#alinas fanfic
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thechaoticrow · 2 years ago
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for people who haven’t read the shadow and bone/ six of crows books, but have seen the show:
- inej ghafa is a survivor of childhood sex trafficking. she has ptsd and reacts in a panic attack at even walking past the menagerie
- kaz’s trauma isn’t just pekka rollins being responsible for jordie’s death, and waking up on the barge. he had to swim to shore, age nine and barely alive, using jordie’s body as a float
- the darkling has done far worse things than are shown on screen. he is not a ‘lost man’ and alina is not his ‘balance’
- alina was seventeen upon the darkling being nsfw/ romantic with her
- matthias helvar did not lead drüskelle, that was jarl brum- matthias is only just barely an adult himself
- the crows are not their own separate gang, they are part of the dregs, who per haskell leads and kaz takes over from haskell after haskell sold out his lieutenant (kaz) to pekka rollins
- zoya, genya, and alina have personalities outside of either being traumatised or hating each other
- alina never wanted any of the power and fame and idolatry, and in the end of the books is stripped of it all. she is very happy about this
- jesper is a gambling addict and somebody who watched the death of his mother
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yawnderu · 7 months ago
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A rainy day with simon would be amazing...
Him and you are covered by big blankets, body tangling each other and slowly caresses🥺🥺
Simon is easily the best cuddle buddy you can ask for. His burly arms are wrapped around your body, a blanket keeping you safe from the coldness of the room threatening to bite at your skin. Simon's thin, pink lips plant a succession of gentle kisses on your forehead, his hands absent-mindedly running up and down your back, spreading his warmth all over.
“I missed you.” He leaned down, brushing his lips against yours in a tender gesture that spoke volumes. You were a testament to his new life, one built on the ashes of the old, and in the aftermath of the hell Simon Riley lived through, that was enough.
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emptyportrait · 9 months ago
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ship so good they yearn for each other without even knowing one another's existence
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serpentthecrow · 2 months ago
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Sleepy time with the grishaverse characters
A/n: I... Don't even... Sorry about that. My executive dysfunction did its magic. But here you have this as a peace offering since you guys liked the crows one. I can't even believe how long it's been. I'm probably not going to keep writing too many fics, if any at all. But this one's mandatory. And short.
Summary: headcannons on the sleeping habits of (some of) the grishaverse characters.
Alina Starkov
Hear me out
The girl's out like a light
Exactly the type of person to roll around the bed, end up in peculiar positions, and mainly, accidentally slap you or kick you in her sleep
Isn't picky, but if she COULD choose- only the softest mattress, duvet and pillows
She's petty like that
Has absolutely no night routine. Like. NONE.
Owns no pajamas. Just normal clothes passing as sleep clothes.
Gonna use her sun summoner powers when getting up in the middle of the night to fetch water etc., only to curse profusely because ✨light sensitivity✨
Midnight snacks. No elaboration is needed.
Definitely owns a stag plushie. Cause poor thing.
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Mal Oretsev
Sleeps like he's in a coffin
No honestly. Like, on his back, straight as a plank. Psychopath.
The nightmares tho.
The biggest duvet stealer
Never actually uses the duvet tho. Kicks it away every time
Can barely be bothered to change
Absolutely cannot be bothered to make the bed
Hasn't got a single idea how to put on a bedsheet
Red flag: eats in bed too often
Occasionally has a dream about Nikolai throwing him overboard Volkvolny and grinning down at him, saints know why.
Would fall asleep under any circumstance. Light, loud sounds, anything. Bang two pans repeatedly next to his head, and the guy will still fall asleep if he's sure he can afford to.
Has a phoenix plushie. Pun intended.
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Aleksander Morozova
does this guy even sleep? Questionable.
But in case he does:
A side sleeper
Surprisingly heavy sleeper
Rarely sleeps in bed when unsupervised tho. Not uncommon for him to fall asleep in a chair.
Black silk sheets only.
Talks in his sleep
Seriously.
If someone walked in on him sleeping, he'd be long since executed for treason.
Absolutely unaffected by caffeine
Produces a whole lotta shadows before going to sleep, roused by the slightest amount of light.
The extensive night routine is canon.
Doesn't have a plushie. The only one in this hc series btw.
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Nikolai Lantsov
my favorite sailor bo- anyway
(Let's ignore Volkralai for the purpose of these hc's)
A stomach sleeper. We stan.
A pillow hugger. We stan.
Mostly blue bedding, especially in the palace or the spinning wheel, since we all know he misses the sea.
Another one with a whole-ass night routine.
Reduced amount of clothes when sleeping- usually just pants
They're pajama pants tho
Has some trouble falling asleep on land, he's used to the rocking of the ship
nap king, especially as Sturmhond
Reads a LOT before bed
A night owl- has to be reminded to got to sleep
Sometimes starts to rant about some invention of his
C A N N O T fall asleep without cuddles. Like, he's physically unable
The biggest manchild about waking up early.
Has a fox plushie. A fact.
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Genya Safin
babygirl has nightmares, okay? Gotta start with that.
lowkey got accustomed to some level of luxury in Os Alta
not the biggest fan of cuddling. For understandable reasons
a warm beverage before bed
fuzzy socks
tries to maintain an exact time to go to sleep but ultimately fails because she's got trouble falling asleep
probably improves on her sleeping habits once she becomes a part of the triumvirateonly cause she has to tho
overthinking before sleep queen
does she have a plushie? Does David count? You tell me.
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alinacecee · 9 months ago
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Player 55
Carlos Sainz Jr x reader.
TW: Smut (yet again), brain-rot (again💀), just my hormones talking tbh, maybeeeee bad smut writing, lowkey hate the format too so I guess I can add that, maybeee typing errors and grammar too
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Imagine, reader wanting to fuck Carlos as he wears this jersey.
Ferrari had yet again pulled your boyfriend away from you. It was supposed to be a rest week- away from racing, away from media, away from strategies, away from all of it. But of course, they had to call Carlos in to showcase and model some new merch for the upcoming Grand Prix.
Carlos had given you a cursory goodbye with a quick peck on the lips before he dashed off to the factory. It was a good thing he’d been living in the same city in accordance with his contract.
A few hours went by and just like that, it was nightfall. It was nightfall and you had grown increasingly needy for your boyfriend. It was supposed to be date night. You both had planned to cook pasta and binge-watch a new series you had begged him to watch with you.
By now, it was almost half-past midnight. You were sat on the sofa facing the door; arms crossed on your chest, brows scrunched together in a frown, and a deathly gaze towards the door waiting for your boyfriend who had texted over 15 times that he was ‘almost done’ throughout the day.
After 5 more minutes, you hear keys fumbling on the other side of the door and then a breathless Carlos, practically bursting through it.
A breathless, messy-haired, red-in-the-face Carlos with his white pants and what seemed like the new merch that Ferrari had asked him to come in for.
All your anger seemed to have drained away as you saw how the material had laid on your boyfriend’s body. How good it fit him, how it defined his shoulders even more, and how relaxed and lazy it looked on him.
He had been babbling on and on about how sorry he is and how busy it suddenly got but you were busy drooling at how good he looked in the jersey.
You shifted a few times, realizing how wet you got from oggling at your boyfriend before standing up and wordlessly dragging him to your shared bedroom.
———————————————————————————
You wasted no time into riding his face, gripping at the jersey for support as you reached your second orgasm from his nose hitting your clot and his tongue inside your dripping pussy.
Not long after, you were riding his cock- still fucked out from his tongue and gripping needily on the piece of cloth that was hanging on to him.
It didn’t take long for Carlos to decide that the jersey was bothering him though. He was just about to take it off when you gripped it harder, muttering as much as you can in your fucked-out state for him to keep it on.
That’s where things took a turn. His face has that shit-eating grin as his pupils- in some other worldly way- had dilated more than you thought they could.
You had been flipped over, him fucking into you from behind like there’s no tomorrow as he’s forcing you to look at yourself in your closet mirror, all fucked-out…in his jersey. The exact same jersey that led you to be in this situation.
“Ay Amor, look how pretty you are- all fucked out, in my jersey, wearing my number. Basically screaming to the world that I own you.”
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yang4ever · 4 months ago
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do u believe in luv and basketball? ⋆🏀₊˚⊹ ♡ 🎧
liu yangyang of wayv (eek yay) x fem!reader
💌 part of the soft !hobbies with wayv! series im currently writing.. just mini stories abt wayv and their favorite things + their fav girl (you, duh). more soon~!
w.c. 882! so.. about 5-7 minutes of ur time hehe
content - fluff + hurt-comfort, long-distance bf!yangyang, reader is referred to as "girlfriend" "pretty girl" & "princess", mild cursing, winwin = sicheng, yangyang lives in germany for this one lol, (for like one sec) BASKETBALL BF YANGYANG:3
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get a girlfriend, they said. it'll be fun, they said.
and it is... most of the time.
but right now, yangyang thinks it's the least fun it has ever been… owing to your current study abroad.
you didn’t want to take it, not really– what would happen to you and him? but he insisted because god, if it wasn’t a good ass opportunity for you and your dream job.
so, you sniffled your way through the security line at the airport, and yangyang always wakes up wishing it was already the next day, just so he’d be one day closer to your homecoming.
and at this very moment?
he’s here on the phone with you, recalling his afternoon spent with sicheng. hoping that maybe this time you wouldn’t fall asleep because of the time difference.
“hm. he sounds really bad, babe.” you say sleepily into the phone and yangyang feels that familiar ache in his chest he’s learned comes with missing you.
“he was! he really was!” the male responds, letting out a soft sigh.
he shifts around his bed, finding comfort as he settles into the space where you would usually be. the darkness of his bedroom feels like it's enveloping him in more ways than one tonight. “i was actually cooking him...”
yangyang pauses when he hears you yawn on the other line and then the rustling of what must be you snuggling more deeply into your blanket.
it’s barely 7pm in germany but it’s already a little past midnight at your over 5,000 mile away dorm. he knows you must be struggling to stay awake and in his most logical mind, he should be letting his pretty girl go to sleep. 
but when you mumble, “why’d you stop, baby? keep going..” he can’t help but give into his want to keep talking to you.
“i took this kind of long shot, y/n... it’s called a 2-pointer.. i swear, if you had seen it, you would’ve been like, ‘what the hell?’ because it was really that cool…”
“i wish i could’ve seen it too, yangie.” your voice carries a hint of wistfulness even through the phone and yangyang’s stomach twists at the thought of you missing him too.
“me too... it’s a lot more fun for me when you’re watching me play. you know that, right, princess?”
“really?” you sound so sweetly hopeful and yangyang’s smile is almost audible as he replies, his tone warm and affectionate. “yeah, dummy. you make everything more fun.”
“and?” you say suspiciously and he laughs a little. “i mean… i get my own personal cheerleader…”
you groan despite your boyfriend now laughing for real at his own lame joke. he's cute and it makes it hard for you to keep a straight face, but alas, you persist.
“you have such an ego on you, liu yangyang,” you roll your eyes, forgetting he can’t see you do it. “and you're corny too. it is so over for you when sicheng gets good at basketball… or gets a girlfriend…”
“oh shit!” yangyang’s laughter fades into a sudden excitement that rings out over your speakerphone. “i forgot to tell you… unless… you’re already halfway asleep..?” his voice takes on a slightly mischievous tone, tugging you out of your drowsy haze.
“ugh, you’re dumbbbbb,” you whine, playfully dragging out the syllable in feigned annoyance.
but safe to say, your curiosity is piqued despite the heaviness of your eyelids. 
“what is it?" you ask.
"wait. tell me you love me first," yangyang demands earnestly and you gawk at the unexpected request through the line.
"oh, you're crazy."
"what? i can't ask my girlfriend to tell me that she loves me?" your boyfriend teases, and for once, you're glad for the distance between you two, knowing he would've been all over the blush quickly creeping up your neck and cheeks.
"i just don't wanna blow up your already huge ego," you defend and he snickers.
"how about you tell me first," you hum quietly, fiddling with the edge of your blanket.
you wonder if he can detect the hopefulness in your voice-- you'd never admit it but you actually really do want to hear those words from him right now, the thought making you feel all glowy inside and suddenly shy at the prospect of turning his request back on him.
"yeah, okay." yangyang agrees easily. "i love you."
at those three words, you can't help the smile that blooms across your features or the way your tummy starts swarming with butterflies. is it a confession you've heard many times over? yes. does the amount of times you hear it do anything to calm the way your heart beats quaint with longing? no, never.
"make sure you're not meeting any hot singles who can cook, ok? i want you to come home to me," yangyang continues his sentiments to you. he keeps his tone light but you think the subtle crack at the end of his sentence gives him away. "i miss you a lot."
"i won't! i love you, too. so much." you admit in a rush, hoping your boyfriend can't sense the dull ache tinged in your words.
for a moment, you almost say that without him, you wouldn't really have a home to return to.
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a.n. - wow first tumblr post!!! i've been on the platform, reading fanfiction since january of 23'. i wrote this work in one sitting last month and ive been re-editing it slowly ever since then. it's not my favorite thing in the world if im being honest but i just want to put myself out here lol. i love thinking up random stories in my head.. and now my stories are urs too!! send me stuff if u wanttt i stan a lot of groups i think
(˶˃ ᵕ ˂˶) .ᐟ.ᐟ THANK YOU for reading my words hahahahaha also bruh basketball is barely mentioned in here wtf .
+ the lowercase used throughout the story is a stylistic choice because i find it pretty. the highlighted sentences too:)!
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xerosah · 1 year ago
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I mean this isn’t even normal anymore. How can a man look like THIS!? 😩
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wh0refornikolailantsov · 2 years ago
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Compass Of Pirates - Nikolai Lantsov
Summary: Nikolai is given a compass that he was told would solve all his problems, and yet he cannot figure out why it doesn't seem to work. Yes, I am merging with Pirates Of The Caribbean because I fucking can.
Content Warnings: No Beta/Proof Reading.
Nikolai Taglist: @hauntedenthusiasttragedy
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The brass points across the centre of the compass are centred by a sundial, which as far as Sturmhond can tell is the most functional part of the compass. He holds the compass in the clutch of his palm, staring at the red arrow as it gently swings between two points, neither of which are north. He had picked it up from someone in one of the markets in the last port they docked in. It was this rocky, mountainous island, just off the northern coast of the mainland. The name of the port escapes the captains mind, but it was some fishing port with a name not unlike a weapon of some kind. But that isn't really important, what is important is the illusion of help this compass had been acquired under. "It will bring you to what you most desire," they had said, "the compass never leads you wrong." He had been dubious but nevertheless he has hope he isn't sure he has a right to, and yet he was finding the outcome very disappointing.
"This thing doesn't even point north," Sturmhond says, staring again at the compass in his hand. Mal shrugs, offering out his open hand.
"May I?" he asks. He hands it over, without pause and the dial spins to quickly into a new direction the moment it touches Mal's palm. Mal watches the dial and follows it's direction. He knows exactly what the privateer has observed, that this compass does not point north, but instead it is now pointing at Alina, who is leaning over the edge of the ship, staring at the way the waves are breaking onto the boats side, creating the white foam of sea spray and she is smiling like she has never seen the ocean before. "Oh, Sturmhond," Mal says, "it points north alright," he chuckles, "true north."
The Captain frowns. "True north?" he questions, staring the tracker down. "What kind of navigational system are you working on Oretsev?"
"The only one that hasn't ever lead me wrong," he hands the compass back to Sturmhond and the moment it enters his hand it changes direction back to where it had been previously pointing. Mal taps the fabric of his shirt, directly over his heart. "I told Alina about true north once, she asked me what scared me most, and I told her I get the most scared when I am lost, but I don't really get lost. Yet, getting lost happens even if you know where you are sometimes. So I told her about cardinal north and true north."
"Cardinal north is a direction on a map," Sturmhond says. Mal nods, not letting his eyes leave the Sun Summoner. "So, as for true north?"
"True north is home," Mal says, sounding more like a poet than a tracker, "it is where you feel safe and loved."
"Miss Starkov is your truth north," Sturmhond says with a nod. Mal doesn't even need to respond to that. "So you think this compass points to what exactly?"
"Whatever you most desire, that's what the translation says on the side isn't it?" Mal says, finally looking at him. "You did see that, didn't you? Since you're always six steps ahead of everything, and ever so flawless Captain?"
He is too eager to test the theory to even care about Mal's teasing of him. He just thanks him absentmindedly and follows the compass forward. "Don't walk off the edge of the ship," Mal calls after him, "or do..."
He spends a good while walking the length of the decking, trying to figure out why the dial spins into a change of direction, seemingly without link. "Maybe you don't know what you want," Mal teases, observing him.
"Doesn't this interest you?" Sturmhond asks, running a hand through his tousled hair.
Mal shrugs. "What use is a compass what would be pointing right beside me all of the time?" he asks. "Besides my heart always brings me back to her."
"You're good with your words when it suits you, aren't you?" Tamar asks, coming to stand beside Mal, bored of her card game and far more interested in whatever it is that has gotten the Captain all pacing and flustered. "Still staring at the broken compass?"
"It's not broken," Mal says, "it's just not helpful."
"A compass's only purpose is to point north, and it doesn't, so it's broken," Tamar argues.
"It's a heart compass, not a compass," Mal says. The Heartrender laughs.
"Those are legend," she says, taking some walnuts from her pocket to snack on. She offers him one and he shakes his head to dismiss the offer.
"Wasn't the Stag legend too?" Mal retorts. Tamar gives him a shrug.
"That means nothing of all legend," is her response, but she keeps watching Sturmhond.
"It doesn't even make sense," he says finally holding the compass up and above his head to see how the dial moves. "It's not pointing to anything, I thought it might've been pointing to Ravka but I was wrong."
"You're suggesting your truest love is a country?" Mal asks, "what kind of excessive patriotism is that?"
"You're not patriotic?" Tamar asks, her tone littered with laughter.
"No," he admits, not feeling pulled down by the admission, "I came here for Alina. She's my flag, my nation, she is the one thing I remain loyal to."
Tamar's question was to sway Mal from paying too much attention to the captains words, but he doesn't throw her a look of gratitude, instead he returns to his fixation on the compass, as it spins to point towards the ships bow. Some of the crew start to appear on deck, changing placement as the time passes, and Tolya walks beside you, as you tell him something out of their earshot.
He takes his eyes off the compass, staring directly at you, forgetting what his original intentions had been, he offers you a smile and you grin back, all teeth and cheer. Even after the days at sea nothing seemed to sway your mood.
Tamar elbows Mal in the side and before her can take issue with it, she nods his attention to Sturmhond, who has lost interest in the compass altogether in your presence.
"Got it working yet?" you ask, coming closer to the three of them Tolya by your side.
"Think it might be a lost cause," the privateer admits, holding the compass down and to his side, as if to hide it's direction from those around you.
"Come on, Captain, plenty have said that about broken things, but often you just need time or the right pair of hands," you say, "show me?"
He hesitates and Mal and Tamar share a look, a look that spreads into matching grins. "Oh, he is not as smart as he gives himself credit for," Mal says in hushed words.
"Most of the time he is, but any heart can get blind sighted, and when the heart is blind, the mind can fog," Tamar says, voice equally low.
You look at him and he is smiling at you like you're a sunrise, like he is seeing you for the first time, and you wonder how he always manages to look at you like this. Look at you in a way that makes your head spin and your stomach twist. You know Sturmhond, and you know the man can flirt like second nature, that no one you've yet to meet have been susceptible to his charms, so you try not to let go to your head. But that's not easy when he looks at you like he has just discovered what love is for the very first time.
He holds out the compass out and you look at it, not reaching to take it from his hands, you move around to his perspective for the dial to swing back in your direction. You lean around him, to get a better look and then stare out at the ocean. But he just watches you, not as much are daring to confirm what he suspects by glancing to the compass.
You move back in front of him, and the dial points to you, and you turn your head to look at the big blue expanse behind. "Compass doesn't know north that's for sure," you say, giving him a wild smile and a shrug. "But I guess it's no better than most of us in that."
"It doesn't know north," he agrees, shoving the compass back in his pocket, "but it seems to know things I should have before now."
"Hmm?" you ask, turning back to him from the waves.
"Nothing, now, tell me, what was so funny?"
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littlest-w01f · 3 months ago
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MAIN MASTERLIST
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Hello, people of Tumblr, welcome to my home, please be nice during your visit. Constructive criticism is welcome, and so is cash/credit <3 Thank you for spending your time on my page :) Feel free to request moodboards of your favs, not really ready to accept fics requests right now
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ACOTAR MASTERLIST
main series links
Flames and Darkness - OC x Eris Vanserra
Blooming Flowers - OC x Rhysand
Meeting in Grey - OC x Nyx
THE EMPYREAN MASTERLIST (coming soon)
Main series links
Shining Light - OC x Xaden Riorson
GRISHAVERSE MASTERLIST (coming soon)
Main series links
Xinqic - OC x Nikolai Lantsov
Wicked Dark - OC x Kaz Brekker
MY LADY JANE MASTERLIST (coming soon)
Main series links
N/A
LOVE AND DEEPSPACE MASTERLIST
Main series links
N/A
MISCELLANEOUS
Kinktober 2024
Moodboards
Drabbles/Headcanons
Birthday Celebration
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frost-queen · 2 years ago
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That’s the deal (Grisha!Reader x Kaz Brekker)
Requested by: anon, Forever tag: @missmelodramatic​, @theletterhart​, @alex--awesome--22​, @elllie-does-the-posts​, @floatlosers​, @merlieve​, @queen-of-books​, @glimmering-darling-dolly​, @denkisclown​, @wildieflower​, @meyocoko​, @bubblybrianna​, @justanothercoco​ @idkwhatmyusernameis,  @subjecta13-thefangirl, @m-rae23​, @harleyquinnswifeyfrfr​, @swampthing07​​ 
Summary in short: The crows find themselves at the little palace in search for the Sun summoner. Instead Kaz stumbles upon someone else very alluring. Having been discovered, Kaz makes an escape through the crowd, blending in with a very confused yet complying Grisha. Unable to stop thinking about him, you sneak out of the little palace in the hopes of meeting your teasingly criminal once more. Moved to Ketterdam you are kept out of sight in fear of any soldiers coming for you. Left alone with Kaz tensions rise till it makes him take actions for his meddling feelings. 
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“In and out as quick as we can.” – Kaz told Inej and Jesper. – “No detours and no distractions.” – he made clear seeing Jesper eye a passing Grisha guard. – “Wha?” – Jesper answered baffled as if everything was always his fault. – “We need to stay focused.” – Kaz reminded them clearly. – “Find the sun summoner and leave.” – Inej whispered sticking close to the walls. – “Exactly.” – Kaz responded lowly. His gaze gliding from wall to wall. Taking in every little detail of the little palace. 
They came to a stop. Jesper fidgeting at the guard’s uniform he was wearing. Kaz snapped his finger in front of him to make him stop. – “It itches.” – Jesper whined out annoyingly. – “There will be a lot more itching if you don’t act your part!” – Kaz made clear with a cold glare. Jesper huffed loud moving his hands up in defense. – “Alright easy with the threats.” – Jesper mumbled. Kaz went his way as three was a crowd and a crowd drew too much attention. 
Jesper continued to rub the fabric harshly against his collarbone. – “It itches am I right?” – he asked Inej, sighing loud as she had disappeared. Shaking his hands humorously he was once again speaking to the walls. Each crow having gone a different way in search of the sun summoner. That was the job. Get in, secure the sun summoner, and get out. The reward one million kruge. A fine prize to simply kidnap one person.
You exhaled deep, gaze lowered to the ground. All around you Grisha whispering and chatting in the wait of the sun summoner. Across the room you spotted General Kirigan. His gaze met up with yours, giving you a firm nod. You lowered your gaze going a bit through your knees as a respective response. There were people standing with you, but they weren’t really speaking with you. You simply co-existed in the room with everyone else. Yes, the sun summoner Alina Starkov was a very interesting person. 
Just all the attention and balls were a bit too much. All in favor of her. You noticed some people getting on the tips of their toes or looking anticipating at the door. You looked as well. The doors opening to reveal Miss Alina Starkov in black Grisha wear. No one ever wore black but General Kirigan, so it was quite the spectacle. Her eyes fell immediately upon him as she entered. People clearing the way for her to reach General Kirigan. He held his hand out for her as she happily accepted it. A fluster on her cheeks. 
General Kirigan whispered something to her, seeing her giggle giddy. – “A demonstration?” – he declared showcasing her. Everyone clapped. General Kirigan brought Alina to where you were. He let go of her hand as she got on a higher platform. You stood underneath her watching General Kirigan return to his place. There he opened his hands the room slowly darkening. 
You spotted two new guards enter the room. Two you had never seen before. They looked wonderous around as the room darkened. A shadow creeping down from the ceiling to the floor, covering the room in eternal darkness. Pitch black with nothing to see or make out. No shapes, no silhouettes, just complete darkness. Still enough to hear your own heart beat out loud.
Then near you emerged a little light in the palms of her hand. Gently growing larger as it casted an illuminating light in the room. All eyes on the sun summoner in awe. Yet two pair of eyes were not focused on her. One of the newly entered guards was looking somewhere lower then the sun summoner. Catching his gaze it was clear he was staring at you in the alluring light. The gaze grasping you by the throat. Heart thumping louder against your ribcage. 
The sun summoner seemingly of no interest to him. Yet a simple Grisha was. Alina casted all General Kirigan’s shadows out. The room taking on the normal light once more. Loud clapping filled the room. General Kirigan staring deeply affected at the sun summoner. She returned to him, making her way across. Kaz and Inej shared a look. Inej in wonder, Kaz not so sure. They rejoined in the room, standing close to each other. – “She is real… Saints she is.” – Inej said to him. Kaz observed the room, eyes lingering on a particular Grisha girl. – “Hey!” – they suddenly heard from behind them. 
Turning around a Grisha appeared with six guards behind him. He pointed firmly at them. Kaz and Inej simply had to nod to each other, knowing they have been discovered. Inej disappeared easily as Kaz pressed through, further through the crowd. He dismissed of the silly hat as the crowd swallowed him whole. Seeing the guards were in pursuit. A dance filled half the room. Grisha dancing alluringly. General Kirigan and Alina Starkov amidst them.
You rose from your bow, moving your hands gracefully sideways. Then to the other side, spinning around. Taking a firm step forwards you met up with your partner. Hand brought upwards along with his. Dancing in tight paces. No smooth movements from the next step to the other. Rather tight and firm step by step aside from each other. You lowered your hand, turning your shoulder forwards, brushing past your partner. Back to back. You moved to face your partner once more as he took your hand, rising it up. 
You stepped underneath his arm letting go of his hand. As you turned back, eyes widened at your sudden new partner. It was clear you were confused as the guard from earlier was by you now. – “Don’t utter a word.” – he said lowly taking a step forwards. You nodded moving your hand up. He did as well, hands barely touching as you slowly turned around. Both turned away from each other to rejoin seconds later. You shot your arm up, arched to the side. 
The guard copied you, holding his other hand behind his back as did you. He lead you, taking firm, large paces. You had to follow taking large steps backwards as people needed to clear way for you. You spotted the guards looking around. Grabbing people by the shoulder to look at their faces. Suddenly it became clear to you. – “You are no guard?” – you said waltzing to the side. Hands nearly touching, but never in contact. – “What gave me away?” – he curled up a smirk.
He noticed others twirling their dance partner around. He took a hold of your Grisha uniform, giving you a good spin. Grabbing the fabric by your hip, he put a stop to your spinning. – “The guards behind you.” – you answered with a cheeky smile. Kaz looked over his shoulder coming in immediate action. He putted some fabric near your wrist between his fingers, holding your arm arched up. He started moving back with you, cutting through the dance room. – “Are you a criminal?” – you asked out of breath. He smiled cunningly as your arm dropped to the side. – “Would you like me to be?” – he responded teasingly. 
To not stand out, he needed to copy the dance movements of the others. They took the hand of their partner, stepping forwards. Then backwards as their joined hand rose and fell. Kaz held your sleeve’s end between his fingers copying their routine. – “You have a funny way of touching your partner.” – you said chuckling. Kaz stared in your eyes, breath caught. – “Perhaps I am gentle around a rare flower.” – he answered flirty. – “Or you are simply scared to touch me.” – you pointed out, letting your back brush close to his. 
He caught your sleeve once more, pulling you to a stop. You rejoined him, moving your hand down near his cheek. You gasped when his palm pressed deeply onto your lower back. – “Who is afraid to touch who now?” – he smiled at you flustered cheeks. You spotted the guards drawing nearer. Taking his hand you twirled underneath it. Moving further down the room with each spin, Kaz needing to follow you hastily. People who weren’t dancing made way. You neared the walls grabbing him by the shoulders as you spun him around. His back to the wall.
You stepped close to him, moving your arms around his body. Fidgeting behind him to find the doorknob blindly. Kaz swallowed nervously taking in your perfume as your lips neared his face. You smiled hearing a loud click. Kaz smirked having heard the sound as well. – “Run.” – you whispered to him, his eyes almost rolling back with pleasure of hearing your voice so close to him. He pushed the door open with his back, bringing his finger to his lips to hush you. You did the same with a flirty smile, watching your stranger disappear in the hallway. – “Y/n!” – you heard, turning around sharply. 
“Have you seen someone dressed as a guard, has a bit of a limp?” – he asked. You shook your head blocking the door with your back. You then gasped pointing in the crowd. – “Is that him?” – you called out. His head turned signaling his fellow men to follow him. Letting your back fall against the door, you swooned thinking back about him. How he only had eyes for you at the demonstration. How he suddenly got rid of your partner to dance with you. Clearly as a distraction to escape, but still you were pleased he chose you out of all girls. There was something so alluring about him that drove you wild.
“Where is the sun summoner?” – Jesper asked when Kaz joined him by the carriages. Kaz shot him a glare. Inej dropped down beside Kaz silently. – “Where the hell have you been?” – Jesper called out, looking at her. Inej frowned. – “Finding the sun summoner. What have you been up to?” – Inej asked approaching him. Jesper ducked when Inej plucked some hay from his jacket, showing it to him. – “Uhm… I don’t know how that got there.” – Jesper spoke as Kaz rolled his eyes. 
“Right?” – Inej answered throwing the hay at him. Inej then looked at Kaz who was looking back at the little palace. – “What caught you off guard?” – she asked. He hummed loud, having heard her half. – “I thought for sure you’d have the sun summoner.” – she pointed out. He looked away, not wanting her to see anything in his expression. – “Yeah Kaz, I thought at least you would make this plan work. Easy in and out, right?” – Jesper pointed out teasingly. 
Kaz glaring hard at him, withholding himself to smack Jes on the back of his head. – “There will never be another opportunity.” – Inej said. – “And perhaps that is the way it is supposed to be.” – making Kaz and Jesper frown at her. – “You had to see her Jesper. A saint.” – Kaz sighed loud at her saints. – “Uhm guys…” – Jesper said eyes slowly widening. Inej kept speaking of her saints, bickering with Kaz about faith. – “Guys!” – Jesper hissed, ducking down. – “What?” – Kaz called out annoyed, leaning firm against his cane.
Jesper pointing eagerly behind him while trying to hide. Inej and Kaz slowly turning around, eyes widening at a Grisha looking searchingly around. Kaz recognized you immediately. Inej took out her knifes as Kaz moved his hand out to her to stop her. – “She’s alone.” – he said, brows slightly furrowed. – “Good. Easy for me to take out.” – Jesper answered pulling out his gun. – “No!” – Kaz made clear, glaring at Jesper over his shoulder. – “Get in the carriage!” – he ordered. 
“What?” – Jesper answered confusingly, scratching the back of his head with his gun. – “Do as I say!” – he made clear. Inej tugged at Jesper’s arm, pulling him with her. They got in the carriage as you spotted him. You weren’t sure if you could approach him, but the flutter your heart made at the sight of him was undeniable. When you saw him make his way over, you jogged over, meeting him sooner. – “What are you doing here?” – he asked. – “Would you call me a fool if I said I was looking for you?” – you replied nervously. 
Kaz looking briefly away. – “I’m glad to see you are unbound.” – you teased, pointing at his hands. Kaz smiled. – “They would have to do a lot more then send guards after me to catch me.” – he chuckled. You caught Kaz staring drawing you in. Breaking contact, you looked over your shoulder up to the little palace. Thinking about how unhappy and alone you felt lately. It was all for themselves. Only yourself to count on. Kaz must have noticed your hesitance and inner torment as he spoke. – “I am in need of a Grisha.”
You looked back at him, eyes slightly widening. – “I’ll be your Grisha.” – you responded. – “All I ask of you is to take me away from this place.” – Kaz nodded at your request. – “That is the deal.” – he mumbled stepping aside. You approached the carriage without hesitation. Kaz’s gaze lingering on the little palace. Overlooking if no one was coming after you. You opened the carriage door, greeted by two surprised faces. 
Before you could say anything, you were pushed in the carriage by a cane against your back. You stumbled inside, settling down beside the girl. Both of them unable to stop staring at you. Kaz joined coming to sit beside Jesper as the carriage got in motion. – “Who is she?” – Jesper asked curiously as the girl was observing you closely. Kaz’s gaze going towards you. – “An investment.” – he answered. – “Y/n.” – you responded sweetly with a smile. You had a name so it was important to you to share it.
You were pushed into an office with a list of clear instructions. You are not to leave this room. You are certainly not allowed to leave the crows club. Most importantly you stay out of sight. Almost an entire week have you been hidden in this room. After a while you guessed it was to keep you out of sight from any soldiers looking for you. There was after all a Grisha missing from the little palace. You jumped up hearing the door open. It was Inej who entered with food. You gestured for her to place it on the desk. 
You saw she had a burning question on her lips as she lingered in the door opening. – “Yes Inej.” – you said inviting her to speak her words. It caught her slightly off guard. – “I…I was wondering why… why did Kaz bring you along from the little palace.” – she asked. – “A deal… we made a deal.” – you responded looking out of the window. – “What… what kind of deal?” – Inej asked further. – “That is between Y/n and me!” – Inej jumped out of her skin at the voice of Kaz behind her. 
She moved aside for him to enter. Firm expression on his face. His eyes meeting briefly up with yours. Inej apologized taking her leave after a glare from Kaz. The door shut as Kaz, and you were left alone. He removed his coat, hanging it up. You stepped away from the window, going around the desk. – “You could’ve told her.” – you said tracing your finger around the shape of your plate. – “That you are simply in need of a Grisha and that I wanted a way out of the little palace.”
Kaz moved away from you, keeping his distance. He stood between two archways, one hand pressed against a side. His gaze was on you, lips pressing together as his head lowered pained with emotions. – “That would’ve been a lie.” – he answered. You frowned. – “Was that not our deal?” – you questioned. He nodded, keeping his gaze down. He couldn’t lie to himself that it was only a detour to actually have you near. How foolish it was of him to feel so drawn to a person at first sight. 
“But there is more?” – you spoke taking it out of his expression. Kaz swallowed. Your head lifted up hearing some carriages and loud voices. You rushed to the window to look down. Suddenly feeling a presence behind you. Kaz looking over your shoulder down as well. It made you unable to focus on the streets with him so close to you. How on your knees you were for this man, and he couldn’t even see it. Relieved you exhaled as it weren’t soldiers. Simply some drunk folk and a carriage from the menagerie passing by. 
“Do you think they are searching for me?” – you asked. – “They won’t find you.” – Kaz responded as you slowly turned. Swallowing at how close his body was nearly pressed against yours. – “I won’t let them.” – he spoke lowering his gaze on you. Breathing increasing at the way his eyes stared right at you. His gaze drifting down to your lips making him part his yearnful. He had always been repulsed by human touch, so why was his heart now craving for a touch of yours.
Kaz pressed his hand against the window by your head, leaning in closer. – “They’ll have to tear this place down brick by brick to find you.” – he said tilting his head a bit to the side. – “I am but an investment.” – you answered caught so deeply in his grasp. Kaz tensed his jaw, pressing your head back by his hand around your neck, thumb against your jaw. – “Don’t spread false words Y/n.” – replied. – “Kaz.” – you whispered before his eyes closed, lips settling down on yours. At the first touch he pulled away to reflect how his lips withstood your touch. Settled he kissed you again, taking every opportunity to explore your lips with his.
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Read more of my fics on my Masterlists!    
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aleksanderscult · 2 months ago
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I don’t know if you’ve posted about it before, but do you know of any good Darklina fics? Especially ones that characterize the Darkling in some realm of canon, without making him uncharacteristically evil. Thank you :)
I have read so few unfortunately.
The only ones I've read are:
Start a War
The Timeless series
A Curse Between Us
I've also heard good reviews about the "Unmaking the Heart of the World".
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yawnderu · 7 months ago
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Neet Simon who caresses our skin to take notes about our softness for his art?🫠🫠
Neet!Simon is as pathetic as a man can get. :(
Too big and brooding, yet too much of a loser to even try to get fanny. Luckily for him, his best friend is fully willing to serve as a live muse for his art, fully bare in his bed, his calloused hands running through every single inch of skin they can reach, dilated pupils admiring the mix of fat and muscle seeping through his fingers. 
Of course, it’s all in the name of art— that’s what he tells you, that’s what he tells himself, too. Anything to avoid admitting how much of a gross bastard he is, his pants tented as he kisses and caresses your body like you’re a religious figure worthy of worship, his gray sweatpants tented, pre-cum already forming a stain that he doesn’t even bother hiding, completely shameless even in your presence.
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nichyevosobachka · 1 month ago
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Nikolai chuckled. "I'm sure the Darkling would be thrilled to know that you think of him in an obsidian tower dressed in a black ballgown growing a beard long enough for someone to climb up and save him. Maybe I'll tell him so next time he's being particularly trying." Alina laughed so hard she snorted. "Only if you let me watch."
Alliance of Enemies by @storm-elf Please every time i read this part I have to laugh.
(I'm definitely not on my fourth re-read of the fic...couldn't be me)
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keira63fic · 2 months ago
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(un)lucky (1/1)
Against her wishes, Alina’s husband Mal seeks a luck potion from Aleksander Morozov. When he flees without making payment, Alina is left alone to worry about the consequences.
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myeur-n · 1 year ago
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Imagine that Sturmhond reveals himself as Prince Nikolai Lantsov, but you couldn't accept it
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Disclaimer:
This oneshot is purely based on the Netflix series, so some of the lore might be incorrect
y/n is a female Grisha
Angst/Fluff
"Captain, are you sure that the Saint is stable enough to cross the fold?" y/n approached the captain's table and crossed her arms before him. The Volkvolny was beginning to rumble from the calling of the Fold, and as a Materialki, you weren't really fond of how the wooden planks of the ship you had invented with your Captain begun to stir.
"Y/n, how many times have I asked you to address me by Sturmhond?" The blonde and blue-eyed privateer snickered at you, leaning back against his cushioned chair and crossing his legs. You remained silent and only had a concerned look crossing your features. "Come on, then. Call me by my name then I shall answer you," he added and began beckoning you toward him.
"Alright... Sturmhond. Now answer me," you rolled your eyes. "You know how terrified I am of the Fold. If I get caught by one of the Volcra in there, I'll be demanding that you pay for my health insurance even if I'm dead,".
"I would expect no less from you," he pulled a soft smile at your direction, which almost warmed your heart - almost. You shook your head as he stood up from his chair and stood next to you.
"It'll be alright, y/n. Alina's strong enough with her amplifier. You'll be safe, I can promise you that," he muttered, casting a soft smile at you before he climbed the stairs to the upper deck.
"No doubt he's about to show off the Hummingbird," you rolled your eyes and tailed him.
Before you knew it, you were suddenly up in the air and reaching the entrance of the Fold. You looked up at the abyssal storm, growling and calling before your very eyes. Quickly turning around, you saw that only a few of the Volkvolny crew, including yourself and your captain; the Saint herself and her lover were aboard the Hummingbird.
Alina Starkov looked back at the Fold with a determined glare, while Mal's eyes were clouded with his usual protectiveness. Before you could turn to look at Sturmhond, he had already crossed the ship's deck and stood by your side, linking your arms tightly with his.
"It's going to be alright. You don't have to be scared," he mumbled in a low voice, almost to himself. You could hear the slight tremble in his voice, and you knew you weren't alone in this consuming fear - he felt the same way too.
"Sturmhond," you turned your wrists so your palms could capture his. "I trust you," you nodded once before turning back at the starless sky as darkness consumed your surrounding.
Both of you gasped, but held each other tight. The Fold was pitch black and cold - colder than the sea breeze at night. Your mind suddenly travelled to what you could do as a Grisha. You were just a Materialki - a person who could manipulate earth and steel - but, what use is that when it comes to something as powerful as the darkness?
Suddenly, a blinding white light filled your eyes and it came from the Saint.
Sturmhond's blue eyes filled with marvel and wonder, and your heart ached to see them as you realised that he could never look at you the same way he looked at Alina's beautiful sunlight. You pursed your lips and slowly attempted to loosen your grip of his hand, but it won't move a muscle.
You closed your eyes and hoped that this would end soon.
As no light could pierce your eyelids, you thought that the worst is over, but only found that Alina was gasping for air and could not summon the sunlight anymore. Mal rushed to her side to protect her from the Darkness of the Fold, while Sturmhond quickly removed your hands from his and grabbed his pistol.
You rushed to the front of the Hummingbird and placed your hands on the engine of the ship, forcing the gears to work harder so everyone could get out of the Fold quickly. Some of the crew members screamt as they were grabbed by the Volcra and fell to their death.
You panicked as one of the Volcra almost snatched you into the air, but you had quickly picked up a crowbar and shifted it into a sword before slicing it into half.
"Now, that's my lady!" Sturmhond shouted from across the deck as he continued shooting the beasts. You rolled your eyes and with your last effort, you pushed the engines to their limit before they gave out one last revolution and ceased their turning.
And all of you were so close to getting out of the Fold.
"Brace! Brace for impact!" You shouted loud enough for everyone to hear as you shut your eyes hard and focused your abilities to the front of the ship, bending the round-edged wood to become sharp-edged, so that as they land on the ground, it would pierce the dirt and lessen the damage on the Hummingbird. Sturmhond wasn't going to let it go if she had let his precious invention turn into ruin.
The ship dug into the dirt of East Ravka and slid across the grass. Everyone let out a whelp as their knees collapsed from the impact. You exhaled a large breath and wiped a sweat from your forehead. It was definitely hard to use the small sciences without looking at what you're about to change.
Tamar and Tolya were the first to cheer, while Sturmhond quickly ran over to you.
"Are you alright? You seemed to be doing a lot of work there," he spoke - and for the first time, it seemed like it was out of concern.
"Yeah, and it's all because I had to save your damn ship from falling to pieces," you groaned at him, which only received a long chuckle from him.
Out of the blue, everyone heard the marching of more than a legion of soldiers.
"What's going on?" You muttered to yourself, but your eyes held Sturmhond's.
He avoided them and only shook his head.
"Identify yourself!" The captain of the soldier commanded. The Sun Summoner seemed clearly irritated while Sturmhond grasped her shoulder with his one arm and gave it a gentle squeeze.
"I'll handle this," he said and he began to undress himself off his long, ridiculous privateer coat and he seemed to behaving a conversation with the captain. You parted your lips to ask him "Wouldn't you end up naked?", but you quickly took your words back when your eyes perceived Sturmhond wearing a green uniform gilded in golden embroidery, a uniform almost similar to those Ravkan soldiers, but it carried a higher air of command.
"It can't be," the man named Ravski gasped.
"Yes, it is," Sturmhond responded. You unbuckled your knees to get a better view of what was happening.
"Moi Tsarevich," Ravski began to kneel. "My prince,".
You gasped, while Mal and Alina passed each other confused looks.
"I present Nikolai Lantsov, Major of the 22nd Regiment, Soldier of the King's Army, Grand Duke of Udova, and Second Son to his Most Royal Majesty - King Pyotr the Third - Ruler of the Double Eagle Throne!" The captain announced with a spirited voice, while Sturmhond - now Nikolai pulled a smug look across his face.
You couldn't believe your eyes that the man in which you had spent years with was in fact, the estranged Prince of Ravka himself. Your lips quivered as memories came flooding back to you, but you knew that you couldn't cause a scene.
The prince had already been enjoying himself too much.
~•~
Everyone had reached the Stronghold (or moreso like a base) where Grisha who opposed against the Darkling and survivors of East Ravka remained. You spotted Zoya, someone who had always taught you the meaning of hard life back at the Little Palace - greeting Alina Starkov like old friends.
You clenched your fists and held back your tears. Once again, you were a stranger to everyone around you. The only person that you could become yourself was now gone too.
"One week," you took a deep breath in your personal quarters, which was very much far away from Alina and Nikolai's - given your status as a Materialki Grisha. Even Tolya and Tamar's rooms were closer to the Prince's. "Hold on for one week and we shall see," you swallowed the fear in your throat.
Your y/e/c shifted to your modest bed and you laid yourself there - hoping that your memories won't haunt you at night. Everyone was in a meeting to discuss their next move against the Darkling, but you weren't included - as expected.
That night, you recalled the memories from a time long forgotten of you, your brothers and sisters which were called upon to the Little Palace and serve as the Second Army for the Tsar. You shared their excitement when all of you had found out that you were Grisha. Your twin sisters were prodigal Heartrenders like Tamar and Tolya, while your eldest brother was an Inferni and your younger brother was a Squaller. Everyone was suited for battle and talented - but not you.
You were just a plain Materialki - a Durast who was weak and could not bend swords or bullets quickly enough to save your life. And so, you were never ordered to Battle like your siblings since even the Darkling did not acknowledge your abilities.
One day, the Tsar ordered his princes to enter and cross the Fold for a diplomatic mission on west Ravka. Something happened when they were on their way back, and they had to kill as much Volcra as possible along with only a few of the Second Army Soldiers escorting them - with the Heartrenders being your own two sisters and ome of the squallers your younger brother. Almost none survived, with the exception of his princes, as it seemed.
You and your eldest brother grieved their death, and sent many personal letters to both the Darkling and the King, requesting for the return of the bodies of your fallen siblings. However, both of them rejected your requests, giving an excuse that their main priority was to search for the Second Prince - none other than Nikolai Lantsov, instead of bringing their bodies home.
You and your brother were devastated, and he was suddenly being called upon to fight at the Fjerdan borders. You had tried your best to make an armor for him, in which no bullet should be able to pass through - and it worked - only if it hadn't been for the Fjerdans to cut off his head when your brother was wounded.
Distressed, you crossed the the Fold from East to West Ravka by yourself with an invention you had so carelessly made, as an effort to hopefully let the Saints decide your fate in the abyss. And you could have died, if your wounded self wasn't discovered by Sturmhond.
You woke up silently with your eyes brimming in tears. Your siblings' lack of proper burial, Sturmhond's deceit, and your uselessness as a Durast was all too much for you. The very thought of being under the roof of the man which had both killed and saved your life was something your heart could not handle anymore.
You had to leave.
Its not like anyone would realise nor dread your absence.
Wiping the silent and hot tears pouring out of your eyes, you began to pack some clean clothes into your knapsack, a pair of daggers, a map of Ravka, money, food and water. There wasn't much to pack anyway. You put on a cloak and blew out your candle before you opened your door.
"Captain-!" You exclaimed as the blonde and blue-eyed man which had been by your side for years suddenly showed up in front of you with his hands up, and hand balled into a fist, as if he wanted to knock on your door.
"Y/n, you're awake!" He gasped and pulled a cheesy smile. "I guess you've been around me for too long until you could sense me from far away, then?" He chuckled. Slowly observing his formal attire, it was obvious that he had just finished his meeting.
"You're incredibly loud with everything you do, that's how I know," You pursed your lips and forced a smile.
He nodded and began to peek around your pitch black room, past your shoulders. "Your quarters are very dark now, aren't they?" He commented.
"I was sleeping, Capta-I mean, uhm, moi Tsarevich," and you kept a distance away from him as you recalled that the man before you was ranks higher above yours.
"You were asleep with your travelling cloak?" He raised a playful brow.
"You shouldn't be here. Just go to sleep, my prince. You look tired after the meeting,".
"About that," the prince pushed your arm which was blocking the way into your room and lit a match. He searched for your candle for a second and lit it up. "I wanted to talk to you about what happened... earlier," he muttered and his bright eyes searched your room.
"There's nothing to talk about-,".
"Saints, why did they give you such an empty room? There's barely anything in here!" He jumped and began going through your old cupboard. You sighed and closed your eyes, not knowing how to properly deal with the man.
"My prince, you're no longer Sturmhond. Its improper for you to act in this manner. I beg of you, please remove yourself from my quarters," your heart was beginning to ache, but he was seemingly avoiding your words as he continued rambling around.
"The only thing here as stuffed as the king is your-," and his eyes paused at your knapsack. "Why is it packed, y/n? Where are you going?".
"Its none of your concern, my prince," You could not brave yourself to look into his eyes.
"Saints, just call me Nikolai, y/n,".
"How can I just call you Nikolai Lantsov when you've been my Captain and Sturmhond to me?" You snapped as irritation overwhelmed you.
"You don't understand, Nikolai - you're a prince. I'm just a deserter of the Second Army and we're not equals anymore,".
"Come on, you know that I don't think of you that way-,".
"Either way, you can't stop me from leaving," your voice trembled.
Nikolai suddenly crossed his arms and he passed a stern glare at you, a look you had rarely seen him equip himself with. In that moment, you realised that he truly was a Prince - not just any foolish prince like his brother, but a man of command, a man who you could have followed anywhere, even to the edge of the world - if it hadn't been for yourself.
"You can't leave. I forbid you," he stated with his sudden cold blue eyes fixed upon you.
"You have no right to give orders to me," You took a few steps toward him, almost challenging his command.
"You can't leave," Nikolai breathed, voice softening as he slowly closed the distance between the two of you.
"I have no place here - by your side, as a soldier in this war you've involved yourself with. I'm a lesser Durast compared to the ones you've got here-,".
"No one's ever said that to you," Nikolai's hand reached your arm, almost grasping it to not let you go.
"No one needed to say it. I couldn't save my brother because of it. What makes you think that I could save you when you need my help?" your face went hot as you realised how close the both of you were to each other. That panicked heartbeat of yours thundered against your chest and you were worried if he could hear it.
"We made our ship together, y/n. You helped me with my inventions, made it ours and saved me, countless of times during our raids-," he pulled a bittersweet smile as he recalled his days together with you as a privateer.
"Nikolai," your hand instinctively reached his cheek, and he leaned into your touch - blue eyes glowing with a desperate blaze. "Those days are now over. You're a Ravkan Prince and you must let go of things that do not matter anymore - like me,".
He took in a sharp breath and refused to look into your eyes for the first time.
It was true that you had to leave him because there was no chance that the both of you could live peacefully together, sailing away with hopes of building a family together - free from any danger. That was your dream, and not his. Nikolai had always been ambitious, despite his foolhardy efforts to make him appear the opposite.
When he remained silent, you passed by his shoulder and grabbed your knapsack. You crossed your room and to your door, before hesistating to reach for the doorknob. Turning back to him one last time, you stretched a soft and genuine smile of fond farewell to Nikolai.
"Farewell, moi Sobachka. If the Saints would allow it, we'll meet again," you muttered and closed the door behind you as you left.
Nikolai stared at the still door, breathless and heart aching. His heart was heavy, but he understood why you had to leave. With his final breath within your presence, he breathed:
"I love you,".
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swe3tte4rs · 6 months ago
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Hi besties!! So, I'm with more free time, that means that I will TRY to upload the requests as fast as I can 😭
But, I need to ask this question
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