#aka: take responsibility before you assign blame

[redwinterroses]

...Friendly reminder: if you don't want a CC to see your stuff, it's your responsibility to block them and/or not maintag the content. They shouldn't have to operate this site any differently than any other user, and they certainly shouldn't be ordered to block some group hashtag. Curate your own experience and allow them to curate theirs.

[my-favourite-zhent]

BG3 Backstory Bash by Kelandrin

This is a challenge to help people flesh out their Tav’s backstory by exploring their past. It is organized into four sections with seven prompts. You can treat this as a monthly challenge or a general project. You can write headcanons, fics, or share art based on the prompts! You can interpret the prompts however you want. If you want to share use the tag #bg3backstorybash

I was tagged by @rolansrighthorn and @commander-krios so I'm giving this a go for Isolde aka Izzy of New Tricks. Tagging if you think this would be fun to try: @thisaccountisagainstmywill @littleplasticrat @sunites @killerpancakeburger @cloverthebarbearian

Baby:

Parents: Both humans from Phlan in Thar, north of the Moonsea. They were archaeologists and former professors of archaeology.

Birth: Izzy was born in Eleint just a few days before Highharvestide. Her parents blamed her penchant for fruit on her birthday.

First word: "up" She was a bit of a spoiled brat that liked to be carried everywhere

When they first walked: Following a bird that had been picking at the camp scraps

Tantrum: Lots of tantrums, not having anyone her age to play with meant she was a bit of a high maintenance baby.

First sickness: Since they were out on the road a lot she actually didn't catch ill till she was around six and they were visiting relatives in Phlan. She immediately caught the shaking fever but luckily fought it off after a few days.

Thunderstorm: Rather scared of them when living out of tents. Warmed up a bit after she got to stay in more permanent structures.

Childhood:

Friends: Since her family was always on the road or at various dig sites away from civilization Izzy rarely had playmates her own age. She spent most of her time reading or trying to feed any local corvids.

Siblings: Izzy is an only child.

Getting into trouble: After toddlerhood she was a generally well behaved child. She spent most of her time reading.

Birthday: In Eleint a few days before Highharvesttide.

Games: Enjoys puzzles but is unfamiliar with most children's games. Corra introduced her to darts which she quite likes.

Learning something new: Huge bookworm, loves to learn anything to do with linguistics, ancient history (especially Netheril) and cultural practices. It helps her understand people better as she has very little practical experience.

Trauma: Her parents were murdered when she was 16, though it was written off by the local authorities as an accidental fire. She is still a bit hung up on the fact that she doesn't know who the killer was and what were their motivations.

Teenager:

Growing pains: None, she never grew that much to begin with.

Taking responsibility: Growing up around almost solely adults Izzy took on responsibility as a young age, often helping out on dig sites or translation work for her parents.

Rebellion: Not at all a rebellious. Excepting the incident below.

Running away: After her parents passing she was sent to live with her aunt in the countryside for a time. However well meaning her aunt had no idea what to do with a young girl and thought trying to marry her off would solve that problem. Izzy decided to run off and go to university instead.

First love: Love is maybe a strong word, but her first crush was a boy in her aunt's village. He was very sweet but ultimately loved another girl in the village.

Adulthood:

Peer pressure: Finally among peers for the first time in university Izzy was very desperate to be accepted. She ended up copying her notes and ghostwriting assignments for a pack of shitty noble brats.

Their "first time": Was briefly in a relationship with one of the noble brats. Fairly painful first time as the guy was pretty selfish and inexperienced but she was too in love to know better.

Reckless behaviour: Devastated when she was kicked out of school and the brat pack dumped her Izzy got drunk with Corra at a festhall and slept with an adventurer who was flirting with her. He was a lot better than the noble brat.

Serious relationships: The aforementioned noble brat who dumped her when she was kicked out of school. A banite priest who was just using her for her expertise in archaelogy, ghosted as soon as he got what he wanted. Currently with Rugan the Zhent (New Tricks) we've yet to see if the pattern repeats.

Work: Since she doesn't have a proper degree she mostly uses her linguistic and archaeological expertise to aid tomb raiders with excavating ruins and smaller monasteries with translation work.

Leaving home: Izzy never really had a permanent home having grown up on the road. University was probably the closest she got to having one. She now winters with Corra in Crimor.

Aging: Early thirties but still looks good for her age, not strong but agile.

Finding their place: Still searching, her line of work and previous bad experiences make it difficult for her to form the lasting connections she so desperately wants.

Starting a family/found family: Really wants to find a life partner and a group of friends. She doesn't have any experience with children but would be willing to have them if that's what her partner wants.

[gay-trains]

Some thoughts on the symbolism of charlie’s cigarettes and Erin’s asthma.

The Cigarettes are way more than JUST Charlie’s addiction to nicotine. They are a symbol of his selfishness and how he treats people. Remember, it isn’t “I lost my cigarettes” or “I forgot my cigarettes” or “My cigarettes went missing” it is “ERIN lost my cigarettes” It is the device through which we see him shirking blame.

Charlie clearly wants to make ALL The decisions in the show but when those decisions don’t lead to success, it isn’t his fault. His cigarettes are his want to have it all, ordering people around, but not having to bear with the consequences.

That is WHY Du’met’s trap for Charlie is so genius, it isn’t JUST about the cigarettes, it is about Charlie’s selfishness and his overbearing nature the cigarettes are his neurotic need to be in control of everything that ruins the show he is trying to make.

A director’s job, is to facilitate an environment in which every single person can do their job to the best of their ability, without much or any interruption, and have it come together as a cohesive vision. I have worked with great directors before that were GREAT at this. Everyone has their instructions, everyone knows their assignment and everyone has the means to make it happen.

Charlie’s denial when Erin asks if he wants to direct movies still, is also a sign of this need to be in control. By convincing others, that what he does is important or more important than what he used to want, maybe they will believe it...and so maybe he will too. It is the same as saying “oh i didn’t want to win anyway” when you lose a game, you want to seem in control, not like you are helpless and don’t know what to do. Which Charlie is.

And his Cigarettes are his grip on that control, he is a stress smoker, clearly and the cigarettes are the symbol of that stress, the symbol of his problems, the manifestation of the very flaws that brought him into this position.

Which is WHY it is such a great moment, when he is offered a cigarette at the end and for a moment, he reaches for it....but then declines. It isn’t JUST him declining the cigarettes, it is the writers way of showing how much he has CHANGED. like the curator said, Charlie learned that being a leader is more than ordering people around, you have to see your team as equals and also let them take charge when the time is right.

Charlie’s arc is learning how capable his team is, and that he can trust them to do good if he just lets them. Instead of having his hand in every single soup. He is a director...why is he telling Mark to not get creative with the photography? Why would he tell Erin to not try out something new with the sound when she is literally responsible for that, Why is he telling KATE the expert with the Masters in  criminal psychology and investigative journalist, To not change his scripts? Kate SHOULD be the one writing her text,

Mark SHOULD get creative with photography or at the very least be allowed the opportunity to try stuff out and if it sucks then you throw it away. Erin, as the sound mixer should fucking be able to sound mix and not be his personal assistant. PA’s exist for a reason.

The stress comes from him not being able to trust them to do a good job, despite them obviously being quite capable in their fields. He needs to loosen his grip and eventually he does...he let’s go of the anxiety, aka....he quits smoking cigarettes. or at least is trying.

Just wanted to put this thought out there. Idk, it also shows just how deep the symbolism of the trap goes that du’met set for him. It is probably the deepest most dramatic, he was kind of lazy when it came to Kate, yeh sure there was the article......now what? and Mark? he didn’t rly think of much of anything special for him.

He did focus on Erin a bit more, he gave her the opportunity to be brave, offering her inhaler. fear would have been to try to attack him, bravery, was to try to grab it, and buy time enough to live. And we SEE that he respected that bravery when she made that choice, only cutting a bit of her hair and leaving.

I’m sure he to an extent sees himself in Erin a bit, or at the very least his younger self, a scared vulnurable boy, and Erin is also scared and vulnurable. his REAL trap for her was also quite personalized, with the fact it was A. a hospital...Erin is dependent on an inhaler means you gotta get perscriptions for them and have to pick them up, and asthma attacks can land you in the hospital.

She has a medical issue she lives with so her dying in a medical ward, would make sense, not to mention she is avoiding said medical issue, trying not to think about her asthma and trying to mind over matter it, but the reality is it is not giong away and the medical ward in a way is also a symbol of that.

Jamie’s texts etc, are of course also a thing in there cuz he knew about her liking Jamie I suppose, and also a symbol of her fear, because she was too afraid to make a move. and again a second time she is given the opportunity to be brave....to listen to ‘jamie’s voice in the recording and hide.....or to run, and have to face him. I do feel like if Du’met feels about ANYONE as a possible successor....I could SEE it being Erin.

You can’t mind over matter Asthma...bravery is to face the reality of what you are dealing with. and working with it in mind, not avoiding it. Admitting to yourself you cannot stop this thing from happening and are dependent on some medication or other, is a scary thing to admit to ones’ self...it is giving up a part of your illusion of control. a little like charlie. But only by facing it can you move on. and du’met almost seemed like he wanted to TEACH that to her.His traps for her felt more like tests...lessons.

In short, I think Du’met and Charlie are Erin’s gay Dads with Charlie being stressed and snappy sometimes and Du’met only needing to give the man a stern look, for him to admit he was wrong and regret whatever it is he said to their daughter and apologizing cuz he IS trying to be better.

While Du’met is the dad teaching her to stand up for herself, to be a wolf, not a sheep. And Charlie being the one to reign in Du’met when he goes too far with some of his teachings.

[laffy-taffy-creations]

Day 7 of whumptober!

This fic was cross-posted on AO3 here

Venomous Relations

Alleyway | Radio Silence | "Can you hear me?"

Fandom: My Hero Academia

Words: 731

Warnings: poisoning, paralysis, panic, aka the trifecta of pain. Also self-blaming

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I hated this. I hated going behind my friends' backs, but I had to.

If we had any hope of taking down the LOV, gods know that working from the inside-out would absolutely help.

"Venom, there you are."

My illusory disguise looked nothing like real me. It helped that this was not my first time doing this. "Hey boss, whaddya need~?"

"A special poison. Transfers through the bloodstream and wounds. Paralyzes the victim for however long you can make it. No antidote."

I nodded.

I'm definitely making an antidote.

"This is for Toga's weapons, right~?" I sing-songed in the fake voice.

AFO nodded.

"Mkay~, I'll be about a week, maybe two maximum. Name your price as always and it's done All for Nothing."

"How many times have I told you to not call me that."

"I don't really see much stopping me~."

"Look I'm offering 2 and a quarter million for the job, just get it done okay?" (Author's note: ¥2.5M is a little over 15k USD)

"Sounds fair to me. See you soon~," I told him before skipping back the way I came.

I almost threw up once I got back to my dorm about the prospect of my own poisons being used to paralyze my classmates, my friends.

That's why we're also making an antidote, calm down Clo…

I started work on the poison. Slowly but surely, I made progress on the paralysis poison- and its antidote. I would not let them have the upper hand just because they were hiring me whether or not they knew I was a student here.

There were a few questions on what exactly I was doing, but those were few and far between, I made sure people stayed out of my room most of the time. Whether I be working on tech or some sort of poison or putting together the pieces of the goings on in the criminal underground, it was generally unsafe for people to be in my room most of the time.

I finally finished the poison, delivered it, and got my money. Gods above if I weren't doing this for my friends I would quit right now or be 'fired' due to attacking him.

Thankfully, I didn't need to make them for him very often.

----《 ¤ 》----

"Hey Vee! We got a mission!" Izu told me. I didn't think anything of it at the time. It just seemed like a simple mission they were sending us on.

----《 ¤ 》----

"Hey, just checking in," I said into my comms. No response. "Uhhh, Deku?"

Nothing.

"Deku, can you hear me?"

Still absolutely nothing. My heart started racing and so did my legs, running through our assigned area, searching.

He was in an alley. Toga was right by him. He was paralyzed with my own fucking poison.

This is my fault. I made the poison. I gave it to the LOV. I paralyzed him.

"GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM HIM!" I shouted at her.

She turned just in time to get hit directly with my punch. She attempted to stab me, use my own damn poison against me, but I was way to quick for that. During one strike I grabbed her arm and slammed her into the pavement below me using momentum.

"This is Blackout, requesting backup. One villain and my partner likely needs a medic."

I kept a foot firmly planted on Toga's back while I searched through my Limbo for an antidote.

"Found you~," I whispered to myself, grabbing the needle. I temporarily left Toga and kneeled down next to Izuku.

"Can you hear me? Blink twice if yes," I said, praying that it only hijacked his ability to move his limbs as intended. My poisons always worked as intended, but I could never be too careful.

Two blinks.

"Okay, I'm gonna inject this, and it's gonna fix what she did to you in about 5 minutes, tops okay?"

Two more blinks.

"Where the fuck did you get that?" I heard Toga say. She watched in amazement as Izuku regained control of his body, effectively removing all effects of the poison.

I heard the footsteps of the backup I called for. I stared her down, "you can't use my own damn venom against me."

I hoisted Izu up under one of my arms to help keep him stable and walked away, refusing to answer any questions from him or the LOV.

[tpwkjerii]

fool’s mate

there’s only one way to lose a game of chess in two moves, and hwang hyunjin managed to figure out how to (subtly) steal your heart with exactly two moves.

pairing: student!hyunjin x student!reader

warnings: fluff, some cursing, y/n likes reading & books, y/n is kinda a teachers pet, y/n is kinda mean, hyunjin is a simp

genre: high school au, fluff, minor angst if you squint, kinda enemies to lovers and fools to lovers

word count: 4.1k+

a/n: first hyunjin fanfic pls enjoy loves!! also a big happy birthday to hyunjin! send him some love if you can :’) xx

Hwang Hyunjin was an asshole. Or at least he was in your eyes.

Why he decided to bother you every morning without fail? You didn’t know. Usually, you brushed it off in favor of talking to your friend Mina, but this morning you couldn’t. Why?

His clumsy ass spilled warm coffee on your white uniform blouse. Now you were sure he didn’t mean to do it on purpose since he never resorted to any physical annoyance, but after the morning you had (let’s just say you shared some rather unsavory words with your project group members), you could only place the harsh blame on him.

You cursed at the same time he apologized, shooting up from your seat with dark brown coffee dripping down your shirt and onto the table.

“I’m so sorry! Really! Sorry!” Hyunjin said frantically, his hands desperately grabbing onto napkins and awkwardly pressing them onto your chest as a futile attempt to pat away the mess.

“Really? You’re sorry?” you huffed, extremely agitated. To make matters worse, everyone was watching your interaction with Hyunjin, and they were all laughing.

Who were they to laugh at your misery? Even Mina was stifling a laugh! Your friend Mina!

“I meant to give the coffee to you and I tripped over your bag! I didn’t see it I swear!” Hyunjin explained, although it did nothing to calm you down. He faltered over his words when his fingers accidentally brushed against the exposed part of your chest, and you ignored the way it made your heart skip, instead choosing to verbally attack him again.

“You expect me to believe that, Hyunjin?” you exhorted dryly, watching as his long black hair shook rapidly while he nodded.

“Yes because it’s true!” he cried, shrivelling inside when you only scoffed and pushed him away.

Your teacher coughed awkwardly once Hyunjin returned to his seat, gathering everyone’s attention. Well, everyone except Hyunjin, who was staring at you like a kicked puppy.

“___, why don’t you take a trip to the nurse’s office, I’m sure she has an extra shirt for you,” your teacher instructed you, sympathy evident in her voice.

Your face burned red as you nodded and stood up, hating the way everyone looked at you and your coffee soaked shirt. Damn Hwang Hyunjin. You all but ran out of the classroom, and left just as Han Jisung leaned over to Hyunjin and said, “I told you she wouldn’t like the coffee.”

Thankfully, you ended up getting a new (and clean) shirt from the nurse, and you were in a much better mood once lunch hour arrived. Everything was going well as you walked out into the courtyard with Mina. You had your lunch in one hand and drink in the other, ready to replenish yourself after long hours of boring class. In the moment, you thought that the worst of your day was truly over.

But, of course, you were a fool to think that you could ever have a truly good day.

Hyunjin and his group of friends walked up to you, their own drinks and foods in hand. Instinctively, you put a hand up, saying as he approached, “If you’re thinking about spilling another drink on me, don’t.”

At your snarky comment, Hyunjin winced and his shoulders visibly sunk. The sight was so sad it almost made you feel bad for him. Almost.

“It was an accident! It really was!” Hyunjin defended himself weakly, obviously ready to continue but stopped when one of his friends - Seungmin, you recognized - cleared his throat and elbowed him. With Seungmin’s interruption, Hyunjin remembered why he approached you in the first place, and his entire demeanor shifted. His shoulders lifted, chest popped out, and an effortlessly beautiful smile took over his face.

Looking unimpressed, you gestured at him to continue. “I don’t have all day, Hyunjin.”

He nodded, and confidently asked, “___, how do you feel about accompanying me to Yellow Wood Cafe after school?”

You furrowed your brows at his proposition and stifled a laugh at the way his friends reacted to his request. If you looked closely, you could see Felix mutter “that’s not how we practiced.”

“As much as I would love to go and get another coffee spilled on me,” you started dryly, and Hyunjn visibly deflated as he realized you would never let that go, “I have Book Club after school.”

At that, Hyunjin’s face contorted into one of confusion. He swore he double - no he triple checked that you would be able to go today. According to the club website and a trusted source, Book Club wasn't supposed to meet again until next week.

“I thought we weren’t going to meet until next week?” Seungmin asked, thankfully voicing Hyunjin’s concerns. Although it wasn’t because Seungmin could read Hyunjin’s mind, but because Seungmin (aka trusted source) was also in Book Club.

You nodded at Seungmin, and Hyunjin ignored the jealousy he felt when you smiled at his friend, informing him of the board meeting that the club was having.

Hyunjin slapped himself internally. He forgot you were the vice president of Book Club. How could he forget such a crucial detail?

Seungmin nodded in response, and you took the newfound and rather awkward silence among the group as the chance to leave. “Sorry, Hyunjin. I won’t be able to make it today,” you said with a twinge of actual sympathy.

Once you were gone, Hyunjin sadly walked away, his friends in tow. As they sat down at their usual table, a light bulb emerged and lit up in Hyunjin’s mind. He had a plan.

“Seungmin,” Hyunjin started, effectively capturing his friend’s attention, “you play chess, right?”

Seungmin nodded, sarcastically stating, “I’ve only been in Chess Club for two years.”

Hyunjin grinned, “I know I know. Anyways, what’s that one thing called? The one where you can win a game of chess in only two moves?”

“Fool’s mate?”

“Yes!” Hyunjin exclaimed, now having the attention of his entire table (and directly surrounding ones). “I know how to woo Y/N with only two moves.”

“Who uses the word woo anymore?” Jeongin said, his face scrunched into a grimace. “And how exactly do you plan on doing that when she hates you?”

Hyunjin frowned at his younger friend. “She doesn’t hate me. And it’ll be simple, just listen…”

Move 1: King’s Pawn to E5 — Avoid Y/N (“absence makes the heart grow fonder or some shit like that, right?” - jisung someone)

Expected Response: Y/N will start to realize that she actually likes Hyunjin and his presence.

4 days.

It had been 4 days since Hyunjin last talked to you. Were these arguably the best 4 days of your life? Absolutely.

No coffee spills. No obnoxious locker slamming (yes, Hyunjin had the locker next to yours). No yelling across the classroom. Just pure, unadulterated peace.

But you couldn’t shake the feeling that you were missing something. Did you know what that certain something was? Yes. Did you want to admit it? Fuck no. There was no way you actually missed Hyunjin’s presence, no way.

As you walked into the classroom again, your eyes reflexively darted to the corner where Hyunjin and his friends always sat. As usual, Hyunjin was sitting on the table with Felix at his side, Jisung and Seungmin were sitting in their seats, and Jeongin was leaning against Seungmin’s shoulder. Normally, Hyunjin would see you enter, shout your name, and gesture for you to sit by him.

However, it’s been nearly a week since the last time he did that. The first day, it was a relief to not have the entire room’s attention on you at 7:50 AM. Now, it was slightly irking.

For a split second, as you walked to your seat, you made eye contact with Hyunjin; and for a second, you thought everything was about to return to normal. But instead of calling you out like you thought, he looked completely past you and waved at the person behind you.

It took almost all of your control to maintain a neutral expression and not turn around to see just who that person was.

Begrudgingly, you set your school bag down on your table and sat down in your assigned seat. With two minutes before the bell, Jeongin runs out of your classroom to go to his and Mina walks in to take her seat next to you.

“What’s got you so upset?” she asked, faux innocence laced in her voice and a knowing look in her eyes. Mina caught on easily two days ago when you accidentally let slip a hurt expression when Hyunjin ignored your greeting.

“Shut up,” you muttered, hearing her stifled laugh as you took out your notebooks.

Luckily, your first few classes passed by rather quickly. For once, your groupmates actually contributed and spared you the trouble of doing all the work. Soon enough, it was lunch period, and you and Mina found yourselves walking to your usual lunch spot.

As you approached your unofficially-claimed bench in the courtyard, you eyed Hyunjin’s unusually quiet table. On a normal day, they would all be very loud (at this point, everyone knew what Jeongin’s scream sounded), but today they were hunched over the table in what appeared to be a deep discussion.

With this newfound silence, you could actually hear the wind rustling the trees and the light chirps of the birds. It was relaxing and peaceful, exactly as you thought lunch should be. For a second, you let a smile grace your face and forgot about how you missed Hyunjin’s constant annoying presence.

Of course, good things can never last long for you because soon enough, it was too relaxing. The birds’ light chirps became annoyingly loud and the blowing wind just became an inconvenience as your hair kept flying into your face regardless of how you angled yourself. And then, as if the clouds opened up and shined a ray of the heavens onto the planet, you heard his laugh.

The laugh, which you previously associated with pure anger, filled you with a surprising warmth. Any negative words you had for mother nature fell silent on your tongue as you shifted your gaze to look at Hyunjin. You watched as he tilted his head back, a harmonious laugh erupting from his throat as his eyes crinkled into beautiful half moons.

You found yourself hypnotized by him as he calmed down and leaned back, running his hands through his long, black hair with a content expression on his attractive face...

You stiffened as he turned and met your gaze. Hoping that he didn’t see the intense blush on your face (he totally did), you quickly looked away and grabbed Mina’s arm, effectively startling her.

“Wh-what are you doing?” Mina asked, slightly choking on her lunch as you rushed her to stand up. “You didn’t even touch your food!” the disgruntled girl continued as you dragged her away.

“I-it doesn’t matter,” you stuttered, praying for the heat across your face to go away. “I’ve lost my appetite.”

“Well I haven’t,” Mina muttered.

“Mina,” you started, whirling around to stop both of you in your tracks once you were out of the courtyard and in an empty hallway. She looked at you expectantly, her feet tapping impatiently. “This is an emergency,” you stressed.

Mina looked both unimpressed and concerned. With raised eyebrows, she asked, “Emergency meaning what, exactly? Do you need me to take you to the nurse?”

You groaned and looked down at your feet in embarrassment. Raising your hands to your face, you sighed as you mumbled, “I… I think I like Hyunjin.”

Pretending that she couldn’t hear you and deciding to make you more miserable than you already were, Mina held back her laugh and said, “You what? I didn’t quite hear that.”

Suppressing a loud groan, you begrudgingly repeated, “I think I like Hyunjin,” a hard annunciation following each word.

“Ah,” Mina laughed. “I thought so. We all did.”

You shot up, making direct eye contact with the girl in front of you. “What do you mean?” you asked, your eyes narrowed in suspicion.

Mina laughed again, saying, “You know, you’re pretty blind sometimes.” With that, she started walking away, only picking up her pace when you started following after her.

“What’s that even supposed to mean?” you shouted after her, groaning internally as she broke into a full on sprint.

Move 2: Queen to H4 — Invade Indirectly spend more time with Y/N by attending the same activities (“but hyunjin you hate readi - ” “shut up jeongin”)

Expected Response: Y/N will realize that she loves doing stuff with Hyunjin and will like him more.

“You joined Book Club?” you asked the long-haired newcomer, trying to control the shakiness in your voice and thanking god that you were sitting or else your weak knees would betray you.

Hyunjin nodded, a beautiful smile spreading across his face. “Seungmin,” he paused, pointing to Seungmin, who waved from the door, “suggested that I pick up a new extracurricular.”

You raised your eyebrow pointedly. “And you chose Book Club?”

He nodded proudly, hoping that he didn’t appear as nervous as he felt inside.

“Hyunjin,” you sighed, and he ignored how the way you said his name made his heart feel like it was about to collapse after a marathon, “the only books I have ever seen you read were all for class.”

“And they were all great!” he lied through his teeth, but painted on fake enthusiasm in hopes of convincing you. Evidently, it worked as your confused gaze dropped and you shrugged.

“If Seungmin thinks you’ll enjoy it then I guess you’re free to join us today,” you told him, your voice soft and lacking the usual bite it had when you talked to Hyunjin. Your gentle tone shocked everyone in the room, who all expected you to kick Hyunjin out instantly and permanently ban him from the back library office the club met in once every two weeks.

“Oh,” he said, his lips parting in shock and his heart pounding wildly as you gestured for him to take the empty seat next to Seungmin. “Thank you,” Hyunjin managed to breathe out, turning around to walk towards the open seat with a hand dramatically clenched over his chest.

“Alright,” the sound of your voice again startled Hyunjin, who barely sat down. You stood up from your seat, a book in hand and a friendly smile on your face. “Hopefully everyone finished the last book, which was recommended by Sunwoo,” you announced, smiling as you lifted up the book 1984 and gestured kindly towards Sunwoo, a boy in your class.

Hyunjin ignored the twinge of jealousy as you nonverbally praised Sunwoo for his book choice. He could choose nice books to read, too.

“Usually Joon leads the discussion,” you continued, and Hyunjin recognized the advanced Literature TA’s name, “but seeing as both him and Haechan aren’t here, I’ll be leading the discussion for today!”

Hyunjin felt his heart swell at the proud grin on your face as you talked about your passions. To be honest, he hated reading and would prefer to be at the dance studio with Felix for extra practice, but being here with you made him quickly forget about those two things. He would read 1000 books if it meant he got to spend more time with you.

In the front, you animatedly led the discussion, willing yourself to not stare at Hyunjin and lose your train of thought. It was harder than you thought it would be to ignore the way he casually ran his hands through his hair and how he pushed up the sleeves of his uniform shirt. It was enough to make you both curse and thank Seungmin for bringing him today.

After ten long minutes of discretely ogling Hyunjin while attempting to lead the discussion on a book you barely managed to finish in time, you were finally able to sit down. Everyone else was deep in conversation, and mostly everyone had their attention off you. Key word: most.

Hyunjin kept an unreadable gaze on you while, shockingly, participating in the group discussion. Your eyes clashed with his, and you found yourself struggling to breathe properly as he mentioned his favorite part of the book.

“When Winston and Julia realized they liked each other and took the risk to be together.”

At his words, your breath stopped. The intense gaze he held on you and the slight shakiness in his voice led you to assume that Hyunjin was feeling the same way as you, and that his sentence was just a shove — a way of indirectly putting his feelings into the air. You knew that your relationship wouldn’t be nearly as risky as the two characters’ of 1984 and that you and Hyunjin were far from the two, but somehow, Hyunjin’s words managed to excite you.

Was it a risk to open your heart up to the person who used to annoy you to no end? Was it a risk to like someone at all? Years of building walls and pushing people away were crumbled by a beautiful boy with a smile that took your breath away. You didn’t know what this meant for you, but one thing was for sure: for once, you hoped that Hyunjin didn’t stop hanging around.

Soon enough, Book Club was over, and you all but ran out of the library. With your backpack securely on, you put in your earphones and began the usual walk to Yellow Wood Cafe. It was a usual tradition to meet Mina, who was really your only friend now that you were thinking about it, after Book Club to do homework and eat together.

With music playing loudly in your ears, you failed to notice Hyunjin and Seungmin behind you; conveniently, both of them were also headed to the Cafe to visit their friend who worked there. Or, at least Seungmin was — Hyunjin had an ulterior motive.

After a short eight minute walk, which was all taken up with you screaming internally over your newfound feelings for Hyunjin, you arrived at the bright storefront. Through the decorated glass walls, you saw Mina sitting at your usual table, her neck craned down to copy notes. You walked into the store with a happy smile and headed straight for the empty seat across your friend.

As you set your bag down, Mina looked up, and her smile turned into a mischievous grin when she moved slightly to the side to see the familiar faces that entered behind you.

“What are you looking at?” you asked, your brows furrowed together as you turned around.

You recognized him instantly and you quickly whipped around, hoping he didn’t see that (he definitely did). “Oh my god,” you whispered, your eyes wide in panic, “I can’t believe he followed me.”

“Follow?”

You inhaled sharply, hesitantly turning around and gasping when you saw how close Hyunjin was standing to you. His head was craned down to look at you, and there was barely a foot between your faces.

“___, I didn’t follow you. My friend works here and I wanted to pay him a visit,” he told you, waving to the guy behind the counter as his evidence.

“Oh,” you dumbly responded, your voice uncharacteristically shaky. “Well, I take my words back.” You subtly cleared your throat and turned back around, hoping your face didn’t appear as warm as it felt.

Hyunjin cleared his throat, causing you to stiffen slightly, and asked, “Want a drink? My treat.”

“N-no thanks,” you managed to reply, internally cursing at the stutter. How did Hyunjin somehow manage to completely dissolve your composure?

You didn’t even get to think about the answer to your question as Hyunjin said, “I insist. You usually get a Jasmine Green Tea with boba, right?”

“How do you know my or -”

“Hey Changbin, can I get a Jasmine Green Tea with boba and a Brown Sugar Milk Tea with boba?”

You watched as Hyunjin inserted his card into the chip reader and took it out, the receipt proof that he really did get you a drink.

“Er - thanks,” you mumbled as he approached, feeling incredibly awkward. By now, Mina had moved to talk to Seungmin since they shared the same math class, but you didn’t miss the way they eyed you and Hyunjin.

If any of your awkwardness was showing, Hyunjin chose to ignore it as he seemed as cool as ever. “No problem,” he said, his hands moving together to clasp each other tightly. “Since I got you a drink,” he started, his voice wavering slightly, “I was wondering if we could talk? Just for a few moments?”

Your eyes widened and you felt your heart pick up its pace. “Just us two?” you asked, your voice mirroring your shock.

With his nod, you slowly walked towards an empty table with him and awkwardly sat down at one of the sides. You kept your gaze firmly on the white table in fear of looking up and losing what was left of your composure. Silence prevailed for a few seconds until Hyunjin spoke.

“I know that we haven’t been on the best terms the past year,” he started, and you nodded at his true statement. “I did a lot of things that I didn’t realize really bothered you -” you thought back to the amount of times he would purposely distract you in class and randomly hug you when he was sweaty from dance or swim practice.

“- but I really did those things you get your attention,” he paused, causing you to look up just as he looked down bashfully, “which didn’t work out too well when I really thought about it. And I know that now you probably think I’m annoying -” your breath hitched and you stopped yourself from blurting out ‘not anymore’ “- but I still want to let you know how I feel.”

He looked up, and the genuineness in his eyes made your heart feel like it was going to beat out of your chest. “I…” he weakly started, “I don’t know if anything changed how you felt this week but I know that I’ve liked you since you stood up for me last year.”

Right, you thought back to the time when you and Hyunjin were mere classmates (basically strangers) and you defended him from an older student. You couldn’t stand to see them abuse their authority as your elder (by only one year too), and decided to use your influence as a teacher’s pet to teach him a lesson. It was safe to say that Hyunjin was never bothered after that.

“After that I just wanted to be around you more,” Hyunjin continued, “but you usually kept your distance from people and I was stupid and couldn’t think of better ways to get your attention than annoy you.” The long-haired boy in front of you was blushing now, and his hands were clasped together so tightly you had to fight the urge to reach out with your own and relax him.

“I understand if you don’t feel the same, but I’d really appreciate it if you gave me the chance and allowed me to take you out on a date -”

“Yes,” you said instantly. But Hyunjin, amidst the panic of his mind, seemed to hear something else as his face immediately fell and he instantly moved to stand up.

“I guess I expected that - wait, yes?” He plopped back down on his seat ungracefully, shock absorbing his features as if a light had turned on in his brain and properly registered what you said.

You nodded, a bright red blush staining your cheeks. “Yes, you can take me out on a date, Hyunjin.”

“Is this a dream?” Hyunjin asked, the shock still clear on his face as he held back an excited smile.

You shook your head with a small laugh. “Nope, completely real life, I’m afraid,” you answered, gently pinching his hand for extra emphasis.

Hyunjin broke into a large grin and moved to cover your hands with his own. “I’ve dreamed about this moment,” he shyly admitted with a bashful blush that slowly spread across his face, “and I didn’t think you’d ever say yes.”

You took a second to admire his smile and how his eyes seemed to shine even in the cafe’s fluorescent lighting. Hyunjin really did have the most beautiful smile you had ever seen.

“I’m curious,” you started slowly after collecting yourself. He nodded, a silent gesture to continue. “Was this a plan? The past week, it felt different, and that’s how I started to realize…” you paused, a blush spreading across your face, “I liked you.”

Hyunjin’s smile never faltered, and he tightened his grip around your hands as he asked, “have you ever played chess?”

[winryofresembool]

Things We Lost in the Fire, ch 38

aka Caleo uni au

Fic summary: Calypso starts studying at a new university, but to her annoyance her new flatmate is a loud mouthed mechanic who also likes to sneak his dog in whenever. But as she learns to know him better, she realizes they might have more in common than what she first thought. Eventually, even the darkest secrets come out…

Chapter summary: A new semester is starting

A/N: We are finally done with the holiday chapters! When it comes to this chapter, I'd like to state that I only have some experience from a couple of Finnish universities so I really don't know a whole lot about how certain things work in practice in the States, so please ignore the possible inaccuracies for the sake of this fic. It feels weird after a couple of 'bigger' chapters to have a bit more 'fillery' one... but... but... there's Caleo in the beginning?? So I hope you'll enjoy nevertheless. I wish I could spread even more love towards this ship because they deserve it but sadly there are only so few hours in a day. The fandom seems so quiet these days...

Anyway, enough rambling! Now let's get to this chapter, and the usual reminder: I love to hear what you think! All comments are much appreciated :)

Words: 2500+ 

Genre: romance & hurt/comfort

Warnings: none

previous chapter / AO3

...

”Is something the matter? You look quite unhappy.”

Leo felt arms sneak around his shoulders from behind while he was sitting on the common area sofa, staring at his laptop with a frown. Some of the speaker’s reddish brown hair fell in front of his face, the smell of cinnamon drifting into his nose, and for some reason that alone was enough to relieve some of Leo’s uneasiness. The small, pale hands found their way down his biceps and stopped there, but he wasn’t going to complain. If he was honest, he was really happy about Calypso’s growing confidence when it came to the physical affection, because it told him she really trusted him. Sometimes he was still amazed that he out of all the people had managed to break the ice around her.

Before Leo let himself get too lovestruck, though, he reminded himself why he was staring at his laptop in the first place. The new semester was starting and that naturally meant new courses, new assignments, new texts to read and… new emails from his professors. One specific email had managed to twist his stomach quite badly. In it, the professor from his chemistry lab class had asked him for a meeting, and Leo assumed he wanted to discuss what had happened on the exam day. Wishing that he could just ignore that said message, he turned his attention back to his girlfriend.

“Just uni issues… nothing more severe this time,” Leo replied half jokingly. The holidays had given him some perspective on what really was important to him and failing a class didn’t feel quite as big an issue anymore. It was inconvenient, yes, on a few levels, but not entirely unfixable.

“Oh?” Calypso finally let her hands slide off of him and sat down next to him. She seemed a bit relieved that this was about the university and not something that was out of her reach, and if Leo was honest, he couldn’t blame her. “What kind of issues?”

“A professor wants to meet me face to face tomorrow. Probably to talk about my recent chemistry lab test or something like that.” He shrugged nonchalantly.

“Hmm… Isn’t it quite unusual for them to give special focus to a single student at this stage?” Calypso asked.

“Apparently they still do that in my department. Who knows, maybe they think I’ve caused them enough trouble by now and want me to quit.”

“But what happened in your lab test was not your fault. Do you think you are any closer to being able to finish it in case you get another chance?”

When Calypso was looking at him with those almost chocolate brown eyes, he felt that it wasn’t impossible.

“Some smart person once said that I need to believe in myself more, so that’s what I need to learn to do. After that… it might be possible.”

“I’m glad you’re listening to me at least sometimes.” Calypso gave him a lopsided smile. “The fact that you know what you should do means that you’re already on your way there.”

“Yeah. I guess so.” Wanting to talk about something else, Leo asked: “Well, what about you? How are you feeling about the upcoming semester?”

“I’m feeling… pretty good about it, you know? Sure, I’ve been reading our course plans and it sounds like our professors are planning to make us work like every day is an exam day and we have some group assignments and important presentations coming up, but… I really like learning? And I like listening to the conversations between our professors and my fellow students during our lectures because it’s something I never got to do when I was stuck at home… I feel like I get new points of views from them all the time. And Annabeth is a really big help; she knows everything about everything so if I ever feel like I can’t follow the lectures, she can always clarify them to me.”

“I have a hard time imagining you not being able to keep up with the professors… but yeah, it’s good you can ask for her help if needed.”

Calypso nodded.

“You know, I’m glad you two got your issues sorted out in the fall,” Leo added as an afterthought.

Calypso looked up at him with a slight frown as if she had completely forgotten about what exactly had happened in the fall. “Oh, right, that. I feel like it was just one big misunderstanding. Both of us realized that we can’t get stuck on something that happened so long ago.”

Leo couldn’t deny that he had also felt a bit jealous of Percy when he had first found out about his and Calypso’s past, but she had clearly moved on, so he wasn’t holding a grudge anymore either. Calypso had decided to date him, and that’s what mattered.

“Yeah, I know from my personal experiences that ain’t worth it,” he replied.

Calypso leaned her head against his shoulder and sighed.

“I have a… maybe a bit weird question. Do you believe in some kind of greater power? You know, like gods?”

Leo wondered why she would ask that. “I dunno. Maybe. I’m not really strongly for or against that. I think I’m the kind of person who needs to see it to believe it, but I don’t think it’s impossible. But why do you ask?”

“This will sound extremely cheesy but sometimes I wonder… if there was a reason why we two met. Like some greater power that pushed us together for some reason.”

“Wow. I don’t know if any greater powers had their fingers in that but I am glad that it happened.” Leo threw his arm around her shoulder and wondered briefly why it felt like such a natural thing to do. At one point he had been too intimidated to initiate any kind of physical contact but now that they were more open with each other and she had seen him in some of his worse moments – he didn’t mind anymore.

“Yeah. Me too.” Calypso whispered.

Only the buzzing of the fridge and some other kitchen machinery could be heard on the background while the flatmates were simply enjoying each other’s company, resting their heads against each other, but eventually Calypso suggested:

“Hey... I think I need something that will allow me to disconnect a bit, so… how about some Friends?”

Leo didn’t have anything against that suggestion. In fact, he always enjoyed the TV show or movie nights with Calypso, for various reasons. “Sure. That sounds great to me. You know I’m always ready to roast my homeboy Chandler.”

“I know you are.” Calypso nudged him and took the remote control to find the right episode. As they started watching and commenting on it (he always enjoyed how snarky Calypso’s comments could be), Leo almost forgot about the upcoming meeting with the professor.

…

The next day, Leo found himself in the building where the office of his lab professor was located. At the breakfast table he had practiced the meeting with Calypso, and Jason had also joined him a bit later to wish him luck. To Leo’s relief, he did seem a lot happier than when he had seen him before the holiday break, but he still didn’t talk a whole lot about his current situation. Leo himself decided that it was better if he didn’t guide his friends too much so instead he did a quick recap on the recent developments in his own life – without mentioning his new relationship status. Luckily Jason didn’t ask, as he seemed to be more worried about Leo’s upcoming meeting.

As he was waiting for the professor to arrive, Leo kept glancing at his clock nervously. The man was already a few minutes late. While Leo knew that wasn’t anything unusual in the university world, as the professors tended to be busy, he still kept wishing he could get the meeting over with as soon as possible. His leg started bouncing again on its own and his fingers were tapping against the wooden handle of the chair. Suddenly he didn’t feel quite as sure about what he was going to tell the professor as he had felt earlier.

Finally, he was pulled from his thoughts by a loud ‘ahem’.

“Mr. Valdez? Sorry I’m late, my meeting with a couple of coworkers got a bit long,” the professor said.

“That’s… that’s fine,” Leo stuttered. Some months ago he would probably have said something snarky as a response but right now he knew better than to take any risks.

“Go in, go in, so we can have a talk,” the professor encouraged. Unwillingly, Leo followed him into his office and had to be told to sit down before he even realized that there was a comfortable looking arm chair right next to him.

“So…” the professor started once he was seated behind his desk. “You probably know why I invited you here.”

“I… I do have an idea…” Leo said hesitantly, looking everywhere in the room except the professor. The man had a lot of engineering related books in his bookshelf, a big stack of papers - probably students’ assignments - and a fancy looking calculator on his desk. Behind him on the wall there was a single photograph of his family. Pretty much exactly how Leo had imagined the said professor’s room looking.

“I will be direct with you. Your achievements in the lab classes - or lack thereof - is a cause of confusion for us. In almost all of the theory related classes, you are on the top of the class – despite the occasional reports that your behavior towards the lecturers could use some improvement.” The man raised his eyebrow, but Leo thought he could see a glint of amusement in his eyes. That didn’t last long, though. “However, until now we have been willing to overlook that because of your talents. Maths, physics, chemistry… those things you clearly don’t have any issues with. But already for the second year you have been avoiding the lab classes for which you have been signed up and last fall you even left the chemistry lab test before you managed to get it completed. I’m sure you are aware that if you want to move onto the more advanced classes, you need to complete the mandatory ones before you are allowed to do that.”

“Yes, sir, I’m aware of that,” Leo replied stiffly, wondering briefly when was the last time he had called anyone sir, other than ironically.

“In that case…” His voice turned less formal, more fatherly as he continued, which surprised Leo. The professors he was used to dealing with were usually not all too nice to him, although he was willing to admit that some of it was probably deserved. “Can I ask you, is there a specific reason why you haven’t attended the lab classes?”

Leo wondered if he should come up with a quick lie. It wouldn’t be the first time in his life that he would have to do that in order to protect himself. However, the professor really seemed sincere and concerned about him and in a way his expression reminded him of Jo’s when she was expecting him to open up. Perhaps that’s why he ended up deciding to answer honestly:

“Yes. There is.”

“And? What is the reason?” The professor raised his eyebrow.

Leo inhaled deeply before forming his response. “I’m afraid of fire. Yeah, laugh ahead, but it’s true. I can’t deal with anything that requires heating because of some nasty as hell childhood trauma.”

To his surprise, the professor didn’t get angry at him for talking to him in such a manner. Instead, he furrowed his eyebrows.

“And you’re still planning to make mechanical engineering your career? Despite your fear?”

Leo nodded slowly. “Yeah. Building and fixing inanimate objects is the only thing I’ve ever known how to do. I was basically born with a hammer and a wrench in my hands and I was capable of building toys for myself when I was like four. After an accident…” He refrained from mentioning his mother because he couldn’t guarantee he would be able to stay calm if he brought that up. “… I haven’t been able to light up a match or anything like that. But almost five years ago, two awesome women adopted me and one of them is a mechanic. She reminded me what I really love about tinkering and it was then that I decided that I wanna keep trying. It’s a process but I am working on it.”

The professor smiled a little. “You know… a lot of our students were unable to take the chemistry lab course in the fall, so we decided to organize another course now in the spring. As it happens, there’s still some room for new people in it. So, if you’re interested, you’re welcome. But remember, you would need to attend all the mandatory classes and complete the tasks that you are assigned, no exceptions. That means we will not be going easy on you just because of your fear.”

Leo’s eyes widened with surprise. He hadn’t expected to get a chance like that.

“Woah, thanks sir! I won’t let you down!”

“That’s good to hear,” the professor nodded approvingly. “Can I ask you a question, though? Why do you want to become a mechanical engineer? I mean, what exactly is it that fascinates you about it, other than the influences you have gotten at your home?”

Leo imagined that the professor could probably see the bolts and nuts moving in his brain as he formed his answer. “I… I wanna learn to develop products that will help us make the world a safer, more sustainable place for us. We engineers, if anyone, can develop technology that will help us achieve that goal. But that’s not all. I also wanna learn more so I can help to share the information forward. I wanna show kids who come from similar backgrounds as I that they should keep on dreaming. There was a time when my mom ate porridge - only porridge - for her meals so she could pay the rent when her business was slow, but she still kept doing it. Because that’s how much she cared about her job. And I want to continue in her footsteps.”

The professor shifted on his seat. “That is an admirable goal, Mr. Valdez. I hope you will succeed. Remember, you do have the skill – you just need to know how to use it.”

“Yeah… Thanks professor.”

“No problem. Don’t forget the class enrollments end tonight so you need to be fast if you want to participate. That’s all for now. Good luck in your future endeavors.”

“Thanks. I’ll go enroll myself then. Bye for now.”

“See you, Mr. Valdez.”

Leo breathed a long sigh of relief the moment he stepped out of the professor’s office. The meeting had gone way better than he had dared to expect. He hadn’t thought he would get another chance so fast, but was grateful for the opportunity. Now, he would only need to kick his fears into the deepest pits of Tartarus, as Calypso would say.

[mendesblurb]

WHERE IS THE LOVE

Shawn Mendes x female reader

Warning: fluff, maybe grammar error and maybe some punctuation errors and maybe typos

GIF Credits to owner and maker @tannerandthesociety-backup

It felt like it was just yesterday when you were a new transfer student entering a high school in Toronto.

You were forced to relocate to another country because your dad was offered a promotion at work. You were so happy when he conveyed the news even though you were a little sad that you had to move to another country.

First day of school was tough as nobody wanted to get to know the new kid. You were about to give up when a group of guys asked whether they could sit with you during lunch.

Because you were lonely and desperate for friends you said yes. Those guys were Shawn,Brian and Connor. Soon the four of you became inseparable, you see the thing is for other people at the school they were the three weirdos and now you were their newest member.

The three of you were there from the beginning of Shawn's music career. You were there when his vine blew up and you were all so proud when stitches went trending.

Fast forward to now, you are currently on a summer break from university and what better way to spend your break than joining your best friend’s world tour.

Today you were off to the land of the rising sun aka Japan. As soon as you reach your seat, all you want you to do is take a nap. But unfortunately that was just impossible as you were sitting in next to Brian and Connor.

“Guys please let me sleep.” You whinnied

“Nope, Y/N you're so busy with boring University assignments and now we can finally catch up with each other .” Brian said

“Hey Y/N, what’s stopping you two?” Connor asked

“What do you mean?” You said in lazy tone and eyes still closed

“Let me rephrase it for you my dear, do you or do you not still have feelings for Shawn?” Connor said cheekily

You opened your eyes immediately and said, “Connor wtf?” You said while elbowing him

“Owww, but seriously that sounds like a yes to me, right Brian?” Connor said

“Uhm without a doubt.” Brian nod his head

“Look Y/N, all I’m saying is It will be a dream come true if you and Shawn finally decide to take your friendship to the next level.” Connor said

“What are you trying to say Con, stop giving me riddles.” You whined

“All I’m saying is I know our Shawnie like you too and I have a plan to make him confess his feelings to you.” Connor said

“Whatever brilliant plan you think you have, I don’t want to know because whatever feelings I have towards him will just ruin our friendship.” You replied

“Cmon Y/N, please!” He said while giving you his puppy eyes

“I just don’t want to ruin our friendship, Con.” you said

“I pinky promise, your friendship won’t be ruined.” He said

“Fine, tell me your so-called amazing plan” you replied

“Brian, will you do the honours of explaining the plan to this amazing lady here.” Connor said

“ it would be my pleasure.” He said while giggling

The next few hours flew by and soon you were arriving at theHaneda Airport. Upon arriving the four of you and all the crew rushed to the hotel.

————The next morning———————————-

“Good morning Y/N and Con.” Shawn said in a clearly still sleepy face

Shawn was sleepy but not blind as he saw his 2 best friends standing rather close to each other. Connor’s hand was wrapped around your waist and his face was buried in your neck.

“Oh hey Shawn, didn’t see you there.” You said and immediately you turned your attention back to Connor and he whispered to your ear,”pretend I said something funny and you loved it.” In response you just giggled and Completely ignored Shawn.

Shawn felt annoyed and decided to go and find Brian. After spotting Brian, Shawn decided to approach his table.

Shawn plopped on the seat next to

Brian, resting his head in one of his hands while the other aggressively stabbed the watermelon in his bowl with a fork.

“Dude, don’t blame the watermelon when you have a jetlag!” Brian said

"I am not jetlag" Shawn mumbled through gritted teeth and annoyed expression, lifting his eyes to look at you again, gripping the fork tighter when he saw who you were with.

Brian followed his friend's eyes, and he was crossing his fingers and hoping his plan worked when his eyes landed on you. But for now he just sighed and put his hand on Shawn’s shoulder, to somehow give him support over the image of his two best friends acting all flirty toward one another.

You made your way through the hotel restaurant to find Brian’s table while holding Connor’s hand. This was part of the whole plan, you and Connor had to act all flirty with each other during breakfast.

Hey guys" You playfully greeted, reaching the table, a big smile on your face as you sat across from them.

Before Connor could sit down next yo you, he got a phone call from Andrew saying that he needs to finish editing the video now so he excused himself and went back to his room.

"Hi Y/n" Brian happily replied, lightly nudging Shawn’s elbow when he didn't say anything.

Your smile instantly replaced by a frown, when you noticed Shawn was just focused on his watermelon , avoiding your gaze. By now you wonder, whether the plan actually worked because the last thing you want is to ruin your friendship.

"So how did you guys sleep?" You awkwardly asked, focusing your curious eyes on Brian, waiting for him to tell you what was going on with Shawn.

“Uh ... not much but managed to get 6 hours" Brian said. "So, when did you get all lovey dovey with Connor?" He asked to take the attention away from Shawn, but he mentally he knew that's probably the last thing Shawn wants to hear right now.

"Oh last night Connor confessed his feelings and I said I felt the same" You smiled back again, meanwhile Shawn just choked at his glass of milk.

By now Shawn was coughing and you quickly asked, “ Shawn you okay, here have my water.”

“I’m good Y/N, thanks.” Shawn replied but still avoiding your meet your eye

“He confessed his feelings and now you guys are showing all the PDA" He teased in a mocking tone making you frown for the second time, because it wasn't a sarcastic mocking tone, it was a mean mocking tone.

"I mean he is proud to say that He has feelings for me and now he just wants other people to know about our love too so I will say it’s a sweet gesture he likes and I really enjoy it too" You defended yourself, and Shawn just chuckled.

"I'm pretty sure that's just a rebound,I mean we're talking about Connor, He makes everyone think he has moved on from his ex and Y/n, I'm sure he just wants to have a tour fling to show his ex." Shawn proudly said

"So you're saying I'm just some fling for him?" You asked, ignoring the way your heart ached from Shawn who was thinking so low of your other best friend.

"What I'm saying is the guy still constantly talks about his ex , so my advice is you shouldn't be that excited about your new relationship status because he'll just end up going back to his ex.” He stated while obviously still clouded by jealousy.

"Seriously why can’t you be happy that I end up with Connor, Mendes" You painfully said, before getting up from the table and leaving your bowl of cereal behind and you went back to your room.

Jealousy could trigger many things and you certainly didn’t expect Shawn would say that about Connor.

“Mendes, when was the last time she called you that?” Brian said

Mendes, you only call him that whenever you are upset with him. And now he realised that he too was blinded by the jealousy that he didn’t monitor all the words coming out of his mouth.

“ You know what I still can’t believe, I am still surprised that a guy like you could write so many songs but can never truly say anything to the person who inspired all the songs.” Brian shook his head in disapproval and left Shawn all alone at the hotel restaurant.

…………………….Later at rehearsal…………………..

Part B of the plan was for you and Connor to arrive together at the rehearsal but also you need to arrive a little late to build some type of tension, at least this theory was stated by Brian.

“Okay everyone let’s take 5, before we start.” Shawn said to the band, “Brian where‘s Y/N?” He asked

“I don’t know probably, with Connor.” Brian replied

After rehearsing for 2 songs you finally arrived at the venue with Connor.

Usually during all rehearsals or concerts you will give your full attention to Shawn and after every song you would give him a thumbs up and clap for him.

Today however it was different as he looked across the stage he saw you sitting in Connor’s lap and giggling at his cheesy jokes.

Shawn felt heartbroken when he saw you, his girl, well not exactly, his girl that isn't his but is his ... the girl he loved forever... anyway, when he saw you laugh with someone that wasn't him his heart instantly dropped.

Especially when that someone was Connor Brashier, I mean he knew that Connor was aware of his feelings toward you and he didn’t expect this type of betrayal from Connor of all people.

———- The day of the concert——————————

Today was the big day, usually Shawn felt excited because he was about to meet all his fans but today he couldn’t concentrate, he kept thinking whether things could turn out differently if he confessed his feelings sooner. Would you feel the same? One thing for sure is he would be on cloud nine if you felt the same way he did.

“Shawn, you ready?” Andrew asked

“Yeah, yeah sure.” He said clearly distracted

“Hey.” You said entering the dressing room

“Y/N, what are you doing here?” Shawn asked

“Am I not allowed to wish my best friend a goodluck?” You asked.

“Whatever Y/N just go and be with Connor.” He said

“Look Shawn I think there’s something you should know.”

“Look Y/N, I need to focus on rehearsing my lyrics so please don’t distract me.”

“Shawn I’m sorry if I ever was a distraction, I’ll be outside if you need me.” You said trying to hold back your tears

“Y/N wait! I’m sorry I didn’t mean that it’s just you’re a distraction because dammit I am in love with you and I understand that you’re with Connor now and I just think you should know how I feel about you .” He said

“Shawn I’m not with Connor, I mean the whole thing was them trying to prove to me that I wasn’t the only one who felt that way towards you… the truth is I have loved you since high school if I’m being honest.” You confessed

The next few minutes was a blur as Shawn got up from his seat to kiss you…. what you didn’t know was that the dressing room door was open and Connor and Brian were standing there.

Seeing that Brian grabbed the door handle and closed the door.

Standing at the side stage, Connor happily said, “we did it bro.”

“Damn right we did.” Brian sighed happily and they fist bumped each other.

@itsalwaysbeen305

[popculturebuffet]

Amphibia Weekly Reviews: Bessie and Mircroangelo/The Third Temple “The Things We’ve Set into Motion Cannot Be Stopped”

Hello all you happy people. It’s been a long road, with an even longer road trip, but the season’s almost over: just two more weeks of Amphibia.. and with all the build up weighing down on our heroes two things are clear: this cannot end well for Anne or anyone involved, and this is going to hurt. It’s going to hurt a LOT. it’s going to be some...

... how have I not used more MST3K gifs. Questions for later. Point is with emotional pain immient, a revolution on the way this episode only ratchets up the tension.. while also sparing some time for makeover jokes and a breather episode about snail mentorships, fashion montages and giant crabs. I do love me some giant crabs. And i’ll tell you allllll about it under the cut. 

Bessie and MicroAngelo:

This episode finds our heroes preparing for the third and final temple, loading up the wagon and preparing weapons, maps, potions, all that good stuff. 

We end up getting two plots out of this. The first is the titular one: so Polly can help prepare, Hop Pop gives Bessie the task of watchin gher snail and certified cutie MicroAngelo, that tiny Snail who I assumed would disappear forever after his intitial apperance because that’s usually what cartoons does. But much like One Piece, Al Ewing and that owl what watches me while I sleeps, Amphibia never forgets. 

It’s some Looney Tunes style shenanigans.. not the bugs or daffy, more on him later today, kind more the “Bigger more responsible party protects the smaller more vunerable or reckless one” kind you’d see eveyr so often. Tom and Jerry also really loved this. And Amphibia wears it well, with some good gags and really cute bonding and some really excellent animation on Bessie, giving the old girl plenty of life and animation. The only part I genuinely do not like is Hop Pop  blaming Bessie for.. running after micro angelo afte rhe ran off. Aka doing the job you assigned her. 

Someone i’m looking at. Regardless otherwise it’s just some fun, adorable slapstick with a downright precious ending. And hop pop DOES apologize.. and wish he was a cute snail. I do not have time to unpack all the implications there nor ponder what Hop Pop would look like in a snail costume. This week’s given my brain enough nightmares. 

So anyway, our subplot has Marcy trying to give Anne a Makeover... and her past attempts with Sasha have been objectively horrifying so Anne is rightly scared, though the armorer who comes to help with it has a blue crab so tha’ts where all my attention. I fucking love crabs.. they just look so neat. Some see the fact a spider crab being out and about in animal crossing as horrifying. I see it as oh look at my cool terrifying crab friend. About the only crab I don’t like is this asshole. 

And even then he can be VERY funny. .he’s just also an exploitative douchebag and having worked in food service, let me tell you I.. I get why Squidward is the way he is. That said Krabbyland is a masterpiece entirely because he’s such a terrible person, so it ballances out when the show’s doing it’s best. 

Point is I like crabs and I like this subplot.. though mostly because it says a LOT about who Anne and Marcy are and where there at. Part of why Marcy is so gung ho about helping Anne is she figures this is her last shot to be whoever she wants to be. But really she’s just projecting: it’s been obvious since we properly met her that Marcy.. likes living HERE more than earth. On earth she’s an outcast: her hyperfixations, her tendency to babble about things she likes, her smartness... alll things that just make people turn away from her or pick on her on earth, with only two people relaly understanding and appricating her.. maybe more but we don’t know the situation with her parents yet. As someone who is a lot of those things, I get where she’s coming from. 

So ending up in a world straight out of an rpg... she florished. Everything that made her life difficult at home suddenly made her florish: her skill with RPG’s meant she could blend in easily with the courtly high class of Newtopia, gave her a love of taking on missions, and allowed her to put her hyperfixation, knowledge and enthusasim to real world use, creating massive improvments in an already ritzy city. Everything that made her an outcast in our world made her a hero there. It’s why I worry about what’s to come: to both Grime and Andrias.. she’s the perfectly made pawn: too desperate to have Sasha back to see the kinfe he wants her to plant in Marcy’s, and too happy to be accepted to see the rpg convention, the benevolent ruler turning out ot be a puppet for the big bad, starring her in the face. Amphibia’s given her her freedom.. but it’s also left her very vunerable and may leave her alone. 

As for Anne.. she realizes how far she’s come: from selfish and kind of distructive to selfless and self reliant.. and still kind of destructive but hey, you can’t cahnge eveyrthing about yourself. It’s why when given heavy armor.. all she needs is the core of it.. something simple to guard her but nothing too complex. She’s fine with who she is.. and it’s why she’s in the best place of the three girls. And why she’s left smack in the middle of the war to come. A war she can’t stop and that will leave her having to choose one... or do the right , hard thing and choose neither and try and free them from the bad influences they’ve embded themselves in. Either way this is going to hurt both her and the audience. 

Final Thoughts: Bessie and Mircoangelo is good classic cartoon fun with a suprisingly deep subplot. Simple, but a nice pallete clensar, especially since the next episode is pretty tense and given it’s ending and eveyrthing that’s been building this season, it’s likely only going to get worse from here, so it’s nice to have a quick and breezy break before hell comes to frogtown. 

The Third Temple:

Before we get to the final temple we get a flashback showing how Sasha met Anne and Marcy. The other two were playing on the swings when two big dillholes pushed them off and Sasha selflessly and fearlessly stood up to them. And promptly beat herself up more than the bullies who dodged her and eventually got so freaked out by whatever the hell this was they ran and a friendship was born. But noticably she’s a lot diffrent 7 years ago, aproximately, than she is at 13: she’s every bit as fearless and willfull.. but the compassion she once had got buried under a need for control. It’s easy to see now WHY Marcy and Anne loved her so much: she was their friend, their protector, she cared about them.. and while she never STOPPED somewhere along the way it became less about doing the right thing for the women she loves and more about getting her way. 

And now the two have had time to heal from what their friend girlfriend became.. it’s time to rip that wound wide open as finally, after almost a season of waiting, Sasha reunites with Marcy for the first time and Anne for the second. 

Naturally her return is in time for her gem to be charged, though our heroes unware of that didn’t seek her out before going in. This time Frobo’s riding claw though weirdly dosen’t come inside. Which is a problem with Frobo’s addition to the cast as the whole: they’ve kept him out of any episode since his induction into the family and only properly explained it once. It just dosen’t make a lot of sense to me; Yes he is massively powerful but his childlike thought process counters that. He’s easy enough to write in but is left out becasue the writers don’t want to deal with an extra character. And I had more than enough of that shit when watching Ducktales. I don’t need it when your main cast isn’t NEARLY as large or hard to juggle. It’s just galling to have spent an entire season showing he was following them, give him a whole episode.. and then just forget about him because i’ts convient. Hopefully he’ll play a bigger role as things progress and we find out where he came from because his misuse is a dark spot on an otherwise great second half of the season. 

Frobo does get to prove himself useful though and open s the temple door he just weirdly dosen’t come along. But this does leave the door open for Sasha to come in as our heroes struggle with the first puzzle: Turns out this dungeon was built by a bro, seriously the temple languge is very broey and VERY hilarious contrasted with how normal for a fantasy setting the others were, as is fitting the strength gem, so our heroes have to compete feats of strength. Unfortunately this does not mean wrestling the ghost of Jerry Stiller to the ground but instead fighting some Lava Worms, and fighting just ONE of them and lifting the provided warhammers is a challenge for Anne.. and she’s the only one who can with Marcy not having enough upper body stregnth and the plantars all de-hydrated spongebob style. 

So naturally Sasha ends up being their savor, easily dispatching them and getting some help from grime who while also dehydrated, is still phsycially strong enough to be of some help. Marcy is overjoyed to see her.. and is the only one. Given Marcy hasn’t been on the wrong end of Sasha and Grime like they have, it’s understandable: while Marcy’s grappled with Sasha’s actions and grip on her and Anne, it’s been clear it hasn’t hit her as hard as it has for Anne and she likely dosen’t get the full scope of it like Anne does. To her Sasha just made a mistake and she’s back now and tha’ts what matters. To Anne and the Plantars... sasha and grime tried to kill them and Sasha then tried commiting suciide to save them. The scars of that haven’t really healed for them, nor should they. 

And given Sasha has spent the season clearly blamiing everything on Anne defying her and has been raising an army based on her resentment, and given she flew into a jealous blinding rage at finding her exes were fine and dandy without her she.. wholheartdly apologizes. 

Yeah she apologizes.. but tellingly while she talks about her and Grime being left homeless following the battle.. she leaves out everything after: The fight with Yuan, the growing rebellion, driving her friends away, the horrifying army Grime now commands. Something’s off. 

Anne naturally dosen’t trust her to do this herself and insists on coming along sitll. The next task is juts.. asking how much you lift bro, which Sasha easily passes by lifting, bro. 

The final test in Jim Crunch’s Temple of Fitness, I mean who else could’ve wrote this, is of course a big fight with a giant statue of a toad, fitting how each temple so far was built by one of the civlizations: there were frog statues and symbols in the first temple, the second was guarded by a newt and the last now has a toad guard.Though curiously.. the test itself is wholly designed for a human. Before it wasn’t 100% clear even with the hyroglyps if the chosen ones had to be human or not.. but now it’s impossible to argue otherwise. There were hints : The fact the guardian pegged her as a possible chosen one on sight , the ruins in the background of the title cards which also depict the watcher with a thousand eyes (which is what i’ll be calling him till we get his, her , they or it’s actually name. ).. but here the chamber includes a gravity increase dbz style, meaning our heroines are the only ones who can stand as the Plantars and Grimes frog and toad bodies respectively aren’t strong enough to stand anymore. And while Marcy tries it ends up falling on Anne and Sasha with Sasha being Angry Anne doesn’t trust her.. and Anne not refuting it, pointing out she has EVERY REASON not to. As she puts it “it’s not just toad tower”. For most of their lives Sasha has been controlling, caring about what she wants and not what the people she loves wants. It wasn’t just the fight there... it was simply the wakeup call to how bad a person Sasha had been. 

And for the first time in the episode.. Sasha is geniune, apologizing for what she did, and genuinely admitting how she treated Anne wasn’t wrong. it was something she coudln’t admit to herself episodes ago.. but faced with both loosing two more people due to her behavior, and having plenty of time to reflect on said behavhior.. she finally relaizes it’s her. Fuck man.. what else is there to say. 

Oh right the giant monster thing, which Anne trusts Sasha to finish.. and we get anothe rDBZ homage as Sasha removes part of her armor, which creates a CRATER, which lowers her weight enough to fight the thing. She gets a thumbs up and the honor of recharging it. 

Anne suggests opening the box.. but Marcy is VERY quick to shoot that down and suggest talking to the king. And while her reason SOUNDS good,, they don’t want to get warped somewhere ELSE at random.. it’s very clear from her actions and how quick she tried to stop it that she needs them to get to Andrias for whatever he’s talked her into. And I emphasis talked her into: Marcy trusts the king, and was in a very emotional place when he was about to talk to her at the end of season 2a... and he knew it. He knew she was at her most vunerable, most malable and trusted him completely.. and knew right then and there was his shot at getting vengance.. for him and his master. Whatever he has planned.. it’s not good. The mechancial lovecraftian horror he keeps in his creepy basement full of lost souls is a dead giveaway from that. But I don’t.. fault Marcy for it. It’s not just because I sympahtize.. to her Andrias is a good noble king trying to help her. He’s the kindly mentor she always wanted, a person who enjoys her skills dosen’t care how much she talks and has complete faith in her, something even Anne struggles with. 

But it’s VERY clear, to me at least he’s been likely using her from the moment they met: to her sh’es just an optomistic pawn, someone gullible enough to do whatever he says. I’ve always felt that her “missions” probably had some darker purpose she wasn’t aware of: getting Andrias things he needs for his army, an army she has no idea is opressing people. She’s insulated from that and instead surronded by adoring people who accept her for once. Even going to wartwood, she hasn’t yet made the connection between the toad towers and what their purpose is. I think deep down she might suspect this stuff.. but she can’t ACCEPT that the one person who every had nothing but faith in her.. is a horrible person who opresses others and somehow has even WORSE plans in store. 

Sasha likewise is facing the pressure of her parental figure.. while her patching it up with Anne was legitmate... her and Grime’s own plans rely on getting in there and Grime simply sees the other two as pawns , and just like the king he wants he wants to overthrow, their use expires once his plans in motion. 

But the thing is.. it’s clear despite assuring Grime she’s still all in.. her face in the last shot, as seen above.. says otherwise. Her apology was legitmate, not just an attempt to get close to the one thing in her way of power, but what she’s come to realize: she’s gone from blaming Anne for it.. to realizing it was her. But she’s also stuck: while Marcy is unaware of the strings her pupeteer is pulling her towards.. Sasha is all too aware of what her mentor is planning. And the thing was she was all too willing to go for it. She blamed Anne for what happened at the tower, blamed Anne for turning marcy against her and blamed the plantars and co for turning anne against her. But in the harsh light of day... none of that’s true. Marcy dosen’t hate her, neither does anne, they didn’t turn against her.. they were just tired of her shitty behavior and wanted the friend they found that day on the playground back, the woman they loved who’d go to hell and back for someone and not the bitter, manipultive person she became. She’s once again realized it was her fault.. the question is if that’s enough for her to do the right thing or not. And the hardest question of all is IF not reblling isn’t the right thing. Wfhile the Toad’s probably shoudln’t be in charge either, Andrias REALLY shouldn’t. There’s NO easy answers here, no happy outcome that makes everyone live’s better. There’s no easy way out, no shortcut home.. just the louder and louder drumbeats of war and one girl’s decision of whose side she’s going to take.

Final Thoughts on the Third Temple: As with the other four sasha episodes thus far, this was frogging brilliant. Shoudln’t be a suprise and it makes me both look forward and dread the war to come

Next Week: The plantars try to bury the hatchet with Sasha and Grime, the girls enter a battle of the bands, and the finale comes ever closer.

If you liked this review follow me for more, and join my patreon. At just 2 dollars a month you get acess to my discord, exclusive reviews, and get me closer to my stretch goals. See you at the next rainbow

[merakilyy]

Inconceivable

By no means does Lan Qiren like Wei Wuxian. Of course not. But yelling at Wei Wuxian is a pastime for him to enjoy alone and it is a grievous insult for Sect Leader Yao to take that joy away from him.

Aka: how Lan Qiren, of all people, ended up defending Wei Wuxian in front of everyone.

Tags: Wangxian, post-canon, canon compliant, fluffy humour

(On AO3) Word count: about 3100

~~~

These days, Lan Qiren has mostly retired from the day to day business of running a sect. For all his nephews’ past errors in judgement, they have been raised well and are leading a thriving Gusu. With the future of the Sect secure, Lan Qiren now spends his days terrorizing the junior disciples, having meditative teas with the Gusu Lan elders, and avoiding Wei Wuxian at all costs.

It is a fine way to live.

Avoiding Wei Wuxian is not difficult. He is wherever the noise is. Minor explosions in the Jingshi have become commonplace as Wei Wuxian tests new talismans and invents new tools for night hunting and releasing resentful spirits.

Yet for all his faults, of which there are a great many, Lan Qiren finds it increasingly difficult to retain his burning hatred of Wei Wuxian when he is just so useful.

Beyond his capacity to churn out invention after invention, Wei Wuxian is an excellent instructor both in class and on nighthunts in the field. Lan Qiren has noticed how the junior disciples assigned to Wei Wuxian’s lectures are able to successfully perform more advanced maneuvers beyond their expected cultivation level. Their essays are of a higher level and clearly demonstrate a deeper understanding of theories of spiritual cultivation. Certainly, this advanced standard was expected of Lan Sizhui but Lan Qiren found this improvement in each of the junior disciples. Even Lan Jingyi had become a good student.

Wei Wuxian could even make Lan Jingyi sit still for longer than fifteen minutes.

Faced with such facts, even Lan Qiren has to set aside his burning dislike of Wei Wuxian and admit that Wei Wuxian is one of the most valuable members of the Gusu Lan Sect.

Also, Wei Wuxian makes Wangji the happiest Lan Qiren has ever seen him. And Lan Qiren has learned his lesson when it comes to questioning Wangji’s devotion.

So, as long as Wei Wuxian continues to make Wangji happy, Lan Qiren will continue to tolerate his existence. Only for Wangji, of course.

There are many days where Lan Qiren longs for the days before Wei Wuxian returned. He longs for the days when the aura of Cloud Recesses was serene and sedate. He misses the tranquility of the past. He has requested that Wangji at least limit Wei Wuxian’s experimentation to the back mountains where they will not disturb the others. But his younger nephew is ridiculously infatuated with Wei Wuxian and cannot deny the man anything so the noise remains.

It makes Lan Qiren’s blood boil but Wei Wuxian is just so incredibly useful.

Lan Qiren knows that Jiang Wanyin would like Wei Wuxian to return to Yunmeng, even if only for part of the year, and that Jin Rulan would like Wei Wuxian to join him in Lanling to help him clean up the mess left behind by Jin Guangyao but Wei Wuxian is a member of Gusu Lan now. He has officially married into Gusu Lan and even has his own forehead ribbon (that Wangji wears after their ribbons were exchanged as per Gusu marriage ritual) and Lan Qiren isn’t letting Wei Wuxian go anywhere. Because he is useful. No other reasons.

Definitely not because Wei Wuxian’s specific brand of chaos is growing on him.

Rarely does Lan Qiren attend discussion conferences now. Even if many cultivators still look up to him, his presence is no longer necessary. Cloud Recesses has produced many respectable cultivators who represent Gusu Lan with honour. Many of the cultivators from other Sects have also been taught by Lan Qiren; he does not need to present to instill fear into others.

Yet, as Cloud Recesses was hosting this year’s Roundtable Discussion, Lan Qiren found himself curious as to what changes had been made since the last discussion he participated in when Jin Guangyao was still the Chief Cultivator.

And, since Wei Wuxian had single handedly organized this entire conference, Lan Qiren may have been just the slightest bit curious as to how it would turn out.

Regardless of his reasoning, Lan Qiren was well within his rights to participate in the discussion despite the apprehensive look Wangji gave him when he requested a seat.

As Lan Qiren settles at his table, he watches his nephews as they welcome each Sect into Cloud Recesses’ main reception hall. His nephews are the embodiment of decorum and Lan Qiren feels a subtle pride at watching his nephews masterfully carry out their duties. Still, he pretends he doesn’t see how Wangji glares as they greet Sect Leader Jiang or how Xichen tenses when Sect Leader Nie arrives. The young Sect Leader Jin complains about having to leave his dog behind but a single look from Wangji silences the boy mid sentence. More amicably, Xichen gently reminds Sect Leader Jin that “pets are forbidden in Cloud Recesses.”

In the background, he sees Wei Wuxian running around with Lan Jingyi and Lan Sizhui quickly walking after him, making last minute adjustments and throwing purifying talismans around the room. Wei Wuxian floats around the room in his white Gusu Lan robes, Wangji’s original forehead ribbon tied snugly in his hair. Most of the time Wei Wuxian wears his plain black and red robes and Lan Qiren has learned to accept that. Begrudgingly. But, Wangji was adamant that Wei Wuxian attend intersect meetings as an official representative of Gusu Lan and therefore he must dress the part.

Wei Wuxian’s red hair ribbon is wrapped around Wangji’s wrist, under his sleeve, and Lan Qiren chooses to pretend he never sees the flashes of red silk when Wangji moves his arms.

Lan Qiren watches as Wei Wuxian pauses by a table and bends over to pick up the cup. Wei Wuxian frowns as if the cup has offended him and hands it to Lan Sizhui. Wei Wuxian says something Lan Qiren can’t hear but he sees Lan Sizhui nod once before taking the cup away. Sizhui returns shortly afterwards with a new cup which he passes to Wei Wuxian. After studying the cup and nodding approvingly, Wei Wuxian sets the cup back down on the table and continues fluttering around the room.

For all his bluster as a guest disciple, and as the Yiling Patriarch, Wei Wuxian had always been a hard worker.

(He pretends he doesn’t see Wei Wuxian leave a peony tied to a little note on Wangji’s desk at the front of the hall.)

The conference itself is largely uneventful. They proceed point by point through the agenda without any major hiccups until Sect Leader Jin pushes forward his proposal. What Sect Leader Jin wants is for each Sect to encourage their junior disciples to participate in night hunts in small border villages to vanquish low level spirits and minor monsters. This will bolster the training of the youth and give them more practical experience, Jin Rulan argues, as well as help impoverished communities who cannot afford a senior cultivator.

It is a good idea, Lan Qiren has to admit.

“Preposterous!” Sect Leader Yao interjects rather rudely. It is clear he views Jin Ling as a weakness to be exploited for the benefit of his own Sect, even though it should be equally clear that Jiang Wanyin and Wei Wuxian would never allow that to happen. “This will only encourage more penniless children to train as cultivators.”

“So!?” Sect Leader Jin fires back. Lan Qiren’s brows furrow at Jin Rulan’s insolence. How unfortunate that Jin Rulan became Sect Leader before he could come to Cloud Recesses as a guest disciple. “Then we have more people who can release resentful spirits.”

“This child,” Sect Leader Yao shakes his finger at Sect Leader Jin, as if disciplining a misbehaving child. Jiang Wanyin’s ever-present frown deepens. The hand that brandishes Zidian is clenched in a fist though Jiang Wanyin says nothing. Despite his youth, Sect Leader Jin can hold his own. “He really has no manners! If only his parents survived to teach him better.”

Suddenly Lan Qiren is reminded why he no longer takes part in these conferences.

Beside him, Lan Qiren sees how Wei Wuxian’s previously respectable posture wilts. Instinctively, Lan Qiren wants to snap at Wei Wuxian to sit properly but he also notices how Wangji’s focus has shifted away from Sect Leader Yao and Sect Leader Jin. Instead, Wangji is watching Wei Wuxian, brow subtly furrowed with worry.

“Sect Leader Yao,” a high ranking member of Lanling Jin speaks out, “watch your words! Our Sect Leader has done you no insult!”

“You misunderstand,” Sect Leader Yao shakes his head disparagingly, as if it is tiresome to have to explain himself. “I do not blame young Jin Rulan for the unfortunate death of his late parents. If only Wei Wuxian had not killed Jin Zixuan and Jiang Yanli,” Sect Leader Yao pauses to sigh dramatically. Lan Qiren can feel the beginnings of a migraine. “I always said that Jiang Fengmian was too soft, that the son of a servant could never amount to anything worthwhile.”

Lan Qiren sees Wangji’s eyes harden almost imperceptibly. He sees how Wei Wuxian winces, how his entire body tenses. Behind them, Lan Sizhui and Lan Jingyi share concerned glances.

To Lan Qiren’s surprise, it is Jiang Wanyin who speaks in defense of Wei Wuxian. “Sect Leader Yao, I will thank you not to disparage the name of my late father and martial brother. Yunmeng Jiang exists today only on account of Wei Wuxian’s extraordinary sacrifices. Despite his practices, Wei Wuxian walks a noble path and it has been established that Su Minshan was responsible for the incident at Qiongqi Path.”

Wei Wuxian looks as surprised as Lan Qiren feels. A cursory glance around the room shows that they aren’t alone in their shock.

Sect Leader Yao sneers. “As if someone who plays with wicked tricks and desecrates the dead could ever be righteous. Surely one who willfully performs such heinous acts cannot be compared to true virtuous cultivators as myself.”

“Sneering for no reason is forbidden.” Lan Qiren calmly recites the rule from the Wall of Discipline. Although Gusu Lan has always been lenient towards transgressions of their tenets by visiting sects during meetings, Lan Qiren is well within his rights to remind Sect Leader Yao that they are in Cloud Recesses, that he is disrespecting Gusu Lan’s practices, and that he is being discourteous to the Chief Cultivator’s spouse.

Lan Qiren continues listing the rules violated by Sect Leader Yao. “Do not praise yourself and slander others. Do not take advantage of your position to oppress others. Do not insult others. Do not make assumptions about others.” He pauses momentarily, well aware that the entire room is stunned. Even before he stepped back from intersect diplomacy, Lan Qiren had taken the standard Gusu Lan approach of playing the silent observer and mediating conflicts. Looking directly at Sect Leader Yao, Lan Qiren finishes with, “Be respectful of others.”

He is received with silence. Unbothered, Lan Qiren pours himself a cup of tea with the tea set he watched Wei Wuxian painstakingly set up and personally prepare earlier that morning. Taking a sip, he notes that Wei Wuxian has -- annoyingly -- chosen an excellent brew and has even thought to use a talisman to keep the tea shimmering at just the right temperature.

It is difficult to despise someone who is just so competent.

As Lan Qiren is pouring himself a second cup of tea, one of Sect Leader Yao’s underlings pipes up. “You defend an immoral adherent of the heretical path! Wei Wuxian is a scourge amongst us! He is no cultivator, only the son of a servant who has turned his back on righteousness!”

“Enough,” Lan Qiren says firmly. He is not loud, but his words reverberate around the room.

Everyone is openly staring at him now, even his nephews. Especially his nephews. Xichen looks like he is convinced Lan Qiren is going through a qi derivation. Wangji’s expression flickers between concern and incredulity as his eyes bounce between his husband and his uncle. Lan Qiren pointedly refuses to look beside him to see Wei Wuxian’s expression.

Even Lan Qiren has to admit that he is surprised at himself. Not for speaking out -- Gusu Lan has never condoned insulting one’s character over personal grievances. Even at the height of his hatred for Wei Wuxian, Lan Qiren could understand that Wei Wuxian made decisions that he deemed to be righteous even if his methods were reprehensible. But, Lan Qiren was surprised to find himself speaking out in defense of Wei Wuxian.

Hearing Lan Jingyi’s loud whispers to Lan Sizhui behind him, Lan Qiren makes a mental note to assign more handstands.

With everyone stunned speechless at the turn of events, Lan Qiren continues, “Wei Wuxian is an invaluable member of Gusu Lan. We cannot stand by and allow such a grievous insult to go unacknowledged.”

Lan Qiren takes another sip of his tea. Still excellent, still at the optimal temperature. How infuriating, that Wei Wuxian has become the only one to serve passable tea at these conferences.

Someone from Baling Ouyang whom Lan Qiren does not recognize looks like he wants to voice his disagreements. Lan Qiren simply allows his gaze to bore into the Baling cultivator until the man looks away, ashamed.

“An insult to the Chief Cultivator’s spouse is an affront to Gusu Lan,” Lan Qiren says with finality, slowly turning his head as he speaks to ensure everyone understands the weight behind his words. “We will not stand by and condone such disparagement.”

He ignores the wet sniffle that comes from Wei Wuxian.

Behind him, Lan Jingyi’s whispers grow even louder. Lan Qiren hears Lan SIzhui trying to shush Lan Jingyi in vain. More handstands, he thinks. Perhaps some lines.

Jiang Wanyin gives Wei Wuxian an accusatory glare, as if Wei Wuxian replaced the real Lan Qiren with a doppelganger and was holding the real Lan Qiren hostage in the back mountains.

Wangji simply looks down at the scrolls on his desk with a pleased smile gracing his lips.

No one is in any rush to fill in the silence that has overwhelmed the hall. Sect Leader Yao looks adequately chastened for his denigrating remarks toward Wei Wuxian. Lan Qiren suspects everyone else is too scared to speak now.

Good , he thinks. Silence begets reflection.

In the end, it is Xichen who redirects the discussion to the matter at hand. “I am in agreement with Sect Leader Jin,“ Xichen says. “We cannot ignore the likelihood that it is the very insular nature of our community that contributed to Jin Guangyao’s actions. I cannot and do not forgive him for murdering a sworn brother but his circumstances were always regrettable. We turned our back on him before he ever turned his back on us. With the increased need for cultivators, we may consider opening cultivational training to average families.”

Subtly, Xichen also adds, “We cannot condone personal attack for one’s parentage.”

The discussion continues without any further incidents and Lan Qiren does not speak again. After Xichen’s speech, he does spy Lan Sizhui passing a handkerchief to Wei Wuxian from the corner of his eye but Lan Qiren resolutely refuses to look at Wei Wuxian.

Once the day’s meeting comes to an end, Wei Wuxian jumps to his feet and bounds directly to Wangji. Outrageous, Lan Qiren thinks without any real heat.

Just as Lan Qiren rises to his own feet, Wei Wuxian bounces back to speak to him. Wangji follows closely behind, a pleased expression on his face. They come to a stop just before Lan Qiren and bow. After they rise, Lan Qiren notices Wangji’s hand resting tenderly, protectively, on Wei Wuxian’s waist.

“Old Man Lan, I didn’t know you cared!” Wei Wuxian chirps brightly. Instinctively, Lan Qiren can feel his blood pressure rising from such an informal address. But, he has long since realized that Wei Wuxian has mastered balancing on the line between propriety and impropriety to infuriate without causing genuine outrage.

“I do not.” Lan Qiren folds his arms in his sleeves, looking every bit the respectable Elder he is. “An insult to the Chief Cultivator’s spouse is an affront to Gusu Lan,” he repeats his words from earlier. “It is unacceptable.”

Wangji frowns. “Insults to Wei Ying are common.” Wangji looks content enough to have his husband back in his arms, but there is a dangerous glint in his eyes as though he is prepared to skewer every cultivator who looks at Wei Ying without the utmost respect with Bichen.

Glancing over at Wangji and Wei Wuxian, Lan Qiren thinks they are standing too close. It is improper to display such outward demonstrations of affection.

But Lan Qiren doesn’t say anything.

“I mean, it’s not entirely undeserved,” Wei Wuxian says softly to Wangji. Lan Qiren is almost disgusted by how much love they radiate simply by existing in the presence of the other.

Wangji’s frown deepens as his arm tightens around Wei Wuxian. He turns to look directly at Wei Wuxian’s face and Wei Wuxian looks up in return. Wei Wuxian’s hand comes to cover Wangji’s hand where it rests on his waist.

By the way Wei Wuxian and Wangji are wordlessly gazing at each other with minute changes in their expressions, Lan Qiren can tell they are having a completely separate conversation silently.

Lan Qiren clears his throat pointedly, reminding Wangji and Wei Wuxian of his presence. “Wei Ying has atoned,” Wangji says, verbalizing their conversation even though he is still looking at Wei Wuxian.

“It’s an occupational risk.” Wei Wuxian looks away from Wangji as his gaze drops. His smile is not sad, exactly, but it is very subdued and Lan Qiren realizes that he does not enjoy seeing such melancholy on Wei Wuxian’s face. (Only because that somber look is mirrored on Wangji’s face and Wei Wuxian’s sole purpose in Cloud Recesses to make Wangji happy. Definitely not because Lan Qiren cares about Wei Wuxian in any way, shape or form.)

Huffing impatiently, Lan Qiren waves a disapproving finger in Wei Wuxian’s face. “You are a member of Gusu Lan. Do not shame us by allowing your detractors to address you with such offense.”

“And you,” Lan Qiren continues, shifting his ire to Wangji, “do not leave your spouse to protect himself. I taught you myself that diplomacy requires the presentation of a united front.”

With one last unimpressed look at Wei Wuxian and Wangji, Lan Qiren swept his arms behind his back and strode out of the meeting hall.

As he walked away, Lan Qiren decided he was growing too soft in his old age.

He’d have to remedy that softness by assigning Lan Jingyi some lines to complete during his handstands.

~~~

Just so we are very clear, I do not condone Lan Qiren’s view that Wei Wuxian is /letting/ others walk all over him. But, I do think that is the most in character approach Lan Qiren would have towards encouraging Wei Wuxian given his affinity for the tough love approach.

[temptingempress]

The Mafia’s Princess (3)

Summary: “I can’t loose you because if I loose you I loose myself. You’re all I have left.” she begged him to put the gun down. Her bloody knees splashed into the mud. Helicopters surrounded them and the sirens were getting closer and closer but she could think about was him. The man whom she fell in love with, standing in front of them. Gun pointed towards his head.

This is a HoseokxOc story but feel free to think of her as y/n. I just didn’t want to call her y/n so I used my own character that you’ll see in a lot of my stories but her mood and temperament will change in each story. The character depicted in the photo is my imagination of her, you can depict her anyway you would like.

Warning: Injuries, swearing, knife mentions, mafia mentions (obviously), a little bit of angst. 

Previous: https://temptingempress.tumblr.com/post/641614237353099264/the-mafias-princess-jhs-2

“Almost there.” Hoseok huffed as they climbed the hill that led to the abandoned garage. The garage was originally popular amongst the civilians but the town turned into a ghost town, which made it the perfect place for mafia’s to meet up for certain things. 

Areum’s P.O.V

I let out a slight giggle hearing Hoseok’s huffs and his struggles to make it up the hill. For a big buff mafia man you’d think he could walk thousands of miles but he could get out of breath just by opening a jar of pickles. “Come on Muscle Man. Just a few more feet to go.” I teased earning a hearty chuckle back from him. “You gotta remember that I hauled your ass for like 3 miles.” He poked my head gently but still managed to make me flinch. “Scaredy cat, ah, there it is.”  Hoseok’s P.O.V

Oh thank goodness, I was about to fall face down out of exhaustion, It’s been hours that I’ve been on my damn feet. The large garage was right behind the abandoned mall aka the drug trade. I leaned against the concrete wall showered in explicit graffiti. Taking out my phone I dialed the driver’s number. I took Areum’s hand and pulled her closer to me “Stay close, the crackheads lurk.” The phone then picked up and he said his usual phrase “Annyeonghaseyo jeoneun bangtan sonyeondan hwanggeum maknae jeon jungkook imnida”  “Where are you.” I asked him bluntly, too tired to deal with his absurdness right now.  “Ahh, I’m in the garage.” The sound of the engine rumbles in the background making it hard to decipher what he was saying  “I’m with Cynthia and we are on the fifth flight!” Letting out a low groan, I sure didn’t have it in me to walk five flights up. My legs would surely give out or possibly crack in half. “Drive the car down, the damsel in injured.” Areum crossed her arms as her cheeks puffed out like two balloons “Why do I have to be the damsel? Do I look like I’m in distress? Why can’t I be the hero or the even the black widow!” she went on and on but her words begun to blur out. I was only focused on how to get into that damn car and get back to the house as fast as we humanly could. “I can’t boss, someone might catch us!” “Jungkook that’s a demand not an order. If anyone sees us then we’ll just send an assassin out or something.” “Ah! Quiet down boss. I’m comin I’m comin. You’re gonna get us caught one day.” he then hung up on me which made me slightly irritated. “I should’ve never hired that damn maknae.” Areum slouches next to me but she still with held the smile lurking on her lips. Times like these, it gets comforting to see especially from her. “How do you do it huh?” I chuckled a bit and took her wrist, pulling her closer to me so we could warm each other up in this cold weather. “How do you manage to smile in the most fucked up situations?”  “Well, as long as I’m with you the situation isn’t that bad. Besides, I like to see you struggle.” She jokes with a slight laugh giving me the answer I should’ve anticipated. 

“Ha ha.” I sarcastically laugh along, ruffling her hair up with my rough fingers. Then, the car finally arrived. It was a old and dirty truck which suits this place very well. I opened up the back door for Areum to go in first. If anyone saw us pull up in a brand new red convertible they would know something was up. Jungkook then put his foot on the gas and pulled off rather very fast. Areum rushed to put her seatbelt on while everyone else just sat there exhausted. It was just the wee hours in the morning, nobody was on the roads so Jungkook cranked the windows down. As long as nobody recognized Areum or me, we should be good. We took the back roads just to make sure. Jungkook turned on the speakers to his favorite songs then spoke loudly “How’d your little getaway go!”  Cynthia, the co leader of this mafia, turned down the speakers to allow Areum and I to rest. “Jungkook, why do you have to be so loud all the time?”  I knew Cynthia every since I inherited this whole mafia business. She’s always been like a sister to me. She was there whenever I needed her and whenever I didn’t. 

I put my hands behind my head and let out a long sigh “It was nice until someone called the damn cops on us.” I let the wind cool me off as I closed my eyes “That part really spoiled the whole entire thing.” Areum hummed to the country music playing in the background. “But it wasn’t anything we couldn’t handle! Right Hoseok?” “Mmhm.” I felt myself falling into a deep sleep. My energy to perform anything at this point was drifting away. 

Areum’s P.O.V

I took a cover from the floor and draped it over Hoseok he looked like he was passed out. I couldn’t blame him. “I’m sure Hoseok took good care of you... as always.” Cynthia sighed to herself.  My face scrunched up as I felt slightly offended, I tried to calm myself down, trying not to get that stuck up princess attitude I always tend to have... I’m working on that. I am. “I guess.” I felt my leg start to sting a bit. The adrenaline was running out and the pain was setting in. Letting out a quiet grunt I held my leg close  “I got bit and scratched by dogs.” Jungkook turned back to see the blood beginning to drip down my leg again. I must’ve injured it when I got back up to walk. “Yikes.” Jungkook spoke “Don’t worry, we’re almost there.” He passed me a box of tissues “Here”.

 Cynthia looked at me then back to the road “You have to stop being so careless whenever you’re around him.” “Careless?” I took the tissues and started to wipe off as much blood as I could. Once I saw the cut, it only stung even more. I couldn’t think of a smart response because of it. It hurts like hell but I wanted to keep my composure. 

Strong women don’t cry right? 

Besides, I wanted to be strong for him. I wanted to be strong to Hoseok and to prove everyone that I deserve to be here.

As we drove up to the big mansion where the mafia resided in Jungkook parked the car and I was cared for immediately getting escorted to their little medical room by her assigned nurses. Out of the corner of my eye she saw Cynthia caring for Hoseok, walking him back inside with one of his arms draped around her shoulder. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel a hint of jealously inside my heart. Ever since I’ve met her she’s always given me ‘Oh, I’m better than you’ vibes but I’ve been trying to brush it off. I don’t want my own jealousy to get in the way of Hoseok and I. I never did. I looked up to a girl with a silver necklace hanging down her neck. It was Lisa, Hoseok’s sister.

-

“Follow me” she hums as she takes the mysterious criminals hand. They were rough and she noticed that they were also tatted. She couldn’t get a full glimpse but it looked like part of a dragons tale. The man spoke up as the princess led him through the endless maze of twist and turns.

Hoseok’s P.O.V

“Why are you helping me?” This could be a big trap but then again I have no choice. If it wasn’t for her I’d be surrounded by this damn kingdom and if she pulled anything stupid I have a gun right on my hip and I’m not afraid to shoot little miss princess. A person who gets anything and everything under her fingertips. People like her is the whole reason why me and my family rebelled. People like her enforced the stupid laws society has, People like her ruin everything I’ve worked for but here I was holding her hand. Her grip was tight so it wasn’t like I could let go. “Because I want to help you.” She hums with a slight smile “Besides the castle needed a little action.” We then came to another dead end, this time we were surrounded by vineyards of roses and fine grapes.  “And you do realize that you are helping the number one felon in Korea right now?”

Before the princess could respond she ripped the bottom half of her expensive dress off so she could have more freedom in her strides which threw me off a bit. Her thighs are now fully exposed and she had not problem with that. “So?” She took the fabric and tied it along her thigh “You do realize that the wealthiest girl in Korea is helping a felon out right?” She echos. “Do you have a knife?”  I pulled out a pocket knife and handed it to her, even though I probably shouldn’t of. This was getting pretty interesting and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to know where it was going. The princess went up to the vines and cut them open. I chuckled as she did so “Very smart princess,  but wouldn’t they follow us inside-” After she was done cutting the vines a door was revealed. She twisted the golden knob and it led us inside what seemed like to be a small bedroom, with a tv, bed, and a large bookcase. There were paintings on the wall but they seemed like they were either drawn by her or someone else. 

The princess pressed on a red button and the vines attached to one another again as if nothing even happened. The princess smiled at me, feeling proud of herself for helping a person like myself out. “You’re welcome.” she beams I scoffed to myself and looked around her mini hideout “You led me to a bed. I’m not interested in making out with you right now, I need to get back to my base.” “Make out?” She crosses her arms and a light blush appears on her face “I wouldn’t t-touch you with a ten foot pole!”  I looked down at her hand still attached to mine but she quickly let go of it. I sighed as I started to look around. Thinking about how I could ever get out of here without getting caught. I didn’t want to escape in the morning because that’s when small children flood the maze. It wouldn’t be a good look for a grown man with a gun attached to his hip be in it with them. And besides, I’m on a time schedule.

 The princess spoke once again, her arms not leaving her chest “Who says I don’t have a way for you to get out!”  “Look sweetheart.” I took out my gun and pointed it towards her head, I really didn’t have a choice. “Stop playing games, get me out of here now or I will shoot you.” She froze once I pulled out my gun but the same smile appears onto her face. What was this girl? Some type of psychopath? “You wouldn’t kill me Mister. If you did you’d spend more time in prison or possibly the dungeon than you’d intend to. Ah, who am I kidding they’d possibly put you to death.”  I didn’t drop the gun but she did make a point. I know at some point in my life that I was going to go to jail or die but it’s too soon in the game. I plan to hold my father’s legacy until I die. “Show me the exit now.” My voice rose to stir more fear in her but it failed.

“Not until you tell me your name.” She looked me straight in the eyes. “I.. I want you to be my friend.” “I’m not a good friend.” I chuckled at the how naive this woman was. “I’ll tell you what. You show me the exit and you get a name. Deal?” She thought it over for a moment, lowering her arms she nodded and walked to her bookcase. she pushed it aside and there was a window. It seemed to be led to the woods. I wondered why there was even a such thing in a whole kingdom. Why was she the only one who knew about this.  “Can I get-” Before she could say another word I pushed her to the floor, causing her to loose her balance and fall. She shouted at me before I made a run for it. I should’ve killed her. The window was already unlocked to that made it easier for me. Did I feel bad about it?

No, I didn’t. 

It was my sister’s birthday and I’m already running late. I checked if I still had the necklace in my pocket and it was still in it’s pretty velvet box. -

Areum’s P.O.V

Lisa helped me onto a bed then got her gloves on. She was very careful not to hurt me anymore than I already was. I trusted her, so I allowed my eyes shut. She was a certified nurse even before this whole mafia deal begun. Lisa accessed the bite and scratches “That dog left a pretty big mark on you.” She informs as she sterilizes her equipment before she uses them. “But it’s nothing I can’t handle.” I chuckle and look down at her “You sound so cool when you say that.” She gave me a smile as she starts to apply alcohol which stung even more. I winced but held in my pain. “You can scream if you’d like. I’m not here to judge.” Lisa hummed.

Well, If I had her permission...

-

Hoseok P.O.V

“Where’s Areum?” I asked as I held onto Cynthia’s shoulder. I didn’t even notice that we were already to the quarters. I must’ve fell asleep. “She’s getting treated.” Cynthia laid me on my door post allowing me to catch my composure again. Cynthia sighs as she dusts off her red dress that she always wears whenever she’s going out. Unlike me, she could go out whenever she pleases. Her identity hasn’t been given out yet so that’s why she’s our lurer. She lures people with her “charm”  so we could eventually handle business with  them. “You know.” She walks a little closer to me, feeling my cheek to make sure that the small cut would be okay “If she keeps getting you in danger like this then I’m not sure if she’s the perfect cut for this mafia.” “Cynthia.” I sighed and pulled away from her fingers. “Not this again. Areum is just as deserving as you are.” “What Hoseok, we all know it. She can’t even fend for herself. What makes you think she could fend for you? You’re only putting her in danger, not only her us! The whole mafia empire.” She got a bit mad but she soon calmed down by the look I was giving her. “I’m tired alright, can’t we talk about this some other time?”  Cynthia gave me one last look before she went her own way. She had a mission this morning but I had a whole bunch of overdue sleeping to do until I get back on my feet again. I went inside of my room, not even caring to turn on the lights. I just kicked my shoes off and threw my body on the big master bed awaiting me. It felt amazing but yet so empty without Areum lying by my side. As I wrapped myself in the covers I couldn’t help but to think about Cynthia’s words. She was right, if people found us out then it would be over for us as we know it but...

 I guess I’m a sucker for her love but I know that this chapter will soon come to an end. It’ll take a miracle if it’s a good one. ~

I hope you guys enjoyed, if you want me to add something more spicy my dms and asks are always open :) Please like this so it gives me motivation to go on! Also, do you like the cover work?

Your friend,

                  TemptingEmpress 

[vicecityhq]

██████████████]99% LOADING...SUSPECT INTO THE APD DATABASE...

WITNESS(ES) SAY HE REMINDS THEM OF: the last plump dumpling on the plate that you and your friend fight over, the betrayal you feel when you drink a milkshake that’s too cold and get a brain freeze but it’s too good to stop, and the buzzing of a bumble bee flitting from flower to flower. With a slight resemblance to LEE JOOHEON  (JOOHONEY) of/the MONSTA X.

CLICK BELOW TO VIEW ENTIRE FILE.

FULL FILE:

Last Name, First Name: Kkul Beol (actually his full name. He doesn’t have a surname) ALIAS: Yellowjacket Realm of birth(if earth, nationality): Divine Realm Age: Unknown, but has lived 26 years in Earth realm Date of Birth: May 20th (aka World Bee Day) Gender: Male Preferred Pronouns: he/him or they/them Species: Spiritual Fairy Occupation: The Howlers, Dealer Sexual Orientation: Pansexual

VISUAL FILE:

Skin Color: Milky, pale Eye color: Varies Scars: None Piercings: Ears, Dimple piercings Tattoos:When he doesn’t have his wings out, they manifest as bold linework that follows along his shoulder blades and down his back. He has a colorful fairy pinup girl on his right inner forearm. A bumble bee design on his left upper arm that blends into a fairy circle tattoo on that inner forearm. Various weeds and flowers on his legs. Hair color: Varies Abnormalities: Since Beol can reinvent his physical form to his liking, his features may change on a whim. However, he does tend to stick to the same form, with only his hair and eye color varying. Transformed form:As a spiritual fairy, Beol’s physical form is only a formality that allows him to better experience the world. His spiritual presence is formless and genderless. It is almost like looking at dust when it catches the light.

PERSONAL FILE:

RELIGIOUS BELIEF:  N/A SINS:  greed  /  gluttony  /  sloth  / lust  /  pride  /  envy  /  wrath VIRTUES: chastity  /  charity  /  diligence  /  humility /  kindness /  patience /  justice KNOWN LANGUAGES: Korean, English, Gaelic SECRETS: Beol manages to get out of being prosecuted for his crimes by charming the officers who try to arrest him with his fairy dust or using illusions to escape. SAVVIES: drawing, getting tattooed, playing pranks. Powers & Abilities: fairy dust manipulation, healing, wish granting (but it usually has a hidden caveat), semi-immortality, empathy, energy manipulation and absorption, energy barriers, energy blasts, malleable anatomy/shapeshifting, spirit physiology, illusions, intangibility, possession, telekinesis (via fairy dust manipulation), teleportation.  Traits: (positive) chipper, animated, fun-loving and playful. (negative) fickle, impatient, gets petulant when things don’t go his way, doesn’t realize his pranks can be harmful or perhaps he feigns ignorance. Aesthetics: the last plump dumpling on the plate that you and your friend fight over, the betrayal you feel when you drink a milkshake that’s too cold and get a brain freeze but it’s too good to stop, and the buzzing of a bumble bee flitting from flower to flower.

BACKGROUND CHECK:

Date of Birth: May 20th, year unknown Date of Death: N/A Crime Record: Beol knows that he should avoid getting entangled with the authorities at all costs, but his innately mischievous nature contradicts rationality. He rather enjoys skating on thin ice when it comes to getting caught. When he was a “teen,” he often got in trouble for truancy, vandalism, and theft. Now, as an “adult,” he has to be far more conscious about getting caught. He has been charged with possession and possession with the intent to distribute, but - miraculously - has not served any jail time.

Background/Biography:

In a time long ago, Celts used to believe that when a person slept or entered a hypnotic state that their soul left the body in the form of a bee. Sometimes those souls got lost on the way back (or perhaps were detained) and found their way to the divine realm of the fae, where they would become what is known as spiritual fairies. Or at least that was the story Beol’s mother told them, but the reality was that there was no living fae who remembered exactly where they originated. Their mother would affectionately call them their ‘wandering little bee’ because Beol was an adventurous child who could never be tied down in one place. It came as no surprise to them when Beol decided to leave the realm they’d always known and venture out into the human world.

When Beol crossed over to the mortal plane, they embraced the incredibly different way of life with childish wonder and enthusiasm. At first they explored in their spiritual form and enjoyed playing all sorts of pranks on unsuspecting humans, but - as is typical of the fickle nature of fairies - that grew boring quickly. Beol eventually constructed a physical form so they could better interact with others around them. Being a young and playful soul, Beol chose the façade of a school-aged child since their fun-loving antics were very similar to his own. What he didn’t take into account, though, was that a parentless, vagrant child stood out and it wasn’t long before his friend’s parents became concerned for his well-being.

In his naivety, Beol didn’t think much of it when they’d asked where he lived and who looked after him, telling them that he took care of himself and stayed wherever he wanted. That naturally led to the police being contacted and Beol was placed in an orphanage until they could find a family for him. Truthfully, he could have simply flitted off and ventured someplace new, but the idea of living with other kids sounded like an eternal sleepover to him and how could that be bad? Of course, it wasn’t all rainbows and butterflies in the system. Many of the orphans came from broken homes and were passed around to fosters that were no better. They’d come back with new scars and bereft of their smiles, their innocence gobbled up by the darkness within others.

Beol couldn’t stand seeing them hurt. He could vividly imagine how they’d gotten each bruise like he’d experienced it himself and felt their anguish like a bottomless pit in the center of his chest. Yet he wasn’t powerless to fight against it like they were and Beol quickly went from using his abilities for harmless fun to avenging his friends. He would go out of his way to be assigned to their previous foster parents and would make sure to traumatize them so much with his illusion magicks that they never dared to take in another child again. While it did make him feel better, his habit of terrorizing parents tarnished his record and made him increasingly difficult to adopt out. Not that that bothered Beol. Sure, it was hard watching his friends eventually leave to go with loving parents, but protecting those that remained had become his responsibility and he knew he wouldn’t be able to do that if he left. Besides, he had parents and didn’t need new ones, even if his counselors never believed him when he told them.

As he “aged” into teenage years, Beol’s outer image evolved to suit his interests and style. He became close with the more rebellious crowd, other lost boys and girls like himself who couldn’t care less about authority or conforming to what society wanted. They spent more time in seedy pc bangs and back alleys sharing a pack of smokes than they did in school or hoping for families that would never accept them. It was around this time that he actually came out about what he really was and where he’d come from, though that identity seemed like a far off memory now. He was no longer a shade wearing the suit of a man and could freely embrace his quirkier side without worrying about anyone disapproving.

INTERVIEW QUESTION (para sample): “Just run us through what happened that night”. - Officer

This charade always amused Beol. Every time he found himself in this position, with an officer staring him down on the other side of the table in the cramped interrogation room, he wondered why their initial play was to put on this veil of ignorance. As if they didn’t already know what he did or have evidence against him. Did it actually work on suspects? He assumed that most people dug themselves into a hole trying to weave a pitiful fallacy with the same gusto as a scared child blaming the broken vase on the cat in the hopes that it would exonerate them. Beol, on the other hand, was a sophisticated liar and not burdened with the pressing need to evade something. He could phase out of the room right before their very eyes, after all. So the only reason he had to deceive them was simply because it was fun.

“Well, I can’t just start with last night, officer. That’s not how good storytelling works.” He countered coyly and rocked the chair back onto the two rear legs so he could kick his clunky boots up onto the table. Dirt and grime broke loose from the deep grooves in the sole and fell onto the open file set out before the policeman who was trying his best to see unperturbed, but Beol relished in the neigh imperceptible way his jawline tensed in annoyance. “It all began when my parents died in a tragic car accident and I was adopted by my rotten aunt and uncle. You know, they always told me my father was a drunk and that the apple wouldn’t fall far from the tree. So at least I’m exceeding someone’s expectations. Anyway, this one day, we went to the zoo for my cousin’s birthday and there was this enormous python-”

[greetings-bloodfreak]

CHAP ONE: home

aka I accidentally started writing spn fluffy one shots, and no, I do not regret it. here's the first one!

~~~~

‘Home means an enjoyable, happy place where you can live, laugh and learn. It's somewhere where you are loved, respected, and cared for. When you look at it from the outside, home is just a house. A building.’

The soft glow of the map table made Cas feel like he was basking in the light of a far off star. He slowly traced the lines that cut through the continents and oceans, the definition he'd memorised years ago rolling through his head. He never would've thought he'd find it; home that is. Hell, he never thought he deserved it.

"Babe, I finished the pancakes. They're kinda malformed but hey, that just gives them character, right?" Dean shuffled in from the kitchen, balancing two plates piled with pancakes.

"Thank you love," Cas said as Dean placed a plate down in front of him, leaving a soft kiss on his temple before he sat down with his own significantly heavier plate. He stared at the man across from him. He looked at ease. Nothing but them and their pancakes. Cas could cry with relief.

“Hey Dean.”

“Yeah?”

“How would you define home?”

“What do you mean babe?” Dean said, his stack already noticeably smaller. When Cas couldn’t seem to piece together a response he put down his fork and took Cas’ hand. “How do I define home?” Cas nodded. “Let’s see. Well, first of all, I think a house and a home are different things. Like, a house is where you live y’know? Where you sleep or where you keep your clothes and things like that. The roof you put over your head. A home is where you feel safe, at ease. So sure that could be a house but in my experience it can also be a person or even multiple people. Like take you and Sam for example, when I’m with you, hard as it might be to believe, I feel like I can take down a few walls y’know, relax a little. Now obviously Sam’s off doing that whole husband father thing with Eileen, and I don’t blame ‘em, they both deserve a little peace and quiet at the least, I think we all do.” He paused, “Y’know, for the longest time I thought it’d always just be me and Sam, I couldn’t see anyone else being willing to put up with me for more than a couple days. And then you came along and suddenly I had another person that made me feel safe, a person that I felt at home with. It scared the shit outta me Cas, cause I never thought…. I couldn’t let myself think about you like that. Losing your home hurts like hell, and losing you…. Well, we know how well I handled that. It took me so long to get over that fear, but I’m glad I did cause even though I don’t have Sam all the time anymore, it doesn't matter, cause I got you. And for what it’s worth Cas, you got me. You’ll always have me.” A kiss to Cas’ knuckle, “That make sense?”

Cas nodded. If he had been on the verge of tears before now he was actively willing them back. He stared at Dean’s hand wrapped in his own. The very same hands he’d rebuilt all those years ago. He’d grown to love Dean’s hands, love all of Dean. Every stupid joke, every nick and scar, every fibre of his being. What Dean said didn’t just make sense, it resonated with him. It was exactly how he felt with Dean. “I know what you mean,” Cas said, “You are my home Dean Winchester. Always.”

“You just had to go and make it sappy huh babe.”

“You made it sappy first, plus I still do not understand the whole ‘babe’ thing. I am substantially older than a baby.”

“Sounds like something a baby would say.”

“Babies don’t talk Dean.” Cas turned back to his plate, he squinted, “This one looks just like Australia,” he said, placing the pancake onto the country to prove it, “How did you even manage that?”

“Would you believe me if I said magic?” Dean wriggled his eyebrows. Cas snorted, Dean always had a way of lightening the mood. Even if it was through susceptible eyebrow movements. Cas watched in admiration as the love of his life continued to assign abnormal pancakes to various countries on the map.

And at that moment he finally understood the saying ‘Home is where the heart is’ cause it was true. And his heart was right here, currently ripping a pancake into two so it could fit in both Japan and New Zealand, and he’d have it no other way.

~~~~

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27990174/chapters/68557887 -> here's the ao3 link if you wanna check it out there (plus the other one shots are already up there so if you wanna go see them before I post them here be my guest!)

[spaceexp]

An Astronaut’s Tips For Living in Space – Or Anywhere

Astronaut patch / NASA - Exploration patch. March 23, 2020 One thing astronauts have to be good at: living in confined spaces for long periods of time. Here are some tips for all who find yourself in a similar scenario.

Image above: The Expedition 59 crewmembers gather for a portrait inside Japan's Kibo laboratory module. Front row from left are David Saint-Jacques, Oleg Kononenko and Anne McClain who are returning to Earth June 24. In the back are Christina Koch, Alexey Ovchinin and Nick Hague. Image Credit: NASA. Nearly 20 years successfully living on the International Space Station and more than 50 flying in space did not happen by accident. NASA astronauts and psychologists have examined what human behaviors create a healthy culture for living and working remotely in small groups. They narrowed it to five general skills and defined the associated behaviors for each skill. NASA astronauts call it “Expeditionary Behavior,” and they are part of everything we do. When it goes well, it's called “good EB.” Here are the five good expeditionary behavior skills: Skill 1, Communication Definition: Communication means to talk so you are clearly understood. To listen, and question to understand. Actively listen, pick up on non-verbal cues. Identify, discuss, then work to resolve conflict. To practice good Communication EB, share information and feelings freely. Talk about your intentions before taking action. Use proper terminology. Discuss when your or others’ actions were not as expected. Take time to debrief after success or conflict. Listen, then restate messages to ensure they are understood. Admit when you are wrong. Skill 2, Leadership/Followership Definition: How well a team adapts to changed situations. A leader enhances the group's ability to execute its purpose through positive influence. A follower (aka a subordinate leader) actively contributes to the leader’s direction. Establish an environment of trust. To practice good Leadership/Followership EB, accept responsibility. Adjust your style to your environment. Assign tasks and set goals. Lead by example. Give direction, information, feedback, coaching and encouragement. Ensure your teammates have resources. Talk when something isn’t right. Ask questions. Offer solutions, not just problems. Skill 3, Self-Care Definition: Self-Care means keeping track of how healthy you are on psychological and physical levels. It includes hygiene, managing your time and your stuff, getting sleep, and maintaining your mood. Through self-care, you demonstrate your ability to be proactive to stay healthy. To practice good Self-Care EB, realistically assess your own strengths and weaknesses, and their influence on the group. Learn from mistakes. Identify personal tendencies and their influence on your success or failure. Be open about your weaknesses and feelings. Take action to mitigate your own stress or negativity (don't pass it on to the group). Be social. Seek feedback. Balance work, rest, and personal time. Be organized. Skill 4, Team Care Definition: Team Care is how healthy the group is on psychological, physical and logistical levels. Recognize that this can be influenced by stress, fatigue, sickness, supplies, resources, workload, etc. Nurture optimal team performance despite challenges. To practice good Team Care EB, demonstrate patience and respect. Encourage others. Monitor your team for signs of stress or fatigue. Encourage participation in team activities. Develop positive relationships. Volunteer for the unpleasant tasks. Offer and accept help. Share credit; take the blame. Skill 5, Group Living Definition: Group Living skills are how people cooperate and become a team to achieve a goal. Identify and manage different opinions, cultures, perceptions, skills and personalities. Demonstrate resilience in the face of difficulty. To practice good Group Living EB, cooperate rather than compete. Actively cultivate group culture (use each individual's culture to build the whole). Respect roles, responsibilities and workload. Take accountability; give praise freely. Then work to ensure a positive team attitude. Keep calm in conflict. You can be successful in confinement if you are intentional about your actions and deliberate about caring for your team. When we work together, we will continue to be #EarthStrong. Editor's Note: Adapted from a Twitter Thread by astronaut Anne McClain. Related links: Humans in Space: https://www.nasa.gov/topics/humans-in-space International Space Station: http://www.nasa.gov/station Moon to Mars: https://www.nasa.gov/topics/moon-to-mars/ Image (mentioned), Text, Credits: NASA/Kelli Mars. Greetings, Orbiter.ch Full article

[dont-feel-like-boys]

idk how to say this but hayley kiyoko was revealed to be ableist. i have proof if you’d like it but all you really need to do is search “hayley kiyoko ableism” on twitter

i have read so much about this situation. including her two (shitty, yes) apologies. and yeah, she did not handle the situation well at all. neither did the security guards. neither did the abled fans at the concert. the only people who did what they were supposed to were the disabled fans getting their experience ruined. i know. 

her response was suuuuper shitty during the concert, her first apology shouldn’t even be considered one, but she explained repeatedly that she was ignorant of the situation. she was rude to the fans when they tried to explain during the concert, so yeah, i’m definitely not defending her actions, but it’s not so black and white (nothing ever is), because there are larger issues at play here and context is key. (note: the following is in no way a defense of her actions but rather a summary of why the situation should never have happened and why it isn’t entirely hayley’s fault):

1) yes, the venue has the necessary disability seating; why is this seating at the back of a venue up on a balcony instead of the front? this is a systemic issue that proves the devaluation of disabled people. not hayley’s fault. what is her fault is that she didn’t know her venue; she clearly didn’t choose a venue with disabled folks in mind nor was she briefed by her team or the venue about where her disabled fans would be. she should have had this information, but the situation shouldn’t have even happened in the first place. the disabled seating shouldn’t be in the back. i’m not gonna fault hayley for wanting her fans to stand though; would you want a balcony of fans sitting down at a concert you were performing at?

2) the lack of communication; how was hayley supposed to hear the guard or the disabled fans in the audience over the screams of fans? i doubt the venue ever got silent/quiet, even when hayley was trying to rectify the situation. why was nobody sent to actually communicate with hayley and explain the situation; the guard probably needed to remain in his assigned position, but there had to have been someone at that venue able to go onstage and talk to hayley and let her know why the guard was doing what he was (which was what he was supposed to be doing) and why she shouldn’t be asking people to stand. this should’ve been communicated to her before the concert even started (and she should’ve taken it upon herself to make herself knowledgeable of the venue before even booking it) but there had to have been a better way of taking care of it than “trying to explain” aka yelling over a venue full of concert-goers from a fucking balcony and then maintaining the idea that hayley knew what she was doing during the concert. she didn’t. she was entirely ignorant of what was wrong.

3) during the concert, she was only mad at the guard for shining his light in people’s faces, which yeah. is super fucking shitty. those people paid their 60 euro for their tickets too. while they were clearly fine with remaining seated for the disabled people before hayley brought anything up, as far as she’s concerned, she’s performing and all of a sudden people are getting needlessly harassed by a guard. it wasn’t needless, since he was trying to get their attention and explain why they should be sitting, but hayley had no knowledge of that (which yes, she should’ve known) furthermore, the guard needing to shine his light in people’s faces in order to get their attention shows how loud the venue was. how do you expect hayley to have heard the guard or the fans’ explanations if the guard can’t even verbally tell people to sit down without first getting their attention by flashing a light in their eyes. which also?! isn’t good to do AT ALL to anyone but what if someone with light sensitivity or epilepsy had experienced that? people with low-maintenance vision problems can have light sensitivity issues so....

4) it’s entirely not the responsibility of the disabled people to inform their peers or hayley of their needs; they should’ve been met regardless. but what, did the fans in front of the disabled section not see the disabled people behind them? did they not connect the dots when there were disabled people trying to communicate with hayley at the front of the balcony? were they such ableist assholes that not even a single one of them heard anything that they or the guard was saying and pass it along? did not even a single abled person care?

now, i get it. what hayley did was wrong. her apologies weren’t that great, and the fans 100% deserve and are obligated to receive a refund. she should’ve known where her disabled fans were sitting and the whole debacle should’ve never happened. but her disabled fans shouldn’t have even been in those specific seats; the disabled section shouldn’t be in an area easily obscured by others, nor should it be in the back of any section or balcony. why the hell was it even on an upper floor?

but cancel culture fucking sucks y’all. i used to be anti-abortion and conservative, so i guess every feminist should unfollow me even though i’m a leftist now. growth is like totally impossible, and no one can ever change ever.

while her second apology (a whole year and a half after the situation) isn’t great either, she clearly explains how she was ignorant. i’m not gonna cancel her over ignorance. our response to ignorance shouldn’t be canceling but educating.

that said, i don’t blame anyone who doesn’t want to listen to her music, and i don’t blame anyone who has stopped listening or supporting her. i’m going to take down the post that i think led to this ask, because while i personally am not canceling her, i won’t continue actively supporting her, since i do understand why that situation was so fucked up.

anon, thank you for reaching out. 

i’m sorry if this isn’t the response merited. let me know if there’s any way it could and should be better. tell me why i’m wrong. tell me if i’ve fucked up.

[solange-lol]

abc, 123, baby you and me

SolangeloWeek Day 5 - Age Regression/Kidfic

Words: 2517

Special thanks to Val aka @jayjay-graceless and Annie aka @bookplush for those absolutely genius names within their robot child 

Read on Ao3

There wasn’t ever anything for Nico di Angelo to look forward to in sex ed, especially in a public high school. He supposed they should be lucky to get any sort of education at all, but the 40 minute period every day was just another reference to their heteronormative society. If they had to learn about every single type of birth control, it would be nice to at least cover some sort of protection for same-sex couples. It’s not even like his sexuality or his relationship with Will was a secret. 

 Even the ‘study games’ were cruel. One game involved them putting post-its on their back with words either relating to male or female genitalia, and they had to guess what it was using ‘yes’ or ‘no’ questions. If it weren’t for Frank (bless him) choosing to savor his embarrassment and reminding him about it, Nico would have been walking around with ‘penis’ on his back for the rest of the day. (He still doesn’t think the rest of their friends forgive him for catching him before he walked out of the room). 

However, there was always one unit that everyone always looked forward to near the end of the year: their parenthood unit. After years of trying (and failing) to reign the disaster of using eggs or sacks of flour as their ‘children’, the school implanted actual robotic babies into the system specifically for this unit. Their final grade of the semester was determined along a week of taking care of the robotic baby, which would track whether or not they mishandled the baby in a way that would upset an actual living, breathing child. The catch is it would be done in partnerships.

The moment their teacher announced it, Nico looked right at Will, who wiggled his eyebrows. Nico gave Will a quick nod in response. He noticed for a second that Piper and Annabeth were eyeing him warily before looking at each other in a mutual agreement about something, but he chose to ignore it. Of course he was going to choose Will for this project. 

When their teacher finally called for their groups to get together, Will immediately moved to sit next to Nico. The two glanced around, seeing who else paired up. Some of them were obvious from known friendships, while others seemed to be a have-nobody-else-to-partner-with type situation. One of the most unfortunate situations was Frank Zhang, his sister’s boyfriend; Hazel was in the class under them, which left Frank to be paired with one of the Stoll brothers. Nico was lucky to be in a class with his boyfriend and a lot of his friends, otherwise, he probably would have ended up like that.

 Annabeth and Piper had paired together, which was a surprise to Nico as both of their boyfriends were in the class. However, judging by the harmless death glares and teasing, Jason and Percy seemed to have turned this entire assignment into a competition against the girls. Nico just rolled his eyes at them; the overly dramatic bromance between both groups was too much for him at times.

Next to him, Will was already chattering excitedly. 

“I’ve been coming up with names while she was talking,” he said, pulling a folder from his backpack. “I’m thinking something extravagant. Maybe Percival or Wulfric for a boy, and Celestia or Antoinette for a girl.” He glanced down the list again. “Oh! Wellington is also a good one! Or Febreeze-”

“We aren’t naming it,” Nico said, shutting the folder with a laugh. It was funny how everyone expected Nico to be more flamboyant as the fully gay one, but sometimes he felt like his bisexual boyfriend came right from playing Kurt Hummel in Glee.

Will pouted for a second before he continued. “My mom told me at the beginning of the year when we got the permission slip for this assignment that you would be able to stay whichever night to make it easier on us. Or I can stay at your house, whatever you want.” Nico just nodded along, a small smile forming on his face. Who knew a stupid sex ed assignment would be an excuse to spend all week with his boyfriend. 

Will left to get their robot baby from the teacher, and Annabeth immediately slid into his place.

“I don’t think you should do this project with Will,” she said. Nico’s head immediately snapped up from the sheet of instructions, eyes narrowing.

“Give me one good reason.”

“Oh, I’ll give you multiple reasons. Do you know how much strain a baby will put on a marriage, much less a regular relationship? Especially when you're in high school. And have you ever spent more than a weekend with Will? It says you’re supposed to try and take care of the baby together as much as possible. You don’t know how long you can stand him for. Your patience is already going to be strained enough.”

Nico’s eyes shifted, avoiding her stormy gray ones staring him down. “None of those are good reasons,” he mumbled.

Annabeth sighed, finally letting her arms drop to the desk rather than in their crossed position. “Look, there’s a reason I’m not even doing it with Percy, and we’ve been dating for nearly two years-”

“Isn’t this supposed to be, like, the true test though?” He cut her off. “See if we could actually handle being around each other every day, or if we would be good with children?” He wouldn’t ever admit it, not even to himself yet, but Nico could honestly see himself spending the rest of his life with Will. (It was too terrifying to think about so usually he chose not to.)

“What you and Will have is good, Nico, I’m not denying that,” she pushed. “I just don’t want it to be ruined. Not when you’ve gotten this far.”

Nico sighed. He hated that she had a point. If he had an existential crisis surrounding his relationship with Will in the next week, he was blaming it entirely on her.

“I think you’d have to kill him to not do this project with me,” he said, rolling his eyes in an attempt to shake off his hesitance. 

Before she could respond, Will came bounding back, and all the doubt Annabeth had planted in his mind was momentarily forgotten. Because even though it was obviously made out of plastic (and oh goodness, those eyes were terrifyingly empty) his heart melted a little bit at the sight of his boyfriend with a baby in his arms. 

“Go get back to your own kid,” Nico said, shoving her out of the chair. She gave him the stink eye before returning to Piper; their baby had already started emitting a robotic cry somehow. 

“Are you okay?” Will asked, and the gleeful tone in his voice before had disappeared. “Whatever she said to you seemed pretty upsetting.” 

Nico smiled, and thankfully it didn’t feel fake. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m good.”

And just like that, regular old Will was back. “Great! Because I figured out the perfect name for her.” Nico raised an eyebrow at him, but he continued anyway. “Delphina Oregano Galavine,”

“Its initials are D-O-G. You named it Dog.” Nico stated.

“di Angelo-Solace,” Will added hastily.

“Nope, too late. I’m calling it Dog."

***

As it turns out, Dog (yes, Nico was seriously calling it that) wasn’t actually that difficult to take care of in school. They were given their babies that Friday morning and were required to take care of it up until Monday. All the teachers were aware of the project, so most of them went easy on their students. 

He says most, as his history teacher thought it would be hilarious to give presentations that day. Thankfully, Will had taken Dog to his class, so Nico was allowed to present in peace, while others had to try and rely on their friends or anyone around them to watch their baby. Nothing like trying to present on American history while a couple teenagers tried to frantically silence any robotic crying. 

It was the start of that weekend when the chaos of parenthood really started. Nico blames the whole thing on Will and his poor judgment, to be honest. 

They had a plan to meet up at Will’s house on Saturday after Nico got off of work. Instead, Will showed up at Nico’s work. With the baby. 

Will tried to play it off like he was just a casual shopper, browsing the aisles with a robotic baby in tow. Whatever effect it may have had on other shoppers, though, it did not have the same one on him. Nico’s cheeks were heating up as he approached his manager in the back.

“You have to kick him out,” Nico pleaded to Reyna. 

“Why? He’s not doing anything wrong,” she seemed unfazed by the whole situation.

Nico gaped at her. “He’s holding a robotic child.” 

“Your robotic child, might I remind you. And that’s not even the strangest thing we’ve seen here.” (That part was true; retail was wacky). “Besides, isn’t it like, kinda romantic that he came to visit you with your child?” 

Nico glared at her, but she glared right back before instructing him to get back to work. He took that as an invitation to go over to Will. “What the hell are you doing here?” Nico hissed at him.

Will jumped, nearly dropping the baby in his arms. Nico was so thankful he didn’t; they were lucky it was sleeping right now. The only thing worse than this current situation was if the baby was fussy right now. (Although, that could get Will kicked out, which wouldn’t be all that bad).

“Oh, hey Nico!” he smiled. “I got bored just lying around at home, and I think she did too.” He hoisted the baby higher up in his arm so he had a better grip around her. 

“But why did you bring it out in public?” 

Will’s brow furrowed. “What, did you just expect to hide away at home for an entire weekend?” 

“Yeah, kind of!” Nico gritted his teeth.

“Is that how you would treat a real child?”

“No, but-”

“So why would you treat this one any different?”

“Because that’s not a real child, Will!” He didn’t mean for it to come out as harsh as it did, but Will looked more angry than sad.

“Are you embarrassed to be with me?” he asked flatly, and Nico felt his heart break a little bit. 

“No, I’m not embarrassed by you, Will. I could never be, even when you do something worth being embarrassed for. Nor would I be embarrassed to be with you with an actual child,” Will looked relieved at that, but Nico wasn’t finished. “I am embarrassed by that-” he pointed to the doll in Will’s arms. “-though. It freaks me out, and I think it’s freaking other people out.”

Will looked around like it was the first time he noticed that he was in a public setting with a robot baby in his arms. “Oh,” he said, glancing at a few confused shoppers as they passed. “I’ll just- I’m gonna go” he ducked his head as his cheeks heated up, and Nico felt bad for him.

“Hold on,” Nico grabbed his arm. “Just stay there for a second, I’m going to go ask Reyna for the rest of the afternoon off.”

***

If Nico remembered correctly, there was one benefit that came from being able to spend his weekend at Will’s house for this project. It was Sunday, though, and they had yet to take advantage of that benefit. 

Dog was sleeping in the corner on the weird makeshift-bed of pillows Will had put together on top of his dresser. Will’s actual dog, a golden retriever named Sunny (Will had named her when he was 5), had been taken by Naomi to a vet appointment. His half-sister, Kayla, was out shopping with friends, and his half-brother, Austin, was at work. Which meant Will and Nico were home alone. With no distractions.

Currently, they were sitting across from each other on Will’s bed, studying for their upcoming math test. Nico knew he probably needed to actually work on his study guide (he hardly paid any attention in math anyway, after their teacher made the mistake of letting him and Will sit next to each other, that class was entirely them goofing off in the back) but instead he leaned over and kissed Will on the cheek. Will looked up from the problem he was working on for a second and gave Nico a quick kiss, before taking Nico’s hand with his free one and going back to work.

That wasn’t working for Nico, though, so he yanked on his hand, pulling the Will toward him. Thankfully, Will complied, dropping the textbook and paper on his lap in favor of leaning down to kiss Nico. He ended up pulling Nico down on top of him, so they were laying back on his bed. 

Nico tore his lips away from Will’s and kissed along his jaw and down his neck as he pushed the flannel that Will was wearing off his shoulders. He sat up for a second, straddling Will’s hips as he tugged his shirt over his head as Will did the same with his own. He leaned back down, pressing his bare chest to Will’s as he went back to work on the skin around Will’s collarbone. 

Will’s eyes rolled back, fluttering before shutting completely as he gasped and sighed before pulling Nico back up to kiss him on the lips once again.

Nico was about to reach for Will’s jeans when a robotic cry echoed throughout the room, causing both boys to groan in annoyance

“I’m gonna turn off that stupid thing,” Nico mumbled into Will’s neck. 

“I wouldn’t argue with that.”

***

Nico and Will stood in front of a desk the next day, Dog laying quietly on top as their teacher clicked through her laptop

“Congrats, boys, you guys got an A-,” their teacher said before moving onto the next group. Will sighed in relief.

Immediately, he walked over to Piper and Annabeth’s table to gloat. “Suck it, Chase,” he grinned. “We were fantastic parents.”

“We still got a higher grade than you,” Annabeth pointed out. “But I have to say, I’m impressed. I don’t think I would have done that well with Percy. I guess you were right,” she sounded pained as she said it, and Nico gloated.

Walking back to his desk, Will was staring blankly at the baby. 

“I think I’m gonna miss her,” he said.

Nico considered it for a second. “I think I’m going to miss having an excuse to sleep over at your house.”

“Yeah, about that. Apparently, you left a very visible mark on my neck, and Lou Ellen and I do not have the same skin tone,” Will said, then asked: “So, when do you want kids?” 

Nico glared at him with no real anger behind his eyes, slapping him playfully on the arm. “Don’t get ahead of yourself, there.”

~~~

Thanks for reading! Taglist under cut (message me to be added/removed)

@internallyexplodingrainbows @aleclight-ofmylife-wood @unicornsgomooo @anxiouswinter @soulangelou @number-of-fucks-i-give-0 @underworldystuff @theeloquentsnake @solangelover@thefandomsaretakingover @internallyexplodingrainbows @hairasuntouchedaspartoftheamazon @motivatedcryptidtamer @emilyfairchild @wherethewildthingsare-nt @my-face-is-a-potato 

[natashabarnes]

To preface:  Avengers: Endgame shook me to my core and I needed to find a constructive, healthy way to talk about what I am feeling and this seemed as good a way as any. This is an endeavor seeking emotional intelligence. So I’m here to talk about how media can affect us, honest-to-goodness grief, and yeah sure, my opinions and most importantly, Natasha Romanoff. There will be spoilers, obviously. You’ve been warned.

It’s late afternoon on Friday, May 7th, 2010.  I’m a super-soon-to-be-college-graduate, and I’ve just missed my bus home.  There are few places grimmer than where I currently found myself: the Inter-City Bus Terminal in Reading, Pennsylvania. The good news was that buses from Reading to New York ran roughly every two or three hours most of the day, I was going to be fine. I was going to be late, but I was going to be fine.  At the risk of sounding dramatic, I didn’t know it but I had a date with destiny that evening. Since I couldn’t imagine sitting around and waiting in a bleak af bus terminal, I sought refuge a mere block-and-a-half away at the R/C Reading Movies 11 & IMAX. Lucky for me, I was able to schlep my suitcase and (always) large purse over right in time for a showing of Iron Man 2. I remembered Iron Man (2008) to be a whole lot of fun so I sprung for a movie ticket to be able to watch most of Iron Man 2 before I had to catch my bus.  I knew nothing about this film going in and I was having a good time up until the moment Scarlett Johansson came on screen as Natalie Rushman (who even me, a noob S.H.I.E.L.D./espionage sector of Marvel, knew was actually Natasha Romanoff, aka the Black Widow).  Once she made her entrance into Tony Stark’s personal fitness center, I wasn’t having a good time, I was having a great time…and also a weird time.  I was in complete awe of her; I hung on her every word, her every move.  Everything about her radiated a sense of intelligence, purpose, intention, and most alluring to me, confidence.  Looking back I realize I was seeing the kind of woman I wanted to be; not only did she have every trait I wanted as a person, she seemed to be this unattainable personified perfection.  At the time, I wrote off my fascination with her pretty quickly as the voice in my head said “but you’ll never be like that, you know that, right? You’ll never have those things.” I had to leave to catch my bus just as Rhodey showed up to Justin Hammer’s Stark Expo presentation and at the time that was pretty much that.

Let’s skip ahead.  It’s the evening of Wednesday, April 24th, 2019.  Thanks to the kindness of my best friend/basically sister, I was able to see Avengers: Endgame a day early.  I’m a mess.  I’m soaking wet from the collar bone up and my eye makeup is every place on my face with the exception of my eyes.  I’ve been sitting for over three hours and somehow I’m out of breath, my sweat is cold. My status of Full Blown Mess was credited to the fact that I had to watch Natasha Romanoff die violently, fiercely, and courageously.  The shock I felt that night was all-consuming.  I kept saying to my friend through hard sobs, “I just thought she’d be safe. I really thought she’d be safe.”  So many people I know at this event found me after the fact to check in with me.  Am I okay? Do I need anything?  The only answer I came up with on the fly was “I will be, it hurts now. But I’m just…so proud of her.”  More on that later, but basically, people were so kind and if I had to be a mess, at least I was among people who also cared and understood where I was coming from. While my friend engaged in a last bit of work for the day, I sat waiting, attempting to calm down by staring at costume designer Jany Temime’s recent Instagram post where she selfied with Scarlett expressing excitement about working on the upcoming Black Widow film. I reminded myself that this night was not goodbye, just a very jarring “see ya later.”  Of course the present is not necessarily made easier to bear just because more (and potentially the best) is yet to come.

What a difference nine years made.  I’d gone from casual move-going fan who’d only read Spider-Man comics when I had time to being a hardcore, ride-or-die fan of Marvel Comics and the Marvel Cinematic Universe. My library had grown exponentially, along with my knowledge of these characters, and let’s not overlook my closet’s growth after falling into the deep pit of cosplay. I can’t exactly put my finger on the “when” of it, but at some point I stopped stifling the portion of my heart that belonged to superheroes and let them take over with complete abandon.  I’d always had a heavy habit of trying to be what other people wanted me to be.  Though I may have lived very independently, in retrospect my choices and interests were so often chosen for the satisfaction of other people (I am not assigning blame to anyone but myself on this one). Superheroes serve as a perfect example of a passion of mine I chose to shut down for so long. Once I leaned into that passion, I felt so much more complete.  It’s no surprise that Natasha Romanoff was the character I ended up being most passionate about.  

Natasha is a strong woman who spent a lot of her life in the service of others across moral and political spectrums.  She followed their orders always and has plenty of regrets about her past.  Maybe I was self-projecting, but throughout my dedicated years as an MCU viewer and Black Widow comic reader, I always saw Natasha’s arc as two parts:

1) a woman coming to terms with what she’s been and what she’s done seeking to move forward in a more universally beneficial direction.

2)  a woman learning who she is, what she wants and choosing to act of her own volition.

Obviously the two are deeply connected. While her past experiences may have made her moral compass more grey than that of her peers, she’s a woman who wants the Right Thing To Do to be the choice she makes of her own agency.  There’s a beautiful deleted scene from Captain America: The Winter Soldier where Nat speaks to Nick Fury for the first time in confidence after discovering he faked his death and did not include in on the secret.  “I needed to keep the circle small.  You would have done the same thing,” he says.  “I know,” she replies, “that’s a problem.”  A scene she has with Steve Rogers discussing trust that made the final cut achieves a similar idea.  In past appearances in the MCU, Natasha had expressed a desire to make amends for her past and seemingly had started to do so through her work with S.H.I.E.L.D. and her participation the Battle of New York.  These moments in Cap2, as the fandom frequently refers to it fondly, are less about her outward actions and more about her inward struggles. What she seems to learn by the end of the film is that letting people in is a key part of her goal of a truer sense of self.  By the time we meet her in Captain America: Civil War, within the first hour of the film she delivers one of my favorite quotes as the family around her begins to split apart, “Staying together is more important than how we stay together.”  Nat’s journey continued to be one of finding self-possession, self worth and using that greater sense of self to give back to others, both the found family around her and the innocent she can protect.  

With all of this in mind, Avengers: Endgame is my favorite MCU film and features my favorite Natasha Romanoff content we’ve seen so far.  From the moment the film begins, she is a woman hell-bent on remedying the greatest tragedy in the history of the world.  Long gone is the woman we met in her first two films who did the bidding of an organization and/or focused mainly on giving back to those she felt she owed. In Endgame, Natasha aims to save the world, to bring back everyone lost, to restore families.  We first see this when she agrees to find Thanos with the team and reverse the snap. When that mission fails, we skip ahead five years and that’s when I personally really lost it. In five years, Natasha has never stopped trying to fix the world. Let’s be clear, every other member of the original six Avengers most definitely has stopped trying to find an antidote to The Thanos Problem.  Sure, Steve is trying to fix things in a different, more practical way, but there’s still an acceptance of the circumstances in his actions.  The sight of her alone broke my heart and filled me with a sense of honor.  This is a woman we have always seen in control and put together and when we find her she is a noble, beautiful wreck. She’s abandoned most self care, wearing only her depression clothes, and surviving off hope and peanut butter sandwiches desperately communicating with allies around the universe. These people make time for her but are clearly losing patience with her and her insistence that not only can this be fixed, but that it is all of their responsibility to do so.  And in case it wasn’t obvious enough how much she’s changed, this scene gives us what I believe will be (for now at least) Nat’s most iconic moment on screen.  “I used to have nothing, and then I got this…this job, this family.  And I was better because of it.  And even though they’re gone…I’m still trying to be better.”  Nat sums up her entire character arc in this one delicate and stunning moment showing just how strong allowing herself to be vulnerable has made her.  Loving has only made her braver, caring has only made her more tenacious, and giving has made her unstoppable.  She is, in this moment, the woman she always wanted to become.

Remembering the aforementioned scene is absolutely necessary when absorbing Natasha’s choice later in the movie to sacrifice her life so that her team can get the soul stone.  Her entire life has lead her to this moment. Yes, killing off the only female from your original team is a bold move with a LOT of weight attached to it, and one that can definitely be seen as shortchanging her, but I just can’t see it that way. Natasha Romanoff made the ultimate heroic choice, one that the rest of the film hinges on.  My brain can’t navigate the concept that fans have been robbed of her unnecessarily without also hearing a diminishing of the selfless choice she made and the course she followed in the time we’ve known her and beyond.  It’s only when I think of the alternate concept of Clint dying for the soul stone that I feel completely, hypothetically swindled (though while we’re talking about him let’s also not forget how excellent it was to see a man and a woman with no blood relation platonically love one another unconditionally).  Please don’t misunderstand, if you are angry, I respect that, we all deal with stuff different ways, this is just my take.  Natasha Romanoff earned that moment.  Is it devastating to watch? One thousand percent yes, but what I felt even more deeply than the devastation was pride.  I am so proud of this character that in no way can I bring myself to see this choice as abuse or mistreatment of her character.  In that moment, she was magnificent.  Natasha Romanoff died valiantly, unafraid, and of her own free will so that everyone else could live.  Natasha is a hero of the highest standard, full stop.

Entertainment Weekly recently featured a half-hour interview with the original six Avengers to promote Endgame. I was more than moved to hear Scarlett speak about Nat’s arc and confirm what I’d been absorbing as an audience member for years.  “She’s come into her own as a woman saying ‘who am I and what do I want and what do I need out of my relationships and also out of my own self’ and she’s someone who is understanding her own self worth.”  Without going into deep detail, watching Scarlett’s performance as Natasha has affected me in a way I can only describe as profound.  Every MCU film she appeared in had at least one moment that hit a nerve inside me in ways equally gentle and harsh, but still every nerve was hit with the reassurance of knowing that if she could change, I could too.  Catalysts for personal growth can come from anywhere and at my most lost somehow I remembered that moment sitting in a theatre watching Iron Man 2.  Something in my brain told me to follow that feeling I had watching her, not in an effort to emulate her completely, but to see an example of someone one who is “my own woman–first, last and always.”  Natasha taught me that self love, self worth and opening yourself to others are traits more powerful than lightning, stronger than a suit of armor and they’d protect me more than a shield.  In the years I’ve watched and read this character, my life has changed for the better in every way.  She’s been a gift to me and the gratitude I feel is overwhelming.  I may have saved myself, but Natasha taught me how.  As fans I think we all love having more media to look forward to, especially when that media features an inspirational figure for us.  Before Endgame I’d frequently have passing thoughts reminding me that someday the time of Scarlett’s particular incarnation of Natasha will be over.  Who would I be without this character? After Endgame, I’m less afraid of that future.  No matter what form of this character I will have in my life, I will always follow her example and I will try to be better.