#all of which are good it's just a lot of emotion and a strange feeling of melancholy that comes along with it
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
angeloflightandsunshine · 1 year ago
Text
Help, I've had "The Child You Were" stuck in my head for over 3 hours and it's making me very emotional and making me feel too many things!
36 notes · View notes
fearforthestorm · 9 months ago
Text
it is such a shame that rainstorms are a consistent migraine trigger for me because I love the rain so much but especially I love the way that the rain makes my city look. it goes all gray and lit-from-within at civil twilight and the skyscrapers at city center stretch up so high that the shapes lose definition and it's something that I am just so so fond of.
4 notes · View notes
dunmesh · 5 months ago
Text
okay i don't have anything smart to add i just genuinely love that these seemingly trivial jokes are actually an important part of his character. we see it throughout the entire manga, how he pushes aside his own frustration and discomfort to accommodate everyone else's and avoid needless confrontation- another example off the top of my head would be the barometz chapter in which he slowly gets frustrated with izutsumi but still tries his best to talk some sense into her calmly and soundly.
Tumblr media
and in contrast, there are very few times he expresses his anger and hurt towards others, and it usually takes a lot for him to finally lose his patience and control.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
i mean, even with kabru he tried to be polite despite the circumstances until the guy said the one thing that triggers an immense sense of shame, hurt and rage in laios. and you know, the manga does say it quite clearly early on. when we are introduced to namari and then to shuro, laios acts all friendly and shows his respect and trust in them despite how things ended between them, and everyone else gets frustrated with him for acting so strange- why are you the one who tries so hard to pacify the rest when you should be the angriest?
Tumblr media
and they don't understand him. they don't know him well enough to be able to understand, but we as readers get to see during the manga that they aren't wrong to question him- he does, in fact, feel all those ugly emotions. and it's when the winged lion finally confronts him that we see to what extent these feelings he buried so deep go, and suddenly all those funny little moments where he sometimes pretends to be mr nice guy speak volumes about his character. honestly, ryoko kui is a master at using jokes in order to define important character traits and this one doesn't fail to amaze me.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
and laios's hatred and rage and deep scars he can't get over aren't shown explicitly during most of these moments i mentioned before, but now you realize there are 26 years of emotional baggage to all of them and they sting. he is angry but he can't say shit, what difference would it make? it won't make his friends choose him instead of themselves when he needed them most, and it won't help his party get any farther. of course, this logic doesn't apply to them- they are absolutely allowed to get angry and it's fine to get mad at him, he can take that.
so after finishing the series it's so clear that he tries his best to avoid clashing with others not just due to the current circumstances and him needing to be a reliable leader but also because he knows that people don't even like him when he tries to show his good sides and hide all the rest, so who the hell would tolerate his rage and despair? who would stay after realizing that he is so deeply flawed he doesn't even like his own being?
but he does get mad. he can't help it, and sometimes it gets out of control and now everyone knows. and it's funny, isn't it? that most of those moments ended up bringing him closer to others. shuro admitting he is envy of him and actually becoming the friend laios thought he was all along, fighting for his sake and waiting for him to come back- believing in him even after he turned into a monster and searching for him the way he couldn't bring himself to do for falin when he learned of what became of her- or kabru being pushed to just let it all out because he couldn't bluff his way out of this one and get to laios any other way, so now they are even. they are both horribly honest with each other and they both choose to stay. a weird way of getting to know each other, but it is what it is.
it's simply... the more laios let himself just be, the deeper his relationships grew. and there's intimacy in being your ugly, weak and furious self around someone and them not leaving you. feeling safe enough to let it be known you are hurt and angry. and he knows that now, too.
4K notes · View notes
luveline · 4 months ago
Note
Hi!! Sometimes in ur bombshell reader fics she talks about how she has nervous energy would u ever write a bombshell reader fic where she has one of those days where she just woke up wired and Spencer tries to calm her down?
“Spencer,” you whisper. 
“What?” 
Spencer turns another page. You, across from him with your legs crossed, slouched, poke at his leg gently with your foot. “What are you reading?” 
“It’s just a book on Wyoming land boundaries.” 
You nod. Spencer watches you from across the top of his book, at first without worry, and then an attentiveness that furthers all the reasons you may or may not be in love with him. 
“You okay?” 
Everything should be fine. The case is solved. You’re heading home, without turbulence, two hours at most from touching down after a job well done. “I’m fine.” 
“You sure?” he asks. 
You smile fraughtly. You try your best to be the perfect image, to put that best foot forward, and you nail it ninety nine days out of a hundred. Nobody knows about your nervousness besides you, and that’s how you’d like it to stay, but Spencer clearly cares about you too much to look away. 
He closes his book and sets in on the table, pushing a glass into his hand. “Here,” he says, leaning forward. “It’s not poisoned.” 
You take it. Feeling his gaze, you drink a little sip that immediately goes down the wrong way. Your coughing swallow perturbs him worse. 
People tend to look at Spencer and see someone who needs more help. Even the people closest to him can doubt his ability, but as far as you’re concerned he’s proven to understand emotion quite well. He won’t shake a stranger's hand, he can’t flirt to save his life without notice, but he can make you feel better. He’s good at taking care of you, even if nobody else can see it. 
“Hey, it’s okay,” he says, leaning right over to touch both your knees at once. He pushes your skirt up a half inch with the movement, but his eyes are on your face. “You have the jitters?” 
“Think so,” you murmur. 
“Maybe it’s the air pressure.” 
You’re sure he knows you get like this sometime, but his explanation is kind. His hands on your knees are somehow strangely placed and still a natural feeling. Just like sitting together at his place to watch TV, or elbow to elbow on the train into New York, your boundaries with one another are eroding. 
“Wanna come and sit by me?” he asks, like he’s thinking the same thing. 
You laugh softly. “In all that space?” 
The seat is big enough for a larger person, but not you and Spencer together. 
He squeezes himself right to the side. “Come on,” he insists, sitting back, “just sit with me.” 
“I’ll squish you.” 
“So squish me.”
You think about it before setting your traded glass down. You don’t know why you have these weird moods, you don’t understand what it is about Spencer that can make them feel better, but he’s offering to make it go away. You have no real reason to turn him down. 
In the end, you sit in the chair beside him, ignoring Hotch’s perturbed look as you stand and then quickly plop yourself down at Spencer’s side. Your thigh has to go completely on top of his, but otherwise, it’s not so bad. It’s more room than you thought. 
It works quicker than you could imagine. With both of your heads held back the space between you is still minimal, which means his face is in detail. His hair brushed back and with the barest traces of gel, a little curled, what had Hotch said? His boyband hair.  
Spencer turns toward you, eye shadowed as he presses his forehead to the chair. “Is it just jitters?” he asks. 
“Sometimes I think I get… weird,” you say. 
“Me too.” He pulls your leg further into his lap. You’re shocked at first, but it’s a friendly move that takes the strain off of your knee. “Can I tell you something?” 
“Of course you can.” 
“I’ve started to care a whole lot less about being weird since I met you.” 
You fight the urge to touch his hair. “I don’t think it’s about caring, Spence, I just.. don’t feel right.” 
“Okay.” He nods sincerely. “Okay, well, we can work it out. We’re still hours from Virginia, you can turn your brain off. We can work it out.” 
You’re relieved to have him promise it. This isn’t the sort of thing you can work out, but it doesn’t matter, Spencer caring this much makes all the difference. You take a deep, deep breath, and you give him a grateful smile, before you rest your cheek on his shoulder. That’s just wanting, no weird feeling or jittering at the root of you as he lets a warm breath kiss your forehead, his nose pressing into your skin. 
“Don’t let anybody see,” you mumble. 
His next breath is a little shaky. “I won’t.”
See what, you’re not sure. But soon you start to feel less like you’re gonna try popping open an emergency window, and that’s enough for now. 
1K notes · View notes
headspace-hotel · 6 months ago
Text
It's important to not force your human morals onto non-human nature, like "this creature, since it disgusts me, is bad" or "this creature, since it has behaviors I interpret as sweet and heartwarming, is good"
But if you study nature whether in life or in profession, nature will make you feel disgusted and uncomfortable, it's not necessary to act as if those feelings don't exist within you, because they are part of your encounter with the otherness of nature, and contain sensitivities that can be sharpened into their own ingredient to knowledge and awareness
Coexisting with discomforting parts of the reality of Nature without trying to resolve them into a moral or aesthetic framework you are happy with, reflects maturity
It is no good to "redeem" a hated animal if the redemption is another false idea of the animal as innocent and good. This implies that a creature's "goodness" is a valid reason it deserves existence. It is also no good to treat a beloved animal with hatred to make things fair.
A good example is with dolphins and sharks, dolphins were seen as good and cute and almost human, whereas sharks were seen as bloodthirsty killers, and this has cost the lives of sharks while dolphins are given more sympathy, so some people have tried to turn it around, portraying sharks as gentle and good while pointing out that dolphins can be violent and rape other dolphins.
A lot of dolphin behaviors are certainly upsetting, definitely it makes sense to be upset that an animal can engage in what appears like cruelty, but human morality isn't made to apply to non- humans, and a particular behavior is not the entire reality of what a whole species is like. Dolphins also engage in behaviors that humans judge as friendly, compassionate, altruistic, curious and playful
Think of a particular dog or cat and the variety of complex behaviors they are capable of—an entire species, made of individuals with their own complexity, must be far more complex. All of your emotional responses to dolphins are recognizing the immense complexity of these animals and how they are both like and unlike you, which is important to think about to expand your understanding of the universe
Fitting a creature to a flat framework for your own comfort or internal resolution is a disrespect to the creature. Certainly with sharks, everyone should know the facts about them rather than sensationalistic misinformation—shark attacks are rare, humans are not a preferred food for sharks, and most shark bites are exploratory investigations of a strange object or animal rather than feeding upon a selected prey item, however this doesn't mean sharks are "good" by human standards and it certainly doesn't mean sharks are "safe."
Seeing a video of an enormous Great White swimming placidly I feel that her presence is not just breathtakingly beautiful, but awesome—in the more archaic sense of something that inspires awe, something so great and powerful it could destroy your fragile human life without malicious intent. Likewise with any shark, it is respectful to recognize that they can be dangerous, it is disrespectful to think of them as ocean puppies and try to touch them and grab them.
Fear, disgust, anger—each is an instinct that functions to protect you and is reactive towards potential or perceived threats. Your brain allows you to evaluate things that cause these responses and choose how to act.
All parts of this whole are important because the natural world contains actual threats but knowledge and intentional behavior are important to protecting yourself.
For example, once when I found a tick crawling on my clothing, I felt disgusted and startled, which is appropriate, but my instinctive reaction was to immediately flick the tick off, flinging it onto the floor or furniture nearby where I no longer knew where it was. In this way my response didn't actually protect me but instead increased the level of risk
There are plenty of other examples—if someone sees a venomous snake they might think it is important to kill it, but trying to kill the snake is much more dangerous than leaving it alone, since the snake will try to defend itself. Spraying pesticides to kill bugs can unbalance the ecosystem causing more harmful pests than you started with because the natural predators are also killed. Using poisons to kill mice and rats will also poison their natural predators. Killing coyotes just causes them to disperse and reproduce at a higher rate, and killing wolves causes overpopulation of prey, which causes disease to proliferate and forests to be stripped bare of saplings that could grow up and regenerate the forest...
...And it also works the opposite way with human responses of affection, love and sociability: humans often may feel that they want to make an animal their friend, but often it would be cruel to take that animal into a human house and treat it as a pet. White-tailed deer may seem cute and sympathetic but hunting some of them is important for the health of the ecosystem, and trying to make them tame puts the deer and the humans in danger. Domestic cats are our friends but they are also invasive species in much of the world, destroying populations of birds, mammals and amphibians.
Domestic cats aren't serial killers or murderers either, they are just predatory animals that instinctively hunt and kill prey.
It is hard for facts about animals to be propagated while those facts must be presented as reasons the animal deserves to live or deserves to die. Virginia opossums are important to their ecosystem and deserve to exist. They also don't actually eat ticks, that came from a very flawed and sloppy scientific study that was contradicted by later studies, and sadly the reason this misinformation got so far is that it was "proof" that opossums are valuable and shouldn't be killed for no reason.
Wolves are keystone species and vital to their ecosystems, but it's not true that they never attack humans, there have been a small handful of wolf attacks on humans, it's very few and wolves generally avoid humans but they're not "safe." They shouldn't have to be "safe" to deserve to live.
Fact is, most animals can harm a human if they feel threatened or end up in an unlucky situation! Most animals can spread disease one way or another! We have to live with this, we have to learn and use strategies to keep ourselves safe, we can't just sterilize the world of animals because of a possibility that an animal could hurt someone, any more than we can cut down every tree because trees fall on people sometimes.
No one likes hearing that there's no way to for-sure eliminate all possibility of ticks from your yard, you just have to take precautions against them, but it's true! Just like there's an inherent possibility a wasp could sting you, an inherent possibility a snake could bite you, an inherent possibility a mountain lion could eat your livestock, but you can dramatically lower your risk of these things by knowing how to coexist with these animals.
1K notes · View notes
roosterforme · 3 months ago
Text
Yours Truly, Bradley Bradshaw Part 18 | Rooster x Reader
Summary: Short notice before the start of a deployment was bad enough, but Bradley was left worrying about so much more. And if he didn't figure it out quickly, he thought he might lose you. How would you and he make it through the worst kind of time apart?
Warnings: Fluff, oral sex, smut, angst, adult banter, desperate Bradley, 18+
Length: 4100 words
Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Female teacher!Reader
Check out my masterlist for more! Yours Truly, Bradley Bradshaw masterlist
Tumblr media
Your boyfriend was acting strange, and now you had the distinct feeling he was lying to you. You sat on your bed after work on Friday with tears in your eyes as you tried to process the fact that you barely heard from him after you sent the topless picture the day before. Usually that kind of thing got him going in a good way, and he kept telling you he was fine, but it didn't seem that way. You just couldn't figure out what happened. 
A few minutes ago, you texted him about the plan for the weekend. You really wanted to talk to him about your upcoming winter break, too. You were supposed to be heading to his house right now, but you were having second thoughts as you read the latest message from him again.
I know we were supposed to go to Salvatore's tonight, but I think we need to talk instead. 
This sounded so bad to you. It didn't sound like he simply had a long day and just wanted to relax on the couch with you. This was something that built up over the past two days, and now you felt tears in your eyes as you scooped up your overnight bag and headed out.
"Just get it over with," you told yourself as you drove. You tried to focus on your playlist, but your mind was wandering to the plethora of reasons why I think we need to talk spelled disaster.
After you fought your way through rush hour traffic and pulled up to park in front of Bradley's house which you were supposed to move into next month, you noticed he was sitting on the porch step, waiting for you. And he didn't look very happy.
"Hi," he greeted with a poor attempt at a smile as he slowly stood and made his way over to you. He looked tall, broad and handsome in his uniform, but he didn't call you Gorgeous. 
"What's wrong?" you asked, not even bothering to get your bag out of your car before you met him halfway up his walkway. 
He pulled you in for a hug, and you could feel his lips on your ear as he lied to you again. "Nothing's wrong."
"Bradley," you said, trying to pull out of his grasp. He let you go, but now he wasn't even pretending to smile. You swallowed and whispered, "You've been acting strange since yesterday. I thought maybe work was getting to you, or that you just needed a day of quiet to yourself. But clearly this has to do with me, so just tell me what's wrong."
"It's not you," he replied instantly, taking a step closer with a pained look on his face. "God, it's absolutely not you."
When you looked at him more closely, it was obvious he was exhausted. Like maybe he hadn't even slept last night. He had dark circles under his eyes, and his shoulders were sagging forward just enough that he looked almost defeated. 
"Bradley."
He looked down at the sidewalk before meeting your eyes again. "I found out yesterday... I'm being deployed."
The wave of emotion didn't hit you as hard as it could have, because you'd given this a lot of thought, but you were still rendered speechless. You'd mentally planned for this. Deployments were a way of life for him. But the tears were back as you asked, "When?"
"Day after Christmas," he murmured miserably. "But that's not all."
Your voice wouldn't work as you looked up at him, vision blurring his handsome features into something that was almost frightening. "What?"
He paused while you swiped at your eyes, and just when you thought you were going to have to force it out of him, he said, "It's with the Atlantic Fleet. Out of Norfolk, Virginia. They... they said they want me permanently."
"No," you sobbed, realizing that your tears were starting to roll down your cheeks. Now it made perfect sense. You knew why he'd been acting so odd. "You want to break up before you leave."
"What?" Bradley replied, his voice sharp as he reached for you again. "No. No, Gorgeous. I don't."
You felt ridiculous, crying in his arms in his front yard, but all you could say was, "Then why didn't you just tell me yesterday that you're going back to Virginia?"
"Fuck," he grunted, tucking you tighter against him. "Does this mean you don't want to dump me?"
You inhaled the smell of his deodorant and jet fuel as you cried. "Why on earth would you think I'd want to dump you? I'm in love with you."
He started to back toward the front door, his hold on you never relenting as he murmured, "Now that I know you're not going to leave, let's go inside where we can talk and snuggle on the couch."
--------------------------
Bradley had been waiting on his porch step for almost an hour for you to arrive, thinking there was a real chance that you'd drive off again. He was tired and hungry, and he'd spent the last day and a half trying to figure out what was going on with his job. But more than anything, he was afraid you hadn't changed your stance on falling for a guy who lived on the opposite side of the country.
Shit. He made you cry. You were still crying as he led you over to the couch where you ended up sitting on his lap. He was trying to wipe your tears away as you just shook your head. "I'm sorry, Baby," he whispered. "I didn't mean to upset you like this."
You sucked in a few breaths before you managed to say, "Let me make sure I have this straight. You're leaving for Virginia. And you don't know when you're coming back, if at all?"
"Yeah," he whispered. There was no point in beating around the bush about it. "The deployment out of Norfolk is a done deal. Leaving on the twenty-sixth is a done deal. I'm trying my hardest to fight the rest of it."
"You can do that?" you asked, letting your forehead rest against his. 
Bradley kissed you softly. He couldn't stop himself with you this close. "I'm trying. I don't want to leave San Diego. Virginia used to feel like home, but it hasn't for a long time. Especially not since I met you. So a permanent change of station is something I will fight until they force it on me."
You kissed him this time, and he knew nowhere would feel like home without you. But he couldn't retire yet, and he didn't want to have to ask you to uproot your life for him. He just made himself dizzy, chasing his thoughts around in circles. 
"Is there anything I can do?" you asked.
He wanted to beg you to stay with him no matter what, but he couldn't do that either. "Remember when I was deployed last time and you told me you were afraid I was stationed somewhere far away from you? And how you would have to brace yourself to say goodbye instead of pursuing something?" You nodded against him, arms around his neck as he whispered, "I thought about that all night last night. About how this could be the end for us."
"Stop it," you said before pressing your lips to his. "I don't feel that way anymore at all. It wasn't even a deal breaker when I said it months ago, and I hadn't even met you in person yet. I'm not going anywhere, Bradley. We'll figure it out."
He eased himself down along the couch, keeping you firmly on top of him as he sighed in relief. Suddenly fighting for his job with the Pacific Fleet didn't seem as daunting. He had to figure it out though, because he wanted to stay here and get married. "Say my name again?" he asked, knowing exactly how much you could calm him down when he let you in.
"Bradley," you whispered, settling against his chest as he closed his eyes.
"I love you, Gorgeous."
He didn't realize exactly how tired and stressed he was until he woke up close to midnight, alone on the couch with a blanket draped over him, still wearing his uniform and boots. As soon as he opened his eyes, his head was pounding from the events of the week, but he could smell something cooking.
Bradley rolled off the couch while his stomach growled, and he made his way into the kitchen where you were wearing his sweatshirt and making a grilled cheese sandwich while you looked at your phone. "Hey," he murmured, wrapping his arms around you from behind. You quickly swiped out of the photo album and tossed your phone aside.
"I was going to wake you up soon. You have almost no food here, but you need to eat," you told him, turning to face him. He had no food, because he originally planned to take you out tonight, and now there was no point in going grocery shopping since he was leaving. Your expression was unreadable, and he didn't like that.
"What I need is to spend as much time with you as I can between now and Norfolk." Your lips curved up into a small smile. "I should have told you what was going on as soon as I found out."
You nodded. "I know we haven't been together long, but I'm taking this pretty fucking seriously, Bradley."
"Me, too," he promised. "And it's really hot when you swear." When you laughed, he felt so much better. "Listen, you're absolutely stuck with me now, okay? I'll figure this shit out, but you're stuck with me, and we're going to get married someday."
"Sounds good," you replied easily, still smiling. "But right now you need to eat."
----------------------------
You felt better with Bradley's arm around you than you had all day. You couldn't believe he'd been hanging onto your words from his last deployment. You were surprised he could still possibly think that distance would mean anything to you. Both of you agreed not to get ahead of yourselves. Uprooting your life and your career would leave you devastated, but you'd start over again for him.
"Were you just looking at the dirty picture you sent me?" Bradley asked as he bit into half of the sandwich while another one cooked.
"Yes," you whispered before nibbling on your own sandwich half.
"Shit," he mumbled, dropping his food back onto the plate where he stood in the kitchen. "I never even told you how much I loved it."
"No. You didn't."
He wiped his hands on his uniform shirt. "God, I keep fucking up. I got so sidetracked by the orders from Norfolk that I couldn't even think. I loved that photo."
You turned away to flip the second grilled cheese sandwich in the pan. "I thought you got tired of me sending them." Bradley's hand moved faster than his brain as he flicked the knob on the stove, turning it off. "Hey," you protested, turning to look at him again, but he pulled the spatula out of your hand and tossed it into the sink. "Bradley!"
He mashed his lips against yours, silencing you as his hands grabbed the backs of your thighs, pulling you closer until you were pressed tight to the front of his body. Then he let his hands slide along your bare skin from your legs, over your perfect ass, up until they were on your lower back. "I'll do better," he promised. "And right now, I want to show you how not fucking tired of you I am."
A minute later, you were on your back on the edge of his bed, legs thrown over his shoulders while he ate your pussy. Your fingers were tangled up in his hair as he knelt on the floor, and his sweatshirt was bunched up above your tits. "I will never get tired of you," he swore before licking a long stripe up to your clit. If you thought for a second that he would want to throw in the towel over long distance, he needed to make sure you understood he never would.
"Bradley," you moaned as he sucked on your clit. His insignia pins were digging into the back of your thigh, as was his name tag. He would figure this out. He would figure everything out. Leaving in a handful of days was not ideal, but as long as you still wanted him, he was all in.
"Oh my god," you whined, back arching as Bradley realized he was being a bit rougher with you than usual. But he couldn't stop. His fingers were digging into your hips, holding you in place as you tried to rock against him. 
His mouth was demanding as he sucked on and plucked at your clit, but you just kept getting louder for him. Your legs were shaking, heels digging into his shoulder blades, but he didn't stop until you came. With his tongue still swirling your clit as you yanked on his hair, Bradley quickly unzipped his khaki pants and pulled himself free. He positioned himself at your entrance as you tugged until his mouth was on yours.
"You liked it rough," he grunted between kisses slick with your arousal.
"I did," you answered, rolling your hips to take the tip of him. As your fingers trailed down to his pins, you asked, "Are you going to fuck me, Lieutenant Bradshaw?" He watched you gasp, mouth agape as he filled you with one deep thrust, and then your head tipped back as you moaned, "I'll take that as a yes."
His lips found that sweet spot next to your ear that he loved to kiss. "I just want to ensure that you'll miss me as much as I miss you while we're apart."
Your voice was softer as you said, "You don't have to worry about that."
Bradley kissed along your neck and told you how much he loved you before absolutely pounding you into the mattress. 
-----------------------------
You and Bradley slept in so late on Saturday morning, you heard him wander out to the living room when Natasha arrived to go for a run to tell her he'd workout on Sunday instead. When he tried to slip back into bed, you rolled over toward him.
"Sorry. It was just Nat. I forgot I told her days ago that we could run." He gathered you against his chest and kissed your forehead.
You grinned and said, "I heard you tell her that the love of your life was more appealing today than working out."
"I sure did," he grunted and ran his big, heavy hand down your back. "You're always more appealing than anything else, Gorgeous. But if I don't run, I'll gain so much weight. You know how much I eat."
A smile found your lips as you thought about the rough sex followed by another round of grilled cheese sandwiches at two in the morning. "Can we skip Salvatore's again tonight? I'd rather stay here and feed you. We can go to Salvatore's when your deployment ends and you return to San Diego."
Bradley sighed. "And if I get told my new station is in Norfolk?"
You pressed your fingertip to his lips. "We're not humoring that thought yet. Instead, we're going to snuggle and fuck and maybe watch a Christmas movie. Okay?"
"Nothing has ever sounded better."
After that, Sunday was spent with the two of you trying to use up as much of his food as you could. You even managed to bake some cookies that he ate a dozen of in one sitting, and then you found a strand of twinkle lights in his hallway closet where you discreetly squished a spider without telling him. You helped him hang the lights on his porch railing as he laughed and said, "I don't usually celebrate holidays anymore."
"You do now," you informed him, making a mental note to have your students make some cards for him this week before he left. Bradley would be very busy over the next few days, and you didn't want to stress him out about the holiday. But just when you were about to ask him if there was a chance he'd want to spend Christmas Day with you before he flew to Norfolk, he said, "Maybe we can get Thai food on Christmas, and you can help me finish packing?"
You nodded and tried to keep the tears at bay, afraid to admit to him that the future you were so sure of was scaring you a bit. Being without him for a deployment was manageable, but the last thing you wanted to do was move across the country. At least you'd have your regular pen pal back while he was on the aircraft carrier; having Bradley in your email inbox on a regular basis again was better than nothing.
"That sounds perfect," you told him, knowing you'd do whatever it took to make this work.
----------------------------
When Bradley was called in to talk to Cyclone, he was exhausted for a different reason. Although the weekend started out laced with uncertainty between you and him, it bloomed into something sweet. On Sunday evening, you held his hand and walked along the windswept beach until it got too chilly, and then you helped him start packing. You'd had some tears in your eyes that he brushed away as you folded his clothes into tiny rectangles and stuck by his side.
Now the only uncertainty he felt came from the U.S. fucking Navy. With a deep breath and squared shoulders, he opened Cyclone's office door after he knocked. It wasn't surprising that Mav and Warlock were there, too, but he couldn't tell if that was a good sign or a bad one regarding a change of station. He raised his hand into the proper salute.
"Admirals. Captain."
The three men returned the courtesy before Cyclone sank into his office chair. "Have a seat, Lieutenant." His voice sounded gruff and perhaps even more annoyed than usual as Bradley slowly sat down opposite him. "Captain Mitchell," he barked at Maverick who procured a folder from behind his back and handed it to Bradley. Then he turned toward Bradley again and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Lieutenant Bradshaw, you'll report to the USS Gerald R. Ford in a matter of days to rendezvous with the air strike team."
Bradley nodded and skimmed the paperwork inside the folder regarding the sensitive nature of the mission, but he didn't much care about what they wanted him to do when he got there. "Sir, can you tell me where I'll be stationed once this mission is completed?"
Cyclone leaned back in his seat, brow puckered, arms crossed over his chest. "Naval Station Norfolk has, as you know, requested you specifically to round out their Super Hornet team permanently."
"Yes, Sir," Bradley replied, practically choking on the words. He would have never thought the promise of Virginia would feel like a threat to his happiness, but here he was. "I would really prefer to stay in San Diego," he added, trying to keep the pleading tone out of his voice.
Cyclone leaned forward in his seat with a weary sigh. "Admiral Simpson, Captain Mitchell and myself all agree that the Pacific Fleet is very well balanced at the moment. Losing a reliable pilot to the Atlantic at this point would not be ideal." The tension in Bradley's body eased up momentarily before Cyclone said, "But I can only do so much to keep the status quo when there is a clear need across the board."
Bradley wanted to ask why nobody else was even in consideration when Warlock cleared his throat and said, "There's a price to pay when you're the best of the best."
There was a beat of silent agreement amongst the four of them before Cyclone heaved a deep breath. "I'll do what I can," he said simply. "In the meantime, prepare for your flight to Norfolk. The information is in the folder. And prepare to be out of communication with any and all civilians for the duration."
Bradley's heart stopped. He opened the folder again, but his eyes couldn't seem to focus on the words in front of him as the pages all blurred together. His fingers scrambled as he swallowed hard, and finally he looked up at the older man seated behind the desk. "No communication at all. For the duration?"
Cyclone nodded once. "You are dismissed, Lieutenant."
---------------------------
It was just something silly, but when you saw it while you were out shopping, you bought Bradley another Christmas present. You wrapped it up in red and gold paper along with the Mira Mesa Elementary School sweatshirt you got in his size. Then you threw the gifts along with the collection of cards from your students in your overnight bag and tried to keep yourself calm as you drove down to Coronado.
You would have a few days with your boyfriend at the beginning of your winter break before you took him to the airport and sent him off to Norfolk. There would be plenty of things to keep you busy while he was away, including packing up your apartment before your lease ended. But now you'd be moving into his house without him there.
All of the twinkle lights and decorated trees gave you a bittersweet feeling in the pit of your stomach as you drove down his street, but at least this time when you parked, he jumped up from his porch step and met you at your car.
"Gorgeous," he breathed, wrapping his arms around you. His old sweatshirt was currently keeping you warm, and you really wanted him to have his new one for his deployment. You kissed him hard, noting the look of apprehension on his face, but chalking it up to the stress of the unknown.
You kissed him again and kept your arms around his neck as he picked up your bag. "I was going to say we should wait until Christmas morning, but I want you to open your presents now."
His voice was deep and raspy and right next to your ear as he led you inside. "You did not have to get me anything." He kissed your cheek and added, "I need to tell you something important."
"After you open these," you agreed, reaching into the bag and pulling out both gifts before he set it down.
Bradley studied your face before running his thumb along your cheek. "Sure. After I open these."
He took the wrapped packages as you tugged him toward the couch with your hands on his bicep, and you ended up halfway on his lap as he carefully tore at the paper like he didn't want to harm it too much.
"Just rip it," you said with a soft laugh, but he shook his head and looked up at you.
"It's too pretty," he replied. "And nobody gets me gifts, ever. Unless you count coupons for steak dinners from Natasha."
You laughed a little louder as you imagined the laundry list of weird gifts his best friend must have given him over the years. When he finally had his hands on the sweatshirt, he sat frozen with a smile on his face. "I love this. I kind of feel like an honorary faculty member at your school."
"You're a legend in my classroom, Bradley," you promised, snuggling a little closer as he set the shirt aside and carefully unwrapped the second item. This one would mean more to you while he was away, and you hoped he understood just how much you were going to miss his voice and his touch. But you'd still have something from your pen pal.
"Oh," Bradley said softly as he held the navy blue stationery set on his lap. It included note cards, luxuriously thick paper and a gold pen. You could already picture his handwriting on the pages.
"We can go back to being pen pals for a bit," you whispered. "I'll be refreshing my email inbox and waiting not so patiently for my mail to arrive. It'll be great. That's how I fell in love with you in the first place."
"Gorgeous," he groaned, setting the stationery down on his coffee table before burying his face in his hands. "That's not gonna happen."
------------------------------
Atlantic Fleet, here we come. But for how long? No pen pals. No email. No letters. This deployment already hurts. Thanks @beyondthesefourwalls
PART 19
@hotch-meeeeeuppppp
@chassy21
@solacestyles
@daisyhollyxox
@blog-name6996
@bcon24
@avada-kedavra-bitch-187
@katiebby04
@marantha
@averyhotchner
@abaker74
@heli991113
@k-k0129
@noz4a2
@shanimallina87
@little-wiseone
@ccbb2222
@xoxabs88xox
@thedroneranger
@cherrycola27
@fanboyswhore9
@xomrsalliej4787xo
@desert-fern
@horseslovers2016
@mattyskies
@hookslove1592
@blahehblah
@sadpetalsstuff
@local-spidey
@schoollover
@lex-winchester
@magicalmorg
@nicole01-23
@jessicab1991
@happyrebelruins
@samsgoddess
@ughthisisntright
@bellaireland1981
@sagittarius-flowerchild
@mygyn
@yuckosworld
@daggerspare-standingby
@nessjo
@trickphotography2
@lyn-js
@marve2014
@furiousladyking
@godsfavoritebabe
714 notes · View notes
acewithapaintbrush · 22 days ago
Text
Saw @artsymeeshee hospital sketches of the sea grunks and thought to myself, is this finally my time to write some brotherly angst for these two? The answer is yes. Short but sweet, please enjoy.
******************************
The first thing Stan becomes aware of is the noise.
A constant beeping right next to his ear. Loud and high-pitched and repetitive and unfortunately very familiar to an old grifter with bad luck like him. He would be a lot more annoyed with this sound if his last clear memory wasn't of roaring waters rushing past his ears, stealing his hearing and leaving nothing but white noise behind.
He'd rather take the beeping.
Next comes taste, which, ugh! He could have gone without that! The feel of scratchy sheets is not much better but it tells him that he is in one of the better hospitals. Believe it or not, the better the hospital, the scratchier the sheets. Ford should cool it with the mystical beasts and research what's up with that!
Speaking of Ford.
Stan keeps his breathing even as he slowly opens his eyes. The light has been dimmed in anticipation and he blinks a couple times at a ceiling that is painted a nondescript beige color. He looks at it for a moment and for some strange reason he suddenly feels a fierce urge to video call Mabel.
But first things first.
Stan slowly turns his head to the side which actually hurts. Don't they have him on the good stuff?
Just as he expected, there is his brother. Ford has squeezed himself into the same bed as Stan, facing his brother's prone form. Stan can't help but smile. His brother must have bullied the nurses into letting him stay. The bed is way too small for two grown men but somehow the genius has managed to practically fold himself into a compact ball, leaving enough room for all those fancy machines connected to the patient. One of his hands lightly rests against Stan's chest which he hasn't even noticed until now.
Ford's eyes are closed but he is mumbling under his breath, reciting one of his journal entries from memory.
Stan winces. His brother must be really rattled by this little mishap.
‘Great job giving the guy another thing to worry about, Stanley!’
“I think climbing into the hospital bed with the patient is against the rules, Sixer? You are not supposed to do that.”
He was going for levity and humor but his hoarse voice kinda ruins that.
Ford's eyes don't snap open. He doesn't gasp or jerk upright or anything like that. Instead he takes a shuddering breath and deliberately opens his eyes. They find Stanley immediately and there is not a hint of surprise in them. Stan wonders how long Ford has known that he's awake.
“Same to you,” Ford says and his voice is so flat it causes a shiver to run down Stan's spine.
“Hey, s’not like I planned for this to happen.”
“I would be very cross with you if you had planned falling overboard, Stanley.”
Ford's emotions still feel weirdly flat. He isn't even lecturing and scolding Stan for his reckless behavior, just presses his six-fingered hand against his chest and stares at him with those blank eyes.
“I'm alright.” Stan shifts so he can face his brother and, damn, those ribs are definitely cracked. He briefly wonders if that happened in the fall or whether someone had to do CPR on him and quickly decides that maybe he doesn't want to know. Close call. Much too close. “I'm alright, Ford,” he repeats as if that makes it true.
For the first time an emotion flickers through Ford's face. He narrows his eyes and for a moment Stan thinks he's angry but then a single tear runs down an unshaven cheek, immediately seeping into the pillow.
“I thought I lost you for good,” Ford whispers, voice tortured. “I couldn't find you. For the longest time. I looked and I looked and you were just… gone. I couldn't find you!”
‘Same to you,’ Stan echoes with a bit of a bitter edge, mind replaying thirty years of hunching down in a dusty basement in a matter of seconds.
But this is not about him and Stan is, no matter what some might want to tell you, not an insensitive asshole.
“You did find me,” he says. He doesn't actually know if that's true. The time after he fell into the ocean during that storm is still a bit of a mystery to him. All he remembers is the noise of the water and how cold he felt and a voice screaming his name, over and over, growing fainter with each wave crashing over his head.
But Ford needs some reassurance right now. And the best way to reassure Ford that Stan is alright is by proving his alrightness with a good, old Pines hug.
He lightly pulls at the hand on his chest and with a cut off gasp Ford immediately obliges, scooting closer until they are entwined with one another just like they were as kids when the nightmares became too much to remain separated by a bunk bed.
“You found me.” Stan repeats and ignores the tears soaking into his hospital gown.
‘That's what we do,’ he thinks with a content smile, eyes falling shut with exhaustion. ‘We always find each other again.’
560 notes · View notes
dcxdpdabbles · 8 months ago
Note
Heya! I love your works! You always manage to turn tropes on their heads and make them anew! I was wondering, are you going to continue The Audit? I loved the dynamics of the Bats interacting with Danny, and Damian and Danny's relationship was downright delightful!
Damian rarely got nervous because of the tension in the room. It wasn't in his nature, having been born with Father's ability to keep a cool head.
But watching the stare-down between his Father and Uncle Daniel was very nerve-wracking. He was still determining who was winning at this point. Father had retreated fully into Batman, locking away all and any emotions behind his persona, which was bizarre to see on his maskless face.
Meanwhile, Uncle Daniel's emotions are displayed for the world to see in the heavy set of his jaw, the down pull of his lips, and the ice in his gaze.
Between the two men sat a pile of paper with various red markings. Damian hadn't gotten the chance to review the documents, but he knew there was a lot, and most of it had not been good. He likely failed the audit.
His uncle had stayed at Wayne Manor for three days, despite the many attempts by the Bats besides Damian to get him out. He had been silently observing everything that happened within the manor's walls. Uncle Daniel took his position as an observer in the literal sense.
He did not speak or interact with anyone besides Damian and often ended up scaring his adoptive siblings since they didn't notice him in the room. Damian personally thinks it was their own fault for being frightened. Obviously, they needed more training if they were unable to detect his uncle.
It's not like the man was hiding; he is good at entering rooms as silent as a ghost. Damian knew all other league-raised children could sense when Uncle Daniel was about, so really, people trained by Batman should have caught him miles away.
Todd and Cain were an honest disgrace for failing to notice Uncle Daniel until his pen clicked to write down what he observed. Damian attempted to improve things by presenting the best of Wayne Manor, but he knew the more he tried, the more Uncle Daniel used the red pen.
He only thought he did well on the audit by showing off his various animal friends. Uncle Daniel seemed very taken with Batcow the most, and after helping Damian milk her, he had finally switched the color on his multi-pen to green.
"I will not repeat myself again, Mr. Wayne," Uncle Daniel hissed, snapping Damian from his thoughts. Father's eyes narrowed.
"You deemed me unfit for my son."
"I deem you unfit for all your children."
Father's face remained impassive, but Damian knew him well enough to see the displeasure rolling off his body in waves. "I try my best for my children."
"Not nearly enough." Uncle Daniel reached for the papers, flipping through the handwritten notes to a page, taking on three lines. When Damian leaned over to read, Uncle Daniel's hand shot out and he pushed his head away.
"No, Little One. These are your sibling's personal files. You can not read them." It's mostly because he respects his uncle greatly that he did not throw a fit for being excluded from the conversation. And the fact that his uncle switched over to their native tongue.
It had been startling to realize how much he missed hearing his language. And how warm it made him feel to use it here in Gotham.
Father pulled the paperwork to him. His blue eyes rapidly moved over the words before he flipped to the next page, the next, and the next. Each time, his actions became more frantic until he reached the end.
Then he just stared at the audit his uncle had written with a strange blank look in his eyes. Damian felt very unnerved.
"Damian, go wait in your room," Father said softly, gaze still not lifting from the report.
"What? Father-"
"Now, Damian."
The boy turned to his uncle for help, but the other man merely smiled. "It's alright, Little One. Your father and I will settle this."
It was ludicrous to remove him from the room to discuss his future. Still, Damian knew he would not be able to convince the two most important men in his life of this, and while Uncle Daniel was a pacifist, it didn't mean he was weak in any way.
He would have Damian removed, and walking out with dignity was better. The young ninja huffed, strutting out of the room, down the hall, and up the main stairway to his bedroom. He ignored the various Wayne-adopted dolts that were trying to eavesdrop on the conversation.
None of them had learned that if Uncle Daniel did not want anyone hearing his conversations, then no one would hear a thing. This was one of the many mysteries surrounding Uncle Daniel.
No one in the current League of Assiaians knew much about the First Son, mainly because no one had lived as long as he and Grandfather, but they all knew he had extraordinary powers.
Drake is a fool who thinks he can record all of Uncle's abilities when he hasn't even scraped the suffering of everything Uncle Daniel could do.
And he never will. A nasty voice whispers in his mind. Damian opens his bedroom door, taking one final look around, trying to fight off the wave of sadness. He can not say his stay here had been easy, but he had grown attached to his life at Wayne Manor.
It's a foolish attachment. It didn't matter.
He had failed the audit, and Uncle Daniel would have him moved. Damian's eyes burned slightly, making him blink rapidly as he began packing his room.
He had been able to adjust to the sudden move from the league to Gotham; Damian could do it again. He was halfway done getting everything of value stored in his suitcases when his Father appeared at his door.
"Damian? What are you doing?" The man's voice sounds crushed, and Damian refuses to meet his gaze. He needs to leave through the Wayne Manor doors with his dignity.
"I am sure it's quite clear what I am doing, Father." He says, folding his shirts in the military style Pennyworth had shown him. It saved the most space, and the idea that he will never learn more little tricks from the age bullet makes the burn in his eyes stronger.
A few traitorous tears fall, landing on his blue-gry shirt and turning a few spots into a dark blue.
"I won't let him take you," Father promises, strutting towards Damian and hugging him. The child stiffens at once before more tears silently fall down his face.
"You can not stop Uncle. He can take all of us away."
"I know," Father admits. "That's why I have agreed to his terms."
"Terms?"
"Mr. Wayne and I have agreed on a trial period. He will go to therapy to improve his behavior and communication skills with his children. I will be living here and monitoring the progress. It will be one year." Uncle Daniel says suddenly, right next to their hug, his cold arms warping around Damian and overlapping Father's.
Father's face was spammed at the contact, but Damian had never felt so warm or protected.
He sinks into the hug, watching Uncle Daniel's warm, soft gaze stare down at him. Then, his gaze hardens into disgust as Father leans on Damian's hair. Uncle Daniel quickly leans onto the other side of Damian's skull, trying to comfort him.
Relief crashes into Damian. The audit was not over; he still had a year to prove to Uncle that he should live here with Father. He will not be moved.
But it will take a miracle for his father to change that drastically. His uncle would remove him unless Damian could show him that there was something here worth staying for.
He needed a plan, a goal, an appeal to Uncle Daniel's more gentle, idealistic views. But what? He could try to become more brotherly with his adoptive siblings. That could buy him a few more months.
I need something more. Something more binding. Damian thinks, pressing his face into the two men's arms. He does not need comfort like a child, but being held like this is.... pleasant.
"Oh! Family Group Hug!" Richard screams from the hallway before the man is sprinting into the room. Father makes a face but Uncle Daniel opens the hug, leaving a gap for Richard.
The man barrels in with a shout of glee, squeezing the three almost desperately. Damian would make a face, but he understands just how great Uncle Daniel's hugs can be, and added to the fact Father is not one to show displays of affection, this is Richard's best chance to-.
Wait.
That's it! Uncle's one weakness is being there for children who need him. Damian realizes, a plan forming in his mind, as Brown, Drake, and Cain run into the room. They pause at the sight before all three are invited into Uncle's hug. Brown leaps in for her hug, and Cain hesitantly approaches while Drake stays safely away, eyeing the group with distaste.
Uncle Daniel locks eyes with the teenager by the door, offering a sad smile, and Damian can see that he genuinely wants Drake in this hug but will not force him.
He respects Drake's boundaries because, to Uncle Daniel, adoption means family. He considers Drake to be Damian's brother, so he would treat him with the same care and love as he does for Damian.
Usually, that would bother him greatly, but Damian is too proud of himself for thinking of such a great plan.
There was no way Father would change enough in one year to satisfy Uncle into thinking he was a good fit for raising children. That's fine.
All Damian had to do in that year was convince Uncle to stay at Wayne Manor to do the child-raising himself. This way Damian could remain in Gotham, no matter the audit's results.
How does one trap a man in child-raising when none of the children are his biological? Simple. They get them married to someone with children, and Father just so happens to be without a paramour.
Damian has to get two men to fall in love in one year. It should be simple. With Uncle Daniel's protective core and Father's determination to save Gotham, there may be enough common ground between them to spark romance!
"I love you guys!" Richard crows, squeezing everyone he can reach.
"Hn," Father grunts, while Brown and Cain both inform Richard they care for him as well. Damian softly mutters, "I care for you too," which is much better than Father's.
Uncle's snaps.
"Your son said he loves you, but you don't even respond? You are a brute, Mr. Wayne."
"And you are a leech." Father hisses.
Damian winces. This will take a lot of work. Good thing he's never cowered from a challenge.
1K notes · View notes
moonylvs · 16 days ago
Text
⋆˙⟡ The prophecy
Tumblr media
Summary: Your whole life of being ignored in love makes you believe that love will never come for you, so seeing James start dating the only person you thought loved you is too much for you. 'Let it once be me' Pairing: Jegulus x fem!reader Words: 4600 Warnings: Reader is an insecure nerd with a lack of love (she's also oblivious), mentions of crying and self-hatred, use of yn one time, hurt/confort, a bit of angst if you close one eye, slightly suggestive (Nothing explicit), a lot of fluff <3 Let me know if I miss anything!
Tumblr media
Since you were little you could not help but feel forgotten, of course there were people who loved you, you were not a complete loser, you had a few friends and had no problems with anyone in your class, but still that painful feeling was still there, your friends had more friends, more friends to spend time with when you were not there, but you did not have so many people to hang out with.
Regulus was the only friend you were really close to, the only one who hadn't moved away over the years, Regulus had more friends, such as Barty or Evan, but he always showed you that you were his priority, including you in all the plans he made, listening to you attentively and never leaving you alone, the boy wasn't good at expressing his emotions, but it was the little details that made you feel his appreciation for you.
Over the years you and Regulus had become too close, you practically lived in his room, where he could listen to you for hours talking about the same subject no matter how much you rambled, it wasn't always like that, sometimes it was quiet evenings where you were both silently reading, just enjoying each other's presence.
Anyone who knew Regulus knew you and vice versa, you spent most of your time together, occasionally being accompanied by Barty or Dorcas.
With anyone else you couldn't help but feel like a lapdog, chasing people and seeking their attention, with Regulus none of this happened, there was no awkwardness or anxiety, just tranquility and affection.
But as always, the universe seemed to want to test you, every year a misfortune happened in your life, this year the misfortune was called James Potter and it was a cute quidditch player with glasses.
At first you didn’t care, you and regulus were assigned together to a school job with James, nothing out of the ordinary, regulus seemed somewhat irritated by the idea of working with one of Sirius' friends but said he wouldn’t give it any importance.
The assignment was not particularly easy, it was hours in the library and you had to admit that working with James wasn’t the easiest thing in the world, but time seemed to pass quickly when the three of you were together.
Everything seemed relatively normal to you, you didn’t even care that James and Regulus seemed to get along, it was all too subtle, started with Regulus going to the library first, spending time alone with James and discussing assignment issues without you, then James started visiting more often the black lake, where you and regulus spent time together, but after that Regulus started going to the library without you, you used to find James chatting with regulus in the halls.
You wanted to think it was nothing, regulus still your best friend, still paying attention and even remembered your favorite chocolate, which he made sure to give you whenever he felt something was wrong.
You wanted to convince yourself that nothing was wrong, but there was a strange feeling in your chest, a little voice in your head telling you that something was wrong.
But how could this be wrong? James was sweet and attentive, he was the most popular boy at Hogwarts, he made Regulus smile, which no one else but you did, he even talked to you, included you in his plans and talked to you, listening carefully to what you said.
Even if you tried to hate James you couldn't, the boy was a gentleman in every sense of the word, but you thought it was his nature, you didn't think you were special, so you let James carry your books, walk you to class and even went to the three brooms with Regulus, for you it was nothing out of this world, but in spite of everything that horrible feeling wouldn't go away from you, that feeling that everything was going to end badly.
You really wanted to like him, there was nothing wrong with James, maybe it was you that was wrong...
Tumblr media
“I didn't think you even knew anything about poetry” you could recognize Regulus' voice as he turned in one of the corridors, which surprised you, you hadn't seen him all morning, which was strange since you used to have breakfast together on weekends.
“Oh hi dove” James' voice snapped you out of your thoughts, you hadn't even noticed that you almost bumped into them.
James had a habit of calling everyone by nicknames, from “dove” to “sweetheart”, so you had understood that it didn't mean anything, but a strange feeling settled in your stomach every time he did.
“Hi, where were you?” You asked both of them, although your gaze was fixed on Regulus, your voice was calm but had some concern in it, had they gone out alone?
“We went to hogsmaede, for the poetry books I told you about” Regulus said calmly, but you felt a pang in your chest, you were the one who had told Regulus about those new books in the bookstore, you had agreed that you would go together for it.
“I thought we were going together after dinner” You said somewhat confused, but it was obvious that you were feeling a little bad about this.
“Ah it's just that I told James and he offered to go with me, you seemed busy with your Herbology homework, I didn't want to bother you” Regulus explained without giving it any importance, he really believed that you didn't care, you had gone a million times together to Hogsmaede and he had seen you a little off these last days, so he didn't want to bother you or force you to go out, he knew you were not the most social person.
But he didn't know that you didn't care, that you would always go out with him if he asked you to, of course, you weren't a fan of socializing or going to places with a lot of people, but you didn't care if it meant going with him.
“Oh okay, sure…” You said trying to sound as calm and disinterested as possible, maybe it was ridiculous, you were just overreacting, right? Regulus could go out with whoever he wanted, it didn't matter, but why did it hurt so much?
“We can go again later if you want, Marlene said there is a new coffee shop next to honeydukes” James said almost instantly, he seemed to have noticed the way your mood had changed.
“Oh no, Regulus was right, I have to finish my herbology homework…I'll see you guys later” You said with disinterest, though you couldn't even look them in the eyes, you felt a lump in your throat forming, a whirlwind of emotions flooding you, but you didn't want to make a spectacle of yourself there, it would be ridiculous, so you didn't let them say another word and hurried off to your room, feeling a pressure in your chest grow and the tears stinging in your eyes.
You wanted to stop the tears but you couldn't, it had all become too much at that moment, so all you could do was lock yourself in the bathroom of your room, sitting next to the bathtub and bringing your legs to your chest as the tears rolled down your cheeks.
You felt ridiculous, crying over two boys you didn't even have anything with, that was the problem, you had nothing, you never had anything, at the beginning it was a joke between you and Regulus, saying you were both losers with no love life, but now there was only you, Regulus had James, the most damn beautiful and attentive boy at Hogwarts, and where were you?
You didn't know what it was that feeling that came over you, some kind of envy or… jealousy?
You had seen the way James looked at Regulus, with stars in his eyes, you wanted that, you wanted someone to love like you were the air he breathed, you wanted to be able to intertwine your hands with Regulus' like James did, you wanted to snuggle between the two of them and wake up knowing you had someone who cared about you.
But you knew it wasn't possible, you knew it since you were a little girl, when all your friends ended up moving away, when everyone started to have their first kiss and you hadn't even held hands romantically with someone, you just wanted it to be you for once.
A knock on the door made you jump in place, at first you thought it was just one of your roommates, but a voice proved otherwise.
“Is everything okay in there, love?” at that moment you couldn't hate regulus' nicknames any more, you didn't want to see him at that moment, to anyone.
“Yeah, I'm fine” You said trying to sound calm, wiping the tears coming out of your eyes with the sleeves of your sweater.
“Can we come in?” your brow furrowed slightly at his words, We? but as if Regulus had read your mind, he spoke again. “James is here too, you didn't look so good earlier.”
You wanted to curse, what the fuck did James have to do there? You didn't want to be seen like that, you didn't want anyone to see you like that, but there was another feeling in your chest, you wanted to be comforted, you wanted someone to tell you that everything would be alright.
So before Regulus could say anything else, you walked up to the door and unlocked it, opening it slightly before stepping away, letting them in.
James and Regulus felt their chests heave at the sight of you, your eyes puffy and reddish, traces of tears on your cheeks and your eyes burning bright with tears.
Your gaze went to your hands, playing with the hem of your sweater, you didn't have the courage to look at them, you felt ridiculous, dramatic, like a little girl.
James was the first to approach, the brown-haired man was about to take you in his arms, wanting to protect you from everything, but for a moment he remembered that you and he were not as close as he would like, and he had seen you pull away a million times when someone tried to hug you.
“What's the wrong, dove?” asked James worriedly, holding back the urge to stretch his arms toward you.
Your chest tightened as you listened to him, why did he have to use those nicknames? Why did he have to be so nice?
“It's nothing, it was just a b-bad day I guess” You said trying to sound disinterested, but the slight cut in your voice gave away that something was wrong.
“This isn't just a bad day, yn, you've been acting weird all week, even with me” Now the one who spoke was Regulus, his voice sounding a little hurt, it was true, you had been pushing Regulus away for the last week, something you had never done before, the boy had been there for you all your life, you would never want to push him away, but this last week it had all become too much, your thoughts were overwhelming you, making you miserable and you didn't want Regulus to deal with you and your problems, you couldn't be a burden, to him or anyone else.
Your gaze lifted slightly, looking at Regulus and James for a moment, you felt your eyes fill with tears almost instantly, Regulus was wearing James' sweater, you didn't know if you hadn't noticed it before or if he had just put it on, but either way it hurt, it made your chest tighten.
Your mind went back to the last few weeks, remembering all the interactions between James and Regulus, the way they both looked at each other and laughed, the hickeys you had tried to ignore on Regulus' neck, the times you accidentally caught them in the hallways in a sweet kissing session, all those memories invaded your mind at once and made you feel miserable, because you were losing the only person you had ever loved, because it wasn't you who they loved, because it was never you who was loved.
Tears came out of your eyes non-stop, making you sob like never before, you felt like a little girl, weak and alone, wishing someone would hold you and tell you that everything would be all right.
Regulus soon came closer, wrapping you in his arms as if he was afraid you were going to fall apart right there, you wanted to cry harder, you felt ridiculous, you would have wanted to walk away, to disappear, but at that moment everything became too much and you could only sink into Regulus' arms, wishing your misery would end.
Regulus felt his chest tighten at seeing you so heartbroken, you had been holding it all in for so long that now you felt as if your own feelings were suffocating you, Regulus felt his own eyes fill with tears at the sight of you, feeling terrible for letting you get to this point, for not having cared sooner at seeing you so distant, a pang of guilt appeared in his chest.
James next to you wasn't much better, his face was one of genuine concern, he didn't know what to do, he didn't know you well enough to know what to do, he was afraid of getting so close to you that you would push him away.
“Love, please tell me what's wrong, it hurts me to see you like this” Regulus murmured, lightly stroking your hair, you sank deeper into his arms, wishing for it to be over, for the pain to disappear once and for all.
“I-I am what is wrong, it's a-always me…” You said between sobs, your head was starting to hurt from crying, you felt like you couldn't breathe.
“Dove, there's nothing wrong with you-” James started to say, trying to get closer to you, but you didn't even let him finish, feeling the pain cloud your t,thoughts.
“You don't know anything! Y-You would never understand…” You said painfully, pulling away from Regulus' arms, feeling your own chest tighten, to you James was the perfect boy, who had all of Hogwarts behind him, he would never understand your pain, no one would.
“Let us try, let us try to understand you” Regulus said quietly, trying to get closer to you again.
Your eyes filled with tears again, you felt a pressure in your chest suffocating you, you instantly shook your head, they were not going to understand you, they couldn't, not even you could, at some point they would notice how complicated you were and they would walk away, they couldn't fix you.
“I don't want to be understood, I don't want to be fixed, I don't-” You said in a clipped voice, tears kept coming out of your eyes, blurring your vision, you didn't even notice when James and Regulus had come so close to you.
“There's nothing to fix about you, love, you're not broken or damaged” James said softly, bringing his hand tentatively to your cheek, wondering if you would pull away or not.
But you didn't, you let James reach his hand up and gently touch your cheek, wiping away the tears that came from your eyes, his hand was warm and gentle on your cheek, you couldn't help but soften at his touch, it felt so good.
“I just want to be loved, is that so hard?” You said in barely a whisper, you sounded so vunerable, both boys felt their chests squeeze at hearing you, there was no way you were hard to love, not for them.
“Not at all, we've loved you from the first moment you appeared in our lives” Regulus said warmly, moving closer to you and James, tucking a lock of hair behind your ear.
You felt your breath catch when you heard his words, he didn't mean it, you were misinterpreting things, there was no way…
“You dont mean that, regulus, you dont-” You started to say instantly, pulling away from the touch of both of them defensively, you couldn't believe an illusion, you couldn't deal with the pain of losing them both.
“I don't what?” Regulus interrupted you, not letting you move too far away before gently grabbing one of your wrists. “I don't love you? You're not one to say what I feel or don't feel, I love you, and so does James” Regulus said seriously, not a trace of doubt in his voice.
You felt your breath catch, there was no way, it must have all been a dream, but you could feel Regulus' hand on your wrist, holding you gently, showing you that it was real, this was real.
“I don't know why you seem so surprised, dove, I know Regulus isn't very expressive but I thought we had been too obvious with our feelings for you” James said with obviousness, giving you a small smile, showing you that his words were true.
Your mind seemed to click, the memories of the last few weeks coming back to you, you had spent the last few weeks together with both boys and you had to admit that Regulus was a little more clingy with you than usual, he had looked at you more than usual while you were studying and you even remembered him playing with the bracelets in your hands, but you couldn't believe there were any other feelings with his looks or touches, he was your best friend and you had been so focused on his interactions with James that you hadn't even noticed how he acted with you.
With James the memories made you blush, now it all seemed a little more obvious, James was much more affectionate than Regulus, putting his arm around your shoulder as you walked, or telling you how good your hair looked with waves.
At that moment you couldn't help but shrink in place, feeling embarrassed, had they really been so obvious and you hadn't noticed?
“You really didn't notice anything?” Regulus asked incredulously, though something in his chest ached, you really didn't think they could be in love you?
“I, I d-didn't think…” The words didn't come out of your mouth, you felt embarrassed and a bit stupid, you wanted to believe their words but something in you still felt that it was all a bad joke, how could they notice you?
James noticed how your mind seemed to go too fast, overwhelming you with thoughts and ideas that weren't even true, so without thinking he approached you, taking your cheek again.
“We really like you, both of us, we love listening to you talk for hours about your books and hearing you laugh, I love when you insult me because I don't keep quiet in the library, I love how you and Regulus seem to get lost in your own world when you're together, I love how smart and kind you are, I love you, all of you.” James said sincerely, looking at you with those sparkling eyes that left you in no doubt that what he said was true.
You felt a new warmth in your chest, something you hadn't felt before, and it felt so…. nice
“I know that maybe now everything is too much and we'll go slow if that's the way you want it, we care about you, more than anything in this world, and I know that sometimes I'm an idiot who doesn't know what he wants, but if there's one thing I'm sure of is that I love you, and nothing will change my feelings for you” Regulus said, his cheeks were slightly flushed, you knew how hard it was for him to express himself, so every word meant too much to you.
Your mind was still thinking too much, a thousand ideas and emotions running through your mind, so many that they could overwhelm you, but for a moment a new feeling appeared in you and silenced everything else, it was love.
Your mind went blank, all the fear disappeared when you saw their looks, they were genuine, so for the first time you decided to believe, you decided that maybe this was for the best, you deserved it, for once, for the first time, it was you.
You were loved.
“I love you too” You mumbled in barely a whisper looking at both boys “I'm sorry for…for how I acted… I thought you guys were leaving me out and I-” You started to explain, feeling your chest hurt as you remembered how you yelled at James and walked away from Regulus, but they didn't let the pain last too long.
“It's okay dove, we didn't know you felt this way, we should have been more direct with you” James murmured warmly, with that tone that made you feel so safe.
“James is right, it was me who wanted to give you space when I saw you a bit discouraged, I should have asked what was wrong, I'm sorry, love” Regulus added with some pain in his voice, to which you immediately shook your head.
“No, no, it's not your fault, I preferred to isolate myself than to talk to you…I always do” You said without looking at them, the last thing in just a whisper, isolating yourself was something you couldn't avoid, you preferred to sink in your pain and misery than to let others carry it.
“You don't have to keep doing it, we're here and we're not leaving” Regulus said sweetly, taking your chin and lifting your gaze, “If you want space just tell us and we'll wait for you, love, but we'll always be there for you, you have us now, you don't have to go through your pain alone, you don't have to let your thoughts consume you, you're not alone.”
You felt your heart squeeze at Regulus' words, you were not alone, you had them, if this was a dream you never wanted to wake up.
Without thinking about it you approached Regulus, hugging him tightly and sinking into his arms, not without first taking James' hand so that he would also come closer, he didn't hesitate for a minute to hug you both.
“I love you, so much” You said softly, you wanted to say a million things, but at that moment you couldn't, you just wanted to sink into their arms and make everything else disappear, they knew it, they didn't move away for a moment, they didn't need words to know that you loved them.
“We love you more, dove, you have no idea” James said affectionately, running a hand through your hair in an loving gesture.
From your position you could hear the heartbeat in Regulus' chest, it was the best melody you had ever heard.
You wanted to stay like this forever, with them, they were everything you had ever dreamed of, you loved them.
Regulus carefully took your chin, lifting your face, his eyes were full of love, they were looking at you as if you were a dream.
“ May I?” murmured Regulus softly, his eyes fixed on your lips, he was asking for your permission, Regulus was asking for your permission to kiss you, and you felt like you would melt right there.
Almost instantly you nodded, there was no doubt in your mind that you wanted him to kiss you, even if you had never kissed anyone before, you wanted him to be the first, there was no doubt in your mind.
James was totally gawking at the sight of them, his heart was pounding in his chest.
Regulus didn't think too much before he gently cupped your cheek, bringing his face close to yours and pressing his lips to yours, you felt like you were in a dream, his lips were sweet and decisive on yours.
You felt all his love released in that kiss, it was as if he was pouring out all the love he had kept for you during all these years.
Your hands went to his hair, holding him close, your lips moved inexpertly over his, you wished it would never end.
Regulus seemed to feel the same, because it wasn't until you pulled away for air that he let you go, still holding your cheek.
Your lips were slightly puffy and your cheeks flushed, you were trying to catch your breath, and to James and Regulus you were the most beautiful thing they had ever seen.
“You've been waiting for this for a long time, haven't you?” James said to Regulus with some amusement, Regulus was in the same state as you, trying to catch his breath.
Regulus rolled his eyes slightly, before moving closer and leaving another kiss on your lips, this time a shorter one but with the same love, the boy had definitely become addicted to your lips.
When you pulled away you didn't know what to say, your cheeks were flushed, the smile on James' face didn't make you feel any less embarrassed, even in that state he looked at you as if you were a work of art.
“Damn I really want to kiss you” James gasped softly, bringing his hand to your jaw.
You didn't let James say anything else, you brought your lips to his and kissed him, to say you were scared was an understatement, but the moment your lips touched James' everything vanished.
James kissed you with such desire, his hand went from your jaw to the back of your neck, holding you close, his kiss was desperate but sweet, very different from Regulus, one of his hands went to your waist, pulling you closer to him and groaning in between the kiss.
James seemed to have been waiting for this moment all his life, at one point he lightly bit your lip, making you open your mouth and thrusting his tongue in, turning the kiss more heated, you felt your cheeks flush and you could barely keep up with him.
“James” Regulus called as a warning, making James pull away slightly, still keeping his grip on your waist.
“You'll have plenty of time for that later, let her process all of this first” Regulus said with amusement though there was some seriousness in his voice.
You were grateful to Regulus, sure the kiss with James was a dream, but your mind was still trying to process all of this, so you definitely needed to slow down a bit, this was all new to you.
James didn't look disappointed at all, he simply nodded slightly at Regulus, his face somewhat guilty, feeling that perhaps he had gone too far, he was much bolder than the black haired boy clearly, but if you needed to go slow he would wait as long as you needed to.
Even though your heart was still beating too hard in your chest you still wanted to prove to James that he had done nothing wrong, so you took his face and left a kiss on his lips, taking a moment to pull away.
“I love your kisses ” You said sweetly for James, showing him that all was fine, to which the boy's eyes lit up, giving you a small smile, god how you adored that smile.
That day all your fears vanished, you could feel a mess, a chaos, but among all the noise, there they were.
Finally the prophecy had changed for you.
Tumblr media
I hope you liked this, I think it's a bit long but I think it's worth it, I hope all my Prophecy girls enjoyed it, your turn will come, don't forget i xoxo.
419 notes · View notes
changetyre · 2 months ago
Text
Broken ⒾⓈⓌ
Tumblr media
SUMMARY: You and Max are having trouble trying to grow your family and your daughters are affected by it. Part of the Verstappen Family Verse
WARNINGS: Angst, miscommunication, pregnancy issues, a smidge of smut at the end.
A/N: This was requested over on Wattpad. Despite the angst, this is one of my favorite parts of this series.
Max stretched out, his back feeling painful after carrying all the presents he'd bought up from the parking lot before stashing them in a high cupboard in the house where he was sure nobody would look. It was late and he'd spent most of the day out looking for gifts, although truly it was also an excuse to get some space since the environment at home wasn't the best right now. 
The house was quiet when he arrived, a good indicator the girls were already asleep in their room and you as well probably. Although only a few months ago there wouldn't be a day you wouldn't wait for Max before going to bed, physically unable to go to sleep without hearing his voice but lately things had changed and you and Max often went to bed without exchanging any words at all. 
Once he finally made his way to your bedroom he wasn't surprised to find you were in fact asleep, clothes scattered around the room which you also hadn't bothered to clean up. Max sighed, he was tired having not really had a day of relaxation since the season ended despite imagining he'd spend his winter holidays differently, that things would somehow get better. 
He proceeded to pick up the room a little bit making it a little more presentable before taking a quick shower and joining you in bed. While his skin screamed to feel yours Max didn't feel comfortable enough to do so anymore, not knowing how you'd react to him placing an arm around you like he had done every night since you'd gotten together..until a few months ago. 
The next morning Max woke up to find you'd woken up but stayed laying there simply staring up at the ceiling, he knew your mind was spiraling but truly didn't want to ask anymore knowing you'd shut him out.  
"Hey," Max asked. His voice almost felt too loud for the silence. 
"Hi." Your voice was barely above a whisper, the sound almost strange to him not used to hearing it often anymore. 
"How d'you sleep?" Max asked. 
"I'm gonna go make breakfast for the girls." you ignored his question avoiding eye contact as you left the room leaving no more space for conversation. 
Once Max got himself ready for the day he went out to join you for breakfast finding you'd already eaten and were in the process of washing the dishes. He'd be lying if he said this didn't hurt him but held back from saying anything not wanting to start an argument. 
The rest of the day was mostly spent in silence apart from the laughter and ruckus from your children there were no words exchanged between you and Max. At some point, Max left the house once more wanting space. 
"Mama," Ivy called you as you played with both your daughters in the balcony. 
"Yeah, baby." Your daughters naturally made you smile, probably the only time you showed any sort of emotion lately. 
"Do you and Papa not love each other anymore?" She asked. 
Your heart skipped a beat, the immediate urge to cry reaching your throat and you only hoped your eyes gave no indication to the sudden burst of emotion. You noticed the way Lea's smile also dropped at the question, her attention ready to hear your answer. 
"Uhm, of course we do baby why would you think that?" You asked hoping your shaky voice didn't worry your daughters. 
"Papa doesn't blink at you anymore...like dis mama." Ivy showed you by blinking her eyes hard three times just like her father used to do to you almost daily before. 
The reminder of this almost broke you, you began picking up the girl's toys making sure they weren't able to see your face properly as you began crying. "You don't have to worry girls, everythings okay with Papa and me." You lied to your daughters, and it was evident by the weakness of your voice but you weren't sure what else to say. 
"Mama, are you okay?" Lea asked this time, her voice filled with concern, she was growing up, she of course noticed things, possibly understood things a little more than her sister and you knew you were hurting her, hurting them both and thought of this killed you inside. 
"I'm fine Lea, why don't you take your sister to your room and watch a movie, I'm gonna shower." You tried your best to force a smile wiping your eyes with the back of your hand before facing your older daughter. 
Lea simply nodded not wanting to cause you more distress before taking Ivy's hand and guiding her away. Once they were gone you let yourself cry it out. 
Trying and failing to conceive another child had been more emotionally draining than you had ever imagined it would be. You and Max had tried, tried, and tired to the point making love to him wasn't exciting anymore, it was frustrating, full of desperation, and so eventually, you stopped. You stopped trying, stopped connecting, stopped loving.  
Silence seemed like the easiest solution, not willing to face the reality of it all. Drowning in your own thoughts was exhausting but it seemed like the better option since potentially hearing the way you let down your partner, your family was worse. 
But it was obvious now, it was obvious how much this was already hurting your family so you had to toughen up now, muster enough strength to talk to Max, talk to your husband, and face whatever was next for you, whether good or bad it had to better than letting your daughters see the way things were falling apart between you. 
___________
Max once again came home to silence, he could hear the TV on in the girl's room and he didn't want to go to his room so instead decided to try to wrap up the presents in secret while he had the time. 
Max was semi-successful, his daughters had walked out of their room and been insistent on wanting to know what Max was doing despite him telling them several times to go back to their rooms and his patience was wearing thin. 
He was only able to get them to stay in their rooms after promising them a play date with their uncle Lando on the weekend if they behaved. Finally knowing they would stay in their rooms Max took the time to try to hide the gifts again so he could put them under the tree by the end of the month. 
He'd headed to the bathroom and when he came back anger and frustration flooded him at seeing Lea helping Ivy up to the counter to try to open the cupboard where he'd stashed the gifts. 
"LEA!" Max yelled letting his emotions control him for the first time with his daughters. 
Lea and Ivy both gasped and Max ran to catch Ivy who almost slipped off the counter trying to get down quickly. 
"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU WERE DOING! WERE YOU EVEN THINKING!? YOUR SISTER COULD'VE GOTTEN HURT!" Max yelled at his older daughter. 
You heard the commotion from the room running out to check on the situation. "I WANT YOU BOTH IN YOUR ROOMS, NO TV, NO GAMES, GO STRAIGHT TO BED!" Max continued yelling. 
Both Ivy and Lea were in tears at seeing their dad so angry for the first time in their lives, running straight to their rooms. 
"Max calm down." Your heart broke, you knew Max was never like this with your daughters and it scared you to see this side of him come out, feeling partly guilty for it. 
"Oh wow...so now you decide to talk to me." Max scoffed pushing past you and into your room. 
Your heart broke at the action, but he was right. You knew he needed time to cool off so you headed to your daughter's room to check on them. 
Opening the door you had to try to hold back your own tears at the sight. Lea held Ivy in her arms as they both sobbed. You couldn't say anything to afraid to burst into tears so instead sat by your daughter's bed and hugged them both. 
"I-I-I'm so-so-sorry-ma-ma." Lea hiccuped not being able to catch her own breath at how much she cried. 
This time you felt a few tears run down your cheeks. "Hey baby it's okay." You took her face in your hands trying to soothe her. "Lea honey it's okay." You blew gently on your daughter's face trying to calm her down. 
"Pa-pa's- ang-angr-angry." she continued hiccuping. 
"I know darling he shouldn't have yelled like that baby. He loves you so much, we both do." You reminded her kissing her forehead. 
Eventually, Ivy had fallen asleep crying on her sister's lap so you picked her up and moved her to her bed tucking her in. You then went back to your older daughter who was having a little bit of a harder time settling down. 
"Lea listen sometimes people get angry at other things and they feel so angry for a long time that when something else happens they just blow up and scream." You tried your best to explain to your daughter. 
"Like papa?" She asked. 
"Yeah like Papa Baby, Papa's feeling a lot of things because of something else and unfortunately he just took it out on you." You revealed. 
Little did you know Max was listening from outside, after cooling off a little he felt bad and meant to go apologize to his daughters but stopped once he heard you inside with them. 
"But why?" Lea asked. "Why is papa angry mama?" Lea was almost 6, you knew she was starting to get a better grasp of things and you also knew being honest with her would be the best thing for her right now so after thinking about it for a few seconds you decided to just be honest with her. 
"Do you remember on Ivy's 2nd birthday when she wished for a brother?" You asked your daughter. 
"Yeah," Lea replied moving her head to look up at you. 
"Well your Papa and I after that, after talking a lot tried to make another baby..."Your voice broke. 
Max's heart broke at hearing you struggle to speak. 
"Well, we tried for a long time and Mama just couldn't get another baby in her tummy which made both Mama and Papa really really sad." You revealed. 
"Why won't the baby go in your tummy mama?" Lea asked innocently, reaching for her little hand to wipe some tears off your cheek. 
"I don't know baby, maybe mommy's broken." You were full-on crying but you could see your daughter's understanding eyes at the situation. 
"Is that why Papa doesn't say I love you with his eyes anymore?" Lea asked again, oblivious to the impact her question had on her parents. Max fell to his knees outside the room distraught at the guilt he could hear in your voice, and about the fact that his daughters and possibly you thought he didn't love you anymore. 
"I don't know honey...maybe. It's not easy when you want something really really bad and you just can't get it so it can make you feel a lot of things, mommy feels like it's her fault that the baby doesn't want to go in her tummy." You tried to finish explaining. 
"I'm sorry Mama." Lea apologized once more. "But even if you are broken mama I'll still love you the same, I'll even say it with my eyes if you want." Lea smiled imitating her dad by blinking her eyes I love you just like her dad used to do. 
This time your tears were of gratitude at feeling the love your daughter had for you, the simplicity with which her mind understood the situation and tried to make you feel better. "Thank you, baby." You hugged your daughter placing kisses on her cheek. 
Lea settled enough, feeling a little better at understanding why things had been a little weird at home lately. You watched her fall asleep. You took a deep breath ready to have a difficult conversation with your husband praying it might go a little similar to the conversation you had with your daughter. 
You walked out of their room and were surprised to find Max sitting outside, his back to the wall with his face in his hands. You could tell he'd been crying from the wet spots on his shirt and trousers. 
"Maxy." You fell to your knees beside him. 
Max pulled his hands away as you both wrapped your arms around each other at the same time. You both started crying in each other's arms, Max holding you tightly against him. 
"You're not broken, I never thought so either I just wanted you to talk to me." He whispered. "I love you so much and I'm sorry I ever let you doubt it, and I'm sorry for screaming at Ivy and Lea, I'm just- I'm so sorry for everything" Max cried tucking his face in the crook of your neck.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry I felt so useless and frustrated I couldn't get pregnant. I know how long you've been trying to hold it together for us, for all of us and I shouldn't have ever let you carry all of it on your own. I'm sorry too for everything."  You also apologized. "I love you, Max, I don't think I'll ever be able to stop loving you I just wanted to give us another baby." 
"I know." Max sighed pulling back and wiping tears from under your eyes with his thumbs. "Look I would love to have another baby with you, I'd have a 100 if it was with you but I'm so enamored by the family you've given me already, our girls...they're the best thing that have ever happened to me and if trying to have another baby is gonna cost us...us...than I don't want it." Max was honest. 
You nodded agreeing with his words. 
"It doesn't mean we stop trying, we can if that's what you want but I just want you back first, I need us to be okay before trying again okay?" He asked you. 
"Yeah." You agreed once more. 
Max rested his forehead against yours. You heard him take a deep breath. "God I missed you." he sighed before leaning down to place his lips against yours. 
You kissed him back harshly almost desperate to taste him again mentally questioning yourself how you were able to survive without this for as long as you did. "I love you," you whispered as you momentarily pulled away to catch your breath. 
But Max kept kissing you not wanting for this to stop, as if his body was trying to catch up on all the time he spent without your touch. "I love you." He whispered back scooping you into his lap, your legs wrapping around him as he stood up with you in his arms before taking you to your bedroom. 
Laying you down on your shared bed it once again felt right, being shared with him. Max was quick to get you naked, teasing you as he prepared you for him.
"I adore you." He whispered as he slipped into you. You'd be okay.
550 notes · View notes
movedto-gemini-atz · 3 months ago
Text
Yunho as your Boyfriend (Realistic + Astrology Based)
Contains NSFW, minors please use caution or dni!! I will put all NSFW headcanons under a cut if you're looking for more fluffy feelings in general and would like to avoid.
Background/Disclaimer: !!This is all my own interpretation based on my personal astrology knowledge and research. I consider myself an amateur!!
Please see here for other members
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Genre / Au / Trope : Smut, Imagines
Rating: 18+ / 21+ / MDNI
Warnings: mostly vanilla, c0ckwarm1ng mention, Yunho has a tights fet1sh??
Follow my new URL
YUNHO SUN Aries MOON Gemini MERCURY Pisces VENUS Taurus MARS Scorpio
Yunho as your boyfriend feels like the personification of a hoodie just out of the dryer, just a big warm hug for you both physically and emotionally. He's unusually honest and he definitely asks you out first. Mercury in Pisces can be challenged by their ability to communicate their true thoughts, I can see him saying strange or awkward things in front of you the first few times you meet, but by the time he’s resolved to ask you out his Aries and Taurus can take over. He will be straightforward with his wants and needs and doesn’t appear nervous at all when asking you out. He just feels comfortable and easygoing to be around and a lot of that is stemming from his Moon in Gemini and that Venus in Taurus (literally so silly and fun, like the boy next door type). He can make you laugh endlessly, not in a way that he's TRYING to be funny, I think he just does things that he doesn't realize are so silly and cute, sometimes bordering on being funny because he’s being so awkward about something. If you guys drank together he'd probably turn into the aegyo machine just to make you laugh and cringe and then feel absolutely mortified the next day.
He craves physical contact from you as much as he can get, like the "I can't fall asleep unless at least my foot is touching you" type. When you're at a restaurant with a booth, he wants to sit in the same booth. When you've both just woken up in the morning and you're trying to brush your teeth in the mirror, he drapes himself over you, sleepily swaying and rubbing his face into the back of your head which would be super cute and sweet if he also didn't have one hand sneakily slipping up under your shirt. He doesn't think of himself as the jealous type, and you might not notice that he is either. Taurus Venus placements can be more chill that way but his Scorpio Mars has him possessive of you. It doesn't present itself as aggressively as it might in someone like San (Scorpio in Venus AND Mars oooo boy) but more like if you're at a party and he sees you talking to another guy he might come up behind you and wrap his arms fully around you, leaning down and planting a big kiss on the side of your neck before giving the other guy an innocent "What?" type look. Instead of directing his jealous energy at you or starting a fight, he simply physically shows everyone around that you're his. I think this works well with his Mercury in Pisces since articulating and getting their deeply felt emotions doesn’t often come across how they want; his natural ability to physically show you his affection means he won’t be insecure about whether or not you understand his love for you. But just because he has an easygoing nature, you shouldn't push him too hard in the jealousy department. He needs to feel that your care for him is equal. He's never careless with your feelings and these placements can be extremely wounded and not show it.
Yunho loves having matching keychains, shirts, pajamas, etc. with you. Taurans are all about good food and showing their love that way, you'd probably gain weight in no time because he wants to feed you CONSTANTLY. His instagram feed is just selfies of you guys trying out that new restaurant or cafe. Rather than going out on dates every weekend, he's more of a stay at home together guy; movie nights, two player games, just cuddling and making out energy. He isn't over the top with gifts/displays of love, it might seem like he isn't as passionate as others but the peace and comfort he can bring is so rewarding.
NSFW HEADCANONS
Tumblr media
Romantically and Sexually his Venus and Mars sign working together create a bit of a double identity, your friends might not even believe when you tell them what he's capable of in bed because they only see that goofy sweet side.
Oral. He loves it, both giving and receiving. He'd love eating you out to distract you from activities; You'd be in the kitchen trying to start dinner when you'd feel him behind you, burying his face in the crook of your neck and kissing your ear before whispering that he needs to taste you right now and if you let him the next thing you know he'd be dropping to his knees behind you, yanking down your shorts and panties and eating you from the back, just slurping and sucking and making plenty of noise like you were the best meal he’d ever had. In the morning you might find yourself woken up by him kissing your thighs and when he notices you awake, and he gives you those puppy eyes, seeking permission to just lay between your legs as long as he wants, lapping at your pussy. He’d move his head away when he feels you getting closer and closer to your orgasm and look up at you with the most innocent smile while you whimper his name pleadingly, As your peak fades he would dip his head back down to kiss your clit and by this time you’re so swollen and sensitive, the gentle pressure of his lips sends shocks of heat through your lower body before he starts back up again, dragging his tongue through your folds and groaning softly, his eyes closed in appreciation for your taste. By the time he’s ready to let you cum, one of your hands is already tangled in his hair, holding his face steady while you helplessly move your hips against him and he reaches up to clasp your other hand, his long fingers feeling cool and comforting against your feverish skin.
When it comes to sucking him off, he likes to see how long he can keep you down there. It's not even about cumming for him he just wants to watch you struggle to take all of him. There would be times you'd be in the mood and try to kiss him and sit on his lap while he's busy with a game only for him to give you a sympathetic smile and tell you "I'll take care of you once I'm done with this game baby." If you pout and try to walk away, he'd grab your hand and pull you back, leaning up to give you a kiss before flicking his eyes slowly down your body and telling you to "get under the desk". Twenty minutes later his cock has gone from soft to fully rock hard in your mouth and you've been warming him obediently under the desk for that long, moaning pitifully ever so often, your jaw starting to ache but your head and body feel floaty. No thoughts in your head, just a pliant hole for him. If you start to try sucking or moving on it he pushes your head back gently before returning it to his mouse. "Bad girl, not yet. Go ahead and play with yourself for me, I'm nearly done". Hearing the rustles of you slipping your hand into your soaking panties to touch yourself while trying to hold yourself back from sucking him nearly drives him over the edge but he's able to keep it together long enough to finish his game before taking his headset off slowly and slightly moving his chair back. He’d gently guide his cock from your mouth before slapping it heavily against your cheek a few times, sending little shivers down your spine at the weight of it. “What am I going to do with you?” He’d ask, tilting his head to the side with that boyish grin, petting the top of your head so gently while his other hand guides his cockhead to press against your lips , smearing his precum around and around. He’d be completely caught up in how swollen they were because of him.
As far as kinks or fetishes I am getting strong 'office lady' and socks/nylons guy from him. Black tights especially, he'd probably be buying a constant supply from how many he rips open to get to your pussy or how many get covered in his cum from him asking for you to use your feet on his cock while wearing them. Seeing you in a pencil skirt, tights and heels for a job interview would have him acting so crazy, by the time you walk back through the door it's on sight, he fucks you right there in the hallway, with your hands and face shoved up against the wall.
————————————————————————
This is my first Ateez imagine, it was a lot of fun and I haven’t written in a long time, I’ll work to keep improving! If you share some of Yunho s chart or know someone with his placements and agree (or disagree!) with some of the interpretations I’d love to hear about it, I’m always gathering data 🤣
570 notes · View notes
backwardsbread · 8 months ago
Text
Hazbin Hotel Characters:
~Marriage proposals~
Warnings‼️: genderneutral!reader, established relationship, characterxreader, lots of fluff, Valentino existing, mentions of cannibals/cannibalism, possessive behavior, pet names used, mentions of divorce, some swearing.
A/N: How would the Hazbin hotel characters propose! I might do a vise versa, where reader proposes. But this one is the characters proposing to YOU. Enjoy~!
This is pretty long- I don’t know how to find word count, but if anyone wants more, drop a request :))
?Semi proofread?
Lucifer:
This man is a NERVOUS WRECK.
When he realizes he wants to marry you, he lowkey panics. Starts acting like you guys just now started dating.
He’s super anxious, trying to impress you, and prove that he’s good enough for you.
(Whether he’s trying to prove that to you, or himself, is up for debate.)
The two of you met on a whim. You didn’t really know it was the king of hell you were talking to when you first met.
How could this be the king?? He was so goofy. His playful demeanor immediately drew you in.
With even learning about how Lucifer was, it didn’t stop those fuzzy feelings towards him that bubbled in your chest.
It took him a long time to even get into a relationship with you, due to him being caught up in his past with Lillith.
But overtime, your affection is what gets him through the tough days.
He gets all flustered and embarrassed at your sweet gestures, trying to hide the fact that he’s realizing he wants you to always only be his.
As we know, he had a previous marriage and that commitment failed him before. He had a right to feel nervous of the subject that once bruised his soul.
But in his heart, he truly knows this is what he wants. He wants to spend his eternity with you if you allowed him to.
When the thought has finally settled, and he knows he’s ready to try marriage again, it doesn’t settle his nerves.
This has to be PERFECT-
He needs the perfect ring, the perfect setting, the perfect outfit. All of which he had easy access to, he is the king afterall.
Yet, nothing seems to be perfect enough. Nothing is enough, nothing he can think of matches how strong his feelings are for you.
Once he thinks he’s decided on what will be perfect, he ditches the idea to try and come up with something better.
He consults Charlie on this issue a lot. Including her in this is very important to him. He makes sure she’s comfortable with the idea of him being married to someone who wasn’t her mother.
Charlie is a bit put off by the idea, it’s strange to think about. She never thought of her father getting remarried, but the thought doesn’t necessary upset her. She’s more worried about history repeating itself.
Overall, she wants her father to be happy, and helps him prepare for the proposal in any way she can.
(Mostly moral support because this guy is in emotional turmoil over this.)
He’s in a constant inbetween of if this was the right thing to do. Was it too soon in your guys relationship? Was it too soon after his divorce? Would you even want to spend the rest of your damnation with the one who started it all?
With heavy encouragement and reassurance from Charlie, he finally has the guts to ask you the big question.
But….. when he takes you out on the date where he meant to propose…
He chickens out. (Or ducks out haha)
“It is quite beautiful tonight.. you know I love you, right?……. Good! Yeah-! U-Uh-.. oh my golly! Look at the time! How that darn old thing does fly-Haha! W-We should head home!- boy am I tired-!”
Rinse and repeat this process a handful of times.
You do start to get a bit skeptical of your partners behavior. You guys had been going on extremely fancy dates at least once a week.
And while you had no complaints on spending time with Lucifer, you did notice his strange behavior.
The way his mood would incline before your guys’ date, and then suddenly decline when it was over. Then having to take the rest of the week to heal his pride.
It was just a big rollercoaster of emotions. You were starting to worry you were the cause of his stress.
(I mean. Technically you were)
During one of his many attempts in asking you, he had already internally given up when he stumbled over his words in the middle of dinner.
Your date was coming to a close, and like clockwork, Lucifer’s chipper mood deteriorated.
His shoulders slumped, he was pouty, and dragging his feet on the way back to the castle.
Before the two of you can enter, you grab Lucifer’s hand, stopping him. He gives you a confused look, posture straightening to look at you.
You give him small pecks all over his face, in hopes to cheer him up from whatever was troubling him.
Your actions have the affect you were hoping for, as he laughs and steals your lips into his own, a wide smile on his face as he rests his hands on your waist.
His nerves seemed to dissipate as he felt an overwhelming sense of security and love for you.
His body was moving before his mind could keep up. The moment just felt right.
He pulls away from your shared embrace, reaching into his pocket, and getting down on one knee. He opens the ring box, revealing the glimmering jewelry within it.
You look at him in shock and he returns the same look, surprised at his own actions. Well there was no backing out of it now- (saY SOMETHING LUCIFER-)
It takes him a few seconds to recover from the shock and he’s tempted to just pretend to tie his shoe. But you knew his intentions and watched the nerves wrack their way up his body once again.
Before he can even speak, give a speech he had rehearsed probably a hundred times in front of his mirror, you say yes.
And the relief that washes over this man— the weight that lifted off his shoulders in that moment— felt amazing.
You bend down with him, smiling ear to ear and chuckling as you realized this is why he was so worked up the past couple months.
Tears fill Lucifer’s eyes as he slides the piece of jewelry onto your ring finger.
You kiss away the tears that slip down his face and he wraps his arms around you, pulling you into a hug.
His tattered heart feeling stitched back together that day.
Alastor:
We all know Alastor isn’t the biggest on romance.
He’s a true gentleman, of course, but public displays of affection and intimate relationships weren’t his cup of tea.
The two of you had know each other for years in the afterlife, yet it was only recently you had put a label on your relationship.
Falling for you was never part of his plan.
He first saw you as an prey, only a possible soul he could claim for his ongoing collection.
But your sickening sweetness unfortunately grew on him over time. He once wanted to take advantage of it, but he became too fond of you to corrupt it.
You moved from his prey to his acquaintance.
You lived in cannibal town where he would frequently visit.
You join the gossip sessions with him and Rosie, indulging in their banter. It starts by you just walking by and throwing a comment towards their conversation you were listening in to. Eventually you had your own designated seat at their table.
Rosie definitely saw the potential the connection you and Alastor had, so she subtly pushes the two of you to hang out more.
This leads to your relationship advancing from mere acquaintances to good friends. The transition quick due to Rosie’s persistence.
Anytime Alastor would visit cannibal town, he would make effort to pay you a visit. He just felt so drawn to your company.
His smile felt less strained, his body would relax, and he could do what he wanted while you served up some fresh pinkie fingers.
There would be occasions of Alastor realizing he’s dropped his guard around you, and he would be snippy and aggressive those days. In fear of going soft and losing his mojo.
The first time he did this scared you,
(I mean obviously, the mans body grows two-ten times in his demon form)
But after a talk with Rosie about it, you tried to be understanding. Instead of falling away or distant with Alastor after his little tantrums, you simply waited it out. When he was back to normal asking softly if he wanted to talk about it or move on.
It wasn’t clear to you when you guys really started being affectionate towards one another. It just kind of happened.
You knew Alastor to be a gentleman before formally meeting him. So him linking arms with you, kissing your knuckles, holding open doors was nothing new.
It seemed like everyone besides the two of you knew the true feelings you two had for each other before you guys did.
You were holding hands, seeing each other everyday, Alastor would give you his coat to borrow on colder days, etc. Just small sweet gestures the two of you would share.
It took an incredible amount of time for Alastor to come to terms with his feelings. He hadn’t done this before and had no control of what his heart wanted. It was scary.
Putting a label on what you guys had didn’t seem necessary. The two of you knew what you meant to each other in an unspoken agreement.
(Rosie did eventually pressure him to actually ask you out however. It was the gentleman’s thing to do)
(But enough backstory)
More often than not, Alastor found himself spending his nights with you. Not to leave until the morning or midday after.
The two of you practically lived together when the overlord wasn’t too busy with other matters.
We already went over how the two of you weren’t big on labels. It wasn’t until Rosie asked that Alastor had even thought about marriage.
“Sooo… when are you going to put a rock on your pretty thang’s finger?”
“Hm? I don’t think it’s necessary.”
“What?? You’re kidding right? That darling and you have been together ages! You wouldn’t want someone else swiping them away from you, right?”
“Hah! Never going to happen. Who in their right mind would try that?”
“…”
“You do know where we are, right?”
It had never occurred to the Radio demon before. You guys had made your relationship official of course. Anyone else who would try and court you and take you away from him would be simply insane.
But the thought wormed itself into his brain and flourished.
The thought of not knowing what you were doing 24/7. The thought of someone possibly stealing you away without his knowledge.
The thought of some undeserving sinner having their hands on what belonged to him.
It irked him.
After that conversation with Rosie, say goodbye to your privacy. You’re not going anywhere alone. He can’t risk someone even attempting to steal you away.
It was irritating how he was always tracking you, keeping a shadow with you at all times.
If someone even dared to hold open a door for you that wasn’t him or his shadow, he’d show up at your side in an instant.
It made you anxious and overall, you felt your partner didn’t trust you.
You did express these feelings to Alastor, but your words seemed to phase right through him. You had no idea what had gotten into him to make him (even more) protective.
You joined him in bed one night, as he was stilling up, enjoying a book with jazz music emitting from his aura.
You cuddle close to him, the feeling of fuzzy static that enveloped you a comforter for your slumber.
Before you can let yourself drift off to sleep, your partner closes his book with one hand, the loud thump making you jolt.
“Say darling, what do you think of marriage?”
The sudden ask has you dumbfounded, giving him a deer in headlights stare. (Hah-)
He had never even mentioned marriage before yet here he was now, smiling at you as he waited for your response.
You give honesty, telling him you never really thought of it yourself and you were surprised to hear the idea from him.
You did mention how the subject didn’t draw you away. You knew you loved Alastor with your entire soul. Your heart and soul were his without one of his binding contracts.
Once he hears your approval he snaps his fingers making one of his shadows appear, holding out his signature red coat to him. He reaches into the pocket of his jacket, fishing out what he desired.
He pulled out a small box and handed it to you, his shadow dismissing itself from the scene.
You give him a confused look, before gently opening the box. Your eyes meeting the small band inside.
Oh- he was serious?????
You give him a puzzled look, while he just tilts his head at you, silently asking ‘too soon?’
Your eyes continue to track from the ring, to him, back to the ring, then back to him.
Your hesitation comes off as denial to Alastor, so he reaches out to take the box back. Before he can even lay a finger on it, you pull it to your chest protectively.
You give him a glare for even having the audacity to try and take this away from you. Your actions make him chuckle and hold his hands up defensively.
You slip the band onto your ring finger. Once it’s perfectly snug onto your digit, you pull your partner close to you, peppering his lips with small pecks. Scolding him in between your kisses for being so nonchalant.
He simply chuckles against your affections, telling you the ring will be a reminder you are always his.
And you wouldn’t have had it any other way.
Vox:
Vox is not one for settling down. No shot in hell.
Have you seen this man?? Holy hell take a chill pill.
A lot of Vox’s priorities lie with his work. He’s always pushing the boundaries of tech, eager to create something new and be on the face of it.
He never thought of dating. Being tied down to one person made him cringe. So the thought of marriage never even entered his system.
Then there was you of course. Messing up his plans.
How could he not fall for you? You were charming, beautiful, and down right too good for him.
(According to him.)
Your presence and the feelings you gave him made him feel threatened. He tried to put him a wall between the two of you, avoiding you at all costs.
But when he would look at his phone, seeing your icon pop up with messages to him. His fans would kick into gear, his cold heart ticking rapidly in his chest.
Yeah he had it BAD.
When you became a priority to him as well, it kind of threw a wrench in the balance of his schedule.
Yes he loves you but that fact scares him. He wasn’t exactly the safest demon to be around.
So he found it better that the two of you keep your relationship secret. Mostly spending early mornings and late nights with you.
It was difficult to manage. You wanted nothing more than to try hang out with your partner all day but he was always busy.
You would visit him at work, but on very rare occasion. You still owned your soul, which meant Valentino saw it as up for grabs, despite Vox’s warnings (threats) to not lay a finger on you.
As much as you enjoyed visiting your partner at work, you understood his reasonings for being uncomfortable with it.
Besides that, the chance of others seeing the two of you in public was way too high. You guys didn’t usually go on dates.
Your partner was more comfortable having you stay at home, having a double life without him. You lived with Vox, but outside of the time you two spent together, you had your own things going on.
Vox knew about it of course, he cares about you more than anything. He needs to know what’s going on at all times. And what you had going on outside of him was important to him.
He always has a screen pulled up in his monitor room while working. Just to see what you were up to.
The screen usually tracked a camera on you whenever you went out, it displayed your phone screen whenever it was in use, and showed your vitals on the bottom corner of the screen.
He didn’t trust the sinners that roamed these streets, rightfully so. Being able to track you gave him a source of comfort when he couldn’t always be around.
As mentioned before, going out on dates wasn’t really a thing. But Vox would usually clear up one day a month in his schedule. Just to spend the entire day with you.
(Of course he occasionally shuts down, checking how everything is going at V headquarters while he’s not around. Cant take this man entirely away from his work)
You’d spend those days cuddling, ordering in some takeout, and just catching up with each other. Getting in as much affection as you could.
The nights were soft and intimate. It was what you always looked forward to.
Vox had some things to do early morning on the day designated for the two of you. You did pout and complain to him, but he promised to be back as soon as he could.
Hours passed and you started to get a little bit peeved that your partner had yet to return home. Checking the time, you decide to take matters into your own hands.
You get dolled up, pack up a small container of snacks, and head to V’s headquarters.
Making your way through the crowd of demons and sinners. You head up the elevator, but it stops on Valentinos floor.
And with just your luck, the lustful demon is standing there, waiting to get on. When he sees your face, he grins wide and enters the elevator. Standing uncomfortably close.
He blows out his pink slut smoke into the small space, making you cringe and try to waft the stench away from you.
Valentino is touchy and that’s an understatement.
So when he bends down at your level, once again offering a job to you, your heart rate spikes.
Meanwhile, Vox is having a one sided argument with Velvette, the young overlord scolding him as she changed his outfit several times.
It wasn’t often Vox was used as a model for Velvette, but he had actually asked her ahead of time to design something special for you and him.
By ahead of time, he asked yesterday, not giving Velvette nearly enough time.
While he tuned out of his teammate reprimanding him, his watch buzzed, alerting him of your abnormal heart rate.
He gives a confused look, his screen going black for a second as he brought up his home security camera on his screen. When seeing you weren’t at the house, his eye twitched.
Where the hell did you go??
He was brought back, his face glitching in and out as he pulled out his phone, bringing up your location.
He saw how close you were and immediately thought the worst.
He zaps himself into the nearest camera, zipping through the electronics to find where you are.
Within a minute, he’s found you in the elevator, practically cornered by Valentino who was literally drooling on you.
The lights flicker in the elevator as it comes to a screeching halt. Cue your partner showing up with a crack of blue electricity, yanking Valentino away from you by the moth’s wing.
He puts himself in front of you, acting as a shield so you don’t have to be near Valentino’s poison.
“W̵̰̻͍̉̔̅̀̐͐͒͆̒̚ḥ̸̨̧̗̮̖̽̂̓̀̍̋͋́̅̃͘͜͝ǎ̴̯̀͠t̸̫̫̤͕̳̻̰̣̭́̌̉͝ͅ t̸̫̫̤͕̳̻̰̣̭́̌̉͝ͅḥ̸̨̧̗̮̖̽̂̓̀̍̋͋́̅̃͘͜͝ë̸͓̮͉͈͇͍̖͎̩̞͈́́́̋̇̾͋̈́̾͆͑͘͘͜͠͝ f̵̢̻͈̫̬̻͔̘̞͈̆̇̍̈̌͊ͅu̷̬̩̰̫͕̘͎̔́̃̄̍͋̓c̵̛̥͊k̵̘̺̦͉͖̪̪͖͉͊̆̔́̈́̍̃̈́͒̂̑̀̚͜͝ d̶̡̲̗̼̮̤̤̳̲͖͓͍͔͓̓̎̽́̽̏̐͂̆͆͘͘͘ŏ̸̡̼̺̫̥̻͈̞̍͆̏̓́͜͝ͅ y̶͔͗ŏ̸̡̼̺̫̥̻͈̞̍͆̏̓́͜͝ͅu̷̬̩̰̫͕̘͎̔́̃̄̍͋̓ t̸̫̫̤͕̳̻̰̣̭́̌̉͝ͅḥ̸̨̧̗̮̖̽̂̓̀̍̋͋́̅̃͘͜͝i̶̡̹͈͎̳̞͙͖̾̂̀͑̀͆̑̓̽̉͐͘͘ͅǹ̷̨͍̮̥̹̘͙̗̻̬̬̜̥̮̃̒̈́̽͗̿̍̄̂̏͆͠͝k̵̘̺̦͉͖̪̪͖͉͊̆̔́̈́̍̃̈́͒̂̑̀̚͜͝ y̶͔͗ŏ̸̡̼̺̫̥̻͈̞̍͆̏̓́͜͝ͅu̷̬̩̰̫͕̘͎̔́̃̄̍͋̓’r̵̡͕͈͚͍͍̼͕̍̀̈́̽̎̍͗̍́̏̚͜͠ë̸͓̮͉͈͇͍̖͎̩̞͈́́́̋̇̾͋̈́̾͆͑͘͘͜͠͝ d̶̡̲̗̼̮̤̤̳̲͖͓͍͔͓̓̎̽́̽̏̐͂̆͆͘͘͘ŏ̸̡̼̺̫̥̻͈̞̍͆̏̓́͜͝ͅi̶̡̹͈͎̳̞͙͖̾̂̀͑̀͆̑̓̽̉͐͘͘ͅǹ̷̨͍̮̥̹̘͙̗̻̬̬̜̥̮̃̒̈́̽͗̿̍̄̂̏͆͠͝ǧ̷̡̟̲̹̩̱͉̮̭͇͚̮̖̟̽̓͊̔̓̕??”
(What the fuck do you think you’re doing??)
Vox’s voice glitched out, muted TV static layering his voice as the fans whirled in the back of his head. In a desperate attempt to cool him down.
Valentino doesn’t give much of a reaction, putting his hands up in feigned innocence.
“𝒟𝑜𝓃’𝓉 𝓌𝑜𝓇𝓇𝓎 𝒱𝑜𝓍𝓍𝒾𝑒! 𝐼 𝓌𝒶𝓈 𝒿𝓊𝓈𝓉 𝑜𝒻𝒻𝑒𝓇𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝑜𝓃𝑒 𝓁𝒶𝓈𝓉 𝓉𝒾𝓂𝑒 𝒷𝑒𝒻𝑜𝓇𝑒 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓉𝒶𝓀𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓂 𝒻𝑜𝓇 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇𝓈𝑒𝓁𝒻-“
“You better watch your mouth.”
“𝒪𝒽𝒽, 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒽𝒶𝓋𝑒𝓃’𝓉 𝒶𝓈𝓀𝑒𝒹 𝓎𝑒𝓉. 𝒲𝑒𝓁𝓁 𝓂𝓎 𝒷𝒶𝒹 𝒻𝑜𝓇 𝓈𝓅𝑜𝒾𝓁𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒷𝒾𝑔 𝓈𝓊𝓇𝓅𝓇𝒾𝓈𝑒.”
Valentino speaks with sickening sarcasm. You look between the two, incredibly confused. Vox looks like he’s about to explode.
The lights flicker back on, and the door opens, Vox demanding his business partner leave.
The moth scowls at the both of you, before putting one set of hands on his hips, the other set of arms crossing across his chest. In the most sassy way possibly leave the two of you behind.
Vox waits for the elevator door to close before he can breath again. He’s muttering angrily to himself, one hand on either side of his screen as he tries not to blue screen.
You put your hand over his, his cold hand giving you a subtle shock of electricity as you touched him. You give him a concerned gaze, silently asking if he was okay.
Vox looks at you, shoulders relaxing just looking into your comforting eyes. Little bolts of electricity shoot out from the side of his screen as he tries to calm himself, his fans working overtime.
You set down the bag of treats you were bringing for him to hold his hands in your own. You give him a bright smile, concern not leaving your eyes.
You reassure him that whatever he had planned isn’t ruined. You could just pretend you didn’t know! You didn’t want this little run in to ruin your guys’ day.
You ramble on as he just stares at you, almost blankly, his screen fading from blue to a baby pink as he listened to you.
As you’re apologizing for causing trouble, he puts a hand up to stop your little speech.
He reaches into his pant pocket, pulling out a small halo shaped piece of jewelry. He holds your left hand in his own as he gets down on one knee in front of you.
I mean.. you knew he had a surprise planned, but seeing his actions didn’t fail to shock you.
He gives a little speech to you, stuttering and glitching over his words as he tries to explain himself.
For being a perfectionist overlord, this was one hell of a show.
He’s a blushing glitching mess, cursing to himself when he couldn’t find the exact words he wanted to say.
You grab the sides of his screen, looking him in the eyes and forcing him to meet your gaze. You’re saying yes before he can embarrass himself anymore.
He looks a bit shocked by your response, he can’t believe you said yes after that display he just put on. Before he can get the ring on your finger, he blue screens from shock and embarrassment.
You kind of chuckle and sit down beside your partner while you wait for him to reboot. Not like you could go anywhere with the elevator being stuck with the two of you inside. You do gently take the piece of jewlry, sliding it onto your finger and admiring its design.
Cuddling into Vox’s arm, you can’t help but smile brightly at the decorative piece snug on your ring finger.
It was perfect.
946 notes · View notes
avocado-writing · 8 months ago
Note
Can I request companions + Halsins reactions to a tav who snorts when they laugh really hard and is embarrassed about it so they try to control their laughter as much as possible?
OH i love this one!!
Tumblr media
Astarion
oh he is delighted when he first hears you.
will 👏 not 👏 stop 👏 teasing 👏 you 👏
but you know he doesn’t really mean anything by it. if you tease him back about things in return, he thinks it’s all good fun.
eventually becomes quite fond of your laugh. it’s nice to hear something so genuine when he lives a live of exaggeration and attempting to hide his emotions.
begins to smile whenever he hears it.
Gale
so so so so pleased to have made you laugh that hard.
he sees the way you cover your mouth in embarrassment and lets you know that he finds your laugh charming. he can see how flustered that makes you but you seem pleased, too.
goes out of his way to make you chuckle from that point on. more than usual, anyway, and he looks so happy whenever you snort because of him. expect lots of daft puns.
you think maybe you’ve laughed more with Gale than you have for the rest of your life.
Wyll
genuinely taken aback, but doesn’t mean to be rude.
when he sees you’re humiliated by it, he quickly reassures you that there’s nothing wrong with how you laugh, he just didn’t expect it.
you’ve been so solemn on this journey so far, after all — he thought you were just averse to humour, not that you were trying to hide how you sounded!
encourages you to laugh more, not cover up this lovely thing about you. if anyone has anything to say about it?? well your Blade will step in ❤️
Karlach
“oh my GODS I love your laugh!”
she’s so chuffed to hear it properly! you sound so lovely!
her laugh is loud too, big and booming and takes over the whole camp.
she tries to get you to laugh more. if she knows you’re ticklish, she will descend upon you until you’ve lost it, just left in tears.
it’s hard to feel self conscious about it when she’s there, making you so happy!
Lae’zel
also not known for her sense of humour… but something happens to make you laugh one day, and you snort so loudly.
she is so shocked that she starts to laugh too, and it’s such a strange sound! like a croak. you can’t help but giggle in response.
and then the two of you are just there, like you’ve had Hideous Laughter cast on you, losing yourselves at the silliness of the situation, stuck in utter joy at each other’s laughs.
eventually you compose yourselves. she looks you in the eye, wipes away a tear.
“we never speak of this again.”
Shadowheart
giggles when she hears you, then manages to get ahold of yourself.
“sorry, sorry. I just wasn’t expecting… that.”
confesses that she’s unused to much laughter due to her upbringing, so she understands your serious nature.
but, at the same time, encourages you to express your feelings. she knows she’d love to hear you laugh more. she finds it quite sweet, actually.
and if anyone mocks you? well, no heals for them.
Halsin
also overjoyed.
does what he can to bring the sound out of you more. it quickly becomes one of his favourites.
when you confide you’re self-conscious about it, he reassures you:
”my heart, there are many wonderful sounds in nature that perhaps we don’t expect. maybe yours is one of them. it makes it no less beautiful.”
then he turns into a bear and does a forward roll which leaves you in stitches 💕
720 notes · View notes
fangsandfeels · 1 year ago
Text
The vagueness of Astarion sleeping mechanics drives me mad sometimes
So, the game says that elves don't sleep - to the point where it's ironically stated that the only way for them to experience sleeping is to either drink a potion of Angelic Slumber or "get hit really hard with a chair".
Instead, they enter a semi-aware meditative state (Revery) where they experience memories from their past lives (usually most positive and emotional parts). Or they just sorting through their current memories.
Now, we've seen Astarion meditating if his way of lying on a bedroll is anything to go by. He is also immune to sleeping spells. We could also see him sleeping (in a Durge run). I know that devs technically recycle the same sleeping pose for all romanced companions, but still. Also, Astarion has nightmares, which is not typical for elves.
Of course, when I was going through the lore, I scratched the surface, but from what I understood, Revery is supposed to be a controlled state, and nightmares aren't exactly controlled.
But, I've found a very interesting bit that (so far) is still considered part of the official canon:
Elves can sleep and dream just like any human, but almost all surface elves avoid doing so. Dreams, as humans know them, are strange and confusing to elves. Unlike the actual memories of one’s primal soul, present life, or past lives, dreams are uncontrolled products of the subconscious, and perhaps the subconscious minds of those past lives or primal souls as well. An elf who dreams must always wonder whose mind these thoughts first arose from, and why. Priests of Sehanine Moonbow are an exception: they sleep and dream to receive signs from their god, and elves consult such priests to interpret their own dreams."
From: Mordenkainrn's Tome Of Foes, Chapter 2: Elves
And not only does this little bit explain a lot, but it also provides some food for your fic writing purposes.
Now, I'm entering the headcanon territory, so be warned.
Astarion's access to Revery got horribly fucked up after he had been Turned. Not only does he no longer have access to his previous lives since he is technically dead and plucked from the cycle, but he also can't even have his happy or good memories before he became a spawn. Even if they are still there, somewhere in the memory palace, getting to them requires going through the catalog of traumatic and painful memories he acquired after being enslaved by Cazador. It's like running through a burning house trying to rescue your family photo - and the hall gets longer each time. So, entering a trance means confronting the worst memories of his life over and over because there is nothing else there.
Due to this Astarion may resort to sleeping, which elves don't usually do. Elves don't like dreams because dreams are subconscious, and they can't be controlled, which scares them. For Astarion, however, it means there is a chance of him subconsciously dreaming of something nice or just being blissfully empty. However, it doesn't safeguard him from nightmares which (because they are the product of his unconsciousness) get even more twisted than simple memories.
Additionally, there can be a possibility that after becoming a spawn he got cut off from meditation and trances completely, relying on sleeping only: at least, the cut spawn epilogue by Withers mentions how while Astarion needs to sleep again, he doesn't sleep alone. While we don't know what that means exactly (and whether it will ever be implemented in the game), I assume that the tadpole gave him the ability to meditate back, but it was a small improvement because his memory headspace no longer holds happy memories capable of offering solace or refuge.
So, my personal headcanon is that he switches between meditating and sleeping depending on how aware he needs to be, and whatever option feels less torturous at the moment.
For instance, in his Origin run, when he remembers the moment of Cazador carving scars into him, he is in a trance. Which is why the memory is so horribly vivid, as if he is reliving it anew.
However, when he has a nightmare where Cazador finds him, he is sleeping and experiencing a memory affected by his subconsciousness. Which is why he jolts himself awake and desperate to know the limits of his freedom.
So, yes, the man literally can't catch a break.
On a happier note (and for your hurt/comfort fanfiction purposes), once Astarion starts traveling with Tav and the group, his memory bank gets updated with memories that are actually fun and nice, so he has something to linger upon when he is meditating. Sleeping gradually becomes a bit more pleasant experience because his subconsciousness got more material to work with, so the quality of his non-controlled dreams has to gradually improve.
1K notes · View notes
keigosdear · 5 months ago
Text
{bad idea... right? - kuroo t.}
yes I know that he’s my ex, but can’t two people reconnect?//…I just tripped and fell into his bed.
kuroo x fem!reader smut. exes to lovers. 18+ MDNI please.
in which you and your ex "reconnect" after almost half a year apart, but with so many unresolved feelings, it'll either end up being the best or worst idea you've ever had.
Tumblr media
warnings: fem!reader, no physical description (aside from specific genitalia ofc). university setting. smut, mentions of alcohol/getting drunk but no drunk sex, lots of feelings/kinda mutual pining. praise kink, a little bit of voice kink, very brief jealous reader, cunnilingus, body worship, teasing, lots of pet names in lieu of y/n, soft dom!kuroo and sub!reader, very. very. soft, kinda emotional sex, aftercare and fluff towards the end. porn with a bit of plot/build up. this fic is my baby.
a trope I never thought I'd write plus a genre I've never written before? apparently so. it's my first time writing smut, so constructive criticism is welcomed, being rude is not. can you believe I started this over the summer ‘23 and I'm only posting it now?
and lmk if I need to add anything else to the warnings :)
divider credit to: @/cafekitsune
Tumblr media
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
this truly had the potential to be one of your worst ideas yet.
you weren't even going to be at this damn party to begin with, but your friend finally convinced you to go with her after a week of wearing you down.
"it'll be fun, c'mon!" she begged.
the only reason you didn't want to go was because you were finally done with your first semester of classes and wanted to wind down in peace, not at a crowded house party filled with loud music and sweaty drunk university students.
but of course you relented when she pulled out the puppy dog eyes and played the "but we haven't hung out in months, I miss you!" card.
so there you were by the snacks and refreshments table, dressed up and nursing a drink, talking and laughing with your friends. truthfully, you were having a better time than you thought you would and figured that you had almost a month before classes started back up again to relax.
"soooo? has anyone caught your eye yet?" multiple faces focused their attention on you.
you knew part of the reason your friend had insisted on you going with her was to help you meet someone. she'd never admit it, but it was pretty obvious with the way she was pointing out people left and right, making note of how attractive they were. at one point she had even "accidentally" pushed you into one of her targets, which had made for some very awkward small-talk on your end with someone you had zero interest in and some giggling from her.
it's not that you were opposed to the idea of finding someone, but in all honesty, no one had caught your eye. recently you had gotten out of a long long term relationship, and starting over after that just seemed so... unappealing to you.
it also seemed unfair to start anything new when you were very much not over him. breaking up in the middle of the semester had made it really easy for you to push down any emotions and throw yourself into your studies. but it didn't change the fact that you missed him. even now, the party acted as a good distraction for you.
or so you thought.
you were about to respond when your phone buzzed. you looked down and your heart leapt into your throat when you saw the contact name.
it felt strange seeing it as "kuroo" rather than some version of his given name or a pet name. once you hit the one minute mark of just staring at the text notification in shock, your friend peeked over your shoulder and gasped a little.
"you didn't block him?!"
you snatched your phone out of her hand after she stole it to show your group of friends.
"why would I? it's not like we hate each other."
and it was true- you both ended amicably (though very reluctantly). you only ever wanted the best for each other, and while it was sad, you realized that at this point in your lives with how busy you both were, you weren't able to offer that anymore.
you’d rather this than end things resenting each other.
still, it was a hard pill to swallow, so for now you were just holding it on your tongue, letting the bitter taste of the coating settle instead.
she frowned. "well yeah, but-"
you cut her off before she could bring up the very emotions you were ignoring in that moment and shoved your phone back in your pocket. "c'mon, let's go dance!"
later, though, when you excused yourself to the bathroom, the first thing you did was down your second drink and read the text.
hey.
do you want to come over?
you stared at the messages for another minute, reading and re-reading them over and over again before sighing. being with him for years meant you knew him like the back of your hand, and he wasn't one for casual hook ups or one night stands. you hadn't even heard from him in a few months- this was the first bit of contact you'd had with him since you cleaned out your drawer of clothes at his place.
which meant he was either drunk and missing you or someone was playing a prank and you'd just end up a fool.
seriously weighing the options in front of you, trying not to let your emotions overpower your decision making, you attempted to think about the long term consequences of going over.
no matter how you spun it, it sounded like a bad idea. even if he did send the texts, there was no guarantee he wanted anything out of it.
but you were too tipsy for logic at that point in the night, and if you were being honest with yourself, you were in need of some excitement.
yeah.
I'll send my new address.
wait, he moved?
despite being together for so long, the two of you never ended up living together, opting for dorms and student houses with friends. still, you did spend a lot of time at his old place, and before the breakup you had even talked about the possibility of moving in together after the current school year was done.
you didn't linger on the sour feelings that brought up and instead decided to let your friends know you were leaving. when they asked where you were going, you spun some lie about not feeling well and wanting to head home before you got worse. you didn't really care if they believed you or not.
checking the address he had sent you once more, you made your way out of the house and were pleasantly surprised to realize it wasn't that far of a walk, especially since you were wearing uncomfortable party shoes.
you sipped on the bottle of water you swiped form the refreshment table and tried to sober up a bit more before seeing him. you weren't a hundred percent sure what would happen once you got there, but it was a good idea to be prepared for anything.
eventually you made it up to his apartment, which was in another student housing building off campus, bigger than his old place, and took a moment to compose yourself.
there was still time to turn back and make an excuse for why you bailed.
there was still time to think it through.
there was still time to save yourself from the possibility of more pain.
you took a deep breath and knocked on the door anyway.
not even five seconds later, the door was opening and you were face to face with your ex boyfriend.
you took him in for the first time in months- really took him in. sure, you'd seen his instagram posts since breaking up, but you could only zoom in so far on those. and fine, maybe your friends had tried to set you up with people they had deemed "much hotter", but you never saw the appeal. you couldn't even remember any of their faces in that moment, because kuroo was right there.
his hair was the same as always, slightly messier than usual, exactly how it looked whenever he (or you) would run his hands through it on a particularly stressful day.
had he been stressed about the text? did he regret it?
he was dressed somewhat casually, in a dark red shirt you recognized as part of a birthday gift you gave him one year (you had always liked the colour red on him). he was wearing black sweatpants and his socks were mismatched.
everything about him was familiar, and you hated the way a feeling of ease settled over you when he finished his own analysis of you and gave a boyish, almost giddy grin. "hi."
his voice was warm and gave you butterflies. there was an undertone of excitement in his greeting and it quelled your worries about him regretting the texts.
you decided to smile back, though somewhat shyly (which you inwardly scolded yourself for), and spoke up. "hi."
he didn't let the silence that followed settle into awkwardness. he opened the door a bit wider, and welcomed you in. ever the gentleman, he took your coat and and helped you balance as you took your shoes off. you tried to ignore how warm and gentle his touch was, how it made you immediately crave more.
you made your way into the living room and took everything in. there were empty cans and shot glasses littered across the room, mostly concentrated on the coffee table. you thought you heard him swear under his breath when he looked at the mess as well.
"did you have a party?" you asked, now close enough to smell a bit of alcohol on him.
he shook his head and looked a bit embarrassed. "ah, no..." he rubbed a hand over the back of his neck and sighed. "my roommates went out with some friends tonight and decided to pre-game here. I went back to my room before they left because I didn't feel like drinking too much and assumed they'd clean up a bit..."
you nodded in understanding. "wishful thinking, huh?"
he chuckled. "yeah, guess so," he said, then gestured to an empty spot on the couch. "sit, I'll just get some of this out of the way quickly."
"oh, I can help-" you tried to offer but he waved you off.
"don't worry about it. I'm the one who invited you into a sloppy apartment, you shouldn't have to clean up a mess that isn't yours."
you snorted and watched as he shoved a ton of cans into the decorative waste bin by the sofa and took some glasses to the sink in the kitchen. "says the one who's cleaning up a mess that isn't his."
you heard him laugh at your words and the butterflies erupted in your stomach again. you hadn't realized how much you missed that sound. suddenly your mind wandered back to the reason behind his invitation. you'd be alone tonight?
once he returned from the kitchen and sat down next to you, you talked for a bit. he caught you up on the moving situation (him and a few friends found an opening for the second semester, so they decided to jump on it and try to stay until grad, hopefully. he made a joke about trying to make friends with the landlord). you listened closely, trying not to make it obvious you were hanging off his every word.
when he was done, you caught him up on your life and how you were at a party when he texted. he apologized for interrupting and you told him a little too fast not to be, which he seemed pleased with.
after a while, he asked if you wanted to watch a movie. you agreed, though you were starting to get impatient. you knew he wasn't the type of guy to ever expect anything from anyone, but the curiosity was eating you alive. you couldn't help but finally ask him about it halfway through the movie.
"hey... why did you invite me tonight?"
he didn't seem surprised by your question, which told you he was probably expecting it. (it was silly of you to think he couldn't tell when something was on your mind after years together and only months apart.)
he took a deep breath in and looked down at his lap. while he didn't look outwardly nervous, you knew him well enough to know what his tells were. he picked at a thread on his pants, trying to compose himself before dropping the bomb.
"because I missed you." he looked you in the eye and then continued. "a lot. and you can take that however you'd like. I'll let you decide."
you blinked at him. he'd let you decide? the way he said it implied that he missed you, missed you. not just missed having you in his life, not just as a friend- he missed you.
you would be nothing but a liar if you said you hadn't missed him too. and you knew that the feeling of security and familiarity you experienced earlier wasn't just nostalgia or your own unresolved feelings. if that were the case, you wouldn't be feeling this comfortable on the couch with him. you wouldn't be able to pretend things were normal between you as easily as you had been all night.
kuroo still very much felt like home, and you didn't want to let him go ever again. there was only one way for you to take his declaration.
"can I..." you looked into his eyes and tried not to drown in them. "can I kiss you?"
he looked relieved at your words and eagerly nodded. "please."
you leaned forward and feverishly crashed your lips against his as soon as the word left his mouth. he raised one hand to cup your cheek and pulled you closer to him by your thigh with the other, not once breaking away from you.
soon you were straddling his lap and wrapping your arms around his neck, quiet noises releasing into the air around you both. you moved a hand up the back of his neck, into his hair, and he groaned slightly into your mouth.
you giggled into the kiss, happy to see you still knew what got him going.
as if either of you could forget- it was muscle memory at that point. just like you'd never forget how to ride a bike, you'd never forget how to make the other feel good.
eventually you both had to pull away and fill your lungs again, but you were close enough that your foreheads touched and your breaths mixed.
it was quiet aside from some light panting, so you decided to break that silence with a confession of your own. "I missed you too, tetsurou. so much."
now, you weren't sure if it was what you said or how you said it, but as soon as the words left your mouth, you felt something hard pressing against the area between your legs and gasped a little.
your eyes opened and you pulled your face away just enough to look at him properly. your eyes met his and his face was tinged pink. "I- I'm sorry... we don't... if you don't want to..." he mumbled, not sure how to gage your reaction to this sudden development.
you kissed him again, softer this time to reassure him, and smiled a bit when you pulled away. "I want to, tetsu."
he let out a relieved sigh and smiled at you in turn, then glanced over at the door. "I have no idea when they'll be back... do you want to continue this in my room?" his eyes slowly and hopefully made their way back to yours.
you nodded and squealed a bit when he suddenly scooped you up in his arms, smile growing wider as he made his way to his bedroom.
and that’s how you got here- cutting to when he gently sets you down on the bed, and you scoot back a bit to lay down comfortably. quickly following, his body covers yours and he begins kissing you again.
your arms instinctively move, one wrapping around his broad shoulders, the other cupping his cheek as you move your lips against his. his own hands, now free due to the fact that he’s propped up on one of his forearms, caress your waist and the the top of your head respectively.
after a few minutes of him focusing on your lips, he starts making his way down your neck. they’re feather light kisses at first to make you giggle, but eventually he finds the sensitive spot he always loved to mark up and the sweet sounds turn into shallow, shuddery breaths.
you whine as soon as he starts sucking on it and you bring your hand up from his cheek to his hair. "mmn... tetsu..."
he pulls away just enough so that you can still feel his lips against your flesh as he trails them up your neck to hover just over your ear. "you have no idea," he breathes out, voice low and far more erotic than you think he intended, "how much I've missed this."
you shudder and turn your face away at the tingly sensation, but the hand on your waist darts up to tilt your chin back in his direction. one thing you always appreciated about kuroo was how tenderly he handled you, no matter the tone of your late night endeavors. he was always gentle with you- not in a way that made you feel fragile, but rather in a way that told you he truly cared for you, treasured you, adored you.
the idea that this is still the case turns you on even more and makes your brain go a bit fuzzy.
when your eyes met his once more, you could see that adoration pooling in them. “look at me, sweetheart.”
you nodd slightly in his firm, yet still very soft grasp and keep your eyes trained on his. you could feel yourself getting wet as they trail over your face, and you swear your entire body feels warm as he gives you a rare type of smile only reserved for times like these.
he leans in to kiss you again and his hand moves from your face to toy with the lower hem of your dress. “you look absolutely gorgeous in this, baby, but do you think can we take it off?” he’s still speaking in the low, sultry tone that always drives you wild- you’re certain that you’d do anything he asked of you with that voice.
you sit up a little and move to unzip the dress, but he takes your hands and gives you a look. “ah ah- let me, pretty girl, you don’t have to move a muscle.”
it’s almost jarring how easily you both fall back into it. as soon as your dress is off, his shirt follows and he’s back to hovering over you. it really feels as though no time has passed since your last time with him.
just more proof that this is right.
he wastes no time in ridding you of your bra and himself of his shirt before pushing you back down onto the bed.
the room is once again filled with sounds of soft moans and gasps as he kisses your chest and takes one of your nipples into his mouth. he alternates between swirling his tongue around it and sucking. kuroo didn’t let your other breast go unattended for long, though, as he begins teasing the hardened bud with his fingers.
“aah, tetsu… please…” you gasped out.
the man on top of you chuckles, and in between switching sides he looks at you from under his eyelashes. “still so sensitive, hm? it’s cute.”
you resist the urge to hide your face and instead opt for throwing your head back when he suddenly sucks on the other nipple.
heat continues to build inside of you until he eventually he trails his kisses down the valley of your breasts, across your ribcage and down to your tummy. he spends a little extra time there, and you have to gently tug on his hair and whine about him taking too long for him to break away from your skin.
“let me worship you, angel. missed your body so much.” his voice is barely audible, the words murmured as though he was in a trance. you feel your pussy clench around nothing at his confession and bite back a whimper.
his lips curl upwards while pressed against your stomach and his eyes flicker up to meet yours. “keep your eyes on me, baby. don’t ever want to be away from you again,” he commands.
he rests his chin on your pubic bone and traces the elastic band of your panties with two familiar fingers. “you wore my favourite.”
heat rushes to your face and you do turn away this time, but he makes a disapproving noise you’re all too familiar with. “sweetheart, what did I just tell you?”
you bite your lip and force your eyes back to his.
he rewards you with a tender kiss to your belly and a “there’s a good girl, knew she was in there…” before he pulls your panties off.
you grow nervous, though you know you don’t need to be with him, and close your legs. his eyes soften significantly at the action. you're not sure why exactly the nerves get to you now of all times, especially considering how much you like his stricter side, but they do and he sees it.
he drops the strict act and rubs reassuring circles to your inner thigh. you've always preferred your softer sessions, anyway. “hey, it’s alright. I’m gonna take good care of you… missed my girl so much, just want to make you feel good, okay? we’ll save that for another time. it’s just you and me now, baby.”
you nod and a wave of calm washes over you at the reassurance. you let him pry your legs apart and gasp as he dives in.
he starts with wet kisses working their way up your thighs, to your slit and then up to your clit before he takes the bud into his mouth and sucks on it. you let out a soft moan and buck your hips into his face.
"mmn," he pulls away for a second and holds your hips down. "don't thrash, princess, just let me do all the work."
and he does. once he really gets into the groove of eating you out, you're a mess on his bed- legs shaking over his shoulders, cunt clenching around his tongue and whimpering out little thank you's when he makes you cum for the first time that night.
but he doesn't stop there. "tastes so good, baby, need more," he says in between licking your juices from your folds. "c’mon, just one more. you can do it," he picks up the pace again, and before you know it you're begging for more, too.
"tetsu- ah~!" you moan when he exchanges licking for sucking on your still sensitive clit again. you feel like you're on fire as he draws you closer and closer to reaching your second high.
you tangle your hands in his hair and he groans, sending vibrations throughout your core. you cry out and arch off the bed, spilling into his mouth.
this time when he pulls away, he slithers back up your body and kisses you. "see how good you taste, baby? best in the world, haven't I always told you that?"
your stomach twists from the praise and you turn your head to the side bashfully, trying to stabilize your breathing. he holds himself up above you and strokes your cheek with his knuckles, watching you fondly. it does nothing but make you more dizzy with affection.
when you've calmed down enough, he whispers "do you still want to-"
"yes." you cut him off and he chuckles.
"okay baby," he crawls off of you and reaches for his nightstand. he opens the drawer and-
your stomach sinks when you see an open box of condoms. the thought of him being with other girls makes you feel green with envy which you suppose isn’t fair considering you’ve been broken up for months, but you’re still a little fuzzy and too high on your own emotions right now to care.
he looks between you and the box and immediately catches on when an unexpected tear falls from your eye.
“oh, baby no-“ he takes one from the box and quickly returns to your side. “I haven’t been using these,” he cups your face and strokes his thumb under your eye.
“you haven’t?” you sniffle and he shakes his head right away.
you pout. “but then-”
kuroo cuts you off with a roll of his eyes. “one of my roommates got them for me as a joke for my birthday. I only opened them because he kept asking to borrow them.”
you digest his words and slowly look up at him. he’s already looking at you and you can’t keep your eyes from watering some more. the thought of him being intimate with someone new when you’ve spent the past few months rejecting everyone your friends forced your way.
“I haven’t even looked at anyone else since we broke up,” he murmurs against your hairline. “missed you too much.”
you nod, finding no traces of dishonesty on his features. “I haven’t been with anyone either… I wasn’t over you. I didn’t want to be,” you admit, voice soft.
he smiles and presses kisses from your scalp down to your cheeks. “such a sweet girl I have, hm? how about you help me out here?”
he tugs off his sweats and your attention is drawn to the tent his boxers. you bite your lip and reach for the band but he takes your hand and places the condom on your palm.
you blink up at him, confused. “you don’t want me to-“
he shakes his head and tugs his boxers down. his cock springs free and you gasp a little at the sight of his tip- red and smeared with pre-cum.
“no, angel, I need to be inside of you. just help me put it on.”
you make quick work of tearing the wrapper off and rolling the condom over his length. he groans at the feeling of your knuckles grazing his skin, but as soon as you pull away he’s flipping you on your back and lining himself up against your entrance.
he knocks his forehead against yours. “ready, baby?”
you nod and wrap your arms around his neck to pull him closer. he leans down for a kiss and slowly pushes into you as your lips connect.
you whine a little at the stretch and he pauses everything. “you’re okay,” he reassures you, giving you time to adjust.
you nod when you feel ready for him to keep going and he bottoms out with a strangled moan. “you’re unreal, you know that?”
his praise pulls a giggle from your throat but it quickly turns into a breathy sigh when he starts moving.
he starts off slow, but soon enough you’re both lost in the moment and his pace picks up. within the next few minutes, his room is filled with sounds of pleasure and sweet words exchanged between lovers.
“you’re perfect,” he says, angling his lips closer to your ear. his hips stutter when you clamp around him at his words.
his thrusts reach deep enough to get you crying out for him. “tetsu, faster! please!”
“ah- there’s a good girl, love hearing you beg for more.” he nibbles the spot just below your ear, soothing it with his tongue.
“I love you,” you whimper, nails digging into his shoulders.
kuroo groans at the sensation and goes a bit harder. “you needed this just as bad as I did, hm? it’s okay, I’ve got you now, pretty girl. just relax.”
you hide your face in his neck and try to stifle your moans, but he doesn’t appreciate that one bit. “stop that, let me hear you,” he commands and you immediately pull your head back.
he grins down at you and kisses your nose. “sound so pretty when you’re falling apart on my cock, you know better than to hide those noises from me.”
you nod and find yourself unable to look away from his face, as if you were in a trance. he’s absolutely gorgeous on top of you- why would you want to look away?
“you close, baby?” he asks after your walls tighten even more.
“mmhm,” you whimper and lean up for a kiss.
“me too,” he whispers and tugs one of your hands away from his shoulder. he intertwines your fingers and presses is above your head against the pillow. “needed this just as badly as I did, hm? it’s okay, I’ve got you, baby.”
doing so good for me.
you’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen.
you feel so fucking good, princess.
all of his praise sent shockwaves throughout your body and soon enough you’re tipping over the edge. your back is arched, head thrown back and a loud cry of his name is drawn from you as you cum for the second time.
he follows soon after and you feel his whole body shudder when he spills into his condom.
your breaths mix together as you both come down from your highs. it’s quiet for a few moments before he carefully pulls out and disposes of the soiled contraceptive in the trash next to his bed. he rolls back into bed, facing you.
he strokes your cheek with his knuckles and smiles at you when you open your eyes and turn to face him as well. “hi pretty girl, you okay?”
you take a deep breath and curl into his chest. you still feel slightly too light and any thoughts not related to him are muddled. you’re overcome with an intense wave of affection for him.
he must notice, because when you manage to peek up at him again, he snorts. “yeah, I don’t know what I was expecting.”
he knows better than to try and leave the bed right away (memories of you whining and clinging to him when he did attempt it early on in your relationship flash through his mind and he smiles), so instead he wraps his arms around you and presses kisses to your hairline.
you savour the familiar feeling of being wrapped in his arms and nuzzle into his bare chest. the most comfortable feeling in the world.
eventually he does get up to grab a damp cloth and some water, and he informs you that you can use his bathroom for whatever you need.
you’re both following the same routine you had when you were together as if you hadn’t broken up at all.
now that you’ve regained some clarity, you start to worry about what exactly that means.
you’ve both admitted to missing each other like crazy, but you assume you’ll need to have a serious conversation with kuroo about whether or not you should get back together.
you ponder over this on his bed for a bit longer before he interrupts your thoughts. “we don’t have to talk about it right now,” he starts. “we can talk about it tomorrow morning if you would prefer, but…”
he pauses like he’s not sure if he should continue. you nod encouragingly, curious as to where this is going (thought you think you know). “but I meant absolutely everything I said tonight. um, before and while we were… uh. busy.”
you giggle a little at his shy demeanour before considering the weight of his words. “we could talk about it tomorrow morning, but I think we both already know what we want from this right?”
he doesn’t need to nod, but he does anyway. “I definitely have an answer already.”
you knock your forehead against his. “so… are we officially back together then?”
he offers you the widest grin he’s thrown your way all night. “I think we are, sweetheart. We’ll make it work this time, I promise.”
“I promise,” you repeat.
the rest of the night is spent cuddling under covers, sharing kisses and secrets you’ve missed out on sharing these past few months.
“I love you,” you say, before you finally drift off for the night.
you don’t hear him, but he’s quick to return the sentiment. “I love you too.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
BONUS:
the following morning, you wake up to your phone ringing. you groan when you see it’s your friend and realize you never texted her back last night to tell her you’re okay.
you look over at kuroo, still sound asleep beside you, and answer as quietly as possible. “hello?”
“oh thank goodness you’re alright, why weren’t you picking up? we all called you a million times!”
you check and see a ton of missed calls from more of your friends who saw you leave the party last night. “I’m sorry, I was asleep,” you say sincerely, only twisting the truth a little bit.
you feel slightly bad about it, you mentally promise her to tell her everything later.
before she can respond, your boyfriend sits up (when did he even wake up?) and says into the phone, “sorry, it’s my fault. but I promise I took good care of her,” he smirks at you.
you flinch when she shrieks into your ear. “YOU WERE WITH KUROO?!”
glaring at him, he snickers and takes the phone from you. “she’ll call you back later, we’re still catching up.”
“no, wait-“ he hangs up the phone and tosses it onto his sheets.
you pout at him. “tetsu, c’mon.”
he kisses your cheek. “I really didn’t meant for it to come off as rude, I swear. I just wanted a relaxing morning with you before you have to leave.”
you sigh and fall back into the soft comfort of his pillows. “it’s okay,” you say. “I really didn’t feel like giving her the rundown first thing in the morning, anyway. you really tired me out last night,” you peer up at him.
he laughs. “oh really? we’ve gotta build up your stamina again, pretty girl. I wasn’t lying-“ he crawls over and hovers a few inches above you. “we still have a lot of catching up to do.”
you mentally pat yourself on the back for answering his texts. definitely not your worst idea.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I swear I’ll get better at writing smut, folks 🫡
but for my first time writing it, I don’t think it’s horrible. if the ending feels a bit rushed, it’s because I’ve literally had this sitting in my drafts since miss olivia rodrigo released the music video for this song last august and I wanted it out 🙃.
tagging @nyctophilicroses bc I remember you commented on the original post I made asking abt exes to lovers with kuroo 🥹
660 notes · View notes
szkunas · 5 months ago
Text
FLAGS EVERYWHERE. ୨ৎ are jjk women green, beige or red flags?ㅤheadcanons
featuring ♰ㅤmultiple. (mai, maki, nobara, shoko, yuki, yorozu) + honorable non-binary, uraume.
warning(s)! ♰ㅤNO PRONOUNS AND ANATOMY FOR READER. SFW (?) — toxic behavior ! cheating ! breaking-up mentions ! very much made based on personal opinions + i tried to write the characters off as canon as possible, but my favoritism will probably show ! violence + blood + death (mentions) ! cannibalism (mentions) ! angst (some) ! some are implied yandere ! not really all dark content but i will tag as so just to be sure, some of them are dc vibes ! yorozu is a massive warning ! sukuna mentions ! mentions of marriage + forced arrange marriage !
Tumblr media
୨୧ MAI ZENIN — green / beige flag.
surprisingly good, once you get past the barriers.
despite what it initially seems like Mai is a heartless bully, she is not as cruel as people think.
BIGGEST RED FLAG? emotional barriers and selfishness.
initially, it is very difficult to get past mai's irritable temperament. she is provocative, and has a certain mischievous aspect to most things. at first glance, she's a bad girl like some character from a 2000s movie. still, once you get past that rough layer and get to what's underneath, you'll see that her heart is soft and very pure. she wasn't open to love, but your arrival could definitely change the course of her thoughts on the matter.
the selfishness part is not as prominent. mai alternates between being very selfish and being very selfless. it's a strange combination, but the way she grew up and was raised in the zenin house made her very defensive and not very open. it's a problem, but not incorrigible.
DO YOU NEED TO BE A SORCERER?
the answer is: no, but it is preferable that you are. most life has always been and will be about sorcery. this is the world she was born into, and she will die in it, whether she wants to or not. with so little energy that she could only create one bullet a day, she became more accustomed to the prospect that the people around her would, by nature, be better and stronger. it's a rotten feeling, and it fills her with envy in an almost insurmountable way. the sensation is worse when it comes to her sister. that would extend to you, and regardless of your strength, she thinks it would be more acceptable for you to be a sorcerer.
still, if you're not a sorcerer, there is a certain beauty to it. for her, it was unacceptable, but a lot of you made her see the actions and prohibitions of her clan with different eyes. not that she likes the place very much, but we are a product of the environment in which we were raised, and let's face it. no one finds the zenin house pleasant. if you are not a sorcerer, she relaxes even more in the face of the normality that surrounds your relationship. simply, no more worrying about debates and curses, about big clans and politics. just cute dates where she buys you a coffee and says it was because she had money left over (she likes to buy you things.)
WOULD SHE CHEAT ON YOU?
absolutely not. mai grew up watching the men in her family commit adultery in the rooms of the house and the women filling themselves with drink and medicine to endure it all. she doesn't intend to become that woman or allow that to be the kind of person you become, either. your relationship faces many problems, but after the initial stages, she becomes motivated to become a better person, for you. to give you what you deserve, the best version of herself.
OTHER OBSERVATIONS.
something very difficult to ignore in your relationship is the zenin clan itself. like every young woman, mai faces a dangerous fate ahead of her. after maki left the clan behind, this ended up reinforcing expectations of her, which include marrying and having many children with a sorcerer that the zenin will choose. it is the fate that every young woman in a clan must be content with, because demanding humanity in jujutsu and clan zenin as a woman is unthinkable. still, she didn't think much about it. it's the kind of thing you avoid thinking about because it gets on your nerves.
however, after you started dating and when she realized that she really loved you, it started giving her nightmares. her fear of what the clan would do to you if they found out is surreal. she knows you could never be together under normal circumstances, they wouldn't allow it. her collar seems tighter every day, and in desperation, sometimes she hides money under her mattress, thinking that maybe one day, she can run away with you. maybe one day, when fate is knocking at her door, mai will be forced to run away with you.
she didn't fight for her freedom on her own, not after maki left. the spiteful thought of her sister leaving her behind rather than staying at rock bottom with her still haunts her. sometimes she holds your hand a little tight while she watches you sleep. she wonders, if she asked, would you be at rock bottom with her, instead of wanting something better? it is selfish of her to think that.
maki is also a delicate situation. all of mai's family has some issues with her, but her twin sister is a special case. even though she loves maki, she feels constant envy and has a huge problem comparing herself to her. it gets worse if you know maki personally. sometimes mai gets so paranoid that she thinks you would choose maki over her. just the idea hurts.
୨୧ MAKI ZENIN — green flag.
isolating, barely communicating, but she tries her best and we love her for it.
everyone's favorite restricted (sorry, toji) is actually a better girlfriend than people think.
BIGGEST RED FLAG? emotional barriers and distancing.
very similar to her sister, maki is very used to not letting people into her heart. she is seen as harsh, strong and very scary, even by those closest to her (panda, toge, yuta, etc). but just like the folks in jujutsu high, she might warm up to you and allow a glance through her defenses.
the hardest thing to deal with in maki is not her temper — but her habits. she's used to doing things for herself, whether it's wielding a weapon or finishing dinner because someone burned it down. her habits are very strong and as difficult to break as her emotional walls, which are there so she can avoid getting attached to you and getting hurt because of it. but, again, nothing incorrigible. be patient, and she'll open up.
DO YOU NEED TO BE A SORCERER?
in my opinion, not really. it would be okay if you were one — being more able to defend yourself and all —, but it honestly does not matter to maki. not one bit.
out of all people, she couldn't care less about someone's cursed energy or technique, because she understands strength comes from various sources. she is a varied source. she would find it okay if you were or weren't, too.
WOULD SHE CHEAT ON YOU?
never, ever. sincerely, maki is the type of guardian friend that keeps this behavior as a girlfriend. if someone is flirting with her, she normally gets upset enough — but while in a relationship with you? oh, it makes her nearly able to commit a murder or two. like, c'mon. can't they see the ring? her arm wrapped around your waist? the way she keeps trying to pull you closer, to have you hanging over her as near as possible?
are they blind?
OTHER OBSERVATIONS.
honestly, almost everything with maki is extremely indirect or just hinted towards. if you notice the little signs, you can easily tell how much she cares, even before your relationship officially begins. how much she insists you take coats when it's cold, or the way she's started to conveniently take sweets and small snacks that you like with her. little things like that.
she is more vulnerable than she would like to admit. especially after shibuya where she was burned alive and had to wonder if you were still out there, alive. the scars not only marked her body, but her mind as well. it has changed in many ways since the beginning of the year. you understanding that and understanding her, supporting her, is just one of the reasons why she loves you.
she's extremely perceptive, so don't even think she won't notice something. even when she's not watching you like a hawk, maki can notice small things easily. did you change your hair? she'll be the first to notice. are you not eating much and seem a little sick? she will ask what is wrong. have you bought any new clothes, even if they look like ones you already have? she says it will look great with one of her coats.
maki is a little overprotective, but only at first. she also understands if you need space or time to yourself. she is possessive, but not in the crazy way.
her most striking trait in the relationship is how unafraid she is to say that you are together. she's very proud — of you, and of being with you. and maki isn't shy about telling anyone that, or kicking the ass of anyone who doubts or makes you doubt yourself. yeah, she's your girlfriend. everyone unhappy with it can go to hell.
୨୧ NOBARA KUGISAKI — green flag.
a girlfriend who is certainly very passionate and happy, nobara is a chaotic one to deal with. but once you're settled with that? oh, you're on.
BIGGEST RED FLAG? she is extremely passionate. about everything.
not that much of a red flag, honestly, but it can be a handful. if you are a more calm and centered person, you may have problems with this nature initially. nobara is very instinctive, sincere and not afraid to say what she thinks. she loves fashion, she loves fighting, she loves feeling beautiful — sometimes the amount of things she does, and the most dangerous ones, become overwhelming.
of course, her passion also extends to you. her loved one, her amazing (she makes a point of mentioning) significant other. it is not a bad thing on it’s own, but sometimes nobara can be very adamant about you staying away from dangerous matters (most part of her life), or trying to scare someone away.
despite that, she truly loves you, and nobara is proud of saying it out loud. and poor is the soul of megumi fushiguro, paying for his lost best (that itadori would get a girlfriend before her) when she introduces you.
DO YOU NEED TO BE A SORCERER?
honestly, no, but it's preferable that you are. nobara grew up in a small town that she came to hate, taught by her grandmother how to use jujutsu before entering jujutsu high. it's a super inspiring, motivating background, depending on the angle you look at it, but difficult to explain to the person you're flirting with if they know nothing about jujutsu.
nothing that matters that much, but she feels she would be more understood if you were a sorcerer — bonus points if you're not from a clan or anything. just raised from difficulties and mundane in everything else, like her.
WOULD SHE CHEAT ON YOU?
no. that's, simply it. nope. nuh uh. no way in hell. not in a million years.
if any idiot is flirting with her insistently, she'll be tempted to hit them with a hammer. cheaters and idiots get a bonk!
you and her only get love, though.
OTHER OBSERVATIONS.
nobara is a girl of steel, but she loves to be feminine and sometimes even fragile (not that those two things are related). she valuates anything that seems truthful and supportive to her — being it carrying her bags for her or hold her while she watches a movie, or killing bugs for her. simple things build even more trust and affection for you.
she's clingy, even though she won't admit it. total little spoon, who loves being carried and treated as a princess. in exchange, she'll give you the royal treatment as well. the type that yells yes! im their girlfriend! suck on that! proudly after you achieve something.
are you permanently invited to movie nights, shopping trips and her small walks around the town. and she is more patient with you, in case you are taking her things and end up dropping them.
she gives advice, speaking openly and honestly what she thinks, and doesn't hide opinions, but she's a great listener, as well. nobara is always ready to be at your side in whichever you might need — offering her shoulder for you to cry on or asking if she should get her hammer.
୨୧ SHOKO IERI — green flag.
probably really biased, but i think shoko is the best option on the list. you’ll see why.
the exhausted, smoking doctor we all love. why not find true happiness while listening to I don’t smoke and holding a pretty woman’s hand, right?
BIGGEST RED FLAG? she is hot and cold. distant and clingy.
being the third person in a trio can be quite distressing. not that shoko doesn’t value the friendship she has with satoru, far from it, but sometimes she feels very left out. as if the world was only about satoru gojo and suguru geto and their damn moral problems. it’s irritating, to think that gojo isolates himself from her when she’s right there, always has been.
for this reason, and because she doesn’t have many other friends, and none in the non-jujutsu sphere, shoko alternates between two defense mechanisms against abandonment. it’s one of the things she most despises and scares, and she can either acquire a calm and distant nature or one that’s clingier and even more affectionate than normal, afraid of you leaving her. surprisingly, you can handle this easily — just be honest about what you feel, how you do not like this behavior. she will listen the wake-up call.
once that is handled, and you express your feelings about it, she starts therapy to aid her keep the relationship. you’re something she refuses to lose.
DO YOU NEED TO BE A SORCERER?
no, not really. a small part of hers might prefer you aren’t. shoko lived as a doctor and a valuable healer in the jujutsu world. devoid of technique, but skilled with reverse energy, she is essential to the jujutsu school. her friends and technically, family, are all sorcerers, or those who aren’t, come into contact with jujutsu in some way (usually unpleasant, like yuta okkotsu and itadori yuji).
the idea of having a non-sorcerer partner, but one who is unaffected by these horrors and the knowledge that there is something more than normality, is an attractive idea. normality and simplicity would be good for her, but frankly it doesn’t matter. if you were not a sorcerer, she wouldn’t introduce any of the jujutsu to you initially, afraid of you getting hurt. however, opinions from friends (thanks, nanami) can change her mind — and while it’s complicated to resolve a fight over your girlfriend lying for so long, it would be even worse if she lived a lie forever.
WOULD SHE CHEAT ON YOU?
not. a. single. chance. simple and easy.
OTHER OBSERVATIONS.
shoko is a very skilled healer, and there are a lot of people depending on her every day. it weighs on her shoulders like an anchor sometimes. this weight can lead her to isolate and withdraw, and experience anxiety or depression. many sorcerers or anyone involved in jujutsu go through difficult periods constantly. you need to know when your girlfriend’s distance means “i want space” or if she’s desperate to be saved. it can be quite exhausting.
shoko has many self-destructive tendencies. smoking itself is a great example. even though she heals her lungs with reverse cursed energy she will hurt them even more later. she is more delicate than she looks.
during much of her life, shoko adopted the role of caregiver. a doctor, nurse, coroner and multiple other things, she is everyone’s supportive friend, even if no one comes to her rescue when she needs help. being with you makes her show this nature often, initially hiding it when she’s feeling bad so as not to worry you. however, by understanding how serious she is about being with you, she allows herself to lean on you and encourages you to lean on her. together, united, so that one does not overload the other.
she has problems, like everyone else, but most of them disappear after an honest conversation or when she herself realizes her own flaws and encourages herself to become better.
୨୧ URAUME — beige / red flag.
much like a man being invited to ladies night, uraume is not a woman. but i will write them here for convenience.
one of the greatest traits of uraume that everyone knows is that they are very loyal. unfortunately, this only applies if your name is sukuna ryomen. otherwise? ehhhh...
BIGGEST RED FLAG? devoted to sukuna.
let’s face it, no one who is so loyal to a cannibal can be considered trustworthy. sukuna is a cruel and unscrupulous man, and uraume is undeniably his right-hand. they are the cause of pain and suffering that spread through decades. they accept the kind of behavior sukuna exposes, and they might even encourage it, at some rate. this is not something to wish for in a relationship.
besides, you will always be the number two in uraume’s life. they swore loyalty to sukuna, they will follow through it until death.
DO YOU NEED TO BE A SORCERER?
not really. it is difficult portraying uraume with anyone in general — much less a non-sorcerer. but i honestly think that uraume is their own person, and even though they are someone who is reserved, they have their own taste in personality above power or strength. it's one of the reasons they admire sukuna, of course, but surprisingly, i can see them not dating a sorcerer.
although, if you are not a sorcerer, prepare for one hell of a ride. sukuna will torture you for fun, and uraume will allow it.
WOULD THEY CHEAT ON YOU?
no, i think. but because a very specific thought hits me. for example, i can’t see sukuna and uraume having anything sexual or romantic in any shape or way. with him so uninterested in all of that, there’s not really any options for them to cheat you on with. but, i suppose it can be said they would, if uraume could get with sukuna.
you can make your own judgment about this one, though.
OTHER OBSERVATIONS.
being with uraume means making sacrifices and accepting that, yes, you are important, but you will never come first. as already mentioned, you are permanently stuck in the “second priority of uraume” position, because sukuna exists. and even if he hadn’t been resurrected yet. from the moment uraume woke up in a new body, their goal has always been clear: to bring their master back and serve him in the best way possible.
it’s possible that sukuna will use you to mess with uraume. this could mean several things. clearly the king of curses has a respect for his most devoted servant, but that doesn’t stop him from getting bored. uraume’s loyalty was never put to the test before you showed up, and it will be one day. in case uraume deserves some punishment, when sukuna tortures you and uses reverse energy. heal to hurt, only to start all over again. uraume watches, impassive and cold as the ice they produce, and will confess privately that it was one of the worst experiences of his life. but they will never lift a hand against their master. uraume will fight anyone to protect you, except if the attacker is sukuna.
be prepared to stand alongside the greatest accomplice to ever walk the earth. uraume knows the consequences and the harm that sukuna brings, but they don’t care, they won’t stop him. beyond morality, uraume’s loyalty cannot be broken, not even by you. in a way, you will also become an accomplice.
୨୧ YUKI TSUKUMO — green / beige flag.
BIGGEST RED FLAG? distant (physicially).
yuki has a reputation that precedes her in the jujutsu world: the special-grade sorceress who refuses all missions, takes payment anyway, and uses the money to travel. you constantly receive souvenirs, souvenirs, and gifts from the other side of the world, but nothing will compensate for your girlfriend’s affection in the form of a warm hug.
she constantly tries to bring you with her, but it can all be very overwhelming to you. new cultures, languages you do not speak, people side eyeing you. besides, you can’t, because of work and other matters. the idea of being financially dependent on yuki is very scary. since without her, you would easily be on the other side of the world, without money. obviously, she would never leave you in that situation, but it’s an idea that runs through anyone’s head.
DO YOU NEED TO BE A SORCERER?
honestly, i am tempted to say yes, because having a non-sorcerer partner goes against much of what she shows herself to be interested in, but yuki is a very kind and determined person who is not afraid to speak her mind and go after what she wants. she will tell you what type of guy he is as easily as she would flirt with you if she were interested.
despite that, i think it does not matter to her, honestly.
WOULD SHE CHEAT ON YOU?
that's a very easy assumption to make, seeing as you haven't seen yuki for endless months and both you and she need relief (emotional and sexual) eventually. however, contrary to what many believe, no. she wouldn't cheat.
OTHER OBSERVATIONS.
no matter how passionate and well-intentioned yuki is, she will rarely be able to truly be present. video calls and daily calls don’t really satisfy any of you ── that’s when they’re possible, thanks to the time difference. it’s easy to understand how a relationship like this can become unbearable and even unsustainable after a while.
yuki is very busy, so even when she is back from her long and time-consuming trips, she won’t have one hundred percent of her time to dedicate to you. meetings, research, more scolding from society’s superiors. little time for motorcycle rides and cuddles, if you ask her.
looking at the big picture, yuki would be a great girlfriend if she just made a little more time to spend with you and try new things together ── instead of trying things out and then telling you everything in a video call at four o’clock in the morning.
୨୧ YOROZU — red flag.
BIGGEST RED FLAG? she is yorozu. just kidding. devoted to sukuna.
yorozu is a complicated case. she has few redeeming qualities, but you can understand that she is an attractive, intelligent and, in a way, powerful woman. knowing chemistry and physics before those concepts were properly delved into, she discovered new things to her power. but she is simply unbearable in one aspect: her determination in relation to sukuna ryomen.
this determination makes yorozu’s life goal become to kill and marry sukuna. it’s even impressive that she found a partner, and she makes that very clear. does the opportunity arise? well, you’re not important anymore.
DO YOU NEED TO BE A SORCERER?
i think so, but that's a more personal view. yorozu seems more attracted to power than to the sukuna's personality aspect itself, which demonstrates that what attracts her to a person is raw and pure power. considering the time she came from and her traditional ways, this would be, for her, related to cursed energy. so yes.
WOULD SHE CHEAT ON YOU?
if you consider the whole thing with sukuna. and that she would cheat on you with sukuna. even if there is no one else for her besides the two of you, between you and him, she wouldn't choose you.
OTHER OBSERVATIONS.
frankly, yorozu’s part is very short because she appears in about six chapters, causes chaos, fights and dies. also, i think her character has a lot of potential and little use, but trying anyway. yorozu is extremely determined to have what she wants, a woman who wouldn’t give up for anything in the world. if on the one hand, this is positive ── she doesn’t give up on her relationship ── it is also negative. she won’t give up her search for the king of curses’ heart, even if she has to rip it from his chest.
it’s exhausting knowing that, in some ways, you’re a replacement for what yorozu can’t truly have. it’s hard to say whether pure and true love really matters to her, as yorozu has her own specific and disturbed views on love. it is likely that she will not be loving in the relationship at all, and will manipulate you in order to keep you with her.
yorozu has a goal and the means to achieve it. once she gets close enough, she knows her presence will be more of a hindrance than a help. she entered the relationship with you with the mindset that one day, she would have to get rid of you. but a part of her heart warms. yorozu wants to do it herself. no henchmen, no tricks. just her and you at her end ── which must be worthy and brought only by her. with her, you’re likely to end up stabbed in the heart, while she looks into your eyes and presses her lips against hers one last time, tasting the blood. this is her goodbye to you, before she leaves for her true love.
Tumblr media
ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE. I APOLOGIZE FOR ANY MISTAKES. thank you for reading! <3
434 notes · View notes