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dammitadolfnomorecake · 2 years ago

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**Cultivating Love**54**

**Keith Returns**

A fox’s work was never done. Not even with the help of Shay, and little Shiro. Mounds of paperwork had accumulated upon Shiro’s desk, Lance annoyed that someone hadn’t thought to take it away when Shiro had left the palace, then thought to stop adding to it. Despite Keith being in the demon realm, a ceremony was held to commemorate Shiro and their lost cultivators thanks to Zarkon’s attack. Everyone seemed to grieve the loss of Shiro, expressing their condolences before trying to push the rank of master on him. Lance could not be bothered. When the time of night came he’d climb into Keith’s bed, taking comfort from being in Keith’s space, and extra comfort from the blankets that had once adorned Shiro’s bed.

Little Shiro was thriving. Everyday Shay brought up the milk for him, then would sit with him as Lance got ready for the day. Hunk had it lucky. Hibernating meant no issues to deal with and no one to hide from. Lance had received plenty of filthy looks from members of the palace staff, yet he wasn’t going to run away. He’d come full circle back to where he’d started and if they liked to talk about him, they could. They might not know the truth, and rely upon rumours from the lack of information, yet he found himself not bothered by their small minds, not when compared to how his heart felt after sorting Shiro’s things.

Still, a month without Keith was proving to wear thin on Lance’s patience. His elder sister Veronica had sent such a sternly worded letter to him that he’d nearly channelled Keith’s temper and burned it on the spot. Then there was the upcoming lotus festival to organise. The rereshuffling of Shiro’s duties. The reshuffling of Hunk’s now that he had returned, yet he was hibernating and could not attend to the work the other masters had organised for him to complete. There were letters to write not only to Coran, but to his family, Allura’s father, numerous clan leaders, and to those who needed cultivators sent out to deal with the loosening of problem matrixes. Children wanted his attention. Lance wanted to join the classes where the dances were being taught and could not due to his duties, plus before all that he had to put little Shiro first. The only time he truly could have peace was when he was bathing with little Shiro. Even then that involved sneaking in when no one else was bathing then sealing the doors for the duration he was in there. That was also pretty much the only time he could speak to Keith without them being called away, though now it fell to him to contact Keith as his schedule was too full to be able to talk to his mate as he pleased. From what Lance had been told Honerva was in hiding and, due to the failed attempt to summon it into the realm, the Gladiatorial arena complex had taken substantial damage. Lotor was also missing. Assumed to have also gone to ground with his closest advisors. It seemed at this rate Keith would never be able to come back home and he’d seemed somewhat distant when he’d told Lance he’d be unable to call for at least week due to the situation. A whole week meant a month for Keith. A month that scared Lance despite acknowledging it was what it was. Any hopes of seeing Keith shortly seemed dashed and his mood had taken a definite downturn due to it.

Gathering little Shiro into his arms, Lance had had enough of the palace. Climbing off the balcony, then making his way down the lilac tree, he’d finally snapped, packing lightly for a days trip for the two of them. Keith was now officially over due. No contact for a week, followed by changes to the upcoming lotus festival had proven too much. With little Shiro tied to his chest, Lance made his escape into the chaos of the festival.

Thanks to the festival people were coming and going more easily than normal. No one was around to pay close attention as Lance left the palace gates and made his way into the valley of medicinal herbs. He’d missed the valley. He’d missed water deer that looked like water deer and the way the sun shone off the small river running through the space. Other cultivators were collecting herbs, so he kept away from them, taking up a seat next to the river as little Shiro began to protest the great outdoors.

Little Shiro was a good baby. He was fussy for sure, but he was curious too. He loved his sleep, loved bath time, and hated being groomed. Kind of like Keith despite their being no blood relation there. Sitting little Shiro in his crossed legs, Lance pulled out the few things he’d brought. Keith wouldn’t be able to carve a lantern for the festival, and while Lance had hoped the three of them might carve one for little Shiro’s first festival, there he was alone with their little boy. Shiro might not have been able to carve anything and was far too small for knife, but Lance still wanted to have him help. The lanterns he’d made last time were at Allura’s. Coran had offered to deliver them personally, giving Lance the strong suspicion the man felt lost without Allura. He’d told Coran not to bother until Keith had returned, yet he didn’t know if he’d be listened to seeing Coran did have a perfectly valid reason for coming to the palace in the form of the festival.

Placing down the paper, he picked up the bamboo cut off where the floating candle would be housed. Yet again he’d be carving lanterns for both Shiro and Keith. Had he had time he’d liked to have carved one for the memory in the memory of Shiro, but that sadly wasn’t the case. Instead he’d decided that upon Shiro’s birthday he’d carve one with extra special care to remember the man whom he’d loved and lost.

Losing himself in the manual labour of carving. When little Shiro started crying, Lance finally placed down the bamboo holder. If his son was to be believed it was now lunch time, and he’d soon be angry if he didn’t get his milk. Lance found him as aggressive as he was adorable when he wanted his milk. His tail would flick back and forth and the scowl on his face as he wailed was simply precious. Organising little Shiro’s lunch, he settled him to feed as he bit down on his divine peach for the day. Juice dribbling from the ripe fruit to his little Shiro’s left check, the babe seeming to glare up as him as Lance laughed. Taking on plenty of pure energy and the effects of the peach were working wonders on his soul. He no longer tired as he did, or as he remembered, despite falling into bed each night and cursing the sun for rising too early.

Seeing a shadow cast over them, Lance raised his head. For a moment he’d foolishly gotten his hopes up that Keith had magically appeared, yet it was only Shay with an umbrella to ward against the sun

“You could have told someone you were coming here. I’ve been hunting for you. The masters are all up in arms”

Whoops. Somehow he didn’t feel guilty in the slightest. Holding the peach up, he joked

“Want some? It’s simply divine”

Shay closed her eyes and let out a long breath before opening them

“No. I don’t want your half eaten food, I want you to come back and do your work… oh”

Looking from him to his half finished lantern then back, Shay cut her own sentence off. Lance much preferred her bossing him around, even if she had found the time to finish her own lantern for the festival

“It’s fine. Little Shiro was helping me make his first lantern. What are those old coots mad about now?”

“A merchants horse threw a shoe and an apprentice was kicked when they tried to measure for the new shoe. Apparently thing would run much smoother if you were there”

That sounded like an excuse to him. What they wanted was Shiro. Not his two for one replacements

“I can’t magic up a new shoe. I’m having a day off. I decided it this morning when thinking about all the paperwork waiting for me”

“You still haven’t heard word?”

“No, and he’s overdue. He said it’d be one week with no contact, yet it’s been ten days now. The festival starts next week…”

“I’m sure he’ll be okay. After the adventure you went on with Pidge, she’d never let him be hurt even if she had to kill him herself to stop it”

Funnily, Shay did not make him feel better. The rebel base had been attacked in their absence. Things were a mess, yet Krolia had gone on television to announce there would be changes and some of her comrades had come to join the group. Lowering the offered peach, Lance looked back to little Shiro

“I know that. I know and I still worry. With Hunk hibernating, someone has to”

“Then you can take him. His snoring is driving me mad”

“If it’s really that bad I will, yet I have the funny feeling you’d be lost without him. Can I finish my lantern first?”

“Will you take all day?”

“Most probably”

Shay sighed deeply before giving up

“Alright. For today. And only because I know you have been working yourself to the point of exhaustion to please the other masters”

“It’s a good way to ensure a solid sleep. Thank you, Shay. I know you job is not to assist me, and I know you do it as a friend, so thank you for helping me so much. I truly appreciate it”

“If you appreciate it that much, please leave a note next time”

“And risk the masters finding it? I think not. I’ll be okay. I’m choosing to believe that if something major had happened news would have sent, one way or another”

“I’m sure it would be. Take the umbrella. Too much sun won’t be good for your son”

“Thank you. He seems content like this. Though he did object to peach juice”

Shay kicked him lightly with her right boot

“You’re not supposed to be giving him peach! He’s a babe in arms, not a toddler”

“I know, I know, it was quite by accident. You are welcome to join us if you’d like”

“No, no. I have things to do. Masters to lie to and all that. I will be checking up on you though and I expect to find you back for dinner”

“I’ll try”

“No, you will be. Hunk will worry far too much should he wake and you be ill again”

“We can’t have that. Now, if you are sure I cannot tempt you, then you should head back. Little Shiro and I will be perfectly fine here”

“Alright. Make sure you’re careful coming back lest the masters find you. Good luck with your lantern. I’m sure Keith will be back in time to see it”

Lance wasn’t sure at all. He’d thought the timing for the yearly lotus festival had already happened, yet with all going on, it seemed he’d miscalculated somewhere along the way and now had much to do that involved distraction from Keith

“I will. Thank you, Shay”

Taking that whole day to himself and little Shiro, Lance resumed his place and worked as hard as he could on the festival. The masters hadn’t taken kindly to his slacking off, shoving all the small and awkward jobs upon him. His lantern wasn’t entirely up to his normal standards, yet he’d blame little Shiro’s unskilled hands for the small mistakes. Right up to the day of the festival he still held hope that Keith would be there. The mirror upon his desk mocking him in final moments of getting ready by remaining silent.

Dressed in red robes, rather than his favoured blue, little Shiro was dressed in white, as cute as any doll sold in the stores of the demon world. Joining him was Shay, dressed in yellow and white, the same colours as her lantern for that year. It was only for her that Lance was attending the festival. She seemed to know without words that he’d changed his mind about the whole thing given his precious mate was not there.

Arm in arm, many complimented them on their child, until they saw that he was clearly white wolf and not human or fox. Shay’s quick wit coming up with a different story for each stranger that paused too long to stare. Parting once they’d placed their lanterns, Lance sorely wished to skip his favourite part. All the love and wishes wouldn’t bring Keith home any sooner. Little Shiro having his ear talked off about his wayward father seeing he made a great listener and wouldn’t remember their talks as he aged.

Making his way to the first bridge, Lance found a spot on it, sitting little Shiro in the railing while supporting him, so he too could see the lanterns. As usual they were spectacular. Everyone who had their special partners were with them. The love pouring out and filling the festival with happiness and joy and hope. Shiro should have been there and so should have Keith. Hunk should be with Shay… and Matt with whomever he’d wooed this time. Slowly the lanterns would make their way downstream to a point, then would be raised upon the winds if the carver and their intended wished. That way what looked like a rainbow of stars would bring an end to the night as lovers and families took things indoor.

Pranged with the guilt and sorrow over the lanterns he’d gifted both Shiro and Keith, and that he hadn’t been there with them for the festival, Lance turned, scooping little Shiro back up. If nothing, his journey had taught him well that there were things that he’d never be able to surmount or handle, and sometimes acceptance wasn’t cowardice but strength. With brisk steps he hurried down the slight slope of the bridge, trying not to let his mood affect those around him.

When he was suddenly caught by the arm, Lance flinched back as he was forcibly spun by the stranger. Some form a ridiculous mask covered their face, and Lance needed a whole moment to process what was happening. Paws reached up to scratch at his skin, as the mask was lifted. A very dishevelled Keith stood before him. His robes and hair were muddy. Twigs and leaves caught in Keith’s long locks. Without a second thought he was crashing into Keith, little Shiro narrowly being avoided being squashed between his two fathers. Even Keith’s lips tasted of mud, but it was the best kiss of Lance’s life to date. Breaking the kiss, and in a state of shock, Lance stared right at Keith’s features. Keith breaking the spell by asking

“I’m not too late right? I’m still in time for the lanterns?”

Who cared about lanterns when their lover had suddenly appeared? Only Pidge could cast such a convincing illusion, but she never could give the same breath of chi to those whom she copied

“No… no, you’re on time… what? How? Why are you so muddied?”

“I swore to you a month, then broke that promise by neglecting travel time”

There was something in Keith’s puffy huff that Lance recognised all too well

“You got lost again, didn’t you?”

Keith’s ears flicked. Lance unable to stop smiling in wonder of the man before him

“You could at least suggest I took the more scenic route, to which the answer would be yes. Or play along and agree the palace has moved location. Is that our little Shiro? He’s grown”

Right. Little Shiro. Little Shiro’s first lantern.

Taking Keith by the hand, Lance led him back to the bridge. His own lantern sat towards the back, very nearly missed as they floated along

“You made me a lantern?”

Now Lance huffed. Keith didn’t need to sound so shocked, Lance turning from him

“Of course we did. It’s our boy’s first festival. He kept me good company, unlike you”

Taking him by the shoulder, Keith turned him back easily

“I am sorry. I was sure if I called from this realm you would know what I had planned. I’ve left the mirror in the hands of Krolia”

“10 days, Keith. It’s a six day ride”

“Then you should be happier it didn’t take me two weeks”

“Happier? I’ve been worried out of my mind. Overworked. Bullied. And now bullied by my mate. And what is that mask you’re wearing?”

Sheepishly Keith removed the mask. Whoever had carved it had done a pretty poor job and if he were Keith he would have demanded a refund

“It’s a fox, obviously. I carved it myself”

Keith sounded so proud that Lance swallowed down his complaints

“Yes, well, you’re not a master carver but now I can see it”

“If you don’t want it, I can burn it”

“It’s for me?”

“I tried to make you a new one. I know you’re sad over your last one getting burned”

Lance blushed. He wouldn’t like to meet the poor deformed creature the mask resembled, not with its wonky ears and malformed nose

“You’re such a fool”

“And your tail is going back forth as you try to deflect. I can burn it”

Keith sounded wounded, Lance not having it.

“No. You’ll hand it over. You’re not allowed to go about burning my things… Look, there’s the lantern little Shiro helped me with”

Keith obliged and leaned right over to watch the lantern disappear under the bridge, but didn’t hand over the mask. Now Lance would have to steal it and hide it away for its own safety. Coming back up, Keith smiled at him. Lance proceeded to blush harder and didn’t need Keith pointing out the obvious

“I can feel it. You love me a lot”

“Obviously. You’ve seen our lantern now, let’s go somewhere more private”

Keith slapped him lightly on the arm with the back of his hand

“Not in front of our son. Besides, you love the festival and you love the lanterns”

“I love you a whole lot more… plus, you need a bath”

Keith chuckled, wrapping his arms around Lance and little Shiro

“Any excuse to get me out of my robes”

“I’m not going to deny it”

“What am I going to do with you?”

“Love me for the rest of our days…?”

“I think I can do that. Hey, Lance, I’m home”

Lance patted Keith’s arm

“You are. Tomorrow I want the full report of your trip, but for tonight, my everything hungers to be yours”

“I think I can make that happen”

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kiwibirbs-library · 4 years ago

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Nightmares

a/n: so like.. uhh... how’s your day? Cause mine said work and think of this babe the whole time. Oh you too? Cool cool.

YALL THIS IS AFTER I WROTE THIS ITS SO LONG OMG OK I NEED TO GO READ THROUGH WOW

Pairing: Keith kogane x reader

Warning: uhh nightmares ya ya that. That’s it

Summary: you get nightmares, fairly bad done at that. And one night you just can’t do it anymore and go to the nearest occupied room. And suddenly it becomes a tradition.

You were rescued from a prison break. The only thing that made you special was that your entire planet was massacred and you had absolutely nowhere to go.

That was almost 6 months ago.

That’s how you ended up where you are now. In a near empty room of the castle, trying to fall back asleep. This was the fifth time you had a nightmare this week. This was the fifth time you had had to relive the vivid torture. The fifth time you’ve been curled up in a ball, tears streaming, trying to just breath through it.

After about 10 minutes you sat up. You couldn’t keep doing this. You couldn’t keep going off of two hours of sleep. You really couldn’t keep hearing Shiros ‘you ok?’ Every morning when you showed up looking like the living dead.

You grabbed your blanket and wrapped it around yourself before waking to the door. The faded walking lights were enough to keep you from hitting anything as you stopped at the nearest door. Hopefully it was someone who could help you. Just to talk to if you could. In other words— as much as you enjoy him— not Lance. You gulped as you knocked on the door. You weren’t expecting it to open as soon as it did.

Keith stood in the open door way, rubbing an eyes slightly as his vision adjusted to see you clearly.

“Y/n?” His voice was raspy from not talking for a while.

“Um hi,” your voice broke in the middle. His brows furrowed as he noticed your stained cheeks and red nose.

“Are you ok?” He squinted at you a bit, still not completely able to see you.

“Uh actually could I um... stay here for a bit.... please,” it all came out whimpery and cracked. You felt kind of pathetic. You half expected him to tell you where Shiro was and go back to sleep with how long he took to respond. But no. He backed up a bit and gave you room to come in. You smiled a little up to him and shuffled in. He sat on his bed and watched you slightly as you made your way down to the floor.

He didn’t exactly know why but he didn’t like the idea of you laying there. It was clean sure, and he definitely would have let anyone else sleep there, but he couldn’t in good conscious just leave you there. Especially with how red and wet your face was when you passed him. He cleared his throat a bit and you looked up at him from your spot. He patted the mattress beside him and you got the idea, getting up and sitting next to him.

“So... what’s wrong?” He looked at your hands as they twisted into each other. You bit your lip.

“Um well, lately I’ve been having these.. um... nightmares. There of the time in the prison. And the um... things that happened,” you gulped. There was a slight pause.

“You don’t have to force yourself to talk if you can’t,” Keith sighed a bit. You looked over to him to find a surprising look of worry on his face. You were taken aback by how understanding he looked. From what you knew of him he was that loner of the group, the one that didn’t talk much and did his own thing, only worrying about himself (and Shiro as you observed). But sitting next to you wasn’t someone that didn’t know feelings of others. It was more like someone who could understand what was happening with you.

“I get nightmares too you know. Of course I’ve never been tortured like you or Shiro were, but they still get to me pretty bad,” he said bluntly, leaning back on his hands. You sighed and brought you knees to your chest, a tired look in your eyes. “You can go to sleep if you want, it would be good for you,” he said without looking at you.

“Thank you,” you smiled a little. “You know, your a lot nicer than I thought you would be one on one,” you laid down slowly.

“I’ll take that as a complement?” His words had the slightest sound of amusement with them. It brought a calming blanket down on you.

In no time your were completely knocked out, Keith leaning up against the wall, also falling asleep as he made sure you didn’t wake up.

~~~~

There was a vibrating from under your head, waking you up. You weren’t fully awake as you felt the air on your skin without opening your eyes. You felt something come underneath the pillow and stop the movement before leaving. Your brows furrowed slightly as you moved even closer to wherever the thing had come from. Without moving much you hit something, immediately running a hand down the back of it before falling back to sleep.

Keith was also awakened by a vibrating. More than you obviously as this was his alarm every morning. So when he turned it off to keep you to sleep and you moved closer he very much noticed. And then your hand ran down his back and made him shiver. He was a blushing mess. He couldn’t even say anything as you stuffed your face into his chest and stayed asleep. Without even knowing it he was smiling at you, moving some hair from your face before he thought about it. You pushed yourself forward a little more, turning him onto his back as you used him as a body pillow. For the first time in a while he had to hold back a laugh at the movement.

You both stayed like that for almost an hour before you groggily got up finally. When you saw the position you immediately started apologizing for what happened. He waved you off, his normal stern face back as he sat up and met you in the middle of the room.

“Calm down its fine, I don’t really care. Anyways we should leave, we’re about to have the morning meeting,” as if the castle could hear him the intercom turned on with a loud beep and Alluras voice came on.

“Meeting time! Hunk made food as well,” and she was gone. You smiled at the idea of Hunks cooking.

“Oh shoot I need to change,” you looked down to your pajamas.

“Meh Lance Never does don’t worry about it,” in truth Keith was just stalling to continue seeing you in them. He really didn’t understand why but he liked the sight. You both left his room before walking the halls to kitchen. Mostly everyone was there, the only one not was Lance unsurprisingly. You waved a bit as you took a seat next to Pidge, Keith to you. They looked at you both with a smile before going back into their talk about something technical.

You tried to listen as you ate but your thoughts drifted to the night before and this morning. A light pink hit your face at the thought. You smiled a little as you put the spoon to you mouth.

~~~~

These sleepovers quickly became something usual. In some instances you wouldn’t even go back to your room, just straight to his with him. At one point he told you to bring some clothes over to change so now you had your little pile in the corner of dresses and shirts. The most awkward part of it would have to when you both began cuddling consciously. You felt hot as Keith put a very hesitant arm on you, his constant ‘is this ok?’s making you laugh a bit.

You didn’t know when but at some point you started taking the sessions in for more. You would always smile at the thought of Keith. Your eyes would always wonder the room in search of him. If the found his you would gaze for a moment before looking away.

Keith knew exactly when he took after hours for more. He knew exactly what he was doing when went to his room at the end of the night, waiting impatiently for you to show up. He knew exactly what he wanted when he asked you to bring some clothes over, his idea for you to spend more time there working amazingly.

The day you got found out though was the most embarrassing moment of your life. Even worse than Pidge calling you out for staring at the boy. For one thing you were more tired than usual that morning due to training the previous day. So while reaching for a pair of leggings you missed and grabbed Keith’s spare sweatpants. Honestly you didn’t even think about how big they were as you threw on your jacket and left. Keith had left before you to meet with Shiro so you were alone and the first in the breakfast hall. By the time you stood up everyone was there as well. Keith’s hand flew to his face to hide the bright red that flushed his face when he noticed. He wasn’t going to say anything, he didn’t really want to. He would have to resist the urge to hide your normal pjs in favor of you wearing his for the next week.

“Aren’t those a little big on you?” Pidge commented.

“Huh?” You looked down and blushed a bit at the clothing. “O-oh ya, haha. Um i saw them at the mall we went to the other day and picked them up,” you coughed.

“Wow really those look like what Keith was wea—“ Lances mouth was covered and his head was dragged down by Keith’s arms. Everyone looked between you two with skeptical look before you slip out the door with a ‘well then’.

That was the catalyst of Lance following Keith to his room and hour later. He was droning on about something when Keith stopped in front of his door. He never had time to clean up this morning. Your clothes were probably still scattered in different areas. He cleared his throat.

“What?” He looked to Lance you was waiting patiently for the door to open.

“Oh I wanted to see what your room looked like. I’m bored and have nothing to do today,” he gave a dramatic sigh. Keith blocked the door.

“No.”

“Whaaat?? Why nooooott? How long have we known each other? Shouldn’t we have more trust????” Lance whined. “Besides whaaat Y/n in here the other day?”

“No,” Keith stayed. Then you came down the hall. You had went to your room in search of a pair of pants before realizing they were still sitting on the edge of Keith’s dresser. Maybe your other jacket was still on his bed if you were lucky. When you saw Lance you made a turn to leave the way you came too late.

“Y/n?” Lance called. You stopped and turned back to him.

“Hey Lance, what’s up?” You smiled a bit and walked a little closer. Keith was happy to hear your voice but also bit his lip at the predicament. You were probably looking for your favorite leggings. The ones you left here the other night. Bad timing.

“Oh I was wanting to see inside Keith’s room! What about you?” You continued talking to Lance, at one point giving Keith a side glance to say to go in. He quickly slipped into his room and started picking up your things and hastily putting it places, most went under his bed. In all honesty he didn’t mind too much about everyone finding out about your sleepovers. He did mind however about the teasing that would come with it.

The door clicked and slid open, Lance walked in with a nervous you glancing around after him.

“Wow it’s so boring in here,” Lance sighed, draping himself over on top of you. “There’s nothing in here how do you live like thi—“ he stopped when he looked over the floor. He saw something light blue poking out from under the bed. Keith tensed when lance moved it out with his foot. The jacket dragged out a few more clothes with it, all definitely not Keith’s and very obviously yours.

“Y/n did you know your clothes are— OH MY GOD NO WAY!!” He jumped away from you and looked between you and the mullet boy. “YOU TWO ARE A THINGGG??”

“No no we’re not!” You held up your hands and tried to explain. You missed Keith’s small and inaudible ’yet’.

“Then why are your clothes here? Are there more?!” Lance asked, gesturing to the small pile on the floor.

“Um well, sleepovers?” You rubbed your hands together. Lance turned to Keith.

“What does that mean?”

“Well what do you think a sleepover means? Honestly,” he crossed his arms. Lance turned back to you.

“How many times??”

“Ah ha ha um... multiple?” You looked over to Keith to find he was already watching you. You whipped back to Lance. As if the universe told you you weren’t getting out of this easy, Pidge and Hunk passed by the open door. They peered in a you heard a little laugh.

“He finally figured it out? Hah we knew weeks ago,” the small girl laughed a little, pushing her glasses up.

“You two knew?!!!” Lance whined as he left the room to join those two in the hall. Keith, quicker than you would have thought, moved and pressed a button to close and lock the door. You heard a muffled ‘hey’ before footsteps that eventually faded away. He sighed. You gave a little laugh.

“That your first choice in hiding?” You giggled.

“Shut up,” he gave you a smile and a glance before flopping down on his bed with a groan. “This is why no one comes in here.”

“Aww I feel so special,” you giggled again as you climbed on top of him. You laid you head down as he dragged you completely on top of him. “By the way, about what Lance said.” Keith looked down to you. “What are we anyway?”

“Well, I’d prefer the privileges of boyfriend all the time. But if you wouldn’t then I don’t mind waiting,” you put yourself up on your arms at his directness.

“What?”

“What?” He repeated.

“Aren’t you supposed to be the closed off feelings guy? What was that?” You look at him bewildered.

“I will not hesitate to leave you here alone,” he gave you a playful glare. “Answer my sentence though.”

“What?”

“Do I get privileges?”

“I wouldn’t mind,” you looked away before sitting up fully. “You get to tell everyone though,” you smiled a bit.

“Ugh why,” he groaned and put his head to the side. His hands naturally rested on your hips. You both had been doing this so long you never even took it as something weird with the way you straddled him. You laughed a bit at him when he pinched your sides a bit.

“Deal?”

“Deal,” he smiled before pulling you a little closer and finally doing what he had been wanting to for the past month, finally kissing you.

#voltron #keith kogane #keith kogane x reader #Keith x reader #lance #Pidge #hunk #shiro #Allura #Coran #team voltron #voltron fanfiction

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queerquintessence · 4 years ago

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heyo

so i recently have been obsessed with the idea of the voltron paladins living in the same house together sooo

i may or may not have spent the last like 3 hours working on headcannons

the characters in the house are keith, lance, hunk, pidge, and allura

(since they’re all relatively similar in age)

so sadly no shiro or coran but

anyway

yeah here they are

(once again a bit unorganized but it’s whatev)

• first off allura and lance are both housewifes

• and neither of them take any shit from the others

• allura: keith, could you pick your feet up? i’m trying to vacuum down here

• keith, sitting on the couch: couldn’t you just do it later

• allura:

• allura: move your feet or i’m telling lonce you have a crush on him

• hunk does the dishes most of the time because he’s mainly the one who cooks their food

• but they also alternate on a schedule

• lance, sighing dramatically: i do everything around here! keith, when was the last time you washed the dishes?

• keith: i literally washed them last night

• lance: well you missed a plate so it doesn’t count

• keith takes out the trash a lot except he doesn’t wear shoes so his feet are always dirty

• lance yells at him for it

• whenever lance takes out the trash he puts on whoever’s shoes are closest

• pidge: lance are those my shoes?

• lance, tiptoeing in sneakers that are 3 sizes too small: maybe

• the couch that they own is too small to fit everyone

• they either argue for 10 minutes over who gets to sit where or they just pile on top of each other

• pidge usually lays on top of someone’s lap when it gets crowded

• she can just flop on top of someone and they’ll just let her- no words spoken

• keith sits on the armrests and everyone gives him shit for it

• lance: aren’t you uncomfortable?

• keith: i like sitting here

• lance: alright edgelord

• lance lays with his legs sprawled on top of the couch

• sometimes pidge will lay on lance who will have his legs on keith

• hunk is fine with sitting on the floor but even he’ll start arguing over the good spot on the couch

• hunk: lance, buddy, you sat there last time- why not give someone else a turn?

• lance: hunk when was the last time you did your own laundry? huh. that’s what i thought

• dinners pretty chaotic

• that’s usually when they have their debates

• lance, pounding his fist on the table: mac and cheese is to be eaten with a fork and that’s that

• pidge: why the hell would you use a fork? spoons are just fine in my opinion

• keith, silently munching on his food knowing he eats it with a knife:

• pidge: alright, we need to acknowledge the elephant in the room

• everyone:

• pidge:

• pidge: keith, you gotta stop putting corn syrup on your peanut butter sandwiches it’s fucking weird

• allura: everyone in favor of limiting lance’s shakira privileges say I

• keith, pidge, and hunk: I

• lance, who’s totally offended: wh

• luckily, they all have their own rooms

• except the walls are super thin

• lance scream singing beyoncé: GOT ME LOOKING SO CRAZY RIGHT NOW YOUR LOVES GOT ME LOOKING SO CRAZY RIGHT NOW

• keith: why has god forsaken me

• even when they try to play music relatively quiet it can still faintly be heard

• muffled music from keith’s room: when i was, a young boy

• pidge: HA fucking EMO

• they all have Alexa’s in their rooms

• and pidge has access to all of them on her laptop

• pidge: psst- hey lance, watch this

• pidge: *fast typing on laptop*

• blasting from keith’s room: COUNTRYYY ROAAADS TAKE ME HOOOOME

• muffled keith screaming: pIDGE I SWEAR TO GOD

• in the morning during breakfast

• allura: why has lonce not come out of his room yet?

• pidge: hang on, i’ll wake him up

• lance’s alexa in the distance: I’M A GOOFY GOOBER YEAH YOU’RE A GOOFY GOOBER YEAH

• lance’s startled scream is then followed by a loud thud

• once a week they have a movie night

• keith: lance i am not watching a cheesy romcom for the 2nd week in a row

• lance: i have to listen to ‘welcome to the black parade’ eighteen times a day sit the fuck down

• keith, crossed arm for the duration of movie night: this love story is completely unrealistic

• everybody shushes him on cue

• they also have monthly sleepovers in the living room where they giggle like middle schoolers

• keith knocks over an entire bowl of popcorn

• allura discovers the concept of a pillow fight and effortlessly knocks everybody to the ground

• lance flops on the air mattress and launches pidge across the room

• while everyone is trying to sleep

• lance: guys guys i’m gonna say something

• lance:

• lance: mayonnaise

• everybody loses their shit laughing because it’s 2 in the morning and they’re sleep deprived

• the bathroom sink is a mess

• their toothbrushes are color coordinated

• since they have to fit so much shit on the sink they have specific spots where they put their stuff

• pidge: hunk, your toothbrush is in my spot

• hunk: what? no- this corner of the sink is mine

• the debate results in all of them crowded in the bathroom arguing for 10 minutes

• keith: i don’t even remember having a designated spot on the sink

• allura: we need a toothbrush holder

• sometimes they do their nightly routines together

• which is also chaotic

• lance is applying a face mask, which drips onto pidge’s arm

• pidge then jerks her arm away- hitting keith’s toothbrush

• it then catapults off the counter and sticks to the wall

• keith: i left the room for one second what the hell did you do

• i’ve seen this headcannon somewhere before and i love it so i’m elaborating

• whenever keith is tired he’s giddy and hyper and loopy

• keith after not having a good nights sleep for 3 weeks, getting a running start and flipping onto the couch: a woop

• pidge: what in fucks name are you doing

• lance is the same exact way when he’s tired so they act like complete and utter idiots

• keith: lance, hey lance guess what

• lance: what

• keith:

• lance:

• they both burst out laughing

• lance: keith, omg you know what- keith rhymes with teeth

• keith:

• keith: holy shit

• eventually they both burn out and are just exhausted

• lance with his face planted in the carpet: uuuggghghggg

• allura: you finally done?

• lance: *angry muffled grumbling*

• pidge tends to fall asleep anywhere in the house

• usually with her computer on her lap or nearby

• she’s usually discovered the next morning

• hunk walking into the kitchen, sleepily rubbing his eyes: kinda want some orange juice

• pidge is just asleep on top of the fridge

• everyone else eating breakfast at the table

• keith: has anyone seen pidge?

• soft snoring is heard from under the table

• keith: ah

• they just put up with each other’s bullshit all day everyday and i love it

• lance, slamming his bedroom door open: everyone in my room i had a nightmare and need affection

• everyone emerges from their rooms grumbling and all file into lance room with their pillows and stuffed animals

• pidge trying to keep the remote away from lance: go long, hunk!

• keith appearing in the doorway and getting hit straight in the forehead with a remote: fUCK

• lance: are those my socks?

• keith: huh? oh, i dunno they were in my laundry pile

• lance: no those are totally my socks give them back right now

• when they all moved in together it was before keith and lance started dating so obviously there was shipping

• pidge, bursting into hunk’s room: i have klance tea

• hunk: spill

• lance: wh- keith and i are NOT dating

• pidge: you guys literally live together!

• lance: WE ALL LIVE TOGETHER

• allura, to hunk during dinner: i don’t know about you, but it seems to me like keith has a thing for lance

• keith: princess you’re not even whispering we can all hear you

• keith and lance secretly holding hands under the dinner table while lance is telling a story

• lance, being dramatic and expressive, lifts his hands in the air to accidentally reveal that his hand is intertwined with keith’s and its immediate chaos

• keith letting go immediately: wH HUH HOW DID THAT GET THERE

• pidge: I FUCKING TOLD YOU

anywayyy that’s all

i literally love this so much so don’t be surprised if i come up with some more later

yeah

bye

#lmao whoops i was so tired when i posted this i forgot to tag it #in my defense #it was 1:30 am #vld #voltron #vld headcanons #queerquintessence hcs #klance #kl #voltron funny #voltron legendary defender

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blueberry-sunshines · 4 years ago

Text

Small Surpises— Big Brother Shiro x Little Sister Reader

Summary:

You are Shiro's younger sister waiting on him to return from a mission while you reminisce about your life with your big brother which then gets interrupted when he brings you back an unexpected surprise...

Word Count: ~2K

Childhood memories | Brotherly Love

Requested by: @white_skittle on Wattpad

{Your POV}

Honestly, you had never really thought that it would be so boring to be in a half-castle half-spaceship until you were actually in one. It sounds crazy to even think you'd be in one let alone that one exists! One moment you were on earth with Keith trying to figure out these weird radio signals and then the next your brother who'd been missing for a year had crash landed onto earth in an alien pod! And just when you didn't think anything could get any crazier, you found a giant blue lion that whisked you all away into space! That was just the beginning of all the adventures you'd have traveling the universe with your new found family. But as of now, the only thing you could do is wait around the Castle of Lions until the Paladins are back from their mission. To keep your mind off of your boredom and anxiety you tried your best to distract yourself with useless things like wondering the castle and getting lost in your own thoughts.

You were significantly younger than your brother, Shiro. While he was 25, you were only a teenager. You two were always rather close despite your age difference. Shiro was always so cool, you and all of your friends thought he was the most amazing person in the whole world. And if you were being honest with yourself, he still was. I mean, being the paladin of the Black Lion and the leader of Voltron was the coolest thing you could think of! As kids you and Shiro loved playing together, you would play with his soldiers and planes or he'd play dolls with you. You two would spend hours playing little games like hide and seek or just playing pretend.

You would be the princess and Shiro would always be the courageous knight there to protect and save you from evil villains and mystical dragons. Using sticks and pool noodles as swords he would slay any foes that even dared to hurt his little sister. Shiro has always been your hero in more ways than you'd ever realize.

"Fear not, Princess (Y/N)!" He would cry, holding his makeshift sword in the air. "I will slay this dragon to protect you and your kingdom from his evil!" He would then jab at one of your stuffed animals or sometimes even trees, pretending they were the villain.

As you got older, you two were still super close. Shiro was then entering his teens, going to the Galaxy Garrison to be a pilot. He was so smart and so talented and all you ever wanted to do was impress him. When you didn't think he could get any cooler he always did. But even though he was at the Garrison, he still had never let you down. You have many memories of Shiro picking you up after school and taking you out to your favorite diner. Sitting in a booth across from each other he would ask you about your day while drinking a milkshake in his bright orange Cadet uniform.

"You look silly in your uniform, Takashi." Little you giggled in your memory. You could still see Shiro's face as he pulled away from his Oreo milkshake's straw, as well as the smile that formed on his face as he let out a small chuckle.

"I guess I do look kind of silly, huh?" He agreed, setting down his milkshake softly.

These couple times a week visits made it feel like Shiro had never really left at all. Soon you were able to transfer into the Garrison Cadet program and next thing you remember is staying up late into the night studying with Shiro and practicing your techniques. Shiro was the star of the Garrison and he still remained the star of your life. Sure you had made many friends, but Shiro was still your best friend above all else. You still remember when Shiro had introduced you to Keith and how you two got off to a rocky start. But eventually, it didn't feel like it was just you and Shiro against the world anymore. Soon you had a new honorary brother in Keith. You would all ride around together on Hoverbikes and Landspeeders and you even would take Keith for milkshakes at your diner.

"Hah!" You beamed triumphantly as you swung to a halt on your hoverbike. You looked behind you now as your brother came up to a stop behind you. You laughed triumphantly as you had just beaten Shiro to your designated finish line. "I told you I could beat you!"

"I never doubted you for a second." Shiro told you proudly as he whipped the sweat from his forehead.

You looked now on the other side of you over the edge of the large cliff next to you. "So can I learn the dive now?" You blurted out quickly.

Shiro laughed warmly, "Absolutely not." He said quickly and gave you a teasing smile. "Not until I'm sure you and Keith are both ready." He explained, watching you pout in amusement.

As you were entering your teenage years and Shiro was leaving his, you two had somehow managed to grow even closer. He had come out to you over the course of your time at the Garrison. You still remember him gushing to you all about his, then crush, Adam. You were there for him when coming to terms with his feelings and there when he brought Adam home to your parents for the first time. In return he was always there for you, helping you when you were sick, giving you advice when you were down in the dumps, and he helped you through your first ever breakup.

Time was flying by so quickly and soon, you were an accomplished pilot just like your big brother, and Shiro had asked Adam to marry him. Life was just the way you liked it and you didn't think anything could ruin your wonderful relationship with Shiro. If none of the petty sibling fights you got into or even any of the serious ones could have ruined it, you didn't know what could. But, you could never forget Kerberos...

"We're back!!!" You heard a voice shout from a room over. It was the cherry voice of Lance McClain exclaiming their arrival in the castle. You began running back down the corridor to return to the lounge where you heard the voices coming from.

"Hey, (Y/N)!" Hunk smiled seeing you enter the room. You saw Lance, Pidge, Hunk, Keith, and Allura all standing in the room.

"How did it go out there today?" You asked them all, subconsciously looking around for your brother. The Paladins went to a freed planet to collect some tech that was needed to help the fight against the Galra.

"We collected all the samples we needed." Pidge told you before gesturing behind her, "Coran and Shiro are unloading as we speak." She was unusually smiley, but you brushed it off as her just being happy to have new tech to work with. You were about to leave to go find Shiro when,

"(Y/N)," Keith said your name now, walking over to you, also dawning a small smile. "There's also something we brought back for you, too."

"Hey!" You heard Lance complain, "I wanted to be the one to tell (Y/N)!"

"Too bad." Keith smirked at him and the two began a small, signature squabble as they walked past towards the direction of the showers.

You looked over at Pidge and Hunk now curiously, "What are they talking about?" You asked them, furrowing your brow in thought trying to guess what on earth they could have brought you. You heard them both giggle as they refused to give you any clue before heading towards the showers as well. Your last hope was Allura.

She just looked as confused as you, "I do wonder what they had brought you as well." She said warmly before following you towards the other door the four Paladins had come from originally. As you and Allura made your way down the hallway she tried to offer you ideas as to what they could've brought you, but half the things she said you had no idea what she was talking about.

Once you reached the hangar where the Paladins had come from, you sprinted towards the Black Lion. Coran was placing small metal crates onto a floating cart and Shiro was helping him.

"Shiro, Hey!" You yelled as you got closer, Allura still following suit.

"(Y/N)!" Shiro called your name happily placing down a crate and turning towards you. You laughed as you ran into his arms, you felt him stumble a bit upon impact and you heard him chuckle.

"You really missed me that much?" He teased you as he gave you a tight squeeze before putting you back safely balanced onto your feet.

"Always do." You smiled up at him affectionately. You then cut right to the chase, "Keith said you guys brought me something!"

Shiro raised an eyebrow at you, "He did, did he?" You nodded in response and he let out another laugh. "Alright, you got me." He admitted humbly.

"Is it another crystal?" You asked excitedly. Shiro had brought you small trinkets before from the missions you didn't get to go on. The Paladins often needed your help, but sometimes when there wasn't any risk you'd just stay behind.

"It's better than that." He said mysteriously as he lead you back towards his lion.

"Is it a bigger crystal?" You asked which earned you a laugh in return.

"No... now stop guessing!" He shook his head in amusement. "Wait here, I'll be right back." Shiro instructed you, turning snd disappearing into the lion.

You looked back over to where Allura and Coran were conversing about something while you waited. Once your brother reemerged from Black, he was holding a small box that had some kind of cloth or blanket sticking out from it. You stared at the box in pure curiosity as Shiro grew closer.

"Keep your voice down," he advised as the contents of the box were nearly in full sight. "You don't want to startle him."

You were still not understanding what this could be but now you were thinking it may be alive. Despite not knowing, you listened to your brother and kept quiet. Shiro held the box further down and you saw him.

You had to hold in a squeal as you saw what Shiro had brought you. It was a small light gray ball of fluff. The creature had long droopy ears, four legs with five tiny toes on his paws. It had four small horns above his closed eyes, a pink nose and cute little pouting mouth. His chest and his face were white and he was all curled up in his long, white, fluffy tail. He sort of reminded you of a chinchilla but much more alien like.

Gasping you looked back up to Shiro, "No way..." you breathed out finally. Shiro had a large smile on his face.

"Do you like him?" He asked now, "His breed is concerned to be a loyal partner on Ormaphu. He's a traditional Ormanphian pet called a Bentorm."

"Shiro I love him!" You gushed looking back down as your sweet, little baby Bentorm.

"I'm glad, I thought you would."

When you were kids, you would always beg your parents for a pet but they never let you or Shiro get anything besides fish. Your new Bentorm was the most amazing pet you could think of! Your attention was turned back to the box when you heard him let out a soft yawn as he stretched and uncurled himself. You let out a soft aww, as he sat upright and looked up at you with big, black eyes. He looked as if he was smiling as he looked up at you, he began making a sweet chirping noise and you looked up at Shiro in amazement.

"You can pick him up." Shiro told you softly, smile still prominent on his face. You reached down and picked him up softly from his tummy, under his arms. You pulled him close to your chest and he quickly snuggled into you, smile on his cute, Bentorm face.

"From what his breeder told me, they don't get much bigger and they love riding on their owners shoulders as they get older."

"Allura!" You exclaimed, "Look what Shiro brought me!!"

Allura came over then, in the same awe that you were upon seeing him for the first time. "Is that a Bentorm?" Allura asked looking up at Shiro.

Shiro nodded and moved the box onto his hip you free one of his hands to pet the Bentorms head.

"What are you gonna call him?" Shiro asked looking back up to you.

"Hmmm, I'm not sure..."

_________________

Hi everyone! Thanks for reading this Brother Shiro one shot! It wasn't super long but I think it's pretty cute. Shiro would be the best big brother and I hope I captured that!

Have a great day! Keep requesting please!

#big brother shiro #shiro voltron #shiro x reader #shiro x sister reader #vld shiro #shiro vld #voltron shiro #takashi shirogane #voltron one shot #voltron x reader

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willadisastercry · 4 years ago

Text

More than ‘just a little tired’: the aftermath part 2

tw: lil bit of gore described, burn wounds, collapsing, lots of pain described, muscle relaxer used and effects described, slight paralysis ensues, emotionally heavy towards end.

Keith finally let’s his friends help him but his adrenaline is fading rapidly and everyone is still focused on fussing over Pidge. Lance is distraught with how cold Shiro is being, he doesn’t understand why no one is listening to him while he’s literally supporting Keith with his own body as he crashes. Hunk needs to look at something other than the blood and gore so he tries to find Coran’s magic cream and is just proud he only threw up once.

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3

“Woah, Hunk! He’s going down!”

Lance dropped to his knee as he struggled to keep Keith from falling further out of his grasp, his face now deathly pale and pressed against his shoulder as he took in large, shuddering breaths to try remain conscious.

“We’ve gotcha bud,” Hunk’s hand snaked around his waist then as Lance righted himself and they brought him back onto unsteady legs, his right not even strong enough now to put much weight on without buckling.

“C’mon we gotta go...”

With his arms slung over either boy’s shoulders and their hands hoisting his hips up by the supply pack on his utility belt, they made their way to the med bay relatively quickly, a feat of which was only possible because at some point Keith had stopped trying to keep up and allowing himself to be dragged was surprisingly a lot faster.

The whooshing of the med bay doors after what felt like an enternity was what startled Keith into opening his eyes again.

“Oh, hey guys...” Shiro said, sparing only a partial glance their way before continuing to pour over Pidge with Coran and Allura. She was awake and fighting the helping hands.

No one seemed to notice Keith’s prone form held up entirely by his friends who stood frozen in the doorway, a bit at a loss for how to proceed.

“I think I’m fine, guys! Seriously. All that’s left is already half healed and not nearly deep enough to warrant a freaking pod!”

“Maybe, but you still lost a lot of blood that will need to be repelenished...” Coran pointed, his mustache twitching as he attempted to convey the necessity of the percaution and failed.

Keith’s legs hadn’t been contributing much to the effort of keeping him standing but admittedly had some part in it because the longer they remained where they stood the more they seemed to melt into jelly.

The adrenaline had almost entirely worn off by then, leaving his body buzzing as the pain slowly intensified.

“G-guys...” Keith whispered weakly, his voice was barely audible.

“What’s—“

“Need to sit... like now...” he managed before his legs were wobbling dangerously, suddenly devoid of all the strength that remained in them.

“Alright, that’s okay. Over there, Lance,” Hunk assured, his injured leg completely useless as he transferred even more of Keith’s weight onto his hip to make up the difference while they ushered him towards one of the chairs across the room.

“Uhhhh, how much longer you guys gonna be with Pidge?” Lance questioned nervously once they’d settled Keith down, his heart clenching with fear for how grey his face had gotten, his hands never leaving his drawn up shoulders out of fear of what would happen if he did.

Hunk was already across the room tearing apart medicine cabinets for the burn cream he’d mentioned and Keith was finding it increasingly difficult to support his own body weight.

“Woah! Okkay—that’s okay, just lean against me,” Lance offered when Keith couldn’t keep himself from swaying as he narrowly avoided leaning back against the chair, nearly tilting out of it before Lance righted him and guided his head to lean against his hip.

“We’ll be done as soon as Pidge stops being difficult... why?” Shiro asked, his eyes still scanning the partially mended slash across the smaller girl’s stomach.

“Just uh, Keith is sort of not doing so well.”

Lance wasn’t entirely sure he understood why everyone was being so curt and dismissive, not tearing their eyes away from a clearly fine Pidge, who yes, at one point had been not fine at all, but was now.

And Keith wasn’t.

The blasts on his back were... bad.

Bad enough for him to be in so much pain he was forced to accept his friend’s help. Lance also figured the haunting glaze of exhaustion in his eyes and purple bruises beneath them had a good deal to do with lowering his defenses, the realization of just how tired he was sending another jab to his chest.

The material of his suit looked like it had melted into his skin, lining the edges of the puffy burns with a smokey black. Some were larger than others but there were at least a dozen and they were all bleeding steadily, the constant rise and fall of his chest making it impossible for any of them to clot.

“I’ll come check him out once—“

The burns were so deep, like little caverns carved into his skin and Lance was suddenly concerned about how zapped the nerves must be that he didn’t even realize he’d been injured this severely.

They looked so painful.

Breathing looked painful. And sitting, and talking and the way moving air brushed against them.

Shit, Keith.

“No, Shiro...”

The words came from deep in his throat, his voice low and serious, a stark derision from his usually charming vibrato.

“I think someone needs to check him out now. We’re talking about Keith here! You should know better than anyone that when he’s says he’s not okay, he means it.”

Shiro’s shoulders dropped as he straightened up, Lance couldn’t even find it in himself to worry about getting told off for his tone with how angry he was, his irritation justifying itself as he watched Keith’s breathing devolve into something more and more erratic.

The room seemed to silence all at once after he’d raised his voice. The inflection of it, shrill with fear and frustration is what got Shiro to finally look their way, his already weary expression falling further at the horror of how Keith looked against Lance. Slumped and panting, his features tight in anguish as blood dripped steadily from somewhere and collected in a now sizeable puddle on the floor.

Pidge was being forced to lay back down when surging up to see what was wrong had her keening and clutching her middle, Allura remaining at her side while Shiro and Coran raced over to the boys.

“What the fuck happened?!” Shiro demanded, his eyes grey pinpoints that bored into Lance with a sort of accusation until the two men reached the pair, both gasping simultaneously when they got close enough to take in the sight of Keith’s back.

“I don’t-I don’t understand, you said you were tired Keith!”

“Plasma blast burns... most of them 2nd degree it looks like...” Coran offered, his eyes flicking wildly as they scanned the burnt and bloody skin.

“He is tired...” Lance assured, turning his gaze back to Keith’s shaking shoulders. His trembles seemed more like spasms then, each jerk prompting a fresh gush of red from the wounds.

“He’s fucking exhausted but was too stubborn to tell anyone he was hurt...” he continued as Coran left muttering to himself in search of supplies, joining Hunk in his endeavor of locating more than just the burn cream now.

“S-sorry... really thought it was just one...” Keith explained before Shiro shushed him, crouching down to run his hand through his hair even though it was slightly damp with sweat.

His eyes weren’t open so he tensed when the hand first fell into place but soon softened under Shiro’s touch, the cold weight of the galra metal oddly comforting.

“It’s not on you, bud. I should’ve checked in more thoroughly, looked you over myself...”

Lance seethed at that, Keith was feeling guilty when Shiro was the one who had fucked up by ignoring him. He didn’t even sound sorry.

“Damn right you sh—“

“What’s that?” Shiro entreated, cutting him off and lifting his head to face the younger boy with something so fierce in his eyes that Lance had to force himself to look elsewhere.

As much as he wanted to tell Shiro how royally he’d fuck up he knew it wouldn’t be productive. Knew full well that the last thing anyone needed was more chaos.

But before Lance had to take actual precautions to contain his anger, Keith made a noise as if he wanted to respond but all that came out was a defeated whine as his chest stuttered which pulled even more at the mess of his back, sending him into a fit of flinching and hissing.

“Hey, you’re alright—“ Lance cooed, the additional hand on Keith’s neck centering him while he tried to ride out the pain without causing more “—that’s it, just take a second to calm down...”

But Keith couldn’t calm his breathing in time to avoid the waves of agony that followed such harsh breaths, eventually becoming desperate enough to clamp his lips shut and hold his breath until his heart let up with its incessant pounding.

This admittedly made the general haze clouding his mind so much worse, sending black dots dancing across the floor as he stared at it against Lance. He hadn’t realized when his hands had traveled up to clutch at Lance’s stomach but they were there now, clawing at the unwavering material stuck to his torso like glue for something to hold onto.

There were so many hands on him but he couldn’t feel much of anything other than the heat on his back and strain in his lungs as he continued to restrict his breathing. It had come to hurt so badly he was afraid to even try to breath normally again.

“-ith!”

Voices sounded so weird and distant then, like they were calling to him from across a noisy room.

“KEITH!”

It wasn’t until someone was knelt down next to him and nearly screaming in his ear that he could understand anything.

“Stop doing that, you have to take deeper breaths or you’ll pass out...”

But he couldn’t manage anything other than short and rapid inhales that weren’t nearly enough. He didn’t care if he passed out. It wouldn’t hurt so bad if he were unconscious and it had gotten to a point where he sort of wished for that kind of relief.

Coran was speaking to Shiro over them then, of which Keith had only ascertained from the way Shiro’s hand left the base of his skull to rest more on the crown of his head just as a dull and disordered humming began.

His hearing had abandoned him again once Shiro left his position, reducing the conversation to unintelligible murmurs drowned out by the rumbling in his eardrums. The static spotting his vision not letting up as the blast wounds burned relentlessly on his back. It felt like there were literal flames licking up at even the slightest movement and marring deep as the fire only seemed to spread.

The entire expanse of his upper body had gone numb with it, his arms slack at his sides and his neck weak under the weight of his head as he put all of his concentration into slowing his breathing and keeping it as controlled as possible. He didn’t even feel the hands slipping under his armpits or fingers tugging at his supply belt, only the scorching stretch of his body straightening as he was pulled to his feet.

Lance and Shiro shifted around him with care, Shiro guiding his head to rest on his shoulder when it rolled limply, Coran hovering anxiously as they struggled to lift him to his feet without jarring his injuries. In reality, it was entirely unavoidable but hey, it’s the thought that counts.

Keith really tried to hold his own weight this time, but as soon as he was upright, his back lit with a new fury that had his vision whiting. Soon he couldn’t even be certain his feet were still on the ground as his body went lax and the darkness that had been teasing him descended quicker than he could process.

He assumed he had screamed bloody murder since his stinging throat was the only pain he could pinpoint as he lost consciousness, but by then he wouldn’t have been able to hear his own voice if he spoke so he wasn’t be sure. All he knew was that he’d pitched into a slew of arms like his bones had spontaneously emulsified, blissfully unaware as to how the whole room seemed to cry out when he did.

Pidge was near tears with Allura struggling to assure her that Keith would be fine, and Hunk was so startled by the commotion that he had nearly flung the supplies he was organizing on a sterile tray.

“Let’s get him settled comfortably before he comes to,” Coran ordered, his voice sharp and anguished as he motioned towards where Hunk was stood.

Together and with considerable effort the three dragged Keith’s limp body to the other side of the room, careful to keep his torso straight and his injured leg from bending so they didn’t inflame his wounds further, depositing his lifeless weight onto the table on his stomach where all of his injuries could be tended to.

“We have to get as much of the suit off as possible... some of it will of course take a little more effort,” Coran sighed as he poked at one of the darker blast marks with a wider radius than most of the other. There was a ring of molten black around it that looked like it had dripped into the pit of missing flesh from where the material of the suit had melted off. The sentry that shot him there must have been only a few feet away.

“Alaran...” Allura gasped out as she made her way to the group once Pidge had calmed down enough to be left alone.

“These are going to need extensive cleaning before we can put him into a pod.”

“I know, Princess. Let’s get started, maybe we can get the bulk of it finished while he’s still uncioncious,” Coran postured, distributing the supplies Hunk had gathered to everyone.

The task was harrowing and had everyone slightly queasy, but the urgency to complete the process before Keith woke up prevailed everyone’s gag reflexes, even Hunk’s.

Being enveloped by the black that had teased him so long wasn’t as bad as Keith had imagined it would be. It was warm like this, more absent of cold than possesing a distinguishable heat. Pleasant. Peaceful even. A more than welcomed improvement to the inferno he was slowly being consumed by when he was awake and alert.

Sounds started coming back to him slowly as his body recovered from the shock of his plummet in blood pressure. His friends’ words sharpening gradually to where he could almost make out what they were saying.

“...suction... yes, that bit has to go as well...”

He still felt floaty and numb from the pain but knew he was laying on his front and could feel a sensation of tugging and pulling on his back.

“...keeps moving... waking up...”

It wasn’t so much painful as it was uncomfortable in his state of semi-consciousness.

“...dangerous to... sedative before a prolonged stay in the pod...”

His brain was just too fuzzy, still replenishing the blood supply to his brain.

“...looks like he’s in pain...”

Each moment he remained in limbo he grew more restless.

“...Coran I can’t... this piece... tearing the skin...”

The in and out of everything was making him anxious, he’d rather just be entirely out or entirely conscious.

“...should will help with any discomfort...”

Whatever was meant to help wasn’t. He was aware he’d probably been given some sort of drug or medicine but still he couldn’t relax.

It didn’t matter that he was utterly exhausted, his body was reacting to the anxiety bubbling in his stomach whether he had the energy to support such a reaction or not.

“...easy Keith...”

That’s the thing, he couldn’t take it easy. His mind was wired and his body was going into shock once again as things clarified and he woke up more.

“You’re alright number four... steady now, just breathe...”

If he thought it was hard to breathe before it seemed like it was absolutely impossible now.

“-us? Keith...? Keith, can you hear us?”

He could. He could hear everything now. It was all so loud and piercing, everyone’s voices, the tools clicking, his heart beating, the tear of medical supplies packages. Everything was so crisp and right there, the smallest noises sending tingles down his spine that made him want to cringe and he struggled to surpress the urge to.

“Quiznak! Coran I’m gonna hurt him if he keeps squirming!”

He was panting now, his mouth hung open against the towel folded under his face that was catching the blood still leaking from the wound under his eye. A hand came down on the back of his neck and he jumped.

That did it for the pain that seemed to have been numbed, not gone, just too far away for him to register. It was just as close as all of the sounds were now.

Hands clutched at his shoulders and forearms and hips as he wailed, pushing him flat so his flailing didn’t make it worse. He sobbed loudly and unabashedly as the pain surged its way back to the forefront of his awareness, a strange warmth similar to the one he’d felt when he had passed out taking the edge off but not staving it much.

“Keith! Listen to me, you have to relax. I know this is torture, but you’re only going to make it worse if you keep struggling,” Shiro urged, his voice the closest.

Shiro was right, but he couldn’t. He wasn’t in control of his movements anymore, because if he was he would listen. He didn’t want to hurt anymore but his body didn’t seem to give a shit.

“Coran,” Allura said sadly, her eyes looking at him with a sort of heart breaking resolution.

“Okay, Princess,” he agreed, his expression falling dejectedly.

“What-what is it? What just happened?!” Lance asked worriedly, knowing something had seemingly been decided but no idea as to what.

“We’re going to have to give him a muscle relaxer to keep him still, but it won’t take away his pain. We simply cannot risk putting him in a pod while medically sedated, we couldn’t be sure he would ever wake again if we did.”

For the second time that evening a collective silence fell over the room, one filled with such aching and regret and fear that it was as if it wasn’t silent at all.

“Do whatever you have to,” Shiro advocated, handing the tools he’d been using to Hunk.

“But he’ll be in pain Shiro?!” Lance noted desperately, his indignation back in full force.

Shiro just looked at him sadly and moved to drag a stool over to the other end of the table where Keith’s head was, his face twisted up as his sounds of pain continued.

“How can you be so heartless? It wouldn’t be so painful if Allura had partially healed him too! If you had given enough of a shit to notice sooner! To notice at all!”

The sound of Lance yelling bore into Keith’s skull sickeningly, his body unable to contain the shiver that overtook his muscles at how bone deep the sound irked his now oversentive ears.

“Lance—“

“No, Allura. He’s right, this is my fault. I was too focused on the fact that Pidge was hurt to notice that he was too and now he’s worse off because of it. I didn’t listen to him when I should’ve. Administer whatever you have to Coran, I’ll help him through this, it’s the least I can do right now...”

Coran didn’t have to be told twice, skillfully pulling liquid from a vile with a syringe that he poked gently into Keith’s neck.

Hunk nudged Lance’s arm to break his death glare at Shiro and get back to freeing one of the wider wounds on his shoulder as the medicine took affect almost immediately.

“Sh-sh-shir-Shiro...”

“I’m right here, shhhh, don’t speak. Just relax, I’ve got you,” Shiro soothed, grasping Keith’s hand tightly as he took shuddering breaths that grew more and more shallow as whatever control he had left over his body slipped away from him.

With some last few twitches he sagged completely into the table. The hand clutching Shiro’s released its grip and the older boy started to thumb assuring circles into the limp appendage since he could still feel it.

“This is gonna suck, but just focus on me okay?”

Keith couldn’t nod, couldn’t move his exhausted body at all now, so he sighed instead. The tears that had welled at his eyes falling defeatedly and mixing with the blood staining his right cheek to make a slightly pinker mess on the towel beneath him.

“Just focus on me...”

#voltron fandom #keith angst #keith voltron #keith whump #lance and hunk to the rescue #protective lance #bad shiro #voltron fic #voltron whump #voltron fanfic #voltron pidge #hunk is here too #he doesn’t throw up this time #vld #whumpee #emotional whump #whump fic #voltron #burn wounds

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actress4him · 4 years ago

Text

Bonus Whumptober Content Part 2

Original Whumptober fic here

Bonus Content Part 1 here

Find it all on AO3 here

Thanks for all of the support on the last chapter! I appreciate each and every one of the likes and reblogs and follows I’ve gotten.

Tagging @outtacommission again because Keith would not have been resurrected from the dead without his bribery.

Here is chapter 3 of this fic... see you next week for the conclusion!

Fandom: Voltron: Legendary Defender

Warnings: referenced amputation, blood mention, referenced broken bones, self-esteem issues, suicide ideation, death mention, nightmares, abandonment issues

When he woke again, he was lying back down on the pillow, staring up at the blank white ceiling. For one, blissful moment, he didn’t remember the events leading up to him passing out again. But it all came crashing down on him an instant later, taking his breath away.

My leg.

My leg, my leg.

My arm, my face, my leg.

“Keith?” Shiro’s voice was quiet, tentative. Not like him. “Are you awake?”

He wanted to roll over on his side and ignore him. Close his eyes, maybe go back to sleep, pretend that the world and this nightmare didn’t exist for a little while longer. The only reason he refrained was because he wasn’t sure if his stupid, wrecked body could actually manage it.

“What did you do to me?” It was only a whisper, and as slurred as it was, he wouldn’t have been surprised if it was impossible to understand.

Shiro’s breath hitched audibly. If Keith had been looking at his face, he was sure he wouldn’t like the anguished expression that he would see there. But at that moment, he didn’t have the capacity to care.

“Do you want me to...explain...how it...happened?”

No. Yes. He didn’t know. He needed to know why him losing a leg had been the best option, but at the same time he wasn’t sure if he could handle hearing about it. In the end, he just lifted one shoulder - the one that actually listened and responded right away - in a shrug.

Shiro shifted in his seat, leaning forward so just the tip of his white bangs were in Keith’s periphery. “I already told you that you...died. On that planet. So when we got back to the Castle, you dying again was a distinct possibility. We...it’s like Fallenta said. We had to get you into a pod, even though your...your left arm was broken, and your knees, especially, were a mess from where the console landed on them.”

He paused, rubbing his palms together. “We didn’t know what would happen. I was scared to death that some of those breaks wouldn’t be able to be fixed after the pod. I mean, we were headed to Tellima, but…” His head dropped. “We had no choice. That hole in your stomach...you were dying.”

Keith could almost imagine it - the frantic atmosphere in the infirmary, the blood everywhere, the desperate conversations escalating into shouts as they debated on what to do. He had no doubt that he really had been dying, that they had made the choice they thought was best. He just wasn’t sure if he agreed with that choice.

“When you came out of the pod, once the stomach wound was healed enough for you to be stable, Fallenta started working on re-breaking the bones so that they could be set correctly. It was...awful.” The shudder was obvious in his voice. “I’m glad she was able to do it, of course, but I’m also glad that you were unconscious the whole time. Your arm was relatively easy. Your left knee...it took her hours. It was in so many tiny little pieces. And your right…”

Automatically Keith flinched at the reminder of what was no longer there. Of the scarred, chopped off stump that lay just underneath the blanket, and the way his leg just...ended. He could see the void where the rest of it should have been even now, if he were to look down. He was purposely avoiding it.

Shiro heaved a huge sigh. “Unfortunately, your right knee was shattered in a way that had been blocking the circulation in your lower leg the whole time. The tissue down there was...dead.” He paused again. “Keith, I’ve...trust me, I’ve gone ‘round and ‘round in my head ever since we...trying to figure out if there was something I could have done differently. And...I don’t think there was. We did what we had to do to save your life. I’m just...I’m sorry that we couldn’t save your leg, too.”

His leg was gone.

Would he ever be able to walk again? Could they find a prosthetic for him like Shiro had, that worked as well as the real thing? Even if they did, how long would it take him to get used to walking on it? Just walking, not even counting anything like running, jumping, fighting.

Fighting was what he did. It was the one and only thing besides flying that he was good at. He was crap with a gun, he couldn’t sit up in a sniper’s nest like Lance. He needed to be able to move. If he couldn’t, even just for the time that it took to learn how with a new leg and an arm that only half worked...

They’d replace him. What good was a paladin who was crippled? Who couldn’t pull his weight? As soon as Red woke up and found out what happened to him she would realize that he was useless now. And the Princess, the rest of the team...they already knew it. They were probably already looking for a new Red Paladin. How long would it be until they dropped him off on Earth, or on some Coalition planet? Probably as soon as he was healed enough. They didn’t have time to keep taking care of an invalid, they had a universe to save.

They did. Not him. Not anymore.

“Should’ve left me there.”

There was dead silence for a moment.

“What?”

Keith tipped his head back further into the pillow, eyes roving over the featureless ceiling as if he’d see something new. “I tol’ you not to come. I tol’ you to leave me there. You didn’t listen.”

“And now you’re alive.”

“Yeah, but why?”

“Keith…”

His hands fisted in the blanket, jaw clenched in sudden fury. “Don’t ‘Keith’ me. Why, Shiro? Why am I alive? What is the point? You know what all this means.”

It meant he’d be alone. And he couldn’t...he couldn’t do alone. Not again. Not when he found a group of people that he actually cared about for the first time in so long. Not when he was just finally getting used to always having people around, always having someone to talk to or distract him from the thoughts that tried to consume him. Not when he barely survived it the first time.

He’d rather be dead than alone.

Shiro sucked in a deep breath through his nose. “That life is gonna be hard for a while? That you’re gonna have to work harder than ever to get back to where you were? Yeah, Keith, I do know. I know more than anyone else.”

Oh.

Shiro must think he was so incredibly self-centered.

He was self-centered.

He should have thought about how acting like losing a leg was worse than dying would seem to the man who had lost an arm and kept going. But instead he was all caught up in how he was going to lose everything he had grown to love and rely on. Acting like the self-absorbed brat that everyone at the Garrison except Shiro had accused him of being.

“That means I also know how hard it is to accept,” Shiro was saying. “It’s going to take time to adjust. But you will, I promise, and I’ll be here to help you every step of the way.”

Yeah, right. Keith didn’t know if he was lying to make him feel better, or if he just hadn’t yet realized or accepted that Allura and the rest of the team wouldn’t want to keep him around.

“Just...please, Keith. Please don’t say that we should have let you die. You don’t know…” His voice caught. “I’ve spent these last weeks hoping, praying that you would live. Scared out of my mind every moment of every day that you wouldn’t.”

Keith finally forced himself to turn his head toward his brother and saw him brush the back of his wrist across his eyes. Just that movement was enough to make his heart drop to his stomach. Shiro didn’t cry. At least not where anyone could see him.

Slowly, he slid his hand out across the bed, palm up. A peace offering. It took only a moment for Shiro to take it, squeezing it so hard he thought a few more bones might break.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. And he was. Not for thinking it, but for saying it. He didn’t want to cause any more pain for any of his friends.

That’s why when it was time for him to go, he’d do it quietly. No fuss. Don’t let them see your fear or your pain - he had learned that long, long ago. He was good at it.

Shiro gave him a shaky smile. “It’ll be alright, Keith. I promise.”

Swallowing down the words that sprang to his tongue, he gave a nod. “Okay.”

The next morning Keith woke up to an empty room. In a way, it was a relief. They obviously didn’t see the need to watch over him and baby him twenty-four-seven anymore. But he was, for all intents and purposes, stuck. With no leg, he couldn’t just get up and leave the room whenever he wanted, head to the training room like he normally would in the morning. There’d be no training for him for a long time.

Of course there was breakfast to think about, too, and he wasn’t sure whether to expect someone to bring it to him, or to bring him to it. Either way, he hated it. He had always hated being treated like he was helpless, and now it was even worse because he actually was helpless.

He went ahead and made up his mind, though. No matter what their plan was, he had no desire to be carried through the Castle to the dining room where everyone would give him those looks of pity. Poor Keith. Can’t even walk by himself. It’s just too bad he can’t stay.

He was in the midst of pushing himself up off the pillows, trying to get his right side to cooperate long enough to get in an upright position he could balance in and trying to ignore the strange lightness of his leg, when the door opened and Pidge slipped in.

“Hey,” she said softly. Padding over, she perched carefully on the edge of the chair that first Hunk, then Shiro had occupied.

Tucking his left leg up close to him - the knee creaking in protest at being used for the first time since healing - Keith cleared his throat. “Hi.”

Silence fell, but it had never been awkward between the two. The introverted arms of Voltron. Pidge just gazed at him for a long moment, her eyes saying all the things he knew she would never actually be able to say with words. “It’s good to see you awake. I was really worried about you.”

On the outside, she merely shoved her glasses back up into the bridge of her nose and sniffed. “You better not quiznakin’ ever do that again.”

Keith’s lips turned up at the corners for the first time since waking the day before. “Alright.”

Besides Shiro, he thought he would miss Pidge the most of all. They got each other more than anyone else.

“So.” Straightening up, she whipped a tablet out of her hoodie pocket. “We’ve been working on a leg for you. The Tellimites have crazy good medical technology, so obviously we’re using their notes, but I’ve also been talking back and forth with the Olkari, because they’re, of course, crazy good with biological connections, and we’ve come up with a design that should communicate really well with your body and, essentially, work like the real thing.”

She launched into a detailed scientific explanation of how every inch of it worked, tapping and flicking through various diagrams that just looked like a plain prosthetic leg to him. He didn’t understand but a few words here and there, but he let her talk. This was one of her passions, and it was nice to let her be able to ramble about it for once without having to worry about being rushed. The way her face lit up was worth every second.

“So...what do you think?” Suddenly she sounded uncertain as she blinked up at him. “We definitely want your input on it. I mean, I suggested putting in a rocket booster, but Hunk pointed out that it would be difficult to control with only one. Lance wanted to add lasers that shot out anytime you stomped your foot, but that seemed pretty dangerous for like, running and stuff, so…”

It almost sounded like they expected him to still be fighting with this thing. Well, maybe he would. Eventually. After all, he wouldn’t feel right about just ignoring the existence of the war when the people he cared about were still out there fighting it, so he’d do his best to get back into shape. Maybe he could convince them to find a Coalition planet for him that had soldiers he could fight with someday.

It wouldn’t be the same as fighting with this team, his...his friends. But at least he wouldn’t be completely useless.

He met Pidge’s eyes and realized she was still waiting on an answer from him. Part of him wanted to keep his words to a minimum, not wanting her to hear his new speech impediment, but he swallowed his pride. “It, uh...whatever you guys come up with I’m sure will be great.” He actually hadn’t even been sure whether to expect them to work on it themselves, or put it off on the Tellimites or some other able species. It made sense, though, that Pidge and Hunk would want to jump on this opportunity to design something they had never gotten to do before. He forced a small smile. “But...yeah, let’s hold off on weaponizing it.”

Smirking, Pidge turned off the tablet and stuck it back in her pocket. “Alright, if you insist. Lance is gonna be super disappointed, though.”

“I’m sure.” He could hear the whining and complaining about how boring and unimaginative he was now.

“So, I was supposed to ask you about breakfast…?”

Keith stared down at his hands. “Oh. Yeah. I don’...think I’m really ready to...try to move around yet, so…”

He was such a bad liar. But Pidge either didn’t notice or was being nice and pretending not to, merely nodding and standing.

“Okay. I’ll tell Shiro, he’ll probably bring you a plate down here.”

“Thanks, Pidge.”

She turned back from the doorway and smiled softly at him. “No problem.”

The nightmares came that night.

And the next. And the next.

Snippets of things he didn’t remember during the day, and wouldn’t remember again when he woke. Alarms blaring. Lights flashing. A horrifying crunching sound, then crippling pain and a bitter taste in the back of his throat.

And then...nothing. No one came. No one heard him calling. He stayed there, alone and bleeding in the dark, until the pain became too much and he slipped away.

He woke with tears streaming down his cheeks and a scream on his lips that didn’t quite make it out into the still air of the infirmary, not knowing what he was even crying about other than the nauseating loneliness that weighed him down, pinning him to the bed.

Forcing his right hand to be the one to clumsily scrub away the tears - because it was going to work, dang it - he gritted his teeth and pushed against the weight to flop over onto his side.

Get over it. Get over it, get used to it, stop being such a baby. You’ve always known that this wouldn’t last. It’s a miracle they’ve stuck around for as long as they have. If you try to hang onto them they’ll just end up hating you before they leave.

He got away with hiding in the infirmary for two days before Fallenta declared him well enough to be up and about, and Shiro and Allura showed up with the Altean version of crutches. They escorted him slowly down the halls of the Castle to the dining room, chatting amiably the whole way. Keith assumed it was meant to either distract him from his plight, or to keep themselves from staring and pitying.

“Hey, look who finally decided to join us!” Lance announced loudly as soon as he hobbled into the room. “It’s about time you were out of bed, Mullet-head.”

“What Lance means,” Hunk sighed, “is that it’s good to see you up, Keith.”

“That it is, Number Four!” Coran rushed to pull out his usual seat, and his smile was so bright Keith couldn’t even be mad about the special treatment. “You had us all worried for a while there, for sure!”

Swallowing, Keith fiddled with his spork, unsure whether he was supposed to respond. “Um...yeah. Sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize, Keith.” Shiro smiled at him softly, knowingly. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

He just barely kept another ‘sorry’ from escaping. Instead he nodded, picked up his spork with his left hand, and changed the subject. “So, uh...wha’s been going on lately?”

That was all it took for everyone to launch into tales of short missions in the Lions, repairs on Red, and alliances with Tellima. Keith barely remembered to keep eating his goo as he watched all of the animated faces and gesturing hands with a small smile on his face. It was good to be back among his teammates. They were so unlike him in so many ways, it was no wonder that he had never really fit in with them. But he cared about them anyway. They might not feel the same way about him, but he was so glad that they had become a part of his life.

And now they wouldn’t be anymore. Scowling down into his bowl where no one would notice, he poked at the green goo. How did I let myself get so attached? Before Shiro, it had been many, many years since he had let himself care about anyone this much. He should have known better by then. Letting himself come to consider any person or place home was just setting himself up for heartbreak.

As much as he loved spending this last bit of time with them, he almost wished they would stop acting so natural, as if they weren’t getting ready to kick him out any day now. No one mentioned a search for a new paladin. No one said whether they were headed to Earth, or some other planet.

He wasn’t going to be able to stand the suspense for many more days. They needed to just get it over with.

Later that night, after waking from another nightmare back in his own room, Keith stared at the bare walls, so lifeless compared to the other paladin’s rooms. Maybe I was always prepared for this moment, after all. Or maybe he had just been kicked out and left behind so many times that the ability to settle in was impossible for him no matter where he went.

Struggling to sit up, he groped for the crutches and pulled himself to his feet. He wasn’t going to get back to sleep anytime soon, and no one had expressly forbidden him from venturing out on his own - not that it would have stopped him even if they had.

It took far too long to make it down the four hallways between his room and Red’s hangar. Walking with crutches used a whole new set of muscles that he wasn’t used to accessing, and trying to force his right side to carry that much weight was exhausting. He had to stop and lean against the wall, panting for breath, several times along the way.

But he made it, eventually. He paused once more outside the door, debating whether or not he was actually ready to see the damage done to Red, before he sucked it up and punched the scanner.

He wasn’t ready.

The great mechanical beast was lying on her side, a position that somehow managed to make her look vulnerable despite her hulking size. Her legs were splayed awkwardly as if she had just been dropped there. She probably had.

The worst part, though, was that her face was nearly unrecognizable. What had once been her muzzle was completely smashed in, there were spiderweb cracks across one of her dull grey eyes, and the other was missing altogether.

Actually, he took that back. The worst part was the cold and the silence.

No purr in his head to greet him. No eyes lighting up in recognition of her Paladin. No warmth filling up his chest and spreading out to his fingers and toes. With Red, there was always some kind of heat. Now, though, a shiver shook his body.

Clenching his jaw, Keith forced himself a few steps closer, until he could reach out, balancing precariously, and lay a hand against her warped, dented nose. It was cold, too.

Suddenly tears sprang to his eyes for the first time since his panic attack a couple of days before. “‘m sorry, Red.” He stroked his hand over the metal, feeling all of the bumps that shouldn’t have been there. “I’m sorry this happened to you. You didn’t deserve it. You...you’ve always protected me, and…”

Tipping his head back, he took in the mess of a cockpit again, and this time he saw flashes of his nightmare. Something sharp pinning him to the chair. Blood dripping onto the floor.

One tear escaped, sliding rapidly down to his chin. “I don’t even know how I survived this. But if either of us deserved to survive, it’s you. Please, Red...if you can hear me at all...please don’t give up. I know I...I can’t fly you anymore, but…”

It hit him then, the brutal truth of that statement. He’d never fly her again. He might never fly anything again. He’d known it ever since finding out what had happened to him, but now it stabbed him through the heart, how much he was going to miss this semi-sentient alien ship.

Before he knew it, he was falling none-too-gracefully to the floor, one hand planted in front of him while the other remained on her snout, crutches clattering loudly to the side. The tears came in earnest, then. “Red...Red I lost my leg. I...I can’t fight anymore, I can’t fly…I’m useless.”

He’d told her that before. That time, though, she had reassured him that no, he was her Paladin, he was a defender of the universe, not useless. Never useless.

But now there was no one to reassure him. Even if she had been able, Red would know the truth. He wasn’t her Paladin anymore, he wasn’t a defender of the universe. He was useless.

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eastofthemoon · 3 years ago

Text

A Paladin in the Fire Nation

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3

Rating: PG

Series: Voltron Legendary Defender/Avatar the Last Airbender

Summary: After the fight with Zarkon, Shiro accidentally gets tossed into another reality where humans have the ability to bend the elements. His best shot at returning home is with someone called the Avatar, while he waits he might as well take on the job of being the Firelord’s bodyguard.

-----------------------------------------------------

Zuko was silent as Shiro told them his story. He tried to keep an open mind these days and being close friends with the Avatar had caused Zuko to experience very strange things.

However, Zuko did have limits and Shiro’s tale was pushing them to the extreme.

“So you’re from another universe,” Sokka said slowly. “Where you go into space inside ships in the shape of lions, who are sentient and can become on a giant ship shaped like a person called Voltron, and fight an empire run by beings called Garlic.”

“Galra,” Shiro had corrected as Iroh poured himself another cup of tea, “but yes.”

“And you got here because your lion accidentally sent you here while you were fighting the emperor,” Toph added.

“Correct,” Shiro confirmed.

Toph and Sokka turned their faces to Zuko, likely waiting for his reaction. Zuko took a deep breath. “That is an..interesting tale.”

Shiro raised an eyebrow as Zuko stood and tucked his hands into his robes. “Toph, Sokka, may I speak with you in private for a moment?”

“You can use my bedroom and shut the door,” his uncle offered and by the sound of his tone had been expecting it.

“Thank you, Uncle, we’ll just be a moment,” Zuko said briskly.

Toph and Sokka followed close behind while Zuko was being very careful to not say a word until they were all inside and he shut the door.

“I’ll be the first to say it,” Zuko said as he turned to his friends, “he is insane, right?”

Much to his shock, neither of them instantly agreed. Instead, Toph was silent and Sokka waved a hand back and forth.

“Ehhhh, maybe but my gut is telling me no,” Sokka replied.

“You’re kidding,” Zuko said in disbelief. “Did you hear what he said? There’s no way for it to be true.”

“But that’s the thing,” Sokka said as he paced. “Look, a real criminal would probably try to come up with a reasonable explanation. Why would Shiro tell us that story unless it is the truth?”

“You’re saying it’s so crazy it has to be true?” Zuko asked.

“Exactly,” Sokka said with a nod. “Why even bother with telling us about giant lion ships if he assumed we wouldn’t believe it.”

“I’m with Sokka,” Toph said. “I monitored the guy’s heart during the whole time he talked, he’s not lying.”

“He could be good at lying,” Zuko argued. “You told me Azula is able to pass it.”

Sokka raised an eyebrow. “You honestly believe that Shiro guy is at Azula level of lying?”

Zuko opened and shut his mouth. He hadn’t even known Shiro for a day, but he had seemed confused by the interrogation earlier. It was possible the man was a very good actor, but still…

“It would also explain why his armor is so odd,” Sokka added, “and his arm too. Not even Teo and his dad have designs that advanced.”

“Plus, Iroh is taking him seriously,” Toph added. “That should say something too.”

Sokka touched Zuko’s shoulder. “Be honest, what do you feel in your gut about Shiro?”

Zuko shut his eyes. “My common sense is saying he’s delusional,” he sighed, “but my gut says he’s telling the truth.”

“So we are all in agreement then,” said Toph with a shrug. “Now what?”

“How about we start by telling Shiro we believe him?” Sokka offered.

Zuko nodded as he turned around and led them back. Iroh was pouring another cup of tea while Shiro watched them come back with concern in his eyes.

“We believe you,” Zuko stated and sighed. “Although a large part of me is calling me crazy for doing so.”

“I don’t blame you,” Shiro said with a nervous chuckle. “I would have a hard time in your position.”

“So then spaceman,” Toph said as she sat next to him, “how do you think you can get back home?”

“Yeah, if this Black Lion sent you here by accident can she just take care of it,” Sokka said as he and Zuko took their seats.

“I wish it were that easy,” Shiro said, “but I’m too far away for her to help even though I can still hear her.”

Zuko froze as he tilted his head. “You can..hear her?”

“In my head,” Shiro said as he tapped forehead. “We paladins form a connection with our lions and it allows us to communicate them with our minds.”

“I see,” Zuko said, trying to keep his voice calm while he felt his common sense glaring at him. What have I gotten myself into?

“Right, okay,” said Sokka who also sounded unsure as he crossed his arms. “Only person I can think of to help you is Aang.”

“That is what I was suggesting when you three entered,” Iroh said as he sipped his tea. “Since it sounds like at least some form of the Spirit World is parly how you came to be here.”

“I wouldn’t exactly call the Astral Plane a spirit world,” Shiro replied as he rubbed his neck, “but I can’t deny it isn’t that either.”

It certainly felt like a place where spirits could dwell.

Toph sucked the air between her teeth. “Yeah, well, you’re going to have to wait awhile since Aang is dealing with settling some disputes over in the Earth Kingdom.”

Zuko sighed but nodded. Some of the towns had been former Fire Nation colonies that had been given back, but the previous Lord it had belonged to had died and so his twin sons were currently arguing on who the towns now belonged to.

“He is supposed to come straight here when he’s finished,” Zuko replied firmly, “but it’s hard to tell how long as it takes.”

“I see,” Shiro said with a sigh. “If you can recommend where I can stay I would greatly appreciate it.” His frown tightened. “Also possibly where I can make some money since I have nothing to pay-”

“No need for either since you’ll stay here as our guest,” Iroh said.

Zuko choked slightly as he shot his uncle a look. We barely know him and you want him to stay in the palace?

Iroh slightly glanced at Zuko before sipping his tea. “Given your circumstance, I’m sure our GENEROUS Firelord would be more than happy to accommodate you until we can figure out how to get you home.”

Zuko twitched an eye and wanted to argue, but Sokka grabbed his shoulder and whispered into his ear.

“I get your concern, but it’s probably better if he stays here since I doubt we want a ton of people finding out we got a person from another world just dropped into our laps,” Sokka muttered.

Zuko frowned, but gave a slow nod. A lot of people would dismiss it, but there were a few that would probably try to use it to their advantage and there were a few former FIre Nation nobles he rather kept that information away from.

“Alright,” Zuko said as he tucked his hands into his sleeves, “although we’ll have to think of an explanation as to why I’m suddenly treating the intruder as a guest.”

“Just say it was a prank I pulled that went wrong,” Toph said with a shrug.

Shiro raised an eyebrow. “You expect the guards to believe that a mysterious intruder was all just a prank pulled by you?”

Zuko narrowed his eyes before sighing and massaging his forehead. “After the Badgermole and Groundpecker incident, they would.”

Shiro blinked. “The what?”

Sokka sighed. “Don’t ask, trust me.”

Zuko nodded in agreement.

---------------------------------------------------------------

Once Zuko had announced Shiro was a guest, he and Sokka escorted Shiro to a guest chamber. It wasn’t nearly as big as Iroh’s room, but Shiro was just grateful to not have to return to his cell.

The rest of the day passed by rather quickly. Iroh told Shiro he would get him some more clothes in the meantime, and Zuko had his armour returned to Shiro. He assumed it was a lost cause, but Shiro attempted to see if he could contact the paladins through his helmet. Much to his chagrin, all he heard was static.

It was killing Shiro to not be there with his team. They were probably all worried if he was dead, Keith especially. Shiro hated that he was putting him through this again, but it wasn’t as if he had a choice.

He briefly wondered if the Black Lion could just send a message that he was still alive, but Keith’s connection with the Black Lion wasn’t deep enough for that yet. Which meant, all Shiro could do was wait and hope this Avatar would be able to get him home.

Shiro tried not to dwell on this as he ate dinner. Zuko and Iroh had other duties to attend to, but Sokka and Toph joined him. They were energetic, but they seemed to be good kids. Truth be told, Sokka reminded him a lot of Lance, and he wasn’t sure if the two met if they would get along or butt heads as a result.

Shiro didn’t stay with them long. He was exhausted both from the day, and it hadn’t even been a full 24 hours since his life or death battle with Zarkon. So, Shiro went to bed early.

It hadn’t taken long for him to sleep, and it would have been restful if not for the nightmare.

Shiro was back at the Castle of Lion. He wasn’t sure how, but it was wrong.

The lights were off and everywhere there was nothing except darkness.

And no sign of any of his friends.

Shiro ran through the halls. “KEITH! PIDGE! ALLURA!”

He called out but no one responded.

“HUNK! LANCE! CORAN!” Shiro ran through the endless hall. “ SOMEONE ANSWER ME!”

He reached the control room and barged inside.

Shiro froze.

Allura, Coran, and all of the paladins lay motionless on the ground.

The only one who was standing was Zarkon as he wiped the blood off his sword.

“You took too long to come home, Paladin,” Zarkon scoffed as he slowly approached.

Shiro told his feet to run, but they remained planted. His body wouldn’t move.

“Your friends are dead because of you,” Zarkon continued as he raised his sword. “Now you shall share their fate.”

The sword lowered for his head.

Shiro gasped for air as he sprang up in his bed. Sweat dripped off his forehead as Shiro felt his heart pounding in his chest.

“Just a dream,” he muttered to himself. “Just a dream. They’re alright.”

For now, he thought darkly. But they could get killed tomorrow while you're stuck here all nice and safe.

Shiro grip tight on his bed sheets. Once he felt his heart calm down, he scrubbed his hand over his face.

“No way I’m going back to sleep,” he muttered.

If he was back at the castle, he would do some reading or go to the training room for practice. Shiro sighed as he tossed off the sheets.

I’ll go for a walk, Shiro thought. Maybe I can find a quiet place to do some training exercises.

He threw on some clothes and went out into the hall. Shiro headed towards the gardens. Iroh had said he would be free to go there and it seemed the most likely place where Shiro could be alone. He couldn’t see anyone being there this early.

The sun was just starting to rise as Shiro ventured outside. He didn’t see anyone in the garden, except for the ducks in the pond.

At least Shiro thought they were ducks.

The creatures certainly had heads and bodies of ducks, but upon closer inspection they seemed to have turtle shells on their backs.

“Turtle ducks?” Shiro muttered as he kneeled.

A small turtle duck glanced up curiously at him and quacked.

“You are actually not the weirdest creature I’ve ever seen,” Shiro admitted.

The turtle duck tilted it’s head, and then quacked once more before swimming away.

“I didn’t mean it as an insult,” Shiro said with a grin.

“What are you doing here?”

Shiro jumped slightly, and rose back up as he turned around to see Zuko.

He looked different. Zuko’s hair was loose and not as neatly tied up like earlier, and he seemed to be wearing more casual robes.

“Oh, uh, sorry,” Shiro said as he rubbed his neck. “I couldn’t get back to sleep and was looking for a place to train.” He then gave a frown. “Why are you up so early?”

Zuko’s eyes narrowed. “I am a firebender, and thus the optimal time to train is when the sun rises.”

“QUACK!”

Zuko froze.

Shiro glanced downward.

A small turtle duck quacked again before using its beak to tug on Zuko’s pant leg. It was only then Shiro noticed a small piece of bread in the Firelord’s hand.

Zuko sighed as he kneeled and tore off a piece of the bread.

“It..is also the best time to feed the turtle ducks,” Zuko muttered while blushing.

Another quack was heard when the turtle duck snatched the bread, gobbled it up and spirited towards the pond.

“I see,” Shiro said as he did his best to repress a smile, but couldn’t resist a small chuckle.

Zuko glared. “You find this funny do you?”

Shiro shook. “No, no, sorry,” he said quickly. “It’s just you look like my friend Keith when I caught him feeding some squirrels.”

He thought back to it. It had been Keith’s birthday, and Shiro had taken him into town to celebrate. They had ended up wandering into a park. Shiro had gone to get them some ice cream, only to discover Keith had been tossing some peanuts towards a squirrel.

Shiro may have quietly taken a photo on his phone before Keith realized he had been caught and blushed bright red.

Zuko frowned in response. “You mean rabbit squirrels?”

Shiro’s chuckles paused as he tilted his head. “Um..no squirrels.”

Zuko raised an eyebrow as the turtle duck finished the rest of the bread. “Your world must be very weird.”

Shiro held up his hands. “Look, I didn’t mean to invade your privacy. I’ll just leave.”

Zuko tossed the rest of the bread to a nearby duck and dusted the crumbs off his hands.

“It’s fine,” Zuko said as he stood. “I was about to leave anyway. There’s paperwork I wanted to get taken care of. You can use the garden if you like.”

“Um, thank you,” Shiro said, “and not just for the garden, but for also letting me stay here.”

“I’m not the one you should be thanking,” Zuko said as he crossed his arms. “That should go towards Uncle, Sokka and Toph for convincing me.”

“But it was still your decision in the end,” Shiro replied. “I realize it can’t be easy letting a stranger into your home.”

“It’s not,” Zuko said as he crossed his arms. “Frankly, I’m still suspicious of you.”

Shiro suddenly thought of Keith, who he knew would have had the same response as Zuko.

“Why are you smiling?” Zuko asked.

“Sorry,” Shiro replied. “You just remind me a lot of my friend Keith. He would have agreed with you.”

He couldn’t resist wondering if the two would get along.

“Then your friend is smart,” Zuko said as he turned his back to Shiro. “I’ll send a servant to fetch you when it’s time for breakfast.”

“You don’t have to-” Shiro began, but paused.

There was a metallic glint shone in the bushes. Why would there be-

Adrenaline and panic struck as Shiro dashed forward. “GET DOWN!”

He shoved Zuko to the ground and remained on top of him as an arrow flew over their heads.

“You okay?” Shiro asked as he and Zuko scrambled back to their feet.

“Ask our attackers that,” Zuko snapped and launched a ball of flame at the bushes.

There was a yelp and two men with scorched clothing tumbled out, one of them holding a bow.

“I don’t know who you are,” Zuko declared, “but surrender now and I promise you’ll be treated fairly.”

The archer snarled and prepared to launch another arrow.

“Oh no you don’t,” Zuko said as he charged and with fire burning in both his fists. The archer dropped the bow and pulled out a sword.

Shiro could only assume Zuko could handle it as the other attacker decided to rush at Shiro with a dagger. He dodged, grabbed the dagger with his cybernetic arm and twisted it out of the man’s hand before kicking him away.

The man stumbled, but quickly regained his balance. He glared at Shiro, and then stomped his foot to the ground. Instantly, spikes popped from the ground and headed straight towards him.

Shiro jumped and rolled on the ground just barely avoiding the spikes. He panted as he leaned on his knees.

“Wild guess, but I take it you’re an earth bender?” he shouted.

“Oh gee, aren’t you smart,” the man sneered as he raised his arm.

A small spike rose out of the dirt, only for it to harden as the man reached for it and snapped it off the ground.

The earth bender charged again.

Shiro sprang to his feet in time to block and flip the man, but not before he felt the spike cut at his normal arm.

He hissed as blood dripped slightly.

Really wish I had my armor on right now, Shiro grumbled.

Flashes came from fighting hand to hand. Having to ignore every cut, every broken bone and keep fighting.

No, no, not now, Shiro thought as he shook his head at the memories. It wasn’t the time.

Shiro looked up. The man had crashed against a tree, but was already getting back up. A battle cry caused Shiro to look over to Zuko. The young Firelord was holding his own, but the archer wasn’t slowing down with each swipe of the sword.

“Do the world a favor and die with your father!” the archer snapped as he tried to slice at Zuko’s head, but missed as the boy ducked.

Shiro heard movement and managed to block the earth bender by gripping his wrists stopping the spike just inches away towards his face.

Shiro grunted and realized Zuko was closer to him now as an idea came.

“Zuko,” Shiro called out, “I think these two should face each other instead!”

Zuko abruptly turned, frowned and gave a nod signaling he got the meaning. Swiftly, Zuko yanked the archer’s arm, and tossed him over just as Shiro did the same with the earth bender.

It was satisfying watching the pair collide into each other and fall into the pond.

Shiro dashed to Zuko’s side. “You alright?”

Zuko brushed the hair from his eyes and gestured to Shiro’s arm. “I should be asking you that.”

Shiro glanced at his arm and gripped the wound. “I’ve had worse.”

Zuko looked ready to say something, until the attackers climbed out of the pond. Both of them were dripping wet and eyes full of fury.

Shiro and Zuko got into fighting position, but suddenly mounds of earth sprang up and trapped the attackers with only their heads poking out.

Shiro blinked, but saw Zuko glanced over and spotted Toph who was now retracting her hand.

“You guys got into a fight and didn’t invite me?” she shouted.

“It was hardly planned,” Zuko snapped.

“Whatever,” Toph muttered as she walked over to them. “Everyone okay?”

“Shiro’s injured,” Zuko replied and sighed, “and he also saved me from getting an arrow through my head.” He slowly looked up and rubbed his neck. “Thanks for that.”

“Welcome,” Shiro said as he gripped his arm, “and it’s not that bad.”

“I think a doctor will be a better judge of that,” Toph replied as she crossed her arms.

Shiro opened his mouth but was cut off by a yawn.

“Okay,” Sokka muttered as he stumbled out, “why was there such a ruckus-”

He spotted the trapped angry men, blinked and then looked to the group. “What did I miss?”

“Nothing good,” Zuko muttered grimly.

Shiro nodded. He might not be in a war, but he had landed right in the middle of a lot of trouble.

#vldgen #atla #a paladin in the fire nation #vld #takashi shirogane #my writing

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voltron-for-ever · 3 years ago

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🎃 Whumptober 2021 🎃

First | previous | next

No. 7 - MY SPIDEY-SENSE IS TINGLING

helplessness | numbness | blindness

@whumptober2021

@whumptober-archive

⚠️ Read the tags for warnings ⚠️ ——————————————————

The air was laced with an eerie silence. Keith couldn't hear or see anything, his mind was running in overdrive trying to figure out what happened. The last thing he remembers is being on Olkarion with shiro, they had just finished a mission.

Slowly but surely Keith could hear someone saying his name over and over. He mumbled out a "Shiro" before attempting to open his eyes. It felt as though they where glued shut, he reached a hand up towards his eyes. Soft fabric met the hand he'd raised to his eyes, bandages maybe but why ?

Shiro- Try not to touch them, I just bandaged them so you don't damage them more.

Keith- Why did you bandage them ? What happened ?

Shiro's face moved into a deep frown, Keith didn't remember what had happened. Shiro carefully took Keith's hand in his own and smoothed his thumb over Keith knuckles.

——————— Shiro's memory ———————

Keith and Shiro had just finished a mission on Olkarion and where taking off in there lions when both where shot with huge ion cannons. Both lions crashed to the ground. Both of them ran to a near by building.

BOOM !

Shiro's ears were ringing as he scrambled to his feet looking around for Keith. The smell of ash filled the air, smoke flew around him. As his ears stopped ringing he heard the screams, Keith was hurt. Badly ...

His eyes where dripping with blood, his face was covered in cuts and his skin was awfully pale. Shiro attempted to shush the boy with little success. He carried the whimpering Keith back to the black lion where he found the first aid kit Coran had given him.

Damn it ! The comms In the black lion where down, of course they where !

Shiro was no medic or healing pod but he did what he could. He pulled the screaming boy into his lap and gently began to wipe away the already drying blood running from his eyes. Once he'd cleaned the blood he grabbed a bandage roll and lifted the boys head and wrapped the bandages around his head. His heart shattered listening to the younger boy he sees as a brother screaming out in pain. He remembers a syringe Coran told him about, one that takes the pain away completely. How could he have been so foolish, so cruel. He quickly injected Keith with the syringe, the screams come to a sudden end ...

Keith lays still in the gentle hold of his brother. Shiro places his ear to Keith's chest that rises and falls evenly now. His heart beat has significantly slowed back to a more normal pace. Shiro places Keith on the bed in the black lion and sits patently next to it.

—————— Shiro's memory end ——————

Keith finds himself being pulled gently into the larger mans arms as he feels himself start to shake.

Shiro- It's going to be ok Keith, I'm sure the others will come looking for us soon enough.

Keith- O.. ok Shiro, just don't go anywhere ok ?

Shiro- I'm not leaving you Keith, I promise.

Shiro kept that promise, him and Keith have been in the black lion for almost a week waiting for Ryner to get the comms up and running again. Shiro just hoped that was sooner rather than later.

The syringe Shiro had given Keith was starting to wear off and Keith's pain grew significantly over the last few hours. Without a healing pod Shiro was unsure of the damage done to Keith's eyes. He was also worried how without the proper care, how would this affect his sight. He didn't know and honestly he wasn't sure he wanted to know.

Finally after three more days the other paladins arrived on Olkarion. Coran was the first to rush through the black lion straight over to Keith. He stiffened slightly at the sudden touch of coran's hand but relaxed once he hear him speak. Allura followed soon after with the other three paladins trailing in after her.

Sometime later Keith exited the pod falling into Shiro's arms. He opened his eyes slowly, afraid to open them fully.

Everything was blurry and a few tears escaped his eyes ...

They could fix this ... right ...?

[ Word count -700]

I made a picture to go with this one | Here |

#whumptober 2021 #no.7 #blindness #voltron ledgendary defender #vld #fan fiction #fic #Trigger warning #explosion #blood mention #Injection #syringe #keith voltron #keith whump #voltron whump #voltron fanfic

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im-definitely-not-trash · 3 years ago

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Here’s day three, thankfully on time. :) I tried to do less dialogue because my stories usually rely on dialogue a lot and I wanted to try something different.

Prompt #3: “Who did this to you?”

Fandom: Voltron: Legendary Defender

TW: referenced self-harm, infected injuries

Word count: 1536

Lance and Pidge were chilling playing video games. As they laughed at a characters death, Lance elbowed Pidge’s left arm playfully. She winced, quietly enough no one would hear, but Lance saw her face scrunch up in pain. He dropped the controller and pulled up her sleeve to her shoulder, Pidge protesting the whole time, trying to wiggle away. There were three long scratches on her upper arm, scabbed over and starting to scar, but Lance could see that they had been deep.

“Who did this to you?” he asked.

Pidge went quiet, shuffling away and pulling her sleeve down. Then she just stood up and walked out of the closet. Lance called after her, but she didn’t listen.

~~~

Over the next few days, Lance noticed that Pidge was treating him differently. She was fine around literally everyone else, but she hung out with Kosmo more than him. It was as if he’d done something to offend her, not worrying about her and what happened to her arm.

He tried several times to confront her again, wanting to find out why she was treating him like a disease and also to figure out what had happened and who had done it. But every time, she just ignored him and locked herself in her room so he couldn’t get to her.

Lance considered talking to Shiro about it, but ultimately decided against that. He wouldn’t have a clue what was going on. So he decided to leave her alone until she came back to be friends again.

~~~

His waiting time was cut short after about a week when Pidge showed up to breakfast looking exhausted and kind of green. She left her arm hanging by her side while she ate breakfast goo with her right hand. Her hand shook as she ate and Lance had to bite his tongue to not mention it in front of everyone. But after she excused herself without eating even half of her bowl, he knew something was way worse than it was before and he couldn’t just leave her to her own devices anymore.

He followed her out of the kitchen and snuck into her room with her (what a mess). She went into her bathroom, and Lance tried to watch through the crack in the door and the mirror what she was doing.

Pidge pulled her arm out of her sleeve, biting her lip to avoid making noise as tears spilled over. The three cuts in her arm had seemingly grown bigger, and they were discolored and oozing. Lance couldn’t take it anymore. He threw the door open, making Pidge jump.

“Come on, Pidge, who in the quiznak did this to you?? I’m going to kill who did this, I can’t believe anyone would hurt you! And why didn’t you ask for help at all?! It’s been at least a week that you’ve been hurt, and I know you haven’t said anything to anyone, and it’s pissing me off!”

Pidge was sobbing now, lightly grabbing her arm to curl up in a ball.

“Pidgey, I want to help you! Everyone does! Who did this?! We can’t just let someone like this to roam free to hurt anyone else. Just tell m—”

Pidge cried. “It was me!”

Lance shut up very quickly.

“You?” he asked in a whisper.

The tears wouldn’t stop streaming. “It distracts me, and I didn’t mean for it to get this bad, but I can’t stop thinking about Matt and my dad and my mom whenever Zarkon is going to make his way to Earth to hurt her and anyone else, and I can’t keep pretending that I’m not worried because I am but if I was worried, it would distract me from being a Paladin and so I needed to distract myself from getting distracted and when I distracted myself by my own terms it made it easier to fulfill my tasks as a Paladin, but it got bad and now I don’t know what to do because I can’t let anyone know and I’m still upset that you know and—”

“Pidge.”

She shook while looking at Lance. “What?”

The way her voice sounded, crackly and tired, made Lance want to cry too.

“We can help you. You don’t have to keep anything a secret from us. We can find other ways to distract you to focus, if that’s what you really need. But please, please, don’t hurt yourself as a distraction.”

Pidge sat stiff for a second, then just broke down crying again. Lance gathered her into a hug, carefully avoiding her arm.

“Can I tell the others, please?”

Pidge shook her head.

“Then can you tell them?”

She shook her head more frantically.

“They need to know, Pidgey.”

Her voice was muffled in Lance’s shirt. “They’ll think I’m not a real Paladin. I’m not worthy for it.”

“Shut the quiznak up, Pidge, you just told me you were doing this to be able to focus in the first place! And apparently it worked, at least until recently because of the infection. Now, call me a psychopath, but I’m glad the cuts got infected.”

Pidge went quiet again, stifling her sobs, but still shaking against Lance.

“Pidge, can we at least tell Coran? We need to treat the cuts.”

She was silent for a minute, then finally said, “Okay.”

“Okay. Good.”

Lance felt her grab onto him. “Can we stay here for a minute though?” she asked.

“Of course.”

~~~

When she told other Paladins as a group, they refrained from smothering Pidge because they could see how ashamed she was. But that didn’t stop them from individually going to talk to her.

Hunk was the first who showed up. He knocked on her door and came in when invited. They talked for a long time, Hunk telling her he somewhat knew how she felt but he wasn’t invalidating her experience. He asked if making foods from home would help, or make it worse, and she laughed, saying it would help and be delicious. His helpful distraction was food.

Allura showed up next. Once invited in, she simply asked if she could give Pidge a hug, and they sat together for a while. They talked about random things while always touching, and made plans for just the two girls to follow through with, no boys allowed. Allura’s helpful distraction was physical comfort.

Coran came in without permission, but he thought it was okay because it’s technically his castle. He joked with Pidge about anything he could think of, and sincerely asked where milkshakes came from if not from Kaltenecker herself. Pidge laughed at almost anything he said, and tried her hardest to explain how cows (and mammals in general) work. Coran’s helpful distraction was his natural humor.

Lance had already gone in several times, in between everyone, trying to not leave Pidge alone. If she wasn’t alone, she’d be distracted. Pidge understood the real reason why he was spending so much time with her, to prevent her from going back to her unhealthy distraction, but she appreciated it anyway. They played card and video games, talked, had spa nights, and did basically anything at anytime. His helpful distraction was quality time.

Keith came in and just sat on her desk while she sat on her bed. Pidge occupied herself messing with some gadget, and Keith awkwardly sat, waiting for the right moment. When he finally started talking, Pidge almost jumped. He explained how after he was left alone, sometimes his mind would run wild and he wasn’t able to focus on surviving. Even in the space cadet program at the Garrison, he had to distract himself so he could focus on being a pilot. He had chosen the same way, and he thought for sure that it was helping. Keith showed her his scars on the back of his wrists and the inside of his elbow. He told her how he lost sleep over it because his arms always hurt and his attitude got worse until he got kicked out. He had to distract himself more to avoid thinking about how disappointed Shiro would be and how he would live by himself. It wasn’t until he had gotten invested in finding what turned out to be the Blue Lion that he had stopped. He offered his help in the way that she could ask for literally anything, help cleaning her room, someone to talk to, anything that he didn’t have in that period. Keith’s helpful distraction was himself.

Shiro was the last to confront Pidge about anything. And confront her he did. He didn’t offer any distraction, only a listening ear so she could face what was always on her mind. Shiro understood more than anyone, because he was with Matt and her dad, and he left someone on Earth. And because of how he knew that, he knew that she needed to face it as well as distract when it was appropriate. He was helpful by not offering her a distraction.

And with all of these people around her, so willing to help, Pidge knew she’d be okay and she’d be able to work harder and in turn, defeat the Galra.

She can do it.

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toastess-with-the-mostess · 1 year ago

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Let's Rewind! Toast watches Voltron: Defender of The Universe (1984)

Season 1, Episode 10: Secret of the White Lion

Two minutes in, and we already get to see this lion that Haggar apparently made Her plan is to manipulate the fuck out of Allura in her dreams, so this will be fun

The mice sleep in the chandelier in Allura's room, that's so cute

Allura fell asleep with her crown on, that's gotta be really uncomfy princess

Her nightmare starts off with her fighting and running from Drule troops before she gets hit and then sees her dead mom I can see the resemblance, also I can't tell if that's her crown or not but if it is then that's a cool design

I wonder if the braids mean something on Arus, Allura has similar braids when her hair is down but only like one strip of it Maybe it's her status of availability? For being courted and all

Ah it's Haggar as her mom telling her to look for that lion every time I look at her eyes Allura's mom looks so apathetic LMAO

Now she's woken up after hearing her dad's voice and is runs to a balcony as a weird lion hallucination is telling her to go into the woods Man I know that she's really missing her dad but the woods?? At this time of night?? DANGEROUS

Now we have some actual guards stationed at the castle, not like they actually stopped her from running into the forest but hey extra security!

I wonder if Arus follows that one belief in our history where royalty is all chosen by God or is a god Allura kind of makes me think that she's worshiping her dad with how intent she is on following his lead alone

Nanny sounds the alarms after she can't find Allura and is told she ran into the woods, but the guys don't think anything is wrong I feel like they should worry more especially because Coran and Nanny wouldn't dare let her out alone

Hunk complains about beauty sleep and Lance fucking murders him by telling him it'd never make him beautiful

Off to find the princess in their lions! Whose currently getting really cuddly with that white lion

Lance finds her and is just drilling into her goddamn Telling her how nuts the situation is but Allura is still thoroughly in the manipulation right now

And now he's tied up after the lion somehow roared rope on him, interesting power I guess

omg the little hop, PIDGE JUST KEEPS GETTING CUTER I CAN'T HANDLE THIS

Pidge getting stuck in rope by the lion too is very unfortunate, now Keith and Hunk have to save THREE people Never mind make that four because now Keith is the only one left untied

Aaand Allura fainted again I'll let this one slide only because it's a lion fully roaring in her face, so I can understand that level of fear

uh,, interesting image

And it's the lion's true form has been revealed, not too bad of a design but why do all the robeasts have chicken legs

This robeasts official name is Loathsome Lion, not too creative on this front. He has a fang katana, full-body titan armor, breastplate gatling rockets, and a razor fiber mane

oh hey they actually say its name in this episode! I thought these were named only in the 30th anniversary book

Lance is almost beheaded before Keith decides to reappear, it's one on one battle time

Oh shit a win for Nanny and Coran, they get into blue to try and save the team horrible flying mixed with Nanny being thrashed everywhere isn't good, she accidentally activates a water gun and washes away both Haggar AND the princess

Keith dives in the nearby river to go save Allura from drowning Nanny and Coran try to stop her from getting into blue but obvs she goes in anyway, apparently her uniform was in there too so good that she got a change of clothes at least

Oop Haggar is still manipulating her by flashing Allura's mother's face on the robeast as she tries to attack it and now she's caught, I don't blame her for this one that was a fucked up thing to see

Keith is also drilling into her saying that she needs to get it through her head as it's neither of her parents, I get it but also stop being rude when telling her the truth You can be blunt without being mean asshole

Robeast defeated, back to the castle for Allura to look at her mother's grave I wonder if only kings get put into tombs in the castle, or is Allura's mom not actually royalty and got buried outside because of that that'd be a source for Allura angst :0

Nanny says that she and Coran will take over blue for Allura after the danger she was in but Allura shoots that down and continues as a pilot

Episode end! This was a fun one actually, again I really do like it when the bad guys start acting smart, it really shows what they're capable of

#voltron #voltron dotu #voltron defender of the universe #80s voltron #toast talks #let's rewind!

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dammitadolfnomorecake · 2 years ago

Text

It was the little things prt5

Scene: Shiro (Kuron) raises his voice one too many times and Lance breaks trying to do better

Premise: Lance’s Papi was an abusive drunk. Please don’t read this one if you’re easily triggered. Lance has panic attacks. He tries to hide them. Catching Keith at the wrong time pushes him over. Before Keith leaves for the Blades. Angst. Langst. Hurt with unexpected comfort. Secret dating where Lance has been hiding a huge part of his past.

Taking Lance down to his room, his boyfriend made a beeline for Keith’s bed. Sitting on the edge of it, Lance didn’t calm down until Keith had picked up his bayard, forcing himself to do the lamest thing he’d ever done and shoot his boyfriend finger guns. It was worth it to see Lance smile. Leaving him there, he knew Lance would stay put, not only because of the fatigue, but because he was trusting him to take care of things like he’d asked him to do.

Making his way up to the training room, he was the last to arrive. Pidge and Hunk both in their pyjamas, with Pidge looking extra “glarey” about the before breakfast training. Their resident gremlin was cranky when she didn’t start her day with the space version of coffee. Allura’s smile faltered as she turned from talking to Shiro to look at him

“Keith, are you alright? You look very tired”

“I am. Actually, about training…”

Shiro pinched the bridge of his nose, standing behind Allura

“Let me guess, Lance has better things to do? I suppose you caught him sleeping in and he’s running late?”

Now that’d been pointed out, Keith saw how demoralising Shiro being cranky towards Lance must have been for him. Adding to his annoyance, Allura giggled

“He does love his sleep. Should I call him again?”

“Yes, please, Princess. We can’t afford to lay about even when it comes to training. We need to be prepared. The Galra would hardly wait for Lance to finish his beauty sleep”

Pidge went to take a step towards Shiro, Hunk grabbing her by the arm and towing her backwards. Looking livid, Keith was glare her rage wasn’t directed at him, yet he still had to handle this careful and not give Pidge the chance to start yelling

“Actually, none of us will be training this morning. I’ve sent Lance to rest, and I think we should all take the day to rest too”

Allura’s expression turned to confusion, smile gone

“May I ask why? Is he alright?”

Shiro didn’t seem to care, following up on Allura’s question

“Keith, what are you talking about? We saw him last night”

Pidge went to lunge out of Hunk’s hold, only to be held back. Hunk covering her mouth before she made things worse, giving a nod to Keith as he did

“Lance tripped while training last night and broke his wrist. He was trying to work on his hand to hand skills, when he fell. It was an accident, completely unintentional on his behalf. We talked and seeing it was clearly broken we made the decision he should use the pod in the medbay. He’s sleeping off the affects”

Allura let out a little gasp as her had came up to her mouth, immediately asking

“Is he okay? Is he out of the pod already Some of these levels can be quite tricky, and you humans are fearfully fragile even with your strange ears”

Keith didn’t know what ears had to do with things, but he made a mental note to tell Lance

“Yeah. He’s a bit embarrassed about all the fuss and felt really bad about it all. He wanted to come to training, but I told him he needs to sleep. I’m assuming everyone is okay with that?”

Hunk nodded, Pidge licking his hand as he seemed to have forgotten he was covering her mouth. Pulling his hand away, Hunk scrunched his nose up in disgust at Pidge’s actions. Pidge elbowing him lightly, before also nodding

“Like I was trying to say, I think we all need a day off. No offence, Princess. You can boss us around all you like tomorrow, but if the Galra showed up, I’m not sure I won’t hold the door open and let them in without meaning to. Besides, this is Lance. He’s a goofball, but if it needed a pod, then we all know it was something serious, right?”

Allura sighed softly

“Sometimes I do wish he wasn’t, but I believe you’re quite right. Keith, are you sure he’s okay? I mean… you two do fight quite often…”

“That’s only because they don’t want anyone knowing… mghshsh”

Hunk covered Pidge’s mouth again before she put her foot in it. Pidge actually looking kind of grateful as she slumped in his hold. Shiro, however, wasn’t about to let what she had said get out

“That’s only because they’re what? Keith, is there something you’re not telling us?”

There were a lot of somethings… and none of it he felt like sharing

“Lance and I are friends… I guess I get how it looks, but it’s not the same… He… he was really there for me when you disappeared again… and he really stepped up to help me with things. I don’t know why you’re so hard on him, but my brother would never bully anyone”

Shiro’s eyes widened, as he drew his brow looking insulted

“I don’t know what he’s said…”

“He hasn’t said anything. You didn’t ask how he was, and you saw how bad his wrist looked last night. And you assumed he was being lazy. I mean, he does love to sleep and probably would if we left him alone… but he’s our Red Paladin. He’d be the first to be encouraging us to rest if we’d been the one who’d had the accident. He was so scared of letting you down that he tripped over backwards when he was already in pain. Yes, we need to train, but not today”

“He was scared of me?”

“He was scared of letting you down. I think we’re all scared of letting each other down. And I think we’re only going to have another accident on our hands if we try training like this. Allura, it’s alright if we skip training today, isn’t it?”

Allura nodded quickly

“I’m in agreement. You, Pidge, and Hunk look positively exhausted. I’m not sure what I should do. Should I visit Lance? What do you humans do?”

“He’s fine, he just needs to sleep it off. I’ve been told yet again that post-pod brain is a real thing. I’m going to catch up on my sleep too”

Raising the hand not still covering Pidge’s mouth, Hunk cleared his throat as he shifted his weight nervously

“Uh, I don’t know about you guys, but it’s been a while since we had a movie night? Maybe a bit of team bonding would be good for us?”

Allura clapped her hands together lightly, practically beaming at the idea

“That sounds excellent. If I’m honest, I too was not in the mood for training this morning. Perhaps Lance could make us one of those milkshake things? Or you, Hunk?”

Hunk “resisted” Allura fluttering her eyelashes with laugh

“Leave it to me, Princess. Pidge will get us set up movie wise. I’m thinking a late lunch, then snacks?”

Everyone looked to him, apart from Shiro who still seemed to be attempting to process no one was training. Lance would have known what to say. Instead Keith shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans and tried not to be too awkward now his almost adrenaline filled confidence boost over protecting Lance’s honour had worn off

“Sounds good to me. I mean… uh, even the Black Paladin could use a day off. I’m sure Lance will be up for face masks and that. I’m going to head back to bed guys. Thanks for not making a big deal out of this. Pidge, you and Hunk make sure you guys get some rest too”

Leaving the training room, Keith wasn’t surprised that Shiro jogged after him

“Keith, wait”

This time Keith took a page out of Shiro’s book, counting to three before turning to face his brother

“What’s up?”

“I… Have I really been going that hard on you guys?”

Well it was more Lance that Shiro seemed to have some invisible problem with. Shiro was a lot like Lance and didn’t like to share his trauma

“A bit. Honestly, I’m more confused by you than I am by Lance. He really needed us last night”

“I realise that now”

“I’m going to be blunt. I don’t want to be the Black Paladin. I had no idea what you were thinking by telling me to take over. But Lance is the only reason I managed to keep sane after you disappeared again. He might not be as smart as Pidge or as handy with a blade as us, but he’s important as a friend and team member”

“He doesn’t seem to be taking this seriously. I worry that it’s going to lead to him in a situation out of his control”

Speaking of seriously, Shiro was seriously annoying him

“Everything he does is him trying to keep us going. I know it’s hard for you to come back and have no idea what happened. All of us were really scared when you simply disappeared. But one look at his wrist should have told you that he needed help, and even if it had been on purpose, then that should have been something we sat down and discussed after he’d been healed. He was in so much pain he was scared. Lance might laugh and joke about everything, but the serious stuff he knows how to be serious about. If you need someone to talk to, you can talk to me. You’re my brother. And I would do anything for you. Even if I’m really quiznakking mad at you right now”

“Keith, I’m sorry…”

With his own feelings more than hurt, Keith gave a shake of his head

“No. Lance is my friend. I don’t want you to apologise to me. Last night I barely recognised you. I think you need to talk to someone about what you’ve been through. If it can’t be me, then you should try talking to Coran. Or to all of us. You know, I opened up to Lance. He didn’t laugh. He got mad. He got mad about the things that happened… as if it’d happened to him. He’s taking all of this seriously. I think you should apologise and explain why you’re so tough on him. I think you’ll both feel better if you can talk about it. I stayed up waiting for him to come out of the pod, so I’m going to lay down, because you know Lance always makes sure that none of us wake up from going in alone. You should get some rest too, I know your insomnia had you up late”

“What about you?”

“I’m not okay, but I’m going to be. I’ll see you later”

Lance had given into the post-pod tiredness by the time Keith got back. Taking off his boots, and Lance’s, he slid in carefully behind his boyfriend, cuddling up to Lance as he let his eyes slide shut. Keith was pretty sure he’d never had to talk so much in his life. People were exhausting, even the people he cared about.

Sleeping heavily, when he woke, Lance was already awake. His boyfriend had rolled over, and now he was wrapped up in Lance’s hold as Lance played with his hair. Keith wasn’t sure that Lance didn’t have some kind of hair fetish seeing his boyfriend always seemed to start playing with it when they were in bed

“5 more minutes?”

“Isn’t that what I always say to you?”

It was, and that’s exactly why he’d said it

“Mhmm… How are you feeling?”

“Not great. I’m still sorry. And I’m worrying about you”

“I know you are. I’m… I don’t know”

“It… I’ve brought up stuff for you too”

“Yeah”

“I never wanted you to know how bad it was… I mean, I wanted to tell you, but I also know what trauma is like. I was so proud when you felt you could tell me. And I felt like shit for hiding it from you. I… I get panic attacks some times”

“I do to. You’ve seen them”

Lance kissed his forehead, finally bringing his hand to a stop, fingers tangled in Keith’s hair

“That’s why I didn’t want to burden you. To me, that’s the worst. Being a burden. It was really bad at home. I begged Papi to stop drinking. I begged him to let me go and not to hit me… and he never listened. Veronica forced me to have some therapy at the Garrison, but even with therapy, I still… I still wonder if I’m dirty. I didn’t chose to be born, and Mami always told me she loved me… but those years were really scary. I used to have Hunk to distract me, but he’s so pure that he just loves everyone. He’d tell me he loved me for me. But he’s not in my head”

“What do you do when it starts getting bad?”

“Come find you. Or if I couldn’t, I’d hide in the shower until it passed. It’s easier to be late if it looks like you were doing something else”

Lance had been late a lot in the past, plastering a smile on his face and joking about how it took time in the morning to come out looking this good. Keith didn’t want to admit that his chest felt warm over Lance coming to find him when he needed him

“I’m not going to tell you, you know it really stung”

“I know. But I’m weak for when you smile. You’ve been smiling more and more. And getting more and more confident. Then you’re gone with the Blades, and back, and gone again. I worry about how much you’re trying to struggle through it all. So I wanted the time we have for you to be relaxing and recovering”

That warmth from Keith’s chest seemed to be fast filling his cheeks

“Idiot. Even when I’m with the Blades, I’m still thinking about you”

“Mmm, and when you’re gone we all really miss you. I didn’t think… I didn’t think it was okay to like boys. I mean, it was okay for everyone else, but… but I didn’t think I’d find someone who got it too”

“It’s not like I don’t like girls too”

Groaning at him, Lance slung his leg over Keith’s hips, clearly trying to stake his claim

“Babe, I’m scared enough that you’ll find some big muscles Galra to run off with. Don’t scare me with all those cute Galra girls out there. I bet your mum is a total hottie”

“And what if she looks like Zarkon”

“Then we dodged a bullet with the whole no kids thing. We are kids. I realised that. I thought it I was mature for my age and all that, but none of us are…”

“No, we’re not. But we’re getting there. I know we’re stuck in a war, but you guys are the best friends I’ve ever had… I hated being on the outside of you, Hunk, and Pidge, and I was so mad when we started that goo fight, but before I knew it it was fun. Which reminds me, Allura was all good about not training. We decided we all deserved the day off and are going to have a team night tonight. Nothing flash, just movies and snacks… I mean, if you don’t want to go, we can hang out here…”

“I was worried Hunk was going to go overboard and think I needed a special breakfast or something”

Sometimes Lance’s ability to be on the same wavelength as their team mates scared him. Other times, Keith could only mentally shake his head and think about how Lance had rubbed off on all of them

“He did, but this is good too, right?”

“Yeah. I need a shower”

“We need a shower. Plus you’ve got pod breath”

“Rude. I’ll have you know I didn’t have time to think about brushing my teeth”

“And you missed the part where I said we need a shower…”

“Nope. No. I didn’t. I heard that. I dibs washing your hair”

And there Lance went, thinking about his hair again. For someone who’d given him so much shit about it being a mullet, Lance seemed to really love washing or playing with his hair. Maybe he should suggest his boyfriend grow his own out, just to see what all the fuss was about

“Of course you do. I don’t think we’ve finished talking about this”

“No… I don’t think we have either, but I’m going to try tell you more when I’m not okay, and you have to do the same”

“Promise?”

Lance took his promises very seriously. So seriously he propped himself up so he could hold his pinkie up for Keith to hook with his

“I promise. I mean, we are rivals after all”

“Yep. Lance and Keith. Keith and Lance. Necking”

Snorting at him, Lance dropped his head a little

“Pidge has been teaching you bad words again, hasn’t she?”

“Nope. I learned that one from you”

“And you listened to me?”

“Oi! I always listen to you”

“Fine then. Necking in the shower it is. Last one there gets a frozen arse”

Pushing Keith down in his rush to be the first, Keith easily flipped Lance over to pin him and down plant a kiss on his lips before darting off the bed. Two could play Lance’s game and he knew it’d take Lance a few to recover, giving him the advantage. Not that he wouldn’t let Lance have the better spot in the shower when his boyfriend started functioning again.

Bundled up and carrying his blanket, Lance followed Keith to their self assigned lounge room. The castle had a lounge room of its own, but it sucked for team movie nights so a storage room near the kitchen had been converted. For the first time in a long time, Lance felt like he could breathe again… yet that didn’t mean he wasn’t nervous. He knew talking about things with Keith was completely different to talking to Hunk or Pidge, but he did want to thank Pidge for listening to him. If anything the only thing he was truly nervous about was seeing Shiro, but that was how he felt most days. He was still mortified he’d freaked out on Keith and Shiro, even if Keith had been really good about talking to him and listening.

“It’ll be fine. I messaged Hunk and he said they hadn’t started yet”

Right. Of course Keith had. His boyfriend had told him that Hunk and Pidge had seen them kissing, so they didn’t have to hide anymore if he didn’t want to. Keith sticking to his usual bad timing, picking out telling him in the middle of their steamy shower that wasn’t just steamy because both of them preferred to shower with the water temperature just a bit above what normal people would tolerate. Realising Keith was trying to comfort him, Lance had to bite down deflecting and saying the reason he hadn’t hit the door sensor was because he had his hands full

“Sorry. I got lost in my head again. I’m okay”

“Then can you hit the sensor? I’d rather not be caught standing around in my sleep robe and slippers”

Keith still didn’t see the appeal. His boyfriend would rather his jeans and boots any quintant of the movement

“You look fine. We’re supposed to be relaxing”

“I’m plenty relaxed. I’m so relaxed my brain is ready for more sleep”

“That’s what happens when you take care of yourself”

“I’m pretty sure it was you taking care of me that did it”

“Agh. Bah… wha…”

Squeaking, it wasn’t his fault that Keith’s cute and flustered kisses led to some very heavy petting. Keith made the cutest noises, and teenage hormones meant sometimes they just couldn’t help themselves

“Lance, breathe”

“Who are you? And what have you done with my Keith?”

“I am your Keith, idiot… now please open the door”

“Right. Door. I can do that”

Now was not the time for blood to be diverted south from his brain. They might have failed more than once at the sex thing, but cuddles with Keith made up for it. Keith had tried bottoming first, only to tap out from the pain. Lance finding out just how painful it was the following night as they’d tried again… before both deciding sex would happen when it happened. He’d been shitting himself metaphorically, especially when Keith had caged him in. His boyfriend seemed to notice something was wrong instinctually as he’d slowed right down. That and Lance had tried to climb up the bed backwards away from the pain. Things didn’t go in anything like how easily porn made them seem.

Prompting him again, Keith really didn’t need to. He was having a moment thinking how lucky he was, which was helping combat his nerves

“You do know you actually have to push the door pad, right?”

“Yeah, yeah, mullet. Keep your lion pyjama pants on. I’m okay. I just want to say thank you before we go face the others”

“You’re welcome, now can we please go in and hide under the covers already?”

Okay. Now he was setting Keith’s anxieties off. Pressing the sensor pad, the door slid open. Hunk and Pidge in the middle of fighting over what movie to put on, at least that was how it looked seeing they both had hold of Pidge’s laptop.

With Hunk looking to them, Pidge pulled her laptop out of his hands. His best bud bringing his fingers up to worry them together. This was Hunk. He could totally handle Hunk… Keith brushing past him

“Hey, guys. Sorry we’re late, Lance made me change”

When Lance didn’t follow him up, Keith shifted his hold on his blanket to take him by his wrist and tow him towards their friends. Pidge giving them a rare gremlin smile as she looked up from her laptop

“It’s fine. Allura forgot her blanket, and Coran was pouting that his wasn’t good enough so she’s taken him to go get two of hers. I don’t know what you said to Shiro, but he’s only just woken up and is taking a shower before coming up. I see you two took a shower”

Lance froze in his step. Maybe they shouldn’t have… Keith noticing and tugging him hard to his side

“Someone had pod breath. I guess them being late means we get the best seats”

Pidge rolled her eyes at Keith

“I’ve already called dibs. But seeing I’m the best Green Paladin ever, I left you two losers the corner. Don’t even think about abusing the privilege or I will kick you both to the floor”

The corner was the best seat. There was a small jut in the wall that was perfectly sized for stashing snacks. Lance was relieved that Pidge was okay. That she didn’t hate him for his breakdown… He was also grateful he wouldn’t be sitting on the floor. Movie nights were hard when he started flinching when things were passed over his shoulder

“Thanks, Pid-gee-on. Um… and thanks for last night too. And you, Hunk. I’m… I’m sorry I didn’t tell you… Uh, Keith… um…”

Quiznak. He could barely look at Hunk’s feet, let alone his eyes. Keith saving him from his nerves

“He’s trying to say he’s sorry he didn’t tell any of us. I made it clear he’s an idiot, but we get it”

Pidge sighed at the pair of them

“Guys, is this going to be a thing now? Lance already finishes like half your sentences… so you’re going to finish his now? I’m already trying not to think about what my brothers have been getting up to. And you guys don’t need to thank me or anything, but I also totally saved you from Hunk choosing another corny comedy”

Nope. It was no good. Pidge was acting too casual and Hunk seemed broken on the spot

“Does me being with Keith creep you both out?”

Pidge didn’t skip a beat

“Nah, you two are super close as it was. Hunk’s not creeped out either. He wants to hug you but is scared he’s going to upset you”

This was why it’d been better with Hunk not knowing. Maybe he’d figured out how dirty Lance felt?

“Everyone knows Hunk gives the best hugs on the castle”

Throwing Hunk a life line, Hunk took it. His teddy bear of a friend coming to wrap his arms around him and lift him off his feet

“I’m sorry, man. I knew it was bad… I mean, uh, I knew about the nightmares. Why didn’t you tell us?”

“Dude, you’re crushing me here. I didn’t tell you because I don’t want to think about it anymore. I know it hurt that I didn’t, but I don’t want things to be different”

“But what you must have gone through… I mean…”

Hunk was physically crushing him now, despite the padding of the blanket

“We’ve all got our own stuff going on”

“Yeah, but you’re my best friend. You can tell me these things”

“It’s complicated and a mess in my head hole… and dude, can you put me down now before I end up in the pod again from being squashed?”

Sheepishly, Hunk placed him back down. Keith pulling him against him from behind

“I’m sorry, man”

“It’s okay. Really, I don’t want a fuss made. Some days are hard, but we all have hard days, and despite how emo he is, Keith is really good at this stuff. He kind of knew some of it or at least guessed, I think. Besides, there’s food and I’m kind of starving”

“Eat up, bro. I baked way too much… Um, and about you and Keith, I’m happy for both of you… I just thought… well, I thought you liked Allura… and Nyma… and Jennifer”

Lance did. He thought he was in love with Allura, not just… It wasn’t lust, but kind of a fairytale love at first sight on his behalf. Allura was still beautiful and way out his league, but loving her had been tiring. Besides, she had Lotor, and he much preferred what he and Keith had worked hard to build together. Keith could be tiring, but they just seemed to fit together so well now that they’d sorted their differences out

“Keith and I are both bi. So we both appreciate that she’s beautiful, but despite Keith’s mullet, he make me happy. And for some reason he’s chosen me. I’m not replacing you as my best Hunkeroonie any time soon”

“Aw, bud. Okay, grab some food and get settled. Pidge, we’re not watching another horror movie”

Settling down against Keith, Lance had his head resting against Keith’s shoulder. Pidge on his other side as Hunk fussed over the snacks. He knew he thanked her, but she had to have questions about his past. Seeing the others were still not there, Lance nudged Pidge lightly

“Pidge, I’m still really sorry. But thank you for listening to me and not joking about it all. I… is there anything you want to ask me?”

Looking up from her laptop, Pidge nodded. His gremlin had bags under her eyes, so Lance wouldn’t be surprised if she fell asleep during movie night and would need to be carried back to her room

“You’re my brother. I’m not going to ask you about it if you don’t want to talk about it”

“I still feel like I should explain more, to all three of you… my Papi was a drunk. He wasn’t always… and he didn’t take it out on everyone… He… he would beat me, or hit me if I tried to get between him and Mami. I know you guys will say that I’m me and all that, but it’s hard still. It’s… it’s easier now than it was… but I still feel really guilty. I…”

Pidge cut him off

“Lance, you’re an idiot. You’re not your father. Just because he spoofed in your mumma, doesn’t mean anything. You never made him hurt you. Not that I want to think about our parents having sex, but like, I’m glad you’re here. Though I did have some rather awesome plans of what we could have done if your father was still alive… You just keep being you. But like, don’t go kissing Keith around us. Kissing is gross. That goes for you too, Keith. And no sex. And no sex in Black or Red. Wait, I do have a question, who confessed to who first?”

Lance didn’t need the mental images of his father and his mother. Pidge was just about the coolest gremlin ever

“Um, Keith. He suddenly kissed me. Then ghosted me for like a movement before kissing me again. We’ve been together like 3 months, or whatever the math for three months is. It happened when he had that allergic reaction”

Pidge perked right up, leaning past Lance to whack Keith on the chest. Keith oofing as Lance sucked in his lips trying not to be the next victim

“Thank you for reminding me. I’ve been meaning to hit you for that. You scared all of us. Lance was crying his eyes out over you. I guess we know why now”

Pidge was off… Lance finding he wasn’t forcing himself to explain

“No. We weren’t dating then. I… I was there when my father died and I was scared Keith was going to die before my eyes… like he did. He was so out of it, and he looked like he’d been making out with a puffer fish”

Pidge smacked him on the arm lighter than she’d hit Keith

“You’re not responsible. From the sound of it, it was an accident because he was drunk. But even if it was, your father is as bad as Zarkon. You always take on too much. Stop trying to take on his shit too. That thing about babies inheriting their parents sins is crap too”

Lance didn’t expect Pidge to know about that. He felt he had. That he’d always be dirty to the depths of his soul for who his father was and what he’d done

“How do you know about that?”

“I’ve seen enough movies. No more putting yourself down. And no more bottling it up. I’m not going to let anyone talk shit about my brother, even himself”

Reaching out, Lance pulled Pidge close

“You are the coolest little gremlin. I mean, I had my doubts, but thanks, Pidge”

“Yes, yes. Now get off me. I think we’ve had enough gushy feelings for the day. Cling to your boyfriend. God. It’s officially weird. Hunk, Lance and Keith figured out their relationship before you and Shay. Maybe it’s time you asked her out?”

“Maybe it’s time who asked who out?”

Finally joining them, Allura poked her head around the pile of blankets she was carrying, the Princess skipping waiting for his answer

“It’s nice to see you’re feeling better, Lance. I feel like I haven’t seen you in movements. How’s your wrist?”

“I’m fine, thanks. We were just saying that Hunk and Shay make a cute couple”

Allura nodded quickly

“They would indeed. We’re not too late are we?”

“Nah, you didn’t miss anything. Pidge chose tonight’s movie”

“Oh, no. Not another one those Earth movies you call horror”

To Lance catching Shiro standing behind Allura was much scarier than any of Pidge’s choice in horror movies. Personally Lance preferred a good love story as there was generally less domestic violence shown in them… that and his lovesick heart loved a happy ending. Unimpressed, Pidge pushed her glasses up her nose before looking to Allura

“You guys forfeited your vote by being late. What took you three so long?”

Allura giggled, carrying her armful of blankets over and dropping them on Pidge, who pushed her way out the smile with glare that Allura ignored. Coran seemed to be wrestling with not stepping on the hem of his as he wore it like a cape. His space family was weird, but Lance loved all of them

“I’m sorry. Shiro didn’t bring a blanket, so we had to go back again to find one for him. Isn’t that right, Shiro?”

Wincing as Shiro opened his mouth, Keith squeezed Lance’s hand again. Lance fully expecting Shiro to chew him out in front of everyone

“Uh. Yeah. Guys, I’m sorry. I had a talk with Keith and some time to reflect. I know I’m hard on you all, but I want to see you all succeed to the best of your abilities. I’m going to try do better”

Lance mentally sighed to himself. It felt like the whole “but” bit was directed right at him. Hearing Shiro’s apology just didn’t ring true. Then again, his trauma had fractured the way he processed things, causing him to overthink his overthinking. He could laugh and smile, say it was okay, but inside he was hurting and sure that whatever hurtful thing directed his way was a direct result of how dirty he was. It’d been over a decade since he’d realised something was wrong with him, and not until he’d learned what sex was that he started wondering almost non-stop if he was the product of an attack. A few kinds words pleased his dumb heart too much.

“You could start by cutting us some slack during training. Sometimes you’re really hard on us”

Lance went stiff over Pidge’s bold bluntness. Shiro chuckling halfheartedly, and way too awkwardly. Yeah, Lance could tell he didn’t appreciate Pidge’s input

“I’ve been told. I’m thinking we should introduce a buddy system and curb the late night trainings… just until everyone is at the same level”

Until Lance caught up. Pidge ready to challenge Shiro again

“You can’t just take training away from Keith, he’ll wither and die if he doesn’t get his daily dose of stabbing things. Why don’t we just agree that if something does happen, we’ll go to Keith provided we’re not impaled or such, then discuss what happened as a team. It’s not like we like each other being hurt. Accidents happen. I’m going to check the training code tomorrow to make sure the limiter is still in place. Maybe some sensors to detect possible breaks so that we don’t end up falling through the floor with like a broken leg or something”

Shiro opened and closed his mouth, before nodding

“That does sound a better idea. How are you doing, Lance? Keith said you wrist was broken”

“It’s fine now, the pod healed up… plus we’re having a team bonding night, so I’m thinking we totally talk about this tomorrow and enjoy ourselves tonight”

Shiro snorted at him. Lance failing to play the right role as the happy idiot

“Trust you to be the first to relax… Then again, I think Keith may have been right about us all needing a break. I’m sorry if I upset you”

An actual apology on the back of a jab. Lance supposed that was as good as he was going to get. He didn’t accept it. He couldn’t just accept it. Not with how hard Shiro had been to him. An apology was not a magic cure. He knew he and Keith would have to work on building back the dent to their trust, as with everyone else

“Okay, well, thanks. Are you going to stand there all night, or come join the rest of us?”

“I’m coming. This is supposed to be a team bonding night”

Two movies down, and everyone around them had fallen asleep. Lance nearly asleep as cuddled into Keith’s side, which was the same as what Pidge was doing on his other side

“Wanna go to bed?”

“Nah. If I move too fast we’ll wake Pidge up”

“She is pretty scary when she first wakes up”

“She is. This was nice”

Coran was one of those people who questioned everything happening as the movie played. Now he was asleep next to Allura, who had her head on Shiro’s leg

“Yeah. It was. I’m sorry about Shiro”

Lance didn’t want to talk about Shiro… but he was Keith’s brother. They couldn’t keep butting heads without Keith being hurt

“I’m sorry I’m not ready to accept his apology properly. But that’s on me. I don’t want you worrying”

“I’m going to worry”

“I know. Is it bad I can’t simply forgive him?”

“Nah. There’s times when I needed time before I could forgive him too. There’s no one on this team harder on themselves than you”

Except for Keith who now over thought every mission plan to the point he looked like he was constipated. Pidge who who felt if her code wasn’t dead on point she’d failed the gods of the techno world, not to mention her father and Matt. Shiro who took this war so seriously he hadn’t stopped to heal his trauma, and occasionally got way too overprotective because of it. Coran who worked his hands to the point of physical pain keeping the castle in tip top shape. Allura who felt guilty that they’d all been dragged into this after she’d lost her whole home world. Hunk who stressed baked himself into a nervous breakdown if someone didn’t stop him. They were all barely hanging in there, with only the comforts of each other.

“I think you’d give me a fair run for my GAC. I’ve seen how hard you’ve been working to keep up with us and the Blade”

Keith sighed softly, before kissing Lance on the top of his head as he mumbled against Lance’s hair

“Maybe. But this is about you. You don’t have to forgive him if you’re not ready”

“You said that already, babe. For the first time in a long time I feel like I can breathe a little bit easier. Thanks for all of this”

“This wasn’t just me. We’re a family. We’ll get through this together, right? I mean, that’s what you always say”

“Yeah… when we all stick together there’s basically nothing we can’t do”

“Right”

There was no easy fix for trauma. Even the therapist didn’t get it. Maybe it was because he was supported by the ones he loved who hadn’t shunned him that Lance really did feel better about having told them. He knew there’d still be days when it’d fuck him right up, but… but he had the love of most of them around them. And that wasn’t a bad feeling at all.

#it was the little things

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calligraphist-artemisia · 4 years ago

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Field of Flowers

Written for the Kidge Spring Event!

Prompt 7: Daffodil | Unequaled Love, New Beginnings

Summary: It was just another normal day for Youtuber Katie "Pidge" Holt. She and her boyfriend were going to spend a few hours recording some stuff in Minecraft for their channels and then probably wrangle their friends into a few rounds of Among Us. Except Keith has a question designed to derail all of those plans.

Also posted on AO3 under the username Kishirokitsune

❀ - ❀ - ❀ - ❀ - ❀

Pidge settled in at her desk and took a look around to make sure there was nothing odd in the background of her webcam. There was only her cat, Tesla, who was relaxing in his carpeted tree, which was sure to thrill her viewers. On the desk in front of her were two monitors, one which displayed all of her recording details, as well as the service she and her boyfriend were using to communicate while they played. The bigger monitor was showing the main screen of Minecraft.

She put on her headphones and adjusted her mic. “Keith, can you hear me?”

“Yeah, I hear you. Everything all set up?” he asked.

Pidge glanced up at her webcam as she nodded. “Yup! I'm just going to put you on mute to run through my intro and then we can get started. You can hop in if you want and I'll join once I'm ready.”

“Sounds good. I'll see you in a few.”

She quickly muted the audio for his channel and gave it a few seconds to make sure she couldn't hear him as he loaded up their game. Then she sat up straight and began recording. “Hey, everyone! I'm TechOwl and today we'll be jumping back into Minecraft with the always handsome KHawkins. As always, there will be a link to his channel in the description and I encourage you to check out his stuff as well.”

Pidge hit join and easily found their usual world, typing in the password so she could join. She waited to unmute until the world had loaded in and caught Keith in mid-sentence when she did.

“...tower and arming it with bows and arrows, so I'll need to expand the chicken farm. Pidge will probably – hi, Pidge – probably help with harvesting flint,” Keith said.

“I'll see what I can gather up while I'm mining,” Pidge said as she opened her inventory to try and remember where she left off. She had a whole row of iron pickaxes and plenty of wood and coal, so she had probably come up to drop off everything in the vault beneath their house and to grab some food. “Actually, let me see what's in the Vault first.”

“You're back at the house?”

“Yeah, I think I was getting food. My bar's pretty low,” Pidge responded. She directed her character through the trapdoor in the corner and rode the ladder down 25 blocks to a room she'd carved out during their first few videos together. Double chests lined the walls and also had signs to go along with them. She went to the section for stones and took a peek into the box labeled 'gravel'. “We only have a stack of it. I'll go find more once I get some food. There's probably a vein of it somewhere in my tunnels that I haven't bothered collecting yet.”

“It'll be a while before I need it, so there's no real rush,” Keith told her. “I still have to build the watchtower and I won't get to that until I'm finished with the gardens.”

Pidge frowned as she went back up the ladder to get into the food chest in their house. “I thought we had way more gravel than that. Have you used any?”

“I used a few stacks of that and the sand to make some concrete a while back,” Keith said.

Pidge guessed that meant they were nearly out of sand as well. It was a bit of a venture to get to the desert biome where she'd harvested most of it, but that could wait for a while. “Anything else I can mine for you, oh-masterful-builder-of-the-world-above?”

“No, I think that's about it,” Keith responded, his tone light. “I thank you for your service, oh-lady-of-the-deep-earth.”

Pidge snorted with amusement as she grabbed a stack of food and ate until her hunger bar was full. She kept a few cooked pork chops in her inventory and put the rest back before turning to go back down into the complex labyrinth of her mine. She got halfway down the ladder before she swore and turned to go back up and fetch more wood, filling up the empty slots in her inventory so she could drop off the extras into the Vault. She kept one full stack of 64 wood blocks on her and then ventured through the double doors leading into the mine.

Pidge spent the next hour combing over her tunnels and collecting any gravel she came across using the iron shovels she specifically built for that purpose. She also collected a decent number of chunks of flint and took all of it back up to the surface with her once she was through.

All the while, she and Keith carried on a conversation for the sake of entertaining their audiences – their banter was often something that was most talked about between their fanbases, with numerous jokes gaining meme-like status. Their friends were fond of quoting those memes back at them whenever they played games together.

“Hey, where do you want all of this gravel and flint?” Pidge asked once she was back in the house. Once again, she had to pause to grab a snack from their food chest as she started taking hunger damage.

“Gravel can stay down there. I have a double chest at the bottom of the watchtower. The flint... yeah, go ahead and bring the flint up to me. I'm at the top. You should look over the edge and check out the garden from up here too. I'll stand on the side you should look over,” Keith said, sounding as though he was leaning away from his microphone. “Hang on, I've gotta run and get something. Go ahead and come up.”

“On my way,” Pidge responded.

She left the house and then looked up, spotting the watchtower immediately. It was a massive wooden structure that stretched high into the sky, though it didn't look like it was all the way up to the build height. She stopped at the base to drop off the stacks of gravel and then hopped on the ladder and rode it all the way to the top. It was there that she found Keith's character standing motionless to one side.

“I'll just drop these off here first,” Pidge said, cracking open the single chest that was next to the ladder. She dropped off the 24 flints and then backed out of the inventory so she could enjoy the sky-high view of the gardens that Keith had spent several sessions working on.

She hopped up on the side where he was standing and looked down. She could see the food garden off to one side, stretching down along the plot of land they took the time to flatten out. To the left of them was a field of flowers and as she looked at them, she realized they spelled something out.

“Wait...” she breathed as her mind caught up with what she was seeing.

Spelled out with red flowers was the question: “Will you marry me?”

Pidge tugged off her headphones and turned in her chair, ready to run downstairs and confront her boyfriend, but he was already there in her office, waiting for her with that soft smile on his face. “Keith?”

He walked into the room and knelt down in front of her, taking her hand with his own. “I've been in love with you from the first day we met. I didn't know it at the time. It took a few people pointing it out to me. Or, well, a lot of people,” he chuckled, “but eventually I figured it out. I never thought I would have the opportunity to find such happiness in my life and it's thanks to you that I have. I can't imagine spending the rest of my life without you in it.”

Pidge hiccuped as she tried to breathe in, reaching up to cover her mouth even as tears of happiness began to spill from her eyes. “Keith...”

Keith cracked open a tiny black box and held it out for Pidge to see the slender silver ring inside. It was inset with three green jewels – not the traditional diamond, but she'd never been fond of those anyway. “Katie Holt, will you marry me?”

She nodded, swallowing thickly so she could try and get the words out. “Yes! Yes, I will.” She slid out of her chair with a breathless laugh and into his arms, unable to wait until he could slip the ring onto her finger. She pressed a kiss to his cheek and then another and another until Keith was shaking from laughter and had to ask if she even wanted the ring.

Pidge pulled away from him, a great big smile on her face as she held out her hand in response, allowing him to put the ring on her finger. And then she dove right back in, kissing him with all that she had to make up for her lack of words.

❀ - ❀ - ❀ - ❀ - ❀

Bonus Scene

“Coran! Coran, you have to come see this!” Allura shouted in excitement.

She could hear him running down the hall from his office, where he was working on editing their newest video together, and was soon striding over to her side while asking if everything was alright. Allura responded with a smile and by hitting play on what she had been watching.

“...-ver the edge and check out the garden from up here too. I'll stand on the side you should look over,” Keith's voice came through the speakers.

Allura eagerly watched Coran and knew the exact moment when Keith's proposal was revealed by the way Coran suddenly squealed in delight. She glanced back at the screen in time to watch it fade away from the flowers and then fade back in with a photo of Pidge and Keith, who were smiling at the camera. Pidge held up her left hand so a beautiful ring could be seen. It was also accompanied by the words: “She said yes!”

“How exciting!” Coran said, grinning broadly. “We must do something to celebrate! Dinner, perhaps? I'll call Hunk and begin preparations!”

Before Allura could agree or disagree with his idea, Coran was gone. She laughed softly and took out her phone to send out a warning to the rest of the group so they wouldn't be too blindsided.

It was certainly an event worth celebrating.

#voltron #kidge #kidgemas #kidge spring event 2021 #fanfiction #youtuber au

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izlaria · 4 years ago

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Someone you like (part 5)

This is the fifth chapter of my “Someone you like” inspired fic. It’s also available on AO3 in case you prefer that platform.

This and the fourth chapter are also inspired by the “Distance” and “Talk to me” animatics by @suerakocy, so please check that out and give the artist some praise. They deserve it so much, because those pieces are beautiful.

Summary: It takes Lance years to come back to the Garrison but, when he does, his friends are there for him.

We finally get Lance pining hour!

Trigger warning: Talk of PTSD and mention of blood, but no description of violence. The story really just starts right in it.

24 and 22 years old

Lance woke up to a dark, quiet room and for a moment he couldn’t move. He could barely breathe. The air felt stuck in his throat, because as soon as he inhaled the sound of his haggard breathing would break the silence and alert whatever awaited in the shadows.

But there’s nothing there, Lance told himself.

He had dreamt of the war, again. In his nightmare, there was another explosion and Lance hadn’t been quick enough to shield whoever was with him in the room. The darkness that followed was oppressing, dense enough that he’d felt like it was water flooding his lungs.

And then the water had turned into blood.

He sat up in bed, trying to control his shaking. It had taken years and a lot of therapy, but Lance had managed not to fall into panic attacks every time such memories made their way into his dreams. Still, he was glad to have built his own house on the farm grounds. His parents deserved a good night’s rest, especially after what Lance had put them through during his time with Voltron.

He reached for his cellphone with unsteady fingers. After their last battle against the Galra, Lance had learned to leave it on during his sleep, just in case he woke up like this: with adrenaline running through his veins and the vague sensation that something was terribly wrong.

He hesitated over his contact list, before finally scrolling down and pressing call. It didn’t take long for the other person to answer.

“Is anyone hurt?” was Keith’s greeting.

“No.” Lance swallowed once, trying to erase the grit from his voice. “Nightmare.”

There was a second of silence and then the rustle of sheets. “Okay.” He heard Keith exhale harshly, but Lance knew it wasn’t in annoyance. The whole team had gone through this more times than they could count. “Okay.” Keith seemed a little calmer now. “Are you all right?”

“Not really,” Lance confessed. He leaned against the headboard and pulled his knees up. It was easier to concentrate on his breathing when he wasn’t lying down. “It was Sendak’s first attack, again.”

“You’ve been thinking about that one a lot lately.” Keith’s observation made Lance grind his teeth. It was true, but he didn’t need to say it.

“Could you call her?” Lance breathed out. His voice sounded pained and he winced, thankful that only Keith was privy to it.

“Lance, we can’t keep doing this.” His friend’s tone was weighted with his own share of hurt. “If you want to know how she is, then you need to call Pidge.”

“I do call Pidge. Just not…”

“Not when you are feeling vulnerable?” Keith sighed into the phone, sounding more tired than normal.

“You weren’t sleeping, were you?” Lance latched onto this realization. He felt stupid not to have recognized it earlier, with how quickly Keith had answered the call.

“Don’t change the subject.” The reply came harshly and it only served to confirm his suspicions.

“I’m not! We made a deal to call one another if the flashbacks started again.” He lit up the lamp on his nightstand and frowned at the pictures he kept on the opposing wall, as if it could make the real Keith feel his irritation. “Would you have talked to anyone if I hadn’t called?”

“My mom is here with me,” Keith admitted after a moment. “She and Kolivan have kept me company while Xitry is away.”

Lance let relief replace his anger. “Are both Xitry and Acxa on a mission?”

“Yeah… My leg still isn’t completely healed, so I couldn’t join them. Acxa will take another phoeb to come home, but Xitry should be back in a few days.” Keith paused and there was the sound of other muffled voices. “Mom says you should call Pidge.”

“You are a traitor and a hypocrite.” Lance scowled, despite how no one could see him.

Keith scoffed and Lance could feel the mockery in his expression even so many miles away. “I have called my partners every day they’ve been gone. Can you say the same?”

“Pidge is not my partner!” he protested, feeling heat rise up his neck.

“No, she’s just the first person you think about when waking up from a nightmare and then you call me, because if you called Hunk he would just spill it to her first chance he got.” Lance did not appreciate all the sarcasm Keith was giving him.

“I just want to be sure that she’s okay!” He frowned down at his knees, picking at a piece of lint that stuck to his pajama pants.

“Then ask her yourself!” Keith, too, was being too loud for the middle of the night. His vexation almost felt like a victory to Lance. “Pidge is smart, she can tell there’s something strange about my calls.”

“How are you a spy with this kind of acting skills?” Lance chastened.

“I’m no longer a spy, remember? I’m part of a humanitarian organization!” He heard Keith take a deep breath. “This would be much easier if you just told Pidge you’re in love with her.”

The words gave him pause. Lance didn’t yet know how to describe what he felt for Pidge. She was one of his best friends, the person who had stuck around the most after the team went their separate ways. Shiro had his own family to rebuild, and Keith and Hunk had a whole universe to help stabilize.

Pidge and Lance had found their own goals, but staying on Earth allowed them to check in on each other much more often.

“She doesn’t see me like that, Keith.” Lance hadn’t meant to sound so defeated, but it came out that way.

“Yeah, well, neither did Allura, but you wore her out.”

The reminder didn’t bring the same pain it would have a few years earlier.

Lance knew that he would always love Allura, but his feelings had settled into a more comfortable kind of affection. With the privilege of hindsight, Lance was able to see that their relationship didn’t have the same base as his friendship with the other paladins. Even if she had lived, Allura would have left to be queen, too invested in the rebuilding of Altean society.

And Lance would have stayed on Earth. That had never been in question. He had put his family through enough suffering while with Voltron.

He had seen the greatness in Allura when he was only eighteen, but that also meant he would have stepped aside if he thought their relationship was putting a strain in both of them. He didn’t regret the time they’d had together, but her continuous rejections had also taught Lance to value himself.

Keith’s voice snapped Lance out of his thoughts. “I didn’t mean to bring up Allura.”

“No, it’s fine.” Lance rubbed his eyes. “I just… I don’t want Pidge to think of Allura if I ever do ask her out.”

“I can’t promise you that.” He respected Keith’s honesty, even though it did nothing to calm his worries. “But she will never see you as a romantic prospect if you don’t make things clear to her. As far as Pidge knows, you’re still in mourning.”

Again, Keith was right. Lance had been ruminating this notion for quite some time. There were times when he still felt indebted to Allura, like he was the one responsible for maintaining her legacy, but the years had given him enough maturity to understand that was a burden Allura would wish on no one.

It was difficult to take the first steps towards a new future when he’d spent so long wallowing in the darkness of the war. In the middle of it all, Pidge had been a beacon of light, a safe port for him to rest his mind. It was no wonder that he had fallen for her.

“I’m thinking of going back to the Garrison.” He swallowed thickly, the fear of this confession rising up to knot at his throat.

The line went silent for a moment. “Are you serious?”

“Yeah.” Lance chuckled. “I’ve been working with Shiro and Doctor Holt, because the quintessence Allura left in me allows me to interact with Altean technology a little better than most. And since I’ve put my pilot license to good use in my travels, Shiro said the officers are ready to reinstate me.”

“That’s amazing, Lance!” It was weird to hear Keith sound so enthusiastic.

“I think that’s why the memories are coming back again, actually.” His next exhale came out shaky and forced. “I keep thinking of the Garrison and I just – I’m afraid that I’ll get there and it will be too much.”

“The place has changed a lot since the war,” Keith assured him. “Even if something happened, though, Shiro and Pidge are there to help you through. This could be really good for you.”

Lance snickered at his directness. Keith didn’t hide his opinions, didn’t coddle him like so much of his family. “So you think it’s a good idea?”

“I think it’s the best idea you’ve ever had.” His friend’s voice was blunt, without the dramatics that Lance himself would have added to such a statement. “Which is not saying much,” Keith teased.

“Hardy har har.” But Lance felt a smile pull at his mouth. “Does that mean you will call Pidge for me?”

There was a groan from the other side of the line. “Lance, no. I’m putting my foot down.”

“What? Why?” he complained and, with his movement, one of the pillows slipped to the ground. Lance glared at it.

“Because I’m sick of watching two of my closest friends dance circles around each other.” Keith sounded increasingly exasperated. “Talk. To. Her. Pidge is a tough girl, but she has grown a lot. She won’t be mad at you for calling.”

“I know that!” Lance grumbled.

“Then do it!” Before he could disagree, Keith had already hung up the phone.

Lance stared at the screen in discontentment. The display told him it was just before 4 am in Varadero, meaning that it wasn’t even 2 am in Arizona. His talk with Keith had distracted him from the nightmare, but now that Lance was alone with his thoughts images of it had begun to flash in his mind.

Against the dimly lit wall of his bedroom, he could almost see the silhouette of Pidge’s younger self, her body contorted by the force of a blast Lance hadn’t been quick enough to protect her from.

His need to know Pidge was safe overrode his anxiety over disturbing her sleep.

The phone rang more times than it had with Keith, which was a bit nerve-wrecking, but also a relief. Lance hoped she was having a better rest than he was.

“Lance?” The breathiness of her voice made him swallow. “Hi.”

“Hi,” he replied, at a loss of what else to say.

“Nightmares?” From her low volume, Lance could tell that Pidge must have been at her parents’ house. He felt bad for disturbing them.

“You’re okay, right?” His words were jumbled together. “I didn’t mean to wake you up, but– You are safe, aren’t you?”

“I’m safe, Lance.” He closed his eyes, feeling the last of his distress leave him with the sound of her voice. “I’m glad you called, actually.”

He tilted his head back until it hit the headboard. “Were you dreaming of me, Pidgey-Pidge?”

“No,” she cut him off brusquely, “but I imagine you were dreaming of me.”

“Why would you think so?” He grimaced at how strangled his voice sounded.

“Because I know you have had Keith calling me for the past couple months.” Her no-nonsense attitude made Lance feel like a deer-in-headlights.

“I can’t believe he ratted me out!” Once again, Lance directed his glare at a photo of Keith on the wall. “I have some choice words for that half-alien tattletale!”

“Keep your words, he didn’t say anything.” Pidge heaved a sigh. “I just know you two. As soon as he mentioned the explosion Sendak caused, I knew he was acting on your behalf.”

Lance winced, but didn’t protest. He should have realized that Pidge couldn’t be tricked. Not only was she a certified genius, but her loyalty to her friends often translated into being more observant than one might like. She and Hunk had that in common: the uncanny ability to get involved in other people’s business.

“Keith dreams of Shiro or his father. When I do appear in his nightmares, it’s usually about not being able to grab me when we were in Honerva’s mindscape,” she went on. “That dude still harbors a displaced sense of responsibility towards us.” Her tone shifted into accusing. “Which we should not be exploiting.”

“Sorry, I wasn’t trying to do that.” Lance slipped on the sheets until he was lying down again.

“What’s going on, Lance?” Pidge sounded concerned. “Why didn’t you just call me?”

There were many reasons, but none that he felt comfortable sharing. It had been a year since Lance had realized how much of an effect Pidge had on him, how happy he was to hear her voice, how warm his chest felt when she visited the farm. It wasn’t even a new development. He had loved her for as long as he could remember, so he couldn’t really define when it had gone from platonic to romantic.

Maybe the roots of it had always been there, hidden by the flashiness of other infatuations.

A part of him had resisted the urge to call Pidge because, despite how she probably knew him like the charted universe, he had hoped she would see strength in his recovery. Lance still wanted to be perceived as the hero who survived the war with a smile on his face and his psyche intact, no matter how far from the truth that might be.

“Shouldn’t it be easier?” he asked, so low that he hoped Pidge couldn’t hear him. “Shouldn’t I be over it?”

“Lance…” Even the way she sighed his name sent a shiver down his spine. “No. It shouldn’t be easy. We’ve talked about this.”

He had heard this from a number of therapists, as well as every other member of the team, but it was difficult to go against the ideals he’d created in his head.

“But you’re doing good,” Lance argued and his gaze fixed on the ceiling, without really seeing it.

“So are you, most of the time.” When Pidge said it like that, full of confidence, he could almost believe it. “When I feel like the memories are hurting me, I reach out. I come to see my parents, I stop by Shiro’s office.” She paused to take a breath. “I call you.”

Lance turned on his side, sticking the phone between his ear and the pillow. He badly wanted her to be there. They had slept side by side once, though he couldn’t remember the details of it. Even then, what had stuck out the most was the softness of her presence and the calm she provided.

He closed his eyes and focused on Pidge’s voice. “I really miss you.”

“I’m right here, Lance.” Like this, he could pretend she was in bed with him. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“I can’t believe you put a firewall to keep me out of your virtual diary, Pidge. It’s rude that you would think so low of me.”

Lance stopped short. It wasn’t the content of the conversation that surprised him, but the fact that it was Hunk’s voice, coming from the laboratories. His best friend had been on a diplomatic mission of two months and was supposed to contact Lance when he stopped on Arus to refuel his ship.

“I was clearly right, because you wouldn’t know of it unless you had tried to hack in.” And this was Pidge, sounding more incensed than he’d heard in quite some time. “I learned my lesson during our Garrison days, Hunk!”

“Shouldn’t you be buttering me up? You called me for help on this aircraft, young lady.” Lance almost snorted at this. He could already imagine the indignation on Pidge’s face.

“If I had known you’d be like this, I would have found a way to neutralize drag simply to negate your role here!” she spit back. From behind the glass walls, Lance observed the redness of her complexion and how her freckles disappeared into the color.

He expected Hunk to back down, but the man crossed his arms stubbornly and looked down his nose at Pidge. “You’re only saying that because I’m right.”

Lance knocked against a metallic frame on the door, which had been open.

“Team Punk is back at it?” He raised his hands in mock despair. “I knew I should have stayed home.”

“Lance!” Hunk rushed over to him, engulfing Lance in a hug. Over his shoulder, he saw Pidge hang back, but the anger had melted away from her expression. “Sorry I didn’t call you earlier, man. This little menace caught me on the way back from Firilar and she wanted me at the Garrison ASAP.”

“Yeah, I regret it now,” she retorted with a glare.

Hunk let Lance go in order to direct another exasperated look at Pidge.

“Hey there, Pidgeon.” Lance scratched the back of his neck, unsure of what to do. She didn’t move from her spot on the workbench and he approached almost without thinking. “Long time no see.”

As soon as he was within reach, Pidge pulsed on the balls of her feet and threw her arms around his neck. Lance’s arms were around her with no hesitance, holding her up against his chest.

“Hello,” she muttered into his shoulder. “Aren’t you supposed to be in the Cabul complex with Shiro and Curtis?”

Even as she talked, Pidge didn’t give up her grip on him. It made laughter bubble up Lance’s throat. He’d been all around the world, assisting the Garrison centers in completing Earth’s first fully functioning planetary defense system, so it had been months since he’d last seen Pidge in person.

“I flew over once the installation was done. They needed me to activate the shields with quintessence, but then Arizona called.” She slowly slid down back to her feet, putting some space between them. “Something about needing their star pilot to test a new jet.”

He watched as first confusion, then realization dawned on Pidge’s face. To the side, he could see that Hunk was also grinning.

“Are you back? Don’t you lie to me, McClain!” She pushed at his shoulders, but there was excitement in her eyes.

“I’m back. I got the go-ahead earlier today.” He felt awkward under the combined stares of his two best friends. “I do remember telling you I wasn’t ready to retire. Guess my vacation ran a bit long.”

“Oh, man, we’re back together! The last time it was just the three of us in the Garrison we were still cadets.” Hunk jumped in, waving his arms widely. “I still couldn’t go on a simulator without getting motion-sickness! Lance still thought Pidge was a guy!”

“Yeah, I’m not making that mistake again.” Lance gave Pidge a cheeky once-over, making her flush.

She had let her hair grow out again. It was tied back in a long braid, but some strands had already escaped and framed her face in a reddish halo. She looked pretty like this, but Lance thought she was always pretty.

It had taken her some time to find middle ground between the androgyny of her adolescence and the femininity of Katie Holt. Lance hadn’t always been the most tactful during this period, but Pidge had known he meant well and that he was supportive of however she felt like expressing herself. It was nice to see her feel good in her own skin.

Pidge socked him on the arm. “We’ve talked about this, loverboy. No flirting with me unless you want a new bruise.”

“But, Pidgeon,” he put a hand over his heart, “this is how I show my love.”

“Okay, that’s enough!” Hunk put a hand on their shoulders. “We don’t want to start a fight right next to the billion-dollar prototype.”

“Fine,” Lance drew out his vowels, making a show of it. “Honestly, though, you two look good.”

He wasn’t just saying this. Coming back to the Garrison allowed him to juxtapose the images of who Pidge and Hunk had been with their current selves.

Hunk hadn’t grown much taller and he had maintained the same robustness from their first meeting, but the anxiety that had followed him as a teenager now gave way to self-assuredness. He didn’t curl into himself anymore when going past other groups of students, nor did he cower in the face of Garrison officers.

They were all still young and maybe a little broken up after Voltron, but it had also taught them a lot about themselves and their worth. It was nice to see.

And then there was Pidge. With her long hair, her high-tech glasses, her unconventional wardrobe. She was nothing like what younger Lance had thought he wanted in a girl, but that didn’t stop her from occupying all of his thoughts.

“You do too!” Hunk exclaimed, clearly a little embarrassed. “I haven’t seen you this excited in years.”

“Yeah.” Lance chuckled, unable to stop himself. “It feels good to be back. We’ll see how things go with the other MFE pilots, but I’m not too worried.” He wiggled his brows at Hunk. “I’m pretty sure I can charm the pants out of them.”

“And if that fails, you can always count on Shiro and I to intimidate people,” Pidge cut in, a teasing smile on her face, but there was a deeper current of truth to her words. They had his back and Lance was grateful for it.

“I’m pretty intimidating myself.” Lance smirked. “We just need Keith and then the gang will be completed: the Garrison bad boys, who stole a prisoner and disappeared into the night!” He made a motion in the air, like a ship cutting through the sky.

“I take it back, I don’t want to be associated with you.” Pidge’s dry comment earned a laugh from Hunk and a pout from Lance.

“Oh, come on, Pidge!” He draped an arm around the girl to pull her closer, but Pidge didn’t react as he’d hoped. She leveled him with unimpressed eyes, making no move to acknowledge their proximity. Lance found himself as the one feeling flustered and hurried to mask his discomfort. “You could at least say you’re happy to have me around.”

“Of course I’m happy, Lance,” she conceded with little fanfare. “That doesn’t mean I feel like contributing to enlarging your already massive ego.”

Pidge was looking at him over the top of her glasses. Uncovered from the greenish tint of the lenses, the honey brown of her eyes appeared strangely expressive. There was an emotion in them that he had seen a lot through the years, when they were on video calls at night, by themselves, but that he hadn’t had the opportunity to see in person yet.

Lance felt his own expression soften as he stared down at Pidge.

Before he could figure out what to say, Hunk, who had been preoccupied with a series of beeps from his communicator, had turned towards them and snapped his fingers. “We have so much to show you, now that you have the clearance!” His smile was even more contagious in person than through a screen. “I don’t know how much Veronica has told you–”

“Told me?” Lance interrupted with a laugh, trying to seem as innocent as possible. “As if my sister would spill transnational secrets.”

Hunk’s mouth twisted disbelievingly. Pidge, too, shook her head.

“I know how it is to have a family in the Garrison, Lance,” she admonished, slipping out of his hold. “Everything is confidential until something slips out in the middle of Sunday lunch.”

“Well…” Lance squinted at the LED lights on the ceiling. “If something did slip out, like the existence of a certain wormhole-jumping craft that is supposed to make teludavs obsolete, then you couldn’t really blame Ronnie.”

“Especially since the only one with a high enough rank to know about that is Shiro.” Pidge groaned, pinching the bridge of her nose. “A lifetime in the military and he’s still the most trusting person I’ve ever met.”

“It’s not like he’s broadcasting it to the rest of the coalition,” Hunk pointed out good-naturedly. “It’s just Lance.”

Pidge didn’t look appeased. “I’ve seen Lance reveal all our identities because he wanted to impress an alien groupie.”

Lance grimaced at the memory. It had been a little after the war, when the Garrison was still arranging diplomatic meetings with the liberated planets. As a result of his words, he and the other paladins had been mobbed and Coran had to create a diversion to get them back in their ships.

“That was a long time ago,” Lance whined. “Besides, the so-called groupie was a child and you know I can’t resist children!”

Pidge fixed her glasses, her expression a mixture of aggravation and amusement. “If you ever have kids, you’re gonna spoil them rotten.”

Lance had to bite back his immediate response. His mind had come up with an image of what his and Pidge’s children might look like – brown haired and brown skinned and too smart for their own good – and the idea warmed him to the core. He had almost said that his kids would be fine, because of their mother’s genius.

His thoughts must have shown somehow because Lance caught Hunk looking at him with a smile that promised no-good.

Lance cleared his throat. “What were you two fighting about, anyway?”

“Hunk has been trying to access my daily annotations,” Pidge explained, moving to one of the nearby computer monitors.

Over her head, he and Hunk continued to share looks and mouthed words. He couldn’t really tell what his friend was trying to say, but Hunk pointed at Pidge, then at the computer, making exaggerated facial expressions that would have been comedic in any other circumstance.

At their apparent silence, Pidge’s fingers paused over the keyboard and she whipped around to look at them in suspicion.

“She means her diary,” Hunk interjected quickly, only to receive the brunt of her glare. “How am I supposed to know what’s going on over here if you won’t let me read it? I spend half my time out in space!”

“Can’t you just believe the things I tell you? Like, I don’t know,” this Pidge grumbled with a sour look on her face, “a normal person?”

Hunk snorted. “You want to talk to me about being normal?” He glanced at Lance, as if to ask if he had actually heard her correctly. “Pidge, we had to build you a dorm in the Mecatronics Advancement building, because you kept falling asleep in the lab.” Hunk turned back to Lance and pointed a thumb at Pidge. “She would be passed out with the new Rover just constantly knocking against her back.”

“So what?” She crossed her arms and jutted out her chin in defiance. “I like what I do. At least I’m not a busybody!”

Lance could feel a new fight brewing. Or maybe it was fairer to say that it was an old fight, one that every paladin had already had with Pidge.

“Katie.” His use of her given name made Pidge’s attention snap to Lance. “We’ve talked about this. Your therapist has talked about this.” He put a hand on her shoulder, then slid it down until their fingers intertwined. “I know you like feeling useful, but we’re not at war anymore. You can rest.”

“Exactly.” Hunk sighed, thankfully not making a big deal of Lance’s touches. He reached out to ruffle her hair. “We worry, girl.”

Pidge let go of Lance to bat Hunk’s hand away from her braid. The smile she gave them was tight-lipped but fond. “Then just say that, you idiot.”

“Why should I?” Hunk shrugged, sending her a sly look. “You only seem to believe it when it comes from Lance.”

He was saved from Pidge’s cold fury by his communicator going off. It sounded more like an alert than the normal message, filling the lab with high-pitched beeps that could have awoken even Pidge in her days of all-nighters working on the lions.

“Shoot!” Hunk frowned at the device. “I have a meeting on the other side of the complex!” He looked around with wide eyes.

Pidge picked up a folder that rested on her workbench and thrust it into Hunk’s chest.

“I hope you’re late,” she said in a deadpan, making both Lance and Hunk laugh.

“I’ll see you in the taxiway later, right?” Hunk asked, already half-out of the door.

Lance gave his friend a thumbs-up. “And we can go into town after the demonstration!”

When he turned to face Pidge, she was back at the computer, shaking her head at the screen with a smile still on her lips. He leaned against the table and simply stared at her as she worked, knowing full-well that part of her attention was still on him.

“What?” she caved after a few seconds. Lance batted his lashes at her. “Ugh, stop! If you want me to go into town, then I have to finish this calculation.”

“Eight years since we were cadets here and you’re still a stick-in-the-mud.” He watched her roll her eyes. “Please, you gotta come! I don’t know any of the cool spots anymore and Hunk has been off-planet!”

“As if that could stop Hunk from knowing the good restaurants,” Pidge muttered under her breath, frowning at something on the computer. She clicked one final key, before fixing her gaze on Lance. “Also, it’s actually been twelve years since we were cadets. Time might not have gone by for us, but things here certainly did change.”

“Quiznack, don’t even remind me of that!” Lance ran a hand across his face. “Rachel has finally shut up about how we’re the same age now.”

“Did she?” Pidge raised a brow at him, leaning her hip against the workbench in much the same way as Lance had. “Cause she still called me hermanita the last time I visited the farm.”

“Yeah, you ain’t getting rid of that nickname.” He chuckled. “It’s better than mami and pop-pop calling you Palomita, though.”

Machines whirred around them, a distant sort of sound that barely registered in Lance’s mind. His thoughts were stuck in the contentment displayed across Pidge’s features, like talking about their adventures on the farm filled her with as much warmth as it did him.

And maybe it did. The paladins and their families had grown closer during the years following the end of Voltron. They had all needed support in ways that only those who had also gone through the same grief could understand. His mother had talked to Colleen and Krolia multiple times, looking for advice on how to handle his PTSD, and Lance himself had reached out to Matt when he didn’t feel like speaking to his siblings or to the team.

It was odd to look back and remember how lonely he would feel back in Castle of Lions, when there were so many people now who he loved and who had gone to the ends of the universe for him.

“What are you thinking about?” Pidge tilted her head to the side, her eyes glinting with curiosity behind those glasses.

“About the team,” he answered, because it was partially true. “About how long we’ve known each other.”

Pidge nodded, but her gaze had shifted to the ground. Hesitance furrowed the line of her brow.

“Does being here–” She paused, then seemed to gather her courage. “Does being here remind you of Allura?”

The question caught him a little off guard. It was inevitable to think of Allura when looking back at their time as a team, but Lance hadn’t expected Pidge to focus on that. Keith’s words from a few months ago echoed in his mind, that Pidge couldn’t know he had finished mourning for Allura if Lance never told her.

“A little, I guess, but it’s not bad.” He made a humming noise, considering what to say. “It feels strange to realize we’ve been without her for longer than we ever knew her.”

She pushed away from the table, just a little, so that they were facing each other. “Time doesn’t have to limit how significant a person is to us.”

“I know, but no matter how important Allura was to me, I know now that she wasn’t the love of my life.” Lance let Pidge catch his gaze, willing her to recognize that he wasn’t lying. “Because my life goes on.”

“Which is why you’re here?” There was doubt in her tone, as well as something that Lance wished he could call hopefulness.

“Which is why I’m here,” he repeated with more certainty.

#plance #pidgance #lidge #flirtyrobot #cyance #katie holt #pidge gunderson #lance mcclain #vld lance #voltron #voltron legendary defender #vld #vld fanfiction #vld syl verse

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artsy0wl · 3 years ago

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He Needs You (A VLD fic)

I don’t care if I was late to the Voltron train, but I did enjoy most of it. I finally got around to it around the time season 8 had been released. This was a fic that I had written back when I had finished season six and then rewritten a month or two back.

It’s basically a post season 6 au addressing where Keith's mind may have been.

Since getting settled back on Earth, everyone started getting into a routine. When not forming Voltron or assisting new recruits, each Paladin found hobbies to keep their minds and bodies at ease. And with it, thoughts and emotions were finally beginning to sink in. Unfortunately, they were not all positive as fatigue and anxiety settled. While three of the Paladins were settling in well enough, over time, one had became noticeably absent.

It had been a few days and Keith had refused to make an appearance. He may have been known to withdraw when needed, but now, it was getting into concerning territory. And for those who were observant enough, the last time he was seen, he appeared exhausted. He never stuck around for questioning, so whether or not it was physical or emotional, it could not be determined.

Shiro was the first to really get concerned. The others, though uncertain, weren't too sure if it was as concerning as Shiro was. And while he couldn't blame them, Shiro seemed to be the only one who could affirm that this was a problem. Keith's sudden disappearance heightened the need to deal with concerns that have progressively been building up in Shiro. He entered the lounge area, hoping to find him hiding there. Unfortunately, it appeared to be a dead end. However, since Coran was in the room, there was a small amount of hope that he might have seen Keith.

"Have you seen Keith?" Shiro asked.

"Oh, Shiro." Coran greeted approaching him. "I was just about to ask you the same thing." He let out a sigh. "I'm starting to worry. I know he can get quite sullen, but never for this long."

"I know, that's why I'm worried." It was disappointing that Coran did not know, but it was a possibility. "I'll keep looking. If you see him, tell me immediately."

"Of course. You have my word."

The doors to the kitchen slid open. It had been a few hours since Shiro had spoke to Coran, and Shiro still wasn't having any luck finding the missing Paladin. He soon realized that he wasn't alone. Krolia was in the kitchen, sitting on the counter, snacking on some of Hunk's leftover lasagna. She was in a tank top and a towel was draped around her neck, clearly indicating that she had recently finished some training. Shiro grabbed a glass of water, frustrated by the lack of progress.

"I think I saw a red bundle go into the dark room." Krolia stated.

Shiro nearly choked on the water. T He was both shocked and intrigued by the statement. This was one of the few times she referred to her son in such a soft way. On top of that, this was the break he needed.

"And you're just bringing this up know?" Shiro choked.

"Well he's been staking out in the infirmary, the armory, and the library up until today." Krolia admitted. "With how often he was there, I thought you were aware. But based on your reaction, I guess not. I bring this up now because photography doesn't quite seem like his thing."

Shiro couldn't deny her observation. He was usually spotted in those places along with the training room. Keith must have been shuffling it up recently, so that no one knew which place he was in at what time in an attempt to hide from everyone. The dark room was initially added as a recreational space for some of the crew and to show Allura and Coran an old, but still enjoyable, way to develop photos. That said, photography wasn't really Keith's strong suit, so it was the perfect hiding place when he finally did disappear. Not that he was open to being photographed much.

"He's become a bit of a recluse these days." Shiro explained, setting the cup down. "At first we thought it was Keith being Keith. But I started to notice that it got progressively worse the last few days and he pretty much disappeared yesterday."

"He does seem to have a lot bothering him lately."

It was good to know that she seemed aware of the situation. However, her tone signified that she hadn't talked to him about it herself. Shiro wasn't sure if that had to do with her unable to get to Keith before he hid, if she tried and he shut her out, or if she was still catching up on all of those years of being absent and was unsure how to approach this kind of situation.

"And you haven't talked to him?" Shiro curiously inquired.

Krolia set her plate down and hopped of the counter so she could give Shiro her full attention. She clearly had something on her mind and might have known something that Shiro didn't. She leaned against the counter for a moment, thinking of how to word it.

"Well, I think I know what's troubling him, but I don't feel like it's my place to intervene." Krolia explained.

Her reason was a little confusing. She knew, but why she didn't want to get involved was a curious thing. Shiro didn't believe it was a Galra way of parenting, given how she wanted to be in his life compared to Zarkon, but it was still a little weird. Was it because they had only been reunited as recently as they were? Or was there more to it? Krolia noticed this and knew she had to elaborate.

"Keith's shook up about the whole clone incident." Krolia stated. "Part of him did fall for it, not wanting to believe that they truly lost you. However, when your clone went A.W.O.L., it wasn't the kindest experience to him." Krolia flinched slightly as she recalled what her son told him about the incident. "In short, he ended up having to fight you, someone he cares deeply for. And you weren't exactly the nicest person to him in that moment. Quite the opposite in fact." She recalled the pain in his eyes not long after that fight. "Your clone fought him, degraded him, and even tried to kill him. He still has the burn mark to prove it. Permanently at that." Krolia stood up, a little disheartened. "He's confused. Scared that such a prominent figure in his life turned evil and tried to kill him. I bet that image hasn't fully gone away despite your return." Krolia sighed, looking at Shiro with concern. "As his mother, I want to do what I can for him. I want to help him get through this and tell him that everything's okay. However, I think he needs you to help him with this. He needs to talk to you. I know you were not the one that did this to him, something I'm sure he's aware of in some part, but it was a physical copy of you that caused it. It's your image that's imprinted on the memory. I can't talk him through something that I know you would be better handling."

Krolia began walking towards the door. One quick whiff of her shirt was all she needed to tell her she needed a shower. She looked back at Shiro, urgency in her eyes.

"I'd hurry of I were you." Krolia emphasized. "Who knows how long he'll be there."

The red tint of the dark room was enough to make the search for Keith difficult. Shiro could manage once his eyes adjusted, but it was still a bit of a challenge. When he didn't see Keith out in the open, Shiro began opening the cabinets. He eventually found Keith hiding in one with his kneels held against his chest. Kneeling down, Shiro got as good of a look as he could at Keith. Hair blocked Keith's face for the most part, denying Shiro access to a visual of his face and expression even more so than the already hindering lighting of the room did. Keith wasn't moving outside of shifting whenever he breathed.

"Hey Keith." Shiro greeted.

Keith didn't acknowledge Shiro's presence. Or at least he didn't appear to. Keith still didn't move either. Shiro thought about what to say next.

"Mind if I join you?" Shiro asked. When he didn't get a respond, he tried to think of something to lighten the mood. "You're right, even with a levitating arm, I still couldn't fit in a cabinet like this. I'm a little too husky."

When Keith ignored his attempt at, albeit dark, humor, Shiro knew he had to do something. His arm reached inside, aiming to grab Keith's right shoulder and nudge Keith out. The motion startled Keith, causing him to panic. He started writhing in the grip, wanting to get out of it.

"Let me go!" Keith gasped.

Shiro refused Keith's demands, not wanting Keith to disappear again. Once he managed to nudge Keith out enough, Shiro wrapped his other arm around Keith and yanked him out and set Keith on his lap. The movement caused Keith to start kicking his feet out. Not hard enough to hurt Shiro, as even in his panic, Keith didn't want to hurt Shiro, but enough to try fighting back. Shiro didn't care, tightening his hold. He didn't say a word, wanting to wait for Keith to calm down. Shiro didn't have to wait long as Keith's exhaustion took over and slowed his movement down. Once Keith stopped, Shiro finally gave Keith room to move.

Keith almost bolted, but Shiro's prosthetic arm was already behind him, stopping him. Keith gave up the option to run as he locked eyes with Shiro, silently letting Shiro know he wasn't leaving. Shiro's arm returned to his side, accepting Keith's admission of defeat.

The duo got comfortable, sitting on their knees. Shrio began inspecting Keith for damage, lightly brushed Keith's bangs aside. The first thing Shiro noticed was the dark circles under Keith's eyes. From what Shiro could tell, Keith hadn't slept in days. If he had to guess, at least four days by his estimation. However, exhaustion wasn't the only problem. Keith was clearly suffering physically. Not only did Keith have noticeable dark circles under his eyes, but he also seemed thinner. It wasn't at an absolutely terrible state, but Keith's cheekbones were starting to show through, which was a sign that Keith had been starving himself.

Unfortunately, this wasn't the only reason why Shiro was there. These were just the physical symptoms to a much larger problem. Keith's emotional turmoil. Shiro knew he had to address the anxiety and stress. As much as they both were going to hate it, for Keith's health, it had to be dealt with.

"Talk to me." Shiro requested. "I can't watch you suffer like this."

The room went silent. Waiting for Keith to speak up, Shiro hoped that Keith knew that he would always be there for him. Keith's pride may have prevented him from opening up as easily as the others, but his isolation was not the way to go about fixing the issue.

"I didn't give up on you." Keith whispered. "I knew something was wrong. I knew you wouldn't hurt us. They were suspecting something was wrong, but I knew it wasn't like you." Keith bit his lip, shaking slightly. "The next thing I knew, I found myself having to fight my closest friend. And no matter what I said, he wanted to kill everyone. To kill me."

Shiro was relieved that Keith wasn't being difficult. Be it due to his exhaustion or knowing he couldn't run forever, Shiro welcomed Keith's honesty. However, hos honesty was not painless. Hearing Keith go from hopeful to confused, from calm to near death hurt Shiro. It was a lot to put on Keith, and he hated that it was his own imaged that caused it. Keith flinched slightly, almost closing his eyes. His body was trying to speak to him, but Keith refused to listen.

"You need to sleep." Shiro advised.

Keith shook his head in refusal. The thought of sleep seemed problematic. An enigma that was undesirable to Keith.

"Every time I close my eyes I see you trying to kill me." Keith stated, picturing the fight. "I see glowing eyes and a voice demanding for my death." Keith's breath hitched. "I know everything's fine, and that it wasn't really you, but I can't let it go. I'm terrible."

Shiro had no response to that. He knew Keith was demeaning himself out of grief, but he did not wish to speak incorrectly. Keith repositioned himself, bringing his knees to his chest. Shiro may have been able to get through to Keith and help save everyone, but he wasn't able to prevent this. The pain of losing Shiro. Realizing that a fake was in their midst and led the team while Keith was away. Having to fight someone that Keith held close. Keith's stress and emotional baggage had to be through the roof. it was a lot to process, but Shiro didn't blame him for any of it.

Looking at the scar on Keith's face put something else entirely on Shiro, guilt. A hand gently traced along it as Shiro thought about its cause. All of this was caused by Keith's dedication and an outcome that wasn't deserved.

"I'm sorry." Shiro apologized. "I'm sorry you had to suffer because of a manipulative witch and a clone. You didn't deserve what you went through."

"No I'm sorry." Keith argued. "You did everything you could, died even, to make sure everyone was safe. I just took over for you and failed as their leader."

Shiro's hand stayed on the side of Keith's face, wanting to give Keith a sense of security. A sense of reality, letting him know that Shiro was there. Shiro hated that Keith was blaming himself for the situation. While maybe not perfect, Keith did so well with the Paladins and Marmora, and he deserved credit for it.

"That's not true." Shiro disagreed. "You did so good with Voltron and the Blades of Mamora. You led the Paladins so well and I'm impressed with how well you took control of situations given to you. I just wish you didn't have to suffer to the extent you did. I am so proud of you Keith."

Grabbing Keith's shoulders, Shiro brought him in for a hug. Keith didn't have the strength to really fight back, but he did attempt to squirm away to no avail. Keith just accepted the embrace, actually wanting it deep down. He wanted that feeling of comfort in Shiro's arms.

"It's okay." Shrio reaffirmed. "I'm here now Keith and everything is going to be okay. Those dreams aren't real, and the clone no longer exists."

Keith rested his head against Shiro, soaking in his surroundings. Being with Shiro, the real Shiro, was surreal. The black and grey uniform, Shiro's voice, the smell of Shiro's aftershave, all of it was familiar. And none of it threatening or fake. This was real. Shiro was real. Tears sprinkled down Keith's face. He didn't want to cry, but he couldn't stop.

"It's okay." Shiro whispered, gently rubbing the back of Keith's head. "Everything's going to be okay."

Several hours later, Krolia went looking for her son and Shiro. Figuring that Shiro successfully made it to Keith in time, she entered the dark room. Scanning the room, a dark lump on the ground caught her eye and caused her to grin softly.

Shiro was sitting on the floor with his back against one of the cabinets. His eyes were shut and he was softly snoring. In his arms was Keith, who was comfortably sitting in Shiro's lap. His head was resting on Shiro's chest and he too had his eyes closed. Keith was finally sleeping, and Krolia was glad that he was. Based on their position, she knew they must have talked it out and Keith must have accepted Shiro's comfort. She knelt down, softly patting Keith's head. He unconsciously shuffled slightly, loving the affection.

"Good night." Krolia whispered.

She exited the dark room, not wanting to disturb them. She got the answers she wanted and her son got the peace that he deserved. In the back of her mind, Krolia was thankful for Shiro's help. everything was going to be okay, and that was all that mattered.

#Voltron legendary defenders #VLD #keith kogane #krolia #shiro #takashi shirogane #fanfic #fanfiction #feels #AU #Shiro and Keith #Angst

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