#alm process

[mayra-quijotescx]

paycheck hit and rent immediately took all but $70 of it

but I stay silly :3

[valentialbein]

now this is the really self indulgent one

my headcanon is that modern au alm is the kind of guy who wears a hoodie and shorts in sub zero weather. i’m not sure if it’s accurate but he’s got the cold tolerance for it. like this

[how-serene]

In Your Eyes

Pairing - Dwayne (Lost Boys) x Neutral!Reader

Summary - A night on the boardwalk with Dwayne.

Word Count - 775

Warnings - fluff, mentions of smoking, no use of y/n, pet names

A/N - Billy Wirth, you absolute beauty.

Santa Carla’s cool breeze washed over your face. Behind you, the shrieks and laughter of friends broke through the crashing of the waves. They danced wildly around a bonfire, Mötley Crüe booming through a radio speaker. Despite the night bringing a cold chill, hoards of people still strolled along the boardwalk. Even from your place on the pier, you could feel the public’s infectious excitement. 

You leaned against the rickety railing, a cigarette held loosely between your fingers. Summer’s full moon hung high, reflecting off of the rippling waves of the water. Stars blinked down at you, against the sky’s black canvas. The pungent smell of the ocean invaded your airways, mixing with the bitter smoke. 

A pair of leather cladded arms snaked around your waist, startling you. 

“Hey, baby,” Dwayne purred, breath fanning against your ear. His hands traveled down to rest on your hips, squeezing at the flesh. 

“You’re late,” you pointed out, fighting back a grin. 

He merely hummed at your words, instead choosing to leave faint kisses on your shoulder. Even through the thick fabric of your shirt, his lips still managed to leave your skin buzzing.

Dwayne trailed his lips up, til he met the shell of your ear again. His rough hands turned you to properly face him, the railing pressed into your back. 

“Got caught up with something,” he explained, dark eyes shining down at you. 

From the faint ruby stain in the corner of his lip, you understood very quickly what that something was. You brought your thumb up, to swipe at the red smudge. The corner of his lip quirked up, carefully watching your movement. 

“You’re cold,” he noticed, leaning into your touch. 

“”The pier isn’t exactly the warmest place on earth.” 

“How long have you been waiting?” 

“Thirty minutes, give or take.” You shrugged, letting your hand fall back down to your side. 

Dwayne sighed, dark brown eyes drifting past you to stare out at the ocean waves. The wind had picked up, now faintly brushing against his thick black hair. He seemed lost, caught in a whirlwind of thoughts you couldn’t begin to decipher. 

You tucked a loose strand of hair behind his ear, effectively getting his attention. His eyes softened, sweeping over you. 

“Wanna know what’s been on my mind all night?” You asked, brushing the tip of your nose against his. Dwayne’s sweet mouth was only centimeters away from yours. His hands slipped up the back of your shirt, the cool silver rings he wore ghosting over the skin.

“What is it, doll?” he muttered, lips grazing the corner of your mouth. Patiently waiting for you to speak. His unshaven stubble scraped against your chin.

You planted a firm kiss on his cheek, before pulling back. 

“Winning that giant stuffed panda I saw near the balloon darts.” 

The pier was alive, as bright neon lights illuminated the boardwalk. The flood of patrons rushed past you, of kids dragging their parents by the cuff of their sleeves, or friends huddled together like packs of wolves. All vying for that last ride on the Ferris wheel, or an overpriced corndog before the park closed for the night. 

You walked, with Dwayne’s arm slung over your shoulders, and a stuffed Panda lovingly held in your hands. 

“Since when were you so good at darts, mister?”

Dwayne sheepishly smiled, glancing down at you, “Just one of my many talents.” 

You snorted, bumping your hip with his. It was odd, at times you realized. Dwayne smelled of cigarettes, and cheap booze most likely snagged from the victims of bonfire parties. His mouth tasted of mint, and nicotine when he would kiss you. There was always something beyond it though, a metallic taste your mind would block out before you could process it. 

Even though you knew. 

He appeared so human at times, it knocked you back. It was almost easy to brush off the strange coolness of his skin, or the carnivorous look in his features when a hoard of people would pass by you two. 

Then there were moments when the human-like quality of Dwayne overshadowed everything else. Moment’s like now, when he pressed you into his side, grinning as he peppered kisses over your hairline. You giggled, leaning back away from him, your heart thudding in your chest. Up ahead, his pack was gathered around a picnic-table, lazily leaning against it. Their ravenous gaze met yours, locked on your approaching form. Marko, with an infectious toothy smile and unkempt golden hair, waved at you. Dwayne grumbled, muttering something under his breath.

You were reminded that monsters lurked on every corner. 

In Santa Carla, at least. 

[yunholic-jongholic]

Love In a Divorce [Part 6] | C.JH x Reader

SUMMARY | In a strained 10-year marriage, you and your husband decide to get a divorce due to growing tensions. While meeting with your divorce attorney, you unexpectedly develop feelings for him. As the divorce process unfolds, you find yourself in an intimate relationship with the attorney, complicating the situation as you navigate your separation from your ex-husband.

PAIRINGS | Jongho x Fem!Reader

RATING | Mature, 18+, NSFW, MINORS DNI!!!

CONTENT WARNINGS | Explicit Content, NSFW, SMUT, PDA (some), Cursing, Fingering, Orgasms, Marking, Unprotected Sex (Don't do it), Creampie, Slight Breeding Kink, Pregnancy-Mentioning, (Might edit, because I might have missed some)...

WORD COUNT | 3k

AUTHOR NOTE | This is the last part, I have another Jongho story on the way, it's a bit darker and angsty than this one is. But I am glad you enjoyed my first series (based on a dang meme my group chat found on twitter) lmao. I hope you enjoy this last chapter. :)

TAG LIST | @blackandgreenandblue @mingisleftnipple @kyunlov

•

A couple of years had passed since you sold your house and moved in with Jongho. The two of you had built a life together—one filled with laughter, love, and late nights spent tangled up in each other’s arms.

But lately, something felt... off. Jongho had been acting more nervous and stressed than usual, his shoulders tense and his smile a little too forced. You watched him pace around the living room, his phone constantly in his hand, his mind clearly somewhere else.

You tried to shake off the uneasy feeling, convincing yourself it was just work getting to him. After all, his job could be demanding, and long cases always took a toll on him. But as the days went on, his anxiety seemed to grow, and you couldn’t help but worry.

That evening, as he sat next to you on the couch, you reached over and gently placed your hand on his arm. “Jongho... are you okay? You’ve been acting... different lately. Is work stressing you out?” you asked softly, your eyes searching his for answers.

He looked at you, his face softening as he took your hand, his fingers intertwining with yours. He opened his mouth to speak, then hesitated, his eyes flickering with uncertainty. “Yeah... it’s just... work’s been a lot,” he mumbled, giving you a small, reassuring smile. But the way his hand trembled slightly in yours told you there was more to the story than he was letting on.

Worried about Jongho, you picked up your phone and dialed Yeosang, hoping his friends could help get him out of the house and take his mind off whatever was bothering him. But before you could even finish the conversation, Jongho appeared in the doorway, his expression soft yet unusually tense.

“Hey... I was thinking,” he began, his voice hesitant, “Would you want to go on a little getaway tonight? Just us... somewhere in the city. We could get a nice hotel and go out for dinner... something special.”

Your eyes widened in surprise; the phone still pressed to your ear as you processed his words. You quickly wrapped up your call with Yeosang, your heart fluttering at the idea of a spontaneous escape with him. It wasn’t like Jongho to plan something like this on a whim, but you couldn’t deny how excited it made you feel.

“That sounds perfect,” you replied, a warm smile spreading across your face. “I’d love to.”

Jongho’s shoulders visibly relaxed, his eyes softening as relief washed over him. He gave you a shy, almost nervous smile before pulling you into a hug, his arms holding you just a little tighter than usual. You felt his heartbeat against yours, rapid and unsteady, and the unease you’d been feeling these past few days crept back in.

But as he pulled back and looked at you with that familiar adoration in his eyes, you decided to push your worries aside. Whatever was bothering him, you were sure he’d tell you when he was ready. For now, you just wanted to enjoy this unexpected adventure together.

The drive to the hotel was quiet—almost too quiet. You glanced over at Jongho, noticing the way his hands gripped the steering wheel just a little too tightly, his jaw clenched as he focused on the road. He was lost in his thoughts, his usual playful demeanor replaced with a quiet tension you couldn’t quite decipher.

You wanted to ask him if he was okay, to reach out and ease whatever was weighing on him, but you held back, not wanting to push him. Instead, you tried to convince yourself that it was just work stress getting to him.

When you finally arrived at the hotel, Jongho helped you with your bags, his smile warm but his eyes distant. He checked you both in quickly, his voice soft as he spoke to the receptionist. Even then, you could sense his nervousness, his shoulders tight as if he were bracing himself for something.

Once you entered the room, you took in the beautiful view of the city lights sprawling out before you. The room was luxurious, more extravagant than you’d expected, with a plush king-sized bed and a window that stretched from floor to ceiling.

Jongho set your bags down and let out a deep breath, his shoulders dropping as if a weight had been lifted. But his eyes remained distant, his gaze fixed on the city lights.

You stood beside him, leaning your head against his shoulder, feeling the steady rise and fall of his chest as he breathed. Jongho’s hand slid into yours, his fingers curling around yours gently, his grip warm and comforting.

He glanced down at you, his eyes softening as a small smile played on his lips. “So... are you ready for dinner?” he asked, his gaze lingering on you a little longer than usual, as if memorizing every detail.

You looked up at him, his eyes filled with something you couldn’t quite read anticipation, maybe even a touch of nervousness. But his smile was genuine, his thumb brushing softly over the back of your hand.

“Yeah, I’m ready,” you replied, your voice warm and light. “Lead the way.”

He squeezed your hand gently, his shoulders relaxing as he pulled you closer. “Good. I’ve got something special planned tonight.”

You couldn’t help but smile at the excitement in his voice, your heart fluttering with curiosity. Whatever was on his mind, you knew tonight was going to be unforgettable.

Dinner was perfect—almost too perfect. The restaurant was beautifully decorated, with soft lighting and gentle music playing in the background. Jongho had chosen a cozy corner table, away from the noise, giving you both a sense of intimacy as you enjoyed your meal.

But as the night went on, you couldn’t help but notice his growing nervousness. His smile was just a little too forced, his laughter a little too quick, and his eyes kept darting away every time you tried to meet his gaze.

“Jongho... are you sure everything’s okay?” you asked, your voice soft with concern as you reached across the table, your fingers brushing against his. “Do you need anything?”

He blinked, his eyes widening for a moment before he quickly shook his head. “No... no, I’m fine,” he replied, his voice a little too quick, a little too high. He forced a smile, squeezing your hand. “I just... want tonight to be perfect for you.”

Your heart softened, and you returned his smile, letting his hand linger in yours. “It already is,” you reassured him, hoping to ease his nerves. But even as he relaxed slightly, you could see the tension still lingering in his shoulders, his fingers tapping restlessly against the table.

You didn’t push him any further, deciding to let him share whatever was bothering him when he was ready. But as the night went on, you couldn’t help but feel a growing sense of anticipation, wondering just what was on his mind.

You both were out walking, the cool evening breeze wrapping around you as you gazed at the dazzling city lights. The view was breathtaking, but nothing compared to the warmth you felt just being beside Jongho. His presence made everything more beautiful.

Lost in thought, you turned to say something to him—only to find him gone. Your heart skipped a beat, panic surging through you as you looked around frantically. But then you spotted him, just a few steps behind you, down on one knee.

Your eyes widened in shock, your breath catching in your throat as you realized what was happening. Jongho looked up at you, his eyes glistening with emotion, his face a mixture of love and nervousness.

“Y/N...” he began softly, his voice wavering just a little. “I want you to know how much I love you. Every day, every moment... I fall for you even more. I want to be by your side forever. To take care of you, to love you, to make you smile... always.”

He opened a small velvet box, revealing a sparkling ring that caught the city lights perfectly, reflecting a thousand tiny stars. “Will you marry me?”

Your heart raced, tears welling up as his words sank in. You couldn’t speak, your voice caught somewhere between a laugh and a sob, so you did the only thing you could—you nodded, your head bobbing up and down frantically. “Yes... Yes! Of course, yes!”

Relief flooded his face, his shoulders relaxing as he let out a breath he’d clearly been holding. He slipped the ring onto your finger, his hands shaking just slightly as he stood up.

Before he could even fully straighten, you threw your arms around him, pulling him into a fierce, tearful kiss. His arms wrapped around you instantly, holding you close as he kissed you back, pouring every ounce of love and relief into that one perfect moment.

The city lights sparkled behind you, but nothing shined brighter than the joy in his eyes—or the ring on your finger.

“Is this what’s really been stressing you out? Trying to find a way to propose to me?” you teased between kisses, your voice light and playful as you pulled back just enough to see his face.

Jongho’s cheeks flushed a deep shade of red, his eyes darting away as he let out a nervous chuckle. “Yeah... maybe,” he admitted softly, his voice barely above a whisper. “I was just... I was worried you’d say no. I know you went through so much before, and... I was scared you wouldn’t want to go through another marriage.”

Your heart melted at his honesty, your fingers tightening around his as you leaned into him, resting your head on his shoulder. “Jongho... I could never say no to you,” you whispered, your voice tender and full of affection. “You’ve been so wonderful to me... more than I ever thought I deserved.”

His arms wrapped around you, holding you close as he pressed a gentle kiss to the top of your head. You felt his lips linger there, his breath warm against your hair. Then, he pulled back just enough to look down at you, his eyes twinkling with mischief.

“So... you’d never say no to me?” he hummed, his voice low and teasing.

You looked up at him, your eyebrows knitting together in confusion. “Of course not... why—”

Before you could finish your sentence, his gaze flicked back to the hotel, his smile growing sly. Then, he leaned in closer, his lips brushing against your ear as he whispered, “Then how about we head back to the room... and celebrate our engagement properly?”

A shiver ran down your spine at his words, heat rushing to your cheeks as his meaning became clear. You felt his fingers tighten around your waist, his body pressing just a little closer as his breath tickled your neck.

Your heart skipped a beat, and a playful smile curved at your lips. “I’d never say no to that,” you whispered back, your voice laced with anticipation. Jongho had a smirk curl on his lips as he leaded you back to the hotel room.

You both didn't waste any time. Jongho lifted you up and threw you on the bed, now hovering over you. You snaked your arms around his neck and caressed his face softly feeling how warm his cheeks are.

"My soon-to-be husband looks to handsome tonight..." you whisper. He stares into your eyes and grabs your hand from his face. bringing it down. You notice his eyes are now dark with lust and need. Jongho smashes his lips against yours, hungrily kissing you before sliding his tongue in which causes a shock wave to send shivers down your spine.

You moan at the feeling as both of you make out. Jongho is first to pull away and he breaths out heavily staring into your eyes. He starts to unbutton his shirt, and you pull your clothes off. You help him unzip his pants and pulling off his clothes.

Jongho gets on the bed with you and looks at you before speaking. "I want to try to please you this way..." he hums as you feel two fingers brush against your folds. You felt one finger enter in between your folds causing you to moan softly. He watches your reaction and smirks.

"So wet and so soft..." he whispers teasing you. You huff out at his response and continue moaning as he starts moving inside you.

"Oh my god..." you moan softly grabbing his arm looking into his eyes completely helplessly. You soon felt another finger enter you causing you to throw your head back moaning his name. He smirks enjoying your reactions, soon pressing his thumb against your clit rubbing circles.

"Jongho please!" You cry out feeling your entire body melt on the bed and feeling a bubble forming in your lower stomach. His other hand grabs onto your wrists pinning them over your head.

"Fuck!" You curse feeling extreme pleasure as he starts fucking you harder with two fingers deep in your soaked cunt. It wasn't long until you were thrown over the edge and moaned loudly squirting on his fingers. Jongho was satisfied how he treated you. Your legs were shaking, out of breath panting hard and whimpered as he pulled his two fingers out which was covered in your slick.

"So hot..." he whispers now ready to do the real thing with you. You can't believe he made you lose your mind with just 2 fingers. Jongho lifted your legs over his waist and slowly pressed the tip against your folds, ready to go in and destroy you.

----------------------------------

You felt Jongho's cock slide inside you very easily since you were already extremely wet. Jongho didn't waste any time, already thrusting in and out of you causing you to moan in pure bliss. You don't know why this time felt different, but it most likely had to do with Jongho now being your fiancé.

Jongho gripped your palm pinning it on the bed interlocking your fingers together. You moaned feeling his shaft sliding in and out of you.

"I love you so much!" You moan out feeling his palm pressing your palm down harder. Your other hand rests on his chest digging your nails into him.

"Fuck." He cursed, fucking you deeply into the mattress. You felt your stomach tighten inside feeling extreme pleasure. Jongho went down and kissed your lips roughly almost biting on your lips hungrily. You moaned deep into the kiss arching your back feeling him hit your sensitive spot. One your pulled away from the kiss and cried out as he was now slamming into your sensitive spot. You felt you were going to have another orgasm coming up soon.

"Holy fuck Jongho!" You cursed breathing hot and heavy. You saw him smirk at you before going back to sloppily make out with you. You couldn't take it anymore and started squirming underneath him until he pinned your waist down aggressively. You were sure there would be bruises tomorrow. you felt his lips travel down your chin to your neck nibbling and sucking on the skin.

"I can't take it... anymore!" you whimpered feeling tears form in your eyes feeling extremely over stimulated. Jongho whispers in your ear groaning as he kept pounding into you.

"Fuck... I want to impregnate you..." He groans, his thrusts getting sloppier. You both were moaning and sweating like crazy. You have never heard Jongho say that which immediately tipped you over the edge as you squirted again this time on his cock.

"Fuck!" You curse legs trembling again until you now felt Jongho soon coming inside you. You felt hot liquid fill you up and his thrusts start slowing down. You were breathing extremely heavily, chest puffing out and you felt the mattress below you completely soaked.

"Holy shit..." Jongho cursed realizing how crazy this sex session was. He pulled out and pulled you onto his lap to hold you.

"Did you really mean it by you wanted to impregnant me...?" You asked genuinely curious. His face turned deep red, and he looked away for a second.

"I can stop taking my birth control..." You whisper causing his face to heat up.

"I didn't mean to say that I am so sorry..." He apologized, he commented how he was too in the moment with you and was only thinking with his cock.

"If you want, we can wait for a while and try again to get me pregnant." you tease causing Jongho to try to shut the conversation down, but you laugh at his reaction.

"I'm serious though, maybe when we are married in the future... I don't mind starting a family with you... I want to be with you forever." You mention resting your head on his chest as you were slowly falling asleep. Jongho was silent but held you towards him.

“I would also love to start a family with you, Y/N,” Jongho whispered, his voice tender as he pressed a soft kiss to your forehead. His arms wrapped around you securely, his fingers gently rubbing circles on your shoulder as you snuggled closer to him.

You rested your hand on his, absentmindedly rubbing your ring finger against his, feeling the cool metal of the engagement ring that now symbolized forever. You couldn’t help but smile as you admired the rings on both of your fingers, their sparkle reflecting the promise of a lifetime together.

Looking up at him, your eyes softened, love overflowing as you whispered, “I still can’t believe I’m going to marry my divorce attorney.” You teased, a playful grin on your lips.

Jongho chuckled, his eyes crinkling as his smile widened. “I guess I was always meant to be by your side... in every way possible.” His voice was warm, his fingers brushing through your hair as he leaned down to capture your lips in one last sweet, lingering kiss.

You hummed contently, the warmth of his touch and the steady beat of his heart beneath your ear lulling you to sleep. You curled up against his chest, his arms tightening around you protectively as you drifted off, feeling safe and loved in his embrace.

As your eyes fluttered shut, you heard his voice, soft and gentle. “I love you... and I always will.”

And with that, you fell asleep in his arms, dreaming of the beautiful future waiting for you both.

•

Brb sobbing, I AM SO SOFT RIGHT NOW I NEED THIS MAN SO BAD. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this small Jongho Series. :) I have another one already in the works for part 1 of the next Jongho series :3 Please be tuned for that. After the first part I will open Tag List for y'all (it will be longer) and a TON of smut and angst.

[mindhealing]

The Sun Exists!

Life will always be what it will be no matter how hard you try to make it what you want it to be, mostly out of a selfish need and desire for control over your life and life experiences. It's absolutely a good thing to desire the best out of life and life experiences, it's amazing to want to be better and do better, and it is courageous to want a life of bliss and ecstasy, abundance and success and be ready to do anything and everything that it takes to get the job done. What is absolutely not right is wanting things to go your own way and be as you want, without recourse to what your life's mission and destiny is or is meant to be and coming into oneness with the divine process and timing of your life and life experiences. Life will push you in the right direction and if you are headed in the wrong one, then life's challenges and issues, problems and troubles only show that you are on the wrong trajectory and have to change course. When you don't understand that life with all it's challenges and problems, issues, struggles and troubles, are actually a blessing in disguise, because it helps you understand where you are on the course of your life's journey and where you are headed. They help you see, know and understand whether you are making the right choices and decisions or not, and yet life still gives you the opportunity to reverse and now head in the right direction. As long as you stay on the course and trajectory of your life and life experiences, life will always lend you a helping hand in the course work of existence and reality. You are never given more than you can handle and all situations, happenings, events, circumstances and conditions, are all about life bringing you face to face with yourself. How can you become the Master of your fate, destiny and life if you haven't discovered your true and authentic self, this can only come via the way of suffering, hardships and despair which is the driving force that pushes you to seek to know yourself and the truth of life, like Socrates said "Man know thyself" and Rumi said "Man is a God clothed in rags begging for alms and bowing before his servants because he is oblivious of his true identity".

When you have the courage to choose yourself over and over again, life opens up the truth to you when you disconnect from your mind and it's attendant negativity, negative mindset, thoughts and emotions that created the narratives, stories and drama of your life and life experiences, and that you have believed to be true and all you. You go into losing hope mode because you want a different life, life experiences and circumstances, not seeing nor understanding that the answer and solution is within arms reach - within you and not in the world about you. When you accept responsibility for what life was and the new state it's going to be, you then surrender to the divinity within you, everything changes and that's when you see and know that the sun exists, and has always existed even in the darkness and despair that you have suffered or are suffering. When you disconnect from the mind and reconnect with the divinity within you, your Higher Self which is your authentic self waiting to connect with you and show you the truth about yourself, you find out the secret of the ages - you are a Magnificent Being of pure Light and Love, more powerful than you can ever know or imagine. It's time to move forward and not backwards or no longer backwards again, time to choose growth, success, progress and development over comfort, misery and anxiety, time to choose possibility over impossibility, the present here and now over the past and past events. You are worthy of everything and anything that you want and desire in your life and life experiences, even though the mind makes you think and believe otherwise, and this is the time and the opportunity to change the narratives, stories and drama of your life and life experiences going forward.

If you are seeking a great life and life experiences with the sun shining so bright, then seek it with joy and happiness in your heart, with gratitude and acceptance for the many blessings of life both good and bad. Remember - abundance flourishes in a grateful heart, so be grateful, joyful and loving for the many blessings not yet seen but hoped for, and see the magic and wonder of life brought forth to life and the manifestation of all that you want and desire. Be hopeful for today, tomorrow and all the days of your life and dwell not not head in the direction of darkness because the sun truly exists and will shine forth, when you are in the right state of consciousness and mind, the right mindset of positivity, positive mindset, thoughts and emotions. There is a force in the universe which, if you permit and allow it to lead you and guide you all the days of your life and life experiences, will flow through you and produce miraculous changes in your life via transforming your circumstances, happenings, situations, events, and conditions of life from negativity to positivity. To reach your full potential and excel in life, you must clear and free the mind of all the clutter that hinders and hampers the flow of the power within you, and be present in the flow of life current. Let the mind flow like water gently and easily, moving round obstacles and blockages with determination and persistence. Face life with a calm and quiet mind which is only connected to the divinity within you and everything will flow.

Be honest with yourself about what you really want in your life and life experiences, and what you want to accomplish. Sometimes, your goals, dreams and desires are  based on what other people think and say you should do or become and not on what you want to do and be, it's time to change that. Hope is not just an emotion, it is a way of life and living life, a way of thinking or cognitive process that allows you to stay grounded in whatever conditions and situations that are prevailing in your life, knowing, believing and trusting that everything will be alright in the end. There is only one thing that makes a dream, desire, goal or objective impossible to achieve, that is the fear of failure and mockery. Instead of fighting the darkness and being scared of it and all that it brings, be the one to light a candle and welcome it into your space, allowing it to teach you what it has come to teach you and bless you, knowing and understanding that it cannot be otherwise. It leaves when its work is done and the lesson is learnt, but also blessing you with a new and different viewpoint of life, state and space of consciousness and mind. Do not stare at the steps to success, longingly and desirously, but rather take the plunge and step up the stairs, a step at a time and take everything in your stride. Step out and stride forward with a firm, confident and steady step knowing with a deep and calm certainty, that you will reach every goal you have set for yourself no matter how long it takes, and no matter what life may bring your way or throw at you. The sun always shines and Tough times don't last but Tough people do.

More to come.

[lullabyes22-blog]

Snippet - We Are Fucked - Forward, but Never Forget/XOXO

Forward but Never Forget/XOXO

Snippet:

"The Ditch. It's not far from the Shimmer Fields, is it?"

"It's not." Sevika's breath comes as if drawn through a pinched straw. "That's where the 'and then some' comes in."

Silco braces himself.

"The fields, sir." She swallows. "They're dead. Whatever that blue shit last night was—it's burnt them to a crisp."

"Burnt?"

"The blackflower reserves. The harvest vats. The processing plants. It's all gone."

"Even the stockpiles?"

"There's nothing left. Not a petal, leaf, or stalk. The blast wiped everything out."

Her eyes, gunmetal in rings of black, lock on his. There's no fear or denial there. Only the hard bullseye of certainty.

We, her eyes say, are fucked.

Silco concurs, with a single nod.

Shimmer is Zaun's beating heart. If it flatlines, the city is finished. Their main export is gone; their industries will tank. Breakthroughs with medicinal Shimmer will go belly-up. Backdoor deals with the Council will fall apart. Their footholds in Piltover's economy—all that painstaking groundwork over the months—will crumble.

Investors will flee in a mass exodus. The chem-barons will turn on him like a pack of rabid dogs.  The rest of his network will fracture and cannibalize itself. All the strays he's sheltered—Dustin, Ran, Lock, Avi, Posky—will be flung back to the old hell of bloodsports, human auctions, and streetside debasement. Dustin will end up OD'ing before the month is done. Ran will wind up on the slaver's chopping block. Lock will fall back to the fighting pits, a dead-eyed shell of his old self. Avi will fly straight into Bilgewater, only to be blasted into fish-fodder. Posky, poor boy, will end up in some brothel's basement: the kind with cages, where the clients get to choose their favorite cut of meat.

And Sevika?

She'll survive. Of that, he has no doubt. But he'd lose her. Not as his bedmate or his XO; he'd lose her faith. And, in losing it, win a knife to the ribs.

Sevika's not the type to forgive betrayal of that scale.

Nor can he fault her.

He'd promised them a brighter tomorrow. Promised a future, not an endless present of pain. A city that was more than a safe harbor, but an ethos, an ideology, an unshakable self-belief.

Now, that promise is in shreds.

There's a saying in the Undercity: A disloyal motherfucker is born dead every minute.

For Silco, it'll be a fitting epitaph.

He dares not seek Medarda's aid. She'll never condescend to bankroll an exportless economy; her gold, when she deigns to dole it out, is not alms, but a gauntlet. Prove yourself worthy, or perish. Now, having already invested so heavily in their partnership, she won't cut her losses right off. But he'll be left in the unenviable position of owing her his balls on a golden platter.

She will make the most of the meal. She'll leverage his failure for her own ends: leverage him along with it. Silco shudders to imagine his ambitions shredded like sweetmeats between her pretty white teeth. Feels the shudder deepen to icewater as he pictures Medarda standing over him, gloved fingers on his chin, forcing his eyes up. Smiling as she orders him to take it all down his throat: his pride, his dignity, and all that gold.

She'd enjoy it, the bitch.

And after she's had her fun—dragged him to the gutter of her satisfaction and the slaughterhouse of his self-respect—she'll hand him off. To the next bored blueblood with a fetish for slumming it, or simply to the high courts for his crimes against her Council.

He'll be back where he'd begun: a rat on the run, with no recourse except a fast-track to ruin.

And Jinx—

Silco breathes. In, and out. Wills the pressure in his lungs to recede. Wills the terror to a place where it can't touch him. Wills himself to a place where nothing touches him, and lives: the place where the Monster is submerged. 

And, as blood pools between the Monster's teeth, he thinks:

You’ll never drag me back down: whole or in pieces.

I’ll kill every last one of you before I let that happen.

I’ve got nothing left to lose. Nothing but Jinx.

And to keep her, he'll burn down whatever's left of his soul. Will turn the whole goddamned city to dust.

Watch it burn.

[kanawolf]

I love Lukas (Fire Emblem Echoes) so much you guys. Like ... He's so good???? He just, he does his fucking best and his best and is actually very good; but he's also very good at very quickly adapting to situations, more so than like... 90% of the other characters. Mycen isn't home and won't join the Deliverance but his grandson and said grandsons friends will? Sure, that's totally fine. Clive passing on leadership to Alm very suddenly and pissing off Fernand in the process? Yeah that's reasonable, Lukas will just be an advisor to Alm as well still, like he has been on the march to the Deliverances hideout. Clive seemingly starts to falter in his belief in Alm? Well Lukas doesn't really give a shit if Alm is actually Mycens grandson or not, he's proven himself regardless, so he's gonna keep on supporting Alm - even when he recruits Rigelians and goes "out of their way" to rescue a captured village girl - because Alm truly believes in trying to save everyone regardless of birth and Lukas can get behind that.

And even towards the end of the game! He just adapta and remains I think such a true and constant presence for Alm! Cause like, oh, Alm is actually the prince of Rigel? Well, we still have things to do and battles to fight so Lukas still fights alongside him. And his end game dialogue against Duma??? My man was just absolutely ready to fuck some shit up and remain exceedingly calm in the process.

I just wish so badly that Lukas and Alm had an actual support chain!!! They deserved it!! And tbh I think Alm had a little bit better of an understanding of Lukas compared to Clive - at the very least, I don't think Alm would've called Lukas a "cold observer to keep him in line". I know that gets addressed later in the supports between Lukas and Clive but it still rankles me a little bit.

Anywho. I love Lukas so much. He deserves all the love

[fsnowzombie]

You literally never stop cooking do you? Managing to hit ALM so often must be tiring. You have such an incredibly distinct style. The lines, the coloring, the shading, the expressions. I hope you never find your creative process dull because man, you hit it out of the park every time.

Question though: You recently did a kitty survivorship bias piece. But I scrolled down this dang blog well into 2022/21's posts and basically only saw like, two other pieces referencing your miqote! Think we could get a much more sensibly armored kot sometime?

oh my goodness, thank you very much for your kind words! i would be lying if i said i never feel unmotivated, i think if you look long enough to some of my monday drawings you can definetly see some looking better than others but that is just kinda part of growing your own style and artistic voice, and as it is with any hobby/work, there are mondays when i reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally dont want to do it lmao and days when im so excited i start them on sunday, it really depends

as for your question, i dont post my miqo a lot to begin with since that character is not one of the ones i play with the most, by volume you could probably guess which 2 are the ones i play the most, and in the case of the miqo, as the survivorship bias drawing can lead to is that she doesnt wear a lot of fabric to begin with lmaoo, as for sensible armor for her specifically i coulr probably justify it by placing mountains of snow around her for her to be wearing useful coverage armor hahaha.

altough i draw her a bit more frequently in my more risque blog @sharpxfangs shes honestly a character i designed specifically to be drawn in compromising positions and/or clothing

[good-beans]

Dropping random song associations, Echoes edition :3

I have a little RBG playlist here! (Forsyth -> Python -> Lukas)

Idistaviso is a very Alm-to-Berkut song, familial betrayal and all that

Oracles always makes me think of Celica!! Kinda from Mila’s pov but it could be anyone – chosen one fated to bring peace and honor the past even when it’s gone

James Picard makes me think of Berkut (and Duma,) and in an angsty mood, Alm…

Much looser with the lyrics, but String theocracy has always given me Rinea vibes. Something about her being aware and annoyed at her role as just a prop/theatrically interesting device and processing that

[polinamory]

Just a piece of my daydreaming

tw blood torture and mention of death

At some point, Dream began to pray. There was simply nothing else to do. God's alms are his last hope. He did not even ask for release or an end to the torture. He didn't ask for food or sunlight. Dream didn't need it anymore.

He asked for death.

Any. Dream himself believed that he did not deserve a painless death. Sometimes in his prayers he wished for a knife or a sword. At least one piece of glass. Not that Dream thought he would be able to kill himself, but he wouldn't give up the right to try.

More often than not, he whispered prayers at the end of Quackity's visits.

"I wish I could bleed to death."

Then Dream tried to look as non-painful as possible, so that Quackity would think that he could stand it more. To deliver a blow that he couldn't survive. So that he doesn't have time to run to the bars for regeneration potions and a bucket of cold water.

Coming back from the dead is the worst feeling of all. When Dream was already mentally saying goodbye to everyone and allowed himself a slight smile, thinking that it was over, but then he woke up screaming on the floor again, in a puddle of water, blood and potions. And then Quackity punished him for it. Quackity did not give permission to die.

Another unpleasant experience is getting lost in days. When he lost consciousness in the process of another torture, and woke up when the bars were lowered again and Quackity started a new one.

[pompomqt]

Journey to the West Chapter 50

This chapter of Journey to the West with @journeythroughjourneytothewest marks the end of book 2, and is the midway point of the entire story. We're halfway there everyone, so let's get into it shall we?

So the gang are walking along, and since we've had to many river adventures lately, it's time for another mountain one. Tripitaka as usual expresses his worry over wolves and tigers, and Monkey once again assures him that he has nothing to worry about since he has them. Anyways so they walk along the mountain for a while before Tripitaka starts getting hungry, and just in time to since he spots some lights in the distance that must be a village or something they can stay at.

However once Monkey takes a look at the place he goes 'Nope. Can't do it. It's demon infested.' Luckily Tripitaka is willing to take his word for it, at least for the moment, but the problem that he is still hungry remains. So Monkey has Tripitaka dismount so he can rest while Monkey goes to fetch him some food from somewhere. He gives Sandy the reins to the horse an tells him to just wait here and guard master until he comes back. With that settled, Monkey is about to leave but seems to think better of it with Tripitaka's track record of summoning man eating demons by just breathing. So he uses his staff to draw a protection circle around them. He tells them not to leave the circle because it will be able to protect them, when Tripitaka agrees and settles in, Monkey finally feels secure enough to leave him for the time being.

So Monkey finds some random village 1000 miles due south from them, and goes to beg for some food. The random village person he asks is surprised to see him, and says if he wants to head west he's probably better off trying to find the main road then beg for food here. Monkey tells him that's not a problem, and that his master is waiting for him there now. When the villager questions if Tripitaka won't starve to death by the seven days it should take Monkey to travel that far, Monkey assures him that such a journey will only take him a few minutes at most. The villager decides that, that is a major red flag, and he'd really rather not deal with something like Monkey, who must be a ghost or something and tries to turn him down.

The man tries to tell him to just go somewhere else, after all, their dinner isn't even ready yet, but Monkey insists that he can wait. The man tries whacking Monkey with his staff to get him to go away, and Monkey just kind of lets him to get it out of his system. He says the man can hit him as much as he wants, but each hit will cost him one pint of rice. Hearing this the man slams his door shut and runs into his house screaming about ghosts and whatever. Since the man said that they were currently in the process of cooking dinner, Monkey decides to just go to the kitchens to serve himself, so he turns himself invisible and waltzes right in. Seeing the cooked rice he fills his alms bowl before taking off to return to Tripitaka.

Meanwhile Tripitaka is getting bored of waiting for Monkey, and Pigsy, the voice of unreason, agrees. He says that Monkey is probably just playing around while leaving them imprisoned here at the mercy of the tigers and demons, after all, how can a circle possibly protect them? They should just go to that village they saw before and get some food and shelter there, Monkey is fast anyways, he'll be able to catch up no problem. Thoroughly persuaded by this plan, Tripitaka leaves the circle and the four of them head towards the demon infested buildings. Dang it Sandy, Monkey left you in charge to be the voice of common sense!

They make their way to a fancy manor, and since no one is outside to greet them, Pigsy says he'll go in and talk to them. Which is not the usual plan of Tripitaka using his pretty privilege to let them get their way, but he agrees to it anyway, and just tells Pigsy not to offend anyone. Pigsy say's he'll be fine since he's acquired some manners since becoming a bhuddist, so he walks inside in a civil manner. Before abandoning all civility when he goes to the second floor to find a large skeleton, and three silk vests, which he of course immediately takes. In Pigsy's defense he does spare a few tears and words for the skeleton before stealing from his house, so I guess he really has learned some manners.

Pigsy comes back outside and tells them about the skeleton and the three vests he found. He encourages Tripitaka to wear one of them to get warm. Tripitaka however is horrified, and reprimands Pigsy for stealing, and tells him to put it back. Pigsy however says that it's not stealing if there are no witnesses around and puts a vest on anyways, with Sandy following suit. As soon as they put them on however, the vests immediately constrict turning themselves into straitjackets and binding them. Whaaaaat? A trap? What a turn of events! Who could have seen this coming? Tripitaka makes sure to yell at them loudly enough to wake the whole demon town while he tries to untie them. And sure enough the whole group is then captured.

So Tripitaka is forced to kneel to the demon of the week, and try and explain why they were stealing their garments. Tripitaka of course tearfully explains the story and says that they were of course going to return the vest, and begs the demon to spare their lives. The Demon of course has no intention of sparing them, especially not since Tripitaka is the delicious golden cicada he has heard so much about. Luckily before he can go to far into making his dinner plans, Pigsy chimes in that their other disciple is the Great Sun Wukong who caused great havoc in heaven five hundred years ago. As usual this gives the demon pause, so he decides to just tie them up and wait until he's captured Sun Wukong so he can kill and eat them all together.

Meanwhile, Sun Wukong has returned to where he left them, only to find his protection circle empty, and not only that the demon village from earlier is also gone. So Monkey starts dejectedly following the horse tracks to try and find his wayward master, when suddenly he comes across two travels, an old and young man. Monkey decides to ask them if they have seen his companions, and the old man answers that he saw them get kidnapped by the Great King One-Horned Buffalo, who is a rather powerful demon apparently. Monkey isn't fussed about the possible danger, and is about to offer the old man the rice he got as thanks, when suddenly the two reveal themselves to be the local mountain gods. They offer to preserve the rice for him to give to Tripitaka later, Monkey is pissed at the subterfuge, but allows them to take the rice anyways.

So Monkey finds his way to the demon's lair, and tells the minion demon's that are guarding the door to go tell their master to release his master. So the minions tell the Buffalo demon that Wukong is here to pick a fight, which the demon is hyped about, after all he's been looking for a good fight. So the demon gets dressed in his armor and grabs his spear and goes out looking for a fight along with his minion army. So Monkey once again repeats that the demon should give him back his Master, but the demon replies that, he only captured Tripitaka because he was stealing from him. Monkey says that Tripitaka would never do that! Which is right, but unfortunately Pigsy would do that, so the two begin to fight.

The two fight for a while and the Demon is very impressed by Wukong's abilities, saying his abilities really are worthy of someone who caused so much trouble in heaven. Eventually though, the Demon orders his demons to attack- which is never really a problem for Sun Wukong. And indeed Wukong throws his staff into the air to duplicate it and take out all the minions at once. Turns out this is what the demon was waiting for however, since the demon then tosses up a shiny fillet and tosses it into the air and sucks up Monkey's staff. Monkey now unarmed, flee's the battle to re-evaluate his life choices.

Current Sun Wukong Stats: Names/Titles: Monkey, The Stone Monkey, The Handsome Monkey King, Sun Wukong (Monkey awakened to the void), Bimawen (Banhorseplague), The Great Sage Equal To Heaven and Pilgrim Sun. Immortality: 5 + 94,000 years Weapon: The Compliant Golden Hooped Rod (Sucked into a fillet) Abilities: 72 Transformations, Cloud-Somersault, Ability to transform his individual hairs, super strength, Ability to Summon Wind, Water restriction charm, and the ability to change into a huge war form, ability to duplicate his staff, ability to immobilize others, the ability to put others to sleep, and the Fiery eyes and Diamond Pupils, intimidating horses, churning large bodies of water, sleeplessness, seizing the wind, enhanced smell, discerning good and evil within a thousand miles, Spirit Summoning, lock picking, object transformation, distance reduction, vanishing in a flash of light, super healing, transforming others, and invisibility Demon Kill Count: 9+ Unknown Number of Minions Human Kill Count: 1009 God's Defeated: 22 + Unknown number Defeats: 6 Crime List: Robbery, Murder, Mass Murder, Arson, Theft, Coercion, Threatening a Government Official, Resisting Arrest, Assault, Forgery, Employee Theft, False Imprisonment, Impersonating a Government Official, Treason, attempted murder, failure to control or report a dangerous fire, desecrating a corpse, breaking and entering, trespassing, violating Tree Law, looting corpses, trading counterfeit goods, criminal threat, animal abuse, Assisting or Instigating Escape, Damage to Religious Property, contaminating a substance for human consumption and Identity Fraud. Cry Count: 7 + 3 fake cries Mountains Trapped Under: 4

Current Tang Sanzang stats: Names/Titles: River Float, Xuanzang, Tang Sanzang, Tripitaka and the Tang Monk Abilities: Curing Blindness, making branches point a certain direction (allegedly), reciting sutras, pretty privilege, memorization, Heart Sutra and Meditation. Cry Count: 26 Tight Fillet Spell Uses: 31 Paralyzed by fear: 5 Bandit Problems: 2 Kidnapped by demons: 8 Falling Off Horses: 8

Current Bai Long Ma Stats: Names/Titles: Bai Long Ma (White Dragon Horse), Prince of the Western Ocean, and third prince jade dragon of the dragon king Aorun Abilities: Transforming into a human, a water snake, and a horse, eating a horse in one bite, flight, Magic of Water Restriction, Singing, and Sword Dancing. Cry Count: 1 Crime List: Arson, and Grave Disobedience. Contributions to the plot: 2 Kidnapped by demons: 1

Current Zhu Wuneng Stats: Names/Titles: The Marshal of the Heavenly Reeds, Zhu Wuneng (Pig who is aware of ability), Zhu Ganglie, Pigsy, Idiot and Eight Rules. Weapon: Rake Abilities: 36 Transformations, parting water, fighting underwater, cloud soaring, size enhancement and CPR Demon Kill Count/Kill steals: 2 Kidnapped by Demons: 4 Human Kill Count: 1 Failed Flirtation/romances Attempts: 3 Cry Count: 2 Crime List: Sexual Harassment, Murder, Kidnapping, arson, defamation, Damage to Religious Property, contaminating a substance for human consumption, Identity Fraud and Theft

Current Sha Wujing Stats: Names/Titles: The Curtain-Raising General, Sha Wujing (Sand Aware of Purity), Sandy and Sha Monk Weapon: Monster Taming Staff Abilities: Fighting underwater and Cloud soaring. Demon Kill Count: Unknown number of minions. Kidnapped by Demons: 3 Human Kill Count: 1 Crime List: Breaking a Crystal Cup, murder, desecration of a human corpse, Damage to Religious Property and contaminating a substance for human consumption

Previous - Masterpost - Next

[justinspoliticalcorner]

Don Moynihan at Can We Still Govern?:

Members of the DOGE network rarely offer thoughtful accounts that depart from the Musk narrative (government is broken, full of talentless hacks, DOGE is fixing things). So I was interested to see a DOGEr express genuine circumspection. This came from Sahil Lavingia, a startup founder, who was interviewed by Ernie Smith about his experience with DOGE. Lavignia left his start-up, Gumroad, to join Veteran’s Affairs. Here is the key passage:

[Now that he’s there, he says he finds himself surrounded by people who “love their jobs,” who came to the government with a sense of mission driving their work. “In a sense, that makes the DOGE agenda a little bit more complicated, because if half the government took [a buyout offer], then we wouldn’t have to do much more,” he says, implying software can replace departing employees. “We’d just basically use software to plug holes. But that’s not what’s happening.”…when it comes down to it, what he’s found is a machine that largely functions, though it doesn’t make decisions as fast as a startup might. “I would say the culture shock is mostly a lot of meetings, not a lot of decisions,” he says. “But honestly, it’s kind of fine—because the government works. It’s not as inefficient as I was expecting, to be honest. I was hoping for more easy wins.”]

For anyone with a modicum of experience studying or working in government, nothing Lavignia discovered is novel. Public servants care about public service! There is not really that much waste in government! There are too many meetings and decisionmaking is too slow! Indeed, sir! All true! To his credit, Lavignia was willing to acknowledge his prior beliefs were wrong. That is a hard thing for any human to do, and something I have not seen from any other DOGE official, certainly not Musk. The exception offers insight to the rule: DOGErs simply don’t understand the government they are destroying, and are unwilling to learn.

DOGE could have learned a lot by just talking to public employees

This sounds obvious to say, but people handed extraordinary power that affects the lives of others should know what they are doing. If they don’t know important stuff, they should want to learn it before exercising consequential decisions. But DOGE has failed to meet even these banal standards. A trademark of DOGE was the toxic combination of arrogance and ignorance. Some DOGE members have real and impressive achievements, some do not. But all of those achievements are in the private sector. They know almost nothing about government except conspiracy theories from the internet, or negative interactions with the regulators who oversee their businesses. They did not understand where government spent its money, and that it was not full of waste. They could have talked to career public employees or nonpartisan government experts. But they didn’t because they did not want to know. Their closest advisors about how government worked were partisan ideologues who want to upend the constitution, Stephen Miller and Russ Vought. Random X posters seem to have more input on the fate of USAID than any policy experts.

This arrogance has had real consequences, including half-assed administrative changes. DOGE ignored their own pick to run Social Security when he told them that their fraud numbers were wrong. They insisted on administrative changes to detect fraud in SSA phone calls. As Natalie Alms reports, the result was that they found two cases of probably fraudulent phone calls out of 110,000. (Or a fraud rate of 0.0018%). But the extra checks they put in place to chase the phantom fraud were not costless: they slowed the processing of retirement claims by 25%. Why did SSA employees not resist the change? According to a former senior SSA official: “People lacked the fortitude to tell DOGE there was no fraud because they were afraid to lose their jobs. They knew there was no fraud.” It’s not just that DOGE was unwilling to listen: they would fire anyone willing to speak up.

A missed opportunity

A lot of people really wanted DOGE to succeed, or more specifically, they wanted the idealized version of DOGE — smart tech folks disrupting bureaucracy — to succeed. This includes me: when I warned that DOGE would be a disaster right before the Trump inauguration, I felt real ambivalence. Was this just my natural cynicism? Just a couple of days later Will Oremus in the Washington Post asked me, Jen Pahlka and Bridget Dooling to make the case for the best and worst case scenarios for DOGE. Needless to say, the worst case scenarios proved more accurate, and even understated the case, but it was not hard to imagine how things might go well. [...] There are lots of things DOGE does not get about how to manage in the public sector. This overview of the senior talent that DOGE has pushed out of government is simply an extraordinary indictment of it’s incompetence. But there is one particular type of knowledge that DOGE really missed out on which is unforgivable: how tech works in government. Some of those who wanted DOGE to succeed were government technologists, frustrated at the slow pace of change they saw during their time in government. Many were ready to welcome fellow technologists with the influence to transform government. But they were isolated, ignored, fired or resigned. In doing so, DOGE missed their best opportunity to actually live up to their brand as tech disruptors who could fix things. Now, their brand will be the tech bros who broke government. The civic tech movement in the federal government was a decade old when DOGE arrived (the US Digital Service and 18F were created in 2014). I have been tracking the evolution of civic tech, because I think it represents one path for the future of American government. That path could have merged with DOGE, creating a single broad vision of tech-driven change in government. Instead, in now offers a competing vision. I think its worth unpacking some of those differences in a bit more detail. [...]

DOGE’s undemocratic workarounds will fail

There are a couple of big differences between DOGE and civic tech. One is motivational. The civic tech movement is, broadly, driven by prosocial motivations. They believed that government it slow and unwieldy, but that at some basic level it remains a fundamental means to help a lot of people. If you believe that, it makes sense to work at making the structure of government function. It make sense to invest time in building cool products that can be iterated and improved upon over time (Direct File is a good example).

DOGE mostly believes that government is irredeemably broken, wasteful and fraudulent. If you believe that, it makes sense to downsize government as much as possible, and contract out what you cannot. It makes sense not to build cool products (DOGE killed Direct File) but to build AI that cuts the humans out of the process and automate as much as possible. The fact that DOGE claims about fraud have proven to be erroneous should be a huge red flag about how the assumptions that will be embedded into their AI builds will prove to be wrong in ways that could be catastrophic. The other main difference between DOGE and civic tech was the attitudes to constraints. Both DOGE and civic tech employees would probably agree that government has too many constraints. The civic tech solution was largely to find ways to work with or manage those constraints. This included user guides to “hack your bureaucracy.” The DOGE approach has been largely to ignore the constraints. The Privacy Act of 1974 that civic tech people complained about? Pretend it does not exist. Pursue the type of data pooling for surveilling in the context of an increasingly aggressively police state.

The problem of Musk, and DOGE is not a problem of technological capabilities enabled by data sharing and AI. Those capabilities are here, present in the private sector as well as public. The problem is a governance one: laws that exist to constrain the use of data are being ignored. Writing new laws will not solve the problem of people ignoring existing laws. Civic tech folks complained about their limited ability to shape government. They never had a champion like Musk. But they also largely respected hierarchy and lines of control. Some of the turf issues that occur in any government happened. But the idea of the US Digital Service, rather than the Secretary of the Treasury, trying to appoint the acting head of the IRS is unthinkable. But Musk did so. The idea that a Cabinet Secretary would hand over all operational decisions to 18F would have been considered bizarre. But some Cabinet Secretaries have done this with DOGE. [...] Much of what DOGE is doing is illegal. Much of it will create long-term and lasting damage to America. This is the clearest example of an action that was illegal, anti-democratic, but also sped past any moral grey zones to being deeply evil. Even still, 60,000 tons of food, enough to keep millions from starving, are rotting in warehouses, blocked from release by another DOGEr, Jeremy Lewin. Per an analysis in Nature, up to 25 million people will die because of US cuts to foreign aid. Those who die will be largely the most vulnerable people in their world, their fates decided by some of the most privileged and protected people in the world.

DOGE has been nothing but a disaster to both the tech and government service.

[midnight--capricorn]

cap i wanna hear more about the echoes death fic(s) i am INTRIGUED

To be fair the more planned-out of the three (sacred stones one included, which does have some planning and because both twins got killed it's more focused on the four renais cavs, though Fomortiis/Lyon necromancy does mean that the twins still get to be here, just that they're more like Vigarde- zombies with no will of their own) is the small-scale deliverance one, I have no planning for any wider implications with Celica's side, and if I decide I do not want celica to eventually step up to her duty then valentia is just doomed, because Alm decided to never level up defense and got hit by an armour knight in Desaix's fortress- where this fic diverges is the Deliverance still won despite Alm being dead, though with their leader dead it does take a hit to morale and eventually leads to Forsyth getting ambushed by 6-8 arcanists (and this is SOV nobody survives 6-8 arcanists with the max res of about 3 at the time)

Alm being dead is only vaguely mentioned, it's not even outright stated in the current plan (though I don't think I'd actually outright mention it until it goes to the celica-side idea).

With this idea, honestly I'm not entirely sure how to start it outside of Forsyth scouting ahead while everyone else hung back until either a signal of everything being clear or a fight occurring, with Python noticing that it's oddly silent, rushing to help, and being too late- Forsyth is already dead.

Later, Forsyth's ghost wakes up, not knowing he's dead for a good while, until he sees his own grave, mistaking it as python's, until he notices python is alive and via process of elimination realising that he's the one who's dead. Though I'm not exaclty sure what I'm going to do with Alm.

I rambled a lot there but I have ideas for this (that should probably be written down and refined further for both the sacred stones side of this and the sov side of this)

[forgottenroisin]

OOC | Roisin & Event 5

so ive written here and there abt this but, since we've established that this takes place after @forgottenedmund reveals his involvement in the battle of m, im thinking that rosie is still kinda reeling from that!! im sorta hc'ing w this that that happened like...maybe literally just days ago?? lizzy, lmk ur thoughts on that? <3 but anyway!! that it was certainly recent and like!! as we all know rosie is an enneagram type 7 so her whole thing is fear of pain and like!!!!! she's been running from her father's death partially ~by throwing herself into this whole thing w edmund and that just came and slammed her really hard in the face so she is!! not doing too well w all this and its bringing everything up to the surface and this time there is nowhere to run so she's realizing she's gonna actually have to ~deal w it and like !!!!! no thanks!!!!! but here we are

so!! given all this the v last thing in the entire world she wants to do, having just learned that edmund (tho admittedly indirectly) killed her father in a fight, is go watch edmund fight!! that is the ~opposite of avoiding this whole situation which is her wish/instinct!!!!

id talked abt how i initially thought that rosie would sit this one out, but then i realized that, while she might still be on hiatus, @forgottenvalentina is def still out there scheming and she'd be processing when we last left her that it was the og girls, and not sonya/cassimir, who were drawing the varmonts to malconaire, and that arthur's officially gone so she is keeping a close eye on edmund!!!! and now that he's been missing for awhile, well, she is not gonna take this one lying down!!!!! and will def be tryna reel him back in!!!! esp bc otherwise she's just left w terrifying sebastian!!!!!!!! and lbr ~he has no claim on the throne (bartholomew: or ~does he...?)!!!!!! but anyyywayyyy!!!!! she wants ALL the varmonts back and so she wants to make a really big splash here!!! so she is not above bribing the girls w the good of malconaire and giving alms to the ppl there in need for each day, and each girl, who makes a good showing at the games!

so rosie ~will be coming, buT she will also be tryna duck out wherever she can and probs find trees and also AVOID VARMONTS (including poor @forgottencassandra who ~is an innocent bystander in all this but rosie's like 'ive been defending them both for so long as not like their dad but edmund was literally his father's weapon against us this whole time...what's cassandra hiding?' and that is NOT fair but its rosie's headspace atm)

anyway, rosie's there physically...idk that she's there emotionally tho she's def tryna pretend bc she's not ready to talk abt any of it yet and so she doesn't want anyone asking and its all part of her veneer to pretend she's always ok no matter what always anyway so yeah!! she ~will be pestering @forgottenbrigit abt her mystery man, this bran o'connor who made such a shwoing at the archery contest and was wearing her favor!!!!!!! she's really happy for her sister if she's happy!!!!!!!!! and would frankly ~much rather think abt that anyway!! laksjdflkjsdf

she's also lowkey panicking when she realizes @forgottencillian is there as lord ormond and is DEF tryna cover for him wherever/however she can and probs being like 'ok...lets go home cillian there're too many ppl here this is the stupidest thing you've ever done' and cillian's thinking 'you should hear what im planning to do ~after the competition' lasdjfkljdsfjsdf but just tryna push her away aaksdjfkljsdf and then she sees cassandra's favor and gets really mad, in light of her ~own varmont situation which she doesn't really explain to cillian (but he actually does get since he's the one who put edmund up to telling her soooo lakdjsfjsdf i will say he does feel kinda guilty in that moment bc that was all def kinda hypocritical of him but he hadn't really processed that until that moment) and storms away (smth she does whether or not edmund told her cillian was involved -- if she didn't know she's just storming off bc she can't deal w all that and that's why she's angry, too...if she ~does know then she fully called him a hypocrite and left and they are officially in a tiff as well now)

i do think she probs wants to leave just as soon as valentina will let her so yeah!! that's what an overview of what i think our girl is up to atm re: this event laksdjfjkdsf

[homericnerd]

I have a question. Its a slightly sensitive one so i hope you dont mind. I wonder what did the ancient greek society felt about the topic of suicide. Like did they think it was a sinful act like many religions these days do. Were they sympathetic towards those who lost their lives so tragically.

Mythology wise I can recall a few instances of suicide I am aware of.

Jocasta from Oedipus Rex taking her own life out of shame before her son/husband Oedipus could kill her

Ajax the Greater killing himself because he did not win Achilles' armour

And Achilles killing Hector is often said to be a metaphor for suicide. Heck even if one disagrees with the metaphor, I still think him killing hector was atleast a suicide attempt. He was destined to die after Hector is dead so by killing him he tried to speed up the process (along with avenging patroclus). Besides that, he also was about to slit his own throat upon the discovery of patroclus' corpse.

We also have Dido killing herself over Aeneas but I am not sure if I could include that because this is roman mythology.

Thanks for the question.

1.The topic is delicate and I need a lot of research, mainly for fear of spreading wrong information.

TW:

2. I can recommend good literature for a deeper study on the topic of suicide in antiquity and mythology.

● Suicide in the Ancient World" by Anton J.L. van Hooff Antiquity

●Death and the Maiden (Routledge Revivals)Girls' Initiation Rites in Greek Mythology By Ken Dowden

● Death and the Maiden: Girls' Initiation Rites in Greek Mythology" by Ken Dowden

This text will be mainly opinion and what I know about the topic

Examples from Greek and Roman mythology and literature:

As you said, examples like Jocasta, Ajax T, Queen Dido, and Achilles

Phaedra - Wife of Theseus, Phaedra falsely accused her stepson, Hippolytus, of trying to seduce her. Overcome with guilt after his death, she hanged herself.

Aegeus - King of Athens and father of Theseus. When he mistakenly believed his son had died, he leaped into the sea, which was later named the Aegean Sea.

Antigone - After being sentenced to death for burying her brother against King Creon's orders, she took her own life by hanging.

Suicide as a way through a problem and escaping shame and disgrace has existed for a long time.

One of the oldest epics The Epic of Gilgamesh: The death of Enkidu, Gilgamesh's friend, leads Gilgamesh to confront his own mortality, though suicide is not explicitly depicted. The theme of mortality and the search for meaning is central to the epic.

Mainly the suicide of Ajax T. is presented as an escape from shame, and his suicide is seen as tragic and not heroic. His actions are mainly motivated by shame to take life, but there is a divine element. His tragedy is that he is a strong and capable man who can kill everyone and everyone else, even himself.

Athena, giving alms to her beloved Odysseus, to receive something that Ajax T objects to him, according to him, deserved his relationship with Achilles. and that he deserves it equally and even more than him. I find Ajax a tragedy quite heartbreaking because his story is presented quite unheroically. He kills cows from the herd and under divine madness, imposed by Athena, the same task that Hera puts on Hercules.

Suicide is portrayed as tragic or unheroic depending on the person's role

But in Virgil's work, Queen Deino's suicide is tragic and with unrequited love from the beloved and Aeneas. In both cases, there is divine intervention from Juno and Venus to complete the plan to find a new kingdom/Rome.

I can do personality analysis, but I'm not an expert and I don't want to spread wrong information. I apologize profusely for this and for the fact that it took me so long to respond.

[beesmygod]

What's BSB's deal

hhhhuhgggghh okay. look. this is where im at in the overall explanation of bloodborne and looking into everything about old yharnam brought me to a screeching halt. like, the threads i started pulling would uncover more stuff that wasn't just the surface level lore stuff. it made me download the stupid map thing so i could actually REALLY, REALLY look at the statues in old yharnam. like i've been so stupid into it that i had to take a break bc i felt like i was becoming terminally lore-brained.

okay, so. in the chalice dungeons, there are special gilded coffins that act as chest, but they only contain things you would find in a coffin (blood, flesh, bones, etc). each of these coffins has a body in them. these bodies are decomposing in a bizarre way: they are petrifying and then crumbling (usually starting with the fingers and hands). this unusual decomposition process is depicted in the statue that blocks the entrance to old yharnam. note the hands (only the thumb has broken in the old yharnam statue):

i really, really get into detail about those coffins in the document and come to the conclusion that they were pthumerian royalty, and almost certainly entirely women. it seems like the kings were chopped into parts or used in ceremony. source: Dude Trust Me (for brevity's sake).

the statue depicts a much fresher corpse revealing that the desiccation is a result of the body becoming mummified. my theory is that pthumerian queens served the same function that "blood saints" do in yharnam and both were used as vessels for blood. ultimately, both would also be bled until they were dried up husks and then deified as saints. this same figure in the old yharnam statue also appears in the church of the good chalice.

the church of the good chalice was, of course, a place where blood was worshiped and given as alms in a process known as "blood ministration". the chalice in question permits access to the chalice dungeons. do you see all of these narrative connections. now.

as for the blood-starved beast (BSB), we fight them all over the place: in the church of the good chalice, in the hintertomb, in loran, and as a regular enemy in the nightmare where one as been swept away. but, one thing tying these locations together is that all of these places are places where one would expect to find a blood-drained saint or former queen. to make it even more explicit, there is the giant, crucified, and exsanguinated BSB being worshiped by the beast patients.

fromsoft has always loved their deliberately misleading names: the blood-starved beast is not simply hungry for blood, it's devoid of it. the flaps of its back skin are laid over its face to echo the hoods of the female church sets.

the BSB was once a blood saint of old yharnam. don't believe me still?? fine but maybe you should REALLY look at the beast before you write me off. because i don't know about you, but this looks much more like the bloodlickers of cainhurst than the beasts of yharnam!