#ahh i missed the ladies I need to work on new story posts

[moonwoodhollow]

went into my story save to see what my sims are up to

[bolontiku]

"Hello Again"

Quick Fic

Characters: Reader, Peter Parker, Loki

Posted: Sept 25th

A/N: i still have a few 'do the thing!' Quick fics to finish up but this is the last part for this series and i cannot ever wait to post.

WARNINGS: happy ending?

Like, Comments, & Reblogs are always appreciated and loved.

**Please Do Not Repost My Work**

You stared out of the window, rain fell softly outside and you sighed before hearing a knock on the door. Turning you saw Peter help himself into your place. 

The kid had grown on you. It also helped that he had somewhat become your personal delivery not just pizza but he took your finished orders and paperwork across the city. He was quick and capable, which was rare in such a crowded city like New York. Your coworkers and friends had been impressed and used him as well when he was available which allowed him to quit the pizza job and focus on school.

"Ready?" He asked with a smile.

You nodded and grabbed your cardigan before following him out. 

Peter had found you in the rain, it had been a few days after the incident. The dream?

You had gone out, your little furry friend had yet to come by again and you had become worried. First you hit the streets, but the strays you came across were not the one you had dumped your life story on. Then you went up to the roof. Really it was only logical that the kitten had come through via the roof, the intricate maze could only be how he had come. 

It offered many ways to access your open window.

Peter had found you leaning over the edge, eyes following the various pathways the kitten could have made it. He had surprised you by pulling you back in his strong grip. 

"You are not allowed to kill yourself!" He had chided, which coming from a high school kid had made you crack up.

Of course you didn't know how he had managed to make his way to the roof or how he had guessed he could find you there. You hadn't seen him drop in behind you from thin air. 

It had been that day that the kid had started showing up unannounced at times.

But today was Tuesday and he dragged you out on Tuesdays. He had found a shop which sold books and art supplies and was conveniently placed next to a bakery where the both of you stopped by after a small shopping spree.

You suspected it was his way of keeping you occupied and away from high ledges.

There was also the reminder of the strange man, yet the more you tried to remember what he looked like, the more your memory of him became fuzzy. Peter had insisted there had been no one there when he had arrived too. A memory made up due to your bang to the head? It was possible, but it seemed so real… 

**

"I am ready for my one wish!"

Loki frowned, looking at Peter in confusion. "Wish?"

"You owe me!"

"Ahh," Loki remembered his promise. Honestly, he had trouble lately thinking about anything, his mind wandering lazily. He missed rock music.

"I need you to pick up some text books for me."

Loki jolted back, "excuse me?" 

"Yeah," Peter smiled sheepishly. "See I gotta go run some errands for Aunt May and meet up with the others for a mathletes meeting before the finals and then of course it's almost summer so we are testing this month which means extra studying and the delivery job is kinda busy too and my books that we had to buy last minute are coming today and the only place that would even consider ordering them is The Lost and Found bookstore cause Aunt May knows the lady owner? So, today being Tuesday is kinda busy and I have no one else to ask-"

"I am no a courier-"

"But you said I could ask for anything and I have been doing so much lately-"

Loki raised his hands as Peter's voice pitched higher, "shhh, very well, very well. Where did you say?"

"The Lost and Found" Peter answered with a crooked smile, "oh, and you have to go in person. You'll give them a heart attack if you just magic the books here!"

Loki nodded with a tsk.

**

Oh yeah, it was all coming together. 

Peter grinned to himself as he listened to you mutter about which supplies you would need. "Ah, shit!" He smacked himself on the forehead dramatically.

You looked at him surprised. "What is it?"

"I just remembered I need to get some eggs for Aunt May! But I need to get my books for class-" he paused and looked at you hopefully.

You smiled, "go ahead. I can manage on my own. I will pick up your books. That way I get a couple deliveries done for free."

"YOU ARE A LIFESAVER!" he cried, giving you a quick hug and was off.

You took a few minutes to pick out a few more items and made your way to the line at the front of the shop, bumping into the tall man that seemed to appear magically in front of you. You must have been more than a little put out that you no longer had a bakery companion to have missed him and decided you would just head home, when a few choice words caught your attention.

"Pick up for Peter Parker."

The girl behind the counter nearly crashed into the counter beside her and you craned your neck as she smiled and nodded. "Excuse me!" You moved forwards, "actually Peter was just here and he asked me to pick up his order. I don't think you are supposed to be doing that."

The man tensed at your voice and refused to turn around, which irritated you. Was he really ignoring you? And to be picking up an order that didn't belong to him, what the hell was wrong with him? "Helloooo?!" You tapped him on the shoulder, he had broad shoulders for someone so lean, dressed well too, that had to be armani though you weren't very well versed in fashion you tugged at your homey cardigan. "Look mister, you can't just come and snag some poor kids' school books. I promised to pay for them-"

He turned and raised an eyebrow at you, you stepped back a little surprised. He looked familiar, as if you had met him before. "Oh? Is that correct?" He purred, voice low and sinfully smooth, "Peter asked me to come and pick his school books up for him, a favor I owed him."

You narrowed your eyes at him, unable to shake the familiar feeling. "Yes," the single word dragged out as you eyed the handsome man, "he was just here and asked me to get them for him. What is your name?" You asked, pulling your phone out, you could call him and straighten this out in a few minutes. 

He grinned, reaching out to capture your hand and lifted it, lips ghosting over your knuckles and green eyes flashing mischievously at you, you swore you had seen that look before… "Loki Odinson," he answered, "hello again."

You blinked, "have we met before?"

"Perhaps, once," he answered quietly, your hand still in his cool one. He refused to let go. This was how it was supposed to be and he had a young one to thank for this. "You must be the young lady Peter has raved about so much."

You felt your face heat as he stared at you, "oh? He raved about me?" The thought was funny to you, but you were glad the kid found you interesting enough to talk about you to his friends. 

**

Ned nearly knocked Peter over while MJ just sauntered in grabbing a book. Peter attempted to snatch her back but instead stumbled in after her and grabbed a book himself, holding it up over his face, nevermind it was upside down.

"Looks like it worked," MJ hummed, with a small smile, not looking up as you chattered with Loki.

Ned laughed, punching Peter in the arm, "way to go!!"

Peter caught the green eyed gaze and grinned broadly, the other smirking at him quickly before leading you towards the bakery. "Yeah…"

[nobody-wants-ice-cream]

Everything Wrong With The Umbrella Academy. Episode 1, We Only See Each Other At Weddings and Funerals.

Some context before the cut: This is all in good fun! I wanted to do a really nitpicky re-watch of the series and found some really cool and interesting things I didn’t notice before. This is meant to have a Cinema Sins-esque tone. However, I did take off a lot more sins than Cinema Sins would have because I do genuinely like the series and the people that made it possible. So all of the good things got one sin off and all the bad things got one sin added. This is a really long post, so grab some popcorn. If there’s anything that I missed, feel free to add it!

We Only See Each Other At Weddings And Funerals

The story opens with a random scene. I know why this is important now, but for a first time viewer this is a strange Russian show with no subtitles. Sin for the fact that this opening scene could drive away audiences when they could have opened with Pogo’s monologue or the sudden birth scene. +1

Sudden birth. I know that this is what starts the whole series, but not once do these assholes discuss the implications of sudden birth. That shit is traumatic and must have induced a lot of trauma in the mothers. Sinning for trauma. +1

The russian ladies all help this poor girl. Teamwork and togetherness gets a sin off. -1

How did they get her swimsuit off enough for her to give birth without just taking the whole thing off? Did one woman happen to have a pair of scissors on her so they could cut the crotch? Because one piece suits are not that flexible downstairs. They didn’t take it off her, it’s still covering her. Sinning for lack of realism or explanation. +1

This narration should have happened much sooner. +1

Buying children. Literally buying children. And he gets seven so he buys them wholesale. Seven sins because Sir Reginald Hargreeves is a dick that bought seven children. +7

One sin off for the soundtrack now. All the songs used in this show are bops! -1

Ellen Page starts playing the Lindsey Stirling Phantom of the Opera piece on the lowest string when the piece starts on a high note. One sin for lack of musicality. +1

Minus one sin for Ellen Page’s vibrato. Not many people pretending to play the violin get that so accurate. That or this was the talented body double. Either way one sin off for musicality. -1

“Please send more food” Reginald Hargreeves is a dick to his adopted children. He didn’t feed Luther enough, so who knows what he did to the ones he didn’t like as much. +7

Also, Luther has presumably spent four years in this base on the moon. Did he hit his head every morning? You would think that he would learn to duck. +1

One sin off for the moon plant. -1

I’m taking 10 sins off for the special effects of this entire series. -10

That car transition between Diego’s and Allison’s entrances was out of place. I know it’s meant to show that Allison is far away from the action. But did we really need that? It’s not shown when transitioning from the red carpet to Klaus in rehab. +1

What is keeping the lawnchair that Luther has on the moon down? It looks lightweight. Does he have it nailed to the moon? Is there now a lawnchair on the moon forever? +1

Tom Hopper is an excellent actor. He nailed the “just got the news that my father is dead” without saying a single word. -1

Diego doesn’t bother to untie the family he saves. He caused property damage and severely injured the thugs that broke in. No wonder Patch has a problem with him being a vigilante. +1

“Allison, will you wear Valentino to the funeral” +1

One sin off because Robert Sheehan has already won my heart as Klaus and he hasn’t said a single word yet. And for the little jig he does when he gets the drugs. Interesting choice, but I like it. I could be biased because I’ve watched the series already, but I don’t care. One sin off for Robert Sheehan. -1

Why was Vanya allowed to be playing to this empty theatre with spotlights on her? Does she have an arrangement with maintenance? Is that why the orchestra isn’t set up? +1

One sin off for the Hargreeves mansion. The set designers did an amazing job.-1 

Creepy shrine portrait of Five is creepy and somehow manages to not look like Aidan Gallager. This could be a stylistic choice to show that Reggie didn’t care about Five, in which case, another sin for child abuse. +1 

Creepy statue of Ben is creepy. And it doesn’t look like Justin Min or Ethan Hwang. Who is this statue honoring? +1

It has been stated that Ben’s death broke up the academy. Yet, the other four assholes stuck around for one more portrait after his death? +1

Vanya doesn’t close the doors behind her when she walks into the mansion. +1

Diego’s outfit is central to introducing his character. However, it is dumb as hell and he probably stabbed himself with the knives in the harness multiple times. Especially the ones on his back. +1

Diego is a dick to Vanya at their father's funeral. I know Reggie was a jackass, but Jesus Christ, Diego. Have some tact. I know this is meant to show that Diego doesn’t have any tact, but this is such a severe line. +1

In the first shot of Reggie’s bedroom there are 6 freaking lamps. What is he, Bella Swan? And later, there are three more. +1

David Castaneda really brings Diego to life with his interaction with Luther in Reggie's bedroom. -1

I know I already took sins off for the special effects, but Pogo deserves another two off. Special Effects team, you did good. -2

“How long has it been since Five dissapered” is the most obvious bit of exposition/foreshadowing. To the point where it reads lazy. Another option would be Vanya asking “How long has it been since” and trailing off from there. Pogo knows what happened. This is a crucial reveal, let the audience wait for it a bit. +1

One sin off for Vanya being a good sister to Five. Fluffernutter sandwiches and leaving the lights on is heartwarming.  -1

Props to these child actors for being able to portray the way Reggie treats them and how that affects their emotions in the scene where they wanted to say goodnight to Reggie. -1

However, Reginald Hargreeves is a dick to his adopted children. I will keep sinning this. +7 

After Reggie shuns and ignores his children, Luther’s hand on Ben’s shoulder is a subtle way to show that Luther and Ben were sort of close, which is what an excerpt from Vanya’s book implies in the comics. Good job directors or actors for making that choice! -1

Robert Sheehan in the office scene. This is where we meet Klaus as an audience for the first time with dialogue, and he fucking nails it.  -1

“Thank God he’s not our real father so we couldn’t inherit those cold dead eyes! Ahh! Number Threee-” The delivery on that line is excellent. -1

Klaus’s dangly necklace that looks kind of like dog tags foreshadowing the real dog tags he wears later on in the show. -1

No way in hell Klaus’s skimpy outfit provided enough concealment for that massive box. In fact, in the shots we do see of his back, we should have seen the outline of the box. +1

Sir Reginald Hargreeves is as obsessed with lamps as he is with collecting children. His office is full of them! +1

“Do you think he wears that thing in the bathroom” “Like in the shower” “Yes, absolutely” Allison and Luther have some good interactions. This is where they really act like siblings making fun of another sibling. -1

A woman who told bedtime stories to her kid about her uncle on the moon forgets that said uncle has been on the moon and judges him when he doesn’t know about her divorce.+1 

“Rumor thing” Way to be specific, Luther. +1

Allison’s expression at the family meeting when she takes a sip of her drink. Emmy Raver-Lampman is what makes this character likeable. -1

Reginald Hargreeves was a dick to his children. The whole favorite spot thing? Yeah that. Golden child abuse victim. +7

Sir Reginald playing tennis with Hitler line. -1

Luther accuses his siblings of killing their father. Have some tact man, not at the funeral. This makes sense for the character and his circumstances, but I am still sinning it because Luther doesn’t think he did anything wrong. +1

I feel kind of bad for Luther after his siblings leave the room. Great acting on Tom Hopper’s part. -1

How did Allison get into the bank? +1

Luther straight up throws this man out of a building! That guy is 100% dead. And then he admonishes Five for being a killer later! +1

“Guns are for sissies, real men throw knives!” is a line that would only be spoken by a twelve year old that has never faced the judgement of people he isn’t related to. Also, Diego practiced this line in front of a mirror. +1

But that throw was badass, so... -1

Also, how did Klaus, Diego, Five, and Ben get into the bank as well? We only see Luther enter. And presumably Five teleported in. So were the rest already in there? +1

Five manages to jump faster than a bullet here, but in episode two he’s a lot slower when jumping from one side of the table to the other. You could make the argument that the table is in the way, but there was a human being and a bullet in the way here. +1

“Woah! That’s one badass stapler!” This is the first sin off because Aidan Gallagher can act, and it will not be the last. For all his grumpy 58 year old man, he also manages to shine while playing a young version of said grumpy 58 year old man. You would think that one or the other would be a little weak, but no he nails both performances. -1

But, how did Five switch the gun and the stapler? And why do we never see him do this again with more useful items like a briefcase or one of the machine guns used by the local commission hires? Can he only switch items with a similar mass? How does this power work? +1

Luther is the one that tells Ben that there's more guys in the vault to kill. Not Klaus who could have been like “a ghost said there's more guys in the vault”. What exactly did Klaus do on missions? He isn’t shown helping the hostages or fighting in any way. +1

“I didn’t sign up for this.” yeah Ben, like it’s a summer camp and not your abusive father buying you as an infant and then forcing you to kill people. +1

Kenny’s mom appearance. Also, the woman mixes leopard print leggings, a black dress, a square pattern cardigan, and a hat with stripes and a pom-pom. +1

“Can we go home now” Ethan Hwang had great delivery on that line. -1

Sir Reginald Hargreeves is a dick to his children. He forces 6 of them to kill, and then makes it seem like it’s all fun and games to the one he isolates. +7

When did they get coats and scarves? Did Reggie bring them coats and scarves while coming down to address the crowd? +1

Also, Reggie was on the roof of a different building with vanya! What did the kids do while they were waiting for him? Stand around and look pretty? Not likely, Ben was covered in blood. +1

Also, when did Ben have time to clean up? He is significantly less bloody in the scene where Reggie talks to the press. Yet his mask, uniform, and a bit of his jaw still have blood. This suggests he had time to wipe down. What kind of magic wipes are these that soak up and remove blood quickly and where can I get them? +1

The way the children wear their scarves show their personality. Luther has it done properly, Diego has his flapping around, Allison and Klaus have tied it fashionably, Five has it done well, but not as proper, and Ben has it done like Luthers. Well done costume people or actors who made that character choice. -1

The entire scene when Klaus attempts to summon Reggie from the afterlife. -4

I forgot that Klaus actually calls him Reggie in this scene. I thought it was just a fandom thing lmao. -1

How did Klaus clean up the ashes without leaving evidence on the bar? Did he vacuum it? +1

The cutesy fighting posters are a great set design choice. -1

Allison had her trauma tattoo refreshed at some point. It’s faded on Klaus, but on her it’s perfectly visible and stark. I’m sinning because they don’t show or tell why Allison might want to do this. +1

Also, that guitar Klaus was cuddling in a later scene, was just in the kitchen for some reason. Why? +1

Five and Ben are not part of the I Think We’re Alone Now dance party. I know it’s for plot, but come on! They don’t even have another dance party later to make up for this. +1

Diego and Vanya totally saw each other when Diego went to close the door between the foyer and the living area. +1

Luther and Vanya’s dance moves. No hate on either though because I dance like them if it isn’t swing or any other partnered dance +1

Diego, Klaus, and Allison’s dance moves. -1

Also, the song is heard all the way in the kitchen. There is no soundproofing in this mansion. +1

Luther punching down the airplane is funny. -1

David Castaneda doing those amazing dance moves in character. -1

Oh hello Five. Nice of you to show up and kickstart the plot into being something other than washed up superheroes are really sad and abused. +1

“Daddy!” -1

Why were Five’s powers affecting random objects? +1

Klaus is the only one with self preservation. “I vote for running” +1

“Does anyone else see little Number Five, or is that just me” is a great line because Klaus can see the dead. However, the dead don’t show up in massive portals, otherwise something like that would have happened when we see Dave in The Day That Wasn’t. +1

Five asks for an exact date and then Vanya gives him “the 24th” real specific, Vanya +1 

Five doesn’t close the fridge properly because that doesn’t matter in the apocalypse -1

“In the end I had to project my consciousness forward into a suspended quantum state version of myself that exists across every possible instance of time” “That makes no sense” “well it would if you were smarter” the mark of someone being smart is being able to explain concepts like this in layman's terms. If Five were as smart as he said he was, then he could have been able to come up with an analogy. That or the showmakers have no clue what they’re talking about and wrote a bunch of science-y bullshit to make Five sound smart. +1

Diego was ready to throw hands with Five, someone who looks thirteen and was thirteen until Five explained otherwise. +1

“Dolores kept saying the equations were off” so in other words, Five knew that his equations were off, but he still risked it. +1

But also, Five knew his equations were off, but he was so desperate to see his family that he risked it anyway. -1

Nations Gazette paper has articles that look like they’re actually about the headline. -1

“What part of the future do you not understand.” -1

Aidan Gallagher’s delivery in that scene really set the tone for his character. Impressive. -1

Five decides to dress in the full on school boy getup. Complete with the tie and the blazer when those items aren’t necessary. +1

Aidan Gallagher and Ellen Page are two kick ass actors. They play off each other surprisingly well. -1

“You mean like what happened to Ben” “Was it bad?” What happened to Ben? This remains a sin until they explain it. +1

“May the darkness within you find peace in the light” that sounds really bad. What a horrible thing to have on your statue. +1

Jordan Claire Robbins’s performance of Grace -1

Luther and Diego are so emo that they don't need umbrellas. You’re in The Umbrella Academy! This had to be a personal choice to not carry one. +1

Klaus’s face when Luther dumps out the ashes. -1

The camera cuts to Five when Diego says that Mom gave them actual names. -1

The fight between Luther and Diego is stupid. +1

Klaus and Five fight over who is going to protect who. +1

“Stop it!” “Hit him! Hit him!” -1

The detail on Ben’s statue. It shows his toe and knee have been touched many times by people who presumably miss him and love him. -1

Luther punches Ben’s statue in the crotch, which makes Klaus’s face 10x funnier once you remember that Ben was probably there too. -1 

Luther punches Ben’s statue in the crotch and beheads it, suggesting that Luther had something to do with Ben’s death. -1

Luther punches Ben’s statue in the crotch. +1

Klaus puts his cigarette out in reggie’s ashes. -1

Reggie narration +1

Reggie is a dick to his kids +7

The stupid, bright green jumpsuits +6

What is the point of this exercise? How does running up the stairs make them better heroes? +1

Young Diego either practiced “That’s not fair, Five’s cheating” or his stutter is only there when the plot calls for it. +1

Child Abuse tattoos +12

The fact that Vanya feels left out because she didn’t get a child abuse tattoo. Reggie, you fucked up these kids real bad. +2

We think that Reggie is comforting Luther after he got a child abuse tattoo, but no, he’s actually just attaching monitors to his head. +1

Reginald Hargreeves likes to watch young children sleep. +7

Vanya foreshadowing. Her monitor showing more activity then the cut to her taking one of the pills is brilliant. -1

Vanya still doesn’t close the academy door behind her when she leaves. +1

“An entire square block, 42 bedrooms 19 bathrooms” Five are you a real-estate agent now? +1

“Dad hated children too, but he had plenty of us!” Klaus would be excellent at cinema sins. Seven more for child abuse +7

What are the rules to Five’s jumps? We only really see him jump to places he can see unless he is time traveling or in the instance where he jumps to the car. Speaking of, the car had the keys in it. Reggie, are you trying to get it stolen  +1

Diego is a dick to Allison about her divorce. +1

Klaus and Diego’s interactions make me happy. -1

The Klaus theme is a wonderful piece of music. -1 

Robert Sheehan making David Castaneda laugh. -1 

We get our first glimpse of Luther’s arm here. It’s super weird and vague and only teases the reveal. This is where the ape reveal should have been for the audience and where it would have made sense. Doing the reveal in a later episode is weird. +1

Five doesn’t know how to break correctly, which contradicts “I know how to do everything” +1

Something I just noticed, Five completed the uniform not only with the tie and blazer, but with the hair gel too. +1

The towing guy chooses to sit next to Five at an empty counter. +1

Five looks so offended when Agnes refers to him as “the kid” -1

The creepy smile Five pulls in an attempt to look innocent doesn’t make Agnes scream in terror. Seriously Aidan Gallagher, what the fuck was that that was absoulutely terrifying. +1

+1

Five attempts to relate to a man that looks the age that he should be, but it ends up exceedingly awkward because Five looks 13. +1

The tow truck driver helps him out, but how was Five going to pay for his coffee? We don’t see him with money. Was he just going to jump out to the car? +1

Five never gets his cup of coffee :( +1

“Istanbul was Constantinople/ Now it’s Istanbul not Constantinople”. This whole scene is great. Five plays with them like he did in the bank scene which shows that even if he did age, he didn’t do it around people so he doesn’t have maturity. -1

Five stabs a guy with a mop and kills him. -1

Five stabs a guy in the crotch with a pencil, then uses the same pencil to stab him in the eye. In between he throws a plate at another guy. This is badass. -1

Five jumps in a way that actually does make two of the idiots shoot each other. Which means that technically, Patch was right. -1

Five kills a man with his bare hands. -1

But he stops to put his fucking tie back on. +1

And yet after all that, the goriest thing is when Five pulls the tracker out of his arm.  Props to the makeup department  and Aidan Gallagher’s acting skill for making that look so real. -1

Five should be way sweatier when he walks out of Griddys. Unless he moped that up with some napkins? What are these super absorbent napkins and where can I buy them? +1

Agnes should be far more traumatized. And definitely shouldn’t have survived that. +1

Diego is emo with the monocle. +1

Luther flashback narration. +1

Klaus, thankfully interrupts this. -1 

“Number 6 “Ben” (deceased)” -1

We can see Ben depending on if it’s Klaus or Diego talking. -1

The vigilante mask Diego wears +1

Five jumpscare in Vanya’s apartment. +1

“Rapists can climb” yes Five. Continue with the criminals that can climb. Including you. +1

This whole scene is the best ending to an episode in the entire season. -1

Aidan Gallagher and Ellen Page play off each other with subtle expressions. This acting talent is amazing. -2

“The world ends in eight days and I have no idea how to stop it” “I’ll put on a pot of coffee” roll credits. I love this ending for many reasons. It’s a total mic drop moment. -2 

Overall review:

While actively looking for nitpicky things, I got to see the first in a whole new light. Both the great parts and terrible parts stood out in a way that they didn’t when I wasn’t looking for them. Robert Sheehan, Aidan Gallagher, and Ellen Page were the stand out actors in this episode. All three contributed something significant that didn’t heavily rely on the script writers. 

The child cast also really stood out to me. All seven of them had very limited screen time (I am counting Gallagher playing a child version of his character in this assessment) and they absolutely made the best of it. Out of all of them, Ethan Hwang stood out to me because of his overall great delivery. I hope that we see him play Ben in a more in-depth way in season 2. 

Don’t get it twisted, I genuinely like this series and I think that it tells a great story. I just think it’s fun to nitpick and look deeper. After over analyzing everything else, it’s time to get back to basics. Especially because the season 2 trailer could drop any day now. 

Total: 82 sins

Sentence: Tennis with Hitler and Sir Reginald. 

[mirkwoodshewolf]

Falling for you; Tom Holland x reader

*Author’s note*

And here we go with another fic this time I’m posting up a Tom Holland fic. So the premise of this is that you reader are the daughter of RDJ and have been chosen to be apart of Spider-man: Far from home. I won’t spoil anything else but that’s basic characteristics for you the reader. And like I said this isn’t the end. I’ll be posting some more fics coming up in the next little while.

Warnings: FLUFF, teasing dad!RDJ, injuries (falling off a wire).  

Taglist:

@waddles03​

@psychosupernatural​

@plethora-of-things​

@ixchel-9275​

@dancingcoolcat​

@jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels​

___________________________________________________________

It was like any other day on set. But being the daughter of the one and only Robert Downey Jr. the studio will treat you like royalty, even though I don't want to go to the extreme. And how did I manage to join the cast, well funny story actually for the next Spiderman movie Far from home Director Jon Watts wanted to introduce Peter Parker's new love interest, Carmen Dela Cruz otherwise known as "The Jaguar".

Much like the Black Panther character for speed and stamina, the Snow Leopard was introduced in Spiderman issue 312 number 2, a Latina character from Guatemala, she comes to America hoping to make a better life and save her family from a war that is going on so that they can make a better living in America.

She takes the mantle of "The Jaguar" when she was just 16 years old cause according to the comics, she was beaten and assaulted one night and left for dead but the spirit of the Jaguar warrior came to her and granted her the power and strength of all the jaguar warriors that came before her. She used her powers to get revenge on the gang that assaulted her and has vowed to protect any woman who is threated by assault. She's a protector of women and vows to never let anyone go through from what she went through.

She's teamed up with the Avengers in the past as well as Spiderman but you can see her majorly through the Black Panther comics as being a cat warrior herself, she looks up to T'Challa as a proud mentor and guide.

Now you may be thinking "AHH why another white-washing a character like this?" Well not true, cause you see my mom is actually from Guatemala herself, before my dad met his current wife Susan, after the divorce with his first wife, he met my mom and she ended up pregnant after a one night stand. But even after my birth, I've been constantly taken back and forth between both my parents even though they continued on with their lives and married different people.

But once I became 18, I permanently decided to stay near my dad's while I still visited with my mama. Now I have done acting in school and in college but this was my first breakout and my dad recommended me the part thinking I would be good at it.

So having seen Kevin and growing up with him ever since the beginning he and Jon both gave me a shot and after 2 callbacks, I got the part for Carmen and this would be her big debut onto the screen, as well as my own.

I was currently going over my new lines when I bumped into someone and that someone turned out to be none other than Tom Holland.

"Oh sorry (y/n)." He said.

"No, no it was my fault. Hey, did you get the new re-write of the script?"

"Yeah Jon just gave it to me actually, do you maybe want to go over some lines before we start filming?"

"Sure." We got together along the side and I said, "Can we go over pg.24 I'm having a hard time with that scene."

"Okay pg. 24 it is." We both opened our scripts to pg.24 and Peter first began his line. "What made you change your mind?"

"The same reason why I told you not to get involved with Mysterio in the first place. Maldito you Americans never listen to since or reason, particularly you white boys." I said in Carmen's thicker accent.

"You know, I think it's because you can't resist me. I mean twice in a row we've met you've saved me and always talked to me, even though you said this would be the last time you would."

"Don't be a fool, I'd never fall for someone as reckless as you, Spiderman. Anyone who listens to Stark is automatically a fool to me."

"Don't speak ill of Mr. Stark he is—he was the greatest man to ever live. He—he died a hero."

"I know he did, as did Captain Rogers." For this movie, Carmen always looked up to Steve Rogers as a child because he always knew what was best and he knew to never give up on a fight. He was her hero, even though she never got to meet him.

"Then tell me the real reason why you came and found me?" I turned towards Tom and seeing him so close to me, knowing that our character would eventually be together, but not by the end of this movie, I felt my heart flutter almost chanting out his name as I looked deeply into his eyes. I breathed heavily in character and turned away muttering incoherently in Spanish as it said in the script. "Carmen,"

He took my wrist and a shot of electricity shot up my arm. I turned back towards Tom and seeing him stand so close to me almost made me go weak at the knees. We stared into each other's eyes and just when Tom began to lean forward over a megaphone we both heard my dad's voice.

"Alright you two lovebirds on the set now!" I tensed up and turned towards my dad and flipped him the bird. "Don't you point that finger at me young lady or you're grounded!"

"I'm 20 years old dad you can't tell me nothing!" I cried back out to him. I turned towards Tom and said, "Well we better get to costume and makeup."

"Yeah guess we should." He said solemnly. We stood there in silence before he cried out as he took on ahead, "Race you!"

"Hey no fair you got a head start!"

Filming proceeded as planned, I was now being strapped onto some wires for the last big fight scene with Mysterio.

"You all good?" asked the stunt director.

"Yeah I'm all good. I can do this stunt Erik don't worry about it."

"Okay, but I'll have Stacey on standby should you need her." I nodded and saluted to my stunt double Stacey and Jon then told me how things were gonna go.

"Alright so Tom's already been swung into the crates, you come up from the top of the warehouse and meet up to Jake. All you need to do right now is just grab onto him, don't begin any of the fighting sequences yet, we'll work on that on the levitation bars."

"You got it Jon" I gave him a thumbs up.

"Alright you're all set." Aaron my wire guy said.

"Thanks dude."

"Alright clear the set please!" Jon said into his megaphone. I crouched down on my marker and waited for rolling and then action. "Quiet on the set please!" I took a couple of deep breaths and got into Carmen's mindset as I stared at Jake who was on wires just ahead of me. "And action!" The crates moved around which was my cue to jump out and just before I reached Jake, I let out the Jaguar Warrior cry but on my first take I totally missed Jake by like three feet.

The entire crew was laughing as were me and Jake.

"That was terrible!" I cried out. "Can that please be in the blooper reel!?" I laughed out.

"Reset let's go again!" Jon called out. I was then guided back to my cue point and I set myself down on the catwalk and went back to my marker. "Rolling, take 2! And.....action!" Th crates moved again and this time I jumped from a different angle and let out the Jaguar cry again and this time I managed to grip onto Jake. "Cut! Okay that was great! Let's just get one more for safety!". I released Jake and I was guided back to my catwalk.

But as I got there I noticed that one of the wires seemed a bit loose one me, with Jon starting from the top for a final take, I tried to hurry and tighten the wire as best I could and quickly got to my marker.

"Places please! And.....action!" The scene repeated itself and as I leapt out on cue, suddenly the wire snapped and I was dangling by one wire.

"Okay not good! Not good!"

"Cut! Get the mats under her now! Hang on (y/n)!" I looked towards Jake who was trying to come over towards me and he reached out telling me to take his hand. Just before I could grab it, my second wire snapped and I fell over 10 feet from the air and landed on the mat beneath me.

I let out a groan and soon I heard voices surrounding me and I heard emergency services telling everyone to back up and give them some room. I felt this sudden pain in my arm as I let out a scream of pure agony.

"We know sweetheart, we know but you have to lie still for us" one of them said as they began to examine me. "Broken shoulder, we have to get her to the hospital, get the gurney in here!" I was then set up on a gurney as I screamed and moaned in pain.

I was wheeled across the set and to an ambulance vehicle and I heard one of the men say.

"Now Ms. Downey, I'm gonna give you a sedative, it should help dull the pain and help you sleep. You'll be alright, we're taking you to the hospital now." Next thing I knew my vision was going fuzzy and then I went out like a light.

When I woke up, I found myself in the hospital with a sling over my arm and my shoulder bandaged.

"You're awake," I turned to my right and saw Tom standing before me, as well as Harrison and Zendaya.

"How you feeling chic?" asked Zendaya.

"A little funny, so what do I got?"

"You broke both your shoulder and your wrist in the fall plus a mild concussion. The doctors said you're lucky to be alive, most people falling from that height usually end up in a coma if not dead or multiple broken body parts."

"Gee thanks Harry" I said sarcastically.

"Good to know the Downey sarcasm is still intact." Zendaya praised.

"Hey guys could you give us a moment along please?" Tom asked. Zendaya and Harrison both looked at each other with a know it all grin before Zen said.

"Sure, fine."

"Don't have too much fun you two." I flipped them off as they left my room leaving Tom and I alone.

"How are you feeling?" he asked me.

"A bit in pain, but I've had worse, once I broke my leg when I was just 9 years old doing a risky bicycle stunt that my friends dared me to do. Boy dad was so pissed he never let me ride a bike again for 6 months."

"You serious?"

"Yeah." When I looked back up at Tom, I noticed that his eyes now held such worry and fear as he said.

"When you fell I—I was so worried that you'd....that you were gonna be.... I even tried to ride with you to the hospital but they wouldn't let me. God never before did I wish I really was Spiderman I—"

"Shhh it's okay Tom. It wasn't your fault. I should've spoken up and had the wiring guys tighten my wire before anything. If it's anyone's fault, it's mine." I then felt Tom take my free hand in his and I looked right back into his eyes again.

And damn that heartrate monitor because it was starting to spike up and I let out a groan of embarrassment to which Tom softly chuckled and he said.

"If it helps you feel better, my heart would probably be doing the exact same thing." I looked at him and he continued, "When I first met you I—I thought you were the prettiest girl I've ever seen, I know the press always says that it's me and Zendaya but truthfully I hope and pray that once Far from home comes out that they'll start to say you and me. God I hope I didn't freak you out or ruin this friendship because I—" I stopped him with a kiss.

He placed his hands on my cheeks as the kiss got a little deeper before I finally separated from him.

"You're so much like Peter, you ramble on too much." He chuckled nervously and he said.

"So....when you're released do you—wanna go out for coffee or something?"

"Coffee sounds wonderful, Parker." I teased using Carmen's accent as I said Parker.

"Cara mia Carmen." He leaned in and kissed me once more. Just before anything could go further we both heard my dad's voice say.

"Alright you two, don't be sucking each other's faces off!" We separated from each other and we both cleared our throats in embarrassment.

"Really dad?"

"Hey! Be thankful that once you two lovebirds got together I was gonna allow hand holding and little pecks but after my virgin eyes have been tainted with what I had just seen I may not allow any PDA at all." I shook my head at him and I turned my attention back to Tom and he smiled down at me as he took my hand in his and gave my knuckles a kiss.

Man I wish my release would come faster, I really could use that coffee right about now.

[garthups]

the maze, part I

Part One of the story! Very excited to post this. -Leslie

I kept the car running in park while the shitty vents sputtered, trying my hands warm. Your Love by that band from the eighties was playing in the distance. I have a love-hate relationship with these roped off grassy parking lots, where there aren't actual spaces, just car anarchy. Take any spot you can find and let’s all hope that some semblance of a parking lot comes together. Sure there’s something inherently egalitarian about it, but they remind me of being scared to park when I was learning to drive. I was always positive that my Camry was too far over, and I’d brace myself for the crunch of metal on metal. 

The familiarity of coming to the maze made parking in the lot easier, and I didn’t have to reverse and drive into the same spot over and over again to be satisfied. My friends and I came to Hudler Farm every October for the autumn corn maze. Sometimes we’d take caramel apples in and chaunk through them while meandering.

 Fuck, that was always so fun. High school seems like a lifetime ago though. All it takes are a few hundred miles, and staggered midterms, and suddenly you talk to the guy in the dorm next to yours who gets drunk on natty seltzer more than the people who got you through your mcr phase.

 None of us got together last year, which was a bummer, but out of the blue Lottie messaged Sam and me. I watched the shadowy families walk by in the dark, my hands weren’t getting any warmer though. The idle LEDs were dim enough that I could see outside. A little boy running after his parents tripped and fell in the mud. I stifled a chuckle, because kids falling down is hilarious, and tried to screw with the vents, but they were already all open. Piece of shit car. When I looked up, the boy was still splayed out on the ground, shivering. Both his parents kept walking though. I scrunched my brow. I started fidgeting with my seatbelt, but my hands didn’t have much feeling in them. People were just walking around him, like he wasn’t there. 

“WHAT’S up dog!” My door exploded open.

“JESUS fucking god Lottie, I--” She took her spot in the passenger seat, laughing her ass off.

“Sorry sorry sorry, wow Phoebs I got you pretty good huh?”

“I mean yeah I’m just so ready to get killed in this parking lot. Hey I think that kid hurt himself out there pretty bad.” I breathed, still shaken.

“What kid?”

“That one.”

“Oh that one, sorry it’s dark, so it took me a sec. Yeah let’s go help.” Honestly, I could never stay mad at Lottie. Seeing her new dreads in person made me miss the big buns she wore in high school. We slammed the doors shut, and stepped onto the ground covered in too-damp leaves. Two guys beat us to him though, and they were helping him up.

“Oh wait, is that the kid you meant?”

“Lottie, why would I be talking about a kid that isn’t sprawled out on the ground.”

“I thought this one was playing snake or something. Anyway, let’s go meet Sam’s friend!”

We walked over to the boys, Sam’s friend was getting the kid back on his feet. Sam’s friend was a good head taller than he was, which wasn’t saying too much. The guy gave off an eagle scout vibe though, so his height was probably pretty important to him. Maybe camp counselor would have been closer. He was gently reassuring the kid.

“Feeling better? Okay, better go catch your folks, and make sure not to stay too far behind them, bud, okay?”

“Good call man, I thought he was just playing snake.” Sam glowed.

“Sup fuckers!” Lottie sang. The boy turned around, he looked about nine, so Lotties curse made him bust a grin. From the looks of it he scraped his cheek pretty bad. He dashed off. Sam’s friend laughed nervously since Lottie broke the unspoken rule of swearing in front of kids.

“Hey dudes! It’s so awesome to see you!” Sam laughed. “I told Matrix everything about you, so there’s no need to divulge any information to him. Don’t trust this guy with any more embarrassing stories about yourselves.” Matrix waved shyly, and I rolled my eyes.

“That’s cool. You know we called Sam “Shrimpy” all of sophomore year because his hair got all curly and he dyed it red?”

“Thanks Phoebe, that is something I like people to know about me.” Sam said while subconsciously making sure his hair was still a tight buzz cut. Matrix smiled a little.

“You must be Lottie?”

“It’s great to meet you! Lets get some apples.” 

The four of us were waved through by the teen collecting tickets. The entrance to the maze had a little banner raised up on two poles and a chair with an admissions person. Next to the entrance was a main pavilion with a tiny shop and some picnic tables out under the roof. Lots of families were congregating there, buying souvenirs and farm t-shirts. Thankfully this wasn’t one of the maze theme nights according to a big promotional calendar that outlined all the dates. Lottie groaned when she saw that they added alien night and we hadn’t bought tickets.

“Like what does that even mean though. Are there aliens in the maze? Do they scare us?” Sam said eyeing the kettle corn buckets.

“Yeah I mean, it’s probably just like zombie night and mermaid night where you just get like jumpscared by teens in costumes. Freakin aliens though! Imagine!”

“Uhh did you say they do a mermaid night here?” Matrix said.

“Dude I never told you about that! You’re looking at the three scariest volunteer mermaid teens that Hudler farms has ever known. We were unholy legends flopping after scared families.”

Sam and Lottie were wide eyed crowding around Matrix, telling him all about the glory days. Made me pity him, his bud probably had a whole different energy at college.

“They’re fucking with you! Why in god’s name would a corn maze have a mermaid night.” I finally shouted. Lottie pouted.

“Boooooo Phoebe! How dare you!” I wrapped my face up in my scarf to escape guilt. 

We all mostly ate our caramel apples under the pavilion just so we could give Matrix the rundown of the maze. The Hudler farm maze has these eight checkpoints which give you special tickets. 

“We don’t leave without all eight. Got it? Dee oh en tee. I don’t give a fuck if we die trying.” Lottie said through a mouth of caramel and nuts. It felt surreal having my friends here again. After all, the limited exposure I had to them was social media. I lived vicariously through the photos they posted of new friends.

There was a sign in the pavilion that gave us a rough idea of where all the checkpoints in the maze were. I resisted the urge to take a photo in order to preserve the challenge that the maze posed. Probably didn’t need it to beat our best time. I was the only one who hadn’t finished their apple for traditions sake. Hopefully the caramel wouldn’t freeze though.

“Ok so let's remember to hit that cluster of checkpoints in the northern corner first. We're gonna take a lot of rights and then keep going on that long stretch forward.” I strategized.

“I’ll eat that apple if you’re not going to Phoeb, you know I’m psyched that they got pink ladies this year instead of grannies smiths.” Begged Sam.

“I did a few youth group trips to corn mazes, so this isn’t my first rodeo guys don’t worry!” Matrix added.

“That’s cool.” Phoebe said straight faced. I wanted to laugh, but didn’t want to hurt his feelings.

Before I could respond, I saw it. I inhaled slowly as I took in the scene before us. The moon was thin and most of the lights were under the pavilion itself, but I felt like I should’ve noticed something so wrong before.

“Why is the all corn so fucking tall.” The question, er -- statement hung in the air for a few seconds while the maze came into view for everyone else. Corn stalks get surprisingly tall late in autumn, maybe like ten feet. This stuff though. It was like, way way way too tall. And not irregular. So, regular. The maze looked like it could have been a trimmed hedge. All the stalks stretched up and up, reaching out for the sky, each of them trying to escape from the ground. I suddenly was at a loss, something so ordinary was wrong in such an obvious way. Finally, Lottie broke our silence.

“Shit.” Great. I mean, she wasn’t wrong.

“That’s amazing. God is it this tall every year? That’s the tallest corn I’ve ever seen, must be 30 feet! Maybe more.” Finally Matrix had found something to be upbeat about.

“Ahh no man. It’s like normal usually. Lottie are you feeling alright? Do you want to take a sec before we head in.”

Matrix jumped in. “Nothing to be worried about. I’m sure it’s just like GMO’s or something. Gotta up the yield. They should seriously lead with that in the advertising though. Corn jungle! Towering Corn! Feast your eyes ladies and gentlemen on the worlds first corn metropolis!” He broke the spell on Lottie with his campy broadcaster voice. She joined in: “Keep your dame close as you delve into the mysterious corn caverns, where the CORN DRAGON DWELLS.”

Matrix Chuckled. “Well I don’t know about that. Hard to deliver on a corn dragon. But look I’m sure it’s fine, everyone else doesn’t seem to mind.” It was true, the usual fare of families and teen groups were venturing into the maze without concern. I watched the family from the parking lot get a safety flashlight from the teen working the entrance. I breathed in through my teeth.

“For a second I thought you actually made jokes, scooter. You’re right, it’s probably just a good year for tall corn. We can go.”

“Phoebster, you good?” Sam nudged me. It honestly took me a second longer than Lottie to take in all the explanations. It was such a weird thing to be off in such a significant way. Must have been some primal instinct of being afraid of the dark. The corn stalks were darker than the night sky around them; I tried to catch glimpses through the stalks but they blanketed out the stars. 

“Yeah sorry about that guys. I’ll remember more of the strategy once we’re in the maze. Let’s blow through this thing!” 

We went into the maze.

[thestorytellersapprentice]

Over Booze and Buzz

Pairing: Jo Yeong/Myeong Seung-ah, Lee Gon/Jeong Tae-eul

Fandom: The King: Eternal Monarch

Tags: Fluff, Friendship, Formalwear, Alternate Universe, Parallel Universe

Summary: In which The Captain let loose (at first) in celebration of the King’s birthday. There's booze involved in this, Tae-eul would so much approve.

Notes: Unbeta-ed. Post drama, written before the 13th episode aired, so pretty sure this is not canon. At all. This fic was written mostly because I agree with Myeong Seung-ah. Some men (especially Jo Yeong), all covered up (especially in suits), are terribly hot. And also because we need some light hearted stories before the finale :)

Link: ArchiveofOurOwn

~

As a personal rule, Jo Yeong only drinks two times a year, max. Once, on the birthday of His Majesty, The King of Corea, Lee Gon, and then the only other time was, lately, on his own birthday.

It was not because he had zero tolerance or despised the taste. No, far from it. He actually preferred soju than beer, but he even came to like the Mixing-Shaking-Drinking-style drink that Lieutenant Jeong Tae-eul - former Lieutenant, he reminded himself - introduced him to, and would even admit that he missed it terribly.

However, now that he was fully back to his life and duty as Captain of the Royal Guards in Corea, Yeong simply could not afford to let his reflexes dulled and judgement compromised, even just for a few hours. Multiple lives, including the King’s, Royal Court’s, and his country could be at stake.

But still, he made an exception, for Lee Gon. Only for his best friend Lee Gon.

Yeong clinked his can of beer with His Majesty’s before they both took a gulp.

“Ahh, I totally miss this, Yeongie,” Lee Gon sighed in contentment, a wide smile on his face. “Do you know why I always look forward to my birthday? It's not because of all of the grand celebrations that Lady Noh throws me: the party, cakes, presents, the kind, but because it’s the only time you're gonna have a drink with me.”

Yeong responded by raising one of his eyebrows. “Oh yeah? But that never stops you from asking, does it, Pyeha?”

The King laughed. “I am a man of perseverance, after all. Look what I’ve accomplished! After years and years of asking, you were finally willing to have a drink with me on your birthday too. You know how thrilled I was, right? Took me four years, but progress!”

Yeong gave out a small smile at that, recalling the memory. A few years back, the moment he finally said yes, the King had stood there unblinking for a few seconds, uncharacteristically at loss for words. It was quite an entertaining sight.

“And by the way, I thought you’ve changed,” the Monarch continued, fully protesting now, “I saw you drink openly when you were in the Republic!”

“That’s because you weren’t there.”

Lee Gon made the motion like he had just been shot on the heart. “Ouch, that hurts.”

Yeong just dismissed his King’s antics. "You know what I mean."

Back then, in the Republic of Korea, he was not Jo Yeong but Jo Eun-seob, a mere civilian, who happened to get tangled up in the conspiracies of the two worlds and did some investigations himself. There, he had no King (and best friend) to protect. There, on the other hand, he traded his needs for 24/7 of vigilance with 24/7 of endless worries, because said King had returned to their world with his counterpart without any means to contact them due to the technicalities of the different worlds.

So, yeah, Yeong was fully aware that he was breaking his own rules, but back then, alcohol had been more than essential as his coping mechanism.

Not that he would ever tell the King about the last part, though.

"Anyway, thank you for drinking with me, Yeong-ah." Lee Gon leaned his head back against the headrest. “You see, this, right here, right now,” he remarked, “life is good.”

Yeong let himself hummed in agreement, returning the sentiment.

They were sprawled on the sofa in His Majesty’s study. The King, sporting semi casual clothes of a white collarless shirt and a dark blue vest, was in a relaxed position. He had his hand, which was holding the beer, resting on one of the propped up pillows. Beside him, the Captain was in his suit uniform as always, but had stripped off his suit jacket and folded it up on the nearby chairs. He wasn’t wearing a tie that day, though, and had unfastened the first few buttons on his shirt.

On the table in front of them, the many cans and bottles of beer were mixed in with soju and their glasses, still stacked neatly. They were untouched, for now, due to their mutual agreement that the infamous Jeong Tae-eul's mix of beer and soju was to be kept for later rounds.

To say that Lee Gon had definitely gone overboard was probably an understatement. Yeong was pretty sure that the amount of alcohol had doubled since his last birthday, and he was having difficulties seeing the actual surface of said table.

They were only halfway through their second cans of beer when someone knocked on the door.

“Come in,” Yeong shouted. He did not bother to straighten his back, let alone get up. His Majesty Lee Gon’s birthday was also the one day where he let himself be the best friend first instead of Captain of the Royal Guards. Plus, he was way too comfortable anyway.

He turned in his seat to see Myeong Seung-ah letting herself in, holding a tablet in her hands.

“Pyeha, I terribly apologize, but-” Her voice instantly trailed off once she witnessed the sight in front of her. “Oh, uhh…”

As a new addition to the Palace, less than a year in, Yeong was sure that Seung-ah had yet to get familiarized with their annual habit.

Over the years, Yeong had amassed quite a collection of how people in the Palace reacted to them getting wasted: some were appalled (just Lady Noh, mostly), some highly approved (Secretary Mo), some were fascinated by their curious timing, and a few (almost all of them female, but he did not keep count, really) made awkward attempts to invite him to drink with them later on, to which he obviously denied.

Judging by her nervous glances which alternated between the two men, Yeong would guess that she had a hard time deciding which sight shocked her more: her King slouching carelessly like he had blended onto the sofa, or the Captain holding a beer sans his suit and soldier pose, possibly drunk.

He supposed it was the combination of the two.

To her credit, Seung-ah seemed to be able to recover pretty quickly. Her expression reverted back to that of strict professionalism (to which he very much approved) as she cleared her throat and tried again. “Secretary Mo is looking for you, Pyeha. She has questions about Lady Jeong’s insistence on some protocols.”

The infliction in her voice was clearly an explanation on itself. Yeong could instantly picture Jeong Tae-eul having a fit over the many ancient traditions of the Kingdom. That lady sure was feisty, she could even handle herself against Head Court Lady Noh, which was pretty impressive. Secretary Mo almost didn’t have a chance.

The King turned towards him with an alarmed look on his face. His eyes quickly darted to the beer he was holding, and he needed no words, really. Yeong knew precisely what was on the King's mind.

He stopped the Monarch before he managed to take two fresh beer cans, swapping them with the soju bottles instead. “Pyeha, I’d suggest you take these instead.”

Jeong Tae-eul was famous for her affinity to strong alcohol, after all.

Lee Gon smiled widely at that. “You’re brilliant, Yeong-ah.”

He gathered the bottles and shot glasses onto his hands then stood up. “We’re resuming this tonight. I don’t care if the party ends way past midnight, it’s still my day. My after party. It’s the King’s order.”

The King then turned to Seung-ah with a mischievous smile in his face, “You’re my witness, Miss Myeong Seung-ah.”

~

As soon as the King had departed the room, Seung-ah approached him with a small smile on her face. “Wow, it’s you, Jo daejangnim, loosening up,” she commented. “Daebak.”

Yeong let out a small smile himself. He lifted one of the unopened beers. “Want one?”

He could almost see the gears in the Public Affairs staff’s head turned, as if she was calculating how much she could get in trouble for succumbing to the temptation of alcohol just before the grand party, which he supposed she still needed to oversee.

But she finally relented. “Yeah, okay,” she said, placing her tablet on the edge of the table after rearranging some of the cans and bottles to make space. She cracked open her beer. "I don't know that you drink."

"I mostly don't,” Yeong replied, resting his arms on his knees. “But the Royal Guards have vetted the entire guests, aids, security details, their family, friends, colleagues, distant acquaintances - everyone - multiple times over the last few months, so I’m confident.”

Not to mention, his fellow security details, the ones who would accompany the many military personnels, politicians, foreign delegations, celebrities, everyone who’s who for that night, had done and coordinated their own security checks and protocols with them. The security level of that night's event was simply beyond impenetrable.

"You must have," Seung-ah agreed. "I can't believe it took me more than an hour to enter the Palace every day this week. I've worked here for months and I even know almost everyone from your team by name!"

Yeong felt a swell of pride for his team at that admission.

He took another sip.

He had to admit, it was nice to be able to let go, even just for a short while. The warm buzz of the alcohol was most definitely comfortable.

Now that the nightmare with Lee Lim was all over, finally, finally he could breathe so much easier. Himself, the King, Lady Jeong Tae-eul, as well as the whole Palace and Kingdom of Corea. No more waiting for the other shoe to drop ever since the King told him that the traitor was still alive. He had prepared himself for such battles and so much more his whole life, but Yeong still had to admit that those particular few months of going back and forth the parallel worlds were absolutely bad for his stress levels and taking its toll on him, both physically and mentally.

“Oh, that reminds me,” Seung-ah turned on the screen of her tablet. “Can you meet me fifteen minutes before the gate opens? I have to freshen up and take care of some minor stuff first, but I still need to prep you.”

“Prep me for what?”

“The Royal Guards’ uniform,” she replied, but Yeong still didn't really follow.

The Palace Wardrobe Department had sent a notice to his office, regarding the guards’ dress code for the night. He had only glanced at it, because just like the year and many years before, the Royal Guards would wear their three piece suits for the night, including himself.

He belatedly realized that she should be talking about their ties.

Yeong gave out an involuntary shudder. “It’s not bow ties again this year, is it?”

Two years ago, Lady Noh had them all wear patterned bow ties, which he hated with a passion. He remembered looking at the photos plastered upon the Kingdom's newspaper the day after and feeling the strongest urge to sue the Head Court Lady for infringement of decent fashion sense.

He still kind of wanted to, to be honest.

Seung-ah laughed. “No, you have my word,” she said. “But I’ll have you know, you still looked extremely good in them, daejangnim.”

Yeong raised one of his eyebrows. He noticed that for some reason, Seung-ah had her gaze locked in on the general direction of his collarbones as she said that.

Yes, that is Myeong Seung-ah, Yeong thought. She was as direct as she always was.

And, well, Yeong had to admit that he really did not mind if she was, indeed, checking him out.

~

After taking a quick shower, Yeong returned to the Royal Guards' locker room to change.

It was currently empty. He supposed everyone had headed out towards their respective posts already. Yeong checked his watch to confirm that he still got about twenty minutes before the Palace gates were opened for the early arrivals.

The Captain put on his shirt, which was all white, just like the other Royal Guards on duty that night. He was in the middle of putting his earpiece on when Myeong Seung-ah came in, bringing a tray filled with tie selections and a large box with her.

“Why are you the only one to bring the ties?” he asked. He expected one of the palace maids to accompany her, but apparently, she came alone.

“Because none of the palace maids know how to do the Eldredge knot perfectly, while I do.” She should have registered the blank look on his face, because she continued with a small smile, apparently amused, “And because I also doubt you’ve even heard of it, daejangnim.”

The what knot, now?

“What’s wrong with Full Windsor?” He inquired. Yeong might not know too many knot varieties, he simply had no time. But at the very least, he knew that the Full Windsor was always a proper option.

“Nothing, but tonight is the first birthday party that the King shares with Lady Jeong, so he wants every little detail to be a bit more special. And, my Captain, the Eldredge knot is a work of art, that I can assure you." Yeong could clearly see that Seung-ah enjoyed teasing him. It was hard to overlook the mirth in her eyes as she uttered the last sentence.

“Miss Park In-young had chosen the Trinity knot, by the way, which looks fantastic on her.” Seung-ah had put down the tray on top of the box and was inspecting his vest and suit jacket, clearly looking for the best pattern or color that would match them best. “But you are the Captain, so you should have the most exquisite one.”

Seung-ah lifted her first choice. The tie was dark navy in color, with some sort of dragon-scale texture which gave out a subtle glimmer to the fabric. “What do you think, will this do?”

"Sure," he said. And he meant it, despite his monosyllabic answer.

For his day-to-day, he did not feel the need to be flashy, just immaculate, so he usually went for solid colors whenever he opted to wear one. Yeong had no objections to subtle patterned ties for special occasions, though, and the one that Myeong Seung-ah currently held screamed nothing but opulence, which he thought was highly appropriate for celebrating his King and best friend Lee Gon's birthday.

“Okay, please stand still,” she laughed at her own bad soldier jokes.

Standing in front of him, Seung-ah upturned his shirt collar and placed the tie around his neck before crossing its skinny end over the wide end at the front.

As she began to work, Yeong started to take note of their height difference. Myeong Seung-ah was not a tiny lady, but she was still a good fifteen or twenty centimeters shorter than him. He mostly saw only the top of her hair as her hands continued to weave the piece of fabric for him.

Her hair smelled nice, he thought. No, she smelled nice.

Yeong was fully aware of their proximity then.

After probably a minute or two and some initial loops, she leaned back to assess the moves she had made. “Okay, so far so good. It’s not too tight, is it?”

Is it not? Yeong felt the room got slightly warmer. “Hm,” was all he offered.

For some reason, Seung-ah grinned at his curt response, he did not know why. She tended to do that a lot, now that he really thought about it. It started to nag him.

Looking down, he watched her return to her task, carefully making some more loops and at one point pulling the skinny end and tightening it. She tugged the fabric with one hand as her other hand held the knot in place. Yeong doubted that she realized it herself, but apparently, when she was deeply concentrating on something, Myeong Seung-ah would produce a slight frown on her face and her lips form a tiny pout.

Yeong let out the tiniest smile.

Her eyes were even prettier from up close, he mused. She probably put something on for the night, because they gave out an extra sparkle-

"And…" his thought was interrupted by the lady in question, who in the meantime was moving her fingers close to his jugular. “I just have to hide the rest here, and we’re done.”

She finished the knot by tucking the rest of the skinny end of the tie behind his right neck loop.

After that, Seung-ah moved closer, closing the gap between them, as she needed to tiptoe a bit just so she could reach the backside of his collar in order to fold it down. Once she did, Yeong was hyper aware of how her hands brushed slightly over his collar, and then also his chest as she straightened his tie for the final touch.

Yeong blinked.

"There," she said, taking a step back to admire her handiwork, and the way she looked at him made him even more uncomfortable.

Did she just throw him a mischievous grin?

Her phone rang before he could respond.

Seung-ah quickly put it in silence as she apologized, “Oops, sorry, it’s my alarm. We gotta go!”

Her eyes darted around the room, and Yeong realized that she should be looking for someplace to change into her partywear for the night. She was indeed still wearing her pantsuit, and the large box she was carrying earlier should consist of her dress.

“Do you need somewhere to change?” he inquired.

Instead of directly answering, Seung-ah jumped straight into her own question. “Um, would you mind if I do it here? Can you turn?”

Yeong just nodded, then without saying another word, he turned on his heels and made a point to face the door, just as an extra precaution.

In the meantime, he continued to prep himself.

After checking his reflection on the mirror on his locker door (which was carefully angled to respect her privacy completely), Yeong could say that he very much approved of this so-called Eldredge knot. It looked highly intricate and lavish.

He soon reached for his own vest, which had bullet-resistant lining sewn inside, and started to put it on, while at the same time silently appreciating its convenience before he moved efficiently to put on his gun holder and suit jacket next.

He was about to turn on his communication line when Seung-ah’s voice called out from behind him.

“Daejangnim?” Her voice was hesitant. “Can you help zip me up?”

When Yeong turned, Seung-ah had her back to him, her hands busy trying to hold down her dress from flying open. She looked sideways at him with a sheepish expression on her face.

“I can only zip them up halfway,” she explained.

He could not help but stare at her dress. It was soft peach (he guessed), layered in laces, and flowing all the way to her ankles. It was not too tight, but he could tell that it should hug her figure nicely, even though he only saw it from the back and it was still in its unzipped state.

Yeong had to admit, that color looked totally good on her.

“Jo daejangnim?” she called him again when he did not respond. “Some help, please?”

“Oh, yes,” he finally moved to assist her.

He quickly identified where the hook and loop on her dress were located and united them. Then, he placed one of his hands where Seung-ah stopped zipping, careful not to touch her somewhere inappropriate, as his other one pulled up the zipper slowly. He carefully trained his gaze elsewhere except to her exposed skin the whole time.

When he’s done, Seung-ah spun to face him, and his breath hitched involuntarily.

“You look- wonderful,” he breathed out.

Seung-ah’s smile was wide. “You do too.” She looked at him from head to toe, and did not even bother to hide the appreciative look on her face.

Yeong took a step forward.

She stayed put. Her gaze upon him did not break at all. Instead, Yeong watched as she tucked her hair slowly and bit her lip as her gaze travelled down from his eyes to his lips, and then lingered on-

And, well, that was the last straw. Yeong simply could not help himself at that point.

He completely closed the gap between them in one long stride, and without saying anything else, he leaned down and claimed her lips with his own. 

And he really took his time with it.

~

Later on that night, the King and his soon-to-be Queen huddled together near the three-layered birthday cake that was slightly bigger than her. They finally had a moment to themselves after shaking hands and making small conversations with the guests all night.

Gon had his eyes trained on her best friend, who was currently standing beside Myeong Seung-ah with wine glasses on their hands. She was apparently saying something, then laughed at his response before putting her hand on the Captain's elbow. He, on the other hand, did not seem to mind that gesture at all.

Instead, the King watched as the Captain leaned close and then whispered something in the lady's ears. Lee Gon soon was flabbergasted, and also thrilled, when he saw the smile on Yeong's face.

"Yeong was late to my party - he's never been late to anything! - and now he's being like that? Do you see that? Tell me that you see that!"

“Told you, booze is magic,” Lady Jeong Tae-eul whispered conspiratorially. "And, well, this means I win, right, Birthday Boy?"

Beside her, the Monarch laughed a hearty laugh.

She might be onto something, because at that moment, one thing that the King was really certain of was that he would not get to resume his drinking session with Yeong that night after all.

~

Visual Ref: Yeong’s tie in the Eldredge knot / Seung-ah’s dress

[earthbovndmisfit]

Kiss me, Mister Joestar! (fanfic)

A Victorian gay man is madly in love with the sweetest gentleman. His love for him is so overwhelming that everyone around them seems to have noticed it already, including said gentleman's wife, who our sweet gay icon has become close friends with...

Is Jonathan really /that/ painfully oblivious to it all? Or could there be something more going on...? Whatever it might be, it's driving Robert insane, and things start getting even tougher on the matter for Speedwagon after the birthday party the Joestars threw for him.

A story written for Speedwagon's birthday, as you can tell by now.

Happy belated 156th birthday, you sweet dork!! <3 (posted it on the 16th on Ao3 but forgot to bring it here orz)

* * * * *

Pairings: Jonathan/Erina /&/ Jonathan/Speedwagon

* * * * *

More details and the whole fic under the cut... (if Read Mores don’t work for you and you don’t want to see this post, feel free to block the ;long post tag)

Notes: The story is set in 1889, a little less than a year after the events in PB. It’s also an AU where Jonathan lives. Everything went down the same as in canon, save for the fact that Dio died in Windknight's Lot (or at least he hasn't come back since). Jonathan's and Erina's honeymoon went as smoothly as it should have. Jonathan is also now an archaeologist, working on his many different researches on Aztec culture mainly. The rest more or less remains the same as in canon, including Speedwagon being helplessly in love with Jonathan.

In this story (and any other of my stories involving the Ogre Street gang), the Kenpo Master will be referred to as Li. That's the name I've given him: Li Jiang. I also have this headcanon that "Tattoo" is not the red-head's name, but a nickname he adopted after getting that trademark tattoo on his face (his name being Stephen O’Moore, but he's still addressed as Tattoo most of the time for his own personal reasons anyway).

Fun fact I just realized while writing this story: Just like this year's (2019) Oct 16th fell on a Wednesday, 1889's Oct 16th also fell on a Wednesday (cue a loud OH MY GOD).

Warnings: There’s a depiction of tobacco smoking. There are also a few mentions/depictions of pregnancy, and the usual cursing our dear Robert has us used to. Also “mentions” of period-typical homophobia.

Soft chuckles and giggles could be heard coming from behind the closed doors of the tea room. A bit of a feat, considering how espacious the room was. Inside, two blondes comfortably sat in the large, cushioned, armchairs around the tea table, talking about all sorts of stuff over tea and pastries, filling each other in on the other’s news and sharing a laugh every now and then and just enjoying each other's company like they would normally do on evenings like this. It was getting late, and the time to say goodbye for the night was getting closer.

"I enjoyed spendin' this evenin' with you, Miss Joestar. As always, it was a wonderful one!"

"You don't have to keep up the formalities, Robert. We have been friends for how long now?" She made a brief pause. A rhetorical question that both knew didn't need an answer. "Just call me Erina." A kind smile graced her delicate features. He nodded, still feeling a bit inadequate to address any of the Joestars by their first names, but he couldn’t simply say no to them. "And, the feeling is mutual. It is always a pleasure to have you here. I just wish Jonathan could have been able to join us today."

"He's still workin' on that thesis, isn’t he?" A soft nod of her head was given in response.

"He says he is almost done with it. It is also due next week’s Monday, so he has had to work extra hours on it these past days." There's a sense of pride in her voice despite how much she wished she could have had more time to spend with him as of late.

"I'm completely sure 'is 'ard work 's gonna pay off." It always did. Jonathan was truly a hard working man, not only on the battlefield, but also in everything he did, always giving his all. Not to mention how passionate he was about his field.

"I have no doubts about it. Now, about that week’s Wednesday..."

"Oh. Please, don't burden yourself with that!" The man was quick to reply. "It 's nothin' special at all!"

"Come on. Don't be silly, Robert." The lady offered an even warmer smile and put her hand on top of Robert's as it rested on the table, giving it a soft and friendly squeeze. "It is all the opposite to 'nothing'. And it most certainly is special, too. And I'm completely sure Jonathan thinks so, too." Well, there was no arguing to that as Speedwagon could almost hear the brunet echoing his wife's words while giving Robert a pat to his shoulder. Still…

"But, Miss Joest–" Erina gave him a look and Robert tried again. "Ahh. Sorry... Erina. Blimey. It 's just, I... I wouldn't want t' impose and be a burden t’ any of you..."

"And you won't be. Never have been such, and I assure you that will not be the case either. Besides, this will be the first time we get to celebrate your birthday together, and I know Jonathan is just as excited as if this was his own birthday." She let out a soft chuckle, and she withdrew her hand, placing it this time on top of her pregnant belly. "And I can tell this little one is excited, too." Robert couldn't help a fond smile at all that. He certainly couldn't –and wouldn’t either– let any of the three down in any possible way. Not in this life or the next one (and every other lives that could come after that).

"Alrigh', but only if you're sure this 's not a hindrance t' you or Mister Jo–.... T' Jonathan."

"You have my word on that. Please, come visit us again for the date. And bring your friends, too. The maids will make sure everything is ready for the occasion. You don't have to worry about anything at all besides gracing us with your presence and having fun." She added with such a kind tone to her voice that it made it impossible for Speedwagon to add any "buts" to the conversation.

“I swear you two are too kind t’ me sometimes…”

“You deserve it.” She added with absolute honesty. “You have always done so much for us, and for Jonathan, mainly. It is the least we can do for you.”

“It’s nothin’ grand. I’m just doin’ my part on repayin’ Jojo for all ‘is kindness and everythin’ he’s done for me since we met.”

“You always make it sound like everything you do for us is insignificant, Robert, but I assure you it is not. We truly appreciate all of your actions. And I know you are so very special to Jonathan as much as he is to you.” Robert couldn’t help the blush that was now creeping up to his face, even though Erina voicing that sort of knowledge she had was not new by now. She had long ago found out about his true feelings for Jonathan, never having any issues with it at all.

Erina was fully aware of how easy it was to love Jonathan, and she also knew some of the story between Robert and him. She had also been perceptive enough to understand that there was something more to those apparent “codes” in Robert’s general appearance, which was far different from that of most gentlemen in England. That had been something Robert gladly explained for her as their friendship grew and both became more comfortable around each other, letting her know that, indeed, there was a meaning to them all, and that he had always had a liking for men. Whatever fear or worries he could have had until then about letting her know something as delicate as that faded away almost immediately after informing her of his situation as she never made any sorts of disgusting comments, nor gave him any weird looks nor treated him poorly, like many others would have probably done. All the opposite, all he ever got from her was sympathy without any kinds of judgement, and all her support.

And it never ceased, not even after he finally caved in, some time later, and admitted to her his undying feelings for Jonathan. It didn’t take her by surprise when he did, though. Then again, Robert had always had a tendency to be quite transparent about his feelings for the gentleman even when he tried not to. It had always been crystal clear that his admiration for him went far beyond a simple friendship, and that there was so much more that was still left unsaid. Something deeper. Something vastly more meaningful and everlasting. And she fully supported it.

“I will not take any attempts of refutals, Robert, and you know it.” She promptly added, not allowing him to downplay his own acts of love towards them but, mostly, towards Jonathan once more. The blond let out a soft whine, hoping the pink dusting his face would go away soon.

“You are mean, Erina…” He simply jested this time, leaning back into his chair.

“If that is what is going to take to make you understand just how special you are to us; how special you are to Jonathan, then I will be the meanest lady you will ever meet.” She said, her tone playful, but her words sincere. And Speedwagon could see that very well in her clear blue eyes.

“I truly do not deserve a friend like you.” A soft chuckle in the shape of a huff punctuated his words. He then picked up his cup of tea, sipping the last of it’s contents so he could take his leave.

“You are a wonderful man. You just haven’t realized it yet.”

“Wish I could believe that. I mean, it ‘s not that I doubt you or anythin’!! It ‘s just...” Robert averted his gaze, unconsciously letting his head hang a little. His tone sounded defeated, and Erina could tell the reason why.

“Jojo is fully aware of how wonderful you are, too. He just...” She sighed softly, unable to find the right words for it. “He can be a bit oblivious to the signs if you are not direct or clear enough with him sometimes. Especially at moments like this, when his mind is fully absorbed by something else.” Both remained in silence for a moment. Erina’s soft hand once more offering a reassuring touch to the back of Robert’s scarred one.

“I… know. I… I just wish I ‘ad the guts t’ finally be open with ‘im and just tell ‘im ‘ow I feel.” The man didn’t do much to lift his head, slipping his eyes closed for a moment instead. Erina could feel the muscles in Robert’s hand tensing up a little under her palm, right before he lifted his head. There was pain in his eyes. “I’m scared t’ death that he might find me disgustin’ and will not want t’ see me ever again.”

“Fear of rejection is the most normal thing to feel in this type of situations. The views most people have regarding people with ‘a different taste’ than the rest does not help much on that matter, but it does not mean everyone will turn against you, and I’m almost certain you know that very well after all the experiences you’ve had, and all the people you have met around the globe.” Her tone was soft, reassuring. Even with his lack of an interest in women, it was easy for Robert to see why Jojo loved her so much. “I’m afraid I don’t have the exact answer you are looking for, but I know in my heart that, no matter what, Jojo will never think any less of you.” The pain was still visible in his gaze, but he seemed to be a bit more at ease after hearing that.

“Thank you, Erina. You are an absolute saint.” The woman then shook her head, lightly.

“I beg to differ. I just want you two to be the happiest possible.”

“And you say you’re not a saint, eh…?” Both blondes shared a soft laugh and Erina withdrew her hand once more. “Well, looks like it ‘s time for me t’ go.” Speedwagon stood up from his seat. He straightened his waist coat and adjusted his frock coat before he picked his hat and put it on his head. Erina stood up as well.

“The carriage that will take you home is waiting for you.” To which Robert could only stare at her; his eyes widening a bit and his mouth slightly agape.

“What? Blimey, that won’t be necessary. I can just–”

“I told you before: I will not be taking any negative responses for an answer.” She cut him short with that gentle tone of hers and a matching smile.

“One day, I don’t know ‘ow, but one day I will repay you two for everythin’ you’ve done for me.”

“Until then, please, be kind and accept these small displays of gratitude of ours.” Truly, there was no way they could dislike each other.

It took Robert some effort to convince Erina not to walk him to the main entrance of the mansion, but he did it. He worried too much over her and her pregnancy sometimes. It was almost comical in an endearing way just how much Jonathan and him resembled each other on that matter. However, and all that aside, the truth was that Erina was in her 8th month of pregnancy, almost the 9th, so moving around freely and without getting easily tired was not as simple as before, so she had to take it easy, mostly for the baby’s sake.

Not long after saying their farewells for the night –and Robert saying farewell to little Jojo as well–, and after greeting the coachman that was going to take him home, Robert was finally on the carriage, leaving the Joestar state. As the place began to disappear behind them, one of Speedwagon's hands went up to the chest pocket of his coat. He could feel the squared shape of the envelope Erina had given him earlier that day, shortly after he’d arrived. It was a little letter Jonathan had left for him to make up for his absence that day. He hadn't read it yet, and he was completely sure nothing out of the ordinary was written in it, and yet…

"He really took some time outta 'is day t' write this for me, huh...?" He mused under his breath, and the sole thought made his heart flutter. He was so madly in love with that man it was almost unbelievable.

With that image of Jonathan, as busy as he was, taking some time for him and writing that letter with him in mind, still lingering in his head, Robert leaned back into the cushioned seat of the carriage. He wanted to read the contents of the letter, even if there was nothing more in it than Jojo’s heartfelt apologies for missing his visit and the promise of properly making up for it and seeing him next time, but he knew any attempts of actually reading it would be futile with the lack of proper lighting inside the carriage. He let out a sigh and took his hat off, placing it on the empty seat beside him. He made himself comfortable –as comfortable as a big, 5’11” tall man like him could get in a space like that– and tried to get some sleep.

＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊

About a week later, the same carriage was seen making it’s way back to Liverpool. This time, though, there were two more passengers travelling along. The trip, unlike last time, felt a lot shorter. Probably because this time Robert had his Ogre Street mates with him all along to kill some time. Or maybe because, this time, he knew what Jonathan had wanted to tell him in the letter.

Just as Robert had expected then, there had been nothing particularly grand in it. It had been full to the brim with sincere apologies and all as well filling him in on some of the news of his everyday and stuff about his most recent work. What had made him feel a bit too anxious in anticipation, though, had been a line that Jojo added near the end. Something about a big surprise. Of course, it was a bit too much of a stretch that that could mean… what Robert kind of thought (more like, wished) it could mean, and he knew it. But still, that didn’t make much to ease that feeling that was pooling in the pit of his stomach, and he felt kind of silly about it. Being so excited over something that was most likely not going to happen, was he even for real? He questioned himself over and over again since reading that letter the morning after he’d left the Joestar mansion days ago, and still did now as the three guests were led into the mansion by one of the butlers while another took their baggage to the designated rooms upstairs. The first butler then took them into the banquet hall, where their hosts were awaiting for them.

Even though this was not the first time Tattoo and Li visited the Joestar estate, that didn’t change much that feeling of inadequacy the three of them were always victims of whenever they visited. This place was so huge and imposing. Regardless of the kind nature of Jonathan and Erina, always making them feel welcome, it was near impossible for folks with much less fortunate backgrounds such as the three of them not to feel that way, like they were completely out of place. Never in their lives they would have imagined they would set foot into a majestic place like this unless they were raiding it...

The big double doors of the hall were pushed open by the butler guiding them through the mansion and he stepped aside, so the group could come in. The first thing Robert saw as he stepped into the room was Jonathan’s beautiful smile.

“Robert!” The younger man greeted, excited, waving his hand –manners and 100% proper and sober Victorian etiquette were still not his forte, huh– and rushed towards the newcomers. “You came! I was worried you wouldn’t!”

“There ‘s no way on Earth I’d ever let you down, Jonathan.” Robert took his hat off and offered a gentle smile of his own while secretly trying to hide the soft blush he felt was threatening to creep up to his cheeks at the sight of his favorite gentleman smiling so bright at him. The taller man then grabbed him by his shoulders in a gentle manner, showing just how excited he was to see him again after so long.

“I know, I know!! But still! I was just...worried, you know?” Jonathan rubbed his cheek a little before he loosened his grip and hugged the man instead. Something quite improper, especially between two men, but it was something that Speedwagon couldn't find any reasons to complain about. He returned the hug in a very similar manner, enjoying every second of it, unconsciously memorizing the smell of Jojo’s lotion mixed with his own flowery scent. A true delight to his sensitive nose. "I'm so happy that you're here." His voice was low as there was no need to raise it with how close they were from each other, Jonathan practically whispering those words into his ear. Robert felt his legs go a tad weak, but they didn't give in, mostly thanks to Jonathan’s strong but tender embrace. He knew Tattoo and Li were going to tease him on end about this later but, fuck it, he couldn't care less about that.

“And I am truly ‘appy t’ be ‘ere, you big sap.” He replied in a lighthearted way, adding that last bit in an attempt to play it cool and not completely give himself away, even though he was almost completely sure at this point that everyone in the room –save for the object of his affections, unfortunately– were well aware of the true nature of his feelings for Jonathan. The brunet finally pulled away from the hug and properly greeted Li and Tattoo as well, shaking hands with them and exchanging kind words and genuine smiles. Erina also came to greet them all, in a much more proper manner than her husband, but just as warm and kind as him. Those two were nothing at all like most other rich folks Speedwagon had ever met before.

“How’s little Jojo doin’ today?” Robert asked, his gaze falling down to Erina’s pregnant belly for a moment.

“Wonderfully!” She replied; her smile never fading away. “And quite excited, too. They have been kicking a lot today.”

“They are excited because they knew Uncle Speedwagon was coming today.” Jonathan added as he moved back to Erina’s side, draping an arm around her shoulders. That sweet smile of his in full display once more…

...And Robert couldn’t help the blush on his face. Not just at that beautiful sight, but at what Jonathan had just said.

“Uncle…?” He echoed, and the couple’s smiles grew wider and even warmer.

“That’s correct!” They both said almost in unison.

To think Erina and Jojo considered him good enough for such an important role in their child’s life… Lord, he felt so undeserving.

“I honestly don’t think I’m the most fit for the role, but I’ll ‘appily do my best t’ not disappoint any of you!” The smile gracing his features mirrored those on the couple’s faces in every possible way, showing just how touched he genuinely was. Having known Robert long before Jojo had come into his life, Li and Tattoo found it truly sweet to finally see him being this happy, and surrounded with so much love, even if not everything about it had been going the exact way their mate wished. They knew the kind of man he was underneath that tough and rough exterior he was very well known for in all of the slums, and knew how deserving he truly was of every single ounce of it. Both of them placed a hand on each of Speedwagon’s shoulders as a sign of that, smiling at him and at the Joestars as well, and the man returned the gesture with that genuine smile of his as well.

“We are so happy to hear you say that. Now, please, don’t stand there and come take a seat!” Erina added and walked over to the huge dining table. Jojo led them to it as well. Some of the maids had already come in and were already getting everything ready for the meal, bringing in the dishes for them all to enjoy.

“Hope you have a good appetite today!” Jojo exclaimed as he pulled the chairs out for their guests. “The staff worked hard on all this, so I hope the food is to your taste.” And he finally sat down as well once everyone was in their seats; the maids and butlers putting the many plates of hot food on the table before each one of them and getting everything ready for everyone to enjoy their meals. Once they all had finished their food, they all went outside and took a walk around the majestic gardens surrounding the mansion, enjoying the beautiful views and the still gentle breeze of the first month of Fall.

The reunion went down as smooth as expected so far: A shared high spirit, lots of fun and interesting stories about many different subjects shared by everyone, genuine laughter and smiles, incredibly tasty food (and many different dishes to sink their teeth into, too). A pleasant time they all deserved and had been looking forward to as well.

Low tea time then came, and they were all greeted in the tea room by a different part of the staff working at the mansion. Hot beverages, all sorts of delicious pastries, the perfect lighting. Everything was ready by the time they got there. Everyone took a seat and soon after, the tea was served.

“This ‘as been such a lovely day,” Robert finally said sometime later, visibly touched by the heartwarming gesture of the Joestar couple towards him and his old friends. It was hard to believe that, this exact day, one year ago, he had been spending the day in the streets, just wandering around aimlessly, killing time and causing trouble... “and I wanna thank you both for everythin’. I still don’t know what on Earth did I do so right t’ deserve you both in my life.”

“Just being yourself. That’s what you did.” Jonathan replied with that gentle smile of his aimed at the blond, who was sitting right beside him. Erina nodded. “I don’t think I’ve had the opportunity to say this before, but I think you already know it: You are one of the persons I admire the most. You are so very special, Robert. And I hope you haven't forgotten about the surprise I mentioned in the letter." Jonathan's words, as usual, didn't fail to paint the blond’s cheeks a sweet tone of pink that, hopefully, was not easy to notice. And, the reminder of the letter only served to make that blush last a little longer.

Jojo stood up and walked over to one of the cabinets in the room. From one of the drawers, he pulled something out, something he had previously put in there himself for this moment, and asked Robert to come over, which he did. Everyone's eyes followed them, curious as to what Jonathan had gotten him. Not even Erina knew, as Jonathan had insisted all the time that it was a surprise. Meanwhile, Robert was inwardly pleading for his heart to stop pounding so hard in his chest. Once he was before Jonathan, he was presented with a light-gray small box –though it could very well just be that anything looked small in Jonathan's hands–. It was a bit flat and there was a lavender ribbon on top of it. He nodded, encouraging Robert to open his present right away.

"I hope you like it." The nobleman added, expectant for the other's reaction, watching him open the box, revealing an elegant sterling silver pocket watch –a hunter-case one–, attached to a silver chain. The thing looked so expensive it felt so alien in Robert's hand.

"Jojo, you didn't–"

"I know I didn't have to, but I wanted to." He finished his sentence with a kind smile. "You deserve so much more than this, but I hope you like it nevertheless!"

"Are you kiddin' me? I love it!" He beamed. And he wasn’t lying. He did love it, but not because of how fancy and nice it looked. It was because it was a present from the man he loved so dearly. He could have gotten some cheap trinket from him and his reaction would have been entirely the same.

"I'm so happy to hear that! And there's one more thing. Take a look inside." His index finger pointing at the watch. Robert did as requested and carefully opened it. On the back of the lid there was a set of numbers engraved, written in beautiful cursive. It was… a date?

"Jonathan. This ‘s...?" Jonathan nodded.

"The date of the day we met for the first time." And Robert froze on the spot. Of course, there was the ‘embarrassing’ part attached to the memory –that of Tattoo, Li and him trying to gut Jonathan alive while the young man had been doing nothing but seeking for an antidote to save his Father’s life, something that the three ruffians still felt terrible about–, but there was also a unique feeling to it, as that had also been the day that this man had come into his life, ready to change everything in it for good: His views, his wrecked and reckless ways, his life style and the way he perceived life and the world around him, the way he perceived himself, showing him that he was worth something, showing him that there was so much more to life than what that little underworld in the slums had to offer. The day he had so fiercely fallen for this ‘rich boy’ that was nothing like the rest, the one who was a true gentleman in every possible way. The one that had captivated his heart like no other had and that Robert was absolutely convinced was the one and only love of his life.

The blond couldn’t find any words to say. He was genuinely speechless, with his gaze fixed on the engraving for a little longer as the memories and the swirl of emotions engulfed him whole. It was such a ‘small’ detail, but one that meant the world to him, as it showed and left no doubts about Robert’s importance in Jonathan’s life. The moment he raised his gaze, meeting Jojo’s, his eyes were visibly glassy, and that was something that didn’t escape Jonathan. He didn’t make any comments on it, though, figuring it would make Speedwagon feel uncomfortable and exposed so, instead, he pulled him into a tight hug.

“Happy Birthday, Robert.” He said in a soft voice. Speedwagon leaned into the hug, wrapping his arms around Jojo’s larger frame.

“Thank you… Jojo…” He replied in a similar manner, trying his best to choke down his tears, and doing a fairly decent job at it. When the hug ended, they both went back to the table and enjoyed the rest of the evening along with the rest of their friends and family. Outside, the night had fallen over the vast Liverpool skies.

Ever since this celebration had been planned, it had been agreed by all of them that Robert, Li and Tattoo were staying over for a few days after that. There were plenty of guest rooms in the mansion, so having them over would definitely be no issue at all. Since they weren’t going back to London tonight, there was also no need to rush anything, and so conversations and all sorts of activities went on for a while longer than they usually would on a regular visit. Time went fast by, and it was getting really late. They were all tired after such a long and fun day, so everyone went to their respective bedrooms, ready to call it a day.

“Erina, dear.” Jojo called once they were alone in their room. Something seemed to be bothering him.

“Yes?”

“…It might just be me but, did you notice anything different in Robert later today?”

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t know how to describe it, but it felt like…”

“Like something was off?” She looked at him; her soft hands rested on her belly as she remained sitting on the edge of their bed.

“Yes. Yes, something like that.” He said after a moment of pondering about it. “Do you know what it could possibly be? I don’t recall him mentioning any issues before or anything that could be bothering him.” He inquired, hoping she would know something he didn’t and could tell him about. Maybe the two of them had talked about something that could be troubling him during his previous visit?

Erina let out a soft sigh and lightly shook her head.

“Oh, Jojo.” She looked into her husband’s eyes. Even through the dim light from the oil lamp on the nightstand he could see that look she would always give him whenever he was missing something important that was a bit obvious. It wasn’t a condescending look at all. All the opposite, really. “You have not noticed it yet, have you?”

And her words threw him off. Completely.

“Notice...what?”

“I could tell you, but I think it would be best for you, and for Robert, that you find that answer out for yourself, dear.”

Jonathan continued staring at her; his thick brows knitted together. He was infinitely puzzled still. She stood up and walked towards him. She cupped his face in her hands and gently pulled him closer, pressing a soft kiss to his cheek.

“Look. I won’t mind if you want to go and talk with him. Knowing him, I’m sure he is going to be up for a while longer, and I’m convinced he will appreciate your company through the night.” Which was something both knew for sure. It was no secret that Speedwagon was a night owl, and him staying over at someone’s place probably wouldn’t change that the slightest. Jonathan nodded. He then kissed Erina in return before he left.

Meanwhile, a few doors down the hall, in his room, Robert was leaning against the door frame that led to the balcony. He had already taken his coat and waistcoat off, both of which he had left on the footboard of the four poster bed. The turmoil inside his head (and heart) had gotten considerably worse as hours had ticked away, so he had opted for making himself comfortable –as comfortable as one could in that condition– and take a breath of fresh air while, a bit ironically, having a smoke, hoping that would soothe him enough so he could get some sleep later that night. He lit a cigarette and stared outside, softly humming to a tune he had heard some time ago, when he visited the Caribbean. His room had quite a nice view of the gardens their whole group had walked through earlier. They looked so different under the moonlight, but still as beautiful as before. It was a really nice change from the urban landscapes he was so used to back in London. He remained like that for a moment, enjoying the chilly but gentle wind of Fall. His tie was undone, and his shirt was open, allowing that chilly wind to gently brush against the exposed skin of his scarred chest. He put the cigarette between his lips and slipped a hand into the pocket of his trousers, producing the silver pocket watch Jonathan had given him earlier, idly fiddling with it and running his fingers over the smooth surface as he took a drag of his cigarette. His gaze was fixed on the timepiece now and he could see the way the moonlight shone so beautiful on it’s surface. His mind, suddenly, decided to go back to earlier that day, to that moment when Jonathan had hugged him for the second time, and he felt that rush of emotions strike him all over again.

“You’re such a bloody fool, Robert…” He whispered to himself. Being so madly in love with a nobleman. And not just that, but a married gentleman. His friend’s husband at that. And, while said friend was absolutely okay with those tender feelings he had for him, and even encouraged him to take the next step whenever he felt ready for it, if he ever did, he still felt so silly about it all. He had no leads that Jonathan was… well, like that. No leads or hints that he had somewhat of a taste for men, like an invert man such as Robert did. And not just that, but he was also scared to death of not only being rejected by the man he loved, but he was also scared of being seen by him as nothing but a disgusting pervert as well. The sole idea of Jonathan telling him that he didn’t want anything to do with him anymore was frightening and painful enough to make the former thug want to keep his mouth and heart shut as much as he could, as much as it hurt. He’d rather remain a close friend and be by his side always, until the very end, than risk losing him forever…

A soft knock on his room’s door echoed through the room, dragging him back to the present time.

“C’mon in.” Speedwagon raised his voice enough for the visitor to hear and slipped the watch back into his pocket. He looked over his shoulder when he heard the door open and then click shut a second later. Even in the darkness that was engulfing the room now that the oil lamps were off, he could still make out the huge silhouette of the Joestar heir walking towards him. The blond turned on his heels, failing to realize just how ‘improper’ he must have been looking at the time (etiquette wasn’t always his forte, especially with an upbringing like his and the fact that he was still a man from the worst part of the slums). “Oi, Jojo.” He greeted, raising his hand a little.

“H-Hey.” He said once he got to Speedwagon’s side, mirroring that gesture.

“I thought you were with Erina. ‘s somethin’ the matter?” He asked, genuinely curious, and even a tad worried.

“No, no. Everything is fine! I mean, not everything, but yes. Just...”

“Are you sure? ‘cause this ‘s definitely not like you.” His concern growing deeper. “Do you need t’ talk, perhaps?”

“Yeah, I guess...” His voice trailed off. He looked, and sounded, so lost for a moment. Robert had no clue what this was all about, but he was going to try his best to be of aid. “It’s about earlier…”

Oh…

“Yeah…? What ‘bout it?”

“I couldn’t help but notice that something was kind of, well, off with you…”

“...”

“Erina noticed it, too. I tried to ask her about it. She seems to know something, but she wouldn’t tell me anything. She said it would be best for us to talk.”

Robert couldn’t help a soft chuckle, exhaling a bit of smoke in the process.

“Don’t get me wrong for what I’m ‘bout t’ say, please, but that woman ‘s an absolute angel. I can truly see why you love ‘er so much.” He admitted as he looked away into the horizon once more. Jonathan smiled in response, finding no fails or lies in that whole statement about his sweet Erina. His gaze followed Robert’s and, after a moment of silence and even a little of hesitation, he tried again.

“So…? Something’s been bothering you…?” He asked cautiously, not wishing to upset Speedwagon in any possible way. The blond hesitated to respond, taking a couple seconds to think, and re-think, his answer. He suddenly felt cold, as if his blood had been drained from his body, and a chill ran down his spine as realization fell down on him. There was no turning back now, was it?

“...It ‘s not like there’s somethin’ botherin’ me per se… It s just… somethin’ else. Somethin’ that’s been goin’ on for quite a long time now and that I, shamefully, ‘aven’t had the ballocks t’ be frank ‘bout it.” He admitted, unconsciously taking another drag of his cigarette before putting it off on the ashtray that was sitting on top of the bureau by the door. Jonathan’s face was colored in concern after hearing those words. It had to be something quite undesirable if it had lasted for so long while also making Speedwagon want to keep his mouth shut on the matter all this time, he figured.

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner about it?” His voice reflecting that same concern that was plastered all over his face. “I would have helped you out as soon as you told me!” There was a tinge of pain in Robert’s features, and the moonlight made sure Jonathan didn’t miss that as the shorter man turned to look at him.

“Haven’t you noticed it yet, Jojo...?” The brunet remained silent, trying to piece it all together.

“I…” He stammered. Robert gulped hard and locked eyes with him. It was now or never, right? Right.

“I love you.”

“What…?”

“You ‘eard me right!” He nearly shouted. “I love you, Jonathan…! I love you so damn much! And I always ‘ave ever since you came into my life all that time ago...” He said, trying to keep himself collected as much as he could. His fists were clenched into tight balls at his sides while hot tears threatened him, stinging his eyes. Jojo stared at him, wide eyed, and at a complete loss for words. “I’d been keepin’ that t' myself all this time ‘cause… ‘cause I was scared t’ death of losin’ you. I still am!” He took a deep breathe. It was still hard for Robert to conceive that a ruthless gang leader such as himself could be this vulnerable before someone else, but here he was, exposing himself once more, though in a completely open manner this time for a change, confessing all those feelings he had tried so hard to keep to himself. “I don’t expect you t’ return my feelings. Bloody ‘ell, I will even understand if you don’t wanna see my disgustin’ arse ever again, and I promise I will never show m’self ‘round ‘ere anymore! I just… I just… really ‘ad t’ let all this out somehow before it ate me alive whole...” The pain was almost tangible in his voice as he uttered all those words.

And, suddenly, all those signs Jonathan had seen countless times coming from him before made so much sense. So much more that he couldn’t help but feel so inept, and like the biggest fool around for being so painfully oblivious to it all while even Erina had noticed it so long ago but, also, for having forced himself to keep his own feelings towards this man before him locked away…

“I’m...sorry for disappointin’ you and not bein’ who you thought I was, Mister Joestar…” He spoke again, even shaking a little, and he lowered his eyes, bringing back the formalities now that his chances of being on the list of undesirable people in this household had increased exponentially...

...Or so he thought.

“What on Earth are you talking about!?” The younger male grabbed him by the shoulders, making him raise his head and look back into Jojo’s face. There was a glint of something in his eyes. Something that Speedwagon could not quite read at first but that seemed like… pain? He had no time to ponder too much about it as Jonathan immediately pulled him into yet another tight hug, though, this time he was holding on to him like his very life depended on it, yet careful not to crush him in the process. “There is no way you could ever disappoint me!!” He sounded hurt, and he legitimately was. “The only one I am disappointed with is myself for being so blind and not being able to return your feelings sooner…” He paused, trying to find the right words to voice what was going on through his mind. “...I think I’d known about it all for a bit. I just… didn’t say anything for that same reason: I was afraid of being wrong in my assumptions and losing you forever! And, also, Erina… I… I didn’t know how she would react to the news that I had a special fondness for you, a special fondness as intense as that I have for her, and I didn’t want to make her feel like I didn’t love her anymore, much less now that she is carrying our baby.” The brunet tightened the hug a little; his fingers gently digging into the fabric of Robert’s shirt as he finally opened up, his hot tears rolling down and soaking Robert’s shirt. There was nothing but absolute honesty in his every word, and Robert could easily notice that. “I was so confused because I love her so much, and never have stopped loving her either. At first I was not aware that it was possible to love two different persons in the same manner, and so fiercely, at the same time. It… It took me a while to figure that out on my own and, still, I decided to keep quiet about it because I didn’t know how to bring it up to her, and how to bring it up to you as well. I tried to convince myself that… all of this, all those signs you gave off… as well as everything I was feeling… that it was all in my head. Guess I only made a fool out of myself in the end, didn’t I?”

Robert pulled Jojo away just enough so they could make eye contact once more. It broke his heart to see his gentleman break down like this.

“Jojo... dear. Lord…” He struggled to find the right words to say and could feel his own tears finally rolling down his face. There was so much in what Jonathan had just said that he could relate to in his own way... “You ‘aven’t done anythin’ wrong! Besides… It 's also my fault that you didn’t know for sure just ‘ow much I’ve always loved you until now! And I’m really sorry ‘bout that… I really wish I ‘ad the guts t’ be open with you ‘bout that sooner instead of tryin’ t’ hide it all and pretend nothin’ else was goin’ on...” Both men, remained in silence for a moment, still close to each other. It was then that Jonathan spoke once more.

“I guess… that makes both of us a pair of fools…”

“The biggest of ‘em all, I’m afraid…” Both of them shared a soft laugh despite those tears still wetting their faces; their foreheads pressed together as they did. One of Jojo’s hands went up to tenderly cup Speedwagon’s chin with his thumb and index finger.

“Robert… May I…?”

“Goddamnit, Jojo…” Robert let out a soft huff and cupped Jonathan’s face in his hands; his little smile not fading away the slightest. “Just fuckin’ kiss me…!”

Jonathan tilted Robert’s face slightly to the side, allowing himself a better access. His other hand went to rest on the small of the blond’s back, and he finally pressed their lips together in a long awaited kiss that Robert gladly returned in the same loving manner, both of them pouring into it all those feelings they had been holding back for so long.

They remained in each other’s arms for a little longer after the kiss ended, refusing to let go just like that.

“Would you… stay with me tonight? I mean, only if you think Erina will be alrigh’ with that. I wouldn’t wanna get on ‘er bad side ever.” Robert whispered as he rested his head on Jonathan’s chest. He could hear the soft rumble that was his chuckle. They both knew very well that Erina could be quite scary when she wished to.

“That will be completely alright.” He said with a full smile on his face. “We should go inside, though. It’s getting colder, and I don’t want you to catch a cold or worse!”

“This is nothin’ compared t’ what Ogre Street ‘as me used to, darlin’.”

“Yeah, I suppose so, but... About that, I know that you along with Tattoo and Li have turned down the offer of moving in with us countless times already, but I must insist once more.”

“I told you, dear, we don’t wanna be a nuisance t’ either of you.”

“But you wouldn’t be! Besides… I want. No, I need Erina and you, my two loves, by my side.” Speedwagon let out yet another soft chuckle.

“Blimey... You’re really the biggest daisy I’ve ever met, Jonathan.” He said fondly, “But I will gladly take you up on that this time. Little Jojo might need their Uncle ‘round when they arrive, and I’m sure Erina might appreciate some friendly company as well. And, much like yourself...” He stood on his tiptoes, gently bringing Jojo’s face down by his chin a little. “...I also need my one true love by my side.” His voice soft, sealing those words with yet another kiss under the pale moonlight.

Final notes: This story took so long for me to get it done from start to end, but it's finally here!

This is, I think, the first time I actually write something for the lovely jonaeri/jonawagon ot3~ :'D I also loved writing those bits with Robert and Erina together. They were super fun, and I also loved the idea of Robert happily telling her about the gay codes from that time and just kind of getting her into that little secret world, not only because Erina is the ultimate ally, but also, because, given the taboos in Victorian England, it's pretty much a given that Robert usually had to keep a lot of things from most people, sometimes friends included, so he really appreciates those time whenever he's allowed to be himself and is able to share some of that with others. Needless to say how much I love writing jonawagon and putting them in sweet and cozy scenes~

I can honestly say I'm pleased with how this story turned out, but I would definitely love to hear your thoughts on it!

Feedback, likes, reblogs and everything else (shares outside of Tumblr and Ao3, too) are always encouraged and highly appreciated!!

Thanks for reading!

[ddp456]

A Little Lumberjane Christmas - A Gravity Falls Christmas Story/Poem (Re-post)

Hey, all!  @ddp456​ here, and due to the season, I wanted to re-share one of my favorite creations to spread some holiday cheer.  I changed the format a bit, hopefully making it a bit more readable on Tumblr than the original versions here and here.  Again, happy holidays, and please enjoy!

-------------------------------------------------------------

Written by @ddp456​ Illustrations by @codylabs​ Based on an idea by Wolf90

-------------------------------------------------------------

It was Christmas Eve and time to deck the halls, in the podunk town called Gravity Falls. Weirdmageddon had pass, its horrors thankfully gone, bringing peace back to the sleepy state of Oregon.

Its natural weirdness seemed to had taken a pause, as the whole town awaited the arrival of ol' Santa Claus. Stockings were hung and trees were dressed really bright. From a distance, the whole town looked like a giant Christmas light.

Families were brought together, and friends would come and unite, proving enough Christmas cheer can make anything right. But one unfortunate soul didn't see things that way. She sat on a rooftop, watching nightfall rise up from the passing day. Who was this person, seemingly unaffected by Christmas joy? Why, it's the Lumberjack Princess, Wendy Corduroy!

Wendy hidden herself away at the top of the Mystery Shack, as the brutal winter winds blew away at her back. She didn't mind the cold, save for the tips of her boot-covered toes, and the feeling of frost nipping away at her stubby little nose. Wendy wanted a safe place to brood and mope and think, as she sipped from a thermos of hot cocoa, her favorite winter drink.

She had gotten out of her dad's apocalypse training by lying about work. She avoided Soos's Mystery Shack staff party by saying it wasn't her quirk. The rest of the town was swept away in the Christmas action, as McGucket threw a huge celebration in what was once the Northwest Mansion. Her friends Tambry, Lee, Nate, and Thompson begged her to come. Wendy refused. "No thanks. It sounds kinda dumb."

Even the Pines twins made their own attempt. An offered trip to Piedmont, California only added to Wendy's contempt. Wendy turned down their invitation, hoping Mabel and Dipper wouldn't shed a tear. "Sorry, guys. Maybe we'll see next year."

All Wendy wanted was to be left alone with her pain. Why did the world make it feel like she was insane? To her loved ones, she didn't want to seem like a grouch, but because of all the lies she told, Wendy couldn't even go back to her own couch.

Wendy's wandering mind instantly came to a halt, as she could hear crushed snow beneath a heavy foot fault. She sprang into action, her ninja-like moves were so slick. Wendy couldn't believe her eyes, "Holy crap! It's St. Nick!"

Santa Claus stood before Wendy in all his glory. The red outfit and fuzzy beard definitely matched the often-heard stories. Despite her older age, Wendy didn't doubt her own eyes. After all, this was Gravity Falls, where the weirdos loved to hide!

Wendy asked, "Santa, no offense, but what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be posing on soda cans with a cute polar bear? Don't you have, like, a zillion presents to give out today? I won't bother you. You can be on your way!"

Santa laughed. "You need not worry. My deeds with get their well due. But tonight, dearest Wendy, I've come to speak with you. It makes Santa sad to see you so blue. Your Christmas spirit I intend to renew. So, come join me this night. Give me a chance to help make things right. By Christmas Morn, I make this promise so true, your outlook on Christmas will gain a new view."

"Thanks for the invite, Santa." Wendy scoffed at the plan so bland. She sat back down in the snow, "But, yeah, a hard pass from me, my man."

With her back turned, Wendy was definitely out of range, to see "Jolly ol' St. Nick" undergo a sudden change. His famous smile faded into a frown turned amiss, as his opened, gloved hands turned into enraged fists.

"Young lady," Santa said without as much as raising his voice. "I'm afraid you don't understand. I'm not giving you a choice."

"WHA – "

Before she knew it, Wendy was tackled to the ground, She punched, scratched, and kicked, but in the end, was helplessly bound. Left in a hogtie, Wendy could only look around, the identity of her attackers made her let out a disgusted sound. "The gnomes from the woods?! This can't be right! Why are you bugging me on Christmas Eve night? And what's the deal with the elf uniforms? What's your beef? I thought you reformed?"

Jeff the gnome stepped up, since the other gnomes weren't very social. "Sorry, kid. It's just business. I swear this isn't personal. We gnomes need extra scratch for these long winter seasons, and the big man likes to outsource. Need there be a better reason?"

"HO HO HO! Well done, my boys!" Santa heaved with huge amounts of joy. "Please place Miss Corduroy in my big sack of toys! For a job well done, expect a little extra in your checks. Consider it a gracious extension of my respect."

The gnomes cheered as they started to drag Wendy away. Their redheaded captive did everything she could to stay. She pulled and tugged and screamed with all of her might, but the ropes holding her were simply way too tight.

"You can't do this to me!" Wendy yelled. "I have rights! What's the matter, Santa? Too scared to fight your own fights? You know against me, you'd have no such luck! For the last time, let me go, ya fat fu – MMPH!"

The angry ginger's potty mouth was hurting the simple gnomes' brains, so they decided to gag her with a candy cane. From her lips, Wendy couldn't get the sticky treat to waver. The only positive in all this was that it was mint-flavored.

They tossed Wendy into the oversized bag, usually filled with cheer. She let out a muffled cry, landing hard on her derriere. The sack's top was then tied off, robbing Wendy of all light, as Santa and prisoner sailed away well into the night.

Hours felt like seconds until the sack's top was undone. Wendy sprang up from the bag. This was her chance to run! Her ropes and candy cane gag had disappeared. The road in front of her had been perfectly cleared. Before Wendy could take one step, a sturdy hand clamped onto her shoulder. She turned to find Santa, about two seconds away from scolding her.

"Welcome, Wendy," he greeted, "to my humble abode. I wouldn't bother fleeing, for there's nowhere to go. We're at the North Pole, far away from civilization. This is my workshop. Call it my own private nation. Your cell phone won't work. All internet access is password-protected. My best advice is for you to do what you're directed. Now, join me, won't you? The next room is pretty fine. I really want you to see my toy assembly line."

Wendy sighed. There wasn't anything she could do. What if Santa's words were absolutely true? The best course of action was to play along with the part, and trick the geezer that she had a change of heart. The two walked down and across a large loading bay while Santa's nine reindeer happily ate their servings of hay.

Santa led Wendy to the toy assembly line, when the annoyed teen let out a whine. "I don't mean to be rude, but I'm telling you, I can't stay. Can't you just leave coal in my stocking, and send me on my way?"

"HO-HO-HO!" Santa chuckled. "Why, Wendy, you're such a kidder! You can't lie to Santa. I must insist you reconsider. I know alone in the dead of winter is what you'd prefer. But in this case, I really cannot concur. There are reasons to my seemingly harsh way. I promise you'll reflect fondly on it one day.

Wendy crossed her arms and stuck out her tongue. "I really doubt that, you kidnapping pile of cow dung!"

Santa beaded his eyes, as he tried to stay reserved. "Maybe it's time to get what you deserve. With that negative attitude of yours – and your bad behavior. Santa's got the way to curb that. How about some hard labor?!"

With a hard push, Wendy nearly crashed into the conveyor belt. She looked around to see the hand she'd been dealt. An army of elves stood neatly in line, they slaved and worked tirelessly to finish their projects in time. An endless supply of toys, games, and electronics flew by at frenzied rates, to order to reach children in every country, province, and state.

"Whoa!" Wendy noticed. "Those aren't the gnomes. These elves are real!" "Of course they are," Santa prided. "Back home, this job needs the real deal! Who else could deliver such gifts with speed and joy? They pull out all the stops so each child gets a toy. These wondrous folks are able to look past their own wants and needs, to bring Christmas cheer by doing good deeds. Such is the lesson I expect you to learn tonight. So, jump right in and help, and please don't put up a fight!"

Wendy stepped up to the belt, finding that she was way too tall. "Hey, how can I help? These tools were made for someone super small!"

"Hmm…" Santa stroked his beard. "By George, you're right! Why didn't I see it before?" The old man snapped his fingers. "There! Now, you can easily do your chore!"

With a blink of her eye, Wendy had shrunk by half. She was horrified to see that she barely reached Santa's calf. Her lumberjack outfit and thick winter coat, were now a dorky, striped one piece, and curled shoes that looked like boats. Dipper's pine-tree cap became a cute matching hat with bell tips. Her long copper hair turned pigtails made her lose her grip.

"AHH!" Wendy shrieked as she felt her now-pointed ears. "Change me back!" She demanded. "Don't think I can't kick your chunky rear!"

Santa used one hand to hold back the pint-sized, fist-swinging threat. "Oh, give it up, kid. Just look at me! I'm not even breaking a sweat! All this protesting is really getting you nowhere. Help the elves with the toys, and I'll think about changing you back. I swear. Only when your Christmas spirit is revived, will you be allowed to go home. I'll leave you be now. Santa's got better things to do than listen to you drone."

Santa took his leave, when he stopped after a few paces. "I hate to do this to you, but to be honest, I'm really too old for chases." He snapped his fingers once more, the room echoed with a click. Wendy looked down, "What's this? Another one of your tricks?"

A metal tether was placed around her ankle, meant to hold her in place. Wendy couldn't run away or jump. She could barely walk around or pace. "You think you got me, old man?" Wendy bragged. "I'll be outta here super-quick." She reached under her hat, "As soon as I find my lock – "

"Looking for these?"

Santa flashed a grin, displaying Wendy's trusty lockpicks in his hand. "That's right, kiddo. Santa knows all your secrets. That's why he's the man!" Wendy was left speechless as her captor soon disappeared from sight. She pulled on her chain with all her might. The freckled elf tugged and yanked and fought against the shackle, but every escape attempt resulted in a painful ankle tackle.

Now faced with no other choice, Wendy turned around to accept her fate. She grabbed a toy off the assembly line and followed alongside with her elven mates. But after a few minutes, Wendy found the task to be a bore. She elbowed the nearest working elf neighbor, "So, what are you in for?"

The tiny elf stared at Wendy in a confused state. "I don't think you understand. We elves choose our own fate. We each have free will. Santa doesn't force us to stay. All of us volunteer here. We don't even ask for any pay!"

Wendy looked around at the other elves workers walking around scot-free. She was the only one chained down to the heavy machinery.

"Then, I don't get it." Wendy asked. "Why do you do all this?" The elf replied, "Because the end result is truly pure bliss. Seeing the happy, smiling faces of the grateful girls and boys, it's what powers our great quest. It brings us great joy!"

Wendy grew more curious. "But how can you see all of these things? There's too many to see and they're so far away. Are you just pulling my strings?"

"Watch…"

Wendy grew silent as from the assembly wall came something new. From a small crack, some kind of electrical portal grew. The portal shifted from different planes into a whole new world. Before Wendy's emerald eyes, did the elf's story unfurled.

A little girl knelt on the side of her bed, praying to the powers that be to watch over her loved ones' heads.

"That's little Clara," introduced Wendy's new friend. "She volunteers to take care of her grandma, helping around the house to no end. Even though her family has little money for presents, she gives them little grief. For this, we're giving her a special dollie to provide her some well-needed relief."

A new item flew down the conveyor belt at rocket speeds. Dozens of elven hands rushed to give it the details it needs. A blonde, huggable doll was the final result. Its design was truly perfect. There wasn't anything possible to insult. It flew off the line and into Santa's bag in an almost magical way, and soon, into Clara's awaiting arms on Christmas Day.

"I have to admit," Wendy's mood began to lighten. "That was really neat." She no longer felt like fighting.

"Then, why don't you give it a shot," the elf did suggest. "You're part elf now. You can do it. Try your best!"

Wendy began to picture a child in need, someone who was indeed worthy of the elves' creed. She opened her eyes and gasped aloud, as Wendy was soon presented with her very own cloud. The other elves murmured and gathered around, to see what child Wendy's mind had found.

The image became clear, displaying a teenage boy in punk clothing. His hair was blue. His jeans were torn and holey. But man, was his attitude loathing. The teen was with his mother, doing some late holiday shopping. But to Wendy's shock, she could make out some swears dropping. "No, Mom, you moron! What were you thinking? Are you always this dumb, or have you been possibly drinking? I said I wanted Super Linguini Bros. 3, not Part 2! Man, I honestly can't believe I'm related to you!"

As the image in the portal faded away, Wendy's blood boiled, perhaps more than anytime that day. The boy's expected present had appeared before her, half-finished. But her budding Christmas spirit had been quickly diminished. She picked up the video game machine, and threw it over her shoulder. Wendy let out a chuckle as her insight became ever bolder. All of the elves were shocked and frozen in pause, as the now-wrecked toy landed at the feet of Santa Claus.

Wendy spun around in horror. She knew an apology would be way too late. This latest outburst would surely seal her fate.

Instead, he approached Wendy without a sign of anger and rage. Santa rubbed his bearded chin, knowing he had to take from another page. "Maybe I'm going about this the wrong way. We need to go inside to find why you despise Christmas Day."

He stepped up to Wendy, who was still stuck in place, and placed his black glove over her freckled face.

"What are you doing?" She tried to pull away. "Stop being a creep! Get your stinking hand off me! I can't see a peep!"

Santa removed his hand, and Wendy was now filled with a sense of dread. She had been warped to a dark room with a yellow light hanging ahead. "Hello?" Wendy called out, no longer shackled. "Is anyone there?" "Sorry!" A new voice answered. "I'm on my way. I had to finish my hair!"

A purple and pink glow invaded the darkened space. Wendy entered a fighting stance, just in case. The small ball became a pixie, straight out of a fable. "Weird." Wendy noted. "You kinda look like my friend, Mabel."

The brunette fairy gave off a familiar smile, "Hey, there! Welcome! I hope you stay awhile. Beyond this point, lie the doors three. They represent Christmas Past, Present, and Future. Yippee! Each door will take you to a different point in time on Christmas Day. By journey's end, we'll learn the real reason of why you feel this way."

Wendy shrugged, "It isn't like I have any choice." The pixie agreed and waved, "No, not really. Just follow my voice! If you need anything, I'll be your busy bee! All you need to do is shout, "Hey, Christmas Fairy!""

The fairy led Wendy to the door labelled, "Christmas Past." She opened the door, "Come on! This will be a blast!" Wendy was reluctant, but did what the sprite asked. The redhead couldn't believe it! She was now ten years in the past!

They stood in a better version of the Corduroy household, one that hadn't been yet damaged by Manly Dan's tantrums left uncontrolled. In the farthest corner of a somewhat messy kitchen, a super-tall, redheaded woman baked cookies as her pigtailed daughter pitched-in. The child was covered in white flour from head and toe, and her chubby, little fingers were caked in sticky dough. But the deed was finally done. Into the oven, the cookies went in. The mother tightly hugged her baby, looking over her proudly with a grin. "I'm so proud of you, my little one. You perfectly made my recipe: Chocolate-frosted Christmas trees with just a pinch of sesame. One day, you'll be able to do it alone. Maybe to impress some lucky boy, or when you have a family of your own, my dearest Wendy Corduroy."

The little girl held her mother even tighter, her hidden anxiety and social fears became a tad bit lighter.

"Mama…"

The Christmas Fairy watched the heartwarming scene with glee. "How adorable!" She turned around, finding something unexpectedly. Wendy had turned away from the memory, as she hugged her own shoulders. "Can we get out of here, please? This all is getting older and older."

The pixie sighed, as she waved the memory away. "Maybe we can find something even better here in present day." Wendy followed the fairy to the next Christmas door, "Are we almost done? I'm not gonna lie. This is becoming a chore."

The fairy reached the large door, marked with label, "Present," so that Wendy could bear witness to ongoing Christmas events. This time, she was presented with not one window, or two, but three! On her left side, Wendy could make out a familiar, half-broken Christmas tree. The Gift Shop of the Mystery Shack was decorated with green and red. A nearby buffet table held quite an awesome spread!

The new Mr. Mystery, Soos, stood at the counter with elbows resting. His saddened face was downright depressing. Melody, his girlfriend and partner at the Mystery Shack, suddenly snuck behind him and gave him a hug-attack. "Hey, why so glum, big guy?" she wondered. "Gee, Melody." Soos lamented. "This party was nothing but a blunder. Everybody went to that McGucket shindig instead. With the way things are going, maybe I should have stayed in bed. Even Wendy, who works here, couldn't even bother to attend, Let's face it, this idea was nothing but a dead end."

Melody lowered her head against Soos's shoulder fat, "Oh, don't be silly. Just you forget about that! They can have their stupid party. Let them be. We'll have our own little Christmas; just you and me! And don't mind Wendy. You know she doesn't mean to hurt you. Besides, with us alone, we can make our Christmas a bit more "blue.""

The couple's lips met as they shared a Christmas kiss, though Wendy turned her head and quickly dismissed. "Okay! Moving on!" She fled the scene with swift feet, though she secretly thought the moment was sorta sweet.

The middle window allowed Wendy to view the snow-covered woods, as four burly soldiers followed a path, their heads covered in hoods. Wendy easily recognized those running around in the dead of winter making noise, It was her father, Manly Dan, and her brothers, the Corduroy boys!

Marcus, Kevin, and Gus followed along with dear old Dad, "Keep going!" Dan barked. "Onwards, my beefy lads! Those monsters this summer were only the beginning! We'll practice and train day and night to make sure we keep winning!"

The youngest boy, Gus, started to complain, "How'd Wendy get out of this? She's totally to blame! She said she couldn't come because of work? Yeah, right! She's full of it! What a jerk!"

It was then when Manly Dan came to a stop. The boys crashed into his mighty form, and dropped. He stuck a finger in his smallest son's face. "You watch your tongue, boy! Don't be a disgrace!" That girl beat the odds and surprised us all, She helped saved this town from its ultimate downfall. Wendy's proven herself to me. My stone-cold heart she had won, I only wish she was here to show you boys how to get the job done! But my girl's not here, so us four will have to do. We'll work together on this blessed day to show the world that Corduroys rule!"

The boys rallied around their father's battle cry, and Wendy watched them march without batting an eye. "Don't think I'm not touched by Dad's words. I hate to betray his trust. I just wanted to get out of apocalypse training without a fuss. Living through Weirdmageddon was more than enough for me. After that mess, couldn't we relax and let things be?"

Wendy's attention was drawn by the window on the right. Every part of the Northwest Mansion was bathed in glorious light. Its new owner, Fiddleford McGucket, had really turned things around. To properly celebrate, he threw a Christmas party for the whole town! Mingles of classes, both rich and poor, engaged with each other without signs of bore. Gathered at a distant table were a collection of Wendy's chums, Thompson, Tambry, Nate, Lee, and even Robbie V., that gothic bum. They sat bored out of their minds, their attention spans were wearing thin, without their fearless leader to swoop in for the win. The plucky cashier's mischievous mind usually created their favorite dares, games, and pranks, and now without her around, the mellow atmosphere really did stank! Surprisingly enough, Thompson threw his fist down! "Why are we just sitting here? Sure, Wendy's not around, but would she want us to sit around and pout? No way! She'd tell us to get off our butts, no doubt! C'mon, guys. Let's make our Wendy proud! We'll cause a little mayhem and make this party loud! He lifted his half-drank cup of punch into the air, as the rest of the teens joined in with the cheer:

"For Wendy!"

Wendy backed away from the third open portal, "I'm not really sure if I get this moral. Sure, all three present views have people that miss me, but their Christmases seemed to be better if I left things be."

The pixie bobbed her head, "Oh, Wendy. Try looking at this way instead. All of these groups would be better if you were there, but in your absence, they refuse to let their Christmas fall into despair. They celebrate what they have, versus what they have not. Now, with that said, maybe is there something more to Christmas that you thought?"

"Perhaps…" Wendy said, stroking her chin with curiosity. "Great!" The fairy proclaimed. "There's one last thing to see!" However, Wendy's interests soon broke away, as the door called "Christmas Future" made her want to stay. "Hold on!" The sprite cried out. "There's nothing interesting in here, I bet, and I'm not sure if Santa wants you to see that yet."

"It's nice to want things." Wendy opened the door and smirked. "What's Santa hiding now, that big, colossal jerk?" To Wendy's amazement, she was back at Santa's workshop. The lines of elves went on building toys non-stop. The big man himself surveyed his on-going mission, as he stood at the assembly line with his newest addition. Santa patted the shoulder of the pigtailed elf with a familiar, striped uniform. Her frozen, freckled beam was anything but the norm. The elf didn't even so much as breathe or blink, as her hands blindly manufactured new goods with a "clink, clink, clink!"

Wendy covered her mouth, "No! No way! This cannot be! I know that mindless little elf – that's me!"

Wendy's stomach grew nauseous as she stumbled away. Her pixie friend pleaded with her to stay. "Please, Wendy. You don't understand! This possible future is not Santa's ultimate plan!" But Wendy refused to hear her anymore. "Stay away from me! Let me outta this place!" she roared.

The blackened arena shattered like broken glass, Wendy was back in front of Santa and his elven class. The force of the mighty ginger had broken Santa's spell, as her outburst made him land on his jingle bells.

Wendy marched towards him with a nasty glare, until she was pulled back by her ankle snare. "I've had it with you, fat man! You've hit my last nerve! Now, it's about time that I give you what you deserve! You kidnap me and bring me to this awful place, and then you turn me into one of the elven race! You threaten me with child labor? So what? Big deal! Do you know the geezer I work for? He's an even bigger heel! Then, you dare to invade my mindscape and some, and pervert my most private of memories, you scum! You wanna make me your slave? I'd want you to try. Come a few steps closer, and I'll be happy to give you a black eye! I'll give you one last chance to change your mind. I'm too generous, I know. I'm not asking, I'm telling: LET-ME-GO!"

The other elves remained silent as Santa stood upright. His demeanor had changed to that of sorrow, not fright. "My poor Wendy Corduroy. I feel I failed you. For on this night, I was unable to give you Christmas spirit renewed. Your anger and pain is just way too great, I fear this time, ol' St. Nick had arrived too, too late. Your fate has been sealed. I'm sorry it sounds so grim. I have no other choice but to leave you to…him…

With that, Santa and his elves took their leave, leaving Wendy stunned as she couldn't believe. "Where are you all going? What? The truth was too much to bear? Didn't anyone hear me? I said lemme outta here!"

Now, left by herself and trapped in the empty hall, Wendy slumped down into a saddened ball. Her green eyes grew watery, but she refused to cry. To give her captors the satisfaction, the girl would rather die. The worse thing of all no one knew she was stuck here, as they enjoyed their Christmases without worry or care.

"I can't really blame them." Wendy said, with her chin on her knees. "I know I have hang-ups about Christmas. That part's solely on me. Still, I wish that someone could look beyond their bliss, and see that I was missing and things were amiss."

Little did Wendy know, as her mind began to wander, a new portal formed on the assembly wall beyond yonder. She didn't notice the window leading away from this nightmare, until she could make out familiar voices she'd know anywhere.

"Dipper? Dipper? Are you in there? Where are you now? To where did you disappear?"

Wendy climbed on top of the conveyor belt, as the icy feeling in her heart started to melt. Dipper Pines sat on his bed, with a wireless phone in hand, as his twin Mabel charged into the room with a demand. "Dipper, come join the party! What's the matter with you?" He explained to his sister, "Mabel, it's Wendy. I can't get through! All I wanted was to wish her a Merry Christmas, but no one seems to know where she is! I tried the Shack, and Tambry and Nate and the other teens. And no one picks up at her home. The phone just rings and rings! I don't mean to be overprotective, Mabel. I know I have a choice, but I'd feel so much better if I could hear Wendy's voice."

"Oh, Dipper," Mabel sat next to him on his bed. "Quit being such a big worry-head. Wendy's a big girl. She can handle things by her own. The last thing she'd want you to do is make this overblown. It's not a big deal. Christmas isn't Wendy's thing. If she wanted to be here, she would have given us a ring. Remember last summer? Here, I'll give you a clue. You can't force someone to do something they don't wanna do. Now, come on, already! Turn that frown upside-down! Let's get back to the party before anyone notices you're not around!"

And with that, Mabel went back on her way, but in spite of her speech, Dipper still wanted to stay. His parents' party was filled with family friends unknown, and older cousins that rather spend more time on their cell phones. The thirteen-year-old felt like a stranger in his own house, wishing for something that could keep his Christmas spirit from being doused.

He sighed, and lurched forward with a sigh. "Mabel's right, but I couldn't help but try. I know Wendy's busy, but I still wish she would have come. Maybe then, this stupid party wouldn't be so lonely and dumb."

It was then that Dipper made a wish that he hoped would travel far: "I hope you're having a Merry Christmas, Wendy…wherever you are."

A heartbroken Wendy rested her forehead against the portal's seem, when at long last, her eyes started to teem. A line of tears traveled down each cheek as she started to cry. She didn't think of herself, but of her special little guy. "I'm so sorry, Dipper." Wendy sniffled. "I really made things a mess. I wish I could make it right. I should have said "yes.""

"Wendy?" "Dipper?"

"AAH!" The boy screamed as he flew off the bed, convinced at first, he was hearing voices in his head. But sure enough, in a wavy window above his room, contained the image of Wendy, with a sense of doom.

"Wendy?" Dipper asked again. "Is it really you in there?" "Of course it is, dork." She said from the portal in mid-air.

Dipper moved towards the vision of his crush, and upon seeing what was wrong, his voice went in a rush. "Wendy, what's happened? Why aren't you tall? Your hair! Your ears! And what's the deal with that weird hall?"

Wendy wiped her face and started to plead her case. "Dipper, you gotta help me get out of this place! You're not going to believe this! I'm at the North Pole! Santa kidnapped me, and he won't let me go! He's forcing me to make toys and talk to Christmas ghosts. It's like he's trying to find what irritates me the most!"

Dipper immediately sprung to the rescue. "Don't worry, Wendy. I'll find a way to save you!" He examined the portal up and down and side-to-side, But hadn't an idea how to reach his secret love without a guide. After a few minutes, Dipper stood on his bed, as no more plans danced around in his head. "I'm really sorry, Wendy. I haven't a clue. I've never seen anything like this before. I don't know how to help you."

The two teenagers stood on different borders of time and space, as they met for the first time in months face-to-face. Dipper placed a hand against his side of the plane, The shine in his eyes had vanished and drained. "I – I wish you were here with us…with me…" Wendy set her palm against her devotee's. "I do, too, buddy. Trust me. Right now, there's no other place I'd rather be…"

All of a sudden, as though a Christmas blessing, their hands were able to touch through the barrier's meshing! Wendy and Dipper's fingers entwined as they laughed in disbelief, the ability to make physical contact came as such a relief.

Dipper said, "How can this be? I don't understand. Is this really happening? Or is it sleight of hand?" Wendy squeezed harder, "Hey, kiddo? Not at all trying to be rude, but Santa's coming back soon, so please, pull me though, dude!"

With that, Dipper tightened his grip and gave a tug, His noodle arms pulled Wendy into a huge bear hug. Once the slender redhead was more than halfway through, their worries returned with a threat somewhat new.

"What's wrong now?" Dipper strained. "Of all the dumb luck…" "I almost forgot, Dipper." Wendy explained. "I'm stuck! That old fat jerk snapped a cuff on my foot super-tight, to make sure I'd stay in his crummy workshop all night!"

Dipper wouldn't stop trying. "There has to be something I can do. There's no way I'd ever give up on you!" Though the kind words touched Wendy deeply in this situation out of whack, a second later, she could feel something try to pull her back. "No!" Dipper dug his heels deep into the blankets of his bed. "Don' t think this is over! I'd rather drop dead!"

"Dipper! Don't let go!" "I won't!"

Both Dipper and Wendy screamed as they were pulled into the wormhole, They landed back at Santa's workshop back at the North Pole, where Santa awaited with a horrific beast by his side, a ten-foot, horned demon, a so-called protector of yuletide. It was bearded and dressed in tattered clothing, its appearance was terrifying and somewhat loathing. The screams of the damned came from a container on its side. It held a wooden paddle, meant to tan wicked hides. Upon seeing this monster, the partners-in-crime shrieked, holding each other in terror as their knees became weak.

Santa shook his head, "Wendy, I've tried my best to make this right, but I feel there's nothing I can do to have you see the light. There's only one way to curb your attitude so pompous. I introduce to you, the Christmas monster known as the Krampus!

The fanged behemoth unleashed an unearthly roar, that even managed to shake the whole floor. It took a hooved step forwards in its quest, far from trendy, to claim the soul of the wicked child known as Wendy.

"Wait!"

Dipper shielded his still-ensnared sweetheart, He held his arms outwards, ready to do his part. The tiny boy's eyes met with his one-time rival, "Santa…" he greeted, thinking only of Wendy's survival. "Dipper…" Santa replied in the same, sober tone. "So, how goes those "Anti-Santa" traps in your home?" "You already know," Dipper grimaced, "That they're far from okay, but that's not the reason I'm here today. I don't have all the details, but I think I know enough. Please let Wendy go, and we'll be gone without a huff! I know at first, Wendy seems aloof and really tough. But she's so much more than that! Take it from this cream-puff! I get that Christmas spirit is your thing. That's okay and fine. If it's such a big deal, then what about mine? There is nothing I want more than to have Wendy to come home with me, so I ask you kindly, can't we please just let things be? I don't have a leg to stand on. But still, I'll beg this of you today: Please, Santa. Don't take my Wendy away!"

Dipper turned back to see Wendy slightly blushing. He corrected the mistake he made by rushing.

"I mean, "Don't take Wendy away!"

Santa and his pet gave each other a quick look, Their combined decision no more than a split second took:

"NO!"

The Krampus crept by Wendy, as she froze in a trance, as Dipper fought back with a second chance. "All right! You want a bad kid to give your curse? What if I could name someone even worse? A person that definitely deserves your type of misery? Here's a thought. How about you take me?!"

"Dude, don't!" Wendy said. "You really need to shut up now! If you keep going, you'll end up as this thing's Christmas chow!"

But Dipper ignored his crush's protests, and began to list off his sins and confess. "I've lied, cheated, and stole too many times, and that's only the beginning of my crimes! I beat up a gang of gnomes and marked them for dead. I fought living wax statues and cut off Larry King's head! I raised zombies up and left those secret agents to die, and made my sister, Pacifica, and even Wendy cry. I won't fight you, creature. I'll admit I made my own bed. I'll ask you a second time, leave Wendy, and take me instead!"

The Krampus licked his lips with a sense of glee, truly fascinated by Dipper's dirty laundry. He changed course to add Dipper to his collection, as Wendy dashed in front to offer her protection.

"Ain't going to happen, ugly! Not no how, or no way! Lay a claw on that kid, and I swear you're going to pay! If you want Dipper, you'll have to go through me first! So, come on, tough guy! I'm prepared to take your worst! If anyone deserves a decent Christmas, it's Dipper, my boy! And it's gonna happen, or else, my name's not Wendy Corduroy!"

To Wendy and Dipper's surprise, both tormentors began to laugh. Santa and Krampus supported each other so they wouldn't split in half. The elder's smile returned, "See, Wendy? I knew you would come through! Your act of sacrifice shows your Christmas spirit has been truly renewed! Santa's deed has been done. There's no further need for this. You two are free to go and enjoy Christmas bliss!"

Wendy raised an eyebrow, worried if there was another trick to be found. "Seriously?" Santa snapped his fingers a third time, as her shackle opened and fell to the ground. "Seriously."

Dipper and Wendy walked to the portal shining so bright, as Wendy realized something still wasn't quite right. "Santa, my man, I really don't mean to stall, but before we go, can you please make me tall?"

Dipper elbowed his friend, "I dunno. I think I like you better this way." "Please, Dipper, don't give him ideas." Wendy whispered with dismay.

Santa let out another joyful laugh, "Oh, I almost forgot, my dear. When you go home, your natural height will return, so have no fear." He and the Krampus offered a wave as the duo traveled back to California. "Have a Merry Christmas! But if not, you can't say we didn't warn ya!"

Back in Piedmont, Wendy and Dipper landed back in his bedroom, as she discovered she was no longer fitted in elven costume. Wendy's lumberjack clothing and height were rightfully restored, as the portal closely behind them, hopefully forevermore. Relieved, they rushed in for a snuggly embrace, their hearts still racing from escaping such a crazy place.

Dipper looked up at Wendy, "Are you sure you're alright?" "Thanks to you, buddy." She grinned and held him tight. "I don't know what to say, Dipper. Tonight, you really came though." "Oh, it was nothing." He blushed. "If reversed, I'd know I could count on you."

Their touching reunion was suddenly interrupted, as from the doorway, a shrill squeal erupted: "Ohmigosh!" Mabel grabbed her cheeks. "You're really here!" She wrapped around Wendy's waist as the much-taller girl rubbed her brown hair. "I knew I heard your voice! Did you change your mind?" Wendy turned to Dipper as she was caught in another bind. "Actually, Mabel." Dipper started. "Wendy wanted to surprise us. She spent all day and night traveling here on a small bus." Wendy followed along with Dipper's white lie about her stay. "I hope I'm not too late to join you guys on Christmas Day?" "What? No way!" Mabel exclaimed with excitement and great cheer. She flew from the room, "Hey, everybody! You won't believe who's here!"

With the two following along at a safe distance, Wendy gave Dipper a love tap, "Hey, thanks again for the quick assistance." "No biggie." He said with an embarrassed modest. "But if I can ask, are you sure you're ready for all this?" She threw her arm around her favorite little dork. "Of course I am, but now, let's get to work! I have something special to share with you two. Call it an old family recipe: Chocolate-frosted Christmas trees with just a pinch of sesame."

As they rounded the corner, Mabel teased, "Hey, you two! Guess where you're below? You guys are right under the mistletoe – "

"O-kay! That's enough right there!"

Wendy leaned forward on her knees as Dipper remained cross-legged on the colored rug on the floor. They looked up at Soos, dressed in a Santa cap, as he read from a selection of his fanfiction in Stan's recliner.

"Wow…" Dipper rested a heavy head against his fists. "I really didn't believe Soos when he said he made a Christmas story starring us, but there it is…"

"What's the matter?" Soos asked with a disappointed look. "You guys didn't like my Christmas rhymes?"

"No offense, Soos." Wendy threw out an arm in outrage, "But that story was kinda sexist, don't cha think? Why was I the one kidnapped? And Dipper saving me? Isn't that sorta cliché?"

"Well," Dipper held a finger up. "There was that one time at the Dusk2Dawn…"

"Exactly, buster! One time! Check the rescue scorecard, pal! I guarantee I have more saves checked off than you. Bet on it! And you really think Santa can take me on? Let 'im try! I'll punch him in the mistletoe, and break my foot off in his ho-ho – "

*CRASH!*

A thunderous crash could be heard on the Mystery Shack's roof. The sound made all three freeze in their tracks.

"Um," Dipper mumbled. "What was that you were saying, Wendy?"

"I – I," The lumberjane rambled nervously. "Like I was saying, maybe we should take a break, and get some hot cocoa and cookies, and see if there's any wholesome Christmas TV specials on."

"Good idea!"

"Sounds like a plan!"

The boys and Wendy jumped up and left the room, pressed together back-to-back. Their eyes searched every corner, in fear of a possible yuletide attack.

-------------------------------------------------------------

"And from this point here, our story finally concludes. Have a Happy Holiday, my friends. And remember, Santa's always watching you…"

[fortheheavenssake]

💟💟 PG MM Anon(II) 💟💟 Interpretation Collection -12

74. July 29

Kids I want to let you know this riddle is not as funny as some of the other ones because a subject matter is just so serious💜😊PG😊💜

MM Anon

MM ANON …… colourful Cam !!…………… Fast Far-raar-ri blast. …………” let your daughter breathe “…………… A niece wedding …………… Inappropriate funds??………… Bush tragedy ……………… inappropriately shamed royal ………… a pricey disinfect ………… “ you’re a spot on gun Man Sydney!!”………… “ a privilege sir” ……… “ how’s the shoulder?” ……… “ I’ll recover sir “……… “ it’s stopped bleeding “ ……… “ just a flesh wound sir “ ……… “ next week Sydney? ……… “ I hear the Gillie comes highly recommend sir”……… “Ahh, spiffing!! “

Entertainment purposes

💜💜💜💜😂😂🤣🤣🤣Thank you MM Anon🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻💜💜💜💜. Just so you know I put the laughing faces in there because of the the vignettes with the Prince Philip and Sydney are just hilarious!

July 29/2020

Prince Charles and Lady Diana Spencer wed this day in 1981 at St. Paul’s Cathedral. I was like 13 or 14 or so and remember it like yesterday!!

Riddle #74

colourful Cam !!……………

OK I looked and looked and looked and I’m looking at this and I could colourful is self-explanatory cam I’m pretty sure means Cambridge and two!‘s so that usually means to people who stuck stuck nothing I can find fits this. I’m gonna leave it for now and come back.

I don’t think MM Anon is meaning colourful in the term of red white blue green purple orange etc. . I think she means colourful as in telling a funny story you know that is all that’s a colourful story and funny all that kind of thing.Prince William revealed how he made his bodyguard pose as a sniper to scare off a rival football player when he was a schoolboy because ‘everyone wanted to break my legs’.

The Duke of Cambridge, then Prince William, asked his a RPO, to shine a laser’s red dot at the boy pretending to be a sniper. He told this colourful story revelation on an episode of the BBC Radio Five Live’s That Peter Crouch Podcast. The future king’s candid comments came as he shared embarrassing stories over a pint. During the chat at Kensington Palace, they had a curry delivered. I think I wanna find this podcast because I think it probably was absolutely hilarious. Imagine a young boy sneaking over that ha ha Ha ha ha that’s awesome! Good on you William good on you!

Fast Far-raar-ri blast. …………”

We’re talking about a Ferrari hear the Italian car. This kids is again another example of how frightening fake things can be seen as real we see it on Instagram we see CGI and almost every movie that people actors don’t even have to act anymore it’s it’s all fake everything is fake now. Except us we are all real! There is a video that fooled and tricked aka lied to millions. The viral footage of a Ferrari driver ‘escaping from police by driving underneath a truck’ was fake says its creator. He revealed how he did it. The Original video was posted online last Friday and gained 3.1million views. It showed a Ferrari F430 escaping from police car by driving through gap between truck’s wheels. Graphics artist Dionisis Sakas demonstrated in new video how he made footage.He used CGI, a computer-generated image of a Ferrari, truck and police car over bus dashcam footage of road. DISGUSTING! Get a job, volunteer , do something useful in this world instead of spreading more lies like this, that’s sick!

“ let your daughter breathe “……………

This is a sugar is bringing race into it! Black Lives Matter!Both Eric Garner, several years ago in NYC and George Floyd were saying l can’t breathe l can’t breathe lcan’t breathe as a police officer had his knees on his neck! They are equating that incident with what’s going on here! That my friends is a level of mentality we are dealing with! The level of insanity that the sugars possess! I am convinced that when things happen in handcuffs involved charges are laid whatever is going to happen they will be having some sort of physical manifestation, they Well riots gather together range on Twitter for meetings throw stones who knows what it every British Embassy in the United States. I say that because she’s American and I do believe most of the sugars are although she has them all over the world. This is very very very serious verbiage! Wow I am shocked and I don’t get shocked easily wow wow is all I can say! Leave Madam alone! Duchess’s fans aka sugars, rage as dad Thomas Markle hits out ‘Let your daughter breathe’! Well we need a time that since Madame and I’ve been going crazy on her PR we knew it was just a matter time before daddy market would march into the rescue or not to the rescue this time this time is criticizing! I finally caught up on my sleep so let’s give me a minute here to backtrack the daily mail reported that this is now Wednesday morning Monday Monday they reported done he had been interviewed I think on good morning Britain or something there was an article about him anyways criticizing the book and attack criticizing that they were attacking the royal family etc. etc. etc. etc. Madam’s fans/ SUGARS took to Twitter to shield the Madam, from her father’s latest attack. Her estranged father, who lives in Rosarito, Mexico, spoke to the press in the wake of new revelations about the dramatic events leading up to the gathering of unhappy people in May 2018. My my my my my what are those sugars gonna do when it hits the fan and things are really come out and charge to start to come then I’ll my goodness. All these young women what are they gonna do join antifa and form their own gang and try and destroy British Embassy is around the United States or wherever they all live I would imagine most of them live in the United States because she’s American but she probably has sugar is all over the world oh it’s going to be an interesting interesting interesting slideshow to continue to watch that slideshow side show not slide shows sideshow there you go where are you got a good job software good job good job software! Oh you’re typing your compliment twice well good for you you’ve been working hard I’m putting you to the test yes I am talking to my iPad because I think it’s a little sensitive because if I get if it doesn’t like what I’m saying it’ll beep and stop working so I’m whispering as quietly hopefully it doesn’t hear me because I don’t want to hurt it’s sensitive feelings!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂

A niece wedding ……………

How marvellous oh the three Spencer girls oh they’re so beautiful remember them at William and Catherine’s wedding oh they’re so beautiful all. So lady Amelia and lady allies are twins but their paternal twins they don’t look like they’re not identical twins at all but they’re both gorgeous. And all three of these girls and their brother grew up in South Africa. And lady Amelia has been attending Cape Town University where she met her beau, Who she met at the University,Greg Mallet, an estate agent, who is equally well-connected and wealthy. They’ve been together for 10 years and he finally proposed and the picture I have seen are beautiful. She has gorgeous looks kind of like an oval but I think I I think it might be a circle diamond and looks to be surrounded by hail or smaller diamonds it looks beautiful but I’m hoping to see a really clear picture of it that’s why I have not really seen one. Congratulations to them. 🥂

inappropriate

Some people crochet, some people knit,some people do scrapbooking, some people garden,some people take music lessons,there’s all kinds of hobbies in this world! However I have never heard of one quite like this and words fail me.😁DM slightly edited by moi😁 GM allegedly took photos of topless young girls as a ‘hobby’, shocking unearthed court documents reveal. The 58-year-old kept them in a photo album at pedophile JE’s Florida mansion, his former butler Juan Alessi claimed.A judge last week ordered the unsealing of documents related to M and E from a defamation case brought by victim VRG in 2015. The documents could include details about GM’s sex life and among the original files unsealed in 2018 was the eye witness account of Alessi. Alessi told VRG’s lawyers in a sworn deposition that GM had an album full of photos of young girls, including some who were topless. GM shared her alleged hobby for nude 'art’ with JE who had photos of naked girls and women - including GM- plastered all over his mansion.Alessi also claimed in his deposition that he discovered sex toys including,😮😮😮😮😮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮l edited, in the massage room of JE’s Palm Beach mansion. The then-maintenance man also claims he saw a 'shiny black costume’ in GM’s closet that he believed was used for sex. Was he the butler the maintenance man those are two diametrically opposed positions, I don’t understand. What was he doing in her closet if you do the maintenance man? People are all I feel like I need to be sprayed down disinfected maybe this is the price he disinfect clue disinfect oh gross!DM😁additions and slightly edited by moi.

funds??…………

The pressure grows on millionaire farmer Ben Goldsmith, as it emerges he benefited from £25,000 in EU subsidies last year! Ben Goldsmith, brother of environment minister Zac, claimed £25k in EU cash.The 39-year-old millionaire farmer is also a non-executive director of Defra.He has been accused of releasing red deer and wild boar on his land in Somerset.The release of such animals is contrary to current Defra rules and regulations. You know kids, it seems that at every level they’re playing the game! Money changing hands over fist, forget morals,forget ethics, forget everything and anything, just money money money money money makes me think of that song I think it’s by Dire Straits money money money oh!

There is also the bigger issue the money from the Sussex fund and all of that missing money allegedly that a certain Madam may have had now spent or had possession of. I’m not gonna go into that because I don’t think that’s the clue right now.

Bush tragedy ………………

I can hardly cope, l can’t imagine how her parents are managing and her family. I don’t know, I’ve been I prayed for this little girl since the day she went missing she would be found alive. Madeleine McCann investigators resume digging at German allotment patch owned by chief suspect Christian Brueckner as his apartment just three miles away is revealed. And if you look where they’re digging if you see the pictures there’s trees all around so at least in Canada we would call that the bush. Investigators have begun their second day of searching an allotment in Germany three miles from an apartment where suspect Christian Brueckner once lived. Up to 100 officers using small diggers and sniffer dogs continued to excavate the vegetable garden outside Hannover, where Brueckner lived after the three-year-old vanished in 2007.A tent has been erected on the plot concealing the exact nature of the search, and a wide cordon with wire netting has set been up around the allotment.Two small tents have been set up in a field opposite the main dig site, while a fleet of German police vehicles lined the side of the small country road while commuter traffic drove past.An apartment block in Hannover has been identified as Brueckner’s last known address in the city, and German media says he may have lived on the allotment itself - possibly in his trailer.Detectives have been bagging up pieces of evidence and yesterday discovered a cellar underneath a long-demolished gazebo as they scour for clues that could link Brueckner to Madeleine’s disappearance. If you’re so inclined please say a prayer for this family but they finally get some answers and that they find little Madeleine so they can bring her home.🥺🥺🥺🥺🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

inappropriately shamed royal …………

CARAS, some places I’ve read say it’s a Spanish magazine some have said Portuguese either way that’s the name of the magazine. CARAS comes under fire for calling Queen Maxima’s daughter and heir to the Dutch throne , Princess Amalia, 16, as 'plus-size’ on its front cover as critics claim it’s 'dangerous’ and 'disrespectful’! I have said to you kids before, this is the last thing that it’s OK to make fun of people who are overweight and I know personal experience!! It just, it it never ends ,whether iit’s in school whether to University, no matter how beautiful you are , a high functioning and intelligent and whatever, it’s it’s still OK to do mock overweight people!🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬And it goes to stop so far as to people getting hired for jobs or not etc. etc. etc. it’s all it’s so disgusting! She is a beautiful girl oh man what is it gonna do to her psyche she’s 16 oh 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻hell me!The trashy gossip magazine Caras has been slammed by Argentine media outlets. Princess Catharina-Amalia and Queen Maxima were chosen for mag’s July cover.The magazine described the teenage heir to the Dutch throne as 'plus-size’ woman! She is 16 she is a young lady she is not a woman! Subsequently I do believe they have issued an apology an apology but the damage is done the damage is done it’s an in with the damage is done there’s no undoing this absolutely know I’m doing this for her personally! My heart just aches for her she is so beautiful so beautiful oh my heart just aches for that girl oh my! Kids think back to when you were 16 so insecure and so you know trying to fit in and all that other garbage. Do you think high school the most important thing in the world. And she’s going to be the Queen she is going to be the Queen! Oh man my heart aches for her.☹️☹️☹️🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻💜💜💜💜💜 I am sending lots of love and prayers to Princess Amalia !

a pricey disinfect …………

The first thing that came into my mind when I read this with the money that her Majesty offered Madam to leave before The gathering of unhappy people. This is my gut and this is what I’m going to go with. This may not be the correct answer that you were looking for MM Anon but it is what I feel applies most importantly here. This fight has been in the works for years and years at the highest level on the planet, funded by the highest level on the planet. It has been a plot to take down 1000 year old monarchy and totally destroy the country that voted to exit the EU! Brexit would’ve brought about a whole bunch of changes and it will yet hopefully. And her Majesty the Queen is God’s representative on the throne she’s been holy ordained. She is the head of the church of England. I truly believe that there is a worldwide organization of people who serve the dark master. If one believes in God one has to believe in Satan there’s no one with the old the other there’s good and there’s bad. There are many many many who serve the Darkside in the evil of the ways. That is what we have been watching. I firmly believe the first line attack was through JE towards prince Andrew. Prince Andrew was naïve in in a sense of being a royal very much detachment from the ordinary person. There’s no way he could have ever imagined or fortold that anything like this would happen. I do not believe he has any interest in young girls. Does he have a healthy sexual appetite did he absolutely he was a young healthy fit handsome man yes of course, what was going to judge him for that? Do you honestly can’t believe that he and Sarah his wife could’ve raised to such sound wonderful young women as the princess Beatrice and princess Eugenie without being sound themselves? I believe this started in earnest at that point and they had no success. So they had to continue and plot to find a way in and there was Prince Harry, lost in an emotional wasteland trying to find some direction is life after leaving the military. That’s begin the process of finding a female willing to do the deeds, the first one they found changed her mind. But then as evil does, it finds its perfect mate and that was Madam and the whole collection of “family” that she has. A group of cons and grifters at their finest or worst however you look at it. She is a female who’s willing to do anything and everything and has done anything and everything! FOR MONEY! She is narcissistic to the point of pathology. Please I’ve read a few people say she has schizophrenia or is “schizophrenic”. I have worked with dozens and dozens of people with schizophrenia, they do not possess narcissistic traits. Most of them are shy and embarrassed of their symptoms and most of them are young men who who just develop it in their early teens are in their 20s. I am not saying that women don’t develop schizophrenia they certainly do. But the majority of people that I worked with have developed our young men that have developed it in their late teens and 20s often as a result of the use of marijuana a lot of marijuana. They use marijuana to quiet the voices in their head. And it does work for some of them they say it does help. People with schizophrenia do not behave like this they’re thinking is disorganized, they live in an alternate reality even though they can often quite communicate or are mute. They are not capable of being this way and this plot to this degree. I’m not saying they’re not capable, they can be employed and they’re wonderful people just like anybody else with diabetes or whatever. I truly wish that that Stigma and that those thoughts about schizophrenia would change. I really encourage you, if you if your care, if you care, just to do a little bit of reading even though Wikipedia reading of what schizophrenia is it’ll help you understand what millions of people struggle with on a daily basis. Back to Madam psychiatric diagnosis would be Axis ll narcissistic personality disorder or NPD. I do also believe she possesses some Axis lll issues as well, by this time referring to her variety of

hobbies be there a liquid or powder or any of the above. So we have gone through years now of the monarchy being dragged through this sea hags filth and worse yet our beloved prince Harry, through a young man’s foolish to date on a booty call, which I mean let’s face that millions of people do every day even famous people do every day. And the plans, she was, she was ready to the point where she was wearing Diana‘s favourite perfume. Olfactory memory is the strongest memory humans possess. It is so powerful it triggers so much emotion. So when he walked in and sat down at the table to have a drink with her and smelled her perfume just imagine the flood of endorphins and things that he may not even have been consciously aware of that were triggered and his brain just imagine just sit yourself down there and imagine. And then as things progressed you know the story. And the filth has permeated the planet, it has permeated race relations, it has permeated in the resulting or sugars it has permeated in the Black Lives Matter fascist group That is being well funded by the people that plotted, the backers. They have just been laying in wait waiting for the right moment. Do you think all these people just happen to gather together and had weapons and stuff just at the drop of a hat?How would they know to go where to go, what to do, where to meet? Cities are huge and yet they all seem to go on the in the exact same area. Do you think that’s a coincidence? Do you think that’s a coincidence that it’s happening all over the United States and all over the UK and all over the world in different places? Do you think that’s OK? Do you think that’s a coincidence? I myself do not believe in coincidences. Go back to your high school or university physics Newtons law of physics, every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Nothing happens by coincidence, everything we do whether it’s in thought act or deed that is put out into the universe it affects something somebody or somehow. This was all planned. Her Majesty the Queen was wise enough to know this, as well as British intelligence, to be monitoring all these things to let her know and the government know. She was wise enough to call Lord Geidt back into service. Thank God he was agreeable! He immediately, I am certain recognized the severity of what the situation was. They have planned and they have played the long game, all while keeping calm and carrying on and looking beautiful. And due to the scale the Crown never fails! And what we see now are the results of them playing the long game. Madam imploding upon herself due to her own behaviour and her own narcissism. I do believe we’re near the end I do believe any day now as I said yesterday imminently, we will receive some announcement of some sort. Her Majesty is safely ensconced at Balmoral for three months usually her usual 12 weeks. I’m sure more security than she’s ever had there before and there’s more security around all the royal family members that we’ve ever ever had before. We will never see that security. We will never notice them. They are that good. They could be the seventy year old lady on the street, still able to be just as dangerous as any criminal. We are coming to a close Madam,is all that done. And the backers?? I’m not sure where things are at, but London scoop said this will involve the world but mostly the UK the United States and Australia. The United States is on fire with these antifa riots. The democratic cities mayors and governors of certain states are refusing to take action I’m naming Oregon and Washington in particular I feel so sorry for those people who have businesses and who live in those areas that are being rioted night after night after night especially in Portland I’m thinking of Portland Oregon. There’s a presidential election in November this year. One would never know it usually all you see on the news are debates and candidates and all that. But we’re not seeing that we’re seeing coronavirus and riots. And what I’ve seen of the democratic nominee, and the party as a whole has

me very very concerned. He has yet, I don’t think he has had a press conference.? I am not aware and when I have seen is a gentleman who is quite elderly who oh, I don’t want to insult anybody who is democratic here,but who is buying into these far left wing fascist agenda who seems to at times doesn’t know what city he’s in. And there was a video that I saw he was standing with a few couples who were with their children and I don’t know what awards he was giving out, but he was massaging the shoulders and pulled her close to him tightly with his arm around her, little girl next to him and you could could Around her shoulders and you could see the look on her face that she was so uncomfortable and she tried to pull closer to her parents who were holding another child and he pulled her back in. I’m telling you I don’t know where that was taken but it was so, it was so hard for me to watch, oh you know something I said I pray for that little girl I pray for that child. I’m not saying he’s he’s a paedophile anything don’t get me wrong but I’m just talking about boundaries just boundaries. Anyhow say what you will about President Trump many people do regularly! I’m gonna get myself in trouble here but I do believeI do believe if he does not win the reelection I fear the collapse of the United States. I don’t know how they’re even going to be able to have an election in the midst of this coronavirus, how do you know how long the quested are to vote to take their long long long long. Oh kids this is the expensive disinfecting and we all are paying a price and continue to and will continue to.

“ you’re a spot on gun Man Sydney!!”………… “ a privilege sir” ……… “ how’s the shoulder?” ……… “ I’ll recover sir “……… “ it’s stopped bleeding “ ……… “ just a flesh wound sir “ ……… “ next week Sydney? ……… “ I hear the Gillie comes highly recommend sir”……… “Ahh, spiffing!! “

Well we return to the beautiful vista that is Balmoral castle and it’s I will be 15,000acres acres in beautiful at the Aberdeenshire. I spent my share of time not at Balmoral but in Aberdeen Aberdeen sure all the first the Firth of Forth!! Oh my it’s so beautiful I’ve taken so many pictures and hanging on my living room wall I have a black-and-white photo l took, I think it’s like 11 x 18 or something it’s so beautiful oh so beautiful the river there’s a bridge going over the river and the time I took the picture was an autumn so the leaves were all so gorgeous oh man it’s so beautiful. One of the first things that hit me the very first time I tasted tapwater in Scotland and I happen to be in her and I are just outside Aberdeen where I was staying with my friends and I have never had water that taste is so beautiful it was pure it was cold it was fresh it was free from chemicals no chlorine Teays know anything and there was no water filter on the top of their they did not have a reverse osmosis filter like everybody here has now it was so good oh and I just kept remarking on and everybody kept laughing at me how good the water was. Then we went out for lunch at all man I stupid Canadiana CanadianaWe are ordering lunch and came to my turn to order lunch should I order lunch and I want to more of that water and she looked at me and she said would you like flat or still and I I just like what what and I looked at my restaurant we want to find especially that I had came there to see and he was like she’ll have still ha ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha. And then after I said what what is that and he says oh Blondie never mind ha ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha I’ll never forget that oh man that was so funny. anyhow back to Balmoral, sounds like the hunting trip had a bit of a Dick Cheney moment. If you don’t know who took Dick Cheney, he was an American politician and he accidentally shot another politician that he was hunting with a severe it was this it wasn’t severe but all man oh man. so himself is complementing Sydney on how well he is spotting him with the gun and making sure it’s ready and loaded and everything and just what a successful hunting day they had. And Sydney ever the dutiful a butler said yes he concurs it was just just smashing and then himself ask him how his shoulder is and he’s ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I can’t continue ha ha ha ha still funny way too funny ha ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha.I shall continue I can come compose myself myself and continue. Himself ask Sydney how his shoulder is Sydney says it all recover all recover sir I am I shall recover, it stopped bleeding it stop bleeding and I shall recover in just a flesh room so just just a flesh room can you not hear the accent so can you hear the accent just a flesh wound sir! Capital , Sydney, Capital! Then planning for next weeks outing, Himself asks Sydney, are you ready for next weeks outing and he replies oh yes sir , I hear the Gilly comes high they recommended sir. Himself says sniffing smashing , wonderful , marvellous , looking forward to it and Sydney is just shivering in this boots. MM Anon, you have no idea how I can picture these things in my head and I was just all man’s took me forever to do because I was laughing so hard!

GSTQAOBC 🇨🇦🇬🇧🇦🇺🇳🇿

—————-

75. July 29

MM ANON………… Peter,Crouch with William ………… 🎼Son in Law🎼…………Facebook , Apple, google …………… 5 friends , Shhhhhh !!!……………… very upset islands………… MM is leaking 🤣🤣………… Refund , Shmeefund.…………Heath-row row!!……… “Why is ones arm in a sling Sydney ??…………… “ I slipped exiting the LR ma’am………” where was Philip ?………… “ sitting in the back ma’am”……” hello old thing, what’ho Sydney “ ……… good afternoon sir”……” Sydney had a hiatus Philip “……… “ O dear, looks sore Sydney “ ……” yes sir”…… “VERY!!”

Entertainment purposes

💜💜💜💜😊😊😊😊🌈🌈🌈🌈Thank you MM Anon🌈🌈🌈🌈😊😊😊😊💜💜💜💜

July 29/2020. Riddle#75

Peter,Crouch with William …………

Peter Crouch has a podcast on the BBC. Yesterday Prince William was on there with him and some other chaps I can’t remember their names. The purpose was Williams continuing goal to bring awareness to the issues regarding mental health. They had a good talk over a pint and they ordered some curry. The topic of mental health continues to be of importance however there were some very very funny stories that came out of the meeting. One was a prince William gave Catherine, remember they were not married yet they were still dating, he gave her a set of binoculars oh dear for a gift one time. The funniest story he told that when he was young and the other boys were picking on him and one especially wanted to break his legs and kept threatening to. William got the idea to get his RPO to take a laser and shine it on the guys forehead so there would be a red dot 🔴 on his forehead and William told him that there was a sniper if you did anything bad.🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂😂 Can you kids just imagine oh man I’ve laughed so hard about that and I’m still laughing I’m still laughing!

🎼Son in Law🎼…………

I thank the website beyondthejoke.co.uk for this information. It was very hard to find,very very hard but I am like Inspector gadget or the RCMP we always get our man and I always get some sort of answer for each clue. They’re not always right but they’re often funny if they’re wrong ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha by the way it’s on the way it’s a win-win situation right it’s a win-win plus it’s free! I should be charging you kids me and Eminem MM Anon and could make a fortune not Eminem no no no.A new video depicting Donald Trump performing a song in praise of his son-in-law, Jared Kushner, is today revealed as being the work of The Simpsons and Spinal Tap star Harry Shearer. Son in Law is the first track to be released from Shearer’s forthcoming album, The Many Moods of Donald Trump, a cycle of satirical songs inspired by the last four years of US politics and in particular the often mercurial behaviour of the current occupant of The White House.The video of the track uses ground-breaking motion-capture animation to portray the US President lionizing his senior advisor and husband of his daughter Ivanka. At one point it shows the spookily real Trump with his hand casually hovering over the nuclear button on his desk in The Oval Office, whilst extolling the virtues of his daughter’s curves.Harry Shearer says, “You can’t fire family, but you can sing about them.”Written by Shearer, the old-style New Orleans R&B song has The Simpsons star on vocals in an eerily accurate impersonation of the President of The United States. He is joined by a band of top New Orleans musicians who include David Torkanowsky of The Astral Project and Stanton Moore Trio on piano and organ, The Metres star George Porter, Jr. on bass, Raymond Weber of Dumpstaphunk on drums, leading saxophonist Brad Walker, Scott Frock of Delfeayo Marsalis’ Uptown Jazz Orchestra, on trumpet, and one of New Orleans’ top trombonists Jon Ramm. The track is mixed by long-time Harry Shearer musical collaborator C J Vanston at The Treehouse North Hollywood and produced by David Torkanowsky. It was recorded in New Orleans and Los Angeles. I will provide the link if you are so inclined to take a peek. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZtptN8bfl3M

Some of you may find it offensive and some of you may get a good laugh out of it and a bit of both. I will leave it up to you to decide. I lasted about 30 seconds and that was enough for me. I’m not trying to influence you in anyway you you do you kids you do you as the kids say now!

Facebook , Apple, google ……………

The U.S. Congress is to grill Bezos, Cook, Zuckerberg, and Pichai: CEOs of Amazon, Google, Apple and Facebook whose firms are worth a combined $5.5trillion agree to appear TOGETHER before House antitrust panel!Jeff Bezos, Mark Zuckerberg, Tim Cook and Sundar Pichai will testify in late July. They will appear before House Judiciary Committee’s antitrust panel.FYI😁Antitrust refers to relating to legislation preventing or controlling trusts or other monopolies, with the intention of promoting competition in business.FYI😁The panel has been investigating tech firms’ alleged anti-competitive practices.Amazon, Facebook, Apple, and Google are accused of stifling competition. Bezos, the CEO of Amazon, was initially reluctant to testify before lawmakers.Lawmakers reportedly threatened Bezos, world’s richest man, with subpoena.Apple CEO Cook, was also hesitant, prompting lawmakers to consider subpoena.But they eventually relented on condition that all four CEOs appear jointly. Well isn’t that special! It’s like a meeting of the three heads of the biggest mafia families, sorry no insult meant to the mafia. Have you ever seen Mark Zuckerberg testify? Have you ever seen Star Trek the next generation? There’s a character on there his name is Data, he’s an android but he’s very human. Every time I see Mark Zuckerberg, I see Data, pardon the pun aka data🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂😂😂! Last time he testified there was no affect on his face and he gave, he must be related to Madam,because all he gave us a bunch of word salad nonsense that made no sense. It was far above the technical level of any of the people asking questions. This time I hope they have people who have done their research who actually know about these industries to actually ask the important questions!

5 friends , Shhhhhh !!!………………

Oh Madam’s legal team were in court today, ahead of court tomorrow. They put in a what’s it called….. It is not the deposition I mean use the word request until I can find the proper legal word. 😁FOUND IT😁Her legal team applied for an order to keep the identities of the 5 women confidential and not name them publicly. Funniest thing a member of her legal team said the last name of one of the women in court! Imagine that they’re wanting something kept quiet and the attorney cannot even keep quiet wowza, I wouldn’t want that attorney! The judge instructed that that name be removed from the record. Basically what they did is they want the court to keep schtüm and not publicly reveal the names of the “” five friends” who spoke to people magazine about Madam. Madam has denied having given permission or even having any for knowledge about this issue. Court will be interesting tomorrow I can hardly wait wait! Given her success and I’m using that very sarcastically, with the book that she allegedly had no part in, but everything came from her mouth, and should be very very very interesting and that’s putting it mildly!I just took a wee wander over to the daily mail and there’s a new article they’re saying that she has lost a part of the bed and she has to pay £67,000 in AND legal bills ha ha Ha ha ha I think that’s hilarious ha ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha that’s hilarious hilarious justice hitting her right where it hurts most money her pocketbook awesome!

very upset islands…..

You kids remember the show with Ricardo Montalban called fantasy Island. I remember Ricardo Montalban doing a car commercial and in his accent,he would say, this is made with fine Corinthian leather ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! He also played Kahn in the Star Trek movies, one Captain Kirk yelled Kahn re member that all you Star Trek friend Kahn!🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂OK OK I’m gonna do the riddle now pardon me for adding some humour in this!I’m going back in the 80s it’s on one of the cable channels I get I watch it every now and then is so cheesy it is just so beyond the pale of it’s hilarious and at that time we thought it was like the greatest thing I remember the love boat came on and then fantasy Island that was Saturday night TV love boat and then fantasy Island wow what a wild child hood I lived eh?🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂. Ibiza, Mallorca and Canary Islands’ tourism chiefs have launched desperate bid to open ‘safe air corridors’ with the UK to save their summer seasons after the two-week quarantine was announced. Canary & Balearic Islands officials hoping to establish ‘safe air corridors’ with UK. This comes after the U.K. government ordered British tourists to self-isolate on returning from Spain.Spain has been taken off of the safe travel list after a spike in coronavirus cases.The decision was described as a ‘hammer blow’ by hotel bosses in Benidorm.Town mayor Toni Perez insisted he would still encourage holidaymakers to com.

From the BBC, I shall attempt to say this in my best old fashioned BBC British accent.😁 The UK’s biggest tour operator, Tui, has cancelled all mainland Spanish holidays until 9 August.The move comes after the government imposed a 14-day quarantine on people arriving in the UK from Spain.The firm said all those going to the Balearic and Canary Islands could still travel as planned from Monday.The airline industry has reacted with dismay to the decision to impose the quarantine, calling it a big blow.The Foreign and Commonwealth Office (FCO) is advising against all but essential travel to mainland Spain. Quarantine measures apply to those returning from mainland Spain, the Canary Islands and the Balearic Islands, such as Majorca and Ibiza.British Airways is still operating flights, but said the move was “throwing thousands of Britons’ travel plans into chaos”.Budget airline easyJet is also maintaining a full schedule, as is Jet2. That’s all from the BBC for now good night. You can always go to BBC.co.uk with other information!😁😁😁 how did I do did you hear my old fashioned British accent and NOT RECEIVED PRONUNCIATION☺️😁😁😁?Do you think I could work for the BBC in 1950? Can I go on Doctor Who and get him somehow to take me back in time so, but I wasn’t born then yet oh that’s a little spanner in the mix is it not,have to have a think on that.

MM is leaking 🤣🤣…………

MM is leaking. Are you OK MM Anon? Do you have drafty windows and a maybe a hole in the roof and the waters coming in? When it rains?Or maybe you’re just like Madam you just want somebody to ask you are you OK ha ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha! After what you went through last week my goodness was it the week before you are more than OK my friend thank God! 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻If you don’t know what I’m talking about, you scroll way on back and you’ll you’ll read all about it!! OK I’ll get serious now this is regarding my least favourite person on the planet Madam, she’s leaking in every way possible she’s bleeding money she’s bleeding whatever was left of her public image and today she got an alarm and I love it she has to pay £67,000 in legal fees for the ANL ha ha ha ha ha ha oh ha ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha oh God has a funny sense of humour does He not, oh thank you Lord! Her legal team went to court in attempt to stifle the release of the name of the five women who went to people magazine, totally unknown ,unaware she was totally not involved didn’t give approval didn’t know it was gonna happen. Right then, remember the other day I said there was a bridge in the Sahara desert? Well it’s still for sale and anyone who believes that just come on over and I’ll give you a tour and I’ll give you a real good price on that Desert bridge! After all they’re making air bridges now so so what’s wrong with a desert bridge ha ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha.The funniest thing and I said it before but the funniest thing about the whole thing is they’re just wanting to keep that confidential and one of her legal team mentioned the surname of one of the women would one question the competency of the members of her legal team? I think I might I’m not an attorney I’m not even a paralegal like like Madam was on like TV, and like like she thinks like, she’s a paralegal for real like, now and knows all about the UK laws and everything like totally! That was my doing my best California speak every other word is like like this OK like that OK well like that’s cool like like this for like a walk and we can like take the dog and we can like go for coffee and then we can go for like a movie and then we can like maybe rent a movie actually and then we can like go home and like make dinner and like and like and like and like that’s how they speak! Hope I’m not insulting anything maybe that’s just cliché but that’s what I seen on TV it is so annoying. It’s just like people who are constantly using foul language like on the regular,like not like when there’s a serious incident like it’s just it just blows my mind. There are so many words in the English dictionary there’s no need on the regular to be using foul language. I’m not saying I have never uttered some, you want some when I was still driving that when somebody cut me off or whatever I uttered my share but not on the regular never! OK back to the riddle now😁😁😁So the judge ordered that name to be stricken from the record! It’s going to be really really interesting to see what happens in court tomorrow I can hardly wait! I’m like a dog dog, Pavlov‘s dog just celebrating celebrating celebrating oh golly I have got to hand typed that SALIVATING!! If you don’t know about Pavlov‘s dogs just go to google please thank you.

Refund , Shmeefund.…………

What a non-summer it’s been eh? No fairs no carnivals, no music concerts outdoors, no outdoor team sports it’s just been a right off!The ones from the UK that would like you to go on holiday and have a lovely time were shocked to learn that all there’s a snap decision and when you return you have to for quarantine for 14 days! Those people who do have jobs will have to miss 14 days! How this coronavirus it’s just it it’s just it’s like the Friday the 13th movies’ Jason in the mask, 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂I didn’t mean a pun by Jason in the mask ha ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha mask get it?? Bad puns l know but the best ones are the accidental ones like this one! Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha sorry I’m laughing and when I’m laughing it types ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha oh I’m so sorry! But we need a wee bit of humour in this do we not! It just keeps coming and coming and coming and going and accelerating and spreading in affecting in and infecting it is unbelievable! Holidaymakers struggle to get refunds With holidaymakers still owed millions of pounds for cancelled holidays and flights, many will be reluctant to rebook if their trip is cancelled. Some major travel companies are still refusing to issue refunds as required by law, insisting customers rebook their trip or accept vouchers instead. We approached the UK’s 10 biggest package holiday providers and 10 largest airlines at the end of April, and found none were consistently meeting their legal requirements to refund consumers within the statutory timeframe. Companies including TUI, Love Holidays, Virgin Holidays and Ryanair are issuing credit notes for cancelled bookings in the first instance, even when customers have asked for cash refunds. Following months of pressure from Which?, the government has finally confirmed that credit notes issued for air-based packages have the same financial protection as the holidays they replace, so if a travel company collapses, customers will be refunded by the travel industry Atol scheme. However, vouchers issued for scheduled flights booked separately aren’t covered by the Atol scheme and have no financial protection. Clients still have a legal right to a cash refund instead of a credit note or voucher, if that’s their preference. Some customers have resorted to asking their debit or credit card provider to help get their money back, while those still paying deposit instalments on holidays for this summer are wondering what to do.So far the lockdown and stuff since February and March is not bad enough, they finally get a vacation or holiday whatever you want to call it and then they find out they have got to quarantine or they have it booked and the country is on the list of do not travel or the air bridge is closed which has been closing to many countries now they are tickets are invalid! Try getting your money from airlines who are weeping money at this point they are just weeping money it’s just leaking from every nook and cranny.

Heath-row row!!……… “

DM😁Revolt of the airline chiefs: Travel bosses urge Boris Johnson to drop blanket restrictions on whole countries amid row over quarantine.47 companies called on Johnson to introduce virus tests for arrivals to the UK. British Airways, Easy Jet and Jet2 have demanded a more 'nuanced’ policy. Signatories also include chief executives of Heathrow and Gatwick airports.Heathrow blames social-distancing 'chaos’ on holidaymakers arriving too EARLY as passengers complain of 'no staff managing massive queues’. Footage shows people close to one another at airport’s Terminal 2.The Passenger who filmed video questioned: 'Where are your staff managing this?' Other social media users have posted pictures of crowded scenes at Heathrow. Heathrow Airport said it is 'aware’ of passengers arriving several hours in advance of flights.British Airways pulls staff out of its £200million headquarters for six months - as just half of City bankers return to offices.BA joins the likes of Google, KPMG and RBS by keeping staff at home until 2021.Around 22,000 staff are on furlough, with 12,000 workers set for redundancy.Large companies are facing growing calls to bring employees back to the office. Travel chiefs want virus checks for UK arrivals and an end to blanket restrictions on whole countries… so how COULD Britain test its way out of travel trouble? Giving travellers coronavirus tests on arrival could curtail the quarantine period.Heathrow has said the airport could have testing sites ready ‘within weeks’.Scientists say testing people arriving in the UK can help curb the pandemic.DM😁 hey if they wrote it perfectly and I give them the credit I think that’s pretty darn fair right! Anybody who disagrees with me can you raise your hand please nobody raise their hand oh thanks kids I love you! 💜🙏🏻😊PG😊🙏🏻💜

“Why is ones arm in a sling Sydney ??…………… “ I slipped exiting the LR ma’am………” where was Philip ?………… “ sitting in the back ma’am”……” hello old thing, what’ho Sydney “ ……… good afternoon sir”……” Sydney had a hiatus Philip “……… “ O dear, looks sore Sydney “ ……” yes sir”…… “VERY!!”

Well we return to the placid Balmoral Castle in Beautiful Aberdeenshire! Oh every time I say that my heart skips a beat oh I had such special times there. Oh my my heart is so full of 🥰.If l could only tell your kids all of what my experiences there, but alas I cannot because you don’t share that online. Suffice it to say my heart is still there. Now back to our story kids commercials over,🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂Himself and Sydney have returned from a very successful hunt. Not hunch Hunt not hunch Hunt Hunt! Thank you thank you very much! Yes I am talking to my audio software it seems to work better and it’s a little bit sensitive. I’ve said before it doesn’t always want to write the word that I say. Sometimes when it gets really mad at me it beeps and it just shuts off and will not continue. So like I said yesterday sometimes I really have to whisper when I tell you guys things like that because I don’t want it to hear and I don’t want to see it’s feelings to get hurt.I don’t want it to get any more sensitive than it already is so, let’s all stay calm and hope and pray it will behave throughout this riddle!😁😁😁🤣🤣🤣😁😁😁😁 now back to our story!Her Majesty sees Sydney and she enquires,why is your arm in a sling Sydney? And he says oh my I just slipped slipped while I was getting out of the Lone Ranger a.k.a. the range rover. Naturally naturally she inquires where was Himself? And of course he’s been told your Majesty. ma’am,he was safely in the backseat! I think we all know the reason why himself is in the backseat or on the passenger side and not in the driver seat!And then in walks Himself,all proud, like a cock on a walk, as the old saying goes when the rooster struts across the farmyard and try to. impress all the hens or impress the prettiest hen. He would strut his stuff very confidently!Oh hello, saying he says his wife probably gives her a kiss or maybe a wave! Hello Sydney what ho? As if nothing had happened no no there was no no shots that went awry no injuries nothing like that nothing to see here folks nothing nothing at all! Her Majesty says to himself well Sydneys had a bit of a break hiatus. And Sydney greets him a good afternoon sir! Noticing his arm,oh that looks very sore.😆😆🤭🤭🤣🤣🤣 Sydney concurs that very very very veryVERY sore!!!🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂😂Can you kids imagine what they’ve all gotten up to in the last word 50 or 60 years that he’s been his butler? Oh my goodness this is just too funny I just love this part of the riddle it’s just all I can just visualize it totally!

GSTQAOBC 🇨🇦🇬🇧🇦🇺🇳🇿

——————

76. July 31

MM ANON …… Kate being scilly ……… ……… Borix nails down the caughin ………… roving explorer …………… phew! What a scorcher …………… Lions Arm-y…………… climate is a changing …………… ( get well mr, skippy 🌈) ……………beaches,stay away 😱😱………………Peer- pressure ‘ O brother!! …………… tick tick bite!! ……………”doctor, what’s growing on my arm.” …………… Williams conservs film

Friday July 31/20. Riddle #76

💜💜💜💜😊😊😊😊😊🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈Thank you MM Anon🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈😊😊😊😊😊💜💜💜💜

July 31/2020 28 years ago this evening, l lost my mum☹️, seems like yesterday. I am so glad and thankful I have my Tumblr community and these riddles that challenge me and give me something to look forward to. I am ever so grateful and in all of your debt for you of all been so kind to me and will welcome me thank you💜🙏🏻😊🙏🏻PG💜🙏🏻😊🙏🏻💜

Kate being scilly ……… ………

Well the Cambridges are on holiday at the Isles of Scilly. I think it’s quite funny because a lot of people online are ha ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha ha ha Ha ha ha thinking that is Sicily and that they went to Italy ha ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha! Why on earth would they take their family to Italy with Covid oh that’s hilarious LOL anyways. They were seen riding bikes and having just a nice family time.Isn’t it nice that they demonstrate without preaching they just live their life and somehow, somehow they always get it right. Local tourism at its finest and don’t tell me they didn’t have a marvellous time or that they aren’t having a marvellous time. The only thing I wish is that people hadn’t made it public if they could stay private but I guess I mean that is a lot to wish for.

Borix nails down the caughin …………

I believe he use the phrase putting the pedal on the brakes. Shocking lockdown arrangements orders whatever has been passed down. And a great many Muslims are going to celebrate Eid and now things are just thrown I’ll say it again like a spanner in the mix. A coffin for dead people is spelt the way it just appeared. Caughin Chaldean number 6 in numerology. But KOFN is the urban dictionary kind of describes exactly this. I will let you look up what that means and you can decide if you want to or not that’s up to you but I’m i’m not gonna put it here a ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ! I am certain man is citizens feel exactly the way that that acronym the way that feels. Borix is a tool for editing. However I think it’s just a joking way of saying the name of the tool that is those of you know that’s flying from back in the day when you called somebody was being like a jerk, all that is a real tool! And so I think Borix is referring to Boris Johnson!

roving explorer ……………

Roving means roaming or wandering. not assigned or restricted to any particular location, area, topic, etc.: a roving editor. not assigned to any particular diplomatic post but having a special mission: a roving ambassador. Explorer means a person who explores an unfamiliar area; an adventurer.

I know William and Harry, when they were young, they were taken on holiday to the isles of Scilly. I’m not sure if Catherine has been there.I know that their children definitely haven’t been so this might apply to them as well.

I know that Beatrice and Edo have taken a car trip for their honeymoon there driving all around Frantz. Just you know touring around just like a regular old couple with you are young couple. I don’t know that’s what this is roving then it was the explorers.

phew! What a scorcher ……………

I read it was 31°C in the UK today. And in speaking with a friend the last couple days have been quite warm. But I watch the BBC weather and it says it supposed to cool down a little bit so that’s good but it is the middle of summer right so you want the nice!! The other major scorcher that I am thinking of is the unsealing of documents in the GM case currently before the judge in New York City. I made a PDF And it’s currently sitting in my iBooks waiting for me to read it. Which I will at some point I’m just not in the mood for that today but yeah I will read it. So lots of hot stuff all around lots and lots! If you’re out please remember to use sunscreen and drink a lot of fluid! And don’t forget your for babies they get hot with their fur, kids know that I don’t need to tell you that right right!

Lions Arm-y……………

A tourist had part of his arm ripped off by a lion as he slept in a tent alongside his wife during an exclusive African safari organised by a British travel firm. The snarling beast ripped part of Patrick Fourgeaud’s left arm off during the horrifying mauling in the Ruaha National Park, in Tanzania.His wife, Brigitte Fourgeaud, 63, said: ‘I will never forget that moment when I woke up to see the lion there.‘I thought we were both going to die. The attack will stay with me for the rest of my life.'🥺🥺🥺🥺😮😮😮😮😮😬DM. OK what the heck? This happened in 2015! Why is this news today in the daily mail? What on earth I did that short story? Stories stories stories? Thank you got it! I’m talking to the software, I have truly lost my marbles! A few marbles I did have left rolling around in my head talking to this software and then talking through the software and then talking to the software oh my stars and garters!! This article even has photos which I will not include! sometimes I think they just put things in there just for sensationalize ation you spell sensationalize ation that’s not how you spell it sensationalize ation know that’s not how you spell it let me do it let me do it stop shut off shut off, sensationalization! Hair that���s how you spell it no I didn’t say here I said there that’s how you spell it! Whooooo it is in a mood today kids oh my gosh it’s been like this all day and I hope it doesn’t hear me. I hope it doesn’t hear me because it is very difficult selling very difficult today not selling or selling may be difficult to get spelling spelling has been very difficult today for this software and you know it’s OK tomorrow will be a better day right ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂.Oh I’m trying to give your kids a laugh I hope it’s working!

climate is a changing ……………

I think we’ve all heard about climate change and experienced it hotter summers or for us here is much milder winters with more snow. Talking about with the weather here. I think that she’s talking about the climate in terms of the mill you of how people are relating to one another in the last six months. The COVID-19 lockdown has left a lot of people out of money and with very short fuse is temporary and as we all know the Black Lives Matter movement has been all over the place and antifa has been involved in the UK branch of black live matter is very much a fascist organization. Now with the cancellation of Eid at the last minute and some stupid comments made by some MP that I will repeat his name but he basically said that he believes that it was people in the BAME population who were the most non-compliant with the facemask and all the social distancing. If the pedal on the brakes for the PM was not enough those comments by that MP, Sitting on fire all with Kinley nicely laid out and another piece of the wood that you use that to get with a call to start a fire it’s like pouring fuel on there and then hucking a match in there. You bet the climate do the relationships amongst different people in the world different populations different cultures you that there is changing and they are changing fast and violently. 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 let’s pray let us pray really hard that it does not get worse.

( get well mr, skippy 🌈) ……………

There have been so many prayers said for you Mr.🐼. I cannot tell you how pleased I am that you were home and that you are in normal sinus rhythm!! I want to thank you for sharing Skippy 🐼 with me and the whole world! That is a gift unlike any other! I wish you many many many many years of good health!💜💜🙏🏻🙏🏻😊😊PG😊😊🙏🏻🙏🏻💜💜

beaches,stay away 😱😱………………😁Me Shark attack in Maine!! It’s a chap on TV right now he’s talking about how they were trying to save certain fish and they changed some of the environment laws which now means a great rise in the Apex predator. And there is no bigger Apex predator except the killer whale then the great white shark! Oh my goodness! He’s saying don’t wear black and don’t go in range of their hunting territory ha ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha well I think their hunting territory is water so it’s pretty much stay the heck out of the water ha ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha how brilliant advice from a scientist! Wonder how many years he had to study to learn to stay out of the water when you see great white sharks wow that is brilliant I would’ve never thought of that!! Now we’re back to serious. 😁livescience.commA fatal great white shark attack occurred in Maine on Monday (July 27) was only the state’s second recorded shark attack ever. But white sharks have long been in the waters of the Gulf of Maine. The second was this Monday’s attack, with a far more tragic outcome. Julie Dimperio Holowach, 63, of New York City, was swimming with her daughter when she was attacked and killed. A tooth fragment left behind indicated that the attacker was a great white shark.It’s likely that the shark mistook Holowach, who was wearing a wetsuit, for a seal, said Bob Hueter, a senior scientist at Mote Marine Laboratory and also chief scientist for the marine research organization OCEARCH. Seals are common along the coastline of the Gulf of Maine, he told Live Science.😁

😁HURRICANE CENTRAL.Hurricane Warning Issued for Florida As Isaias Spins in the Bahamas; Weekend of Strong Winds, Heavy Rain For SE Coast. Hurricane Isaias (ees-ah-EE-ahs) is expected to strengthen as it tracks through the Bahamas into Saturday and then will move near Florida this weekend, before tracking up the East Coast as far north as New England next week.A hurricane warning has been issued for a portion of Florida’s East Coast, from Boca Raton to the Volusia/Brevard County Line.A hurricane watch has been expanded, now in effect for portions of Florida from north of the Volusia-Brevard County line to the Flagler/Volusia County Line, and for South Florida from Boca Raton to Hallendale County. A hurricane watch is typically issued 48 hours before the anticipated first occurrence of tropical-storm-force wind, conditions that make outside preparations difficult or dangerous. From Weather.com.😁Me now. I thought that was a very unique name for hurricane I’ve actually never heard that name before at all, Isaias! Oh I feel for people when it’s hurricane season. I’ve been so many bad ones and climate change is such a real thing such a real thing and we all know it. Pray for those people that are in the path of the storm. When I watched the weather earlier today, let me backtrack, when they forecast hurricanes or that’s not the right word but when they tell about a hurricane that there’s usually four or five models that they use to determine the track of the hurricane. The chap that was doing the weather, he said basically all the the the types of formulations that they use are basically all showing that same track that for the hurricane to go so that’s a really good thing there’s sometimes a really wide.😁Me

Peer- pressure ‘ O brother!! ……………

Well the PM handed out Peerages today.. His brother got one and a couple other chaps also. The article I read the title was cronyism at its finest I think. I am so happy that John Bercow has a Peerage! I really do I mean he served for years love him or hate him,he sure added a lot of colour to Parliament! I’m telling you I enjoyed watching him order!!order!! order!! all I can do I’ll hear that till my dying day! Sometimes I just go to YouTube to watch him! But I digress here is some information from the daily mail. 😁DM Cronyism row as Boris makes his own brother a peer alongside anti-Brexit ex-Tory chancellors Ken Clarke and Philip Hammond and Ian Botham - while Theresa May’s husband Philip gets a knighthood. Government publishes list of 36 new peers who will join the House of Lords.Boris Johnson is at the centre of a 'cronyism’ row after his brother was named. List is also headlined by England cricketing legend and Brexiteer Sir Ian Botham.Ruth Davidson, Philip Hammond Ken Clarke also set to join the upper chamber.Meanwhile, Theresa May’s husband Philip is set to be handed a knighthood. 😁End DM

tick tick bite!! ……………”

Oh I saw this in the paper today oh that tick in someone’s belly button gross! and then when I looked closer I realized it wasn’t belly button it was actually a hole in the skin was just absolutely terrible. OK here is I found it I found the article and here it is😁DM Two people in England are hospitalised after being diagnosed with rare infections spread by TICK bites.PHE confirmed case of babesiosis caused by parasite that infects red blood cells.Another patient has tick-borne encephalitis affecting the central nervous system.It’s the first UK-acquired babesiosis case and second of tick-borne encephalitis.😁End DM. So whether you’re in the UK or not chicks are no joke well chicks are no joke but if I said text I said chicks there we all text TICKS excellent! We finally got it kicks are no joke oh no it’s got kicks I think you all know we’re talking about ticks and the software is this software has been in a bad mood today. Anyways it is no joke! You need to remove them you could move remove them with a lit match or you can put alcohol around there or you can use tweezers to pull them but make sure you get the whole thing out of there. Check your clothes check everything and then give your scalp a feel to see if there’s anything in there if you’ve been out walking her out walking through the trees. If you have children you must do the same. If you have fur babies you absolutely must do the same. You must check them all the time give them a while you’re giving them cuddles just check for any ticks.Because you do not want to get Lyme disease or an infection. And if perhaps you miss it and you notice of a red mark kind of like a target about the size of a quarter and I don’t know in other countries if you have a quarter but you can look it up online you need to go to the doctor for antibiotics like pronto this and I am being serious here!

“doctor, what’s growing on my arm.” ……………

I almost posted this on my blog but I I was too embarrassed! But there’s a gentleman in the UK who had a bad infection in his perineum which is his personal area down to his anal area. He developed necrosis with his penis and it fell off. This is not a joke. But the doctors, after however many years of of him being deformed, have with his skin flaps on his arm they manage to fashion a sort of a penis. But for four years,this gentleman has had this appendage on his arm and at least the article I read there was no date of when that would be removed and then implanted In his genital area. Oh kids I don’t know, he said concealing it was a real challenge who can you imagine? Really but it’s amazing with medical science can do! I just hope sooner rather than later they can get that removed and put it where it belongs. They said in order for it to function in a sexual way he would need implants for that. But wow wow wow that’s quite the story and I almost put that on my blog but I didn’t.

Williams conservs film

Prince William to appear in new documentary about his conservation work. The Duke of Cambridge is expected to appear in a new documentary about his conversation work.

He has been filmed over two years for the ITV programme, which has been announced as part of the broadcaster’s new autumn schedule.Well if it’s anywhere near as good as the documentary they did for Princess Anne’s 70th birthday it will be amazing. I don’t know what that documentary or a picture of them is still on YouTube I saw them with you right away when it was posted so I would highly recommend that if you get a chance to see that I would highly recommend it! Now back to Prince William.In the documentary, he describes how his mission to give nature a voice has felt even more personal since he became a father. ITV has said about the documentary: “The Duke of Cambridge reveals that young people hold the key to a more positive future relationship with the environment, and that their determined drive to tackle climate change has made him an optimist. “He explains how his mission to give nature a voice has felt even more personal since he became a father and that he wants to leave behind a better world for future generations. Working together to protect the planet, he believes that local communities have the power to protect and repair the natural world on which we all depend.”William has attempted to tackle the illegal wildlife trade through his umbrella body United For Wildlife.For more than five years the organisation’s Transport Taskforce has been working to facilitate collaborations between the transport sector and law enforcement agencies to prevent wildlife trafficking. Information from standard.co.uk

GSTQAOBC 🇨🇦🇬🇧🇦🇺🇳🇿

———————

77. Aug 1

MM ANON ……… Archificial German tabloid …………… tic toc trumps Trump ………… arrested!! Conservatives shiver …………… Wills they score …………pubs or schools ……………Harry emojis only……………MMs big mistake ………… no room in the office …………… hands , face , pace ,????…………………Belgium 😱😱😱😱…………… GM dirty secrets …………… SAS 😱😱😱………. …… 🎼a- Louis Louis ‘ O’no You gotta go 🎼

Entertainment purposes

💜💜💜💜🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🌈🌈🌈🌈Thank you MM Anon🌈🌈🌈🌈😊😊😊😊💜💜💜💜

August1/2020

Riddle #77 CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT?!!?

Archificial German tabloid……………

Well she did it! It may not have been a British or a main stream tabloid as in North American. But she did it! She proved that the paparazzi were really in the drones are the drones we’re paparazzi.! Photos were taken secretly of Archficial! Photos of Meghan Markle and Prince Harry’s baby in their private garden were published by a magazine a week before the couple sued the paparazzi, Newsweek has learned. Well the usual German gossip rag manage to print manage to print these photos.Bunte, a German mass-market celebrity gossip weekly, ran the photo of Meghan’s mother Doria Ragland pushing 14-month-old Archie Mountbatten-Windsor on a plastic toy car.His face is clearly visible under a beige hat in the image, which appeared on the cover of the July 16 edition.This is the photo or these are the photos that we have discredited here on the blog Here is being photo shopped. There’s all kinds a question about those pictures that part of her arm is receiving and the angle and the especially in one picture of the black line around the bottom of the little Philly cop that the child is wearing is evident on one picture but not on the other. I’m just speaking from memory I haven’t looked at those pictures right now. The surrounding text asks: “How powerful is her mother?”

Inside, a similar photo was accompanied by a caption describing how Archie and his grandmother were playing in front of Tyler Perry’s villa, where Meghan and Harry have been

staying. Do you know Tyler Perry has been getting a whole lot of publicity for free. However when you were dealing with Madame, there is nothing that comes for free. Whether it’s money, your reputation or your very soul nothing is free there’s always a price and it’s usually a high high price! I thought for sure this magazine was called Das Bünde. Either way just as an aside it’s rather quite funny come on ha ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha. That’s what we used to call the cows cows that had a really colourful pattern, what causes always get names I mean that was a thing on the farm But not that I lived on the farm, but you know I knew about that….. Cows give better milk if they have a name. Goats respond to names to their very smart. Anyhow I just think it’s funny that magazine is called the same thing that causes to be called Bünte! In other words it’s very colourful flashy magazine! Or maybe it’s just drops a lot of cow patties terms of information ha ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha funny that’s funny? Can you believe it with all the emojis there is no cow emoji that’s just wrong moo moo ha ha ha ha ha! OK now the cows are going to start marching in the street saying cows lives matter ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha.

tic toc trumps Trump …………

Wow if this really happens there will be a revolt given the popularity of that platform wow!President Donald Trump said Friday night that he will ban the popular short-form video app TikTok from operating in the United States, rejecting a potential deal for Microsoft to buy the app from its Chinese-owned parent company. 😁Me.I think we must realize we are way past realizing the impact that China is having on all of us who live in a “free society“. And that’s just not all the cheap things we buy there when we go to the dollar store it’s a whole lot more than that. Huawei has been accused of using software or technological theft. As spoken many times of there that the owners daughter is being held here in Canada impressed in jail on a warrant from the United States. She’s working on fighting extradition. I would encourage anybody who has a Huawei phone to change it. There’s been all sorts of national security service concerns aboutSoftware service. You can read up for yourself about that but I would encourage you to educate yourself about that. There’s a reason why the president is standing firm in his stance against China. China owns most of Western Canada. They bought so much real estate in Vancouver at it it’s unbelievable. And we are just allowing this to happen. The horror that has and is happened in Hong Kong After the handover from the UK to China it was supposed to be one country two governments. It didn’t take but a year for them to renege on that and invade and they’ve they’ve abolish the constitution and arrested many people and so on and so on. End me.😁“As far as TikTok is concerned, we’re banning them from the United States,” Trump said to reporters while aboard Air Force One.Trump said he could use emergency economic powers or an executive order. It was not immediately clear what such an order would look like and what legal challenges it might face.”Well, I have that authority,” he said. Earlier on Friday, people working on the issue within the Trump administration expected the President to sign an order to force ByteDance, the Chinese company that owns the social media platform, to sell the US operations of TikTok, according to a person familiar with the matter. The move was aimed at resolving concerns by the policy makers, ( me😁and the rest of the free world!)that the foreign-owned TikTok may be a national security risk. I also think it’s an international security risk. (😁And who is who who are the ones that it’s most popular with young people. That’s the way to integrate into a society and start with the young.😁)The US government is conducting a national security review of TikTok and is preparing to make a policy recommendation to Trump, Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin told reporters this week at the White House.

arrested!! Conservatives shiver ……………

Senior Tory aka Consertaive, MP is arrested on suspicion of rape: Ex-minister is held in police custody after being accused of sex attacks on a Commons researcher in her twenties.A Tory MP was arrested last night on suspicion of raping a Commons researcher.The former Minister was being held in custody in an East London police station.His accuser, a woman in her 20s, was interviewed by Scotland Yard officer. Odd, in the whole article I’m reading, I can’t see the name of the MP. It is likely to increase pressure on Tory Chief Whip Mark Spencer, who failed to take action against the MP, who cannot be named for legal reasons, when he was told about the allegations a month ago. Why would you not have taken action? Why was he have sat idly by and done nothing? The former researcher, who cannot be identified, says she was assaulted four times between July 2019 and January this year, including claims of a rape necessitating hospital treatment. The Mail on Sunday was unable to contact the MP for his response to the allegations. As of last night, he had not been charged. More in the DM article if you want to read more about it. Do you know standing by and doing nothing when you possess such knowledge is almost a worse crime than the initial crime. He should be charged with oh what would it be, aiding and abetting? withholding of information? Withholding of criminal information? I think there’s a whole load of things he could’ve done and should’ve done! I hope he is fired! Post haste! Whether the MPis guilty or not that’s for the courts to decide but for him to sit idle on that information and do absolutely nothing that requires instant termination zero tolerance!

Wills they score …………Prince William reveals how he jumped on the sofa screaming with his children looking on in horror after Aston Villa were saved from relegation.Prince William watched Aston Villa being saved from Premier League relegation.He says his children had looked at him in horror as he was jumping off the sofa.The Duke said he wants clubs to ‘aspire to be much better’ around mental health. 😁Can you kids just imagine the scene Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha? they are all sitting and watching this on the TV and their father is all tense and they can see that. And then they’re saved from relegation and a huge like, you kids all know how men are when they get really excited and jumping and screaming and who knows what all else, he was doing carrying on so. Here is their usually calm, disciplined dad just going off the rails! He was having a Tom Cruise jumping on the sofas of the Oprah show! You kids remember that with Tom Cruise was crazy, well he still is,but when he went crazy in love with the oh Holmes oh what’s her name that girl that he ended up marrying and then having a child with. I forget her name, used to be on Dawsons creek, Katie was at Katie Holmes. Tom Cruise was jumping up and down on the sofa like a maniac and Oprah was interviewing him, it was just nuts. Anyway I am envisioning a scene kind a like that hilarious!!Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha.

pubs or schools ……………DM: SAGE ( 😁Scientific Advisory Group for Emergencies I added that in here because I always have to look up what does Sage meet again I always forget so I figured if I forget you guys do so I think it might help you if I put that in there😁)expert warns pubs could have to shut in trade-off to let schools reopen next month - as it’s revealed police have warned the ARMY might have to be called in to quell social unrest over local lock-downs.(😁does anyone else fear martial law? I am still coming in some of those cities in America where they’re rioting like Portland question! I don’t know what to quellsome of these antifa/BLM, I hate to use the word right again because they’re not riots they’re their attacks is what they are there their terrorist attacks!)Professor Graham Medley said watering holes (😁aka your local/pubs/bars/saloons, whatever you call it where you live) may need to close in order to get children back to classes.Boris Johnson yesterday warned coronavirus case numbers are ‘creeping up’ and he is ‘squeezing brake pedal’.He announced lockdown loosening planned for August 1 is being pushed back to August 15 'at the earliest’.That means reopening of casinos and bowling alleys is delayed while wedding receptions must also wait.PM also announced extension of face covering rules to include museums, galleries and places of worship. Professor Chris Whitty warned the UK has potentially reached a limit for how much of society can be opened up.This comes after partial lockdown reimposed on Greater Manchester and parts of Lancashire and West Yorkshire. Residents banned from meeting people they don’t live with in homes or gardens - but can still go to the pub.

Harry emojis only……………

And comes a time to add more insults to Prince Harry. Let’s drag him further through the mad shall we? Why not I’ve spent the last four 4 ½ years ripping him apart and every single possible way criticizing hurting every adjective under the sun so let’s just add some more.😁Prince Harry’s Dorky Texting Habits Were Revealed in a New Book.A new book has made some ‘stories’ about Prince Harry and Seahags time as senior royals, However Prince Harry still remains a senior royal, which is the article that I am greatly editing on does not acknowledge, including the report that Madam was reprimanded by palace officials over a necklace she wore early in their relationship. Beyond the insight into the Sussexes’ apparent frustrations over some of the media coverage over their relationship, however, the book also shares some interesting insight into Prince Harry’s supposed texting habits. Lies representatives truth in a in a down together thing with the cover in a bag with papers inside some cats on the colour book but I’m not calling it a book! allegedly allegedly allegedly,Prince Harry often sent Madam a perplexing emoji in the early days of their courtship.🤥🤥🤥🤥🤥🤥”His messages were often short and full of emojis, in particular the ghost emoji, which he often used instead of a smiley face,“ write the authors. “For what reason? Nobody knows. But Madam found his texting etiquette funny and adorable, just like the Prince."🤥🤥🤥🤥🤥Oh yet another dig and reason to laugh at him oh she’s disgusting absolutely disgusting!Who knew Prince Harry was an emoji man? Well you certainly don’t because your book is full of lies as madam is! You have no idea what he does on social media!. You have no idea how he texts or his interactions with his family and friends via his mobile phone! It’s all lies lies lies lies!🤥🤥🤥🤥🤥🤥🤥🤥🤥🤥🤥🤥🤥As the ‘book’s’, Ike sorry but I cannot dignify this piece of garbage by calling it a book! Nor can I call them authors!authors say, “nobody knows” why he thought the ghost emoji was a substitute for a smiley, but luckily for him, Madam was clearly charmed.Charmed?? Are you kidding me charmed? She lowered him and it was all a big plan there was absolutely no no charm involved!

MMs big mistake …………

She has made many mistakes due to her arrogance and her narcissism! However the biggest mistake was thinking that she could write this book anonymously and then deny being involved with it. She was thinking she would get the big sob story, I didn’t and she would be famouser, that’s the way I think she would say it I’m like I want to be famouser🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂🤣🤣. The book would be a best seller, make a lot of money and everybody would switch over and feel sorry for her. Well the opposite happened even some of the sugars are turning against her which I find hilarious. Her reputation is worse than it ever has been. She’s lost one part of the court case where she’s had to pay £67,000 in legal fees. The mail on Sunday lawsuit, another huge mistake on her part. But this, this “book“ was the biggest mistake hands down. She just does not think beyond the moment she does not think long term. in fact sometimes I question if she thinks at all I think she just acts reactively. Back to newtons law of physics every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Now she’s trying to bring princess Charlotte into it in the papers or it’s just disgusting. The book hasn’t even been officially released yet ha ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha exclamation! Well OK I’ll leave exclamation in there that’s that’s OK! Oh my my my my my. Most definitely her ego got in the way is it so often does. She’s so narcissistic she was just so convinced that, you know,telling her story from her side of the fence so to speak everyone would just fold over and just bow down to how horrible she’s been treated by that mean Queen and that mean royal family aren’t they just awful to her and Catherine didn’t give her a ride to the store she had to walk on no, oh poor girl. Well when she hired a photographer to take pictures of her a few years ago walking up and down in big rubber boots in her wellies in up and down to Kensington Palace gate so she was trying to enter at the exit she was so dumb she didn’t even know that. She most certainly didn’t seem to remind you that walking!! I think she’s done all city walking on streets or street walking or maybe standing on streets maybe threecorners I don’t know?🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂Oh what a gong show her life is oh my. Oh just wait the MOS is not going to settle this lawsuit they are not going to back down. And whatever comes out of GM and her case ,oh this is just the very beginning kids. We can even just start shopping for popcorn now, go get the best gourmet popcorn you can find and whatever toppings you like. I like your pickle topping if somebody wants to pick some of that up for me. I love dill pickles oh I love the pickles all they’re so good oh if you ever had just a dill pickle sandwich oh kids oh and a nice fresh grain bun ha ha Ha that’s so good anyways I digress there on ha ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha. Ha ha ha ha sorry about the kids I did digress I do digress oh my anyways. Yeah she’s she’s just I don’t I can’t imagine what kind of state she’s in right now I just can’t imagine. There was a song or a record years ago called sympathy for the devil well I have no sympathy for the devil and I have no sympathy for her.. She’s a big girl she made all the decisions all of her own throughout her whole life and she’s got herself where she is because she chose to be there!

no room in the office …………… This reminds me of the Bible verse no room in the Inn at Bethlehem and all the songs that came out of that. So who’s not wanted in the office that they are not willing to make room for? Workers will need to BOOK their place on the office lift to stop overcrowding at work.Chief executive Marc Benioff warned this is a 'new type’ of working environment.Employees will also be required to book a slot in order to travel between floors.Company employs 2,000 staff in the UK, mostly at London’s Heron Tower.All I can find our articles about how people working from home during the lockdown will continue for many people and officers will be empty. And that they will have trouble filling the officers with workers because of that. And the domino effect if that’s going to have another industry is like the shops around there and the coffee shops etc. so no room in the office you stumped me here no room in the office. I can think of Madam them not wanting her anywhere near the offices when she was in London or the UK. I can think of Prince Harry not having room in her offices now. Then of course it’s always the office television show which is always good for a laugh. You have stumped me MM anon I said uncle,I say uncle, I have spent about an hour and a half researching that I cannot find anything you stumped me!

hands , face , pace ,????…………………Evening Express😁Boris Johnson urges people to remember ‘hands, face, space’ slogan. The Government’s Sage (Scientific Advisory Group for Emergencies) committee discussed data on July 2 which suggested “a gradual decline in self-reported hand-washing frequency over the course of the epidemic” and said it is “worth revisiting behavioural interventions to increase uptake”. It comes after the Government was accused of creating confusion around new rules issued late on Thursday for parts of northern England.At a press conference on Friday, Mr Johnson said: “The only real utensil we have (in) controlling the spread of this new virus is human behaviour, and the only way we can encourage people to behave in one way or the other is through advice.”And so you’re totally right, we need to keep it as simple as we possibly can and that’s why, to sum it up in a nutshell, is: hands, face, space. “Wash your hands, cover your face in the settings that we had mentioned and keep your distance from other people where you don’t know them, you’re coming into contact with them for the first time, and of course get a test and self-isolate if you have symptoms.“I hope that was pretty… you know, that was pretty punchy I think – hands, face, space, and get a test.”I think everybody can more or less remember that.” I think there’s a lot of people pacing up and down right now just trying to cope with everything. And I’m sure there’s many in the government that are pacing trying to cope with the demands. A lot of sleepless nights for a lot of people and pacing up and down the hallway. 'Hands, face, space… knees and toes’: Boris Johnson unveils new government coronavirus slogan - but is accused of making it up as it’s compared to a children’s song.

Belgium 😱😱😱😱……………

Covid-19 infections in Belgium are 12 times higher than reported!

Almost 800,000 people in Belgium have been infected with the coronavirus SARS-CoV-2 since the start of the global pandemic – 12 times more than reported in official figures, according to a study carried out by the university of Antwerp.At the same time, another study reveals that health care personnel are 3.5 times more likely to become infected than the population as a whole. The study examined blood samples collected since the end of March and concluded that if the results are extrapolated to the entire population, 7% of people or a total of 782,000 have been infected.

“Our analysis may even be an underestimate,” said epidemiologist Professor Pierre Van Damme, who led the study with Dr Heidi Theeten.By comparison, the official figures produced by the health institute Sciensano count a total of 68,000 infections since the disease appeared. According to the study, the discrepancy shows the number of people who are carrying the virus without knowing it.”Clearly we are missing a lot of cases of infection,” Prof. Van Damme said. “We searched globally and randomly for antibodies in our research, but in Belgium’s infection hot-spots, the figures may exceed the 7% that we discovered.”In another study, published in The Lancet, (😁mewhich is a well regarded medical magazine or publication!)researchers examined information supplied by users of a smartphone app in the UK and the US, and concluded that health care professional were 3.4 times more likely to become infected than users in general.The incidence of infection among health care workers was 2,747 per 100,000, compared with 242 for the general population of users. However when the numbers are adjusted for factors such as access to tests, the researchers arrived at a figure for the professionals of 823.And in fact, the increased risk was even greater in ethnic minority, black and Asian users, regardless of their medical history. Among the general population, the increased likelihood was 2.5 times greater, while among minority healthcare workers the difference was 1.8 times greater. “Our results confirm the structural inequalities in the face of Covid-19,” the authors said. “Minority caregivers were more likely to work in riskier clinical environments, with suspected or confirmed Covid patients, and had less access to adequate protective equipment.”Alan Hope,The Brussels Times

GM dirty secrets …………… The Telegraph Epstein’s former housekeeper tells Helen Kirwan-Taylor gives a glimpse into the exclusive world of Manhattan elite circles😁I was in Ghislaine Maxwell’s little black book - and know the dark secrets of her New York life. I’ve been using that face to differentiate between the information I find online and me my comments. I hope that’s helpful. Also I should know that we share that I was not the one saying I was in a little Black book.😁

As a New Yorker who married a Brit, I learned how someone with the money could enter the elite circle of the Epstein-linked socialite. I must have received half a dozen excited phone calls. “I hear you’re on the list?!” they said, hardly able to contain their excitement. The list, as most people now know, is Jeffrey Epstein’s ‘little black book’, curated for him by socialite Ghislaine Maxwell and containing the names and addresses of who’s who in both London and New York. It first emerged in 2012 (when Epstein’s former housekeeper was arrested by the FBI while trying to to sell it) and was published on Gawker.com a few years later, along with the flight logs for his private jet, nicknamed the ‘Lolita…😁Well apparently that’s all the information that’s a telegraph will allow me to read and copy without paying. So c’est la vie!😁NY POST A trove of documents related to Ghislaine Maxwell’s sex life and her alleged crimes that were scheduled to be released Monday will be kept secret for the time being, an appeals court ruled Friday.The Second Circuit Court of appeals granted a stay filed by Maxwell’s attorneys, who have fought tooth-and-nail to keep the files that relate to her deposition in a now settled-defamation case from the public.The documents will be kept secret until at least Sept. 22, when the circuit will hear Maxwell’s appeal.The documents were ordered unsealed by Judge Loretta Preska last week, but she granted Maxwell’s attorneys a week to file an appeal to block their release.

On Thursday, a separate batch of documents in the case were released. They included graphic details about Maxwell’s alleged sex-obsessed life with pedophile Jeffrey Epstein before her arrest earlier this month.😁me now. Oh dearie me, I can only imagine what is in those files if they’re fighting tooth and nail. Actually you know something I probably can’t even imagine the whore of what’s in there but a whore ha ha actually I what l said was the horror, the horror that’s in there. I’m gonna leave that mistake in software typing there because that’s actually quite true about this woman. It’s just is so evil, it’s just so evil it’s and comes from such a dark dark dark source. This use of children and recruiting children is just beyond the pale. There’s a scripture verse that says,Suffer the little children to come unto me for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. And I do believe that sins against children, but the Bible says all sins they are the same in the sight of God what a sin is a sin is a sin. I firmly believe that sins against the innocent like children or people who have mental disorders or animals or anybody who’s vulnerable those those are worse,those those are worse. They are the worst of the worst!

SAS 😱😱😱………. ……

Secret court papers claim ‘rogue SAS Afghanistan execution squad’ carried out a series of night-time killings in Afghanistan. Documents in British court show concerning allegations about an SAS unit.Elite soldiers involved in killings of 33 people in night raids on Afghan homes.Circumstances of the incidents where captured Afghan men have attacked with grenades and AK47s ‘against impossible odds’ have been called suspicious.Evidence was withheld from earlier proceedings by the government. Extreme allegations that a 'rogue’ SAS unit carried out night missions in which they executed civilians in villages in Afghanistan have come to light in court documents.The trove of secret files was previously withheld from an ongoing High Court legal case by the government, causing a judge to demand an explanation from SecDef ie Secretary of Defense, Ben Wallace. The Communications from within high ranks of the special forces reveal a huge concern for the killings of over 33 Afghan people in 11 different night raids on homes by the same unit.This is absolutely terrible news. One wonders with all the circumstances where and who ordered this must’ve come up from very high high command for an order like this. They must’ve had suspicion is they were certain actors are that they were after. Funny how that word actor has changed from Hollywood used to using that word instead of terrorists or criminal or whatever they call calling them now a bad actor. I am referring to the person who does bad acts. I don’t know when that first came into common usage. But it’s been at least two years maybe even longer that even using that phrase. At least here in North America I am not sure how it is in the UK but definitely here that’s been the common use.

🎼a- Louis Louis ‘ O’no You gotta go 🎼

This is a song in 1955 by Richard Berry. But it was a huge hit in 1963 by the Kingsmen. This is a standard song or any social or dance whatever we are used to be I said that used to be ha ha Ha ha ha oh boy when I was young ha ha ha ha. Louis and the song is actually spelled LOUIE.. So it seems to be to me rather that this would be about Prince Louis.OK when someone says you gotta go that means you have to go see Mrs. Murphy, we used to say that at work when we have to go to the bathroom, I have to go check on Mrs. Murphy. well he might be about the age of potty training but I can’t imagine that that would be in the news. I know that they were on holiday. of interest,

Louie Louie (The Song) … The FBI was asked to investigate whether or not those involved with the song violated laws against the interstate transportation of obscene material. The limited investigation lasted from February to May 1964 and discovered no evidence of obscenity.

Let’s go back to Prince Louis. I wonder if this doesn’t refer to him starting nursery school or some sort of whatever it’s called there because I was doing some research and this is what I came up with. I wonder if that’s not what does this.What age is preschool in UK?Preschool (US and UK) from 2 to 5 years old- held in a Nursery School; readiness has to do with whether the child is developmentally appropriate, potty training is a big factor, so a child can start as early as 2 years old. All they’re all growing up so fast and they all Time goes so fast!

GSTQAOBC 🇨🇦🇬🇧🇦🇺🇳🇿

—————-

78. Aug 2

The photo goes with the clue a bigger splash!

💜🙏🏻😊🌈😊🙏🏻💜PG INTERPRETATION OF MM ANON💜🙏🏻😊🌈😊🙏🏻💜

MM Anon

MM ANON …… Victoriiahhhhhhh………. Over 50’ what!!!………………return to the office??…………Drop Shipping ……………… mixed messages 😱😱……………90 minute wonder………………Dragged away’ She’s dyingm!! …………A bigger splash……………… No suspension …a major incident …………… HMTQ ‘ no comment.

Aug 02/20

💜💜💜💜🌈🌈🌈😊😊😊😊Thank you MM Anon😊😊😊😊🌈🌈🌈💜💜💜💜

August 2/2020. Riddle #78

Victoriiahhhhhhh……….

This reminds me of the movie, A Streetcar Named Desire. The character played by Marlon Brando, stands at the bottom of the stairs and yells Stella! Stella! This is not the usual spelling of Victoria it has two eyes and 7H’s. Victoria is a rule doesn’t have an H in it and it doesn’t have two eyes. Charlotte Tilbury named a lipstick after her, very Victoria, l have it. Her husband David has spent tens and tens of millions bailing out her “ fashion“ business. No the classy woman that she is, she’s trying a new venture. Victoria Beckham denies plans to ‘sell sex toys’ as she prepares to rival Gwyneth Paltrow’s $250m Goop empire with new lifestyle brand. Boy I was just waiting for a new business like this to come out. I was all that we’ve been dealing with and 2020 this is exactly what we need right sex toys yeah right give me a break! People out of work no money to buy sex toys this is disgusting!! A report had alleged the fashion mogul, 46, was looking to match the 47-year-old actress’ company in ‘every way’ and had trademarked the initials 'VB’ for her exciting venture.Hitting back at the reports, a source close to the business exclusively told MailOnline: 'This is absolutely not true! There are no plans to sell sex toys!' Even tell you the things that Gwyneth Paltrow is selling good gracious. You can research it for yourself if you want to know. On her new brand, a source told The Sun earlier this month: 'The Beckhams are huge in the States. Victoria’s products are likely to be lapped up and provide her with a lucrative leap into the international market.'Victoria already boasts a host of beauty products to her name, after launching an eponymous brand to complement her fashion label. On Thursday, it was reported that Victoria had to axe 20 staff at her loss-making fashion label to 'future-proof’ it after the pandemic - just months after reversing plans to furlough employees.

Over 50’ what!!!………………

Madam’s birthday is on 4 August. I do believe her true age is over 50! And someone has just found that out and they’re absolutely shocked! I wonder if some thing public will come tomorrow on her birthday to reveal her true age! Wouldn’t that be something , just the perfect birthday present!!ha ha ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha oh kids would that not be just the perfect wonderful birthday present FOR ALL OF US,with it oh my! 🎁 I was going to put 50 candles here but I’m not sure how many more than 50 it would take! maybe someone will hire an airplane and it will carry a banner behind it say happy 55th birthday 🎁 🍰 🎂 Madam!

return to the office??…………

Oh this is like the clue that drove me nuts yesterday in the riddle, that after 90 minutes researching, I never did solve, no room in the office. However, this is the big battle, are people going to stay working from home or are they going to return to the offices. As I said before office building sit empty and the lost revenue to power services through lights and electricity. The lost revenue to businesses in the area. Lost revenue to restaurants in the area. Lost revenue to mass transit. It’s a domino effect, it’s not just a matter of all,you know what will work from home and it’s safer and it’s cheaper and all that so it’s a whole huge cog wheel that turns. It is like a mobile, if you take off one piece, not a mobile phone kids, a mobile that hangs over babies beds. Got all these things hanging from it that are of interest to the baby. But they can be decorative too. It’s like taking off one piece of that it doesn’t hang properly it doesn’t move properly and it needs all the pieces in order to function properly. So the government is wanting people to go, ordering people to go back to work some are refusing and some companies are refusing to comply with that. They would rather have people working from home, there’s less sick time and it seemed to work fine. It’s funny, it seems like when when things don’t work like usual and then people kind of like it that way, the government just has a fit. I think back to the early 90s where the government was cutting nursing money. So what they did is they gave us every Friday off and where I was working at the time I had a Monday to Friday job which is very rare in nursing. And so we got a long weekend every weekend. It was, you know, the first feel like that’s like a loss of 20% of our income but then it got to be pretty nice. Your mental health was better, an extra day off, you have a long weekend and you could do stuff with friends and family. Then they started to realize people were liking this and they took that away but then we still have to lose a day but it couldn’t be so it would be of benefit to us. They were just plug it in anywhere in the middle of our schedule and we wouldn’t necessarily know until the day before. So that that’s how government operates in my experience.

Drop Shipping ……………… 📦

Drones will be used to deliver coronavirus tests and medical supplies to remote regions under plans that allow for safe 'air corridors’ to be set up for them to fly in.Operators are currently banned from flying drones outside their sight line.The Civil Aviation Authority will relax measures to ensure contactless deliveries.Drones will be used to deliver medical supplies and PPE to hospitals.In remote regions, this will speed up the transport of essential goods.

mixed messages 😱😱……………MM Anon Every riddle there is one clue that I just can’t solve , well at LEAST one but always one that sticks out exceptionally!!and it drives me Squirrley! Madam’s 'proud to be feminist’ biography statement and references to her charity work as a child are DELETED from the Royal Family’s website - and replaced with details of her move to US with Prince Harry. So if she will or isn’t she? Is she part of the family or isn’t she? These are mixed messages definitely! Her whole biography is removed! I’m not complaining but these are mixed messages is she or isn’t she is she or isn’t she?The Royal Family’s official website have deleted large chunks of The Duchess of Sussex’s biography, The Sun reports.The page, which details senior members of the royal family’s background and duties, no longer contains large parts of Madam’s history!References to women’s empowerment and her work in a soup kitchen from the age of 13-17 have been deleted! Second line of the 'About The Duchess of Sussex’ section now references her move to America with Prince Harry, 35, stating: 'As announced in January, The Duke and Duchess have stepped back as senior members of The Royal Family’!! She is slowly being erased bit by bit by bit by bit. It won’t be hard to Photoshop her out of Prince Louis’ christening photos, just she’s on the corner there and the other family picture taken outdoors, I forget what that occasion was, it won’t be hard at all to get her photo shopped out of there. Yes they are giving us mixed messages,but if we read the clues and we pay attention, there’s no mixed signal, they’re telling us exactly what’s happening without coming out and saying it.

90 minute wonder………………

MM Anon did you put this here to tease me because I spent 90 minutes 🕰🕰yesterday on that clue no room in the office and still couldn’t find a proper answer? Did you did you did you???😁😁😁🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂

What a musician or singer has one to one song that successful in their career nothing else to call them a one hit wonder. This is a 90 minute wonder. This Has to be Madam for her performance in A Woman For All Treasons, 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂instead of A Man For All Seasons! 😂😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣 hey we have to laugh or we would go mad this is all such a terrible situation! ViacomCBS-backed U.K. broadcaster aired a 90-minute documentary on madam’s father. Thomas Markle.Madam and her husband???, is he still her husband?,Prince Harry sparked a global media frenzy with their decision not to continue as senior members of the British Royal Family. Buckingham Palace announced that the couple are to lose their royal titles of “His Royal Highness” and “Her Royal Highness”.Harry broke his silence revealing that the couple had “no other option.” He didn’t say this is what I wanna do he didn’t say I had this is the one thing that will make me happy this is not the thing that my heart is calling me to do. He said there’s no other option. Now if that doesn’t sound like a special ops comment I don’t know what does! you take your list of options of how to get it out of the situation and you choose the path of least resistance!Produced by Alaska TV, Channel 5’s “Thomas Markle: My Story” had access to Markle over six days at his home in Mexico in October 2019, and returned there to film his reaction to his daughter and son-in-law’s decision to step back from Royal duties. So daddy Markle is a 90 minute Wonder, wow he puts his head up every now and then again to let it let us know he still got his fingers in the pie.OR THIS FROM THE DM.New 'lifesaving’ tests to transform the war on coronavirus: 90-minute checks will be rolled out for the NHS next week - and then used to routinely screen Britons with no symptoms.Two new coronavirus tests will be offered to millions of Britons from next week. The tests, which give results in 90 minutes, will first be introduced to the NHS.Health Secretary Matt Hancock described the move as 'lifesaving’ on Sunday. One is so simple it could soon be deployed in airports, offices, schools, pubs and restaurants – bringing testing to the bulk of the population.

The companies involved would not reveal the cost but claim it is similar or cheaper to current tests – which are around £18 privately but less to the NHS.Health Secretary Matt Hancock last night described the move as 'lifesaving’ as the Government looks to avert a second wave of the disease, prevent the need for draconian lockdowns and restart the stalled economy.

The two tests will initially be introduced in the NHS and care homes before being made available more widely over the next few months.

Unlike current tests given mainly to patients who already think they have the virus, the new methods will be used to routinely screen members of the public who show no symptoms.

Officials hope they will flag up local outbreaks before they take hold, avoiding the need for local lockdowns such as that imposed in the North West last week.

Dragged away’ She’s dyingm!! ……. 🏥 🥼 👮 👮 🚔

I saw this and read this yesterday and then again I almost posted this on my blog but it was too agonizing. This poor little girl is laying in her bed, fighting for her life, near dying and her parents have been fighting for her to continue to be treated. Her father is a doctor, a well-known respiratory specialist and his wife is a former doctor so they’re not, they are no dummies. They know exactly they know what doctors do in the medical profession. I forget the chronic illness their daughter has, but they’ve been fighting to keep her getting treatment and they want her to have steroid treatment. The doctors have been wanting to stop all treatment several times but they have continued at the behest of the family. But this week they had a meeting and they said they Basically told the parents that they were not going to continue to comply with her wishes to treat their daughter. I guess at that point,understandably,the parents would be upset and allegedly the father shoved the doctor that told him this.I forget the quote, I mean it put the article in here after I finish, but he said something rude to the father like get over it man or get real or something like that. Anyways long the short of it the parents are back to the daughters bed and within a few moments police officers arrive. In the video and the photos are agonizing of them handcuffed,dragging them both,mother and father,away from the child bedside. While they’re doing this, father of the child has a massive heart attack and has to be taken to emergency and had to have an angioplasty the next day. Just horrific just absolutely horrific! here is just one link there’s many many many links you can choose to read but this is one for you to read.

https://news.sky.com/story/couple-to-take-legal-action-after-father-was-removed-from-dying-daughters-bedside-12041332

A bigger splash……………… 🌊 🦈

You thought the shark attack in Maine was bad and that was a big shark. Wow just wait to read this. A man in his 20s was attacked by a massive four-metre great white shark at a popular surfing spot - before his board is brought to shore with a massive chunk bitten out of it.Emergency services were called to Bunker Bay in south-west WA around 2.15pm.The surfer was airlifted to Royal Perth Hospital after the shark bit him in the leg.A shocking image showed how the man’s board was bitten in half in the attack. 'Three guys that were close to him they started to paddle towards him… he was already off his board trying to push the board into the shark.

'Those three guys got him onto the beach… everyone came together, there were guys off calling triple-0 on their phones straight away,’ one man explained. A helicopter was sent to the popular beach and the surfer was airlifted to Royal Perth Hospital.The extent of the man’s injuries are not yet known. ‘He’s just sitting on his board and the next thing you know we just heard someone go 'shark’. This is a picture of what’s left of his surfboard whole that is frightening.! OR THIS FROM THE DM. Tragedy as hero father dies after saving his three children when they got caught in a rip-tide off Welsh beach and 18-year-old is found dead in river at beauty spot.Man in his 30s died after being flown to Ysbyty Gwynedd, Bangor this afternoon.Witnesses reported children in difficulty in water and a man swam to their aid.Two of the children were taken to hospital for treatment after Barmouth incident.A hero father in his 30s has died 'after rescuing his three children when they got caught in a rip tide’ on the Welsh coast and in a separate incident an 18-year-old was found dead in a river at a beauty spot in North Yorkshire.North Wales Police confirmed the man, said to be on holiday in the area, died after being pulled from the water and flown to Ysbyty Gwynedd, Bangor on Sunday. Witnesses said three children had got into difficulty in the water near Barmouth and a man understood to be their father had jumped into the water to bring them ashore.

31404976-8579627-image-a-18_1596185547242.jpeg

No suspension … ⚖️ ⚖️

This is referring to the MP who has been accused of rape by a young woman. His name is not been named. He has not lost his job he has not been suspended. I’m all for innocence before proven guilty before a trial but a suspension at the very least.Local Tory party gives senior MP arrested on suspicion of rape its '100% support’ – as pressure grows to suspend the former minister.A Tory MP was arrested last night on suspicion of raping a Commons researcher.The former Minister was being held in custody in an East London police station.His accuser, a woman in her 20s, was interviewed by Scotland Yard officers. Labour MP Jess Phillips has criticised Tories for failing to suspend the whip. The Conservatives were under mounting pressure yesterday after refusing to suspend the ex-minister who is alleged to have assaulted a former parliamentary aide and forced her to have sex.

She claims that she was left so traumatised by their relationship last year that she ended up in hospital.

A major incident…..Government will start testing sewage to track coronavirus and could ban domestic travel to try and stop local outbreaks. Would you kids want that job? Testing sewage? Oh dearie me!🥺 Infected people shed Covid material in their faeces soon after symptoms appear. Trials at 44 sites showed technique was successful and it will now be rolled out. Came as Number 10 considered banning travel in and out of lockdown areas. I could make a joke about what kind of job this is but it would be a bit crude.

Environment Secretary George Eustice said the measure would give officials a 'head start’ on tackling further outbreaks. A wave of localised flare-ups across England has prompted the PM to discuss radical proposals to shake up its crisis response. This could include banning travel in and out of areas with high infections as part of a 'flexible’ strategy to avoid another national lockdown that would derail the economic recovery. The notion of locking down London was touted in March when the capital bore the brunt of cases. It could be resurrected again in the event of a second wave, with the lockdown area defined by the M25.DM

HMTQ ‘ no comment. 👑

What can and can’t the Queen do under lockdown at Balmoral? We all know that her Majesty, the Queen,regularly loves to attend chapel every Sunday. This is no different when she’s at Balmoral.Here are some of the guidelines she will have to follow and she has made no comments about because she wouldn’t she keeps calm and carries on. The Queen’s visit to Balmoral Castle this summer is likely to be different from normal due to the coronavirus restrictions in place.A Buckingham Palace spokesman said arrangements for the visit in early August “will be in line with the relevant guidelines and advice”.Visitors from two other households will be able to meet her at a time at Balmoral, under current Scottish Government rules, with a recommendation for a maximum of eight people at a time when inside. This is only possible with social distancing and “strict hygiene measures”.Guidance indicates four other households will be able to meet the Queen at a time when outside – but with no more than 15 people in total in the group. For both indoors and outdoors, a cap of four households a day has been put in place. Crathie Kirk – a regular place of worship of the royal family when they are in residence at the estate – is among the places of worship subject to rules allowing communal prayer for a maximum of 50 people, with two-metre distancing in place.The Queen will not be able to enjoy the Braemar Gathering as she traditionally does, as coronavirus forced the Highland games to be called off for the first time since 1945. It is also unlikely the monarch will be able to host her annual Ghillies Ball, which takes place in the estate’s grand ballroom.The event is a dance for her neighbours, estate and castle staff during her summer stay at Balmoral but would contravene the current rules on gatherings.The Scottish Government is set to review lockdown measures next Thursday but First Minister Nicola Sturgeon warned at her briefing on Wednesday not to expect the easing of many more restrictions.Currently, face coverings are mandatory across Scotland in circumstances where physical distancing is not easy to maintain.PA MEDIA/UK NEWS. I guess if the Buckingham Palace spokesman made a statement, that would be on behalf of her Majesty.Her Majesty the Queen, has made no public statement regarding Madam or Prince Harry before her holiday to Balmoral. We all know something imminently is going to happen. We also know that she is the one that is in charge. So when the time comes, we will know and if she feels like she needs to speak to us or make a statement she will. I wish her an excellent vacation good health and good happiness and good hunting and good fishing!!GSTQAOBC 🇨🇦🇬🇧🇦🇺🇳🇿

————-

79. Aug 3

This photo goes with the Prince Louis Louis Clue

MM Anon

MM ANON …… HOW old !!🤣🤣🤣……………… eat out to ( put on pounds)……………GO BACK TO work……………🎼PRINCE ‘ Louis Louis 🎼…………… a result in 90 mins. …………… very HUME-an………… MM , mendacious,cheat, grifter yacht puta ,, plagiarist, druggy, petulant, dubious ,provenance!!………… “ never returning BP” ……………Hackers🐻🐻🐻…………………Windsor home!!

Entertainment purposes

💜🙏🏻😊🌈✝️🌈😊🙏🏻💜Thank you so much dear MM Anon💜🙏🏻😊🌈✝️🌈😊🙏🏻💜

August 3/2020

Riddle #79 can you believe that at 79 already? Wowza! Wowza!

HOW old !!🤣🤣🤣………………

Well the old SEAHAG is having a birthday tomorrow. Apparently she’s throwing herself at $200,000 birthday party, well isn’t that special Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha!I remember very clearly August 4, 1982 was the day that Prince William was christened. I was waiting,I collected everything and I was waiting for the papers and the pictures and I still have them in my scrapbook. I’m a little offended that this woman has the nerve to have a birthday in the same month as me! 🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐Somehow that’s just wrong so so so very wrong in so many ways!🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 however with her as you know she never tells the truth about anything. Her age fluctuates, kind a like the weather it’s just up-and-down up-and-down and up-and-down. Just like her Wikipedia page that changes too ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Hey, but isn’t it awesome that her part on the royal family’s official website has been very! very!very! very! well edited! NO MORE HRH😁😁😁😁😁😁 Do you know something? I’ve got it now!😁I got it!😁I’ve got it!😁That is her 🎁 present for her birthday from her Majesty and Lord Geidt! That was an awesome gift! I only wish I had thought of something that clever🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂😂😂! Maybe they’ll even give her another gift and they’ll edit her out of Prince Louis’ christening photo! That would be the icing on the 🎂 cake! 🕯 I hope it’s going to be a big cake because they’re going to need a lot of candles! For my cake 🎂, to all of you have already started baking it, I’m going to need 54 candles😁😁😁😁. We used to always have a spice cake for our birthday that mum made and then we would have, what was called birthday icing.It’s a seven minute icing, where you boil brown sugar and butter and you beat up egg whites and then you mix it together. But if it’s a very humid day, it doesn’t turn out well before that’s a lovely combination ….great memories, 😢☺️😊💜💜💜great memories! And my mum used to wrap coins in wax paper. Quarters, nickels, dimes and pennies,we still had pennies are that time. She would put it in the cake in the batter around all around. As it baked, the coins would stay in the bottom of the cake and that way when everybody would get near to the end of eating their piece, they would get a surprise. It would be a penny a dime a nickel or quarter. For kids today, that would be nothing. I’m thinking that Madam might be around the same age as me! Although my skin is much nicer, way, way, way nicer! Firstly because I actually wash my face like with soap and water! I know that’s a new concept! Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha😂😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣I use Prai neck and décolletage or neck and deck as they call it sometimes. I use Korres olive oil line, FANTASTIC! I use L’Occitane either almond oil or verbena is my new favourite shower gel! Hey if I can afford the things she certainly can! I would find it extremely hilarious if tomorrow and all of the papers her actual age was revealed! That would be a birthday gift for all of us ha ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha!

eat out to ( put on pounds)……………

Oh I saw the pictures today in the daily mail!! About the amount of food you can get!

Dinner’s on Rishi! Crowds of customers turn streets into outdoor diners as packed restaurants overflow into the road on the first night of the Chancellor’s 50% discount deal.72,000 restaurants, pubs and cafes across Britain are offering half-price meals to diners from today.The offer is only available between Mondays and Wednesdays when eating in and is capped at £10.McDonald’s, Nando’s, Pizza Express and Costa Coffee are involved in scheme backed by taxpayers.Thousands of independent venues including 40 Michelin-starred restaurants are also taking part.The Prime Minister Boris Johnson has been losing weight and he along with the medical profession have been encouraging people, especially over 50, to lose weight. It decreases their Covid risk or let me rephrase that it decreases its severity of their course of illness if they do get COVID-19. With this Cheap food, you’ve got the free food basically it’s unbelievable how much you can get. There are some pictures on there it’s just you just go take a look it’s unbelievable!Restaurants were tonight heaving with customers dining out on discounts after the government launched its half-price meals scheme to breathe life back into the beleaguered hospitality industry. Rishi Sunak’s Eat Out To Help Out programme, which gives people £10 per head off their bill, drew crowds to both high-end venues and fast-food outlets alike.More than 90 chains including McDonald’s, Nando’s, Pizza Express and Costa Coffee are among the 72,000 eateries taking part in the scheme, which allows them claim back the lost money from the Treasury.

GO BACK TO work……………

OK why are those first three words all capitals and then work is an all lowercase. Lots of people have found working at home is working much better for the life as a whole and don’t want to return to the normal 9 to 5 so to speak office environments. It saves and having to buy work clothes fighting with the public transportation and the risk of catching Covid and just the commuting time. yet again you’ve done it I just I don’t I cannot figure out why those three words are in. Given everything in the daily mail today with everything like en Fuego aka on fire 🔥 with Covid-19,it doesn’t look like there’s going to be any government mandates for people to go back to work anytime soon! It is almost as if you are you’re saying to somebody go back to where you came from and you’re really angry about it and then you cannot finish the sentence so you say, work. Daily Mail So much for Britain’s back-to-work day! Nearly five in six office employees will stay at home today despite official drive to get staff back at their desks, survey reveals.An audit of 30 of the UK’s biggest firms found 17 per cent would travel to work.Boris Johnson heralded today as first day the ‘work from home'guidance ends.Britons can go back to the workplace at the ‘discretion’ of their employers. Almost five in six office employees will stay at home today despite the Government’s drive to get staff to return to their workplaces.A Mail audit of 30 of Britain’s biggest firms, representing 320,000 employees, found that just 17 per cent of office-based staff would travel to work this week.

Boris Johnson heralded the first Monday in August – as the day ‘work from home’ guidance ends and Britain should return to the office.

The Guardian.Few workers heed Boris Johnson’s plea to get back to offices.Places in Birmingham and Canary Wharf in London deserted despite call to return after Covid lockdown.

Boris Johnson’s plea that people “should be going back to work” in offices across England from Monday appeared to have gone unheeded in central Birmingham.

In the Colmore business district, which normally has 35,000 workers, most office blocks were largely deserted and at the city’s train stations at rush hour only a handful of people sauntered out, mostly heading to work in shops or hospitals rather than to office-based jobs.Johnson had said it was “important people should be going back to work now”, but even he seemed to struggle to lead by example. The prime minister left his office in Downing Street after lunchtime and spent most of the day working from his country residence at Chequers.Among the roughly two dozen people the Guardian spoke to in Birmingham on Monday morning, only two were on the way back to office work for the first time since the coronavirus lockdown.Radha Heera said she was “excited but very nervous” about heading back to her desk at West Midlands police headquarters after almost five months at home. It was not only her first day back at work but the first time she had left her house in Wolverhampton because she had been shielding for medical reasons.

🎼PRINCE ‘ Louis Louis 🎼……………

I did the spiel about the song oh yesterday or the day before you can flip over back there and read it if you like. The most adorable new photo of Prince Louis today was in the cards,the thank you cards that were sent to people who had wished him a happy birthday. He is all over the Middleton, my goodness he is pulling strong for the Middleton side of the family. He is a handsome little boy wow not the George is not, but he certainly is very very well representing the Middletons! I want to try and add that picture in like I did yesterday with the surfboard picture.I’m going to see if it will add. It will probably be at the top of the riddle but then there will be a big blank space here, but at least you’ll get to see it. 😁Now from the daily mail. Oh, brother! Prince Louis, two, looks just like Prince George in new photo released to thank royal fans for their birthday well-wishes.The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge released an unseen photo of Prince Louis. They shared the photo to thank royal fans for their well-wishes on his second birthday. The photo, , taken by his mum, shows Louis grinning at the camera.It was taken at the same time as photos released to mark the occasion in April.

a result in 90 mins. ……………

New ‘lifesaving’ tests to transform the war on coronavirus: 90-minute checks will be rolled out for the NHS next week - and then used to routinely screen Britons with no symptoms.Two new coronavirus tests will be offered to millions of Britons from next week. The tests, which give results in 90 minutes, will first be introduced to the NHS.Health Secretary Matt Hancock described the move as ‘lifesaving’ on Sunday. One is so simple it could soon be deployed in airports, offices, schools, pubs and restaurants – bringing testing to the bulk of the population.

The companies involved would not reveal the cost but claim it is similar or cheaper to current tests – which are around £18 privately but less to the NHS.Health Secretary Matt Hancock described the move as 'lifesaving’ as the Government looks to avert a second wave of the disease, prevent the need for draconian lockdowns and restart the stalled economy.

The two tests will initially be introduced in the NHS and care homes before being made available more widely over the next few months.

Unlike current tests given mainly to patients who already think they have the virus, the new methods will be used to routinely screen members of the public who show no symptoms.

Officials hope they will flag up local outbreaks before they take hold, avoiding the need for local lockdowns such as that imposed in the North West last week.

very HUME-an…………

This reminds me of the 90s song I’m only human but I can’t think of the band, I’m only human, of flesh and blood l am made. Anyone who knows who sang that song can you put it in the comments for me please,it’s going to drive me nuts.

John Hume, a Northern Irish Catholic leader and Nobel Peace laureate, dies at 83. The veteran civil rights campaigner was credited with kick-starting peace negotiations.John Hume, a key Roman Catholic architect of Northern Ireland’s 1998 Good Friday peace agreement who won the Nobel Peace Prize for his role in ending 30 years of sectarian violence, died on Monday at the age of 83, his SDLP party said.Hume, a veteran civil rights campaigner credited with kick-starting peace negotiations in a British region convulsed by bloodshed in the early 1990s, shared the Peace Prize with Northern Ireland’s then-first minister, David Trimble of the Protestant Ulster Unionist Party. He died in a care home in his native Londonderry, also called Derry, in the early hours of Monday morning, his family said.😁CBC

MM , mendacious,cheat, grifter yacht puta ,, plagiarist, druggy, petulant, dubious ,provenance!!…………

Well MM ANON, do you feel better getting this off your chest? Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha! Should be a very very specific , probably bespoke birthday card,to include all of her characteristics that she possesses. Yes this is the top 10 isn’t it? One must celebrate something on her birthday, she is all those things and more and much much more! There’s a saying what goes around comes around. Karma. I do believe she has Markled herself, with this ‘book’. I also believe that she has marketed herself repeatedly in places all over the world at any price anything! anything! and everything!This word, puta, reminds me of a TV show called Everybody Loves Raymond. Well they went to Italy to visit relatives.and they came back. And there was a girl that one of the guys met there she came back too and she was working in the local Pizza parlour. She was beautiful and oh this guy was dating somebody at the time and his mother, if you ever watch that show, she was very controlling to put it mildly. And that the girls nickname was a pizza parlour Putana 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂which was a not very flattering and you can guess what that means. It means exactly what Madam is and you don’t have to imagine very hard! I like to think that everybody has some good in them. However the people the backers the people that I hang around with JE and GM, that sort of people, they are and have been serving a dark master. And they have ensnared themselves and allied with evil. Only God can save them. So we leave them to God!

“ never returning BP” ……………

There are currently renovations and refurbishing going on Buckingham Palace. Due to the ongoing nature of COVID-19, the reality is that her Majesty the Queen will not be returning there. She will continue likely doing zoom meetings and things from a distance, like Sir Tom’s Knighthood. The days of walkabouts, shaking hands, being amongst the public in the crowds, all those things that she has done for decades and loves so much, those days are gone. For her own safety and health. This must be so heartbreaking to her and my heart goes out to her.

Hackers🐻🐻🐻…………………Cozy Bear and Fancy Bear are both linked to Russian intelligence agencies. Cozy Bear accused Cozy Bear cyber spies of trying to steal coronavirus vaccine information from the U.S., Britain, and Canada. Russia denies the allegations. Security officials have accused Russian hackers of trying to steal information about coronavirus vaccine research in the U.S., Canada and the U.K.The U.S. Department for Homeland Security, the Cybersecurity Infrastructure Security Agency, the National Security Agency, Canada’s Communications Security Establishment and the U.K.’s National Cyber Security Centre joined forces Thursday in accusing Russia of the hacking campaign.“It is completely unacceptable that the Russian Intelligence Services are targeting those working to combat the coronavirus pandemic,” U.K. Foreign Secretary Dominic Raab said in a statement. “While others pursue their selfish interests with reckless behaviour, the U.K. and its allies are getting on with the hard work of finding a vaccine and protecting global health.” Raab also said that he was almost certain that Russians sought to interfere in the U.K.’s general election in 2019 but he didn’t point the figure at any specific group. Russia denied both of the allegations. Who are Cozy Bear and Fancy Bear?Cozy Bear and Fancy Bear are thought to be hacking groups within separate Russian intelligence agencies.APT29 - mean advanced persistent threat - or Cozy Bear is believed to be working for SVR, Russia’s foreign intelligence organisation.According to the NCSC, an arm of GCHQ, Cozy Bear “almost certainly operates as part of Russian intelligence services”. Fancy Bear, or APT28, is believed to be part of GRU, Russia’s military intelligence agency.standard.co.uk and CNBC.😁I have looked and looked and looked and looked and I can find nothing about a third bear or third bear hacking group. I have never heard about the hacking organizations fancy bear and cosy bear! Thank you, MM Anon! I have learned something major that I should’ve known absolutely! Might this be bear number three? Secret UK trade documents used by then Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn to attack the Government were stolen by Russian hackers from the email account of former international trade secretary Liam Fox, it was reported today.

The Department of International Trade documents on post-Brexit trade talks with the US were brandished by the hard Left MP at a press conference in November, days before he led his party to a catastrophic vote defeat at the hands of Boris Johnson. The Reuters news agency today cited sources who said they were taken from the email of Dr Fox, who had been removed from his post by Boris Johnson the previous July. They declined to name which Russian group or organisation they believed was responsible, but said the attack bore the hallmarks of a state-backed operation. This might be the third bear who has yet to be named.

Windsor home!!

Windsor Castle will be HMTQ’s new home base. I just think it’s marvellous HMTQ and Prince Philip, The Duke of Edinburgh,have had all this time together. They are both looking so well! I was so happy to see them at Beatrice’s wedding how beautiful HMTQ looked and how hale and hearty Himself looked. I think this is, I have said this before, but I think this is probably the most time they’ve had together in their entire marriage and it will continue to be right think it’s just absolutely marvellous! If there’s anything good come out of that just Covid-19,that is it!

GSTQAOBC 🇨🇦🇬🇧🇦🇺🇳🇿

——————-

80. Aug 5

MM ANON …… An ageing Puta , con grifter!! ……… The Royal families take the p*ss ( happy birthday)………… 50 dead , 2,700 injured ……………an Emu and a duck. …………… US open ( closing)………………McCartney/Lennon 😱…………… a rare sowing machine ………… K&W expect……… ………… another boundary??………… “ it’s a birthday Jim, but not as she knows it”🤣🤣🤣

Entertainment purposes

Aug 4/20

August 5/2020 Riddle was from yesterday sorry kids and I wasn’t here yesterday. I’m not feeling well and I just came on today to take a peek and l,did Miss a Riddle but I don’t think I missed a Balmoral. so I’m gonna get this want to go and see how see how it goes OK. Don’t mind my scratchy voice and stuffy nose OK Ha Hah Hah Hah Hah Hah Hah Hah oh man I sound like a smoker when I’m laughing right now home and I’m not a smoker but you know how that sound right?

August 5/2020. Riddle #80!!!

An ageing Puta , con grifter!! ……… The Royal families take the p*ss ( happy birthday)…………

Well Puta in Spanish and putana in Italian are same thing. A woman of the streets, a common street corner prostitute, a woman of very uncouth behavior! Those all fit Madam except she found other ways and places to apply her trade shall we say.. As with all of us she is ageing and she thought she would pull off the con of her life pulling one over on the royal family Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha stupid woman! She had no idea who she was dealing with and she still doesn’t she still is flagging that PR out there. And it’s worse is what’s worse is there’s people that are helping her those people are even more pathetic than she is! And there was all this will the royal family say happy birthday well they won’t will they will they won’t they won’t they will they will they will take. Well we all knew they would. We all knew they would they take the highroad as I said the other riddle her Majesty was on her way to Scotland and she took the high road. I hope you get the part of the song I’ll take the road and you get to take the low road and I’ll be in Scotland before you all know that song right? well her Majesty took the highroad and I love the photo that was posted on man it was 80% her majesty and 90 no no no 80 and 90 does not give 100% 20% Madam let’s say that way underneath oh, kids my brain is so stuffed up you’re gonna have to spare with me spare with me bear with me oh my all this is gonna be this is going to be the day oh my? as ever per decorum they extended lovely birthday greetings to Madame. Nothing more and certainly nothing less!

50 dead , 2,700 injured ……………

This is pretty bad. I mean horrific explosion in downtown Baghdad Baghdad all Lord help me to Beirut oh kids this is going to be off anyway Beirut not bag that there may have been a bombing in Baghdad I don’t know but this one is referring to Beirut! The stupidest thing was entirely preventable, this was entirely preventable!. Do you remember the bombing in Oklahoma City? I remember it like it was yesterday here’s a little little catch-up for those who may not know. The Oklahoma City bombing was a domestic terrorist truck bombingof the Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building[1] in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, United States, on April 19, 1995. Perpetrated by American terrorists Timothy McVeigh and Terry Nichols, the bombing happened at 9:02 am and killed at least 168 people, including many children. Anyhow they used fertilizer bombs in the amount of damage and carnage is just unbelievable. Know what you have here in Beirut was illegal storage in a warehouse. I am so angry about this I cannot even tell you it’s just so senseless! Here’s something from the DM. Lebanese port officials are put under house arrest over Russian businessman’s abandoned ammonium nitrate which blew up Beirut: String of warnings were made over chemicals impounded six years ago as astonishing images show it stored at the dock’s hangar 12.Lebanon’s cabinet has placed all officials responsible for Beirut port security since 2014 under house arrest. Comes after fire at a warehouse sparked a massive explosion that devastated the city, killing at least 135.Customs officers insisted authorities were repeatedly warned about the danger, but refused to take action.Explosive chemicals belonged to Russian businessman Igor Grechushkin before being impounded in port. Does it make you wonder why Russia is involved yet again? Yet again? Makes me wonder how many other warehouses there are like this all over the world where they are illegally storing ammonia nitrate and other things other lethal things! So so so unnecessary!

an Emu and a duck. ……………

Oh MM Anon, What is this is one of the obscure things that only English people know? Which is so much of your riddles.🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂Well I know one swims and is smaller and one is huge! and is featured in a current ad campaign for some company. It is funny how TV commercials you see the ad but, if you remember the ad, you have no idea what they were advertising. And there’s a bunch of commercials right now that are running with a guy in the yellow shirt and his partner is an emu and I have no idea maybe it’s an ostrich I’m not sure they’re both big birds anyway not THE big bird, THE big bird is from Sesame Street.😁😁🤣🤣🤣🤣😂 I am always the DM leaps in to the rescue.Orville and Emu are at centre of battle between Keith Harris and Rod Hull’s widows and toy-maker who ‘borrowed’ iconic puppets only to put them up for £10,000 sale at Bonhams.The birds had been put up for sale by merchandiser Roger Shaw with Bonhams.They were expected to make up to £20,000 for the pair at leading auctioneers.But it was scrapped after uproar from Harris’ widow Sarah and Hull’s widow Cher.The women are ‘determined to have the birds returned to their rightful owners’.I hate that when people try and make money off of cherished things like that. You see that so often with celebrity memorabilia or stuff like that like real actors I’m talking like Olivia de Haviland who recently passed away that kind of acted when their stuff get sold it’s just it just feels so wrong to me!

US open ( closing)………………

Ashleigh Barty pulls out of US Open amid concern over Covid-19.

World No 1 Ashleigh Barty has withdrawn from the US Open in a massive blow to the New York grand slam.

Not comfortable about travelling during the coronavirus pandemic, Barty is the biggest name yet to opt out of the major because of the global health crisis. My team and I have decided that we won’t be travelling to the US and Western and Southern Open and the US Open this year,” Barty said in a statement issued by her manager.Barty is still weighing up whether to resume her season in Europe and ultimately try to defend her French Open crown in Paris. o includes events for senior, junior, and wheelchair players. Since 1978, the tournament has been played on acrylic hard courts at the USTA Billie Jean King National Tennis Center in Flushing Meadows–Corona Park, Queens, New York City. Given the location of where were the U.S. Open is normally played right smack in the centre of Queens New York. Queens a borough of New York. With New York currently having us a lawn enforcement teams at every entrance and exit to the city, to the entire city! I cannot see how this could possibly continue there’s just no way. I know it’s gonna happen. Even if all the players came there’s no way it would happen!

McCartney/Lennon 😱……………

There has been a long time rumours of Paul McCartney and John Lennon having had a fling. And when I say fling I think you can infer what I’m saying. I know Paul McCartney had done an interview in 2018 with you GQ magazine I’ll put the link here. l don’t know if he’s declared that openly. I know many Beatles fans and party fans don’t want to know about this or to believe it or whatever but there’s so much stuff online about it you can research and I’m not gonna do that for you but I will do is put the link to the 2018 interview here. https://www.gq.com/story/the-untold-stories-of-paul-mccartney

a rare sowing machine …………

I have a old singer treadle sewing machine are you are meeting with MM Anon? My mum made a point of going to auction sales until she had one for each of us children. Mine still works like a charm just got to keep it greased up and it works perfectly!But seriously in the United States there’s an election for a new president in November. Who would’ve thought it with all the other news going on!? There has been a lot of talk in the last week or so about absentee ballots and voter mail in ballots. Some people don’t know the difference and some people do. I am not American so I will not attempt to explain that but suffice it to say there are two, aw heck I’ll explain it or try to. An absentee ballot is like if you’re not able to vote, you’re in the military outside the country or you’re in the hospital or your work has you in such a place where you cannot vote. A mail in ballot is something that you can request the form for and is simply if you just are not able to do or do not want to wait in the queue to vote, you can request a mail in ballot it will be sent you you can vote your things and then mail it back in. I’ve even seen interviewers and people talking about just just forgetting the whole, waiting in the queue for this election due to Covid, just rather just send open ballot voting like mail ballots to every household and then people can just mail back in the votes. Well the problem with that is there’s a lot of people who would be missed by that and there’s a lot of reasons why they would be missed and I’m not gonna go into right now that’s a whole bigger issue. However there are active workers sowing seeds of doubt in the validity of the coming election. It’s been happening for quite some time, actually been happening since President Trump was elected. The day after he was sworn in, they were already protesting and planning to get him out of office. They were already planning how to destabilize the government and sow doubt in his validity as president. And that has continued every single day of his presidency there has been a huge effort from the left, in the far left fascist left,and even further left than that Anarchy,to discredit him discredit his presidency and discredit everything that the Republican Party stands for. And that even includes many former Republicans which I I just I just can’t believe. You’re going to join with the left is fascist because you don’t agree with with some of the policy or you don’t like the person? Isn’t it party before person? Doesn’t the party set do the voting like I’m pretty sure I’m pretty sure like every senator or whatever member of Congress they each vote so yeah there is party before vote! OK enough of me here’s some research to kind of back up what I’m saying. article after article after article that I’m finding uses the word SOW. And most of those articles are from the left. I’m so hesitant to link any here because I don’t want to further their agenda. In fact I’m not going to link anything here because everything I found is from the left it’s even in the headline Trump sows blah blah blah…. you could find it, it is easy to find on Google. Easy easy easy to fine because Google is a left-wing owned company. Recommend it to me another search engine the other day and that’s amazing whatever found on there never appeared on Google so I they won’t mind, and I hope maybe you guys will know what I don’t know but it’s a website called DuckDuckGo and it’s a search engine and it’s amazing what you can all find in there. So keep your mind open kids and do your research. Dont just stick to watch one search engine especially with something that’s important. Because your election, and I’m speaking American friends now, your election is vitally important. I live in the country that is your biggest border and your closest neighbour well other than Mexico of course but you know what I mean. And what happens in your country greatly has affected will affect and will continue to check my country in the entire world.

K&W expect……… …………

MM Anon l am not falling for this again!🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂! My heart broken too many times. I think with Catherine and William are likely expecting is the return of their children either to school or homeschool routine, regular schedule or something like that. They also are expecting a change in what little public appearances they have been able to do I hate use the word appearance because that’s not the right word but it are use that for the sake of not thinking being able to think of another word right now but ha ha ha ha ha ha. DMCatherine and William have fun at Gavin & Stacey amusement arcade: Royal couple visit Barry Island attraction from BBC comedy as they try to provide boost to Britain’s Covid-hit tourism industry. They carried out two engagements in South Wales on Wednesday. Paid visit to iconic 'Nessa’s’ arcade in Barry Island and heard about impact of Covid-19 on tourism sector.Couple travelled to Shire Hall Care Home in Cardiff where they spoke to staff, residents and family members. The mother-of-three cut a stylish figure in a £1,635 designer dress by Emelia Wickstead and tan wedges. She sure loves her some wedges doesn’t she!?!😊😁😁😁🤣🤣🤣It comes just one day after royal donned a face mask for first time and visited a baby bank in Sheffield. I find it very interesting that the visit to the baby bank there those pictures appeared on the blog the other day and someone was questioning where those pictures were from. So either someone snuck out some pictures and then had them printed on the blog or the paper followed up on those pictures either way I think it’s interesting how Skippy yet again sets the pace set the information out there! They are trying to increase tourism but with all the new lockdowns, and more coming oh my goodness on lockdown now is Aberdeen! The Queen just drove through there yesterday! If it had been close yesterday they would’ve had to take a helicopter to Balmoral!

another boundary??…………

Lock down lockdown some more lockdowns in the greater Manchester area people are they have been on lockdown and some people that I’ve included included in that boundary are really quite upset because they not feel they have never been included in that jurisdiction that they are Cheshire just like the Cheshire cat! So it’s not a whole lot of people into lockdown that wouldn’t necessarily have been and I think a lot of people want to know why all of a sudden their postcards are being included in the greater Manchester postcards! Plus it’s also going to affect his face if your home is the greatest investment and that’s going to affect cash value of your home as well!!Aberdeen is on lockdown! New York City in New York City they are now having at every entrance and exit point I don’t know if every police or state police or watt that you it’ll be like going into another country you’ll have to declare yourself and they can turn you away or not and then you have to go into isolation! It is it is if anybody thinks Covid is going away it is not it is it is expanding at a rate that is frightening! All this quick to unlock down oh there’s my word again that I need to unlock down oh my will there ever be normal again sometimes I wonder if you know normal will be wearing facemasks that we live in bubbles like the it’s quite concerning. And talks of London going back in to lockdown. OK kids you should see this poor software trying to understand my stuffy nose oh my this is almost too funny!

“ it’s a birthday Jim, but not as she knows it”🤣🤣🤣

Again dearest M and M and M Eminem Eminem you’re a rapper no MM Anon. The favourite Star Trek reference that covers everything in life that has changed to such a drastic degree! Yes Madam had a birthday yesterday but it was likely a very unusual one like she’s never ever had. And next year’s birthday is likely to be equally as unusual. She was on her PR ! been saying she was going to throw a $200,000 birthday party for herself and usually when she mentions money in her PR, that means how much she wants how much money she wants from somebody for something.. I especially loved the birthday greeting that she wrote to her self pretending to be Harry, signing it love H! Oh that was just a kicker to me oh she’s a silly woman! I put it mildly!

GSTQAOBC 🇨🇦🇬🇧🇦🇺🇳🇿

—————-

[piperdelaprim]

Headcanon: If Piper made a coming out video (Piper x Tara)

[Yes lads, this is another Tiper piece, with a little bit of a different format. She won't mention her by name, but now you'll know who she's referring to.]

Also, to keep this shorter on the dash, I’ve added the “keep reading” cut after the intro! Sorry for not adding this before! Also this took me 2 months to finish it be like that sometimes tho

Piper: [mellow] Hi guys...

[After saying that shyly, she For about 10 seconds, Piper, while sitting down, stares at the camera and then shifts her focus to her laptop screen, examining how she looks with a rare casual outfit while contemplating on her next set of words.]

Piper: So I don't think anybody's ever gonna see this. I highly doubt in God's name that I'm ever gonna post this somewhere,

[Piper slightly chuckles at her own statement, but quickly shifts back to her serious tone]

Piper: ...but I have to say it. To somebody--er, somethin' rather.

[She chuckles once again]

Piper: As a lot of people know, I'm...well, not poor. I grew up very wealthy, and very fortunate.

Piper: [Her tone raises slightly] So damn fortunate that I got bored of it! [Yet another chuckle] Kiddin', kiddin', but I didn't feel like I had a life to live, uh, I didn't feel free, is a better way to say it. I kinda knew as a kid that I was missing a lil' somethin' in my life. Of course when I was a little child I didn't get this dang philosophical, but it was always there. And I know, I know. I pro'lly sound privileged as hell, but at the end of the day I'm grateful for everything I've endured thus far, but that's not the point here.

[Piper lets out a large sigh before continuing with her story]

Piper: My momma and poppa...though I love 'em to death, God bless their hearts, they wanted me to get married as soon as I can. I was...well...I ain't sure if this is how you say it but, conditioned to think that, that um...I was gonna get married...like a normal girl would! [Pause]

Piper: [Sarcastically] Well, I'm still not married!

[Piper pauses to drink the water cup beside her and then looks at the camera again for a couple moments before continuing]

Piper: And I really wasn't sure why I felt like nobody ever felt like they were...you know...the one! I mean, my life is already so dang crazy, I don't brawl for money or fame, but to, uh, release all the anger within me--to make up for all the times I couldn't resist what I was told to do. The funny thing is...I'm well over the adult age--and I still don't feel so free. I suppose I'm independent, but not exactly...free. If that makes sense.

[About to talk about the most serious part of her life, Piper lets out another big sigh]

Piper: I was set up with many different men by my family, and most of them were very kind and courteous toward me. They were all very good men, but fallin' in love with them was very hard for me to do--it ain't somethin' that came naturally. Well, I ain't been in love for a very very long time. Last time I was in love--it was many years ago--it didn't seem to work out, and lookin' back, it's hard for me to understand why things happened the way they did. Maybe it truly wasn't meant to be, I don't know, but the stars...didn't align. [quietly] They...uh...never did. But anyway, now it's a different time for the rest of the world; we're becomin' more open to each other and we're becomin' more accepting of things I couldn't have imagined being okay when I was growin' up. I'm talkin' about...being gay.

[Nervously, Piper laughs quietly to lighten the mood for herself]

Piper: Being gay, in my household and my family...was...unheard of. I'd like to say even forbidden. We're Christians and they said we can't be gay. I don't even know who the hell "they" is, but it was made sure of that I cannot be gay. It was even an insult I heard growin' up--and my, my, people thought it was a brutal word. Many of my classmates used to say it left n' right thinkin' that their dignities would be stripped for good! And frankly, because of the cruel world we live in, I thought bein' gay was weird, not normal, sinful even. 'Cause to everybody else it was, and I was predetermined to think the same.

[Piper suddenly starts smiling widely out of nowhere, and starts to chuckle, thinking fondly of the next thing she is about to say.]

Piper: Sorry! I get pretty damn giddy thinkin' about this part. I'm just...well I'll just tell you. So anyway, fast forward to present day. I brawled for the hell of it, just for fun. I thought I was straight but life didn't treat me very well.

[Piper suddenly remembers this aspect of her life and the mood shifts back to its original serious tone, but slightly more mellow.]

Piper: I got shit everyday. Sometimes just for breathin'. And it sucked for me. I didn't fit in because people were scared o' me. I was lonely, I was sad, I was...empty to the point where I thought disappearin' would be the answer. It wasn't great to be me at the time. There were such beautiful people havin' the time of their lives out in the battlefield--some o' them so madly in love with either each other or with life as a whole. And I was as jealous as a girl could be. I wanted that so darn badly that my anger built up too much to the point where I just shut everyone out. I also became too violent out in the battlefield and accidentally physically hurt too many people that didn't deserve a scratch. It began to all be too much.

[Piper then remembered the good part about her story, and she starts smiling brightly once again]

Piper: Anyway, this is what you’ve been waiting for, them little happy moments! It’s still a secret, sorta. But at least I can talk about it. So, um, I met this lovely lady in town one day, and I was feelin’ kinda hopeless so I went to talk to her about stuff, ‘cause I had no one. I thought I was a lil mad for just goin’ to some random stranger and ask ‘em about what I should do about my sad ol’ life. And to my surprise she read me like a book...with her cards! [laughs] It was crazy! She just clicked with me so fast, it was somethin’ I never felt before. You know, it made my heart race a lil. 

[She laughs again, except more nervously]

Piper: I’m actually a little nervous right now talkin' about her 'cause it's so scary but, obviously what we have was more than what meets the eye! [She laughs nervously again, but then continues to smile] I'm so nervous talkin' about this because it was against everythin' I knew. It didn't feel right at all, but my feelin's couldn't take it anymore. I was already so restricted in my normal life and everythin' prior to it, I couldn't let this opportunity to be happy go. Again, I thought I was a fool tellin' er how I felt. I mean, what if she wasn't...you know?! But like I said my own happiness was on the line. All the signs added up, for some odd reason I was confident enough that my chances were high. Ah, haha...my mom always taught me to shoot my shot...ahh she might be a lil' disappointed at me though! Well anyway, that new lovely lady with a mask told me she felt the same, and at that moment I never felt more free in my life. I was so scared to my stomach, I was scared of rejection, not only from her but from the rest of the world. Even though it felt so wrong to do, the feeling afterward felt so right.

[Piper takes a short breath and takes a sip of water.]

Piper: Well, I've been ramblin' and ramblin' but I will say this last thing. Love can fix a lot of things--not everythin', but a lot. I still got my issues, life ain't gonna be dandy forever just 'cause I found my lover, but consider this: do things because of love, doesn't gotta be that icky, cheesy type o' love that I was talkin' to you about, but it could be your family, your friends, whoever or whatever, alright! I realized I brawl 'cause I hated myself, not 'cause I loved the adrenaline or the glory. I also realized that I denied this part of me for so long cause I was scared, and I hated feelin' more outcasted than I usually had. I'm still tryin' my best to set myself free, but it's a process that became a little better for me to handle. Just don't do things outta hate or outta fear, it ain't good for you, it ain't good for nobody.

[Piper's cell phone rings, once she finishes her sentence, she picks it up]

Piper: [on the phone] Hey love! How much did you earn today? [She smiles as the person on the other end speaks] That's good. I would be more than happy help you if you wanted, it's what I should do for you, but you keep on sayin' no! [Inaudibly, the person on the other end speaks as she laughs happily]

Piper: [on the phone] I'll come by later for sure! I don't exactly need a readin' though, I'd just love to talk normally. Did you want to...

[Piper uses her cursor to stop the recording before she could finish her question to the person on the other side of the line.]

...

And scene. I hope you enjoyed it! This was a long time coming but I'm so happy I was able to finish it!

[leonbastralle]

Replies!

yet again i waited a while oops (also look at this wonderfully creative title would you) but here they are finally!! tumblr kept eating half of them and here i thought they finally had that fixed -.-

anyway thanks for your support my dudes!! it’s appreciated ♥♥

thatsimslove replied to your photoset

This is a gorgeous picture 😍

thank you!! this place is so perfect for a wedding ;_;

peachbobs replied to your photo “wow thanks”

scroll the top thingy all the way over and make sure safe mode is off !!

i did that! tumblr just does that sometimes when nobody’s tagged you in anything for too long XD

volcanopasta replied to your photoset

Return of the flower beard!

YESSSSSSSSSSS i could not let this opportunity go to waste!

monets-pixels replied to your photoset “Gen 6 is finally complete with Bay and Breeze!”

😍

worth the pregnancy and baby drama, huh? i love all these kids so much wait till you see them as children!

alfalfalegacy replied to your photoset “Gen 6 is finally complete with Bay and Breeze!”

Ahh cuties!!

Breeze might be favourite now haha

bay’s probably MY new fave xD but breeze is good! she has quite a lot of connie tho i think (re: that one comment that comes later bc replies don’t know chronological order abt wave looking like connie)

amixofpixels replied to your photoset “Gen 6 is finally complete with Bay and Breeze!”

Breeze may challenge Wave. *-*

Only kidding, Wave is life.

WAVE WILL FOREVER RULE OUR HEARTS!!!! crazy hat lady ♥

alfalfalegacy replied to your photoset

I see a lot of Connie in her here lol

this is literally the only pic i could find of puffy cheeked connie (good old times) and wave definitely has char’s eyes and nose, but she just generally looks like a miracle i guess XD

hellerie replied to your photoset “So…this is us.“ “It seems. Fuck. This is…“ “Good? Weird?” “That, and...”

k i did read it all and u did kill me thanks for that

nice way to spend a saturday night init

in a grave

our rented one? If u wanna hop it

is it bad that i feel accomplished? xD i made you FEEEEEEEEL but sure thing i too am always dead you know that let’s do some grave cuddling

monets-pixels replied to your photoset

👀

bet you expected more smut and what you got was stammering overwhelmed boys oops

volcanopasta replied to your photoset “It’s @twinsimskeletons‘ birthday today so I had to take a few pics of...”

this is so cute!!

ahsjgajshfgajsfhagsfjas thank you ;_; i hate eaxis so much for releasing c&d this late these 2 deserved a doggo all along!

socialbunnies replied to your post “i promise i haven’t forgotten abt you guys!! i’ve just been lurking...”

tbh I love the gameplay stuff soOoOoOooOoooO <3

aaaaaaaaaaaa rly ;_; i’ll have to frame that and put it somewhere to look at whenever i want to throw all my caps in the trash again xD thank you so much! i hope story bits are ok too ;)

alfalfalegacy replied to your photoset “C: Fair enough! How about you and mum? Are you guys good, too? S:...”

The flower beard will return

connielotte is getting married and everyone’s just thirsty for the flower beard i cannot believe

amixofpixels replied to your photoset “HUGS FOR EVERYONE”

I'll have to give a virtual one for now, but one day! ;)

soonish, maybe ;) ;)

monets-pixels replied to your photoset “T: Hey guys! Talkin shit about me?”

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

whatttt let the boy live

monets-pixels replied to your photoset “G: Oh wow! After Char had the triplets, I admit I didn’t think I’d...”

I LOVE THIS

SISTERSSSSSSS

yESSSSSSSSS sometimes i forget i cry and they used to be so close ;_; glade needs to please come over more again! i remember the last time was when she was pregnant with coriander...oh boy

monets-pixels replied to your photoset “This boy aged up beautifully!”

and my boy there he is

monets-pixels replied to your photoset “G: Well hello there my dearest nephew! Aren’t you a good child! T:...”

THERE SHE IS THAT'S MY GIRL

in which ebonyi adopts all annie’s sims (aka sims she received from others and sims she bred from two sims she received from others oops)

monets-pixels replied to your photoset “In case you were wondering where Tide is, he’s still alive and...”

Tide whom?

we don’t know a tide in this house we worship the hat lady

monets-pixels replied to your photoset “S: What do you mean, there’s no more soup???”

give! her! more! soup!

More Soup For Shore 2k18 is gonna be my new motto ok but seriously this is now a thing shore is a soup lover

pixeldemographics replied to your photoset “™¥”

its a good thing that char has taken the bottles out bc connie sure looks like shes thirsty

who says she wants the bottles tho

alfalfalegacy replied to your photoset “If it looks like Char’s always mixing, that’s…because she is. I’m...”

I love (1) woman

s a m e

twinsimskeletons replied to your post “4 glow flame and connie and 5 emusci james and kane >:)”

this made me laugh. thank you for making me laugh

no problem ;)

inkwisteria replied to your photoset “Look who Char’s working with ♥”

My girl! <3

berrysweetboutique replied to your photoset “Look who Char’s working with ♥”

♡

i know right!!! it’s so nice to see she’s still around tho her cap glitches terribly i need to see what i can do abt that i rly need them to have a work bromance

simxnoire replied to your photoset “This boy aged up beautifully!”

MY B A B Y

yesssssssssss he is grown!! there should be quite a few more pics of him in the queue too ;) and once gen 7 starts, well...you’ll need to see abt that he might stick around

hellerie replied to your photoset “This boy aged up beautifully!”

ok but im the painting of the alien thx 

a bEAUTIFUL ALIEN i think they took this one to the new house i’ll be sure to hang you in a nice spot XD

hellerie replied to your photoset

me whenever reylo slips through the cracks even tho i have the words rey and reylo blacklisted everywhere

me whenever ppl doNT TAG THEIR FUCKING T R I G G E R S

amixofpixels replied to your photoset “™¥”

I second that heart like nobody's business. @tainoodles​, you did so darn good.

i hope she read that xD mum!glade especially is something else

twinsimskeletons replied to your post “.”

v r00d v bad like oh my gosh the worst rudest person. (jk obv luv)

tumblr ate all the other comments to this post so i’m just gonna add them manually:

@penelope-and-wonders said: Never have been a bad person to me 😊 So no problems here 😊 

@amixofpixels said: Annie, you have never been rude or unwelcoming to me, and I don't think that will ever change. I know what it is like to overthink things and it sucks, but know that even though, I'm on hiatus, my messages are always open to you. And it's also I can give you all the love you deserve. <3 

@nernershuman said: You are the farthest thing from rude and unwelcoming. You're a sweetheart. 

@alfalfalegacy said: Never been rude to me. You've always been very sweet and welcoming 

thank you so much for taking your time to reply guys ♥ as chelsea said yes i very much love to overthink and it’s just like...better safe than sorry, you know? and now i don’t need to worry abt this for...another month or so xD i’m glad i’ve been doing alright! you guys are all amazing too tho!! giving me all the support i do not deserve i cry

twinsimskeletons replied to your photoset “S: What do you mean, there’s no more soup???”

food of the gods

:o

twinsimskeletons replied to your photoset “C: Oh, there you are, Jess! That’s…wow! That’s a pretty neat paintig!...”

It's Isaac Pigton discovering gravity obviously

i’m nominating this one for comment of the year thank you very much

twinsimskeletons replied to your photoset “when we returned home and she pulled me close for one last goodbye,...”

i mean did you write that? Because if so you should like... do more of that. That was very beautiful!

akjsfhaskfjhakjHADKJHASFKJAHSFSD tbh i’m still not over this AT ALL i’m crying YOU LOVE THIS AND I CAN’T i’ll try to do more!! let’s see if i’m inspired...i mean there IS the wedding night poem still tho that’s completely different AGAIN

pixeldemographics replied to your photoset “Just reading about the soloist and it says that here. Must be good,...”

I CRY PLS GIVE MY BOY TABASCO A NOBEL PRIZE HE DESERVES IT

he truly does for being a bomb friend to ficus wHERE IS GEN 8

pixeldemographics replied to your photoset “Tabasco? I’m heading out, are you done for the day? Do you need me to...”

ficus is doing a mighty poker face but i feel like his heart casually did a triple somersault in his chest

basically, a summary of poker face ficus with the extreme feelies

pixeldemographics replied to your photoset “Tabasco? I’m heading out, are you done for the day? Do you need me to...”

petition for more ficus with a tie!!!! also the expression ficus nooo its friday fuckt me up bc im like hell yea its friday its FIG FRIDAY

sdjkhfskdjhfskdjfhskfahkfsjasfasd i cRY fig fridays gonna b v boring this week i will fail u with old pics but also sure thing!! ill see what we can do abt tie ficus

pixeldemographics replied to your post “(its a mixed bag of charas i kno but shhhh) pavot, calla, & yarrow +...”

yes pls seduce yarrow

would if i could

pixeldemographics replied to your post “(its a mixed bag of charas i kno but shhhh) pavot, calla, & yarrow +...”

also was the theft of his heart a slow or quick heist i feel like we need to Discuss this

slow!! pavot rly isnt the person to do anything fast so it seems only fair. i mean there was definitely some initial attraction (and the whole wTF WHY IS THIS GODLY PERSON TALKING TO ME) but, in good annie fashion throwing my own traits on my chars as always, he discovered new smol details he found intriguing and/or adorable every time and at som point that made his heart do a lil jump but i dont think he knew how bad things were until That One Scene u kno the one bc i feel like thats too much of a spoiler to put into a reply post xD

pixeldemographics replied to your post “(its a mixed bag of charas i kno but shhhh) pavot, calla, & yarrow +...”

i die so much at pavot one day hes gonna realize all his dang shirts are missing and when he does theyll already b cut in half smh

basically hell notice when he sees a certain someone wearing them that good stupid boy i love him

(also this killed me too i cry i m a g i n e)

pixeldemographics replied to your post “(its a mixed bag of charas i kno but shhhh) pavot, calla, & yarrow +...”

tbh i too would b scared of stealing from calla

i bet even zazazazazazazazazazaz is

pixeldemographics replied to your post “tide, havelock, & coriander + 5!!”

i cry pls dont kill him for real

dw were good that would have no use in the story and you know i aint abt that

[tatooedlaura-blog]

Lost Keys

yes, yes, the throwback to end all throwbacks for me ...

my first fic written in 1997 in the midnight darkness of my bedroom in my parents house by the light of a 10" TV with pencil on a yellow legal pad at the tender age of 21 ...

All errors, in both grammar and punctuation, are original ... I chose to correct just one time notation from the Gossamer post way back when ...

&&&&&&&&&&

Lost Keys:

"Come on Scully, what else are you going to do on vacation? Read 'Breakfast at Tiffany's', vacuum that little dog of yours?”

"So instead of relaxing and yes, probably reading that book you refer to so affectionately -- you want me to go up to your mother's cabin in Quonochataug and help you clean?"

"Yup, that about covers it."

"We see enough of each other here, why would I want to spend my vacation with you as well?"

"Because I'd miss you horribly and you know that if you're not around Scully, I'll get myself into loads of trouble and you'll have to come bail me out."

"Sadly enough Mulder, I wouldn't put it past you. Now, why do you really want me to go?"

"'Cause if you wield a paint brush as well as you wield a gun," ruefully rubbing his shoulder and giving Scully a sly little grin, "the job will get done faster and I won't have to call you and complain, waking you up at the most hideous hours of the night. Think of it Scully, it'll be a nice trip to the forest

"Mulder, may I remind you of what happened the last time you promised me a 'nice trip to the forest'"

"Oh yeah. Sorry about that."

"Mulder ..."

"Yeah?"

"What time do we leave?"

"You really mean it."

"Why do you suddenly sound disappointed?"

"'Cause I spent half the day coming up with reasons to get you to go. I haven't even got to the good ones yet."

"Well, save them Mulder, you may need to use them to persuade me not to shoot you again once the mosquitoes start attacking and the poison ivy sets in."

"Ah Scully, they'll stop attacking once they find out that your not as sweet as people think you are."

After threatening to throw the stapler at him, Scully picked up her briefcase and started for the door.

"I'll be by to pick you up at seven a.m. tomorrow, and thanks again, you won't regret it."

"No, but you may. I tend to snore; quite loudly I might add, when I feel the need to take revenge."

With that said - she straightened Mulder's tie, gave him a quick grin and slid out the door-leaving Mulder with a straightened tie and his mouth hanging open - amazed that even after five years, his partner still knew how to take him by surprise.

Mulder picked her up a little after seven. He put her things in the car and they set out on the three hour drive to Quonochataug.

"Well Scully, we have arrived." Mulder announced much later in the day.

"And to think, it only took us five and a half hours to get here."

"How was I to know about the construction. At least we got the scenic route."

"It seems that we always end up on the scenic route. Cows and all."

"Really, dear Dr. Scully, after all we've seen together, you feel the need to complain about the cows."

"It's not the cows themselves but the noxious gases that emerge from them."

"I didn't smell anything unusual," Mulder replied, with his blue eyes twinkling.

"Fine Mulder, and I have just been made director of the FBI."

"Well director, how do you like the place?"

"I've seen it before, remember."

"Yeah, but this time it's light and you're not trying to keep me from destroying myself in the process."

After a slight pause , Scully turned to Mulder, "you know, this place really is quite nice. I think I can handle a few days here. Especially if it means I may find some incriminating evidence on you - such as the ever popular bear skin rug photograph."

"Well Scully, in order to find such horrendous stuff, I guess we're going to have to get to work. Here, catch."

Scully snatched the keys out of the air in a clean swoop and went to unlock the door as Mulder got out their bags.

Once Scully had gotten into the house however, she forgot all her misgivings about coming here for vacation-the house really was wonderful, incredibly dusty, but perfect. Scully could just imagine Mulder as a child, running through here with Samantha, playing games with her, telling her stories.

She was jolted out of her daydream by the sound of her partner's voice behind her.

"Are you gonna stand in the door all day or just until my arms decide to fall off?"

Scully gave a small grin and without turning around "you shouldn't have carried them all at once. Contrary to popular belief, you are not superman."

"But I could play him on TV" Mulder replied, then he grunted and dropped everything onto the front hall floor.

"So what do you think Scully?" he asked with a smile.

She turned, put a hand on his chest without thinking and said "it's even better than I could have imagined. The last time I was here, I was too frightened to get any kind of look around."

"For that Scully," he said in a sad tone "I apologize. I don't plan on doing that to you ever again - trust me. Now, how about a tour before lunch"

"Lunch - you were actually serious about cooking," Scully said, "I assumed you were just toying with me. I figured I'd be cooking all week."

"What" Mulder replied, looking both shocked and amused, "did you think I survive off of when I'm at home?"

In an equally amused tone, Scully replied, "sunflower seeds, ice tea and whatever you bum off of me"

"My dear, you are in for one big surprise."

After the tour of the house, which included two nice size bedrooms, a large living room, an even larger sun porch and a small but efficient kitchen; Mulder made a rather appetizing turkey sandwich with the food they had brought with them.

Looking over the top of her sandwich, "Mulder ..."

"Yeah," he replied through a large bite of the sandwich.

"Did you tell Skinner that I was coming up here with you?"

"Yeah, I said my mom recruited you to clean gutters and repaint the walls."

Laughing, Scully asked about Skinner's reaction

"Well," replied Mulder, "he told me to make sure you weren't abducted, eaten, held at gun point, threatened to be killed, chased by the Enigma or trapped by a giant tape worm. Then he told me to thank you for coming along because who knows how much trouble I could get into without you."

"Everybody seems to think that you'd fall apart without me."

Mulder got up and crouched next to her chair, "Well Scully, I'd have to say I agree with them. Without you there next to me, I'd have checked out of here a long time ago."

Scully briefly put her fingers on his cheek then playfully tweaked his ear, " I guess what they say is true - best friends do stick together through everything - and believe me, we've seen everything."

For the briefest of moments, something passed between them and they held each other's gaze; then Mulder's stomach let out an incredible growl and both started to laugh.

After finishing up their lunch and as they were cleaning up, Mulder's cell phone rang.

It turned out to be his mother, telling them both that she was sorry but she wouldn't be able to make it up there until later in the week.

"She said that one of her good friends is coming home after hip surgery and their is no one to take care of her until a couple of days from now."

Scully had been able to gather this information from Mulder's half of the conversation. She had tried not to listen, but sometimes it was just so hard to ignore that voice of his.

"Well, what do you propose we do now, Dr. Scully?"

"Well, Mr. Mulder, I propose that you wipe that mustard off your chin and then we take a look at what needs to be done."

"You mean you still want to stay."

"Sure, besides, " grabbing a handful of red hair on either side of her head, "I refuse to sit in that car again - with your voice on one side of me and Elvis' on the other - I think I'd go crazy long before the New Hampshire border."

By the time they had mapped out all that had to be done, night was fast approaching and both agents had begun to yawn after their long day.

"Well Mulder, where should we sleep?"

"Why Scully," Mulder said with that innocent look, "I didn't know you cared - I prefer the left side of the bed but it's always lady's choice with me."

"Mulder," Scully said good naturedly, "if I wasn't so tired, I'd throw something at you but as you can see, I can hardly keep my eyes open. I'd probably aim too low and hit something more important than your shoulder."

"Scully, don't tempt me with such a proposition."

"If you don't tell me which bedroom I'm sleeping in, I'm going to fall asleep right here and you'll have to carry me upstairs. Just remember that the human body weighs almost twice as much when asleep."

"Again Scully," replied Mulder, "don't tempt me with such a proposition like that. For tonight, we have to sleep downstairs because those sheets haven't been changed in about a year and their is way to much dust to sleep to tonight. We'll air them out in the mornings."

"So I'm guessing I get the couch and you get the floor, unless you want to sleep in the tub."

"Ahh Scully, you know me too well."

After they both had found blankets and got settled, Mulder suddenly jumped up and turned on the light at the end of the hall.

"Why'd you do that," Scully asked.

"Because I know that you hate sleeping in total darkness."

Scully just looked at him in amazement.

"Hey Scully," Mulder said with one raised eyebrow, "I do pay attention to things outside the X-Files."

Mulder lay down in his old sleeping bag on the floor and called a playful goodnight to the still dumfounded Scully on the couch next to him.

Mulder awoke with a start when something fell on him from above. He opened his eyes and smiled when he realized that his partner's hand had slid off the couch and landed on his chest. He was about to slide her hand back next to her when the moonlight from the window illuminated a faint scar between her thumb and forefinger. He reached up to touch it and discovered just how soft his best friend's hand really was. The only times he had ever held her hand was to help her up or when he took something she was offering. He had never been able to inspect those small hands like he wanted to. After tracing her fingers and the back of her hand, he turned it over and lightly caressed her palm. The callous on her finger from the trigger on her gun. How often she had to save him by drawing her weapon and destroying the enemy? He could hardly keep track anymore. Without realizing it, he had begun to move up her arm. Suddenly a familiar voice jolted him out of his contentment.

"What in the world are you doing Mulder? For a minute I thought you were a huge and hideous bug." Scully asked.

Mulder, stammering like a school boy (but not letting go of her hand), "Your hand fell on me and woke me up and I saw a scar and then I tried to put your hand back next to you and I realized ... did you know you have very soft hands ... I'm sorry."

He said everything in such a rush that Scully had to bite her lip to keep from laughing. Truth was, she had been woken up when her hand fell and she hadn't stopped him because she enjoyed his intimate touch more than she wanted to admit.

"It's all right Mulder, really."

In order to break up the awkward feeling that suddenly filled the air, Scully said, "well, since we're up anyway, how 'bout a snack. I'm starving."

Grateful for the distraction, Mulder replied "you really are an eating machine aren't you?"

"Does this mean you won't be joining me in some food?"

"God no ... point me towards the kitchen woman."

After making some sandwiches, both returned to the couch.

Looking at her hands, Scully remarked "I didn't even realize that scar was visible anymore."

"Where'd it come from. I didn't do it did I?" Mulder asked with a worried look on his face.

"Oh no. I got this when I was 14 and I snuck one of my mom's cigarettes. I was so scared I was going to be caught that I forgot it was lit and the ashes fell and burned my hand. After that I decided that me and cigarettes did not mix."

"Dr. Scully, you rebel. I guess that red hair of yours represents your wild side huh?"

"You think that was wild. My senior year in high school, I decided to get into the school spirit and dye my hair for the homecoming game. Mind you, the school colors were purple and yellow."

Mulder smirked, "this doesn't have the makings of anything good."

"You could say that again. Everything was fine until I tried to wash it out. When I emerged from the shower, my hair was a hideous shade of puke green with pumpkin orange streaks."

"Oh please, Scully, tell me your mother took a picture, please."

"No such luck darlin'. Anyway, my dress was a wine red color so in the end I looked like something from Dr. Seuss. My date tried to make me feel more attractive by thinking he could get more that one kiss. To make a long story short, he wound up with a heel scar on his shin and a bloody nose and I got to sit on the bleachers the rest of the evening."

"Now I know why you skipped your reunion. I am sorry. You must have felt awful."

"Well Mulder, worse things have happened since then but that still ranks up there with the best of them. By the way, if you don't wipe that smirk off your face Mulder, I may be forced to disown you."

"Sorry Scully, I was just picturing you decking that guy. I'd have cheered for you" Suddenly turning serious, "I would have danced with you Scully. I would have been happy to be their with you because, green hair and all, you still would have been beautiful."

Luckily, it was dark enough that she couldn't quite see the crimson creeping up Mulder's cheeks and he couldn't quite see the surprised but happy twinkle in her blue eyes.

Scully looked at Mulder and suddenly asked "are you sure you're not Eddie Van Blunht in a Mulder disguise again?"

Both laughed at this comment and Mulder said mischievously "no, but am I coming close?"

With that, Mulder pushed Scully back down on the couch, then flopped onto the floor.

A few moments later, Scully slipped her hand over the side of the couch, gently laid it back on Mulder's chest and fell sound asleep - as did Mulder with his hand on hers.

Scully woke up slowly. It took her a second to realize where she was (in their line of work, both rarely stayed in one place for very long). When she did, she decided to wake up Mulder with a pillow to the head. Scully slung her pillow full force over the side of the couch and was surprised when all she hit was floor. Mulder was already up but it was too quiet for him to actually be in the house. Scully got up and shuffled her way to the kitchen. It was there that she found a note from Mulder saying that he went to the store for food because he was tired of turkey and ham. Scully grabbed herself a banana, a piece of bread and a glass of water and headed onto the porch to eat her breakfast in the sun. She also took "From Outer Space" with her because she knew that Mulder would never be quiet enough for her to read in peace.

About a half hour later, Mulder got back to the house. He took the groceries in and set them on the counter. He noticed the back door was open so he walked around to tell Scully he was back. He peered around the door and found her engrossed in a novel. The way the sun was reflecting of her hair and that look of total contentment on her face made him stand quietly and forget everything but her.

She looked up suddenly and was shocked to see Mulder standing in the doorway, looking at her. He jumped, she jumped, he smiled and she just couldn't seem to keep a silly grin off her face.

"Good morning Scully. I trust you slept well considering when I got up this morning I could have rolled a bulldozer over you and you wouldn't have moved."

"I don't recall having slept that good in a long time."

"Ah Scully, I was sleeping next to you, how could you NOT be content."

"Yes Mulder that has to be it. Now, what kind of food did you get us?"

"Don't tell me your hungry again. At this rate, you might actually get fat in about four years."

"Mulder, when I'm not worrying about the x-files, my job, the world in general or you, I actually have an appetite and I love to eat."

"Well then, I guess I'm gonna have to stop doing things to worry you."

"Mulder, if I didn't have you to worry about, my life would cease to have any purpose at all. Besides, I kind of like worrying about you."

"Well, I'll just have to keep up the good work after all. I brought us normal food. Lettuce, tomatoes, and green peppers for some salad. Frozen pizza, more sunflower seeds, ice tea and some Ho-Ho's which, if you're nice to me, I'll let you share. I also got some meat for the carnivorous side of us."

"Again Mulder, you have discovered a way to shock me. Up until now, I still didn't think you had any idea of what a supermarket was or what types of food they had in them."

Digging back into the bags. Scully emerged holding a bottle of wine with an accusative look on her face and one eyebrow raised. "What are you planning on doing with this, Mr. Mulder. Seduce me over ho-ho's and sunflower seeds?"

Turning slightly red, "I figured it would taste good and I know that you like red wine. It is a vacation after all."

"Well thank you. And you made a pretty good choice too."

Brightening, Mulder replied, "I figured. You have the same kind in your refrigerator at home." Without missing a beat, he asked Scully, "did you know that you're still wearing you pajamas?"

"Well, I figure you've seen me in less and never yelled so I decided to get in as much reading as I could 'cause once you got back here, you weren't going to give me a minutes peace."

"Yup, you're right."

While Scully was changing, Mulder put the rest of the food away

"Where do you think we should start."

He heard Scully's voice before he saw her. She came into the kitchen putting her hair in a ponytail. He had to laugh. She had on a ratty old pair of jean shorts and an FBI academy shirt. Her socks were a faded out green and she had on tennis shoes, actual honest to goodness shoes, no dress clothes for his partner this vacation.

"I wouldn't laugh. Have you looked in a mirror today, oh partner of mine?"

"Yes and as usual, I liked what I saw. You're wearing real clothes Scully. I didn't think they even existed in your world."

"Well, a person has to dig far back in the closet but they're there, just waiting to be destroyed while helping you," Scully admitted.

"If only you had your green hair. Now that would be a picture."

Suddenly she took off after him and he almost fell trying to get out the door. She chased him through the trees. Mulder stopped dead in his tracks in front of her, causing her to crash into the back of him. She peered over his shoulder and saw why he had stopped. They had come across a little clearing and in one of the bigger trees, a tree house sat with a ladder leading up to it.

"Is it yours," Scully asked in a hushed voice, not wanting to break the spell of the place.

"Mine and Samantha's," Mulder said, just as softly.

Scully had this sudden urge and without stopping herself, she reached for his hand and held it tightly. He was surprised by the touch but as she held his hand, a warmth began to spread up his arm and he was reluctant to let go, so he didn't.

"We used to bring our bologna sandwiches up here and eat. We would race to the ladder and whoever lost had to clean up the mess before we went in for the night. We'd play Stratego and card games. She never quite got the hang of poker though."

"You taught an seven year old poker?" Scully asked with her eyes wide.

"Sure. Want to learn?" Mulder asked amusingly. "Didn't you brothers ever show you?"

"Actually, I taught them how to play although I haven't picked up a deck in a while."

"Well now. A challenge. I believe we have found our entertainment for the evening."

Mulder turned her around and led her back through the trees, never letting go of her hand.

Feeling his strong grip, Scully couldn't help but think of another evening entertainment but she decided she wouldn't mention it . With an embarrassed grin, she decided that holding his hand was good enough for the moment.

They emerged from the woods and stood looking at the house.

"Where should we start Scully? We can work from the inside out or from the outside in. Which would you prefer?"

"Well, we should probably clean out the bedrooms so we have some place to sleep tonight, then start outside because the weather is gorgeous right now."

"Hey, what was wrong with where we slept last night?"

Jokingly she replied, "aside from the fact that you still have carpet marks on your face, nothing."

"I know. You just couldn't stand to be sleeping that close to me for fear of what you might do to me in the dark of night. Heart pounding, mind racing because I was only mere inches away from you. I understand perfectly."

He somehow managed to say all this with a straight face but as soon as he glanced at Scully, he burst out laughing at the comical expression on her face. He assumed it was there because of his comments, Scully knew better however. He had come so close to the truth without realizing it that she had to laugh herself. Both didn't say another word as they walked into the house and back upstairs to the bedrooms.

When they had finished upstairs (or at least enough to be able to sleep there later on), Mulder and Scully headed outside and began to work there. Mulder cleaned the gutters and the chimney while Scully went to work on the yard surrounding the house. They worked in companionable silence. It was a nice, comfortable quiet. Something they never got to share when they were at the office or on a case. The day passed swiftly and by seven o'clock, Scully's stomach was growling a protest to not being fed and Mulder finally threw down his tools and dropped onto the lawn next to them.

Scully sat down next to him, "well sir, I would say that we've done a good days work. How 'bout we put some of this stuff away, then go throw the pizza in the oven."

Mulder answered her with closed eyes, "or we could just stay here until tomorrow morning."

"No such luck, my good man. I need a shower badly and from the smell, so do you. Come on, if this all works out right, we'll be eating in an hour and I know how much you love your pizza."

She got to her feet and held out he hand to Mulder. She hauled him up and together, they cleaned up after a long days work.

After putting the pizza in the oven, "Hey Mulder, you want the shower first," Scully called from across the room.

"No, go on. I'm way to comfortable even to think about moving, let alone actually doing it." Comfortable he was, sprawled on the couch with his feet dangling over the arm. He was also enjoying the thought of his friend in the shower. He quickly dismissed that thought however, because if he continued, he might go crazy. He decided a quick nap was in order, if only to distract him from the thought of Scully.

About 20 minutes later, Scully came back down into the kitchen; glad to have gotten rid of all the grime on her body. She walked into the living room to tell Mulder the shower was free and found him still sprawled out on the couch with a mysterious smile on his face. As she approached, Scully realized that Mulder was asleep. He looked more content than she had ever seen him and she didn't have the heart to wake him. Instead she went to the kitchen and quietly made a salad, dug up some paper plates and forks to set the table. The timer went off for the pizza and as it was sitting, Scully went to wake up Mulder. She leaned over Mulder's head gently began to tap the end of his nose. After a moment, Mulder opened his eyes and was met with the image of an upside down Scully sticking her tongue out at him.

"I don't know whether to kiss you or to scream," Mulder replied, grabbing the sides of her head.

"I'd be careful which you choose Mulder. Remember, I control the pizza and either choice could have dire consequences."

Scully wriggled out of his grasp and whacked his head with a pillow before going back to the kitchen. Mulder followed close behind, knowing full well which choice he would have picked.

Both the salad and the pizza were eaten rather quickly and sloppily. As Scully took her last bite, Mulder glanced up and started to laugh when he saw pizza sauce all over her nose and mouth. With a sickening realization, he saw that it was blood and not sauce.

At first Scully couldn't figure out why Mulder had turned pale all of a sudden. She wiped her face with her napkin; then she saw what was frightening Mulder. It was blood from her nose that she had felt.

Quickly she put the napkin to her nose and went to the bathroom upstairs. The bleeding stopped after a minute and Scully was about to go downstairs when she caught Mulder's reflection in the mirror behind her. She turned to look at him and saw the fear in his eyes.

"Mulder, the doctor said this might happen if I did a lot of strenuous work. I was bent over half the day and I guess the pressure built up."

"I thought the surgery made you better?" Mulder asked in a voice that nearly broke Scully's heart.

Moving towards him and putting a hand on his arm, "it did Mulder, it did. If you hadn't found a doctor willing to try; I would not be here today. The surgery was experimental and they weren't sure of the side effects, but remember the most important thing --- they got to the cancer before it spread too much. A slight nose bleed now and then is nothing compared to before." Looking up at him with a gentle smile, "you helped to give my life back Mulder. I'm not gonna let that gift go to waste."

"Scully, I want you to know that I'd do it all again."

"I know Mulder. Now, how about we forget this and go clean up the kitchen 'cause I'll be damned it I'm going to clean it up tomorrow."

Around 9:30 pm, Scully let out a yawn that nearly split her head in two.

"You can't be tired yet Scully, you haven't been fed in almost an hour and a half. We should be eating again. Maybe my watch is wrong."

"Cute Mulder."

"Yes, I try. Why don't you go to bed. I'll lock up down here."

"Why so generous? Is the boogie man hiding upstairs?"

"Possibly, at least he was when Sam was little. I've still got to take a shower anyway." =0D "Who am I to look a generous deed in the mouth. See you in the morning Mulder."

He watched her walk up the stairs. She must have felt him looking at her because she turned and asked, "you sure you're all right?"

"Fine, now go to bed because I don't have the energy to carry your sleeping body up the stairs tonight."

With that, Scully called good night again and made her way upstairs. She knew something was bothering her partner but she decided not to push it.

Mulder, meanwhile, locked everything up and headed for the shower. After standing under the near scalding water for about ten minutes, he dried himself and crawled into bed.

He awoke about 12:30 am and couldn't get back to sleep. He had been dreaming of Scully, Cancerman and his sister. The perfect makings for a nightmare, he thought bitterly. If only Cancerman had kept away, it would have been a far nicer dream. Tossing and turning for about twenty minutes; Mulder finally got up, put his FBI academy shirt on and made his way out to the hammock he and Scully had found and hung that morning. He tried to be quiet but he knew his partner would hear him and make her way down to him eventually, which was what he needed her to do.

Scully, in the meantime, heard Mulder go outside and when she peered out the window, she saw him sitting in the hammock. She waited a few minutes to give him time to collect his thoughts; then she grabbed the blanket, knowing he wouldn't have taken one himself and went outside.

Mulder heard the kitchen door shut and a few seconds later a familiar voice say, "is this net taken?"

He looked up and shook his head no. She sat down next to him and both were silent for a time.

"How did you know to come out here Scully? How do you always know when I need you?"

"Well, you always make just enough noise to wake me -intentionally or unintentionally. Also, we seem to know each other better than everyone else. I just feel it and come find you, where ever you are."

"Well Scully, I really do need you now," Mulder said quietly.

"Why ..." Scully asked, putting her hand just next to his.

"Scully, when I saw you today, with the blood and all, I've never felt more scared. I thought it was all starting again. I couldn't bear to watch that happen to you again. It would kill me to know you were in pain, to have you hurting and knowing that I could only stand by and watch." He grabbed her hand and held it as though his life depended on it. "Today, when I saw you like that, my whole world crumbled for a moment. That three minutes while you were upstairs were pure hell. I don't want to come so close to losing you again, ever." His voice cracking as he said these last words.

Mulder dared to glance over at Scully and was surprised to see tears in his eyes. He reached out to wipe away the ones that had fallen and this simple gesture undid her composure completely. She leaned on Mulder's chest and cried without restraint. Mulder felt his own tears falling, so he held her tightly and waited till she had finished.

She looked up at him with a tear stained face and gave him one of her 'Mulder, you're absolutely wonderful' kind of smiles. He smiled back, then shivered when he realized he was cold. Scully felt this and covered them both with the blanket. She had him lay down, and slipping down beside him with her head on his chest, she tucked the blanket around them. Mulder wrapped his arm around her and put his head back.

"You know Scully, I spend so much time looking for things from the stars that I never stop to look at the stars anymore."

"Stars are some of the few things left that are truly beautiful. No matter how much a person knows about them, they still have a mysterious quality that keeps them beautiful; even to the most pragmatic study."

"They're not the only things in my world that are truly beautiful," Mulder whispered into the top of Scully's head.

"Mulder ..."

"Yeah"

"I'll never leave you again, I promise."

"And I'll never let you go."

These last phrases were said so softly that they could hardly be heard with the ears but they were heard clearly within the hearts.

Around 4:00 am, Mulder awoke first. He glanced down and saw his partner's head on his chest with her red hair splayed across his arm. He was gripping Scully tightly too him and her arm was tucked around him. He decided that he could get used to waking up like this. He chuckled silently at the thought of Skinner finding them in such a position. Mulder decided that he had better savor the feeling of complete comfort and safety while he had his chance. He planted a light kiss on the top of Scully's head and then fell back asleep.

Scully felt Mulder's kiss and decided not to fight the warm feeling that spread through her. She left her head on Mulder's chest and listening to the gentle rhythm of his heartbeat, she relaxed in the safety of his arms and returned to sleep as well.

Mulder woke up slowly about 7:30 am. He felt Scully to stir as well.

"Scully," he said softly, "are you awake?"

"Not if I have anything to say about it," was the muffled reply. "I hadn't planned on moving quite yet."

"I hate to tell you this doctor, but my bladder is about to explode and I didn't want to dump you on the lawn without warning."

Scully laughed and moved over. He almost ran into the house and Scully followed behind with the blanket.

A minute later, Mulder come back downstairs to find Scully curled up on the couch, still half asleep. He flopped down next to her and, putting his head on her shoulder, started to snore obnoxiously loud. She gave him a half smile and playfully plugged his nose.

"So, what are you making me for breakfast Mulder?"

"Well, what would you and your bottomless stomach like?"

"Something that will hold me until at least 11 o'clock."

"There's not food enough in this house to do that, so will you settle for some fruit, toast, tea and possibly some cereal?"

Heaving a huge sigh and looking at him with sparkling blue eyes, "I guess I'll survive."

Pinching her nose in return, Mulder asked "can I redeem myself if I bring the food to you so you won't have to move an inch?"

"I believe you can, although then I'd have to lose all respect for you and refer to you as house boy for the rest of the day."

"I can live with that."

He came back to the couch with the food on a tray and some flowers stuck in a glass, he also had on an apron and a towel over his arm.

"For you, madam Scully," Mulder said in his most atrocious French accent.

Scully couldn't stand it any longer. She let out a laugh so loud Mulder almost dropped the tray. He set it down in front of her and turned to leave the room.

"Aren't you going to stay and eat," Scully asked, finally able to control her laughter.

"Fraternizing with the staff, madam Scully. Isn't that against the rules?"

"Since when have we ever played by the rules, huh?"

"Good point." Mulder sat down next to her and they proceeded to polish off breakfast.

Neither spoke of what had happened between them the before but both felt closer to the other than ever. Nothing needed to be said, really.

After putting the dishes in the kitchen and getting dressed, Scully found Mulder sitting on the porch steps. She sat next to him. "What's to be done today, house boy?"

Smirking at her, "well, we should work inside today because we really shouldn't add anymore sun to the burns we got yesterday. Especially you. You burn easier and faster than my mother's pork chops and those go up in flames like that (snapping his fingers)."

"Better watch it or that name will remain permanently, including while at the office. Besides, you're right. Point me in the direction of a scrub brush. I'm ready to work an appetite."

Getting up, Mulder looked at Scully, "why am I not surprised."

Somehow, they managed to work through lunch and around five, Scully's stomach told her about the mistake. She had just finished scrubbing the bathroom floor, so she wandered around the house calling Mulder's name. She found him buried in the hall closet, washing walls. He finished his wall, backed out of the closet and found Scully behind him.

"Nice view," she said with amusement.

"Glad I could be of service." He walked around behind her, "not so bad yourself," nodding his head in approvement. He swatted her with a towel and scooted out the door before she could react.

Scully went to the kitchen and saw Mulder pulling the steaks out of the fridge, along with a can of peas from the cupboard.

"Give me 45 minutes Scully and you'll have a hell of a meal to quiet that stomach of yours."

Scully went back to clean up her stuff, then she picked up Mulder's mess in the hall as well. It was the least she could do considering she hadn't eaten this good in a long time. She also had time to take a quick shower.

She returned about half an hour later to find the table set, the food cooking and the bottle of wine on the table. Also, Mulder's box of Ho-Ho's was sitting on the counter, waiting for desert. Mulder breezed past her, saying he was going to take a shower and threatening her if she touched anything. She sat on the counter and ten minutes later he returned. He put the food on the table and retrieved the steaks from the broiler. Scully was about to open the wine but Mulder took the bottle from her hands,

"Not tonight, I'm the house boy, remember?"

He poured them both a glass and sat down across from Scully.

"Everything looks fabulous Mulder. Remind me never to doubt your cooking abilities again."

They began eating and halfway through, Mulder filled both glasses again, at Scully's request. This shocked him; usually they only had one glass apiece. By the time dinner was eaten, they had finished the bottle. They washed the dished and Scully picked up the box of Ho-Ho's, taking them out onto the porch. Mulder hesitated a moment, then retrieved the second bottle which he had placed in the refrigerator that morning. He carried it and the two glasses out to the porch as well.

"I hope you don't mind but I brought a second bottle," Mulder said sheepishly.

"I figured you were hiding one somewhere but I couldn't find it," she replied with a raised eyebrow and a smile.

"I hid it behind the refrigerator. I was hoping you wouldn't find it because I knew you'd yell at me."

"No. It tastes to good to be mad at you," Scully said, pouring herself a glass.

He opened the box of Ho-Ho's and they proceeded to finish both them and the bottle.

Scully got up a while later and walked over to the railing. "There's a storm coming," she said, looking at the lightning flashing in the distance, although it was to far away to hear the thunder.

Mulder came up behind her and put his hands on her back. Unconsciously, he began to rub her neck and shoulders. He could feel the knots in her muscles from scrubbing all day, so he continued.

Scully felt her body relax from the wine but more from Mulder kneading her shoulders and back. She let her head fall forward and let out a sigh of contentment. After a few minutes, Scully turned and started to work on Mulder's neck. Both began to yawn from the wine and from the gentle caresses. Without a word, both went inside, turned out the lights and went up to their rooms - calling a soft goodnight before closing their doors.

A crash of thunder woke Scully and for a moment, she had no idea where she was. She remembered a second later and realized she had broken out in a cold sweat. Ever since the stormy night Duane Barry had taken her, Scully had been terrified of thunderstorms; although she would never admit it to anyone but her dog. She told herself to stop being ridiculous but in the middle of the night while still under the effects of the alcohol, her mind began to race. First a branch hit the window, then she saw a shadow in the corner of her room. The next thing she knew, Scully was standing next to Mulder's bed.

"Scully, what's wrong? Are you all right?" his voice and eyes full of concern.

"Please don't laugh but ever since Duane Barry, I've hated storms and the dog's not here to talk to and there's a branch hitting the window and I keep seeing shadows." She said all this in a rush, blushing furiously but visibly shaken.

Without a work, Mulder lifted the covers and motioned for her to get in. She did so gratefully and at that moment, the storm arrived full force. Scully buried her head in Mulder's chest and curled into a ball. Mulder just held on, stroking her hair and telling her that he wouldn't let anything hurt her again. A couple of minutes later, the storm slowed for the moment and he whispered in Scully's ear, "at least we won't have to wash to windows outside tomorrow."

Scully relaxed a little at this. She lifted her head and found herself looking directly into Mulder's eyes. She held the gaze for a moment, then leaned forward and gave Mulder a kiss on the chin. She put her head beck down and molded herself against him as the storm picked up intensity again. Scully felt Mulder drop a kiss on her head, then on the tip of her nose. He wrapped his arms around her tightly and as they both relaxed in each other's arms; they slept.

Around 5:30, Scully woke up because she felt something laying on her. She opened her eyes slowly and discovered Mulder sound asleep with his head on her stomach. Scully realized that she had taken his pillow and she figured that sometime during the night, he must have worked his way down and was now using her belly as a substitute. His left arm was also thrown across her left leg. If he didn't look so comfortable, she thought, I'd wake him up and give him back his pillow. Then, as she looked down at his face, Scully realized that since they had gotten to the house, neither had spoken of their work, which usually took precedence over regular talk. She had never realized just how much the two of them had in common. She reached up and brushed a piece of hair out of Mulder's eyes and he stirred. She stopped quickly and waited, hoping he wouldn't wake up. Scully was enjoying this rare opportunity to really look at him without feeling guilty about it. He moved his right hand to her arm then continued his sleep, undisturbed. Scully let out a silent sigh of relief and continued to stare at him, memorizing the familiar outline of his face. She put her hand on the scar on his forehead, then gently ran her fingers over his hair. She examined his lips, then traced his chin up to his right ear. Suddenly, Mulder opened his eyes and to her surprise, Scully didn't remove her hand but left it on his cheek.

Mulder looked at her in confusion. "Why am I laying on your stomach?"

"Because I think I stole your pillow," she answered, still not moving her hand.

"Oh," Mulder lifted his head, brought his left hand up and rested his chin on it. "I guess I decided that you were the next best thing."

Scully's hand had slid off his cheek but her fingers were still on his chin. "I don't know if I should feel insulted or honored."

"Honored, I'm very particular about where I put my head."

"I can deal with that. I didn't mean to wake you. It's just that I thought of something. Did you know that we haven't gotten on each others nerves in almost four days. Are we going for the world's record?"

"Either that or there is something in the water." He reached up and touched the cross that hung on Scully's neck and was laying on her chest. He held it between two fingers, not looking at her as he spoke, "In the past four days, I've gotten closer to you than in five years. Maybe its the house, maybe its not having to worry about a case, maybe its because up here, we've both let our defenses down more than usual. We've been allowed to see each other as we really are, with no job between us. I almost don't want to go back to the real world. We'll return to being our uptight selves, holed up in the basement, working endlessly."

Putting her hand back on his head, "you know, we don't have to go back to being those people although I kind of enjoy arguing with you."

"Of course you do, you win more than me." Mulder finally looked up at Scully. "I enjoy us this way. It's going to be kind of tough to go back to that couch of mine. Here, I feel more safe than I have in a long time. I haven't had one nightmare since we came. There's no Skinner breathing down our neck, no extraordinary creatures lurking behind doorways, my phone hasn't rung since we got here - do you have any idea the luxury that is? I want to go back to the job, don't get me wrong, I love our work but for the last four days, I've had a life. I don't think I've ever had one before. I'm going to miss this, miss us here, being real friends without the threat of being killed hanging over us." Mulder let go of the cross but kept his hand where it was.

"Mulder, everything has changed, can't you see that. We haven't given up one thing and we don't have to give up the other. In my opinion, life is going to improve greatly because we've had this time together. Life will go back to its chaotic self but we've changed, you and I. Change can be a good thing, believe me. Trust me on this one, we'll return to that chaotic world but I for one will not forget this place. I could get used to taking vacations after all. To think, I wasn't going to come up here at first."

Mulder smiled, "now that would have been tragic to say least. I wouldn't trade this vacation for anything. The doctor really can make everything better, can't she." Mulder laid his head back on Scully's stomach and closed his eyes as she began to stroke his cheek with her left hand.

Without opening his eyes or looking up, Mulder said in a sleepy voice, "Scully, I think I'd like to keep you."

He couldn't see the surprised happiness in her eyes but he felt her body relax under him and he knew that she was smiling. That was enough for him, at least for now. He fell back to sleep with his head cradled by his best friend's body.

Mulder awoke to the smell of ham and eggs. He got up and followed his nose into the kitchen. There he found Scully standing in front of the stove. He walked up behind her and put his chin on her shoulder,

"Whatcha ya doin'," he asked, looking into the frying pan.

"I've decided that I owe you at least one meal considering that you've fed the bottomless pit," rubbing her stomach, "for the last four days. My cooking hasn't killed you yet so stop making those hideous faces."

Straightening his face out, Mulder said innocently, "me, mock your cooking. Who's been feeding me forever? Whenever I come to your door, you give me food. I'm just making faces because if I give in too quickly, you'll think me a pushover."

"Mulder, if you are one thing in this world, it is not a pushover, by any means."

"Thanks." He sat down at the table and picked up a fork. "Now feed me or I may have to get hostile."

"We wouldn't want that now would we." Scully filled up his plate, then hers. She sat across from him and both began to eat in relative silence. A few minutes later, Scully put down her fork and tapped Mulder on the hand to get his attention.

When he looked up, Scully said in a quiet voice, "thank you for last night."

Mulder looked at her in surprise, "for what?"

"For keeping me company and for not making me feel like a complete idiot because I was scared of something totally irrational."

"Irrationality is in the mind of the beholder Scully, and I for one, refuse to believe that you would let an unwarranted fear control your life. If you say that you're frightened by something, I will believe you. I'd never laugh at you and you know it. I am more than happy to do anything that will make you feel better. Just remember that, all right. Besides, I have never been one to disbelieve. You ought to know that by now."

Suddenly Scully got up and gave Mulder a big hug. She said into his ear, "you know what?"

"What?" he whispered back.

"I think I'd like to keep you too."

She let go of him and proceeded to dump her dished in the sink. Mulder just stood their with a silly grin on his face, staring at the fiery red head at the counter. His fiery red head, he thought to himself. He walked out of the kitchen whistling the theme to Star Trek. Scully heard this and grinned, knowing he only did that when he was in a really good mood.

By the time they actually got outside, it was after ten and the heat of the day was already bearing down. Both went to work cleaning out the shed. By five o'clock, they had accumulated a mountain of trash. When they were finished carrying it out to the curb, both were covered with sweat and dirt.

Scully looked at Mulder and burst out laughing.

"What's so funny?"

"You."

"Well, you're quite amusing yourself, you know."

"It's just that I don't think I have ever seen you this dirty before. If the other agents could see us now, they'd probably keel over. The two cellar dwellers actually went out in the fresh air and did manual labor. They probably wrote us off long ago."

"Well, I guess we just won't invite them up here, now will we. Our reputation can not be tarnished by revealing that we're real people."

"Good idea." Scully walked over and picked up the hose that was lying on the ground, she turned the water on and aimed at Mulder. Before he could get out of the way, a spray of water hit him. "I guess I'll just have to clean you off before we go back, won't I."

He made a grab for the hose and turned the spray onto Scully. After a old fashioned water fight, both of them were soaked to the skin. Scully made one last ditch effort to attack and ended up skidding on the mud they had created. She ran into Mulder and they landed in a heap on the ground with Mulder on top. They both realized just how close they were to each other and without thinking Mulder put his head down to kiss Scully as she raised her head to do the same.

At that moment, the telephone rang. Mulder slammed his fist into the mud, "why does that damn thing ring at the most inopertune times?"

Rolling off of Scully, he picked up the phone and handed it to her.

"I don't want to answer it, Mulder. You know it's Skinner. Please, you talk to him."

"I don't want to talk to him. I say we just let it ring."

"Fine, give me the phone. You're gonna owe me for this one buddy."

"Scully, you're an angel."

Scully stuck out her tongue at Mulder and said hello into the phone.

After a minute of solemn conversation, Scully said good bye and hung up.

"Guess?"

"Our wonderful boss and he wants us to take another weeks vacation?" Mulder asked, not even believing it himself.

"Keep on dreaming. He wants us back as soon as we can. He says he's got something he wants to show us."

"Another case?"

"I assume. He didn't want to discuss it over the phone." Scully looked at Mulder with a look of disappointment. "I guess we had better get ready to go. We can either leave tonight and get a decent amount of sleep once we get back or we can stay here and leave about four o'clock tomorrow morning. Which sounds better to you?"

"Neither but I guess going tonight is more practical. We've got a lot to do before we go. Why don't you take your shower first, since you've got more mud on you than I do. I'll put the stuff away out here. Sound good."

Scully just stood there looking at him. "For the first time in my life, I really resent having this job."

Mulder stepped up and faced Scully, "we can always come back you know."

"I know but I want to stay here," not daring to look into his eyes, "with you."

Scully said this then quickly turned and walked into the house. Mulder waited a moment then followed, ignoring the mud he was dripping on the floor. He went upstairs and without knocking, walked into the bathroom. He saw a heap on muddy clothes on the floor and Scully standing in front of the shower clad only in a towel.

"No matter what," Mulder said, trying not to stare at the short towel covering Scully, "promise me that you'll come back here with me, soon. This place wouldn't be the same without you. No matter how busy we are, we'll make the time to get away. Promise?"

She saw the pleading in his eyes and ignoring the fact that she only had a towel on, she walked to him and gave him a hug. "I promise that no matter what, I'll come back here. Nothing could keep me away."

"Honest truth?" Mulder asked quietly.

"Honest truth. Now get out of here before I lose my towel."

"You know Scully, maybe I should stick around. What if you need someone to hand you the soap or wash the bottoms of your feet. I'm really good at that," Mulder stated with a sly grin.

Scully shoved him toward the door, "I'll holler if I need you for anything, now OUT!" She said all this while laughing and trying to keep her towel on.

Mulder grinned and went outside, shutting the door behind him.

About six o'clock, they had gotten everything packed back in the car and were taking a last look around to see if they had locked all the doors and windows. When they were finished, Mulder locked the front door and walked with Scully out to the car.

"You want to drive?" he asked Scully, knowing she would turn the offer down because she didn't enjoy driving at night as much as he did.

"No thanks. With my luck, we'd end up in Canada."

"Just don't forget that I get lost more than you do. Don't yell if we do end up at Niagra Falls or worse."

"I'll take my chances." She settled herself into the passenger seat for the three hour drive ahead. Mulder got behind the wheel and slowly they pulled down the drive, both wishing that they could go back to the moments before the phone rang.

Driving along, both could feel the tension in the car. Mulder was silently cursing the phone and Scully knew he was annoyed, not at her but at how things had turned out. After about twenty minutes, Scully could stand it no longer.

"Mulder."

"Yeah, Scully."

"If a tree fell in the forest and no one was around to hear it, would you insist on investigating it or would you just let it go?" Scully asked in a serious voice.

In an equally serious voice, Mulder answered, "You bet your sweet ass I'd investigate, and I drag you right along with me. Out of curiosity, why do you ask?"

At this, Scully burst out laughing. "I needed to say something to break the tension that seems to have built up in this car and I thought that would do it. From the feel of it, I'd say it worked."

After that, conversation began to flow easier. Mulder began telling Scully about the good times him and Samantha had had up at the house. She curled up on her seat and closed her eyes, enjoying the sound of her partner's voice. Scully felt herself drifting off to sleep and she welcomed the rest after the long day they had had.

Mulder was wishing curses on anyone he could think of when Scully asked him the question about trees. He knew she was trying to lighten the mood he was in and after hearing her laugh, he felt better, although he still wished they had never answered the phone. He began to tell Scully about the things him and his sister did when they were kids. After about fifteen minutes he realized that Scully had stopped responding. He looked over and saw her asleep, with her hair falling over her face. He smiled and reached over to pull up the coat that had slid off her lap. He drove on in silence.

About an hour later, "Mulder ..."

"What is it Scully."

He didn't get a response so he asked again, "What?"

Mulder looked over and realized that Scully was talking in sleep. He reached over and put a hand on her arm. Quietly he said, "go back to sleep."

"No. What would have happened if the phone hadn't rung?" Scully asked in a muffled voice, still sound asleep.

"I think I just might have maybe kissed you." Mulder whispered, not believing he was actually telling her this, asleep or not.

"I would have liked that. Maybe we'll get stuck in the mud again."

"I can only dream," he said, wondering if she would remember any of this when she woke up.

"I like you Mulder. My mom was right, you are a wonderful guy." These last words were mumbled as Scully shifted in her seat and continued her slumber in silence.

Mulder moved his hand down to her knee and gave it a gentle squeeze. "I like you too."

Scully awoke not long after this conversation and from Mulder's view, she didn't remember any of it. He guessed this was just as well. He had no idea how he would react otherwise. They pulled into a gas station to get some coffee and Scully offered to drive the rest of the way.

"No way. We haven't got lost once. I have to drive the whole way so I can use this against you when you get to ripping on me."

"Me. Make fun of you. Never. Where do you get your information from?"

"You."

"Oh. Well, live and learn." Scully hopped back in the car and they continued on their way.

A couple hours later, Mulder turned into Scully's driveway. "Here we are. Why don't you unlock the door while I get your stuff for you."

"What a gentleman." Scully began looking for her keys as she walked to the door. Halfway up the walk, she suddenly stopped dead in her tracks.

Mulder came up behind her, "you do realize you can't reach the door from here, right?" he said playfully.

"If I was at the door, it wouldn't make any difference. I don't have my keys."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean I remember throwing my keys on the counter when we got there. I'm guessing that they're still there." Scully looked up at him in apology. "I forgot to grab them when we left."

"I never thought I'd see the day when you forgot anything. I'm kind of proud. You've come over to the dark side with the rest of us. At least I have my key. I'll get you in and you can thank me generously in any way that you see fit."

"No you can't. I had the locks changed, remember. I made you a key and left it on the counter inside to give to you when you picked me up. You didn't grab it, did you?"

"That would be a big no. How about your neighbors, your mom?"

"No neighbor has a key. I gave mom the new one but she's visiting my brother. She won't be back until tomorrow."

Mulder started back toward the car. "I guess you're stuck with me one more night. Come on, I'm starving. We'll pick up something on the way to my place."

Mulder smiled to himself. Someone upstairs really must like him because now he had Scully to himself for one more night. Scully, in the back of her mind, felt almost guilty because she was glad she had forgotten her keys. Both got into the car and headed for Mulder's apartment, silently happy about how things had turned out.

After picking up food, they pulled up at his apartment. Scully grabbed the food while Mulder grabbed the bags. He grinned as he pulled out his keys and shook them at Scully. "So this is what it's like to be powerful. I think I like it."

"Just open the door house boy," Scully said over the bags she was holding.

"With pleasure madam."

They got into the apartment and immediately attacked the food. Within minutes they had devoured most of it and Mulder put the rest in the refrigerator to have for breakfast.

"Well sir, who gets the couch," Scully asked, eyeing what Mulder considered his bed.

"Guests get the couch, pure and simple. I'll get you another blanket." Mulder scurried off before she could argue. He returned with a real pillow as well. "I've been saving this for a special occasion. Here you go," he said, tossing the pillow at her.

"Wow, I'm now considered a special occasion. Most would tell me to pull up a piece of floor. I think I like it here." Scully began digging through her bag and a second later produced her pj's, which consisted of a pair of shorts and the Knicks shirt Mulder had given her for her birthday as a joke.

"I told you I'd wear it." Scully said, although she was thinking how she rarely slept in anything else.

She changed while Mulder set his "bed" up on the floor next to the couch. Scully laid down and Mulder turned out the light. He settled himself down and called goodnight. A few seconds later, Scully's head appeared over the side of the couch. "I'm getting the strangest feeling of de `ja vu, how 'bout you?"

Mulder reached up and grabbed her hand. Putting it on his chest and wrapping his own hand around it, he grinned and looked up at Scully, "I am now."

He closed his eyes and drifted off knowing that he wouldn't have any nightmares that night. It took Scully a little longer to fall asleep but she did eventually, safe in the knowledge that Mulder was next to her, wanting her close.

The next morning, Mulder woke up to the sound of the shower turning off. A moment later, Scully walked out the door and much to Mulder's surprise, she was wearing his robe. She looked at him, then grinned. "I hope you don't mind that I borrowed it."

Mulder just nodded, afraid that if he opened his mouth, he would give away what he was thinking: that he had never seen Scully more beautiful, standing in his bathroom doorway dripping on his floor. He realized that Scully said something else. Embarrassed, he asked her to repeat her statement.

Amused, "I was curious as to what Skinner might think if I went to the office in this?"

Still slightly distracted, "Why?"

"Because I don't have any clothes here. This is not my place, remember. I sure can't go in wearing a pair of cut offs and a torn t-shirt now can I?"

"I could guess the reaction would be quite interesting. It would only add fuel to the fire about us being 'not quite right'. Hell, I think you should go in the robe."

"Mulder, you really are nuts aren't you?"

"I can only try. Now, ask me if I have anything you can wear."

"What. Why would you have anything of mine? You been raiding my closets again?"

Laughing, Mulder replied, "no, but I think I can come up with something."

At that, he disappeared into the closet and emerged with one of Scully's jackets and a pair of slacks. She just stared at him, "where in the world did those come from?"

"From the dry cleaner. Where else?"

"OK, I see we're going to do this the hard way. Why do you have my clothes from the dry cleaner?"

"I just enjoy playing with your mind. You asked me to pick them up before you went to the hospital."

"Mulder, that was over a month ago! You've had them that long and you didn't give them to me."

Shrugging his shoulders, Mulder put on his best 'I'm sorry, will you forgive me' look and stuck out his bottom lip. Scully couldn't resist that, no matter how hard she tried and both of them knew it. She groaned and took the clothes back to the bathroom with her. Scully stopped before she closed the door, "why can't I ever stay mad at you?"

Without missing a beat, " 'cause I'm cute." He left her in the doorway and he walked into the kitchen whistling.

After they had finished breakfast which consisted of the leftovers, Scully called her mom and left a message that they would be by later in the afternoon to get her key. She walked down to the car while Mulder finished trying to get his hair to obey. She stifled a laugh when he came down and she saw that he had not succeeded. "Don't even say it."

Innocently, Scully replied, "say what."

"Why do I hang out with you again?"

Using his own retort against him, " 'cause I'm cute."

"And you always seem to be right." Both got into the car and headed towards the city.

They went straight to Skinner's office after Mulder parked the car. The door was open so they peered inside. Skinner looked up, "good morning. I didn't expect you here so soon."

Scully spoke up, "we came back last night. It was easier than leaving at three o'clock this morning."

"At any rate, I'm sorry to cut the vacation short."

"It's all right," Mulder said, pulling out a chair for Scully, then taking a seat next to her.

"Well, keep that good attitude for a few minutes longer. The police caught the guy who was going to be your next case."

Mulder laid his head back on the chair, "meaning vacation was cut short for no real reason."

"Mulder, I only found out about an hour ago. I tried up at your mother's place but no one answered. I am sorry."

Scully cut in, giving Mulder her patent ' don't say a word' glance, "it's OK. We have some stuff to catch up on anyway." She stood up and put her hand on Mulder's shoulder, "come on, let's go wade through your office. You don't have any excuse for not doing some cleaning now that I've seen you scrub more than your coffee mug."

Mulder got up and nodded to Skinner. Both walked out of the office and down to the basement. Mulder opened the door and Scully turned on the light. They were greeted by their familiar clutter and a six day old donut on Mulder's desk.

He laughed and Scully smiled, "Oops. That would be mine wouldn't it?"

Scully picked up the donut and banged the side of the desk. She handed it to Mulder, "here, you needed a new paper weight anyway."

Both settled in and began to read their mail, which had piled up quite a bit while they were gone. About an hour later, Mulder got up to go get some coffee. He returned with a puzzled look on his face.

"What is it?" Scully asked, confused.

"I just ran into Skinner and he said since we had to come back early, we can finish our vacation anytime and we'll get two extra days."

"I'd think you were playing with me again but I have a feeling you're not. You are serious, right?"

"Oh yeah. When do we leave?"

"We?"

Turning red, Mulder stammered, "I just kind of assumed that we could go back to the house. I guess I should have asked first, huh?"

"In this case, assumptions are truth. We should probably stick around here for awhile though. All's I know is I still want my full vacation and I plan on getting it."

"A woman of action, I like that. It fits you well." Mulder sat back at his desk and both continued to catch up on the last week.

The phone rang later and Scully got called up to the labs. Mulder decided he might as well surprise Scully with a semi-clean office so he got to work as soon as she left. She returned around three and found Mulder reading in his chair, the room around him cleaner than it had been in five years. She stood in the doorway, shocked. He got up and took her arm, "take a good look around Scully. It may never look like this again."

"You have just rendered me completely speechless. You know, I never knew your desk had a top. I'm impressed."

Suddenly, Scully turned to him, "you want to get out of here. Mom should be home by now."

"Excellent thinking. If I'm stuck down here another minute, I may have to scream." He grabbed his keys and led Scully out the door, turning the lights off as he went.

On the way to her mom's house, Scully called again. Her mom answered and Scully told her they were on their way. When she hung up, Mulder looked at Scully, "why didn't you tell her what happened? She's probably been wondering since she got home."

"It will be easier to tell her when we get there. The story is a little to crazy to tell over the phone. Besides, if I know my mother, she'll keep us for dinner and make us tell her all over again."

"Dinner. That reminds me, I'm starving. What do you think she'll have?"

"Mulder, you're incorrigible. Turn up here."

As he made the turn, "you're brother isn't going to be there is he?"

Surprised, Scully turned to look at him, "No, why?"

"Because I get the impression that none of your brothers like me?"

With a little smile, "they never liked any guy I was friends with. It's just that whole protective thing. You wouldn't have liked any of the guys Sam went out with either."

In a quiet voice, "did you realize that that's the first time you called her Sam instead of Samantha?"

"I'm sorry. I guess being up at the house made her seem more real that ever. I didn't mean any offense"

"No," Mulder said in a louder voice, "I like that you feel comfortable enough to call her that. When you say it, your voice doesn't carry the hint of contempt that everyone else's does."

Scully looked at him and put her hand on his thigh, "one day Mulder, I would like to meet your sister and tell her what a wonderful brother she's got."

Feeling the pressure of Scully's hand, "I'll have to tell her what a wonderful partner I've got."

They drove on in silence, Scully leaving her hand on Mulder's leg. About twenty minutes later, Mulder pulled into Mrs. Scully's driveway and turned off the car. Scully's mom had already opened the door for them and was standing there, waving. Scully opened the door and gave her mom a hug and a kiss. Mrs. Scully then turned to Mulder and on reflex, he gave her a hug as well.

She was surprised by this and said with a smile, "thank you Fox. I didn't expect that but I will from now on."

"Mom, don't call him Fox."

"Don't worry about it Scully. Your mom is one of the few people in the world who can get away with calling me that."

"OK. Fox, Dana, first question - why do you need my key? and second - are you hungry?"

Mulder looked at Scully with a smile that said I told you so. "It's a long story and we're starving, at least I am."

"Then how about I go find us some dinner." Mulder and Scully followed her into the kitchen, with Mulder pulling Scully's hair as they walked down the hall. Both sat down at the counter and began to tell the story of the last week, interrupting each other good naturedly. They continued to talk through dinner and then they moved to the living room. Mulder took a seat by Scully on the couch. They finished their tale and Mrs. Scully laughed at both of them.

"Thank you Fox, for getting Dana out of that office of yours. I think she went back to work to soon but you know her, she never listens to anyone."

"No problem. Besides, she didn't have much of a choice. I told her if she didn't come, I'd hound her the entire time I was gone."

Scully hit Mulder in the knee, "Mom, I wouldn't have put it past him either," she said with a laugh. "I would have been getting calls at three a.m. telling me that he hit his thumb with the hammer or that the crickets were loud and the grass was a great shade of green. Although I'll say this, I've never had a more relaxing vacation." She glanced at Mulder, "thanks."

They continued their conversation until, without warning, Mulder dropped his head on Scully's shoulder, sound asleep. Mrs. Scully smiled when she noticed that her daughter's eyes had begun to drop as well. She got up and left them on the couch, turning off the lights as she went.

Scully and Mulder awoke around nine-thirty, confused because neither had realized they had fallen asleep. They wandered into the kitchen to find Mrs. Scully reading at the kitchen table. "Why did you let us fall asleep?" Scully demanded.

"Because I will not have either of you falling asleep on the highway. I've lost one daughter, I don't see a reason to lose another or her handsome partner. Don't you feel better though."

Sheepishly Scully replied, "yeah. Thanks." She looked at Mulder, "I guess we should get going."

"Let's move out then." They all walked to the door and Mulder gave Mrs. Scully another hug and a giant kiss on the cheek. Scully laughed, "trying to outdo me, partner."

"Yup." He went out the door to turn the car on, leaving both of them laughing on the front porch.

Scully gave her mom a big hug. "I'll get your key back to you. Thanks for dinner."

Mrs. Scully held on for a moment and said, "come back soon and don't forget to bring that nice young man. I enjoy his company immensely."

"So do I, mom. He'll come back, if only for the free meal and the hug." Scully walked down the sidewalk where Mulder was patiently waiting, holding the door for her. They got in and drove of down the street, waving.

"That one had better not get away." Mrs. Scully thought to herself with a smile as she turned to go back into the house.

Once they got back, Mulder dropped Scully back at her house. He went in to retrieve his key and decided he had better get out of there fast because if he didn't, he just might do something both of them would regret. Mulder said a quick goodbye and practically ran to the car, leaving Scully more than a little confused. She shrugged her shoulders and got ready for bed, hurt that he didn't even make an attempt to stay for awhile.

Mulder, on the other hand, sat in his car around the corner, yelling at himself for being such an ass. He debated whether or not to turn around and go back but decided Scully would probably be mad and right now, that would have killed him. He drove home slowly, knowing that he'd be alone and cursing himself because of it.

Scully hadn't been able to sleep at all and around ten-thirty, she heard a pounding on her door. It annoyed her a little because she wanted to wallow in her self-pity awhile longer. Then she looked at the clock and realized just how late it was. She got up, picked up her gun and went to look out the peephole. Scully saw Mulder standing there with his hands in his pockets. She debated whether to let him in but decided she had better. Upon opening the door, Mulder rushed in and grabbed her in a hug, holding her tightly.

"Mulder, what are you doing? Why aren't you at home?"

Easing up a bit, he looked at her, "I tried to go home but when I got there I realized something. You weren't there with me. I suddenly missed you terribly and decided that I needed to come here."

Scully was shocked. Usually when Mulder said these kinds of things, he would stammer, look embarrassed and avoid eye contact. Tonight however, he said them in confidence, looking straight into her eyes. "Why did you need to come here?" Scully asked, both afraid of what might happen and hoping that it would.

"Because I've wanted to do this for about four years now and tonight seems like the proper time." Before Scully could reply, Mulder covered her lips with his. With that one kiss, all five years of hidden feelings Scully kept inside rushed to the surface, and she held onto Mulder as if her life depended on it.

They dropped onto Scully's couch. "By the way, this is what I would have done while in that pool of mud."

She pulled him closer and began to take off his shirt, "this is what I would have done."

At that moment, by some sick twist of fate, the phone rang. Mulder put his head on Scully's chest, "don't answer that, please!"

Scully gave him a quick kiss and reached behind her for the phone, hoping that it wasn't Skinner. "Hello ... mom ... what is it, it's late. Well yeah, I was right in the middle of something."

Mulder chose at that moment to make his presence known. He called "hi Mrs. Scully. How are you doing?"

With that, he began to free Scully from her shirt as well. With a look of complete contentment, Scully said into the phone, "yes mom ... that is what I'm in the middle of ... Call me tomorrow, late." With that she hung up the phone and continued what she had started.

Mulder suddenly looked up from his exploration of Scully's stomach. "I just realized something. I am completely, helplessly, hopelessly, madly in love with you."

"To tell you the truth Mulder, I will love you forever: completely, helplessly, hopelessly and madly."

Without a word, Mulder picked Scully up and carried her into the bedroom. Both decided that the rest of their vacation would be spent in Scully's bed, starting now.

[lolana07]

I saw this ask and i just had to take over/make my own post and add bc i just had too many secondary thoughts and the ask set me off and i didn't want to take over the original post  :)

Spoilers!

To start, as the Dr. refers, yes, unfortunately you can remove some of these characters, men and women, and still get along with the story. Hopefully this is fixed in 3b, as the majority of the cast were on their own storylines, except for the Clarks. This post is going to be long bc I’ve get to get all my thoughts out so, sorry if this isn’t exactly what you were looking for!

Interestingly enough, Travis, the male lead, was killed off early on with little consequence other than to advance Madison’s storyline/development (I’m not into the know enough to be aware of anything beyond what I watch on the screen and have no idea about actors/directors etc..). However, this MCD, imo, was done horribly wrong, as his death didn’t have any consequence to the plot or characters other than for a short time Madison, and maybe Alicia. Travis got a badass pit fight scene and then it wasn’t clear when, but he was bit at some point in the pit, and then shot in the helicopter, and …. just kinda fell out the door to his death? To me this is an instance where the male was removed from the story, and almost nothing changed in the plot other than some side emotions. Legit everything he did in the show was worthless (I didn’t like Chris but do the characters even remember him?) and largely forgotten really quickly by the few characters who knew him and knew about his death. Maybe Strand or Daniel will be upset when they find out? But probably not. So, while it flips the whole, character A dies for male advancement idea, his death was largely forgotten about in 3a.

Then you’ve got Ofelia, Daniel and Strand, who all are almost entirely not necessary for the main plot with the Clarks. Makes me think they are deliberately trying to do a GOT thing where there are various plots that are separate and come together in the end…which only really works for GOT, and imo not so much here. While Daniel got what I think was a standout episode, which sadly isn’t saying much for the rest, he didn’t even see the Clarks this season. At all. Same with Strand, although he legit did nothing for the plot, and somehow got a radio signal from an astronaut? WHAT? If science can explain this, please do, otherwise, WHAT?! He had some touching scenes, but I felt his ‘development’ was anticipated. Like we knew he was going to stand up and dust off, so everything that happened felt stale? Idk. Hopefully it changes in 3b, they need to get back to the Clarks and set them on the right path again. PS: The boat had more development than Strand...

And Ofelia. My dear Ofelia. Idk, but I’ve seen some posts about her ‘transformation’ being called character development this season.  .. -- …… ----.. No. Development means time needs to be spent on the change, and more than 15 minutes. She also is the ‘love interest’ referred to in the ask above (I know this reply probably isn’t what you were expecting right?). She more or less exists to provide a link to the ‘bad guys’ and humanize the main ‘bad guy’. I don’t think she became a badass, because she didn’t really do anything besides spy and pass information. She had a great moment where she snapped out of her memory loss, and vocalized that she cared for the Clarks and remembered that they took her in and she left via her own free will, but then….that’s it? Broken record, but maybe in 3b.. PS: She remembered Travis!! She actually said something about Travis to Alicia, at least someone does! PSS: Her big moment was to be used as a chip for Madison, ugh Madison wtffff

So, it’s not just a lady issue, the men get it too this season. And I say ‘bad guy’ above bc if you watch, the ranch leaders are really the bad guys, and ranch folks are the ignorant and innocent civilians, and the Native American are the ‘good guys’, in a very basic summary. That’s a whole different topic and aspect of 3a that I liked, of the very few.

I guess you could also include Qaletaqa Walker into all of this as well, because he was set up as the main ‘bad guy’ and was ultimately the only ‘bad guy’ we were familiarized with. Kind of made that who group static, with him being the sole focal point, taking out what would have been some great character moments for him. Plus, one of the only (?) times he interacted with a Clark, the information he shared was used against him. More on that later, Alicia wtf. Ofelia being his new gf was underdeveloped and solely to humanize him. Idk, both characters really lost out, I think Qaletaqa could have developed really well…if only all the brain power wasn’t hap hazardously put into the typical racist white ranch ‘good guy’ storyline...sigh..that’s some difficult storytelling there. original. While Qaletaqa’s character couldn’t be removed without changing the plot a little bit, I feel like another leader character could have taken his place and the plot would have gotten along just fine, with Qaletaqa as a background character. Really missed out here.

Alicia however, is the only Clark who I think was on point this season and got the best character development. She might have gotten the most development of all the characters on the show, which is great for her, but legit no one else did anything or really developed imo. I suppose you could say Madison de-veloped, but ugh more on her later or in another post bc this is getting looong. And real quick to sum up Nick, his gf left (another character who got removed with no repercussions) and he is just a mopey sad little thing that somehow gets the big moment of killing mr. ranch dad? WTF? Seriously? That was Madison’s moment, even if I’m rather upset with her this season. That was alllll Madison, and he just….WTF. WWWWWWTTTTTTTTTFFFFFFF. And Madison covers for you why???? WTFFFF Madison stop putting Nick on some platform of all holiness WTFFFFF. 

Anyway. Alicia calls them out hardcore on their shit while Nick has a random moment of clarity..

then we get a story from Madison that makes it all okay.... 

Alicia has been developing at a snail’s pace compared to everyone else, which is crazy bc shes 18 and is legit on the brink of major life advancement when shit goes down. So she should really develop much faster, and not be sheltered by her mom anymore (its season 3 FFS!) and not being overshadowed by Nick (srsly will Madison ever just focus on Alicia while Nick is in the same room?), and not be ignored by almost everyone (Gretch and Jake). Idk, imo. Even still, she goes from shock/wtf from Travis’ death, so numb about life and love is weakness, and then starts to thaw and develop the feels for Jake, all the while being the only main character who has a moral compass and uses it without being a typical stick in the mud all hoity being morally right and all. She starts off by saying, Mom maybe we should take care of ourselves instead of trying to find Nick who clearly doesn’t want to be found, and then of course they  miraculously run into him.. Then she’s like, fuck it all I’m going to go to BibIe study with my new friend Gretchen (AHH I loved her but wtf). Idk she just got the best development imo, even though she had the least screen time of the Clarks. Almost every scene she was with brought her character forwards and changed her, rather than stunted her. And to get back to that main ask real quick, she actually used the hahaha fuck out of Jake at first. Not the other way around. She then teamed up with him, but her using him didn’t advance his story at all, it advanced hers. You get some girl! Jake is her love interest, or lust, not the other way around.

Ugh anyway, she and Jake tried to negotiate and even though we knew it was going to fail, bc the situation was beyond that, kudos for them for even trying! No one else did! Plus i thought this little scene was great between her an Qaletaqa. I wish we saw/are going to see more of them together as allies, i think they both did really well acting-wise together.

They tried to stay on the wrong side, and then Alicia gets manipulated and lied to by Madison and Nick, and is unknowingly on the wrong side. Thank LAWRD she did not apologize for what she said to Madison, I hope she doesn’t. The main thing I didn’t like is that she used Qaletaqa’s heritage against him. Sure it was under Madison’s thumb, but still, Alicia should have known better. I mad at her for that. At the end, I think the last scene we see her in, where she’s overlooking the ranch, I think its showing her just being fed up with this shit lol, ugh at least I hope so. Something about that shot really set her on her own path for me, as Madison and Nick were out of focus, she ended entirely in focus. Loved it.

[tellerford13]

MO ASTOR- CHAPTER 28

We don’t own the bikes, brothers, or any “related” Sons of Anarchy, trust us, if we did we wouldn’t have the time to write. No money is being made from our stories. So, please don’t sue. It’d be a fruitless endeavor indeed. That being said, Harley, Journee, and any other newbies are ours, and we don’t share. :Whispers in creepy voice: “My precious.” The universe This reality is a mix of cannon, and our own ideas. We strive to keep the boys cannon, but since we will be shifting around some of the events, that will reflect in our writing and their personalities as well. It’s our goal to provide you with quality fiction, and solid, fleshed out OFC. We appreciate constructive criticism and love LOVE reviews, they are a writers life blood and definitely help encourage us and inspire us. We will be posting on our Tumblr where we’ll have fun pictures from time to time as well. http://tellerford13.tumblr.com We’ll also be taking requests for one shots, preferences or imagines for all things Sons at our other Tumblr, so check it out and send your thoughts!http://tellerford13oneshots.tumblr.com/ And just for fun, we’ve decided to start a Pinterest for the story! So if you want a glimpse at our girls and see into our world, check it out! https://www.pinterest.com/tellerford/

A/N: Thank you all for your continued support! It truly means the world.

                                       Mo-Astor Chapter 28

Chibs

“How’s married life treating you?” Tig asks.

I turn to him and narrow my eyes. It can be hard to decipher how he means something by tone, but we’re close enough for me to read his mannerisms. His eyes are steady, and his facial expression is serious for once.

“Damn good, and you know it.”

He grins. “Yeah, I did. Wanted to hear it from your own mouth though. Not many of us get a shot at the real deal. I watched the two of you dance around each other for years. I wasn’t surprised really when you came out with your relationship. Hell, I would’ve taken a crack at her if I didn’t know where both your hearts lied.

I smile. He never misses a beat, even if he keeps it to himself. “And you weren’t going to clue me in?”

“Nah, you weren’t ready. Wouldn’t do me any good to tell you what you weren’t open to hearing. It’s funny you and the little prince all paired up and making actual homes and families. Clubs moving into the next generation.”

The wistful tone of his voice surprises me. He’s one of the many that love the life we live.

“You looking to settle down?”  I ask, surprised by his seemingly sudden change of heart

“If I had a chance to do it again, right… maybe.” His face ripples like a disturbed pond and the ever-present grin returns. “Besides I got a wife by proxy now.” he pats me on the back, and I shake my head as I chuckle.  “Aye.”

“She knew that before you two married right? No way is she breaking up my bromance.” He wraps an arm around my shoulder, and I laugh. Things are never dull with ole Tiggy around.

“Pretty sure she understood that since she hasn’t broken her foot off in your arse when you call her wifey.”

He throws his head back and laughs. “Oh, she’s rubbing off on you big time, Scottie.”

“Can’t say I mind it.”

“Yeah, I bet you aren’t, seeing as how it’s not the only thing she’s doing on you.”

I can’t help but stand a bit taller and smile when he says it. She’s all mine. My lovely lass to spoil and care for until I take my last breath. It’s more than I dared hope for or deserve.

“It must be good since you aren’t biting my head off.”

“For what? I’m not ashamed of anything we do. I’m well aware of how much of a lucky fuck I am.”

“That’s my Chibby.” He kisses my cheek, and I laugh as I finish my cigarette. I been cutting down since I got serious with Journee. I have a young lass to keep my health and other things up for.

I toss the butt on the ground and grind the dying embers out with my steel toe just in case.

“Ye let Wifey catch a hint of that change of heart, and she’ll be playing matchmaker.”

He turns thoughtful again. “Maybe one day I’ll let her.”

“Do I even want to know?” Clay asks as he joins us outside, effectively sending this softer side of Tig into hiding.

“I was asking him about married life.”

“Ahh. So what’s the verdict Chibby? She worth wearing the ole ball and chain for?”

“Always,” I say putting enough edge in my voice to be let him know I won’t be talking shit about my old lady while remaining respectful to his position. Some of the brothers treat their women worse than they do the crow eaters. I could never wrap me head around it personally. Why marry at all if it isn’t for love?

“Huh. Give it a few years until the new wears off,” Clay mumbles.

I grunt. “Can’t see it ever wearing.”

“Must be different when your wife is young, shiny and new. You married well. Between Gem and Happy, I never thought the poor girl would be claimed.”

“Guess it just took the right man.”

He eyes me with a narrowed gaze. I tense, unsure what he’s after. “Good answers.” He pats my shoulder and squeezes, and I feel a breath I didn’t know I was holding release. He was testing me. She’d lived under his roof for a spell and held the moniker Teller. Hearing him talk about her so callously would’ve made me reconsider the way I viewed my President. Testing, however, is something I’m very used to.

“You’ve got nothing to worry about from me, Clay. Journee is the only woman I even see.”

“Make sure it stays that way, or there’ll be hell to pay from more than one person around here,” he mumbles.

I smirk. It’s nice knowing my club has my old ladies back. “I keen it when I started a relationship with her. Gem and Jackie boy were both pretty vocal.”

“They would be,” Clay mumbles as he lights up his cigar. “I like to keep a happy home and a cohesive club. So you got to watch your step.”

“I think he’s got it handled. Chibs is a smooth motherfucker,” Tig says patting my back.

Clay nods his head. “Keep it that way? Happy wife, happy life.”

“Got it.”

It’s new territory in the club, this intermarrying. There aren’t many daughters still in good standing with their fathers around here, and Lee nor Journee have brought home local boys they were serious about. Lee was with Kick for some time, but his affiliation with the Grim Bastards always kept us well aware of the boundaries we could and couldn’t cross unprovoked. Not that he ever gave us a reason. The boy was as laid back as they come in the life. Part of me wonder why they never worked out, and the other is just happy they didn’t because Jax needs her to remain grounded. I’ve watched him struggle to keep his head above water. He’s tough in a lot of ways, but emotionally, he’s always needed an anchor.

Journee’s always taken some of that burden onto herself. It’s what siblings do, but it’s never the same as having a significant other who could hold you down. Lee in her role as bestfriend went a long way, but it was no contest to them now.

They’d have their growing pains, but I got a gut feeling this is exactly as it should be. She was always meant to be the queen. We could see it in everything Gem set up and said.  She’s a master chess player, moving pieces around on the board. It makes her a bit terrifying to have as a mother-in-law.

“Alright, I’m going in. I got two more cars to finish before I can call it a day, and I don’t want to to be here any longer than I need to.”

“So cute, still in that honeymoon stage,” Tig drawls. I flip him off as I walk back inside, but I don’t deny it.  

***

I open the door with Juice trailing behind me and I hide a smile. We’ve all settled into a routine I like. I never thought I’d have a family again in the traditional sense, and having the man-child I’ve always seen as a son under the same roof as my wife is everything. The smell of fresh bread and something mouthwatering fills my nostrils. She’s arranged her schedule, so she’s home by the time we get there more days than not, or makes a meal in the slow cooker. I’m fast forgetting the days of fast food, shitty crow cooking, and cold beds.

“Lass, something smells good.” I hang my cut on the hooks she’s set up for me and Juicy and walk through the living room to the kitchen where I find her and Opie’s daughter, Ellie.

“Ellie girl,” I say cheerfully.

She looks up at me and offers a small smile. “Hi, Uncle Chibs.” Donna is damn particular about who she allows the kids to be around. After Opie went in, most contact with the club stopped unless Gemma forced it. She allowed Journee and Lee to stay close, but I think Piney and Opie himself had something to do with that. As the children’s Godmothers, their bonds went deeper than the club.

“Baby boy has soccer games, so me and Ms. Ellie hung out and made dinner.”

Ellie nods happily.

“Whatever it is you’re making, it smells delicious girls. We’ll just wash up before dinner.”

“Is Juice here?” Ellie asks cheerfully. I hide my laughter. He’s a favorite with ladies of all ages.

“Hey Ell,” Juice says coming over to hug Journee and Ellie who blushes.

“Hi, Juice,” She says quietly.

“How’ve you been?”

“Good.”

“Better than good, tell them what you did last week,” Journee says. gently nudging her to open up.

“I got the lead role in the school play. I’m going to be Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz,” she says.

“Did you hear that? My niece is a star!” Journee says enthusiastically.

Ellie blushes. “It’s just a school play.”

“Oh no, you’re not downplaying this. That’s awesome.”

“Aye, she’s right, love. That’s brilliant. Congratulations on the role.”  She’s so much like her father, tall for her age and quiet until she has something to say.

“Ma, what are we having anyways?” Juice asks.

She laughs. “Irish Beef Stew and Soda Bread.”

I moan. “I’m going to have to start running if you keep feeding me so well.” I lean in and steal a kiss, careful to keep it chaste in front of Ellie. Last thing I want to do is set Donna off about what she thinks is inappropriate behavior around a child. Once Opie went in she went into helicopter parent mode. I understand why, but it made her seem almost shrewish and uptight. It was such a departure from the woman she once was it saddened me to see.

“Can you set the table for six?” Journee asks.

“Lee and Jax coming over?” I ask.

“Yeap.”

“Alright.” It’s a pretty regular occurrence we eat at their house, or they come to ours. I think the girls are still trying to make up for the two-week separation. I don’t mind. We always have more to eat than we need. My little lass cooks for many. Can’t blame her the way Happy and Tig drop in. I get the feeling my best friend is lonely these days. With no Juice around to amuse him or me to shoot the shit with. I got to tell her about his moment of seriousness. Being Lee’s best friend, she gets Tig more than most. He’s been a surrogate Uncle. Albeit a pervy one.

I move through the bathroom and switch over to jeans and a black t-shirt.

“Hey, I think this is yours,” Juice says from the doorway. I spot the letter in his hand.

“Why would you be getting mail for me?”

“Well, I don’t’ know any Padraic in Ireland.”

I grin and hurry over. “This is from me nephew.”

“I figured seeing a how he has the same last name and all.”

I quickly open the letter, and my heart nearly stops at the site of the feminine handwriting. It’s from me Keri. My vision wavers and my knees go weak. I lean against the doorframe as I try to catch my bearings.

“Ma.”

I can hear Juicy beside me, but I’m unable to focus. I’m half afraid to look at the letter. What if she’s cursing me out for all the things I did wrong? I’m not sure I could stand to read that.

“Filip?”

I glance up into worried brown irises.

“It’s from Kerianne.” My hand trembles slightly.

She takes the letter from me and opens it up. Her eyes quickly scan the letter, and she smiles before she hands it over to me.

“Why don’t you take this to your chair in the living room? We’ll get the rest of dinner ready, okay?”

I trust her judgment. I nod, unable to speak around the lump damn near choking me.

“Why don’t you get your Da a glass of whiskey Juan Carlos,” Journee says in that sweet voice, that helps ease my fear. I don’t’ care about much in this world, but my daughter is my heartbeat. I don’t remember the walk to the chair, suddenly, I’m simply there and plopping down onto the gray lazy boy with a plaid blanket tossed across the back. Journee keeps it frosty to combat the heat. I pull the blanket over my lap and unfold the paper I swear holds a light floral scent, even after it’s trip across the ocean.

Da,

I’m really not sure what to say. After being denied contact, it’s so odd to write this, and know you’ll read it. I have so many questions. Do you like America? What do you do? Do you think about me? You said you did, but the way Mom talked…I always thought you never looked back.

I growl. Fucking, Fiona. Next time out paths crossed we’d have words. Two more years until my she hits eighteen, goes to Uni, and I gain more freedom.

I’ve wondered about you often. I know I have your eyes and Mom says your temperament. She’s quick to anger, and you have a slow burn, she said. I’ve never met Aunt Greer, but I see Padraic often. We’re pretty close. He makes me laugh, and Mom and him will actually allow me to go places with him. Paddy says your wife is nice, Journee. I saw a picture. She’s very beautiful.

Her words make my heart sing. There’s nothing I want more in the world than for the two of them to get along.

Do you think she’ll like me? I know you said I might be able to visit… what will she think? I know she’s really young, and mom says. Well. Stepmothers are the villains in books for a reason.

No, KerriAnne, no one wants you here more than your stepmother. I’m mentally writing a response as I continue to devour her words. She writes for the school’s newspaper, belongs to the Spanish club, and works for the stage crew. She enjoys drama but has no desire to be on stage. Her favorite color is sky blue, and she loved the dress we picked out for her. I close my eyes and hold the paper tight. Every detail she’s given me brings me closer to her. The saying better late than never rings in my head. I’ll take this second chance and make it work.  

“You look like you need this.” I glance over and find Juicy holding out a glass of Jamison.

“Thank ye, lad.”

“Everything okay?”

“Aye. The letter took me by surprise. It was from me daughter. We’re back in contact through ma nephew.”

“Oh.”

“I’m sure he used your name to make sure Jimmy didn’t have a reason to suspect anything.”

“Oh, that’s cool. You know I’m happy to help any way I can.”

“That I do. You’re a good lad.”

I’ll never stop missing Kerianne, or regretting the time we’ve missed out on, but I have something here I won't’ take for granted.                                                                                                                                                                              

***

“Tonight was fun. I like it when we all get together,” Journee says. I blink to ease my straining eyes and set the Stephen King book on my nightstand. I focus on my wife and my jaw drops. She’s in a soft pink camisole with flowers and a deep V, that has her full breasts nearly spilling free.

“Filip, I keep telling you to get your eyes checked.”

“I see just fine. Come here.”

She tilts her head and shakes her head coyly. “No, tonight is for you.” She walks over and climbs onto the bed, straddling my legs. “Daddy had a rough night, didn’t he?”

I nod, unable to resist the spell she’s weaving. It’s rare when she takes the lead like this. She’s still finding herself, and I’ll be damned If I do anything to discourage that. She massages my shoulders, and I lean back into the bed, watching her full lips as she comes closer. I trace her lips, and she opens taking me inside her mint flavored mouth. Our tongues tangle, and she circles her hips, grinding into me. My cock twitches and comes to life hardening as it stains to escape my boxers and get inside her heat. She takes a shaky breath. Her eyes are nearly black with passion.

She leans her head back, and I’m mesmerized by the sensual picture she presents. Her lips are parted, and her face is a work of art painted with passion.

“Ye’re so beautiful, Mo astor,” I whisper.

Her lips tilt upward. “You make me feel that way.”  She tugs my shirt up, and we work it over my head. It lands on the floor with a whisper of sound. Her nails rake down my chest.

“Jaysus.” She bends down and nips at my stiff nipple , circling the other with her nail. I never even knew this turned me on. She takes her time, sucking, pinching, and teasing me as she slowly works her way down my body. My cock is at attention when she reaches the waist band of my boxers. Her eyes sparkle as she looks up and slides her hand under my waist band.

I lift my hips, working with her as she strokes me fast, and grips me tight. She bends down and circles my slit with the tip of her tongue. The muscles in my belly clench. She takes me deep, and I fight the urge to slam up and fuck her mouth. She hums and meets my gaze, loosening her throat. No words are necessary. I know she’s ready for me now. I drive home as she sucks me and bobs her head. Her mouth is a hot wet sanctuary that’s squeezing me just right.

I forget everything but the feel of her mouth suctioning around me and the look of complete acceptance and love in her eyes. She releases me with a pop, and I groan.

“Not where I want you to come, Daddy.”

“Then bring that pussy here to me love.”

She rips my boxers off with an urgency that has me leaking pre-come. She holds my base and eases down on me, inch by inch, wiggling as her body yields, and she struggles to fit me all in her tight core.

“So slick and tight, love.”

“Always for you.”

Fully seated, she presses her hands to my chest and eases up then drops down.  She’s so wet she’s leaking all over, coating me with her desire.

“Just like that, love,” I whisper as I gather her wetness and circle her clit. I met her stroke for stroke as she loves me slow and thorough. I grip her hips and drive up, desperate to go deeper. She flexes around me.

“Oh, Daddy. I- I’m going to.” She splinters, contracting around me like a vice. My balls draw up, and I let go, spilling into her as she cries out, shaking. She collapses on top of me, and I plant kisses on her face. She giggles.

“Tickles, Daddy.”

I plant a kiss on her forehead and pull her closer as we catch our breath.

“I should move.”

“Let me fall asleep inside you tonight, lennan.”

“Aye,” She says.

I chuckle. “Laugh it up, Lass.”

“Are you feeling better?”

“Much.” I roll the ideal over in my head. “How would you feel about Kerrianne coming to visit.”

“When? I can get the spare room set up for her next to Juicy.”

I laugh at her enthusiasm. “I dunnae when. I haven’t asked her yet. Wanted to run it by you.”

“Your family is mine, Filip. You know that. She’s always got a home with us.”

“I’m jumping the gun. We’re just now reconnecting, but I’d like to give her the option for at least visiting for the summer, maybe even going to university here, near us?”

“We can more than afford it,” She whispers.

I smile. She’s had access to my account for years now. I needed someone to handle things when I couldn’t or if I died. It’s a real issue I never ignored. I needed to know my Kerrianne would be taken care of after I was gone.

“I love you, Journee Telford.”

“I Love you too, Filip Telford.”

[xtoxicblueberry]

((not my art, that was done by the wonderful, and lovely @ronyascribbles)

“ I will help you if so desired, if you need my staff or bow just call me. ”

Name: Kari Age: 20-24 Gender: Female Nationality: Nohrian Race: Human Birthday: 08/02

Height: 5'4" (162.56 cm ) Eye color: Apple green Hair color: Light blue Hair style: Typically up, mainly in twin tails. She will wear it in a bun if she’s either in the bath house or its just a super hot day. Though she will wear it down at times. Clothing style: Other then her adventure outfit that she wears to battle; she typically wears comfy clothes. Tank tops and short shorts or pants, depending on the weather. Her clothes are typically black.

Hobies: walking Around, exploring, window shopping. Likes: Talking to people she gets along with, playing with Animals, looking at things she finds interesting, almost all things sweet, ice coffee, relaxing, enjoying nature, making up stories about her scars and seeing how far she can go and what people would believe, stimulating conversation, storms, and rainy weather. Dislikes: Being around so many people, being touched in any way, by a person, unless she is very close with said person, talking to someone she just met, messy things, getting dirty, chocolate flavored things.

Personal Skill: Vigilante - Grants +20 Hit/Str/Crit if attacking a unit that has attacked another unit without a weapon equipped.

Affiliation: None (Recruitable in Birthright, Conquest, and Revelation. )

Roster: A traveling young woman without a set destination. Cold and distant, she is hard to befriend. If you gain her trust she will become a very loyal and trust worthy friend. Most likely to comfort others in distress. Born August 2nd.

History: Kari was born a high class Noble, her father was a leader of one of the higher up fractions from one of the many armies under King Garon, her father was a great Knight and her birth mother was a troubadour. They met in the army. Shortly after Kari’s birth, the mother was killed on the battle field. Her Father developed the habit to get Kari any and everything she could ever want; going above and beyond what she would ask for. He became doting and spoiled her. Though she didn’t like it, her father had her take many lessons, some consist of Piano, violin, dance, chess, singing, stiching and anything else that he felt a proper lady should know how to do. To try and make sure the loss of her mother didn’t affect her to much, he remarried. The woman had the wicked step mom Syndrome, she never wanted children. She would act innocent and kind in front of Kari’s father, but once he wasn’t there she would be mean and horrid. She was a pure Noble woman, both her parents came from money, she never worked a day in her life. She was a floozy and only looked for money in men. She cared more about her social status and looks above all else. She would never allowed Kari to call her “mother” or “mom” though she was in her life for many years. Kari was mainly raised by butlers and maids, due to the demanding hours of her fathers job. This caused her to say humble and kind. The maids and Butler’s tought her many life skills, such as cooking and proper cleaning techniques. she would often help them out with chorus, for fun. When she was still young, but old enough to take care of her self, her father died in battle. Leaving her with the step mom whom really didn’t want anything to do with her. One night, she slipped poison into Kari’s food, though an elderly maid whom took care of Kari since she was born stopped it from ever reaching her. Thus as punishment, the woman made the maid eat the food, losing the closest thing to a mother she had left. After Kari’s father passed, her step mom would bring home a different man every night. One night, the man she took home turned out to be a thief. Him and his small gange turned over the house killing all who lived there. With the help of some maids and Butler’s, Kari managed to stay hidden for a long time, but once he found her he tried to end her life. Though he failed, the man did however leave a large scar going down the left side of her face and partly her neck causing her to have nerve damage on most her face and lose eyesight in that eye. Once she was able to move around once more, she went to an old friend of her fathers. He managed to save her eye. Once he fixed her, and she was fully healed, she left. She now wonders around, she does what she needs to do to survive.

RECRUITMENT

Birthright Recruitment Recruited In: Chapter 12: Dark Reunion Recruitment: The Avatar must talk to her. Starting Class: Adventurer Starting Level: 16 Motivations for joining the Avatar: She wants to help end the war.

Conquest Recruitment Recruited In: Chapter 14: Voice of Paradise Recruitment: The Avatar must talk to her. Starting Class: Adventurer Starting Level: 16 Motivations for joining the Avatar: She wants to help end the War.

Revelation Recruitment Recruited In: Chapter 13: A lost Peace Recruitment: The Avatar must talk to her. Starting Class: Adventurer Starting Level: 16 Motivations for joining the Avatar: She wants to help end the war.

UNIT STATS

Asset: Speed Flaw: Resistance Skill(s): Point Blank, Luna, Resistance +2, Locktouch, Pass Weapon(s): Killer bow, Recover, Mend Class Sets: Adventurer                   Heart Seal > Maid

SUPPORTS

Romance Supports: Corrin (M), Jakob, Kaze, Saizo, Subaki, Silas, Xander, Azama, Hayato, Kaden, Hinata, Ryoma, Takumi, Arthur, Keaton, Odin, Leo, Laslow, Benny, Shura, Niles.

Other Supports: Corrin (F), Felicia, Rinkah, Orochi, Setsuna, Mozu, Oboro, Kagera, Nyx, Beruka, Peri, Charlotte, Selena, Asugi, Dwyer, Sigure, Sophie, Shiro, Kiragi, Selki, Mitama, Rhajat, Siegbert, Forrest, Ignatius, Velouria, Soleil, Nina.

Ideal (‘Canon’) Spouse: Keaton or Shura

QUOTES

Event Tile: “ Hum? What’s this? ” (item) “ No such thing as to much practice.. ” (exp) “ Hmm.. I feel I’m improving.. ” (weapon proficiency)

Level Up: “ Wow! I impress myself sometimes! ” (6+) “ There’s always room for improvement.  ” (4-5) “ Do I disappoint you? ” (2-3) “ Tch, that’s it?  ” (0-1) “ forgive me! ” (0-1, most skills capped)

Class Change: “ This is new.. ”

Support: “ I got your back! ” “ I’ll help you! ” “ don’t worry I got you! ” ” I’ll keep you safe! ” “ I’m here for you! ” “ Who’s the enemy here? Hehee kidding~” “ Don’t back down! ”

Attack Stance: “ Let me have a go! ” “ I’ll take a shot! ” “ My turn! ” “ Time to strike! ”

Guard Stance: “ Time and place! ” “ I thought I was the blind one! ” “ I won’t let them hurt you! ”

Critical / Skill: “ I have no mercy for scum like you. ” “ I’ll make you pay! ” “ I won’t hold back! ” “ I’ll shoot you down! ”

Defeated Enemy: “ On to the next. ” “ To easy. ” “ I suppose that was amusing. ”

Partner Defeated Enemy: “ Nice shot! ” “ I missed that do it again! ” “ killer shot! Hehe. ”

When Healed: “ This is a nice change of pace. ” “ Thanks! ” “ Who are you again? Kidding~”

Defeated by Enemy: “ I-I didn’t see you coming.. ”

Death Quote: “ This is it..  Mother.. Father.. I’ll.. See you Soon.. “

Retreat Quote: “ Ugh! It’s to blurry, I can’t tell who is who! I have to fall back! I don’t want to hurt an ally”

DLC Battle Quotes: Boo Camp “ You’re the monsters everyone’s talking about? You aren’t so scary.. I’ll show you true horror! ” Museum Melee “ Ooo ~ I see something shiny ~ that’s mine now hehee” Ghostly Gold “ Huh… Ghosts… Who would have though.. All well, time to die again~” Anna on the run “ I know my eyesight isn’t the best.. But I think I’m seeing double.. ”

Confession Quote: “ I don’t need my sight to see how much you mean to me. You have my heart now and forever…. (I hope you know what you’re getting in to. Hehee)”

MY CASTLE QUOTES

Castle Grounds Alone - ” Talk about a sugar rush! “ (surge) - ” I snuck in some training, I hope it paid off. “ (weapon proficiency) - ” This is NOT where this belongs, who left it here? “ (item) - ” What do you think will look good on me? “ (accessory)   - ” Wow! Thank you! “ (accessory given)   - ” So pretty! “ (accessory given)   - ” Is.. This a joke? “ (accessory given, not liked)   - ” Hehe thanks shall I try it on now? “ (Bath Towel given)   - ” Hehee thank you, this means a lot to me. “ (Friendship birthday present)   - ” Ahh hehee you know me so well ~ I love this so much! I’ll cherish it always. “ (Lover birthday present) - ” Hmm? Did you need something? “ (idle) - ” W-what? No I was not just dancing! “ (idle) - ” La laa la ~ W-whaa!! H-how long have you been there?! “ (idle) - ” Is someone there? Hehe ~ I’m kidding! I see you just fine. “ (idle) - ” Wow aren’t you cute ~ don’t I know you from somewhere? Hehe “ (idle, married) - “oh? A new face I see, let me know if you need anything. ” (visiting another castle)

Asking - Normal “ What has you so happy? Did something good happen? ” (happy) “ What do you think your future holds for you? ” (dreams) “ I’ll watch your backside- I mean back in the next battle, sound good? ” (team up) “ Indulge me in my curiosity… How do you spend your down time? ” (free time)

Replying - Normal “ I love the feeling I get when I finish cleaning. ” (happy) “ I hope to find true happiness one day. ” (dreams) “ Alright, no promises I won’t mistake you for the enemy ~ I’m kidding,  I’m kidding! ” (team up) “ I often walk beyond the camp boarders, or wonder around the forest. ” (free time)

Private Quarters Friendship “ You called me for something? ” (invite) “ I baked some cookies, want one? No I didn’t put salt instead of sugar in them this time. ” (invite) “ Hehee now this will be fun ~ ” (invite, MU is married)

Lovers “ Hey! I finished cleaning up, don’t mess it up. ” (greeting) “ I missed you! Don’t leave me again.. ” (greeting) “ I-I’ve been practicing my violin.. Would you mind listening? ” (greeting) “ Hehee that’s the best sight to wake up to. ” (awakening, good) “ Do that again and you will regret it.. ” (awakening, bad) “ My hair is such a pain to dry.. ” (greeting, cool down) “ Hehee thanks that felt nice ~ your turn now ~ ” (cooling down successful) “ Oh my! How beautiful! Thank you! ” (flowers)

Bonding “ If that’s all you need, mind if I go? ” (friendship bonding) “ It was a pleasure spending this time with you. Invite me again some time. ” (friendship bonding) “ I’m glad we can spend this time together..   These are the happiest moments of my day. ” (lover bonding) “ I just want to hold you in my arms and never let go.. Promise you won’t leave me.. ” (lover bonding) “ Come here for a moment, Hehee I’m not going to bit you… (See, I told you I wouldn’t bite you, This time. Hehe) ” (kiss)

Extras/little quirks: She won’t dule someone unless there is a wager of some sort; even if she manages to win she will let the other party have their winnings as well. After her father passed away she continues to practice all the things he wanted her to learn when ever she can. Typically after doing one of them she would cry a little and say softly to her self,  “are you proud papa? ” or “am I improving father? ” she can be fairly vain when it comes to her hair, she takes pride in its soft silky texture. When she’s in deep thought she will twirl the ends of her hair. Because of the damage to her left side of her face, she can no longer produce tears from that eye. The left eye is also significantly lighter in color, and has a small thin line down it from where it was cut. Though she hates chocolate flavored things she loves normal chocolate. If she eats anything remotely spicy she turns red and gets sick, if it’s really spicy she will pass out. She is very flexible and uses it to an advantage in hand to hand fighting.

[anodyne-sunflower]

NewtxPrincess!Reader smut request

As promised (although late lol) here it is! Can be read in conjunction with my other princess works, as they take place in the same story.

Others can be found here

**********

“Let the King know I’m resting. And I don’t want to be disturbed.” You stood cautiously by the large double doors of your chambers, hand holding the knocker as the servant nodded quickly and ran off down the marbled halls. You just wanted some form of solitude, everyday life just seemed to be getting more tiring, and your new husband wasn’t much help. All this time you believed it was the right thing to do, to marry this stranger because your father deemed this match necessary.

But, now your father had passed, and what was left of his reign was merely in your own blood. Your husband was now the King of this entire valley, stretching far along passed the blue hills. And you, his Queen. If it wasn’t for the safety of your subjects, you’d of ran off long ago.

“King Grindelwald…” It left your mouth with a hint of disdain, and you shut the door as you strolled towards your folding screens to change. You wanted nothing more than to sleep, to forget the daily struggles of your reign and to pretend that you were back in his arms instead.

You undid the pin in your hair, your silky locks falling messily around your shoulders. The white dress you had on was tiring to get out of, and you inched your fingers back to untie the laces but you couldn’t quite reach. “Oh, I shouldn’t have sent that servant away.” You mumbled, fighting with the outfit, and just as you were about to give up his voice carried along the walls of your chambers.

“It seems my lady is in need of assistance.”

You jumped back when he spoke, and you turned swiftly to see your ex-manservant leaning against the post of your bed. He wore that same smile he always did, the same one that captured your heart years ago.

“Newt.”

He pushed off the post, coming up next to you as he placed his hands gently on your shoulders. He turned you around, his eyes trailing to the laces of your dress. “May I?”

It wasn’t proper, of that you were sure, but having him so close once again, after weeks apart it just…made you feel alive once more. Ever since you were married off to Grindelwald, he ordered you new servants, obviously having seen some sort of connection between you and Newt. Neither of you were happy about it, and even though your heart belonged to Newt you played the role of the dutiful wife.

You dropped your hands to your sides, allowing him to untie your dress.

“Why are you here?”

Newt sighed deeply, his fingers working at the stubborn laces as he spoke. “Is it so wrong that I should come see you?”

“No-no…I just-” But, the words were lost on you, because in truth you’ve been wanting to see him for so long. Yet, you knew the effects this relationship had on you. It was a dangerous game to play, to even have him in here right now. The passions you felt for him were unbearable, and you couldn’t possibly erase years of the nights you both shared together from memory.

“Do you think I’ve come to steal you away, your highness?” Newt chuckled, finally freeing the strings from the back of your dress. But, he didn’t drop his hands, at least not one of them. He had it raised up, still hovering over the opening in your dress he had just made. How long had it been since he’s touched you? Since he’s heard his name slip passed those perfect lips of yours? He knew coming here was a terrible idea, and it was not only foolish on his part but extremely dangerous. If the king, or even a servant caught wind of this he was sure he’d be hanged before the nights end.

But, he couldn’t help himself anymore. He knew it was his idea to push you into Grindelwald’s arms, knew it was his fault you were currently inaccessible to him. At the time though, it seemed only the best course of action to take. Because, you needed to be queen, and he knew you’d be the greatest one this kingdom had seen in centuries. Now though, he regretted it, even if it was a selfish reason.

“Steal me away?” You laughed at his mock of a warning, but there was no humor in this situation. If he didn’t leave now then you couldn’t promise his life would be saved. “Newt you must-”

Your words stopped, breath caught in your throat as his fingertips trailed up the bare skin of your back. It was like fire had touched you, and you wanted to run away from it but also just embrace the heat of the touch. He didn’t stop, he just focused on the soft expanse of your flesh as he ran his hand up, fingers tracing over the dip of your spine. There was no turning back now, he knew that. You knew that.

“Y/N…” He whispered out your name, conveying his want and love for you all in one word. And it frightened you, because you couldn’t bare the thought of losing him and if he didn’t go soon you were afraid that would be the end result.

“I am your Queen! You will address me as such.”

It was harsh, but you needed him to leave. For both your sakes. This wasn’t a torrid affair anymore, it was adultery and if anyone heard of this your reputation would be compromised. Newt, however, wasn’t so bothered by the insulting tone. He smiled down at you, bringing his hands up to remove the crown from your head.

“What is a queen without her crown?”

“This isn’t a game, Newt. We are no longer hiding behind my father’s back! This is my husband, the king and I his-”

But, Newt just cut you off, his hands cupping your cheeks as he leaned down and captured your lips in a passionate kiss. You wanted to fight back, you really did but his kiss was something you had been longing for, aching for.

His hand slid down to your neck, holding it gently as he tilted his head, moving his mouth softly against yours. In this moment he didn’t care if the King himself waltz into the room, feeling your lips on his was worth the gallows.

He pulled away, eyes filled with desire as he looked down at you. Your hands were bundled into his waist coat, gripping the clasps of it tightly in your turmoil. Both your breaths were labored, and the lip coloring you wore was more than likely a smeared mess on your face. Newt lifted your chin, thumb running across your bottom lip. His eyes trailed up your features until he met your own, and the look you had pooling in them undid him completely.

He wrapped an arm around your waist, throwing you on the four post bed, and climbing atop you. His lips crashed down on yours, and worked at the dress you wore. He tore the sleeves down, leaving you in just your corset that pushed your breasts up so beautifully he could admire the view all day.

“Newt…” You threw your head back into the silk covers, the feeling of his lips kissing every patch of exposed skin making you shiver. He worked his way down, kissing the tops of your breasts before lifting the bottom of your dress and petticoat. He bundled them around your hips, kneeling down before you and taking your clit into his mouth. His green eyes stared up at you, not wanting to miss the way your mouth hung open in pleasure, or how you shut your eyes tightly to fight against the building heat inside of you.

“Ahh-” The feeling of his tongue swirling around you was maddening, but you had gone so long without the proper touch of a man. Your husband was no joy in bed, not that you wanted to bed him to begin with. The only thing that made it tolerable was thinking of Newt, and all those times you shared a bed together before your coronation. If only you could go back…

He parted your lower lips, his hot tongue lapping up your wetness and groaning at the taste. He delved the tip of his tongue in, gripping the ends of your dress as he held you firmly in place.

“Unh my…my love…” Your fingers covered your mouth slightly, trying to soften the sound of your voice as you called out to your ex lover. But, the pleasure was building and if he continued flicking his tongue like that you would be a screaming mess of moans and curses.

Newt sucked at your clit, his breathing becoming heavy, and you could feel the hot brush of air that escaped him when he released your need with a loud pop. He glanced up at you, eyes heavy lidded as he spoke with purpose.

“Does he make you feel this way? Can he possibly know how much you enjoy when I do these things to you?”

He wasn’t sure why he said it, but he had to know. The idea of you wrapped in the arms of the very man he despised was infuriating. He needed to know that only he could cause you such pleasure, that only he could make you cry out his name in the heat of the moment. And for his name to be the only thing that comes to mind when your husband bedded you.

“No…no, Merlin’s beard, Newt. He can’t.”

As you begged him to continue, he removed his clothing, leaving himself in just his trousers as he kneeled back down to your wet center. He leaned forward, breath ghosting over your sensitive need and making you tremble. He unbuttoned his pants, pulling them down enough for him to release his aching cock. He gripped himself in his hand, stroking along his length as he went back to pleasing you.

“Does he know how much you like this?”

Newt kissed the tip of your clit, eyes never leaving your face as he continued down.

“Or perhaps, when I do this.”

He sucked you completely into his mouth, only parting his lips to allow his tongue to lick from your entrance up to your reddening clit. You were whimpering out, squirming under his touch as he continued to assault you with his jealousy. You wanted to tell him no one, not even a King could possibly make you feel the way he did, and nothing in this world would ever change the love you had for him. But, the words just got caught in your throat and all you could manage was a soft moan, incoherently purring out his name as he growled into you.

“Bloody hell…” He had to stop for a second, his cheek resting against your thigh as he pumped his erection. He was hard, maddeningly so, and all he wanted was the relief of feeling you around him once again.

“My love…” He kissed your thigh, leaving a hot trail along your leg until he worked his way back up. He didn’t have to say it, you knew what he needed, because you wanted the same thing.

You spread your legs wider, grabbing your dress and lifting it higher as he settled himself between your legs. His cock rubbed against your folds, coating it in your wetness as he seductively cooed out your name.

“Y/N…I love you.” He grunted into your neck, finally sinking himself into you as you clawed at his back. Your nails dug into his skin, chin resting atop his shoulder as he buried himself completely into you.

“I-” Your addled brain couldn’t quite get the words out, the desire you felt was making you utterly dizzy and all you could do was moan into his ear. But, he seemed to understand because he turned his head, pushing your sweaty foreheads together as he thrust forward.

“Never leave me…” He whispered out, fingers tangling into the bedsheets as he rocked his hips into you. “Let me be by your side forever.”

If this was your logical side speaking, you’d tell him it wasn’t possible. That you both couldn’t keep this up, but logic was no longer a concern. You just wanted this man so desperately and nothing would take this from you.

He snapped his hips forward, gasping when your walls clenched around him, and you laced your fingers into his hair pulling him down to your lips.

“I am yours, Newt.” You sensually spoke, meeting his eyes as you kissed him deeply. Whether that would remain true was a mystery, but right now in this moment you were endlessly his.

Newt pulled away, his lips lingering above yours, practically breathing each other’s air as he pushed forward. The sound of skin hitting skin filled the chambers, and Newt caressed your thigh as he brought his hand down, thumb rubbing your clit as he quickened his pace.

His affections were making you writhe beneath him, and you lifted your back off the bed as your orgasm began to approach. You rolled your hips down into his hand, trying to set the perfect rhythm. But, he already had you there, his length slammed into you, fingers rubbing down on your need as he helped you ride out the waves of your climax. Your inner walls twitched and convulsed around his length, and you entwined your legs around his lean waist keeping him trapped there as you cried out.

“Newt! Ah…” Your moans were swallowed by his lips, and he massaged your tongues together as you squirmed against him. His hips still worked quickly, pace beginning to falter as he growled and grunted above you. He didn’t want this to end, but the heat of you wrapped around him was too much to take. He pulled his hips down harder, watching as his cock disappeared into you one last time as he came.

Warmth filled you, and you let slip a soft gasp as his seed spread inside of you. You caressed the skin of his chest, sighing when he loosened your legs around him and slipped out of you his cum dripping out of your entrance just a bit. He admired the sight for only a second before his weight fell on top of you in exhaustion. He was spent, but he wanted nothing more than to spend the entire night taking over and over again until his very name became a mantra on your lips.

Your legs dangled lazily around him, fingers walking along the sweat slicked skin of his back. How you’ve missed this, just basking in the afterglow of your lovemaking. Newt was everything you’ve ever wanted, and knowing he was out of reach for you as well was painful.

“Newt-”

“Shh…” He smiled into your neck, giving you a quick peck on the pulse of your throat as he groaned out. “Your mine, my lady. Always will be.”

“Is that what you believe?”

“Shall I prove it again?”

You giggled at his teasing, pinching him gently as you pushed him off of you. He rolled to the side, whining a bit at the loss of contact.

“You’re leaving me already?”

You removed the rest of your clothing, throwing your petticoat over his head as you looked over your shoulder.

“Draw me a bath.”

Newt removed the offending item, grinning at you. “I’m no longer your servant, my lady.”

“Oh…well, I was going to ask you to join me, but-”

He tutted at you, swinging his legs off the bed as placed his boots back on.

“Have you always been this manipulative?”

“I’m Queen, Newt. Sometimes it comes with the role.”

He chuckled at that, his arm coming to wound around your waist and bringing you close to him.

“And what would your husband think of this…?”

The mention of the King made you stiffen, and if not for Newt peppering kisses along your shoulder you would’ve been a bit frustrated with the subject. But, instead you opted to just enjoy this for now, and cross the other bridge when it came to it.

“Never mind what he thinks.”

Newt eyed you cautiously, unsure if you meant that, but your smile was enough to make him return the gesture. He pulled away from you, bowing as he spoke.

“Your highness, I’ll have that bath ready for you in a minute.”

*****

Hope ya liked! Loved writing this ❤️