#absolute MENACE heisenberg

[thepatronsaintoffilth]

If you’re still accepting requests/prompts

Crawls away, overstimulated meets crawls after them/drags them back with Heisenberg or something else

🛑✋🏾🛑✋🏾 ADULTS ONLY ✋🏾🛑✋🏾🛑

🛑✋🏾🛑✋🏾 MINORS DNI!!! ✋🏾🛑✋🏾🛑

pairing: gender neutral reader x Karl Heisenberg*

*he may or may not still be a lycan in this one (like he is in YSLT), I didn't really give any indication to either him or reader being anything other than human apart from the, uh ... rut-like desperation, let's say (... you'll see what I mean in a minute ;)

cw: dubcon, overstimulation, resistance play, biting, toe-sucking, ass-eating, face-slapping, mouth-covering, real sex-pest Heisendaddy behavior, the whole nine, I'm so serious, a lot of "no"s being ignored in this one

❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️

It was official.

You and Lord Heisenberg had just entered the second hour of what started off as - and was supposed to be - a quick, frenzied tryst in the workshop before descending into what you could already tell was going to be a full afternoon of balls-deep fucking.

You'd thought it was almost sweet at first - the sheer gusto alone was breathtaking.

But then he just wouldn't stop.

He just ... kept ... going.

And going.

And fucking going.

You only knew an hour had passed because when you were lying on the ground - the only thing separating your naked body from the workshop floor being Karl's coat - you'd caught a glimpse of the clock on the wall and realized how much time had gone by.

This is ridiculous, you hiss silently, shuddering and panting as your second - third? Fourth? - climax rips through you.

You feel his mouth between your legs for the 3rd time in the last twenty minutes alone and wince as your senses, pushed into overdrive, start to overload.

This is INSANE, you amend. We'll be here all goddamn day!

You try to tell him as much, but it gets you absolutely nowhere.

At first, Karl is merely content to shush you - whispering sweet-nothings and reassuring you that it would be over soon, that he was so close, you're so fucking sexy, you're going to make him cum so fast.

When that revealed itself to be a fucking lie, you begin to actively resist him - shoving at his shoulders, closing your legs against his gloved hands, turning your head or even biting him when he tries to stick his tongue in your mouth.

He was amused at first ("Feeling feisty, huh?"), but then quickly grows frustrated.

Which in turn earns you a slap in the face and that beautiful dick of his crammed down your throat, effectively silencing your protests.

You feel his balls slapping against your chin with each grunting thrust. His hands grip your head, shoving you up and down his shaft until you're too dizzy to resist.

"Don't wanna bite me now, do ya?" he growls, knowing full well you wouldn't dare.

You can't answer - outside of the embarrassing glkglkglkglk sound he was forcing out of you.

"Huh? Was that a yes? Try it ... See what happens."

He releases you abruptly, shoving you back onto the ground. You blink the spots from your eyes and wait for the room to stop spinning as you cough and sputter, making an even bigger mess of your face.

About a second or two later you feel his hands on your shoulders and his knees beside your hips, caging you in.

You slap his hands away, swearing and grumbling under your breath about what a goddamn menace he is. You manage to rotate onto your stomach and hoist yourself upright on your hands and knees.

In hindsight, this action was probably a little naïve.

You thought shoving his hands away and crawling out from under him was the universal signal for "I would like to stop now."

And for a moment? Karl actually seems to take the hint and back off.

... Only for you to feel his hands on your hips and realize that he had interpreted your movement much differently than you intended.

He buries his face between your cheeks and starts tonguing your ass, panting and huffing like he can't get enough.

Which in all likelihood, he can't.

You gasp at the feeling of his facial hair tickling you. Then you crumple, chest-down, to the ground as you feel his tongue probing you, heedless of the fact that you're covered head to toe with sweat and debris.

Your right thigh starts to wobble. The wobble becomes an spastic shake as the sensation becomes so intensely good, its almost unbearable.

The shake creeps outward to the rest of your body as Karl adds his fingers to the mix, muttering under his breath about how amazingly responsive you are as he fucks his middle, index and ring finger into your ass.

Between the effort to stay somewhat upright and not faint outright (even now you can't deny that the man has gifted fingers ...), it's a miracle you have the coordination to try evading him again.

When he takes his fingers out of you, you shake his hands off your hip and crawl quickly in the direction of the door, intending to use your momentum to carry to you feet, out the door, to freedom and maybe a shower because you're an absolute mess.

His grip on your ankle begs to differ.

Your Lord's touch is hard and unforgiving as, with one harsh tug, he pulls you right back where you started.

"Karl - !"

"We're not. Done yet."

He flips you onto your back as you get tangled up in his coat sprawled out on the ground. You drag it with you to cover yourself. He pushes the garment up with an impatient grunt, re-exposing your lower body. He thrusts himself inside you in one brutal, sloppy stroke.

"For fuck's SAKE, Karl - !" you cry out before his gloved palm slaps down over your mouth, stifling the swearing diatribe you were about to spit in his face.

"Shut up. And quit running from me," he rasps, his tone caught somewhere between smoldering irritation and what can only be growing desperation.

You manage to jerk your face out from under his hand long enough to snap, "Then get ON with it!"

"We're almost done, I told you."

"You said that an hour ago!"

Karl freezes. Then he glares down at you and coldly asks, "Are you clock-watching?"

An icy tendril of fear creeps down your back. You shake your head. You might be willing to put your paws on him when he goes too far, but you know better than to wound the man's pride - the one sore point that might legitimately get you killed, even with all you've come to mean to him.

"N-No, I -!" you begin, only for his hand to come down over your mouth again.

"Good. Now quit you whining!" he growls as he starts fucking mercilessly into you again with renewed vigor. "We're almost there."

He lets go your mouth and gathers you closer to him, the increased pressure and friction driving you that much closer to insanity. You feel another orgasm building, and you can tell this one's going to be messy.

"K-Karl, baby ... Please ... Give me a -"

"Shh, shhhhhhh," he whispers. "Almost there."

"Karl ..."

"Almost there. Almost ... Almost there"

Roughly half an hour later, the two of you finally get "there".

After several detours, of course.

Your Lord felt compelled to fuck your mouth again.

Then he spanked and berated you for protesting and trying to ward him off.

Then he sucked your toes greedily (a concerning first, since he'd never shown any interest in your feet up to this point) before finally, at long, long last, cumming inside you before collapsing on top of you.

"See? That didn't take so long, did it?"

You manage to slap him twice over his head before he even processes through the haze of post-orgasm bliss that you're striking him.

He look at you blankly for a moment, the depths of his eyes cold and almost transparently remote as he floats back down to Earth. You're reeling back for a third time when he catches you hand without even looking.

"Oh, I see ... You haven't had enough yet."

"Get OFF me, you oaf!"

"You should have told me so, buttercup. I would have held off a little longer."

"I swear I'll claw your eyes out if you don't leave me ALONE!"

He rolls his eyes.

"Yeah, that's right, talk dirty to me. That's the way to get me off your ass."

"FUCK YOU."

He snorts.

"You will, if you'd just hold still. So impatient ... It's like you're trying to get me hard again."

"Karl - !"

Whatever you were trying to say is lost in his mouth as he kisses you till you quiet down.

And he keeps going.

- Saint

P.S. - My ask box is still open for requests! This was so much fun, and I can't wait to get more. Also, shoutout to the anon who sent me this. I love a good yanked-back-after-crawling-away kinda vibe 😘😘😘

[ilovedonnabeneviento]

Heisenberg is an absolute menace

[i-cant-sing]

I have risen to cause violence and death by fluff!!! Yanderes are a force of nature but so am I! 😡

Me 🤝 You

being weaklings to chonky babies

Y’know how squeaky toys make that squeak sound when you squeeze them? How would the Platonic yanderes of your choosing react to squishing the chubby baby reader’s cheeks and they hear this squeak sound? It tickles the baby reader so she giggles cuz we don’t harm chonkers in this household 😤

Ayyyeeee chonky babies are the best babies!

Yandere Hades:

in tears. Actual tears.

Like how are you so goddamn adorable

Constantly holds you, kissing your cheeks every few minutes while you try to get off his lap and play with Cerberus. But he's not letting you go.

Actually hides you away from other gods so that they don't become obsessed with you like he has. He even has a hard time sharing you with Persephone, who is content with seeing her two babies playing with each other.

Has this feral look in his eyes when someone tries to take you away, calling you "MY PRECIOUS!"

Yandere Hawks:

His little baby bird. You remind him of when little birds chirp.

Takes so many videos of you, his chonky little baby.

Kisses your cheeks several times a day, always making sure to send a video to Enji (you know so that Enji can become obsessed with you too and the two of them together could become yandere parents after he drops that hoe Rei)

Yandere Toji:

Laughs whenever you giggle when he kisses your cheek, pushing his face away, saying that it tickles.

Loves feeding you all kinds of food, enjoying how you eat the food with gusto

His heart bursts with awe when he has to slip on your shoes on your tiny, chubby, fat cannoli feet.

Blows raspberries on your belly, chuckling as you laugh so much, you barf.

Yandere Sukuna:

100% has tried to take a chomp of your cheek, but got startled the first time it squeaked.

From then on, he pokes your cheeks a lot, especially when you're mad. He'll keep on poking it until you either "hmmph" and turn away from him, or suddenly whip around and whack his hand away.

Jokes around that your cursed technique lies in those pink chubby cheeks of yours.

Growls in warning if someone else even tries to touch your cheek. Nope, only he gets to play with them.

Yandere Ares:

Laughs when you let out a war cry before charging at him, quickly swooping you up as he pushes your cheeks together before smooching them. "Such a soft baby, how will you ever harm me?"

Absolutely shows you off. Like goes to Olympus and the Underworld, holding you from your armpits and announces "Look at this chunky baby. This is the baby of a god. She is a complete menace, a force to be reckoned with. My child, completely ready to shed blood and take over the world- oh darling, no. Stop chewing on Cerberus's tail. No, no, you don't need to go to Zeus. Baby, come back-"

Yandere Alcina Dimitrescu:

She loves you so much. She loves you so very much.

Loves to dress you up, her cold dead heart warming whenever you would giggle and peak at her from under her cap, giving her a toothy smile.

Enjoys how your cheeks spring back whenever she kisses them deeply.

Also one to show you off, especially to Heisenberg. "Look at this child, Heisenberg. Look at her. She's beautiful, heartbreakingly adorable, and also very smart. She can spell backwards and forwards. Just yesterday, she spelled "Bob". Genius! Wait, Y/n, sweetie, don't chomp on my blades. They're sharp! You're gonna cut your tongue-"

[wallflowerimagines]

(I'm sorry I keep sending stuff, I promise no rush) The Lords reacting to Reader in formal wear/dressing up in much nicer clothes than they're used to

Y'all, I'm sorry, but THIS HIT ME SO HARD IT BUMPED TO THE TOP OF THE LIST. Dress up time, Let's goooo

Alcina Dimitrescu

Well now, don't you look absolutely darling!

There's a good chance she gave you the outfit herself, so that's just as much of a compliment to you as it is to her own taste, but honestly? Valid. You do look amazing. Alcina knows how to dress you.

She likes you best in sharp lines and classic looks. A lot of structured tops and loose, more flowy skirts and pants. When you also make a point to accommodate her aesthetic and use her House Colors?

She knew she liked you for a reason 💕💕

Alcina also takes this opportunity to flirt with you a bit.

Compliments, compliments, compliments until you're lightheaded with the praise.

She likes to play with your hair a lot normally, but now she's also straightening the lapels of your jacket, or undoing the ribbon on your skirt to lace it up 'properly'.

She is HANDSY.

She even pulls you in front of a mirror to make comments about how good you look next to her. A real pair, wouldn't you say? Maybe you'll dress up for her a little more often...?

With attention like this, I don't know how you'd say no...

Donna Beneviento

Oh, you like to dress up? You like to dress up and you didn't tell Donna?

She's taking this as a personal insult.

(Big Miette vibes 😠)

Angie cackles, because you're in for it now. All the dolls in the Manor have been a victim of Lady Beneviento's dress up moods at one time or another, now it's your turn!

Donna ushers you into a little room, tosses a bunch of different outfits in behind you, and tells you not to come out until you've changed. It's the most passionate you've seen her about anything.

She's given you dresses, suits, kilts, skirts, saris, pants, you name it, all in different styles, but all of it is in your size?

Turns out, Donna has been making clothes for you in her spare time. She didn't know what you liked, so she just...made everything?

You pick out something you're comfortable with and step out of the room, and Donna makes a happy little squeak noise.

YOU LOOK GREAT❤️❤️❤️!!! And it's something she made for you, so that makes it extra special!

Could you...try on something else for her? Maybe? 👉👈

(With a resigned sigh, you go back into the room. Looks like you have to cancel your afternoon plans...)

Salvatore Moreau

Respectfully, 👀👀👀

Moreau looooves you getting all dressed up. You don't have to, but you did! He's so flattered that you showed up at the reservoir in something so fancy. The fact that you think he's worth the effort is just... so nice!!!

He wishes he could host you somewhere other than his rinky dink little house, but he'll make the best of it!

(He also wishes he had something of his own that was even just a little bit fancy. If the both of you dressed up he could almost call this a date...)

His favorites to see on you are loose, airy silks or comfortable, soft textures. It's so delicate, it feels like a perfect fit for you!

He also loves the way the wind goes through it, it makes you look like a painting ❤️

Because he's going on and on about it, and he's so obviously enamored with the idea of feeling of it between his fingers, you let him touch your outfit. He puts his hand on it, letting out little appreciative noises, when suddenly his fingers press down a little bit, making the fabric slide gently against your skin and--uh--

😳

Salvatore needs a minute. Maybe even a long swim.

Karl Heisenberg

Well shit, now he has to mess you up! 😔

You do look very nice, and Karl will definitely give you a little wolf whistle in appreciation, but he is also a gremlin with very little impulse control. You're getting a noogie, do not attempt to resist.

Smack his hands away all you like, but the minute you let your guard down, Heisenberg will mess with a part of your outfit. He'll undo your tie, pop open a button, steal a piece of jewelry, just make a general menace of himself. If you really complain, he'll stop and apologize, but he's satisfied since you look a little less formal.

Actually... Something about you dressed to the nines but with your hair all ruffled and a big grin on your face, uh... Kind of does it for him?

Like, he was the one who popped open the button on your jacket and made it fall open. He was the one who snapped the strap on your dress and gave you that mark on your skin. He made you breathless from laughter with his comments on your 'fancy schmancy' outfit.

You were so put together, and he made you just a little bit undone.

...Karl shakes off his blush and throws an arm around your shoulder. These are thoughts for later.

[finn-writes-stuff]

Hey! Gotta say that you're absolutely amazing for blessing us with all of your headcanons. I was wondering if you have any headcanons for how the Dimitrescu women would act during an argument with their SO?

There really isn't much emotional intelligence in this household

House Dimitrescu x Reader

Fandom: Resident Evil Village

Format: Headcanons

Warnings: arguments with a partner, being talked over

Gender-Neutral Reader

RE8 Masterlist

Commission Info

Alcina

Alcina does not enjoy or often tolerate arguments with you. She views them as disrespectful for the both of you.

She would much prefer to talk things out calmly, but she has a bad habit of talking over you when she's frustrated.

In a proper argument, her voice is all tense, held tight away from a yell. She thinks it is undignified to yell at you.

If she's really annoyed, she'll shush you. It's patronising and annoying, call her out on it.

It's actually very funny to compare the way she argues with you vs with Heisenberg.

She has a lot of respect for you, and her arguments are very subdued.

Bela

Bela takes heavily after her mother, and she tries to emulate her opinion on arguments.

But she also has two sisters, so she's very good with arguments.

She likes being right and really doesn't like being proved wrong. This means she is never really able to back down from an argument.

Arguing with her is frustrating cause she keeps going "I don't want to argue with you, love. However-"

Usually she's good at explaining her side of the argument though. She always has reasoning to back up what she's saying, and it generally makes sense.

She will apologise afterwards for being difficult with you.

Cassandra

Cassandra is a menace who thinks it is funny to make people mad.

She is definitely the one who starts the majority of arguments with her sisters, just for the sake of being difficult and making them mad.

She does not want to make you genuinely upset, she adores you. However, she is still a bastard.

Playfully arguing is very common with her, it’s just how she shows her affection.

She is a little bit difficult to have a serious conversation about problems with, but she will do her best for you.

It’s just awkward cause she doesn’t know how to deal with it. She doesn’t want to argue or joke about it cause she knows it’s an important conversation.

She argues with pretty much everyone but you.

Daniela

Perpetual baby of her family, she's a little too used to getting her way.

She doesn't argue so much as she just pouts.

If you don't give into it though, she'll usually get over whatever she was pouting about, and more often than not, forget about it.

If she has an actual problem with you, she'll ask her family for advice on how to talk to you about this.

Their advice can vary in its helpfulness, but they sure are doing their best.

She'd rather convince you of something rather than argue about it with you.

[thedietelf]

bc apparently im fixated on two things right now-- karl heisenberg just fucking------yeeting map bots across the damn pizzaplex is a good image

freddy seeing karls obnoxious hammer: sir im afraid we don't allow--er--weapons in this facility

karl "shut your damn hole" heisenberg would be a menace and would absolutely massacre children at the raceway and at fazer blaster

[fernisworm]

Lycan!Karl Heisenberg x Reader Headcanons (Pt3)

[an;

I haven’t posted in a while so I thought I’d upload this since it’s been sitting in my drafts for a while LMAO

(PSA: I touch on some of these HC’s in previous posts)

some more Lycan!Karl brainrot for the soul amirite 😎😎

-

🎕 You can find Pt 1 here! (& Pt 2 here!)

❀ Characters: Lycan!Karl Heisenberg x (Gender Neutral!) Reader

❀ Warnings: N/A

✿ You can find all my stories here!

✿ My requests guide is here! (And you can place a request here!)

-

🌟 Karl can actually understand the lycans almost perfectly, and funnily enough, they seem to understand basic English too

🌟 “ *assorted lycan growling and barking* “

🌟 “What? No, you aren’t all sleeping in the factory! I don’t care how cold it is outside, fur-for-brains!”

🌟 anyway, they all slept in the factory 

🌟 Karl actually regards most of the lycans in a familial way and likes to take care of them in any small way he can

🌟 He even went as far as to reinforce the Stronghold for them to keep it warmer in the winter 

🌟 While the lycans have names, they aren’t human names

🌟 It’s kind of hard to translate “grrrgrg BARK BARK BARK grgrgrgrg AWOOOO” into English

🌟 So instead Karl has various nicknames for the lycans, such as; fur-face, fur-for-brains, fur-freaks, etc. (Just to highlight the extent of his creativity)

🌟 You actually get along quite well with the lycans 

🌟 Heisenberg is very protective of you, however

🌟 He doesn’t mind you interacting with the lycans but is always sure to keep a watchful eye on the situation

🌟 One time he actually got really jealous because you were giving a lycan more attention than him (which really wasn’t that much more, all things considered)

🌟 The following night he disappeared for a while and you heard loud snarling, barking and the like from outside the factory

🌟 Karl returned later looking rather pleased with himself

🌟 The lycans avoided you for nearly an entire month before you got Karl to confess that he had threatened all of them to stay away from you “or else”

🌟 You made him apologise and scolded him for being worried over such a thing

🌟 He blamed it on his wolf blood (being territorial and overprotective) but you knew better and that he was just a big whiny man-baby

🌟 Tying into my point from before; surprisingly, the lycans prefer the Stronghold over the factory itself and you guessed it had to do with the factory being too overwhelming for them (similarly to how it worked up Karl sometimes)

🌟 But every now and again it might get particularly cold and frosty and the lycans will ask Karl if he can let them into the factory for a while

🌟 Usually he says no, but you always try to convince him otherwise

🌟 “But Karl, it’s so cold outside! Pleeeease can you let them inside??? Just for the night!!! 🥺😢🙏🙏“

🌟 “(Y/n), if I keep caving to every request they ask of me they’re going to think I’m going soft!! I cannot have that, I am a very mean and tough alpha wolf!! >:(”

🌟 “ *you proceed to smooch Karl on the cheek* “

🌟 “...ⁱ ᵐᵉᵃⁿ ⁱ ᵍᵘᵉˢˢ ᵗʰᵉʸ ᶜᵃⁿ ˢᵗᵃʸ ᶠᵒʳ ᵒⁿᵉ ⁿⁱᵍʰᵗ ⁱᵗ'ˢ ʷʰᵃᵗᵉᵛᵉʳ ⁱᵈᶜ”

🌟 It’s fair to say that you’re usually able to convince him to open the factory up to them

🌟 The lycans are often restricted to the lower levels, but they don’t mind since that’s where it’s the warmest anyway

🌟 When they do end up staying in the factory for a bit Karl makes sure to lock away the Soldats and Haulers 

🌟 (mostly to stop the lycans from coming into harm’s way, but also because overall the lycans are probably a better defence system than Karl’s experiments lmao)

🌟 One of the biggest things you’ve had to help Karl work on is his ability to control his own emotions

🌟 Prior to you living in the factory with him he used to be very destructive, transforming on every whim he got without really trying to fight his werewolf blood

🌟 When you first moved in, and you didn’t know anything about Karl’s lycan side, it made things very difficult for him since he was so used to wolfing-out whenever he felt the need to

🌟 His complacency with random transformations actually caused him to wolf-out several times during meetings

🌟 You weren’t present for any of them but when he recalled the memories you could tell they were somewhat embarrassing for him

🌟 He told you that times like those were when Mother Miranda’s true disgust was on full display

🌟 Karl always insisted that he didn’t give a fuck about anything she said, but you knew it still affected him sometimes

🌟 After all, Mother Miranda was the only parental figure that he’d had in his life in a very long time. How could her words not have some affect on him?

🌟 It became a lot easier for Karl after he told you he was part lycan, but prior to that there were some very close calls

🌟 He would disappear randomly, and for varying amounts of time without an explanation

🌟 One time you nearly caught him wolfing out so he had to lock the door and find a way to the bottom levels of the factory so he could sneak out without you seeing him

🌟 Of course all of this was made ten times harder by the fact he was in werewolf form by that point

🌟 Heisenberg decided you had to know about his lycan side when you started blaming yourself for him acting out

🌟 He knew he wasn’t perfect, not in any capacity, but god forbid you blame any of that on yourself

🌟 He was relieved that his confessed seemed to disperse almost all of your worries

🌟 Due to your combined efforts, and some realistic practice on volunteers such as Lady Dimitrescu, Karl has a far better grip on his werewolf transformations

🌟 Even around full moons he finds himself able to calm his emotions and stop himself from wolfing out

🌟 Karl (along with all the other lords) are so very grateful for everything you’ve done to help him

🌟 But Heisenberg insists he’ll kill you if you ever tell a soul that he’s helping Moreau control his own unpredictable transformations

🌟 “Aren’t you just the sweetest big brother omg 🥺🥺“

🌟 “SHUT UP I WILL LITERALLY KILL YOU IF THIS GETS OUT”

🌟 Whenever Karl wolfs-out (or just transforms in general tbh) all his clothes get torn to smithereens, so you have to do your best to persuade Donna to make him some more

🌟 Especially now since he was literally down to his last set of clothes

🌟 But you can imagine she was still quite angry at Heisenberg for literally breaking into her house and gnawing on Angie like a chew-toy

🌟 But since she was the only seamstress in town you had to try an appease her in someway

🌟 It didn’t help that Karl had recently dug up her garden

🌟 Like what the fuck Karl we need Donna to like us you freak-show

🌟 Either way Karl was always running out of clothes, and fast

🌟 He had a small plethora of sewing knowledge, from years of patching up his own clothes, but that wouldn’t nearly be enough to fix the ribbons-worth of material he had left

🌟 Anyway you made Karl apologise to Donna and (especially) Angie 

🌟 “I’m... sorry.”

🌟 “For...?”

🌟 “For being way too epic for you losers to handle hehehe 😎😎”

🌟 You slapped him behind the head and made him apologise again- properly this time

🌟 Donna (begrudgingly) decided to help out and make Karl some new clothes

🌟 Despite being an absolute menace, he was still her brother

[highlifeboat]

I'mma be selfish about those winter asks: all of them. All the couples/OCs. Your good content dragged me into this hell (AKA AU you made that is so good and fun to read and I look at when I want to enjoy stuff) and now you have to deal with me (enjoying it all).

STRAP YOURSELVES IN BOIS IT’S GONNA BE A LONG ONE–

(Separating by Ships rather than Questions so it’s easier to read. I also realize it’s not technically ALL the ships, but it is all the OCs. In my defence, this is long as hell lmao.)

Miacina:

1. Who makes the other hot chocolate? 

Mia always makes hot chocolate for Alcina, mostly because if Alcina is going to have a hot beverage, hot chocolate isn’t her first choice. She’s more of a tea drinker. Of course, she’s always appreciative of Mia bringing her pretty much anything as a nice little gesture. And she has to admit, her wife really does make an excellent hot chocolate.

2. Who listens to Christmas music way too early?

Mia is a menace with Christmas music. Alcina loves the music as much as the next person who hasn’t worked retail, but it will be the beginning of November and Mia will go from Spooky Season right into Christmas Chaos and start digging out Alcina’s Christmas records.

3. Who is excited for trimming the Christmas Tree?

For a third time, Mia loves decorating the tree. Alcina’s happy to help her (Which usually just means getting the top and putting the star on), but for the most part it’s actually Daniela and Max who help Mia with getting the tree ready. Sometimes Cassandra helps, too.

4. Who puts up the Christmas lights?

Alcina. Because she’s the one who can actually reach without a ladder. Mia is very adamant about helping, though.

5. Who wants to go see the neighborhood Christmas lights?

Mia, for sure, though Christmas lights within the Village are kind of minimal. The other Lords sometimes have some nice lights set up, though. Granted they could probably dec out every room in the damn castle and do a tour of lights that way. (How do they get power for this? I dunno, probably a comically long extension cord from Heisenberg’s factory.)

6. Who bakes cookies?

Mia. She used to do it all the time with her grandma and mom as a kid, and she does her absolute best to try and make cookies even half as good as those. In an odd mirror of events, her and Melony make Christmas cookies together and it’s such an amazing bonding time for them both.

7. Who wraps the presents?

Alcina. You might think it’d be a pain in the ass for her… and it is. She usually ends up getting some of the maids to help her. Mia has tried but she’s actually not very good at wrapping stuff. (Plus she can get a little distracted.)

8. Who hits up Black Friday sales?

Both of them. Look, sometimes the Duke has some good post-Christmas discounts and the two will buy each other a kind of “Christmas Bonus” gift (aka, one buys the other something they see that they REALLY want. Usually something that would cost an arm and a leg any other day)

9. Who wants to build a snowman?

Mia always wants to, and then she actually goes outside and remembers how fucking cold it is. It doesn’t always stop her, though, Alcina has gone outside to find Mia slapping a pair of boobs onto a snowman. It’s actually a little sad watching Mia make snowmen on her own, since the girls can’t go out. Alcina usually ends up joining her.

10.Who starts a snowball fight?

Mia would, but that’s the one thing Alcina doesn’t really enjoy. Both because she’s at a huge disadvantage, but also because she’s a little worried about hitting Mia in the face too hard and hurting her. So the two of them don’t really do snowball fights.

11. Who wants to cosy up to the fire?

Alcina, though Mia is always happy to cuddle her wife by the fire. They’re both always cold, especially in winter, so cuddling under a blanket while near a toasty fire and ripping hot chocolate is like heaven for them.

12. Who looks best in a jacket?

Alcina, even though she doesn’t wear a jacket because she can’t really… feel cold. But Mia has to be bundled up in 3-4 layers PLUS a big puffy coat otherwise she’ll whine about how cold it is. As you can imagine, it’s not the most flattering look.

13. Who wants to see the Christmas parade?

Again, not a huge thing in the Village, but Mia sometimes talks about how she always got excited for it.

14. Who still believes in Santa?

Mia. Alcina isn’t going to tell her otherwise, either. Mostly because she can’t tell if Mia actually does still believe in Santa at 37 years old, or if she just enjoys the idea that Santa exists and pretends. Either way she finds it very cute.

15. Who throws the Christmas party?

Alcina. She holds one every year for the other Lords. They tend to go well, until someone gets far too drunk and a family spat happens and suddenly Mia and Moreau are fighting, Donna’s having a panic attack in the corner, Heisenberg’s hanging from the chandelier, Alcina’s ugly wine-drunk sobbing, and Miranda is about to kill everyone in a 500 foot radius if anybody looks her in the eye.

16. Who picks out matching ugly sweaters?

Mia, and she always manages to find the tackiest thing ever, that she’ll then have to bring to Donna and ask her to tailor the same thing for Alcina. Alcina despises the ugly sweaters. She finds them rather uncomfortable and itchy. But she can wear them for a little while to make Mia happy.

17. Who makes homemade gifts?

Mia tries to, especially for Alcina, but it doesn’t always work out very well for her.

18. Who is the best gift giver?

Alcina, she knows Mia like the back of her hand and always manages to get the perfect gift for her small wife. But she always appreciates whatever Mia gives her for Christmas.

19. Who wants a kiss under the mistletoe?

Mia, even though she could get a kiss from her wife literally any time she wanted. She insists the mistletoe kiss is special and for good luck. Alcina doesn’t believe that, but she’s also not going to turn down a kiss.

20. Who wants to go caroling?

Mia always wants to, but Alcina won’t let her. Sometimes she manages to get the girls in on singing carols with her around the castle, though. It bugs the staff immensely.

21. Who is bad at ice skating and keeps falling on their butt?

Bold to assume either of them can ice skate. Alcina has minimal experience with it, and Mia’s never really done it before. That said, they’d probably try to learn how to do it together and it’d be a really cute time of trying to help each other balance and whatever. They’re both falling on their asses, though.

Belena:

1. Who makes the other hot chocolate?

Bela is queen of randomly bringing Elena hot beverages in general. It’s usually tea, but she does bring Elena hot coco, and Elena always tells her how good it is. Bela doesn’t usually drink it herself, though. It’s mainly a thing she makes specifically for Elena.

2. Who listens to Christmas music way too early?

Way too early is a bit of an over statement, but Elena is the first one getting into the Christmas spirit in general, and therefore is the first of them listening to Christmas songs.

3. Who is excited for trimming the Christmas Tree?

Bela gets the most excited for it. She always loves doing the tree at Christmas time, even with her sisters being chaotic. She’s always found it to be a very nice family activity, and she has a lot of fond memories of it.

4. Who puts up the Christmas lights?

Bela helps her mom put them up around the castle, as part of her Tall Person Privilege.

5. Who wants to go see the neighborhood Christmas lights?

I think Elena would be the one who wants to go see Christmas lights. In some world or AU where they could, Elena would be dragging Bela out to go see them every other day. (Of course Bela would happily go with her. She just needs an extra layer or two.)

6. Who bakes cookies?

They’d try to bake cookies together, and I think they’d be pretty good with it. They’d be really basic chocolate chip cookies, though. Not anything fancy.

7. Who wraps the presents?

They usually wrap gifts together, though Bela usually ends up wrapping more because of Elena’s bad hand.

8. Who hits up Black Friday sales?

Neither would brave the crowds of Black Friday, even if it is just the Duke. There’s nothing worth potentially being shoved around for they can’t get any other day.

9. Who wants to build a snowman?

Most likely Elena, for old times sake, and Bela will watch from the window with the aforementioned hot chocolate waiting for her girlfriend to get cold and come inside to cuddle.

10.Who starts a snowball fight?

Also would probably be Elena if given the chance, and if it wouldn’t burn Bela’s skin off.

11. Who wants to cosy up to the fire?

Bela’s a lot more adamant about sitting near the fire in the winter. Elena does want to join her, but she still has a bit of a hard time being too close to an open flame. She is trying to work on it. Because she feels bad making Bela either sit by the fire on her own, or have to stay with her on the couch/bed and settle for cuddling for warmth. (Bela insists she doesn’t mind. Elena still feels bad, though)

12. Who looks best in a jacket?

Hands down, Elena. It’s hard for Bela to find a jacket that actually fits her properly since she has a long torso.

13. Who wants to see the Christmas parade?

I think Bela would be really interested in seeing a Christmas parade, even if she doesn’t really understand the point of standing in the cold for an hour and a half watching cars pull giant decorated trailers down the road.

14. Who still believes in Santa?

Bela, but she won’t actually admit that to anybody. She acts like she doesn't, to seem mature, and because Cass would 100% tease her about it. Because it’s fine when Daniela, the delusional childish baby of the family, believes in him. But Miranda forbid the eldest of them still does.

15. Who throws the Christmas party?

Probably Elena, but it would most likely just be a family get together more than a party. (If she… had any family left, anyway)

16. Who picks out matching ugly sweaters?

I like to think Elena would make them their ugly sweaters. Girl can knit, so they’re usually nice and soft, just with some ugly Christmas design. Bela loves them

17. Who makes homemade gifts?

Elena mostly. And it’s usually clothing.

18. Who is the best gift giver?

Very dependent on which one you ask, Bela will argue Elena is always so thoughtful when it comes to gift giving which makes her the best, but Elena will argue Bela actually knows what to get everyone which makes her the best.

19. Who wants a kiss under the mistletoe?

Bela, and she stands under it any chance she gets in order to receive a mistletoe kiss.

20. Who wants to go caroling?

Elena would want to go if other people were going, Bela would just go along to be supportive

21. Who is bad at ice skating and keeps falling on their butt?

Bela, because she’s never actually skated before. Because she literally can’t go outside to skate. Elena would love to teach her if they were ever given the opportunity, though.

Mecassa:

1. Who makes the other hot chocolate?

Melony will make Cassandra hot chocolate anytime she can during the cold months. It’s her way of making sure Cassandra stays warm, and she greatly appreciated it. Cassandra also makes Melony hot chocolate, even during summer months, though, because it’s her girl’s comfort drink.

2. Who listens to Christmas music way too early?

Neither of them really like Christmas music enough to listen to it early, though Melony probably starts singing carols sooner than Cassandra does.

3. Who is excited for trimming the Christmas Tree?

Melony, mostly because she’s never done it before. She has a lot of fun doing it, too, even if she can really only help with the lower branches.

4. Who puts up the Christmas lights?

Cassandra, but she’ll lift Melony up so she can help out.

5. Who wants to go see the neighborhood Christmas lights?

Melony, girl loves the look of Christmas lights. Especially the blinky colourful ones. If she could, she’d like to have them up all the time.

6. Who bakes cookies?

Obviously, Melony does with Mia. But Cassandra does pop in to “help” (aka; eat the raw cookie dough and be a general menace towards her girlfriend, and mom)

7. Who wraps the presents?

For the most part, it’s a Melony job. Cassandra does try to help, though. (And everyone can tell when Melony has wrapped one vs Cassandra)

8. Who hits up Black Friday sales?

Cassandra, but she never actually buys anything. She mostly just goes to waste everyone’s time.

9. Who wants to build a snowman?

Neither. Melony does’t really like the snow, and Cassandra can’t go out even if she wanted to.

10.Who starts a snowball fight?

See the previous answer. (Though it’d totally be Cassandra if she could go out.)

11. Who wants to cosy up to the fire?

Mainly Cassandra. Catch her scooping Melony up and bringing her to the nearest fireplace so they can snuggle and be warm. Most of the time, Melony has no objection to this.

12. Who looks best in a jacket?

Melony, mainly because she’s the only one who wears a jacket between the two.

13. Who wants to see the Christmas parade?

Cassandra’s probably a lot more into the idea of a Christmas parade. I think Melony would end up getting way too anxious in a crowd of people to really enjoy herself.

14. Who still believes in Santa?

Neither of them believe in Santa. Cassandra grew out of it a long time ago, and it was never really a thing in Melony’s home for her to ever believe in it in the first place. (Plus Melony finds the concept kind of creepy anyway).

15. Who throws the Christmas party?

Bold to assume these two would ever throw a Christmas party. They’d rather watch Christmas movies or something than deal with people.

16. Who picks out matching ugly sweaters?

Melony, and Cassandra really only wears it to make her happy. Much like her mom, Cassandra hates itchy/ugly Christmas sweaters.

17. Who makes homemade gifts?

Homemade stuff isn’t really their thing. The closest they get is Melony’s baking for everyone.

18. Who is the best gift giver?

Melony’s really good at getting gifts for people she knows well (Like Max, Mia, or Cass), but Cassandra’s surprisingly good at getting gifts for everybody no matter what.

19. Who wants a kiss under the mistletoe?

Melony, but she’s too shy to ask. Lucky for her Cassandra ALSO wants to kiss under the mistletoe and isn’t shy about asking at all.

20. Who wants to go caroling?

Cassandra, she actually kind of likes caroling with her sisters. Melony probably would if she wasn’t worried about sounding bad, though.

21. Who is bad at ice skating and keeps falling on their butt?

God, both of them can’t skate to save their lives. Max and Elena have both offered to try and teach Melony, but she’s yet to accept the offers.

Daximus:

1. Who makes the other hot chocolate?

They take turns surprising each other with hot chocolate. Daniela especially can’t get enough of the stuff so everytime she makes it she’ll make Max some, too. Max isn’t as big of cocoa drinker, but he knows Daniel likes it which is mainly why he makes it.

2. Who listens to Christmas music way too early?

They’re both guilty. They both LOVE Christmas music, and, along with Mia, pull out the Christmas vinyls pretty much on November 1st.

3. Who is excited for trimming the Christmas Tree?

This might be the one thing Max actually gets more excited about than Daniela. Decorating for Christmas was always his favourite thing as a kid, especially the tree. Unfortunately he doesn’t feel entirely comfortable actually expressing that in front of everybody, but he does try to help with the tree a little bit.

4. Who puts up the Christmas lights?

Max puts them up, but Daniela is the one who insists on stringing some up in the bedroom because she loves the look of them. (He tends to agree.)

5. Who wants to go see the neighborhood Christmas lights?

Daniela would love to go see the Christmas lights. In some AU where she can be outside in the winter and they lived in like… a normal town, she’d drag Max out to go see them.

6. Who bakes cookies?

Daniela tried to, because Max can’t bake for shit. Unfortunately, neither can she. They leave the baking to Mia and Melony.

7. Who wraps the presents?

They share the responsibility pretty evenly, but Max is arguably better at wrapping than Daniela is.

8. Who hits up Black Friday sales?

Max does, it’s the best time for him to buy Daniela more Squishmallows (and maybe look at some discount knives)

9. Who wants to build a snowman?

Daniela always wants to, even though she knows she can’t go outside, let alone touch snow without burning her fingers off. So Mia showed them how to make fake snow. It’s not the same thing, obviously, but Daniela can make baby snowmen out of it and she loves it all the same.

10.Who starts a snowball fight?

Either of them would, honestly, again, if snow wasn’t actually deadly to Daniela. (Doesn’t stop them from using the fake snow, though. Which totally doesn’t make a mess and get Alcina mad at them.)

11. Who wants to cosy up to the fire?

You’d think Daniela, cause of the whole “I hate cold” thing, but Max is actually the one who has to convince her to snuggle by the fire. The main reason being because Daniela has so much more energy in winter, it’s hard to get her to just sit. Half the time he has to end up laying on her just to keep her there for more than ten minutes. (She could just swarm off and leave if she wanted, but he looks so comfy and Daniela doesn’t wanna ruin that for him)

12. Who looks best in a jacket?

Max will argue Daniela does, Daniela will argue that Max does. The truth is they both look great in jackets, Max just wears them more because he actually goes outside.

13. Who wants to see the Christmas parade?

Daniela. She has no idea what it is, but she really wants to see one.

14. Who still believes in Santa?

Daniela definitely does, Max probably still would, too, if he didn’t have to start being Santa and leaving gifts for his younger siblings when he was a teenager.

15. Who throws the Christmas party?

Daniela’s probably way more of a party person than Max is, so she’d have the idea to throw one, and then get Max to help her organize it.

16. Who picks out matching ugly sweaters?

Daniela for sure. She’ll get them at the start of the month and then her and Max will wear them all the time until Christmas day. Max doesn’t mind, he actually really likes ugly Christmas sweaters.

17. Who makes homemade gifts?

Max, and he tries to make one for everybody, not just Daniela. It’s a little bit hard when he doesn’t know everyone that well aside from like 2 or 3 people, though.

18. Who is the best gift giver?

Daniela’s adamant that it’s Max. He always seems to know what to get everyone, even though he’s not really obligated to get anybody anything.

19. Who wants a kiss under the mistletoe?

Both of them, and believe me, they’re gonna do way more than kiss if they can. (Daniela’s gonna put one specifically in their room so she has an excuse to smooch Max whenever he comes in the door and vice versa)

20. Who wants to go caroling?

Oh, they’re both big into caroling. They can’t exactly go around and torment the Village with their singing, but they sure can run around the castle and bug the staff and family with non-stop “Deck the Halls” and “Jingle Bells” and “All I want For Christmas is You”.

21. Who is bad at ice skating and keeps falling on their butt?

Daniela (she’s never been skating before). Max is surprisingly okay at it, though.

Elizabeta and Donna/Angie (Platonic):

1. Who makes the other hot chocolate?

Elizabeta, even though that could be seen as part of her job almost. She makes it with love either way, and Donna does appreciate the gesture.

2. Who listens to Christmas music way too early?

Oh, Elizabeta hands down. Donna enjoys Christmas music enough, but sometimes she can hear it playing from the gardener’s house when she walks by or hear Elizabeta humming it in mid-November.

3. Who is excited for trimming the Christmas Tree?

Elizabeta, though Angie is also super excited about decorating. Which, she has to assume means Donna is somewhat excited about it, too. They have fun putting up the tree together and decorating it (Angie gets to put the star on top)

4. Who puts up the Christmas lights?

Elizabeta, again, mainly as part of her job. But also because she’s taller and Donna’s afraid of falling off a ladder.

5. Who wants to go see the neighborhood Christmas lights?

Donna really loves Christmas lights, and she’d love to go sight seeing Christmas lights if she could. She has to settle for whatever Alcina decides to put up, though. They’re pretty all the same.

6. Who bakes cookies?

Honestly, I think Donna would. I like to believe she’s fairly good at baking at least very basic cookies, and that’s good enough for them.

7. Who wraps the presents?

They wrap presents together. Neither is especially bad at it, so it mostly just becomes a light hearted fight for markers and tape. (Meanwhile, Angie’s literally stealing the supplies to go wrap her own gifts)

8. Who hits up Black Friday sales?

Elizabeta would, despite Donna telling her it’s not worth dealing with the crowds.

9. Who wants to build a snowman?

Oh, Elizabeta, and to some extent Angie. They have to convince Donna to help them make one (mainly because if she isn’t around they’re just going to fight).

10.Who starts a snowball fight?

Angie. It starts with her throwing one at Liza, and in retaliation she throws one back, somehow one ends up hitting Donna, now they’re all in on it. Until someone forfeits or gets hurt somehow.

11. Who wants to cosy up to the fire?

Probably Elizabeta, because she works outside all day, and while her place further out does have a fireplace, it’s just kind of nice to sit with her friend and drink a hot beverage by a nice big fire.

12. Who looks best in a jacket?

Donna, because Angie and Elizabeta don’t wear jackets.

13. Who wants to see the Christmas parade?

Elizabeta would want to go, but Donna would rather stay home. Liza would end up going with Max and Daniela instead.

14. Who still believes in Santa?

Both of them. Donna maybe a little more. Elizabeta likes to think he’s real even though she knows by now that he isn’t.

15. Who throws the Christmas party?

Neither of them, they’ll go to Alcina’s Christmas party for a while then go home and watch old movies or something to wind down.

16. Who picks out matching ugly sweaters?

Not necessarily matching, but Elizabeta would find her and Donna Christmas sweaters to wear. Donna isn’t the most festive person, but she’ll put it on for Christmas day/eve.

17. Who makes homemade gifts?

Donna, and much like Elena, it’s mainly clothing. (Though Angie will make little handmade things for Donna and maybe Alcina)

18. Who is the best gift giver?

Probably Elizabeta, but the bar is pretty low for the term “Best” with these three. They’re trying their best, though.

19. Who wants a kiss under the mistletoe?

Elizabeta. She won’t get one from Donna but she can get one from Max while they’re over (and maybe one from Daniela if she’s lucky)

20. Who wants to go caroling?

Elizabeta, again, but she knows Donna won’t let her. Her and Angie sure can sing and annoy the heck out of Donna, though.

21. Who is bad at ice skating and keeps falling on their butt?

Elizabeta, though Donna is very willing to try and teach her how. Girl just had bad balance, and it doesn’t help that Angie’s 100% heckling her about it from the sidelines.

Lake and Angela (Platonic):

1. Who makes the other hot chocolate?

Lake makes it at random and just sets it beside Angela without a word. Everytime. They never say anything about it. Boi just likes making their friend some nice cocoa.

2. Who listens to Christmas music way too early?

Angela actually really likes Christmas music, and will listen to it anytime throughout the year. Arguably, Christmas is Angela’s favourite holiday. Lake is way less into it, but they’re happy if Angela’s happy.

3. Who is excited for trimming the Christmas Tree?

Angela, they try to do it by themself every year, and every year Lake has to come and help because they aren’t tall enough and Lake is like a damn tree.

4. Who puts up the Christmas lights?

Ya already know it’s Lake and their tall ass.

5. Who wants to go see the neighborhood Christmas lights?

Angela, but Lake is happy to tag along. They both enjoy the lights, and they both adore those houses that have their lights timed to songs. (Angela for “Ooo pretty lights” reasons, and Lake for “Oh fuck the acid kicked in” reasons)

6. Who bakes cookies?

Probably also Angela. They really enjoy baking, and they tend to make a LOT at Christmas especially (and Lake eats 90% of it).

7. Who wraps the presents?

Mostly Angela, but Lake can do it if they don’t forget.

8. Who hits up Black Friday sales?

Both of them, despite Angela hating shopping in general, let alone on Black Friday. But cheap shit is cheap shit. At least Lake isn’t hard to find if (when) they get separated.

9. Who wants to build a snowman?

Lake, and they will sing “Do you Wanna Build a Snowman” until Angela joins them. The two of them usually end up making a small snowman army at the local park.

10.Who starts a snowball fight?

Angela, and it’s usually after Lake makes enough bad snow puns or Frozen references to start getting on their nerves. The snowball fights are always fun, though.

11. Who wants to cosy up to the fire?

Lake, usually with some cocoa, cookies, and a fat blunt. Sometimes Angela joins them, but they prefer sitting under a blanket in a nest of pillows to being near the fire.

12. Who looks best in a jacket?

They both look best in a jacket, but Lake will always joke that they look better.

13. Who wants to see the Christmas parade?

Angela, and Lake gets dragged along because they can put Ange on their shoulders if they get stuck behind people. Lake doesn’t really care for the parade as a whole, though.

14. Who still believes in Santa?

Also Angela, and Lake isn’t going to be the one to tell them otherwise. In fact they arguably keep Angela’s belief alive because they’ve started getting them one “Santa Gift”, for fun.

15. Who throws the Christmas party?

It’s more of a family get together, but Angela is always the host. And it’s always their family, Lake’s never seems to come (and they never seem to go home for the holidays ever. Angela has to admit, they aren’t sure what that’s about.)

16. Who picks out matching ugly sweaters?

Lake, because they can always find the best (worst) ugly sweaters for them to wear.

17. Who makes homemade gifts?

Angela, they’ll usually make one for Lake and one for the coworkers they really like. These gifts get mixed reviews (they once found one in the garbage. But it’s not like they think about it all the time or anything)

18. Who is the best gift giver?

Somehow, it’s Lake. Boi has some sixth sense for getting people gifts, even for birthdays.

19. Who wants a kiss under the mistletoe?

Both of them do, just not with each other. (Well… maybe once.)

20. Who wants to go caroling?

Angela, and it’s probably the one thing they don’t drag Lake out to do with them. They’ve heard Lake sing, and it’s pitchy at best. Plus they have a small group they go around with already.

21. Who is bad at ice skating and keeps falling on their butt?

I think they’re both good at ice skating. Lake is just slightly better at it than Angela.

[mydisenchantedeulogy]

Hello Sorrow [Chapter Three] Run Sweetheart Run [Karl Heisenberg]

Run and hide … run and hide …

His words stayed with her like a menacing curse.

Irina ran, but she didn’t know where to go. The room was dim; air damp, reeking of iron and musk. She ran in what seemed like circles before coming to a breathless stop, regrettably aware that she had not escaped the same hole she had plunged down. How were her thoughts so unorganized? It was because of him; it had to be, watching her from above like she was a mouse in a game of find the cheese.

Her breath came out hot and heavy as she gasped for air. Was this a panic attack? Irina looked desperately around her. She yearned for a weapon; a door out of this place. But her mind was too jumbled. She could hardly think straight.

Breathe, she begged.

She needed a moment to concentrate; a moment without Heisenberg watching her to assess the situation.

Irina took a deep and uneven breath. Her throat was tender; head beating from the tension, but she felt better.

If only for a moment.

“Time is ticking away, darling. You don’t want to die at the starting line, do you?”

Irina shot a baleful glance in his direction. “Shut up.”

His voice wasn’t helping.

Laughing at her only irritated her more.

“Best of luck,” he stated.

Before he slammed the trapdoor closed, Heisenberg grinned, staring down at her scared, yet irked expression. “And sweetheart … don’t disappoint me.”

“Go to hell!”

The door came down with a bang; dust rained down with it. Thank god he left her alone.

Shutting her sore eyes, Irina took another breath and opened them, rescanning the grimy room. There wasn’t much in terms of weapons she could use; this room was void of scrap, and she couldn’t imagine tossing a cardboard box at Heisenberg.

Skip it. What’s next?

Waiting him out was an ignorant plan. Irina had no reason to trust that he’d keep his word and let her go once the game was over. Hell no. She’d take her chances trying to escape, then worry about fleeing from the village once she returned. First, she needed to find a map and locate the exits – this was a factory; there were bound to be many. Heisenberg gave her an hour; there was plenty she could do in an hour, like secure a sturdy weapon and attempt to remove the shackles from her wrists.

“I can do this,” she uttered in assurance.

There was no way he could search every nook and cranny to find her. This factory was enormous; it certainly looked enormous from the outside.

As she was pondering her next move a low rattling noise startled her. From the left, a shutter door opened, as if to welcome her into the next room. How generous of the prick to lend her a hand.

Accepting, Irina moved into the next room. But as she passed through, a high-pitched siren went off and the shutter began to come down, sealing her within. A warning light flooded her in bright red. Irina screamed in frustration and slammed her hands against the rippled metal.

“Fuck you! This is cheating,” she snapped.

The siren hurt her ears.

“And shut that damn thing off.”

Moments later, the siren went silent, but the warning light remained on – he was a comical one.

Obviously, Heisenberg wanted her to move onward. Returning back to the previous room was not an option.

Irina turned with an irritated huff and searched the room. It looked as if it were once used as a breakroom. An herb in a small terracotta pot sat on a table top in the corner; dust covered lockers and shelves rested against the walls.

And much to her relief, she saw a door.

She stepped away from the shutter and began to rummage around in the lockers. They were bare, apart from one that possessed a long-range flashlight. The lens was horribly cracked, but the battery was still good, albeit it took her several smacks against her hand to get the light to stop flashing in and out once she tested it.

It would do.

Before she progressed on, Irina uprooted the wilted green herb and stored it in her bag. Luiza taught her that the stem, when ingested, had curative properties; it wasn’t much and she wasn’t sure she’d even need it, but having it was better than not having it.

The door led her down a set of narrow steps. Irina had to use the cold brick wall as a support, because the bright red warning lights above were on, ominously blinking. She was nervous she’d miss a step and fall on her ass. When she reached the bottom and opened the door, she stood in complete shock, having been led to the beating heart of the factory.

Her stomach twisted and churned in dread; this place was much larger than she thought.

The shrill hum of the machines vibrated in her ears as suspension conveyors moved heavy materials in sharp angles from one empty station to the next across the production floor; massive pumpjacks rotated on screeching cranks in rapid succession, hissing and shooting steam.

Tears gathered in her scared eyes. It was horrific; the worst sound Irina had ever heard, like a howling mechanical beast.

I’m going to die here.

Absolutely not. She was going to beat this game.

Irina eased towards the broken railing and looked down. There was another floor beneath the one she was on; the smell of murky stagnant water below made her pucker her nose in disgust. How far did she go down?

She decided not to dwell on it long and continued across the platform to the end where the floor branched into three areas; two were sealed by doors and the other was an open lift. Her heart hammered in excitement, and to improve her mood, she saw an extensive map of the factory on the wall near the door in front of her.

Irina hurried into the lift, finding the worn service panel. B4 was lit up; a glowing circle beside it. She wondered if B4 was the floor she was on, considering the fact B5 was written on the last button.

“Please let this work,” she uttered.

Her life depended on it.

But first, the map – in case she was wrong – then perhaps she could find a way to break the shackles around her wrists.

According to the diagram she was in Materials. To leave she had to make her way up to Storage; seemed easy enough.

Irina grinned and went through the door across from the lift cart. Her keen eyes caught sight of something against the wall. It was a model of the factory – though not exact – with rotating mechanisms. Did Heisenberg make this? It was rather crafted.

She watched in wonder as the golden trolley car moved back and forth on its automated track. Reaching out to touch it, she noticed the base on which it sat was a barred ossuary that held the crystallized remains of a human inside it. Haunting, yet beautiful, Irina wondered if it were valuable.

Perhaps she’d take it and see if the Duke might buy it from her. But how would she free it? There appeared to be no button or padlock on the ossuary; nothing but a dented space made for something round.

As she was searching for other methods to open the casket, she heard a strange noise over the whisper of the machines outside. The sound was almost familiar, yet she knew she had never heard it here before. In the village maybe; a cart.

It suddenly occurred to her what it might be. Irina darted back onto the platform just in time for the cart to disappear from the floor she was on. In horror, she watched as the buttons on the outside lit up to indicate the floor the cart was being called to. At Storage it stopped, then a second later it began to descend again, passing up floors 2 and 3.

Is it time?

No damn way had an hour passed. Heisenberg was cheating.

He led me here. The entire time he knew which floor I was on, because he fucking led me here.

He lied to her; he never intended to play fair. And she was a fool to trust him.

Irina ran. She busted through the remaining door in a panic and rushed down the steps, fleeing down a hallway bathed in red. At the end of the hall, she found herself in another room. An automated door sat in front of her, red light on the hull. But once Irina tried to wrench it open, she learned that it was locked.

Why wouldn’t it move?

“Open … please open.”

She tried all she knew to do, but the door remained shut. Tears stung her eyes as she banged weakly on the metal. The palm of her hand struck the bulbous red light and a final last idea came to her. Perhaps if she broke it the door would short circuit and open. It was worth a shot.

On a mantel piece to the right of her, she found a rusted hammer. The splintered wood dug into her tender skin as Irina yanked it from its hook. Standing back, her arm extended and she swung at the light, hitting it dead center. The lens fissured, webbing out, and with one more potent hit, the glass broke, spraying sparks and hissing in protest before the metal latch gave and the door opened.

“Could have been an easier way to do that then breaking my damn door,” a voice said.

Irina jerked in fear and glanced over her shoulder. Heisenberg stood behind her, duster and hat missing from his person. But over his arm he carried a large sledge hammer; its handle was wooden, but its massive head was made of fused helical gears and metal scrap. How was he able to carry such a thing?

“Shame,” he added. “You only held out for about ten minutes.”

She gave him a heated glare. “The hour you gave me isn’t over yet. There is still time.”

“Afraid not. Your time is up.”

His hammer smacked the floor with a deafening crack; its metal face scraped the concrete, shattering it.

Irina tossed the claw hammer at him and ran – whether it hit its mark or not wasn’t her concern.

“That’s the spirit,” he taunted.

She scurried up sets of stairs; across steel grate platforms and down dark halls with nothing but her light to lead the way, until her legs ached and her breath poured out thick and hot.

It hurts, she complained.

At last, she stopped, coming to rest in a heated workroom with an x-ray film board and a furnace used to make castings.

Was there anywhere safe to catch her breath?

Irina sighed and moved around to the other side of a workbench to a door on her right. It was bolted, but with a lock pick she opened it and wondered in, locking it from the inside.

Sitting on the floor, she took an uneasy breath.

She had to rest.

Just a moment.

But something slumped to the floor near her, moving in the dark. Irina shined her light on the area and to her horror, a monster stood. It’s arm, wired to an auger roared to life.    

Irina screamed.

[crowtrobotx]

Karl Heisenberg for the headcanon thing, of course! Pretty please. :)

My love. My dear. OF COURSE YOU CAN HAVE HEIS CONTENT. This man still has me in a fucking headlock and I suspect always will.

Headcanon A:  realistic

This man has never had a partner. Whether you choose to also believe he’s a virgin is totally up to you (all aboard the sexually inexperienced Karl train) but I refuse to believe with the amount of hatred he has toward the villagers and the fact that people don’t really see him outside his factory that he’s very experienced, if at all. His “family” situation hasn’t allowed him to learn to trust or see the good side of relationships so he’s going to be VERY wary of anyone who wants to love him romantically or platonically - but I think deep down it’s what he really wants and needs. Imagine what might have happened if he had someone, friend or partner, to keep him grounded to his humanity. 🥺

The only way I would see differently is if it becomes canon that he was taken as an adult (ie he left a partner behind or had a normal life prior) or if we assume that he’s been here his whole life and had a wild period in his youth before he snapped out of it. But I really do think at best it’s been ages since he had a friendship let alone a romance and I reject frat boy Heis headcanons. (That’s not to say you don’t create a monster once you’re in a relationship tho 😉)

Headcanon B: while it may not be realistic it is hilarious

I really feel like Heis is “the dad and the pet he said he didn’t want” as far as cats/dogs/etc go. Like if a stray cat or dog wanders into the factory or you want to keep an animal he will bitch and whine forever but you will constantly catch him asleep in his busted recliner with the pet on his lap, both snoring away. I also don’t think he has a preference between cats and dogs or whatever - he’s so used to working with cold, hard, metal machines that anything Warm and Fuzzy is going to make him incredibly soft.

Headcanon C: heart-crushing and awful, but fun to inflict on friends

There is a 100% chance if you are this man’s S/O that he will make a deliberate attempt to chase you off at least once. I feel strongly that he’d be the type to initially be delighted and overwhelmed at a romantic relationship but at some point soon after he’s going to realize he’s let someone in way too close, where they can hurt him the most, and he’s going to say and potential do something awful to get you to leave. There’s also gonna be some self-loathing and belief that he doesn’t deserve you sprinkled in there. He cannot break up with you himself because he LOVES you so much and it terrifies him, so if he can get you to go of your own free will he will have an easier time dealing with it (or so he thinks.) If YOU leave HIM then he can hate you, right?

Headcanon D: unrealistic, but I will disregard canon about it because I reject canon reality and substitute my own.

His clothing color palette is extremely earth toned and…. Frankly boring in game, but I think that was largely so he wouldn’t draw attention to himself. (Same deal with the hat/glasses.)

Outside of the Village or in an AU? HAWAIIAN SHIRTS (always unbuttoned, tum on display.) MULTICOLORED SOCKS AND SANDALS. WAY MORE HATS THAN ONE PERSON COULD EVER WEAR. NOVELTY TEES. Absolutely outrageous Grill/Garage Dad Aesthetic.

Also: Heelys. You know he has a pair. He is a menace.

[lovelywingsart]

Is Emelia’s mutant form physically taxing to her? Like is she super hungry after using it?

Also could we have some cadou headcannons for your universe?

Ohhh, I like these... ouo And I like talking, so here we go!! Fair warning, this is HELLA long because of that second one, so there's gonna be a cut here! QuQ

I wouldn't exactly say it's physically taxing as in making her hungry like my werewolves, but it is VERY physically taxing as in exhausting her to the point of passing out if she's not prepared physically and mentally. Since the first mutation, she learned incredibly quickly that both mutating to and from her full form took enough energy to put her down for a few days both physically and mentally. (and it absolutely did, she slept ALOT the first few times when getting used to it, and her speech/coherent thought wasn't exactly up to par when /attempting to/ communicate with Karl. The speech came pretty easy soon after though, thankfully, even if it does tear up her throat.)

The mutation itself severely heightens her senses, thus using alot more mental power than she typically relies on, plus it's her actual muscle and bone being forced through the skin, so it's absolute hell on her body. Eating food does kinda help for physical energy in general, but only to a point since, again, it's not hunger based. Instead, it takes a specific type of concentration towards her physical being in order to curb that exhaustion enough to not make it an absolute nightmare to deal with. Like... think meditation, but putting that concentration on a parasite in your chest AND calming yourself instead of just simply clearing your mind. It's difficult, but it works! ^^ //Her worst mistake is mutating on a dime without at least putting a little mental power towards it, a good example being the fight with Ethan.//

Ah, that's one I've simultaneously put quite a bit of and not much thought into. QuQ Here's what I have, though!~ :D (Like I said, this is LONG. I don't have much, but there's alot of thought into each one!!)

-> Depending on the individual, a Cadou can react through simple/strong emotion. While emotional reactions do vary, it doesn't seem to be something that happens to everyone- Emelia herself is an example, but I also headcannon both Heisenberg and Beneviento to have this emotional 'connection' with their Cadou! Through my own stories you can see how Karl's effects his surroundings depending on his mood; angry means violent power bursts with occasional lighter blue electric fields depending on the AMOUNT of anger, calm means lazy movements(like dancing), and neutral/controlled generally means... well, everything we've seen in game; Controlled and calculated movements. As for Donna, I think the severity of the hallucinations from the flowers and Cadou HEAVILY depend on her emotions. More tame/easy visions equate to a calmer Donna, while more horrific visions are a result of high negative emotions from her- like fear. Angie is kind of a result of this as well since she's technically part of her Cadou, with the doll being loud and cheery while Donna is calm, yet 'calm' and menacing while Donna is scared.

-> Thanks to her creating the parasites in the first place, Miranda has control of them(the Cadou AND the Lords)- no matter if they're physically around her or not. I've touched on this a bit in The Summoning, but case in point is; With her 'control' over the mold, Miranda is capable of controlling the very parasites she created with it, meaning a sort of 'communication' between herself and any individual with one. Need to alert them of her presence? Call them to her? Organize a Lycan attack? Cause our favorite metal man unnecessary pain? She can do it. She can silence a 'fight' with a wave of her hand. She can communicate her desires with a glance. She can physically direct them where to go with a simple thought. If you have a Cadou, she can use you. It's her way of maintaining control, and a HUGE reason why Karl waited so long to set his plans in motion. (other than her being crazy strong, but the Cadous is a factor in that, too)

-> A simple one- individuals can feel their Cadou in whatever part of the body it's in, and some physical reactions will mirror/be affected that movement. Emelia, the Lords, and Lycans alike. No matter who you are, you can feel the little fucker. It's another thing I've touched on, like all of these, but it's also the one I feel would absolutely be possible in-game. Have some mini individual HCs for this one!

* The Lycans don't react to the movement of the parasites(if any; that HC is coming up) because they're basically glorified zombies. They don't care about what they feel, they just want to kill and eat. The Cadou are generally in pretty random place in the abdominal/stomach area, if not in their stomachs themselves, and sometimes the brain; thus leading to their constant hunger and pack-mentality.

* Emelias is in her chest, primarily attached to her heart/sternum(i.e. muscle and bone). Feeling it move is like squirming along her chest, and will cause hesitant movement and sometimes loss of breath, or a lightheaded feeling if it constricts a little too much due to emotions and heart rate. She makes careful decisions instead of rash ones since the constriction/movement will increase depending on adrenaline levels and brain activity- and it's not good to work or fight when you can't stand straight and are weak from lack of blood oxygen.

* Karls is in the mid-abdominal area close to his spine, with tendrils that coil up the spine and to his lungs from 'bonding'. Because of this, movement of the parasite WILL make him physically slow down, and is the reason why he tends to walk with a wider gate. When Miranda plays her games, it's why he collapses almost immediately, the parasite temporarily 'paralyzing' him and making it difficult to breathe from squeezing the spinal cord and lungs. He finds general movement annoying and will often compare it to an itchy cramping feeling. Sometimes he will trip over his own feet when in heavy distress, but he generally avoids that by instead using his power, forcing the Cadou to do something 'productive' rather than cause him pain.

* Salvatore, as we actually know from the concept art in-game, has his located between his shoulders and right below his neck. Due to the uncontrolled mutation normally, he doesn't 'feel' the Cadou per-say, but he absolutely knows when it moves. It feels like squirming worms to him, and considering his form before he mutates, it looks like it too. He thinks it's kinda itchy when it moves too, but also kinda makes his back burn a bit... His twitchy movements and swaying steps help relieve the feeling quite a bit, and he almost always does so since, again, he can't control it.

* Donnas is actually rather small and located in the scar on her eye/partially in the brain, hence the ability it possesses. However, since she's split it among MULTIPLE beings, primarily Angie, she just barely feels the movement. It comes to her as an odd itch or a dull headache, but she can also tell via her dolls movements. The Cadou makes the wooden terrors twitch and shake, hence their initial movements in-game while looking for Angie. Donnas fear is the key factor in the movements, with the Cadou sensing her distress and reacting almost violently to it. Honestly, she notices the dolls move before she feels it, herself.

*Alcinas is also located in the mid-abdominal region with smaller tendrils along her torso from age, though hers is closer to the front, around the diaphragm and lungs. The movement for her causes minor difficulty breathing and alterations to her voice, and it feels similar to Emelias when it does move- a really odd squirming in the area where it's located. It doesn't exactly hinder her movements all that much, but she will pause every now and then if it moves when she does. She moreso finds it annoying than anything, but the feeling is outweighed by her personal focus on her abilities.

* The Daughters(Bela, Cassandra, Daniela) all technically have the Cadou in their chests, though do to the fact that they're made of flies, they can't exactly feel the parasites since they're kinda distributed among the insects. They might shimmer or visibly vibrate a bit if anything does happen, but other than that they are the ones who feel it the least.

-> The placement of the Cadou determines the crystal variants among those who fused 'perfectly' with them. Not including the Lycans(also Urias and the Varcolacs), who weren't exactly 'perfect' with the Cadou, the crystalized forms of those who have bonded enough to be coherent heavily depend on where the Cadou has been located; Emelias Crystal was the Cadou with the heart, Alcinas Crystal was the torso, Moreaus Crystal was that of a blob(from the extra cells), Heisenbergs Crystal was simply the upright parasite with tendrils(I say because it was along the spine), the Daughters Crystals were smaller torsos, and Donna had NO Crystal because hers was scattered in her dolls, so Angie was taken instead.

-> The Cadou parasite itself can be 'dead'(or underveloped) while the individual still 'lives'; thus being my explanation for the Lycans. I think the Cadou for the Lycans were the ones that didn't survive, hence the creatures looks and actions.(Told you I'd get to it!) Granted, the implantation of the Cadou still changed them while the parasites were still alive for the short time, but while the Lycans 'survived', their Cadou did not. Or, not for all of them, at least- The Varcolac Alfa, Urias, and Urias Strajer DO have surviving Cadou, thus making them stronger and the 'main bosses' of their respective groups. That's not to say that a dead Cadou means a mutated creature, however- we just haven't quite seen it. I believe there is a slim possibility of someone surviving AND having a 'dead' or underdeveloped parasite; but I do mean a VERY SLIM possibility.

-> Regarding the Soldats since they also have the parasites, I think their Cadou are stuck in an almost vegetative state due to Karls experiments and mechanical additions to the creatures themselves. I don't believe they are technically considered alive OR dead- It's like a physical form of purgatory, being the result of adding a live organism into a dead one. They don't have the capability to work as a single 'organized' unit like the Lycans, though they very obviously aren't braindead enough to not function at all. The Soldats are kinda in an odd grey area of being alive and dead, with Karls mechanical additions and circuiting being the primary driving force. The Cadou don't grant them extra life or strength like the Lycans, nor do the parasites give extra mutation or abilities. The Cadou exist in the creatures as mere hearts and motors, with the rest being added by Heisenberg, himself.

-> Odd, fun tidbit, not at all as serious; having a Cadou means you generally don't need to do what normal people do- eat or drink. They don't HAVE to eat. The parasite provides enough energy for them to not need to do so. But, of course, they do anyway! Alcina could potentially be the 'exception' to this, but that's because of her pre-existing condition that was worsened by the Cadou implantation, and she only really needs blood anyway. But she enjoys a nice fancy meal, Karl enjoys sweets and the occasional drink, Emelia highly enjoys meats(primarily steak or ham) and sweet/salty foods, Salvatore likes cheeses, and Donna loves the daily tea and occasional sweets <3

-> (Little heads up for this one, I'm not sure if this HC will actually be upsetting or not...!) In relation to the last one, getting implanted with a Cadou while having a pre-existing condition beforehand will ABSOLUTELY affect the outcome of the mutation, which can explain a very specific being. This one was actually suggested by a very good friend of mine while talking, and I have absolutely adopted it as a headcanon. Like mentioned above, Alcina had a pre-existing blood disease before the parasite, resulting in the necessity of consuming blood in order for her mutation to not lose absolute control. But the other major factor in this HC?

Moreau.

We've seen lovely fish man and his full glory... But there HAS to be a reason why he mutated so horribly. The reason?

Cancerous cells before the parasite.

Cancer cells, as we know, are cells that just keep dividing and adding onto themselves despite the body not at all needing them, causing tumors and whatnot. Moreau has VERY obviously been the unfortunate soul who had the most odd, disturbing, and very severe mutation after receiving the Cadou, causing his cells to grow even more continuously than normal. I believe he had this type of issue BEFORE he was taken, that issue being some sort of cancer. Now, what KIND isn't really clear, and doesn't exactly matter in the long run, because the result of the Cadou mixing with those already growing cells created the mass. Like Alcina with her blood condition turning into a need to consume it, Salvatores cancer before mutation severely impacted his 'bond' to the Cadou and resulted in what we know today.

-> The mixture of two Cadou abilities in, say, a child, will result in a more potent form of said abilities. Yes, this is one specifically regarding my own little AU Heisenberg spawn, Adalwulf, but also Rose, and will absolutely be implemented in other ways. Granted, the two Cadou in question are incredibly powerful anyway- One may not receive both abilities, but there is an incredible chance of any ability they are born with being much stronger than one or both parents if taught to control it. Now, the Cadou itself won't entirely be passed down, so this COULD be ignored entirely, but think of it like Ethan and the expectations of Rose. Rose is the product of a strong Megamycete connection, which is exactly what the Cadou are. Ethan, Miranda, the Lords and Emelia are all the same, meaning Adalwulf and Rose are ALSO the same- incredibly strong beings with super capabilities due to being results of secondary Mold spread. And while we don't know yet how Rose was trained and exactly what she can do, Ada was specifically coached by his father and honed his abilities early on, resulting in him being the sole reason why Karl survived. Two Cadou, or simply a full Mold being, producing a child is like scientists producing a bio-weapon highly capable of destroying SO much. The mixture of the two is, simply, highly dangerous due to potency if not handled correctly.

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And... That's all I have for right now! :D Like I said, not very many, BUT I tend to put a fuck ton of thought into certain things. And when it comes to headcanons or informational tidbits of worlds/stories I work with, you can bet it's always alot!

I hope these answered your questions decently!! QuQ Thank you so much for the ask! <3

[indigopearl96]

I have a few ideas on what happens if Moira got trapped in the REVillage. One idea is that Moira is found in the reservoir by Moreau, immediately being kidnapped and being given the Cadou so Moreau can finally gain Mother Miranda's love. Moira is a successful bond in all the ideas but is slightly different. Her general abilities are a combination of herself and Gabriel with the transformation varying. When found by Moreau, she becomes a large somewhat deformed salamander like beast with four arms, vomiting blood, and is poisonous. This only happens when threatened, angered, or forced to.

Another idea is that she falls onto a tree with a hanging doll while Donna is trying to have a nice stroll through her property. She panics at first before Angie points out that Moira was unconscious because of the fall. Donna reluctantly helps Moira and treats her wounds with Angie trying to figure out how to use her technology. Moira and Donna end up being absolutely silent towards each other and take a while to warm up to each other while Angie is a menace and reminds the scientist of Sombra. They bond when Moira breaks down because she's gone through some shit. She was graduating/going to college when the Omnic Crisis happened if my math is correct sooooo, that's a lot of trauma- The way Moira is given the Cadou is Mother Miranda finding Moira and doing it herself, making her transformation a larger and much more dangerous mix of Reaper's Wraith and Moira's biotic grasp. When transformed, she can stab people and drain them of their life, healing herself and making her temporarily stronger. She can't move through walls but is capable of going through small gaps that only mice can fit. Again, this only comes out when threatened, anger or forced.

Third is the most interesting to me because Moira ends up running to Alcina's Castle for shelter and actually avoids her daughters for a bit before being caught by the countess herself. She's given the Cadou after Alcina learns of her technology and her abilities to see if she will take to it. She does but makes several escape attempts before breaking down after she is muzzled and sees herself in a mirror that she can't recognize herself and all she has left of before being trapped is her technology. Alcina backs off the experiments a little but she's mostly focused on pleasing Mother Miranda. Her transformation is a large centipede wolf like mix with large wings and the need for human blood and flesh to stay in her other form.

That's kinda all I have for now but I do have slightly different ideas regarding those three main ideas. And no, she's not being captured by Heisenberg, she'll always land somewhere that's too far away from the factory for her to safely get there and I'm lazy

I'm not sure why, but I can't help but think of a crossover AU where Sigma accidentally opens interdimensional portals trying to experiment and because they didn't expect it, Moira ends up getting trapped in a completely different universe, not an AU of Overwatch but an entirely separate game or show such as Security Breach, thankfully she has her tech so she can heal and defend herself somewhat. She might have a pistol because of trauma and previous attacks during the Omnic Crisis, but she's basically her default skin since he asked for help after she got back from a mission. I'm somewhat conflicted as to what separate world she'd end up trapped in but some I've thought ware Resident Evil Village, Security Breach or just FNAF in general, Arcane, etc.

[queen--kenobi]

Me? A tease? Never

Fem!Heisenberg x f!reader under the cut bc Karla is bi I don't make the rules. NSFT

First of all, Karla is a goddamn pussy eating champ I just know it. Worst of all she fucking knows it too

Likes you sitting on her face. She can get her tongue deep in you. Make no mistake, she's still very much in control here. She keeps you so you can't squirm away at all

She's also a fucking Menace and will keep eye contact with you as she tongue fucks you

Feeling her laugh as you met her eyes while she's doing that? Oh my God

If you introduce her to the concept of a tongue piercing she will figure out a way to make it happen

Hnnnggghhh imagine she's got her tongue inside you before she pulls away long enough to tell you to hold on. When she slips her tongue back inside you, you feel something metal on the tip of her tongue. She presses it against your G spot and you see stars

Also likes it when you're on your back bc she can hold your thighs out to the side that way, laughing when you try to clamp them around her head

Pull her hair please she loves it

On the topic of piercings you know she'd have nipple and clit piercings

Would think you'd look good with them but she isn't going to make you get them

A tits and leg girl through and through

If you have sensitive nipples, she won't stop playing with them until you cum from that

Also wants to use nipple clamps on you if you're into that

Loves marking you up especially your breasts they will be covered in hickies

Also. She's Bitey you know I'm right

Okay, her strap game...

Holy shit she's good

Probably makes a custom one for you so she can hit every spot. Also makes one for you to use on her based on what it'd look like if you had a dick tbh

Will make you suck her strap off. Really loves it if you wear lipstick and do it

Likes bending you over her work bench and fucking you like that

Dirty talker extraordinaire. She loves to whisper in your ear just how she's going to fuck you or how good you feel and taste and smell

Big tease too she can't help it

Oh GOD especially when she cleans up because she knows she looks good. Will be a relentless tease

Since I HC her as bi sometimes if she sees you checking out a guy she'll tease you about bringing in a third. Sometimes she means it other times she doesn't

Loves it when you eat her out especially if you finagle it so you're on your knees it makes her go wild

Sometimes she wants to be fucked... absolutely turns into a brat when you give her the strap

"Come on, you can fuck me harder than that!"

If you act like you're gonna be mean and then be sweet she's fucking putty in your hands. You can tell because she gets this look on her face before becoming pliant

She likes slow and soft sex more than she let's on. She can't do it so you gotta be the one to initiate it

Makes the prettiest whimpers and bitten off moans. Likes to rake her nails down your back

I'm sure I'll think of more...

Anyway. Anyone want to hear my thots about gender bent Heisenberg?