#aight lets set this fucker up

[hwajin]

☆°. — silly boyfie things | skz

genre: fluff

pairing: skz x gn!reader

note: i haven't posted headcanons in ages and this was SO much fun to fabricate omg hope you like it 🫶🫶

— CHAN

he would FIGHT with you over the check after you went out for dinner. like literally FIGHT and not budge when you propose to pay yourself, because you feel bad that he always, always pays for the both of you. you think you smarted him out when you invited him for dinner calling for you to pay but he has his wallet ready the moment you finish your food, telling the waiter the bill is shared and having his money out faster than you can look — it nearly enrages you every time, but he tells you he genuinely enjoys paying, doesn't mind it and wants to do it, so you have no chance other than letting it go (even if reluctantly).

— LINO

he's so annoying he thinks it's PEAK commedy to say "no" to every single favour you ask him only to do it seconds later. OR saying no and waiting, actually not doing said favour and waiting for you to get annoyed until he'd nudge and end up doing it after all. giggles as if he's the funniest mf like he enjoys seeing you being annoyed so much. acts like this in front of friends and in public in general as well, ALSO cringes sm when you show him affection whenever on a get together though the moment the two of you are alone he literally won't be able to keep his hands off you. like he pretends to be so disgusted when you even as much as touch him in public, and the moment you're alone behind closed doors he's slouching onto you like a koala.

— CHANGBIN

omg you can't tell me that he didn't invent the "no you hang up first" 😭 like you'd be coming to the end of a conversation (often while he's on tour or smth tho he literally needs to hear your voice every single day so he calls you like whenever he has a minute even of free time) and at some point he's like "aight hang up 🥰" and you play along and hit him with the "no you do 😆😝" and the quarelling goes back and forth (jokingly on your side, in ALLLL seriousness on his) and at some point you say goodbye for real and hang up AND YOU CAN BET THIS FUCKER CALLS BACK like all pouty and actually slightly upset that you had the audacity to hang up??? and you're like someone has to at some point we can't have an endless phone convo??? and he's like why not do YOU NOT LOVE ME???? yeah you get it.

— HYUNJIN

bro this man NEEDS him to be your lockscreen on your phone. like it's an actual need of his or else he's gonna cease to exist he thinks. like you're obviously his wallpaper (both on his lock AND homescreen) so when he catches a glimpse of your phone and you dare to have just a random pinterest pic as your lockscreen, one you've chosen mindlessly altogether he RIOTSSSS. pouts as if his life is depending on it, clutches his heart as if it's gonna stop any minute, gasps and side-eyes you as if you straight up cheated on him. takes a selfie RIGHT that moment (it takes him a while because he both can't decide whether he wants it to be cute or sexy, and because he wants to look good either way) and sets it as your lockscreen instantly. checks like daily to see if you've changed it (if you did to tease him he LITERALLY is moments from breaking up with you).

— JISUNG

he sends you pics of ugly looking animals with a 'you' attached to the message. like even if it has no resemblence with you altogether. like it'll be a fish, a whale, a bird, a funny looking dog and their all attached with 'you'. and like he finds it so funny even if you never react to it, in fact finds it SO hilarious that at some point he will send you pics of literally ANYTHING he sees ever — like furniture, tools, random fucking street lamps, you name it — with a 'you' attached to it and CACKLES as if he invented comedy himself. the bright side to it, he takes this to the romantic level and shoots pretty pics of flowers and sends them with the same 'you' attached to it, or pics of the sky, or of a particularly bright star. so maybe it's not that annoying after all.

— FELIX

he causes his friends to tease you because he literally can't shut up about you. like every single thing you do he even slightly adores (which is, every single thing period, tbh) is being reported to his friends because he's just so in love with you he has to get the words out or he'll combust :((. like you'd maybe get him a little gift, smth small about stuff he's interested in lately, or these "i saw this and thought of you" gifts and he presents said gift to his friends as if it's an artifact of love itself, and the next time you're over they're going at you, teasing the shit out of you because tbh, they've teased felix so much already for talking their ears off that they need another victim. you basically never stop blushing when around them, hearing constantly just how much your bf talks about you when you're not around (and you'd lie saying you don't like it).

— SEUNGMIN

bro just straight up leaves you on read except when your text contains something of advantage to him 😭😭. like you haven't seen him in a while and want to catch up a bit? he reads the message and responds like 5 hours later ("we've seen each other yesterday, you can't possibly miss me enough to talk again"). or when you send him random tiktoks or shitposts — opens and reads them and then doesn't ever bother to even leave a like 😭. though the moment you hit him with a text like "running to the supermarket, you want anything?" he's responding the same second and you grow salty every time, wondering why you put up texting him in the first place.

— JEONGIN

pretends to be jealous like a LOT. like the first time he'd be actually jealous, going fresh into the relationship with insecurities still gnawing at you and him and when he confesses you reassure him, making sure he understands there will never be an occassion on which he needs to be remotefully jealous, even. and after that he simply pretends to be, for shits and giggles and to piss you off. like you talk to the barista for your order? how could you even look their direction omg. you send a quick text to a friend while out with him? how dare he's not the single most important thing in your life rn. you tell him about a dream that didn't involve him? breaking up with you this very instant. can't stop himself from giggling at his one if a kind humour while watching you grow annoyed every time anew.

@happycandynoelle @es-kay-zee @jeyelleohe @angelwonie @lix-ables @yvniek4ng @ppiri-bahng @bintificreads @svintsandghosts @llunapastell @sensitiveandhungry @minniesvenus @junebug032 @noellllslut

[sillygoofyqueer]

Either before or after would be delightful, though I was thinking it was after Bing-ge became emperor.

I was imagining the situation with Shen Yuan being a transmigrator forced to steal stuff from Bing-ge because that was his character’s original role in the plot. He wants to be inconspicuous about it so as not to get murdered (like canon… also murder of crows, lol) but shiny qi rich things are just too tempting!!! Stupid crow brain won’t let him steal things that are less obvious. ;_;

And yay! You know about the crow tendency to make friends with people then be “helpful” with gifts or savage in their defense. That’s why I like crow-Shen Yuan so much. I can totally see him getting help from his full-crow demon family members (or regular crows if he can control them like ZZL can snakes) to harass assholes by dropping rocks, pooping on them and such while in their full crow forms. 😂

He absolutely feels bad about stealing stuff from people he likes (especially Bing-ge) so of course he always offers payments in exchange. Rare plants, animal parts, non-shiny artifacts, etc. all suspiciously selected to be super useful in upcoming plot events, to Bing-ge’s bafflement. Probably doesn’t help the obsession. How TF does this thief know what he’s going to need soon???

AAAGGGHHHH, THIS IS SO FUN!! I love this idea that Shen Yuan either has like, demon family members that he can relax with (oh em gosh, seeing his original family in these demons?) or just hangs out with like, a murder of crows and is like "aight, get these fuckers" and they just swarm whoever irritated him that day. He definitely has a nest in a mountain somewhere, just filled with these shiny things that he steals from people, and oh my god can he just be like a safe haven for other crows (demon or otherwise) and have little perches that he makes for them and helps the ones that are too injured to hunt for themselves. He's like a master of crows and (despite being just a thorn in the side of the demon emperor) he is known to be terrifying lest these crows get hurt (I'm picturing half human Shen Yuan standing in the shadows of a forest with wings outstretched and just staring down at the culprit) BACK TO BING-GE, I'd find it really funny if Shen Yuan first steals shiny and qi rich things that are small and he can just take in full crow form because they aren't really heavy, leaving Bing-ge like "no fucking way a literal crow has been stealing from me. This feels humiliating what the hell". Later on, he sets a trap for Shen Yuan to steal this big trinket (a statue or something that radiates qi) because he knows it would be too heavy for the crow to take and he can grab it! He waits, then watches as Shen Yuan observes the statue a little bit, before shifting into his half-crow form and just scooping it up into his arms, scowling at the weight before flying out again. Bing-ge is sat there for a while like "what the fuck just happened" and then he watches as Shen Yuan returns a few minutes later with a herb that is supposed to be extremely useful for a poison or something, drops it where the statue was, and darts away again. After that, it's like the only thing on Bing-ge's mind is "how can I get this pretty demon to come back?" and he doesn't even think about his harem (if he has one in this), leaving them all around his palace absolutely confused and questioning what has happened to their emperor. {part two! Part one, part three, part four, part five, part six, part seven!!}

[summaryi]

A Court of Wings and Ruin - Sarah J. Maas (Book 3)

uwauwauwauawuawuawuawuawua

SPOILERS BELOW

in the moment, i very much was team FUCK IT UP, FEYRE, LET’S FUCKIN GGOOOOOOOOOOOOO

and now, the me who has finished the acotar series is like

was that shit like

maybe a lot

and like

short sighted as well

LIKE I UNDERSTAND

A LOT HAPPENED

but also like

it DID kinda wreck the Spring Court at a very precarious time for .... all of Prythian......

Like, yes. Tamlin hurt her. In an unforgivable way. His shit and inability to deal with it. He betrayed her AND Prythian? The continent? Is Hybern... Part of Prythian? Anyways. He betrayed the collective them to Hybern. His actions had unintended collateral consequences.

But like, damn.

Feyre really said power vacuum whomstdve????????? go off queen yaaaas

I HATE Ianthe. So glad Feyre has her moment on Summer Solstice.

i know it would be ~too convenient~ but i would have loved to see our Inner Court working with Lucien as heir apparent to the Autumn Court

like, yeah, there’s a lot of history and context that’s already been set around Lucien

but like

how nice would it have been

you know???????????

i truly loved the arc about the Ouroboros mirror. it warms me. very strong like. idk. it’s very satisfying to think about. and the bone carver. I CRIED FOR HIM????????? THIS MONSTER, ONE OF THE MOST FEARSOME BEINGS, A MOTHERFUCKER OF ALL FUCKERS DOING FUCKERY, I CRIED FOR HIM

i love that Ianthe meets the Weaver. love it.

FUCKING HURTS ME WHEN THE SURIEL DIES. HOW DARE YOU, SARAH. HOW COULD YOU. HE MIGHT BE SPOOKY AND ABLE TO KILL EFFORTLESSLY BUT HE’S JUST A LIL GUY. JUST A TINY LIL GUY. FUCK. HOW COULD YOU. MY HEART. HE’S SO TINY AND HE’S DEAD???????

my UNCONTROLLABLE GLEE WHEN MOR TELLS FEYRE SHE’S HOMOSEXUAL AND PANROMANTIC??????? GO OFF QUEEN

WE LOVE TALKING ABOUT THE SPECTRUM OF IDENTITY AND ATTRACTION

AND i love that we don’t just get a 

BOOM here’s Lucien and Elain as mates uwu

we get to see it unfold - just because there IS a mating bond doesn’t mean that in this very progressive circle of Fae, wow it’s magic and sparkles

Elain and Azriel really really really really warms my heart AND I NEED TO SEE MORE

I NEED TO SEE MOOOOOOOOORE

The war? I really don’t know why I expected it to last for more of the book, but also kinda glad it didn’t. After all, this isn’t a war series. It’s a Faerie porn romance series (and there just so happens to be a war plot)

I’m not personally super fond of this Rhys-dies-and-immediately-comes-back-to-life business. It does give us a small moment of Tamlin redemption.

It just. idk. it hit different, and it hit bad.

turning FULLY DEAD Feyre into High Fae and thus saving her life and giving her immortality was a BIG FUCKING DEAL. it took ALL the High Lords, AND she’d just saved them from a lifetime of having 0 powers, and Amarantha. that whole thing. so like, if ANYONE had done some shit to save their WORLD, sure, human Feyre

aight, cool, so this is a BIG FUCKING DEAL. the payoff with Feyre MAKES SENSE. I FELT THE EMOTIONAL WEIGHT.

reviving Fae - questionable. never been tried. also, a BIG FUCKING DEAL. I get that Rhys also saved them by repairing the Cauldron, but like. idk. the threat of the UNIVERSE unraveling didn’t seem like that big a deal. is it just me? is it just me who didn’t sit with that long enough?

because also, like. the threat of the universe unraveling is yes, BIG, but what’s the impact of that vs the impact of Feyre-didnt-break-our-curse?

universe unravels - okay, everyone stops existing. it sucks, but also like doesn’t such because now nobody exists

Feyre didn’t break the curse - everyone still exists and their lives suck and they exist and life SUCKS

but also like. whatever. Rhys is alive. AND AMREN IS BACK. Very glad Maas does NOT put us through the emotional trauma of losing all our favorite characters

[phantomphangphucker]

Phic Phight: [REDACTED] “Oh Goddamnit. DANNY!”

Prompt Creator: @mr-lancers-english-class

Even Danny’s school projects cause ghostly issues and Lancer really should have seen this coming.

Alright fine, Lancer knew this was a bad idea. He knew it. And yet... here they all are, with each of his students doing their self-chosen presentations. And as he should have expected, Every. Single. One. has been on Phantom. Sure at least there’s been some variety. Star’s piece on his fashion and how that reflects on his personality and the era he died was actually fairly interesting (if it wasn’t for the fact that Phantom spiced up his jumpsuit with t-shirts and whatnot sometimes then this would have been a very boring one). Kwan also surprised him some, apparently he’s spent the past year or so sneaking photos of Phantom eating and did a piece on Phantom’s rather peculiar food tastes (who dips their pickles in milkshakes???) as well as effectively providing proof for the existence of ectoplasmic food (there’s no way any earth apples are neon green on the inside). Dash’s wasn’t even correctly calculated, trying to figure out how far Phantom could throw footballs based on his known strength and if he could kill someone by tackling them (disturbingly the answer -regardless of Dash’s bad math- was decidedly yes. Daniel seemed particularly disturbed). And Paulina’s was quite literally a badly written self-insert ship fan fic; the added drawings of what their child would look like only made it worse (Daniel left, not that Lancer could blame him. Lancer’s also glad for the ghost fight interrupting the presentation). Emilie’s was... disturbingly about ghost hunger and purposed the thesis that Phantom, for the good of the town, should eat the aggressor ghosts (he actually had to cut her off for getting too graphic).

But the single most interesting thing was that a ghost apparently caught wind of this and literally Every. Single. Presentation so far had words that were permanently replaced with [REDACTED], which, needless to say, caused some chaos when Samantha gave the very first presentation.

-

Lancer clicked his pen, crossing his legs and resting the evaluation sheet on his thigh, “alright, Samantha. Feel free to start whenever you please, though soon would be preferred”, by ‘preferred’ he had meant required, but no need to be mean. He chooses to ignore the goth teen's eyeroll.

Predictably the projected screen doesn’t work when she opens her file so Lancer has to spend ten minutes fiddling with the outdated tech that they wouldn’t give the school funding to replace. Eventually, he does get it up and running showing Ms. Manson’s title screen reading ‘Phantom And Hate Crimes Against Blood Blossoms’. Lancer’s positive ‘blood blossoms’ are a type of flower, figures she would do something nature-focused. She’d make for a great herbalist or botanist someday. He does catch Daniel and Tucker giving her ‘death glares’, as the kids call it, though; Samatha doesn’t look any less smug. The second page has what he thinks was supposed to be a detailed drawing of a flower but it’s severely pixilated, almost as if it been blurred; Samantha looks visibly upset so he’s going to assume something when wrong with the file or pasting format. He’s not marking on artistic capabilities though, so effort is effort there.

She quickly clicks to the next page, where the actual writing of the assignment is and looks decidedly pissed; Lancer even quirks an eyebrow since at least two-thirds of the words are a very bold noticeable [REDACTED]. Lancer watches her yank out her physical copy while glaring with murderous intent at Daniel -Lancer will have to dock him marks if he messed with another student's project- before looking at the physical copy in bafflement for a few seconds. Half the class shrieking when she drops the papers and basically launches herself over the desks at Daniel, “OH YOU LITTLE FUCKER!!!! HOW THE FUCK!”.

Lancer’s sighs and stands, “language, Ms. Manson”, moving to pick up the papers and quirking an eyebrow over them looking the same. Sighing again and eyeing Daniel, who’s being choked -or throttled perhaps?- by Samantha yet is grinning innocently. “Daniel, messing with other students' work is against student policy”, sighing yet again, “and I’ll let Star go while Samantha fixes her document”, summoning up the blonde while glaring at Daniel. Some days that boy was more trouble than he was worth but he was also insanely bright and had a heart of gold. Lancer knows he’ll do good things someday, and that’s why he still tries with him.

Half the class is snickering or laughing now and Star is very clearly trying not to laugh as she sets up.

However, as soon as it opens up the class is met with a very familiar sight. [REDACTED] litters every single page; he checked. And Star’s physical copy was in the same state.

Kwan blinks, “okay seriously, what is going on”, before scrambling to grab out his own physical copy; the rest of the class going wide-eyed and following suit. Lancer just puts his head in his hands and sighs very audibly while shaking his head. Why could nothing go right? Sighing again as the class erupts into noise.

“Mines all weird too!”.

“Same here!”.

“Okay there is no way Fenturd messed up everyone’s work”.

“And I actually tried on mine! It was about the merits of Phantom getting armour!”.

“Oh damn do we just get auto hundreds now? Please please please say yes”.

“Oh damn, Phantom would actually look awesome in armour”.

“I know right”.

“Can we just skip class entirely now?”.

“Oh my Zone a ghost messed with or work”.

“Holy Shit”.

“Wait! Wait! Wait! You don’t think Phantom did do you?”.

“Why the heck would he do that? How would he even know??????”.

“Oh I hope Phantom was inside my computer. That would be so hot”.

“Oh I don’t know, maybe someone told him or he overheard shit. He’s a ghost, he can be invisible. Heck, he could be here, right now, invisible”.

“Invisible and laughing at us”.

“No! No! Hold up! What if he doesn’t want us writing about him or maybe someone wrote some sus shit and he just nerfed us all for good measure”.

“That would mean Phantom totally read my stuff, aw Hell yeah man. That was some boss shit”,

Lancer sighs and stands up, “alright that’s enough”, sighing again because why did this have to happen to him, “and I apologies for blaming you earlier, Daniel”.

Samantha snaps, “oh no, I still blame him”, and continues glaring at the teen. Lancer suspects Samantha would continue blaming the boy even if it was firmly proven he wasn’t at fault.

Addressing the class again, “here’s what we’re going to do, you’re going to read off what of your projects you actually can and allude to the rest. Please reframe from repeating what you know was there beforehand as I’d rather not have whatever ghost responsible -Phantom or otherwise- come here pissed off”, glaring at few students who look slightly encouraged rather than discouraged by that prospect, “anyone who does will receive automatic zeroes”, ah and the encouraged looks have deflated. Good. Gesturing at Star, “you’re already up here, so do continue”. Better to not bring the clearly infuriated Samantha back to the front until she’s had some time to calm down.

Star nods and clears her throat, thankfully everyone quiets down. “O-okay, well, um”, gesturing at the screen, “I did my piece on Phantom’s sense of fashion and the cover image was one with him dressed in one of the Spook Sense stores meme shirts....”.

-

Lancer shakes away the memory, he honestly slightly regrets giving this project. But regardless right now is Daniel’s turn and Lancer is honestly slightly fearful of what his file is going to look like. Thankfully all their files were saved to his computer before the [REDACTED] debacle, so no one could go back in and edit theirs to add [REDACTED]’s for an easy grade. Lancer’s still not exactly sure how he’s supposed to mark assignments that were anywhere from one-fifth to one-third [REDACTED]. That word will be burned into his head after this grading period.

Lancer moves to find the boys file, but stares when clicking it crashes the computer. Not once. Not twice. But thrice. The fourth time rebooting the computer he inspects the file and is a bit dumbfounded, “Daniel, your entire file’s corrupted. The file type has even been changed to redacted, which I’m fairly sure, isn’t actually any possible file designation”. Everyone’s silent for a bit before bursting out into laughter.

“Just what the Zone did you write, Danny!”.

“Oh we so have to know what this is now”.

“Danny has the forbidden knowledge! We haft found him! The keeper of things forbidden and Ghostly! Haza!”.

“Ha! It was probably so lame that Phantom wanted to save him the embarrassment”.

Lancer sighs, but Daniel gestures Tucker up, “hey Tuck, feel like trying to fix the file”. Tucker chuckles and walks up, though apparently glaring at the boy. Based on Daniel’s smirk he finds this quite amusing.

Tucker does manage to make the file viewable at least. Lancer nods and leans back in his seat, “thank you, Mr. Foley”, while the file loads on screen.

Tucker sits back down with a head shake while Daniel stands at the front and gestures to the screen, “aight, as you can see from my not redacted title-”, that earns a couple laughs, “I did mine on Phantom’s portfolio of crime. Every single time our dear Phantom broke ghost law. Including such wonderful things as, that time he caused not one, not two, not even three, but five, prison breaks in one day. Or that time he invalidated a Observant spectator duel by bringing an inflatable sword”. Samantha slams a hand on her desk, “IT IS YOUR FAULT YOU DICK!”.

Lancer has some serious questions as Daniel clicks for the next page, the entire class going dead silent as a screen comprising of almost nothing but the word [REDACTED] shows. Lancer sighs very audibly. Eventually the class starts up again.

“Fenton... actually has forbidden knowledge”.

“If it wasn’t for the teacher computer saved thing I’d think he was fucking with us”.

“I mean... he is a Fenton, right?”.

“Okay the fact that this entire presentation is on ghost crimes is concerning alone. But they’re forbidden ghost crimes at that”.

“Shit I wanted the tea. Damnit”.

“Better question, how does Danny know?”.

Daniel clicking the button to go forward is very audible. And, Chicken Soup For The Soul, every single page is [REDACTED] to the point of being completely and utterly unintelligible. There are occasional lines pointing out how Phantom apparently ate confetti at a ghosts third wedding (which is apparently illegal for some reason) or that time he beat someone up with a violin that had a pie inside it (Lancer can see this one, Lancer himself has smacked a ghost with stranger).  Literally the only photo that isn’t blurred beyond recognition is one of Phantom in a prison uniform (Paulina was very vocal about liking men in uniform here). Lancer is absolutely positive the end of his conclusion ‘[REDACTED] are a bunch of [REDACTED]’ is an insult.

Samantha chucks a boot at his smirking face, “YOU IDIOT. Of course they were going to block you from talking about them. Ancients, I can’t believe you”. Tucker’s busy laughing into his hand.

“Oh my Zone, they know too”.

“They’re really earning that weirdo trio title, huh”.

Daniel snickers as he sits back down, “they broke into my room and wrecked that epic puzzle I was working on. They shoulda seen this shit coming. Literally”. Tucker snorts, “they probably did but couldn’t do anything else about it. They can’t stop you and your endless bullshit”.

“Damn fucking straight”.

Lancer isn’t going to claim to know what exactly they’re talking about but apparently Daniel effectively orchestrated this entire fiasco just to annoy some ghost. Lancer is honestly more impressed than disturbed. A for effort but an A- for making everyone's work nigh unusable.

End.

Prompt: For the last project of their senior year in high school, Mr. Lancer is letting his class do presentations on literally whatever topic they want. He is very, /very/ sure that this is going to go poorly, but that's a problem for later...

[raventreehouse]

OK BUT. I REQUESTED THIS ON ANOTHER BLOG BUT KEL(AND MAYBE IRL AUBREY) WITH AN ARSONIST S/O. this is a half joke but idc. aight, thank you! good luck with the writing, and life!

Ah yes arson, the art of life FUCKING CHAOS. Also I tried to make these as long as possible but I can only do so much, so hope you enjoy this!

Kel

Honestly a bit worried

Like he honestly thinks fire is pretty

But to set something that isn’t yours on fire?

That’s a bit much

He tries to support you by setting up bonfires and stuff

You know the more legal stuff that can help your urges to set fire to fucking everything

Listen he’s just worried okay? 

Also off topic but hear me out, barbeques with Kel’s family?

That shit looks fun

When you get invited you get to light the barbeque

Nobody asks why and when they do Kel just says you have a fascination with fire

Because big bro hero would have a fucking heart attack together with mother dearest

He still loves you

Aubrey 

Let’s be honest

Aubrey would like nine of the ten times join you

Power couple thank you

You two can rely on each other to get away from the police

They ask where one is and the other covers for them

They will never catch you two alive

Acab mother fucker

I just see you two sitting by the fire and it’s strangely romantic

Like her head on your shoulder and your head on hers?

Yeah it’s a weird aesthetic, but damn isn’t it to die for?

[wildechild17]

i’m fucking screaming...  law and order svu is on and stabler is back. granted, he’s on a new task force but still. i honestly haven’t enjoyed svu since stabler left, and only hung around until munch left. so cue me freaking out over this xover event.

NOT CATHY, DAMMIT. Hasn’t this woman been through enough as Stabler’s wife?

ooh nice call back to the birth of Eliot junior... 

Oh, damn did they get the kids back too?! Okay is that Kathleen? Damn! And is that dickie or Eliot jr? How many kids did they have again? Five?

Okay, good that Cathy’s holding on...

i know i’m going to watch organized crime yet. 

So everyone in the precinct knows about Stabler, good. Bad? Idk.

Stabler still has that danger vibe and temper of his, good to know. 

Fin and Stabler and Benson... only three of the best of the show. god i’ve missed this crew...

see, even Cathy misses the good old days! but she’s got a point... ten years and not a single word?! my heart...

okay but the Benson/Stabler shippers are about to go nuts, aren’t they? kill me please because i am still lowkey one. 

sudden thought: Barbra and Stabler? i want to know how’d they get along. probably... not the best, but maybe they’d have their moments.

sudden thought number 2: STABLER AND NOAH.

YEP LETS GET INTO THE EMOTIONAL NITTY GRITTY ABOUT STABLER WALKING AWAY FROM LIV.

oh, damn yep, the shippers are gonna go nuts.

Olivia is still defending Stabler, good for her. honestly... there were moments i kinda thought Stabler got a little rough, but still. i support these two.

son of a bitch, how much has changed in terms of places and settings of this show? also what the fuck is up with Stabler and secrecy now. dammit. yep, i’m watching Organized Crime too tonight.

WAIT STABLER WAS GOING TO LIV’S CEREMONY?! hnggg i can’t take the emotional feels from this. 

“Son? Good for her.” ... do i detect a bit of wistfulness in Stabler’s tone? AND JEALOUSY WITH THE FACT SHE DATED?!

WHAT THE FUCK NO CATHY---

Wait when the FUCK did fin start dating again. 

damn that’s a list of crimes Stabler’s working, and... kinda cool ngl

Carisi was an ex-cop, so no wonder this guy mistook him for a cop instead of a lawyer.

my aunt in commercial break: i think cathy might die this episode me: I HOPE TO HELL SHE DOESN’T. also me: is the next episode also a crossover?? *clicks to see summary* devastating personal loss.... .... MOTHERFUCKER.

godddd this entire episode is just. oof. i can’t even. 

who the fuck is this new lawyer--

oh. oh god. oh no. that silence does not speak good things-- OH FUCK NO. NO. NOT CATHY. GOD FUCKING DAMMIT. hasn’t stabler been through enough?!

dammit fucking hell i can’t even vocalize--

okay so that answers that, Eli’s in Rome and it’s Dickie who’s been in this episode.

Fin what the hell are you planning. You gonna do what you and Munch did that one time and--- and the bastard’s dead. of course. so who’s behind this? ya’ll are gonna put your lives at stake for this aren’t you? of fucking course you are.

SOMEONE BETTER START TALKING BEFORE I GO POSTAL.

WHY THE FUCK IS SVU CALLED OFF WHAT THE FUCK.

Aaaand here we go Stabler’s Revenge Mode has been activated. Now we get to see who he is today. Is he speaking Italian?? oh, damn I kinda love this new Stabler, not gonna lie.

aight time to throw myself into organized crime and a whole damn new fandom.

nice update on the classic law and order theme tho. 

[mocacheezy]

Things that made watching Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen easier and even enjoyable:

🍴🥄🔪🍴🥄🔪🍴🥄🔪🍴🥄🔪🥄🔪🍴🥄

Okay, first of all I have to share a couple of screenshots where I went "Damn, this looks beautiful" (I bet it looks even better in HD)

Like really, she looks gorgeous, this was such a gorgeous shot like. Woah.

Okay the scenery! Just woah. Even before the Primes come on screen! Like it's gorgeous!

If I didn't know this was from the movie I could easily imagine this being a stock image that you find when you search for "lovers, embrace, sunset, orange". A really gorgeous image.

Optimus. Oh, Optimus Prime. He's mighty fine.

How gruesome the fights were.

Like listen, we see Optimus bleed pink energon. I think Jetfire bled blue. When Ravage got his spine torn out by Bumblebee (LIKE DAMN! WHAT?! THAT WAS SUCH A SHOCK TO ME???) his energon was green, as well as some other Decepticons.

The twins introduction

An ICE CREAM TRUCK! I was laughing at the decals and stuff, it was great. I was kind of surprised they were twins and not just one very grumpy autobot. Honestly wanted to see more of the ice cream truck shenanigans and was slightly surprised at how easy it is for these guys to change altmodes. It's like putting on a different set of clothes... No idea how their machinery handles drastic changes bit hey, not going there.

This gorgeous woman, whose kisses apparently taste like diesel

Alien fuckers, stand up, and look at the beauty. "What that tongue do?" gets a whole new meaning woth this lady. She'll blow your mind.

This dude getting a heaping of "fuck you for being an asshole".

Like, even if his/his supperiors reasons for being vary were justified (though the autobots should've proven themself trustworth because of the stuff that went down in the first movie), he really didn't have to be so shitty and entitled about delivering the message and answering questions. Loved how Lennox scared him shitless and caused him to yeet himself out all on his own. I hope he got peed on by a goat. ^u^

Just the general contrast of the respect/disrespect towards transformers.

Listen, when Optimus dies and the helicopters hauling his body back to the hangars drop him to the floor like a sack of potatoes... I'm sorry, but I did find it funny, like. In death, it doesn't matter if you're the leader of Autobots or Decepticons, there will be no respect for you from the military.

And then you have Lennox and his team giving Prime his own giant af parachute. Like look at this:

(now that I think of it, that could've just been because they couldn't safely land, but let a girl be optimistic aight? They care for the big guy and have respect for his corpse.)

The Tomb of Primes

Favourite shot.

It looked both haunting and awe inspiring and seeing the Matrix actually crumble in Sam's hands? Yeah, I was actually worried. Actually kind of shocked. I also didn't know how they'll get this revival metal pixie dust into Optimus, and if they even will be able to get it from that sock (A SOCK! I mean there wasn't much on hand but A SOCK?! I am chuckling, the fate of the last Prime, held in a piece of fabric that was on a human's foot. Beautiful.)

Megatron and his ressurection and servitude AND LOOK AND THAT HE LISTENS TO STARSCREAM?! TO STARSCREAM?!?!

First things first, I love that we see a Decepticon medic and his team go underwater, to the point that is "too cold" and the millitary deemed unaccessible (I don't blame them but it's still hilarious), that we see the guy go "yeah tear up the small one for spare parts" and see the repair process. Like. Megatron is already getting covered by algae, he is rusting (he was rusted before, but salt water REALLY isn't helping his complexion), but somehow this medic managed to patch him up enough that the guy shoots out of the water, flies STRAIGHT to Cybertron and returns to Earth. Apparently his name is Scalpel. He deserves a BestMedic Award.

The way Megatron spoke to Sam? Yes, prepare a coffin, but oooooooooh that voice. Again, chills. Chillsssssssss. The way he spoke is literally "You are in so much fucking trouble and I will snap in just a moment". It's the "You will regret being born." kind of soft voice. I think he actually said that and yes, 'twas amazing.

The way of speakinh kind of reminded me of Megan for a moment. And it's weird saying that, given that Megatron's VA was Hugo Weaving (first two movies), and not Frank Welker. I was quite shocked by that revelation while I read the credits, because woah... I thought the VA of original Megatron would voice well... Megatron. Since they had him in the movie.

Welker voiced Soundwave however (+ a bunch of the other characters) and it was amazing. Loved the satellite man's design too, 10/10.

Megatron being an apprentice of The Fallen? Now THAT, that was both strange and amazing. I also wonder if that would make Starscream Megatron's apprentice? Because it doesn't seem like it, but hey, what do I know, maybe Fallen would also smack around Megatron if he had the strenght.

But also, Starscream talking to Megatron after the Fallen falls again for good. (that was SO BRUTAL, like Optimus? Congratulations that was horrifying).

Sometimes cowards do win, whatever you say Screamo, just get your master the fuck out of here. AND HE DID!! Like, MEGATRON listened to Starscream. STARSCREAM!!!

I have watched 3 continuities so far (or well, Cyberverse is in process), and Starscream is not someone Megatron listens to. Ever.

The times he does usually end up in disaster (looking at you TFA Megs, you idiot, the space duck planted a bomb on your back you imbecile-), so seeing him not only listen to Starscream, but listen to Starscream saying that cowards flee, aka that Megatron is a coward by listening to Starscream... I am pretty sure Megatron seeing his master and one of the last Primes killed by his once-brother shook him enough that he was kind of registering stuff somewhere far away.

It's great.

Hatchlings aka Cybertronians do reproduce and it is via fluid filled slimy egg sacks

Now I wasn't able to pay much attention because

1. It took me around 3 to 4 weeks to finish the movie (my attention span has been bitchy and the movie DOES last 2h 30minutes)

2. There was The Fallen, Megatron and Plot happening.

3. Despite lasting 2h and 30minutes, there is so much happening I just nodded along going "Aight, that's a thing, aight aight" during most of the movie. No process, giant robot punch punch.

But anyways, I love that there are hatchlings, I wonder if this is where the Sparkling originate from. (because to my knowledge - that is remember from a friend talking about a comic/book where transformers mitosis was a thing - that and the Allspark are the only ways we know of them reproducing up to this point? There's also the Quintessons, but I don't know enough about them to say that for certain. Pretty sure they were the ones to make G1 transformers tho. Again, need to actually watch G1, this is all knowledge I kind of remember.)

If it is, thanks Bayverse, this is why there's so much good mechpreg AND variety in carrying! I remember reading a really good fic where the sparkling split from OP's spark and crawled out and to the first port he could to feed on energon. It was completely different than most sparkling fics and I loved it. Alien, just like Cybertronians are <3

I was also surprised the Autobots never mentioned their young? Then again, that would probably not put the military to rest in regards to fear over their planet being taken over.

But anyways, HATCHLINGS! Give me some cute imagery of the little ones! They did look cute for that one second we saw them.

The difference in Decepticons faces vs Autobots

Including the "good guys have color, bad guys don't" advantage, the Autobots have more human looking features on their faces. If it was done simply to put humans at ease, or if it is something that's just connected with how Matrix forms certain Cybertronians, doesn't matter, but the 'Cons still look gorgeous.

This movie serves both sides of the humanoid-alien-robot-fuckers: Humanoid, distinctive features, not many sharp edges (Autobots), insect-like/in-human looking features that blend together because of lack of color. Many sharp edges, very much alien (Decepticons).

I do find it surprising that Megatron looks, at least face design wise, more Autobot than Decepticon. Then again, he is old, Jetfire also had a more "human" looking face. Could be evolutionary trend?

All 'Cons have salivating problems. I find that amusing.

Scalpel, I have praised you before, please tutor some of the soldiers and find a way to minimize the amount of oral lubricant going to waste. Death by overheating of systems is not how a Decepticon warrior should offline.

Wheelie and Mikaela

Look look look, forst of all Mikaela was such a badass. She was amazing. I loved nearly every moment she was on screen, and the way she handled this lil shit? Amazing.

I also love the way she baby-talk-threatened him. Granted, no idea how she found him humping her leg cute, but hey. Our girl is amazing, she can joke, she can look Megatron in the eye while her boyfriend is being addressed and listening to command of said huge Alien that is much closer to her than to her boyfriend.

This woman has it all, but seeing Wheelie interact with her? Now THAT was just a fun time.

Where did Wheelie go though? I don't remember when he got lost, I hope the lil fella finds a good home.

Or maybe he got eaten by Devastator.

Devastator

Your pants are not stain free if you see this guy in person. The transformation AND design were awesome, I do wish we heard him speak though.

Then again, english for the Autobots, Decepticons are too proud (and their language too pretty to be ignored)

I am pretty sure this is all, I might be missing some things. It was entertaining, it was long, it was strange and gruesome without being too disgusting, and we got

✨ HATCHLINGS! ✨

No, I will not shut up about them, why do you ask?

[divine-draws]

okay i had a whole google doc that i wrote a buncha shit but imma try to CONDENSE it and make my ideas more clear bc there was some wishy washy in there. BUT dabihawks ice skating au bc im gay for that shit. all of it under the cut bc this shit is gunna get LONG. buckle in fuckers. ALSO FEEL FREE TO ASK ME ABOUT this i will be happy to answer shit :3c

SO fair warning before we begin. i know shit about ice sports. im like 1) not THAT educated nor have i legit participated though ive always wanted to and 2) this is just self indulgent so like if i dont get shit right or whatever dont come at me bro. im here to have FUN and live a bit vicariously. also as for location of all this shit i dont know and dont care and am american so my perspective on things are skewed. anyway cw: abuse mention

so dabi (touya) is a previous figure skater

he’s a figure skating prodigy 

enji was a pro hockey player (id say figure skating but this man was BUILT like a brick shithouse idk man) has a lot of championships under his belt but doesnt even begin to touch the legacy of his one sided rival yagi toshinori

him and rei meet and marry at a young age. she like.. actually liked him then?? shit was kinda okay but things kinda.... got bad quick. the abuse etc was ... yeah. she ends up having dabi and fuyumi (they’re twins babeyy) at a young age too and kinda doesnt feel like she can get out of her horrible marriage 

we wont dwell too much on the bad part of all of this though. anyway rei was a figure skater

p well known and known for her fucking GRACE god she moved so well on the ice.

she was so beautiful and spoke through her movements and enji loved that... and so as a hockey player and with a (now previous) figure skater wife he was like aight my kids WILL take up an ice sport and be the FUCKING BEST

dabi isnt made for hockey. enji tries to get him into it but it’s... nah... fuyumi isnt the best with figure skating. she’s good!! and her and dabi do some pair skating when they’re younger but it’s.. hm. dabi is the one with the clear talent here. (fuyumi is a beast on the ice when it comes to hockey though. will dominate. but she kinda... didnt really continue with it)

enji isnt PLEASED that his son isnt gunna be a hockey player but he still values figure skating and will fucking make sure he’s the BEST at it. and so the brutal training starts. he gets some good coaches and also takes up the coaching mantle 

the thing is.. rei was amazing as a skater but her body just... wasnt really made for all of that??? and dabi unfortunately kinda inherited that. his body hates the impacts and such. he’s amazing at figure skating. he has a grace similar to his mothers but there’s something more fierce to him. 

and honestly !!! he gets far!!

also natsuo comes around. he’s a bit too clumsy for either sport and resents the fact that him and fuyumi are neglected by their father. he also loves touya and gets so pissed seeing his brother so hurt

and shouto is born and this kid was made to be on the ice. he’s skating from the moment he can fucking stand on his own.

obvs enji’s attention is split but it’s mainly on touya who is winning championships and GOING places but it’s still not good enough

anyway idk how far he goes?? but it’s the biggest competition yet and on ice mid routine he lands wrong

one thing leads to the next and he’s pretty much medically retired from a young age. he can skate. he can still kinda preform but he cant do what he used to at ALL and he cant keep up with the brutal pace enji sets. there’s a lot of trying to push him still and it’s just.. not happening

for all it’s worth dabi is kinda glad he isnt doing it anymore. but he fears for his babies brother. shouto is a natural and while yes being a professional athlete of any sort is brutal on your body, his body is a lot more capable

but like touya before, shouto is pushed to his absolute limits. bleeding and injuries and puking his guts out from being pushed too far

there’s a lotta resentment but he still pushes through w skating. 

(side note but there DEF is some todomido/tododeku w hockey player izuku who ends up being coached by THE yagi toshinori and who helps shouto out w making shit his own)

anyway so in the end dabi ends up working at a rink tho lol

it’s p much owned by shigarai and run by the lov (who in this au end up making their own little ragtag unofficial local hockey team p much and play games against other teams like them)

despite his father’s whole career, dabi does enjoy playing hockey with these dipshits

but yeah he enjoys his time working at the rink, fucking around and sleeping in random places and sometimes running the zamboni

he’s also best frenemies with shigaraki. they get along and both deal with a shitty upbringing and despite some slight animosity they both would kill if someone fucked w the other 

(also at some point dabi DEF teaches some little kid classes lol)

also dabi does sometimes skate his own routines from time to time. only when he’s alone really. though fuyumi has a pass to be there though he will gripe still

SO HAWKS AM I RIGHT??

now there is a couple ways to go with this and somewhere in me there is an au with hockey player hawks who takes skating lessons from figure skater dabi BUT

i think for this au we’ll just say he was a figure skater from the get go

i think he WANTED to do hockey as a kid. like shouto he’s also a fucking natural and was skating as soon as he could fucking stand and walk. and he looked up to enji and kinda wanted to take up hockey but 

listen,,, trans hawks. who wanted to be like todoroki enji and be a pro hockey player. shit just.. didnt work like that though and besides he’s a tiny dude and god he’d be fucking obliterated 

he kinda is self taught and the ice is his escape from his shitty home life

idk how this works but listen gotta tie in the commission somehow???

he’s scouted or whatever for figure skating at a very young age and his mom is happy to take the heavy scholarships and happy to sign him over to skate for these ppl and have them push him to be The Best

and this kid is FAST. he’s fast and is insane with his jumps and stg it almost looks like he’s FLYING (which gets him the nickname hawks)

the coaches are brutal and shit sucks and a lot of the time it kinda sucks the life out of the sport but he still enjoys it

he has a love for outfits that legit have flare to them (also im thinking of johnny weir’s one outfit w the feathers but yknow instead of white they are RED) and while he does do routines to boring ass music he mainly likes doing shit different (also dabi was p much forced the whole time to do shit to that boring ass music but on his own he’d use his own music taste to skate to)

and he’s good!! he GOES places. he’s like makes it to the olympics at a young age and is one of THE youngest gold medalists for figure skating

im sure somewhere along the line him and dabi DID meet. it was at some competition and hawks was VIBRATING bc there’s ENJI and he wants and autograph and oH GOD IS THAT HIS SON??? he’s HOT. (and at this time dabi still had his red hair and like no piercings and what little ones he had they were out but this dumbass will not recognize him later on)

but god he needs to chill TF out or he will fuck up in the competition 

he hears about dabi’s whole accident and like feels for him but again it’s not like they were friends. there was more of a slight rivalry and they barely spoke if they did

but so idk like.. between seasons hawks finds himself going like nearly every day to this rink.. aka shigaraki’s rink (also sidenote but lbr it’s really run by shirakumo who kinda has to fucking herd the cats w this group)

as frenemies dabi and shigaraki share their distaste for some of these pro athletes (tho some get a pass) and kinda complain about hawks a bit tho like..... shigaraki cant complain TOO much bc of the money from hawks renting out the rink for a few hours almost every day

dabi is too gay for this shit when he actually sees hawks in action. rip him 

tbh they dont really interact tho (besides dabi telling him to gtfo the rink or he’ll run him over with the zamboni) until one day that hawks catches dabi skating

he was done and should have been gone but he forgot something on the bleachers and then he sees dabi and.. oh boy he’s GAY AF

and also dabi is RLLY GOOD???

and so hawks makes a FOOL of himself and startles the poor guy and p much presses all the wrong buttons w asking why he doesnt compete or something

and i mean im sure they had some SLIGHT progress w talking before. nothing significant but god the walls go RIGHT THE FUCK UP and dabi is pissed

tbh dabi was gunna get to the point where he LEGIT talked to him and maybe lowkey asked him out (he says this but shigaraki calls his bluff) and now there is no way. he storms off and tries to avoid him so hard

and hawks tries to corner him a bit but after some time he does manage to corner him and be like pls just let me take you out to dinner to make up for that shit????

aaand dabi accepts bc listen okay he cant say no to free food ??? like he’s kinda pissy w this guy but also.. listen he has EYES 

anywayyy p much this just leads to them dating

hawks DEF looks him up and watches all the vids of him and like the idiot he is realizes that he met him before ( “oh my GOD i know you” “uh… we’re dating i hope u know me?????”  “nO I MEAN WE MET AT (insert comp)”)

but before that dabi did like tell him some shit. mainly about like how he used to skate blah blah and the whole thing that ended all of that

he doesnt really delve too deep into like his shitty childhood until well later

idk what leads to it but the convo finally comes up and it’s so draining for dabi and hawks is horrified and ready to fight his dad (“listen i just sharpened my skates i’ll just-”)

anyway some side things bc this is long and i will answer questions on this tho

rumi is a women’s pro hockey player and fuyumi who actually follows hockey and shit has the BIGGEST crush on her (they end up together)

also natsuo comes to see one of the leagues games (he hasnt really seen them play tbh?? he hears about it from dabi but he lives like at least a few hours away on campus and is going for med school so rip him) and like he meets shigaraki and anyway dabi is losing his FUCKING MIND bc his best frenemy/boss and his younger brother are FLIRTING. RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM???

dabi and hawks are really gay together and have skated together by this point and made out on ice a few times and shigaraki was miserable and is like “NOW U KNOW!!” and dabi is pissed bc “yEAH BUT THAT”S MY LITTLE BROTHER??? IT”S NOt thE SAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” 

[yaroshien]

I got high and also watched Maleficent 2. A review.

The 2nd Maleficent movie was stupid. It end right, with the whole shit at the end. And for some strange reason, the fucking porcupine and mushroom looking assholes hang out the porcupine character kisses mushroom and I'm like, "These two fuckers had the least amount of character development to be already swinging at mother fuckin second base"

It had some stupid shit about how it was like 5 years after the first film. And like, Mal gets framed for some stupid shit. And the Queen, an absolute bitch ass evil step queen mother ass shit, Is all like, I gotta protect my country from Mal because a curse here and NOWHERE THE FUCK ELSE IN THE ENTIRE CINIMATC UNIVERSE. Which she fixed BY The ByAnyways. Mal gets pissy because the Queen got all evil and shit at the fucking thanks wedding-mas dinner. So for some dumbass reason, the queen planned to get Mal all riled up while also assuming Mals exit plan because said planned sending some fucking FREAK who BTW, looks like a talking head standing in front of those cardboard cut outs at the MALL. Mal with a iron musket shot by using a, AND I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP, Crossbow! Because Disney didn't have the fucking balls to use one deadly weapon or the other. Mal hits a river, goes off the waterfall, LIKE A CHAMP, but wasn't chad enough to wake up after being glocked, concussed and drowning, gets saved by discount Idris Elba. So like, Aroura be like, wow, this really bad idea was like, I'mma gonna go talk to her . But can't find Mal. Which sucks because the King passing out is not her fault, but since there is no apparent judicial system and nobody doing any fuck off detective work like a highly militant kingdom SHOULD HAVE, Queenly mick dum dum face is setting up the death of the entire forest because kingdom safety and future shit, nobody cared. So Mal finds out she is like, a living relative of the phoenix that made her whole race, who hid themselves below the earth, fucking minutes away from the kingdom that wants to kill them, smart move on the Discount Elba. And there's this whole group of dudes that wanna war and Discount Elba is like, thats a them thing, let me show you around the place and shit. Mal gets all "Cool but I'm not contractually obligated to give a single fuck”. There is some fucko making iron dust to kill all the forest people and gets everyone all stuck inside of a rock show the the MOTHER FUCKING FREAK who is just jizzing themselves in this performance because the O faces made from FREAK made me get very upset very fast. The blue bitch dies and gets turned back into flowers to stop the dustining thus ruining the FREAK's plan and the closes thing Disney has ever made to a climax rejection porn video. Anyways, there's this huge fight Mal is gonna kill the queen, Phil is about to kill a Fey dude who grumbled every time he was in shot enough people just know what he is thinking, flys off. Mall gets to the Queen and is talking hot shit, oh yeah and also Mal killed like 8 dudes by magicking them off a tower, falling to the painful, trauma educed death, and even if they did survive the fall, nobody can guarantee they won't get dysentery and die even longer, more painful deaths. Arouras is like, you me mum, and I wuv you. Mal is like, you don't know me, Aroura is like, but MUUUUM, and Angelina is like, aight. However the sneeky bitch of a queen uses a Crossbow, which I now have to retract my former statement, good on Disney, and tries to shoot Aroura, Mal swings her around and gets DUSTED, like, old school finger snap, Thanos’ed, dusting. And Aroura ugly cries like she don't know this a Disney movie and also somehow SUPERNATURAL. Mal comes back looking like a giant bird {Sees Aladdin} HEY! HEY! I fuckin see you. And Queen pushes Aroura off a tower, but gets caught by the other Fey people, but not... punished??? But gets turned into a goat I promise. But that gets worse later. Mal saves Aroura, they meet up with PHIL, and also the King, who decides not to have his wife turned back because BROS BEFORE HOES, not really, he found out she a bitch and very much could have killed him because Mal was the only one capable of healing him for realsies because the spindle in the first movie had the curse on the needle APPARENTLY! 

There is a wedding, Blue bitch is still dead,. the kissing happens, I'm mad, Angelina gets to fly off into the sunset with really bad green screened kid feys, the end, thank you for reading Yaro got really high and watched Maleficent 2 because he found out there was one.

[japiform]

Logs: Run out of creative titles to use

crepuxulum D »—> Reaching only for the most pathetic of targets, are you @japiform

japiform you think so little of me?

crepuxulum D »—> You’ve given me no evidence otherwise

japiform i could weep from this slanderous talk, like i ain't been a magnanimous, merciful motherfucker at least a few times before

crepuxulum D »—> If you could rattle even two e%amples from that rusty clod of a thoughtsponge I’d be shocked

japiform aight the first one, when i let you go the second one, when i fuckin trekked across the galaxy to save this ungrateful motherfucker's hide how do you think i KNOW he's sleepin?

crepuxulum D »—> Neither of those were mercies D »—> What are you doing to him

japiform hahaha i coulda done worse japiform i'm just patchin him up. helpin ease the tender mercies of her fishiest's most careless touches japiform he's down a limb or four, but he's breathin. not /rottin/ no more. not in motherfuckin /pain/

crepuxulum D »—> I do so loath it when you are intentionally obtuse D »—> You have more to gain from this than a laugh, and I doubt it is the Empress’ favor

japiform hahaha no she's gonna be PISSED but i'm tellin the truth, departed brother mine all i'm doin, the /only thing/ i'm doin, is healin him up

crepuxulum D »—> Why

japiform seemed a shame, to let him fry after he just met his favorite kitten, didn't it? plus, i think he's funny hahaha

crepuxulum D »—> And what happens ne%t, once he awakens D »—> If you decide he is no longer amusing

japiform well, that's up to you and your little kitten bitch, of course

crepuxulum D »—> Do not call her that

japiform whatever pick a name for her, i don't really care

crepuxulum D »—> It’s Survivor, unless three consecutive syllables are too much for you D »—> You aren’t trying to lure us out there

japiform i think i can handle so long a word, expatriate like you'd go for so transparent a trap hahahahaha like /she/ would i ain't stupid :o) i'll just give him to ya

crepuxulum D »—> You do not just D »—> Give things D »—> Not without e%pecting something in return

japiform i'm gettin old, thinkin of turnin over a new leaf or two

crepuxulum D »—> Horsefeathers

japiform no need ta use that kinda language, motherfucker

crepuxulum D »—> I don’t know why I’ve gone beating my skull against a brick wall like this

japiform believe whatever the fuck you want, but i'm only tellin you the truth anyway, show this to your survivor so she knows what's goin on

crepuxulum [Unspeakable terrors. That was a face you haven’t seen in a long, long time, but he’s unmistakable.] D »—> This is a miserable e%cuse of a joke

japiform i don't really understand why you're expectin it to be a joke do i need ta pop a fuckin newspaper on his chest, what's goin on here?

crepuxulum D »—> Letting her believe that he’s dead, keeping him in your custody

japiform i didn't let her believe shit, i didn't know he was gonna spout that shit honestly i was hopin to get him fixed up a little better, make it a nicer surprise motherfucker's makin shit difficult for me unconscious, very on brand for him hahaha

crepuxulum D »—> Despite my centuries of service, janitorial and otherwise, let us say I suddenly believe you D »—> How did you plan on reuniting them, e%actly

japiform lettin you fuckers come up with the plan and politely followin along and not gettin anywhere the fuck near you two cuz i know you'd kill me on sight

crepuxulum D »—> I am going to speak to my spade D »—> And you will no longer harass her

japiform i ain't even done nothin!

crepuxulum D »—> You’ve done enough

japiform yeah yeah go on get your little thrill orderin me around i'll be nice and polite to everyone and not do anythin bad :'o(

crepuxulum D »—> Try that cack on someone else

japiform aight he'll be waitin

crepuxulum D »—> Ugh

------

crepuxulum D »—> Beloathed

aremewkiddingme YES

crepuxulum D »—> I spoke to japiform

aremewkiddingme UNPLEASANT

crepuxulum D »—> Ha, tell me about it D »—> But D »—> He tells me Psiionic is alive, and under his care

aremewkiddingme CAT IS NYOT GOOD MEWS

crepuxulum D »—> He attached this image

aremewkiddingme FURICK

crepuxulum D »—> He told me he willing to just D »—> Give him over, however we plan

aremewkiddingme WHAT

crepuxulum D »—> I do not trust him as far as I cannot throw him, but he seemed D »—> Unusually earnest

aremewkiddingme IS HE CAPAWBLE OF EARNESTNESS???

crepuxulum D »—> Only once in a great, great while, but even then there e%sits some sort of catalyst

aremewkiddingme CATALYST... WHAT COULD PAWSIBLY BE THE CATALYST FUR THIS

crepuxulum D »—> That is what troubles me D »—> He claimed he found the Psiionic D »—> Funny

aremewkiddingme ... I DON'T MEAN TO PURRY BUT DID HE FIND MEW FUNNY?

crepuxulum D »—> He found my long suffering amusing, I’m sure

aremewkiddingme SO... WHAT DOES THIS MEAN, FUR PSIIONIC? CAN MEW EVEN GUESS?

crepuxulum D »—> I think it means he is alive, somehow, and will remain that way D »—> But that we’ve little time to liberate him before boredom sets into his host

aremewkiddingme ... WE HAVE TO GET HIM, THEN RIGHT? ... IF FUR NO OFUR REASON THAN TO GIVE HIM CLAWNTROL OFUR WHAT HAPPAWNS TO HIM

crepuxulum D »—> Of course

aremewkiddingme I DON'T LIKE THIS

crepuxulum D »—> Neighther do I, not when I cannot fathom a motive

aremewkiddingme MAYBE HE INTENDS TO MAKE US GO THROUGH A LOT OF EFFURT, AND THEN... NYOT EVEN FOLLOW THROUGH OR MAYBE PSIIONIC WILL BE MARRED IN SOME WAY PAN WASHED... I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO APAWT THOSE THOUGH, THERE IS CERTAINLY NO WAY TO STOP HIM FUROM DOING KIT... HE HAS A LOT OF PAWER

crepuxulum D »—> He does, and a miserable sense of humor, but he enjoys Psiionic’s D »—> He won’t erase a personality that he can yet wring some enjoyment out of

aremewkiddingme OKAY ... I HOPE HE WAKES UP SOON THEN MAYBE HE COULD TELL US WHAT HE WANTED

crepuxulum D »—> I hope so too

[1-800-hellraiser]

I Wanna Be your Girlfriend (BEN Drowned x Female!Reader)

Requested by: No one

Pages: 7.2 

Words: 2,637

Associated song: I wanna be your girlfriend - Girl in Red

!Tw! Swearing and mentions/a picture of facial scaring, that's about it.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

"I don't wanna be your friend, I wanna be your bitch. And I wanna touch you but not like this."

   "Yo fuckers, I'm going down to the convince store, you want any thing?" You ask to the three pastas lounging on the couch. The other two pastas shake their heads, but the third one makes himself known. "Could you get me a blue raspberry slushie please?" He asks slinking his head upside down over the back couch, his golden locks flowing straight down. You chuckle at the childish nature of the virus. "Sure thing, BEN." You exit the mansion and begin walking. 

   As you're walking out of the forest, you itch your face slightly, your breath hitches at the painful sensation. When you first got to the mansion, a certain monochrome fuck decided to pick a fight with your unstable, shaken up ass. He left you with four long scars down your face. Thankfully, he didn't damage your eye at all. 

   You don't bother wearing a mask to hide your face. You simply don't have the energy to give a fuck. You understand why people stare, it's odd and unusual to have that type of scaring. You don't mind, curiosity gets the best of us sometimes.

   Anyways, you reach the convince store and pad inside. Inside was a wonderland of junk. Everything from Twinkies to state made craft beer. Your eyes wander around before spotting the slushie machine. There are four selections of slushie to choose from. There's Coke, blue raspberry, cherry, and green apple. You go to grab a cup, but then realize BEN had never mentioned a size. Quickly, you pull out your phone and text BEN.

Y/n

Yo BEN, what size do you want?

    You decide to get your own slushie too. You pull out a medium cup and cover, then choose your flavor. You gently push back the lever and watch the mix of flavor syrup and crushed ice enter your cup. You take a red straw and poke it into the slushie. You almost forget about BEN's slushie until you feel your phone buzz in your non dominant hand. 

Lil' Green Bitch

Uhhhhh, get me a medium plz 

Y/n 

'Aight

   You take another medium cup and fill it with the blue slushie. You grab another straw for BEN and stick it in the back pocket of your jeans along with your phone. You walk up to the  depressed looking teenage cashier and put both drinks on the counter. You pull out your wallet before hand, so it isn't as awkward trying to pay. The cashier looks up the price for the slushies, since there is no barcode. 

    "Your total is $3.25 miss." The cashier sighs out. You open your wallet and pull out exact change. You hand the cashier your money and slide your wallet back into your pocket. "Have a good day." "You too sir." You reply, grabbing the slushies and leaving. You start your walk back to the mansion. 

    "I'm back bitches." You announce, opening the front door. You look around for your favorite green midget, but he's nowhere to be seen. "Have any of you seen BEN?" You ask the two other pastas, who are still on the couch. You close the door with your foot and walk over to the couch. "I think he went to his room." Jeff rasps, you nod and thank him. 

   You know where BEN's room is by memory because you and BEN have weekly sleepovers. Speaking of which, you're having one tonight in BEN's room. Your heart flutters at the thought of such a thing. You and BEN are best friends, you hit it off when you two first met. You started developing feelings for the glitch, you've crushed on him for almost a year now. You always keep your cool around him though, as to not raise any suspicion. 

   You knock at his room door, waiting for him to come out. "Coming!" He says through the door. You hear some shuffling from the other side and a small 'ow'. A few seconds later, he opens the door. You try and hide your blush the best you can, as he us wearing a black tank top and white boxers with the triforce symbol all over them. 

    "Pfft, nice boxers BEN," you comment sarcastically. You see a hint of a blush across his cheeks. "Thanks, would you like to take a closer look~?" BEN flirts, you laugh. "Ew no," you laugh out, punching him in the shoulder. "Anyway, here's your slushie loser." You say, handing the slushie to BEN. "Thanks bitch." BEN replies, you chuckle. "See you tonight," you say, begining to walk away. "See you tonight," BEN concludes. 

   Walking back up to your room, you take a sip of your slushie. You wonder what you and BEN are going to do at the sleepover. You usually surprise each other, the last sleepover you had, BEN took you to McDonald's at three am and harassed the workers working the drive thru. Fun times. 

   You open your bedroom door and walk in. Your room is decorated with posters you stole from victim's homes. You also have LED lights (also stolen) around the perimeter of your room. They're off right now, so you pick up the remote and set them to f/c. You smile proudly at the LED's, you also have Polaroid's strung up on some wire you found in the mansion. You have ones with you and BEN, you and Clockwork, you and Jeff, and you and your old friends. 

   You have the photos because you snuck back to your old house to steal some of your most important possessions. You also have a lava lamp you bought from Spencer's, it looks dope. You take off your shoes and set them next to your door, and set your slushie on your nightstand. You decide to take a nice, hot shower.

   You grab a pair of black leggings that are ripped all over. You also grab a black long tee shirt that goes down to your mid thigh. It shows your s/t shoulders and has a graphic of a skeletal hand with a cigarette with the words 'smoking kills' in cursive, white letters. It has the classic two bold white stripes on the sleeves. You also grab some clean undergarments and socks.

   You pad into the bathroom and close the door behind you. You turn on the faucet and put your hand underneath the water flow to test the warmth. As soon as the water hit your hand, you reel back and hiss in pain. You turn the knob a bit and wait for the water to cool down. As soon as the water cooled down enough, you slip the rest of your body into the shower.

    You step out of the steaming shower and wrap yourself in a towel. You dry your hair and style it however you would like. You slip on your undergarments and socks first. Then, you pull on your ripped leggings, making sure you don't get your feet caught and rip them more. Then, you slip your long shirt on over them. You put on some deodorant and check your phone, Your phone clock reads 5:54.

   "Shit!" You whisper as you go back to your room and grab your shoes. You're supposed to meet in BEN in his room at 6 pm (18:00). You put them on quickly and grab a f/c drawstring bag sitting in the corner of your room. You snatch the bag and fill it with your phone, phone charger, a blanket, some extra cash, and your handy dandy pocket knife. 

    You almost fall down the stairs trying to get to BEN's room in time. You bust open his door at exactly 6 pm (18:00), panting like you just ran a marathon. "Hey princess." BEN greets nonchalantly, you wave at him back. "Alright, since you took me somewhere on our last sleepover, I was thinking I could take you to some places, if you're up for it." BEN nods and gets up off his bed. "Alright, let's get our stuff set up first before we go." You nod and take the blanket out of your bag. 

   You observe the setup you and BEN have made and nod proudly. BEN set up a t.v on the floor and you both built a pillow fort to watch scary movies in when you both are done being teenage hooligans. Next to the t.v is a mini fridge BEN kept in his room for your sleepovers. He also has it in his room because he will deck anyone that eats his leftovers. 

   "Ready?" You ask, turning to BEN, "Yup, ready." You grab your drawstring back full of essentials and leave with BEN. Once you get out side, BEN asks you where you're going. "I was thinking we could hit up McDonalds, then walk around until we find an abandoned building to hang in." You explain, BEN nods, "Sounds like a plan to me." 

   You both arrive at the pretty beaten up McDonald's and you both walk in. "Welcome to McDonalds, how may I take your order?" The cashier asks boredly, you turn to BEN. "I'll take a ten piece chicken McNugget please." BEN responds politely, rocking back and forth on his heels. "Okay, and what about you Miss?" "I'll  take a f/o (favorite order) please!" The cashier nods and rings the order up. "Your total is $13.45." You nod and dig in your bag for your wallet. 

   "Don't worry N/n, I got you." BEN states and pulls a twenty out of seemingly nowhere. "O-oh, thank you B." You gush, that was very kind of him. So kind of him, it made your heart beat harder in your chest. "Alright, your food will be out in a minute." The  cashiers words snap you out of your lovey daze. You nod and walk over to a table to sit at while waiting for your food with BEN. 

   "What's our order number?" You ask, BEN looks back at the receipt. "Uhhh, order number 69, nice." He chuckles, you giggle back. "I have another question, where did the twenty come from?" BEN chuckles again. "I always have spare change in my hat." He takes off his hat and hands it to you, you peer inside and see another ten dollars and five quarters. 

   "Woah, that is the most epic magic trick I've ever seen." You say sarcastically at BEN, he chuckles. "My pleasure, Y/n." "Order 69?" You her somebody shout, you turn to BEN. "I'll go get it." You say, standing up from the booth. "Thank you miss!" You chirp at the cashier that just gave you your order. You set the tray down and begin to eat. 

   After you and BEN are done, you take care of the tray and leave. "So, where to now?" BEN asks, you smile, a great idea popping into your head. "I know the perfect abandoned house to hang out in, its a 15 minute walk from here," You explain to BEN. "Ok, lead the way N/n." You clasp your hands together in excitement. Hopefully, your plan is going to go smoothly.

    Your plan is to go to the abandoned house, and explore with BEN for a bit. After that, you lead him up to a window that you can get to the roof from. You are going to sit on the roof with BEN and tell him how you feel. Hopefully, he feels the same way about you.

   You arrive at the abandoned house with BEN. You both walk up to the front door, "After you m'lady," BEN motions, tipping his hat. "Thank you my fair gentleman." You took a bow and enter the building, both of you giggling. You carefully step around fallen debris and rotten floorboards. You make sure that BEN was also being safe, you love BEN, but he is quite a handful. 

   You both walk into the dust covered living room.  There was an ugly yellow rug lying in the floor, and a black table sitting on top. Two beige recliners are sitting at opposite angles facing towards the wall. Behind that, was a window with spindly white curtains. You both investigate the living room before moving on to the rest of the house. 

   The house is very small, it only has a living room, a kitchen, two bathrooms and one bedroom. So, you move on to the kitchen. The kitchen had a pretty white wallpaper with pastel pink flowers all over it, it looks like someone painted the flowers with watercolors. Theres noting in the kitchen other than the cabinets and sink. You look in the sink and on the counters. BEN snoops through the cabinets. He finds nothing other than a single black marble. 

    "Yo, N/n, look what I found." BEN says, showing you the completely black orb. "Woah, that's sick!" You say looking intently at the black orb. You both exit the kitchen. "Do you wanna split up for the bathrooms?" You ask BEN, "Sure" he says. So, you both split up, you go upstairs and see two doors. You don't know which one is the bathroom, so you did the best thing you could to chose which door to go into first. 

    "Eenie meenie miney mo catch the tiger by the toe, if he hollars let him go." You end, your index finger pointing at the door in the right. You open the door to the bathroom and walk in. Pretty pastel blue tiles cover the walls. You see a sink with a mirror above it, it is one of those mirror cabnets. You push on the mirror, it inverts then squeaks open. Your eyes catch on a dusty orange cylinder. You pick it up, there's no label, interesting. 

   BEN enters the bathroom downstairs. The bathroom is covered in pretty white tiles. BEN notices the sink and the mirror, he pushes on the mirror and nothing happens. He steps over to the blue shower curtain and pulls it open. Nothing is there, so he turns around to meet you upstairs. 

   You both meet in front of the door on the right, you reach out and turn the doorknob and open the door. You both enter the room and look around. The walls are painted a nice gray. The bedroom is empty,  except for a lone window leading to the roof. You go over and open the window, you motion for BEN to follow. You carefully stick your leg out onto part of the roof, then walk up the slope. BEN follows you up and sits next to you. 

   "Hey BEN, can I tell you something?" You ask, BEN gives you a curious look. "Okay, what's up?" You take a deep breath. "I brought you up here because I wanted to to tell you that, I like you, a lot. And, I hope I can be your  girlfriend?" You end shrinking down a little bit, BEN smiles at you. "I'd love for you to be my girlfriend, Y/n." He says, gently putting his thumb under your chin and lifting it up.

   Your eyes meet with his, you both lean in. His lips met yours, they're soft, but cold. It sends a chill down your spine. You both melt into the kiss, but before anything gets heated, you pull away and hug him. "Thank you, BEN." 

Best. Sleepover. Ever.

[rynhaswritersblock]

tiktok famous (hc) - part three | p.p.

summary: you and peter doing various tiktok trends. y'all know the deal

warnings: ultra chaotic writing (i have nine other drafts forgive me i am a tad bit stressed), cussing as always, and HOPEFULLY GOOD WRITING??? oh and yes as always peter being Babey

+ + +

- HI!!!!!! BACK AT IT AGAIN WITH THE TIKTOK HCS!!!!!!!

- i got a few requests/ideas from y'all for more tiktoks so here we are

- tbh since so many new trends are constantly coming out i might just make this a whole ass SERIES but we'll see

- who knows if i can even handle that

- btw:: if i forgot one or there's one you really want me to write you can comment it and i'll try to add it to this!!! if it's too long since posted though i'll add it to my drafts <3

- OKAY TIME FOR CHAOTIC ENERGY

- as mentioned in past versions of this series

- tiktok dances are ADDICTIVE!!!

- and you literally broke a goddamn sweat learning supalonely but we're NOT GONNA TALK ABOUT IT

- and you and peter are hanging out one day

- and as all of these ideas happen

- you get ~inspired~ by the for you page

- you set up the camera, flipping it so that it's facing peter and not you

- the lil shit hasn't even noticed that you got up yet what a poop

- but as soon as the music starts playing he raises his head

- you're doing the supalonely dance like a fucking BOSS

- all while pretending to be looking at yourself in the camera

- you don't let yourself stare at the screen so you don't get distracted

- but

- of course

- peter is nodding his beat to the beat, clapping for you, and when you to the body roll thing on "drinking" he lets out a whoop that makes you wheeze

- when you finish you laugh, letting out a sigh and grabbing your phone

"not gonna lie, you ate that."

"i know."

- you sit back down next to him, heart rate in da Clouds, and start watching the video

- petey boi is just sitting there like a puppy, crooked smile on his face as he watches you

- in a few parts he's even doing the dance with you

- and he looks so in awe

- you can't stop watching it and smiling at the screen

- but then the fucker sits down next to you and is like "you should post that it was really good"

- so you show him it

- his face gets all red bc he's babey

"you were videoing me??"

- OKAY NEXT ONE

- so i think we all know the rosa videos

- for the b99 fans: rosa rosa rosaaaaaaaaaaaa

- she's a QUEEN

- and you constantly quote those things like

- every time there's a silent moment you're just like "you're fucking lying let me see" and the whole team (avengers squad) is like ayo stfu

- one day y'all are just hanging in the commons of headquarters

- we're getting the band back together!

- and you start videoing cause you're bored

- you point the camera at peter

"aye dude come here?"

- everybody groans and peter gives the camera a sassy look, tilting his head

"you're gay? i fuckin-"

"language," steve mutters

"-knew it dude!" you smile, zooming in on the camera

- peter gets a confused look on his face

"wait no i'm bi"

- tony effin SHOOTS UP

- sitting like there's a goddamn board in his back

- and he slowly turns his head in your direction

- eyebrow raised

- you bust out laughing and so does everyone else, including peter

- tony's looking around like "hey what the FUCK is HAPPENING"

"stark, you didn't know?"

"NO??"

- lol we stan bi peter parker

- aight BACK TO THE SHITS AND GIGGLES

- so you and peter are obsessed with that quirky tiktok bartender girl who makes all the drinks

- i forgot her name but she's like

we're gonna do 2 ounces so that's 1, 2, 3, 4! we're gonna give it a nice strain! andddd shake shake shake shake! fun, right?

- yk what i mean

- hi it's editing ryn it's her tiktok is like paradise bartender

- and so one day

- jk one NIGHT

- it's like 2 am

- and you and peter are like

- let's make lemonade. but like. Fake Alcohol Version Because We're Underage

- and so y'all run to the kitchen

- you almost crush and die from slipping on your socks

- the two of you and laughing and giggling as you run and around and get all your materials

"where is the fucking STRAINER"

"bitch idk help me find the lemon flavor packets"

- it takes FAR too long but y'all are finally ready

- you start recording and the two of you are already laughing

"hey guys so today-"

"TODAY" he pushes you to the side "we're gonna be making LEMONADE!"

- the two of you keep laughing as you shove each other trying to be the one in charge

- so basically

- peter gets water all over the counter

- some of the ice flies out when you shake it

- the strainer DOESN'T WORK AND ALL THE STUFF GETS EVERYWHERE

- and the small amount that lands in the cup tastes like whispering lemon

- like hella watered down there's like nothing there

- the lemon is SHY

- and then in the last 10 seconds of the video bucky walks in

- and he's like wtf... wait y'all are making lemonade??

- and the three of you end up making lemonade for real and drinking it while watching infomercials

- at two in the morning

- fun, right?

- those videos are so satisfying NEXT TIKTOK

- thank u ritxal for the idea !!

- so our boi PETE HERE

- is hella addicted to those cool pov videos

- and he gets a really good idea even though it would make him a SIMP

- he ends up deciding FUCK IT I'M MAKING ONE

- MY TIKTOK ACCOUNT IS PRIVATE ANYWAYS

- so he sets up his phone and jumps around to get ~~in the zone~~

- feeling stupid as hell

- he films one of those ones where it's the "from the other side" *noise!!!!!!!!* one's yk where the ppl are like "are you sure you want to __?" and it has the yes and no buttons

- you know

- i hope

- and he puts the text on it and shrugs, posting it

- meanwhile you're home and you get the notification that peter posted a tiktok

- obviously you click on it because

- uh

- because

- and you watch it and gasp because the caption says pov and ur like who tf is this man peter never posts povs

- you watch as peter is looking nervously at the camera and text pops up saying "are you sure you want to give up?"

- he presses yes and you're like oh god oh peter wait is this a sign shit FUCK

- a new text bubble pops up saying "do you want to see her?" and you fucking yeLP

- you're like holy FUCK WAIT WHO IS HER???? WIFE???? DAUGHTER?????? HUH!!!!!!!

- and then he presses yes

- and the screen goes black

- you see urself in the screen

- and you basically DIE

- a wheeze so hard that it hurts flies out of your mouth and you IMMEDIATELY PRESS DUET

- you start filming with your phone facing the ceiling and as the beat drops (or whatever when it's like ahhhh!) you pop onto the screen, smiling

- and you're like RANDOM CONFIDENCE BOOST WHATEVER POST

- and then BACK TO PETER'S PLACE

- HE GETS THE NOTIFICATION AND IS LIKE WHAT

- AND WHEN HE SEES YOU POP ONTO THE SCREEN HE'S LIKE HOLY FUCK

- AND SO HE FACETIMES YOU

- YOU ANSWER OBVI

"y/n what the hell"

"did you like it?"

"maybe"

- okay i wanna do another pov one so here we go

- i'm sure everyone here is acquainted with the "they call me tiago.. i don't know who's margo" ones

-  these are lowkey difficult to write out so i'm just gonna lay it out for you as best i can

- really trying here

- so peter posts the boy's voice part ("no no no... they call me tiago. i don't know who's margo? i just hit this lotto" etc etc etc)

- and when it's like idk who's margo he just holds a stare with the camera in like an InTiMiDaTiNg way

- even though he's babey and a literal puppy it actually like.. works

- and when you see it you're like yes so you post the other part (that people never do lol "her name is margo" etc all the female voicing)

- and you hold the stare too and EVEN LIKE RAISE YOUR EYEBROW SUGGESTIVELY AND GIVE HIM THE LOOK IYKYK

- so BASICALLY

- i'm really trying here i can visualize these tiktoks perfectly but GOD if i don't struggle a bit while writing them

PETER'S CAPTION: pov: we're rivals on separate missions but you keep screwing with my plans so i try to intimidate you

Y/N'S CAPTION: pov: we're rivals on separate missions but i found you cute so i decide to mess around with your mission

- OH BY THE WAY THE TWO OF YOU LIVE AT AVENGERS HEADQUARTERS AND HE POSTED "YESTERDAY" SO YOU DECIDE TO POST "TODAY" AND WALK OUT OF YOUR ROOM TO WHERE HE WAS IN THE COMMONS RIGHT AFTER YOU POSTED

- can y'all tell how messy my brain is holy shit

- pls forgive me i keep getting random ideas but IT ADDS TO THE CHAOS SO IT'S FINE RIGHT

- OKAY

- BACK AGAIN

- so you post and walk out and as you turn the corner to the commons you can hear the sound play and have to stop a moment to silently scream

- thankfully no one else was in there except for peter (whose back was to you) otherwise you woulda looked INSANE

- you walk up behind him and smile as he laughs slightly and watches it another time, pulling his phone closer to his face to read the caption

"holy shit," he mutters

- he closes his eyes and smiles and tilts his head back, resting it on the back of the couch (🥺)

"you like it?"

- lol

- this kid SHOOTS UP

- HELLO

"oh my god, y/n, what are you doing"

"coming to hang out with you??"

- he sighs as you come and plop down next to him

"what the hell is this"

- he shows you his phone

"a tiktok"

- he smiles and shakes his head (doing that thing where you like look down while doing it and it's so CUTE)

"yeah. i got that."

- NEXT TIKTOK

- alright guess the scenario

- just fucking guess

- i'll wait

- ...

- you'd best BELIEVE that y'all are chilling at headquarters in the commons rn

- where da HELL ELSE

- and

- like LITERALLY EVERY OTHER TIKTOK THAT I WRITE OUT IN THESE

- YOU AND PETE BE CHILLIN

- AND YOU SET UP YOUR PHONE

- god i'm starting to question if i'm capable of writing literally anything else damn

- peter's in the background of course

- and it's this godforsaken audio i'm sure most of you have heard

- you know the one where it's like fast music and then it goes "mm, yeah" and it's usually accompanied with a video of some really pretty girl fake moaning and like rolling her eyes while pushing up her hair??

- well

- all of that

- everything i just said

- is exactly what you do

- and the thing is

- as soon as peter hears the audio he recognizes it

- are we gonna talk about the fact that peter probably spent at least a whole night watching those videos because 1) girls are really pretty and 2) every time he heard it he could vividly imagine you doing it??????? no??? okay

- so he like

- sits up

- does the thing where he rests his forearms on his knees and leans forward, glaring at you through the camera

- and in the background

- if you're paying attention

- peter FLIPS HIS SHIT WHEN YOU DO THE "MM YEAH" PART

- he tHROWS HIS ARMS IN THE AIR LIKE WHAT THE HELL DUDE I THOUGHT I GAVE YOU SIGNS THAT EVEN THOUGH WE'RE NOT A COUPLE AND WE BOTH KNOW YOU LIVE YOUR LIFE OUT OF SPITE,, DOING SOMETHING LIKE THAT ON VIDEO IS ABSOLUTELY OFF LIMITS!!!!!!!

"Y/N!"

- it's still recording and you turn around and laugh, throwing your head back as he jumps up and grabs you by the waist, pulling you in

- the two of you start play fighting just like elio and oliver from cmbyn (but a bit less steamy yk?? more innocent yet still w a bit of tension yeye)

- needless to say you keep that video in a very special place of your heart

- and so does peter like once the two of you stop wrestling you realize that the video had just been looping behind the sound of your laughter and fighting y'all watch it and it loops a few times while the two of you are silent and he finally goes "can you uh. can you send that. to me. ???????"

- next oneeeeeeeeeeeeee

- thank u lilmissquackson for the idea <3

- so in this one you and petey are dating

- and y'all decide to do the put a finger down challenge lol

- but instead of using an audio y'all decide to switch off coming up with ones on the spot

"put a finger down if your boyfriend tackles you every time you're standing near a couch or bed"

"put a finger down if your girlfriend still calls you dude"

"put a finger down if your boyfriend once webbed you to the wall because you wouldn't stand still when he was trying to kiss you"

"put a finger down if your girlfriend used her telepathic powers to keep you out of her room when she was mad at you"

"put a finger down if your boyfriend took TWO YEARS TO ASK YOU OUT"

"put a finger down if your girlfriend started laughing after you told her you liked her"

"put a finger down if you only started laughing because it TOOK YOU LONG ENOUGH"

"put a finger down if your girlfriend showed no signs of liking you before you decided to ask her out"

"put a finger down if your boyfriend is the most oblivious boy in the world"

"put a finger down if you're in love with your girlfriend but haven't said 'i love you' yet because you're scared she won't say it back"

- your jaw drops and turn to him

- needless to say you were very glad to have caught your first "i love you"s on camera

- SIDE NOTE you did not post cause after you and peter watched the video back y'all were both like "we don't wanna be THOSE bitches"

- next one woop

- thank u MrsLillianAmbrose for the idea !!

- okay buds

- so here's the thing

- i hate to under-perform

- but i feel like the best way to get the full effect of this tiktok is to watch it and then just roll with me here

- SOOOOO (if u can)

1) open tiktok 2) search @_tharealjohnnyyy_ 3) go to his account (or it might just show up when you search) 4) and scroll to the "ways to cuddle" video 5) it was posted in february 2020 if that helps give u a time reference lol

- OKAY

- I HOPE Y'ALL GOT TO WATCH IT

- I TRIED JUST PUTTING IT IN HERE BUT WATTPAD WOULDN'T LET ME AND I COULDN'T FIND IT ON YOUTUBE (let me know if one of u does!!!)

- if u weren't able to watch it (i'm so sorry) i'm gonna do the best i can to at least make this entertaining

- WOOP

- so if you could see the tiktok that's really all this is

- you and peter doing literally the same thing

- y'all are giggling in between positions and peter struggles to set the camera up every time it falls

- he ends up just webbing it to the ceiling

- and in the end the two of you fall asleep in the reverse OG position with your fingers playing with his hair 🥰🥰

- i hope that was good enough im sorry AH

- next!!

- thank u Mendesmycam for the idea <33

- okay so y'all know that sound

SOMETHING ABOUT YA GORLL

REALLY MAKES MY HEADDDD WANNA TWIRLLLLLLLLLL

- or whatever the lyrics are

- those tiktoks are SO FUNNY

- AND YOU DECIDE TO COPY THEM

- so you grab a chair and sit peter down in the middle of the room and set the camera up

- luckily for you he has a bag of cheez-its in hand that you plan to utilize later

- babey has a confused look on his face as he watches you press play and he shoves some more cheez-its in his mouth

- the music starts playing and you just about bust out laughing as you walk all around him, running your hand across his chest

- his heart is racing he's like AYO WHAT THE FUCK IS GOIN ON

"y/n what the hell are you-"

SOMETHING ABOUT YOU GIRL

- you practically snap into a weird position

- ur freaking arms are out in front of you and you're on your toes and knees are bent and you're hunched over and it's like

- a very interesting pose

- peter BUSTS OUT LAUGHING

- his eyes are all crinkly as he bends over in the chair

- you just about break but you manage to keep a straight face as you start dancing around weirdly

- needless to say you look like a goddamn CONTORTIONIST

- peter can't stop wheezing

- you make one of your hands in the shape of like the italian man hand this iykyk and fucking SWAN DIVE YOUR FINGERS INTO HIS CHEEZ-IT BAG

- meanwhile peter's STILL DYING

- and you take the cheezits and lean back, sprinkling them all over you (like the popcorn one if you saw that tiktok lmao)

- and the video finally ends and you get to laugh

"y/n what the hell was that"

"i don't know i thought you might enjoy a little entertainment"

- and of course

- that's exactly when no other than SAM WILSON fucking strolls in

- hey how y'all doin'- AHHH (get yo fucking dog bitch! ~it don't bite~ YES IT DO GET YO-)

- sorry got distracted

- and he hears you and his head SPINS ON OVER TO Y'ALL'S DIRECTION

"a little what now?"

- AIGHT GUYS

- LAST ONE

- Y'ALL ARE AT HEADQUARTERS CAUSE WHERE DA HECK ELSE

- this time you're in peter's room though

- and i'd like to imagine this one with the cool led lights because 1) tiktok and 2) i feel like peter would have those in his room

- y'all are just chilling watching hot rod (GREAT MOVIE BTW)

- and

- peter sets up the camera

- not to mention his heart is RACING RN CAUSE HE'S A NERVOUS BEAN

- and he hits record and leans back, letting out a sigh

- you don't even notice his phone literally right there cause you're just enjoying the movie

- a few seconds into the video and petey is like Visibly Freaking Out

- but a funny part plays and you laugh, looking over at him to see if he found it funny too

- he notices you're turning your head so he's like YES I LOOK AT TV HOT ROD MOVIE I AM LOOKING THAT WAY AND WASN'T STARING AT YOU OR THE CAMERA YES THIS IS A FUNNY PART I AM LAUGHING

- and then you look away

- and then he looks at you

- and ever so lightly grabs you by the chin

- and pulls you to him and plants his lips on yours

- finally, dumbass

+ + +

huzzah

i hope u guys enjoyed !!!!!!! ヽ(✿ﾟ▽ﾟ)ノ

[jacksonroseroth]

Waste Love Chapter 1

A/N: This is my first MGK/Colson Baker fic. I’m not too immersed in the fandom, so some of my scenes might be wrong/off character. Let me know. Correct me. This is only my first one. :) Hope you like it.

Warnings: Swearing, Weed Usage

Words: 4,747

Moodboard by @badwolf-in-the-impala, none of the pictures are ours

~

Jersey lounged on the couch in the bus, earbuds in as she listened to music while editing. Propped up by the armrest of the couch, with her knees up, she rested her laptop on her thighs, editing the pictures she took from last night’s show. Being Rook’s visiting cousin had its advantages. Not only did Colson hook her up with a pretty sweet bunk; Big enough that she could comfortably sit up a little more while on her computer. He also began to let her take pictures at a few shows, field testing her as the band’s photographer.

Her own photography business was slow goings to get it completely up and running--At the moment it was stumbling downhill--And she was desperate to get out of, not only New Jersey, but the States in general. She had other freelance jobs and had traveled all over the country, but never outside. When she called up her cousin, Rook, needing a good laugh and a change of pace, Rook invited her to one of their last shows in the U.S., at EST Fest, before they headed off to the European leg of the Hotel Diablo tour.

Armed with the knowledge that she was going to be backstage at a Machine Gun Kelly concert, she remembered to bring her camera this time, every other visit was so last minute it was the last thing on her mind. She brought it, not only to capture backstage shenanigans but to finally get the pictures she wanted of Rook in his element. After showing them around the next day, Colson got a good look at them and asked her to come on tour with them to do a few shows.

Jersey decided to skip every other show, not only to give her a break from the madness, not fully realizing what she had gotten herself into, but she often found herself needing the 3 uninterrupted hours to edit the thousands of pictures she ended up taking. As she finished the last few pictures from the show in Tokyo, she felt the vibrations of music fade away. Pulling out an earbud, she heard Colson’s final goodbye to the crowd and smirked. When she heard they were going to be at the Leeds and Reading Festivals, Jersey was determined to only work during the Leeds show, while Colson performed, then join everyone afterward. She took a few minutes to put everything away; Her camera and cords, along with her laptop, stowing them in her bunk, before grabbing an old looking book and opened it. It was a false book and was filled with all possible manner of marijuana; Edibles, cartridges, joints, flower, and rolling papers. She grabbed a small baggie of gummies, two joints, and a lighter before flipping the book shut and putting it back.

She hurried out of the bus, jumping down the steps and waving to their bus driver, who sat out in the sun while she worked. She pulled her VIP badge out from her back pocket and put the lanyard around her neck as she approached the security gate. Though she had been there earlier in the day and the guards all knew who she was with, she still flashed them the badge as she strolled through, tossing them a sweet smile. Jersey weaved through the tents until she heard a sudden and wild Rook scream. Her head whipped around just as her cousin came tumbling into view, closely followed by Colson, laughing. Rolling her emerald eyes and tossing her dark hair over her shoulder, Jersey turned and headed for the group as they made their way through the crowd toward her.

“Oi! You fuckers better not be having fun without me.” She called, once they were in earshot. Rook turned, quickly, and smiled, chasing down his cousin to scoop her up in a hug.

“There you are! It’s about time.” Rook said, setting her down and kissing her cheek.

“Hey, the guy doesn’t pay me to not work,” Jersey said, breaking away from Rook to give Colson a quick hug before moving onto the others. Colson shrugged, looking at Rook and said, “It’s true.” He laughed and hooked an arm around Rook’s neck once he got close, rubbing his knuckles on the top of his head.

“Get off, fucker!” Rook yelled, shoving his friend away while he laughed.

“Hey, Picture Girl. About time you joined us.” Slim said, putting an arm around her to give her a side hug. “I thought you were gonna stay on the bus.”

“Nah, just until I finished the pictures,” Jersey said. Slim chuckled and nodded as he said, “Aight. How they look?”

“Not to toot my own horn, but... Guys? They’re kind of fucking amazing, okay? I’ve got a gift.” Jersey said in a fake Valley Girl voice. The guys laughed and continued along to their tent. Jersey sat next to Rook, leaning against him, and handed him one of the joints she brought, along with the lighter. Rook took it without question and lit it. As she tucked her feet under her, she opened the baggie of gummies and popped one in her mouth before passing it to Colson as he walked past. He looked through it before passing it down to Baze, who immediately popped two into his mouth, and Colson took the joint from Rook, taking a toke.

“Fuck yeah, man. Whose joint is this?” Colson asked, looking around at his group. Jersey smirked at him. Colson smirked and pointed at her, briefly. “Hell yeah, Sav. Come through. James send you some stuff from California?”

“Of course. But this is the stuff I got from Rosie out in Nevada, last time she visited her family.” Jersey said. Colson made a funny face and laughed as he took one more puff before passing it to the next person.

~

The next 7 hours went by like a blur of smoke, laughing, music, and food. Within the last half hour or so Jersey sobered up enough to lead her drunken herd back to the bus so they could make their way down to Reading for the next show. Once they cleared the gate and the rest of Colson’s crew, that wasn’t intoxicated, had them, Jersey skipped over to the bus and hopped on. She only had a few minutes before chaos boarded the bus again, as she knew the guys would take a while, sobering a little too much for their liking and needing a minute.

She hurried to her bunk and grabbed her stash, then went to the table, setting herself up, to roll a few extra joints with the kief she had left. By this point in the tour, Jersey had their routine down pat: By the time they all clamored onto the bus, Jersey had a joint or two lit, ready to be passed around. She had, by now, become more than just their photographer, supplying them with their first round of whatever drink each man asked for just so they could settle into relaxing a little quicker. Just as Jersey rolled the last blunt, she lit it as the doors opened and the drunk buzz of conversation climbed onto the bus. She smiled as Rook came to sit with her, going through her stash.

“Yes, Rook. Go ahead and take what you want.” Jersey teased, blowing smoke in his face. Rook snickered as he popped two gummies into his mouth with a wink.

“Thanks, cuz.” Rook said, quickly leaving the booth. Jersey shook her head as Colson entered the bus. He made a beeline for Jersey and the outstretched hand that offered the joint.

“Fuck, we need you here full time,” Colson smirked, taking a toke before passing it on.

“You think that now. We’re only 5 shows deep, babe.” Jersey laughed as she packed up the box, leaving two joints up for grabs. Colson chuckled and sat on the couch as Jersey stowed her stash back in her bunk before coming out and asking for drink requests.

Ever the hostess, even when she was a guest on the tour, she was a grateful one. Jersey made use of the one semester of bartending classes and slung drinks across the bus. Once each man had a drink in their hand, she went to sit next to Colson, who just got passed the joint. She waited until he took a hit, then plucked it from between his fingers and took a toke herself.

“Hey, so how was the show?” Jersey asked the room, it only just having occurred to her she never asked earlier. As she tried to decipher the loud, excited, and numerous answers, she shook her head and curled into Colson’s side, passing him the joint. “So, how was the show?”

This time, she directed the question to Colson, who put an arm around her with a chuckle, inhaling deeply before passing the joint.

“It was good. Dom was there. He came out for ‘I Think I’m Okay’. You just missed him when we found you. You should have come to this show, Savie.” Colson said. Jersey tried to hide the blush at the use of the childhood nickname he adopted from Rook. It was one that Papa Cap, Rook’s father, Johnny, gave her- ‘Savage’. Shifting in her spot, Jersey shrugged and said, “He’ll be in Reading on Sunday, right?”

“Yeah, that’s true. Hope it’s the same energy, though.” Colson said with a chuckle, smirking down at her. Jersey gave him a look.

“They always have energy, Kells.” She teased, making Colson smirk.

“Baze, man, move your fuckin’ feet, you fuckin’ ogre!” Rook said, kicking at the feet that were propping Baze up between both couches. Baze smirked and said, “Man, go sit somewhere else.”

“I want to sit next to my cousin, bitch! Move!” Rook shouted with a smirk. Jersey practically crawled into Colson’s lap, sensing the impending fight between Baze and Rook.

“So, fuckin’ kick Kells off the couch, punk-ass bitch.” Baze shot back with a smirk. Rook swiped at him and Baze lazily dodged the playful punch.

“Don’t bring me into this, Baze,” Colson warned, his lips twisting up.

“Stay the fuck out of it, Colson! Punk.” Rook shot as he snickered. Colson smirked and threw his empty Solo cup at him. “Don’t fuck with me, Baker!”

“Come at me, bro. Nah, fuckin’ come at me, Rook. I dare you.” Colson said. Colson had Jersey’s legs draped over his lap and she was tucked under his arm, as her new high began to set in.

“Dooooon’t…” Jersey whined, softly. Colson tightened his arm around her as he grabbed the pillow next to him and started swinging at him. Jersey kept protesting, though her voice was drowned out by Rook and Colson yelling over each other.

Finally, getting a little too rowdy, not to mention the fact that Rook took four straight shots of vodka before the bus even took off after taking the two gummies, he stumbled while trying to rip the pillow from Colson. Jersey shrieked as Rook’s too topped off drink tipped a little too far. The contents of his cup spilled all over her, drenching her hair completely.

A brief hush fell on the bus, then Colson scooped her up as he stood, setting her on her feet. “Shit. Jersey, are you okay?” Colson asked. Jersey pushed his hands away and tossed her alcohol-soaked locks over her shoulder and grabbed at Rook, punching his shoulder.

“Fuck, Rook! What the fuck?!” She cried. Baze quickly stood and shuffled to the side as she shoved Rook aside, hauling ass through the divider to their bunks and into the bathroom. Back in the front of the bus, AJ and Slim had begun to mop up the mess as Rook stumbled to the booth and sat down.

“Fuck.” He muttered, softly. Colson sighed and patted his shoulder as he made his way to check on Jersey. Closing the divider behind him to give them a little more privacy, he leaned next to the bathroom door and folded his arms. He waited a while longer before he knocked softly.

“Fuck off, Rook!” Jersey spat. Colson snickered and said, “Do you think he’s dumb enough to come back here? Fuck; You think he’s brave enough?”

Colson heard a soft sigh, then the sound of the locks unlatching and the door opened, slightly. The glare from her burning green eyes all he saw, she said, “What?” The word came out a little harsher than Jersey intended. Colson leaned over a little more to look at her, raising an eyebrow at her. Jersey sighed and opened the door fully, tightening the towel around her chest as she gave him a look as well.

Colson bit his lip, trying not to snicker. In a fit, Jersey rubbed a towel over her face to get the drink off her face, and in her haste to get away from everyone, she momentarily forgot she was wearing makeup. Her eyes were rubbed black and her cheeks were red and stained with makeup streaked tears and droplets of the spilled drink.

“Want me to wait for you?” He offered. Jersey shook her head and said, “Just bring me shorts and a tank top.”

“Ooh-hoo. No panties? Naughty girl.” Colson teased. Jersey shot him a look and said, “Is this the time for jokes?”

“Sorry,” Colson said softly with a snicker, turning to go to her bunk and pull out her bag to rummage through it. Finding what she requested, he put the bag back and sauntered back over to Jersey, handing her the clothes. Jersey took them and gave him a soft ‘Thanks’, then gave him a once over before she finally broke a smile and said, “Did you really think I was going to let you rummage through my panties?”

Colson laughed, softly, as she shut the door. He sighed and waited until he heard the shower start to run, before going back to her bunk, letting his legs hang over the side and laid back on the mattress, pulling out his phone. Half an hour later, the shower turned off and Colson watched the door, listening to the rustling as Jersey dried off and changed. Just as Colson went back to his phone, the door opened and she finally emerged, dragging a comb through her hair.

“Really? Why my bunk?” She asked, hitting his knee with her comb. Colson chuckled and sat up, making room for her to climb in next to him. Turning to her, both Colson and Jersey ended up facing each other, sitting crisscross. Jersey broke again and let out a soft giggle and shook her head. She glanced away from him, looking out the window, and finished combing her hair.

Colson leaned his head back against the wall and watched Jersey as she massaged a dollop of Biosilk into her damp hair. He kicked out a foot to nudge her and said, “Hey. You okay?”

Jersey looked at him and gave a shrug, grabbing one of her pillows and wrapping her arms around it. “I’ll beat his ass later...I mean...I’ll be fine.” She said with a light smile. The corners of Colson’s mouth lifted up a little higher, glad she was able to joke about it.

“Hey. Come here.” Shifting over and closing the small sliding door of her bunk to lean against it, Colson held out a hand to her. Jersey smiled and propped up her pillows to make them both comfortable as she shifted to lean against him. Jersey pushed open the curtains to watch the Leeds skyline pass by and Colson shifted to prop up his right leg, resting his arm on his knee. His other arm was wrapped around Jersey’s waist, comfortably resting his hand on her right thigh. As Jersey rested her head on his chest, her hands covered his and she felt a soft kiss on her temple. With a bigger smile, still watching the lights pass by, Jersey said, “Thanks, Colson. You always find a way to make me feel better.”

After kissing her temple, Colson pressed his lips against her hair, lightly. When she thanked him, Colson smiled and said, “I try.”

Jersey giggled softly before a hush fell on them, if only for a brief moment. For the next 3 hours, as they drove from Leeds to Reading, Jersey and Colson talked quietly to one another about every random thing they could think of. Just before the got to the hotel, once they finally pulled into Reading, Colson and Jersey both emerged to the front.

All conversation quieted as everyone kept an eye on Jersey and Rook, Rook’s smile slowly fading as he looked up at his cousin. It was an awkward silence until Colson yelled, “Skrrt! Make yourself scarce!”

Jersey rolled her eyes as the boys all scrambled over each other and back to their bunks to give them some time alone to talk. Jersey chuckled as she made her way over to the booth and sat across from him. Reaching for the last untouched joint, Rook handed her a lighter. Jersey lit it and took a hit, then sat back, watching her cousin.

Cracking a smile, she said, “You do that shit again, John Paul, and I swear to God, I will beat you with your own drumsticks.”

Rook smirked and said, “I love you too, Savie.” Jersey smirked and watched him as he stood, standing when he came to her. The pair hugged and Rook kissed her cheek, saying, “I’m sorry, Jersey.”

“Aww!!” Jersey grabbed a pillow from the couch and turned to the boys, but Colson rushed her, catching her waist and scooping her up to carry her to the couch as the others bum-rushed Rook. Jersey cried out as Colson kept her pinned down, hollering at his boys to get Rook. Jersey shoved Colson off and shouted, “Get fucking bent!”

Rook managed to wiggle his way out of the huddle and over to the couches. Colson punched Rook’s shoulder as he passed him. The cousins settled as everyone else fell back into their usual last-minute shenanigans for the last half hour of the drive.

~

Once they pulled up to the hotel, they all clamored out of the bus, dying for some real beds and comfort. Checking into their suite, they all claimed beds, AJ and Rook fighting for the last window spot. Once the bed situation was solved, they bust out one last bottle of alcohol and had a little more fun.

Music played as they got into their usual shenanigans. Jersey sat with Baze and AJ as they talked amongst themselves, trying to ignore Colson and Rook as they tore around the place. Around 4 in the morning, Jersey tapped out and went to the other room, pulling the blinds shut and snuggling into the blankets, scrolling through her phone for a while longer. The door opened as she set her phone down, ready to go to sleep. She looked over as AJ walked in and over to his bags that sat on the bed he would share with Rook.

“Going to bed?” She teased, snuggling to get comfortable with a smirk.

“Nah. The Energizer Bunny twins out there are still going.” AJ chuckled, rummaging through his bag. He glanced at Jersey then to the door and said, “Hey. So, what’s going on with you and Colson, anyway?”

Jersey turned over and sat up a little more and said, “Going on? What are you talking about?”

AJ stopped and raised an eyebrow with a chuckle. “Well, after tonight...I mean, dude was gone for 3 hours. Y’all were in the bunks when he could have been out with us partying.” AJ said. Jersey pursed her lips slightly and said, “I mean, he was comforting me…”

AJ chuckled and sat on the end of her bed. “Nah, Sav, nah. I get that. We all do. Shit, Rook felt so bad he stopped drinking and smoking, till you came back out.” AJ said. Jersey added her own, “Not that he didn’t have enough shit in his system.”

AJ snickered and nodded his head a little, then said, “True. But I mean, when have you known Colson to voluntarily skip partying on the bus?”

Rook and Jersey had always been close, so when he joined up as Machine Gun Kelly’s drummer, she started hanging out with them when they were home in Ohio the same time she was or if they came through New Jersey. Because of this, she had gotten to know the guys a lot over the years. Thinking back, AJ was right. Unless it was an important reason or an emergency, Colson never missed a chance to party. With a shrug Jersey replied, as she laid back down, “Maybe he just felt really bad? I dunno. You’d have to ask him.”

AJ chuckled and patted her leg as he stood. “Aight, Save. Whatever you say, baby. Get some rest. We want you bright-eyed and bushy-tailed at the show.” He teased. Jersey waved at him, getting comfortable again, and offered a soft, ‘Night. Have fun.’ Followed by a louder, “Don’t let those idiots kill themselves...Or each other!”

AJ tossed his head back and laughed as he closed the door. Jersey giggled and closed her eyes, drifting to sleep. If only for a few hours. When Colson, AJ, and Rook finally stumbled in, 2 hours later, Jersey let out a soft whimper at the disturbance and shifted under the blankets. Colson shifted Rook’s arm on his shoulder, trying to stand him up.

“You got him?” Colson whispered, taking Rook’s arm from around his neck as AJ took the weight in response and veered toward their bed, dragging the drunken drummer along with him. Rook suddenly started babbling, incoherent and loud. AJ swore under his breath and clamped a hand over his mouth and shushed him. Colson chuckled and shook his head as he tugged his shirt off and wiggled out of his pants.

“Shut the fuck up, Rook,” Jersey muttered, sleepily. Rook giggled and retorted back, “Why don’t you fuck the up shut...Wait...No, shut-”

“Goodnight, John Paul,” Jersey said, a little louder. Rook giggled as he slumped back on the bed. AJ took off his shoes and lifted his legs onto the bed. As Rook continued babbling in his drunk state and AJ quietly asked him to please shut the fuck up and go to sleep, Colson got in bed, slipping in next to Jersey.

“Y’all are fucking annoying. I get my own room next time.” She muttered, turning away from Rook and moving toward the sudden warmth with a shiver.

“You can stay in my room on the bus? Oof!” Colson offered, half teasing, but still earning a slap to his bare chest once Jersey reached him. She snuggled into his side and almost immediately fell back asleep. Colson chuckled and eased an arm around her and shifting to get comfortable, then drifted off to sleep.

~

The sudden, loud sound of the curtains being torn open woke Jersey and Colson with a start. Colson groaned and crossed his hands in front of his face, glancing down when he felt pressure and movement when he moved. He curled an arm around Jersey as she whimpered and pushed her face into Colson’s neck, trying to hide from the brightness.

Rook turned at the groans and smirked, “Well, good morning. Aren’t we cozy?”

“Fuck. Off. Rook.” Jersey said, her words muffled by Colson’s neck. Colson chuckled and glanced at her again, resting a hand on her arm as he gave her a quick squeeze before getting up. Jersey whined softly and slowly picked her way out of the sheets, yawning.

“Fuck, what time is it?” Colson asked, stretching with a yawn.

“Noon. We want to hit the pool. You guys down?” Slim said from the doorway, sipping his coffee. Colson shrugged as he scratched his head with a tired smile and said, “Shit. Sure. Why not?”

“Fuck. 12 O’clock? How long have you guys been up?” Jersey asked, reaching for her phone to scroll through her notifications, answering a few texts.

“Not long. We all slept the fuck in.” Slim said, laughing, along with Colson and Rook. Jersey locked her phone and looked up at Slim, taking a minute for the conversation to register before she giggled and smirked.

“Well, thank God for that.” She teased. Slim chuckled and caught Colson’s attention to start a conversation, allowing Rook to take his moment and slunk up to his cousin. “Cuddling up to Colson, I see?” He teased, lowering his voice as he sauntered up to her. Jersey gave him a look. He snickered and scooped up his bag to dig around for his swim trunks.

“Shut up, JP. Have you been talking to AJ? I’m gonna fuck him up if he’s-” Rook shushed her, gently, as he took a step closer and said, “Hey. Jers, what are you talking about?”

Jersey sighed and shook her head, moving his hands away. “Nothing. Nevermind. Don’t-Don’t say anything, Rookie, okay?” Jersey said, making her way to her bag. Rook shook his head and chuckled as he went to the bathroom to change. Jersey rummaged around in her bag before she gave a soft groan.

“What’s wrong?” Slim asked, still hanging out in the doorway. Jersey sighed and said, “I think I left my suits in my other bag on the bus. Fuuuck, I don’t want to deal with that…”

She pulled out a pair of leggings and a tank top, concealing a pretty pink and blue lace bra and panties. “You wanna hit the store?” Colson asked, with a laugh. When both Slim and Jersey looked at him, Jersey giving him a look, Colson said, “I fucking lost my trunks, bro. I must have left them in fucking Indonesia.”

Colson and Slim laughed as Jersey shook her head and smirked. “How do you lose those, Colson? They’re swim trunks.” She teased. Colson flipped her off as he grabbed a change of clothes.

“So, do you want to go get a new suit?” Colson asked as she passed by, spying Rook as he walked out of the bathroom. Stopping in the doorway, she skewed her lips in thought. Finally, she looked at him, cracking a small smile and said, “Yeah. Sure. Why not? Maybe I’ll find something cute.”

Colson shot her a thumbs up and a smirk as Jersey giggled and closed the bathroom door. Slim waited until Rook walked out, before stepping more into the room and giving a chuckle as he said, “Kells. Could you want her more? God damn, bro.”

Colson gave him a look. “The fuck are you talking about, bro? Want her? It’s Savage.” He said, pulling on his jeans. Slim gave him an unamused look.

“Man, are you for real?” Slim scoffed. Colson rolled his eyes as he pulled on his shirt and grabbed his deodorant and slipping it under his shirt to apply it. “Y’all are always cuddling and shit. Acting like y’all are in a relationship You like her, man.” Slim added another chuckle as he took another sip of coffee.

“Dude. She’s not my type.” Colson retorted.

“What? Hot?” Slim shot.

“A friend?” Colson shot back. “And she’s Rook’s cousin. It would be weird.”

“Bruh, he jokes about it as much as we do, Kells!” Slim laughed, shaking his head.

“Slim, if I actually started dating her, Rook would lose his shit. He jokes, but, like, if it happened? You’re telling me he wouldn’t be mad?” Colson asked, giving him a look.

“Who would get mad? About what?” Jersey asked, walking out of the bathroom and to her bag. The men exchanged glances as Jersey grabbed a hair tie and stuffed her wild hair into a messy bun. She looked between them, waiting for an answer, to which both men mumbled and looked away. Colson sat on the bed, tugging on his socks, and Slim shoved his coffee cup in his face and he turned and left the room.

Jersey shook her head and chuckled, dropping her sandals on the floor and slipped her feet into them. Grabbing her phone and wallet, slipping them both into the pocket on her thigh, she chirped, “Ready?”

Colson glanced at her and smirked. “Yeah. Let’s go.” He said, also grabbing his phone and wallet, the both of them heading for the door.

~

Next Chapter

~

Hope you guys liked it. If you want to be added to my taglist for this and/or future MGK/Colson stories, let me know! If you have any comments, feel free! 

@badwolf-in-the-impala​ @lovemythsworld​ @kellsfanficalltogether​ @mgkobsessed​

[classlesstulip]

So, You Called for a Handyman?

(A little medly of a day in the life of a ‘handyman’ in the mob. One who doesn’t really take his job too seriously.)

     “*che,* a tall and shadowed figure snorted as he flicked the long blade he held. The wet, viscous sound of blood flying through the air and splattering onto concrete was heard, the whistle of metal short but sharp.  

     Tiberius looked around the room he was in, sharp ears pricked, listening for any of the tell-tale sounds of life: breathing, twitches, the shuddering gasps one gives when in great pain. He was only satisfied when he heard nothing from the collection of bodies spilled around him.

     'There’s a group of Mick’s boys over on 8th and North. Go and fix them.’

Heh, they’re fixed now, alright, Ty thought. Now he just needs to call in Lenore for disposal; he needs to pass over that new fertilizer recipe he’s got, using these mooks may be just what her flowers need.

*****

     Storing his machete in one of the many caches secreted in Sepulveda territory, Ty swapped out his fingerless leather gloves for a new set. A quick check showed that even after all these years he’s still got it; not even one drop of blood on his 3-piece.

     If even ONE of those mooks had spilled on his Armani, he would have rioted. This suite was a gift!

     His internal rant was cut off when his phone chirped. Pulling it out of an inner pocket, he saw a new text from Little Cruzi: seem’s their Apa is done putting up with Jericho. Needs to have the jackass fixed. And-, oh!

     'Apa says make it messy. The wetter the better.’

     Ty can do that. He’s pretty good at getting things wet.

     Oh, that was a good one! He’ll have to try that one on Val; the poor dear’s been wound up tighter than a spring the last few weeks. A good laugh followed by a good fuck should fix that.

*****

     "Hey, Ty? Boss has a new stop for ya!”

     What the fuck? Seriously!? "Uh, Amber? Ya can see I’m currently up to my elbows right now, yeah!?“ The wet squelch and Ty’s grunt as he pulled on Jericho’s lungs rung through the warehouse. It was dark and dusty; the perfect backdrop for a Splash-n-Dash.

     Currently, Ty was bent over a stack of pallets, the beaten corpse of Jericho splayed across them. Scattered on the walls and floors around them were gouges and bullet marks, with streaks of blood interspersed, belying that a scuffle had taken place, the loser of which had his chest cracked open and Ty cleaning the innards like he was preparing a chicken to get roasted over open coals.

     The driver held up their arms, shrugging. "Hey man, I’m just the messenger. Turns out, Jericho was fucking with not just the Sepulveda’s, but the Alnazar’s AND Satrinava’s.” Amber looked a little green at the sound of flesh and ligaments ripping as Ty finished his impromptu vivisection. He went even more green when Ty overhand-hurled his double-handful of offal at one of the far walls with a loud 'YEET!’, the wet splat and fanning of blood from the impact causing Amber to jump back with a heave. “Dude, what the fuck!?” The thick gurgle he swallowed back after his outburst showed just how DONE he was with Ty’s nastiness.

     “Hey, Val says wet and messy, I deliver wet an’ messy! Now keep your pants on and drag over my duffle. My shirt is ruined.”

     Keeping an eye on a blood-soaked Tiberius, Amber did as bid. It took him a few minutes to locate said bag, during which Ty lit-up a cig.

     “Move it, cupcake.”

     “Alright, alright, jeez. Go fuck yourself, asshole.”

     “I HEARD THAT!”

*****

     “Alrighty then,” Ty propped his feet up on the desk in front of him, ignoring the glare Asra shot him. “So, we gots a case of ol’ Jerry boy putting his fingers into too many pies, both literal, figurative, and colloquially. Drugs, rent girls, and laundering, right?” He pulled in a big drag from his cigar, having lighted up the moment he entered Fluff'n'Stuff’s digs.

     With a grunt, Asra pushed the big booted feet off of his NICE mahogany desk. Getting a few smoke-rings blown at him in retribution, he glared at the 'handyman’ sitting across from him, but knew any more fussing on his end would be futile; the only reason Asra isn’t currently a smear on the wall is that Ty thinks he’s adorable AND they go way back.

     That and Val and Asra once had a Thing, but that’s none of his business.

     “Yes,” leaning back, Asra pulled out a thick manila file folder and dropped it onto his desk. The poor thing was only kept together by a single rubber band, and Ty’s surprised it hasn’t snapped already. “These are the places that Jericho’s Number Two and Three have holed up. Taking these two out will cause the whole operation to fall apart.”

     As Asra was speaking, Ty secured his cigar between his molars, propping his jaw open as his fingers started pulling apart the file. Flipping through the first few cover papers, he soon got to the meat and potatoes of the lot. “As you can see, Vinny is in the heart of the Garment District…” Ty stopped paying attention as he looked through everything, Asra’s voice becoming a low, soothing drone. He leaned back in his chair, holding up a few A4-sized photos.

     “Now, Illian was able to-” Asra was cut off at a loud, 'interested’ hum from Tiberius. Seconds later, the handyman turned the papers in his hand’s landscape, and a few sheets accordioned down. A slightly lewd chuckle floated up from behind the papers before Asra snatched at them, Ty letting out a disappointed 'awww’ at the loss of his smut.

     “A-HEM!” Crinkling the purloined pornography in his fist, Asra pinned Ty with A Look. “This is no time to be looking at, at, uh,” he peeped at the rag, “PLAYBOY!”

     “Azzy? That was IN the file. I had nothing to do wi-”

     “REGARDLESS,” tossing the magazine at his wastebin (and making a mental note to speak to his son about leaving his 'reading material’ out and about), Asra huffed. “Just, get out of here and fix 'em. Oh, and…”, rifling through his desk, he pulled out a box. He pushed it across his table, a curious Ty picking it up gingerly, “wear this. We need proof of the job, to be a warning.”

     “A body cam? Shit son, y'all mean business.” Snorting, Ty threw himself out of his chair, tossing the little box in the air before catching it and slipping it into his suitcoat pocket. “Got it. The usual fee to the usual account. Give hugs and kisses to yer fam for me, yeah?”

*****

     Walking down a softly carpeted hall, a slight shadow was seen. Soft curls were piled atop their head, and one hand held a glass of wine while the other pulled their robe tighter. Light filtered through shuttered blinds, car head beams and static lamps fighting the darkness of night. Occasionally, the honk of a horn or the revving of an engine sounded out, despite being muffled by layers of brick and insulation.

     Sipping their wine, they stopped just outside a cracked door. Peeping in, a soft smile curled their lips as they spied one of their little ones (though, being nearly twenty, they are fairly certain that Sol would object to such an endearment). Seeing them softly snoring away, the door was pulled shut. Checking on their other child, Cruz, showed the same result.

     Once satisfied that their children (grown though they may be) were tucked away safely snoozing, Val continued down the hall. A few twists and turns later and they were in their office. Opulently decorated with heavy dark wood pieces and bold colors, it was quite a large and stately room. Near the far wall was their desk, and on the blotter was a thumb drive.

     Knowing that it must have been left by Tiberius, Val plucked it up. Wandering towards the entertainment center, they plugged in the drive, turned on the screen, and got comfortable on the couch, sipping more wine as they navigated menus with the remote.

     “Hey, is this thing on?” The sound of someone tapping a mic was heard before the picture abruptly turned on. A large brown eye was center stage, the corners crinkling briefly before the cam was pulled back, revealing the familiar face of Tiberius. “Alrighty, then! So, the usual drivel: Tiberius working on behalf of Don Valentino of the Sepulveda Family, yadda yadda yadda,” Ty’s eyes rolled, and his body moved like he was waving his hand. “Here to fuck some shit up and make a statement. So here’s,” he tapped the screen, “the mutherfuckin’,” more taps, “TEA,” a final tap. “Vinny’s been baaaaaaaad. Not only,” Ty brandished a finger, waving it around his head like a conductor, “has this bonafide dickfuck fuckface been doin’ Jerry’s dirty work, but this FUCKER has also been bringing in kids. KIDS I TELL YA! Now c'mon, Vinny, baby, ya don’t bring kids into your prostitution ring! Fucker! So, time to clean house! And Val?” Ty winked at the camera, “I’ll have a nice little pressie for ya when you finish this!”

     Some fumbling and cursing later, and Val had a chest-high view of whatever was in front of Ty. Currently, it was the door to what may be a warehouse. The video jumped up and down a few times, and the cocking of a gun was heard. Something very familiar was playing in the background, and it came to a hard beat as Ty kicked in the door-

     “Some-BODY ONCE TOLD ME,” duel-wielding, Ty buried a bullet into the head and gut of the bouncer standing guard as the kicked-in door bounced off of the wall. “THE WORLD WAS GONNA ROLL ME,” two steps down the hallway. “I AIN��T THE SMARTEST TOOL IN THE SHED,” one guy burst out of a room and got pistol-whipped for his stupidity, getting a few slugs to the back as he fell.

Hopping over the new body, Ty continued his song. “SHE WAS LOOKIN’ KINDA DUMB WITH HER FINGER AND HER THUMB,” this time, he peeped around a doorway into a room, squeaking out a startled 'Errol!?’ as a knife buried itself into the wall behind him. A feminine voice started spewing curses as he backpedaled, hands still clutching Glocks up in the air. “Aight, aight, I got it! Sheesh!” Huffing, he continued his journey down the hall, bellowing an 'IN THE SHAPE OF AN L ON 'ER FOREHEAD!’ behind him as he went.

Now Val wants to know what she was doing there. Did Jericho piss off Lucio, as well? They jumped as Ty continued his bit of Musical Mayhem.

     “WELLLLLLLLL THE YEARS START COMIN’ AND THEY DON’T STOP COMING!” At some point, the handyman had swapped out his handguns for a combat shotgun, opening up rounds into the chests of three forgettable thugs in beat to the last three words of his stanza. “FED TO THE RULES AND I HIT THE GROUND RUNNIN’!” Coming to the end of the hall, Ty blasted through the door, revealing the large, empty space typical to warehouses was replaced with a sort of hotel-like setup. An open-air lobby, with staircases spiraling up, leading to floors with open walkways. It looked like someone tried to recreate the lobby of the Waldorf Astoria, but it just went up and up, with each floor being closer to a balcony than a full floor. All of the open space allowed for the panicked cries and screams of the brothel inhabitants to echo in upon themselves.

     There were also a LOT of fine rugs, marble, and gilt furniture. How long has this operation been going on, and how did fucking JERICHO of all people get this set-up on the DL?

     “DIDN’T MAKE SENSE NOT TO LIVE FOR FUN,” *boom!**boom!**boom!*; a rapid release of shots into a group of mobsters as they tried to rush Tiberius, giving Val a front-row seat to the amount of kick a combat-class shotgun has as one man went flying, streamers of blood shooting from the stump that used to hold his head. “YOUR BRAIN GETS SMART BUT YER HEAD GETS DUMB! HAHA, FUCKER!” Ty’s voice was starting to get difficult to hear over the amount of sheer NOISE in the background.

     “SO MUCH TO DO!” *blam!* “SO MUCH TO SEE!” *blamblam!* “SO WHAT’S WRONG WITH TAKIN’ THE BACKSTREETS!?” The bodycam started shaking at Ty charged over to a staircase, plowing shoulder-first into a group of people storming down it while waving their guns. The picture blacked out and the muffled scratch of fabric rubbing over the built-in mic took up a few seconds of footage before a bright light cut through. Val had to squint their own eyes, and everything came back into focus just in time to see Ty hurl a middle-aged, half-dressed wanna-be mafioso over one of the balcony floors, singing out 'YOU’LL NEVER KNOW! IF YOU DON’T GO!’ as the man plummeted. He landed with a rubbery thump.

     “YOU’LL NEVER SHINE IF YOU DON’T GLOW,” more singing/screeching from Ty as he tossed a grenade down another balcony/hall. As it erupted, it covered the huddled gangsters in liquid fire. “HEY NOW! YOU’RE AN ALL-STAR! GET YOUR GAME ON! GO PLAYEEEEE! C'MON ASSHOLES! YOU WANTED TO BE A ROCKSTAR! HOW NOW! YOU’RE A ROCK STAR! GET THE SHOW ON! GET PAIIIIIIIIIIID! HA HAHAHAAA!”

     Val made a quiet note to themselves that Ty, while very funny, can also be downright sinister.

     “AND ALL THAT GLITTERS IS GO~OOOLLLLLLD!” And that Ty should also never attempt a falsetto that high ever. AGAIN.

     “ONLY SHOOTING STAAAAAAAAAARS BREAK THE MO-OLLLLLLD!” Another flame-spewing grenade was thrown, this time hitting what looked to be a fire extinguisher. Seconds later, foam started jetting out of the damaged, high-pressure steel canister, turning what was once a life-saving device into a literal missile, which shot off and plowed into the chest of a woman in Jericho’s colors, launching her airborne before the canister exploded, spreading shrapnel and viscera into a mist.

     Smothering their face with their hand, Val let out a disbelieving laugh as Ty continued to wreak unholy havoc on the hideout to the tune of an upbeat, mid-aughties pop-rock song. Knives were thrown, bullets buried in brains, and it all came to a crescendo as Ty unloaded a stereotypical tommy-gun down into a group of wannabe gangsters that had jimmied themselves into the lobby. The last note to the song was capped off with a tossed Molotov, the ring of shattering glass pairing well to the last guitar chord.

     Chuckling in satisfaction, Val finished their wine before shutting off the television. Wandering out of their office, they refilled their wineglass before heading toward their bedroom. Humming in pleasure after taking a fresh sip of chilled wine, they gently opened their door, stopping in the doorway before raising a sculpted brow. “So,” they queried. “Is this my 'pressie’?”

     It’s quite a nice present, Val thought. Tiberius was lounging on Val’s obscenely large bed, on his side and completely nude. If not for a strategically-placed pile of rose petals, the fit man would be putting on quite the show. As it was, Tiberius decided to take a page out of every cheesy romance novel/movie and had bedecked the bedroom in dozens of low-burning candles and scattered roses, capping-off the trope with a single rose clenched between pearly whites. It’s something the Valentino of twenty-some years ago would have swooned over.

     Although, the Valentino of now is feeling quite swoon-y, now. "Heh,“ they chuckled as Ty wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. "I’ve got to say, this is a nice surprise, viejo amigo.” Quietly shutting the door behind them, they leaned against the slab of wood-encased steel and gave their 'present’ a heated stare. “What gives?”

     “Eh, nothing much.” Pulling the rose out of his mouth, Ty tossed it aside with a flick of the wrist. “Just, ah, you wanted a job wet and messy, and I decided that you could use a little 'wet 'n messy’ yourself.”

     Val barked out a laugh. “Oh, but that was horrible!” Wandering closer to the bed, they held out a hand, gently cupping a warm cheek. “What am I going to do with you- MERDA!”

     Yanking Val towards him, Ty rolled them, stopping on his back with Val perched on top. “Well, first things first! Let’s fuck!”

*****

     The room stunk of sex, and all of the candles had burned themselves out. Entwined under a thin sheet, a sticky but satiated couple cuddled. Bite marks and hickeys decorated soft skin, and Val laid with their head tucked under Ty’s chin, one set of fingers lazily tracing circles over the larger man’s lower back.

“So,” Val lazily purred. “Aside from the cam footage, did you learn anything else?”

Ty hummed. “You may want to speak to Head in the Clouds.”

“…about?”

     A hoarse chuckle. “Seem’s someone’s son has a little crush on our Cruzi. A Playboy got mixed into my briefing file, and a VERY well-worn page had a model that looked startlingly like our bambino was on it.”

     “…really?” Ty hissed as sharp nails dug into his back, relaxing when Val apologetically rubbed them. “I’ll need to set-up a meeting. But, that can wait until tomorrow.”

     The last thing Ty thought as they both dropped off to sleep was that he was glad he didn’t let on that he’s pretty sure Lucky and Cruz have a thing.

     But he’s not sorry for telling Cruz’s Apa. Serves the little brat right for shitting all over him as a baby and giving him heart attacks every week since they learned how to walk.

     HA!

@agent-darkbootie @thraxbaby @lazyvoyager @magicianapprenticelyra @plaguedcount

[arigatouiris]

revenge is a fool’s game // arthur morgan — [05]

pairing: arthur morgan x female!reader

word count: 3047

warnings: strong violence, mentions of period and blood; emotional distress, mentions of torture, rape and sexual abuse, explicit sexual references, a whole lotta angst, cowboy stuff;

notes: i try to update this regularly, but i can’t keep up omg. anyway, hope you like this chapter!!

not following a taglist for this, i can’t seem to keep track of people who ask so just check on my masterlist~

masterlist in bio~

Chapter Five: Taming Wild Horses, Taming Wild Hearts

○

(y/n) woke up to the sight of blood. It was an every month occurrence, but she was always unprepared, each time. She hoped and prayed she hadn’t stained into her pants, and a sigh of relief escaped her lips when she spotted that they were fine. However, the smell of blood washed over them, something she could hide by grabbing a few herbs on her way out.

It was still dark out, (y/n) was glad; she quickly grabbed the cheesecloth pouch from inside her bag and stuffed it with cotton. She shoved it onto her panty, and cushioned herself. A wave of nausea hit her from the smell, and she was sure that after everyone had slept that following night, she would definitely jump into the river and give herself a bath. She had cramp pains but she could brush it off as being moody; the best part was how she made everyone believe she couldn’t talk. This saved her the excuse of having to explain or deliver any sort of communication with anyone. She quickly tied the bandages around her chest and held a deep breath as she made the final knots. She was ready for the day.

Everyone had been way too easy on her ever since the two of them returned after the incident. John, on the other hand, barely paid her any attention. He’d address her as ‘him’ and ‘he’ now—an unspoken truce was called for. (y/n) understood this as some sort of positive sign, even though John glared at her like he wanted her to drop dead.

Arthur on the other hand, had been way too talkative with her the past few days. It had been close to a week since John and (y/n) came back after the incident, and ever since then, Arthur volunteered to go anywhere with (y/n) and greeted her every time he saw her. She didn’t see this as a sign of infatuation, she didn’t take Arthur to be one who was attracted to the same sex (not that there was anything wrong with it in her mind); however, it seemed almost cautious.

Arthur interacting with her this openly only gave her a few words that he may or may not want her to understand: I don’t trust you, his actions screamed.

She walked out of her tent that morning to spot Arthur near the coffee pot. After washing her face and mouth with water, (y/n) headed over there for some coffee. She knew that the more she avoided him, especially when “nothing was out of the ordinary”, the more Arthur would get suspicious. She had to play it cool and act like nothing was different. She knew Arthur didn’t trust her, but the more clueless she would act, she hoped he would get more lenient with her.

However, both of them knew something was off, even if they didn’t admit it to one another.

“Mornin’ Riley.” Arthur greeted her, in a straight tone.

(y/n) nodded once before setting herself down a few feet away from Arthur, and poured herself some coffee.

“Ya know,” Arthur began. “I always found it strange that John never took a likin’ to ya. He’s a friendly boy.”

(y/n) didn’t move a muscle. She turned to Arthur and observed his features. He looked young, but there was something undeniably sad about the way he carried himself. His dirty brown hair was strangely always neat, and he had a hidden sort of melancholy in his eyes. She almost got lost in starting at him, before he waved at her and grabbed her attention all over again.

“Somethin’ wrong, boy?” Arthur made sure to add ‘boy’ in the end. She could tell.

She shook her head before taking a sip of her coffee. The sun was out, but it was still way too early in the day. Her heart was almost at her throat and her mind was slowly starting to go blank. Arthur Morgan seemed to confuse the hell out of her, and he seemed to enjoy doing so.

“Mind tellin’ me what you thinkin’?” Arthur asked again, pressing her against a corner.

Doesn’t he know I can’t talk? (y/n) thought before sipping her coffee quietly. Her heart was raging against her chest, her feet were itching to start shaking out of nervousness, and her forehead was already drenched with sweat. She was good at keeping secrets, and Arthur was just as good in digging them out.

She then heard a sigh. She turned to see Arthur look her in the eye before getting up and walking away. Her stomach dropped with the thought of the look he gave her before he left, a look that perhaps hinted that he knew more than he was letting out on, a look that scared her more than John’s accusation. Arthur Morgan was no boy, he was a man whose words could be counted upon. Yet, here was no open declaration of her being a liar. There was no denial of her gender or her apparent secrecy.

Arthur Morgan was not even pressing her for answers, yet, this sort of hesitance in his nature of wanting to understand her, scared her. It made her uncomfortable to think that perhaps, Arthur Morgan knew she was a woman and chose to keep it a secret.

And since there was no reason why he would do so, or that she couldn’t think of any, the benefit of the doubt only fell on the fact that perhaps, Arthur Morgan, outlaw and self-proclaimed bad man, kept her secret because of the goodness of his heart. He did not understand her plight and chose not to dwell.

No, she thought before finishing her coffee. I’m overthinking.

○

“There’s a job in town,” Hosea began that noon. “We do this and we pack up. More people have caught our attention at town and it ain’t a good thing to stay and anger ‘em more.”

(y/n) looked down, before checking John’s reaction. The boy’s face was red with anger, but not at something external.

“Don’t worry, Riley, it ain’t yer doin’.” Dutch said, laughing. (y/n) blushed.

“What’s the job?” Arthur asked, smoking a cigarette.

“There’s this man, Donald Briggsman. He’s loaded, and apparently he’s goin’ around tellin’ the whole town that there’s a group o’ no good criminals waitin’ to rob 'em all. The only part that ain’t true of his story is that we ain’t gonna rob the town but him and only him.” Dutch said, with a determined look on his face.

“Turns out he’s good friends with Colm too,” Hosea said now looking at (y/n). “We anger him then we anger Colm, before he comes marchin’ right at us and demandin’ an explanation.”

(y/n)’s heart jumped. Too many things to digest, she thought before gulping.

“So what we do is this,” Hosea began once again. “Riley and Arthur’ll go to town this time and speak to the general shop owner there. Arthur’s gonna do the talkin’, while I want Riley to sneak in and get whatever you can get yer hands on that could be valuable. Make it as distinct as ya can. A day later, I’ll go in and deliver it to the general store owner, admitting to there bein’ a criminal group that ain’t no good.”

(y/n) understood the plot. It was basic, but it could work if it was executed well enough. Hosea will slowly slip out of being suspected for being part of the group, while the attention would fall on Riley and Arthur instead.

“And accordin’ to heresay, Donald’s eldest daughter’s birthday is in a week’s time. Only a select few are gonna be invited to this so here’s hopin’ that returning and being acquitted can have me invited!” Hosea laughed.

This plan can go wrong in so many ways, (y/n) thought, but chose not to say anything.

“And that’s the day we strike,” Dutch said, “It’s the day they least expect us to do anythin’. We’re gon’ rob ‘em, and we’re runnin’ away.”

“Where are we goin’?” Arthur asked, not sounding too intrigued.

“I know a place,” Dutch said, with a glint in his eye. “Don’t worry, Arthur. I’ve got a plan.”

And Arthur believed him.

“Riley, yer gonna need a horse, son.” Hosea said, seriously this time.

She nodded before pulling out her notebook. 

I’ll tame one today!

“Tame one?” Hosea asked, cocking an eyebrow at the young boy. Arthur chuckled before shaking his head and walking off.

“You have big dreams for them small hands, son,” Dutch said, laughing before patting Arthur on the back. “Arthur, go with him and make sure he don't die by the time ya’ll have to go to the general store.”

Arthur didn’t want to, but was curious to see how Riley would ‘tame’ a horse. Wild horses were not easy to tame, they’d trample over anyone who came close. Even Arthur couldn’t tame a wild horse, it was almost ten times easier to simply buy one. Then again, Arthur rolled his eyes as he thought of this, Riley here ain’t one of them snot-nosed shirley fuckers who buys whatever and whatnot.

Fifteen minutes later, just after lunch, Riley sat behind Arthur on his horse as they rode off to the forest. Hosea told Arthur that Riley was talking about the area behind their camp, just half a mile into the dense woods. Arthur sighed and decided not to get anywhere close, while Riley gets almost trampled. Arthur promised he’d intervene when he believed the boy will die if he doesn’t.

“You have a thing ‘bout not buyin’ horses, boy?”

(y/n) struggled to write as the horse was running. Everything was a pain at the moment. Riding the horse while she was on her period, having to quietly take in the cramp pain while not even letting a soul know about what she was going through. Her stomach tossed and turned with every step the horse was taking, but she knew she couldn’t even let out a quiet moan of pain. After writing her reply, she leaned forward and showed Arthur what she had written by merely extending her hands forward.

Arthur’s eyes caught sight of what she had written as a response, 

Would you buy a baby?

He laughed once before shaking his head. “Aight, but if you die, it ain’t on me.”

(y/n) rolled her eyes and bit her lower lip to swallow a moan. She felt gas well up in her stomach and the urgent need to pass wind hit her face. A wave of nausea hit her once more, before subconsciously gripping Arthur’s shirt from the back. Arthur swore he felt a child’s grip on his back, before turning around silently, catching a glimpse of the boy from the corner of his eye. It seemed like Riley was in a silent sort of pain, and the sight made Arthur slow his horse down a bit.

“Let’s walk from ‘ere.” He said, before getting off.

It took (y/n) a couple of seconds before getting off the horse, making sure not to displace her cheesecloth.

“Ya aight there, Riley?” Arthur asked, making sure not to touch him.

(y/n) nodded before leading him to where she knew the horses were. She had seen them the last time she had come out for a night’s walk, something she didn’t do often. Arthur followed closely behind, spotting something on her that he chose not to disclose. It was not his business until it became so. And until then, he’d keep mum.

A few feet away, both of them saw it. A herd of horses, magnificent and free. A wide range of colors among them—brown, black, while and a couple spotted ones, with wild manes flowing above their heads. Arthur was in awe of such beasts, roaming on their own, carefree and delighted under the sun’s light, understanding slightly why Riley chose not to buy them. You can’t buy such freedom, his mind told him. Look at them, he gasped mentally as the horses rode by themselves, with no one to guide their nature.

She let out a low whistle. While Arthur knew dumb people could whistle, he was still shocked; though, he wouldn’t let Riley know. He watched as the petite boy approached a wild horse that was slightly away from the herd. The horse was mainly white but with a brown mane, a few black spots near the hide. It was a large beast, larger than Riley was for sure, and Arthur thought the horse would merely kick the boy for even trying to go near it.

“Riley, I don’t think—”

Arthur wanted to stop him, but there was something about the way Riley moved that let Arthur know that the petite boy knew what he was doing.

Riley’s arm was extended forward, and a soft whistling followed. It was a tune that Arthur swore he had heard long ago. Riley’s extended hand now came closer to the earth, and this caught the horse’s attention. The horse froze on its spot, staring at Riley who was a few feet away. Riley’s hand slowly reached out once more, but the boy stopped. It was now the horse’s turn. Almost as if it were magic, the white horse approached Riley, sniffing his hand that was extended. Arthur’s heartbeat was matching the sound of drums in his ear. He could not believe his eyes.

The horse smelled Riley’s hand for a full minute, before Riley’s fingers reached and touched the horse’s snout. Slowly, the boy took a step forward and his hand, which was in contact with the horse’s snout, pet the horse’s head now, reaching for its mane, straddling his head and cooing at it with his whistles. Without a second thought, Riley’s other hand reached forward and began petting the horse’s face, with the horse fully comfortable in Riley’s grasp.

The whistling intensified now, and Riley placed his forehead to the horse’s snout, causing Arthur to double take everything he had ever thought of the boy in front of him. He ain’t weak, Arthur thought almost apologetically. I guess there’s a lot of difference between bein’ gentle and weak, he thought, adorning a smile on his face.

(y/n) turned back to Arthur and found him smiling. She smiled back, still petting her new horse. Arthur chuckled once before shaking his head.

○

There was no reason needed for a celebration at camp, (y/n) understood. She chose to call her horse Luna, like the moon. However, she had not told a soul her horse’s name yet. Dutch and the others were busy drinking and partying, which gave (y/n) all the more reason to sneak out and take a bath. She felt sticky and smelly due to her period, which made it all the more difficult for her to want to mingle with the rest of them.

Hitching Luna to her new post, (y/n) pet her horse one last time before heading to her tent as quietly as she could. She grabbed a few more clothes, a new cheesecloth, some cotton, and a larger cloth that she could use to wrap herself with. She had to make sure that she threw away the old cheesecloth, before heading into town and buying more. Unlike the other women she knew, like her mother, (y/n) chose to throw away used cheesecloths instead of reusing them.

It was only half a moon that night. Almost 200 yards away was the stream, and she was sure that no one would ever wonder where she was that night. Hosea and Dutch were already out of it, naming (y/n)’s horse skills as the reason for them to let loose. Mrs. Grimshaw and Annabelle were laughing along, drunk as well. Arthur was teasing John who begged to get something to drink as well, only to end up not liking the taste of the bitter liquid. (y/n) smiled when she thought of John, he might be rough around the edges but he was a good kid.

She stripped so fast it seemed natural. Naked to the skin, she sunk herself into the cold water, letting her nether regions rejoice with the feeling of freshness that the water induced. Shutting her eyes, she leaned back against the rock behind her and used her hands to wash herself everywhere. She missed this feeling—where she could embrace her womanhood. Her body was now how it was meant to be, not hiding the curves of her body or her breasts felt natural to her.

She felt like a part of her soul was missing when her hands touched the edges of her hair, trimmed short like a boy’s head. She remembered back when she used to have longer hair, softer skin and a bandage free chest.

“I’ve missed this…” She whispered, speaking for what felt like the first time in years.

Tears filled her eyes when she thought of what she was doing and why. She missed her brother, she missed her parents, having lost them so abruptly at a young age. She missed herself, in hindsight, wondering why she had to hide—coping with the fear that the o’Driscolls might catch her anytime.

If I find you, I’m gonna kill ya so bad, (y/n), yer gonna wish ya was never born.

Colm’s voice rang in her ears, and tears flowed down her cheeks. A moment later however, time came to a standstill. She heard the rustling of the bushes, and she knew right then and there that it wasn’t an animal. Her heart was beating way too loudly, and she was sure that the sound by itself would be a giveaway to the person who was approaching where she was. She knew she was caught now, she knew that her time in the camp with Dutch and the others was done. She could tame wild horses within a snap of a finger but right then, taming her wild heart took half her life away.

She waited. She waited and hoped in her heart that perhaps it was John who came, and the boy wouldn’t need too much of an explanation.

“Riley…?”

Arthur’s voice alerted her to his position. Arthur stood by the bark of a tree, by which she had shed her clothes and her used cheesecloth. Embarrassment flooded through her veins, for having him see her at her worst. Arthur’s eyes landed on the bloodied cloth and then back at the woman in the water.

Fucking hell, Arthur thought, his eyes slowly widened. John was right.

Perhaps, he needed to have more faith not in Dutch’s words but in John’s.

[syncogon]

[RS] PV 2

it’s ya boi back with more commentary. and hopefully fewer screencaps bc i don’t actually have as much time as my wordy and useless rambles as well as the quarantine situation might suggest alas

- who’s talking in the opening line? kela?? if so, the voice is totally off, but the theme of “the world belongs to the strong” is consistent with quotes from him and themes from that whole arc

- i guess this is a dream / unconscious sequence... i’m sad to see him like this. also one of the analyses i read was like you can track when in the movie a scene probably takes place by the progression of the markings on his skin, which is very obvious and i should be paying attention to that more -

^ i really like this visual. and i like how the galaxy eyes designs are all so distinct

^ Alliance soldiers i think, guessing from the uniforms? bc I thought the Eyes had all black uniforms. but i’m not sure. actually it prob makes more sense it’s the Eyes. rip the one guy facing the wrong (?) direction

^ actually these shoes are consistent with Eyes designs i think. nvm. also is that the announcer robot guy?? why is his body so small is that his real body or something??? what’s happening to him rip

^ what the FUCK is with this tattered cloak design?? it was definitely not tattered before? he would definitely look better with just like, a normal cloak, his cloak would never get tattered unless intentional, this is just a really weird and creepy image. then again ig if it’s part of the dream sequence, but this is implying that this is redeye’s actual design, and i don’t like it. tbh s1 redeye outfit with the short cloak was great

^ kiss kiss ki-

hope we see more of jupiter, the city design is tbh quite cool. though i wonder what exactly this Eye thing is supposed to be? is it part of the tower and just always here? 

THE ENEMY’S GATE IS DOWN

flashback scene! but what about? the golden cube or the engine maybe? but i was hoping for something more interesting.

AW FUCKING HELL THIS FUCKER IS BACK.

FUCK.

ARGHHHHH.

ngl im really disappointed that they decided to bring kela back, i think that defeats the narrative significance of an especially significant arc. we’re already done with this antagonist! let’s move on! it isn’t cool or hip or logical to bring back antagonists when their story arcs have come to such a clean end! throw trash away when you’re done! ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i have more to say but i should move on maybe i’ll write another post/rant or something

yo what the fuck is going on here though. i don’t even know what planet that is jesus

wait is this. a hypothetical or like. an actual. planet. 

ok so. WHOMST THE FUCK is this??? another galaxy eyes secretary? or someone higher rank? surely not the head honcho bc if so i will be super disappointed. actually his vibe kind of reminds me of kela. we’ll see i guess, hope he brings something interesting to the table. 

it’s the guy from the poster! ppl say most likely he’s involved with auroras’ backstory somehow. our four major protag backstories all had like mentor figures, so maybe this is auroras’? but following that logic he shouldn’t be here in present day tho, so. 

wonder what the pink smoke is tho, and also why he’s being shot down, and also everything about him :0

but what’s with the shattered... glass? rock? tornado thing around maidang? hmm. and they’re all just watching... and it’s in the arena with that ox man statue 

white eye. in action! 

AAAAA so i got 2/3 right. so weird seeing ox man just walking tho lmao his proportions look wack he’s way skinnier than i expected. 

hey, hey. kela. look at me. 

bitch.

i like this cut. is it significant? who is this galaxy eyes person OH WAIT if the rumor is true that aur was formerly Eyes then he must be story related to this guy somehow... maybe he was sold to medici or something who knows

this was so cool!!! like sanji from one piece. i dig it.

this actually almost looks 3D modeled for some reason haha

wait so is this... the finals of the tournament? 

what. is the context of everything in this set i’m so curious aaaa

is this a) a cool app of diya’s abilities b) the Eyes guy from earlier attacking but what is that supposed to do, capture magically? c) aur/diya (jidi) moment???

... yeah somehow this whole scene looks 3D modeled. maybe it’s the lighting.

fun char designs to look at?

damn those muscles. but yeah i think a lot more markings appeared after this moment in his revival fight

mmmm.

red eyes... and is the stone purple now?? ahh.

also the cut from this to redeye was really cool! their eyes were like overlapped in positions. so cool. i wonder if this was intentional

maidang has gotten so much better at fighting, like, the basics. i dig it. 

emotional but this just reminded me god i miss s1 diya. competent. cool. occasionally sassy. the movie just made her worry about maidang and weak, it’s like her only personality trait. (actually is this shot from the first movie? i don’t remember.)

god the more i think about it the more the jidi agenda feels like a thing. anyway what’s he blowin up hm.

i kind of wish we got backstory on why this is a bee haha but i like how it’s so distinctive

so cool!!!

beat his ass!!!

tUrBUleNce also gudong so worried :( 

:0

cool new power app??? is this her power. i just thought it was but maybe that one shot of her wasn’t her using her power. who knows.

also the cut from this to aur doing basically the same thing..... (adjusts glasses)

see?? the shading looks fake. hhh

AIGHT ok that’s all. actually there were sound/voice/line comments which i will edit in later. 

ok it is later.

- “i just saw the galaxy eyes fleet surrounding jupiter” sounds like tang wude actually! so im excited, that’s reason for him to get back here in time?

- “i already knew the eyes wanted to destroy solar” sounds like medici...?

- “people need heroes, and to become a hero one must pay a price” ok i really like this line it’s super cool, but i can’t say who is or might be saying it. one of the new antagonistic chars possibly?

- “there is a word called ‘miracle’” sounds like medici, as does “the era of new heroes”, though the latter could be someone else

- rest of the lines are all either maidang or diya or gudong

other thoughts:

ppl kept commenting in chinese on the youtube vid like whens the release like it says right there! on the video! in chinese!

still no medici (visually) or shu, huh. 

sound quality for the trailer was wack tbh. hopefully the movie won’t be like that.

i’m a little worried, actually, that this has lost the core of what made it so good. that it’s become cheap. but only time will tell. i’ll still have hope. 

anyway countdown continues let’s goooooooooooo (pls let me be able to watch...)