#actually it's not really a spoiler hold on

[1thesewordsaremyown1]

I've been going back and forth over whether what we've seen in spoilers is actually going to happen or of its a fake out. Read below the cut for spoilers/speculation/ramblings.

I still maintain that with what we know and what we've seen in the show (eg. Tim with post-Shannon regret showing that he doesn't like killing off major characters, the fact that the show loves to do dramatic twists, etc) that narratively it is likely that Bobby doesn't actually die. Not to mention, if they wanted it to be this big shock, they did a piss poor effort of keeping it quiet. And we know they are capable of keeping things quiet - if it wasn't for buddie "journalists" with screeners who couldn't help themselves from leaking spoilers to their fans and then said fans unable to keep their mouths shut, we never would have expected Tommy to return in 8x11.

But on the other hand, Peter has said in the past that while he loves being on the show, he doesn't expect to be there forever. We don't know what's going on with him behind the scenes - for all we know, he's had enough, and he wants to leave. I guess we'll find out by the end of the season if it sticks.

The thing is, I'm torn about whether I want it to be real or a fake out. I like Bobby, I love the Bobby and Buck dynamic, especially, and I would be so sad to see him go. But on the other hand, this could very well be the kick in the pants that this show has been needing.

Think of all the potential new story lines we could have if Bobby is truly gone, especially in regards to all the characters' careers. Hen, for instance - would she step up as Captain? What would that be like for her, not only being Captain full time, but having to fill some pretty impressive shoes?

And Buck, in the instances where Hen might need someone in the Acting Captain role (say if she was sick or injured), would he decide to step up? He once said he would like to be Captain one day - would the show finally remember that and get him to start seriously thinking about it? He's certainly shown good leadership qualities this season, it would be a natural progression.

What about Chim? Next season he'll have two small kids to think about. With first the loss of his (foster) brother all those years ago and now his friend/Captain, would he start re-evaluating his life? Maybe a story line where he starts freaking out and starts being overly cautious because he doesn't want to leave two small kids without a father.

If Eddie comes back and Hen moves up, would Eddie take on the medic role full time? And if so, would Ravi stay in Eddie's place? If Eddie doesn't come back, could Ravi do what TK did in Lonestar and rethink what he wants in his career and decides he might actually want to move over into the paramedic side of things? Either way, we'd get to keep Ravi as a main.

And that's the other thing. With no Bobby and potentially no Eddie if he stays in Texas, the budget is suddenly open to bring in new mains for the show. New mains = new back stories to explore, new interactions with the existing mains, and new stories to tell. We could finally move on from the stagnant recycling of storylines and get something fresh. I mean, sure, there's always the possibility they could do some of these things without killing Bobby off (new stories/characters), but they've been reluctant to do so so far, so I'm not exactly holding out hope. Peter, especially, being one of the stars of the show, would cost a lot of money to keep. If he goes, that money could go a long way into bringing in more characters. I especially noticed it from season 7, but the gradual decrease in supporting characters in 911 has really been a detriment, because they really fleshed out the show, made the world of 911 seem bigger, more fleshed out, and not so insular among only the 118. Carla, for example, was a great supporting role that just disappeared and has made me on more than one occasion miss her presence.

Personally, I'd love it if we got both Ravi and Tommy as mains. Now, I'm not expecting Tommy to suddenly transfer back to the 118, but you don't have to be with the 118 to be a main. Michael wasn't. Chris isn't. Nor do you need to be in every episode (again, like Chris). They could have Tommy and the 217 liaise occasionally on calls (I wouldn't expect too many helicopter rescues as they're expensive, but the 217 do ground ops as well). They could actually focus on Buck and Tommy's relationship properly this time and on Tommy's past (Buck somehow meets Tommy's father for starters). Hell, maybe get back into the closeness of the firefam within the show by having some sort of hijinks with Tommy, like him babysitting Jee and baby boy Han while the 118 are on shift or something. There's all sorts of possibilities.

So yeah, that's the dilemma. Keep a beloved character and potentially continue on with the same old, same old that's been plaguing the show for a few seasons now, or lose him and open the show up to a whole realm of possibility. Like I said, I'm torn.

[fanaticallyfleeky]

Come into my arms

Buck x Tommy | wc: 1,1k Not a really a spec fic but with all the spoilers and talk about [redacted] this got into my brain and now I make it everyones problem 🙃 Obviously spoilers ahead, read at your own risk!

Read here one ao3

Tommy takes one last look at the bed before he leaves the bedroom and closes the door. He leaves a small gap, not comfortable with closing it all the way. He wants to, needs to, hear if something happens. If he wakes up, and needs Tommy.

It’s not likely. After he exhausted himself, crying himself to sleep, Tommy hopes Buck will sleep through the night. 

Today was a lot, emotionally. It was draining. For everyone. But Tommy had seen the toll it was taking on Buck. Trying to stay strong for the past days, strong for Athena and May and Harry. For the rest of his team, even though everyone had someone to lean on. Buck had looked hopelessly lost. Alone. Drowning in grief and guilt. 

Radiating desperation for someone to hold him for a second. To hold him together and tell him he didn’t have to stay strong. That he was allowed to grieve. That it was not his fault. And it broke Tommy’s heart because he didn’t feel like he could be that for Buck. Tommy had no idea where they stood now. And it was not high on the priority list to ask. 

It hurt.

God, did it hurt. 

Because Bobby was a good man. One of the best. And Tommy might not have worked under him at the 118 as long as the others, but in that time Captain Nash had made a big impact on Tommy’s life. Like he had done for so many others. He had seen in Tommy what Tommy himself hadn’t known he needed at the time. He had set Tommy free in more ways than Bobby couldn’t have possibly known. 

And with a sickening blow, Tommy had realised earlier today that he had never actually thanked the man for that. And now he never will.

Seeing the 118 today, supporting each other, leaning on each other, hurt as well. He didn’t feel like he was supposed to be there. Not his place, not his family. 

Of course, Howie had hugged him, Eddie had nodded to him, and Hen had told him she was glad he was there. That it was right he was there with them. But he felt once again like the intruder. The outsider. 

Buck had only stared at him. Empty eyes, red-rimmed and dark circles. Tommy had wanted to walk up to him, gather him in his arms, hold him. Until Buck was ready to hold himself again. But he hadn’t. 

Because he had no idea where they stood.

Afterwards came the wake at the station. It was beautiful. Well-organised. But Tommy mainly remembers that he hadn’t seen Buck eat a single thing the whole day. How he had stood ramrod straight, bound to break. 

And break he did. Tommy had found him, outside. Around the corner, near the wash bay. Hyperventilating. Jacket of his dress blues ripped open and tugging desperately at his tie. Only then had Tommy finally allowed himself to step in. Loosened Buck’s tie with steady hands. Coached his breathing until the hyperventilating gasps turned into broken sobs. Wiped away the tears afterwards. 

Somehow they made their way back to Buck’s place after the wake. Buck hadn’t said a word but he had looked at Tommy with those big teary eyes and Tommy had followed without hesitation. 

Tommy tried to think it didn’t sting when Maddie looked genuinely surprised to see him when she came to check up on her brother. 

In the evening he had ushered Buck into the bathroom to take a shower. Hoping it would make him feel the tiniest bit better. But with every sob he heard through the closed bathroom door, Tommy’s heart cracked a little more. 

It didn’t take long after that for Buck to succumb to sleep, exhausted and all cried out. 

“He’s asleep”, Tommy softly says walking into Buck’s kitchen, watching Maddie pack away the last of the leftovers in the fridge. Looking at her baby bump he realises he hadn’t even congratulated them. It doesn’t feel like the right moment now either.   She lacked the pregnancy glow. And not just because of the gnarly scar across her throat that made Tommy wince. So much has happened in the last months. So much he missed from a distance.

“If you want to go home to Howie and Jee,” he started carefully, “I’m planning on staying here… to keep an eye on him.” 

Maddie turns to him as he leans against the counter. For a moment she just stares at him. Intently. Like she’s waiting for him to give the correct answer to a question she didn’t ask but he is supposed to just know.  

Whatever she isn’t saying, is speaking volumes. She raises one, unimpressed, eyebrow. The unspoken ‘are you really staying this time’ echoes loudly in the kitchen. 

And he gets it. He broke her baby brother’s heart. It was foolish to think she would be happy to see him anywhere near Buck. 

Tommy squirms under her gaze and swallows, “I’ll sleep on the couch.”

The other eyebrow joins the first and he feels like no matter what he says to her, it will be wrong either way. 

He wants to tell her that he doesn’t know what to do. That everything is messed up and nothing feels right. That he still has no clue where he and Buck stand but that everything in his body is screaming at him not to leave Buck alone tonight.

He doesn’t say any of that.

But at the front door, just before she leaves she turns to him, “he has a guest room now. At least use that.” 

It feels like a consolation prize. 

Hours later, in that guest room, Tommy doesn’t think he has been truly asleep when he hears the squeaky door opening. More stuck in that weird limbo between awakeness and sleep. Slumbering because he is so goddamn tired but too vigilant to truly fall asleep. 

Soft shuffles of socked feet on the floor. The mattress dipping on his side of the bed. 

Tommy shuffles backwards. The duvet lifts and in crawls a sleep-warm body. He hums as Buck curls up into an impossibly small ball against his chest, all 6”2 folded neatly together and tucked under Tommy’s chin. 

A soft sniffle, followed by another, and another. 

A wavering voice whispers, “can I please stay here tonight?”

His arms instinctively close around Buck, thumbs caressing the soft skin, nose buried in his curls. And as he feels Buck’s breath even out, his body growing heavier in Tommy’s arms, he can’t help but think, 

“Please stay here forever”.

[jyae23]

Dark Rise Chapter 21 Crack Impressions/Assumptions

When the guy you had forced on the ground is now penetrating your tied up and sweaty body in front of a crowd AND your [Redacted] (Everyone including your [Redacted] is demanding him to thrust deeper into you.)

I redacted James's father because their relationship is a big spoiler methinks. I think enough of these out of context posts would convert one of my followers to pick up this series and I wouldn't want to ruin it for them should they decide to read Dark Rise. If they choose to read more, then that's on them y'know? Wait, fuck, it wouldn't matter anyways because I'm gonna draw my faves immediately afterwards, huh.

Omg I just realized that they both had their hands stained by each other's blood and it happens on the same day too! They're practically married now <3

"Hello, Father." (Pacat 257)

FATHER? JAMES IS YOUR SON???? The plot is plotting so hard. WAIT A MIN THE PROLOGUE IS MAKING SENSE NOW "If you felt anything for me" "If you felt anything for us" no gay just on same side. He was training like a good Steward like the rest of them :(

"Catamite"

Pause. I have never heard of that word before. The High Janissary said that with his full chest too. Omg new vocab word of the day?! Lemme look it up before listening any further— 😦

Okay, sorry, I'm slow, but I always thought that they called James "Simon's prize" because of the strength he possessed and ties to the Dark King. I didn't know that there was another meaning behind it.

James was denying those "rumors" when Marcus brought it up.

Simon's followers circle that name/title around.

The High Janissary spews some more shit about it and James refutes. It's kinda fucked up for him to say all of that about his child. I think in this moment James is 17?

James further denies being Simon's lover when Will meets him in the cell.

I feel like I'm being weird about this, but they bring it up a lot and I'm only now putting two and two together as I type this. Man, why they gotta poke the Catamite (allegedly)?

"First son died six years ago" So, James would be 11 or 12 when he became the Betrayer? He was a kid and ultimately a victim. Am I feeling bad the enemy? YEahh and it's because we got to see more of him on a deeper level than just being beautiful, strong, and cunning. (Jyae discovers empathy????)

"No one could look at him and not want to posses him." (Pacat 261).

The first time around I thought ooo JAMES YOU SHOW THEM, but on the second and third time rereading this chapter, I don't think that line was all good as I thought it was. (I still love the line, but I feel like it has more of a negative implication that a positive one?) I feel like I'm reaching, but I'm actually gonna reach more when we get to the aftercare scene (yes, I'm calling it the aftercare scene) and I dunno it feels like he's being objectified at this point. The objectification of James St. Clair. (Wow, what a sentence.) All this talk about his appearance and how people on BOTH sides throw names at him and now this idea of possessing him just make feel things.

"Not someone who holds a grudge against him in their heart." (Pacat 260).

Oh yea, because Will is the most neutral in this Hall. Taking in their previous encounters, Will has something more intense going on in that heart of his for James. It may not be a grudge, but it's something alright. The book made that fucking clear for sure.

They got me with the cup thing too. Honestly assumed it'd be something with cannibalism the way it was a secret and all. James turning the tables and playing everyone like a fiddle is so funny. Even when he's tied up and in pain, he has everyone playing his little games.

I don't think I can fully capture what I felt when Will was thrusting that stick into James's arm. Overall, I had a euphoric bookgasm for the poking. Nothing could have prepared me for that and the scene afterwards. I really hope someone went ahead and illustrated these scenes somewhere (I'm a visually learner wink wonk.)

I think it's too early for me to think about fanfics for this, especially when book three isn't even announced, but I can see a lot of fics utilizing the Horn of Truth for many reasons...

AFTERCARE

I thought Will being forced on all fours by James's magical hands wouldn't be topped, but then the public unicorn pegging scene dropped and I thought nothing could top that... AFTERCARE IN MY CELL????? I didn't ask for that nor did I think I needed that, but holy shit and what the fuck and thank you????

I live for the innuendos "You're the center of attention again. But I suppose you're used to that." (Pacat 268). "You can stick it in again." (Pacat 268).

"Unlace my shirt." (Pacat 269). James... *unlaces shirt* WILL!!! These two are always surprising me I cannot catch a break. I'm deadass because why the fuck is Will getting ANGRY for James in the next few lines??? Will treats James tenderly as if James doesn't have a high body count (KILLS).

"How many times did he try to brand you?" (Pacat 270). Will, what are you gonna do if James had an exact number? You can't even move a candle flame yet.

I was doing mental gymnastics on ways to redeem or justify James slaughtering xx amount of Stewards, but I think Will handles that well for me:

"I think what people were is less important than what they are. And what people are is less important than what they could be." (Pacat 271).

Not gonna lie, I had to reread that a few times, but I get it.

Everyone is saying the Dark King is coming. How many more times will he come? STOP COMING- Sorry. I like the eerie build up they're setting and having James, an almost unstoppable force, speak about what's about to come makes the weight of everything more dire.

James is a reborn and Will is a descendant. They're acting really suspicious together despite being on opposite sides. Pulling more shit out of my ass. Are they like previous lovers in the past or something? Wait but the High Janissary said James was was the Dark King's lover in the past, so that'd mean Will would have to be the Dark King. But how the fuck would that work? But also, didn't the Elder say something about the Lady being in love with the Dark King? Dark Rise, Dark King, Dark... Will... Unless she had a child with someone else. Or wait was that Simon who is a Descendant of the Dark King? I CAN'T REMEMBER AND I JUST WANNA READ MORE RATHER THAN LOOK BACK. SOMETHING FISHY IS GOING ON AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I usually raw-dog these posts, but I had to bust out my laptop just to gather my thoughts, and even then this post is super unorganized. I thought chapter 20 was a lot, but chapter 21 is a gift that keeps giving. I keep breaking the 4th wall, turning my head to the invisible nonexistent camera to check if the invisible nonexistent audience heard what I'm hearing and saw what I'm reading. I don't know how much more gasps I can gusp. Every time I thought they couldn't go any deeper, they went deeper (and so did the horn.)

[tizeline]

Well. Every tmnt artist has to turn them into humans eventually, I suppose.

Sorry for not posting a ton lately, I have been................. playing fire emblem three houses.............. busy............ Also I've been feeling a little burned out on art, admitedly. Don't worry, it's very much temporary! Last month was just pretty high tempo for me, expecially with the Cell Talk comic, so I just needed to take a short break from drawing to also play fire emblem but I'm getting back into an art-mood now! I decided to draw humanified turtles as a bit of a warm up basically, I've been wanting to do it for quite some time so it was just a fun little thing for me :]

Anyway, some thoughts about the designs-

A lot of people draw Leo as blonde, and I was fully intending to draw him blonde as well, but then I just wanted to see what he'd look like with brown hair instead and I just.... liked that a bit more, so he's a brunette now. Also he has dimples because of course he has dimples. And Mikey has freckles because OF COURSE he has freckles! And Donnie ALSO has freckles because he's my blorbo and I give all my blorbos freckles cuz they're neat. All of them have pretty small eyebrows except for Donnie because he fills them in with makeup. I thought for a while of how I would translate Leo's facial markings into his human design, and I ended up settling for birthmarks (also some red eyeliner cuz his face needs a bit of red on it)

[egophiliac]

So.... what are your thoughts on Ace's UM, if you haven't been asked this already?

sneaky magic for the sneakiest boy

no but really, I think it fits him really well! I had thought his UM would probably involve something kinda sleight-of-handy or pickpockety! and I looooved that it made such a nice loop-around back to episode 1. ❤️ I was. kind of half-expecting him to just run out and punch Riddle in the nose again. but instead this time 'twas he who offed the queen's head! it was great! and he did it while stone-cold terrified out of his mind! because Ace is the only remotely normal or well-adjusted person at NRC and therefore the only one who is like "we're going to literally die, this is super effed up". but he did it anyway!!!! I AM SO PROUD

[extravagav]

Too🤨 many?? Too🤨🤨🤨 many dudes????? How many dudes are there normally sanji?🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨

[nataliescatorccio]

"Why didn't you say something?" JACKIE & SHAUNA, Yellowjackets

[vaguely-concerned]

the more I play the more I think lucanis basically knows it's illario who betrayed him right from the beginning (he's had a year in the ossuary to think. not that many people knew where he was going. when you ask him 'did Illario know you'd be on that ship' his only answer is the hardest flattest 'yes' you ever heard). so it's not so much about figuring out who the traitor is (because that's ludicrous. we all know. immediately. they didn't really bother to hide it lmao) as about methodically closing off every single avenue of denial lucanis has clung to that whole time with as much or little gentleness as you might prefer until he has no choice but to admit it. because the moment he has to admit it, he'll have to do something -- feel something -- about it. and that's such a catastrophic event in lucanis' inner landscape (he has had TWO people in this whole entire world up until now and will do anything to hold on to them with a heartbreaking child-like desperation, even at and especially through the detriment of his own self) that he'd rather just. not. what if we quite simply. didn't. what if we just stayed here in the emptiness where we can both pretend you didn't hurt me in a way I should never forgive. I have so much practice in that with caterina already it's always worked out great for everyone so far. (press x to fucking doubt but that's trauma logic for you lol)

after everything illario did, so much of the storm of lucanis' emotions around it is 'what the FUCK did you get yourself tangled up in this time and how do I get you out of this mess safely'. what's worse: the fact that your brother murdered you, or that he put himself in horrible danger doing so and thus exposed you to the risk of losing him forever. lucanis' heart certainly has an opinion here and it's fucking unhinged (affectionate)

the themes of dissociation in lucanis' character in general makes me feel nuts. allllll these contradictory messy things he needs to cut off from each other because they can't coexist or be easily reconciled inside him. but all remain stubbornly true separately anyway and will have their due one day. love and resentment. tenderness and fear and rage. terror and longing. love and freedom don't coexist. the burned out golden child anthem is playing in the background. he was always caterina's favourite and he has to keep striving to deserve that dubious honour with every breath he takes and then, presumably, mercifully, some day he will die and be excused and can rest. and until now he's suppressed all the -- natural, healthy, protective! -- negative feelings that threaten the few attachment relationships he actually has, at the cost of ever actually having his needs for connection and safety met and leaving his core self imprisoned and compromised. and spite goes 'what. no. that's dumb fuck that' (*spite voice* I do not understand that and even if I did I would not respect it) and does not allow him to fall back into that, which I think is what saves his life, ultimately. it took being possessed by a demon for lucanis to even contemplate telling anyone he loves 'no' in any way, but hey. whatever gets you there right lol

lucanis is dealing with the freeze response allll the way down baby. and he was even before the ossuary, that just turbo powered it and brought it to a breaking point way before it could happen naturally. but something was going to break eventually no matter what, and I'm just glad that in the end, through the power of friendship and also pure spite, it doesn't have to be him

[myuminji]

the bride walked down the aisle to where the groom stood, and there they exchanged their vows in front of the altar...

[meamiki]

mira !!! :]

[cent-scratchnsniff]

doodles and stuff. struggled with painting until i gave up

[shorthaltsjester]

Imogen Temult, Exaltant Hope of the Red Storm

Heroes and Monsters by Penny & Sparrow // Critical Role Campaign 3

[nonamegiven96]

Jesus fucking christ, man.

[gravelsong]

ASTROTRAIN IS BEING INTERESTING AGAIN

Similarly to Thundercracker, it appears that Astrotrain does not wish to hurt humans. In fact, he sympathizes with the doctor's plight and makes it known that he doesn't enjoy doing this. Unlike Thundercracker, though, Astrotrain is ready to kill to complete his mission, without hesitation. Astrotrain describes humans as "lesser beings", yet he empathizes with their pain and commends Spike's decision as impressive. He views himself as superior above humans, but not so superior that he refuses to acknowledge their similarities and good qualities

[perhaps-in-anotherdream]

[CN] Li Zeyan’s Candlelight Date (Eng Translation)

⌚Warning⌚ This post contains detailed spoilers for a date, 烛火之约, that is yet to be released on the global server! ♡

[Translation Under the Cut]

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

【Subbed Video】

─────────────

【Chapter 1】 

After being stuck in traffic for over forty minutes on the way to the airport, I slam on the brakes once again, staring in despair at the unmoving stream of cars ahead. 

The weather outside is gloomy, the sky overcast with heavy dark clouds, and the wind howls through the crevices of the car windows. 

Even though the evening has barely fallen, the sky is already darkened completely. 

MC: Feels like it’s gonna be pouring hard... 

MC: I don’t know if Li Zeyan’s flight has been affected. 

Just as I am about to look up the flight information, his call comes in. 

LZY: I’ve arrived. 

MC: That’s great! It looks like there’s gonna be a heavy downpour outside, so thank goodness you landed on time. 

MC: On the downside, though, I’m stuck in traffic... 

LZY: Given the weather, I could guess that already. 

LZY: Don’t rush, safety first. Turn on your headlights and take your time. 

MC: Don’t worry, I promise to follow the traffic rules~ So, I must apologize to CEO Li and ask him to wait for me a little longer~ 

LZY: No worries, I’ll just take this time to think about what to make for Pudding. 

The day Li Zeyan is returning from his business trip also happens to be Pudding’s birthday, and we’ve planned to have a small celebration at home. 

As I picture Li Zeyan making a birthday cake for the little kitten, the corners of my lips involuntarily curl upwards. 

MC: Pudding’s parents are so thoughtful! The little birthday boy is blessed with the luck of tasty treats today. 

MC: Rest assured, I’ll definitely get you to Pudding safely and in one piece. 

LZY: With a certain someone “braving the wind and waves” to come pick me up, I’m already luckier than those who can’t get a cab. 

MC: Hehe, this time it’s my turn to be the prince who cuts their way through thorns and thistles to rescue the sleeping princess! 

LZY: Well, it seems like I’ll have to wait a hundred years then.

MC: ...you just told me to take my time. 

A soft chuckle transmits from the other end of the phone, and carried by the car’s stereo, it spreads through the entire space, giving me the illusion as if he is right next to me. 

LZY: It’s not contradictory. 

LZY: Even if it takes you a hundred years, I’ll still wait.

–

──────

[Tidbits]:  This conversation here is a reference to one of Li Zeyan’s earliest ASMRs, “Sleeping Beauty,” where LZY said in response to MC’s question that if he were the prince, he wouldn’t let the girl he loves wait a hundred years. Whereas, in the reverse scenario here, he tells you that if he were the sleeping princess and you the prince, he would gladly wait a hundred years (இдஇ; ) though, for a man who literally did wait 17+10000(*n) years for you— a hundred years is, well, still unbearable to think about ahah (ﾉಥ益ಥ) 

–

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

【Chapter 2】

I park the car near the exit, and as soon as I look up, I see Li Zeyan walking towards me, dragging his suitcase. 

I immediately push open the car door and run up to him, throwing myself into his arms as hard as I can. Both his hands are occupied by luggage, and I collide against him so hard that he staggers back a few steps. 

His familiar scent wraps around me securely, instantly dispelling all the tension and fatigue from the road. I nuzzle against his chest contentedly, earning a soft chuckle from above my head. 

LZY: Why the lack of courtesy right off the bat?

MC: I haven’t seen you for days, and I’ve made our big busy person wait so long. I can’t afford to be polite anymore. 

Li Zeyan smiles, lets go of the luggage, and draws me into his arms, lowering himself to rest his head on my shoulder. 

A soft sigh sounds next to my ear, and I sense how exhausted he is. I put aside my playful thoughts and stroke the back of his head. 

MC: I hoped you could get some rest after getting off the plane, but I didn’t expect this weather… 

MC: I’ll head out earlier next time! 

LZY: You already got here much faster than I expected. 

LZY: Let’s go, there’s a birthday boy waiting at home. It’s raining hard outside; I’ll drive on the way back. 

┈┈┈┈┈┈ ✄ ┈┈┈┈┈┈

As we head home, rain begins pouring down in torrents. Even with the wipers operating at their highest speed, the visibility only clears for a fleeting moment. 

Through the impenetrable curtain of rain, the emergency lights of nearby vehicles flicker faintly. The water pooling on the ground reflects the surroundings like mirrors, and the streets have transformed into an utterly bizarre kaleidoscopic labyrinth. 

I hold up my phone to record the scene outside the window when suddenly, a blinding flash of lightning splits the sky not far away, followed by a rolling thunder approaching from the distance, pressing closer and closer. 

I can’t help but shrink my neck and set my phone down. 

MC: This weather is just ridiculous… I’m sure today’s Moments posts are gonna be flooded with candid shots of the rainstorm. 

LZY: A certain someone has made significant strides. 

LZY: A few years back, you would get so nervous in this kind of weather that you’d grab onto other people’s clothes. Now, you'd just make a fuss about it on Moments. 

MC: Huh? When did I grab onto your clothes? 

I turn my head to look at him with a puzzled expression. Li Zeyan glances at me, and before he can even speak, a smile creeps onto the corners of his lips. 

LZY: That time when you asked me if I dared to like you. 

I freeze for a second, the familiar feeling of nervousness and anticipation surging to the forefront of my mind. 

Memories flood back along with the warmth of my cheeks, as I’m reminded of a similar night in the past mirroring this raging storm. 

The pitch-black darkness that descended after the power outage was so thick that one wouldn’t even be able to make out their own hand in front of them. I felt like danger, and the unknown would swallow me whole at any moment. But he was there with me, accompanying me for what felt like an eternity on that apocalyptic night. 

Back then, I felt like I couldn’t handle it on my own, so I wanted to cling to a straw, to hold onto this steady and exceptionally gentle person beside me. 

Snapping out of the reminiscence, I clear my throat to dispel my embarrassment. 

MC: Y-You don’t need to remember such things so clearly! 

MC: But come to think of it, ever since I met you, I don’t seem to have gotten rained on much. 

MC: Even if I forget my umbrella or can’t catch a ride, you always manage to “scoop” me up right on time. 

LZY: So, as a result, a certain someone has developed the bad habit of not checking the weather forecast before going out? 

MC: …It clearly taught me the good habit of how to “scoop” people up in crucial moments! 

The car stops at the intersection, waiting for the traffic light. Li Zeyan casts a glance my way, his lips curving into a smile as he strokes my head. 

LZY: Given that the person “scooping” me up is also the one I want to see, it does feel pretty good. 

His warm palm rests on my head for a moment before sliding down to my cheek with yearning. A small sense of satisfaction leaps in my heart, and I smile, poking his cheek. 

MC: I think I can understand why the prince braves countless perils to reach the princess.

MC: For this moment right now, I’m willing to endure any hardship~

–

──────

[Tidbits]:  The call-back of the apocalyptic night is from one of Li Zeyan’s earliest dates, “Doomsday Date,” where MC asks him if he’d dare to like her and if he’d dare to be by her side even if doomsday arrived – and the rest, as they say, is history, quite literally in this case ahah~ (இдஇ; ) 

–

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

【Chapter 3】

“Bzzz!” 

As I step through the doorway and flip the switch for the pendant lamp, to my surprise, the light flickers and then abruptly goes out. 

The inside of the house is instantly taken over by the dimness from outside the windows. Pudding, who was originally crouching at the door to welcome us, lets out a yelp and scurries under the table. 

My mind automatically starts concocting a horror movie scenario, and I immediately step back a few paces. 

MC: What did the power suddenly go out? It was perfectly fine before I left... 

My words are barely out of my mouth when a series of extremely bright streaks of lightning flash outside the window. 

The howling gale rattles the window frames, while the water pipes exposed to the downpour on the side of the building, pelted by large raindrops, are making peculiar noises. 

The continuous flashes of lightning project the wildly swaying shadows of the trees onto the floor, making the storm outside seem even more terrifying. 

Li Zeyan sighs and steps forward, taking hold of my hand that is frozen in mid-air. 

LZY: Are there any spare lights or flashlights in the house? 

MC: Yes, there are, in my room... 

While saying this, I clutch Li Zeyan’s arm and carefully start walking towards my room. A hand reaches out and pulls me into a familiar embrace. 

LZY: Wasn’t a certain someone “scooping people up” pretty amazingly just now? Why are you so nervous now that we’re home? 

MC: ...I guess I’ve been overdoing it with the horror movies lately, and the after-effects are still a bit strong. 

I laugh awkwardly and, relying on the dim light of the flashlight, dig out a large, bulging bag from the storage box. 

MC: Rechargeable desk lamps, some decorative fairy lights, and lanterns. 

MC: They should work if we plug them into the power bank. 

LZY: ...That’s it? 

MC: They can provide light and serve as tools to set the ambiance. Isn’t that wonderful? 

Li Zeyan turns on a palm-sized rechargeable desk lamp and releases a small sigh. 

LZY: In that case, the gift I brought you can also be included to make up the difference. 

MC: Huh? What gift? 

Li Zeyan rummages through his suitcase, takes out an exquisitely wrapped box, and gestures for me to open it. 

I lean in closer and find a very charming candle holder with a glass cover nestled inside. 

MC: It’s so beautiful! As expected, CEO Li’s eye for things can never go wrong. 

LZY: Simultaneously doing the job of adding flowers to the brocade and delivering charcoal in snowy weather一 it definitely seems to be maximizing its value.  

LZY: Come on, let’s go and light up all the lamps that we can use first. 

┈┈┈┈┈┈ ✄ ┈┈┈┈┈┈

With me “lending a hand” by holding the flashlight through the entire process, dinner and Pudding’s salmon cake are soon prepared. 

Pudding, who had been hiding in the corner this entire time, also forgets his fear under the temptation of delectable food and begins prancing around again. 

After eating and drinking to our fill, I sit on the carpet with another small blanket, light a scented candle, and carefully set it in the candle holder Li Zeyan gifted me. 

Li Zeyan then casually plops down at the foot of the bed where I’m leaning, naturally stretching out his arm for me to use as a pillow. 

I look at Pudding grooming his fur not far away and can’t help but sigh with emotion. 

MC: Time sure flies! Pudding has grown another year older. I wonder what progress he’ll make this year. 

LZY: He wasn’t very brave when he was younger, but now he, too, looks after the house on his own and appears to be fairly calm and composed. 

MC: Why did you use “too“? I suspect you’re insinuating something about someone else. 

LZY: Just stating facts. 

LZY: The way a certain someone acted when she walked into the house earlier didn’t exactly resemble the “prince“ who came to pick me up. 

I glance again at the flashes of lightning and thunder rolling outside again, scratching my cheek awkwardly. 

MC: The house just went dark all of a sudden; I wasn’t mentally prepared. 

LZY: What about now? 

LZY: Are you still scared? 

I turned sideways to watch him. The dancing candlelight paints his side profile in a warm glow, and the subtle fragrance of the scented candle melds into his calm gaze, making me gradually relax. 

I hug his arm and pull him into my arms, beaming a wide smile at him. 

MC: I have my “fragrant princess“ in my arms now, and I fear neither getting swept by wind nor being battered by rain any longer. [3]

LZY: Are we sure about who’s in whose arms? 

MC: Does it really make a difference who’s in whose arms? 

Li Zeyan gives me a look that says “whatever you say,” and I smile victoriously at having my way before turning to glance at the pitch-black darkness outside the window.  

The small lights in the room are mirrored on the glass, reminiscent of stars, blurring into a cluster of halos by the unrelenting rain. 

Serenity and turmoil are separated by only a wall. I grasp his wrist and tilt my head, pillowing into his palm and nuzzling against it. 

MC: Luckily, you came back today. Otherwise, I would have definitely dragged you into “simmering a pot of telephone congee” with me all night long. [4]

LZY: That wouldn’t have been too bad either. 

MC: Well, that’s true, but it would have made me seem like I haven’t grown at all... 

I raise my head and look into his slightly puzzled gaze, feeling a little embarrassed as I lower my voice. 

MC: I’m clearly not a child anymore, and many of the things I used to fear shouldn’t be a big deal now. 

MC: Yet when running into situations where I’m not entirely confident, I can’t help feeling a little afraid. 

MC: For instance, a pitch-dark empty house, not being able to find the kitten, and a thunderstorm that I don’t know when will end. 

MC: I still can’t seem to be like you, to be able to keep myself from thinking the worst regardless of the kind of situation I’m confronted with... 

I soliloquize in a whispered tone, and the palm I’m resting my head on suddenly moves. I look up, and my fingers are immediately swept up in a reassuring warmth.

Li Zeyan is pillowing himself on my bolster, covered by a blanket that is clearly not big enough for him, creating for a rather comical scene. Yet, I find myself solely captivated by his extraordinarily serious gaze. 

He quietly watches me like this for some time before finally opening his mouth to respond. 

LZY: Then just be afraid. 

MC: ...Huh? 

LZY: Building courage doesn’t mean you should be absolutely fearless. 

LZY: If you have no reaction to the unknown and uncontrollable, that, on the contrary, is dangerous. 

LZY: For a dummy, knowing how to dodge in the right direction at a critical moment is also progress. 

He strokes the back of my hand meaningfully, and I clasp his fingers even more tightly in tacit understanding. 

In moments of fear and anxiety, I always want to hold onto something, to reassure myself that I’m not facing it alone. 

And this man in front of me, as fortune would have it, always happens to be within my reach, catching my insecurities and leading me along slowly. 

I think back to the first time I “grabbed onto” him, the gentleness in his tone that I had rarely seen, and I can’t help but laugh. 

MC: Well then, it seems I’ve been making progress since the first time I grabbed onto your clothes. 

LZY: Mm-hmm, it hasn’t been easy. 

MC: But I can only advance a little bit at a time. I’ve kept you waiting for so long. 

The corners of his lips curl up slightly, and his eyes, sparkling with a smile, gently embrace me. 

LZY: This isn’t work; nobody is asking anything from you. 

LZY: If you’re afraid, just light up a lamp.

–

──────

[Tidbits]

[3] LI ZEYAN WRITERS!!! CRIES AT THE SACRIFICE I HAD TO MAKE AND HOW THE BEAUTY OF THE WORDPLAY JUST GETS LOST IN TRANSLATION HERE 😭 anywho, as you might’ve already noticed, “rescuing the sleeping princess“ theme and the “seeming“ role reversal has been one of the running themes of this date. The term used here is 软香 (lit. meaning soft fragrance), which is usually used to refer to the delicate scent of a woman or a woman in general and, in the context of the times, a palace beauty. The full term MC uses here is 软香在怀 (lit. meaning having ‘soft fragrance’ in one’s arms), which also conveys a deep emotional closeness, a sense of security and comfort as scent is something very sensitive. What the writing does here is kill three birds with one stone— (i) conveying MC’s “prince and princess role reversal“ quip, while also delivering the emotions of the candlelight monologue two sentences prior, i.e., (ii) the fragrance melding into his calm gaze, the vivid imagery of her sensitivity to his presence itself, (iii) the reassuring effect of his being. 

[4] I’m gonna cry; this is such an adorable expression haha 😭 the term MC uses here is “煲电话粥,” which really does mean “simmering telephone congee.” The idea of it is to have a marathon phone call with sb, but it’s more intimate— similar to how simmering sth can take a long time and porridge essentially is a comfort food 😂 

–

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

【Chapter 4】

The night is dark, and the rain seems to have weakened a bit. I hug the blanket and squeeze onto the small bed with Li Zeyan. No matter in which position we lay down, most of our bodies are pressed against each other. 

I watch the person beside me becoming a part of the scene I’ve been familiar with since my childhood days, and for a long time, I find myself unwilling to close my eyes. 

MC: It feels so surreal to have you and Pudding together at my place. 

MC: It’s like having guests at home, but at the same time, it feels like welcoming new members to the family. 

LZY: So, which one do you hope I am? 

MC: I’ve long regarded you as the latter in my heart, obviously. 

MC: However, this situation makes me seem like I’m not being a gracious host... 

MC: Having to deal with the bad weather is one thing, but who knew the electricity in the house would be unstable at a critical moment, and now my bed isn’t big enough either. 

I look up at the small pink pillow under Li Zeyan’s head and sigh softly. Li Zeyan, however, just smiles calmly and brushes aside the hair falling over my face. 

MC: Be careful when you roll over. If you’re afraid of falling off, just hug me a little tighter~ 

LZY: [i’m cRY at how he just plays along with you haha] It’s certainly something to be afraid of. 

Li Zeyan says this as he gets up to turn off the lights, and the room is plunged into darkness once again. 

I reach out my arms towards him and am immediately swept back into his arms. 

MC: Thank you, CEO Li~ How about I repay you with a goodnight kiss? 

LZY: That’s it? 

MC: Then what else do you want? 

I blink my eyes at him, and suddenly, he lifts his hand to cover my sight. 

A soft warmth captures my lips, swallowing my confusion. 

He holds me too tightly in the square of his arms, and his broad palm accidentally presses on my nose, causing my already erratic breathing to become even more difficult to maintain. 

I punch him indignantly, and Li Zeyan finally moves his hand away, his fingers cradling my face. 

LZY: Didn’t you say you wanted to repay me? 

MC: T-This isn’t what I had in mind! 

LZY: Is this not good? 

His warm finger pads caress the side of my face in a back-and-forth motion, leaving me with no refuge to escape but to gaze into his smiling eyes. 

LZY: Instead of letting your imagination run wild every time you’re scared, why not think about something that can put your mind at ease?  

LZY: For example, me. 

LZY: So, consider this as collecting a tip in advance to cover your memories.  

A soft chuckle drifts from above me, and he lifts my face again. With the last hint of light also overlaid, I close my eyes, welcoming this novel memory pertaining to the night’s darkness. 

┈┈┈┈┈┈ ✄ ┈┈┈┈┈┈

The next morning, the sky finally clears up. 

The entire city looks as if it has taken a bath. Under the early morning sunlight, there are glittering lights refracted by water droplets everywhere. 

I summon every bit of my self-control and more to extract myself from Li Zeyan’s warm embrace and rise early to make breakfast. 

Originally, I planned to have him take the day off and recover from jet lag, but as soon as he gets out of bed, he receives a call from LFG, saying there is an urgent matter that needs to be dealt with in person. 

I watch as a certain someone at the dining table finishes his breakfast with a sullen look on his face and can’t help but burst into laughter. 

MC: Who knew even CEO Li could show such a “rebellious” expression about having to work overtime. 

LZY: ...It’s just that I haven’t gotten over the jet lag yet.  

MC: Who told you not to sleep obediently last night? 

I stand up with a laugh before he can glare at me and push his suitcase to the door for him. Li Zeyan dons his coat, seems to hesitate for a moment, and then turns back to look at me. 

MC: What’s wrong? 

LZY: Nothing. 

MC: It doesn’t seem like you’ve left anything behind, have you? 

I look around to check while speaking, but I realize that Li Zeyan has kept his gaze trained on me, with no intention of searching for anything. 

I blink my eyes, and an adorable guess bubbles up in my heart. 

MC: Could it be that... CEO Li is unwilling to leave? 

Li Zeyan grips the handle of the suitcase, averts his eyes, and smiles. 

LZY: Let Pudding stay at your place for one more day. 

MC: No worries, we’ll get along perfectly. 

He doesn’t give a direct answer to my question, so I take it as his tacit assent and continue along with his words. 

LZY: He ate quite a lot last night, so feed him less cat food today. 

MC: Understood~ 

LZY: Be careful with the electricity today, and if you run into any issues, reach out to me right away. 

MC: Uh-huh, anything else you want to remind me of? 

I stare at him, smiling giddily. Li Zeyan opens his mouth, but in the end, he just displays a helpless expression and says nothing. 

The rare instance of not being able to find the words to say, the rare moments of being dumbstruck and not knowing how to reply, the rare scenario of dragging his feet about going to work... 

All of this shows that he is really unwilling to leave. 

I smile even happier and tiptoe up to lock my arms around his neck.  

Li Zeyan seems a bit puzzled, but he promptly supports my waist and arches an eyebrow, waiting for me to continue. 

MC: Hehe, consider this as a tip you’re paying in advance. 

MC: This way, whenever you feel overwhelmed in the future, you will think of only me. 

I mimic his words from last night, and even reach up to muss his hair. 

LZY: Little copycat. 

Li Zeyan seems to want to resist this “childish” act subconsciously, but his arms betray his honest feelings and draw me in even tighter. 

He looks at me with a silly smile on my face, about to say something when I suddenly feel a tickle on my ankle, as if something furry is rubbing against it. 

Just as I’m about to look down, my face is pinched by someone. 

I’m compelled to raise my head and see the sunlight falling on Li Zeyan. 

The locks of hair hanging over his forehead and eyelashes are all bathed in dazzling, golden-bright luster. He reminds one of a big cat who has just woken up, making people irresistibly want to get closer to him. 

And he does exactly as I wished, taking the initiative to bring this warmth to me. 

The distance between us is reduced to zero, and I naturally close my eyes, welcoming this kiss infused with the warmth of the sunlight. 

Even if a person grows accustomed to the humidity of this city, they will still rejoice when the sky clears and the sunshine beams down. 

Even for those who can see the person they love every day and kiss them whenever they want, they will still find that any small separation feels too long. 

The meow of the kitten rises from our feet, as if it also wants to participate in this wordless goodbye. I gently bite Li Zeyan’s lips, and he, rather reluctantly, pulls back just a bit. 

MC: Mr. Customer, you’re being too generous with your tip. 

With his eyes cast down, he continues to gaze at me, his breath still lingering at the edge of my lips. 

LZY: Because I’ve already fulfilled the conditions you set. 

LZY: Now that I’ve paid double the tip, I’m asking for an upgrade on the terms. 

He raises an eyebrow, as if he is genuinely negotiating with me. 

At such proximity, my mind is already a muddled mess, yet I still manage to capture the answer he desires from the look of yearning in his eyes. 

I strive to muster my willpower, rise on tiptoe, and kiss his lips again.

MC: Then you must work diligently and clock out early... 

MC: And who knows, perhaps I’ll suddenly appear when you’re missing me?

──────────────────────────────────────────

[egophiliac]

I know we're not on the Hearts chapter but, I have a feeling the SSR will be Cater? But also him having the tear animation, since I have a feeling his dream will be a bit like Ruggie's q-q

I'm leaning towards either Cater or Ace, personally! Trey and Deuce have kinda already had their character arcs -- though someone else did mention to me that they thought it might be Trey, because so far all the vices have gotten one. though that might just be coincidence. we'll find out I guess!

my red-string-on-corkboard theory is that Ace is gonna get his arc + UM during whatever goes down with Grim, so while I could be completely wrong, I think it'd be nice if it were Cater's time to shine! ...also I am VERY curious as to what his dream is gonna be. 👀 like, I don't think he's gonna be all angsty or anything, he's a pretty cheery guy even though he pretends to be more vapid than he is, but...what would he be like if he were less. y'know.

(also I kind of want him to get the focus just because I think it'd be a shame if all he got was a super-quick 'oh his dream is to have a billion followers or whatever, now let's go on to the next person'. c'mon Twst. give him some love.)