hard that she fell to the floor.

When the girl hit the hardwood, in addition to her bones, something inside of her snapped. “Okay, Nigel... I'll go,” she said calmly as she pushed herself off of the floor. “Just let me get my purse.” Raven sauntered over to the counter and instead of grabbing her bag, she grabbed a sharp blade from the knife block and sliced her wrist.

“Fuck!” Nigel rushed over to the girl, snatched the knife from her hand and tossed it before calling 911.

---

Raven stared at the blandly painted wall as she laid on her side in the hospital bed. Her mother sat across from her. The woman had no idea what to say, but she was grateful that the boy had enough sense to call an ambulance instead of kicking her sick daughter out onto the street as she bled.

“Raven...Honey... I-”

“It's okay, Mom. I don't need a pep talk. Nigel doesn't love me and I'm learning to accept that.”

The woman grabbed her daughter's hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

“Come in,” she said when she heard the knock on the door.

A young man neither of them recognized entered the room. “Are you Raven Petruschin?”

“Yes,” the girl replied.

Her mother was suspicious. “Why? Who are you?”

The man didn't respond as he handed Raven the orange envelope. “You've been served.”

“Are you kidding me?!” her mother shouted. “You don't serve people in the hospital!”

He rushed out of the room while Raven opened the envelope and pulled out the paperwork. She read a few lines. “It's a restraining order...from Nigel,” she said quietly.

“Oh, honey that just means-”

“I know what it means mother. It's okay. I understand.”

---

“I understand,” she said as she watched Nigel's house be consumed by the flames she'd set. “I understand.”

The fire was like a cleansing for the girl and she wanted to make sure that Nigel and his mother returned home from his football game to ashes.

She didn't understand why she had to stay away from Nigel. “If he's so bothered, he should stay away from me,” she grumbled.

He did just that when he moved states to attend college and to this day, he hates the smell of bacon and he kicks shrubbery outside of his house before walking to his car.

---

After having her braces removed, Raven strutted into school with a fresh haircut and an even fresher attitude. She enjoyed her last year of high school as one of most popular girls there and by the time she graduated, she knew that fashion was what she wanted to pursue.

---

“Ugh, that professor is totally buggingggg,” Violet groaned as they exited the college classroom. “A minimum of 200 words?! I can'tttt.”

“I don't think it's too bad,” Raven admitted. “I guess I'll start it now to get it out of the way. “What are you about to do?”

“Oh, I'm gonna to meet my friend Naomi for lunch then we're going to Neimans. Wanna come?”

“Sure.”

The duo made their way to the quad fountain and Raven stopped dead in her tracks when she saw the woman. She was a bronze goddess with perfect hair and full lips that Raven could imagine against hers. The woman was the female counterpart to Nigel and Raven was doing a pretty pathetic job at not staring.

“Naomi this is Raven and vice versa,” Violet said.

“H-Hi,” Raven stammered.

“Hey,” Naomi sweetly greeted. “I give hugs,” she said as she wrapped her arms around the other woman. Raven took in a sharp inhale and became intoxicated on the girl's lemongrass scented perfume. “It's nice to meet you,” Naomi added.

“Y-You too. Um, do you know someone by the name of Nigel Caraway?”

Naomi released her. “No, why?”

“Oh... nothing, it's just that you resemble him in your complexion and...fe-features. Did I say something wrong?” she asked when she saw Naomi's expression go from a smile to pursed lips.

“Aside from comparing me to a dude?”

“Oh, no! I didn't mean any harm, I mean, Nigel is an attractive guy but you're... gorgeous.”

She smiled.

“Oh God, don't make her head any bigger than it already is,” Violet said with a chuckle. “Let’s go. Wait- Raven, do you have a pair of Louboutins? We wear Louboutins to Neimans.”

“You’re going to Neimans?” Naomi asked.

“Not me, dearie. We!”

“I can't. I have an appointment.”

“Oh,” she said before blowing a raspberry. “Raven and I can go. Meet us there?”

“Sure.” The duo shared air kisses before Naomi reluctantly did the same to Raven. “I'll go find Nigel for you,” she joked.

Raven found it difficult to laugh. “Thanks.”

It left a cold air between the women, but when Naomi turned to leave, Raven couldn't help but watch.

“Ready?”

“Yeah but um, I don't have any Louboutins.”

Violet gasped dramatically. “But you're a fashion major! That's sacrilegious!”   

Raven shrugged.

“Girl, you've got to take more pride in your wardrobe. Especially if you want to be seen with me.”

“And Naomi?” Raven blurted before quickly pursing her lips as Violet raised an eyebrow.

“Yeah, Naomi too. Why?”

The woman shrugged. “She seems nice.”

“She's perfect,” Violet corrected. “I mean, we wouldn't be friends if weren't.”

“So does that mean that I'm perfect?”

There was a pause. “We're working on it. First off, you need Louboutins!”

---

After making it to the mall, Raven discreetly called her mother while Violet found her second home in the dressing room.

“Mom?”

“Hi, honey! How are you?”

“I need $1,200.”

“Oh, wow is it tuition time again already?”

“No, I need a pair of Louboutins.”

“Raven, I don't have-”

“Mom, please don't start. I just really need this money.”

“Louboutins aren't a necessity, honey.”

“Yeah, not to a dated fashion horror show like you!”

Violet cleared her throat from behind her.

“Oh...um-”

“Give me the phone,” she ordered.

Raven obliged and handed over the device.

“Hello? Mrs.Petruschin? My name is Violet Chachki and you have to understand the importance of looking good in this era. As a fashion major, your daughter is required to have the best of the best and she needs your help getting it.”

“Well, Violet, although I love my daughter, she only calls me when she wants something. Even if I had a spare $1,200 laying around, I wouldn't give it to her for anything besides her education.”

“Well that blows,” Violet said before returning the phone to the other woman. “Ooo, I love that color!” The girl rushed towards the crop tops leaving Raven to groan into her phone.

“Mommmmm. I need thissss.”

“No, Raven. You don't need $1,200 shoes.”

“Then I'll slit my fucking throat because my mother doesn't give a fuck about me or that I'll be the biggest fucking loser on campus without Louboutins!”

The girl tossed her phone to the ground and buried her face into her hands. “Fuck!”

“What is the meltdown for?” Naomi asked as she approached.

Raven quickly composed herself. “I can't afford Louboutins.”

“Well, did you ask your parents?”

“They're dead.” The girl forgot to add 'to me’ at the end of the statement but it was too late as Naomi's face fell.

“Well that's horrible. You'd think that you'd be more upset over your parents than a damn pair of Louboutins- there are bigger struggles in life than not having Louboutins!” Naomi practically shrieked.

Raven was completely taken aback. “Um, okay? Sorry?”

Naomi took a deep breath. “Sorry for blowing up at you. I always get cranky after my appointments.”

“How come?”

“Nothing,” she said quickly. “Have you found anything that you liked?”  

“Besides the $1,200 Louboutins? Nah.”

Naomi made a face. “Well then, keep looking. It's Neimans for fucks sake,” she said before walking off.

Raven couldn't believe how rude the girl was. “Your insides don't match your outsides,” she grumbled to herself before she returned her attention to scanning the racks.

When Violet and Naomi had their arms filled with items compared to the simple earrings that Raven had picked up, the fashion duo frowned.

“We don't wear anything less than two carats,” Violet informed.

“Are you guys a goddamn cult? Why do we all have to match?”

“Because we have a standard to uphold,” she added. “We're the hottest chicks on campus and hundreds of girls want to be our third, so either comply to the rules, or leave us alone.”

“Then I'll leave you alone! You're high maintenance and just plain bitchy,” she said directly to Violet, “and you're rude!” she said as she glowered at Naomi.

Violet laughed. “I could've told you that. Thank you for the submission of your friendship application, but you don't quite meet the requirements for our company.”

Naomi grabbed a random bracelet from the display and placed it into Raven's hand. “Complimentary from the Viomi company. Put it on our tab.”

The duo cackled as they made their way to the checkout.

Raven scowled but when she looked in her hand, she saw the golden crown charm on the bracelet as a clear sign that this was the person she was meant to be with.

“I prayed to the love Gods on this,” the woman mumbled to herself. “The last person that gave you a crown wasn't for you. The next person that gives you a crown is true,” she recited. Raven quickly traded her plain earrings for a pair of two carat stunners before rushing to the checkout.

“I can help you over here,” the checkout girl at register four said.

“No, I'm with them,” Raven said proudly.

“Is that so?” Violet asked. “And what makes you think that we even want you?”

“Because I know fashion. I love fashion probably even more than you because I've lived on both sides of the spectrum: from practically being allergic to brushing my hair to buying these two carat earrings that I can barely afford. I don't just want to fit in, I want to do better for myself because I have a lot of people who don't believe in me. I need to prove them wrong.”

“Is that a good enough answer for you, Naomi?” Violet asked.

“She seems sincere to me,” the woman admitted.

Raven smiled. I knew she'd have my back.

“Fair enough,” Violet said with a shrug. “Hurry up so we can check out. “

The woman skittered towards her new friends to Violet's dismay. “We don't skip. We walk like ladies.”

“Sorry,” Raven said as she suppressed her excitement. She playfully nudged Naomi who winced. “Oh, sorry, did I hurt you?”

She shook her head and changed the subject. “I like your earrings.”

I like your braces, she could still hear Nigel say.

“Th-Thank you.”

The soft smile that Naomi offered in return could've stopped Raven's heart, but the butterflies that fluttered in her stomach were a valid replacement.

She's rough around the edges but we can fix her, Naomi thought.

After checking out, per tradition, the friends went out to eat. Raven eagerly ordered the same dishes as Naomi despite her distaste for avocados. She watched in awe as the woman stuffed a handful of French fries into her mouth. When Naomi caught her staring her cheeks flushed to same color as her ketchup.

“What?” she asked.

“Nothing,” Raven replied. “You just seem to...really love French fries.”

“I do,” she guiltily admitted.

“Naomi has a definite boner for French fries,” Violet joked but she groaned when she realized that it'd hurt the woman's feelings.

Naomi made a face.

“Oh, come on, boo. We say that all the time! You know it's not even like that so don't take it personal.”

The woman fanned her face and attempted to hold back the tears as she composed herself. “I know. Sorry, I'm just really sensitive and hormonal right now,” she sniffled.

Violet wrapped her arms around her friend. “I love you, boo bear.”

“I love you too.”

Raven was envious of the embrace. “Um, so what's going on here?”

“None of your business,” Violet snapped but Naomi shushed her.

“It's okay if she knows. She's been shopping with us therefore we know she's trustworthy.”

“Pfft, she hasn't even been sworn in yet.”

“Okay, okay,” Naomi said as she pulled the latest issue of Vogue out of her purse. “Raven, raise your right hand and place your left hand on the Bible.”

Raven chuckled but when she realized that the woman was serious, she quickly obliged.

“Raven, do you solemnly swear that you will always abide by the rules of fashion including never wearing white after Labor Day and never wearing a sports bra. Do you swear to always dress as chicly as possible and to intervene if one of your fellow fashion wives fail to do so?”

“I do,” she promised.

“Okay, now share a secret about yourself.”

Raven pursed her lips as she thought before speaking. “I lost my virginity in the back of a car.”

“O-M-G, me too,” Violet said in excitement over their common ground.

“Yeah, it was pretty amazing.”

“Okay, now I'll share a secret,” Naomi offered. “I'm trans.”

Raven's eyebrows shot up in disbelief. “No way.”

The woman nodded. “I had an appointment to adjust my E shots today and the hormone boost usually makes me really hungry and kinda cranky so,” she said with a laugh. “Sorry for being a bitch.”

Raven squinted as she examined Naomi's face. “Nigel?”

Naomi frowned. “What?”

Raven shook her head of the delusion. “Nothing. You really look amazing. Um..so-”

“My boobs were a gift from my parents when I turned 18 and my genitals are none of your business but I do indeed sit when I pee.”

“That's totally not what I was going to ask.”

“It's what everyone wants to ask,” she sighed.

Raven shook her head. “I have more respect than that. I think you're a beautiful woman with a voice like angel’s wings.”

Violet rolled her eyes.

“Awww, thanks! Ya know, I think we're going to get along just fine.”

---

Raven slammed the yearbook closed before cradling it against her chest while she sobbed herself to sleep.

---

Violet groaned as she entered her home and pulled off her heels. The woman slowly made her way up the stairs, stopping to peek into her daughter's bedroom.

Clark was snoring in bed with her mask and cape on so the woman softly closed the door and made her way to her bedroom. She burst into laughter when she saw her nude husband sprawled across the bed covered in nothing but rose petals.

“Why are you laughing?!” he demanded, chuckling a little himself over the woman's snorts.

“What the hell are you doing, Matthew?”

“Keeping the spice alive!”

Violet shook her head as she made her way next to him. She eased herself to the bed and kissed her husband. The man gripped her face between his hands and attempted to make out but she groaned and pulled away.

“Babe, I'm not in the moodddd. You won't believe the day I had. Raven is missing, my feet hurt and cops threatened to taze me.”

“Cops threatened to do what?!”

“Ugh, you're missing the biggest point: my feet hurt!”

The man pushed himself out of the bed and retrieved the massage oil. He poured a generous amount into his hands before slathering it onto Violet's feet. As he rubbed them, Matt noticed the red lines that the straps of her heels had left.

“You have to stop wearing those shoes if they're going to hurt your feet.”

“Pfft, don't blame my heels. It's this baby weight. I've already gained eight pounds and it hasn't even been long enough to know the gender of the little womb crook to even curse it out.”

Matt laughed. “Then wear more comfortable shoes.”

“Comfortable shoes means orthopedic shoes, Matthew. That's never going to happen.”

“Well for what it's worth, your tits look amazing.”

“Thank you, honey bun.”

“You're welcome, my little spice cake.” He smiled and kissed her big toe.

“Freak. So what'd you and Super Clark do while I was gone? I mean, besides your lovely manicure.”

“She painted my nails then I painted hers and then we watched Supergirl and Finding Nemo before she turned into Super Clark. She ran around and played with the dogs a bit before she passed out.”

“Sounds about right,” Violet said, stifling a yawn.

“Mhmm,” Matt mumbled as he kissed the top of her foot. “I've been thinking about you since the moment you left, baby. I know it's only been a few hours but I missed you so much.” The man began a trail of kisses starting at her ankles, up to her waist then breasts then neck, stopping at her cheek when he realized that she was asleep. Fuck, he mouthed. Matt rolled out of bed and grabbed the lotion on his way to the bathroom.

---

Violet was excited to wake up to the smell of French toast. After she showered and primped herself, she descended the stairs and entered the kitchen.

“Good morning, Mommy,” Clark greeted as she gnawed on a piece of bacon.

“Good morning, my love.” She kissed her daughter's head before her husband pulled her into a kiss.

Clark covered her eyes.

“Ready for the appointment today?” he asked.

“Sure,” Violet replied as she eyeballed the food. “But I'm more ready for that French toast.”

Matt laughed. “Sit down, I'll make you a plate.”

“Do we get to see Lord Tater Tots today?” Clark asked.

Violet made a face. “Who is Lord Tater Tots?”

“The baby! That's the baby's name.”

“No, no, nooooo it's not,” Violet assured.

Clark frowned. “But that's what the baby told meee.”

“Clark, the baby doesn't speak to you,” she said sternly.

“Yes it is! And the baby wants to be called Lord Tater Tots!”

“Clark Christine Lent, who on Earth do you think you're yelling at?”

The girl folded her arms. “Nobody.”

“If you're going to be a brat today then you can stay home.”

“Noooooo!”

“Clark, go to your room,” her mother ordered.

“Hey, hey, ladies,” Matt intervened. “Chill out and eat your French toast.”

“I am chill like Iceman,” Clark said. “See my nails?”

Matt laughed. “Yes, sweetheart. I see your nails.”

Violet scowled. “Don't reward her for bad behavior, Matthew. I-” she was silenced when the man placed a piece of French toast in her mouth.

“Sshhhhh, grumpy Mommy,” he said. “It'll be okay.”

Clark giggled and her father winked.

“You two need stop ganging up on me,” Violet demanded. “It's not fair and- mmm, okay,” she hummed in satisfaction over the hash brown Matt placed in her mouth.

“When Lord Tater Tots is born, he can be on your team,” Matt joked.

“Ha-ha,” Violet said flatly as she continued to stuff her mouth.

---

Raven's mother was heartbroken yet relieved to see her daughter sleeping in the fetal position on the living room floor. It was better than her being stuffed into a gutter somewhere.

When the phone began to ring, she rushed to it and answered

“Hello, may I speak to Mr. or Mrs. Petruschin?” the man on the other end asked.

“This is Mrs. Petruschin.”

“I'm detective Velour and I was wondering if you've been in contact with your daughter, Raven recently?”

“Oh God, what has she done?”

“Nothing. Her wife has reported her missing.”

“Oh...yes, she's here. She's okay.”

“Okay, um, there was a trail of blood in the bedroom, do you have any idea where that is from? Does she have any injuries?”

“She self harms,” the woman admitted. “When she gets upset, she hurts herself.”

“Oh..so she is safe?”

“For now, yes.”

“Okay. Thank you, Mrs. Petruschin.”

“You're welcome,” the woman sighed as she hung up the phone. She made her way into the living room and gently shook her daughter awake.

“Cocksucker!” Raven blurted. “Huh? Wha-What's going on?”

“The police called. Your wife is looking for you.”

“No she isn't,” the woman grumbled as she turned on her other side. “She wants a divorce.”

“Well, she at least wants to know if you're okay.”

There was a long pause. “I'm not,” Raven quietly sniffled. “I haven't been okay for a really long time.”

---

“Miss Shea!” Clark squealed as they met the woman in the lobby of the OBGYN office.

“Hey, Clark!” she said as she embraced the girl. “How are you?”

“Good! We're here to see your baby and Lord Tater Tots!”

Shea raised an eyebrow. “Lord Tater Tots?”

“Don't ask,” Violet groaned.

“Well, yes we are, Clark. I'm so excitedddd.” She turned to the man seated next to her. “Babe, stand up. I'd like you guys to meet my boyfriend, Danny Noriega.”

The nonchalant man popped his gum. “Sup?”

Violet extended her hand. “Nice to finally meet you.”

“Ditto,” he said flatly as he returned the gesture.

“Are you excited about your babyyy?” Clark asked him.

Danny shrugged. “I guess, yeah.”

Matt scowled. “You want to show a little more respect?” he asked, being sure to assert every ounce of his masculinity.

“What?” the other man replied practically in a slur.

“Danny just got home from his tour. He's just a little tired,” Shea defended.

“Miss Couleé?” the ultrasound technician called.

Shea grabbed her boyfriend's hand. “That's ussss.”

The sizable group followed the woman to the back room.

“So, how is this going to work?” Matt asked. “We see Shea's ultrasound then everyone goes to our ultrasound?”

“Yes,” Violet replied.

“Hop on up here,” the ultrasound technician said as she patted the medical bed. Shea obliged and eagerly lifted her top too expose her washboard abs.

“Bitch,” Violet grumbled.

Shea cackled. “With a baby in there, it won't last long.”

The technician spurted the gel onto Shea's stomach and began to smear it around with the ultrasound wand. She scanned the full circumference of the woman's belly before frowning. “Um... I don't see anything.”

Shea's heart dropped as her eyes instantly began to well up. “Wh-What? What do you mean? I-I-”

“Oh, wait I forgot to turn on the machine! Sorry about that,” she said with a laugh. “The long hours are starting to get to me.”

Matt gripped his wife's hands to stop her from hitting the technician.

“Ahhh, okay. There we are. That little nugget rightttt there is your baby.”

Shea wiped away her tears only to cry some more. “But... that's way more advanced than 4 weeks, right?”

“Yeah, that's around eight weeks.”

“Holy sparkles. I have no idea when or where this baby was conceived then. I don't keep track of my period because it's so irregular as is but- so if I didn't get pregnant in Paris I wonder where.”

“Did you cheat?” Danny asked.

The woman scoffed. “Fuck all the way off.”

“Like you? Nah, I'm good.” He turned and exited the room.

It was Violet's turn to restrain Matt but she failed to get a good grip on the man before he followed Danny out of the hospital.

“Hey, asshole! What's your problem?!”

“Besides being exhausted and not in the mood for this baby shit again? Ohhhh nothing,” he said sarcastically. “We've been through this twice already and by next week, the baby will probably be gone. I can't get emotionally invested into that shit.”

“Be emotionally invested in Shea! I don't care if this is her 80th pregnancy, that woman needs support.”

“I honestly don't think I should be taking ‘how to support Shea advice’ from you.”

Matt clenched his jaw. “Fair enough. Then do it for yourself and especially Shea, dude. She deserves it.”

---

“What do you want to name your baby, Miss Shea?”

“I'm not sure yet. All the good names like Clark are already taken,” she said as she gently poked the girl's nose.

Clark giggled and grabbed the woman's hand as they followed Violet into another room for her appointment. She settled onto the paper covered bed and reluctantly lifted her shirt.

“Introducing a busted can of biscuits.”

“I like biscuits,” Clark squeaked.

“Thanks,” Violet sighed.

When Matt and Danny returned, Matt grabbed his wife's hand while Danny wrapped his arm around the other woman. He kissed her.

“I love you. I have a good feeling about this one,” he said.

“Me too.”

“Okay, okayyyy,” Violet chirped. “All attention needs to be on me now.”

Everyone watched as the technician smoothed the ultrasound goop over the woman's stomach with the wand.

“There's your baby.”

Clark wrinkled her nose in distaste. “That's Lord Tater Tots?”

“Yes,” Matt replied.

“So… I'm the big sister to a... tadpole?”

The man cackled. “No, boo, he has to keep growing so that he can be a cute little guy.”

“Would you please stop gendering the fetus?” Violet asked. “I don't want to relive what happened last time.”

She looked at Clark as the girl dug in her nose.

“Matth-”

“I'm on it.” The man whipped out the sanitizer and told the girl to hold out her hands. As she pulled her finger out of her nose, a booger was already attached to the tip.

“Ooo, Daddy, that's a juicy one!”

Violet instantly went green in the face. “I need a can, I need a can!”

The ultrasound technician quickly offered a chuck bucket while Matt rushed his daughter out of the room.

“Clark,” he said sternly. “What did I tell you about digging in your nose...in front of Mommy?”

“But I always dig in my nose with you! We have boogie contests to see who has the biggest ones!”

“I know, I know and that's all fine, just not in front of Mommy. You know she hates it.”

Clark sighed. “I'm sorryyy.”

“It's okay, boo. Let's go get your hands washed.”

The girl wiped the booger onto the wall and held up her hands. “They look all clean to me.”

“Me too. Let's go see the baby again.”

When they returned to the room, Violet was still attempting to compose herself. “I'm not sure I want to go through with this pregnancy. Kids are disgusting.”

Shea laughed. “So are men but that didn't seem to stop us.”

Naomi breathlessly panted as she rushed into the room. “I made it. How is the ba...by?” she asked, eyes scanning the crowded room and stopping on the new couple that had seemingly taken her position. “Hi,” the woman flatly greeted.

“Naomiiii,” Violet whined. “Save me.”

“I would if I could but it looks like you've got it covered.”

“Auntie!” Clark squealed. “Look at our babyyyyyyy!”

“I can barely see from over here.”

“Oh, Naomi quit being a dork just get in here,” Violet demanded.

The woman stepped further into the room and sighed. “It's like a gas chamber in here.”

Violet rolled her eyes. “Naomi, I don't feel good, okay? If you're going to keep making shady comments then just leave because I don't want to hear it. You should've gotten here on time.”

“Well I'm sorry that I've been on the phone with the police station all morning trying to track down Raven. Thank you for calling to check on me and responding to all of my messages.”

Violet whipped out her phone to check.

“Is that the one?” Naomi heard Danny whisper.

“No, that's the bitches wife,” Shea replied out loud.

Clark covered her ears while Naomi did her best to ignore the woman.

“You didn't send me anything!” Violet shouted before the notifications finally loaded. “You- oh…well, I didn't see that until now and I didn't call you because I was busy.”

“I can tell,” Naomi grumbled.

“But you have no right to come into my appointment with that attitude and kill everyone's vibe.”

“Alright, Violet, if you want me to leave because I'm just ruining this for everyone, I will,” she sniffled as she stormed out.

“Ugh, she's so dramatic.” Violet turned to her husband. “Can we get out of here now? If I don't eat something right now I'll either die or kill someone or both.”

Clark frowned. “But what about Auntie Naomiiii?”

“You can go with her, booger child. Go, go, go.”

“Yayyyy!”

Matt carried his daughter out of the room and quickly caught up with the woman in the parking lot. “Naomi, hey. Clark wants to go with you. If that's okay.”

The woman composed herself as best she could. “Of course, CC. That's always okay.” She extended her arms and pulled the girl into an embrace.

“I'm sorry for Violet,” Matt offered. “I mean, you know how she is better than anyone.”

Naomi nodded. “I do. And I can usually overlook her nonsense but it's been a really rough few days.”

“I understand. So, what's on the agenda for you two?”

“I wanna go to Peter Piper Pizza!” Clark declared.

“Then Peter Piper Pizza it is, pudding.”

“Perfect,” Matt said as he pulled the walkie talkie and list of emergency numbers from his pocket. He handed the device to Clark. “You know the drill. You can't go out of the five mile radius of the walkie talkie and this has my number, Violet's number, her pediatrician, her dentist, her-”

“I got it, Matthew,” Naomi sighed. “I've babysat for you since she was three months.”

“You can never have enough reminders,” he said. “I love you, sweetheartttt.”

“I love you too. Do you want a basket full of kisses?”

“Of course, boo! And I'll give you a basket full of hugs in return.”

Clark jumped from Naomi's arms into her father's before placing several wet kisses all over his cheeks.

“Mmmm, I love your kisses,” Matt declared as he gave his daughter a firm squeeze.

“And I love your hugs!”

Naomi was always touched by the lengthy goodbyes that the duo shared. The man reluctantly returned Clark to her arms.

“I'll see you later, boo.”

“Later, Daddy-O.”

The man laughed and watched as Naomi strapped her into the car seat that he'd chosen specifically for it's safety rating.

“Make sure that you hear the buckle click,” he reminded. “That's how you know it's secure.”

“I know, Matthew.”

“And give the straps a little tug to ensure that it's tight enough around her chest- but not too tight.”

“I knowwww, Matthewwww,” she groaned.

“Okay, okay. Bye, boo!”

“Byeeee!”

Naomi closed the door.

“Is the child lock on?”

“Yes!”

The man defensively raised his hands.

Naomi rushed to the driver's side of her car so that Matt wouldn't have time to give her a physical exam or a breathalyzer to ensure that she was stable enough to be driving like the last time she took Clark out.

“Double check your mirrors!” he shouted.

The woman ignored him as she started the car and took off. Matt swiftly jotted down the license plate and made a mental note of what the woman was wearing. He pressed the button on his walkie talkie.

“Testing. Testing. Daddy to Clark. Daddy to Clark. Can you hear me? Over.”

A response came in a few seconds later. “No, I can't hear you,” she said with a giggle.

He smiled. “Have fun, sweetheart.” Matt returned the device to his pocket before returning inside of the building.

“Matthew!” Violet snarled when she met him in the lobby. “I am hungry!”

“Okay, Mama bear. What do you wanna eat?”

“I don't know but I want food! Now!” Violet stormed out of the building.

Matt was actually excited about the hormonal journey that he was bound to go on with his wife throughout their second pregnancy.  

“Good luck,” a woman seated in one of the lobby chairs offered.

“I don't need it,” he said cheekily before rushing after the woman that was now sobbing by the car. “Baby, why are you crying?”

“Because! You don't care about feeding me! You're too busy worried about- hell, I don't even know what you're worried about but it sure as hell isn't feeding your wife!”

“I'm about to feed you right now, okay?” he calmly responded as if he was negotiating with a terrorist. “Just get in the car and I'll take you wherever you want to go to eat.”

Violet continued to cry as she snatched the car door open and climbed inside. Matt grinned and rushed to the driver's side before starting the car and speeding off.

---

“Go, Auntie Naomi, go!” Clark cheered the woman on. She sat in her lap and made sound effects as she followed the bad guys on the video game in the high speed chase. “Catch those bad guys so we can get more tickets!”

“I'm tryinggg.” Naomi shot out the bank robbers back tire, effectively ending the chase.

“Yayyyyy!” Clark cheered as the machine began to spurt out tickets. She snatched them up.

“What do you want to do next?”

“Pizza! Then prizes!”

“Sounds good.”

Clark skipped over to their table and plunged into her slice of melted cheese deliciousness while Naomi mindlessly nibbled on the crust of her slice.

“I thought I'd find you guys here.”

The sound of her wife's voice made Naomi's blood curdle. Out of sheer fear from the trauma,  Clark couldn't even make eye contact with the woman as she climbed into her aunt's lap and buried her face into the warm curve of her arm for protection.

Naomi took in Raven's disheveled appearance and there was something so off about the woman that she barely recognized her. “What are you doing here?” she demanded.

“If you didn't want to be found, you shouldn't have tagged your location in the picture you posted.”

“Raven, just leave, okay? You're scaring Clark.”

“Leave? Oh, so you want me to leave? I thought you were soooo concerned about me, wifey!”

Clark whimpered into the sleeve of Naomi's blouse.

“Yes! You're seriously pathetic right now if you're going to yell at me in front of Clark at Peter Piper Pizza!”

Raven suddenly felt dozens of children's eyes fixated on her as they tried to figure out what was going on. When she heard Clark's soft sobs, she knew that she'd hit rock bottom.

“I'm so sorry,” the woman sniffled as she rushed out of the building.

Naomi pulled Clark up so that she could cradle the weeping girl. “Sshhhh, CC, it's okay.”

“Does Auntie Raven want to hurt us?” she asked through tears. It broke Naomi's heart.

“No, sweetheart. Auntie Raven doesn't want to hurt us.”

“Okay,” Clark said skeptically.

“Finish your pizza, baby then we'll trade in your tickets for prizes.”

The girl wiped her eyes and returned to her spot in the booth. When she began to pick at her food, Naomi knew that she'd lost her appetite.

“Me too, Clark,” she softly exhaled. “Me too.”

---

The only thing that the wide eyed Matt could compare Violet to was Shaggy or even Scooby-Doo. She slurped, belched and didn't mind that food was flying everywhere as she ate. The woman was like a refugee from a foreign country where food was scarce.

“Did you just get out of prison?” her husband teased.

“Fuck you,” she replied as she spooned the pot roast into her mouth. “Mmm!” the woman screeched with full cheeks as a waitress walked by with food. Violet forced down what was already in her mouth so that she could speak. “Give me that cheesecake.”

“This is for another table. I could add a slice of cheesecake to your ord-”

“No, I want that slice right there.”

“Ma'am, I-”

“Give me the fucking cheesecake!” Violet shrieked.

The girl flinched and quickly obliged before rushing off to contemplate her life's choices and to retrieve another slice of the cheesecake. Matt pushed himself out of his seat and followed her. “I’m really sorry. She's pregnant,” he said as he palmed the waitress a $100 bill.

Moments later when he returned to the table the only thing left of the cheesecake were crumbs on the plate. And even those didn't last long as Violet held up the saucer and tapped the side, allowing the graham cracker bits to fall into her mouth.

Matt burst into laughter. “You are amazing.” The man watched in awe as the woman continued to pile it in. She even went after his food when she asked if he was going to finish his burger and fries. He gave them up without protest.

Violet ate a few bites before burping. “I'm done. I want the rest to go.”

The man obliged and after paying the bill that he wasn't surprised had reached over $100, he helped his wife out of her seat. For the first time, he noticed that her ass seemed to be filling out in a way that he'd never seen before.

Damn, he mouthed. When did baby get back? Since they were in public, he didn't want to disrespect her by giving it a squeeze. But when they made it into the car, he couldn't help but pull her into a kiss with more than sweet intentions behind it.

“Matthewwww,” she groaned as she pulled away. “Not here. Not in a fucking restaurant parking lot. I'm classier than that.”

“You are?” he teased.

It earned him a swat on the arm. “Fineee.” The man threw the car into gear and slammed on the gas until they were home.

The couple was barely pass the threshold when Matt pulled his wife into a kiss while he caressed her newly found curves. Violet's hands loosened the man's belt while he worked on the straps of the confusing designer top. Just as he finally found success in getting his wife naked, Clark's voice rang out over the walkie talkie.

“Daddyyyyy,” she chirped. “I won lots of prizesss!”

“Ignore her,” Violet ordered as she kissed her husband's neck.

“I can't ignore her. Look how excited she sounds.”

“She's always excited.”

“Yes, because I always respond!”

“Daddy! Are you there?! You said you'd always answer the walkie stalkie!”

Violet groaned. “Alright.” The woman cupped his dick through the thin fabric of his boxers. “Meet me in the bedroom when you're finished,” she whispered before sauntering up the stairs.

Matt fought the urge to watch because he didn't want the image of a nude woman embedded in his brain as he answered to his daughter.

“Hey, boo. Of course I'm here. What kind of prizes did you get?”  

“You'll just have to wait and see tomorrowwww.”

“Whoa, whoa, what do you mean tomorrow?”

“I'm spending the night at Auntie Naomi's.”

“Clark, nobody asked me if you could stay,” he said sternly. “And I never even went over the overnight procedures with her.”

“Well, I want to stay so I can protect her.”

“Protect her from what?”

“Evil forcessss.”

Matt exhaled. “And Auntie Naomi said it's okay for you to stay?”

“Yes, Daddy!” Clark shouted in exasperation. “Stop acting brand new! She always says it's okay for me to stay!”

Matt cackled. “Okay, sweetheart. I'll call you before bedtime, alright?”

“I don't have a bedtime! Go away, evil doer! Go awayyyy!”

“I love youuuu.”

Clark didn't respond but he knew that the girl heard him and that was most important. He dashed up the stairs and burst into his bedroom.

“Did somebody order multiple orgasms?!” he asked only to find his wife passed out in her blanket cocoon. “No,” the man gasped. “Nooo.” He rushed over to her and attempted to kiss her awake but the woman groaned and pushed his face away. “Fuck my life,” Matt grumbled as he stormed towards the bathroom, grabbing the nearly empty bottle of lotion on his way in.

>>>