#alex funky text posts

[part-time-deranged]

[part-time-deranged]

🙏🫦🇸🇪✨👍

another summer of thirsting religiously? BRING IT ON

first 5 faceless emojis are how your summers gonna go

[milflewis]

hey i was wondering if you could do a blog rec list maybe? no pressure though! you just have good taste in drivers and shows and stuff imo and seem to know a lot of cool people here!

ah ofc! not really sure how to do these tho so sorry if it’s shit lol or if i forget anyone!

writer blogs

@hungerpunch valewis. dantteri. valtteri blog. lo’s writing has literally made me sit and stare at a wall before. @husbono sewis. smick. posts seb, lewis, mick, alex etc. i live for whatever genius edit idea natasha will bless us with next. @vettelsbitch maxiel. sewis. seb blog. every other month c comes into the gc like. guys. i had this idea for a fic and now i’ve slipped and accidentally written 10k. pls help. and it’s always the best thing ever. @rosyjuly smick. sewis. posts seb, lewis and mick. whenever i see that rosy has answered some fic prompt or smth and there’s a little readmore under the cut! pure delight i’m telling you. @thelittlebirdthatkeptsomanywarm sewis and slagclaren (will forever be grateful to a for writing a fic based on one of The lewis/jenson commercials). @traincoded also has written a slagclaren fic that filled the void of Another batshit insane commercial. @lewishamil10n valewis and sewis writer. always has the Correct Takes. @effervescentdragon sewis. brocedes. sebchal. charlos. pretty much whatever is poking at akira’s brain at that moment is what she is writing. @azzy421 mainly sewis. the writer of the lucky thirteen au! @trailsofpaper also mainly sewis. the writer of The sewis Knight au. @tinytauris and @yukierres are both doing god’s work filling the yukierre ao3 tag. @collarboen sewis and is also a miles/lewis truther! every single one of these writers have knocked me the fuck out with their writing. just saying.

artist blogs

@andreagrimes writer. also a valtteri blog and v v funny. their style of drawing is one of my fav. @russilton writer. george/lewis blog. mark also bullies kyle on main so like. follow him even just for that lol. @ilikecarsandlike4people and @storm3326 they both do v different kinds of doodles and art styles and i love them both

gifmakers

@ferrawri this is fran. if i loved her less i could talk about it more. posts daniel, lewis and motogp. mostly fabio and marc. @userhamilton posts seb, lewis, mick and lance mainly. has only one wrong opinion but that’s about the sebstache and i’ve given up trying to get ppl to see that light on that. @mickschumachergf posts v cool gifs of lewis and seb and mick etc. and is into fe! (also v funny and sometimes does these cool gif sets with subtitles or smth different and funky with them and they’re fantastic everytime). @formulaonedirection posts mainly lewis and lando. (her tags? genius and comical). @eliotheeangelis posts old f1. a godsend truly

editors/graphic makers

@queerbenched the funkiest graphics. @brawn-gp v v cool edits. @ivettel the most insane gif-editor i know. like half the time i’m like literally HOW are you doing this. fairly sure pure magic (and sooo much skill) is the answer. and writer and seb main. @yukierree v cool and colourful graphics and edits.

lewis blogs

@teamroscoes and @l8tof1 are The lewis blogs. @localoptimist and @lewishcmilton are v funny and have the best takes on things. @4405x sewis main. @sweetaswithscottymac also into fe! @vvettell also posts about seb and alex and fe! (also v funny and nice and i love seeing her takes on stuff)

seb blogs

@wdcseb also a writer! of the sebchal agenda. @unhinged-vettel v funny and really cool edits. @seblicha also v funny and chill

mick blogs

@princemick if you follow me you should definitely follow kyle lmao. at least just for context. they also make cool gifs and graphics too ig. @acrosstobear The Mick Blog . @mickbetsch the coolest gif-edits fr.

yuki blogs

@tsuchansworld and @tsu22 are both yuki blogs and are always correct. @lewki The yuki and lewis blog.

valtteri blogs

@eleyhsa and @garnetaldebaran are The valtteri blogs.

alex blogs

@raceweek her text posts never fail to make me laugh. @alxalb the funniest tags.

fe blogs

@sweetaswithscottymac also posts about lewis and indycar. @mickstart also has the Best michael schumacher takes and just takes in general. @andrelottering also a writer and i think into indycar too? (pls i’m so sorry if i’m wrong)

[xprojectrpg]

This Day in X-Project - October 20

2015: Miles texts Warren about needing a favor in the form of Star Wars tickets. Gabriel texts Miles asking if that sound was him. Wade posts about returning from the woods and in need of tacos and if he should be concerned about the noise coming from the second floor. Miles texts Ganke Lee saying mission accomplished and that they have opening night tickets for Star Wars: The Force Awakens.

2016:

2017: Alex makes an Instagram cross post of a very tired Mrs. Summers. Clarice makes an impassioned journal entry imploring bearded men to improve the grooming standards of said beards. Jubilee texts Amanda about a potential broken liver.

2018: Felicia posts from her soon to be private island on her birthday. Topaz texts Hope, Tandy, and Ty begging for help with organizing Diwali.

2019: While picking up medical supplies, Molly and Sharon F.stop a crime in progress. Kyle shares a YouTube video of The World's 10 Scariest Rides.

2020:

2021: X-Men: Lone Sentinel: Jean-Phillipe posts to his journal rather than the teams journal with a mission wrap. Kyle comments to his journal while high on pain medication.

2022: Nica finds Alison's YouTube channel.

2023: Alani visits the X-Factor offices and talks to Quentin about Sam’s interest in joining the team. Arthur announces the Salem Centre Educational Board is holding a Haunted Corn Maze extravaganza on Saturday for Halloween. Liam announces his dad is sending him moose meat the next time he goes hunting, in the wake of the previous day’s journal thread. Kyle, Sharon and Doug make use of the chapel's funky vending machine and talk about realities, quantum mechanics, and a different purple cat.

[krakenbait]

olympic update: 2/6

hi everyone! if you didn’t already know, i’m a huge fan of the olympics (notice that my friendly kraken icon has some funky glasses now...) i love the sports and the spectacle, and it’s basically the only time you’ll catch me being a very patriotic american (lol). since the 2018 winter olympics, i’ve been making what is essentially a text newsletter for my friends, recapping what happened the day before. i’m doing the same this year, but i also remembered that i now have a tumblr blog where i post about sports, so why not share my updates with y’all? 

for the rest of the games, i’ll be sharing my daily recap of what happened in bejing, with medalists, event explanations, what to watch, and an updated medal count. it’ll mostly be about the bigger events, so if there’s a more niche sport you like and want to see covered (like my friend who wants curling updates), let me know and i’ll do my best to include it. these updates will also be pretty US-centric, so same deal, just let me know if there’s another country you want to see specifically. without further ado, let’s get to it!

-----------------------------------------

Yesterday was a busy day in Beijing, so here’s what happened:

Women’s snowboard slopestyle was quite eventful. Zoi Sadowski-Synott of New Zealand took gold with a set of jumps her opponents couldn’t match, earning the first ever medal for New Zealand at the Winter Olympics. Sadowski-Synott is also the only other woman to win Olympic slopestyle gold, after American Jamie Anderson had a disappointing set of runs and missed out on the three-peat. The Americans were not left off the podium, though. Julia Marino took silver, earning the US its first medal of these games. Australian Tess Coady earned bronze. And if you weren’t watching it last night, be sure to look up the clip of all the snowboarders piling into a group hug to congratulate each other!

The other big event last night was figure skating, with women’s short program and men’s free skate took the ice in the team event. The story of the night was 15 year old Russian Kamila Valiyeva, who had a performance as close to perfect as you could get, earning a remarkable score of 90.18 that blew past her nearest challenger’s 74.73. Her performance also helped Russia overtake the US in the team standings, especially as Americans Karen Chen and Vincent Zhou faltered in their skates. The US is mathematically guaranteed at least a medal, but it will be up to Madison Chock and Evan Bates’ free dance, Alexa Knierim and Brandon Frazier’s pairs free skate, and Karen Chen’s free skate to determine what that medal is.

Once again, the US routed Switzerland in women’s hockey. The 8-0 final score came off a shutout from Alex Cavallini and two goals each for Hilary Knight, Kelly Panek, and Jesse Compher.

Aleksander Bolshunov of Russia won gold in the men’s 30km skiathlon, earning the Russian Olympic Committee its first gold.

Johannes Ludwig of Germany won gold in men’s single luge. American Chris Mazdzer landed in eighth.

Kobayashi Ryoyu of Japan won gold in men’s normal hill ski jumping.

Jakara Anthony of Australia won gold in women’s freestyle skiing moguls. American Jaelin Kauf earned silver.

Nils van der Poel of Sweden won speed skating gold in the men’s 5000, coming from behind in his last two laps to defeat Patrick Roest of the Netherlands and setting a new Olympic record in the process. But his speed is probably the least interesting thing about van der Poel- he’s a speedskater who hates speedskating. After finishing 14th at the 2018 Olympics, van der Poel stopped skating, joined the Swedish army, and started running ultramarathons. As he said post-win, “When you are a professional athlete in a sport that sucks as much as speedskating sucks, you’ve got to find a way to make it suck a little less.” And here’s another sound bite. When asked if this was his last season, van der Poel said, “I’ve been trying to quit two times and I haven’t succeeded. I don’t think I’ll succeed this time either. Maybe.” If that isn’t a vibe.

Australia is making its first ever appearance in curling, and they got their first win yesterday, with the mixed doubles pair of Tahli Gill and Dean Hewitt defeating Switzerland 9-6.

Meanwhile, also in curling, the US lost to Switzerland but takes on Great Britain later today in more mixed doubles round robin.

The men’s downhill event in alpine skiing was postponed to tonight after high winds stopped it from happening yesterday. Now we’ve got a skiing double header, with men’s downhill followed by women’s giant slalom (and the first appearance for Mikaela Shiffrin).

In other news, Elana Meyers Taylor, the gold medal favorite bobsledder, is out of quarantine, allowing her to get back to training for the two-woman and monobob events she will be competing in later.

Here’s today’s watch list (all times in EST): 

Mixed doubles curling- US vs Great Britain (8:05pm)

Figure skating team event- pairs free skate (8:15 pm)

Alpine skiing women’s giant slalom (8:30 pm)

Freestyle skiing women’s big air qualifying (8:30 pm)

Figure skating team event- free dance (9:30 pm)

Figure skating team event- women’s free skate (10:35 pm)

Alpine skiing men’s downhill (11 pm)

Men’s slopestyle finals (11 pm)

And medal count as of this morning:

Have a great day everyone!

(also gonna tag some friends who might find this interesting: @washyourdamnhands @sonnymilano​ @18minutemajor​ )

[part-time-deranged]

AYO THANKS FOR THE TAG!!

Top ten people you would not assume use masc pronouns but ah well

This is so fun!! And callout

@obsessing-over-stuff-since-birth @hesitantdream @drownmyselfinthelake @maflida @asexualmisconduct @white-spirit-of-darkness @drop-the-curtain-123 @beccibarnes @fatalism-and-villainy and anyone else who wants to join! Its great:)

made a tag game!

take my uquiz and do this picrew

no pressure tags: @az-is-somewhere-else @roahthefunkpoet @i-got-da-rubes @wingl3ssthing @hauntedestablishments @7410s @joplinspiderz @spinspoon @airbluest @trannydean @queerplatonicboyfriend @dakrapatops @zeloxriel @jacklesbrainworms @cipher-of-the-round-table @eggie-o @cyclicalaberration @pink-station-zero-zero @caffeineecold @tiredstressedemotionalmess @mike-queerler @nerf-cat @foliefaggot @defectivegembrain @melanch0ly-gh0st @dicklessswonder @gooseberry--fool @girlatreus @reportinglivefromsoda @girlbrianmolko @unfashionableboybush @tazdrgaoneyetagain @endren oh man this is way too many people. i started tagging a couple mutuals and then i got carried away. sorry yall. uh. just anyone who sees this 👍

[komkommertijd]

F1 2020 Grid as German rap songs

Since the 2020 season has come to an end, I thought it might be a good idea to finally share this thing that I’ve been working on since June. I have no idea as to why or how I had this idea, but I’m sure I’m not the first one to do this, anyway. I’m sorry to all my fellow Germans in advance <3

Disclaimer: I translated all of the lyrics myself so some things might not be completely accurate, for which I can only apologize. I do not agree with the way some rappers portray women, so I made sure to steer clear from those lyrics.

(post under the cut because it got kinda very long whoops)

Lewis - Vintage (RIN)

Oh Lord, wo soll das Ganze enden? Fahr' so schnell, ich wechsel' jede Woche Bremsen

[Oh Lord, where is this supposed to end? Driving so fast, I’m changing brakes every week]

It’s a song about being a champion, living a luxury life, nice clothes, and well...driving fast cars. Any more questions? Rin is one of my favorite German rap artists, so I just had to include his songs, and this one makes you feel like a real badass, just like our king Lewis 😌

Valtteri - In meinem Benz (AK Ausserkontrolle, Bonez MC)

Du siehst mich im Benz sitzen, so wie Lewis Hamilton

[You see me sitting in a Benz, just like Lewis Hamilton]

It’s kind of obvious why I chose that song, right? Other than that specific line there are some more parts about how much the rapper apparently loves his Mercedes and this song just screamed Valtteri to me.

Charles - NENENE (Fero47)

Sitze bald in roten Ferrari Geben Gas in der Hood Ruf' ich danach, "C'est la vie!"

[I’ll soon sit in a red Ferrari Rev up in my hood Shouting “C’est la vie!” afterward]

Ignoring the entire part about Monte Carlo and all the French words, this specific part just always reminds me of Charles when I listen to the song. More badass vibes but less seriously so because I can’t take Fero’s voice that serious at all, which fits Charles.

Sebastian - Ferrari (Eno, MERO)

Roter Ferrari Ich gebe Gas in einem Ferrari Roter Ferrari Yeah, ich sitze tief in einem Ferrari

[Red Ferrari I rev up in a red Ferrari Red Ferrari Yeah, I’m sitting deep inside a Ferrari]

There’s a part about “rolling with [a] bro in a white Mercedes” and my brain said Sewis rights. Other than that, this is once again a rather obvious choice, if not all that up to date anymore. Some lines about racing on the German highway, so of course I had to go for Sebastian with this one.

Max - Fame (Apache207)

Die Rapszene ist nur ein Affenzirkus In dem kleine Kinder gern mit Waffen hantieren Ich steh', wo ich steh', weil ich bin, wer ich bin Und nicht weil hier irgendjemand Apache platziert

[The rap scene is a madhouse Where little kids like to make use of guns I stand where I stand because I am who I am And not because someone places Apache]

This simply gives me Max vibes, I don’t have much more to say as an explanation. It just feels right, with criticism towards mentally “weaker” individuals and the confidence in making a name for oneself based on own achievements and hard work. Also, Apache has become a rather popular musician in the past year(s) (especially to obnoxious 5th graders, all tea no shade), which is just...Max, I won’t elaborate.

Alex - HONDA (Ansu)

Hold on, kommt was Schnell – Konter Dreamer, besonders – Willy Wonka Auto – Honda

[Hold on, there’s something coming Fast - Counterattack Dreamer, special - Willy Wonka Car - Honda]

I mean, it’s a song about a Honda driver? I struggled quite a bit with finding a song for Alex, but when I first listened to this song, my mind threw his name at me in blinking neon letters, so this is the vibe we’re going with - a funky fast Honda driver <3 (PS: I have no clue what the Willy Wonka thing is about but....why not)

Carlos - Habibi (Casar)

Sie schreibt: "Habibi", denn sie vermisst mich Ich fahre weit davon mit mein'n Hermanos

[She texts me “Habibi” because she misses me I drive far away with my hermanos]

I can only listen to the word “hermanos” so many times without my mind associating it with Carlos, so this one was a rather obvious choice for me as well. Also, there are some parts about Spain in this song so I had to be lame and do the obvious with this one.

Lando - 500 PS (Bonez MC, RAF Camora)

Ich drück' aufs Gas, hör' die 500 PS Fahren durch die Stadt, GTA Los Angeles

[I step on the gas, hear the 500 HP Cruising through the city, GTA Los Angeles]

This one’s a solid mainstream German rap song (not that I’d call Lando a mainstream person), liked to some extent by most people, and it gets you moving, which reminds me a lot of Lando. Cars and mentions of a video game make for a hit and Lando unites just that in person as well.

Daniel - Emotions 2.0 (Ufo361, Céline)

Baby, nimm einen Schluck Dom P. für die Emotions Ich erhöhe deine Dosis So viel Schmuck Mehr Drip als ein Ocean

[Baby take a sip Dom P for the emotions I’m increasing your dosage So much jewelry More drip than an ocean]

A bittersweet love song with rich boy summer vibes and one of my favorite German songs to be released this year, in fact, it’s my most listened to song on my phone, make for a combination that just screams Daniel to me. This song hits different when driving into the sunset in a fancy car or when biking through town at 1:30 am on three cans of Red Bull (believe me, I tried), and always reminds me of better times. It’s the ideal song to sing and rap along to, so that matches Daniel just fine.

Esteban - Einsneunzig (Brown-Eyes White Boy)

Bin fast einsneunzig, stell' mich auf die Bündel, das' ein Weltrekord Lass' die Zeit Revue passier'n, selbe Jungs und selber Ort

[I’m almost 1.90, stand on a wad of cash, that’s a world record Let’s recall the past, same guys and same place]

1.90 meters as a reference to Esteban’s height, obviously, simply made sense to me, once again. The second line reminds me of his feud with Pierre, so I had to choose this song. It’s better than Ratten im Hof (rats in the yard), and this reminds me of a wannabe gangster, which just screams Esteban to me, I’m sorry <3

Pierre - DAS RENNEN (RIN)

Ich hoff', eines Tages, wir gewinn'n das Rennen Wie bei Red Dead Redemption Irgendwann der Letzte wie Shanks Spinner Rims glänzen

[I hope one day we win the race Just like in Red Dead Redemption One day the last like Shanks Spinner rims are shining]

I know no one will believe this story but I started working on this post like half a year ago and I chose that song for Pierre back then and uhm, manifestation worked, I guess? Once again, I’m a big fan of Rin’s music, so choosing this song for Pierre is a bit like selfcare. The lyrics mention changing the world and well, so far Pierre has as least changed my world 😌

Daniil - One Night Stand (Capital Bra)

Ty moja ljubimaja Takaja diwnaja, krasiwaja-ja Sprawjedliwaja, njepobjedimaja Ty moja-ja, Baby, ty moja-ja

[You are my darling Such a wondeful, beauty Fair, invincible You’re mine baby, you’re mine]

I really hope I got that translation more or less right but other than that, I didn’t simply choose that song based on the Russian part. It’s a song we used to listen to a lot a few years ago and one of those from the days where Capital Bra was famous but less so than he is today. It reminds me of simpler times and it’s a pretty vibey song that, if you allow it to, draws you in and makes you dance. I have a soft spot for Daniil and the song reminds me a bit of him.

Lance - Bronx (Veysel)

Du musst doppelt zahlen, deshalb krieg' ich es umsonst Audemars, Yves Saint Laurent, eine Villa irgendwo Audemars, Yves Saint Laurent, ein paar Villen irgendwo

[You have to pay double that’s why I get it for free Audemars, Yves Saint Laurent, a mansion somewhere Audemars, Yves Saint Laurent, a few mansions somewhere]

This is a song that you have to listen to on high volume in a fast car, one that once again has really badass vibes. It’s nice to rap along to and hard not to move to. The rich boy vibes in the chorus that I’ve included in this post are pretty inevitable and logically, I had to associate that with Lance. When I turn this song on, everyone enjoys it, and I think Lance deserves to evoke that emotion in everyone as well.

Sergio - AVENTADOR (Dardan, Eno, Noah)

Roll' im Aventador Ich fahr' grad vor Gebe Gas, sag': "¡Adiós!"

[Roll in an Aventador I hit the road Step on the gas, say “¡Adiós!”]

I mean yeah, I could have chosen that song only because of the Adiós but that’s a bit lame even for me. Instead, the entire fast car vibe reminded me a lot of Checo. I’ve always had a bit of a soft spot for him and this year he once again showed people ([coughs] my brother) that he’s been severely underestimated. So stepping on the gas and outpacing everyone else felt like the right vibe.

Kimi - Sorry Not Sorry (Monet192, Takt32, badmómzjay)

Was du für Karriere machst, mach' ich als Hobby Was du für Probleme hast, interessiert keinen

[What you made your career, I do as a hobby What problems you have, no one cares]

The title itself embodies Kimi and so does the entire song. The not giving a shit vibe, paired with the mention of the hobby thing as an indirect reference to the famous Kimi quote about seeing his job more as a hobby, are just 100% Kimi. I really couldn’t have found a better song for him. 

Antonio - Maserati (RAF Camora)

Capo dei capi Trip noch im Alfa, doch bald Maserati

[Capo dei capi Trip still in an Alfa but soon in a Maserati]

I did very much not choose the song because “capo dei capi” (the boss of bosses) is a mafia related thing, but because of the Alfa part, duh. Roadtrips in an Alfa along the Adriatic coast are cool and all but a Maserati is obviously the main goal, and that reminds me of Antonio quite a lot ~for some reason~. The entire part about making it far in life without a “serious” job is just very F1, so the vibes are there. Happy very belated birthday Toni <3

Romain - HOCH (CRO)

Alles holt dich down, lass es einfach los Und die Dinge unter dir sind gar nicht mehr so groß Ich schau' nach oben und auf einmal geht's hoch

[Everything drags you down, just let it go And the things below you are not as big anymore I look up and suddenly it goes upwards]

This song is just very peaceful and calms my mind when I listen to it, which radiates the same comforting vibe as Romain. The topic of rising despite things dragging you down are a very prominent topic here and reminded me a lot of him, especially with him leaving Haas and everything around that. It just feels nice to listen to a bit of an uplifting song once in a while, and this one does it in a way that still allows you to feel calm and safe, which is something I associate with Romain a lot.

Kevin - Vorbei (Nico Rosseburg, Sierra Kidd)

Sag mir bitte, wie passe ich die Zeit? Der Augenblick war schön, doch es ist vorbei

[Please tell me, how do I pass the time? The moment was nice but now it’s over]

With Kevin leaving F1, I had to go for this song for him. It’s a bit more of a sad topic (so am I with the knowledge of him not being there next year) but without making the entire thing sound melancholic. I only really learned to appreciate Kevin this year and I’ll miss having him around, so this song kind of fits that idea for me.

George - 20 Zoll MAE (Celo&Abdi, Bonez MC)

Ich fahr' mit Schrittgeschwindigkeit, so wie ein Don Hättest gerne meine Felgen, aber wirst sie nicht bekommen

[I drive at walking pace like a Don You’d like to have my rims but won’t get them]

Making this solely about driving at walking pace would be a bit mean but there’s a part in the song soon after about looking beautiful in a Mercedes, so that’s pretty much George. The song just carries that fun vibe and the subtle (not really) flex, which makes it great to listen to if you want to get in a happier mood. It’s a song about Mercedes rims, of course I had to choose George 😔

Nicholas - Standard (KitschKrieg, SFR, Trettmann, Gzuz, Gringo, Ufo361)

Treff' mich in Miami, fliege nur noch First-Class Nur noch unterwegs, kriege Heimweh

[Meet me in Miami, only flying first class anymore Only on the road anymore, getting homesick]

More ~rich boy vibes~ and a song that has been playing what feels like 24/7 on MTV Germany the last two years. It got so bad that some people around me still reply in the trademark Gzuz voice when someone uses the word “standard”. Anyway, I associate this song with Nicholas because just like KitschKrieg did with their first “own” song, Nicholas has joined the game and left an impression on everyone, in one way or another, and I’m willing to see/hear more of that :)

[on-stand-bi-help]

So I this are just a bunch of texts that I sent my cousin and I thought why not post it on Tumblr as well!

Please do not take this seriously this is just some really bad comedy. Hope you enjoy. (Also this does have swear words and I mean a lot of swear words so you have been warned.)

Ok I haven’t edit this at all so sorry for my grammar and sorry if this doesn’t make sense

So a new MLB episode came out and it’s a special? Idk to be honest but here are my thoughts cause I want you to watch it! So there is a fucking new intro! It reminds me of the old Barbie movies intros not gonna lie but I guess it’s kinda cool.

Ok so their flying abilities or powers or whatever look really weird and I don’t like them. Alya showing the camera back and forth gave me a headache.

Ok but Ladybugs knowing about roses and their meanings gives me fanfic vibes not gonna lie. Chat trying his best too whoo Ladybug and respecting their boundaries (which she made by the way) freaking adorable not gonna lie. Chat being flustered fuck I just realized how much I missed him. Ugh Ladybug’s soft look and as soon as she leaves Chat’s soft look fuck they are adorable omg. Ok Chat saying that he needs to give himself some flowers cause he is amazing. 100% agree 10/10 you deserve it. TREAT YO SELF!

Ugh definitely did not miss Marinette’s obsession with Adrien omg. She’s really trying to lie to tikki bro you’re with her all the time. You can’t lie to her plus she’s been alive since the beginning of the universe and you’re telling me you are honestly trying to lie to her. God damnit Marinette you are such a dumbass.

LMAO THE STUDENT FILM OH MY FUCKING GOD!! THAT’S SO FUNNY!

God damn I saw on tumblr people comparing Draco to Chloe and I’m like bro Draco is a meme and a great character. Chloe is a bitch who is so fucking annoying.

OMG THE TEACHER IS PREGNANT ALL SHE HAD TO SAY WAS I HAVE MEDICAL EXAMS AND I KNEW!!! FUCKKKK YESSSS A RED HEADED BABY!!!

Can you imagine there is a whole episode where the class has to take care of the baby (for whatever reason) and all of them freaking out cause this baby is too precious and Alya coming in and saving the day and being like guys calm down. It’s all good. Nino fucking going soft trying to help Alya as best as he can. Marinette and Adrien never doing this before so both of them are super flustered and nervous! God I WOULD LITERALLY KILL FOR THAT EPISODE NOW HOLY SHIT!!!

Ok damn Kim really ain’t holding back like chill dude. He really just told the principal that the science teacher isn’t cool. You tell that to your friends not the fucking principal. You dumbass.

LILA IS HERE FUCK!!! God not only do I have to deal with Chloe’s bullshit but Lila’s too omg. Ok idk if it’s the website that I’m watching it in but their voices sound weird and I hope it’s just the website and not the actual episode.

Marinette shut the fuck up ADRIEN WAS TALKING BITCH!!! YOU INTERRUPTED HIM!!! Lmao nice save Marinette talking about the film to distract everyone from the fact that you like Adrien. GOD DAMNIT ADRIEN’S SOFT LOOK FUCK!!! HE LOVES HER SO MUCH BUT HE DOESN'T KNOW IT YET OMG!!! GOD DAMN!!! Lmao Lila’s face! Yeah fuck you Lila! Bitchass!

So Marinette is telling everyone that she is over Adrien. Alya isn’t falling for this bullshit! Love that. Marinette, why are you lying just ask them to help you move on. Like I can see the effort but I don’t understand why you are lying about it if you aren’t completely over him. Like bruh. ALEX REALLY SAID “No kidding” to when Marinette said that she was acting crazy. YES ALEX QUEEN! CALL HER OUT! Marinette saying that she just wants to be friends with him and not in love with him. (ARE WE FINALLY GETTING THE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT THAT WE ALL DESERVE HOLY SHIT IM LIVING!) Nope nvm she’s still on her bullshit. Did Alya just say that if Marinette will be ok with her and Adrien going to New York together because it may be too romantic. Like Bitch YOU GUYS LIVE IN PARIS! I'M SURE SHE WILL BE FINE!

FUCK YOU GABRIEL!! DIDN’T MISS YOU AT ALL YOU FUNKY ASS BITCH!!!

BRUH ANOTHER MIRACULOUS FOR REAL!!!

DAMN! Lmao Marinette trying to look tough that’s so funny to me! Who you trying to scare bitch cause you ain’t fooling anyone. Bruh Gabriel really friendzoned Marinette for Adrien lmao! Omg I love that. Fuck. I hate Gabriel so much.

I DIDN’T KNOW KIGMA WAS GOING TO BE IN THIS EPISODE!! YAY! EW WTF DID SHE JUST KISS HIM! ARE YOU KIDDING! WAIT WHEN DID THEY GET TOGETHER!! WTF! I DON’T REMEMBER THIS!

Marinette you are so annoying. Where’s Ladybug?! SHE’S SO MUCH BETTER! HOLY SHIT IT’S LADYBUG! OK BUT THAT SCENERY LOOKS SO ROMANTIC! Wait yeah both of them are going to New York like who is going to protect the city?! Oh shit nvm I’m a dumbass hawk moth is going too. Lmao! I’m an idiot! Ok BUT THAT WEIRD BUTTON THING IS ADORABLE OMG!!! AWWW! LIKE WTF!! I WANT ONE! BRUH HOW CAN SHE NOT LIKE CHAT NOIR WTF IS WRONG WITH HER!!! GODAMNIT!

Gabriel really said Surprise bitch to Adrien lmao. Damn poor Gorilla. I can’t believe he still doesn’t have a fucking name godamnit. Lmao I love plagg. Ew god damnit fuck you GABRIEL!

OMG LUKAAAAA! Marinette fucking date him already wtf. He is literally biking your stupid ass to catch up to the bus. GOD LUKA DESERVES BETTER! Marinette you always fucking ruin the moment fuck you. Fuck you. AGAIN LUKA DESERVES BETTER! Luka honey no don’t look at her like that you deserve better. Flashback to the perks of being a wallflower quote, “We accept the love we think we deserve” FUCK YOU BRAIN WHY YOU DO ME LIKE THIS!!

ALYA IS A TRUE FRIEND!!! Bro my friends would be laughing their ass off and making funny faces at the window instead of asking the teachers to stop the bus. HE WAS CARRYING HER SUITCASE TOO OMG! BRO LUKA HAS SOME STRONG ASS LEGS LIKE DAMN!!! Luka then says, “You know what’s important Marinette, that this trip gives you some clarity.” PLEASE GOD THAT SHE FALLS FOR CAT NOIR!!! PLEASE THAT SHE STARTS LIKING HIM!!! PLEASE! BITCH WHY KISS HIM ON THE CHEEK OMG WHY?! He likes you and you decide to kiss him on the cheek. Bro you are just making him fall for you more. Goddammit you are an idiot.

Bruh one look at Adrien and she becomes a tomato god damn. Am I being hard on Marinette cause she reminds me of me. NO WTF!!! Shut up! (At least I’m not a stalker or someone who gets obsessed with my crush in obnoxious ways.)

FUCK YOU CHLOE WE DIDNT WANT YOU TO COME YOU STUPID HOEEE!!!

I JUST REALIZED THIS IS A MOVIE!!! 12 minutes in and I just realized this is a movie. I AM AN IDIOT!!! God I’m so dumb lol. Ok this animation not gonna lie is kinda good.

He really yelled at Marinette in front of everybody in a plane huh. That’s so funny. Also he sounded like such a jock like wtf was that. Lmao Alya and Nino just looking at them like yessss our ship!!! (Alya and Nino are such a mood) This movie is literally like a fucking fan fiction. Adrien, “Oh yeah you’re sitting next to me!” Marinette fucking panicking. Omg this is literally a fanfic. I can’t! I love this omg. I LOVE ALYA SO MUCH OMG!!! Did Marinette just call Adrien her husband. YOU’RE LIKE 14 SHUT UP!!! PLEASE!!! How can you confuse husband with friend. Ok this just confirms that Marinette constantly daydreams to herself and tells herself that Adrien is her husband. Girl, GIRL YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW HIM VERY WELL. SHE’S NOT EVEN IN LOVE SHE’S JUST FASCINATED WITH THE IDEA OF HIM. Ugh this is why I don’t like the idea of Marinette and Adrien or Ladybug and Adrien being together. Like she barely knows him and she counts that as love. Jesus. Lmao Gorilla has and will always ship Marinette and Adrien together. You can not change my mind.

Brooo if Marinette had a penis she would definitely have gotten a boner when Adrien fell on her. WHY IS MARINETTE LIKE THIS?! (Ok yes if my crush not that I have one but if I did I would probably do all the shit she is doing but I wouldn’t run away I would fucking just be in shock and freeze. Probably idk. THIS IS GIVING ME TO MUCH SECOND HAND EMBARRASSMENT PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD ACT NORMAL FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE.) Did Alya just say that “New York is the most romantic place in the world!” AGAIN YOU LIVE IN PARIS!!! OH SHIT NVM. I paused it too soon. She continues by saying, “After Paris obviously.” Ok my bad. Ok are we talking about the same New York cause New York isn’t that romantic. Then again what do I know. Marinette FUCK YOU!!! YOU COULD HAVE SAT WITH ADRIEN AND NOW YOU HAVE TO SIT WITH THE FUCKING PRINCIPLE. Lmao this is giving me fucking Spider-Man Far From Home flashbacks. Bro Adrien looks so disappointed. FUCK YOU MARINETTE! Bro gorilla is such a mood. Putting a 10 for both having a fear of flying and for needing relaxation. Wait why doesn’t he have eyebrows? I just realized that. I mean I knew but like I didn’t realize idk if that makes sense.

Dude the principal sleeping on Marinette THAT HAPPENED IN FAR FROM HOME!!! Wait a damn minute in Far From Home Peter lives in New York and goes somewhere in Europe (I forgot where) AND MARINETTE LIVES IN FRANCE AND SHE GOES TO NEW YORK!!! Not only that but these are both superhero movies and they are both in love with someone except here Marinette is trying to get over Adrien while Peter Parker was trying to win over MJ. OK SOMEONE ON THE CREATIVE TEAM LITERALLY WATCHED FAR FROM HOME AND SAID YES LET’S DO THIS BUT THE OPPOSITE. I CAN’T THIS IS SO FUNNY!

AWWWW Alya and Nino sleeping on each other IS EVERYTHING!!! I SHIP THEM SO MUCH!!! IVAN AND MYLENE TOO!!! THEY REALLY WANT TO KILL ME HUH!? WAIT ROSE AND JUELKA FUCK YESSS THE GAYS ARE WINNING!!! MY MULTISHIPPER HEART CAN’T TAKE THIS MUCH POWER ALL IN A MATTER OF SECONDS!!! THIS IS BEAUTIFUL!!!

Dude I literally thought she said shit for a second I WAS LIKE WHAT?! But she said shoot. I really hope that’s not toilet water on her shirt. MARINETTE YOU HAVE A NAPKIN? OR TOILET PAPER ON YOUR HAIR?! GET THAT SHIT OUT OF THERE?!

Awww the sunset is so pretty. And Adrien is going to come in 3 2 1. Right on time. Adrien, “It's beautiful isn’t it?” I’m expecting Marinette to say, “Yeah but so are you.” and immediately regretting afterwards. Nvm she trips on him instead. Should have seen that coming. Ok now they are looking out the window again. This frame would be so cute if she didn’t have that stupid Toilet paper in her hair. Bruh Adrien just stands next to her and doesn’t even mention the Toilet paper on her hair. Adrien be like, “Yup just me and my fashionista friend Marinette looking at the window. Oh she has a piece of toilet paper in her hair. Damn must be a new trend I don’t know about. That’s kinda sus cause I am a model but whatever she knows more about fashion then I do so it’s all good.” (Not an actual quote.) Damn Alya and Nino ship them so much. Ok but what a mood!

Adrien says, “You're always willing to take a chance on something or someone even when no one else is.” Yeah bruh it’s because she is ladybug, I mean come on how do you not realize. Adrien really smirked at her whole shit! Adrien continues by saying, “You got something Marinette.” Marinette asks, “Something?” WAIT HOLD UP ISN’T HE DATING KAGAMI!!! WAIT IS MARINETTE A HOMEWRECKER!!! I’m kidding. Ok not really. Wait is Adrien a cheater like what?! Adrien continues by saying, “Yeah there in your hair.” He grabs the fucking piece of toilet paper. I LITERALLY FORGOT IT WAS THERE AND I BURST OUT LAUGHING!!! GOD I LOVE THIS MOVIE!!!

Alya is a mood, “I can’t decide if they are the cutest people I know or the most embarrassing.” Literally me whenever I watch Miraculous ladybug. Also this literally sounds like something fanfic Alya would say. Not canon Alya. But I really love how they let Alya say that. Good call team! Omg Nino continues with, “Yeah I love Adrien but he is like a baby chick that just started cracking out of his egg he has a hard time understanding the signals people send them.” THIS LITERALLY SOUNDS LIKE A FANFIC AND I LOVE IT!!! OMG!!! I LOVE OPERATION NEW YORK OMG!!! YESSSSSSSS!!! ALYA AND NINO ARE LITERALLY OUR SAVIORS!!! GOD DAMN I LOVE THEM!!! ADRIEN HUGGED HER AWWWWW!!! I LOVE HIM!

THERE’S ANOTHER SUPER VILLAIN WTF!!! He really wants to kill the people huh. I mean he must be pure evil cause he literally is tearing the airplane apart. He really said: There's tons of people in this airplane huh. Welp I really need this technology so I guess they have to die!

DUDE WHO THE FUCK IS THIS GIRL? I can’t tell if she is a robot or a superhero! MAYBE BOTH!!! ALYA IS SUCH A SUPERHERO NERD I LOVE HER!!! OK this other girl superhero is literally captain marvel. She’s not Majestia (idk if that’s how you spell it) nah she’s captain marvel. LMAO WHEN CAPTAIN MARVEL MAKES AN APPEARANCE IN THE MLB MOVIE AND DOESN’T HAVE THE AUDACITY TO HELP OUT PETER PARKER IN HIS FIELD TRIP!! DAMN!!! SHE REALLY SAID FUCK YOU PETER! MLB FANDOM NEEDS ME MORE THAT YOU DO!! LIKE GURL PETER IS HAVING AN EMOTIONAL BREAKDOWN CAUSE HIS 3rd father figure died!!! Then again she is saving an airplane fool of people but I’m sure you could have made a quick stop to give Peter some advice but whatever.

God I hate the principal.

CAPTAIN MARVEL REALLY SAID I HAVE TO SAVE MY ROBOT WIFE FROM THAT BOMB!! And she fucking blew the bomb away from her face. DUDE THERE IS SO MANY NEW SUPERHEROES HOLY CRAP!!! Ok including the Captain Marvel and the robot there’s 2 more but that’s more than Paris soooooo. WAIT CAPTAIN MARVEL JUST CALLED HER ROBOT DARLING!!! I was joking, I didn’t think they were together. OK I SHIP IT! Captain Marvel, “Are you alright darling?” (Giving me Spinderella and Netasha vibes not gonna lie) STOPPED IT TOO SOON!!! ROBOT JUST CALLED CAPTAIN MARVEL HER MOTHER!!! ABORT ABORT SHIP!!! I regret making all the comments that I just have made. So ignore them. I no longer ship them. Aw they have such a quote MOTHER AND DAUGHTER RELATIONSHIP!!! They are hugging each other. Adorable.

Bruh Adrien and Marinette are talking openly to plagg and tikki like could you guys be more obvious. Like shut up.

So apparently there’s a superhero for everything in USA. Um I wish if there was USA wouldn’t be as shitty as it is now.

I love Nino and Alya, that's all I’m going to say.

Also the superheros have a code word for the French students and it’s literally ‘the little croissants’ I LOVE THAT OMG!!! WHO CAME UP WITH THAT CODE CAUSE I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!”

Ok turns out Robot girl can actually turn into a regular girl. SO THAT’S COOL!

How is it possible that Adrien and Marinette can’t figure out how the doors work like what?! Ok why the fuck is Adrien constantly catching Marinette every time she falls. Like he isn’t even close to her and he fucking races and catches her. Right he obviously doesn’t like her. Yup I definitely believe that bullshit.

Lmao the robot girl took one look at dumbass Marinette and stupidass Adrien and said, “Those 2 are made for each other.” That’s so funny. Ok robot girl is friends with a girl that has some weird ass earrings (dare I say lesbian). And they both are in school so I’m pretty sure they are the same age. SO I SHIP THEM!!! Grumpy girlfriend and super happy robot girlfriend. ADORABLE!

Lmao they are already going to a party bruh. They just got off of a plane and they almost died. And you’re telling me that they aren’t slightly jet lagged or even a little tired. Bruh come on.

DAMN SABRINA IS GONNA GET A LOVE INTEREST OKKKKKKKK!!! He literally winked at her and she went bright red. DAMN GURL GET IT!!! CHLOE FUCK OFF!!! SABRINA IS GONNA GO FLIRT WITH THE GUY AND NOT BE YOUR STUPID ASSISTANT!!! FUCK YOU!!! GOD DAMNIT CHLOE, SABRINA, MARINETTE AND ALYA ARE ROOMATES BRUHHHHH!!! (And they were roommates- OH MY GOD THEY WERE ROOMMATES NOT NOW BRAIN PLEASE)

Bro the teacher looks at the hallway and nods cause she notices that all the lights are off in the room and no one is talking and she leaves. And immediately all the doors open and everyone is sneaking off to the party. BROOO THIS REMINDS ME OF NHI LOL!!! So the teacher suddenly pops out and asks what’s that noise and they all go into different rooms. The teacher doesn’t notice. And of course Marinette goes into the room with Adrien but on accident, and for a second I thought she was touching his pee pee but no she was just touching his lower stomach lol. They both look at each other and Marinette gets flustered and Adrien smiles softly at her. And she immediately gets away from him and they end up in the same room as ROBOT GIRL AND HER LESBIAN GIRLFRIEND!!! Robot girl is shipping them so hard while her girlfriend is glaring at them.

HER GIRLFRIEND CAN PLAY GUITAR YESSSSS!!!

SABRINA GO TO THE PARTY PLEASE!!! DITCH CHLOE!!! FLIRT WITH THE AMERICAN!!! THE AMERICAN IS FUCKING STANDING OUTSIDE THE WINDOW!!! WAITING FOR HER OMG!!! He takes her hand AND TAKES HER TO THE ROOF PARTY!!! FUCK I SHIP THEM SO HARD!!!

Omg the dialogue in this movie is fucking amazing. Marinette says, “Is it a bird?” Adrien, “Is it a plane?” Sabrina’s soon to be boyfriend, “No IT’S HOT DOG DAN!” Like bitch why is the hot dog cart flying like wtf?! Dude is this how French people see Americans because you know what?! THAT SOUNDS about right. If USA ever gets superhero’s we PROBABLY WOULD HAVE A SUPERHERO WHO SERVES FUCKING HOT DOGS!!! Damn this movie is pretty fucking realistic. The Americans are fucking thirsty for some hot dogs they literally run over Adrien and Marinette like damn ok yes a lot of Americans like hot dogs but we aren’t animals. Turns out the hot dogs are magical. ROSE LITERALLY GOT SUPER STRENGTH AND WAS ABLE TO LIFT UP IVAN!!! QUEEN!!! AW Sabrina got long ass hair like Rapunzel but it’s brown for some reason.

There’s 2 hot dogs left and Nino take initiative and pays for the hot dog and says, “Not a problem. My girl and I can have one and you 2 can have the other.” Damn this really is a fanfic huh. Then again I doubt a fanfic would have them sharing a fucking magical hot dog. Lol! This movie is nuts. They ate the hot dogs (nvm they took a bite of the hotdog and they dropped it on the floor) and they started floating. They grab hands and they are trying not to freak out.

Meanwhile ALYA AND NINO ALL THE FUCKING GET IS THESE HIGH PITCHED VOICES LIKE BRUH. Also Nino ships them so much omg! BRUH HOT DOG DAN EVEN SHIPS THEM! I mean he doesn’t say anything he just looks at them and smiles.

Omg Alya asked Robot’s girlfriend to set the mood with a song! And Robot’s girlfriend is like yeah sure thing. This movie is surreal.

THE SONG IS LITERALLY THE SONG THAT THEY DANCED TOO AT CHLOE’S PARTY OMG!!! I can’t believe I remembered that.

Bruh Adrien literally just repeated what I typed. HE JUST ASKED MARINETTE IF SHE COULD DANCE WITH HIM!!! They are floating and the moon is shining bright on them (Nice job Yue; setting the scene for us I see) and he extends his hand. She starts floating backwards cause she’s freaking out (What a surprise 😒). He grabs her hand and brings her closer to him. WHAT FANFIC AUTHOR WAS ABLE TO GET A FUCKING HIGH BUDGET TO MAKE THIS MOVIE BECAUSE THIS DOESNT FEEL LIKE AN MLB EPISODE!!!

ALSO Marinette is looking at Adrien in a way that makes her look like a Tim burton cartoon character lol. SHE FINALLY GIVES IN AND DANCES WITH HIM IN FRONT OF THE MOON!!! (They aren’t even dancing to be honest they are literally just hugging each other really closely and spinning) BUT ITS ADORABLE SO I FORGIVE THEM!

Lmao they zoom out of the roof party and you just see in the fucking corner Kim and some other dude having a push-up contest. They showed that in the beginning when Alya, Nino, Marinette and Adrien were entering the party. I just wasn’t expecting that in this whole time Kim and the other guy still continued the push-up contest omg. (This is the first 29 minutes and my hand is tired sooo I’m not gonna write anymore)

If anyone wants me to continue I will but I doubt anybody is going to see this post so yeah! Anyway if someone actually read this PROPS TO YOU DUDE!!! HOPE I DIDNT WASTE YOUR TIME!!! HAVE A GOOD YEAR!!!

Edit: I think Robot girl and girl with weird earrings are sisters soooooo I don’t ship them anymore. (I’m honestly really confused are they siblings or not?!)

[part-time-deranged]

oh lord this is gonna take a while but thank you @white-spirit-of-darkness !!!

Pick a song for every letter of your url and then tag that many people

lord may feature my glorius taste in music

P- Punk Rock Loser by Viagra Boys

A- Americas Suithearts by FOB (yeah it took that long for me to cave in)

R- Radio Punk by Bad Nerves

T- The Silent Acquiescence Of Millions by Sinch (mouthful)

T- The Beach by Wolf Alice

I- Inside You by Godhead

M- Maria by Blondie

E- Employee Of The Month by Rascalton

D- Daydreamer by Bilk

E- Electric Landlady by Purson

R- Rocket Ship by Kathy McCarty

A- American Teenager by Ethel Cain (help)

N- New Factory by Italia 90

G- Get Your Money by Wine Lips

E- EMI by Sex Pistols

D- Deaf Dogs by Heart Attack Kids

omg wow that is the most ecclectic mix of music ever jesus

realising ive never given anyone this comprahensive an overview of my music taste those who say saying what you listen to isnt dangerous are WRONG

i clutch my music taste like a newborn child

RIGHT

ill tag @hesitantdream @drownmyselfinthelake @hawkswjnter @ghosts-of-love @fatalism-and-villainy @fullyanimated @asexualmisconduct @amongussexgif @catboyrightsdefender i should tag neil gaiman while im at it summoning the tumblr monarchs @sugarhillpark @catsxratsxbats @cookies-and-trees @uncanny-vermin @willgrahamscock @white-spirit-of-darkness @wrath-rat @emoswiftiewhojustlovestheirdog

oh lord ok HAVE FUN if yall feel like doing this also open to anyone else who wants to join

thanks for the tag @ineffabildaddy <3

pick a song for each letter of your URL, and then tag that many people

tried to choose the first song in my head without repeating artists

s - sabotage by beastie boys

a - angel or small death and codeine scene by hozier

b - burn it down by linkin park

o - one way or another by blondie

t - the fruits by paris paloma

a - apocalypse by cigarettes after sex

g - good old-fashioned lover boy by queen

e - everybody's changing by keane

o - overwhelmed by royal and the serpent

n - no light, no light by florence and the machine

m - my name is human by highly suspect

e - everybody wants to rule the world from tears for fears

r - R U mine? by arctic monkey

c - champagne problems by taylor swift

u - undisclosed desires by muse

r - raise hell from brandi carlile

y - you want it darker from leonard cohen

no-pressure-tagging: @foolishlovers @weasleywrinkles @lineffability @crawley-fell @unicornbeck @white-spirit-of-darkness @teddybearbutchh @lemon-tart-221 @spyghetti13 @tortugay @noblogname765 @faintforestmelody @lizzisgeek @crowleybrekkers @mysticaleyeliner @junee-e @stab-of-hunger

[clawedghouls]

Every man in a youtube horror ARG about slenderman know only 3 thing; Have weird relationship with environments, be awkward on camera, and LIE

It has been a while since I’ve actively done a Text Post on this blog over idly reblogging things, which is a good way to interact with the hell site do not let me discourage you, but I have been watching marble hornets and want to talk about the idea of spatial influence and character drive/motives. 

Before, here are some good pieces of text about the internet that help form my opinions on the matter, some as refreshers and some as set dressing. I will not tell you which. (each numeral has a link, please click)

1.  The American Room by Paul Ford, 2014

2.  Attention K-Mart Shoppers submitted to The Internet Archive by Mark Davis, recordings from 1980′s-1994. 

3. Lambertville Highschool (before demolition), Abandonednj.com, post 2012.

4.  Enter The Marble Hornets' Nest by Kasey Hullett, 2015

5. This House Has People In It, WHAMCITY COMEDY, published by Adult Swim, 2016

Not included is the book : Folklore, Horror Stories, and the Slender Man The Development of an Internet Mythology by Shira Chess, Eric Newsom. which you can find online on Amazon. It informs this somewhat, but as you know I am not king and I hold no bounds. (spoilers ahead)

I spent a decent amount of hours watching MH, and I can immediately see the influence to other videos of its kind. The quality is expected for its age, and influences what it’s saying to the viewer. 

For this, I am going to take EverymanHYBRID as its opposition force, given how it started a year after MH and is related to its universe. EMH, and MH both are the same sort of series- they have the slenderman myths, the same air of mystery, violence, and ARG tendencies- but one uses them in a more symbolic fashion.

MH, which focuses on the at-one-point collaborative and then later outright hostile relationship between Alex and Jay, plays with alot of intriguing concepts that become really prone in every series that it influences. Corruption of self, guilt, destructive and violent relationships that invoke creeping diseases on each individual. The tapes act as markers in the advancement of that sense of foreboding, especially with Jay having to recount 7 months or more of missing memories while walking about in a daze- his thought process both being charming and at once entirely frustrating. Slowly, the characters begin to spiral into something that revolves around chaotic violence and the unbalanced power play between them, Alex, and The Operator.

And that the whole bit really, that they are being withdrawn from the outside world to the point that outside interactions become another extension of their push and pull with each other. The hotel that Jay has been for several months not having to worry about paying for, or even having interactions with housekeeping, become the place where he is swallowed hole by either memories or forces beyond his control. The places, the spaces, become vehicles for the story itself- The hotel does not matter as it is a vessel to hold both him and Jessica. When Alex kills a man who is not even related to the original social bubble who knows what kind of person he is, it becomes a symbol of how irrational the situation has become- especially given how The Operator takes the body away with zero fanfare. The operator is akin to seeing hives bloom across the body, as it is not the cause but the symptom. 

In comparison, EMH lives in a totally seperate rhythm. Its places, and their environment’s stories, are key to why these characters do the things that they do. Every room that is shown, every place they interact with, reacts to them. in the narrative they show with this with long cuts, positioning of selves or props, and in something that MH does fairly well: footage that shows remixed or morphing images/videos of characters and covert messages. A few scenes immediately come to mind about EMH, but the best reflection would be in Jeff’s house and in relation to his little brother. 

At the start, each of the trifecta’s houses are alive. Alive not in the sense of human interaction, but in actively breathing, moving, changing, and its destructive ways. The Operator/Slenderman/That Horrible Thing, enters into the home through crawlspaces, behind closed and out of sight rooms, and even through windows. When Jeff finds a rip in the universe within a closet crawl space that leads him to abandoned places, they close up again when he returns. The same way with his brother, who disappears behind a closed door. Their environments become actively dangerous, the rooms are hungry, they are devouring them whole- the scene in which Evan looks directly into a surveillance camera after being attacked- the back of the cabin at the end of the world where Vinny has to kill his friend in the thick of the PA woods- where Jeff is drowned in a pool or comes walking out of the dark covered in blood- that is a spatial existence which is hostile. 

However, MH is the total opposite. It is not the Rosswood park that is dangerous, it is the fact that Alex is in there. It is not the house you should be afraid to enter, its the people in it, the house is only a witness. Even Alex’s apartment has nothing much to offer the viewer, it is only a place to store tapes and sleep, with so many boxes within. The scene that I thought of the most, especially when drafting this, is in the middle of the Entries, where Jay (the fool) breaks into Alex’s apartment. Jay gets found out almost instantly by Alex, and while trying to escape gets into an altercation with him, who yells that he brought ‘it’ back to his apartment. Jay looks at Alex and screams, realizing that the Operator is right behind him, and runs away- stealing the front door key on his way out. We are not told what happened to Alex after that specific point, and the next entry continues on. 

To Jay, The Operator is a real threat, but to Alex he cannot even see him. In conversations about this, my friend Cirice described it ‘like having a terminal illness and not seeking treatment.’ Alex’s perception can become the reality he is in- and his personal feelings become facts. To him, the reality is that Jay, Jessica, anyone he’s interacted with, is a threat. In the same way The Operator is a threat to Jay and the rest- the way the coughing and their bodies being slowly broken apart is a threat- but Alex holds the power in the relationships when the spatial existence is passive. The Operator acts as a device to move forward the narrative, but the relationships drive it to its conclusions. It doesn't matter the places that MH is located, they’re interchangeable. This is untrue for EMH, where NJ (the area it takes place in) holds like an oppressive cloud over the group. 

To place into a direct metaphor, The Operator in MH is blowing bubbles into the world that interact with only each other and effectively destroy only themselves (or those unfortunate to interact), where as in EMH the metaphor is of a house that’s collapsing on purpose to kill those trashing its insides. 

TLDR;

Marble Hornets: “You want to fuck me so bad it makes you stupid” Alex & Jay, Character driven stories about how power imbalances will kill you, the creeping disease of cruelty and how perception leads you to a fucked up rock climbing wall looking for DVD cassettes you funky little detective. 

EverymanHYBRID: “Hostile Geometry” Spatial horror and your environments will change you in such a way you are unrecognizable to yourself now in the mirror, the house is alive, the house is hungry, and its consuming you whole- and has been for generations.

also, whats up with killing women in both of these series?

[part-time-deranged]

Gay people can never get together normally theres always gotta be a damn jumpscare sex scene

[hornetsgetfunky]

hello everyone!!! this is our first post on our tumblr page!!! i’m so excited to be sharing this with you all because we have a lot of funny stuff to put out there. we hope you enjoy!!! also, make sure to follow our other socials that we have, which will be listed down below. ;)

instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hornetsgetfunky

twitter:

and don’t forget to join our discord server! https://discord.gg/SgafFqc

that’s all for this post, but there will be plenty more to come!!!

-gianna

[humansoulsarg]

Blast from the Past Garfield Comics Solve

On March 28, 2017 - Pangent dropped several modified Garfield comics on the tumblr. Frantic work happened by the team in the discord. You can go find it if you want to relive the chaos. For some reason, it appears this solve was never posted to the humansoulsarg.tumblr.com blog. Today, we aim to remedy that situation. Enjoy! Pangent comics: FEED ME: https://pangenttechnologies.tumblr.com/post/158944128617

Original:

Use a Vigenere cipher to decode the comic. Ciphertext is shown in the Pangent version, the Key is the Original text Panel 1: MR TQIAE MVP WWG ZKBKTQIRO ELE A TRXNOBTIQMA HIZ LBSC LB VP GZO MNLM QITQ EZNI. Hi, there… I’m Jon Arbuckle. I’m a cartoonist, and this is my cat, Garfield. Panel 2: OR TPHAFI MNI AHMNNMIUA CAXJ SDTM MBJ TMFK JU CO WWIATJ PPQOBQIA ERVG AAFQNL. Hi, there. I’m Garfield. I’m a cat, and this is my cartoonist, Jon. Panel 3: XDR QRUY XQQYPQC IB CO ERCHATFMW YSDO. NEJV EPU. Our only thought is to entertain you. Feed me.

Results: panel 1: FJ AJEJA EJG IJG IJHIJFEJC EJE J ADJAGJAIDJH AAH DJGE JB CJ GIJ EJAJ JAAJ AIJA panel 2: HJ AIDJBA AHI JCEJCJAIA AAEJ FAAF EJB BAHI JD JA IJAIAA BCJGIJEJ AJJA AJAIJA panel 3: JJA CEJA EJCEJJJ AJ JA AEJDJAFEJ AEJJ. JAGJ ABA A1-PF convert (set A=1, B=2, C=3, …, J=0, K=A, … P=F) and reverse, recombine into 3-character groups, decode as decimal ASCII: panel 1: 109 101 100 105 097 032 057 048 118 049 107 104 105 053 056 098 097 097 051 050 106 media 90v1khi58baa32j http://mediafire.com/?90v1khi58baa32j unlockering.zip panel 2: 109 101 100 105 097 032 119 109 104 098 122 056 116 051 119 103 053 098 112 049 108 media wmhbz8t3wg5bp1l https://mediafire.com/?wmhbz8t3wg5bp1l breathless.zip panel 3: 12 107 100 051 056 104 051 100 100 053 051 053 100 ?kd38h3dd535d Unsure what to do with this at the moment, let’s look at those ZIPs… unlockering.zip contains unlockering.wav A Kansas City Standard encoded audio file.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kansas_City_standard

Decoding yields a text file with some Vigenere text at the beginning and an ASCII art picture Vigenere with key ‘guineapix’:

The ginger one is called Daisy. She is a special needs pig. She has cataracts in both eyes and is blind. The little one with black nose ears and feet is called Lucy. The big ball of fluff is Annabel. Her breed is Swiss. The one with funky fur on the back end and ginger round the eyes is Boris. A neutered boar who lives with the girls.

breathless.zip contains breathless.wav A Kansas City Standard encoded audio file. Decoding yields a text file with some Vigenere text, decoded with key 'guineapix’:

Lottie, you’d like this. I was reading a book the other day. We’re in the information age, right? All of us, we’re just bombarded by too much information, all the time. Spam emails and social media. Doing really simple things becomes difficult, or complicated, or distracting. We’re all looking for a way to cut through all the noise. It’s easy to blend in and get ignored. It’s an atmosphere which rewards people who really stand out. You have to be bold and spicy and delicious. You’ve got to be a spirit. Can’t be a ghost. Dick Tracy’s on, I’m gonna shut the TV off. There are days when I think we could take over Pangent. The three of us. Take it over and make it right. Maybe that’s just a dream. Maybe that’s the thought that keeps me here. Our mutual friend Alex Schreyer has created a culture of secrecy and fear. He learned that from his dad. So we’re scared. Hiding behind layers of security. We don’t talk to each other. That’s not the way to make a scientific breakthrough. We need to share information. We need to talk to each other, brainstorm with each other. Care about one another. We could fix Pangent. Change everything about it. We could accomplish great things. But we’re scared. Scared of what we could actually do. Lottie, there’s something you wrote for the personality test. Technology. Information wants to be free. And progress belongs to the people. Companies will keep their secrets. They’ll copyright anything they can. But they’ll market it and sell it and blow it up all over the place. Well, information gets out, one way or another. Once you invent something, you can’t uninvent it. Sometimes you have to be real careful with what you put out into the world.

Pangent comic: Pipe https://pangenttechnologies.tumblr.com/post/158944279592

Original:

panel 2: NTA FJIAF EXATM QHPR YEBN NWFW Now Where could my pipe be? panel 3: MRFSAJPOJ!! Garfield panel 2: AFE JCEJB CJGIJ EJAJ JAAJ AIJA panel 3: GRONSFELD!! A1-PF on Panel 2, reverse, and group by 3’s: 109 101 100 105 097 032 053 056 1 media 58? Aha! Combine comic 2 panel 2 + comic 1 panel 3: 109 101 100 105 097 032 053 056 112 107 100 051 056 104 051 100 100 053 051 053 100 media 58pkd38h3dd535d https://mediafire.com/?58pkd38h3dd535d withourterrors.zip withourterrors.zip contains withouterrors.wav A Kansas City Standard encoded audio file. Decoding yields a text file with some Vigenere text, decoded with key 'argentinamayorsassenheim’: (ooh! a combination password)

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% C: Drinking Bird update. Thirteen months without any significant incident. Lucky. I’ll raise a glass to that. The Cube has stabilized to a degree I wouldn’t have thought possible when we began studying it at the beginning of 2017. Reluctant as I am to admit it, Leslie Walsh (aka MayorSassenheim) is responsible for most of that. She’s written code that keeps the Cube stable without real peaks and valleys, and it seems the Cube is capable of learning from that. If I trusted her, I’d leave her to her work and be done with it. I wish I could do that. The situation would be simpler. Officially, I left Project 555 a long time ago. L: you pinged me why did you ping me C: I didn’t. I was talking about you. It must have pinged you automatically L: “Drinking Bird update” jesus lottie C: What? L: you shouldn’t even be doing this who is that even an update for C: For myself. L: of course C: talking to myself thinking about myself it’s what I’m good at. L: i didn’t say that. turn your mic on i’m switching to voice. C: Over a year without any kind of disaster. Leave me alone, I’m celebrating. L: You’re lurking. In the shadows of a project you were fired from how long ago? C: I can do what I want. L: Yeah, I think that’s actually your job title at this point right? Like we don’t know what to do with Lottie and we don’t want any trouble, so I guess Lottie does what she wants. C: Leslie, I’ve been avoiding this conversation for awhile, and I’ve thought long and hard about what to say. So, here it is. Fuck off and die, Leslie, and also fuck you. L: How’s the kid? C: Beautiful. She’s the sun and the moon and the sky and the stars. She’s about six full time jobs, but Eric helps. He’s not bad at the whole father thing. L: Good. I’m glad. I’d like to see her. C: I don’t think that’s a good idea. L: I wish you’d let me be a part of your life again. C: Well, shit happens. L: What was I supposed to do? C: The four of you stole the project out from under me. L: Is that what you think happened? C: And now he’s in charge of all of it. L: Officially, he always was. None of that changed. C: You took control of my work. L: And nobody died. Nobody got hurt. Like you said, nothing happened for thirteen months. What should I have done? Leave it all to him? Dammit Lottie, I did this for you. I worked myself to death on this project, just to make sure it wouldn’t kill anybody. C: It wasn’t your responsibility. It wasn’t your burden to take on. It’s mine. L: Well, shit happens. C: This project, it drains you, it changes you. You shouldn’t have had to deal with that. It’s wrong what you did, and it’s wrong what it did to you. To both of us. L: Lottie, I did my best. Under the circumstances I tried to do what you would do. In my head it’s like I was you. C: That’s ridiculous. For one thing you’re smarter than me. L: No, I’m not. My god, I’m not. C: You are. L: This is a weird thing to say, but like … do you ever feel like you’re in the wrong timeline? Like you’re in a science fiction book about, what if the Nazis won World War II or something? Sometimes it feels like, this wasn’t supposed to happen. Like everything is wrong. C: Yes. I do feel that way sometimes. I think it’s called depression. L: Why do you hate me? C: I don’t hate you. I don’t want to hate you. We were friends and I love you. L: Lottie. C: But we can’t even be friends now and it’s bullshit. It’s him. Alex. And Liam. On their own they’d be almost harmless. The two of them together, they amplify each other’s worst qualities. L: Oh believe me, I know. Multiplying and dividing by a pair of zeroes. C: God, them and every other asshole I had to deal with and still stay halfway sane. L: Project Four. C: Project fuckin Four! Working at Pangent, it’s poison. It poisoned you and it poisoned me. Maybe I do hate you, Leslie. I hate what you did. I hate that you did it better than I could have. L: I miss you. C: Don’t be dramatic. We were only friends to get back at him. L: We were friends because we were friends. C: You know what he said to me, a couple weeks before he took control of 555? He said, I know that you and Leslie will always be friends. Didn’t sound great, coming from him. I think somewhere inside me, I made my mind up to prove him wrong. L: We could have talked this out. Dammit, we were friends. We were supposed to protect each other. C: Whatever that was, that was a moment in time, and times change. You’re stuck in a moment and you think that moment will last forever. But really a moment only comes once. L: I saw you, poking around in the code. Like the whole entire time. You weren’t super subtle about it. Were you trying to get my attention? C: Probably. Yes. L: Alex saw it too, I’m sure he did. C: I don’t care. L: I mean like I kept him from seeing the last build you did. Well, the second to last build. You should really have hidden that better. C: I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about. L: He isn’t spying on this chatroom. C: You don’t know that. You fucked me over so many times. You let him in through every backdoor. L: I let him play. Like, I let the baby have his bottle. It was gonna be a fucked up situation either way. C: That doesn’t mean I can ever feel safe again. L: I get that. I’m sorry. C: You should be. I should be. There’s a lot of sorry to go around. L: You finished it, didn’t you? 555. That was supposed to be a final build. Then you erased it. C: I stopped it before it finished uploading. L: It was a finished build. C: Compiled without errors. L: I thought so. What would happen if we ran that code? C: I don’t know. It’s gone. Deleted. Forever. L: I have the partial upload. C: Of course you do. L: I saw you uploading. I mean I started downloading the minute the transfer started. And yeah, so it cuts off at a certain point. So I found the matching point in your previous build and put two and four together. C: See, this is why I can’t trust you. L: I mean I don’t know everything you changed in that build but like I figure it was all pretty top level stuff and bug fixes, whatever was left. My copy is spliced together, but do you think it’s identical to the build you deleted? C: I don’t know. L: It compiled without errors. C: Leslie, no. Oh, I can’t breathe. L: I’ll ask you again. What would happen if we ran that code? C: I don’t know. I don’t know if I want to know. It’s dangerous. L: Of course it is. I mean that’s been the whole problem from the start. C: Yes. L: You finished the code. All of it. And then you deleted it. C: Yes. L: Are you glad I kept the data? C: Yes. God, I’m actually shaking. I hope he’s not listening to this. L: So, what do we do from here? C: I don’t know. Leslie, I’m sorry for not talking to you like a human being for so long. I didn’t know what to say and after awhile, it was just … I put it off too long. L: Not too proud of any of this myself. For reals we’ve both got a lot to pologize for. C: There’s a lot of sorry to go around. L: Yeah but like, I’d like to see you. You, with Eric, and Rachel, and Sharon too. C: Who is Sharon? %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

WTF??!!?! Wowzers.

Comic 3: Odie Pangent Version: https://pangenttechnologies.tumblr.com/post/158944845847

Original:

Randomiser transcribed/vigenered/A1-PF’d comics 3 & 4, I don’t have copies of the intermediate steps, just the finales: 640114011114754011541010018015017823795018115018019723201111231019017901123101401611230115012301111141148231218923001101811411101511101411231594234111017019911167 Comic 4: Lasagna Pangent Version: https://pangenttechnologies.tumblr.com/post/158945180237

Original:

After Vigenering ciphertext with original text, and converting A1-PF: 645111118017970171111151148236456231115013014111115011723201111231019017901123101401611230115012322101110141111167230115018117917231218923001101811411101511101411232594234111017019911167 These final strings may not look like anything, but if you reverse them and manually space them, you get 76 111 99 107 101 114 32 49 51 32 114 101 115 101 114 118 101 100 32 98 121 32 84 114 111 110 32 105 110 32 116 104 101 32 110 97 109 101 32 111 102 32 79 108 105 118 105 97 32 87 105 108 100 101 45 110 45 74 111 104 110 46 76 111 99 107 101 114 32 49 52 32 114 101 115 101 114 118 101 100 32 98 121 32 71 97 118 105 110 32 76 111 114 101 110 122 32 105 110 32 116 104 101 32 110 97 109 101 32 111 102 32 71 105 111 114 103 105 111 32 65 46 32 84 115 111 117 107 97 108 111 115 46 which is of course decimal ASCII:

Locker 13 reserved by Tron in the name of Olivia Wilde-n-John.

Locker 14 reserved by Gavin Lorenz in the name of Giorgio A. Tsoukalos.

Comic 5: Alone Pangent: https://pangenttechnologies.tumblr.com/post/158946474637

Original: (with the 'rest of the story’ to trigger your existential crisis)

GU RAT HFR EBA LQI SUI NHE RK UJ RSM OAN LNG CP HCA TNE VRE ZK OU BCI ONT IK SMO MBN ZN NEL MK KNM BQO RET PD NCO RCI OW NH RR TW FRE AWY JXD GN PO EJM HT PP NHO UQA CEN RID EJH SWA LXN HYO VC TI OD SH LEL DKR XAT PM RES FI which becomes FD AJA ABA AJA JJA HJA AAA AG BC JAA AJA DAA GI HJA GJA EJA HG BC BJA AAA BC AJA IJA GI JAA BC AJA DJA FAA BC JAA EJA BC JE ID GI CJA AJA IJA IG BC ABA HI BC JJA AJA HAA DAA AJA EAA AJA DAA BC CE ID BC DAA AJA GJA II AAA FG 64 101 121 101 001 801 111 17 23 011 101 411 79 801 701 501 87 23 201 111 23 101 901 79 011 23 101 401 611 23 011 501 23 05 94 79 301 101 901 97 23 121 89 23 001 101 811 411 101 511 101 411 23 35 94 23 411 101 701 99 111 67

Locker 15 reserved by Omega12 in the name of Niklaren Goldeye.

—– So everyone’s favorite Orange cat gave us bigtime story drops, and three locker reservations. Nice to get those on the books.

[rainydawgradioblog]

a covidsation with shelby leone

Next up is Shelby Leone, a fellow English major attending Seattle University and a stunningly talented multidisciplinary artist, writer, and musician. Last November, I was lucky enough to book their band Cherry Lip at my former DIY space, Red Room (RIP !!). Big thanks and love to Shelby for this thoughtful and insightful commentary. 

Lola Gil: Tell me about Cherry Lip and yourself. How long have y’all been playing together? Which artists are you most inspired by? How would you describe your sound?

Shelby Leone: I am a musician and writer based in Seattle. I’ve been around the scene first doing poetry readings and then playing music for three years now, and I played with Cherry Lip for a little less than a year. The sound of that project was really influenced by my bandmate Bobby’s love of Bossa and my love of sounding like a jaded nightclub singer. The band’s sound changed with our members as well, as we sort of interchanged whoever was available to play bass and keys and guitar. Sometimes it got kinda psych rock and others it was kinda Bossa indie rock.

Personally, I love Amy Winehouse, Alex Turner, Japanese Breakfast, Devendra Banhart, it’s hard to name only a few lol. 

LG: Are you planning on releasing any music soon?

SL: Yes, depending! Recording at home is awesome, but what people don’t really touch on often is how expensive some of these DIY kids’ equipment is. Between mics and software and other do-dads you see in these set ups, things can add up financially, so I’m slowly working towards finding a way to record something that is well-made from the cozy comfort of my basement. 

LG: Have you been involved in any other creative projects outside of Cherry Lip recently?

SL: I am working on a few! I’m an interdisciplinary bitch. Right now, I am working on a book of poetry, an illustrated zine (drawn by my best friend and reason for being, Quincey Caldwell), as well as some musical projects of my own :)

Recently, it has all shifted though too. Since implementing social distancing in my life, I’ve been working with recordings done by my friends and bandmates before we couldn’t go to each other’s houses and make stuff face-to-face. Everything is being done over text, and it’s not the same... but it’s not impossible to keep making things. 

LG: How have you been personally affected by COVID? What has your quarantine experience been like so far?

SL: I literally had just begun to hit my stride in the scene, playing and booking shows for the Cherry Lip project. I got really into it. I was even thinking about hosting a show to raise money for the Bernie Sanders campaign in my backyard. All in all, I had around three or four events drop, which doesn’t seem like much, but when you’re an artist who is just getting started, every opportunity to show people what you’ve worked so hard on is worth something. 

I mean house shows, venue shows, art shows, they’ve all come to a halt. In person, at least. I miss it so much, I have this big hole in my chest. I really love the community aspect of the DIY scene, even with its complications and problems. I miss seeking my weekend friends at shows, people I never saw unless we were dancing together or playing in bands on the same bill, or chatting on someone’s porch. I am lucky to live with so many people who feel the same, we’ve been filling our time trying to keep our own little creative colony connected.

LG: What music have you been listening to recently? What’s your go-to quarantine album?

SL: Jessica Pratt’s self titled release is so good for times like these. When I got laid off of my dishwashing job, I just laid on my bed and listened to it all the way through like three times. Also not to be that guy, but King Krule’s new record, Man Alive! is the kind of underwater anguish I need right now. I also just love melodrama.

LG: Are there any spring shows that you were particularly looking forward to attending that got cancelled?

SL: Ha Ha! lol...so yeah. My best friend got me tickets to see AJJ for Christmas and it was supposed to be in March... I am so sad. High school me will have to wait a tad longer to see their favorite band. 

LG: How do you think the Seattle music scene is going to shift post-COVID?

SL: Something I know in my gut is that there is more than one single scene in Seattle. It’s this living organism made of pockets of microscenes. So speaking for the limb I find myself in most often, I think we strangely needed the break. Needed a revitalization. Right now, artists are getting antsy and for a lot of them, this means new work or new motivation to get out of the house. So hopefully that means that we come back with new life. We might have the change to make something really cool here, if the world sticks around to see it. Idk maybe not. 

LG: In this funky and isolating era of social distancing, how do you think artists can support each other? How do you think social media is facilitating and/or inhibiting connection within Seattle’s creative community?

SL: I have been supporting artists as much as I can, both physically and monetarily. If you can, buy a print off of Instagram or share a Bandcamp song. Tip a cam girl, share an artist’s work on your story. It’s about staying connected to each other for more than the cloudy “need to be seen” feeling that lurks in the undertones. Right now, social media is purely social for the first time in a while, and I am grateful to be around and be an artist in an era where a complete shut down of in-person experiences does not totally stop the art form being shared.

-Lola Gil

[rockzone]

The Best Song From Every Rush Album

Rush drummer Neil Peart (pictured above) passed away last Tuesday, January 7, 2020 (aged 67). He was also the main lyricist for the band. Some time ago I read an article by Ryan Reed posted on the Ultimate Classic Rock website taking a look at the best Rush songs from every album. The full text is available at https://ultimateclassicrock.com/best-rush-songs/

I have put together these songs in a Spotify playlist (link below) as I believe that this is a true representation of some of the highlights through time of this amazing band.

Spotify Playlist - The Best Song from every Rush Album

'Rush' (1974): "Working Man"

Without this head-banging fuzz-rock anthem, Rush's debut LP would be an afterthought – a demo-worthy stepping stone to their prog destiny. But "Working Man," with its Black Sabbath-styled riffs and blue-collar lyrics, is a stone-cold classic. After a primal, two-minute pummel, they tease an ambitious streak with wild guitar solos, triplet drum fills and tempo changes, climaxing with Alex Lifeson's grandiose fanfare of string bends. Rush had only one flash of brilliance, but they harnessed its power to forge their hard-prog path.

'Fly By Night' (1975): "Fly by Night"

Bristling with energy at a compact 3:19, "Fly by Night" packs more unbridled second-by-second fun than any other song in the Rush canon. Lifeson's crunching, descending guitar riff is instant joy – the sound of, well, flying by night and changing your life – and the rhythm section's torrent of proggy fills (Geddy Lee's chorus triplets, Neil Peart's splash accents) achieve a perpetual, cinematic tension, as you wonder when and how the next surprise will emerge. (Even the bridge is built on a quality hook, with Lee singing merrily through a trippy wave of phaser – an effect achieved by running his vocal through a Leslie speaker.)

'Caress of Steel' (1975): "Bastille Day"

This song is the sound of the titular battle, the hard-rock guillotine claiming her bloody prize. Surprises aplenty: the downbeat shift at 3:55, the climactic tempo slow-down and slow-mo guitar harmonies. Lee's voice is still high and shockingly shrill, but by this point he'd learned to utilize more restraint, picking and choosing moments to shatter glass with his high trills.

'2112' (1976): "A Passage to Bangkok"

2112 is a tale of two sides: Rush saved their silliest, most long-winded ideas for the title epic and turned the second half into a catch-all hodgepodge. "A Passage to Bangkok" is one of the sharpest vocal melodies the band wrote pre-1980, and it's a load of fun as a lyric – Peart's lighthearted (lightheaded?) fable about traveling via train to Thailand in search of the world's finest reefer at each stop.

'A Farewell to Kings' (1977): "A Farewell to Kings"

The intro to A Farewell to Kings' anthemic title track signals the changes afoot: Synth and glockenspiel flutter over Alex Lifeson's gorgeously plucked, stereo-panned classical guitar, ushering in a trademark thunderous hard-rock riff. There are surprises around every turn: funky bass-led sections, rhythmic shifts, 7/8 time. Their future was limitless.

'Hemispheres' (1978): "La Villa Strangiato"

Rush subtitled this instrumental powerhouse "An Exercise in Self-Indulgence" – ironic since, by their geeky standards, it never offers a moment to yawn or check your watch. This one's full of subtle, deeply emotive playing: the rhythmic shift at 3:33, with Peart settling into a funky hi-hat pattern; Lifeson's palm-muted guitar figure; a swinging, jazzy section ("Monsters!"), mind-melting bass and solos ("The Ghost of the Aragon"). Perfection.

'Permanent Waves' (1980): "The Spirit of Radio"

There's almost a punk edge to this breakout hit, which helped Permanent Waves peak at Mo. 3 in Canada and the U.K. and No. 4 in the U.S. Another track where Geddy Lee wrote himself a quality melody that stands separate from the riff. The reggae breakdown and climactic piano stomp gave this one a commercial appeal no one could have predicted five years earlier. Peart's lyrics are about listening to Toronto radio station CFNY-FM.

'Moving Pictures' (1981): "Tom Sawyer"

"Tom Sawyer" is the ultimate Rush song in several ways. It's their most famous piece, occupying a prime piece of classic-rock radio real estate for almost four decades. It's their cleanest, most seamless fusion of prog and hard rock, boasting some of their tightest ensemble playing and a guitar riff catchier than "Smells Like Teen Spirit." Like the entirety of 1981's Moving Pictures, it's also a fascinating crossroads between '70s and '80s Rush, arriving a few years after the knotty conceptual sprawl of Hemispheres and a few years before Lee became obsessed with synthesizers. The piece originated from one of numerous jam sessions during a particularly frigid winter rehearsal at a Toronto farm; Peart, meanwhile, developed his lyrics of rebellion from a poem he received from lyricist Pye Dubois based on Mark Twain's 1876 novel The Adventures of Tom Sawyer. The result is the Rush masterpiece – a compact, four-and-a-half-minute summation of everything they represented.

'Signals' (1982): "Subdivisions"

Rush had given themselves over to synth worship, but it hadn't affected the quality of their music. "Subdivisions" is menacing prog-pop with rumbling, pitch-shifted vocals and some of the tastiest analog synth leads this side of a Stevie Wonder album. Peart contributes one of his jazziest, most complex grooves in the 7/8 section, which only makes the pattern more satisfying when he "resolves" the implied tension in 4/4. Still, Lifeson has bemoaned both the song's and album's production in the years since, specifically calling the mix for "Subdivisions" a "disappointment for me."

'Grace Under Pressure' (1984): "Kid Gloves"

Alex Lifeson wiggles to the forefront on "Kid Gloves," flipping the bird to Lee's synthesizers all the way. The guitarist's delayed, palm-muted 10/8 riff – which conjures Genesis' "Follow You Follow Me" with a proggier sensibility – is the highlight of Grace Under Pressure, offering some grit to an album that often gets lost in reverb. He sounds like he's exploding with pent-up anticipation on the guitar solo, which flaunts an Eddie Van Halen-like tremolo bar flair.

'Power Windows' (1985): "The Big Money"

Lee is one of a handful of prog musicians with the chops – and willingness – to get funky. And on this dynamo single, he smacks the crap out of his bass strings like they owe him a gambling debt. But "The Big Money" is more than just a killer groove – it's also easily one of Rush's most deceptively intricate radio hits, bouncing giddily from atmospheric synths to tribal tom-toms to arena-rock choruses. The band's early '80s sonic exploration – the brushes with reggae and ska and synth-pop – had coalesced into a color all their own.

'Hold Your Fire' (1987): "Time Stand Still"

Singer-songwriter Aimee Mann's breathy vocal adds a soothing femininity to this Top 3 hit, marking the band's first collaboration with a guest singer. "When we wrote that song, I just became obsessed with having a female vocalist come in and add a different nuance to it," Lee told A.V. Club in 2015. "We talked about a lot of different vocalists. At that time, I was a big fan of Kate Bush, and I’ve always been a big Björk fan. Somebody suggested Aimee Mann, and we listened to her work. Her voice is absolutely beautiful and really possessed a lot of the qualities that we were after, and she was thrilled to come up to Toronto and lend her talents to our song, which I think really elevated the track. She’s such an awesome person and we had a ball with her."

'Presto' (1989): "The Pass"

"All of us get lost in the darkness / Dreamers learn to steer by the stars," Lee croons on this cosmic power ballad, the single most emotional moment in the Rush catalog. It's a perfect symbiosis of music and lyric, as Lifeson's rippling guitar solidifies the poignancy in Peart's poetry about teenage suicide.

'Roll the Bones' (1991): "Bravado"

Rush go into power-ballad mode here, with Alex Lifeson's huge, ringing chords wafting over Neil Peart's jazzy drums.

'Counterparts' (1993): "Between Sun and Moon"

Counterparts marked a return to Rush relevancy – the point where songwriting caught back up to technique. Everyone's on fire here: Lee crafts one of his sharpest chorus hooks, and Neil Peart pounds out a funky tom pattern on his all-acoustic kit. (You couldn't blame the guy for experimenting with electronic drums, but a player this precise doesn't need any excuse to sound more like a machine.)

'Test for Echo' (1996): "Test for Echo"

"Test for Echo was a strange record in a sense," Lee reflected in the 2012 Rush book An Oral History, Uncensored. "It doesn’t really have a defined direction. I kind of felt like we were a bit burnt creatively. It was a creative low time for us." One rare exception to that rule is the instantly hummable title-track – a radiant blast of modernized alt-prog.

'Vapor Trails' (2002): "Vapor Trail"

Rush get full-on atmospheric with Vapor Trails' pseudo title track, another flirtation with radio-friendly alt-rock. Lifeson washes his hands of distortion, and Peart bashes a snare with a ringing, marching-band style tone.

'Snakes & Arrows' (2007): "Far Cry"

"One day I feel I'm ahead of the wheel, and the next it's rolling over me," Geddy Lee belts, preaching a universal truth. It's one of Lee's strongest choruses of the modern era.

'Clockwork Angels' (2012): "The Garden"

A rare Rush song that will leave you reaching for the Kleenex, "The Garden" stands out in the band's catalog for its sweetness and simplicity, its clarity and control. It's an unusual arrangement for these guys, with Lee crooning softly over a David Campbell string arrangement, Jason Sniderman's twinkling piano and Lifeson's restrained acoustic guitar. And its decollate quality initially concerned producer Nick Raskulinecz. "Nick was a little wary of it getting too sweet," Lifeson told MusicRadar. "The demo was very acoustic. The piano parts were there, as were the strings, but everything was kind of soft. Nick wanted us to toughen it up some." Luckily, they didn't do much toughening. If this is how the Rush story ends – and by all indications it will be – this was a poignant curtain call.

[burning-up-ao3]

20 Penguins Thoughts: The timeless art of hating your friends

JASON MACKEY Pittsburgh Post-Gazette jmackey@post-gazette.com

 NOV 12, 2019

As if playing against his former team wasn’t enough, Dominik Kahun wrestled with another reality last week as the Penguins prepared to host the Chicago Blackhawks.

On the other bench would be Dominik Kubalik, Kahun’s good friend and former linemate. Born in Czech Republic towns located less than an hour from one another, Kahun and Kubalik grew close during their time with Chicago.

Now, Kahun knew it was time to flip that proverbial switch, turning Kubalik from friend to foe.

“It’s fun,” Kahun said of the inevitable reality of sharing the same slab of ice with a good friend. “You usually don’t see them often. You always talk to them a little bit during warmup. I’m excited.”

 Matt Vensel

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 What transpired Saturday was exactly what one might expect: There was some talk during a close game, a 3-2 Penguins shootout win, and Kahun and Kubalik, without anything overly noticeable, went their separate ways, their second and final meetup this season not until March.

While playing against a good friend never lacks for fun — ask Sidney Crosby, Kris Letang, Evgeni Malkin and Marc-Andre Fleury how those meetings have gone — they usually aren’t overly physical, the opposite of former football teammates occasionally trying to exact revenge.

Well, except for that one time …

2. It was Nick Bjugstad’s first full NHL season, in 2013-14. Early November game, in Washington, and the Florida Panthers would lose in a shootout.

But it wasn’t the result that Bjugstad remembers. During one particular post-whistle scrum, Bjugstad reached for the closest Capitals player he could find and put one of the league’s more talkative defensemen into a headlock.

Turns it out it was fellow Minnesota native Nate Schmidt.

“We didn’t know it was ... each other,” Bjugstad said. “So we both kind of got each other in a headlock. Then I realized it was Nate. He realized it was me. We just kind of laughed.”

 Matt Vensel

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 Playing against good friends — Bjugstad has another in Maple Leafs defenseman Justin Holl, a fellow former Minnesota Gopher — might produce some funny moments, and these guys aren’t out to maim one another.

But Bjugstad said playing one of your buddies is hardly approached with a laissez-faire attitude.

“You want to have the bragging rights, so you don’t want to get beat in any way,” Bjugstad said. “It’s fun to get competitive.”

3. For Jake Guentzel, yet another Minnesota guy, his awkward, on-ice confrontation revolves around Brock Nelson, who’s from ... you guessed it.

Whenever the Penguins play the Islanders, things are bound to be a little more intense, with the on-ice chatter always a little more than usual.

“It was a weird time last year in the playoffs when we were going at it,” Guentzel said.

But back home in Da Beauty League, Minnesota’s terrific summer hockey outfit, any bad blood was quickly shoved aside, even if they had wanted to rip one another’s head off just a few months prior.

“It’s just a battle,” Guentzel said. “I think guys know it. It gets intense. After the game, it’s like nothing happened.”

4. There was a fun sidebar to this story that really didn’t fit anywhere else.

In the Penguins dressing room, Bjugstad and Jared McCann are almost always seated next to one another. They’re also good-natured, almost always available and great with offbeat topics such at this one.

After chatting with Bjugstad, I went next door and posed the same question to McCann, who surprisingly wasn’t much help at all.

“I don’t really have one specific story, no,” McCann said. “A lot of my buddies I grew up with don’t play hockey anymore. I’m not from Minnesota, where everybody plays hockey.”

McCann, who does a pretty good Minnesota accent, is from Stratford, Ontario, which is about two hours west of Toronto. McCann’s dad owned his own construction company and literally created a hockey rink in his backyard.

Also, it’s Canada. Can-a-da. Where hockey trails only eating, drinking and sleeping.

5. Anyway, McCann said his best friend on another team was probably James Reimer, formerly of the Florida Panthers and currently the backup in Carolina.

One small problem here, though: There’s very little trash talk that goes on between the two good friends — McCann actually stayed at Reimer’s house to watch his dog when the latter’s wife gave birth to their first child — because they like each other so much.

“Would I chirp him? No, he’s too nice,” McCann said with a laugh. “I would feel so bad if I did. He’s just such a genuinely good person. He’s never chirping or anything. He’s just an honest hockey player.”

6. Speaking of chirping, a few of the Penguins I talked to for this story flat-out stink at talking trash.

“I’m no good,” Marcus Pettersson said. “I just try to stay out of it.”

Added Bjugstad, “Usually when I start chirping, it backfires on me.”

Jack Johnson said playing a good buddy isn’t necessarily about talking trash for him. In fact, Johnson said he’s actually liable to take it a little easy on a good friend.

“You hit each other hard, but he doesn’t get the extra slash or cross-check,” Johnson said.

He also doesn’t get any phone calls or text messages, Johnson said. Both times they’ve met in the playoffs, Johnson and Penguins captain Sidney Crosby refused to talk to one another during the series.

“First time we talked was in the handshake line,” Johnson said.

7. My favorite anecdote from this story wasn’t directly related, unfortunately.

Bryan Rust was the first player I approached, knowing he and Islanders captain Anders Lee — a pair of Notre Dame products — are close.

That playoff series was especially awkward for them, although neither one runs around like an idiot. Just good, hard fun.

“In warmups you try and make eye contact,” Rust said. “You pass each other a puck and have a little bit of fun. On the ice you might say a few things to each other from bench-to-bench.

“I think everyone is pretty good at kind of drawing that fine line between having fun but still going out there and trying to win a game.”

The funny anecdote was this: Rust actually learns other languages to try and annoy players of different nationalities on the ice. Some serious respect there.

“I try and learn a few different languages to maybe say some inappropriate things to guys and catch them off-guard,” Rust said.

Caught me off-guard, too. Definitely didn’t see that one coming from Rust.

8. Moving on.

I’ve beaten this drum plenty before, and I also know it’s early. But at this rate, assuming this sort of stuff continues, I really hope Mike Sullivan gets some love for the Jack Adams Award.

This can be kind of a funky thing. Mike Babcock has never won it, and that, by itself, is absurd. But it tends to go to the guy who has helped his team author the best story or overcome the most odds. Barry Trotz with the Islanders last year was a perfect example.

Sullivan has done that this season. Almost every forward on their roster has been injured at one point or another, including Crosby, Evgeni Malkin and Patric Hornqvist. They traded Phil Kessel. Oh, and Kris Letang is hurt, too.

Coming off that playoff loss to the Islanders, Sullivan has adjusted his system to apply more puck-pressure and change how the Penguins play.

If there’s been a better coaching performance around the NHL thus far, I haven’t seen it.

9. The power play should also be factored into Sullivan’s performance this season, but I’m not sure which way to take that.

Obviously it has been terrible, but I’m also fairly confident Sullivan isn’t coaching them to over-pass, over-think or flat-out botch their breakouts. If he is, they should definitely adjust that strategy.

As Sullivan said after Saturday’s game, it’s hardly been one thing. He also admitted his guys are pressing.

Here’s a borderline insane suggestion: While Crosby is out, how about taking Alex Galchenyuk and putting him in the right circle, where he often thrived with the Coyotes?

What’s the worst that could happen, they don’t score?

10. Rust had one of the more confounding starts to a season I had ever seen in 2018-19, when he scored just one goal in his first 29 games, then exploded for a hat trick when the puck followed him all night during a 6-3 loss at Chicago on Dec. 12, 2018.

What a difference a year makes.

In an interview before the season, Penguins general manager Jim Rutherford had some interesting things to say about Rust and others who were a little too content with their success.

“Not that he played poorly, but he’s an example of a guy who I don’t think played at the level he was capable of a year ago,” Rutherford said. “That just gets to contentment. But he’s not the only guy. I’m not trying to single him out or pick on him.”

Rutherford went on to say that, “Bryan Rust was our best player at camp this year.”

After Rust was forced to hit the pause button on that when he was injured blocking a shot in the final preseason game, we’re seeing what Rutherford — and others — saw all through training camp.

11. With his third-period goal on Saturday, Rust extended his point streak to a career-high six games, where he’s scored a total of five goals. All of those since he returned from injury on Oct. 26.

“I guess things feel good,” Rust said with a smile. “I might know better than anyone else that things can turn just as quickly for the bad. I just have to keep plugging away here.”

I asked Rust to describe his approach coming into training camp and what has helped him rediscover his scoring touch.

“Just a fresh start,” Rust said. “Try to put everything in the past behind me. Obviously I felt really good through training camp. Felt great to start the year. Obviously an unfortunate injury with five minutes left in the last preseason game. Kept me out of some games there. I just kept working hard off the ice and kept wanting to play well.”

12. It’s no secret that the Penguins love Rust. Sure, he’s been big in playoffs games. Has scored a bunch of huge goals for the Penguins over the years. He has also played both wings well and has moved up and down the lineup with ease. Recently he’s been very good on Malkin’s wing.

Rust’s game — being hard on pucks and an all-around pain in the butt — has also meshed extremely well with the Penguins’ new identity.

“The biggest thing for me that Rusty has shown since Day 1 of training camp is just a sense of urgency and a certain hunger to his game,” Sullivan said. “When he plays his way, that’s when he’s at his best. I think he’s done that consistently game in and game out, day in and day out, even in practice.”

13. In that preseason interview, Rutherford also said he thought the addition of Brandon Tanev — another versatile and tenacious wing — would be good for Rust. Turns out that was probably right, too.

“We always talk with our players about being a next-effort team,” Sullivan said. “I think Rusty right now probably personifies next-effort play. He’s like a dog on a bone on the puck. He’s relentless.”

With some pretty solid scoring touch to boot.

14. Funny quote from Rust after Saturday’s win: “[Coming back from another deficit] shows a lot of character in this room, but we’re really not making it very easy on ourselves.”

The Penguins spotted their opponent three-goal leads on Monday and Thursday of last week. On Saturday, it was a 2-0 hole they had to erase.

Not exactly a recipe for success, but give the Penguins credit: They’ve found ways to win.

“We have a great group,” Sullivan said. “We’ve got good people. They’re buying in right now, and they’re playing hard for one another.

“I give our leadership a lot of credit. The guys in the room, our veteran guys, they’re leading the way there. And then some of our younger [guys] are bringing a certain level of enthusiasm.

“When you get that combination, for me, that’s a fun combination to be around. And we’ve had that a lot of this year.”

15. The impact of Malkin is absolutely noticeable.

I know it’s hardly a surprise, but similar to Rust, what happened to Malkin last season was hard to describe; at times it was like he suddenly forgot how to play hockey.

That’s in the past now.

I thought Sullivan captured this perfectly after Saturday’s game in talking about Malkin’s game, saying that they don’t want to stifle the star center’s playmaking ability, but they do need to compromise on some things.

“He’s buying in to how we’re trying to play,” Sullivan said. “He’s trying to play a more north-south game even though his instinct sometimes is to play east-west.

“We’re not trying to change Geno. That’s what makes him what he is. That’s what makes him unique. All we’re trying to do is we’re asking him to meet us halfway a little bit, and he’s done that. He’s done a great job since he’s been back.”

16. I thought Justin Schultz quietly bounced back very nicely during an eventful game Saturday night.

His ill-timed pinch, with zero support, led to the Blackhawks’ first goal. A Schultz shot attempt that never found the net inadvertently led to Chicago’s second goal.

But in overtime, Schultz made a terrific play to knock the puck away from Alex DeBrincat on a two-on-one.

It doesn’t show up on the scoresheet, but it was a huge play at the time.

17. Loved the pass by John Marino on Rust’s goal. Such poise for a young kid. Most players Marino’s age would’ve taken that shot, but he wisely took an extra second and found Rust all alone at the bottom of the left circle for a beautiful back-door goal.

“He’s just getting better with every game that he plays,” Sullivan said of Marino. “I think he’s getting more confident every game that he plays. That was a real nice play he made. Just the puck poise, the patience, the vision to see Rusty on the back side. It was just a terrific play.”

It’s pretty much impossible to think of the Penguins’ top-six on defense at this point without Marino. He has absolutely earned a regular spot in the lineup.

18. It’s noticeable that Galchenyuk is lacking confidence.

Three times in the first period Saturday, Galchenyuk had chances to put the Penguins ahead early. Three times, Galchenyuk could not beat Corey Crawford, including one nifty attempt between his legs.

Wrote about this some last week, but the Penguins need Galchenyuk to find it. It’s there, but he’s thinking entirely too much when the puck is on his stick.

19. Number of the week: Plus-12.

That’s McCann’s rating over the past five games, the best on the team. He also has two goals and six points during that stretch.

I’ll admit that I was a little surprised that Sullivan sent McCann out as his third shooter in the shootout, but McCann made his coach look smart by firing high over Crawford’s right shoulder for the shootout-deciding goal.

I’m not backing off my prediction that I think McCann will get 20 goals this season.

20. Non-hockey thought of the week:

I was saddened to learn last week the Wilson’s BBQ on the North Side burned down. Incredible place. My favorite to get BBQ in Pittsburgh. Their spicy sauce was nothing short of incredible.

I’m glad everyone is OK, but I’m also rooting for owner George Wilson Jr., hoping he’s able to build his business back up.

Pittsburgh is what it is because of awesome local businesses like Wilson’s and also Nancy B’s, where I went last week for my birthday. Another have-to-go recommendation.

Jason Mackey: jmackey@post-gazette.com and Twitter @JMackeyPG.