#also aiden miserable moment

[sleep-can-wait]

Okay, so I made a poll on whether Aiden Acharya was a book bf and this is because see him getting a lot of hate. And I have no idea why????? There's even a video (albeit a small mention) calling him annoying???? Also I see him tend to get antagonized in a bunch of fics.

There are only a few reasons I could think of as to why and those do not really make sense in my opinion:

He was distant with Aru of CoG - okay but dude literally has so much trauma when it comes to love. His parents got divorced because of it and his father hurt his mother sm because of it. Now obviously when he used the key in ToW he realised he was in love with her. And no duh he'd want to put some distance between them so that she wouldn't hurt him because of it AND HE WOULDN'T HURT HER

The Kara shenanigans - please Aiden was being polite he literally acted the same as with Mini and Brynne, like Kara was feeling left out, that much was obvious, so Wifey was the better man and helped her feel included. BECAUSE HE IS NICE. The "romance" between them was all Kara's delusions and Aru's unreliable narrating for fucks sake she once thought Brynne and Aiden once had feelings for each other because she always thinks lowly of her.

The time skip - HE WAS JUST TOLD HE WAS GOING TO DIE BECAUSE OF ARU HE IS LITERALLY ONLY 15/16 A MERE FUCKING CHILD YOU THINK HE'S JUST GONNA LA DEE DA HIS WAY THROUGH LIFE AND PRETEND NOTHING IS WRONG????? THAT IS SO FUCKED UP FOR HIS MENTALITY OF COURSE HE WOULD TRY TO AVOID HIS FATE ISTFG-

The rejection at the start of NoI - honestly pretty sure he just word-vomited like Aru in EoT he didn't get to complete what he was saying so he couldn't explain himself properly and after he kissed Aru, he probably realized his fate was sealed and he was on the verge of dying, yes he'd do everything he could to avoid it even if it means lying and taking back everything because he does not want to die has anyone realized how scary dying is??? Like he's probably terrified because god fucking dammit he's gonna die he does not want his life to end he doesn't want to leave his friends or family. It's a kids book so it's not really shown properly how awful and miserable and so fucking scary it is to be told: "you're gonna die."

The rest of NoI - literally the exact same reasoning any moment in this quest he will stop breathing and no one knows Aiden's POV, so he was probably having so many panic attacks and crying and screaming himself hoarse because he really, really doesn't want to die he doesn't want to abandon his mom, being the person Malini found worth living for. He didn't want to leave Rudy, his blood family that didn't abandon him. He didn't want to say good bye to Brynne, his best friend, nor to the other Potatoes. He didn't want to spend less than 9 days with Aru before seeing her for the last time.

I'm probably gonna get so much hate for this but I'm tired of seeing how badly Aiden is treated and I adore him and honestly he was absolutely in the right to cut off Aru, though I'm not saying it was the right thing to do, but he was allowed to do it.

Because. He. Does. Not. Want. His. Heart. Broken.

He. Did. Not. Want. To. Die.

[accirax]

initial thoughts on DCAS episode 12

on another episode of "making myself sad about Grett," we learn that Grett has learned to interpret any general statement as an attack on her appearance/person. fuck you, Yul. and also Grett's family.

so true Connor

heheheh, i called that it would be to/at alternate Gabby >:)

oh nice, Connor is one of those cool CEOs that takes pay cuts in order to give his employees higher wages--

WHAT

why are you running like that you fucking nerd (/aff). i don't even have to specify who because it's just that apparently bizarre.

totally makes sense that Alec is fine with Riya "winning immunity" because she'll just give it back to him. he's got his head in the game as always.

i always love to see the villains scheming, but this may actually make more sense for Riya than her current real plan. Alec has been proving time and time again that he's good at, like... everything. everyone should be really worried about him winning if he makes it to the end. i don't know if Riya could beat Ally either (because i don't know what the challenge will be), but she should be thinking about taking Alec out before the endgame. although, she does have to worry about taking him out in a way that won't leave a grudge, given that Alec has proven that he won't root for a former ally just to be petty.

Usain Bolt is now canon to the DCU. no, not that one.

wow, Gabby really is Tumblr Girl! (/j)

at first i thought Alec might have been buttering Connor up in this scene in the hopes that Connor would simply give him the immunity if Connor won it. it's true that Connor probably would have given it to one of the heroes, though, just for strategy reasons. still, this is not helping any hopes Alec has of rekindling a friendship with Connor.

i do NOT trust food made by Marcus and Nina.

just admit that you're besties, you tsundere fool.

i'm not trying to argue that Derek is the greatest dude on the planet or anything, but, notably, i feel like this is one of the only times we've seen him look genuinely sad.

this is a funny speech conclusion from the millionaire guy.

i guess??? this is the reason???? why they were targeting Gabby?????? i'm still confused, honestly. can we take this as a soft confirmation that Tom and Aiden never believed in that idol Gabby lied about having?

you do not understand how worried i was for the sake of my power rankings at this moment.

yay, we finally get to learn what the updated tiebreaker policy is! looks like it will be going to a head-to-head challenge instead of doing a Survivor-style revote -> rocks. Still can't believe that we had a tiebreaker and Yul didn't lose it, though.

KING BEHAVIOR!! god, i wish the DC winner was determined by jury vote. Alec has absolutely played the game most deserving of winning thus far. then again, if there was a jury vote at the end, people probably would have started gunning to take him out already. so, maybe i should be grateful.

i'm glad that these two have made up, both because Gabby needs and deserves more friends than just Ellie in her life, and because it shows how Gabby has grown as a person. instead of just wanting to get revenge on those who have personally wronged her, she wants to use her passionate heart to target those who are making others' lives miserable.

about time!

"if i can't spend time with my gay crush, you can't either!"

i still don't think i've actually processed that Tom won't be in the next episode. like, damn. it was a good choice, though. if they were going to send a hero home, i'm much happier to see one part of the love triangle get axed than have Ally randomly go out.

i assumed something like this would happen, but i was not expecting them to actually visibly kiss. yay for the... krisrek shippers? if they exist?

poor guy :/

another episode that i'm pleased with! ... but how the hell did Yul not go home?! it's got to happen next week, right? like, i know that Alec is a genius or whatever, but it's not like the entire season can go his way. the villains will have to fracture someday. until then, though, uh, #villainsweep. still rooting for Alec, even if i think Jake will win. see you next week!

[eryanlainfa]

In a modern au like the college one, how would Aiden get injured? Would they still go through a blizzard, or would something else happen, do you think?

It would depend on what I want to do with the story and whatever I think is more interesting!

In itself the blizzard isn't the important part, so anything goes as long as Aiden ends up losing a limb. (An important part to consider is how I want the incident to impact the characters, beside the obvious physical loss. But since I don't really have a clear idea at the moment that's complicated)

... after talking, I think Aiden wouldn't go through a blizzard and get hurt enough to the point of losing a leg in those modern aus. I feel like it just doesn't work well with the setting in my head. So gotta find something else!

I'm sorry my brain isn't working much rn and I am absolutely no medical expert so the only thing I can think of is a car crash 😭 its cliche but it works fine

I think it'd happen just at the start of the school year, to explain why they missed classes suddenly. Maybe it was a heavy rainy day, Aiden was running back home when a nearby car went hydroplanning and lost control, resulting in the crash. Aiden was "lucky" to have only their legs really damaged but one was unsaveable and amputation was the best solution. Other leg got better after some time with a cast or something. I think it would also explain Aiden being obsessed with their grades, it's a way to avoid thinking about their loss.

If you want to make Varian feel guilty about the whole thing maybe it was his idea to run under the rain instead of waiting and he was present at the moment of the incident- I like to make them miserable :)

[aidenlyons]

*Time Skip*

Of all the holidays this year:

Harvestfest - A feast and, of course, Football.

Winterfest - Small gifts, a lonely house as people went home to their families.

New Year's - Epic house party.

The one that Aiden has been dreading is... Love Day.

(WARNING: NSFW images below!!)

A few clients gave him cards. Aiden isn't sure why he kept them. It's been a miserable day and Kory organized some sort of party downstairs. He'll hate himself tomorrow but for the first time he tries to numb his sadness with drink.

Elias comes up from the party to find Aiden, slightly drunk and miserable, wallowing in bed. He's not exactly sober himself, worried about his friend.

E: Hey buddy. Didn't see you downstairs.

A: Didn't want to. Too many happy couples.

E: Yeah? Thought you had a date last week?

A: Ugh. No second date. It was awful. It's always awful, Eli.

E: M'sorry, man. Really thought this one'd be different. You said he was nice.

A: He was. S'pose he could be a friend. But not.. he wasn't.. There was no chemistry.

A: You don't have trouble.

E: I struggle.

A: With what?

E: Dunno. That I might want somethin' I didn't know I wanted.

hat gets Aiden's attention. He knows he's a little drunk but now he's confused.

A: Wait.. what d'you mean?

E: Think.. I don't know. Talking to you, and.. I'm around a lot of guys. Here, in the locker room. I'm not bein' creepy! Thinking recently that.. some are kinda cute.

Aiden huffs a soft laugh and looks at Elias in confusion.

A: Are you.. coming out to me, right now?

This is the most bazaar Love Day he's ever lived through, he thinks. But he's also really proud of Elias. It's hard to accept thoughts that change how you see yourself.

E: I.. don't know? But.. I've been getting more curious, lately.

A: About what?

E: Everything? I mean.. A hug's a hug, they're all nice. But would kissing a guy feel the same as a girl? That's wierd, huh?

A: Nah. Think it's normal. But I dunno. Never kissed a girl.

Elias gets himself off the floor now that Aiden is sitting up, considering that.

E: It's.. nice. Girls are all just.. sorta soft. A lot of lipstick taste gross though. Like wax.

Aiden snorts a laugh, then sobers, considering that.

A: Sounds like kissing is the same.

Aiden considers. He's nervous, drunk, but hopeful. Elias is handsome, he's a friend, maybe he's the solution to why it doesn't seem to work with anyone since... Jake.

A: Well.. you wanna try? You can kiss me, if you want.

Elias immediately looks at Aiden's mouth.

E: Can I?

A: Didn't I just-? Yeah. I'd like it too.

Elias leans in and touches Aiden's jaw. He can't say he hasn't thought about it, especially with how close they've gotten this year. Who better to experiment with than a friend?

E: Alright.

One soft kiss turns into two, turns into a slightly sloppy makeout session. Eli's never been with a guy, so Aiden knows he's going to have to take lead here. It's not what he's used to, but he remembers he did it before, what feels like a lifetime ago.

Aiden nudges Elias until he lays back and then starts to crawl over him after their kisses grow heated and hands start wandering. They're both breathless.

A: Is this okay?

He has enough presence of mind to check in.

E: Yeah. Yes. Come here.

For a moment Aiden has a strong sense of deja vou and has to shake his head a little.

E: You okay?

A: Mhm. Yeah. Yeah, I'm good.

Rather than think, he attempts to shut up his brain by resuming their kissing and enjoying Elias' curious, wandering hands.

Elias thankfully is eager, and a quick learner. Aiden is sober enough to make sure they'll both enjoy this.

(EDIT: These images have been altered from original to be less NSFW)

It's good. It's damn good. Elias clearly has some skill and he's attentive. He may never have done this before but he's a quick study. It's been months since Aiden felt this good.

Afterward, there's tipsy cuddling. Elias knows he's a fan of cuddling in general, has heard it enough. He pays attention.

A: Oof, what are you doing? You're heavy.

Aiden giggles, relaxed and still high off those happy hormones.

E: That was amazing.

E: Hmm. Thank you.

A: Isn't that my line?

E: Nope. You're beautiful, know that?

A: You're drunk. We're both drunk. *giggles* We need sleep.

E: Can I stay?

A: Yeah. I'm not going to suffer alone in the morning.

[ahungeringknife]

365: January 21

Some old brain rot OCs. Not in their canon but I like making Aiden a miserable little shit when I can because he's such a smooth operator normally. Dude needs to get knocked off his high horse sometimes

--

It’d been a storm last night. Meant all sorts of stuff washed up on the shore. Eva was hopeful for some pretty shells or maybe some cool driftwood she could add to her snake’s terrarium. Bingo Bongos always loved when she changed the scaping in his tank. Or maybe some sea glass. The beach wasn’t known for sea glass but she’d found it a few times. She might get lucky.

Instead as she moved around some big rocks just within the tidal zone she saw a miracle. At the very least a fantasy.

It was a mermaid.

She stood there with her net bag of pretty shells and rocks and didn’t know what to do. Did she scream? Did she go run and get her mom and brother? They wouldn’t believe her. Her mom said she read too many fantasy books. What else was she supposed to do at school? Listen to the teacher? Unlikely.

Then she really saw the mermaid. It was tangled in a discarded fishing net and had a bunch of scrapes and bruises from rocks. It’d have to have been tossed around in the storm last night. Was it even alive? It was just laying there on the sand on its back, eyes closed.

Carefully she pulled a shell out of her bag and tossed it at the mermaid. Her heart jumped when it landed on its chest and it batted it away. She got closer but stayed out of reaching or thrashing range. “H-hello?” she asked.

She started when the mermaid’s eyes opened and their eyes were the color of the Caribbean sea. “Hooman,” it said and looked away from her like it was annoyed.

“Are you hurt? Do you need help?” she asked it. Him? Her? They didn’t have any boobs so she assumed it was a male. It was pretty small too. The human-ish torso was only a bit bigger than Eva herself but the tail was long and eel-like. He didn’t answer her. “Can you not get out of that net?” He didn’t look at her and after a moment gave the smallest shake of his head. “My brother has a fishing knife, I’ll be right back,” Eva said and ran off.

She ran back to where her mom and brother were. Nick was fishing off the rocky outcrop and her mom was sitting on a beach chair under and umbrella reading some book. She stole away to her brother’s tackle box sitting on the beach and fished out the knife he usually used to gut the fish before going on. She kept behind her mom the entire time and once she had it raced back to where she’d found the mermaid boy in the tidal rocks.

Eva was half sure he going to be gone by the time she got back but he was still there, tangled in the nets. “I’m back. I have a knife,” she said, huffing and puffing from running back and forth. The mermaid opened his eyes and pushed himself up some to look at her. She unsheathed the knife and started cutting the net wrapped around his long eel tail that had it all curled up and unusable. It was also tangled around one of his wrists and the skin was red and blistered as she cut that away too.

It took a little bit but she did untangle him from the fishing net. She smiled widely at him. “There you go. You’re free. Can you swim?” He nodded slowly. She looked at the low tide fifteen or so feet away. It was nothing to walk but to drag yourself that way. “Let me help you,” she offered him her hands. “To get back to the sea.”

“Ha’ping meh,” he said, the way he said the words was funny but surprisingly understandable. “Whay?”

“My mom always told me to help people when they’re in trouble. And you were in trouble.”

He nodded and took grabbed her wrists. She was not very strong but she did drag him towards the shore. He used his tail to give a bit of a push and she dragged him into the chilly water. Once he had a few inches of water under his body he was able to thrash his tail and propel himself forward. Eva held up her hands to avoid getting splashed too much. When she lowered her hands the mermaid was gone. “You’re welcome,” she said softly to the sea before going back to find shells and pretty rocks. She’d tell Nick about the lost net later. They’d take it to the dump on their way home.

[overnightheartbeats]

He heard Addison's tone, and was not too surprised by the comment. Irvin was semi-familiar with her family, being Aiden's friend and all. Though, his curiosity towards her family and their dynamics increased and were now coupled with the fact that his friend was about to marry his only sister. He did know she was not close with the other siblings, evidenced by her physical distance from them. But, also from any time he asked Aiden about her. Odd attempts to get to know the woman he's been married to for the last five years. "Well, I won't judge if you cry or not. I know all about complicated parental relationships. If there's anything I should know before we see your entire family at the wedding, well - you let me know."

Well, at least he could make her laugh. That was a win for Irvin. Their time together would not be all that miserable. "Okay, true true. I hate to break it to you, but no I don't have a secret bachelorette party planned on the way back. But, I mean, if you really wanted to?" He trailed off knowing that now they were edging on ridiculous and delusional. Something scandalous as a bachelorette party in Vegas would not fly, or who knows? He'd been playfully researching one for his sister, something fun but secret so there were no scandals or rumors. "You could join Pheebs' party, I'm sure she wouldn't mind." Irvin nodded as she agreed to let him stay the night. It was easier to stay than to make the long drive back into the town for the hotel that was booked. "Thanks, appreciate avoiding the drive back to town, especially if we have this long conversation pending."

One more thing? Irvin braced himself for impact. What was she gong to hit him with? "Okay what is it?" Whatever it was, Addison seemed pretty determined to make her point. Oh. There it was. His brows furrowed, slightly confused. A dog? It had seemed so serious just moments ago that the dog request seemed random. "Uh, no untreated allergies here. I wouldn't mind if you bring him along, seems like a shitty thing - to ask you to leave your dog behind. Bailey? How'd she get her name?"

With a swift movement, he pulled his phone out and sent a quick text to the driver, requesting that his luggage was unloaded and updated that they’d be staying tonight. “Agree. It’ll be best for us to have this all sorted out if before we return. If we return being on the same page, it’ll probably be better received. We can spend the day tomorrow doing that, take the last flight back to the US. As far as housing goes, my place does have extra rooms, but I suppose we can look for something else if it’s not to your liking.” He hadn’t really considered, the changes that he’d be making in his life now.

The next morning was quiet, and looking out to the bright area, he could see why this was a preferred spot of hers. Quiet, calm, and away from the chaos. And, now here he was dragging her away from all of it. Not that he wanted to, but duty called and he suspected Addison knew that too. After a quick shower, he made his way downstairs to find breakfast.

“Morning, how’d you sleep?”

Irvin would probably be surprised to know how much one of his best friends hated his wife. Cause Addison was pretty sure she was on top of his brother's enemy's list. That would be a tough pill to swallow considering her brother was going to be married to his sister soon. The invitation would never have come if her brother was going to marry anyone else. She knew that without needing to ask. She and Aiden had no love lost for each other and that was something Addison had long since made peace with. There was a time where she would have gone out of her way to have a relationship with both siblings - Aiden and Sasha - but that was long gone.

Technically the apartment in London was theirs because she had bought it once she was married but she wasn't going to go over any estate details with him. Addison understood though that she probably didn't have time to even take a vacation where she didn't have to act as Irvin's trophy wife anymore. Probably their next summers would be more Martha's Vineyard and the Hamptons than the south of France. A shame and probably European summers were one of the things she was going to miss the most. It was almost funny that Irvin considered that they could have "thought it out more." As if they had a choice, as if she had a choice. In five years she hadn't made a single decision in that entire arregement except to live their life apart for as long as she could. Until today, her luck had clearly run out.

"I'm not going to cry at night over the relationship we don't have, that's for sure." She shrugged. Although she was mature enough to admit that she had serious daddy issues, Addison had been through enough therapy to know that any relationship with her father was a lost cause. Almost as much as any relationship with Aiden was. She wasn't going to put any more effort into lost causes.

She let out a laugh at his joke. “One last hurrah would be a bachelorette party in Vegas, not a flight, but since we’ve been married for five years I think that’s out of the question.” Addison scoffed. “You can stay here tonight and we can come back together tomorrow, it’s best to get this over with anyway.” If she didn’t get back with Irvin, Addison was sure she was going to have her father on her doorstep in less than 48 hours. She’d rather skip that conversation and any interaction with him if she was being honest.

“Mhm, there’s one more thing.” She crossed her arms over her chest ready to fight if she had to “I have a dog and unless you have untreated allergies, Bailey’s coming with me.” It was almost funny that that was the hill she decided to die on. Unless he was allergic or had a major phobia of dogs, Bailey was going with her wherever they were going to live from now on "I can't just leave her here if I don't know when I'll be back."

Her job. Addison was going to have to quit her job and wasn't sure even sure she was going to have time to work full time if they both had to make this marriage work and look good on the outside. "We're going to have to sit down and talk about how we're going to make this all work for us while we make it work for the outside." They were both going to have to come to a living arrangement so they wouldn't lose their minds. They didn't even know each other well enough. Addison wouldn't even call Irvin a friend. Plus at some point they were both going to have to talk about how the kids thing was going to work, literally how they were going to conceive them because at that point they were closer to artificial insemination than anything else.

[acraftedmistake]

A Person Who Has Never Played MCSM Writes A Story About MCSM Chp. 21

“They hate me.” Aiden mumbled.

“Don’t say that.” Olivia said. Aiden just stared into his cup.

Ever since Jess and the others left, all he’s done is sit at the bar table with his head low.

Aiden’s face scrunched, “What am I supposed to say then? That everything’s fine? We’re just gonna forgive and forget, and be all buddy buddy again? I messed up. They’re mad. And I can’t do anything about it.”

“Feeling sorry for yourself isn’t going to make things get any better.” Olivia frowned. Aiden stayed quiet.

Olivia stared at him for a moment before taking a deep breath. Come on, you’ve been in this situation before–well–not exactly like this, but you know how he’s feeling. What would Jess say? How would you reassure yourself? How would you push yourself through this?

“Well, you love them, don’t you?” Olivia said. Aiden glanced up from his cup.

“They’re your friends. They’re not going to hate you, but you said it yourself, you messed up. You can’t change what’s happened so you… You need to be there for them now.”

Aiden finally took a sip of his coffee. It was cold.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right.” He mumbled. He rested his head on his hand, gently swirling his coffee, “I just don’t wanna lose ‘em too.”

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Jesse kicked at a rock as he followed Cecil through the field of grass. He kept his hands in his pockets as he listened to bits and pieces of blondie’s rants.

“Outrageous… I cannot believe…! I can do it myself…!”  

Since the moment they left the ravine, Cecil’s been going off. It’s been nothing but complaining, readjusting that stupid, brown bag over his shoulder, then more complaining.

Jesse could barely stand being in the same room as Cecil, but having to travel with him? Putting up with his constant glares, his grating voice, and his touchy behavior? Jesse would rather be locked in the Dark Room again than this. At least when he and Cecil were in the shrine together, the Visions would keep Cecil busy, or Jesse could distract himself with his sword and journal. What did he have out here? Twigs? Grass? Delightful.

Jesse did his best to block out Cecil’s whines and turned away, gazing over the forests and hills in the distance, the cracks and debris along the ground, and Obsidian Town–which they were pretty far from. It all looked so miserable.

There used to be buildings here. They were small and scattered around, but there was at least something to fill this dull space. Little stores, a couple of homes bunched together, little rest stops that sat by the edges of ravines that’d give you a nice but frightening view of what’s below… There used to be tons of bridges that stretched across the many ravines as well. Honestly, Jesse could never stand those bridges and rest stops, he was always afraid he’d fall over the edge. He’d much rather walk around the cracks, even if it took hours.

Jesse looked down. The ground below him was blackened. Scorched. There were a ton of these burnt patches scattered throughout the field and paths. Before, there used to be grass, flowers, and crops, but now there’s nothing. Absolutely nothing.

The Lava Monster had destroyed just about everything that stood in its path. Now all that remained were piles of junk. Scraps. Wastes of space.

Jesse had vague memories of rumors spreading. Rumors that mayors and other city leaders wanted to restore what the monster had destroyed. Rebuild those homes, plant new crops, everyone was so excited. And then nothing ever happened. It’s still empty. Still destroyed.

No one’s touched that hole the monster came out of either. Everyone was thinking that a new town would be built within the crack, it’s been done before, but no. The hole just sits there.

Jesse scoffed to himself. ‘Restore what was destroyed’, yeah, how’s that coming along?

Jesse passed by a couple of destroyed lampposts. Broken wood jutted out from where the old bases once were, while shards of glass stuck out from the dirt. It’d be a bit funny if Cecil stepped on one of those shards. It’d make this evening just a bit better.

Jesse kept eyeing the fallen lamps. Honestly, out of everything that got crushed and burnt down… He missed the lights the most.

There used to be hundreds of lanterns that would surround the forests and aligned the paths whenever he used to travel. It actually used to be his favorite part of traveling, seeing all the lights. It was like the fields had been decorated with stars.

Most of them are gone now. Just like everything else. It’s depressing without them.

Jesse faced forward and noticed that Cecil was waiting for him up ahead, arms folded with a small scowl on his face.

Did they reach the Shrine of Eyes already?

You’d think that—for one of the few shrines on the surface–it’d be easier to spot, but the Shrine of Eyes had been consumed by the surrounding forest over the years. If it weren’t for the moonlight hitting what was left of the shattered, red windows, it would’ve been easy to miss this place.

“Are you going to be taking all day?” Cecil said. Jesse rolled his eyes.

“This isn’t my idea of fun either, you know.” Jesse said as he stepped over the roots and rubble below him.

Time hasn’t been kind to this shrine.

The overhang it once had has collapsed, a good portion of it’s columns were taken over by vines, piles of broken stone laid beside the place, and giant cracks stretched across its walls. Many plants from the forest–roots, vines, and weeds–have wrapped themselves around the outside; some have managed to squeeze their way into the holes and cracks.

This was one of the few shrines Jesse recalled that had a second floor–well all the shrines he had been to in the past had a second room–but they were always built into the ground, like a basement, not placed on top of a shrine. Jesse remembered the Visions mentioning their shrine’s lower level before, but he’s never been allowed inside. The second floor here was a tinier room–shaped more like a dome–and there wasn’t much left of it now. Half of it has been reduced to debris, while the other half has been consumed by ivy. You could still see the bits of the purple and red windows from here.

The Shrine was exactly how Jesse remembered it. Hardly anything has changed since he last visited. In fact, the last time he was here was when… When he was looking for Lukas.

A loud bang caught Jesse’s attention. He whipped his head around to see Cecil had torn open the front door. It was barely hanging by its hinges.

“Let’s get this over with.” Cecil sneered, wiping off his hands and stepping through.

Jesse followed behind, a familiar discomfort filling him.

Just find the portal and get out. It won’t take that long. It’ll be fi–

Jesse ran right into Cecil. Cecil looked at him with repulsion before pushing Jesse away.

“Pay attention!” Cecil hissed. Jesse cringed and immediately tore the hand off of him.

“Not my fault you weren’t moving.” Jesse shot back. He hated that. He could still feel Cecil’s hand on him. His fingers. He hated that.

Cecil huffed and turned away to search the old nave of this shrine. Jesse scratched at his shirt, nails digging into his skin, hoping the sensation would go away soon.

Jesse wanted to keep his distance from Cecil. He really wanted to. He’s seen how Cecil treats other members. He’s seen how Cecil holds onto them. How he wraps his arms around them, holds their hands, pulls them just a bit closer. He’s seen the way Cecil looks at the members with that fond look in his eyes. That subtle yet sinister smile on his face whenever the members would lean into him–and Jesse swears there’s been times where Cecil would smell the hairs of the members. Just thinking about it made Jesse shudder.

Jesse doesn’t care if Cecil hates him. If it meant that Cecil would keep his hands off of him, he'll take it. The Visions grabbing onto him? He can handle it. It’s short. But Cecil? No. Never.

Jesse leaned against one of the many, thick, dark gray columns around the nave. The cold stone against this skin felt wonderful. Despite the years of quakes this place has been through, the columns inside still aligned the walls, still holding the ceiling up. Their shrine back at the ravine had similar columns, though instead of faded carvings and torn banners, their decorations were newer. Nicer.

Jesse scanned the nave as Cecil walked around. The broken, old chairs were still arranged in that large circle. Stone bricks were still covered in moss and roots. The battered, torn rug was still–that was weird. The rug was missing. There used to be a rug in the center of the nave. Jesse stared at the reddish brown stain in the center of the room.

“Gross! What is that?” Olivia’s voice rang through from years ago when she lifted up that old rug.

“Redstone dust? Doesn’t that, like… Change color over time?” Jesse responded.

“Oh no, that’s gotta be blood.” Cassie said.

Olivia rolled her eyes, “Oh, please. It… Probably isn’t.”

“Awh, c’mon. You don’t think the evil, spooky cult didn’t make a couple of sacrifices?” Cassie wriggled her fingers, smirking.

“Knock it off, you’re scaring Jesse!”

Jesse jumped, “Hey!”

Cecil stepped over the stain and into Jesse’s view. Jesse frowned and looked away.

He sighed, breathing in that strange, sweet scent. It was the smell that reminded him of the candied berries Gill would use for his baking. The smell that’d always turn bitter after another whiff and make your nose scrunch. The smell that was always prevalent whenever the Visions would light a new torch, or whenever Olivia worked on her contraptions.

“What’s with the face?” Olivia’s voice echoed through his ears.

“No, nothing. Just smells terrible.” Jesse remembered replying. He closed his eyes, and for a moment, he was sitting beside Olivia. She placed a redstone torch on her desk.

He remembered the little smile she wore as she raised her brows, “You’ll get used to it. Think you could hand me that dispenser?”  

Jesse blinked. The familiar warmth that filled him faded away.

Why does he feel so bad? That’s his friend. These were good memories.

Jesse slowly spun in place, trying to keep his mind occupied while Cecil took his precious time.

This was just the same old shrine. Same old nave. Old, worn down, ruined. The only interesting thing here was the shape of the nave. It was rounder, circular. Quite different from all the shrines Jesse had seen before, which were always more rectangular. Back when he and his friends explor–

No. No. No.

Jesse’s eyes flickered back to Cecil. Jesse tapped his foot. Hurry up. Hurry up.

Jesse’s eyes darted about. This place was bare. Empty. The decorations it once had have fallen apart. It didn’t have any flowers hanging from support beams that stretched across the ceiling–this place didn’t even have beams across the ceiling like the ravine’s shrine. No hanging decor or small banners, just the big, ruined ones. It didn’t have that empty fountain behind the stage, there was only the faded carving of the Hero’s face–which Cecil was blocking the view of. Cool. Fantastic. It’s not that Jesse wanted to see it or anything, he just hated seeing Cecil.

This was one of the few depictions of the Hero where you actually saw his face, and even then, it was still so vague. It didn’t help that the moss and dirt that filled the carved lines made the face even harder to read.

A memory from a few years ago rose into Jesse’s mind. A memory where he, Lukas, and the others traveled through the bottom of a deep ravine. Every inch of its walls were covered with Awakening symbols.

Lukas was writing in his journal as he walked, thinking out loud about the different interpretation while Jesse threw in his comments. The thought of Lukas’ voice, the curious yet ever so slightly cautioned tone made Jesse’s heart beat faster. More memories flashed in his mind. Lukas’ smile. His laugh. His compassion. The caring look in his eyes when he knew Jesse was upset. The way Lukas and Aiden would always–

Stop it. Stop thinking about them.

You’re going to be getting Lukas back soon, so stop feeling like this. Stop feeling so miserable.

Cecil hurry up. Hurry up. I don’t want to be here anymore.

Jesse watched as Cecil finally took off his bag and dug out an unlit torch.

He pressed his lips together as Cecil struck the torch against the wall. Sparks flew, but no flame.

Cecil did it again. Nothing.

Jesse wanted to take it.

He wanted to take that torch.

He wanted to tear it out of Cecil’s hands and make that damn fire. He wanted to burn Cecil. He wanted to melt his disgusting face off. He wanted to burn himself. He wanted to burn this nave down. No. No, not really. No. He didn’t want to. Really. He didn’t. He shouldn’t be thinking this. The Visions wouldn’t forgive him. Those thoughts were wrong, but–

Cecil struck the torch thrice. Finally, fire.

Jesse exhaled. A part of him felt oddly relieved.

Cecil held the torch high as he started walking towards a dark doorway on the left--

“That door doesn’t lead anywhere.” Jesse blurted out. Cecil stopped and scowled.

“And how would you know? The Visions sent us to look for the portal, so we should look anywhere possible, even if--”

“Yeah, well I’ve been here before, and that door leads to nowhere.” Jesse made his way to the door on the right of the stage, “So if you wanna get this thing done and over with, we’re gonna go through this door.”

Before Jesse could grab hold of the doorknob, Cecil shoved him aside.

“I’ll take the lead, thank you.”

Jesse bit his tongue. The less they fight, the sooner they’re out of here.

“I would like to get my job done in an organized, timely manner, and having you wanting to rush through everything is just a recipe for disaster.” Cecil said as the two went into the hallway.  

Jesse couldn’t help but mutter to himself, “Jeez, I thought you’d be happier.”

“Hm? Would you like to speak up, Jesse?” Cecil said in that oh-so-horrible condescending voice of his.

“We’re getting that old Sense back, aren’t we? That guy you and the Visions talk about? I thought you LOVED him.” Jesse shoved his hands back into his pockets, “I just thought you’d be happier getting him back.”

Cecil gripped the torch harder and forced on a smile, “Yes, well you see–and I mean this from the bottom of my heart–I would be feeling much better if you were to dropped dead right now.” Cecil leaned in, “Or, even if you were a little more cooperative, just a little more tolerable, I’d be a little more happy than I am right now.”

Jesse had to step back. Cecil was getting a little too close.

Cecil stuck his nose up and marched ahead, “But no, I have to be stuck babysitting a stupid, repulsive little–” Cecil kept ranting to himself. He grumbled about not knowing what Brenner was thinking. How he was fully capable of doing this task by himself. How much of a “determined” and “diligent” Sense he was without someone weighing him down.

Jesse just rolled his eyes. Sure. HE was the bad guy. He was the ‘uncooperative’ one for following orders, something that Cecil just looooves to do. Jesse’s the bad guy for wanting to find the portal. For wanting his friends back. For wanting to bring EVERYONE back, even that charred up old Sense that Cecil admires so much.

Whatever. It was impossible to please Cecil.

Jesse stopped to look at each room they passed to see if any of them had the portal inside. Even if the rooms were obviously ruined, filled with rubble, or blocked off entirely, Jesse wanted to look at something–ANYTHING besides Cecil.

Jesse hated that his eyes were constantly drawn back to Cecil. His red cloak and yellow shirt were the only vibrant things in this entire shrine, and watching them move. Watching Cecil’s body–Jesse’s mind would flash to–

Jesse shook his head.

He doesn’t want to think about that.

There’s got to be something else that–

An old stairway caught Jesse’s attention.

It was busted. Falling apart. It looked like it was moments away from collapsing, but at the top, Jesse swore he saw a glimmer of light.

“Hey, why don’t we check up there?” Jesse tilted his head towards the stairs.

Cecil didn’t even glance in his direction, “We will not be wasting our time with your ridiculous ideas. Let’s go.”

Jesse furrowed his brow, “But the portal could be up there.”

Cecil stopped and let out a frustrated sigh, “I understand you’ve been to this shrine before…” Cecil started in that patronizing tone, “So I hope you also understand that nobody would be stupid enough to build something as valuable as a portal on a shrine’s upper floor. The ceiling could collapse, the floors could cave in, there’d be hundreds of ways for the portal to get destroyed. If you’re going to make suggestions, I’d advise you to actually think before you speak. Now let’s go.”

Jesse didn’t budge. His hands curled to fists.

“You’re not even giving it a chance.” Jesse spoke through his teeth.

Cecil walked ahead, ignoring Jesse. Ignoring every single room he passed.

Forget him.

Jesse didn’t need blondie breathing down his neck anyways.

Jesse carefully placed his foot on the first step, making sure the old wood wouldn’t snap under his weight, before taking his next step–

“Jesse!” He heard Cecil snap, “Jesse, come back this instant!”

It was Jesse’s turn to ignore him. He kept a tight grip on the railing, avoiding the holes and debris in his path as he kept his eyes on that small glimmer–when suddenly a hand grabbed onto his ankle and yanked him down. Jesse hit his chin against a rock and was dragged across the floor.

Jesse cussed to himself. He rubbed his chin to make sure there was no blood then kicked at Cecil’s hand, making him let go.

“What happened to looking anywhere possible?” Jesse growled.

“If you would listen–!” Cecil started, but Jesse cut him off.

“And if you wanted to find this portal, you’d actually bother looking!” Jesse said, “At least I’m actually trying. What have YOU been doing? Taking your sweet time? Complaining? Not even bothering to look at those other rooms? It’s almost like you don’t wanna find that portal.”

“Maybe it’s because I have more knowledge about older shrines–”

“Or maybe it’s because you’re afraid the Visions are gonna kick you out the moment their old Sense comes back!” Jesse spat out. He wasn’t even thinking. He just wanted Cecil to shut up. And that look of hurt that flashed across Cecil’s face? It flickered a sick spark of joy in him.

Jesse pushed himself off the ground, “The Visions loved that guy, didn’t they? Anytime they talk about Antonin, they’re always so happy. I don’t think I’ve heard them say one good thing about you--”

Cecil grabbed onto Jesse and slammed him against the wall.

“You keep his name out of his mouth. You keep his name out of your filthy mouth!” Cecil hit Jesse against the wall again, “You don’t know a thing about him–you don’t know ANYTHING.” Cecil gripped onto Jesse’s face. His nails were piercing into Jesse as he brought his torch closer to his skin, “You don’t know about how kind he was, how much love he gave, you don’t–you–!”

“I know enough about you, freak!” Jesse kneed Cecil in the gut, making him drop the torch and stumble back.

Cecil clutched at his stomach.

Jesse watched as Cecil hunch over and gasped.

“Oh, yes, you’re just--you’re so, so smart, aren’t you?” Cecil’s unsteady breaths filled the hall, “Clearly… Clearly I was wrong. You know everything, don’t you?”

Slowly, Cecil straightened himself, his glare on Jesse unwavering.

“So then… Do you know what those dead friends of yours will think when they see you again?”

Jesse froze.

Cecil grabbed his torch, “Do you think they’ll be happy? Do you think they’ll want to be around you after everything you’ve done?” He got closer to Jesse.

Jesse opened his mouth, but Cecil kept going.

“Let’s not forget they were against The Awakening too. If they’re anything like your other disgusting friends, they’ll hate you just as much.”

It was quiet.

Cecil would’ve laughed. He would’ve gloated at the fact he managed to make Jesse look pathetic–feel pathetic–for once. But his night has long since been ruined.

Cecil dragged himself away, the torch’s light and warmth growing distant with him, “Go look upstairs. Get yourself killed for all I care.”

Jesse’s breaths were as shaky as his hands.

Lukas and Olivia would never hate him.

Never. Never. They’re good people. They’re great people. They’re wonderful.

They wouldn’t hate him. That–it wouldn’t make sense. They can't. They couldn’t. They love him. Cecil. Cecil, he’s crazy. He doesn’t–he’s not making sense. That doesn’t make sense. He doesn’t–he’s–

“What the hell do YOU know about having friends?! The only one you had left!” Jesse shouted.

“And yours abandoned you.” Cecil didn’t look back. He turned a corner, and Jesse was alone.

Jesse stared down the hall.

He trembled with anger.

He doesn’t need Cecil. He doesn’t need Aiden or his other ‘friends’.

He just needs Olivia and Lukas.

Then they can live with the Visions. Then life will be perfect.

Everything will be just perfect.

[inexplicifics]

i decided to make a note of all my thoughts and questions about the awau and it turned out to be 1500 words long lmfao, so i won’t subject you to all of it, and also i don’t have discord so i’m sry for the tumblr ask spam, feel free to ignore or answer privately or whatever if that’s easier- i’ll hold onto most of my questions and theories bc i imagine most of them will be answered eventually, but i have a handful of ficlet ideas, so, in no particular order:

when they go on progress, i imagine them getting so utterly miserable without the springs, even with accommodations at noble houses, that they convince yen to portal them home for one night and right back to the road after a soak lmao

do they have a visiting bard at kaer morhen during the progress to keep morale from tanking when jaskier and the rest of the court are gone for so long? bonus points if it’s pris and she falls in love with aubry, although i imagine he’s on jaskier guard duty so she might have to stick around after they get back

would fucking love a bit about dara and his family visiting sometime

might be iffy, since thinking about it the first time sent him into such a nasty panic spiral, but i can imagine jaskier running across livi somewhere in the keep while dragonfly is out on patrol maybe, and she’s having a bad day and feeling terrible about her family, and jaskier sits with her and bonds with her about having been sold to monsters and sent to their deaths by their fathers, and how to take all that rage and pain and betrayal that never quite go all the way away and turn them into something good, something powerful, because nobody understands what she’s gone through quite as well as he can, and also bc even though everyone knows what happened to him, and even though he’s very happy now, sometimes it still hurts to never have been loved by his parents, and there isn’t really anyone at the keep he can talk to about it

i bet lambert (or aiden maybe) at some point thinks it’s very funny to call jaskier “the queen of kaer morhen” and jaskier either tries to drown him in the baths or embraces it shamelessly and starts calling himself that

i woke up one night like a week ago with the phrase “my moonlit lord and my sunlit lover; between you i shall never walk in darkness” repeating over and over in my head, so idk if that’s anything but it’s yours if you want it

before i fell asleep last night i imagined a whole ficlet start to finish about jaskier thinking back on his arrival to kaer morhen (maybe set right after livi’s arrival and that panic attack) where he remembers that first introduction and realizes that when yen said “you’ve been needing a court bard!” with a smile on her face it was the first time in his life anyone had ever said they needed him, and that moment was a turning point in his life, from unwanted, unloved julian to adored, important jaskier, even if he was too overwhelmed to clock it at the time, and he goes to thank her and hugs her and makes her cry and she yells at him bc she didn’t spell her makeup unsmudgeable that morning and is he trying to make her look a mess you dreadful darling man? and also aubry cries and hugs him bc ofc he’s standing guard in the doorway and hears the whole thing and when geralt and eskel freak out bc he and aubry both smell like saltwater when they come back he tells them why and they cry too and it’s a very snuggly supper that night (and if yen gets randomly mobbed with surprise hugs from most of the wolf school for a few weeks, that’s probably normal and not at all related)

how different, physiologically, are aren’s pride from other witchers? does triss ever try to stabilize the false trial mutagens, or do they never come to trust her enough? or is it not necessary bc they’re totally fine now that they’re getting medical care and also fed and bathed and trained?

are any of aren’s old manticore friends or training class still around? what are those reunions like?

a ficlet of merten telling the whole insane story of geralt and ard carraigh and kaer morhen and everything that’s come after to aren and the pride would be amazing

obv i’ve developed “needs sasha/aiden content to live” disease like everyone else smsldkjt the wolves that love aiden need to stick together!! ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

ciri’s interactions with the an craites give me life, would LOVE to see her with her little brothers!!

i would kill for a look at griffin and marika’s wedding- milena and lambert must have gone, right? were their parents there???? how did that interaction go??????? and a royal wedding is the sort of occasion geralt and his court would need to attend, especially for one of his vassals, so did the whole crew show up together? how fun was it?? did the witchers get to make bitchfaces at the de roggevens all night? do griffin and marika love each other?? are marika and milena back in regular contact now?

i would love to see yen’s pov (or aubry’s) of how that meeting with vizimir and lettenhove went the night before the treaty signing, that they both came back from looking so smug

anyway thank you so incredibly very much for sharing your work and humoring us and all you do, you really are a gem of a human being

Oooh, look at all the bunnies!

Let me see now...

-I think the Progress is going to be broken up into lots of little jaunts, with stops back in Kaer Morhen for hot springs and decompression and trading out who gets to be escorting the Warlord and his household, so yes, everyone is going to be Very Glad to be home again, if only for a day or three.

-Oh, having a visiting bard is a fascinating idea! Hm. I'm still working on what to do with Priscilla...I'll have to think about that.

-Jaskier and Livi should have a bonding moment, you are quite correct. Hopefully Jaskier will not have another panic attack if he's a little more prepared for it.

-Jaskier would wear that title with great glee and Geralt would spend the month until the joke stopped being funny in a constant state of About To Go Up Mountain because he's not a king. (Sure he isn't.)

-Oooh, that's an absolutely lovely line - moonlit lord and sunlit lover, wow, that's got some resonance.

-Aww, hugs for Yen, all the hugs for Yen! And that sounds like a wonderful ficlet!

-There are some differences, which I am still figuring out; one of them has extremely keen night-vision combined with strong light sensitivity, and another might actually be venomous, which is going to be fun to figure out. One of these days, they'll let Triss have a very careful look at them, and it's possible they might need some magical intervention/stabilization, but mostly having Enough Food and Decent Medical Care and Competent and Compassionate Training is going to help all of them a lot.

-Several of Aren's old classmates are still around and they are having Feelings. Not sure yet how they're going to deal with those.

-Oh wow, that would be a fascinating ficlet. Aren would spend the whole time going "And then you what now?" while all the girls, who know some of the story from a very different perspective, would be boggling at things that Aren isn't even blinking at. ("You just...went over the walls?" "What, like it's hard?")

-I gotta get that Sasha/Aiden fic to cooperate, but unfortunately I'm starting to think it needs a complete rewrite. Ah well, such is life.

-...Ciri with her little brothers would be adorable. Maybe she should visit Skellige.

-I am attempting to write a Griffin/Marika fic! So far I am three chapters in and they haven't actually met yet. So that's...a thing.

-Oooh I'm not even entirely sure how that meeting went. Aubry got to loom, though. He's good at looming, even if he doesn't use the skill often.

Thank you so much for these wonderful bunnies and questions!

[writerfae]

Curative Cuddles

a sick fic I wrote a while ago while sick and in need of cuddles. Now I’m feeling sick again (damn headache) and I thought I’d post this because I can’t be productive today like I planned to

“Ugh, I hate my life.”

Talon buried his face deeper in his pillow. Or rather, Aiden’s pillow. Unfortunately, that only lead to another coughing fit, so he sat up.

After what felt like an eternity of coughing into the crook of his elbow, he calmed down.

His face however, Talon kept hiding in his arm. He groaned in frustration.

Someone nudged something cold against his arm and he looked up, met with the sight of his boyfriend sitting at the edge of their (usually) shared bed, holding out a water bottle to him. Talon took it.

“Thanks,” he mumbled and took a few big sips.

“Told you you need to stay hydrated or else your coughing will get worse,” Aiden scolded, but he looked pleased, now that Talon drank something. 

He touched his boyfriend’s forehead gently, brushing away blonde locks.

“At least the fever is gone now. Did you remember taking your meds?”

Talon rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah, mom. I did.”

He buried his face in Aiden’s shoulder. His boyfriend chuckled.

“You behave like a toddler when you’re sick. So you have to deal with me acting like your mom. Don’t get snot on my hoodie.”

Talon snorted, still not moving from his current position. “You mean my hoodie.”

“Okay, okay. Our hoodie. Still. Don’t get snot on it.”

Talon didn’t answer. Instead, he leaned even more into his boyfriend, relishing in his warmth.

The past few days, when he still had a fever, it was impossible for him to be close to Aiden, because he was always so warm and Talon was already burning hot from his fever.

Also, how Aiden had said “I don’t want your germs anywhere near me, I have an important exam this week.” 

So Aiden didn’t come close to Talon for the past whole week. He even refused to sleep in the same bed as him.

In other words, it was hell.

Of course, wonderful boyfriend that he was, he had still nursed him, had given him his medicine and provided him with soup, water, tissues and all sort of comfort food. 

Just that he did it from afar.

That meant no comfort cuddles for Talon. Even though in the past these had proven to be vital for his recovery.

Aiden had laughed when he told him that much. “Don’t worry, once my exam is done and your fever gone, you can have all the cuddles,” he had promised.

And now that time had finally come. He would never admit it, be he had been looking forward to this moment for the whole week.

Maybe Aiden was right when he said Talon was clingy when he’s sick. But truly, could you blame him? 

After all, he had suffered not only from a cold but also from a severe lack of boyfriend snuggles.

Talon put his arms around Aiden and tried to pull him into bed, but he failed miserably, still too weak from lying in bed all day. He coughed again. That damn cold.

He could feel more than hear Aiden’s chuckling. “What do you think you’re doing?” he asked, amused.

Talon huffed. “Come here already,” he mumbled into his boyfriend’s collarbone. “You promised cuddles.”

Aiden laughed. “So clingy,” he mumbled fondly and shoved him gently to the side to make room for himself on their shared bed. 

Talon was all too glad to move over for his boyfriend.

As soon as Aiden was comfortably settled, Talon made his home in his boyfriend’s arms. He rested his head on Aiden’s chest, holding him close. 

It felt so nice to finally touch him again.

With one of Aiden’s hands brushing through his hair and his comforting presence so close to him, Talon could feel himself relax.

Aiden had always been able to calm him like that. There was a reason he always slept better with his boyfriend near. 

Aiden’s heartbeat was steady near his ear, ever an effective lullaby.

He was just about to drift off to sleep, when suddenly he sneezed loudly, startling both of them.

“What the hell?” Aiden looked bewildered. He, too, must’ve started to fall asleep.

“Sorry,” Talon mumbled. Then he looked up to Aiden and giggled. “I’m afraid there now is snot on our hoodie.”

His boyfriend made a face. “Gross.”

Talon only laughed more. “That was a joke, you know?”

Aiden hummed. 

“It better be, or I’ll shove you off right now to get changed and don't come back all day,” he threatened, but the way his arms tightened around Talon gave away that he didn’t mean it.

“You wouldn’t,” Talon said, resting his head against Aiden’s chest again. “You love me too much.”

Now it was Aiden who laughed. It was warm and gentle, just like his embrace.

“I do,” he said softly, kissing the crown of Talon’s hair. His hand found his way back into soft blonde curls.

With a smile, Talon finally fell asleep and when he woke up the next morning, he felt as well rested as ever.

Maybe cuddles really were the best medicine.

*

au masterpost

general tag list: @deadlycupid @writing-is-a-martial-art @writingamongther0ses @blueinkblot @wildswrites @abiandwriting @theroyalcoven @myhusbandsasemni @authortango @charleeyy @formulatingfiction @shiishki @gr3y-heron @bloodlessheirbyjacques @imstillherebitch

[lambden]

T (for Lambert’s foul language/mentions of sex), 1.4K, modern AU Lambden with trans sex-repulsed Lambert on his period

Also on AO3!

I’ll come over in a few if that still works for you 😚

“Fuck,” Lambert groans, rolling towards his right side so that he can smother himself in his pillow. He knew he was forgetting something tonight but his brain feels cloudy, pinpricks of attention piercing through only when his abdomen seizes up in pain. The cramps were just getting manageable too. Even if he still would have wrestled with his roiling stomach until he passed out, his suffering was at least diminished.

But the text sounds so hopeful. God fucking damn it. Lambert lifts his head only enough to blearily squint at his phone, where Aiden’s message is still brightly plastered across his screen. If that still works for you sounds like an out, although he isn’t sure if it’s one he wants to take. Lambert hasn’t seen his boyfriend all week and he knows it would be nice to have Aiden here.

Swearing more under his breath, he types yes that works i’m not feeling 100 percent tho before abruptly slamming his face back into his pillow. His boyfriend’s company would be pleasant if not for the severity of Lambert’s misery— not much helps when his periods get this bad.

And to make matters worse, Lambert is doing everything by the book this time and he still feels like shit. He made fennel tea which has gone cold on his nightstand. He filled a hot water bottle and then instantly misplaced it, and now he can’t be fucked to find a substitute. Light exercise sometimes works, but early this afternoon he went for a walk, and it had just left him feeling more miserable than before. He’s replying to people instead of ghosting the conversation, but he still doesn’t have it in him to put on a brave face— not even for his partner of nearly two years.

He curls up a little tighter, breathing deeply as he massages his stomach just below the waistband of his baggy sweatpants. It doesn’t help. Nothing helps, which probably means Aiden won’t help either. But Lambert still selfishly wants him to come by, even if he’ll just find the hot waterbottle, play with Lambert’s hair for a good twenty minutes, and then leave without fanfare.

That is, until Aiden’s reply buzzes: I have something fun for you that’ll cheer you up. 😉

Lambert’s breath catches in his throat. Thankfully there’s no attached image, only the winking emoticon— nudes were never really Aiden’s style anyway. Or if the man does like taking photographs like that, Lambert hasn’t seen them and doesn’t intend to. He’s only had sex with Aiden a handful of times over their three year relationship and only a few times more over the course of his life. At the best of times, Lambert has been indifferent to sex.

At the worst of times, he abhors it, and right now he is definitely closer to that violent revulsion than just simple disinterest. Lambert can’t think of a single thing that he wants less right now than to have sex on a particularly bad period day, and for a moment he’s tempted to just cancel.

But as he scrolls up through their conversation history, he’s surprised and disappointed to find that he and Aiden have exchanged very few messages while apart this week. Aside from trading a few memes back and forth, it’s been practical radio silence. So Lambert makes up his mind, finally deciding that blowing Aiden off is a lot less worse than just blowing him.

“Fuck,” he whines yet again, wincing at the pounding in his abdomen before flopping onto his back. He gingerly rises from his beloved bed so he can prepare for his only-slightly-less beloved lover. If Aiden is coming over with any sort of expectations at all, then Lambert needs to at least fulfil the fantasy by looking half-decent. And he could really do with some mouth-wash.

As he reheats his tea in the microwave, Lambert drags his feet around the apartment a little. ‘A few’ is colloquial and vague enough that it could mean anything from half an hour to thirty seconds, and so Lambert is stuck in limbo. He fluctuates between stubbornly thinking that Aiden will just have to deal with his bullshit and panicking over very minor messes. After lingering in the bathroom for a full five minutes erasing smudge after smudge from the mirror and wincing in pain the entire time, Lambert sadly goes to reheat his tea yet again.

He burns his tongue just as the front door shakes with a loud knock. “Fucking cock-shit dick me down fuck,” exclaims Lambert, glaring at his equally aggrieved reflection. Yeah, fine, it’s late, but since his neighbours haven’t made a noise complaint by now he doubts they ever will.

He sets the tea down on the counter, nearly stomping over to the entrance and slamming the door open so violently that it shakes in its frame. Standing on the other side is the always gorgeous Aiden, who has gone to the trouble of looking especially gorgeous tonight in a pullover shirt fitted closely to his chest and fancy dark green trousers that match his jacket. His slightly rumpled curly hair is cleanly coiffed, hanging down over his forehead as if he’s a model. He isn’t, because the universe is unfair and makes no sense.

Gorgeous, stupidly perfect Aiden raises a hand to wave in greeting, even though they’re only standing two feet apart. A small gift bag dangles from his other hand— just the sight of it is enough to induce instant anxiety. In the most charming, teasing tone imaginable, Aiden supplies, “Hey, stranger.”

“I can’t,” Lambert says, tripping over his burnt tongue. This is not how he had intended for this to go, but he abruptly discovers that he cannot stop: “I love you, but I just, there’s absolutely no way, I just can’t! I don’t want to lead you on, you sent me that fucking winking emoticon and you brought me some present and you look… really, really fucking good.”

“Thank you,” Aiden beams. Uncertainty clouds his dark brown eyes, catching in the wrinkle between his brows and making him tremble where usually he stands still and strong.

“I’m happy you’re here,” continues Lambert, deflating. “But I… Tonight, I’m just… I’m really not in the fucking mood.” He would clap himself on the back for that excellent innuendo if he wasn’t too busy struggling with self-loathing and bracing for the impact of Aiden’s inevitable frustration.

Except Aiden just shrugs with one shoulder, not even flinching as his smile stays firmly in place. “Yeah, that’s alright. Me neither, really. Do you want to see what I got you?”

The wind fully knocked out of Lambert’s sails, he is left with no option but to sort of stare at the little bag hanging off Aiden’s wrist. “……… Yes?”

With a dramatic flourish Aiden reveals the gift, presenting it with the widest imaginable shit-eating grin. If he’d looked pleased before, that was nothing compared to now. Lambert has never seen him this gleeful. He hands over a small metal tin with a green label declaring the contents— Novelty Dill Pickle Breath Mints.

Lambert blinks. Aiden doesn’t move at all, grin only slightly starting to fade after a beat of silence. If Lambert even begins to consider the tenderness and significance of this gesture and how easily Aiden had changed tack for his sake, his hormonal brain is going to make him start crying right here in the open doorway. So before Aiden can have any second thoughts, Lambert deadpans, “How do you know my breath stinks?”

The reassured warmth floods Aiden’s smile once more. “I kiss you sometimes, don’t I?”

“So ridiculous,” snorts Lambert, the brief tension fracturing into familiar comfort. Aiden steps closer and crowds into him but doesn’t kiss him, instead pulling him into a close embrace. The door shuts behind them and Lambert sinks into the hug and rests his head against his boyfriend’s shoulder, relaxing for the first time tonight. Aiden smells like fresh linens and some undefinable scent unique to him; Lambert basks in it. “Here I thought you had some big plan for the evening, and you show up with a fucking gag gift. Unbelievable.”

“Well, did it cheer you up?” The slight stammer is the only indicator that Aiden is at all questioning himself, his question otherwise flawlessly charming.

Lambert reaches down to the small of Aiden’s back, rubbing his fingers there in slow circles. “You cheer me up.” It’s unbearably cheesy but the happy little sigh that Aiden exhales is entirely worth it. Lambert thinks, with sudden surety, that he may have found the perfect period remedy.

-

(The pickle mints.)

-

(Aiden too, perhaps.)

[championofsanghelios]

Watch Dogs Legion - "M"

This was written by me, remember. So expect the usual errors, typos and word bugs (bzz.) --- [11.11.2029] [THE EARLS FORTUNE] [2044 HOURS] --- "...that's not my point!" Jackson says as he pushes the door open, his waterproof dripping wet from the rain that was lashing down outside. "You need to stop being so reckless, and actually consider the risks to yourself...as well as others."

"There's no fun in being careful!" Wrench replies, following him in. He was absolutely soaked through, but didn't seem to care. "It takes away the unpredictability...which is what I love about those Ops. Just showing up with my Lady Smash and some home made explosives...it's great!"

"That's another thing I need to talk to you about." Jackson pulls off his waterproof, draping it over one of the radiators near the wall. "There's breaking things, then there's vaporizing them..."

Connie comes out of the back room, letting out a laugh when she sees them both. "Well Well, you two took your time getting back."

"Only because this one here decided an Albion Comms Tower needed to be demolished." Jackson says, moving past her into the backroom where he locates a towel to dry his hair. "I'm yet to figure out how he wasn't caught or killed."

"You're making a name for yourself, Reggie." Connie says, moving around to the other side of the bar. "Not entirely sure if it's a good one, but...a name nonetheless."

"Yeah well, I'm just prepared to do whatever is necessary to take this city back." Wrench shrugs, gladly accepting the beer she places on the bar for him. "If that involves blowing up Albion property or smashing up Blume server stacks with my hammer, so fucking be it."

"It's dangerous." Jackson appears from the backroom, tossing the towel at him. "You better change that sweater by the way. You'll catch a chill."

"What are you my mother!?" Wrench let's out a modulated grunt, pulling up his mask slightly and downing about half of the beer he'd been handed. "Give me a break, we made it back okay!"

"And what happens if you end up getting arrested, or seriously wounded?" Jackson asks, opting for a bottle of water instead of anything alcoholic.

"Oh no." Wrench shakes his head placing his bottle down on the bars surface, his exposed mouth smirking. "There's no injuries with me. Either I get the job done, or die trying."

"You genuinely don't care if you live or die?" Jackson asks, giving him a look. "Seriously?"

"I don't have this for nothing." Wrench points at the anarchy symbol on his neck. "I don't live by rules, that includes the ones to do with life and death."

Jackson is about to say something when the door pushes open and Aiden comes in, feeling about as miserable as he looked. He was wet, but not in the same way the two of them were, something else had happened to him. "Wow! What happened to you!"

"I fell in the Thames." Aiden grumbles, shaking the water from the sleeves of his overcoat. "...actually I dove in there after some thugs caught me stalking them."

"Oh that reminds me!" Connie suddenly pipes up, her hand tapping Wrench's right forearm. "There was a bloke in here earlier on. He was asking for you."

"A bloke?" Wrench replies, questions marks lighting up his askew mask. He downs more of his beer. "Who was it?"

"No idea." Connie shakes her head, smiling. She reaches under the bar, taking out a small piece of white card paper. "But he was lovely, all charms...asked me to pass this onto you."

Wrench eyes the card for a second, opting to pull off his mask entirely. He takes a hold of it, turning it around. Someone had written a note in red-ink.

YOU NEED TO ANSWER YOUR PHONE, MAN ALSO THE WEATHER HERE IS NUTS!!! SEND ME A MESSAGE WHEN YOU GET THIS oh...and thank Connie for the free cookies. - M

He suddenly let's out a cough as he chokes on the beer he's drinking. Lifting the card up. "...motherfucker!"

"What?" Jackson stops trying to wrestle his Uncle out of his coat. "What is it?"

"I'll be right back." Wrench says, leaving his beer and his mask at the bar. He heads out into the rain, ignorant to the fact that it was making him wetter than he already was.

Taking his out his phone, he swipes up the contacts tab, scrolling down until he finds the right number. He thumbs it, his Optik lighting up and dialling.

After a tone or two, he hears a click.

"You took your time." Marcus' voice was something that he would never ever tire of hearing, especially now, especially after all of the shit he'd been through the last year or two. "I was wondering if Connie would get that to you."

"You're here." is all Wrench can say, unsure of what he should do now. Part of him wanted to jump for joy, another wanted to cry. "...you're actually here. In London."

"Yeah, I guess I couldn't just sit there in SF and let you have all the fun." Marcus chuckles. "...that little job we did together a few months back reminded me of how much I enjoyed having you around."

"Where are you right now?" Wrench asks, reaching up this face, rubbing at it. "Are you nearby?"

"Why?" Marcus asks, a smile evident in his voice. "You that desperate to see me?"

"Yes." Wrench admits it there and then. In truth there hadn't been anything he wanted to do more than see him again. "...It was the same for me. I didn't realise how much fun I used to have with you until you found me through, Jordi."

He moves over to one of the benches, sitting down on it. All around him, London was going about it's business, people were walking past, umbrellas in hand, hoods covering their heads. Looking out across Parliament Green, he sighs.

"I hear you've been having some fun outwith our little shared Op." Marcus says. "Something about killing Nigel Cass?"

"He had it coming." Wrench snorts bitterly, shaking his head. "Fuckin' maniac thought he could subvert justice and launch a coup...which reminds me, I've got to introduce you to the Dick."

"The Dick?" he hears the Hipster's confusion. "Who's that? Dusan's cousin?"

"Might as well be." the Anarchist nods, smiling to himself. "His name is Richard Malik...and he's a massive prick...but he's been useful to us."

"Wait...is that the same Richard Malik who was appointed Director of SIRS, only to be exposed literally 2 days later?" Marcus asks.

"That's the one." Wrench nods, sitting forwards. Staring at the concrete between his shoes. "I should send you the vids from when Bagley used his own FILAMENT against him."

"FILAMENT?"

"...what were his exact words?" Wrench's eyes narrow. "It's like...Nudle, but with instant access to all information about every person in the UK...basically George Orwell's wet dream."

The laugh that Marcus let's out is cathartic, such a delightfully bright noise, and one he could never get enough of. One he hoped he would hear more of soon.

It's short lived though, as a whole load of other feelings come to the surface in the pause that follows. He deflates a little. "I've missed having you around, M."

"I know." Marcus replies.

"So where are you?" Wrench asks. "Are you coming back this way? Or am I going to have to find you?"

He gets no response to those questions. His eyes narrow slightly. "M?"

Suddenly there's a movement in his peripherals, at which point a hand appears, holding his mask. He looks at it for a second, almost stunned.

"You're making a habit of leaving that thing lying around..." Marcus says, having just sat down next to him. "...am I gonna have to retrieve it for you every time you misplace it?"

Wrench doesn't move, he just sits there, frozen in place. Marcus had aged, much like himself, but not in the way he was expecting. He still looked pretty much the same as he always had, spare the scruff around his face and neck, which had turned into a full beard...and a little tinge of silver hair on his fringe.

Something shifts inside him at that moment, a tightness in his core that he wasn't even aware of unravels. A laughs bubbles out of him, one that turns to a sob half-way, and without so much as a word he puts an arm around him and pulls him into a hug, hiding his face in his shoulder.

"Huh." Marcus says, placing the mask onto his lap and closing the hug. "Of all the reactions I was ready for...this wasn't one of them."

"Shut up." Wrench says, his voice muffled by his shoulder. "Just-...Just shut up."

Marcus laughs out loud again.

. . .

[witcher-and-his-bard-archive]

Locked Out

winter prompts day 10 ❄️ lost in a storm

 If Jaskier was a stupider man, he'd be confused about the sheer amount of times he and Geralt seem to be getting stuck places together. But he and Geralt had been the first to arrive and these things only started happening after both Eskel and Lambert had reached the keep. Jaskier can put two and two together and come to the conclusion that none of this is an accident.

Unfortunately for him, Jaskier also knows why it's happening. Witchers can smell all sorts of stupid, inconvenient shit, one of the more prominent (and most inconvenient) of those being the changes in human emotion. Meaning that if Jaskier wants to keep his feelings to himself, he has to try very hard to do so. And he discovered almost as soon as the other Witchers showed up that he is terrible at it. The only conclusion he can come to is that between the four of them, they've come to the (albeit correct) conclusion, that Jaskier is hopelessly in love with Geralt, and set themselves to the task of getting together.

What they don't know, is that Geralt barely tolerates Jaskier at the best of times and getting them together is a lost cause. He wants to confront them about it, but he rather likes the time he gets to spend alone with Geralt, whether they're cooking or cleaning or chopping wood. Geralt is different up at the keep than he is on the Path and Jaskier likes this friendlier, more open side of him. So, as long as no one is getting hurt (himself notwithstanding) he decides there's nothing wrong with their little game. They think they're solving a problem and Jaskier gets to spend some time with his friend in a place that's comfortable for him.

Then, one day, they're all gathered in the main hall. Vesemir has long grown tired of Geralt and Lambert's bickering and has retired to his room or the library or wherever it is he goes when he's had enough. Jaskier is once again left alone with the younger wolves and Aiden and he's enjoying the conversation, but he finds himself tuning out more and more often tonight, wondering what it was like to grow up in a place like this.

He knows it was very different then, that there were many more Witchers who called Kaer Morhen home, but he doesn't dare ask more than that. He's gleaned enough from the little bits and pieces from Geralt to know that his childhood was not a happy one and if he's happier here now, Jaskier doesn't want to stir up bad memories.

Jaskier doesn't realize he's staring at Geralt until Lambert nudges him. He shales his head and turns around to a very smug look.

"Aiden's gonna grab drinks," Lambert says, "why don't you and Geralt go get more firewood while we settle up in here." Jaskier nods obediently, casting a quick look in Geralt's direction to see if he suspects anything. Geralt just sighs as he rises to his feet. Jaskier follows suit and traipses after Geralt toward the large doors.

They've only been outside a couple of seconds when Jaskier hears the doors click shut behind them and the sound of the lock being slid across. He spins on his heel immediately and Geralt takes a few steps back, pressing on the door, to no avail.

"You can come back in when you figure your shit out!" Lambert calls through the door. Jaskier can hear them mumbling afterward, but it's too quiet to hear properly. Geralt sighs and rolls his eyes.

"Idiots," he mumbles and turns back to Jaskier. He seems surprisingly calm, but Jaskier feels immediately guilty. This is his fault. He shouldn't have let the game go on for so long and now they're stuck out in the cold until, well, until Lambert and his cohorts decide that they've figured their shit out - something Jaskier knows won't happen.

Fuck. He should have talked to Eskel when he had the chance. He knows Eskel would have listened, that he wouldn't want to force Geralt into something he's uncomfortable with. He might have even talked to Lambert and Aiden about it, gotten them to call it off as well, but Jaskier had been greedy. He had wanted too badly to spend time with Geralt that he hadn't considered things might get out of hand, and now they have.

All at once, he realizes the only way to solve this is to own up to his own feelings. Maybe it will make Geralt uncomfortable for a little while and maybe he won't want to travel with him any longer, but it's his fault for not saying something earlier. Now, it's the only thing he can do to fix this.

He turns to try to explain to Geralt, but when he does, Geralt is smirking back at him.

"Bastards," he mumbles, "what do you say we beat them at their own game?"

Jaskier, stunned, just looks at him.

"I-" if that's what Geralt wants, how could Jaskier turn him down considering this is his fault. "Alright, what do you have in mind?"

"Find somewhere to hide out until they come looking for us," Geralt smirks. Jaskier finds himself at a loss. Ever since coming to Kaer Morhen, he's been continuously surprised about how much fun Geralt really could be when he was comfortable enough to let go. He finds himself agreeing without even thinking through what a terrible idea this could actually be.

"Come on," Geralt says, "we'll head up to the old watchtower and watch them from there."

It's a great idea in theory. In practice, Jaskier will be oblivious to whatever Geralt is watching and he's already wondering why he agreed to this. They barely make it down the hill before it starts to snow and Jaskier sighs to himself. He doesn't quite understand why he's feeling so bad about all of this because Geralt seems to be having a perfectly fine time with it and regularly Jaskier would be thrilled to (team up) with him, but tonight, he's still feeling a little guilty about everything.

A part of him is even hoping Geralt will turn around when the snow starts, but he doesn't and it only starts to snow more heavily. Jaskier does his best to keep up but finds he's falling behind and eventually gives up when he loses sight of Geralt altogether.

"Geralt!" he shouts and for a moment there's no response. Great, he was stupid enough to keep playing along with this and now he's going to die for it, lost and frozen in the middle of fucking nowhere.

He drops to his knees in the snow and is almost immediately hauled back up to his feet. Geralt's arm wraps around his shoulders and suddenly Jaskier is being walked forward through the snow. He has no idea if they're going in the same direction or if they've turned around, but he trusts Geralt to keep him safe.

He doesn't know how long they walk before coming upon a partial structure, half-buried in the snow. Jaskier is pushed inside and Geralt follows shortly, brushing the snow off of himself and then Jaskier. Before he can stop to consider his options, Jaskier is being tugged down into Geralt's lap and bundled up in his arms. He squirms but Geralt holds him close.

"Just... let me warm you up. You're nearly frozen." Jaskier wants to point out that it's Geralt's fault he's nearly frozen, but he's feeling more miserable than bitter.

Reluctantly, he lets Geralt hold him and hopes that he's considered warmed up sooner rather than later. He relaxes into it after a moment, but he's hyperaware of every place they touch. Geralt's hands are warm and comforting, but when they slip under the hem of his shirt, Jaskier pulls away.

"I'm sorry," he whispers, "I can't let you do this."

"Do... what?" Geralt asks. The expression on his face is a combination of hurt and confusion and Jaskier hates it, but he knows this is for the best.

"Treat me like this," he mumbles. "It's my fault we're in this place."

"Jaskier, I wasn't going to force you through the snow-"

"I don't mean here in this little shack, Geralt. I mean locked outside the keep in the first place." At this point, Geralt looks at him like he's speaking a whole other language and Jaskier sighs. His shoulders slump and he braces himself, but he supposes it was bound to come out at some point. It's been twenty years, after all.

"You know what they're doing, right?" Jaskier asks and Geralt shrugs.

"Being idiots."

"No." Jaskier pauses, but he can't bring himself to look up at Geralt. He's imagined telling Geralt how he feels time and time again, but he never expected it to be an apology. "Geralt they're trying to get us alone together on purpose. Because of my- because of the way I feel about you. Witchers can smell feelings or whatever, right? And I'm not as good at hiding it as I thought I was, so they've obviously figured it out. And I know they're just trying to help, but they don't realize that you don't-" he chokes on the words He's thought they dozens of times, but knowing Geralt doesn't feel the same and saying it out loud are two different things.

"Jask?" Geralt says softly and when Jaskier looks up, he's moved closer and he's smiling softly at him. "Is that why you think they're doing this?" Jaskier nods and Geralt sighs and shuts his eyes. "Jaskier, come here."

"Are you sure?"

"Jaskier."

"Okay, okay." He shuffles closer again, letting Geralt's arms wind around him. He tries not to press into him, but the hut is cold and Geralt is so warm and he smells wonderful, like leather and smoke and home and Jaskier is so worried about being so close that he doesn't realize Geralt is talking until he rests his chin on Jaskier's head.

"Did you hear anything I just said?"

"Uh. Yes?" Geralt sighs and does something that Jaskier can only assume is nosing at his hair.

"I didn't know about your... feelings. I thought they were just fucking with me." His arms close in a little tighter and Jaskier is too confused to fight against it. Geralt chuckles softly and Jaskier is fairly certain he's actually imagining things when he feels soft lips press against his head. "If I'd known you were amenable, I would have kissed you a long time ago and gotten them off our backs."

At that, Jaskier is certain something is wrong. Geralt doesn't just say things like that. He pulls out of his arms, turning to face him.

"Are you sick?" he asks and Geralt tips forward, swiftly closing the space between them and catching Jaskier's lips in a soft kiss.

Jaskier's mind goes entirely blank and he forgets what he's supposed to do with someone's mouth against his own. Then, Geralt's thumb comes up to brush against his cheek and when Geralt deepens the kiss, Jaskier moans softly and his reflexes take over, leaning into the kiss and wrapping his arms around Geralt's shoulders.

Without hesitation, Geralt winds his arms around his waist, hauling Jaskier up into his lap and leaning back against the wall. The kiss seems to last an eternity and no time at all and when Jaskier pulls away it's only because he's abruptly aware that he still needs to breathe.

"Oh," he breathes and Geralt smiles at him, reaching up to brush a stray strand of hair back behind Jaskier's ear.

"I've wanted to do that for a long time."

"Me too. I suppose this means we'll have to thank the other?"

Geralt chuckles as he curls a hand around the back of Jaskier's neck and draws him close for another kiss. "Not a chance."

[what-nani-ano]

Now about Wanri's mother, Regra Scarlett

Her name was Regra Genesis formerly. She's usually a harsh and uncaring mother. She's quite mentally abusive toward her children. She wasn't always like this, it's because Aiden forced her to marry him even though she doesn't love him at all and he killed her lover. The discontent from the forced marriage changed her from a caring girl to a Cold Queen

She felt awfully guilty for treating her children like that but she can't do anything about it, merely looking them is only a reminder of her miserable life now. Regra know more than anyone else, her children don't have any faults in her marriage. Sometimes she's nice to her children but those are rare moments

She's also very strict like Riddle's mother especially to Wanri since she's the Grand Princess. She educated Wanri as preparation for the Queen position, yes Regra is a incredibly knowledgeable and diligent woman despite being ill-tempered all the time. She's considered one of the most intelligent women in the Empire and she do her duties as The Queen very well

The name Regra is derived from "Regret". It depicts her life full of Regret. She regretted meeting Aiden, she regretted treating her children so badly, she regretted she wasn't able to save her lover, she regretted everything

Woahh... I feel bad for her mother, her name is a clever way to subtly tell about her backstory 😢���

at least she has a reason for being strict... poor woman- KILL THE KING >:((( *grabbing pitchforks* I'll probably be slaughtered by guards bUT OH WELL-

[jaskiersvalley]

There are many reasons why @fontegagrilledcheese deserves all the love in the world. It's been a wild couple of weeks. Given that moons ago she asked for some Letho/Eskel with Two Trucks by Lemon Demon in mind. Given that it's also MerMay, I couldn't not set this all underwater. It veers into spicy territory!

Two Trucks

"Have you heard?" Lambert swam a circle around Aiden, tail gleaming in the low light. "There was another freak wave surge on Skelligen beaches."

"How? How do they do it?" Fidgeting with a patch of scales on his hip, Aiden forced out a rush of water from his gills in a sigh. "I know they're big but it's not like they're krakens in season."

Lambert cackled as he did another loop, constantly on the move. However, he was giggling and reaching to playfully slap Aiden's tail with his in an invitation to a game of chase. When it wasn't met with the usual joyous growl, he used his hands to tug Aiden. "Come on, I want to show you something."

It didn't take long to reach Skellige where Lambert urged them up towards the surface. They were a good distance from the shore so two heads bobbing along wasn't going to be noticed by anyone.

"Watch." Under the surface Lambert linked their hands, his tail brushing against Aiden's in a rhythm as he tried to keep still but failed miserably.

A bridge had been built between two of the islands, widened over the years. Lambert had been fascinated, watching from afar for the most part before joining in and helping Eskel relocate the fish and other living things from where the humans had sunk the supports. Horses and carriages were soon replaced by foul smelling machines which became bigger and less obnoxious as time went on.

"It's pretty rare," Lambert murmured, worried their presence might be heard from the bridge, "but sometimes two of the big ones will charge at each other and make the whole bridge shake. Then all the smaller ones come rushing and the humans actually get out. It's a weird breeding technique."

A low chuckle turned into a throaty laugh and Aiden dipped under the water as he forgot to stay floating. Following him down, Lambert twisted and turned around him, waiting for his mirth to pass. Each time it looked like Aiden might calm, he looked at Lambert, held up his two hands and crashed them in front of his chest, and Aiden sent himself off on another round of laughter. Really, Lambert didn't mind, he thought Aiden was quite beautiful like that. Not that he'd ever say it out loud.

"As much as I love your theory-" Aiden ran a hand through his hair, pushing it out from where it had floated into his face, "-I don't think that's quite how Eskel and Letho have sex."

"Yeah?" Lambert wriggled his eyebrows. "Tell me, oh wise one, how do they do it then?"

Turning, Aiden began swimming back towards their home, trusting Lambert to follow.

"Oh I don't know. I mean-" he trailed off with a smirk, "-you've seen the size of their hands, right? Imagine those thick fingers teasing cocks out that look large even in their palms."

As long as Lambert could forget this was Eskel's sex life they were talking about in such detail, he was fine. Especially if he didn't consider why Aiden had put so much thought into it all. Though, to be fair, given his question earlier, it wasn't like his mind didn't stray in that direction from time to time.

"I think-" Aiden pushed on, undeterred by Lambert's mental jaunt, "-despite their size, they're really rather tender. Maybe even because of their size."

"Nah." Shaking his head, Lambert looped lazy circles around Aiden. "They made those waves. Got to be something freakish. I think they do it in the kelp beds, get tangled up and thrash about."

It was Aiden's turn to snort and shake his head. "Eskel cares too much about the environment. He wouldn't ruin a bed like that."

A fair point and Lambert conceded. "Maybe they fuck without twining their tails. All the extra motion from such large appendages, it's bound to cause waves."

"Maybe. They are pretty damn muscular. It's a lot of flexing they're capable of doing." He went quiet for a moment before continuing. "I like to think though that they take it easy, gentle. Shit's been real rough for us all, especially them. I mean, they're outliers even among us freaks. So maybe Letho lies them down in a woven kelp bed. They stay pressed close together, hands gently roving over skin, scars and scales."

"They probably would take ages before even touching each other where it matters," Lambert snorted. "They do seem like the romantic sap types."

Humming, Aiden nodded. "Indeed. But they'd take their time teasing each other out from their slits. Both cocks sliding out to be palmed in those large, worn hands. Do you think Letho would let Eskel fuck between his cocks?"

Caught up in the fantasy without names, the reminded that it was Eskel and Letho pulled Lambert back from the rather pleasant path his mind was taking. He was busy thinking about what it might feel like to have Aiden's cock sliding between his.

"Only an idiot would do that," he bit back. "So yeah, Letho would."

They had taken up swimming chest to chest, lazily spinning and drifting together. Aiden took a chance and pulled Lambert down against his chest.

"And how much of an idiot are you?"

Somewhat offended by the question, Lambert was about to retaliate with a scathing sneer. The meaning of the words struck then and he swallowed hard. Glancing around, he spotted a sandy shallow that looked quite comfortable.

"I don't know, perhaps the biggest idiot there is." He pulled them together, their tails moving in sync to propel them through the water. "Why don't we pause for a little while and find out?"

[justalarryblog]

🎆Thank You, Daddy by @recklessandbrave (10k) | Explicit

Harry’s hot, wet mouth is around him before Louis even has the chance to blink, and it feels so good, the icy sting of the frozen dessert disappearing as Harry’s soft tongue laps it up. After Harry swallows, he pulls off the head of Louis’ cock and then dips down to trail his tongue up the shaft, collecting the bits that dribbled down. “Yummy. Thank you, daddy.” He hums pleasantly.

Or the one where Louis gets an idea, and Harry wears panties

Part 2 of Pastel

🎆Stillness Is The Move by @turnyourankle (2k) | Explicit

Harry fails to follow instructions and requires punishment.

🎆And I know he’ll be the death of me, at least we’ll both be numb by @capturethesunset (3k) | Not Rated

Louis getting wrecked by jealous Harry.

🎆give and take by @sky_reid (1k) | Explicit

sometimes louis just needs.

🎆we’re still going, eight in the morning by @nooelgallagher, @yoursongonmyheart (31k) | Explicit

Harry washes his hands quickly before grabbing his phone. His screen lights up to 3 notifications.

DJTommo is now following you!

@DJTommo mentioned you in a tweet!

Direct Message from @DJTommo!

Harry yelps, throwing his phone to Niall who just barely catches it.

Niall looks down at the phone, seeing first the tweet, then the DM. He tosses the phone back to Harry, who nearly drops it. “What are ya doing, mate! Answer him!”

Harry thinks for a moment about what he wants to say. This is his chance to actually talk to Louis Tomlinson. Louis Tomlinson messaged him directly. He can say anything he wants. He begins typing, his fingers shaky.

Niall comes over to stand next to Harry and peers down, looking to see what he wrote. When he does, he lets out a groan.

…Or, the one where Harry owns a bakery, Louis is a radio DJ, and Niall and Liam roll their eyes at their incessant flirting.

🎆When I hear your cries, praying for life. (I will be there) by @brokenbeauty (5k) | Explicit

Well, I figured we needed Larry birthday sex, soooo….. ;))))

🎆St. Austin’s School for Boys by @domtommo, @winsomefreak (100k) | Explicit

St. Austin’s School for Boys is a correction school for young men that uses corporal punishment as their means of discipline. After one too many infractions, Harry Styles is sent there till graduation. Upon arriving Harry meets his dorm advisor who also happens to be the first year sex-education teacher and footie coach, Louis Tomlinson. Harry falls in absolute adoration for the teacher and is all too ready to drop down onto his knees for him. During his stay he learns some very interesting things about himself… Welcome to St. Austin’s School for Boys, where the hallways are filled with love, drama, and sex.

Part 1 of St. Austin’s School for Boys

🎆I’m Gonna Love You (Until You Hate me) by @sweaterpawstyles (8k) | Explicit

As if reading his mind, Louis glanced over his glasses at Harry, presumably because Harry didn’t reply to his statement earlier.

“I decided to get my glasses out again,” he chuckled, winking at Harry. “Do you like them?“

Harry felt his face heat up. No, he didn’t just like them. He fucking loved them and wanted to ride Louis and call him daddy while he wore them. But he didn’t want to just tell Louis this.

Or

Louis wears glasses and Harry doesn’t like to be teased

🎆jump in the deep end by @istajmaal (4k) | Explicit

Louis’s stomach lurches as he closes the last bit of distance, Harry’s nose settling between his arse cheeks and pushing them apart. Harry’s lips brush against the puckered skin around Louis’s hole in a kiss and Louis lets out a whine so high-pitched he barely recognizes it as coming from himself—what if I’m not clean enough, what if Harry hates it, what if Harry pushes me away—but then Harry’s long, wet tongue swoops in a circle around Louis’s rim and Louis feels like all the breath is knocked out of him. He grabs for Harry’s hand, still digging into his thigh, and squeezes over it, until Harry releases his vice grip on Louis’s thigh and laces his fingers through Louis’s.

or, Louis’s arse is a sensitive subject, so Harry approaches it gently. With his tongue.

🎆daddy daddy cool by @sky_reid (6k) | Explicit

harry wakes up hard.

🎆Truth Be Told (I Never Was Yours) by @JustForTommo (76k) | Explicit

Harry watches Louis as he scrunches up his nose and bites the end of a pen in concentration. He’s been working on seating arrangements for the past hour and getting more frustrated by the minute. Louis huffs out a breath and glances down at Harry with a soft smile on his lips before he returns to the task at hand. It’s easy, right then, for Harry to let himself believe that they’re planning a seating chart for their own wedding and bickering over who is going to sit where from a list of their own family members. He can let himself daydream about a white picket fence and a dog that they could have within the next year.

It’s like a cold slap in the face when Harry looks to the top of the page to see “Aiden and Louis Grimshaw” at the head table, and Harry has to mentally remind himself for the thousandth time that Louis is not his. Never was, really. He’s just the wedding planner that’s been in love with Louis since he was sixteen.

(or the one where Louis and Harry have a complicated past, Louis is getting married to someone that’s not Harry, and the universe has decided to have a laugh and make Harry the wedding planner.)

🎆This Feeling orphan_account (58k) | Explicit

“Gonna play it back for you now.” Louis clicked play and the song flooded through Harry’s headphones.

The sound of each others voices united into one, and the rhythm of the music carried their voices effortlessly. Harry’s insides tingled and a wave of shivers rolled down his spine.

Before the clip cut off, Harry turned to raise an eyebrow at Louis, and failed miserably at disguising his smile. Louis stared back at him in shock.

Or A Larry Duet AU

🎆The Night Sky is Changing Overhead orphan_account (124k) | Explicit

“Um, sorry, but I believe that’s actually mine,” Harry said a bit awkwardly, pointing at the cup.

The man huffed, slightly narrowing his blue eyes, “Nope, large Americano, dash of cream.” He held the coffee up closer to Harry and honestly, Harry knew exactly what was in the cup because it was his coffee.

“Right,” Harry slowly drawled out as if he was talking to a toddler, “Which would make that mine.”

“Look, I really don’t have time for this, I’m running late. And this,” he said before he took a sip from the cup, “Is mine.”

Harry’s jaw dropped and he held his hands out, failing them slightly, “Wha-you can’t just drink it!”

“Well I did, so, do you still want it or can I be on my way?” The man challenged.

Harry shook his head disbelievingly, “Take it, but for the record, it says Harry on it.”

The man turned the cup around and a sharp laugh came out of his mouth, “Well, shit.” He looked at Harry, a smile stretched across his face as crinkles formed next to his eyes. “Thanks, Harry.”

🎆The Arrangement by @daddyy_harryy, @HyFrLarry1224 (218k) | Mature

Louis knew it was his time. Once anyone turned 13, they were watched. And when they were 16 it could be any time. Anytime they could be taken. It was just weeks after his 16th birthday and there he was, sitting in the back of the van.

Or

Louis is forced to marry Harry and bear his children. He is to listen to Harry and do as he says, no matter what. Speaking is a given, and freedom doesn’t exist. Will the sixteen year old boy find himself falling in love with the Leader of the British Mafia? Or will he find himself stuck in a place he doesn’t want to be, with an abusive asshole for a husband?

🎆Something in the World Today by @whoknows(48k) | Explicit

It shouldn’t be a surprise, the first time that Louis drops to his knees in front of Harry. It shouldn’t be, because it’s been something that Louis has needed for a long time. It shouldn’t be, because he’s been crawling out of his skin for weeks on end. It shouldn’t be, because Harry always makes him feel better. It shouldn’t be, because he’s needed this even when he didn’t know that he needed it.

Somehow, it still is.

🎆I Cannot Dream Tonight Series by @afangirlfantasy (50k) | Not Rated

At 16 years old, everyone takes a compatibility test on their birthday. At some point after taking the test, and along with other data collected, everyone finds out if they are a Dom or Sub.

At 17 years old, everyone receives a bracelet that notifies them when they have been matched. Every Dom needs a Sub. Every Sub needs a Dom.

When Louis’ bracelet lights up weeks after getting it, let’s just say that who he is matched with, is not quite what he had been expecting.

🎆Don’t Waste Your Time On Me, You’re Already The Voice Inside My Head by @afangirlfantasy (28k) | Not Rated

At 16 years old, everyone takes a compatibility test on their birthday. At some point after taking the test, and along with other data collected, everyone finds out if they are a Dom or Sub.

🎆His Submission Series by tonystankyall (orphan_account) (152k) | Mature

Louis Tomlinson lives in a world where Domination and Submission is a norm. When you are born you are either branded Sub or Dom. Subs get a little pink or blue, depeneding on gender, series of swirls on the back of their neck. Doms get Red or Black, depending on gender, series of swirls on the back of their neck.

Louis Tomlinson was branded with a Blue tattoo and his day has finally come. The day of his 18th birthday where he will be randomly assigned a Dom. This dom could range from younger to older, poorer to richer, and male to female. You never knew what you were going to get. Some Doms were more harsher and stricter than others. Louis didn’t want a harsh Dom to submit to.

Harry Styles was branded with a Black tattoo and he just recieved in the mail that he was finally getting a submissive. Harry was a 32 year old man, settled in, and very very rich. He’s been waiting for an assigned submissive to be chosen for him for a very long time. His Dom friend, Zayn, has gotten his submissive two years prior, a little spit fire irish boy, Niall.

*The rest is in the note*

At 17 years old, everyone receives a bracelet that notifies them when they have been matched. Every Dom needs a Sub. Every Sub needs a Dom.

When Louis’ bracelet lights up weeks after getting it, let’s just say that who he is matched with, is not quite what he had been expecting.

🎆driving instructor fic by @LoadedGunn (104k) | Explicit

AU where Louis is a 25-year-old driving instructor and Harry is a 17-year-old virgin who’s really awful at seduction, except for the time he gets Louis to fall for him and fuck him senseless and take him on kinky adventures.

🎆Loving You Is Free by @littlelouishiccups (91k) | Explicit

Louis is a workaholic record label CEO who hasn’t been on a date in nearly a year. Niall and Liam make an account for him on a sugar dating website as a joke. And then Louis meets Harry.

🎆sex shop fic (dildornado ‘verse) by @istajmaal, @LoadedGunn (96k) | Explicit

AU where Louis is the most helpful sex shop salesperson in the history of sex shops, and Harry really was just looking for a vibrator with simple instructions (yet ended up getting a hands-on demonstration).

🎆welcome to the mansion by @blankiehxrry (7k) | Explicit

Harry is a Playboy bunny.

🎆Wild and Rain by @softandslow (45k) | Explicit

Louis has been looking after Tessa since he was sixteen. Harry’s a man in a business suit who has loved his daughter’s babysitter for three whole years.

🎆A Million Years by @sunflowerstyles (3k) | Explicit

Louis always ends up feeling guilty that he’s not ready to give Harry what he wants. Harry shows him how much fun they can have while they wait together.

🎆Can’t help but touch myself by @Tita (7k) | Explicit

“I asked what these were, love.” Harry gulps. “Panties,” he explains with heated cheeks, needing more than the light touches from Louis and getting nothing. “What did you get them for? Were they to impress someone else?” He asks, and Harry shakes his head fervently, stumbling over his words as he tries to get his tongue to cooperate. “No, no,” he emphasizes, arching his back to plaster himself to Louis. “For you, always for you, Daddy.”

🎆Champagne by @fanshae (2k) | Explicit

“Look at how pretty you are,” Louis murmurs, Harry’s stockinged toes curling against the floor at the praise, “Give Daddy a twirl, baby.”

🎆connoisseurs of comfort by @sky_reid (45k) | Explicit

louis has only really had his flat to himself for a few weeks when liam knocks on the door and brings him a new flatmate. this one turns out to be a bit different though.

🎆Dance Floor Whore by @ropewithnoanchor (7k) | Explicit

Louis and Harry go to a club while on tour to blow off some steam, but Harry gets too drunk and lets another man dance up on him in front of everyone. Louis takes him back to their hotel and spends the next morning punishing Harry, making Harry work to make it up to him.

🎆Give It Up To Me by @krisstylinson (8k) | Explicit

“You’re going to end up making me come with all the boys in our lounge,” he finished, his tone softening the longer he spoke.

“And?” Harry murmured, placing his palm over the crevice of Louis’ arse, keeping the plug nice and tight inside of him. “What if I wanted you to?”

Or the cliché where Louis isn’t supposed to come but he does, and that can’t go unpunished in Harry’s eyes.

🎆just want to make love to you by @beautlouis (3k) | Explicit

Louis has a lapful of Harry before the car has even closed and maybe he should be a bit concerned about that, judging from the look in Liam’s eye, but it’s hard to worry about anything when Harry’s wriggling against him, warm and insistent.

“’m so hard,” Harry pants against his ear, “Been this way since we got off the stage, want–want you to fuck me, yeah, I want–”

*the aftermath of the xfactor performance where harry went wild

🎆my one and own (i wanna get you alone) by @beautlouis (6k) | Explicit

Louis’ favorite thing to do is make Harry come. It’s the best feeling in the world, watching the boy he loves fall apart underneath him; to see how good it feels for Harry, in every line and movement of his body.

Louis pushes a thigh between Harry’s and grinds just enough that Harry sighs gently and ruts his hips back into Louis. Holding Harry’s waist firmly, Louis presses his lips into Harry’s ear and says, “I think I’d like to make you come.”

It isn’t as if they don’t both know that’s what tonight is—Louis making Harry come—but the verbal acknowledgment of it makes Harry moan sharply and turn his head to try to pull Louis into a kiss.

🎆Push You Over The Edge (So I Can Pull You Back) by orphan_account (16k) | Explicit

It’s after a long two weeks of interviews and non-stop appearances that have got Harry stressed to the limit of yanking his hair out and throwing a fit and crying that Louis shows it to him, walks in the door with a sleek black bag in his left hand and inconspicuous brown one in his right.

🎆To Be Loved To Be In Love by @Angel_Dust (129k) | Mature

At 18, every Sub must take a Match Test to find their Dom.

Poor, Farm kid Louis Tomlinson is matched with Rich, Businessman Harry Styles.

Or, where Harry thinks giving Money, expensive presents and luxuries proves how much you love someone, but Louis is about to turn his world upside down.

🎆Wake Me Up by @larrystylins (2k) | Explicit

Harry stretches and accidentally pushes his bare bum into Louis’ crotch. Oh. That’s definitely Louis’ cock. Okay that’s definitely the outline of Louis’ hard cock pressing against him. “Lou?” he whispers. Of course Louis is fast asleep..

or Harry wakes up to Louis’ morning wood pressed against his bum. Harry gets needy. Louis wakes up and punishes him.

🎆You Don’t Need Me To Show The Way by @LoadedGunn (6k) | Explicit

But right there, on Harry’s iPod, is a folder entitled Lou Sappy Sappy Long Indie Hipster 80’s Love Songs Mixtape.

Louis expects a sappy mix tape. He might even expect his own shitty versions of Foo Fighter songs. What he doesn’t expect is clicking on “AUD-20101223” and suddenly hearing loud moaning. He gasps and scrambles to pause it, so shocked the iPod drops right to Harry’s stomach. Harry looks absolutely mortified, even more than he did when Louis played High School Musical. He’s blushing so furiously his face bypassed rosy straight to flaming red, and his mouth is closing and opening like he can’t think of a single thing to say.

Then Louis starts laughing uproariously. “Hiiii, I’m Harry from Cheshire, when I’m on the road I like listening to indie music and gay porn.”

Or, 2011 fic where Harry rides dick for the first time and Louis appreciates technology.

✨You can also check My Fic Tags for more fics! ✨

[musebluebird]

"Stop, you're going to hurt yourself pulling like that." He sighed. Despite his anger at her at the moment, Aiden walked over and stood in front of her to help her with the hairpins. His fingertips ran through her hair, removing the hairpins one by one. It was infuriating the way he wanted to fight her but he also wanted to help her. His inside was fucking confusing at that moment.

"I'm not your enemy, Phoebe, the sooner you realize that, the better." He remembered the clear annoyance in her voice "And if I have to tell you that I don't give a shit what your father thinks then you don't know me as well as I thought you did." Aiden didn't think it was even necessary to tell her that her father wasn't exactly the person in his highest esteem. The man was an idiot, plain and simple. That night her father had been particularly happy and Aiden hadn't liked one bit that the man was so happy about something that involved him and that made his own daughter that miserable.

She was definitely 'in a mood' because she seemed to be taking everything that came out of his mouth personally. That wasn't even close to what he had meant. How did she find a way to turn his words around all the time? "I said 'liked' not because I don't like you now anymore but because I would have chosen to marry you anyway." That was a confession Aiden had no intention of blurting out just like that but it was the honest truth. He would have chosen Phoebe every time. On the one hand cause she knew him and he knew her and he knew she didn't have a head full of air, but mainly he would have chosen her because the day he met her, Phoebe had seemed to him the prettiest girl in the room even before finding out who she was related to. Aiden would have asked her out if it wasn't because he chickened out after finding out who her brothers were. Dating your friend's sister was definitely off limits them. He was happy tho he didn't ask her out back then cause he was an idiot when he was at college "Because if I have to be honest it's better that it's you than any other heiress, Phoebe"

Aiden finished taking the hairpins off her hair and left them aside on the table "And I'm not relaxed at all but I'm trying to be an adult about it because I guess one of us has to be" He quickly regretted his words. Phoebe was going through a rough time and all he was doing was yelling at her. Her fiance died and now she was marrying someone that she not only didn't want to marry but was there almost as a replacement for her original fiance. To make matters worse Aiden was friends with her brothers and she was probably expecting him to tell them everything she did just like she accused him of selling her off to her dad a moment ago. The whole situation was fucked up. Aiden probably needed some more subtlety than starting that marriage by fighting with his wife. "I'm sorry, that was rude, I know you're under a lot of stress and it sucks that they forced you to marry someone else in such a short time." He sighed. "Not my best night either, I admit, I should cut you some slack, sorry."

The car ride was quiet - all she heard was the quiet hum of the car's ac as they were driven back to his apartment. Phoebe kept her gaze focused on the window, because after her comments at the reception, he didn't say much else. Understandably so. Part of her understood that this wasn't his fault. It wasn't anyone's fault really. It had been an accident, something that could happen to anyone. At least, that's what she was told. But, the other part of her dominated. The part that was irritated by her father's quick action, and to some extent, Aiden's willingness to jump into this arrangement. Phoebe Grey wasn't oblivious to her future and what it held, but could anyone understand that this was simply too much change in a three month period? All in all, her feelings were just all over the place. Sad, upset, then back again. At least, only he took notice of her sour mood. Everyone else, including her parents, praised the wedding and commented how happy they both looked. Everyone rejoiced at the growing strength of the Grey-Carter family.

Entering his apartment was a surreal feeling. It was like the reality was setting in, they were married. Home was no longer her childhood home or the apartment with the loud neighbors. Home was now Aiden's apartment, and she knew she didn't even need to ask - all her things were now here. She was thankful to be out of the bulky wedding dress, and now just in the reception dress. It made this just slightly less awkward. "Your nickname sucks," she commented with a sigh, as she began pulling the hairpins holding her current hairstyle. She held the hairpins in her hand, finding it easier to stare at those than look up at him. "You make it sound like I'm just grumpy the baker got our cake flavor wrong." Right, the bright side was that - at least she married him. Despite losing her previous fiance, she still landed a catch like Aiden. The thought almost made her roll her eyes. "It's semi-comforting. Anyone else would've probably snitched to my dad already, that I'm being difficult." Maybe, they were friends, but Phoebe got the message the more he spoke. Get with the program, leave her past behind, and don't make this marriage harder than it needs to be. She wished it was that easy to bring her cheerful self back, like flipping a switch. "Though, with your thin patience, you probably will tell him eventually."

Her brown eyes peered up at him for the second time that night. The first time was as they exchanged the 'I do' that sealed the deal. "You liked me?" The past tense did not go unnoticed by her. "Not anymore then," she mumbled, mostly to herself. Another friend she had was lost. What a start to this marriage. Coming to terms, easier said than done. “I know it’s not an option, you don’t need to remind me. How do you do it though? How are you so…laid back about all of this?” Now, it was her turn to scoff. “You don’t want us to be miserable, but you married someone without really having a choice? At best, we’ll be good friends. How is that not a recipe for disaster?” Wasn’t that insane? Not really, not in their world anyway. Perhaps, Phoebe had been a bit more idealistic than she wanted to admit - still hopeful to somehow marry and find love.