#all in all a good evening. going to take my cold tea and snack and then go to bed.
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drabblejester ¡ 17 hours ago
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Dan Heng, Sampo, Gepard, Ratio and Mr Reca react that reader has a chaotic little sister like Klee from genshin impact
how VARIOUS HSR GUYS would react to your SUPER COOL BUT MILDLY INSANE LITTLE SISTER!!
requested by: gachaclubideas !!
pairings: dan heng, sampo, gepard, ratio, and mr reca & gn!reader and little sister :3
content warnings: none!!
comments: the first post after brief hiatus is chaotic.. as god intended<3
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GEPARD:
ouuh he LOVES her!!! doesn’t like how crazy she is though. but still loves her
goes and pinches her cheeks like a grandma and gets scared because she growled at him (“whys she in timeout?” “because she growled at me” reference)
tells her some lovely stories about all of his cool adventures only to find out that she REALLY wants to go on those adventures too
you just kinda laugh it off until she comes back with a diy cardboard suit of armor just like gepards…. okay now youre debating on letting her go or not
gepard just sits her down and talks about it, telling her why she cant go on Death Expedition Number Three Thousand. she gets upset so he bakes her some cookies or fixes her a snack. hurray! peace restored <3
SAMPO:
and unlike gepard, he will HAPPILY treat her to crazy explorations and little ‘quests’ he makes up.
they’re either just a way to get your sister to do work for him OR genuinely for fun. no matter what, he makes sure that she’s safe and sound and tucked into bed at 9 pm
constantly talks to you about how GREAT of a fool she would grow up to be.. indoctrinating elation early. he’s good at it too… you’re a bit worried that she’s going to end up even crazier if she does wind up to be a fool
eeeeeh but she knocks out too early to do anything TOO crazy. nearly 99% of the time after sampo and her come back from their adventures, shes knocked out on his shoulder FAST asleep.
at least you can sleep at night knowing mr cold feet has your little sister in (somewhat) good hands, albeit probably a terrible influence on her.
DAN HENG:
he’s scared. he’s genuinely scared at first. it’s like having a miniature and even WORSE version of caelus or stelle in the express
and he’s vowed to never let her end up like those little trash-eating baseball-wielding raccoon dweebs… so the first thing he does is teach her some manners!
they have a LOT of tea parties, and he uses it as an excuse to teach her basic manners and polite words. and she does learn well!
sadly it comes at the cost of him coming out of the room in a pretty pink dress and makeup and so much glitter. he’s even got stickers on his tail that he can’t reach far enough to get off
you and march take SO many photos. damn the lessons, you just think its funny that he comes out as a new princess every time
DR. RATIO:
he also tries the approach that dan heng has, aka teaching her some manners and such. she learns well from him, but constantly calls him a cranky old man. much to your amusement
he gets annoyed and overwhelmed by her very very easily, so its hardly 10 minutes before he’s handing her off to you again.
don’t get me wrong, he doesn’t think that she’s a lost cause or anything. he just doesn’t do too well with hyper kids, and doesn’t really know how to fix that
he tries a new method, bribery! giving her a small piece of fruit every time she gets a question right. which goes very well! at first!
eventually your little sister is begging to go to ratio because he has yummy fruits, and ratio is begging you to NOT hand her over because she will terrorize him (you hand her over)
MR. RECA:
dear GOD he loves her. adores her so much. kisses her cheeks and pats her head so very much its like he was MADE to work with kids
his energy and her energy work surprisingly well together? much more than you expected. he’s frantically taking photos of her in cute little outfits and in the most insane voice hes like “yes.. YES.. MY LITTLE ACTRESS!! MY DARLING SUPERSTAR!!! YOU’LL CRUSH THE WORLD SOMEDAY!!!!”
it’s kinda concerning now that you think about it because they enable each other SO hard. they’re both hyper maniacs who love doing things! which is cute until you think about it for more than 3 seconds
she gets to feature in so so many productions (with your consent), even playing a major role as a super cool villain. she loves it so much that she refuses to get rid of the costume, which now sits proudly in her closet
after each film, he showers her with love and praise and treats her to a little bit of ice cream. you lecture reca about sugar, and he winds up going the veggie route. your baby sister now refuses to work with him </3
apolocheese for the absence my lieges
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onepiexe ¡ 1 year ago
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the 'not' date went well :)
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elexaria ¡ 10 months ago
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dating simon riley wasn’t always easy. “i’m a bloody nutcase, eh?” he’d joke when he’d wake up in a cold sweat, taking deep breaths as his calloused thumb rasps against the soft cotton bedsheets, grounding him back to reality. “puts all my efforts to shame when i wake up like this. fuck’s sake.”
therapy is mandatory, especially given his role as lieutenant. the traumas of childhood, the torture. he thinks he’s good at dealing with his problems, thinks therapy is a waste of time. “what, it’s just a bloke sat there starin’ at me? hell, get me a piece of paper with some made up degree on it and even i could be a therapist.” he grumbles after you point out that, in fact, he’s not as good as coping with his trauma as he thinks he is.
“you need to actually give this a go, si. it’s..” you pause, biting the inside of your lip as you make breakfast. his hair is disheveled, wry strands of grey sticking up against the grain. his dark circles only exemplify just how tired he is, especially when he has his night terrors. you shake your head, sighing as you crack another egg into the frying pan. “how can i expect you to stay safe out there when you’re barely able to look after yourself when you’re home?” you sigh out as he grunts, taking a seat at the small dining table, his eyes skimming through the morning paper.
god, he’s such a stubborn bastard. it takes months to get him to at least consider finding a new therapist, to get him to actually care about his mental health. christ, if he can’t do it for himself, can’t he at least try for your sake?
and then, it’s like he has a lightbulb moment. you come home after a long day at work, only to find him sat at the dining table, writing scruffy notes in a ring bound notebook. “mission notes?” you ask curiously, keeping your eye on him as you make yourself a cup of tea. he grunts, shaking his head as he continues to write.
“it’s a diary. supposed to help with your mental health or summet.” he replies, settling his pen down to meet your gaze. you must have had a look of confusion on your face, and it makes the corners of his lips twitch up into a half-smile. “yeah, i know. a bloke like me with a diary, like i’m a bloody teenage girl.” he quips, now grinning as his fingers toy with the corners of the notebook. “writin’ about all the boys i fancy on the field.” he shoots a wink, before continuing to write some more in his notebook.
it’s actually surprising, a smile on your lips as you watch him in his own little world, actually making an effort in his mental health recovery. you come over, settling a warm cup of tea by him before pressing a gentle kiss to the crown of his head, still smiling as you make your way upstairs to give him some privacy. he comes upstairs after half an hour, chucking the diary into his bedside table drawer before sprawling out onto the bed obnoxiously with a deafening groan. you whine and complain when he purposely stretches on you, gently crushing you with his bolder-esque shoulders with a massive grin on his face.
there were still bad days, though. days where he’d hide himself in the garage to work on some of his projects. but you’re both trying, he feels his heart break when you gently knock on the door, holding a plate of snacks and a cup of tea for him, and fuck, it makes his bad day slightly better.
that evening, he curls up besides you silently on the couch, his journal and pen in hand as he clears his throat. you curiously peer down as he begins to flick through the pages of chicken scratch, gently tapping the page as he looks up at you. he clears his throat, and begins to read out the sweetest paragraph, one that makes your eyes well up with tears.
“no idea where i would be without you, love. you make the darkest days of my life brighter than ever. you make life worth it.” he ends his speech , the timbre of his voice cracking with emotion as he looks at you. and right there, you know that through all the trials and tribulations you two will go through, you’re the love of simon riley’s life and he would never let you forget that.
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goldenstring6123 ¡ 3 months ago
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https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTNXxJ8TM/
THIS IS SO CUTE PLS I CAN SO CLEARLY SEE THE LADS MEN DOING THIS 😭 and the comment section had me dying where is evb finding these MEN 😔🙏
Lnds: Sleepy time!
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Warning: No warnings, afab!reader, fem!reader
Authors note: Fluff (not a lot of it) and a bit of domestic stuff.
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Sylus:
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It had been 30 minutes since you left the bedroom. Sylus was already well on his side of the mattress, reading the news while waiting for you to come back. He thought you were just up and about doing your normal routine of drinking herbal tea and doing skincare, but it was taking you far longer than usual.
He settled the tablet down on the nightstand and walked out of the bedroom. He searched for you in every room he passed by, and when he arrived at the guest bedroom at the end of the hall, there you were, perfectly tucked in under the unused duvet.
You were curled into a ball and too engrossed in the video you were watching; you didn't even notice the black fuzzy threads wrapping around your weird curled-up position. You lifted off from the bed, and when you came to, the view was of Sylus' back as you involuntarily made your way back to his bedroom.
"So you're not going to put me down?" you asked, paying attention to the video again. "Are manners not a thing anymore?"
The brooding man didn't spare you a glance. "I'm not open for discussion. You're supposed to sleep in my bedroom. Our bedroom."
"I just wanted a bed all to myself," you uttered. Here you were, planning what to watch and what to eat for the whole night, and this guy managed to foil it.
"I don't share the same sentiment, sweetie. You have the bed every time I'm overseas on a work trip. It's even infested with your colorful pillows," he opened the door to the bedroom and reeled you in, gesturing to your side of the bed which had vibrant pillows and bed 'pets,' as you like to refer to them.
"You really can't sleep without me, can you, Mr. Big guy? Afraid that someone's under the bed or something?"
"I'm more afraid that you're going to ravage my food pantry when you're not in my line of sight."
"The guest bedroom is nowhere near the pantry and I don't ravage it—I simply take a few snacks," you clarified. "Greg would be sad if the food spoils."
"Either way, you sleep in my bedroom or my couch, nowhere else, sweetie."
"Admit it: You like my company, don't you?" You gave him a cheeky grin.
"Yes, yes," Sylus agreed sarcastically, rolling his eyes. "You make a good meat shield when we get attacked in this bedroom."
"Oh wow. Reduced to a shield." You rolled your eyes in return and slipped under the covers. "That's Onychinus' leader for you."
"Right. Are you done now? I still have an early schedule for tomorrow."
"Alright, alright. I'm heading to bed now. You can sleep."
"Good. Now come here." Sylus opened his arms and you found yourself huddled right into it like it was the perfect mold. You shifted a bit and could feel his muscles relax against your back.
"Why did you feel the need to sleep in the guest room tonight?" Sylus asked under his breath.
"I was planning on reading comics all night. Tara recommended a new romance comic which I like, but knowing you, you'd probably take my phone away."
"Then it looks like I will be the bad guy tonight."
"Maybe. Until you fall asleep." You shrugged.
You hear the handcuffs being pulled out.
Shit.
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Xavier:
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3:02 AM, it says on the clock. You weren't on the bed. It was cold and it was proof that you never went on it, which was odd considering you told sleepy little Xavier that you were going to stay over. Poor little tired hunter was exhausted after a day's work and couldn't help but doze off while watching you do your little night ritual of moisturizing and doing a facemask.
Xavier sat on the side of the bed, letting out a big yawn. He didn't know where you were, but all he knew was that he didn't like being alone. From his palm, a faint whirlpool of light emanated, enough to guide him through his dark abode. His first thought was maybe you were watching in the living room. You weren't there. He then headed to the small bedroom right beside his, a spare one for guests, but it went unused when you both shared the same bed now.
He tried his best to quietly open the door. There he saw a little bump on the mattress and it made his heart squeeze; you were adorable and looked so small. Xavier tiptoed and folded the blanket away from you. He took a deep breath and lifted you up bridal style, pressing you against his chest.
"hm?…Xavier?" you slurred, vision dark and blurry.
"I'm moving you to our bedroom," he kissed the top of your head and continued his journey to the other room.
"You were sleeping," you paused, looking for the word. The drowsiness didn't seem to go away. "didn't want to…disturb you."
Xavier wanted to say something, but he and you both arrived at the side of the bed. He gently laid you down and placed a pillow between your limbs, which you automatically hugged. Xavier crawled to his side of the bed and yanked the cover over the both of you. Though you both weren't exactly touching, the little hunter's heart eased at your presence.
Gladly, he went back to sleep, hoping to maybe see you in his dreams.
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Zayne:
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Zayne's house was far too quiet when he arrived. It was only 7 o'clock, and by then you'd usually be in the kitchen, peeking your head out with a ladle in hand. There was no "welcome back" nor a simple "hello," but what did he expect? You were mad at him.
It's a shallow fight, really. Zayne decided to put you on alcohol time-out and took your hidden beers that you were so ready to drink after a grueling day at work. Zayne's judgment was far better than yours because when you get drunk beyond mental capacity, you tend to make a mess of the house, and you turn into a rage-filled, feisty lady. Moreover, you'd been chain-drinking for the whole week, and Zayne was getting concerned because you kept having hangovers.
His hands twisted on the knob to the little library of his house, where he would always find you on nights like these. There you were, curled in the lazy boy sofa and turned away from him. You were awake, but you didn't want to look at your lover.
"I'm home," Zayne declared.
"Dinner's in the fridge. Heat it up," you responded and closed your eyes. Zayne's footsteps grew closer and closer to you, and you felt his palm land on your shoulder.
"Your back will hurt if you sleep in that position."
The sofa might look soft and admittedly it's pretty comfortable to sit on for a long period of time, but with the curled-up position you have, it was bound to hurt when you fall asleep.
"I'm perfectly fine," you replied.
"Don't be stubborn." Zayne decided to pick you up. You wanted to thrash and get out of his grasp, but then you would look childish.
"I don't want to be with you tonight."
Zayne kept his lips in a thin line. He's more than aware that you're saying that because you're mad, but still—It hurts to hear it from you.
Gently, Zayne settled you in the middle of the bed. "I'll sleep in the living room. Stay here," he whispered and tucked the blanket over your shoulders. It was dark in the bedroom, so you couldn't exactly see him. You rolled over to face away from your lover and patiently waited for him to leave.
1:34 AM. You couldn't sleep. A can of beer would do you some good, but your tongue wasn't craving the bitterness of it. Instead, your mind looped over to a few hours ago when you said something that you didn't mean. It was harsh now that you think about it.
Now Zayne is keeping his distance from you. The owner of the house is sleeping on the couch.
With two pillows and a blanket in hand, you made your way down the flight of mahogany stairs. The living room was in full view, and Zayne was fast asleep on the couch. You nudged the two ottomans to the space between the coffee table and the main sofa. Then you threw the pillows and spread the blanket wide, letting it flutter down while you made yourself fit on the ottoman chairs.
You left a few spaces between you and Zayne, one that was filled by the cold pillow.
2:46 AM. Zayne stirred awake and found a blanket draped over his body. Beside him was his supposedly angry lover, clutching the hem of his shirt. He stared up into the chandelier above and took the pillow that was bordering between them, used it as his own, and pulled you closer, nudging the blanket over both of you even more.
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Rafayel:
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He's standing by the doorway, tapping his foot while a plushie was tucked under his armpit. He was frowning, and you could even see it through the dark.
"What?" you asked, shining the phone his way.
"So you're going to leave me alone tonight? Is that how you're going to play?" He was mad-mad, but that's why you were confused.
"Hey, drama king—you were complaining earlier in the day about my bad sleeping habits—I'm giving you the bed now so you can be at ease, but now you're mad at me again. Do you want me to sleep on the floor of your bedroom or something?"
"Duh? Of course not. I'm just complaining because it's true, but I never said you should sleep in the guest room."
"Then are you going to be alright with my sleeping habits?"
"No."
"Then sleep alone."
An audible gasp could be seen on the expression of the Lemurian. He looked so offended with the end of the conversation, but you weren't having it, so you plopped back onto the bed and hid under the covers, hoping that he'd go away.
The moment you peeked back out, you were rapidly crushed under heavy weight, making you sink to the bottom of the bed. Rafayel lay spread out on top of you, keeping you in your position and crushing you underneath him.
"Get off me! You're heavy!" You struggled underneath the blanket, nudging him and kicking him, but he pretended to be a dead body floating in the water. Rafayel kept still; if verbal convincing won't work, then he'll have to make you change your mind.
"Fine! Fine! I'll sleep with you!" you screamed. He rolled to the side, propped his elbows up, and rested his head on his palm. You just wanted to rub that triumphant grin off his face. He happily scooted underneath the blankets and hogged your side of the bed, wrapping his hand around you and shutting his eyes.
You didn't want to make a big deal of it further and decided to head to bed as well.
You were stirred awake by a strain in your neck. The lids of your eyes lifted at the electrifying pain that traveled to your head. You squinted, barely able to process the faint blue outside the window. Your body was spread out again, and nearby you could see Rafayel making use of the awkward space he was left with.
Guilt washed over your tired body.
Without much thought left, you held onto two pillows and let your body slip down to the carpeted floor. You hugged the pillow and placed another one under your head, liking the furry texture that brushed the side of your bare arms and legs. You closed your eyes again and let the tiredness wash over you.
It was cold for a summer morning. A large yawn escaped your lips and you patiently waited for your eyes to focus, and when they did, your eyes widened immediately at the beautiful sight of a sleeping Lemurian. Rafayel, too, was now on the floor, using his own arm as a pillow.
You tapped on his shoulder, and he just pulled you down back to the floor. "Five more minutes," he groaned, burying his face in your collar. Luckily, it was a Saturday, and you didn't have to go to work. You could indulge him in the meantime.
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Author's footnotes: lol the tiktok was very cute, something that you'd see in a rom-com enemies to lovers sort of romance story. It would be a pretty redundant snippet if every situation is the same for the love interest so I took the liberty of changing things a bit.
Layout by me, using Canva Premium | Do not repost
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hoshifighting ¡ 1 month ago
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Hello ❤️
Can you please write about seventeen when they take care of you after an angry sex❤️❤️❤️
seungcheol’s immediately switching gears. carefully untangling your limbs from his, he’s already reaching for a towel to clean you up. he’s big on reassurance, constantly whispering how good you did, how proud he is of you, as he gets some water for you both. he’s the type to pull you into his arms, making sure you feel safe and protected, holding you tight while you both come down.
jeonghan’s quick to shift from rough/mean to sweet, almost like he’s making up for how intense it was. “you good my baby? hm?” he brushes the hair out of your face, pampering, running a warm bath for you, coaxing you to relax in the water as he sits on the edge of the tub, making sure you’re comfortable. he’s teasing, still, but in that gentle way, like, “can’t have you falling apart on me, huh?” while he massages your shoulders and kisses your forehead.
joshua’s extra soft with you. he’s immediately kissing your forehead, mumbling sweet reassurances as he wraps you in a blanket. he’ll clean you up carefully, then lay with you. he’s the type to check in often, like hour in hour, making sure you’re hydrated.
junhui is already reaching for the wipes to clean you up. he’s super attentive, running his fingers down your back, soothing you with his touch as he checks in, making sure he didn’t go too hard. he’s probably the one to start humming softly, kissing your shoulders and coaxing you to relax as he wraps you up in the softest blanket, staying close by.
hoshi’s super tender with you. he wraps you up in his arms, holding you close. he’s big on physical affection, running his hands up and down your back, making sure you’re warm and comfy. he’ll talk to you softly, checking in constantly, bringing you water and snacks if you need. he’s got this sweet smile as he brushes your hair out of your face, making sure you feel loved.
wonwoo’s super attentive, always making sure you’re okay after something rough. hands gently stroking your sides. he’s quiet, but that doesn’t mean he’s any less caring—he’ll clean you up with gentle hands, if it's hot, he turn the fan on, if its cold, he cover you with a duvet.
woozi might be quiet during sex, but afterward, he’s so attentive. he’s immediately checking in with you, he’ll grab a warm towel, cleaning you up gently before wrapping you in his THICK—(sorry) arms. he’s not the most talkative, but his touch speaks for him—gentle, soothing, his fingers tracing lazy circles on your skin as he watches over you with those soft, concerned eyes.
minghao likes that holistic care, probably running a warm bath with essential oils or something, he’ll wash your hair, massage your shoulders, and when you’re both cleaned up, he’s wrapping you in the softest robe and holding you close, later, he would give you tea AND water, so you don't get dehydrated.
mingyu would pull you into his lap, constantly checking in, asking if you need water, if he should cook something for you, anything, all while showering you with soft kisses. would probably force u eat a fruit, drink a juice before you sleep, to keep ur glucose in check.
seokmin hates cum sticking on his skin, so he is immediately moving to clean you up, because he knows how uncomfortable it can be. he’s super caring, got that bright, reassuring smile as he wraps you in his arms, holding you close. running his fingers through your hair, whispering how much he loves you, how good you did. his affection is endless, making sure you feel loved and cared for.
seungkwan is already checking in the second u orgasm. “are you okay?” he asks, reaching for the wipes to clean you up. he’s super attentive, taking extra care after a session like thsi, he’s constantly talking to you—even too much sometimes, but in a cute way, reassuring you with soft words, his touch gentle as he runs his fingers through your hair. he’s the type to give you sweets so you 'come back to life' again.
vernon’s care is so sincere. he’s not overly fussy, but he’s always making sure you’re comfortable, his big hands warm up your skin, and he’s the type to just hold you in silence, letting his presence speak for itself. he loves you.
chan’s cleans you up carefully to not brush agains ur sensitive clit/nipples. likes cuddling, holding you tight, his hands running up and down your back in a soothing rhythm. would apologize for being too rough, and would choose some movie for you to watch, but he ends up grinning when he sees u sleeping on the very first minutes of the movie.
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an4stitties ¡ 12 days ago
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back to sch00l with an 3d
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below: tips, diet (+ recipes), & workout
❤︎₊ ⊹ studying is soo important and sometimes dis0rdered eating gets in the way, so we have to do everything we can to avoid brain fog while maintaining high grades!
tips:
make sure you’re getting enough electrolytes! you can do that by drinking lots of sparkling water (or if you don't like the taste of sparkling, mix electrolyte packets into water)
eat nutritious foods! some good l0w cāl options are fruits and veggies, eggs, berries, and more
sleep is soo important to keep your brain running!! try to get at least 9 hours or more every night + sleeping helps with avoiding f00d cravings!
even if you don’t eat the rest of the day, you need to have a protein rich breakfast! that way, you’ll have plenty of energy and your blood sugar will remain low, so you’ll feel satisfied for longer
exercise is a must! every time you feel braing f0g coming, go on a walk!! you have to move your body, whether it's for 10 minutes or an hour (more on that below)
caffeine is your best friend! drink your coffee without sugar, but feel free to add a pinch of cinnamon instead!! if you don't like your coffee black, pour in some milk (either almond, coconut, or oat)
dress warm and comfortable!! being sk1nny means being cold all the time and you don't want to get sick!
don't beat yourself up for e4ting. we all make mistakes and sometimes we have to listen to our bodies and prioritise our wellbeing. just do better next time.
— ❤︎₊ ⊹
diet:
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❤︎₊ ⊹ breakfast
coffee with almond milk and a pinch of cinnamon (20c4ls) + two poached/boiled eggs with vegetables (160c4ls) or 250g greek nonfat yogurt with berries (160c4ls)
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❤︎₊ ⊹lunch
have two rice cakes, with a tablespoon of greek yoghurt each and use fruit/vegetables as toppings (100c4ls) + green tea with lemon to help with digestion (0c4ls)
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❤︎₊ ⊹ dinner
100g canned tuna (strained of water), cucumbers, tomatoes and bell peppers (170c4ls) + lemon or cucumber water (0c4ls)
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❤︎₊ ⊹ snacks
choose any three (all are 50c4ls)
40g green olives
thinly sliced cucumber with 25g sour cream
loads of veggies
one sliced apple with cinnamon
rice cake with strawberries/raspberries
cucumber with eggwhites
bunch of berries and a piece of dark chocolate
70g frozen grapes
cucumber with 60g greek yoghurt, season with red pepper flakes
total: 650-700 c4ls
— ❤︎₊ ⊹
workout:
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try to walk at least 5k steps every day, focus on low impact, fat burning workouts like pilates and yoga, and remember to drink plenty of water
my workout routine
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❤︎₊ ⊹ abs — 25 leg lifts — 25 stretch crunches (regular crunch, but arch your back when you lay down) — 30 russian twists — 2 minute plank
❤︎₊ ⊹ legs + butt — 100 side leg lifts (on each leg) — 50 lunges (25 on each leg) — 50 fire hydrants (each side) — 50 butt kicks — 30 squats — 25 hip thrusts
❤︎₊ ⊹ arms — 50 arm circles — 20 arm pushes (forward) — 20 arm pushes (upwards)
fav youtube workout channels
— move with nicole — lilly sabri — madeleine abeid — growwithjo — daisy keech — gloria song
alright, that's it for now. taking requests, so please lmk what you'd like to see next <33 this is like my fourth time reuploading !
(inspired by the lovely @h0neysugarfree)
pics from 📌
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themissinghand ¡ 2 months ago
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Genshin Impact: Beneath His Gaze
Summary: In which you’re Capitano’s executive assistant who’s a little too good at their job (and coincidently, very good-looking too). 
Or, Capitano hates competition, after all, you belong to him. 
Pairing: Jealous! Il Capitano x Strong! Male Reader ft. Pantalone and Dottore 
Note: Yes. Capitano single-handedly took me out of my writer’s block. That 5.0 update was quite something. This became longer than I ever expected. 
Warning: Slight NSFW. Possessive behaviour, flirting, biting and non-consensual touching. Capitano has claws and sharp tongue.
★・・・・・・★
Il Capitano is a fearsome man. 
True to his title, he is powerful but honorable, respected yet feared by all. Perhaps it was his tall statue, the dark mysterious mask he dons, or maybe, it was his silent demeanor. 
Or perhaps his ruthless means and aura that screamed death.  
People do not simply stroll up to Capitano like they would with Tartaglia, but he detests flies regardless.
Then he met you, with almost an impressive statue matching himself, but with a much more…approachable face. Pretty as the Damselette would call you. 
You were competent, strong, and most importantly, adaptable. A face that could be remembered from either side of the light and dark. 
People described you as the face of an angel, but cunning like the devil. Hence, he promoted you to his only assistant (after all, he needs no assistants, much less bodyguards). However, you seemed to do more than what is required for a mere assistant. 
“Master. Please, have some tea.” When you bring him tea and snacks in the middle of work.
“Master, the weather is cold outside, please take this.” When you give him a heat pack, imbued with your pyro powers. 
“Master, please allow me to take care of these vermin for you.” When you reduced his anger with a slight touch on his hand on his sword, which almost would have destroyed a major section of his mansion. 
Capitano will not admit it, however, his life seems to be filled with a lot of noise, albeit it becoming much easier, and warmer.
“Don’t you think Commander (Y/N) would make a good malewife?” 
Capitano freezes in his steps. Honed in battle, naturally his senses are much more sensitive than others. 
“Are you drunk? I know you’re gay, but how could you go after the Commander? Didn’t you remember how terrifying he was when he almost worked us to death in training?”
There was a little infuriating laugh. 
“But, have you seen him smile and compliment us? Can you blame me? Have you seen others ogling at his half naked body after training? Hey, didn’t you have a crush on him?” 
“T-That was before, and quiet down. Someone might hear you.” 
“I wonder how he would taste…” Steps resumed in the halls, this time, they were quick, but silent. 
“You’re crazy. C’mon, let’s go before someone hears-” 
“Think about it, he has a big chest, and his ass-” 
“Shut up-” 
Suddenly, a large shadow casts over them and they slowly turn around, suddenly feeling cold all over. 
“Master-” 
A scream, before silence finally returned to the halls. 
“Master.” Il Capitano hands you his coat as always, often stained with blood. 
But as always, it was never his.
“Master, Allow me to serve you tea. I obtained this from Sumeru, and it has quite the enticing scent…” 
Again, you chatted as you prepared tea for Capitano, starting from small pleasantries, to his schedule and current affairs. You stood beside him as always and even though your Master did not say a single word of response to you, you knew he was listening. 
Everything was a routine and a reward to you, after all, you were very honoured to assist someone as highly regarded as Il Capitano. 
As fearsome as your Master appears, he allows you to speak your mind, and use his authority as necessary. It was difficult to obtain his trust and you were happy with your progress, even if you had to hide your disgusting feelings for him.
Yes, you had a crush on this man who everyone fears. 
After all, who doesn’t like a rich, powerful, and respected man? 
“Sit.” Suddenly, your Master commanded you. You stop in your ramblings at his command, and you obey. Respectfully seating yourself to his right with a look of quiet surprise. 
You were used to following his orders without question, but Capitano rarely asked you to sit with him like this. Normally, you were too busy managing his affairs or reporting on the state of his forces to sit idly.
As well, he did not touch his tea once today. 
Capitano’s mask obscured most of his face, but you could still feel the weight of his gaze on you, heavy and intense. It was as if he was measuring you, trying to read your thoughts, though you kept your face carefully neutral.
Finally, he took a slow sip of the tea, his silence stretching on as he continued to watch you. You shifted slightly in your seat, feeling the intensity of his focus, but you didn’t falter. After all, this was Capitano—your Master. You had served under him for years, and you pride yourself on your ability to remain composed, no matter the situation.
Finally, he spoke, his voice a low rumble. 
“Do you know what they say about you?”
You blink, caught off guard by the sudden question. 
“What do you mean, Master?”
“The Fatui agents. The ones who flirt with you. The ones who look at you as though you are theirs to claim.” Capitano’s words were clipped, and you could hear the irritation lacing his tone. 
“Do you know how they speak about you?”
Your brows furrowed as you recalled those moments. A fleeting regret crossed your mind; you should have dealt with those pests like everyone else.
After all, you’ve maintained your image and physical appearance only for your Master, and no one else. 
“Master, please forgive me, I will ensure this will not happen again. I assure you that their actions do not affect my duties.”
Capitano’s eyes darkened, his claws gripping the arm of his chair with enough force to make the wood creak. 
“That’s not what I asked.”
The tension in the room thickened, and for the first time, you felt a flicker of unease. Capitano rarely raised his voice or showed any outward signs of frustration, but now… there was something different in the air.
“I… don’t concern myself with such things, Master,” you answered carefully. “My focus is on serving you and fulfilling my responsibilities.”
He stood abruptly, his large form towering over you, casting a shadow across the room. His claws reached down, grabbing your wrist with a firm but controlled grip. 
“And yet, they continue. They think they can speak about you as if you’re theirs to take, as if they have any right.”
You looked up at him, the weight of his words sinking in. There was no mistaking the intensity in his voice, the tension that simmered just beneath the surface. It was an emotion you hadn’t expected from him, at least not toward you.
Could it be-
“Master, I—”
Before you could finish, Capitano pulled you up from your seat with one arm, his strength undeniable as he carried you effortlessly. Your breath hitched as you were suddenly pressed against his chest, the cold metal of his armor a stark contrast to the heat radiating from your body.
"You're mine," he growled, gripping your waist. "No one else can touch you."
Your heart raced in your chest as you stared up at him, mind spinning as you adjusted and adapted as you always had. 
This was new, unexpected. 
You had always been his assistant, his soldier, but now… it was clear that Capitano saw you as something more—his. 
A slow, sly smile tugged at your lips. 
“Master, I am loyal to you.”
Capitano’s grip on you tightened, his lips brushing dangerously close to your ear. 
“Then show me. Let them know you’re mine.”
His words sent a tantalizing shiver down your spine, and for the first time, you found yourself questioning whether you were just his assistant… or something far more dangerous.
In the dim light of Capitano’s private quarters, the air was thick with tension—unspoken, yet undeniably present. 
It had become a dangerous game between the two of you.
You stood by his desk, pretending to review the reports you had brought, while Capitano’s presence loomed behind you, closer than necessary. His claws brushed against your lower back, the contact brief but enough to send heat through your body. You didn't flinch; instead, you leaned into his touch ever so slightly, your pulse quickening at the daring proximity.
"You’re late," he muttered slowly, his voice like gravel, yet there was no malice in it—only something darker.
You turned to face him, a smirk dancing on your lips. 
"I had to ensure no one would notice my absence. Wouldn’t want to ruin your reputation, Master."
His eyes, cold to the world, burned with a heat only you had the privilege of seeing. Without a word, he reached for you, pulling you close with a force that left no room for protest. His lips were on yours in an instant, urgent and commanding.
His claws roamed your body, memorizing every line and muscle as if you were the only thing grounding him to this world.
"Careful, Master," you whispered against his lips, your voice teasing. "If we’re caught…"
He silenced you with another kiss, rougher this time, his grip firm as he pressed you against the desk. 
"No one will dare." 
You reveled in it all. 
As his executive assistant, your dedication to work and training had caught the attention of many, including some of the Harbingers.
One evening, after a rigorous training session with Capitano, you quickly changed to a clean appearance and immediately rushed to your Master’s office. However, it seems there were people waiting for you in the halls, which seemed to be a common occurrence recently. 
This time, it wasn’t just Fatui Cicin Mages or Agents though. Much more difficult, but not hard to handle. 
After all, you worked your way up to this position for a reason. 
“Well well well, who do we have here?” 
“Lord Dottore, Lord Pantalone. How can I be of assistance?” Dottore’s eyes gleamed with mischief as he observed you, something you were keen to notice. 
“A fine specimen indeed…” He approached you casually as you stayed still and kept your eyes low. 
Pantalone, ever the opportunist, leaned in with a sly grin. “I must say, you look like someone who could handle more than just being an assistant. I’m sure we could find a place for someone with your… capabilities.”
You pretend not to notice their serpentine eyes, or the sudden arm over your shoulder, or the slow squeeze on your bicep, and you couldn’t help but shiver when an arm grabbed your waist. 
“How about working for me? I’ll be sure to treat you well.” A seductive whisper to your ear. And you feel trapped beside these powerful men. 
Truly evil. 
You returned a little smirk, which somehow seemed to intrigue them even more. 
“I serve and am loyal to my current Master, however, I am honoured to receive your offer.” 
Before they could respond, you felt a familiar but imposing presence approaching you. Heavy steps that suddenly decided to reveal itself.  
(Y/N).” His voice was deep, drawing all eyes to him.
“Master.” You greet him as usual, and you hear a little ‘tch’ from beside you. 
The halls fell silent. Pantalone and Dottore straightened, their casual airs replaced by a more respectful demeanor. Capitano’s gaze was locked onto you, and you shivered in slight excitement knowing that he was angry.
“You’re late.” Capitano states before walking off, as if prompting you to follow him. After you bid farewell to the two other amused harbingers, who seemed quite intent in touching your muscles one last time before letting you go. 
You followed your Master down the hall into his office, the tension between you palpable.
Once the doors shut in his office, Capitano turned around, and you felt like you couldn’t move or breathe. 
“You are quite the vixen.” Sharp claws wrapped around your throat and raised you up to his eye level. 
Before you could respond, his lips crashed onto yours in a fierce, demanding kiss. The sudden intensity took you by surprise, but you quickly found yourself responding with equal fervor.
When he finally pulled away, you felt breathless as you stared back at him.
“You enjoy their attention.” he stated, disappointment evident in his voice.
“You’re mine, and yet, you dare covet something more?”
You met his gaze with a smirk, showing your true colours. 
“And if I enjoy their attention?”
Capitano’s eyes darkened further. He pulled you into another heated kiss, his claws gripping your hips firmly. You were sure that would leave some bruises.
“You must be punished.” 
“Master-urgh!” You resisted the urge to scream as sharp teeth sunk into your collarbone, and an alien tongue swept over your neck. 
It was the right choice as you felt a pair of eyes glaring at you, so you remained silent before he dropped you onto the floor. Instantly, you inhaled sharply and struggled to catch your breath as you quickly kneeled for your life.
“Please, forgive me, Master. My life is yours.”  
For Capitano, he felt a sick satisfaction seeing you beg like a little dog.
Il Capitano believed he had to tighten his leash. 
During the next few days, you did your best to focus on your work, trying to push aside the lingering tension. But you could always feel a pair of cold eyes constantly on you. Especially when you interact with other people. 
“Well, well, how is our little assistant holding up?” Pantalone grinned as he cornered you again in the hall. “How long before Capitano locks you away, hm?”
Dottore chuckled darkly, his fingers lightly trailing down your arm, sending a shiver through you. 
“The offer is still on the table. We’d take good care of you,” he said, his voice dripping with false sweetness. “You’d be in much better hands.”
With the same fake yet alluring smile, you slowly back away from their touch. You didn’t need to say anything after all, you could practically feel him coming.
The familiar sound of heavy footsteps echoed through the corridor.
In an instant, Capitano was beside you, his claws gripping your shoulders firmly. Without a word, he pulled you away from the two Harbingers, his strength overwhelming as he practically dragged you down the hall. Pantalone and Dottore watched with amusement, smirking at the sight of Capitano’s thinly veiled rage.
You didn’t even have a chance to speak as Capitano led you into his private quarters and slammed the door shut behind you. His breathing was heavy, and his eyes—what little you could see through his mask—burned with a mixture of anger and desire.
“You’re mine,” Capitano reminded, his voice low and dangerous. 
Before you could respond, he lifted you with ease, your feet leaving the ground as he pinned you against the wall. His massive claws gripped your waist and ass, claws digging into your flesh as his lips crushed against yours in a kiss.
You gasped into the kiss, and wrapped your legs around him. He clawed at your chest as if he was trying to prove a point—that you belonged to him and no one else, and you whimpered when you felt pain.
And despite everything, you found yourself leaning into him, drawn to the darkness that radiated from him.
"Master, I'm yours."
His touch was intoxicating, and even though you knew how dangerous this was, you couldn’t help but be pulled deeper into the web Capitano had spun around you.
716 notes ¡ View notes
honeydazai ¡ 4 months ago
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୨୧·࣭࣪̇˖ taking care of you when you're sick
feat.: Dazai, ChĹŤya, Ranpo, Fyodor, Nikolai, Sigma
warnings: none!
join my tag list here! 🪻
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The moment you fall sick, DAZAI gets all the more annoying, obnoxious to the core as he whines about how unfair it is that you're sick and he's not — translating to “that you don't have to go to work and he does”. He might just use your sickness as an excuse to stay at home himself; after all, when you're in this critical of a condition, he has to be by your side at all times, right? Just in case of an emergency. Surely Kunikida and the President agree.
Taking care of others or even of himself isn't what he's particularly good at, though he will pretend to be absolutely certain about cuddling being a certain cure for any illness. If you threaten to give him the cold shoulder otherwise, he'll also go to the pharmacy and buy you medication, though he will either complain about it, or he'll play it up to be his God-given mission to save his stunning girlfriend's life.
“Hm? What do you mean, bella? Of course I've got the President's 'okay' for staying at home. Taking care of you is most important, after all, don't you agree? .. Don't be mean, I am taking care of you. I made you tea just now, didn't I?"
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CHŪYA really doesn't like it whenever you're sick. While he's faced a handful of way more threatening situations before, he can't help but worry when you whine about your head hurting and your throat aching, about your stomach acting up or your vision blurring. It's not his fault that you're on his mind all day — he just wants you to be well. Is that too much to ask for?
Naturally, that translates to him being awfully good when it comes to him nursing you back to health. He wouldn't describe himself as a natural caretaker, but he is, in a way; he's protective and caring by nature, and he makes sure you're relatively well before he leaves for work every day. You don't just get the best medication on the market, but also energising meals made by him with the help of authentic recipes from elderly women he found online. To not fully lose his image, he half-heartedly complains occasionally, though his words are immediately redeemed by his beaming smile when he notices you're faring better.
“Jeez, that's one annoying cold you've got. It's been, what, like two weeks now and it's still not gone. Whatever. I've found this new soup recipe, though. It looks promising enough, doesn't it? I'll try to make it for dinner.”
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RANPO admittedly is rather bad at taking care of you. To be blunt, he much prefers it when you coddle and spoil him, not the other way around, though he tries in his own ways — which mostly include sharing his snacks with you and being near you despite the risk of getting infected himself.
Unfortunately, you're not spared from his usual honesty; when you look downright awful, dark circles underneath your eyes, he will tell you just that. If you flake out on any dates the two of you had planned previously, he will whine, but at least he won't hold a grudge. While he's not particularly committed to being a caretaker, he at least stays by your side and brings you medicine and painkillers.
“You should eat more, y'know. Yes, I know you're nauseous. You've said so about twenty times already. You won't feel any better until you eat and drink enough, though. That's common sense.”
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Naturally, FYODOR is more than simply good at taking care of you whenever you fall ill. With his age, it's no wonder that he has quite some experience and knows of many ways to heal you, though some of them might include disgusting homebrewed potions. You're best of just not asking what they're made of if you want to have any chance in downing them.
Unfortunately, his approach to helping you regain your health is more clinical than loving. He takes wonderful care of you, but he's not the type to cuddle with you and whisper sweet nothings in your ear while you're sneezing and coughing. If you ask sweetly enough, however, he might just read you a bedtime story or two.
“What is it, dear? I was just going to get you a new glass of water. .. Ah, I see. Do you really want me to stay that badly? Alright, then. Though me remaining by your side won't give you an excuse to skip taking your medication.”
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It's no surprise whatsoever that NIKOLAI is not the most caring guy, simply put, and he might just tease you about being sick throughout the whole ordeal. He can't help it; you glaring at him, exhausted and sneezing, makes him giggle. Still, he's not all bad — he revels all the more in your surprised expression when he presents you with homemade soup, a family recipe, or so he tells you, and he smiles, content, when you admit that it tastes rather lovely.
With his ability, it's easy for him to get whatever you might need, whether that's food or a cup of tea or a bucket to throw up in, from the kitchen without moving from your bedside, so be prepared to spend quite a lot of time with him in the next few days — or weeks. Though, luckily, he's there to entertain you, not the other way around; when you say you want to curl up and just sleep the sickness off, he'll just keep watch next to you, silent and calm. After all, he does want you to feel better.
“Hmm, what did you say? You like my cooking? I'm honoured, doll! You're too kind! How about a quiz about what I put in there — poison, carrots, red beet, or all three? Ah, not feeling up for it, are you? What a shame. It's all three, if you're curious. I'm just kidding, of course. Don't you worry your pretty little head.”
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SIGMA is the best choice for who to go to when ill. Not only is he kind and caring, he's also responsible and organised and, if you follow every step he tells you — eat his home-cooked soup, drink this medicine, sleep for as much as possible, take hot or cold compresses, inhale water with herbal essences —, you'll be at full health again in no time.
Even though he unfortunately can't stay at home all day to be by your side — duties at the casino call, even though he'd much rather not go —, he tries to spend as much time as possible with you, telling you about what has happened that day and how much he looked forward to being home with you again while your eyes flutter closed. When you've almost fallen asleep, his lips gently press against your forehead, even if that means he risks getting sick himself.
“Are you feeling better yet? No? Well, that's to be expected. It's only been a day, after all. I've brought you some more medicine, as well as some soup. Here, give it a taste, will you?”
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684 notes ¡ View notes
deepdisireslonging ¡ 6 months ago
Text
Cake or Cookies
A good round of sexy texting during girls’ night leads to sexy personal time when Bucky gets home.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x curvy!Reader
Warnings/Promises: food mention, descriptions of injuries (canon-level), dirty talk, sexting, SMUT, oral (both receiving), implied further smut
Word Count: 3080
Note: They can pry the Avenger Apartment/Tower from my cold dead hands. Everything’s fine, everyone is fine; what trauma? Why can’t we have nice things? I went hunting through some of my lost prompts and found a couple to squeeze together. Happy reading!
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Girls’ night in the Tower was bound to be dangerous. It was usually when Natasha came up with the next round of pranks to play on the boys. And when Wanda took it upon herself to create the best pillow fort to watch movies in. Her magic made it easy to pile the couch pillows and blankets into what looked more like a cozy cave than a fort. And Maria kept track of where to find any films not already stored in Stark’s library.
You were in charge of snacks. Drinks were cozy only: tea, hot chocolate, and coffee. Alcohol parties were for other nights. Snacks ranged anywhere from home-made chips to hors d'oeuvres (fancy and simply indulgent), to the smorgasbord of mass produced favorite snacks you raided from the corner bodega. But you were stumped when it came to tonight’s desserts. The bodega’s sweet treats were present, cheap candy and the like, but you were stuck between the roll of cookie dough and a box mix for cupcakes.
Stumped, you didn’t acknowledge the warm body that ghosted up behind you until a hand slid across your waist. “It’s girls’ night. What are you still doing here?” Sitting down the treats, you turned in Bucky’s arms and scratched your fingers into the hair at the nape of his neck.
He lightly kissed your forehead. “Needed a break from Tony. Can you blame me?”
“Not at all.”
You both inhaled deeply, cheek to cheek. The last mission had been a rough one. Most of the team had come back banged up. And you still had a nasty scrape of road burn up one leg. Which is why you were wearing the equivalent of biker shorts. Pepper had gotten them for you sometime after the social media trend of those leggings ladies liked to tease their S.O’s with. They were surprisingly supportive of your form. You usually wore them underneath your gear because they were borderline indecent. But, with one of Bucky’s oversized shirts covering your figure, nobody had commented.
Except for Bucky as he slid his hands down your body to rest over the curve of your ass.
“I thought these stayed out of sight?”
You teased a glance up at him. “Usually, yes. But It’s girls’ night. We all wear the equivalent of our pajamas since you boys will be out. You are all going out, right?”
He nodded. “Yes. Eventually.” But he didn’t move. He hugged you closer, brazenly tilting your head to one side with his nose so he could kiss the underside of your jaw.
“Y/L/N!” Natasha waved from the living room. “Are we ready to go, or what?”
A smile spread across your face. You lightly pushed Bucky away, making him whine. Natasha was already starting the voting poll for the evening’s movies when you turned back to the counter. “I’ve got to bake before the party starts. Do you have a preference for what sweets you’d like to be left over? Cookies or cupcakes?”
Bucky pressed up behind you, resting his large hands on the counter on either side of you, and griding his front into your ass. “Cookies. There’s enough cake in this kitchen already.” He slapped your ass, following with both his hands taking tight squeezes of your flesh.
As you gasped, he rushed out. The wink he shot you from the door warned you that the tease would not be the evening’s last.
Fifteen minutes later, the cookies were out, the movie was in, and everyone was settled into their favorite pile of pillows.
Five minutes into the movie, the texting started.
Lover Boy <3: “How’s the movie?”
You rolled your eyes as you turned your phone on silent. If Okoye heard your phone again, you’d never get it back. “We’re watching Magic Mike. So… It’s going well.” You added a smiley face with its tongue sticking out for good measure.
Bucky’s messages popped up every few minutes. You kept your phone screen towards you to see the notification light up your screen without bothering the other women.
Lover Boy <3: “Should I be jealous?”
You: “Nah. Their gyrating doesn’t do it for me.”
Lover Boy <3: “Good to know.”
Lover Boy <3: “Is there anything in the movie that does ‘do’ it for you?”
You smothered a chuckle into your blanket. Each passing second that you took to come up with a teasing reply was surly wreaking havoc on your man.
You: “Maybe. Who wants to know?”
His reply was slow in coming. When it did, you almost fumbled your phone into the floor.
Lover Boy <3: *image incoming*
The picture you received was of Bucky’s hand resting on the top of his thigh. They were out to dinner somewhere, the edge of the table blocking your photo view from the rest of the guys. In the curve between his forefinger and thumb, his bulge was the center of attention. You stuck a sucker in your mouth to cover up your gasp. But the other ladies were too busy hooting for the first dance scene to notice.
You: “Just him? I must be slipping. Especially since I thought you really liked my shorts earlier.”
Lover Boy <3: “I like those shorts because I like taking them off. Girls night got in the way.”
You: “You’ve got to come home sometime.”
Lover Boy <3: “Then what do you have in mind?”
You turned off the flash for your camera and waited for the TV screen to illuminate your face. Sucker holding down your tongue, you sneaked the pic. Before any of the girls could see and tease you. While it sent, you sucked on the round sugar treat. You imagined Bucky’s cockhead on your tongue, as you knew he would too. His reply came in seconds.
Lover Boy <3: “Minx”
You: “And?”
Lover Boy <3: “When I do get home, I’m going to taste something sweeter. All night long.”
Lover Boy <3: “If you can handle it.”
Biting your lip, you smiled into your blanket.
You: “We both know what I can handle. But can you handle what I want to do to you?”
You: “Bet I can blow you so good you forget how to speak Russian before morning.”
You: “Actually, bet I can make you forget all your languages.”
Lover Boy <3: “An official bet?”
Now it was dangerous territory. Neither of you would wager anything that would show in public. Or bring attention from the team inside the tower. But Bucky’s winnings had a steep cost on your ability to walk the next day. Yours usually meant him taking a few days off to spend time together in some distant cabin.
You: “Do we have time to disappear to the Rockies when I win?”
Lover Boy <3: “We just finished a mission. I’m sure I can convince Steve to leave us alone… at least for several nights in a row when I win.”
It was on.
He played dirty by escaping to the bathroom to shoot you a picture of his cock. It was already thick for you, proud and flushed in his palm.
You also escaped. But the picture you sent didn’t require you to take your clothes off. All you did was tug down the front of his borrowed shirt, and splay your fingers wide between your breasts.
You: “Can’t wait to squeeze you between these.”
Lover Boy <3: “9hey now…”
Good. His texting was already stumbling.
You: *picture incoming*
All you did was rest your hand over your throat. But Bucky’s reply of a bunch of scrambled letters made you laugh. You returned to the movie.
You: “Can’t wait for you to get home. But we’ve got about 3 more hours of movies to watch. Think you can last that long?”
Lover Boy <3: “If I have to. Might have to take care of myself before then.”
Wanda looked over as you squirmed in your seat.
You: “You can’t wait for me? I’ll wait for you.”
When the movie lit up enough, you took a picture of the pillow between your thighs.
Lover Boy <3: “Promise?”
You: “Say please.”
His reply, despite the distance between text and actually hearing his voice, dripped with promise. You bit your lip, hearing his growl in your head.
Lover Boy <3: “Since when do get to make the demands around here?”
Lover Boy <3: “Please.”
You: “Since I’m home. Away from the consequences of mouthing off at you till later.”
Lover Boy <3: “You’re not sharing this conversation with the ladies are you? You’re not usually this… sassy.”
You: “This sass is rated E for everyone. But, no. This conversation is just between us.”
You: “I have to stop texting. Natasha is beginning to notice.”
Lover Boy <3: “Until I get my hands on you:”
It was several minutes until you checked your phone, waiting for the others to drop their questioning looks. When you did, you had to smother your moan. He sent one last picture of his tongue out between his fingers. A promise of delectable problems to come.
***
Somebody texted the guys when the movies were almost over. They arrived halfway through you girls cleaning up.
“How was the double feature?” Tony asked. He snagged a remaining hors d'oeuvres off the tray before Maria could stick it in the fridge.
You didn’t hear the reply. All you could focus on was how lust-blown Bucky’s eyes were as he stared you down from the other side of the room. You pressed your thighs together. If the way your chest heaved was any indication, you were in for a long night. Steve barely gave you a glance when you walked past him. Bucky gliding past made him give your departure a second look.
The hallway to your room was dark. The lights that illuminated the floor wouldn’t engage fully unless there was an emergency. Which meant that your shadow was faded against the wall. And it was fractured into several clusters of shadows at reach installation. You didn’t look back. It was part of the game. You couldn’t hear him, but sometimes you could have sworn your shadows had an extra layer.
When you reached for your door handle, another hand beat you to it. Bucky pressed up behind you, pushing you into the room and pinning you to the inside of the door as he locked it. He slid his knee between your legs. Fascinated, he enjoyed the show as you slid the apex of your thighs across the muscle he gave you. He stopped your movements with a hand on your hip, while the other lifted your wrists above your head.
“Did you actually wait, or was that a tease?” He reached into your shorts, groaning to find your slick there. While you trembled, he loudly sucked his middle finger into his mouth. “Oh, ангел, I am going to ruin you. For teasing me like you did.”
“You – you started it. Technically.”
He brought one of your hands down to rest over the front of his pants. “Maybe. But you laid down the gauntlet. How do you want to do this?”
With a grin, you wriggled out of his grasp. You walked backwards towards your bed. Bucky stalked slowly after you. Turning, you ran your hands down your sides, to your hips. And back to the curve of your ass. “Cake?” You smoothed your hands up from your rear to your breasts. “Or cookies?”
Bucky groaned. “The whole damn bakery if I can get my hands on it.” He guided you onto the bed, crawling over you in a way that stole your breath. When you tried to roll him onto his back to begin the challenge, he chuckled. “Nuh-uh. Challenger goes second.”
“But-“
He silenced you with a kiss. As he deepened it, hands kneading into your flesh and removing your clothes, your rebuttal died on your tongue. He barely pulled back enough to remove his own clothes. It wasn’t long before he was working his mouth down your body, kissing and sucking and nipping at your skin until he made it to your sex. 
Sometimes part of the challenge included a timer. Like that one gala when he dared you steal away with him during Tony’s speech, and cum before the ending round of applause. With his head buried under your dress, he won with enough time to participate in the applause for a speech you didn’t give a damn about. You didn’t find out till later that Steve had kept track of when you two disappeared and reappeared. Bucky wrote the time on your bathroom mirror as the time to beat. It had yet to be broken.
Tonight wasn’t one of those times. There was all the time in the world. All night to edge or overstimulate each other to your hearts’ content.
Breathing warm air over your sex, his grin between your thighs sent a ripple of goosebumps over your skin. You weren’t sure which was more disarming: his knowledge of your body and its sweet spots that he could make you cum in minutes, or that same knowledge used to bliss you out over hours till you couldn’t remember more than screaming his name. With his tongue, he began the challenge. As if you weren’t soaked already, he made a mess of you. Curling his fingers through your folds. Delving his tongue deep in search of the ability to taste you for days. When he scraped his teeth across your clit, the electricity tightened your fingers in his hair.
He wasn’t drawing this out. A man on a mission, Bucky was doing everything he could to bring you to the brink as fast as he could. The speed that you hurtled toward release stole your breath. That was his plan. Shock you while trying to beat his time so that you wouldn’t be able to speak. And then he’d win double the bragging rights.
And, damn him, it might just work.
Hungrily, he slurped up your pleasure. Adding a third finger to his onslaught, he curled them all to make you see stars. His metal arm flashed out to pin down your hips before you could arch away from him. The metal was cold, frigid, against your flushed skin. The difference in temperature was enough of an overload to your sparkling nerves that your eyes screwed shut. You babbled a series of sounds, making Bucky hum in delight.
But when he came up for air, gently stroking your folds to ease you down, you surprised him.
“Is that all you got, Barnes?”
“Fuck. Seriously?” He rested his cheek against the inside of your thigh.
You did your best to steady your breath. No point in revealing those six words were all you could manage. After another moment, you curled your own finger. You summoned him to hover over you, dangling his dog-tags in your face. Catching one between your teeth, you gripped and pushed his shoulders until he was on his back.
It was your turn to kiss down his body. Across his collar bone and pecs. Down that center chasm between his abs. From one hip bone, down his V, and up to the other side. As you took his length in hand, you had to smile. The poor man should have let you pleasure him first, instead of torturing himself and his cock with waiting. Gently, you circled your thumb around his tip. It dragged a groan out between his teeth. Good. The more vocal he was, the better you could track his ability to speak. Or lack thereof.
You set the challenge into the back of your mind and got to work in pleasing your man.
The first movements were gentle. And careful around how sensitive he was. Still, each touch and twist kept his voice active. He tried to watch you, but kept dropping his head back in pleasure as you quickened your movements. While he was laid back, you shifted your position.
His head snapped up, and he cursed loudly in Russian as his cock was enveloped between your breasts.
Darting out your tongue, you kitten licked the tip of his cock when it came into range. It gave you no small pleasure to watch your man, the Winter Soldier and former Commando, fall to pieces because of you. He cursed louder in English, Russian, and… was that German? But the more you jerked him between your breasts, the more his vocabulary scrambled together. You waited patiently. His metal hand twitched towards to before fisting the sheet. His flesh hand reached back for the pillows, sheets, headboard. Anything to ground himself. Then you struck. You let go of your breasts and dipped low enough to swallow him down. He roared as he bumped the back of your throat. Planting his feet on the bed, his thighs trembled with keeping himself from thrusting into your mouth.
That was fine. You moved enough for the both of you. And, just as his Russian was little more than the most strained of curses, you settled his balls into one hand, and slid the other up his torso. Your nails lightly caught his skin over his heaving breaths.
The high-pitched hiss from the depths of his lungs was your only warning before he filled your mouth.
Your ministrations slowed. You took every ounce of his pleasure, and smiled around his cock as you sucked your way off his length.
He dragged you up to bury his face in the crook of your neck. His lips trembled while trying to say something. Anything. But all he could do was pant into your skin.
You smiled. And kissed the underside of his jaw. While you both recovered, you murmured gentle reassurances between breaths.
“You cheated,” he finally managed.
“Oh? When did I manage that?”
Running his fingers through his hair, he stared you down. “Those damn shorts.”
With a laugh, you nipped at his chest. “What? You did get to take them off, like you wanted. And I can’t help it if you decided to run your hands all over me and get yourself hard. It jazzed me up too. So, in my mind, we’re even.”
“Fine.” He tilted up your face to kiss you. Mumbling against your lips, he complained, “you’re using alotta words there, ангел.”
“And you’re still capable of Russian.”
Bucky grinned. “Then I guess this challenge isn’t done.”
And it wasn’t until long into the night.
***
АнгоН: angel
***
Masterlist
Marvel Masterlist 
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urhoneycombwitch ¡ 2 months ago
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hold me like water
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foreword: followup to my unofficial eddie x shy!reader series. not necessary to read in order but here’s one and two if u want. this takes place after the events of s4 but everyone (including the trailer sorry i’m too attached) is mostly fine and so is the town. except for all that pesky PTSD… lol. written epilogue-style but I just wanted to give them something soft… not done w them yet!!
cw: PTSD, nightmares, trauma bonding, medical stuff, scarring/wounds, light smut post-traumatic event, R has breasts+a vagina, R wears a bikini
wc: 3k
___
For the first month, you don’t leave the trailer.
More specifically, you don’t leave Eddie. 
While he’s recovering from the attacks, you confine yourself to his room; Wayne had pulled in a comfy armchair for you when he realized you’d been sleeping on Eddie’s floor for three nights in a row, just to be closer to him than the guest bed down the hall. 
Now, with the chair, you’re actually getting some sleep at night- enough to tend to Eddie’s wounds every morning and evening without yawning comically loud. 
After the first few weeks of healing, while Eddie is still tender but learning to walk shakily with the use of a cane, you still stick to the boundaries of the trailer. Neither of you really want to go anywhere, anyways: Hop’s instructions to keep a low profile while the dust settles on the murder investigation have to be taken seriously. 
Plus, Eddie and you are very well taken care of by your friends-turned-family. Anything you could ever want for shows up on your doorstep and kitchen counters by a rotating crew of familiar faces; Mrs. Byers brings groceries and finds excuses to stay longer, busying herself by making tea, doing the dishes; Mrs. Wheeler brings casseroles and her son, who steals Eddie away for intense D&D discussions (Eddie made Mike interim DM, and the power’s really gone to his head). 
The trailer is almost always filled during the day, bikes in a heap on the front strip of grass, Beemer parked at an angle to avoid a popped tire. Steve picks up Eddie’s medication every Friday, brings it over along with a bunch of VHS’s and Robin. Sometimes Jonathan and Argyle join in on movie nights, too, and Nancy when she’s not busy with work.
It’s easy and peaceful, spending time with people who understand and share the same traumas. People who don’t stare at the bandages or Eddie’s cane or ask why you won’t leave the trailer any more. 
The government officials from the now-defunct Hawkin’s lab call every few days, wall-mounted landline ringing like a toll bell at 3pm sharp. You tell them the same thing, every time, curt and firm- if they want to interrogate you and Eddie, they’ll damn well have to come here. Or drag you, kicking and screaming.
Steve asks about it one afternoon, naive and confused with the force of your phone slamming- “Y’know, they probably just want you to sign one of those Don’t-Talk-About-This papers and give you a bunch of money. I heard they’re setting up college funds for all the kids-”
“Good for them.” Your dry remark cuts in smoothly from the couch, hand on Eddie’s knee as a lifeline. In a voice wobbly with anger, eyes glittering with unshed tears, your chin tilts up, defiant- “It’s the least they can do. I want them to look me in the eyes when they try to grovel for my silence. For Eddie’s. After all they fucking did to us, to the town-”
Eddie’s hand slips over yours, squeezes. Steve raises his hands in a placating gesture, surrendering with haste, then retreats to the kitchen for movie night snacks. 
“Never heard you so bossy before,” Eddie murmurs, at the shell of your ear. Goosebumps cascade across your neck when he rests his heavy palm there, cold rings warming to the temperature of your skin. “Goin’ to bat for me. It’s hot.”
You’re a couple of steps removed from the quiet, shy thing Eddie’s known for years. Seeing the love of your life almost bleed out in an alternate dimension will do that to a person.
Owens shows up at the trailer one morning, at the end of summer after all the phone calls provide no results. Him and two of his muscliest-looking lab guys are met by you in the threshold of the door, arms crossed and somehow looking fierce despite the fuzzy blue bathrobe you’re swathed in.
“The goons stay outside.” Your word is final. Even the doctor knows it.
The two men in coats settle on either side of the porch, while Owens is allowed to sit at the kitchen table indoors, accepting a mug of coffee Eddie generously supplies (you certainly aren’t in a hospitable mood, glaring daggers at him from the opposing chair).
Predictably, the doctor explains he’s here with some NDA’s for both you and Eddie to sign, the shiny promise of a government-allotted chunk of change waiting on the other side.
Hidden from view under the table, your fingertips skate over Eddie’s palm, lying open and pliant for you. Calmly, like you’re stating the weather, you tell Owens to double his offer.
By the time he’s done using your phone, Owens is wiping sweat from his forehead with a kerchief. Once the papers are signed, him and the lab goons load back into the shiny black car like silent sentries. 
They leave, and Eddie laughs, a full, rich noise that makes your heart ache. His fist slams the table in excess of humor, mugs jumping with a clink. “Goddamn. You just made the richest guy in Hawkins run off with his tail between his legs.” 
“Pretty sure Harrington Senior has him beat,” you mutter around the rim of your coffee, unable to repress the satisfied smirk that tugs at your lips. 
The payoff is a sickening amount, more money than you or Eddie have ever seen- enough to send you both to college, twice, with a hefty nest egg for the future leftover. You put the bulk of yours in a savings account, just so you don’t get dizzy looking at the numbers. 
Eddie does the same, with the exception of a down payment on the vacant trailer at the end of the park. Along with the new place, Wayne gets a fresh mattress, a couch that doesn’t have holes, and a proper, working stereo to play all his “old man country” tapes (in Eddie’s words). The quiet and deep thankfulness Wayne gives you both makes you feel like you’d do it all over again, like the fight was all worth it for the Laz-E-Boy in the corner and the new mug collection shelf. 
Eddie floats the idea of college again, now that you’ve got the funds to make it possible. You’ve certainly got the time, too- neither of you have any need to work long shifts at the diner or garage anymore. 
Unfortunately, this makes it all the more easy to form reclusive habits. By autumn, the solidness of your refusal to leave the trailer has less to do with helping Eddie than it does with your own fear of what lies beyond the comfort of your home. 
Most days, you work on healing. Eddie’s still your lifeline, gentle encouragement turning stern when you need it the most- he talks you into visiting Max by yourself, a veritable feat; the short walk between the two trailers feels like death, your knock shaky with nerves. It feels horrifying, to walk the thin line of being both braver and more scared than you’ve ever been.
You stay for an hour. The next day, for two- Max has a new kitten that passes the time easily, the girl giggling behind her new thick-rimmed glasses while pulling string across the floor for the tiny thing to pounce on. One night, you bring dinner for both the Mayfields and stay well past supper; it’s nearly 11 by the time you return to Eddie’s open arms, triumphant in your success with a tupperware of Mrs. Mayfield’s cookies to boot.
Your bravery builds in increments. Eddie cleans the rust from his van that’s been sitting untouched since spring, and takes you on drives that go a bit farther each time. The Byers’ place for lunch, Dustin’s to pick up an extra radio, then all the way to north Hawkins for more of Mrs. Wheeler’s plastic-wrapped dishes she asks you to relieve her of. 
When winter rolls around, Steve takes advantage of his now-permanently empty home to throw a holiday party. It’s loud with chatter and overwhelming with noise but it feels so good to be surrounded by it, by everyone, Eddie’s hand a steady comfort on your waist or lower back as you eat and drink and make merry with your friends. 
Hop pulls it off, a Christmas miracle- all the murders get pinned on Jason, buried six feet under with parents who skipped town ages ago. You’re out for groceries one cold morning and realize that not a single shopper has even given Eddie a second glance, conspicuous as he is in black leather and flashy silver jewelry. 
The strings loosen with a sigh, fluttering in release, allowing some space for you both to breathe.
Sex has been… different, lately. There’s been lots of readjusting, both physically and mentally- accounting for unforeseen muscle spasms, bone-deep bruises hidden beneath rippled skin, tissue and scarring pulled taut, testing the limits of new pains.    
The first time, just a few weeks after the attacks, Eddie had begged to go down on you. He wanted the comfort of your thighs, your taste and scent, all-consuming, to think about anything else other than his wounds. 
You’d been more than hesitant, terrified of hurting him, of letting your focus shift inwards. More in your head than ever, it took Eddie over an hour to coax an orgasm from the walls that’d been built back up around your pleasure; even with his lithe tongue and long, seeking fingers, it took forever and an age to get you anywhere close to the edge.
Eddie didn’t complain once- in fact, he kind of got off on the amount of time you let him spend between your legs. The muscles in his right arm were trembling by the time you clamped down on his fingers, jaw burning but keeping the suction at your clit even while your hips rolled strong as a tidal wave against his face.
And before you could open your mouth to apologize, or say something equally silly, panting and wrung-out and heartbreakingly beautiful against the pillows, Eddie’s teeth flashed at the inside of your thigh. 
You’d jolted, breathless and giggly, endorphins soaring as he’d tenderly crawled up the length of your body to slip his tongue between your lips, sharing the earthy tang of your release. 
“One more,” he’d said, uninjured arm taking the bulk of his weight while he dipped down to mouth at your breast. “And this time, put your hands in my hair. I’m getting jealous of the sheets.”
As Eddie’s physical limitations lessen with time, your mental barriers ease, as well. There’s still some stilted moments of relearning, of working together in bodies that don’t always respond the way you want them to. 
There are raw, stripped-open emotions that have you clawing at Eddie’s back, his nails leaving indents on the flesh of your hips. To keep pressure off the worst of his side wounds, you find new positions, usually some form of your thighs draped over his or the welcome weight of you in his lap. 
He’s endlessly patient. The kind of patient that makes you want to run, far and fast, and he knows it; when your pleasure recedes, frustration in the form of tears and hands pressed to your face, Eddie’s there to soothe. To try a new angle, to slow down or speed up, offering a break or an extra pillow to keep you comfortable and feeling good. 
If you were comforted by each other’s presence during the night before the Spring Break from hell, it’s tenfold now. Neither of you will sleep a wink if Eddie’s not wrapped around you like a koala, snoring gently, overheated and tacky with sweat by morning but neither willing to compromise the closeness. 
Nightmares are easier to handle, too- you’re there to soothe the sweat-coated bangs from Eddie’s forehead when he wakes up whimpering in fear, coaxing his panic and adrenaline back down. He’s so fine-tuned to the rhythms of your body that even though your own nightmares rarely end in noise, Eddie often wakes anyways from the disturbance in your breaths. 
Just as you do for him, sometimes all it takes to get you back to sleep is a tender voice, a stroke of the arm, a reassurance in the dark that he’s with you. 
A year after it all happened, Eddie hears you singing in the shower.
If he wasn’t craning to hear the gentle splashing noises as confirmation of your presence, he would’ve missed it. Eddie leans with his good shoulder on the wood frame, door partially cracked to let the melody of your voice float through.
Stevie Nicks is crooning sweetly from the handheld radio on the bathroom counter, and you, just as sweet and twice as pretty singing along. 
Eddie closes his eyes, puts a hand to his chest; through the fabric of his shirt he feels the raised, bumpy edges of scar tissue, but there’s something beyond it. Curling around his heart, making it ache- it feels like healing. Like getting better, at least well enough to sing.
He’s dumbstruck with it. 
That summer, he takes you to Lover’s Lake.
It’s just the two of you, which makes it easy for Eddie to go shirtless; currently, he’s enjoying the way you’re watching him from the back of the van, bare feet swinging and paired with a killer black bikini that he begged you into.
He’s not so sure the scars that criss cross his front and sides are as “metal” as you claim they are, but he’s trying. He’d drag himself over hot coals just to get half a smile; going shirtless is nothing. 
You reach for him, and he walks into the V of your legs willingly, your arms wrapping around his torso, head pressed to the middle of his sternum. Eddie plants his hands on either side of your hips, drops his chin to fit you under it.
“Come swim with me.”
In response, you sigh- a longsuffering, worried sort of noise that leaves your lungs and enters his. He’s been trying to talk you into it for weeks- it’s a miracle he’s gotten you both this far, dressed and ready to take the plunge. 
Eddie’s not really sure why this swim is so important to him. It might have something to do with the fissure at the bottom of the lake, all scabbed over and sewn back together; or maybe it’s the surface, skimmed by a light breeze  and rippling gently, nothing of monsters or alternate dimensions leftover to disturb the placidity. 
Eddie wants to prove that it’s safe, for you and for himself. That the nightmares and the sticky feelings and the tears, they all mean something, of course they do- but the only way to is through. 
So he takes you by both hands and you only drag your feet a little until he’s walking backwards on the shore, water lapping up to his ankles, and you freeze. Heels digging into the wet earth, tense under Eddie’s grasp, eyes wide and darting around like something might come crashing through the treeline.
“Hey. Look at me.” In a voice that’s reserved for you and you alone, Eddie speaks softly, calmly, letting out all the tension of his pull to just hold, instead. “You’re safe. There’s nothing out here that’s gonna hurt us, okay? Steve went all the way back down to the bottom to make sure. No more gate. No nothin’. It’s just a lake.”
“Just a lake,” you repeat, like a mantra as you take another step. The water rolls over your feet; Eddie murmurs his encouragement while leading.
“That’s right, sweetheart. It’s just a lake. Our lake.”
The water rises, up the back of Eddie’s calves, swishing around your shins; the pebble-rock floor shifts with each step. You and Eddie used to spend long summer days here, swimming and picnicking and fucking in the back of the van, syrupy-slow and stretched with time. 
“Our lake.” You’re shivering, teeth chattering, even though the air is hot and the water is just-cool.
Eddie rubs at your upper arms, allaying the goosebumps; waterline up to your waists, now. The rock you’re balanced on beneath the surface jolts, and you stumble forward into Eddie’s arms; in a smooth maneuver, he catches you while sinking into a crouch, pulling you both from the safety of the shallows.
Then, your kicking feet meet nothing but the vastness of the lake, nails biting into Eddie’s arms, fear rattling through your spine until Eddie- treading water while valiantly supporting you, too- tosses his black hair back and whoops. 
The sound is loud, joyful, ricochets across the lake and bounces back from the other shore. He crows at the sun, startles a laugh out of you as he clings harder, kicking to keep you both afloat- “Holy SHIT! We’re swimming in Lover’s Lake!”
“Holy shit,” you agree, giddy and breathless, nerves turning over into disbelief, excitement. “We’re swimming in our lake.”
Eddie kisses you. It’s sloppy and he misses the middle of your mouth as you both try to keep the other from slipping under, teeth clashing, giggles escaping around the sides. He puts a hand dripping with lake water to your cheek, holding you in place, thumb pressing gentle just under your eye. 
“I love you.”
“Love you.” Your reply is swift and just as eager, hand coming to rest at the puckered line of scarring at Eddie’s chest. 
Somewhere at the bottom of Lover’s Lake, a twin crack, a Something that was never supposed to be but now just Is. 
You feel extraordinarily grateful, awash with we made it, as you and Eddie swim out further, shores in the shape of a heart holding you both from all sides.
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hollyhomburg ¡ 4 months ago
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Before I Leave You (Pt.73)
(Omegaverse au, Mafia au, Bts x Reader)
Summary: You are everything to Yoongi, the yoke in his egg, the daffodils on the sidewalk, the sunshine in the morning. Everything. He just had to remember it. 
Tags: Nightmares, angst, hurt/comfort, mention of food issues but they're only talked about in terms of the m/c getting better.
W/c: 10.0k
A/n: the irony of this chapter is that it's going to come out during the wedding of the two people who live in the house that inspired bily, the last time i was there there where sprouts growing in every windowsill and a fluffy throw on every couch so <3 everything will be alright wont it? the house is filled with love in this universe as well as the bily one <3
Previous part- Masterlist - First part
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Downstairs, you and Hobi are shrouded in a particular kind of fuzzy warmth. The kind that only comes from knowing you do not have to be in control anymore. That there is no hidden consequence waiting for you. no shoe to drop. no monster under your bed.
The downstairs is shrouded in that kind of quiet and comfort that comes with warm evenings and supple hands that have nothing to do but loving and set about diligently at that task. Like cold breezes in summer, icing and chocolate, and sunshine on raspberries warming their sugar.
But the upstairs nest room is not so peaceful.
Tae’s post-coitus talks are legendary at this point, as Yoongi sits on the edge of the nest, not looking at her because to look at Tae is to encourage more truth to fall from her lips. He busies himself with tucking jungkook in. Sprawled asleep. And tries not to listen to the truth that Yoongi neither wants nor believes he needs.
Right now his brain is fuzzy and prone to believing her.
There are small things all around the nest, pieces of the pack and remnants and evidence of the time the three of them spent here hours ago taking Jungkook apart and putting him back together again. Fucking then sleeping then waking up to fuck again. The arousal burns low at present, sated for now.
A discarded shirt of Jungkook’s sits tangled in a pair of handcuffs because he’d gotten too squirmy for Tae's liking, a silk scarf of Tae’s because he’d gotten mouthy too. A notepad and a bit of paper. Lines scrawled out because Tae’s post-knot clarity always gives her a few good poems, a few good lines.
Yoongi doesn't have to read them to know they're about you. Almost everything Tae writes has You and Jimin in it. The others are there too every now and then- but if Tae had to say it Yoongi knows you and Jimin are her muses.
It takes Tae a few months to digest her feelings into something palatable. Yoongi didn’t need to ask what time period it was written about as he read over her shoulder, pressing kisses to her lips between the lines. Trying not to be a distraction but wanting to be a distraction worthy of Tae’s attention.
This poem that he'd watched her scrawl out, pen to her lips between stanzas. It has the first few months of your relationship all over it.
I know I over-feed the cat, but I can’t help it. If you could eat the love I have for you what would it taste like? Would it be mangoes- Sticky, yellow, sweet. Eat Till the threads of it get stuck Between your teeth. Would it leave you full and sleepy- like bread and pasta? Rigatoni, Penne, pastina stars The candy toothache of my heart Swells thick and gummy. Eat up. I must admit I grow addicted to the brown sugar of your being. Would my love stain the edge of your smile? Like strawberries? Blueberries? Black? I must admit I am afraid of food metaphors When it comes to you. Because just like with food, I fear if I don’t give you enough You’ll go starving, Out of some sense Of beauty and responsibility. Could you love me enough, Would you love me enough if I’m good? Salt, fat, acid, heat. What is owed at our table- A full meal or half? Desert or just a snack? Just tea please, I’m not hungry. I already ate. I know I overfeed the cat, but I can’t help it- I can’t help it at all. If you would eat the love I have for you, Would you still want to be so skinny? Love is warm bellies and not hollow throats. Love cares not for second portions, Only 8 courses Love is a bowl of soup It warms from the inside out. I know I overfeed the cat.
Noodle purrs nearby, the subject of the conversation earlier today that no doubt inspired Tae. Heaped between a pillow and a rolled-up blanket looking overstuffed- like one of your stuffed animals that litter the nest up here and the one downstairs. Jin had gotten a little overzealous on the jellycat website during christmas time.
He's gotten rather chubby, his middle more round than just fluffy. His pudgy tomcat face is charming, eyes blinking slowly as he watches Yoongi toil with his emotions.
"We should put him on a diet" You'd lamented, still feeding him treats, in the kitchen this afternoon. Yellow light slipped through the windows and lunch plates piled high in the sink. A carton of coffee-caramel ice cream and mango sorbet gathering condensation nearby. On your knees before his bowl. Because if you all got after-lunch ice cream treats then he should get some too.
"Don't you dare, he's perfect this way." Tae had replied, scandalized, and made the point of giving Noodle an extra scoop of food and you an extra spoonful of sweet frozen milk.
Yoongi knows that your comment had stayed on Tae's mind just like he knows that it's not just Noodle you were talking about. How many times has he seen you pull down the edge of your shirt over the past few weeks? Or reach for Hobi's baggier sweatshirts? Or sho them all out the door when you shower intent on doing it alone.
The pack loves group showers, there will probably be one on the way tonight from the sound of it. Yoongi doesn't doubt that the pack will leave you messy and sated. A little too sleepy too. Someone will have to help.
His fingers drum quietly on the bed. Nervous. Waiting. A little annoyed- but Yoongi's not sure where it comes from.
A loud slap from downstairs punctuates the quiet. Yoongi just barely flinches. And Yoongi wonders if you'd let them see you naked tonight or if you'd been too nervous for it. Or if Seokjin and Namjoon will make everything, your anxieties and your fears and your feelings of inadequacy, feel small.
They'll make you feel small too. Omegaspace is all but a guarantee tonight.
But he's not allowed downstairs to double-check that you're alright. (He is, he's just not sure you even want him downstairs- which is another thing entirely. Would his presence make you more nervous? More likely to go into appeasement mode because you think that's what he wants?)
Tae has a habit of reminding him when he's being a shithead.
Now Yoongi wishes for Tae’s attention to be elsewhere. On a poem. On Jungkook. On anything. Yoongi has gotten very good at lying to himself over the past few weeks. But somewhere across the lines I’m still angry at her, turned into I should still be angry. He’s not quite sure when that changed. But he knows he's holding onto his anger, that it's growing slippery, but that he's not ready for it to go away.
Yoongi will do anything to keep you, to make you stay. And that’s part of the problem. He's scared of his own capacity for forgiveness. What you might take if he gives you another chance. He's scared that you'll go and take all of him with you.
He's scared- sure, but he's not really angry anymore.
He's just tired- tired of feeling so much, tired of feeling things so intensely. Tired of worrying, of keeping you at arm’s length and wondering if I let you back in now have you learned not to do this again? Or will you just say you’ll change?
Yoongi will always love you- will always be your mate. But he doesn’t want to be sitting and waiting all the time wondering if you’re thinking about leaving again.
You’ve already tried to do that twice; the third time would be the charm.
Jungkook slumbers belly down in the nest, his soft huffs of breath coming frequently and at a steady pace. He’s quite a vision with his rippling back muscles and splayed thighs. With Hickeys on his skin from Yoongi's own mouth where the skin goes soft and dark. Knees apart to limit the soreness he must be feeling from the knot. Covered at the waist but only just so with a thin sheet. The tops of his thighs shiny with cooling slick. Yoongi’s eyes hover on Jungkook as he looks back.
Tae's voice keeps it hush, mindful of Jungkook's sleep schedule but not of the fragileness of Yoongi's heart.
"If you worry you suffer twice. Her leaving and you not forgiving her- isn't the result the same?"
Jungkook's sleeping form will offer him no savior from Tae’s words, he’d say the same thing- they all would. "Do you really want the distance she's been trying to give you Yoongi? Because I really don't think you do"
You've been fucking miserable these last few weeks. Is what she doesn't say but wants too. Yoongi knows it. Can taste the unfinished business on the air in the form of Tae's wilting rose and cinnamon scent. The heady horny edge to it wareing away.
It’s quiet downstairs but it hadn’t always been; between your pleas and Hobi’s growls and then your cries that had made Yoongi gnash his teeth. Sobbing echos that made Yoongi flinch. Distant cries of “m’ sorry m-" and Jin’s joining croon of “good pup, come to daddy, I’ve got you my sweet little thing, I’ve got you.”
But it’s quieting down now. Yoongi can only just hear a little bit of the hushed voices when he strains his ears. He can’t hear you at all when Tae’s talking.
Jungkook stays asleep, completely lost to the world, He needed two cocks to settle, Jungkook always sleeps for a long time after scenes, even simple cute ones like this. You’re the same. Yoongi knows you’re the same. That you usually doze after cumming, so sleepy- like your body gives up under the force of too much pleasure. And that even awake you’re pliant and drowsy. (He loves it when you get that way).
You’ll never have to worry about insomnia the way that Tae and Yoongi do. If it ever gets too bad, the pack will only ever fuck you to bed.
Which is why Yoongi’s restless, why he can’t sleep. Because you’re downstairs and not upstairs with him. He can pretend that's not why he's awake, but the truth remains. Eviscerated by Tae's pouting lips.
He heard you crying earlier. Coupled with Hobi’s yelps and Namjoon’s low croon. It was hard- harder than Yoongi expected, to resist the urge to go down to you. Grating, the mental equivalent of nails on a chalkboard to tune out the sounds of his mate in distress.
It's not distress, he knows that- logically Yoongi knows that the pack would never do anything you didn't consent to.
And still…
"That's not it Tae, that's not it at all." Yoongi denies, but the lie is blatant even to his own lips.
Yoongi is harder to settle than Jungkook. Tae knows this. Folded against the nest, her silky lavender dress pulled back on after fucking Jungkook, small breasts pillowing, hickeys dotting the top of them both faded and not. Some of them are from Jungkook- fresh and pink- but a few might be from you a few days prior.
She snorts, "isn't it? You're both just doing what you think will give you the least amount of pain- instead of actually confronting each other about this. Do you know what I think hyung?”
Just about every packmate has a newfound obsession with Tae’s chest. The tender swelling sensitivity just there. Tae hasn’t gone up a cup size in a few months, she’s a B at best- but the pack still praises her for it. Still takes every opportunity to make her blush and show her their appreciation.
But still- sometimes Yoongi catches her in the mornings, putting on her lingerie that she wears under her clothes almost every days-tugging at the gaping in the front. She bought stuff a cup size up at the beginning- so did Namjoon and Jin and Jimin, endless pretty sets from for love and lemons and Victoria’s Secret that sit unworn.
Because they don’t fit- might not ever fit. Unless Tae does something drastic like surgery. Yoongi's surprised she hasn't asked for it yet.
Yoongi sighs, frustrated, “What Tae, what do you want to say?”
Tae flips over on her tummy, hair a little messy, grinning looking a bit like Noodle as she strokes gently down Yoongi’s jaw. He’s not wearing a shirt he just tugged on pajama pants so the scratch of her long nails down his skin makes goosebumps erupt all over his bare arms.
“I think punishing yourself isn’t a way to rewrite history. Punishing yourself isn’t going to make what happened go away. At this point- I think you’re keeping yourself away from her to prove a point- but the points already been proven.”
“That’s not it,” Yoongi says again. Like repeating it will make it true. Tae raises an eyebrow at him, swishing her legs, her white painted toenails flashing in the half-darkness.
“Don’t you want to make her see that it was a bad decision, isn’t that what you’re doing? Punishing her for going and punishing yourself for not being there when she made the choice to go?”
As if on cue Yoongi can hear it from the ground floor, the sound of your babbling giggles- you in omegaspace surely, a softly crooned “Good puppy, give him another treat, he’s earned it.” From Jin. Yoongi knows you’re cute and sweet and sensitive in your headspace downstairs, the idea of seeing you- touching you- without the burden of all this- is so tempting Yoongi’s hands hurt.
Yoongi’s hands tighten around Jungkook's elbow, his anchor, preventing him from going downstairs. When Yoongi turns back to look at Tae, her eyebrows are pulled together and she’s looking down at Jungkookie. He has a single hand tangled in the hem of her nightdress, fist closed, chubby and cute.
“What are you thinking?” Yoongi is always in the habit of asking that. It’s worth asking- so that you don’t have to wonder.
“You remind me of myself before I came out. Denying yourself love just because you want to be right- doesn’t make you right, it just makes you less loved.” Her eyes flick from Jungkook up to Yoongi.
Yoongi's hands are cold, the goosebumps on his arms are still there.
Yoongi is not human without your love. How many afternoons has Tae seen him staring off into space? How many more meals will Yoongi push around the food on his plate? How many mornings will his hair go unbrushed because Yoongi simply doesn't have the energy to brush it? Tae and the others make up for it a good deal, but at the end of the day, none of them are the person who Yoongi bonded his soul too.
Tae knows what sadness looks like, what depression looks like and she's learned a lot from you. She won't let this be more than a little blip in Yoongi's year.
Your love is one of the things that makes Yoongi feel human. Without you to love, and feeling like he shouldn't, Yoongi's a little unmoored, a little without purpose.
Tae detangles Jungkook’s fist from her dress gently, replacing his grip with a nearby item- another one of her dresses that the omega had so diligently woven into the outer rim of the nest. He curls around it protectively, purring gently. She covers him with a different thicker blanket to simulate her warmth. Then she sits up on her knees and starts to shuffle to the edge of the nest.
“Come on,”
“But Jungkook-”
“He’ll be fine for a second hyung.”
Tae hasn’t yet conditioned herself out of using that phrase, hyung. And Yoongi might remind her if it didn’t sound so sweet coming from her mouth. More of a pet name than anything else. Yoongi doesn’t mind. She can still call him hyung if she wants. They’ve had conversations about it before.
Tae stops, and turns back. The language thing- is one of her current fixations at the moment. “It’s not- just because that slips out doesn’t mean I’m not still a girl."
“I know baby. I’d never think that unless you told me- not that you’ve got to- not that-“
“No, I know. Thank you hyung.” Tae's teeth worry away at her lower lip.
“You can use Oppa too you know. If that feels nicer, or you can go back and forth and use both.”
“I know, I don’t know why I don’t like it as much, hyung makes me feel like you’ll always look after me.” Yoongi grabs Tae’s hands, tangled in the sheets, silken, pink.
“You know I always will.”
Tae uses that hand to her advantage. Pulling him up and out of the nest. Tae leads him down the dark stairs, her quiet giggles softening Yoongi’s anxiety, but when he gets down there, you're there.
You're small in Namjoon's lap, resting your cheek against the hollow of his throat. The pack alpha's shirt is completely unbuttoned now and you’ve hidden your face in his honey skin, rubbing your face all in it, cheeks pink and slowly purring. Guarding your eyes from the big light in the kitchen- where Jimin is getting Hobi a glass of water. Pants pulled on just barely, still hanging low. The scar on his shoulder pink and catching the light- just barely healing. Big on the back side and small on the front.
Yoongi just barely hears namjoons low and sweet growls, his sweet nothings. The way he cradles you gently but so fiercely to his chest Yoongi knows it's all instinct.
"I'm never gonna let anything happen to you- never again- I've got you pup, I've got you. "
The shirt you wear is big and dark, he knows already that it's his- probably pilfered from downstairs to comfort you. Yoongi's not really sure why that makes his throat close up. Even around all of them, even after all of that. It's still his scent you ask for. The one that cloaks you and covers you in the wake of this.
It hurts a little bit more than it should that Namjoon freezes when he sees Yoongi standing on the steps. Freezes, arms tightening just a little around you as you continue to nuzzle into the pack alpha's throat, Dozing and lost in the haze of aftercare.
His arms relax when Namjoon sees it's just the two of them, and tae floats over, dress swishing. "Oh alpha- did you make her all small and soft for me?"
Namjoons teeth look extra sharp as he beholds tae, as she strokes down his throat. To have another alpha touch him there should feel threatening, but Namjoon just feels satisfied. "Of course I did babygirl."
Hobi is more awake than you but so much further down in puppy space than Yoongi expected. The collar jingles faintly against his throat where he rolls his tongue lolling out. Belly up on the carpet and clearly enjoying Jin’s nails scrapping and petting and scratching over his tummy. Never too tired for more belly rubs, especially with a full stomach full of good pup treats (they're just dog bone-shaped chocolate chip cookies, a special all-organic kind that Jin buys from Etsy explicitly for this).
He’s shy- Hobi hasn’t had the time to indulge in puppy space in months, but now he tucks his face under Jin’s shirt and squirms. Happy to be on the receiving end of the pack Omega’s undivided attention. “Good puppy- what a good boy-“ Jin croons, eyes glassy and dark, biting his lip as he watches Hobi squirm and his tongue lol. Panting animatedly.
He’s needed this too- the sound of his praises fall so easy and natural from his pouted lips. And Hobi stills, ears pink when he looks to Yoongi and Tae in the doorway. Lucid for a breath. Tae’s arms are looped around Yoongi’s hips. Keeping him from slinking off, keeping him from feeling like he’s not wanted.
The pack alpha pears at them over the back of the couch. His arms slowly relax around you, nostrils flaring at the scents coming from both of them but mostly Yoongi. Namjoon looks, and glares, but he can smell it. How upset he really is, the undercurrent to his scent. Yoongi smells like chocolate and worry.
He tips his chin down, a clear command to come here.
“Yoongi wanted to make sure she was alright.” Tae supplies, Yoongi tries to deny it but Namjoon already knows. Namjoon’s grumble growl is warm and inviting as Tae guides Yoongi to sit. Your arms are loose around Namjoon’s neck. He’s quiet, but his eyes are shiny with alpha space, measuring every one of their movements like the pack alpha might measure threats. Guarding the pup in his arms very diligently.
“She’s tired, fell right off.” jimin says, coming over to stand above the four of you and watch as tae guides yoongi's hand out, to touch your back, to pet up and down gently. Jimin runs his hand over your wet cheek, picking a hair out from between your lips.
“Poor little pup” and Yoongi feels breathless but Namjoon and Tae make room for him to sit close. yoongi doesn't need to be guided to sit close to you, almost sideways in something like a hug. You sag just a little more into him, like you’re relaxed by Yoongi’s presence alone. Letting out soft huffs of breath against Namjoon's chest, tiny purrs start up anew, louder, deeper. Your spine curls at an uncomfortable angle like you can decide between Namjoon's chest and Yoongi's hands.
And then Tae takes both of your wrists, detangling them from Namjoon’s neck, the same moment that Namjoon starts to lift your hips.
Yoongi can’t even say anything, can’t even protest as they put you in his lap. You suction to his front like a starfish sinking deeper into dreamland and going more boneless by the breath. Yoongi starts to say something- nothing more than hollow protests.
But it feels so good to have you hear, settled over his lap. So good his breath hitches.
Your hands tangle in the front of his shirt, holding on tight- like you think he might go even in your sleep. Yoongi knows you feel that he’s here- although you might not remember it tomorrow. Maybe that's for the better.
he hesitates for a second, and then pulls you flush against him, hard.
Tae settles behind him and namjoon behind you. His big hands forcing the collar of his shirt to the side so the pack alpha can lean around you and nuzzle into the hollow of his throat. He barely has enough energy in him to open his mouth.
How lucky you and him are to have 6 people to watch over you like this. To make sure that you wake up safe, that you get everything you need before you drift off. Yoongi doesn’t have to do it on his own anymore. He hasn’t had to in months but that still doesn’t lose its novelty. Yoongi wonders if he’ll ever take it for granted.
Yoongi breathes deep and even.
“Thanks, Tae.”
“Of course, honey. Remember for next time- alpha knows best.” Yoongi’s cheek rests against the top of your head, and your breath tickles his neck.
“I know we’ve got to go upstairs, but can we stay like this for a second?”   “Of course, honey.” Her fingers stroke through his hair, and Yoongi closes his eyes and tucks his face into the top of your head. One cuddle can't hurt. He can go back to being angry with you in the morning.
“You’ll stay like that until Alpha says you can get up.”
Tae’s giggle is sweet, Yoongi’s eyes are already closed, “Joonie-“
He can hear Namjoon's bashfulness in his voice, the kind of shyness that warms yoongi up from the inside out and reminds him that they're all still learning. “Sorry, I’m still- it’s still-”
“I know alpha.”
I know I know I know.
~-~
(Yoongi, a few days later)
(In the end, forgiveness is not something that is inevitable)
Yoongi doesn’t know that it’s a dream while it’s happening.
One moment he is entirely unaware, resting, asleep, at peace. And the next the nightmare climbs up the edge of his vision. Clinging to the darkness- dissolving like mist only in reverse. Like smoke sucked through a straw. Like burning- carving from the outside in, hungry and without purpose. Burning burning burning.
One moment nothing and the next there is so much red.
The first thing Yoongi knows is that he can smell something burning, he looks up and he’s in the living room of your house, no furniture yet. The inside is so white but not perfect- he can vaguely place the memory.
This is the way the house looked just after they finished re-plastering; Yoongi files the memory and finds its from months and months ago- during another spring. The floors are all fucked from the mess that the plasterers had left. White splotches here and there. Everything covered in ghostly white sheets, a drop cloth under Yoongi's knees that slowly bleeds red.
It's about a month before the pack came home maybe. The last month it was ever you and Yoongi and not You and Yoongi and everyone else.
Yoongi watches as the Flames lick at the white walls. There is something in his hands but he can't look down yet. Something- his brain doesn't want to look at it- it's easier to look at the flames. The fire is yellow and slow to hunger. Creeping almost lazily, like it has nothing but time to burn. He can do little more than watch, not too scared, just confused, as all of the hours and minutes of his hard work are eaten up by heat.
The fire comes from everywhere and nowhere- leaking silently up the walls, turning the plaster slowly from gold to brown, then black before it crumbles away into ashes. Slowly chewing away at the walls, and the windows. The doorknob rattles and somewhere close by Noodle yowls and scratches at something.
The next thing Yoongi knows is that you’re very very still. You’re not moving at all. Not even a little bit- those pupish twitches of your fingers or the wiggle of your nose when you scent his displeasure. Nothing. None of it.
Yoongi is holding you, you are so small, so fragile in his arms. Lighter than you are in reality as he shakes you and tries to get you to wake up. You smile in your sleep a lot, but you aren’t smiling now. The mating mark is blackened against your throat, a thin trail of black and red that rims your lips, bleeding down the corner of your mouth. Inky dark one second, bright crimson the next as a bit of blood drips down the side of your face. 
There is so much blood. It's wet and it's cold despite the fire.
He calls your name, and you don't answer. Yoongi's own voice sounds muffled, Warbled. He keeps talking. Unsure what he's saying. He shouts and screams. But his voice never gets louder, you never wake up. He yells as loud as he can and you still don’t wake up.
It comes all at once, just like the fire.
There is blood on your throat too, so much it can't just be from your mouth. Bright and ruby, slipping down your collar bones and the hallow of your chest. Welling out from somewhere- somewhere that Yoongi can't see. Where are you hurt? Where is it coming from? Yoongi can't find the cause of the bleeding.
There is blood on your arms- trailing to the hallow of your elbow, between your legs, soaking through the white of his shirt, heavy and sticky and warm. Yoongi feels like he's suffocating. Yoongi searches for the source of the bleeding, fingers ruddy, soaking into his palms and his knuckles. Frantic as he tugs the hem of your shirt soaked through. The shorts at your hips- all red.
There is so much of it, so much of it that it pools around the two of you on the floor, slow and lazily, almost taunting Yoongi- just like the flames. Yoongi can do little more but watch you bleed out and hold you through it. Hold you as you die. Watch the red swallow you until there's nothing left of you. Just blood-soaked clothing. His breath hitches, suddenly painful in his lungs and his voice comes all at once. So loud it hurts him.  
“Namjoon- please- someone help me- someone-”
Yoongi wakes in the nest completely alone. Jerking up so fast that it makes him dizzy. He's too warm. Hot and balmy. Sweat soaks the front of his shirt.
He pushes himself up in the empty nest on shaking hands. Blinking, looking around at the folded blankets, the pillows at the rim of the nook, the absence of any other living soul here.
(that's not entirely true, Noodle is perched on a nearby pillow purring loudly. That's as much comfort as he can possibly offer as he's sworn to hate his arch-nemesis for eternity. Even though Yoongi sort of gives the best chin rubs- although Noodle would never confess it and will take the secret to his grave).
The high ceilings are dark and hollow, the whole room drenched in that half twilight of closed drapes. Empty even though Yoongi looks- searching for his packmates, searching for anything to make his chest feel not so tight.
Noodle purrs loudly and blinks slow.
The Christmas lights have been turned off- probably to help him sleep. The light streaming through the cracks in the curtains is dissonant. But the room is quiet and cluttered- Hobi’s monstera looks freshly misted in the corner, and humidity clings to the windows and skylight up high.
Yoongi pulls himself up and heaves out a shaky breath. Chest tight. You- he needs to find you. Find you and make sure- make sure you're not- Yoongi lets out a shaky breath. A dream, that's all it was. Just a dream. But part of him can't believe it. What if it wasn't?
It’s still hard to tell. The panic won’t leave his lungs. At the front of his nose is the scent of burning things- and that is very very real.
It looks like the omega’s piled the blankets around him, a smaller ring of fluffy blankets to keep the last slumbering packmate safe from outside eyes. But with so many blankets- Yoongi has overheated. He's sweaty and sticky and gross feeling. He should probably shower before he goes downstairs, probably, but-
He needs to make sure you're alright, right now- before he falls apart. Noodle mewls lightly and pulls himself over to Yoongi, pushing up against his trembling fingers, licking at them until Yoongi scratches his chin.
It takes him a second, staring down at his sweat-soaked shirt- to distinguish that it is not blood, blinking and mistaking the light behind his eyes for red.
Yoongi doesn’t say anything and doesn’t call out for anyone. Can’t do anything but detangle himself from the mess of blankets and Noodle and follow the smell of burning things down down down the stairs. Feeling like a ghost with a bad taste in his mouth. A vague pressure behind his eyes and a numbness in his arms and hands from lying on them for so long. His blood circulates slowly and sluggishly.
You are standing on a kitchen stool when he skitters to a stop on bare feet at the bottom of the stairs.
Yoongi has to blink a few times to make sure he's not dreaming, that the walls are the same light pink color they always were. Not brick red but not creamy plaster white- off color like the flush at your cheeks.
The sweater you wear is Hobi's- extra big especially at the wrists, pulling down all the way to your elbow as you reach up to stop the beeping from the smoke alarm with a wave of a newspaper. Nose wrinkled at the smell of smoke. You don't have the crusties at your eyes and your skin is glossy. Seokjin probably did your skincare routine for you as the pack omega is prone to do with so much extra time for fussing these days.
There is no one else in the house but you. The top layer of the air in the kitchen is cloudy with smoke. Yoongi watches you and scrubs a hand over his face. You do not turn and look at Yoongi in the doorway, although you know it’s him just because you can sense when your mate comes close, either scenting him on the air or through the dull pulse of the mating park.
Your sense of smell has been getting a little bit better recently. Yoongi knows better than to chalk it up to your weight gain but your health checkup earlier this week had been a lot more promising than the one before. Yoongi had gone to the appointment with you, and you’d perked up almost immediately when you realized he wasn’t going to give you the distant silent treatment again, all but skipping into the exam room.
He’d even let you hold his hand while they took your blood. He’s never had the heart to leave you scared. Never. Not even when he's angry at you.
Your hormones are leveling out, although there are no signs of you going into heat yet. Another 3 months of no change and you've promised Namjoon to at least talk about hormone therapies.
Tae had reassured you that it wasn't so bad with a kiss on your forehead and a hand at your hip. Covering the place where you, like Tae, might one day receive the weekly injections by Namjoon's hands.
It’s daunting. The idea of sitting through the same kind of treatment that Tae gets; the clink of the glass bottles on the counter, the pearly sound of glass hitting tile. The cold swipe of a swab and the press of a needle.
Namjoon’s always gentle.
You'd be inclined to just leave it alone- but your doctor had been very insistent, something about possible fertility issues if you want to have pups one day.  It’s hard to get pregnant outside of a heat, nearly impossible. This isn't an issue that can be just pushed under the rug if pups are something you want to have with the pack someday.
Namjoon and Tae had perked up a little when the idea of pups had been broached. But Yoongi had remained at the fringes of the room- silent. Yoongi thinks about your scent changing the same way Tae's did- how it went from cinnamon and pepper to cinnamon and roses.
He'd never tell her because Yoongi would never want to make Tae feel self-conscious about her own much-needed changes, but he doesn't like the idea of your scent changing the same way.
Deep down Yoongi wonders if you’d want to have pups if it wasn’t what the pack wanted. He’s not sure he’d be able to handle it, a little bundle of you and him and the whole big fucking world with all its wicked people. Yoongi knows peace now but still doesn't trust it. Wouldn't trust it especially if it was just him and you and a little life- so unprotected and vulnerable.
Yoongi doesn’t like feeling this way; vulnerable.
He breathes in a deep breath of your scent, warm and sweet and slightly smooth, not frazzled or scared sour (the way he first knew your scent to be, back before he even knew that you smelled like cake and not rain). You smell completely unaffected, unworried, and unharmed. You don't smell at all like you would have in Yoongi's dream. You don't smell like you're dying.
So why is his heart still beating out of his chest?
He crosses the kitchen in a few shakey strides, just as you start to speak. “Hobi made pancakes but Jin and him started making out and they like totally forgot about them! So they’re out getting breakfast sandwiches, I didn’t wanna wake you so I just got you-”
Your voice cuts off abruptly as Yoongi lines his face up with your spine and plants his nose there, breathing in your scent once, then again shaky. Nuzzling into your lower back. Arms around your waist, gripping your hips.
You make a little noise, questioning, looking down at him with a mixture of shock and concern. and you should be shocked and concerned- it's been nearly a month since your mate hugged you- let alone clutched you to his chest like this. It’s roughly the same sound that Noodle makes when you wake him up with pets.
He holds around your waist as you stand on the ladder, three feet up. His hands tangle with the fabric at your hips. he blinks looking down and away, at the floor.
“Yoongi!? What’s wrong?”
Dimly, he's aware that he’s supposed to be angry at you. He flushes, the blood hot and pink at his cheeks. You’re not supposed to be speaking really- at least not about things that matter and to be fair- Yoongi cannot speak right now. Burying his face in your back until the feeling of your blood on his hands is a distant memory. Feeling the warmth of your skin until the idea of you cold and still no longer bothers him.
Not a memory- a dream. Not a memory. He has to remind himself a second time. Remind himself enough that by the time he doesn't belive it the space to answer your question comes and goes.
Your eyebrows lower and you set a hand on his head, threading routinely into his hair- long, shaggy and dark. And he pushes further into your skin and into your touch the same way plants press into sunlight.
Yoongi is so tired of being angry, he's so tired of being scared. Your hand touches his cheek and his eyes flutter. Lips parting. Namjoon cuddled him just last night- but Yoongi will always be touch starved just for you.
Your breath hitches, "Oh Yoongi."
his arms tighten around you, like he's worried you're going to slip through his arms like smoke. "Bad dream?" You ask, it's a state that you are only too familiar with as he hums non-committal. you turn around halfway so that you can put your hands on his shoulders and touch him. Yoongi almost wants to keen at the contact, almost wants to tell you he likes it too much- which would be embarrassing. He nods against your back.
He missed this, missed this A lot. He missed you. Yoongi's eyes are itchy.
This is the first time he’s held you since you almost left, besides that moment in the car when you were both so angry and so broken it hardly mattered. Yoongi swallows, and he still can’t speak when he tries. Hiding his face in your spine, your hip when you turn, back hugging you because even on a ladder he is still mostly taller than you. Shaking faintly, still shaking off the fucking dream.
His voice is croaky, not all there when his voice box finally cooperates. “Can you get off?"
You get down from the stepstool instantly. His hands tangle in the side of your shirt to steady you. Unwilling to go more than a few inches from you. You're always so wobbly in the mornings before you've eaten and Yoongi is ever mindful.
The sweater you wear has a small doodled bunch of flowers on the front, a botanical print. Yoongi thinks he remembers if vaguely- from a trip Hobi and Namjoon took to the botanical garden a few years ago. It's got holes in the arms like Hobi has snagged it one too many times on rose bushes. Yoongi threads his fingers through them and holds on.
You stare up at him from the floor like you’re waiting for his instruction. Eyes wide and glassy and pretty and alive.
Yoongi stills, breath hitching- at the sight of a bit of red on your lips.
It's off to the side, on your bottom lip almost hidden by where your smile sits. Yoongi's face crumples a little at the sight of it.
Yoongi reaches up with shaking hands to touch it, wiping it away. You follow his hand. He looks down at the smudge on his finger. The little bit of red.
“Oh! That was from Tae she-" You break off when he pulls you back to him, crushing you to his chest. And you surely can’t know what’s going wrong or what Yoongi’s just dreamed but you let him man handle you regardless.
He's sort of glad that no one else is home, that it's just you and him here for a few moments. The quiet of the house is all encompassing- beyond the sound of wind sneaking under the windowsills and the pitter-patter of the drizzle outside. Noodle meows dolefully from the stairs, coming to see why Yoongi had abandoned him so abruptly (the nerve of him.)
Yoongi rests his full weight on you, crushing you to his chest. You push his hair back away from his face, and Yoongi keeps his eyes closed like that will keep the feeling here for longer. Like he's worried if he opens his eyes the nightmare will be here again.
Your hands, his face, small fingers that push at the wetness that he doesn’t name dripping under his eyes. His breath comes out in short little gasps.
There is rain outside, pattering against the window. It’s been raining a lot over the last few days. Soaking the soil in the pre-spring cold. It won't be long now and everything will be green again. Hobi will plant the window boxes, and you'll be able to put the ferns out. You and Tae will start wearing your matching dresses all the time and it will become Yoongi's job to cut the watermelon because he's the only one in the house trusted besides Jin with the big knives. He'll cut up orange slices and peaches and strawberries too. Everything for his loves and their hungry mouths and hungry hearts.
Soon but not yet. Spring and summer are just around the corner but they're not here yet and yoongi is painfully aware of that.
You don’t ask him why he’s crying; you don’t look him in the eyes when he opens them, just continue your careful petting through his hair, eyes flickering up, then down and away. The twist of your lips is guilty.
You are not bleeding; you are alive and Yoongi cannot stand it. The weight of memories he didn’t live weighs on him, still memories. He breathes out a shaky breath. And double-checks his fingers are absent of blood after he rubs over your throat. Checking.
You pull at him, hands on his shoulders. “Come on-“
You pull him through the quiet halls, and into the room at the very back of the house. Noodle follows too with a jingle of his purple bell collar.
The windows here are cracked to let in the chilly spring air- pushing out the last mustyness of winder and bringing with it the smell of rain. The nesting nook is dark and cozy-tempting; but full of stuffed animals and extra nesting pillows that you scoop out of the interior and put on the floor with such care. Lining them up against the outside of the nook. All to make room for him.
Yoongi holds onto the hem of your sweater, rubbing a fist against his eye. Like a clingy child. But he has to let you go when you turn. he can feel the pout on his face and you reach up to smooth it out. You only pause for a second, briefly, “Do you want to tell me what’s wrong?”
Yoongi shakes his head, still wordless, unable to make his mouth cooperate. You don’t say anything, you don’t do anything but pull him into the warm dark quiet of the nesting nook.
Yoongi hasn’t spent so much time with you in here, but it’s surprisingly well-ventilated, the woven fabric sides of it dark but breathable. There’s not a lot of room but you make it work. Scooting back and pulling him down and down and down.
You pull him to rest against your chest, between your legs. Your hips splayed to let him curl up and nuzzle into you- in something like a full-body hug. Yoongi is too tired and too shaky to protest. He can’t even say he doesn’t want to but you check anyway- your movements slow as you get him situated.
Your heartbeat thuds quick against his fingertips. Yoongi wants to tell you that you don’t need to be scared, you don’t need to be afraid of overstepping. But can’t make his mouth cooperate.
His arms loosely circle around your waist, and then harder to crush you against him. At this position, you have full reign to run your fingers through his hair, over his shoulders, and down and up again. He knows he smells sweaty and probably rancid. But he nuzzles into your skin at the low neckline of the sweater. He puts his ear against your heart. Thud thud thud. Slowing down and evening out. You're right here and just under him, safe, and his eyelids are so heavy.
“Is this better? Do you need to go back to sleep?” Yoongi nods and doesn’t need to say another word.
Sleep rises up frightfully quick to meet him. He's not at all convinced that he hasn't dreamed it all. Finding you, coming here, and curling up. A dream within a dream. A good one in exchange for the nightmare earlier.
But this time he doesn’t dream at all, and even if he does, it’s only the sound of your heartbeat- thud thud thud. His own heartbeat thins out, and the tenseness in his shoulders relaxes.
Yoongi wakes up because a tomato has just fallen on his face.
You’re trying to be quiet, but Hoseok understandably laughs from where he’s holding out a half-unwrapped breakfast sandwich into the nesting nook for you to take a bite. Yoongi can vaguely place the words just whispered over his head. 'You guys eat without us, I don't want to wake him' 'Okay, but have a bite first- you know they're better when they're warm' 
Your laughter shakes against his cheek, your jaw clicks as you chew, and when he picks himself up, the tomato slides down his face, syrup slow. Until it flops against your throat. You and Hobi devolve into louder giggles and Yoongi can't stop the laugh that comes from his chest too.
The ruse is up, and you're all laughing. “Oh my god Hobi you promised to be quiet,”
Hoseok's one knee depresses the side of the nesting nook as he leans. Grinning down at Yoongi. Long fingers splayed around his ribs, making Yoongi shiver. The alpha pulls at his hips, and Yoongi feels a bit like a chew toy but in the best way, to be between the two of you laughing. “Come on Yoon- we’ve got you one too-“
Yoongi lets you both puppet him into the other room. Stumbling between the two of you. Until Hobi ducks low and nuzzles, and Yoongi just resorts to watching the two of you.
The way your hand goes from holding Yoongi's to touching Hobi's palm, then back to his like a bumblebee darting between flowers. A small smile works its way onto Yoongi's face. Even more when you pinch Hobi's ass and Hobi acts appropriately scandalized. Only you could get in on his and Jungkook's near-perpetual ass-touching competition.
(Yoongi's smile grows wider without him even realizing it).
There is a spread on the dining room, three heavy brown paper bags not just of breakfast sandwiches wrapped in checkered paper but biscuits in syrupy gravy, french toast sticks with honey yellow syrup, and a whole tray of tater tots that Jin pops into his mouth with a satisfying crunch. Half of the pack is still in their pajamas; it can't be later than 11.
Namjoon and Jimin are noticeably absent from the table- at work. But Hobi, Jin, and Tae are setting up the plates. Jungkook's already showered from his morning run- his hair all locky and tangled.
Tae looks a vision in a pair of flared yoga pants and Yoongi just blinks at her thighs, not realizing he’s staring until Hobi pinches his thigh for it. You laugh too and pull out the chair next to him with a squeak while Hobi hands out sandwiches and Jungkook cuts them into perfect triangles.
Yoongi blinks down at his plate, and he’s got a quarter of everyone’s sandwich on his, easily more than he can eat but still- You trade, cutting thirds and halves to try them all. Yoongi stares at them and feels fresh wetness on his lash line. Tae notices him staring, and she’s got sesame seeds stuck in what's left of her lipstick when she smiles.
“We didn’t know what you liked- so we got you two.”
And oh, Yoongi can’t breathe. The love in his chest bullies away the oxygen. How lucky he is to have people that get him two sandwiches instead of one, how lucky he is to have a house full of laughter and warm bellies and-
Hobi gets him a cup of coffee, Jin nurses his, thick-rimmed glasses and warm cheeks chubby as he looks across the table at Yoongi like he knows. He leans across the table to tangle their hands while he flips through his phone. Leaving the beta to his overfull heart.
“Tae- your nail appointment isn’t until 1- would you like Jinnie to curl your hair for you?”
“Can we try a new style this time? Space buns?” Tae asks so so sweetly- already wearing lipgloss even though she must have barely left the house. The smile never falters, just spreads wider when he stares at the glossy pink.
Jin hums, happy, "Of course."
"I love you guys" Yoongi whines. looking at Jin because he can't look at you. Telling everyone- because he can't tell just you. And really it's the truth. Jin blinks and looks up at him. A smile spreading on his chubby cheeks.
"Aw- someone's sappy." Hobi teases. "For the record, love you too"
"for the record; He just woke up" You peck the back of Yoongi's neck and shivers erupt all over his body. you lean behind him to swat at Hobi's shoulder. "Give him a break." The sound of chairs scraping hides Yoongi's whine and his blush.
"For the record, Love you too bun,"
Tae snorts, eyebrows knitting together as Jungkook sits on her lap instead of the chair right next to him. "Weird, but I like it" she pauses, "for the record."
Yoongi rolls his eyes, "oh my god stop-"
"For the record; Hobi started it."
"You guys call me bunny and bun all the time- I should be able to use it too!" Jungkook smirks, pausing for dramatic effect. "for the record."
Yoongi groans and you giggle. "Okay I'm done," Yoongi's smiling anyway
You sit, a little clumsy, and your coffee spills a little onto the dark wood table. Jin wipes it up with a tut, eyes still on the schedule. “There’s nothing else much for today just Tae’s appointment. Anyone else want to do anything?”
“Wanna cook together tonight?” You ask, Yoongi pulls your chair over to rest against his properly, he can still pull you over with little effort but it’s getting harder each day.
It’s a good sort of hard. You have half of a sandwich on your plate a quarter of Tae’s and another small corner in your hand half gone already. Yoongi should start working out with Jungkook- so that he’s as strong as you need him to be.
You look at him, and then down at your nearly pressing thighs, “wanted you to be closer to me.” He says, and then cringes, Hobi laughs at him and hits his plate with a metal clink. You just hum and turn back to your breakfast. Yoongi can see the smile in the curve of your cheek, can see it in full when he turns your face to wipe away the sesame seeds stuck to your mouth too.
"Yeah, what do you want to make Jin?"
You talk it through. You and Yoongi and Jin- easily launching into what you'll make, what you'll bake and barter for another night of full bellies and a full house of love. and although it involves a trip to a grocery store, it's easily set into motion.
Hobi asks you if you’ll walk with him to work today, he has to go in a few minutes and it’s not that far of a walk. 10 minutes. Half a mile.
But you say you’ll go only if Yoongi does too and he’s agreeing before he even realizes it. But as far as mornings go, walking Hobi to work and getting to walk home with you isn’t the worst way things could go. Not by far. Neither is the way that you tug his jacked tighter against his throat in the doorway of the flower shop. The roses in the windowsill all yellow.
“I’m really not all that cold.”
“Still, I always want you to be warm”
"I like taking walks after breakfast," you say after another few minutes of walking. Light. Calm. The cold air encourages more pink from your cheeks. The sun streaming through the leafless branches now that the storm has pulled off.
"We can do it tomorrow if you want." Whatever you want.
Maybe you’ll even hold hands (you will, Yoongi will reach for your hand first, and you’ll walk in quiet that isn’t so quiet all turn to you pointing to someone’s porch and the flowers they’ve already put out in their pots. Bright pansies, splotches of color among the springtime drudgery, and the million shades of grey and taupe.
“Do you think we can plant flowers soon?” Yoongi will say maybe, but Hobi will bring a flat of pansies home before either of you can text and ask.
But that will be later. For now, Yoongi just looks at you next to him on the dining room table, thumb rubbing up and down your thigh, forgetting to chew as he looks at you. Forgetting to take a bite of the sandwich slowly falling apart in his hands. The cheese and the egg sliding out. Both yellow, both yummy, both needed. 
Yoongi looks at you until Tae reaches over to pinch his thigh and he jumps. The egg in his sandwich slips out, hitting his plate with a slap.
Yoongi smiles, (really, the love is spreading like wildfire, slipping in through the windows like beams of sunlight, moving easily and unabated, like light through air).
“Eat your breakfast hyung- it’s getting cold.” She chirps.
Yoongi gladly complies, hungrier than he's been in years.
(In the end, forgiveness is not something that is inevitable. Forgiveness is something that you want to give, you have to want it with that person and they have to want it too. You have to give.
Yoongi will give and give and give.)
~-~
It happens on one of those evenings:
The nesting room is silent with the sound of sleeping packmates. The long curtains piled on the floor and two sets of bunny slippers sit unattended by the nest entrance because Jungkookie’s toes get cold sometimes and you like to match. His blue and yours pink. The Christmas lights up above are dimmed to a soft moonlit glow, lighting the bodies of your sleeping pack; gentle and heaped like sweet pavlova.
The door at the top of the stairs is open. There’s nothing to keep out tonight; no darkness or bad dreams. Nothing to fight off besides the vague feeling of childlike adventure that you gladly welcome inside. Not the sound of Noodle zooming around downstairs or the creeks of the house that’s almost finished.
Almost, it’s getting there. Yoongi has been working hard.
You and Hobi turn restless tonight. The only ones truly awake. Not with unease or with nightmares- too real and long gone. It’s not the memories of people with silver hair and dishonest smiles that keep you awake. Those villains are for dragons vanquished or papers in ashes that will never rise again to taunt you with their secrets.
There is no tower that you’re trapped in, at least not physically. Even mentally too. Any mental foes or sickness left in the confines of your head can wait until a later date.
Maybe it’s because of the full moon, the pearl bubble of your soul that matches and turns and keeps you awake, restless beneath the pink light. Maybe it’s because you both napped earlier with Yoongi in the nesting pod.
You’ve been doing that a lot more frequently over the last few days, taking little moments with Yoongi; spending breakfast in bed, cooking together most nights, sitting next to him always. Even small dates. Not even fancy ones but silly little outings that make you feel younger than you are.
Trips to his old coffee shop where he met Jin. His and Hobi's old record store, and Hobi's flower shop. Sometimes you leave separately and meet there to make it feel more like a date date. And Yoongi pretends he's surprised by the color of lipstick that Tae chose and you admire the ruffle of his tousled hair (he fussed with it for a few minutes in his car).
You'd never had a chance to date properly the first time.
It makes your relationship feel newer than it is. It makes you feel like you're making an effort instead of just having fun with your mate. It makes you feel like the drips of yellow paint on your sleeve- that had gotten there during the little sip and paint that you did last Thursday.
You'd gotten so giggly on cheap wine that you had to call Namjoon to pick you both up. You’d gotten handsy in the backseat and filled the car with the scent of arousal strong enough that Namjoon’s knuckles had gone white on the steering wheel. Barely a brain cell to scrape together to concentrate on driving.
Or the next day when you’d gotten dolled up just to go to different bakeries and sample cakes, eating them in the car with the windows rolled all the way down and the heat blasting. “This ones so good, have a bite.”
The two of you might be foodies actually, you might have found a shared hobby with it- testing pastries and food. You like the little things like fancy chocolates and fancy teas. It’s going to be your thing- the sweets. You can tell.
But for now, Yoongi sleeps peacefully not far from you as you look over at Hobi, eyes open in the darkness, face upturned, chest rising and falling just a bit too quick for him to be totally asleep. The windows are open and the night air is cool. You can press as close to the others as you want and you won't get too hot. You'd taken full advantage of this hours ago, snug tight under Namjoon's arm. His soft snore a special sort of lullaby.
You haven’t felt this calm in years. It doesn't make you choke up because you've felt this way before and you're getting used to it. The springtime air smells like rain, like the ocean already although you know it sits miles and miles away.
It might be another false spring- but the pack takes what it can get.
The nest is still quiet when you turn to Hobi and find his eyes open and bright in the darkness. Namjoon’s phone on the shelf reads 5:04 am. It's early enough to go back to bed but instead, you scoot over to Hobi when you see he’s awake, gently setting yourself first over Namjoon’s chest and then sliding down his other side to get to him.
Quieting Hobi’s sleepy giggles with an equally sleepy kiss pressed unhurried to his lips. His hands come up loosely to circle your waist, tired, sleepy. Your lips stay pressed for a breath too long. And Hobi shivers at the feeling of your warm skin pressed to his cold cheek.  
It’s still dark outside, not even the faintest breath of the sunrise cresting the trees. You lie there on your stomach, looking at him and stroking a hand down his cheek in the darkness. You just watch him until he turns at you. A bright mischievousness in his eyes. A bad idea or a very good one depending on how you look at it- cresting his mind.
“You know if we leave right now, we can probably get to the beach before sunrise.”
Bad ideas are made better when chased with dreams, it’s only been a month since everything went down, and maybe two since this got normal between the two of you. The kissing, the looks, the touching. That’s different, but it's still just you and Hobi.
He's still your best friend.
The softness runs a little deeper now. He'll always understand you a little better, a little more than the others. Although you'll give them a few years to try and catch up. Hoseok's love is a little softer, like a sunrise instead of a sunset. With no bursts of color just dark blue one minute and light blue the next, baby blue to blush tones to that weird yellow green of the sunlight.
You smile into the next kiss, eyes opening wider now, and you know you won't easily go back to sleep. “Yeah? Want to go?”
His kiss already tastes like saltwater. “Yeah, come on.”
Getting out of the nest without rousing your packmates proves to be too much of a challenge. (And really you think Yoongi would have a heart attack if you tried to leave without at least telling him where you've gone. He might have forgiven you, but you know better than to poke at his wounds.)
Namjoon groans while Yoongi blinks away the darkness behind his eyes, a big hand closing around your wrists, stopping you when Hobi’s already off the bed. “Pups? Where are you-”
“Just to the beach Joonie,” Hobi ducks to press a kiss to Namjoon’s forehead the same moment you kiss Yoongi’s lips, puckering in sleep and making a soft sweet noise. Your mate smells so good- rolling waves of sweet chocolate- so good that it has you not wanting to leave at all. You linger, kissing Yoongi again when the temptation becomes too much.
He opens his eyes and grins at you. "Want company?"
“You don't have to, we’ll be careful! Promise.”
"Where you going?"
He blinks back his sleepiness but no sooner have you explained what you're doing than are Yoongi's arms going around your waist to pull you in. Sitting up too at the same time. Careful to keep his voice low to not wake the others.
“Let me come with,” Hobi is already grinning, hair sticking up in the back after he pulls a sweatshirt over his head. Namjoon shimmies to the end of the nest apparently coming too- only to knock into Seokjin because Namjoon is always sort of clumsy in the mornings and he always gets a bit tangled in the blankets you roll up to construct the edge of the nest.
Jin’s plush lips pout, eyes squinting in the darkness, “Guys? What’s-”
Then Jin trips over Jimin's legs and the alpha shoots up straight, jostling both Tae and Jungkook (folded under either arm) and everyone is awake and sharing plans.
You tug on warmer clothes because Jin fusses; fuzzy socks, and thick cable knit sweaters. Jin doesn’t bother to put his contacts in, black-rimmed glasses balancing on his nose. A thick scarf that he won’t really need teasing at his rosy cheeks.
together you guide a soft and sleepy Jk down the stairs. Scrubbing at his eyes all puppy cute while you’re morning zoomy. Barely pausing to kick off your bunny slippers. Jimin gets down to tie Tae’s laces so she doesn’t have to bend over so early in the morning.
By the time you get down to the ground floor of the house, the light is already turning the sky a lighter shade of blue. And Hoseok is pushing everyone out the door, sometimes physically, with cries of “Quick! Before we miss it!”
For once, you don’t take two cars. This time you pile all in Hobi’s red car (thankfully gotten back from the police with all but minimal scratches and a hefty fine that Namjoon had reluctantly paid). You sit on each other's laps, ducking your head whenever you see oncoming cars in case they might be cops. (You haven't learned your lesson quite yet, but there is time- you don't have to grow up quite yet).
Tae sits on Jimin’s lap. Hands wrapped around her middle, talking softly over the color of her nails (yellow with chrome, making them look almost buttery). Jungkook sits on Namjoon's lap (the alpha tucks his face into Jungkook’s hair, a little long, a little shaggy, intent on going back to sleep.) And you sit in the middle seat on Yoongi's (playing with your mate's hands, turning them over and over again in yours, until he squeezes them lacing them through.)
The pack omega gets princess treatment on account of having the longest legs. Feet Crossed daintily on the dashboard where it not for his thick slides. Hobi drives and fucks with the playlist. But he doesn't need one. Leaves it alone for once in favor of listening.
Yoongi laughs and you ask him why he is. "Don't take this the wrong way but your ass is so boney, my leg is going numb."
"See! I told you you should come with me to pilates!"
"I'm no princess-"
"No- that's me." Jin snorts from the front seat.
"Joonie that tickles."
It’s only a 15-minute drive on the windy backroads, not so unsafe. Not so necessary that you’ll think about taking two cars and separating your little bundle of love into two places. Headlights crest the hills of shrub roses and shrub oak trees, leggy and just beginning to leaf out.
How is it nearly spring already? When did winter pass? Yoongi’s arms never release your waist, he keeps you like that, close and safe until you skitter into the parking lot.
Jin leaves his red scarf in the car. It sits there in the backseat, a heap of red thread whining over and over again, giving warmth that’s no longer needed. A string of fate organized and neat.
The parking lot at the beach is empty at this time of year and at this time of day. There is no snow piled up in heaps, only remnants in the forms of shallow silver pools and puddles that you traipse through with little regard to the state of your socks. The ocean air is warm, unseasonably so. You’re a mess of tangled limbs and pajamas. Laughs and- “oh my god I have to pee-”
Yoongi loses one of his slides on the way out and Jungkook steals it from the pavement. Running off with it and leaving him to hobble on one foot, only to bring it back after a second. And you let Yoongi place his hand on your shoulder for balance while he slides his sock back into it. Worried about getting his socks wet. His hair ruffled and eyes crusty but the sun-
The sun is bright and hot against your cheeks, wind whipping picking up your hair as it crests the horizon. You run out to the edge of the ocean, your legs fighting to keep up with Jungkook who's faster than you now that he's fully awake.
Water soaks pajama hems and you tread a little too close to the shore. It's low tide and the sea is far out. Sea spoils dot the wet sand, joining the reflection of the sky up above and the stars winking out one by one as the sky lightens slow.
You’re the first one to lift your hands, to shout and run as fast as you can (which isn’t very fast at all, so it’s a good thing they give you a head start) but the others follow without much preamble. Giggling and rushing to get to the sea in time.
It’s warm- the wind coming off the sea is warm and damp and lovely. Spring is here, happiness is here- and it might never be going away again. Not if you can help it and not if you hold onto it. You have seven other people to help you hold on tight and never let go.
No matter how hard it gets- you’ll hold onto it. You promise. (Promise me okay?)
Jungkook catches up to you first in the warm sunny sand. He picks you up and twirls you round and round. Shaking you a little, the same way that Noodle might shake a toy. You giggle, high and melodic.
You only see it for a second, spinning round and round- but the rest of them Seokjin, Namjoon, Hoseok, Tae, Jimin, Yoongi- they all stop where they’re running and watch. You’re dizzy when Jungkook stops, his grin pressed to your shoulder, arms hard under your shoulders. Clinging to him still- not putting you down because you’re dizzy and he’s still lifting you up.
“Jungkook- oh my god put me down- I’m heavy Koo- ” You’re a little panicked, a little startled, but laughing all the while.
“Not really. I can still carry you.” He tosses you up and catches you- shrieking even though you don’t really leave his hands. Clinging to him, scared of the weightlessness before he sets you down where you teeter, unsteady, dizzy but still laughing.
Your hands stay around his shoulders, on your tippy toes, and he raises his eyebrow at you.
The others catch up and Jimin leans down to squeeze around your middle. Salt air tickles your forehead.“You’re like hardly a work out-“
Yoongi’s teeth worry away at his lower lip, “guys-“
Jimin shows you it’s not a big deal by heaving you up and over his shoulder. leaving you shrieking again.
“Minnie no!”
"Minnie yes"
Jungkook and Jimin take off and Hobi and Yoongi chase them down, you feel a bit like a chew toy but in the best way, in the way that makes your stomach light and crinkly from the giggles and laughter. You end up with your knees in the sand and Jungkook against your stomach. Hobi behind you, hands fighting Jungkook's. wrestling over you until none of you have anymore energy for it. All of you are covered in sand but you're laughing so hard you taste salt.
You end up sitting there, at the edge of the storm line, where the sand goes hard and crusty at your feet but light and fluffy by your hands. You watch the rest of the sunrise like that. The good part. The best part when the colors bleed across the blue horizon line all yellow and gold.
Namjoon holds out a hand for Jin to get down, a bit more dignified than your sprawling mess of pups. And the pack omega leans sideways against Yoongi’s shoulder. Complaining squeakily about the state of his knees.
You settle against the sand. The eight of you curled close to keep out the last bit of cold. Eyes burning as you watch the sunrise and can't tear your eyes away. Until the sky turns that unmatched shade of blue, the kind that is never quite replicated by nature. Not in roses or daisies or in the color of people’s eyes. Everything blue blue blue.
Your sweatshirt is one of Yoongi's, the same color. Tae’s nails are that purple-blue too as she holds Jimin’s hand in the sand. The same color as the tiny piece of sea glass that Hobi pulls from between his legs because he somehow always finds sea glass. The best at finding lost things.
His hand slides around your middle, pulling you to rest firmly against the hollow of his chest. And his other raises to show you the little fleck of sea glass. Balanced on his index finger.
"It's a lucky find," you say. Hoseok hums behind you. Agreeing. Warm.
Later, you look over at him in the bagel shop (because if you’re going to have an early morning outing then it might as well come with breakfast and coffee.) You sit together with Hobi, Waiting for your sandwiches and your lattes.
Namjoon, Yoongi, and Jin sit at one table and bicker over the merits of avocado toast. While Tae, Jimin, and Jungkook take over the other playing some game that involves flicking a quarter over each of their sides and playing footsie under the table too.
Although Namjoon and Jimin will get frustrated and tug all of the red and white metal tables together before long- No one has the mind for it yet. All of you are still sleepy and pupish and young in a way that you haven't been, haven't felt in such a long time.
Growing up can wait for a day more, growing up can always always wait.
(You haven't thought about it at all today- what Geumjae did to you. You haven’t thought about the hurts in your past at all today and you won’t, the day will pass and it won’t weigh on you, you won’t even notice. That’s the way healing goes- you hardly notice)
(Later there will be food and you won’t think about eating it at all. Hoseok will make your sandwich up just the way you like it and you won't even have to ask for it. You'll eat the same way you love, messy like children but with so much hope in it.)
At the bagel shop, You’ll reach over and wipe your thumb across his lips to get some cream cheese off and it will be the first breakfast of many you’ll spend with him. How lovely is it- to get to spend mornings with the people you love? How lovely it is to lose track of the days and hours and kisses. To not count first kisses anymore and only count more.
You and Hobi are quiet where you sit at the metal tables, it’s not an uncomfortable silence, unbroken by ego or arrogance or anything of the sort. He looks over and smiles at you.
And because he asks, “What are you thinking about?” You give him an honest answer.
“Being at the beach like that,” Your hands play with the piece of blue sea glass he got you, your pockets are full of them because you spent a few minutes once the sun was up walking until the others called you back. Hand in hand, stopping only to pick up more.
“With the sunrise and the sunlight all around us, It kinda felt like the world was giving me a really big hug, do you think that’s stupid?”
(Neither you nor Hobi is thinking about what was done to you. Not even a little bit, not even at all. I hope you never think about it either. I hope you get to have days where you don't remember. Where you forget what it was like to need to be strong. May the prey animal part of you that lingers in your body and remembers be turned soft and docile with age. May you forget what it's like to be hunted and afraid. I hope you forget him. The man who hurt you. I hope you forget what he looks like and the sound of his voice. I hope you forget it all.)
“I don’t think that’s stupid at all.”
He pulls his chair over to your side of the table and puts his chair right next to yours so that your thighs can touch. Even though it’s a public place and even though it’s probably not appropriate. He pecks your shoulder and squeezes around your waist extra tight, grinning. It’s an awkward sideways hug but he pulls you as close as he can until it forces a giggle from your stomach. His palms press flat against your stomach and his thumb rubs up and down. Slowly.  
“In case you want one more, what’s another hug after all?”
~-~
Notes:
It's a sweet sort of irony, that this chapter is going to be posted when the people who live in the bily house are getting married <3 like what are the odds of that.
i think that this chapter is the real like- spot between the chapter chapters of bily and the epilogue! i think you can kind of feel it in the way that the chapter ends.
it's so like me to accidentally talk about tae's boobs for a few paragraphs i can't help it her tiddies are just so special to me. like 10/10, i saw a picture of dita von tess and just so you know...in my mind after tae gets a boob job- which she will- this is just me forshadowing it- thats the kinda tiddies she gets <3 cute lemon shaped ones!
the line about tae liking hyung more than oppa to use for the other members of the pack- is just kinda edgeing on an idea i've had for a while about my own gender thoughts- and thats that you can take what you like and what you don't like from each gender and make it what you want regardless of how you identify.
it's easy to forget that yoongi is also traumatized too you know? he needs so much hugs in this,
it always hits me how stylistically different i write the characters in bily- like this chapter i feel like i really got to develop yoongi's internal voice like- he's a very even cut of internal monologue, action, and sensation. different than the m/c who tends to be sensation first and then action, and jimin who is all bland sensation, and tae who has a very very strong internal monologue.
In many ways this chapter feels so like- stylistically light- like i think this entire series i've been trying to capture the feelings of found family- and you know-= this one gets alot of it right.
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drabblejester ¡ 10 days ago
Note
Ratio, Sampo, Aventurine, Jing Yuan and Mr Reca overhead reader feels about them (basically reader has a crush on them)
how VARIOUS HSR GUYS would react to OVERHEARING YOU CONFESS!
requested by: anon :3
pairings: ratio, sampo, aventurine, jing yuan, and mr. reca x gn!reader
content warnings: none!!
comments: im devouring a pizza rn as of typing this. its so good.. this one is also in bulletted list bc i didnt get any specifications sorry my liege<3
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AVENTURINE:
he overhears you talking on the phone in another room, probably to your friend. he isn’t one to eavesdrop but just this once…
he acts very calm about it, totally poker-faced to the point where you think he didn’t hear for WEEKS
until one night he asks you about it, and tells you to talk to him about it more later.
you fall asleep with him, and when you wake up, you tell him as promised!!
he still has to get used to people. y’know. liking him. so he’s a bit awkward for a while, but he warms up! sadly doesn’t soften up for a LONG while though
SAMPO:
he overhears you talking to an interviewer in belobog talking about a ‘handsome blue haired man’
first of all he is FLATTERED that someone in this cold world actually likes him. second of all he registers that someone likes him about 5 seconds later and panics a bit
truly, his whimsical and silly demeanor has captivated you! but it was meant to be for lying and getting away with things, not actual flirting. so he thinks he’s screwed
but he’s NOT screwed! he makes a plan to corner you later in the night to have a bit of banter, but you end up cornering him!!
you two talk for a bit, you talk about how cool and yummy he is. he says it back and you both end up having a great night! maybe a kiss or two persnaps…
DR. RATIO:
he accidentally peeks over your shoulder at your texts (god damn curiosity) and sees you panic texting someone about the Super Duper Hot Professor Man that just so happened to pass by you. and that’s now standing behind you.
now obviously you probably freak out because oh my gods thats the guy RIGHT BEHIND YOU. you turn around and stammer for a bit
sadly ratio just gives you a dirty look (not on purpose) and tells you to seek knowledge, not him. he winds up lecturing you about feelings and professionalism for a good 20 minutes
you go home and wind down for a bit to process the lecturing, and just hang out. you start to have some second thoughts about everything
until a nice little package arrives at your door, with a nice cooked meal and a note that’s a very passive aggressive way of saying ‘take care of yourself’
JING YUAN:
he overheard you gossiping with the guards, and nothing escapes his ears. he didn’t confront you about it right away of course, since he didn’t want to freak you out or anything
so instead, he just played the waiting game. he waited for weeks upon weeks, hearing all the thoughts you thought about him, and every little thing you tried to do to court him
and he’s flattered!! very flattered actually. he decides to eventually send a guard out with a hand written letter to you, simply saying to meet him at a restaurant he found out you frequented
you two meet there, talk for a bit, but not as a general and you. you talk like strangers but in the best way possible, getting to know even more about eachother!! you eat some yummy food and chitchat the night away
and eventually he brings you back to his place, settling you down with some tea and light snacks. maybe a few long-drawn stories to help you sleep. sadly (or thankfully) he ends up asleep before you, so you have extra time to admire him :3
MR. RECA:
he finds out through social media! you broke his ‘no recording in the studio’ rule, posted a blurry video somewhere, and went absolutely crazy over him in the caption
he’s upset that you broke his rule, but at the same time. thinks its interesting. he doesn’t do much else except revisit the post once more before meeting with you
you two meet up in his office, and he immediately brings up the post. of course you apologize so so hard about breaking the rules, but he waves it off!!
eventually the conversation ends up circling around to emotions (with a bit of help from memokeepering), and you spill all your thoughts and feelings right then and there. he’s slightly shocked, but it soon turns to a smile before politely telling you to leave his office
you’re definitely nervous, but it all fades away once you find out you’ve been casted in the main role alongside him! for better or for worse though, it’s a romance production. that asshole.
im fucking up this pizza rn my lieges its so yummy
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theoceansluvr ¡ 3 months ago
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Study Date Headcanons
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warnings; none ! characters; percy jackson, jason grace, + leo valdez author's note; did i technically write a study date fic already ? yes. did i write it with my big 3 ? no !! also i wrote this during breaks on my AP psych assignments so it's a tad bit wonky.. T^T
PERCY JACKSON -
oh boy.. you guys rarely get any actual work done-
but it's very fun either way !
i feel like he has a self established award system so that for every problem he gets right, he gets a kiss..
which usually just ends in him asking super easy questions he already knows the answer to in order to get one.
"hey, the answer to #5 is y = 7.5 , right ?" "uhh.. yeah ? you've gone over that like five times-" "crazy ! i got the answer right though SOOO"
very ineffective method, but you still fall for it
in the scenario where you do get some work done, it's usually bc both of you procrastinated super hard
(we hate deadlines in his household !!)
anywho, lots of snacks too ! like blueberries, blue cookies his mom made, other various things to yer liking !
amazing with science for whatever reason ??? so go to him for help !!
i give him aaaaa 9.5/10 on the study date scale: only productive when necessary but worth it for the kisses !
JASON GRACE -
the most studious person on earth, literally has never missed a deadline !
except that one time but that's bc demigod stuff
has decent handwriting ??(he was raised by wolves okay :c) but enough that you can share notes with having to decipher anything
really good in english but simply bc latin influences on it
will study for like.. 3 hours straight without breaks so you have to grab him by the ear to relax and drink something other than cold coffee and flat red bull..
takes a crap ton of ap and honors classes it's unbelievable, so def the man to go to for anything !!
ermm classical music or pure silence, no in-between ! unless you play the music which is usually what happens
makes you tea/coffee before hand since it helps him focus so he just assumes it'll help you
not necessarily a study headcanon but if you share classes he ALWAYS partners up with you !
anyways, i got sidetracked 10/10 on the study date scale: very productive evening !
LEO VALDEZ -
MY BOYFRIEND EVER !!!
another ap and honors class taker so pls ask him for help in literally anything !
ESPECIALLY MATH 🗣️🗣️
probably takes like.. algebra 2 freshman year
anyways, not the most focused person but he gets his work done super fast despite that !
fast and correctly might i add, like it pisses teachers off when he talks on class and is like "oh i already finished !"
makes you dance with him during study breaks :3 doesn't matter how late it is or if yer in the library, yer dancing to whatever music is playing in the earbuds you guys are sharing
if he finishes his work early he either helps you or just.. stares at you longingly ?? very sappy
he also draws all over his notes so good luck trying to read them !
he gets an 12/10 on the study date scale: im bias + i hate math and would kill for this man to help me with it.. T^T
THIS WAS ACTUALLY SO FUN TO WRITE- might start doing more multiple character works tbh.. anyways !! hope you enjoyed loves🩷 also it was very tempting to put connor in here :(( kinda wish i did but i have work to do !!
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theastrical ¡ 7 months ago
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their reaction when you’re sick.
genshin men reaction when you’re sick.
kaeya/diluc/childe x reader
note: hmmm i don’t know what i write
Kaeya’s reaction when you’re sick.
“hey what’s wrong? you barely talk or even move, anything you wanna share? moodswings?..”, his voice soft, mellow, something you can listen throughout even when you’re asleep.
kaeya is the type of person to be worried in the inside, he can keep his calm which is a good thing, but it kept you wonderingr, “does this man actually love me or is he good at hiding it?”. So when you’re sick, he keep his calm. He buys you medicines and leave for work. Although he seemingly left work early just to take care of you.
He would feed you meals, very slowly just incase you can’t keep up with your usual pace. Silently would observe your behaviour from afar, making sure you’re not consuming anything that would make you much more sick. He would hide your snacks and instant noodles, your sodas or bubble tea. He would also limit your social media screen time by going through your phone, cause you always play with your socials instead of resting. Anything possibly distracting your resting hours is a NO for this man, kaeya only wants you to rest, rest and rest.
The medicines he bought are various, either a herbal tradition medicine he bought from a liyue merchant, a modern capsule of paracetamol, or his hand-made herbal medicines. He made it so bitter that you could easily puke and he would feed the whole thing onto your throat so choking is an understandable respond. somehow his medicine works on you 10 times better than the others though. “My hands are definitely meant for this line of work, also for your recovery..hehe..”
Diluc’s reaction when you’re sick.
“you’re sick again..?”, a silent murmur he made when he saw how weak you are currently.
immediately knows when you’re sick, since he could remember any symptoms that you’ve occurred before. This is something he must remember (he thinks), since he doesn’t want to repeat another same-page of history. So when you’re sick, he didn’t panic, instead, he would let the professionals do the work instead of him, avoiding the worst possibility when he’s the one in charge.
would checked up on you every hour by touching your forehead, caressing your hands, or holding onto your hands. His touch is delicate, like a soft cloud scheming through your skin, not with his leather gloves, just the simple touch of his hands. It makes it hard to resist since diluc’s caresses are addictive, and at some point, you would find yourself waking up in the middle of the night just to search for his touch. “i’m right here…you’re cold..?”, then he would cuddle you, stroking your hair, and kisses your forehead.
when you recover, he would take you out to a fancy dinner, treating you for being good while having to endure bitter medicines or food you don’t even like just to survive another day. He spoils you with gifts and foods that you can’t eat when you’re still sick, it cost thousands of moras but it’s all worth it, at least for the sake to keep his beloved happy.
Childe’s reaction when you’re sick
“you’re not okay, let me help you.”, he would kissed your cheeks afterwards, to let you know that he’s here for you.
He can recognise your sickness just by seeing your pale demeanour and stiff body which is to him, is very visible (you don’t even remember how you usually look like before so he’s insane for that). he would checked it once more by touching your forehead or observing your body response overall, if his observation list are all check-listed then you are indeed sick. He turns into a full time caregiver, he has many job experiences, therefore entrusting yourself to this man is a good choice. In his mind, his number one priority is you, hence he would abandon his duty to take care of you until you fully recover.
He would cook a meal that can compete over 5 stars restaurant. It’s so tasty it’s insane that he made it with his own hands. The food is undeniably healthy, it’s only made with organic ingredients that he picked up from the local farmers, no preservative or artificial ingredients, all made with love using his own groceries. The food doesn’t taste bland, in fact it’s very flavourful, the food itself is already a medicine for his beloved since it consist herbs to strengthen the immune system. He would feed you, wipe your mouth, even help you drink the juice he made to make the recovery process bearable.
The medicines he picked are those that are meant for children but can be consumed for adults too, not capsules, but syrups. So you won’t be able to resist consuming since it doesn’t taste bitter. At some point he would bought the chinese herbs that are strong at taste..but he made the chinese herbs into food instead so it wouldn’t burden your tongue. The recovery speed is steady and fast, his way of making you heal is effectively acclaimed by his brothers and sisters. After every medicine or food you eat, he would kiss your hand and carry you to bed again, covering you with a blanket and help you sleep. Singing a lullaby for you and makes sure that his company helps your heart relaxes.
“rest well, i’m here.”
taglist: @dailypenpen , @daydreaming-paradies
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rosedere ¡ 6 months ago
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The Liyue Lotus and the Merchant from Snezhnaya
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(Pantalone x Fem! Reader)
MDNI +18
Cw: kidnapping, Stalking, non con elements, Graphic violence (later chapters), Yandere content *will update as the series goes on
Cross posted on AO3
1.The White Lotus (you are here), Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10~
Synopsis: Unfortunately, The Regerator develops a fixation with you while you are working undercover for Yelan. And there’s no one who can get in his way of his prized Lotus.
-
So delighted
Drowning in happines
Floating
Far and wide
Only with you, we'll be as one soon
If it's in you, you will be loved soon
Only with you, we'll be as one soon
Baby, won't you fall in love?
You had been watching the harbor all day.
This is normally a task you complete on the regular, but today was even more urgent than usual.
Taking a dainty swig from the steaming tea in front of you from where you sat in the middle of the crowded storyteller's crowd, blending in with most of the audience, you had a perfect view of where your target was rumored to be.
After the failed mission holding Theofan in custody by your boss and the traveler, you and your bosses subordinates were sent to the shadows to find where your person of interest was.
It had just turned noon, and the skies were carrying a warm breeze singaling the change from spring to summer as you kept your eyes on the busy streets for anyone matching his description. 
Taking another sip, you looked back around behind you observing the scene before you.
The storyteller was retelling some story youd heard 50 times in the few weeks you'd been sent to watch this particular area for your target.
Everyone around you was focused on the storyteller, with a few enjoying the tea or snacks they bought from the various stalls below.
No one would suspect you were the white lotus.
The highest-ranking subordinate of Yelan's intelligence gatherers—at least thats what Yelan and Ningguang named you.
Only they knew your true name.
After finishing your cautious observation, you went back to looking towards the street for the umpteenth time this day.
A shiver ran down your spine before you saw him.
“Is this seat taken, miss?”
At first, you didn't react at all to the voice, assuming it wasn't directed at you. There were many openings in front of you anyway; it seemed silly to want to be in the corner. You weren't seeing much of the storyteller's flamboyant performance anyway.
A tap to your shoulder was what made you completely aware. Looking up you saw him towering before you.
He was wearing clothes that were not at all what you would wear in the warm season: a long dark coat with purple accents and various dark insulation on the coat he wore, his hair curled and falling past his shoulder tied back with his glasses sitting perfectly on top of his nose. He also wore dark layers, with a turtleneck being the most visible one you could see.
He had no vision, which was a good sign. If things got ugly, you could immediately overpower him with your bow tucked behind your clothing.
You didn't react, keeping your poker face, before replying to his question.
“No, go right ahead,” you plainly responded towards the man. 
He pulled the chair to sit next to you before sitting too close for comfort in your personal space. His cologne assaulting your nostrils didn't smell of the usual Liyue scents that were made into perfumes and colognes; it smelled cold and spicy with little to no musk foreign.
You decided to look towards the storyteller, looking beyond the screens surrounding his stages towards the safe point at the top of the Yangshang teahouse.
Yelan should be there.
“My, I've never seen you around here; is this your first time in Liyue?” the man asked.
You knew he was watching you.
Despite being undercover and being familar with disguises, acting was not your strong suit.
To be honest, you never had a situation where someone approached you in your disguise in all your 10 years working under Yelan.
Saying nothing would lead him to grow suspicious, but you didn't know what to say to the man.
“No, I was born and raised in this harbor,” you curtly responded, grabbing your tea and taking a few sips.
“I guess it was my lucky day then to run into a beautiful glaze lily like you in my path,” he said with a smile curving his lips.
He was definitely up to something.
“Thank you; I wasn't aware I'd run into you either.”
Very unaware
“Have you ever heard of the Northland Bank? Miss...” he began. 
“Lián”
He smiled once more at you, crossing his hands under his chin.
“A beautiful name to fit an attractive face,” he said.
“I'm in charge of the Northland Bank; although I'm normally away to my motherland, I had to stop by to help a few subordinates, so I'm in the area for another few days,” he rambled.
Northland bank
You felt a chill rise up from your arms.
This was now escalating from an oblivious civilian blowing your cover to possibly something even worse.
Swallowing the bile from your throat, you tried to keep your composure.
"Oh, so you're not from Liyue?" You asked casually.
“I consider it a home, but I practically live in Snezhnaya nowadays,” he smiled.
“Interesting, I've never been that far; the furthest I've gone is to Chenyu Vale,” you replied.
Sipping half of your tea, you wanted to finish the cup before you had to flee.
This situation was out of your control if you said the wrong thing. The fatui were not to be messed with in the slightest.
Especially if he's who you think he is.
"Well, maybe we can go together one day; I'll have to warn; it's colder than you've ever experienced before,” he chuckled. You smile at him but decide not to respond any longer.
You hoped that if you kept staring towards the teahouse, Yelan would sense your Mayday plea.
Taking another sip of your tea, you snuck a glance besides you, only to accidentally make eye contact with him.
Great
"So, Lián, tell me a bit about yourself,” the man asked, tracing a fingertip idly on the redwood table next to you.
“What brings you here? I come every time I'm in the harbor, and I've never seen someone as eye-catching as you before,” he purred.
“I normally don't come here; I decided to come on my day off..” 
"Pantalone,” he answered with a sophisticated tone.
The inkling of dread tickled the back of your head as you heard those words.
The Regerator
You needed Yelan immediately.
“Pantalone—it sounds like a name I could hear the owner of the Northland Bank having,” you giggled cutely.
He seemed to have liked the reaction from you, at least since he only had a toothy-looking grin.
"Well, I'm glad you like it,” he said.
"So, where do you work, Lián?" I'd feel terrible if you were right under my nose this whole time.” 
“I work as an apothecary at the perfume shop.” You took another sip, leaving at most two sips left.
"Well, now I know where I need to stop more often," he said in an upbeat tone.
You glanced back at the roof to see your holy grail.
Yelan was watching from the rooftop now.
You got up, holding your tea cup in hand, and scooted the chair back.
“I must refill my teacup with more of this tea.” 
“Sorry”
You didn't look back at Pantalone before you weaved your way past the tables towards the street below.
As much as you wanted to hasten your pace, you couldn't alert him; you just had to hopefully distance yourself and make your way back to headquarters across the way.
Looking to the left and right of the bustling street, you went towards the bridge leading out of Liyue. It was a secret way to get to headquarters without alerting anyone you remembered being told in case of a situation such as this one.
“Lián”
You tried to ignore him once again, walking towards the safety of the bridge a few feet away.
You felt a hand on your shoulder curled firmly on your cloak.
Of course, turning around, you saw Pantalone humbly smiling down at your shocked face.
“Where are you going in such a hurry? I don't mind accompanying you wherever you go.”
Something was wrong.
Your fellow shadows were nowhere to be seen, despite Yelan spotting you in a compromised situation a few minutes ago.
This could end really badly if you can't shake him.
“I'd love for you to come with me, but I must hurry to Chenyu Vale for something urgent,” you sternly said.
“I don't mind coming along,” he said, too quick for your liking.
“How about this?” you said, grabbing the gloved hand perched on your shoulder in your tinier hands.
“Why don't we meet tomorrow near the harbor strip? We can talk all evening if you want.” You flirted.
Blegh
But anything to get him to fall for your trap.
“If you promise it, Lián,” he eagerly replied.
“But I'll tell you this now– I don't like deceivers or anyone who goes back on promises,” he chuckled darkly.
He tucked a strain of loose hair behind your ear as you looked up at him with your faux grin.
“I promise,” you said, holding his hands in yours.
You then quickly sprinted into the mountains, still feeling the allustrive eyes of pantalone on your compromised figure.
You didn't stop until you were in the Chasms maw.
-
“Respectfully, why the hell did you all not save me?” You shrieked in the dimly lit wooden room.
Yelan was sitting across from your now uncloaked body, revealing your brightly lit cryovision on your back, while your three coworkers idly sat next to her poised figure, idly swirling a lemon in her water.
“He was about to follow me into the mountains, and god knows what to me, I think he suspected I was working for the Tianquan,” you paced back and forth once again.
“You always said in a compromised position we'd have to lead the person of interest far from-”
Yelan put a hand out in a way to silence you.
"(Name), you know we wouldn't have let it get that far; he wasn't showing signs of being a hostile target from what Fa reported.” 
“He actually seems to be attracted to you, if anything,” she said, curling her lips into a cheeky smile before taking a sip of lemon water.
“This new development can work in our favors; we just need you to resume playing your “Lián” character, don't you think?” She smiled at you.
“But why me? Surely we can't recruit another one of the agents to do undercover work; I don't do that,” you remarked.
“If we got another agent, he would grow suspicious, and that would arguably throw you into more danger,” she sighed, resting her hands under her chin.
“You don't have to worry; we can get you a disguise by tonight, along with new rooming accommodations and your fake occupation.” Yelan looked sharply towards you, who was anxiously pacing in front of the table now.
“Ill only do it if you guarantee you'll have eyes on me the entire time—I dont trust those fatui scum,” you pouted, crossing your arms.
“Trust me (name) if you pull this off, this will be the biggest arrest in all of Liyue." Yelan smoothly replied, “You'd be in the history books for sure.”
“So cheesy,” you puffed your cheek out.
“All I ask is that you not sleep in my bed while I'm gone.” You narrowed your eyes toward her.
“No guarantees,” Yelan casually said before crossing her arms behind her head.
You only rolled your eyes before you decided to leave for the evening.
The wall back to your home you shared with your unofficial roommate felt like it was drawn out more than usual.
Making your way towards the food stall you frequent.
However, you couldn't shake the feeling of being watched as you gave your mora to the food stall owner.
Quickly grabbing your dinner, you took off towards the street leading to the small, tucked-away home you shared with your boss.
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Notes:
Sorry about the shortness! Im just afraid of word vomitting every single chapter haha
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lilspacewolfie ¡ 9 months ago
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Papas Caring For Hospitalized Reader
Spawned from pure self-indulgence. I've been through more hospital visits these last four weeks than I have my entire life. I want someone to bundle me up and make my hand better. I hate hospitals and operations *sobs*. Enjoy nonetheless!
Content: 2k words, Papas x gn!reader, SFW, bullet-pointed format, mentions of hospitals, needles (only mentioned), mention of general anaesthetic, angst, hurt/comfort, anxiety, lots of sweetness, you're getting pampered, no beta we die like nihil!)
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This man will do everything in his power to make sure you’re looked after and relaxed. 
Tea for days! He will try different flavours until he finds the one you like.
Dives headfirst into deep research as to which herbs help your injury heal, as well as calm your nerves. He knows his plants well, but he wants to know more. You deserve the best of the best.
Insists on going with you for infirmary visits even when you tell him you’re fine (you’re not really, but you just don't want him to worry.)
He will anyway. 
Chronic worrier, especially given his age. 
He takes his health VERY seriously, yours too! The Ministry has the best medical care around. 
If you need a wound cleaned, stitches taken out, or other medicines, it's the place to get it. 
Primo will be with you as much as he’s able to, even if that means he’s sitting for a long time while you’re being treated. 
When you’re free and discharged—bandaged, bruised and probably feeling sore, he’ll take you back to his room for some TLC. 
Will have a bath or shower with you, (in his jungle of a washroom), depending on what you prefer and smother you with all your favourite scents.  
He’s a deeply caring individual and shows it openly. 
Will speak gently to you, whisper sweetly and ensure you’re not overstimulated more than you have been. 
“Shh, I know. I know amore. It’ll be over soon, just breathe for me.”
He knows how much you hate hospital/doctor visits. 
You can squeeze his hand if you want. 
If you need space for a bit after everything, he’ll gladly give it. 
If not, prepare to receive a lot of kisses, especially on your forehead (a lot of them, like… SO many.)
He will help you bathe if you’re unable to, running a foaming washcloth over your skin carefully. 
Let him wash your hair! It’s one of the things he adores doing for you!
Once you’re washed, warm and feeling more relaxed it’s time for more tea in bed with a snack if you want one!
He insists. Even if you don't feel like eating, try to drink something for him <3
“It will help you feel good and relax, Il mio fiore.” (My flower)
Fluids are important (wink-wonk).
Reminds you to take your meds like clockwork (always with tea and water)
You’re his petalo (petal) and he loves you dearly. 
Will wrap you up in the mountain of blankets and faux furs he has on his lush bed. He’s old, he feels the cold more than others. At least he has you to keep him warm.
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Secondo hates when you’re hurt/hurting in any capacity. 
Even if it's something minor, he’ll worry about it to the point where he loses sleep over it. 
He’s a big, brooding mother hen. 
The Emeritus curse of being a chronic worrier doesn’t stop at Primo.
This man wants you to be okay and it kills him when you’re not. 
Will also go with you to the infirmary and stay with you. 
The staff always find him a little intimidating, but they know he’s just worried sick. He’s kind to everyone, but honestly, he won't speak much unless spoken to. 
“Are you alright, mio tesoro?” Is what he mainly asks, his voice so low it's close to a rumble. 
Tries his best to make you feel relaxed. 
Will make really, god-awful dad jokes that are so bad you do laugh. 
He will quietly hold your hand the entire time, rubbing his bare fingers over our knuckles. 
You rarely see him remove his gloves in public, but he HAS to be touching you. He insists. 
He’s had enough knocks and breaks in his life to know how fragile the human body can be, but also how incredible it is at self-repair. 
That doesn’t mean he views you as a fragile thing that needs to be wrapped in wool, but he loves you so deeply he would if you let him. 
He admires your strength and resolve as you put up with being poked and prodded (by needles or with doctors.) 
Once you’re released from care, good luck getting him to be anywhere less than within touching distance. 
You’re getting a kiss. Lots of them. Mostly chaste and gentle. 
You can tell it's because he worries about hurting you. 
He relaxes a bit more when you kiss him HARD and bite at his bottom lip. 
Will also help you bathe and shower. Again, touching distance. Just let him be near you for his own sanity. 
Though he wouldn’t be upset if you need some space. He’s very understanding if you’re overstimulated. 
Will linger outside the door in case you need anything. 
Let him dry you off and dress you in comfortable clothes. He can see you that way. 
He can see you’re still with him and that you’re safe. 
He’ll touch you slowly, running his large hands over your skin. 
Will spoon you once you’re in bed or let you curl into him. 
He’ll bury his nose in your hair, breathe you in and say a wordless prayer to Lucifer that you recover quickly. 
“Ti amo.” You hear him whisper as he presses a kiss to your forehead and strokes your hair.
Only falls asleep once he’s sure you have, holding you close the entire night. 
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Terzo. Oh, Terzo. 
Emeritus curse of being a chronic worrier? Check. Turn it up to eleven. 
Unlike Secondo, Terzo is open with his worries. 
He’s a fair mix of his brothers, both gentle and occasionally stoic given the shape you’re in. 
If it's something minor, he’ll try to play it off with a bit of humour like he tends to do. He’ll make bad jokes (oh ho, you thought Secondo’s were bad just wait for this.) 
If it’s something you need an operation for, this man will be silently out of his mind. *insert any internally screaming gif here*
He takes pride in his appearance, but you’ll start to notice cracks—dishevelled hair, a button not done up or a smudge of his paint. 
It would worry you more if he didn’t have Omega or one of his brothers to make sure he’s drinking and eating regularly.
Tries to hide his stress. Fails. Rinse and repeat. 
He doesn’t want you to worry about him, you’re the one in pain, about to be put under and Lucifer… What's he going to do if something happens?
He loves you. Adores you. You’re his life.
He knows how much you hate being stuck in hospitals and it pains him to see you stressed. The last thing he wants to do is add to that, so he’ll play it cool. 
When you go in he’s pacing the halls.
Rest assured, the healthcare of the Ministry has you in safe hands. 
It puts Terzo at ease, but don't expect him to leave your side when everything is over. He will sit at your bedside, kiss your knuckles and stroke your hair. 
Let him touch you. Just let him. 
He’s been through so much heartache in his life. 
Will kiss each of your fingers and whisper sweet words to you. 
“You’ll be okay, vita mia. Cuore mio. I’m here. I’m with you.” (My life. My heart.)
Maybe he’ll hum some songs too. 
You’re his everything. 
Once you’re ready and well enough to leave, you’re getting pampered to hell and back. This man worships the ground you walk on. 
Whatever you want it's not too much. A bath? A shower? Just to get into bed and fall asleep? Terzo’s right there with you.
Dinner in his massive, plush bed with your favourite movie.
When you’re ready to sleep he’ll plaster himself to you. He would crawl inside your skin if he could. 
Fitful sleeper. Wakes up a few times just to make sure you’re ok. 
Eventually sleeps soundly once you kiss his worries away. 
Stroke his hair. He’s a sucker for that!
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*Copia is not Nihil’s son in my verses/AUs unless explicitly stated.*
He’s learned bad habits from the Papas it seems. 
Worrier. Yes, it's chronic. Seriously, are we sure this isn’t like the flu?
Paces a lot. 
Good luck getting him to sit still. 
If he's not pacing, he’s as close to you as physics will allow. 
Lots of touching. Will rest his head by your hip if he’s tired from all that pacing. 
Perfect opportunity to run your fingers through his hair.  
He’ll hold your hands and kiss your knuckles. 
All that stress tires him out. 
“Mi dispiace, amore. Non sto aiutando,” he’ll whisper brokenly. (I'm sorry, amore. I'm not helping.)
You two probably end up curled up on the bed of the infirmary together if you have been waiting a while. A nap won't hurt. 
You kiss slowly as you get comfortable, limbs tangled.
The angle is a bit awkward. 
The sleep helps but he’s still going to be stressed when he wakes up. 
Will get you anything you need. A drink or food, perhaps one of the really nice yogurts they do at the visitor's cantine. 
Will ask the nurses and doctors SO many questions. He likes to be informed. Gets stressed if anything is unclear. 
Maybe he should be in this infirmary bed and not you. 
Prepare to be coddled once you’re discharged. 
You’re both taking a long, hot bath or shower. 
He wants to wash you down so he can see you and make sure you’re ok. Lots of tender kisses to your skin. 
Ends up with you in his arms under the hot water just swaying together. 
You’re wearing his clothes. No, not just because he likes how they look on you but because they’re baggy and won't irritate your skin *cough*. Sure Copia. 
He’ll order your favourite food and you can watch a movie in his room together. 
Will mother hen you, constantly ask if you need anything, and make sure your water glass is full. 
He probably will cry. It’s just been so much. 
You can cry together if you want. You both understand. 
Also like clockwork when it comes to medication (if you’re taking any.) 
Curls up in bed with you. You both sleep like the dead after such a long, stressful day. 
Breakfast in bed when you wake up.
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*Copia is not Nihil’s son in my verses/AUs unless explicitly stated.*
Copia might not be of the Emeritus blood, but unholy shit does the curse of being a chronic worrier catch like wildfire. 
He’s Papa now he’s gotta be strong. 
Will put on a brave face. But underneath he’s still the cardinal he was years back. 
He’ll worry and fret and pace. There's no changing some things. 
While he’s outwardly less anxious, this poor man has so much weighing on his shoulders after he took over to front the band. 
Inwardly it's chaos. 
His hair is never quite as smoothed back as it normally is and his paint is a touch worn. 
There are some things you can't change about a man. Not really. 
Prepare to be coddled, again. The mother hen has never left the coop. 
He’s going to pamper you when he gets you back to his room. Of course, you’re staying with him, he’s not letting you go. 
So. Many. Kisses. 
This man loves kissing you. He adores you so. 
A bath in his spacious tub is just what the doctor ordered. You lay against him and relax in the dim with only the light of candles. 
Finally lets himself cry. 
You shush him, kiss him and remind him that you love him and that you’re ok. 
He loves you so much he can't even express it. The thought of losing you kills him. 
He tries to push your hands away when you take a cloth to his paint. You’re the one who's been hurt and poked at all day, he’s supposed to be caring for you!
Eventually relents because you both know you need this. 
More kisses and mutual washing. You love seeing how his skin pinkens across his cheek, arms and back. It brings out the pretty freckles all over his body. 
When you both get into bed, tangled up again, Copia will whisper how much he loves you until he’s too tired to talk anymore. 
You both sleep like the dead.
masterlist ⛧ Ao3
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