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tojikai · 1 year ago

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Sundered 4: GEARS

Pairing: Gojo x reader

Genre: Angst

tags/cw: angst, mean!gojo(kinda), babydaddy!gojo, babymomma!reader, motherhood, insecurities, suggestive smut, arguments, name-calling, L-bombs(lol)

word count: 6.7k

Decisions take seconds to make but can take months and even years to realize and regret.

“I still love you, Y/N. So, so much.”

Satoru wept, sniffing as he ran his fingers through his sweat-soaked hair. His vision was cloudy but the memories in his head were crystal clear. The day he met you, the day you told him the news; it was unexpected, but it gave Satoru a warm feeling in his chest. How could he let himself forget that feeling so easily?

You don’t get to get her back. A voice in his head once again whispered to him, allowing sobs to erupt from his lips.

The day he separated from you, he told you you’ll make things work, no matter what it takes. A few weeks after that his mother introduced Naomi to him. It wasn’t her job but she helped him work on himself, gave him all that she has to offer, and held him when he felt like losing his mind.

You were almost out of reach, mostly just talking to him when it concerns your daughter. It almost felt like he was fighting alone. It made him feel like he was not changing anything. He barely sees your face; barely feels you.

And then it happened, in such a short span of time. Naomi was the only one he sees, the only one he feels with him.

“It could work, you know? But only if both sides are committed to making it work.” She said, “But like these gears,” She pointed at the constructible toy train of his daughter, “The gears will only work if they fit.” Satoru didn’t need to hear any more of her words to understand what she was trying to explain.

He found himself smiling at her smiles and laughing at her laugh. He found himself saying: “We kinda fit, don’t you think?” nudging her playfully as they walked Yui to the park, earning a shy laugh from her.

He found himself spending more time with Naomi than spending time figuring things out with you. It all just happened in such a short span of time.

It felt like setting himself free when he didn’t have to think about the problems with you. It was emancipating to just lie under the covers, snuggled up in bed with Naomi’s skin against his. It was a breath of fresh air to share the same breath as her every morning and night as they soak in each other’s embrace, feeling the warmth of their swollen lips on one another.

He wishes that he considered the day he’ll see you like that with someone else.

To say that he was shocked when you came and saw him with Naomi was an understatement. He didn’t want it to be like that. He wanted to introduce her to you, to explain things to you, but for some reason, he couldn’t bring himself to do it. He didn’t want you to think that you meant nothing to him. But at that time, he thought that he meant nothing to you.

He searched for the emotions in your eyes but failed. He waited for your questions of “Why?” and “How?” but they never came. It’s like you just really stopped giving two shits about whatever happens in your relationship. And Naomi’s words reverberated in his head: “The gears will only work if they match.”

And that’s how his decisions were made.

That you deserve someone who’ll treat you how you want to be treated; that he deserves this serenity with Naomi, too. He’s not some kind of hero to keep heading for war when there’s a humble abode waiting for him. He thought that there was nothing for you and him but different paths. Maybe this is how falling out of love happens, he thought.

And that is how he learned that decisions can sometimes take months and even years to realize and regret.

“I love you too much to fight anymore, Y/N.” Satoru was pretty sure that he was inaudible and incomprehensible by now. The cracks in his voice and his occasional hiccups were probably louder than any sound near his phone. “You know, I never meant any of the shit I said to you that day. You and Yui were the best thing to ever happen to me, never will I regret you, love.”

He couldn’t even pay attention to your voice as he harshly wiped his tears away, blinking his eyes to look up at the blurry, colorful lights “I know you’re happy, I know you don’t even want to see me again if you’re given a choice.” Satoru shook his head, undoing the first two buttons of his shirt so as to help with the ache that is now smoldering his chest.

“But I just want to take those words back.” He whispered, running out of breath before quickly gasping, “Hell, I just want to take everything I did after I gave up on us back.” Getting nothing was painful enough, and so is getting up.

He doesn’t know where he’s going but he trusts that his feet will take them to where he belongs.

—---------------------------------------

“Yeah, she’s sleeping now. Sunburnt and all.” You laughed, tilting your head as you tried to hold your phone between your ear and your shoulder. “‘Gumi talk, Daddy. Pwease,” You heard Megumi’s voice over Toji’s chuckles. You and Yui spent all day at their residence once again. The kids had a mini swimming party with the neighbor’s son, Yuuji.

You can’t deny that your little girl’s been a bit more energetic nowadays. She’s also learning things, like pouring beverages into a cup; something from the internet that Toji has been teaching Megumi to do. “What do you wanna say?” Toji answered before the little kid’s voice followed. “Yui later. Come later. Uh, bye.” The little message made you giggle.

“She’s asleep now, ‘gumi~ We’ll visit again soon.” You heard Toji playfully scold him to go to bed already before getting back to the call, “I’ll tuck him in now. I’ll see you tomorrow, babe.” Humming, you said your good nights before ending the call. You watched Yui sleep, caressing her soft, blushing cheeks.

Everything’s been going good, and you could only hope that it’ll also be good for her.

Placing a gentle kiss on her forehead, three knocks at the door almost gave you a heart attack. It’s already late, who could it be? The place is a three-unit, up-and-down apartment, maybe someone got the wrong door. Wrapping yourself in a robe, you walked to the door. There was a muffled sound behind, and you can’t miss your name being mumbled.

You know the voice too well to wait any longer for confirmation.

“Satoru?” You spoke, brows knitting together. His hair and shirt were soaked in sweat. “Hey…” He laughed, standing straight as he stared at you with bloodshot eyes. Has he been crying? “What’s going on, Satoru?” You opened the door, letting him make his way inside as you gave him a concerned look.

“I mean it, Y/N.” What is he talking about? You wondered as he looked at you, sobbing all while trying to catch his breath. If somebody else saw him, they’d probably think something really awful happened. Not once have you seen him this broken before; not even when you fought so bad he had to leave the house.

“Satoru, I don’t understand you. You’re dru–“ You were cut off when he wrapped his arms around you, crying on your shoulders as he grabbed the sides of your robe, like a child not wanting to be left alone. “Y/N, please. I know what I’m saying, love.” He was gasping for air as he spoke, pulling away

“I know I’m drunk but not drunk enough to make wrong decisions.” His laugh lacked enthusiasm. Pulling away, you could see the smile on his face contradicts the big tears cascading down his cheeks. “Did you drive here?” You pulled away from his grasp, thinking about the next thing to do.

“No, I walked here. Let’s talk, please. Just a few–“ His face was close to yours, begging. His voice broke, and it broke you too and you know you can’t keep listening if he’s like this. “Satoru.” You turned, taking a step away from him. You could hear the shaky breath he took by how quiet it was.

“Yui’s already asleep.” You informed him, a subtle reminder that you wouldn’t want her waking up to a commotion again. Satoru nodded, lips quivering. “I can call Naomi to pick you up–“ You trailed but it was now his turn to cut you off. “No. I don’t…want that.” He knows it doesn’t sound right, and it gave you the impression that they fought.

“Fine, just your mom, then.” You turned to get your phone but his hand caught your wrist, a secure yet gentle grip. “No. Please.” He sounded like a kid. What has he done that not even the both of them can know that he’s here? “Can I stay here? Just for the night. I’ll sleep on the couch, Y/N. W-we’ll talk later… right?” He was on the verge of crying and you can’t stand there to watch any longer.

You don’t think it was a good idea, but this is the father of your child. Whatever happens to him will affect your daughter too.

“Just…wash up. Change. Check on Yui, if you want. I got a folding bed if you want to sleep there.” You turned around before walking back to your room, not waiting for the man to answer. You were planning to have some tea before going to sleep but now you just want to call Toji.

In two rings, you heard his voice from the other line. “Sorry, were you sleeping already?” You paced around your room, pursing your lips. “No, I was just checking on some files. Are you alright?” Concern was prominent in his voice. You wanted to tell him about this because he has a habit of coming over in the mornings. You surely don’t want him getting the wrong idea.

“Listen, Satoru’s here. I feel like he fought with Naomi, I don’t really know. He’s in Yui’s room.” There was a long silence and you got a feeling he was thinking carefully about how to react. “Is he trying to…” Toji cleared his throat before sighing, “Do you need me to go there?” He asked, and you could tell he was not very comfortable with your situation.

It’s only been a couple of months but Toji’s proven nothing but sincerity to you and it was all unconditional. You’re aware of the tension between him and Satoru; the latter being more impolite than the former. But even so, Toji never tried to take away the father role from Satoru. This only heightened your respect for him.

“It’s fine, I just wanted to tell you. I don’t want you thinking anything if you saw him here tomorrow.” You plopped on the bed, massaging your temple as you closed your eyes. “So, you know I’ll be going there tomorrow?” There was a chuckle behind his words. You felt a blush creeping up your cheeks.

“Go to sleep.” You rubbed your eyes, with a small smile on your lips. Once again, good nights were exchanged between the two of you. You’re just glad that Toji isn’t as shallow as other men. You were worried that your decision to let your ex stay for a night would upset him. Putting your thoughts to rest, you lay down on the bed, feeling the soft mattress against your skin.

Not even half an hour has passed and another set of knocks startled you. The fact that you have no idea what happened with Satoru made you worry. Could it be Naomi? Was your name involved in their fight? You doubt that she’d come here at this hour, though. You don’t see her as that type of woman at all.

You don’t even know if they really fought. Thoughts raced through your head as you hurried to the door. You wondered if Satoru was woken up by the knocks. He’s drunk and he sleeps like a log when he's drunk. But it would be different if your daughter starts crying. You don’t really want to talk with him about whatever it is.

It scares you when you think about how ‘the talk’ with him ended the last time. The day he shredded the last remaining hope you had of him, you and your daughter being a family.

Seeing headlights shining down your window pane, you wondered if Toji really drove here to accompany you. But he can’t be that fast, you thought as you opened the door.

Dressed in her expensive coat and a designer scarf, was Satoru’s mother, and you could already tell that she was not in her best mood. If Naomi and Satoru fought, you’re sure that your name’s mentioned.

Without thinking, you moved out of the doorway to let her in, “Good evening, Ma’am—” Slap. The next thing you know, you were already grabbing your cheeks. The skin was throbbing from the force of the contact and you were sure that this is about to leave marks later on.

“Won’t you quit being a slut?” You thought that the stinging sensation on your face was already painful, but those words proved you wrong. You felt degraded, humiliated even when no one was around; you felt like your whole being was trampled on. You don’t even know what you did. Does she hate you that much?

She used to claim that you ruined her son’s life. That you were just trying to leech off him so you wouldn’t need to work or use your brain. Those words broke your heart, not for yourself but for your mother who tried so hard to give you all that she can. When Satoru confronted her about it, she cried to him, blabbering about why she was right.

It wasn’t easy to speak about those things, you don’t want to make it seem like you were tearing him away from his mother, all while you were tearing him apart due to your situation back then. But you made sure that he knows the reason why you don’t want her around your daughter so much.

You wouldn’t be surprised if she’s the one who coaxed Yui to call Naomi Mama. After all, she’s also the same mother who shoved someone else into her son instead of helping to make sure that his granddaughter would grow up with a whole family. Do you disgust her that much? It shouldn’t be painful anymore at this point. She already won in kicking you out of her son’s life.

“I-I don’t know what’s going on, Ma’am. My daughter’s sleeping can we talk outside—?” Her scoff halted you. You found yourself wishing that you let Toji come over or for Satoru to wake up. “Now, you don’t want your daughter hearing about her mother’s mess?” She hissed at your face, laughing as you pushed yourself to walk out and close the door behind you.

“Satoru’s here Ma’am but I don’t—” Another slap landed on your face and this time it took everything in you not to throw the punch you were saving in your fist. “How fucking desperate can you be?” With her eyes blown wide in surprise, she pushed passed you, mouth foaming with her nasty words.

“Satoru!” She called out, walking like she owns the place. “You really took advantage of his feelings for you. You’re always so ready to ruin his and Naomi’s relationship so he’d go back to you.” She turned, pointing a finger at you. Your eyes widened at her words. Satoru’s feelings for me? You were confused.

“Just so you know, my son’s never been healthier ever since he left you. He doesn’t need a toxic relationship with a woman he didn’t even choose to be with.” The words were sharp and the way to your daughter’s room felt like you were being shot with each step. You already know that.

Why does she have to keep rubbing it to your face that you weren’t someone he voluntarily chose to love?

“Please don’t bring the child to this. I know you—” You felt like you never had the chance to speak a full sentence. “Of course, I won't. I won’t let her grow up with you. For what? So she could turn out to be like you, too? Satoru!” The words filled you with dread. You feared that they could easily take her away from you by any means they can. You got nothing to give.

Before she could even open the door to your daughter’s room, Satoru already came out. The emotions on his face were indiscernible as she stared at his mother. “Don’t take Yui, please. I won’t talk to Satoru if you want, just don’t take my child away.” You cried, ready to get down on your knees but Satoru was immediately on your side.

“What is this? What is going on? Mom!” Satoru held your figure, shaking violently and your skin, cold. You tried to get out of Satoru’s grasp, wanting nothing but to get close to your child who’s already starting to cry. You hated yourself for putting her in situations like this.

“Let me get Yui, Satoru, please. You can’t take her away.” Satoru was now the one baffled. His head felt like someone was hitting his skull with a hammer from the inside. Now, he wakes up to his mom causing commotion in a house where his daughter is in.

“No one’s taking Yui away, Y/N.” One of his arms wrapped around your waist, and the other, shielding you from his Mom. Satoru used to believe that his mother only wanted the best for him. He didn’t realize that what his mom wants for him is not the best for his daughter. “Mom, what are you doing?!” He reiterated through clenched jaws as you slipped away to get to Yui.

“You ask me what am I doing? You! Satoru, what are you doing, letting this whore ruin you and Naomi?” Satoru’s eyes widened, "Mom!" he looked at you and his wailing daughter, holding her against your chest. Terror was clear in her tear-stained face as she peeked over your shoulders, while you try to keep her eyes away from the chaos, “Bad Meemaw, Bad!” She sobbed, pointing her finger.

Satoru was about to close the door when his mother tried to beat him to it. “Is this how you want to raise your daughter, Satoru? In this environment?!” She was fierce with her words and Satoru’s just slowly putting the pieces together as she spoke. “She’s messing with your head, Satoru. Look at her, getting it on with another rich guy to milk, trying to make you come back to her.”

“You're the one creating this environment. Why did you even come here?” He questioned, stepping in front of her to prevent her from getting to you. “Where else would you be? You just called me saying you still love this bitch—” You don’t understand how a person could hate you so much when you’ve done nothing but try to respect them. “Don’t speak of her like that, Mom! You’re not of any help.” There was a hint of exasperation in his voice.

Satoru’s mother was the second wife to his father. Your mother used to say that 'the woman's just bitter because she knows that she’ll never really have his father’s heart even if she’s the one with him.' The first wife of his father went away, not wanting her only child to be in such tough and disconcerting conditions and just letting Satoru’s father be with his Mom.

Thinking about it now, you realized that your situation is kind of similar.

“Ma, no cry. Ma.” You heard your daughter reach for your face, making you ache even more. History really does repeat itself, you thought. “Mama’s fine.” You felt sorry for your child; for allowing her to witness something this chaotic. You wished that you’re a bit more well off, maybe her mother wouldn’t be so small and fragile against people like her grandmother.

“I didn’t call Y/N...” Satoru whispered, turning to look at your back as you tried to protect your daughter from the scene. “Just because he’s wasted and he’s telling you that he loves you, doesn’t mean you get to slither up at him like a snake!” Words were thrown at you and only now have you realized the situation.

Satoru tried to call your number to tell you that he loves you.

Your eyes snapped up at him, catching him looking already looking at you. He did plan to let you know about how he feels. But he didn’t want you to find out like this. He already messed up by letting himself break down and call the wrong person. Hell, he shouldn’t have even said it in a call.

It just hurts so bad. It’s like the words would pierce their way out of his heart and lungs if he didn’t get them out.

He can’t even expect anything, and he doesn’t even know how you’d take it. He could lose you completely after all this and that’s the last thing he wants. Now that you have Toji, he’s got no choice but to stand aside and watch. Like how he made you feel with Naomi. The thought made Satoru swallow as he took in your crying face; his chest throbbing with pain.

“Mom, can you please just leave?” He spoke in a low voice, breathing hard to stop himself from exploding. “You said too much already. Just go, this is my problem to fix.” His mother’s face tells Satoru she’s not letting up so easily and it took everything in him not to scream back at her.

“Of course, I have so much to say. I am helping you because she has done so much to you–“ Before she could even her sentence, Satoru was already raising his voice at her, making you cover your daughter’s ear. “Mom, all you did was make things worse!” It was a bad sight, you’ve never seen him get angry at his mother.

Knowing her situation with his Dad, Satoru always chose to be understanding to her. He once told you that he always wants his mother to feel loved and cared for because his father would never give her enough of that. “How could you? All because of–“ She trailed.

“You’re trespassing, Mom.” He said firmly, forcing himself to calm down. She knows what Satoru meant by that. You could file a case against her if she continues to cause trouble. “Listen, I don’t know what this woman fed you, but you better get your head straight.” She pointed a finger at Satoru’s face.

“I created this problem. Let me fix it by myself.” You could tell that fighting with his Mom is the last thing Satoru wants to do. There was a tired look on his face as he shook his head, “I wouldn’t want to create a space between us Mom. But I can’t let you involve yourself in every decision I make.” His mother can sense the light threat in Satoru’s words.

“Then, make the right decisions, Satoru. Stop ruining your life for someone with no future.” Before any of you could even talk, his mother was already stomping her way out of the room, slamming the door like it’s hers, causing Yui to start crying again. You sat there, thinking about everything you just heard.

“Shh, it’s okay, love. It’s alright.” Satoru took Yui from your arms, eyes full of worry. Rocking the weeping child in his arms, he hung his head low as you stared at him. You wiped the tears that were about to fall as you stood up, heading to the living room and letting him put Yui back to sleep.

You let yourself cry, you let yourself think. Just when you thought you were getting better, just when you started to accept everything that has happened. Yui’s cries slowly stopped after almost half an hour. You wanted to go there and put her to sleep by yourself but you don’t want her to see you cry anymore. It’s not good.

“What were you trying to do, Satoru?” were the first words that came out of your mouth. He stood there, motionless as he watched you turn away to wipe your eyes. “I…I love you. I didn’t mean it when I said I regret you or Yui. I love you.” His answer was a whisper but it was firm. Your eyebrows furrowed, tears once again threatening to fall. “Why?” You sobbed, “Why now?”

Satoru doesn’t know what to answer. He doesn’t even know if there’s a right answer but all he knows is he can’t expect anything from you. “I…I still do. I don’t think I ever stopped, I—“ He was cut off by your sharp intake of breath as you clutched the fabric of your robe to your chest. He let himself see how much he destroyed you again, how he heartlessly tore you apart once more.

“Why are you trying to ruin me again? Why are you trying to take away what I just got?” Your shoulders shake as you lean your forehead on your clasped hands. He wanted to hold you but he feared that you'd run away. Like how you’re getting harder to reach right now, with every passing second.

“You have no idea how much I wanted you to say that before all this, Satoru. You have no idea how many nights I had to cry myself, putting myself back together while you were trying to make someone else whole!” You turned to him, cheeks and eyes swollen from crying. “You have no idea how many times I blamed myself for not being the better one for you…” You whimpered.

It felt as though your words were a blow to his body, determined to crush his diaphragm to gouge his heart out as payment for yours that he stomped on so many times. Your hands were visibly shaking as you wiped your eyes with the back of it before speaking again, “You can’t say you love me now just because you want to, Satoru.”

“I know I can’t change anything…” Everything that comes out of Satoru’s mouth makes him feel stupid. If he was you, he wouldn’t even listen to him. While you both had your shortcomings in your relationship, Satoru knows that you wouldn’t have pulled yourself away if he didn’t give you a reason to.

“...but I can make it better, Y/N. I can prove it to you. Just let me—” He was getting desperate to put his feelings into words but you don’t want to hear it. He should’ve known. “Naomi is a good woman. She’s…a perfect fit for you.” You laughed bitterly, “Don’t hurt her. You know why I didn’t fight even when I wanted to get you back?” Each snivel that you make was a nail to his heart.

“Because you looked happy together.” The pain in your voice was thick before you gasped for air. “And I didn’t want to be unfair to you and to Naomi.” There was a sad smile on your face, probably reminiscing the day you found out he moved on from you. “So…please. Let’s not be unfair to Toji, too.” You looked up at him, smiling through your tears.

You looked tired; so, so tired of it all.

“But I love you…” He breathed out as you stood up, ready to retire to bed. “...I just wanted you to know that.” He grabbed your hand, urgently kissing it as he sobbed. You watched his face contort with sadness, closing his eyes and letting his tear slide over the bridge of his nose as he tilted his head to your palm.

You looked away, suppressing your cries; feeling it harder to breathe through the pain the more you feel his touch. You pulled your hands away slowly before quickly walking to your room.

Before you locked the door, you could hear his wails of anguish and the sound of two hearts shattering once more.

—------------------------------------------------

You woke up to the feeling of the bed dipping on your side. What time is it? When did you fall asleep? Yui. Remembering your daughter made your eyes snap open, trying to stand up immediately.

“Hey, hey. Calm down, it’s me, I’m here.” It was Toji, when did he come here? The brightness of the color of your curtains indicates the light of the sun shining down behind it. “I forgot that I fell asleep.” You sighed. In fact, you don’t even remember getting on your bed. The last thing you were doing was crying on the floor beside the bedside table. Did Satoru put you in your bed?

“Satoru left after feeding Yui her breakfast. She’s playing on my phone.” He got closer to kiss your forehead. “It’s too early for phones.” You yawned, covering your face with a blanket before sitting down. “Megumi’s with her, I’m taking their phones away after we eat.“ You nodded, pursing your lips as you remembered all the events from last night.

“Let me brush my teeth, I…got something to tell you.” You can see Toji licking his lips before humming, “Alright, we'll talk about it. I cooked something.” Letting him kiss your cheek as you stood on your knees and wrap your arms around his neck. His hands automatically snaked around your waist, murmuring “Let’s talk while eating.”

You told Toji about what happened the other night. Not as detailed as you remember it but you made sure that he knows everything he needs to know. No matter how awkward it was to discuss for you. There was a blank look on his face throughout the story and you can’t help but feel concerned.

“So that’s why he told me to take good care of you before he left.” It was obvious that he was tense, “I should’ve come last night.” Sighing, you shook your head, “It’s alright, I handled it. Please, try not to worry. You’re my boyfriend now.” You moved to sit beside him, pecking his lips.

You didn’t know how else to reassure him, you don’t like seeing the defeated look in his eyes. Throughout the day, he would randomly kiss you; burying his face in your neck. He’s more clingy than usual, and although it worries you, you find it really cute.

The following weeks proceeded the same, Satoru picking up Yui and Naomi tagging along wasn’t new but it happened for consecutive weeks now. You don’t know if Satoru told her, but she showed no signs of it. Though her gazes linger between you and Satoru at times, but there’s not a hint of hostility to it.

You don’t really know how they are with each other in private, but there’s a noticeable change in Satoru’s behavior towards her. “Get your bag from Naomi.” Satoru once commanded your daughter when you came to get her from his house. “Naomi?” She repeated, and running only after he nodded at her, confirming how she should address her.

“Did you take a cab? Toji’s not with you.” He would speak to you in a voice he never did before, it almost shocked you. He lost weight, he looks exhausted. “Yeah, he’s at work.” You answered earning a hum from him. “If you’re comfortable, I can take you home. It’d save you money, you know?” It was now your turn to hum, locking eyes with him.

When did they start looking this gently at you?

“You ready to go?” Naomi cleared her throat, suddenly appearing with Yui behind Satoru. “Yeah, I’ll be driving them home then I'll head straight to work.” He gave her a small smile, picking Yui up before taking the bag that Naomi was giving to you. “Bye, I love you.” Naomi stood on her tippy toes, kissing the side of his lips. “I'll see you later…love you." He responded.

The change on Naomi’s face cannot go unnoticed as she glanced at you. You looked down, feeling bad that she was probably anxious. And the fact that she’s clueless about it all just made it heavier than it already is.

Satoru opened the door of the passenger side for you. Now, he would usually let you sit on the back. You had to glance back at his house to know if Naomi saw it. You don’t want her to have problems with you when in fact, you're trying to help her.

“How are you and Naomi?” You found yourself asking Satoru as he sat beside you, his eyes watched you from the rearview mirror. “I’m trying. I really am. But I can’t force myself, Y/N.” He looked away, biting his lip. Your daughter was talking to her doll behind you and you’re just grateful that she’s still too young to understand this.

“Satoru, she’s been nothing but good to you. She did a lot of things for you.” You spoke gently. You’re surprised that you could now talk about this more calmly. Because it involves you. And you wouldn’t know what to do if Naomi finds out that her boyfriend’s still in love with you, begged you to take him back and never told her. You don’t owe her anything but you’re not that type of person.

“Would it be right to stay with someone for that sole reason?” He asked, and suddenly, you don’t know the answer. “It might only hurt them more if they find out that you stayed with them just because you feel obligated to and not because you truly love them.” He explained, smiling when he heard his baby daughter call his name randomly.

“It’s Dad. Not ‘Toru” You reached over to pinch her cheek, silently thanking her for breaking the ice. “Toji Dada too? Hm?” You can see Satoru tense up before a sad look flashed in his eyes. “I don’t know, love...Ask Mama?” You can tell he was hurt by how he got quiet. The little joy left in his eyes, now completely gone.

“You know Toji corrects her for that.” You defended as you stopped at the red light. “It’s good, though. I…” Pausing, Satoru took a deep breath. “I think he’s gonna be that, anyway.” He laughed, tapping the wheel before turning to look at you.

“You know I just want to prove to you that I love you, right? You don’t have to love me back, I know you’re happy with him.”

—----------------------------------------------------

Naomi’s been observing her boyfriend for the past few months. She can’t really determine what exactly changed but she knows that it wasn’t the same. The day you picked up Yui with Toji for the first time, she noticed that Satoru prepared more than he usually does.

At first, she thought it was just him getting more responsible. But when she saw that you came with your new boyfriend, she got a feeling that Satoru wanted to impress. She figured that it was because he wants his baby momma’s boyfriend to think highly of him and left it at that.

He’s been having mood swings but he’s also been getting more projects to work at so, it’s understandable. She also noticed how almost every movement of his daughter was documented and sent to you when she's with them. It was new because he rarely does it before. But she thought that it was only because your co-parenting plan was going better.

Everything that she notices about Satoru has valid reasons so, why is she feeling unsettled whenever the two of you would meet? It’s an unreasonable feeling because you’re already dating someone. There shouldn’t even be a single concern in her body.

Just a few weeks ago, his mother called her in the middle of the night, asking if Satoru was with him. When she said that she’ll call him to ask where he is, her mother quickly interrupted her, saying that he already replied that he was working overtime for a VIP client. She also said something about not interrupting him because the client’s a big person.

She still texted Satoru that night asking why he didn’t tell her about it. Satoru replied hours later, saying that it was an emergency project that needs to be discussed as soon as possible. After that, he sent another message with ‘I’m sorry.’

She came over the following night, intending to give him a soothing break. She prepared thoroughly during the day, wanting to please her boyfriend. Fatigue was obvious in his eyes when she arrived. Like he didn’t get an ounce of sleep.

“I’ll take that tiredness away, just relax in there.” She giggled, sensuously running down her fingers on his skin as she makes sure every physical contact they made was as soft as possible. She went down on him, watching him close his eyes as he grabbed her hair eliciting moans from her.

“Let’s do it without one,” She smiled, excited as she positioned herself on top of him, allowing him to feel her warmth as she pressed her chest against his. It was slow, passionate. He was so gentle with his touches and Naomi wanted to convince him to do it inside her so badly.

She was sure that all those perturbing thoughts of her would also be put to rest if that happens, she thought as she smiles, grinding onto him. But before she could get to that, he halted her, “Wait,” he spoke, reaching for the packet in his bedside cabinet.

Before she could even speak she was flipped over and it’s now Satoru on top. “I can take Plan B, just do it inside.” She bit her nail, giving him the eyes which only earned a smile, “Can never be too safe.” Not long after that, they both finished. Back then, he would agree to do it inside as long as she takes an emergency contraceptive after.

How come he wanted to be ‘too safe’ this time?

Her worries were put to rest for a little when he held her close when they came to get Yui. It also helped that you're still with your boyfriend. It only lasted for a bit until you had to pick Yui up on your own. Satoru found out that you were taking Yui out for an ice cream and the little girl asked him to come.

Naomi wanted to join; she was ready to dress up. But Satoru suggested that it should just be the middle day in your schedule, where the three of you would spend time together. It took everything in her not to frown in front of you. She felt rejected, she felt left out. The last straw was the talk she had with Satoru three days ago.

“What do you think about civil weddings?” She spoke to him, sitting on his lap as he watches T.V. “Huh?” He turned his attention to her, “Civil weddings. Maybe we could have it before the grand wedding, don’t you think?” She wiggles her brows at him, laughing as she daydreamed. Placing his hands on her waist, she kissed his lips softly.

“Or maybe we could put a bun in the oven first so, she’d be with us in wedding photos.” She whispered, half-joking. “Why are you dreaming? It’s still early.” Satoru laughed, taking his hand off of her to get the remote, switching between channels.

“I’m serious, though.” She pouted, hugging his neck. “Yeah, I know. But…It’s not in my plans, yet.” Her heart dropped at his words. She knows that he doesn’t mean it that way but it hurt her that after all the family talk and jokes he made with her, she’ll find out that it’s not even in his plans yet. Naomi wanted to cry, but instead, she got upset. She didn't let him know but she chose not to stay over at Satoru’s that night, claiming that she has paperwork. Before, he would persuade her to stay even if she has to do something.

How come he just kissed her goodbye this time?

It was tough on Naomi. Whenever she would ask Satoru about it, he said that he just got really busy with work. Even when he tells her that he loves her, she can say that he’s not even fully into it. And he doesn’t want to talk to you because she doesn’t want you to think that she’s accusing you when you got a whole new boyfriend.

Picking up her phone, Naomi decided that she just can't take the mystery anymore. “Hey, Mom. Are you free for lunch? I’d like to catch up.”

She just needs some advice. And she thinks that no one knows sons better than their mothers.

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written-in-flowers · 3 months ago

Text

The Newbie: OT8 X Male!Reader

Pairing(s): ot8 x male!reader | side pairing(s): hyunjin x changbin, han x minho, but mentions of everybody fucking everybody.

Genre: Smut, slight angst, slight fluff | au: idolverse, idol!au | MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!

Word Count: 11k

Summary: After being taken out of a few groups, you had nearly given up on your dreams of debuting as an idol. But, when you get chosen to take a spot in Stray Kids, more than your debut dreams will come true.

Tags: Polyamory, polycule, mxm, male!reader, Mentions/implications of homophobia, mention of Woojin, angst, group sex, orgy, threesome (mmm), heavy dirty talk, blowjobs, handjobs, nipple play, walking in on someone, voyeurism, exhibitionism, mutual pining/thirsting, slight internalized homophobia, mentions of sexual encounters, multiple sex rounds, top!Chan, top!Changbin, top!Minho, switch!Felix, switch!Seungmin, bottom!Jeongin, bottom!Han, switch!reader, bigdick!reader, unprotected sex (wrap it). everyone is horny and perverted lol

Disclaimer: This work is completely fictitious and for entertainment purposes only. They are not meant to reflect or label the members of Stray Kids in any way. The events within never took place. Thank you.

Next on Newbie!

***

It’s never easy being the new guy, especially in an established, popular Idol group. The fans already knew the main members, so they’re less likely to take to a newbie fresh from training. The members always carry a brotherly bond that could be hard to penetrate. Management will be accustomed to the usual number of members, and stylists will have trouble styling you for a while. You could often be forgotten, considering everyone is used to X amount of members without a plus one.

You knew too well what being The Newbie was like. You’d been added to three separate idol groups before being thrown into Stray Kids. Each one became harder to blend into than the last. Each head manager considered you a “bad fit” for the groups’ concept or vibe; they’d say you didn’t have the right sound or not enough training. Yet, a tiny voice inside you said that wasn't true. When you get caught looking at your fellow members or showing an interest more than platonic, managers tend to get nervous. Thinking about those times, you regretted letting it slip. You should have kept a tighter hold on who you are and what you liked.

You'd learned your lesson after Beomgyu.

You almost gave up on debuting completely before JYPE gave you another chance with a very popular group. According to them, they’d recently lost a member due to a scandal, so they needed a replacement quickly. You had no idea why they chose you, but you didn’t question it too much. This could be the break you needed.

“Don’t sweat it, dude,” Chan had told you on your first day. “You’re going to do great.”

This only worsened your nerves as he led you into the practice room. The tests. Even if they’d already chosen you, there’s always skill tests. You knew they meant nothing bad by it. Every group has units, and they need to know where to stick The Newbie. Are you a good dancer? A good singer? A good rapper? All rounder? You liked to think you did well in each category. You’d been a trainee for eight years.

“Guys, YN’s here.”

The group turned in your direction when you followed Chan inside. You stood apprehensively near him as their eyes landed on you. The other groups often judged you from afar, sizing you up and making their decisions right away. Yet, this group seemed to light up at the sight of you. They all stood up from their positions on the floor or couch and walked over to you. Friendly. Polite. Slightly formal still. You took in each of them, and they were…

Gorgeous. Absolutely gorgeous. Even barefaced in casual practice clothes, their looks blew you away. You kept your interest to yourself, but you couldn’t help noticing the tiny features. When he approached you, you decided blond-haired Felix’s freckles were his most charming feature. Changbin’s muscles made him a drool-worthy sight, and you immediately imagined grabbing onto them. Hyunjin’s cat-like eyes and sharp features eclipsed any model or actor you’d ever met before. How could you focus with so many handsome men around you? Especially nice ones who took you under their wing right away?

‘No, don’t do that. You’re not guaranteed a spot here. Act creepy and they’ll kick you out too. Maybe even worse.’

“How long have you been a trainee?” asked Felix, stretching before practice started.

“Eight years,” he said. “I was in some groups, but it never really worked out.”

“They disbanded?”

“No, they just decided I wasn’t a good fit for them.”

“They kicked you out?” he asked, eyes widened. “Just because you didn’t fit?”

“Yeah,” you sighed, stretching your arm across your chest. It sounded worse being said out loud. The embarrassment hit your cheeks, and you tried not showing it.

“Well, don’t worry, YN,” he said, bending his body. “You’ll fit in here. Trust me.”

His wink brought butterflies to your stomach and Minho called for attention. He told the group he wanted to teach you the moves to older songs as a warm up. The swarm of nerves inside your stomach strengthened, but once things started, you forced yourself to focus on Minho’s movements. He moved so fluidly, able to match whatever speed or vibe he was meant to go for. You copied him exactly, trying to ignore the members watching intently from nearby. You needed to impress them. Even if you didn’t join their dance unit, you wanted to show your best sides. When the song ended, the group members clapped.

“That was great!” Minho smiled. “You did really well for your first time.”

“Thanks,” you grinned, pushing hair from your face.

“You should have him do ‘Hellevator’,” Changbin suggested. Chan nudged him gently, earning soft disbelieving giggles from the others. “What?” he asked innocently. “It’s a good song and I think he’d nail it.”

You weren’t sure what their reaction meant, but you decided to take on the challenge. Minho first showed you the moves a step at a time, then took it a step faster each round. The other members occasionally whispered to one another, but they mainly watched. Your chest tightens seeing them eye you so attentively. Close observation is normal in these instances, yet something else hid behind their stares. When you rolled your hips at one point, you swore Changbin bit his lower lip. You realized how it might look in your fitted black shirt and loose black sweatpants. Yet, you maintained your focus. You mirrored Minho’s movements easily, an expert at dance due to years of training. You earned applause when you finished the last round with music on your own.

“You’re an amazing dancer,” Minho said, clapping for you. “How long have you been dancing?”

“Since I was eight or nine,” you answered. “I took dance classes in school, and studied it at university.”

“It shows,” he nodded, hands on hips and sweat already on his body. “I think we can move on to our new song, yeah?”

“Sure.”

He called on the other members, and dance practice began for real. Their comeback slowly approached, they wanted you to know all the new dances before then. A little voice in your head told you it was pointless in the end. A manager or member will eventually say they think you’re crap and kick you out; they’ll notice your lingering stares or catch on to your interest in them. You’ve wanted nothing more than to debut in a group. Singing and music have always been a part of your life. You sang all the time. You took dance and singing lessons with hopes of one day getting to be on a big stage. It was meant to be your destiny. You couldn’t see yourself doing anything else but this; it’s all you had. You hoped with time they’ll see how much you love what you do, and that you’d do anything to stay in the group.

“I don’t get how you didn’t make it in those other groups,” said Chan, wiping sweat from his face as practice ended hours later. “You’re an incredible performer. I saw some videos you posted online of you dancing, singing and rapping.”

You smiled shyly, “You saw those?”

“I had to after seeing you with the other trainees,” he said. You both left together to the cafeteria, “We’ve been looking for a ninth member for a while, but nobody really caught my eye until the trainee choreographer told me about you.”

“Hyunshik told you about me?” you asked, surprised and flattered.

“Yeah. I asked if anyone he trained stuck out to him and he brought up your name, so I looked you up. I sent the links to the other members and they agreed with me. How those groups let a total ace slip through their fingers is beyond me,” he snorted. “I’m looking forward to seeing you in the studio, though. You have an incredible voice.”

“It’s okay,” you said sheepishly.

“Don’t be so modest,” Changbin came up beside you, grinning softly. Fluffy black curls hung in his face, which he pushed back with his hand. “I saw your covers and you have a lot of talent. Your voice fits in with our style, and Innie and Seungmin could use a third in their unit.”

“You really think so?”

“Yeah, I do,” he said sincerely. “I wonder what’s for lunch. I’m freaking starving.”

“You’re always starving,” Chan joked.

“Wait, you were in other groups before us?” asked Han from behind you. “Which ones?”

“ZeroZeroTwo, Goldeye, and Galax1,” you said, your stomach dropping remembering each one. “They’re not super big groups, but…yeah, it just didn’t work out.”

“Those guys are jerks anyways,” he scoffed. “They must’ve seen you were too good for them and kicked you out from jealousy. Don’t worry, dude,” he clapped a hand on your shoulder, “You’ll do great with us.”

Their reassurances should have lifted your worries, but they remained weighed down anyways. Things always started off good and turned sour quickly. You did your best not to memorize Han’s comforting shoulder-clap or Changbin’s pretty curls. It was hard in particular to not notice Chan, whose dimples came out in his reassuring smiles. Those kind smiles can easily turn into scowls with the wrong word or look.

“If it makes you feel better,” said Chan, “I was a trainee for eight years before I finally debuted.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I trained like crazy, and kept falling out of groups until Stray Kids happened,” you both entered the cafeteria where you saw members already grabbing food. “I didn’t see the point of making attachments either, but this isn’t that. You’re going to do well here. I’ll help you. Plus,” he grinned, “It’s not like you don’t already have fans. I saw your following on Tiktok and Instagram. Have you told them you joined us?”

“No. I don’t want to make a big deal about it until I debut.”

If you debut with them, that is. You didn’t want to disappoint the small following you’d built in your time between groups. You’d done it with hopes the company would let you debut as a soloist instead of part of a group, but it never caught their eye.

You grabbed food down the line, and that was when you heard your name whispered nearby. Minho and Jeongin stood grabbing food, and your stomach churned.

“…What if he isn’t? That can really backfire on us if he’s not,” said Jeongin.

“Chan said he is, and I trust Chan.”

“But what if-”

“-We’ll see with time, Innie. Just keep it together.”

“Tell that to Felix-hyu-”

You blocked off their conversation, moving to the drink station. Did they already worry you wouldn’t work out for them? Though, you learned the context when you sat in front of Minho.

The nine of you were the only ones in your corner of the cafeteria, with staff sitting farther away. They likely did it to give the boys time to get to know you alone. The questions started innocently enough: where were you from, what did your family do, did you see them often, where did you go to school, etc. It was Minho’s sudden question that put you off your meal.

“Is it true you like dudes?”

The other members gasped and Chan, sitting next to him, smacked his arm. “Minho, seriously, dude?”

“Hey, it’s a fair question,” he defended. “Nobody sugar coated it when they asked me! They just went, ‘hey kid, do you like dick? Yes or no?’”

“Me too,” laughed Changbin, pouring more sauce on his food. "They told me I didn’t have to answer, but they definitely made it sound like I had to.”

“They asked you guys?” asked Jeongin from down the table, a bit confused. “They didn’t ask me.”

“Because you were a minor, and it would’ve been inappropriate,” Chan answered. “They told me they didn’t ask you, Hyunjin, Han, Felix or Seungmin because you were minors.” He turned to Minho again, “I was going to ask him in the dorm where nobody else can hear his answer. You don’t have to answer that right now, YN. Just pretend he didn’t ask.”

“I figured I ask since people talk about it,” said Minho.

“Who talks about it?” you asked, no longer interested in eating.

“Beomgyu from ZeroZeroTwo said it,” he said. “We see each other around the practice rooms and when I mentioned you joining our group, he said to be careful around you. When I asked what he meant, he said you were gay. He said you always acted weird around him, and that you’d check them out in the group showers after working out.”

Beomgyu. You should have known. Your crush on him started off slowly. The two of you shared a love for music and poetry; you liked nature, books, and art. You worked on songs together, producing tracks that would go on the group’s first album. Gradually, Beomgyu became a special person to you. Something about him drew you closer, and you thought he might’ve felt the same way. You were wrong. He made that known with his fist.

“And Chaeyeol from Goldeye said he always caught you checking him out,” said Hyunjin. “It’s totally cool if you did,” he said comfortingly. He gave a playful smile, “I've checked him out too.”

“YN, you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to,” said Chan, clearly embarrassed and worried about your reaction. “I promise my members,” he glared at Minho, “Aren’t normally this out of line.”

“Would you prefer to keep dancing around him about it or be direct?” Minho asked. “I prefer being direct about it to get it out of the way. What if I’d flirted with him and it turned out he wasn’t into dudes?”

You gulped picturing that scenario.

“What if we had another Woojin situation?” He asked, a seriousness to his tone as he eyed Chan. “You remember what he did to Felix when he found out? Because I’m sure Felix does.”

You noticed Felix grow quiet, pushing meat around with his chopsticks. Seungmin touched his wrist tenderly, thumb rubbing the side of his hand. Your heart hung heavy for him as you thought of your own encounter.

‘Don’t fucking touch me again, weirdo. I don’t want to catch whatever you have.’

“And what he said he’d do if we didn’t pay him out of his contract? We were lucky those accusations came out and we were able to stop him,” he continued. “What if YN wasn’t gay and he walks in on me and Han? Or Seungmin and Jeongin? Or Changbin and Hyunjin? Or any of us with one another? Okay, so it was a bit blunt to ask like this here, but it’s a fair question, hyung. I don’t want that happening again because we played the guessing game instead of asking.”

“But here, Minho? He’s only been here four or five hours.”

“Yeah, but I’d like to know if the rumors are true.”

“What if it turns out he is and fans found out before we did?” Hyunjin answered. “They only like the idea of shipping us because they think it’s not true. If it was, it could make things worse.”

“Alright, alright,” Chan conceded, “You guys are right, but still…”

“YN,” Changbin spoke up, seeing your uncomfortable shifting, “If you feel uncomfortable with this, we can talk about it later when we’re in the dorm.”

“I’d prefer that,” you answered honestly, suddenly aware of everyone watching you.

“Okay,” he nodded. “Later, then.”

The group dropped the subject, and Felix asked you about your BTS dance cover video. You thought about the inevitable confrontation later in your new dorm. Had you been picked because of those “rumors”? From what the other members said, their sexuality played a part in their future. You wondered why, but did not want to ask.

When you arrived at the dorm with your belongings later on, the group all sat in the living room as if waiting for you. Management said you’d be living with Jeongin and Seungmin since they had a spare room left, but it appeared the other members visited. Felix, Changbin and Hyunjin played a video game on the large television, while the other members talked on the couches.

In the privacy of their dorm, you saw the members’ interactions change. Minho and Han sat close together, giggling and talking quietly in their own world over drinks. Jeongin sat with his legs over Chan’s lap as the two played a game on their phones. Hyunjin sat between Changbin’s legs on the floor, clearly comfortable being so intimately close; Felix beside him between Seungmin’s knees, completely ignoring his advice in helping win the game. You’d never seen such closeness in the other groups. It appeared mildly affectionate and intimate in comparison to ZeroZeroOne or Goldeye.

“YN,” Chan noticed you first, detangling himself from Jeongin to meet you by the door, “I thought you were moving in tomorrow?”

“Management said I should move in as soon as possible,” you shrugged, “So then we can start bonding and stuff.”

He chuckled, “Alright, cool. I’ll show you where you’re sleeping.”

He brought you down a hall to a room that had a large bed and plenty of storage space with a television. The desk looked like a good place for your laptop and producing equipment; the space between bed and opposite wall might be big enough for some solo practices. A wide window, covered by white curtains, showed a high view of the city below. It was nicer than your previous dorms.

“What do you think?” he asked, sounding nervous.

“It’s nice,” you answered.

“Jeongin and Seungmin are good roomies, so you shouldn’t clash with them if you’re a quiet person.”

“I’m not particularly loud. I just work on music really.”

“Yeah, I saw you produce your own music on your Instagram,” he nodded. “You write a lot too, right?”

“I do. I wrote a lot of music for ZeroZeroOne.”

“That’s awesome. Maybe we can, you know, work on them in the studio sometime? We’re still putting together our album list for this comeback, so we can go over them. I think Stays will like seeing that you write and produce too.”

Your cheeks warmed at the idea of being included in such an integral part. You’d heard Stray Kids wrote their own songs, and that appealed to you. It seemed important to them.

“Look,” Chan said, coming further into the room, “I’m sorry about what happened in the cafeteria. I didn’t want them confronting you like that and making you think I only picked you for that reason. I didn’t.”

“It was still a factor.”

“The least important of them,” he insisted. “Minho had a point, but I didn’t want them scaring you off.”

“That Woojin guy really tried blackmailing you?”

“Yeah,” he sighed defeatedly. “He’d told the producers of our show he was gay to get into the group, so we thought he was like us. But then, Felix came onto him and, well, yeah. It didn’t end pretty. We were going to pay him until some people made accusations towards him, and the company got rid of him.” He hesitated, “I personally think JYPE paid those people to say that about him, since anything he said against us afterwards would be dismissed as retaliation and not a fact. But, we can keep that between us,” he said. He came over to you, “But…Are you really into guys?”

Nobody actually asked you before. Not your parents, who seemed to know and accept it. Not close friends, who may have suspected but preferred not breaching the subject. Not other trainees, who’d rather hit you than ask. The skeptic in you surveyed the leader from afar. Sincerity, anxiousness, and perhaps a bit of hope flashed in his eyes. Something about him made you comfortable to actually answer.

“Yeah, I am.”

He sighed in relief, “Oh, okay, cool. Great. Really great.” He swung his arms awkwardly, then said, “Um, so you can just get settled in and when you’re ready we can, you know, hang or whatever.”

You packed the few possessions you had from your last dorm into drawers. You finished setting up your computer and music equipment before going back into the living room. Jeongin had left Chan’s side to fix snacks in the open kitchen, which led to the leader patting the spot next to him. This was it. The awkward ‘getting-to-know-you’ phase every newbie suffers that first day. Staring around, the other members continued with their various activities. You thought of initiating conversation with one of them, but you couldn’t get the words out. The closer you became, the more leaving would hurt.

“Do you play games, YN?” Felix asked, plugging in an extra controller.

“Yeah,” you nodded.

“Awesome, me too,” he handed you the controller.

“He’s not great at it,” Chan told you, “But he’s got the spirit.”

“I’ve gotten better!” Felix said, blushing at the collective snickering. “You can play on my team. These guys have been ganging up on me.”

“I’m not the best at shooters, but I can attempt to help?” You didn’t want them thinking you lied about your gaming skills.

“Good, we can be bad together,” he smirked with another butterfly inducing wink.

“I bet you both can be very bad together,” sneered Hyunjin, the suggestion thick in his words. He laughed at Changbin’s nudging knee, “What? I meant in the game. Bunch of pervs…get your minds out of the gutter.”

“Maybe if you made some room in the gutter,” Changbin smiled, “We could join you, pretty,” he bent to kiss the crown of Hyunjin’s head.

“Do you have a boyfriend, YN?” Felix asked you, seeing you watching the couple.

“Huh?”

“A boyfriend,” he said. “Are you seeing anybody?”

“A boyfriend? Um, well, no,” you answered. “I dated a guy I was training with when I joined the company,” you admitted. “But then we broke up when he debuted.”

“Is that the only boyfriend you’ve had?”

“No, I’ve dated other guys.”

You realized this was the most you’d ever openly discussed your sexuality. Checking around the room, the others did not show a single ounce of disgust at your words. Nobody stood up to hit or throttle you. They had the same interest as a group of friends listening to a friend tell a story.

“But, it was in high school,” you continued. “When I started focusing on training, I didn’t date much.” Mostly to avoid detection rather than not wanting companionship.

“Neither did I,” said Chan. “I spent too much time working on my skills to seriously date anyone. I didn’t really have the time back then.” He paused, “That trainee…Did you really like him or was it just hooking up after practice or whatever?”

“I liked him,” you took a shot at Hyunjin, but missed and you hissed when he got a headshot. “But, it was a long time ago so I’m not stuck on him or anything anymore.”

You didn’t want to think about Jihwan. It hurt too much. You’d both come up in the trainee ranks together; you’d hoped to debut together in the same group, but it didn’t happen. They said you needed to work on your stage presence still and that your voice couldn’t hit the needed high notes. Jihwan didn’t like it either, but he really wanted to debut. Rather than keep a strain on the relationship, you both ended things. Your heart weighed down into your stomach thinking about Jihwan’s teary eyes, and how his voice cracked when he finally said it. All you’d wanted to do then was kiss his tears away; you wanted to tell him you’d always think of him.

It still hurts whenever you see him on television.

“Well, trust me,” Felix said, “You’ll be totally over Jihwan after you’ve spent some time with us. We’ve been told we’re a very horny bunch.”

“Too horny, sometimes,” muttered Chan. “I had to put a ban on studio sex because they kept getting distracted during recording,” he told you, sounding annoyed.

“That ban doesn’t apply to personal studios,” Changbin said, eyes on the screen. “Just so you know, YN.”

“Mine is always open,” said Han, “To my members.”

“If you keep talking like that, I’m getting the belt,” warned Minho, who typed on his phone.

“What?” Han said innocently. “I’m only telling him if he ever wants to talk about our music or anything else, my studio is always open. Don’t worry,” he pouted at Minho, “You know you’re my favorite hyung. I wouldn’t do it without you.”

“You better not, brat,” Minho chuckled, grabbing him and kissing his temple.

You couldn’t stop a giggle from coming out, nor the shyness in your smile. The idea you’d joined a group of guys who liked the same things as you sounded too good to be true. They’re surely messing around with you. There’s no way they actually mean anything they’re saying. This is probably their soft-initiation or a way of joking with the new guy. It wouldn’t be the first time.

They’re only joking.

****

“Oh yeah, he’s a pervert for sure.”

“You couldn’t possibly know that, Minho.”

“I’m telling you. It’s always the quiet ones. You weren’t there, Binnie.”

Chan managed tuning out his members’ conversation while he worked. He’d finally got the right melody for the track, but he wanted to rearrange things before sharing. As he put things together, your name pulled him from deep in his head.

“What was he doing?” asked Hyunjin from his seat on the couch.

“Jerking off.”

“In a hallway?!”

The picture came to Chan far too easily: you standing by the practice room door, hand in your shorts and mouth hanging open in your silent moans. Minho told everyone the story over group text (minus you), and his members could not have been more excited about it. A barrage of questions came once Han and Minho entered the studio the following day. You’ve only been with them a month now, and while you’d slowly integrated into the fold, there’d been things he forbade them to bring up. Clearly, talking openly about your sexuality still made you anxious and uncomfortable. He didn’t want you to leave the group because his members couldn’t keep their pants on.

“God, that’s actually super hot,” said Changbin, pulling out his own notes from his bag. “Do you think he’d do it in the gym? I’ve always wanted to do that.”

“Don’t ask him,” said Chan for what felt like the millionth time that month.

“I wouldn’t, but,” he smirked, “He did get a boner watching me in the gym.”

Another ‘YN-is-a-pervert’ story: Changbin invited you to work out with him and you had done your best to hide your erection from him afterwards. He claimed you’d gotten off in the showers. Chan gulped thickly. You in the shower, soap sliding down your body as you lathered your naked skin was a sinful image. He forced himself to focus on the music. It’s studio time. It’s recording time. He couldn’t let thoughts of your naked body writhing from his gentle touches cloud his thoughts.

“And you did not offer a hand, hyung?” Hyunjin teased.

“He sounded really into it, and I didn’t want to ruin his fun by catching him. The dude clams up the moment anyone mentions doing anything remotely gay with him,” Changbin said.

“Internalized homophobia,” said Minho, scrolling on his phone. “I think those groups kicked him out because they found out he was gay.”

“Oh, come on Minho-”

“-Explain how someone as talented as him hasn’t debuted?” He cut him off. “The dude is an all-rounder. He’d be any group’s Ace member. Yet, here he is, getting kicked out because he ‘didn’t fit in’? Give me a break. They probably found out about him, and dismissed him.”

“Poor guy,” said Changbin with a frown. “That must suck.”

“But we’ve shown we’re not like that,” said Jeongin from beside Hyunjin. “I’ve definitely shown it to him when I let him watch me get undressed.”

The tale of YN the Pervert continued with the newest installment. Jeongin said you’d walked in on him changing in the morning, and closed the door right away. Except, you did not close the door completely. Jeongin’s door was next to his bed which his mirror reflected. He said he caught you still looking through the crack in the door. Rather than shame you, Jeongin stripped completely and gave you something to watch. Chan wondered briefly if you liked watching more than participating. In that case, he’d perform for you whenever and with whoever you wanted.

Work time. Studio time. Not YN time.

“Maybe he thinks we’re baiting him?” Hyunjin suggested. “Like how straight guys will pretend to be gay and then beat the crap out of a gay guy?”

“He can’t possibly think that.”

“He thinks it’ll cause a scandal and he’ll get kicked out,” said Chan, wanting to end the conversation and all visions of you naked on his bed.

“What?”

“If he’s been kicked out for being gay before, he will likely do whatever he can to avoid it happening again so he can finally debut.”

Chan knew how that felt. He had to hide in the closet for most of his life, knowing to reveal his real sexuality would ruin his future. It still could if the wrong people found out. They’re lucky JYPE is good at cover-ups and has plenty of hush money. Chan didn’t seek out gay men because he wanted a little harem like the others joked. He did it to finally be himself. He doesn’t have to hide with his members; they don’t hide with him. In the privacy of their studios, practice rooms, and dorms, they can be themselves. He hoped you might sense that and get more comfortable. It appeared your issues went deeper than the rest.

“I wish I knew how to make him more comfortable with us,” said Hyunjin with a small frown. “Not for sex, but, you know, he’s one of us now. I’d like him to stay.”

“Stays are already so excited we’re getting a new member, even if they haven’t seen him,” said Minho. “It’d break their hearts if he left before they got a chance to meet him. He’s so sweet.”

Yes, you were. You were sweet, compassionate, gentle-hearted, and you loved what you did. Chan saw all the effort you put into everything you did. He’d gotten to listen to some of your originals, and you’d worked on them together to make them better. He particularly liked listening to your singing. You completing Vocalracha was a no brainer when they first heard you sing. Your soft, angelic voice reminded Chan of siren songs, drawing in the listener and enthralling them completely. He’d gotten into the habit of listening to your covers and originals while he worked out or laid in bed at night. It calmed him.

He wondered if your moans sounded as heavenly.

No, Chan. WORK TIME.

“Work time,” he said, clasping his hands. “Hyunjin, let’s start with your part.”

All conversation about you died in the wake of recording. He knew you’d be arriving soon to record your parts, then he’d be tortured by your beautiful voice and heart-melting eyes. He could at least use this time to get a good chunk of work done.

“We should throw him a party,” said Changbin, slumped on the couch beside Minho as he listened to Hyunjin’s recording. “After the comeback,” he continued when people looked at him, “To celebrate his debut. You know, take him out for dinner and drinks. Wine and dine him a little before we all kiss him.”

“Nobody is kissing him.”

“Unless he asks,” he added.

“Yeah, if he asks Chan first, then we can all kiss him,” Minho smirked at Chan’s back.

To kiss you would be the best part of the night. In his head, it didn’t lead to rough, feral sex. It led to passionate, slow, gentle sex on his bed. He’d take time memorizing your figure, making note of your sensitive zones to take advantage of later on. He’d keep you as comfortable as possible. The idea of bringing you to orgasm over and over made his mouth water. He sipped from his coffee with hopes the temperature cooled his warm cheeks. Still, Chan saw images of his lips on your nipples or his hands roaming your soft body. He heard your voice calling him ‘Daddy’ and begging for more of him. You’re the most beautiful man he’s ever seen, and he’s slept with both Hyunjin and Felix. Usually, when he thirsted after a guy, a quick hook up immediately took them out of his system. Yet, he suspected it’d be different with you. He knew once he tasted you, he’d want nobody else.

“You need a minute or two, bro?” Changbin laughed, seeing Chan pushing his tongue under his lip. “Don’t be embarrassed. He makes me hard too.”

“Hyunjin,” Chan called to the singer, pushing the booth button, “Let’s do those last two lines again.”

“I think he’s probably as perverted as you, Chan-hyung,” said Han. “If not more.”

“Impossible,” Jeongin said, “Nobody’s as pervy as our Channie-hyung.”

“Work time, please,” he said, focusing on Hyunjin’s voice and following along on his page.

“I wonder what kind of porn he watches,” Han mused out loud. “Unless he makes his own?”

“That’d be hot,” said Minho.

“Work. Time. Guys.”

“He can film me,” Jeongin admitted. “I don’t mind being watched.”

“Me neither,” Han agreed. “I can give him tons of smut conte-”

“-Okay, if you’re not recording right now, get out,” ordered Chan, trying not to envision holding up his phone as you rode him in bed.

No, not in bed. Let him pound you against a wall in front of the practice room mirrors. He’d bend you over gym equipment; fuck you in a pool, in a sauna, in a car or a public restroom. You’d suck him off in alleyways wearing a mini skirt and a crop top. You spread out on a couch, his cum leaking out of you after he’d blown his load inside you. He’d fuck you everywhere: In hotel rooms, on the beach, in the park, or in other people’s houses. Chan thought he might combust sitting there.

“I’m a producer,” argued Han.

“You can produce later,” he replied. “Go. Now.”

He’d love to be special to you. Chan liked the thought of going on dates with you just as much. You’d sit across from him, wearing one of your fluffy sweaters and giggling at something he said. He loved your laugh. It was the cutest thing. Cute coffee dates, walking along the river together, taking nature walks or sitting in the park on nice spring days became some of his favorite daydreams. Chan normally liked the simple hook up or a situationship, but you? He couldn't do that. Whenever you looked at him with those soft eyes of yours, he only wanted to cherish and protect you. You thought he didn’t know, but things get around in the industry.

“Do you really need a min-” Changbin began, trying not to laugh as the others left.

“No,” he said firmly. “Hyunjin, for the last line…”

He’d beat the crap out of Kim Beomgyu if he ever met him.

****

Debut day. You thought you’d had nervous days before, but this one topped them all. Standing in the bathroom stall, you took deep breaths to steady your racing heart. Sweat turns cold even in the black and red outfit the stylists put together for you. You hadn’t stepped a single foot out of the dressing room since management wanted to maintain their secret as long as possible. But, you heard the phantom screams and shouts of fans in your hand. You saw your own fans buzzing with theories that it might be you since they know you are a trainee at a big company. Everyone you know will be watching whether in person or at home. They will be carefully examining and critiquing Stray Kids’ new member. You already knew you’d be the center of attention in the interviews. Media coaching taught you what to say and how to say it; you were given the ‘sweet sunshine boy’ persona like Han and Felix. What if you couldn’t play that up well? What if fans did not cheer for you or didn’t like you?

A sick feeling swirled around in your stomach, making it harder to breathe.

“YN?” a gentle voice bounced through the empty bathroom. “Are you in here?”

You’re going to fail. You’re going to get kicked out regardless. The other shoe will inevitably drop and you’ll be back to square one.

“YN?”

Changbin. Embarrassment still lingered from a week ago when you’d gotten a raging hardon around him. You knew he’d heard you in your shower stall. Even with its own walls and glass door, it wasn’t exactly sound proof. He must think you’re such a creep. Beomgyu thought so too when it happened to him. One of the Goldeye members nearly hit you when he caught you watching him get undressed. If you get kicked out for anything, it’ll be that. It’s always that. You didn’t care what they claimed to be. Nobody in the Kpop industry is that open or unashamed.

“YN,” he said, standing outside your stall. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m going to fail.”

“What?” he asked in disbelief. “No, you’re not. Why do you think that?”

“I just will, okay? I screw up everything all the time. Everyone is going to see me, see that I’m not good, and want me gone.” The words made you feel worse when you finally said them.

You saw his shoes and imagined he leaned next to the door. “That’s not what I think,” he said, “And that’s not what the other members think. Management, Stays, and your fans don’t think that either. Stays haven’t seen your face, but they heard your voice in that promo we put out. They’re all really excited. People are already getting attached to you,” he chuckled softly. “You’re such an easy person to like.”

The door opened a second time. “Is he in here?” It was Chan. Out of everyone, you couldn’t cry in front of Chan. You already stumble all over yourself around him. “YN? What’s wrong?”

“He’s nervous.”

“I know you’re nervous,” he said, talking to you now. “I felt the same when we first debuted. I had wanted it for such a long time that I couldn’t believe it was really happening. I had all these doubts in my head: what if we did poorly? What if nobody liked us? What if we ended up disbanding and I was stuck back with trainees again?” The door opened a third time, but nobody spoke. “I know why you’re scared, YN, and that’s okay. I know what happened with Beomgyu-”

You nearly choked.

“We’re not like him. We’re not trying to trick you or prank you. We want you to be comfortable with us. We want you here, YN. We’re not going to let you go. I’m not going to let you go.”

“What if I’m terrible?”

“You’re going to do great,” Chan said. “Better than great. You’re so talented and passionate about what you do. Anyone who watches you can see how hard you work to hone your skills. You’re always practicing late, always asking to redo lines in songs, and constantly monitoring yourself at music video and photo shoots. You’re not only talented, you’re an…you’re an angel, YN,” he said with a nervous breath. “And people will see that once they get to know you.”

“You won’t know how people are going to react if you don’t go on stage,” said Seungmin. “Isn’t it better to know than to keep sitting in here worrying about it? At least if you go out, you’ll finally know.”

“Come on out,” Han said gently, knocking on the door playfully. “Please, YN? Please come dance with us. We promise we’ll get you anything you want afterwards.”

“Anything you want,” Hyunjin emphasized.

“Get out of there!” Changbin’s hand shot out from under the stall to your ankle. The sudden touch made you jump and giggle as he continued trying to reach you. “Come on,” he said, laughing to lighten the mood, “Get out!”

Two more hands joined in from either side, and you laughed as you jumped around to avoid them like crabs. You soon opened the door to their smiling faces. Chan stood at the forefront with a reassuring smile. His eyes crinkled in it, and you couldn’t get over his slight dimple. When he hugged you, you realized how comfortable his body was. You didn’t feel bothered at all when he lingered, because then you could put his hand placements to memory for later. The other members embraced you after, with Hyunjin being the last one.

“I mean it,” he said, a familiar glint in his eyes, “Anything you want, cutie.”

“Double for me,” said Felix.

They both winked this time, which completely crushed any nervousness inside you.

****

‘OMGGGG I knew it was YN!!! He did so amazing! #newStrayKid #Babysunshine’

‘The new guy’s super cute! I think I have a new bias haha sorry Hyunjinnie!’

‘The dancing? Amazing. The visuals? Gorgeous. The rapping? Awesome. THE VOCALS???!! OUT OF THIS WORLD!’

‘Oh my god, I need to know everything about YN RIGHT NOW!!’

‘His full name is (YLN YFN), he’s from Busan but he moved to Seoul when he started training with JYPE. He’s been a trainee for like seven or eight years now. He’s got a Tiktok and Instagram account where he posts originals and covers. He does all his own choreography, singing, producing, composing…’

‘Okay, hear me out: YN + Hyunjin + Felix = Modelracha’

‘Sirenracha is more like it! His vocals are so otherworldly to me!’

“See? I told you people would love you.”

You’d done it. You’d debuted. The high you’d ridden coming off stage continued on through dinner. To the world, you’d officially become part of Stray Kids. You remembered all the nerves fading out once the music started playing. The moment the spotlight hit you, the crowd cheered instead of booed. They chanted your name along with the other members, clearly having coordinated a spot for the newest Stray Kid. Back at your dorm, you couldn’t stop yourself from reading the comments underneath the comeback stage video. They’d even included your interview, where you told the MCs you were excited to show everyone your best side and make Stays proud. Your social media became flooded with congratulations, praises, and high hopes for your future. When you did the obligatory live broadcast, old fans wanted to talk to you and new fans wanted to know you. You had jitters at first, but when Hyunjin and Felix appeared in your live, you didn’t feel as nervous about it.

People also said you three looked incredible together.

“You had nothing to worry about,” Chan said, sitting next to you on the couch.

“It was still nerve wracking.”

“I know, but you’ve debuted now and you’re one of us.”

He looked at you with pride, and your insides squirmed. You didn’t realize how close you both sat together. The few drinks you had at the restaurant left you feeling looser. Recalling how Chan said he wished for you to be comfortable, you wanted to tell him you really felt that when you were next to him.

“YN, I need my partner,” Felix handed you a game controller.

“He doesn’t want to be alone in his failure,” Jeongin joked from beside Chan.

“I’m not that bad,” you defended, echoing Felix’s words that first night. “I’ve gotten better.”

“Keep telling yourself that,” Changbin laughed, settling into his usual spot with Hyunjin close by. “While I destroy you.”

For once, you fit in. Starting up the game, all the awkwardness you felt before melted away. You might not have been with them long, but no group or fellow trainees embraced you like they had done. If you’d debuted with ZeroZeroOne or Goldeye, you’d still feel casted aside. You played a few rounds with them, finding your place with them so easily. Things went smoothly until another topic came up.

“Do you like group sex, YN?” Seungmin had asked, handing you a bowl of popcorn to pick from. His question stunned you so much you hardly noticed the bowl.

“Seungmin!” Chan kicked him gently, even though the other members laughed. “You don’t ask stuff like that.”

“It’s bound to come up anyways!” said Seungmin, putting the bowl into his lap. "He’s already walked in on two of us fucking. He might as well know that we’re okay with him joining if he wants to.”

“You mean he’s going to walk in on you and Jeongin,” said Han, snuggling close to Minho in their couch corner, “And you want him to join you guys.”

The sudden change and acknowledgement swirled with the alcohol in your system. The thought came to you more than once, but you’d been so afraid to do anything about it. Every time you caught a member in a compromising way, you wanted to take full advantage of the moment. What might have happened if you’d gone into Changbin’s shower stall or closed the door behind you in Jeongin’s bedroom? Would giving into your desires truly be so bad?

“That's only because you’re a bunch of sluts,” said Changbin, scrolling through movies on the television. By his small smirk, you knew he’d done it to tease his members.

“That’s the teapot calling the kettle black,” said Hyunjin. “You can’t keep your hands off me ever.”

“How can I be expected to keep my hands off someone as beautiful as you, baby?” he grinned, kissing Hyunjin’s cheek, which made the man smile.

“I’m so sorry about them,” Chan told you, cheeks tinged a faint pink. “You don’t have to answer that at all. I swear we do more than sleep with each other all the time. That wasn’t important to me when I put the group together.”

“But it definitely happens,” chuckled Felix. He looked up at you, “A lot.”

“We are a group of young men who have very busy schedules and that comes with a lot of pressure,” said Hyunjin, leaning over to Felix so they looked at you together. You wished they had not. Sharp eyes blinked at you with a sultry stare that made your blood rush. “It’s only natural we’d want to relieve some of that stress with people we trust and we know care about us. Imagine if we hooked up with strangers and they went talking about the super kinky,” he glanced up and down your body, “Things we like.”

They then crawled over to you. You suddenly became hot in your hoodie, wishing you’d worn something else. Never in your life had you been approached by such beautiful men. Not even the hottest of supermodels could hold a candle to the two kneeling in front of you. You gulped thickly when they sat in front of you.

“You don’t have to be scared,” said Hyunjin, hand going up your leg gently. “You’re with friends. There’s no secret camera or anything around here. You can be yourself with us.”

“Unless you like being filmed?” asked Felix, starting to touch your opposite leg. You wished you’d worn looser pants. “I wouldn’t mind making movies with you.”

“Um, uh, well, um…”

“Don’t act so innocent now,” he laughed softly. “It's obvious that you’re a little pervert. How can we not do anything about that?” He let his fingers trail up your leg to your knee, the feeling sending more blood rushing to your core.

“Do you like to be called ‘Hyung’ in bed, YN?” Hyunjin asked, staying focused on you. “Or do you prefer something else?”

“Uh…” They were so beautiful and their fingertips drew closer to your knees and thighs. You hadn’t been properly fucked in years; not since Jihwan.

“You don’t have to worry,” Chan said, leaning over to you. “Felix and Hyunjin will be gentle with you if you’re a bottom. And they’ll be good boys if you’re a top.” He pushed a piece of hair from your face, looking down at your lips, “I personally like giving my boys as much pleasure as I can. I like watching them turn into whiny, whimpering messes from my touch,” he drew closer, “And my toys.”

“Hyung…” the title came out in a single breath.

“Let Felix and Hyunjin take care of you tonight,” he said. “When I fuck you, I want you to myself.”

The question came out before you stopped yourself, “Will you watch?”

“I’ll definitely be watching,” he replied with a soft grin. He moved from the couch to the coffee table in front of you three. “Tell them what you like,” he said gently. “They can’t take care of you if you don’t tell them.”

“I don’t mind being on top though,” you said quickly as both Hyunjin and Felix drew even closer. They each had a hand on your thighs, sliding your shorts up ever so slightly. “I’m not picky about it.” You became more aware of Chan watching than before.

“Good to know,” Felix said, deep voice dripping with lust. “Because I’ve been wondering what it’s like to ride you since we met.”

“Re-really?” you asked, breath getting heavier as fingers breached the hem of your shorts.

Both of them chuckled at your shyness. “Definitely,” he confirmed.

You noticed the others watching as intently as Chan did. Their attention brought flames to your cheeks, and only aroused you more. You’d never thought you’d be in this situation. Yes, you’d seen Han and Minho the other day, but you didn’t think this would happen.

“You don’t have to play shy with us,” said Felix, pushing your pant leg over your thigh. “Han told us all about the show he and Minho put on for you in the practice room. I can’t believe you jerked off in a hallway. Literally anyone could have seen you.”

“He told you about that?”

“You could’ve joined,” said Minho. “I wouldn’t have said no.”

“Me neither.”

That was when you noticed them entangled in one another. Han had one leg over Minho, his hand sliding into his pants while Minho groped his ass.

“And when you did it again in the gym locker room,” said Changbin, eyes shut as Seungmin and Jeongin slowly crept onto him. “Do you like public stuff? Please say ‘yes’.” His words made the others laugh.

“I mean…I guess?”

“Little pervert,” Hyunjin grinned. “If I’d known, I would’ve come on to you sooner. I love perverts,” he smirked, hand sliding over the inner part of your thigh. “They’re so much fun.”

“Let’s get this off you,” Felix said, hand leaving your thigh to the bottom of your hoodie. “I’ve been dying to see you without this.”

“Me too,” said Hyunjin.

You complied, and let the pair remove your hoodie and shirt. Chan sitting in front of you, he had a view of everything. Having his eyes on you in such a vulnerable state sent more blood rushing to your dick. You wished he’d come over and join you or take you somewhere to have you himself. But, Chan seemed content to watch on his own.

“I’m right here, baby,” he said, breathing deep as he rubbed himself through his shorts. “Just relax and get into it.”

Once exposed to him, Felix brought you closer by the chin. His lips made your arousal bloom in a single kiss, nurturing it as he gradually opened your mouth. The softest moan escaped you when his tongue slid over your own, rolling around with your mouths open for Hyunjin to see. With his fingers brushing close to your hardening cock, Hyunjin then turned you from Felix to plant his own passionate kisses. Felix’s hands rubbed down your smooth chest, tracing the line between your pecs before dancing to one nipple. One of your weakest spots.

“I see someone has very sensitive nipples,” he said in your ear before kissing underneath it. “I'm going to love touching these.”

He joined both you and Hyunjin in kissing. All three of you smacked each other’s lips and tongues in a three-way kiss. You couldn’t help whimpering as Felix teased your nipple with his fingers. You finally moaned when Hyunjin’s hand slid further into your shorts, moving over your boxers to your bulge. He lightly traced the outline forming underneath, starting from your balls to the twitching tip over and over. The languid pace drove you crazy, but you felt too shy to say anything.

The other pairs around you started letting out their own moans as clothes came off and kissing became more heated. When Felix started kissing down your neck and Hyunjin pulled away to focus on your groin, you saw Chan in front of you in the same position as before. He remained focused on your body, examining how the pair ignited the fire burning in your loins. The considerable bulge in his shorts made you drool. You’d do anything to have it deep in your throat, milking precum onto your tongue as you pleasured him.

Changbin had Seungmin and Jeongin straddling his thighs, both of them massaging his chest and crotch. They’d removed their shirts, which let Changbin switch between whose nipples he’d tease. Minho placed Han across the couch, pecking kisses down his exposed chest to the tent forming in his sweatpants. Is this what they did after shows? You knew you’d found your people. You knew you were where you belonged.

“Can I take it out?” Hyunjin asked you, cradling your balls in one hand. “Please, hyung?”

“Yes,” you breathed, eyes falling shut as Felix’s lips found your nipple. “Oh god, yes.”

The three of you groaned when he tugged down your shorts and underwear. Your dick sprung out onto your stomach, throbbing and twitching in front of them. Looking up at Chan, his mouth hung open in a low groan as he fully stroked himself now. You looked away shyly as the pair started grabbing at it. The touch nearly sent you spiraling. It had been way too long, and your body craved closeness. It craved intimacy from someone, anyone.

“Fuck,” Hyunjin huffed, holding you by the base. “It’s bigger than I thought it’d be,” he grinned at you.

“And thicker,” said Felix, capturing your lips in a deep kiss. “I can’t wait to ride it.”

You aren’t exactly a monster, but you did have a length that other guys liked. Looking down, you saw Hyunjin slowly stroking you while he admired it. You squirmed under him when he used both his hands, thumbs pressed to the underside of your tip each time he came up. That was when Felix removed his shirt, flinging it away to show you his sculpted body. Lean and slimmed down, he was jaw dropping. You lifted a shaky hand to his lower stomach, sliding upwards to his pecs which earned you a low hum. Brushing your thumb around one nipple, you felt it grow hard against the pad and saw Felix tremble when you touched the center.

“Lick them,” Chan said breathily. “I want you to-Oh yes, please.”

One arm wrapped around Felix’s waist, you kept him close as you slowly rolled your tongue around the nipple. Hyunjin’s hands produced thin droplets of precum, which he used to slicken your shaft. You shuddered at the tongue swatting at the slit, looking to see his pink tongue lap up what leaked out. Dark eyes met yours as he sunk the head between his pouty lips. Hyunjin’s mouth sparked nerves that made you bite your lower lip. You took in how his lips wrapped around it so easily, stretched to your girth and cheeks hollowing in each suck. The tiny moans he gave left small vibrations and you thought of grabbing his hair to push yourself further into his mouth. When he pulled away to remove his own shirt, you drooled over his slim body and imagined dark hickies across his unblemished skin.

As you teased each of Felix’s nipples, you couldn’t stop yourself from feeling down the rest of him. The sweatpants he wore did little to hide his arousal from you nor the curves of his perky ass. Due to his kneeling position, his nipples came nearly to level with you which meant his bulge touched close to you. Simply knowing his dick was so close had you salivating for it.

“Not so shy anymore, huh?” Felix chuckled. “Touch it. Pull down my pants and touch me, please.”

Untying the sweatpants, you tried hiding your eagerness. Even his dick was perfect. Going back to his hard, sensitive nipples, you slid the pants further until you felt the round cheeks of his ass.

“YN…”

You kissed from his chest to his navel, where his cock gradually began standing straight. It gave a small twitch, as if sensing your mouth close by and you went further. You gave the cheeks a gentle squeeze, the flesh molding to your fingers each time you spread them apart until you heard him groan. Felix’s hands fell into your hair, wanting you close to him as you reached his center. The tip of his dick leaked when you licked at it, straining to be in your mouth. But, Felix stayed perfectly still as you slowly took him between your lips. The blond shuddered when your hands started feeling up and down the backs of his thighs. He used your shoulders to steady himself while you licked up and down his shaft, his fingers digging into the muscles whenever you teased the tip.

“God, that’s so hot,” Hyunjin groaned, your cock still on his tongue before he sucked you again. “Not using his hands like that.”

“It feels so good,” Felix groaned in his deep voice. “Play with my ass, YN-hyung. Please.”

Not one to deny a beautiful boy anything, you started massaging closer to his hole. Fingers constantly rubbing over it, the hole fluttered against your fingertips each time. You took the chance to slide him deep into your mouth. Breathing through your nose, you slid him right to the back of your throat which made Felix’s head tilt back in a low groan. Your face buried in his groin, you focused on the entrance trying to suck a finger into it. Likely due to watching you do it, Hyunjin copied your move and sunk his mouth right to your base with soft choking sounds. This had you pull away from Felix, taking deep breaths and licking at him before taking him again. When you pushed a finger to the first knuckle, Felix wriggled in place. You kept pushing and withdrawing as you deep-throat his cock, driving Felix wild. The moment you finally sunk your finger to the last knuckle he started pushing into your face. You didn’t complain. You loved having this pretty, horny boy using your mouth as he wished. The grip he kept on your hair, his moans coming out breathy and deep, and his balls starting to slap your chin felt better than anything you had in a long time. You kept fingering his ass as he did this, feeling the walls clench around the digit each time you pressed to the hard mass deep inside. A second finger pushed in with the first, and Felix started shaking.

“Let me ride it, hyung,” he said hurriedly, pulling out of your mouth. “Fuck, I need to ride you right now.”

The pair pulled away and laid you on the couch. The three of you hastily removed the rest of your clothes before he straddled your hips. He spat on your cock, coating you in spit before pressing your tip to his entrance. You both groaned loudly in relief when you finally filled him to the brim. Felix, letting out a stream of uncontrollable moans, stayed planted on you a few seconds and grinded with you inside him. You joined in the grinding, pushing up into him before he started bouncing on his own. He looked beautiful. Cheeks flushed pink, blond strands falling in front of his face, wet cock bobbing in every push had you reaching out for him before Hyunjin sat on your chest, back facing you.

“Can I ride your tongue, hyung?” he asked in the most innocent voice, wriggling his ass at you. “Please?”

“Come closer.”

You thought you might cum right then. Resting above your head, Hyunjin placed himself on your chest so you could hook your arms around his thighs. You wouldn’t pass up the chance to feel up his gorgeous body as you kissed his plush bottom. Face buried in his ass, you traced the clenched hole in slow circles. Lovely moans joined Felix’s husky ones every time, becoming louder when you found his cock. The position made it hard to fully stroke him, but the bit that you stroked made Hyunjin push into your face. You slowly darted the tip of your tongue to the middle of his asshole, matching the pace of your jerking. Soon, Hyunjin carefully began sliding up and down on your outstretched tongue.

Felix’s ass clamped down around you, unable to slow down or control himself anymore. You throbbed in every stroke, pinned down by the both of them and helpless to fuck either of them back. They both sounded so pretty. It was like hearing your favorite song or listening to a good melody. You’d let them use you forever if it meant you could keep hearing them moan.

“I’m going to cum,” Felix huffed. “Oh god, I’m gonna cum. Make me cum, hyung. Make me cum, please, please, please!”

“You should see how pretty he looks when he cums,” said Hyunjin, who lifted himself off you.

Felix did look beautiful right on the edge. His cock leaked clear precum all over your lower stomach, and his hard muscles tensed as he drew closer. You grabbed onto his hips, fingers digging into the flesh, as he pushed up to meet him. The smacking of his ass to your balls became a rhythm you based your speed on. Full lips parted in every moan, eyes full of need and desperation, Felix looked more beautiful than anything you’d ever seen. His soft pleas for more of you drove you to go faster. You wanted him to cum. Soon, holding onto your arms tightly, Felix trembled and quivered on top of you.

“Cum on me,” you panted, watching Hyunjin kiss his neck and start jerking him off for added pleasure. “Go ahead, baby. Cum all over me.”

As if on command, thick white streams shot out from Felix and onto your stomach and chest. You loved the heat against your skin. You loved watching him lose complete control this final time, erotic and tantalizing even as he slowly came down from his peak.

“My turn,” Hyunjin smiled, bringing you up from your position.

You didn’t waste a second. Pushing him onto his back, head on a cushion, you kept his knees and thighs apart to plunge deep inside him. He felt just as good as Felix. Your dick reached deep, your tip pushing right to the prostate where the boy saw stars. Hyunjin held onto your arms, nails digging into your muscles as you lost yourself in him.

You couldn’t hold yourself back anymore. All pretense and shyness shed itself in every thrust. You’d let your new members see how horny they made you, and how you’d fuck them as much as they wanted. Hell, you’d be their fuck toy now. You’d be the biggest slut of them all. Their collective moans and groans became your sustenance. You looked down to see your dick splitting him open easily; his cock and balls laid right in front of you, dripping and bouncing with you.

Felix gently moved Hyunjin’s leg down to your waist, and grabbed his dick. “Suck him,” you said in a panting breath, desperate to watch them together. “Please, suck his dick while I fuck him.”

“Anything for you, hyung.”

You might have finished right there. Felix’s mouth around his cock, Hyunjin turned into a mewling mess with both of you working him. One hand still grabbing onto you, the other slid into Felix’s blond strands, though unable to move due to the overwhelming pleasure. Soon, like Felix, his body froze up. He looked just as gorgeous. Teeth biting down on his lower lip, his eyes squeezed shut as his orgasm approached. You couldn’t help but bring him as much pleasure as possible. Your own orgasm started building up in your gut and rolling closer to the edge. Lifting his legs, you changed the angle that finally pushed Hyunjin over.

“Hyung, hyung, hyung,” he said, “Fuck me. Oh please, fuck me!”

His cum, thin and white, leaked out of him like a fountain. It dripped over the sides to the base, where it pooled around the pelvic area. Felix licked small droplets, but otherwise let you see the effect you’d caused. Sucking some from the bottom, he fed Hyunjin bits of cum in slow kisses. When they both looked at you, smoldering eyes and wet tongues licking up excess fluids, you came. You came harder than you’d ever come before. Taking yourself out, you started stroking right as cum started flying out onto them. Both Hyunjin and Felix stuck out their tongues close to your cock, catching what they could and swallowing. It was the hottest thing you’d seen two guys do. You thought your climax might go on forever, especially when the pair prolonged it by taking over for you.

“You’re not done.”

Chan took hold of Felix’s hips and nearly threw him onto the free space onto the couch. This only made Felix giggle excitedly. You saw Chan had removed almost all his clothes, giving you an eyeful of his muscled body. His dick stuck upright to his sculpted stomach, leaking and flushed completely red. Felix bent over the back of the couch right away, his back arched and fingers digging into the furniture. Chan wasted no time in sliding right into Felix and began slamming his hips into the boy’s ass. You and Hyunjin watched in awe as Felix let Chan take him. Mouth open, eyes rolling back, Felix let out small moans. Chan kept his ass cheeks spread so you both saw him stretching the hole in each stroke. You grabbed yourself, stroking even if it brought on tingles of sensitivity, and imagined yourself in Felix’s place.

“Let me take care of that, hyung,” Hyunjin said, bringing you in for a kiss before replacing your hand. “They look good, don’t they?”

“Yeah,” you breathed, shifting due to the oversensitivity shooting through your cockhead.

“Don’t tell Binnie,” he leaned to your ear, “But Chan has an incredible dick. I can’t get enough of it once he starts fucking me.”

“When will he fuck me?” you asked, almost whining as you started growing hard again.

“Soon, I assume,” he replied, kissing your neck. “In the meantime,” he straddled your lap, letting you lean back against the couch, “You can fuck me whenever you like. All you have to do is ask and I’m on my knees, I promise.”

Seeing the rest of the room, you saw Jeongin bent over a stack of couch pillows with Changbin pounding him from behind, pulling his hair and slapping his ass until it turned pink. Seungmin stood in front of him, pushing his dick into the stationary Jeongin’s open mouth. You would’ve given anything to trade places with the youngest. You saw their hard cocks abusing him, going right to the hilt and you wished it was you. When Jeongin started shaking, Changbin changed his angle to make him moan louder.

Han went into a completely different world than the rest of you. Eyes closed, mouth open, he laid on his side with his arms to his chest. Minho, keeping his leg up, made sure the whole room saw him slowly pushing deep into him. From the mess on Han’s stomach, the man already came once. You wondered, as Hyunjin bounced in your lap, how many times they could make you cum. Ever since you’d seen them in the practice room, you wanted both of them.

It felt good being with people you could be yourself with. You never thought you’d belong anywhere. You never thought you’d debut or have a group or have fans or do what you’ve dreamed of.

You were no longer a newbie.

***

A/N: my first male!reader fic, I hope you guys liked it! Please reblog and like if you did, and feel free to send asks or comments about it <3 It keeps posts alive!

#stray kids #stray kids fanfiction #stray kids fanfic #bangchan #stray kids chan #lee felix #seo changbin #lee minho #han jisung #kim seungmin #yang jeongin #hwang hyunjin #stray kids x reader #stray kids x male reader #stray kids smut

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neuvistar · 1 year ago

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HONKAI STAR RAIL MEN AS FATHERS! pt one.

— featuring ┊jing yuan, blade, dan heng, gepard x fem!reader (all separate)

— warnings / content warnings ┊hsr men as fathers !! mostly fluff ! SPOILERS ON BLADE’S (?) PART, not proofread i think, you r married to them here, a little angst on blade’s but it’s nothing much, mentions of pregnancy, blade referred to as “ren”, them being absolute sweethearts </3 overall just fluff! | pt two. (luocha, welt, sampo) pt three. (aventurine, dr ratio, argenti, boothill, sunday gallagher)

— a/n ┊oh my days i’m sooo obsessed w these, i love thinking abt them too like okayyy.. strong jing yuan + gepard best father believer !! I ALREADY MADE A SEPARATE TAG 4 THIS TOO SO I CAN RAMBLE ABT IT W MY PRECIOUS FOLLOWERS, ANONS N MOOTS !! </3 you could tell i had fun writing gepards (i rlly did)

best papa #1. jing yuan (DILF DILF DILF!)

- JING YUAN would be such an amazing father, it’s like it’s natural to him, he’s one of the sweetest n most supportive ones !! when he found out about your pregnancy he would spin you around in his arms, kissing the temple of your forehead whispering “i love you”s under his breath. hes such a dilf too jesus fuck

- JING YUAN would have three kids (jesus christ) two girls n one boy, HE WOULD BE SUCH A GOOD DAD N I KNOW IT! he’s so patient and gentle with you during your pregnancy, and he was even more patient n gentle w his own kids, he loves them very much. he would be willing to teach his children everything, he would help them with their swordsmanship skills and even help out with other things, he’s such a good papa it hurts, he’s so gentle with your children, he’s an absolute natural! it’s like he was meant to be a dad almost

- JING YUAN who would be protective over his kids but not too protective, he loves seeing them all free, especially when they were just little cute babies. his eldest daughter loved running around his office, tugging at his clothes and asking him to play with her.

“dadddd! play with me noww! brother and sister wants to play too, we’ve been waiting for ten minutes like you said, but it already passed!”

“not now, princess.” his lips melted into a soft grin, giving his daughter a small pat on the head. “how about this, how about you and your siblings accompany daddy while he works, ‘that sound good?”

- JING YUAN who tries his best to make his children happy, i bet he’s the type to sing small little lullabies for them to help them sleep, rocking his little son in his arms as he has his small little fingers around his. he’s great with animals as well, he would take his children to a little adventure one day and have them hold and feed the birds that are always around him, nibbling on their tiny hands as he guides them, helping them try and feed it.

“go on, try and feed him. he doesn’t bite, he’s not scary either right? dad’s here to protect you, remember?

- JING YUAN who would talk to his children when they were still in your womb, telling them stories about his life, his adventures and telling them how beautiful their mommy was. jing yuan would consider this as his daily routine, he loved talking to his little ones even before they were born!

“hey princess. daddy loves you so much, y’know that?”

“daddy is excited to meet you too sweetheart, yes he is. but try not to give your mother a hard time, okay?“

best papa #2. blade

- BLADE who never thought he’d ever become a dad because of the life he lives, so much regret and grief in his heart so therefore he would start off a bit rocky, he was a bit unsure and didn’t quite understand the aspects of being a father and that worried him so much. he was terrified of not fulfilling his duties and responsibilities as a father but you always reassured him that he’s doing the best he can and that’s what truly matters.

“ren honey, she can’t support the weight of her own head, you know?”

“.. she can’t?”

oh boy.. he had a lot to learn.

- BLADE would probably have one kid! HE WOULD HAVE A DAUGHTER IM CONFIRMING THAT RN. your little princess is almost bound to look like him! she’s like a mini version of blade as she has the same hair, same eyes, etc! aaa it’s so cute! he thinks so too, he just doesn’t have the balls to actually admit it. his little princess would think of her papa as the strongest person in the world! it’s adorable honestly, she wants to be just like him, big and strong!

- BLADE who would be extremely overprotective over his daughter, he would have a very soft spot for her too. he would give everything his all to secure her knowledge about the current life he was living right now as a stellaron hunter, he knew he wasn’t the best, but he was willing to change for you and his child. yet, it still worried him. it still worried him that maybe one day his daughter will eventually find out about his past and follow his exact footsteps, everyday he prays nothing like that happens, he wants her to do good, not bad. he doesn’t want her to fall in the same path he went before.

- BLADE who honestly didn’t expect to have a child himself, so when he was caught right handed carrying a small little child in his arms, kafka and silver wolf would doubt him at first, asking him if this was just another child he found in the middle of the streets, shocked to find out he was acc a father n he wasn’t messing w their heads again skull emoji

“that’s.. that’s your kid?!”

“yeah.”

“she looks just like you..”

“are you sure you aren’t messing with us? you actually had sex?!”

“.. could you have worded that a better way?”

- BLADE who would find comfort in his own family, making a promise to himself that he would absolutely devote his love to you and his little princess, he would do everything to protect you and her, even if it means risking his everything for the both of you. but yet.. he still thinks about how he’ll eventually watch you and his little princess die while he lives on, for eternity. he wants to bask in the presence of his beloveds for as long as he could, he would break the curse of his immortality if he could, just so he see his loved ones die, no.. not again. he can’t afford to see the two most important people of his life die, once again. but he knew, his fear would come true eventually.

best papa #3. dan heng

- DAN HENG is a SWEETHEART. tbh hes a a lil confused but he’s trying + he’s learning! he also never expected he would ever have a child of his own, he doubted his own abilities at first but he got the hang of it as it flows through, he’s an outstanding father too! he’s just a lil confused but he’s got the spirit

- DAN HENG would probably have multiple kids, about two! one girl and one boy. when his first child was born, he felt a wave of happiness and relief wash through his body as he was finally taking in one of the biggest responsibilities there is, he promised himself he would do his best for you and his kids, and he really kept his promise! he does try his best and tries his hardest to give them the utmost care and support, he loves his pretty wife and his kids sm and it shows

- DAN HENG would have good hearing! when his young ones were still little babies, he would usually be the first one to aid them whenever they wake up in the middle of the night crying, gently rocking them in his arms until they fall asleep in his arms, their small hands on his shirt. so cute <3

- DAN HENG who would help his kids fall asleep by sitting or laying by their side and watch them sleep, maybe he would hum a tone or two.. he just can’t comprehend the fact that he was the father of these kids, he treasures them sm and you notice it, he’s just so so sweet to you and your kids

“dan heng?” you would call, entering the room of your kids before seeing your husband laying on the edge of the bed, arm over the two young ones as a gentle grin forms on your face as you shut the door, god. you married the right man.

- DAN HENG who just wants the best for his kids, he would come off as too overprotective sometimes and it might look like he was angry but in reality he just wants the best for them and wants to keep them safe.

“i thought i told the both of you not to go there.”

“.. but daddy you didn’t say that! that’s no fair!”

dan heng crouched down to his daughter’s level, eyeing her and his son down. “daddy doesn’t want you both to get into trouble. plus, you could easily get hurt or stepped on from some big monster.”

“dan heng, stop scaring the kids.” you crossed your arms, before a tug on your shirt was made,

“no no mommy, it’s not scary! because we know that daddy is always gonna be there to save us!” dan heng grinned, pulling his two younglings in a tight hug. he really does hope he can fulfill that, he wants to be there for them after all.

best papa #4. gepard landau

- GEPARD is such a girl dad, he would have three little princesses! gepard is surprisingly a good dad, like i said he’s a such a girl dad he would cherish and love his princesses (including you <3) until the end of time, he’s such a good dad it makes my heart melt, he would probably ramble about the fact he has three daughters to serval, HES SOOO SWEET ABT IT TOO. “mhm mhm. i have three princesses in my household!” is what he would say, he loves his daughters smmm HES A GIRL DAD U CANNOT TRLL ME OTHERWISE. speaking of serval, she would be an amazing aunt i know it!

- GEPARD is such a loving and doting father! when his first daughter was born he probably thanked every star in the whole universe for this amazing gift that was brought upon him and you, HE LOVES YOU AND HIS DAUGHTERS SM BRO. he can be a bit overprotective and it might lead him to seem a bit controlling but he doesn’t mean to be or sound controlling in the first place, it’s only because he wants his daughters to be safe, he knows how bad the world can be and he doesn’t want anything to happen to them.

- GEPARD who is willing to style his daughters’ hair, honestly you wondered where he inherited his skills from since he’s such a natural at it! (he got it from serval) sometimes you’ll even see one of your daughters in cute little pigtails held up in cute little pink bows, it’s so adorable to you!

“who did your hair baby? it looks great today.”

“daddy did!” when she said that, gepard would probably be eavesdropping from the kitchen, a huge stupid smile on his face <3

- GEPARD who does his best to protect his wife and his children, sometimes you would tell stories to your kids about how amazing gepard really is, and how he’s the captain of the silvermane guards! i bet if they still had fears over little things like monsters under their beds etc your daughters would always go to gepard so he can “fight” the monsters off, gepard finds it so adorable how go to him whenever they’re scared, because he knows he can protect them from anything <3

- GEPARD probably has a daughter that looks up to him a lot, trying to follow in his footsteps. when his little daughter was little, she would sometimes sneak out from her room and sometimes catch him training, doing weird motions with his hands she didn’t quite get and copy him! she views gepard as “the strongest hero in the whole universe”

“daddy daddy! look look, it’s a drawing of me in your armour! one day i’ll be just like you, brave and strong!”

the blonde’s gaze softened, a low chuckle leaving his chest as he picked her up from the ground planting a quick kiss on her nose. “you’re already brave and strong, princess. you’re just as brave and strong as daddy is”

he’s such a girl dad ugh i love those men

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narizaki · 5 months ago

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bad habits suna rintaro x reader

― tags gender neutral reader, fluff, childhood friends to lovers

― notes wc is around 1.2k, maybe ooc suna, thank you for 100 followers, here's my gift to you <3

rintaro has many bad habits.

he’s well aware of them — so much so that he has a mental list of them. number 5 on the list is how he gets lazy during volleyball matches whenever he knows his team is in the lead. number 4 is how he never bothers to even attempt to mediate fights. though, he figures that one hardly counts as a bad habit, seeing as it’s the result of spending years around the miya twins. they would rather die than let anyone but kita or their mother get in between of their debacles.

“tell me a secret, rin,” you hum into the phone.

you and rintaro have ingrained late-night phone calls into your routines after graduating high school and separating your own ways. with him working as a professional volleyball player, you hardly see each other anymore. he's always too busy with traveling and training, despite the fact you still live in the same city. although he knows you’d never tell him, he’s aware that you were upset when he began to have less and less time to talk to you. after all, he hadn’t spent the majority of his life with you to not know what makes you tick.

so, even though he’s stumbling over his own feet walking home, he’s still on the phone with you. he vaguely understands what you say before spouting out the first thing he thinks of — another bad habit of his.

number 3: he loses his filter when he’s tired.

rintaro never had much of a filter to begin with, but his reserved nature essentially acted as one. he was certainly less blunt than people like kita and atsumu. as the years passed, though, it was made apparent to him that he became more curt with his words when in dire need of rest. he surmises that it’s something that happens to everybody, though, so he forgives himself for it.

“you know, i used to like you when we were kids,” he mumbles. “actually, it lasted until high school.”

you sputter on the other end, choking on your water. rintaro laughs at your incessant coughing.

“that was not funny! and, what? suna rintaro, are you drunk right now?” you yell into the receiver. the volume of your voice makes him wince, forcing him to tug his phone away from his ear. regardless, he laughs a little harder.

“full name? what happened to rin?” he almost whines, kicking a rock. you grumble on the other line. “and i’m not drunk.”

“rin,” you sigh, and he smiles at the nickname. “i know you like to fuck around with people, or whatever, but this isn’t something to joke about.” your tone is serious, almost scolding. rintaro only frowns. he’s not lying. he wouldn’t lie about something like this. he couldn’t, especially to you.

“i’m not joking, i swear. i did like you… or, still do?” he thinks aloud, questioning himself. rintaro is barely registering what he’s saying — mind fuzzy from the harsh day. his coach was particularly unforgiving today, leaving him sore and tired as he drags his feet back to his apartment. still, he continues. “yeah, still do, actually.”

“rin,” you say, exasperated, “you like me? as a friend, you mean?”

even in his slightly delirious state, rintaro can tell you’re trying to save face — for you or for him, he’s unsure. what he does know is that you’d never thought he’d see you in a romantic light. it was his fault, really — you’d always been a hopeless romantic, but rintaro knew you’d considered him off-limits. aside from your long-term friendship, there was also his disinterested approach to dating.

if only you knew how wrong you were.

he was never uninterested in dating — he just always had his eyes on you. that was where another bad habit of his shone through — number 2: he never tells anyone, anything. that, mixed with his hard-to-read demeanor, meant that nobody truly knew how he felt about you. of course, those around him could tell that you were close. everybody knew that you and rintaro had grown up together, so it was only a matter of time until people started assuming that the two of you had something more. while rintaro never gave those people the time of day, you’d always nervously deny their pries.

atsumu and osamu would always tease him (and sometimes, you) about it, but they quickly learned to give up once they saw his feigned indifference toward the subject and your immediate rejection to their statements. his default response was to brush them off — he’d rather die than give the twins out of all people anything to use against him, especially if it was about you. he’d never see the light of day again if miya atsumu was found teasing rintaro about something.

“rin? hello?” your voice echoes throughout his head, forcing rintaro into reality.

“yeah, sorry,” he mumbles. he’s considering taking his word back — telling you that yeah, he does mean it as a friend. but he decides that he’s already too deep in and fuck it, he’s going to tell you.

“i do like you…more than a friend. i have for a while, and i know it’s my fault that you had no idea, but i guess i’m telling you now?” rintaro grimaces at the uncertainty in his own voice. he’d always been so sure of himself — or, at least put effort into appearing as such. you’ve always been the exception to that, though, and he supposes that’s a fact that’ll never change.

a beat of silence passes until you reply.

“yeah. it is your fault.” you breathe.

suddenly, all the air is gone from rintaro’s lungs. it forces him to stop in the middle of the sidewalk, shoes skidding against the concrete. his grip on his phone tightens, and he’s considering mumbling out some half-assed excuse about how he is, in fact, drunk. he’ll pray that you believe him, so he can run back to his apartment and maybe actually get drunk before pretending that everything is okay.

thousands of thoughts run through his head. some of them are about how he’s going to play this off, while others are about where you stand with him now. is this what being a setter feels like? having to go through hundreds of different situations to decide what will bring the best outcome? how shitty. he vaguely feels sympathy for atsumu.

that is, until your laugh fills the air around him.

“but you’ve told me now, so i think you should turn around.”

he spins on his heel, coming face-to-face with you. your appearance is disheveled, looking as if you just ran to him — which, you did, based on the harsh breaths you’re taking — and you only have a thin t-shirt and sweatpants on. your phone is still by your ear, grinning at him. it’s childish and hopeful, reminding rintaro of the smiles you would send his way when the two of you would play on the swings during recess. he adored them just as much then as he does now.

rintaro has many bad habits. he’s aware of them, and despite what others may say, he’s come to terms with them.

but as he rushes forward and cups your face into his hands, he knows what he’d say if someone were to ask him what his worst habit was.

number 1: he can never say no to you.

#haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #haikyuu fluff #hq fluff #suna rintaro x reader #suna x reader #suna fluff #suna rintaro fluff #suna rintarou x reader #suna rintarou fluff

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hellfirenacht · 1 year ago

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Clean (Eddie Munson x Reader)

Summary: After the battle in the Upside Down, you and Eddie try and get clean.

Tags: Angst, hurt/comfort, smut, happy ending, no use of y/n, reader is not described, unprotected PiV sex, light choking, pet name, barely beta'd

7.7k words

You weren’t completely sure how you ended up back in the right side up, in your home with Eddie. After the fight with Vecna, everything was a blur. You remembered sirens, and an earthquake, and you and Eddie being arrested, refusing to be separated from each other but being forced apart anyway. You remember being bailed out somehow, Eddie’s name being cleared and waiting outside the police station for hours until he stumbled out and looked at you.

Both of you stared at each other for a long time outside the station, battered and bruised and covered in cuts and bite marks, but alive. It was a fucking miracle considering Eddie had thrown himself into a suicide mission. He’d run, distracted the bats and had you not managed to grab him and tackle him into another trailer he’d be dead, you were sure of it.

Looking at him outside of the station, you were about ready to kill him yourself. Your eyes burned with tears and if looks could kill, he’d be dust. It took everything not to slug him right then and there for daring to think that he could throw his life away like that, for a town that hated him.

How could you? Your look said.

I’m sorry. Came the silent reply as he dared to take a step closer. When you didn’t step back, his arms wrapped around you tightly.

The two of you held each other for a long moment, and each passing second your anger dissolved as the emotions you’d been ignoring and repressing over the past few days started to surface. You couldn’t do this here. You couldn’t allow yourself to process this outside of the police station, not when the two of you were covered in sweat and blood.

His hand gripped yours tightly, as if you were the last lifeline he had in this world. There was so much more that needed to be done. He had to tell his uncle he was alive, you had to check on Max and the others, Eddie probably needed some sort of lawyer. You had to see Steve and Robin and see what happened with Vecna while the two of you were in holding.

But it was late, nearly midnight and neither of you had a walkie talkie anymore and the weight of what the two of you had been through was starting to catch up.

Your apartment was small, cozy even. Eddie walked in with you, having followed you blindly back home. You couldn’t let him go, even when you dropped his hand to get you both some water from the kitchen you were constantly looking over your shoulder to make sure that he was still there, that he was still real.

The whole time, he was looking at you, too.

The two of you sat on your bed, hands clasped together tightly as you both tried to figure out what to say or do. You’d won, Vecna was dead and the gates were closed. You were alive, Eddie was alive and his name was cleared. If this was Eddie’s campaign, you two would be heroes, celebrating and drinking and would be standing tall and proud.

Instead, the two of you were holding hands on your bed. Staring down at the floor as you both tried to sort through the horrors you’d seen in the past four days. Your eyes closed, and you saw everything; the news of Eddie being suspected of murder, the bats attacking, the upside down, Eddie’s back as he ran away-

A tear slid down your cheek and you gripped his hand harder, and in response he squeezed back. You took a deep, slow breath-

“We... stink.” You weren’t sure you meant to say that out loud but it broke the silence between the two of you. Eddie was silent for a few seconds before letting out a breath that almost counted for a laugh.

“Yeah... yeah we probably do. I haven’t showered in... shit. I don’t want to think about it.” He said.

“We should shower.” You said, not meaning anything by it.

“We should.”

The two of you were quiet for another few minutes, neither of you moving. Having Eddie out of your site, even though you knew he’d be in a room that he wouldn’t be able to disappear in, made your stomach twist unpleasantly.

But he needed a shower, he fucking deserved to hog all the hot water he wanted after what he’d been through. So you stood up, still holding his hand. “I’ll... show you how the shower works.”

He followed you wordlessly to the bathroom, and you rummaged through your cabinet and pulled out a spare toothbrush for him. Eddie grabbed it and the two of you made your way over to the sink, brushing your teeth as the first step to feeling like a human again.

“The left one is the hot water.” you said, turning the shower on for him. “And this button makes it a shower and not a bath.”

He was staring at you, and you had the feeling that what you were saying was the least important thing going through his mind right now. You didn’t blame him.

“There’s clean towels right there.” you pointed to the towels on the hooks by the sink.

The water ran, and it was already starting to get a bit foggy in the bathroom. You turned to look at Eddie, who was still staring at you. His mouth partially opened as if he wanted to say something but for once lacking the words.

“Take all the time you need.” you said, and started towards the door. His hand grabbed yours, stopping you from moving forward.

“I...” Eddie said, his large doe eyes were looking at yours with a million different emotions. He didn’t want you to go. You didn’t want to leave.

There had been an underlying tension between the two of you through this whole week. From the finale of his campaign with Hellfire to you saving his life there was something there. You would have always easily admitted that you found Eddie attractive but had never let yourself move past that.

The moment that he’d disappeared, you felt like your world had blacked out, only returning to your senses when he’d had you pinned against the wall of Reefer Rick’s boathouse with a broken beer bottle against your throat. You’ll never forget the fear in his eyes, like a wild animal cornered as the glass poked at your neck as his gaze darted between you and the others.

What a terrible time to realize that you might be in love with Eddie Munson.

You had been swallowing your emotions all week, focusing on the task at hand. Dustin brought Eddie junk food, you made sure there was something of substance in the grocery run. At least something that he could heat up so he wasn’t surviving on pure sugar. When the others were busy trying to piece together Vecna, you’d kept your own walkie close, updating him every step of the way.

You don’t know what would have happened if you hadn’t shown up to Reefer Ricks as the basketball team seared for Eddie. You’d given him just enough time to escape without suspicion, and as thanks you had been witness to the gruesome murder of Patrick in the water of Rick’s boathouse.

The memory was pushed down as far as you could, and you were brought back to reality by Eddie taking a hesitant step closer. You had never realized how badly you needed him in your life, the freak who’d given you a place to feel safe in a town where a toe outside of normalcy was seen as a crime.

You needed him, and by the look in his eyes, he needed you, too.

There wasn’t anything to say, words wouldn’t do anything in a time where actions meant everything. So you squeezed his hand and pulled it away, reaching up to his shoulders to start pushing off both his battle jacket and leather jacket. The heavy garments fell to the floor and he pushed them away with his foot to a corner. You reached up and pulled off his bandana, freeing his hair and tossing it as well.

Eddie kneeled down and unlaced his shoes, as well as yours. Your shoes and socks were both discarded as he stood back up. You took his hand again, removing each of his rings carefully followed by his bracelet and watch and setting them on the counter. There was blood in the mouth of the pig ring that made your stomach turn and you looked back at Eddie instead.

His Hellfire shirt was stained with blood and sweat and god knows what else, and he discarded it quickly. Small cuts and bruises littered his body, and you looked over each visible wound. Distress filled you, and you swallowed hard, trying not to think about the bats attacking and biting him just hours before. You’d been so strong up until now for him, and you’d be strong again until you could finally be alone.

You weren’t expecting him to cup your jaw and tilt your head up to look at him. His brown eyes looked straight into your own and he leaned forward, pressing his forehead against yours. Your eyes slid close, one of his hands moving to the back of your neck. You could feel the warmth of his skin, the slightly scratchy callouses of his fingertips, the way his hand would squeeze slightly on reflex reminding you that he was here and safe.

Safe.

That thought alone nearly broke you as it passed through your mind. Eddie was safe, and he wasn’t dead and he wasn’t going to jail for murder. He was alive and cleared and free.

You let out a choked sob and tried again to push down everything you were feeling but his hand squeezed tighter and his other hand wrapped around your middle and pulled you close. You let out a shuddering sob against his chest, holding his arm for dear life as you tried to calm yourself.

It’s... really hard to cry with the scent of blood and sweat and boy filling your nose and shocking your senses.

You met his eyes as you pulled away, but his hands remained firm on you, keeping you grounded. Eddie’s eyes were red and bloodshot, both of you were exhausted.

Just hold it together. You said to yourself as you pulled your shirt off over your head, and fought with the button on your jeans. Eddie reached down to help you, his thumbs brushing over the bruise on your hand you’d earned from punching a demobat. You stepped out of your pants and reached for his, dropping the bullet belt on the ground which echoed with an alarming clang.

“Jesus.” Eddie muttered.

“Why did Erica even grab that?” you asked, as you both stared at it. “Those bullets don’t even work with Nancy’s gun.”

It was a question without an answer, one of thousands from this week.

You went back to his pants, pulling on the belt and.. Well that didn’t work. There was a handcuff around his belt that you tugged on. You’d noticed it before a few times, and had always wanted to question this particular fashion choice. But you never did, not wanting him to know that you had ever glanced at his crotch, no matter how innocent the circumstances.

“Here, it’s uh... a little fiddly.” Eddie said, moving your hands away as he jiggled the cuff and it opened with a metallic click. You reached out again, removing the offending item and hesitated for a moment as your thumb and forefinger held onto his zipper.

You looked up at him. Are you sure? He nodded and you pulled down his pants, leaving you both in your underwear.

A gentle push on your shoulder had you turning around as he unclasped your bra, letting it join the rest of the discarded clothes before you slid your fingers into your underwear and pulled them down before you lost the nerve.

You could hear Eddie let out a shuddering breath and when you turned around there was a red flush underneath the layer of dirt on his face. But he didn’t look down at you, not yet, only focusing on your eyes as he also pulled down his boxers.

Neither of you made a move, only staring up at one another for a long time as the water ran. You took in every detail of his face, as if this was the first and last time you’d seen him. His long hair was a greasy mess, his fringe plastered to his forehead and covered in sweat. Dirt and blood speckled his face and there was a cut on his cheek.

How were his eyes so impossibly round and expressive? You had no idea how he could wear every emotion on his face and yet still not have a clue what he was thinking. You two stood naked in the bathroom, something that would have been laughable to imagine just a few weeks ago, but now it was the least crazy thing that had happened to you in even twelve hours.

Eddie made the first move, carefully placing his hand on your lower back and pushing you towards the shower. You stepped in, Eddie right behind you as the hot water hit your skin. You let out a hiss as it hit a cut on your shoulder, but other than that it felt... fucking amazing.

You reached out of the shower to the sink to grab the antibacterial soap that Eddie had left at your place months before after getting the black widow on his chest done. Your mind flashed to him leaning against the counter with his shirt off as you had carefully cleaned the fresh ink. He’d been making a fuss about how it burned and you had scolded him for going to a shady scratcher’s basement and that he was lucky that he didn’t get an infection.

Had that only been a few months ago?

Now his tattoo was healed, but there were new wounds to tend to, new permanent fixtures on his body that you wish were just from an illegal tattoo gun. You grabbed a clean washcloth and finally looked over his body.

It wasn’t like it was your first time seeing a man naked, and you’d seen Eddie shirtless plenty of times before. There was no denying this was different though, and your eyes wandered down between his legs for just a moment, curiosity getting the better of you in the moment because it was better than letting your mind stay trapped in the Upside Down.

He wasn’t hard. You didn’t blame him, you doubted you could get aroused in this state. You were both tired and gross. You pulled your focus away from his crotch and back to the washcloth, lathering it up and began to wash his shoulders and neck first.

Eddie’s hands made their way to your hips, unable to stop himself from touching you. Touching you meant that you both were real.

He let out a small noise in the back of his throat as you began to gently wash away the gime on his neck and shoulders. Dirt and sweat flowed down each of your bodies from the water stream, and you focused as best you could on cleaning each of the cuts on his body, even if he let out grunts of discomfort.

Your hands started washing lower, running the cloth against his chest and the black widow you’d cleaned a dozen times for him before. Eddie hissed as the cloth brushed over his hard nipples and you couldn’t tell if it was because it felt good or didn’t. You moved lower, washing his stomach and his hands held your hips tighter. It was becoming a game of chicken to see how far down you’d go.

You were staring at his dick as your hands hovered at his hip bones. It’s not like you could help it, well, that was a lie, you probably could. But it had twitched just slightly, and your mind had raced with a thousand dirty thoughts.

Not the time. You scolded yourself as you tried to figure out how to proceed.

Sensing your hesitation, Eddie reached behind you for another washcloth and turned you around.

“It.. might be better if I do this part.” he said in your ear and your skin erupted in goosebumps. “Between the lake water and the sweat and everything, yeah. Just, give me a second to do that part myself.”

Jesus Christ, he was talking about washing his ass and your body had still reacted. What the fuck was wrong with you? Well other than falling in love with your friend and Dungeon Master, nearly losing him to monsters, nearly losing him again to the justice system-

Something soft rubbed your back and the tension you’d been holding suddenly evaporated. While you were distracted, Eddie had finished his own business and had grabbed your loofah. He was washing your back in slow circles, getting the dirt off of you as well.

You let out a quiet noise and his hand froze for just a moment before resuming. Maybe in another timeline you would have been embarrassed about the noise you made, but not this time. Not when you were touch starved from him, not when he was naked and touching you, not when you two felt impossibly close and yet still so fucking far apart. It was a balancing act, a dance that neither of you knew the music to. Each movement was careful, hesitant, as if one wrong move might scare the other away.

There will be no more retreating from Eddie, the Banished. Did that extend to you? With the way his fingers slid down your spine you were assuming so. One hand was firmly on your shoulder to keep you in place (as if you were ever going to move away) while the other ran your loofah over your sides.

He turned you around, endlessly deep brown eyes meeting yours while his hand holding the loofa twitched just slightly. It was his turn to look down at your body fully, eyes raking down over your chest, your hips, and your legs. You saw his Adam’s apple bob up and down as he swallowed, looking back up at your eyes.

When you gave him a nod, Eddie reached out again, working the loofah over your neck and shoulders. You tilted your head back, letting him get as much grime off you as possible before his hand moved lower, running over your breasts carefully. Eddie’s eyes darted between your chest and your face for any sign that this was too much, that he’d gone too far. But you only leaned closed to him, resting your hands on his forearms as he washed you. His hands drifted lower, not lingering too much on your breasts when getting clean was more important than the hormones that were starting to stir in both of you.

Just like you had, his hands stopped at your hips, just above your mound. You turned him around the same way he had for you, deciding that you could also wash your own ass for the time being.

You closed your eyes as you washed yourself, imagining a world where taking a shower with Eddie wasn’t the result of a week of trauma. Maybe he’d joke about how he’d make your tits squeaky clean and you’d respond with a joke about him dropping the soap. Maybe in another life the two of you would be blasting music and he’d be rambling about the latest song he was learning on guitar while you two swapped off who was under the hot water.

Your bodies were clean now, Eddie taking the free moment to wash off his legs and feet while you did the same. You pulled him back around and reached up to his face with a warmed washcloth, and his hands went back to your hips. Once you were satisfied with that, you grabbed the shampoo and conditioner.

“Sit down.” you said quietly.

The tub was comfortable enough for one person to lay in and stretch out but it was more cramped with two. Eddie sat down and you sat behind him, working the shampoo through his hair slowly, your fingers digging into his scalp. Eddie tilted his head back and let out a moan as you massaged and scratched at his head.

There was a small part of you that said that you shouldn’t be having a reaction to this, that you two had just gone through something terrible and this wasn’t the time to unpack those feelings.

You told that part of your brain to shove it.

You peered over Eddie’s shoulder as you worked the lather through his hair, and took in a deep shuddering breath as your gaze was met with his cock standing at full attention. The warmth inside of you was growing as well, made hotter by his constant groans and murmurs of enjoyment.

You rinsed his hair, and started working the conditioner through his ends.

“Let that sit for a bit.” you instructed and he made a noise of understanding. You quickly worked on cleaning your own hair, and as the last of the sweat, blood, and tears slid down the drain you were now faced with it being just the two of you, naked, raw, and alive.

Eddie turned around and leaned against the back of the tub and he wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you in as well. He pressed your back against his chest, his head resting on your shoulder. You leaned back into him, letting him hold you as the warm water washed over you both.

Your hands reached down to his, and his fingers immediately laced with yours. Around you there was only the thick steamy air and the warmth and safety of the shower. Your fingers rubbed against his, unused to the bare skin without the heavy metal rings he wore. You wondered briefly if they were silver or pewter or some other metal.

Something soft on your shoulder brought you back to reality, A shiver ran down your back as Eddie’s lips placed small kisses along your clean, wet skin. You squeezed his hand, and he squeezed back.

The kisses stopped after a moment, and he pulled you closer until you were completely flushed against him. His cock was pressing into your back, and you felt him shift his hips to try and find a way to have you close without bothering you about his physical reaction.

You shifted in his arms, turning around to face him. The porcelain dug into your knees, but you ignored it to look at Eddie. His eyes were wide and everything stood still. He reached for you again, placing his hand on your jaw, his thumb resting on your cheek. In return you held onto his shoulders, one hand on the side of his neck.

It didn’t matter who moved first. It didn’t matter if his hand pulled you in or if you had leaned after you looked at his lips. All that mattered is that Eddie’s grip on you tightened and his mouth was on yours and you were pressing up against him and his hands were moving around you and-

You slipped, your knee sliding against the soaked porcelain and your body was pressed fully against his. Eddie’s hard cock was pressed against your stomach, and he jumped at the sudden accidental movement.

“Are you okay?” he asked, sitting up a bit to check on you.

No, you weren’t okay. And you didn’t think you’d be okay until he kissed you again. So instead of answering you kissed him again, deeper than before. He didn’t hesitate in responding to the kiss, his hands were sliding around you again, rubbing your back as your fingers tangled in his hair.

The two of you stayed like that for a long time, meeting each other’s lips over and over again as the hot water fell on you. You’d occasionally shift and feel his cock rub against your stomach and he’d moan into your mouth in response. You liked that, and found every reason to squirm and rub against him as the two of you kissed.

Eddie’s tongue pressed into your mouth, as easily as if the two of you had kissed a thousand times before. You moaned as he did, the taste of your toothpaste still lingering in his mouth melded with the taste of him. The moan only encouraged him to keep going, exploring your mouth and licking against a spot behind your front teeth that made you shudder.

The water was getting cooler and it took everything inside of you to finally pull away. Eddie looked up at you with a hint of confusion on his face as to why you pulled back.

“Did I-” he started and you shook your head.

“Water’s getting cold. We should get out.” you said.

He nodded and the two of you untangled from each other and helped each other stand up. You finished rinsing the last of the conditioner from Eddie’s hair before turning off the water and stepping out, grabbing you each a towel. He took it from your hand and wrapped it around your shoulders, using it as an excuse to touch you and pull you into another kiss.

Your arms wrapped around his neck and he pushed you up against the wall, needing the closeness as much as you did. Each press of his lips was slightly different each time, as if he was trying to decide the best way to kiss you, or maybe to just have the chance to kiss you every way he could. Making up for lost time? Making up for the uncertain future? It was hard to tell.

“I’m here.” You don’t know why you said it, but those two words slipped out of your mouth in the two seconds that Eddie had pulled away to breathe.

He was panting, and staring intently at you, his look of surprise mirrored your own thoughts. Then his mouth was on you again, kissing you rougher, holding you tighter, his hands were grabbing at you in a near bruising grip. Eddie’s cock was rubbing against your hip now, and he groaned feeling your soft skin against him. You could feel your own wetness start to pool between your legs as you kissed back, trying to keep up with him.

“I’m here, too.” His voice echoed back.

Your hips rocked up against him, and up bit his lower lip, sucking on it hard. He groaned again, and grabbed at your breast, squeezing it before rubbing his thumb against your nipple. You squirmed at the touch, and all you wanted was to be closer, closer, closer.

When Eddie pulled back, it was your turn to look confused. You were dazed from the kiss, breathless with your heart pounding in your chest.

“Eds...?”

“Bedroom.” He pulled himself away from you like ripping a bandaid off. You followed his lips, kissing him again and he shuddered, stumbling back towards the door and reaching blindly for the doorknob.

With some fumbling, you both managed to stumble into your room, lips locked together. It was cooler outside of the bathroom, and you could feel goosebumps raised along his arms as you both fell back into your bed.

You wasted no time straddling him, pushing him down by his shoulders and giving him quick rough kisses.

“Don’t you-” you kissed him “ever” you bit his lower lip “run like that” another bruising kiss “again.”.

“I won’t” he replied, running his hand to the back of your neck and squeezing it. “I won’t. I won’t run.”

Before you could capture his lips again, he pulled you down by your neck and latched his mouth against your throat. Eddie wasted no time with soft kisses, immediately sucking hard on the skin and pulling the blood to the surface until a deep bruise bloomed on your neck. You cursed, and ground your hips down on his cock, feeling the length drag against your clit.

Eddie hissed and kissed the spot lightly where he’d been sucking. His hands gripped your hips, moving his own in rhythm with yours in a desperate attempt to get friction on his leaking cock. One hand slid down to grab your thigh, squeezing the back of it in a way that made your hips shudder and sparks of pleasure shoot right to your core.

“Fuck, Eddie.” you whispered.

Hearing his name had him grabbing you and rolling you below him, kissing your neck more. His lips trailed up to right below your ear, breathing in deeply before moving his mouth down to your chest.

Eddie latched onto one of your nipples and sucked hard, making you gasp and arch your back up. His hand slid down, lower and lower until it was between your legs, sliding a finger through your slit with a trembling hand. The touch to your sensitive folds made you let out a small giggle at the feeling and your hips jerked again before settling back down.

“Fuck, you’re soaked.” Eddie said, talking to himself more than he was talking to you. He played with your entrance for a moment as he kissed and sucked along your breasts, sliding two fingers through your folds and stroking your clit with careful circles.

You wanted to beg for more, roll your hips and tell him to keep going, but you couldn’t. If this was any other scenario, you would have. But when his head tilted back to look at you, all words died down in your mouth. This wasn’t something that you two could rush, not now, not after everything. This was more than just sex, more than a desperate quickie after the heat of battle. This was something you didn’t have a name for yet, but you two would figure out in time.

Eddie leaned over you more, resting one arm by your head. His wet hair ticked your shoulders, and looking up at him, you thought about how a few hours earlier, you were on top of him like this as well, shielding him from monsters. He leaned down and kissed you again as he slid a finger into your entrance.

Your hands gripped his shoulders, gasping into his mouth. He pumped his fingers in and out slowly, never letting your lips disconnect. Eddie was fingering you, Eddie who’d all but bullied you into joining Hellfire when you were the new kid. The same Eddie who you’d bickered and squabbled with regularly because you two loved to get on each other's nerves. The same Eddie who you’d seen cry when no one else was looking over the death of Chrissy Cunningham-

Another finger slid in carefully and this time he did pull back, looking into your eyes for any sign of discomfort. Instead he found your face warmed and your lips parted in pleasure. You let out a small moan as he moved his fingers again, your nails digging into his shoulder.

A quiet cry escaped your lips as he curled his fingers inside you, moving them back and forth until you gave him the signal that he had found the right spot. His name escaped your lips in a way he never dreamed that he’d hear. Eddie’s forehead pressed against yours again, taking in every reaction as his fingers explored your inner walls.

His thumb brushed over your clit, stroking it in shaky and clumsy circles. As unpracticed as it was, it felt good. It felt good because it was him, and because you needed him, and when the fuck was the last time you had even had a chance to get off with everything going on?

“Eddie,” you panted as you moved your hands to his jaw. You kissed him again, and he kissed you back. His fingers sped up, pressing more into that sweet spot that was turning your brain off, removing any thoughts of the Upside Down, or of the shared trauma you now held. Right now, there was only you and Eddie and a mind-numbing pleasure that was building up inside you.

“It’s okay.” he whispered, his hand shaking a little. “Tell me what you need, please.” Eddie looked at you like getting you off was the most important thing he could do right now. You’d only seen this look in his eyes once as he’d cut the sheet rope that connected the two worlds-

“Tell me you’re here.” you begged, the words spilling out without thought. “Fuck, Eddie- just tell me you’re here. That you aren’t going- oh... oh God, please-”

“I’m here.” His voice sounded desperate, looking down at you. “I’m here, I swear. I’m not going anywhere again I- I’m so fucking sorry. I’m here, I’m here, Sweetheart.”

It was that simple nickname that had you tumbling over the edge. That pet name that had always been reserved only for his guitar. His lips crashed onto yours as you reached your peak, swallowing your moans as your pussy clamped down around his fingers. Your body tensed up hard, and you tangled your fingers into his hair pulling at the roots. Eddie moaned at the feeling, his fingers faltering for a moment before slowing down and then finally pulling out.

Immediately you felt empty, the orgasm not enough to satiate the need to have him as close as possible. You could still feel your pussy contracting as you came down from your orgasm, and you realized he was still talking.

“‘M here.” Eddie whispered against your temple as he placed gentle pecks to your skin. “I’m here. I won’t leave again.”

“I need you, Eds.” you said, looking up at him. “Fuck, I’ve needed you for so long.”

You hoped that he understood what you were saying. This was more than needing him inside you, this was about everything you two had been through together over the past few years. Every Hellfire Club meeting, every Tuesday at the Hideout, every shared joint between the two of you, every shitty study session that never went anywhere because you two would get too distracted and end up talking to each other about everything and nothing.

You needed it, all of it, all of him. Eddie had made an indent on your life that you never wanted straightened out. You could not, and would not, conceive of a world without Eddie Munson in it. His death would have destroyed you in every possible way.

Friendship, romance, sex, you didn’t care. If he was willing to just exist in your life, that’s all you fucking wanted.

You didn’t even notice that you were crying again, until Eddie was wiping away your tears with his clean hand. He had a panicked look on his face as if worried that he’d done something wrong.

“Shit, I’m sorry. Did we take this too far?” he asked, grabbing a tissue from your bedside table and wiping his own hand off before offering one to you. You took it and shook your head, wiping your eyes and trying to take in a deep breath.

“No, not that’s not it.” you said. “I just... I was so scared that I was going to lose you, Eddie. I’m still scared that when everything is done you’re going to disappear on me again.”

Eddie looked down at you, and you could almost see the wheels turning in his head. “I thought I was doing the right thing, buying them more time.” he said quietly. “I thought if I could keep them distracted for just a few more minutes, everything would work out. If I had climbed back up, I thought- I was convinced the bats would either break in and attack you and Dustin or they’d go after the others.”

“You’re stupid.” you sniffed.

“I know.” he agreed.

“A total buttface jerk.” you added.

“Yeah, you’re right.” Eddie spread your legs more, putting himself into position. His cock was sliding through your folds now.

“Y-you’re a freak and my fucking hero.” you gasped out as he pushed himself inside you carefully. Eddies cock stretched you pleasantly and easily.

“I’m getting mixed signals here, Sweetheart.” he mumbled, kissing along your jaw. Your arms wrapped around his neck tightly, and you pushed your own face against his neck, sucking your own mark against the front of his throat. You didn't care if anyone else saw, you wanted to see proof of this night on him.

You wanted proof on him every night for the rest of your life.

“I'm never running away again.” he groaned in your ear as his hips started moving. Eddie held you tighter, nearly suffocating you as he did. How many times had he hugged you like this before, with you laughing and pushing him away, only for him to squeeze you harder telling you that your Strength stat sucked?

“I'll find you.” You whispered in his ear as he grabbed your thigh, lifting it to wrap around his hips. “I'll find you every time, I fucking promise.”

He moaned loudly, his hips pushing harder into yours. Eddie was as deep inside you as he could possibly be, and each drag of his cock inside you made every nerve light up in your body.

“Why did you come after me?” Eddie's voice was a near growl. His voice was strained, as if asking that question would snap the connection between the two of you. His lips never left your skin, kissing every inch that he could reach on your neck and face.

“I couldn't let you- ohh oh God... I couldn't let you go. Couldn't let you disappear again” your body shuddered under him as his angle shifted slightly, just enough that it was rubbing up against that spot again that made it hard to think.

“You could have died too.” Eddie's voice rattled around your head, frustration dripping from his lips as he sank his teeth into your shoulder. You cried out, dragging your nails down his spine in return, leaving raised marks down his back.

He hissed and smashed his lips to your again, biting at your lower lip and sucking hard. Eddie looked at you, frustration now in his eyes as he looked down at you.

It seemed like you weren't the only one processing your emotions through sex.

“You could have died too.” He repeated. One hand went to the back of your neck, his thumb pressing right below your ear. You met his eyes, suddenly feeling small under him.

Eddie had only ever looked at you like this once before. You two had a blow up fight the night that Chrissy had been murdered. You'd been so fucking mad at him for not moving Hellfire, having missed that whole conversation as you had a different lunch period.

You hadn't learned about it until Erica Sinclair had walked in with Mike and Dustin. You'd swallowed the fight until after the campaign, when everyone was celebrating and Eddie was sneaking towards the back of the gym.

It hadn't been pretty. You two had yelled at each other, called each other every name in the book. You were furious that he'd abandoned a party member and wouldn't budge.

Eddie had hated that you were the only one to really stand up to him, to call him out for refusing to budge this one time. His brown eyes had turned black as you said things that didn't even fucking matter anymore.

You saw him leave pissed with Chrissy Cunningham. You wondered if anyone else saw you two fighting that night which would have made him look worse when the cheerleader showed up dead in his trailer.

Another moan passed your lips and your eyes closed as he started thrusting faster inside you. His hand on your neck tightening and loosening rhythmically, the blood running to your head and cutting off over and over again.

“I can't lose you either.” He panted, kissing you again in a way that you were sure was going to screw you up forever. “You think I wanted to watch you die, too?” He demanded.

“Eddie, I-” you didn't know what to say, all you could do was lay there as he mercilessly pushed into you, watching as the anger turned to anguish as he leaned over you.

“Look at me,” he said, his voice low and firm. The same subtle husky voice he used when he ran his game, the same voice he'd conditioned you to listen to over the past year.

You nearly came again right there.

Eddie’s warm brown eyes bore into yours and you didn't look away, even as his pace hit that perfect stride that had your toes curl and made your eyes want to roll back.

“If I can't run away, you can throw yourself into danger.” He said. “I'm not losing you either.”

“Not gonna lose me-” you panted. “Fuck Eddie, I just-” your back arched as his lips sucked another bruise into your shoulder. “Don't put yourself in danger again and I won't have to.”

“We’re never doing that again.” he grunted into your shoulder. “No more monsters, no more fucking spellcasters, no bullshit alternate dimensions.” His hands were everywhere, as if he couldn’t decide where he wanted or needed to grab you. “Gonna get us as far away from this shithole town as possible.”

Us.

That word echoed through your brain. Us. That meant there was something more here, a future. A future with Eddie that he wanted you to be a part of.

You kissed him again, and any more words between you died down as it didn’t mean anything anymore. The Upside Down, the future, none of it. Eddie’s hand finally made its way down to your clit again and stroked it fast. You tangled your fingers into his hair and pulled at the roots, his hips were starting to falter with their thrusts. Each push making your brain grow hazy as the pleasure continued to build inside you.

Eddie pulled away from the kiss, pressing his lips against your ear again instead. “I’m here.” he promised. “Fuck, right- I’m right here.”

“I’m here, too” you repeated, your own voice breathy and desperate. “Eddie, I-”

“I love you.”

Those three words from his lips, had you seeing white. The whole world stopped and your body tensed up. Your nails sank into his back, and if you had been in a more clear state of mind you would have noticed you’d accidentally drawn blood. You cried out, unsure if you had managed to say those words back at all until the orgasm had started to subside. You felt dizzy, lightheaded and you breathed out the air that you had been hoarding in your lungs.

Eddie was staring at you with wide doe eyes, lips parted slightly in surprise. His hips were rocking slower now, as if unsure if he should continue after having apparently shattered your mind.

“I... love you, too.” you managed to gasp out, meeting his gaze. That was enough for Eddie as he picked his pace back up, rougher than before. He pressed his lips against your neck, breathing you in completely, listening to your overstimulated cries of pleasure as he pushed faster into you.

It didn’t take long before he was cumming too, his hips jerking and shaking as he finally slowed down his thrusts. His weight was fully on top of you now as he started to soften inside you.

You don’t know how long the two of you stayed like that, with him laying on you and with you stroking his back and matching his breaths. Maybe the two of you dozed off a few times, trying to savor the moment of peace between the two of you.

Eddie was the one to break the silence with a chuckle.

“What’s so funny, Eddie?” you asked, your eyes still closed.

“We’re gonna need another shower after that.” he replied, slowly getting up off you. It was cold without his warmth and you whined at the loss.

“Sounds like a tomorrow problem.” you mumbled, looking up at him. His curly hair was frizzing badly in its half-dried state. But he still got up and went to the bathroom, you heard the sound of running water and the a toilet flushing before he came back with a towel to clean help clean you up.

“Did you mean what you said?” you asked quietly, as he settled back into bed with you, the two of you getting over the sheets.

Eddie nodded, looking at your blankets before meeting your gaze. “Yeah, I did.”

“Good.” you said and gave him a reassuring smile. “Because I don’t want to fight anymore monsters either again.”

“Wait that’s-” Eddie stopped and laughed, shaking his head. “You know what I meant.”

“I know.”

“Did you mean it?” He asked.

“Yeah. I meant it.” you reassured him.

“Say it again?” he asked, cupping your jaw again. “I want to know it wasn’t just my amazing dick making you say it.”

You laughed. It felt so fucking good to laugh with him again. Had there been any doubt about your feelings for him, that would have sealed it.

“Eddie Munson, I love you.” you said, looking into his eyes. “And if you ever do something stupid like that again, I’m going to be the one to kill you personally.”

“I love you, too.” he said, and for the first time in a week, his eyes were clear. There was no haunted look in his eyes, no anger, no frustration. For this brief night before reality came back the two of you could just exist with each other. Neither of you knew what was going to happen after this evening, but you knew in your gut that the two of you were going to get through this together.

----

Please comment and reblog <3

Alternative title: Use Your Tears As Lube

If you cried you have to legally tell me. I'm keeping count.

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson smut #nacht fic

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cnl0400 · 12 days ago

Text

The new dating feature... What to expect?

(Apart from disapointment, of course)

Disclaimer: I only bought this because I had a lot of Google Play points, so I could shave a looooooooooot of the total price, but my condolences to anyone who doesn't live in the US because it's a lot more expensive in another regions... Including mine, of course

Disclaimer 2: I'm not telling you what to do with your money, this Is my personal opinion. If you are planning in buying this, do whatever idc, but since a lot of people are having doubts, I felt that I might as well tell everyone what Is this about.

So yeah... Since they announced the new feature, I knew It either would cost real money, It just sounded too good to be true, but I didn't expect to cost $29.99? Almost $37 in my country currency, a total scam, really.

But to be fair to them, this Is a bundle that comes with 300 DP, and considering the price of 280 DP, it's almost like you get the ticket for "free", right?? At least that's how Solmare probably thought It would look like, but the reality Is that the common player will see this bundle and just think that this ticket cost 30 fucking dollars (just look at the comments of Twitter and the tag Right now). In my opinion, just separate the DP and the ticket, and have the bundle as an special offert If you want. Remember that selling stuff Is also about framing... Most players that were planning on buying this might not be planning on buying the DP (like myself, I don't buy DP unless it's on special offerts) so the only thing people like that will think Is that "why this ticket costs that much?"

But what you get in the actual event, you might ask? The trailer was vague as hell in my opinion, and that's an instant red flag in my radar, especially for that spicy art that came with it

For a ticket date you get:

A 1min call

A 10min storyline (not fully voiced, apart from certain lines in the las part of the storyline)

A Majolish background with the date art

The event starts with you calling you boy of preference (in this case, I choose Mammon) to invite him to a date, the call ends and you get a 10min storyline. The premise of the Mammon's date Is that MC has won tickets to Phantom Park, and then Mammon & MC get involved to a game of tag to win a price. Then couple shennigans happen, blah blah blah.

The Story Is... Not bad? I found It rather cute actually, it's romantic and at least they make It explicit that Mammon & MC aré actually dating, but again, this could very well have been in a Devilgram, it's not worth the 30 dollars Solmare expects you to pay tbh. Just tip your favorite fanfic author and call It a day

The last segment Is the one they show in the tráiler, with Mammon getting out of the shower

In this scene, some lines are voiced, and tbh, If the actual story was like this, It almost miiiight be worth It (not the full price, but at least something). But as now? Save your money people, I wouldn't really recommend It.

The only way I would recommend buying It it's If you're already planning on buying the 280 DP offert, or you have a lot of coupons/GPP so you don't pay full price lol, but If you like Lucifer (or Asmo) just do yourself a favor and buy the ASMR. At least, that's what I think

#obey me #obey me nightbringer #post0400 #hasta aqui mi reporte joaquin #like I said. I was planning in doing a mini-review of the feature when it launched but I didn't expect to actually be this expensive...#it's really dissapointing. I said this as someone who doesn't mind paying for mobile games. but honestly just a total skip #hope at least they reconsider the price because the feature as this price it's simply not worth that kind of money #just buy a full dating sim for switch/steam at that point #I never buy the 240 DP ofert so it's not appealing to me. and I know this is a busisness but you have to think of the optics #of how the common user is going to look at this. and looking at the tag right know and the comments on Twitter. it's not looking good #but if Solmare thinks they can survive of whales alone. then whatever I guess

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theyluvlyss · 4 months ago

Text

𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐃𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐩𝐨𝐨𝐥 & 𝐖𝐨𝐥𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐥𝐞𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐬𝐚𝐲...

my head is all but consumed with thoughts only of wade wilson, logan howlett, and remy lebeau. they're all I can process in my head (besides shazam, but that's a given considering no one loves shazam the way I do, so🤷🏽‍♀️) and I y e a r n desperately for an influx in "wade x y/n x logan" fics and the "remy x y/n" fics... dare I even ask, humbly ofc, hear me out... for a splash of "wade x y/n x remy". genuinely, I'd kill for some of that ngl.

and I bet you're wondering, "lyssa, why not do it yourself🤔?"

short answer: I am swamped with requests, and even if I wasn't, I'm not ready yet lmao I fear I do not possess the skills to capture them in my writing perfectly😔 ... yet😈.

in the meantime, tho *😈evil little laughter😈* may I plz suggest the following prompts and pairings to and for anybody willing to work with them or wanting ideas (begging any writers that see this to please write these and tag me plz plz plz plz plz 😭🙏🏽😃plzplzplzplzplzplzplzpl-)...

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⚠️trigger and content warning btw lol -

mentions of fighting/violence/bloodshed, death, gore, (like c'mon,,, bffr, look at who you're reading about😐🤨), anxiety/panic attacks, harsh words/themes/elements/physical injuries, abuse and/or negelct, separation anxiety, mental disorders, brief mention of sickness/illness, drugs (just 🍃 and painkillers), age gap (nothing illegal, chill out🤨✋🏽), use of a derogatory term (not used in a negative sense tho lol), and some semi-common smut themes that I won't list here, but be wary if that stuff makes you uncomfortable :)♡. also, these are all under the pretense that the reader is a cis girl, she/her/hers pronouns (so ig you could think of this as one, big, mass request to all writers willing from me lol🤭🥴🫶🏽).

𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭/𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐭/𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭 :

- reader having a panic/anxiety attack and ofc being comforted (causes my vary; maybe right after a fight/battle, or because of over-worrying or too much pressure, maybe after a fight with another loved one, etcetc). definitely wanna see this with all three of them, but separately, tho. like, one fic or list of "preferences/headcannons" for logan, one for wade, and then one for remy.

- near death or death (followed by resurrection swift after). it could be reader almost dies or dies (then gets resurrected, get creative with it/how, fr, yk?) or the reverse; the POI (person of interest) dies, although given two of the three's abilities, y'all might have to get creative if you want it to translate for logan and/or wade so this one would be mainly for a remy x reader.

- I personally love a good "POI says sumn mean/outta pocket, hurts reader's feels, stuff happens idk, but they eventually kiss and make up" trope. I'd eat that up, especially cuz OHHH,,,, wade taking a joke or playful argument or something too far? logan being a little too mean/angsty to you for comfort?? remy saying something that gets lost in translation, so it comes out harsher than intended??? 😫😫😫‼️‼️ AND IF YOU WANNA GET MESSY WIT IT, RUNNING TO ONE OF THE OTHER THREE FOR COMFORT🙈🙈⁉️⁉️⁉️.

- a classic; reader getting injured (mildly or worse, doesn't matter), needing to be taken care of, but is stubborn about it?? always a good one.

- getting a little crazy and silly here, but I like a good "abusive and/or negelctful ex/current partner" trope. like hell yeah, one of you big, strong men get over here and save me, whisk me away and show me what I really deserve😻‼️. NOT romanticizing/glorifying it obvs, like no, I mean that wade, logan, and/or remy would not be the red flags in this scenario, they're the one(s) doing the saving FROM the red flag ex/current partner lol.

- getting a little crazier and sillier with this one, but one where reader gets snatched up🙂? oouuuu, miss girl got kidnapped?! once again, somebody come save me, and if "somebody" is not wade, logan, and/or remy, then don't bother, I don't want it. matter of fact, just gon' on ahead and leave me, I'll figure it out myself🙂✌🏽. I think I'd want these separate, actually, bc I wanna take in the individuality of their reactions, like,,, logan going feral?? pretty predictable tbh lmao but still hot. remy?? idek ngl, y'all gon' have to figure him out. BUT WADE BEING SERIOUS AND NOT AS TALKATIVE FOR ONCE UNTIL HE KNOWS YOU'RE SAFE???? OOOHOOHOOOOOOO, GIMMIE🖐🏽👹🖐🏽✊🏽👹✊🏽!!!

- ig this could be put in the panic/anxiety attack category, but I also feel like this might be it's own separate thing, so idk, but... separation anxiety on reader's part. whatever the circumstances may be to breed it, reader is just (not in a unhealthy way) attached to the POI(s), so them leaving for whatever reason is pretty hard on her (and the POI(s), too, because hello, they don't wanna make their reader upset, but things gotta get done fr yk😫🥲),,, lots of reassurance, comforting, and maybe distractions ensue??

- reader with an alter ego/inner beast, whether that be a result of her powers or a mental disorder (think like,,, split personality or maybe DID or something like that, but I do wanna say, if you're gonna go the mental route, make sure you do your research so that you're representing it - not only accurately - but you're not dehumanizing or dumbing it down as well) or just anything that would cause the reader to, as I said, have a different side of themself,,, werewolf type deal, yk? "normal" for the most part, but then has her moments where she be on demon time and then when she's back to herself, she's just like "???" while everyone else is like "!!!". I suppose this could then be followed up/solved with a "the sun's getting real low" typa thing/moment from the POI(s), but that's neither here nor there, do what feels right fr♡.

- reader (just barely) escapes cassandra nova??? that could be cool (a.k.a. very, very angsty bc surely the encounter has messed the reader alllll the way up both mentally and physically, especially knowing what typa timing cass be on lmao😃). love a good hurt/comfort, I can't get enough, actually. this one (given the movie context) may or may not work with wolvie and/or pool (again, up to the writer to get creative), but gambit?? he's been in the void his whole life, he knows cass, sooo it'd make more sense for him to have a higher understanding of the situation in full, but do what y'all want, I'm just the idea woman🤷🏽‍♀️.

𝐟𝐥𝐮𝐟𝐟 :

- morning cuddles and softeness and ughghfhfhdjd♡!!♡!♡!!♡!♡!!♡!! and then the opposite, night/bedtime cuddles and softness and uugjfjdkwkfke♡!!♡!♡!!♡!♡!!♡!!

- height difference teasings and shenanigans. we can always stick to the classics, ofc, short reader, tall wade, logan, and/or remy. maybe its an advantage in fights - fast, lethal, and small + big, shielding, and strong - but sucks in more domestic/calm cases like reaching for shit on the top shelf or wanting to kiss somebody. but I'd also love some tall gworl reader type shit, miss strong, lean, runway model energy, stepping on any heads and wooing any men that are in her path🥴😻. bending down with a smile so she can hear him, mindlessly playing with his hair, occasionally makes a quip here and there on the difference without thinking lol and he haaaaateeees all of it (but he looooveeeessss all of it🤭).

- reader being THAT GIRL, literally being in a 1v26 or sumn crazy like that and she's just kicking ass and shit the whole time, and then there's the POI(s),,, gawking and in love like "damn that's MY GIRL fr\😻/!!".

- *imagine a vine boom after every bolded word, okay, go* teen/minor/young PLATONIC NONSEXUAL NONROMANTIC (literally I can not stress this enough) NOT DATING AT ALL EVER reader and one/two/all of them. I think it'd just be silly seeing them (wade, logan, and or remy) working/paired with/having a bond with this little gremlin yet sweetheart of a reader who's somehow able to tolerate/put up with/ignore/maybe even indulge in their craziness lmfao. maybe just as or is even more crazy than they are, chaotic and desensitized type shit. you could even get ansgty with it, have this teen reader need saving or something like that, yk?

- sparring match and reader BEATS POI(s) in said spar cuz she's cool, awesome, and mega baller like that. lots of tension and goofiness, especially from the reader, cuz she knows damn well she's the shit. or, a different route!!... total dumb luck that she beat him/both/all of them, and is very obviously playing it off/acting like she won on purpose lmfao, cockiness ensuing.

- can't go wrong with a sick-fic lol. who doesn't wanna be taken care of?

- reader needs/wears glasses🤷🏽‍♀️. it can be the discovery of actually needing them, reader always squinting tryna read/see shit, or nearly getting herself in and out of danger bc again, she blind lmao. or it's just the case of reader never wears them out and about, but in calmer moments (where she doesn't run the risk of breaking them) she'll put them on, so she decides to bust 'em out one day and it's just the POI(s) being like ":O...😻😻!!".

- *olivia rodrigo voice* JEALOUSY, JEALOUSY, YEAA-aAAH😫😫‼️ ... reader who just,,, she don't play that shit, man, lmfao it's called you can prove yourself either friend or foe,,, stay tf away from my man or get your ass beat. pick one. and it's the POI(s) just absolutely flattered and amused with this energy from reader lmfao, reassurance ensuing quick after ofc. or, if you wanna get silly with it (and by silly, I mean violent♡), reader with a girl who can't take a hint😀 *eye twitch* so she finally makes shit clear one way or another (one way; does sumn with the POI(s) that makes the girl uncomfortable so she fucks off. another; reader pretty much beats that girl up and it's the POI(s) laughing but also trying to pry reader off of her cuz "stop it, I'm yours, I promise, you don't have to kill her, she didn't know any better😭!"). or just completely switch it up, vice versa, role-reversal POI(s) get jelly and it's reader having to deal with whatever may happen after/due to the fact lol.

𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭 :

- shameless flirt reader!!!! she's not obnoxious or out of character/proper timing with it, but definitely a reader with helllllaaaaa rizz. is mainly on some "is somebody gonna match my freak?" type shi. wade would find it very silly and he'd match the freak ofc. logan,,, maybe he'd start off annoyed by it, then get used to it, only realizing you've actually grown on him once you start to pull back a little/stop completely? REMY WOULD LOVE AND BE AMUSED BY IT, so all I'm gonna say here is this: rabbits🐇🥰. iykyk♡.

- a smoke sesh leading to some good, old fashioned high/sleepy sex🥰. that's it, that's the prompt♡.

- lord, free me from my sins🙏🏽, plz don't judge me y'all😔 ,,, age gap😃? NOTHING CRAZY, CHILL, but yk, like,,, just a little young thing in her 20s or sumn being scooped up by one (or two🤭) of these older, more mature, aged like fine wine, and experienced men,,, that's all🥰.

- that moment when reader is a whore and is actually literally prancing around without a care in the world, fucking three different guys (wade, logan, and remy obvs) because "they're hot lol" - not necessarily behind their backs - but no one's saying anything or telling her no, nor does anyone seem to have any issues with it/are opposed, sooo😗🤷🏽‍♀️.

- do y'all think,,, because wolverine is yk...wolf-like-ish-whatever.... do y'all think that he,,,, that maybe he goes thru... a rut🙂?? lmfaoGDHAKXKPQPRR okay that's enough, that's enough🥴✋🏽-.

- you know how some smut has certain labels/themes/tags that are gonna be, yk,,, in said smut?? well, cuz I'm out of any specific ideas for smut, I'm just gonna leave some here, m'kaaaay, and whatever y'all wanna dooooo is up to youuuu, just as long as I get to seeee😗☺��🫶🏽~...

⚠️ also don't say I didn't warn y'all, I mean, there's literally a whole ass trigger warning at the top, so do not start fckn trippin' because you disagree with me or saw sumn you don't fw, cuz tbh, I don't care and you can honestly block me if it's that serious♡.

dom-sub, daddy/praise/breeding/spanking kink, knife/gun/blood play (and/or just mutant/power ability play in general hehehe), food/wax play, cnc (I don't suggest full blown non-con seeing as none of them seem the type to do such, no matter the circumstances, plus it's just not my thing personally but hey, I'm not currently writing for pool, wolvie, or gambit rn, so that's up to whoever is🤷🏽‍♀️), hunter-prey (y'all might see this and immediately think wolvie, which is understandable fr, but I beg y'all to get creative and let remy and/or wade hunt reader down, it can be done and done right, I promise, plz, I need it, 😫PLEASE!!-), friends with benefits,,, OHHH ENEMIES with benefits🫢🫢!!, overstim, jealousy/possessive/yandere, unprotected/creampie/oral ... that's all that comes to mind lmao wow what a crazy note to end this on, anyways-

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yeah, so, do with all of this what you will (and plz spread this around, I genuinely do wanna see these get written and myself tagged like I am PINING for these fic ideas to be turned into reality😭🙏🏽), I just had to get my thoughts out before I forgot (at least in the fanfic department), because if someone were to ask me my thoughts on the movie itself !!!!! OMG I could run my mouth forever, but I don't wanna do that (lazy) so lmao for now, that's all lol byeeee~ /ᐠ-˕-マ!!

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