#actually didnt even wanna watch it in the 1st place
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my father telling me how scared he was when i ran away from the house but i cant express how scared i was 2 b in the house
hey, whats up w/that?
#whenever we ‘hang out’ he likes 2 make the topic as depressing as possible by always talking abiut the past#& it is the most annoying shit ever i will not lie BC I DONT WANT 2 TALK ABOUT DEATH & THE ABUSE EVERY TIME I SPEAK 2 U#yk? thag makes sense in my head#anyways he started talking abiut how terrified he was when i had ran away multiple times a couple yrs ago & when i say a couple i mean#i have no idea how long ago bc memory is a bitch#but it had 2 b like middle school - sophmore?#multiple times & like i just wanna shake him bc LITERLLY WHAT & WHO DO U THINK I WAS RUNNING AWAY FROM#GODDAMNN I H8 BING THE ONLY PERSON IN THIS HOUSE WHO CAN EXPRESS EMOTIONS & NOT LET THEM EFFECT HOW I VIEW THE OTHER#‘oh u ran in the park u ran in the park’ i didnt run in the fuckinggppaaarrkrkkkk AAAAAAAAAA I MET A NICE LADY WHO HAD A GOAT IN THE#SPARTMENTS I FRIECIENTED OFTEN WHEN I WAS YOUNGER#i cant express how safe the goddamn goat lady & her kid made me feel vs my parents who started hunting 4 me#like ive been dragged home so many times im not going through that shit again#i miss the goat the mom & the kid we were just chilling @ like midnight 4 a bit#did this turn in2 a vent? idk#i do this a lot ill prolly delete this soonish when im kore calm#bc rn i want 2 chuck bricks in my laundry machine & watch them fly out & hit whatever#im going back 2 watching anime if i have 2 talk 2 1 other person i will actually explode#like irl person not online the silly gay ppl in my phone r super cool & amazing & i love them#im srry 4 bing a dick btw#i cant explain it i mean i could but i cant im just my brain is telling me eveyr1 h8s me & MAN i h8 it when it does#so im just frightened & by golly & am i havign a cheery time yipyipyip#typing in tags is sm easier than in a post bc i dont think most ppl read tags lol#the more i think about my past the more i wonder wtf am i doing here#bc how did i even get out of the house in the 1st place & then ontop of that was able 2 hide#like what……#bc they were fucking grabbing me n shit & they have CARS like i didnt go in the park i walked the sidewalks HOW DID I MOT GET CAUGHT??#MULTIPLE TIMES??? LIKE I ‘ran away’ MULTIPLE TIMES#i didnt exactly run away tho bc i didnt want them 2 file police shit i didnt eant 2 deal w/that & also hirt the pll i stayed over w/#so i always went back. obviously blehhh#ug hj hhhh my heads hurting again this is like the 4th day in a row :((
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𝑶𝑪𝑬𝑨𝑵 𝑬𝒀𝑬𝑺 (𝒇𝒖𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒈𝒖𝒓𝒐 𝒎𝒆𝒈𝒖𝒎𝒊 𝒙 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓)
02: somebody I used to know.
MASTERLIST.
january 1st, 2018.
----
suguru saved me from the awkward silence and wiggly eyebrows from satoru. "y/n! come help me set up the table, please!" "coming!" i bolted out of there. phew, at least im free from embarrassment now. . once i got in the kitchen, yuji and nobara were arguing about who was going to eat the most food. suguru handed me the utensils that went on the table. i realized hadn't talked to him since i got home. he gently patted my head instead of ruffling my hair like satoru. "how was your visit to the ice rink?" he asked, gently smiling at me. "It was good, until i hit my head and fell on my butt." suguru chuckled at my defeated tone. i started to set the table, placing the chopsticks, spoons, etc in front of every seat. i watch as yuji and nobara approach him, talking to him comfortably. i didnt know they were friends with megumi. he seems like the closed off type, especially now.
----
soon, shoko arrives and everyone eats. i have to admit, my brother sure can cook. im starting to think hes like satoru's malewife..anyways, after everyone finished eating, we had a drawing, and whoever drew the short stick had to wash dishes while everyone else got to play uno. God was NOT favoring me today. there were two short sticks, and guess who got them! me and megumi. FREAKING MEGUMI. you know what? it cant get more awkward than this.... right?
wrong.
here, we stood right beside each other, shoulder touching shoulder, leg touching leg. i wanted to crawl in a hole and disappear. the worst part was, he wasn’t even bothered by it! he didn’t even acknowledge it! surely, if i was him, i’d at least be stealing glances! oh, well, maybe he isnt that kind of guy. he was never interested in stuff like that. the two of us stood at the kitchen sink, washing dishes. the entire time, i was wondering how to start a conversation and barely got anything done! megumi had done most of it. now he probably thinks im useless! he’ll never associate himself with someone so unhelpful. “so,” i started, lips trembling. he glances at me. how come his eyelashes are so long? does he use mascara? “how..how have you b-been lately?” i wanted to curse myself. who the hell stutters nowadays!? “alright. what about you?” i could feel my shoulders tensing. i had heard his voice earlier, but now, im really paying attention to it. just thinking about it makes my stomach do axles. “good, actually.” i smiled, desperate to keep myself from squealing. minutes past, he hasnt said anything after that. okay, you dont wanna talk to me, cool. fine. whatever. (squealing) part of me wanted yuji and nobara to come in and start being annoying to break the ice. hell, maybe even satoru would do. after what seemed like decades, we finally finished washing the dishes. i sighed in relief, but i couldnt have a moment of grace before my heart nearly jumped out of my chest. i felt a napkin on my cheek, wiping soap off my face. “sorry,” he muttered. kill. me. please. “you had soap on your face.” i laughed awkwardly while he just looked at me, “really? i-uhm, i didn’t know! thanks.” what the hell, y/n?? what is your problem??
yuji and nobara ran towards me and megumi, bombarding us with a fury of words i didnt understand. something along the lines of, “guess what?? i won against mr. gojo!” “no, kugisaki cheated!” “the hell? i didnt cheat! all of you just suck!” “cheater cheater, pumpkin eater!” “grow up!” megumi frowned at their antics. “idiots” he muttered.
an: hey guys sorry for the short chapter😔i kinda rushed bc i have to gts early bc i have school tmrw. but i will be posting tomorrow or the day after that! it normally takes me two days (4 hours total) to write this much anyway
TAGLIST: @fillmeup6969 @morgyyyyy @kasumitenbaz (OPEN)
#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen#megumi fushiguro#megumi x reader#gojo satoru#geto suguru#nobara kugisaki#yuji itadori#fushiguro x reader
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guess I'm on weekly release now. ep 40 that must have been the most confusing battle for megumi. getting his ass kicking planning to get hit just so he can get another hit in and then his opponent stabs himself through the head. i was not expecting this much characterization from jogo. like usually you can tell which characters are going to be important based on how "cool" the mangaka makes their visual design and jogo looks like a normal flunky but he has a fully fleshed out character. sukuna and jogo are having a naruto style heart to heart wtf.
ah i wanna watching gojo go feral again what ep was that... ep 33 huh was it that far back? guess this whole arc is more about the fallout of gojo being sealed. damn yeah who animated that cut with the arm. the animation for this series really is top notch all around but especially the fights, i think jjk has cemented it's place as best animated fights i in any anime i have ever seen. satoru-chan is so manically happy to be fighting. wow this episode feels so much longer than it actually is.
41: well at least sukuna is having fun. and he took an interest in megumi, this can't end well for megumi.
I wonder why the author made jujutsu high be 4 years. for even 1st years its essentially on job training with them already being put to work. I do wonder how much schooling they're actually getting. and then narratively at this point there aren't even 3rd years and when i checked the wiki 4th year characters dont exist. and then with nanami leaving, originally i thought he then went to college but he's a lot younger than i initially though and most office jobs want more than highschool. so does jjk give you a university degree at the end? i know japan has 4 year universities but do they do 2 year associate degrees? just an all round weird decision.
i started out curious why people were mad about the sukuna fight and now im reading the manga i guess
yuuji: I don't need purpose i'm going to be a cog in the machine
huh itadori is actually choso's brother. huh. but the whole thing with the cursed womb fetuses was that they were never born. i dont know what is going on here. and why didn't choso recognize the stitches earlier. if brain dude is swapping bodies then the genetic material like gametes should be changing or is the implication that yuuji is also made from cursed energy/weird human experimentation. ... panda's right yuji really is attracting older brothers.
*squints* is that kazakstan????? when did kazakstan become a world superpower???? idk if its the translation but im having trouble understanding. kenjaku changed people into being more suitable vessals and to give non sorcerers cursed techniques? because that's not what the text says. then was does the remote activation do? and why did he need mahito's technique? it wasn't garunteed he'd be able to absorb mahito. i cant make sense of this.
poor megumi just got dragged headfirst into clan politics.
does the culling game apply to all cursed technique users or just ones brain dude implanted?
145: instrumentality??????? instrumentality. -_-
maki's new design is goated, love the sleeves. i like her more i hope she pisses off more men. i also finally noticed that meimei isn't wearing a dress, it's a tricked out onsie. i love that design
152. suguru was too pure hearted. see you can totally get away with mass murder you just need to play the politics game.
alright my curiosity is sated. not like i was watching jjk for the plot anyways.
powered by children lol. madoka level harvest negative emotion energy as a renewable fuel source.
i think i get why people were saying the zenin clan is kinda incest-y
huh is gege trying to say gojo taught sukuna about love.
so sukuna just ate his own mumified corpse's head, im getting that right?
Saw someone compare gojo to achilles (so geto would be patroclus?) And im mad i didnt think of that first
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tbh.. STORY TIME ASAPPPP AT THIS POINT- lore update is so needed rnnn 🤧
♡
I WARNED Y'ALL THIS WOULD BE LONG SO BARE WITH I APOLOGISE
we're gonna call this man mikey because i dont fancy exposing him to all 1.4k of y'all x
am i writng this while hes sleeping with his face in my tiddies ?YES I AM don't question me guys
important things you gotta know
we live together at uni so he is my housemate (12 people in total in my house)
we are the exact same people just different genders its scary we literally think the same way, we have very few differences
in first semester we weren't very close we would make small talk in the living room and kitchen but i wanted to be friends with him SOOOOO bad 😭
i started liking him at the start of the second semester (feb 1st lets say)
so. when i came back after second semester he was just acting different? he was very flirty, he would always be in the kitchen or living room when i was there as if he knew my routine, he would always manage to find me on nights out ??, his friend would constantly tease him and tell mikey to invite me out to here they were going IN FRONT OF ME. so ofc i was a bit like ??
but i was also kinda happy because we finally became friends YAY
so i told my friend amelia how he was acting (who i also live with she was the first friend i made at uni <3) - and she was like GRACE I HAVE A THEORY THAT HE LIKES YOU
now i didn't believe her because the whole of the first semester he was seeing this girl. her name is also grace (i hope you know that is the most gut wrenching part of the story to me its so foul). and i didnt know what was happening with them, she was never his gf but yeah... so obvs i didnt want to assume they were over i didn’t wanna interfere if i wasn’t sure
fast forward to VALENTINES DAY... my friend went out to the club and i stayed home with mikey and a couple other people and he was sad because other grace told him that she didn't want to be with him and he'd have to wait 6 months to a year for her to want to be with him ??? i was like okay schedule
so me and my other housemate were like man it’s okay it’ll work out just chill out today (obvs i was a bit sad because i liked him but they were new found feelings for him so i was just like 🤷♀️) and at some point i said “i don’t wanna go to my 9am what if i just stay up and watch movies all night” and he goes “i will stay with you all night and watch whatever you want and i will come with you to your 9am” and that kinda ?? jumpscared me because we’d only just become friends so i was like wow alright
the whole night he was very touchy ?? not in a way that made me uncomfortable dw i was literally like 🤭
meanwhile amelia was at the CLUB and she found people we live with and she interrogated them and found out he liked me FR FR ?? so she came back and told me 😭 and then i let her go to bed and we spent the rest of the night together 😔 it was genuinely so fun ?? wym we went on a 5am walk and watched the sun rise. also he studies LAW and i do psychology but he stayed up all night and watched y fav movies and came with me to a lecture for a subject he doesn’t even study ????
but yeah if i typed out the whole night we’d be here forever but it was so fun 10/10 memory apart from when he said “i think im in love with you” because i showed him my manga collection that was doing too much LMAO
SO. fhe next weeks after that were 10/10 we’d talk and message everyday, watch movies, we’d literally stay up until 7am talking to each other and just ☹️ quality time yknow and he genuinely. started to act like my boyfriend. i’m not kidding it was like ?? opposite fwb 😭 it was all the things your boyfriend would do without anything intimate ?? like we could cuddle and walk places holding hands and i wore his clothes and slept in each others room ?? odd situation but yeah he made his feelings very obvious 🎀 wym i look ugly asf while im hungover and you wanna tell me i “look fucking beautiful” like actually die
and then suddenly he just stopped 😁 he still saw me and messaged me and spoke to me everyday without fail but he acted as just my friend and i started TWEAKING YALL 😭 so. i told amelia i was like girl what do we do im sad
she did what she does best and interrogated his friend on a night out again 😭 basically found out 😁 that he still liked other grace !! and was still talking to her !! and he also liked me !! and didn’t know what to do !! YAAAAYY 😝 (i wanted to cry in the club i was so sad)
so. we get back after said night out and he’s like GRACE COME WATCH DEATH NOTE WITH ME 🙂↕️. and i accidentally saw his phone OH LORD JESUS CHRIST he was just. telling other grace how he loves her and how he wants to be with her and how he wants her back 😭 did i get sad ? YES ‼️ and when i get sad i go very quiet and he noticed 🎀 eventually we ended up talking about it after a weird heart to heart convo ?? idk it was 5am and we were starting to get a hangover shit got deep
“alex (his friend) thinks he knows what’s best for me and he is right, for once. i should be with you and i want to be but im not going to do that and im sorry” THEY HIT THE PENTAGON WHAT THD FUCK DO YOU MEAN 😭😭🙏
and then he was just like “don’t be sad about me” what do you mean you have genuinely treated me as your girlfriend for weeks what the fuck do you mean don’t be sad i’m actually irate ? so i said i wanted to go to bed because i was sad and tired and he FOLLOWS ME TO MY ROOM AND PROCEEDS TO ASK WHY IM SAD ???? MIKEY DIE RN 🙏
i just said like. you know why and he pulls out. the most insane monologue i’ve ever heard. he sat there and said “im just so in love with her and im completely enamoured with her and it pains me to see her in every lesson knowing i can’t be with her because of my own behaviour it hurts so much” while im literally lying on my bed about to cry ? 😭
so drunk me asked him why i wasn’t enough (idk i got insecure lmao) and he pulls out another monologue about how much he loves me 😍 and everything he’s ever wanted to say to me since the day we moved in 😍 and he didn’t because he was shy 😍 and said the most. romantic things to me 😍 and i was like OH BUT YOU JUSY SAID YOU DINT WANT ME WHAT ARS YOU DOING ?
he then proceeds to ask if i want to come and sleep in his room because i dont like being alone when im sad. SO YOU JUST REJECTED ME. AND NOW YOU WANT TO CARRY ON AS WE WERE ? i said no and asked him to leave because gang do not lead me on whilst you still like other grace and then carry on acting like my man after you reject me
so. he behaved normally as my friend for a week. we messaged every day still and hung out but it was just friends.
guys. i am not kidding. from the start of march until now. he has been consistently flirting with me and acting the exact same way. ive had people ask me if he is my boyfriend because its not like he only does this in private he does it in front of other people too like he fully holds my hand and stands with his arms around me etc etc you get the idea and when i say no he isnt people are like girl wtf stand up LMAO
like we will go out and come back and sleep in each others rooms and he will like. do this thing where he’s like. i need to tell you something AND HE WONT DO IT AND HE’LL ALMOST BRING UP THINGS THAT HAPPENED BETWEEN US AND RHEN HE PUSSYS OUT AND ITS JARRING
he will say insane shit infront of people too ? once we were sat in the kitchen and he was like. HAVE YOU GUYS EVER FALLEN IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE THAT IS THE SAME PERSON AS YOU ITS SUCH A DEEP CONNECTION ITS HAPPENED TO ME and he just stared at me and i was like please fuck off ?
he also saw my friend in the club a couple weeks ago and told her hes in love with me and how he wants to be with me ? and he has told about 5 other people that from when this all first happened to now ? but he still. messages. other grace. AND SHE WANTS NOTHING TO DO WITH HIM ? his friends told me she doesnt want to be with him anymore so its completely one sided and im like. if you dont want me dont act like you fucking want me ? and if you do then please do something about it because im going insane !!
he will fully be like. i wanna kiss you and shit while he’s literally holding me in his lap and he just. won’t. abd i’m like guys am i ugly or something because what.
i really cannot put into words how he treats me its fully just. boyfriend through and through but oh yeah dw we're cuddling and you gotta check her snap score thats fine dw xx ik y'all are gonna giggle at me for this but im genuinely. i fall so hard for people and its so hard for m to get over them and to an extent it means its hard for me to call them out on disrespect esp like this.
but yeah key points
- other grace hasn’t wanted to date him since february (info relayed via his friend 🙏)
- he treats me like THAT. but won’t ever do anything more
- seems like he tries to talk about it but pussys out
- im going insane 🩷
- maybe he’s just an asshole because once i saw other grace in the club in first semester before all this and she was crying and told me he was talking to another girl and i forget that story all the time
#you received a message ✶#AND I ALMOST GOT IVER HIM. AND SOMETHING HAPPENED AND IT REVERSED MY PROGRESS#forever angry at myself for that#but yeah yall can laugh i just. god this is such a weird situation
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Me at the Cinema when Natasha died , Tony died , Steve went back to Peggy and Natasha didn’t get a funeral
#this video isn't mine!!!#i found this on twitter#credits to the owner#you are amazing for editing this#endless endgame bashing#literally was so hyped for the movie#and bought 3 tickets for myself#little did i know#i didnt want to watch it a 2nd time#actually didnt even wanna watch it in the 1st place#Scarlett Johansson#black widow#natasha romanoff#chris evans#steve rogers#captain america#tony stark#iron man#Robert Downey Jr#mcu#marvel#marraige story#romanogers#evansson#marvel cast
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you were loved the most of all.
Ushijima Wakatoshi x reader | break-up angst
summary: You should've known that when Ushijima Wakatoshi found it easy to fall in love with you, it might be even easier for him to fall out of it. But who expects the worst when it comes to loving someone as seemingly perfect as him, anyway?
Chapter 1 of 2
Chapter 2 of 2
He said it was easy to fall in love with you. He said he didn’t know when exactly, at which place, nor for what reason. Simply one day, Ushijima Wakatoshi found himself looking at you with the epiphany that maybe there’s something more meant to happen between you and him. There you stood before him that day, the person he could promise love to. (And there he stood before you that moment, the boy whose promises you found yourself believing in no matter what.)
So maybe that’s why it was even easier for him to fall out of love. When he told you he was no longer in love with you, it didn’t matter to you to ask when exactly, at which place, or for what reason. Even the universe itself is meant to fizzle out one day along with the death of the stars. Just one more person drifting away from you like a lone planet with no real orbit shouldn’t leave you broken. You are used to this. You won’t fall apart.
But you break anyway.
It was snowing outside when he decided to tell you to end things now before it hurts both of you even further. Not that the snow has anything to do with the coldness creeping up your chest threatening to spill out of you in endless sobs. You were glad, though. That at the very least, he remained honest with his feelings. He never left you guessing. Every time, he never forgets to tell you what’s on his mind. His honesty is something he thought was necessary.
“I understand, don’t worry. Thank you for telling me right away. I know you’re also considering me–” you tell him and choke up. There are tears running down your face but you’re not worried about that. Wakatoshi never let you mask your emotions around him. For the longest time, he reminded you to feel free to be completely bare with him. All the good and the bad, he said. Don’t be afraid to show them to me. I will always understand.
He steps closer and puts you between his arms. You feel his chin on top of your head as you lean your face into his chest. You’re sobbing now. “I’ll be fine, Toshi. We’ll be fine.”
He kisses the top of your head and lets you stay in his arms for minutes. “I loved you then, and I love you still. It’s just that they’re no longer the same kind. I will stay if you ask me to, okay? Anything you want.”
This only makes you cry harder. He’s always been too good. And even in breaking your heart, he’s too good. You want him to hold on. You want to ask him to stay with you for years and years. Even with a different kind of love, you’ll let him be as long he’s close by. But someone like him who has dreams beyond yourself shouldn’t ever be with someone like you who still lacks certainty toward anything.
“Just for tonight,” you ask, still crying. “Can I stay?”
“of course,” he replies. Anytime you want. Anything you want. It has always been this way.
Because humans are creatures of routines and familiarity, you spend that night the way you usually do when you’re at his place. You cook dinner with him and eat on the dining table, sharing stories and laughter. You keep adding food to his plate and he smiles as you giggle at everything you find funny.
It’s okay, it’s okay. You’ll be okay. You’ll be fine.
You clean the kitchen and stay in the living room. He leans on the couch as you lay down with your head on his lap. You keep talking and laughing. He goes along, sometimes adding things to make you laugh even more, sometimes simply agreeing, sometimes asking questions. You keep it loud and light, afraid of the silence. Inside you, it’s so heavy, your heart might just fall off. This will be the last, you tell yourself. You want to be happy for now. While he’s still here.
"Do me a favor, okay?" You tell him as you're nearing slumber. "Let me leave first tomorrow. Maybe stay in bed, maybe pretend you're asleep. But tomorrow, don't get out of the room until I've left the house." Your voice shakes, feeling yourself wanting to sob.
"I don't want to wake up to another empty bed but I don't want to see your face when I wake up too," you curl into him even further. "I'm sorry for being selfish. I'm sorry I still don't really know what to do. And I know you wake up pretty early and you know, do stuff, but just for tomorrow, please?"
Wakatoshi didn't really understand why. He originally planned on cooking breakfast for you and taking you to the train station. He would watch you board the train and he'd make sure to smile at you as he waves. You always waved back. That's how it works. Even after fights, and even after especially bad nights, you'd still do the same. Watching you leave with a smile was how you both knew you'd still be fine the days after. That nothing much can affect your relationship. For years, this has been the routine.
But tomorrow, he knows he has to give way. He knows what he said hurt you. It would be wrong of him to do what he wants simply because he's used to.
Tomorrow's the last, he realises. And then if you want, he'd never see you again.
--
You wake up pretty early. The sky is a calm shade of blue, the world outside still waking up. You check the time on your phone and find it's 6 AM. Last night, you slept with your back on him. The sight before you is the other end of his bedroom and you notice just how much of yourself you've managed to leave around his place. Pieces of just one other person in his life, scattered in places around his world pretending that’s just where they belong. You didn't mind leaving things behind back then. You never really thought of the day that you might’ve to take back all of them. Just how does one pick up parts of themselves when they thought they’ve finally found a place for them to stay?
But as you stand up, you conclude that when things end, traces shouldn’t be left behind. He didn’t decide to break up only to be reminded of you even after you’re no longer close to him. So you go and pick every little thing that's yours. Even your jacket and sweaters and a few pairs pyjamas in his closet. You'll just take his things from your place too and hand it to Tendou's shop. Coming back here won’t do you any good. Him coming to your place instead wouldn’t either.
Collecting all your things, even the ones you can't use anymore, you leave the bedroom and enter the living room. You don't have many belongings here aside from some DVDs and books. You only take the books and leave the rest for him. You've always preferred reading anyway.
Setting your bag and things aside on the sofa, you go ahead and wash yourself in the bathroom and bring your toothbrush and some other products with you when you're done. You then head to the kitchen to cook him something light to eat for breakfast . You knew you didn't have to. He knows how to cook. It has always been him cooking breakfast for you. When you could, you’d rather stay in bed until the very moment you must start preparing to go to uni or work. But you did anyway. He's probably in his bed, awake. He has never been a heavy sleeper. With all the moving you did around his room, he was bound to wake up if he wasn't already.
You make him a simple omelette and write a small message on top of it with ketchup. "Good luck with practice today!"
You've already cleaned everything you used, preferring to wash and set utensils as soon as you're done with them. That way, when you're sitting down to eat, there won't be any cluster around to distract you.
You put the ketchup down and decide that should be enough. You'll stop here. You should go now.
Ushijima is sitting on his bed. He's been awake since 5 AM when he usually goes on his run. It isn't the first time he chose to stay with you instead of going out, but he can't help but feel heavy this time. He stayed in for you. But as the minutes pass by, it seems that he simply cannot find the courage to sit up and face you.
He wants to sink into his bed.
There's knock on the door followed by sentences uttered softly. "Toshi, I'm going now. There's breakfast on the table. Make sure to eat before you go."
There goes the heavy feeling again. Maybe if this keeps up, he might just actually sink and never get back up.
You've done that a few times. Leaving while he's still in the room. You don't even open the door. You simply knock and tell him you're about to go, always reminding him to eat before he goes too.
But this will be the last, he thinks. If you leave now, will he never see you again?
a/n
chapter 2 will be up soon not rly sure when tho. (it's up now the link is at the top)
also, im not entirely sure but i think i didnt use any pronouns or gendered nouns for this except "girl" in the 1st paragraph which i erased just now? if i'm right, then i hope everyone reading this get to feel as though theyre rly the person in the story. unless ofc u dont want that bc this isnt the happiest ushitoshi x reader fic u can find🥲. but thanks for reading!!!! m so sorry for typos nd other errors as well. i kinda cant read my own writings bc sometimes doing so makes me wanna smack myself in the head and never write again nd i hate that so now im leaving my mistakes to the gods nd hope they love me enough or smth. but yes thank u sm again for reading!!!!
#ushijima x reader#ushijima scenarios#ushijima angst#ushijima fanfic#ushijima reader insert#ushijima x y/n#ushijima wakatoshi
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Haiii doll tumblr... haiiiiii
Heres a ranking of my top 7 favorite clothing pieces in my rainbow high collection pls enjoy also i wont be abke to recognize like. Any fashion or brand references. Except Sheryl's and like a couple others so sorrayy
(Also like.. idk a thing abt the technicalities of fashion. I just know what i like to put on dolls gjshfhsjdj dont take these as objective)
7. Gabriella's turtleneck
Idk what can i say, it just feels very Gabriella! It's fitting for her, and it's just a super nice color. I used to pretty firmly believe I wouldn't look good in a turtleneck (and tbh i don't really own many sweaters anyway) but i've warmed up to it the past couple years and i think im gonna get myself a nice one for the coming winter
6. Delilah's dress
I mean Delilah's probably my favorite RH character (not doll specifically but character) just based on her description (according to the fandom wiki, im like 99% sure i saw it on mga's website too at one point but now i cant find it??) being a sweet blue ridge country gal and all and like. What's more country blue ridge mountain buttercup than her dress tbh. It's just so pretty and delicate, it's one of those pieces i almost never wanna take off once its on a doll just bc its so nice. Also shoutout to her boots I will always shoutout cowboy boots
5. Tie between Daria's doc martens and jacket
Tbh i was going back and forth and which should be here bc I didn't wanna put 2 pieces from the same doll in 2 spots, but i think this spot fits them both bc i like them for largely the same reasons- they look good with a lot of my other dolls (not jist RH but a couple of my ooak monster highs) and they're pieces I'd want irl. Ive been trying to get my hands on some boots that are close enough to doc martens (even if they arent bc if they look cool idgaf abt the actual brand) and i got pretty close at a thrift store, but they were one size too small 😔 anyway good pieces. Shoutoht to Daria she was one of my first rh dolls
4. Sheryl's jacket
Hot (or possibly cold idk) take I don't think there's a single bad piece in either of Sheryl's outfits. They're all perfect. I have not yet seen clueless but its been in my "movies i need to watch over quarantine" list that i made in april 2020 since the beginning and i think this is a sign to watch it. Anyway the jacket's here bc it's the most iconic part imo, but like also shoutout to both of her heels, all of her 2nd outfit, the sheer top i've used for like four separate dolls outfits, the earrings, the belt, literally everything else etc etc
3. Krystal's Fishnets
This one's pretty simple- her fishnets are just really versatile! They're like real life fishnets. Goes with a lot! Looks good on pretty much anyone! Improves any situation! Fits my monster high ooaks! They also look great in them!
2. Natasha's fur coat
SO glamorous SO perfect literally everything i need to know about a character can fit in a fur coat. Ik theres other fur coats in rh but idc this is my fav. And also the only one in my collection but idc its the best one idc idc idc
1. Uma's hat
Uma holds a special place in my heart for the simple fact that she is a guitarist. And i am a guitarist. And we have similar hats. <3 but also like none of my other rh dolls have hats and hats for dolls are just good accessories but ESPECIALLY this hat specifically. Idk it just rly brings together the edgy punk kinda thing and she might feel incomplete without it tbh. But also i lile it bc its a lot like my favorite hat <3
(Also. Like sheryl. I don't think theres a single bad or mediocre piece in Uma's set? Maaaybe her kinda plain 1st outfit heels but they look good w the rest of the outfit tbh. Shoutout to her coat and skirt and earrings and spiked bracelet and shirts that i struggled not to put on this list also bc i didnt want 1 doll in 2 spots)
#rainbow high#dolls#speci speaks#long post#only now realizing i shouldve put this under a read more but i was not on desktop! so its ok i have an excuse!
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yesterday was such a good day
sorry this is gonna be reeeeallly long lol
I was w Bee in the morning and my brother was throwing around a ball with his friend and Bee said “Caroline, watch out!!!” Lol bc they were gonna hit me and i was like huh? but the ball went past me and she said “How do you not have fast reflexes by now? I have a son- you have a brother and you dont have fast reflexes? Come ooonnnn” Lolll
there was one point where they would’ve actually hit me but i dodged it and she said “That was better!”
and then they started throwing it over her head 💀 she ducked down after the other kid caught the ball and i thought to myself “where those fast reflexes at?”
also before all that she was talking to me about how her grade (1st) is singing at mass saturday and she joked “Do I have to go tomorrow if I’m already going to mass today? I dont wanna… is that bad? sorry🤣🤣”
she went to mass yesterday (friday) w the school bc we all go to mass as a school on friday morning
but usually the younger grades don’t go, they just livestream it bc of covid and i didn’t know they were coming yesterday
Even after she said that I still didn’t know because I was so lost in thought thinking about how beautiful she is and how she was talking to me and how much i love her laugh
so i was so surprised when I saw her and i was like omggggg she’s hereeeee AAAA
that’s when our whole convo actually registered in my head 💀
and she was glancing at me during mass 😏 Lol
I had forgotten my chromebook at home yesterday, so i asked my dad to bring it and he said he would
i went to lunch and still didn’t have it so i was like wtv he prob forgot about it its fine
I saw Bee on the way to lunch and she said hi 🥰
later I was sitting at a table eating & waiting for my friends when I saw her come back out of the corner of my eye and i was like 😮💨 act cool act cool just be normal
and i noticed she was walking towards me so i turned around and SHE HAD MY CHROMEBOOK
she handed it to me and she said
( she was talking very fast and she seemed kinda nervous it was so adorable)
hi i had your chromebook.. i probably should’ve just brought it with me when i came to do lunch duty in the first place but i forgot it sorry bye
awe 😭❤️
and then at the end of the day i ran into her as she was leaving and she was taking one of her students outside with her for his parents to pick him up and she said to him “Do you know who that is? 😁🤩 That’s Mrs. ********’s daughter! Caroline this is Carlos.” (my mom is his teacher)
~~~~~~~~~~
i went to church today again
(tooootally to see her class and not her)
i wasn’t even sure if she would be there but I still got all pretty and went
I didnt see her come in
she walked past me and i was like 😍😍😍
she was with her husband of course (Chris😜🤑☠️)
when little kids go up to sing and do little dances at masses, their teachers sit on the floor in front of them against the pews so they’re kinda hidden and they do the hand motions to the songs to help the little ones remember
my mom didn’t really know them, so she had asked me to sit and help the kids too
and when I was walking up to sit, Bee was behind me and she said “oh my god I’m sitting with Caroline- Where are you sitting?” and she touched the back of my arm 🥺 it felt so nice
she sounded like me talking excitedly to my friends whenever I see her lolll
and she sat with me and we did it and it was so adorable
the kids love her so much its the sweetest thing
and her face is so cute when she says hi to them and they give her hugs omg she looks so happy
my heart hurts every time i think about it
like rn
i get literal pains im so in love with her
im so scared for next year bc im going to a different school and most likely never will see her again
but i hate thinking about that
im not the church kinda person but im gonna go every single weekend just to see her
gosh i never knew i was capable of loving so much
bruh idek what to do with all of this emotion
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Hi, I have always read your furuba reviews and I'm very curious about which are your favorite characters and why?
HI!
Thank you for reading my posts<3. I know I've been slow lately, but I'm not in a right emotional place right now, but I'll be back to posting soon. Actually talking abt furuba & story-telling here in tumblr is such a peaceful outlet that I'm thankful for.
While I love 97% of furuba characters, my faves kept changing while I watched the anime. I decided to have 5 top characters as faves & number one kept changing as the anime progressed.
Since I'm all abt story-telling, I think I need to separate the anime from the manga cuz no way in the anime that tohru would be on my top 5, heck not even top 10! I really don't like how her character was reduced to yuki's mommy-tohru, then angel-tohru, then villain-fixer tohru. The real individual tohru with her own personal story is just two eps long, so meh~. Also, while yuki is in my top 5 in the anime, I don't like how he's too perfect & prince in the anime while his own theme is the imperfect non-prince. Kyo's, too in my top 5 but I dont like how his own story is intentionally messed up by the anime with the stupid "I forgot" that contradicts the anime's own canon plot...
So, I'll tell you my top 5 fave character in the manga so fat with no particular order.
Tohru, while I'm yet to uncover her own plot in the manga, so far she has way more character exploration & depth!! She really feels like a different character from the anime! I'm shocked! The facial expressions, the occasional doubtful self-talk, even the "fake-smile"mask she puts is so expressive. She is treated as a character with a personal plot , regardless of being the protagonist. Her own plot is not reliant on being yuki's mommy, or the sohma's shrink, or a fixer. Her own plot line is abt grief & being lonely. It's the most common struggle that we all share regardless of our gender, race, financial status. Death is the ultimate fact & we'll face loosing a loved one & feeling lonely is not related to social skills nor being loved. I'll forever hate the anime for passing on such unique universal theme in favor of emphasizing the most popular shonen-themed coming of age story ( a boy becoming a man) "yuki" or the over-exaggerated drama in "kyo's". Like I dont want them to pass any of the 3 characters plotlines, but the anime made a choice & forever cemented anime tohru as the most "fixer"character in anime history like 98765678 of other female protagonists.
Yuki has way more character & realness in the manga. He doesnt come off as narrator-y as he does in the anime simply cuz the anime only chose the parts where yuki narrates as a voice-over & told us how to feel & dropped all the parts where he's interacting & actually talking to other characters not just the audience. His own personal story is abt "observing, learning & having the guts to make a move & embracing his own imperfection". I love this! Anime yuki is not imperfect. no. he's the icon of perfect prince, he even initiates a set of fanclub girls into the world that they float! He's so perfect, he "heals" a girl simply by talking to her once. That's all it takes him to fall in love & find his soulmate. While in the manga, I'm starting to see yuki display signs of "kind jerk" in the making, that's refreshing!
I admit that I didn't include kyo into my top 5 until se02. Don't get me wrong, he's so endearing since ep1, but didnt seem to be complex nor refreshing as the others. but se02, ep 9 was the first glimpse into his own character depth & I got hooked! I'm so in love with the theme of "repeated mistakes & guilt". it's such a mature theme & speaks to a much wider audience. The more we repeat the same mistakes, the more we self-sabotage our lives. Also, I love the love isn't a magic healing element in his story. He's the most loved character by tohru, yet her love only hurt him more due to his guilt. Moreover, the romantic element itself wasnt a cliche "love at 1st sight, nor lovers since childhood, nor girl fixes a guy, nor guy protects the girl from danger". Not at all. It was "love blooming subtly, little by little by mundane daily life". I cant express how much I applaud Takaya-san for such complex writing. In the anime, kyo only comes when it's his ep, other than that, he's absent or characterless. I hated that. So far in the manga, kyo has an existence even in other plotlines & has different aspects of his character. Also, I'm shocked at how much inner dialogue he has! like no too much that it involves other character nor too little that you dont understand him. It's just the right amount.
Momiji. He's the most balanced character. He isnt fixed by tohru, but isnt perfectly fine either. He's the definition of the right amount of kindness. He doesn sell himself to make other happy like tohru or kureno, nor puts himself in danger to save others like haru. He does help others but also helps himself. He helped his mom forget him cuz honestly that wasnt even his choice. it's the dad's. He participated willingly tho in avoiding her, but he didnt dwell in self pity & locked himself emotionally. He let go of loving tohru & encouraged kyo, but while he genuinely loved kyo, he didnt just back off cuz he's kind & a sacrificial angel. He stood like a man & challenged kyo for tohru's heart, but let go when he realized the choice is tohru's. not them. They can love her aromatically, but she's the one who decides who to be with. I love the theme of "not competing for love". it's not a competition really. never was. Still, as love sick & heart-broken as he was, momiji didnt dwell in self-pity & after allowing himself to heal, he bounced back & smiled. Momiji is no foolish traveler.
The spot is reserved to a certain character that I want the manga to prove their worth. I dont want them to be as shallow as the anime made them to be. I want to see depth. I dont know if the manga writes them better, but once I finish the manga, I'll know.
I wanted to add shigure but no. Despite all the complexity & the unique roles he has & despite how much I love characters with big giant flaws & ugly characteristics, shigre fell from my top 5 long ago. Look, this seems petty but I can't get over the fact that he slept with akito's mom. ewwwww. It makes me wanna puke! so disgusting. yuck yuck yuck! I dont mind that he "cheated"or wanted to "hurt akito by sleeping with ANOTHER woman". As a matter of fact, such acts create drama, ugly feelings & emotional struggle. I love such things in fiction. but he did it with the mother. He actually laid with both mom & daughter in his life. ewwwwww! This level of eww is so revolting to me! Some ppl are disgusted by bugs & worms that they want to puke, me.. when ppl sleep with both parent/off spring, or both siblings. Yuck! & it's even more yuck that it didnt stop their "love" from being real/ happy/ perfect/ passionate! & that it worked in making akito "want him more & be a "woman" for him"... ew!
lol, so yeah~here's my super long answer to ur super short qs. but I dont be "papers"if I didnt write till my fingers hurt, now would I? XD. I enjoyed ur question so much! thanks<3.
Anon, Don't get offended ny my shigure-rant! XD. its petty, I know. if u read this, tell me who's ur fave?
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To Wake Up To A Mailbox Filled With Letters Only From You
Iwaizumi Hajime x reader, sfw, fluff, word count 2,071
It was driving him insane. The notes, envelopes, and pieces of paper started appearing at his desk on February 1st. They were tucked away in the cubby and made him incredibly nervous. Whoever was doing this to him was going to really, really make him lose it.
It was nice knowing that someone liked him. Even if he didnt know who it was, it was a good feeling. The only downside was that he had to keep this from you and Oikawa for as long as he possibly could. You two were Iwaizumi’s best friends yes of course, but this was too much.
If Oikawa found out he would stop at nothing to figure out who it was, the teasing would be brutal. If you found out? Iwaizumi didn't want you to think that he had feelings for anyone else, even if you werent dating he didn't want to put that idea into your head. Not only that but anytime romance or dating was brought up with you around he got nervous. Even watching Ryan Gosling movies with you was incredibly difficult. The conversation felt like walking on landmines when it came to yours or his love life.
The first day it was a purple foam heart the size of his palm. Covered in stickers, glitter glue, and in the center was a picture of him playing volleyball. It was from the stands, he could tell the photo had been zoomed in, but he was up in the air on the court. There was no message on the note other than some sharpie bubble letters that said “hottie”, he didn't really pay attention to it. He assumed it was Oikawa messing with him like usual. But when Oikawa made no mention of it he knew that it wasn't his friend.
That night at home he tucked the heart into his desk drawer. He lay in bed trying to imagine who would have made such a thing for him. Since it had been in those somehow taunting bubble letters he couldn't decipher it by handwriting. He did think the “hottie” thing was funny though. The list of people who could have left him the silly little message rattled in his mind.
He knew that he wanted it to be you. He wanted you to do something cheesy, cute, and cliche like that for him. For you to like him so much that it wouldn't bother you to do things like that. It would be your nature to give him gifts and say stupid things to him that made him laugh, that made his chest feel warm.
The next day he was surprised to see another note. He managed to slip it into the cover of his notebook without anyone seeing. It took everything in him not to peek at it during that first class. He knew for sure now that it wasn't Oikawa because they had walked to school together that morning.
It was during lunch that Iwaizumi took out the note to look at it. He had went out to grab drinks at the vending machine. Away from the prying eyes of his friends he opened the front of his notebook. This second card was much more traditional in style. Red construction paper, with white frilly lace on the edge, a mostly straight line of glitter glue outlining the heart.
This one had a picture of a bunny and text that read “some bunny loves you” , another picture of him had been doodled on so he had bunny ears and whiskers. This picture was not from volleyball and he couldn't remember where it had been taken. It was a little creepy but he cared more about who was sending these to him.
The following day he was looking forward to going to school. He wanted to see if he got another note. Even if he didnt know who was sending these, it did feel nice to know that someone could be interested in him. He had spent many valentines sharing the fruits of Oikawa's good looks. It was a good feeling to know that he could receive the same type of attention.
He did get a store bought card that day. It had a picture of a bumble bee and it read "bee my valentine and you won't get stung. A piece of candy had been taped inside the card. After that it was a cootie-catcher with all kinds of pick up lines buried in its folds. There were two more hand made cards that were covered in stickers, shiny tape, glitter and gel pen.
It was halfway to Valentine's day now. Iwaizumi woke up on the seventh of February wondering what type of card he would get. None of the other cards he had gotten helped him decipher who was sending these to him. It was once again at lunch that Iwaizumi snuck off to peak at what had been left to him. Today it had been a plain white envelope with a heart sticker sealing it shut.
Iwaizumi was expecting another bad pick up line but was instead met with an actual typed up letter. Whoever had written this actually, genuinely, liked Iwaizumi. He had this dumbfounded swirling feeling in his stomach. One of dread and excitement. Because he knew exactly what the letter was saying. The letter was true to the way he felt about you. And this letter wasnt from him to you. He didn't know who had written this.
He was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he had not seen Oikawa and Hanamaki run up behind him.
"What is this?"
Oikawa's voice had a mischievous ring to it and before Iwaizumi can properly respond the envelope had already been taken from him. His fingers ghosted the traces of the paper, trying to grab it back but missing it by inches. Hanamaki put his arms around his shoulders locking him into place. Iwaizumi was more desperate now as he tried hurling insults at Oikawa.
"Oh my god, oh my fucking god"
The look Oikawa had on his face was of pure joy. A smile spread over his face and he couldn't help but laugh.
"Who wrote it! Come on tell me who your new lover is"
Oikawa sung that last part. But now Hanamaki was interested in the letter and upon reading it he had the same reaction.
"I don't know who wrote it"
Hanamaki scoffed.
"What are you kidding?"
Iwaizumi looked at his friend confused. But Oikawa launched into a rapid fire question session with Iwaizumi.
"Wait you're telling me you have been getting these for a whole week now and you didn't say anything to me! Your dearest friend!"
Oikawa feigned injury at this, falling back into Iwaizumi as they walked.
"I didn't want to deal with it, plus I don't know who is writing these and maybe they don't want anyone else to know"
☽༓・*˚⁺‧͙·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .‧͙⁺˚*・༓☾
You had been doing your best to not tip off Iwaizumi that it was you leaving him the notes. But you were rather disappointed at his lack of reaction. You didn't expect him to suddenly be walking around like a love sick fool but he appeared no different to you. You still walked home with him and Oikawa, you had eaten lunch a few times since, everything was the same.
It was after school and you were waiting outside the gym for Iwaizumi and Oikawa. On days they had practice you hung around in the library finishing up homework or browsed through the books. The door to the gymnausm swung open, you greeted Hanamaki but were halted by the extra devilish grin he had. You roll your eyes, pretending to be annoyed by his antics.
"What did you do now?"
You ask teasingly.
"Me? I haven't done anything"
He was faking innocence.
"Really?"
You say, raising an eyebrow.
"It's funny though, because, I think thats its you whos been up to no good"
You're taken aback not sure what he's getting at. He drops the sarcasm for a second letting out an exasperated sigh.
"I know about Iwaizumi"
You pull on his arm leading him further away from the gym.
"Did he tell you it was me? Does he know? He hasn't said anything-"
He cuts you off.
"Slow down, that idiot is way too dense to know you like him back"
Hanamaki covers his mouth at that, knowing it wasn't something he was supposed to reveal to you. But you lit up at his words.
"He likes me back? But you said he doesnt know whos writing the notes"
"That's because he liked you before you wrote him that letter...wait did you say notes? There's more than one?"
You felt your face heat up in embarrassment. So you explained what you had been doing. The notes for each day. The entire time you spoke Hanamaki had an expression that was somewhere between disbelief and bemusement. You were about to ask Hanamaki about Iwaizumi some more when said boy walked out from the gym.
You let go of Hanamakis wrist, not realizing you had been holding onto him for so long, to wave at your other two friends. They started to approach you but you waved them off.
“Go on ahead I’ll catch up!”
You turn to Hanamaki once again. More serious than before.
“How did you know it was me?”
“You help me out with essays all the time, that letter you wrote him sounds exactly like you”
☽༓・*˚⁺‧͙·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .‧͙⁺˚*・༓☾
The next day Iwaizumi was not able to focus. He had received a bouquet of suckers and lollipops. Each adorned with sharpie and a terribly corny phrase like “99% Angel” or “Lover Boy”. Oikawa had of course taken one of these for himself. Saying that Iwaizumi owed him. They were walking home without you today, you said you had needed to help Hanamaki with some homework. But that was exactly what had been bothering Iwaizumi .
The night before when you and his friend had been out in the dusk alone. Your hand on his wrist. You looked flustered, and Iwaizumi could only recall a few other times you had been blushing so intensely. What had you been talking about with him? It was driving him crazy that he didn't know, that you were off with him now.
“Where are the rest of them?”
Oikawa asked, grabbing at Iwaizumi's bag. Iwaizumi pulled out another sucker from his coat pocket but Oikakwa was not satisfied.
“No, the rest of the valentines cards and letters, I wanna see them, you can't hide those from me forever”
Wide eyed Iwaizumi doesn't know what to do or say.
“Those are private property”
But Oikawa knows his friend well, and it was not long before his request was granted. Reluctant and embarrassed Iwaizumi allows Oikawa to shuffle through his desk drawer where he has stashed his paper treasure. Oikawa of course photographs everything. When he reaches for the one valentine with the bunny pun he stops.
“Isn't this photo from that movie night we had a couple months ago?”
“What? No way it was only me, you and…”
His words stayed caught as whispers in his mouth. Oikawa was right. It was hard to tell because the white wall behind Iwaizumi in the photo could have been so many places, but he did remember wearing that shirt. You took that photo. It was you.
“Hey, you know you have to make them a card now right?”
☽༓・*˚⁺‧͙·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .‧͙⁺˚*・༓☾
You and Hanamaki had been trying to sort out some sort of a plan. You were originally going to confess to Iwaizumi face to face on Valentine's day. But you wanted to do it immediately now. You didn't want to drag anything out or confuse Iwaizumi by not telling him that it was you. There was only one more day until Valentine's day and you couldn't decide if it was worth the wait anymore.
The morning was brisk and a bit cold. You were shedding off your coat, opening your locker you saw an unfamiliar shade of pink. It was a paper heart. Similar to the ones you had made for Iwaizumi. Iwaizumi. You recognized his handwriting. It read;
I feel the same. Meet me after school tomorrow to talk. Can I call it a date if we get food? Check yes or no.
☽༓・*˚⁺‧͙·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .‧͙⁺˚*・༓☾
A/N: Did I plan this out at all? No. Did I edit this at all? Also no. But this idea was rattling around in my brain and I needed to get it out. Its a little Jem and The Holograms with the whole “omg surprise its me the person you're in love with and also the person who flirts with you a lot and makes you confused” ALSO I LITERALLY HAD NO IDEA HOW TO END THIS ONE????? so sorry if its more muddled than usual
#Iwaizumi Hajime#iwaizumi x reader#haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu x gender neutral reader#hq iwaizumi#Iwaizumi fluff#valentines day
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so after my tags on this post where win was wearing glasses and playing the piano
(plus an anon request) here's some more Food For Thought i.e what i think would go down:
they get paired together. they have like ... 2 weeks to prepare for this assignment. so sarawat decides to tell tine to come over to his place the 1st weekend, to decide on the song and stuff. but also bc he wants to see tine squirm in his dingy small room for one, thats all messy and where everything is all over the place. he wants to get some pleasure from seeing tine look uneasy in such a mess bc tine's so rich and posh and immaculate and so damn well presented all the time. so tine comes over, but he decided on not wearing his specs that day, just his contacts, which .... annoys sarawat bc he wont admit it out loud but tine in his glasses is his Undoing. he dreams about tine in his glasses, dreams about wrecking him up with them on. so now that he isn't wearing them, sarawat's frustrated, sexually. so what does he do? trash the place even more. he's tryna find some paper to write potential songs down on and he empties his entire drawer onto the floor. he's tryna find a pen on the mess that is his table but he can't find one, until he turns around when he hears tine call his name. and tine's standing close to him with his pen in his hand, giving it to sarawat to use. he takes it, and looks at tine's name engraved on it and scoffs, thinking "rich people,". but he takes it anyway. and seats himself onto his bed - mattress on the floor, and tells tine to come and sit next to him so they can get this over with. tine looks around at first. he isnt uncomfortable with idea of sitting on a mattress on the floor, but that ... its sarawat's bed .... that feels a little too private. and he blushes at that. sarawat's gaze is literally on him all this time, to see how tine reacts. he thinks tine will complain about it, that "do you not have a chair?", but when tine comes and sits next to him, its sarawat that's surprised. not even one complaint? not even one?? anyway. within 2 hours, they decide on a song. surprisingly, they don't argue much over it? they both listen to each other's preferences, what may or may not work, that they have to use both a piano and a guitar, and they figure it out. by then, their knees are touching, and they'll hover over one another to see what suggestions the other is scribbling down on the notepad. its impressive. until tine stands up and tells sarawat that, if they've finished, then he should leave. he doesnt wanna take up anymore of his time, and that he should get going home bound bc he has dinner with his family at their house - sarawat coughs out "mansion" - later on today. tine tells sarawat they can record at his place next weekend, and in the blink of an eye, he's got his shoes on and is out of the door, saying bye. but thats when sarawat looks down and in his hand .... he's holding onto tine's pen. he scoffs again at the absurdity of tine's engraved name on it, but finds himself delicately going over the engraving thats carved into it. and if he sleeps with it under his pillow that night, well, nobody else needs to know. the next weekend, sarawat comes over to tine's "place". tine's stood outside ready to greet him and let him in, so sarawat knows he's at the right "house". god, it makes him sick just thinking about the grandiose and the excessiveness of it. he feels so small, as he adjusts the strap of his guitar case on his shoulder. this place isnt meant for people like him. he feels even more like a fish out of water when he steps into tine's "bedroom". it knocks him sick. and then he notices the piano, and ... of course tine would have a piano in his room. "don't worry, the walls are soundproof," tine mentions. "of course they are," sarawat says. they set up in silence after that. honestly, last weekend, sarawat had wanted tine to stay a little longer, but he couldn't make up an excuse to keep him around. today, sarawat just wants to get this done and go. his skin crawls as he investigates his surroundings - tine's bedroom. it pisses him off even more, how despite all this luxury, tine didnt complain once last weekend to sit on, essentially, a mattress on the floor for 2 hours to work. how, despite all this to boast about, tine never once showed an inflated ego. instead, he was the shy, quiet boy. its that ... that had gained sarawat's attention. just when they're about to record, sarawat stops them. "wear your glasses." tine turns around on his stool and gives him a confused look. "wear them, otherwise i'm not recording." seconds, feeling like minutes, of silence pass by between them, as they look at each other, neither willing to back down. sarawat didn't know what it was, was it tine not wearing them last week and the frustration of that, or was it his discomfort coming across as becoming more assertive and demanding so that he could feel some power in a place like this, or both, but he was gonna have tine wear his glasses. so he got up, and looked around the room, thinking of the most obvious place tine would put his glasses, and rummaged. bedside table? no. bedside drawer? no. until his eyes fell on the pair placed carefully on tine's study table. taking them, he positions himself in front of tine, grabbing his stool and sitting directly opposite him. tine's been watching sarawat all this time. how he looked, oddly, so much at home, wondering around his room like that. demanding him to wear his glasses like that. no one's ever really done that to tine before. sarawat places the frame on tine, achingly slowly. he's so close to tine's face, that the warmth of his breath sends a shiver, as the cold metal of the frame tingles his skin. it feels too much all of a sudden, like there's no space, despite the vastness of tine's bedroom. "you look so hot with them on," sarawat whispers. no one's ever really said that tine to before, either. none of them back away. they know they've got a recording to do. they know that. but tine's finding himself constantly flickering his gaze from sarawat's eyes, down to his mouth. those lips. and then up again. what is this ... this overcoming? sarawat doesn't leave much time to ponder. somehow, he inches even more closer than before, still staring into tine's eyes, for any indication that tine doesn't want this too. but none comes. even when their noses are brushing against one another, none comes. "can i-" and its tine that doesn't let sarawat finish his sentence. he's kissing him. he's got his hands bunching up the fabric of sarawat's shirt, forming creases as he clutches. its not much, just small one peck, that becomes two, then five. until tine backs away, and his ears are coloured as red roses in full bloom. "didn't know you had it in you," sarawat's smirking now, paired with an eyebrow raised. this is where he wanted tine, blushing, stuttering, hoping he'd want more. "shut up," tine tries to glare. tries. but with his cheeks now tinted pink, he looks nothing more than adorable. "make me ..." sarawat says, pulling tine just that bit more closer to him again, missing the warmth of him already on him, on his lips. "that's cheesy. try again." "your walls are soundproof right? how about we test them?" "that was even worse." and tine's laughing. laughing with his hand shoving at sarawat's shoulder, because not once did tine ever imagine that sarawat would ever actually use, ya know, pick up lines. "what do you want me to say then?" sarawat asks, holding tine's hand on his shoulder within his, lacing their fingers together. "just kiss me already." tine suggests. and so, he did. screw the recording. later, when their lips are swollen and bitten and their hair has had their fingers roamed through, when their skin's still blushing a light shade of red, they'll regret making out on tine's bed, creasing his pristine pure cotton sheets. but for now, that's not a concern.
#2gether#2gether the series#tine x sarawat#2gether: fics#faiza talks#OKAY I MADE IT INTO A POST INSTEAD.#But yes HFBDUFID BYE.
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Medieval/ending AU: Knight!Mirio as childhood friends with F!Sorcceer s/o?
Top tier encouraging buddies!
Yes. I'm 100% here for this.
Similar to how you and Mirio are 100% there for eachother eyyyyyy
I should not be writing these while sleepy oof
You two met one day in the forest surrounding your small village; mirio was looking for animals to save and assist, and you were working on your water transmutation spells by the creek!
You'd been having trouble getting the spell just right, only able to levitate the water instead of transmuting it into another material.
You were getting more and more frustrated by the moment when a cheerful voice interrupted the soft forest ambience.
"Wowie!! I've never seen anyone levitate water up close before"
"ACK"
As you tense up, the water transmutes into iron momentarily before splashing into the creek, water once again.
"Gosh, I'm sorry miss! I didnt mean to break your concentration!"
You turn and there's Mirio, scraps of metal tied on him like some makeshift armor, smiling like a beam of sunlight.
"Uh.....that's alright, I had it for a second there! I'll get it again if I keep trying."
"Ooooh are you a magicky user?"
"Heheh, I think sorceress-in-training would suit me better. What about you? Are you training to be a knight?"
"Mhm! I wanna grow up and help keep people safe!! Oh oh! And maybe save a princess or prince! Or uh....somebody in a tower that needs help, because-
He looks around and whispers, as if he's giving you a very coveted piece of information
"I'm a preeeeetty good climber!"
And so begins your very sweet friendship!
Everyone in the village thinks you two are adorable, always walking around trying to help people, Mirio helping you find things for spells, both of you proudly telling the other adults about how amazing and talented the other is.
"Y/n is the coolest magicky user I know!"
"Uh- Mirio.."
"Hm? Oh sorry y/n!"
*ahem*
"Y/n is the coolest sorceress-in-training that I know!"
"And Mirio is the bravest knight I know!!"
Nobody and nothing could get between you and Mirio's friendship, well except one thing-
Your ding dang feelings for eachother.
Fast forward and You are the apprentice to your kingdoms wizard, and Mirio is second in command to the head knight of the kingdom's royal guard.
It was around this time you both started realizing your love for the other might have grown into something a bit more than platonic.
You both enjoyed eachothers company, felt the others absence when apart, and there was this weird.....want.....to kiss???smooch?? HHUUUUUUHHHH!?
But of course, in true anime fashion, neither of you want to confess at first, opting to go the "haha no we're just best buds! Amigos! Pals! Totally not in love!" Route.
Mirio especially is worried about ruining your friendship, he adores you! He loves your honesty, the immense knowledge you have about magical history and terminology, and well.....everything about you!
He didnt wanna lose you, but on the other hand.
This felt like torture.
Lovey dovey, sugary, syrupy, and tremendous torture.
Decides if he's going down? He's gonna go down in the most romantic ad over-the-top way possible.
You wake up to flowers at your doorstep.
A lot of flowers.
No seriously it's a bit concerning how many flowers there are, who in their right mind would send this many???
Shortly after thinking this a cluster of the children in your village gather and each take a bunch of flowers in their arms
What in the world??
It takes a second, but the children start gently taking the petals and making a path, and as you slowly follow them, you start to recognize the area?? It looks the same as the rest of the forest, trees, bushes, more trees....why does this feel so-
"Keep moving forward miss! He's waiting for you!"
One of the children whispers, as they scamper away with the rest of their group.
"He? Wait do you mean Miriaaaaaand they're gone, right then"
You wander through the forest, still confused about what's happening, and hope you're going the right way.
And you are, which you realize when you notice another path of petals, and begin to follow.
It's driving you crazy, why is this place familiar? Why do you feel so calm here? Why.......oh......ohgoodness....
"Hello y/n, glad you the kiddos didn't accidentally set you in the wrong direction!"
"Mirio what's going on?"
He smiles as he walks over, softly taking your hand in his, speaking in a tone much quieter than his usual loud, energetic voice.
"Do you remember y/n? This place?"
".....yes......I believe I do....."
This......this was where you two met for the first time, though it looked a bit different, the trees were taller and the creek had grown a bit wider, kinda cool how this spot had in a way grown with you and Mirio over the years.
"So....y/n"
"...............yeaaah Mirio?"
"I did all this and brought you here to ask you something super important"
Still caressing your hands he steps closer.
"Y/n l/n, you've been my closest friend, confidant, comforter, and general.....uh.... best...person- gosh I should've written this down uhm-"
Wait.....are his hands shaking??......
Why...does he look flustered? Mirio never looks flustered why is he nervous why....
Oh...OH......OH GOODNESS.....
"MIRIO"
"Y-yes y/n?"
"I LIKE YOU, I WANNA BE YOUR GIRLFRIEND, AND LIKE, I DONT KNOW, CUDDLE AND STUFF"
You did it! Heck yes
now, his reaction is delayed, but after a few moments of scilence he's pulling you close and laughing
"Darn it y/n, that was adorable but you really stole my thunder there!"
"Heh, sorry! Once I realized what you were trying to do it kinda just...happened"
"It's alright love I don't mind"
Hes smiling and hugging you
".........did you just call me "love" "
"Yup! I cant tell ya how long I've been wanting to do that, I am so siked to just-
He lovingly pulls a strand of hair away from your face.
"To just shower and spoil you with so much love, babe you're gonna get cavities from all the sugar I'll be giving!"
💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙
Did it take me this long to get to some actual general headcanons? Yes.
Was it worth it? I'd like to think so!
Now, it goes without saying Mirio is immensly supportive of your sorcery.
He really loves watching you work on plant spells especially.
Really enjoys watching you manipulate how ivy grows up a wall, or making sure all the morning glories open each day at dawn, he just finds it interesting!
Talks about you all the time at work
His knight friends find it both sweet and kinda frustrating, because as much as they admire Mirio, he will literally talk about how the light hits your hair for half an hour, and patient as they are everyone has a limit 😂
Pffft a lot of interactions like this:
"Oh oh! Babe do the thing!"
*you make a flower grow from your hand and put it in Mirio's hair*
Mirio: "so cooool!" :D
Even though you're both older, Mirio never seems to lose that sense of awe and wonder when he watches you do the magics
Takes you on picnic dates whenever he can, loves spending the after noon cuddling on a blanket in the sunshine! Also it's ion these picnic dates that he's the little spoon!!
He actually asks and it doesnt matter if it's the 1st or 59th time, he looks so shy just quietly going "y/n.....could you hold me please?"
His job has him dealing with tough people, and even tougher situations most of the time, so being able to just spend time with you? Reminds him of why he wanted to be a knight in the first place: to save and protect the good in this world.
#mirio x reader#togata mirio x reader#mirio bnha#bnha headcanons#bnha x reader#bnha x y/n#bnha x you#mirio hcs
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lifes been weird and sad , got so much stuff i wanna say dont even know if thats the right subred to but here goes.i m 18 , from Greece , first year in Uni and life is not the way i want it to bei live on my own , rent is being paid by mom and her husband , month pocket money given by dad and by my part time jobat some point in high school i understood that our school years were our most carefree years , tho only now do i really understand itman this post is gonna cramp my fingers shouldve used the pcused to hang out a lot till 2nd year of high school then in 3rd year cause of me studying more i was hanging out less , used to have around 4groups of ppl to hang around then only one , cliche but i wasnt anyone special in school , gotta mention i went to a music middle-high school , only highlights i remember are in 2th-3rd grade trading blows with a girl (think she was 5th grade) ,3rd grade kissing a girl in her cheek then running away from the boy-horde coming after me , 4th grade trading blows with a 6th grader ,6th grade punching a guy for calling names my little sis (we good now see him out we talk he a nice dud) , 9th grade a girl i had a chance with but fucked it up big time , 9th grade breaking a cello almost getting expelled ,12th grade playing bass at a concert in Thessaloniki with a music group of my schooldidnt really have many close friends but there were some from school and other places you can call closer friends , but now even with them i ve started to fade away which i cannot bear but i m the type of giving up and not trying until i m lategot laboratory this morning and this is gonna take a while hope i can get some sleepfeels weird using reddit to express my thoughts i even find it a bit cringy talking to myself but oh welli wanted to visit a physiatrist because i ve been so mentally tired that i think i might have crippling sadness xD but i tried to arrange that back in July-August pre my 18th bday so she said a parent was required to be present so i just kept all the stuff to myselfi was learning classic guitar from 1st grade to 8th still play to this day , in music school i kinda learned h2p electric but didnt practice enough to be able to play good , also know some pianobeen listening to post rock and mostly fate music these past 10 monthssucker for good anime tho i ve been out of it lately havent even finished my summer ones , oregairu has a nice ending from what i got spoiled fromanyway thing is i am sad most of the time , i try not to show it cause i like the stereotype of being the strong guy that everyone can depend on and almost never see being emotional and also like the cool tempered guy type , tho lately i ve been craving a lot of attention that i drop the act of the calm n cool sometimesthings with my parents didnt go to well these past years , only now i can say that we ve finally kinda calmed down , mom and dad started falling out of it around 8th grade cause lots of fighting , big sis kindof took the role of mother while on her teen years , feels like she had it much worse than me10th grade sis leaves home to go elsewhere to start studies for uni , i m left with ma and lil sis back homethen i understand that i have to be there for my little sis which also got in my school that year (3kids-3years difference each) so i tried to assume the role of the big brother but she was closer to her older sister than me , i was closer to my older sister as well , feels like i was doing my lil sis wrong but i cpould relate more to big sis and could chat with her more about stufflil sis didnt open up to me a lot even to this day , she has been a lot more comfortable with me through the years i think cause she told me something important recently , kinda feelsbadman tho cause i wanted to be closer to her and i kinda tried but i think not hard enough cause she didnt seem to get any closer , cried once about it in front of my mother which was the absoluteliest worst cause i didnt want her to see me being fragile jesustho even now that i m not home i talk to her play some among us tried making her start xenoverse 2 that didnt go farhave some friends from school , we would only go all together at internet cafes , but mostly 4 of em would go out togetherin my school i had some friends from scouts tooi have an insta , used to post "cool" pics kinda stopped cause i like looking cool in front of others but i havent been in the mood to try in around a year nowused to be in some conservatory guitar groups with some other kids there , with one girl from there i used to be quite in touch until recently that i stopped seeing her for some reasons maybe i ll explain l8rwe had fun and i really mean it , we used to go on trips to play songs on different cities and stages , our group became kinda known the 2-3 good active years we were active , it still is but these years were the originals , now there are other peoplefucking christ its 2:27started playing in that group with the originals in 2017 till 2019 , we were kids from different ages going from 6th to 10th graders but i didnt understand the different in our ages until recently that i found one of the guys from the group in my cityanother closer friend is a guy from my school , met him in grade 7 still talk to him , used to sit together most of the years pretty neat guy , peculiar character but really interesting kind smart and hard workingman why couldnt my teen years be like shirou from fsn that would be awesomehad entrance exams 4-5 months ago , didnt really go as planned , shooted for Corfu didnt get in cause rather than 15 i got 10 in my last exam so i m still in my city , tho i live alone and go to my local uni insteadJuly 2019 i moved out of my old house moved in with ma and her husband with my sis , stayed there till september then till june-july 2020 i was living with my fathertbh i decided to write this post after watching a vid of Korone talking about Okayu thinking that i ve never been in an actual relationship and that i eould want to experience that but dont know where to start from , losing weight ? becoming outgoing again ? learn how to talk to girls ?i started watching anime back in 2015 on my 3ds i remember watching dubbed Inazuma Elevensince like 2 weeks ago i reached 201 anime completedok i ll stop here for tonight cause i got online uni classes tmrw i keep stimestamps for whenever i finally post this -Tuesday 3/11/2020 02:41used to be around 85-90kg in 12th grade , put on around 20-28 kilos since March 2020 , managed to lose 8-10 kilos in the summer but i m still around 30kilos up from the normal amount based on my height , got a subscription to a gym jan2019 but only managed to get into it for a short period on spring 2019 then autumn 2019 then lost motivation and let go , since March2020 i ve been doing some weights at home , tho when i look at myself in the mirror it doesnt really change how bad i feel about my body , i think my old motivation used to be a girl i used to have a crush on but not surethings with my parents werent all that great and i was mentally better when i would talk with them , they are openminded af and supportive too but puberty makes you see stuff differently like everyone is against you like the world is against you (last one might be true dunno yet) , living on my own now seems to be a bit better but as our Greek ancestors used to say theres no good without bad and the bad in this scenario is that its lonely as fuck , having lived for 18 years with my family it really hits a weird spot , everything feels lonelier now with the virus spreading around not being able to see others as much as we used to , uni doesnt feel nice , many people dont pay attention and its like the second half of 12th grade all over againgot my monthly money 4days ago , went from 200 to 9.28 quickly , when i have money i spend when i dont i m stingy , mostly like to build computers , watch lots of Linus , Paul , Kyle , Jay etc. most of my money goes to buying stuff about computers food , used to give lots of money to internet cafes when i used to hang out with the guys from school , not anymorewith the start of uni we all met new friends even i but i still feel like i am drifting apart day by day , stopped talking to my old girl friend cause i was kinda done with her attitude , called me some names i didnt appreciate because i put up with her attitude , most of the time in her own world , only would really pay attention and try to change herself when it was something she cared about , one of them wasnt her character , but to give the goods of her she was a good friend dont know if i can say she still is a friend or just someone i know , she helped me even with the girl i had a crush on , was really fun on trips with the guitar group , all in all a fun person , thing is i stopped texting her and telling her to go out cause it was 80% me trying and the other 20% her and i think that proved right when i stopped talking to her cause i thought she will see that i m not talking to her she ll think somethings wrong she ll message me to go out and have fun , send me a happy bday message posted some pics of me , didnt send me anything else after , stopped talking to her around the start of October , if i hadnt asked her something about her uni and if it wasnt my bday i dont think we wouldve talked in all of october . last saturday i was working in the area she lives in my city decided to call her sometimes didnt answer tried to suprise her and see how she is by going to her house , noone answered maybe they were on a trip idk , but it feels weird man , in the first half of the year me and a common friend of her and me went out one night , ended up being the bad guy to make her understand that she did something wrong that night , after she left i was left with our common friend talked about stuff and mostly her and i expressed myself , i knew that coming summer me and her would end up at different places so i wanted to tell her all the wrongs with her so that she could finally understand what i ve been putting up against and make her understand that she HAS to pay attention to people around her and that she will meet new people and that she ll have to be careful about her character , used to have a bit of crush on her back in 7th grade , can kinda understand why that went . On the other hand i didnt want to part ways with her with our last words being me ranting , one thing brought the other and she wont be going to her uni's city until early 2021 so i managed to go out with her some more in the summer and september . kinda feels bad to see that almost noone remembered my bday cause i remember in cram school when someone had their bday they would get a fucking cake , dont mistake me i got one , from my ma my two sisters and my moms husband , thing is i wanted to have something happen with friends , nothing happend , around 4 people remembered my bday and the others just send me some happy bday messages after seeing posts from the girl i m talking about .also heres a good song to listen to while reading stuff on reddit Sorrow from FSN by MN64 cant post links from what i understandgonna stop here for now might edit later -Tuesday 3/11/2020 15:15thing is reddit is not the right place to get help and i need a friend but it seems i cant get any from my friends , even my other friend the guy i used to sit with in all middle-high school he has drifted apart , talking more with other of his friends doing other stuff etc , that one time i needed to talk to him he said i ll call you in a while , waitied 1 and a half hour then asked him why he didnt call he said he forgot (i think) , feelsbadmananyway i dont think i m gonna keep editing this i ranted enough , gonna leave the post up for a day or so in case anyone wants to add anything then taking it down -Tuesday 3/11/2020 23:58
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Small Dec Wins
i cant believe its December already tf?!?!?!
1 - poli KIA today. saw a mother who cant feel the movement of their baby. the senior midwife tried to find the baby’s heart beat but not finding it. she said she hopes she were wrong. fell asleep at 3pm-ish, woke up super hungry. ate. i swear i feel like my weight when i measured it this morning was ~52, but after eating its close to 54 lol. eating banana and chocolate nextar is yummm. dalbang today is hella funny as always and suuper endearing. fell asleep after dalbang, didnt study hufttt
2 - today im at igd but joined azkia at vk for a bit to see partus. its not that im scared (maybe not consciously) but when the mom was being stitched i felt lightheaded, nausea, cold extremities, and i even had to squat multiple times because i couldnt stand. But i felt better after the partus so maybe seeing it was the cause. I did not feel scared at all honestly ._. and i’ve seen multiple partus before. i dont know why. i can literally feel my symphatetic tone giving out lmaoo. tried matcha latte with Cy matcha powder. it tasted more milky and grassy. mom thought it tasted like nori. i prever cocodeli alll the way (although Cy is cheaper). i think it also has a bit of caffeine that made me feel awake like a normal person should be.
3 - today is vk but there’s no patient so thank god i saw sumn yesterday. did some cicil ukmppd in the morning accompanied by matcha latte. tried to order dufan tickets and i couldnt find my damn ktp...... fell asleep after worrying about said ktp
4 - matcha latte in the car, swab at lmk, went to dufan by tj with willy, had quite some funn with atikah nila willy amel pupuy. first time trying kereta misteri, quite fun. it rained after ashar so we didnt ride anything after that. turns out my ktp was at barel’s fotocopy lmaoo thankyou ara for picking it. went to solaria ancol afterwards, picked up by mom. i didnt tell her in the morning that i was going to dufan lmao. plenary @ zoom 19 pm. rapat nemo. fell asleep.
5 - went to lmk by tj to surprise clara. went back home and fell asleep. didnt rly do anything afterwards because this ragged body gets tired easily and i dont eat much recently. i can feel the difference before and after eating and there’s actual energy after eating. its not that im hungry though, but i feel less energized. felt annoyed terrible and just wanna lay in bed (this is unrelated with the less food in my system). even though i met up with friends
6 - after LOTS of sleeping i feel somehow better but not to a ‘normal’ amount. watched kimbab family videos. did power vinyasa by doogether with fianti. took a shower and ate indomie and i felt quite normal, except i slept again wtf. i thought i would have the second half of the day but nah. did self tryouts with fianti, 150 FDI questions. I got 96/150 right. huft. such a great reality check
7 - poli lansia with dokter isip, matcha latte in the afternoon rly helps me not sleeping the day away, packed up for depok
8 - poli umum with dr gita (helped doing phys exam), packed the rest of my stuff, ate some risol and matcha lattteee in the car, took swab results, picked up hazmats etc, zoom discussion with FT PKM Kalideres (dr gita) on the way, and i finally arrived at tamel. dinner is granola with vsoy. Taste like a slightly wet granola bar, nutty fiber-y vibe
9 - walked in ui with ara, managed to jog from the trees near st ui until kuburan bikun wow. i reached that point where my leg and heart were going in a steady unburdened pace and my willpower to keep going on was tested. tried the signature steak in Double U Steak by Chef Widi, while ara tried ribeye. the ribeye was more tender than the signature. but the seasoning in the signature is quite delish, salty and oily without being too much (like futago ya). read poppyland fast pass from ara’s phone omg season 1 is finally complete! went to coftof (omgggg i miss this place), it looks different now. ordered matcha latte and it tasted weirdly like a soy milk although ara doesnt feel that way. the matcha tasted weird. wont repurchase. read chainsaw man, its so entertaining, funny and deep at the same time. denji mess around and be too naive sometimes but hes lowkey hot lmaooo. aki is lovvvvve.
10 - first day at rsud budhi asih. had moesli combined with granola + vsoy for brekkie. went back to tamel at 3 pm. it rained when i got back. bought warteg lugina worth 32k. walked to sbux for tumbler day its been a while since i had their matcha latte. it tasted quite good, but not as good as i remembered (?) maybe bcs i asked for non fat milk. sbux closes at 8 pm for now hikss
11 - left tamel at about 7:10 and arrived on budhi asih at 08:54 yalll the traffic. Icu. Bought eatlah double and ate the salted egg part. Nap. ICU discussion with dr Dedi @8pm. I presented from my phone to save data hehe,,
12 - woke up at 8, eatlah brown butter for brekkie, symcard, saladstop's caesar salad for lunch (quite 'eneg' because i didnt eat the cheese evenly so the chicken and cheese were eaten last after the vegs are out. The vegetable's not that variative, and the non vegs make the salad taste delicious (albeit maybe not THAT healthy). Evening jog @UI and i realized i can get wifi sitting near the lake n library. Stared at the night sky from my room, i swear the sky seems super clear. Saw tiny fireworks in the distance
13 - ate muesli and saladstop’s banana walnut cake, symcard, bought moon chicken and saladpoint. lunch was egg salad and the wings. the original tasted so good like??? maybe i havent had msg for a while. also tried big bang, not too spicy which is nice. cicil ukmppd. put my laundry at buih barel lmaoo. try out with fianti. got 70/100
14 - breakfast was salad and leftover chicken. today was bangsal with angga armand. the geriatric patient has a loud murmur yall (and scoliosis, so much that the heart looks distorted). went to margo city to see sales, but when i think about it id rather just thrift stuff lmao. bought lugina. slept through kuliah guru besar. writing this in yellow truck coffee, that had 2 customers on the 1st floor including me. tried banana milk. yall after trying to drink less sugar the beverage tasted super sweet. my headache just goes away. sugar is magic but unhealthy whyyyyy.
15 - igd siang with indah. This body sure is frail. Did cbd with dr afifah AND rescheduled pleno. Rip mobile data i have to use for hotspot.
16 - ok today. Inserted goedel and did bagging. I bagged the patient the wrong way at first (too much). Thankfully the nurses were kind and taught us a lot :) watched some bts content. I feel like after reading househusband my tiktok page is now immensely funnier. Dalbang is also hilarious as always. Put on ginseng sheet mask (smells quite strong)
17 - bangsal. snacked on fried chicken. matcha latte starbucks (turns out its quite full here) and liqo about keeping our tongues in check
18 - arrived at icu. And then opened line. Turns out hadin's swab is positive, so agung kak iman and me have to isolate and swab. So i went back. Ordered kanayam chicken and fish and tempe. Nasi liwet tasted goood damn. Sleptt in the afternoon. Pleno at 4 pm (entered the room 4:30). Had no motivation to do anything. Azkia is getting married! Spent 20 mins formulating words to congratulate her lmaoo
19 - osce simulation, kak nanu was so kind and encouraging. Did try out solid. Lunch is fish bite pasta with melted cheese (cause i had to reach the minimum amount for promo). It got cold so its not that good (pairing it with self made mentai sauce, mixing the mayo and chili, is way much better). Jogged in ui (and searched for wifi). Approached by someone selling haraus coffee (25k), saying that some earnings will be for charity. Its basically sweet. Can barely taste the coffee.
20 - had kanayam for lunch (brekkie is almost always muesli lately). The nasi liwet tasted much better the first time. Walked to yellow truck coffee in the pouring rain. Got banana milk. Saw webinar ksk (electrolyte correction and dr nadhira talkshow). What i got from it is that, dr nadhira is a different person from the first place. Shes visionary, knows what she want and not afraid to reach it. The mindset is different. Even if i try as hard as her, her propensity to growth is different. Cicil ukmppd. Try out with fianti (got 72/100). Talked for an hour about love and marriage and engagements (there are so much of it lately)
21 - leftover kanayam for brekkie, also ate roti salman in cikini st. swab today (met kris, nessa and others). muesli for lunch. i thought my body felt a bit warm, so i decided to find sumn to eat. tried kedai abu bakar’s spaghetti brulee. its okay. maybe because its not too cheesy or meaty, mainly bechamel sauce. the one pupuy made is much tastier. finished the whole 10x20 portion in 2 eating sesh. cicil ukmppd @ bed in the evening (somehow felt refreshed enough to be able to concentrate in bed)
22 - went early to icu to put dops form. lugina for early lunch. i feel like my metabolism is faster? or my body is not so much in calorie deficit mode anymore and it got greedier lmao i used to just ignore hunger but not now, for health. starbiiies tumbler day. ordered black tea latte with non fat milk and vanilla syrup (because raspberry syrup is no more). did cbd geri ppt.
23 - finally knew the swab result bcs kak iman asked kak farras. thankfully negative. igd with jordi. quite a few chances to do iv line, but i failed 2 times. managed to do iv injection to insert 2 drugs. saw the worst cpr ive ever seen in my life. its too slow, with maximal interruption. fish bite for lunch. wasted the rest of my day
24 - originally intended to run but i cant bring myself out of bed. packed up my stuff. picked up by mom. got the paper result of swab, got ksk from kelvyn @ capitol. can finally drink self-made matcha latte again, but it tasted horrible. i know cy matcha doesnt have that much going on, but even this is low even for them. previously i was starting to get used to the grassy smell.
25 - my lil bro remarked “maybe shes depressed because she doesnt have her chair”. fuck yall. this “depression” that im in is caused by this very place and the people. and im supposed to still muster the strength to study for ukmppd AND get my face together for solid book photoshoot. that shit is too much. this is why the money that goes to cafe, and the bike ride there is worth it for my sanity. after showering, things felt a bit better. had absolutely no will to study today. ate muesli with a bit of matcha latte.
26 - muesli for breakfast. matcha latte is lyfff ive probably said this before but it ~somehow~ makes me feel normal and not in a slump. like im a regular person. with normal moods. and not wanting to sleep all the time. i try to do ukmppd exercises but the pace is so fucking slow, bcs im distracted by get rich haha,,,. the latest potn update (64) is omgggg the mixed feelings? love? hate? anger? everything and nothing? the ~tension and passion~? im obsessed. watched a ton of bts content today and yesterday lmao.
27 - nasi kebuli for brekkie. went to flavola, im the first customer lmao. tried kopi susu coklat, tasted quite close enough to janjiw’s kopi soklat. had the same ~improved mood and concentration~ effect. tried to read ksk. bought milky banana 1L from puyo to give dajen (its his bday yesterday) (i feel prompted (?) to gift people when theyve given a present to me) (because my love lang is not gift giving at all so i barely think abt gifts lmao). talked with sum 33 ipa guys @ dajens house. yay appropriate amount of social battery charging. tryout with fianti, padi this time. got 67/100.
28 - ate muesli with matcha latte after breakfast. cicil ukmppd. Listened to yoongi's vlive until i fell asleep lol. 2 burger and salad for dinner. omggg hansol revealed his gf.
29 - spent half of my day tidying up the mess that is my room. figured out what to wear for solid book photoshoot with fianti, ara. matcha latte terosss. phd for dinner.
30 - breakfast is muesli with cimory choco hazelnut. mom made matcha chocolate brownies. tryna study. slow pace terosss. read some padi materials. dalbang.
31 - bought vsoy low sugar and multigrain. moved my body a bit to youtube videos. showered. felt better. it also rained (which i love). the pleasant mood only lasted til the evening. did nothing from 7pm even though im not sleepy. cant tell when did i start to sleep
and just like that, 2020 kkeut. its sad to say i dont rly remember much remarkable things this year. other than the trip and memories with minor rotation friends. i just remember wasting my life away in my house. i guess that’s the danger of living a monotone life. sometimes you gotta invest some time to have fun, to have motivation to live on and do things. not doing this makes it difficult to live day by day. and friends. meeting friends, seeing new stuff. that helps me live.
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Flight from Grace Chapter 1 - A small stumble
The long-awaited complete 1st chapter of my WIP novel! I started this over 6 months ago and I’m finally getting into the swing of it.
Synopsis: What happens when a Fallen Angel with no memory of her own eternal past meets a woman who can see her for who she really is? A head on collision between the world as we know it and an eternal battle between the immortals tasked with safeguarding the mortal realm.
Grace can see things she shouldn’t be able to; after all, immortals have gone to a lot of trouble to make sure we can’t see them as they really are, so Something Has Changed, and she and her Fallen Angel will find out what’s going on, and why they seem to always be stuck in the middle of it all.
Themes: Angels and Demons, examination of mortality and our understanding of and belief in the supernatural as well as the eternal nature of existence. The battle between good and evil, and how no one is ever what they seem to be when we look past prejudices and social judgements. LGBTQ+, proper ethnic and cultural representation (read: most characters aren’t straight or white!).
Triggers: If you don’t like stories that put an often irreverant and sacriligeous spin on Christian mythos, this isn’t for you. LGBTQ+ romance, slow burn, non-explicit.
===================================================
“Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven?”
Some neanderthal interrupted my deep contemplation of the double whiskey sour in front of me. Which was very rude. Whiskey sours demand your undivided attention and get cranky if ignored for too long. He should have known that, but either he didn’t know or didnt care, so either way- neanderthal.
He was leaning on the bar with the casual air of someone who has done this same dance too many times, the practiced ease of a used car salesman slapping the roof of a car. At least this one’s breath wasn’t too foul. Not that this hadn’t happened before. Oh no, I’d never been badly hit on in this bar like ten thousand times already. No that never happened. I was able to just sit in peace with my drink for the entire night. Yeah, right. Why do I keep coming back then, you ask? Well, Grace makes one hell of a whiskey sour for one thing.
“Hey, did you hear me?”
Ugh, this one wasn't going away with simply being ignored. Lovely.
“Excuse me?” I looked over languidly, with as much disdainful irritation on my face as I could possibly muster from the depths of my three-drinks-in soul.
“I said, ‘did it hurt when you fell from heaven?’”
His stupid shit-eating leer didnt help my mood any. I wasn’t ever in a good mood if I showed up here, and that’s probably one of the reasons I kept coming back- assholes like this gave me a vent for my foul mood.
“No actually. It’s less of a fall and more of a stumble really. More like getting tossed out of a club by a bouncer than falling down the stairs. Couple of bruises, a minor scrape, more damaged pride than anything really.”
I could see his monkey-brain churning slowly to try and digest my response that didn’t fit his pre-programmed scenario. I half expected to see steam coming out of an ear. God, some men are just so... ew.
“Um, what?”
Apparently I broke him. Well, that happens sometimes, when I give someone a response they weren’t expecting. Which happens more often than I’d be willing to admit to myself.
“I said that getting tossed out of heaven doesn’t hurt as much as you’d think it would. It’s not that far of a tumble really.”
He chuckled, “That’s real cute darlin’, never heard that one before! How’s about you and me find a table so I can hear more about it? Maybe have a look at those bruises, make sure you don't need more…attention.”
Sweet Mother of Mikhail, that was bad. Like even worse than his initial pickup line. I almost had to respect his commitment to such a shitty way of trying to pick me up. He had some balls, that’s for sure, either from drunken stupidity or pure ignorant self-confidence. They say that bravery and stupidity go hand in hand, and here was their shining example.
“Believe me sweetie, you don’t want my 'attention’,” I said softly, for the first time raising my eyes to lock with his glazed gaze. “My attention can become very… uncomfortable.”
He started to smirk for just a split second, but when my eyes met his, both the smirk and the color melted from his face. His mouth hung slack as he felt his soul staring down the opening fiery abyss that he found reflected in my eyes. I watched his mind recoil in horror at the emptiness it saw as it tried futilely to pull back from the horror of empty infinity it was confronted with. I saw in his eyes the sudden awareness of how small and insignificant his place in the universe was, and shrink in horror, trying to flee internally only to find that there’s no escape from your own mind and the finality of human existence.
I looked away just as his eyes started to roll back in his head. No need to cause a scene with him passing out. After all, my whiskey sour was crying from being ignored. As they do.
“I think you should probably go home now Blake,” I demurred softly. “You’ve probably had enough, and your wife would be happy if you tucked the children into bed for once. Oh, and coffee won’t remove the smell of alcohol, so just have a peppermint. Your kids like that smell, reminds them of Christmas.”
He kind of half nodded, like a sleepwalker. I sighed. Hopefully he doesn't have an existential crisis later and just shrugs it off as being too drunk. Hell, maybe he’ll cut back on the sauce. I hate it when I hear about someone offing themselves after meeting me, especially if they have kids. Well, hopefully he just takes the daily inebriation down a notch or two. I can hope, can’t I?
As he shuffled off, lager forgotten at the bar, I hoped he’d be alright. Genuinely. Sure, I enjoyed taking my frustration at being stuck here out on them, but I didn't actually wish them lasting harm. A lesson or two in politeness and decency, a minor scuffle to break up the monotony, but no real damage. That’s what I told myself anyway. Made it easier to pretend to sleep at night. Hope he makes it home ok. Hope his kids get a happy memory of daddy saying goodnight for once. Hope he says he loves his wife, and apologizes. Hah. Yeah. Like that’ll happen. But, what can I say, I’m a foolish optimist at heart. And nothing hurts more than having your hopes crushed. I should know.
Damn. My drink was crying, a small puddle of condensation soaking into the bar napkin it rested on. Again. Another sigh. And one more for the first sigh. I hate sighing. It’s the most comprehensive sound of the acceptance of defeat ever created. The acknowledgment of futility. And I hate that. I thought I’d be fighting to the bitter end, but apparently Destiny had other plans. Fucking Destiny. She’s the whole reason I’m even drinking in the first place.
“Get you a fresh one?”
A sweet silver-bell tinkle of a voice broke my unintentional reverie. Grace was back, checking on me. She knew my peccadilloes by now. She knew how much I hated when my drink got watered down by the ice melting if it got ignored for too long. I nodded.
She smiled pleasantly and slid over a new drink, already prepped.
“I figured, after that creep pounced on ya.”
I frowned slightly. There was something different about this one. Hunh. Oh, the ice. There wasn’t any. There were two black cubes sitting in it instead. OK, why are there rocks in my drink?
I looked up at Grace, still slightly puzzled.
“Oh those? Yeah I noticed you didn’t like it when your drink gets watered down, so I bought some Irish whiskey stones! That way your drink stays cold, but doesn't dilute. Got 'em special, just for you.”
I cocked one eyebrow slightly, “Just for me?”
“Yep! Let’s face it, you’re the only one who comes in here with that kind of class, so I put 'em in the freezer back here with a big 'ol note so Jimmy doesn’t think I’m crazy for keeping rocks in the fridge,” her airy chuckle sprinkled across my ears.
I stared. I was in shock. OK, well maybe I’m being dramatic, but I was still surprised. People don’t normally do nice things for me. Or to me for that matter. If I’m honest, they mostly run away.
“Why…” I couldn't even formulate a coherent sentence. Jesus, get yourself together!
“I dunno, I just figured you don't seem like you have anyone looking out for you, and you seem to attract a lot of the wrong sort of attention, so I thought you could use a nice surprise, y’know, cheer you up a little.”
I nodded, more in surprise than agreement. I literally couldn’t recall the last time someone voluntarily tried to do something nice, just for me, no hope or expectation of reward or compensation. I was probably silent a little too long for a comfortable conversation. Hey, I was revelling in the new experience, cut me some slack.
“Well. Wow, um, thanks.” Yeah real smooth. Sweet Mikhail’s Grave I have no idea how to actually talk to this woman.
In retrospect, that should have been my first clue, but hey, I was a little distracted.
“I appreciate it, that’s really sweet of you.” Ok that’s slightly less glaringly awkward.
“Not trying to be rude at all, but I gotta ask- what’s your deal? Like you come in here all the time, lookin’ like a million bucks, never talk to anyone, get in fights every so often, get harassed like every single time but you keep coming back? I mean, I’m not trying to pry if you don’t wanna talk, but you know, like I’m totally trying to pry!”
Now it was my turn to stare slack-jawed. Oh Fates, how your twists are cruel. I closed my mouth a lot faster than the sot from earlier though, so my pride wasn't too damaged.
“It’s kind of a long and uninteresting story really. Mostly, you make the best whiskey sour. And the people here are…interesting.”
“Honey, there’s no way a story coming from someone who looks like that,” she waved generally up and down at me, “could possibly be boring. Plus, it’s slow, as always, so humor me.”
Sometimes, I can be kind of thick. Slow. Moronic. A nincompoop. A maroon. Several minutes of conversation with this girl and I only just now noticed- she hadn’t looked away from my eyes. She was meeting my gaze with no problem. She wasn't sweating and shaking and passing out. She was looking me right in the eye, just like a normal person, no fear showing on her face. No reaction at all. Just a normal girl, having a normal conversation, with what she thought was another normal person.
“Are…you OK?” Grace looked a bit concerned.
Aw shit, I was staring, and not even trying to hide it. Well now I felt dumb. And, why did I feel dumb? What was up with this girl that she made me feel so self conscious, so uncomfortable, like one of those fainting goats that just freezes and falls over when you blink too hard at them. Speaking of blinking really hard.
“Um, oh, yeah, sorry, I’m fine. Really. Sorry, just not many people actually want to have a real conversation with me.”
Grace leaned over the bar a little, propping up on her elbows, lowering her tone a bit. “Well, I don’t know why, 'cuz you sure seem hella interesting to me.”
“Hunh. Well, I don't know about that. But I would like to ask you something first, if you don't mind?”
“Fire away honey!”
“This might sound odd, but, why aren’t you looking away? What do you see when you look at me?”
She pulled a tiny bit closer. “Nothin’ more than just about the sparkly-est green eyes I ever seen; a dash of blue, like the Bahamas. Somethin’ else I can't quite put my finger on…” as she trailed off, I felt her finger lightly brush the knuckles on my hand that was still holding my drink. “I kinda wanna find out though.”
OK, now that was smooth. Holy fuck, that was really, really smooth. Like two hundred year old Laphroaig single malt filtered through the blessed socks of His Holiness the Pope smooth. Hold up, now she was trying to pick me up? What the hell universe? What’s going on here?
I swallowed, unable to look away now myself. “That’s all? Nothing that scares you?”
“Not yet, sugar.”
Alright, that’s different.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
I grabbed her hand. Maybe a little too hard from the slight wince I saw.
“OK we need to leave. NOW.”
“Hold up honey, we were just talkin’, we ain’t there yet!” She tried pulling back a little.
“No, no, you don’t understand! I’m sorry, but you shouldn’t be able to see that. I can’t explain right now, but we have to figure out how you can see me that way.”
“But my shift’s not over for a couple more hours!”
“OK OK, I’m not being clear, sorry, this is the first time this has happened, so I’m a little shaken.”
“Oh, I’m so sorry!” She actually blushed a little. “I just saw how you shot down every guy who came up to you, and I thought….well, you know, maybe…omg I’m sorry I didn't mean to upset you! I come on strong sometimes, when I’m interested in something, and when you first walked in, I saw those heels and that dress, and I just was like ‘oh wow’ and kinda couldn’t breathe for a minute, you know I don't see many girls come here lookin’ like that and oh God now I’m babbling and someone please shut me up I'm so sorry…”
I put a finger over her lips, gently.
“I’m not upset. Far from it actually. But we have something a tiny bit more urgent than that to address. I’m not who you think I am. Or what, I should say. But more to the point, there’s something bigger going on here. And I need to find out what. Fast.”
“Wait, so you’re not mad I hit on you?”
“We don’t have time for that now!” She recoiled slightly at my vehemence. “No, I’m not upset, but that’s not the point! You shouldnt be able to see my eyes. My real ones anyway. I was too slow on picking that up right away, and I’m sorry, but we have to get out of here, now, because something is different, and in my world, that’s never a good thing.”
“Your world?”
I was getting frustrated. “Yes, but I’ll explain later! I need you to come with me now. We need answers, and we need them fast. So, do you trust me?”
She hesitated. “Yeeeeees? I think? Like I wanna, but I don’t really know you?”
“Good enough for now! Let’s go!”
To her credit, she just dropped her bar towel, grabbed her phone from under the bar and came out from behind it, grabbing my hand as she yelled to the back, “Hey Jimmy! I gotta leave! Personal thing- cover for me?”
Just then, there was a bit of a commotion at the door. Grace turned to look, but I didn’t need to. I already knew what was there. I just clutched her hand even tighter and yanked her towards the back; there was an emergency exit near the bathrooms from what I remembered of that one really bad 'birthday’. Yeah, that was a bad one. But we ran.
Good thing I’m not super tall, wouldn’t want to draw attention, I thought to myself sarcastically. Goddamn heels. Why do I even wear these?
Sounds of glass breaking and shouting reached us as we plowed through the emergency exit into the alleyway. Don’t worry about that now, just keep moving.
“This way!” I pulled her to the front of the alley.
“Holy shit, that’s your bike?” She sounded genuinely impressed. Finally, I wasn’t the only one who had that reaction at seeing it.
“Oh yeah, she’s a sweet ride, and perfect for this situation. Or any situation, really. Jump on.”
I probably should have shut the door behind us, but hey, it was a day for me missing obvious things. The noise coming from the bar was getting louder.
“I’ve never done this before!” Grace exclaimed excitedly in my ear as I kicked my beast to life.
We roared out into the street, my white and gold Valentino’s left sparkling on the pavement where I kicked them. Fuckin’ useless, beautiful shoes. Sigh, they weren’t cheap. Oh well, they’re just shoes.
“Where are we going!?” Grace yelled over the rush of wind whipping our hair like tiny flails of purgatory.
“Not sure yet! But we’re going to find out!”
“I don't even know your name!”
My heart sank a bit.
“Don't worry! Neither do I! ”
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
The bar exploded behind us as it faded into the night thanks to the fabulous Ducati between our legs. Oh and that wasn’t metaphorical- I glanced in the mirror at the sound; it literally exploded. Ball of fire and all. I guess that’s to be expected, what with all the alcohol and what I’d suspected for a while was going on in the basement. Way too many flammable liquids in one place. But that didn't really matter now. All that mattered was getting away from what caused the explosion as fast as we possibly could.
“What the hell was that!?” Grace yelled in my ear. Again. I’m going to have to get some headsets or something if this is going to be a habit. Well, the riding together part, not the fleeing for our lives part anyway.
“I’ll explain as soon as we can talk, promise! For now, just hold on! And don't look behind us!"
“As if I’m gonna let go now!”
That glance in the rear view told me as much as I needed to know, which was more than I wanted, but enough to have an idea of what we were running from. I mean, I figured that’s what it was, but I’m still tired of being right, even after all this time. You’d think I'd be used to it by now.
That pale blue and red glow was enough. Hell, the noise it made had been enough for me to know what it was. And trust me, I was not overreacting by running first. I’d seen that color a few too many times in my life to think that there was anything else to be done except run. Once was more than enough for anyone. Who am I kidding? Most people don't get a chance to see it more than once. Guess I’m just lucky. Or the opposite. Pretty sure I’m the latter actually.
Grace was shivering on my back as we sped away. She’d gone quiet, her mood matching the night around us, the neon signs and street lights reflecting their multi-colored halos in the rain-slicked streets. Fog was starting to rise from the pavement, adding to the soft glow the streets were taking on. Thin, wispy strands curling around street lights and bus stops, blasted into nothing as the bike tore through them, the roar of the exhaust shattering the relative quiet of the late night calm.
Well, it should have been quiet anyway. The explosion of the bar kind of changed that. Then came the sound.
It mixed with the growing whine from the crotch rocket under us, which seemed like a fitting counterpoint to the cacophony of something that sounded like if you’d thrown a hundred maltese dogs into a tornado and then blasted it over a crappy school intercom. I hated that sound. Almost as much as the dogs it reminded me of.
“Aw shit, it saw us.” Time to see if the tires on this baby gripped as well as the kid at the shop claimed they did.
Well, at least there wasn’t too much traffic. Still, even though there weren’t many trucks and accountant-driven sedans to weave in and out of, there were still enough of them that it took a hell of a lot more concentration than my alcohol soaked brain was ready to deal with. Definitely hadn’t planned on being the next Lewis Hamilton after a night at the bar, that’s for damn sure.
“What the fuu….?” Grace’s expletive trailed off in the whipping wind as I kept us weaving in and out and through, gunning the shit out of my bike whenever there was an opening big enough to do so without turning us into extremely messy, if fashionable, pancakes.
“Try not to worry about it! OK I mean, yeah, worry, but not like understand worry!”
“How the hell do you not worry about...that!?”
I took a good look back for the first time as we whipped around a corner, using the rain-slick street to slide without losing any speed. My heart sank. At least it wasn’t in my throat choking me anymore. Sarcastic positivity in the face of death? Yeah that’s my jam. Even if I do keep it to myself. Most of the time anyway.
The damn thing was getting closer. Faster than I thought it could. Damn, tonight just wasn’t my night for noticing things, now was it?
That second of splitting my attention nearly sent us flying and a tired busboy standing at the corner bus stop to the hospital, but we only just missed him, with barely enough room to avoid slamming into the back end of something that should have been parked at a kids soccer game, not getting on the expressway at this time of night.
Slipping into an alley entrance, Grace’s nails dug through the flimsy material I was wrapped in, making me yelp in surprise.
“Sorry,” she muttered.
I was about to tell her it was cool, considering the circumstances, and given that I wasn’t sure if it made me jump because it hurt, or her hands were cold, or because of where they’d slid down to, when we blew out the other side of the alley, causing a literal postcard explosion from the stand I clipped as we bounced out on to the main road again, just in time to swerve hard to avoid becoming Penske poster-girls for a single truck.
"Sweet Jesus fuck! What the hell IS that?"
Goddammit, didn’t I tell her not to look back? I wasn’t going to tell her how the beast chasing us had seen us dart down the alley, and since it couldn't fit through the traffic as neatly as we could, silently charge down the side of the building, slamming into the same shop front that had so recently lost it's postcard stand as it tried to take the same corner, still snuffling the ground and air to track us. I managed to gain us a few precious seconds of lead as it disentangled itself from the fruit cart, re-launching itself down the alley, bicycle wheel still caught in it's whiskers that streamed and whipped behind it.
“It’s running fucking sideways on the buildings!”
Aw shit. She can see it. I was afraid of that.
And that was all the distraction it needed too.
With a last spring off the corner of an empty flower shop, the beast took a massive swipe at us. Come on, come on, make the corner! It's thick talons cut a blazing arc through the rain as it howled. One of its claws caught the rear end of the bike, knocking it heavily to the side, and nearly throwing Grace off. Good thing she’s got a death grip on my hips right now. Oh boy don’t think of that, too distracting right now, that’s how you get killed!
Grace screamed again as the bike was whipped around violently from behind, and Grace she was confronted with a vision not even her wildest nightmares could have come up with. At least, I hope she doesn’t have nightmares like this anymore.
The beast’s jaws opened wide to crush us like a nutcracker on adderall, glowing drool whipping around in thick, viscous strands from teeth bigger than my hand, while she seemed mesmerized by the halo of tentacle-like whiskers that seemed to float in slow motion, despite how fast everything was happening. The beast looked at me, it’s eyes burning red meeting mine as I tried to maintain my grip on the bike that was rapidly being torn from my hands. I was holding on to that tank with my knees in a way that would have made the Russian Women’s weightlifting team proud. I could hear the scream that tried to jump from Grace’s mouth only for it to turn into a slow rush of soundless breath as she slammed into my back from the force of me yanking that bike around as hard as I could possibly manage.
Ground. Street. Tires on. People off. Stay upright. Don’t let go. Run.
The bellow from the beast behind us meant nothing to me now. I was numb, my world narrowing to the few feet in front of me, and Grace behind me. Swerve. Dodge. Car. Bike. Red light. Faster. Green. Faster. Faster. Get away. Car. Car. Bus. Turn.
Suddenly the cars all dropped away. The turnpike. Oh thank God. I opened up the throttle all the way and finally realized I should probably start breathing again.
Grace was trying to yell something, probably wanting an explanation. I mean I can’t blame her, but I said I’d explain! Did it look like now was suddenly the time for it? Then again, maybe it was important.
I turned my head a bit to try to talk to her, but I paused with my mouth still open. The beast was gone.Like gone gone. Vanished. Vamoosed. Not even like really far away gone, just not there any more. I squinted. Yeah, that was a little too easy.
“Did we get away?”
I was actually about to answer her, when a glowing blue shape cashed into us from the side, just as I was starting to finally let my legs relax a little. Everything seemed to slow down. I know, everyone says that, but it’s true! I don’t know, maybe it was the whiskey sours, but as soon as we got hit, the world turned in to super slow-mo as the bike was ripped from my hands, and I felt Grace be pulled away from me.
This thing tossed us like a couple of rag dolls thrown from a child’s stroller being kicked by a football player. Or at least it started to go that way. Somehow, as the bike ground across the pavement, with just my left hand managing to keep any kind of hold on the bike, I managed to swing myself around it like a gymnast on a gold-medal winning vault-horse routine, snagged Grace’s bar apron with my free hand, and with sheer desperate strength, yank all three back together, right as the beast’s slavering maw snapped shut on empty air where Grace’s head had been just milliseconds before. Through pure accident of positioning, my toes raked across it’s eyes as my leg swung around and I slammed them back down on the pegs, jammed the throttle all the way open, even as Grace somehow managed to complete the circle I’d pulled her in, ending by straddling my hips, arms and hair akimbo while we slid sideways, fortunately tires first.
Grace’s eyes were wider than a kid who opened their eyes to Disneyland on a Christmas morning as she slammed into me, and I used our momentum to get the bike fully upright, only barely escaping a second snap from the beast as it lunged again, trying to tear us apart.
That near miss, and the sigh of relief I almost let happen, didn’t get a chance to last long.
Her damn hair was in my face, which at any other time, wouldn’t have been a problem, really, but just at that second, was incredibly, blindingly, distracting. And it might have saved our lives.
Something hot burned into my shoulder and face as the sound of crashing metal and people yelling slammed into me. Hm, spicy.
“Shit! Watch out! Sorry!” Grace called to the one lady who wasn’t running for the hills as we smashed through her food cart. Can you get third-degree barbecue sauce burns? Food trays, sauces and meat all went flying as we dervished our way right through the middle of her street-side restaurant, sweet and spicy and sticky all at once, all over the ground, and all over me and Grace as well. I couldn’t think of anything more than just keeping everything together and moving forward. Run. The only thought occupying my mind. Just run.
“Hey.”
The softness of her voice is what brought me back to the girl squished up against me and out of the rabbit-instinct flight mode I was in.
I don’t know why but for some reason, my brain decided that was the perfect moment to notice that I’d never realized how captivating the color brown could be. Grace’s eyes were less than inches from mine, and I froze for a second. Again.
“I think it’s stopped.”
I glanced back. The beast had been right on top of us when we hit the food cart, but now it was standing there in the middle of the sidewalk, sniffing around for all the world like the biggest, dumbest, glowiest dog you’ve ever seen. OK, a dog that could tear a truck apart like a box of tissues, but still.
“What the hell is it doing?”
“Maybe it’s hungry.”
I didn’t realize I’d said that out loud. I’d never seen one of these things just...stop like that. It didn't make sense.
No time to think of that right now, just enough time to dart down another alley, blocking the beast from view as it sat down to lap up all the spilled barbecued beef at its feet.
As we weaved and darted through alleys and parking lots, squeezing through sidewalks and darting across small streets, I started to recognize where we were now, and had the barest inkling of a plan besides ‘get away without dying.’
“Whatever that thing is, I think it likes barbecue.”
Grace’s whispered comment snapped me back to what was right in front of me, the whole reason I was in this kind of mess again in the first place. .
“Hunh?”
“I think it stopped to eat at the barbecue stand we knocked over. It’s not chasing us anymore- look.”
I tried to check the mirror again, only to find they’d both been ripped off by now, so switched to glancing over my shoulder quickly, and saw no ominous glow behind us, other than the few street lamps on the small boulevard we were going down.
“Barbecue?” I was still pretty confused. Probably drunk too. But definitely confused.
Grace’s laugh was carried away on the night like fireworks swept away in a light breeze. “Well, I dunno what the hell that thing was, but I haven’t met anyone yet who wouldn’t drop everything for good barbecue, honey.”
Raising an eyebrow, I laughed, “Well it’s good to see I’m not the only one here who can make wildly ridiculous comments with horrible timing!”
“Funny the things you think about when you should be focusing on other stuff that’s a little more important, hunh? Like right now, all I can think about is a nice rack of ribs.” Grace grew quieter as her head sank back down on to my shoulder. “Where we headed, sugar?”
“Somewhere close. Safe. I think.”
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
The old loft was just as dank and dirty and run down on the inside as it looked on the outside. Probably worse. No diamonds in the rough here, that’s for sure. Broken glass scattered on the beat up industrial floor scattered the glow of the streetlight through the mist that filled the space. Definitely not up to my usual standard, but hey, we couldn’t really complain too much.
Throwing an old, discarded, and probably moldy, but definitely more disgusting than I wanted to ever touch again, mover’s blanket over the plate window helped to at least hide a little bit of how gross this place looked. Plus, privacy. A quick scan around and I found a pile of old tarps and a couple skeezy mattresses that I definitely wasn’t going to think about where they’d been or who’d done what on them for how long. It’d have to do. A dirty mattress was a small price to pay for still being alive.
"It's not the Four Seasons, but it'll do for now. It's kinda cold- I don't think the building even has heat, but I think we can keep warm enough to make it through the rest of tonight at least."
Grace flopped down heavily on the mattress, exhausted, shoulders slumped, staring vacantly at the floor.
"That was...was that...I don't even know where to start. My brain's been turned to oatmeal. What…? What happened? What in the name of all fucks just happened?"
“Yeah, there’s kind of a lot to unpack here isn’t there?” I just crumpled down into one of the old blankets like a sock puppet being dropped into its nest. “I’m not even sure where to begin.”
“Ya think? Like one minute, I’m trying to mind my business, working my shift at the bar, wondering whether I’m going to have to give another statement to the cops after another bar fight breaks out, and the next I’m getting tossed around like a hot sweet-potato, almost get eaten by a glowing, walking catfish that got beaten a little too hard with the ugly stick, get covered in barbecue sauce, do-si-doed by a goddamn motorcycle ninja, only to wind up in some place that looks like it was lifted straight out of Zillow for Crackheads!”
A snort of wry, tired amusement escaped me. “Yeah, I guess it really does look that bad here. I mean, I’m surprised this place is even still standing after all this time, but you’re right, it definitely looks a bit sketchy.”
“Way to avoid the point, hun.”
“Yeah, I know.” Not sure why, but she kept making me nervous, and the way she was sort of frowning while pinning me down with those sparkling coffee eyes definitely wasn’t helping. Probably just wasn’t used to people making eye contact. Which was the whole reason I was in this mess to begin with. Another sigh.
“Alright. I’ll explain as much as I can. You deserve that much.”
Grace flopped down on the edge of the mattress, chin propped in her hands for all the world like a kid during goddamn story time. How the hell was I supposed to concentrate when she’s doing things like that? Look away! Only way to save myself for now.
“OK, here goes. So the thing you saw? Well, it’s a…” I scowled. “It’s a...sunuvabitch, I don’t really know what it’s called. Alright, further back then. The basics. Got it.
“Supernatural things exist. Like you believe that humans are the highest species on this planet and that you’re all alone in the universe, and no one can quite agree on whether there was anything before or after this life or what happens when you die, right? Well, a lot of what most people believe to be myth or religious superstition is actually, um, real.”
So she hasn’t tried to run away just yet. That’s a good sign, right?
“From what I’ve been able to piece together, from the bits I can remember, what you would call ‘heaven’ and ‘hell’ are real places- they’re just not really visible to mortals. Most of the time. ‘Angels’ and ‘demons’ are real things too, but they’re a little bit different than most people tend to think of them from what I’ve seen.
“I don’t know how many there are, but there’s angels and demons walking around, living just like you and me, every day. The thing is, that mortals like you can’t see them. And that’s where the problem is.”
“Like me?” It wasn’t really a question. Her tone made that clear enough.
“Oh boy. OK, here’s the big one- because with the heaven and hell stuff, most people can be like ‘meh, it’s all superstitious nonsense anyway’ and brush it off. This? Not so much.
“I’m not human. Or mortal. I can see angels and demons walking around plain as day, just like the ones I’ve met can see me. Mortals...see something else.”
“Like the creep at the bar earlier? Did he see...something else? In you?”
“Yeah. On the outside, at first glance, I look like any other girl. But look closer? Well, you saw what happened. People just aren’t ready to see my real nature.”
“But that didn’t happen to me.” Now Grace was looking a little bit confused- but the kind of confused you get when a teacher is explaining something that you know should make sense, even if you were having a hard time getting it.
“No, it didn’t. And it took me way too long to pick up on that. I should’ve realized right away. If I had, maybe I could have gotten you out of there faster and that whole ‘sweet potato’ thing wouldn’t have happened.”
“So what should I be seeing? When I look into your eyes I mean?”
“Probably something along the lines of falling through an eternally expanding universe, a sense that you’re tinier than a piece of sand in the scope of the cosmos, that sort of thing. At least, that’s what I’ve heard from a couple of the ones who were able to be slightly coherent afterwards. There haven’t been many of those over the years.”
“Wow. I definitely don’t see that.”
“And that’s the problem, really. I’ve never heard of something like that happening before. I don’t know what it means, or why you can, or anything! All I know is that something is very, very different, and very, very wrong, otherwise that thing wouldn’t have been after us. And right now, I don’t know if what’s wrong is you, or me, or both of us. But we need to find out if we’re going to not be looking over our shoulders for...what did you call it again?”
Grace laughed. A genuine laugh, not weighed down by worry or terror. “A glowing, walking catfish?”
“Ha ha, yeah, that got beaten too many times with the ugly stick!”
Grace sat up suddenly, nodding sharply to herself. “Alright, well, you’re either batshit crazy, or I owe my gran an apology.” Grace was still half chuckling, but looking very intent.
“Your gran?”
“Yeah, she was super religious, always prayin’, talkin’ and singin’ about god. She must’ve gone to church three times a week! Boy, would she have loved to hear all this.”
“I’ll bet!”
“So, I just wanna make sure I’ve got all the stuff you said- angels are real, and something’s wrong with the fact that I can see your real eyes, and not like, the fires of the Big Bang or something, but you don’t know why that’s a problem or what caused it.. Right?”
“I’d say that about covers it for now, yeah.”
“Alright, I can live with that much for now. I’m clean tuckered out, and you look like you’re about to just fall over any second now. Whaddya say we call it a night?”
“Yeah.” I really could barely keep my eyes open at this point. I guess pretending my motorbike was a juggling pin kind of took it out of me.
Grace popped up, suddenly all business.
“So doesn’t look like this place has a big ol’ tub to dump you in, so we’ll have to settle for a couple of wet wipes. Here, help me get these blankets on to the mattress here. They’re gross, but it’s better than freezing to death.”
“You’re the boss!” Those wet wipes were a pocket-sized blessing, wrapped in foil paper. I’m more of a Chanel and gunpowder type, not so big on the earthy, barbecue scents.
I was starting to stumble a bit as we plopped the discarded blankets down as well as we could in the relative darkness of the loft.
“Probably better to stay dressed with how dirty these blankets are.” Grace frowned as she watched me struggle to pick up one of the heavier blankets a couple of times.
That didn’t even register until much later.
“OK, you, lay down. No more for you tonight. Sleep.”
I couldn’t even argue with her. I just curled up in a ball on the bed, barely aware of Grace pulling a couple of the blankets over me, but I thought I could just make out her arm resting on mine as we both drifted off into the heavy, dreamless sleep that comes when you’ve been pushed to your limits. At least, I kind of hope it was.
=============================================
Story tag list
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Parent-Teacher Night
Tagging: Matthew Davidson & Mercedes Jones ( @indiemercedesjones ) When: August 7, 2019 Where: Lewiston Middle School Notes: Matt’s late to his meeting to talk to James’ 1st grade teacher.
Mercy
Mercedes made her way up the three rows of chairs, placing the name plates down. She had just finished doing most of the meet and greets. She had one last meeting but they seemed to be running late. Walking to her desk she knocked down a stack of papers and bent down to pick it up. Someone knocked on the door. "Come in." She said grabbing the last of the papers before standing fully.
.Matt
Matt thought he’d get out of the station right at 6 but a call that came in at 5 kept in longer than expected and he rushed to the school to get to the whole teacher parent thing set up with James’ first grade teacher. Matt couldn’t get over his son being in first grade and as he hurriedly walked down the hall he felt a giant in there. Matt found the class and went in right when he was greeted by the backside of who he assumed was the teacher. “Hey. Are you Ms. Jones?” He asked as he stood and tried not to find this entertaining.
Mercy
Mercedes nodded moving over to the taller man and extended her hand. "Hi yes I am Mercedes Jones. And you must be Mr. Davidson?" she said taking in his appearance. He was taller than her 5'3 height so it was an adjustment looking up to him when she usually looked down tot he kids. "Nice to meet you. Please have a seat."
Matt
“So...?” He asked asked after their handshake. “Do you prefer Mercedes Jones or am I supposed to call you Ms. Jones? Though I’ve got to admit it makes me want to sing that song.” He delivered this with one of his signature, dimpled smiles. Matt went to a chair and sat, feeling huge in the seat. “Sorry I’m late. Had a fire to put out. Literally.” He settled and leaned forward on this forearms. “Am I the last parent of the night?”
Mercy
"Mercedes is fine, and no thank you no need to sing." His smile wasn' lost on her. "Its okay I was told you would be late. And yes you are. This is just to go over any questions you may have, any needs James might have. So you are a fire fighter?"
Matt
“You sure? I can’t sing with a damn but I do put on one hell of a show.” The thing with Matt was he felt right at home talking to people, even those he just met. “And, I don’t really know what to ask. I did read what you gave out on Monday and it felt pretty straight forward. He seems happy with things so far and likes the kids in his class.” Matt shared and nodded with a smile. “Yeah. Been slinging the ol’ hose for about nine years now.”
Mercy
She looked at him and nodded. "Yeah I am sure. " She said picking up her folder for James. "Yeah well I like to be straight forwards. James is a very bright and fun child. I do see where he gets his sense of humor from though." She nodded. "Well you should come back for career day, I am sure the kids would love to get a look at you in your uniform." She placed her glasses on and smiled. "So I moved James to the Blue reading group. Which is good, he is very advanced for 6 years old, you should be proud."
Matt
What was with this woman? It was like talking to a brick wall that was all business and no joining along. Maybe with the fact she was around kids all day that it must’ve stifled her fun side...”I am proud of him. He’s a good kid and he’s taken over reading stories some time back. He prefers to read them to me but lets me join in whenever he gets too tired but doesn’t want it to end just yet.” Matt thought about the career day and it actually had him grinning. “Do you know when that career days happening? I want to make sure I give notice for it. Maybe see if I can get the guys and the truck over here.”
Mercy
Mercedes nodded. "I can tell. He enjoys music class as well. I know its just the first week but I can pretty much tell when a kid really enjoys learning." She saw him light up and smiled. "Usually its in September. I can give you the date before you leave. We also have the camping trip you might want to participate in. Its just an overnight at the camp grounds but the kids really loved it last year."
Matt
“Has he tried to teach the other kids classic rock songs? I play a lot of that around the house. And awesome. That’s enough time to get the word out.” Matt then realized he had a question. “Have the kids shared what they’ve done for summer? We moved back from Amsterdam and I have pictures he can use to show our time there.” They spent a year and a half there and as much as he enjoyed it, this was home. “Camping, eh? Now that I can get behind.”
Mercy
Mercedes smiled. "Yes, good to know he gets it honestly." She shook her head. "That is next weeks assignment. Pictures are always good. It allows the kids to feel like they were actually there. Though Amsterdam is a very unique place to go too." She handed him the flyer for camp. "I give you enough time so you can take off. "
Matt
“I’ll get the pictures printed by then and let him have fun with picking out which ones he wants to share with the class. His mom moved to Amsterdam a couple years ago and he wanted to be close to her. Not that it did any good because she still hardly saw him.” Too much information? Doesn’t matter, he was still pissed about it. “Thanks, Mercy.” He read over the flyer and knew exactly where this place was. “I went to this camp when I was in 6th grade. I didn’t know it’s still around.”
Mercy
Mercedes nodded and frowned as Matt spoke. "I am so sorry Mr. Davidson. I cant understand parents who dont wanna be around their kids. If I were a mom, nothing in the world would keep me from them." She didnt mean to speak up like that, but absent parents bugged her. "Mercy?" She raised an eyebrow then nodded. "Yeah the kids love it. And it's a great way for parents to bond with their kids."
Matt
He sighed and leaned back on the chair, stretching his leg out some. Damn that felt good, even when this chair felt ready to break under him. “Did I call you that?” He didn’t even realize it and chuckled. “I’ve got a thing of changing people’s names. Shortening them. Guess I did it without thinking.” He rolled his head to the side and looked more at her than he did before. Kind of checking her out but in a subtle way. “How long you’ve been doing this anyway? Can’t be more than a few years. I’d guess this is your first but you seem pretty on top of the show here.”
Mercy
"You did, it's a first I mostly get Cedes." She closed her file, he seemed like he was tired and could use a break he did just come from a fire. "I've been teaching for five years, but I moved here last year. New change and all. And I mean I like to stay busy, it's just me and Chewy so I have more time than some of the other teachers." She stood. "I know you are tired and want to get home to James, so we can cut this short. If you have any questions here." She handed him a paper. "My email and phone number are there. And if I am called or emailed at night I try to answer by the next morning."
Matt
“Cedes, huh? I can see that but Mercy reminds me of Uncle Jesse and I can see myself going that route and possibly annoying with you with that line at some point in the future.” Was he hitting on her? Well.....she is pretty hot and Matt didn’t notice any ring on her finger. “I’m assuming Chewy is a dog or cat and that you’re not actually shacking up with a Wookie. But hey, I’m not one to judge.” His hands went up after he said this and chuckled, acting a damn idiot but still amused by his antics. “Yeah. I should get going. J likes to recap his day while we make dinner together. Thanks for the call. If I do reach out it’ll probably be more by text. It’s easier for me.” He got to his feet and felt wobbly and off balance for a second from being down so long. “Thanks for sticking around to talk.”
Mercy
"Mercedes shook her head. "Uncle Jesse is still hot so I don't mind being called that." She wanted to keep things professional but the image of her dating Chewbacca was too funny. "Chewy is my dog, he's my baby. And don't hate on Wookie love, I heard they give the best cuddles. And text is fine, I don't mind." She stood and when she saw him wobble she went to him holding his shoulders. "You okay?" She looked up to him. "Are you sure the fire didn't mess you up? Do you need to go to the doctors?"
Matt
Matt wanted to get into everything she just said but the reaction she gave, getting on her feet and everything, caused all his focus to land on that instead. “I’m good. That chair wasn’t exactly Matt sized and I hadn’t been down off my feet like that in awhile. But no, no need to rush me to the doctors.” He assured her. “Just seeing you react like that tells me J is in good hands while he’s in your class.”
Mercy
Mercedes nodded. "Yeah, sorry about that. They chairs are pretty much kid friendly and not adult friend, if that makes sense." She smiled, letting him go. "I promise your son will be in great hands! Don't worry. And you are free to come help out anytime you want."
Matt
“You just want me to come babysit the kids while you watch Star Wars.” He said as he laughed. “And I’m still not sure about this Wookie love, but whatever floats your boat there, Mercy.” Matt didn’t bother changing it back to Mercedes. Why should he? “Okay. I think I’ve taken up enough of time tonight. And that’s only because I can hear the floor waxer machine whirring down the hallway.”
Mercy
"Excuse you I will have you know that the kids can watch themselves, I am just a glorified babysitter myself. And don't hate the wookie love boo!" she said with a smile. Looking out the door she nodded. "Yeah he hates it when I stay late. But yeah enjoy your night and say hi to James for me."
Matt
“Then you should put a cardboard cutout of you at the desk and hang out under the actual desk like George Castanza did on Seinfeld. They’ll never know until one of them comes and asks a question. Then they’ll think you’re ignoring them and that’ll create years worth of therapy for that kid.” His damn imagination got ahead of him and he knew it was past time to leave. “Don’t tell me you’re the last one in here? I can at least walk you to your car since you stayed late waiting for my ass.”
Mercy
"Lord I do not want to traumatize the kids." she packed u her bag and slipped it on her shoulder. "Its nothing new I am always late around here." She smiled at him. "Well if you are gonna try and be a gentleman the least I can do is let you."
Matt
“If I was trying to be one I’d have a suit and top hat. Fancy the shit out of it and look like someone straight out of a Jane Austen story. This is just me, doing my Matt thing. And why do you leave so late? I thought teachers usually called it quits around 6.” Matt went to the doorway and walked out to the hall where he looked over the artwork on a bulletin board.
Mercy
Mercedes covered her mouth as a snort came out. "Wow. I can't even believe you said that." She shrugged. "I know they do but most teachers have families to go home too. I like being here, it feels less lonely." She shrugged it off. "Ignore I said that."
Matt
“See. Now you’ve gone and hurt your dog’s feelings. He probably thinks you like being home with him but you’re here instead.” It felt surreal to be in a school after hours. As if he was about to disrupt some ritual the teachers do at night. “But I get it. The nights my parents have James its me and my beer and Netflix. Or Hulu. I like variety.”
Mercy
"He is with the dog walker until I get home, I am not that mean." She locked her door and walked out the building. "Oh so you get your "netflix and chill" on huh? But I use Amazon too."
Matt
“Dog walkers hang out with the dog after they walk them?” Matt’s Silverado was parked on the other side of the building but he’d just hoof it after she left. “Netflix and chill’s when you’ve got someone over.” Matt grinned, winking at her. He needs to stop. “Ah. Prime. I let that go but I heard some shows are worth checking out.”
Mercy
"My neighbor always wanted a dog but her mom won't let her so we worked it out to where she takes care of chewy when I am not there and she gets a dog and gets paid." Did he just wink at her? Was he flirting? No he wasn't she was definitely tired. "I mean I supposed." She reached her car and smiled. "Well thank you, I appreciate you walking me."
Matt
“Almost like you’re co-parenting a dog. That was a real nice thing you did for them. We weren’t allowed pets growing up so I feel that.” He stopped next to a car and did one of those bows and pretending to lift a hat off his head at the same time. “I bid thee a goodnight, fair Ms. Mercedes Jones.”
Mercy
"Yeah well I wanted to make her happy and I did. I love Chewy and this way he gets the best of both worlds." Mat bowed and she smirked. "Why kind sir I do thank thee and wish thee a goodnight as well." She said unlocking her door.
Matt
He laughed, glad she went along with this. Matt walked back a few paces and stuffed his hands into his jeans pockets and waved her off after she backed up and pulled away. Matt knew he skirted a fine line there but it wasn’t his fault his son’s teacher smoking hot. “Not a bad parent teacher conference.” He said to himself as he started the trek to his car. “Wonder what she’ll say if I send a meme as my first text...”
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