#adding that tag to see what happens lol i think the gays would enjoy seeing a frogue

[its-roachii]

second layer on frogue oil painting >:)

idk how traditional art will do on here lol but have a frog

[sorikkung]

what goes on in neverland. ⇝ ch. 3: conversations, conversations, camboys?

word count: 9.8k

pairings: transmasc!reader x Everyone, everyone x everyone (its literally too convoluted for me to try type them out here anymore just see the masterlist for full pairings LOL)

genre: fluff, smut and lots of assorted shenanigans. hijinks, if you will

au: battle of the bands!au but make it gay and horny

warnings: adults talking abt their feelings, mutual masturbation, camming, bondage, remote controlled toys, edging, ruined orgasms, boys crying, cum swallowing but its realistic

a/n: the jump between me taking half a year to update to months to two within the same months??? progress is real guys. anyway we're finally delving into another pov this chapter how exciting!! a lot goin on, a lot of set up here i hope you guys are as excited as i am for what it leads to 🤭

please reblog and leave feedback if you enjoyed, it’s what keeps us writers going :’) (for every comment i get i open up a wip and write a few sentences. thats not bribery but literally just how motivating it is.)

tags: @honeybyunnies @syunderful @absentcaryatid @mingirn (lmk if you want to be added/removed!)

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>you: i got some mad fucking tea to spill are you ready

>mingi’s bitch: omg bet come over

>you: aight @energeric where r u

>you: ???

Figuring you’d just meet him at the couple’s apartment, you slip some shoes on and grab your keys from the hooks in your doorway to leave, only to find the very man you were pinging grabbing his to do the same.

“Oh, did you see the texts then?” you ask, figuring he’d be going too, but then it strikes you that he probably would’ve started pestering you for details already before you even made it to their apartment.

“No, I’m– I’m heading out. Gonna hit the gym with a buddy.” He pauses mid-way through slipping on his shoes and tying the laces to look up at you. “What happened? Dude, your cheek is bruising, are you becoming the same kinda painslut as Wooyoung is or did you get into a fight?”

“Got clocked in the face by Changbin at the food court with Wooyo today, but it’s what his boyfriend texted me afterward that I’m gonna go discuss with him– you should come, the tea is piping hot.”

He shakes his head, hastily finishing tying off his laces and getting up. “Nah, I don’t wanna leave my friend waiting, he’s already there. If you can’t brief it in a maximum of maybe four and a half sentences, it’s gotta wait.”

You snort. “What the fuck is half a sentence meant to look like?”

“And you just used one. Three and a half, go.”

“Changbin’s boyfriend is hot and Felix is still definitely in love with you.”

For a moment, Eric doesn’t say anything at all. He just stares at you, unblinking, and you expect his eyes to widen or his brows to raise or show any inkling of surprise after a few seconds, but he doesn’t. For once you can’t read the dark clouds in his eyes, though you know he’s definitely having some sort of emotional reaction to the news, but he simply turns to grab his keys as if you didn’t say a thing.

“Cool.”

“Cool?” It stumps you, how normal he’s acting when you’re positive he’s feeling anything but. He’s a man who wears his heart on his sleeve and doesn’t hide how he feels, so the way he’s been acting in regards to Felix raises a few questions. Granted, you didn’t expect him to go running back to him – or maybe you did, just partially – but you certainly expected more than that. “That’s it? I thought you still liked him.”

He sighs deeply through his mouth and twirls his keys around his finger idly while standing in the doorway. “Why would I? Yes, I still like him. Maybe a part of me always will. But he’s the one who broke up with me because he didn’t have time for me. Now I see where that time went, and frankly, I don’t think I have time for him either. I too would rather focus on the people I care about. I don’t care if he still loves me. If he really, truly did, as much as I loved him? He’d do a better job at showing it.”

“That’s… fair,” you sound out slowly, nodding. It makes perfect sense, and in hindsight if he’d jumped at the opportunity first you might have even warned him for being too hasty for that very reason. “Don’t worry, he’ll see what he’s missing. We’ll wipe the floor with him and all of his friends.”

Eric gives you a nod and a half smile that doesn’t reach his eyes, then bids you goodbye and heads off. How abrupt, you think. You’ll probably come back to that one later.

There are many benefits to dating Jung Wooyoung, Mingi finds. One of them is that it can never really get boring. Everything about Wooyoung is exciting, and he tries to share that with Mingi as much as possible, whether that be spicing up what they try out in the bedroom or taking him on all sorts of wild adventures for dates, or just always having something going on exciting enough to talk about even on their lazy days.

Today is no exception; he sits on their couch in just his sweatpants, while Wooyoung lies draped across his lap in only his t-shirt. Not his own, but Mingi’s, naturally, and he’s already accepted he won’t get it back until it stops smelling like him. When today’s excitement – you, of course – strolls in and gives them a knowing look, he shakes his head before even greeting you.

“We weren’t fucking this time. Though if you took any longer we might’ve!”

It certainly wouldn’t be the first time you’ve walked in on them in more provocative positions, if that were the case – most times these days, they don’t bother to stop at the interruption, and more often than not you’re quick to join in on the fun anyway. It’s not unheard of, however, for you – or any of the other band members, for that matter – to pass on joining in and merely scroll on their phone or read a book or snack while in the very same room as the deed is being done, but nobody really minds. It’s just a thing that happens, at this point, just as normal as eating or playing video games. You all prefer it that way.

Hell, Mingi is a huge fan of the concept. It didn’t take Wooyoung very long to figure out how much he enjoys showing off, so as soon as his days of being a little shyer and more self-conscious fell behind him in favour of his newfound confidence in his sex appeal and comfort with the band, he became quite the tease when he has an audience. Perhaps that’s why he was all too keen to let Wooyoung drag him down the corridor Changbin went down at the battle of the bands and start making out with him on the spot, knowing – no, even better, hoping – the other man would be watching.

“Without me? How cruel.” You’re quick to join them on the couch, cuddling into Mingi’s side and allowing Wooyoung to sprawl across your lap as well. They both silently appreciate how you fit so easily into their lives as to not even need so much as a greeting when you arrive at their apartment. It’s your home as much as theirs, probably helped by how the whole band lives in the same apartment complex, albeit different floors. At this point, you might as well all be roommates. “Though I suppose I’ll be the crueller one, considering I’m gonna be having a threesome with Changbin and his hot boyfriend and you’re not invited.”

“What?!” Wooyoung jolts up off your laps, staring at you like you just grew a second head. “Why the fuck not? After I sucked the soul out of him that one time? Damn, he has no idea what he’s missing, I’ve only gotten better since.”

“Actually, he kinda does,” you chuckle, taking his place across his and Mingi’s laps so you can cheerily grin up at him and poke your tongue out. “Little birdy told me it was, to this day, the best head he’s ever had. Not that he’d ever admit it.”

“Wait a second, who was the little birdy? Changbin or Minho?” Mingi asks, idly tapping his fingers on your back while the gears turn in his head. Truly, excitement follows Wooyoung wherever he goes — he doesn’t even need to try.

“Minho. We’re Instagram mutuals now, apparently. He had soooo much juicy tea for me. Like how the reason Changbin is gonna deny all your advances is because he’s been in love with you since high school but doesn’t wanna admit it, even to himself.”

Wooyoung freezes, and Mingi freezes at Wooyoung freezing. Mingi doesn’t know the full details of Wooyoung and Changbin’s history beyond being best friends in high school with another friend who went back to Korea — Yeonjun, Mingi thinks his name was — and that the three of them helped each other experiment and realise that they all liked boys. It sounded very casual, and Mingi figured that makes sense; Wooyoung was one of the key players in opening the band up with each other more physically, and, by extension, his relationship with Mingi. Wooyoung is just the kinda guy who likes being physically and sexually affectionate with his friends, and that didn’t bother him. Not when he enjoyed it almost just as much. In many ways, Wooyoung was the reason Mingi could come so far outside his shell. He’d forever be grateful to him for that.

It takes Wooyoung a good, long moment to remember to breathe again before he bursts out laughing, loud and wide and unfiltered in all the ways Mingi just can’t help but fall for. He isn’t sure what is so inherently hilarious about Changbin’s feelings for him, but he doesn’t realise he’s grinning goofily until you give him a very particular smirk that he’s awfully familiar with. The ‘You’re so damn whipped it’s written all over your face’ smirk. But who in their right mind can blame him? At least, that’s what he thinks to himself while his lover takes a moment to recover.

“No way,” he says at last, “Changbin? In love with me after all these years? Oh, that’s rich. You don’t think- you don’t think that’s the real reason they joined the battle of the bands, is it? To see me again?”

“You and your massive ego,” Mingi huffs, nudging him in the shoulder. “I mean, possibly? I feel like it’s more likely that they’re tryna suck JYP’s dick. But that and Felix possibly holding some resentment for Eric and doing it out of spite might be part of it too.”

“Nah, Felix doesn’t resent Eric,” you inform him, “He’s still in love with him. Did Wooyoung not fill you in? That’s why Changbin was all like, ‘just because Felix still likes Eric doesn’t mean you can use him like that!’ It’s kinda the whole reason I got clocked in the face, which was lucky for your boyfriend’s pretty face because if I wasn’t there, it would’ve been him.”

“He didn’t really fill me in, no,” Mingi pouts, shouldering him again, but Wooyoung only scoffs and shoulders him back. “He was too busy telling me all about how hot Changbin was in a fitted t-shirt and how you went flying across a table to really elaborate on the why. Also how hot that Minho guy is and how he seemed down for the double date, so I’m wondering why all of a sudden we’re not invited to the gangbang!”

“Pfft. It’s- Just read the texts.” You unlock your phone and shove it in his hands to save yourself more explaining. Wooyoung snatches it from you before Mingi can grab it, so he simply leans over his shoulder to read without further complaint.

>lino.ooo: i wish he’d understand that being attracted to other people doesn’t mean i love him any less

>lino.ooo: but him accepting that would mean accepting he has feelings for people who aren’t me either 🤭

Mingi reads this and his first instinct is to look at Wooyoung’s face. Wooyoung, eyes adorably wide and almost trying to shove his face into the screen with how invested into these texts he is. The puzzle starts to piece itself together in Mingi’s brain, sneaking suspicions he hasn’t accepted enough to address yet, but he can’t help but feel for Minho’s situation.

>lino.ooo: but i’ve been dating him for a couple years now, and i’ve been his friend even longer, i know the signs. i know what he looks like when hes in love with someone, because he’s like that with me, too

That makes him look at Wooyoung once again, analysing every detail on his stupidly perfect face, and that’s when it really clicks. Mingi feels for Minho because it’s too easy for him to imagine himself in similar shoes – possibly because he’s already standing in them. And possibly has been for a long time now.

He thinks back to how their open relationship all started; how you and Sunwoo had been best friends with benefits since your last year of high school before you dropped out and ran away without him, anyway, and Eric since not long after, jokingly justifying your relationship with there being ‘nothing wrong with kissing the homies goodnight.’ It was an inside joke at first, one followed by obnoxious PDA between your trio or Mingi and Wooyoung calling themselves ‘totally platonic homies’ despite having been dating for a while, but somewhere down the line you had all started actually giving each other goodnight kisses.

He thinks about San, who used to blush such a pretty pink at the gesture, and how he couldn’t help himself turning a chaste peck on the lips to a kiss that lingered, hands that wandered – next thing he knows, Wooyoung is running to him saying he fucked up, genuine fear in his eyes, quick to confess how his goodnight kiss with San escalated to making out against a wall and how it all happened so fast and he stopped it as soon as she realised he was enjoying it too much for a goodnight kiss and ran to Mingi first thing to come clean. He had apologised so vehemently that day, like he was really, truly scared he would lose his lover for such a careless mistake; Mingi then wonders how much of that fear lies beyond the simple kiss.

How much of it was the feelings San made him feel that scared him so.

He decides to keep these thoughts to himself for the time being. After all, maybe he’s simply overthinking again, comparing himself to the other rapper now that he’s come and changed up the scene. Wooyoung has a type, it seems. Thick lips, broad shoulders, reckless confidence, and spits fire on the mic. He wonders how long it’ll be before he inevitably falls for Sunwoo, too. He fits the type to a T. Maybe he already has, actually, he isn’t too sure – but he’s far surer that the way he looks at you, San and Changbin, isn’t the way people usually look at their platonic friends. Or their former friends who they haven’t seen in years and desperately want to get in the pants of and show off to.

Mingi remains quiet.

“Well, I think our next plan of attack is rather obvious,” Wooyoung hums, barely concealing his excitement. However, neither you nor Mingi seem to follow, so you wait for him to realise and elaborate. “Like… if he doesn’t even realise he’s in love with me, we gotta make sure he does.”

“What is that even supposed to mean?” Mingi ponders aloud, raising an inquisitive eye at Wooyoung. He stares back at him.

“Exactly what it sounds like? We need to make Changbin realise he’s in love with me whether he likes it or not. Like, he’s in love with me, that’s so exciting? This whole time? I was literally his gay awakening, I gotta remind him how he got to this point in the first place.” Wooyoung states it like it’s the most obvious thing in the world, but Mingi simply blinks, then cuts you off before you can say anything.

“Why?”

That renders both of you silent, and it’s only then when Wooyoung and you seem to finally notice the seriousness of Mingi’s expression, the atmosphere sobering up so quickly it gives him whiplash.

“B-Because… come on, it’ll be fun! What’re you looking so serious for, I'm not the one in love with him! I think I just get a sick sense of satisfaction from it. Plus, he’s hot, you’ve already agreed with me that much, do you not want to make him squirm a little?”

Mingi only frowns harder. It’s true, they already discussed bringing Changbin and even Minho into the bedroom if the opportunity presented itself, but this wasn’t quite the opportunity he was thinking about. If Wooyoung sleeps with someone who he knows likes him like that, wouldn’t that be more than just a casual fling? Why would he want to engage when he knows feelings are involved already? Mingi thinks he knows the answer.

It begs the question, considering when it was brought up they never defined what ‘messing with’ other people implied. Mingi figured they were on the same page in it meaning just having sex or touching or kissing, but now he wonders if he missed something. “How far does our ethical non-monogamy go?”

“What are you–“

“Wooyoung, you’re really excited to hear that your old best friend likes you like that… what’s so exciting about it? You have me already.”

“What? I’m not excited, I just–” Wooyoung flounders at the accusation, bumping you out of the way so he can crawl half on top of Mingi, so he sees just how serious he is. Like the physical closeness would bridge the gap slowly forming. “Jagiya, that’s not what this is at all. I haven’t felt like that about Changbin since I was like, seventeen–“

“So you admit you did once have feelings for him, then?”

“Woah, woah! What is with that accusatory tone? Mingi, I’m not going anywhere. I’m yours, only yours.” He grabs both of his boyfriend’s hands in his, clasping them tightly while he looks in his eyes, wavering. It’s almost uncomfortable to watch. “There’s no competition. Whatever feelings I had for him back then are long gone now, it’s really just a sex thing, like we have with the band, that’s all it is! You know you’re the only one for me, you know I wasn’t even interested in settling down before you, that’s how much you mean to me. I’m yours, first and foremost, no one else’s. However else I get my dick wet doesn’t matter, it– it doesn’t change that. What we have is so much more than that.”

It’s definitely uncomfortable for you to watch now, evident in the way you try to awkwardly shuffle away from them. If Wooyoung notices anything off he doesn’t mention it, gazing almost unblinkingly into Mingi’s eyes in hopes it’ll make him feel his sincerity, but the only sincerity Mingi feels in that moment is Wooyoung’s sincerity to himself. Like he’s trying to convince himself of this just as much as him.

He can’t just tell him that, though. Who is he to tell his boyfriend which of his feelings are real or not? Who is he to say he’s deluding himself? That would be borderline gaslighting if he did, but he can’t ignore the signs that are becoming increasingly obvious the longer he stews on them. He speaks in Korean next in hopes that you won’t catch the meaning of his words.

“Your ears go red when you lie, Wooyoung.”

His mouth opens to say something, then shuts, then again, soundlessly appearing almost like a gaping fish. You don’t stay to hear more, quickly and wordlessly grabbing your phone back from where it had fallen to the couch in Wooyoung’s surprise and trying to make as little noise as possible on your way out to not disturb them. Mingi doesn’t blame you; all of a sudden the air in the room feels awfully stuffy and borderline suffocating, but he has to face this head-on, or else Wooyoung will be lightly dancing around the topic until it escalates.

“I’m not lying,” Wooyoung mumbles, his voice small and caught in his throat. “Is that really what you think I’m like?”

“I– Look, Wooyoung, I’m not going to tell you how you do or don’t feel, I just… Minho’s texts felt kind of relatable when he was talking about how he noticed how his boyfriend looks at other men because he knows what his in love look, looks like. I saw the way you look at Changbin and it just… reminded me of that. But I also see the way you look at them, too,” he gestures towards the door where you just made your escape, “and San. Honestly, I can argue for all of the band, but those two in particular, you look at them the exact same way you look at me. And I just… don’t know what I’m supposed to do about that. How I’m supposed to feel about that.”

Wooyoung shakes his head slowly, almost in disbelief. “There’s nothing to feel about. I meant what I said–“

It’s the denial that gets him. Maybe it wouldn’t sting so much if he just came clean and confessed it, admitted to feeling things for other people, and maybe they could talk about it and what it meant for their relationship, but if he can’t realise it himself they won’t get anywhere. And the more he tries to deny it, the more he digs himself into a hole that only highlights Mingi’s very suspicions.

“No you didn’t. Is that really all the band is to you? Just another way to get your dick wet?”

He pauses, settling back down on his legs as the weight of his words finally sink in. “No, I… of course they’re more than that, they’re... I probably shouldn’t’ve said that in front of him, I’ll– I’ll have to apologise to him later.”

Mingi nods. “Yeah, you should. Like, aren’t we constantly going on about how platonic love is just as meaningful as romantic love? Isn’t that why we’re as close with the band as we are? Saying that what we have is so much more than that just because its romantic is so diminishing. That’s how I know you don’t mean it – you don’t believe that, do you? That’s against everything we both believe in.”

“Well, yes, but–“ he gnaws on the inside of his cheek, trying to formulate a response. “I guess I panicked? I just don’t want you thinking after all we’ve been through together that I’m gonna be into Changbin now all of a sudden just because he likes me. As far as romantic love goes, I just want you. I don’t want anything to change that, to change what we have.”

“We don’t have to change anything,” Mingi reminds him calmly, hands smoothing over the smaller man’s thighs in a soothing motion. “I just want you to be honest with me, and honest with yourself. I won’t be mad at you if you like other people because I know you love me, I just… want you to be able to tell me. To trust me.”

Wooyoung nods silently, slowly at first, then frantically. “I-I will. I’m sorry, Mingi.”

“What are you apologising for?”

“I–“ He falls flat. “I don’t know.”

“Then don’t apologise,” Mingi reassures him with the faintest of smiles, cupping his face and pulling him in for a gentle kiss. “Well, maybe do apologise, just not to me. I apologise for putting you on the spot like that.”

Wooyoung chases his lips after the first kiss, hands slipping around the back of his neck and pulling him in, kissing him deeply and sending tingles down Mingi’s spine. They’re both just so handsy, grabbing at whatever they can reach, Wooyoung drawing closer into Mingi’s lap to close the distance between them, so they can hold each other while they kiss like this. Mingi is honestly content to simply kiss him like that for hours on end, but Wooyoung seems to have other plans as their kisses grow hotter and their hands wander further, teeth digging into lips and nails digging into skin.

When he breaks apart, it’s to slip down Mingi’s lap and onto the floor on his knees, spreading Mingi’s legs apart and reaching for the band of his sweatpants. On his knees for him in nothing but his shirt, Mingi knows he’ll never not be affected by such a sight – if it isn’t old by now it probably never will be, and Mingi finds comfort in that. He likes knowing his boyfriend has him wrapped around his pinkie finger, and that he’ll never fail to drive him wild. It’s safe, secure, how his heart beats for him.

“Let me show you exactly how much you mean to me,” Wooyoung murmurs, low and sultry, but it has the opposite of the intended effect. Mingi tenses up, grabbing both of Wooyoung’s wrists on instinct, then pushes them away from him. The flash of distress on Wooyoung’s face doesn’t slide past him, but he doesn’t have it in him to feel too guilty about it.

“Wooyoung,” he breathes out, not letting go of his wrists. “How is this any different? How is having sex with me proving how much I mean to you when you just said all your relationships with other men are just about sex? What kind of message are you giving me with this?”

How Mingi’s heart beats for Wooyoung is safe. He knows that no matter what happens, that will never change – it will always beat for him. That much he is sure of.

Whether Wooyoung is the same, however, he is not.

His mistake seems to crash down on him all at once, and he slips his hands free and back to his sides as he scrambles to his feet in panic. “No, no, I didn’t mean–“

“Just… stop,” Mingi sighs, running a hand through his hair. He’s tired. He doesn’t want to wrestle with – whatever this is that they’re wrestling with – any longer. “I don’t wanna go in circles again, can we just… cuddle?”

Wooyoung is eager to oblige, grabbing a throw blanket off the couch and curling up to Mingi’s side with a quickness he only ever really sees from him on-stage, but he's visibly relieved at the change of topic though guilt still lingers on his features. Mingi turns on the tv; white noise at this point, to leave him alone with his thoughts. Well, not too alone, with Wooyoung in his arms, but he likes it that way. Maybe a small part of him fears that if he lets go, he’ll lose him – but mostly, he just enjoys having him close, even when they’re not the happiest with each other. They’ll get through this.

He leans his head atop the crown of his lover’s, not before pressing a quick kiss to the top. Wooyoung buries his face in his shoulder, returning the kiss to his bare skin, and in that moment, that is all Mingi needs.

That’s enough excitement for one day.

It’s only when you finally get back to your apartment and shut the door behind you do you finally feel like you can breathe again, far away from the stuffiness of the couple’s apartment and the thick tension between them as they fought right in front of you. Not the first time they had done so, and you are usually comfortable enough in their home to just scroll on your phone on their couch until they’re done, but you’re not sure you’ve witnessed a fight quite so personal between them before. Besides, it’s not like you had anything planned for staying longer, so it felt easier to get out of there as soon as you can rather than wait it out as a spectator and hope they’d feel up to sex or video games or going for a cheeky fast-food run in the aftermath.

Sunwoo is sprawled across the couch when you arrive, and he raises his eyebrow at you over his shoulder when he notices the loud exhale at finally arriving home.

“What, did your gossip sesh with Woogi not go so well?” he jokes, but when you plop yourself across his lap, staring up at the ceiling with a humourless chuckle back, he figures he’s probably exactly right.

“Yeah, you could say that.”

“Wanna talk about it?” He turns off his phone and slips it back into his hoodie pocket to give you his full attention, so you sigh.

“So the goss is that Felix is in love with Eric still, which I already told him and he doesn’t wanna do anything about it, which is fine, and then the other part was that Changbin has been pining over Wooyoung since high school. Which is like, a long ass time to be pining over someone you’ve barely seen since, but it’s enough that his boyfriend noticed – oh yeah, I’m leaving out details again. So Changbin ran into me and Wooyoung at the food court and punched me in the face–“

“–he what?! –“

“–yeah full-on sent me falling over a table, it was hot– yeah and then in a last ditch attempt for him to not like, literally knock my lights out in the middle of the plaza, I complimented his muscles and fed his ego enough for him to be too busy preening to deck me, and then his boyfriend came in. Lee Minho, or Lino apparently is his stage name, and he grabbed my ass, put a metaphorical leash on his boyfriend and basically said we had a point and then plugged Stray Kids’ Instagram, to which obviously I had to stalk, and then I followed his account because he has three really cute cats and we started dm-ing and– here I’ll just show you the messages.”

Sunwoo is straight-up laughing by the time you finish your tale, grabbing your phone from you as you pull up the direct messages with the eccentric man. “You know, just because you’re a rapper doesn’t mean you have to exercise that breath control when telling a story, take it from me.”

“This is how I normally talk!” That draws an exasperated giggle from you, and that’s enough to ease some of the tension that was weighing on your shoulders from the argument. “Basically, you’ll see what I’m talking about when you scroll down to it, but basically I told all this to Wooyoung and he was like, ‘If Changbin has feelings for me and doesn’t even notice I gotta make him notice,’ which for obvious reasons made Mingi a little uncomfortable, because why would he care about his crush on him if he’s already happily taken anyway? So he asked how far their ethical non-monogamy is meant to go and Wooyoung got all defensive and basically said that Mingi is his everything and everyone else is just how he gets his dick wet but doesn’t compare to him, and honestly… that one kinda stung a little.”

Sunwoo visibly winces at that, looking away from the messages to make sure you are okay. “Ouch.”

“Yeah.” You huff, sinking further into the couch and mentally hoping it absorbs you completely. “I dunno it was just so… tense for that moment there. Felt like there was a lot to unpack. Mingi seemed to think so, too, because then he just switched to speaking in Korean and I took that as my cue to leave.”

“Do you remember what he said?” Sunwoo offers helpfully; you aren’t fluent in Korean by any means, but being friends with a whole band of Korean speakers and roommates with two of them forces you to pick some basics up over the years. Especially with Sunwoo practically acting as Eric’s personal tutor, as the latter didn’t learn to speak it growing up but was familiar enough with it for it to be easier for him to learn. Similarly, Kevin never learned it at home either, but was a lot better at self-studying than you were and had also been learning for a lot longer – you had only decided to really commit to it after moving in with the boys and hearing how much they would practice at home.

“I recognised the main words, I think. ‘You’, ‘red’, ‘ears’, and ‘lie’. Lying maybe? It doesn’t take a genius to figure out where that was going, though.”

Sunwoo nods, reaching down to play with your hair in a motion you think is supposed to be comforting. It does help. “That’s pretty awkward. How do you feel about it? What are you thinking?”

It’s in times like these when Sunwoo’s maturity shines through; while usually he’s one of the first to goof off and tease or get fired up and in his feelings, in contrast, he can often be very objective with other people’s issues.

“I feel… weird. Like I saw something I probably wasn’t meant to see,” you start with a sigh. It’s hard to place exactly what you’re feeling at first. “It was kind of… disheartening? The way Wooyoung talked about him and Mingi. I don’t know how to explain it, it was just so… uncomfortable. How he kept saying Mingi is basically like, above the rest of us, when I thought we all agreed that romantic relationships shouldn’t be the be-all-or-end-all of human connection because other bonds can be just as strong, but he kept emphasizing how what they have is so special and how he’s Mingi’s and no one else’s, and it’s like… what does that make us? I know he’s not our boyfriend, but I like to think we’re a lot more to him than just friends who get his dick wet.”

Sunwoo mulls it over for a moment, then stills the movements of his hands to give you a steadfast look.

“Do you want us to be more than friends?”

The question kicks your heartbeat into overdrive, suddenly picking up like you’re being chased by an unseen beast that could snuff you out at a moment’s notice. You try not to let that alarm show, but you have the gut feeling that Sunwoo picks up on it, at least on your hesitance to respond, so you open your mouth to say something before it looks like your silence has more meaning to it.

“No– yes? I mean, aren’t we already more than friends, in a way? Friends don’t usually do what we do. Is there not an in between friendship and dating? Since when were we the types to be stuck in singular boxes and labels, huh?”

Sunwoo doesn’t seem to buy it, shifting beneath your weight so you sit up to let him adjust his position and get more comfortable. What you don’t expect, is for him to instead swiftly cage you between him and the couch, towering over you with his eyes boring into yours. He doesn’t touch you, his hands placed firmly on either side of your head, but the proximity makes it feel like his whole weight is pushing down on you.

He says your name unwaveringly. “If friendship is just as strong and important as romance, why do you not want to consider us just as friends?”

Your voice gets caught in your throat. You want to ask why he has to be so, so close to ask you such a question, but the time it takes to gather your wits to reply is probably exactly the reason. You can’t lie to him like this, you can’t bluff or flounder or get anything past him. When he looks into your eyes like this, he sees everything beneath him, and in that moment, you feel more naked before him than you ever have been even without the presence of clothes.

“I… because it feels weird to call you guys my friends. Cause I have other friends, I’ve had close friends with benefits, too, but you guys are just… different. It feels different. You guys aren’t on the same level as people I call my friends,” you explain, hoping that it makes even a lick of sense, but you fear now that you’ve said it out loud it only serves to prove Sunwoo’s point.

Do you want to date them? You’ve been bouncing the idea around in your mind for a few years now, and you still don’t have a clear answer. When you first met San and Kevin, the answer was yes. For Wooyoung and Mingi, it was an ‘if only,’ but they were fresh in their relationship at the time, so you figured they were off-limits. Eric and Sunwoo you had figured any attraction to them was just physical and a result of you messing around with them while also developing a meaningful friendship beyond being an experiment or a booty call, but that didn’t necessarily mean you wanted to date them.

But as the band formed and you all grew closer, they quickly became the most important people in your lives by a long shot, people you’re closer with than you ever have been with anyone else, and that’s uncharted waters. Throwing sexual attraction into the mix only further muddies them, because is it that you’re attracted to them as a person in a romantic sense, or you’re attracted to them and the fact that you’re close to them as people and care for them deeply seem inherently romantic through that lens? Is it possible to be attracted to someone physically and love them platonically? Your logic tells you yes, of course, queerplatonic relationships of all kinds exist, but you’ve gotten to the point where you don’t know the difference anymore. Not when this type of relationship is all you’ve ever known, and you’ve enjoyed them too much to bother trying to pursue anything romantic with anyone. After all, explaining to any possible romantic interest that you don’t plan on stopping sleeping with your entire band and whoever else strikes your fancy, and that you and your band are so incredibly close and live together and spend basically all your spare time together, doesn’t usually score you any second dates.

It's not like that has bothered you much, though, perfectly content with what you have with them – they know you far better than any romantic interests ever have, so why would you bother when you already have almost everything you could ask for in a connection? But that only sounds like you’re already dating them, or at least treating it like you are but dodging the big scary ‘label’ question to not frighten them off and burst your bubble.

“You’re thinking really hard right now,” Sunwoo comments, smirking as he analyses your face. Why is he smirking? What does he think he just won? You can’t read his at all. What you do know is if he doesn’t just close the distance and kiss you already you might just explode, but he’s determined on running his mouth and for once in your life you feel helpless to stop him. He’d see right through your attempts at distraction. “Are you finally putting two and two together? Because what I see, is that Wooyoung talking about Mingi as the only one for him made you uncomfortable because you don’t want Mingi to be the only one for him. You want him to be ours, isn’t that right? You want him to be yours, too.”

You feel like the slightest slip of the tongue will end in instant regret, your last coherent thought fizzling out. “Are you trying to tease me right now, Sunwoo? I’m being serious.”

“So am I.” He moves one hand to pinch your chin between his thumb and index finger, making sure you can’t look away from his steadfast gaze. “Dead serious. Do you want to date us? Be romantic with us, tell us those three words you’ve been too scared to say for too long, take us on dates that are explicitly dates, call us yours? Is that what you want?”

How are you even meant to answer such a question? Do you? Don’t you? What would happen if you said yes? Or no? Your head is swimming – if the energy at Wooyoung and Mingi’s apartment felt suffocating, the tension now felt like walking a tightrope with a blindfold on. One wrong step, one wrong breath and you plummet to your untimely demise, but the tightrope you tread on is merely a thread and may snap at any moment regardless.

He says your name again, calling your attention back to him, awaiting an answer.

You don’t have one for him.

The door swings open so violently it bangs against the wall, San bursting in with a shout and his laptop in hand, screen facing toward you, and the most positively mind-blown expression on his face.

“You guys won’t fucking believe what I just found–! Oh. Uh.” His voice is booming until it’s not, dropping to the lowest of volumes once he sees you and Sunwoo’s position on the couch and the seriousness on your faces. Both you and Sunwoo break that contact to look at him in surprise, his equally surprised face staring right back at you. It’s laughable, even, how San has walked in on far less innocent interactions between you guys before, but it seems that even at a moments notice he can feel the thickness of the tension in the room. “Should I uh. Should I come back later? Am I interrupting something?”

You want to say yes, but it’s not like you had an answer for Sunwoo anyway. You suspect Sunwoo will tell him to leave so he can continue drilling you in private, but instead his attention catches on to whatever’s on San’s laptop. It’s porn, which isn’t very surprising, but Sunwoo cuts off whatever he was about to reply and narrows his eyes.

“Is that… Hyunjin?”

San is thrilled to launch into his story about how he was looking into camming as a potential source of income as he may or may not be about to get fired from the Snack Falcon he worked at after one too many shifts of just clocking on and leaving whenever he felt like it because hardly anyone shows up to that store anyway – “Ham Panther is literally right across the street,” he argued, “And they just sell the same shit, and more shit, for cheaper! Anyone who wants good food would have a better time at like, any other store that actually exists.” – but the final straw may or may not have been him and Eric smashing their old lights in the carpark at the back of the store when he was supposed to be closing.

“Jesus Christ, San,” you wheeze, “I’m honestly surprised it took them this long. Wait, but, wasn’t the reason they hadn’t fired you yet was because you were like, the only other employee they had?”

Sunwoo had given you a long, hard look before removing himself from you and letting San come in and go on about his story, which spoke all the words it needed to say. ‘We’ll come back to this later.’ You’re not sure you want to, but you’re happy indulge in San’s shenanigans for the time being and catch your breath again, even if it’s a struggle to shake off the heaviness of everything all at once so suddenly.

“Yeah, well, I was, but then this new guy joined, I think his name is Jeongin or something? I dunno, but it probably doesn’t matter since if he can take my shifts I’m probably done for. I’m at least gonna see a cut in my shifts, but also, I think the night shift guy is leaving, so there might be hope for me yet.”

“But not for your sleep schedule,” you joke, and San nods solemnly.

“Yup, no hope for that one. But anyway! Either way I was like, this probably won’t bode over well, and I’m hot as fuck so I might as well give a shot at being a camboy on the side? Like, seems easier than being a stripper, since I don’t have to learn how to dance or work a pole, and we have enough sex that I probably wouldn’t need to change much of my routine as much as just like, chucking on a camera every now and then. I could make sure your faces aren’t included in the shot, or I could just go solo. Helps to have an apartment to myself.”

“Keep flexing that on us, why don’t you?” Sunwoo huffs, rolling his eyes. He’s quieter than usual, but not enough for it to look like anything more than just being tired, but he’s no less sassy. “I’m less shocked you still have a job and more shocked that you can still pay for an apartment on your own.”

“Well, it helps that I don’t spend much on food,” San reasons, “Considering Wooyoung cooks enough to feed a small country and gets offended when we don’t eat it, and the rest of you guys don’t mind me raiding the fridge every other night or so.”

You snort. “Who said we don’t mind? You know the rule, if there’s only one left it’s not yours – take the last slice of pizza again and I will fucking end you, Choi San.”

He guiltily covers his hand with his mouth. “Oops! Enough of that though, so long story short I heard this site was pretty safe and pays well so I take a look to see what my competition would be like, and lo and behold… the one and only Stray Kids’ Hwang Hyunjin’s cock, balls and ass, first thing on my laptop screen. Viola!”

Placing himself on the couch next to you two with his laptop on his knees for you to see, he clicks play. You only recognise the man after your thorough Instagram stalking from earlier, but it’s definitely him – he doesn’t cover his face at all, the side of it pressed to the mattress with his ass up in the air, stuffed with a pink toy, hands tied behind his back and hard, leaking cock on full display for the camera, trapped in a cock ring that keeps vibrating around him. You wonder how he’s planning to untie himself after he finishes – or how he tied his own wrists behind his back anyway, and if he did that on camera or before turning it on, because there doesn’t seem to be anyone else with him. He must’ve been live for a while now because he looks on the brink of tears as the buzzing stops, brokenly whining and writhing on the bed.

“Please,” he whimpers, shamelessly shoving his hips down on the mattress where he’s stained it with his pre-cum already in an attempt to get any kind of stimulation while bound, “Please let me come. I’ve been so good for you guys, please, I was so, so close…!”

You can’t deny that the visual – hell, the audio too – is hot. Anyone with eyes, ears and a sexual attraction to men would agree on that much. While you thought you’d probably end up zoning out and overthinking your interactions with your bandmates the whole time, you find yourself instead transfixed with the performer on the screen and his alternative form of performance. Does his band know about this, you wonder? If not, it could be quite the juicy secret to leverage later. Regardless, heat simmers beneath your skin with every one of Hyunjin’s whiny pleas.

The chat is moving so fast you almost can’t keep up with it. But you do notice the sudden influx of donations, and suddenly the buzzing resumes again and Hyunjin’s whole body jolts as he squirms to get back on his knees so the camera can see his dick again. He doesn’t seem like he’s acting or playing much up, eyes glazed over and breathing heavy in between his honey-sweet moans. He’s so unfathomably pretty that even fucked out like this, he looks picturesque.

“Don’t come…? Guys please, please just let me come, haah, I’ll- I’ll put on such a pretty show for you I p-promise!”

San shamelessly adjusts the raging hard-on in his pants as you watch, hand hovering over the tracking pad. “So he’s managed to hook up both a cock ring and a vibrator to the site’s donations, but there’s options both to make it vibrate but also to make it stop, which I’ve never really seen before. It’s like a bidding war between the ones who want to edge him and the ones who want to make him come, which might be hell for him but holy hell is he raking in mad cash that way.”

“That’s actually so smart,” you hum thoughtfully, “Leveraging control freaks’ need for control to make even more money. Guess the orgasm denial enthusiasts are winning tonight, huh?”

“Do you think this is how they afforded all that fancy shit for their stage? Look, that guy just donated a hundred bucks to edge him again. If I can make this much money off camming, I can quit Snack Falcon for good and get like a day’s worth of pay in an hour or two!”

Sunwoo isn’t even paying attention to what he’s saying, fixated on the view on the screen and the sounds of Hyunjin’s whimpering filtering from the speakers. He slips a hand down the waistband of his pants and boxers to stroke himself languidly, wetting his lips. “He’s fucking hot.”

Jerking off to porn together isn’t exactly the most common activity between the renegades, but it’s not unheard of, either, if one of you happen to stumble across something hot enough to be worth sharing. It’s just that most of the time, with so many options readily available, you don’t really need to look for porn when the group chat’s attachments are full of it, and you could create an equally hot or even hotter scenario yourselves.

It’s still normal enough that you all just fall into it naturally without talking about it, San also tugging his cock free to jerk it a lot hastier than Sunwoo, obviously riled up from the moment he entered the apartment, shamelessly letting his head fall back and a groan filter from his lips at the sight. “He’s so fucking hot it’s unfair.”

Unfair to who? You think San is arguably just as breathtaking, but it doesn’t seem like the right time to voice that thought, especially after everything that just happened, so you keep that part to yourself and simply take in the sight of him, jaw clenched and almost fucking into his fist before turning back to the screen.

“Yeah, no kidding. Perfect face, perfect body, I can’t really say I’m surprised people are paying hundreds just to have their way with him,” you mutter in awe, working your fly undone because that visual is enough to make you throb but the sounds just make it maddening. Is that how desperate he usually sounds, or is that just him on camera? You’re itching to find out, already having decided on your next target for your borderline malicious flirting.

To your surprise, Sunwoo slaps your hands away with his free one before you can slip them down your underwear, but before you can protest or ask why he replaces it with his own, quick to rub at your enlarged clit without any of his usual teasing. You’re not sure if he just feels like it, or if it has anything to do with the conversation you were having before San interrupted, but if that is the case you’re not exactly sure what the message he’s trying to give is supposed to be. You don’t oppose to it though, happy to reach over and grab his dick instead, but he doesn’t let you do that either, clearly insistent on you not doing any of the work and him getting both of you off. You’re almost shocked that San doesn’t complain at being left out, but he’s not even looking at you two, just at Hyunjin’s trembling form on his laptop.

“O-Oh fuck, my love– my loves, I’m close, please, please let me come, d-don’t you think I deserve it? Ha-ah… please…!”

He desperately glances somewhere beyond the camera, and that answers your question from earlier; someone lucky is in the room with him – you wonder who, whether it’s a partner, a bandmate, or some else, but the thought doesn’t occupy you for long as much as the thought of him liking an audience even without a camera – watching as Hyunjin’s mouth falls open in a silent plea; please. He must be truly at his limit if he’s asking someone to interfere with his viewer’s wishes just for the sake of his orgasm, but the beautiful distress on his face tells you that whoever is on the other side of the camera isn’t budging. You like seeing him a mess like this, rather than the pretty and powerful man you saw on stage and talking to Felix at the Prism, and knowing that he’s your competition has you hoping they prolong his suffering just a bit longer; the thought of seeing him break and cry along with the feeling of Sunwoo’s skilled fingers between your legs has you almost dizzy.

“San, make him turn it off.”

“Wait, what?” San finally looks at you, hands balled into fists by your side as Sunwoo continues working his magic. “Like, turn off the stream or–“

“No, donate like twenty bucks to turn it off, I’ll pay you back later– I just hope no one pays higher to keep it on…”

“You’re cruel,” San scoffs, but he’s grinning just as sadistically as you as he sets up the donation to turn off the cock ring and the vibrator at the same time, and to your luck, as soon as the donation goes through, Hyunjin’s body goes limp as both toys immediately turn off.

“No, no, no, please let me come!” Hyunjin borderline screams, voice cracking under the strain as tears stain his pretty cheeks. His hips twitch in search of the stimulation he just lost, but within seconds he’s spurting cum all over his stomach and the sheets beneath him completely untouched, gasping and thrashing around on the bed. “No, fuck, no, please…”

He sobs into the sheets, the muscles in his arms bulging with effort to free himself from his restraints, but the moment passes and his dick is still achingly hard and an angry red from his ruined orgasm. His ruined orgasm after being edged for possibly hours by strangers, the orgasm that you decided to ruin just to see him squirm.

The rush of power hits you all at once, and with the addition of Sunwoo rubbing at your clit with vigour, you follow after Hyunjin, hips bucking up into Sunwoo’s warm hand as your high rolls through you in waves. You don’t make much noise beyond a brief groan, wanting to hear Hyunjin continue to plead, higher-pitched this time as the toys turn on again to overstimulate him after having his orgasm ruined. He’s an absolute wreck, covered in sweat, tears and cum, hair sticking to his face and framing his head on the mattress like a crown, and you find yourself coming harder than you usually would just from rubbing one out with someone’s fingers.

Sunwoo smirks, retracting his hand and licking them clean, moaning at the taste as he finishes in his own fist, grunting lowly at the feeling. Wanting to repay his generosity, you lean over and take his dick in your mouth, sucking it clean and making him twitch wildly at the oversensitivity, but you move to suck his fingers clean instead before it becomes too much, and he strokes your hair affectionately with his free hand as a silent thank you.

San is a lot louder as he gets closer, moaning and biting his lip, face scrunched up in pleasure. “Me next, please, I’m so close, just–“ He gently holds the back of your head, and you allow him to lead you to his cock and take the tip in your mouth, wrapping your hand around the base while you suck. “Fuck! Yes, just like that, thank you, fuck, I’m gonna come– can you– can I–“

You hum in confirmation, swirling your tongue around him and making sure to drag the ball of your piercing along the underside of the sensitive head just the way he likes it, and he comes within seconds, emptying his load on your tongue. As hot as the action is, it doesn’t taste great, probably due to the amount of americanos he’s been drinking as of late – so, feeling a little cheeky, you lean up to kiss him in his post-orgasm glow, and make sure to shove your tongue in his mouth and give you a taste of himself.

“Mmh–!” He makes a cutely disgruntled noise as you, for all practical purposes, spit his cum back in his mouth, but he doesn’t push you off him right away. When he does, he clicks his tongue a few times with a scrunched nose, tasting himself, then sticks his tongue out. “Okay, loud and clear, you don’t have to say it.”

You snicker at that, happy with your petty revenge and his endearingly peeved expression. “Less coming in my mouth till you lessen your coffee intake, ya nasty.”

San chuckles, covering his face with his arm in mild embarrassment. Only mild – it would probably be far more embarrassing with a partner or a hook-up, but the runaways unique closeness shines through once more as it doesn’t seem to bother him or ruin the moment. There wasn’t much of a moment to ruin, really – it was simply a casual release between friends. Bandmates. Whatever. It was casual, is the point, and comfortable enough to pick on each other like this and for him to dismiss it. “Yeah, yeah. Maybe I’ll invest in some pineapple juice or something.”

Sunwoo simply snorts at the exchange, tucking himself back into his pants and getting up. “Alright, I’m gonna go get us dinner, San are you staying?”

He beams, dimples on full display, charming as can be. “If you would be so kind, yes please.”

The other man simply rolls his eyes as he grabs his keys and goes to slip his shoes on. “I’m only so generous to you because you effectively pay for all our snacks by not looking while on duty.” He turns to you just as he’s about to head out the door. “Give some thought to what we were talking about earlier.”

San glances at you in confusion at you at that, but you don’t pay him any mind. “I think I wanna hear your answer first, mister.”

Sunwoo quirks a brow, the slightest of smirks pulling at his plush lips. That damn infuriating smirk that you usually love but is now driving you an entirely foreign kind of crazy that you are not equipped to deal with.

“Hm. I think that in itself tells me yours.”

He doesn’t give you a chance to elaborate or respond, stepping out into the hallway and shutting the door behind him, leaving you feeling as exposed as Hyunjin was on the screen moments earlier. Of course he has to get the last word in, that ass – but the implications of it haunt you all the way to your bed that night, staring at the ceiling, while Sunwoo sleeps with an arm around you like nothing – or maybe everything? – ever happened.

[inevitably-johnlocked]

hello i love your blog!

i was wondering if you had any any bamf sherlock fics?

Anonymous asked: hello do you have a list of bamf sherlock fics?

Hey Nonnies!

Ah, not many, but I think you will enjoy these! I also added some MFL’s tagged as such so I can have a longer list, LOL. 

I know I’ve missed a bunch, so please add more, friends! :)

BAMF SHERLOCK

See also:

Protective Johnlock

Protective Sherlock

BAMF! But Insecure John

BAMF and/or Soldier John (July 2020)

White Blank Page by SarahCat1717 (M, 11,936 w, 7 Ch. || Post-TRF, Clever John, Reunion Fic, Pining Sherlock, Letters, Fantasies) – Post-fall, Sherlock is off eliminating Moriarty's crime web. He finds he misses John. He can't divulge that he still lives, but he placates his need to communicate with John and still feel a connection with him by sending him blank letters. But over time, this writing exercise lends itself to Sherlock exploring his feelings for his friend. What will happen when Sherlock returns to London and the man he has been "writing" to regularly for the past two years? NOT S3 compliant. Mary who? 

Domestic Matters by ohlooktheresabee (M, 29,404 w., 6 Ch. || Fantasy AU || First Meetings, Developing Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Domestic Fluff, BAMF Sherlock, BAMF John, Idiots in Love, Misunderstandings, Supernatural, Elements, Implied / Referenced Child Abuse) – All flatmates need to work out domestic matters between them - who does the dishes, who takes out the rubbish, how often does the carpet need to be vacuumed - these are part and parcel of sharing a living space together. However, when you’re an elf and your flatmate is going to be a human you just met, this rather complicates things…Very loosely inspired by 'The Elves and The Shoemaker' by The Brothers Grimm.

Sunday Evening 6 p.m. by Silvergirl (E, 30,712 w., 6 Ch. || Post-TRF / TEH Divergence, Grief / Mourning / Stages of Grief, Mutual Pining, Dreams, Reunion, Love Confessions, First Kiss / Time, Alternating First Person POV, Smart John, BAMF Boys, Emotional Love Making, Song Fic, Referenced Suicide, First Kiss / Time, Touching, Sleepy Sherlock, Blow Job, Villain Mary) – Six months after Sherlock jumped, he learns that John is dedicating songs to him on a requests-only radio programme. Is John just working through grief? Or is he—communicating? Fixes the hell out of S3 by pre-empting it altogether. Remember, as TAB told us, John is Pretty Damn Smart.

The Real Great Perfumers by shelleysprometheus (E, 45,355 w., 68 Ch. || Case Fic, Alternating POV, Gay Sherlock / Bi John, Canon Compliant with Divergence at TRF, Friends to Lovers, Oral / Anal, Pining, First Kiss / Time, Dev. Rel., Drugging, Body Worship, Bathing, Love Confessions, Travelling, Bottomlock, Cranky Sherlock, BJ’s, Alternating POV, Jealous John) – The case, this case. This extraordinary, fascinating, scintillating case. A house. Designed entirely by its eccentric owner, built by no less than five hundred expert tradesmen in the heart of Marrakesh. A house that had, seemingly not only driven its owner out, but also to his quite unpleasant death. And a perfumer, a chemist no less, the very thought of the secrets that house could reveal, would reveal was irresistible. Sherlock had to have this case ... and it seems, he also had to have John! Part 1 of the Forethought and Fire series

Perdition's Flames by i_ship_an_armada (E, 63,435 w., 21 Ch. || Treklock AU, Est. Rel, Genetic Engineering, Angst & Fluff, BAMF!John) – Sherlock would do anything to save him. Risk anything. Give anything. His money, his life. His soul. What he does, though, is change both of their destinies forever. Genetic re-engineering is the only option left. It turns out researchers underestimated the life expectancy and potential abilities of genetically re-engineered subjects. The British government and what would eventually become the United Federation of Planets, however, had not. Part 1 of PF Universe

The Vapor Variant by 88thParallel (CanadaHolm) (M, 72,684 w., 18 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Post-THoB, John Whump, Protective Sherlock, Guilty Sherlock, Anxious/Worried Sherlock, Virgin Sherlock, Angst with Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, PTSD John, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, Suspense, Virus, Sick Fic, Big Brother Mycroft) – They stood face to face in the middle of a clearing. The dim light of the moon barely allowed Sherlock to see the glassy terror in John’s eyes and the sweat that glistened off his forehead. His nose was bleeding again, blood dripping in a slow stream from his right nostril. They were both gasping for air, John’s eyes locked on Sherlock’s. There was no recognition there, just wild animal fear. Time stood still for an eternal few seconds, and Sherlock took a shaky breath. “John—”Spell broken, John spun and bolted back into the woods. Still heaving for air, Sherlock took off after him. 

Secrets and Revelations by Hisstah (E, 83,535 w., 9 Ch. || Sentinel / Guides Omegaverse AU || Adventure, Violence, Anal / Oral, Omega!John / Alpha!Sherlock, Case Fic, Politics, Mild DubCon) – Dr John Watson has some major secrets that he's kept from his flatmate, Alpha Sentinel Sherlock Holmes. Now the Sentinel Tower is after him. Can John stay out of their hands until he can reveal his secrets to Sherlock? Part 1 of Secrets and Revelations

A Further Sea by i_ship_an_armada & ShinySherlock (E, 125,492 w., 23 Ch. || Historical Pirates AU || Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Doctor John / Pirate Captain Sherlock, Sailing, UST / RST, Masturbation, Action / Adventure, Mild Angst & Peril, Romance, Shaving, Molly/Janine, Bottomlock, Hand / Blow Jobs, Past Drug Use, Slow Burn, Mild Violence, Facial Shaving, Happy Ending) – Here be a tale of adventure for both body and soul, but beware if ye be not of stout heart, for this be piratelock, ya savvy? Luckless ship's surgeon John Watson takes a chance, and finds himself eye to eye with The Ghost, the scourge of the seven seas and a definite thorn in the side of the blaggard, James Moriarty. But when John finds there's more to this most cunning pirate than be meetin' the eye, he has to choose... is it a pirate's life for him?

Against the Rest of the World by SilentAuror (E, 151,714 w., 20 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Post-TRF, Hiatus Fic, POV First Person Sherlock, Present Tense, First Kiss/Time, Big Brother Mycroft, Escaping from Capture, Soft Sherlock, Toplock, Insecurity, Infidelity, Travelling, Introspection, Pining Sherlock, Depression, Fantasies, Yearning for the Past, PTSD Sherlock, Suicidal Ideation) – Sherlock has been away from London for nine hundred and twelve days and counting, and has no idea what sort of reception to expect when he finally returns. 

A Fold in the Universe by darkest_bird (E, 152,869 w., 26 Ch. || Omegaverse / Prime Universe Crossover || OmegaJohn / AlphaSherlock, First Kiss / Time, Friends to Lovers, Established Relationship, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Dubious Consent, Humour) – Alpha Sherlock and Omega John are in a relationship. Prime Sherlock and Prime John are not. So what happens when a freak fold in the universe switches one John for the other?

MARKED FOR LATER

Running Obliquely by Raina_at (M, 4,288 w., 1 Ch. || Post-TRF / Hiatus, POV Sherlock, BAMF Sherlock, BAMF John, Friends to Lovers, Idiots in Love) – Sherlock just wanted John to know that he isn't dead. It doesn't go as he expected. That's mostly a good thing.

The Last Case of Dr. John Watson by Susan (E, 14,468 w., 1 Ch. || Post-TBB / Pre-TGG, Poisoning, Hurt/Comfort, Illness, BAMF Sherlock, Case Fic) – If he really had less than twenty-four hours to live, was it too much to ask that it be sunny? Being poisoned and soaked to the skin on the same day seemed to John a bit of cosmic overkill. Sherlock's only hope of saving John is finding the antidote before it's too late. But where does he start?

Until the End of my Days by chervilspotatoes (M, 20,272 w., 20 Ch. || Merlin Crossover / Medieval Magical AU || Sorcerer Sherlock, Prince John, Pining Sherlock, Developing Relationship, Teenlock, Servant Sherlock, BAMF Sherlock, BAMF John, Heroic Sherlock, Misunderstandings, Alternating POV, Protective Greg, Love Confessions, Soul Bond / Mates, Happy Ending) – Sherlock learns to embrace his destiny as Prince John's protector, but soon realizes he is in love with the unavailable prince. However, this knowledge does not stop him from staying by John's side as John becomes king and faces unforeseen circumstances.

Octopus by ohlooktheresabee (T, 20,778 w., 3 Ch. || Fluff, Light Angst, Fluff and Angst, Developing Relationship, Asexual Sherlock, BAMF Sherlock, Hurrt/Comfort, Feels, Romantic Fluff, Canon-Typical Violence, Injuries, Happy Ending) – Sherlock is starting to get used to the idea of being in a romantic relationship with John; slowly becoming more and more comfortable - that is until he overhears John say something that makes him question it all... Meanwhile, the boss of a foreign crime syndicate is not exactly thrilled to find out that Sherlock Holmes and John Watson have foiled his latest scheme - but with Sherlock suitably distracted, he wonders if he might just be able to pull of his plans after all...

Other Side of The Moon by love_in_mind_palace (T, 23,446 w., 7 Ch. || Post-TRF, BAMF John, BAMF Sherlock, Mutual Pining, Suicidal Thoughts, Angst with Happy Ending) – After the fall Sherlock goes away to dismantle Moriarty’s network while living through different identities and hiding. But then something unexpected starts to happen. After a while of everything going according to plan, he’s suddenly just too late everywhere. Because someone was there before him, and took care of everything. It takes him a while. But then he realises. It’s John. Avenging his death.

The Man in the Crimson Cloak by Aelaer (T, 25,968 w., 6 Ch. || Dr. Strange Crossover || Post-S1 / Post Avengers Endgame, No Johnlock, Action / Adventure, POV Sherlock, Dimension Travel, BAMF Strange, BAMF Sherlock, Bratty Sherlock) – Sherlock’s terribly ordinary and outright dull day turns into something well beyond his wildest dreams when a most interesting stranger enters his flat. Part 3 of the Adventures Throughout the Multiverse series

4 Weddings and a Funeral: A Johnlock rom-com AU by MorganeUK (T, 28,983 w., 11 Ch. || Four Weddings & A Funeral AU || Alternate First Meetings, Mike Stamford’s Wedding, Matchmaker Mike, Friendship, One Night Stands, Weddings, BAMF Sherlock, Dream Sex, Pining, Mystrade, Happy Endings) – What happens when you have found a Mr Right who doesn't do commitment? Hope to meet him again and again until he changes his mind, of course! A John & Sherlock AU (loosely) based on the famous British comedy: 4 Weddings and a Funeral. Part 2 of the Rom-com adaptations...

Signs of Life by LiviKate (M, 39,160 w., 17 Ch. || BAMF John/Sherlock, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Caught in the Act/Voyeurism, Jealous John, Fluff and Angst, Cuddles, Hurt/Comfort) – The Yarders have a pretty well developed view of Sherlock Holmes. Cold, cruel, dispassionate and robotic. He simply doesn't register as human. As Sherlock and John fall farther and farther in love with one another, however, the proud men and women from NSY find themselves facing irrefutable evidence as to the true existence of a heart in Sherlock Holmes. These are a couple random drabbles in which the Yarders see some pretty damning signs of life.

Stolen by All_I_need (M, 39,415 w., 14 Ch. ||  Post T6T, Pining Sherlock, Angst, Child Abduction, BAMF Sherlock, Clueless John, Case Fic, Broken Friendships, Rosie) – "He'd rather have anyone but you." - These words, and a letter, is all Sherlock got from John after Mary's death. Devastated and heartbroken, he leaves London behind ... until a case drags him back. And this time, it's personal. To save his goddaughter, Sherlock will have to confront his demons - and the man he left behind.

Consulting for Christmas by ohlooktheresabee (G, 40,153 w., 6 Ch. || Far Future Post S4 / Older Rosie, Thriller, Case Fic, Pre-Relationship, Christmas, Paris, POV Alternating, Fluff, Light Angst, Mutual Pining, BAMF John, BAMF Sherlock, Friends to Lovers, Idiots in Love, Jealousy, Misunderstandings, Mistletoe, Ice Skating, Heist, Awkward Romance, Developing Relationship, For a Case, Background Mystrade, Angst with Happy Ending) – The Louvre Museum in Paris is planning to host the celebrated Winter Fabergé Egg for its winter exhibition - quite the feat as it has not been on public display since 2002. However there is a snag: whispers of a world-renowned master-thief with his eyes set on the valuable prize. The curator has asked the famous Sherlock Holmes to consult on security, but the detective needs a lot of convincing: he is after all a bit busy with trying to woo a certain clueless ex-army doctor… At the same time, John is attempting to balance work, missing Rosie who is off on her gap year, a volunteer gig at a local London orphanage, and seething jealousy upon the arrival of an apparent old friend of Sherlock’s. Attempting to foil the heist of the century while remaining friendly and objective might just be a step too far... A Christmas crime caper packed full of misdirection, miscommunication and mistletoe, set against the romantic backdrop of London and Paris in the winter. Thrown into all this, will our two idiots finally manage to see what has been right in front of them all along?

The Other One by PurpleHydrangeas (G, 80,612 w, 6 Ch. || Female Sherlock AU || Male John, Spy John, Pre-Relationship, BAMF Sherlock, Meddling Mycroft) – Sherlock Holmes isn't anybody's fool. In fact, she's regularly six steps ahead of Mycroft. That is, until his meddling knocks her through a loop, and before she knows it, she's adding a wing to her Mind Palace to house a not-so-aged Army Doctor. John Watson doesn't know what to make of this mad genius with blue eyes, but he knows working for Mycroft Holmes is, within the span of 24 hours, the biggest mistake of his life. Part 4 of Johnlock Fills

I want to go home. Series by IwillbeReichenbach (E, 82,514+ w. across 3 works || Series WiP || TEH / Post-Serbia, Canon Compliant, Graphic Depictions of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Sherlock-centric, Torture, Violence, BAMF Sherlock, Sherlock Whump, Canon Compliant, Mycroft To The Rescue, Dark, Pain/Hurt, Injury, Waterboarding, Electricity Misuse, Rape Aftermath/Recovery, Humiliation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Physical Abuse, Broken Sherlock) – A version of the events that occur in Serbia and shortly thereafter. Sherlock is in for a rough time. I have tried my best to keep it canon compliant. 

The Killing Principle by Vulpesmellifera (E, 90,151 w.+, 40/44 Ch. || WiP || American AU || Gay John, Serial Killer Mary, Bum Appreciation, Sherlock is William, Dating Difficulties, BAMF Sherlock, Slow Burn, Thriller, Confessions, Whump, Angst with Happy Ending, Minor Character Death) – John Watson served twice in AmeriCorps, married his high school sweetheart, and then entered med school. A sudden arrest and accusation of multiple murders ends his promising career, irrevocably altering his life's trajectory. Acquitted of his wife’s crimes, John spends the next ten years as the maligned ex-husband of convicted serial killer Mercy Mary. A job offer draws him out of hiding and back to Connecticut - the very state where the crimes were committed. He needs the money, and the job is a dream. Then he meets the brilliant William Vernet, and it seems like he has a second chance at life and love. But the past has a way of catching up.

Mutual Attraction by meet_me_in_samarra (M, 93,899 w., 20 Ch. || Different First Meeting || Pre-BBC Canon, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, Idiots in Love, BAMF! Boys, Injured Sherlock, Drug Addict Sherlock, Sherlock’s Past, Drug Use, Prostitution, Suicidal Ideation, Sherlock-centric) – The day when a homeless drug addict and a suicidal ex-soldier met was the beginning of something until then unheard-of: Mutual Attraction. Of course, not all was what it looked like in the first place but the days of boredom, loneliness and lack of purpose were history. A case had to be solved, lives had to be saved and a developing relationship had to be tackled.

Riptide Lover by jinglebell (E, 114,090 w., 20 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Merfolk & Victorian AU || Mermaid Sherlock, Human John, BAMF John/Sherlock, Possessive Sherlock, Oral Sex, Hand Jobs, Mild Gore, Dubious Interspecies Consent, Stockholm Syndrome, Dark Romance, Dubcon and Morality, Rough Sex, Abstract Mentions of Rape, Size Queen, Switchlock, Foot Fetish) – The year is 1866. When John becomes swept overboard, he never expects to encounter a living creature of myth. When the merman absconds with John, the lost sailor must use every tool at his disposal to convince Sherlock not to kill him. But it seems that killing John Watson is not what the deadly, beautiful creature has in mind at all...

Did you feel it? by MorganeUK (G, 126,752 w., 58 Ch. || Soulmates AU || Growing Up, Angst and Feels, Protective Greg, Whump, Mutual Pining, BAMF Sherlock/John, Protective John, Implied/Referenced Torture, Loosely Follows Series) – In a world where 0.01% of the population have a soulmate with whom they share pains and violent emotions... what are the odds that an ex-army doctor and an ex-addict detective open their heart and soul enough to found each others?

Scheherezade by sgam76 (G, 197,576 w., 45 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Post-TRF/Pre-TSo3, PTSD Sherlock, Implied/Referenced Torture, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Humour, Protective John, Papa Lestrade, Big Brother Mycroft, BAMF John, BAMF Sherlock, Aftermath of Serbia, Past Child Abuse, Childhood Memories, Drunk Sherlock, Canon Compliant, Suicidal Thoughts / Attempt) – Sherlock is home, he and John are returning to cases, and all's right with the world--right? But a series of minor mishaps and injuries makes two things very clear to his friends and family: first, Sherlock's time away wasn't the grand adventure everyone has assumed it was; and second, that time has left Sherlock with a legacy that's bleeding into his life today. Sherlock is Not Okay, and it's not going away. Part 1 of the Scheherezade 'verse series 

[woogurl]

(hi, it’s me again pretending as if i didn’t go on an unannounced hiatus).

yes, i’m back...for now. i’m not sure for how long. as i’m too busy these days, but i wanted to specifically make this post because it’s been bothering me for a while now. someone mentioned this in the woosan tag as well, but it’s...

non-atiny’s(and some anti-shipping atiny) who constantly feel the need to expose woosan as some cleverly put together ship that was carefully manufactured by the company. i’ve seen so many titles on youtube and posts on twitter saying how:

“woosan is obvious fanservice” and “woosan; a prime example of queerbating in kpop” 

i’ve never seen a ship be so criticized for being ‘out there’ and ‘in your face’. i’ve made a post on fanservice before but this post will mainly be focused on why i think it’s completely unfair, dishonest, homophobic, and antagonistic to view their relationship as manufactured and fake. and before you go, ‘i’m sure they’re good friends but all that other stuff is clearly done by the company.’ and don’t get me wrong, bc kq is very much aware of the ships and do try to profit off of fanservice...like every other company. but the clearest indicator of this not being MOSTLY all fanservice is something i’ve mentioned many times before.

1. the rest of the ships in ateez not being anywhere near the intimacy and skinship as woosan.

2. body language. 

3. the members THEMSELVES explaining their dynamics.

4. kq not FORCING ships.

ever since predebut and debut there’s ALWAYS been three main ships in ateez. seongjoong, yungi, and ofc woosan. 

as you could see, woosan was definitely thee most popular ship. however, i do believe their popularity grew over time because during the early era i’m sure seongjoong dominated, even on fanfic sites they dominate the amount of fanfics written about them. however, woosan’s clear comfort and intimacy with each other made them more popular among atiny’s and even non atiny’s they even had some taekookers saying their ship was realer and that’s saying something xD. 

something people really, no i mean REALLY need to understand is...doing fanservice does not invalidate an entire relationship. 

there are plenty of celeb couples who enjoy publicly dating and showing affection. 

then comes the argument of well, “if they were real they wouldn’t be so obvious about it.”

this statement bothers me because, people who believe that showing too much skinship is fanservice but then they’ll turn around and say at the same time it’s just culture???

it’s fair to see them doing their fake love dance routine and going THAT’S FANSERVICE. but looking at those moments and going ‘nah, their entire friendship gotta be fanservice.’ is delusional to me, as u like to call us shippers. 

even if you do not ship them romantically, it’s odd to me that people see two same-sex idols expressing comfortability, intimacy and skinship together and feel like if they’re too open about it or if it looks too gay then it’s....fake? even tho fans love to say it’s just apart of their culture. but if it gets too gay, then it’s fanservice. 

i can’t. xD

just because they’re completely comfortable with being intimate doesn’t mean they’re being forced to act that way...it literally just means they ARE that way. 

i constantly put emphasis on being comfortable with skinship and intimacy bc, to me that’s just not something the company can force. body language is a reaction from your true emotions and your inner most thoughts. IT IS THE FOUNDATION TO FIGURING OUT WHAT A PERSON TRULY FEELS INSIDE AS THEIR EMOTIONS WILL ALWAYS TRANSLATE THROUGH THEIR BODY. if u are uncomfortable it will be revealed through body language. and i know a ton of seongjoong shippers are gonna hate me for this, but they are a prime example of this. trust me i’m not here to start a ship war, i am purely just using them as an example of discomfort in body language. 

body language is something a company cannot control.

seongjoong show definite signs of being uncomfortable with intimacy, heck shippers use that one moment seonghwa expressed sadness bc hj hugged the other members and not him as a shipping moment lol. but even when they do hug it looks uncomfortable. my guess is bc hj is not good at expressing his feelings and isn’t a touchy person. and even tho seonghwa is comfortable with skinship, it’s understandable that it can become uncomfortable for him bc of the things i mentioned before as well as the power dynamics and age difference between them.

and here i am going to be stoned bc, i have more to say about seongjoong(don’t kill me). 

bc something the company also can’t control is what OR who the members hang out with OUTSIDE of group activities. so that’s why i’m also mentioning that i also don’t think seongjoong is as close as shippers think they are as...seonghwa mostly hangs out with woosan. and it is almost always mentioned how often woosan hang out together off camera. even early on. woosan hung out so much that it literally came to a point where yeosang felt like his bestfriend was taken from him. 

can we mention again how happy that makes san? and let’s not forget the moment woo said seonghwa was into him, but san was like. ‘you’re into me tho’ and they BOTH tried to gloss over that.

wooyoung: wHaT dO u mEaN? 

lol. people love to say how much san’s whipped for woo, but woo’s probably even more whipped. 

here’s more evidence of woosan enjoying each others company off camera. https://woogurl.tumblr.com/post/614348590729625600/nobody-wooyoung-san-and-i-bass-boosted#notes. 

we can even talk about a more recent moment. the ateez debate about mint chocolate. dunno what’s with these kpop idols debating about mint choco ‘cause bts did it too. lol. anyway, they ended up talking about the group dynamics. and how woosan again are always together. 

i-i’m sorry, but does moment remind y’all of a past moment? LMFAO. seonghwa’s feeling yeosang’s pain. 

seonghwa’s just like woosan says they’re tired of each other but can’t detach themselves. and here’s more evidence that the company isn’t forcing them. for those who thinks kq has some masterplan when it comes to promoting ships.

when they talk about their dynamics, jongho says he feels left out but hj exposes him and says, ‘we’ve tried to pair him with someone but he(jongho) just doesn’t do it’

so this just solidifies my statement from earlier, if the members don’t wanna promote a ship. they ain’t gonna do it. we got one or two vlives from twoho and das it. lmfao. don’t get me wrong. i’m sure jongho get along well with yunho as well as the other members, but promoting any of the other ships in ateez like woosan isn’t gonna work well. ‘cause the rest of the members don’t have the same dynamics. woosan are comfortable with skinship and being intimate with each other and the other members just are not.

another piece of evidence is the members tired reaction whenever woosan is mentioned. lmfao. 

this was so dramatic omg. but the members reactions are very telling of woosan’s relationship off screen. if woosan was just fanservice i do not believe the members would react the way they do, maybe share some knowing glances at each other like. ‘pfft, they think woosan’s real’ but their reactions are always big or very indicative of something bigger happening behind the scenes. lol. 

i’m not gonna go into too much details, bc the members reactions to woosan are an entirely different post(i got so many posts to make. xD).

Lastly Wooyoung’s Tatto. I know right? He’s very committed to fanservice guys. 

Amicus ad Aras is something that woosan made to signify their friendship, and the fact woo got a tattoo on his body of it means a lot. not to mention woo himself taking initiative to find something that represented their relationship. 

i feel like i need to reiterate that the meaning of this tattoo was to define his relationship to san specifically so it applies to san specifically. woo has many MANY friends AS WELL as bestfriends yet he got a tattoo that can only be truly applied to san and no one else. 

u can continue saying theyy’re just good friends doing fanservice, but it’s obv that woo has many good friends. so the next question u gotta answer is what separates san from the others.

[bibbawrites]

Touch Me, Love Me - Alex Mercer x Willie SMUT (18+)

Request: yes, there were too many to copy and paste so here are main highlights from ones that werent just “willex smut” -  Alex finally getting the courage to talk to Wille about wanting him to be more rough and then of course the smutty rough part. /  it’s their first time together but they have both had sex before /  Alex is the bottom and Willie the top / can they be vocal I can just imagine Willie be very loud / why is alex always the top i wanna see some whiny bottom alex 

Word Count: 1406 words

Summary: Alex finally works up the nerve to admit something to Willie and Willie is more than happy to oblige 

Warnings: gay sex, unprotected sex, light swearing, rough sex, reference to past luke x alex 

A/N: you guys really wanted this so the anxiety of not wanting to let you all down is so real rn, so i’m just gonna post this before i start to hate it any more lol enjoy hopefully 

Tag List: @happinessinthedarkesttimes @molinaroberts​ @joynersgoatblog​ @courageous-she​ @littlemissaddict​ @gloomybrieyxb​ @itsyagorlemmalyn @jatpxmultifan​ @moneybagmgk​ @emeliii1​ @mybradforddream​ (the strike through means it wont let me tag you)

Alex was pacing when Willie poofed into the studio for their weekly movie night, where Willie had been catching Alex up on everything gay that had happened in cinema since his death. But by the look on Alex’s face, they wouldn’t be doing much movie watching that night. 

“Hotdog?” Willie called, drawing the blond’s attention to him. 

“I need to tell you something.” Alex blurted out. 

“Anything.” Willie assured him, perching on the arm of the couch and watching as Alex paced. 

“Luke and I dated. In the 90s. I never told you that.” Alex said after a moment. Willie nodded. 

“I figured. You guys radiate ‘we were boyfriends’ vibes.” He admitted. Alex froze, spinning to stare at Willie in disbelief. 

“Wait, you knew?” He questioned. Willie shrugged. 

“Not for certain. But I knew something had gone on at some point.” He answered, and Alex resumed his pacing.

“We didn’t date for long, less than a year.” Alex bit his lip. “But we stayed pretty... close afterwards.” 

“I’m not quite sure why this is relevant.” Willie frowned, and Alex too a deep breath. 

“I’m ready.” He said quickly. 

“For what?” Willie asked, confused. Alex bit his lip again. 

“To sleep with you.” He mumbled, and Willie’s eyes widened. 

“Oh, wow. That is not what I expected to hear.” Willie joked, his smile falling when he saw the frown on Alex’s face. 

“What else is bothering you?” He asked softly. 

“Wheneverlukeandiusedtohavesexitwasreallyroughandikindareallywantyoutofuckmeroughly.” Alex mumbled, so quick that Willie could barely understand a word that he had said. 

“Alex breathe.” He instructed, and Alex took a deep breath. “Now what on earth did you just say? Cause it sounded like another language.” 

Alex took another deep breath. 

“Whenever Luke and I used to have sex it was really rough and I kinda really want you to fuck me roughly.” Alex repeated, and Willie’s jaw dropped. Alex was full of surprises today. 

“You want me to fuck you? Roughly?” He repeated. Alex nodded. 

“Well yeah... You’ve met Luke, I bet you can imagine how he was in the bedroom.” He rambled. 

“Alex...” Willie trailed off and Alex froze, clearly sensing Willie’s hesitation. 

“Oh god, did I go too far? We can just forget this never happened.” He said quickly, and Willie shook his head. 

“No, Alex. You’re fine. It’s just... I’ve never topped anyone before.” He admitted. 

“It’s not that hard, really.” Alex replied, turning bright red at his admission. 

“If you say so Hotdog.” The nickname seemed to calm Alex, the blond finally settling down on the couch next to Willie. 

“Are we gonna do it here or do you have some secret hidden place for us to go?” He asked. 

Willie grinned. 

“I know just the place.” 

- 

“Is this where you live?” Alex questioned, looking around the hotel room that Willie had brought them to. It looked like any other hotel room that Alex had ever seen, except for one thing. Where the door would normally be was a blank wall, closing the room off to anyone who couldn’t poof through walls. Willie shrugged slightly.  

“Sometimes. Mostly I live at the club with the other dancers. But whenever I need to be alone I come here.” He said. Alex nodded. 

“How did you find it?” He asked and Willie grinned. 

“Honestly? I was skating down the hallway outside and my board caught on the carpet and I fell through the wall. Then I realised I was in a hotel room that for some reason had no door, so I just started coming here all the time. You’re the only person I’ve ever told about this place, let alone brought them here.” He admitted, sitting down on the edge of the large bed. 

“I’m honoured.” Alex sat down next to him and they both fell quiet. 

“Hey Lex?” Willie whispered, breaking the silence. Alex smiled softly at the nickname. 

“Yeah?” 

“I’m kinda nervous, about topping you.” Willie looked down at his fingers, his heart skipping a beat when Alex took his hands. 

“You’ll be okay. Plus you know we can always stop if we feel uncomfortable.” Alex assured him. 

“Okay.” Willie nodded. Alex grinned. 

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. So should I-” Alex cut him off by crashing their lips together and Willie gasped in shock, letting Alex take the lead for a few moments before he took control, pushing the taller boy backwards into the bed and climbed on top of him.

Willie’s fingers fiddled with the bottom of Alex's shirt, before pulling it off completely and kissing down his chest. He moved away to pull his own shirt off, kicking his shoes into the corner. 

Alex kicked his own shoes off, watching Willie intently.

"Take your pants off." Willie instructed.

"You’re sure no one will catch us here?” Alex questioned, but obeyed nonetheless. Willie nodded, already removing his own clothes to reveal his naked body, Alex blushing at the sight.

"I promise, I don’t even think anyone knows about it.” He reassured Alex, placing a gentle kiss on the blond’s lips. “We’re safe here.”

“Okay.” Alex stuttered as Willie’s hand made its way down Alex’s body and rested on the bulge in his underwear. Willie lent in, connecting their lips again as he massaged the bulge, leaving Alex a moaning mess.

"Can I take these off?" He asked, pulling away from Alex's lips. Alex nodded. Willie pulled Alex's underwear off quickly, throwing them aside.

"God you're so beautiful." Willie muttered, scanning Alex’s body, his mouth practically watering at the size of Alex’s cock. "Get up onto the bed."

Alex obliged. Willie sat in front of him.

"How do you want to do this?" He asked.

"It’s up to you. Tell me how you want me." Alex replied. Willie bit his lip, thinking.

"Okay. Lie down on your back and spread your legs." He said, and Alex did it. Willie ran a hand down Alex's thigh and Alex shuddered. Willie laughed slightly.

"I'm gonna put a finger in, okay? Loosen you up so it doesn't hurt as much." Alex nodded. Willie put a lube covered finger in, his other hand on Alex's hip, drawing gentle patterns. After a minute he added a second finger, and after giving Alex a second to adjust he began scissoring his fingers to stretch Alex out. The drummer moaned.

"You like that?" Willie asked, adding a third finger, and Alex could tell he was smiling.

"Feels so good." Alex replied. Willie removed his fingers, grabbing the lube once again to pour some on his dick.  

"If you think that was good wait ‘til we get to the next part." Willie jerked himself a few times, making sure he had enough lube, before moving closer to Alex, lifting the blond's hips slightly to make it easier, and then slowly entering the blond, both boys gasping at the pleasure.

"Tell me when to move." The skater instructed.

"Now." Alex whispered. Willie thrusted roughly, and Alex flinched slightly at the discomfort.

"Are you okay?" Willie asked, freezing slightly. He knew Alex had asked him to be rough, but he didn’t want to hurt the other boy.

"Yes." Alex replied, as the pain turned to pleasure. "It feels good now."

"Good." Willie said, thrusting again and beginning to set a fast pace, slamming into Alex. Alex moaned and reached down to grab his dick. Willie shoved his hand away, wrapping his own hand around Alex's cock, jerking it in time with his thrusts.

"Please Wills." Alex whined, his breath coming out in pants.

"Please what?" Willie questioned. Alex moaned loudly, his head falling back.  

"Harder." Willie complied and the room was filled with the sound of slapping skin, of loud moans and swearing.

“I’m so close.” Willie gasped, slamming into Alex with as much force as he could, and Alex screamed out in pleasure.

“Cum in me, please.” Alex begged. “Please Willie, please.”

Willie moaned loudly as he reached his climax, filling the younger boy with his cum, and Alex followed close behind, his own cum coating their chests.

After riding out their highs Willie pulled out, collapsing onto the bed next to Alex.

"How was that?" He whispered. Alex smiled shyly, snuggling into Willie.

"It was perfect. Thank you." Willie kissed him softly.

“Next time, you’re topping. I can’t wait to have your massive cock inside of me.” The skater grinned and Alex turned bright red, biting down on his lip.

“Well…” He whispered. “There’s always round two.”

[fatbottombucky]

It’s A Bro-Job!*Chris Evans x Reader*

Summary: Yourself and Chris crash at his place after his big 39th Birthday bash, you’re on the sofa when he confesses to something. You decide to help your “bro” out. 

Pairing: Chris Evans x Male!Reader

Rating: [+18] Explicit 

Warnings: MxM smut, Male oral receiving, anal. Creampie King! No plot, it’s all porn. I literally don’t know where this came from, I had a whole other idea but this... just happened

Word Count: Over 2K

Authors Note: I had a conversation with my friend Dan, how he got with his now boyfriend was because he gave him what he calls a “bro-job”. Don’t ask lol Again, my beta, Honey, REALLY helped a girl out with the smut @peachesnplum​ - Ro

Tagging: I was the anon lol @honeychicanawrites​ @rhyrhy462​ @softboi-vibes​

You both stumbled through the door, the lights were all off which made it impossible to see or walk without tripping up. You could hear Chris fumbling for the lightswitch, cursing under his breath when he slaps the wall haphazardly a few times. The lights flicker on and you blink at the brightness, trying to get your eyes to adjust to the sudden change of lighting. 

“Make yourself comfortable,” his words are slurred, but he’s not drunk just on the better side of tipsy. 

You both have that buzz. Your bodies are vibrating from the alcohol, plus the music from the venue you were at. The taste of the confetti cake in your mouths and sweat clings to your bodies; dancing, being pressed to so many people at the party. 

Chris always throws the best birthday bashes, that’s just facts. 

His 39th wasn’t an exception either, somehow, this was more wild. So, many people turned up. Women all wanting a dance with Chris, which he humbly accepted with a wicked grin thrown at you- he’s shameless. You’d never hear him brag about the advances, but he wouldn’t hide the absolute prideful smirk he gets when he is flirted with. 

It’s what makes the ending of this birthday so… different. Normally, you’d be his wingman. Granted you’ve never been with a woman before, you’re gay, but you somehow have this charming effect on everyone you meet and it helps ease Evans anxiety knowing if things get awkward you can steer him back on track. 

You originally met his brother, Scott, through Grindr. You met up, had a connection but more so as friends and you haven’t looked back. Five years of being their friend and pining after Chris. 

Tonight, however, Chris left the party with you. He danced and flirted with a few girls, pretty and stunning girls. But he claimed he didn’t find the person to give him that 39th sex experience. 

Whatever that means. 

However, the conversation happening now is something completely different. “Well, how would you know?” You asked with a laugh. “Guys suck dicks better, it’s facts. We know what we like, I’m sure girls are great. Heck, I bet they’re marvellous. Props to women for sucking dick, but guys are just naturals to it.” 

Chris looks at you with disbelief and you look back at him, willing him to challenge you on this argument. “All I said was that, I think, I wouldn’t be good at it.” He reminds you. 

Huh, why were you saying that? 

“I said what I said,” you defend yourself and Chris laughs. “Anyway, why isn’t there a girl giving you a birthday blow-job?” He chokes on the beer he has, coughing as he tries to take a sip when you ask that question. “Stop acting so innocent, Evans. We all know this is your favourite time of year, every girl is suddenly into anal for your birthday.” 

It’s a couple minutes before he has settled, giving you a playful glare. “I don’t know, I wasn’t feeling it from any of the girls at the party. Honestly, I didn’t get any last year either.” 

“Damn,” you mutter with raised eyebrows and Chris shakes his head. “Two years in a row? Chris, there’s a plethora of people willing to do anything, you know that, right?” He nods with a simple shrug. 

“I can’t remember the last time I had my dick sucked,” He admits with a frown, a thoughtful sip of his beer. “Probably, sometime before Endgame began shooting.” 

That’s a...while. Longer than you would’ve expected. Chris is a very attractive guy, you half expect him to have someone on the side. Maybe, not a full time thing but someone he can call up for a bit fun. Yet, almost half a year since he’d done anything. 

That needed to be changed. Pronto. 

“Unconventional offer,” You begin, “but this wouldn’t be my first time giving a bro-job.” 

“A what now?” 

You roll your eyes, “I’m your bro, right? I’ll suck your dick, no questions asked. Don’t make it weird, it’s just a bro doing a favour.” 

The explanation should make him laugh, you hoped anyway. Instead he’s silent, watching you and for a moment you think, maybe, just maybe, you might have offended him. Of course, you’re best friends and this could potentially make things awkward. 

“Okay,” he shrugged nonchalantly and that throws you off now. “Well, you offered.” 

Instead of questioning his willingness you get off of the sofa, settling between his legs but avoiding looking into his eyes, for now. You work on unbuttoning his pants, pulling the zipper down and he helps by lifting his hips as you pull his jeans and briefs down. 

His cock is only half-hard, heavy and dribbling a small amount of pre-cum from the tip. It’s long and girthy, exactly what you expected but a little bigger than you’ve ever taken before. You spit in your palm and wrap the hand around him already slowly working him. He gets harder in your hand as you lick the pre-cum away, it’s a slow process till he’s extremely hard in your grasp. 

That’s when you really begin. 

Once he’s rockhard, you take the tip into your mouth lightly suckling the head. Pulling out the salty pre-cum from the tip, flattening your tongue against the underside of his dick before taking more of him into your wet, hot mouth. A loud groan comes from him, you finally look up and see his head is thrown back. One of his hands holds the back of your head, keeping your mouth on his cock. 

You start to work your mouth down his length, breathing evenly through your nose as you nudge him down your throat. Your gag reflex coming in strong as you have his entire length settled in your mouth, your nose brushing against the trimmed pubic hair he has. 

“Fuck!” he chokes and looks down at you, “swallowed my cock whole, filthy slut.” 

You swallow around his length, throat tightening around his length and he releases a groan. Your jaw aches from having it stretched so wide, so full too. You start to bob your head, practically choking yourself on his cock as you fuck your throat. 

Your own jeans becoming tight around the crotch area, your own cock aching for attention. This isn’t about you, it’s about Chris and you doing him a favour, so you forget about the hardness in your pants and double your efforts. 

Saliva and cum dribbles from the corners of your mouth, slurping and choking sounds coming from your slicked up mouth. Everything about this is dirty and sinful. You’re sucking your friends dick, nothing about this is sweet or innocent. And Chris is enjoying it. 

Hands on your head, his hips lifting to meet your mouth to fuck it generously. He’s panting above you, chest heaving and eyes darkened but not leaving your face. It’s like he’s a different person, not that you minded. If anything this side of Chris is, somehow, in some way hotter to you. 

“Oh, god,” he groans out loudly, eyes rolling into the back of his head, “can I fuck you? Let me fuck you.” He stutters out when you grip his balls. 

You pull off his cock with a slurp and a pop, looking up at him for a moment. A whimper escapes his throat when you’re not around him anymore, a thick string of saliva connects you to his dick and more is dribbling down your chin. 

“You sure?” You asked rubbing at the bulge in your jeans, the thought of getting fucked by him just making you want to explode. 

“Fuck yes.” 

That’s all you need, you’re standing up on shaky legs with achy knees. You button your pants and pull them down, trying to pull your shirt off. It’s a flurry of clothes being removed from the both of you, you look at Chris and allow your eyes to roam over his naked torso. 

But he seems to have other plans, grabbing and pulling you back to the sofa. Your hands clutch the armrest ahead of you, knees spread and ass in the air as Chris has one knee on the sofa and the other leg on the floor. 

He spreads your asscheeks apart, spitting on your quivering hole and you groan at the feeling of it dripping down before it can go anywhere he’s swirling the spit around your tight ring. Fingertips dipping inside of you, you shakily sigh when a finger slips in and he starts to fuck you with it. Adding another finger, your thighs are shaking already just from having his thick digits inside of you. 

“Don’t wanna hurt you, but fuck I just wanna fuck you already.” he admits and your eyes roll into the back of your head when a third finger is scissored inside of you. 

He fingers your ass for a few minutes, spitting to add more lubrication before he eventually pulls his messy fingers from you. Pumping his cock with spit slicked fingers and lining himself up, you feel the fat tip prod your opening. 

Even with the slight prep it’s still on the side of pain when he pops the head in, your hole stretching around him and he sinks in slowly. Hands grip your hips in a bruising embrace, he allows you to adjust once he’s fully settled inside. Your cock is leaking pre-cum and smearing onto his sofa, but neither of you seem to care about it. 

Chris pulls back a couple of inches before slamming back in, you groan and squeeze your eyes shut. His hand slinks up your back and gripping the back of your neck in a tight grip, you know you’re in for the ride of your life. He starts pounding into you, showing little mercy on you. He fucks you with long, hard strokes. The tip of his more than impressive length hitting your prostate everytime. 

You choke on air, your lungs barley filled because he’s fucking the life out of you. His other moves and wraps around your cock, loosely wrapping around it, so that every jolt of his hips has your cock fucking into his hand. 

“Fuck, I’m going to cum.” You admit and bite your lip, feeling your balls tighten and your cock starting to twitch. Chris has the audacity to chuckle darkly at you, every thrust in he grinds his hips so that his cock head brushes against your prostate. 

“Go on then,” he leans his body down, torso against your back and mouth beside your ear. “Cum in my hand because you can’t hold it, can’t even wait for me, can you? So desperate.” 

You groan and start meeting his thrusts, pushing back against him- almost like you were chasing his dick every time it started to withdraw. It’s a few more thrusts and you’re cumming with a shout, spilling over his hand and sofa, it’s hot and sticky but you don’t care. Chris continues to fuck you, wrapping his hand tighter around your cock as you cum. He squeezes and milks your dick of it’s release, you whimper as he continues to stroke your cock even after everything had spilled. 

“Cum inside of me, please.” You look over your shoulder, meeting his eyes and he bites his bottom lip harshly. 

You can tell his close by the way his eyes glaze over, a stuttered groan escaping him when he continues to pound into your overused hole. He pulls up off of you, hands gripping your asscheeks and spreading them so he can watch exactly where his cock slips in and out of you. 

“You want it all inside of you, huh?” He asked with a cock smirk and you nod, unable to form words. “Gonna fill your ass up.” He throws his head back and moans loudly. 

You feel the hot load shoot inside of you, he doesn’t stop fucking you as he cums. Short thrusts and deep thrusts as he continues to cum inside, it feels never ending as load after load is fucked into you. Some of it dribbling around his cock and down your quivering thighs, it’s a few short minutes before he stops and pants for air. 

You hiss when you feel Chris slip his cock from you asshole, his eyes watch your sloppy hole clench around nothing and is puffy from being overworked. He sits back against the sofa, dick now soft but wet and between his legs. He looks over to see you belly down on the sofa, one leg hanging off and on the floor. 

His dick twitches when he sees his cum spilling out of your ass, it’s going to stain his sofa but he doesn’t care right now. You look completely fucked out, but he can feel himself getting up for round two. Briefly wondering if you’d be up for another load in you. 

“How many of those bro favours do you give out?” He asked and he heard you chuckle, your shoulder shaking and pushing yourself up. 

“You’re the birthday boy, however many you want.”

(As a lesbian woman, I need to say, I’ve never had straight sex... I’ve watched gay porn, cause me and my friends LOVE to laugh at porn plots sometimes, so be nice to me... I’m not very adapt with sex stuff (unless its fxf) love you all- Rosalie)

[youareunbearable]

Catch me not having a clue who any of these gods(?) and people are, but still sitting here like, "I ship that pretty one with the gruff one, and that brown haired one with the other(?) gruff one?" without knowing names or what this is except the fanart I see you reblog, because this fandom apparently has lots of nice art

Fam i have no idea what ur talking about or when u sent this im so sorry asfkjhfkjhf but i thiiiinnnkkkk??????? it’s “Heavens Official Blessing” or  Tiān Guān Cì Fú (TGCF for tagging stuff) its originally a chinese gay novel that is soooooooo long by the author  Mo Xiang Tong Xiu (MXTX) who wrote 2 (two?????) other novels that I know of that are also gay historical fantasy but i personally havent actually read TGCF???? im just watching the anime and looking at the wiki and reading fanfics so i have a vague idea whats going on but not really???? so i cant really give a good review BUT i LOVE THE CHARACTERS MXTX WRITES SO MUCH AFHAFKFHKFAKF IM SO SORRY IM SHIT WITH TAGGING SO U HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IM HYPER FIXATING ON BUT

LISTEN

LISTEN 

LISTEN

Pretty one and the gruff one im THINKING is He Xuan (or Ming Yi/ Ming-Xiong/Ming Bro) for the grumpy one and Shi Qingxuan for the pretty one and both are kinda gender fluid?? (more Shi Qingxuan but they both change their forms to be both women and men which is Iconic and the anime put her in the TRANS FLAG COLOUR instead of her canon white and green which is ICONIC) AND THHEYRE SO TRAGIC AND HOT AND I CRY JUST THINKING ABOUT THEIR STORY LIKE AFHDFKJAFDSGS like i want to kinda read the book just for them, the two super minor characters, but i also read somewhere that their story doesn’t really have a clean ending so im also holding back from just getting Emotionally Hurt because im a cancer and i know it’ll wreck me

I think The Two Gruff Idiots are Feng Xin (dark haired gruff boy) and Mu Qing (brown haired gruff boy) and theyre both martial gods and both knew each other for over 800 years and both tried to take care of Actual Human And Heavenly Disaster Xie Lian, failed, and tried to do it again 800 years later but with stupid glasses with moustaches in hopes that Xie Lian cant figure out that they care about him but OOPS Xie Lian does in fact have the braincell of the three of them fajfafjajf 

Heres the link to watch the anime, there are 11 eps rn but it updates every weekend (I dont actually know when but i watch it on sundays) Make sure u have ur ad block on tho lol there is a manga too and the art style is TO DIE FOR like its GORGEOUS but its roughly at the same pace as the anime so eh

Heres where to read the whole thing online, just a warning its BIG AS FUCK like 244? plus extras I think?? 

I’d also recommend MXTX’s other books!

Mo Dao Zu Shi (or Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation/ The Untamed/MDZS) is both a Book as well as an Anime (the whole thing is on youtube) , a Live Action which you can watch on Netflix (look up Untamed, also a warning, the plot is a little different from the book and anime cause of uhhh censorship?? also i guess to make it more live drama friendly, my friends an i binged it and really liked it, but some of the fandom doesn’t), a manga which is not finished I think???? idk im not caught up, and a fucking chinese AUDIO DRAMA LIKE BITCH ITS SO WELL DONE but i have to stop listening sometimes cause like there is a difference between watching/reading characters kiss, and then like just hearing them, i get so embarrassed i have to skip the kissing scenes and god forbid i accidentally click on the smutty extras alfjajlfjalfjaljf u can find it on youtube, i linked the one i listen to but i havent finished it and i don’t think it’s all of it, but you can find other episodes/chapters easily

Its about 1 Dumb Yet So Smart gay/bi man (Wei Wuxian) who honestly tries his fucking best, fucks up everything, dies for over a decade, and then is forcefully brought back to life to solve a murder mystery with the guy who has been in Super Gay Love with him since they were teens (Lan Zhan), a bunch of teens Who Are Just Honestly Here For A Good Time And Yet (Lan Juniors, Jin Ling, and Best Boy Ouyang Zizhen ) while badly hiding his real identity from all the people he knows, including his foster brother (Jiang Cheng) who is out for blood and hunting his ass down with a whip and also Lan Zhan who is travelling with him. Also the Killer. There is a killer on the loose and is willing to murder whoever to keep their secrets. Also Nie Huaisang. I adore him and his brother Nie Mingjue, if there is one bitch u gotta remember from this summary it’s this little twink (he and his brother also have a fucking spin off movie from the live action drama THAT I HAVENT BEEN ABLE TO FIND A ENGLISH SUB VERSION AND ITS BEEN KILLING ME SINCE I STARTED WATCHING THIS SHOW LAST YEAR. GOOGLE GIVE ME MY FAVOURITE TWINK AND HIS BEAR OF A BROTHER HAVING A FUN FAMILY ROAD TRIP!!!!!!!)

My Personal Current Favourite is Scum Villain’s Self Saving System (SVSSS) which is SOOOOOOO FUNNY Like it’s not as popular cause the comic was discontinued, and the anime looks like its from 2005 with the weird 3D animation but its my current comfort media!!! 

Its basically about a spite reading millennial (Shen Yuan) who died after reading a REALLY awful popular cheesy smut harem novel (think like 50 shade series but worse cause the protag had 600 wives) and was forced into the body of a minor but important villain (the protagonist’s teacher, Shen Qingqiu) from the novel who was fated to die with all his limbs cut off and his eyes and tongue plucked out and is told he has to fix the story so its not trash, he reasonably freaks the fuck out and hugs the protagonists (Luo Binghe) thigh so hard he turns him gay without realizing. Sadly, he does have to make sure certain plot points happen, which fucks him over a lot,  and he thinks Luo Binghe still wants to kill him instead of love him cause he has the Emotional Intelligence of a Rock, but its so funny reading about him handling all the awful tropey stuff, like imagine u have to be a character in My Immortal But With Porn?????? without breaking out of character too much?? I wouldn’t be able to handle it ajhakfkfhjfj He also finds out that he’s not the only transmigrator in the novel either, but it doesn’t matter cause theyre both So Fucking Stupid Collectively but everyone would honestly die for the both of them

warning for this story though, the main relationship is a teacher/student relationship, but nothing happens until the student is in his 20s and also kinda not his student anymore cause he’s running hell??? but if that squicks u out i totally understand and offer you to PLEASE still enjoy some of this media, and instead of the BingQiu ship, I offer you the LiuQiu one, where both me and the main character cry over how a beautiful man/fellow immortal lord loves the main character so much that he literally fought every day for 5 years to be by his side and I Think Thats Beautiful and I kinda like this ship more than the main one tbh PLEASE just look at the art for Liu Qingge because i love him so much, he’s like if you took Lan Zhan and Jiang Cheng from MDZS and mashed them into one beautiful man the author is trying to tell me is straight but u take one look at him And Tell Me Otherwise

[stesichoreanpalinode]

Wow uh I’d really love to read that Crystal interview 👀👀👀 I always love reading his stories they’re all fantastic. So um what exactly did he do for Roger? I mean I know he was technically his personal manager/assistant but was there actually all that much “managing” going on? Because based on his stories I’m not so sure there was 🤔 which is what I assume your “personal manager still loling” tag is getting at yes? jfjsgjgshsgs Anyway i can’t imagine anyone in that band ever being managed tbh especially not Roger. Oh btw was he ALWAYS with Roger? Or just occasionally when Roger needed him?

LOL, ‘what exactly did he do for Roger’, I’m sure he often asked himself that...

OK, here we have to distinguish slightly between real life, where one very successful adult male employed another adult male in a professional context, exactly to make life easier for him in various ways so that he could focus on making music, and fandom ‘roger and crystal’ where Roger is anything between giant BABY and walking disaster. I think a lot of us when we see Roger and Crystal go into ‘fandom roger and crystal’ mode. Crystal’s stories do tend towards that view of things, but that’s I think quite nice and clever on his part - his stories put Roger in a comical light but never make him out to be nasty or sordid, and he doesn’t say things that would make Roger’s then-girlfriend Dominique or his children upset. None of the ‘phwoar, life on the road, fifty girls every night, let me tell you’ attitude that you find in some roadies. Roger as far as I know has never actually spoken about Crystal on the record other than occasional references during the time Crystal was employed by the Queen organisation which are all positive.

So now my take on what Crystal’s role actually involved. He started out as Roger’s roadie pure and simple. After a certain point he, and I think Ratty, were added to Queen’s payroll so that they were permanent employees and not just hired when the band were on tour. Partly, at a time when they were recording all over the place, this enabled Roger to have his ever more complicated drums moved through customs as necessary, but it also meant that Crystal was there to do for Roger some of the stuff that Paul Prenter did for Freddie - the tedious practical things to do with travel that no-one really enjoys (have you got your passport?) but also like a lot of really good roadie assistants - Mal Evans with the Beatles or Bob Pridden with The Who - he became a personal assistant/gopher/trusted companion. I think it’s really interesting that this happened at a time when the band’s longtime friend/roadie John Harris had to leave because of illness, and also the band was slightly starting to separate out - John and Brian often travelling with wife and children, and they both had kids a couple of years before Roger started - and Freddie starting to hang out with boyfriends and a gay entourage. While Roger and Freddie remained good friends, if all the stories are true, they both wanted to do a lot of offstage shagging, only in rather different directions.

So Crystal’s role changed over time to someone who was, yes, paid to be Roger’s attendant, wing man, and go-to person to do anything from the roadie stuff to more personal assistant style work, but also someone Roger could rely on to be supportive and effective but also good fun, not out to screw Roger over either in money or in selling him out to the press, and, probably, not a pushover. It’s really hard to tell how much he actually had to do, but some of the stories suggest that while the band were recording he was ‘on-call’ (like the one wher he is living ‘on campus’ in Duckingham Palace) and others that when they weren’t working, he had his own life, but if Roger called and said ‘fancy a trip to Monaco’ he would probably be expected to go unless he had a really good reason not to.

My favourite Roger and Crystal story is the one about ski-ing. Crystal is expected to go on the Alps trip, that’s his personal assistant role, but Roger made a whole big effort to take Crystal for ski-ing lessons in Aviemore so that he could enjoy himself the next time they went ski-ing in the Alps. By the standards of personal assistants, that’s being a prince among employers. You can see why Crystal put up with the fact that he was working for someone who couldn’t get in a car without it blowing him up...

TL;DR

[rawrroarart]

Diakko!Odyssey AU

Most recent update: 8/28/2020 I added the comic of them meeting and also wrote a little snippet under the Diakko section

Welcome all. This post will officially be my master post of the Odyssey AU which will be updated as time moves forward so that I can link all of my related art to it. Yes I will not be posting multiple separate Updates in text posts how it’s traditionally done, but instead there will be information with each art and then a link back to this post. This is to avoid clutter since I hardly post on this blog anyway so it wouldn’t be fun having to scroll through all of my “OH ALSO THIS HAPPENS!” to get to art. Also I keep changing my mind on a lot of things in the AU so disregard information under the arts anyway as I will be posting here what is actually relevant.

Another key thing: I will be avoiding spoilers as much as possible until they are either shown in art or stated explicitly like I do in posts because I am the absolute worst at surprises. But anyway fear not for spoilers. Things said here are things that should be hinted at/known already. (and also I hardly know anything but maybe I will in due time)

Without further ado..

Introduction

What is the Odyssey AU?

The odyssey au is an alternative universe combining both Assassin’s Creed: Odyssey and Little Witch Academia into this (very random) adventuring story that takes place in ancient Greece. I guess I can’t say that it’s random since one of my favorite things about both ACO and LWA is the ties/references to mythology with the former obviously more rooted in the mythology and the latter just fun easter egg references. 

The general premise is that Diana is a misthios(mercenary) who travels with Akko, a shapeshifter, across Greece to find the answers pertaining to her origin.

The first art post: Diana and Akkoros

While living her life as a misthios, Diana searches for the answers pertaining to her origin and superhuman (described as “magical”) abilities along with Shapeshifter Atsuko, who commonly uses her powers for flight, but is not shy to switch to animals more suited for combat.

But I don’t know what Assassin’s Creed: Odyssey is?

That’s fair and understandable. Honestly my AU diverges a lot from the game so I don’t think knowledge of ACO is exactly necessary it’s just fun to understand the connections if you know them. Basically the key things you need to know from ACO as of now is: 

Kassandra (the protag) is known as the Eagle Bearer because she has an eagle that is known as the “eagle of Zeus” throughout the game. And they adventure together and Ikaros (the eagle) can hunt n kill things and See things and tbh he’s rly just a cool eagle but not a shapeshifter or anything lol

Kassandra is a Mercenary (misthios) which is basically a for Hire fighter/person who will p much do anything for money (if they want to do it) 

Kassandra is usually referred to a demi-god because of her powerful fighting abilities in which I mean yea she literally has powers and can blast people like a billion miles away (im jk but-)

Kassandra can tame animals (which ones depending on your skill level). You can tame uhh wolves, lynx, leopards, lions, bears. This is where my ‘shapeshifter’ idea began and it pretty much fit perfectly since Akko’s favorite spell is the shapeshifting one. 

Other than this, the most important things to know for this AU is just,, general mythology,, I guess? Or history? General history of mythology and how people worshipped/acted in accordance to the gods. And I’m not saying im going to be historically accurate obviously, nor even mythologically accurate (if that’s even a thing lol), I’m just here to have a good time and enjoy my gay mercenaries while talking about gods/goddesses as if I even know (thankfully I have my gf who is way more interested in mythology than me to help me)

I’ve only played like half of the Atlantis DLC after beating the game so whoopsie. I honestly really wanna replay everything now that I have this AU just so I can focus more on details and what I can yoink.

Characters

Diana

Art: 

Diana’s sketch-dump though she really needs a new one.

Diana in wheat field

Diana is the main protagonist of the story, but they pretty much both share the spotlight anyway. Her goal is to find out why she has certain powers (which I have officially decided, finally...) that aren’t exactly human. Since being a misthios was an easy way for her to travel and make drachmae, she chooses to do it while on their journey. Dammit I came up with her lore but as per the rules of this masterpost I can’t write about it until it’s out smh.. Ah I forgot that I already spilled that she is a goddess/demi-goddess (haven’t decided which yet) so yea that’s the Tea.

Described as very beautiful, there are rumors of her that state she is a pathway to Elysium (despite many people not deserving to go to Elysium). She is also known for her stoic face and a red bird that follows her around.

Diana is only found smiling with Akko and keeps buying Akko clothes despite her outer grievances each time Akko destroys something.

Diana was there with her mother at Chariot’s speech/performance.

Diana is skilled with any weapon.

Akko

Art:

Akko sketch-dump

Akko is a shapeshifter who travels with Diana across Greece in search for her idolized Chariot. Trusting both Diana’s skills and powers, Akko decides that Diana is the best choice to help achieve her goal as they adventure together.

Orphaned at a young age, Akko is, at first, very unfamiliar with how exactly to use her powers because there was no one around to teach her. She uses a bird most often because it is her first and most skilled transformation, but eventually learns to use stronger animals over time. Also eagle-vision is much more useful to Diana when they’re scoping the grounds anyway.

Like all shapeshifters, Akko has a symbol on her neck that signifies what she is. Due to the high prejudice against shapeshifters, Akko stays an animal to avoid being known, and also does not transform in front of others unless to kill them. If she has to be a human, Akko commonly wears a hood to hide her neck. 

Akko is one of the last shapeshifters to exist, and, despite Chariot being rumored to have finally been murdered, she still believes Chariot is alive. 

Akko was with her parents when they all attended Chariot’s final speech/show and here began her dream.

Akko can use a dagger if she needs to.

Side-characters

Akko’s Parents: Shapeshifters who were murdered when Akko was a young age.

Chariot: A shapeshifter who somehow had a voice and power that even normal people listened to. Akko idolizes Chariot because, despite the hate against shapeshifters, Chariot was well known and was an activist for shapeshifters despite the danger upon her head. Chariot mysteriously disappears one day for reasons unknown, and everyone but Akko assumes she was finally murdered.

Shapeshifters

Shapeshifters are defined as humans who possess the ability to transform to any animal at will. Unfortunately, because animals were seen as less than human, shapeshifters were defined as “punished by the gods” and so many decided shapeshifters needed to be removed from the world for sin. This causes a massacre of shapeshifters to the point that they are instead a rarity.

Shapeshifters do not transform with their clothes, and so either destroy them or lose them depending on their transformation.

All shapeshifters have a symbol on their neck which is what is used to find them. They can also be found by their human personalities/characteristics when they are an animal. 

If weakened, shapeshifters return to their human form and cannot transform until they are stronger.

Diakko

Art:

Meeting (Comes with a 500 word story!)

Misthios!Diana and Shapeshifter!Akko Sketch-dump

Diana and Bear!Akko

Fancy Diakko (the first continuity error lol)

Diana and Akko adventure together and do all of their quests together as a rag-tag chaotic duo. God I’m so excited for this section I wish I could make art FASTER but anyway:

They meet at about 17 years old but the main story takes place when they are 18+

The two get off to a wrong start when Diana saves Akko’s life. Because Akko is a shapeshifter, she’s high in value to kill probably by some cult idk but there is always a bounty on her head. When Diana saves her, Akko assumes Diana only did so to steal the drachmae from the original perpetrators, but Diana really just leaves her alone afterwards. Confused, Akko legit just starts tagging along LMAO she finds Diana interesting and so follows her and Diana’s just like what the fuck but eventually she gets over it. They become powerful assets to each other as Diana can now scope the skies with Akko and Akko is pretty much protected under Diana. Then when Akko gets much stronger Diana gets extra manpower and protection too. 

Akko enjoys staying in her human form to spend time with Diana.

Diana keeps buying Akko clothes just because it makes Akko happy (and also, despite Akko uncaring because her transformations are so frequent anyway, Diana doesn’t want her to be naked??)

Diana is easily persuaded by Akko and puts Akko’s interests first (feeds her first, considers what Akko would want, etc.)

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

finally. i decided to do this. anyways hello there, i am jake and today i want to talk about something; you see, if you are in the tf2 fandom, you probably know about heavymedic. Wherther you are a hardcore gamer who resents f2p’s or a person that never played the game but has trillions of notes on their art- you know heavymedic exists and most of all you probably ship it.

And I find that weird. In the few fandoms in my life I have been in I had never seen a single ship be so widely if not shipped, then accepted. Sure, maybe everyone in the GF fandom knows what Billdip is - for better or for worse. Sure, maybe the HS fandom is 70% shipping.

But I have never ever seen such a phenomenon in a prominent multiplayer game fandom. A fandom, sadly, oftentimes filled with toxicity. Overwatch is very similar here - yet ships are either a hot topic of discussion or straight up ignored. But TF2? In here for whatever reason we ship these two mercenaries. And in this essay I will try and find a reason or two why is that.

Apologies for any mistakes or incoherency. English is not my first language, I need to ramble, and my vocabulary is all over the place.

Content warning: mentions of homophobia, blood, death, mentions of WLW fetishization, nsfw mention. Also MASSIVE SPOILERS FOR THE TF2 COMICS.

Part 1: Canonical Evidence and Interactions

Let’s be honest: I could ramble about this one for days on end. But I’ll try and keep it short.

First and foremost we have the official videos. And of course the first thing that comes to mind is Meet the Medic.

At the very start of the part where Medic himself appears, we see him telling a joke about a particularly gruesome situation to Heavy.

He laughs along with him, visibly enjoying his company. He even smiles as he waits for another joke. Heavy only shows genuine fear a lot later.

And of course this damn scene always cracks me up. Medic slightly pinches Heavy’s cheek and strokes his lip gently (the other part is almost not noticeable unless you play the video at slow speed).

Of course we all know about the Hand Hold that happens somewhere halfway in the vid. I don’t think I have to explain the gayness in that. The fact their hands stay interlocked even after Medic helps Heavy up. The deep breath Medic takes because even he cannot handle the emotions. That few seconds is unresolved sexual tension manifest.

Overall the short shows a strong feeling of trust between these two. Medic confides in Heavy and reverse. Yeah he puts a baboon heart into his friend’s chest cavity but the fact (as proven at the end of the video) that Heavy was the first one to have an Ubercharge implanted into him shows that Medic at the very least considers him a lab rat.

I treat End of the Line as non-canonical, as do many others, and as such won’t discuss it here. But it will forever crack me up that Valve endorsed such levels of homoerotic subtext.

These two have some short moments in other videos, like for example in Invasion Heavy helps Medic up (CINEMATIC PARALLELS) but it’s nothing major so I guess I’ll skip forward.

Second is their interactions ingame. You might call me a weirdo for trying to find stuff in there but holy shit I have things to say and I’m going to say them.

You thought I was going to fanboy over the “i love this doktor” voiceline huh? Well not really. I wish these two had unique lines if they assist one another.

Heavy is literally listed on the official wiki as the “ideal medic buddy” and multiple pages on that exact wiki say some pretty interesting things.

I have to say something about the Gentleman’s Ushanka and/or Pocket Medic. They are both community cosmetics - but the fact they both got accepted by Valve says a lot. Above is text snipped from the actual wiki.

Last but not least: The Comics. Darned comics. The pair of mercenaries has basically no interaction - unless you count issue 6.

Heavy getting absolutely PISSED when Medic is killed by Ch*avy. Their reunion. Medic referring to Heavy by “my friend” in a totally straight way. Kind of sad Valve wasted an opportunity for them to hug. Maybe they knew their comic artist ships them and wanted to avoid having to answer the Question™.

Part 2: Dynamics

This part’s a bit trickier, mostly due to the reason that I’m new to this whole dynamic analysis thing. Yeah I’m good at spotting canonical evidence but very specific shipping dynamics often escape my gaze.

The most obvious one is Big Guy, Little Guy. Quoting the TVTROPES page:

[…] This trope describes a pair of guys who always fight together, are best friends forever, and quite often have a very obvious hierarchy: The little guy is often in charge […] The little guy is usually listed first, since he’s the leader, and they are always listed together, as if they are one entity. In fact, some episodes may center on the fact that they can’t live without each other. […] If this is a case of Brains and Brawn, the Big Guy is usually the Brawn, and the Little Guy the Brains. It’s almost never the other way around, but in some cases the Big Guy can be rather smart too. […]

A sub-type of this, a common favorite here on Tumblr is known as “small chaotic big calm” and hoo boy if that isn’t these two. I don’t really have much to say here - again I am not an expert.

Part 3: Fandom Impact

So you don’t think Red Oktoberfest (as Heavymedic is sometimes called) is super popular on anywhere else than Tumblr? Wrong.

It’s hard to find TF2 fics on Archive of Our Own not tagged with Heavy/Medic. Of course most of them only contain hints to their relationship but go in the main tf2 tag and I can guarantee you, you’ll gonna see “implied heavy/medic” all the time.

But these two go further than AO3 or Tumblr or Instagram or whatever. They are recognized even within the wider circle of the fanbase. Take this SFM, for example. (I am using the Saxxy Awards version of Secret Lives here mostly due to the fact that the Heavymedic moment is much gayer. In the normal version, the dialogue isn’t changed, but they simply hold hands.)

But it gets deeper. (WARNING: THE GAY MOMENT IN THIS ONE IS NSFW. NOT EXPLICITLY SO BUT JUST A HEADS UP TUMBLR PLEASE DO NOT FLAG ME)

And the best part? The comments are extremely positive. You’d expect hoards upon hoards of homophobes screeching but no, the comments are supportive. Even on places such as Reddit or Youtube, comments like “yeah they’re gay and in love” do not get downvoted/disliked to hell; in fact the opposite.

Part 4: Canon Status

Let’s be real. Most ships are shipped because people want to explore the dynamics in fanfic, fanart or something else. But Heavymedic is shipped because… well, I have no idea.

Actually, I kind of do - but only theories. You see, while the canonical evidence is here, the creators have never said anything about them. No confirmation, no disproval, no hinting, nothing.

But the ship is so prominent! There has to be something causing this!- you say. And to that I present you 2 theories on why Heavy/Medic is so popular.

Theory number 1 states that we simply all choose to interpret their interactions as homoerotic. And this is very easy to disprove - there’s simply no way we just collectively agreed on these matters out of nothing. There has to be something bigger.

And theory 2 states that, well, our interpretation is the desired interpretation. But this is even more ridiculous than theory 1 for a number of reasons. If they are in fact gay, why hasn’t Valve made them canon yet?

A Theoretical Scenario

I am going to ramble big time on this one, so buckle up lads. I’ll discuss a theoretical scenario in which, well, if that was not obvious, Valve confirms Heavymedic as canon. Maybe then we will see why they will probably never do so.

TF2 is considered by typical capital G, alt-right Gamers as a “non-political” game. This means no women (in the game itself, at least, and if even, sexy women only), no queer folk and no minorities (for some reason they accept Demoman but throw a fit if someone draws any other merc as not being pearl white). Team Fortress 2 was around before Gamergate and other things like Gamers Rise Up. It’s a classic and Valve is regarded as the good guy to Epic Game’s bad guy. If Valve did anything to confirm doubts, wherther it be clearing up popular fanon or confirming ships, these people would throw hands. (Although they seemed to ignore when one of the writers confirmed Miss Pauling is a lesbian. Huh.) Even those that don’t play TF2 would come to the aid of their bros.

Let me illustrate with two very similar examples. In both cases these confirmations were the first made by the company as a whole, both are fairly recent and both confirm a character as gay.

First we have the confirmation of Tracer from Overwatch as a lesbian. It was done in one of OVW’s comics. Tracer is the FACE of Overwatch as a whole and while most of the fanbase accepted it (thankfully the Gamers are reluctant to infest ow), some people threw what I can only describe as a hissy fit. At least her girlfriend’s a background character.

Second is Neeko from League of Legends. Unlike Tracer she was added a while before it was confirmed she was gay. LOL is much more toxic and filled with Gamers than OW and holy shit people smeared LOL so much.

Of course these are not accurate to Heavy/Medic. In both of the cases I listed it was girls being wlw and we all know how much cisgender heterosexual gamers LOVE yuri porn. Apparently only girls can be gay because they can jack off to it - if it’s two guys then it’s disgusting. Nevertheless I think these are good approximations - in every case the company gets “shat on” on social media and other sites. With the community that Valve has, I think even if they wanted them to be gay, they would never ever confirm it.

Conclusion

I’m sorry for that ending. I had to theorize a bit. Regardless I’d love if you shared this on other sites, reblogged or whatever - I wasted at least 1 and a half hours of my life on it. Feel free to cite this as a source if someone asks you why you ship the big heavy weapons expert and the feral battle medic.

[rainbowserenity]

I finished the FF7 Remake, and oh boy do I have THOUGHTS!!!! It’s been like an hour and a half and I’m still riding that high omg

if this was just the first part, I can only imagine how the rest of the game’s gonna go...

Anyway, rambly thoughts under this beautiful screenshot of Tifa I took:

- This game was seriously SO FUN???? I honestly can’t remember the last time I had so much FUN with a game...they really did so well with all the gameplay mechanics and having a good balance of everything, so A++++ for that!

- They weren’t kidding when they said this would basically be a ~full~ game on its own, despite only being the first episode....I got close to 50 hours of gameply (although a lot of it was just me farting around doing nothing lmao) and nothing felt like it was lacking :D

- I really liked (most) of the new VAs! I was kinda worried about Barrett in the trailers, but he came through for me lolol even the NPCs sounded awesome!

- We all know Don Corneo’s a pig, but I actually really enjoyed his scenes because his VA was clearly having so much fun with it ahaha~ And I LOVE that they kept in the “I’ll cut them off/smash them/rip them off” lines pffft. Too classic!

- I LOOOOVE all the stuff they elaborated on....it was nice to see more of Midgar and hang out with the AVALANCHE nerds. I remember not really giving much of a fuck when they died in the OG, but I was full on sobbing at Jessie’s death scene in this game a;lskjf;laiwjef

- I thought the battle with Rude was kinda clever, that he wouldn’t really hurt Aerith but just kept putting her to sleep when you switched over to her...so RUDE hahahaha B)

- I WAS NOT EXPECTING TO SEE CAIT SITH???!!! It makes me wonder if they’re gonna have a different way of introducing him, or if he’s gonna have a different sort of role...maybe Reeve will finally tell us how he operates a robot cat with a Scottish accent

- I loved the little details in the animation, like how when you climbed all the stairs in the Shinra building (because of course I did that lmao), Cloud gradually got slower and slower...or how when you controlled Tifa, she was naturally faster. And how Barrett sort of ‘limped’ when he climbed the ladders cause he just has one hand......I love tiny details and effort like that ahhh it warms my cold black heart!!!

- speaking of which, if you watch Red XIII pull the levers....you can kind of see how he’ll be able to pull off the sailor suit later on lmao I love him

- WALL MARKET!!!!!!! Definitely my favorite chapter omg alskdjflaiwejf The dance sequences were PERFECT!!! When did Cloud learn to dance?! I can’t wait to go back and replay that chapter lmao

- AERITH SMACKING THE GRUNTS AROUND WITH A CHAIR ADDED TEN YEARS TO MY LIFE

- So much of the game gave me XIII trilogy vibes....a lot of it was the music, but the gameplay and some bosses made me feel it too :D

- Am I crazy.......or were practically all the scenes with Sephiroth amazingly gay??? like idk if it’s just Hoech doing that, but........damn

- I officially ship Cloud/Tifa/Aerith as an OT3, but Tifa/Aerith were so cute and gay ahhhhhhhh~ Even if you don’t have shipper goggles, they did amazing at really elaborating their friendship!

- Honestly, all of the relationships between everybody were SO well done without it seeming like they were trying too hard. It felt so natural and easy, even between the NPCs, A++++ to the writers

- Battle-wise, I liked playing as Tifa the best, mostly because I typically enjoy using speedy characters. I actually liked playing as Aerith the least, even though I also enjoy using mages...Barrett took some getting used to, but he grew on me. And of course Cloud was lovely~ It’ll be interesting playing as Red eventually, I think he’ll be really fun to control

- I wonder if Yuffie’s eventual appearance will be handled differently, because they really kept emphasizing the whole “AVALANCHE IS WORKING WITH WUTAI!!!!!!!!” angle....and I doubt Yuffie will be an optional party member, so there might be some more story stuff there. I bet with Vincent they’ll just make waking him up mandatory lmao

- Going back to Wall Market....am I crazy, or was Chocobo Sam the only possible straight one of the trio 8D Madam M was clearly pansexual, don’t @ me

- AERITH SAID SHIT

- tbh I’m still trying to wrap my head around the ending, so there may be rambly tags in gifsets eventually, but....

- ZACK???????????????????? EXCUSE ME I WAS NOT EXPECTING TO SEE MY HUSBAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YA’LL SHOULD’VE HEARD THE NOISES I MADE A;SLKDJF;ALWIEJF;ALWIEJF;ALWIJEF;LAWIJEF

- AND THAT “I’LL GO GET KUNSEL” LINE????? EXCUSE ME???????????????????????????????????????? WHY WOULD THEY PLAY MY HEART LIKE THAT?????????????????????????

- ........................................................I don’t much care for Zack’s new VA :(

- Though I think I’m just biased because Rick Gomez was PERFECT and always how I pictured Zack’s voice....this new one just doesn’t quite do it for me and that makes me sad :( - BUT HE’S SO BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ZACK EXIST AND MARRY ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- seriously, how was it possible for him to get MORE beautiful???!!!?? I’m gonna cry just thinking about it rip

- I was talking to a friend about the ending, and she had what I think is a good theory that the Whispers have seen things play out before and this is just a reoccurring timeline. It would explain why Cloud had visions of Aerith praying for Holy, why Tifa saw Meteor, how they saw Red running around in the future... (plus, this was sort of the plot of Type-0, so it wouldn’t be the first time it’s been done lol)

- tbh though, I’m not sure how the possibility of Zack not going to Hawaii will play into things. Cloud’s cocky personality is a result of his trauma from Zack’s trip to Hawaii....so if that happened differently....

- Maybe Asshole Hojo picked Zack up??? Because he did seem to know who Cloud was and was all interested in furthering his ~experiments~ so it’s entirely possibly he’s a dick and has Zack locked up somewhere again....

- OR maybe Zack’s just in hiding and that’s what the “I’LL GO GET KUNSEL” line was all about, since Kunsel knows all?? IDK MY HEAD HURTS

- That being said, I need to think about things more and as I mentioned, there may be rambles in my tags in the coming weeks ahaha~

OVERALL, this game was a BLAST!!!! I loved it so much, and like I said, I can’t remember the last time I had so much fun playing something. 10000000000/10, highly recommended to the world and I can’t wait for the next part!

[tommo-stylinson]

@illbemasculineipromise tagged me to answer these questions! Thank you <3

1. Do you prefer writing with a black pen or a blue pen? Rainbow colours tbh but if it has to be a document or something non-colourful then black

2. Would you prefer to live in the country or in the city? City for sure!!

3. If you could learn a new skill, what would it be? French. Is that a skill? I want to learn more languages 

4. do you drink your tea/coffee with sugar? Never, unless it’s like a latte but I tend to drink my coffee and tea black

5. What was your favourite book as a child? Harry Potter

6. Do you prefer baths or showers? Showers

7. If you could be a mythical creature, which one would you be? A fairy maybe?

8. Paper or electronic books? Electronic purely because I can always have them with me... standing in line at the grocery store? Time to read, fam. 

9. What is your favourite item of clothing? My Louis smiley hoodie (I took the string out and put rainbow laces in it)

10. Do you like your name? Would you like to change it? I like “Alex” but I don’t like “Alexandra” so if I had to change it it would probably be to just “Alex”

11. Who is a mentor to you? I’m drawing a blank. I think I admire specific things in others that I try to replicate, but I wouldn’t say there’s one person who is like the perfect cut-out of a mentor, y’know?

12. Would you like to be famous? If so, what for? I’d be so down. I have no idea for what though, like I’ve always wanted to act so I guess that.

13. Are you a restless sleeper? Not unless I’m beside someone or the room is light. 

14. Do you consider yourself to be a romantic person? No overly. I appreciate some acts of romance but too much sappiness makes me uncomfortable. 

15. Which element best represents you? Air? I don’t know, I’ve never really felt connected to any elements... I say air cause I’m an air sign 

16. Who do you want to be closer to? Louis lol why can’t I just be best friends with him? No but for real, I don’t know, if I want to be close with someone then I’ll make it happen

17. Do you miss someone at the moment? Yea, my friend Chloe from the camp I used to work at. I haven’t seen her since January :(

18. Tell us about an early childhood memory. My friend and I used to act out Harry Potter all the time as Ginny and Cho and one time we jumped on a trampoline for three hours in 35 Celsius in our pjs playing it and pretending to have a snowball fight with Voldemort. 

19. What is the strangest thing you have eaten? Soft shell crabs? Crab isn’t weird obviously but like the soft shell ones are really tiny and you just eat it whole, shell and all. 

20. What are you most thankful for? Music

21. Do you like spicy food? Yeah, but I don’t love adding hot sauce to everything, like sometimes food doesn’t have to be spicy to be good. 

22. Have you ever met someone famous? Like a few Canadian politicians (Harper 🤮 and Nenshi) 

23. Do you keep a diary or journal? Nah

24. Do you prefer to use pen or pencil? Pens!!! I use Staedtler fineliners for everything

25. What is your star sign? Gemini

26. Do you like your cereal crunchy or soggy? Crunchy

27. What would you want your legacy to be? That I contributed something to making a difference in the world

28. Do you like reading? What was the last book you read? I really only read fanfiction cause I find it easier to focus on. The last fanfic I read was Together in  Electric Dreams by harreloujah

29. How do you show someone you love them? Making them laugh, spending time with them, annoying the hell out of them :)

30. Do you like ice in your drinks? Yes!!

31. What are you afraid of? Nothing really. I mean I will jump at jump scares or like I can sike myself up to think there’s a monster going to come out of my closet and like big waves in the middle of the ocean make me a little anxious but I’m not afraid of things really. 

32. What is your favourite scent? Peach or apples

33. Do you address older people by their name or surname? First names!! 

34. If money was not a factor, how would you live your life? Doing the things I enjoy like travelling and hobbies and spending time with people

35. Do you prefer swimming in pools or the ocean? I don’t really love swimming (I did too much competitive swimming to enjoy it anymore) but probably the ocean because I like diving 

36. What would you do if you found $50 on the ground? Leave it there. Unless there was like a homeless person nearby I guess? But I wouldn’t take it or try to find an owner or anything (unless I saw them drop it)

37. Have you ever seen a shooting star? Did you make a wish? Yes, and probably

38. What is one thing you would want to teach your children? To think for themselves and to be kind to everyone

39. If you had to have a tattoo, what would it be and where would you get it? I think the first one I’m going to get is going to be in the same spot/style of Louis’ “Far Away” one, but I’m either going to get “Only the Brave” “Lost In My Head” or “Set Fire To History”

40. What can you hear right now? Nobody Compares by 1Dee

41. Where do you feel the safest? With the people I’m closest to 

42. What is one thing you want to overcome/conquer? Good ol’ depression, babey

43. If you could travel back to any era, what would it be? I have no clue omg... part of me says the 80s and part of me says some ancient time when everyone was hella gay

44. What is your most used emoji? 😂

45. Describe yourself using one word. Loving

46. What do you regret the most? Not figuring out what my interests were before I started Uni and ending up with a generic degree

47. Last movie you saw? Only

48. Last tv show you watched? Down to Earth

49. Invent a word and its meaning. Fialey (which turns out is a last name but I tried 8 different words and they were all French words) but it’s the overwhelming feeling of pure love and adoration you get when you see your lover passionate and excited about things. 

I’m going to tag @that-anxious-blonde @canyonlouis28 @heartstainonthecarpet and @loudlou only do it if y’all feel like it! no pressure :)

[jinxofthedesert]

Hi there! Annoying anon that loves rambling about the Valeska twins is here again 🤣 Let the discussion continue! 😂 Yeah, I totally get your point of writing such stories as a means of fulfilling wishes. I guess it makes sense from the writer's pov that they want to give these characters a different (better) treatment. Valid point, but still, they don't feel real to me.

(Below this is the rest of the messages, put together. Farther down, below the line, are my responses)

It's like I'm reading a story with a character that's called Jerome/Jeremiah Valeska and looks exactly like him, but it's not truly him (just like you said, at their cores they are bad guys). But it's perfectly understandable and all right that people want to give them a rest from their chaotic lives haha 😊 everybody’s got their cup of tea ☕

Damn, yes, these stories are so hard to find! I imagine that writing something of the sort and investing so much in such complex characters can be draining and daunting, so yeah I get the reason why there are not so many fics out there... and OCs are so difficult to write haha you are right. They take too much time and effort 🤣

Yeah, I guess Ecco was not the best example. It's very true what you say about Jeremiah's and Ecco's relationship. In the show it was portrayed as a professional one. So we don't really know if there's anything else beyond that, save for some level of concern. So I guess I should have gone with Bruce instead because, just like you said, Jeremiah went totally bonkers when he realized that Bruce was the only one who saw past his resemblance to Jerome.

Basically, what I was trying to say is that in these fics there's not really that same vibe of evil obsession and lunacy from the twin's side. Maybe just some sort of heightened jealousy when their partner is addressed by other characters, but not in a really "Valeska" way. In fact, it is also strange when Bruce is completely absent in these stories when the twins' obsession revolves around him.

Yeah, there is sooo much to explore, so that is why I am very curious to see how people construe their backgrounds, but usually it's just the repetition of the show with some added scenes and dialogues here and there 😅 I would love to see something a bit different, but well, I guess I am being very demanding 🤣 Don't worry about it and thanks so much for replying! 😘 I am now doing some research in different sites 🤣

It's a bit weird because even though I enjoyed the show, I have to say I merely watched it to see ma broski boys in action 🤣 so If I wasn't so lazy (and didn't have other unfinished projects) I would try to write something (my mind is already full of vague ideas OMGGG 😏🤔😂), but I don't really know much about other characters or subplots, so I would not be sure how to tackle it 🤔 Thanks again for the lovely discussion! 😊

 - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

Hi anon! Don’t you worry about your rambles, they’re not at all annoying! I find it rather fun to discuss the twins. 

I’m sorry you’ve not been able to find the content you’re looking for; usually, I always run into comments on Tumblr or Pinterest about how you look for certain fics and when you can’t find them, then it’s time to try a hand at writing it yourself. I’ve done that and, even though I enjoy writing, it’s still pretty hard, especially to find a drive to do it when I really am not feeling it.  With the twins not feeling real, I understand, ‘course I now think I’m at the point where I might read anything if I’m gifted with more content lol (though there are some tags that, if I see them, I don’t touch if I can help it). 

I think, usually, with most writers, it’s easier to take a character like Jerome/Jeremiah and, instead of doing the tremendous work that comes with trying (emphasis trying) to change them, they do a few things and that’s enough for a road to recovery. Because, most of the time, they’re not writing to change the character, or even to make it realistic; sometimes they’re just writing, or they wanted to try a different aspect. There can be so many reasons and sometimes digging deep and getting a character 100% correct isn’t at the top of the list of what you want in that story. Personally, I’ve learned to broaden my sense of disbelief with characters and just enjoy what I manage to find, especially since the Gotham fic-oriented content is sooooo small 😢

After reading your last message, I actually went onto Ao3 and searched ‘character studies’ under the characters and yeah, there’s not much, I read a few and I honestly wasn’t sure what to think (not to call anyone out). It reminded me a lot of my years reading batjokes on fanfiction or, again, Ao3 where, if you search long enough, there’s a fic for almost all your needs. There have been some good gems in there that delve into character studies and helping these characters try and become better. Comparing that to Gotham’s arrangement of fics is sad, to say the least, but batjokes in all media have a lottttt of years to have such a collection of wonderful content. (Even if you’re only a Gotham fan, stretching out into the actual Batman fandom can be very rewarding, even if your next step is into the Nolan movies or even Batman in general cause you can replace the characters in your head if you really want too)  I think one big problem with Oc’s is that, in a way, they’re easy to make, but in the worst way. You can create a character to put in the place you want, a blank space and they’re just nothing. This comes up a lot in anime type works, where the main character is so blah for the purpose of the audience (reader in our other case) to put themselves in the place of the main character. This also happens in a lot of movies as well, instead of fleshing the character out and allowing them to move and breathe the way THEY would and not how the audience thinks they themselves would. Because of this, oc’s can be very flat. There are the exception, of course although I have no examples since I don’t remember the last Oc story I read . . .  *wracks brain* yeah no idea. Though I’m sure it’s somewhere in my saves.

Even if one doesn’t ship Jeremiah with Bruce, it’s very difficult to ignore/brush under the rug that there was definitely an obsession and that originally, during their weeks of spending time together, building the generator, there started a friendship. The first is very obvious, show-wise (and friendship kinda came with the territory) and the gay subtext can be there if you look at it that way. As much as an interesting character Ecco is, she’s both not important enough in the show (sorry Ecco lovers) or to Jeremiah or to anyone for that matter. While with Bruce and Jeremiah, with how their first meeting go’s and all the meetings that follow after (very willingly on Jeremiah’s part even though I’m sure before this NO ONE was allowed in the inner parts of his bunker for long periods. Probably not even Ecco) the relationship is much more pronounced than anything we’re given prior.  I like to think that even though Bruce was manipulating Jeremiah when they first met, he actually did see him as his own person. Even though he, like Jim and Harvey, have personally bore witness to Jerome’s tyranny. (And that only twists the knife harder when Jeremiah eventually loses his mind because both him and Jeremiah saw him as his own person and in a way Jeremiah doesn’t become like Jerome, he becomes worse)

One could argue that since we didn’t see a ‘true’ way the Valeska’s love that any type of them showing affection might never seem very Valeska. Unless one looks at their reactions and interactions with Bruce as something more than just ‘wanting to kill him’ or ‘obsession’. This would be another reason I’m don’t read much in the oc-area or out of the romantic’s lol mainly because the moment they take Bruce out of the picture, everything seems off. Jerome, while willing to divide his attention, only does it with specific people, who are: Jim, Bruce, Jeremiah, and, on occasion, Oswald (though he’s much less in comparison to the ‘big three’). Other then them, we don’t see him hyper-focus on anyone else in the show, and if he does, it’s for a second and to simply kill them after. If these three aren’t integral to his behavior and actions then things feel flat and out-right ignoring his obsession with Bruce and his inner darkness can be unrealistic. With Jeremiah, this is much worse because in canon, once No Man’s Land starts, all he can think about is Bruce. Everything he does in that setting and before this even started was for Bruce. This type of obsession is . . . well, something that can’t simply be ignored, it’s a big part of his character and also very integral to just who he is after the spray. It may not be as bad at the start of the spray (because he’s too busy rebuilding Gotham in his image) but literally second to that desire is his connection with Bruce. If there were a summary of Jeremiah as a character it would be IMPOSSIBLE to write it without Bruce (same with Jerome though his might be a footnote, depending). So him suddenly focusing on someone else is . . . odd (even with Jim he doesn’t give his full attention too and, in the finale, Jeremiah only starts moving around and doing shit when he realizes that Bruce has come home early and that it’s time to finally come back to the spotlight). Especially since he’s supposed to be the ‘Joker’ in the Gotham world, which, technically speaking, means this obsession with the Bat (a.k.a Bruce) will only ever get worse from here (not to mention the fact he knows Batman is Bruce because he remembers the prophecy Ra’s told him, which we’re shown in the finale when he first sees the Bat and comment’s ‘you’ in a knowing way; this can be argued he’s just recognizing that this is what the prophecy was talking about or that it’s Bruce but personally I think both cause the prophecy was about both of them.).

It’s hard not to repeat things in canon though, believe me, I know and if you ever try writing a time travel story, it’s much worse cause then you have to change literally everything if you’re doing it that way.  Nah, you know what you like; the only problem with that is it’ll be hard to find it most of the time. I wish you luck in searching! Hopefully, you’ll find something.

Same. My older brother introduced me to the show and his way of doing so was first telling me it was a batman show, that I would LOVE Oswald’s aesthetic and that there was a Joker-type character just introduced. I was sold lol. There’s been a lot of drama with the show though, concerning the twins and I honestly wish they’d just stuck with Jerome or if they did still use Jeremiah that he wasn't just . . . a backup plan for killing Jerome off. And, if they’d been allowed to go on for a few more seasons, I wouldn’t have been surprised if they would have also killed Jeremiah and a third (never heard of) Valeska twin (triplet) would show up, playing into the overall Joker lore about there having been three. 😒🤨😑 Which I find humorous because they did so well with Jerome, he was a well-rounded, fleshed out character and, as much as I love Jeremiah, it’s hard not to consider what we could have gotten if Jerome had lived *wistful sigh* I won’t lie that the drama hasn’t affected how I watch it too these days, or at least left me with a lasting impression.  I was very invested in the first few seasons, it was a good show, minus the plot-holes and annoying characters (yes, some annoy me and there are some I can’t stand) but when the twins were on screen, it was probably the show at its best. If they had implicated them more so into the main story I probably would have watched all the way to the end (I can admit, I’ve never seen season five, but I saw many clips, have been completely spoiled and DID watch the finale lol and . . . I think I saw some of season four? Maybe, not sure anymore.) because when they’re also interacting with Bruce, perfection. I could watch that shit for days. 

Also, if you did write it, it wouldn’t have to be about other characters if you don’t want it to be. You’re talking to me, who has never seen the last few seasons and when I wrote my first fic ‘Blindly Evident’ literally all my scenes I had to LOOK UP because I only knew the base of what the scene was even about lol. So sometimes, you can totally bullshit your way lol and somehow it turns out to be really good and you like it. Or it’s just snippets of small scenes with your characters (I’ve been writing a fic like that for awhile because it’s fun and easy and yet you can make it so thought provoking because these snippets are so smallll.) I would implore you to give it a go. Even if you have no idea what the other characters are doing or even what their names are. 

I feel like this has just become me rambling about Gotham and writing tips at this point lol but you’re welcome~ I am here to try and help and always willing to listen about Gotham and talk (or rant, I’m not picky lol). Thanks again for your ask, anon! Hope you find that content you’re looking for 🥰🧡💛

[the-blueberry-jellyfish]

Discord Exchange

Just gonna post the bios and stuff here so it's all together and organized. Whoever gets me can pick anyone from this list, you to do✌️✨ Got some dbz and some non-dbz choices. Some of them have a few more pictures in their tags, but not all. I don't care if my gift is written or drawn🦑 And, particularly if you're writing, feel free to include your own oc in whatever's going on, if it helps you get things rolling or whatever. I feel like y'all have the harder job😂💙

---

Cam

He/Him, 5'5", gay ace

Cam's babie c: Well, kinda lol. He grew up in an orphanage and spent a few years homeless, on the street. Nowadays, after carving out a place for himself through a series of turf wars, he's the gang boss of his city's second most prominent gang. He lives in a motel he owns and runs, which is his primary source of income. He's outgoing and friendly, despite the violent side of him and treats his gang members like family. He doesn't much like death, since he's seen so much of it, but views it as a necessary evil, depending on the circumstance. Basically you're all good and taken care of if you're on his good side, but probs in hot shit if you're on his bad side. He doesn't like spending time alone. He would rather sit in silence with someone else than be alone in a room. He's been able to come to terms with things like being alone to go to sleep and such, but if he's ever forced into isolation, it gives him mad anxiety, dude. He refuses to spend more than $20 on anything and much prefers thrift stores and shoplifting😂 He's more okay paying for things at family owned establishments, but he doesn't like to give big companies money lmao. He really loves listening to people play music live, especially if it's jazz music. And just, ,, has to dance😤👏👏👏 He absolutely loves animals and is always setting out water and extra food for the strays. He's named the ones he sees regularly and is working on getting little shelters built for them😭💙🐶🐱✨ He also will bury any dead strays and roadkill that he finds. He feels like they deserve that much.

Likes: His gang members, jazz, PURPLE!! and pink!!, sleeveless shirts and jackets, thrifting, ANIMALS😭💙, gaudy ass decorations😂, gaudy ass anything tbh, pasta, his rainbow steletto switchblade😗💙✨

Dislikes: Being alone, "gross yellows", authority figures, rich people, beING ALONE, spending money😪💸, hot days, seeing people struggle, drugs, BEING ALONE

---

Gale

He/Him, 6'10", pan

Asshole. Asshole man. Will kick your ass np and can be a bit of a bully to those he perceives as being weak. He's not afraid to voice his opinion, not really caring about what other people think of him, and takes an instant disliking to people who are snobby or authority figures. He tends to be quick-tempered and closed off to others, but to those he cares about he's fiercely protective and loyal. He will kill for those few, special people and really only feels truly at ease with those people. He has trouble processing and expressing his emotions a lot of the time, especially more complex ones, which can lead to him just defaulting into a grumpy state. He doesn't really have any true hobbies because he was never able to healthily explore those types of things, so he usually just relaxes in his free time, which is fine with him because he tends to stress😂 Though, he is a bit of an adrenaline junkie and won't say no to going out and doing stupid things just for the sake of doing them😂👏✨ He has an absolutely massive, and also ever-growing, candle collection. He doesn't like to turn down buying new ones when he sees them, so it's resulted in every flat surface in his home being covered with candles. No, he doesn't think it's weird and no, he doesn't think that's too many candles. Aaaand though he hates cleaning, he can't stand for things to be messy or untidy because it gives him massive anxiety, so everything is always put away and clean 😤

Likes: CANDLES!!! (it's not a 'like' it's an obsession), alcohol, everything to be clean, blue and yellow, just... relaxing, horror movies, cold weather, attention, just about any kind of attention, making memories via doing stupid shit😂

Dislikes: People with an holier-than-thou attitude, jewelry, CLUTTER AND MESSES, bright ass lime green, horses (those bitches scary), people who are mean to kids (they get an extra ass kicking (ง'̀-'́)ง )

---

Isa

She/Her, 5', straight

My spunky gal! My little firecracker! She’s super outgoing, sweet, and friendly. In fact, she likes to be friends with everyone. Tends to go after the loner type people for friends though bc she thinks they need the love lol. And she’s got lots of love and support to give them. She’s the type of person that’s always there for anyone who’s going through a rough patch, trying to help them find a solution to the problem. She’s not very good at recognizing that someone doesn’t want her help though lmao. She thinks that everyone can be good under the right circumstances and surrounded by the right people. She likes to just let loose and have fun. She’s usually very carefree, silly, and up for trying new things. She’s also pretty damn hyper though lmao. She’s constantly a walking bundle of energy and excitement. Because of this, a lot of people just, ,, can't handle to be around her very long. It's definitely... a lot😂💙 And as nice as she is, she’s a feisty little shit and isn’t afraid of anyone. She’s gotten into a couple of fights with people she mmmaaayyybe shouldn't have fought and earned a few scars, but she just thinks they’re cool ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ No one’s gonna step on her and they most definitely aren’t gonna step on her family. She just. Has no fear😂 She's far too optimistic to think that anything irreversibly bad could actually happen. Everything can be fixed 😂👏✨

Likes: Food, lots of food, making new friends (especially if they're grumps or bad people she can annoy into not being bad😂), picnics, going on runs and outside adventures, spending time with family and friends, when everyone gets along, cute babies

Dislikes: Sitting still, doing nothing all day, bitches that come around just to cause trouble, alcohol, overly pessimistic mindsets

---

Klovnie

He/Him, 6'11", pan

STINKY MAN ALERT😂 Him and his twin, Klaunie (Spork's), are assassans. They're suuuper close and wouldn't really... be able to function without the other. Klov certainly couldn't, that's for sure😂 Klaunie pretty much takes care of and watches over him because he has no impulse control and no self-preservation instinct. He's prone to going barreling into situations without knowing much of anything about it. So yeah. The money they get from their job is just an added bonus to him because he very much enjoys his job. A little too much 🤡🤡🤡 Hgbgh. He has a big fascination with taxidermy and may or may not experiment with taxidermy on his victims. Ahem. He has... many people mounted on his walls. It's no big deal, don't worry about it. Oh yeah, and he's also a cannibal kjhkjhgj it's fine👌✨ The whole clown aesthetic comes from his family, who are all a part of a traveling circus. Though, only he and Klaunie are, ,, let's say odd,, , lmao. Which causes some issues. But aside from clowning, taxidermy, and his job, he likes to paint or sculpt in his free time. Though his artworks are, um... pretty abstract lmao. You don't have to understand it, just nod and smile 😂💕✨ Though, if you're genuinely interested, he's always more than happy to explain c: He's also a very good dancer and is always looking to imporove further. Come dance with him👀😂💙✨ He likes stars a lot and always signs things with a star instead of his name⭐️ In his mind, the star symbol is his name and you won't convince him otherwise. He has a big ol' mallet and her name is Tuesday Night Cherrypop Supreme. She's the love of his life and she's a good smash-y girl😂

Likes: Klaunie, Tuesday Night Cherrypop Supreme, finding roadkill, GLITTER! SPARKLES! SEQUINS!, adding a new taxidermy person to his room😂, pudding, sneaking bites of food before it's ready, singing and dancing, smeLLING THINGS, cheesy knock knock jokes!

Dislikes: Being ignored, people being mean to Klaunie, burnt food >:•c , overly plain things, missing a joke, people who refuse to have a good time🤡

[raeofalbion]

ETA - June ‘19 Edition

Wow, I haven't done one of these since last October, wtf me. Anyway. The momentary return of the least appropriately named part of this blog just to give a brief overview of what’s going on. -sad confetti canon-

Blackout - I’m gonna aim for 2 - 3 chapters being posted before July cuz I’ve been really shitty about updating this year and I’m really sorry about that. Given the fic is done and edited and all I really have to do is check formatting and typos and fix last minute changes, it just feels really inexcusable to me that I’ve let myself get so far behind. So I’m gonna try to do a little bit better.

ACoIaS - on hiatus still. As I said at the end of last year, I’m on a slight break from Fable (other than Blackout) to avoid burn out and also just to keep from stagnating so much when I get back to it. But if I’m feeling very Fable-y come November, I’ll probably finish up at least the first part during that NaNo. If not November, then next April’s NaNo. I haven’t lost interest, it’s not abandoned, I still like it and I have the entire fic outlined (and most of the second outlined, as well), I just need to take a little break and eventually write it.

Gothic Horror AU - I’m having a hard time figuring out my conclusion to this which is keeping me from making good progress, but I’m planning on returning to it next month and maybe I’ll make some progress. We’ll see.

Shorts & One Shots - I’ve got a handful of one shots started; can’t really go into detail because I’ve just got so many in progress things that it’d be impractical to list them all here (unless y’all really want a super long list here? Idk, I need to redo my In Progress page so maybe I’ll do that there). But I’ve got the next two of the Numbers fics (Three and Five) started and a few other things I know I’ve talked about (the robot fic, anyone?) so still poking slowly away at those. I’m hoping to get a few done soon.

- The Noir AU (& Other Sherlock Fic Ideas) - I know I mentioned plotting this out, but I wanted to put this to a majority vote: would you like me to prioritise this, or any other bigger Sherlock ideas I’ve mentioned, over the Gothic Horror AU? Because I have a lot of interest in a lot of those ideas, but I’m trying to keep an eye on not doing too much at once. So, quick summaries: * Gothic Horror AU is focused around a case that begins about a month after TEH and also deals with questioning reality, repressed trauma, and possibly actual ghosts. Sheriarty, but the ship’s very much background except where it nudges against the main plot. * Noir AU is very trope heavy, but very much on purpose--a noir retelling of various episodes and ACD’s stories, but Sherlock’s actually aware of what all the tropes are and mean and no one else is (so it can get a little cracky and a little dark, but mainly intended to be fun). Ship tags for Adlock, Sheriarty, and Warstan which will all impact the plots in various ways, though the retellings will, of course, be the focus. * That (Probably Sad) Very Gay Victorian Fae AU...which I’ll just link to here. The only problem with this idea is how much research I’ll have to do. Not for big things, I’ve researched a lot of the big things for other projects and for fun, but for all the little things that will need a lot of looking into. So idk. * Writer AU which is best detailed here. If you’ve read MoI (which I doubt unless I’ve discovered some Sherlock fans who also like Fable?), I’m thinking that level of balance between shippy stuff and plot? But yeah, those are the main big ideas. If anyone has one they’d really like me to prioritise, lemme know cuz it really helps to know what readers are into. <3

Prompts - Not listing for practicality’s sake, but I’m prioritising the most recent ones and making decent, if slow, progress. I’ve also shelved a couple dozen really, really old prompts (like verging on 3 yrs old) that didn’t have ships/characters in the ask. Or that I’ve lost the ask for. Or, worst of all, have characters but don’t have what prompt it’s for added to them (which, LOL, good luck me figuring out which prompt list that’s for 3 years later). It’s actually a really weird relief to shelve those? Feels a little less overwhelming. Still a lot to do, but with time, right?

Some personal stuff below the cut.

I don’t usually do personal stuff on etas, but I figure y’all should know why I’ve been so slow writing lately. I’ve never tried to hide that I’ve got pretty severe depression and BPD on top of that, both of which have been complete assholes lately. Unfortunately, I also get really badly heatsick and my depression is worse in the summer so, now that summer’s happening in full, I’ve been feeling just...bad. Also physically bad in a way that suggests I really need to see a doctor, but, every time I’ve brought up these symptoms to my doctor, he’s shrugged them off, told me to lose weight (and to basically cut my calorie and carb intake down to nearly nothing which...doesn’t work and is a horrible thing to tell someone, so fuck you, doc), and then did nothing. And he seems to be the norm, attitude-wise, for doctors in the area. So I don’t really know what to do that’s practical in my current circumstances. But I’m pissed off it’s affecting things I enjoy and it’s just...ugh. I’m tired. I’m really tired. I want to enjoy my writing and my gaming and all that the way I used to but it just kinda feels hopeless at times. Gotta keep at it, I guess, but fuck if it’s just mentally and emotionally exhausting.

[garrettsiwicki]

The Gandrew Conundrum

Or better named, the post where I talk out of my ass. Okay, so let me preface this by saying I am in no way claiming any of this is true. This is just a point of view my brain has created from what we’ve seen or headcanon’d about Garrett and Andrew. I don’t truly know anything about Garrett, Andrew, or anyone relating to them. This is just my opinion of where I personally see them right now. If you wanna take it seriously, okay. If you wanna take it as a headcanon and have fun with it, okay. It’s all in good fun and not meant to be taken as gospel. If anything just run with it for fanfics or something. :) 

 So anyway, here is my analysis/headcanon/conspiracy/whatever about Gandrew. It’s not all fluff and cuteness, so keep that in mind. I tried to write it as down to earth as possible. Enjoy. ❤️

Garrett. I think his feelings/situation is a bit more straight forward than Andrew’s. Garrett has openly said “if I was a girl, i’d put a ring on it [Andrew]” and has joked about being in love with one of his straight friends before (the friend who made him that bike). So it’s pretty likely he harbors some kind of feelings for his “dear close sweet handsome friend” Andrew, whom he appears to be closer and spend more time with. I think Garrett does have feelings for Andrew, and I think he knows he has feelings for Andrew, but of course Andrew (at least to Garrett’s knowledge) is his “straight guy” friend and obviously you can’t just announce that you, a gay person, have feelings for your “not-gay” friend. Hell, it’s difficult to announce you have feelings for your best friend when you’re in a straight relationship. Adding conflicting sexualities to that makes a whole new layer of confusion. Because of this possibility/fear I think Garrett has resigned himself to accepting that it’ll always be something fantasy, that he shouldn’t allow himself to entertain the thought because it’ll “never happen” and he’s just the “silly” gay friend who fell in love with his straight friend. 
(I’m not calling Garrett silly, it’s not silly at all, but he may think that) I think if Andrew showed interest toward a relationship, if it was totally Andrew’s decision to open up about it and pursue something, then Garrett would have no problem pursuing some kind of relationship. But of course, like I said, Garrett is not ready to start this conversation himself. (Note: When I say Garrett doesn’t fully acknowledge it, i’m not saying Garrett can’t brag on or compliment Andrew. He does those things all the times and we all see how smitten he is, i’m just saying he won’t go to Andrew and verbally tell him “I LIKE YOU ROMANTICALLY” lol) 
 Now for Andrew. 
 Andrew’s feelings are a bit harder for me to pin point, largely due to the fact i’m not 100% sure how to explain what I mean, and also my opinion is known to jump back and forth, but nevertheless i’ll try to make this sensible. 
 (A lot of this explaining has to do with discovering yourself/being closeted/etc so keep that in mind.) I think Andrew identifies as straight, and therefor is assumed straight by those around him, but I also feel like he’s never been dead-set on it. And what I mean by that is, the average straight guy will tell you they have no intentions of ever dating a guy. They’re straight and it’s not their thing. But with Andrew I feel he’s never been super defensive of his heterosexuality. Andrew has never shown signs of hyper-masculinity or really caring about what people perceived him as. Yes, that could purely be due to the fact he’s just a decent and accepting guy, but I feel like there’s a bit more to it. I feel like he doesn’t feel the need to establish his heterosexuality because while he has only dated women, and overall assumes himself as straight, I feel like he’s one of those people who has acknowledged to themselves that they wouldn’t be closed to the idea of dating a guy if one day they had feelings for one. (Note, hypothetically being open to dating someone of the same sex is vastly different than actually dating an entire real person) Now, that being said, many people in the queer community started off with a similar woke mindset of “i’m straight, but if I liked someone of the same sex I wouldn’t be opposed to it” before realizing they were actually queer. Just like many of us were big LGBT+ Ally’s and related to/liked a lot of queer media before realizing we were queer ourselves. It’s sometimes a stepping stone to realizing you’re queer, I guess you could say.
 This is where I think Andrew falls. 
 Andrew is obviously comfortable with the LGBT community, his current friend group appears to be very diverse and heavily queer, and he seems to not be afraid of liking things that may be perceived as feminine or “gay” by the average cishet person. Andrew is at a stage a lot of queer people have been at before, which is being a Super Cool Straight Ally until one day “Oh wait... maybe i’m not just an Ally.”. This is something that can happen when a queer person finds themselves around more queer people and more queer media than before. No, I don’t mean he’s being “turned” gay or some dumb shit like that, what I mean is if a queer person is in a more open and diverse environment (the squad, youtube, etc) that they maybe weren’t in before, that person can start to realize things about themselves they’ve never been able to really acknowledge, label, or be open about before. 
(This is why I smirk at the comments saying “Andrew is getting gayer” because yeah, lol. For lack of a better term, he is. He’s not being made gay, but he is getting more comfortable in himself.)  Andrew is at the stage where he knows something is different. He knows he puts Garrett in a different category than his other male friends, he knows he doesn’t /like/ seeing Garrett flirt with other guys. When Garrett hangs out with Jeffree, Andrew has to post about some other friend he’s hanged out with. If Jeffree makes a joke about sleeping with Garrett, Andrew has to mention he slept over with a friend too. He knows what he’s feeling is jealousy and he’s trying to put this new feeling in it’s place, but he’s still not ready to let himself fully admit that he’s gone and fallen for his best friend. See, Andrew has always struck me as having a shy, maybe a bit nervous, personality. I think it’s definitely possible he overthinks different situations in this life, and falling for your best friend is definitely something someone might overthink. I think it’s also very possible he’s slightly self conscious and tends to doubt himself a lot in stressful or confusing situations. So it’s not that he’s against what he’s feeling, he’s not grossed out by it or negative toward it,  but it’s that he won’t let himself *believe* it’s happening. If that makes sense. I think he panics and tries to rationalize it into something else because “I don’t have feelings for Garrett… do I? No, we’re best friends. That’s all it is.” 
“Garrett couldn’t possibly have feelings for me… there’s no way” 
 “I’m just being dramatic, Garrett doesn’t like me… ” etc. 
 Most everyone, including myself, has had the #gay panic when realizing they’re queer. He’s never experienced this before with a guy, definitely not with someone so close to him, and I think he’s a bit shell shocked by it. So he self doubts. He overthinks. He tries to rationalize it because there *must* be another explanation for it... there’s no WAY he’s fallen for his best friend, that only happens in movies, right? And when I say Andrew can’t admit it or is confused by his feelings, I don’t mean it in a homophobic or demeaning way. I mean coming to terms with yourself, even if it’s just the newness of everything, can be a lot to take in at first. It’s an experience with a lot of feelings and thoughts. Even if someone is open to it, it actually happening can take a minute to get used to. Hypotheticals and real life are two entirely different ball games. 
 Now for another big question…. do they realize each other has the same feelings, and do people around them realize it? 
 Like I said earlier, I think Garrett doesn’t allow himself to believe it’s there. He thinks Andrew is straight and it’s all just his silly feelings, so while he might notice hints here and there he doesn’t let himself believe it’s anything. He won’t assume anything until Andrew tells him directly to his face. (Poor Andrew, lol) 
 For Andrew I think he notices more than Garrett. He can see Garrett likes him a lot and it’s not that he doesn’t want that, but like with his own feelings I think he tries to rationalize it and overthink it. When Garrett compliments him and brags on him, he tries to tell himself that it’s JUST because Garrett is a nice guy. It’s JUST because Garrett is funny and extra. Garrett compliments EVERYONE, I’M not special (he is). Like with his own feelings, in the back of his head he knows what it is and he does hope for it, but it’s gonna take a bit of time for him to let himself believe fully it’s there. 
(may it be due to the #gay panic or just his own self doubt) As for their friends… obviously they notice. Garrett tweeted about wanting a boyfriend once and Matt replied with a tag to Andrew, so obviously anyone could tell they’re the couple in their friend group who everyone teases about getting together. Do I think their friends realize it’s THIS serious yet? Maybe not. Teasing and genuine belief are two different things. I think their friends definitely think they’re good together, and wouldn’t be surprised if it happened, and tease them about it, but like with everything else Andrew’s alleged straightness still adds a tiny bit of hesitation to everyone’s belief. So I think they know, but maybe they don’t notice it’s quite this serious yet. 
 As for the actual squad (Shane, Ryland, and Morgan)… I don’t know. I’ve never been able to exactly pin point my thoughts on their POV. I think they believe more than Garrett and Andrew’s other friends, simply for the fact Shane and Ryland are both queer and could see things from a different POV than Garrett and Andrew’s other straight friends. Not to get too fanfic-y, but I think Shane would definitely be one of the first people to realize “oh shit, this is for real. It’s not just teasing anyone.” (if he hasn’t realized already). 
Shane struggled a lot with his bisexuality and has been through this before, he would definitely be someone to notice the tell tale signs somebody else might not. - Anyway, there ya go. As of right now, this is my view of everything Gandrew. May it drastically change one day? Yes. Does it change a little bit everyday depending on the circumstance and new content? Yes. So again, take from this what you will. It may ring some truth, it may be entirely bs. But hopefully you all at least enjoyed reading it. :)