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impala-dreamer · 7 years

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NJCon Through A Dreamer's Eyes...

My Memories of the weekend. It’s long, so it’s under the cut.

I know I’m going to forget things, but here’s what I remember most: (in no logical order)

Jason Manns is a really cool dude. We had a few moments that made me think some thoughts. My selfie with him is one of my fave pics from the weekend. We’re totally in love. Lol.

Emily Swallow is a beautiful bird who has been magicked to us from the 1970s and I want to have a sleepover girly party with her and I told her as much. She’s beautiful.

I’m fairly certain that Kim Rhodes and I are the same person.

I want to bed Brianna. And I have no shame in saying that.

Ruth Connell is the most adorable being to ever walk the Earth AND she can fucking sing like an angel and I want to put her in my pocket to keep her forever.

Shoshanna is an absolutely beautiful soul. Her panel was incredible and I cried through most of it. Immediately bought an auto with her afterwards and I’m so happy that I got to meet her. She’s just… an exceptional human being.

Louden Swain!!! So… this is funny. I have always loved Mike. He’s adorable. I said as much when they took the stage on Friday, and April (who just met my husband) says, “Yeah, because he’s an Asian version of Bill (my husband)” to which i was like “Naw…. OH MY LORD you’re right!” lol. I even sent Bill and picture and he goes “Yeah, that’s me!” lol. So… I go to get my CD signed, and I was going down the line and I said “Hi” to Billy, bc … whatever. He gets enough attention. I told Steven about my 10 year old being a drummer and he was like “Awe, cool!” And then.. I get to Mike. I put my hands on the table and leaned over and said: “You wanna hear the most awkward thing you’ll hear all weekend?” He looks up and says “YES!”. “I love you and you’re adorable and I just realized it’s because you look just like my husband.” And he turned pink and giggled. I walked away very proud of myself! Lol.

Jake Abel. Jake… Abel…. He grew up, dude. Wow. That man… is gorgeous. His panel was awesome and we all walked away with a twinkle in our eyes. Well, then we get to his autograph, and April is all cute and nice to him. I get up and lean down on the table (this apparently is my “you listen here, sonny” move of the weekend) and I said, “You sir, are incredibly charming. You panel was great.” And he said “I love compliments! Keep them coming!” April chimes in with “You converted her! She hated Adam!” And I was like “Hold up, I don’t HATE Adam… OK, I did… “ Turn back to Jake and wag my finger at him and go, “You are charming as fuck. Keep it up” And he laughed. He’s fucking charming, and he needs to know that. Lol

JDM: That man OOZES testosterone. I don’t even like him, but he walked passed me and April and my knees actually buckled. He is SEX on legs. I’m not even exaggerating. And he’s so sweet and kind and just amazing.

Rachel Minor was beautiful and so sweet and just a lovely person. Her panel was great and she was truly excited to see everyone. For her autograph, I don’t know what happened, but I just about started to cry, so I turned my face away and she said “No, No, it’s OK” And she grabbed my hand and squeezed me a bit. She was so … she’s just a kind unicorn and that’s the end of that. I will love her for the rest of my days.

Karaoke was LOUD and hilarious. Emily was my favorite thing ever and she wore a Tiger costume and did the running man. She is literally adorable.

SNS- AMAZING. Like, I could probably do 3K just on that, but I won’t. Just know it was very emotional for me and I cried hard. HARD.

MARK SHEPPARD: He was my first photo op. I was a little nervous, but I pushed through. I walked up and said “I have always loved you, Mark.” He smiled and I went to hug him, but he turned me and pressed his cheek to mine for the photo. He was solid and real and I was like “Holy crap”. After the photo, he’s still got his hands on me and I said, “We’re all going to miss you.” And he squeezed my shoulder. I walked away, hit the door and started crying. I don’t know what it was, or why, but I cried. He has been in every single show I’ve ever loved, and … he’s just… MARK. So cool. His panel was FUCKING HILARIOUS AND I LOVE HIM. My auto with him: I have my box ready to sign, but I have a specific place I need J2M2 to sign it, because I’m insane. So… It went something like this:

Me: Hi Mark!Mark: Hi. (kinda smile. He goes to sign the top and I waved my hand over it)

Me: No! Could you please sign on this side?

Mark: No.

Me: Please?Mark: Where?

Me: Here (shows spot)

Mark: No.

Me: Please?Mark: Why?Me: Because I need you to sign in here.

Mark: Why?Me: Because I love you.

Mark: No.

Me: Fucking Sign It!Mark: Well, tip it up!Me: THANK YOU!

Mark: *Smirk*

It was magical and I love him so much.

MISHA COLLINS: I woke up Saturday morning and my first thought was MISHA!!! So… I go in for the auto, and amazingly I’m not too nervous. I see him standing there and I think “fuck, he’s skinny” lol. I watch him do his thing, some girl jumps on his back, another does a silly pose. Then these girls are asking him to do something and he’s saying ‘no’, he doesn’t want to, but they insist, and so they pose with him “smacking” their asses. It kinda seemed like he wasn’t happy with it. So, anyway, I get up and I’m like “Hi Mr. Collins!” And he says Hi, and then I was like “Um… dealer’s choice.” So we smushed together and he gave like a finger gun. It was cute, but I walked away kinda disappointed. Like, he wasn’t MISHA. It was weird. Later at his panel he explained how he’d been traveling for like 17 hours to get there and had taken a sleeping pill and then not slept on the plane, so apparently not-Misha was just exhausted-Misha, so I gave him a pass. We’re cool again. He’s still Misha. BTW- we got TWO Misha panels because of a JDM time issue on Sunday and it was awesome. He is … well… Misha. He’s funny and filthy and I love him. Sigh.

His auto: I had him sign “Sam’s side” of the box. Because I know Crowley and Sam hate each other, so I split up my Destiel for Sam’s sake (did I mention I’m insane? OK, cool)

He goes to sign THE TOP! So I said “i’m so sorry, I gotta direct you to sign over here” and he kinda was like “Fuck you, I do what I want” But he did. IN GOLD. Everyone else signed in silver, but Misha used GOLD because… it’s fuckin’ Misha. Anyway… I said “I know you must be exhausted, but thank you so much for being here. You are fucking amazing.” And he looked up… and Winked that big-ass, Misha wink. And I was like “fuck yeah” Misha.

JENSEN ACKLES: What do I say about Jensen? Do I describe how I could barely look him in the face? I guess I’ll be honest and tell the truth as it happened to me….

I shared an op with my Stephie (bless her for snatching that up for us). I was fine on line, we get in the room and I start freaking out. Halfway up the line I turn to her and say, “I don’t feel good” And she goes “You’re fine” and I’m like, “I am. I got this.”

Then I feel it. I know I’m going to cry. It’s so tight in my gut and it’s working it’s way up. Now, my fear before hand was being taken out of line in my Jared op, so for this to be happening for Jensen kinda shocked me. So, I finally see him, and I grabbed Steph’s arm and I remember saying “THIGHS” lol. But then all hell breaks loose inside of me. I start shaking and the tears are coming. We get two away, and I spin around away from Jensen and say aloud, “I AM NO OK!” So the I’m Alive lady steps towards me, but Steph calls her off and just spins me back around, has her hand on my back and she’s like “It’s OK, bring it down. You got this.” And SOMEHOW I managed to suck it all up and walk over to Jensen.

Now, here’s where it gets blurry. I look up at his face and I go, “Oh My God!” And I run to him. He opens his arms, and I duck under one, and Steph the other. I have my arm around his back and I didn’t know what to do with my hand, so I shoved it up under his arm. Lol. So I’m… in Jensen’s pits. And … I took a deep breath. (did not like his smell. Don’t hate me. It did not agree with my nose. lol) Anyway… then I said thanks and walked out. NOW- STEPH Says That I also said “I WANT TO SQUISH YOU!” But I clearly blacked out, because I do not remember that. Anyway, next thing I know, we are standing outside (edited for adult content) and I am full on panic attack. My entire body is shaking. My stomach is quaking, I can’t breath. I’m just clinging to the balcony bricks like “HOLY FUCKING SHIT” and I takes me about thirty mins to calm down. I go back to the room and kick April out and I just cried. Like, full on, sobbing tears. Then, dried off, took a shot of whiskey and moved on with my life.

I met Jensen twice more that day, but I’ll save those for later.

JARED PADALECKI: I was not nervous. I was not emotional. I got online, and I was fine. I saw his shoes first. And then as we got closer, his legs, then his hands, and then finally his face. I started to get a little choked up, but the girl behind me was full on crying, so I turned and said to her “You listen to me, Jared is a ray of sunshine and he’s about to make everything ok” And she calmed down. I think telling her to stop crying actually kept me from crying. OK. So…

The song playing when we walked in was Bad Company “Shooting Star” And I was air guitaring to keep my hands from shaking. Then it changed to Tiffany “I think we’re alone now”, and Jared did the BOOTY DANCE!!! And I died a little.

Then he gets a phone call. He says “i’m so sorry, it’s the wifey” So he steps back a bit and answers, then he’s talking to his kids and his face is just… he’s so smiley and happy and peaceful. He kept coming back to the line like “i’m so sorry, just a sec” and we were all like “do what you gotta do dude” I could watch him talk on the phone forever.

Then… right next to me Rachel shows up from the back door to say hi. And he drops to his knees and is talking to her, and he’s so focused and loving and they chat and I’m just like “Is this man for real?” He is.

He comes back to line finally and walks towards the giant light and says “I’m Burning up!” And lifts his shirt to fan himself and there it is: Padabelly. I saw his light brown leather belt and a tiny tiny line of his Saxx and I … yeah. Anyway…

So I get up to him and he turns to me and smiles so beautifully and I said “Hi!” And he says “How are ya?” And I said “I’m aldhflUKeglKShg”. A weird squeak comes out and I just lunge at him and bury my face in his chest. So he kinda shrugs and we take a hug picture.

I walked away… I swear to god I have never felt so happy in my whole life. It was like my body was floating on a cloud. My heart was full of cotton candy and unicorns. Jared was so genuine, and enjoying being there and so so happy. And if Jared Padalecki is happy, there is nothing wrong in the world.

We made it back to the hotel room and I burst out singing and dancing “I’ve got everything that I need, right in front of me” And I think I scared April, but it was appropriate. I was so so happy.

More on Jared coming up.

J2 Panel was awesomesauce. I’m sure you’ve all watched it.

J2 Photo Op: I was cool as a fucking cucumber. I walked up to them like “sup, bitches?”. Lol

Jared was closest. He turns and smiles and says “hi!” And I go “Hi again!” And I go over to Jensen and I said, “Could I do the selfie pose, please?” And he seemed kinda annoyed, maybe because I was all smiley with Jared and not him, but whatever. So he signals to Chris and they set up. I pull Jared’s sleeve and he leans his ear down to me and I said, “I got your Bedazzeled reference right away. I was the person laughing.” And he went “Nice!” And laughed that ‘tossing head back’ laugh and I died a little more. I MADE JARED LAUGH!. OK… so we take the picture and then I thank them and I’m out. I LOVE THIS PICTURE SO MUCH! And I got Jensen smoulder!! Yesssss.

OK, so… lots of panels, lots of stuff. Awesome time.

But the end of the evening Sunday, I was totally exhausted and we hadn’t eaten like, all weekend. So I’m delirious. Apparently… tired + hungry = Beka goes Nuts. And in that insanity, I apparently decided that I hate Jensen. He took the brunt of all of my exhaustion. Irrational anger flowed towards that man well into the midnight hour. Just “God, I wanna… grrrrrr…. Fuckin’ Ackles!!” No reason, no explanation, just irrational annoyance with that poor poor man. LOL.

JARED AUTO: In line, there’s like three people crying hysterically and telling him their sob stories and I’m like “OH For Fuck’s Sake” So I turned to Bronwyn and I’m like “I gotta make him laugh” Because I’m just like that. I gotta lighten the mood. So I go up and show him the box. I opened it up and he looks and smiles “oh cool!”. I’m like “could you please sign on Sam’s side?” And there was a little confusion, because the box is the front of Impala, so it’s kind of backwards. So he’s like “here?” and i’m like “no, here” so I reached around it and pointed and he put his hand over mine and was like “Ok, cool” And JARED TOUCHED MY HAND!!

So he signs and I said “Thank you so much for Sam and for all you do.” And he smiled and looked me in the eyes and I go, “I just love you!” And… kissie faced him. As in, I smushed up my lips and blew him three quick kisses. He laughs and smiles and I quickly move away. APPARENTLY as I’m not looking, he kissie faces me back and goes “Love ya!” Of course I missed that. Stupid Beka. lol.

JENSEN AUTO: As I mentioned, I hate him by now. Just… “Goddamn it Jensen” for no reason.

So we get up to him and I hand him the box and I said “Good Evening, sir.” And he says “Hi.” he signs and I go “Thank you.” And walk away. Because… I have nothing to say to him. Lol. Poor Jensen. I kinda want to send him an email like “sorry I hated you for 6 hours for no reason” lol. I can’t even believe myself. I couldn’t look him in the face because he’s so beautiful but damn it, if I didn’t wanna pop him in the nose. Future Reference: EAT AT CON you stupid Beka. EAT. lol

So… That’s that. I will say, now that I’ve eaten and rested a bit, I no longer hate Mr. Ackles. Which is good.

I’m sure I forgot loads of stuff, but that’s what I need to get out right now.

In summary: Jared is exactly what you think he is. He’s light and love and hope and beauty and I will never not be totally in love with him.

And Jensen is Tired!Beka’s arch enemy. Who knew?

;)

#njcon 2017 #frenchy and dreamer do njcon #my con trip

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