#actually something by alt-j fits better but this Is the song that’s on all three of my related writing playlists

[sforzesco]

I guess it's time to feel /something/ about Crassus asking Pompey to help him control the crowds so he could leave Rome to Parthia, essentially having Pompey walking Crassus to his death.

HELL YEAH @garland-on-thy-brow has an extremely fun post about this

[nominnation]

A Wilted Flower

Pairing(s): Jaemin x Jeno

Synopsis: Jaemin wasn't expecting to find the love of his life while stopping to get flowers for his dying mother, but that's exactly what happened. Only problem is, Jaemin doesn't realize the peril that Jeno's life is in until it's too late.

Warnings: fluff, angst, depression, anxiety, eating disorders, major character death, alt. ending doesn't include death, mentions of homophobia (but it gets better), Jaemin is the dom in the relationship.

Word Count: 7322 words

Requested by: Hana on NCT Amino

Author's Notes: This has been posted on NCT Amino as well as ao3. It is also incredibly angsty, but there is an alternative ending that is fluffy. Also, if you are suffering with depression, anxiety, or an eating disorder (or more), please, please seek help. You and loved and beautiful!

Marigolds and lilacs sprouted from window boxes, dangling their soft pedals onto the cobblestone streets. Their buds reached for the sky, eager to please their caretaker as their heads glowed with an array of colors that may have seemed odd at first glance, but upon further inspection, had the power to captivate even the stubbornest mind. Such was their owner's power.

Their owner, Lee Jeno, was a simple kind of man with cheeks that gleamed rose if a compliment fell from someone’s lips. He was tall and lanky, limbs long and strong, although they made him a little clumsy. His hair was cut short in a way that made it look fluffy and soft. His eyes were the kindest shade of brown. He was beautiful, and perhaps it was this reason that Na Jaemin fell in love with him the first time he saw him.

Jaemin’s feet had been lured away from his mother’s hospital bed by her command that he, at least, get lunch, so with a handkerchief swipe to his eyes, he left the building of sickness and made his way blindly down a nearby street, known for streetside food vendors and gift shops. Being in a bit of a rush to get back to his mother, he hurried down the street searching for the first food place that looked even the slightest bit appealing. However, he was stopped dead in his tracks as soon as his emotional eyes fell on the marigolds and lilacs sprouting beautifully in boxes outside a cozy stone-built flower shop with flowers popping out of every open window.

It wasn’t a question for Jaemin after that. His mother’s favorite flowers were marigolds, but it was so hard to find a flower shop that appreciated them too.

The wooden door to the small little shop was standing wide open, a green water hose snaking in through the entrance, leaving droplets of water nearby. Jaemin followed the path it lead straight through the door and to the most beautiful man he had ever seen in his entire life. A man that stole his breath away the second he saw him.

Sensing someone else’s presence, the man turned around and gave Jaemin a wide smile, eyes disappearing into crescent moons.

“Welcome to Jeno’s! How can I help you?” he asked.

His voice rang in Jaemin’s mind like a song he wouldn’t mind listening to for the rest of his life. His smile was so addictive that Jaemin couldn’t help but smile back.

“Hi, I’m Jaemin.”

A cheesy pickup line just seemed too good to use on this male. None would do him justice. They’d all simply be a disgrace falling on the beautiful pair of ears.

“Hello Jaemin! If you hadn’t guessed, I’m Jeno! What can I help you with today?”

Such a simple response almost had Jaemin’s knees buckling.

“I… um…” he stammered awkwardly before clearing his throat and taking a deep breath. “I’d like to get a bouquet of marigolds for my mother… and maybe to take you out for lunch,” he finally let out.

He had never been this nervous or awkward when talking to anyone else. For some reason, this male just had that effect on him.

The question seemed to catch Jeno off guard, and Jaemin thought he was about to get turned down by the only person he’d ever met that made his stomach do summersaults.

Finally, Jeno responded with another wide smile, possibly wider than the one he’d greeted with.

“Well actually, I’ve just finished eating, but I’d still very much like to join you!”

That answer was all it took to make Jaemin’s head get all fuzzy and bubbly like he’d had three glasses of wine. Perhaps Jeno was his new wine that Jaemin would never want to stop sipping.

The walk to a food vendor was pretty uneventful, save for the fact that Jaemin couldn’t keep his eyes off the gorgeous male that was walking beside him. The soft smile the man always seemed to wear and the clumsily way he stumbled over just about everything was adorable and fun to watch. Specifically how he bowed to everyone they passed that appeared to be some businessman or old couple out for a stroll. However, when they finally made their way to a vendor, Jeno perched in a seat at a table beneath a closed umbrella that Jaemin struggled to open.

“You don’t have to open it,” Jeno spoke softly after Jaemin let out a few strings of curse words, the effect of one of the mechanisms pinching his finger.

“I will get this thing to open!” Jaemin responded slightly angrily, his annoyance at the umbrella only growing as the sun faded material hit his cheek.

He struggled a bit longer, jaw locked into place and eyes glaring daggers into the cloth before his attention was drawn away by one of the most adorable sounds he’d ever heard in his entire life.

Jeno’s sweet laughter.

He paused in fighting, hands still gripping the mechanics of the umbrella, but now loosely as he turned his gaze to stare at the soft male who’d since drawn his lanky legs to his chest. A smile pulled itself onto his own lips.

“What?” he asked.

Jeno’s arms came to wrap around his legs and his chin rested upon his knees, making Jaemin desperately want to take a picture of the sight to save as his screensaver.

“You’re just so desperate to get that umbrella open, it’s cute,” he spoke, voice flowing out gently.

“Well I can’t have this sweet Flower sitting here getting too much sunlight,” Jaemin answered.

Pink tinted Jeno’s cheeks immediately and Jaemin had to fight the urge to pull out his phone for a picture.

Inside, he moved to release the umbrella, deciding it was better to leave it closed than spend his time with Jeno fighting with it, but as soon as his hand twisted slightly to release it, the shaft of the device twisted easily and the umbrella was flying open, shocking both boys into staring wide-eyed at the now proudly opened umbrella.

“Stupid thing,” Jaemin finally muttered, shaking his head as Jeno just shot him another smile.

Jaemin swore he could live off Jeno’s smiles.

“I’m going to grab something to eat now, are you sure I can’t get you anything?” he asked.

Jeno shook his head before pausing.

“Well, I wouldn’t mind a water,” he answered.

With a nod, Jaemin walked up to the window of the small food stall or ordered his own food, a simple burger and a milkshake along with Jeno’s water. It didn’t take long for the food to be in his hands, on a tray. He walked carefully back to their table and placed the water in front of the man before taking his own seat.

“Your water, Flower,” Jaemin spoke, grinning at the fitting nickname that brought pink back to Jeno’s cheeks,

“Thank you, my Gardener,” Jeno responded, cheeks going even more rosey.

Jaemin shot him another grin before taking a bite of his burger. As his eyes and attention settled on the food going into his hungry belly, he missed Jeno’s attention shifting away to play with the straw in his cup before taking a sip of water, keeping his eyes glued to the table and not the food entering Jaemin’s mouth.

“So why haven’t I seen you around here before? The people around here are usually pretty consistent,” Jeno spoke once he’d swallowed the mouthful of water, but his eyes still couldn’t meet Jaemin’s.

“I’m not usually around here. My mom’s in the hospital,” Jaemin said, voice audibly falling at the mention of his mother.

Jaemin watched Jeno’s eyes glass over with an apology and a question that was sure to come. Usually, he avoided the pity and questions, they were usually too difficult to answer, but for some reason, despite only knowing the man for a very short amount of time, he felt comfortable confiding in the male.

“She has breast cancer. She’s been struggling with it for about as long as I can remember, but last week it got really bad,” Jaemin found himself spewing, tears welling up in his eyes.

Jaemin was very much a mother’s boy. He loved his father, but he had always been closer with his mother. As her only child, he had spent most of his childhood being coddled and cuddled in her arms, given everything he ever needed and most of what he wanted.

“I’m so sorry Jaemin,” Jeno spoke, and Jaemin could hear the sincerity and heartache in his voice.

Jaemin gave a watery smile and shook his head lightly.

“She’ll be ok. This isn’t her first trip to the hospital,” Jaemin added, although he wasn’t sure whether it was meant to reassure Jeno or himself.

Jeno nodded although Jaemin could still see the way his eyes watered with unshed tears. It made him look even more beautiful than he already was. Jaemin swallowed a lump in his throat, as he trailed his eyes over the males face. Such a gorgeous man. Chocolate brown eyes, hair that fell just a little in his face, broad shoulders with a lean frame. Jaemin’s heart fluttered.

“I like you Jeno,” he said finally after staring at the male for a while.

Jeno seemed to jump a little, unsuspecting the sudden change of conversation nor the sudden compliment. He was even cuter when he was confused and blushing.

“I’d like to take you on a proper date sometime, if you’d let me,” he continued.

The blush on Jeno’s cheeks spread to his ears.

“I- really?” he asked, stammering in his nervousness.

“I’ll pick you up Saturday at 6.”

~

Saturday came and went, as did the next two month’s, and before Jaemin knew it, the September evening breeze had him wrapping his windbreaker jacket tighter around his body as he walked down the cobblestone streets. Many people passed him by, most bustling to the nearest food stand for dinner, other’s dressed up for dates. They were appealing, watching them run, each person with a different story to tell, and Jaemin would often find himself mindlessly watching them for hours. Now though, he had a higher priority.

The door to the flower shop was already closed, the welcoming sign flipped to closed and the main lights turned out. Jaemin paid no attention. It was the same way each day he returned from his own job. He pushed open the door he knew would be unlocked and waiting for him. The familiar bell jingled upon his entrance, jingling harder as he pushed the door closed and slid the lock into place. He turned around once the door was settled and walked slowly through the shop, careful not to trample on flowers Jeno had spent days nourishing back to health in the now warmed greenhouse room.

He found Jeno in the back of the shop, bringing in hanging baskets filled with purple and green flowers from the opened window, hanging them up on different hooks inside before closing the window. Jaemin didn’t bother announcing himself. Jeno already knew he was there, else he would have called out in a half frightened panic that the shop was closed. Jaemin moved up behind the male, still fumbling with flowers, and wrapped his arms around his waist, pressing a soft kiss to Jeno’s cheek, bringing a delighted smile to Jeno’s face.

“How was work?” he asked.

Jaemin scrunched his nose and blew a playful puff of air on Jeno’s neck, making the male shutter in his arms.

“Long. Those kids don’t listen to a word I say,” Jaemin complained, disdain dripping in his voice.

“You love them though,” Jeno pointed out.

It was true, Jaemin did, but he also sometimes wondered what in the world made him get an education degree for secondary school. Teenagers rarely listened, and when they did, they’d spend hours complaining about whatever lesson or homework was given.

“Well enough about them. How about you and I go get a pizza and watch a movie in your loft,” Jaemin suggested, changing the subject and pressing another kiss to Jeno’s cheek.

“Oh I’ve already eaten,” Jeno replied.

Jaemin pursed his lips. Jaemin always came home from school after tutoring at 6, yet Jeno had always eaten. It was curious, but perhaps the male just preferred eating early.

“One of these days I’m going to catch you before you eat,” Jaemin responded playfully.

Jeno didn’t respond, instead he pulled out of Jaemin’s arms and hung one of the baskets of flowers up on the rafters.

“How about you order a pizza and deliver it here. We’ll go upstairs after it gets here to watch that movie,” Jeno suggested.

Jaemin nodded and moved closer to grab Jeno around the waist lightly. The male squeaked, a small blush blooming to his cheeks as Jaemin leaned close and pressed a soft kiss against his lips.

“Can I stay the night?” he asked.

Jeno’s cheeks flamed redder as he nodded and Jaemin kissed him again.

~

Jaemin’s hand laced through Jeno’s tightly, squeezing the hand his boyfriend had offered him.

“She’s going to be ok,” Jeno whispered, giving a reassuring squeeze to Jaemin’s hand.

Jaemin didn’t respond. His body shook in it’s seat, trembling, his free hand wiping at the tears that rolled down his cheeks.

The moment was inevitable. He knew it was coming one way or another, he just didn’t expect it to be so soon.

The moment the nurse walked down the hallway and into the waiting room where the two boys sat amongst strangers, all tearful for their loved ones, Jeno nudged Jaemin’s side and Jaemin looked up, hot tears still streaking down his face.

“The surgery was a success. Your mother is in recovery,” she said kindly.

A small sob left Jaemin’s lips and Jeno was wrapping his arms around the male. Jaemin buried his face in his boyfriend's neck, basking in the scent of flowers that always seemed to be on his skin. He clung onto Jeno. His mother would live. The surgery a success. The cancer hopefully gone. He’d never been more happy in his life.

“She’s going to be ok, Jae,” Jeno whispered in his ear.

That voice. That beautiful voice in his ear on the day he needed it the most. Tears began falling from Jaemin’s eyes all over again, but this time, it wasn’t the surgery, possibly losing his mother, or the success of the surgery that drove this. This was all Jeno. The beautiful flower boy who had completely captured Jaemin’s heart.

“I love you, Flower” Jaemin whispered against Jeno’s neck through the tears.

He felt Jeno stiffen. That hadn’t said that to one another yet. He hoped it wasn’t too soon. They’d only known each other for four months. Not usually enough time for two people to fall in love, but for Jaemin, he felt as if he’d been in love with Jeno since the day he’d met him.

“I love you too,” Jeno whispered back.

Jaemin took a shuddering breath and opened his mouth to respond when a familiar grunt broke his train of thought. He sighed and slowly loosened his hold on Jeno, letting his arms fall to his sides. Confusion flashed across Jeno’s features, but Jaemin tried not to dwell on it.

“Hi dad, did you hear?” he asked the male standing at the edge of the waiting room.

The man had his arms crossed over his chest, his black suit jacket wrinkling around the sleeves. His face was drawn in a tight line somewhere between a grimmance and a glare.

“I heard. What I didn’t hear was you telling this man that you loved him like a friend.”

The man’s words were deep and harsh. His eyes shot a dirty look toward Jeno and anger welled up in Jaemin’s chest as he saw Jeno crumple beneath the weight of the disapproval.

“That’s probably because I don’t love him like a friend. I’m in love with him,” Jaemin shot back.

He could hear gasps around him from random people watching the scene before them like it was some soap opera.

“Men can’t love men!” the man across the room snarled.

Jeno sat down in the seat, curling in on himself. Jaemin turned to console him, his first priority being his boyfriend, but as an ajumma moved to sit beside him, pulling the tall male against her, rubbing his shaking shoulders, Jaemin felt eased enough to continue the fight, his blood boiling as he watched those precious shoulders move with the weight of tears.

“I can love whoever the fuck I want!” Jaemin snapped.

The eyes of his father narrowed, as if daring Jaemin to repeat himself. Jaemin didn’t care. This man had hurt his Flower. No way was he backing down.

“You have no right to dictate who I can and can’t love! I’m a grown ass adult! I make my own decisions!” Jaemin continued, voice raising in volume.

“Your name is NA Jaemin! That’s MY name! I still get a say!” he father yelled.

Jaemin crossed his arms, copying his father.

“Then maybe I’ll change it to Lee,” he said.

The look on the man’s face, a cross between anger and pain satisfied Jaemin enough to end the argument. “Tell mom I’ll come see her tomorrow,” he said, voice lowered.

He reached down to gently grasp Jeno’s elbow and haul the male up. He didn’t want to disturb him, but at the same time, Jeno was too good to breathe the same air as the homophobic asshole. The ajumma helped him stand and Jaemin shot her a thankful smile before wrapping an arm around Jeno’s waist. Jeno rested his head on Jaemin’s shoulder, tears still streaking his cheeks. Carefully, Jaemin guided him out of the hospital doors, past his still glowering father.

When the made their way out of the hospital, Jaemin sat Jeno down on a bench and knelt in front of him.

“He’s an asshole. Don’t mind him,” he said softly.

Jeno sniffled harshly, trying to bite back his tears but it wasn’t working.

“He’s your father,” he hiccuped.

Jaemin placed a hand on Jeno’s knee and rubbed slowly, soothing circles against the denim.

“I don’t care. If he wants to tell me how I can feel about you, I don’t want to know him,” Jaemin responded.

Jeno didn’t say anything after that. His hiccups and sniffles continued, but Jaemin stroked along his leg softly until finally, they quieted.

“There is nothing he can say that will make me love you any less,” he whispered softly.

This seemed to surprise Jeno enough to make him gape.

“Really?”

Jaemin nodded, a small smile covering his cheeks.

“I’m all yours and you are all mine. I will love you forever and if he doesn’t like that, I’ll take your last night and we won’t deal with him anymore,” he spoke.

The surprise grew even more, and with it, grew a watery smile that made Jaemin’s heart melt on the spot.

“We’re not married, you can’t have my name,” he laughed.

“We could get married.”

To this, Jeno’s response was one of immense shock.

“We’ve only been dating for four months!” he exclaimed.

“And yet I already know you’re the only person I want to spend the rest of my life with,”Jaemin responded, bringing a cute blush to Jeno’s cheeks.

Jeno leaned down and pressed a soft kiss against Jaemin’s lips and, for a moment, Jaemin thought he’d just gotten engaged, at least until Jeno broke the kiss.

“Ask me in a year, and I’ll say yes,” he whispered.

~

Jaemin wasn’t sure he could wait a year to ask for Jeno’s hand. Every day he struggled not to ask, but he wanted to respect the wishes of his Flower. He knew Jeno wasn’t ready. In truth, Jaemin wasn’t either. Despite the argument in the hospital, Jaemin really did seek his father’s approval. That seemed more and more like a distant thought though. It had been four months and Jaemin’s father still said little to him, which made Jaemin want to be around his parents less and less. If it weren’t for his mother, he likely would have blocked them out completely.

“Your father will come around,” the voice of a woman spoke as Jaemin sat beside her on the couch.

“We’re in the middle of March. It’s been over three months since he looked me in the eye!” Jaemin retorted.

His mother simply let out a sigh and patted Jaemin’s knee.

“He just needs time to process everything,” she added.

“To process what? It’s not like telling him I loved Jeno was my coming out to him. Both of you have known I liked guys since I dated that foreign exchange student, Phillipe, in high school.”

“Do you remember how things ended with that boy?” his mother asked, voice still gentle.

“Yeah… he ended up deciding he was straight and dumping me for some girl in his Chemistry class,” Jaemin responded.

“Exactly. Your father and I watched you mope around the house for months after he broke your heart. Your father is just afraid it’s going to happen again. He doesn’t know Jeno like I do. I was able to get to know the boy while I was in the hospital. He has a full time job. He doesn’t know Jeno well enough to know that he is completely and utterly in love with you,” his mother answered again.

Her response made Jaemin gape at her for a moment, memories flashing back through his head. She was right. He’d been a terrified fourteen year old, standing in the living room declaring, through stuttering breaths, that he liked men more than women and that he even had a boyfriend. They both had taken the news surprisingly well. Better than he could have hoped for. Even when he’d brought Phillipe to their house, his parents had been generous hosts and protective parents. Not even allowing the two to go into Jaemin’s room to play video games.

His mother must have seen the realization flash across his face.

“Give him some more time and I’ll work on him. In the meantime, are you serious about wanting to marry this boy?”

Though Jaemin’s mind was reeling, this was one question he could definitely answer.

“I am certain I want to marry him. I want to spend the rest of my life with him. He is the love of my life and no one else will do. No one makes me feel like he makes me feel, and I know he feels the same.”

The smile that crossed his mother’s face was one full of pure pride and happiness.

“Then how about you let me handle your father and you start looking for rings,” she said.

This, again, caught Jaemin off guard for a multitude of reasons, yet he could only express one.

“But he said he didn’t want me to ask him for a year. A year isn’t until November…”

His mother pursed her lips, almost as if she was about to start scolding him.

“Do you know how much time it will take to find the perfect ring? The ring that is ideal for him? Then there’s saving for it. Then it’s finding the perfect moment. Son, it will take you until November or longer to get everything ready to propose to him,” she said.

And she was right. He knew she was. Yet here he was, wasting time.

“But what if I get everything ready, but dad doesn’t approve?” he asked.

Despite his threat to change his name, despite actually being convinced he would do it, he couldn’t. He loved his father dearly. Far too much to get married without the man who’d raised him there.

“He’ll come around when he realizes how serious you two are. Don’t worry. I’ll take care of him,” she answered, and somehow, this put Jaemin at ease.

~

Burgers and water weren't the most romantic things in the world. Actually, it was probably exactly the opposite, but today, they would be romantic.

Time had flown faster than Jaemin could comprehend, and before he knew it, it was standing in front of the flower shop, holding two to-go boxes of burgers and two styrofoam cups of waters, on the exact same day he’d walked into the flower shop for the first time.

The marigolds were the same as they’d been a year ago, alluring enough to draw any passerby in, even if just to admire the beautiful flowers that Jeno put his heart and soul into caring for. The paint had started to fade off the walls of the shop, but somehow, that made the place look even more cozy and appealing. The shop was almost exactly the same as it had been then, except for the few picnic tables Jeno had installed last winter, equipped with umbrella’s like the ones from their first date. Both tables were currently vacant, and the shop sign switched to closed.

Jaemin placed the trays on the table and pushed open the door to the shop, the little bell ringing to alert his presence.

“Flower?” he asked into the jungle of blooming buds.

“I’m upstairs, give me a second,” the voice called from a distance.

Jeno loved flowers. This was news to no one that walked past the shop. But what most didn’t know was that when Jeno had bought the building, it had two floors. The bottom floor was obviously where all of the flowers were kept. The top floor Jeno had slowly turned into a small little apartment loft that he loved so dearly. Dearly enough to deny all of Jaemin’s attempts at getting him to move into a real apartment where the two could comfortably live together.

“You don’t have to get dolled up for me, Flower. You’re beautiful enough as it is,” Jaemin called up.

He couldn’t see his boyfriend, but he knew the male was blushing. He could almost hear it.

Jaemin waited by the door of the shop, casting glances back at their food to ensure no birds attempted to steal from the trays. When he heard the stairs creak with the weight of a human, his attention was immediately snagged however and he was drawn back to watch as Jeno’s form appeared at the bottom of the staircase.

Jaemin’s draw dropped. Jeno was wearing a pair of skinny jeans with a few sensible rips in them, paired with a shirt that was much too big, a shirt that came down past the middle of his thigh and hung loosely on his shoulders. His hair had been bleached and was now styled in a fluffy mess of blonde hair on top of his hair.

Jaemin’s breath caught in his throat.

“Do you like it?” Jeno asked timidly.

Jaemin didn’t respond. Instead, he left the door to the shop slam closed, forgetting the food waiting outside. He made his way quickly to Jeno, reaching up to grasp the males waist and shoving him against the wall before planting a firm kiss against his lips.

“I love it,” he whispered before diving back in for more.

Jaemin carefully tugged the sheets up over both bodies, shielding them both from the cool air of Jeno’s fan.

“We should go downstairs to eat soon. I’m sure our food is cold by now,” he muttered, wrapping his arms around Jeno’s waist and pulling him closer.

“I’m not really hungry,” Jeno answered, snuggling his face into Jaemin’s neck.

“You need to eat something. We just burned a lot of calories,” Jaemin responded.

Jeno shook his head.

“I can’t eat. I’m not hungry. I won’t be able to eat anything without feeling sick,” he responded.

Jaemin gave the male an odd look.

“Well you’ve got to eat something. Like I said, we just burned through a lot of calories. I know your body isn’t hungry right now after that exertion, but you need to replenish those calories. You’re as thin as a rail already.”

He felt Jeno’s breath on his neck.

“Can we take a small nap first and then eat?” he requested, voice sounding already lidded with sleep.

Jaemin’s heart melted. He loved watching Jeno fall asleep. He loved holding him in his arms. Besides, how could he say no when the male was acting so cute.

“Fine, but when we wake up, we’re both getting some food,” Jaemin said sternly.

If only he had remembered to hold Jeno to that.

~

November came around again faster than Jaemin could comprehend. His mother had been right in that regard, but there had still been no such luck on getting his father’s approval.

It had been a work in progress. At least the man was saying more than a few words to him, but the look of contempt in his eyes whenever he looked at Jaemin threatened to tear him to pieces.

“Did you get it?” his mother asked, sitting down at the kitchen table with two steaming cups of coffee.

Jaemin nodded and pulled the compact velvet box out of his back pocket.

He wasn’t delusional. He knew there wouldn’t be a literal marriage between himself and Jeno. There would be no legal binding. However, the ceremony was still important to Jeno and whether it was accepted and documented by the country or not, he would still classify Jeno as his husband, and that’s all he wanted.

He placed the velvet box on the table and slowly popped the lid open to show her the stunning diamond ring cut like a rose on a silver band. The diamond was small and sensible. Something he knew Jeno would like. Around it were a few tiny green emeralds that gave the illusion of petals. It was a ring he’d found in one of the last jewelry shops he’d looked in, one on the other side of town that didn’t seem like it would have anything suitable, but Jaemin had taken a chance anyways. After finding the ring, he was quick to start paying on it and within a month, he finally had it sealed away in his pocket, ready for the day he’d get to present it to the male he hoped to soon be planning a wedding with.

“Sweetheart!” his mother gaped. “It’s beautiful! He’s going to love it!” she gushed.

A small blush tinted Jaemin’s cheeks as he let his mind wander to how Jeno would when he was presented with the ring. Would he blush? Would he cry? Would he jump into Jaemin’s arms with a gleeful shout? Hopefully all of the above.

“You’re serious about this, aren’t you?” a masculine voice asked.

Jaemin looked up in shock. He hadn’t realized his father had been home. He also didn’t expect the male to regard him in the soft tone he was now.

“I am,” he responded, throat going dry.

He didn’t want to argue. All he wanted was to rush over to the flower shop and propose now, but how could he, knowing the man he looked up to didn’t approve, and would possibly never approve.

“And he feels the same? He honestly loves you too?” the male asked.

That was… very unexpected, but Jaemin didn’t hesitate to answer.

“He does. I know he does,” Jaemin answered.

He was getting hopeful now. This was as sincere as his father had been in a year on the topic of Jeno.

“Then go ask for his hand in marriage. But you better promise me that you’ll both take care of each other,” the man spoke, surprising Jaemin so much he was almost speechless.

He stared up at the man in shock, gaping at him with an open mouth before his mother clapping her hands on the table, startled him from his stupor an he was flying out of his chair.

“Thank you dad!” he cried, but didn’t stop for a hug.

He needed to see Jenone now.

Except… he wasn’t prepared for the sight that met him when he got to the flower shop…

As soon as he walked inside, the shop, he knew something was wrong. There was a group of people surrounding the door, all with worry etched over their faces. Nearby was an ambulance with flashing lights and silenced sirens and, for a moment, Jaemin looked around for any clues as to where Jeno was and who was hurt. That moment halted, however, the second two paramedics walked out rolling a gurney… with Jeno strapped to the bed, his head bleeding and an oxygen mask over his face.

“Jeno!” Jaemin cried, rushing toward the bed. “Jeno!” he cried again, tears welling in his eyes.

“Step back sir!” one of the paramedics snapped at him.

“That’s my boyfriend!” Jaemin cried out, reaching out to grab Jeno’s hand, only to find it ice cold.

He hissed. How long had his boyfriend been bleeding from his head before someone found him?!

“Sir, I asked you to step back! You’re no help to him keeping him from the hospital!” one of the paramedics yelled.

This seemed to snap Jaemin out of his stupor enough to jump back and allow the paramedics to load the unconscious male into the ambulance and leave with roaring sirens toward the hospital down the road.

“What… what happened…” Jaemin mumbled to no one in particular.

“I came in and found him passed out. It looked like he’d fainted and fallen on a ceramic pot that shattered all over the floor. I have no idea how long he was like that. There was a very scary puddle of blood around him,” one girl responded weakly.

When Jaemin looked up to find her face, he noted how sick she looked. Seeing all that blood had no doubt frightened her. But he didn’t have much time or energy to worry about that.

“Thank you for finding him,” he got out before dashing off in the direction the ambulance had taken.

The hospital wasn’t far from the flower shop. It was how he and Jeno had met a year and a half ago.

As his feet hit the sidewalk, breath coming out hard and fast, heart racing in anxiety, one thought plagued his mind.

Why had Jeno fainted in the first place?

“... Anorexia?” Jaemin repeated back, his mouth forming the word, but his brain being unable to process the meaning.

“It would appear that Mr. Lee has been suffering from anorexia for a very long time. Well over a year at least. He seems to have been eating just enough to get by, but his body was severely deprived of the nutrients it needed. It would appear that lately he’d been eating even less and it resulted in him fainting. Under normal circumstances, giving him an IV with sugar water and a psych consult would have gotten him back to health. However, with the severity of the eating disorder and the head trauma, this is not a normal circumstance,” the doctor explained, standing in front of Jaemin in the waiting room.

Jaemin’s parents stood on either side of their son, both of their faces etched with worry.

“What are you saying?” Jaemin sniffled.

The doctor sighed and placed her hand on Jaemin’s shoulder. “I’m sorry Mr. Na. Your boyfriend didn’t make it.”

Jaemin’s heart shattered like a glass vase suddenly being dropped onto the floor, shattering into a million tiny pieces that would make it impossible to put together again.

How had he not noticed how sick his boyfriend had been. They’d been together for over a year, and Jaemin had never seen him eat once. How had he not realized?!

His legs buckled and his knees hit the ground as a loud, screaming sob of his boyfriends name left his lips.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

One Year Later

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So my students decided to test my patience today and try talking back to me, and as a result, I ended up getting sent home for screaming at them,” Jaemin said as he sat down on the well-kept grass.

“The school didn’t mind. They know why it happened. It’s sad that I have that leniency though, especially around this time of year,” he continued.

A tear welled up in his eye. One that he let slide down his cheek without a bother.

“Happy anniversary, by the way,” he added, another tear falling as he turned his gaze to look at the dark gray gravestone with “Lee Jeno” carved into the stone slab.

“I brought you your flowers. Lilacs. Your favorites,” he added.

Lilacs were Jeno’s favorites, so despite bringing flowers every day he came, Lilacs were reserved for special occasions. Holidays, his birthday, or the day that should have been the happiest day of their lives.

With shaking hands, he carefully removed the roses from the flower vases on both sides of the grave. He placed them off to the side, where they would stay until the grounds keeper disposed of them because Jaemin just didn’t have the heart to do it.

Once the roses were removed, he gingerly placed the lilacs in the vases and let more of the tears fall, watering the flowers cut at the stems.

“I miss you so much Flower! I wish you had told me about your sickness and let me help you. I wish I had realized it before it was too late. But now you’re gone, and there’s nothing I can do to bring you back,” he spoke, shoulders beginning to shake as the tears flowed heavier.

“If you would have waited thirty more minutes we wouldn’t be here!! You would be my husband! We’d be living happily together! I was going to propose you idiot! Why did you have to leave me?!” Jaemin’s voice raised in volume as tears racked his body.

His hands cupped around his face as he sobbed loud and noisily, tears dropping onto the soil beneath his feet.

“All I want to do is hug you or kiss you one more time. Just once more,” he mumbled into his hands as his sobs quieted.

He sat there for about an hour, not saying anything, just sitting on his knees, letting the breeze ruffle his hair as tears continued flowing silently now down his cheeks. He had so much to say, but his words would never be heard by the ears he longed to whisper into again.

After a while, Jaemin took a long, shaky breath and reached into his pocket.

“I’ve been holding onto this since the day you… died… I keep meaning to give it to you. It’s yours after all, or at least meant for you. I just… I haven’t been able to part with it. But I can’t keep it any longer,” he spoke, voice wavering as a few more tears fell.

He opened up the velvet box to expose the ring that hadn’t been touched since that fateful day.

“I love you my Flower. I always have and I always will. And even though you're gone now, I will always view you as my only true love. I hope that, had you still been alive, you would have said yes,” he continued, voice quieting to a whisper.

Carefully, he plucked the ring from the velvet box and dug his hand into the soft grass. Moving slowly, he dug a hole with his fingers right over where Jeno’s heart would be in the dirt. Once the hole was deep enough it wouldn’t be exposed by the lawnmower, he placed the silver-banded engagement ring into the dirt.

Working carefully, he moved the dirt he’d dug up back over the ring and patted it down to seal it into the ground forever with his love.

“My Flower… Will you marry me?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Alt. Ending

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“... Anorexia?” Jaemin repeated back, his mouth forming the word, but his brain being unable to process the meaning.

“It would appear that Mr. Lee has been suffering from anorexia for a very long time. Well over a year at least. He seems to have been eating just enough to get by, but his body was severely deprived of the nutrients it needed. It would appear that lately he’d been eating even less and it resulted in him fainting. Under normal circumstances, giving him an IV with sugar water and a psych consult would have gotten him back to health. However, with the severity of the eating disorder and the head trauma, this is not a normal circumstance,” the doctor explained, standing in front of Jaemin in the waiting room.

Jaemin’s parents stood on either side of their son, both of their faces etched with worry.

“What are you saying?” Jaemin sniffled.

“He doesn’t need to be left alone. We were able to get enough nutrients into him, this time, but next time, he won’t be so lucky. He’ll be signed up for rehabilitation classes and counseling sessions, but it’s his choice to go or not. Someone is going to have to get him to go,” the doctor said.

Jaemin felt the weight on his heart lesson. Jeno was going to be ok… This time at least.

“Can I see him?” Jaemin asked timidly.

The doctor nodded, a small smile playing on his lips.

“He’s weak, but he’s awake,” he said.

Jaemin nodded, a stray tear falling down his cheek as he followed the doctor down a few hallways until he stopped at a closed door and gestured for Jaemin to enter. Jaemin walked through the door shakily. He closed it gently behind him and moved further into the room. When he laid eyes on Jeno, his heart broke, but pieced itself together when Jeno smiled.

“Hey Jaemin…” Jeno’s voice was weak.

Jaemin gave him a watery smile.

“Hey Flower… are you alright?” he asked.

Jeno gave a weak smile but nodded as Jaemin moved around the hospital bed and took a seat.

“Then… HOW COULD YOU NOT TELL ME YOU WEREN’T EATING?!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

One Year Later

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jaemin stood proudly at the alter on the private beach his parents had rented out. He was dressed in an expensive black suit with a flower pinned to the coat’s breast pocket. His hands were folded neatly in front of him.

“Breathe Jaemin,” his mother’s whispered voice came, forcing Jaemin to realize he hadn’t inhaled in several seconds and was close to passing out.

He took a deep breath, chest rising and falling as he did so, seconds before the music from the organ began playing. His heart stopped.

The audience in little white chairs stood up as the tent at the end of the walkway of flowers opened and Jeno, dressed in a white suit sprang forth, a bouquet of lilacs tucked in his hands.

Slowly, the male made his way down the aisle until he reached Jaemin. Jaemin kept his eyes locked on the taller man, his heart beginning to race.

When Jeno reached the altar, Jaemin took hold of his hands gently and the man standing in front of them facing the crowd cleared his throat.

“Jaemin and Jeno have decided that, although marriage is not legal in Korea, they would like to hold this ceremony as a symbol of their love for one another and for their relationship deeper than dating. Is there anyone against this joining of hands?” the man asked.

Jaemin didn’t care to look out on the crowd. Their opinions didn’t matter as long as he and his Flower were happy.

When no one responded, the man went on.

“Hearing no objections, may anyone with ill will toward these two men forever hold their peace.”

Jaemin smiled softly at Jeno before looking up as the ring he would place on Jeno’s finger was placed in his hand by his mother.

“Na Jaemin. Do you take Lee Jeno to be your unlawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, as long as you both shall live?”

“I do.”

[moonlit-imagines]

A Bug’s Life

Peter Parker x Lang!reader

warnings:

a/n: i love this concept and also anon u r sweet and i just found out theres a marvel supervillainess named dragonfly but since i havent heard of her until today im using that name!

prompt: anonymous: “Can you please write a Tom Holland!Peter Parker x Female!Reader where the reader is the older sister of Cassie Lang (Antman’s daughter) and her and Peter fall in love with each other. ✨ Thanks so much! 😘”

Okay, so when you were a kid, you had always dreamed of being a superhero. You never thought you’d know your idols personally, though. You see, when your dad, Scott Lang, came back from prison, a lot changed. Suddenly, he was a superhero and no matter how much he didn’t like it, you wanted to be apart of it.

“Y/N, no, please. You’re just a kid!” You dad argued with you in the presence of your “uncles.”

“Scotty, I think it’d be good for her, you know? Like, she’s so smart and she’s got a lot of talent! I think she could learn a thing or two from Hope and Dr. Pym, right?” Uncle Luis egged on.

“Yeah, dad! Me and Hope have already been experimenting with some stuff and, I mean, Mom’s been bugging me over getting into some extracurriculars...” You reasoned with him.

“Yeah, y/n, like photography club or soccer, not being a crime-fighting bug!” Scott pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed, but when he looked back up, you were giving him puppy eyes. “Don’t...don’t do that.”

“Please, dad? I just wanna follow in your footsteps. You’re my hero.” You pouted your lip and didn’t break eye contact with him until he let out a load groan.

“Your mom is going to kill me.” He mumbled while you celebrated with Luis.

You became known as Dragonfly, Ant-Man and Wasp’s sidekick partner. It wasn’t long before you were affiliated with the Avengers and other heroes from across the galaxy.

The first time you stepped foot into the Avengers Compound was unbelievable.

“If only I could tell eight-year-old me how cool she’d grow up to be...” You whispered as your dad led you through the place. You were specifically requested for recruitment following a backround check that proved that you were qualified to train as a junior scientist! The program had just been started thanks to the young Spider-Man, one of the many heroes you had met before and would actually get to know after today.

“Alright, kiddo, it’s not too late to back out.” Your dad told you.

“It’s gonna be fine, dad! You know you can visit me anytime and I’ll come to see you and Cassie every chance I can get.” You gave him a warm smile to let him know it’s alright.

“I know...I’m just gonna miss you, you know?” He shrugged, but before the conversation could continue, you were greeted by Bruce Banner, aka the Hulk.

“Welcome! Nice to see you again, Scott.” Bruce shook your dad’s hand, then turned to you. “And it’s wonderful to finally meet the girl behind the mask.” He shook your hand.

“Nice to meet you, too, Doctor Banner.” You fit your small hand into his abnormally large (and green) hand.

“I’ve heard great things about you, Y/N. I’m excited to see your talent up close.” Dr. Banner chuckled. “I told Peter to meet us here, he probably forgot.” He walked to the wall and pressed the speaker button to the intercom. “Peter, can you meet us at the South Entrance?”

Moments later, a teenage boy came barrelling towards the three of you.

“Sorry! Sorry I’m late.” He apologized profusely. You giggled at the disheveled appearance of him. His hair was sticking up in the back and his flannel was half-tucked into his pants. “I’m Peter!” He stuck his hand out for you to shake. “Peter Parker. Spider-Man.” You took his hand gladly and shook it.

“Y/N Lang. Dragonfly.” You introduced yourself. “It’s been a while since we’ve fought together.” You pointed out. “Maybe that’s a good thing.” Peter’s eyes furrowed at that comment. “You know, not fighting.” You added.

“Oh, yeah, definitely!” Peter agreed.

“So, let me guess: you overslept?” You referenced Peter’s bold look and he quickly fixed anything noticeably wrong to him. Bruce and your dad were just observing the chemistry between you and Peter, exchanging entertained glances.

“Hi! I’m y/n’s dad, Scott. Ant-Man.” Scott interrupted as he waved to Peter.

“Oh! I remember you. You got really big in Germany and I had to web your knees until you fell down.” Peter brought up old memories and you covered your mouth to stop from laughing.

“Yep! That’s me.” Scott eyes got slightly wider. “So, I really wish I could stay, but I have a meeting with a client tomorrow morning that I can’t miss. Alarm company doesn’t run itself, you know?” Silence. “Anyways, uh, y/n.” He motioned you a bit closer so you could say goodbye. He crouched down and grabbed both your shoulders. “I love you so much and I am super proud of you. This is an awesome opportunity, kiddo!”

“Yeah, I know.” You said in a sort of disappointed tone.

“What’s wrong?” Scott asked.

“I’m just gonna miss you.” You frowned.

“Come here.” Your dad pulled you into a tight hug. “I’m gonna miss you, too.” The hug lasted at least sixty seconds before he pulled away and kissed your forehead. “Okay, now here’s your bag, go do some science!” He gave you your suitcase. “I love you, Pumkin.”

“Love you, too, dad.” You smiled, almost holding back tears. You really didn’t want to say goodbye to him, but it’s apart of life. Scott watched as you, Peter, and Banner walked down the halls of the Compound. Bruce and Peter were showing you your new room!

“What’s crime like on the West Coast?” Peter asked you. “I’ve only fought crime on the East Coast. And Europe. And Space.”

“Crime is the same coast to coast. It’s crime.” You shrugged.

“Well, that’s cool. Sorry, I’m not good at small talk.” He chuckled.

“Peter, you’ll be able to show y/n her room and give her a little tour, right?” Bruce asked as he slowed down.

“Yeah, no problem.” Peter nodded.

“Alright, great. I’ll be in the lab if anyone needs me.” Bruce walked away and left the two of you to it.

“Okie doke.” Peter clapped his hands together. “Well, this is the hallway.” Is exactly how he just began the tour. The Compound was actually, surprisingly, bigger than you expected. “And that’s the training room, there’s the kitchen, your room has it’s own bathroom, but there are other bathrooms all over the place. There’s a shopping list on the fridge if you ever have any requests, but fruit snacks are banned since I ate two full boxes in one day and threw up.” Peter gave that wonderful anecdote.

“Wow, that’s...impressive?” You tried to come up with something.

“I think the word you’re looking for is ‘disgusting.’” Peter and you shared a laugh as you approached your new room. He opened the door up and you stepped into the biggest bedroom you’d ever seen. “It’s taken some getting used to, you know, the big room, the big bed, the huge bathroom, all of it.”

“This is amazing.” You mumbled.

“Yeah! And Bruce said we can go shopping and decorate the room any way you’d like. I just got my license, so I’d be cool with driving.” Peter proposed.

“Yeah, I think that’d be pretty cool.” You agreed as you threw your suitcase onto the bed and started unpacking. “Uh, I’m kind of hungry...know any places to eat around here?” You started putting shirts on hangers and filling up your huge closet. You noticed Peter hadn’t answered your question yet, so you turned around to see what he was stalling for. He was just watching you. “Am I really that interesting?” You joked.

“What?” Peter blinked. “Oh! Yeah, sorry, yeah, there’s a few places around that we can go to. Assuming you’d want my company, of course. It’s your choice, really.” Peter rambled and you approached him.

“Duh, I gotta get to know my housemate better!” You pulled Peter out of the room and in a random direction. “Am I going the right way to the garage?”

“No.” He answered and you quickly changed directions. You were oddly comfortable with Peter already, and he wasn’t exactly against it. You were super sweet to him and you two have a lot of shared experience. Teen heroes trying to make a difference. And bug-themed.

Peter drove you to his favorite (and closest) restaurant for dinner, and on the way, he played his music on the playlist. Left Hand Free by Alt-J played through the speakers as you sang along.

“You like this song?” He asked and you nodded without a pause in singing. “Good, so do I. You have a really good voice.” He complimented, which definitely made you blush.

“Thanks, now sing with me!” You nudged his arm leaning on the console and resumed your singing.

“I don’t really sing.” Peter chuckled and saw you roll your eyes, then sighed. “Fine. You win.” He began to join you in song.

Well your left hand’s free, and your right’s in grip. With another left hand watch his right hand slip towards his gun, woah woah woah...

“You’re not too bad, yourself, Peter.” You told him as he pulled into a parking spot at the restaurant. The two of you walked in together and the waitress immediately recognized Peter.

“Hey there, Peter! Good to see you!” She greeted and grabbed two menus. “I see you’ve brought a date.” She raised her eyebrows and smirked.

“Oh, uh, she’s not—” Peter stuttered before you took over.

“Yep, it’s our first date! I’m y/n.” You introduced yourself.

“Well, it’s nice to see him with someone. Follow me, you two.” She let you over to a table and told you she’d be back for drinks in a minute. As soon as she left, Peter turned to you.

“When were you going to tell me this was a date?” Peter cocked an eyebrow with a crooked smile to match it.

“I’m sorry! I hope it’s okay I told her that.” You innocently replied.

“It’s more than okay.” Peter leaned forward. “I’m happy to be your date. We are moving a bit fast, though.”

“Are you sure? This is actually pretty slow for people our age. By now, they’d probably be confessing their love for one another.” You joked and he rolled his eyes.

“You are so right!” He snorted. “Jeez, it’s been so long since I’ve talked to someone my own age!” He sighed. “What about you?”

“I hang out with adults all day long. The only kid I hang out with is my little sister. Do you have any siblings?” You asked him.

“Only child.” Peter answered. “What’s your sister’s name?”

“Cassie. She’s sweet but it’s kind of weird coming back after the Blip and seeing her all big and everything.” You made random hand gestures to demonstrate that she was bigger.

“I know, right! I have classmates that I saw as infants that are now bigger than me!” He explained. The waitress came back and got you your drinks and took each of your orders. Back to the chit-chat. “Okay, now tell me, what got you into the hero-game?”

“Okay, well, my dad had just gotten out of prison, right?” That sentence itself made Peter choke on his drink. “Oh, calm down, it was a non-violent offense. He actually exposed corruption, that’s why I look up to him.” You explained.

“That’s good, that’s good. I’m glad. Go on.” He took another sip from his drink.

“Yeah, so then he robbed Hank Pym, who actually wanted my dad to rob him, then a bunch of ants broke my dad out of jail after he got arrested again for stealing from Dr. Pym, then my dad became the new Ant-Man and took down some bad guys, his new girlfriend, Hope, who is Dr. Pym’s daughter, took a liking to me and started showing me the ropes, so me and my Uncle Luis convinced my dad to let me make my own suit. Then Dragonfly was born.” You explained in full detail. “What about you?”

“Oh, yeah. Well, I got bit by a radioactive spider that was being experimented on in a lab, then I had a short-lived wrestling career, then my uncle who raised me died and I became Spider-Man.” He smiled and your jaw dropped.

“Holy shit, are you okay?” You asked.

“Oh, yeah, I’m good.” He admitted as you guys recieved your food. “So, anything else I should know about you?”

“I dunno.” You shrugged. “I like Star Wars.” You told him.

“Me too!” Peter exclaimed.

“No, you don’t. My dad told me Spider-Man called AT-AT’s ‘walking-thingies.’” You shook your head and laughed at the thought of that.

“Okay, so I’m not a huge fan, but our next date can be a Star Wars marathon?” Peter proposed.

“Yes!” You agreed a bit too enthusiastically. Peter smiled and the waitress brought an ice cream sundae with two spoons to the table.

“It’s on the house.” She told you two with a wink.

“Looks like we’re sharing.” You grabbed a spoon and got to work. Peter got chocolate all over his chin. He was kind of a messy eater. “You’ve got a little something...” You grabbed a napkin and wiped his chin clean.

“Thanks.” Peter picked his spoon up and moved it towards you. “Have you tried any of the brownie yet?” You took a bite of what he offered.

“Wow, that’s amazing.” You spoke through your mouthful.

“I hate to brag, but I make a pretty mean batch of brownies.” Peter bragged.

“You’re gonna have to prove it, Pete.” You wiped your face off and cleaned up your spot a bit. “You ready to get back to the Compound?”

“Yeah, yeah, let’s get going.” Peter left some cash on the table to pay the bill and walked you out to the car. The car ride back was filled with jokes and even more stories about your super-adventures. “So, you’re telling me that the first time you shrank, you cried?”

“Yes! Dude, it was an emotional experience. I’m telling you, I was not prepared for something so cool.” You defended yourself. “Now tell me something embarrassing about your powers.”

“I got stuck to a bathroom stall at school and they thought I was skipping class so they sent an aide and I was crying out of fear.” He admitted with pity in his voice.

“Oh, my god. That’s awful.” You giggled and grabbed his hand. “Have you recovered yet?”

“No, unfortunately not, but the handholding sure does help.” Peter squeezed your hand tighter.

“I’m glad.” You smugly replied and closed your eyes to listen to the music. You were kind of exhausted from traveling, so you knew you’d pass out the moment you hit your bed. Soon, you arrived at the Compound and Peter kissed your cheek to get you up.

“We’re hoooome.” He said in a singsong voice as your eyes fluttered open. “Sorry, that was weird.” He apologized, but you grabbed his face and pulled him in for a long kiss. More like a brief makeout, but potato, poe-tah-toe.

“You’re really cute, you know?”

[shemakesmusic-uk]

Texan-born, Brooklyn-based singer-songwriter and TikTok personality Allison Ponthier makes a splash with 'Cowboy' – it's the enthralling first taste of her upcoming EP. Finding a path away from her conservative upbringing, queer singer-songwriter Allison Ponthier is another artist making country music her own. Taking references from Kacey Musgraves and Orville Peck, Ponthier's take on the genre is high camp and features a kaleidoscopic visual world too. Growing a huge following on TikTok, 'Cowboy' marks the start of a whole new chapter for Ponthier with her debut release with Interscope and Polydor. The track itself references her move from the bible belt to New York City and her journey accepting her sexuality. Warm and inviting 'Cowboy' is cinematic pop with some real heart-on-sleeve confessional songwriting. Complete with a masterful music video that runs like a mini-movie complete with impressive special effects, on reflection, cinematic is an understatement. The video itself is a striking and exciting introduction to this new artist, “I probably watch movies more than I listen to music,” Ponthier says of the video. The clip, directed by Jordan Bahat (Christine and the Queens) adds a whole new cosmic energy to the track and aims to amplify the lyrics' detailed storytelling. As she unveils more of her forthcoming debut EP, Ponthier explains what we can expect from her; “a lot of my songs are about being uncomfortable in your own skin but getting to know yourself better, figuring out who you really are.” [via the Line Of Best Fit]

Miley Cyrus has shared the full video for 'Angels Like You'. The pop rebel returned in 2020 with her excellent album Plastic Hearts, a series of superb empowerment anthems. Album highlight 'Angels Like You' has received the video treatment, shot at the Superbowl in front of an audience of fully vaccinated healthcare workers. Miley has also provided a note for the video describing her feelings of gratitude to these workers. [via Clash]

LA punk four-piece The Paranoyds have dropped a new video for track 'Egg Salad', taken from their album Carnage Bargain which is out now on Suicide Squeeze. The video's director Nicole Stunwyck comments "The video presents the glitzy & glamorous world of a teenage girl who, after accidentally catching a beauty pageant on TV, dreams of her rise to stardom & subsequent downfall... It’s not a commentary on anything but an experimental depiction of my own personal fascination for young tragic starlets alà Valley of The Dolls."

Noga Erez and collaborative partner ROUSSO have shared a fifth compelling new single from forthcoming album KIDS which is set for release on March 26 via City Slang. 'Story' is a snappy, addictive song about how couples relationships are always a relationship between two people’s past and present. "Everyone brings their past experiences to the relationship even if things are great" Erez comments. "Sometimes past situations come in and take over." As with the album's previous singles 'Story' is brought to life with a captivating video, starring Erez and ROUSSO, who also provides vocals on the track. "ROUSSO is my partner in music as well as my partner in life" she explains. "This is the first time we tell a story about our relationship in a song and video. It’s a song about a couple fighting and how, in that situation, sometimes what you hear the other person say is not what they actually said. The making of this video was a 10-day couples therapy session for us. As we rehearsed the pretend fighting and martial arts moves we knew that, at times, one of us would get punched just a little too hard. It was so intense and interesting to live in this world, where our relationship comes alive in the most physical way."

After announcing Detritus with lead outing 'Stories' last month, Sarah Neufeld has unveiled the album's second single 'With Love and Blindness'. Neufeld says of the song and Jason Last-directed video, "The video for 'With Love and Blindness' came together through a long-time collaboration between myself and videographer Jason Last. I knew that Jason and I would work together again on some visual aspect for my third solo release, and it so happened that before I even began recording the album, we were presented with the opportunity to do a mini residence on Corsica with Providenza; an amazing collective with a farm, cultural laboratory, festival and residency program." She continues, "I was doing a short solo tour in Europe in the summer of 2019 in order to re-work some of the pieces from the dance collaboration to begin to find a shape for the album that was to be recorded in the Fall. In the middle of that tour, Jason and I travelled to Corsica for several days (graced once again with a suitcase containing Esteban Cortazar’s unique and beautiful creations). Besides performing in Providenza’s outdoor amphitheater, we were immersed in nature, literally staying in a treehouse perched on the side of a mountain, overlooking the dramatic coastline." Neufeld adds, "I found that the pulse of the landscape resonated with the essence of the music, especially "With Love and Blindness"; a sense of rawness, of sensuality, of a strange gravity intensified by the hypnotic summer heat and the general otherworldliness of the place." [via the Line Of Best Fit]

Molly Burman was brought up around music. At every family event, every party, the soundtrack would resonate with her, providing an education in itself. Both parents were gigging musicians, and she always wanted to follow in their footsteps, to use performance as a means of self-expression. Lockdown brought the time and space to bring these ideas into focus, and she's working to unveil a series of one off singles. Her debut single proper 'Fool Me With Flattery' is out now, a blissfully melodic piece of indie pop with some whip-smart lyricism. There's a tongue in cheek element to her sound that is fantastically endearing, matched by the subtle lo-fi elements of her bedroom pop confection. She comments: "I wrote the song after a long day of feeling overlooked and ignored by some of the guys in my life. I was fed up, angry and used the stereotype of a mansplaining misogynist to let it all out. This song is for anyone who feels belittled and like they’re being made to shrink themselves; be as big as you possibly can, and don’t let anyone fool you with flattery." The video is a hilarious showcase for Molly's offbeat sense of humour. [via Clash]

Punk provocateurs Pussy Riot have unveiled their latest song 'Panic Attack', as well as a music video that features a hologram of singer Nadya Tolokonnikova. This is the final release from Pussy Riot’s new Panic Attack EP, a collection of three linked songs that, for now, can only be streamed as separate singles. The title track features punk guitars underneath a tinkling music box melody, as Tolokonnikova turns anxiety into a sports cheer. “Gimme an A,” she says, “Gimme a T/ Gimme a T/ Gimme an A/ Gimme a C/ Gimme a K/ Okay? Okay.” While upbeat and seemingly cheerful, the synth-punk song comes out of the trauma she experienced in a Russian prison camp. As she explained in a statement, “After serving 2 years in a labor camp, I’m still struggling with mental health issues. Trauma, fear and insecurity never fully go away, causing depression episodes and deep anxiety. ‘PANIC ATTACK’ was born as the result of me staring at the wall for 24 hours in the middle of the pandemic, feeling 100% helpless. I was trying to write something uplifting to encourage people to get through the tough times. But I was just failing and failing. Magically, at the second I allowed myself to be honest and write about despair I was experiencing, I wrote the track in like a half an hour. Depression is a plague of the 21st century, and it tells me that there’s something broken in the way we treat each other. The video ‘PANIC ATTACK’ reflects on objectification of human beings, loneliness, disconnection from the environment that causes us to feel small and powerless. And it’s us who caused it with our own hands – that’s why in the end of the video I’m fighting with my own clone.” The music video for 'Panic Attack' was directed by  Asad J. Malik. He used 106 cameras to capture all angles of Tolokonnikova, then converted that information into a photoreal hologram. Afterwards, Tokyo-based creative technologist Ruben Fro built out landscapes reminiscent of video games through which the virtual Tolokonnikova could frolic. But as the visuals progress, those idyllic settings give way to a hellscape, and the singer faces off against a clone of herself. [via Consequence of Sound]

The wait is finally over. BLACKPINK’s Rosé shines like the star she is with her official solo debut. On Friday, she released two solo songs on her debut single album titled R, 'On the Ground' and 'Gone.' With its deep lyrics, angelic bridge, and Rosé’s high note at the end, 'On the Ground' is an exemplary song for her solo debut. Add the fact that Rosé is credited as a writer for the song, and one can really tell how much time she spent perfecting it for release. The accompanying music video, meanwhile, expands the story of life and growth. Rosé starts off looking lost and trying to find herself amidst all the wildness of life; she eventually encounters past and present versions of herself while searching for answers and purpose. By the end, she finds herself and her path forward, and one can’t help but smile as she sings an explosive outro. [via Teen Vogue]

On Ellise's latest alt-pop concoction the rising pop star gets gothic as 'Feeling Something Bad...' transforms a crush into an obsession. An expert at catastrophising everyday experiences, the LA-based artist has arrived fully formed with not only a consistent and cohesive sound but a striking visual identity too. That's even more clear when you press play on the accompanying video for her latest infectiously catchy track. With the clip directed by Joakim Carlsson we get to see Ellise in her absolute element as she brings "Feeling Something Bad..." to life in a macabre world of its own. “I just love dramatising little everyday feelings in life, so this is my big dramatic ‘I have a crush on you’ song,” Ellise explains – it's a song she wrote about a boy she barely knew. [via the Line Of Best Fit]

With President Biden determined to get the majority of American adults vaccinated by summer, bands are earnestly beginning to look forward to the return of live music. Purity Ring are the latest to announce 2021 tour dates, which they’ve shared alongside the video for their track 'sinew'. The song comes from WOMB, the synth-pop duo’s first album in five years that was released just before the pandemic struck. Directed by Toby Stretch, the clip brings back the abstract graphics and costumes that featured in the 'stardew' music video, continuing the enigmatic story of the domed bicyclist and their sun-headed sidecar companion. [via Consequence of Sound]

Australian Pop Princess, Peach PRC releases the official music video for her debut single 'Josh'. Peach PRC comments on the official 'Josh' visuals, “The music video was inspired by growing up watching the same five infomercials, morning news channels and old movies on my little pink box tv when I was a kid and couldn’t sleep on a school night. The idea was to have “josh” feel just as harassed the more he tries to call. Every creative step along the way was entirely my vision, from writing the music video script, to the lyrics and everything in between. I’m so happy and hope all the girls, gays and theys who dated “josh” will sing along.”

[nyadversary]

30 questions meme thingie... tagged by @autumnalserenade sort of ehehehe

(1.) name / nickname:

kester / kes

(2.) gender:

oh haha no thank you :)

sometimes i think about how im both a transgender bisexual and a bigender transsexual and how thats so epic of me

(3.) star sign:

aries but i think astrology is stoopid i don’t like it. watch as that turns out to be an aries stereotype or something though

(4.) height:

5′9

(5.) time:

6:37 am EST

(6.) birthday:

04/17

(7.) favorite bands/groups:

oh fuck i’m definitely going to forget something important but

mother mother, metric, the decemberists, alt-j, echo & the bunnymen, x, pixies, hole, nirvana, clipping., my chemical romance, blondie, mindless self indulgence, studio killers

(8.) favorite solo artist:

again i’m definitely gonna forget someone important here

emilie autumn, amanda palmer, fiona apple, patti smith, marina & the diamonds, yungblud, poppy, slayyyter, hozier, mika

(9.) song stuck in my head:

i’m so sorry to have to say this but. dr3 despair arc ending theme

(10.) last movie:

genuinely no idea. i try not to watch movies if i can help it

(11.) last show:

it was either hannibal or better call saul, i don’t remember which of those i watched most recently

(12.) when did i create this blog:

sometime in late 2019, i think? don’t remember exactly. i know i announced i remade in early 2020, but i’d been active on this blog for maybe about six months beforehand

(13.) what do i post:

all kinds of stupid and gay shit

(14.) last thing googled:

“in a world where clowns are real” (i was trying to find a particular tumblr post)

(15.) other blogs:

@catboyebooks (liveblogging; we’re playing dr1 right now) @sexytesting (portal sideblog)

also. i did hoard a url the other day to use as like, a danganronpa sideblog maybe? so i don’t have to be unhinged on main maybe? so i can turn search engine indexing off and hide from the fandom at large maybe? it will probably be like some percentage shitposting some percentage sloppily written meta posts i don’t really know. might drop the url if i do anything with it

(16.) do i get asks:

not often, but from time to time! i think most of my followers are mutuals so when we talk it’s mostly through DMs or something rather than asks

(17.) why did i choose this url:

no deep reasons, it’s just nya + adversary although my lovely mutual litzo junkheaded did point out it could be read as “NY adversary” which also fits, i like that too

(18.) following:

92. i’ve never been one to follow a lot of blogs, as long as my dash isn’t super slow i prefer to keep my following count low — i think most of the blogs i follow are mutuals actually

(19.) followers:

116. again i think the majority of these i’m in mutuals with

(20.) average hours of sleep:

i have bipolar disorder so no

(21.) lucky number:

1, 4, 9, 11, 17, 55, 69 (nice), 93, 95, 101, 417, 420 (nice), 428, 666 (nice), 4673

(22.) instruments:

i’m mainly a singer but i used to play fiddle (would like to pick it up again sometime), i know some very rudimentary piano/keyboard (i can do basic chords), i’m trying to learn ukulele and i’d also like to try learning guitar

also my school did force us to play the recorder but we got sort of hardcore with it, broke out the alto/tenor/bass recorders and all that. i used to play alto and tenor mainly but i’ve played like every type of recorder probably lmao

(23.) what am i wearing:

shrieking shack t-shirt with a really deep fried image of harry holding dead dobby on it

black and white checkered pants

boxered shorts

(24.) dream job:

i don’t dream about having jobs simply <3

but no ideally i wind up being some sort of author i guess?

(25.) dream trip:

anywhere. ahaha. let me out <3

(26.) favorite food:

some favorites no order: soft pretzels, like all pasta but my fave is tortellini, virtually all seafood honestly but especially crab, mussels, salmon, and anchovies, udon, ramen but not instant ramen i’ve had enough of that for one lifetime probably but will continue to eat it bc money, cheesecake, pizza but specifically like really good italian style pizza (new york style is also pretty good), garlic bread, really anything with garlic, salty foods in general

(27.) nationality:

american 😔

in terms of more specific cultural background, just for funsies: mom’s side is irish catholic mainly, her dad’s family is from county tipperary, i’m 3rd gen. she grew up on staten island and most of her family lives (or did live) in the tristate area. dad’s side is scots-irish with left welsh and has been here a while, since i think the mid or late 1600s? my paternal grandparents ended up settling and raising their family in socal (san diego) but both their families are from the southern appalachian region (grandfather on that side grew up in rural northern alabama, F to pay respects, and i don’t remember specifically about my grandmother)

(28.) favorite song:

i cannot pick. uh. the most played song in my itunes library is infinitesimal by mother mother, so, whatever that says about me

(29.) last book read:

does... does the komaeda manga count

(30.) three fictional universes you’d like to live in:

Three??? most of the fictional universes i like / am invested in are horrible nightmare realms. the only one i can think of that seems like an overall good time is pokemon and i don’t think i need to explain why that would whip ass

i tag: the girl reading this <3 or, like, whoever, you can do this if you want and say i tagged you, no obligation

[dropsofandromeda]

1-30 for the identity ask or is that too many?

Not too many :)

1. if someone wanted to really understand you, what would they read, watch, and listen to? Honestly there’s so many that I could list but I’ll settle for this: read Kurt Vonnegut, The Book Thief, Terry Pratchett, watch Star Trek, Mad Men, and Bones, and listen to Lana Del Rey and alt-J (this list is so short and I had a mega hard time picking it)

2. have you ever found a writer who thinks just like you? if so, who? No idea. There’s lots of writers that I *like* but idk if that means they think like me...

3. list your fandoms and one character from each that you identify with. Oh man you’re gonna out me like that? I have too many to name. I guess rn I’ll say Peter Parker (Spider-Man), Edmund Pevensie (Narnia), Temperence Brennan (Bones), uhhhh idk I have so many things I’m a fan of (also fun fact I don’t like the word “fandom”)

4. do you like your name? is there another name you think would fit you better? I guess I’ve never really thought about it. I like the name Emily but it seems so “me” that it kind of bores me now, especially since so many people have my name. I have a lot of names that I like for girls but I think I’ll just save them for when I have kids

5. do you think of yourself as a human being or a human doing? do you identify yourself by the things you do? sorry what? This question confuses me...but I guess I’d say I identify as a “human being” since there’s much more to a person than what they do

6. are you religious/spiritual? Yes. I was baptized as a Methodist but my family never went to church growing up, so I’m kind of figuring out the whole Christianity thing on my own as of late

7. do you care about your ethnicity? Why you gotta make it about race? To answer, it’s not really my ~identity~ to be white, but I do care about my family’s history and such, so I guess so?

8. what musical artists have you most felt connected to over your lifetime? In no particular order: Lana Del Rey, Britney Spears, Marina & The Diamonds, The Oh Hellos. There’s more but I would say these stand out

9. are you an artist? Not a particularly good one, but yeah. In terms of being creative, I do a lot of creative things, but I’d say I’m more of a writer than an artist

10. do you have a creed? This makes it seem like I’m part of some secret organization. Basically, it’s just “always treat others with respect, do what you can to help people.”

11. describe your ideal day. Wake up around 7-8, naturally, with no alarm. Lounge around with my dogs for most of the morning, maybe read a bit or watch some TV. Spend some time outside. Bake something warm, share it with the family. Talk to my friends, physically or digitally. Cuddle with my dogs in the evening with some hot chocolate, watch a movie or some television. Homework and other daunting tasks wouldn’t be in my mind at all because in my ideal day, they wouldn’t exist.

12. dog person or cat person? I hate this question because I’ve known lovely dogs and lovely cats so saying I only like one or the other seems wrong. But, I do own two dogs, and I love them with all of my heart, so I guess that makes me a dog person.

13. inside or outdoors? Both places are wonderful. I love the outdoors, but I also love being indoors. Whether I’m happy in a place often depends on what’s going on around me, and who’s with me, I guess.

14. are you a musician? Only in the shower.

15. five most influential books over your lifetime. The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins, Percy Jackson by Rick Riordan, Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut, Ender’s Game by Orson Scott Card, Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen.

16. if you’d grown up in a different environment, do you think you’d have turned out the same? Absolutely not. I think about this constantly. If I’d grown up in a different household, I’d probably be way more outgoing than I actually am. Nothing against my parents, I just wasn’t really socialized as much as other people my age. I might have the same interests and stuff, but that’s about it

17. would you say your tumblr is a fair representation of the “real you”? Since I don’t really write my own posts on it, only partially. But a lot of my interests that my IRL friends wouldn’t care about are on here. It’s a pretty good representation of my sense of humor and my interests

18. what’s your patronus? I think it was a fox or something I don’t really remember

19. which Harry Potter house would you be in? or are you a muggle? I think I’m more Hufflepuff, but the test I just took said Ravenclaw

20. would you rather be in Middle Earth, Narnia, Hogwarts, or somewhere else? Narnia!!!

21. do you love easily? Too easily, maybe. I tend to only spend my time with people I adore, everyone else is kind of just an “acquaintance” or someone I tolerate. Life’s a lot happier that way. But anyway, I find it easy to love the people around me, so yeah.

22. list the top five things you spend the most time doing, in order. Sleeping (though I am an early riser), being on my phone, playing with my dogs, homework, and...reading? I guess? I don’t really have a good gauge of how much time I spend doing things

23. how often would you want to see your family every year? All day every day baby, I’m a family kind of gal

24. have you ever felt like you had a “mind-meld” with someone? Yeah. With my best friends, I often feel like that

25. could you live as a hermit? I think I could do it, but I don’t know if I’d be happy. I’m an introvert, but you can only go so long without getting human interaction before you start to go insane.

26. how would you describe your gender/sexuality? Straight

27. do you feel like your outside appearance is a fair representation of the “real you”? I’ve been told I look younger than I am, so I guess so. I’m 19 but I feel like I’m younger than my peers. As for my looks, I’ve never been crazy about them, but I’m learning to just accept what I have and realize that if people are going to judge a person’s character entirely based on things they can’t change about themselves, I don’t need to listen to a word they say.

28. on a scale from 1 to 10, how hard is it for someone to get under your skin? I guess pretty easily, but I don’t show it. I’m pretty patient with other people, since I assume they’re doing the best they can.

29. three songs that you connect with right now. Karma (Marina), Swan Song (Lana Del Rey), Float (The Neighbourhood)

30. pick one of your favorite quotes. “One must from time to time attempt things that are beyond one’s capacity.” Renoir

Sorry it took me all day to answer this, I’ve been pretty busy lately. Also sorry for how long winded all of my answers were :)

[fly-pow-bye]

Powerpuff Girls 2016 - “Small World: Abra-Disaster” (Part 1)

Written by: Haley Mancini, Jake Goldman

Written & Storyboarded by: John West, Angela Zhang

Directed by: Nick Jennings, Bob Boyle

Like this reboot was a world of laughter before...

This special begins with Penguin Pete's, complete with their theme song: "Penguin Pete's, Penguin Pete's, yum yum yum yum yum." It's certainly no Cookie Cat jingle. This special will really focus on each of their personalities, at least early on, and this starts right from the beginning in this scene.

Buttercup has a brownie chocolate fudge that is so extreme, it's banned in six countries. Blossom, on the other hand, has gelato made of wheatgrass and soy. Because only nerds would want to be healthy. Bubbles has all 42 flavors, because, fitting to her character in more than the ways that they intended, she couldn't decide on which one to get.

However, this all gets interrupted by a bunch of minor villains starting crime. The Gnat is also swatting some poor sap with a giant fly swatter. And all of this is happening at the same time.

When the original Puffs had to do something like this, it ended with them getting exhausted to the point where they had to consider creating another sister. The Reboot Puffs can barely take on one crime at a time, so I highly doubt they're just going to beat up all of these villains and then eat their ice cream.

Except, that’s exactly what they do in this episode! In fact, they don’t even let go of their ice cream while they’re easily trouncing these villains. They even beat up some villains that didn't make it into that intro, like Pot-Head, Fuzzy Lumpkins, and even the Amoeba Boys.

Discount Jojo shows up with his Baggy Jeans Bot. Apparently, he's very conscious about being with the latest trends in fashion when he's committing his crimes. He even confirms to some random hipster passing by that it is acid-washed. With real acid, as he almost douses that hipster with it from a hose. At least it's because Jojo missed, and we can't use this as proof that the regular Townsville population have better reaction time than the Reboot Puffs.

With this powerful jeans robot that seems to fit the Fashionistas more than him, nobody can stop Jojo now...

...until Blossom pops him right in the kisser. Another big surprise: we actually see Blossom punch Jojo in the face without a hit flash! They just bash him left and right. Bubbles even takes over the jeans robot, and kicks his butt with its giant butt.

Unfortunately, before the Powerpuff Girls can punch him repeatedly and take him to jail just like the old days, with Buttercup even threatening to actually "lock him up for good", he suddenly disappears in a puff of smoke. The Powerpuff Girls say "huh" at this, but don't seem to pay it any mind. After all, maybe they were just so strong that Jojo ran out of HP!

However, that turns out to not be the case, as we see where Discount Jojo ended up. He has a decent theory just after waking up in this overly fancy place.

Discount Jojo: Oh no! Those Powerpuffs punched Mojo so hard, he landed in another dimension!

Didn't think this reboot would steal from the old Dragon Ball Z dub. Discount Jojo does seem like an infinite loser to me. No, not really, as the owner of this "another dimension" turns out to be a villain of legend! The Archduke of Anarchy! The King of Coiffures!

Lester Van Luster!

Don't worry if you never heard of him before, because it turns out this is his first appearance. However, we're supposed to see this guy as this legendary villain who managed to shrink the Eiffel Tower. I think this guy is supposed to be like some sort of Siegfried and Roy parody, but he looks more like some overly sugary cupcake to me. A Cupcake Shrinky Boy, if you will. I wish I came up with that.

But none of that matters to Discount Jojo, who is this guy's biggest fan. He kept a scrapbook of him, and even asks him to sign his brain when he shows off the shrunken Eiffel Tower. Yeah, in a way far too similar to Gru from Dispicable Me, this guy's gimmick is that he likes to shrink things.

Would the real Mojo Jojo look up to anyone, never mind someone like Cupcake Shrinky Boy here? Even this Jojo was angry over someone being better than him in previous episodes, but now we're supposed to believe he's a total fangirl of someone who we never seen before. That's one of the many reasons why we call him Discount.

Speaking of Not So Secret Service, the Powerpuff Girls are celebrating their victory by playing another violent fighting game. The Professor's strategy from keeping them from those has been replacing One Must Fall 2041 with Brutal: Paws of Fury. Nobody would want to play a fighting game ever again after playing that, but sadly for him, it didn't work.

As they're beating each other up in the game, they talk about how everything is just so easy for them. I understand that it was a general problem that the Reboot Puffs get beaten up, but this is really overcompensating that. In other episodes, they could get beaten by glitter, the Dewey Decimal System, and air, but not this time. Here, they can beat anyone, anywhere...

Bubbles: ...with any hair!

Ah, a running gag that even the other characters are annoyed by, as Buttercup tells her to stop doing that the very first time she does it. This running gag is supposed to be bad, guys! Laugh!

This episode goes in the complete opposite direction of most reboot episodes, which usually sees the Powerpuff Girls getting defeated rather easily so someone else can save them. It does not even try to ease us into it. Do not give us 90+ episodes of Monster Punch, Girls Down, and then tell us “these girls are invincible! Anytime, anywhere, any hair!”

Suddenly, their video game gets interrupted with a message from Discount Jojo. How did he get on the moon? How can he breathe in space without any kind of space suit? How did he hijack a video game like it was a late night Doctor Who rerun? He'll give us the answer in just a minute!

Blossom is, of course, worried. Via a bunch of stock images with some decent amount of work to make them a little more animated. Bubbles adds that if the moon blows up, the cow wouldn't have anything to jump over!

Cow: (scare chord) Mooooo!

Yes, that's a cow. The reboot needed to let us know what a cow is, just in case we didn't know. They were even helpful enough to make it moo. Who said this show wasn't educational for your toddler?

Much like the last beatings they dished out, they’re not even going to focus 100% of their energy on beating him. They bring their video game with them, which manages to still work even though there’s no electricity around. Maybe this is one of their other rare superpowers: the ability to give out electricity to video game consoles.

While speculating on how many seconds it would take to take Jojo down for what is supposed to be the umpteenth time, they’re suddenly whacked in the face with a magician's top hat. Discount Jojo the Not-So-Magnificent shows his face to these Puny-Puffs, and Blossom can't help but point out something I already pointed out.

Blossom: Hey, how can you even breathe in space?

Discount Jojo: MAGIC!

Oh, hush, Discount. Even Buttercup calls this a lame excuse. They rush in, and I'm sure they're going to beat this monkey up again and finish their video game just like they said they would do.

Magic Punch, Girls Down, womp womp. In several different "magic" ways, too. He's really taking his new gimmicks very seriously. He uses playing cards to stick Bubbles to a rock. He bashes down Blossom and Buttercup with a hammer after doing a disappearing trick. Bubbles then gets distracted by the classic "pulling a rabbit out of a hat" trick. Despite what Rocky says, that trick may work after all! The last one's a bit slow, but the others are okay.

It seems like it's another "Powerpuff Girls get beaten up until some magic being shows up to save them in the end" scene. Thankfully, that doesn't happen, as they do manage to get up and do a few parlor tricks of their own. Just like a certain episode of the original, really.

Specifically, Abra-Cadaver. It is one of the episodes they definitely have seen, since they referenced it in Memory Lane of Pain. In that episode, Abra-Cadaver, not Memory Lane of Pain, a magician is thwarted by the Powerpuff Girls learning a few magic tricks of their own. That's essentially what they do here, even combining it with their own aura powers for good measure. Fighting fire with fire, and there's some good gags here, too.

It all ends with Blossom doing a grand finale: putting him in a coffin. Thankfully for Jojo, Blossom decided not to use an iron maiden this time. Jojo gets put in iron chains instead. Probably not as strong as ordinary rope, but that probably terrifies them.

But, uh oh, they spent all of this time beating up Jojo the Not-So-Magnificent, they forgot all about the bomb! The Powerpuff Girls decide to stay in one place and do a big no, knowing that even if they tried, they would just fail anyway.

How do they manage to get rid of this bomb without making that poor cow angry? Turns out, they didn't need to, in a twist that even I couldn't expect. If you read this far, I'm sorry to say I do not do the ellipsis any more because I now assume you read these after you watch the episode. Right?

The bomb "explodes", with confetti and a big sign that says "BOOM". The bomb turned out to be a fake, and it was all just a distraction; an "opening act" for the real act. Besides, with his brains, Discount Jojo knows the dangers of blowing up the moon. I mean, what would the cow jump over?

Cow: (scare chord) Mooooo!

Just in case you missed it, kids. This is a cow. She goes "moo". He then uses his magic hat to show a projection of said "real act": Sparkly Sprinkles is about to do his biggest magic trick yet from his sky-high Secret Lair. Pretty sure you can't really be that secret if you're up in the sky, but that's beyond the point.

Blossom gets a call from the Mayor on her smartphone, which apparently gets really good reception on the moon. She hears the Mayor is adoring this big shiny light in the sky that is getting ever so closer. They fly all the way down to the place they called home for so long, only to find that...

Blossom: It's...it's gone.

TO BE CONTINUED...

Wow. I mean, that's actually a very powerful end for this first part. No unneeded random quips, no farting, no fancy dream catchers, just "oops, Townsville's now a giant crater, and it's all our fault!" It made me anxious to see the next part, and that is something I didn't expect.

Does this part’s title fit?

Yeah, this is the one that really plays up the magic angle.

How does this part stack up?

The “we’re invincible” gag got really old, especially considering this reboot tends to go against that far too often for me to take that seriously. That’s really the only problem with this particular part. The whole special has its own issues, which I’ll detail when I’m done with this.

Some decent magic trick jokes, some good cameos in the beginning, and an ending that actually hooks you in for the rest of the special. All in all, a pretty good opener.

With a relatively good opener, it could only go downhill from here, right? See you tomorrow for Part 2.

← Salamander ☆ Small World: Stone Cold Spider (Part 2) →

[sillyfudgemonkeys]

What's your favorite and least favorite persona battle theme?

Only including Mainline Persona games and their remakes and PQ. Not including Fighting/Dance games, the anime/movies, or P5′s DLC (I’ll have you know that I have the dancing one equip tho, both cause I like Anne and MC’s costumes and cause I like the song, even if that version of the song is slow to the hook).

Side note: these are listed mostly in order of series rather than which I like most of the favs, cause it really depends on the mood a lot of the songs are really good but have their own feel so depending on the situation I might want to listen to one instead of the other.

Regular battle theme:

Fav: Mass Destruction (any ver), Wiping All Out, and Reach Out To The Truth (I like how both P3′s are just “we’re gonna annihilate them” and we do and fits the mood of exploring a kill or be killed dungeon, and I like how P4 sticks to its theme)

Least Fav: Time to Make History.....sigh.....do I really have to explain it?

Side note: Both ver Light the Fire Up in the Night get honorable mention (I prefer the female singer on the P4 ver and the rapping on the P3 ver tho). I like Last Surprise a lot, but the hook comes in too late for me. And not a fan of Life Will Change, well like...I’m not a fan of how it overrides LS or any DLC song, LWC gets you pumped but....eh.....only really pumps me up for some of the bosses (1, 6, and maybe 7) the rest I feel like I’m going through the motions and rather have a different song.

Boss Battle (regular/bonus/special bosses) Theme:

Fav: Knights of the Holy Lance (any ver), Additional Boss Battle (P2EP PSP), Danger Zone, I’ll Face Myself, Disturbances - The One Called from Beyond 

Least Fav: Will Power and Blooming Villain

Side note: “what no rivers in the desert?!” I do like that one, but tbh it feels like they overused it....esp since it was supposed to be a one boss battle song?? AND NOT the final boss????(kinda restarting each phase with Shido, and then again for the Holy Grail....like? Really? Couldn’t give the Holy Grail it’s own theme? Well I shouldn’t be surprised since you shoved Beneath the Mask down my throat with it’s overplay so whatever >.>)

Final Boss battle Theme:

Fav: Burn My Dread -last battle-, The Genesis, The Infinite. (BMD-lb- is a great call back to the OP, Genesis has the despair that wears you down and then that uplifting melody with the orchestra oh my god so beautiful, and then Infinite iirc had a nice melody that rang a similar tune to P3 and P4). 

Least Fav: Both phases of Jaldabaoth, yes even the uplifting phase 2 portion, (never liked P5′s melody, at least I think that’s what it was in phase 2, cause tbh....it’s....not the most consistent melody nor is it very good imo). But I like the 2nd phase more than the 1st. 

I just.....really hate P5′s OST ok? I hate it’s melody (tbh I feel like it has like.....more than one melody, but they’re pretty forgettable regardless), all the slow acid jazz all sounds the same, even some of the rock boss battles do too. P5 has the most tracks to work with, it has twice or three times as P3/4 had, and yet it still sounds like they’re only using 2/3 songs all the time. And I know all those tracks didn’t go to the dungeons, and it’s not like they’re all really good on their own (Sae’s is the only one that really stands out and felt like there was effort put into it, the rest feel like general dungeon music), and this also doesn’t include Mementos (which is a whole other just....god what were they thinking). Say what you want about Tartarus and the TV World. Sure they might not have all been amazing, but Tartarus at least slowly evolved as you went up (and if you didn’t care then ask Fuuka to change the tunes then), and the TV World were all different from each other, might’ve only been one song but they were all different and all planted themselves firmly into my brain. Yeah Palaces were all different from each other, but tbh I barely recall when they changed songs within the dungeon, and the Mementos had one freaking song and didn’t even evolve like Tartarus did (Mementos is a poor man’s Tartarus fight me).

 Like....P3/4 had a lot of variety in their OSTs, to say one is only j-rap and the other is only j-pop is doing both P3/4 a disservice. Both have pop, both have rock, P4′s rocking that violin, P3′s I think rocking a synthesizer and rap, both have sad tracks that make you feel sad in different ways (P3′s “Living with Determination” is sad but is still oddly hopeful it’s almost bittersweet....it really feels like someone who is experiencing something bad and is willing to keep going with their sheer determination, while P4′s “Reverie” not only lives up to it’s musical piece’s name’s definition, being dreamlike, it also sounds like the embodiment of it’s other definition which is someone who is lost in thought/daydream....a really sad daydream but it just hits you, it feels like someone who experiencing depression and is trying to remember the happy times before breaking down. P5′s alleycat tho? Sounds like someone who is just licking their wounds, not in a sad sense, just “wow this is pitiful” on top of the fact it kinda sounds like a P4 reject song....I feel no sadness or sympathy when I hear Alleycat). Both had ominous songs for their own game. P4 also actually sounded like a detective show. 

The only thing I could think about for P3/4 is that, sometimes they didn’t.....really fit the scene (mostly happened with P3 from what I remember). Like sometimes Living with Determination is great for a lot of the sad scenes, but sometimes Reverie would’ve fit better (or vice versa). Or like iirc P3′s one scene with Star the MC gets a phone call with Mamoru saying “Yo man my mom collapsed” or something, and the happy event song is still....just playing, instead of a an intense or worried or sad song (which P4 would do). XP Or like when you max out your female love interests on the male side of P3, the dorm or hangout song is playing instead of a.....more tender song choice (and I checked Tender Feelings isn’t on the male side in P3P). I mean, FeMC only changed 6-8 songs from Minato (like 2 battle songs, and 4 after school songs, with maybe 2 more school related songs), the rest of her OST is exactly the same as Minato’s....with the exception of one song. They ADDED one more song to her list and it was Tender Feelings and, it was used for....you know....tender moments, and boy did it help with the atmosphere. Just one song helped P3. And so....P3/4′s issue isn’t that it doesn’t have variety, it HAS variety, but a few extra alt songs would still work/help it out but they do pretty good for having less. P5 however, has so many songs but even less variety which....boggles my mind. 

Another thing, not a point against P5 just....something I find that’s really strong in P3/4, is that P3/4′s melodies are so iconic and.....memorable, and they way they’re used.....I just find P3/4 are the kings of nostalgia. There’s just something about their songs that invoke nostalgia even if it’s not one that has one of those melody influences. Their call back game is amazing. 

(Also I know Iwai and Tae’s store songs are pretty good and different but they’re wasted as store songs in all honesty, and Encounter Lovers is great but it’s used like once which is a shame....and ngl it Encounter song like if P4′s Corner of Memories, P3′s Because I will Protect you, and Catherine’s OST had a baby....which I’m fine with). 

Sorry for the rant, felt like I needed to explain at least partially why I didn’t like P5′s OST. It’s not that “I don’t like Jazz” I do, but I don’t like how P5 songs like only one half-hearted Jazz song (and the other time a rock song). P3/4 have had jazz or jazz influences in their OST, and I do like Jazz in general....but P5 doesn’t sound like it’s playing Jazz, it’s just one song over and over for me. 

I know I talked about P3-5, but what about P1/2 (I know I did mention a few in the boss battle portion)? I either like it or I’m neutral. A lot of songs I’m neutral on tbh, they fit but they aren’t earworms to me (a lot of P3/4′s special boss themes are like this for me). Only P5 do I get annoyed tbh. 

[doctormelapples]

all the a s k s

Here you go homie:

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk?More milk, get them slightly soggy cinnamon toast crunch 2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day?One of my favorite feelings tbh 3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books?Receipts,,,,,, I doggy ear them from the bottom 4: how do you take your coffee/tea?Tea, STRONG, Maybe with a lil honey 5: are you self-conscious of your smile?I cover my face with my hand when I laugh, if that is the connection 6: do you keep plants?A goal of mine is to keep plants 7: do you name your plants?I totally would, I named everything 8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings?Photography??, Writing? 9: do you like singing/humming to yourself?I do all the time. Apparently I hum when I work, but I don’t often notice 10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach?Um side? Idk I just asked the only person who has seen me sleeping in the last three months, she said I can’t make up my mind 11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends?SharkBecks,, #rip, Crab walk,, In this Denny’s tonight,,,, whipping in response to an attack on your person 12: what’s your favorite planet?Uranus 13: what’s something that made you smile today?I went to coffee with my ride or die and that was fun 14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like?The walls would be brick for sure, wood floors, shit ton of rugs, plants everywhere, we stole the plants from cafes, small windows, maybe circular, you know that nasty looking gross pale blue fridge, looking nasty and old, that one, and we found a bright red couch on the side of the road, it’s perfect, string lights, and the occasional lamp, old fashioned lightbulbs, warm light, yellow and orange lights, a mix of framed and not framed posters, bean bag chairs for parties, Cupboard space, only used for mugs, paintings and art, and photographs, polaroids, all over the fridge, cupboards with pins and magnets, probably some salt crystals, salt lamps, some rose quartz stuff, candles everywhere. It’s a study apartment, so all we have are two really big beds in the middle of the beds, THROW PILLOWS EVERYWHERE, too many pillows,, polaroids hanging from string lights on the ceiling, BOOKS EVERYWHERE, stacks everywhere, corners= books, top of the fridge=books, vanity made of several different old mirrors, hanging cubbies for our shoes, we share all the time anyway, no floor space, fashion racks for all of our clothes, we mix, cuz we always share clothes anyway 15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is!Did you know Venus is the hottest planet, not mercury, even tho it’s closest to the sun? Also NASA is fake and nothing is real? 16: what’s your favorite pasta dish?Lasagna 17: what color do you really want to dye your hair?PINK BLONDE WITH DARK ROOTS, AND PINK 18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up.Something I did? Welcccs, I said welcccs In the gc once,,, never lived down, Pronunciation: Whelc-k-kz I also said pipin’ ass tea, so 19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it?Lot’s 20: what’s your favorite eye color?Green 21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces.I have a bag, that I got recently, it’s black leather looking, and I have a white puffball on it, and I love her, Victoire, is her name. 22: are you a morning person?YEET NOPE 23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations?Sit and contemplate the fact that literally nothing is real and nothing matters. Or go to the park with my friends 24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets?No, tbh 25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into?I broke into a closet once 26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit?My grey hightop converse 27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor?Sour Apple 28: sunrise or sunset?Sunrise 29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing?Anytime @thumper-darling sits in a comfy chair she immediately snuggles up with the arm of the chair for a hot mo 30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared?Yes, shall I tell the story?? Send me an ask and I’ll tell it 31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks.I love socks, I like weird socks. Sleeping with socks on is of the devil. No fuck off, I have this pair that is a strawberry, one sock is the right side, and one is the other half, and I love them, I also have lime ones like that, and I have lots of different, polka dotted ones that I can wear as mix and matched 32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends.I went on an adventure to a city a lil out of the way, and it was like exactly 2:54, I have it on a video, and it was lit, we walked around the city, at 3 in the morning, and got passed by 4 different police cars, we made up a plan to tell them who we were, but neither of us really think straight ever, so it was a damn mess. 33: what’s your fave pastry?I love a good strudel 34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it?I got my fav stuffy on my seventh birthday, sophie, a white dog that glowed if you pressed her hand, My mom snuck up to my attic room that I shred with my sister, and handed it to me, It felt like it was exactly midnight, but it was probably only like 10, and she glowed and I love her. She sits in my closet and watches over me now. She stopped glowing a few years after I got her. Her lights died, after so many battery replacements 35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often?I love them, so much, but I don’t have many. I would use them all the time, if I had more. 36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now?I got my rose scented candle going, I got my main lights off, and I’m listening to my drunk friend breathe over the phone while she reads probably It by Stephen King, let’s go with,,, alt-J, does he count? Or Wild Party? The 1975?? IDK 37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean?I think better in messy, but I do like clean 38: tell us about your pet peeves!Do I have pet peeves? People telling other people that I’m “in a mood”, touching my stuff without asking, someone making offhand comments about something without explaining themselves, DONT TOUCH MY HAIR 39: what color do you wear the most?Pink? Black? Pales, neutrals essentially. 40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you?I don’t actually really wear jewelry 41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving?The Girl Who Circumnavigated Fairyland in a Ship of Her Own Making 42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it!Coffee Chaos, it’s a blessing. I actually have two, to be realistic. Espresso Milano has the aesthetic, the vibe, but Coffee Chaos’ coffee is just better, so 43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with?I watched stars with some of my photography classmates, the other day, we were shooting on location, and it was Night™ 44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything?I don’t know her!!!!! WAIT JK I had a dream about Taehyung the other day, idk man it was pretty damn serene, can you believe that tae is the most beautiful man in the world 45: do you trust your instincts a lot?Always, if my vibes don’t jive w u hecks off 46: tell us the worst pun you can think of.The only puns that currently reside in my soul rn are in Korean… wolwol…. How bout: I’m going to bed,,, Mind if I Slytherin 47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe?FUCKING COTTAGE CHEESE 48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today?My mom being mad at me,, debatably. 49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought?I love Record Storesssss,,, a happy place, tbh 50: what’s an odd thing you collect?I used to collect bottle cap tops, like izze tops, Snapple tops, etc. I’m tryna collects pins/buttons now tho 51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them?I associate tipsy by J-Kwon with @thumper-darling 52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far?I dig some snazzy The Floor is me me z, nothing but respect for my president, right in front of my salad, the ditty.its, he protecc he attacc, etc there were some good memez this year 53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them?I’ve only seen heathers out of all of these and it was the play, it was pretty hecking good. 54: who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face?My aunt at my cousins funeral. 55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point?Honestly whom knows, once I painted my hand bright green, but for no reason so there’s your answer 56: what are some things you find endearing in people?I like it when people smile while reading, 57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics?Lit,, get lit, if you don’t dramatically reenact the lyrics did you even listen to bohemian Rhapsody? 58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why?@thumper-darling is the wine mom, and the vodka aunt. She’s an alcoholic. Rip 59: what’s your favorite myth?One of my faves 60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?I do, but I don’t often retain names,,,, rip, one of the first ones I memorized was the jabberwocky by lewis Carroll 61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received?I gave a mcdonalds happy meal toy away once as a gift, and once I got a whole ass gum wrapper legitimately 62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind?Love me some juice. I favor Apple Juice, but no o n e else in the house drinks apple juice so all we ever have is orange juice. 63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be?Stacks, my music, yes, but theses books really be out here, overflowing from my shelves, so we got stacks, and any organization they had is now gone. 64: what color is the sky where you are right now?The sky is dark rn, cuz it’s night, but during the day this week it’s white and grey cuz it’s Rainy Week™ in Michigan rn. 65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with?I can list a good few people. My old classmates, from my old school. That would be nice 66: what would your ideal flower crown look like?My most ideal flower crown would have flown pink stained roses, vines with thorns, small white and pink flowers, be really extra in the center like a crown. 67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel?Serene, content 68: what’s winter like where you live?Slushy, sometimes we get lots of snow, sometimes its lacking, 69: what are your favorite board games?I love clue, I got a doctor who version for xmas last year, best gift in years ngl. I also love risk; world domination, and a new fav: Truth Bombs™ Created by Daniel Howell and Phillip Lester available anywhere they sell games, for example: B&N where you can pick up The Amazing Book is Not On Fire at the same time, and while you’re at it, check out Dan and Phil Go Outside. 70: have you ever used a ouija board?FUCK OUTTA HERE FUCK OYOU MEAN FUCJBOI NO 71: what’s your favorite kind of tea?I dig some good ol’ Bengal spice, I dig strong spicy tea 72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it?I mean, yes, but do I write shit down? The answer is no 73: what are some of your worst habits?Picking at my nails, making internal commentary on Everything around me @ a l l t I m m e s 74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns.They really out here, at all times. They tend to be the loudest of the group, and they honestly bring the party. Story telling skills level master, You can’t beat them, They’re just so good at telling an entertaining story, even if it isn’t entertaining. Sometimes doesn’t have good days, and that’s okay. 75: tell us about your pets!I have two dogs, Maddie, and Arenal,, Maddie is a boxer lab mix, and she’s allergic to like literally everything 100% ,,, except cats. Arenal is a white blonde golden retriever and he’s the laziest mf I’ve ever met 76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t?A literal Photography assignment, idk why I procrastinate on these, I love doing them. 77: pink or yellow lemonade?Pink! 78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub?HATECLUB FUK U 79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you?My promposal last year was pretty dang cute, rip that tho. 80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why?I didn’t get to chose, they’re kinda a milky white, I don’t mind it to much, its not bad 81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of.doe eyes, at their finest, and that’s what I got 82: are/were you good in school?Not really, like I’m pretty average tbh 83: what’s some of your favorite album art?I really loved Young The Giants “Home of the Strange” CRUISR’s album art is all pretty aesthetic, Anti was good, I liked “Bleak” by Froth, “Cult of Personality” by Varsity, and like tons others 84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones?Yeah! I want to get a lineart tattoo of a swing set, with wildflowers growing specifically yellow and red flowers with light blue ink for the swings, I want to get something to do with Scorpio, and I also want an vertical ellipses in my inner elbow 85: do you read comics? what are your faves?Not really, But I have read Archie comics my whole life, Betty n Veronica, I looked at the new Riverdale ones, it’s pretty okay. You can’t really beat the go comics tho. and I own some snazzy local artists comics, those are my faves 86: do you like concept albums? which ones?I guess so,, I don’t really go out of my way to recognize it tho. I like Hospice by The Antlers, Of course Lemonade, does channel orange count? Idk, I had to look up a list of concept albums to say which ones I liked. 87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives?Breakfast Club, Men in Black, Star Wars, Harry Potter, (all) the og Wizard of Oz, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Hocus Pocus, ET, LOTR, um and more for sure, but idk right off the top of my head 88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy?I suppose there, are but I couldn’t tell you the name 89: are you close to your parents?I’d say I’m like relatively close to my mother, but not so much my dad 90: talk about your one of you favorite cities.Just one? It’s either Chicago or Stratford, let’s go w Stratford, Ontario, okay. There is a lot stuff going on in the summer over in stratford, they have the Stratford Shakespeare festival and the theatres in the area are beautiful as shit. I haven’t been there while it’s not going on, but I gather it’s a very touristy sorta town. They have ups and downs in streets, it’s not big enough to get lost, but you can still lose yourself in the different shops and cafes. 91: where do you plan on traveling this year?The year is almost over, but it would be nice to visit my family who live hours + hours away. I want to go down to the capital and go to my favorite shops in the city I used to live. 92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch?I’m lactose intolerant 93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most?Probably a half up pony tail 94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday?My friend Jalee, her birthday was the 21st and she is exactly 3 weeks and 3 days older than me. 95: what are your plans for this weekend?I have a halloween party I might go to, or else I’ll be at my dad’s house this weekend. 96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot?I procrastinate a lot,,, I have pressed the damn remind me later button so often,,, 97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house?Oh shit I can’t remember my Myer briggs, maybe I should take the test again,,,, okay hold on…. Okay: ENTP-T Scorpio, Slytherin, 98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it?Maybe this summer? I love hiking, It’s one of my favorite things to do 99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them.Suburbia by Troye Sivan, Growing Old on Bleeker Street by AJR, Trapdoor by twenty one pilots, Body Gold by Oh Wonder, Sea by BTS, Art Exhibit by Young the Giant, Titus was Born by Young the Giant, actually that whole album Home of the Strange by Young the Giant. 100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why?5 Years into the future, I never wanna go back. Unless I could change events, in which case I’d go back.

[larajeannesong]

I was tagged by @chasejackson thanks babe sorry I’m so late in doing this 

The rules are to answer the questions and then tag people you want to get to know better

1. How old are you? 16

2. What’s your current job? hmm i’m still a student but I also babysit once in a while

3. What are you talented at? being a big idiot all the time (jk though I’m actually pretty good at writing and also making shit, i.e. cooking, baking, crafting) 

4. What is a big goal you are working towards (or have already achieved)? to learn as many languages as I can and become a translator

5. What’s your aesthetic? lmao you can see it here

6. Do you collect anything? not really, just stuff that I think would look good in my bujo

7. What’s a topic you always talk about? Books and tv shows and music, anything really. I love to talk 

8. What’s a pet peeve of yours? People who fish for complements, hypocrites, PEOPLE CHEWING LOUDLY

9. Good advice to give? Always be yourself no matter what, even if you think people won’t like you. I spent too long trying to fit other people’s standards and not enough time being myself and it’s been pretty damaging (I’m fine now tho!!) Also, don’t be afraid to try new things just because you think you might be bad at it. The only way to get better at something is to practice (it’s cliche I know)

10. What are three songs you’d recommend? Soap by Melanie Martinez, Life Itself by Glass Animals, and Something Good by alt-j 

I tag @spaceboyandrew @festinus @glg-ab @vanillasweet @hxdesblood @jostenofexy @mavencalore and anyone else who wants to do this!

[house-for-musicians-blog]

RAW HOUSE #4: Timothy Charles - In the Middle of the Picture

“Raw House” is a series of interviews exploring, discovering and presenting new and unknown artist on the Bandcamp platform. Each interview is an insight and deep-dive into one particular artist chosen randomly though the selection of members of the House for /Mu/sicians Facebook group. Consider joining if you’re an artist yourself! Enjoy this interview!

Plenty of singer-songwriters appear on the Bandcamp scene, almost too many in fact. The number of which doesn't create anything specific, interesting or engaging in any way, shape or form. So it's always pleasant to find musicians in this field doing something new and fresh, creating their alternative soundscapes and shaping their inner identity with their music. One of them being Perth-based Timothy Charles. In this Raw House installment we'll explore his life, creative process, (fanatic?) love for Radiohead and garage delay, track by track.

Listen while reading to the Timothy’s first EP entitled „Anchor” 

Anchor EP by Timothy Charles

I. “SEND THEM HOME, THEY’VE NO BUSINESS BEING HAPPY”

RAW HOUSE: You've released „Anchor EP” early December 2016. Now was this your first ever project? How did you come to start your own music project? Was it hard for you?

TIMOTHY: Yes, that was my first ever project - it actually features the first song I ever 'put to tape', though I mean it was digital because I'm not clever enough to use tape. I'd been messing around for a while and “Relief Anecdotal”, the first track, was pastiched together from samples of vocals and guitars I had recorded earlier, all very late at night. It only took about two days. The other songs took similar amounts of time - the recording mostly consisted of happy accidents, with the production being the most difficult part, mostly because I had no clue what I was doing. So yeah, it was difficult, even if I kinda fluked my way through some of it. I was still in school at the time and I actually came to start the project because I'd never had a microphone to record with before (besides my iPod/iPhone) and with the one I borrowed from the media room I was free to record.

RAW HOUSE: This release starts out with a very beautiful „Relief Anecdotal” track which presents your music very well. We have baritone voice, a very mellow sound, darkness which is visible on the cover art. What would you say are your inspirations? What shaped your sound?

TIMOTHY: Thank you for the kind words. Around the time that I came up with Relief I was basically completely submerged in a Radiohead obsession, and, in some way, the way that they play around with dissonance and jazz chords influenced the guitar and the ambiance (actually the very slowed sounds of the lights flickering at my local library) that comes in at the halfway point, definitely influenced me. I was (and still am) very into Alt-J, particularly into their use of bass synths, which is what made me want to include one for the climax of my own song. As well as this, my sound was shaped by my limited knowledge of production, recording, and my own voice - at that point, vocally, I honestly struggled to hold a note, and only had limited instrumentation, so I supposed I modeled my sound around that subconsciously.

RAW HOUSE:  Now „Queer” is really short but it tells a lot, especially telling of your sexuality. Now it's no surprise for me that you're gay and that lead me to some thoughts regarding the place that you live. Is it hard to be of the different sexual interests in the place where you are right now? Why do you find the topic of different sexualities worth exploring?

TIMOTHY:  „Queer” is actually interesting in that it wasn't consciously about homsexuality at all. Growing up I read a lot of Enid Blyton, a British author, who used the word queer in a more old-fashioned sense to mean „strange”. I had recently come out of a relationship with a girl at that point (I'm actually bisexual, but effectively gay right now but same difference) and Queer captured more a sense of a very sudden change about to occur than LGBT issues. I do think that LGBT issues are important, though, as, often, the romantic aspects of them aren't often addressed in music - like, „I Kissed A Girl” by Katy Perry isn't exactly romantic, it's entirely physical. I believe that making music about the loving, pure side of homosexual relationships is important in helping normalize it. So, on that note, the single I released called 5:AM is actually a love song to my boyfriend, and I have several other songs on the topic in the works. And to answer your question on the difficulty of it... it's not easy. But I just feel lucky not to be in Russia or other such places right now. My heart goes out to the people being effected there.

RAW HOUSE: „Mistakes” is a track which really got me hooked to your stuff and I can't really tell you why. It feels sparse yet that looseness feels like a part of a deeper concepts, especially through the incorporation of the lyrics on this track. How does your lyrical process starts? Do you only take themes from your personal experiences?

TIMOTHY: Oh yeah, definitely. „Mistakes” was written, entirely while I was still in my last relationship. That relationship went very, very sour, and for a long time it contributed to a sort of dark cloud over my life. The idea of mistakes being made for me in heaven is a reference to the biblical idea of original sin - you are predestined to be impure and imperfect and make mistakes. From my viewpoint, though, I think that in retrospect I felt trapped and so that I felt that I had no choice but to stay in the situation and live out the mistakes that had been predestined for me. That track definitely took the most planning, lyrically and musically - the outro actually came to me when I was asleep, chord names and all, and the rest of the track was built around that.

RAW HOUSE: „Iconoclast” feels eerie. The baroque voice and pretty much this dire emptiness pulls a lot of connections towards religion, especially those of the Abrahamic religions. What's your stance on the religion itself, from your experience? Is that iconoclastic view point a part of your life?

TIMOTHY: „Iconoclast” is very much about religion, good call. It also ties into LGBT issues a bit, but not really in an obvious way. The use of the word 'iconoclast' is a double meaning because it has two rough meanings. One of these is 'a person who attacks or criticizes cherished beliefs or institutions.' In this case, this is me - I am criticizing the bigoted nature of the Christian church. The other meaning of the word is 'a destroyer of religious images.' This is the church's perception of me - that I am doing something wrong. This is reinforced by the line 'send them home, they've no business being happy', which is how it seems like religious organisations feel about LGBT people most of the time. This one was also recorded in my garage on my iPod using the natural reverb there, which is... nifty.

RAW HOUSE: Nifty, you say? Are you a fan of recording music in a very specific environments to fit the sound you're trying to show or is it just a good lack on your part?

TIMOTHY: I think that it fit for that track - I'd like to go some other places for natural reverb, but background noise is a factor - Iconoclast is only two minutes long but birds singing, sticks hitting the roof and cars driving past can all be heard. It adds a nice effect, sort of a song about society occurring in a space noticeably affected by suburban life, but it wouldn't work for all of my tracks. Since Christmas I've gotten an SM57, which I cherish, and though I plan on getting into some grittier sounds in the near-ish future, I feel like the microphone and a controlled indoor environment will take precedence.

RAW HOUSE: „5​:​AM” was a very weird track, released in early February this year. It has some of that Bon Iver vibe to it and yet it feels very similar to stuff presented on „Anchor EP”. How do feel you want to expand your music horizons with your music?

TIMOTHY: „5​:​AM” is very close to my heart - it's the only real straight up love song I've recorded, and, yes, I was going through a big Bon Iver phase when I made that so the influence is pretty obvious in the auto-tune and vocal layering and stuff. That's another track I put together on my iPod, actually - there's an app called 'multi track song recorder' which allows you to record up to 4 tracks, and email them to yourself. So, I recorded a guitar track, mostly improvised, and then three voice tracks, the lyrics completely improvised minus the main line, 'dissociating at 5 in the morning in my arms, singing All I Need.' All I Need is my favorite song of all time, from Radiohead's In Rainbows. The funny thing is my future music isn't likely to sound much like this - I mean, I have better equipment now - but the vocal artifacting was actually used so that I could hide the lyrical content from my family, with whom I share my music. I am not openly gay to my extended family, and by muffling my pronunciation I felt safe releasing the song.

RAW HOUSE: What I've also see is a very big contrast between the covers. On one we have a very futuristic-esque vision – colorful lights, the distinct numbers on the cover itself, reminds me of cyberpunk a bit – while on the other we have a very green-ish landscape, with sea-like elements to it. How important for you are the covers that you include with your releases? How do you decide which art comes onto the cover?

TIMOTHY: Both of those images were actually taken by myself, on my phone, which has a camera that isn't fantastic, and edited by my friend Daniel, who has a god eye for these things, with input from me. I am VERY visual when it comes to music - sometimes I can't listen to an album if I really don't like the art, and it can change how I perceive the music. So, I try and match the music to the colors I see while listening to it. The „Anchor EP”'s photo was taken at the end of a jetty in a place called Busselton, in an underwater observatory where tourists can look out eight metres below the surface through thick glass at the life under the jetty. This sort of mixture of pressure, darkness and life - and the sort of symbolic weight of the anchor, feeling 'anchored' to my last relationship, etc., matched the mood of the EP. „5​:​AM”'s cover was a happy accident, as most of the songs I have released so far were (this is changing in my future work - I have been poring over everything, I'm going mad) It's actually a picture of my boyfriend happily running across a lit-up bridge that we were walking across. I thought that the colorfulness matched the romantic aspect and the gay theme, with the lighting matching the 'futuristic' element implied by the auto-tune and synthesizer use.

RAW HOUSE: Your music, so far, is very much made in the mindset of a singer-songwriter, as far as I can see. I mean, we have a guy singing and playing tunes on his guitar – pretty basic stuff it seems. But how did you decided this stylistic to be your way into the music? Why do you find yourself using eeriness, sadness, scarcity within your music?

TIMOTHY: I feel like a lot of the scarcity has come from my lack of resources - all I owned musically at the time of making „Anchor EP” and „5​:​AM” was a cheap classical guitar and an Epiphone electric, a Vox practice amp, and two effects pedals. The Radiohead influence, too, probably influenced that - they made me realize that if a song is any good, it doesn't have to be blown up and have a lot going on at once - bare bones, if they're good bones (weird metaphor there) can be just as good as a very complex track. The eeriness/sadness aspect was most likely influenced by the mental state I was in at the time and my attempts to make my music atmospheric. I think atmosphere is very important. I essentially tried to communicate a feeling in each song and for the most part those feelings weren't positive.

II. THE MUSIC OF LOVE

RAW HOUSE: I've heard you were planning to release more music soon. Could you give us a hint of what's going to come out from you in the near future?

TIMOTHY: Well, that's... there's a lot. I've had a lot of songs sort of rotating in my head for the better part of a year and a half. Most of these were conceived around the time that „Mistakes” was. Every song that I'm working on now, I am trying to pour myself into - I spend about a solid week working on one recently. Soon I plan to release an EP called „Worth Your Salt?" which will have three songs - one, called „Love I Swear It”, is a choir-y acoustic guitar song about coming out of the other side of a terrible relationship. The second song, „Ctmt”, or „Catamite”, is about how the sexualisation of gay couples is contributing to them being killed - I listened to Boards of Canada and James Blake a lot before making this. There are de-tuned vocal samples and it's mostly in falsetto, which is new for me. I wanted to communicate in a sort of less stereotypically masculine way. „Love I Swear It” and „Ctmt” are completely recorded, and mostly mixed. The final song, „He/His/Hymn”, is another love song, and is intended to be a solo acoustic piano and voice piece with no vocal overdubs. Of course, I haven't recorded that song yet and I'm already thinking into the future - I have a lot of older songs planned, arranging them in my head. They're much more rhythmic and openly political in nature, featuring more distorted guitar tones and more aggressive vocals.

RAW HOUSE: How do you feel it will differ from your previous releases?

TIMOTHY: I think it differs mostly in that it's... better. I've become a considerably better singer since I made the „Anchor EP” - my vocal range has increased and I've gained some control of my falsetto range (though it isn't incredible.) My production skills have increased, I would think, and, unlike „Anchor EP” and „5​:​AM”, which were happy accidents for the most part, I am poring over each track here until I can get it as close to perfect as possible.

RAW HOUSE: Why do you think the previous stuff were a "happy accidents"?

TIMOTHY: I don't think that I had the technical ability in performance or production to create something solid purposefully, if I'm being honest. I was working from the ground up trying to figure out how to make things sound alright, let alone how I wanted them, so it was more a series of experiments where the successes were kept, rather than pre-planned ideas.

RAW HOUSE: But you don't necessary feel like they were failures in general?

TIMOTHY: No, I don't think that they were failures. I am proud of the songs on that EP, and I am proud of „5​:​AM”. I just think that they won't really ever match up musically to what I plan to create in the future. And that's probably a good thing - I never want what I've made in the past to be as good as what I'm making now, I want to constantly improve.

RAW HOUSE: Has Perth been good for you as an artist so far?

TIMOTHY: Yes and no - it's been difficult to find other musicians to play with, for a start - i did about a month ago, but I doubt that'll happen again. That's led me to plan out my next work (AFTER what I'm soon releasing) to use drum samples and pitched-down guitar so that I can emulate a full band. I'm going to take this on on my own. However, I have been given good opportunities to play - I have only ever played one live set, of two songs (Mistakes and Love I Swear It) in late February, as part of a monthly experimental music show in my town. The experimental music scene and general local live music scene is very vibrant here and it is very positive.

RAW HOUSE: What are you listening to right now? What would you personally recommend?

TIMOTHY: Lately I've been listening to a lot of Boards of Canada, particularly „Geogaddi” - „Dawn Chorus” is an amazing song. As well as that, „Flim” by Aphex Twin. On the flipside I've also been really getting into The Strokes, which is, I think, influencing the slightly harder-edged approach i want to take in the near future - balancing the atmosphere I want and a rougher sound is something I think about quite often.

RAW HOUSE: Since you’ve started your project a few months ago – what do you feel you need to improve from your output? What are the things that you feel would make your releases even more enjoyable?

TIMOTHY: I think my production still needs to improve, and I feel that my voice still needs to improve - I hold a lot of tension in my throat, maybe cause I'm kind of anxious all the time, and this stops me from hitting higher notes easily, especially in chest voice. I wish I could pay fora singing teacher, but i recently fucked up my car and have to pay for repairs for that... But anyway. Yes. I think that better vocals and production would help. As well as this, I feel that I need to spend more time poring over the lyrical content - „Mistakes” is fun to sing because I know the words have meaning. For songs like „Queer”, it's still fun, but more vague. Honestly Hozier is one of my lyrical inspirations - the images he conjures up are very vivid.

RAW HOUSE: Where do you see yourself in the next five years?

TIMOTHY: That's a tough one. What I want to be is a touring musician in a band, performing and recording songs that make people think and feel and shit, with my boyfriend coming along with me as I tour, not having to have a day job. What's more likely is me working as a primary teacher for lowish pay, living in a cheap apartment with my boyfriend, with us both working full time. I know what I'd prefer, so I'm trying to work hard at it.

RAW HOUSE: Finally - what’s in store for Timothy in the not too distant future? What should people expect from you after „Worth Your Salt?” is out ?

TIMOTHY: After „Worth Your Salt?” I'm hopefully going to advertise that a bit, maybe pay for my Facebook page to spread some awareness. I'm making a music video for Love I Swear It right now, composed of old royalty-free video clips stuck together to roughly fit the narrative of the song. I'm hoping that this will garner some interest in my music before my next release, which will probably be a full-length. As well as this, I'm flexing my experimental side a bit with Polish musician Epiglottis, so I'm excited to see how that turns out as well. I'm hoping to get a solid band together, also.

Interview conducted on 15st of April, 2017 For more Timothy’s music go to: https://tcharles.bandcamp.com/