#also I really wanna do my nails long I hate having short nails

[lilalangforth]

I am tired of doing manual labor during summer. I can't wait till next week

[monstersflashlight]

Patreon commission for anon

Request: I was thinking a fem!vampire reader that works at a coffee shop and she has fallen in love with a werewolf customer, but he’s kinda oblivious and a bit of a himbo, and when she finally confesses he’s like…completely taken aback but not in a bad way? And if you feel like it sexy times, but I’m also open to serious fluffy stuff too…ummm the reader is chubby tho, like…I would really appreciate it if you keep it either neutral or make it apparent that the reader is short and chubs.

“You know I don’t like coffee?”

Werewolf (name: Toby) x fem!vampire chubby reader || heavy make out, fluff, pretty much SFW || TW: internalized fatphobia (very light9

“Order for Toby!” You try not to get amused by his taken aback stand as he approaches you.

He always looks so confused when you call his name that you don’t even know why he comes here in the first place. You always have to bite down on your lip to avoid giggling when he takes the first sniff of his coffee. Coffee black, two sugars, one vanilla. Every evening he comes and asks for that, even though he clearly doesn’t like it. It amuses you how he clearly wants to order something else but ends up ordering “the same” everyday.

“Tha- thanks,” Toby’s stutter makes you smile at him, your fangs glistening under the fluorescent and catching his eye. He licks his lips predatory, like he’s savoring your smell in the air, but once again he doesn’t say anything, he just leaves.

You grunt at the next customer, getting angry at yourself for being hopeful that such a cute werewolf would give you the time of the day.

That’s why after a couple weeks writing down your number on his cup and not hearing back from him, you had enough and start getting your break when you know he’s going to show up. The first day you almost give up and get back to work when his soft tone asks for you. But you endure. He didn’t call you. He didn’t show interest in you. Maybe he just likes the way you make coffee (even though he frowns every time he picks it up).

But the third day he shows up in a different time, making you prepare his order the same way you always do, writing your number one last time on the bottom, always hopeful that this time would be the time. When he grabs his coffee, you tell your coworker you are taking a break, wanting to get far for him. He doesn’t let you. He follows you to the back room, your coworker not even caring that he does that.

He crowds against you in the tiny room, he’s so much taller than you that you have to look up when he asks: “Why are you avoiding me?” His tone is a bit hurt and you have to swallow your regrets, because this is his fault.

You press a finger against his chest, accusatory, when you ask back: “Why didn’t you call me?”

“What?” He looks completely confused, and you want to kiss his stupid face so much you have to press your long nails into your palms, the little pain bringing you back to reality.

“I’ve been leaving my number on your cup for weeks and you never called, but then you show up here everyday even though you don’t like coffee just to see me. I don’t get it. I don’t understand it,” you explain. You try not to sound hurt, but it permeates your voice either way. It did hurt, it hurt so much that he didn’t call any of the times you left him your phone number.

“You know I don’t like coffee?” He deadpans, making you even more angry at him, forgetting your pain at his rejection in order to look at him. If you were a cartoon character you’d have smoke coming out of your ears.

“That’s what you wanna focus on?!” You whisper-shout to him. He steps back, completely taken aback by your tone.

“I- Sorry. What?” He questions again, his puppy eyes making you want to melt.

You want to be mad at him, you want to be furious, but when you open your mouth what comes out is: “You don’t... You don’t like big girls, is that it?” You hate yourself a tiny bit for letting your insecurities get the best of you.

Toby’s face contorts in what feels like a caricature. “What?! NO! I love your curves, I want to take a bite of every curve of your body, good goddess you look like my best fantasy came to life,” he says everything so fast that your brain is a bit dizzy by his confession.

When you fully register his words, you are even more confused than before. “Then why didn’t you call?” You are really missing something here. If what he says is true, and what you say is true… Why haven’t you been on a date or something?

“How would I?” His confusion is so clear in his tone, and his ears twitch so adorably when he tilts his head to the side that you want to squeeze him until he’s just a puddle of goo on the floor.

You take the coffee cup and turn it around, splashing some of the contents on the floor. You show him that there’s indeed a number written on the bottom. “My number. In your cup. Everyday,” you repeat.

His surprise is so evident that he gapes like a fish at the numbers and then back at you. Numbers. You. Numbers. You. “Wait. Wait. You like me? You gave me your number?” His question is followed by some mumbling that you don’t catch, like he’s talking to himself. Or more like cursing himself.

“Yes! I’ve been trying to get you to notice me since you first came in,” you confess. You are so glad you can’t blush, because if you could, you’d be as red as a tomato.

He repeats: “You have?” His surprise shouldn’t be as adorable as it is, and it shouldn’t make you want to kiss him senseless. It should make you mad at him that he’s been so obvious to your flirting.

“Yes!” You exclaim, throwing your arms up, exasperated.

“I- I… I didn’t know.” His tone is soft, almost a whisper, and his ears keep twitching over his head. He’s embarrassed, you realize. And that makes you want to coo at him. “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry,” he keeps chanting as he squeezes your body against his. Your face barely gets to his shoulders, but the way he squeezes you against him makes every worry you had about him disappear. He wasn’t rejecting you, he was just too dumb to realize you were into him. Stupid werewolf himbo.

Toby’s arms hold you so tightly against him that you fear he’s going to break you. “Dude, if I wasn’t a vampire you would break me,” you let out.

“Oops. Sorry.” He lets go of you and looks like you just gave him the best Christmas present ever. “Can… Can I kiss you?” He asks, his big paws holding your face tenderly.

“I thought you’d never ask.” You grab him by the collar of his shirt and pull down with all your supernatural strength, giggling against his mouth when you hear the ripping sound. But you don’t care. And he doesn’t either.

Your lips are against his, and your fangs are pinching his lips as he whimpers. You deepen the kiss as he grabs you by the waist and pulls you up, your legs wrapping around his middle as you grind against his toned abdomen. His hands find your ass and he starts groping you, his tongue dancing against yours. You are in heaven. After so many weeks of pining, you can’t believe you are grinding against his body as he caresses yours. You’ve never been happier to be with a supernatural, his strength coming in handy to support your weight without any problem. It’s exhilarating.

You make out like horny teenagers for what feels like hours, but it’s probably no more than fifteen minutes. You are breathing heavily against his neck, your fangs gracing his artery without biting down, as he groans and moans, rocking his impressive erection up to meet your needy core. You want to bite him so bad, but you know it’s not the place. Your venom can induce some kind of frenzy in werewolves and you really can’t have him fucking you raw in the backroom of the cafeteria. You like this job.

“Your break is up,” a voice says behind you, making you let out a short scream as Toby giggles, his face buried in your neck and his hands still squeezing your ass like he’s kneading bread.

He lets you down and pats your ass once more, kissing the tip of your nose softly. “I’ll pick you up when your shift is done. I think we have things… to discuss.” The innuendo on his words and the way he looks up and down your body like you are his next snack is enough to make your non-existent pulse race.

You can’t wait for your shift to be over.

Reminder that you can commission me (info here) or suscribe to my Patreon (info here). And that my second account is @whiskis

[sourlemon478]

Path To Nowhere (General NSFW Headcanons)

---

Please use this as a reference for my heavily preferred characters to write for. You don’t see your girl? Not one of them (I consider Hella a child and will not be writing for her ever).

Minors DNI

Bai Yi

So. Much. Teasing. I’m sorry, this was the first thing that came to mind—doesn’t matter if she’s teasing you or you’re teasing her, she loves it and will play into it.

She’s definitely a switch, not minding domming or subbing, but having certain ones she prefers in the moment.

When she doms, she’s absolutely ruthless. It doesn’t matter how much you think you can take, she’s going to test those limits to their furthest point. She won’t stop until you’re begging.

As for subbing, she’s a total brat. She’ll whine and complain, but ultimately, she’s just trying to get a reaction. If she thinks she’s going too far, she’ll straight up ask, and she expects you to just tell her if she is.

Sex is long, exhausting, but fun. She won’t do anything she knows you don’t like, but she does occasionally pull out random surprises.

You can normally tell if she wants to dom or sub, just on how she talks. Is she begging? She wants you to ruin her. Is she being pushy (playfully)? She wants to ruin you.

Shut her up with a kiss and she’ll just get even more aroused, practically trying to strip you/herself right then and there.

Kisses can range from short pecks, to sloppy, long, and deep. Really depends on her mood.

If you ignore her in hopes she just finds something else to do, she might… but more often than not she’ll just push you down and take you right then and there.

Time and place doesn’t matter, are you free? Great! That’s all she needs.

It could be in an actual bedroom, some random alleyway, on her bike, none of it really matters to her. If she’s horny, she doesn’t want to wait.

On the very rare occasion, she’ll want it gentle and sensual. Normally, sex with her is rough and kinky, but if she’s in a bad mood or just wants to be romantic, she’ll take it slow. This is especially the case if your sad. She’ll hold you tightly and do everything in her power to just make you feel better.

She’s a big fan of leaving nail marks, whether on you or herself. Just seeing your scratched up back in the morning turns her on so much, it might just make her want a second round.

Not really a fan of restraints… at least when she’s wearing them. She’ll tie you up without question if you ask, but if you want to do it to her? She hates it. Though there is the rare occasion she’ll comply and actually enjoy it, it is quite rare.

You wanna know the secret to getting her going right away? Buy her a gift. It doesn’t even need to be big, it can cost you a dollar, but it will just make her so happy she needs you right then and there.

Cinnabar

She’s really gentle-

Like there isn’t much power play at all, and she’s a bit apprehensive about it when it comes up.

It’s easier for her when it’s roleplay, but all together she just likes you to be equals.

Even still, she can get extremely kind of possessive. Especially if shes annoyed. She’ll start biting, scratching, and marking up your whole body. She wants you to know you’re hers, but that she’s also yours.

If she goes too far though, she’ll get very apologetic, and very worried she might have hurt you.

She just wants to hold and coddle you, make you feel special and know she’ll always protect you.

Sex doesn’t happen often, but when it does she makes sure it’s the best it can be.

Missions come first most of the time, and she just gets annoyed when she’s horny or being distracted on them, so it’s generally prepland.

She really is just pretty vanilla, possessiveness aside… But it’s such a nice vanilla who can really complain?

If she knows you like something kinky, she’ll do her best to try and give it to you, but it might be sloppy and she’ll constantly be asking if she’s doing it right.

It’s kind of cute when she finally gets it though. Her confidence skyrockets and she really gets into it!

Is a really big stickler for safety first-

Public sex and quickies really aren’t her thing… She might occasionally be fine with something controlled and semi-public, but she really doesn’t see a point in sex thats short and quick

Oh also, pet names. She doesn’t do it in public, but alone? It’s all she uses.

Eirene

Just like Cinnabar, work comes first, but if she has some time in between meetings, she’ll squeeze a break in for you too.

She’s a lot more comfortable domming than subbing, not because of the power over you specifically, but just because she likes to know what's happening at all times. No surprises.

It’s kind of hard to tell when she’s in the mood, because more often than not she just… won’t bring it up, as to her it’s not really important, but once you get to recognize her slight shift in tone and gaze, you know you’ve figured it out.

She likes to pamper you in gifts when she thinks you’ve earned it. Sure she won’t throw millions your way… but I mean, her definition of pocket change might as well be your monthly income. This very much included expensive hotel rooms, lavish beds, and whatever you may want for that night.

There’s no half-assing too her—go big or go home.

That being said, sometimes some in the moment sex happens. And normally she’s absolutely ruthless.

You think you can distract her during work and not be punished? Mind you, she’ll make sure you enjoy it… but it’s still a punishment.

You’ll probably be left exhausted, in tears, and covered in markings.

If she’s extra “mad”, she won’t even let you finish, she’ll just edge you until she finally feels like letting you release. This can last anywhere from till when work is done to three in the morning. Whatever she’s feeling really.

She’s okay with markings that can be covered up, but she much prefers to mark you rather than them on herself.

Her moans are short and she’s clearly holding them back, but when she finally lets go oh lord is it gorgeous.

She especially loves using her fingers—just feeling the way you tighten and pulse around her gets her going so much.

This is just a huge thing I see her doing but like… getting you to masturbate in front of her is one of her favourite punishments. Watching you squirm as you try to put on a good show for her well getting yourself off makes her feel special. It’s just so raw and personal that she wants to burn it into her memory forever.

You’re either edged forever or fucked mercilessly and brought to orgasm over and over and over again. There is no inbetween.

Hamel

So. Much. Foreplay.

She doesn’t like to be touched much, so you have to build up to it! Sure, you’re her exception, but don’t surprise her. Keep your hands where you know she won’t be surprised, and slowly, I mean slowly build up to it.

Sometimes she doesn’t even want to have sex, finding the fact that you even want that from her to be enough to make her happy. (Okay but like I HC her as on the aroace spectrum).

When it does happen, it’s long and special. She’ll praise you to no end, doing everything she can to make you feel you.

For someone who doesn’t like physical touch much, she’s a very good kisser. It’s the most she does on an average day, so she’s gotten pretty good.

Her confidence is a bit fragile, and she’ll more often than not feel like she’s doing something wrong. The more vocal you are, the better she’ll be.

She wouldn’t be very kinky at all, but similar to Eirene she finds masturbation intimate, raw, and special. Mind you, I mean mutual masturbation and not being told to as a punishment, but same thing.

The act of sex itself and the pleasure it derives isn’t really why she does it. That means nothing to her. All she wants is to see you enjoy yourself.

Quickies and public are strict no’s, no matter what.

She thinks they’re dumb, especially quickies. What’s the point in that? If she’s having sex, she wants it to be personal and intimate, and both of those make her feel like she looses that.

Well she is rarely ever horny without a prompt, on the rare occasion she just gets in the mood. You’ll know when she is, because she’ll feel awkward touching you, not because she doesn’t think you want to, but because she just doesn’t know… how-

Neither of you really take the lead normally, but when you can tell she’s personally in the mood, you’re gonna need to be the one to start it up.

Okay… slight MDLG. Hear me out. Nothing like age-play, but she acts sort of like a mom, and doesn’t exactly dislike being called mommy. She’s not sure how she feels about it, because on one end, she thinks it’s a bit awkward at first, but she enjoys coddling you!

And oh my god, the dancing- she doesn’t do anything in specific, but just the way she moves… After a performance, she more or less expects you to be wanting nothing more than just to fuck her.

She finds it surprisingly ego boosting, but she won’t admit it.

When you guys are trying something kinky, she doesn’t like gag’s or blindfolds. She wants to see your full expression, especially your eyes. Of course, that extends to wanting to hear you. When you moan her name softly, it sends a shiver down her spine.

She's honestly a really good power bottom... I mean, she doesn't care much about you guys domming or subbing, or even who's on top or bottom, but she just naturally good at it you know?

Langley

She'll let you think you can top her, but only think.

This smug expression will be across her face well she teases and taunts you.

Once you finally give, she'll practically flip you and punish you for being a bad girl for even trying.

If you're good though, you'll be treated like it.

Okay but why do I think she'd be really good at tying you up? Like, handcuffs are nice, but I see her just being really good with some rope...

Occasionally, she'll use a toy or two if she really wants to overstimulate you, but more often than not, she likes apparel and accessories more.

She'll put a collar and leash on you, lay back, and get you to ride a strap-on, digging her nails into you're waist as she helps you fuck yourself on her.

On the nail thing though, I don't think she's that big on markings.

To be honest, I think mostly all the sinners are somewhat possessive, but she doesn't feel like she needs something like a mark to prove your hers. She trusts that you'll know this without it.

That being said, if she had to pick one kind of thing she likes, it's handcuff and spanking marks. Even if your skin is just red from where she hit you, she enjoys it.

Unlike Bai Yi, who gets a bit carried away, Langley goes a little far sometimes to make you push your limit.

I think she can be intimate, but it's not normally what she considers. If she notices you're in a bad mood, sad, or anything like that, she'll be pretty vanilla, kissing and massaging you all over.

Oh also gun play, idk seems viable-

Stargazer

God does she know how to get excited and wanting the day to just flash by...

Before you have a mission, or will just be gone all day, she'll pull you aside and tell you in heavy detail exactly what she's going to do to you when you get back.

Even so, she'll leave a tiny bit of vagueness to let your imagination run wild all day.

There isn't really Dom/sub dynamics, and only light top/bottom ones. She's like Cinnabar where she prefers for you guys to be equals.

Sure, she'll tease you, but she doesn't mind being on the giving or receiving end.

She adores seeing you in between her legs, her thighs locked around your your head, brushing your ears as she tells you just how well you're doing.

When she's giving, she's especially good with her fingers, but if she uses both her mouth and hand? You're gone.

Sex is actually pretty slow, as like Hammel she doesn't like things to quick and purely for pleasure.

She loves feeling up your whole body, groping you playfully as she covers you in lipgloss marking from kisses.

I can't see her liking love bites or nail markings, instead preferring to see your makeup smeared, hair disheveled, and sweat covering your body.

Queening is one of her favorite positions, at least when she's on top. You're focused on her, and she knead at your scalp we'll she rolls her hips over your face.

She has a bit of a praise kink, as she will give you all kinda of praises we'll she fucks you. These can range from your body, voice, or whatever your doing to her.

Even still, she doesn't have much of a filter when she isn't liking something. She'll tell it to you straight, but if you look sad, she'll throw in a bit of a compliment.

Finally, I think she likes to see you in either her own clothes or certain outfits. She'll hand pick outfits for you to wear and most of the time

Zoya

She’s so rough… but not in a bondage kind of way, more like a primal “I’ll do what I want,” way.

She’ll bite you, spank you, fuck you as roughly as she can, all because she feels like it. Does she need a better reason?

There is a bit of possessiveness behind her, but it’s not as extreme as Cinnabar.

Kind of like Langley, she finds it amusing if you try to take control, and we'll she won't let you order her around, if she's feeling lazily she lay back and let you do your thing.

"Just one more round," she'll huff, even if you look exhusted.

This same phrase will be repeated time and time again, and she'll only stop when she's finally tired.

She loves sex toys, even if she doesn't think to use them sometimes. She'll bury her strap-on into you and fuck you for what seems like hours.

She'll push your face into a pillow as she pounds into you, tugging your hair spanking you time and time again.

When she's bored of that position, she'll effortlessly pick you up and bounce you on the strap-on.

This will continue until you're practically passed out or her hips are tired. Even so, she'll figure out a way to keep the sex going.

Like Bai Yi, she doesn't care when and where you are, if she wants you she wants you.

She can ignore the feeling of she's busy, but the moment she can get some time in, shell push you against a wall and either bury her fingers inside of you, or get you to go down on her.

Her sex drive is high, but she has enough control over it that even you don't know when she's going to want to have a long, and I mean long, session.

It's almost animalistic, how rough and just herself she is, and she wouldn't want it any other way.

She wants you both to just give into your most primal urges, finding things like shame and worry stupid.

She loves hearing you moan her name when she fucks you, covering your body in marks and bruises. The louder you are the better.

When you've both winded down, she'll check in on you and make sure you're okay. If you can't walk, she'll pick you up and place you in a bath/shower, helping clean you off.

She'll kiss you, cuddle with you, whatever you want because she kind of feels bad for basically fucking you stupid, but she's really more proud of both herself and you.

I can see her taking her time on rare nights though, holding herself back from going to hard if she thinks being slow and intimate is more important.

She simply loves your body and wants it all to herself <3

[honeyedmiller]

American Jesus | Javier Peña

pairing: javier peña x f!reader

warnings: smut, literally just smut, smutty smut smut, and oh look, more smut! (also mentions of smoking, edging, defying religion???? [I guess if you wanna call it that or even say that???], cursing, pet names, no use of y/n... also, this is not meant to be disrespectful toward anyone's religion at all. just wanted to put that out there. so yeah. that's all I think). 18+. minors dni.

word count: 1.9k

*= i changed the lyric from green eyes to brown eyes for obvious reasons

based on the song 'American Jesus' by Nessa Barrett.

-

He's got a cross on his neck, but he spends Sundays in my bed

Javier's cross necklace dangles in your face as he hovers over you, lips parted, pupils blown, as he moves his thick fingers in and out of you in a salacious manner. The sounds you're emitting from your throat are nothing short of erotic as you call out his name like a prayer, nails leaving plentiful scratch marks along his back.

"Look at you, cariño. You're a mess just from my fingers. Can't wait to find out what this cock will do to you." His voice is domineering, and you can hear the fucking smirk the bastard has on his lips. He's been edging you for the last fifteen minutes, and you were about to lose your shit if he kept this up. You ached for release, bad, and your impending orgasm was so hot and heavy in your core that tears started to well in your eyes at the near torture he was doing unto you.

"Fuck, Javi, please, please fucking let me cum." The tears fall down your cheeks, and he coos at you.

"Ay mi pobrecita. Since you asked so nicely." He presses the pad of his thumb to your sensitive clit, rubbing circles around it. His skilled fingers have you coming undone in no time, your orgasm ripping through you like a wave in the ocean. You're screaming his name, and there's no doubt his neighbors absolutely hate you both right now.

He's my blue jean little baby, with a halo on his head

"Quit staring at my ass, cariño." Javier warns, giving you a pointed look.

"What? Not my fault it looks good in those tight jeans." The shit-eating grin you toss his way makes him roll his eyes and shake his head. The light behind Javier gave him a specific glow on the top of his head, giving him a halo effect. The scene in front of you was ironic, really, because Javier was nowhere near an angel. Not with that fucking sinful tongue of his, that did so much more than just shit talk.

That same tongue had you calling out god's name with the way it worked its magic on you.

He's got lips like cherry wine, and cigarette smoke on his breath

Javier's lips were nothing short of addicting. Any chance you got to kiss him, you did. His plush lips always kept you in a daze, and drunk on the man that is Javier Peña. He never kissed you half-assedly, either. You often wondered if he kissed other women the way he kissed you, too.

"What's on your mind cariño?" His eyes are trained on you lost in thought, curiosity getting the best of him.

"Nothing, Javi."

"Don't give me that. Seriously, what's on your mind?" His hand grazes your thigh as he takes a drag of his cigarette.

"Do you kiss your other women like you kiss me?" You blurt out your previous thought without even giving it a once-over in your mind.

"There are no other women, baby. Not anymore," His hand is feather-light as it trails up your thigh, sending goosebumps down your legs. He removes the cigarette from his mouth before pressing his lips to yours with such neediness, never letting you get a chance to catch your breath.

Javier was a passionate man when he wanted to be, and goddamn did he never hold back when it came to you. His hand found its way to your core as he rubbed over the fabric covering you. You moaned his name out which to him, was heaven to his ears.

Before yanking your underwear off of you, he paused and whispered against your lips.

"Only you."

He's got pretty long brown hair, and brown* eyes that look like sex

Javier’s dark brown eyes are ardent as they roam over every inch of your body. His dark locks were a mess as he indeed looked very freshly fucked… because he was.

You’d just blown his mind with possibly some of the best sex he's ever had in his life. No one compared to you, and you made sure to let him know that. He was your man.

He was trying to catch his breath after what had to've been the fifth orgasm he's had tonight. You were a vixen tonight and nothing could've stopped you from pleasing your man, over and over and over again.

Javier had been incredibly stressed at work, and you knew he needed to take the edge off, so you were there to let him know you'd take care of him and his needs tonight.

Javier thought you were a god send. No woman had ever made him cum like that in his entire sex life, and fuck if he was going to ever let you go. Not only were you amazing in bed, but you showed him that you genuinely cared about him and his well-being, not just through sex.

His hooded eyes scanned your features, looking at you lovingly.

"Mine." Was all he said before pulling you to him, kissing your head and wrapping his arms around you before he drifted off into a much needed sleep.

Knees down at your altar, please don’t fail me now

"Fuck, corazón, you look breathtaking in that dress." Javier's eyes are ravenous once more as they rake over your body with absolute hunger. It was a hot day in Colombia, so the black flowy minidress you were wearing was fitting for the sticky weather.

Javier pulled you in by your hips so you were flush against his strong body. Your hands rested comfortably on his chest. You felt his elevated heart rate beneath your fingertips, and your own heart swelled at how you made him feel. He may not have always told you, but he definitely showed you.

Javier slowly sank to his knees in front of you, leaving you confused.

"What are you doing, Javi?" Your voice is meek as your own heart rate starts to pick up.

He doesn't say a word as he lifts the hem of your dress up, exposing your thighs and light pink thong you chose to wear for the day. One of his hands cradled the back of your thigh while the other held the dress up, and he moved his face to you to kiss your clothed core.

You moan softly at the feeling. Javier's eyes are full of determination as he hooks the hand that was previously holding your dress up into the hem of your underwear, pulling the cloth down your legs with ease.

"Javi, we're going to be late to dinner with Steve and Connie."

Ignoring your comment, he moans at the sight of your already soaked core, moving his head back to you and under your dress. He gently grabs the back of both of your thighs this time, coaxing you to spread your legs a little further. You have to put your hands on his shoulders to balance yourself.

He wasted no time indulging you as he licked a hot, wet stripe up your core. You gasped in shock, knees already wanting to buckle under you.

"Mm, baby you always taste so fuckin' good. Fuck." And he doesn't stop lapping you up and sucking your swollen clit until you convulse violently above him, causing you to sink to your knees as well.

"I've got you, corazón. Always."

You know all my secrets American Jesus, baby

"You're terrible at hiding your emotions, you know." Javier is watching you with an amused look, cocking an eyebrow up at you.

"Fuck off, Javi." You roll your eyes, and his gaze darkens.

"I'd like to fuck something, alright." His voice drips like pure venom as he watches your every move. You immediately feel an ache in your core at his words, and of course, your face shows it all.

"Too easy. I know all your secrets, baby, every last one of them." Javier chuckles at your disposition, an annoyed look overtaking your needy one.

You stick a middle finger up at him, rolling your eyes.

"C'mere, then, cariño. Don't keep me waiting."

Won’t you take me to Heaven tonight?

Javier snapped his hips at a pace against yours that nearly knocked the breath out of you. He always stretched you in such an intoxicating way, you almost wanted to stay like this forever.

"Look at you, cariño. Fucking you dumb on my cock and you're taking it so fucking well. That's it baby." Javier's voice was thick and full of lust, a sheen coat of sweat all over his body. His focus was solely on you and the inaudible moans coming from you as your jaw was slack and eyebrows were laced together.

He gripped your hips so hard you were sure he was going to leave bruises, but you fucking loved it. You were drunk on Javier's cock and he knew it.

He had you seeing stars with the pace he was going. It was ruthless, relentless, and almost unbearable, but the pain quickly subsided into pleasure every time he bottomed out into you.

You were convinced being with him like this, as rough and pleasurable as it was, was what heaven felt like and damn, you never wanted to leave.

You know you’re my weakness American Jesus, save me

"Javi," You're a panting mess just by his fingertips lightly brushing over your body.

"So needy, corazón." He was teasing you and having the time of his life while doing so.

"Please, I need you." The desperation in your voice almost made you want to cringe, but you couldn't help it. This man was your sole weakness and you'd be damned if you couldn't have him. He was so intoxicating. He was like a drug. Your drug.

His good looks and charming charisma are what had you wrapped around his finger... not to mention his soft side he only reserved for you. You were in love with it all, and even though he didn't know it yet, you had a strong feeling he felt the same way too.

You’re the greatest love of my life

You rested your head on Javier's bare chest as he stroked your hair lovingly. For the first time, he wanted to make love to you. He wanted to take it slower and savor you—your smell, your taste, the way your bare body felt against his—everything about you.

He was scared to admit it at first, but he knew that you'd be it for him. You're the love of his life. He never thought he'd be capable of love again after leaving his high school sweetheart at the altar, but here he is, head over heels for you and everything you are.

You made him so soft, but just for you. He wanted to take care of you, not just intimately, but support you emotionally and mentally. Hell, he could even see himself having kids with you, and that's something he was so sure of that he never wanted—until you came along.

He looked down at you in adoration, and figured this was the best time to admit his feelings for you. The fresh after-sex glow you had on your face was reserved just for him, and it made him weak in the knees.

"I love you, cariño." His voice is barely above a whisper, and if you weren't completely alert, you would've missed it.

You freeze, taking in his words carefully. This was a huge confession, especially for Javier. You completely melted into him, kissing the bare skin beneath you.

"Oh, Javi," Looking up at him with nothing but love in your eyes, you bring his lips down to yours. You kiss him softly before pulling apart, whispering against his lips, "Te amo para siempre."

He smiled softly down at you, and he knew then that he was hooked, forever.

American Jesus

[am-i-interrupting]

Lil’ Late Night Life

So, just wanna explain some things as to why I haven’t been posting as much lately. I’ve got story recommendations queued but I haven’t written or posted any original content in a hot second. Here’s why:

I am currently a full time nail student which is taking up Monday-Thursday and working part job which takes up Friday-Sunday.

School doesn’t take up near as much energy as work does but I have a lot of things I need to do at home and I have to do them on those days or they simply won’t get done. Then on work days all my energy is gone.

Just to get a little ranty for a second. I work in a very Christian store. I never wanted to work here but they were the only place that responded to my application. I am looking for a new job right now because I get paid $8 an hour and total about $540 a month which is $100 short for my school payments so I’ve been stressed about that but also the place is very cliquey and because I don’t fit into any of those cliques, I am the one who gets ostracized more often than not so that sucks and the management is shit. Then there’s the costumers who are all older Christians who tell me to smile more and I’m just one fucking wrong look away from getting arrested.

Long story short, I’m stressed as fuck and feeling pretty lonely and unappreciated. Everyone there is really just not for me and they take up all my energy to the point where when I come home, I just go to bed. I don’t do anything else, just go to bed.

So, I hate asking for things but if anyone has any money to spare and would like to, I’d really appreciate it if you would tip me or buy something from my studio wish list I’d truly appreciate it. Or, hey, if you’re in the south and want your nails or toes done shoot me a message of what state your in and we can chat about it.

Anyway, sorry that I haven’t been posting much but life is a lot right now. It’s really mostly my job, honestly. I think once I get a new one I’ll be back to posting. Maybe you’ll get something before I graduate in September. Fingers crossed. I hope so. I miss writing, I just don’t have the energy to spare right now.

Love and kiss!

[jencsi]

1-25 for Finn because you deserve to gush about your favourite. Take as long as you want, or if you don't wanna do all of them then just answer the ones you want to.

*Disclaimer*- I had an absolute blast doing this and yes I know I could have written about all of these without waiting for someone else to ask, but it's much more fun and motivating when someone else thinks of you. :) So thank you. This is a long one. But so worth it.

1. Why do you like or dislike this character?- I like Finn because she reminds me of myself in some ways but in other ways she is the person I wish I could be/the friend I wish I had. She tries to be the best version of herself everyday, even when she might fail. She pushes through even when things do fail because what can you do? She is stronger than me, tougher than me, smarter than me, things I wish I was. She forces herself into the world and makes people pay attention to her but I feel like I am always picked last or not picked at all. She emulates so many qualities that get her into trouble but somehow it all works out for the best. I give up much too easily on things when they don’t go my way. She knows she deserves to be respected and treated where often times I just take BS from people and let it consume me instead of fighting for what I want. She forces others to deal with her instead of being silent. She makes sure she is heard. She also was a good friend to Sara and Morgan and helped Sara grow as a person and be separate from Grissom because Sara is a separate person who deserves happiness even if it wasn’t with him and Finn sort of showed her that its okay to want love but want what you deserve and not wait around for someone else to make the decision. I dislike her because sometimes there were moments where she probably shouldn’t have kept pushing and maybe held her tongue and just let things go but she didn’t and it's more of a second hand embarrassment feeling when she pushes to far but that’s really the only dislike I have for her. 

2. Favorite canon thing about this character?- Desk sitting. Getting into trouble. Getting Russell angry with her only to have him actually care deeply for her. The Jules nickname she hates allegedly but lets him call her that anyways. Sports. Violence. Blood spatter. Having multiple love interests in just a few short seasons. 

3. Least favorite canon thing about this character?- um dying? Lol yeah we know what the OG script said but the final nail in the coffin literally and metaphorically is that she died. 

4. If you could put this character in any other media, be it a book, a movie, anything, what would you put them in?- I think it would be neat to see Finn in a Harry Potter type setting. Mostly because I grew up reading those books and low key she’d make an excellent Ravenclaw or Slytherin. I would also like to see her in the Kinsey Millhone series which was written by Sue Grafton and was a private detective novel series featuring titles like A is for Alibi, B is for Burglar, etc. Kinsey was a great character and since the author died, she made it a legality so none of her work can be made into movies or series but it would be cool to see Finn in that world and the world of Temperance Brennan (book version) by Kathy Reichs. 

5. What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them?- Brighter Than The Sun by Colbie Caillat because I heard this song on the radio shortly after Finn’s first episode aired and then the team baseball episode aired and I felt that she just radiated during those scenes and it just stuck. I have an entire Finn playlist but this one is the first one I had on there in 2012. 

6. What's something you have in common with this character?- we are both underdogs. CC- Under A Cloud. Finn was not everyone's favorite in the fan group and I understand that and relate to that personally. I’m never a first choice, I’m always left out of so many things, and I have very few positive life experiences because of this. The show didn’t really project these feelings about her onto me, but it was negative fandom experience over the course of 2012-2015. The experiences I have now with fandom are much better but those early moments will always resonate with me. So much unnecessary hate and disregard for no reason. 

7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like?- Seeing as I am always shocked to find a fan who likes her, I guess the simplicity of someone saying “Hey Finn is/was cool” is something I like from the fandom. 

8. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you despise?- *see number 6* Also, on a deeper level, hating Finn because she seemed too much like Catherine or came to replace her is odd when society is always screaming about how we should be lifting women up, putting them all on the same level, not pitting them against each other. You can’t share a quote to me about women supporting women then go and slander one female character just because she took a job opening that someone else just vacated. If we did that in real life, we wouldn’t have jobs. Things like that happen so much in workplace settings. Catherine wanted out. Finn wanted in. It’s a simple thing but got blown way out of proportion by some in the fandom. 

9. Could you be roommates with this character?- unfortunately no. I am too rigid in my routine and organizing and Finn is pure chaos. She's loud. I’m quiet. I’m up early, she's a late sleeper. Just polar opposites. 

10. Could you be best friends with this character?- probably. I would love to have someone like this in my life, someone fun and bright and bubbly who would not forget about me or leave me out of group activities or forget I exist. 

11. Would you date this character?- Yes! She’s fun and silly and full of zest for life and has such a big heart and clearly wants to love and be loved. I would adore this in real life. 

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?- that she didn’t die. Along with so many others- she originally wanted to be a doctor like her father, she's an only child, her first husband was a cop who was killed on the job and that spiraled her into pursuing police work, he was killed the same night he proposed to her so therefore she wasn’t officially married but she refers to him as a first husband, his case was never solved. She was adopted and raised by her uncle (biological moms brother) and aunt but doesn’t discover it until the Gig Harbor Killer reveals it. She always felt a stronger bond with her father growing up vs her mother and now this all makes sense to her but she never felt unloved. Both her adoptive family have passed on and she has to dig for clues and piece together her life. Her biological mother finds her and has been keeping tabs on her for 50 years but was terrified to reveal the secret since she was only 16 when she gave birth to her and why she gave Finn to her brother and his wife when she was a baby, they could raise her in a more stable environment. 

13. What's an emoji, an emoticon and/or any symbol that reminds you of this character or you think the character would use a lot?- heart eyes, hearts in general, the sun, sunflowers, stars, anything bright and flashy remind me of her. Things she would use alot- the silly face emojis, winking face ones, the sports ones. 

14. Assign a fashion aesthetic to this character.- I would say she is casual when she’s not working, jeans, t-shirts, hoodies, athletic wear. At work, business casual I suppose, she always had leather jackets and sleeveless shirts/blouses. Wish they would have had more opportunities for her to dress up and do undercover assignments and explore being different that way as well. 

15. What's your favorite ship for this character? (Doesn't matter if it's canon or not.)- Finn and Nick send me into another dimension. They both understood the job well, both could relate to each others pains, could fully support each other in a difficult time. I feel like Finn and her lightness would lift Nick out of his darkness (not that people are supposed to save each other in a relationship) but more of helping him be the best version of himself that he could be, not weighed down by his past, he could see her as a light at the end of the tunnel. He could help her relax a bit more and not be so wound up about cases and injustices. Not that she needed to be reeled in but he would give her a reason to stop and think of the consequences of her reckless actions if she had a reason to care about not getting hurt, maybe she would stop. 

16. What's your least favorite ship for this character?- I honestly can’t think of any. Finn gets along with everyone. She bonded well with Greg and had a good time teasing and poking fun at Hodges. 

17. What's a ship for this character you don't hate but it's not your favorite that you're fine with?- I guess Finn with all the random suitors they gave her. Like her Seattle ex Mike, I don’t hate it, but we knew it wasn’t going to be more than one episode's worth of backstory for her and him. Her thing with Shaw wasn’t great either seeing as he led to her death as well as his own but lowkey at least she had some romance before her demise. Moreno wasn’t awful but his partner was a dirty cop who beat the crap out of her in Karma To Burn so that would make things awkward. Finn is shippable with pretty much everyone. 

18. How about a relationship they have in canon with another character that you admire?- The dynamic she has with Russell is beautiful. Not even being over dramatic either, what they have is poetic, magic, understanding on a level so deep, respect, care, admiration, chaos. Something so profound and resonating that I can’t even describe it properly but also could write an entire essay on it just screaming about it. Is it love? Is it platonic friendship? Codependency? Mutual? None of these things and yet all of these things at the same time? Spiritual, soulful, stellar, when her lifeforce is drained so is his, when she hurts, he hurts, it's just so *chefs kiss* magnificent. 

19. How about a relationship they have in canon that you don't like?- Nothing that I can think of honestly. Finn didn’t get much of a chance to develop as a character before the show ended. She pretty much vibes well with everyone. 

20. Which other character is the ideal best friend for this character, the amount of screentime they share doesn't matter?- Finn seemed to have alot in common with Henry during season 12, teaching him baseball for the game, talking about fantasy novels, but she also connected well with Morgan and Sara. I think out of all of them, she needed a good girl best friend like Morgan. Morgan seemed more down with the fun and chaos Finn caused and they could laugh and be silly and make jokes and just hang out like normal friends and drink and sing karaoke and just go crazy. 

21. If you're a fic writer and have written for this character, what's your favorite thing to do when you're writing for this character? What's something you don't like?- my favorite thing to do for fics for Finn is let her be loved. Soft affections and comforts and just giving her as much love as I can pour into a fic is my main goal. I do like getting her into trouble and the subsequent “talking to” she gets from Russell. I can’t think of anything I don’t like in writing for her besides not having ideas, going through a dry spell of having zero ideas for her, that’s torture. 

22. If you're a fic reader, what's something you like in fics when it comes to this character? Something you don't like?- I love when people post fics about Finn because they are hard to find in the fandom. I don’t think I have read a Finn fic by another author that I didn’t like. Anyone who makes an effort to expand on a character in a creative setting is top tier, there are no bad fics in my mind.  23. Favorite picture of this character?- Oh man, just one? This is tough. Quite literally any screen shot from her first episode will do.

24. What other character from another fandom of yours that reminds you of them?- Ellie Bishop from NCIS sat on desks for a while and had a very spunky personality. Chris Connor from Becker (also stars Ted Danson) had a similar positive optimistic attitude as Finn (plus curls for days) and her scenes with Becker remind me so much of Russell and Finn but in a late 90’s-early 2000’s comedy setting, it's hilarious if anyone stumbles upon it. 

25. What was your first impression of this character? How about now?- First impression was shock because I was going into the rest of season 12 knowing Catherines loss would be prevalent and I wasn’t sure what Finn would be like. First episode with Finn had me hooked. The energy she brought, the playful banter, the anger issues, the back story with Russell, just all of it grabbed me and sucked me in and I felt this strong emotional pull to her after Seeing Red. She even walked with a spring in her step and there was something about that little quirk in just one episode that drew me in to wanting to see more and know more. And as a byproduct of that, I absolutely adore Elisabeth Shue. She made Finn so real and brought so many layers to her. Everything I’ve said about Finn in these 25 questions come from Elisabeth bringing her to life. I would have none of that if anyone else had been cast to be part of the show at that exact moment. Like how lucky did I get? Thank goodness she said yes to it or the casting people picked her or however the process went down. I can’t imagine anyone else as Julie Finlay. I will always carry this character with me (as I have since 2012) as like a little sidekick, a little voice that tells me I can do something, I’ll make it, I’ll keep going for some crazy unknown reason. Finn was Russell’s voice inside his head that guided him that he became dependent on overtime and she’s mine too.

26. FREEBIE QUESTION!!- What hopes did you have for this character?- Back in 2015 when Finn’s fate was left in limbo, of course I was hopeful for her survival. As time went on and the show was officially canceled, I was still left in limbo wondering how they would handle the coma. Then they announced a 2 hour movie, okay no big deal. Then it was announced that Elisabeth wouldn’t be joining that finale movie and I was devastated. Looking back on that time, I think I gained a better understanding as to why. The obvious answer would be, she was busy and couldn’t fulfill the time needed to film any potential Finn scenes. Or the decision to kill Finn was made and she didn’t want to be part of that so she dipped out, fair enough. But I hoped with all my heart and soul that her character would survive and not be tossed aside and forgotten like garbage. Oh it’s just Finn, who cares as long as we get Grissom and Sara and Catherine etc. The disregard hurt as a long time fan of the show, I was torn between being excited for certain things but gutted because, no Finn. Overall I just hoped for respect for her, dignity, a decent conclusion to her story because it mattered too. And once again I found myself feeling as if I didn’t matter because if Finn didn’t matter, then how could I ever expect anyone to think I mattered? That sinking underdog kicked in the gut feeling was too visceral and I don’t think I will ever accept what we got in the end for Finn. She deserved the love she gave, it was greater than most realized.

[gimmethatagustd]

So I'm the one who did an ask about Paint Me Naked. You know earlier I have this public speaking that it'll last for about 40 minutes, based on how long I've made it. Just so you know, I'm a nervous freak who is just tryna act tough in front of people, but today I just wanna vomit and ditch the place. Because I'm afraid really, of being judged, or just being looked at. 😭 I barely slept and ate on the way here because I just can't. Then I opened Tumblr, and I stumbled upon my following list and found your blog and looked for a fic to read while waiting because hearing the emcee talk just gave me a stomachache. And then I read Paint Me Naked. And... I felt really better, inspired even, with him JK not caring what other people would say. Long story short, for me, I nailed my speech. It's a bit cringeworthy for how I am shaky at first, but who cares? This is for my experience. Let myself bathe the moment and savour it. And now I'm walking home, just had an ice cream because I feel like I deserved it. Prolly get a whole tub when I reached another seven eleven on the way, and cry in bed later, not because I could've done my speech better if I wasn't nervous, but because I did it. Maybe Paint Me Naked JK would be proud, HAHA.

Ps. Wish you guys were here. Let's eat ice cream.

omg, congrats anon !! 40 minutes is a LONG TIME to do public speaking. i have social anxiety, so i also hate public speaking. i don't think it's cringe to feel all the things you were feeling at all. i've almost passed out from public speaking LOL so you're totally valid

it's sweet that paint me naked could be a source of comfort and inspiration for you. honestly, this is why i love writing. it makes me happy to know that my story could give you something meaningful!! even if it's just a dumb little story

i hope you enjoy your ice cream 🥹 it's well-deserved !! look at you go !! paint me naked JK would be SO proud of you 🥹 he'd tell you that you're killing it

[hebezunet]

also, since i am... 100% certain that the chip twitters aren't coming back, i wanna take a few minutes to talk about my experience as a mod for one of the characters (since i doubt it's any surprise that I was one lol)

firstly, i'm not revealing anybodys identities here other than my own, because everyone has fully moved on from the project and don't wanna be assocciated in any way with it anymore. i'm making this post mostly for myself and maybe 2 other people so even if you have inklings of who the other mods are, don't look for them. they will not be happy

with that out of the way-

if it wasn't supremely god damn obvious by this point, i was the most recent mod for bert. from like... what, may 2020? that whole big arc where he got out of the bertputer, that's when i started. definitely a lot of weight on my shoulders with that one.

despite how much i had fun writing for bert though... this whole project was really a nightmare from beginning to end behind the scenes. before we (the new team) could even start actually posting and writing stuff, there was a whole kerfuffle getting the keys (account log in info) from the old team. had to even get david involved for a few things, which we really hated doing just cuz we didn't like bothering him. the old team was also... well, its own thing. i've kinda blocked out most of what happened regarding that but what i do know was that it was very mentally taxing trying to get rid of the old guys and get us logged into the new accounts.

people also certainly had... mixed feelings about the direction we tried to take things in. we were handed a story that was already extremely jacked up with its own weird baggage attached and had to make do with what we could. the story beats set up by the previous team were really hard to work with and we genuinely just did not agree with some of the characterization that was happening. namely bert and otto, they were... something. so, we tried our best to work with it and find justifications or explainations for certain behaviors and actions. i do know for a fact that there were people that did not like what we did with bert, especially. remember seeing stuff saying that we 'aged up' bert for the sole purpose of shipping him with rotten which... is not at all what happened. he was already a grown up character, in his late teens or early 20s, but the previous team had infantilized him to such a degree and for so long that that was just what people knew. we ended up justifying this by basically diagnosing bert with trauma induced age regression. it's a little complicated and a little fuzzy to recall, but that's the intention we were going with, at least.

we did originally have bigger plans for these characters and their arcs and everything, but the team was losing interest and everything surrounding it was genuinely sending some of us into mental crisis. it made us all distance ourselves really far from the project and not wanting to touch chipspeech as a whole with a 10 ft pole. a lot of this stemmed from the sovereign station server too, it was fine like 80% of the time, but shit got weird in there. if you weren't in there then like, good. you've saved yourself the headache. but overall, pretty much everyone has moved on and is doing their own thing now. there's been a few mods that I don't talk to anymore due to other circumstances, but I'm still good friends with a handful of them. they're doing much better now, too.

long story short, the characters just... aren't gonna be coming back, as far as I can tell. it's been pretty obvious due to the 2+ years of radio silence, but just to put the nail in the coffin. i still believe that the twitters are a great springboard for your own interpretations, and that's kind of another reason why we stopped. these characters can honestly be whatever the hell you want them to be. making a rigid sort of canon to apply to them is a little silly, especially when it's a bunch of young adults roleplaying that canon on twitter dot com. do whatever you want. it was a fun enough ride while it lasted.

that being said though, i personally still hold chip near and dear to me. strong interest has definitely faded, but i still like making covers occasionally and drawing the guys and silly stuff like that. i have a lot of myself to thank for chipspeech, and that's not changing, despite the horrors that we faced. thanks for reading all this if you did lol.

and bert is best boy im DYING ON THIS HILL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[scary-monsters]

Diego Brando

Coming from dm!!! I wanna hear some Diego headcanons, could you tell us?

OF COURSE, THANK YOU 🤸‍♀️ im eating up every opportunity to talk about this man !!! some of these i've probably mentioned before but i have a few core HCs that i am quite passionate about so that's inevitable :'))

(warning for SBR spoilers!)

he's 5'3", i think this is widely accepted but i want to emphasize my love for short king diego

he has freckles, yes this is my tendency to give every single one of my favorite characters freckles but i won't back down on this

he's very particular about aesthetics, including but not limited to his clothing, his living space, the way he physically carries himself, the state of silver bullet's appearance (though he is very passionate about caring for her in general and considers it his way of bonding with her)

he's VERY good at braiding hair and can do several different kinds with ease and quickness.

morning guy, he likes being up to see the sunrise and get in some early morning exercise

modern diego is a huge movie buff, his favorite films are peak and you cannot convince him otherwise! he loves psychological thrillers, is very particular about the horror he enjoys, can't stand romantic comedies, and his secret guilty pleasure is animated movies about animals (spirit is very special to him)

modern diego watches hours of animal videos, if he's smiling at his phone it's very safe to assume he's watching something like "cat bonds with lizard" or "newborn foal walks for the first time"

annoyingly photogenic, he cannot take a bad picture no matter how hard someone tries to catch him off guard, however if you get a chance to take one while he's sleeping... that's when he looks the worst (he will not rest until you delete that photo)

when he's in love (rare!!!) or has decided to trust someone (also rare!!!) he gets soooo clingy and overly protective, he will do anything for the people he cares about, though gaining that trust is an extremely difficult and unbearable feat.. he's hard to love initially (and actively repellent to it anyway) but when his walls finally come down it's very much worth it

dinopants REAL, that's it that's the headcanon but araki told me himself that they're in love and compliment each other so well and make each other better people

modern diego loves jaffa cakes, they remind him of his mother because they would share them when he was very young

not the best cook but he really wants to be, his mother left behind a recipe book which he treasures dearly and wants to master.

he has a very loud laugh, it's actually a little off-putting 💀

if you don't laugh at his jokes then you're wrong and he will hold a grudge (im mostly joking but like... he thinks he's the funniest motherfucker around)

he's happiest when it's clear skies with lots of sunshine, he hates the cold, hates the rain, and despises snow, during the winter if he has to leave the house, even if it's just to get the mail or something, he wears several layers and bitches about it the entire time

scary monsters has long-lasting side effects on diego's body outside of him actively using it - his skin gets very dry much quicker (if he doesn't moisturize often his skin will peel and turn a gross green color), his nails grow exponentially faster and have to be trimmed often, he's much more sensitive to the cold, he can see perfectly fine at night without any light (his elevated senses are a canon thing anyway, i just think it's cute)

silver bullet is diego's bff !!!!!! he raised her from the time she was born and he cares deeply for her (when he called her his 'beloved' in canon i genuinely lost it) people have wronged him his entire life but horses have been his safe place for as long as he can remember

the bow on diego's helmet was placed there in dedication to his mother - the bows on his shirt when he was a child were hand-crafted by her in her (rare) free time and he's always associated these kinds of decorations with her

during the race diego finds solace in keeping his helmet close by him at all times, during quiet moments where he's alone he will have quiet conversations with it as if his mother is sitting there with him (it keeps him motivated)

diego genuinely cared for his late wife - he lacked a proper education while growing up, and while he did get some informal education during his time with the joestars, she spent a lot of time teaching him academics more relevant to his age, all while treating him with a kind of nurturing love that he'd been unknowingly craving and desperately in need of

despite this, he still has huge difficulty with vulnerability and emotional awareness in general (canon??) and has stuffed his inner struggles so deep down that he's not even aware of them anymore, his ego is definitely a coping mechanism for how troubled he actually is

but to end on a positive note: he has a youthful soul and at his best he's goofy and charismatic, he matures wonderfully and he makes an amazing mayor because he understands the struggles of the lower class and wants to work as hard for them as he can

i have to stop there or else i'll be here all day !!!!! a lot of the canon-related ones are/will be fleshed out in my current diego character study that i'm working on... god i love him he's so layered and interesting!!! and hot too!!!

[jb-nonsense]

wait but I wanna know why Theron's your least favorite :D explanation? (positive connotation i prommy)

Well it all started as a journey. It's a long journey, for sure, of a varying opinion change over the years of playing the game, from forces inside the game and outside the game. But I am not one to post things negatively about other people's favs out in the open so readmore it is

So we begin this journey as a wide eyed newbie player just figuring out what I wanted my legacy to be with my first knight, Leeloa. A friend was playing along with me, and I really enjoyed the Doc romance because I am definitely a fan of the 'player gets played by his own game and catches feelings' trope. Well, I get to SOR and mention to friend that I think Theron's fun and she tells me to ditch Doc because she didn't like him and thought Leeloa could do better.

I ended up remaking Leeloa because I listened then did not like that course, because it just didn't fit Leeloa. So honestly, I did like him when I first started.

But then writing happens, and it felt like he...Never developed past the whole "reckless, I do things when I do them" kind of persona, especially with the betrayal. And the more I delved into information on SWTOR, it just...Bothered me. He's descended from the hero of the original games, but oh no not force sensitive, but he's a great spy so amazing.

Why?? Because he had some Jedi training because it was expected for him to be force sensitive but oh no he WASN'T what a shock...

Except that...Doesn't really track with the Jedi and, everyone hates me, but the test for the midichlorians. They would know, they wouldn't just assume because his mom was Satele.

And somehow, despite acting in the most unspy like ways, he's a great spy. I don't know why anyone would have the Grand Master of the Jedi Council's son as a spy because that is just a huge liability.

I'll admit I haven't read the extra material because I just think it's...Kind of silly to have content outside of a video game beyond, say, a short story or a short comic.

There's just a lot of his story that if you look at it closer and in the grand scheme of Star Wars, is just absolutely ridiculous and maybe, a bit more Gary Stu than Luke.

Now then, to the writing and how he was treated in expacs. (This area is a place where Lana is also on thin fuckin ice.) The absolute favoritism shown to him by the devs drove me crazy. It started to weed away at my liking him and move me more into the exasperated/tired/neutral about him. You have this whole giant alliance, but the focus being on him and Lana so much was just annoying, especially considering it was Koth who helped the Outlander escape in the beginning chapters and how he got pushed aside. It didn't narratively feel...Cohesive and just a 'Look at the Sh*n kid go!'

The nail in the coffin is how the fandom acts about how he's a golden boy, how he gets fawned over, and honestly?? I just hate liking those characters for personal reasons. It always seems like people ignore what we're given about the character and expanding on it and, instead, ignore it and write an entirely different personality with the face they think is cute. I am huge on consistency, it's my style of writing, my preferred style of reading (thanks literary analysis class in college you ruined me), so fandom just fucked me over from liking him and while he's still friends with my knight, I try my hardest to ignore fandom with him, do my best to try to enjoy him, because I do intend to run all the game romances for gif making purposes.

Also he's really written as playersexual if you play a light side character and some conversations felt awkward like the devs were expecting you to have romanced him.

[420pogpills]

to celebrate this monumental day in our community, i am going to post the dream team meetup + drace reveal excerpts from my dnf fic 'together' because let's face it i am most probably never going to finish this fic so if you wanna read the parts, they are below under the 'keep reading' 😁

no beta we die like george in manhunt (there's probably going to be so many typos and grammatical mistakes i genuinely haven't read this back or edited it in like a month soz but hope you enjoy anyway)

the fic is called 'together' (title from by together - gjan)

They’re not boyfriends. 

At least not on paper – arriving at that label would require communication, and would George be George if he didn’t bend over backwards to try and avoid every single situation that required him to speak about his feelings? 

Dream wouldn’t change him for the World. 

He worried, in the beginning, that things would change. That actually meeting George in real life would shift their dynamic into something that neither boys were able to recover from. 

Up until George moved in, their relationship had remained genuinely platonic (or, as platonic as doing an ‘am I in love with my best friend?’ quiz whilst on call with said best friend could be) and Dream won’t deny that feelings were involved long ago – definitely from his end at least – but there was almost like an unspoken line in place that neither of them tried to cross. 

Perhaps because they knew that finally meeting face to face was the one final test left to verify the strength of their connection, and whether anything beyond friendship was worth the risk. 

Remembering all those nights Dream laid in bed staring at the ceiling, chewing on his bottom lip until it bled or picking at the skin around his nails until it was raw, and sometimes even wiping tear after tear but they fell regardless, because at one point he was hit with a very strong realisation that what he felt towards his best friend couldn’t be described as just ‘love’. 

He hated waking up and not hearing from George within the first hour of consciousness. He can’t keep his eyes off of every freckle and strand of hair and twitch of the lips, whether it’s a picture on his timeline or a stream or a private FaceTime, he has no trouble focusing on every part of George. He remembered being a young teen, never once questioning his sexual preference towards women, but having to spit out a random excuse to mute himself the very first time George revealed his face on camera. He sure as hell did not react this way to seeing Sapnap or Bad for the first time.

He entertains his childish pranks and loud shrieks, he buys him things despite knowing full well George’s bank account was thriving. There are things that really, only George can get away with. 

Because he’s George. 

And his heart has accepted that there is simply no other explanation he’s going to get as to why he allows George to do whatever he wants in his life. He’s long since stopped caring about much else other than what makes the British boy happy.

Over time, he stopped fearing the thought of things falling apart, and started believing in his own ability to make George happy. So when he received the call mid-February, hearing the tremble in his voice, the unshed tears of pure joy, the whisper of ‘it’s been approved Dream’ – he knew then and there that his love for this British boy by far surpassed every single force on this planet that ever even stood a chance at taking him away from Dream. 

That was also the moment he truly started believing in soul mates. Or maybe he already did a long time ago.

The time between George’s visa getting approved and George getting off the plane in Orlando Florida was very short. ‘Finding out on a Monday afternoon and being on a plane that very Saturday’ level of short. 

Waiting is hard. And they waited long enough. 

Dream would not be coming to the airport – they had already decided a long time ago that the face reveal will be in the first official Dream Team pictures that they will collectively post on social media at the same time. They knew the chances of Dream getting recognised were very high. He may be faceless, but it will undoubtedly be easy for fans to do the math when a tall blonde man is seen with George and Sapnap in the Orlando International Airport. 

His leg was starting to feel numb from how long it had been bouncing, but there was not a single force on this earth that could contain the jitters and anticipation that was building up inside of Dream. 

He has many people that he loves and many people that he just cannot wait to finally meet. One day he will meet Bad, whom he owes so much to. He will meet Punz, and Sam, and Karl, and Tommy, and all of the people who have changed his life over the span of the last couple of years. 

Meeting Sapnap was the easiest thing in the world; Dream can’t really remember a time when the Texan boy wasn’t in his life. When he got to hug him for the first time, it felt less like a first meeting and more like a reunion. They were brothers in every form except blood. 

But George – George was different. There wasn’t really any explanation he could give, nor did he need to, because it’s clear to absolutely everyone who knew them. What he and George have was simply different. 

He knows deep in his chest that that first touch will spin his world on its axis. Many nights were spent just imagining all the different scenarios of how their dynamic will develop in person. 

Every person that has had the chance to meet George already has mentioned that he does not shy away from touch the way many people initially thought - even Sapnap expressed his shock when re-telling the events of his trip to London, that George did not push him away even once when Sapnap initiated any sort of physical affection. 

Plus, Dream has seen plenty of the vlogs and streams that George has been a part of, to know that he was in fact not like a scared stray animal that would hiss at every attempt to be touched, but instead he was a spoiled house cat who may very rarely initiate contact but did not hesitate to accept any that came his way. 

And of course Dream is excited to see it all for himself, but he’s also aware that they are different, that there is something else there that may impact their dynamic and boundaries differently to all of their other friends. He had many questions he wanted answers to.   

Will George let himself be hugged? Will he let Dream touch his hands, carry him around like a sack of potatoes, brush his hair away from his face when it gets too long? 

Likewise, will George reciprocate any of the tiny touches, will he reach out for a hug the second he lays eyes on Dream, or will he wait for a cue? What will George say, when he does finally get to observe Dream’s face?

It’s not something that he has voiced to anyone but he has found it increasingly hard to hold back the crippling self-consciousness he’s been harbouring when he realises this will be the first time George will actually, finally, see Dream’s face in person. 

There will be no filter nor screen to hide behind. Just Dream, in his full unapologetic glory. 

And while he’s excited to finally tear down every single barrier and wall between them, he couldn’t help but worry about George’s opinion. Which he knows is stupid, George loves him – maybe almost as much as Dream loves him – but he just couldn’t stop himself from hoping that when help but hope that when George finally sees his face, he will think Dream is beautiful. 

He wasn’t quite ready yet to unpack the meaning behind those thoughts.

The sound of Sapnap’s car pulling up into the driveway was sure to burn itself into Dream’s brain like a core memory. He saw stars in his vision from how fast he jumped to his feet, but he did not stumble when sprinting to the door. George was so close that Dream swears he could feel his presence. 

Suddenly, instead of the stifling Florida heat, Dream felt like he was being kissed by the most gentle rays of sunshine after spending months in the dark. 

His mind emptied itself of all thoughts, and the only word he could use to describe how he felt the first moment he made eye contact with George as he was climbing out of the car - was alive. 

Every worry and negative thought was exhaled in the same breath as the strangled gasp he couldn’t suppress when he realised George was within touching distance. Finally, finally it was Dream’s turn. 

And in the next moment he moved as fast as the breeze, only stopping when he was met in the middle by the British boy who held the other half of his soul with him for all this time. 

Enveloping George in his arms, after several years of waiting, felt like he was experiencing a kind of joy that he had never felt before yet. A kind of happiness that existed only to be felt on that very occasion, only to be felt by them. They collided with so much excitement that neither of them could fight off gravity before they collapsed into the grass, without letting go of eachother.

George was so warm - lankier than expected, but still so delicately thin, so soft and so very real. He was laughing and shaking, or maybe Dream was shaking. There was no stopping the tears that soaked into the shoulder of George’s white t-shirt, and they laid there until the fabric was almost dry again.

The first one to break the internet was actually Sapnap. 

@sapnapalt: fine i’ll say it, dnf is not dead 

It wasn’t discussed nor planned, but the captured moment was so natural and undeniably beautiful, that neither of the boys cared. That’s how the meetup was announced.

The fans were given less than a day to recover before the next meltdown.

@dreamwastaken: Told you that she was gonna love you :)  

 ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ 

Of course he was excited to face reveal, since it meant finally getting to go outside and spending time with his favourite people. That’s why it took him by so much surprise when his thumb was hovering over the ‘post’ button one second, and the next his vision went dark. 

When he came to, he was on the floor with his back pressed to George’s chest, bracketed by his legs and held tightly by his arms as the other boy repeatedly whispered ‘you’re okay’ in his ear while gently stroking his hair back. He couldn’t tell if the shaking was coming from him or George. Probably both. 

Sapnap was kneeling in front of them both with a bottle of water in his hand, his eyes blown wide with worry. 

It was a panic attack. 

All the excitement did well to mask the crippling anxiety he had pushed away to the back of his mind, at the thought of how much his life is going to change for not only him, but all of his friends and family too. The inevitable abuse and invasion of privacy that would come from the people online who feel ruthless hatred for his existence - despite him trying his best to make amends, to prove he’s a good person. 

Eventually he had to come to terms with the fact that it didn’t matter how much love he had to give - there was no way to please absolutely everyone. 

George was delirious with worry, eyes blown and glassy, fingers twitching. His face was twisted up in what was probably meant to be his typical sarcasm, but the tremor in his voice wasn’t convincing. It wasn’t Dream’s first time encountering George in this state, but it was his first time seeing it in person. 

A sour taste always forms in his mouth when he remembers the boy losing his mind after receiving a call from Sapnap about Dream being rushed to hospital earlier that year due to kidney stones. Despite not having a diagnosis yet, they scared themselves into believing the worst when Sapnap let it slip that Dream had created a note on his phone containing all his passwords. 

After finding out that George stopped eating for two days when he collapsed momentarily while in a discord call, he decided he never wanted George to feel that much worry ever again. 

(There was also a solid period of about three days where George refused to refer to him as anything other than ‘idiot’ because after the worry, came the anger.)

George would rather drink hot sauce and lemon juice than say the L word out loud, but Dream knew firsthand that he cared and loved so intensely that none of it needed to be vocalised verbally. They got each other, and their bond was special.

The panic attack took every ounce of energy he had left in him, and so he spent the rest of the night in bed. His sleepy eyes begged him to let them close, but he desperately wanted to burn this image in his head, of where instead of having George in a discord call - this time he was right beside him. 

Pale arms did their best to wrap around and hold him, soft lips almost pressing against his temple. Despite the inner turmoil of the day's events, Dream felt like the entire world had stopped and it was just him and George, finally able to hold each other close. 

A warm breath tickled his forehead, and he drifted off to a delicate voice whispering to him.

“We’re gonna be okay, you’re okay.” 

That was George’s second night in Florida. It was also the first night he slept in Dream’s bed. 

(Dream patted himself on the back for that one - he definitely thought he would have to work harder to get the British boy into his sheets and allow himself to be cuddled… He should have panic attacks more often.)

(That was a joke.) 

The face reveal was posted four days later than planned. The fans were confused, having been under the impression that it was going to go hand in hand with George’s arrival, but all questions were forgotten the second everyone finally got to familiarise themselves with the dirty blonde hair, green eyes and beaming smile of the little green blob they have spent several years loving and supporting.

When it happened, Dream was squeezed between George and Sapnap on the couch, with both boys rubbing his back and encouraging him to breathe as he stared down at his phone showing the unpublished post. 

He remembered taking a deep breath in, and pressing ‘post’ as he breathed out. His heart was racing and his fears were loud, but he knew he could overcome absolutely anything that was thrown at him, as long as he had the two people he loved the most by his side through it all. 

Dream was sure there was hate. He was used to being hated. But nothing prepared him for the overwhelming outpouring of love and support that he received, and for the first time in his life, everything negative was completely drowned out in the sea of positive. 

The instant he realised it, he burst into tears, his sobs of relief coming out in hiccups. In the end it turned into a core memory for him, because the fondness that he felt towards the fans who loved him, the friends who supported him, and the two heads pressed into each shoulder soaking his hoodie with their own tears of joy - he wasn’t sure he had ever felt quite as happy as he did in that moment. 

But as it turns out, now that George was within touching distance of all times - those moments were just the first of many. 

The entire experience had drawn the Dream team even closer together - Dream and George especially. The boy grew very accustomed to Dream’s need for touch, and he loved seeing the chaos that they were able to cause on the internet by posting pictures of them together that were blurring all platonic lines.

@GeorgeNootFound: He’s kind of obsessed with me :/

It was never going to be all smooth sailing, and Dream suffered from a few more panic attacks in the following weeks - luckily none as intense as the first one - as he had to get used to a whole new life of a lot more people knowing his business. 

He received several calls from a couple of childhood friends who had been kept in the dark about his identity. All of them were shocked he made Minecraft videos for a living. None of them were upset about the secrecy. And that made Dream smile, knowing he truly kept the best people in his life. 

Eventually the panic attacks dwindled down to little hand tremors, as his confidence grew and he got used to being in public again - the Dream Team were ready to take over the World.

to be continued~

[fyodior]

Alright bisch , im doing this

*slams my resume on your desk

K so Hi! I'm Noodles as you know by now and I go by she/they . Currently unemployed and finishing school and 18 years old.

Appearance wise I'm pretty lanky and tall(5'11) with short grey hair and blue eyes. I wear shit ton of hoodies and casual clothes that are more practical than for looks. (Side effect is I have always smth in my pockets like pens or money or gum, it's like Blackhole)

This feels weird talking about personality but hey whatever dhdh. I'm clearly an introvert but surprisingly I can thrive in social events too. I can easily talk to strangers and I would say even charm them if I put my mind to it , it just simply has a limit and after a while I fizzle out and feel like not talking. I like to give people things and help in any way, it brings me more joy than anything which translates into not handling affection well. I'm pretty chill and laid back compared to some people , I don't involve myself into dramas or issues since I prefer to watch afar. Even though I secretly might wanna punch some people who can't take the hint.(Violence is the answer sometimes kids) It's surprising how chill and unbothered I am but when shit goes down and I'm fed up I take the reigns and tell people what to do cause they're indecisive morons. It's not often but it fills me with pride when I can take the lead like this and people believe in me to be leader.

(I did the test but it's confusing a bit? If u know the other personality test I'm an INFP but thats a bit old now)

Some of my hobbies include drawing a shit ton of small doodles but never having the patience to stick with one piece too long. Piloting I would also consider a hobby , and reading and playing video games too in spare time. But lately taking walks has taken a big part in my life I have come to enjoy them too. I do bite my nails a lot unfortunately, old habit eeee

Likes and dislikes sheesh okay uh. I like people who don't lie about their feelings. Hate lies with passion. Those small white lies don't bother me but stuff like hiding your feelings and lying to another person's face whenever u like em or not makes my blood boil. I hate blueberries, lavender and coconut , Oblivious people and of course The current capitalistic system .

I like rats , snakes , birds ,cats and dogs of course . Creating anything brings me joy, whenever it be art , writing or even just ideas. My hands need to keep doing smth and creating is one way to do it. I also like winter and cold somehow , better than heat for sure

(U can go nsfw too but Its not a requirement btw heh)

(And for characters not to match with I don't think I'm comfy with mori much or nikolai sorryy)

Thank you for doing this event hon, and thank you for letting me participate , lov uuuuuuu

⚞ noodles x chuuya ⚟

⋆ ok first of all i know you dont like pink but i think its cute so suck it up

⋆ second of all. i rly wanted to be more creative and give you someone not super obvious but chuuya just works so well like that is ur man

⋆ third of all you will always be shipped with me above anyone else ok u know this

⋆ he is so fucking. gender. and sexy we discuss this often

⋆ above all else you are a fucking people pleaser even to ur own detriment dkfjdkjdf and i truly think chuuya is among the few people who wouldn't abuse this. he'd entertain you because he knows its fulfilling for you, but make sure you arent running yourself dry

⋆ he would indulge in your praise kink at every turn. not even just sexually although he def would be telling you (depending on position/situation) how sexy you look or how good you're being or how good ur fucking him

↣ in everyday life too! how much he appreciates you and how thankful he is for u. behind closed doors this man is so fucking soft no matter how steely he acts in front of others.

⋆ chuuya will so let you peg him in fact he will request this

⋆ chuuya is also not a liar (irl, probably lies his ass off to PM ppl) and really wants someone who he can trust to always be honest with him, because he def has trust issues.

⋆ he will not hide his feelings either. again he probably has a good ass poker face just bc . pm exec and all that but he will always be so straightforward because that's just how he is. you'd never have to worry about him stewing silently or secretly being pissed off

⋆ it irks him so bad how much taller you are but he tries to not let it get to him too bad dkfkdjkjfkj

⋆ "violence is sometimes the answer kids" i am 100% positive he has said that before at some point in his life

↣ he'd be a horrible enabler tho like you'd be ranting how much you want to kill a peer/coworker and he'd be like fucking do it. whats stopping you and ur like PRISON IS ??????

⋆ he's the same when it comes to avoiding unnecessary drama. he thinks it's dumb as fuck and has absolutely no interest in getting involved. but he does like shit talking with you at home fjkdfkjdfj or going on rants abt how much he fucking hates dazai and ur sitting on the couch as he paces around the room like. uh huh yes honey for sure

⋆ you'd def always be drawing or doodling sketches of him and the paper ones he'd keep all of them and store them bc he finds it so endearing

⋆ chuuya is the same exact way when it comes to an introvert that's able to be charming as fuck. like you'd be able to attend dinners or parties or whatever and charm everyone there but you leave after like an hour fkdfkdkjfdjk and then sit in silence on the couch watching tv to recharge

⋆ i dont think he'd be great about letting you be the leader/taking the reigns in situatiions honestly but you'd also completely trust him to not be a fucking idiot and trust his decisions so does it rly matter

⋆ why do you hate lavender. i love lavender. chuuya probably loves lavender

⋆ your ability to stay unbothered would be really good for him and his incredibly short (like him) temper. you'd be like the only person who could calm him down and get him to chill the fuck out literally please do this my guy is so high strung sometimes

⋆ he'd absolutely fucking obliterate your ass in any video games

⋆ power couple. can i be the third pls

⋆ IM SORRY I JUST CANT DO NSFW ABT YOU WITH ANYONE ELSE EVEN IF ITS FICTIONAL FJDJFJDF

⋆ love u

[neowinestainedress]

hiii i'm back hehehe glad it made your day cuz you deserve it since you made my day too!! 🥰

my next goals are 1) a happy fic and 2) a short fic. this made me tear up, i’m so happy you can see how much i love writing and i hope the same.

OH NOOO i forgot to write this when i wrote so long previously but hldbdldjd I REALLY ENJOYED LONG FIC SO YEAA I'M ALWAYS EXCITED WHEN I SEE WC MORE THAN 10K, pleaseee i live for it!!! but yeaa its your goals who am i to stop you, just wanna say the wc doesnt actually bother me as a reader cuz i love it. and for the emotions i dont really mind cuz i love a good fic with a lot of emotions! So as long as youre happy and satisfied with your writing thats the best a reader like me could get 🧡

it’s not a want it’s a NEED at this point (also it got nothing to do with the story but lately he’s feeding my delusion a bit too much so yeah). i might’ve written the man of my dreams in this fic… just maybe. no but it’s true that we don’t know him truly but it’s already a blessing to living at the same time. i think i came up with a good compromise between real him and obviously made up character, idk how to explain but the mix between the hopeless romantic – or loser (affectionative) – and the tease is just so haechan.

YES YES OMG I GOT IT AND I'M ALSO GLAD YOU GOT WHAT I MEAN like yesss we didnt know him much cuz lets admit it even how much we think we know a little bit of donghyuck by how the media show him, still we couldnt see it as whole and you really wrote a mix of haechan + hyuck characteristics so well. HE IS FEEDING US WITH THE DELUSIONAL WITH THE AMOUNT OF IGLIVE HE DID AND HIS BUBBLE SELCA CUZ YESS HE BE SENDING DIFFERENT VIBE OF SELCA ON IG AND BUBBLE AND IDK IF I LOVE HIM OR HATE HIM FOR THAT BUT YES WHATEVER AS LONG AS ITS LEE HAECHAN (we are down bad atp) and i could say that ever since i stan him, it's a little hard for me to read other members' fics cuz yes i could picture the scenes on my mind but i couldnt really get the feels and its probably because i didnt really catch up with others characteristics as well (or maybe cuz it's clear who do we picture the ml is)

i was unsure about her backstory for so long, because initially she wasn’t supposed to have one (not this heavy at least) but then it came to me out of nowhere and i felt it was more fitting of a reasoning for the way she behaved (especially her obsession with rules) than some tough break-ups.

tbh, I cried when its near the time fl said about her trauma cuz yea i lost someone i love too before so i definitely understand why she's doing that and i appreciate that you really think a lot into it and settle down with this because yes its more natural and convincing for her behaviour to be like that and since you've decided to how to do with haechan's. love your brain and ideas 🥺🥺

i literally wrote about a man that will never exist in real life, how do i bring him to life??

honestly there's no way for it and WE CRY TOGETHER. Like yea maybe there is, but they're probably other people soulmates naurrrr this sounds so depressing but yea not that im someone who want a real love irl too 😭😭 (nah tbh im still clueless of myself, idk if it's just me being so into haechan that i could never see other men or notㅡ but i used to have a crush few months back and i decided to confess to him so that i can move on so i think i really have issue on this but yea lets move on)

it’s a mix of mark barely being with his head on earth (they way he always tries to set mc up with anybody every time they go out when she’s sulking because she wants Haechan sends me) and mc and haechan being good at keeping it a secret (always in a corner, touches under the table, going to a place they know none of their friends will ever go)

yeaaa thats what i have on my mind too, idk for some reasons Mark really nailed this kind of characters cuz yess i could see him as the damn good looking attractive man but thw cute side of him is just hldbffjflf he is cute being clueless like that and can be frustrating too. just wanna confirm it so i can maybe sleep well after knowing how it really goes and thanks too for reassuring me that the fl and haechan really get the happy ending even after the story ends hldhfldjdld (that actually reminds me of how i always wonder of one of my questions in mind about if the characters in the story really end like you know they really disappear from the 'world' right after we reach the ending/last page of the book. the same thing as the 'and they live happily ever after' like do they still living after the story until they die or what. okay enoughㅡ)

i guess the long one? did you want haechan and the mc to get back together but at the same time you wanted to slap him for what he did?

that should be me i think HAHAHA my memory sometimes betrayed me but i do note that i have this one thing being so into detail writing til i wrote such a long essay 😆😆 yeaaa i really feel i need to give you the feedback altho i was late and taking this as the chance i could finally write to you last time.

i know it’s all fictional and those characters don’t exist but i wouldn’t have made it end that way if i didn’t know he could be a better man and keep on growing up, so you can sleep at night knowing they’re all happy.

I live to dream about fictional character to keep going. I feel like I could only love fictional character so thank you very much for writing this kind of stories, i mean you know not all characters need to be perfectly perfect from the start til the end (ALTHO HITS DIFFERENT IS!!! AND WE CHEER FOR IT) but some stories of course need characters where they are growing to be the better of themselves cuz we human is supposed to do that too.

last year i had a really bad burn out and i still have no idea how i managed to write the stories i had planned back then (and in fact i didn’t write two of one series) so i decided to don’t start anything because then i get mad at me.like i use writing as escapism and when i start a story and can’t give it an ending it reflects on me more than it should, so i’ve promised myself to don’t put too much on the plate.

awhh let me give you a hug!! 🥺🥺 nevertheless you still did well and you did thought of writing it, so the thought is what matter and we discuss it here too and i get what you really wanna write but you know sometimes even if we want to write it that way but if we feel it wont turn out like we wanted, might as well just write it short and keep it like that for the better. Cuz i do love it when writer wrote details for filler but if the filler doesnt bring the reader to somewhere it'll make it boring too. Saying this from writer side of me tho now i put a pause and resort to just being a reader for the time being. (i kinda slow-down since 2020 due personal reason and i feel like i need to do something else, tho i do hope i gain my love back for writing like i used to. maybe its a good things too like i just read now and see how writer structure their ideas and plots so yea 😊)

i’m also happy you understood the characters development because some comments drove me insane and made me doubt everything. i simply thing this ending was a clear cut, you either liked jeno or haechan and it’s obviously if she didn’t end up with who you were rooting for, you would’ve ended up disappointed. but to me this story was so much more than #teamjeno or #teamhaechan so i’m happy with my characters anyway (even tho sour!haechan you will never be like hits different!haechan)

I'm always in for a developing character in a story mostly because i'm also learning how to write again too so thanks to you too!! and yess i do read some of the feedbacks and just sigh, tho of course we know not all readers has the same preferences and all, they can be disappointed or happy, we could never know it. and as a someone who is happy with the ending, all i can say maybe if they give extra and careful look at some small details or think from other perspectives they could get what the story you tried to write. I mean of course we can't force everyone to love all of our stories, but yeaa dont worry i get what you mean and that series is really good altho yes sour!haechan could never be hitsdifferent!haechan!!

no don’t feel bad at all, i’m the chilliest person and i just love discussing about my stories but i don’t get mad when it takes more time to reply, i’m a late replier too so i can’t get mad at others.

going to expose my sign/mbti side again (before i stop my reply here for now) but yes as an infj (and pisces moon) i couldn't help feeling that way like i know you're chill with it and im someone who usually reply late to others type too, i know it's just me who think that way but yea i can't help what other people think of my action. and i feel the need to shower you with so much appreciation and love so yes i just did that hehe 💗💗💗💗 and i love you back!!! 🌻🌻

hiii! no yeah i got what you meant dw. I love writing a lot but sometimes it would be good for me to keep it shorter (around 20k it’s perfect) but I’m glad a lot of you read my things even when they are so long, it means the world to me

YES YES OMG I GOT IT AND I'M ALSO GLAD YOU GOT WHAT I MEAN like yesss we didnt know him much cuz lets admit it even how much we think we know a little bit of donghyuck by how the media show him, still we couldnt see it as whole and you really wrote a mix of haechan + hyuck characteristics so well. HE IS FEEDING US WITH THE DELUSIONAL WITH THE AMOUNT OF IGLIVE HE DID AND HIS BUBBLE SELCA CUZ YESS HE BE SENDING DIFFERENT VIBE OF SELCA ON IG AND BUBBLE AND IDK IF I LOVE HIM OR HATE HIM FOR THAT BUT YES WHATEVER AS LONG AS ITS LEE HAECHAN (we are down bad atp) and i could say that ever since i stan him, it's a little hard for me to read other members' fics cuz yes i could picture the scenes on my mind but i couldnt really get the feels and its probably because i didnt really catch up with others characteristics as well (or maybe cuz it's clear who do we picture the ml is)

His selfies lately are a menace I HATE HIM HE KNOWS WHAT HE’S DOING unfortunately I’m down bad for other members too so I can read other fics (not that rn I have a lot of time to do that tbh) but yeah, he *pun coming* hits different.

tbh, I cried when its near the time fl said about her trauma cuz yea i lost someone i love too before so i definitely understand why she's doing that and i appreciate that you really think a lot into it and settle down with this because yes its more natural and convincing for her behaviour to be like that and since you've decided to how to do with haechan's. love your brain and ideas 🥺🥺

sometimes I feel like I put too much but building a lot around characters also helps me writing more easily, if I can vividly see the characters I can write them better.

honestly there's no way for it and WE CRY TOGETHER. Like yea maybe there is, but they're probably other people soulmates naurrrr this sounds so depressing but yea not that im someone who want a real love irl too 😭😭 (nah tbh im still clueless of myself, idk if it's just me being so into haechan that i could never see other men or notㅡ but i used to have a crush few months back and i decided to confess to him so that i can move on so i think i really have issue on this but yea lets move on)

my faith in men is honestly under ground so my hopes of finding a decent man are super low but I’ve got women so I’m fine (I say when my last two women crushes broke my heart)

yeaaa thats what i have on my mind too, idk for some reasons Mark really nailed this kind of characters cuz yess i could see him as the damn good looking attractive man but thw cute side of him is just hldbffjflf he is cute being clueless like that and can be frustrating too. just wanna confirm it so i can maybe sleep well after knowing how it really goes and thanks too for reassuring me that the fl and haechan really get the happy ending even after the story ends hldhfldjdld (that actually reminds me of how i always wonder of one of my questions in mind about if the characters in the story really end like you know they really disappear from the 'world' right after we reach the ending/last page of the book. the same thing as the 'and they live happily ever after' like do they still living after the story until they die or what. okay enoughㅡ)

mark’s cluelessly is my favorite part about him. I do the same, it sadden me so much to know I will never read about characters ever again, like all I have about them is what’s written in their stories and then ??? what comes after??? What will they do??? It happens with ff, books, movies, I wish some stories would never end

that should be me i think HAHAHA my memory sometimes betrayed me but i do note that i have this one thing being so into detail writing til i wrote such a long essay 😆😆 yeaaa i really feel i need to give you the feedback altho i was late and taking this as the chance i could finally write to you last time.

I mean you’re talking to someone that’s not able to keep anything short so I can’t tell you anything about the long comments hahah also I love these types of long feedback so they’re fine by me

I live to dream about fictional character to keep going. I feel like I could only love fictional character so thank you very much for writing this kind of stories, i mean you know not all characters need to be perfectly perfect from the start til the end (ALTHO HITS DIFFERENT IS!!! AND WE CHEER FOR IT) but some stories of course need characters where they are growing to be the better of themselves cuz we human is supposed to do that too.

No exactly like it’s fiction, nothing of this exists and I think people should be allowed to love CHARACTERS (made up, not real, ink on paper) even if they’re problematic or not perfect in every single way. Also extremely perfect characters are boring so… give me characters with flaws and depths and growth

awhh let me give you a hug!! 🥺🥺 nevertheless you still did well and you did thought of writing it, so the thought is what matter and we discuss it here too and i get what you really wanna write but you know sometimes even if we want to write it that way but if we feel it wont turn out like we wanted, might as well just write it short and keep it like that for the better. Cuz i do love it when writer wrote details for filler but if the filler doesnt bring the reader to somewhere it'll make it boring too. Saying this from writer side of me tho now i put a pause and resort to just being a reader for the time being. (i kinda slow-down since 2020 due personal reason and i feel like i need to do something else, tho i do hope i gain my love back for writing like i used to. maybe its a good things too like i just read now and see how writer structure their ideas and plots so yea 😊)

no yeah absolutely, with the jeno part I would have something to say for sure because there are some dynamics to explore but idk I’ll see if I ever feel like it. Also I agree because sometimes I get asked for sequels but there’s really nothing to say so I’m glad people would like to read more but I don’t think they get (if they never wrote) that plot and dynamics don’t come out of nowhere, also not everything needs a sequel. reading always helps to write so I really hope it brings your passion back, even if you have to take small steps, if it made you feel good I hope you can start again.

I'm always in for a developing character in a story mostly because i'm also learning how to write again too so thanks to you too!! and yess i do read some of the feedbacks and just sigh, tho of course we know not all readers has the same preferences and all, they can be disappointed or happy, we could never know it. and as a someone who is happy with the ending, all i can say maybe if they give extra and careful look at some small details or think from other perspectives they could get what the story you tried to write. I mean of course we can't force everyone to love all of our stories, but yeaa dont worry i get what you mean and that series is really good altho yes sour!haechan could never be hitsdifferent!haechan!!

THIS!!! and exactly not everyone can have the same preferences and that’s normal I only was sad for a few feedbacks because I genuinely couldn’t get their point (and it was about the fl not even about jeno or haechan) but at the end of the day I don’t go crazy over any of this, I’m here to talk about anything, positive and negative as long as people are polite, so if anyone wants to say why they didn’t like something I can offer my point of view as the writer, then I’m not a professional and I don’t get paid for this and I think people here tend to forget this too often (but not only for me, for every writer on this site) we don’t owe reader anything and even if I want to write something problematic all you have to do is skip it.

going to expose my sign/mbti side again (before i stop my reply here for now) but yes as an infj (and pisces moon) i couldn't help feeling that way like i know you're chill with it and im someone who usually reply late to others type too, i know it's just me who think that way but yea i can't help what other people think of my action. and i feel the need to shower you with so much appreciation and love so yes i just did that hehe 💗💗💗💗 and i love you back!!! 🌻🌻

INFX GANG LET’S GO I’m infp and pisces sun and I don’t usually like stereotypes but I perfectly fit into these lol. No I worry too much about what people think of my actions too but I also want people to know I’ll never judge them for anything, especially something so silly as a late reply. Thank you again for this talk, love you!!! 🌻

[mysticmunson]

Late Bloomer

eddie munson x reader

prompt: eddie befriends a cheerleader who’s a bit of a ‘late bloomer’ part one, part two, part three

warnings: cussing, smut, virginity (minors go away)

word count: 4k

Late Bloomer.

That’s what the other girls in your cheer squad said about your romantic life, “Oh don’t worry about it babe, it’ll happen eventually, you’re just a late bloomer.” It drove you insane that no matter how strongly you yearned for a boyfriend, it never happened. You found almost all the men in Hawkins gross, not in a mean way, but if they ever advanced on you, you shied away. You hated that you couldn’t just swallow your insecurity and pounce on one of the annoying football players, desperate for a fairytale where they married their high school sweetheart who was a cheerleader. What added to the sting is you were older than them, already 19 in senior year due to being held back a grade in elementary school for not grasping reading. This was a common fact as it seemed everyone knew everyone's business in this town, another reason to not want to sleep with the first guy available.

It all came to a tipping point at the annual cheer sleepover, held every year at the head cheerleaders house, the night before the first game of the season. It started innocently enough, all the things you’d imagine cheerleaders did during a night in. Facials, eating popcorn, painting nails, and then someone had to open their damn mouth. “So someone over here had a fling with Joeee.” Penelope sang, pointing her thumb at Rachel who began blushing profusely as the other girls gasped, including yourself. Joe was the ‘hottest’ guy in school, being athletic, kind, and rich, he was bound to get with someone from the squad, but not Rachel. She was beautiful, so it shouldn’t have been a shock, but what you did know was something slightly more selfish, she was the only other virgin on the varsity team.

“Get outta here! Did you go to his house?” Chrissy, the head cheerleader, whispered as Rachel nodded followed by not subtle shrieking. What really caused the blow up was when she pulled her oversized t-shirt up to her lower bust, exposing her stomach of hickies. “I told him not on my neck because of the game, so he got creative.” Rachel smiled, letting her shirt fall down as the girls pestered her about the details, making sure she used protection, and if it was official. You hated that this made you jealous, but you couldn’t help it, especially when a comment was made about how “It was about time you got laid! Took you long enough.” Penelope’s eyes flickered to you, indicating she was the one who let the sharp words tumble out, “Shit, I’m sorry, I totally forgot-” But you cut her off, “Hey! It’s okay, I’m a late bloomer, that’s all.” You wanted to punch yourself in the face. A gentle hand touched your thigh when the attention left you, glancing at Anne, the quietest girl in the room.

“I have to run an errand, wanna come?” She asked, standing to grab her varsity sweater as you followed, knowing you needed fresh air. Both of you slipped out with not much protest as they felt bad at unintentionally singling you out, which you knew the girls meant well and that they weren’t the vicious stereotype they were painted to be. You walked down the street in silence, making your way through a field as a shortcut. “Do you smoke?” Anne broke your daze, looking up at her face that only glanced briefly at yours before looking to where they were heading.

“Sometimes, more socially. Also where are we going?” You asked as you made your way into the forest behind your school, the breeze becoming more steady, reminding you that you only wore shorts and a sweater. With chills coming up your spine and before Anne could say where they were going, a voice boomed to your side.

“If it isn’t my favorite client.”

Eddie Munson sat on the edge of the wooden picnic table in the center of the woods, black pail in hand with a cigarette in the other. Anne waved, approaching him as you froze in place. You had nothing against Eddie, only having classes with him occasionally where you mainly kept to yourself. Being at a drug deal was pretty risque for a cheerleader, especially the night before the first game of the season, except you weren’t a snitch.

“I don’t bite, sweetheart.” He said, making you laugh as you approached them, finding a seat at the picnic table. Anne was already working on rolling a joint, shockingly good at it before sealing it. She placed it between her lips, fishing her lighter out of her shorts pocket and lighting it, smoke flooding out. “Damn Anne, you’ve done this before, huh?” You smiled as she laughed, even Eddie butted in, “Yeah, she's seen me more than once.”

The three of you passed around the dope, becoming more relaxed than you had felt in months. Eddie asked what you two were up to tonight, Anne, stoned out of her mind, had words that didn’t slow due to her sublime state, “Cheerleader sleepover, this one got embarrassed for being the only one to not do the devil's tango-” “Anne!” You shrieked, covering your face as she realized her words, “Oh my God, I didn’t mean to say that, ignore what you just heard, Munson.”

Eddie, always the charmer, looked around at the vast dark space of the woods, “What do you hear something?” He stated, tumbling to an upward position as he looked through the bushes, shuffling through the brown and green leaves. Giggles abrupt from your lips, feeling less embarrassed about the ordeal, taking the final hit of the shared joint and putting it out. He jumped around various plants before sauntering over to you both, sitting on the opposing bench, “Now that the coast is clear, how much are you buying, sweetheart?”

While the name wasn’t directed at you, the title made you blush with Anne casually stating how much she’d need to make it through another exam week. You watched as his ring clad fingers fumbled with the bud, looking at the various baggies with small weights written on them. You knew he played guitar, having heard his band play at a few bars in town and he was a talented guitarist. You could almost hear the song he covered playing in the background of your mind. Once the transaction was finished, he realized you two were walking back, “Do you guys want a ride back? It’s pretty dark? I can even drop you off down the street so they don’t see my van” You thanked him, following Anne into his car that smelled even stronger of hemp than the actual drug did. Anne began going off about how she didn’t want to go back to the sleepover since the other girls were probably in bed right now, “It’s so stupid that they do this every year and go to sleep by 10:30! I get not doing an all-nighter, we don't need anyone falling during the pyramid, but still! Can you just drop me off at home? I’ll just say I didn’t feel well.”

As her complaints persisted from the front seat, you noticed Eddie’s eyes occasionally flickering to yours in the mirror, thinking it was just in your head until he winked at you. You focused your attention on the landscape outside, realizing you were on Anne’s quiet street and that he had actually been listening to her thoroughly. She said a quick thank you, leaning to the backseat to do a mutual cheek kiss before walking down the dim lit road.

“Alright, so where to?” He asked, tapping his fingers mindlessly to the beat of the song quietly playing from the radio. “Thanks for the ride, I can walk from here.” But this just made him turn in his chair, eyebrow raised, “I mean, call me a gentleman, but I don’t feel great making a girl walk home by herself in the middle of the night. Hop in the front.” For some reason, you obeyed, exiting the back to the front, telling him your address that was a few miles away. You rode in awkward silence, which you didn’t think was possible for a man with his comedic timing. Your thoughts drifted to earlier that night when the girls found out about Rachel and Joe, the way they lit up at the juicy details. Your skin crawled at Chrissy’s sad eyes meeting yours, mouthing “It’s okay.” While said out of love, it made you feel smaller than before, like you weren’t reaching your full potential, which you knew deep down was bullshit.

“Eddie, what would you rate me from 1 to 10?” You asked abruptly as he jumped slightly at the sudden voice, but also the question. “I am not answering that, no fuckin’ way.” He said, eyes going wider than you thought possible as he gripped the steering wheel. You whined, crossing your arms as you shifted in your seat to face him.

“C’mon Eddie, please! I need a guy's input and from one that doesn’t annoy me everytime he speaks.” His laugh filled the van as he stopped on the backroad, surrounded by trees. You were high enough to release some inhibitions, but not high enough to not mean what you were saying. He faced towards you, resting his face on his fist, making a thinking sound, “What am I exactly rating you on, princess?”

“I don’t know! Anything? Do you like my smile? My personality? Hell, even my tits? Just something!” You gasped, a devious smile resting on his lips with his blush not going unnoticed, feeling a bit thrown off from your outburst. “Well I’ll just say to start off, all are great, some things more than others,” He winked as you rolled your eyes, “But I’m not rating you, though your desperation is cute.” You sighed at his words, cupping your face in your hands, palms digging to your eyes.

“I’m-Ugh I’m not desperate, I’m just over being a virgin! Why does everyone in this town suck!” You expressed, flailing your arms beside you, “I mean, some swallow, if that makes you feel better?” Which made you laugh, glancing over at him as he rubbed his hands on his jean clad thighs. “In all seriousness, if you want it, just go for it. Most of the guys suck, especially the ones who go out for football, but you’re pretty and smart and worthy of having a nice first time, okay? So I’m not rating you and if any guy says he will, punch them.” He concluded, staring in your eyes seriously, not knowing he practically soaked your panties from the amount of respect he had for you. He didn’t belittle your needs, didn’t try to convince you the guys didn’t suck and you just needed to open up more. No, he heard you, he actually listened and understood. You cupped your hands around his jaw, “Can I kiss you, please?” The words falling from your lips softer than intended, but Eddie could tell you were serious and he didn’t want to pull away either. He cupped your face and gently kissed your lips, allowing your hands to fall in your lap. His lips felt like pillows with his teeth capturing your bottom lip, a moan coming from you to grant him more access.

You thought Eddie was always cute and respectful, a bit of a freak in the best way, and you just couldn’t believe it was him who you’d feel comfortable enough with first. Most guys would’ve started hitting on you the moment you mentioned sex, but he didn’t, you even knew that this kiss wouldn’t have happened unless you had initiated it. Eddie was slowly taking control as his lips moved hasiter against yours, only pulling away in a sharp breath as he realized your location.

“You wanna come to my place?”

----

You had never been more grateful that your parents were out of town for the week as Eddie pulled into your driveway. The ride there wasn’t as tense as you thought, mainly just banter about miscellaneous topics, which helped keep your nerves at bay, and making sure he didn’t get lost.

You grabbed your keys and walked to the front door, Eddie hot on your tail after locking the van. You turned on a light or two, greeting your small black cat, Luna. She scurried away after the initial greeting as you walked Eddie into your kitchen, grabbing a water to soothe your burning throat from the weed and nerves. You offered him a drink, but he took his time observing the scenery, “We can go up to my room if you want?”

He followed you quietly, taking time to notice all the details of your messy room, before you sat on the bed, looking up at him. He glided over, cupping your face once more to kiss you deeply before pulling off his signature Hellfire shirt. You stared at his decorated skin, wanting to trace the ink engraved to his body as you laid down beneath him. He worked his way down your neck, finding a soft spot on your collarbone that made you moan, feeling him smile against the delicate skin. You were getting impatient, grabbing your sweater and slipping it off to reveal your plain bra, quickly flinging that away too. His eyes scanned your chest, tongue sticking out as he saw your nipples, scooping down to suck on them.

“Fuck Eddie.” You whimpered, feeling his hands trail down your naval, shivering at his cold rings. He stood up, yanking his pants down to expose his black boxers, his cock already alert. You swallowed harshly as he gripped the sides of your panties and shorts, “Hey. Look at me.” Your eyes flickered to his, containing an emotion you couldn’t make out just yet.

“I need you to be honest with me, okay? Do you want this?” You nodded, “If at any time you want to stop, tell me. Even if it's on the brink of no return, we’ll stop, it’s never too late to change your mind. I won’t be mad.” He said in a low whisper, your profuse nodding not being enough, you had to be vocal. “I want this, Eddie, there’s no one else I’d rather do this with.”

With that, he yanked your last articles of clothing off, spreading your legs to see your soaking center, “Fuck me.” He mumbled, kneeling on the floor to put his face in front of your most vulnerable area, squirming when he had yet to touch you. “Sh, all in good time, just want to look.” His finger brushed your lips, spreading to find your clit and kissing it, your other hand gripping your waist to hold you still. Your weepy hole was glistening in the shining moonlight, he wished he could hang it in a personal art museum. He was barely touching you and had you falling apart.

“You look so pretty like this, all spread out for me.” He breathed, working his other fingers inside of you, the sudden intrusion making you clench and grab the hand that held your hip. He laced his fingers in yours, still pressing it against where it had been previously for stability. His tongue flicked the bundle of nerves that ached to be attended to, his slender hands finding your g-spot within seconds. He quickened his pace as he realized you were reaching your climax, not wanting to tease you your first time finishing with company. He swapped his mouth and fingers, sucking on your hole to catch the sweet release that flowed out shortly after accompanied by your moans. He glanced up at your blissed face cumming and decided it was the 8th wonder of the world. He climbed on top of you, resting his weight on his arm with his other occupied with your laced fingers.

“That felt good, sweet girl?” Your eyes still clenched as you nodded, finally opening them to look at him. His chin was glistening with your release which could’ve made you come all over again in itself, but you crashed your lips into his, wasting no time to build intensity. He quickly took control of the tempo, grunting as you sunk deeper into the bed, legs wrapping around his clothed waist. You used your feet to push them off, making him pull away with a smile, “Someone’s resourceful!”

He sat up to reach for his pants, pulling out his wallet to grab the spare condom he kept for backup, despite not getting any in over a year. It was hard to keep his composure as he slid the latex over himself, stroking while biting his lip. He would’ve laughed if someone told him he’d be fucking a cheerleader by the end of the night, not only that, but one he always thought stood out. He always noticed you when he was forced to attend a rally or game, finding you exuded energy he couldn’t pinpoint. His eyes lingered on you when he walked down the hall or saw you outside of school, not even entertaining the thought of doing anything, but now that he was here. You laid in front of him, waiting for him to do anything to you to help soothe the need you had. He wishes he would’ve done it sooner.

“Alright, this can happen two ways tonight, princess. Do you want to be on top or on the bottom?” He gritted, containing his shaking voice, as your eyes stared in his. You shrugged, adjusting to close your legs as he stood, “Uh uh, words.” His command made you want to do whatever he wanted, whether it left you in bliss or tears. But you wanted to be a good partner, deciding starting on top might be more beneficial for him, though he was grateful for any position.

“I’ll go on top” Stuttering as you sat up, giving him room to lay beneath you, his upper half resting against pillows as he helped you get your shaking hips over his. His cock was pink and leaking, resting against his stomach in front of you, letting your finger trace the vein that guided all the way to the tip. He knew he wouldn’t last long, you were ruining him and you hadn’t even done anything yet.

“Spit.” He instructed, his ring clad hand that had just been deep in your pussy, shoved in front of your mouth as you followed his directions. He began stroking himself more as you lifted yourself, shuffling over where he ached. He glided his tip across your folds, letting his eyes flutter shut at the silk like feeling before getting stopped by your hole. He looked into your eyes as both your mouths fell open as you slowly fell down. A cry left your lips with your hands grabbing at his chest, making it half way before ceasing, tears falling down your cheeks.

“It’s okay, pretty girl, let it out.” He guided your chest against his, keeping eye contact that you kept attempting to break from shyness. He grabbed your hips, rocking you gently and hushing gently as you whimpered. “You’re doing so good, you’re taking me so well.” He cooed, making sure to be as gentle as possible, which didn’t go unnoticed. Your need surpassed your awareness, shoving yourself all the way with a shriek, feeling so full you began to shake.

“Hey! Hey, easy.” He scolded, lifting your hips towards the top, only keeping his tip in. He wiped the tears beneath your eyes, taking in your face that was a mix of pleasure and pain. “Are you okay?” You nodded, remembering what he said as you gumbled out an “I’m okay.” He nodded, sliding you off as you let out a pathetic noise that you wished never came out, but he didn’t flinch, just placing you on your back. His mouth found its way to your neck as he slid in again. He found your sensitive spot, sucking on it to distract from the unpleasant ache between your legs. He used his hands to push your knees up, taking a moment to raise upwards to look at you fall apart. "Fuck, you're so pretty."

You embraced the feeling of him thrusting inside you, mesmerized by the way the same veins you stroked moments ago were inside you, causing pleasure throughout your body. Eddie found himself pulling you down all the way and holding you there as you mewled. Fresh tears released from your eyes as you fondled your own breast, shaking. His eyes darkened, replacing your hands with his as he began to fondle your tits and picking up his pace. This didn’t last long before you pulled him against you, missing the weight of him and his lips on yours.

“Thank you. Thank you, Eddie, please. Oh my God.” You whimpered, continuing the mantra of gratitude as you found yourself nearing the end. He moaned so loud you were almost positive the neighbors heard, but you didn’t care. He never considered himself a man with a praise kink, but when a girl is not only begging for you, but thank you for fucking her? There’s only so much a man can take, especially when he felt you starving off your orgasm.

“Let it out, baby, come on. You feel so good, sweetheart, I’m right behind ya.” He growled, mouth pressed against the shell of your ear, nibbling. You weren’t strong enough to hold off any longer, falling apart in his arms as he finished in sync, thrusts shallowing out as he felt you constrict. The praises left your lips without hesitation, gripping onto his chest tightly with his arms returning just as tight. Your whimpers continued for a moment before a loud shaky breath, “I’m sorry for crying, that's so embarrassing.” You groaned, shifting beneath him as he pulled away from your neck, “Don’t you dare. That was the hottest fucking thing I’ve ever seen.” He stated, eyes boring into yours before pulling out and discarding his protection. He grabbed his boxers, pulling them on and grabbing his tee, handing it to you with raised eyebrows, making you blushed.

“Really, that’s what makes you flustered?” He teased, laying back down with your faces across from each other. Sitting in silence, you both studied each other, almost as if you looked long enough, you’d find out every emotion you just endured. He stroked your cheek affectionately, nudging into his broad palm, nipping at it playfully. As you came down from euphoria, your worries seeped through. What did this mean? Would this be a regular thing? Would he ever speak to you again? So many thoughts ruminated that it spread across your face, his eyebrows pinched with worry when you acknowledged your surroundings.

“Did you enjoy tonight?” You inquired as he made a shocked face before smiling, “Let’s just say that if you asked me to rate this, I’d break the fucking scale.” He chuckled, moving his hand to tickle your side, making you squeal and fling your body against him. “You’re such an asshole for that, Munson.” Silence filled the room as he held you against his chest, your bodies fitting like puzzle pieces beneath your sheets. “Can we do this again sometime?” Trailing off as you traced his various tattoos, hypnotized by his body and what it encapsulated. “Hell yeah, I’m always horny.” He joked, “But seriously, yes, we can do this whenever you want, princess.”

You didn’t expect yourself to have your first time with the guy you always admired from afar, but tonight you were engulfed in his arms, feeling safe and happy for once. As you jogged out on the field the next day, ignoring the soreness between your thighs, you spotted him in the stands where he never would have been previously. With a quick wink, he stood up and hollered as you couldn't contain your laughter. You could get used to this.

-----

hi! thank you for reading, eddie's my muse atm so please send in requests! feedback is always appreciated. have a great day!

[neochan]

GENRE | smut, idolverse!

WARNINGS | smut

WC | 2.6k +

A.N | this is a repost of my older work. i hope you enjoy it <3

You could still hear the unintelligible screaming of thousands of fans as the boys filtered off the stage and into the greenroom. Another successful concert in the long string of tour stops. You couldn’t even remember what state you were in because the days of traveling, unpacking, setting up, and doing it all again the next day ran together.

The boys were dripping sweat, immediately grabbing bottles of water and towels to wipe themselves off. They had worked harder than normal today since during one of the sets the microphone cut out and they had to perform acapella. Someone was getting fired for that.

Taeyong flopped onto the leather couch dominating the center of the room, water in one hand, phone in the other. “People are already uploading photos.” He outstretches his arm so the others could view the pictures pulled up on his screen.

“Johnny you look ridiculous,” you point out, laughing as a fan had caught Johnny in the act of wildly waving his light stick.

“I was having a good time, okay?” He chuckles and walks into the dressing rooms to change out of his stage outfit. Half of the group filtered out to change and half stayed to peruse through the gifts left by venue staff and play on their phones until told otherwise.

You were wondering where Hyuck was when you heard his voice from the hallway. He saunters in and gives you a kiss on the cheek, “Enjoy the show?” His golden skin was tainted pink, hair matted to his forehead by the sweat that was trickling down the side of his face. He grabbed his shirt and lifted it to swipe at his face, revealing his cute tummy. You had to resist the urge to poke it.

“I enjoyed hearing thousands of pretty fans scream your name” You give him a smirk knowing that he hates when you downplay your relationship.

He nudges you with his shoulder, “You know I meant the songs,” his doe eyes look into yours, his long lashes brushing against his cheek when he blinked “Besides, you know I love you and only you.”

Mark began to nervously giggle in the corner while Doyoung made fake gagging noises from the vanity he sat at. “Oh, shut up.” You say, throwing empty water bottles at the two, “And hurry up I wanna go swimming before it gets too late.”

The ride home was peaceful once the swarms of fans cleared a path for the bus. Per the managers request you slouched down in your seat so know one could see you through the window. It didn’t make much sense because the windows were tinted, but Haechan had to argue for his life to allow them to let you tag along on the tour, so you didn’t question them. Once you were on the road, you sat back up and snuggled close to Haechans side. He rested his hand on your thigh, absentmindedly stroking you with his thumb. His head leaned back against the seat, eyes closed, listening to music. It was so loud you could almost make out the words but you didn’t say anything – you let him stay in his post concert utopia for the whole trip.

The hotel was about an hour away from the venue so that no one would find them, and they’d be closer to their next destination. It was nicer than the others because it actually had a pool. You and Haechan made an agreement to go swimming after the concert, and you couldn’t wait. The staff also rented more rooms, so instead of four people to a bed, it was just you and Haechan.

After checking in everyone filtered off to their rooms leaving the both of you to freely do whatever you wanted - within reason of course. You both got changed, your gaze admiring the hard lines of Haechans back. “Don’t stare.” He blushed, wrapping a towel around his upper body.

You pulled on your bikini which made Haechan go silent. You specifically picked this one because it brought out your skin tone well, and cupped your features beautifully. “Now who’s staring?”

It never failed. The butterfly feeling you got in the pit of your stomach when Haechan watched you with loving eyes. You wrapped a towel around your waist, allowing Haechans eyes to roam the tops of your breasts, peeking out from the almost too small bathing suit.

His cheeks turned pink once he noticed he was caught, “Let’s go”.

The hallways were quiet since it was almost midnight, so you wordlessly made your way down the stairs and out into the night air. It had grown considerably cooler than when guys first arrived that morning, but the sky made up for it. Pretty stars pricked the vast expanse of dark blue and black infinity. You could see the moon peaking out from behind a single cloud, casting a shadowed glow on Haechans honey skin.

The gate was closed when you walked up to it so you stopped to read, “Aw man, the pool closed an hour ago,” You set your lips in a pout, “no wonder the lights weren’t on.”

“Hey it’s okay, no lights, no cameras, they probably wont even notice we’re here if we keep quiet.” He moves closer to you, eyebrows raised expectant for an answer.

You hesitated wondering if you really could pull it off, after all you’d been looking forward to this for the whole day, “I don’t wanna get in trouble..”

“You said you wanted to swim and I’m going to make sure that happens,” He gets down on one knee, “step on my leg, I'm gonna help you jump the fence.”

He boots you over, and grabs your arms to help lower you on the other side, but his hand slips and his nails dig into your shoulder. “Ow, fuck.” You wince rubbing the spot he scratched.

“Sorry, sorry” He says giggling, jumping the fence with such quietness and ease that it looked unreal. “Come on, dare you to do a canon ball!?”

He ran ahead throwing his towel on one of the pool chairs and jumping in the water. You cringe away from the loud slap his body hitting the water made. You walk slowly to the chair, deeply inhaling the addictive chlorine scent.

He finally stands up waist deep in the water and pushes his hair back. The blue water reflected against him, making his skin sparkle. “Come into the water y/n” he splashed some water into your general direction, but not enough to touch you.

“Okay, Okay.” You drop the towel and slip into the water. It was cold. Really cold. You gasp and recoil away, but not fast enough, because Haechan has wrapped his arms around you and started carrying you towards the deep end. You struggle a bit in his grip but his arms provide an iron cage that you can’t get out of. “Haechan let me go!”

He presses a warm kiss to the back on your neck but doesn’t comply with your wishes, instead making a curve and bringing you towards the underwater benches. He fixes his hold on you so that now he’s carrying you bridal style. You stare up at him, water droplets falling off his chin. His eyes were already red from the chlorine and you hoped that it cleared up by tomorrow nights concert. His plush lips sat in a pout, strong jaw set. He was so very pretty; and all yours. You smiled to yourself, deciding to keep that image locked away in your memory forever.

Once he gets to the benches he sets you down and glides in beside you. “You know It’s colder than I thought it was going to be.” He lifts a hand and sheepishly rubs the back of heck, “and you look way hotter in that bikini than I thought you would.”

“I don’t know if that’s supposed to be a dig or a compliment.” You scoot closer to him so that your thighs were pressed against each other. Finding his hand underwater, you intertwine your fingers with his own.

“A compliment babe.” He chuckles and slouches in the water so that only his head sat above it. You both sit there for a moment until it becomes too cold to sit still.

“Well I’m going to put it to use and go swim.” You push off from the cement and paddle around. The only way to stay slightly warm was to keep moving. Haechan watched you, eyes crinkled in a smile, bottom lip caught between his teeth. It was fun to watch you play in the water but the bathing suit was making him think of other things you two could be doing.

And that was how it stayed. Haechan watching while you performed for him.

A while had passed, the calm exterior of the pool getting to you, making you drowsy. The cold blue water washed over your hands while you gently skimmed the surface, making your way over to where Haechan was. You hummed a short tune under your breath, trying to keep yourself distracted. it was close to one in the morning now, but Haechan still sat on the bench, slightly shivering from the brisk air, hands gripping his thighs under the water while his mind wandered far away from the present.

“Watcha thinkin’ about” you ask, moving closer to him, hoping to catch some lingering body warmth.

“Fucking you ,” he moved off the seat and dove under the surface, only leaving small ripples in his wake. You stand there for a second wonder how he could be so blunt, so forward in his desires; he was never like this.

He swam a single circle around your body before popping up in front of you, giving you a mini heart attack. He pushes you back against the tiled walls, “I’ve spent the last hour thinking about fucking you. Thinking about how pretty you’d sound.” His head dips down to kiss along your collarbone, and your hands grab the back of neck, holding him there while his tongue sucked bruises into your tender skin. His hands grazed the bare skin of your arms, giving you goosebumps.

He moaned into the side of your neck, biting and sucking away, wanting you to yearn for him like he did for you. He lifted his head so that his mouth hung over yours, his small puffs of breath fanning over your face while he tests the waters. “Can I kiss you?”

Without giving him an answer you pull him closer by the roots of his hair. His kissing was messy and sweet, and while your tongues moved together, his hips began rubbing circles against you, trying to gain some friction in the cool water. Small heavy breaths were the only sound you could hear, aside from the occasional splash as Haechan moved restlessly.

Your hand wandered down his chest and below the surface to where you could feel him straining against his shorts. You began to stroke him over the fabric, his hips pushing against your touch. He broke the kiss to watch as you peeled down the elastic from his hips, his cock freed from the restricting material of his swim shorts. You watched him twitch slightly as the cold water met his length.

“You can’t make any noise.” You place a single finger against his lips.

“No promises.” He whispers, a devilish smirk breaking way on his face. His hands caress you thighs, pushing your bottoms to the side. The cold water hit you, making you gasp and push into Haechan who just whimpers against your touch.

He tried to stay quiet, only soft grunts between gritted teeth and muffled moans as his hips pushed into your own. The water created resistance but it just enhanced how good he was feeling. He hurriedly grabs at your legs, pulling them up so that they sat around his waist. Your back dragged up the tiled walls, scraping your tender skin, but you could only focus on Haechans cock thrusting deeply in and out of you. He stared longingly into your eyes, filling you up completely, wanting to savor the way they fluttered in the back of your head.

“You love the way I fill you up huh?” He groans into your ear, a hand falling forward to grip the cement ledge of the pool.

You couldn’t respond without fear of moaning so you nod your head wildly. He began to bite and suck at your collarbone, pushing you closer to the edge. Looking down he sees your nipples, erect, poking through the wet fabric of your bathing suit. His eyes grow wide, hips stuttering into you. Fuck you were hot.

“Haechannie, I think I’m going to come.” You squeezed your eyes shut trying to focus on the feeling coiling in your stomach.

“Not yet.” He growls, hands moving to pin your wrists against the cement ledge, “Hold it princess, I know you can.” The water began to slosh around faster as Haechan thrusted harder into you. The sound was so loud its no wonder you didn’t hear the keys jangling against the hip of the guard making his way towards you two.

“Hey!,” he shouts running towards you, “The pool is closed! Get out! Are you two-” He didn’t get a chance to finish his sentence as you and Haechan spring up out of fear and take off. It was easy to push yourself up onto the pool deck. The guard made the mistake of following you two and leaving the gate unattended. You and Haechan ran out, giggling, making your way back into the hotel. You didn’t stop until you got into the room and slammed the door behind you.

With your heart hammering in your chest you lean against the dark cherry wood . “Holy fuck we could’ve gotten in serious trouble.” You gasp out, clutching a hand against your wet bathing suit top.

“Babe we’ll be gone by morning, no one is gonna know.” Haechan paces in front of you trying to catch his breath. His shorts hung dangerously low on his hips, it was miracle he got them up in time.

“We’re so banned from this hotel.” A knock on the door makes you jump away from it, the worst of punishment's filling your mind. What were they going to do? They couldn’t arrest you, could they?

Haechan walks forward and turns the knob slowly, revealing a sleepy Doyoung. His oversized t-shirt hung off one shoulder showing off his gaunt collarbone. He was rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

“What do you want Doie?” you ask softly.

“How was getting chased by the guard?” he gives a sleepy chuckle, still half in his dreams.

“How did you-,” A look of realization hits Haechan, “You reported us?” He whined, pushing Doyoungs bare shoulder so that he stumbled back.

“Sound travels over water dumbasses and you guys were loud, I was trying to sleep!” Protesting, he pushes Haechans wet shoulder back.

“Well, now we’re going to be twice as loud.” Haechan slams the door in Doyoungs face and grabs you, throwing you on the bed. You give a squeal, and hear Doyoungs fist hit the door.

“I swear I’ll make a noise complaint.” He sounded more irritated than sleepy now.

“Go ahead, you’re just mad I’m getting laid and you aren't.” You playfully slap Haechans arm, but he nips at your hand. The other side of the door grows silent, Doyoung either going to report you two, or going back to his room defeated.

“Shall we pick up where we left off princess?”

[ateezmakemeweep]

playing with fire (part 1)

word count: 23k

fluff, smut (warning: age gap, infidelity, roommate’s father)

(series masterlist)

“is there any other way you could pay?” the woman behind the desk asked, stout and soft spoken with sympathy in her eyes.

she probably has to have this conversation with students a lot, tell them that their tuition payment didn’t go through or that they’re not eligible for government support.

or that the athletics department needed more scholarship money, successfully rendering you, one of the many photography majors on campus, unable to pay for your last semester of college.

“a loan of some sort or another scholarship, maybe?” she tried to help, “i could send over an e-mail of ones you might be eligible for.”

you swallow the lump forming in your throat, attempting to calm all the anxiety and stress violently making its way through your body.

“y-yes, that would be great, thank you,” you barely manage to get out, hoping and praying to some unknown force above that you don’t burst into tears.

you were nearing the end of the fall semester, the last fall semester you ever anticipated of having, when you found out just last week that you were no longer eligible for your scholarship.

in a short, curt e-mail explaining that, while you kept up your gpa and never strayed from the requirements, they’ve maxed out their amount of funding and are looking to use that money elsewhere.

“can they do that!?” your best friend and roommate of four years yelps, gucci sunglasses atop her head as she stomps around your shared, off-campus apartment.

“they can’t seriously do that! you’ve been a straight a student since you started and now they wanna take it away?! before your last semester of senior year?!”

“eunbi, it’s not ideal but i’ve already come to terms with it,” you explain gently, leaving out the part where you did, in fact, have a break down right outside the bursar office only an hour ago. “i’ll just save up money and come back in the fall to finish.”

“that’s so not right or fair though!” she whines, something about the concept of not getting what she wants unfamiliar to your roommate.

you first met park eunbi during freshmen move in day, your two raggedy luggages and beat up backpacks an embarrassing contrast to the multiple louis vuitton travel bags she lunged in.

you were intimidated for all of three seconds, before she looked at you with a smile and threw her arms around you like a long lost best friend.

it was obvious she came from money, the way she spoke and carried herself so confidently before her parents came in and introduced themselves.

they were both gorgeous and tall and looked far too young to have an 18-year-old daughter, covered in fancy jewelry and expensive looking clothing.

her dad, who introduced himself as mr. park seonghwa, didn’t seem to bat an eye at your more humble appearance. he reminded you a lot of eunbi, honest and genuine in the way he was kind and nonjudgemental.

mrs. park seemed nice enough, too, though you could see the judgement behind her pretty eyes.

the way she sneered at your bags and looked down at your hands, so different from her and her daughter’s not covered in diamond bracelets or acrylic nails.

“did we just miss your parents?” she asked, her voice just as pretty and rich sounding as she appeared; you bet if she laughed, she’d had have that melodic, care-free laugh all rich women seem to have.

“oh, uh, yeah, i’m sorry,” you apologized, lying through your teeth with a shy smile and averting gaze - you had to move in by yourself, the same way you traveled here all alone with no one to send you off.

“it’s okay, we just thought it’d be nice to meet them,” eunbi’s father interjects, the smile on his handsome face causing your stomach to swoop - how is he a dad?

“we were gonna take eunbi to an early dinner before we left. do you wanna join us?”

“oh no, it’s okay, i’d hate to intru-”

“no, you’re coming, c’mon!” your new roommate whined, grabbing your hand and pulling you toward the door. “we’ll be able to get a lot of dessert out of them. probably the whole menu if we wanted.”

and you saw that over the years, eunbi knew she could, in fact, get whatever she wanted from her parents. they had the money and the means and the fondness in their hearts for their only daughter.

but it never seemed to get to your friend.

she was always kind and thoughtful of others and never said or did anything to suggest she was just a brainless, spoiled rich kid.

even in your guy’s second year when she found out you were going to school on an academic scholarship, she didn’t care. she didn’t turn her nose up or think you were lesser than her for not having the funds; if anything, it only made her praise you more.

that you were smart and ambitious enough to work under the strict guidelines of a prestigious scholarship.

“i know it’s not fair,” you mumble, not wanting to cry or have another anxiety attack over this matter. “but it is what it is. i’ll figure it out.”

she lets out a dejected, defeated sigh so uncharacteristic of the girl, plopping down on her pink, fluffy bed and bringing you down with her.

“we’ll sell feet pics over winter break,” she concludes after a few minutes of silence, wrapping her arm around yours and curling her body into yours. “you know how much money we can get from that? and we have pretty feet,” she says, sticking her leg up and wiggling her red, painted toes.

there’s a little less tightness in your chest and a little heaviness lifted in your stomach as you let out a giggle, looking over at your best friend who truly got you through the last four years of school.

you really don’t know how you’d still be functioning if it weren’t for her.

“you’re sick.”

“i’m serious,” she giggles out, flipping on her side and causing the bed to bounce under you. “you’re still good with coming tomorrow, right? i told my parents you were.”

she had invited you to her house for the winter break this year, the girl not wanting you to spend a month alone in the apartment.

you’ve shared with her how strained your relationship with your parents has been, really, since birth. never seeing eye to eye to them and feeling as if they never had your best interests at heart.

when most kids get full ride scholarships, their parents are immensely proud. bragging about how smart they are and telling them how proud they were.

but your parents were the opposite.

they didn’t want you to up and leave them to pursue an education. they thought you were gonna stay with them forever, not go to college like them and help run the family business back home in your tiny little hometown.

it was your dream to go to college and get a degree, though, so that’s exactly what you did for yourself; but they saw it as a giant fuck you.

saw it as you thinking you were better than them and basically told you to never come back if you thought you were so much smarter and better off without them.

so you’d spent every winter or summer vacation in the dorms, this year finally being the time you accepted eunbi’s invitation to stay over - reluctantly.

“i packed all my stuff, yeah,” you mumble, hands twisted into one another nervously. “but... are you sure they’re okay with it? i don’t wanna intrude or be there if i’m not wanted.”

“y/n, please,” she whines, “my mom may be a raging bitch but you know i make the rules in that house.”

“that’s not what i meant,” you mutter immediately, looking to the girl with a small frown on your lips.

although it was no secret eunbi’s mom didn’t ever seem too fond of you, always sneering at your off-brand items or questioning the logistics of why exactly you needed a scholarship to afford college, you always tried to remain polite.

smile at her and greet her happily even though there was always a thick, palpable tension between you two.

“oh but it is,” she chuckles out, the girl far too aware of what a materialistic snob her mother is. “it’s fine, i know she’s a bitch. my dad’s just coming tomorrow anyway. i told him to bring one of the bigger cars so we can lay out in the back.”

you have to bite back a snarky comment about the fact there are multiple cars in question, though the look in your eye certainly gives it away. she can only giggle and shrug her shoulders, flopping onto her back as she tells you about how excited she is to be reunited with her boyfriend.

eunbi and jiwoon have been dating since their second year of high school, going to colleges only an hour away from each other; he was just as handsome as he was kind and good to her, leaving you with no other option but to love and support the both of them.

and you try to listen to her rambling that ensues, you really do, but your mind is swirling with some slight anxiety about staying with her family for a month.

you don’t wanna make her mom even more irritated, deal with the side eyes and passive aggressive comments and overall feeling of just not being wanted.

you don’t want eunbi to feel obligated to be with you 24/7, act as a cock block to her and her boyfriend who haven’t seen each other in almost six weeks.

and maybe, you don’t want your tiny, small, miniscule crush on mr. park to make you feel any more awkward than it does, wondering how a married man who has a daughter in college is still so handsome and alluring.

it also doesn’t help that he’s just so incredibly kind, always making everyone feel so comfortable and welcomed, it’d be hard not to just develop a little, secret crush on him.

“eunbi, who is that sexy ass man who just dropped you off?” one of your suite mates asks your roommate, everyone gathering back in front of the dorm building after winter break.

it was sophomore year and you spent a month in the quiet, almost eerie college dorms alone (apart from the ra down the hall). you were grateful for everyone to return, no matter how loud or catty things were about to become.

“yeah, for real. is that your new boyfriend? he’s hotter than the last one and i didn’t even think that was possible.”

“uhhh.. no,” eunbi says, shooting the crowd of girls with lustful eyes and curious glances a look of distaste. “that’s my dad.”

and that’s when a chorus of disbelief and inappropriate comments erupted from the group of college girls.

asking how a dad could look like that while hoping and praying he’s single.

inquiring about just how much her dad’s on campus and when’s the next time he’s gonna pick her up.

about how he’s definitely hotter than her boyfriend, with a more mature and sophisticated look than these college boys.

“are they fucking serious! like how disgusting? he’s my literal father!” eunbi rages once in the dorm room, sharing a few curse words and vulgar phrases at the girl’s before stomping away from them.

“and for them to say that shit in front of me? did they think i want to hear that?”

“i know, that was so sick,” you agree, because even though you, too, think he’s attractive, it’s not something you would ever verbalize to your friend.

“like... i know he’s younger than most dads, my parents had me when they were teenagers, but shit! how sick,” she rants, throwing down her heavy designer bags and flopping on her bed.

you can tell by the look on her face how much it truly bothers her, everyone always noticing her dad and making comments like that. she handles it well, she’s always able to handle herself well, but it doesn’t take away from the fact that it’s something that worries her.

people getting close to her to get to her dad, even if it was teachers or other moms in elementary school or her friends when she got to college.

it’s one of the many reasons you would never give away your little crush on him - because it’s not only inappropriate and uncomfortable for her to know but there’s also no need to tell her.

because it’s not like it would go anywhere.

he’s a married man and your roommate’s father, a twisted, dark, forbidden fantasy that will stay in the walls of your head and never see the light of day - no matter how thrilling and fulfilling being with him would be.

“eunbi, your dad’s gonna be here soon,” you yell into your roommate’s doorway, met with the sound of her groaned “five more minutes!” that you’ve been hearing for the past twenty.

she was on facetime with jiwoon when you went to bed around one, briefly waking to the sound of her girlish screams or high-pitched giggles three hours later; you wouldn’t be surprised if she only went to bed a few hours ago.

“you said five more minutes thirty minutes ago,” you say, stomping your way over before smacking her over the head with a pillow. she lets out a loud sigh before swatting you away, your surprisingly fast reflexes grabbing her wrist.

she peeks one eye open as a smirk covers her morning face, looking from you all dressed up and ready in your pink pleated skirt and white thigh high stockings, down to her wrist in your hold.

“that was kinda hot. and you look good. i don’t know how to act right now.”

“shut up and get your ass out of bed,” you demand, biting back a smile as you storm out of her room.

you’d been pacing around the apartment ever since you woke up at seven a.m., more and more unsettled about staying over her house as the time drew closer.

you checked to make sure you had enough clothes and chargers and skincare products for nearly an hour, finally settling the same purple suitcase you moved in with freshmen year near the door.

you hope mrs. park doesn’t notice, remembering the way she sneered at the wonky zipper and slightly stained bottom.

you also hope you can keep yourself in check, not get too nervous or flustered by eunbi’s exorbitant wealth or a new setting you don’t feel welcomed in or her hot ass father whose bones you wanna jump.

the knock at the door completely sobers you, jumping in your spot just in time to see eunbi fly across the living room to get to the door. there’s a big, happy smile on her face, ripping open the door and greeting her father in typical eunbi fashion.

“are those for me?” she asks, snatching the red box from his hands.

excitement bubbles inside the girl as she unveils twelve chocolate covered strawberries, a speciality at one of the local dessert shops just a few miles from her home.

“you shouldn’t have, dad, really. i’m much too tired to appreciate this.”

the man can only look at his daughter with a look of disdain and affection, waking up to an extremely passive aggressive text that she’d really appreciate an early morning treat from her favorite place ever and that it’d really inspire her to be ready.

but as he can currently see, given the state of her hair and pajamas pants, it didn’t at all act as a motivator.

“then maybe i should just-” but upon her father’s hand reaching out to grab the box of strawberries, the girl brings it to her body and runs away, yelling that her bags are packed and she’s just gonna wash her face.

he looks to you with a mock annoyed expression, your heart jumping in your chest as you send him a small, polite smile.

“how do you deal with her, y/n?” he asks, a smirk on his face rising as you let out a soft, slightly forced giggle - this man looks too good for his own good at ten o’clock in the morning.

“don’t talk shit about me!” she yelps before you can even think to say something, a smile lighting up his face again before he nods his head down the hall.

“i’ll bring down your girl’s bags,” he says, his tall, large frame coming toward you making your knees feel slightly wobbly.

you swear you see his eyes roam over you for the shortest of seconds, down to your shirt and exposed legs before back to your face, until he’s looking into your eyes questioningly.

totally not like someone who just checked out their daughter’s roommate - this is what you feared, your own delusionals and attraction making your crazy little brain see something that’s not there.

“her bedroom’s down that hall?”

you resist the urge to swallow nervously, begging yourself to snap out of it and remind yourself you have to deal with the man for a month. a month of his dark, piercing eyes and bright, white smile and skin so smooth and clear, it’s far too easy to forget he’s almost forty years old.

“yeah,” you barely manage to get out. “i-i can help and bring down mine.”

“no, it’s okay,” he insists, “help in getting eunbi ready. you know she’ll delay us thirty more minutes.”

you let out another strained chuckle as you nod your head, finally letting out the breath you’ve been holding when you hear his footsteps disappear down the hall and into her room.

as long as you distance yourself from him, not look him in the eye or let any sort of idea get in your head that an older, married man could want you back, this will be fine.

it’ll be a nice, calm, relaxed break actually full of interaction and socialization opposed to your usual lonely bubble of solitude.

eunbi’s not making that very easy though, when twenty minutes later, she’s opening the back door of her father’s black g-wagen and sprawling out on the black leather seats.

“where’s y/n supposed to go, eunbi?” seonghwa asked, the fatherly tone is his voice causing eunbi to let out a huff; the only time you see eunbi’s spoiled tendencies come out is around her father, the girl knowing he’ll do anything and everything for her.

and apparently, so will you.

sitting in the front seat of her car, next to her extremely hot father you’re trying to stay calm around, while she sleeps soundly in the backseat - if she didn’t invite to stay at her home, meals and bed and transportation free, you’d say she has to owe you.

“was she up all night talking to jiwoon?” mr. park asked, the past few moments of silence just as comforting as they were terrifying. it felt awkward to you, extremely tense and full of suspense, but you knew it was completely normal.

you bite down on your lip, looking back at eunbi sleeping soundly on the seat, even prepared with a fuzzy white blanket. you let out a soft giggle when you see her mouth open, the slightest bit of drool hanging from her mouth and threatening to spill on the dark leather.

“she might’ve been,” you mutter, a breathy laugh leaving her father that causes you to sneak a glance at him.

there’s not a hint of a wrinkle or imperfection on his glowing skin, black hair hanging in his face and red lips quirked into a content smile. that’s something you always noticed about him, despite his dark appearance and looming figure, he always appears to be happy.

smiles and laughs and never gives anyone without his same wealth a dirty glance - he treats everyone the same and that’s another reason you’ve taking a liking to him, not just because he’s the hottest man you’ve ever seen in your life.

“y/n?” he asks, your intrusive thoughts being ripped away at the sound of his voice calling your name.

your eyes move to his and he’s watching you in slight amusement, a rampant blush creeping up on your cheeks at the way you’ve been caught. you’re quick to look away, shake your head and let out an awkward chuckle and apology.

you miss the way his eyes roam your side profile, a delightful smirk and feeling in his chest blooming before he speaks again.

“how was your semester?”

“it was good,” you say, hands placed nervously in your lap. “a lot of work on top of an internship but it was good.”

“and you girls are almost done,” he hums lowly, one hand atop the steering wheel while his eyes focus on the highway in front of him. “eunbi’s been talking about a combined graduation party since the moment you guys met.”

you let out a small laugh as you remember eunbi’s plan since your second semester of freshmen year, ignoring the twinge of sadness in your stomach.

you could’ve never anticipated delaying your college career when you first received your scholarship, happy and proud and eternally grateful for the opportunity.

but you suppose you’re lucky enough to have gotten this far, and delaying one last semester is nothing compared to people who never get to go to college - but it still makes you feel upset.

you think you have the right to feel disappointed and sad, the lingering sick feeling in your stomach making you feel nauseous.

“is it okay if i open the window for a second?” you mumble to mr. park, the man looking over your face.

he presses down on the passenger window button immediately, your face met with cold air as relief floods through your body.

“are you okay? do you get car sick?” he asks, remembering how much eunbi used to get car sick (on the rare occasion she wasn’t passed out during a road trip).

“not usually,” you mumble, resting your head on the side of the door.

then again, i’m not usually freaking out about making tuition money or repressing my violent attraction to my roommate’s father.

seonghwa watches as you close your eyes for a few moment, allowing the cold, windy air to hit your face. he couldn’t help but notice the pinkish tint to your cheeks, suppressing the urge for his eyes and thoughts to wander.

you’re a college girl in the prime of her life and his daughter’s best friend, he’d be a fool to think you were blushing and nervous because of him - but he also doesn’t remember you looking like.... this.

so pretty and dressed up and pink in the face as you check him out with a soft and curious look in your eye.

“maybe try to take a nap,” he suggests, his gaze lingering back onto the road so he doesn’t look at your exposed legs. “i’ll pull off at a rest stop to get you ginger ale.”

“that’s not necessary, mr. park,” your sweet voice says, something about it causing his insides to jump - he definitely doesn’t remember you sounding like that. “i’ll be okay. just need the window open for a little longer.”

you spend the next few minutes with the cold, december wind blowing through the car, your back pressed against the comfortable seat behind you. a chill runs through your body, goosebumps rising on your exposed thighs, but it feels better than the alternative.

potentially panicking or vomiting due to current stress of your life.

your gaze shifts to the man beside you, whether it be to check him out or ask if he’s cold unknown to you.

“are you okay with the-”

the words are stuck in your throat when you see his eyes aren’t on the road but your exposed, goose-bumpy thighs, the white lace of your thigh high stockings and pink skirt leaving little to the imagination.

you wish you could see the look in his eye, if it’s judgemental and shameful or full of lust and curiosity. if he’s wondering what you have on just a few inches under your skirt and if that’s something he even thinks about.

or maybe he’s just looking because it’s there - your skirt blowing in the wind and him caught off guard by the sight right there in his passenger seat.

“um, i think i’m good now,” you mumble, watching from your peripheral as he shifts in his seat and tightens his hold on the steering wheel.

“alright, let me know if you wanna stop.”

you bite down on your lip as you nod your head, keeping your eyes on the view in front of you.

the faint sounds of eunbi snoring behind you act as a way to ground you, remind you that these thoughts and feelings you’re having can’t stay.

maybe you have to get it our of your system now, take all the looks you can and feel all the hopefulness your delusional brain needs until you act as if eunbi’s father is a mean, disgusting, grotesque man.

not someone who gets your heart and body pounding.

you’re not sure how many songs play on the radio until you both are talking again, seonghwa looking in the rearview mirror to see his daughter still passed out on the seats.

“do you think she’ll sleep the whole time?”

he hope for his sake, she doesn’t.

you look back at eunbi sleeping soundly, the drool previously trickling down her mouth successfully making a pool on the black leather.

“probably,” you chuckle out lightly. “i have a feeling she went to bed around six.”

“shit,” he laughs out, remembering the days he used to be able to pull all nighters in college or dreaded the idea of waking up in the morning. “i can’t remember the last time i was able to stay up past one.”

“you’re not even that old, mr. park,” you tease, not sure where you got the balls to say that and feeling, at least for a few seconds, that you overstepped; but then he lets out a deep, amused chuckle and it causes butterflies to erupt in your stomach.

“not that old, huh?” he quips, your tooth sinking into your lip at the tone of his voice. “you know i’m turning 40 in a few months, right?”

you crane your neck to look at the man in the driver’s seat, swallowing thickly when you see his eyes are already on you. there’s a certain type of lightness and teasing in them that you’ve never seen before, the man always happy and jovial but never like this.

never looking so... teasing and playful.

“yeah,” you say with a growing smirk, not being able to help your own nervous excitement. “that doesn’t seem too bad.”

the deep, low chuckle that leaves him causes your stomach to swoop, eyes wide and the small smile on your face causing him to look over you once more.

it’s shameless and bold but neither of you seem to care in that moment.

“i’ll keep that in mind,” he says, deep brown eyes piercing through yours before his face turns teasing and.. appropriate.. “the next time eunbi tries to call me an old man or something.”

“right,” you chuckle out, cheeks burning and heart pounding as you allow yourself to break eye contact.

the ride to eunbi’s house is just over two hours, hoping and praying that it goes by quickly - because you’re not sure how much longer you’ll be able to be alone, or mostly alone, with him.

you’re thinking too much into his words and his gaze and the way he makes you feel, making you silly enough to believe that, maybe, a part of him wants you too.

the second you arrived at eunbi’s, you had already felt unwelcomed.

not only because of mrs. park, who just about sneered at your presence in her exquisite home, but because of the dozens of other socialites in the immaculately white living room.

it looked and felt almost like a hospital. a white color scheme with black accents, extremely cold and spotless - the only bit of color was in eunbi’s room where it felt like you could actually breathe.

“i’m sorry, i told her not to throw her fucking gathering today,” eunbi complained, grumpy from her nap but still happy to finally be home.

“a bunch of stuck up snobs, i swear to god. they either have to get the stick lodged so far up their asshole removed or get dicked down by their lousy excuses of-”

“eunbi,” you hear her father’s deep voice reprimand, the girl not even feeling the slightest bit of shame or embarrassment for talking that way in front of her father.

“oh, c’mon, dad, you know it’s true!” she whines in a whispered tone. “they’re the worst! and she knew me and y/n were coming today, do you really think that wasn’t a coincidence?”

because, as far as eunbi thinks, she has sinking suspicions that her mom did this solely to make you uncomfortable.

she had already been hesitant to let you stay in the first place, had eunbi not gone full on bitch mode and stubbornly proclaimed she’d spend the break with you at the apartment.

but you didn’t have to know that.

“i don’t care, it’ll just be my first christmas without my family, mom, who cares about that,” she had said, all types of manipulative and toxic behavior that she learned from the best.

she’s sure her mother was sweet and good at one point in her life, she wouldn’t have ended up with her father in the first place if she wasn’t, but money changes people.

wealth and greed and having the power to get anything you want because you flash a stack of money around or write out a check.

“i told her to have them out by dinner,” he said, his eyes moving from eunbi to you, standing there with tense shoulders and a shy, uncomfortable look on your face.

“you’re more than welcomed here, y/n,” he said, his voice low and full of kindness as he stands in eunbi’s doorway. “don’t worry about it, okay?”

you resist the urge to pout at the touched feeling in your chest, looking from the man to eunbi who’s nodding at her dad’s words.

“thank you, mr. park,” you say, a phrase he swears has never effected him this deeply.

and because of that, he’s quick to haul ass out of there. tells you guys that dinner will be ready around seven and to come down whenever.

you and eunbi spend that time in her room to unpack both of your things and watch movies, her king sized bed nearly lulling you to sleep until her loud squeal and bounce of the bed causes you to jump in shock.

“y/n, don’t be mad at me please,” she whines directly in your face, all wide-eyed and cutesy as she looks at you with mock innocence.

“what did you do?” you mumble tiredly, pushing her away with the smallest of sneers.

“i’ll be back for dinner, i promise, but... is it okay if i go to jiwoon’s for a little?” she asks, cocking her head to the side before shimming closer to you. “i have to get railed so bad.”

“jesus christ, eunbi,” you snort, pushing her away again and burying your face in the pillow - you’ve never met someone who overshares as much as she does.

she plops down on her back with an unabashed giggle, popping right back up like an annoying little dog and looking at you with a smile.

“of course you can go, i’m not gonna hold you hostage here,” you say when she pulls your face away, looking at you so expectantly and sweetly, you couldn’t say no if you wanted.

“okay, but i don’t want you thinking that i’m gonna ditch you this whole time. i’m really not, y/n,” she pouts, knowing that was one of the reasons you were apprehensive about coming - that and her bitch of a mother. “i just miss him.”

a pout falls on your face as you look at eunbi and the genuine look on her face.

“bi, i’m serious, go. i want you to,” you insist, moving a piece of her tangled hair away from her face. “we were just gonna be up here anyway. i’ll probably take a nap, i was about to fall asleep before your loud ass-”

“thank you, thank you, thank you,” she says, pulling you into a tight hug before jumping off her bed and rushing toward her door. “i’ll be back a lot more calm and happy. oh, why, you ask? because i’m about to get my back blown the fuck ou-”

you thank god for your impeccable aim, promptly whacking eunbi in the face with one of her pillows.

“get out of here,” you groan, eunbi throwing the pillow back with a smile on her face.

“sweet dreams, y/n!”

you let out a sigh when she closes her door, falling back onto her bed with a soft plop.

you were definitely tired from your anxious pacing this morning but aren’t sure how much sleep you’re gonna get right now, tonight or for the rest of the month.

knowing that you’re unwelcomed by one person, extremely attracted to another and silently betraying the person you should be most loyal too - but as long as it just stays in your head, and you remind yourself that there’s no way mr. park could feel anything back to you, it’ll be fine.

you’ll just get by quietly and smoothly at dinners or in passing through the hallways, enjoy eunbi’s comfortable king-sized bed and the fact that you don’t have to spend yet another holiday alone.

reruns of drake and josh play in the background, keeping your giggles quiet as drake soaks his feet in lizard pee. you feel your eyes grow heavy the more episodes you watch, the shitty laugh track and loud, bickering brothers eventually lulling you to sleep.

it takes about five knocks on the door to eventually stir you, your eyes fluttering open to see mr park’s figure in the doorway. you can only stare at the man as you adjust to him, taking in his tall, slim figure just a few feet away from you.

taking in the way his white shirt clings to his body, broad shoulders and slim torso on display in a way that makes you wish you could see, just for a second, what he looks like underneath that a-

“sorry if i woke you,” his deep voice hums, the slightest bit of amusement in his voice that causes your cheeks to warm. “i didn’t think you’d be sleeping at seven p.m.”

“no, it’s okay,” you stammer out, sitting up in eunbi’s bed. “i... i don’t even know when i fell asleep, to be honest.”

he looks at the screen to see drake and josh playing, a smirk pulling at his lips as his gaze shifts back to you.

“it’s funny,” you defend with a mumble, a deep chuckle leaving his mouth that causes butterflies to erupt in your stomach - he’s far too handsome, everything about him is just far too attractive, even in his laugh.

“that’s what eunbi claims,” he says, remembering all the years of his daughter forcing him to watch ridiculous shows.

despite his daughter’s outgoing nature, she never had a lot of friends growing up.

there was once a small group of girls she hung out but they quickly drifted apart throughout high school, leaving eunbi really only with him and her boyfriend.

the boyfriend who seonghwa really didn’t wanna like out of principal but seeing that the kid really does love his daughter quickly coming around.

“speaking of, where is she? jiwoon’s?”

“yeah,” you tell him, settling back into the pillows and stretching your arms out in front of you. “she said she’d be back for dinner.”

“well she’s wrong, as usual, because dinner’s ready,” he quips playfully, the smirk pulling at his lips causing you to smile back at him. you swallow nervously when his eyes roam over your face, your own gaze trained on him before you see his mouth start to move again.

“do you want me to bring some up for you? or you’ll come down?”

he can see the apprehension on your face immediately, fear crossing your eyes and your arms folding into each other uncomfortably. he tries to ignores the way your soft white sweater dips by your chest, a hint of perky cleavage just barely showing that causes his dick to twitch in his pants.

he doesn’t know when this happened.

he didn’t know when he became a pervy old man who checked out college girls with his wife just downstairs and the knowledge that you’re his daughter’s friend.

“i’ll come down,” you say, surprising him just as he was about to insist he brings some up for you. “she’ll probably be back soon anyway.”

but five minutes pass by, then ten, then twenty and eunbi’s still not home - it’s just you, seonghwa and mrs. park at the long, glass dining room table.

white chairs with high backs and comfortable cushions to match the immaculate, hospital-like color scheme and environment; truthfully, you’ve never been more terrified to eat a plate of chicken parmesan in your life.

the sound of utensils scraping on the china and the crackling of the fireplace a room over are the only noises heard throughout the home, mrs. park taking a swig of wine and gently placing it on the table with a light clack.

“so, y/n,” she finally says, breaking the tension with her rich-sounding, nasally voice. “how has school been, dear? you’re an... art major, am i remembering that correctly?”

“uh, photography, yeah,” you smile tensely, trying to ignore the judgment in her voice.

“ah, so you never switched over to business then,” she hums, her wine glass back in hand as her dark, gorgeous eyes look you over.

you bite the inside of your cheek as you feel a pink flush cover your face, faintly remembering your roommate saving you a few semesters ago when her mom was grilling you about picking a more practical and useful major.

“she can do whatever she wants, mom,” eunbi eventually snapped, “whether she does business or photography or even liberal arts is none of your business.”

“no,” you mutter out, dropping your gaze to look over the intricate pattern on the table. “i thought about it but it wasn’t something i wanted.”

“so you didn’t want something practical? or useful?” she asks, using those two words yet again while cocking her head to the side with a perfectly plucked eyebrow.

“a business degree would’ve been great, y/n. everyone always has connections to somewhere, you could’ve found a job right out of college.”

you bite back the urge to tell her no. that not everyone has connections to multi billion dollar companies or numbers of ceos in their phones or the ceo of a tech company as their next door neighbors.

but instead, the same way eunbi defended you against her mother, seonghwa does against his wife. gives you a soft, sympathetic side eye before placing his larger hand on his wife’s.

“there are tons of jobs in photography too, honey,” seonghwa says, his voice so warm and soft and welcoming compared to hers even despite the slight edge in it.

“and she can travel to build her portfolio. it’s a fantastic opportunity to explore the world and make money. is there a particular type of photography you’d wanna do?”

you feel yourself relax slightly, a small smile on your face as you nod your head toward the striking couple.

“i would love to be a wedding photographer actually,” you mumble, a romantic at heart who’s read and watched far too many novels and romcoms.

“taking pictures of all those moments would be really fun, i think. like when the groom sees the bride for the first time or just everyone dancing and having fun. weddings are usually happy and i like to photography happy things.”

“that sounds perfect for you then,” seonghwa smiles, his brown eyes lighting up and making you feel even more at ease.

“i think you’ll do great, y/n. and you only have a semester left, right? maybe you and eunbi you could travel for the summer before you start your jobs.”

you ignore the swish of dread and anxiety in your stomach at the mention of next semester, instead choosing to smile softly and nod your head at the man.

“i think she’d love that,” you giggle out, knowing damn well your roommate already has an extensive list of cities she wants to visit before ‘real life begins.’

“and how do your parents feel about everything?” mrs. park asks, making your stomach twist with even more dread and discomfort. “are they proud?”

you wish you could fold in on yourself right now, swallowing the growing, nervous lump in your throat.

because not only is she making you incredibly uncomfortable right now, with her harsh looks and topic of conversation and snide little tone, she just mentioned the people you haven’t spoken to since you left home at eighteen.

you don’t know what to say, you have the slightest bit of concern you might throw up on her, when the loud, chipper voice of your roommate floats through the cold, silent house.

“i’m back!” her chipper voice yelps, sock-clad feet running through the house and sliding on the marble floor. “what’d you guys make?”

“you’re late, eunbi,” seonghwa mumbles warningly, an innocent smile on her face as she picks up her plate of food and plops down next to you.

“am i? or are you girls just early?”

“i’m not a girl.”

“it’s a figure of speech, father,” eunbi says, smiling playfully at her father before turning to you.

she’s able to tell the second she sees your face that you’re uncomfortable, the pink flush still lingering on your face and the tenseness of your shoulders making her frown.

“i’m sorry you were alone with them,” she whispers, genuine sorrow in her wide, mock-innocent eyes. “i got held up. or... down, rather, but i tried to leave on time. i promise.”

“uh huh, i bet,” you mumble back, fighting back a smile despite your discomfort.

because eunbi has always had something about her that made it impossible to stay mad at her, her carefree, unfiltered way of communicating that made being her friend so easy.

even if, sometimes, you wanted to kill her.

“so mom,” eunbi quips, turning her soft gaze to you before looking over her mother.

“what was with your little group of bitchy housewives today? you couldn’t have had them over any other day? what kind of christmas disgrace is that?”

“eunbi...” seonghwa chastises lowly, the girl with her brow already quirked and eyes narrowed.

“i can do whatever i want in my home, eunbi. are you forgetting how things work around here?”

“how could i, when i’m met with thirty middle-aged women with botox out the ass in my home the second i get back from school?” she asks, “you didn’t think me and y/n would wanna spend the break, like, resting?”

“you ran off to your boyfriend’s the second you got here,” mrs. park bites back, her glass of wine empty as she pinches the bridge of her nose. “left your friend all alone in your room. what did i tell you about leaving... guests unattended in the house?”

the accusation and direction of conversation is quickly making you feel uncomfortable, your head turned down in your lap and leaving your cheeks aflame.

she’s making it sound like you would steal something in her home for christ’s sake, like you’re not a guest who’s dreaded coming here due to this very reason.

you block out the back and forth between eunbi and her mom, a few more seconds of yappy feminine voices before a deeply spoken “enough,” echoes through the dining room.

you even look up at the sound, watching as mr. park’s eyes rest on you. his eyes narrow as he takes in the sight of your red cheeks, his gaze shifting from you to his daughter to his wife beside him.

“y/n’s here for a month and we’re gonna make her feel welcomed the entire time. if you two are gonna fight, don’t do it at the dinner table.”

“but dad, she totally-”

“maybe you should’ve taught your daughter-”

“no more,” seonghwa growls, a sense of finality in his tone that causes the room to go silent.

you can tell your friend is unbothered by the reprimanding, shoveling food into her mouth and sipping from her wine glass completely unbothered.

sometimes you wish you could be more like her, so unfazed by conflict or loud voices or the strained relationship with a parent.

eunbi was always open with you about the rocky relationship with her mother, saying more than once to you that if it weren’t for her father, she would’ve long cut off any contact with her.

she had never really been there for eunbi growing up, having nannies and chefs take care of her for most of her life - it was her nanny of fifteen years who taught her how to walk and talk, was there with her for all the milestones she met through infancy, childhood and even adolescence.

but even then, eunbi was nonchalant and carefree about it.

saying that she’s not gonna waste her time being upset over it when she knows her mom doesn’t think about her at all. it makes your heart hurt for eunbi, grateful that the girl at least has a good relationship with her father and boyfriend.

and you, of course. you consider her your best friend and you know she does the same - even if sometimes, you wanna pull her hair out.

“i’m gonna go the food store tomorrow, eunbi, so if you and y/n want anything, just text it to me.”

“oooh can we come!” she squeals, knocking her arm into yours like an excited kid in a candy store. “we wanna try making our cookies again.”

“you’re gonna bake?” the girl’s father asks, a look of doubt on his face that causes you to bite back a smile.

“no, we’re gonna bake,” she corrects with snark, “y/n measures the ingredients and stirs, i put it in the oven and watch.”

“right, silly me,” the man hums, a smirk pulling at his lips the more he sees his daughter get irritated. “but of course you girls can come,” he says, his eyes flicking to you for just a few seconds too long.

you can only look back with a small smile, a quiet “thank you,” leaving your mouth that you’re positive he doesn’t catch.

(he did).

you help clean your plate off before you and eunbi go up to her room later that night, once her door’s closed and she’s sitting down shooting her a look of disdain.

“i know you’re mad, okay, i’m sorry, i really am!” she whines, holding her arms out for you to come over. “i tried to leave but he wouldn’t let me. he just kept wanting to-”

“i don’t need the details you sick freak!” you yelp, going over and plopping down on her bed. “ugh, it was just... so awkward. your mom hates me. she was utterly perturbed that i didn’t switch my major to business.”

“ugh, she’s a crotchety bitch i swear,” eunbi says, falling onto her back and looking at you with sorrow in her eyes. “i’m sorry, i really am. i won’t leave you alone with her again, i promise.”

you quirk an unconvinced eyebrow her way, eyes full of doubt and distrust before she throws herself on you and squeals that, at least, now you can have a scary movie marathon without any interruptions.

it seems you also probably should’ve made her promise last night that you’d never be alone with her father either; it didn’t even occur to you at the time, not thinking that she’d really ditch you two days in a row.

but alas, jiwoon’s car pulled up when all three of you were walking out of the house to the g-wagon for the trip to the food store, her shooting you an apologetic look and whispered condolences in your ear.

“i’m technically not breaking my promise because my dad’s nice,” she mumbled, the feeling in your body more nervous and aroused than it is angry and upset.

but she could’t know that.

“and when i break your head? then what, eunbi?”

“i love you,” she giggles in your ear, the playful tone of your voice letting her know she got off the hook again. “it’ll be fine. my dad’s a good man. he wouldn’t ever talk shit to you the way my mom does.”

little does she know how much you want her dad to talk shit to you.

talk to you in a way that’s casual and playful and teasing, like the hints of it you’ve seen in the car or in eunbi’s room when you were alone last night. you just want him to look at you with the slightest bit of something, even though it’s wrong.

not only because of his wife, no matter how big a bitch she is, but because of-

“do you still wanna come with me?”

seonghwa’s voice pulls you away from your thoughts, looking to the man dressed in a long, black jacket and expensive loafers. he looks far too fancy and delectable for a trip to the grocery store.

eunbi is long gone by now, her giggles and carefree run down the driveway and into her boyfriend’s car leaving you and mr. park alone, with only the blue sky and crisp air as your witness.

him looking you over hopefully, with a twinge of teasing and longing in his gaze.

you looking at him full of nerves and excitement, biting down on your lip as you nod your head timidly.

“s-sure, if that’s okay,” you say, looking from him to his car just a few feet away. “it’d be better than sitting in eunbi’s room again.”

a handsome smile crosses his face as he nods his head, heart pounding and throat constricting as you watch him walk toward the car.

he walks around the front of a smaller, sleek suv, your own eyes watching in confusion until he opens the passenger side door.

you can only stare blankly, head cocked to the side as you really start to wonder if this man is about to make you drive his car costing more than your life.

“are you getting in, y/n?” he asks, an amused smile pulling at his lips - almost like he’s making fun of your nervous, intimidated disposition.

you shake your head of the confusion, cheeks flushing in the cold december air as you do an awkward jog toward the car. you dip in beside him as your body hits the cool leather, craning your neck to shoot him a small, grateful smile.

your faces are closer than you anticipated, breath catching in your throat as his gaze watches you closely.

he doesn’t say a word or move a muscle, taking a few moments for his eyes to roam your face and body before mumbling to buckle up.

you wish you knew how long the drive to the store would be, as it would slightly settle you and the thick, awkward tension in the air. it appears to be enough time for the heat to go on, warm air blowing from the vents before he asks if you want your seat heater on.

“oh, sure, thank you,” you mumble, a smile quirking on his lips as he presses down on the small circular button.

more silence lingers in the air as the trees outside you pass by, the bright winter sun and blue sky not making it feel like christmas is only a few days away.

you can’t remember the last time the holidays have actually felt like it, though,  all the lonely days blending into one and feeling as if they were the same.

maybe this year, because you’re surrounded by eunbi and her family, it’ll feel less lonely. maybe you’ll actually enjoy yourself and find that you’ve missed out when you denied her invitation each and every-

“i’m sorry about my wife last night.”

those are words you don’t expect so they shock you even more, looking at the older man beside you with a wide-eyed, confused gaze. his dark eyes are expressionless and casual on the road, one hand on the wheel while the other rests beside him.

“i... what do you mean?” you ask, knowing damn well you understand his apology - and given the unamused look he throws you, he knows you’re full of shit too.

“i don’t think she means to judge you so harshly,” he begins, his deep, smooth voice full of sympathy and softness. “it’s not her place to question your education or major, so i just want to apologize for her.”

“that’s not necessary, mr. park,” you insist, shaking your head as a small, breathy chuckle leaves you. “and it’s not like i haven’t heard it before.”

because no one is ever too confident in any of the arts being your main source of income or profession; even your own parents, although it really wouldn’t matter what you would have chosen, haven’t been supportive.

and you especially haven’t missed the looks of pity or distaste when you tell people on campus or at parties in the frat house, future business leaders or stem majors looking at you like just said the sky is hot pink.  

“well that’s just ridiculous,” seonghwa says, ripping you from your thoughts so you can roam over his strong, handsome face. “it’s a great field to work in and something you’re passionate about. that’s what matters most.”

he can tell by the way your cheeks flush that you’re slightly embarrassed and he can’t help but find it endearing, licking over his lips as his mind begins to wander.

wonder about what other parts of you could flush so easily or what else he could say to really make the pinkness deepen.

“i guess,” you mutter, shrugging your shoulders as you look at the passing oak trees and mansions.

“and... what you said last night about traveling to build my portfolio,” you begin, shocked by the words continuing to leave your mouth. “that’s something i’ve thought about doing. i think it’d be really fun, regardless if i did wedding photographer or not.”

“yeah?” he asks, the smile on his face causing your head to jump. “i think that’d be good, too. where would you wanna go first?”

your lips purse to the side as you think it over, a love for traveling anywhere you could but having an especially strong pull toward the tropics.

“cancun or the maldives,” you answer, the financial aspect of the trip leaving it most likely impossible for you. “it’ll probably never happen, because i’d have to sell my first born, but i’ve always wanted to go somewhere like that. somewhere tropical and fun.”

seonghwa bites his tongue about his multiple trips there, instead letting out a chuckle that causes butterflies to erupt. his eyes are too drawn to your body in the front seat, legs crossed and arms over your lap politely.

“you never know,” he hums, ripping his gaze away before you catch his gawking. “you might get there one day, after being the best wedding photographer the city has to offer.”

“oh, please,” you glggle out, cheeks flushing despite the absurdity of the comment.

you catch the smile that creeps on his face, the same handsome, carefree smile you saw in the car last time.

you try not to let it get to you, let your brain convince you that maybe he likes hanging out with you alone as much as you like it too.

“i’m serious,” he says, the earnest tone of his voice slipping into dad mode in a way he doesn’t even realize. “your parents must be proud.”

you bite down on your lip as you let out a soft, almost scornful, chuckle, a quietly mumbled “yeah,” leaving your mouth that causes his eyebrows to pull together.

he always thought it was a little suspicious that in the four years eunbi has known you, she’s never told him about your parents; as far as he knows, she’s never even seen them.

“she has her scholarship and stuff so she doesn’t really need them,” his daughter said one day, the two of them discussing why you were spending yet another break alone in the apartment.

“but they don’t want her home for the holidays? you told her she was welcomed, right?”

“ugh, about a thousand times,” his daughter groans in the seat, throwing herself against the window dramatically. “i basically begged her, dad, but she said she didn’t wanna intrude. i’m telling you it’s because mom is the biggest fucking-”

“eunbi...”

“you know it’s true!” she squeals, seonghwa biting his tongue in an effort to be the bigger and better parent. “i don’t even know why you guys got married.”

but that’s what happens with teen pregnancies and rich families. how they were destined to marry anyway, due to their parents companies and stupid business politics.

it was one drunken night at his dad’s company party and a broken condom that sealed his fate with finality - made him go from a single, carefree high school student to a married businessman with a child just two short years later.

his wife was good at one point he likes to think, remembering she was gorgeous and sassy and not like the other girls who would drop to their knees for him.

but marriage and a child and just life quickly caught up with them, already trapped in a loveless, pointless marriage by the time he hit 25.

he’d be lying if he said he didn’t stay for eunbi, that they both didn’t stay for eunbi throughout her childhood and now just grew too used to being an unhappy married couple who live separate lives.  

there was never any reason for them to divorce though, no one serious in his or his wife’s lives and the hassle of money and disputing houses and cars and assets far too draining.

“i don’t believe i’ve ever met them,” seonghwa says, pulling into the store parking lot to see it’s less crowded than he suspected it’d be. “what do they do?”

you couldn’t imagine anything more unbearable than disclosing to your friend’s hot dad who you may or may not have feelings for about the messed up relationship with your parents.

it just screams daddy issues, which might say a lot about your very attraction to him in the first place.

“they run a little restaurant back in my home town. it’s about three hours from campus, which is why i don’t really go home for breaks.”

seonghwa hums lowly, nodding his head as he looks at you at a stop sign.

you’re unnerved by the way his eyes roam you, like he can see signs of you being uncomfortable about your parents and wants to know why - but why would he care? you’re only his daughter’s roommate.

“do you miss seeing them?”

you lick over your lips nervously, watching as his eyes darken every so slightly.

he watches each and every of your movements carefully, so in tune with your reactions and breaths you can just feel yourself getting more and more worked up.

not in the slightest, you wanna say. i’ll probably never see them again and have no qualms about it, mr. park.

“i suppose,” you mutter, shrugging your shoulders as you apprehensively meet his gaze.

“you suppose?” he asks, concern etched on his face. “when was the time you’ve seen them? since your freshmen year?”

you avert your gaze as your teeth sink into your bottom lip, in no way wanting to have this discussion at ten a.m. when, much to your pleasure, an impatient car behind beeps at seonghwa’s mercedes.

his dark eyes move to the rearview mirror, narrowed and irritated in a way you can’t help but think is sexy, before he puts his foot off the break and turns into the parking lot.

“i think this person’s leaving,” you mutter when you notice another car go in reverse, seonghwa snatching the spot before the impatient, crotchety lady behind him could steal it.

you can’t help but smirk as seonghwa eyes her when you get out of the car, giving him a look that’s half judgmental and half amused.

“what? she beeped at me.”

“aren’t you supposed to be, like, an adult?”

he rolls his eyes as he takes a cart from the pile, nodding his head for you to go in front and “stop talking back to an elder.”

you can’t help but smirk at his playfulness, taking your spot in the front and pretending as if you always move your hips this much when you walk casually; you would’ve felt embarrassed, had you not turned around a few moments later to see his eyes already on you.

“where to first, mr. park?”

he has to bite back the groan threatening to leave his mouth, reminding himself to keep himself in check this month - starting tomorrow.

“depends, y/n,” he hums, voice far too deep and sultry to be surrounded by innocent bystanders in the grocery store. “what do you want?”

words are caught in your throat and you can only stare dumbly, your plan quickly back firing as he appears to do the same - but it’s gotta be in your head, right?

regardless, it quickly humbles you in the form of a small, unsure shrug.

it’s how you two start walking up and down the aisles, seonghwa putting in what he remembers and items on his mental list while also insisting you put in anything you want.

your arms bump ever so often, softly apologizing and acknowledging it the first few times before you both realize it may be happening on purpose.

you stick close to him when the aisles get tight and crowded, his deep voice telling you to “go ahead,” causing you to swallow shakily. you feel the presence of his hand just a few inches from your hips, lingering and hovering but never fully touching.

it’s finally when you’re in the bread aisle, seonghwa a few feet away talking to the man at the bakery counter, that you decide to put something in the cart.

you would usually never accept someone’s offer to buy you something, already feeling bad about staying with them rent free and eating their meals without compensating.

but the brioche loaf brand is one of your favorites, only sold on occasion at the corner store near campus.

you press up on your tippy toes to grab the bag of bread, stretching your arm up with all your might. the plastic slips through your fingers just as you’re about to snatch it down, letting out an annoyed huff as you pulled down your sweater dress.

you mumble your annoyances before trying again, back on the tips of your toes with your arm raising when you feel a hand on the small of your back.

it’s large and warm and seeping through the thin material of your burgundy dress, a snappy protest about to leave your mouth when you catch mr. park’s face in your peripheral.

there’s a content look on his face as he takes the bag with ease, holding it above your head as his hand moves from your back to your waist with a gentle touch.

you look at him with wide eyes and a pounding heart, his hand on your waist so foreign and strange but... good. something you didn’t even realize you’d been craving until it happened.

the strength and warmth of his hand, though if you think about it just enough, you can feel the weight of his wedding band through the fabric.

“is this what you wanted?”

his voice is deep and low as he speaks to you and you alone, your eyes raising to see him staring down at you. you can’t make out the expression in them, just the darkness in his eyes and the frantic beating of your heart.

you can’t even being to understand the context of his words right now because, yes, this is exactly what you’ve wanted - but he doesn’t know that, right?

“w-what?”

he can’t help the smirk that crosses his face, all sorts of pride and satisfaction and arousal coursing through his veins at your current disposition.

“the bread,” he says, stepping back and holding it out to you. “is this the one you wanted?”

your eyes narrow as you look at him, the smirk on his face, the amusement in his gaze, the playfulness that’s radiating off him - is he fucking with you?

“oh... i... yes,” you finally say, coming to your senses and not allowing yourself to think this way anymore. “that’s the one. i hope it’s okay.”

“of course,” he hums, placing the bread in the cart before going back to the front handles. “you can get anything you want, i already told you that.”

you nod dumbly as you follow beside him, seonghwa picking more things off the shelves and muttering the list to himself as you try to get your shit together.

because yes, you’re attracted to him and yes, you’ve found yourself alone with him for more than two days in a row and yes, there’s been some lingering looks and touches but that doesn’t mean anything.

you can’t let your own deluded thoughts and desires get in the way of reality.

the reality that he’s your friend and roommate’s married father and you’re a college student. he doesn’t want you just as much as you shouldn’t want him so what’s the problem here?

maybe it’s that you’re a 22-year-old woman who’s only been on a handful of dates.

that the last time you made out with someone was when you were drunk and dared to kiss the first guy that walked through the bar (luckily, somewhat attractive and surprisingly polite).

that, maybe, you’re so horribly touch-starved and aching for affection, you’re trying to find it in a hot father figure who’s just as kind as he sexy - and that, you think, is the second most tragic thing here.

because the first would absolutely be thinking that any of this, any of these stares or touches or coincidences of eunbi leaving you two alone, means something.

means that maybe this break is for you two is create an attraction and build some sort of bond and-

“y/n.”

you’re barely able to register seonghwa’s voice before his arm is wrapped around your waist, pulling your body into his taller one and having you pressed up right against him.

you were so lost in thought of him that you didn’t see the older women skirting her cart around the aisle quickly, phone pressed to her ear as she yells to her husband about the christmas ham.

you’re not even sure if she shoots you a look of sorrow or utters any apology, too consumed and distracted by the feeling and proximity of mr. park.

his arm wrapped around you, your body pressed flush up against him, his neck craned down to look at you with a building... something in his eyes. playfulness and teasing but also something darker, something that makes your stomach swoop and renders you unable to move.

“are you always so clumsy and distracted?” he mumbles lowly, his deep voice quiet for only you two to hear - like he knows even in a sea of strangers, he has to keep these interactions quiet.

“what would you do if i wasn’t here to help you, y/n?”

i wouldn’t have been distracted in the first place, you’re tempted to say - but you certainly don’t wanna open that can of worms, especially not in the middle of this grocery store with the way your heart is pounding.

“i... i’m sorry, i was distracted,” you mutter, playing up the damsel in distress just a little bit. “my mistake, mr. park.”

he licks over his lips, swearing his name just being spoken has never effected him like this. he doesn’t even know where this attraction came from, seeing you leave the dorm building yesterday morning and something in his body jumping at the sight of you.

maybe it’s just showing how unhappy he really is with his life, living day to day to just work. hang out with his friends and go to sleep alone - he doesn’t remember the last time his wife touched him, looked at him like she wanted him or made any move to be with him.

he just knows that you showed up, looking so pretty and wide-eyed and coy, and is now about to lose his mind.

“it’s alright,” he says, hoping you don’t hear the thick tension he hears in his own voice, like he’s some idiotic, hormonal young boy. “i think we only have a few more aisles left, anyway.”

he plucks the remaining items off the shelves before you both make your way to the self check-out, him scanning and you bagging because “eunbi says if my career as a photographer fails, i could be the best grocery bagger ever.”

“that’s just because she puts the bread on the bottom,” seonghwa mutters, a smile on your face as you nod your head - she squished one too many of your brioche loafs before you realized bagging just wasn’t for her.

your fingers graze ever so often, the coldness of his tips a stark contrast to your warmer ones.

a particularly big, bulk bag of vegetables proves to be a challenge for you, working through the packed bag with some difficulty. you let out an annoyed groan as you play a dangerous game of tetris, trying not to rip open the brown paper bag.

you finally get the box inside, a little bit prouder than you care to admit, when your precious brioche loaf is dropped right atop. you look up at seonghwa to see him already apologizing, your brow raised as you look at the older man in confusion.

did he think your hand was out? why would he just throw the food at you?

but it’s only when you feel a little more air than normal on your chest that you see what could’ve possibly caused the distraction, the white lace from your bra sticking out.

your cleavage in this dress was hidden for the most part, only becoming a little more obvious when you moved around or packed a shitload of groceries. it makes you bite back a smirk as you put two and two together, looking up to see his eyes still lingering over you.

two can play at this game mr. park.

“mr. park,” you begin, feigning a certain kind of innocence as you place your bread atop the other groceries and finally look up at him. “are you always so clumsy?”

it takes a few seconds for a smile to pull at his lips, the tick in his jaw not going unnoticed to you - so maybe this wasn’t all in your head. maybe he wants you too... possibly.

“you’re funny, y/n,” he mumbles, a smile pulling at your lips as he takes out his black card. “i guess i was distracted, too.”

you swallow the lump in your throat as you feel the slightest hint of arousal run through you, shaking it off and letting out a forced, girlish chuckle.

you pack the car a few minutes later without any lingering eyes or touches, seonghwa telling you about the meals they plan on cooking for christmas.

they usually don’t make their own food for holidays but decided to have a more traditional set up for you and eunbi’s arrival - he also hasn’t cooked a meal for his family in god knows how long.

“that’ll be great, thank you,” you tell him, clicking your seatbelt in as he backs out the spot. “i’m kind of a picky eater but i’ll eat anything you guys provide me.”

“and you have the whole brioche loaf,” seonghwa says, a giggle leaving your mouth as you nod your head.

“true. it’s really good.”

“i’ve never tried, perhaps you’d be willing to-”

his wife’s name popping up on his car dashboard acts as a way to bring you back to reality, brings a certain kind of silence over the both of you for a few seconds.

like he wasn’t just rubbing his body against yours and you weren’t just flirting with him in the form of smirking lips and snarky comments.

you watch a twinge of annoyance behind seonghwa’s eyes, gaze roaming over the screen as if he’s in contemplation before muttering “one second.”

“hello?”

“where are you?” her voice snaps in annoyance, “i told you we had that board meeting at one.”

“and it’s only noon,” his deep voice mumbles, not matching her level of irritation but sounding a whole lot different than a few seconds ago. “me and y/n are coming back now.”

“y/n?” she spats, like it’s a disgusting piece of food she wouldn’t dare put in her mouth. “what about eunbi?”

“she went off with jiwoon before i could get her in the car.”

“so it was only you two?” she asks, the snide judgment and underlying tone in her voice causing your stomach to churn. “did she ask you to buy a bunch of-”

“i’ll be home in twenty and then be on my way over,” he says, cutting her off and hanging up before she can even get another word you.

your stomach churns and a sick feeling comes over you, her utter dislike and disdain for you causing you to bite your lip.

because not only does she not like you to be with her daughter, she doesn’t want you with her husband (although, you suppose, you can’t really blame her for that one).

“i’m sorry about that,” seonghwa winces, the silence lingering between you two heavy. “you could’ve gotten anything you wanted, y/n. this is your christmas too. don’t feel bad about anything, okay?”

you swallow the lump in your throat, your gaze moving to his as he stops at the red light.

your eyes lingering over his and his doing the very same, hand twitching to reach out and move the piece of hair from your slightly flushed face.

and there was something about the way you were both looking at each other, eyes so focused and unwavering and honest, that had you thinking maybe all of this wasn’t in your heads.

but it didn’t mean either of you could act on it - they were just... feelings of lust and wonder and all things forbidden, not seriously believing that a relationship like this could unfold right under the nose of his wife, his daughter and your roommate.

unless the pull was so desperate.

so overwhelming and all-consuming and present between the both of you, little moments couldn’t help but happen.

strike one:

with none other than eunbi as a distraction, the girl promising she wasn’t gonna leave you alone anymore, you were able to take your mind off everything.

the tension-filled, heart pounding moments with mr. park that felt just as wrong as they did right.

you spent a few nights going out with her, jiwoon and all of their high school friends, a surprisingly nice group of young adults who you got along well with.

they were loud and crazy and did far too many shots but they also seemed to be genuinely kind. even the boy who was flirting with you all night, handsome and tall with pretty dark eyes, acted as a good distraction.

grinding up against him as the music pounded throughout the bar, alcohol coursing through your veins allowing you to forget about the older man who’s been living in your head for almost a week now.

“how have i never met you before, y/n?” the boy mumbled lowly in your ear, your head against his shoulder carelessly.

but it was right there in that moment, him saying your name, that the moment was over.

because it just didn’t sound like seonghwa, as delusional as that was.

it didn’t get your heart racing or lips quirking the same way it did when you heard the older man say it. the smile attached to his handsome, mature face and the deep, lowly spoken tone that always held a hint of teasing and sincerity.

“but danny really is so freakin’ nice!” eunbi squeals to you on christmas eve, the two of you in her immaculately white and modern kitchen prepping the chocolate chip cookie cough for tomorrow.

“and you two seemed to be getting along, i saw your ass all up on him.”

“eunbi, that wasn’t me. that was the vodka. i don’t know who that girl was.”

she throws her head back as a loud chuckle leaves her, telling you again that she warned you her snobby, rich little friends have been able to handle their liquor since middle school.

it’s how they cope, she had said, unloved kids with more money than god learning to deal with the world of limitless funds and minimal parental supervision.

“well he hasn’t stopped asking me about you, you know,” she hums, her eyebrows quirked suggestively as she mixes the bowl of ingredients lazily.

“and not just because of your newfound grinding skills, which by the way, are usually learned by the tenth grade.”

your eyes narrow at her comment, throwing a small ball of dough at her that she, impressively, catches in her mouth.

“he really is just, like, so taken by you, y/n. seriously. i told him that you’re graduating this year with a degree in photography and he nearly came in his pants. he loves the artsy girls.”

“you are so vile,” you snort out, shaking your head at the girl sitting criss-crossed on the counter. “and stop saying that. we both know i’m not graduating this year,” you mumble, her face falling pathetically.

“i told you we’re gonna find a way,” she whines lowly, looking at you with all kinds of sympathy and sadness in her eyes - she would offer to pay for you, if she didn’t think you would smack her upside the head.

“oh and what? is my new boyfriend danny gonna do that for me?”

“in exchange for more grinding and a photoshoot, i think. do you want me to try?”

she lets out another giggle despite the way you pinch her leg, peeking inside the bowl with a surprising amount of pride.

"this looks good,” you mumble, swiping your finger to collect some of the chocolate dough.

“hey!” she whines brattily, thrusting a spoon toward your hand just a second too late.  

“why are you whining in here like a child, eunbi?” seonghwa asks, walking through the entryway and the large, white island in the center. “what are you making? please don’t burn the house down.”

“haha dad, you’re so funny,” she mocks sarcastically, jumping down from the counter with her hands on her hips. “where are the baking sheets?”

a simple shrug from her father causes her to roll her eyes, grumbling about how she was really trying to avoid her bitch of a mother today. he holds back his smirk, about to reprimand her before she’s out the kitchen and shouting for her mother upstairs.

it’s only you and seonghwa in the kitchen now, a heavy silence in the air as you stand there dumbly - bowl beside you, cookie dough adorning the top of your finger.

“what are you girls making?” he finally asks, his body moving closer and closer causing you to swallow.

“i... uh, cookie dough. for tomorrow,” you say, lifting your finger and wiggling the tip full of batter. “chocolate chip.”

his eyes move to your finger before grazing over your mouth, his tongue peeking out ever so slightly as he reminds himself to act right.

he hasn’t been alone with you since that day at the food store, just seeing you in passing in the hallways or outside the house as you and eunbi went to and fro.

he hears your giggles at night and tired groans in the morning, quietly yelling at his daughter to wake up and get her ass out of bed.

and he knows it’s probably for the better, that you two don’t find yourselves alone with each other, but he can’t help but feel a rush of excitement right now.

you watch as he moves closer, with the same wide-eyed look you’ve been giving him since he first saw you in your apartment weeks ago.

“ahh, you’re making it from scratch? that’s ambitious.”

“yeah, we googled a recipe,” you tell him, finger still beside you in the air.

you don’t know what causes you to be so bold, maybe him attempting to carry out a normal conversation even though he’s looking at you with so much lust and desire, but you can’t stop once you start.

“how’s it taste?” he asks, his voice deep and slightly strained as he nods his head toward your finger.

you don’t even bat an eye as you slip the tip of your finger in your mouth slowly, swirling your tongue around as you take up all the dough on your skin.

it’s sweeter than you originally thought it’d be but it tastes good nonetheless, keeping your eyes on him as you reamin as innocent and unassuming as possible.

“it’s good,” you say, dropping your finger like you didn’t just make a show of licking and sucking it. “i like it better raw.”

you don’t even realize your words until you see the fleeting look on his face, tongue swiping across his lip and eyes hardening. they roam you so slowly and darkly, you can’t control the growing butterflies and swooping in your lower stomach.

“mm, me too,” he hums lowly, the hardening of his cock in his pants something he hasn’t felt in forever. it’s taking everything in him to control himself, from his eyes popping out of his head to letting out the deepest of growls in the back of his throat.

“do you want some?” you ask, cocking your head to the side questioningly.

he has to desperately hold on to his composure, not think about how easy it’d be to pin you against the cabinet right behind you. take just a few steps closer, have your back against the cold granite and let you feel just how much he wants some.

but he has to play it cool, push down these building desires and ignore your teasing because he’s almost fucking positive that’s what’s happening here.

“want some what?” he asks, his voice lowering just a tad.

he hasn’t played a game like this since college, watching as your eyes widen and brow quirks up.

but he sees that’s exactly what it is when you turn around and face the bowl of cookie dough to him, a smile just as sweet as the cookies on your face.

“cookie dough. before we put them in the oven and possibly burn them.”

the breathy chuckle he lets out leaves your stomach in shambles, his tongue peeking out and poking the inside of his cheek causing a swooping sensation to flood through you.

but before he can even think to say anything, before your eyes can look over his body and make you feel even more warm and bothered, eunbi floats back in and fiddles in the cabinets for the baking sheets.

“that woman is too much, i swear,” she grunts, whipping out the materials quickly before her head snaps to her father. “why are you still here?”

“i wanted some cookies. and to ensure y/n won’t allow you do burn down the kitchen.”

“it was one time, dad, and an accident. how many times do i have to defend myself in this house?”

you let out a giggle as you look from eunbi to seonghwa, your roommate turning her back to set up the practice baking session.

“let’s go bitch! i hope we didn’t fuck this up.”

seonghwa’s eyes roam over you for a few more moments, his tongue swiping across his lips before, finally, leaving the kitchen with his dick hard as a rock.

strike two:

christmas consisted of successful cookies per your and eunbi’s homemade batch, passive aggressive comments from mrs. park about your degree and a whole fuck ton of sexual energy between you and seonghwa.

you could almost always feel when his gaze was boring into you, when you got up to take more mashed potatoes or kept your attention on eunbi as she told her parents about what job she wants to start at next semester.  

it’s also when eunbi almost let it slip about your scholarships, had you not viciously pinched her arm and caused a pained cry to leave her mouth - if you ever thought jiwoon was gonna verbally assault you, it was certainly in that moment.

“why did you pinch me so hard?” she whined later that night, jiwoon passed out on the couch after five too many homemade cookies. “look at my bruise.”

a genuine frown crosses your lips as you look at her arm, rubbing her skin gently as you mumble your soft spoken apologies.

“i’m sorry but i just... i didn’t want your mom to know that,” you say back just as whiney and pathetic. “she already thinks i’m an incompetent idiot. knowing i have to wait a whole year because i’m broke is just too embarrassing.”

it’s an admission that, while eunbi already suspected that, still makes her feel bad - it nearly makes her wanna cry, that you don’t feel welcomed and loved in her home because her mom has to be a judgmental bitch.

“y/n...”

“bi, it’s fine, oh, my god do not cry right now,” you grumble, flicking her in the head lightly.

“i just feel bad,” she cries lowly, moving hrself closer to you and away from her boyfried. “it’s not fair, y/n. you worked so hard and now you have to wait. how could they do this to you?”

a small, touched smile crosses your face at eunbi as you shake your head, dabbing at her watery eyes.

if jiwoon wakes up, he’s literally gonna beat my ass,” you say, smiling when a wet giggle leaves eunbi; you don’t want this time to be sad or upsetting. “i thought he was gonna hit me at dinner.”

“okay if he’s hitting anything, it’s gonna be my-”

“no. no, no, no.”

the snort that leaves her mouth doesn’t help the sinking feeling in her stomach, looking at you with a frown still adorning her face.

“i’m sorry if my mom’s making you feel uncomfortable. she does it to every single person ever and i don’t-”

“it’s fine, please stop apologizing for her,” you say, the sinking reminder in the back of your mind that seonghwa had been doing the very same thing - apologizing for that woman.

“i know she’s stressing you out, too. we’re in it together.”

“that’s true,” she sighs, letting out a long, dramatic groan before resting her head on your shoulder. “i’m so bloated, i don’t think i’m ever gonna be able to eat again.”

and it was funny that, days after the holiday, eunbi was still convinced that she was bloated from christmas dinner.

“babe, i don’t even think that’s possible,” jiwoon consoled her, you and him sitting in her room as she gets ready to go down to the pool.

because, naturally, like everyone in this godforsaken rich town, they get ready to go to the pool that’s inside of their homes; when eunbi told you to pack a bathing suit back at your apartment, you looked at her like she was insane.

until she clarified that her pool is heated and, conveniently, indoors.

“just through the backyard,” she had said - and she truly meant it.

just a few yards away from the main deck area, with floor to ceiling glass windows that showcase the extravagant landscaping and, of course, the outdoor pool and jacuzzi just a few feet away.

“eunbi, this is insane,” you say, marveling at the sight before you.

“don’t you wish you came sooner?” she asks with a wink, your eyes rolling as you place down your towel.

you had the option to bring two bathing suits - a skimpy black one you don’t remember being so scandalous or a red one you remember eunbi insisting you buy last summer.

and you just knew it was because danny was coming, currently showcasing his impressive eight pack that, truly, just doesn’t do it for you - maybe if he was twenty years older, apparently, and somebody’s father and husband.

you shake the thoughts out of your head, walking a few steps toward the pool before eunbi tackles you from behind. you both land with a loud splash, followed by the excited shouts and loud splashes of her other friends.

you’d be lying if you said you could remember the last time you had this much fun, splashing and giggling and acting so carefree despite the many challenges you’ll have to face soon.

but that’s not any of your concern right now, currently sitting atop danny’s shoulders and trying to knock down eunbi in a game of chicken.

“you little bitch! get your nails out of me!”

“coming from the girl who literally just tried to choke me two seconds ago!”

“like it’s your first time being choked!”

and you don’t know whether jiwoon was shocked by you saying that statement or the fact that his girlfriend exposes all of her sexual kinks to you but alas, it did the trick in sealing you a victory.

a smug smile on your face as danny jumps up and down in excitement, your body bouncing and nearly falling over him had you not gripped onto his shoulders.

it’s at that time eunbi pops up from the water, hair a soaking mess and mascara running down her face. she’s about to open her mouth, probably to yell at you, before a volleyball is thrown through the air and just misses her face.

instead, it hits danny square in the head. the boy letting out a yelp before you promptly fall backwards in the water, hearing eunbi’s shrill squeal and giggle on your way down.

you pop up and throw her a dirty look, danny rubbing at the back of his side before apologizing profusely.

“it’s okay,” you giggle out, about to say you shouldn’t have been up there for so long before eunbi’s squealing in the air.

“dad, what the hell kind of aim was that!”

you feel your body stiffen before you quickly shoot around, none another than mr. park standing there looking as handsome as ever.

he puts the young men around you to shame, good-looking, muscular college boys who anyone in their right mind would find attractive - but they just don’t beat him.

his striking eyes or tall, lean stature or the fact that he’s just so fucking-

“got worse with age, bi, what can i say?” he chuckles, extra white fluffy towels in his hold that he places on the chair. “sorry, danny.”

seonghwa’s known danny for a few years now, one of jiwoon’s friends who seems... alright. not a bad guy but also not a good guy - just kind of there; but it didn’t occur to the man just how much he was bothered by him until he saw you on his shoulders.

because he could’ve put you in danger, of course. put you in danger at his house where if things got bad, he’d be responsible; as for the ball, it merely slipped from his finger tips.

“no problem mr. park,” the kid smiles, the other friends gathering around and looking at him expectantly. “we’re gonna play a round of volleyball. you in?”

“no. no dads allowed,” eunbi whines, seonghwa rolling his eyes at his bratty adult daughter.

“why not? because i’m better than all of you, eunbi?”

“oh please,” she grumbles lowly, rolling her eyes and grabbing you to lead you toward the stairs. “you know what, we’re going in the hot tub anyway. since she decided to rock my shit in chicken. enjoy my father traitors,” eunbi grumbles to jiwoon and his friends.

“i did not,” you protest weakly, feeling two pairs of eyes on you as you make your way out of the pool with your friend.

the first thing that strikes seonghwa, apart from the major twitch in his pants, is how skimpy your bikini is.

red bottoms with thin straps holding it up, a matching red top showcasing cleavage and beauty marks on your chest and all the things that are proving to drive him fucking crazy upon seeing you every day.

it’s taking everything in him to control the growing ache in his shorts, your eyes looking at him so coyly and attentively that you’re ignoring the college boy gawking at you right in front of him.

there’s a certain sort of twisted pride in his chest, you giving him attention and seemingly reciprocating his interest, when there’s someone younger right there for you.

younger and unmarried and more suitable for you. someone you can actually be with where it wouldn’t be considered dirty or wrong or secretive; but maybe that’s why you’re both drawn to it in the first place.

that, and because you’re both really hot.

“he’s literally hot, y/n! why don’t you like him?” eunbi whines to you, the two of you sitting across from one another in the hot tub outside.

the december air is crisp but feels nice comapred to the steaming water you’re gratefully submerged in. anything to take you away from mr. park shirtless and wet in the pool right now.

“i do like him, bi,” you mutter, trying your best to convince her and now seem suspicious.

“okay, yeah, as a person but who cares about that!” she whines, flopping her hands dramatically in the water. “you don’t want him to rail you.”

“eunbi!” you squeak, splashing in her direction as a warm, embarrassed blush rises to your cheeks.

“i’m serious y/n. you’ve never been railed before and danny’s such a good option. he’s hot and he’s sweet and he’s so pathetically into you, it’s a little sick.”

you don’t know what to say so you don’t say anything, shooting her a look that screams can we please not talk about this because you don’t know how much i actually wanna be railed by your father so let’s stop this discussion.

but she only rolls her eyes, moving herself closer to you so she can tug at your arm annoyingly.

“is he just not your type?” she questions, her eyebrows pulling together in confusion for a few moments before utter shock crosses her face.

“wait, what is your type? it’s... men, right? have i been hooking you up with the wrong gender this whole time?” she asks in disbelief, “could we have been hooking up this whole time?”

you press your lips together so you don’t burst out laughing, dryly replying “yes, eunbi, i’m into men.”

but the more you think about it, the more you think maybe you don’t have a type.

“and i’ve... never really thought about it before, to be honest. i just know i’m not into like... frat guys or whatever.”

because any party you’d been to, any douchey college guy wearing a backwards hat or cut off shirt, you had never been more disinterested. you couldn’t ever picture yourself falling for someone like that, romantically or sexually.

the one time you remember thinking someone was hot was when you took film and lit with your 31-year-old professor.

“so older guys?” eunbi concludes after hearing that, a smirk on her face as she raises her eyebrows playfully. “we gotta scope out some golf courses or retirement homes?”

“please,” you scoff, a giggle leaving her mouth as she throws her head back gleefully.

“okay, really though, i’ll tell danny you’re not interested and to stop trying so hard if you’re really not interested.”

but maybe danny as a distraction will be good.

will make you see that, perhaps, someone single and your own age and not your best friend’s father will be good thing for you to explore.

so you shrug lightheartedly, the smirk on your face causing eunbi to let out a low “oooh shit.”

you look over at her and your smile only widens when she knocks your shoulder, saying that you’re looking to be a play girl and drain a rich, lovesick man of some christmas presents.

“yeah, right! why drain a rich man when i can drain my best friend,” you tease, looking around her yard and still in astonishment that this is really her life. “i mean, two pools? is that really necessary?”

“three actually. there’s one behind the guest house on the other side. a small one. very humble.”

“oh, a small one, okay. great.”

she lets out another giggle, the two of you talking over plans for new years eve.

you might go up to jiwoon’s parents house in the mountains for the weekend, spend the time drinking with the small group of friends you’ve come to genuinely like over these past few weeks.

“it’s only two hours away so it won’t be that bad either,” she says, getting up to shake the hot water off her arms. “i’ll be right back, i have to pee.”

you nod your head, grateful she didn’t piss in the pool and allowing yourself to sit there, eyes closed, body relaxed, in the silence.

you can hear the faint screams of the boys from the indoor pool area and the swish of the hot tub filter, peeking open your eyes when, suddenly, you think you hear a boom of thunder in the distance.

you watch the sky darkening and clouds coming in, signaling a storm is coming in soon and quick. a sigh leaves your mouth, enjoying your last few moments of peace before finally standing in the hot tub.

the crisp winter air blows and sends goosebumps up your arms, a shiver running through your body as you attempt to splash some hot water on your upper body.

you don’t know how you know someone’s watching you but you do, some sort of strange intuition within you looking up to see none other than mr. park standing a few feet away from the hot tub.

his dark hair is wet and hanging in his face, swimming trunks soaked and his exposed chest still dripping chlorine water.

you press your lips together as your eyes roam his chest, a hint of abs on his lean stomach that causes a small, strangled groan to leave your mouth - you will never understand how this man is pushing 40.

but the same way you’re looking at him, he’s looking at you.

water covering your body, currently hunched over trying to warm the rest of your body; but it’s when you stand he really starts to gawk, your figure standing full and tall and giving him a perfect view of your hardening nipples from the cold crisp air.

you can see the lust in his eyes the same way you know he can and you’re about to do something to just make him crack. mistakingly untie your bottoms, catching them at the last second so he thinks he’s about to get a peak.

or undo the back of your top and pout at him, ask him to please tie it back for you because it’s way too hard to reach behind and do it yourself.

or maybe you’ll just drop to your knees right there, try to see if there’s any hint of a bulge in his swimming trunk bottoms and-

his body is gone just as fast as he arrived, confusion covering your face before you shake your head of your perverted thoughts - dropping to your knees when his daughter and wife are right here, what the fuck is wrong with you today?

you blame eunbi, all her talk about getting railed when you’ve been wanting to jump her father’s bones.

you carefully make your way out of the hot tub, not wanting to eat shit and scarp your leg on the concrete.

it feels like you’re about to freeze in the cold, another shiver wracking your body before you turn to stick your cold, goosebump-ridden arms back in the hot tub. it warms you for just a few seconds, a low, satisfied hum leaving your mouth before you hear footsteps coming up from behind you.

something in you tells you it’s him again.

whether it be the way your body heats up and feels prickly, the obvious feeling of eyes burning into your exposed back causing you to remain still and oblivious.

but you can longer remain oblivious a few seconds later, when a tall body is just a few inches away from completely pressing against you.

“you forgot a towel,” is all he says, placing it on the wet rim of the hot tub.

when he leans forward to place the white towel down, he’s careful and meticulous with his movements. brushing up against you every so slightly and carefully that you can feel his hard bulge on your ass for a few seconds too long.

at first you think you’re crazy, feeling what you were trying to envision in your head, but then you absolutely know it there’s.

you can feel the wetness from his bathing suit on your legs, his cock right there resting on the thin, red fabric of your bikini bottoms and if you were as weak as you felt inside, if he stayed there just a little bit longer, a moan would’ve absolutely left your mouth.

if you pushed back just a little to feel more of his cock on you, grind your ass his hardness just enough to hear him let out a low groan or maybe curse a little.

but he moves away, almost like he knew the perfect amount of time before that happened and almost like he did it by accident - but when you turn around and see the look in his eyes, you know it wasn’t.

the same way he can see a palpable desire and surprise and tension in your gaze, causing him to suppress a growing smirk. it makes you wanna tease him back in whatever way you can but you know that eunbi’s due back from the bathroom at any moment.

so you only cock your head to the side, lick over your lower lip carefully as you grasp the towel in your hands gently.

“thank you, mr. park,” you say, your voice as airy and sweet as you can possibly make it without sounding like an idiot.

“you’re welcome, y/n,” he says, taking a few steps back as his eyes lock on you. he stays there for a few moments until he hears the door to the pool house open.

you watch his lustful, dark expression change right then and there, a towel wrapping around his lower body and his face stretching into a happy, father-approved look.

“so you’re good with anything for dinner, y/n?” he asks, his voice loud and clear enough for his approaching daughter to hear. “i know you mentioned you were picky.”

“let’s get pizza!” eunbi screeches through the air, telling seonghwa that everyone’s staying over and they’ll need at least four boxes.

but you can’t even think about pizza right now, not when this moment right here is solidifying the crazy thought in your head that your best friend’s dad wants you just as much as you want him.

you called him out later that night around one a.m., after eunbi and jiwoon were the last to pass out to your scary movie marathon.

the others were sprawled out on the basement floor, an intricate array of blankets and pillows on the floor that you attempted to weave through, both, skillfully and quietly.

there was a dryness in your throat that could only be settled by a cold glass of water, making your way through the house quietly and praying you don’t run into mrs. park.

she’s been just as passive aggressive as she usually is in front of people so you could never imagine being alone with her. wondering what the hell she’d say to you without seonghwa and eunbi as buffers.

you were relieved when the lights were off in the kitchen, padding your way to the fridge to take out a bottle of water. you twist and turn the cap off to gulp down the cold liquid in the refrigerator light, a quiet gasp leaving you as your thirst is quenched.

you briefly consider going up to eunbi’s room to sleep tonight, not sure how you feel about being squished in with eunbi and jiwoon cuddling on the couch, when the light suddenly flicks off.

it causes you to freeze and halt all thoughts, fear running through you for all three seconds before you see seonghwa’s tall, familiar figure pass you. you watch him carefully in the dim light of the fridge, his shirtless chest yet again right in front of your face.

leaned back against the counter across from you, giving you a perfect view of his toned chest and gray sweatpants.

“midnight snack?” he asks, the smirk on his face almost causing you to roll your eyes.

instead, your lips quirk into a small smile. raising your water bottle by your head and shaking it, the water swishing in your pounding ears.

“just water,” you respond quietly, matching his low tone. “i hope that’s okay.”

“that you took water? of course, y/n,” he says, amusement in his gaze as he looks you over.

you’re freshly showered and in a pair of pajamas, matching pink sets that eunbi got you for christmas one year - he remembers because he was with her when she bought it.

a soft smile crosses your face, your back getting cold from the open fridge but not daring to move a muscle. not with him looking at you the way he is and with his body just a few feet away from you.

a silence lingers in the kitchen, you not sure why he’s looking at you and him waiting to see if you say something, before he bites the inside of his cheek.

“i wanted to say sorry about before.”

your eyebrow quirks up, interest so clearly peaked as you cock your head to the side.

“what do you mean?”

a smirk crosses his face as he watches you play dumb, head cocked and eyes wide and everything about you with such mock innocence, he thinks that’s what’s driving him the most crazy.

that you do this shit and say certain things with almost complete unawareness and innocence, if it weren’t for the hidden look of desire and teasing in your eyes.

“you know,” is all he says, his voice dipping and eyes twinging darker, it makes your lower stomach swoop.

a part of is positive, even if you ask, he’s not gonna say it aloud.

he’s not gonna say or acknowledge any of this aloud and make you guys play this game until you leave in a few weeks.

and then when you leave, unsure about your next prospects of college or education or even living arrangements, who knows if you’re ever gonna see him again.

so you only hum lowly, closing the fridge behind you and leaving you both in darkness. the only source of light is from the moon outside, lighting up half the kitchen from the large bay window.

it leaves you both incredibly exposed, anyone from the outside able to see the two seemingly innocent bodies standing toe to toe with each other; but they don’t see the lustful looks and eyes full of desire, both of you so entrapped by the other, it’s obvious with the tension in the air.

“oh, well, then... it’s okay, mr. park,” you say with a smile, taking a step back as your eyes roam his chest one last time. “i didn’t mind.”

you’re about to say goodnight when you see his arm reach out, shocked but oh, so ready ready to give into your desire and feel your body crash against his or your lips connect finally.

moan into his mouth and feel more of his hardness against you - but he only takes the water from your hand, presses his mouth against the plastic rim and swigs down a big gulp.

you watch with wide eyes as his adam’s apple bobs in the moonlight, head tipped back and body perched calmly on the counter as he takes a swig of your water bottle, spit exchanged and his mouth right where yours was.

he pulls back with an unreadable expression, licking the excess water from his lips before simply closing the cap, holding out the bottle and smiling at you with the most wise-ass smirk you’ve ever seen, you’re not sure how you’re ever gonna one up this man.

"sweet dreams, y/n.”

strike 3:

your new years weekend get away turned into an extended stay that consisted of sleeping on a lumpy air mattress, five extra guests and so much alcohol, you’re positive you’re still hungover three days later.

“it wasn’t that... we only did a... i mean it wasn’t like we were....” eunbi says, the two of you laying on her bed nursing headaches and body aches to the severest degree.

“okay, it was pretty bad. we were kind of rowdy and out of control.”

“you don’t say?” you grumble, never one to black out and get that shit faced and then doing it nearly every night - maybe to deal with danny’s pathetic soft looks or whispered sweet nothings to you.

“nothing is working either. not advil or water or greasy food. we might’ve fucked ourselves for life, bi.”

but if there’s one thing that always helped for eunbi, it was a nice, long bath. steaming hot water that burned her skin and the prettiest bath bombs to make the entire bathroom smell of strawberries and cream.

so even though you didn’t want to, nothing more comfortable than eunbi’s king size bed and warm, fluffy comforter, you allowed the girl to drag you to the bathroom down the hall to set up ‘your last resort, hangover paradise.’

it consisted of every type of bath bomb and lotion and bubble bath the luxurious could dream of, sending her out immediately when you saw her sneaking in with a glass of champagne.

“are you crazy?” you ask, dipping your toe in the water to test the temperature. “that’s what started this disaster.”

“fine, more for me!” she squeals happily, turning down the lights and pressing the bluetooth button for your phone’s music. “enjoy. i’ll see you in an hour, completely hangover free.”

“we’ll see about that,” you grumble, your words falling on deaf ears as she locks and closes the door to makes her way back to her ensuite.

and as much as you wanna give eunbi shit for her pompous tactics and techniques for everything in life, you have to say that this is certainly helping.

soaking in the steaming hot water, with cucumbers on your eyes and quiet music playing through the ceiling speakers. the jets in the tub also added another layer of relaxation to it, healing your sore muscles from days of waking up on a hard, wooden floor.

the mirrors were steamed and the room was boiling by the time you got out, stepping on the fuzzy bath mat and drying yourself off with a towel. you had tried not to get your hair wet but it proved useless, your relaxed body sinking further and further down until nearly your whole head was wet.

you stretch your arms above your head as you let out a content groan, feeling the best you’ve felt in three days and ready to take a nap.

but it’s at that moment, looking around the large steaming bathroom, that you realized you didn’t bring a change of clothes in. meaning you’ll know have to walk done the hall and into eunbi’s room in just a towel.

it’s fairly late, almost 11:30, so you’re hoping that her parents are in their rooms and fast asleep by now.

you peak your head out, feeling like a spy in a cheesy action movie as you look up and down the hall. you turn off the light once the coast is clear, walking quietly but quickly down to eunbi’s room - or wing, as it could be considered

you’re almost out of the gate, just a few more steps until you round the corner down eunbi’s hallway, when seonghwa’s tall figure is coming right up the stairs.

his head is down as he looks at his phone, still in his dress shirt and tie from his long day at work. you noticed that after the holidays, he’s been around the house less - working from home when he can but also needing to go into the office more often than not.

he’s at the top of the stairs when he finally notices your figure watching him, wrapped in a towel with a flush on your cheeks and your wet hair dripping on the floor.

it seems to be the thing to break him right now, not able to tear his eyes away or think of any fun, flirty comments to keep you from suppressing the need to roll your eyes.

because his days have been long and stressful and the only thing he needs right now is to just get off - and then there you are like something his prayers have answered, standing there quiet and awestruck at the sight of his loose tie and messy black hair he’s been running his hands through all day.

“h-hi, mr. park,” your quiet voice says, sweet and soft-spoken and utterly apologetic, like you’re embarrassed to be caught in just your towel - and he supposes that would make sense, to feel embarrassed about getting caught like this your friend’s father.

but he can’t find it in himself to care right now, two seconds away from dragging you down to his office so he can finally fuck you over his desk - but he knows that would be the worst decision in the world, for countless reasons.

“hi, y/n,” he grumbles back just as low, leant against the railing with a voice that sounds defeated and gruff.

“are you okay?” you ask, something about his voice and demeanor off.

he has to hold back a strangled laugh, his lips quirking up before he bites down on his lip.

“i’m... i’m fine, thanks. work’s just busy,” he says, a certain part of his chest warming at the fact you even asked - he knows his wife won’t when he walks in their bedroom in a few minutes.

“oh, okay,” you respond, twirling with the end of your towel nervously. “well... i’m sorry to hear that.”

he allows himself to let out a chuckle this time, shaking his head as he looks over your bare, wet face; you’re too pretty for your own good, he’s not even sure you realize just how pretty you are.

just how much he really wants you and just how much he’s coming to like seeing you in his house everyday.

“it’s alright, that’s why you gotta do something you love, right?” he quips, his long fingers up to recreate a camera, pressing down as if to snap a photo.

it cause you to let out a soft, genuine giggle, nodding your head and easing the slight embarrassment of him catching you in a towel.

“right,” you say with a smile, shy smiles and gazes shared until you finally look away in fear of your cheeks warming again.

but it doesn’t stop him from admiring the view of you, your bare face and exposed chest before the towel covers up all the parts he wants to so desperately explore.

he pictures dropping your towel and hearing it fall to the floor with a plop, take in the sight of your perky boobs and hard nipples in the air.

drop his mouth just a little bit to your neck, pressing small kisses against your skin as his fingers knead your nipples, all the quiet moans and breaths to make sure you two don’t get caught shooting right to his cock.

he probably wouldn’t be able to control himself, sliding a finger into you right then and there in the middle of the hallway, pressing your back against the wall to have you trapped against his larger body.

he’d pump his finger in and out of you slowly and tauntingly, hearing how wet you are and feeling how tight you are. it’d be similiar to how this past month has just been both of you taunting and teasing and beating around the bush, occasionally letting his fingers curl to his your g-spot or graze your sensitive clit.

and then he’d drop to his knees to taste you. make sure he sucks and licks and takes your clit in his warm mouth that you’re-

“i should get back to eunbi,” you finally say, breaking the silence and ripping him from his dirty, hidden fantasies. you can’t take the lust and desire in his eyes that you see when he looks at you, an painful ache building between your legs more and more.

“goodnight, mr. park.”

you nearly run into eunbi’s room and slam the door had you not seen her sleeping form, passed out right there in the middle of her bed wearing a baby pink robe.

you look beside her to see an extra one laid out, a silky lilac one that causes a small smile to cross your face.

you’ve never felt material like this on your skin, basking in the feeling of the smooth, silky material as you clean up her room quietly - both to tidy up and distract you from the ache in your legs and last encounter with her father.

for eunbi growing up with housekeepers and nannies her whole life, it always surprised you how clean and tidy your roommate was; the sink was never full of dishes and you alternated vacuuming the living room carpet.

but it’s obvious all of that is a facade because since the moment she got home, her messy ways have shown through - you find it endearing, though, and it’s all very eunbi: a homey, lived in mess of luxurious items and articles of clothing worth more than your childhood home.

the girl in question had moved to the right side in her sleep as you cleaned, a quiet chuckle leaving your mouth. you look to see both your water bottles are empty, deciding on the brave decision to go downstairs to grab two new ones.

the last time you’d done that, you thought for sure mr. park was gonna jump your bones - and you know you were gonna let him.

your mind is littered with memories of that night as you make your way through the dark house of twists and turns, carefully going down the stairs as you walk toward the kitchen.

there’s a room with beautiful double doors on your left, a room you’ve walked past hundreds of times throughout your stay here. eunbi told you it was her dad’s first floor office, where he usually worked and had his meetings from home.

the first thing you notice from down the hall is that the door is slightly cracked open, a peak in from the dimly lit kitchen showcasing some fancy decor of a globe.

as you make your way closer and closer, your ears are met with a quiet, strangled groan that causes you to stop in your tracks; your mind begins to race with a million different scenarios of what you could be walking past right now.

your first thought is that you’re about to see mr. and mrs. park in a very compromising position over his desk - and, as sick as it sounds, as delusional and crazy and absurd as it sounds, that prospect makes your stomach sink and twist painfully.

but that would be normal, you suppose; they’re a fucking married couple after all and seonghwa had seemed stressed from work. obviously he was gonna ask his wife to help calm him down and relax him.

get all of his stress out in the form of-

you shake your head before you can even think about it, forcing your feet to move past the office doors.

and it’s like you can’t even stop yourself from peeking in, confirming to see if your thoughts are correct and you’re about to be gutted, when you take in the sight before you.

seonghwa still in his loose tie and white dress shirt, pants around his ankles and his head thrown back in his office chair as his own hand jerks his cock off.

everything about it is dirty and wrong and you know you shouldn’t be looking in but you can’t stop.

you can’t stop watching the way his hand works around his cock expertly, long and thick and so fucking nice it nearly makes you drool. the thought of you on your knees before him, taking him in your mouth and licking and sucking around the tip, making you bite back a moan.

you can’t stop your eyes from looking at his face, his head thrown back and eyes squeezed shut with his neck on display - perfect for you to bite and give hickies, if you were on top straddling him.

you can’t stop the painful ache and wetness seeping in your thong as you watch him get off, his groans and grunts and heavy breaths making you wanna whine out in arousal.

and it’s that suppression right there, getting so worked up and horny over the sight of your peeping tina activities, that cause you to pull yourself away.

because as much as you don’t want to and as much as you wanna help him, you can’t.

you can only scramble into the kitchen and get water as fast and quiet as humanly possible, scurrying past the office and up the stairs with the stealthiness of a lion.

you can only lay in bed with the thoughts of your roommate’s father and the noises he makes, the sight of his cock and the hand movements replaying over and over in your mind.

and you realize that night, with only a few more days until you both have to leave for the spring semester, you can only hope to never see mr. park again.

let this flirtation and fascination and utterly screwed up infatuation with your roommate’s dad be nothing but a dirty memory you’ll keep to yourself for the rest of your life.

because if it’s not, if you have to see him again and have him in your daily life again, you won’t be able to hold yourself back.

your lust will turn deeper and you’ll find yourself in a much bigger issue than damp underwear and secret, forbidden moments with mr. park seonghwa.

you should’ve known with only two days left of your stay that eunbi was gonna let the news slip.

you were at least grateful for the fact that mrs. park had a charity ball with her clan of “botox getting, bitchy sounding gold diggers who need to desperately get laid,” successfully riding her of your last friday night dinner.

“so you girls don’t want a new apartment then?” seonghwa asked, glass of wine in his hand as he looks at the two of you questioningly. “that building’s looking for a new owner, eunbi, i think it’d be perfect for you both.”

“dad don’t be ridiculous, we can’t own the building!” eunbi says, swatting her dad playfully as she shovels a piece of food in her mouth. she’s casual and comfortable without her mom’s prying eyes and biting tone, her foot resting on the white fabric beneath her.

“and besides, i might be alone in there soon. we still don’t know if y/n is gonna be starting her-”

you kick the girl under the table roughly, her face pulling into a wince as a cry leaves her mouth.

“ow, y/n! what the he-”

but it’s upon seeing your white face and annoyed expression that she realizes what she said, her mouth falling open and silent as she looks at you apologetically.

“oh shit...”

you can only shoot her a pained, sarcastic smile, daringly looking at seonghwa who’s watching the two of you with a curious expression.

“what do you mean?”

silence hangs in the air, you and eunbi sharing side eyes and dejected looks with her dad before he cocks an eyebrow at the both of you.

“girls... what do you mean?” he asks, his voice deeper and more serious, taking on a dad-like tone eunbi isn’t used to hearing from her relaxed, playful father.

and that’s when, before eunbi can open her big mouth any further, you calmly and regretfully explain the situation with your scholarship.

how you got an e-mail a few months ago about alternate funding for the art department and that you were one of the many students who, while keeping up your end of requirements, could not be awarded money.

“it’s awful that they can do that,” seonghwa says, his eyes full of the same sympathy and outrage eunbi’s held - except he knows that this happens all the time. that it’s unfair and sick and a big ploy in the education system that needs incredible reform.

especially when it hurts students like you.

“yeah but it is what it is,” you say, trying your hardest to steer the conversation to literally anything but this (in fear that you’ll scream or start crying or have yet another anxiety attack).

“i can just finish up in the fall, it’s no big deal,” you lie through our teeth, a sad smile on your face as you look at eunbi. “i’m just sorry it messes up our combined graduation party.”

a frown crosses eunbi’s face as she smacks you in the arm, pulling you closer to her just so she could cuddle herself into your arm.

“i will wait for you,” she proclaims dramatically, a pout on her lips and starry-eyed look in her gaze. “i will wait as long as i have to. if they delay it any further, father, you will simply have to sue the school.”

“father, huh?” seonghwa hums lowly, his lips quirking into a smirk.

father is the term eunbi uses when she wants to use him and his money, whether it be blackmailing unfair teachers or shitty students or calling for him when her and her mom are fighting.

“yes, father,” she says, looking to you with a sweet, apologetic smile on her face.

“i’m serious, y/n. we got your back,” she quips with a wink, a pained smile on your face that she knows means you can’t wait to let her have it when you two are alone.

“you had one job, eunbi, and you were doing so good,” you say in her room later that night, pacing back and forth as she sits on her bed like a scolded child. “literally two nights left and you let it slip out!”

“i’m sorry, okay!” she whines for the ninth time, a pout on her face as she plays with fingers; you wanna roll your eyes seeing it, knowing for a fact that’s something she does when she’s in trouble with jiwoon.

“i didn’t mean to, it just slipped out!” she begins to defend, “and it was only my dad! he wouldn’t dare say a bad word about you, y/n, he loves you.”

you ignore the twinge in your chest when you hear her say those words, feeling a tad guilty at the bodily reaction you have about her own father. how much you’re hiding from her and that you have these suppressed feelings and secret moments in the first place.

“loves me or not, bad word or not, it’s still embarrassing, eunbi,” you say, a frown on your lips as you start to hear the situation aloud. 

“i still can’t pay for my tuition and have to wait almost a whole year to take a degree in fucking photography. like how embarrassing is that, all of this just for me never find a job and live in a box.”

you’ve only seen a flash of anger on eunbi’s face a few times in your life, the incident with the dorm girls and her dad and when a sorority girl tried to kiss jiwoon at the bar.

and you see it right now, her small but mighty frame jumping off the bed and lunging toward you quickly.

“are you kidding me!” she squeals, smacking you in the arm and pushing you down on the bed.

“what the hell do you mean a degree in fucking photography? or living in a box? you’re gonna be the best photographer in the world and shoot every event in my life and charge me quadruple the amount!”

a smile pulls at your lips as you hear her go on and on, hype you up and build up your confidence and tell you to never talk that way about yourself again. how there’s nothing embarrassing about not being able to afford thousands of dollars when you were alerted about the expense on such short notice.

“okay, okay, i know that,” you eventually give in, letting out a sigh as you flop down on her bed. “it’s just.... stressful. i can’t move back home but i also need to get like, a real job. a job that’s gonna pay well so i can save up as much as possible.”

“and we’ll find you that when we get back,” she says, assuring with a confident look in her eye and her hands in yours. “i can promise you, with or without my father’s connections, we’re getting you a job.”

her words prove to reassure you for the remainder of the night, when, after she kisses your ass a little more, asks if she can go to jiwoon’s for a little.

you spent that time in her room looking at nearby job offerings and building up your resume and cover letters, working well into the night hours with a text from jiwoon that she fell asleep and will be back in the morning.

you stretch your arms above your head with a quiet groan, noting it’s almost one o’clock and you’re fucking parched yet again.

it’s no surprise to you when the lights in the kitchen are on, dimly light and no noise around as you pad your way to the fridge.

you almost expect the footsteps that come in a few moments later, when you take a sip from your water and close the fridge without hesitation.

“have you told your parents about tuition?”

you’re confused by the statement that leaves seonghwa’s mouth, brows pulled together and a sinking feeling in your stomach at this conversation again - because as if tuition wasn’t enough, he just had to bring up your parents.

but you don’t wanna beat around the bush any longer; you two seem to do that enough.

“me and my parents don’t talk,” you say, straight forward and quiet as you look right at him.

it’s the first time he sees you look a little broken and defeated, a certain kind of sadness shining behind your eyes that makes him wanna pull him into you. it feels like a protective instinct he’s used to, caring for the people in his life and not wanting to see them struggle.

“they wouldn’t help me anyway.”

this protective instinct feels a little different in this moment, something else tugging in his chest that he hasn’t felt in a very long time - not until he started seeing you more.

“but it’d be a shame if you didn’t finish, y/n. you got so far and you’ve done so well for yourself.”

you smile a little at the praise, tongue rolling over your lips in a way he certainly doesn’t miss - but this moment isn’t about that. it’s not something he cares even a little bit about right now.

“thank you, mr. park, but i am gonna finish,” you say with finality, the confident and sure tone making a strange sort of pride swell inside of him.

“i just have to save up money and i’ll start in the fall. it’s really not that big of a deal,” you tell him with a smile, taking a few steps back so you don’t feel too crowded by him.

“eunbi’s gonna help me look for jobs when i get back,” you say, a teasing smile pulling at your lips as you look at him. “a big girl job. something real and hard, that’s gonna make me super stressed and agitated.”

so much so that i have to get off at the thought of you.

a deep chuckle bubbles out of him that you match with ease, the two of you sharing small smiles and quiet giggles in the middle of this spotless, white kitchen.

“can’t do what you love quite yet, i guess,” seonghwa says, his eyes roaming your face so slowly and carefully, it makes you a tad bit nervous.

you hadn’t realized how natural and easy this conversation was between you two, like you were talking to someone you’d known your whole life opposed to someone you’ve barely known for four years.

his hand itches to reach up and touch your hair, tuck the soft, silky looking strand behind your ear and watch your cheeks heat up when your skin touches; but instead, he smiles down at you, inching closer until he’s just looming over you and staring down at you with a soft, undetectable look in his eye.

“but it’ll be worth it in the end, i think. it’s just gonna... take some time.”

you lick over our lips, throat and mouth suddenly so incredibly dry, as you nod your head.

“yeah, i think so, too,” you say, your lips smushing together nervously before you open your mouth to speak again - this could be one of the last times you’re alone with him.

“thank you for letting me stay with you guys, mr. park. it’s been... really nice spending time with people for the holidays.”

he feels his heart twinge in his chest again, his eyes falling down to your lips and swearing he’s never wanted to kiss someone so bad in his life.  

“of course, y/n, it’s been a pleasure,” he says, a smile quirking at his lips with a hint of something you just can’t quite make out. “maybe we’ll see each other again soon.”

it was five days before classes started that you got the confirmation e-mail - a message confirming your tuition for the spring semester was paid in full and your current balance was $0.

you had to look over the message for three whole hours making sure you had read the e-mail correctly, even going as far to call the bursar office to make sure they had the correct address.

but they had confirmed with surety that your balance was paid off, urging you to quickly sign up for the classes you need before the day was over.

“okay, you will never believe what interview i was able to score for you,” eunbi says the moment she walks in the apartment, shopping bags up her arm and gucci sunglasses perched atop her head.

“i’ll admit, the vibe was a little off with the coworkers but i think it’d be a great opportunity to-” her eyes catch your laptop screen on the school website, a list of classes and times on your screen that causes her eyes to widen.

“oh?” she squeals, running over and throwing herself down on the couch beside you. “what the heck are you doing? are you... did you...?”

the lie came way too quick and easy to you, excitedly blabbering out that there was a change in the system and your scholarship was approved - “i think they felt bad that i was a graduating senior,” you said, eunbi’s face pulled into the happiest smile you’ve ever seen.

she clapped and danced and bounced around in excitement, proclaiming you guys just had to go out and get drinks to celebrate the fact that your surprise party was back on.

but you could only sit there with your thoughts and suspicions and this overwhelming feeling deep within your stomach that, while eunbi definitely doesn’t know, her father might’ve just paid your college tuition in full.

(part 2)

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