#aj's fics

[ladyofthecreeddraws]

Might've been reading @shineforthee's "in the deafening polar province called You", who's to say...

This is from chapter 18.

And full here ofc <3

[betareki]

Reunited!

From @uhohbestie ‘s TAMN!!! I’ve been obsessed with this fic for months and been meaning to draw fanart for forever! The idea that it’s gonna end soon is sooooo heartbreaking </33 Genuinely my favorite in the history of forever!!

Fun fact I read Ch 5 while waiting for Mitski to go live back in April and it left me so shocked I couldn’t stop thinking about it the entire show LMAOMAO

Thank you niko oomf for the scene suggestion <33 Can’t wait to read the rest of the fic together!!

[idorelyss]

LATE NIGHT TALKS | LEILA OUAHABI X EXWIFE.ᐟREADER

summary. all leila wants to do is talk after an outing.

author notes. this is just a blurb.. i'm working on the fic that won that poll, no worries 🙏🏾 just wanted to give yall a taste of leila and reader's dynamic. enjoy!

contains. just leila being downbad, ex wives being ex wives, tension (?).

the radio is low, marco is sleeping soundly in the backside, the manchester streets are flying past you. there is a feeling of fatigue settling into your body, but your mind feels content after today so you ignore it. thankfully (or not thankfully if anyone asked you), you aren't the one driving tonight,

leila is in the driver's seat, eyes focused on the road. this would feel like any typical night if it was a half a year ago, but it's now. you two aren't married anymore. sitting in her passenger seat feels too intimate now. reminds you too much of previous nights. back then, her hand would be on your thigh, rubbing small circles over the fabric of your pants or sometimes your bare thigh, depending on what you were wearing.

that warm weight is gone now. even though you both know leila wants it there.. and maybe you do too. you don't even know anymore.

the closer and closer you guys get to your house, the more antsy you could tell leila was getting. after nine years of a relationship, you obviously know leila like the back of your hand. she keeps glancing over at you like there are words on her tongue, waiting to be said. she bites the inside of her cheek a few times.

leila is dying to say something, it's so obvious.

as she pulls onto your street, she licks her lips. once parked infront of the house, leila leans back in her seat. her hand moves to unbuckle her seatbelt before cutting the radio off. marco stirs slightly in the backside, but ultimately stays sleep.

you glance at her with a questioning look. there's some tension lingering and you don't dare to address it.

"did you enjoy yourself? being around your friends with me there.. it must had felt weird. i saw the way they were looking at me and you," leila says quietly, looking ahead, out the window, at the neighborhood.

you let out a sigh at her words. so considerate but those words hit you way harder than they should. the alarm bells going off in the eyes of your friends, when you brought leila along with marco and you for one of your close friends' daughter's birthday party, were so evident. leila techinally wasn't even supposed to come, but your car was in the shop and she had to drive marco and you to the playplace and then marco didn't want her to leave so she ended up just coming into the playplace with you two.

it's not weird that leila, you, and marco were out together, but usually, you guys are alone during those outings. not at a party together where your friends (who supported you throughout the divorce) were at.

"i did. marco was so happy you stayed-" you look over at her, "and i know my friends were looking at you all heated, but they mean well, i swear. i hope you enjoyed yourself, too, regardless of that."

leila looks at you, "i did. i like seeing marco happy and.. i like seeing you happy too-"

"leila-" you try to stop her from continuing whatever other words are about to come out of her mouth, but it can't be helped.

"i miss you so much. i miss our family. we should be in our house right now cuddling while marco sleeps away in his room but no, i'm dropping you guys off and then going to drive back to my flat," leila pushes past your attempt to stop her. after spending the whole day with you and marco, it's just made her think about how much she's missing being away from you. not in a physical sense but in an emotional sense. she wishes she was attending that birthday party alongside you and marco as your wife, not your ex.

leila's words don't surprise you. it's not news to you that she wants you back, but you just can't deal with this right now.

you frown. "we divorced for a reason. it's no point of thinking about what we use to have. we should focus on how well our arrangement is doing right now."

those words feel so false coming out of your mouth, but you force them out anyway. your heart is beating so fast.

still, leila doesn't back down. why would she? the divorce was never her idea.

"well? i don't think it's going well. when i go home and lay in bed at night, all i can think about is you," she says, "my home isn't even home. it's with you and marco, here."

god, leila always had a way with words.

you put a hand over your face to calm your mind. leila was laying it on thick.

"things change.. home can be anywhere. you just aren't looking hard enough," you say. alittle harsh, but you need to create some distance.

a flash of hurt hits leila's features before she reaches her hand over the console and grabs your free hand.

"you don't mean that. i love you. there is nowhere else for me. please, please, take me back."

how can you reject her when she acts like this?

the i love you almost makes you say something that would take back the whole divorce. too bad that's an almost.

her hand feels so warm in yours and so familiar and so comforting but at the same time derailing the entire process you went through to get over the divorce.

so you pull away.

"i got to get marco into the house.. he has school tomorrow. goodnight, leila," you say before pushing her hand away, grabbing your purse and phone, and getting out of the car. there's clear hurt in leila's face as she watches you shut the door.

she gets out of the car too, moving to open the backseat door and get marco out. she holds the seven year old easily like she always does. the dark-haired boy wakes up a little as leila walks up to the front door of your house, following you.

"mmh.. mommy?" he murmurs out. you pout slightly at his adoreableness while you unlock the front door.

"go back to sleep, baby," leila says, walking into the house after you. marco is already back sleep by the end of her sentence.

you shut the door before going off to put your things down and change. while leila goes to marco's bedroom to put him down to sleep.

a few minutes later, you two are back at the front door. you're standing there in your pajamas while she leans against the door. there's a uncomfortable silence between you two.

"goodnight again, leila," you break the silence. she gives you a small smile that you know is one of sadness.

"goodnight.. can i get a goodbye hug?" she asks.

you should really say no. especially after rejecting her in the car, but that fact is sorta pulling you to agree.

"okay."

you open up your arms, and she immediately falls into them. she goes right into a position that is familiar to you two; her hands going up and down your back while her face is in your neck. it's way too easy to fall back into what used to be usual as your arms go around her neck.

the hug lasts for way too long, and she starts softly swaying with you and makes you step back a few steps before it ends.

"you know i love you," she says right as she pulls away. you don't even know what to say, so you stay silent as she leaves out of the door.

author notes. adding onto the lore! yes, reader and leila were together for nine years before divorcing. ofc they weren't married for the whole nine years. this fic is set in mid-ish 2024 so figure out the divorce timeline if you want. also yes, marco is seven years old (at least at the time of this fic.. his age may change depending on what year a fic takes place). so yeah, hope this was good! 💖

[kikker-oma]

Fan Joy July - Day 26

What's the Opposite of Tunnel Vision? By @enjolras-out is freaking - RAAAAAAAHH

SO good. SO TENSE! Lots of whump and ooohhh wild throwing Hyrule out of the way and taking the damage himself?! SELF SACRIFICE BELOVED.

Read this if you love whump!! Mind the tags🥰🥰

[spaceorphan18]

Alright. So. This is a thing that happened....

I... maybe have written my first real X-Men - Rogue/Gambit fic. Inspired by an interview X-Men 97 Gambit Voice Actor did. And then, it got posted to Twitter. And then said Gambit Voice Actor reblogged it, READ IT, and commented.

I am so... shellshocked you guys. I cannot believe this happened. I just... I was shaking when I found out today. This is wild and amazing and I'm so flattered and wow. I just can't even believe it.

I have literally been smiling all day.

<3

[dawn-speckled]

his mother died when he was seven. he blamed himself. his father told him it was his fault. his father was drunk driving. his father was his responsibility. that's probably why mark still lives with him. he has anger issues. he talks about being ignored as being made to "feel small". he grew up with an alcoholic father. both of his parents made fun of him since he was a baby. his only other father figure is a priest. he knew he wanted to marry his girlfriend as soon as he saw her. she loves her family unconditionally while he's trying to escape his own.

[bxeckersz]

hickeys | Kate Martin x Female!reader

summary: y/n and kate have a good time but unfortunately y/n gets carried away and the team notices

warnings: p eating (kate receiving), language, making out

a/n: i’m not that good at smut guys, bare w me 😭.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

“Fuck” Kate moans as Y/n kisses down her neck. She tilts her head, giving Y/n easier access. “So needy, hm” Y/n says against her neck.

“Y/n, cmon. I need you” Kate whispers. “Patience, baby.” Y/n says, kissing down her legs leaving hickeys as she goes.

“Y/n, stop fucking with me, dude.” Kate says, her tone husky. “shh” Y/n hums against Kate’s thigh, making her way to Kate’s inner thigh, closer to Kate’s pussy.

“please” Kate pleads. By now, her chest, neck, thighs, and legs are covered in hickeys. Y/n knows that Kate is gonna get pissed at her but she doesn’t care.

“Y/n, cmon m-“ Kate starts before Y/n attaches her plump lips to Kates dripping pussy, licking and sucking.

“Oh, fuck” Kate moans, attaching her hand to the back of Y/n’s head, making Y/n go faster.

“Taste so good” Y/n mutters against Kate, Y/n’s talking sending vibrations against Kate’s pussy.

“Right there, keep going” Kate moans, bucking her hips against Y/n’s face.

“shit” Kate groans. “Y/n- go faster” Kate pleads, throwing her head back.

“mhm” Y/n mutters, moving her tongue faster against Kate.

“Fuck. I-I’m gonna cum” Kate moans.

“Cum for me, baby” Y/n wishes.

The band snaps in Kates stomach as she cums.

“Oh my God. Fuck, yes” A pornographic moan leaves Kate’s Mouth as she rides her high out.

“Shit, you’re so good at that” Kate shudders, out of breath. “you should let me take control more then” Y/n suggests.

“Fuck no” Kate shakes her head.

☆☆

“i’m so tired” Kate groans, taking a sip out of her water bottle. Coach Bluder was working them really hard today.

“Holy shit Kate- what’s on your neck?” Gabbie says from the side of Kate, pointing out the particularly huge purple mark.

“What do you mean?” Kate says touching her neck. Fuck, the makeup melted off. Kate thinks.

“Holy shit, Kate has a hickey!” Gabbie calls out as the team runs over. “Damn, Kate, that’s one big hickey.” Jada says, studying the mark intently.

“Alright, bruh, move” Kate waves the girls off, walking into the locker room.

“So freaky” Caitlin mutters as the rest of the team walks in behind her.

“You and Y/n had a good time last night, hm” Taylor says, raising her eyebrows.

“My god, hush your mouths” Kate says, pulling her shirt and shorts off to reveal way more hickeys.

“What the fuck? it looks like someone beat the shit out of you” Kennise snickers, pointing out the purple marks across Kate’s body.

“look at her thighs! Oh my Lord, ya’ll are freaky, freaky” Aj laughs causing the rest of the girls to burst out in laughter.

“Just say ya’ll are jealous that i’m getting laid and ya’ll aren’t” Kate shrugs.

“Child, please. I get laid every night” Caitlin snickers causing the entire locker room to say “eww”.

“Guys it’s true though, you don’t even know how many times I walked in on her and her girl.” Gabbie says, gagging.

“Okay, that’s your fault for not knocking” Caitlin argues.

“No, it’s your fault for not locking the door” Gabbie rolls her eyes.

“Kate, you need to figure something out because Lord have mercy” Kennise says, raising her eyebrows at Kate.

“Yeah, yeah.” Kate says, rolling her eyes at the freshman guard.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Thanks for reading!

dont know what else to say 😬😬 .

[shuuuuush]

I NEED YOU [Sharky]

Summary: 24-hour challenge without Y/N. Simple right? Not for Sharky.

Warnings: none

A/N: This was actually going to be the can I kiss you yet fic, but then I had the other idea, and now here we are 😭 if u want, consider this the alternative for that fic.

*** ***

*** ***

"I hate this already."

Sharky groaned as he was supposed to make a video for his channel. The beta squad members give him a 24 hour challenge to complete and if he completes it, they give him £200.

But what he didn't know was that they all agreed to give him the same challenge. 24 hours without you.

When they told him about the challenge, the look on his face said it all. The boys knew he would lose this challenge and they would gain £200. Their evil smirks convinced Sharky that he would probably lose the money. But he would try anyway.

"Seriously? You do realise this is physically impossible. I contact her on a daily basis." Sharky admitted, after they told him about the challenge.

"Exactly! Meaning easy money for us. Or extra money for you if you do manage to complete it. But we all know you won't." Niko laughed as he had a clear evil plan ahead.

Determined to prove them wrong as he can't lose at his own video, he agreed to the challenge. AJ started explaining the rules to him.

"Ok Sharks, this challenge means no Y/N at ALL for 24 hours. No texts, calls, visiting her, hugs, kisses, all that crap etc. You have to survive 24 hours, got it?" As Aj explained it Sharky was already on his phone trying to text you one last time before it started but then Chunkz snatched his phone out of his hand.

"Nope, no phones, Sharky." Chunkz did his famous laugh, and he could tell they were all having fun with this.

"Wait, so does Y/N know about this challenge?" Sharky asked, and when he saw all their faces, he knew the answer before they replied, causing an eye roll from the Somali.

"Nope." The four all laughed, finding it funny how they'll be able to see their friend in misery for 24 hours.

Sharky sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. "You're gonna make me lose my relationship, you know?"

.

.

.

The beta squad boys had taken turns to stay with Sharky and watch him to make sure he doesn't contact you in any way. Or try and escape to visit you.

The first hour, Sharky was fine. "Living life" according to his own words, technically this wasn't the normal amount of time he survives without seeing you.

Walking around the house, munching, playing football with Kenny (even if Kenny wasn't the best at football) as he was the first one over watching him. Doing anything to get his mind off the challenge and make it like a normal day.

Forwarding to the 3rd hour, Niko now was in charge over Sharky and decided to make things a bit more fun compared to the normal routine.

He messed around with Sharky, pretending to call your number to make plans to hang out with everyone but Sharky. Almost grabbing the phone from Niko, he suddenly remembered the challenge and retracted his hand. Laughing in victory Niko teased Sharky as he told him,

"Ohh almost lost the challenge there Sharks!"

"Shut up."

Slightly slouching over in defeat and stomping annoyed back to his room. Maybe a couple of winks will help pass the time, he thought. Not on Niko's watch. He made sure that sleeping was no option to pass time as it was sort of "breaking the rules."

Even though Aj wasn't meant to be helping over to watch Sharky at this hour, since Niko was still in charge, he helped Niko prank Sharky to see if he would lose the challenge. They put a voice recording of your voice from a previous video in one of the rooms.

Aj snickered as he press play on the recorder, hearing your voice throughout the rooms, Sharky stood up. It sounded like you were talking to someone and he almost left his room as quick as possible until he caught Niko and Aj laughing behind the camera.

Rolling his eyes, he said, "I see what you guys were trying to do, you were trying to trick me into going to find her huh? Yeah no."

Seeing as though their plan didn't work, they decided to show Sharky what it was anyway to cure his curiosity. And they went into one of the rooms, and it had the voice recorder with a picture of you on it. That picture was framed and taken from Sharkys desk.

As he looked at your picture, Sharky scratched the back of his neck. Yeah, this challenge is starting to get harder.

Chunkz was watching him now. It had been 5 hours into the challenge currently, and for Sharky, 5 hours is painstakingly long.

They were both in the sitting room, on separate couches though. Taking the camera and focusing it on himself, he spoke quietly so as not to let Chunkz hear him.

"Ok so far, I'll be honest I've done well but I can't take it anymore. 5 hours is too long."

He looked back to make sure Chunkz wasn't listening, he had headphones on and was scrolling through his phone. Sharky was slightly thankful Chunkz really couldn't care less about the challenge as much as Niko and Aj.

"I'm gonna try and sneak out now, hopefully I'll be able to do this." He winked at the camera and slowly got up giving it back to the camera man and walking towards Chunkz as an idea formed in his head.

"Hey man, I'm gonna go to the bathroom real quick." Sharky told him, trying to not to look too suspicious.

"Yeah ok, just don't spend the whole video in there." Chunkz replied, waving him off but not taking his eyes off his screen.

Now was Sharkys chance, obviously he couldn't take the camera with him and his phone was still with Chunkz. So he was on his own now.

Going to the bathroom and closing the door, he climbed up the window of the bathroom and out the side of the house. Good thing he brought his car keys because he was about to his car that was parked on the side of the road.

Getting into his car, he thought about the challenge. Losing 200 pounds because he couldn't be away from you for 24 hours? Yeah, he was about to fail that challenge anyway. He needed you right now.

Starting the car and heading down to your house, he was desperate to be in your arms. 5 damn hours he had to suffer without you, he couldn't take it any longer.

Knocking at your door, he took a deep breath. Hopefully, you were at home right now. Hearing the jingling of keys unlocking the door, his worries ceased when he saw your face as you opened the door. He ran up to embrace you in a hug, and he sighed in relief and contentment.

You were confused but hugged him back, slowly closing the door while you were there.

"Sharky, why didn't you answer any of my texts? I was gonna head to your house to see if you wanted to get something to eat together." You asked, still hugging him as you layed your head on his shoulder.

"I was doing a stupid challenge the boys made me do. But it's over now, I'm here with you." He mumbled, closing his eyes as he felt comfortable in your embrace.

Letting go, but still holding his hands, you asked, "What was the challenge about?"

"24 hours without you."

You almost laughed. Of course, they would make Sharky do a challenge like this. You knew they thought that he would fail it, too.

"Well, did you make it?"

"I made it only 5 hours in." Hearing your laughter, he pouted, "Hey! 5 hours is long damn time Y/N."

"And what was the forfeit?" You asked, shaking your head with a small chuckle. You were glad he loved you so much that he didn't want to be away from you for so long.

"£200." He said, annoyed, looking away as he knew that the account money would definitely be gone. "Now, can I kiss you? It's been too long."

"5 hours is not that long but su-"

He didn't care about your answer because he was going to kiss you regardless, and the second he did, you melted into it.

Suddenly, you both heard a knock on the door, and you pulled away, heading towards the door to open it. And you were met with four familiar faces.

"Sharky!" Niko yelled, "You lost the challenge you schmuck, can't even stay away for a day, huh?"

You laughed at Nikos' reaction, and Sharky just placed his hands on his hips and shook his head. The rest of the boys teased Sharky for failing so quickly, but of course, they had to say hello to you and tell you about what a loser Sharky is and how he failed that challenge so badly. (They were joking, but still)

"Alright, alright, that's enough. Get on out of here." Sharky rushed towards the door, got the £200 out of his pocket, and threw it at the lot. They laughed in victory as he just shut the door.

You also laughed and went up to hold him in your arms again.

"You know we could have used that £200 pound for something Sharky, I wouldn't have minded."

He pulled out of your embrace and held your face with both of his hands, looking directly into your eyes,

"I don't need £200. I need you."

Taglist: @b4tasquad, @p3drii , @n1kodl, @elora-k, @slutforpablogavi, @enhacolor

[alealuvshayden]

hes looking at me btw!

₊˚⊹♡

[jcreauprcntissfam]

first night and promises.

emily prentiss had faced down serial killers, international criminals, and the deepest recesses of her own mind, but nothing in her life had ever prepared her for this.

this tiny, fragile little person in her arms—her daughter—was looking up at her like she held the answers to everything in the universe.

aria had come into the world just a few hours earlier, and the raw intensity of it still hadn’t worn off. jj was fast asleep in the hospital bed, utterly spent after a grueling labor, her body finally surrendering to exhaustion. emily had stayed by her side the entire time, her hand gripping jj’s through the pain, the tears, and the eventual joy.

jj and emily had thought long and hard about the decision. they weren’t in their late twenties or early thirties anymore. having a child at this age, with their careers, was a choice. the right choice. henry, now graduating high school, and michael, just starting his sophomore year, had kept them busy for years. after will and jj divorced, emily naturally became their mom too. their family was happy—full of love and laughter. but the thought lingered in emily’s mind, and jj’s too, after they finally admitted it to each other last christmas morning.

“i want a baby. with you.”

maybe it was the desire to create someone who was a mixture of them both. maybe emily wanted to rewrite the what-ifs she’d carried since she was fifteen. maybe jj wanted to fill the space maggie might have held if things had been different.

either way, the decision became clear. after months of ivf preparations, genetic testing, and everything else, jj fell pregnant in early spring.

and now, here they were. quiet. peaceful. whole. 

the dim lights of the hospital room casting a warm glow as emily sat in the chair beside jj’s bed, cradling aria in her arms.

aria elizabeth jareau-prentiss. they toyed around with the middle name for a while. they tried ‘rose’, in honor of jj’s late sister - but they kept landing back on emily’s middle name. 

‘she can give it a better meaning to me’ emily recalled months before the birth. no longer associated with her estranged mother, but associated with the miracle she now held. 

the baby was wrapped snugly in a soft pink blanket, her impossibly tiny fingers curling and uncurling against emily’s chest. she didn’t cry, didn’t fuss—she just stared up at emily with those big, brown eyes that seemed to see everything.

emily swallowed hard, her throat tight with emotion as she met her daughter’s gaze. 

“hi there..”

she whispered, her voice soft and reverent, as if speaking too loudly might shatter the fragile magic of the moment.

aria blinked at her, her little mouth forming a perfect “o,” and emily couldn’t help but smile.

“you’re so quiet,” emily murmured, brushing her thumb gently over aria’s cheek. “your mama’s going to love that. let’s see how long it lasts.”

she adjusted aria slightly in her arms, careful not to disturb her too much. the baby wiggled a little but didn’t make a sound. instead, she kept staring, her expression almost curious, as if trying to figure out who this strange woman holding her was. she knew her voice, but not her face, not until now.  

“you have no idea how long we waited for you,” emily said, her voice trembling slightly. “how much we wanted you.”

her gaze flicked briefly to jj, who was still sleeping soundly. her blonde hair was messy, her face still flushed from the effort of bringing their daughter into the world, but to emily, she looked more beautiful than ever.

“your mommy,” emily said softly, her eyes returning to aria, “is the strongest person i’ve ever met. she loves you more than anything. she’s going to show you every single day how amazing you are.”

aria yawned, her tiny mouth opening impossibly wide, and emily let out a quiet laugh - mixed with the emotion and mist in her eyes.

“but you know what?” emily continued, her voice dropping even lower. “i think i might love you just as much. maybe even more.”

she paused, staring down at aria’s tiny face, her heart aching in the best way. “you look like her,” emily murmured. “same nose, same lips… but those eyes? those are mine.”

for a moment, emily just held her, letting the weight of it all settle over her. this was her daughter. her little girl. and as much as emily wanted to bask in the joy of the moment, a familiar shadow crept into her thoughts.

her own mother.

elizabeth prentiss had been a lot of things: powerful, successful, intimidating. but she had never been what emily needed her to be. she had never been kind. never been warm.

emily could still feel the weight of her mother’s expectations pressing down on her, the coldness in her voice, the way she always made emily feel like she wasn’t enough.

her chest tightened at the memory, and she looked down at aria again, at her innocent little face, her trusting eyes.

how could anyone treat a child with anything but love?

“i promise,” emily whispered, her voice trembling, “you will never feel the way i did.”

aria blinked up at her, her tiny fingers wrapping around emily’s thumb as if she was already communicating with her.

“i will never let you feel like you’re not enough,” emily said, tears welling up in her eyes. “i will never make you doubt that you’re loved. i will protect you from everything, even me, if i have to.”

the tears spilled over, but emily didn’t bother wiping them away. she pressed a soft kiss to aria’s forehead, breathing in the sweet, baby-soft scent of her skin.

“i’ve got you, baby girl,” she murmured, her voice thick with emotion. “always.”

and in that moment, as aria blinked up at her with those big, brown eyes—her eyes—emily made a vow.

she would be the mother she never had. the mother aria deserved.

no matter what it took.

[idorelyss]

SORRY, I'M SO STUPID | S.LOHMANN¹²

summary: you're an idiot who lost the love of your life. somehow, you get her back.

contains: sydney lohmann x bayfcplayer.ᐟreader, exes to lovers, mentions of relationship insecurities, sorta messy timeline, mentions of concussion/injury, jealousy, jealous.ᐟreader, sydney got the patience of a saint, they're inlove your honor, some angst with fluff

word count: 6.0k

author note: first fic on this blog, hopefully you cool ppl in my phone like it. lil warning for the fic going from past tense to present tense alot, that's the point. i tried a slightly different writing style doing this so let's hope it eats. enough yapping, enjoy ❤️ p.s. this is a lyrics fic.

PLAYING THINGS I WISH YOU SAID BY SABRINA CARPENTER

baby, sorry, i left you in the dark. i always reach for your leg over there on your side of the car

you are really fucking stupid. at least, that's what you have been telling yourself for the past two months.

you're in your car, on your way to deyna's party. of course, san jose traffic is packed and going at snail speed, leaving you with time to think many thoughts. way too many thoughts.

thoughts that are mainly involving a pretty, german blonde who used to be yours at one point. she would still be yours right now if you didn't end things impulsively.

what did your parents say when you were a teenager about how social media is poison? you are slowly starting to agree because you let opinions circulating around social media and your insecurities end a good thing. now the one person you didn't want to hurt in this life is hurt and you're hurting alongside her.

you almost want to forget about her, but who could forget about sydney?

that's why when you change lanes to reach your exit on the highway, your hand automatically goes to the passenger seat to reach for a thigh that isn't there.

right. she's in germany, not here.

you're so fucking stupid.

baby, everything reminds me of you. nobody gets my jokes, everyone here thinks i'm fucking rude

being at practice reminds you so much of sydney. it makes sense, you both are professional players. so of course your day is riddled with memories of sydney.

arriving at the training facility reminds you of that time sydney told you she tripped coming into bayern's training building, and she was teased for days.

going through drills has you thinking about when sydney whined on the phone everyday about her legs and feet hurting after practice.

time in the gym, doing your cardio is not that different from the days where sydney and you would workout out together. getting a sweet treat right afterward.

so, by the time training is over, you are ready to get dressed quickly in the locker room and duck out to go drown in your self-pity and regret at home. it's too bad that even the locker room reminds you of sydney or the lack thereof.

“why are you changing so fast? trying to run away from those bad shots you made?” jen jokes, coming to sit by you at your cubby.

you look at her, your hands still occupied tying your shoe. “you cannot be talking after the amount of times you fell. your age catching up to you?” you say in a similar joking tone with a side of deadpan,

or so you thought as everyone looks at you like you're crazy.

“i was just playing around, chill,” jen says. her words confuse you and so does the reactions of your other teammates.

did your joke have venom that you were unaware of behind it? or did you say it more on the side of deadpan than joking?

all you know is that sydney would have laughed at that. she would be giggling so hard, her face would get all red. then she would have thrown an even better insult right back at you.

you really miss her.

when i saw you cry, i didn't handle it well. without you here, i don’t know what to do with myself.

your nights have been so boring ever since you broke up with sydney. the same routine: get home, shower, water the plants, eat dinner, and then spend an hour or two scrolling on social media trying to fight the urge to stalk sydney's page.

you had blocked the blonde back when you two first broke up. you remember how klara texted you about how that's “childish and just hurts you both more.” she's right, of course, but who's going to tell her that? not you. not after you made a whole big deal about moving on and focusing on your career.

moving on doesn't even seem right. that's for people who were heartbroken by chance, not on purpose. it's not for people who hurt themselves by ending something that was good and stable because they couldn't get out of their own head.

still, as you lay there and scroll, your entire being craves for what used to belong to it.

you desire sydney's warmth.

you miss sydney's scent.

you are hungry for sydney's kisses.

you need to be held down by the weight of her body on top of yours.

instead, you are being weighed down by the pain you inflicted upon her. haunted by the sight of tears filling up in her eyes the day you ended everything and walked away. the unanswered text messages she left you the following night after she got drunk. the single text that followed the morning after that,

those were mistakes. ignore them.

everything blares in your head like an alarm that never stops. a clock that is broken, but not because it doesn't sound off but because it continues to sound off even if you want it to stop. there is no snooze for your regret, not with the way your dreams are filled to the brim with thoughts of sydney, too.

i think about these things at night before i fall asleep. things i wish you said to me.

syd's barely affectionate with her.

they don't give off girlfriends vibes.

sydney is more cuddly with her friends than her own girlfriend.

wonder when they are going to break up.

it's not going to last.

you reread the comments that led to your self inflicted suffering in the first place. the noodles in front of you on the table have run cold and your appetite is halfway gone at this point anyways.

social media has never been a big part of how you move throughout the world. you love to doomscroll, and of course, you have your favorite creators across platforms. you know about different trends and internet slang. duh, you aren't thirty. but you never used to let social media dictate how you interact with people outside of it. social media is full of algorithms and echo-chambers made to take over people's thoughts. forcing them to stay on apps longer than needed to look for solutions for problems that have been caused by said apps.

that's always how you felt.

but even you fell into the trap of social media. early in your relationship with sydney, you were too in the honeymoon phase to think about looking at socials. too wrapped up in sydney. however, when you two calmed down into a just as in love but more controlled state, your mind started wandering.

wondering what people are saying about you two. do they find you two cute? couple goals? were there fanpages for your relationship?

other players who are in relationships often have these things, so why wouldn't you guys have those as well?

what you didn't expect to find was people overanalyzing the way sydney and you interacted in public. for people to wonder if you guys are even in love.

“they don't see me when i'm with you. they don't know how attached i am to you every second we are alone,” sydney said when you brought up your growing insecurity. she was smiling all sweet, sitting on top of you.

how could you not believe her with the way she's kissing the frown off your lips?

your insecurities still grew and grew and grew until they became a hill. a hill, you weren't able to climb over.

they don't know how sydney loves wearing your clothes around and outside of the house because she's obsessed with your smell. they don't know about all the nights she cuddled into your side, basically glued to your skin. they aren't there on the days you were in sydney's apartment, cooking and dancing with her. they don't see the way she is all over you when you two are alone.

yeah, she wasn't super affectionate in public but that's only because she got so shy every time you showed her any love.

fans online didn't know about any of that, but you wish they did. you wish you didn't put so much value into their opinions because you probably would still have sydney in your grasp right now if you didn't.

if only you came to sydney about this more. the german player would rush to do anything that would make you feel better, more secure. but no, you just couldn't because you were afraid she would be annoyed you kept bringing the topic up after she reassured you the first time.

sydney would have never done that and you knew that.

that wrongful thought was influenced by that stupid hill in your head that was built on tons and tons of mean comments. the weariness of long distance fueled the comments impact on your mind deeply. getting reassured over the phone wouldn't be as satisfying as in person, so you never brought up the topic again and everytime you were with sydney, you didn't want to ruin the moment so again you didn't say a word. all of this created a hamster wheel you couldn't get out of.

you get up from the table, throwing your noodles away. they are too cool to eat now, and reheated noodles do not sound appetizing.

slipping into bed, your mind thinks back to the past over and over again until it tires itself out enough that you drift off to sleep.

things like “darling, i hope you know it scared me to death. the night that your sister said you got into an accident.”

number that SHOULD be blocked

i'm so sorry about your injury

when i saw you go down, my heart fell to my ass

i hope you have good ppl around you to take care of you ❤️

contact changed to sydney

you

i do

thanks for texting

sydney

….

yk i'm here for you too, right?

ik we broke up and aren't supposed to talk but

i'm just rlly worried about you

your heart feels like it's beating at 100 miles per hour. first, sydney texts you then second, she's worried about your injury and third, she wants to fucking be there for you.

is this a dream? have your wishes to get her back finally come true?

you look at the text, pondering what to send back. an immediate yes would be too desperate, right? but you are desperate for her you think to yourself.

fuck it, just say yes.

right when you are about to text back, sydney beats you to it.

sydney

there's no pressure

i know we haven't talked in forever

how is she being so considerate when you're the one who broke her heart?

you

i want you

sydney

??

you

i mean i want you to be there for me

can we talk pls?

be friends or whatever you want

sydney

duh

i'm the one who offered

there go the other side of sydney that you know and love.

“and god, i, i'm watching everything that you do. i can't get your songs out of my head or your hair out of my room.”

sydney and you have been texting back and forth everyday since that day she texted you. anyone looking from outside the situation would said it's heading straight for disaster. exes texting regularly again? especially when one is still very much inlove with the other? a speeding train just waiting to crash.

to that, you would say they don't understand. there isn't no tension or lingering resentment or anger between sydney and you while yall talk. that truth surprises you considering the fact you basically dumped sydney four months ago. if the roles were reversed, you wouldn't want to see her ever again, but somehow sydney's heart is overflowing with so much love that she doesn't have room to hate you.

she checks up on your well-being pertaining to your head injury. the recovery so far has been slow, very slow. you aren't even in rehab yet, still stuck at home resting and sleeping throughout the day. thankfully, your parents flew to san jose to come take care of you.

when you aren't sleeping, then you are texting sydney. her check-ups on you have slowly turned into long conversations about her day. texting her almost makes you feel like you two never broke up, that you two are still dating.

when you can't talk to her or are unable to sleep, you keep up to date with bayern munich. if someone asked why you were watching them, you would say not only for sydney, but that would be a lie. just a little white lie, though. you're watching for klara, lea, and lena too.. but mostly for sydney.

seeing her in her element, all sweaty and passionate, makes your head feel a little less broken, so yes, you will continue to watch her matches without telling her.

and what you don't know is that sydney thinks of you every time her feet touch the pitch. how she goes even harder than normal to impress you just in case you are watching. she hopes you are watching her, she always has and always will. even right after you broke up with her and she had to push her feelings down to go put on a good performance for germany, she played so hard she was MVP of both friendlies. back then, sydney hoped you viewed her performances with envy. with deep regret for letting go of a woman like her. now she hopes you look at her in admiration when she plays well.

you also don't know that sydney never threw away any of the gifts you gave her during your relationship. she was supposed to throw everything away in a box like lea recommended, but she couldn't. she couldn't throw away all of the memories she had left of you in her home. she couldn't delete the pictures she had of you in her phone. she couldn't even block your number.

sydney hanged onto every single last string she had that was still connected to you. it's hard to let go after being dumped. she thought, no, she knew you were the love of life. her entire world came crashing down when you sat her down on the last day of you visiting her in germany, suddenly saying you believe you two should be over. that long distance isn't working out for you anymore.

she cried for a week after you left. klara had to come over and help her clean up her apartment after a week of just crying in bed.

after that, the blonde slowly tried to move on. she went out more, with and without her friends. posted more on instagram. pushed herself into drowning in work related to football. even all of that didn't help her forget about you. she couldn't. her soul still yearned for yours.

she watched your matches in secret, all of her attention focused on you. her heart rate would perk up whenever commentators said your name. she wasn't able to pull her attention away from her tv when the camera would do a close-up of you.

so obviously, the day you got injured, sydney knew. she saw the way you went down and didn't get back up. her blood was rushing to her head, her chest was hurting as she watched you get carried off. it nearly felt like she was the one injured with how her body was feeling.

could sydney be faulted for texting you? for worrying about you? klara would slap the phone out of her hand if she knew about this, but good thing klara wasn't in her apartment. going off straight adrenaline and concern, sydney sent that text that led to you being back in her life.

texting back and forth everyday has sydney dopamine hooked. you still have the same effect on her that you always have.

every time she texts you, her eyes glance around her room at the various things you left behind when you broke up with her.

the sweater you never asked for back.

the dragon stuffed animal she won for you at a carnival.

the brush you always used when you came over. she couldn't bring herself to use it after you left her, so it just sat on her vanity, taunting her for ages.

sydney told herself that when she texted you about your injury, you two would keep a certain level of distance. that you wouldn't become lovers again. that she was only checking up on you every day because you deserved people in your corner.

that last part is true, but her other motive is also there: she wants you back.

i saw you meet somebody, and i'm jealous as hell. that i can't even stomach loving someone else.

the texting between sydney and you have gone from texting to calling. a big leap, but you both admitted to liking calling more than anything else.

the calling is totally not an indication of falling back into a similar routine from before the break-up.

or maybe it is because you don't fall asleep on the phone with your friends, you don't text your friends good morning and good night, you don't send so many selfies of yourself to your friends. those are actions you always have done with sydney.

anyone could see that you two still like each other, obviously, but you are seemingly blind to it.

perhaps it's the regret, pity, and guilt for ruining a good thing for no reason that's keeping you ignorant of what's growing between you two once more.

that ignorance wouldn't last forever.

sydney and you have now been in contact again for five months, more than no-contact lasted. your recovery is coming along better than your doctors expected. your head doesn't feel heavy anymore and you can have the tv above sixty without your head feeling like it's going to explode. sydney was more happy about this progress than you were.

syd 🥺

just watch

in a few months you're going to be able to run and play again

you

my doctors said that's not happening so soon

syd 🥺

idcc

you're like half magical so you will recover soon

you

LMAOOO

half magical is insane

you're crazy

syd 🥺

crazy or optimistic?

you

both…

syd 🥺

WOW??

okay i see how it is

say this to my face

incoming call from syd 🥺

after you answer the call, sydney and you talk for three hours. bickering back and forth with a mix of talking about your days. of course, your day is the same as always. you slept, ate, crocheted a bit with your mother, and saw your doctor. meanwhile, sydney's was full of life per usual. she went grocery shopping, helped lea clean out her spare room, got some sweets from a bakery, and “saw the cutest dog while walking home” in her own words. hearing about her lively days makes you feel a bit better about your own days that are very simple and very boring nine times out of ten. there isn't much a person recovering from a concussion can do.

you could push away and ignore your feelings when you two were in just a bubble of you and sydney. nobody else is in the way, questioning if exes talking everyday was healthy. nobody wondering if all that contact would lead to something more.

that bubble is broken the day you see something that makes you feel sick.

it's a saturday, you're scrolling on instagram. sydney is busy at a gathering with some friends, leaving you to your own devices.

sorta already missing her, you go on her instagram to look at her posts. you had unblocked the moment you two started talking again. as you click on her story, you wish you still had her blocked.

your head feels like it's going to explode as you look at the photo: sydney is sitting on a couch, and some girl is on her lap, smiling way too hard.

what the hell was going on?

you almost type out a message to sydney before you get control of your emotions. it isn't your place to be jealous or hurt or annoyed. sydney and you aren't together anymore. you two are friends, only friends right now.

you feel sick as you swipe out of instagram. it's time for a nap before your head falls off of your body with the way it pounds.

seeing sydney with someone else is making you stop believing the lie that you two were platonic right now. you could never be friends with the woman you love.

i think about these things at night before i fall asleep. things i wish you said to me.

that instagram story sets off a series of events.

first, you slowly took a step back from talking to sydney. the step back was so slow that she didn't notice at first. honestly, you took two more months to not talk to her everyday because you were hooked on her messages. hooked on her jokes and selfies and laugh and cute rambles. still, you somehow did it. instead of talking everyday, you two talked three days a week and only for an hour. way less than you two used to do.

second, you started putting tons of work into your recovery. seeing a physical therapist and slowly incorporating small, easy exercises into your day helps you come closer to getting back on the pitch. the first day you step back onto the bay fc training facility grounds, your emotions are everywhere. you haven't seen your teammates as much as you use to when you were not injured and seeing them training while you were just visiting the physical therapist killed you. they were all happy to see you though, catching you up on everything that has been happening since you were away. your head injury has calmed down enough that you could sit outside and watch everyone else practice. all the shouting and sounds of bodies moving doesn't irritate your head thankfully. you follow this similar routine for a long while, even if you are slightly sad about not being able to play.

and finally, sydney confronts you about pushing her out of your life.

you're lying on your bed, having just came back from a day at the bay fc training facility. you and sydney haven't talked for a week straight, her apparently busy with her life over in germany and you making an active choice to talk to her less.

that's why when a notification from her comes up on your screen, you look away from your screen then back at it to see if this is happening right now. it's not the notification itself that makes you act like that, but the message,

sydney (wait 30 mins before answering)

why are you treating me like this again?

you

sydney

what are you talking about?

sydney (wait 30 mins before answering)

you're ignoring me

we barely talk anymore

what's gotten into you?

you try to think up an excuse. eventually landing on,

you

yk i'm busy with rehab and stuff

sydney (wait 30 mins before answering)

bullshit

stop lying to me

you

calm down syd

omg

sydney (wait 30 mins before answering)

don't tell me to calm down wtf

first you randomly break up with me for some stupid reason

“long distance isn't working” whatever that supposed to mean

i just know in my gut that's not why you left me

now we became close again and you're leaving me again?

why let me back in your life if you're going to do this to me

your head is starting to pound as blood rushes to your face. you always hated when sydney was angry with you and this time is no different. it's justified though. what you're doing is really cruel, pushing sydney away after becoming close with her again. you have hurt her once again.

you're so stupid.

in the process of trying to run from your feelings, trying to ignore the jealousy seeping from your psyche after seeing the photo of that random girl on her lap in that photo. lost in your thoughts, you don't realize that it's been ten minutes since you replied to her.

sydney (wait 30 mins before answering)

okay

do what you want

march 14th, 11:11pm, read

ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

“i don't know how to say this.. but you deserve an explanation. you wouldn't answer my calls or texts, and i get it. i left you not once but twice. both times for stupid reasons that i should have communicated instead of going ghost. the day i broke up with you.. i cried the moment i got home. all i could think about for so long is how hurt you looked. that should have made me act, but it didn't, and i just regret everything. the first time i pushed you away, it's because i let the internet get to me. make me feel all insecure about us. i pushed you away a second time because i realized i couldn't stay platonic with you. i.. saw that insta story of yours. the one with that girl on your lap. i lost my mind because i thought i didn't have a chance with you ever again. i'm really sorry, so sorry. i miss you so much. call me back, please?”

voicemail left to sydney, april 23rd, 3:00am

sorry, i pulled the “it's not you. it's me.” one day, i'll make sure you get a real apology.

sydney

are you busy?

she texts you one day in july. you thought that she was fully done with you after not speaking for nearly two months, but thankfully she isn't. you can make this right.

you

no

incoming call from sydney

…

“hello?”

you haven't heard her voice in so long. it sounds just the same, all soft and pretty. a rush of fondness hits you.

“hi sydney,” you say, more like whisper, into the phone.

there's some shuffling on the other line before she speaks again. was she moving around on her bed? it's a nervous habit of hers to move during intense situations you think to yourself.

you push your thoughts to the side as sydney speaks, “.. i got your voicemail.”

you thought she deleted it with how long it has been since you had sent it.

“did you like it?” you say.

why the fuck did you say that?

instead of hanging up the phone in your face, sydney laughs. you have missed her laugh so much.

“i wouldn't be calling if i didn't.”

“oh right.. sorry.” you let out a laugh of your own at your stupidity. not just your stupidity from right now but all the times before, too.

then the moment you start laughing, that makes sydney start laughing again. creating a cycle of you laughing at her laughter, then her laughing at yours and again. laughing on the phone with your ex after not speaking for some months once again is actually insane, but it seems like that's just how sydney and you are: insane.

the two of you calm down soon enough. getting back to the serious conversation that needs to be had.

“you know it really hurt me when you stopped talking to me. i thought we were getting somewhere.. platonic or not. it hurts even more to know you still like me but pushed me away anyways. don't you want me?”

“of course i want you.”

“then why didn't you say anything?”

“....”

“that was a stupid question.. i listened to your voicemail. i know why.. i just want to hear it from your own mouth in real time.”

you sigh before going silent for a moment. sydney doesn't speak, she just waits.

“i just.. was so insecure the longer we were together. i know at the time you told me to ignore social media, but i couldn't. all of those people were saying we shouldn't be together and that you didn't want me. i couldn't take it. i felt like i was holding you back from someone better, so i left. then when we started talking again, i deluded myself into believing we were on our way to being just platonic but i can never be just friends with you. the night i saw that photo on your insta story, i didn't know what to do.. so i left again. i'm sorry.”

“.. i accept your apology, but i'm still hurt. i thought you trusted me enough to talk to me about anything?”

“i do.. i did.. i swear.”

“you don't act like it.”

“i'll be better if you let me. if you want me.”

“i want you, but you'll have to work for it. i'm not taking you back that easily.”

i waste my time, i waste my life on idiotic things. like things you never said. things you'll never say to me.

sydney and you start talking again after that call. things between you two move slow though, very slow. more slow than the first time you guys got together.

you know that sydney is waiting things out, trying to see if you would leave her again. she keeps a certain distance when you two speak a little too flirty. she shuts it down quickly every time, which hurts, but you get it. you have to earn that side of her again.

and you do just that.

it's in small ways than some grand gesture. you tell about everytime you watch one of her matches, mostly praising her but throwing in some critique as well. after your rehab sessions, you tell her about everything. all your feelings surrounding the sessions, how much you've been improving. everytime you feel jealousy at one of sydney's posts, you talk to her about it.

that distance between you two slowly closes. not only emotionally but physically.

the summer the year after sydney and you reconnected for the second time since the break-up, you find the time to fly to germany for her birthday.

you asked before coming, though, not wanting to mess up the new connection you two are building.

“syd, i got a question,” you say, phone propped up on the bathroom sink as you got ready for another day at training. you have progressed very far in your recovery, thankfully, and can now do some light training with the team.

“hmmmmm?” sydney murmurs. she's looking all cute on the other line, face pressed to her pillow as she lays in bed. her room is dark, with the only light coming from her phone screen.

there's some hesitation that crosses your mind, but you push it away. communication, remember?

“can i come see you?” you ask.

sydney sits up slightly after hearing your question. there's clear confusion on her face.

“what do you mean?”

“i want to fly to germany for your birthday.”

sydney goes silent for a long moment. your nerves peak, looking at your screen. was this too big of a step for her? does she need more time to be ready to see you in person?

her answer surprises you.

“okay,” she says.

you booked your flight to germany that night and next thing you know, you're there. unfortunately, sydney isn't the one who picks you up from the airport. lena takes over that job, but it's still fun to hangout with lena after so long.

you don't see sydney until the day of her birthday. she claims she's been busy and you believe her. she texts you all the time even if she doesn't come see you physically.

your mind runs wild as you get ready for sydney's birthday party. you're in lena’s bathroom, making sure your hair looks perfect and your makeup doesn't make you look clown-ish and that your fit actually fits you and maybe you should brush your teeth again-

“you know sydney doesn't hate you, right?” lena interrupts your anxious thoughts.

“duh i know. i wouldn't be here if she did,” you say, still staring intensely at your appearance through the mirror.

lena rolls her eyes. “then why are you getting ready like we're going to a pageant? sydney likes you in every way. she was really hurt when you guys broke up, but obviously, she's moved on from it if she invited you to come all the way here.”

lena's words make you slow down your overanalyzing of yourself. she's right, sydney is forgiving you right now. trying to overdo everything to seem perfect isn't going to make her like you any more. she already likes you alot.

she wants you, not some polished version.

“you're right. i'm finished, let's go,” you say, leaving the sink and coming by the doorframe to make lena turn around. the two of you leave the bathroom, then put on your shoes and finally leave her apartment.

the drive to sydney's party is a short one, or at least it feels that way. lena, and you sing along to the songs on the radio the entire way there.

once at sydney's place, your heart starts racing. being back in her space feels so strange, but so right. alot is the same, but alot is different aswell. she bought a new couch, an upgrade from her old leather one. there's more plants around the place. her tv is new and even bigger than her last one.

the apartment is basically full with all of the bayern munich team and some other people from sydney's life. the smell of pizza and chicken hits your nose as you walk from the living room, where you greet everyone, to the kitchen.

and there is sydney.

her back is turned as you walk into the kitchen, but you can tell it's her.

her hair is styled in a ponytail, and she's wearing this black tank top and nice fitting jeans. she looks so pretty. she looks even prettier when she turns around.

“y/n?” sydney looks at you like she wasn't expecting you. perhaps she wasn't fully prepared to see you in person? even though she knew you were coming to her party. she allowed you to, after all.

you smile at her, “hi syd. is it too soon to say i missed you?”

“is it too soon to hug you?” she smiles at you back.

“i would be stupid to say yes, and i'm done being stupid.”

sydney flies into your arms, embracing you tightly. her arms wrap around your neck, her cheek pressing against yours. her quick reaction would feel weird if it didn't feel so right. you hug her back just as tight. it's been so long since you've been in her arms. so long since you smelled her scent. so long since you've even been around her.

“thank you for coming,” sydney says as she pulls away. not going too far as she stands close to you.

you laugh, “i'm the one who asked you. i should be thanking you.”

“for what?”

“for letting me back into your life.”

sydney's and your reunion is cut short by laura coming into the kitchen. she gives you two a look but doesn't say anything about your closeness.

“syd, you better get in here. it's your birthday party,” laura says, pointing to the living room. sydney looks at laura before looking at you. without thinking, you grab her hand and pull her out into the living room. time to party.

you ended up staying for longer than you thought you would in germany. sydney allowed you to stay in her spare room for the rest of your time there. the two of you have many, many conversations about where you two stand currently. she's not your girlfriend just yet, but you two are getting there.

when it's time for you to leave for america, sydney drives you to the airport and even blessed you with a kiss on the lips as a goodbye. your face is permanently flushed until you board the flight.

she texts you the moment you get off the plane back in san jose as well.

syd 💕

land safely?

you

yupp

but i miss you :(

syd 💕

miss you too :((

we'll see eachother soon

don't worry

you

call you when i get home?

syd 💕

call me when you get home

author note: i might possibly be working on an alt verison of this with sydney's pov.. depends on if my brain feels like working. hope yall enjoyed! 🙂‍↕️

© JACKIESUNSHINES, 2025

[teewritessmth]

My Pretty Boy

(Niko Omilana x f! reader)

Summary : Don't compliment him too much, he's rather shy.

Warnings : None

"How the hell do you look so good?? You're drinking water for fuck's sake..."

Your husband grins at your statement, wiping his lips with the back of his hand and softly kissing your forehead.

"I'm being serious you know, it isn't fair. You're actually so handsome and attractive and pretty-"

"Babe, pretty?"

He questions, flustered by the array of compliments but confused at the use of a particular one.

"Yeah, why not. I mean, have you seen yourself? Your eyes are big and round, your nose is the perfect shape and your skin is so soft-"

You tiptoe and wrap your arms around his neck, leaving soft kisses on his cheeks and pecking his lips.

"But my favourite thing about you are your lips, I could kiss you all day you know?"

Niko looks deep into your eyes as he squeezes your waist lightly, tenderly hugging you and burying his head into your shoulder.

You hum in contentment, swaying in his embrace.

"Niko, Oh my god-"

Your husband picks you up and puts you on the counter, locking you between his arms. He tucks a stray piece of hair behind your ears and caresses your face with his thumb.

You rest your hands on his chest, slowly sliding them upwards to cup his face. You didn't lie, that man was beautiful.

You pull him closer as your lips connect, you can feel him murmering 'I love yous'. God, that man loved sticking to his age old habit.

You smile against his lips, kissing him softly. He frowns as you pull away, a small pout taking place.

"You didn't say I love you back.."

"Well you gotta kiss me again then."

"Deal."

What a amazingly productive afternoon in the Omilana household.

.

.

.

Thank you @ajdefender for forcing me to write this. I love u.

Y'all forgive me this is short.

[thesassypadawan]

Santa Tell Me (A.J. x Button!Reader)

Summary:  It’s Christmas Eve and you except your boyfriend of year to pop the question…again.  However, before he can…you surprise him with a special gift of your own.

Warnings: 18+ (mdni), because there’s sooo much of the fluff with a bit of the smut. Fun from behind (giddy up), misuse of a jolly old elf’s hat, size diff, ho ho hoe lingerie, and… A.J.’s big, fat dick.

Notes:  Happy Holidays, lovelies!  Welcome to track seven of my special holiday mix, Santa Tell Me! ❤️💚

(Merry Christmas, @everydaydreamer! And thank you for making the perfect pic for this! 🎅)

- ‘Santa, tell me if you're really there…  Don't make me fall in love again if he won't be here next year…’

- One big hand comes to settle on your hip, squeezing gently.  The other taking your smaller one, lazily lacing and intertwining your fingers together.  Swaying you both slowly back and forth to the familiar, festive music.  Blue eyes locked with yours in the mirror’s reflection; gaze warm, affectionate…loving.

- “Look absolutely flawless, doll,” he mutters.  Voice low and gravelly, rumbling deep in his chest…through your petite frame.  Goosebumps forming on your skin…and not from the nonexistent chill in the air.  “Gorgeous like always, ‘cept it’s missin’ one thing.”

- You knew all too well where the conversation was going.  In the short year you two have been an item, you’ve heard it at least a dozen or so times.  The same sweet, endearing request; accompanied by the same little, velvet box.  That he seems to make appear out of nowhere, just like…

- “Oh, baby,” you sigh, hint of sadness in your words.  Watching A.J. pull it out from his vest pocket, fiddle and roll it with his long digits.  “I know you want to marry me bad, but…”

- Words fall short when he pops the lid open.  Revealing not a ring.  Instead what was easily the most beautiful, breathtaking opal necklace you’ve ever seen.

- “I know, I know…‘we’ll see’,” he chuckles.  Repeating your usual response, while helping you put it on.  Calloused fingertips brushing, lingering for an extra moment or two on the nape of your neck.  “Someday though, it’s gonna be…‘yes’.”

- Slight smile pulling at the corners of your pink tinted lips.  As you admire the way it sparkles in the twinkling light, the fact he remembered the significance of this stone.  At the amount of faith, patience he has in and when it comes to you.  Plus a few other things.  “Yeah…we’ll see.”

- Shrugging, leaning down he places a tender kiss on your cheek…the top of your head.  “Come on, we better get goin’.”  Before straightening up once more, giving a quick tap to your perfect bottom.  “Don’t wanna be too late to the party.”

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

- All evening long, you’re very much an inseparable pair.  Never one without the other, practically glued together at the hip. 

- With you holding onto, pressing into his side.  Peppermint swirled nails occasionally trailing up his spine, gently scratching a certain spot between his shoulder blades.  That has him grunting softly in appreciation…those lean muscles contorting, relaxing beneath your welcomed touch.

- As for him, well…  Hardly a minute passes when he doesn't have an arm wrapped around your waist or a palm resting on the small of your back.  Fingers rubbing, massaging.  Sometimes traveling a bit lower, under the hem of your cocktail dress when he thinks no one is looking…drawing out a tiny, muffled squeak from you each time.

- But on the rare instance when you weren’t attached to your better half.  You could be spotted with the rest of the ladies.  Mingling, being asked, more like grilled, on whether you finally caved…finally gave him the answer he wants to hear and officially join their patchwork family. 

- “We’ll see,” you would reply simply and politely.  Smiling coyly over the rim of your glass, at his turned back from across the room.  Watching as he folded another hand in the guys’ silly card game.  Listening to him echo your own words, undoubtedly given the same question.

- All in all, he whole night went by in what feels like a blur.  Of hearty laughs, variety of decadent treats, one too many cups of good cheer…a few stolen kisses below the mistletoe.  And, soon enough, you find yourself tugging on A.J.’s hand.  Bring him level, whispering in his ear for you to be whisked home.  Where the real party could begin, the best part yet to come…his last gift.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

- Crashing through the front door, nearly chipping the paint and knocking a picture off the wall.  Tongues tangled, lips meshed together in perfect harmony.  With your digits unabashedly pulling at his belt, fumbling for his fly.  And his slipping beneath the folds of your skirt; seeking out that string of mysterious, elusive lace felt during his earlier escapades.

- “Don’t be stingy, sweetheart,” he murmurs between heated kisses.  Hand inching ever higher, palm cupping and kneading a sweet cheek.  “It’s already after midnight.”  Thumb nonchalantly hooking, fiddling with the delicate fabric teasingly…letting it snap.  “Wanna open my present.”

- Jumping slightly, a squeal mixed with an excited giggle bubble up from your throat.  “Mmmh, all right.”   All the while rubbing, massaging that delectable bulge; enticing it to grow, strain the front of his trousers.  “Since you’ve been such a good boy this year.”  Giving it one last gentle squeeze, earning one more grunt.  Before…

- Gone for only a hot minute or two, you return to find him lounging naked on the couch.  Arms draped over the back lazily, long legs spread casually.  Santa hat perched perfectly, barely covering his candy cane and sack of goodies.  “That’s certainly a look, J.”

- Smirking, rising to his feet.  He keeps the jolly old elf’s cap securely in place as he saunters over, comes to meet you in front of the panoramic window.  Fingertips tangling, playing with the ribbon wound and tied perfectly around…  “Says the woman wearin’ paper like a dress.”

- Anticipating the inevitable sassy quip that would undoubtedly come, he acts quickly and smoothly.  “Not that I’m complain’.”  Bending, burying his face into the crook of your neck.  Lavishing your sugar cookie scented skin in love bites and nips.  “Or grateful.”

-As he tears away, takes his time. Savoring, slowly and carefully unwrapping.  “Musta been real good.”  Revealing the sexy, little ho-ho-hoe number that lay beneath.  “To deserve somethin’ this sweet…”

- Skillfully and in a single, fluid motion.  A.J. whirls, twirls you to the music that plays softly in the background.  “…exquisite…”  Pushing you against the cool glass.  Pinning and holding, encompassing you completely with his larger frame. Stocking hat left forgotten on the floor, laying amongst the shreds of discarded paper.  “…wonderful like ya.”

- Eyes hungrily sweep and take in your red, tulle clad form.  Meeting, locking with yours in the reflective surface.  “Now, on them tip-toes, baby doll…”  Palm smoothing down your semi- clothed back, following the intricate details and patterns of the bustier.  Settling on your hip, tugging on it a bit too roughly.  “…lemme try out my new toy.”

- Eagerly you ease, precariously balance on them.  Sparks of anticipation bursting, bemused smile crossing your face.  Watching him still have to slouch, crouch slightly.  To align himself with your aching entrance.  “Sure you’re not too big for this one?”

- Laying tender, adoring kisses along your spine.  His free hand finds, gropes a pert breast.  “Nah, not too big.”  Thumb swirls, fingertips rolls and pinches your pebbled bud.  Fat tip prods, teases at your soaked folds core.  “Always liked my playthings to be a little on the small…”  Surging forward, steadily stretching.  Forcing your tight cunny to open with his thick cock.  “Fuck…side.”

- Moaning, whimpering…nails scramble, scratch lightly.  Palms flatten, brace against the steamed-up glass.  While he thrusts, pounds into you unbridled and wild.  Toned chest pressed to, resting his full weight onto you.  A.J. looms above, grunting and groaning in your ear each time he bottoms out.  Increasing his pace with every powerful drive.

- “So…shit…”  Bullying and hitting, bruising your cervix over and over.  “Lemme get…”  The heat rises, pools in the pit of your stomach.  “Lemme get this straight…”  Peak approaching swiftly, gummy walls fluttering and burning.  “You’ll become the Clause Man’s wife before m-mine?”

- Body tenses, goes ridged.  Starts to shake from all the overwhelming pleasure that courses through.  “Who…who said that wasn’t you…”  You can feel him twitching and throbbing.  Shuddering as he draws closer to his own release, mind-numbing orgasm.  “That you’re not San-San…”

- Slamming hard, you both cry out in bliss.  You clamping and clenching, gushing all over him.  While he paints your insides a sticky, snowy white; stuffing your little stocking nice and full.

- Panting, knees shaking.  He helps you back down onto your feet.  Immediately wrapping, swallowing up your unsteady form in his strong arms.  Laughing happily and joyfully.  Peppering the top of your crown in frantic, loving kisses.  All because you finally agreed.  Said the one thing he’s been waiting to hear since he first presented you with that little, velvet box.  “Then I guess ya better call me Santa… Mrs. Clause.”

- Bursting out into a fit of giggles, sporting an elated grin.  You tilt your head back, teasing playfully…finally getting in a smart remark.  “So, Santa…tell me what else you want?”

- “Yeah, actually.”  Mirroring your smile, he starts to lazily rock…buck and rut again.  “I could think of one thing or two.  Maybe even three.” 

- Santa, tell me if he really cares…  'Cause I can't give it all away if he won't be here next year…’

Tag List: @espinathena-17, @myheartwillgoon2022, @laylaplease, @princessswifie, @kenobiskywalker16, @loverforoldermen, @lotte08, @rafeswifeyy2, @exsamlockwood-kate, @sythethecarrot, @decaffeinatedunicorn, @fuckmyskywalker, @everydaydreamer, @jediavengers, @anisangeldust, @erosmutt, @xhunnybeeex, @vaderswifey, @anakinstwinklebunny

@hearts4sammonroe, @pitas-star, @sythethecarrot, @naberriess, @steven-grants-world, @valyna27, @elcaballerodragon, @yayyy5678, @anakinsrilgirlfriend, @padme-urlove,  @brattyyybbg, @mrschr1stensen, @rosie-chan92, @beresfordsgirl, @darthdaddi, @icosmiclou, @whoisgiinaa, @kentaviax, @arcj

[mangocurist]

i saw a new champwatt comic from @phfobiaa drop on twitter and i got shot in the chest thirty times

@reddoonsn1fan this is for you. your champwatt propaganda infected me

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆.

It’s late at night when Seawatt poses the question, sitting just a few inches away from AJ as they stare out into the dark sky of the Master layer. The stars are almost just as bright as they were the night that the Old Man’s decree was passed, the night that his life was turned upside down and broken into pieces.

“Hey, AJ.” The sound of his own voice pierces the calm lull of silence between them, and Seawatt almost curses himself for disturbing the tranquility of their night. AJ, though, doesn’t seem to care (or perhaps he just doesn’t notice— Seawatt wouldn’t be the least bit surprised), turning to him with a quiet attentiveness he hardly ever possesses.

“Go on?” The other man nudges him when it becomes clear that Seawatt won’t speak on his own, his tongue lodged in his own throat and caught up in knots. “You didn’t want to just say ‘hi’, did you? If that was it, I expected some sort of monologue to come along with it.”

At that, Seawatt laughs despite himself, a rare ease that only ever possesses him around AJ settling around his shoulders. “No. No, that’s… you’re stupid. I wanted to know… if you were the Champion, what would you do?”

AJ tilts his head back, looking up at the stars surrounding them as he ponders over the question. Those small, glittering dots in the sky twinkle in time as the gleaming constellations covering AJ’s body do, and Seawatt finds himself thinking that he wouldn’t mind waiting forever for the other man’s answer.

It doesn’t take forever, though. 

“I would… banish the Old Man and make sure that he could never rank up,” AJ said, conviction coating his every word. 

The corner of Seawatt’s mouth quirked up; a little amused by the man’s confidence. It was what he had originally approached AJ for, sure… the man’s parkour prowess was undeniable, and if there was anyone who could defeat the Old Man and avenge Seawatt’s parents, it would be the only other citizen of Parkour Civilization who despised the Old Man just as much as Seawatt did… but getting to know AJ so closely and see him up close was something far different from studying the man’s moves from afar and wondering if there was finally someone else in his corner.

That’s why, when AJ opens his mouth to speak once more, Seawatt isn’t the least bit prepared to hear what he says next.

“Then… once I become Champion, and I get to change Parkour Civilization however I want… I’ll restore your layer.” AJ says, and Seawatt’s head snaps up to look at him.

“...Really?” He asks quietly, almost unsure of whether or not to believe the other man’s words. AJ isn’t looking at him, head still turned up toward the sky— but if Seawatt squints just a little, he thinks he can see a dark flush on the other’s face, drowning out the twinkling stars dotting his companion’s face.

It reminds him of the nebulae visible from home, on the fighter layer of Parkour Civilization. Seawatt doesn’t know how that makes him feel.

“Well. Duh.” AJ finally gets out, his foot kicking the side of the Master Apartment lazily. “We… you know. Of course I’d do that for you.”

Seawatt looks down at his lap, playing with his hands as his gaze softens.

“That’s… thank you.” He says, almost whispering. A tear wells up in the corner of his eye, and he blinks it away quickly, returning his gaze to the sky that looks so, so different from the one he remembers, and wonders what it will be like to find his way back home.

A hand comes to rest on his, and Seawatt gently grasps it, squeezing AJ’s fingers gently as a way of saying thank you without using any words.

He has a feeling he’ll be doing that a lot in the future, and for some reason, it brings another soft smile to his face instead of angry indignation.

Of course, AJ takes that as the perfect time to drop in a snarky remark.

“After that, I think I’d go and get all the men and women to date me,” he says, yelping when Seawatt reaches over and pinches him.

“You’re so stupid,” Seawatt tells him, but he’s still smiling, and AJ can tell, continuing on his stupid suggestion with a goofy grin only slightly obscured by his clanky helmet. “Y’know, my charm is already irresistible— but with Champion status? I mean, that’s gotta be at least ten bonus points, right?”

“I’m going home,” Seawatt tells him, but he makes no move to get up and leave.

Instead, he moves a little closer, and AJ just wraps a hand around his shoulders, both of them looking back up at the sky again.

In due time, they’ll have their shot at climbing past that boundless sky and up into the Old Man’s bloodied shoes. 

Right now, though, they just watch the stars in each other’s company.

　　

[bloatedandalone04]

He’s Got My Name

➪the one where everything a.j. does, he does for you.

Warnings: spoilers for takers 2010, once again - no one will read this, swearing, heists, robbing of a bank, mentions of guns, kissing, brief angst if you squint, mentions of cancer, reader is very ill, alcohol consumption, smoking, mentions of blood, pda, indication of smut

Word Count: 3.8k

Do not repost this anywhere, reblogs are fine♡

“Alright, sweetheart, it’s your turn,” John’s voice sounded throughout your ear piece. You quickly pulled open the door to the stairwell and made your way up to the floor that held a plethora of offices. “You remember what to say?”

“Of course,” you state quietly as you confidently walk down the rows of desks. The employees even didn’t give you a second glance as you passed by them and towards one of the empty cubicles. Your skirt and suit jacket made you look like you actually worked here, as did your heels and high bun. After glancing around at the few employees that were near, you pick up the phone from the desk and bring it to your ear that didn’t have the earpiece. 

You dial the number and wait a few seconds before you hear a voice answer, “News 14 hotline,”

“Hi, yes, I’m from the FedCal bank, downtown LA,” you say quickly in a panicked voice, making the pitch sound a bit higher for good measure. “There’s a robbery in progress.”

“Are they still in the bank?”

“Yes,” you answer sharply and make eye contact with a man across the room who was also on the phone. He gives you a concerned look, and you knew you had to wrap this up. “They’re a few floors above mine.”

The person was in the middle of asking another question when you hung up, dropped the phone back down onto the desk and stood up straight. Smoothing out your jacket, you stride back over to the door, smiling brightly at the few employees who looked up at you. 

You could hear the faint sounds of the guys upstairs as they robbed the place, and you all but slammed the door behind you once you were back in the stairwell. As you hopped down the stairs, you reached into your pocket when you felt your phone begin to vibrate. “Yes, my love?” You answer as you reach down to rid your feet of the heels, holding both of them in one hand as you continue to descend. 

“Angel,” A.J.’s voice rang through the phone and had you grinning to yourself. “Did you call the hotline?”

“I did,” you confirm as you neared the bottom floor, holding the phone away from you as a cough raked through your body. After swallowing the small amount of blood that pooled in your mouth, you bring it back to you. “They should be here any minute now.”

“Perfect,” he said. “You’re perfect.”

“So I’ve heard,” you tease as you enter the lobby of the bank, swinging your heels in your hand. You got a few odd looks as you walked along the marbled floor in your bare feet, but your lack of shoes would be the last thing on their mind once they found out what was happening just a few floors above them.

“Alright, get out of there, pretty girl,” A.J. said and you could just picture him blowing out the smoke from his cigarette. “Don’t get caught up when the cops arrive.”

“I won’t,” you promise and stick to it as you push open the front entrance of the bank and step out onto the sidewalk. “Be careful.”

“I will,” came his reply and you grinned when you noticed someone on the phone across the street, panic evident on their face as they were undoubtedly talking to the police and reporting the robbery. When you hear the unmistakable sound of a helicopter approaching, you knew he had to go. “I’ll see you later, baby.”

“See you soon,” you say and end the call, reaching up to let your hair down.  Turning the corner just in time to see the news chopper fly over the roof of the bank, you knew it was only a matter of seconds before A.J. began to play his role of an injured security guard in order to secure their ride out of there.

-

 Hours go by since the robbery, and after blowing up the news helicopter and parting ways, the group reunited a few hours later at the club they frequented. A.J. fell back against the leather armchair as John announced that Ghost was back and out of jail. “So I walk into my house and he’s standing there, drinking my whiskey. I was going to shoot him in the back of his head,”

“You should’ve,” Jake says as he hands A.J. a tall glass of bourbon. “The guy’s been out twenty four hours and already wants to do a job. He’s crazy.”

“Or he’s got huge balls,” Jesse offers from his spot on the stool. 

“Yeah, Ghost doesn’t play when it comes to money,” John adds, glancing over at Gordon. “He’s too smart for that.”

“The bastard’s not that smart,” A.J. rasps as he drinks the bourbon. “He’s clever, not smart.”

As the five of them conversed about the return of their former member, Rachel entered the room in a small black dress, looking nothing short of beautiful, but she wasn’t who A.J. was waiting for. 

Rachel smiled at the guys before sitting on Jake’s lap, and he grinned at the way his best friend got all flustered around his new fiancée. It was the same way A.J. acted around you when you first got engaged a few months back, and it was still how he acted now. 

He just couldn’t get enough of you. And that was obvious as his face lit up under the blue lights when he saw you enter the room a few seconds later. You were wearing a silver dress that sparkled under the LED lights and the slit in the fabric had him biting down hard on his lip as he caught sight of the exposed skin of your leg and a bit of your thigh. 

“Hi, boys,” you greet, purposely looking at everyone else other than A.J. 

Tease.

“Hey, sweetheart,” John said back as you smiled at him.

“Another successful heist?” You ask, already knowing the answer as you step further into the room. 

“You know it,” A.J. answers and you finally meet his eye. He looked so unbelievably fine in this lighting, and you held back a moan when beckoned you over to him with a curl of his finger. “C’mere, baby.”

You didn’t need to be told twice. 

You were crossing the room within seconds and sitting down on his lap, your legs draped over his thighs as he placed his free hand on your lower back. His lips attach to your neck as your arm wraps around his shoulder, your left hand coming to rest on his chest. Your big engagement ring was on full display and it sparkled under the blue lights of the VIP room. “I missed you today,” you said, already breathless at the feeling of his lips on your neck. 

“Mmm,” he hummed and brushed his nose against yours, turning your head so you were facing him. He kissed you softly, a groan leaving the back of his throat as he pulled you tighter against him. While you were a bit shy at first about kissing him like this in public, A.J. couldn’t care less, and he proved that by guiding you into countless makeout sessions that took place in front of the guys or just in the general public. After two and a half years, you grew to love engaging in PDA with him. “I missed you.”

You adjusted his bowtie as the other four guys fell into a conversation you couldn’t be bothered to listen in on, and neither could A.J. You were on his lap and wearing the most sinful dress he had ever seen on you, and he’s seen you in a lot of sinful dresses, how could he focus on anything else? 

“I hear you blew up the chopper after hijacking it,” you trail off, your mouth directly next to his ear as you two fell into your own little world. 

A.J. ran his hand up and down your hip, running his nose along your jaw as he nodded. “I did,”

You hummed and leaned closer to him. “I wish I could’ve been there to see that,” you whisper and make your voice as seductive as possible. You trace the skin below his ear with your tongue and feel the grunt that vibrated against his chest. “You know how sexy I find it when you do stuff like that.”

“I do,” he said and allowed your hand to grip the side of his face and turn his head so you could press your lips to his in a searing kiss. You run your tongue along his lower lip before his mouth opens and it brushes against his. He noisily breaks the kiss and you reach up to fix his hat that had become crooked during the whole event. “I wish you were there, too, baby, but this one was a bit too risky for you to have been able to stay. I would’ve loved to have had you on my lap while we were in the air, just like this, but I didn’t even like having you in the building with everything that’s going on right now.”

You shake your head and trace your index finger over the maze of freckles on his face. “You don’t need to worry about me,”

He gives you a pointed look and you sigh, eyeing the half empty glass in his hand.

You reached for it, but he was quicker and held it far away from you, his hand moving to tightly grip your waist in a warning. “C’mon,” you whine, giving him your best puppy dog eyes. “Just a sip.”

While they usually worked on him, nothing you could ever do would get him to allow you to drink even a drop of alcohol. “Not a chance, pretty girl,” 

You huffed and slumped against him, watching him down the rest of the bourbon before he set the glass on the table next to the chair. 

“Don’t get all upset with me,” he says once he sat back against the chair, his hand resuming its movement on your hip. His lips were glistening with remnants of the booze and you eyed them with a sense of want. 

And he knew that.

With a sigh, he uses his now free hand to brush away the fallen strands of hair from your face. “Alright,” he murmured, watching the way your eyes lit up. He was never good at denying you completely of the things you desired. “Have your taste.”

Once again, you didn’t need to be told twice. 

You lean in and eagerly press your lips to his, your tongue shooting out to run along his bourbon coated mouth. This way you weren’t actually consuming the drink, but you were getting the faintest taste of it. 

The kiss quickly heats up, and you were mainly licking his lips at this point. Once you are satisfied you pull away and press your forehead against his, knocking his hat out of place again. “Mm,” you hummed as you ran your tongue over your own lips, and A.J. held back a moan at the sight. “Thank you.”

He just grabbed his hat and tossed it next to the glass on the table. A.J. took your hand in his, his thumb turning the ring on your finger a few times as you snuggled up against him. “How are you feeling today?” He asked quietly so the others wouldn’t hear.

You lace your fingers with his and bring your joined hands up to your mouth to be able to press a kiss to the back of his. “I’m fine, Jay, really,” you tell him, glancing into his worry filled eyes. “It’s a better day today. It’s good.”

He wasn’t sure if he should believe your words, but you never gave him a reason to worry about you ever being untruthful to him, so he accepted your answer and pulled you even closer to him, suddenly wanting to take you back home and end the night early. 

And he would’ve done that, except when you excused yourself a few minutes later and he was met with the sight of Ghost, he knew his night had just begun. 

-

A.J.’s body was covered in a thin layer of sweat, as was yours, and he was struggling to hold himself above you while he got you to yet another release. 

It was nearing four in the morning, and a few minutes after he brought you to your peak, he was there as well and was finally able to collapse on the bed next to you. He falls onto his back and glances at out the window, the still open blinds doing nothing to keep out the four am moon. If your shared apartment was on one of the lower floors of the building, A.J. would’ve put the time aside to close the blinds and shield your body from any prying eyes, but seeing as it was on the thirteenth floor out of twenty, he didn’t feel the need. 

He huffs out uneven breaths, his arm blindly wrapping around your waist when he feels you move to lay your head on his bare chest. 

He had a long day, and it was nearing the end, with a new day just a few hours from now. After another successful heist, counting just how much money they received from said heist, finding out about a former ally being released from prison, and being roped into another job from said ally, he was finally able to end his day in the way he had grown so accustomed to. 

A.J. loved spending hours on end with you wrapped up in the sheets, and that was before he allowed body to fully relax and welcome sleep to take over. As cliché as it sounded, your bodies really did fit so well together. He couldn’t remember the last time he had let himself fall this deeply for someone, in fact, he was sure he had never felt the things he did with you before.

Long story short; you had become his entire world just five months into the relationship. You were everything to him.

Once his breathing went back to normal, A.J. turned his head and ran his fingers through your hair, which was a bit damp from sweat. Your eyes were already on him, and he couldn’t help himself as he leaned down to press what felt like the millionth kiss of the night to your lips.

He sighed when he pulled away. “I should tell you before you find out from someone else,” he began.

You lifted your head so it was resting higher on his shoulder now. “Tell me what?”

A.J. ran his free hand through his messy, post-sex hair. “Ghost is out now,” he says and you furrow your brows. “Let him out this morning.”

You bit down on your kiss swollen lip. “Why didn’t you tell me this before?”

“Because he was released during the heist. I didn’t find out about it until a few hours ago,” he explained, running his fingers up and down your bare back. “He showed up at the club tonight.”

You prop yourself up on your elbow. “He did?” You ask and he nods. “Where was I?”

“Bathroom,” he hummed, his eyes flickering all over your face. He wanted to tell you how beautiful you looked, but held off as it wasn’t really the time to get into that right now. Damn Ghost. Still, he asked, “You took your meds, right? After you had that bourbon?”

You scoffed. “I didn’t even get a fair taste of it,”

“But you still thanked me for it,” he grinned and you rolled your eyes. “You took them, yeah?”

“Yeah,” you confirmed and tangled your legs with his. “What did Ghost want? When he came to the club?” 

A.J. sighed again. “He wants us to help him do a job,”

“A job? He hasn’t even been out for a day yet,”

“Yeah, well, no one ever accused him of being smart,”

You laughed quietly, your hand tracing over the ink on his left arm. Underneath the faded Yak, in much more vibrant and fresher ink, was your first and middle name. It was in a cursive font, and the two names were spaced out enough that it wrapped around half of his bicep, and could be easily read to anyone who looked at him head on. “Can I ask you to promise me something?”

“You know you can, pretty girl,” he answered quietly. 

“Don’t do anything too reckless, please,” you mumbled against the side of his neck. “You never do more than one job a year, let alone one right after the other. Just, please, be careful. Nothing too crazy, please.”

A.J. laughed, but not in a mocking way. He couldn’t deny the warm feeling that took over his body at your undying concern for him, despite him doing this kind of work for many years now. He was a rookie at it during the early years, but now he was more experienced, and he had you to come home to. “You worried about me, pretty girl?” 

“I always am,” you reply and watch his mouth open, but you cut him off before he could even say anything, “And, yeah, I know you’ll always come back to me and I know about the risks and blah blah blah. Still doesn’t change anything.”

A.J. laughed again, rolling you onto your back and hovering over you once more. “I appreciate your concern, baby. And I love you for it,” he leaned down to press a lingering kiss to your lips, and you held back the tiny moan that threatened to escape. “And I promise I won’t do anything too reckless or crazy this time around. I’ve got you to come back to, remember?”

-

Once A.J. finished explaining Ghost’s plan to you, you shake your head and look up from your place on the ottoman. “I don’t like it,” you say and lift your head to meet his eyes. “I don’t like it at all. It seems like he’s making you guys do all the work while he gets the easy job.”

A.J. nods, lifting his hand in a form of gesture to his words, “Well, he was in jail, baby,” he points out. “It makes sense that he’d want to be more careful this time around.” 

“Still,” you mumble. “I don’t like him getting you to do his dirty work. This was his idea, right? He came up with it? So why isn’t he more involved in it? Wouldn’t it make more sense for him to be more active in this? He knows you guys have already done your job for the year. I mean, he came up with the rule to never do more than one heist a year.”

“Yeah, well, if Ghost needs money, then he’s getting money,” he muttered. “And with the amount he says are in these trucks, I’m not opposed to going all in on this one.”

You raise a brow and fold your arms across your chest. “How much did he say is in them?”

He met your eye as he said, “Twenty million,”

Your eyes widen and you blow out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. “Jesus,”

“Yeah, that’s why I’m not jumping at the idea of turning this one down,”

Nodding, you play with your ring. “I get it, really, I do,” you start, trying to figure out how to voice your concerns about the whole thing. “But why do you need that much money? You got a lot from the bank yesterday, isn’t that more than enough to get you through the year?”

“It is,” he agreed and brought the whiskey glass up to his lips. “Well over being more than enough to get us through the year.”

Your heart swelled when he corrected your mistake of not including yourself in your prior question. “Then why are you so adamant on doing this job? You know you don’t owe him anything, right? Ghost got himself into prison, not you or the other guys.”

“I know, pretty girl, and that’s not why I’m doing this,” he finished the drink and set the glass down on the mini bar you and he had in the living room of your apartment. “Think about it. Twenty million? Think about how much that will help with your medication and treatment and bills. I’ve saved up most of the cost, but with this, you could be cancer free by the end of the year.” 

You winced at that, hating the fact that he was doing this for you, to make sure you get the treatment you were required to have to save your life. You were already two surgeries in, and well over a hundred thousand dollars in medical bills, but this was too much. 

It was a risky job, and you had an awful feeling about all of it. “You can’t do this for me, A.J.,” you begged, staring up at him. 

He just gave you a look that left no room for arguments. “I can,” he said and you felt so small under his gaze. “And I am. If it means getting you back into that hospital for what could be your final few months of treatment, then I’m doing it. No questions.”

“A.J., think about this,” you pleaded. “You don’t need to do this for me. You can’t.”

“I need you,” he grunted, running his hand through his hair. His hat had been discarded a little while ago, but his hair was still a bit messy from it. “I’m not doing this without you.”

“Doing what?” You asked desperately. 

“Living,” he answered like it was the easiest question he had ever been asked during the twenty nine years of his life. “You’re sick, and the meds aren’t working. Not as much as the surgery will. This will save you, don’t you get that?”

You shook your head and looked down at the floor, unsure of what to say. 

A.J. stepped towards you and crouched down, taking your hands in his. “You won’t have to be in pain anymore, and we can finally continue our lives together, debt and cancer free. Don’t you want that?”

You furrowed your brows. “Of course I want that,” 

He nodded and laced your fingers together. “Then that’s it,” he stated. “I’m doing this job, and I’m getting you the money that is needed to keep you in my life.”

You wanted to fight him on this some more, but you knew his mind was made up. And it had been since the minute Ghost told him about the plan. 

So, instead of fighting him, you wrap your arms around his neck and press your lips to his. He stands up with you in his arms, his lips meshing against yours in a needy kiss. “I love you,” you murmur against his mouth. “I love you so much.”

“I love you,” he said back and gently guided you towards the couch, letting his body hover over yours once you landed on the cushion with a soft thud.

-

Part 2

[sophsun1]

Queer as Folk – 2.19: Bowling for Equality