#also anon please don’t do this again
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solarboyaaron · 1 year ago
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Ok I just got an anon just now and. I’m not doxxing anybody.
I’m not gonna stoop to Shade’s level.
Honestly, I really just want this to be like. Done. Enough with the stalking and threatening to involve my family. I don’t mind being peoples little ‘lol cow’ or whatever, but I genuinely want to be left alone. I’m enjoying my time on the internet, being as cringe and free as I like. Whether that makes me ‘chronically online’ is up to you, but I come here for fun.
Life is short and I just want to enjoy mine.
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crossbackpoke-check · 10 days ago
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i saw the d3 acha coho tiktok and saw your tag about how to spell s(h)(e)(a)(w)n and as I watched it with the roster pulled up next to the video so I could figure things out I HAD to come tell you that it was spelled 'shjon' because LOL. but then I saw your other post and saw that you not only already figured it out but you had a DIFFERENT tag about the 8-3 game last night. i know what game you're talking about; i listened on the radio. i've been sad ever since and it would make me feel better to tell you that you're not special - everyone takes advantage of our terrible powerplay and yet we REFUSE to stop drop passing. sorry you definitely didn't expect a salty shiny helmet fan in your inbox just please be gentle with us tonight. Christmas isn't for another month - stop lighting up our goalie :( although huge congrats on winning the tournament last year i was cheering for you so hard to defeat the Evil and you did :)
​feeling shrimp emotions right now as i try to convey the whiplash this ask gave me… first of all 🥺🥰😭 that you were gonna come tell me how to spell shjon and then 🫵 SAME GAME???
but GOD the experience of ��listen i know—shhhhh shhh shhh shhh i haven’t even started yet—i KNOW it looks cool when you do a no-look behind the back pass. it does! when it works. you know what we look like when it doesn’t work? fuckin’ STUPID!!!!” is universal. me 🤝 you 🤝 yelling at our hockey team to stop doing stupid drop passes!!!!
(p.s. wish: granted! most of it was the fact that your baby goalie did better than [redactedx2] and that’s all the shop i will talk here for purposes of not doxxing either of us lmaooo)
#RIP ANON I’M SO SORRY YOU WERE CATCHING STRAYS IN MY D3 HOCKEY TAGS 😭😭😭😭#my vendetta against [redacted] has literally nothing to do with your hockey team too it’s from a completely different sport 😭#does it help to know that a and i regularly debate your uniforms and i AM a shiny helmet defender i think they’re so fun#i just wish it was more incorporated!! put a little shiny in the uniforms!!! you don’t need that [redacted on the pants] to be THAT color#make it match the helmets!!!!! anyway this happens literally every time. i go BUT I LIKE THE PIZAZZZZ & a goes BUT THE SHINE I CAN’T SEEEEE#& then we both agree (bc i said so) that the color scheme needs work. i understand the reference it’s the execution!!#anyway i put a variety of devon levi mouth open HUNH meme / BEYONCÉ??? /🍹😎 reaction images to try and convey how your ask found me#but none of them fit right lmao the sheer ???!!!!????? specificity of getting clocked#but also like. then immediately being like ok we’re best friends united by a common enemy 🤝🥰🥰 making out w/consent w/tongue#liv in the replies#have not been able to truly rotate the joy you having the roster pulled up to tell me how shjon is spelled is bringing me im giggling#kicking my feet doing a little spin etc etc. i love y’all and the amount to which i just. ask things in my tags & y’all ANSWER me is 😭😭🥹🥹💕#also if you listened on the radio again i don’t know if you saw the handshake line shenanigans but PLEASE come to my dms i Have Questions#about to go put [redacted] and [redacted] together in alice’s teammates generator and i found an old note too??? about different guys???#and homoerotic behaviors. whatever is in the water with this match-up it’s chippy and also makes me 👀#i think a blood feud may be beginning… cannot wait for the next match-up it’s gonna be fun
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gayestcowboy · 1 year ago
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hey this may be a weird question so feel free to never answer but how did you go about gaining weight? you're so happy with it and i think it may be for me too but i wouldn't know the first step towards that happiness so,,
i’m gonna be so honest it just happened naturally when i went on testosterone. i didn’t drastically change my diet or exercise, if anything i ended up getting more exercise from walking all over my campus (i started t before i started college), and i definitely need to eat more than i used to, but nothing drastic. it’s just how my body reacted to having more testosterone. i didn’t expect it at all going into it, although i’m very glad it happened, but some people lose weight on hrt and some people dont have a weight change ag all, it just depends on the person. since i did literally nothing to gain weight other than hrt, and obviously i have no idea whether hrt is something you even remotely want to do, and hrt isn’t even a guarantee your weight will change at all, i cant do much other than share my own experience 😭 but i wish you luck in whatever you end up doing, and i hope you enjoy your body!
and this might be a weird answer, but if you feel comfortable, you could always try poking around in a weight gain fetish community somewhere online. it’s not really something i’m into so i can’t say whether or not anything will come from it, but i know it exists and it’s a group of people who know how to gain weight, and i’m sure some of them post about how they do it. i won’t give out any more medical advice on tumblr, and i hesitate to ask if anyone else has any advice, but i’m sure the very best thing you could do is talk to a medical professional about it, and just make sure to take good care of your body no matter how much you weigh. weight and health will never measure your worth as a person, but you should always try and take care of your body as best you can. and eat your veggies 👍
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ursamajori · 1 year ago
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hi friend idk if you particularly super mind about these things but the op of the “survived the barbenheimer” post is very very transphobic. just to let you know
hi! i do very much mind abt these things--i primarily use mobile, and my way of being aware of blogs like that is just. filtering a bunch of tags they use so when its a random meme i usually have. no idea lol. so thanks for letting me know
idk the best way to like. word this? but in the future when yall warn me about these kind of people (which i very much do appreciate) could you give more...idk i dont wanna say proof bc it sounds dismissive, i guess elaboration? like if its i dunno tumblr user "i-hate-trans-people" and i just somehow fuckin missed that (not this exact thing but smth similar has happened before. sometimes i am not very perceptive.) like. obv u dont need to but i know people will send these kinds of asks abt people they have drama with and i dont always have time to yknow. go and find the post and check the blog
normally i dont post asks like this but i figured it would be a good sorta. way to ask this bc ive never brought it up to yall and it would be unfair to expect smth without saying anything
i wanna be clear abt as well this isnt like. trying to single you out anon and i tend to ask this of people who send similar asks off anon privately as well theres just no way to do that with you since yknow. anon. but seriously, thank you for letting me know!
edit: someone pointed out how this person it’s VERY obvious once you click on the blog from the posts, i should have specified that since it. makes it more clear this was a general statement </3
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prentissluvr · 3 months ago
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GUYS IM SO SORRY i should’ve made an announcement or something but i just can’t get myself to write for dean. i took him off the list of characters i write so please no dean requests for the event! i'm so sorryyy aahhhh i just struggle with it so much, i am gonna write the one in my inbox though!! and i totally might change my mind abt this later, but im just trying to keep writing as stress free and enjoyable for myself as possible so that i don’t lose motivation! and the one fic i wrote for dean just sort of stressed me out LOL
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loves0phelia · 18 days ago
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Hi! I don’t know if you’ve watched part 2 of outer banks yet, and if you didn’t this request is a spoiler!!
Can you do JJ Maybank’s sister seeing him die and Rafe is just watching her break down and he’s comforting her while she cries in his arms? I’m sobbing over JJ right now 😭
Thank you!
Gone
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Summery: outer banks season 4 episode 10/the anon
Words: 1.6k
Warnings: SPOILERS, death, grammar mistakes.
A/N: i also sobbed, i cant believe it and thank you for requesting love youuu.
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The sandstorm hit suddenly. The air was thick, nearly solid with dust. You stumbled forward as the wind blew strongly, You screamed, begging JJ to come down before something terrible would happen but even if you pulled the scarf tighter across your nose and mouth every breath felt like swallowing shards of glass making it hard to speak. 
Everything was clouded and your goggles were smeared with sand dust. It was impossible to see your brother who was up high on that statue trying to find the blue crown you, the pogues and Rafe have been risking your lives for.
“Come down JJ!” You screamed as loud as you could, hoping he could hear you over the screaming wind. 
A surge of panic rose in you, he wasn't listening, only going higher and higher to reach the top.
“Hurry please!” You screamed again as the sandstorm was getting worse and worse. Squinting your eyes you could see JJ finally descending the statue after a while, carefully holding on to the rock.
“JJ, holy shit are you okay?” You rushed forward to him as he stumbled around frantically.
“I'm good! I'm better actually, I'm great. Look!” he yelled over the storm and held up the blue crown, it felt like a dream having it in front of you.
“No way, you found it” You both looked down at the dusty historical crown in silence for a second, sinking in it the victory that was so rare when it came to you and your twin.
“We got it!” He cheered, pumping his fist, jumping into place from all the adrenaline. The victory cheers didn't last long though, the next thing you knew shots were fired at you from the group who wanted to steal what was rightfully yours.
“Run, run, run” JJ shouted behind you as you ran through the sand blindly and desperate to find shelter.
The sandstorm roared with life around you, Yours and JJ's footsteps vanished almost as quickly as you made them, erased by the wind.
You coughed, your lungs stinging as you struggled to run down the stairs you had found leading inside the monument. 
But suddenly, a shadow appeared out of the storm. A strong hand gripped your forearms and in a sudden movement, your back was pressed on your “father's” chest, an arm around your neck holding on tightly, cutting your airflow and a sharp blade pressed into the side of your face.
“JJ!” you called out, trying to get out of his grasp.
“Let her go!” JJ shouted, his voice trembling with anger. He lunged towards you trying to rip you away from him but he only pressed the blade harder making you cry out. But Groff only shook his head.
You cried, struggling, and your heart pounding as Groff’s grip tightened. You fought against him, but his hold was unbreakable.
“You’re just like your mother,” Groff hissed, his gaze cold and unmoved. “Always standing in my way. Well, this time, you’re not going to stop me. Give me what I want”
“Let her go” He begged.
“If you had listened, we wouldn't be here JJ, you could have had everything. WE could have had the life we deserved as a family. All three of us. But now you get nothing. Nothing at all” Chandler pants like a maniac.
“I already have everything,” JJ says, shaking his head in disbelief. “I have everything I ever wanted. You want the crown? Sure, take it. I don't want it. Just let my sister go.”
“Give it to me, hold it out” He reached toward JJ for the precious object, his grip on you not loosening.
In a swift moment, an exchange was made. Groff grasped the crown, and JJ pulled you out of his arms.
“I got you” JJ breathed out with relief, like a weight was removed from his shoulders. He hugged you protectively. Holding your head against his shoulder like a shield. But then again, the victory was cut short.
“JJ, y/n” you were interrupted by the voice of your father, his call made both of you separate and turn to face him, JJ’s body still shielding you from further harm.
“It's a shame…you and I” You furrowed your brows and a gasp came out of your mouth when the sound of flesh being pierced rang out. 
“You should have given me the rope” Time was moving at a slow pace as the scene unfolded. Groff twisted the knife in JJ's stomach before pulling it out rapidly and running out into the desert.
"JJ!" You screamed, your voice raw with terror. You saw JJ stumble back, his hands flying to his side. Dark red blood was spreading through his shirt and across his fingers, and the sight of it hit you like a punch to the gut.
The world narrowed to the scene in front of you as you watched JJ fall, his face contorted in pain. 
“No, no, no” you cried, desperation thick in your voice.
You rushed to JJ’s side, catching him just as he stumbled. He looked up at you, his face pale and stained with tears.
“It's okay JJ, it's okay” You pressed into his wound, shaking terribly, sobbing when he let out a pained groan.
“No, please” you murmured, pressing your hand over the wound in a desperate attempt to slow the bleeding. “You’re going to be okay. Just stay with me, okay? Stay with me.”
“Hey, hey,” He whispered, his voice breaking. “Take care of the others for me, okay?”
“No! No” Your breaths shakes, your chest tight with sadness.
“I love you, y/n. You're the best sister anyone could ever have.” His gaze was beginning to drift, his eyes unfocused, and the strength in his grip was fading. Panic clawed at you.
“I love you, please don't go” you begged, but it was pointless he was already gone.
“No! No, no. Please! JJ, please” you shaked his shoulder weakly.
“John B!” You screamed, your chest burning from the lack of oxygen your lungs were getting.
“Pope! Rafe!” Your hands gripped your brother refusing to let go.
“Please JJ!” Your heart shattered completely, a part of you gone forever. Your brother, your twin, your best friend, the other half of your soul, gone. 
“Please” You pressed your forehead against him, your tears falling over the blood-soaked shirt.
The pogues came running towards you, sinking to their knees, calling out to him, crying, sobbing, mourning.
Everything in you gave out as you held onto him, you couldn't even fight when hands grabbed onto your shoulder to bring you away from your brother's corpse.
Your body fell limp into Rafe's lap. His hands held your body up as if he was your lifeline. 
“It's gonna be okay” He whispered against your forehead but you barely registered any of it, only sobbing, and screaming in pain against him. 
The Pogues stood in a tight circle, all eyes fixed on JJ as if somehow their stares alone could bring him back. But no one spoke, and in the heavy silence, the truth crashed over them, settling deep in their bones. JJ was gone.
Kiara’s shoulders shook, a small, trembling motion that quickly overtook her entire body. She fell to her knees, hands pressed to her mouth as she fought to hold back the sobs. 
Pope was beside her, his eyes frantically looking over the scene, he didn't want to believe any of it, as if it was a cruel joke.
John B stood, rigid.  His fists were clenched so tight his knuckles were white, and his jaw was set, teeth gritted as he tried to hold it all in, to keep the pain from breaking him apart. 
Rafe's arms wrapped around you gently, his hand resting on the back of your head as he let you fall into his chest. You buried your face in his shoulder, the grief and sorrow pouring out in waves as he held you.
He didn’t speak of the rivalry, the old wounds and the bitterness between your families; none of that mattered now. At this moment, all he saw was your pain, and he was there, his own heart breaking a little as he watched you crumble.
When the sobs finally subsided, leaving you weak and exhausted, Rafe pulled back slightly, brushing a strand of hair from your face, his eyes filled with something you’d never seen in him before—softness, understanding. 
“It's okay,” he murmured, his voice a promise, his hand gentle as he brushed a stray tear from your cheek. “I’ve got you.”
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You sat on the sand as a fire crackled in front of you, you had just buried him, the silence was thick nobody wanted to believe the truth. 
Your head pounded, even when you were softly laying on Rafe's legs using them as pillows. His calloused fingers gently rubbed your hair and you tried to concentrate on the movement in an attempt to forget about the previous moment but you failed.
“Groff said he was going to Lisbon” Rafe whispered above you, making your eyes open and looking up at him. His eyes met yours and he continued.
“If he was my friend or my brother… I would go after the guy that just killed him” The mention made your heart burn but he had a point.
“He's not wrong” Kie whispered, agreeing with your inner thoughts. You snuggled against Rafe's legs one last time before sitting up and leaning your head on his shoulder. 
“JJ would already be on his way to kill him if it was one of us,” you said and everyone's eyes snapped towards you, those were the first words you had spoken since it happened. 
“He'd get even,” John B added.
“Let's get revenge,” you said, your voice more confident than it was before, you felt a hand grasp onto yours and slowly you turned your head to face Rafe. He nodded and tightened his grip in a comforting way, never letting go.
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Send request please xx
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celesteleoves · 7 months ago
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hello! could you please do an izuku fluff one shot where he loves to sleep with reader in her dorm? i use she/her pronouns but gender neutral would be fine aswell if you’d prefer💓
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“I LOOK BETTER IN THE DARK.”
IZUKU MIDORIYA x fem!reader.
summary: what the request said!
warnings: reader and izuku have known each other since middle school, izuku being traumatized 😔, set before the second war!fluff otherwise i believe! kinda angsty for a minute.
a/n: guys… i miss him. he’s so sweet pls don’t hurt him anymore horikoshi. also ily anon ty for requesting this omg. pls send more 🤍
it wasn’t uncommon for your boyfriend to randomly show up at your dorm. normally, he would arrive approximately ten minutes after texting you that he was going to try to take a nap.
but, you knew your boyfriend and you knew he would arrive with his hair tussled and eyes wide and disappointed – from not being able to sleep on his own. you were used to izuku knocking on your dorm room at random hours, you’ve even grown accustomed to this routine.
currently, you’re sat by your door. playing with your matching all might keychain that izuku got you for your birthday when you were young.
knock, smack! knock.
you smiled at the noise, you made that knocking pattern up after one time while trying to knock on your door barely awake, izuku fell asleep and smacked his head off of your door then clumsily tried to knock to cover up the embarrassment he felt in that moment.
you stood up, rushing to your door. a soft smile already on your face.
“hi. i-” izuku tried to defend himself, yet again, he forgets that you are used to this.
“you couldn’t sleep, i know.” you softly nodded and motioned for him to come in.
he smiled crookedly as he rubbed the back of his head, trudging toward your bed and flopping on it.
it was late, around 9 pm, the moonlight replacing the suns glare.
you stood by the door for a minute, admiring your boyfriend.
he laid with one of his hands behind his head lazily, the other hand playing with your all might keychain. he looked so cute. his lips were turned upwards at the sight of the keychain.
the moonlight made his freckles pop, his dark-green hair looking more abnormally fluffier than usual.
you moved towards your boyfriend, plopping down beside him and lifting the covers over you two.
for some reason, your boyfriend just looked so ethereal during calm moments like this. just you two. no fighting for your lives or breaking bones. just peacefulness.
“i think i look better in the dark.” izuku mumbled quietly as he noticed your staring, he turned to look at you. his expression was shy and you felt your heart swoon.
you quietly chucked, “you always look good, izu.” you softly whispered as he became flustered. the boy curled up against you as he moved to rest his head on your chest.
tuffs of hair tickled your chin, causing you to giggle slightly as you played with his shirt. he wore a shirt that you gifted him at the start of the year, to celebrate him getting into U.A. with you.
“what happened to napping in your own room today?” you teased, not noticing your boyfriend moving his hand so it was closer to yours.
“i had a nightmare.”
your teasing smile dropped, you should’ve known. izuku’s been having terrors constantly after the first war. it was miracle when you and your classmates had even convinced him to come back to U.A. and rest.
“sorry, they just don’t happen when i’m with you.” he said quietly after noticing your silence, his words slightly muffled into your chest as you kissed his head.
“i’m glad they don’t.” you looked down, noticing his hand beside yours, he has been awkwardly fiddling with the sheets this whole time. he was scared to hold your hand. he didn’t want to hurt you.
you softly sighed, interlocking your fingers with his. you knew he felt safe when people held his hands. izuku began drifting into a slumber, the feeling of you holding his hand comforting him.
“i love you.”
you looked down at him, expecting him to reply only to see his eyes shut, mouth opened slightly as he slept. you felt your own eyes close as you basked in the feeling of holding your lover.
izuku midoriya is one of the strongest people on earth right now but when he’s with you, he’s just your izuku. just a kid who deserves a break from society and a well rested sleep.
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a/n: my baby. THIS WAS A LITTLE OFF TRACK and very short, i’m sorry anon i got a little carried away 😔😔 i hope you enjoyed this! 🫶
SEND REQUESTS! 🤍
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persephoneflouwers · 1 year ago
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negativepeanuthoarder · 1 year ago
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Hello! Happy June! It's Pride and I have another question (8/30)
HiHi, today we are again diving into the evolution of another word: queer!
The word queer entered the English language around the 16th century, and initially meant "strange", "odd" or "eccentric". (This is a slightly unrelated sidenote; as someone whose dialect of English is Hiberno-English, the word queer is still very commonly used to still mean this, and has also evolved to the word "quare" which can be used in place of "really" or "very" to provide adverbial emphasis <- like if someone is "quare tall" they're so tall that you're kinda in a little disbelief about it. Anyway just thought this was a fun side note because I really had not realised this word was controversial for people until I was on the internet)
Anyway, onto the late 19th century, the word queer began to have the connotation of "sexual deviance", before then starting to be used specifically about the "sexual deviance" of "feminine men".
The first, or at least one of the first, recorded time that the word queer was used as a pejorative for gay was in a letter written by John Sholto Douglas, 9th Marquis of Queensberry, about his son's relationship with Oscar Wilde. This letter was read out in Wilde's trial in April 1895 (in which he was being tried for "gross indecency" or "homosexuality"), and in it Douglas refers to Wilde and other gay men at the time as "Snob Queers". It is believed that American newspapers picked up this phrase and began using it themselves, thus spreading the pejorative to the US's vocabulary.
"The Concise New Partridge Dictionary of Slang" (1937) defined the word queer as "Homosexual. Derogatory from the outside, not from within. US, 1914", which tells us both that by 1914 it was a common pejorative or insult for gay people, but also, that queer people were using the word to refer to themselves as well. Around this time, queer, fairy, trade and gay all signified distinct "categories" of homosexual men. Historian George Chauncey notes in his book ("Gay New York") that queer would've been the self-identifier of ""masculine"" gay men.
We can also assume that this is what was happening in the U.K. as well, as a letter held in the National Archives shows us (you can look up the letter in full, search the full name of the person and "My Dear Billy"). This letter was written by a man named Cyril Coeur de Leon to ‘My Dear Billy’ in 1934. Billy was the owner of "The Caravan Club", a ""disorderly house"" of ""male prostitutes"", and in it he writes "Just a note to say that I am very disappointed about you. I honestly thought you were queer, but different from the others, and I liked you very much […] I have only been queer since I came to London about two years ago, before then I knew nothing about it." This use of queer is arguably ahead of it's time, given that at this point queer was exclusively about gay men, whereas de Leon mentions he "still likes girls occasionally".
Over the years though, queer has evolved from the narrow definition of "gay man" to "gay men and lesbians" to "anyone not heterosexual" to "not heterosexual and/or not cisgender". And despite the fact that for the majority of the time that it has meant "gay" it has been used by the community, some people are still of the opinion that the word is "too offensive" to be used, but thankfully, this argument isn't as common as it was in the 90s and 00s, though still annoying persistent.
And as for my question, today I want to know firstly, if you use the word queer yourself? and secondly, what is your favourite word/way to refer to the queer community? (for example, "friend of dorothy" is funny to drop into conversation, and today I spoke to some who said they were "looking forward to meeting other *limp hand movement* at [pub name] tonight!")
Happy Pride 🌈 🎉
I use queer sometimes? I have a hard time explaining the whole gender/sexuality/romantic deal and as dumb as it sounds I really don’t like labels all that much lol
But I still use Queer Relationship (bc my partner and i’s relationship is weird), Queer Community, and Queer Person to describe ppl - it’d easier then saying lgbtq if I’m talking really fast.
I dont refer to the community itself a lot haha - but I guess when I’m out and about with gay friends we just call it “The Gay Community”? Idk again Im a weirdo who hates labels lol
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crossbackpoke-check · 1 year ago
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Okay so this is gonna sound very unhinged
But the screenshot you posted of the doc for Omega Yamo had text
And I may have zoomed in and been able to decipher the words
And I’m obsessed with there being more than one Alpha in that scenario
And I think you’re a genius and I love your writing even though I probably wasn’t supposed to be able to read it
Again I’m sorry for being so insane but I couldn’t help it 🙃
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SCREAMINGGGG anon i am in love with you. i appreciate the level of unhinged sooo much, the only thing you have to be sorry for is inflating my ego to an enormous size
howmstever!!! i may have tricked you!!! there are actually two omega yamo fics in the works 🤐🤫 they just happen to exist in the same document right now because ??? why not
#until one of them gets enough words to kick the other out they will coexist peacefully &i will hop between them sooo chaotic &unproductively#i keep typing things and then redacting them about the other omega yamo fic for literally no reason like. i’m telling you about it??#it’s not gonna be a surprise??? but for clarity’s sake they are not related to each other/in the same universe#and yes one of them does have multiple alphas 🤭#both fics are incredibly self-indulgent (and by extension incredibly For Y’all in my inbox) like it is just y’all 🤝 me 🤝 omega yamo#also to the other yamo/nuge anon please do not fret i see your message!! it is in my inbox!!! i just have been keeping it there#so that i can look at it because it makes me happy and also is very good motivation 🥺🥰😭#do i have a tag for omega yamo??? do i need a tag for omega yamo???? at this point probably yes#liv in the replies#i am being soooooo normal in this message and i feel like i should tell you that irl when i read this each paragraph was my jaw dropping#and then i sat there and 💕🥰🦋💗 <- shrieking for like. five minutes while trying to type. what an honor#the!!! highest!!! compliment!!!!#once again reiterating though i am so slow at writing 😭 however!! i am planning to wrap up with apps & coursework next week#& if i don’t pick up an insane amount of shifts in the four days between moves i want to write sooo much. in so many different documents 🫡#bro ALSO??? i just went to the screenshot to see what you could’ve read out from the ask and do you got eagle eyes or a magnifying glass or#how tf did you read that. what witchcraft did you work to make my blurry ass picture readable zoomed in &can i have it bc i’m using this now
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23victoria · 6 months ago
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“what did you just call me?”❁
f1 grid x fem!reader
ft. lewis hamilton, max verstappen, lando norris, oscar piastri, charles leclerc, carlos sainz
authros note: thank you anon for the request!!! hope you like it🤍! just fluff and comedy ig!! any feedback is appreciated and please like, comment, and reblog!! hope you enjoy!! also sorry if your name is April!! 😭
f1 masterlist
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Max
You are sitting in your apartment, the scent of Max's cologne lingering in the air. The two of you have just come back from dinner, and you're now nestled comfortably on the couch. Max is s through channels on the TV, looking relaxed in a simple T-shirt and jeans.
"Hey, Marcus, can you pass me the remote?" you say absentmindedly.
Max freezes, his hand hovering over the remote. He turns to you, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "What did you just call me?"
You look up at him with innocent eyes. "I called you Max."
He shakes his head slowly, his piercing blue eyes narrowing. "No, you didn't. You called me Marcus. Who the fuck is Marcus? That’s a ugly ass name."
You feign surprise. "No way, Max. Why would I call you Marcus? I don’t know anyone named Marcus."
Max leans forward, his expression a mix of amusement and irritation. "Are you fucking with me?"
You bite your lip to keep from laughing. "I'm not sure what you're talking about, Marcus."
Face turning red, he crosses his arms, his biceps bulging slightly. "You definitely called me Marcus. You got a boyfriend named Marcus I don’t know about?"
You laugh, unable to keep up the act any longer. "Alright, you got me. It was a prank. I would never call you by someone else’s name baby, you know that."
Max's stern expression softens into a grin. "You and your pranks," he says, shaking his head. "Don’t do it again, you had my heart racing."
You lean in and kiss him on the cheek. "Promise, Max. You're the only one on my mind."
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Lewis
You're in the passenger seat of Lewis car, the city lights of Monaco illuminating the night. Lewis, ever the style icon, is dressed impeccably in a designer jacket and sunglasses, even though it's already dark.
"Lucas, can you turn up the music?" you ask casually.
Lewis takes his eyes off the road for a moment, a look of disbelief crossing his face. "What did you just call me?"
You glance at him with a confused expression. "I called you Lewis."
He shakes his head, a smirk playing on his lips. "No, you called me Lucas."
You maintain your innocent demeanor. "Lucas? Why would I call you Lucas? I think you're hearing things, Lewis."
He pulls over parking the car and turns to you, "I know what I heard. You said Lucas? Are you thinking about someone else while you're with me?"
You try to hold back your laughter. "Of course not, Lucas. Why would I think about anyone else when I'm with you?"
Lewis' jaw drops as he stares at you in shock. "Right there!?! Just now! You called me Lucas? Who the fuck is Lucas? And why is he on your mind?!"
You finally let out a laugh. "Alright, alright. I’m sorry baby! It was a prank."
Lewis shakes his head, sighing in relief, smiling. "You love messing with me, don't you? You almost made me shit my pants. I was getting ready to drive back home and say ‘fuck it’ to dinner."
You grin and laughing. "Not you getting ready to cancel dinner! You was gonna let me starve?!”
“Hell yeah! Coming in my car calling me another mans name!” he’s says exasperated.
“Baby, you know I would never call you by the wrong name." you say rubbing the back of his neck.
He reaches over and squeezes your thigh as he kisses you. "Just making sure. Because there's only room for one man in your heart and that’s me."
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Lando
You're at the beach, lounging on a sunbed next to Lando. The sound of waves crashing against the shore is soothing, as the sounds of people laughing fill the air, the sun shining brightly making your skin glow.
"Levi, can you pass me the sunscreen?" you ask without thinking.
Lando sits up, his relaxed expression turning serious. "What did you just call me?"
You look at him with wide eyes. "I called you Lando."
He frowns. "No, you said Levi."
You tilt your head, pretending to be confused. "I’m pretty sure I know my boyfriend's name is Lando not Levi."
“Well I'm pretty sure you don’t since you called me Levi, I heard you, unless I’m turning deaf at 24.” he says with an annoyed tone.
He takes his sunglasses off, his boyish face looking a bit hurt. "Are you sure you're not mixing me up with your side piece named Levi?"
You stifle a giggle. "Side piece?!? I’m not cheating on you, Lando. Why would I do that?"
He narrows his eyes at you. "Because you just called me another man’s name."
“Okay, but what makes you think you're not the side piece?” you say with a straight face.
He freezes staring you at jaw dropped, in shock not knowing what to say, “Wha-“
You burst out laughing, unable to keep the charade going. "I’m joking baby. It was a prank!"
Lando still stares at you trying to comprehend what just happened. Frowning he says “Why would I be the side piece?”
You start to laugh uncontrollably, “That’s what you're focused on! Seriously! I told you I was just playing with you!”
Lando's frown turns into a slight smile. "Yea but, I’m not side piece material, I’m main piece material.” he says softly.
You smile, shaking your head. “Yes Lando, you are main piece material, that's why you're my boyfriend.”
You take his hands in yours, “You being more offended being called a side piece than another man’s name is concerning.” You say in humor and slight disbelief.
He leans over kissing you on the nose. "Because we all know I’m boyfriend material. Unlike whoever this “Levi” is."
“You’re something else.” you say laughing at his antics.
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Charles
You're in the kitchen, helping him cook dinner. The aroma of fresh basil and tomatoes fills the air, making your mouth water. You take the freshly chopped onions and throw it in the pan.
"Chris, can you pass me the olive oil?" you ask casually.
Charles stops chopping vegetables and looks at you, bewildered. "What did you just call me?"
You give him an innocent look. "I called you Charles."
He shakes his head slowly, a puzzled expression on his face. "No, you said Chris."
You blink at him. "Did I? I don't think so, Chris."
He narrows his eyes, a hint of frustration in his voice. "You just called me Chris again.”
“No I didn’t, I just called you Charles.” you say seriously.
“Nope, you didn’t.” Putting down the knife, walking towards you. He says, “Who’s Chris?"
"I don’t know. I don’t know anyone named Chris.” You say trying to keep a straight face.
Charles steps closer, a small smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. "Well clearly you do because you just called me his name."
“I’m telling you I didn’t call you that. You’re just hearing things.” you say starting to get nervous.
“Am I?” he says, staring at you.
You can't help but laugh nervously. "Alright, holy fuck! It was a prank! Stop being all scary!"
Charles shakes his head, chuckling. "You're lucky I knew you were just joking. Just don't let it happen again." He says as he moves closer to your wrapping his hand around your neck squeezing it softly as he says “Your mine and mine only. Yes?”
“Yes.” you say breathlessly as he kisses you briefly before pulling away, smirking as he says “You burned the onions.”
“Oh shit!” you say turning around to turn off the stove as Charles laughs.
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Oscar
You're sitting in the living room, watching a movie together. The lights are dimmed, and the atmosphere is cozy and intimate.
"Oliver, can you pass me the ice cream?" you ask, your eyes glued to the screen.
Oscar pauses the movie and looks at you, confused. "What did you just say?”
“I asked if you could pass me the ice cream? you say confused.
”No. What did you just call me?" He says turning his body towards you.
You glance at him, playing innocent. "I called you Oscar."
He shakes his head, a slight frown forming. "No, you said Oliver."
You feign surprise. "Who the fuck is Oliver?"
He leans back, crossing his arms. "That’s what the fuck I’m trying to figure April, sorry I mean Y/N?
You gasp saying “Who the fuck is April?”
“I don’t know, who the fuck is Oliver?” he says as he shrugs his shoulders.
“Babe I called you Oscar so why the fuck are you calling me April?” you say trying not to laugh.
“Why the fuck did you call me Oliver, April? Why are you thinking about this man instead of paying attention to the movie?" he says.
You struggle to keep a straight face. "Stop calling me April!! And I’m not, Oscar. Why would I think about anyone else? Why are you thinking about some girl named April?"
He narrows his eyes, his face holding a scowl he says, "Because you just called me another man’s name, April."
“My names not April, Oliver.” You shaking your head while rolling your eyes. "I was just trying to annoy you, it was a prank."
Oscar's frown turns into a smile. "I know April. You really like messing with me, don't you?"
You grin and nod. "Yes Oliver, I can't help it!”
“But you know I would never actually call you by the wrong name baby." you say as you crawl into his lap straddling him.
He wraps his arms around your waist bringing you closer, kissing you. "I know baby, just making sure."
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Carlos
You're outside in your backyard, relaxing by the pool with Carlos. The sun is shining, and the sound of water gently splashing adds to the tranquil atmosphere. You lean back in your chair, enjoying the warmth, and then decide to add a bit of fun to the moment.
"Babe, could you get me a drink, please?" you ask sweetly.
Carlos gets up with a smile. "Sure thing baby!"
As he heads to the kitchen, you call out, "Thanks, Marcus!"
Carlos stops in his tracks and turns around, raising an eyebrow. "Marcus?"
You feign innocence. "What? I said Carlos."
He chuckles, shaking his head. "No, you definitely said Marcus. Who's this Marcus guy?"
You giggle. "What are you talking about? I said Carlos."
Carlos narrows his eyes playfully. "Alright, if that's how you want to play it."
A few moments later, he returns with your drink and hands it to you. "Here you go, my love."
"Thanks, Marcus," you say with a grin.
Carlos doesn't miss a beat. "Oh, okay." Without warning, he scoops you up in his arms.
You scream, "Carlos, put me down!"
He grins devilishly. "You said Marcus, remember?" And with that, he jumps into the pool, taking you with him. You both splash into the water, and when you come up for air, you sputter, "Carlos, what the hell?"
He laughs, brushing the wet hair from his face. "Oh, looks like you do know my name."
You roll your eyes but can't help but laugh along with him. " Of course I know your name baby."
He pulls you close, still smiling. "I know you do. I can play games too, cariño, if you want me to."
You both laugh, “No, no. You win.” you say pulling away from him. “For now." Then, with a quick motion, you splash water into his face and make a dash for the edge of the pool.
Carlos wipes his face, laughing. "Oh, that’s how you want to play cariño, you're so going to get it now!" He starts to chase you as you scramble out of the pool, both of you laughing.
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© 23victoria 2023-24 I all rights reserved. do not republish, steal repost, modify, translate or claim my work as your own
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starkwlkr · 4 months ago
Note
Oh my, imagine you and Hugh have a teen daughter who is like 16 or something, and she goes live and just keeps talking in brainrot terms while you don’t understand what she’s saying.😭😂
ps: love your writing💗
HOT TO GO! | hugh jackman
an: thank you anon for this request, it was so fun to write!! love youuuu
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“And there’s my mom . . .” Olivia had walked into your room where you were doing your makeup at your vanity. She held her phone in her hand pointing it at you. “‘Mother is mothering’ I know right? She’s out here serving cunt on a Tuesday afternoon.”
Serving cunt? Did you hear that right?
You stopped applying the red lipstick on your lips and looked at your daughter. “I’m a cunt?”
Immediately the teen bursted out laughing. “No, oh my god! I didn’t mean you. You look great, that’s what I meant.”
The comments on Olivia’s instagram live were going crazy. They found it funny that their favorite actress was clueless.
natsyelena y/n is so adorable 😭
y/nupdates please tell her she’s mother
“The comments are telling you that you’re mother.” Olivia said to you. Again, you were confused.
“I know.” You reply. “I have three kids.”
Olivia chuckled. She then set her phone against the vanity mirror and posed while you continued doing your makeup. It was date night and Hugh had gotten you tickets to see Stevie Nicks perform. Olivia was heartbroken she wouldn’t be able to see her favorite singer, but Hugh promised her they would go see her at her next show as a family.
“What does that mean?” You pointed at a comment that caught your eye.
y/nstyle donatella VERSACE 💜
Olivia looked at the comment and laughed. “It’s a meme, mom. Donatella commented that on Bella Hadid’s post.”
Another comment caught Olivia’s attention.
xmenarchive SHOW HER THE JOSH HUTCHERSON EDIT
Olivia gasped then grabbed your phone since hers was on live. She searched on YouTube for the specific video and showed it to her mom eager to see her reaction. As whistle played and pictures of Josh Hutcherson appeared, a smile formed on your face.
“It’s Josh! I haven’t seen him in so long.”
“Wait what?” Olivia paused the video.
“He visited Jennifer on the set of X-men when I was visiting your dad and we hung out. Your brothers were also there too.”
“And you never told me?!” Olivia yelled. “The mom lore is insane.”
After learning more about you, the comments wanted you to react to THE Pedro Pascal, Steve Harrington, and other specific edits. Olivia gladly showed them to you.
Once you saw the Pedro edit, you giggled. “I’m going to send that to Pedro.”
“Guys, hide the fanfics!” Olivia shouted at her phone.
After coming back from the corner store with snacks, Hugh walked into your room where Olivia was teaching you the HOT TO GO! dance. He looked so interested in what you two were doing.
“You can take me hot to go!” Olivia finished the dance. “Look, the comments are saying you ate that up.”
“What the fuck?” Hugh said when he heard that.
“Guys, don’t worry I’ll teach her everything,” Olivia took the phone from the vanity and saw her dad with snacks. Some comments had recognized Hugh’s voice so they demanded Olivia to show him. “After this I better be everyone’s favorite nepo baby.”
“You’re not even my favorite nepo baby.” Hugh teased. Olivia then showed Hugh waving hello to the live.
“The viewers want me to teach you the hot to go dance.” She read some of the comments.
“No.”
“Oh ok so you hate happiness in others? I see the type of person that you are, Huge Ackman!” Olivia left her parents’ room to go continue her instagram live in her room.
Hugh stood beside you confused. “How did we raise completely different kids?”
You shrugged your shoulders. “I don’t know, but I learned so many things today.”
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monzabee · 4 months ago
Text
the smallest man who ever lived - cl16
masterlist || part 2 || part 3 ||
Summary: The one where you’re thrown into a conundrum when you learn the news of your husband, Charles’, infidelity.
Pairing: charles leclerc x wife!reader; carlos sainz x reader
Word Count: 4.5k
Warnings: angst, cheating, crying, manipulation(?), charles is an absolute asshole (but so is the reader) (but she’s kinda also badass?) (toxic relationship?), even more assholish carlos (gasp), blackmail, mention of pregnancy, mention of sex and sexual acts, physical confrontation (literally just pushing someone off but still)
Request: “Hey girl can I request something angsty with Charles? Maybe Charles cheating on Y/N (we’re already famous and have been married to Charles for years) and the fighting, the finding out, his guilt, angst, etc.”
Author’s Note: hi, hey, hello!! thank you to the anon who requested this because i had the time of my life working on it, and it might be the first fic i wrote in one go for the last six months or so!! also thank you to the getting cheated on playlists i found on spotify and amy dunne for giving me the inspiration to make the reader as toxic as i could. special thanks to @norrisleclercf1 and @percervall who had to listen to me talk about this fic NONSTOP. this is definitely something very different to what i usually write, but i hope you guys enjoy! good morning, noon or night wherever you are, xoxobee
Please also note that all of my works are protected under copyright, and not available for reposting on other platforms. 
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There are moments in life where you feel like a complete and utter idiot. Although it could be for no apparent reason at all, there is a perfectly explainable reason why you feel like that right now, in the middle of your trailer on the set, with your manager and publicist both looking at you like you could explode at any given moment. It took you a good amount of time to wrap your head around the news, the news that wrecked you into a million of pieces which left you as the only person who can put them back together.  
“Let me get this straight,” you start, still trying to wrap your head around the news, “they were photographed leaving the club, and there’s a–?” 
“Sex tape, yes.” Your manager mumbles, earning himself a side-eye from your publicist. “It was so kindly attached to the email.”  
“And it is anonymous?” You ask, earning curt nods from both. “Well,” you manage to get out, pressing your lips together not to let out a sob, or a laugh, both? “That is very ambitious of him.” 
Your publicist shares a concerned look with your manager, then turns to you, “I guess so? How would you want us to handle this? I can buy us some time until these are released to public, but I think getting a statement ready just in case is essential given the fact that both of you are public figues. We can say that you’ll attend marriage councelling��” 
Your loud laugter cuts her off in the middle of her sentence. “And just why would we do that?” 
“I–” She gives you another concerned look as she softens her voice, which is quite uncharacteristic for her, you realise. “How would you want us to approach it then?” 
“I don’t want you to approach it at all.” You voice cuts through the tension, your gaze fixed on her. “I’ll handle it.”  
“But Charles–” She tries to reason, but you cut her off again.  
“Decided to get his dick wet where it certainly didn’t belong, he’s a big boy – he’ll survive.” Fixing her with a final look, you turn to your manager instead. “I don’t want this going to Charles or his team’s ears, that’s what the email said, and we should honour it, no?”  
His expression turns into a smirk, matching the one playing on your lips as he nods in thougt, “Would you like us to do anything else? We can talk with the production if you need a couple of days to… well, recuperate. Greta would understand.” 
“No.” Your answer is final as you shake your head. “She thinks this is an Oscar worthy project, I’m not throwing it away because my husband decided to think with his dick and not his brain. Just call my lawyers and tell them to be on stand by.” 
“Should I also book you tickets to Monaco still?” He asks in a monotone tone. 
“Well of course,” you reply in a sweet voice, widening your eyes for dramatic effect, “it’s a family event.” 
Your publicist eyes the both of you, “Okay,” as she drags the word out, “are you sure you don’t want to take a couple of days off?” 
“Positive. I have an EGOT to win.” Raising the script you have in your hands in the air, you announce, “I have lines I need to go over, is that all?”  
And as they leave your trailer to give you some space to ‘go over your lines’, you let a few tears escape your eyes, promising yourself that you would make Charles feel a thousand worse what he made you feel in the moment. 
It is not surprising or a sudden revelation that Monte Carlo has good weather all year around. But as it happens with the last few weeks following you learning about your husband’s infidelity, all you feel is cold – and no amount of warm weather is enough to make your heart feel warmer again. As you stand at the terrace of Café de Paris, overlooking the cityscape of Monte Carlo, all you can think about is how you just want to get this part of you plan over with as fast as possible.  
“Chérie!” The voice you hear makes a lump perpetually situate itself in the middle of your throat, but you brace yourself for the worst as you turn on your heels to face the person you’re most scared of facing in this whole situation. “Look at you, you look incroyable! You had me scared when you told me you were catching the redeye, and that we just had to talk!” 
“Pascale,” you breathe out as the woman pulls you into her arms with the warmness of any mother would do, and for that brief moment, you feel better than you have in weeks. “It’s so nice to see you again,” giving her the warmest smile you can muster up in the circumstances as you pull back, fixing your gaze at the figure behind her as you nod your head in acknowledgement, “Arthur.” 
“Maman is right,” Arthur says as he opens his arms, “you do look good.”  
“Well, thank you.” You reply as you give him a quick hug, and motion the table as you pull back. “Shall we?” Call it common curtesy, or cowardice, the fact that you don’t directly get to the point. Either way, you talk about what you’ve missed in the couple of months in which you’ve been away filming. You’re not necessarily paying attention, though the endtail of Pascale’s sentence catch your attention. “Excuse me, can you repeat that?” 
“Well, I was just telling how sad I was that Charles doesn’t come home as often this season. Though I understand he’s coming out to see you on set, distance can be so hard even for–” 
“He’s not coming out to see me, Pascale.” You voice is softer, and appears more broken than you would want it to be, but your words convey the message enough. It takes you a couple of moments to organise your thoughts, and Arthur calling out your name, to get you back into the moment. “There’s something I need to talk with the both of you, something I’ve already talked with Lorenzo, but I thought it would be better for you to hear it from me.”  
“Okay?” Arthur mumbles, then gives you a supportive smile, “You can tell us anything. Though don’t tell me I’m about to be an uncle because I don’t think my ego can take it at the–” 
You attempt to swallow the lump in your throat as you direct your words to the woman sitting across from you. “I’m divorcing your son, and I thought you should hear it from me and not him.”  
It takes a few minutes for both Pascale and Arthur to say something, and it concerns you that you somehow managed to give your mother in law a brain aneurism, but eventually, she manages to get out, “What? How? Why? Are you okay?”  
“I’m… fine.” You reply, albeit it comes off calculated. “I found a couple of weeks ago that he was cheating on me, I’ve came back to give him the papers myself.”  
“He what?” Arthur exclaims, then realises the level of his voice, and lowers it down as he asks, “Are you sure this is not a misunderstanding? The guy has been in love with you for over a decade, he wouldn’t do this.” With a resigning sigh, you find what you’re looking for in your phone and hand it over to Arthur. Who then, upon seeing what you have pulled up, immediately hands it back to you and turns to his mother, “Trust me you don’t want to see it.” 
“I’ve came to tell you the news, and well, to apologise.” You turn to face Pascale again.  
“Apologise?” She repeats, “Why on earth would you apologise to me when my son cheated on you?” 
“You’ve been nothing but kind to me ever since we’ve met, both of you.” You acknowledge Arthur with a look, and then focus your attention back on the woman, “Though I will make sure you don’t get caught in the crossfire in any way, I wanted to apologise for what I’m about to put your son through.”  
You honestly don’t know how you manage to act as if everything has been going fine in your life during race day. Given the fact that your husband doesn’t expect you to be at his race due to your rigorous filming schedule, and his family members being willing to hide your existence from him, you have no obstacles in your way to carry out the rest of your plan in motion. Which is exactly why you’re sat in the dark, waiting for your husband to walk through the doors of your apartment overlooking the city. With you seemingly being absent for the weekend, he has no reason to not believe that he is coming to an empty house.  
So, imagine his surprise when he enters his home; with his girlfriend in his arm, no less, and sees his wife sitting on the couch with her legs crossed and a drink in her hand. The look on his face is priceless, and despite all the pain and frustration you’re feeling, it manages to bring you some semblance of joy, knowing that it’s going to hurt him just as much as it hurt you.  
“Ma chérie,” Charles stammers, eye wide as he looks at you like a deer caught in headlights, “I – I didn’t know y–you were coming back this weekend.” 
“Well obviously,” you scoff, taking a generous sip from the drink in the glass tumbler in your hand, “otherwise you wouldn’t bring your little girlfriend into my house to fuck her.” You hear a gasp from the scaredy brunette wedging herself closer to your husband’s side, and for the first time you take a good look at her – young, much younger than you, tall, leggy; all the telltale signs that she is exactly your husband’s type. Tilting your head to the side, you rest the glass on the arm of the armchair you’re sitting in, “If you could leave now, I would greatly appreciate it.”  
You hear Charles whisper something in her ear, probably telling her to leave and that he’ll contact her tomorrow, and watch as she gives him a scowl, screeching, “You’re just going to let her throw me out?” 
“Well, considering the fact that this is my house, yes.” You give her a look of pity, watching her face light up with anger.  
“Listen to me, you bitch–” She starts, but your husband quickly cuts her off.  
“Mon cœur!” He exclaims, “S'il te plaît!” 
“Yes, listen to him, like a good little girl,” you egg her on, a smirk widening on your lips as you start swinging the leg resting on your lower one, choosing to focus on your nails instead of your husband trying to soothe his lover. 
You hear her scoff, take a few steps as her heels click on the marble floor of the entrance, “I wouldn’t be so calm if I were you, I’m not someone you want to be on bad terms with, considering the fact that he’s going to leave you for me!” 
“Oh, honey,” you coo, focusing your attention back on her and seeing the look of concern in your husband’s face through the corner of your eye, “and when did he tell you that, like a year ago? Two? Three?” A realisation dawns on her face as the smug expression starts to fade. “Don’t worry, though, you can have him when I’m done with him.” Pushing yourself off the armchair, you down the rest of the drink in the glass before slamming it down onto the glass coffee table. “And not only do I not care if you think I'm a bitch, but I hugely prefer it. Now get the fuck out of my house before I call security and get your ass thrown out.”  
You watch as she looks at Charles with indignation, lets out another screeching sound and slams the door behind her as she stomps out of your apartment. Only then you turn your gaze back to your husband, who has the guts to look at you with a worried look on his face. “How long have you known?” Is the first thing he asks you, taking a few steps closer.  
“A couple of weeks, a month, maybe?” You answer him, leaving your place to get to the small bar in the corner of your living room to get another refill of your drink. “There’s a video of the two, it somehow got into my hands, and it has very graphic details of the two of you having sex.” Popping a lemon into your cup, you make your way back to the armchair and sit down, “Are you stupid enough to cheat on me and make a fucking sex tape, Charles?” 
“I-I didn’t mean to–” He tries to plead, but you cut him off with a shake of your head.  
“You didn’t mean to what?” You ask him; your voice soothing, almost understanding, and it does the job of fooling him. “Cheat on me? Fuck another woman in my bed? Break the vows you’ve made?”  
“Ma chérie,” he whispers, “please.” 
“No.” Your voice is colder all of a sudden. “Tell me how long this has been going on for. Was I right? How many years?” 
“It started five years ago,” his voice is soft, somber and he tries to appear as genuine as he can in the situation, you suppose, “but I knew her, from before...” 
“Before what?” You’re seething now, the complete opposite of his calmness, “Did you fucking cheat me when we were dating, Charles?” 
“Ma chérie,” he gives you another pleading look, “please, I can change. I’ll go to therapy.”  
Now that, manages to get a bark of laughter from you. It’s ripped from the back of your throat, making you throw your head back as you lose yourself in the laughter to the point that there are tears in your eyes when you finally manage to calm yourself down. Putting the glass down on the coffee table once again, you wipe them off, mindful of your mascara, as you shift your attention back onto your husband. “Are fucking kidding me right now?” He gives you a concerned look, hands on his hips as he opens his mouth to answer you, but you quickly shut him down again. “You were bringing her into my house to fuck her, I caught you, I have your fucking sex tape – which is going to be streamlined for the world to see within twenty-four hours, do you honestly think I would go back to you?”  
“Wait, what?” He exclaims, looking at you with wide eyes and a shocked expression. “What do you mean they are going to streamline it, why didn’t you go to the lawyers? 
“I did go to the lawyers,” you shrug, innocently, “my lawyers,” you point out. “Why would I cover up your mistakes after everything you’ve done?” 
“Because I’m your fucking husband!” He barks, his arms widening to his sides as he finally loses his mask and his composure.  
His little tantrum only makes you let out another laugh, “Now, you’re my husband? Not when you’re cheating on me when I’m away shooting, but when you need me to clean up after your mistakes?” 
“How did you even get the video?” He asks, eyes narrowing down, “Who- who– who?” 
“Who? Who? Hoo? What are you, a fucking owl?” You exclaim, this time raising your voice. “You’re honestly more concerned about where I got it and not about the fact that the entire world is about to see you fucking someone other than your wife?” 
“What are we doing to do?” He asks, “Fuck, I have a race tomorrow.” 
“We’re not going to do anything.” You shrug, leaning forward to grab the glass and take another sip, “Or scratch that, we’re actually going to do something.” You stand up from the armchair, walk towards the table and hand him the file. “Congratulations, we’re getting a divorce.” 
“That is not happening.” He scoffs, not even bothering to look at the papers.  
“I don’t think you’re in the position to bargain with me, Charles.” You seethe, “You’re going to sign the damn papers, and you’re also going to sign away your rights to the baby.”  
“What the–?” He looks at you in disbelief, “You’re pregnant?” 
“Congratulations, it’s a boy.” You bite out, “Like you wanted.” 
“You’ve been drinking the entire night.” He points to the glass, “Do you expect me to believe you’re pregnant?” 
Offering him a sweet smile you hand him the glass, tipping it towards him, “It’s soda water, would you like a sip?” 
“Don’t make me do this,” he pleads, “give me another chance.” 
“I would’ve, if you were honest with me from the start.” You resign, a sincere look in your eyes. “I’ll give you a choice: us, or her.”  
He rears back with the offer, looking at you in disbelief. “What?” 
“You either choose me and the baby or you choose to be with her, and in that case, I will never let you near my baby, Charles.” You shake your head, wrapping your arms around your stomach protectively.  
For a second, his eyes linger around your stomach.   But you know his choice when he meets your eyes again.  
“What have we done to each other?” He whispers, and you can barely see the tears in his eyes.  
“We didn’t do anything, Charles. I gave up everything for you, but you just took me for granted.” Walking back to the dining table, you grab your coat and bag, and when you come face to face with him again, your voice is soft despite all the anger you still feel towards him. “You, Charles Leclerc, are truly the smallest man who ever lived.”  
The hotel lobby is calm and empty as you sit at the bar, and it’s surprising when you consider that fact that it is the weekend of the Monaco Grand Prix, meaning that there must be hundreds and thousands of motorsports fans visiting. Not that you’re complaining about the silence, of course. After the night you’ve had, silence and calmness are all you could ask for.  
“I’ll get a whiskey, please, whatever top shelf stuff you’ve got.” A voice cuts through the moment you are having, and you instantly recognise the distinct accent of the stranger sitting next to you. “Thought you were in the States, finishing off filming.” This time, the comment is directed to you, and you roll your eyes as you push the empty glass towards the bartender on duty.  
With a sigh, you turn to the man on your right, “What do you want, Carlos?” Your voice conveys your lack of energy, and Carlos is not dumb enough not to notice the dark circles under your eyes beneath your makeup.  
“I came to check on you.” Is his answer. Simple, curt and to the point. You’d certainly appreciate it more if you had the patience for his antics.  
“Well, you did, have a good night.” Slamming down a hundred-Euro bill onto the counter, you make a move to get up from your place, but a gentle hand on your wrist stops you. “Let me go.”  
Though there is no venom to your voice, Carlos knows that it is not the time, nor the place, to test your patience. “I’m sorry,” he starts and when you take a good look at him, you can tell that he’s being sincere, “I really did want to check up on you, and considering the fact that you have a perfectly good penthouse but instead in a hotel, I think I was right to do so.”  
Crossing your arms across your chest as you get back onto the barstool with a huff, you glare at him lightheartedly, “I didn’t want to stay in the same house as him,” raising your eyebrows, you continue with a lower voice, “thanks to [email protected], but I’m sure you know what I’m talking about.” The way his cheeks redden under the dim lights of the lobby bar would make you chuckle under normal circumstances, but you push the thought aside, “Honestly, what were you thinking? You’re lucky it was me who realised it was you, if it was my agent or publicist, we’d have another scandal to deal with.” 
“Yeah, yeah,” he brushes you off with a swat of his hand, “I’m sorry I put you into that position.” 
“Don’t be,” you mumble, tilting your head to the side, “I wouldn’t have known if you hadn’t sent me the video. Just tell me why you did it.” 
“What?” He turns you with a confused look on his face.  
“Why, Carlos?” You ask, voice encouraging yet soft, “Why did you send it? Why now?” 
He keeps quiet for a while, not answering your questions but not taking his gaze off you either. Eventually, he exhales a deep sigh as he gives you a sheepish shrug, “I didn’t like the way he treated you. And I didn’t want to make you worry about it without concrete proof, so I guess everything just... worked out.”  
“Huh,” you let out a small hum in agreement, “I guess you’re right.”  
Expecting more than the words you chose to answer him with, he raises an eyebrow as he takes a big gulp of whiskey from his glass. “That’s it?” 
“Well, what more is it there to say?” You ask, sheepishly shrugging. “We’re getting a divorce; he’s going to move out and I’m gonna make sure the entire world knows just why.” 
Carlos flags down the bartender as he mumbles, “I feel like you need a stronger drink if we’re going to talk about your impending divorce, cariño.” 
Taking a deep breath and exhaling an even deeper sigh, you shake your head. “I can’t.” Thank God Carlos is one of the people who is the proud owner of a braincell around you, because he catches your insinuation quickly.  
With widened eyes, he quickly turns towards you, eyes softening as you offer him a sad smile. “Dios mío,” he murmurs, eyes running over you worriedly, “are you okay?” 
“Well... no.” You let out an unexpected laugh at his expression, patting him on the shoulder lightheartedly. “I’ll be fine, Carlos, I’m a big girl. I can handle this.” 
“I know you will,” he assures you, “but does Charles know?” 
Now that manages to bring a grimace to your face. “He signed his parental rights away along with the divorce papers.” The look he gives you after hearing your words has you worried that his eyes are going to pop out of their sockets, but you try to calm him down as best as you can. “Carlos, it’s fine.” 
“It’s most certainly not!” He exclaims, his voice echoing in the almost empty hotel lobby. “Is he out of his mind?”  
You give him an awkward smile and another shrug of your shoulders. "I... feel like whatever I’m going to say is going to be wrong. So... yes?”
“Cariño,” he says, exasperated, “how are you so normal about this?” 
“Lots of women raise their kids as single mothers while working, Carlos.” Your expression quickly taking the form of a frown, “I can handle this, I don’t need Charles or anyone else to hold my hand and tell me I’m doing such a good job.” 
“I know you can do this alone, tonta,” he rolls his eyes as the endearment making you roll your eyes, “but you’re not going to be alone. Because I’m here.” There’s a certain finality to his words. And just as you’re about to object to his words, he quickly shuts you down. “I know you can do this on your own, but you don’t have to, okay? I’m going to be with you every step of the way.”  
“What if I need waffles in the middle of the night?” You ask, your eyebrow raised in a skeptical way.  
“I’ll adjust my pancake recipe.” His reply his immediate, and he shrugs lightly as he adds, “Pancakes are better, anyway.”  
Rolling your eyes you continue, “What if I need someone to hold my hand in the delivery room? It can get quite gruesome, you know?” 
He provides you with another nonchalant shrug of his shoulders. “I’ve never really been affected by it.”  
“Okay, this is ridiculous, Carlos!” You exclaim, pushing yourself off your seat as you turn your body to face him. “I don’t need you to bail me out, I don’t need your help!” 
“I know you don’t,” he nods.  
“I am capable of doing this on my own!” You shriek, and the fact that your face is starting to get progressively redder worries Carlos.  
“I know you are, but–” he tries to reason.  
“No buts! I’m going to be a good mother, okay?” You point an accusatory finger towards him. “I’m going to choose him!” 
The way your voice breaks at the end of your sentence has Carlos instinctively pull you into his arms, which is not that hard given the fact that you are almost the same height as him as you stand in front of the bar stool he’s sitting on, and he doesn’t say a word as you sob into his chest – letting out all the emotion you’ve bottled up over the past few weeks, no less. He doesn’t you offer you empty promises or tries to soothe you with cliché phrases. Instead, he stands still, holding you between his arms as you sob continuously into his chest. Giving the bar tender an awkward smile over your shoulder, he hands him his card to close out your tabs.  
He only starts talking again once you’ve pulled away and trying to wipe the remnants of your tears from under your eyes. “Do you feel better now?” He asks, handing you a napkin.  
“Yeah,” you mumble, sniffing as you play with the corners of the napkin. Then, you flip your eyes toward his, and fix him with a glare. “You are not becoming my kid’s stepdad.” 
“Of course not, cariño,” he assures you, “I’ll be the dad that stepped up instead.” 
You let out a teary chuckle as you slap him lightly on his chest. “I’m serious, Carlos.” 
“So am I.” He replies softly, and you can see the genuine look on his face. “You’re not alone anymore, I’m choosing you.” Tentatively, he presses his hand softly against your stomach as he maintains your gaze. “Both of you.” 
And though the last thing you want is a promise, this one seems like a real one. So, you let yourself believe that he might just keep it up. 
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5sospenguinqueen · 4 months ago
Text
Who Cried More - Oscar Piastri x Driver! Reader
Summary: When Yn fills in for a sick Alex Albon, it's fairly easy to tell who is most excited about her debut race in F1.
Warnings: Fluff. 2024 season. Williams driver
Requested: Yes by anon
Faceclaim: Lia Block (as she is a Williams driver) but imagine who you like
Main Masterlist
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user1 @/oscarpastryyy being a bit optimistic there. she’s never raced in f1 and she’s in a williams
→ user2 yes but this is the woman who won f2 in her rookie year so
→ user3 plus she’s a woman! if anyone can force that williams into doing something spectacular, it’ll be her 
oscarpiastri woohoo. i can’t believe i’m going to be beaten at a race by my amazing girlfriend
→ mclarenf1 oscar, this is not the kind of optimism we expect
→ notlogansargeant please, she’s still in a williams 
→ landonorris mate, we all know you’re a simp but you’re supposed to want to beat HER
→ yn_ln are you just jealous that you won’t be his #1 on the grid this weekend?
→ landonorris hey! i will always be his #1
logansargeant looking forward to having you on the other side of the garage
→ alex_albon you never say that to me
→ yn_ln i’ll see you at team torque first!
→ alex_albon is there anything you haven’t taken from me?
→ lilymhe no. she’s had me since williams signed her as the reserve
→ oscarpiastri pardon?
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f1 just posted
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liked by yn_ln, oscarpiastri and others
f1 a phenomenal race delivered by @/yn_ln as she stands atop the podium for a maiden win in her debut race!!!! this also marks william’s first grand prix win since 2012
14,569 comments
yn_ln what an unbelievable day. i don’t think i’ve stopped smiling. i can’t thank everyone at williams enough for the opportunity given to me. definitely a day to remember 
oscarpiastri THAT’S MY GIRL! EVERYONE LOOK AT WHAT MY GIRL DID
→ yn_ln thank you sweetheart. you had such an amazing race as well
→ landonorris you could celebrate that i got p2 :(
→ oscarpiastri BUT MY GIRL GOT P1!!!
→ landonorris @/yn_ln please go back to just watching races
→ yn_ln oh…
→ landonorris wait, no, i’m sorry. you did a great job
→ oscarpiastri yes, she did! she did an amazing job! 
logansargeant well done, mate. great weekend with you
→ oscarpiastri back off (but also show more enthusiasm)
→ logansargeant YOU GO, GIRL (better @/oscarpiastri?)
→ oscarpiastri yes
charles_leclerc fantastique job, yn ❤️ proud to call you my daughter-in-law
→ yn_ln omg a trophy and charles leclerc congratulating me
→ oscarpiastri you promised you wouldn’t do this if i let you meet him
→ yn_ln whoa, what happened to being proud of me
→ oscarpiastri THAT’S MY GIRL! 
alex_albon um, you can keep the car in this case
yn_ln just posted
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liked by oscarpiastri, maxverstappen1 and others
yn_ln what an unbelievable day. i got to share a podium with my favourite boy and make history. a massive thank you to everyone who has supported me throughout the years. i wouldn’t have made it this far without all of you 🤍
8,456 comments
oscarpiastri whoa, this morning i was your handsome man. why has my masculinity been demoted
→ landonorris because you cried your eyes out for over an hour 
→ yn_ln @/mclaren you better have made sure he hydrated after 
→ oscarpiastri you care about me 🥹
→ landonorris so do i 🙄
oscarpiastri okay but i love you so much and you’ve worked so hard for this. and know you’ve shown all the idiots who doubted you just how amazing you are. i’m so lucky to call myself your boyfriend and i can’t wait to see your trophy displayed on our shelf at home
→ yn_ln right next to all of yours, my gorgeous man
→ oscarpiastri yay i’m a man again
→ landonorris not to me you're not
nicolepiastri fantastic job, sweetheart. don’t think i’ll be making it to pilates in the morning 🍾
→ oscarpiastri the best reason to cancel
→ yn_ln 💕
user4 i love the fact that she used her f1 academy helmet to honour where she started and she ended up winning with it
williamsracing a weekend to remember 
→ oscarpiastri heck yeah it is. she got you some points! 
→ user5 oscar being yn’s biggest hype man is adorable
→ user6 the fact that she overtook him on the last few laps and he still hasn’t got his maiden win but he doesn’t care because he’s so happy that she got hers
→ landonorris we get it, he’s whipped
→ user7 and you’re jealous that his attention isn’t on you anymore 
oscarpiastri just posted
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liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc and others
oscarpiastri my sweetheart, i am in awe of you. tonight we celebrated not only your debut in f1 but an exceptional win. i know by the time you see this, your head will be pounding and you’ll be begging me for greasy food and paracetamol but i cannot wait to see what you do next 
5,328 comments 
user8 ladies, get you a man who cried more than you did at your maiden win
→ user9 he hasn’t got his own win yet but he didn’t care. he sprinted his way over to her sobbing
yn_ln baby i love you but why did you post that picture of me. i don’t think i even remembered my name at this point 
→ landonorris yet you remembered your boyfriend enough to snog him for 10 mins straight
→ oscarpiastri don’t shame her. she just won a grand prix. she can snog me as much as she likes 
→ landonorris @/yn_ln no but seriously, please don’t come back
→ mclaren lando, pr said you can’t say that anymore
→ landonorris but she’s stealing my oscar 
→ yn_ln and your trophies
→ williamsracing we’ll let that slide because we’re so proud 
logansargeant that pic of oscar carrying yn is only a sliver of how down bad he is
→ charles_leclerc i can attest to that. he also carried her purse the entire night 
→ georgerussell63 and held her hair back when she did no hands shots
→ oscarpiastri it’s called being a GOOD boyfriend
alex_albon sorry i couldn't be there to celebrate but being bedridden turned out to be a good thing this weekend
→ oscarpiastri i can’t thank you enough for being sick
→ user10 not this guy acting like he's the one who won 😂
→ oscarpiastri my badass girlfriend won and that is close enough for me
→ yn_ln my heart 🧡🤍
oscarpiastri i can’t wait to share the track with you next year
→ user11 what! say sike right now. yn contracted for f1 next year?!
→ yn_ln osc, please tell the internet that you’re still drunk
→ oscarpiastri oops
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A/N: I wrote this prior to Osc winning today but I did make some amendments after
Requests welcome!
Tag list
@rosecentury @peachiicherries
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yeonzzzn · 8 months ago
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I'm in a spooky vibe rn and I've been thinking about one of the enha members (hyung line) with a scream mask ( y'know from the movie sjshsj) about to m*rder reader but idk they get turned on and both got freaky 🫦
fffuuuuccccckkkk anon your brain is 😍 love this idea so much (fun fact scream is my favorite slasher movie and I even have a ghost face tattoo) I hope this is exactly what you’re looking for🤭 it’s funny because I also main ghost face in dead by daylight so when I saw this request I got SOOOO happy ~ I also made this a lot longer than I expected to but oops🤭🤭
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chill & kill: sim jaeyun
part one of chilling & killing 🔪 | spotify playlist
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pairing: jake x afab!reader word count: 6.4k
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You sit up on the couch, eyes widening as you grab the TV remote and turn up the volume. 
“The mysterious ghost face kill strikes again, killing two more college students in the library this morning. The bodies were discovered by…”
You quickly shot to your feet, grabbing your jacket and camera and slipping your feet into your boots tying them quickly as you slipped out your dorm door. 
You never were so happy to live on campus as you ran from the dorm building and across campus to the library. Students surrounded the main entrance and you pushed your way through finally seeing the inside of the library. 
“Hey!” a police officer yelled at you when you slipped under the caution tape, “You can’t be back here!” 
You eyed him, pulling out your student journaling ID, “I have every right to be here.” 
The officer tried to protest, but you kept your stride, making your way to the bodies ignoring the yelling officer behind you. 
The closer you got, the more the smell of blood filled your senses, making your skin crawl. Your journaling partner was already on the scene, standing at the edge of the other caution tape marking off the two bodies. 
You stood beside him, your heart sinking as you took in the bodies of the two females lying dead in front of you. They were just freshmen. Barely made it into college and fully started their lives. 
From what you could see, they were stabbed multiple times in the chest and abdomen. One of their necks was slit, and the other looked like they were stabbed through their throat. They suffered, for sure. 
“Who found them?” you asked him, taking your eyes off the dead bodies and turning to your partner. He had one arm crossed over his chest and gripped his elbow as his other arm was reached up and fingers gripping his chin. 
He slowly tilted his head to look at you, streaks of his black hair fell into his eyes, “Funny enough,” he sighs, “Sunghoon and myself.” 
You completely turned your whole body to him, “That’s why you’re here before me?! Jake, what happened?!” 
Jake chucked, “You're more worried that I was here before you?” you narrowed your eyes at him, and he sighed again, completely wrapping his arms over his chest, looking back at the bodies. You could have sworn you saw a sparkle glint in his eyes. Jake has always been excited to be on the scene, same as you. But he enjoyed it a little bit more than you. He’ll make one damn good detective one day for sure, “Wanted to check out a book and saw the door already unlocked for the campus not even fully being opened yet. And that's when we found the bodies.” 
“Where is Sunghoon now?” you asked, looking around the library, spotting him with the librarian and being questioned by a detective. 
You went to walk over, to ask him questions, but Jake stopped you, putting a hand on your shoulder and pulling you towards him, his arm wrapping around over your chest, “Don’t question him, he’s really shaken up,” You wanted to protest, only for Jake to squeeze you tightly against him, your back pressing further into his chest, “Please, YN, he’s my best friend. I’ll take care of it. I promise.” 
You sigh and nod. Letting Jake take the lead with this one. 
But you still had a job to do. So you pulled out your camera, taking a few photos. Once you finished with the photos, you pulled your journal from your back pocket, asked Jake a few questions, and took his account down then turned back to the bodies and took your own notes. 
You circled the area, taking in every inch and piece of information you could. Jotting down everything in your little notebook. 
Jake kept his eyes on you, watching you do your thing. His eyes sparkled more the longer his eyes lingered on you. He eventually dropped his gaze and went back to looking at his best friend, watching as he sat at one of the tables, knees pressed to his chest and hands curled into his hair. The small smile Jake had fell at the sight of his best friend and—
“Jake!” You called for him, bringing his attention back to you, “I think I found something.” 
“Oh?” He walks over to you and kneels down on the floor beside you, your camera resting on your knees as you point your finger toward one of the dead girls, “What am I looking at honey?” 
You groaned and rolled your eyes, “Under her body, there’s a black glove,” you looked at Jake. His jaw clenched tightly, “The killer must have accidentally lost it, dropped it, or whatever. Maybe she fought them or something. I don’t know. But I want to figure it out.” 
You took a few close-up photos of the glove and turned back around to show Jake, noticing a scratch mark sliding down the left side of his neck. You hadn’t seen it before since you were standing on his right side, but it looked deep and irritated, “What happened there?” You reached up to touch it, but he grabbed your hand quickly and set it down at your side. 
“Hoon and I were wrestling earlier at our apartment and I hit the side of our entertainment center, I am fine.” 
You thinned your lips into a line, boys will be boys you guess. Their apartment was a lot smaller than the dorms on campus, they must have been fucking around at a good spot to have knocked Jake into their entertainment center. 
Eventually, the police shooed you and Jake off the scene. Forcing you two to head to the journaling office. You printed off the photos you took and made copies of your notes, passing them to Jake. 
You glanced at the clock, it was now ten thirty am and classes would be resuming like normal, so you and Jake went your separate ways. 
Jake was still new to being a journalist. You were a club of two, consisting of just you and another girl who helped write the articles for you while you took care of the rest. She wrote her own things, mostly on the sports or other small crimes that happen on campus, but with the ghost face killer making his rounds, you took up the role of this case with her helping on the side. At first, you took it all on yourself, but as the body count started piling up, you needed the help. So you let her help and put out an application for an extra set of hands, which Jake answered. 
You’ve seen him around campus before he joined you. Was born and raised in this town. Being the town's sweetheart and golden puppy boy. You did some research on him before allowing him into your club, can’t have the killer join you, right?
He was the captain of his soccer team in middle and high school. Has taken his school’s team to the championships multiple times and was the heartthrob of the school. He donated to charity when he could and volunteered at the police station on the weekends in hopes of landing a good detective job there after graduation. He was the whole definition of a straight-A good boy student. Perfect for your team. He became your partner and you taught him everything you knew. When Jake joined, the body count from this ghost face killer was only three. But with the two bodies that were found today, it was now at fifteen. 
In between your classes, you found yourself back at the club office, pinning the new photos to the corkboard in the back of the room, wrapping red string between the pushpins and possible suspects. After staring at the corkboard for what felt like hours, the other female club member came in and you helped her write the article. Give her your notes and advising as she writes. 
Jake popped in and out of the office as well, brainstorming with you about the suspects and the time of events that happened. You both spun in circles that led to nowhere. You ask Jake again about speaking to Sunghoon, and he shoots you down, “Give him some time. I’ll get the police report soon and it’ll help, I am sure.” 
A week has gone by since the murder in the library. You ended up shifting the corkboard from the office and into the corner of your kitchen, using the fluorescent light of the kitchen bulbs to light the board more. You leaned against the back of your couch, it being the furthest you could step away from the board. Biting at your nails as your eyes scanned every murder case. Every newspaper article and police report on the board. 
Nothing made sense. Nothing connected. Whoever this killer was, they were good. Covered their tracks without so much as a piece of hair at any scene of their crimes. Until the glove. 
You ran your hands into your long hair, scratching at the back of your head. You needed that police report that Jake still has yet to give you. Needed to speak to Sunghoon. There were missing pieces and those two things were important. You looked over to the clock above the kitchen sink. It was almost one thirty in the morning. But you still got up and slid into your sneakers, pulled your jacket on, and bounced out the door. 
Finding yourself in front of Jake and Sunghoon’s front door, knocking loudly. There was no answer. So you did the next best thing and called Jake’s cell phone. 
There was some shuffling on the other end of the door and a groan. The door opened and you find a half-awake Jake before you, his hair a mess and spreading in every direction, wearing a plain white tee shirt and a pair of black and blue checkered boxers, “YN,” he sleepily growled and then yawned, “It’s almost two am, what is it?” 
“Can I have the police report?” 
Jake blinked at you, “Huh?” 
You crossed your arms, “The police report. Can I have it?” 
Jake let out another yawn, “It’s at the school, in the office.” 
Of course, it was. And the campus is closed and if you get caught sneaking in just to get a piece of paper…You sigh, “Thanks anyway,” you softly say, and turn around to walk down the stairs but stop, “Can I talk to Sunghoon?”
Jake scoffs, leaning against the doorframe, “It’s almost two am,” he repeats, “Why are you out here so late? There’s a literal killer running around here.” 
You knew that. And still took that risk to come out here. The killer had to be a student at your college. Every murder had been college kids. It had to be another student. That’s what made being out here so dangerous. 
“I know,” you shrugged, “But I can’t stand by and do nothing.” 
Jake frowned, “You know you’re allowed to actually be a college student right? Live a normal life too?” you shrugged again, and he just scoffed again, “YN, go home and rest. Let the detectives with actual badges handle it. We can only do so much.” 
You narrow your eyes at him, “Let me speak to Sunghoon.” 
Jake stands his ground, “No. Go. Home. Before you get yourself killed.” 
You roll your eyes, “See you tomorrow then.” 
Jake mimicked your words and watched as you walked down the steps before walking back inside and going back to sleep. 
You didn’t understand why Jake was so against you speaking to Sunghoon. Maybe he was being protective? Sunghoon didn’t look the best after finding the bodies. He was probably so shaken up. But it only made you want to speak to him more. And that need only grew more when you noticed Sunghoon’s car wasn’t in its normal parking spot beside Jake’s. 
Meaning he wasn’t home. 
You’ve respected Jake’s wishes on not to talk to Sunghoon, but this matter was getting serious and Sunghoon just might be the big break you needed. So you quickly walked off the apartment complex, glancing back to make sure Jake was outside, and pulled your phone from your pocket as you kept walking and dialed a number. 
“Hello?” 
“Sunghoon, where are you right now?” 
You found him atop the bleachers of the soccer field just like he said he would be. A soccer ball sat between his feet, grass scuff marks were at the ends of his jeans, and sleeves of his hoodie rolled up to his elbows and sweat dripped down the side of his face. It didn’t take a genius to figure out he came here to kick the ball around. Probably as a distraction. 
You sat down beside him, “How are you holding up?” 
Sunghoon scoffs, “Holding up as in a week ago I found two dead bodies in the middle of the library or holding up because I’ve been questioned left and right by everyone or my best friend/roommate has smothered me to stay home and take time.” 
You felt bad for him, mostly for what you’re about to ask him. He wanted to obviously forget what he saw, who could blame him? It takes special people to see a dead body and not be fazed by it. 
“I’m sorry for asking you to do this again…” 
Sunghoon just shrugs, “If I am being honest, I’ve wanted to talk to you for a while now.” 
You raised your brow, “Yeah?” 
He nodded, “Jake was against it,” he took a deep breath, “Something was off that day…with him.” 
“What do you mean?” You placed a hand on his knee, “You can tell me anything. Start with the beginning.” 
Sunghoon looked you in your eyes, then looked off into the distance at the field, “He told me that morning he was meeting our coach, for a one-on-one coaching session. At first, I didn’t think anything about it, being he was a soccer prodigy or whatever.” You nodded, remembering how much of the soccer star Jake was back in high school, “So you could probably understand my surprise when I got a call from our coach saying he tried to get ahold of Jake and then he confirmed with me that they did in fact not have a meeting that day.” 
You sat back against the bleacher seat behind you, staring off onto the field, letting the gears in your brain slowly turn, waiting for Sunghoon to continue. 
“I got scared, rushing out of the apartment and searching everywhere for him. Scared and thinking I was going to find my best friend murdered somewhere, ya know?” You understood, with this killer on the loose everyone was watching their backs and afraid. Who would be next? Who is next? “But I found him, lingering around the library building, digging through his soccer duffle bag. My heart almost stopped when I saw him…alive,” he took a deep breath, “So I confronted him, and he played it off that he did have a practice, but was with his coach from high school.” 
You looked back at him, to read his face. Seeing how pale his skin was becoming, “I believed him at first, thinking maybe I misheard that morning. So we started walking back, but he kept digging through the duffle bag, looking frantic. He wasn’t acting himself. Said something about needing to go to the library, about finding a book or something, and then took off. But I followed after him. I didn’t want to leave him alone, not with ghost face running around. But when I got to the library, I…couldn’t find him. I saw him go through the back door instead of the front. But once I walked in and noticed all the doors were already unlocked…then I found the bodies.” 
You squeezed his knee, “It’s okay.” 
He nodded, swallowing and looking down at the soccer ball, “I smelt the blood first and then noticed their bodies. And then…then there were footsteps behind me and I knew that I was next. But the library walked in through the front entrance and started screaming, her eyes darting to me, saying we did it. I turned around to see Jake standing behind me. His skin was pale and sweaty. Eyes wide as he stared back at me and then at the bodies and the librarian. He’s never been surprised to see the bodies. He’s been working with you for over half a year. So when I saw the look on his face…the surprise that was there.” 
You opened your mouth to speak, but Sunghoon kept going, “The weirdest thing is his duffle bag was missing from his shoulder,” Sunghoon scoffs, “How did it just disappear.” It was a good question. A very good one. “He hasn’t been the same since then.” 
You tried to lighten the mood, “Maybe you knocked something loose in his head when the two of you wrestled the other day.” Sunghoon gave you a confused look, “You know? He said you two got too close to your TV stand and he got scuffed up by the edge of it. Making a scratch on his neck,” you pointed to the right side, tracing a finger down the side of your neck to mimic where Jake has his slowly fading scar now, “It’s right here.” 
Sunghoon raised a brow, “I don’t know what you’re talking about. We haven’t wrestled inside the apartment.” Your smile faded. Sunghoon’s phone started vibrating and he pulled it from his pocket, seeing Jake’s caller ID on the screen, “Guess he noticed I wasn’t home.” Sunghoon locked his phone, ignoring the call, “I haven’t been telling him when I’ve left the apartment. So I better prepare myself with a talk when I get back.” He stood up and started walking down the bleachers, “Thank you for listening to me, I don’t want to suspect my best friend, and it probably isn’t even him. He’s just weird, I guess.” 
You watched as he disappeared before standing up and finally finding yourself back at your dorm and in bed. Replaying Sunghoon’s story over and over, trying to piece it all together. It still didn’t make sense. None of it did. Nevertheless, it didn’t stop you from texting Jake, asking him to meet you at your dorm as soon as he could tomorrow, and him responding he had soccer practice but would be here right after. 
“You should really keep your front door locked, YN, there’s a killer out there.” Jake teased you as he made himself at home, dropping his duffle bag into a chair at your kitchen table, his eyes going to the corkboard, “Make any progress yet?” 
You stared down at the duffle bag quickly before looking up at him, then back to the board, “No I haven’t. I left my door unlocked on purpose. Knew you’d be coming here.” 
Jake smiled at you and stood beside you at the back of your couch, looking at the board, “We’ll catch him, don’t worry honey.” 
You glanced at him slightly, your heart winced at the nickname he’d given you. You looked to his neck, seeing the scratch still healing but faded, being nothing more than a pink line. 
Jake looked down at you, giving a smile, “Can I freshen up in your bathroom? I bet I don’t smell the greatest from practice.” 
You scrunch your nose, “Yes, please. You smell.” 
Jake just rolls his eyes playfully and slides his hand up and down your back quickly before leaving your side, “I’m stealing your deodorant.” 
You waited until you saw him turn the corner and heard the bathroom door close and lock before slowly walking to his duffle bag. 
You didn’t want to suspect Jake anymore than Sunghoon did. But his story last night didn’t add up. No part of it did. Jake’s actions didn’t add up. Jake’s story he gave you didn’t match Sunghoon’s or the librarian's. None of the pieces were adding up no matter how much you tried to force the pieces together. 
You looked down the hallway, then back at the bag, and slowly unzipped it, your hand flying to your mouth quickly to stop any noise from coming out. You took a couple of deep breaths and continued looking into the bag. 
The police report you asked for along with the glove from the scene of the crime was in the bag in a ziplock bag. Along with the other matching glove and the ghost face mask and the black suit. You pulled the mask out of the bag with shaky hands. Why did Jake have these items? You knew. You knew why and still tried to find another explanation. But after seeing the contents of his bag…the pieces of the puzzle fit. Everything clicked and made sense. 
“Don’t you know it’s rude to go through people’s things, honey?” before you could move, a knife was pressed to your neck and his other arm was wrapped around your waist, “I expected better from you than to snoop around.” 
Jake’s hot breath was hitting your ear, sending chills down your spine. Any doubts you had were now out the window. Jake is ghost face. Jake is the killer. 
“Keeping secrets is very rude too,” you retorted back, dropping the mask back into his bag, “But I figured you already knew that I found out, hint why you leave your bag so easily for me to look through.” 
Jake chuckles, squeezing his arm around you and pressing the knife further against your skin, “Can’t get anything past you, can I?” 
“Why?” you asked, tilting your head at the movement of him brushing the side of his face to yours. 
“Why did I do it?” he nuzzled his nose on the shell of your ear, “You’ll need to be specific, honey.” 
You swallowed, “Everything.” 
Jake chuckles again, “Because it’s fun.” It was such a simple yet spine-chilling answer, “You think I played this fucking good boy persona because I actually wanted to? No, no. I had to play that persona. To hide my secret. This is all a game to me, YN.” 
“It’s why you joined our club,” you swallowed again, “To make it harder for us to figure you out.” 
Jake shrugs, gently biting at the shell of your ear then rubbing his nose against it again, “I thought it would add to the fun, honestly. Yeah having an inside made it so much easier. It covered my tracks well. Until you started picking up on every. Fucking. Thing.” he hissed, tightening his grip, “You made it harder to cover up my tracks. Picking apart every smallest thing with each murder. I was lucky you didn’t suspect me, that was until you started poking your nose more into my business, you don’t think I didn’t know you tore the office apart looking for the police report before coming to my apartment? That you talked to Sunghoon even after I told you not to?” 
“You have our phones and the office bugged,” this should surprise you, but it doesn’t. It made sense. 
He pressed his lips to your ear, “Smart girl. Think I wouldn’t bug your phone? Or my best friends?” 
“Jake, you were going to kill him, weren’t you.” 
Another low chuckle, “Yes,” your body stilled, feeling cold, “It would have been a pity, really, to kill off my best friend all because he also stuck his nose where he shouldn’t have.” 
You looked down at his bag, seeing the bag gloved, “You went back to the library for the glove, you fucked up.” 
He growled in your ear, “Shut up! That bitch fought me instead of taking it. I didn’t even realize my glove was gone until after I murdered them both and fled the scene. That’s when Sunghoon showed up. I knew I had to go back and find where the fuck my glove went before someone else did. I didn’t know he was following me until I went to go back and check the bodies after tearing apart the other side of the library and saw him standing there. I quietly set my bag in one of the reading rooms and locked the door, slipping my knife into the back of my jeans. Preparing myself to kill my best friend.”
“All to keep your fucking secret,” you snapped at him, his hands on your body getting tighter.
“Watch it, honey,” he hissed, “You do have a knife to your throat right now.” 
“She fought you right? Probably knocked off your mask too. She saw your face, and you acted quickly and sliced her throat. Not before she left her own scratch on your neck.” 
Jake nodded, a wide smile on his face, “Nothing gets past you. You’d make a great detective someday, honey.” 
You needed to turn him in. Needed to get out of here and turn him in before he could kill anyone else. Fifteen. He’s murdered fifteen people. Probably more before he took up the ghost face mantle.
Jake pressed his chest to your back, “You know,” he whispers, “I’ve dreamed about doing this with you, my knife to your throat,” he rocked his hips against your ass, “It’s so fucking hot.” 
It was now or never. You tilted your head to the side, taking the skin of his forearm between your teeth and biting hard. 
“Fuck!” he shouted, his hand flexing and dropping the knife to the floor and his grip on you loosening. 
You pushed him back with your back and sent him falling to his ass. You barely made it two steps away from him before both of his hands were on your ankles, tripping you to the floor and pulling you towards him. 
You kicked your legs but not getting out of his strong grip. Jake worked fast to flip you over onto your back, his hands now at your wrists and holding them up and above your hand, pinning them to the floor. He straddled you, locking his legs around yours to keep you from wiggling them. 
“Stop fighting me!” he growled, using all his weight to pin you to the floor. 
You stopped, chest rising and falling as you stared up at his beautiful killing face. 
He held your wrists down with one hand and reached for his knife with the other, chuckling as he once again held the knife to your throat, “You look so pretty like this baby, all underneath me like this.” 
Jake was so turned on by this. He’s only dreamed of having you pinned underneath him with his favorite weapon against your skin. Dreamed what you’d sound and look like. This passed his expectations. It went even further than that. His cock twitched in his pants seeing the look of anger all over your face. 
“You get horny every time you kill someone?” you spat out at him, the fire in your eyes burning. 
Jake cocked his head, “You’re not afraid of me?” 
“Why would I be afraid of a horn dog who likes killing people?” 
Jake laughs, adjusting his legs from yours, using his knees to spread your legs apart, sliding himself between them, “Baby, you’re the only one I’ve ever got horny over. The others were just killings to kill. But you? You do something to me.” 
From the moment Jake first saw you on campus he wanted to be buried balls deep in your cunt. Wanted to fuck you so hard as he softly made cuts on your arms to watch you bleed as your moans of pain and pleasure filled his ear holes. Wanted to cum so deep within you and make you his. 
He had more than just joined the club to hide his killings as his reason. He wanted to get closer to you, get to know you. Then kill you after he got his dick wet. But what he didn’t expect was you figuring him out so soon. His plans got pushed up. He wanted you afraid of him as he killed you. He didn’t expect you to look at him with fury, so unafraid. 
Jake leaned down, being inches away from your face, the knife pressing harder against your neck, “You get me so hard,” he rocked his hips between you, his hard cock rubbing against your clothed cunt. You tried to not whimper, to keep your firm face, but the effect he was having on you down south was obvious. He wasn’t stupid, you knew that. 
You’d be lying if you said you haven’t been crushing on Jake since he walked into the club for the first time. How couldn’t you? He was perfect. Still was as he sat atop you with a knife to your neck. 
You relaxed your body, “If you’re going to kill me, then do it.” 
Jake smiled, “Want me to?” He released your hands from his grip and slid the knife from your neck and down to your shirt, his free hand looping his fingers at the collar, using the knife to cut a line, tearing the fabric and exposing your laced bra and skin. Jake tucked his lip between his teeth. Fuck you looked so much better than what you did in his dreams. So much better than he imagined. He slid the tip of the knife down your chest, rounding it around your breast and down your sternum, “Where should I start?” He placed both hands at the sides of your head and bent down, lips brushing against yours, “Tell me, baby.” 
You lifted your head, connecting your lips to his. Taking in the taste of his cherry chapstick and the softness of his lips. He rocked his hips against yours, moaning into your mouth, “Start by taking the rest of my clothes off.” 
He laughs against your lips and then pulls away, setting the knife down at your side to pull his famous white tee shirt off his body, “Yeah?” you nodded, eyes darting to his bare chest and abs, “So fucking dirty,” he cooed, “Should have known you were into killers.” 
You sat up on your elbows, ready to reach for the button of his jeans, but found the knife back in his hand and the tip pointing at your chest, “Lay back down, baby, no need to be so impatient.” 
His free hand touched your shoulder and gently pressed you back to the floor. You kept your eyes on him as he unbuttoned his jeans, the knife still in hand as he wiggled out of his jeans and boxers, leaving him bare to you. 
You watched as he took his length between his fingers, slowly pumping himself, him biting his lips. You were growing too impatient. Needing to feel him against you, in you, “Jake,” 
“Shhh, honey,” he whispers, dropping his hands to your shorts, “I know.” 
The cool metal of the knife brushed your skin as he pulled your shorts and panties down your thighs. Goosebumps formed on your skin and making Jake chuckle, enjoying this more than he’d thought, “You love the way my knife feels against you?” He tossed your clothing somewhere off into the void of the room, settling himself back between your legs, his tip prodding your entrance, “love the way it feels to glide against your skin?” He sent the knife sliding up your tummy, his hips pushing his cock in your pussy, slowly stretching you. 
Jake bottomed out, the tip of his cock kissing your cervix. He hissed out in pure pleasure of finally being buried so deep inside you, the pleasure of how fucking good you felt wrapped around him, “fuck baby,” he smiles, sliding the knife to your waist, wanting to cut open your skin and see how pretty your blood would look pooling out, “feel so good and I’m not even moving.” 
You bucked your hips up against him, wanting to feel any kind of friction. Jake drops the knife to the floor, his hands pinning your arms above your head again, “I told you to stop being so impatient.” 
“Jae, please,” you begged, wrapping your legs around his waist, “I need you.” 
Hearing you beg for him had him gone and all he cared about now was fucking you. To make you feel so good until you’re cumming around his dick. 
Jake started out slow, burying his face in your neck, “Why aren’t you afraid, hmm? I could kill you right now.” 
You leaned into him, squeezing your legs tighter on him to push him even further into you, “Because I have secrets of my own.” 
Jake chuckled, bucking his hips harder and faster into yours, his lips pressing to yours. Tongue sliding down your throat and exploring your mouth. One hand leaving yours to cup your breast, his thumb and index finger pinching your nipple, “Tell me your secrets.” 
“You already seem to know them all, stalker,” you hissed, throwing your head back against the floor at him pinching your nipple harder in the same movement of him pushing his dick hard against your cervix, pressing so hard to break whatever barrier that was stopping him from completely filling you whole as his hip bones knocked against yours. 
“Tell me anyway,” he whispers between kisses, now sliding his mouth down to your ear, licking the shell of it, “I don’t know what you haven’t texted or physically talked about.” 
“I have feelings for you,” you felt insane saying it out loud. Felt crazy that you even admitted it to him. To the person who was fucking you into pure bliss. To a murderer, “I’m obsessed with you, Jake.” 
Jake bit down into your neck, both of his hands sliding underneath you to wrap at your shoulders, fucking his hips against you faster. His teeth sank into your skin tearing it slightly, a small sprinkle of blood escaping. 
“Fuckkkk,” he moans, tasting the brassy liquid on his tongue, “Even your blood tastes good.” 
He was fucking crazy. You knew he was. But everything about him drew you to him. Made you want him more. 
And him hearing how obsessed you were with him made him even crazier about you. 
“Such a good girl,” he cooed, “Letting me fuck you like this, looking so pretty for me this way.” He bucked his hips faster, adjusting his legs on the floor to spread yours even wider, giving him more access to hit your weak spots and to hit them just right. 
You pulled at his hair, “Jake!” you moaned out his name, the knot in your stomach threatening to snap, “I’m going…fuck…I’m going to cum.” 
“Please,” he groaned, “Cum for me baby,” he sticks his tongue out, flattening it against the bite he left on your shoulder, licking up the new blood that pooled out, “fucking cum around my cock for me, honey.” 
A few more thrusts and you came around him. Tingles spread throughout your body at the feeling of your release. Jake moans at feeling the mess you’ve made on his cock, him working his dick faster in your cunt to chase out the release he wants. The one he’s dreamed about having with you. His hand only did so much for him with his thoughts while back at his apartment. But now he was balls deep in your sweet pussy, having you right where he wanted you. 
“Gonna cum soon,” he panted, hands squeezing your shoulders, “fuck I want to cum in this cunt so bad.”
You pulled at his hair harder, the overstimulation hitting you hard, “Jae, I can’t—“
“I know, baby,” he pressed his forehead against yours, his brows furrowing and eyes shut tightly, “Going to fill this pussy to the brim, understand? This pussy is mine.” 
Jake pressed a kiss to your lips and lifted up, taking your legs and pressing them to your chest, pistoning into you faster but sloppy, “Shit,” he hissed, “Fixing to cum—fuck—I’m cumming, honey, I’m cum—“ one final thrust, and his white ropes spilled into you. He pressed his hips against you and held them there, making sure every last drop of his cum made it deep within, none to be wasted. 
“Fuck,” he cursed, slowly lifting himself back up and dropping your legs back to the floor, “Sex with you was so much better than in my head. I only dreamt how good this pussy would feel. How good it’d feel to cum in you.” 
Jake was definitely more obsessed with you than you were with him. And he honestly didn’t care how obvious it was. 
“Fuck I am in love with you.” he chuckles, his hands rubbing up and down your thighs. 
You tilted your head to the side, seeing the knife sitting there idle. Jake clocked where your eyes landed, but he wasn’t fast enough as you quickly grabbed it, being the one who now held the knife to his throat, the fire in your eyes back. 
Jake might have just came, but his dick twitched and hardened again between the walls of your fuck hole. His crazy smile is so wide and his eyes so lustful. Seeing you so ready to end him right here and now made him crazier. Made him crave you even more. 
He wouldn’t kill you now. No, no. How could he kill the love of his life? How could he slide that knife into your skin and cut you open? You were precious to him, more than what he thought before. Maybe the sex drew him in, but you weren’t getting away from him that easily. 
“Awe, babe,” he cooed, taking your wrist in his hand and slowly removing the knife from your hand, “This is how this will go now,” he tossed the knife across the room and out of reach, pinning your arms back to the floor, slowly rocking his hips, “You will keep your fucking mouth shut, got it? Close this ghost face case and if anyone asks you don’t know anything about it. Give it up. All for me, okay baby?” 
You nodded, not being able to say no to those brown eyes. It was toxic, whatever relationship you just found yourself in. You became that girl in books and movies who fell for the killer. It surprises you at how fast you were willing to drop everything for him. To keep his secret. 
He kisses you gently and fucked you on the floor until you both came again and again and again. 
What did you get yourself into?
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beloveds-embrace · 7 days ago
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Sooo much angstttttttttttt 😭
I need the boys to wake up and do whatever it takes to fix it, please, I can't take the angst 😭😭😭
Does this count as fix-it? 🤔 hope you enjoy, anon! Also this turned out far longer than i thought it would lol
First Part
Another shift slowly happens within the duchy, palpable. The whispers of servants echo louder than ever, growing sharp and cutting in the empty halls you once used to frequent. They still avoid you, but now they wonder and whisper of your health. It’s not just them; the men you’d once hoped you’d at least be on an amicable basis with slowly change as well, the longer your absence haunts the halls and galas.
John is the first to act. It’s hesitant at first, awkward even, as though he can’t figure out how to approach the shattered remains of what he’s ignored for so long. He stands outside your door one evening, his shadow stretching under the flickering candlelight, fist raised to knock. But he doesn’t. Not at first. He falters, as if the weight of his guilt roots him to the spot.
When he finally does knock, it’s tentative, barely audible.
“…Are you awake?” His voice carries a softness you’ve never heard before, but it grates against your numbness.
You don’t answer. Your eyes barely flick towards the door, not moving from where you are curled on your side.
He lingers, sighs, and leaves.
You had intended to let yourself waste away, in all honesty. Only your mother doesn’t let you; she bursts into your room one day, sneers at the miserable sight you make, and insults you to the high heavens. Nothing new, even if her digs hurt, even if she says she isn’t surprised by no one loving you when you are like this, but she forces you to eat some nibbles and then into a shower; she doesn’t care. She is simply tired of having you be an embarrassment and hiding away from the public eye.
Thus, you no longer stay in your room. You don’t bother with jewelry, with heavy gowns or complicated hair styles or even clearing the layer of dust off your furniture, you just leave your room. Thankfully,
Unfortunately, that means passing by the maids and servants. It means passing by them. It means interacting with them again, though no longer initiated by you.
Simon is the second, and less direct. He lingers in places you begin to re-frequent; the library, the gardens, the corridors near your room. He doesn’t speak, just watches from the periphery, eyes heavy and intense. Once, when you brush past him without acknowledging his presence, he mutters something under his breath, his fists clenching at his sides. But he doesn’t try to stop you and you don ask what he said.
He probably didn’t mean you, anyways. You doubt he wants to speak to you, the obstacle.
Johnny falters the most. Though your interactions with him were few, you’d occasionally hear from the servants about how fun he is in general. His smiles, though they’ve never been aimed at you, look quite fake to you, jokes half-hearted and dying on his lips whenever you pass on rare occasions.
One day, he brings a tray of food to your room himself, hoping to coax you into eating with something he’s cooked just for you. You answer the door, see him holding it, and shake your head without a word. Even if it looks delectable, like the dishes John would get.
“Please,” he says, his voice cracking. “I- just try a bit, hen.”
But you close the door before he can say more. He will try again and often, sometimes just leaving the tray, but you never touch it. You’ve lost weight, you know, and the only reason you are getting some nutrients at this point is because you occasionally sneak into the kitchens late at night for tiny snacks to tide you over. If Johnny knows it’s you, he’s never said anything.
Kyle is quieter, yet more present. The guilt eats away at him the most; he knows that his lack of care and respect had a part in the way the rest of the maids and staff treated you. He spends his evenings pacing the hall outside your room, his head bowed, mumbling apologies that you’ll never hear, wondering which one is best.
Once, he catches you in the garden alone, his mouth opening as if to speak, but you pass him without so much as a glance; you already know he won’t care for you have to say or ask for, he’ll just say he is busy, so you just don’t bother.
He stays frozen in place, his hand half-raised, the words stuck in his throat.
The servants, per Kyle and John’s orders, begin to change. Their guilt is slower to manifest, but it’s there and it’s evident in the way they rush to fulfill your needs despite your reluctance. They clean your room with quiet efficiency, no longer treating you like a burden, even though you hadn’t asked it of them. They leave fresh flowers on your desk and vanity, extra blankets on your bed, and freshly pressed gowns in your wardrobe.
You ignore all of it. It’s a waste of everyone’s time snd effort. You aren’t worth it.
Yet despite their heavy guilt, they return to and continue serving you.
But nothing changes the heaviness in your chest, the emptiness that refuses to leave.
One day, closer to the date of the annual winter gala hosted by the emperial family, you step into the dining room unannounced, your presence startling them all. It’s the first time you’ve joined them in weeks. You move slowly, your posture rigid and tired, your expression unreadable.
“Duchess,” John starts, his voice uncertain, rising from his seat.
“…John,” You sit without meeting his eyes, your movements slow and deliberate. The table is silent, the tension suffocating as John, Simon, and Kyle exchange uncertain glances.
John clears his throat. “It’s good to see you, wife.”
You don’t respond.
The meal is awkward, stilted, but it’s necessary for you; you need to get reused to John for your eventual reappearance in high society. Johnny offers you dishes with a hesitant, hopeful look in his eyes, and Kyle pours your wine with an unsteady grip. John and Simon try to start a conversation, but their words falter and fade when you don’t reply.
Still, they try. Over the following weeks, their efforts grow.
John begins carving out time to spend with you, awkwardly hovering near your door, waiting for even a crumb of acknowledgment. He starts leaving small notes for you- apologies and quiet promises to be better. They pile up on your desk, untouched but not thrown away. You want to believe, but you feel jaded and tired.
Simon offers you quiet companionship, instead. Standing at your side in the garden or library, saying nothing but ensuring you’re not alone. He speaks softly when he does talk, a one-sided conversation with only the occasional hum or noise from you, but he’s undeterred.
Johnny keeps cooking for you, leaving trays of food outside your door with little notes attached: Eat a bit, bonnie. Just for me. You don’t eat much, still have very little appetite, but you do start taking bites here and there, and it’s enough to keep him trying.
Kyle offers small acts of service- holding doors open for you, keeping anything you might need available at hanf, ensuring your rooms are kept warm and comfortable. His words are rare, but his actions speak of endless guilt and the quiet hope that he can earn even a sliver of forgiveness.
The maids and butlers follow suit, their movements quieter, their service more thoughtful. They stop muttering, their eyes full of remorse whenever they see you. They bow in respect, and no longer treat you as if you aren’t a part of the duchy.
But you keep them all at arm’s length. Their guilt is evident, their efforts genuine, but the wounds they’ve left on your heart are deep. Forgiveness, if it ever comes, will not be easily earned. For now, you let them try, watching their clumsy attempts with a mixture of numbness and quiet satisfaction (that you do feel guilty over, but truly can’t help).
Several weeks before the gala, John comes to your office. He sits down, and waits until you are finished with your paperwork before he speaks. You are in a beautiful dress- Simon’s gift- and your hair is in a delicate style, done by your maids. You look pretty. You feel nice, even if the numbness remains. These days, it’s less.
“Duchess, I was thinking,” he began, voice soft and patient. “it might do you some good to get away for a while. A change of scenery.”
You turned to look at him, the suggestion pulling you from your numb reverie. His blue eyes searched yours, and for once, there was no coldness, no distance. “Somewhere quiet,” he continued, “where you can rest… away from all of this.”
The idea of leaving the suffocating walls of the manor, and the heavy tension of the duchy was tempting. And yet, you hesitated, unsure if you could trust the gesture or if it was just another attempt to smooth over appearances.
“I’ll take care of everything,” he added quickly, as if sensing your doubt. “You won’t have to worry about a thing. You can choose who you’d like to go with, or even if you want to go alone. It’s entirely up to you, Duchess.”
Johnny and Kyle appeared in the doorway then, Kyle holding a tray with a steaming cup of tea, Johnny with a small, hopeful smile and a plate of your favorite biscuits. Even Simon lingered near the threshold, his gaze steady but tinged with something softer than usual.
They were all waiting for your answer, their expressions almost pleading. You could feel the weight of their guilt and the sincerity of their offer. It wasn’t much- not enough to erase everything that had passed- but it was something. A step forward.
“…I’ll think about it.” you said at last, your voice quiet but firm. And for the first time in a long while, you saw a flicker of relief in their eyes.
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