#administrator team fortress two

[cawcawrobinjay]

so wait.

if helen is a fake name.

and elizabeth is a fake name, then that just leaves...

[bunshr00m]

we as a fandom need to talk about the sandvich saga more like what do you mean the cast got bored and created this whole series where medic hallucinates that he is dying in the desert and they throw bread crusts at each other and spy has a crisis because he wishes he was a ballet dancer

i love you tf2 cast

[inbarfink]

[night-owl-249]

[Spoiler] For years People theorising, joking and talking about the 10th class

We all though it was him

But this whole time, This. Whole. Time.

It was him. He was here this whole time.

[hbhcgkycuovouoytftof]

Wait, hang on. We learned that Team Fortress was just one of many teams of mercenaries hired to fight and kill over Redmund and Blutarch’s worthless scraps of land. More specifically, they were the worst of the bunch, the losers. It was a suprise to everyone that they were the only ones that Gray's TFC mercs didn’t manage to kill.

Miss Pauling was assigned specifically to Team Fortress. We see that the headquarters of the Administrator’s organization has many employees. All this time it seemed natural to assume that Miss Pauling and The Administrator were a two-woman band of sorts, but now we see there was an entire shadowy organization. In comic issue 7 Miss Pauling speculates that she may be promoted to second-in-command, which implies she is currently lower on the totem pole. Presumably all those other merc teams had their own handlers assigned to them.

And Miss Pauling was assigned to… Team Fortress. The loser team. She was the loser handler. Not only was she not as important to the Administrator as Zephaniah, she wasn’t even her most important employee. Miss Pauling devoted her life to the mission of a woman who truly didn’t give a shit about her. She never would have heard from the Administrator again if any of the other merc teams were successful in recovering the australium.

Damn! I hope she found a nicer lady to simp for.

[ajaxgb]

I'm not even slightly normal about the Administrator's backstory.

LOOK AT THIS FUCKED UP SHIT

She has tortured this man in ghoulish agony for literal centuries. Literally everything that ever happened in the game and comics was to sate her need for revenge and SHE DOESN'T EVEN REMEMBER WHY

Were her parent killed in a break-in? Drowned as aristocrats? Poisoned for their inventions? SHE HAS NO IDEA.

Nothing matters but revenge. Nothing had mattered but revenge since long before Zepheniah died. And not just getting the revenge and then living well! She tried that! She won!

And it wasn't enough!!

She'd bent her life around revenge. It was all she had left. To crush those that wronged her. To destroy everything they loved.

For her entire life, it was the only thing she cared about. How could she move on with that purpose removed? She had everything she could want and absolutely nothing to live for.

And then...

A light in the darkness.

(she's still wearing the noooose oh my god)

TRUE revenge. ETERNAL revenge. The revenge she needed. A revenge she could have and have and have, forever. A monomania she maintained for 150 goddamn years.

150 years of torturing this crusty-ass zombie man(n) because she has literally nothing else going on in her life.

God she's so insane and fucked up (I love her)

[taxiaan-jun]

[catboy-medic-tf2]

ALL THE MERCS + MORE

I also made sure that the gif wasn’t super flashy because while I don’t have the photosensitive version, I do have epilepsy, and seizures can really suck! (the max you can have is about 3 flashes per second i think)

[satanic-worm]

What if I died right now?

Ok but no, seriously. I cried and screamed and hit things. I think I could die happy now, best Smissmas present, happiest holidays!

Not gonna talk about the whole plot of the comic because I was in shock for most of it with the occasional screaming whenever a character appeared, BUT here are some things I loved:

• Zhanna's prosthetic hand and her and Soldier's children.

• Pyro is SO HAPPY to see Engie again.

• My man Tavish having a moment.

• This interaction after Scout's whole speech, it's great.

• Miss Pauling is not doing well, girl can't have a win even when she does.

• The most girl boss ever, like oh wow I mean fucking damn!

• Beautiful evil woman <3

• Everyone flabbergasted and horrified by what they've witnessed.

• THIS moment of Pyro going 'OH SHIT-'

• Medic and Heavy comforting each other (AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH).

• He actually adopted her, I didn't dare hope for something this wholesome but I guess we actually got it.

• Here you can see the moment Bidwell's heart stopped, he was legally dead for three seconds, I checked.

• Heavy converting won to US dollars on the spot (that's the hottest thing I've ever seen), and that beard looks VERY good on him.

And the team Smissmas reunion near the end might have actually killed me.

• Scout is the most Jerma he's ever looked.

• Spy almost saying "I'm your grandfather" (I swear he was gonna) and taking off his mask.

• Everyone bringing their families + the Eyelander, Archimedes, Medic's baboon, and Pyro's fucking dog.

• Merasmus and Tome Jones together forever in the afterlife, love wins.

• Medic's gonna cut the turkey with the bonesaw (smart choice).

I am over the moon and my eyes are burning. Merry Smissmas am I right?

[davidisnotmyname]

MAJOR FUCKING SPOILERS FOR THE SEVENTH COMIC (also this post is really long be warned)

Okay I wanted to give my thoughts on the seventh comic because I, a sleep deprived teenager with absolutely no knowledge on comic making or writing, feel that my opinion is logical and good /s

First off, my immediate reactions to the comic:

OH MY FUCKING GOD THATS A CHILD. THATS SOLDIER’S AND ZHANNA’S CHILD. THATS THEIR BABY. WHAT THE FUCK

the second I saw this shit I knew this comic was gonna give me an aneurysm (in a good way).

waitasecond…

THERESTWOOFTHEMOHMYGOD (also im so fucking happy that the joke I see in fan media a lot about Soldier naming his kids stuff like that is officially canon)(also east meets west fans were eating good this comic)

I like that the comic creators have put so much focus on Spy and Miss Pauling’s relationship. Not only is their dynamic great, but it shows that Spy isn’t a heartless jackass and he not only genuinely cares about the people around him, but can and will show it (I mean most of us knew that already but… someeeee people have fallen victim to the temptations of flanderization)

you’re gonna see this come up a lot in my rambling but I fucking love the shit the mercs are doing in the background, their expressions are so funny: Heavy is sick of their shit

Demo is asleep

Scout can’t breathe

Spy is also sick of their shit

Medic (and that godforsaken baby baboon) is sightseeing

Pyro is having the time of their life

and Sniper and Pauling are just trying to make sure they don’t all fucking crash and die

This is irrelevant as fuck (but most of the stuff I say is) but I just wanted to bring up how much I liked the secretary’s design. It’s very pleasing to look at.

They are like ants to me. I want to put them in a jar with holes in the lid and a bunch of leaves and then roll them down the stairs

I know this might not be what the scene is trying to imply, but fuck yeah, lesbianism (also thank god they gave Scout some semblance of character development, they are very cute as friends)

more background mercs. Medic and Pyro in particular have me in hysterics (this comic has so much good shit I can use for my discord pfp). Also Demoman my belemoman

GOD I FUCKING LOVE THE CHARACTER DESIGNS SO MUCH, thank you young Administrator for reminding me that I am in fact gay in every direction. RIP Admin, she served cunt and died

Get that fucking thing away from me

MAKAMI!!!!! WHAT THE FUCK!!!!! THIS SHIT BELONGS IN THE LOUVRE!!!!!!! THIS IS GENUINELY THE MOST INCREDIBLE PANEL IN ALL OF THE COMICS, I AM AWESTRUCK

Yet again more background mercs. They saw your AO3 history.

okay I was gonna say something but my phone flagged this image as nudity for some fucking reason? What

anyways, as I was saying:

GAY (guys listen it’s canon okay you have to believe me guys wait come back no wait)

also my first thought when I saw this was “heavy is trying to hold him back from doing weird shit to the corpses,” and I don’t care how anyone else interprets it because I am objectively the most correct /j

also looking back at this I’m realizing heavy’s hands are almost the size of medic’s entire torso lmao tf2 isn’t beating the yaoi hand accusations

I’m actually gonna be sick and die oh my god what the fuck is wrong with me

I’m not gonna put all of the panels cuz I feel like it’ll get annoying quick + the image limit, but the whole series of Pauling just standing there as the Admin is cosplaying a Nature Valley Honey and Oats Bar while everyone slowly trickles out of the room just hits so hard and so good. These comics are such a compelling narrative disguised as a series of shitposts and I’m all for it.

MISS P. NAME DROP???!!!!! (Also can we get an F in the chat for all the Francine Pauling truthers)

He is literally her dad I don’t make the rules (also yes I’m aware that it’s stated that he’s her legal guardian literally two panels later so this joke really isn’t funny, but none of my jokes are so what’s your point)

Yet another casual masterpiece by Makami, with the added bonus of the subject being a beautiful hairy old man who’s built like a fucking brick house. Heavy Weapons Guy TF2 I wish you were real. Also bearded heavy goes hard, i need to cook him into a fucking soup oh my god

Hey chat so did you know I’m actually going to be inconsolable for the next three years. Also this is obviously photoshopped we all know his last name is Elbertson (no but seriously I actually started running around my room and rolling on the floor when I got to yet another name drop)

Okay, I need to either say this now or have it fester in my psyche for eternity. That haircut gave me physical and psychic damage when I first saw it. Scout tf2, you’re ugly as shit but that’s honestly poggers, welcome to the club man (also oh my god he looks so much like Jerma I’m screaming, but Jerma isn’t ugly though I promise I would never diss my king like that)

Nobody talk to me

I SAID NOBODY FUCKING TALK TO ME

spy with his granddaughter, he loves her so much but still can’t bring himself to reveal who he truly is. I actually can’t fucking do this anymore this comic is gonna have me keel over and die of a heart attack

That’s it. Get in the fucking wood chipper right now /j seriously though I can’t even begin to explain how much this scene means to me. Spydad was one of the main things that got me so interested in tf2 over a year ago, and seeing him and Scout not only being civil about it, but genuinely caring about each other is everything. I’ve never been one for spydad angst (no shade if you do like it, I just personally prefer happier stuff), so I’m glad that this was the route the comics took with that plot point.

also don’t think I’m not gonna bring up the fucking mask. after seventeen years, we finally have spy’s face. Not only that, but the reveal was done through him giving it to his granddaughter. It’s done in such a casual and sweet way but it’s so impactful. He can be vulnerable around these people. This man, who’s spent his life building up walls around himself, refusing to let anyone through to the point of wearing that stinky ass balaclava everywhere, can now freely live as himself with his son and grandchildren. I’m gonna start eating screws I swear to god.

oh fuck I hit image limit hang on I have a little bit more to say check the reblogs the rest of my descent into madness will be present there shortly.

[here-comes-astro]

*those* tf2 players complaining about 'new fandom' & 'woke stuff' will never make sense to me cause in this game you already have:

1- a black/non-white person in the main character cast who isn't the butt of constant racist jokes

2- women in positions of power + ones that are very important to the story

3- a character whose gender is unconfirmed

4- various disabled characters [though one in particular is debatable, i guess]

5- a̶c̶c̶u̶r̶a̶t̶e̶ m̶e̶n̶t̶a̶l̶ i̶l̶l̶n̶e̶s̶s̶ r̶e̶p̶r̶e̶s̶e̶n̶t̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶

6- an implied to be/canonically lesbian character

[cawcawrobinjay]

[karangellc]

I'm so back

[kataqasis]

life has a funny way.

[troublemakergalaxy]

okay the sequence of the administrator getting progressively really old frame by frame was cool as hell.

[inbarfink]

My own personal favorite answer to the still-unanswered question of 'why the hell are there two 'Team Fortress' both populated with seemingly identical people living seemingly identical lives' is still probably the idea that the Administrator hired 9 mercenaries and then cloned them to fill out both the RED and BLU team.

Like, yeah, I fully admit that it raises a few of it's own unanswered questions (For how long did that cloning technology exist? Did Team Fortress Classic went through the same procedure? What happened to the extra 4.5 mercenaries of each team once Mann vs. Machine and the Comics era happen? Did the Administrator just had them disposed while Gray Mann was on the move for the sake of protecting yet another one of her secrets?) but I also feel like it ties very well thematically with the point of the Administrator's scheme in "The Days Have Worn Away". The most vital part of her revenge is making sure RED and BLU are forever evenly-matched, and that's important enough that she will invest in secret cloning technology and however much shenanigans it takes to ensure neither the mercs nor any of their loved ones realize there's two of each of them running around for the sake of the teams being truly identical.

Also, yeah, it does mean that, like, either the Mercenaries had some sort of Dramatic Clone Reveal that happened totally off-screen at some point during the MvM or Comic-Era and we the readers just totally missed it (Even if all of the Comic-Era Mercs are the originals, realizing that you've spent years of your life fighting your own clone and that they've been also living 50% of your time off with your family is pretty fucked-up) .... or that the Mercs just went on living their lives and never put the pieces together there was some Secret Clone Scheme in the first place...

...But honestly, I think both the idea of Team Fortress never figuring out about the clones, and the idea of Team Fortress figuring it out but getting over it so comically quickly it never comes up again in their misadventures feel so very hilariously in-character for me that I count it as a point in favor of the theory in a way.

Y'know, the idea of the Administrator secretly running both teams was also originally framed as a Mind-Blowing Secret That She Must Keep Secret from the Mercs

And by the end of the comics, the Team either straight up never came to the realization that their old 'enemies' were working for the same employer.... or the realized it at some point during the MvM/Comic Era but it mattered so little to them it never came up on-screen.

And also, I think it's kinda hilarious to think about the concept of like, Merasmus being roommates with the RED Solider

Until he probably got of tired of his shit off-screen and moved to a new apartment............. only to end up with the BLU Solider

And then he moved again.............................. only to find himself with the RED Solider again

I am pretty sure Merasmus is the only person in the TF2 Universe outside of the Administrator and Pauling to know there are two of each Mercenary running around. But he's not bothered by the ethical or philosophical implications of this clone scheme, he is just eternally tormented by the existence of Double Solider.