#again: worst job of my life but definitely the most interesting

[beldcm]

Charlotte's words made sense. Tatum had seen it firsthand while working for the brunette. Lies were so easily spread about the actress; rumours came out of nowhere, and people simply filled in the gaps when it came to parts of her life that weren't public. There was no escaping it. All Charlotte could do was ignore it and simply carry on with her life. Tatum figured that that was easier said than done—it always was. Before accepting the job offer, Tatum hadn't really taken much interest in Hollywood. The rich and famous wasn't a crowd they saw themselves mingling in. That, of course, changed quickly; they were essentially paid to do it. After seeing how Charlotte was treated, especially by her so-called fans, Tatum had a newfound respect for those in show business. 

"That's exactly what I'm doing," Tatum kept up the light-hearted banter. It was nice to see Charlotte relax. Tatum couldn't help but feel a sense of smugness; they hadn't seen Charlotte this calm and herself in a long time. There was no façade or false persona she needed to put on here. Tatum had seen the brunette at her worst, but God, was she captivating at her best. "Just next to all your appointments, I make sure to draw tiny little stick figures or short people accommodations that they will have to make. The best thing is, now that you know, it's not like you can reach to take the diary off of me." Most people wouldn't dare to tease their boss in this manner, and usually Tatum kept their comments tame. But there was something about this setting that changed the dynamic, at least for Tatum. Even though they weren't actually in a romantic relationship, somehow the pretending was starting to blur the professional lines.

"What?!" Tatum piped up in a playfully dramatic tone. "My services are great, thank you. In fact, they are the best, the talk of the town. I've never had any complaints about my services; you've just not experienced them properly." There had been an intentional, flirtatious hidden meaning behind their words. Now that they had been put out into the world, Tatum quickly hoped that Charlotte wouldn't catch on. Tatum shifted a little, arms awkwardly folding across their chest. They had allowed things to get a little too relaxed. At least Tatum could play it off as method acting; they wouldn't be acting like the assistant/boss if they were actually engaged.

"Of course you deserve it; everybody does." While Tatum wasn't a 'love at first sight' kind of person, they definitely believed in true love. There were people out there made for you; it was just, unfortunately, some went their entire lives without finding them. Tatum was picky. There was always something wrong with the person they dated, giving them the excuse to cut ties. There's no point in settling and being unhappy, they would say as friends would roll their eyes. Tatum figured that Charlotte had very different reasonings to be put off when it came to dating. "There's someone perfect out there for you, someone who can easily handle all the glitz and glamour of the rich and famous. Right now, that person is me, at least that's what we need people to believe." A part of Tatum felt a quick spark of both jealousy and protectiveness at the thought of Charlotte dating. Tatum immediately shut the lid on that thought, pushing it back to the dark depths of their brain to never see daylight again. 

"We can do that, but nothing flashy, not in this town. We can just host something small in the barn. All my family and friends will care about is if there's alcohol involved." The people in Tatum's life were simple with simple pleasures. Box wine and cheap beer were enough for them all to have a great night that went deep into the early hours. 

As Charlotte accepted the offer of drinks that evening, Tatum adjusted their posture, straightening their back. A genuine smile plastered over their face, "the difference is while this town isn't cute, you're not boring." There had been a compliment there that Tatum hoped Charlotte would catch on to. "You really don't want to know what I got up to as a teenager. We have to leave some things as a mystery in our relationship. Now, get ready because I'm taking you out." Tatum moved towards the closet, pulling out some clothes before they left the room. Leaving Charlotte alone to get ready in private.

After showering in the main bathroom and changing into a simple pair of pants and a casual shirt, Tatum was ready. Tatum headed downstairs, waiting for Charlotte so they could leave.

tatum's question took charlotte a little by surprise — no-one had asked her that before, how having her personal information out for the world to see was something she was use to. she shook her head, "not at all. i feel like people too easily build up this image and idea of me in their heads by what they read and what they see. i think they forget that i'm just a person too." it ran far deeper than just that but she didn't want to bore tatum with her personal insecurities and as easy as talking with them felt, this was still a professional working relationship. when she had set out to follow in the footsteps of her mother, fame was the last thing she had expected. it had all been quite the whirlwind for her and she was just along for the ride. at the end of the day, she loved what she did, interacting with audiences, discussing important topics and being able to be a positive influence on others.

with news of her engagement, came the news of her sexuality, something she'd kept hidden to anyone outside her inner circle but if she was to get married, even if for a visa, she didn't want to lie about that. as expected the reactions among older viewers had been mixed but at the same time, had never felt more supported by her community. she admired tatum for the way they handled being thrust into the spotlight and the tabloids knowing they were being spoken about. charlotte knew that there wasn't anyone more capable than tatum and they proved that over and over. playfully rolling her eyes, she laughed at them, "i knew it wasn't notes that you were writing down in your diary — it's filled with comments and jokes about my height but that's okay because i'm good at this game. you tall people don't scare me." in fact, it was quite the opposite and there was no denying that she hadn't taken notice of their height difference. there were a lot of things that charlie was starting to take notice of when it came to tatum but that was not something she was wanting to admit. the banter was fun and it was nice to be able to let herself enjoy conversing with her assistant the way she was.

"i'd be willing to negotiate if you were able to prove that your services are worth paying double for. i can't just be handing out that kind of money." charlotte did her best to keep a straight face before a dimpled smile broke out over her features as she looked over at them, "i was hoping to make a good impression, i don't know if avoiding eye contact will help me accomplish that." even though she was teasing, there was truth in her words. of course she wanted to make an impression on the woman, it was just who she was naturally and this unique situation didn't change that.

"it sounds like maybe you are the one that needed security." tatum's words about dating resonated so deeply with charlie, knowing all too well how much easier it was just not to date. to instead focus on her career. it had been hard for her to trust people's intentions, work out whether or not they were genuinely interested in who she was and not just who she was to the nation. "i agree, it is easier, it's so hard to find genuine people who want to put in the effort. i know my situation isn't exactly ideal for people but that doesn't mean i don't deserve to find happiness." charlotte's words had trailed off by the end of what she had to say, shrugging, her body becoming noticeably softer speaking of love. she was a hopeless romantic at heart, a part of her that she protected from the disappointment of being let down which felt like a shame knowing how much love she had to give someone.

at the mention of tatum's friends, charlotte perked up, a smile growing on her lips once more, "we could always throw an engagement celebration, they would be more than welcome to come along, i'd love to meet them, hear all of your embarrassing stories seeing as i can't look at your mother in the eye." buying her own engagement ring felt so wrong, an unnecessarily weight on her finger. she made sure that it was nothing like what she would actually want but big enough to seem believable, to be noticed by paps. she toyed with the ring as she listened to tatum's suggestion to go out causing her to smile as it hadn't been a suggestion she'd expected, an opportunity to let her hair down and maybe genuinely enjoy herself. "i'd really like that, tatum. small and boring can be cute, i mean look at me," she teased playfully, "i'm sure you had your fair share of fun here as a teenager and i'm sure we can find our own."

[mrs-elijah-wood]

Also today I was reminded of one of the most embarrassing encounters I had while working as a receptionist at a used car lot:

I passed one of the salesmen on the showfloor and he went “Staying busy?” and my brain short-circuited—so I looked straight at this man and replied “Busy staying!”

[akutasoda]

the fans are always right. right?

synopsis - mr reca seemed a bit more downbeat then your used too, maybe some rather interesting reviews would cheer him up

includes - reca

warnings - gn!reader, fluff, slight crack, wc - 1.6k

a/n: i uhh had an idea... lost it and tried to salvage what i remembered and this was the result- anyway all the reviews used were given to me by some lovely people ( @tragedy-of-commons, @singularity-sam, @vxnuslogy, @mikashisus, @/milksnake-tea, @/tetrachrxmacy and @theother-victoria) try and guess who's who :))

a huffed sigh escaped you, slouching down in your chair as the clock ticked rhythmically in the background. mr reca was supposed to meet you around fifteen minutes ago. he'd never been late before.

a reasonable explanation would be that he had something more important to tend to. and that would be understandable. but for now you were bored out of mind and leaving wasn't an option as reca could show up at any time - he probably wouldn't be as forgiving if you were to show up after him.

today you two were meant to develop a new script and start on the storyboard for his latest idea. in honesty, you're still not quite sure how you landed this job. you wanted to start getting into directing films of your own but couldn't quite place how to start and so you settled for finding a job as a co-director.

after helping co-direct a few pieces here and there, you got a message from the esteemed mr reca. you had to do a couple (maybe even hundreds…) of checks to make sure you weren't actually dreaming. mr reca didn't exactly strike you as the kind of person to need or even want a co-director.

and yet here you were. apparently he enjoyed the sense of style you breathed into the films you helped direct and thought it would pair nicely with a couple of his. even to this day you find it hard to believe that you still had this job.

but you put your all into it. a lot of trust and expectation was placed upon you and you would be sure to not let him down. even if that meant waiting for him to show up for your appointed meetings.

twenty minutes.

you looked around the room for anything to pass the time, all you could think of was your phone laid idly on the desk. then an idea crossed your mind. reca had recently released a film. perhaps you could read some reviews to pass the time.

you never really expected yourself to be mentioned in any of them. yes you got credits and the recognition for being reca's personally selected co-director but most people still only talked about him in their reviews, which wasn't exactly a problem.

it didn't take long to find a rather reputable review page and so you began scrolling.

you should've expected the first one being a five star review

@bebe_fanpage101 : ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

- "This film has changed my life. My whole outlook on everything that exists in this world, in fact even in the entire universe. I can never look at anything I know the same way ever again. This film represents emotions most humans could never comprehend. But I can. Thanks to this film I have been awakened to many things previously thought unimaginable. Thank you."

a rather extreme opinion in your eyes, reca did have some “over-the-top” fans. your became intrigued after stumbling across a one star review soon after

@frankenweeniehater4life : ⭐

- "what ?"

[review has been deleted]

maybe it wasn't an actual review, but you stifle a laugh at the next review being from the same person

⭐

- "wrong movie how do i delete a review" (Edited)

perhaps this could definitely entertain you until reca arrived. you idly scrolled through the reviews, only stopping when some peaked your interest or made you smile

@seas_ablaze : ⭐⭐⭐

- "A film that does a lot of monkey business and goes bananas with it."

or alternatively,

@frankenweeniehater4life : ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

- "i've seen about a million movies and dear god this has to be one of the worst. an absolute slog to get through. the pacing was awful, everything took years to happen. the soundtrack was grating. the actors either put no effort in or way too much- either put them back on the street or send them back to the musical theater. the cinematography was dull at best and straight up nauseating at worst- i had to pause multiple times so i didn't get physically ill. and don't get me STARTED on the stilted script and dull characterization. and the dog isn't even a weenie."

you reckon they might have gotten the wrong film again… but it definitely explained the username-

and at that moment reca finally showed up, he pushed open the doors grumbling something - obviously whatever kept him busy wasn't pleasant. he had walked in with a huff and his expression didn't exactly read that of happiness.

you brushed it off and greeted him like you usually would, something that was greeted with another grumble which you could only guess was a hello of sorts towards you.

watching, you noted how he slumped into the chair on the other side of the desk and it became clear that he wasn't in the mood to get any work done. the silence was starting to get uncomfortable and so you slid your phone over to him, reviews still open.

reca perked one eyebrow up and questioned you “what's this about? we have duties to complete not waste time”

you hummed in response before sliding your phone closer until he picked it up “it's reviews from your latest film, it's not like we'll be getting things done soon and maybe they could help guide our planning” a small pause “they're quite entertaining”

he scrolled for a bit before stopping on one and reading it out loud

@/blink!vxnus! : ⭐⭐⭐⭐

- "film was great and very informative. it made the story far more interesting compared to other documentaries tackling the same story. - 1 because mr reca wasn't in the actual film"

“it's not very helpful, just compliments” he sighed “and wishful fans being normal”

you smiled in response before reaching over as he turned the phone to you and scrolling back up again “this one's a personal favorite, especially the comments”

@/bebe_fanpage101 : ⭐⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

- "came for the reca shirtless scene, stayed for the storytelling. no regrets stan robin"

- @/ultimate_recakisser : "I mean I’d be the same as well I MEAN WHAT WHO SAID THAT Speakingofshirtlessrecaifoujdthisonefanartdoesanyonewantmetosendit?"

- @/bebe_fanpage101 : "me. dms. shhh."

- @/iwishsundaywasmywife : "id judge u both. but. im the same way abt bird man so i cant"

reca stared at the review, then the comments, before his face began morphing into something akin to the middle point of shock and disgust.

he sighed “there wasn't even a shirtless scene, these people are… enthusiastic, to be nice”

you hummed in response before suggesting that the lower rated reviews may help more and scrolled until you found some.

@/iwishsundaywasmywife : ⭐

- "Great movie. Plot flows well, characters are charismatic and overall a wonderful viewing experience. Just hate the director."

@/abardslyre : ⭐

- "my gf broke up with me for the director. mr reca count ur ******* days."

you had to hold back laughter at the sight of his face distorting into confusion and a slight grimace making the corner of his lips scowl

@/seas_ablaze : ⭐

- "This is awful, pretentious garbage. In all objective fact, he's an auteur wannabe who makes idiotic movies for the normie audiences who are too stupid to think for themselves. I didn't even watch more than five minutes of it, I just know it's bad from his name attached to it. I never made a movie before or have ever taken a film class, but even I could do better than this disgrace of an art form that only a few can ever hope to master. Hell, I would personally kill all subpar directors myself if I could, I'm just that smart. As Lord Scorsese says: Cinema is dead!"

mr reca sighed, deeply, “i can't decide if this helped or not, but im leaning no at the minute”

you definitely could say you enjoyed scrolling through the reviews more, but it wasn't hard to notice how his demeanor changed. how he wasn't so grumpy and you could've sworn that at one point you'd seen a smile on his face. your idea worked.

eventually you two managed to start discussing ideas - which was more him talking your ear off with his ideas and you listening and writing down anything he told you to. and then he paused.

before you even had the chance to question if anything was the matter, reca surprised you “maybe those reviews could help for the next film”

“what do you mean?” you couldn't believe what you were hearing, your spur of the moment idea to show him reviews to hopefully boost his mood so you could both actually talk about his next film properly worked. it actually gave him ideas.

reca prattled on about how some of the reviews gave him the idea for how to expand his latest idea that had hit a wall and now he could continue to elaborate the idea. it was sort of satisfying to see how passionate he had become despite his earlier attitude.

he then abruptly stopped before trailing off “maybe i should listen to some of those reviews and change genres”

you thought that was a rather drastic suggestion, arguing that his current genres worked perfectly fine and it was his speciality, his signature if you would. but then he started mumbling again

“maybe if we went that route… then you could…” he was trailing off, you could barely piece together his coherent sentence but you could pick up on “based on us”

“what? could you repeat that again mr reca?”

“what?”

mr reca was never easy to work with.

taglist - @little-miss-chaoss, @frankiesteinn, @https-sourlimes

[ayyy-pee]

Discord 18+ - Twitter - Masterlist

Pairing: Nanami Kento x Female Reader

Story Summary: Following his mothers passing, Nanami inherits his family's rundown bakery. With the bakery on its last leg, Nanami reluctantly takes on the task of trying to save what his family has worked to keep for decades, but he can't do it alone.

Genre: Bakery/Coffee Shop AU

Warnings: Workaholic meanie Nanami, employee x boss relationship, but also enemies to lovers, death, grief/mourning, profanity, jealousy, fluff, angst, Nanami owns a bakery, parental loss, Nanami is bad at feelings, I don’t know if I’ll do smut for this one but sexual tension, mutual pining, Nanami is sort of an asshole here

Art by: Ilameys + (Unknown artist (right pic). I'd love to credit the artist so if you know who it is, please let me know!)

Chapter 2 - Wienerbrød

Chapter Summary: You try to bake something new!

You kick your shoes off as you enter your apartment. With your phone wedged between your ear and your shoulder, you groan in irritation as you storm into your living room.

“I’m telling you, Shoko. This guy is such a fucking asshole. Shut me down the second I asked him a simple question,” you’re ranting as you flop down onto your couch. “He’s got to be the most pessimistic person I’ve ever met. He did nothing but pick apart the entire bakery and tell me how shitty it was, tried to establish some strange dominance thing in the kitchen after offering me the job… the kitchen,” you stress dramatically, wavering your arms as if Shoko can see you. “My domain! Can you believe him? He doesn’t give a shit about the actual bakery. He’s a total businessman type. Stiff, boring as hell and a dick. I don’t know why I said yes to the position. I’m going to hate my life.”

You exhale sharply once you’ve finished your tirade. On the other end of the line, you hear your friend inhale deeply. You didn’t have to ask to know she was sucking on a cigarette, likely almost finished with it and prepping her second, maybe third. After a short beat of silence, you hear her exhale. “Hmm, is he hot at least?”

“Extremely,” you admit through gritted teeth, rubbing away the tension quickly forming between your brows. “That’s the worst part.”

You hate to think it, you loathe to admit it, but Nanami was so very fucking attractive, like stupid hot and it pissed you off! Those thick arms practically bulging through his dress shirt, those veins that exposed themselves and ran enticingly along his forearms when he rolled his sleeves up. His chiseled features, those sharp cheekbones, even his frown was attractive. And god, you didn’t even want to think about his waist. 

Anyone with eyes could see Nanami Kento was an insanely beautiful man, modelesque even. But it only served to piss you off more. His constant gloomy attitude was so off-putting, it almost took away from his beauty, like a rain cloud threatening to cover a blue sky.

“Anyway,” you sigh, putting a stop to your own thoughts as you stare up at the ceiling.  “That’s beside the point, Shoko. He’s an asshole, but it’s obvious he needs help to get his bakery up and running. I think it’s family owned. He told me that he grew up in the bakery. Seemed miserable about it, though.”

“Interesting,” Shoko manages, though she sounds rather disinterested. “Well if he had to pick anyone, he definitely hired the best person for the job. You’re annoyingly positive.”

“Okay, rude.”

“I just mean you’ll balance his negativity well. Just try not to let him walk all over you. You’ve worked with plenty of dickheads before. What’s one more?”

You hum, your mind already accepting your fate. “I guess you’re right.”

“You know I am. The guy clearly needs help and you love this kind of thing - taking something old, miserable and rundown and making it loveable again.”

You hum again, listening as Shoko blows out another breath of smoke. “And who knows? Maybe you’ll do the same for the bakery, too.”

“Right. Wait– what?”

“I gotta go. I’ll call you later.” She says, voice light with humor. The line goes dead and you roll your eyes at your friends comments as you let the day's events wash over you. Nanami said he wanted to sample some of your desserts on Monday and see some new recipes. You can do that.

The moment you’d stepped into the bakery’s kitchen, your mind raced with possibilities. You felt at home there. The kitchen felt like it had been loved, like it was properly used and cared for, albeit old and a little rundown. That was okay. It gave the kitchen personality and you loved that. You wanted to continue giving the kitchen the love it deserved.

Nanami told you he’d grown up in that kitchen, but he truly seemed to hate even being in the building. You tried to picture a chubby little blonde boy with his arms crossed and a scowl etched across his face standing in the kitchen covered in flour and icing. Adorable, but definitely not the man you’d met today. You wondered how it came to be that he now owned this bakery when he seemed to despise it.

And you wondered if there was a way to get him to learn to love it again.

You shake your head, pushing the thought away. It wasn’t your job to turn his frown upside down, so to speak. It was your job to make sure the bakery was successful as it’s Head Baker and that’s what you intended to do.

- - - - - -

The weekend came and went just as quickly and now you find yourself standing in the kitchen of the bakery with Nanami as the sun barely begins to rise over the city. You pile your notebooks onto the large metal table in the center of the room. Nanami reaches over, taking the notebook sitting atop the stack.

“Are these your recipes?” He asks, flipping through the pages.

“Yep. These are some pastries I created on a whim. I was thinking we could go through and select what you like, maybe tweak some so that they fit more of the vibe you’re going for with the bakery. Or are there any pastries you’d like to keep from the previous owner?” 

Nanami’s dark eyes shoot up from the notebook to look at you. You hold his gaze, trying to find anything behind those eyes aside from the clear hatred he holds for this bakery, but you don’t. It’s frustrating.

“No,” is all he says.

“Okay…well, we can start from scratch then. Let me know what you see that you may like.”

Nanami replies with something between a grunt and a hum. “I’ll review a few of these and will follow up. If you want to get comfortable and organize the kitchen to your liking, go ahead. Please try and have a sample pastry ready within the next few hours.”

He turns to go into his office without so much as a look back.

You sigh, trying to get used to this silence you were sure you’d be working in everyday whether Mr. Nanami was there or not. You couldn’t wait to establish a menu so you could bring staff on. At least then you wouldn’t feel so alone.

You wander through the kitchen with a notepad, looking through all of the smallwares and jotting down what you see in case you need to place an order. There seems to be many of the supplies you need here already and in good condition - spatulas, mixing bowls, flour sifters, icing tips. The bakeware also seems to be well supplied with an array of bread pans, muffin tins and cake pans. This place was fully stocked as far as you could tell. 

You shuffle over to where three mixer appliances sit on a counter against the wall, setting your notepad down to inspect them. They’re a little older, but they turn on and mix just fine. You’d bet they mixed better than some of the newer models. You decide you’ll keep them.

As you lean one of the mixers over to check its condition, you find a small booklet lying underneath the stand. You pick it up, gently setting the mixer back down before you open it to inspect it. It’s a tiny black leatherbound journal with very faded gold lettering in a language you definitely don’t know.

And you? Well, you’re nosey as hell, so you carefully peel back the cover, taking in the elegant writing etched onto the first page.

To my baby boy

There’s some strange writing scrawled beneath this in what looks like English letters. You can’t really tell, but it seems to be some message in whatever language this is. You turn a couple of pages and let your eyes roam over what’s written within. The rest of the pages you can read fairly easily as they’re in English. You can see immediately that these are recipes. The booklet is full of pastry dishes, both sweet and savory. They appear to be foreign pastries and you feel your heart race with excitement as you imagine making them because while you were adventurous with your baking, you’re positive you haven’t tried to make any of these. 

And Nanami did want to sample your baking, so why not give him something he’s not going to see in your portfolio?

Eagerly, you begin moving through the rest of the kitchen equipment, taking out what you need to begin.

- - - - - -

The kitchen is full with the smell of fresh dough baking. The quiet hum of the ovens working calms you as you sift through the recipe in the booklet you’d found earlier. You decided to make one of your original creations while also trying your hand at this new mystery pastry in case Mr. Nanami liked both…or one…or none. Shit, you didn’t want to imagine him not liking either.

You stare down at the ingredients already in the mixing machines.

“Alright. So, water, 2 large eggs, a teaspoon of salt, unsalted butter, active dry yeast…” You read through the remaining list of ingredients until you reach the end. “And now…flour?” You squint down at the notebook, the words scribbled messily on the paper, time having faded the ink. You can’t really make out the measurements written out. It looks like 2 ½ cups. You’ll try it and hey, if it doesn’t work, you’ll simply adjust the recipe to find the right mix. Easy.

Just as you’re sorting through the measuring cups, Nanami emerges from his office with your journals, mouth set in its usual hard line as he makes his way to you. He sets the books down, and you swear you see him inhale the sweet scent of the pastries currently baking in the oven before softly exhaling. You open your mouth to say something before quickly shutting it because he’s back to business in about .02 seconds. You really can’t read this guy, so you don’t try to. You redirect your focus back on to your task.

“These look good,” he tells you, his finger tapping on the book stacked on top. “I placed a post-it note on the recipes I think may work for the soft opening, but I’d like for you to make a sample of them beforehand. Maybe just a few a day.”

You nod, acknowledging his request but far too focused on scooping your guesstimate of flour. Nanami eyes you carefully, brown eyes staring as you carefully run your finger over the top of the flour. The excess falls carelessly onto the table and just before you pour it in, Nanami speaks, his voice halting your movements.

“What are you making now?”

“Hmm?” You ask, glancing over at him. “Oh, something called…” you peer down at the booklet, “Wee-ner-brod?” You’re one hundred percent positive you butchered that pronunciation, but how do you even pronounce ‘wienerbrød’? 

Clearly Nanami knows because he surprisingly lets out an amused chuckle before he asks, “Wienerbrød?” With what you assume is perfect pronunciation. And you’re not sure why, but the sound of his deep baritone laugh makes your stomach twist in a strangely pleasant way.

“Yes! That!” You point to Nanami with your free finger. “I’m making…” you stumble your way through the pronunciation again and get another small laugh from Mr. Nanami which makes your own lips curl up in a smile.

“I didn’t know you knew how to make Danish pastries.”

“I don’t, but you don’t learn without trying.”

“True. What step are you on now?” Nanami asks curiously, coming up to stand next to you. This close to him, you can truly see just how large he is. Not to mention, he smells incredible. You ignore the way the mix of the aroma of baked goods and his cologne almost makes your eyes want to roll back. You’d never smelled something so tantalizing before.

Nanami calls your name and you clear your throat, trying to re-focus.

“Oh, um…well I’ve added mostly everything and now I need to incorporate the flour - about 2 ½ cups.”

“Your calculation is off.” He affirms gently, eyeing the measuring cup in your hand.

You snort, “Are you suddenly an expert in Danish baking or something?”

“I can throw a few things together.” He says and you peek over to see him rolling the sleeves of his very nice (and probably very expensive) shirt up to his elbows. Your eyes roam over, drinking in the sight of those thick veins that you couldn’t get out of your head over the weekend protruding from his forearms, the way his muscles flex with the slightest movement and you wonder for a moment what it would be like to grab onto those arms while he –

“As I was saying,” Nanami’s quiet voice interrupts your reverie. “2 ½ cups is close, but you actually need 2 ¾ cups for this recipe.” He reaches in front of you to grab a ¾ measuring cup and again, you’re assaulted with the scent of his cologne. Your mind erupts with thoughts of nothing appropriate for an employee to be thinking about their boss, but you can’t help it!

You blame it on that damn smile of his and that laugh. It’s thrown you off of your game.

Nanami takes the measuring cup you’re holding and replaces it with another. “You also need to use your hands to mix this.”

You might faint.

“Is that…” you lick your lips, mouth suddenly feeling dry. “Is that completely necessary?”

Nanami slowly adds small amounts of flour into the mixer bowl while kneading with his other hand. “It’s time consuming, of course, but it allows for more control over the dough. You can feel the dough's texture…if it’s too dry or if it’s too wet. From there you can determine if more water or more flour is needed.” You watch as his brows furrow in concentration, a little surprised by his knowledge around dough. Though it shouldn’t be surprising given that he grew up in this very same bakery. Of course he’d know.

And once again, your stomach does somersaults.

Damnit, he was definitely going to need to stay out of the kitchen if you were going to stay employed here.

As Nanami continues working through the recipe, you chat idly about general things. He tells you a bit about his time as a businessman, but doesn’t elaborate on what exactly led him to own a bakery. And you tell him a bit about yourself, trying to keep the conversation light as this was the most you’d both interacted since your interview and you’re surprised by how well it’s going. You don’t want to ruin it by poking and prodding.

As the conversation goes on, you watch him very carefully as he works the dough, ignoring the way your heart races watching him do the very thing you do almost daily.

“The end result should be somewhat sticky,” he states.

And oh god, something was getting sticky alright…and it lay between your legs. Your eyes are glued to the bulging muscles of Nanami’s forearms working the flour into a thick doughy substance between his large, thick fingers. Your gaze moves up his stupidly sexy arms, to his biceps straining against his shirt and you imagine him flexing so hard, it rips to shreds, falling in tatters to the floor. The cartoonish image almost makes you want to laugh. And you would have if your eyes hadn’t continued their journey, higher to his tight shoulders moving in circles as he presses his palms into the dough. Higher to the tension in his jaw, the muscles rippling as he grits his teeth with focus. The kitchen suddenly feels unbearably hot and you’re not sure if it’s the ovens running causing the temperature to rise or the view in front of you.

Nanami had never mentioned he knew how to bake. But why would he? It was your job to know. You also never thought to ask after the sour note your interview ended on despite you still being offered the position. You could not stand him upon first meeting and now here you were practically drooling into this batter over how incredibly sexy he was when he was baking.

Nanami slowly pours flour in again as he kneads the dough with expert precision. The way he grips it in his hands, the way his fingers deftly sprinkle flour into the mix. You wonder what else those big hands can do.

The oven timer dings and you snap out of your lewd thoughts, pretty sure sweat is forming on your forehead from your fantasies. You spin around quickly to slide on oven mitts before you pull the pans from the oven. You’d chosen to make miniature fruit tarts with a vanilla pastry cream. A simple recipe, but absolutely to die for. Setting the tray down, you return to Nanami’s side just as he finishes kneading the dough.

And you try to hide the frown pulling at the corner of your lips when you realize you’d lost your perfect view.

He moves to the sink to wash the remaining dough from his hands, returning with plastic wrap to cover the mixing bowl. “I hope you weren’t planning on completing that today,” He says before turning to head toward the walk-in refrigerator. When he emerges, you shoot him a questioning look.

“I was going to let the dough rise for a few hours while I worked on some other things.”

He hums in acknowledgment, but shakes his head. “For this dough, you need to do a long rise for the best result. Overnight is best.”

“Okay, you’re the expert Danish pastry baker apparently,” you tease, earning you another small chuckle from him and you feel your face heat up at the sound.

What is with you today?

“How did you come up with the idea to make Wienerbrød anyway?” He questions suddenly. “Just seems a bit random given what recipes you’d given me to review.”

“Oh!” You rush back over to the mixers excitedly and grab the booklet, holding it up for Nanami to see, a wide grin on your face. “I found this under one of the mixers. It has some strange language I can’t read in the front of it…I’m assuming it’s Danish? But some delicious sounding recipes from what I could understand when I skimmed through. I decided this would be a good idea to take myself out of my comfort zone to try something new.”

Nanami takes a step forward, squinting hard at the little journal in your hands. Suddenly, his eyes widen slightly and he snatches the book from your hold. He opens it to the first page, where the foreign message is scrawled down before he snaps the book shut, his lips pursing in displeasure.

He pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs in clear irritation. “Next time you find something that is very clearly a personal belonging, please bring it to me before you take it upon yourself to poke through something that isn’t yours,” he snaps, his voice clipped.

The shift in tone takes you aback.

“Oh. I’m sorry, Mr. Nanami. It just seemed to belong to someone who knew their way around baking so I–”

“I didn’t ask for the reasoning behind your nosiness,” he cuts you off and you feel your own irritation begin to slowly rise. “Is this a habit of yours? Digging through people’s belongings and taking things that aren’t yours?”

You scoff, folding your arms across your chest defensively. “If you’d let me finish, I’m trying to apologize –”

“I don’t want an apology. I want you to show up here, bake and leave. Not spend your time digging through someone else’s belongings.”

You inhale sharply, trying to gather your thoughts. This conversation has taken an unpleasant turn and the last thing you want to do is have a blow up with your boss. You feel like you’ve actually made progress with him today and this feels like a setback waiting to happen.

“Again, Mr. Nanami, that wasn’t my intention. I just wanted to try something new. I had no idea this book…” you wave your hand in his direction. “...would be such a sore spot for you.”

At this, Nanami seems to bristle. “My sore spot,” he stresses the words, “is nosey employees who don’t just do the job I asked them to do. I asked you to make a sample pastry –”

“And I did,” you cut him off, gesturing to your tarts cooling on the table. “And I had enough time to try my hand at something new, which is why I wanted to try something new and present it to you.”

You sigh when Nanami meets your response with silence.

“What’s the issue here? You had no problem with helping me make this until you saw that book,” you say, pointing at the small black journal he holds. Your gazes lock in an intense staredown and even as Nanami annoys you, you can’t help but find his frustratingly pretty brown eyes completely mesmerizing. 

Ugh, stop.

“The issue,” Nanami stresses, “is you sticking your nose where it doesn’t belong.”

“Excuse me? It’s just a recipe book. Why are you so upset about it? Is it yours or something?”

“Again, poking your nose where it doesn’t belong.”

“Mr. Nanami, with all due…respect,” you grit out the last word because he was really starting to piss you off, “if we’re going to be working together as closely as we are, there needs to be some trust here. It’s just a recipe book. I apologize for overstepping, but you can tell me why referencing this book to make Weenerbrod is such a big deal.”

You could swear you see the ghost of a smile on his lips just before he rolls his eyes, correcting your pronunciation of the pastry again, just as he turns his back to you. “You are my employee, I am your employer and that’s it. My helping you to bake a simple bread does not make us friends. Please complete the sample pastries I requested of you and we can reconvene once they’re finished. End of discussion.”

Nanami heads to his office without another word, slamming the door behind him.

You can only watch him disappear from your sight, seething. Left standing in the kitchen alone after yet another faceoff with your new boss, you’re suddenly reminded of your earlier conversation with Shoko.

Just try not to let him walk all over you. You’ve worked with plenty of dickheads before. What’s one more?

You resist going after Nanami and giving him a piece of your mind, instead following his instructions to finish your samples. You won’t push him. Clearly that little book meant something to him and he had no intention of sharing. And he was right. It wasn’t your business to know…

…But you can’t help feeling upset that the light mood of earlier is now gone.

You sigh, ignoring the pit in your stomach as your anger begins to subside. Instead, you move to the walk in refrigerator, gathering the ingredients to make the vanilla cream for your tarts.

Your mind is still racing with the conversation that just took place even as you mix your ingredients and pack the cream into the icing decorating bags. You realize for the first time since meeting Nanami that he wasn’t only this stoic tyrant that enjoys barking orders. He was someone with interests, someone with depth, someone who clearly enjoyed the art of baking the same way you do. You saw the look in his eyes as he guided you through making this pastry. And while you’ve barely known Nanami, you’re familiar with the look on someone’s face when they’ve participated in their passion. He looked…happy. Clearly, there’s more to Nanami than you know.

More to him than what he was willing to show you. For now. 

You’re annoyingly positive.

Shoko’s words make you roll your eyes as they echo in her head. Because you know she’s right.

[groenendaelfic]

Hey,

haven't seen you around a lot lately. Just writing to check in. how is it going? Wish you a nice evening

it is going, thank you for asking!

Life has been very busy these past few months but is moving in a hopefully good and definitely exciting direction.

In this particular order (if memory serves correctly) I've:

decided to move halfway across the continent

marked the one year anniversary of the worst time of my life

had other people mark the one year anniversary of the worst time of my life with all that entails

quit my job (I'd been planning that for a while)

had my boss and hr offer to let me go instead and half my notice period to two months (aka 'give' me more money and facilitate my move, yay pity)

started looking for a place to live and organizing my move

found a new job in a slightly different corner of halfway across the continent (I start July 1st)

got my request for citizenship approved (epic timing guys)

found a place to live in an awesome area (I will be able to do all my errands on foot and my new job is only a short bike ride away)

told everyone I was leaving for sure

signed the paperwork to have my uncle in law take over the place here

had my cousin offer to move my stuff with his remodeled fire engine in exchange for gas and (bridge) tolls

did all the paperwork in the universe ever

started saying my goodbyes for now (I still have lots of family and friends etc here so I'll be back a lot)

had my cousin tell me he'd make a bro trip out of the move because his friends really wanted to see a basic bridge, and room and board plus no girls was all the compensation they needed for getting to carry my boxes

said thanks but no thanks to citizenship (sorry Wille, you'll always be my King)

was asked if I minded the move taking a bit longer because the guys wanted to stop for totally unplanned soccer (a not insignificant part of their motivation if not a deciding factor I dare say)

did more move and job leaving planning and paperwork

welcomed, fed and watered a bunch of guys really into soccer bridges and very disappointed I didn't have more boxes they could compete carrying

prepared a big lunch basket and said goodbye to said guys and my boxes

sat down to write this list wondering where I should celebrate midsummer (aka do I want to travel back and forth to get everything ready or stay until it's time to hand in my work laptop etc)

Phew, yes. Also a million other things which won't come to mind right now. Thank you to everyone who left me such kind messages btw. I appreciate them so much but am still learning to respond to kindness and compliments without awkwardness. They nevertheless give me life.

In more interesting news to everyone here I've also done a lot of writing.

Mostly on One Wild Summer, which has already grown into a monster, but I've been writing the exciting parts later on and still guesstimate a 15k or so stretch which needs bridging to get to all the fun stuff I've already written.

but also on The Prince and the Barista and As Long as We Have Each Other. I only need to make it coherent and once again fill the gap to where I stopped posting.

plus *cue exasperated sighs* I'm also 9k+ into a new fic! The (once more) absolutely most self-indulgent thing I've ever written in this fandom and something I swore I never would turn into a proper fic. Expect the prologue for that (which was meant to be 500 words and not 5k) soonish.

Everything else including regular updates not before mid to late July though I think. Because moving and starting a new job and life means busy times and while I can write scribble down connected sentences with half a mind, I can't beta read and edit with half a mind.

tl;dr: I am still writing yr fic and haven't abandoned my fics, but am also busy moving. goodbye cloudberries and lingonberries, hello wineberries vineyards and appleberries apple orchards.

[the-real-rain-world-confessions]

“The ultimate hater” is back

Five Pebbles is genuinely the most annoying iterator there is. How he’s portrayed in the fandom, hell even the game, just upsets me. He’s either some uwu cat boy or some angry bitch. All the time. It’s fucking awful and I hope he dies. He is genuinely not worth more of my time.

Looks to the Moon is presented too naively, or too gentle. I never visit her in-game because there’s no reason to. Ignoring the mandatory visits for certain campaigns, that is. She feels like she only exists for in-game info that you don’t even need to know. She sucks at her job too.

No Significant Harassment is the worst. Ah yes, give your cat cancer and then send it to its death to revive a friend who will forever be isolated and damaged for the rest of her life. Like seriously?? He should’ve just left Moon alone. He put her through so much more suffering than she would’ve gone through if she had just stayed offline. And he didn’t even bother to send another messenger??? He brings her back to life in a broken state, then never even bothers to try and talk to her again. What a great friend 🙄

Seven Red Suns is… pathetic. He literally kills two iterators and his only response is just “sorry I didn’t realize you were too desperate”. Not only that but the genetic modification he put his cat through? No mouth, no mark of communication, such a frail body. I get that the lack of a mark was because he wanted them to not be detected, which just shows he knows he was doing something he shouldn’t have! He also makes no fucking attempts to help the situation! He dooms two Iterators, and send a “oops my bad” message to one of them before fucking off to never been seen from again. And yes, I know his “canon” pronouns are they/them. I don’t care.

Chasing / Grey Wind’s only relevance is to tattle on Pebbles for being in a sliverist group chat. And then no one questions how she is in the group herself??? What gives her the right to tell someone else’s business to her group? And it doesn’t even lead anywhere. She just decided to be a snitch, then goes and tells Suns that Pebbles is dying, and Moon is dead. The most forgettable Rainworld Iterator.

Unparalleled Innocence. She is… definitely existing. I hate how the fandom mostly just makes her a complete and total snob. She’s a bitch for no reason. Sure she leaked Pebbles cancer to everyone, but it was probably deserved. Or hell maybe she was trying to find someone to help because clearly NO ONE CARED ENOUGH TO DO SO. Another forgettable iterator.

Sliver of Straw is wasted potential. Having her be dead since the start of the game, and the only interactions with her being super fucking cryptid and non-canon is the worst. I honestly would’ve preferred is she never showed up anywhere in game, Enot’s campaign or not. Okay wasted potential isn’t the right term, but she would’ve been so much more interesting if she was just some story. She never existed in the first place; was just something the Ancient’s made up to make the other Iterator’s work harder towards an answer. She never should’ve been in the challenges or Enot’s campaign. Not forgettable but regretfully so.

I can and will rant about the Slugcats one day. Just you wait.

.

[pinkdaisies9285]

Do the Fates Sing of Us?

Bob Floyd x F!Reader (Callsign: Nightingale)

Warnings: Angst with a Fluff ending, implied cheating, miscommunication trope

Word Count: 2,993

Author's Note: Hello! It's been a while since my last update but here is my next story! This one took a little longer but I wanted it to be really good. Thank you again my beta readers for reading. I hope you enjoy!

Why did you think this was a good idea? Trying to go back to the way things were before. Before you knew his warm embrace. Before you knew how he liked his coffee, sweet and not black, like most military men. Before you knew how kind his heart was.

His heart. The one thing he gave you so willingly and you broke it. Tore it to shreds, that someone will have to take the time to pick up every piece and mend it back together. Hopefully, they’ll be better to him than you were. Thinking about how much you hurt him and that you’ll never earn back his trust. This was what tore you apart, the loss of trust.

Is this what Hera felt when she realized Zeus wouldn’t ever warm her bed and heart? Feeling like you’re cursed to love a man who will never love you. Is this what all the great Greek tragedies felt like in real-time? Knowing your fate is to be one of woe and despair without your loved one?

A soft knock shook you out of the spiral you were in. Looking up, Natasha was standing in the doorway of your office.

“Hey, Tasha. What’s up?” you softly asked. You felt nervous talking to your ex’s coworker, but all your ex’s coworkers are also yours.

“Just wanted to see how you’re doing,” she replied leaning against the doorway.

This surprised you, considering you were the one who destroyed her WSO. You thought she would hate your guts. She would come to chew you out, not check up on you.

“I’m fine, I guess. I just lost the most important person in my life so I don’t know if I could feel better than fine,” you said while looking down at your desk filled with papers. The pages of patient information seemed more interesting than discussing your feelings.

“What happened, Nightingale? Like truly happened,” Natasha asked with a highly concerned expression.

What happened? One moment you were in a wonderful relationship with Bob and the next he was telling you that you weren’t worth the pain. The whole fight made you confused and angry. The anger was what destroyed you and the relationship. You had gotten so angry at Bob for accusing you of things that weren’t true that you threw it back into his face. Those words were what made the fight explode into flames. His face morphed from hurt to anger like you had never seen.

“I fucked up Tasha, that’s what happened. I said things I shouldn’t have and now he’s gone,” you lamented while looking at her. Natasha’s face showed utter pity. She knew something had happened between her WSO and her best friend, but not this.

“Well, have you tried to talk to him? Bob has always been understanding,” Natasha tried to suggest.

“I don’t think talking will fix this, Tasha. Besides you guys are leaving for five months tomorrow, it’s too late,” tears were starting to well up in your eyes. You lost something so important to you and now you have to bury the pain. He would never want you again, you said he was useless. You said that he wasn’t even close to what his fellow pilots could do. You said all his worst fears just because he had said yours.

–

He had said that you were cheating on him with another nurse at the base. That you were doing what all his past girlfriends had done, left him for someone “better.” None of this was true, the nurse he had accused you of cheating with was someone you would never go for. Apollo was a jerk who flirted with anything on two legs. He would try to make you see that he was so great at his job and that you two would be great together. Tired of his antics, you decided to play with fire.

“You’re so right, Apollo. That worthless WSO isn’t good enough for me. I should definitely be with a man like you,” you said with heavy sarcasm, which this man was known for completely missing the point.

“Really, Nightingale? Well, then–”

“No, Apollo, that’s what I would say if I were stupid enough to think a lazy idiotic man like you would actually be worth my time. So, please kindly fuck off, Apollo. You’ll never come close to Bob. Never in a million years,” you cut him off before he could become any more delusional than he was.

Little did you know that Bob had initially heard your “flirting” but didn’t stay for your rebuttal. He had come to surprise you with lunch but instead heard you call him worthless. Something he had been called before and knew he had to leave immediately.

When he confronted you later that day, he was broken and angry. He had tear stains streaking his face when he asked.

“So when were you going to tell me it was over? Huh? That you didn’t want to be with a “worthless WSO” like me?” he said this while trying not to let his anger spike. The anger was what surprised you.

“What do you mean, Bobby? Leaving you?” confusion laced your words while you had a troubled look on your face. Why would you leave him and call him worthless? Then it dawned on you.

“I heard you talking to Apollo, Nightingale. I know I’m only a WSO and not a pilot but that doesn’t mean I’m worthless. I know my value but it seems you have overlooked that,” he was shaking when he finished saying this. His voice had raised to a level you had never seen, kind of scared you.

“Bobby, what you heard wasn’t true. I said that to get him off–”

“It doesn’t matter if you didn’t mean it, Nightingale, you said it which means you meant it!” Bob yelled. He started to get a fire in his eyes that reminded you of an angry god. You had never seen him like this, hands curled into fists, eyes full of emotions, and his khaki uniform in disarray.

“Bob I didn’t realize that you were there but what I said after that was the truth,” you said with a desperate look in your eyes. This roller coaster of emotions was not what you were expecting. What could you do to make him believe you?

“Do you think I’m a joke? I’ve been through this before, Nightingale. I know I’m not worth it most of the time and I will always be the second choice. Yet, for once I thought I wasn’t but I guess I was wrong,” he shook his head while saying this.

Now you were angry. You couldn’t believe that he still thought of himself like this. You know that Bob was so much more than he thought but maybe you would never change his mind. You always had this fear that your love wouldn’t be enough for him. That you couldn’t be enough for him to realize he was the man of your dreams. You didn’t want anyone else and now you had to fight for it. This uphill battle you have fought for yourself and Bob.

“Will you stop saying that! Stop saying that you are not worth love and that you are the second choice! I get so sick and tired of you dragging yourself down!”

“But its tru–”

“No, it’s not true! You were never my second choice and you were always my only love. Bob, I’m tired. I’m tired of trying to get you to see this. I don’t know if I can do this anymore,” you said while tears were free falling down your face like a fountain of woes.

“What do you mean, Nightingale?” Bob asked with a quivering tone in his voice.

“I can’t keep trying while you’re not doing anything.”

Bob was going through a roller coaster of emotions. It was written all over his face, he knew what was going to happen.

“I think it’s best if we break up, Bob. I think we’re not happy with each other anymore and I’m tired of feeling worthless,” you said with defeat in your voice.

“So that’s it? You’re done with us?” Bob had gone back to anger once he heard these words. This wasn’t the outcome either of you had expected this conversation to go. This conversation was a house of cards that collapsed under pressure.

“Yes, Bobby, I think we need time apart if this is how we will be.”

These words were like a pair of twin daggers into both of your hearts. Twisting and jabbing the hurt deeper by the second. Bob felt like he had messed up big time when he realized you wouldn’t change your mind. Now, he had made his bed so he was going to lay in it.

“I guess then that’s it. Goodbye, Nightingale,” Bob said.

After that, he went back to his old truck and left. He didn’t put up a fight anymore and put the final nail into the coffin. All your fears had been turned into truths that rang so clearly that it shattered you completely. Now you had to live with the fact that the only man you wanted to live the rest of your life with is gone. Gone were the days filled with laughter and love. Gone were the days when you had your rock.

–

After you had cried in Natasha’s arms about the outcome of your and Bob’s relationship, you threw yourself into your work. Filing paperwork, checking on patients, and giving out stickers to the base kids who had come in for their shots. You did everything you could to forget that now you were alone and that even your best friend was not here. Natasha had also gone on the five-month mission with most of the Daggers. So, you had to figure out how to cope on your own. This wasn’t the first time you had to patch yourself back together alone.

When your grandma died, she was the only one who supported you through your entire life. Which meant no one was there for you afterward. She had been practically your mom because your own wasn’t present. She made you into the woman you are and you felt hollow once she was gone.

That was what you were feeling now, hollow. An empty husk of a person who didn’t know how to ask Death for your soul back.

For five months now, you have felt barely there. The talk with Natasha had rang through your brain for weeks now. With the end of her and Bob’s mission coming closer, you’ve had time to organize your thoughts on what to do. Which led to the final decision that you had to talk to Bob. You needed some type of closure, whether it was getting him back or not. You’ve felt like there was a ghost of Bob present all the time. Whether it was the coffee cup he always used or the faint scent of his cologne that lingered on your pillows, he was there. This made you realize you can’t settle with this specter of the man you loved. You wanted the real thing, the real Bob. So, at the three-month mark, you changed your mind about wanting closure. You wanted to try and fight for him. You wanted him back. He was your soulmate, you knew it and you’d be damned if you didn’t try to fight for him back.

With this new-found motivation, you decided to think back to how you handled the fight. You thought about how when you decided to play with fire it wasn’t a smart choice and it really destroyed the trust you had with Bob. You should’ve known better than to use the word “worthless” when you were talking about Bob. He had voiced his fears and insecurities that came from past relationships and you used it in such a way that not only reopened the wound for him but deepened it even more. You squeezed lemon juice straight into it by continuing to the farce. You felt like such a fool for thinking that your actions wouldn’t have some form of consequences.

Either way, now was the time to fight back. You knew Bob would be back at the Hard Deck the day after he came back which would be the best time to approach him. You had already texted Natasha about wanting to talk to him again and try to fix this. She had given you her full support, it was hard seeing her best friend and her WSO broken. So, you and her had made a plan to make sure he would be there and you could talk to him privately on the beach. You felt this had to go perfectly or you would lose him again.

–

The Hard Deck was packed like it always is after a deployment has ended. Officers were filling up every corner, but your only focus was finding one officer. Weaving around the men and women in khakis, you found the Dagger Squad in their regular corner near the pool table and dart board.

Your hands were sweaty and you felt out of place, something you hadn’t felt in years. Would he listen to you? Or would he simply brush you off and find a woman who was better than you? All these thoughts were running around your head that you didn’t notice you had almost made it to him.

Natasha had already acknowledged you when you walked in and was waiting for you to signal her. She knew to keep all the Daggers inside so you could sort this out. You nodded at her before you took a deep breath of courage. This was it, time to win your man back.

You approached Bob with a trembling heart but hope slowly blossomed in it. He was sitting in his regular corner and hadn’t looked up. You were trying to find the right words to say to him. Yet, your mind was a blank page standing in front of him.

“Bobby?”

Upon hearing your voice, he quickly snapped his head up. Finally, making eye contact with him made you even more nervous, what do you say now?

“Nightingale? What are you doing here?”

His voice was softer than you were expecting, there wasn’t a hard edge or malice to it. With his reply being more surprised than angry, you took that as a sign that your plan would work. Gathering more courage, you decide that it’s now or never.

“Would you mind coming outside to talk with me? Please?” your voice was soft but it slightly broke towards the end.

All Bob did was give you a small nod and gesture to the door. Leading the way, you make your way out to the beach so you can have some privacy.

Stopping so you were far from the Hard Deck, you turned around to face him. He had his hands in his pockets with a neutral expression on his face. Taking a deep breath, you began.

“Bobby, I know that I messed up. I want to talk about what happened and fix this.”

“Fix this?” he asked calmly.

“Yes, Bobby, while you were gone I was a shell of a person without you. I realized that how I handled Apollo was wrong and I should’ve been better about how I rejected him,” you said this without breathing in between your words. You wanted to make this better, and not worse.

Bob was standing there frozen and unsure what to say. His face had a multitude of emotions crossing it but there was a small glimmer of hope flickering in his eyes. This was what made you continue.

“I will say I think we should go to couples therapy if we do get back together. There are things that we both need to figure out and I know I want to do it with you. So please, Bobby, come back to me.”

By this time, you were a fountain of tears that looked like falling stars in the moonlight. You felt so desperate for this man to say something, but what you didn’t expect was to see him crying as well.

“Nightingale, I was a shell as well during my deployment. All I could think about was you and how we ended things was broken. I think we both shattered each other’s souls and left twin daggers in each other’s hearts but I want to heal with you, darling,” Bob said while wiping away your tears. He had walked up right after wiping his own and cradled your face like it was the most precious treasure in the whole world. His hands were warm and it filled the gaping wound that was left by the dagger. It trickled down slowly but surely and gave you hope.

All you could do was reply with a watery smile and lean into his hold. You knew that the road back to a strong relationship would be bumpy but worth it. Bob was your soulmate and you would do anything to make sure you and him see eye to eye. It was time that you and him shed your ghosts of the past and burn your skeletons that have been in the closet. Both of you know while staring into each other’s eyes that together you could rekindle your relationship and make it burn even brighter than before.

You leaned in and kissed him to seal your fate. A fate that no one else could change. One that was sung carefully by the proud Fates. Yet, all you could think was Fates be damned because you knew that you and Bob were not fated to fall apart. No. You were fated to sing your own destiny in harmony with him till the end of your lives. The Fates sang of a false ending that would never come.

Please like, comment, and/or reblog!

Masterlist

Divider Credit: @cafekitsune

[kpop---scenarios]

Hidden Lies (1)

Pairing: Unknown x Reader

Warning: Violence, Crime, Almost Assault

Word Count: 4.9k

A/N: This is a remake of Poisonous Lies. Some parts may be familiar, and that would be why. I hope you enjoy!! Let me know who you think she'll connect more with!

This morning you woke up, listening to the sounds of birds chirping, the sun shining through your window, and feeling like it was going to be a great day. 

“YN.” Your mom yells. It was too early and you were trying to wake up peacefully. “Y/N!” She calls out again, but this time it's more of a screech. 

You groan loudly, folding your pillow over your ears, wanting to enjoy a little bit of time without her yelling at you. The sound of her shrieking voice was coming closer every second, until it was practically right in your ear. 

Your eyes are still closed as you feel your blanket being ripped off your body, your mom cursing at you. 

“Wake the fuck up!” She yells. “Don't you hear me yelling for you? I have shit to do, I cannot keep waking you up in the mornings! damn, you're going to make us both late” 

You were 22 years old and you still live with your mother. This life you had was sad, although it was your fault. This technically was your choice. You had decided to drop out of school and go home to help your mom out after your dad was sentenced to 10 years in prison for a lengthy list of crimes, although well it wasn't his fault, it also was at the same time. 

Your father had lost his job, and instead of telling your mother and them trying to figure it out, he went and got a loan from some people involved in crime that he most definitely should have not gone to. He didn't think about the fact that he would have had to pay that money back, plus interest. And when the time came for them to collect he didn't have it. So he was recruited for odd jobs until he had paid everything back, he didn't get very far though. His last job ended up being a sting operation and he was charged with trafficking drugs, intent to sell, attempted kidnapping, attempted human trafficking and a few other things. He wouldn't tell them why he did it, he didn't want things to get any worse, even though you weren't sure if they could or not. It wasn't his finest moment, he was trying to help his family even if it was the worst way possible. He was a good man and a good dad. Your father was a man who would do anything for his family, especially to protect them, and that’s exactly why he did what he did and now he was suffering the consequences of his own actions. 

“I swear to god, YN.” Your mom yells as she grabs your arm, trying to pull you out of bed. “If you don't get your ass up in the next 30 seconds, I'm going to lose my mind! Your train leaves in 45 minutes and if you dont get ready and leave in 10 minutes then you're not going to be able to see your dad.” She sighs. “It’s his birthday, remember.”

Shit. You quickly bolt up in bed, scrambling to get out of your bed. You were rushing around your room grabbing whatever looked the cleanest on your floor before heading to your bathroom, slamming the door in the process. 

Your mom sighs loudly before she leaves your room so you can rush around and get ready. You knew it was hard for her, not having your dad around, and you were sometimes difficult but you were trying. You felt guilty, especially since she wasn't able to go on the visit today, her shitty boss wouldn't let her have the time off. It had only been a year since he’d been locked up and you, mom and your brother had faced some very hard times. The three of you have been barely surviving paying the bills, mortgage, car, gas, groceries as well as trying to pay back your dad's loan in cash, rather than jobs similar to what your dad did.

Your mom was working 2 jobs, you and your brother both working full time, and all your money went towards everything needing to be paid, rarely leaving you much of anything left over but the three of you made it work, you always figured it out. You would do whatever you needed to do. 

You're running down the stairs, trying to put your hair into a semi decent bun and forfeiting any makeup. 

“You ready?” Your mom asks, car keys in her hand. 

“Yeah, just let me grab my bag.” you breathe. You run into the kitchen, snatching your purse from the counter before you head back to the front door that's left wide open. You roll your eyes heading out the door, closing it behind you before sliding into the passenger seat of the car the three of you shared. 

Your mom doesn't say a word to you on the ride to the train station. You hold your train ticket in your hand as she pulls in front of the station. “Please tell him happy birthday from me and that I love him.” she whispers as you're getting out of the car. 

You give her a half smile. “I will mom.” You say, getting out of the car and closing the door. It doesn't take you long to navigate your way through the station, you’ve been making this trip a few times a month. You tried to see him as much as you could but between work, work and work, you never had a ton of time. You picked a seat on the train, setting your bag down in the seat beside you. You just made it on time, seconds later you were on your way and you couldn't wait to see your dad. 

You stood in line, waiting to have your bag checked and to go through the x-ray machine. When that was all clear you headed to the front desk, showing your ID and filling out paperwork before you could even go into the room and wait for him. You sit down, your stomach is twisting with nerves. You weren't sure why, this was like any other visit you had been on. 

“LN, YN.” You hear. “You can head in now.” the guard finishes, pointing towards a visitation room. The door buzzes open and you see your dad immediately, sitting in the back, in the middle of the room. His fingers were locked together with his head down. It felt like it had been forever since you had last seen him. “Dad.” you sniffle and his head shoots up, a smile spreads across his face so quickly as he stands up from his chair. You walk towards him, his arms are wide open, waiting to embrace you. You crash into his chest, wrapping your arms around him as he does you, holding you tightly. You missed his hugs, and the safeness you felt from him. You couldn't remember the last time you had felt safe.

You both let go, tears brimming in your eyes as you both sit down across from each other. 

“Happy birthday dad.” you smile. He reaches out to grab your hand, whispering a small thank you while his head hangs low. “Mom also wishes you a happy birthday, and she says that she loves you.” You tell him, but you knew he already knew that. 

“I know,” he smiles. “I'm assuming that she had to work today?” he asks. 

You nod your head. 

“She tried to get the time off but you know Dave, he’s a dick and wouldn't even let her have the morning off.” you tell him.

But again, you knew he already knew that. Dave and your dad had been friends for years, but after your dad was sentenced the man acted as if he never knew him and was never friends with him. Your eyes wander around the room, as if anything would be different since the last time you were here. Your dad begins telling you a story, something funny that had happened the other day. You were listening, but you couldn't help but let your eyes wander.

You looked out into the common room, as you were scanning the room, your eyes landed on someone. A man, a very handsome dark haired, angry looking man staring directly at you. You tried to look away from him, but it's like you were locked in with him. He was so captivating you honestly didn't even want to look away, but you do, not before he smiles at you slightly, giving you a small wink. 

You’re brought out of your trance by your dad clearing his throat before continuing on with his story. You catch the end of it, laughing along with him even though you didn't really hear the rest of it. “Tell me about everything. What’s going on with you? How is your brother?” he asks. Before you can answer the lights of the prison flicker, the alarm blares as the red siren lights up the room on beat with the alarms. 

“What’s happening?” you yell over the loud sounds. You were feeling a little panicked but before your dad could say anything you both hear yelling. You looked at the commotion in the common room, which was only separated from the visiting room by one large metal door. You glanced around, seeing the other visitors watching what was happening but no one was reacting to anything. 

“I'm sure the guards will get it sorted, fights break out all the time. No need to worry.” Your dad tells you, trying to reassure you. 

You couldn't help but worry. You watched as more and more fights were beginning to break out between prisoners, prisoners and guards. You watched in horror, as the prisoners seemingly took the guards down more easily then they should have been able too. Your eyes were darting to every window that you could see and watched guard after guard collapse, inmates grabbing the guns or batons, a cluster of inmates slamming guards into the windows, shaking what is supposed to be bullet proof glass. 

Seconds later a fight in the visiting room breaks out after an inmate bashes a guard's head against the table. You're panicking now, other visitors are screaming, leaving their tables trying to escape, some pounding on the door, begging the guards to let them out.

The inmates from the common room begin trying to shoot the windows, or trying to pry open the doors into the visiting room. 

The doors were buzzed open letting the guards from the front now rush in from one side to try and calm the situation but instead they let the inmates rush through the other doors into the room where you and your dad were. He had taken you to the corner of the room, standing in front of you to protect you. You peek out from behind him, the two of you watching in horror as blood and tears are spilled, the cries and pleas from visitors are yelled out as the inmates attack anyone in their way, including those who were just trying to visit their loved ones. 

Your heart is pounding so loud, you can hear it in your ears. You feel weak, light headed. Your adrenaline hasn't kicked in yet. Your stomach is churning at all of the blood. Your father grabs your hand pulling you with him through another open door, and hopefully to safety. As soon as the two of you make it into another room, you're confronted by three large men. 

“Look.” Your dad begins. “We don't want any trouble. I'm just trying to keep my daughter safe.”

The man in front smiles, but even his smile is terrifying. 

“What a good dad you are. But don't worry.” He says. “We'll take her from here. I'll personally keep her safe.” He finishes, licking his lips. 

“No thank you.” your dad says. “We're just going to go.” You grip onto your dads orange jumpsuit. 

“Dad.” You whisper. He can hear the fear in your voice. 

He runs forward, punching the man, pushing him into the two men behind him. “Run YN! Run!” He screams as the men grab him, taking him elsewhere. You try to run for the door but you're grabbed, pulled back and pushed against the wall. The man who had been talking to your father stood inches from your face. You could see the evil in his eyes as he eyed you up. You can feel his breath on your neck as he moves closer towards you.

You look both ways, trying to find your way to escape. There's only one other door besides the one you came through and you're pretty sure it's locked. Fear jolts through your body as you try and think of anything you could possibly say or do to get yourself out of this situation but you know that there is nothing you can do, except try and fight. 

“Get away from me!” you yell, putting your hands on his chest and pushing as hard as you can. 

"Don't fucking do that.” He snaps, shoving you against the wall. He raises his hand as he gets closer to you, his finger tracing your face. You squeeze your eyes shut, tears rolling down your cheeks and you let out a scream, as loud as you could. You switched between yelling "help me." And screaming, hoping someone would come for you. 

The man slaps his hand over your mouth, angrily. "Why would you do that, don't you like me?" He asks. "It's been a long fucking time since we've been this close to a woman." He chuckles. You can feel his body pressing against you. You try to focus on anything else, but all you can hear is the sound of him breathing and the screams and cries of the ones caught in the riot. 

Just as you were about to give up, you feel a release. You can no longer feel his body pressing against you, you can hear yelling much closer. You open your eyes and see a dark haired man, and a familiar other dark haired man pulling the men away from you. Within seconds the man who wanted to attack you was down on the floor, and the two men who saved you grabbed your hands, pulling you out of the room and away from the chaos. 

Where was your dad? Was he okay? 

The three of you ran down a hallway, the alarms are still blaring, you can just barely hear police sirens from outside. 

The two men had no idea where to go, everywhere you looked there was violence, inmates with weapons and minimal guards that were alive. 

"Hey!" You hear from down the hall. You all turn around and see the man that had you pinned against the wall. Anger suddenly fuels you, wondering where your dad was. 

“What did you do to my dad!?” You scream. The man stops walking, a grin spreads across his face. “Don't worry, he's just fine. Now you two.” He says, pointing to the two men who were still holding onto you. “You don't get to take what's not yours.” He frowns. “I want her back.” He yells down the hall. The two men who had taken your father appear behind him. 

“Fuck.” One says. they turn around, pulling you in a different direction. You were turning corner after corner until one of them found an unlocked door. He opens it, quickly pulling you inside before slamming it shut. Your body is shaking, you can't help but sob. You never in a million years expected today to turn out how it has. 

Both the men quickly jump into action, grabbing whatever heavy pieces of furniture they can find to shove against the door. You watch them, still feeling just pure shock. 

"I'm sorry." You whisper. You weren't even entirely sure what you were sorry about but it felt appropriate in the moment. 

They both stop covering the door, staring at you. “Sorry for what?” One asks. 

“I.. I'm not sure. But you're in this mess now because of me.” You sigh. 

“We're in this because we didn't want to see an innocent woman get taken advantage of by some fucked up men. You didn't start it.” He says. 

“What's your name?” The other asks. 

"Y/N." You sniffle. 

“I’m Wooyoung, and this is San.” 

“Nice to meet you both. And thank you. I truly don't know what would have happened if you guys didn't save me.” 

“It's nothing.” San says, giving you a half smile. He could not stop staring at you, just like when you were in the visiting room with your dad and he had caught your eye. 

Before you could say anything back, the knob to the door started to shake. There's pounding at the door, and that's when you hear it. 

“Y/N.” your dad calls. “Y/N please let me in. They're coming.” He cries. “Please.” 

You run to the door, trying your best to move everything they had put against the door. 

“Y/N stop.” Wooyoung yells, trying to pull you away. 

“Please!” You cry. “Please help me. That's my dad, we need to let him in.” 

San and Wooyoung loom at each other. They both know this is a bad idea but knew that there would be no chance of you letting up. 

“Whatever happens?” San says. Wooyoung nods his head. 

“Whatever happens.” 

The two men help you pull the large filing cabinet, desk and other heavy things away from the door. You unlock the deadbolt, ripping the door open, the smile on your face falling immediately. 

“I'm sorry Y/N. I'm so sorry.” He cries. He's pushed inside the room by the three men from before. He trips, falling to the floor with a thud. You wanted to go to him but the man has a gun now and it's pointed directly at you. 

“You two aren't very good at hiding.” He chuckles. 

“Eric, you don't have to do this.” Wooyoung says, his hands up as he inches towards you. 

“Fuck you, Woo. You'd be the fucking same if you were locked in the hole for months at a time.” Eric snaps. “And now I have a chance for something real and you two are trying to ruin it for me.” 

“I'm telling you not to fucking do this.” San snaps. He can see Eric eyeing you up, your dad laying on the floor, one of Eric's men's feet pinning him down. 

“You think I'm gonna listen to you?” Eric laughs. “Just enjoy the show.” He says, grabbing onto Your wrists. Wooyoung and San try to lurch forward but they're stopped by the other two, flashing their knives. Eric pushes you against the wall, pulling you back towards him. He pulls you to the ground, climbing on top of you, straddling you. The gun is still shoved in your face. You say nothing, tears just stream down your face. Your eyes dart in-between San and Wooyoung as you silently plead for one of them to do something. To help you. 

Eric rips open your shirt, exposing your bra. You look away, seeing Wooyoung and San nod towards each other. They both lunge for the men, knocking them down. Your dad scrambles to his feet taking over for San, as he runs for Eric, who was too in his own world with you to hear anything else. San tackles him, causing Eric to let go of the gun, it slides across the floor. Eric scrambles beneath San as he delivers hit after hit. 

“Everybody get on the fucking ground.” You hear. Smoke bombs thrown into the room. Guards in full tactical gear flood inside, guns at the ready. San gets off of Eric, all of them men laying on the floor. “Hands on your head.” They yell. 

You do as you're told. “We have a hostage located.” They go to you first, helping you up. You're coughing loudly as they guide you out of the room, into another one to be treated. They'd finally gotten everything settled down and started getting inmates back into their cells, or medical treatment. 

“You took a fucking hostage, the warden is deciding your punishment.” A guard snaps at Wooyoung and San as they escort them past the room you're in. You push the nurse away, running out of the room. 

“Wait!” You yell. “They didn't take me hostage. They saved me from him.” You say, pointing to Eric. “He tried to.. he tried to...” You cry. “They protected me from him and I'll forever be grateful.” you finish. You walk over to the two handcuffed men, wrapping your arms around both of them, until they're both escorted off. Both of them looking over their shoulders, giving you a smile and a wink. 

Once you were checked out by the nurse and cleared to go, you were led out to the front where your mom was waiting for you. You sobbed into her shoulder as she hugged you tightly, apologizing to you profusely. She grabbed your hand, pulling you out to the car. you look back at the prison as she drives away, silently thanking Wooyoung and San for saving you. You'd have to find some way to properly thank them sometime. 

“Do you want to tell me what happened?” Your mom asks. 

“Dad and I were talking when fights broke out. Inmates were attacking guards and other inmates.” You sigh. “They opened the doors to the visitation room to let guards in but inmates rushed in.. one gut I guess had his sights set on me.” 

“Dad protected you right?” Your mom asks. 

“He tried. But there were 3 of them and one of him.. they took him away. And I was alone.” You look over at your mom, she has tears in her eyes as she listens to you. “But then two men rushed in and grabbed me, helped me escape. Took me to a room and barricaded the door.” 

“They didn't hurt you did they?” She whispers. 

“No mom, they didn't. Dad started banging on the door.. they helped me move everything and open the door but the bad guy was there with him, they pushed him in.. the guy tried to.. r..” you pause. Your mom looks horrified. “He didn't. Wooyoung and San tackled him and then the guards came in.” 

“That was extremely lucky that they were there for you.” She sighs. “I'm so sorry baby.” 

“It's not your fault mom. You didn't know that was going to happen.” You say. “No one could have predicted that would happen.” 

The rest of the way you drive home in silence. You really want to just go to bed. Luckily you didn't have to work today so you could do just that. As you walked in the house, your brother Jaehyun rushed to you, hugging you tightly. “I'm so glad you're okay.” He says, squeezes you even harder. 

“I won't be if you squeeze me anymore, you're gonna suffocate me.” You half chuckle, half panic. He lets you go, patting your back before heading back to the living room. 

“Do you want some lunch?” Your mom asks. You raise an eyebrow. You had assumed she would have had to go back to work. 

“Don't you have to go back to work?” You ask. She looks at the ground. 

“Uh, well.. Dave said if I left to go to you, I wouldn't have a job. It's not worth it if he won't let me go to my child who was in the middle of a prison riot. Don't worry, I'll find something else.” She smiles. 

Fuck Dave. You went up to your room, crawled in your bed and quickly fell asleep. The day was exhausting and you were still shook a week later. It was the week after the riot, and you had been answering everyone's questions about what happened, what it was like the guys who saved you. It was the talk of the town still but you were tired of talking about it. You were ready to forget about it now, which is why you agreed so fast when your friend Hwasa asked you to go out that night. There was a newish club that was apparently very exclusive and the two of you wanted in. You got ready in a hurry, doing your makeup and your hair the best you could. You slipped on your favorite club dress as well as shoes and headed for the front door. 

“I'm going out, bye!” You yell, slamming the door behind you. You run down the driveway heading to Hwasa's car. 

The drive to the club is long. When you finally see it, you're mesmerized. It's bigger than you imagined, the bright sign outside reads Ateez. You were so excited. The line was extremely long, and as you walked up to the bouncer he shooed you to the back of the line. It seemed like you were never going to get in. 

After about twenty minutes, you noticed a man staring at you that was walking the line, he walked past you, before backing up to look at you again. 

“L/N Y/N?” He asks, eyeing you up and down. 

“Yes?” You respond, staring at the handsome man. 

“Come with me.” He says, motioning for you and Hwasa to follow him. You and Hwasa look at each other, she shrugs her shoulders, following the man and dragging you along behind. He stops at the bouncer, pointing to you. “L/N Y/N. Add her to the list. VIP.” He finishes, bringing you both inside. What the hell did you do to get this sort of treatment? 

The two of you walk behind the man, following him really without any questions. You pass what looks like the main bar, the dance floor and head up some stairs. The rope is removed from the hook, letting the three of you into the VIP area. 

“You can stay here if you'd like. Your drinks are all on the house, whatever you'd like. If you need anything, my name is Mingi, don't hesitate to ask.” He says. 

“Um, I do have a question.” You say, slightly raising your hand. “How? Um, why? And um what?” You say. 

Mingi chuckles. “You helped my brothers out, by not adding time to their sentences. They both could have gotten a lot more time after that riot. But they didn't, because of you. So from now on, if you are in trouble or need anything, you have 8 men who will happily help you out.” He says. “Well 6 for now, until San and Woo get out.” 

“All I did was tell the truth.” You say.

“There's a lot of women out there who would have lied, knowing who those two are.” He says. 

 “Also, You're related to them?” You ask, ignoring what he said before. You were too busy trying to stop your mouth from hanging down. 

“Well.. in a sense.” He laughs. “Enjoy your night.” He finishes before leaving the room. 

“What the hell!” Hwasa shouts, heading over to your private bar. She orders multiple drinks and shots for each of you to be brought to your table. As you two sit there, listening to the music the DJ is playing, drinking and just having a good time you see five men walk into the room. They stop, staring at you. As they walk over they introduce themselves. 

“Y/N.” One smiles. “I'm Seonghwa, this is Yeosang, Yunho, Jongho and Hongjoong.” He says pointing to each extremely handsome man. 

“Nice to meet you.” You smile back, waving at them all while hiccuping in the process. 

“Thank you for what you did for Woo and San.” Seonghwa says. 

“Like I said to Mingi, I was just telling the truth. I didn't want them to get into trouble for saving me.” You explain. 

“If you need anything, and I mean anything, don't hesitate to call.” He says, sliding you a piece of paper. Written down are 8 phone numbers for you. This was honestly fucking surreal. Who knew this could happen for simply telling the truth? 

The men walk away and Hwasa stares at you in disbelief. “I almost wish it was me that day.” She laughs. “Let's go dance!” She says, trying to pull you up. 

“Let me just tidy these glasses.” You slur, stacking all the cups and shot glasses to bring back to the bartender. He laughs as you place them on the bar, and thanks you through his chuckles. 

You let Hwasa drag you down the stairs to the dance floor, immediately sliding her hands all over your body as you dance closely. The two of you always preferred to dance together, but sometimes if you were into it you'd dance with men.  This time you were too into dancing with Hwasa, you didn't want any men to disturb you. You turned around, grinding your ass into her as you looked around the club. You glanced up at the balcony and saw six men leaning on the railing, all their eyes staring directly at you. Why did you feel like your life was going to get a lot more interesting? 

[lochrannn]

Sending this ask to a few tua accounts!

Diegolila is probably my favorite ship in the show, but I've been thinking about this a lot lately. What would you change about their relationship in season 4? Obviously they're not in the honeymoon phase anymore, and they have three kids, so I feel like naturally they would go through a rough patch. But what made me sad in season 4 was that none of it got fixed. The five/lila relationship aside, it was weird to see Lila be just completely disconnected from Diego and not come to any realizations about her relationship with him, especially because she IS a deep character and she really does love him. Plus, I don't completely agree with her being a housewife either. It hurts to see them fight and stuff because I feel like they're 2 characters who are really in sync with each other and who make each other better people, but it hurt a lot more when their arcs ended in them basically not really loving each other anymore.

TLDR how would you rewrite their relationship in season 4? Would Lila still be a housewife/Diego a delivery driver? Who would try to fix the relationship first? Why would the relationship go through the rough patch in the first place? Is it because they're both just tired of each other/suburban life/kids? Or is it something else? Would they try to fix it in the first place?

Sorry this is a really long ask, but I love all your tua takes and I feel like they ripped off Diego and Lila in the worst way this season. Would love to know your thoughts.

Sorry, this took me a while to get to but it's an interesting ask!

There is a small issue I'm having though and that's that I'm sort of answering some of that questoin in the fic I'm writing, and, while that might sound self-indulgent, I don't wanna spoil it XD

That being said, I think I can definitely think about some of the specifics you're asking about.

In terms of how, in general, could one do something with the fact that after 6 years and 3 kids with no fun up relationship in which they could have properly got to know each other ahead of time and that probably causes some issues down the road, I had actually started planning out a fic about a year ago and then never wrote it and now won't as I'm using some stuff in the fic I am writing.

My initial plan also included Lila starting to sneak and withdrawing but instead of cheating it turns out she's been drawn in by the commissoin, some alt version of the Handler who has her convinced that the Diego she's living with is not her Diego... listen, I was going to work out the time travel/time line mechanics later, basically I was trying to get to a Mr & Mrs Smith (the movie) style blow out fight that ends with them smooching.

What I'm saying is, with how volitile their relationship has always been, making them not be all functional is a logical step in the story telling, I take no issue with that. But previous precedent had always been that they care enough to try and find a messy way back to being together, that whatever else, that's more important to them, and just taking that completely away is what bugs me most.

Anyway, to your specific questions: there's a lot of people headcanoning Diego as a stay at home dad, and I guess, yeah, possible, but I think he's a bit to feral for that and on that note, so i Lila, so I would have them both have meh jobs that they hate their bosses at and part of what has caused strain on the relationship is that they are both endlessly busy and find no eral time for each other. (Which also leads to a way to resolve this issue in decent communication and them making an effort to be a couple again).

I have in the past written some fics where I immagined them as a family living the suburban life and Lila finding it...trying... but in my head, she would treat it like a mission, do both the best job she can at it, while basically trying as hard as possible to infiltrate every element of this unfamiliar world and then for some shits and giggles, sow some benign chaos.

Diego being Dad with a mustache and too much care for his van and telling people to take their shoes off in his home tracks. I have no notes. Other than the weird bits where they made him say the words claiming he resents this life but then make him good at it and seem pretty happy, I think they nailed Dad Diego. Shame they made him miserable on puprose, but I digress.

I really enjoyed the first four episodes because I was convinced Diego and Lila would both learn something and want to be together again, I don't think that is trite, I think that is how adult relationships go some times. Lila.... well....

Thanks for the ask!

I haven't been posting much about my thoughts on the season because they are quite jumbled and I'm not pushed to go back and watch it again (which is a real fucking shame, but here we are) to try and sort some details out.

What are your thoughts?

[ripplestitchskein]

How The Boys handled Hughie’s multiple and traumatizing sexual assaults is a really good example of realism being superseded by authorial intent and why you cannot always apply realistic standards of behavior or definitions of trauma etc to fictional works, worlds, or characters.

While it rankles our real world sensibilities, and the implications are rather horrifying it is often either part of the world building, ignorance on the writer’s part, an accepted problematic trope or pastiche, or something that will be explored later. In this case I didn’t get the impression it was the latter. The character implications it has as far as reactions/blame/support go would be interesting to explore, it certainly changes how I view Annie and their relationship and not to the good, but they did not signal that is a route they are going to go. They largely played both situations as a joke so as the audience you are left with the age old “Do I accept this as it is presented or should I look elsewhere”.

Honestly the writing this season was extremely poor and all over the place as a whole. I find the show rather disgusting and over the top in general but it did have some really compelling characters with interesting arcs. I enjoy the world building and attention to detail, and there are really good things to be mined from it but this season really played into the worst parts of the show and many of the individual character storylines fell completely flat, were rushed through, didn’t make a lot of sense, or were so back and forth I needed a weathervane to see where they would end up in any given episode since none of their decisions seemed to be based in previous experience or characterization.

The two things I enjoyed: A-Train, I think they have done a fantastic job with that character from the start. Like probably top character arc in my opinion. I have very few notes on him, it’s been wonderfully done.

Kimiko and Frenchie. Not most of it, I hated the Colin storyline, I hated the Kimiko storyline this season too. But I have wanted them together since S1 so I guess I’ll take these scraps, thanks. Overall it was terribly done, there was virtually no signaling they were going that direction after the shift to platonic friends in the previous season, their disparate storylines were supposed to feed into that build up but fell incredibly flat. It felt very much like Kimiko did a 180, going from pushing Frenchie to be with Colin from a place of genuinely supportive friendship to “actually I only wanted you with him because I didn’t think I was good enough” with zero indication she felt that way until she actually says it out loud for the audience. It was played the entire time like she was missing her friend, not that she had romantic feelings for him. And Frenchie similarly acted as if he was in no way thinking of Kimiko during that entire storyline, so for him to just accept everything was so odd to me. The Colin thing, while I appreciated seeing Merlin’s ass and that handsome smile again, was stupid and pointless and was so disconnected from what we’ve seen of Frenchie so far I still don’t see the point of it beyond “We need something for Frenchie to do until we need him for the virus storyline”.

That’s honestly a problem I had with everyone’s storylines this season. It was a lot of “sit on this shelf until we call you out for your moment” without any cohesion. I imagine this was largely due to scheduling issues or other real life logistical concerns but it doesn’t change that the writing itself was so bad.

[purplelea]

Do you feel like kariya is a good person to look up to? Like I know day 4 happened but that's like the worst thing he did. And I honestly can't be mad because that "hello, villain? Screwing with you is my job." Line just hits me weird. I'm tempted to write a fic but I dunno

Now that is an interesting question. I see what you mean by "day 4 is the worst thing he did" but that's actually the only thing we see. And while that's the most nefarious action he took, that's the only one we saw, but he's been a Reaper for so long that he most likely erased hundreds of not thousands of players before. Is Kariya an overall good person? No, I don't think so.

But, as you said, "it's his job". Here we fall into the morals of the Reaper's Game and I'm afraid I'm not qualified enough to judge. But I can offer some ideas anyway.

What's the job of a Harrier Reaper? It's not to mindlessly erase Players to rack up points and rise up the ranks as Uzuki seems to believe. Kariya sees further: he knows that the Reapers (Harriers, Supports, Officers...) all have the common goal of helping to judge which Players are worth reviving. It's not about erasing them all, it's about putting up obstacles that will make them grow (for instance, erasing Rhyme was the way to help Beat grow, wasn't it?) and erasing those who are not strong enough to survive. It follows the basic rule of the Reaper's Game which is the survival of the fittest.

Now that rule can obviously be contested in many ways, as it is directly contested mulstiples times during twewy directly, and by Neku himself, who believes that all Players should live again. So there's mutiples questions here: do you agree with the survival of the fittest? If not, do you believe that because someone is asked to do something, then that takes away their responsibility in the actions taken (it's "just his job")?

I don't have any idea on how to answer those questions. Just food for thought!

But on the other hand, Kariya can be looked up to on some subjects. He knows what matters to him (Shibuya) and he's willing to risk his life for it (for instance, going against Shiba or helping Beat and Neku in week three of the og). There's many other steps he takes in order to protect Shibuya (finding the source of the Taboo Noise, trying to find out what Joshua's deal is, fighting against the Plague Noise on his own to protect the RG inhabitants from it...) which clash with his "lazy" personality and show that he can definitely give his all for something as long as it matters enough to him. That man got his priorities straight, I can admire that.

I wouldn't say that he likes to help people because we don't see him do it that often. I believe he's doing it with the same goal in mind that he has for everything else he does: Shibuya's well-being. He helps out Beat to grow because that's what the Game is about, and same for Rindo, because he knows that having people who win the Game and get revived is a good thing for the city thanks to the influence they will have on it (see Shiki's influence through Gatto Nero!).

In the end, to answer your question... it depends on what you believe in. Nobody's perfect, and there's definitely people worse than Kariya to look up to. But it's important to be aware of what his morals are, because of course he's very much a grey character when it comes to those.

[cowlovely]

best nuwho episodes to show to someone who has never seen doctor who, but wants to get into it*

*i’m working off of very specific criteria here. this can’t just be another “best episodes” list, because an episode being good doesn’t necessarily mean it would make a good introduction to a series. for this reason, there will probably be very few episodes past s6 or so on here, as i feel like that’s around the time that many doctor who episodes become too steeped in the show’s own history/overarching plotlines to make the most effective starting points (definitely at least partially moffat’s fault lol)

1x01 rose — maybe too obvious a choice, but this episode is the pilot for a reason.

—pros: does a very good job establishing nuwho’s version of the doctor, as well as thoroughly and effectively introducing us to rose and her life; the autons are a good and fun choice for the first threat.

—cons: is definitely not AS good as some other episodes of the show, so maybe not the best if you only have one episode to show someone and you want to make the most of it

1x06 dalek

—pros: establishes one of Thee enemies of the series, demonstrates 9 and rose’s values, sets up/explains a bit of the time war in an easy to understand way, has a great emotional core

—cons: i genuinely can’t think of any

1x09/1x10 the empty child/the doctor dances

—pros: fabulous storytelling all around with plot, themes, and pacing, emotional but with a happy ending, great blending of tone throughout, and a complete standalone story

—cons: it’s always a bit of a risk to start with a two parter

2x04 the girl in the fireplace

—pros: great creature design, fun storytelling devices, pretty self contained as far as references/lore go, fantastic performances from everyone but especially from sophia myles

—cons: has some of steven moffat’s worst writing attributes, including 10 feeling out of character in several spots, and reinette being very clearly a Moffat Woman in many ways (though this is in my opinion somewhat saved by myles’ great acting)

2x08/2x09 the impossible planet/the satan pit — i really debated putting these ones on here, but this story was MY introduction to the series so. clearly it’s very effective

—pros: really immersive story and setting, great cast of guest characters/actors, another self contained story (as far as i remember), introduces the ood

—cons: another two parter, might be a bit intense as a first story for some people, 10 and rose’s dynamic/significant moments in this might not hit the same way for someone who hasn’t seen other episodes

3x01 smith and jones

—pros: new companion episode, so the audience gets things explained to them at the same time as martha, fun little mystery at the center, interesting conflict/non-antagonist antagonists, good chemistry between tennant and agyeman, the hole rose left emotionally can be felt but doesn’t cut into the story as much as it does in the runaway bride

—cons: is again maybe not one of the standout episodes of the whole series (but is still very solid)

3x03 gridlock — might be a bit controversial since i didn’t include new earth, but i’ll explain

—pros: really interesting setting and plot, and while i think seeing new earth first gives interesting context, i don’t think it’s necessary to enjoy or understand what’s happening in this episode, and it’s kind of cool to come at this one from martha’s pov. showcases a lot of different kind of creatures/people, has a really satisfying and emotional conclusion, has the doctor reintroduce the concept of gallifrey and what happened to it

—cons: could definitely have some confusing elements if you haven’t seen new earth, in particular novice hame and the face of boe, and the effect of the city being the way it is in gridlock could be a bit diminished without the context of 2x01

3x10 blink

—pros: considered to be one of if not the best episode of the series, and with good reason. carey mulligan KILLS it, the mystery is incredibly compelling from start to finish, and the weeping angels are undoubtedly one of the best additions to the series. this episode is crafted damn near perfectly

—cons: while this episode is incredible, i don’t think it’s actually the best possible intro to the show that many people think it is; it’s not a good microcosm of the show as a whole in terms of structure and tone, and the doctor is really hardly in this episode at all. it makes the episode really gripping and intriguing if you’re already familiar with the show, but i actually think that effect is slightly dulled if you’re somebody who isn’t. this doesn’t mean that it would necessarily be the WORST introduction to the show (i’m still including it on the list after all), but i also don’t think it’s the best

4x08/4x09 silence in the library/forest of the dead

—pros: do i have to keep mentioning the episodes are really good? anyway these are really good. really highlights donna’s complexities, story is tense and emotional and intellectually engaging all at once, introduces river/touches on relationship dynamics with a time traveler, great and genuinely scary monster

—cons: another two parter, river’s introduction and the emotional weight of her and 10’s dynamic might not hit the same if you don’t know the doctor as a character either, and the same goes for donna’s plotline in these episodes (it was really difficult in general to pick ANY donna episodes because so many of the ones that feature her are really tied up in series lore of some kind 😭)

4x10 midnight

—pros: genuinely SO brilliantly written, acted, and edited it is ACTUALLY crazy. i’m biased because this is my favorite episode of the series, but i really think it’s such an all around tight story, and definitely one of the more self-contained ones of the show (especially considering this is a one-off monster we don’t even really hear about afterwards, let alone see again). and really i cannot hype up the writing and acting in this episode enough—if you’re really into sociology as a focal point in your sci-fi this episode will be for you

—cons: kind of similar to blink in that this episode isn’t very emblematic of what the show normally is—both in its bottle setting and the fact that the doctor is totally solo for the majority of the runtime, which is not the norm. i love it, and i think it works really well for the episode, but it’s still an outlier (the tone is also more serious than most eps). and also as minor as they are, there are still a few lore moments/references that might be confusing if this were someone’s first episode (rose’s face coming through on the bus screen, for example)

5x01 the eleventh hour

—pros: new doctor, and similar to smith and jones in the new companion factor. great story, episode is filled with lots of great energy, and this really showcases some of moffat’s better attributes as a writer/showrunner, particularly the kind of fairytale vibe he brings to doctor who; first episode of nuwho with a new showrunner, so it kind of intentionally comes off as a bit of a soft reboot

—cons: while it IS a bit like a soft reboot, this is one that kind of rolls with the assumption that you sort of know the deal at this point when it comes to the doctor as a character. i wouldn’t say it’s necessarily confusing, but i could see it potentially being a bit annoying for a new viewer, or just not as effective as an episode. also this was made in 2010 by moffat, and it shows (the sherlock editing, in particular)

5x02 the beast below

—pros: continuing the fairytale vibe, engaging setting and mystery, absolutely heartbreaking in the best way possible, self-contained story

—cons: viewer might feel a bit lost if they don’t know anything about the doctor and amy or how they met. kind of pro british monarchy :/

5x08/5x09 the hungry earth/cold blood

—pros: introduces the silurians (to nuwho at least), has really good guest characters/dynamics, conflict is compelling and very nuanced (feels closer to a classic who episode if that’s something that compels you), and this is something i’ve refrained from mentioning so far, but these episodes in particular have absolutely fantaaaaaastic makeup/SFX, costuming, and production design

—cons: two parter (take a shot every time i say this), the dramatic conclusion of this one might be confusing and/or fall flat if you aren’t familiar with amy and rory or the overarching plot of the season, and i could definitely see some people finding these episodes boring with all the political talk (i definitely did as a kid)

6x09 night terrors

—pros: very self-contained (as far as i can remember), perfectly straddles the line of horror and sci-fi, has a good emotional core, and 11 with kids is almost always an a+ for me

—cons: honestly can’t really think of any? again maybe not like. an AMAZING episode, and it may have references to past episodes/events in it that i can’t remember that might be confusing to a new viewer

6x11 the god complex

—pros: GREAAATTTT episode hook that really quickly and effectively drops you into the setting and overall vibe of the episode, some great one off characters, encompasses a lot of doctor who’s themes and different blends of genre

—cons: the second half of the episode pretty significantly focuses on amy and her fears/insecurities related to the doctor, so much so that it almost made me not include this episode

7x07 the rings of akhaten

—pros: this episode is so good. great intro to clara’s character (despite it not being her first one), great setting, great alien designs + worldbuilding, great music, and oh my GOD the monologues…the damn monologues…chef’s kiss

—cons: the doctor’s monologue probably won’t have the same effect for a new viewer that it does for people who are already fans, but honestly it’s so good that i don’t think this is that big a deal

9x03/9x04 under the lake/before the flood

—pros: very similar vibes to the impossible planet/the satan pit, but honestly i think i’m even more compelled by this story than i was by that one. i LOVE all the moving parts in this, i love the characters, i love that we’re underwater, and i love that it’s GHOSTS!!

—cons: two parter (shot!), and specifically a two parter that—while i love it to bits—drags a bit more than other two parters that i’ve included on this list. a new viewer may also not totally get (or maybe even be put off by?) 12 and clara’s dynamic

10x01 the pilot

—pros: i’ll be honest i wouldn’t say this is one of my FAVORITE episodes or anything, but it’s still very solid, and i DO think it could make a good introduction into the series for someone

—cons: has multiple allusions to other characters/arcs that will probably feel kind of weird to a new viewer

eve of the daleks special

—pros: time loop lovers come get your juice!!! this episode fucks, it’s probably my favorite from chibnall’s era? top three at least for sure. features the daleks without being too steeped in the Lore/having them overshadow everything in the episode

—cons: this episode is an atypical structure flr the show, and is kind of like. is About 13 and yaz’s relationship, which will probably be kind of odd if you haven’t seen any of the show before

honorable mentions, aka episodes i really wanted to include, but which had one too many cons to justify: 1x02 the end of the world, 1x08 father’s day, 2x01 new earth, s3 xmas special the runaway bride, 3x08/3x09 human nature/the family of blood, s4 special the waters of mars, 5x07 amy’s choice, 5x10 vincent and the doctor, 5x11 the lodger, 6x04 the doctor’s wife, 6x05/6x06 the rebel flesh/the almost people, 6x10 the girl who waited, 10x10 the eaters of light, 11x06 demons of the punjab, 12x08 the haunting of villa diodati, 60th special wild blue yonder)

that’s it so far!! i may add onto this when we get more episodes with 15, we’ll see!

(also i promise i’m not as biased towards early seasons nuwho as this list implies, i was just trying to be as objective as i could possibly be with the criteria that i set 😭 (while obviously still being subjective to my opinions) a lot of the later seasons just don’t have very many easy entry points 😔 (which is i’m sure at least partly why the show is being soft rebooted with 15))

[woodswolf]

Me before attempting to write Olimar again, one year ago: "Okay, this'll be interesting. Writing a character who isn't severely fucked up on two or five levels (but will be by the time I'm done with him). This will be nice a little experiment for myself."

Me now, having catapulted down the character study rabbit hole as I tend to: "Oh dear god, wait a minute: this guy is as deeply fucked up on the level of whom I usually write for! And I don't think that was my fault for once! I've been deceived! What the fuck?!"

(TL;DR: Your tags and ramblings made me Think, thank you. I'm certain you are having a blast tearing him to shreds in some terrible way I've yet to think of myself lol.)

(RE: all of this shit probably)

i have only really truly known this guy for a bit over a year and every little bit ive learned about him has only pushed me ever deeper into this endless well of fascination with whatever the fuck is wrong with him. this guy is a pathological liar as a method of self-soothing. who DOES that. how the fuck did he arrive in this scenario.

really when you get down to it olimar is like, perhaps one of the most depressed characters of all time, it's just that he's carefully crafted a presentation of symptoms that very cleverly hides this from both the audience and himself. this guy is literally miserable. he viscerally hates his boss and is frustrated with his coworkers where they're even relevant. he has somewhere in the range of mixed feelings on his job but generally wishes that it allowed him more time with his family. his family, which has so many undeniable problems it's difficult to even list them. where to start: his kids? his wife? his parents? every happy memory he has involves his family and most of those memories are brief glimpses at Connection that otherwise seems so absent from the rest of his life. he's a middle-aged man with a house and a yard and a wife and two-kids-and-a-dog and probably a white picket fence for good measure. he's ticking all the boxes that he was raised* to think were a one-way ticket to happiness. so why is he still so lonely? why isn't he happy? what is this general malaise that's hanging over his entire life? what's wrong with him?

(*whether or not he was actually raised on a variant of the american dream is a really interesting question but honestly not relevant here. there's a lot of interesting evidence in his logs supporting something more nuanced, but again. irrelevant)

and olimar's answer is that Actually! there's Nothing wrong! he's perfectly fine and perfectly happy and perfectly satisfied with everything in his life. nothing is wrong and he's perfectly happy and even if he weren't (which he is!!!!) he still has so many things that would make up for it. he has so many good memories that are just his that he can hold on to as hard as he possibly can for as long as he needs to until he feels better. he can write them down and read them back as a reminder until it sticks in his brain that He Is Happy. There Is Nothing Wrong. He Is Happy And There Is Nothing Wrong. because he did everything right, didn't he!! he made his choices and for the all the love of everything he holds dear he is going to stick by them. because he needs to. because if he doesn't, where would he even be?

and then this guy has the worst "vacation" of his entire life (DEFINITELY another blatant self-soothing lie btw, you CANNOT convince me that this guy would spend any more time away from his family than he absolutely has to what with his career) and the cracks actually kind of start to show. because he is very quickly launched into the worst series of circumstances he's ever experienced. and through it all he's just!! completely fucking Normal about it!! utterly fucking accepting of any outcome that happens to him because he doesn't feel like he really has any control. like he ever had any control. he should have fucking died. even before the thirty days are up he's just passively accepting of whatever happens. there are tons and tons of treasure descriptions or other entries where he expresses very explicit passive suicidality through things that could be jokes or offhand comments but really don't read like that. pikmin 1's entry for day 29 reads more like a reminder that he should at least try to not let himself die than an earnest attempt to actually do so.

and it's like, if he does survive pikmin 1, what does he even win? ever-increasing stakes at his job and ever-fewer ways to pretend that everything's fine. an ever-brighter flashing neon sign reading QUIT YOUR FUCKING JOB that he has to try increasingly hard to ignore. the job that keeps sending him back to the planet that almost killed him. the job that keeps sending him back to the planet where he barely survived by only his wits and the skin of his teeth. the job that keeps sending him back to the planet where he will die, because no one was supposed to save olimar.

and through it all you can see! you can SEE the way he gets increasingly stressed out as things go along. but he's still just going along trying his damnedest to pretend that everything is fine and he is happy and he doesn't need any help, that he shouldn't be trying to make an exit as quickly as he can and to maybe ask his wife to pick up a job so they can be a dual-income household now that their kids are a bit older. he doesn't need to be looking for anything better because he has the best he's going to get right here, and isn't that wonderful? shouldn't that make him happy?

and it's like, the way things are going he's never going to get there, and on some level he knows that. but olimar's whole fucking deal is that if he can't solve something he's going to throw himself at the problem over and over until either it gets solved or his skull splits open, a pattern that is only reenforced by the events of pikmin 1 and 2 and 3. so he knows that he's never going to be happy, but he's going to try this impossible task of being happy over and over until he either fakes it till he makes it or something kills him. so far it hasn't worked out for him, but maybe the NEXT time he blows up at somebody for no reason because he just can't take the stress of it all anymore!

as it turns out i have no idea how to end this, so on a tangentially related note: olimar is not a biologist by any standard and i will die on this hill. ALL of his piklopedia entries are creative writing exercises and i can ALMOST prove this. but that's a whole other post honestly. just kind of adds to the whole thing about how much olimar lies to the reader and himself.

[gibblegabber]

i wrote most of this a month ago but might as well spill my personal nonsense regarding kick on his 14TH ANNIVERSARY WHHHHHHHH

nothing interesting it’s truly like a diary entry

i’ve been keeping to myself while i wind down from another hyperfixation with KB:SD, because it has to come to an end, because there’s very few people left in my life who were there in the fandom while it aired, because i get so fucking depressed when i think about it.

how do i describe this. Kick reminds me that i’m alive. he ALSO reminds me that i’m a failure. he’s the reason i finished art school and also (part of) the reason i stopped pursuing art as a career. the show’s run was the best time of my life and at the same time i was dealing with an overwhelming amount of trauma.

and i packed ALL of that into this silly 6.5/10 rated cartoon. why??? because it just happened to be THERE when I was going thru some shit?? sometimes i think “this could have been any cartoon, the timing is what mattered” and other times i’m like no…the adventures we had in mellowbrook were genuinely incredible and if it were any other fandom, i wouldn’t have met the same amazing people!!! do you know how thankful i am to have Kachiimi and Misha in my life still??? REALLY FUCKING THANKFUL. i don’t deserve them in the least!! they’ve known me at my worst and happened to also SEE me at my worst in person and they’re still my friends and i love them very much, i hope they know that.

and if anyone’s still following me that knew me during the KB years, or was friends with me during that time… 1.) i’m sorry. i was crazy LMAO and 2.) just know you made the whole experience so so awesome :) i appreciated so much that the fandom was a tight knit group of people, no drama, just a great place to be when my life was falling apart around me.

yea if i psychoanalyzed this whole thing i wouldn’t like the answer. but. it doesn’t change how much Kick means to me, and how much he’ll always mean to me!!

it had always been a bucket list thing of mine to be the number 1 fan of something at some point. ever since i was like nine years old i was like “man that’d be cool if it happened”. never in a million years would i have guessed that it would be this. but in a weird way Kick was exactly who i needed at that time. someone whose failures were just his fuel for success. someone who didn’t let his shortcomings stop him from achieving his goals. someone who kept going even if the world was against him. looking back it’s really no surprise that i got so attached.

obviously i’m far from the number 1 fan position now. who knows if i ever really was; i only knew a fraction of the fandom that called me the “queen of the KB fandom”, and Sandro had called me the number 1 fan at one point so i just took it all to heart. i would argue that Aisha took that position when school and jobs and life started consuming my life more than fandom did. or well, all of this is a moot point when you consider Jackie who is definitely 100% his number 1 fan LOL. but wow, what a time. we were so lucky to interact with the crew as much as we did.

it doesn’t seem like much but it really made me feel like i could do anything. if Kick had gotten a third season you KNOW i would’ve stopped at NOTHING to be on the team in some way shape or form. i would’ve flown out to LA in an instant and not looked back. despite everything. i would’ve done it.

kinda sucks considering uhhhh THINGS that got revealed about the director years later, so in the same vein i’m very happy that Kick did not get a season 3. but when the show ended something in me died, or i came to terms with something, idk what it was. something like: i knew i’d never feel the same way about a cartoon again so i didn’t bother trying. i stopped drawing almost entirely for 10 years.

aaaand it’s true. over a decade and i never came close to the level of obsession i had with Kick, and never really wanted to either. THEN i got slapped in the face with IZ and well…let that be a long and cheesy post for march 30th or something. :P and as much fun as it’s been and continues to be, it’s a DIFFERENT sort of experience from KB. it can’t compare. maybe in 10 years i’ll look back on IZ friends and fandom times and reminisce fondly on them too.

KB:SD is stuck where it was. if that makes any sense. there’s a lot in the show that i don’t think modern day fandom would take kindly to. there’s a lot of crack shipping and shenanigans we got up to back then that isn’t okay now. (god… okay i don’t miss that part LOL. i cringe painfully at a lot of it, but i DO miss when people understood the fucking difference between fiction and reality. it was a different time for sure.) it just is what it is.

and that’s okay. i’m gonna let it go, again, and i’ll be back on and off. it hurts. it hurts every time this happens but that’s okay because Kick taught us to live till it hurts. :) 🤘🏼✨

[downwiththeficness]

The Usurper-Chapter Ten

Summary: Lilah McNamara stole things for a living. It was tedious work and often dangerous, which made it just exciting enough to keep her interested. After botching a routine job, Lilah finds herself standing amid monsters. Wholly unprepared for the horror of living under Amaru’s reign, Lilah decides to use her well honed skills to thwart the queen’s plans and prevent the end of the world.

Word Count: ~

Disclaimer: I do not consent to this work being copied or posted to other sites of blogs.

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God damn, but Javier had good taste. Lilah frowned at herself in the mirror and tried not to hate the man for his ability to pick outfits that suited her perfectly. Lilah would never have looked twice at the softly draped sheath dress in shell pink. And, she certainly never would have dared to step into the satin pumps that adorned her feet. More than that, she would never have thought to put the two together in a single outfit.

“I look amazing,” she murmured, wondering why it felt like her stomach was turned around in knots. No. She knew exactly the reason, and it wasn’t because she looked good.

This was a date. It was definitely a date. Lilah was going to a bar for drinks with Brasa. He’d even assured her there would be a band. She was dressed up, her hair was done, and she’d put on a little more makeup than normal. Most days, all this effort would be put towards the goal of disarming a mark. But, not tonight. Tonight, Lilah’s effort was to...what? To tempt him? To draw him in? To make him want her?

Lilah had mixed feelings about Brasa on her best days. On her worst, she resented him for putting her in a position that had no good outcome. She’d either spend the rest of her life in the caves, or Amaru would kill her. Lilah wasn’t sure which option was better. Death might be a mercy, given the certainty that she was going to go insane if she spent much more time isolated from the rest of the world. It didn’t matter how much Brasa tried to reassure her, Lilah couldn’t figure out how to get around her biggest hurdle to freedom.

She turned from the mirror, hoping that she could distract herself from the impossibility of her situation with a little alcohol and music loud enough to ring in her ears for hours afterwards. Brasa assured her that she could go out as often as she liked and this was her first attempt to test that theory. It occurred to her that she should try to find an opportunity to run. Brasa was less likely to drag her kicking and screaming back to the car if there were others around to act as witnesses. Less likely didn’t mean that he wasn’t capable. She couldn’t stop thinking about the way Javier talked about the lengths Brasa would go to in order to get her back. To the ends of the earth...

The bedroom door opened and Brasa stepped through. Lilah lifted her brows at him, “Please tell me you’re changing before we leave.”

Brasa looked down at his outfit, much the same as he always wore. Black on black, leather coat and gloves. He hesitated before saying, “Ah, maybe?”

Lilah took a moment to think about how she was going to say the thing that definitely needed to be said, “You can’t go out into public like that.”

Dark brows drew together, “Why?”

She held back a laugh at his genuinely confused expression, “Because people are going to either think you’re some kind of cosplayer or...deeply into BDSM.”

More confusion, “What’s BDSM?”

“That’s probably something you should look up for yourself,” Lilah said quickly. “My point is that you need to blend in a bit.”

The door opened again and Javier hurried inside, “My deepest apologies for intruding, but she’s back.”

“Already?” Brasa drawled, looking unhappy.

“Yes. And, from what I’ve seen so far, her trip was unsuccessful.”

Brasa muttered what sounded like a curse under his breath, “Alright. I’ll deal with her,” he turned to Lilah, “and we’ll go.”

“You’re gonna change first, right?”

He sighed, “What would you like me to wear?”

Lilah shrugged, “Just blend in, okay?”

Javier inched forward, “I have something that might work.”

Javier to the rescue.

“Thank you,” Brasa said. Then, “Let’s get this over with.” To Lilah he added, “Wait here, please.”

Feeling somewhat bewildered, Lilah watched the two of them leave. She stared at the door for a long time, then trudged over to the bed and sat down to wait. Lilah waited, and waited, and waited. She waited so long that she thought the bar might close before they got there. That thought came along with an odd sense of relief. All the pressure of enjoying the next few hours to the fullest for fear that she might not get another chance any time soon lifted. She wouldn’t have to try to make small talk, wouldn’t have to try to be pleasant. Wouldn’t get distracted by his smile. Or his dimples. Or his impossibly brown eyes.

From somewhere far away came a noise. It was small, at first, but the sound grew in volume and force with such speed that Lilah jerked to standing. Staring into the middle distance, she listened hard for something that might tell her just what the fuck that was. The noise paused briefly, then started again with a deafening boom. She rushed to the door and was out in the hall before her brain caught up with her legs. In the dark, she searched for the danger.

It sounded like thunder. How could she hear thunder hundreds of yards underground? Lilah turned her head and looked both ways down the hall—there it was again. Not thunder. More like...a roar. Lilah took a step towards it with a hand lifted, as if to shield herself from attack.

Another roar. Lilah took off running. She blew through the door and into the massive cavern. Her legs stopped cold when she caught Amaru in the process of tearing the head off a person who was fighting for their life. Lilah’s jaw unhinged and she had every intention of screaming, but no sound came out. She’d seen Brasa kill, knew that she was surrounded by blood drinkers, but watching the skin tear apart in real time was sickening.

“My queen,” Brasa said in a cool tone, “was that necessary?”

Amaru dropped the head. It landed with a wet plop at her feet, “She failed me. Like you have failed me.”

Brasa was faced away from her and he hadn’t noticed Lilah was standing there watching. His body was upright and rigid, as if there was a string lifting him from above. Lilah half expected to look down and find his boots hanging an inch or two from the stone floor. On either side, his hands were clenched into fists. “Its going to take time to track down the book, my queen.”

Amaru stared him down and Lilah could feel the anger radiating from her, “I wouldn’t even need the book if I wasn’t stuck in this ridiculously weak body.”

“I understand,” he replied. “Its very frustrating for me, too. But, if you want to open the door, we need the book.”

Amaru didn’t seem at all impressed by Brasa’s measured response. She marched up to him and pointed a finger in his face, “For every day you make me wait, I’ll tear somebody apart. Even though they breed like rabbits, there’s only so many of them. Guess who I’ll come for when I run out.” Brasa’s ‘my queen’ was cut off when Amaru slammed the heel of her palm into his chest and sent him flying. He landed ten feet from where he was standing and stayed there while Amaru sneered, “No more failures.”

Lilah waited for her to disappear before she allowed herself to move. Even then, it was only to bring her hand to her chest. She drew calming breaths while she waited for Brasa to get up. He did, eventually, but his movements were slow. Lilah thought he might actually be hurt, which produced an odd pang that unsettled her. She might not like him very much and she might resent him, but something about watching Amaru toss him around in a fit if pique didn’t sit right.

After dusting himself off, Brasa turned and finally realized she was there. He said her name softly and the two syllables were touched with mortification. Lilah knew what it was like to have someone witness an ass kicking. In some ways just knowing there was another set of eyes in the room made the whole thing even worse.

She straightened her shoulders and smiled, “Tough day at the office?”

Brasa looked down at the head still sitting on the floor, “You could say that.”

“Do you want to reschedule?”

“No,” he answered after a few seconds, “I think getting out of here is a good idea.”

Lilah nodded and gestured towards the body, “Should we...bury her, or something?”

“I’ll ask Javier to care for her,” Brasa replied. “He should—.”

“I’m here,” Javier said as he entered the room with a garment bag over his arm. He looked at the gore below, “I take it the meeting didn’t go well.”

“It didn’t.”

Javier snapped into action, “Take this. Go change. I’ll handle the body. Lady Lilah, if you’ll wait in your room, this will not be easy to watch.”

As if watching her die was easy? Lilah thought, with ire. Followed by, I’ve seen two murders, lately. I wonder how many more there will be. She said, “Sure. I can do that,” while she pushed down the image of Raul’s terrified face.

Brasa reached for her, “Come on.”

Arms crossed over her chest, Lilah let Brasa lead her out of the cavern and down the hall to her room. Once inside, he split off and headed for the bathroom without a word. Lilah found herself once again sitting on the bed, waiting. She folded her hands in her lap and tried to parse her feelings about the last ten minutes of her life.

Lilah knew that Amaru was brutal and a little bit unstable. She also knew that Amaru was powerful. The mix of powerful and unstable had led to what felt like an inevitable conclusion: sadism. Whatever she was looking for, Amaru was willing to kill for it. She was also willing to punish her most trusted lieutenant in the process. Which didn’t bode well for Lilah.

She had been kept well away from Amaru for weeks. Aside from their introduction, Lilah hadn’t seen the other woman at all. The only news about her came from the little details that Lilah was able to glean from Javier and Brasa. The two of them spoke to each other in a way that suggested a long-suffering relationship of managing what basically amounted to tantrums when Amaru didn’t get her way.

Lilah didn’t know the extent of Javier’s abilities, but she thought she had some surface knowledge about what Brasa could do. It didn’t make sense that the two of them refused to team up and take down Amaru together. Their lives would certainly be a little less stressful without having to clean up after their sovereign.

Brasa stepped out of the bathroom and Lilah’s brain sort of stopped for a second. He was dressed in a button up and slacks, which wasn’t exactly out of the ordinary. But, Javier’s selection was a cotton in a deep purple with cuff links that glinted gold. The pants were black, of course, but cut closer to his body than he usually preferred. In fact, the whole outfit was tailored impeccably to skim the lines of his frame. Taken as a whole, Brasa looked really fucking good.

She remembered thinking that he was in shape back when he was Antonio. His conservative style and the fact that he occasionally wore a robe managed to effectively hide the body underneath. When he became Brasa, the leather coat and heavy fabrics did much the same. Now, wrapped in thin cotton, Lilah could see the breadth of his shoulders and the way the muscle rolled when he moved. It pulled at the yoke of his shirt with every breath. Brasa lifted his hands to button the cuffs and Lilah had to tuck her fingers into her palm to keep from reaching out to trace the outline of his bicep. He might be dressed like any other man in the bar, but there was no denying that Brasa could put somebody on their ass.

“You look nice,” Lilah said when she found her voice. She looked down. He was still wearing the gloves. What was with the gloves?

Brasa smiled and those fucking dimples formed on either side of his mouth. Lilah’s brain stopped again, stumbling over the fact that she could find him so completely attractive despite her less than kind feelings about him. “Thank you,” he said. “Should we go?”

Shaking herself back to awareness, Lilah pushed from the bed to stand and answered, “Yes, of course.”

He guided her out of the room and moved left down the hall. Lilah felt him take her hand while the light around her dimmed, “We’re not going the other way?”

Brasa glanced back at her, “Its faster this way.”

“Oh.”

The path was fairly straight, only a turn or two, but Lilah felt the gentle incline put a little burn in her calves. She should have known better than to wear the heels Javier picked out for her. The only way out was through the caves and the ground beneath her was unpredictable, at best.

Not long after that, moonlight cut through a large opening. Lilah stepped out into fresh air and saw that it as the same entrance Brasa brought her to on the night she found out he wasn’t human. She looked around, her brows coming together as she recognized Antonio’s car parked not too far away. It had only been a few days, but the memory of seeing Brasa standing in the doorway of the church seemed like a lifetime ago.

Brasa pulled a set of keys from his pocket and clicked a button. Lights flashed on a late model Mercedes in black. Lilah followed him to the car and let him help her into the passenger’s seat. With the door closed, Lilah let herself think that the interior was really, really nice while trying to forget that the person who owned it was probably dead. The driver’s side door opened and Brasa dropped into the seat. Lilah listened to the engine turn over, then asked, “What book is Amaru looking for?”

If Lilah wanted to live, she needed to know everything she could about the key players on the board in order to make the best decisions regarding her safety. Even if Amaru was insane, Lilah could tell that she was goal oriented. If Lilah knew the intimate details of what drove Amaru’s decisions, she could anticipate (and possibly mitigate) the danger.

Brasa’s hand hesitated over the gear shift, “A book on ancient Xibalban ritual.”

Lilah was surprised he’d actually answered the question. She decided to pry further, “What kind of ritual?”

Another hesitation, “She...wants to open the door between dimensions.”

Lilah’s head turned very slowly so that she could look at him, “She wants to do what?”

Brasa pulled away from the cave with confident hands, “Open the door between dimensions.”

“Why the fuck would she do that?”

He took a breath, “I suppose she misses home.”

Lilah stared at him for a long moment while she tried to process, “I know that I’ve only met her once—the recent murder notwithstanding—but I definitely get the feeling that Amaru isn’t capable of being homesick.”

Brasa chuckled while the car zoomed towards a distant highway, “You’re right. I think she misses the power.”

“Brasa,” she said with disbelief in her tone, “she tore the head off somebody right in front of us. How much more powerful can she get?”

“You’re right again,” he replied. “Power might not be the right word. Maybe influence is better.”

“Influence?”

A nod, “Amaru was...untouchable in Xibalba. She oversaw nearly the whole dimension, had an army of culebras that soaked the ground with blood in her name.” He paused, “Here, she’s stuck in the body of a child with a fraction of her influence. Her army can be obliterated with the next sunrise. The humans don’t know about her. Worse, its unlikely they’ll care unless she slaughters them in droves.”

Lilah’s brain helpfully supplied the image of a neck separating from a torso, “Opening a door to another dimension isn’t going to stop her from doing that.”

“I know,” he relented, “But, searching for the book is enough of a distraction to put off the need to dig mass graves for a little while.”

“How long?”

“As long as it takes.”

Lilah grabbed onto something in his tone, “You’re trying to prevent it.” Brasa was quiet long enough that she decided she was right. “I don’t think I pictured you as particularly protective of humanity.”

“I’m not,” he replied and Lilah deflated a little bit. “I’ve seen this before. She conquers her enemy, sucks the life from them until there’s nothing but a husk. She did the same in Xibalba and she’ll do the same here.”

“I don’t understand why it matters where she does it.”

“It doesn’t,” Brasa replied, “What matters is that she does it. Can you imagine what its like to see an entire world drained of everything that makes it,” he searched for the words, “a world? Can you imagine what its like to watch that happen over and over with no goal but the sheer enjoyment of watching something die?”

“No, I can’t,” Lilah said quietly. She could hear the exhaustion in his voice and it very nearly caused her to sympathize with him. “Why now? You’ve been with her forever. Why try to stop her now?”

He glanced at her briefly, “Its not obvious?”

She hissed through her teeth, “So, we meet and suddenly you want to save humanity? Is it because I happen to be a part of humanity?”

The car pulled off from the highway into a metropolitan area, “Not at all.”

“Then, what is it?”

“Change,” Brasa murmured, “Meeting you showed me that change was possible.”

Lilah rolled her eyes, “Please. You’ve lived for centuries and you just now figured that out?”

His mouth twisted, “Yes, I have lived for centuries. I have lived the same life for centuries. Do you know what its like to be told what to do every waking moment? To have no choice in who you talk to, who you threaten, who you fuck,” his voice went quiet, “who you kill?”

Well, now Lilah felt like an asshole. She shifted uncomfortably in her seat, saying, “No, I don’t.”

Brasa pulled the car to a stop in the parking lot of a building with a sleek exterior and huge windows, “I don’t have choices, Lilah. Not for the things that matter. What Amaru tells me to do, I do.”

“Why?”

“Because I have to. Because I made a mistake a long time ago.” He cut the engine and leaned towards her from across the console, “But, with you, I can see that I might not have to do that anymore if I am very, very careful.”

Lilah stared at him, “I don’t understand.”

“One day, I’m going to explain it to you,” he replied, “Not tonight, but one day. Let me give you the chance to relax for a few hours, hmm?”

He was asking her to stop for now. Lilah sighed and decided that she would heed the request, “Alright, but I want a giant drink with lots of alcohol.”

Brasa smiled, “Done.”

[gureumcity]

10 months

💌 pairing: lee hyunjae x reader, lee juyeon x reader 💌 genre: oneshot, dating bet!au, professional dancer!juyeon 💌 warning: profanity, long term heartbreak (it's kinda toxic so i put it here just in case) 💌 word count: 7.7k words 💌 author's note: was honestly inspired by the olympics, watching figure skating but i just didn’t see any of them figure skating. so if it doesn’t make sense, sorry in advance. enjoy the read as always.

[ when what you believe is a beautiful relationship, turns out to be a total lie, you lose trust in yourself more than in the boy. you shut yourself out and stop living. even when another someone helps you out and brings you back into the world again. you may be thankful but you're never quite over the first. the one who hurt continuously hurt you. over and over again. ]

"i swear to god. you're just like how everyone said!," your thundering voice was heard across the hall of your apartment complex. surely, the neighbors were annoyed. but nothing compared to the humiliation and anger you were feeling as tears ran down your cheeks and your hands in fists. "but you know? you know what's so funny? ... that i truly believed you loved me!" with a slam of the door to your home, there stood a boy baffled. because at the very least, he'd thought you would at least let him explain. but no. and now.. all he could do was wait for you to be okay. no matter how long that took.

10 months. 10 months was all it took for you to fall so deeply in love and for your heart to get as easily as broken.

lee hyunjae was a boy you met at the beginning of high school. you were born in south korea but had moved to the states (boston, massachusetts) as soon as you graduated middle school. there, you met hyunjae. he was one of the most sweetest guys you'd ever met with one of the worst reputations. pretty much what one can imagine. the high school's it boy, aka fuck boy. not very convenient when all he did was share class notes and give you winks across the hallways every time you'd walk past by each other. things progressed fast before you noticed yourself falling more in love with the boy. and one day, like a dream come true, he asks you out. you still remember the words.

"so wanna share more physics notes at my house later? and maybe also be my girlfriend?"

cringy, i know.. maybe that should have been the first red flag. but it gets worse. sure, he cared a lot about his reputation and did a good job with upholding that. but with you.. he was a natural, caring guy who seemed more interested in a lot of things than what he leads. falling in love with someone like hyunjae was easy. too easy.

so here you were. running away from your problems and flying to la, california with a scholarship for photography. you were covered for a good two, three years to study what you like to do and to get a fresh start. having yourself embarrassed in front of the school was already too much on your end. and the fact that your life was stolen while hyunjae lived daily life as he did before, definitely did not make any of it feel any better. flirting with girls, playing on the soccer team, and hanging out with the same boys. it was so sickening. not the fact that he was able to go back to his everyday routine so easily. but that he still had you wrapped around his finger. that's what made going to la, a better, and easier, decision than anything. it was like hitting two birds with one stone.

after a while, you got used to everything. you grew numb to feeling love and also expressing love. that may be why photography was your way of finding passion and emotion. you adapted fairly quickly actually. and with the biggest dance performance coming up in france, lots of other competitions were taking place which also meant cha-ching. taking photos of representatives and of the event will be a big assignment for you; not to mention lots of hot professional dancers. you had always admired dancers. the way they gracefully play with their chosen songs while using absolutely every muscle possible to present such a beautiful piece. this was your seventh show you've been to now. two years really did pass by quickly.

but don't forget. you weren't the complete loser you claim yourself as. you've made friends along the way. lee juyeon, who you had met at these said competitions. he had placed first place in many, resulting in multiple individual photoshoots of him. opening up about your life wasn't something you'd like to do. especially with the way your recent high school life back in boston ended. but with many breaks and awkward silences during those shoots, one of you was bound to speak. and you, the photographer, sadly had to be the bigger person. one thing led to another. and you two became close friends. for the first time in forever, you felt at peace and that you belonged somewhere. lee younghoon, you had met in la. he was forced by his dad to come to one of the dance competitions. regardless of his intention to come for fun or not, he had bumped into you and dropped your coffee all over, resulting in his many apologies and a talk in the cafe after. you know how the rest goes. juyeon and younghoon meet and the three of you were now closer than ever.

feeling your phone buzz in your pocket, you reach for it to be faced with the familiar caller id, "bro", quickly putting him on speaker.

"hello?"

"hello? is that all you gotta say to me after days of not talking? i have called you like five times today and you have answered once!" you chuckle at the upset voice across the device. "well then, sunwoo, maybe you should get a life instead of calling me so much." all you hear on the other end was a scoff as you finish packing your bag. sunwoo was your twin brother. well, separated twin brother. after the divorce, you went with your mother to boston while he stayed with your father back in korea. you two still kept in good contact and met up occasionally but it wasn't the usual family situation. "anywayyy! when's your flight?"

you hear a knock at the door and keys jangling before seeing juyeon walk in. "on monday. why?" watching as he took his shoes off and sat down on the couch, you gesture to him that you'll be with him a second. "nothing. it's just our birthday soon! so i'm holding a party for us. so since your flight is gonna be on monday, you'll definitely be able to make it to our party. right? you need to! listen to your big brother! you have to be there, okay?"

"you're literally two minutes older. stop acting as if you're more superior. i'm gonna go," juyeon's chuckle could be heard as he listened to you fight with your twin brother. you quickly end the phone call and walk over to your couch. "sorry about that. sunwoo keeps bothering me about our birthday.."

"speaking of birthday.. am i invited?"

"juyeon. are you kidding me? of course you're invited. i just didn't ask cause i know you're busy with training and i didn't want to be the reason you skip out on practice during such an important time.." he places your keys in your hands and smiles. "your birthday is much more important than anything. i'll go. besides i have something else to say..," as you drop your keys on the table, he clears his throat. "i'm moving back to korea. my training in america is over and i have to practice back home. plus dance performance is in france anyway. so i gotta get back soon."

"you're kidding!"

"nope. just bought my plane ticket. it's the same time and close to your seat too. maybe we can ask to switch seats with the person sitting next to you." with a quick jump, you wrap your arms around him. "ahh! i'm so excited. yes. we'll definitely do that. and since younghoon's back in korea too, i can invite him too."

the flight back was as normal as it can be. you both fell asleep midway but got to enjoy the sunset below. when you landed, it was around 3pm and sunwoo was already there, waiting. "ooh. guess who brought their boyfriend!" he teased, and as much as you didn't want to, your smile disappears. nothing wrong with juyeon. but it's just you haven't heard you and boyfriend in the same phrase for a while and it made you cringe. "yea yea.. anyway let's go." with yours and juyeon's luggage in the trunk, you decided to sit in the back with juyeon up in the passenger seat.

"so.. have you decided where you wanna live?" sunwoo asks as juyeon looks at you through the rear mirror with a smile. "actually.. yea, i have. younghoon's let us use his house. the benefits to having a rich friend." with chuckles, sunwoo thanks juyeon for changing the address on the navi. "you're still paying rent though, right?"

"of course i am. who do you think i am? a freeloader?," the silence was so loud, it hurt. "wow.. thanks guys."

unpacking was harder than packing. at least when you're putting things back in, all you have to worry about things crinkling up or folding in a weird way but once there out, you gotta think about how to place them somewhere. but you did what you could and managed to figure it out. "you finished unpacking?" you hear younghoon's voice outside your room. "yea! i'll be out in just a sec." and once you were downstairs in the living room, you see younghoon and juyeon sitting on the black, leather, very younghoon-like, couch.

"okay. we're gonna need to make some rules," juyeon and you catch each other rolling your eyes at younghoon's words before laughing. "look. i don't care how messy your rooms get. i won't step one foot in them. but! you can't mess my room or the downstairs rooms. especially the kitchen. understand?," after seeing the two of you physically nod, did younghoon let the two of you go. "good. so what do you guys wanna do on your first day back? after a good night's sleep, i'm sure you guys can have some fun.."

"i'm down to go clubbing.." juyeon starts. "just like old times?" you add on, as if you were finishing his sentence. silence meant agreement. so off the three of you ran, up to your rooms to get dressed.

let's just say the day went by quick and the next day was hangover day for the three of you. four days passed and today was the party. sunwoo had basically forced you to come to your own party that you didn't even plan. just added a few people on the guestlist but that's all you got to do. not that you were complaining. you didn't really care much anyway. it just gave you a reason to dress up.

"so.. how's the birthday girl?," you smiled at the voice before turning around to see juyeon, showing off your outfit. "apparently all ready for the party.. happy birthday, y/n." with him opening up his arms, you walk into his embrace. "you know. it feels weird to be back here. i don't know if i should go see my dad.."

"you do what you wanna do. but for now..," you chuckle as he pushes you out the room and guides you downstairs to the car outside. "hop in. i'm driving us to sunwoo's house." you watch as younghoon gets in the back and immediately puts his airpods in. it takes a few minutes to drive over and when you see the neighborhood, it wasn't hard to guess which house the party was being held. the music was loud and the big banner said everything. you just hoped he had warned his neighbors first. but that wasn't your concern.

"hey guys! the birthday girl is here!! late! but here." sunwoo says as he opens the door, loud enough the attention goes to you. and to your embarrassment, juyeon grabs your hand and takes you into the kitchen. "a drink?" taking in the amount of people in here, you were scared people would think you guys were a frat. with a simple nod, juyeon pours in two cups of punch and hands one to you. "thanks.."

"hey sunwoo. where do we put all the gifts?" younghoon speaks up, carrying all the gifts you guys had brought over. yes, it may be your birthday but it was sunwoo's too. you couldn't not buy him something. "oh. just put them all into this room." you help younghoon with the gifts and place them where sunwoo had told you to. after a while, there were almost a hundred people in the house.

"this should be everyone, right?" you ask sunwoo as he was checking the guestlist. "no," your smile drops. what? how could he possibly know this many people that want to come and celebrate his birthday with him? "you know a few of them. eric and them are coming but i told them to bring the cake. i knew something would happen to it if i had prepared it beforehand. so i had them pick it up. they're heading over soon after they pick up their friends too." you down your drink and walk over to the couch where juyeon relaxes. "i swear sunwoo plays around too much or something. i knew this was gonna be a party but with this many people? goddamn." juyeon chuckles at your frustration. "why don't you go grab another drink? get me one too while you're at it." you nod, heading over to the kitchen before someone else enters through the door. you catch a glance at the newcomers and immediately gasp when you see the last person entering. you wanted to hide. you wanted to literally disappear. it's been almost three years? and you thought you had gotten better. but what is this reaction? now you were back to square one. you felt pathetic. and to think, you didn't think it could get worse. until it did. his eyes catch yours and he smiles. smiles! you poured the two drinks and walk your way over. and just when he thinks he has a chance to talk to you, you pass by him and sit down next to juyeon. and as your best friend, it felt only right he ask what was wrong.

"hey.. you good?" your eyes said everything. juyeon sat up straight. "it's him.. hyunjae. why is here? how does he even know sunwoo?" all that anger and humiliation from that night was building back up. and if it wasn't for juyeon holding you back, you would have left this place before the actual party even started. all while you were panicking, hyunjae couldn't take his eyes off you. you were as beautiful as he remembered. maybe even more. "hey guys! you're finally here." you and juyeon watch as kevin and his other friend, you assume, place the very large cake on the kitchen island. "y/n?" your attention shifts over to the voice before seeing chanhee.

"oh my god! eric? it's been so long. what the hell? how are you so tall?" you said, hugging his now tall and lean figure. "well. the last time we saw each other was like five years ago.." you nodded, acknowledging his words but still shocked by his growth. "do i get a hug too?" you see changmin peeking his head through so you immediately open your arms. "of course! you guys are.. men! that's crazy." once sunwoo comes your way, he starts introducing you to his friends.

"so this is my twin sister, y/n. you know changmin, chanhee, eric. this is kevin, jacob, sangyeon, haknyeon. and this is hyunjae. he's also from boston. ha! it'd be funny if you knew each other." sunwoo explains and you couldn't help but let out a little sigh at his name. just like a hero, juyeon's up from the couch and wraps his arm around your shoulder. "nice to meet you guys. i'm juyeon." he says placing out his hand in which sangyeon accepts first. and the rest followed. "wait wait.. i wanna hear you guys talk. say something in english." changmin says, interested. "you guys probably won't even understand anyway." you say as everyone gasps sarcastically. "oh come on, y/n. don't be a party pooper." with sunwoo's words, you roll your eyes and clear your throat.

"how's life been for you?" you started first, deadpan. "it's been good, i guess. what have you been up to?"

"that's none of your business." you hear the others cheering at the accents, having no idea what you two had even said. well, besides younghoon who chuckled and maybe a bit of juyeon. even though he may have a translator, you're sure he caught on to most of it. that was until you realized more people might have caught on your guys’ english conversation.

you know how the rest of the party went. people got way too drunk, passed out, some left, and you're pretty sure you heard a few couples upstairs doing god knows what. and the whole night, all you could do was talk to juyeon as younghoon was getting friendly with changmin and chanhee. and despite all that, you couldn't get drunk. you don't know what kind of mistake you could make with hyunjae and you couldn't risk anything. when there was about half of the people left, you stood up to use the restroom. after drinking almost three bottles of water, you needed to pee. after finishing your business, you wanted to get back to juyeon. but hyunjae had other plans. he grabs your hand and takes you outside without saying anything. when you realize you were already far out as two houses down, you shake your hand off and glare at him. "what? you're mad? when all you've been doing is hanging out with that juyeon dude? what? are you guys dating? is he your boyfriend?"

"what? hyunjae. you're drunk."

"no. i'm perfectly fine." his slurring voice wasn't hard to miss, proving that he indeed was drunk. too drunk, in fact. he grabs both your wrists this time so hard that you winced. "hyunjae."

"hyunjae."

"why is everything so easy for you? i know you don't even like him. i can see it. you don't look at him the way you used to look at me. come on. don't you feel anything for me? even when i do this?" when you feel him stepping closer, you step back. "hyunjae! i'm warning you. let. go," you tried to wriggle out his grasp. you can feel your wrists bruising. "hyunjae.. it hurts. please..." when hyunjae sees your eyes tearing up, he loosens his grip. "i'm sorry. i didn't mean to." you step away, a tear slipping away.

"i hate you." you quickly retrace your steps back into the house and grab your bag, immediately running out. juyeon follows you out with his car keys, unlocking the vehicle. (you drove, no worries. no drinking and driving!)

the next day, your head hurt. but none of it from any alcohol. from the way you kept tossing and turning last night, thinking of hyunjae. out of all the simulations you have made in your mind of what would happen when you by chance, ever bump into him again, that was not it. once you got downstairs, you had noticed porridge on the table with a note on top.

i know you couldn't sleep at night so i made you this. make sure to heat it up before you eat it. - younghoon

younghoon keeps quiet about other people's business but always knew what was going on. he was a nice guy who took advantage of his skill and helps. you wish there were more people like him in the world.

"so.. that was hyunjae, huh?" juyeon's groggy voice is heard. "yea.."

"remind me what happened?," you release a soft sigh as you take out the porridge from the microwave. "just humor me. i want to know how this dude fucked himself up."

"okay.. i guess," you sat down. "yesterday, he dragged me out, absolutely off his limit and starts yelling at me about you. almost like he's... jealous? i didn't understand his words but i know what his intentions were. he's still the same asshole he was years back." juyeon watches your reaction. he's never met hyunjae in his life. all he knows is the hyunjae from your stories. and that was enough to know that he was a dick. but he never noticed that you still have remaining feelings for him, whether you'd admit or not. did he have competition? probably not, after last night. or at least, that's what juyeon was hoping.

--------------------

hyunjae, on the other hand, had woken up around an hour ago, completely regretting everything he said last night. he didn't mean any of it. sure. deep down, he was jealous at the way you laughed at everything juyeon said or the way you leaned into his shoulders like he's the one you love. he hated it. all of it. and when he thinks of that day of your guys' fight, he grimaces. instead of waiting for you to reach out to him like a coward, he wishes he had the courage to just tell you. even if that hadn't changed a thing. at least, he would have been able to confess his true feelings to you.

"dude.. do you and juyeon know each other or something?" eric asks from his bed, watching some anime on the tv screen. "what do you mean?"

"i mean.. i don't know if it was just me but it seemed like he was glaring at you the whole night yesterday. did you flirt with y/n? she seems to have a thing with juyeon." hyunjae's eyebrows twitch at those words but at some point, he had to admit. he was years late. and he didn't have to know the whole story to know that juyeon was probably there for you when he wasn't. "uhh no.. i don't know man," eric shrugs and continues to slurp his ramen noodles. "speaking of.. do you have y/n's number? i wasn't able to get it last night and i saw that you were exchanging numbers." hyunjae casually says, hoping eric doesn't find anything suspicious. "oh yea. i'll send it to you right now. but i'm warning you, dude. i'm pretty sure they're a thing." and when his own phone buzzes, he couldn't help but smile. "okay whatever.. thanks,"

"anyway.. i gotta go. let's finish the series next time." he murmurs before rushing out the door. eric's attention wasn't even anywhere near what he said so he escaped through eric's house and immediately got into his car and dialed the number he had just received.

when he hears the phone call picked up and all you say was a simple "hello?" yet his heart was already fluttering. "hey. it's hyunjae. don't! end the call.. i just.. i know i don't exactly deserve it but i wanted to explain myself. about everything. no matter how late my apology is.. could we meet up somewhere?," the silence scared him. he wouldn't have known if you had the ended the call unless he hadn't checked. "y/n?"

"um. yea.. sure. meet me at the park near sunwoo's house," and with that, you ended the call. "hey guys.. i'm gonna head out. i'll be back in a few." you can see the two boys nod their head but you're sure they're too distracted with their gaming so you slip out the door with your bag and phone in your hand. when you parked your car, you could see a fancy car on the other side of the block. you watch as hyunjae walks out of the said vehicle. while you knew hyunjae had come from a wealthy family, it didn't occur to you that he was this wealthy.

"hey.. thanks for meeting me." hyunjae says, taking in your beauty. you hum a response, waiting for whatever he needed to say and seated yourself next to him on the bench. "so.."

"so. i came to apologize. and to explain. back when the guys had made this bet, it all started off because i thought you were pretty. but you know.. you hated the whole reputation thing we held so i knew i didn't have a chance with you. and when i said that you're totally out of my league, that you would never date me, they told me that they'd pay me if i got you to be my girlfriend. it was only for six months though. but i held out onto it. cause being with you felt so much better than i had first expected," you couldn't help but scoff. “and i know that none of this is an excuse to treat you this way. but i just want you to know that i never wanted you to get hurt. and i was just blinded by the fact that i could get a little bit of money while also getting the girl i liked. i was stupid. i'm sorry."

"how much?"

"huh?"

"how much?"

"$500."

"so playing with my heart was worth $500 for you?"

"i didn't take the money. i didn't take any of it. i told them that this was wrong and that none of it-"

"what do you want me to say? thanks? congrats?," hyunjae felt shivers down his spine when you stand up. he knew that in some sort of way, he had messed up again. "congrats for liking me despite the mere $500 i was worth? and for believing that this shitty apology cuts out for all those nights i cried myself to sleep. i hope you get some of that guilt off your chest because you sure seemed like you needed to get this off your chest. and i'm also sorry if you came today thinking i would accept your apology because i don't. i really wished i could." gathering your things, you make yourself back to your car before hearing, "i still love you!" you freeze in your place. what? when you feel his presence again, you slowly turn around. eyes in contact with one another and your hands stop moving.

"what?"

"y/n.. i never stopped loving you." your tears had started to build up to your eyes in which you failed to hide. with a swift move, you were in hyunjae's arms. this time, you could smell his cologne. his intoxicating cologne. and feel his heartbeat. the warm vibration as he mutters sorry over and over again. and as hard as it was, you place your hand on his chest and slowly push yourself away. "but you know what, hyunjae?," looking into his eyes once more, you smile. "it doesn't matter whether or not you took the money. it's the fact that you took a deal with my heart on the end of it because you were blinded by greed. goodbye."

for the second time, hyunjae watches you walk away. and it hurt the same just as it did the first time. but like the first, he can do nothing but watch.

--------------------

"so why the hell did you not tell me about hyunjae?" it's been almost two weeks since the talk and sunwoo is freaking out over hyunjae. technically, he's not even supposed to know about him but he walked in on juyeon and you talking about what to do with hyunjae. now sunwoo has seated the both of you at your shared dining table and demands to know what happened. all you could do was sigh because you knew his stubbornness wouldn't help.

"him and i dated senior year. we met each other in high school. and just like a wattpad story, he was your regular fuck boy that flirted with every girl he had the chance to. but he was sweet to me. spoke to me about his true interests. if that's even what those were.. anyway. basically i thought that he was able to open himself up to me that he couldn't to others because of his image. we dated 10 months and into the summer, he tells me that he didn't mean it to end this way but that everything just started off as a bet among his friends. we fought back and forth. cause he just kept giving me this bullshit excuse that he meant everything despite the bet. so i ended up yelling at him and left australia," sunwoo's jaw dropping was enough for you to know hyunjae was no longer invited to your birthday parties. "but i know that you guys are good friends. and i'm sure he's changed now. so don't mind me. i just happen to have a history with him."

"okay so wait.. i only care about one thing right now."

"what?" sunwoo clears his throat, staring at juyeon. "do you still like him?" you stare at your hands on your lap, not knowing how to answer. juyeon had seen this coming. matter of fact, he's been hurt by your answer to this question every time. even when you replied yes or the silence. it both meant you still had feelings for hyunjae anyway. but this time. "i don't know." juyeon's eyes shift over to you. he wondered what made you change your answer this time. you honestly didn't know either. "okay then? and i think you're right. hyunjae has changed. so i hope you don't mind that we'll still occasionally hang out." you shook your head, reassuring that you were okay with this.

a month passes since you got back from america and you were settled for good now. taking up little projects and finding customers here and there. your online shop helped a lot in setting up this mini business for you. juyeon and younghoon really helped out in advertising.

just as you push your shopping cart in the supermarket, you find yourself in front of someone. "hyunjae.."

"hey. how's everything going?" you smile at the casual conversation starter. "good.. yea. you?"

"the same old. same old..," as you pull your cart out of the way, hyunjae takes a hold of your hand. "y/n.. can i suggest something?" you stare at him, confused.

"i know this is a stretch. but i'd rather know i took all the chances i had with you before fully letting go. and.. i was wondering if you would go on three dates. just three. no strings attached and nothing serious. i'll treat you to all three. and if you truly feel absolutely nothing, i'll let you go. hmm?"

--------------------

"what did she say? she obviously said no, right?" younghoon watches as juyeon stresses out. you had to go to an appointment and since juyeon wasn't home, you had told younghoon to let juyeon know what's going on. "she said yes."

"what?"

"she wants to give him a chance."

"you're kidding, right-"

"not because she wants this to work. she just wants to feel better. she agrees that this relationship needs a better wrap-up. that's why she agreed," with juyeon's sigh, younghoon chuckles. "don't worry. she doesn't like him." at his words, juyeon lets out an awkward chuckle. "you knew?"

"knew what? that you like y/n? yea dude. it's pretty obvious. i'm sure almost everyone at the birthday party caught on," his panicking breaths was enough for younghoon to pat juyeon's back. "except y/n.. knowing her, she would've probably said something about it by now. so lighten up, dude. and let her end this relationship the way she wants before fully going for it." juyeon nods slowly.

--------------------

the first date took place on september 13. his very own birthday. he ended up holding his party a few days before instead to spend it with you.  hyunjae took you out to an amusement park with little mazes in between. he bought you all your favorite snacks that you were shocked he even remembered. dropping cute comments out of nowhere. "you look so pretty." while playing with his fingers. "let me.." while tying your shoelaces. he didn't try anything too much and kept his distance with you. enough to show respect and you admired him for that. although it wouldn't be the thing that would bring you back to him. because no matter how much he looked out for you, this just wasn't it.

the second date took place on october 31. you remember the first halloween party you went together, his shih tzu welcomed you. maybe that was why but this time, he took you to a dog cafe. you were able to enjoy your favorite coffee while playing with cute samoyeds and poodles. really attentive to you, he made sure you were able to feed the puppies, play with him, and stay after hours too. you were sure that one cost a bit. but you pretended not to know as he tried to hide his payment as much as possible. you hated to admit. but he was a gentleman. well, in a way, you guess he always was. but no matter how much he paid attention to you, this just wasn't it.

the third and final date took place on november 15. he took you to a festival. one that usually sells out fast and only comes twice a year. he made sure to keep refilling tickets to allow you more games, which meant more stuffed animals. when it hit ten o'clock, the fireworks went off. you let him hug you. you understand. fireworks makes one emotional. you slowly wrap your arms around him. "i love you.." you stare at the show in the sky. "mm.. it's so pretty....." hyunjae tried not to notice you didn't say it back. but he wasn't expecting much. because no matter how much he made you feel loved, this just wasn't it.

he knew. he knew all of it. he knew that even if you still liked him.. your heart belonged to another. you just didn't know it.

--------------------

about a few weeks after the final date, hyunjae reaches out to you. saying he wanted to meet up on november 30. you don't know why he had to push it back two weeks to hear your answer. but you knew the feeling. the feeling of wanting to stop time and just love a little longer.

juyeon had barely asked you about any of the dates with you and hyunjae. and to say you were worried was an understatement. whether you noticed or not, juyeon's opinion mattered a lot to you. you thought about it. why your heart ached when he wasn't home much anymore to ask you things and why it bothered you so much to not see him in his room before going to sleep. he'd been the guy you go to. the therapist that helps you solve any situation. the dancer who helped you open up when you doubted your skill in photography. the guy that reminded you your self worth and brought you back to this world. the best friend you fell in love with.

you blinked at your realization. all this time you had thought falling in love with hyunjae was easy. maybe love wasn't supposed to be easy. maybe it was supposed to be a roller coaster. driving over to hyunjae's was now a lighter feeling than how the day started off. when hyunjae saw you parking in the driveway, he prepared himself. he took in a breath and opened the door.

"want some tea?" hyunjae offers, knowing you're not here to stay long anyway. but it was still worth a try. he told himself that he'd give it his all and he was trying. even if he knew, nothing would ever work. you shake your head and sit down on one of the chairs by his kitchen counter. "hyunjae.. i came here to say that-"

"wait," he stops you, scared. "lemme go first," when he sees you nod softly, he gulps. "look. the past three dates has been everything to me. i don't regret any of it. i'm so happy i saw you smile. i'm so happy i got to hug you. and i'm so happy i got to tell you that i love you. one last time..," he bites his quivering lip as tears rise up in his eyes. "i know what you're here to say. so i just wanted to say thank you. thanks for giving me a chance to love you again. thanks for giving me a chance to treat you the way i couldn't back then." hearing his voice crack made your heart break. you wanted to wipe his tears away but you know you shouldn't. you don't get to since you're the cause of those tears anyway.

"hyunjae..," you watch his hands shaking in his lap, slowly placing your hand in his. you feel his tears falling on your fingers, tears threatening to fall yourself. "i'm sorry i can't tell you what you want me to say. thank you for showing me the person you have become and that you will find someone better. i know that's such a bitchy thing to say. but i mean it. hyunjae.. you've grown. and i really would've liked it if this would've worked. but i'm.. i just-"

"you love juyeon," as you look up, a tear falls down your right cheek. he slowly stands up, sniffling through his tears. "you should go to him. i know he's probably wrecking his brain right now, waiting."

you let out a chuckle before wiping your own tears. "can i hug you?" you nod as you allow yourself to be engulfed in his warm embrace. hyunjae's uneven breathing didn't make any of this easier. after about a minute, you slowly pull away. "thanks hyunjae.. for everything." with a nod of agreement, you both let go and he walks you out.

"y/n...," you turn around. "at least tell me one thing.. will he treat you better?"

"mhmm.. he's the best."

"then.. that's all that matters."

as soon as you get in your car and you're on the road, your phone starts dialing. and to no surprise, you're hit with voicemail. "juyeon? i have something to say to you. i'm on my way home. please.. please be there.." you knew juyeon felt something for you. it'd be crazy if he hadn't. almost every friend of yours has asked you if you were dating him. just by the way he looks at you, treats you, and finds some way to stop you from going on blind dates; that your friends set up. you just didn't say anything because it wasn't like you could reject him and risk loosing him forever or accept him while you were still in love with another. your parked car in the driveway was nothing near straight but you honestly just wanted to get back into the house. running to the door, frustrated that you couldn't find your house keys. but when the door unlocks and you're met with just the man you wanted to see, your body just wants one thing. you immediately hug him. "i'm so sorry.. i'm so sorry for not doing something before."

"you idiot. i've been waiting for like three months. if the past two years doesn't count." you were so relieved from his words that your heart skipped two beats.

"look ju.. i don't know what to say."

"then don't say anything.. just kiss me." not even a second passes before your lips are on his. despite the ticklish feeling of his eyelashes batting against your cheek and the fact you two were still at the door, this couldn't have felt more right. you and juyeon. you should've noticed sooner. but for now, him having his hand on your back and the other on your neck was just perfect. it felt like nothing in the world could go wrong. after a while, you slowly let go. only because you were running out of breath.

"so. do i get to meet your parents now?" you chuckle at the way his mind works. "yes.. i'll arrange something," you slowly watch him close the door and walk you to the sofa. the two of you lay together, your head on his chest as he softly combs through your hair. you hum at the feeling. "at least i won't have to see my dad alone.."

"what happened? with your parents, i mean. you never told me why you're so scared to see your dad." with a sigh, you stare at your hands intertwined with his. "well.. the thing with my dad is that.. i've watched my dad fight with my mom one too many times and after moving with my mom in the divorce, i'm scared that he hates me. he's not abusive or mean or anything, actually. in fact, i love my dad. but i'm so scared that he doesn't want to see me anymore. especially after i ran when he saw me at the grocery store five years ago. i literally ran away. he hates me. i just know it.."

you watch as juyeon gives you a very judging look. "really?"

"what?"

"y/n.. what's not to like about you being his daughter? i'm sure this is all just a misunderstanding. you know what? you're gonna go see him. now." juyeon instantly starts packing some stuff in a bag and running to get the car keys that you had just threw on the ground a while ago. "wait! wait.. can you come with me then?" juyeon's grin slowly changes into a terrified facial expression.

"me? meet your father?" a few seconds later, and younghoon comes walking down the stairs. "so yall done now?" the blushing looks of both your faces was enough to make him chuckle.

"how long were you there?"

"long enough to say finally. come on. pack up. i'll drive us over to your dad's house. in fact, sunwoo texted me that he has a cold but sunwoo has to stay at work. so we're gonna go there and take care of him."

--------------------

the loud sound of your heartbeat echoed in your chest, all the way up to your ears that you could barely hear anything around you. as you waited at the doorstep of what you've been told was where your dad lived, juyeon holds your hand tightly. younghoon chuckles behind the two of you when he sees the two of your shoulders tighten at the sound of footsteps getting closer.

"who is it?," as the door opens, your eyes widen. you curse at yourself just imagining how stupid you must look. "y/n."

"dad?"

"uhh... come on in." your dad clears his throat and moves out the way. hesitant, but you enter, taking in the view of the house. when you're suddenly pulled back into a hug, who you assume was juyeon, or younghoon, was the very father you believe hated you. "dad.."

"y/n. i am so happy to see you here. i really am."

tears rose up as you wrapped your arms around him.

--------------------

10 months later and today was the day of the france dance event. you're in the crowd, cheering for lee juyeon, your boyfriend, right next to all the boys and your father sitting next to you. hearing the crowd chanting your boyfriend's name made you feel proud. you glance over at hyunjae who was obviously staring. and for once, you had the power to stop looking. not like all those years. and for once, you're looking at someone who loves you as much as you love them. you join in with your fans.

"lee juyeon! lee juyeon! lee juyeon!"

you watched as the scores to his short and free add up. his ranking going from 4th to 2nd and a point away from 1st to "lee juyeon! winner of this year’s best dance performance! congratulations!!" the last thing you remember is screaming and the place going wild.

--------------------

the after party was as good as it gets. a little bit fancier than what you and your boys are used to. but they offered chocolate ice cream, juyeon's favorite. but now that you were back home, you were able to grill steak outside and hold a little after party amongst yourselves.

once everybody left, you and juyeon find your way outside again with a bottle of wine and glasses. "juyeon.. congratulations."

"i won it for you."

"what do you mean?"

"do you remember when we first met? and you told how amazing it'd be if i won the comp event.. that you'd grant me a wish," you blink, reminiscing the moment, slowly nodding. "well, i was going to wish for you to give me a chance. but since that's already happened.." you watched as he cleared his throat and started to bend down on one knee. you gasped, seeing the box in his hands.

"oh my god. juyeon." your hands covering your mouth in shock. "y/n.. for as long as i've known you, i have spent every second liking you and loving you. i overthought every single detail. but now that it comes to this, i thought as long as i'm the one down on one knee and you're the one in front of me, where i do it, how i do it, when i do it.. it shouldn't matter. i love you, y/n. will you be the one watching me from the stands at competitions as long as i shall dance? and will you let me be the one to love you from now and forever? marry me?"

"yes.. yes! oh my.. ju yes!" the next thing you know, people surrounding you in hollers. "you guys didn't go home yet?" juyeon's confused look makes everyone laugh. "after making it that obvious you were proposing? hell no." sunwoo says.

"well.. can we have our moment before you ruin it even more?" you say as the boys crowd your romantic moment. they all start mumbling apologies, giving you two space. "anyway... where were we?" you smile as he wraps his arms around your waist.

"i believe we were about to kiss."

"i believe you said yes..”

"i sure did.. i love you."

"and i love you, my love.."