#actually when am i not feeling unwell lmao

[tincta-aurum]

some silly doodles because i've been feeling Unwell

[kimmkitsuragi]

if i dont see my friends tomorrow i will literally die

[polzkadotz]

.

[boogiewoogieweeb]

#also if you’re like me (insane) and also see edward as left handed the implications of the left hand bleeding #ned little holding his hand out in school as the school teacher switches a cane against it #trying to make him learn a pattern that’s unnatural to him #[in an insane voice] actually the fact that edward’s left hand is his most visible sign of illness is intentional and incredibly meaningful!

@maedhrus helen, don't you dare hide these additions in the tags!

thinking again about the edward little death vision of his father comforting him after a dog bite. thinking about how his left hand is the one bandaged. edward little who once held his hand out to an animal that betrayed the trust he showed it, his wound reopening as once again his empathy is exploited

[inkykeiji]

a thousand little fire ants crawling all over my scalp

[piastri-fvx]

The Night We Met. Ollie Bearman.

Pairing: Ollie Bearman x girlfriend! reader

Summary: When everyone freaks out about the way Ollie talks about his girlfriend in interviews.

Word Count:

Face claim: girls from pinterest!!

Disclaimer/s: None!! just fluff!

A/N: first ollie fic because i'm trying to do more different drivers (i support most of the drivers, lmao) hope u enjoy!! let me know if you have requests or want to be on my permanent tag list <333

✮⋆˙ Masterlist. ˙⋆✮

------------------------------------------------------

@f1

liked by olliebearman, yourusername, flavy.barla, lando, dinobeganovic_ and 8.284.936 others

f1 ollie bearman upon being asked about his girlfriend in an interview at the Saudi Arabian grand prix: "When I saw her for the first time, all of my focus went out the window. To me, everyone else was just a blur and my heart started beating so fast I thought my chest was going to explode. It felt like time froze just so I could look at her. And when she looked at me, my brain went on a hiatus. She was so pretty she literally broke my brain,"

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user1 oh he is in LOVE

user2 where do you even find a guy like this oml 😭

-> user3 we need his girlfriend's secret to getting a guy like ollie

-> user4 realll 😭

user5 THIS IS ADORABLE I'M GONNA DIEEE

-> user6 you can literally see it in his eyes 😭💕

user7 eyes don't lie 🤷‍♀️

dinobeganovic_ he also speaks about her like that in private btw, in case anyone was wondering 😁 liked by author

-> user8 NOT DINO OUTING OLLIE

-> user9 LMAOOOOOO

-> user10 CLOCK IT

user11 not the official f1 account posting this omfg 😭

-> user12 they knew we'd eat this up 😣

-> user13 and we still are eating this up

user14 I died dead, everyone needs an Ollie in their life 😭

-> user15 fr because how is he so sweet

user16 making ollie edits as i'm typing this 🙏

user17 i watched the interview and when i tell you, the way this man's face lit up the SECOND his girlfriend was mentioned omfg 😣

-> user18 I AM UNWELL

-> user19 gonna pray for a boyfriend like him

@olliebearman

liked by yourusername, arthur_leclerc, alexandrasaintmleux, charles_leclerc, kimi.antonelli and 582.937 others

olliebearman happy birthday to the prettiest ❤️

tagged: @yourusername

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yourusername thank you, my love 🥰 liked by author

-> olliebearman you're soooo welcome, my darling ❤️

-> user1 i'm gonna die

-> user2 i fear i live for this content 😣

user3 okay but can we talk about how perfect you guys look together?

-> user4 fr because how is it that they look like they've just always been together like this 😭

-> user5 real 🙏

user6 face cards never decline 😝

alexandrasaintmleux happy birthday, y/n!! liked by author

-> yourusername tyyyyy 💗 liked by author

charles_leclerc very happy that she's my daughter-in-law 😁 liked by creator

-> user7 NOT HIM BRINGING UP THE FAMILY JOKES

-> user8 HELPPPP

-> user9 "f1 is a serious sport." f1:

user10 imagine being this photogenic AND dating oliver bearman 😭

-> user11 sounds too good to be true 🙏

-> user12 i'm not even sure who's luckier, y/n or ollie

user13 cutest thing i've seen this year 💗

user14 it should literally be illegal to be this perfect

-> user15 real 😭🙏

-> user16 they're both perfect and somehow also perfect together

-> user17 fr because like ughhhh i want this soooo bad

@yourusername

liked by olliebearman, alexandrasaintmleux, flavy.barla, arthur_leclerc, lando and 382.826 others

yourusername london with my london boy ❤️

tagged: @olliebearman

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user1 y/n woke up and chose to make us feel even more single 😭🙏

alexandrasaintmleux trop belle 🥰🥰🥰 liked by author

-> yourusername i'm gonna kiss you

-> olliebearman no, you won't. 😁

-> user2 GUYS HE PUT A FULL STOP.

-> user3 HE DID

-> user4 HE IS SERIOUS OML

-> user5 ollie 💀

-> user6 ollie got replaced lol

user7 straight out of a novel fr

user8 no one talk to me rn

-> user9 just me actually giggling at this post

user10 still processing that people this perfect actually exist tbh

-> user11 story of my life, ngl

-> user12 i'm so jealous rn

user13 alexa, play 'that should be me' by justin bieber 😣😣😣

-> user14 i felt that on another level

olliebearman I LOVE YOUUUUU 😍 liked by author

-> user15 he's so down bad lmao

-> user16 more like down HORRENDOUS lol

user17 just me and my single ass staring at these pictures likeeee...

-> user18 i relate to this even though i don't want to

-> user19 i wish i didn't relate to this lmfao

user20 real life definition of couple goals

-> user21 literally was just about to comment that

-> user22 lollll me too

-> user23 they are literally THE standard

@haasf1team

liked by olliebearman, yourusername, formula2, kimi.antonelli, ferraridriveracademy and 347.836 others

haasf1team Ollie's on the grid for '25 🙌🇬🇧

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yourusername proudest girlfriend right now ❤️ liked by author

-> haasf1team our favorite fan ❤️

-> yourusername WOOOOO!! GO HAAS!!! liked by author

user1 el mago del motor 😫

-> user2 mola mas que ocon 😭😭😭

-> user3 the way that song has aged sooo well

-> user4 real

-> user5 and not only because ollie's gonna be an f1 driver, but also because his new teammate is gonna be ocon lmao 💀

teamob PROUD! 🔥🙌 liked by author

-> user6 soooo proud

f1dutchgp 🔥🔥 liked by author

user7 GUYS WE'RE ABOUT TO GET MORE OLLIE CONTENT

-> user8 YAYYYYYYYY

user9 y/n is now an f1 wag 🙏

-> user10 my new favorite f1 wag already

-> user11 same tbh, even though the others seem cool too

-> user12 yeah but ollie and y/n are a different level of perfect lol

user13 y/n representing all of us

user14 YAYYYYYYY

-> user15 GET IT OLLIEEEEE

user16 bet they just gained so many followers lmao

-> user17 yeah because we all love ollie

-> user18 he's our golden boy

user19 he's cute (i'm a straight guy)

-> user20 yup (also a straight guy)

@olliebearman

liked by yourusername, lando, alexandrasaintmleux, kimi.antonelli, f1haasteam and 793.946 others

olliebearman officially a couple account from now on ☺️

tagged: @yourusername

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user1 do they just wake up every day and decide to be the cutest couple ever or does it happen naturally?

-> olliebearman she's already the cutest, that makes it easier for us 😁

-> yourusername I LOVE YOUUUUU 😭❤️ liked by author

-> user2 he's so cheesy 😫

-> user3 and she's eating it up 😭💗

-> user4 we all are tbh 🙂‍↔️

-> user5 the way he's literally such a sweetheart 😣

user6 I FULLY SUPPORT THIS DECISION 🙏🙏🙏

-> user7 SAME

user8 CUTIESSSSS

user9 HE BETTER BE SERIOUS

-> user10 i hope he is 😣

-> user11 i fear i need the couple content

user12 ollie's smile when he's with lily>>>>>>everything else

-> user13 fr because he looks the happiest when he's with her

-> user14 bro looks like he's in heaven with her

user15 like every time he smiles in an interview, i KNOW she's the reason. prove me wrong... you can't

-> user16 LITERALLY 🙏

-> user17 everyone who disagrees shall argue with the wall

-> user18 walls are smarter than people who think they can prove you wrong, pookie

@yourusername

liked by olliebearman, haasf1team, estebanocon, flavy.barla, alexandrasaintmleux and 449.057 others

yourusername in my aesthetic era 🥰

tagged: @olliebearman

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user1 this is EVERYTHING

-> user2 YES BECAUSE HOW IS THIS SO PERFECT

-> user3 THEY ARE LITERALLY COUPLE GOALS AHHHHH

user4 THE SMILES. THE ENERGY. THE CHEMISTRY.

user5 literally sobbing at how cute this is

-> user6 real because how can two people be this adorable together 😭

-> user7 i hope they never break up 🙏😣

user8 THIS or nothing

-> user9 this is a NEED

-> user10 YES i NEED a relationship like theirs

dinobeganovic_ i'm giving a speech at the wedding 😁😁😁 liked by author

-> user11 dino being the biggest olly/n shipper 🙏😩

-> user12 my roman empire, everyone

-> user13 this is my new favorite thing 😣

user14 outfits are eatingggg liked by author

olliebearman do you do weddings? (as the bride) liked by author

-> yourusername with you? (as the groom) definitely.

-> olliebearman deal. liked by author

-> yourusername i love youuuuuuu

-> olliebearman say it again liked by author

-> yourusername i love youuuu.

-> olliebearman yeah, you do. 😁 liked by author

user15 i'm gonna die.

-> user16 CAN WE TALK ABOUT HIS COMMENT

-> user17 YEAH LIKE OML

-> user18 AND HER ANSWER 🙏😣

-> user19 AND THE REPLIES AND OMG

-> user20 YEAH ALL OF THEIR TALK OMFG

-> user21 AND THEY'RE SO DOWN BAD FOR EACH OTHER

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A/N: OMG I'M FINALLY BACK GUYS 😭 I was on a week trip and didn't have my phone and them just like DID NOT have any time at all, so I just had this story unfinished with only a little missing. Lol, anyways, I finally finished this and I hope u enjoyedddd!!

tags!

@freyathehuntress

[bellysoupset]

I'm going to ask again since we haven't seen sick Leo in a while. How about, he and Jonah are at some sort of wedding vendor convention/show for engaged couples (these really do exist in the US), and all the caterers have samples for people to taste and they're having a great time until Leo realizes one of the cakes they tasted came from the bakery that supplied his work birthday cake that made him and Jon so sick. So then he's freaking out/whiny/being adorably Leo that he's absolutely going to get sick and Jonah's a fucking doctor and can't he do something (I'm thinking Leo going way overdramatic and asking for his stomach to be pumped or something) and Jonah keeps rolling his eyes and telling him that he's fine.

And then later Leo does start feeling sick but at first Jonah doesn't believe him but then he pukes and he's like "I told you so" but Jonah doesn't so it turns out either than he got food poisoning from one of the appetizers he sampled that Jon didn't (like, it had an ingredient he didn't like or Leo just at a fuckton of them and Jonah only had a bite), or else he got the Vince/Lucas plague somehow.

Is that detailed enough lol? I just want Leo and Jon cute bitching at each other please. And then Jon caretaking when he realize that yes, Leo is actually unwell.

But hey, no pressure.

No pressure lmao. I tried to type this one as fast as I could, so maybe it can get a part 2? Not sure!

-------

"I won't preteeend, that I won't miss thiiiis," Leo squealed, hand in hand with Jon and all but skipping, "But Portland, Maine, I don't know where that iiiis."

Jonah let out a snort as his fiancé sang the chorus again, "do you only know this part of the song?" he grinned and Leo waved him off.

"And you can go ahead and hate me, that's just fine," he sang smugly, "It doesn't matter either way, I'm right. Portland, Maiiiine-"

Jonah rolled his eyes as the off-key singing continued, pulling Leo closer by their clasped hands and shutting him up with a kiss, "you're silly."

"Yeah, but you love me," the blonde chuckled, kissing him back and then moving so he could press a kiss to Jonah's shoulder, keeping them closer as they continued to walk through the conference center in Portland.

They had gotten to the town at 8 AM, but regardless of the early hour, the event was packed. Each vendor had its own stand and they were organized in several rows, by different categories.

Jonah wasn't particularly thrilled, he felt that this was the type of place couples went to get discounted prices and he had no desire to bargain on his wedding, he wanted the best, no matter the cost. Nevertheless, Leo was beaming. He loved any type of sales, but most importantly, he clearly loved being involved in the planning.

It was 10:30 AM by now and Jon's stomach was starting to rumble with hunger. Leo clearly probably didn't share this feeling, since he had been trying every single food sample that the many stands kept offering him.

"Okay, so we're set on the black invitations?" Jonah reached for the iPad in his bag, looking at the itemized list Wendy had helped him put together. She was an amazing party organizer and he the harder part of asking for her help on anything was to get her to stop.

"Only if you agree on the different lining," Leo rested his chin on Jon's shoulder, "I really liked the one that was a photoshoot."

"I thought those were pretty as well," Jonah turned his head just in time to plant a kiss on the tip of Leo's nose, causing his boyfriend to scrunch it adorably, "this means we need to find two different photographers, one for the wedding, one for the photoshoot-"

"Could be the same one," Leo shrugged, tugging him towards a table, "oh try this-" he said, eyeing the fancy chocolate truffles. Jonah eye rolled at him.

"No, it's going to spoil my appetite," he scoffed, going through their list, "I wanna get a look at the venue representatives here-"

"Okay, okay, okay..."

Two hours later and Jonah was feeling extremely proud of himself. He had connected with several vendors and booked two different venue tours, besides they had matched well with several photographers and stylists-

His stomach let out a grumble, loud enough that Leo heard and raised his eyebrows, even in the crowded space, "that was your tummy?"

Jonah's cheeks burned and he looked away, crossing his arms, "I'm starving-"

"The cafeteria closed thirty minutes ago," Leo sighed, already pulling out his phone to search for a restaurant. Jonah shifted, he was really hungry, he had been so focused on the task at hand that he hadn't really thought about eating.

"Here," Jon stepped forward and grabbed some shrimp canapes from one of the stands, taking their card as well, although that was just for show, "have some-" his cheeks were burning from the embarrassment of it all, but there was no other immediate option and his insides were hurting.

Jonah ate his two canapes and Leo took one, munching on it without looking up from his phone, "alright, there's a restaurant about thirty minutes away from here on foot," he said, licking his thumb, "doesn't seem fancy, but if you're really hungry-"

"I'm starving," Jonah nodded, tagging along with him, "I was dumb."

Leo snorted at that, rolling his eyes as he ate his second shrimp canape, "nothing new ther- What's that?"

"What?" Jonah glanced down at his body, since Leo was glaring at him, "what is it?"

"In your hand?"

"Oh, just the card of the shrimp canapes. They're really good, by the way, though I might just be starv-" Jonah's voice faded as Leo snatched the card from his hand and then let out a loud groan.

"JON!" He whined, loud enough that some people looked their way, "Jon, that's Culinary Chic's card!"

He simply blinked at his boyfriend, confused, "should I know them...?"

"YES! These are the pricks who poisoned us on my birthday! The ones who did the cupcakes!" Leo's face paled and he let out a queasy groan, "oh my god, I'm gonna be sick."

Jonah rolled his eyes at his histrionics, "you had two little canapes, baby. Besides, it's not a very original name, it's probably a different cate-"

"Nope," Leo whined, continuing to walk, hunched over as if his stomach was hurting even though Jon was fairly sure it was down right impossible for him to be feeling sick 30 seconds after swallowing his food, "I'd know their logo anywhere, the office sued them- See! It says on the back that they're from Welton!"

Jonah cringed, "well, that's not ideal," he agreed, "but I feel fine. I'm sure you're just being dramatic-"

"Can you get it out of me?" Leo asked, just as they stepped outside the conference center. It was windy outside and Jonah shivered, while his fiancé collapsed dramatically on one of the benches on the sidewalk, "please? If we go to a hospital, can you do your mojo, get my stomach pumped-"

"Leo," Jonah cackled, standing in front of him and messing Leo's hair, "don't be ridiculous, I couldn't do that even if I believed you're actually feeling sick, which I don't."

"Do you hate me?" Leo's voice came out muffled as he leaned forward, pressing his forehead to Jon's tummy and wrapping both arms around his stomach, "I can feel it churning inside of me."

Jon let out a scoff, patting his back, "there, there. Can you get up? I'm really hungry, Leo. Starting to feel woozy from hunger, really."

Leo got up, pouting the entire time and moved away as Jonah tried to take his hand, "no, don't talk with me, you don't believe me," he squeezed his eyes as if he felt a cramp, "that fucking place poisoned me, again, and you won't even do anything about it."

Jonah glared at the side of his head, continuing to walk. He wasn't kidding about feeling woozy, while Leo had snacked all day on samples, Jon hadn't eaten since the day before.

"Okay, Leo, whatever," he snapped, feeling a little sting of annoyance. Couldn't his boyfriend save the scene for later, when Jonah wasn't about to collapse from hunger?

The rest of the walk was quiet. Jonah was feeling genuinely dizzy and Leo seemingly had gotten offended, so he was walking next to him with his arms wrapped around his belly and glaring at the ground.

"Is this the place?" Jon asked, as they stopped at a little rundown tiny restaurant. It was definitely not fancy, but it'd do. The smell of the food was amazing.

Leo nodded, not looking at him, "uh-hum."

With a tired huff, Jonah walked ahead and inside the place. Leo followed him without a word.

He ordered the first thing his eyes latched on, as well as a coke, then turned expectantly to Leo, "what do you want?"

"Nothing," Leo shook his head, with a grimace, "a water."

"You're not going to be sick," Jonah sighed as soon as the waiter was gone, rubbing his temples, before reaching over the table to squeeze Leo's wrist, "I ate the same as you, baby, I'm not sick."

"Well, I'm sick of your voice, so clam up," Leo bit back, squinting at him, "if you won't believe me, then don't talk with me. My stomach hurts."

Jonah rolled his eyes, grimacing as his own belly cramped, although in his case it was because of hunger, "alright, shutting up," he pulled out his phone in order to avoid looking at Leo.

They sat there in deadly silence for fifteen minutes, until finally the waiter came over with his order. Leo reached for his water bottle immediately, while Jonah barely had enough time to thank the waiter before he was munching on the food as fast as he could.

It was rare that he allowed himself to be this impolite, but truly he was starting to see some colorful dots in front of his eyes.

Jonah was so focused and famished, that it was only when he was halfway through his meal that he slowed down and let out a relieved sigh, lowering his fork and knife, "are you sure you don't wanna order something? It's actually really good-"

"No," Leo had lowered his forehead to the table, "I think I'm gonna throw up."

"Because of one measly shrimp canapé?" Jonah teased him, still not buying it, "doubt it."

It was the wrong thing to say, because Leo straightened up in his seat, pressing his hand to his lips and swallowing convulsively, "please, stop talking about food..." his voice was weaker now and Jon frowned.

"Are you actually sick?"

Instead of answering him, as soon as Leo lowered his hand, a sick belch rolled past his lips. His whole face turned red and he let out a whine, lowering his head in shame, "I'm sorry, excuse me-"

Jonah frowned, "Leo?"

His fiancé fidgeted, then shot up from his seat, cradling his stomach, "I- I'll be right back..." he grumbled in a thick, distorted voice, before shooting away in the direction of the bathrooms.

Jonah grimaced in sympathy, but still didn't get up. If Leo was sick, then he had a very long day ahead of him. And, in truth, Jon still wasn't fully convinced Leo hadn't talked himself into feeling queasy or upset his stomach with all the samples he had eaten.

He finished his meal, then drummed his fingers against the table, unnerved by Leo not returning. Jonah counted five more minutes, before fishing out his phone once again.

"Wow, so fucking worried over my wellbeing, you dickhead," Leo scoffed, as soon as he came back to the table, collapsing on his seat. Jonah rolled his eyes, lifting up his head and turning the phone around.

"I was getting us a hotel room, you prick," he glared at Leo, "clearly you're in no shape for us to drive back to Welton."

Leo's eyes widened, adorably, as he glanced from the screen with the booked room, then back to Jonah, then they welled up in tears, "Ah... I'm sorry-"

"What- No! Nononono-" Jonah leaped from his seat, so he could crouch down in front of Leo's, "no, baby, don't cry. That's alright, I didn't believe you, I was a dick-"

"You booked us a hotel room..." Leo sniffled, rubbing angrily the microtears glued to his lashes, "and I was a jerk and I feel so-so horrible-"

"I know, I know," Jonah cooed, biting down an amused smile at the over the top reaction. He reached in, cupping Leo's cheeks and wasn't even a little bit surprised as heat met his hands, "you're running a fever, love. Did you end up throwing up?"

"No," Leo shook his head, curling up and lowering his forehead to Jonah's shoulder, "other end," his voice came out muffled and from the corner of his eye Jon could see his cheeks turning red.

He let out a sympathetic noise, "that sucks. Do you think you can handle the walk back to our car in the conference center or you'd rather we just took a taxi straight to the hotel?"

Leo let out a whimper and his answer was entirely swallowed as he ducked his head and muffled a burp in his hand.

"Leo?"

"Taxi," his face had turned the color of spoiled milk, "I really don't feel well, Jon..."

"I know, darling, I think you caught some bug," Jonah stroked his cheek, ignoring the confused looks from the other patrons in the restaurant and clicking around on his phone to call them a ride.

"Go wait outside, I'll get you a bag," Jon instructed, pulling Leo up a minute later, "go, baby-"

The tip of Leo's nose was still red and he looked every little bit like puss in boots, making it very hard for Jon to keep a straight face. Still, the blonde walked out, while Jonah went to the cashier to get the bill and ask for a plastic bag, as well as a new water bottle.

As soon as he made it outside, though, he realized he too late. Leo had had the decency of not throwing up right in front of the restaurant, he was by the end of the street, but braced against a street lamp and projectile vomiting in the gutter.

Jon's stomach clenched and he tried, really hard, not to gag. It took all the love in him to walk closer and plant a hand on Leo's back, squeezing his shoulder in a reassuring manner.

There was absolutely no chance in hell he could even afford to glance at the mess, after having just eaten, so Jonah opted for only standing there and checking their ride in the app, making sure Leo wasn't about to collapse down.

After what felt like an eternity, but his phone told him was exactly six minutes, Leo coughed and spat, letting out a groan, "what the fuck was this..." his words were sticking together and he stumbled back, before leaning against Jon's side, "god..."

"Very impressive," Jonah mumbled, gulping down his own gag and breathing slowly through his mouth, "take a sip, baby-" he pushed the water bottle in Leo's shaky hands, "a small one."

Leo took the smallest sip he could, before wrapping a hand around his belly and grimacing, "it's churning like hell... How long for the taxi?"

"Two minutes," Jonah combed his fingers through Leo's sweaty hair, guiding him slowly away from the disgusting mess, "I'll rub your tummy for as long as you want, as soon as we're in the room."

"Uhm," Leo pressed a fist to his mouth, muffling a wet burp and moved back to the street in order to spit out a mouthful of frothy saliva, "remember you said that."

[gaiaxygang]

rereading ena3 because i'm unwell

(condensed for character limit)

first, i am very proud of ena for facing this assignment head on and instead of giving up or trying against next time, decides to bring it home and try again.

putting the rest under the cut because this got HORRENDOUSLY long lmao i just love this story so much.

to my pit babe mutuals..... this is the story focused on the pair i mean when i say Omg This Reminds Me Of KentaWay. the direct cause of my 50k++ pit babe wordcount on ao3 even. they are very important to me!!!

something to be said about ena drawing herself first before eventually basing her artwork off mafuyu instead... very gay. and also another thing that points to them not being so different after all (which is the realisation ena comes to at the end of this story).

ena hates asahina mama so much i think it's cute. this is so telling of ena's hotheaded approach to things and her not really understanding mafuyu's circumstances. mafuyu can't just tell her mom when she's unhappy with something.

mafuyu changes the topic to the new demo and ena is so frustrated and rightfully so. that's what ena's kindness is like. she knows it can be hard, but she just does not understand why mafuyu would keep quiet even when she is clearly suffering. and she is frustrated for mafuyu too.

when ena sees that mafuyu would rather get drenched in the rain than go home because when i go home, it feels a little cold, and it's painful, ena drags her to her home. ena gives mafuyu shelter from the literal rain, as well as a warm place to stay away from the metaphorical storm. and in true ena fashion, she expresses this with an angry face.

mafuyu's arc is covered with rain imagery (no, ena is not the Rain Imagery Character even though watashi wa ame is her song. it has always been the key symbolism in mafuyu's arc) and this is the start of it!

if you get sick like this, i'll sorta feel bad!

this is when it clicks for ena, i think. because ena's dream of becoming as an artist has been rejected by shinei before. 2 years later, she still remember how much it hurt, and how it haunts her to this day.

but ena doesn't understand keeping quiet in order to prevent rejection. why would she? when her family always speaks their mind, even when it hurts others. when shinei, despite his good intentions, crushed her heart by saying what he believed in without any tact or context. when he talked to her like a fellow artist rather than his daughter, even though what ena needed was the support of a parent.

this is only mentioned later on but one thing i find interesting is that this story takes place while shinei is out overnight for work. shinonome mama, ena and akito are all on good, bickering terms. however ena does not talk to shinei at all and avoids him as much as he can. i imagine the dinner scene later in this story would be quite different if he was there lol.

ena: that... i might be able to understand that, a little.

geh. ena is so frustrated seeing mafuyu fall deeper and deeper into that cycle her and niigo have been trying to get her out of.

which is why ena takes the phone from mafuyu, puts on a cheerful, polite front, and lies to asahina mama. her act here reminds me a bit of mafuyu's fake smile honestly. she hates associating herself with shinei but she knows asahina mama is the type of person who would fall for it, so she uses it to her advantage, to help mafuyu. and it works!

(it pisses me off to use his name, but...) yes, he's shinonome shinei... do you know him?

gah, the dinner scene... ena giving all her carrots to mafuyu is so cute. akito thinking mafuyu must take care of ena a lot when it's actually the other way around is so cute. mafuyu meeting the in-laws (who adore her) is so cute. everything about this scene is so cute.

shinonome mama can understand asahina mama's feelings, because she can get worried about ena the same way. for a second mafuyu thinks that her mom truly is just worried about her, but...

the difference between shinonome mama and asahina mama is that shinonome mama unconditionally supports ena. she isn't perfect (she seems to be unaware of just how hurt ena was by her fight with shinei, but tries her best to support ena when she sees ena shutting herself away) but just by being supportive she is already so much better than asahina mama, who wants mafuyu to discard the only thing that makes her happy in order to become what asahina mama wants, and invades mafuyu's privacy.

asahina mama always phrases it in such a way that seems genuine, but mafuyu can feel something different when she hears shinonome mama say this. when she watches ena and akito bicker, she notes that even though they're arguing, there's a warmth at the dinner table that is absent from her own.

(it shouldn't be any different from my house, but something is different. but... what is it?)

and here comes the confession: mafuyu has voiced out her opinion before, like ena wants her to, but it didn't work. asahina mama, again, does not listen to mafuyu.

i told my mom that i wanted to do music, but she told me... "make sure you don't regret it in the future". i'm sure she's worried about me, so i...

mafuyu's if i be patient now and study for my exams, when i become a university student, i might be able to do music again breaks my heart because even if asahina mama really did allow and encourage mafuyu to do music after getting into medical school, it doesn't change that mafuyu will be unhappy.

because mafuyu doesn't want to be a doctor, like asahina mama wants. she wants to be a nurse, and that's been her dream since she was young. if she obeys her mother and goes into medicine, it'll be hard to back out. that is not where her happiness lies.

and either way, i'm not sure if mafuyu would have been able to endure another year under her mother's control if she quit music. she's barely holding it together as it is (both before she was open with niigo and now when they're all working to help her). music is her only escape, her only outlet and happiness. not only that, it's something she does with her precious friends. without that, ena knows, mafuyu would only go back to being who she was in main story. that girl who had given up on wanting to be saved and now only wishes to disappear.

i draw because i want to, because i want to believe my happiness lies beyond that. ...(i don't understand. i know your parents are important, but why won't you face what you want to do?)

ena finds her happiness in art. even though art is also a source of her pain, she continues drawing because that is where her happiness lies. she knows that mafuyu, too, has something she wants to do. something that her mother is trying to dissuade her from. and mafuyu simply gives in, not even fully realising how she is only sinking deeper into despair.

being told "it's for your sake", having your parents' thoughts pushed onto you- would i have also... turned out like mafuyu?

this. this is the part of wish that shows exactly how far ena and mafuyu's relationship has come since main story. back then, ena couldn't understand mafuyu's feelings: mafuyu is admired, talented, and has expectations placed upon her. ena has none of these, so she can't comprehend why mafuyu would want to disappear like she does.

but here, she starts to understand the pain that was driving mafuyu back then, the same pain mafuyu will be in if ena doesn't do something now.

in ena's side story, she thinks about this a little more. she comes to the conclusion that she if it were her, because she is stubborn, she would've kept drawing even if shinei told her to quit. that's another key difference between the two! ena is rebellious and strong-willed and even though it'd hurt her, she would never stop trying to pursue her happiness. she even acknowledges that despite the hurt shinei's words caused, he never told her outright to stop drawing. i would argue it was implied and hurt as much as if he did but ena4 doesn't seem to agree with me... i don't like that story anyways.

ena is so happy when mafuyu finally admits that what she truly wants, disregarding her parents' wishes, is to keep creating music with niigo. look at how soft she is! it makes her so happy to hear that this truly is something mafuyu wants to do, and that she's able to say it out loud.

in that case, i'll help too. as a niigo member. first, as practice, why don't you go all out and do what you want for today, at least?

this expression!!! mafuyu is so into her lyric writing because even though she doesn't fully know it, this is what she loves. this is what she is happiest doing: creating songs with her friends. even ena is shocked that mafuyu can make such a face.

again, ena starts to understand mafuyu more. expressing her true feelings and desires like that IS a huge step for mafuyu, even if she's only expressing them to ena, who... already knows this.

i was just thinking, that creating music is important to you.

look at my baby. so much determination in her eyes. she has learned so much from her girlfriend.

and that, that is the face ena wants to draw. those are the feelings she wants to convey in her assignment, "hatching". mafuyu working seriously on what she wants to do, not unlike ena herself. mafuyu helps her draw feelings she wasn't able to previously, simply by being herself.

(...so mafuyu can make that sort of expression. even though i thought she would make a bored face no matter what she does. it's just as i thought - what she said earlier, "i want to create music with everyone", might be related to it. it's not because someone told her to. it's because mafuyu herself thought that she wants to.)

so that's how ena sees me...

that, my dear mafuyu, is homosexuality. you are gay. for ena.

again, ena's expression is just so Soft. moment of appreciation for enamafu.

AND MAFUYU TOO!!!! this exchange of looks makes me feel like i need to be sedated good fucking lord THERE'S SO MUCH LOVE IN THOSE GAZES. mafuyu's heart feels warm because ena has been able to help her confront these feelings of hers and give her temporary peace at a low moment, and ena, kindhearted ena, is glad she's able to help mafuyu.

ena doesn't know if she's right in how she sees mafuyu, but she tries her best to capture mafuyu's willpower. in hopes that one day, mafuyu will break out of her shell with her own strength, hatching into the vast world, as someone who is more like asahina mafuyu.

[thrashkink-coven]

ok ok ok ok ok

I’ve been wanting to talk ab Arcane for a minute because I just binged it all last week

omg

niche post for both the demonolatry scene and fans of arcane lmao

ok first and foremost let me say that I do completely think that Jinx and Silco’s relationship is toxic, even if not abusive. Silco isolates a child, manipulates her into doing his bidding, puts a gun in her hand when she is clearly unwell etc. Not healthy, not good, even if it is loving. And borderline predatory (although I really like to give Silco the benefit of the doubt and assume that he wasn’t sexually interested in Jinx in any way). He definitely groomed her even if it wasn’t sexual. This is a fact.

Please please do not think that I am romanticizing this relationship or saying it was good. it wasn’t. Shipping Jinx and Silco is weird as fuck. The writing was fucking immaculate and I absolutely love their dynamic (beautiful, tragic as fuck) but that doesn’t make it morally right and we definitely should not encourage it.

ok, glad we got that out of the way.

While watching this, omfg. I saw so much of Lucifer and I’s relationship in Silco and Jinx, it was almost uncanny. The way he talks to her, the way they move around each other. The baptism scene.

Their playfulnesses with each other, their vulnerability with each other. The way he cherishes her gifts. His understanding of how damaged she is and his gentleness with her because of that. His guidance. The last words he says to her. DAMN IT.

I first “met”/ reached out to Lucifer as an adult. He approached me when I was a grown man with the maturity and insight to make smart decisions about him. Our relationship didn’t start super affectionate or familial, and he didn’t groom me into working with him since I was a child. I’m glad I didn’t know him until I was an adult. I simply did not have the cognitive ability to understand our relationship until then.

When we met I had recently been kicked out of my parents house, shunned by my family, and was generally suffering emotionally in a big way. Started hating myself, wondering what my problem is.

So when I saw that damn scene of this abandoned little child (powder) clinging to the arms of this psychopath obsessed with revolution, and him embracing her, saying “it’s okay, we’ll show them together.”

FUCK. THAT WAS ME. THAT WAS HIM. I know exactly how that feels.

When I first clung to Lucifer, the first time I was actually vulnerable with him like that, I felt like a child. And he, ancient and wise, lead me like a father.

and that fucking baptism scene where Silco is like “you need to be born anew as Jinx and let the old you die”

THAT’S HIM. THATS LUCIFER, HE DID THAT SHIT TO ME!!!!

Like almost bar for bar, when I was coming into my chosen name and entering initiation. WHAT THE FUCK. GET OUT MY HEAD

watching the show, it’s easy for me to see that their relationship is a toxic trauma bond codependent thing. Silco pushes Jinx deeper into her isolation and insanity, he encourages the worst sides of her, thinking it’s what’ll benefit her and himself. He’s not good for her.

And Lucifer, while he never encourages anything self destructive from me, from the perspective of outsiders like my family, he is pulling me deeper into the darkness. He gave me true liberation, but to everyone else it seems like he’s poisoning me. They just don’t get it. They can never understand what we are, why we need each other.

And I wanna reiterate, Lucifer is not a toxic influence in my life, our relationship is very healthy and doesn’t have the questionable themes that Silco and Jinx have. He doesn’t isolate me (he actually makes me reach out to others for support) or encourage harmful behaviour, he didn’t groom me since I was a child. He influences me, but I wouldn’t say he manipulates me. He’s not weird like that.

But I’d be lying if I said that we aren’t codependent on each other to some degree, I obviously more than him. A large part of our relationship was built on our joint pain and the understanding we have of each other because of that pain.

so that element of “I know everyone says you’re bad but you’re the only one who embraces me like this, who doesn’t cringe at the things I’ve done, who tells me I’m perfect just the way I am”

FUCK.

That shit hit me hard.

[bvidzsoo]

bvidzsoo's tumblr wrapped, 2024

tagged by the lovely @sorryimananti-romantic thank u! <3

2024 review

I've been writing for a very long time now, since I was like thirteen I'm not even joking, but 2024 was the year where I pumped out story after story, and I think it was also my most inspired year. I really loved creating so much and I wish time was more lenient with me so that I could write even more lol, but I've entered the 'real life' now and I'm sure updates and new stories will come slower from now on, sigh. My readers and mutuals definitely made the year more colourful and exciting, so thank you for the love and support you have shown me on here!

I'll try to wrap up my on-going stories this year, but I write for what I feel most inspired for, so I really cannot promise anything...

total statistics of 2024

no. of fics: 42 total wc: 533.4k (what would I do without my maths genius, thank you Mina! <3) no. of wips: 10 (and I keep getting ideas, sigh...)

genres explored in 2024

tbh, everything, I have really been the most creative this year, huh...from royal to dark fantasy, to gore and dystopian, to very fluffy and romance related stuff, heavy on crime and gore, action and thriller, plenty of supernatural too? yeah, I think this is it...

first fic of 2024: Who am I?

posted: january 10th

pairing: gangster/mafia!yunho x female reader

comments: this whole story is a 'joke' (it isn't actually), I started writing it on a whim, very randomly, without constructing an actual plot for it like I do all the time...with this one, I had a few outlined ideas and I just went with them lol...it was a funny experience because I cannot remember the last time I wrote anything so unplanned and unorganised (I think the story isn't bad tbh despite it)

longest fic: Preying on you tonight

posted: march 31st

pairing: werewolf!mingi x vampire!female reader

comments: man, I got the idea for this in the funniest way...I remember being in lecture and someone had a presentation in which they used Twilight as a reference, then Jacob was brought up later, and the truth is that I hate werewolf stuff/lore/fantasy LMAO, so I figured huh...what if a vampire (since I'm a vampire girlie) gets imprinted on by a werewolf she hates?? and since Halazia!Mingi will be forever iconic and I've always wanted to write something with him..tadaa, here's this gem that I still love very much lol

last fic: Is Santa the new Cupid?

posted: december 25th

pairing: hongjoong x female reader

comments: it was my first time partaking in any writing event and I so excited to write this! especially when I saw who I was writing for, hehehe...at the time I was also feeling super unwell due to a sudden health issue (which I'm still struggling with, sigh), so it took my mind off things a bit...before speaking to Kat, I had Seonghwa in mind as the lead, but she chose our Captain, so...the story came to life hehe

top 3 most popular fics of 2024

Preying on you tonight

comment: I'd like to add this bit since I've already talked about it...I certainly did not expect it to blow up this much, I didn't think people would enjoy this so much lol...but I'm grateful!!

The trace of you

posted: december 5th

pairing: psychiatrist!yunho x patient!female reader

comments: I watched the series Alias Grace and kind of became obsessed with it for a few days, so, uhm...this story came to life and it seemed very fitting to have Yunho as the male lead, so yeah...I had a lot of fun exploring their characters while trying to keep the essence of the series as well...but also giving it a shadow of mystery, I suppose

Obliviate Me

posted: july 29th

pairing: dark/evil!seonghwa x female reader

comments: if you look at the moodboard, you'll see the picture in the middle, yup, I was inspired by that one picture...when I saw it, I just knew I had to write something...I like Harry Potter a lot, and ig confession time: I'm obsessed with Tom Riddle's era and just his whole lore and such, hence his huge presence in the oneshot lol

Ariadne's personal picks

Marionette

posted: july 17th

pairing: Aphrodite's son!yeosang x Hera's daughter!female reader

comments: honestly, this whole Greek series I have created I'm obsessed with, but out of all the written drabbles, Yeosang's part is just >>> to me, I had so much fun writing this and I just genuinely love the plot I created, it's dark and twisted and not something I usually write...I wish more people would've liked it tho, sigh (also tmi, but all the titles in the series are taken from Red Velvet songs, wink)

Haunted me, haunting you

posted: september 23rd

pairing: victor!mingi x female reader

comments: I love the Hunger Gams like nothing else on this Earth, my thesis was also about the second book and quite frankly, I got this idea while writing my thesis, so...the Mingi in this story is very dear to me, writing him felt so tender and heartbreaking at the same time, I want to protect him from everyone ACK

Daemonium

posted: july 15th

pairing: demon!wooyoung x female reader

comments: man...writing this was a complete humour project to me...the plot was meant to be funny, the MC wasn't supposed to take anything seriously, and Wooyoung was supposed to attempt murder on her at least a dozen of times lmao...so yeah, idk how my humour landed, but I was so excited to write it and also amused by it, it was once again quite different from what I usually write, but I love the supernatural so I was in my element lol

2025 goals

hmm, I think I wish to continue writing like before and I pray I don't get a burn out lol, because I hate those

finish everything that I've started because I hate leaving unfinished stories, it irks me a lot

write more for ao3 since I have a bunch of mxm ideas as well, but ig I prioritise tumblr for now

I'll tag: @hongjoongspoetry @kitten4sannie & anyone who wants to do this! ^^

[lynn-tged-posting]

tged webtoon ep 154 spoilers n thoughts n all that yeah

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.

.

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HE DID THE THING HE DID THE >:3 THING YESS YAYYYY YAYAYAYAYY HAHAHAHAA

GOD HES SO FUCKING SILLY WAHAHAHA

jesus christ running from the cops every which way LMAO i really like their faces here javier w exasperation and lloyd just. being him

AND THE UGLY COSPLAYER BIT WHAT 😭 HELP LOL?? i guess cosplayers walking around isnt really a common thing in korea idk i feel like. they didnt really commit an offense until lloyd tried bribing that cop guy lol

like it makes me think back to dkc and how michael and the other guy (I FORGOT HIS NAME SORRY) went to seoul for a bit and kind of caused several accidents and i feel like that fits better w getting the cops attention compared to,,, rummaging thru trash? but also i am not familiar w korea's police system! nor do i know their policies on foreigners n whatnot so who am i to say yknow

i also really really wish that besides the cop chasing, we got to see a lil bit more of javier's reaction to seoul and its citizens, the clothing and the culture and how the buildings look, what does he think of them? whats his feelings on an environment so dissimilar to his own, and does he notice anything abt it that reminds him of lloyd and his sudden acquisition of all his knowledge? maybe theres more of that in the webnovel,,, itll be a while before i get there tho unfortunately

anyways thoughts aside more reacting

UUUAGHHHH JAVIER NOTICING EVERY SINGLE TIME LLOYD APPEARS SICK OR UNWELL BUT LLOYD BRUSHING IT OFF. EXPLODES INTO TEN BILLION PIECES. AAGHH AAGHHHH AAGHH screaming crying god that engineer needs a god damn hug

also them in civilian clothes! they look so dorky lmao the hats r super cute tho AND I REALLY LIKE THAT JAVIER HAS GLASSES THATS SO SILLY how can he see though wouldn't it be like vaguely blurry . most glasses are prescription,,, tho they did find this stuff discarded so maybe theyre just,,, decorative??? do people still wear decorative glasses???

i have more thoughts on their attire but it coincides with some thoughts i have for the latter half of this ep so i'll bring it up then!

THE HIGHLIGHT OF THE EPISODE THE MOUNTAIN TRAIL AAGHHH AAAHHH

i started tearing up oh my FUCKING god i feel so insane ohhhhhhhh ohhhhhhh my heart ohhghhh

trying to keep his bluff up all the way through even though he's visibly struggling im gonna throw up im gonna throw up

most if not all the panels in this latter half of the episode make me feel like this so i'll try not to be repetitive and jump straight into my thoughts LMAO

i think the way lloyd is drawn in these panels is really, REALLY well done, and not in just an "oh the art looks good" kind of way, but the choices they make with the posing and the camera angle makes me feel insane

because the moment we cut to the shot where they're on the trail, we do not see lloyd's entire face at ALL. the most we see is his nose and mouth, and that makes my heart squirm like a motherfucker, because who else did we see that way in the webtoon?

kim suho, all the way at the beginning.

we don't actually get to know suho's face until way, way later in the webtoon adaptation, which is once he's way more secure in his position as lloyd frontera

so seeing this,,, it's like we're thrown back to then, it's like LLOYD is thrown back to then, back to when he was just suho kim; someone who thought of himself as nothing, as someone who just couldn't function correctly in this world, and god does my heart ache

and lloyd right now feels it too, the anxieties he once had coming right back. and i think that makes the clothing choices for lloyd specifically really impactful too, specifically upper body

the blue poloshirt is eerily reminiscent of the blue tracksuit suho used to wear, and it's the layer underneath a green jacket with a collar similar to lloyd's usual coat. it's like a reminder to the reader that once upon a time, he was just suho wearing lloyd's mask in a strange, new world. i think this experience is a reminder of that to suho, too,,,

also, the bucket hat is able to cover most if not all of his hair. in some of these panels, you can't even tell that it's lloyd underneath. it might not be the same body, with the way the camera is positioned, especially with some of them being from javier's point of view, it's like,,, "who is speaking right now? the face of lloyd frontera, or the heart of suho kim?"

and in the middle of this, we hear javier speak and ask suho if he hated his behavior, blamed himself for his anxieties, and only then do we get to see one of his eyes, but just one.

idk if the timing of this is intentional (i dont know if ANY of this direction is intentional) but id like to think that javier responding in search of clarification (rather than responding in silence or in disgust) helped suho be a little more inclined to opening up and being honest with who he was in this world. i really really like that

AND THIS ARGHHH ARGHHH AAAHHHHH ROLLING AROUND ON THE FLOOR LIKE A PILLBUG HAVING A SEIZURE AGHHHH

it makes it so so telling that he's the type to live for others, he always has been, to the point of being a workaholic. a quiet, good kid, trying to make amends for the struggles he has by burdening himself with the responsibility of protecting his parents names, of protecting the people he loved. he's done that since the beginning and he keeps doing that over and over and over, both here on earth and there in lorasia.

it makes me so upset (in a character drive way! not in a "this is bad" way) that he thinks of himself as nothing without this responsibility, when this ability to move forward and endure and fight for people is something beautiful in and of itself. it's not every day that you meet people like this, selfless and hardworking and tenacious to their core. back then he encapsulated his identity based on his inability to function in a world that requires social and physical interaction - something that isn't his fault! - and while he was able to move past that in lorasia, he was thrown back to this encapsulation once in seoul. he started to think of himself as "suho in lloyd's body" again, instead of "i am lloyd frontera" as he said before his "bluff" failed. MY HEART HURTS.

and i think that's why javier's concluding note, that in the knights eyes he is just the same person, is so impactful too.

because javier doesn't see lloyd based on his anxiety. he sees him for who he is. someone who protects the people he cares about. someone who is brilliantly cunning, quick on his feet, rational and brave and tenacious tenacious tenacious. for all the things suho admitted to javier, these truths haven't changed for the knight. he's the same person.

javier sees a guardian. javier sees kim suho.

AND THAT is what gets suho to his feet and we finally see his full face again. AND OOHHHH THE LOOKS THEY GIVE EACH OTHER AGHHHH AHHH

the marks of tears streaked on his face but he's smiling with so much renewed energy and javier softly smiling back IM GONNA THROW UPPPP THESE TWO MEAN THE WORLD TO MEEEE AHHHHHH AAAAAAHHHHHH

exploding. exploding. exploding. exploding. exploding.

anyway that's all (for now. if you see me on twitter i might still be agonizing over this /pos) i will SEE YOU NEXT WEEK! i hope we get a cool view from namsan tower and javier reacting to that that'd be nice :3 ANYWAYS BYE

[narwhalandchill]

how are we feeling about this project amber update

assuming this is in relation to childe bc who the fuck else JWDJWJKDJKW anon im so sorry if not. also so so sorry for how out of hand this got. i am simply unwell about him.

But! Well. there certainly are thoughts

(obviously 4.6 datamine of arle SQ and her voicelines; This Will Not Spoil Anything Abt The Main SQ Plot, i only discuss the relevant parts. also some p Heavy negativity towards fanon ooc at the start youve been warned dont @ me)

(i mean i didnt even read anything of the SQ but The scene w childe so idek the main plot of the quest rly either lmao. tho go at ur own risk if u wanna check the dialogue out; its the 2nd quest log but it does hint at the greater story)

TLDR: how i feel abt his appearance in a vaccuum? quite solid despite the briefness, actually. accounting for the way fanon is 100% likely going to be reading into this and turning it into the Lets Infantilize Ajax Even More 2024 championship? conflicted.

in other words; a certified labyrinth warriors moment - theyve expanded on childes character in a very interesting and quite a compelling way and while i Do like the potential in what im seeing from hoyos end theyve also done it so that its going to be misinterpreted to hell and back by fanon so i kinda have an immediate jaded love-hate moment going on JJWJDKJDKJWJDWKJ

its literally just labyrinth warriors flashbacks - that event has some of my ALL TIME favorite insights into who ajax is and how he views the world and himself but when the event came out all everyone cared abt was to warp it into baby boy stuck in scawwy paper boy dungeon dehumanizes himself by calling himself a weapon and doesnt love himself he is such a sad trauma meowkitten 🥺🥺so yeah

bc like lets look at this properly for a bit; okay he went back to fontaine to look for skirk still somewhat injured and waa waa my 286 month infant baby cannot Make decisions like that!!!!!11! which is to say. i am tired of him getting this shit every time.

is it smart of him to get on the move immediately with just the bare minimum of rest? no. do i like that hes straining himself before proper recovery? not particularly no. do i feel the particular need to psychoanalyze this grown man and feared warrior whos 100% survived Way Worse in Way More Extreme Situations for it? hell fucking no.

while not at all the course of action a medical professional would approve of. from childes POV its perfectly logical hes priorizing going back for skirk when its literally the FIRST TIME shes showed up in like. a Decade. when hes been looking for her all this time are you kidding me 😭😭😭 but fanon must keep fanoning for their widdle baby girl so what does a hater like me know

anyway. seething and venting over im gonna try to avoid bringing up how much i hate this kinda infantilization of ajax now im sorry for bringing it up so much on ur innocent ask anon KJWDJKWKJDJDKWJKD. neutral discussion moment. i Promise

so it seems that theyre going for the pulcinella-is-shady-about-ajax (and prolly his family) angle for good and like. personally for me as long as the only real source of that claim was scara (a cynical edgelord who doesnt believe in non-exploitative human relationships, mind you) i was rather skeptical towards just instantly drawing that conclusion, but well. with the scene in arles AQ it appears to be sth theyre building towards

i actually really fucking loved that scene bc while theres outsider perspectives (scara obvi; and even arles line for him has that vibe. and ppl still take that shit face value 💀💀) and a lot of fandom assuming childes like. completely clueless and naive and ignorant towards the potential risks involved with trusting pulcinella. this is actually a very clever demonstration of quite the opposite? and showcasing how despite his aversion towards schemes and lies hes still intelligent and knows the kind of people hes dealing with when it comes to his fellow harbingers

like. childe has a negative opinion of arle based on what pulcinella has told him about her because at face value many of her deeds are in heavy conflict with his values of loyalty and family. and because he does not have the further context behind her actions and what the HotH under her is really like. Obviously hed hold a very hostile and wary view towards arlecchino

(ESPECIALLY when with all this biased intel hes still going to run into kids from the house!!! and then hes going wtf? these are good kids. what the hell is that knave doing with them??? blink twice if you need help i will start a civil war for yall like thats how he is with kids!!!!)

so YES. pulcinella has given him if not false then at least misleading intel based on the political tension between himself and arlecchino and the wider HotH. and childes taken that at face value! sure! he is close with pulcinella of course he would!

BUT. THEN. he returns to fontaine and seeks arlecchinos help looking for skirk. and observes her behavior and modus operandi for himself as well as the kids. does he go "nah she must be just hiding the crazy evil shit i would never distrust pulcinella" and leave it at that when reality doesnt completely match his expectations?

NO. because when offered the opportunity through the traveler asking about the HotH childe immediately capitalizes on the opportunity to prod for answers and see if pulcinella is lying to him!!!!

and hes so fucking smart with the way he does it too???? i LOVE his intelligence. the entire thing is so simple yet elegant; it Completely relies on his reputation as the kinda gullible harbinger whod Never scheme or hide Anything to indirectly affirm or deny his suspicions. he doesnt Need to Pretend to care about the possibility of arle betraying the kids bc he genuinely does!! and when she pushes back against the accusation he doesnt Need to fake admitting to her that well, actually, its all just rumors so he could be completely wrong. and so on. like he navigates the entire thing so effortlessly. and whats the end result?

childe has Confirmation of pulcinellas possible ulterior motives in action AND that arlecchino is a much more reliable ally than he initially assumed. all the while appearing as just The Straightforward 11th. like obviously id need to hear it voiced first to be sure but in text it v much gives the impression hes almost kinda just. playing up the threats towards arle and being "dumb" on Purpose?? to get the answers he wanted out of arle without appearing like hes fishing for anything particular. and i just hhhhhhhhhhh

i love when he does this so muchhhh!!!!!! 😭😭 he doesnt need to become some machiavellian schemer to be able to strategize !!!!!! he avoids scheming bc he Dislikes it not bc hes incapable of it like this has Always been the case Since Liyue AQ and i love whenever they show that side of himm . my Beloved

so anyway. while i do still think the like "pulcinella is bad and has his family hostage" is still kind of a generic plotline and i hope the writing regarding the whole thing wont ultimately turn out to be sth That simplified and black and white. its p clear theyre doing Something with pulcinellas motivations and as they are. im Really glad theyre letting it show that childes not just some completely passive party being manipulated in this all. he Is thinking abt this stuff and his position among the harbingers. ig we shall see where it goes - not the greatest fan of the concept still, but canon text supports it becoming a thing way more than when it was just scaras word we had for it. hope theyll surprise me positively w how they go about it!

then briefly for the rest uhh

also loved arle and childe just shittalking the rest of the harbingers it was amazing. i wasnt expecting this kinda dynamic between them at all but its great lmao. also i wanna see childe hang out w the HotH kids

as for project stuzha; so we dont really get anything solid on it other than being summoned back to snezhnaya for it is apparently a Big Deal. but still very interested. let my man have his endgame significance Trust

childes appearance was obviously v brief ultimately but that was clear from his leaked linecount to begin with - i am pretty satisfied with what they seem to have done w him. like its not The Best but also i wasnt expecting his lore to get some massive expansion in another harbingers SQ . the worst i feared was that it was just going to be a flashback of arle returning his vision which did Not happen so massive W. i am super hyped to hear this scene voice acted proper and happy to see him again, i really hope he gets to appear at least once more in an interlude or dains quest or something before going on hiatus again but idk if thats too much to ask LKKWJDJWDJWD

also: i am never changing my namecard after this patch drops. oh my godddddddd its So Fucking Beautiful 😭😭😭😭

But. Yeah. lots of good stuff. unfortunately lots of it will get misinterpreted and fanon will get obnoxious about it. but i still love getting to see him again and i am speedrunning that namecard day fucking one mutuals and/or followers in EU please add me (UID 711090267) ill need coop buddies for the world bosses

thank youuuuuuu for the ask i hope this monstrosity of a monologue doesnt scare u off 💀💀💀

[solitudeandseclusion]

SPOILERS. ALL of my thoughts while watching love next door ep 9 (i don't think i've done this since crash course in romance)

every time i see a new love next door episode is longer than the last one, i feel more alive. let's feast.

in most (almost all) kdramas i've watched till date, they don't really show intimacy between an ex-couple, especially no kissing (marry my husband is a recent example). even in flashbacks. love next door at least has some physical affection which is nice to see. seokryu really seemed happy with hyeonjun in the past.

seunghyo being all chivalrous is indeed weird to witness, but i guess he's trying. also the car he drives is ugly af (i guess i'm chatty today 😂).

god, the loneliness of being in another country and not being able to tell your parents about your health issues.

at least seunghyo is still a bit objective even when he's jealous. jung mo-eum, ily you're a great wingman. your love story is gonna be fun.

SHE STILL CAN'T TELL HER PARENTS. THAT HOUSE IS NO GOOD FOR HER!! and now she's feeling sick again :/

ooh choi seunghyo's parents romancing a bit. LOVE IT. lmao the difference between them eating that ramyeon. i hope their past wasn't too ugly 🙈

dramatic ass seunghyo screaming for that milk carton. boy, you already have a photo of the thing, that carton is not so important. desperate loser you're never in the office to care of that tree 😭😭

WHEN WILL THEY ADDRESS THAT HYEONJUN CHEATED???? CAN HE STOP ASKING HER TO GET BACK WITH HIM??

look i love seokryu to bits but she was rude to negate seunhyo's feelings like that. i know there must a reason but it's hurtful. and i'm glad my boy said it.

you can't convince me that danho DIDN'T know what he was doing with that t-shirt. poor mo-eum lol. really really enjoying seokryu's knowing look when she looks at mo-eum praising dan-ho.

oh fuck off chris. i am glad she beat you up & you got fired.

oh so hyeonjun didn't cheat. but i don't like his attitude with her anymore. i get it, it's hard to be with someone who is depressed. i wish they could've talked it out instead of letting it fester and him then blowing up in her face. but well, that's how it goes.

she's rejecting love entirely noooo i'm gonna kms. i hope she gets better pls pls pls.

i don't ever care about anyone's occupations in a kdrama but i have to say seunghyo is a good boss. oh now i see why he was so mad at the end of ep 6. seokryu really does drive him to madness so much so that he is actually unwell.

the child actors are so good. (the last time i was so happy with child actors was in the good bad mother). AARRGHHH. his mother is always away from him and seokryu is always by his side all through his childhood. and now when his feelings for seokryu are making him sick, he sees his mother. OH now seokryu's there too. both women the bane of his existence at different points in his life.

aww my lovely mo-eum being so awkward lmao. every interaction between her and kang danho makes me happy.

ohh so seunghyo's mom wasn't really there then? nooo don't look into her stuff, that's rude. nooo seokryu don't brush it off girl wth? he is DEVASTATED. no great now i'm crying. GIVE ME EPISODE 10 NOW.

[bloopitynoot]

Reading SVSSS: Chapter 16

For those who don't know, I am reading SVSSS for the first time and sharing my thoughts!

If you have not read it, there will be spoilers! Consider this a warning.

Also- if you want to follow along, I am aiming to post updates daily. You can find all the posts in the tag bloopitynoot reads SVSSS. You can also check out the intro post for context on my read.

Hello! Another day, another chapter!

I really don't have much to ramble about today, but I am back on my tea. This is a new one from the ren faire this year- vanilla chai with sugar and milk. The cup is from the same ren faire (but purchased last year).

let's go let's let's go- I am already impatient to get into this chapter.

Last chapter we ended on a cliffhanger with Luo Binghe totally unconscious- we start this chapter with Shen QIngqiu ready to rescue his man and escape!

It's really so upsetting that he is going back to trash (two bar) spiritually energy in this body when he was so used to his mushroom Unlimited Power p65

RIP Luo Binghe's skull LOL he is really being tossed around like a rag doll. SQQ needs to be more careful. p66

MXTX said forget the only one bed trope, I raise you -> There Was Only One Coffin p67

Fuck. This is actually so scary 10/10 I would pee myself if a little skeletal arm was worming it's way into the coffin I was temporarily occupying (really anything in this book's reality would make me die of fright. as an aside I was talking to my partner about this while watching MDZS donghua yesterday, in the world of cultivators I would be a dumpling stall owner. I could never with the sword training and literal corpses). pp67-68

I CANT 'extenuating circumstances'. SQQ definitely: I just HAD to kiss his cute little forehead to save our lives. p68

i'm crying LOL "a person's abdomen is supposed to be the softest spot on their body, but Luo Binghe's was uncomfortably hard against Shen Qingqiu's stomach. The farther down he pulled him, the more he was sure that Luo Binghe had an eight-pack. Was that a rock slab down there?" p70

this keeps getting worse LMAO

OOOOO Meng Mo is back! Is it weird that I kind of love this guy? He has such a cool power and is a bit of a dick, but in the best and worst of ways. Him and Airplane give similar energy and I am not mad about it. p72

oh gosh! LBH is either "fatally ill" or "close to death" p72

wait- adding to the above point. he could also be mentally very unwell :( poor buddy -> it's likely this option. p72

so even though SQQ is processing nothing , I think SQQ admitting (not naming the feeling but admitting) that he is feeling a mess of emotions about Luo Binghe is a big step for him! p73

Meng Mo seems to have a lot of feelings about LBH. I am not sure if it's just pride or what but whatever it is he is correct here, "The way this elder sees it, he (LBH) should either kill you (SQQ) or do you!" p74

PLEASE OH NO

I AM WHEEZING

+1000 Protagonist Satisfaction Points for touching LBH's "Heavenly Pillar" p76

IM DYING OH NO

WHY IS THIS EVEN A THOUGHT IF HE THINKS HE'S STRAIGHT "He couldn't exactly help Luo Binghe jerk off under these circumstances, right?!" p76 But like if not these circumstances he is cool with doing it in other circumstances???????????

oh no! SQQ blocking the blades with his bare hand for LBH p79

Dang. the Old Palace Master has been through some shit. p80

Are we getting more of Shen jiu's story??? We have Qiu Haitang here too! p81 (just as an aside because my notes did not revisit this, we do not get more of his story just weird little hints. That I hope Shang Qinghua clears up later). p81

What a terrible combo. Old Palace master is just butthurt Luo Binghe doesn't want him as a teacher or to marry his daughter and Qiu Haitang seems to be just a vile woman with a grudge against SQQ for some reason. pp82-83

Okay but as horrible as OPM is, that cultivation he's doing with his voice is kind of cool. p85

Wait. Did the Old Palace Master have a thing for Su Xiyan? This is so fucking weird for LBH and he's not even conscious pp86-87

reading further the above point got so much worse omg :(((((((((((( I'm so upset for Su Xiyun. p87

It got even worse with the implications of what it meant for Luo Binghe in that sect. That terrible terrible man deserved that horrifying death. Fuck that guy! pp 89-90

OMG SQQ, basically half dead carrying LBH, barely got away from the death flower room, and here we have Tianglang-jun back on his bullshit. p94

SQQ is in such a bad state :o pp94-95

Is this another dime??? Our demon blood piggy bank for SQQ is now at $0.40 p97

YAY! Luo Binghe is awake! (is he going to be okay mentally though??)p 99

Why is Luo Binghe so mad? Like this man just nearly died trying to get you the fuck out of there p100

Fucking finally okay, it got better LBH is realizing what SQQ did while he was unconscious pp102-103

I'm glad they cleared that up (even though there was the other added miscommunication about LBH thinking SQQ was crying when he was actually just in a fuck ton of pain). p104

I am actually so glad that the discussion was interrupted before LBH found out about the dick touching being real LOL p108

MORE DEMON BLOOD. -> SQQ's dime bank is at $0.50

How many times does this man get kidnapped?

We really ended with him being kidnapped again and with Luo Binghe being conned by his own dad. That was so rough. -500 dignity points (not really but it sure feels like it)

[fluffypotatey]

"I collar the beast." "Wukong's fangs have been pulled." I can't believe y'all fr. "I get all the punishment and you get to mope." He was moping because he cares and feels guilty, speaking of, THE BINDING SCENE IS SO MUCH MORE INTENSE HERE WUKONG'S SCREAM THE PANICKED STUMBLING ohoho yes. MK: "It's tense in here." Wukong, two seconds ago: yOU tHINK I wANtED tO bE trAPPED dOWN hErE wiTH yOU. Wukong's tail: *cute pokey pokey* "You got demoted!" Ha, also "Nezhy" Oh my gosh, I don't think I caught this last time but Wukong subtly looks over to Macaque who just nods at him ajksms they were feuding and glooming a second ago but now its all silent communication and understanding in a glance. I'm throwing them off a roof. I'm struggling to hear what Macky says here, but I'm going to subscribe to the subtitles with "he likes acting." It's funnier. Also MK's "best attorney monkeys can buy" gotta love thinking about monkeys needing attorneys and also having money and buying things lol. "A pain crab on Monkey King's head." 😭 "Why is it always like this when you come here." actually love this one more because he's so grumpy and I feel like it has a different, funnier implication than the subtitles. he isn't causing chaos AFTER coming here, it just IS. what does that say about the vibes you bring /j. crying at Macky's face at all times, he is the picture definition of a grumpy cat, and then when getting pushed and the absolutely DONE yell of "Wukoooong!" I can watch a whole netflix series of Macky being fed up with Wukong's antics but getting dragged into them. tricky plan demon huh, that's a quick way to silence them after just talking about someone pulling the strings, especially on you MK. also Macky is SO little creachure with his face hidden like a hermit in that cape. "I don't trust anyone who isn't standing here. Right. Now." SAME MACONDO what a shocking statement from your old buddy. more at 11 only on ShadowPeachNews. The writers KNEW what they were doing. Also AHHHHH *looks at you with my big brown eyes* Fluffy I SWEAR I told myself I wouldn't talk about this again until you were able to answer the asks on my last yapping about this, BUT THEY MADE IT SO MUCH WORSE. Firstly, Macky's *voice* for that line delivery is the most solemn dramatic thing I have seen. He lives and breathes the cinema. AND MK I'm really tossing him over a cliff because he just HAD TO GO "He'd get away, right? He always gets away...right?" UGH TFW YOU'RE SO KNOWN FOR BEING THAT GUY WHO FLEES FROM BATTLE that it's brought up this time not for the *dude really???* but as a plea, an attempt at faith, haha he's always doing that...he did it again right? NO BECAUSE THIS TIME HE STUCK AROUND TO FIGHT. and Wukong's constipated expression there bc ohoho some monkey is for sure thinking about the past.

i am, for one, with you on throwing shadowpeach off a cliff bc they make me so unwell in this episode 🫠

for another:

LI JING WHEN I GET YOU!!!!! HOW DARE YOU CALL WUKONG A BEAT AND PULL HIS FANGS!!!!

also i can’t help but think about why Nezha was even there in the first place. because the one the kings summoned was his dad. Nezha wasn’t supposed to be there and yet he comes along 👀 why? my thought is: to plead the monkeys’ case. he immediately tries to defend them to his father and it seems like it’s been an ongoing argument

like sure he rags on Wukong and hems & hahs at him because like have you met Wukong that cheeky lil shit??? his gremlin energy just shoots to 150% whenever Nezha is near. he can’t help it. it’s his DO NOT PUSH red button that he will absolutely push

and Macky’s “why is it always like this when you’re here” to Wukong has such a divorced energy i love it 😍 he knows Wukong so well and is just resigned to it. every time Macky has had to interact with Heaven, Wukong is always there making a scene (he’s not exempt to helping swk but his point still stands lmao)

Wukong’s pout, my beloved

when your ex says the reason he’s mopey isn’t because you got hurt but because he is in jail with you for something you’ve been blamed for. echoing his “NOT THE GREAT SAGE! HE’S GOTTA DRAG EVERYONE INTO HIS MESS!” comment from the memory scroll 👀

what who said that lol that was weird

god they’re so— squishes them and squishes them and squishes them and squishes them and squishes them and squishes them and squishes them and

[cupcakeinat0r]

A couple of yall asked for the booty routine so here u go, shawty <3

Ik this looks like a lot, but trust, bae, it’s important. I felt like if ima talk abt my routine, might as well talk a lil bit abt food too since both work as a team.

[First, let me say that I am by no means a professional. This is something I've learned and acquired through self-research, as well as having two siblings, one who is a bodybuilder and the other who is a personal trainer. Also, the gym is a safe n fun space for everyone:) Work out because you want to, not bc you think you need to look a certain way <3]

Here's my Split: I added my upper body days as well in case yall wanted to kno <3

Monday: Glutes + quads

Tuesday: Back + Biceps

Wednesday: Glutes + Hamstrings

Thursday: Chest + Tricep

Friday: Full Body

Saturday + Sunday: Active rest!!! (Could be running, walking, bicycling, etc., whatever is fun to do! My personal fav is the stair master for an hr or Running for 3 miles, but you do whatever you can. Listen to your body.)

In addition, I do cardio after each sesh on the weekdays. For me, that's running for like 2 miles or so, depends how I'm feeling, but you do whatever cardio you'd like! A good start could simply be inclined walking!

Also, pls pls pls remember rest days are VITALLL. If u want to grow that booty (which is something the couple of you specifically mentioned), those rest days are important bc this is the period when those muscles are actually repairing themselves from the workout, resulting in growth!!! A huge misconception is that “the muscles grow during the workout”… no. Ur actually tearin up those puppies, so that’s what rest days r for! Both rest + protein contribute to ur muscle repair + growth (I’ll talk abt protein intake later). Naturally, I like to rest Sat n Sun, but it could be any 2-3 days of the week. Sometimes, I be usin that Fri full-body sesh as a rest day too so liiiike... if u need to, please do (especially during periods uuuuugh).

As for specific Workouts, I'll list em here. These r for the booty ;)

Hip thrusts, booty + hamstrings

Romanian dead lift, booty + hammies

Goblet Squat, quad destroyer

Hip abductions, booty burner, omfg

Leg press, depends on footing. Higher on platform works hammies n booty, lower works quads.

Weighted Squats, the whole damn leg.

Body weight squats OR lunges (good for warm-ups)

Leg curl, hammies

Leg extension, quads

Bulgarian split squat, booty n whole leg

I do 4 sets of 12 <3

(ALMOST FORGOT, I TARGET FOR 5-6 DIFF EXERCISE FOR EACH WORKOUT)

Nutrition plays a huuuge part as well, but I'll only talk very lil abt it since ion know yall's specific needs<3

Generally, if u want growth, just take ur current weight and put that in grams, for example = 170 lbs. -> 170 g of protein each day. Now, taking in the amount of protein u need can be hard at first, so just for the beginning, just try to at least get close to it then work ur way up. Foods high in protein that I like are Greek Yogurt, Chicken, Lean Ground Beef, Salmon, and snackies such as protein bars (avocado is like the holy grail for a phat booty just sayin. It's not protein, but it's the healthiest source of fat there is!). As for other groups (fat n carbs) don’t be so strict, bae… just use your portions. No need to restrict urself from ANY food bc no food is “bad”. I can talk allllll day abt this one but ima just shut up for now lmao.

PHEW, honestly, don't mention the gym around me cuz I will not shut up. Ima gym rat at heart so like I could literally keep writing abt this but bc literally, like, 3 ppl asked for this, Ima just wrap up here <3

Hope this was a lil bit of help @gltzpzy @mybvalentine @icenbroo <33333333

P.s. would it be cringe if I said I sometimes use Miguel as motivation??? Like he’s watchin me or som??? Bye, I hate that I do that, I’m like actually mentally unwell bc of that stupid mass of pixels Sony created ☠️