#aisling oc

[loonybun]

Meeting Aisling (CYOA) 3

hiiiii ough this took forever :( don’t feel like it’s super good but new character! yay!!! he’s normal guys i promise (fingers crossed behind my back)

contains: captivity, faerie carewhumper, dryad guy of unknown whumperee status, references to past abduction(s), fantasy whump, fantasy setting, manhandling.

—————————————————

You decide to look for anything that could help you escape— or at the very least tell you where you are. The window is the obvious thing to look at, considering it’s the only other possible way out of the room. The gaps in the vines are big enough for you to stick your hands through, but you probably couldn’t get much further.

From the holes, you can see a village beneath the structure you’re in. People. There are people here. If you made enough noise, maybe someone would come and save you.

The trees around the village are thicker than most of the houses. Massive structures that you can’t even see the tops of. Branches as big as trains.

Even if the window wasn’t obscured, it’d be too high to jump from. You’re not going to have much luck with it.

You walk over to the vanity in one of the other parts of the room. The mirror greets you with your disgruntled state, twigs and flowers sticking out of tangled hair.

The table is covered with all kinds of trinkets. Bells, flower circlets, crystals, little animals made of glass. It may have been a charming collection under different circumstances, but unfortunately you don’t have time to focus on something so small.

Besides the vanity, there’s also a desk filled to the brim with papers and books. Bottles of ink line the shelf above it. Great, the weirdo that kidnapped you is a writer. You can definitely use that to escape. Maybe threaten to set some of his manuscripts on fire or give him a bad review. That’ll show him.

You groan and go back over to the bed, flopping onto the soft mattress. Despite your amazing investigative skills, you’d somehow neglected the plate of fresh berries on the bedside table. Just looking at them makes your mouth water.

If you’re going to escape, you have to have some fuel in you, right?

As you reach out to grab one of the fruits, something snaps around your wrist and yanks it away.

“Don’t eat that.”

The roots around your arm squeeze it tightly. After you recover from the shock, you turn to face the source of the voice.

The tree.

The fucking tree.

Or what was a tree five seconds ago, at least. Of course. Why not? Magical bug men, talking trees, sure. Just throw in a dancing bear at this point.

The tree— or man, you’re not sure what to describe it as— is giving you a hard glare. It’s entirely made of wood, save for its flowering hair and a few rogue blossoms. If looks could kill, you have a feeling that they wouldn’t be able to put your corpse back together.

It slowly retracts its branches from your wrist, forming them back into a more hand-like structure.

He inspects you for a moment.

“…His standards get lower by the hour. Goodness, where did he even find you? A dog park?” The— whatever he is, scoffs.

Your cheeks flush with embarrassment. He wasn’t wrong, you did look like a mess, but that doesn’t mean his words don’t hurt.

He plucks a leaf from your hair and grins. “I mean, this is just sad. And I thought the last one was bad… No, you take the cake. Anyways, how long were you planning on staying here? Come up with any daring escape plans yet? Please, do tell.”

Even if you had, telling this thing seemed like a bad idea. He definitely doesn’t have your best interests in mind.

“What?” The man(?) frowns. “Too harsh? Alright, fine. I should have just started with names. Have you given yours to him yet?”

You shake your head.

“Good. Don’t. Anyways, since you won’t have much of a use for it anyways, mine is Oleander. You don’t have to give me yours if you don’t want to. I’d like to keep this interaction as quick as possible. Feel free to ask questions though. Better to hear it than learn from experience in this case.”

Well, you sure had a lot of questions. Why are you here? Where is here? What is he? What snatched you away to begin with?

“Ohh, you’re one of the panicky ones. Alright, well, for starters, you’re in a tree. Or a palace. Whatever you’d like to imagine it as, honestly. I don’t know the exact reason you were brought here, but I have a few guesses. Let’s just say none of them are situations anyone would want to be in.” He keeps up with your rapid-fire, only taking a moment in between questions.

“I’m what’s called a dryad. Essentially, a plant with a consciousness and a body created by magic— You do know what magic is, right? Yes? Alright, that saves some explaining. I don’t really want to get into detail about what a faerie is, but that’s what the other man was. Anyways, I’ll be brief, I don’t want you here, and I’m assuming you don’t want to be here either, right?”

You nod.

“Good. That saves me some trouble. I’m going to help you escape. Now, he’s probably going to be back within the next ten or so minutes. You’re not going to mention me to him, understand? He doesn’t know I exist, and I want to keep it that way.”

After you give another nod, he sighs in relief. You watch as Oleander moves back towards the center of the room, his wood skin slowly morphing, bending, and reshaping until you’re left “alone” again.

Your chest feels lighter. There’s still a chance to escape. While you’re still not entirely sure you can trust your new companion, he’s still a failsafe if you can’t find another way out of here.

Just a few minutes later, the door swings open and a familiar person enters the room.

Person? Was that right?

Ai smiles at you, slit pupils you hadn’t noticed previously practically glistening when he spots you at the far end of the room.

“Oh— Hi! You’re awake now? Is everything alright? You look a little shaken up…” He flutters over to you.

Flutters. Right. Wings.

You can’t help but stare. Whatever you’d met in the woods hardly resembled him now. The fae in front of you dawned a long, fairly intricate cloak. His skin— or fur, it’s honestly hard to tell, is a soft pink. He’s not unpleasant looking in any sense, just… Unusual. If it weren’t for the sharp teeth, he’d almost look approachable.

He’s acting like he’s actually concerned about you. Like he didn’t just take you to an entire new dimension. Like there’s any other reason that you’d be upset. You just continue to stare, unable to create a response with the knot in your throat.

Ai sets a hand on your shoulder reassuringly. “Upset? That’s okay. I know it’s a lot for you to take in. I hope you don’t feel like I was trying to deceive you before in the woods… I just thought you seemed interesting! I wanted to get to know you a bit before… Well, before all of this. I didn’t mean to rush you.” You’re hardly paying attention to what he’s saying. He kidnapped you. Of course you’re upset!

“You probably feel scared, don’t you? I… I want to say that I won’t hurt you. Those aren’t my intentions with you. Why don’t we get to know each other a bit better? I want to understand you, and I want you to be able to understand me, too. I know this isn’t the best first impression… But I really didn’t want to have to mess with your memories again. I want to do it right this time.”

This is insane. You can’t read him. What does he want from you? He said he doesn’t want to hurt you, but none of his actions so far have even slightly supported that. He abducted you. He chased you through the fucking woods. What other reason could he possibly have for keeping you here?

“Go ahead, ask me anything.”

taglist: @whumpy-wyrms @inkwell-and-dagger @lordcatwich @kawaii-cakes @enigmawriteswhump (let me know if you want to be added!!!)

[creppersfunpalooza]

little scenario doodles based on @radvercity and i’s conversation ignore these please

[pigeonwhumps]

Guilt

Immortal Cannon Fodder masterlist

Taglist: @extrabitterbrain @wolfeyedwitch @fuckcapitalismasshole @ghost-whump @whump-tr0pes

@rainbowsandwhumperflies @painful-pooch @i-eat-worlds @a-funeral-romance @rainydaywhump

@augustofwhump

August of Whump bonus prompt: guilt

Aaron is refused permission to join the search for Phoenix when they're crucified, and they're declared dead. This is the next six months for Aaron.

First scene is canon, everything after that is set in the Gemma saves Phoenix AU, where Gemma saves Phoenix after they've been crucified continuously for 6 months.

2k words

CWs: immortal whumpee, presumed dead, guilt, grief, transphobia, ableism (both very brief), low self-worth

"I'm joining the search party for Phoenix Costello."

"No, you're not."

Aaron blinks and balls his fists. "What? They're on my team, they're my responsibility!"

Their boss, the head of the medical bay, sighs. "You're needed here. The rest of their team are capable of searching, and if they need a medic they'll bring them back here or you can join them in the field then. There's no use you being on the other side of the city when they're found."

There's multiple flaws there, and he catches the implications of the 'if'. They might be dead. They might be gone. They might just have left, although Aaron doesn't believe that at all. If they were just leaving they wouldn't have taken their tracker.

That's not important though.

"There's a gang of serial killers out there!" he yells, voice cracking.

"That's exactly why I need you to stay here. We're overloaded as it is, and I can't lose you. You're one of our best."

"But–"

"Look. They're immortal, right?" Aaron nods stiffly. "Chances are, they're just trapped. The rest of the team will find them, and they'll be back in no time, traumatised and injured possibly but alive. Let them search and do your job, okay?" He nods again, unsure what else he can do now, and his boss smiles wearily. "Thank you. Now, is there anything else I can do for you?"

Aaron shakes their head. They don't know what else to do.

_

One week passes.

_

Two weeks.

_

A month.

_

Two.

_

Three months with no sign. No-one on the medical staff has had so much as a chance to breathe in that time. Due to how high the rate of injuries and deaths has been, and the presence of The Chosen Ones still out there, Phoenix is declared dead.

Probably dead.

Aaron is numb. He... he barely even knew Phoenix (he should have, he should have gotten to know them better), but they were his responsibility, on his team, the few times he has seen them... and he just can't believe that they're dead.

They're 18. Still a child, really.

Maybe they're not. It's always possible. Sure, nobody knows how their immortality works, if they really will resurrect forever, but again: nobody knows how their immortality works.

He does his duties as he should, but he can't feel anything. They're dead. His boss tries to give him time off but it doesn't work, he has to do something.

He just... how did he let it all go so wrong?

_

Phoenix's family's house is a terraced house on a quiet street. Three bedrooms at a guess. Nice, neat front lawn, nice neat painting. Boring. Not Phoenix.

Aaron glances at Aisling, who gestures for him to head down the path first. He needs to tell Phoenix's family about their death. Apparent death. He volunteered, and is very grateful that Aisling agreed to come with him because no-one else on Phoenix's team would.

They didn't seem very upset either.

Will Phoenix's parents be? Joseph told him of the campaign group they're in charge of, but he's not sure how extreme their views are. Whether they extend to their eldest child.

He rings the shiny doorbell. A few seconds, and then a teenager answers. They look very like Phoenix, although with shorter, curlier hair, and with a sinking sensation Aaron realises this is probably their sister.

"Are you Alicia?" She nods. "I'm Aaron, and this is Aisling. We're from HAL, and we need to talk to you about Phoenix. Can we come in?"

Alicia nods, leading them to the front room and gesturing for them to sit, before she holds up a finger and dashes upstairs. Aaron looks around. The place looks more like a showroom than anything. You'd never know a teenager lived here, and the only sign of children once having been here is the posed photo on the mantelpiece. Aaron isn't an expert, but he's pretty sure Alicia's smile is forced. There's no sign of Phoenix ever having existed.

Alicia returns with a tablet in hand and sits down on the sofa opposite, typing. "Sorry. What about Phoenix? Are they okay?"

Aaron swallows. "I– Phoenix– Alicia, I'm so sorry."

She shakes her head. "No."

"They were– it was–" They had a whole speech planned about what probably happened but they can't get it out. Not with Alicia watching them, eyes begging, pleading, for him not to say it. "We didn't find a body. But with the serial killers out there and deaths piling up, we don't think..."

Alicia's shaking her head fiercely now, and she drops her tablet, starting to rock. And she wails.

Aaron isn't sure what to do. He's not leaving, not now, he wouldn't even if he didn't need to wait for her parents. But he doesn't know what he can do except let her process.

"I'm sorry," Aisling whispers. "I'm so sorry."

Alicia covers her ears and continues to wail.

After a time, the lock rattles on the front door and it opens.

"Stop making that awful noise, Alicia," says a woman sharply. "I've told you before, if you can't stop– oh." She stops in the entrance to the living room. "Who do you think you are, sitting in our house and upsetting our daughter like this?"

They both stand, Aisling holding out a hand.

"Hello. I'm Aisling O'Connor, and this is Aaron Thomas, from HAL. We have some sad news about your child, Phoenix."

A man enters the room, raising an eyebrow. This must be Mr Costello. They're both very standoffish, which Aaron supposes is fair.

"Fiona? She's still going by that foolishness? What has she done now?"

So, they're transphobic as well as running a hate campaign.

"I'm afraid they're dead, Mr Costello. We believe they were killed by members of The Chosen Ones. I'm so sorry for your loss."

"Yes. Well. Thank you." Both of the older Costellos look stunned, and Aaron could almost feel satisfied about that. Almost. In other circumstances. "We will, of course, inform your organisation of the funeral arrangements if you would like to send representatives. Will you leave us to grieve in private?"

"Of course." They both rise, and Aaron slips the piece of paper he's been scribbling on with both his and Aisling's phone numbers into Alicia's hand. Just in case she needs someone. "Apologies again for your loss."

And he walks out the door. He has, at least, resisted the urge to punch either member of the couple, so at least that's something.

He wonders if he'll be allowed to attend the funeral. He hopes so.

_

The funeral is held the next week. Thankfully there's no open casket with no body, but it's still a bit strange to him. Phoenix's parents are clearly very religious, where he never has been so much, and it makes him uncomfortable.

Not to mention the consistent misgendering. Even in death, Phoenix's parents won't respect them.

Aaron's never felt so grateful for their own family.

There's so many dry eyes here today. So much performance. Aaron gets the feeling that Abbie, Indigo and Segun didn't really care about Phoenix at all, and it makes them regret their lack of knowing Phoenix all the more.

Except Alicia's speech. That's beautiful, and heartbreaking, and she doesn't misgender her sibling once. She's been moving her belongings into Aisling's flat gradually for weeks, and Aaron can see that what she feared will likely come true – despite the shining eyes and crying throughout the audience, Alicia's father's face is turning puce.

(She explains, later, that it's not just the speech, or the respect for Phoenix, but the use of her AAC app at all, and Aaron has to use all of his strength not to turn around and murder her parents for that.)

_

"I hear you're thinking of quitting," is how Joseph announces himself at the table in the diner.

Aaron saw him coming, of course, they wouldn't sit with their back to the door, but they didn't register it. He sets the pizzas down on the table – one spicy vegetable, one sausage and pepperoni, and a little tub of mozzarella sticks to share.

"How do you know that?"

Joseph sighs. "You texted me last night. Drunk, I think. You don't usually drink and you're the last person I'd expect to quit. What's going on? Is this about Phoenix?"

Aaron nods, taking a large bite of pizza to hide their emotions. "What's the point of being a hero if I'm just going to obey orders that get people killed?"

"You didn't kill Phoenix."

Aaron shakes their head. "If I'd searched too, I might have found them, they might still be alive."

"Aaron. Listen to me. You didn't kill them. Or get them killed, for that matter. You saved people. You told me your boss didn't let you go because you're one of his best medics. It's true. Please, Aaron, think about this. Don't quit."

"I still got them killed. Heroes don't do that."

Joseph reaches across and squeezes their arm. "Nobody can be perfect all the time. It was their murderers who killed them, not you. You do so much good, and I, for one, would be devastated if you left because you made one mistake that might not even have led to anything."

"But they're still dead."

That's the crux of the matter. They're dead, they were on his team, and it's his fault. And he had to sit through a whole funeral service of them being misgendered, and he can't help thinking he should've gotten to know them, should've given them someone else who cared. God knows no-one else seems to.

If he'd known them, if he'd searched, would they still be alive? But instead he just followed orders and let them die.

He sobs.

Joseph comes around the table and pulls them into his arms.

"Give yourself a few months, 'kay? Don't make this decision on the spur of the moment, when you're so emotional. Wait until you can think again."

Aaron nods into Joseph's warm, soft arms. He can try.

_

Aaron is fetching a plate of biscuits from the kitchen when Gemma enters the flat.

He always feels a little uncomfortable with this team on his own. It's not his team, or his flat, he's intruding. It wasn't their idea to invite him. Sometimes Alicia comes too but not today, she doesn't feel up to meeting this new person that Gemma's saved and he doesn't blame her.

He's happy for them. Really. But Aaron can't help wishing he had done the same for Phoenix.

"Hi Gemma! And this must be Phoenix."

No. No, he must've misheard Kai, he must've... is this why they've all been giving him weird looks since he arrived? It has to be a different Phoenix, surely.

They step out of the kitchen, hands trembling, and feel the blood drain from their face. There's a shattering sound beneath their feet but they barely register it.

There, wringing their hands together, looking a little older and more traumatised but still recognisably them, is Phoenix.

"Phoenix? You're alive?"

Phoenix turns to look at them, the same shock mirrored on their face.

"Aaron?"

"I'm sorry," they whisper, "I'm sorry. They wouldn't let me on the search and rescue mission but I should have anyway, I'm so sorry. How did you– why are you–"

At some point they've moved forward, and Phoenix is within touching distance, looking startled, tears in their eyes.

"Can I give you a hug?"

Phoenix nods, almost falling into their arms. He hugs them tightly.

"I'm so, so fucking sorry."

"'s okay. I didn't deserve to be rescued anyway."

He squeezes them tighter. "That's bullshit, kid." Phoenix shakes their head. "Your sister misses you desperately."

"She, um, she does? Why?"

"Because she loves you."

"Oh."

Aaron has learned various things over the past six months about how they've been treated over their life, and their rock-bottom self-esteem shouldn't shock him but it does.

"People care about you, Phoenix. Don't ever forget that."

[howgalling]

i made an ultrakill secret boss OC for fun. An angel who fell in love w/ a human (before humanity fell) and they were both damned for it and banished to hell <3

[annlytical]

SHES ARRIVED! LOOK AT THIS! Absolutely worth every single penny-

Art, of course, done by Tracy J Butler! @lackadaisycats

[ginsays]

modern looks for my funky little guy ... including a natural granola colorway. aisling's most shocking lore is just that he is actually an unnatural redhead

[wewerebornsextuplets]

everyone should think too deeply about small oc details forever btw. it makes life better

[aislingsurrow]

Glamtober

Day 3

Match Your Mount!

"The fluffiest high-five yer ever gonna get!"

Bonus! Uwah!

[maziecrazycloud]

“Led Zeppelin are gods among men, and Aisling Cowan in their queen.”

-

In May of 1971, CREEM magazine’s journalist: Oliver Thorne set out to try and discern just who Aisling Cowan was, the elusive female guitarist of the intrepid LZ. Here is his interview and cover of LZ’s performance in Usher Hall, Edinburgh, Scotland. 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

-

(OBVIOUSLY ALL OF THIS ISNT REAL FOR LEGAL REASONS) I hope you guys like it though. Both Aisling and Oliver are my OCs that I have created for the story I have been writing known as “Forest of Time”. In which a girl from the twenty first century gets pulled back into 1969 by the Seelie Court of Fae. She get sucked into the world of rock n roll when she meets Jimmy Page by chance. Or not👀. Strange magick is afoot. She changes history on accident and becomes a part of LZ, for good or worse. I haven’t written this specific part of the story yet. But I couldn’t resist creating just how much Aisling changes history. Enjoy!

Here is the link to my story if you’re interested!: https://archiveofourown.org/works/42940200/chapters/107881455

I really flexed my understanding of newspapers and i love CREEM, so ofc I had to make an alternate universe version of the magazine to fit my AU of Zeppelin! Cheers and Dark Tidings.🎸👹 (this may be the best thing ive ever made)

-

Article below!

Non vintage textured illustration of Aisling✌️

[starling-illu]

my original character, Aisling, a triple goddess

[samwise1548]

Oc challenge!!

From top left to bottom right: David Whels, Aisling, Leila Suleiman, Archie, and Sarab

------

[ID: A drawing of 5 original characters drawn for a specific purpose.

The first, David, is labeled as the "Favorite OC." David is a white male with short blond hair and an excited expression. The second is Aisling, labeled the "First OC." She is a My Little Pony original character with pink base and magenta hair tied in a bun. She's talking with David happily. Lastly on the top row is Leila, with the label of "Latest OC." She's a brown skin hijabi. Her expression is shocked as she observes the talking pony next to her.

The row below starts with Archie, the "Easiest to draw OC." He is a purple spider with a top hat and bowtie. He shields his face from the man next to him, Sarab. Sarab is given the label of "Hardest to draw OC." Which is apparent with how much more complex his design and style are to the rest of the characters. He has blue, wrinkled skin and green hair drooping over his eyes. Curling horns grow from the sides of his head, and his wings peak out from behind him.

Lastly is a drawing of the artist in black and white, excitedly showing off their original characters to the audience. \End ID]

[loonybun]

Meeting Aisling (CYOA) 2

sorry i am a VERY slow writer and work on bursts of inspiration and writing sprints so this took FOREVER to write. anyways here it is.

contains: more fae shenanigans, implied magical manipulation, exhaustion, fae carewhumper, invasion of personal space, abduction, The Horrors (fun stuff because my canon doesn’t 100% follow traditional folklore as i like to add things in), just creepy vibes but i’m sure everything will be fine and he’s actually 100% harmless. most definitely!!!

—————————————————

“A photographer?”

He lights up and grabs onto your hands. Almost immediately, he lets go, but the fuzzy sensation dwells on your palm. The strange man continues on.

“That’s not something you hear everyday! I don’t know a ton about photography, but I may have seen some of your… Your picture-things! I never caught your name, actually. Would you mind giving that to me really quick?”

You can’t place why, but words send a shudder down your spine. Somewhere deep in your mind an alarm rings.

He’s still a stranger. You don’t give out your name to strangers. That’s just common sense. Sure, he seems friendly enough, but better safe than sorry. Instead, you give him the handle you use for your photography. That’s probably the main reason he was asking, anyway.

He’s obviously disappointed, but you decide to ignore the guilt. There’s an awkward silence before he speaks up again.

“—Well, follow me. Let’s get you somewhere safer, okay? You can call me Ai, by the way, but not like the ones you see with. Weird little nickname, but it’s what most people call me anyways. Unless we want to be formal with each other, but that doesn’t really seem necessary.”

His enthusiasm returns, and before you know it you’re practically chasing him through the dark forest. It’s hard to catch up with the way he deftly darts from tree to tree. You can hear him laugh as you fail to match his pace, and the sound echoes through the forest like the chimes of crystal bells, bouncing off of the trees.

Eventually, you manage to run up to him. He’d stopped to wait for you, and now he was sitting in the grass, grinning up at you strangely. The exhaustion overwhelms any urge to find the source of your anxiety. You’re still trying to catch your breath, and you soon find yourself down beside him. Ai pats the top of your head, patiently waiting for you to regain your strength.

“…The grass here seems so much softer. You don’t know why, do you? That’s okay. We’ll find out soon.” He murmurs, combing through your hair with nimble fingers. “Do you have your camera? You should take a picture-thing. This is a nice little spot. You probably won’t be able to find it again.”

You hadn’t even noticed, too concentrated on the soothing tones in his voice. You’d nearly fallen asleep right there. Oh god, you just cuddled up to a complete stranger. After a moment, you pull your thoughts together and focus on the area around you.

There’s still no signs of the campsites, but the area he’s brought you to feels safe all the same. Moonbeams stream in through gaps in the canopy above. The white light pours onto the plants around, casting them all into an ethereal state. You take your camera out of your bag and turn it on, eagerly looking at the screen—

But something’s wrong. Pink ebbs into the edges of the screen, and the middle keeps splitting into bars. You point the camera around in an effort to reset it. Ai curiously watches you struggle, that same odd smile still placed on his lips. For a moment, the camera pans over to him— or what should have been him. The bars on the screen seem to multiply and crack, barely obscuring something unfathomable and buglike. You look at the terrifyingly beautiful entity on the screen, then back to him. You hadn’t noticed his teeth before. They really shouldn’t be that sharp, should they?

“Is something wrong?” His voice still sounds so sweet. It makes you feel woozy. Sick. That thing wasn’t human. Where were you? The woods hadn’t even began to thin out. Had he taken you further in?

You shake your head, but you must have taken too long to respond. Once again, he’s by your side, a hand on your shoulder and the other positioned in front of the lens. He’s not smiling anymore.

Ai’s hold on your shoulder becomes firm, uncomfortable and tight.

“…—I didn’t… I didn’t know it did that. Huh. Well— I’ve dragged this out long enough. I was hoping you’d get a few last photos of your world though… Just as a keepsake. Oh well, Maybe it’s for the best.”

A surge of panic shoots through your body. You immediately push him away, stumbling back in the process. You need to get away. Fast. Whatever he meant couldn’t be anything good. Did he want to kill you? Why did he wait?

He’s picked up on your panic.

“Woah, woah! Hey! I don’t want to hurt you. It’s not like that, okay? I just— I need you to come with me. It’ll be an adventure! Humans still like adventuring, right?” The thing’s slowly getting closer to you. You don’t wait to hear whatever he says next. All you can do now is run. Keep running until you find some way out of this place.

Despite your exhaustion, you keep moving, weaving between the trees and taking as many turns as possible. Anything to get him off of your trail. You can hear him behind you. It doesn’t seem like he’s running, though. There aren’t any footsteps.

WHAM. A branch collides with your forehead, and you immediately fall back onto the ground. You need to get up. You need to get up now.

It’s already too late.

He scoops you up effortlessly, ignoring your desperate flailing.

“Oh, ouch... That looked like it hurt. Hopefully it’ll only leave a small bruise. Anyways, I feel like I’m leaving a really bad first impression. You wouldn’t mind giving me a do-over once we get home, right? I mean— I feel like it was going well! Up until you got all freaked out. Not your fault, but next time maybe don’t run off like that.”

He doesn’t look human anymore. You’re looking into the slit pupils of some otherworldly being. It hurts to think too hard about it. It hurts to think at all.

He carries you back over to the spot you two had been before, taking you a bit further. Dread fills your stomach as he steps into the center of a ring of mushrooms and the world begins to melt around you. You can hear him whispering some reassurances to you, but you can’t process what he’s saying. Your eyelids feel so heavy. You don’t resist when he kisses your forehead, causing you to drift away entirely.

Sleep takes you under. It’s a relief. Nothing hurts anymore.

-

-

Your eyelids slowly open, glazing over your new surroundings. Sunlight streams in through a hole in the ceiling, as well as a window that has been thoroughly wrapped in vines. The bedroom is luxurious, but definitely not in any traditional sense.

There’s a large tree in the very center of the room. It’s a grandiose thing with slim leaves and dramatic pink flowers. It looks well taken care of. Still, it’s a weird decoration to have in the middle of a bedroom.

The man— or whatever it was— that brought you here is nowhere to be seen. That’s probably for the best. It gives you more time to find a way out of this place.

You notice the door parallel to the bed and immediately make your way over to it. Locked. You’re not sure what else you expected.

So that settles it. You’ve been taken hostage by some weird magical creature for god knows why and you have no way of knowing where you are. At least he hadn’t restrained you. You could still escape. Things weren’t over yet.

taglist (let me know if you’d like to be added!!): @whumpy-wyrms @inkwell-and-dagger @lordcatwich @kawaii-cakes

[creppersfunpalooza]

sorry going to bed now but fun fact i made canon a few days ago: aisling’s skin is not skin textured. he is slightly fuzzy. brought to you by the fact that he’s a moth 👍 very subtly. he’s probably the most humanoid faerie in his family lineage lol. i debated giving him more moth like features but i think he’d also want his form to be as humanoid as possible. he maaay have antennae he tucks into his hair or something but we’ll see. i may tweak his design a bit actually….

he’s based on luna moths btw!!! it’s most obvious with his wings but i reeeaally need to make it more clear. idk why he’s pink though he’s just like that i guess. let’s ignore it and move on 👍

[pigeonwhumps]

Faint at First Sight

Finally, I can share my entry for the Guys in Distress zine with y'all! You can still get leftover copies of the whole print zine and merchandise while they're available, as well as pdf zines until the end of the year, so please do if you want to, it's very good!

Thanks to @blackberry-bloody for beta-ing and for the title!

Taglist: @extrabitterbrain @wolfeyedwitch @zineofgid

Kai is kidnapped during his first mission.

5k

CWs: hero whump, hostage, torture, captivity, bound and gagged, blood, burns, electrocution, shock collar, stress position, fear of abandonment, forced to watch, non-con nudity (non-sexual), dehydration, mentioned starvation, forced to stay awake, threatened drugging

"Got it!" hisses Lian, as the slot widens under his control. Kai stretches out a hand and the memory card comes flying out, almost braining him. Lian snatches it out of the air and examines it quickly.

"Definitely what we're after. I think. Now let's get out of here before–"

"Code red," says Morfydd in Kai's ear. "Solar Flare's down, they're heading your way."

Kai's body turns cold. Gemma. No.

Lian tugs at his arm. "Snap out of it, Wolfman, we need to go. Do your wolf thing and run."

Kai clenches his fists and transforms, taking a few tries but getting there in the end, senses sharpening, colours dulling. He lopes along, keeping pace with Lian, who knows the way out.

They turn a corridor and two of Moonstar's minions stand in their way. Kai uses his telekinesis to push one minion into the other, sending them both crumpling to the floor, and he and Lian run back the way they came. An alarm wails and the bulkhead doors slam shut as they re-enter the lab.

"Fuck," mutters Lian, "what do we do now? There has to be a way out."

Kai paces, looking around, and spots it the same time Lian does. An air vent halfway up the wall.

"Wolfman," says Lian slowly, "I'm going to climb on your back and open that. You can climb up when you're back in human form, right?"

Kai gives an affirmative bark and Lian uses a chair to clamber onto his back, ripping the air vent off the wall with all his superstrength. Kai stands as still as possible, moving furniture around the room to create a step for himself. They don't have time to wait while he does it. Moonstar or his minions could be here any minute – Kai can already hear someone cutting through the metal.

The grate falls to the floor with a clatter, and Lian pulls himself up into the vent.

"Come on, Wolfman. Your turn."

Kai transforms back to human, colour vision returning and smell and hearing diminishing as he does so, just as the metal screeches and bursts open.

Kai scrambles up onto the table, a little disoriented from the change, and jumps for Lian's hands.

He crashes to the ground with a thump and lets out a sharp gasp as pain shoots up his back. His tailbone. Fuck. He tries to get to his feet but someone grabs him and hauls him upright, holding his hands behind his back.

"Get the fuck off me!" Kai snarls, trying to wrench himself out of the minion's hands but the grip's like iron. He hears footsteps approaching and struggles harder.

Moonstar enters the room.

Kai gasps involuntarily, struggling not to get to his knees and proclaim his loyalty to the supervillain. Only the nagging wolf voice in his mind holds him back. Moonstar's powers of charisma and persuasion are legendary when he chooses to use them, and Kai suspects they're the only reason Gemma agreed to let him come on this mission.

"Interesting," Moonstar purrs, approaching Kai and tilting his chin up. "You're not immune. I always thought shifters were immune."

That's when Kai realises that he's standing completely still. He jerks his chin back, headbutting the minion, who lets out a yell. Moonstar's charisma switches off abruptly and Kai thinks he might finally have a chance of escape when Moonstar's hand flashes, the glint of light the only sign of the blade that was there and gone in an instant.

And the blood.

Kai watches as a line of blood wells up from a slash on his arm, bright red and glistening.

Oh.

Fuck.

The room darkens and sways and far too soon he's out cold.

_

When Kai wakes, he's freezing. And it's dark. Not dark like a darkened room, dark as in there's fabric covering his face. He hears rustling, and he tries to move his hands or push himself up off his knees but he can't.

"Ah, the hero awakes." Kai's hood is ripped off and he blinks into the bright light, seeing Moonstar smiling down at him. He realises he's stripped down to his underwear, his hands and lower legs chained to the floor, and he tries to transform into a wolf but as soon as his vision starts to change, a jolt of electricity rocks him back with a cry. Moonstar tsks.

"Trying to avoid my hospitality already? That isn't very polite. And here I was, thinking you heroes had manners."

Kai swallows, feeling leather and plastic around his throat and flinching as– god. That's where the shock came from, wasn't it?

"Fuck you."

"Now, now. I'm trying to tell you something important, this isn't just a friendly chat. You see, that collar of yours is a shock collar, as you may have noticed, and the shock just now? That was the lowest setting. If you try to transform again, I'll set it high enough to kill you. Understood?"

Kai glares at him. Fuck him if he thinks he's getting an answer. But he continues staring, finger inching ever closer to a remote, and eventually Kai spits out, "Yes."

"There. Was that so hard?" He clicks his fingers and two minions step forward, unlocking his limbs from the floor. "Now you know the consequences, we can talk like civilised people. Maybe you'll even answer my questions, though I don't hold out much hope. So, shall we begin? One wrong move and you get shocked. And I haven't given my minions any fun for ages."

One man grins, holding up a… oh, god, is that a hot poker? Kai attempts to brace himself. He's not telling these people anything.

"First question. Where does the Hero League keep their stolen information?"

"I don't know."

One of Moonstar's minions steps forward and presses the poker to Kai's side.

The heat burns, lighting Kai's back up in agony, and he lurches forward, falling to the ground, vision tunnelling. "I'm telling the truth! I don't know! Please, I don't… I don't!"

When he stops screaming and pleading, panting on the floor, Moonstar raises an eyebrow. "I find that hard to believe. So we'll try it again. Where does your organisation keep its stolen information?"

_

Kai's not sure how long it is before Moonstar gives up on getting information that Kai doesn't know out of him and hands him over to his minions to have fun with, but it only gets worse from there. They burn his back with hot pokers and electrocute him, sometimes both at once if they're feeling sadistic enough, and when he's not actively being tortured he's left on his knees with a hood blocking out all light, white noise blasting over the speakers at random. If he even twitches a finger, whoever's on duty will shock him. He hasn't slept, eaten or drank anything since he arrived, and they've threatened him with worse.

It's worst of all when Moonstar comes to watch, taunting him. He can't block it out. He tries to hold out hope that his teammates are coming for him, but with every session that passes it's harder. They've probably abandoned him, it's not like he's very useful. He got himself captured.

On some occasions, the occasions that Kai hates most of all because they make him so disoriented and vulnerable, Moonstar directs his minions to cut Kai, forcing him to faint over and over again, until he can barely think.

And he can't do anything to stop it. They're already getting exactly what they want.

_

Kai wakes for the fiftieth time that session, or so it feels like, his head heavy and his body hurting. Everything hurts these days.

He lifts his head determinedly and glares at Moonstar.

The supervillain only chuckles, a smirk on his face. "It's like putting a budgie to sleep, only much more amusing." He sighs and stands, brushing himself off. "As fun as this is, though, I have something to organise. After all, if you won't give me anything, I'll have to find someone who will. Put him back to sleep in his corner when you're done."

_

The next day, two of Moonstar's minions pull Kai roughly to his feet, chaining his hands high above his head, forcing him to balance on his toes. Then they remove the hood and force a ball gag into his mouth, buckling it overly tight behind his head. He breathes through his nose, trying not to gag.

The minions stand back as the door swings open and Moonstar saunters in. He smiles upon seeing Kai.

"Oh yes, you'll do nicely. Just the perfect combination of injured and trapped. Got to send a photo to your team, after all. They should know about your… predicament."

Kai can't speak but he twists his hand carefully in his cuffs, sticking one finger up. It gets him a punch to the face, but he doesn't really care. Inside he's panicking. He doesn't want his friends to see him like this.

"That wasn't very nice, now, was it?" says Moonstar mildly, pulling out a phone and holding it up. "Smile for the camera now."

Kai glares at the supervillain and hears a camera shutter. Moonstar types something on his phone.

"I wonder how your friends will react to that. What do you think?"

"I think," Kai pants, "that you can go fuck yourself."

Moonstar sighs deeply and Kai's nerves light up. When he comes back to himself, dangling from the restraints, he hears a jaunty ringtone.

"Oh. Excuse me." Moonstar walks out of the room, his men following behind, and when the door slams shut Kai realises he doesn't know how long he's going to be left like this.

Well. That's okay. He can cope. He can.

In. Out. In. Out. He breathes shakily and tries to concentrate on putting his feet back under himself.

He's not sure how long it is before Moonstar returns, undoing the gag. It feels like a long time but it might not be.

"Hello again. How are you feeling?"

"Fuck you."

Moonstar tsks. "Manners, manners. Dear me, what is the world coming to? But that's not why I'm here."

"Why are you here?"

"I just spoke to your pathetic excuse for a team. They're not coming for you. Told me so themselves. You're not useful enough to bother with rescuing."

No. No, that can't be true. They wouldn't leave him here. Would they?

Moonstar roars with laughter, making Kai realise he spoke aloud. "Oh, this is just too good. You're so hopelessly gullible. Of course they're coming. You heroes, you always come. Negotiations are in a few days." Oh. Kai's face heats up with embarrassment and anger. "Now. Obviously you're going to be at the talks, to remind your people what they stand to lose. So the only question remaining is whether you'll behave or if I need to restrain you."

"I won't behave," Kai spits out, "I'm not going to obey you in front of everyone. Fuck you." He won't let his team see him obeying Moonstar.

The supervillain grins. "That's just the answer I was hoping for."

_

Kai shivers as he waits in the centre of the warehouse. The leather and metal restraints holding him in a kneeling position rub against his bare skin, knees pressed to the cold cement. He can barely feel them anymore. His jaw aches from the ball gag and his back's agony from where Moonstar's steel-toed boots press lightly into the burns there. He swallows against the thick band of leather, feeling the prongs dig in as a subtle warning. If he doesn't stay perfectly still, Moonstar won't hesitate to punish him in front of his team.

He never wants them to see him like that.

Moonstar had him restrained like this first thing, claiming that it would 'prepare him for the long meeting'. Kai's sure it's just to make him look worse for his team though.

Not that that's really necessary. After days of torture, he must look like shit anyway.

Kai's not afraid to admit that he's absolutely terrified. What if his team doesn't want him back? What if they decide he's not worth rescuing, not worth the price? He's not really and he knows it. No-one else on the team would've been captured so easily.

What if his team decides to abandon him here?

He takes as deep a breath as he can. They're– they're coming to negotiate, right? So they can't be planning on abandoning him.

But they still could.

Moonstar drags his legs off Kai's back, scraping the injuries as he does so, and Kai sees his boots appear in front of him before Moonstar yanks his head up by the hair. Kai's eyes water as he glares up at the supervillain. Moonstar only smiles.

"Ah, I see you're doing well. No point in pretending to be defiant, you know, I can see the terror in your eyes. The tears you're trying so hard to hide. Don't worry. If your team doesn't buy you, I'm sure we can find some… other use for you."

There's a crackle of static from Moonstar's communicator.

"The heroes are here, boss."

Moonstar drops Kai and takes a seat back in his plush leather chair, feet landing hard on Kai's back. "Well, what are you waiting for? Send them in."

Kai breathes through his nose, trying to calm himself. It's okay. He can do this.

His team walks in the door, escorted by two minions. They're unrestrained, but Kai isn't fooled. They can't attack with him here.

Unless that's their plan. Use this meeting as a trap to destroy Moonstar.

Gemma would never order the use of deadly force, but the Hero League higher-ups might.

Maybe they're going to destroy Moonstar and Kai with him. Because Kai isn't important to them, not really. He's not as useful as the others.

Gemma's eyes latch onto Kai and she takes a step forward, halting when Lian places a hand on her arm.

"Good choice, Solar Flare. See that collar around Wolfman's neck? I've been using it to control him, but if you make a single move to attack me I'll crank the voltage right up and let it run until your friend's dead. Are we clear?"

"Perfectly," grinds out Gemma. Lian and Morfydd both nod, Lian avoiding looking at Kai.

"Now, before we start, are you sure you want to negotiate? I'm quite happy to keep Wolfman here. He'd make for a nice little pet hero." Moonstar ruffles Kai's hair, and he trembles, fighting back a flinch.

"You bastard!" yells Morfydd, tears in their eyes, and Kai blinks. Morfydd very rarely yells, it hurts their ultra-sensitive hearing, even with their ear defenders. "Cer i grafu ti coc oen!"

"Now now. Don't get like that. You don't want Wolfman to get hurt."

"What the hell do you want, Moonstar?" asks Gemma angrily. "What do you want in exchange for Wolfman back?"

Moonstar smirks. "Well, that's the question isn't it. Or rather, what are you willing to give me for him?"

Kai lowers his eyes. Look properly pathetic for me, Wolfman, and I might sell you back for a reasonable price. He has to look truly pathetic if he wants a chance at going home, even if it eats at his pride to do so.

It's not a hard look to achieve. He looks at Gemma, stripping away the layer of pretence that's his only protection. She looks terrified for him, although she's hiding it well, and her hand twitches. "Name your price first."

"The drive you stole from me last week, for starters. And shall we say… £100,000? Nice round figure."

"£80,000," retorts Gemma.

"£100,000 or I keep your little hero as a pet."

"Fine. Deal. Now give us Wolfman."

"My drive and money first."

Morfydd digs into their pocket and throws the small hard drive at Moonstar's head. He plucks it out of the air before it reaches him.

"Now, now. No need for violence. And the money?"

"Silverclaw needs to transfer it across. Give her a few minutes and your details."

Gemma tosses a burner phone across the floor and Kai stares. Aisling? Their medic? She's involved in this too?

"And… done. Message sent. Ooh, got a thumbs up. That's all you need this phone for, right?" And without waiting for an answer he crushes it under his boot.

"Can we have Wolfman back now? We've met your demands."

"I suppose you have. Shame, I was looking forward to keeping him. Solar Flare, middle of the room, no further."

Gemma limps forward to the midpoint between her and Moonstar, rocking back and forth on her heels, clenching her fists compulsively, staring at Kai as if she can will him closer.

Moonstar wrenches Kai's head up by the hair and murmurs in his ear, "Crawl over to your leader. Go on, show her how pathetic you really are." As he unlocks Kai's restraints from the floor he lets the shock collar remote peek out of his pocket, and Kai swallows.

He starts to crawl across the rough, cold floor, scraping his knees as he goes. There's cries of indignation but he keeps his head down, not wanting to see their faces, not wanting them to see his humiliated tears.

He doesn't notice how far he's gotten until Gemma's hands are on him, scooping him up. She's so warm, it feels like he hasn't been warm in forever.

"I've got you, Kai. I've got you. Once the money's finished transferring we'll get you out of here. Stay with me, yeah? You'll be out of here soon."

Kai lets out a muffled whine and presses against her, trying not to see anything else. She runs her hand through his hair.

Several minutes pass, he thinks, before Gemma speaks again, louder this time.

"You have it? Can we leave?"

"Sure. Go. I have what I want, after all. Take Kai Bergström with you."

Gemma stiffens against Kai momentarily and Kai looks up, seeing Moonstar's malevolent grin. He can't muster up much more fear. The four of them follow a minions outside to a League car. Morfydd and Lian climb in the front, and Gemma's starting to help Kai in the back when the man stops her.

"A parting gift from Moonstar." And he slashes across the back of Kai's hand.

Almost immediately, the world goes dark.

_

When Kai wakes he doesn't open his eyes immediately. He doesn't want the dream of being rescued to end. The gentle hands in his hair will disappear if he opens his eyes.

"–his identity?" asks a soft voice, tight with anger. Morfydd.

"We'll figure out how to deal with that once we're back at HQ. Lian, drive us around the back, and Morfydd, pass me that blanket. I don't want people seeing Kai like this."

Kai groans as they turn a corner, and the car quiets.

"Kai? You're awake? Can you open your eyes?"

He doesn't want to, but for Gemma he will, and he peels his eyes open.

Gemma's looking down at him holding a big pink blanket, eyes soft and tight with worry, and he's still in the car. Either the dream hasn't ended, he's having a dream within a dream, or…

He works his jaw. No gag. No shock collar either.

"Not a dream?" he rasps hopefully.

"No. No, not a dream. We can't get the rest of the restraints off in a moving car I'm afraid, you'll have to wait for medbay. How are you feeling?"

"Hurts."

"Okay. We're almost there. Let me wrap you in this blanket."

"Please," whispers Kai. Please, wrap him in something soft and warm, he needs that.

Gemma's as good as her word, wrapping him up snugly. The car pulls to a halt and he's lifted out, unable to see much over the end of the blanket. He closes his eyes, not caring much anymore.

"You made a Kai burrito," comments Lian.

"Yep. Come on."

The ride is bumpy, and Kai only opens his eyes when he's set down on something. The murmur of voices didn't register before but it should have, Aisling's right there above him along with a man he doesn't recognise. She says something he can't properly make out.

"Hmm?"

"Hey Kai. Good to see you again. This is Aaron, he/they, my newest trainee. Is it okay if he helps?"

Kai nods. This Aaron's a professional medic anyway, maybe it won't be too bad.

"Great. I'm going to take off the blanket now, and… oh, god. Aaron, pass me the scissors, I'm not taking the time to bother with the fastenings."

"How bad is he?" asks Lian impatiently.

"We won't know until we've examined him. Stay, talk to him. Keep his mind off things. Kai, do you have any broken bones?" Kai shakes his head. "Okay. Can you take off your underwear? I'll cover you with a blanket afterwards, and we'll get you clean clothes." Kai obeys and pulls the blanket up quickly, covering himself.

"I'm sorry," says Lian, looking him directly in the face for the first time today.

"F'r what?"

"Leaving you behind. I shouldn't have run when Moonstar caught you."

Kai sips at the cup of water Aaron's holding out for him. He has to fight not to gulp it down, the cool liquid heaven on his parched throat. "No. You should. I'm glad you're safe. That why you couldn't look at me?"

"No. I didn't look because I didn't think you'd want me to."

"Oh. Thanks."

Aisling's communicator beeps and she curses, looking down at it. "The higher-ups want to see us immediately. Morfydd, Lian and me."

"It has to be about the unauthorised negotiations," says Morfydd. "If they say we should've just left Kai there…"

"Nah, they'll want to know if Gemma coerced us, as team leader," argues Lian. "As if we can't make our own decisions."

"You know that's not what it's about," says Gemma mildly, as if she hasn't had shouting matches with their managers about autonomy more than anyone else here. "Go. I'll stay with Kai."

"Aaron, can you take over from me?"

"If you think I'm capable."

"Right. We'll be back as soon as we can, Kai."

Kai nods and watches them leave, feeling guilty. In addition to everything else, he's gotten them in trouble.

"Okay Kai, your front doesn't look too bad. Though, when was the last time you drank anything?"

"Aside from that cup of water… before Moonstar."

"Right. Since you're that dehydrated I'd like to put a drip in. Can you turn over so I can check your back first?" Kai does so, heaving a sigh as he takes his weight off the burns, and Gemma sucks in a breath. "Ouch. Let's clean your back and then I can heal some of it. You should take some painkillers."

Kai shakes his head, stomach turning. I could get the guards to give you something that'll make you scream properly. "I don't want any. They make me fuzzy, I'm already fuzzy, don't want to be more fuzzy."

"Easy. You don't have to have them, it's your choice, yeah? I'd advise them, but it's up to you."

"No, I– I can't."

"Okay. Take Gemma's hand and bite down on this. At least nothing looks infected."

Kai does as they say, gripping his mentor's hand tightly and biting down on the silicon… thing.

It hurts. Oh, god, it hurts as Aaron cleans his burns, his vision swims and he wants to be sick.

The waves of pain fade eventually to a dull ache, and his jaw is stiff around the silicon. He lets it go, just about.

"Are you okay?" asks Aaron. Kai nods. "Right. I'm going to heal as much as I can, although since you're so starved there won't be much energy to use, so most of your treatment will be done manually. That okay?" He nods again. Huh. Aaron has healing powers. Kai feels warm hands on his back. "Hold still."

A tingly feeling spreads across his injuries. It's not bad, exactly, just weird. He's never been healed before. It feels a bit like pins and needles. Hurts like it too, after a while.

Slowly that fades, though, and although the pain's still there it's not quite so bad anymore.

"That's it for the painful parts. Your burns don't need debriding now, that's good, I'll just bandage them and insert your IV. Later, when your body's settled from the healing, you can have some food. How's that sound?"

"Good. Thank you."

"Not a problem. I'm glad we got you back." He starts preparing an IV and there's silence for a few minutes.

"Where did you get the money?" Kai asks suddenly. £100,000… that's a lot. It certainly wasn't authorised from League funds.

"Your team's savings," replies Aaron. "I gave some too when they ran out."

Kai stares at his mentor for a moment, unable to comprehend it. "But… Gemma… you and Aisling were saving for your retirement. And you don't even know me, Aaron. I'm not worth all that."

"Neither of us are retiring yet. Besides, you are worth every penny and more, Kai. You're a valuable member of the team, but more importantly, you're our friend. You're family. My retirement is certainly not worth more than your life, don't ever think that."

Kai tries to swallow past the sudden lump in his throat, eyes filling with tears. "You– I–"

Gemma moves to sit on the edge of the bed, pulling Kai's head into her lap. She runs her hand through his hair, scratching his itching scalp.

And Kai can't hold it in anymore. He crumbles, sobbing into Gemma's lap. Loud, messy, gulping sobs that he can't quite stop.

"I was so scared," he says through tears, when he can speak, "so scared. I was terrified that you'd leave me there, that I wasn't worth rescuing. And Moonstar, he– he terrified me. He tortured me and he made me beg and I couldn't stop it. I didn't mean to, it just hurt so much. I'm sorry I got captured. I'm a– a rubbish hero."

"Hey," scolds Gemma, gently but firmly, "you're not rubbish. Heroes aren't infallible. Most of us have been captured at least once. And I'm sorry for making you think you weren't worth everything to us. The only reason we didn't come for you sooner was because my leg had to heal first, but I never should've made you think you'd been abandoned."

"It's not your fault," Kai sniffles. "I've felt like that my whole life, I know it's irrational. I've never been abandoned."

"I'm your mentor. Maybe your fear wasn't caused by me, but I should've reassured you. I should've known how scared you were and helped you. I'm sorry."

"It's not like I told you anything."

Gemma raises an eyebrow. "Just like you didn't tell me you still pass out at the sight of your own blood? You told me the exact opposite, actually."

Kai, who'd just been starting to feel a little better, wilts, hiding from Gemma's stern look. "I just– I wanted to go on an actual mission," he mumbles. "and I know you only took me because I'm not really affected by Moonstar's powers but you'd have left me behind if you thought I'd be so use– detrimental."

"No, Kai. I'd have made sure you had one of the new cut-proof full-body suits. And I still am going to get you one made. They'll ground us at least for the unauthorised ransom negotiations, we have plenty of time."

"Thank you."

"And we didn't just bring you for your powers. I wish you'd think better of yourself. You're brave, clever, resourceful. Besides, everyone has to have their first mission at some point." Kai snuggles up against Gemma. "Hey, are you okay? Well, you're not, obviously, but you're not usually this physically affectionate."

"I'm still scared," whispers Kai. He doesn't want to admit it but they agreed a long time ago that they'd only tell the truth in the medbay. "I keep thinking I'm still captured. If I close my eyes and I'm not touching anyone, it's like I'm still there. I mean, I know I'm not, but I'm still so cold and my body can't believe it. How do I do it?"

"You wait. Get some sleep, so you can think properly. Don't be too hard on yourself, you were tortured for a week, it's bound to stick for a while. And I'll stay. Prove to you that I'd never abandon you. I really am very sorry I ever let you think we would."

"It won't help to drown yourself in regret," murmurs Kai, finding Gemma's warm, calloused hand. He only spent a week there? She squeezes his hand tightly.

"Stealing my own words now, huh? Go on, go to sleep. I'll be here when you wake."

"I can't. I've seen you have nightmares, I don't want to remember what happened. I never wanted you to see me like that and I– what if I experience it again?"

"Then I'll wake you. You need rest. You could let Aaron give you a sedative?"

Kai shakes his head. "I won't be able to wake myself then." And he really doesn't want anything injected into him. It's like putting a budgie to sleep, only much more amusing. A needle might draw blood, and that would only make him weaker.

"Okay. Okay. Stay awake as long as you need to. Whoever comes over here next can fetch you some extra blankets, and let me give you a hug in the meantime?"

Kai nods and lets himself fall into Gemma's arms. She's warm, so warm compared to him, and he knows he'll fall asleep eventually but he really doesn't want to.

At least he's home, though. That's the important thing. He's home. He just needs to remember that and he'll– he'll be okay.

[howgalling]

sketching out attack moves for my ultrakill secret boss oc

[zazikels]

Alexander married Queen Anora in a lavish ceremony six months after her coronation, becoming the prince-consort of Ferelden. Many said that if the two did not end up vying for control of the throne, they would usher in a new golden age not seen since King Calenhad first united the barbarian tribes.