#about the people he thought he could trust... and especially the one he thought loved him most (narcissa) --
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TELEPATÍA (Bruce wayne !)



request: I own hc about the reader falling madly in love with Batman, and he also do but the problem is that she's not interested in Bruce Wayne more to not like him especially for his playboy persona.
summary: Bruce Wayne seems a little determined to win you over at each of the galas you share and that exasperates you, but you don't know that you are deeply in love with his secret version.
a/n: idk what I just write
pairing; Bruce wayne x hero! fem reader.
open request — batman masterlist

The first time you met Bruce was at one of the galas that the Gotham City elite had put on, and being part of it you were practically obliged to go if you didn't want to break business ties with some of them, and it was there where you met Bruce Wayne.
I mean, personally, cause who didn't know Bruce Wayne? The orphaned boy turned billionaire. The heir to one of Gotham's largest fortunes. The missing man who returned to live his life between parties, scandals, and magazine covers. They'd mentioned him to you before. "I'm sure you'll love him, he's so charming," "He has a magnetic presence," "He's fascinated by intelligent women..." But when you saw him in front of you, you only thought one thing: "How disgusting."
He arrived late, with that arrogant smile and that "the world belongs to me" air. The murmurs followed him like a shadow. He approached you with a drink in his hand, his tuxedo perfectly tailored, and a confidence that bordered on insolence.
"I didn't know Gotham's business included such interesting and beautiful women. Have we met?" he said, as if you were already exhausted.
You held his gaze without smiling. "If we'd met, believe me, you'd remember." And without further ado, you walked softly out of his sight, leaving him with the words on his lips.
From that moment on, you knew he was going to be a problem. Men have a hard time with acceptance, and he was no exception. Bruce Wayne wasn't used to being rejected. And you weren't a woman with much patience for people like him.
What you didn't know back then was that that arrogance hid someone much more like you than you cared to admit. The man who patrolled the city every night with you. The man you knew as Batman.
To you, Bruce Wayne is a symbol of frivolity and superficiality: parties, women, fake smiles. You believe there's nothing real about him; he was truly an idiot if he thought he could win you over even a little with Batman waiting for you every night.
So every time Bruce Wayne tries to flirt with you, it only makes you want to leave even more. Because if he knew who you share your early mornings with… If he knew who you truly give your time and trust to… You find it pathetic. You even feel a little sorry for him. cause there's nothing Bruce Wayne can give you that Batman hasn't already shown you…
The first time you met Batman was on one of Gotham's many dark nights. You had received information about an illegal shipment of experimental weapons arriving at the port.
You infiltrated alone. Silently. Precisely. Until everything went wrong. An ambush. Bigger bodies, more heavily armed. You were good, very good, but not immortal. When you thought it was the end, a shadow fell between you and the gunfire. Silence. Sharp blows. One movement after another. And when you were able to stand again, he was there: Dark. Tall. Utterly imposing.
"You shouldn't be here." His voice was deep, as if the city were speaking through him.
"Don't tell me what to do," you spat at him, furious that he hadn't anticipated the ambush.
Batman, your beloved Batman, a respectful, chivalrous, caring, protective man, should you follow the list? It had fascinated you from the very beginning.
You didn't know exactly when it started. Maybe it was the night he covered you with his cape when you were shivering from the cold on top of a building. Or the time he wordlessly left a clean bandage beside you after a fight. Or when, after a particularly tough mission, he just sat with you, staring out at the lights of Gotham, without saying a word.
Not knowing each other's true identities was a real mess, but you liked staying that way. There was a certain seduction game going on, and they enjoyed it that way, even though you could only see each other at night.
And when you joined the Justice League it was even cooler, you were able to meet people with the same ideals and ideas for a better world, and you could spend more time with your mysterious lover.
When you joined the Justice League, the rules were clear: No one knew anyone's civilian identities. No real names, no addresses, no pasts. It was for safety, but also out of respect. They were a team, not a family.
Well, that didn't really happen like that, maybe no one knew their real names or their faces, but it was inevitable not to create some kind of friendship, once after a gala night you returned to the watchtower and met some of the members of the league, including Batman, and you began to tell them the situation and your feelings for that man who was stalking you at the galas.
"I'm fed up," you said, slumping into one of the armchairs.
Wonder Woman raised an eyebrow, amused. "What happened to you this time, huh?"
"Bruce Wayne." You sighed, rolling your eyes. "That guy shows up at every gala, like he owns the city... which he does. But he's so... insufferable. He follows me around, smiles at me like he knows me. What does he think? That I'm going to fall for an expensive suit and a perfect smile?"
Superman laughed. "Why don't you give it a try? Maybe it won't be so bad."
"Four words Superman, he.is.a.Playboy."
And Batman sitting next to you just remained silent, as was usual when the league members were there, he had to maintain his serious image.
Everyone talked about their lives, but they had never talked about who they were, and perhaps they never knew, well... almost no one knew.
It was during an emergency meeting. A mistake on a mission nearly cost one of the members their life. And when Batman opened the information he'd stored, it revealed everything he knew: their names, their revealed faces, their abilities and weaknesses—enough information to destroy each member of the team.
That broke the League. The atmosphere in the room remained tense. The betrayal. Everyone looked at him. Some with anger. Others with disappointment, and you could only stand there with your heart in your hand. You had trusted him even without knowing who he was. Why had he done that?
And you... you could only stand there with your heart in your hand. You had trusted him. Batman. Without knowing his face, his name, his life outside the suit. You had trusted him more than anyone. You had fallen in love. And now... you knew he had spied on you, watched you, recorded you as if you were a threat.
"Why?" was all you could ask. Not as a hero. Not as a member of the League. But as someone who had just lost something too deep.
The silence was brutal. No one interrupted you. No one stood up for him. You didn't know if it was more the pain of betrayal... Or the pang in your chest that came with the certainty: he'd known who you were all along.
"I needed something safe. Something that could stop them if ever… if something bad happened." His voice was low but firm. "Someone has to think the worst, even if no one wants to. And if that means them hating me… I'm fine with that."
And without waiting for anything, he ran his hands through his hood and threw it to the ground before looking up, allowing the entire team to see his face.
You really saw him, you couldn't believe it. Bruce Wayne. The insufferable idiot at the galas. The one you thought could never understand you. The one who made you roll your eyes with every arrogant smirk...
One by one, the League members began to leave. He gave Bruce a look filled with unspoken words, and then simply nodded, as if that battle wasn't going to be fought there. And so, there was silence. Just him and you.
The silence between you grew even thicker. He took a step toward you, carefully, as if everything could still shatter with a single movement. You looked at him, at Bruce, at Batman. And it all felt too real.
"Do you know what hurts the most?" you said, your voice barely trembling. "That it was you all this time. That I looked you in the eyes, that we argued at those damn galas, that I told you things and you just stayed silent."
Before he could respond, you hit him. A sharp slap, not hateful, but with the full weight of frustration and pent-up betrayal. He didn't even flinch. He just nodded, his eyes lowered.
"I deserve it" he muttered.
"Of course you deserve it!" you responded angrily, but it was no longer pure anger... just that knot in your chest that unraveled into the words, "You made me fall in love with a version of you, and they were the same."
And then it happened. You grabbed him by the collar, pulled him close, and kissed him.
It was wild. Intense. Almost a declaration of war. And he responded as if he'd been waiting for this moment forever. Not like Batman. Like Bruce Wayne, like the man who loved you.
When they broke apart, they were so close they could feel each other's breath. And you smiled faintly. "I hate you a little."
"I can live with that," he said, with an awkward but genuine smile.

#bruce wayne imagine#imagine bruce wayne#dc masterlist#bruce wayne masterlist#bruce wayne headcanon#bruce wayne angst#bruce wayne fluff#batman x reader#batman x fem reader#bruce wayne x reader
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#guys can I be real for a sec#was texting my friend today and I casually mentioned I had probably developed a peach allergy#which is so depressing because I love peaches#but luckily I seemed to only be allergic to the fuzz on the outside#and my friend texted me 'I'll peel them for you'#and I think I died a thousand deaths at that#I told him that was one of the sweetest thing someone had ever told me and not to mind if I was getting emotional#and like it was chill after that we were havin a conversation on a completely different topic#but I don't think my friend really got how show-stopping jaw-dropping what he said to me was#and he's a chill guy so again I did tell him that was incredibly sweet because it's true and then we moved on#but I feel like I still need to scream at him in the face because my poor beating heart who is not casual at all about friendships#is going mad#these days especially I am rethinking a lot about my friendships and in general baout my human relationships#saw a friend I didn't see in a while a couple of days ago on a better night that I could have hoped for#spent yesterday night thinking about the words another friend told me#and now this guy it has relatively recently hit me how close we have grown. Like I recently realized I misremembered our relationship#and that we have been closer than I thought for longer than I thought#and today he hit me with this and he's chill but I am not and I kinda wanna send him that fucking post 'would you peel an orange for me'#I've had squishes more intense than your favourite romance books#I need to be hospitalised now because people care about me and like me and trust me. By people I mean my friends. Who'd have thought.
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🎤 🎤 🎤
a song that i associate with my muse meme!
AHH, hey, ramone!! thank you for sending in this prompt :D since you sent in three of the mic's, i shall now be treating you to three songs that make me think of blamore when i hear them / that i associate with it. an explanation of why i chose them will be in the tags <3
hozier - who we are.
youtube
icehouse - crazy.
youtube
depeche mode - personal jesus.
youtube
#IT WAS PROBABLY NOTHING BUT IT FELT LIKE THE WORLD: musings.#asks - answered.#ooc post.#okay but ESPECIALLY heavy on the last one because it literally all about the idea of someone that people can turn to in hard times-#like a god or a prophet who will listen to your plights and help you + who you should believe in. and i say this because one major theme-#to blamore's character is the concept of being a false prophet and someone who essentially unfortunately takes advantage of people's-#longing for things to get better in gotham. bc i feel like a lot of people there have either been failed by the system by other's or-#possibly both and this is so that blamore can get people to voluntarily want to consume the 'seeds' it distributes in order to uhh...#well purge gotham of its undesirables basically as terrible as that sounds. but yeah that depeche mode song? it's such a good one for-#him and definitely has helped me before to write things related to him since blamore does sometimes believe in its own hubris.#but as for the second one by icehouse that one i associate with it because although it doesn't exactly consider itself to fully identify-#with the label of being a 'man' i feel as if blamore will still talk about itself that way sometimes. its relationship with its gender-#is honestly a little bit complicated NGL because him using it/its pronouns as well is something blamore adopted recently even-#though he'd always sort of felt like disconnected and/or like it didn't really align with how he saw himself completely. BUT yeahhh#i honestly could start a whole discussion about that but i shall do that another time perhaps ahah. anyhow though besides that-#elephant in the room ever since it has transformed into this half-human half-plant monster being... although it does love any partners-#it has very much (trust me) i feel like it does wonder why they chose to be with him more often than he'd like to admit.#so that's where the whole 'crazy' part comes in and as for the hozier song that song is about how you kind of have to carve through-#this 'darkness' to rediscover ourselves and who we want to be as a result of going through a rough time or just something tough in-#general and that is SO freaking fitting in my opinion for blamore because it definitely had to completely reframe the way it thought-#about itself when it transformed. and he also had to figure out what he believed in / what his values were now which can be suchhh-#a messy process TBH but this isn't the first time that blamore's had to rediscover itself as life is honestly kind of this ongoing-#process of losing yourself and trying to find yourself again you know? but yeah. i hope you enjoyed my explanation here tehe <3#and also that you enjoy the tunes!!
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#hmmm#i have Thoughts about eddie and his storylines lately#because while certain people loooove to pretend that buck is still on the hamster wheel (the showrunner and the actor disagree with you+#move on) eddie is really the one stuck in there at this point#like the shannon stuff was very evident of that#as interesting as it is to have to deal with christopher being big mad at him and leaving him alone for a while to deal with his shit#bringing back the shannon stuff around and sort of writing his love life into a corner was not the best way to go about it!#and yeah making it very evident that not only is eddie very much still hung up on shannon but that he consider her the love of his life+#is writing him into a corner!#like how could he possibly have a satisfying long term relationship or endgame when we know this??#like this is the sort of thing you do either right before you end the show or write the character off#which brings me to my next thought…#maybe it’s time they do exactly that…?#especially if chris won’t be around much or at all after this#they seemingly have no idea what to do with eddie anymore#which is a shame because he’s a great character and his s5 arc is some of the best character work this show has ever done#but like… where do we go from here?#if another love interest is brought in for eddie how are we sure the shannon of it all won’t just ruin it again?#how can we really trust that eddie truly has moved on and is ready for something again#when they clearly tried to convey that in s6 and then just took it all back in s7 lol#idk eddie is in a pretty tough spot to do anything with now#so idk maybe it’s time#they clearly aren’t going to do the queer arc so many in this fandom want so lol#idk just been thinking about some things and i have nod clue what they want to do with eddie’s character anymore#and frankly i don’t think they know either#which is a very dangerous place to be#anyway
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(Poly 141 x fem reader)
You had always been their sweetheart.
Soft, tender, and gentle- the heart of their home. The warmth in the spaces between them, the one they curled around after long days of violence, soothed by your touch and your voice, the way you cared for them without hesitation. No matter how much blood stained their hands, no matter what nightmares haunted their sleep, you were there. Unshaken. Unyielding in your love, hands gentle and soft as you cradled them close and warm.
So they had never needed to know about the things you kept buried.
The past you refused to unearth. The things you could do, the person you had been before them- before you had a home to call your own, before you had people who held you just as carefully as you held them.
They didn’t need to know, and you didn’t need to think about it.
Until they went missing.
You first learned something was wrong when John’s daily check-in didn’t come.
It had always been a habit of his, something he did without fail, no matter how far away he was. Just to let you know I’m breathing, love. That was what he had said, years ago, the first time he had explained it to you. You had teased him for it- What, you don’t trust me to not burn the house down?- but he had only smiled, voice steady and sure when he told you, I like knowing you’re safe.
It had never failed. Not once. Even when he himself could not text you, Lasswell herself assured you they were fine and merely had to be careful.
But now came the silence.
No messages. No calls. No updates.
You tried not to panic. They were on a mission, after all. Maybe something had gone wrong with their comms, or maybe they had been forced to go dark, and Lasswell was busy. It had happened before, and they had always come back to you, whole and alive, pressing their faces into your neck, murmuring apologies and reassurances.
But then a full week passed.
Then two.
And no one would tell you a thing and Lasswell wasn’t picking up, either.
You had tried- had called, had knocked on doors, had pushed until you were met with polite deflections and stone-cold refusals.
“I’m sorry, ma’am, but that information is classified.”
“There’s nothing we can share at this time.”
“We appreciate your patience.”
Patience.
As if you would sit here, helpless, and just wait. Hopeless, and helpless, and unable to do a single thing to help then.
No. No, you had done that before. You had waited before. And it had cost you everything.
You weren’t that girl anymore. You weren’t a victim of circumstance, hoping for scraps of kindness, praying for someone to do right by you.
If no one would help, you would do it yourself; because they were yours, and they were the best thing that have ever happened to you, and you weren’t going to lose them.
Tracking them down was easier than you expected.
You had spent years curating the image of someone soft and harmless, someone not worth keeping secrets from. And people loved to talk. Especially when they thought you were just a grieving, desperate woman trying to find a lost fiancé and his friends.
All it had taken was a few well-placed words, a few tearful looks, and doors had opened.
It had taken only days to pinpoint their last known location, then. After you’d hunted down Laswell, and had her help you. Though you were glad to see that she was working to find out where they were, as well, and merely lacked the manpower because of some general named Shepherd.
You filed the name away for later thoughts.
A warlord with connections to arms smuggling in Eastern Europe. An old base, abandoned by one regime and taken over by another. And your men had been sent in to dismantle it.
But they hadn’t come back. MIA, the reports said.
You didn’t think. You didn’t hesitate. You didn’t care for those three letters. You moved.
You gathered supplies, mapped out your route, planned your approach with the precision of someone who had done it before. You emptied old caches, dusted off weapons you hadn’t touched in years, and set off.
The infiltration was clean; a single shadow among many, slipping between patrols, cutting down obstacles with silent, brutal efficiency. Years it may have been, you hadn’t gotten as rusty as you’d feared you’d be.
You had never been squeamish. You had learned long ago that softness had no place in survival- but it could thrive and bloom in the aftermath, a stubborn weed that eventually makes way for a full bouquet.
But this was different.
This was fury burning in your blood as you carved a path forward, every movement precise- you couldn’t afford any less.
You didn’t stop, no matter what.
Not until you found them at last, and your heart ached something fierce abd sharp in your chest.
Caged. Beaten. Bound but not broken- and drugged.
I should have been more rough, you mourn for a split second. An easy death was more mercy than what was deserved.
John’s head lifted first, eyes glassy and unfocused. “Love-?”
Then Simon, bloodied but breathing, his body sluggish with whatever chemicals they had pumped into him. Every part of him was covered in blood and cuts.
Johnny’s voice, then, hoarse and raw, full of disbelief and worry. “No. No, you’re not- this insnae real-“
And Kyle, whose breath hitched as you knelt beside him, gentle fingers brushing against his bruised face.
They thought they were dreaming; they thought you weren’t real.
And maybe that was a… mercy.
Because if they had been clear-headed, if they had seen what you had done to get here, if they had watched the way you had cut down anyone in your path with merciless efficiency-
They would have looked at you differently.
And you couldn’t bear that. To have their illusion of your gentleness shattered like that…
So you played along.
Whispered reassurances, pressed kisses to sweat-damp foreheads, untied their bindings with careful hands. You coaxed them to move, guided them through the corridors you’d emptied, wiped away the blood that dripped from their skinz
And when they sagged against you, too dazed to fight, too lost in the haze of their drugged delirium, you held them-
Kept them safe, and brought them home.
Later, they woke in a hospital, clean and stitched and safe.
You were already there, fussing over them, your voice soft and sweet, your fingers gentle as you pressed cool cloths to fever-warm skin, brushed stray curls from foreheads, adjusted pillows and blankets with quiet determination. Dressed in something white and pink, the colors of innocence, nails cleaned of blood even if your hands will never be truly clean.
You looked the same as ever.
Pretty and delicate, their lovely girl, their tender-hearted sweetheart.
And for all that had happened, all that they had suffered, all that you had done-
They never suspected a single thing, and you didn’t tell them; didn’t tell them that there had been no extraction team. That there had been no grand military rescue- not even from the the same military that had abandoned them.
(His name was General Shepherd. You will not forget it- you’d need to carve his name on the bullet you’ll save just for him, after all.)
That it had been you.
Only you.
Only Laswell knew the truth, and she would keep your secret because she understood what it meant to protect the people you loved.
And if you had to carry this weight alone to keep them from ever looking at you like you were something other-
So be it.
You sat beside John, pressing a kiss to his temple as his fingers curled weakly around yours.
You smiled at Simon when his hand brushed against your knee, seeking reassurance, seeking you, his eyes tired.
You let Johnny hold you, his arms tight around your waist as he mumbled something unintelligible against your shoulder, still half-lost in the remnants of the drugs.
And when Kyle murmured: “At leas’ you’re safe, pretty.” His voice thick with sleep-
You just smiled and ran your fingers carefully through his hair, and held them the way you always had.
And pretended that everything was exactly the same.
(Part Two)
#noona.writes#noona.posts#tags coming later bc this is very corny and self indulgent i need to gathet coursge for it#cod x reader#cod x you#cod#tf 141 x reader#tf 141 x you#tf 141#cod imagines#john price x reader#poly!141 x reader#ghost x reader#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost riley x you#soap x reader#ghost x you#gaz x reader#johnny soap mctavish x reader#poly 141 x reader#poly 141#kyle gaz garrick x you#poly!141#soap x you#kyle gaz garrick x reader
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Being in an Established Relationship with Jayce and Viktor • Headcanon
(Gif not mine)
Request: I am desperate for more Jayce x Viktor x Reader content! Would I be able to request headcanons for what an established relationship with them would be like?? 🥺 -- @spatialwave
Warnings: gn!reader, first time writing arcane and jayvik so I hope it's all good!!
A.N: Andy (@spatialwave) has inspired me so much so PLEASE go read their beautiful writing! You need to understand I got this request LAST NIGHT, I just had to bang it out I was writing like a FIEND. I loved writing this so much, I hope to write more in the future!! Hope you enjoy!
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Being in a relationship with Jayce and Viktor is like being a part of an old married couple that simultaneously bickers all the time and is just falling in love all over again every day
Jayce is like a ray of sunshine on a summer afternoon
He's clingy--but not overwhelmingly so. Jayce just has to have some sort of body part on either of you at all times (except in the lab unless he's feeling especially in love that day)
He loves putting his arms around your waist, chest pressed up against your back and lips ghosting over your neck. Jayce is a bit more subtle with Viktor, since your other partner prefers smaller touches, so their fingers are always tangled together. Some days Jayce will even sneak his hand into Vik's back pocket, making the slimmer boy light up red from the neck up
Jayce is also the type of boyfriend that will always have you two on his mind. He picks a flower from someone's garden to give it to you because "the vibrancy of its color reminded me of your eyes," or buys a little knick knack for Viktor because "I thought you would find it hilariously stupid" (Viktor will put it on his already cluttered desk at the lab because Jayce was right, it is stupidly funny)
Jayce will always get an A for effort because even if he can't remember how you like your coffee or tea, it's the thought that counts
Has bigass puppy dog eyes and he fucking knows how to use them against you two
All he has to do is look between you and Vik with those golden eyes are you're both putty in his hands
Speaking of being putty in hands, Jayce is the cuddler of the relationship
Which is good because he is also the space heater of the relationship too
Will basically have Viktor curled up on one side and you on the other. His face will be buried in Viktor's hair, placing sleepy kissed on his scalp. His fingers will rub circles on the small of your back. Jayce is the best pillow and blanket in all of Piltover AND Zaun
Viktor, on the other hand, is like the moon at midnight
He loves the both of you in a slightly different way than Jayce
While Jayce is more touchy and exuberant with his love, Vik is certainly more subtle, though that doesn't mean he loves you two any less
He is actually exceptionally smitten with you and Jayce. It's like his walls come crashing down whenever you two are with him. He could come back from having a disagreement about a project with Heimer, with his jaw clenched and brows furrowed, and then he'll spot you and Jayce in your shared apartment and it all melts away
Viktor isn't carrying the world on his shoulders with his partners around him. He knows that you guys will lift the hefty weight from his shoulders
While Viktor isn't as touchy ad you or Jayce, he shows his presence in other ways.
Viktor will always have at least one eye on you at all times. It's not that he doesn't trust you two (on the contrary, you two are the only people he trusts with his life), he just needs to know his lovers are ok
Jayce could be tinkering with something in the lab and 50% of Viktor's attention will be on him. Making sure he doesn't shock himself or mix the wrong chemicals together. And if that does ever happen, Viktor drops everything to help him. He masks his worry with wit, but the mask is transparent for you and Jayce
Viktor is also the one with the extreme attention to detail. Your coffee or tea is always right and always the right temperature in the morning. A scarf is always hanging on the coat rack near the front door on chilly days for you. Puts a bookmark in the book you're reading when you unexpectedly fall asleep reading on the couch
He is so big on being a gentleman. Will open doors for you two, pull out seats during a nice dinner. Also is the type to lift up your hand so he can kiss your knuckles (he knows this drives you wild and he struggles to hide a smirk at your heated face)
The three of you are witty and biting and funny in your own ways, quips are basically thrown around every hour of the day. The day isn't complete without someone rolling their eyes. Teasing knows no bounds--the apartment, the lab, a fancy dinner, in front of councilmen and women--doesn't matter
Every day you feel lucky to have these two as your partners, you really hit the jackpot with them. They're caring and attentive and loving in ways no one else is
And they feel the exact same way
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#arcane#arcane x reader#arcane x you#jayce talis#jayce talis x reader#jayce talis x you#jayce talis x viktor#jayce x viktor#viktor arcane#viktor x reader#viktor x you#jayvik#jayvik x reader#jayvik x you#arcane headcanons#arcane fanfiction
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Another thing I absolutely love about Astarion’s redemption arc is how some narrative threads introduced in Act 1 find their resolution in the good ending.
The first and most obvious one revolves around the beautiful concept of a gift.
When the player offers their blood to Astarion, he receives a gift that goes beyond mere nourishment. In that moment, what Tav/Durge is giving him, beyond blood, is understanding and trust.
And this concept comes full circle after the ritual, where this narrative thread finds its conclusion. That’s when Spawn Astarion thanks the player for the gift they have given him—gently guiding him by the hand toward a new path where he is truly free.
But not just free. As the vampire spawn himself says in that ending, he is honestly free. And for that gift, he is grateful.
I think that’s absolutely beautiful.
But the meaning runs even deeper than that. This ties into the theme of seeing and being seen—not in a superficial sense.
After all, Astarion’s appearance is both a curse and a shield, something he has learned to wield, just like his mannerisms, his charming words, and the sarcasm he uses as a distraction.
It’s an important concept because it means going beyond the surface, seeing him for who he truly is, feeling him, and experiencing him in his entirety.
Astarion deeply struggles with his condition—not just as a slave, but as a vampire. He’s so happy to be able to act human again thanks to the Illithid tadpole, to do simple, mundane things like crossing running water or entering a house without permission. And let’s not even talk about his joy at standing under the sunlight.
When you meet him on the beach for the first time and reveal what will happen if they don’t get rid of the Illithid tadpoles, Astarion’s bitter reaction, complete with laughter, shows just how much it truly weighs on him: "Of course it’s going to turn me into a monster, what else did I expect?!"
In fact, when his vampiric nature is revealed for the first time during the bite scene, he fears rejection and is quick to emphasize that he’s not some kind of monster. The morning after, when Shadowheart tactlessly points out this aspect of him, his expression changes, and we can see how being perceived as a monster wounds him. It keeps him at a distance, sets him apart as something other. Later, he will even say outright that he wants to be treated like a person—not as a slave, not as a vampire. Just a person. Not superior, not inferior. Exactly like everyone else. Because Astarion wants to be part of the world, to reconnect with people.
This is especially clear when he approves of Tav’s perspective—that he could find a place for himself in the world, where he could be accepted, supported, if he is willing to open up and do the same for others. He approves because the idea appeals to him—it makes him feel like he can belong. Not as a monster, but as a person finding his way back into the world he once inhabited.
But I’m digressing.
The mirror scene isn’t just there by chance—it’s narratively strategic. In that moment, Astarion explicitly asks the player what they see, because he wants to know how the world perceives him. He worries about how others see him precisely because he feels separate, othered, like a monster. And it’s not a matter of appearance—Astarion knows he’s gorgeous. He’s heard it thousands of times over the centuries. But he’s insecure about his place within the group, within society, within the world.
That’s why he appreciates it when Tav/Durge reassures him on the two things that trouble him most—his piercing gaze (the red eyes of a vampire) and his dangerous smile (the sharp fangs of a predator). He relaxes because, in that moment, he feels accepted. Because he realizes his defining traits aren’t the insurmountable barriers he thought they were. Because the person in front of him sees him—not through the lens of prejudice, but for who he really is.
This theme returns later, during the confrontation with Aurelia and Leon, when Astarion deflects the idea of being heroic by saying, "I can’t be what you see in me." Again, the motif of seeing, of looking deeper, of recognizing something more, of reading between the lines—both of the narrative and of his character.
And it’s beautiful when, the morning after the ritual, that relaxed, happy Astarion, with that wonderful smile on his lips, says that Tav/Durge saw something in him. Something different from everyone else. Something beyond his monstrous nature, beyond his darkest intentions, beyond his fear.
Tav/Durge saw him. Saw his potential.
And if you’re in a romantic relationship with him, in the graveyard scene, Astarion will bring up this idea once again. With a heroic Tav/Durge, Astarion feels safe. And he feels seen. Seen, for god’s sake. That’s huge.
This is where this narrative arc—about perception, about seeing him throughout the entire journey—finds its resolution. Astarion is truly more than what Cazador made him to be. He breaks free from the pattern of monster/vampire. He chooses to start living again. To rediscover himself. To reclaim his identity in the most human way possible—through the world and the people around him.
Perhaps his body has not regained its human traits, but spawn Astarion is, without a doubt, the Astarion who has reclaimed his humanity the most.
#astarion#astarion ancunin#baldur's gate 3#baldurs gate 3#baldur's gate#baldur's gate astarion#astarion bg3#baldurs gate 3 astarion#bg3 astarion#spawn astarion
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Day 6: Dry Hump- James Potter

Summary: James Potter was your best friend, and he was unequivocally in love with Lily Evans. However, he has one secret he trusts only with you: he’s never kissed anyone.
Tags: 18+ readers only, smut, inexperienced James & experienced Reader, friends with benefits vibes, kissing/making out, dry humping, cumming in pants, teasing, nearly caught
Part 2 // Part 3
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James Potter was your best friend. He had many best friends, including the other Marauders and fellow Gryffindors, but he was YOUR best friend and had been since the first year at Hogwarts. James was the one person you always ran to and shared all happy memories with; if you needed cheering up, he’d be the only one who could pull a smile to your lips. It had always been just the two of you until he became infatuated with Lily Evans.
It had been years of hearing about how wonderful Lily was, which you knew anyway as she was your friend. Finally, you convinced her to say yes to one date with James, even though she did wait until everyone was finishing their time at Hogwarts and about to graduate. He’d waited long enough, and you were thrilled to see him getting his dream date.
This was until he casually announced one day, “I’ve never kissed anyone”.
He’d mumbled it to himself under his breath. James had gone from pure exhilarated joy to fear and doubt at the weight he’d put on his shoulders for having to be the perfect date for Lily. You’d taken him to the Shrieking Shack to try and get away from everyone else so that James could blow off some steam, but all he’d done so far was sulk in his armchair and stare into the fire whilst waiting for Sirius and Remus to join after their lesson.
Then, out of the blue, he admitted his secret that he had yet to kiss anyone. A frown dawns on you as you turn away from the book in your hand to inspect the messy-haired Marauder next to you visually. “What?” you asked with a hint of uncertainty as if he was telling the truth, “How have you never kissed anyone before?” Your mind raced to all of the parties in the Gryffindor tower where most people, including yourself, had made out with others, but now that you thought about it, you’d never seen James lip-locked with anyone else.
It was James’ turn to frown as he looked at you blankly, “When would I have had time? I’ve just wanted to be with Lily, and she’s always said no when I’ve asked before. Anyway, I don’t see why you’re saying it in that tone; it’s not like you’ve been kissing loads of people”. You give James a tight-lipped smile to show that he was, in fact, very wrong with that statement. His eyes widen as he realises the truth, “Wait, you have? Since when?”
“James, how can you be shocked? I’ve kissed plenty of people before, especially during those parties with the fire whiskey that Sirius always steals for us. You wander off with the Marauders or fawn over Lily, and what am I supposed to do? Stand on my own? Absolutely not, I go and find some fun”.
Your best friend’s mouth drops open in shock. Still, he quickly covers it up by looking away grumpily, “Great, so I’m the only person in our year who hasn’t kissed anyone, and now, I’m going to take Lily out, and she’s going to refuse to see me again because I don’t know what I’m doing, we’re going to finish school, and I’ll never see her again, and I’ll die alone!”.
You couldn’t help but laugh at his over-the-top rant, shutting the book with a loud snap and facing him completely whilst still in your chair. “James, you need to chill out a bit; I’m sure it’ll be fine. Do you really think Lily’s been going around snogging loads of boys? I’m sure she’s just as inexperienced as you”.
James’ shoulders dropped in relief as he turned back towards you with hope in his hazel eyes, “Do you think so?”
Your face immediately gave it away that you’d been lying as you sighed, “Ok, I might have seen her making out with a Ravenclaw a year ago, but still, I wouldn’t worry about it! You’ll be excellent! You’re James Potter, the Gryffindor King, a founding Marauder and Gryffindor Seeker. You can sure as hell make out with Lily Evans correctly”.
The pretty Marauder smiled thankfully at your dramatic declaration, “That’s true, thanks, Sweetheart”. Relaxing back into your seat, the book returned to your hand, assuming the conversation was officially over. However, only a moment later, James is whining pathetically, “But what if I’m not good? What if I hurt her or lick her wrong or-”.
“Lick? Why are you licking her, James? I thought we were on about kissing?”
“We are! But you know, people use tongues and-”
“James, I don’t know what you want me to say; if you’re that petrified with kissing, why don’t we practice a little so you can stop freaking out”. It took you a couple of long seconds before the offer you’d just given him genuinely dawned on you. You weren’t sure why you had said it, expecting him to say no but wishing for him to calm down and thinking this was the only option.
James’ head snapped towards you, giving his full attention as he asked, “Wait, you’d do that?” He pushed himself up off the chair's arms, and his eyes were wide and hopeful again.
Lowering the book, you spoke slowly, “Yeah, sure. I mean, it’s just a kiss, and at least we’re friends, so no feelings have to be involved”.
“Yeah, that's a good point! Okay, right, so, um, how do we do this? Do I come over to you, or do we stand?”
Sighing at James, you stood abruptly, dropping the book and strutting to him with arms swinging. The marauder sits up suddenly, taking his feet off the stool he had been resting on as he stares up at you with wide eyes that you can see the whites of his eyes beneath his glasses. “What are you doing?” He questions uncertainly as you straddle his lap without a word, your knees resting on either side of his toned thighs, your fingers slipping around his neck and interlocking at the base of his skull.
“I’m going to kiss you, James. Is that alright with you?” You didn’t mean to sound sassy as you asked with a single raised questioning eyebrow, but you also needed to make sure that he was happy for this to continue.
Those two wide hazel eyes stared at your lips, licking his own to moisten as he slowly nodded, “Uh yeah, just tell me what to do.” A pang of sympathy rushed through your chest at seeing James becoming nervous, which was not usually a sight that you had to see as he was usually such a confident, happy person. You would have spent some time to explain that it was normal to be nervous during your first kiss, but you didn’t want to allow any more time for him to freak out, so loosening your intern locked fingers, you moved them to cup each of her freshly shaved cheeks and pressed your lips delicately against his. You wanted it to be quick enough that he didn’t even have time to tense, even though he did proceed to lock up as you moved back to assess his reaction.
“See, it’s not so scary. You’re supposed to enjoy this, James”. Thankfully, as your face lowered once more, he forced himself to take a steadying breath and relax the tension in his muscles as your lips caressed his.
They were softer than you’d anticipated, plump and smooth like a pillow and instantly, your eyes and his close. However, James surprised you by moving his first. His hand lifted and rested on your hip so gently that you hardly felt it until he gave your body a little squeeze to test the waters of how much he could get into the moment. So you rewarded him by pressing your face harder against his, lips beginning to move and rubbing against each other on instinct.
James even amazed himself with how naturally and quickly he could make out with you. Tilting your head, you deepened the kiss, nose pressing into his cheek so that you could smell his skin that had remnants of his aftershave, which was always spicy and woodsy. As the air became necessary, you pulled back enough to take deep, greedy breaths, now noticing he was doing the same thing but looking up at you with half-lidded eyes.
“So what did you think-”
James didn’t allow your sentence to finish as his other hand cupped along your jaw, pulling your face closer again until the two of you kissed with much more heat with the movements. His mouth opened wider to match how yours was moving against his; your heartbeat quickened as you leaned further into his tall, warm body, melting into his touch and kiss.
Then you wanted to take a risk and licked his bottom lip, which you were ultimately greeted with a praising deep groan of satisfaction that vibrated James’ entire chest and sent tingles straight to your core.
Ok, wow, you thought as James attempted and succeeded with his own lick back against your tongue; you were definitely getting turned on by this. As if he was reading your mind, James pressed harder on your hips, willing you to move down, which you did, your skirt pushing up on your thighs so that when you sat on his crotch, your panty-covered pussy was flush against the material of his trousers.
As one, the two of you pulled away from each other. Mainly because you were now sitting on his very hard erection and also because he knew you could feel his evidence of being aroused. You both stare at each other with wide, unblinking eyes, lips slightly swollen and the taste of his spit still on your tongue.
However, you didn’t want to stop and awkwardly sit back in your seat, and he wasn’t rushing to push you off, either. You were horny, and so was he. Yes, James Potter was your best friend, but that didn’t have to matter; you just wanted him to enjoy the moment and show that it wasn’t as scary as he thought.
Enough time passed, and if he didn’t want to continue, he would have said something by now, so you took the opportunity to lean back in, your thumb attempting to soothe him, stroking across his cheek in timid circles. As your mouths reconnected, your hips ground down on his crotch. You were hoping that he knew enough about anatomy to tell that the warmth from your pussy was a sign of arousal, wanting him to know you were just as turned on as he was.
You do it a few more times, rubbing back and forth with increasing pressure until James makes a pained noise that has you stopping altogether and checking in on him.
He’s looking everywhere but at you, as he apologises, “Sorry, it’s just these trousers are tight and rubbing me painfully”.
“You could just take them off”, you say once again, not thinking before you speak. James looks at you with dramatically wide eyes as he, too, realised what you’d just said. Quickly, you clarified, “I’m not saying that to have sex or anything; I just mean, we could kinda carry on doing what we are doing, but if your trousers are hurting, then just in your boxers”.
You’re surprised by his automatic response of a nod, yes, his arousal blocking all thoughts of Lily as he begins to undo his belt easily. Rising onto your knees to give him room, he pushed the offending material until his thighs were bare and his plaid boxers were on display, barely containing his length. Not wanting him to feel exposed, you lowered yourself once more, and both groaned at the contact, yours at a higher pitch as you could feel the entire outline of his cock against your cunt.
James was bigger than you’d thought and was currently pointing down his left thigh, so you angled your hips in this direction. Tilting your hips forward slightly, your clit grazed along his shaft, causing a hitch in your breath as it caused pleasure to pool in your abdomen, moisture slickening your hole with each movement.
You’re breathing just as heavily as he is, lips still moving against each other, exploring, tasting, needing more. You were kind of proud of him when he moved his face down your jaw, leaving open-mouthed kisses and causing more pleasure to pulse through you. You were half tempted to rise onto your knees again to show him the evidence of your arousal that had soaked through your panties and onto his boxers, but you didn’t want it to stop.
As your fingers delved into his messy black hair to hold his face closer, he thrust his hips up against yours to add to his stimulation. He was still apprehensive, so he didn’t push too hard, but he rocked back and forth until his tip was pressed against your clothed folds. The muscular thighs beneath yours tensed with each thrust, the muscles defined from all his years of playing quidditch.
His hands remained in place, one on the opposite side of your jaw to where his mouth still kissed, and the other hand helped to move your hips back and forth in time with his own ruts. You’d never actually gotten off like this with anyone before. Usually, underwear would be removed at this point, and more direct contact could occur, but it was still exciting to have some barriers between you. The lace of your underwear was quite rough against your most sensitive area, especially your engorged throbbing clit. You were sure to be sore afterwards, especially with the amount of pressure you were rubbing against each other; with each passing second, the need to find completion made you both desperate.
As his lips found yours again, his tongue began to delve and explore the hollow of your mouth, along your palate and even over your teeth; your pussy began to clench, fire blooming in your core with the impending release.
Pulling back, your fingers moved to rest on his shoulders to hold on tighter as you quickly moaned, “Please don’t stop; I’m going to cum”.
James moaned huskily, out of breath, but both of his hands were now on your hips, moving both his hips and yours faster to find his orgasm. Resting your forehead on his, you both shared the same area, still tasting the other in your mouths, sweat beginning to coat your faces. You were sure you could feel his own wet patch against your arse cheek from where precum was dribbling from his tip and staining his underwear.
“Ah, fuck- James!” your head tilts back as you finally orgasm, thighs shaking and pussy fluttering around nothing. However, just as you were beginning to come down from your pleasurable high, James suddenly grabbed you painfully, both arms wrapping around your waist as he sat up further on the chair, nearly knocking you off of him if it wasn't for his grip around your midsection. Reassuringly your arms wrapped around his shoulders as his face nuzzled into your chest, his body shivering as thick spurts of cum soaked his boxers.
His moans were like music to your ears and sounded slightly pathetic, making you cling to him more, attempting to run your fingers through his hair to calm the crazy style, but to no avail. Your pussy felt like it was on fire due to the rough stimulation and the untouched orgasm, but it felt so good you savoured the sensation for a few minutes whilst trying to catch your breath.
“There you go, Potter. Not only have you kissed a girl for the first time, but you’ve also made her cum”.
James laughs, loosening his grip slightly to look up at you, but then you both hear the worst noise imaginable: voices from a few floors below, especially those of Sirius and Remus. You scrambled to your feet, straightening your clothes and sitting back in your chair, picking up the book and opening it to a random page as James pulled up his trousers, both of you ignoring the bodily juices completely.
James just about had his feet back on the footstool before Sirius and Remus walked in, but both immediately halted and looked between you and James. It was Sirius who spoke first, eyes squinting in accusation, “Why do you both look so guilty right now? What did you do?”
#james potter#james potter smut#james potter x reader#james potter one shot#harry potter smut#harry potter#mine*#kinktober#kinktober 2023
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under that attitude | j.potter
note : I'll have you know it was very funny to take breaks from writing this to create rollercoasters on my roblox theme park tycoon that I managed on the side, I cannot just do one thing lately - at least it was productive
warnings : some angst and a lot of overthinking, pining, misunderstandings (only a bit), two dumb idiots avoiding their feelings, idiots in love, a whole lot of fluff despite the denial
You were always good at keeping secrets - especially the one about your Legilimency. No one could know, because you didn’t have a solid prediction of how the wizarding world would react to that information. But everything changes the day you hear the truth behind his insults - the way his heart stutters when you argue, the desperate, half-terrified way he wants you. 4.9k words

. . . Like, I want you, bless my soul, and I ain't gotta tell him. I think he knows.

Like how most depressing things are, it was worse at night.
The castle breathed in the dark - long, slow sighs that rattled through stone and bone alike - and it was then, in the hush between curfew and dawn, that the voices were loudest. Not aloud. Never aloud. In your head. Flickering, always uninvited.
You leaned against the cold wall outside the Slytherin common room, your head tipped back, eyes closed. The torches burned low, sputtering against damp stone. Somewhere down the passage, you could hear the slow drip of water, the groan of ancient pipes. Familiar sounds.
The other ones - the ones that weren't supposed to exist - you kept locked tight behind your ribs.
You hadn't meant to become a Legilimens. Hadn't studied it, hadn't even known the word when it first happened. It had just. . . started. It started as barely audible whispers at first. At eleven years old, you'd thought everyone heard them - snatches of feeling, flickers of thought that didn't belong to you.
It wasn't until second year, during a Charms duel, that you'd understood: when your opponent raised her wand and spat a hex - and you had already known she was going to - because you had heard her panicked mind scream "Left - aim for her left!" before she ever moved.
You’d dodged without thinking. You won without even expecting an upper-hand thanks to hearing her thoughts and you’d walked back to the Slytherin huddle under curious eyes, your skin cold with the realization that something was wrong.
There were rules about things like this, from everything you have read so far.
Legilimency was dark magic in most people's eyes - an invasion, a violation - a talent reserved for those who couldn't be trusted. Monsters wore polite faces. Mind readers didn't get second chances.
So you told no one. Not even your dormmates, whose secrets you could taste sometimes when they laughed too hard.
And most days, it was fine. Manageable. If you stayed guarded. If you didn't look too closely. It only slipped when people were loud inside - when their feelings boiled over and the world around you blurred at the edges and suddenly their thoughts weren’t behind their teeth anymore, but bleeding out into yours.
You hadn't meant to overhear anyone.
But here, in the long velvet dark of Hogwarts, the mind had no walls.
Potions was a war zone on a good day. On a bad day, when the Gryffindors shared the clasroom with Slytherins, it was mutually assured destruction. Why the professors allow for this inter-house collaboration was beyond you, if there was a house the snakes mildly respect other than themselves - it would be the Ravenclaws.
You sat at your usual table near the back, carefully slicing a bundle of valerian roots, pretending not to notice James Potter throwing glances your way like hexes. He was always known to prank Slytherins, and you were not straying his radar with how you competed on the pitch often.
You anticipated it but still braced yourself for impact.
"Careful, ____," he drawled loud enough for half the room to hear. "Wouldn’t want you brewing up something - oh, I don't know - illegal."
You didn't even flinch, you saw the insult coming a mile away and barely rolled your eyes at how lame it was.
"Touching concern, Potter," you murmured, not looking up. "Planning to report me to the authorities or just desperate for my attention again?"
A few Gryffindors snickered. Lily Evans shot James a warning glare over her cauldron. He ignored it with practiced ease, an amused smile playing at his lips.
He strode closer, arms folded, the portrait of a boy who’d never been told no. Which is funny given how he's very much like a spoiled pureblood heir, only his robe colours were different.
You neglected to point out how great he would be in your house, he’d thrive alongside the other snot-nosed pureblood brats.
"Just making sure the dark wizard training program’s running on schedule," he said, smirking. "Be a shame if someone as - what's the term? Frighteningly competent - wasn't putting in the hours."
You looked up then, meeting his gaze coolly and that was when it happened.
The world shifted - not outwardly, not visibly - but inside your head, the way it always did when someone's emotions rose too high and their mind got too loud. And James Potter, his mind was practically screaming at you, demanding to be invaded.
James's smirk stayed fixed on his face, not faltering even when your sharp gaze held his - full of mockery and bravado.
But beneath it, like a crack in the ice, you heard:
"Look at her. Smug. Brilliant. Bloody hell, she's so pretty it’s infuriating."
Your knife slipped, slicing too hard through the root. You caught yourself enough for anyone to not notice the stumble - steady hands with no visible flinch - but your heart jumped painfully against your ribs.
Stay calm.
Stay normal.
Outwardly, you quirked a brow. "If you spent half as much time on your coursework as you do worrying about me, Potter, you might actually pass your exams."
More laughter. A few Gryffindors - Sirius Black among them - hooted loud enough to make Slughorn look up from his desk.
James flushed slightly, his smirk faltering before he masked it with exaggerated affront.
You went back to your valerian root, slicing with vicious precision, pretending your ears weren’t ringing with the echo of his mind’s betrayal.
He hated you, he said. You were rivals, he said.
And yet.
"Bloody hell, she's so pretty it’s infuriating."
You didn't even want to think about what else he might be shouting inside that head of his.
You just had to survive the rest of class without cracking first.

The library was supposed to be a safe place - for you. Just you and the books and the quietness, somehow people's thoughts are quieter here. They get too focused that your abilities were not being demanded by their thoughts.
Low voices, scratching quills, sound of parchment - no loud Gryffindor boys itching for a fight. No accidental mind-reading incidents. Just quiet.
Or it should have been.
You hunched over a thick tome on advanced defensive charms, trying and pathetically failing to focus. The words blurred, your mind replaying Potions over and over.
'Look at her. Smug. Brilliant. Bloody hell, she's so pretty it’s infuriating.'
You shook your head sharply.
"No," you muttered under your breath. "No way."
Maybe you'd misheard. There was absolutely no way, the lack of sleep from slaving over N.E.W.T.s and the nearing Gryffindor vs Slytherin Quidditch match was getting to you, taking its toll. You convince yourself that was all.
Maybe James Potter didn't actually think you were. . . that.
You sank lower in your seat, dragging a hand across your face.
You had rules about this. You never took strong flashes from someone and assumed they were true. Minds were messy, complicated things. Thoughts didn't always mean anything.
Still. You started noticing it.

The next day in Charms, you caught James looking at you across the room, chin propped on his hand, staring. When you met his gaze, he immediately dropped a book on the floor and made a big show of retrieving it.
Later, walking down the corridor between classes, you heard him before you saw him - laughing too loudly with Sirius, knocking shoulders with Peter Pettigrew, and the second he spotted you, his whole posture changed. Straighter. And then, predictably, he opened his mouth.
"Watch it, snake," he called, as you passed.
You rolled your eyes and kept walking, but your fingers twitched at your sides. Because even though his words were full of spite, his mind had been humming loud enough to burn:
"There she is. Merlin, she’s - "
You cut yourself off before the thought fully formed. You didn't want to know.
James Potter was many things - loud, insufferable, reckless - but he couldn't actually like you.
Could he?
You buried yourself deeper into your books, trying to drown out the noise - both outside and inside your head.
But the thing about secrets was: they had a way of refusing to stay quiet for long.
The air still smelled like grass and almost-rain when you cut across the pitch, broom slung lazily over one shoulder.
You’d only come to watch - Slytherin practice had ended hours ago - but somehow you’d found yourself lingering, pretending to study the Gryffindor formations. Pretending not to watch a certain messy-haired idiot loop the sky like he owned it.
You should have left.
You should have.
Boots scuffed behind you. You didn’t have to turn to know who it was.
"Well, well, well," James Potter's voice drawled, closer than you expected. "Didn't realize Slytherins were so obsessed with Gryffindor athleticism."
You snorted, not bothering to face him yet. "Don't flatter yourself, Potter. I was studying your mistakes."
He caught up easily, falling into step beside you as you made for the gates. His hair was still damp from flying, sticking to his forehead. There was a smudge of mud across his cheek, and he grinned like he hadn't a care in the world.
"Sure you were, sweetheart."
You rolled your eyes so hard it hurt - but your heart stuttered.
Because even before it hit you fully, you could feel it - the swell of emotion, bright and reckless, practically leaking out of him.
And then you heard it:
"If she knew what I really thought of her, I'd die. I'd let her hex me if it meant she'd touch me."
You stumbled.
Just a little. Just enough that you hoped he thought you tripped on the uneven ground.
But inside? There is absolute chaos brewing in you.
You recovered quickly, shooting him a scathing look, but James only laughed - like you were the most amusing thing he'd seen all day. Given the track record of his thoughts, there might be some weight to that.
He ruffled his already-ruined hair and gave you a wink that nearly made you want to hex him on principle.
"Careful, snake. Wouldn't want you falling for me."
You scoffed. "As if."
But your mind was spinning.
Because it was real. All of it - the glances, the smirks, the insults that were less venom and more cover.
James Potter didn’t hate you. He hated how much he wanted you.

The night was unbearably still, the only sound the quiet ripple of the Black Lake against the shore. You sat by the water, your knees drawn up to your chest, staring at the moonlight dancing on the surface. Your breath came in slow, measured patterns, but inside, it was chaos.
You liked coming here to help calm yourself - the sound of the soft ripples of water, the loneliness of it all as the moon shone brightly. Finally, it's quiet - truly quiet.
No person around whose privacy you could invade.
You had never wanted to know what others were thinking. You had never asked for this. But it had happened. You were a Legilimens.
And now, you knew too much.
James Potter likes you. He wants you.
The thought shouldn’t have had the power it did. It shouldn’t have twisted inside you like this, leaving you cold and unsettled. But it did. And you hated yourself for it.
You could still hear his voice, taunting you in Potions, the insults he threw your way. "Dark wizard in training," he'd called you, his words sharp and cruel. But it wasn’t his words that hurt, was it? It was the thoughts beneath them.
"Bloody hell, she's gorgeous when she's angry."
You froze, the echo of those words still too fresh, too sharp.
But you couldn’t tell him. You couldn’t let anyone know as it would open a pandora’s box of undesirables you dared not explore outside the wee hours when your head feels like it might cave in on itself.
Legilimency was a curse. It was rare, dangerous, and feared. Wizards who had been caught using it had been cast out, exiled to live on the fringes of society. Families had been ruined, careers destroyed.
And worse - those who could read minds were feared. There were whispers about what those with the power could do with it. How easily they could manipulate people. Control them.
Or perhaps the articles and books you have read were just laying it on very thick, making a spectacle out of something that was out of what society considered ordinary but you couldn’t risk it.
As a Slytherin, it was in your nature to always preserve yourself. Your well-being came first, so every action is well thought-out for your benefit - including hiding your ability away in shame.
People don't take kindly to having their minds read, the mind is one very powerful thing - a vast vault of secrets. You could very well weaponize people’s thoughts and secrets against them.
You’d keep quiet. Keep pretending you didn’t know. Even if it gnawed at you from the inside. Even if every part of you screamed to just tell him, to confront him, to understand what the hell was going on in that arrogant Gryffindor head of his.
You swallowed hard, standing up and brushing your hands off on your robes. The weight of your secret settled like lead in your chest.
You’ll pretend. You’ll keep it secret. And maybe - just maybe - you’ll survive.
Because that is why the hat sorted you to wear green robes, because you were not the type to grab James Potter by his tie to confront him and demand some explanation for the things he thought about you.
You walked back toward the castle, the darkness wrapping around you like a cloak. The sound of your footsteps on the cobblestone echoed in the quiet night.

The cauldron before you is bubbling with that familiar greenish glow, steam rising like smoke. Your fingers are quick, precise - just the right amount of crushed powdered moonstone, stirred counterclockwise, steady, controlled.
James Potter is sitting across from you, as always, only this time he's making a show of it. His elbows are planted on the table, chin in his palm, eyes fixed on you. And that smug expression. The one that makes your insides twist.
"Look at her. She’s so - "
You shut the thought out. It is your absolute misfortune that he settled on sharing a table with you when the Professor demanded some inter-house collaboration for today’s class due to Dumbledore’s insistence.
It doesn’t matter. You have a potion to finish.
But, of course, James never misses an opportunity to make you hate him just a little bit more - if hate is truly what you have been feeling.
“You’re stealing looks at me, _____. Thinking of what unforgivable to use, eh?”
You barely hear the words, your mind too focused on the process in front of you. But you hear the tone. You always hear the tone. And that’s enough.
You don’t look up from your potion, but the words slide out of your mouth like a reflex, sharp as ever. “What’s your problem, Potter? Can’t keep your mouth shut for one class?”
The words are meant to sting, meant to remind him that this rivalry isn’t just one-sided. But as you snap at him, the air thick with the tension of old wounds, your own mind is buzzing with something far worse.
"Merlin, she smells amazing."
The thought - completely out of nowhere slams into your mind like a train. Your hands falter for a second, a stray drop of essence splashing over the edge of your cauldron. You curse under your breath.
But that’s nothing compared to the way your heart jumps in your chest.
"Stop thinking about her like that, Potter. Just focus."
It’s like his voice is in your head - no, not just his voice. It’s his thoughts. His internal struggle, raw and unfiltered. And it’s all about you, as if all the time spent learning at Hogwarts were useless when all he could think about was you, you, you.
You almost choke. Almost spill the entire potion.
But you don’t. You manage to keep your face cool, eyes fixed on your cauldron. You won’t let him see the effect he’s having on you.
James doesn’t see the way you flinch, the way you want to scream and laugh all at once. He doesn’t know that you can hear every stupid, misguided thought racing through his head.
He’s still talking, probably making fun of you, probably insulting your potion-making technique. But inside, it’s all just a blur of "please don’t notice", how good you smell and "how is she this good at everything?"
You can’t keep doing this. You can’t keep pretending you hate him, when his equally-annoying voice spouted compliments and confessions in your head. Like he was right by your ear screaming them.
But you have to. Because you know. You know what he’s thinking. What he really thinks about you. And it’s driving you mad - as much as he is driving himself mad.
"She’s making it look so easy. Stop it, James."
You don’t flinch this time. You just keep your hands steady, your face calm, pretending like none of it’s happening. Pretending like the weight of his thoughts isn’t burning through your skin, making you want to dunk your head into the boiling cauldron.
It’s maddening. And you’re beginning to wonder how much longer you can keep pretending you don’t know.

The Quidditch pitch was alive with energy, the roar of the crowd drowning out all other sounds. Gryffindor versus Slytherin - the match everyone was waiting for, one that had your Quidditch captain on everyone’s rears all semester.
The teams soared high, the Quaffle exchanged between players as they raced towards the goalposts. It was fast, furious, and wildly competitive.
You gripped your broom tightly, eyes locked on the Quaffle as you swerved past a Bludger. You were focused, focused enough that you could almost tune out everything else - everything, except for him.
Merlin, despite the heat and chaos of the match, you could still hear him through them with how absolutely loud he was as if he was projecting his thoughts to you on purpose.
James Potter, the Gryffindor starchaser, was on the opposite team. The moment you locked eyes, he flashed that insufferable grin, like he’d already won. He was always cocky, always loud. But this time, it felt different. There was something in the way he was watching you.
"Watch out, snake!" he shouted, a taunt just loud enough for everyone to hear as you flew past him.
You didn't flinch, too used to the hostility. Instead, you focused on the Quaffle, your eyes scanning for an opening. You threw it, perfect precision, straight through the left hoop. Score. The crowd erupted into cheers, but the sound felt distant compared to the pounding in your ears.
But there it was again. His voice. Not in the air, but inside your head.
"She’s so good at this. Bloody hell, how does she do that?" James’ thoughts interrupted everything, like a crashing wave. "She moves like - like she was born to fly. Makes me want to just - "
You clenched your jaw, trying to force the thoughts out of your head. This was bad. So bad. But no matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t block out the next wave of thoughts that flooded your mind.
"I want to snog her senseless."
It hit you like a jolt to the chest. You had to swallow the sudden rush of heat in your throat. You didn’t dare look at him, not with the intensity of what was going on in his head.
The game was still raging on, but your focus was slipping. You were just trying to keep it together, trying to pretend this was normal - that it didn’t matter that James Potter, the James Potter, was thinking about you like that.
He wasn’t just mocking you any more. His admiration was clear, cutting through every insult and joke. It made everything ultimately worse.
You caught another pass - biting the insides of your cheeks, dodging a Bludger, and went for another shot. But now it wasn’t just about the game. It wasn’t about scoring or winning.
It was about trying to control your emotions - when everything in you wanted to break the rules. To reach out. To tell him what you were hearing.
But you couldn’t.
Because the last thing you needed was for him to find out just how much you felt the same.

You were unsure how to process the realization that not only is James Potter besotted with you, but you liked him back. You, the Slytherin chaser who he exchanged insults with on a daily every Potions class was just as besotted.
It is truly a doomed plot written out for some sick god’s entertainment watching you run around like a headless Hippogriff.
So here you are, ending up yet again in the black lake during wee hours, escaping the castle undetected yet again. It is the only place that could truly calm you down when even your own ehad gets too loud.
Unbeknownst to you was the Gryffindor hiding under an invisibility cloak, watching you. His eyes studied your face that seemed much more softer in the dead of night, how all the frown left you and all that remained was your features all bare.
He felt the strong urge to reach out, but that would reveal the fact he followed you. He noticed you leaving the castle on the map, and out of concern snuck out to follow you under the cloak. He knew the dangers outside the castle walls, he just wanted to make sure you were safe.
He did not expect to invade your privacy as you looked out into the lake like a person who had the entire weight of the world. He wonders just what could be going on inside your mind, wishing he could peer into it and maybe, maybe he could take some of that weight off.
He gripped his wand, feeling defeated.
He can’t even let you know how much he worries about you, how much he wonders about you - because that would be confronting the fact he has fallen for the enemy. That he would be going against his beliefs.
James Potter is an idiot. And he wanted nothing more than to snog you but instead he always resorts to insults, failing to do right by the bravery prided by his house.
You couldn’t hear his thoughts under the cloak, so you remained unaware of the boy watching you with so much love in his eyes that you were two hopeless idiots dancing around it.
“Merlin,” you breathed out exasperatedly. James Potter is not someone to lose sleep over, you knew that much should be true but nothing is working. No essay on Ancient Runes could distract you enough.

The school year was nearing its end. Despite yourself, you still managed to dodge out of confronting your feelings for one annoyingly-persistent Gryffindor and made it through passing your N.E.W.T.s with flying colours.
You had a decent set of “O” and “E” from your results, not getting anything less than Exceeding Expectations. Your parents are satisfied, not that you have ever failed them. Being a Slytherin is basically being bred for perfection.
Your academics and pureblood duties were already weighing on you but then -
“Oi, snake!” right.
James Potter is that one itch you can’t quite scratch enough to get rid of. A very handsome itch with a perfect set of teeth, that is.
“Sod off, Potter,” you roll your eyes as if following a perfected script by now, “I have better shit to do than deal with your childish antics.”
He frowned, something about the way you said it alerted him. There was no bite from that, all he heard was the exhaust from your voice as if you had forced those words out of you. He wanted to ask if you were okay, he thought it.
Before he could ask, you already gave an answer.
“I’m bloody fine,” you scoff. “Since when did you care?”
His frown deepened, impossibly so. He hadn’t asked it yet. You heard his confused pool of thoughts and your mistake began to dawn on you, you look at him, panicked and backed away before he could get another word out.
He must have called out your name, you weren’t sure. So you just made a run for it to avoid whatever he was about to say.
He ran after you, not bothering to entertain Sirius’ confused inquiry as he watched his best mate chase after a Slytherin. He didn’t think it was anything James needed backup with so he only watched, nudging Remus next to him who also watched.
“What do you think that’s about?” Sirius asked, face unreadable.
Remus let out an amused chuckle. “That, mate, is young love blossoming.”
Sirius gagged, which was the reaction Remus anticipated, wording his phrase that way. “Prongs and that snake?”
“Blimey, you are bloody clueless.”
James had managed to catch up to you before you could turn and see the dungeons common room. Grabbing you by your wrist and pulling you back so you could face him, he called out your name again but your heart was too loud.
“Can you stop running away?” he asked, barely raising his voice. “What’s wrong?”
You turn at him, glaring. Tugging at your wrist to free it but he was not letting you go, you let out an exhausted groan and you only paused when a look of worry painted itself over his features as he watch you struggle out of his grasp.
“____?” he called out, his voice impossibly soft when saying your name that it almost made your knees buckle.
You blink at me. “Say you hate me,” you tell him and you wanted so badly for it to also be echoed in his head.
“What?” he couldn’t explain your actions and it was worrying him beyond belief. You could almost feel your eye twitch at him.
“Say you hate me,” you tug at your wrist, “and mean it, Potter. Fucking say you hate my guts, and also think it in that thick skull of yours.”
“Merlin, ____,” James sounded desperate. “What is going on with you? Lost your wits after N.E.W.T.s?”
You felt unbelievably angry at this moment but it was more directed at yourself than him. Though he thought it was aimed at him, so he threaded carefully. Slowly letting go of your wrist and it dropped limply at your side.
“Yeah, Potter, totally went nuts after the exams so I’m demanding you express your hatred for me,” you remark sarcastically, he did not appreciate it one bit. “Just say it.”
“No,” James replied right away sternly. “You are losing it.”
“How can I not?” You point angrily at him.
“____ - “
“You say one thing and you think another,” there was no going back now as the tears welled up in your eyes, all his confusion left him and all that was left was worry. “I can hear you, your thoughts.”
All the words he knew left him. Jaw slackened, he remained standing in front of you, unable to say anything. All this time, you heard him - how? That doesn’t really matter, his head is now replaying every thought he had of you.
Fucking hell.
Fucking mumbling, bloody hell.
“I didn’t mean to, I know it’s your privacy and I wasn’t going to - “ you cast your eyes down, afraid to see how disgusted he’d look when he realizes what you were confessing. “I couldn’t control it.”
James allowed a beat to pass, just a pregnant pause between you two as the hall remained empty, much to both of your delights. Then finally, he found his voice. He cleared his throat, afraid his voice would crack.
“You mean - you’ve heard all my thoughts about you.”
You managed to smile despite the tension, “Yes, including wanting to snog me senseless,” you saw the smile tug at his lips. You still refused to meet his eyes, “Your mind is very loud. I couldn’t shut it out even if I wanted to.”
James surprised you by what he did next - crossing the gap between you two which you had expected to keep growing until he was impossibly out of reach. Instead he closed in on you, capturing your lips in his and he did right by his words -
You felt like he was stealing every breath away with how he kissed you like it could explain everything away. You kissed him back, finally allowing yourself to do one brave thing and confront your feelings instead of swallowing it all down.
His arm wrapped around your middle to pull you impossibly closer as he continued making your head lighter and lighter and only when you tapped in surrender did he pull away. You were heaving, breathless as you eyed him all bewildered.
“You -”
James Potter managed a smirk with swollen lips. “Snogged you senseless, didn’t I?”
“You twat.”
end. masterlist
#james fleamont potter#james potter#james potter marauders#james potter x reader#james potter imagine#marauders#marauders era#hp marauders#marauders x reader#harry potter marauders#harry potter marauders era
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𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝 || 𝐣𝐣 𝐦𝐚𝐲𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐤

pairing: jj maybank x fem!routledge!reader
tropes: 3rd person narration | sarah cameron’s pov | childhood best friends to lovers | brother’s best friend | best friend’s sister | fluff | soft boy jj
synopsis: sarah cameron meets her boyfriend’s sister for the first time, and understands what being soulmates means.
warnings: cursing, slightly mention of violence
wc: 2.9k
it’s my first time writing a character x reader (and actually writing a ff in years lmao) so i really hope this turned out well! also, i apologize for any typos or grammar errors but english is not my first language <3
song rec: about you - the 1975 ♡

“c’mon guys, time to go back. it’s starting to freeze out here.” pope said, placing his fishing rod by his side before getting up and walking towards the helm of the boat, kiara following him to keep him some company. he was right: the temperature had started to drop, and honestly he didn’t even know why the pogues decided to go fishing at the end of november.
they were all there, except for the pogue princess as they liked to call her. she was john b’s younger sister, just by one year; and even though she was definitely a pogue down to her core, she actually almost looked like a kook: she was always composed, never drank too much, never even touched a cigarette or a joint, and she worked her ass off every afternoon at the country club to help john b with the bills and to afford a few of the things she liked.
she was smart, kind, the type of girl to lighten up a room with the sound of her laughter. she was also one of the reasons why the ‘no pogue-on-pogue macking‘ rule was made: everyone kind of had a thing for her, and jj maybank was the first in line.
“i seriously regret coming, i think i’m going into hypothermia.” jj said, shuddering a little bit. yes, it was cold, but it wasn’t that cold. jj just liked to be dramatic.
“gosh, you’re such a pussy.” john b laughed, smacking his best friend behind the head. they’ve know each other for more than ten years now. they weren’t friends anymore, they were brothers. they loved and cared for each other very deeply, even if they were acting like jerks most of the time.
as pope started the engine of the hms pogue, ready to go back to the château, john b took his sweatshirt off to pass it to sarah, his new girlfriend. she was a kook, but she was different. she didn’t care about how dissimilar their lives were, she loved spending time with the pogues because they were real. they were amazing friends, they were funny and smart, and the kind of people you could have a serious conversation with. they weren’t superficial like the kooks, and she loved them for this.
she felt a little tap on her leg, catching with her vision her boyfriend’s sweater. she gave john b a smile and slid the blue piece of clothing on. “so, i’m meeting your sister for the first time today, uh. big step.” sarah joked, slightly pushing his arm.
since the first moment they started dating, john b had always talked about how he wanted her to meet his sister. she was the most important person in his life, especially after his dad went missing at sea during a storm. he actually wanted sarah to meet her right away, but she asked him to wait a couple of months, just to see if they were solid about this relationship. “yup, and trust me you’re gonna love her. she’s like a little ball of sunshine, she wouldn’t even hurt a fly.” he said, smiling at the thought how of sweet his sister was with everyone.
“he’s right. i don’t think i’ve even ever seen her mad.” jj stated, shifting his seat from john b’s right to sarah’s left.
“she seems really nice, but i’m not worried about me liking her, because, by what you guys always say about her, i already do. i’m just worried she won’t like me, you know because of the whole pogue-kook thing.”
everyone bursted out laughing at sarah’s words, her face more confused than ever. “what? what did I say?” kiara left pope at the helm of the boat, and went to sit in front of her, crossing her legs together. “you don’t need to worry about that, she doesn’t give a shit about the rivalry. trust me, she looks like she walked out of a cruise brochure. the only thing she wants is to see her brother with someone who makes him happy, which you do, so she’s totally gonna be fine with it.” sarah smiled at her words, feeling a bit more relieved now.
even though pope wasn’t seating next to them, he could still perfectly hear their conversation and see sarah’s tensed body. that’s why he decided to lighten up a bit the discussion. “you know, one time she made jj dress up as a reindeer.” he said getting out a chuckle at the memory of jj dressed as one of santa claus’s reindeers.
kiara followed him with a loud laughter “oh my god it’s true, i almost forgot it.”
sarah gave them an amazed look. she was enjoying this too much to not say anything. “okay, this is actually the funniest thing i’ve ever heard. did you had a red nose like little rudolph, too?” she said with a smirk, turning her head towards jj’s.
“oh shut up, all of you. i only did it because she asked. besides, she looked so happy when i changed into that costume. i would honestly do it again.” jj let out an involontary smile at the thought of y/n. it was like this all the time: wether he wanted it or not, the only thought of y/n made him feel like he was the happiest man on earth, even if he wasn’t. she just had that effect on him.
“god, it’s sickening how whipped you are for my sister.” john b said, mimicking a gag reflex.
jj rolled his eyes at his words. sarah switching her gaze between the two boys sitting one to her left, and the other to her right. she then stopped to look at jj. “wait- you like y/n?”
“like? hell, he loves that girl. he’s been in love with her since he was six. the random hook ups he has? that’s all for show. he only does it to not draw suspicion, since the only girl he’d like to fuck— and sorry john b— is y/n.” pope said, fully exposing his friend’s feelings.
not that jj cared anyway. everyone knew how he felt about her, he didn’t even try to deny it anymore.
“and you’re completely fine with it?“ sarah asked john b, knowing how protective he was when it came to his sister.
“i wasn’t always. first time he told me he loved her? i punched him. not my finest moment but i was kinda mad.” john b replied, slightly chuckling, reminiscing his right fist hitting jj’s jawbone. “i mean, the day before he tells me he sees her as a little sister and then that he wants to sleep with her? hell nah, i wasn’t having that.”
“and what changed your mind?”
“because it’s jj. i know my best friend, and i know how much he cares for her. i knew he was never going to hurt her, i’m actually pretty sure he would die for her.”
sarah nodded along. the look on jj’s face confirming that what john b had just said was a hundred percent true. in that moment a thought crossed her mind, making her think about how what jj and y/n must’ve been something truly special.

“bubba, we’re home.” john b shouted, as he opened the château’s door. the house was silent, except for a light melody coming from the bathroom and the sound of the shower running. “shower! be right there!” sarah heard y/n shout back, as every one of the pogues sat on the couch: her ending up between her boyfriend and kiara, next to who was seated pope; and a bit far away from them jj. she figured he left the space empty for y/n.
about ten minutes later, while the pogues were having a conversation about an upcoming party at the boneyard, a sixteen year old girl came out of the bathroom, wearing a pink sweater and long white sweatpants. white socks at her feet and long wet hair cascading down her back. she walked up to them, bending slightly to place a kiss on her brother’s cheek, and proceeding to do the same with all the others.
she then retraced her steps and stopped in front of sarah. “so you’re the reason why my brother stopped being a cranky old lady.” she smiled, offering her her right hand. “i’m y/n, it’s so nice to finally meet you.”
“sarah. it’s a pleasure to meet you too, john b’s always talking about you.” sarah replied, shaking her hand. y/n let out a small laugh, as she walked towards the end of the couch were jj was seated.
she plopped down next to him, tucking her legs under her bottom and leaning into him. he wrapped his arm around her, pulling her closer and gently leaving a kiss to the side of her head. “he’s always talking about you too. i swear the other night he woke me up around 3am just to tell me how amazing your date was. which, don’t get me wrong, i was very happy to hear about.”
“you literally throw a pillow in my face.” john b said.
“duh, because you woke me at 3 fucking a.m. i love you bird, but for gods sakes let a girl sleep.” she replied, making everyone laugh at her comment.
the conversation resumed pretty quickly, this time through with jj paying way less attention to it, more focused on the girl next to him.
the entire evening, between laughters and bottles of beers, sarah observed how jj and y/n were always caught up in their whole world. jj’s hands being constantly on her body, wether it was a arm around her shoulders or his hand on her leg. they were glued to each other, sometimes even whispering between them words only they could catch.
for the second time that day, sarah thought about how jj and y/n’s bond was special, going beyond simple friendship.

it was almost two a.m. when kie and pope left, both returning to their respective houses to avoid their parents storming out on them. sarah instead was going to spend the night there, so since jj and john b were on the front porch smoking a joint, obviously a jj’s idea, she and y/n were the only two people moving around the living room, cleaning up the mess of empty beer bottles and pizza boxes.
the whole night she noticed how jj and y/n acted around each other, so since they were now alone, she just felt like she had to ask. “so what’s the deal between you and jj?”
“there’s no deal, we’re friends.” y/n said calmly.
“bullshit, i noticed the way you look at him and how he looks at you. that’s the look of love, sweetie.” sarah decided not to mention how jj actually felt about her. it wasn’t her place to say tell the truth.
“nah, jj would never go for someone like me. he only sees me as a little sister, besides i’m not even his type.” she replied, giving her a kind smile, even though she felt like a lump was stuck right down her throat. y/n always knew she wasn’t the kind of girl jj would want, the were total polar opposites, and truthfully she never even considered herself that much beautiful to have a chance with him.
“since when jj has a type? doesn’t he hits on every breathing human being?” sarah knew this probably wasn’t the right thing to say, but sometimes people needed a little push to blurt out their feelings. to her surprise though, y/n laughed, most likely because she knew how their friend had a habit of flirting with almost every girl he met. it didn’t matter if they were pogues or tourons, or hell even kooks sometimes. a pretty girl is a pretty girl, doesn’t matter where she comes from.
“kinda, but he always hooks up with victoria-secrets-models type of girls, if you get what i mean. and apart from that, we want different things. he doesn’t do relationships and i don’t do random hook ups. not to mention how the possibility of me and jj being together would probably give an aneurysm to my brother.”
“eh, i wouldn’t be so sure about that, ya know. either way though, you like him, don’t you?“ sarah said, remembering the conversation she and the other guys had on the boat.
busted. y/n stayed silent, sailing her lips in a thin, straight line. she then closed her eyes and took a deep breath, getting ready to spill everything out. she figured it was time to tell the truth anyway, since sarah clearly figured everything out.
“i met jj when i was four, we were in kindergarten and some older boys were picking on me. i was smaller and basically on the edge of tears, until i saw this blonde boy running towards me and putting himself between us. even if he was younger than them he still took my defense. after that he walked me home and told me he was a friend of john b’s. since that day, i don’t think i’ve ever liked someone that wasn’t him.“
she took a small pause, just to catch her breath. but she was so caught up in narrating the whole story, that she didn’t notice john b and jj leaning against the doorframe.
jj’s eyes almost bursting out of his face at her words, not expecting to hear her confession. john b, very aware of how his best friend was going to lose his shit any minute now, he places his finger against his mouth, mimicking him to shut up.
“as we grew older the roles kinda reversed and i started to look out for him: when he would come here bruised because of his father i would hug him and clean him up; even if younger than him i helped him study, you know just avoiding he would fail some subjects. at night, dad used to let him sleep next to me or john b because he didn’t want to be alone, thing that of course dad prohibited when i turned twelve. that didn’t stop him though: he would sneak out as soon as john b would fall asleep and come under the covers with me.”
she let out a laugh. “would sir. freud love this? probably yes, but it doesn’t matter. he deserves someone that cares for him, everyone does. and it’s not pity or mercy, i genuinely want to be there for him, because he deserves the best. yet, because of his father he’s convinced he’s worthless, but he’s not. gosh, he’s so funny and smart, which i know sounds weird but he is. he would die for his friends and cares so much for us. and i’m sure he could make it out of obx if only he wanted to. and he’s always so supportive and gen-“
she could’ve kept going on, but she suddenly noticed the two boys staring right up at her. jj’s eyes were watery, like he was going to cry any second now. he didn’t cry much, only when really fucked up things happened in his life, but for the first time he felt like crying not because he was sad and tired but because he was happy. because finally he could’ve had something great going on in his life. he could’ve had her.
without saying anything he launched himself into y/n’s arms, letting her stumble back due to the rushed impact between their bodies. he hold her tight, his arms around her waist and hers around his neck. his face placed in the space between her shoulder and her neck, breathing in the smell of the coconut soap she always used. he didn’t care about sarah and john b still being in the room, he wouldn’t even care if a freaking zebra walked in the house. she was the only thing that mattered. she was his whole universe.
“you shouldn’t eavesdrop, maybank.” she said with a smirk, putting a bit of distance between their bodies so she could look at him in the face, but still managing to play with the of hair at the nape of his neck.
“did you actually mean it? like for real?”
“every word, jay. you know me, i would never lie to you.”
jj maybank was impulsive. half of the time he never thought before acting, which pretty much resulted in him dealing with the aftermath of his stupid decisions. that’s why he didn’t think twice in grabbing y/n’s face with his hands, pressing his lips against hers.
at first he felt her stiffening, probably surprised by his gesture, and for a moment he really thought he had just screwed everything up. but then her hands went to his shirt, yanking him even closer if possible, and he sensed her relaxing, her lips moving against his.
after what seemed like hours, he pulled back, only because they both needed air. if it was up to him, he would’ve spent hours kissing her without getting a break.
“i’ve been loving you for a long time, princess.” she smiled, her cheeks almost hurting because of all the happiness she was feeling.
“well, you’re very lucky then, because i’ve been loving you for a long time too.”
“i can’t watch this, i think i’m gonna throw up.”
sarah nudged her elbow into her boyfriend stomach, giving him a look that said ‘shut the fuck up or i’m killing you’. john b raised his hands in the air, admitting defeat.
and, as they watched jj starting to kiss y/n again, sarah thought of how her own relationship was truly amazing. but in her opinion? what y/n and jj had was the true definition of soulmates.
#outer banks#obx#jj obx#jj outer banks#jj x y/n#jj x you#jj x reader#jj maybank#jj fluff#fanfic#wattpad#ao3 fanfic#one shot#obx2#obx1#jj mayback x reader#jj mayback imagine#jj imagine#jj maybank fluff#jj maybank obx#jj maybank x reader#jj maybank x you#jj maybank x y/n
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chapter one: twists and turns - ln.4



summary: lando norris was a preppy asshole in secondary school, and you were the girl he despised. years later, you're a hot-shot sports lawyer rewriting the rules of the sport he calls home, and your paths cross, whether you want them to or not.
pairing: lando norris x fem! lawyer! reader
a/n: anything in orange and bold is the past
𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟𓆝
Lando stared at his alarm clock, waiting for it to go off in exactly one minute. He loved his off-season, but hated getting back into training. It made everything ten times harder, he was ten times more tired, and he had no more me-time.
Wales was nice, he thought, but after his exhausting day of test after test, all he really wanted was to be back in Monaco and somehow convince Max F to come over. He sat in his hotel room and felt that same pang of loneliness he’d been working his whole life to subdue. That feeling that settled itself deep in his chest and didn’t come out until he was with his friends or his family. He liked being with people, he was a people-person, but he also wanted something deeper. Something fulfilling. He looked out the window, Swansea was pretty beautiful, actually. The water was calm and the moon reflected off it, making it all look a bit more cinematic than it did during the day. His phone buzzed and he reached over his bed to grab it.
Zak B: We need you back in Monaco tomorrow for a pretty exciting meeting 😃. See you there!
He groaned into his pillow. He was getting slightly disillusioned with F1. He had no chance if he didn’t win it this year, and no excuses. He just wanted the season to start already so he could get on with himself and prove that he learnt from everything last year. One chance. One more chance, or McLaren would drop him.
𓆝 𓆟
He wasn’t sure what he was expecting when he walked into a Law firm, but it wasn’t this. His lawyers were all suit and tie-wearing, stuck up, and slightly pompous. This place seemed pretty fun to be honest. There were notice boards up for ‘trainee-activities’, free seminars on cool shit, and it was in the mountains, overlooking all of Monté-Carlo.
“This way please,” a young woman directed him to a long board room, where half the grid already sat, with a large number of older drivers too, and all the current team principals, with some oldies as well. He sat between Max and Jenson, greeting them both.
“What’s this about?” He turned to Jenson. He just shrugged and smiled.
“Not sure, just got invited, said it was important,” he explained.
Lando looked across the table at Oscar, who had definitely just rolled out of bed. He kicked him under the table, and brought him to full attention.
“Ouch,” Oscar deadpanned, kicking Lando’s foot back. “What?”
Lando smirked, watching Oscar's reaction. “What’s all this about?”
He shrugged. “Andrea just sent me a text.”
Suddenly, another door opened and 4 people stepped out, but he couldn’t really make out who they were, but the room went silent anyway. One of them turned around and looked, smiling at some of the drivers, then turned back and sent more hushed whispers to his colleagues.
Another one turned around, smiling at the group. “You’re almost all here, so I guess we’ll get started,” he announced and all eyes were curiously watching him. “We know we’ve been pretty secretive about what this meeting is about, but trust us, we think you’ll be happy to know that it’s about the rules of F1.”
And then you turned around, and Lando’s world was flipped on its side. His eyes probably shot out of his head like a cartoon character, so much so that Oscar gave him a weird look. But he didn’t look at Oscar, he couldn’t. Not when you were right in front of him for the first time in years.
“I’m Dr. Y/l/n,” you smiled. “This is Mr. Davidson, Ms. Riley, and Ms. Ray, my associates. I’m an expert in sports law, and Mr. Davidson here is my trainee. I’ve worked especially in Rugby and Rally Racing law, as have my three colleagues here, and we are here to speak to you about making the rules of F1, and motorsport in general, a lot more fair for the drivers and governing body,” you explained. “Any questions before we get started?”
Everyone was quiet, and Lando was too busy looking at you to notice the question.
“Great,” you smiled at the table. “I’ll let Mr. Davidson take it away,” you turned to him, and for a split second- Lando swore up and down- he saw him smirk at you. Lando wasn’t listening to the rule changes you all wanted to make, he was too busy watching you shuffle through papers and add notes as Mr.Davidson spoke. He had a scowl plastered on his face from the second that man opened his mouth. Yet, you stood there, laughing at his stupid law puns, helping him out when he got lost, and adding in bits he clearly had forgotten. You’d changed, clearly. Lando could remember doing a group project with you, back in Year 8, you were a fucking dictator. If he spelt one word wrong, misused one comma, you’d find it and berate him. The scowl only deepened.
“And now moving on to why we’re doing this. We asked the FIA about changing to a law-like system, and they were strongly against it, but we went to the owner of F1, Mr. Domenicali, and he agreed this needed to happen. We’re working with the FIA here, so don’t expect everything to turn out just perfect, I’m sure they’ll still be difficult to work with, but we want to get as close to fair as we can. Now, we’re handing out pages of paper to everyone at the table and we want your opinions on the rules right now, write specific rules that need changing and how you’d change them, give us your opinions on the system in place now and how we can fix them, we want as much input as possible,” you smiled to the group as the others handed out pages of paper and pens to everyone. George, of course, began writing a novel on his page. Oscar jotted down some ideas. Jenson wrote about 10 words. Lando just stared at his page. Then wrote:
Call me. XXX XXX XXX
And he held his paper up to be collected like he was in school. He saw how reluctant you were to grab his paper, but you took it anyway.
You were less than impressed to see what he’d written and he could see it on your face. You looked at him for the first time, and all he did was smirk back and wave. You crumpled up his page and handed him a new sheet of paper.
He was happy with himself. He missed this, these secret moments between you two, the ones that made him feel better about himself. He liked how no one saw, and no one noticed. He liked that it was just you and him, and nothing could change that.
𓆝 𓆟
“What’s with you and Dr. Y/l/n?” Oscar mused as they sat in the lobby, waiting to be given their ‘buddy’.
Lando stared back at him. “What do you mean?” Oscar was like… the least socially conscious person he'd ever known, surely he wasn’t being that obvious, right?
Oscar raised an eyebrow. “Do you think I’m fucking blind mate?”
Lando shrugged with a hopeful smirk. “Yes?”
“Dude, come on. How do you know her?”
“School,” he relieved. “But it’s not like we were friends. We just… knew each other.”
Oscar nodded, satisfied with his answer. If only he knew how complicated it really was.
ᆺᆺᆺᆺᆺᆺᆺᆺᆺᆺᆺᆺᆺ
“This is Y/n Y/l/n, she’s new in school, please show her around,” the Principal, Ms. Browne smiled at Lando. “Your parents know each other, correct?”
In the loosest sense of the term, Lando thought. He knew who you were, he’d seen you at some parties his parents had dragged him to. You were like every other girl at the school, a prim, proper, prickly, princess. At least, that’s what his brain told him, because he’d literally rather do algebra than show the new girl around the school.
You answered for him. “We do, yes. Thank you Miss.”
You were so polite. So polished. It pissed him off, and he couldn’t even tell why. He rolled his eyes and slid off his chair, mumbling a small “Come on, princess,” as he showed you to the door.
You left the principal’s office behind him, carrying your books. He was short for his age, and he still sounded a bit young for his age, but you didn’t really mind. You knew he was into racing, and your dad followed his career more than he followed your life, so you hated him already. His rudeness and stand-offish behaviour just added fuel to the flames.
“So, you’d you move here?” he asked, though he was clearly uninterested in the answer.
“Work,” you answered simply. He nodded.
“You sing, right?” he asked and you nodded. “What show are you doing?”
“Into the Woods.”
“Have you done it before?” he asked because… well he wanted you to keep talking. He didn’t want some awkward silence he’d have to fill with his own opinions and life, because there wasn’t much there. He wasn’t super into musicals (by any means), but he knew who you were, specifically because his mum was always raving about you to him. You were her friend's daughter, and you were apparently the next Broadway talent. He knew who you were. He knew every show you’d ever been in, mostly because his mum dragged him along when he wasn’t racing.
“Nope,” you shook your head. “But it’s pretty simple.”
He nodded. “Alright, well, this is your dorm block. You have a map, and I am no longer needed. Goodbye,” he said, before walking back across the campus to his own dorm. His friends were much too happy to know how it went, walking the new girl around the school, it would’ve been cool if it were anyone but you.
So he just put their gossip to bed by calling you socially awkward and boring.
ᆺᆺᆺᆺᆺᆺᆺᆺᆺᆺᆺᆺᆺ
“Mr. Norris, you’ll be with Mr. Davidson over here,” Sierra, Oscar’s trainee explained. Mr. Davidson sat opposite him with a smile.
He lifted his hand to shake it. “Call me Liam,” He had a firm handshake, fucking hell. “I’m really excited to be working with you on this. I think you’re a brilliant driver.”
Just then, Lando caught sight of you over his shoulder and again, all his attention went straight to you. Liam stared at him for a second. “Everything alright?” he asked.
Lando nodded, his eyes trained on you as you gathered your things, he noticed the way your shirt clung to your body, the way your hair fell, the way your slacks were tight in all the right places. You were perfect. “Who’s Y/n going with?” he asked, without even thinking.
Liam looked even more confused. “I didn’t you two know each other, small world, eh?” he questioned, chuckling. “And she’s taking the team bosses and some retired drivers. She’ll be at the same amount of races as us though, so you'll get time to catch up-”
“I want her,” he stated, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms. “Her or I’m not doing it.”
Liam’s face fell, and Lando counted it as a personal win. Oscar covered his face with his hands, embarrassed by his teammates' antics. “Umm, I’ll have to go talk to her about that-”
“Go. I’ll wait,” Lando smiled, looking every bit the aggressor he was being. He looked smug.
Liam got up and went into a room (what he assumed to be your office), and a few seconds later came out telling him to go in.
He opened the door and popped his head in. There you were, sitting at a desk behind a large screen, glasses perched dangerously close to falling off your nose. You stopped your vicious typing to look up at him expectantly. “This a good time?” he smirked. You were scowling. You rolled your eyes and went back to your furious typing as he sat down. He looked around your office. Your diplomas on the walls, pictures of you at various events and charity fundraisers, pictures of you and your team (Liam was right beside you in every single one, but he let it slide for a moment). You had a whole life he’d known nothing about. A subtle ache settled itself in his chest as a sort of… guilt blossomed. You had a whole life he knew nothing about, and he had no one to blame but himself-
“What the fuck is your problem?” you demanded, turning your attention to him.
He chuckled. “That wasn’t very professional.”
“Lando,” you groaned, regaining your professionalism. “What do you want from me? I didn’t choose this job, I got chosen for the role. I’m managing a team of more than 50 people alone, while doing my duties to speak to all the team bosses and take some work off the plates of my employees. I cannot possibly also talk to you every few days about your experiences with the FIA and the rules,” you huffed. “You have Liam, he’s a great lawyer, trust me.”
Lando’s mood soured at your casual use of his first name. “Then I won’t do it.”
You sighed. “You’re only doing yourself a disservice by not doing it, but we can’t force you,” you went back to your typing for a moment. “Close the door on your way out and send Liam in, will you?”
Reluctantly, he got up and left you to your typing. He knew you needed his opinion, he was one of the other drivers most heavily penalised last year.
“I’ll wait here,” Lando nodded as Liam went back into your office.
But he made a mistake. He didn’t close the door after him.
“You two know each other?” Liams asked. You sighed.
“Not really, just in passing.” Lie. “He doesn't want to do it, He doesn’t have to.”
“We need his opinion though,” he sighed. “I know he sucks but… we need him.”
“Well I don’t have the time, Liam. I don’t have the time anymore. He’s just trying to rile me up-”
“Maybe I could take the retired drivers off you and you could just do the team bosses and Norris?” Liam offered.
You were silent for a moment. Then groaned. “I really don’t want to.”
Liam chuckled. “Well, we all have to do things we don't want to do, Princess.”
Lando saw red, but listened further.
“I guess you’re right. Tell him I’ll see him in Australia.”
“Alrighty, thanks boss.”
Australia. Right.
𓆝 𓆟
Pole position, shitty weather, and a win anyway. Good weekend.
He brushed you off as the celebrations started, but when he saw you chatting with some of his engineers, gathering information, he knew he should speak to you. He was pulled away by the media before he could, and you ended up sending Sierra to do his post-race breakdown. You’d already felt for Monaco.
Shit.
𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟
twists and turns masterlist
navigation for my blog :)
#female reader#x reader insert#x reader fic#x reader fluff#x reader fanfiction#fem reader#lando norris x you#lando norris x reader#lando norris#f1 x reader#formula one imagine#formula 1 x you#formula one x reader#formula one#f1 imagine#f1 fluff#formula 1#mclaren#lando norris x reader angst#ln4#lando x reader#f1 2024#lando norris fluff#lando norris imagine#lando norris x y/n#f1 fanfic#f1 angst#lando norris fanfic#mclaren f1
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Can I request establish relationship with The Void (reader is also dating Bob) where it’s like, soft moments Void has with sunshine reader, please and thank you!!
#1
‘You trust in those belligerent fools continues to baffle me.’ The Void says as he watched Walker, Yelena, Ava and Alexi with suspicion and skepticism. He knew your heart was pure as gold, much like Bob’s which was one of the main reasons for your relationship being as beautiful and effortlessly filled with light and life, you both held similar values then you and The void did.
And yet you loved The Void all the same as you saw no point loving one part of a man without loving his darkness also, something The Void had once said you were extremely foolish for before finding himself where he was currently in being cuddled up in your arms, with you running your fingers through his hair and giving him kisses on occasions.
‘I can’t help it, they’ve saved me more times I can count.’ You replied softly, keenly aware of Void’s protectiveness over you with how hesitant he was to allow you closer contact with the Thunderbolts, not for any particular reason other then they were getting too close to what was his and Bob’s. The Void acted like your second shadow, always lurking close by, making sure that the message was clear to anyone who seemingly didn’t get it the first time; you were off limits and were not to be taken away from him should they wish a reckoning unlike another, and thankfully many understood when when they were biting off more then they could chew with The Void and left you both be for the majority.
‘Are you saying my protection isn’t enough?’ The void asked and you were quick to press a kiss to where you believed his cheek to be, his form was a hard one to navigate but after countlessly tracing your fingers across bob’s face, you believed yourself to be well aware enough to know where your kisses landed on The Void as his white pinprick eyes watched you unsettlingly.
‘I’m never saying that silly.’ You told him as you pressed another kiss to his cheek. ‘Your protecting of me is sweet and reminds me of that of dragons of fantasy books and movies I would always watch, ones where they’d fiercely protect their horde of gold and other riches with fire and annihilation.’ you add as you felt Void shuffle himself further into your arms, wanting to hear more of your words while hogging your warmth that seemed to be the only thing calm him down whenever one of the Thunderbolts step out of line in his eyes.
'Do you like these horde obsessed dragons who'd go to war for what's theirs?' The Void asked, his white pinprick eyes looking deeply into your own, much like two stars in the night that were for you and only you. While others might find them unsettiling and creepy, like they're being seen through and being disected to their foundations, yet to you it was anything but those things knowing that this powerful being was more then willing to wage war to keep you with him.
'i do.' you replied as you press your forehead against his, feeling nothing but protected, safe and weridly at ease because you knew that while you were within the presence of the Void, you could feel Bob with you as you felt Void raise his hand and caress your face with gentleness as you melted into hi touch with a smile.
'It makes me feel special, like i'm worth hoarding and keeping out of the hands of others, even if some people see it in a possessive light.' you added, knowing that many people saw your relationsip with The Void as posessive, but to you it was one where he did everything in his power to keep you safe and show a side of himself that went against everything you thought you knew about him. Yet you didn't mind it one bit as you knew that The Void was more then originally conceived, especially when he's nothing more then putty in your hand and asking deep and thought provoking questions.
Void brings his other hand to hold your other cheek softly as though he was handeling a feather, something delicate that he knew he shouldn't use his full strength on, unless he wishes to destroy that delicate feather entierly. 'Then i shall strive to keep you as protected, as safe within my care as i can and will wage war should i ever find that you were ever hurt or brought to harm, for i cannot exisit without my light to my darkness as we are equal beings on par with no one but each other.' Void finished as he kisses your eyelids, forehead and brim of your nose before snatching a final kiss ffom your lips, making you smile against his lips.
'sap.' you muttered playfully.
'only for you my light.' Void responded without heistation.
#2
'do i scare you?' Void asks.
You furrowed your brows as you looked at him, sure you had been made aware of the type of being the Void was by Bob, but now that you were seeing him yourself your feelings hasn't changed much regarding him.
'No.' you replied as you moved over towards him, reaching out to hold his face, pausing briefly when it seemed as though The Void flinched before allowing you to hold his face, letting out a sigh he seemed to have been holding ever since asking the question. 'why? should i be afraid of you?'
'No.' The Void anwsered as though your questioned had personally hurt him.
'Do you want me to be afraid of you?' you continued to ask, wanting to know why he was thinking like this, what was the reason behind it and considering how The Void usually holds himself, this only made you worry that something had gotten under his skin.
'Never.' The Void steps closer to you, hands holding you in place by the small of your back, making sure you were always within reach of him and never too close where he felt as though you'd feel suffocated.
'Then why ask if you knew the answer all along?' you spoke softly as your thumbs caress his cheeks while you tried to look for the anwsers you seeked within his pinprick eyes that reminded you of two lonely stars, together yet so isolated within the mass expanse of darkness, only within the company of the other for all time always; but there was beauty in that and you liked to think that you and Bob/The Void were those pinpricks that make up his eyes.
'For the reason why any other human would ask such questions, fear of one day that those fears will be realised and used against me.' Void tells you as he reassures himself in your existence by focusing on your hands upon his face and you just being in front of him, focusing on your breathing and the calm that you brought him as the fog within his head slowly disipates and gives way to clarity and content.
'i'd be more scared for the people who wronged you, the people who overstep the line with you, and those who were too confident that they could ever harm you.' You tell him as he remained silent and still as an unmoving shadow, waiting for you to say more should there be more for you to say, displaying his unwavering patience towards you.
'i could never be scared of your power when you use it to keep me safe, to keep me secure becuase the day i'm scared of you is the day i know i have lost the man i love forever.' You brings your hands down to his shoulders and massage the tenseness you felt there at a slow pace, encourging him to unclench his jaw and relax his shoulders for he was in no situation where he should feel on edge, or backed into a corner for that matter.
'And i have never yet felt that way and i know i never will. because i love you so blindingly, so unwaveringly that no matter what happens to us there will always still be an us when the dust settles.' you finished just as his shoulders fully give way and relax under your touch, his hands on the small of your waist tightening their grip before easing slightly as though he was checking that you were real, that you were here with him to calm him and reassure him that you could never seen him as anything but your protector and safehaven.
The Void tugs you closer to him until you were flush to his chest as his hands grew bored of being stationary and began to rub up and down your back. 'You took the words right out of my mouth my love, thank you for being the calm to my chaos, the peace to my destruction, but now it's time for rest don't you think?'
You smiled as you kissed his jaw. 'As long as you're there with me.' you said.
'of course.' The Void says softly as he leads you to bed, where he holds you closely for the duration of the night.
#sentry imagine#sentry imagines#sentry x you#sentry x reader#thunderbolts*#thunderbolts#bob reynolds imagine#bob reynolds x you#bob reynolds x reader#Bob Reynolds imagines#mcu x y/n#mcu x you#mcu x reader#mcu imagine#mcu imagines#mcu drabble#marvel x you#marvel x reader#marvel imagine#marvel imagines#marvel fanfiction#marvel x y/n#the void x reader#the void imagines#the void imagine
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Grid Mum 3 | MV1
Pairing: Max Verstappen x Reader
Summary: Triple headers are tiring, especially when you have to take care of both your boyfriend and your grid kids.
Author's Note: okayy ig grid mum is officially a series now haha i fr never would've thought that I'd write anything else than one-shots but I've been surprisingly enjoying it + the love y'all are giving is insane so thank you sm for the support🤍🤍
F1 MASTERLIST🏎 | Previous Part | Next Part
Although you weren’t the one racing, triple headers were more exhausting than you remembered.
It was one thing to just accompany your boyfriend. But it was another to also have to take care of six other people.
First, there was Japan.
Thankfully, there had been the break after China; but when you had arrived in Japan alongside Max, Jack, and Liam, the other rookies had swarmed you. From Kimi asking why he wasn’t invited to fly on Max’s jet – “you were literally in Italy for school”, you had replied – to Gabriel complaining that you were playing favourites, you were definitely not catching a break anytime soon.
So you now had to make sure that everyone managed to get time with you – and Max, although the rookies cared more about you than your boyfriend – each weekend and started organising your own race schedule. You tried your best to equally split your time between the six of them, and asked them to make an effort as well. They couldn’t expect you to always only spend one-on-one time with them, so they agreed to hang out with you in duos or trios. Your main argument had been that this way, they could even see you multiple times during the weekend and that’s how you then easily convinced them.
You had spent half of Friday with Jack, who had been replaced by Alpine’s reserve driver – Ryo Hirakawa – for FP1. Then, after FP2 was Isack and Liam’s turn. They had both managed to get into the top ten during the practice, so you decided to take them out after their work day was over.
“Is it okay with you two if Max isn’t here?” You eventually asked them, as you were nearing the paddock’s exit.
“Because he was supposed to be here?” Liam wondered. “I thought you were the one we were spending the evening with.”
“Well, yes.” You let out a chuckle at Liam’s assumption. “It was the plan indeed, but I just felt like telling you in case you had expected him to come too.”
“Trust me, we’re perfectly fine with only you. We see Max way too often anyways”, Isack added.
“I swear”, you agreed with a laugh. “That man is everywhere, it’s crazy.”
“Plus, his team isn’t really that good. Racing Bulls is better, right?” Isack teased.
“Totally agree. Red Bull is mid, honestly. I mean, you both did better than him in FP2 so I’m with the real champions right now.”
Liam and Isack both knew that you were joking, as Max was obviously a better driver than them, but they liked that you were still supporting their small victories in Red Bull’s sister team. They had heard from the other rookies about your hatred slight dislike of Max’s team, but it was still unexpected to actually hear you talk about it.
“But I’m for real proud of you both, you know.” Your tone was now a bit more serious, to show them that you were being genuine. “You boys are rookies and it’s your first full season in F1; so compared to your first race, I know you’re already improving and you’ll achieve great things in the future.”
You meant every word. Simply from the fact that they were part of the world’s twenty best drivers, you were certain of their bright future. They had both earned their seats, and nothing would ever take that away.
You thought of the first race of the season, not even a month ago. They had unfortunately both DNFed the race. You remembered leaving the Red Bull garage back then, making your way to the Racing Bulls one after Isack had to give up his first F1 race during the formation lap. You had seen on the cameras that Lewis’s dad had found him on his way back to the paddock and had consoled him, which you also did when Isack eventually reached the Racing Bulls location. You hadn’t hesitated one second to offer him a loving hug, which he had reciprocated as you rubbed his back before letting him go to his family while you went back to Red Bull. Way later in the race, Liam had also been a victim of the rain and you had offered your support to him as well.
And now, you were able to see their improvement. Even though Liam had been demoted back to Racing Bulls, you felt that he was more comfortable there. He and Isack made a good duo, which seemed to benefit them both as you observed their new dynamic during the rest of the day.
Two happy rookies for now, four left.
…..
For this one, you left the other rookies no choice but to accept that you would solely be focusing on Jack. He was definitely not having the best weekend for now: replaced in FP1, he only had two sessions to test the car in Suzuka before qualifying. However, an unlucky DRS issue had led him to crash into the barriers during FP2 which meant that he only had FP3 left to make the most of the car.
He had understood your absence yesterday after FP2, when you had sent him a supportive message and offered him to spend Saturday morning with you. So now here you were, having breakfast with Jack before FP3 was to happen. Fortunately, he had confirmed to you that he was physically fine after his crash from the day before even though he could be feeling better mentally, and told you that the car had been fixed for him to drive today.
“Please, always remember that you are more important than the car. Alpine can make another one, but I don’t think your parents could remake you.”
“I know…” he replied. “I just– I still need to prove myself out there. I have Franco’s fans after me, and four fucking reserve drivers waiting for me to slip up. I can’t afford to fail after everything I did.”
“Jack, we’re only on race three. Out of twenty-four,” you reminded him. “I know the pressure is insane right now, but you know your worth – I know your worth. It’s not abnormal that you’re here, racing at the pinnacle of motorsports. You’ve been chosen because you deserve the seat, and even shitty Alpine knows that you’re capable of succeeding.”
Jack stayed silent for a couple minutes, taking in your words.
“Thanks… it means a lot to me. My whole family is behind me, my friends too; but they obviously support me because of our relationships.” He pondered on how to word his next train of thought. “But you, well… you’re not forced to have this opinion of me. So, it’s really worth a lot to know what you think.”
Jack could have cried. You knew he would have. But he still wanted to be strong, especially with you there as you had this high opinion of him. You weren’t giving him the same pressure that he felt everytime he stepped foot in the Alpine car. No, this was good pressure. He wanted to impress you, and the best thing about it? He knew that you would never hold it against him, and never be disappointed with his results.
The rest of your breakfast was spent in a light-hearted atmosphere, before it was time for you both to go to the track. Jack would be getting in the car with some weight off his shoulders, all thanks to you, and he eventually managed to be P14 despite the little amount of time he’d had in the car this weekend.
…..
Qualifying had been the easiest moment for you to split your time between the rookies. You had first begun to watch Q1 in Max’s garage – turns out he had slightly been jealous of you playing grid mum to the rookies and thought that you hadn’t spent enough time in girlfriend mode – before making your way through the other garages depending on who would not take part in the next session.
Both Jack and Gabriel had been eliminated in Q1, so here you were with them at Alpine. The three of you were watching Q2 together, and sharing opinions on who had the best shot at getting pole for tomorrow’s race. Your bet was – obviously unbiased – on Max while the two rookies were thinking that either McLaren would get it, given that Lando and Oscar had both topped the practice sessions.
Not long after, you were joined by Liam who had ended up P14. You had texted him about your whereabouts when you saw on TV that he was out in Q2, offering him to come spend the remaining time of the qualifying session with you and the two other rookies. Safe to say, he had wasted no time in reaching your location after a brief exchange with his team and one quick interview – actual debriefs wouldn’t happen until after qualifying ended as a whole, so he was in the clear to wander around until then.
You congratulated him on his performance in the Racing Bulls car, and asked him if he wanted to take part in your betting pole pool. None of you had put actual money whatsoever on the driver you each had chosen, the prize simply being some bragging rights over the others. It was all done in a friendly atmosphere as the four of you then spent the rest of Q3 together, and got a couple looks as people wondered about your weird little family hanging out in Alpine when only one driver was actually part of the team.
…..
When qualifying was over, you waited for your boyfriend to come and get you. He wasn’t really thrilled with the idea of having to enter Alpine, and the both of you knew that you were taking advantage of it. Still, you agreed to meet him outside in the paddock. What you hadn’t expected though, was that behind Max were three other people. And the look on Max’s face as half of the rookies followed him to where you had been waiting for him was hilarious, you couldn’t help the laugh that escaped your mouth.
“You know you’re being stalked right now?” You teased Max when he was finally in front of you.
“Said they wanted to file a complaint,” he explained as he pointed to the three drivers behind him. “But I told them to directly speak to you, so they tagged along.”
“We do have a complaint,” Kimi confirmed. “We” – as in him, Ollie, and Isack – “feel like you’ve spent more time with the others, especially me and Ollie. Isack had yesterday with you, but still.”
Ollie nodded beside him, as a way to confirm his words.
“And I’ll agree with you.” You weren’t about to gaslight those kids and tell them that they were overreacting – they were kind of dramatic, but it was endearing. “I’ll remind you that the weekend isn’t over yet, so we still have tomorrow.”
The rookies stayed silent, waiting for you to continue, and nodded to show that they were listening. Beside you, Max was weirdly invested in the ‘drama’ as it was kind of funny how the rookies had come to like you even more than him.
“Tell you what: whoever brings me some points tomorrow, we’ll spend time together after the race. And if you’ll authorise me, I’ll celebrate my boyfriend’s pole tonight. It’s been a while since he’s been performing well, and I don’t want him to get depressed.”
The offer seemed to satisfy them, as they all agreed to those terms.
“I’m still here,” Max reminded. “I can hear you.”
“Oh, I know. Does that mean you don’t want to spend the evening with me?” You argued, raising an eyebrow at him.
“Don’t put words into my mouth.” Max sighed, but he still had that familiar smile on his face. “I’d love to spend the night with you”, he sarcastically added while sneaking an arm around your waist to pull you closer to him.
“Okay, we don’t wanna know more. We’re gonna go”, Ollie said as he grabbed Kimi’s shoulders and motioned for the other rookies to follow him.
“Max!” You exclaimed as you slapped his chest. “You traumatised our kids!”
“We could still find new ones?” He suggested.
“Not in F1, though!”
“There’s still Lando, I don’t know.” Max shrugged before he had an idea. “Or we can make our own.”
“Win tomorrow’s race and I’ll consider it”. You wouldn’t consider it, but what Max didn’t know couldn’t hurt him.
“Oh, I’ll win it alright. I just had some new extra motivation,” he bragged with a smug smile on his face before leading you away from goddamn Alpine and back to Red Bull.
…..
And the motivation did seem to have a positive impact on Max, as he had crossed the finish line in P1 – his first win since the 2024 Qatar Grand Prix. You obviously knew that Max had won all thanks to his racing talent, but he still teased you about your comment from yesterday when he went to hug you after getting out of his car.
“Have you considered ditching the kids and having our own?” He asked you in between kisses.
“Nice try, but I’ve grown too attached to them so it’s too late now.”
“Fair enough”, he replied. Max gave you one last quick kiss before going to share his win’s happiness with the rest of his team.
The joy on his face was contagious, and you couldn’t help the matching smile that appeared on your face. Max would have a tough season, but he had shown that he wouldn’t give up that easily and that he was still capable of greatness even with both McLaren against him.
Speaking of great things, you were also over the moon due to three of your grid kids managing to get points today. The ones who had gotten into Q3 yesterday had succeeded in finishing the race in the top ten – that is to say Kimi in P6, Isack in P8, and Ollie in P10. You were especially proud of Isack as he had scored his first points as an F1 driver.
So that’s why you were now collecting everyone from their respective garage. You had told Max that you would come back to Red Bull with the rookies, and he agreed to wait. He had planned to celebrate with the team tonight, but he thought that it would still be nice to spend time with you and the rookies before going out to party.
After a quick trip to Haas, Mercedes, and Racing Bulls, you had the three drivers around you and you all walked back to Red Bull where Max was waiting for you. Obviously, race talk was to be expected as soon the four drivers were reunited. So you all began to discuss today’s highlights – there weren’t that many if someone asked you, except for Alex’s radios.
“The only impressive thing about today is Max winning four times in a row here,” you stated. “Y’all didn’t really give me an interesting race.”
“But we all got points!” Kimi argued. “That’s the main achievement. And I also led the race for a while!”
“Of course, and I’m very proud of you! The race as a whole was just… very reminiscent of a certain track where nothing happens.”
“Monaco?” The rookies all wondered, to which you nodded.
“I mean, Monaco last year was actually a bit more entertaining than usual. There were a couple crashes,” Max reminded.
“Says the guy who should have brought his pillow. You’re just saying that because Charles finally won his home race.”
“God forbid a guy is happy for a friend”, Max sighed with a shrug.
Stopping in your tracks, you were left speechless. The drivers kept walking for a few seconds until they noticed that you were behind them, looking at Max like he had grown another head.
“What’s wrong?” Max asked.
“Who taught you that?” You knew the trend from spending way too much time on TikTok, but why did your boyfriend know it too?
“Gabriel and I did”, Isack proudly claimed. “Before the parade, we were just exchanging ideas for our teams’ content.”
“It’s very educational,” Max said. “Maybe I should spend more time around the youth.”
“You act like you’re fifty, mate.” Ollie’s words made you laugh. “But we can fix that tonight; teach you more about social media.”
“I feel like you’re gonna ask me to film a stupid trend at the end of the night.”
“Never”, you reassured him. “As long as you pay the bill.”
“Be careful with the headline: Max Verstappen’s girlfriend is a gold digger and forces him to pay for her at the restaurant.”
You had seen Max laugh in the years that you had been together; seen him chuckle, burst out laughing; or just a sarcastic laugh. But the one he let out at this moment after Kimi’s words, was almost one of a kind. It was the genuine laugh, the one that took over Max within a second and left him breathless.
Max put his arm around Kimi’s shoulder, and you knew at that moment that this was it: Max was as smitten as you with the rookies, and he would never let them go from now on.
…..
When you arrived at the restaurant where you had booked a table, Max had come back to linger by your side for a bit as a waitress led the rookies to the table.
“They’re great kids,” he simply stated. “Don’t think I can be apart from them now.”
“You didn’t really have a choice from the moment that you started taking them under your wing. Should’ve thought about it before you became a role model for them.”
“More like they chose me as their own”, Max clarified.
“Except for Isack.”
“Except for Isack”, Max repeated with a chuckle. “Can’t compete with Lewis on this one.”
But honestly, even if the rookies had other favourites, the bond they were creating with Max was one of a kind; and you were glad to be able to be part of it.
When you and Max reached your table, the rookies were all sitting down and already looking at the menus. They asked about what you were planning to eat, comparing who had the most similar taste to yours. They even offered to share some of their food with you, after they had seen that you had taken a few bites from Max’s plate. And only when you reached dessert, did they realise that Max was still with them.
“You’re okay just spending the evening with us?” Ollie wondered.
“Yeah, didn’t you want to celebrate with your team?” Kimi added.
Looking at Max, you were carefully awaiting his reply. You hadn’t commented on it when you saw the time pass, and he was still peacefully enjoying his meal.
“Well…” Almost nervous to have been put on the spot, Max took a few seconds before answering. “I’ve won so many races already; doesn’t hurt to skip one celebration.”
He tried to pretend like he was indifferent to this, but you knew better. And Max knew that you knew when he caught you softly smiling at him, mouthing ‘liar’.
“Or maybe you just enjoy spending time with us”, Isack jokingly suggested.
“Yeah, maybe… must be that,” Max kind of confirmed.
But it was that. Max did currently enjoy spending his evening with you and your grid kids more than he would have enjoyed going out to party with his team. And if you weren’t already completely in love with this man, then you sure as hell were now.
_________________________________________________
Then, there was Bahrain.
To avoid having jealous rookies, Max had offered them all to fly on his private jet from Japan – safe to say, no one had refused the offer. Liam and Jack didn’t hesitate to remind the others that they had done this before, a smug smile on their faces as they confidently roamed around the jet when everyone got on.
“Okay, so this is where I sat last week”, Liam proudly announced as he pointed to a seat. “Jack was right there, and–”
“Mate, shut up. We don’t need you to play tour guide”, Kimi complained.
“Yeah, we’ll be just fine without you…” Ollie added as he side eyed the Kiwi driver. He approached what Liam has described as his seat, and took it as his own. “Though, I gotta admit this one is comfortable indeed.”
“That was where I was planning to sit, Ollie. You can choose somewhere else”, Liam nicely suggested.
“Don’t see your name written there”, the Brit said as he pretended to look around.
“Oh my God… I swear I’ll run you off track,” Liam threatened with a sigh before he went to sit a couple rows behind.
“I don’t want anyone to threaten anyone, please. I won’t hesitate to leave you stranded in Japan,” you warned the rookies. “Is that clear?” Your gaze stayed longer on Liam and Ollie than on the others, hoping that they would get the message.
“Yes Mum,” they all replied in unison. Their tone was definitely sarcastic, as a few of them rolled their eyes along with a smile.
“Be careful with how you speak to her,” Max told the rookies as he went to stand beside you. “You’re on my jet, you respect my girl.”
“We’re being respectful!” Kimi claimed, to which the other rookies nodded.
“Suddenly, you’re all getting along when it’s to be united against us. I don’t know if that’s a good thing, though.” You sat down across Ollie, getting comfortable. “Everyone sit please, I think we’re taking off soon.”
“Yeah, buckle up kids.” Max motioned for the rookies to find a seat, before he confirmed to the cabin crew that they were good to go.
The flight would be a long one like the previous week when you flew to Japan, so you really hoped that you could manage to keep everyone entertained. It honestly didn’t take long for all the drivers – Max included – to find something to do, and you were glad to be able to do your own thing.
You always brought a couple books with you when you were accompanying Max to his races, as you could take advantage of the numerous flights done throughout the season to at least finish several series in a short amount of time. So as usual, you were pulling out your current book and looked forward to finishing it. Last time you had paused your crime novel, you were in the middle of the investigation and making crazy theories – that you sometimes annoyed Maw with – about who the killer could be.
…..
An hour later, you were finally closing your book and putting it down on your lap. Similar to most of the crime novels you would read, you hadn’t predicted who the murderer had been even though it was making so much sense when the detective explained it.
While you unlocked your phone to add your finished book to Goodreads, you could feel a gaze on you. And when you looked up from your phone a couple minutes later, your eyes met Kimi’s. You gave him a smile, silently asking if he needed anything. He took that as a sign to stand up and walk up to you, his face showing some stress.
“Can I bother you with something?” He shyly asked, afraid that he was disturbing your peace. He had waited for you to finish your book before even having the nerves to come up to you.
“Of course, Kimi. How can I help?”
“Are you good at maths?”
“Maths?” You repeated. Kimi nodded and you thought for a second. “I think I can manage high school level, yeah. Want me to look at it?”
The bright smile that made its way on Kimi’s face was almost enough to blind you. He was so relieved at your positive reaction, and he immediately handed you his textbook.
“Take my seat, Kimi.” Max slowly stood up as he motioned for the Italian to replace him next to you.
“You’re sure?”
“Yeah, yeah…” Max ran his finger through his hair, as his eyes settled on the back of the jet. “I’m gonna stretch my legs a bit and get a drink, you guys want anything?”
Both you and Kimi shook your heads. Kimi then took Max’s seat, and observed you as you were reading the maths problem he was having issues with.
“Show me what you’ve done for now,” you said before Kimi also gave you his notes. You looked back and forth between what he had written and the exercise, before you managed to pinpoint what was confusing him. “Okay, got it!”
For the next couple hours, you worked with Kimi on his maths exercises as he showed you his method which you would correct when necessary. He was not a dumb kid, far from it, but he just needed someone else other than his high school teacher to explain things to him. You were definitely not a teacher yourself, but it seemed that your way of seeing things was close enough to Kimi’s. Therefore, he was gradually understanding his lesson better and was able to do his calculations a bit quicker than before as he more easily knew which formula to use.
You didn’t know whether you had just gotten the title of Kimi’s official maths tutor or not, but the esteem that the young driver had for you had exponentially risen and you were definitely his favourite person from now on. He thanked you at least a dozen times, as he was over the moon that he would not get behind his classmates while he was racing around the world.
Although glad that you had been able to help him, you were thankful that Kimi was the only driver who still had school as you didn’t know if you would survive parenting and teaching all the rookies at the same time.
…..
A short layover to breathe some fresh air, several chaotic card games, and a couple naps later: you were finally landing in Bahrain.
You already knew that the race weekend was starting more peacefully than the last one, as all your grid kids were leaving the plane on equal terms. This meant that the rookies would be less grumpy about having to split your time between them.
On Friday, you spent the first half of the day with Ollie. He was being replaced with Haas’s reserve driver – Ryo Hirakawa – for FP1 and was therefore “free to hang out with you” as he happily told you. His notion of being free wasn’t exactly the same as you, especially when he actually spent the first half hour of FP1 at the pit wall. Still, he eventually took the time to be there with you in his garage during the second half. He introduced you to the mechanics, showed you his driver’s room, and tried to make you spill secrets about Red Bull with some engineers.
You had a good time, and you truly enjoyed seeing more of Ollie in his ‘racing habitat’. You had always spent most of your weekends in the Red Bull garage since you started dating Max, so this was a nice change. Haas was another type of family, maybe – definitely – friendlier than what you were used to with Christian Horner and Helmut Marko. You even had the opportunity to meet Laura, the first and only female engineer in Formula 1, after the session had ended. You were glad to talk a bit with her, and you could only express your admiration towards the fact that she had reached the pinnacle of motorsport.
Eventually, Max called you to know about your whereabouts and suggested that you have a late lunch with him. He then had no choice but to accept when you answered his call on speaker with Ollie beside you, the rookie asking to join you. He also had to agree to Kimi tagging along when you and Ollie met him on your way back to Red Bull.
Fortunately for Max, the two rookies were needed back to their respective garages earlier than expected due to their lack of racing during FP1. So now, he could properly enjoy some alone time with you.
“I know you pretend to be annoyed with them, but you actually love spending time with them.”
“I only put up with it because you love spending time with them.” That was a lie, and the both of you knew it. “I can admit they’re growing on me, but I’m allowed to want to hangout with my girlfriend during the races. Alone.”
“We’re always together outside of races though,” you pointed out.
“Except when we do overtime”, Max added.
“Overtime?” You stifled a laugh. “You act like it’s a full-time job to take care of them.”
“It is a full-time job to be parents.”
“So you admit to being their grid dad?” You teased him.
“Step-dad, maybe…” He reluctantly admitted. “You’re the one who adopted them, I’m just accepting my fate because I’m dating you.”
“You’re unbelievable! You’re the one who began taking them under your wing during testing!”
You were appalled at Max’s refusal to admit of being the one who started this entire thing, until you noticed the smirk on his face. That damn smirk, you thought. That damn smirk that meant that Max was just toying with you, enjoying the fact that he could rile you up anytime.
“You’re just fucking with me”, you concluded.
“Of course I am,” he confirmed with a laugh. “I know what I did. And I absolutely know that I can’t pretend not to enjoy spending time with them. They’re indeed a bit overwhelming sometimes when I just wanna be alone with you, but they’re nice kids and I can’t argue with their passion.”
“You’re just a softie, Max. Who would’ve thought?” You wanted to tease him; but deep down, you were just melting at how sweet Max was. He had truly grown attached to the rookies, as much as you did, and it warmed your heart. “Wait, so you wouldn’t mind if we adopt some more? I have some names to suggest.”
“Please no,” Max immediately refused. “Six is more than enough.”
“But I’m sure they’re nice kids too!” You tried to plead your case, doing the best that you could at giving puppy eyes to Max.
“No”, he refused once again. But after a minute of silence, he eventually asked: “Just out of curiosity, who are you thinking of?”
“Luke and Dino”, you told him with a satisfied smile.
Max pretended to think about it for a moment, grabbing a bite of his food. You were thoroughly watching him, and waited for his reply. Eventually, Max sighed and you knew you had won.
“Maybe when they’re in F1, you can ask again…” He mumbled before you quietly cheered with a fist pump. Max softly smiled at the scene, and shook his head when he realised what he had just promised you.
He now just had to hope that there wouldn’t be any new rookies for at least a few years.
…..
The rest of the weekend was quite uneventful, the only thing worth noting was the insane heat that had you always carrying an iced drink wherever you went. You had been envying Mercedes’s space jacket that seemed to be doing wonders for Kimi and George, which almost made you go to their garage to ask for one.
Max wasn’t having the best weekend, which was a slight disappointment for him and his team after his superb race in Japan last week. On Saturday, the Dutch driver had only managed to reach the fourth row. He was two tenths off Lando and six tenths off Oscar – who had gotten pole, which was highlighting the fact that Red Bull was not going to have a flawless season. Even Kimi had qualified higher than him, getting P5 after a small penalty that made him lose a position post-qualifying.
The other rookies were scattered across the rest of the grid: Jack and Isack would start right outside points; while Liam, Gabriel, and Ollie had not made it to Q2. You had offered extra support to Ollie, who would start dead last, and encouraged him until the day of the race.
It seemed to have positively affected him, as he gained ten positions during the race and ended up being the only rookie to score points in Bahrain. Max had only reached P6 at the chequered flag, far from the podium he had been used to being on. He knew he had no choice but to accept that this could be a reoccurring performance from his car, and could only hope to keep getting the most out of it to still be a podium contender for the next race.
After the post-race interviews, you wanted to celebrate with Ollie as you were over the moon at his performance and his working strategy that had accommodated the safety car. But you knew he was with his father and brother, so you decided to let him have some family time.
However, you hadn’t thought about the fact that you were now like family to him as well. Because as you were waiting near the Red Bull hospitality for Max to finish his interviews – he was weirdly always in very high demand from every channel when he missed out on a podium, you saw the Bearman men walking up to you.
Ollie was frantically waving at you, yelling at his father and brother to keep up.
“She’s there, come on! Be quicker”, he ordered them as his long legs made him reach you faster than his family.
“Ollie, hi sweetheart!” You went for a hug, rubbing his back. “What a great race you did, I’m super proud of you!”
“Thanks,” he replied with a bright smile. He noticed his family finally there, and introduced you to them. “So this is my dad, and my brother Thomas. Guys, this is–”
“We know”, Thomas interrupted with a deadpan tone. He said your name and reached out his hand for you to shake. “He already talked a lot before, but now he talks even more when it’s about you.”
“Don’t be rude to your brother”, his dad scolded. “Sorry about him. But he’s right, we’ve heard lots about you.”
“Oh! All good things I hope,” you said with a nervous chuckle as you also shook Ollie’s dad’s hand.
“Of course, Ollie just loves telling us about you and your boyfriend spending time with him. It’s honestly reassuring to know he has you if we’re not there for him.”
“Well, I love Ollie – Max does too. So, it’s really my pleasure to have him around.” You were being genuine, and Ollie’s dad could only approve of you being a new adult figure in his son’s life. “You have a good kid, sir. Extremely respectful and really passionate,”, you told him as you softly looked at Ollie.
Ollie couldn’t have expected a better encounter between his dad and his grid mum. His eyes were bright and his smile wide, happy to have made his two families meet.
“Do you want to join us for a late dinner?” Ollie’s dad offered. “You can bring Max as well if he wants too.”
“Oh, that’s sweet. But I wouldn’t want to impose!” You wanted to refuse, but another glance at Ollie and you saw how hopeful his expression was.
“Just a drink then?” Ollie’s dad suggested, to which you nodded.
“Great!” Ollie cheered. “Call Max and get him here ASAP,” he told you.
“Jeez, calm down. It’s almost like you’re more excited to see him than me now”, you teased.
“Well, he’s the world champion.”
“And here I thought you were starting to like me better!”
As you bickered back and forth while texting Max to know his whereabouts, Ollie’s dad observed the exchange and he could only smile at the scene. It was easy for him to notice your motherly nature, gentle and caring. He knew his son was in good hands around the paddock, and he was truly glad to see that Ollie was surrounding himself with good people that could be trusted.
_________________________________________________
Finally, there was Saudi Arabia.
You had seen the pictures of some drivers arriving at the airport. And you had witnessed how welcomed they were when you arrived with Max. Like everyone else, he had been gifted a massive bouquet of flowers that you would have been jealous of if anyone other than the grand prix staff had given it to your boyfriend.
As soon as you left the airport before taking a taxi to your hotel, Max immediately gave you the flowers. One could have thought that it meant he just wanted you to take them as Max was already holding your suitcases, but you knew better.
Without a word, you understood what Max meant. He was just offering you the bouquet. For him, it meant more sense for you to have it. The flowers were pretty, like you, and he just felt like you deserved them more than he did. Also, it meant that Max could see a smile slowly making its way on your face and that was worth more than anything else in the world to him.
…..
As soon as you entered your hotel room, your first instinct was to lay on the bed with a relieved sigh. Max was supposed to be at the track soon, and your only wish was to take a nap.
“I really need to get used to triple headers again. That shit is exhausting,” you complained.
“Just rest,” Max simply told you. “I’ll come back after I’m done with media day and we can go out to eat, is that good?”
“That’s a great plan, yeah.” You turned on your side, ready to fall asleep at any second.
Max softly smiled at you, and hoped that you would be able to get some energy back for the weekend. He closed the curtains a bit before leaving the room, hearing you thank him as he was about to open the door while you were quickly getting into a deep slumber.
When you woke up several hours later, the sun was starting to set. You yawned and stretched your arms before getting up, noticing Max on the couch a few metres away. He looked up from his phone when he heard the sheets rustling from your movements.
“Slept well?” He asked. He actually knew the answer already, due to you not having heard him get back as well as the pillow marks on your face.
“Best nap of my life, top ten easily. When did you get back?” You glanced at your watch, before taking a seat next to Max.
“Half hour ago, I think. Maybe forty minutes. Wanna get some food now or do you wanna do something else?”
“Food sounds perfect right now, I’m starving. I think I could go for…” Your voice got lower as something in your peripheral vision confused you.
“For?” Max repeated, expecting you to finish your sentence.
“What’s that?” You were now forgetting all about food, your gaze focused on the table near the windows.
“What’s what?”
“The flowers.”
“You mean the flowers from this morning? Yeah, what about it?”
“Why did one bouquet turn into seven?” You could have thought you were going crazy, but you were certain Max had only given you his bouquet earlier today.
“Oh, that’s just the rookies.” Max was acting as if it was a normal occurrence, leaving you speechless.
“They gave me their bouquet?”
“Yeah. Apparently they saw pictures of me giving you mine and they felt like you deserved theirs too,” he explained. “They all accompanied me to drop them off when I came back here.”
“Oh, okay…” You felt like crying. Why are those kids so sweet? You wondered. Even if they thought you deserved their flowers, you definitely didn’t deserve their kindness.
“Are you gonna think about it every day for the next week?”
“Absolutely,” you confirmed with a chuckle. “You know me so well – that’s for real so nice of them, I love them.”
“And they definitely love you too”, Max added.
After admiring the seven bouquets adorning the table for a few more minutes, you took a picture of the scenery and decided to make a groupchat with all the rookies to thank them for their thoughtfulness.
You didn’t know it yet though, but the groupchat would never experience a day of silence from the moment it got created. That’d be for you to enjoy – and for Max to dread whenever your phone would notify you of a text – as the rookies were definitely certified yappers.
…..
If you thought the heat had been too much in Bahrain, it was somehow worse here. You were extremely thankful for night races, but you were definitely not built for extreme temperatures and were already dreading Singapore months in advance.
Like the previous weekend, you were therefore holding a refreshing drink at every given moment and gladly sipped it. Max had stocked up for you in his driver’s room, but you had to discover that there was only Red Bull. Was Max trying to kill you? Perhaps. Was Max trying to kill himself? More likely.
But you just couldn’t be drinking that for the entire weekend. So on Friday evening, you ventured around the paddock to look for something else and met Gabriel on your way. He was unfortunately unable to take part in FP2 due to a fuel leak, and you offered him to join you on your quest for a decent drink.
“Sauber has surprisingly good stuff, if you want” Gabriel pointed out.
“I don’t wanna risk seeing Binotto, though. What about sneaking into McLaren?” You suggested. “The champions must have something nice.”
“You mean other than a life supply of Monster? Is it actually better than Red Bull?”
“Well, technically I do prefer it. Don’t tell Max though,” you whispered with a chuckle. “But yeah, I guess that means Mercedes is out too.”
Eventually, you and Gabriel ended up getting basic tap water somewhere random in the paddock as you were both too thirsty to spend more time deciding where to go.
It was rare for you to spend one-on-one time with Gabriel, but you were glad to get to know him more – you truly hadn’t spent as much with him as you did with the other rookies. Max had always told you about how he held the Brazilian driver in high regards, and you could easily understand why. Gabriel was easy to get along with, and you really hoped that he would one day be able to show his full potential to the world. He had won the F3 and F2 championships back to back, but was unfortunately in the worst car of the grid now that he was in F1. He was still waiting to get his first points of the season, and you were definitely rooting for him to score some before the end of the year.
It still wouldn’t be his weekend yet as once again, he had qualified P20 on Saturday. And although he had gained two positions the next day, he was still last in the race due to Pierre and Yuki both DNFing. Jack didn’t have the best end of a grand prix either as he finished right above Gabriel, both having been lapped during the race by the leaders. Ollie and Liam had been a bit closer to reaching the top ten, but only Isack and Kimi had actually scored points.
You wished you could have spent your post-race time with the rookies to congratulate the point scorers and cheer the others up, but you felt like Max needed the support more despite having finished on the podium. He had gotten P2, bringing some good points to the team. But it wasn’t enough for him – he should have been first at the chequered flag.
Max was pissed. He was mad about the unfair penalty, mad about the FIA, mad about everything. He had refused to say more than two words during the post-race interviews of the top three, and didn’t even participate in celebrating the papaya drivers on the podium – he had preferred to immediately down his fake champagne as if it were a real one.
You knew that it wouldn’t last. Maybe he would throw some snarky reminders during the next grand prix and complain about it for a couple days, but then he would get over it because it would annoy him even more to keep thinking about it.
So you did what a loving and supportive girlfriend would do: you waited for him to come back to his garage, sitting on the couch in his driver room. He was glad to see you when he entered the room, and even more so when you gave him a kiss.
One turned into two, and you were soon ready to give Max the best makeout session of his life. You really thought you would’ve stayed there all night with him until some Red Bull mechanics would force you out as they were dismantling everything. But that was until he was the one to cut it short with one last quick kiss before he let go of your waist. You reluctantly removed your arms that had been around your boyfriend’s shoulders, and waited for him to say something while he had begun to change from his racing suit.
“Text the kids, we’re going out as soon as I’m out of this.”
“The kids?” You questioned.
“The kids,” Max confirmed with a nod. “Tell them we’ll do whatever they wanna do, whether it’s having the biggest post-race dinner of their lives or just doing something fun – ask them if they wanna check out one of the amusement parks near the track.”
“Wow, okay.” You let out a chuckle, not expecting Max to suggest that. You did as you were told, and texted the rookies about Max’s idea.
Anyone free to go to an amusement park?
Max is offering (and probably paying)
Safe to say, replies were sent almost instantly. The rookies were all happy to see that you were the one texting, and they got even happier when they actually read the content of your messages. The smile that was forming on your face was enough of a confirmation to Max, as he knew that you had definitely received positive answers.
“All good?” Max asked you, to which you nodded. “Okay, let’s go then. I don’t wanna see or talk to anyone else here so let’s get the hell out of here before I go insane.”
“Yes sir,” you answered before following Max until you were out of the garage and walking towards the track exit.
When you were finally out of the paddock, you notified the rookies of your whereabouts then sent them your location so that they could find you and Max more easily. Soon enough, the six rookies had joined you and you could all go check out the nearest amusement park.
…..
You had been at the Atallah Happy Land Park for almost two hours, having already gone on several rides – the first having obviously been bumper cars. It was unusual to see Max being so carefree and relaxed around other people than you, but it seemed that the rookies got this effect on him – on anyone actually. Max was just having fun, enjoying the night.
Right now, you were currently on a bench. You were sipping a drink Max had insisted on buying you after you had made a comment about the heat still being too much for you. Your eyes were carefully observing the drivers from a few metres away. Max was in the middle of organising the order in which he and the rookies would do the next rides, based on how long the queues were and how far the rides were from each other.
You couldn’t help the smile that appeared on your face, as you thought about how lucky you were to have Max in your life. He was being so attentive to the six drivers around him, listening to all of them, and treating them like they were his equals. He was just glad to make them happy tonight, because it made him happy too.
Checking something on your phone, you didn’t notice someone approaching until they were right in front of you. You looked up at the sight of unknown shoes, and met the eyes of a random man. You raised an eyebrow at him, silently asking if he needed anything.
“Hi! I couldn’t help but notice you were sitting all alone here,” he said. “So I thought you might need company.”
The guy wasn’t necessarily creepy or making you uncomfortable – he seemed nice and had a gentle smile, but you wondered if he would eventually notice that seven F1 drivers were now looking in your direction.
“I’m not here alone, though.” You glanced at where Max and the rookies were. Your relaxed form was enough of an indication to Max that you were handling this, and he knew that he didn’t have to intervene.
“But you’re alone right now,” he pointed out. “I’m not trying to be insistent, sorry. But can I still sit and maybe get to know you?”
“I’m fine by myself. Thanks for the offer, though.” You gave the man a smile, one that would be kind enough but still showing that you wouldn’t change your mind.
“Oh, okay…”
From afar, Max was almost wanting to laugh as he noticed how the guy’s posture had slumped a bit – it was a sign that he wasn’t successful in shooting his shot with you. However, the rookies weren’t reading the situation in the same way as Max, and they were confused as to why your boyfriend was leaving you alone to fend for yourself.
“Shouldn’t you go save her?” Ollie wondered.
“This creep is bothering her and you’re not doing anything,” Liam added.
“She’s fine, don’t worry.” Max actually enjoyed seeing the rookies being worried for you – it was cute and endearing, but it wasn’t needed.
“If you won’t protect her: I will,” one of the drivers said before leaving the group to walk towards you.
Back to you, you thought you would now be left alone. But despite his previous words, it actually seemed that the guy would insist a bit more before giving.
“Well, it was still nice to meet you. I’m–”
“Leaving?” Someone behind the man asked.
You leaned on the side to see who had talked as you took another sip of your drink, and noticed that it was Kimi. He was trying to look intimidating, even though he was definitely a few inches shorter than the guy.
“Who even are you?” The man asked, now annoyed that he was being interrupted by a kid.
You wondered if he knew that there had been an F1 race right next to the amusement park, and if he would realise that Mercedes driver Kimi Antonelli was standing in front of him.
“I’m with her,” Kimi simply said. “And I think you’ve been bothering her too much, so you can leave now.”
“You’re dating her?”
“What? No! Oh my God, that’s my mum you’re talking about.” Kimi didn’t think before speaking, and he eventually processed his own words a few seconds later.
You wanted to laugh. You wanted to laugh so bad right now, but you figured it wouldn’t hurt to follow the lead of Kimi’s lapsus. You obviously knew that he had meant to describe you as his grid mum, but the lack of precision about your actual parental role was working better in this situation.
“That’s actually flattering that you think I’m young enough to date him, but yeah that’s my kid right there.” Deciding that you had entertained the guy enough, you stood up from the bench and smoothed out the wrinkles of your dress before going to stand by Kimi’s side.
“I tried to be nice and polite to you, you know. But I wouldn’t even date someone who’s already a mother, at a suspiciously young age.” The guy sighed as he ran his fingers through his hair, and turned around to walk away.
Exchanging a look with Kimi, you both bursted out laughing at what just happened.
“That was kinda funny, to be honest. Thanks for saving me”, you told Kimi as you ruffled his hair. “Son”, you added with a teasing smile.
“Stop, I’m embarrassed to have said that.” Kimi covered his face with his hands, blushing as he remembered his words.
“Don’t be”, you tried to reassure him. You put your arm around his shoulders, before pulling him alongside to walk back to the other drivers that had observed the situation from afar. “It was kinda cute how you came to save me – my knight in shining armour who protects me better than my own boyfriend.”
Blushing even more at the praise, Kimi couldn’t help the proud grin that appeared on his face. He realised that you would have actually handled it perfectly on your own, but he was glad that you had appreciated him coming to help you.
When you both joined the group that had been waiting for you, they all asked questions about what had been said. Not wanting to embarrass Kimi in front of his friends, you stayed vague and simply said that the Italian driver had been way too intimidating for the guy and that he had scared him off.
“I honestly have a hard time believing that Kimi would look threatening,” Gabriel teased.
“That guy didn’t stand a chance against Kimi, though. And I don’t know how much longer it would’ve taken for him to take a hint,” you explained.
Max knew what you meant. You would have been fine on your own, but you were still glad for Kimi to have sped up the process of making the man give up on you.
For several more minutes, the rookies kept commenting and making theories about what had gone on - which Kimi neither confirmed nor denied. Out of the corner of your eye, you then noticed that Jack was stifling a yawn as the conversation died down.
“Might be time to go to bed?” You suggested as the other rookies also started to yawn.
“Yeah, I think so…” Jack admitted.
“Are you leaving with us?” Ollie asked, expecting you and Max to walk them back.
“There’s one more ride I wanna do with her,” Max joined in as he slipped his arm around your waist. “So we’ll stay just for a bit, but you go back safely.”
“Text me when you’re back to your hotels”, you told the rookies who all nodded.
After sharing hugs, they then walked away from you and Max. They turned back a couple times to wave at you, yelling thank yous for inviting them. You waved back at them with a large grin on your face, until they were out of your sight.
“So, what have you planned for us now?”
“Just follow me, you’ll like it.”
“Confident are we now, Mr Verstappen?” You raised an eyebrow at him, trying to guess which ride – amongst the tons the park had – you hadn’t been on yet.
“Always, when it comes to you.”
Squeezing your waist, Max pulled you along while he started walking to where he wanted to take you. It only took a few minutes before you noticed which ride was in the direction where you were going.
The Ferris Wheel.
You had often told Max of your love of ferris wheels, trying to go on them whenever you had the chance. But to your luck, or more like lack thereof, there was always an issue: too many people queuing, technical difficulty, arriving right after it closed…
But as you stopped in front of the ferris wheel, it seemed like nothing was preventing you from going on it with Max.
So here you were now, sitting next to Max as the cabin was slowly going up. You could only admire the streets of Jeddah from up there, noticing the track that was near.
“Are you feeling a bit better now?” You eventually asked when the cabin stopped at its highest point. Your tone was quiet and soft, afraid to ruin the peaceful silence.
“Yeah,” Max replied. “Thanks for tonight, I really enjoyed it.”
“Well, it was your idea. I barely did anything.”
“You came. That matters to me,” he explained. “You matter to me. The kids too.” Max leaned back with a sigh. “Fuck, I love those kids.”
“Welcome to the club”, you said with a chuckle. Slipping your hand into Max’s, you squeezed it to remind him of your presence – not that he would ever forget it. “I’m really glad you had fun, that was like the best post-race activity we ever did.”
“I can think of another activity that might be on par with that.” Max looked at you, a smirk on his face.
“I really can’t take you anywhere, of my God!” You couldn't help laughing, which made Max chuckle as well. “If you’re lucky and I’m feeling generous, you might get to do this one too.” You saw the way Max's eyes lit up a bit as he straightened up. “Only if you behave once we’re back on the ground.”
“Yes ma’am,” Max promised with a grin.
A comfortable silence settled again, lasting until you were leaving the ferris wheel. You and Max roamed around the amusement park for a bit, walking hand in hand under the bright artificial lights, until you saw that they would close soon and it would be time for you both to go back to your hotel room.
The smile on your face hadn’t left yet, and your cheeks were still flushed as a result from the heat. Max stole a couple glances at you, admiring how you looked under the night sky of Jeddah. He was truly grateful for you, grateful for your support, grateful for your love.
As he removed his hand that was in yours, Max draped his arms around your shoulders. The gesture made you stop in your tracks and look up at him, before noticing that his eyes were already on you.
“What?” You asked with a confused smile.
“Nothing, you’re just beautiful. Can I not admire my girlfriend anymore?”
“Who would I be to deny you that”, you sarcastically replied as you put your arm around his waist
Taking advantage of the fact that your face was so close to his, Max leaned down and kissed you. It was short, but meaningful. When he pulled back, you didn't hesitate to use your free hand to cup his face and pull him down to kiss him again. His lips smiled against yours, and Max realised he could taste the slight remains of the sugary drink he had bought you earlier.
Not a word was needed between the two of you, as you mutually started walking again in the direction of your hotel. When stopping at crossroads, waiting for the lights to turn green, Max would give you quick forehead kisses. You would smile every time he did it, and the blush on your cheeks never had a chance to go away.
Max usually wasn’t much for PDA, unless it was an arm around you or his hand resting on your lower back, so you were pleasantly surprised at how affectionate he seemed tonight.
It was the consequence of everything that had happened today on track, making you the somewhat only stable thing in his day-to-day life. Max liked having you close to him, and he was definitely not letting go of you for the rest of the night.
..........
Taglist: @umm-i-love-u @callsign-mirage @freyathehuntress @elieanana @suns3treading @fastandcurious16 @l3thal-l0lita (couldn't tag the last 2 people sorry guys)
Hope y'all enjoyed this🫶🏻🫶🏻 took me a while to write it omg like i respected the poll that showed most people wanted the whole triple header in chap so this ended up being almost 10k words lol
I'm trying to not be too repetitive when i talk ab the race weekends, so I'll keep doing my best during the rest of the season to spice things up a bit and also focus on what happens off track like i did a bit here!!
I've started writing for the miami gp, and it should be out next week (i hope😭) + I'll def write a short part ab jack being swapped w franco bc i need smth to cope w the driver change
See you soon, take care of yourselves, i love y'all xx
#f1#formula 1#f1 x reader#formula 1 x reader#max verstappen#max verstappen x reader#f1 x you#formula 1 x you#max verstappen x you#mv1#mv1 x reader#mv1 x you#grid mum series<3
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Prada Shoes and I Love Yous
PAIRING: heeseung x fem!reader
GENRE: smut, angst, crack, (some?) fluff, college!au, exes to lovers!au, enemies to lovers!au, socialite/richkid!au
SUMMARY: Life as a socialite wasn’t all champagnes and designer labels, especially not with the turn your reputation took due to a simple misunderstanding. Now, you were being painted by everyone as a big fat cheater who shattered her sweet boyfriend’s heart—a narrative that couldn’t be further from the truth. In reality, it was him who had betrayed your trust. Frustrated and feeling deeply wronged, you returned to society and the new school year after a summer of cutting off contact with everyone and the drama. But just when you thought you were ready to face the world again, you were blindsided by something unexpected: the lingering effect Heeseung had on you. And who could blame you? Heeseung was way too hot for you to get over in just three short months and now, seeing him with the girl he once told you not to worry about all over him? Oh, it was on.
You refused to be replaced, labeled as a crazy ex, or forgotten. No, you were going to make Lee Heeseung realize that you were the best motherfucking thing to had ever happened to him.
WC: 21.4k
WARNINGS: some extent of emotionally cheating? (not actual cheating i swear it’s kinda unintentional), jake is a bestie and fwb hybrid (kinda flirty but it’s very much platonic i swear), so much miscommunication, profanity, drinking, drugs, physical altercation, mentions of puke, slut shaming, mentions of pregnancy (no one is actually pregnant), toxic relationship, roughdom!heeseung and sub!y/n, unprotected sex, oral (m recieving), rough sex, unprepped? sex (consensual), creampie, mirror sex, deepthroating, cowgirl, dick too big?, creampie, and i am so sorry but karina is a BITCH like it’s almost campy how villainess she comes off
AUTHOR'S NOTE: hope everyone has fun with this one!! had a lot of fun writing it like and i'd love to hear you guys' feedback! love you lots <3 ☺️
Fuck Lee Heeseung. Fuck Lee Heeseung. Fuck Lee Heeseung.
This was all you found yourself repeating in your mind like it was some mantra while you reapplied your lip gloss, making sure to take one last good look at yourself in the mirror before shutting it close once you felt the plane’s wheels coming to a stop. From the outside, you looked absolutely perfect as not a single hair could be found out of place; no one would’ve guessed that you had been on a plane for over 10 hours. But inside, you were a wreck as you felt your anxiety shooting up as your heart raced a million beats per minute.
“You need to loosen up, you look like you have a stick up your ass.” Jake was lazily scrolling on his phone while nursing a champagne in his hand, barely sparing a glance at you. He seemed to be in a much more relaxed state than you were.
You scoffed before sending him a glare. “You know, if anything, you should be the one panicking right now. Everyone’s going to be talking about how we came back together.”
“Good thing I don’t give a shit about what people say, right? Should’ve thought that through before inviting me,” Jake shrugged, finally lowering his phone to look at you. His nonchalant attitude was pissing you off. “Plus, this all just looks worse because Ryujin decided she wanted to spend one last week with whatever his name was.”
He wasn’t wrong. It hadn’t just been the two of you in Monaco for three months; Ryujin had also been very much present. However, she found herself a summer fling named Louis, and unlike you and Jake, she couldn’t find herself boarding your private jet without spending one last fiery week with her lover before saying goodbye for good and starting school again.
“Maybe we should have just stayed an extra week with her. It probably would have saved us from the shit show that I know we’re gonna be bombarded with the second we step off the plane.” You released a deep sigh before you started to gather your belongings around you.
Jake followed suit, grabbing his stuff and getting up from his seat. “Well, if we stayed back an extra week, then that would mean we’d have to deal with your mom’s wrath for missing her annual end-of-summer garden party that we promised we wouldn’t miss. You know how important it is for her, and to be honest, I’d rather face Heeseung’s wrath than your mom’s.”
He was right. This garden party of hers had been going on every year since even before you were born, and you’d be out of your mind to miss it. It was single-handedly the most important event every year for your family, and you couldn’t even begin to fathom how your mom would react to your absence.
You reached over and snatched the champagne glass out of his hand before you downed whatever was left in it in one gulp as you braced yourself, hoping the alcohol would give you the courage you needed to step off the plane.
“Well, then I hope you’re prepared to take on Heeseung. Maybe he’ll be nice enough to spare your pretty face. God knows it’s the only thing you have going for you.”
Heeseung was going to fucking kill Jake Sim.
When he woke up this morning, you were the last thing on his mind, something he seemed to have finally freed himself from. However, all the hard work he put into casting you away from his mind seemed to have been in vain, as now all he could think about was you and how you had returned after three months of radio silence with the guy you cheated on him with.
Livid didn’t even cover what he was feeling, and it was evident in the way he swung his club. Each hit seemed to be driven by a surge of pent-up frustration.
“What the hell, man? That’s the third time today you’ve been way off course. What’s going on?” Jay shot him an incredulous look as he tried to locate where the golf ball had landed.
Heeseung let out a frustrated groan as he ripped off his glove and shoved his driver back into his bag. “Y/N’s fucking back.”
That was all Jay needed to hear to understand what was going on with his friend. "Shit, I saw. I’m sorry dude, it’s fucked up."
Heeseung was in no mindset to be playing golf right now. All he wanted was to go back home and wallow miserably in his bed. Unfortunately, they were only on hole ten of eighteen, and judging by his performance today, Heeseung knew it was going to take awhile.
"Did you know?" Heeseung couldn't help but blurt out, his frustration evident in his voice as he watched Jay effortlessly swing a shot miles better than his own.
Confusion flickered across Jay's face as he turned to face his friend. "What do you mean?"
“Did you know that she was coming back with Jake?” Heeseung felt his jaw tense as he mentioned his ex-friend.
“I didn’t even know he was with her until today. Honestly, I thought he’d just fucked off somewhere and didn’t bother telling any of us, considering how things went down. You know me, I would’ve told you straight up if I had found out earlier.” Heeseung trusted Jay implicitly. He was as loyal as they came, but unfortunately, the same couldn’t be said for everyone in their friend group.
"Do you think Sunghoon knew?" Heeseung's question elicited an audible groan from Jay.
If anyone in their friend group knew how Jake spent his summer, it would undoubtedly be Sunghoon. However, Sunghoon was notoriously tight-lipped, especially when it came to sensitive matters. Since the breakup, the entire friend group had undergone an incredibly awkward shift. It seemed that everyone had more or less chosen a side, and allegiances were clear.
"You know he wouldn't tell us anything if he did. It's getting ridiculous. The other day, I saw Gaeul and him having brunch or something at the clubhouse, and the moment she spotted me, she practically sprinted over to explain herself. She claimed she's still 'Switzerland' in the whole situation and hasn't chosen a side," Jay recounted, frustration evident in his voice.
Heeseung almost snorted at the absurdity of it all. Their friend group had never been one to keep secrets or tiptoe around each other, but the last few months had been nothing but that. The betrayal by you and Jake had not only affected Heeseung's relationship with you but had also tainted the dynamic of their entire friend group.
“Literally, what is there to be ‘Switzerland’ about? I mean, this whole thing isn’t even complicated. Everyone saw them go into the bathroom together and come out literally holding hands. Trust me, I know what she looks like after giving head, and that's literally what she looked like in that video Beomgyu sent. Plus, Karina literally heard them.” Heeseung angrily got into the golf cart as Jay fished the keys out to start driving.
“Okay, well, no offense, but in all honesty, Karina’s probably not the most reliable source, cause she’s in an extremely biased position, but I guess that’s beside the point.” Jay’s words seemed to instantly bring a frown upon Heeseung’s face.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Heeseung’s tone sharply switched up in an almost defensive manner.
Jay, feeling this shift, nervously cleared his throat as he stammered, trying his best not to offend his already sensitive friend regarding an even more fragile situation. “I mean, uh, well. You know…”
“What?” The grip he had on the seat of the golf cart seemed to get tighter as he waited for his friend to elaborate.
“Dude, you can't be serious? You know Karina’s been trying to ride your dick for the past, what, give or take ten years? I mean, we all know that she’s never had a good relationship with Y/N, and I’m pretty sure most of that resentment stemmed from the fact that you’ve always been head over heels for Y/N.” Jay slowly parked the cart and turned off the engine as he explained.
Still not understanding Jay’s point, Heeseung furrowed his brows, shooting his friend another annoyed look before getting out of the golf cart. “What are you trying to get at?”
“Jesus fucking Christ, you’re dense. I mean, the last couple of months before Y/N cheated on you was the closest you seemed to have gotten with Karina because of that final project that you guys had or whatever. I mean, you were with her more times than you were with your own girlfriend, and knowing Karina, she seems like she could be delusional enough to have maybe taken that as a sign that you were interested in her? I mean, this is all speculation, but I’m just letting you know what we all saw.”
Jay cautiously treaded this topic. Heeseung was his best friend since they were babies, and he would always be on his side, but Karina was never anyone’s favorite with her extremely polarizing personality. He had no allegiance towards her, not to mention that she wasn’t actually even in their friend group and always only ever found lingering around wherever Heeseung was, so it was much easier for Jay to actually see through her. In fact, it seemed that all of their friends could pretty much catch on to Karina’s end goal except Heeseung.
“So you think it’s my fault that Y/N cheated on me?” The air got tense as Heeseung snapped at Jay while snatching his 7-iron out of the bag. “Just because I spent some time doing a stupid fucking school project with Karina doesn’t mean it gives her reason to go and suck off one of my best friends.”
Jay shook his head even before Heeseung was done with his sentence. Heeseung seemed to not be getting the point. “Fuck no, dude, that’s not what I’m saying. Karina has an incentive: you. If she gets rid of Y/N, then it means you’re up for grabs. Of course, Karina didn’t force Y/N to get on her knees for Sim, but she was the first one to come running, telling us what happened even before Beomgyu sent that video.” Heeseung was trying hard to focus on trying to get his ball on the green as he geared up to swing while listening to Jay.
“So you don’t think she should’ve warned me of what she heard?” He swung precisely, but it seemed that this whole course, to be precise, wasn’t going easy on him. He’d be lucky to get even a double bogey on the par-4.
Jay slightly grimaced at Heeseung’s shot. “No, it’s not that,” he let out a sigh as he walked over to Heeseung. “Look, you’ve been my best friend for as long as I can remember, and I know the past few months have been fucking hard because of what Y/N put you through, and I just want you to be careful. Karina’s always been kind of a conniving, spoiled bitch who finds a way to get what she wants. Just because she’s been warming your bed every night since Y/N fell off the fucking Earth doesn’t mean she should be someone you start trusting.”
There was nothing he could say back to his friend’s words and it seemed that what Jay had said clung on deep to Heeseung's thoughts throughout the day, casting a lingering shadow and leaving a bitter aftertaste in his mind.
A small bead of sweat trickled down your back as the sun's relentless heat beat down on you. You took a small sip from your now lukewarm glass of champagne, its warmth doing little to refresh you. Today felt even hotter than previous years, and once again, you found yourself questioning why your mother insisted on hosting her most important event during the hottest month of the year.
Your cheeks were hurting from all the forced smiles you’d already given to family friends and important figures in your mother’s business circle. This garden party was always about promoting her upcoming collection and ensuring the continued support, financial and otherwise (not that she needed any more money), of both new and old acquaintances and partners. So, as always, it was no surprise that you were dressed head to toe in unveiled pieces from your mother’s upcoming collection. While no one could deny her incredible eye for fashion and the breathtaking quality of her creations, the white-tiered tulle dress with its plunging neckline felt entirely too inappropriate for a garden party and was getting on your last nerve. You stood out like a peacock—a testament to your mother’s outstanding handiwork—but you weren't a fan of the attention it drew.
“I need to get out of this fucking dress,” you muttered through gritted teeth, your annoyance palpable.
Jake chuckled softly beside you. “I can think of a few ways to get you out of that.”
You shot him a sharp look, clearly unimpressed by his insinuation. “Don’t say shit like that, especially around everyone. It’s not funny.”
“What? No one's around to hear, and even if they did, it wouldn’t matter. Everyone already thinks we’re fucking, and to be fair, they’re not that off.” He shrugged, a smirk playing on his lips.
Without hesitation, you elbowed him hard in the ribs, your face growing even more pissed off. “That’s not funny, Jake. Seriously, shut up. It happened only a couple of times and that’s it. If anyone hears that, they’re actually going to think I cheated on Heeseung with you.”
Your pretty face sported a cold, serious expression, leaving no doubt about how much this mattered to you.
“Honey, I told you, they already think you cheated on Heeseung with me, so this isn’t going to change anything. Besides, you know damn well it wasn’t just a couple of times,” Jake rolled his eyes at your dramatics.
“Yeah, well, the difference is that every time I slept with you was when I wasn’t dating him, so I didn’t actually cheat. You’re just making everything worse by making it seem like you’re confirming what they already assume.” Your irritation was through the roof, and the heat was doing nothing to quell your annoyance.
Before Jake could say anything else, your mother’s saccharine voice filled the space. For once, you were grateful for her impeccable timing. “Oh, darling, I’ve been looking everywhere for you!”
The event’s dress code was always an all-white affair, but even then, your mother seemed to shine brighter than any of the guests. You were almost taken aback when you fully turned to face her. “Hey, Mom.”
You flashed her a tight smile, but she barely spared you a glance, her attention focused entirely on the figure next to you. Jake seemed to stiffen under your mother’s gaze. “Hello, Jake. You seem to be enjoying yourself,” she said, giving his attire a quick once-over and humming in approval. “You look quite nice. Brioni, I’m assuming?”
“Yes, as usual, the event is beautiful Mrs. L/N. You’ve definitely outdone yourself,” he nervously chuckled. Despite his attempts at flattery, your mother’s cold gaze remained fixed on him. “And you’re right, it is a custom piece from Brioni.”
“Unsurprising, seeing that your father is rarely seen in anything else. Perhaps you could enlighten him to broaden his wardrobe, and maybe we can see about getting you a custom piece of mine. I have no doubt the materials I use are incomparable to much of what’s in your wardrobe already. Though, I’m sure you already know that, since it seems much of your time these days is spent taking my beautiful pieces off my daughter.”
“Mom!” You gasped loudly, your eyes widening in disbelief at her bold statement. Your mother was never one to hold back her words, but this was beyond her usual antics. Next to you, Jake stiffened even more, nervously trying to regain his composure.
"Uh, Mrs. Y/LN, I can assure you that whatever you think is happening between me and your daughter is not actually true," Jake stammered, his voice strained with tension.
Your mother clicked her tongue in annoyance, obviously not buying his claims. "Well, the conversation I overheard the two of you having before I came seemed to say something different."
“Mom, can we not do this here?” You darted your eyes around, making sure that no one else was catching on to what was happening.
“Well, darling, I would usually never impose myself like this in your personal relationships, but it seems like the two of you have brought not only our families into this but now also my business as collateral just for the sake of some mindless fucking.”
You had never heard your mother speak with such scandalous vocabulary before. Seeing her like this was beyond unsettling and left you utterly speechless.
“Ma’am, I assure you that the rumors about our infidelity are not true at all. It’s been a huge misunderstanding that—"
"Jake, I've always held you in high regard, ever since you were a baby raised alongside my daughter. You've grown into a very smart and handsome young man, one your parents should be proud of. Out of respect for your mother, who you know is one of my closest and longest friends, I've tried to overlook what's been happening over the past few months. However, overhearing the two of you brazenly talking about your sexcapades in public, especially during one of the most important events of my year, is something I simply cannot ignore. This has not only strained my relationship with one of my closest business partners, but it has also jeopardized our families' standing. If anyone else had overheard, I can’t even begin to think how much worse the already damaging rumors would become."
“Mom seriously can you stop this,” you were furious that she would decide to do this here of all places. “This is fucking ridiculous and you know damn well that none of those stupid rumors are true. We can talk about this later, please.”
"I believe I'm entitled to speak as I please, especially considering this is my event," she retorted sharply. "Your father and I were generous enough to allow you to spend your entire summer break away without expecting you to address this mess you've created for us. I had hoped for better judgment from you. Instead, you and Jake decided to further exacerbate this situation by turning this trip into some sort of romantic getaway. I sure hope you were at least being smart and careful. The only thing that would make this situation worse is if you were to become pregnant. Who knows, you might even be pregnant right now. It wouldn’t even surprise me seeing as though that seems to be the only thing the two of you were doing in Monaco.”
Jake was a stuttering mess, his face flushed with embarrassment at the accusation. "Mrs. Y/LN, I swear that's not true," he managed to stammer out.
Before he could say anything else, your mother cut him off again. "I'm not so sure I can trust you on that. How can you be so sure that you didn't knock up my daughter?"
You were seething with anger at your mother's behavior, ready to intervene when suddenly a figure caught your eye.
Heeseung's fist connected with Jake's jaw before you even had a chance to react. The punch caught Jake off guard, and as he tried to recover, Heeseung landed another swift blow to his face.
"You got her pregnant?" Heeseung's voice was filled with anger as he launched himself at Jake, who was still reeling from the first two punches.
“What the fuck!” Jake groaned, struggling to fend off Heeseung's relentless assault.
Beside you, your mother was in a panic, shouting for security as everyone's attention turned to the commotion that erupted in front of you.
Before you could step in, Jay appeared out of nowhere, desperately trying to pull his friend away from their former friend.
"Heeseung, stop!" you screamed, rushing to Jay's aid.
But Heeseung was relentless, disregarding his surroundings entirely. All sense of decorum was abandoned as he straddled Jake, who was attempting to dodge Heeseung's blows while pushing him away.
From the other side, Sunghoon came running over to help pull Heeseung off of Jake. "Jesus Christ, Heeseung, get off him!"
After a couple of seconds of struggle, the three of you were finally able to pull Heeseung off of Jake, though he continued to struggle in attempts to break free. Security, called by your mother, arrived and joined in to help restrain the enraged boy.
Jake laid on the grass, his previously pristine custom white suit dirtied with splatters of blood and dirt from rolling around. Heeseung didn't look much better, his own suit now stained with blood, evidence of the fight. Despite being at a disadvantage, Jake had managed to land a few good punches, evidenced by the blood dripping from Heeseung’s nose. It was a chaotic scene, with whispers and murmurs from the other guests confirming their attention on the altercation. You could sense your mother's fury, even without seeing her directly.
"What the hell is this?" A gruff voice angrily interrogated.
Heeseung’s father had never been an easy person to be around, so you couldn’t even imagine how angry he currently was at his son’s behavior.
However, Heeseung seemed not to hear his father, his eyes staying trained on Jake, who was getting up with Sunghoon's help.
“Oh my, Liz, I am so sorry. I’m appalled; I genuinely am. I'm so embarrassed. I don’t know what came over him.” Heeseung’s mom quickly ran over to where your mother stood with fury and attempted to sincerely apologize.
“We are leaving.” Heeseung’s dad yanked his son from the security’s grip and started to drag him away, but not before also turning towards your mom with a stern look. “Yes, we apologize for our son’s behavior. We hope it didn’t ruin this beautiful event, and we will be excusing ourselves. Thank you for having us.”
You were still in shock with everything, and it seemed that everyone else was too, as no one moved and stood in silence, taking in everything that had happened. There was no way this just happened.
To say the last couple of days had been hell for you would be an understatement. Honestly, it felt even worse than the days following your breakup with Heeseung, when you could at least pack your bags and leave the country. But this time, with school starting in a week, that luxury would unfortunately not be granted to you a second time. Your parents were adamant that you face the mess head-on and frankly you found yourself wishing that you never returned from Monaco.
To make matters worse, Ryujin still wasn’t back. While she called every day, you still felt alone, especially since you hadn’t talked to Jake since your mom’s party. Rumors about your supposed pregnancy were rampant, further emphasizing your alleged infidelity, and you figured it was best to get some space from Jake until the rumors died down.
With nothing to do, you found yourself doing things you’d never normally do—like wandering down the chip aisle, looking for something to make you feel better about your situation.
“No, Ryujin, you don’t get it,” you huffed into the phone, frustration evident in your voice as you searched desperately for anything that sounded good. “I’ve gotten DMs from random people I’ve barely spoken to, asking if I’m actually pregnant and how far along I am. I’m so fucking sick of this.”
“Oh babe, I’m so sorry. This sucks so bad. It’s literally so fucking absurd and Heeseung was so stupid for this like I still can’t believe he did that. Don’t worry though, I’ll be there soon so just hold on,” Ryujin sounded sincere as the sound of waves echoed in the background. You envied your friend, who was probably at the beach right now, getting a nice tan with her hot beau, and not miserably suffering in this stupid predicament like you were.
“Ugh, I can’t wait until you’re here. I’m like seriously going through it and I just hope it’ll die down once school starts, but I doubt it because—”
“Y/N?”
You were abruptly cut off by a shrill voice. Even before you turned your head to face them, you knew exactly who it was and found yourself unable to hold back an exasperated groan. “Fuck, I’ll call you later, Ryujin.”
Karina had always been one of the most beautiful girls you knew, even from a young age and you couldn’t deny that she looked stunning now, even under the horrendously yellow dim lights of the grocery store. But, like always, she had a knack for bringing out a grimace on your face, which you sported as you turned to face her.
“Oh my God, no way! I thought it was you earlier but I was like, no way is The Y/N out shopping for groceries. But honestly, who else could it be? I mean, you’re unmistakable.” Karina held a shopping basket in one hand that barely had anything in it. She was dressed like she was about to attend a charity gala, a stark contrast to your Lululemon shorts and an old shirt from Heeseung’s closet.
“Hey, Karina,” was all you could let out before she animatedly started speaking again, not giving you a second to talk.
"It's been so long! I mean, how long has it been since we last saw each other? You didn’t even say goodbye to any of us and just left but you look great, especially considering—oh, and congrats! Honestly, I was actually worried it would be awkward between us, but once I heard the news, all my worries disappeared. You and Jake seem so happy together, and you have no idea how thrilled I was when I heard that you guys are about to start a family. It’s so cute and I now know that there's no reason for me to worry about you getting mad about me and Heeseung. Although I was a little surprised your boyfriend attacked mine like that, but I’m sure it was just a misunderstanding.”
Karina spoke without pausing, giving you no time to digest her words and she didn’t seem to notice your growing annoyance as she continued to babble with that smug look on her face.
“Wait hold on, you and Heeseung are dating?” There was no way you heard her right.
But it seemed that you did as she nodded with a bright smile on her face. “Yeah it’s still kind of new only a couple of months but it’s been amazing. I mean I’m sure you know just as well that he’s like literally the best.” Her voice slowly drowned out as you took everything in. A couple of months ago was literally when you left for Monaco so it meant that Heeseung didn’t waste any time to make Karina his girlfriend.
“What the fuck, Karina?” You didn’t hold back, making sure she knew you were beyond enraged at this new revelation.
Her face held a surprised expression as you cut her off abruptly. “I’m sorry, but what do you mean?”
You rolled your eyes. You knew she understood exactly what you were talking about, and it infuriated you that she was pretending otherwise. You knew Karina too well; she was reveling in the fact that she currently had something you didn’t for the first time in her life.
“Drop the act, Karina. I don’t have time for this shit. We both know exactly what you’re trying to do, and it’s pathetic. You and your friends can call me a slut for supposedly cheating on Heeseung, but it’s rich coming from you when you and Heeseung literally did the same thing. Not to mention the fact that you two didn’t even wait a decent amount of time before getting together after he and I broke up. So honestly, I hope you’re both happy and sincerely, fuck you both.”
You didn't bother to stick around to hear whatever else she had to say. As you turned and walked away, you felt your eyes welling up with tears. You thought you were over Heeseung, but clearly, that wasn’t the case. The revelation of his new relationship pulled at your heartstrings, making you wonder if you ever really mattered to him the way he did to you. Nothing hurt more than realizing that the two year-long relationship you cherished above all else might have been a joke to him.
“Ryujin, I really don’t think I’m up for going out,” you sighed, looking at yourself in the mirror. Ryujin, on the other side of the room, was finishing her makeup at the vanity.
“No way, I told you, you’re not staying holed up moping around because of Heeseung again. You already did that in Monaco, and I’m not letting you waste any more time on that asshole. You’re coming out with us, and you are going to have an amazing night.”
Ryujin had finally come back the day before, and while having her by your side made you feel better, you couldn’t stop thinking about your ex.
“I seriously doubt one night of drinking and partying will make Heeseung disappear from my thoughts,” you muttered, rolling your eyes. You knew Ryujin would end up dragging you out, but that didn’t mean you couldn’t complain the whole time.
“I think you’re underestimating the power of a good night out. Who knows, maybe you’ll find some hottie to get your mind off everything,” Ryujin shrugged while spritzing perfume. “Maybe you should go looking for Jake.”
You shook your head at her. “Jake’s not going to help.”
“Well actually, from what I remember I think Jake helped a good bit with speeding up the process of you getting over moping about Heeseung a couple of months ago so who’s to say that it won’t work this time?”
“I am not sleeping with Jake again. That would literally make everything like so much worse. Everyone already thinks I’m pregnant with his kid. I don’t need more things to fuel that rumor.”
Ryujin wasn’t wrong about your summer situationship with Jake helping to distract you, but continuing it back here would only add fuel to the fire. Not to mention, your relationship with Jake was purely platonic with some sexual attraction. That was all it ever was even back in high school, and you had both talked at length about how neither of you saw a relationship beyond friendship. So even if you went to him looking for something more, Jake ultimately wouldn’t be able to give you what you wanted.
“Well then there’s other people! What about-” You cut her off abruptly.
You cut her off abruptly. “Ryujin, I know you’re just trying to help, and I really do appreciate it, but I just think sleeping with other people isn’t going to solve anything. I just want to lay low this semester and focus on school. I don’t want to be wrapped up in more drama.” Done with the conversation, you grabbed your purse, suddenly more eager to get to the party if it meant changing the subject.
“Ready to go?” you asked, and just like that, her eyes lit up and a wide, giddy smile spread across her face as she eagerly followed you out.
The Uber ride was short, and before you knew it, you had arrived. Hyunjin was known for throwing the best parties, and tonight was no exception. The massive manor, which you were all too familiar with, was already buzzing with more people than you imagined his parents would ever find acceptable.
“Hey, there you guys are!” Ryujin’s close friend Yujin, who you were also friendly with, excitedly ran over to greet you both. She had been studying abroad for 6 months and you hadn’t seen her since so you were even more elated to see her.
“Hey, Yujin! It’s been a while! You and Sunoo looked like you were having the time of your lives in Italy.” You greeted her warmly, following her inside as she led you to where all the drinks were.
“Oh yeah, it was beyond amazing, but I’m sure nothing compares to Monaco. God, I haven’t been there in ages.” She poured out shots and passed them to you and Ryujin. Without hesitation, the three of you knocked them back, grimacing slightly at the aftertaste.
“Fuck, I already miss it. It took like an hour to say goodbye to Louis, and I was so upset for the first 30 minutes of the plane ride. But the good thing about summer flings is that after the goodbyes, there's nothing left to hold onto, so it’s easy to get over.” Ryujin poured another shot for both of you while Yujin reached for a can of Ranch Water.
“I literally thought they were going to try something serious since she was with him all summer. Half the time, I couldn’t even find her because she and Louis were off somewhere, but I guess he really was just a summer fling.” You nudged your friend as Yujin let out an amused giggle.
“I bet! Those pics on your most recent Insta post, man, they were hot. What about you, Y/N? Any European hotties catch your eye?” Yujin wiggled her brows, and you rolled your eyes while reaching behind her for a can of Ranch Water.
“More like an Australian hottie,” Ryujin teased, and you instantly elbowed her.
“Jesus Christ, Ryujin, seriously shut up.” You shot her an annoyed look.
Yujin, however, seemed to find amusement in Ryujin’s remark as she gave you a wide-eyed look while giggling. “No way, so it’s true then?”
“Fuck no. I mean yeah, we hooked up, but I swear to God I’m not pregnant.” You shook your head vehemently.
You saw Yujin open her mouth, but Ryujin beat her to it, grabbing your arm. “Don’t turn around.”
Your brows furrowed at her panicked actions, and you started to turn your head, but she quickly stopped you. “What? What happened?”
“Fuck, Heeseung’s here,” Yujin answered, her eyes darting around past your head. “He’s over there near the pool table. Don’t turn around.”
You stood still, heart racing, as you listened to your friends' directions. You saw Ryujin's expression shift from panic to a scowl.
“And he brought Karina. She’s stuck on him like a fucking leech,” Ryujin sneered. Even before the summer, Ryujin had always been Karina’s number one hater, so her reaction was no surprise.
Quickly, you decided it would be best to leave the area, and the girls seemed to think the same as the three of you started to move. But before you could take a step out of the kitchen, a booming voice caught your attention.
“Y/N!” Sunghoon’s voice echoed through the music, loud enough for everyone in the vicinity to hear. You stiffened as you realized your presence was now exposed to everyone.
“Fuck, it’s been a long time!” He approached with a massive smile and, before you could even respond, engulfed you in a tight hug. Behind him, you spotted Jake trailing close by, rolling his eyes at his friend.
"Hey, Sunghoon," you greeted him back, debating whether to reciprocate the hug he wasn't letting go of.
"Okay, buddy, that's enough," Jake intervened, yanking his friend back.
"Oh, princess, you got even prettier while you were away! If that's even possible, but damn, you look amazing," Sunghoon's red, dopey eyes hinted at his intoxicated state.
"He's crossed," Jake confirmed, as if reading your mind.
"Oh God, why did you let him do that again?" Ryujin scolded Jake, delivering a disapproving look along with a smack on his arm.
"What the fuck! I'm not his babysitter," Jake retorted, shooting Ryujin a pointed look.
"Well, he is your best friend," you shrugged.
"I'm totally fine, you guys worry too much," Sunghoon shot everyone a smile before reaching for the drink in your hand, which you quickly pulled away.
"Yeah, Sunghoon, maybe lay off the drinking and smoking for now. I think I still have the video from the last time you got crossed," Yujin remarked, raising a skeptical brow at his current state. The mention of the video drew snorts of amusement from everyone except Sunghoon.
Instead, Sunghoon's eyes widened at her words, shaking his head vigorously. "I swear that won’t happen tonight."
"Well, it might if you keep this up," Ryujin added, recalling the infamous incident the last time Sunghoon was in this state. It involved projectile vomiting on a girl followed by passing out on her, effectively ruining any chance he might have had with her.
"Whatever," Sunghoon rolled his eyes, turning away, but before he could even take a step, he turned right back around (unsteadily with Jake stepping in to steady him), and blurted out, "Heeseung's here."
You could hear Jake cursing under his breath at Sunghoon’s words, while Ryujin nodded.
"Yeah, we were trying to sneak out of the kitchen before they noticed us, and then you had to go and yell Y/N’s name," Ryujin added.
"Oh," Sunghoon sheepishly nodded. "My bad."
"Does he have to fucking bring her everywhere?" Jake muttered, casting another glance towards where Heeseung and Karina were.
"You know, I even heard Jay’s getting sick of her tagging along everywhere."
"Where’d you hear that?" You shot Sunghoon a suspicious look.
“Gaeul.”
"She still hangs out with them?" Ryujin scoffed, clearly annoyed.
"She claims to be the neutral party between us."
“So she’s still being a fucking dumbass?” Ryujin shot back, clearly unimpressed with their friend’s stance.
"Well, she still reports everything back to us, so it's not all bad," Jake tried to reason, but Ryujin wasn't buying it.
From next to you, Yujin chuckled. "Your friend group is so fucking messy, thank God I'm not involved. I'm going to find Hyunjin for some weed. Good luck sorting out your drama." She shot you a wink before briskly walking away before anyone could respond.
"Are we really that messy?" Sunghoon asked innocently, but before anyone could answer, he vomited everywhere.
You were cursing under your breath as you tried to wash the puke out of your shorts, fuming at Park Sunghoon. Thankfully, they were black, so staining wasn't an issue, but standing in your underwear in a house party bathroom, scrubbing your pants instead of enjoying the night, was infuriating. Even if you managed to clean them, you'd be stuck wearing damp pants for the rest of the night.
As you wrung out the fabric, desperate to dry them as much as possible, the bathroom door suddenly swung open.
“Oh! Sorry— Y/N?” Heeseung’s eyes widened in surprise when he realized not only that someone was already in the bathroom but that it was you.
In your haste to escape Sunghoon's vomit, you must have forgotten to lock the door. Naturally, Heeseung had to be the one to barge in.
The two of you stood there awkwardly, each taking in the other's appearance. It was technically your first real encounter since your return, discounting the brief moment at your mother's garden party before Heeseung was promptly escorted away by his parents.
He looked way too good, enough to stir butterflies in your stomach. It was unsettling how Heeseung could still have this effect on you after everything that had happened.
"Hey, Y/N," he greeted cautiously, breaking the silence. The tension in the room was palpable.
"Hey, Heeseung," you replied, unsure of how to navigate the awkwardness.
"Sunghoon was right," he blurted out abruptly, his words coming out in a rush before he could stop himself.
Your eyebrows knit together in confusion. "What?"
"I-I mean, he said... that you look even prettier now," Heeseung stumbled over his words, his cheeks flushing with embarrassment. "I mean, not that you weren't pretty before, but, um... yeah."
Your cheeks warmed at his unexpected compliment. This wasn't how you had imagined your first conversation with him after coming back would go.
"Uh, thanks."
A few more uncomfortable seconds ticked by before Heeseung finally seemed to notice your state. "Uh, what are you doing?"
You had completely forgotten about your current attire—just in your underwear, a lacy black thong that had driven Heeseung wild a few months ago.
"Oh, Sunghoon threw up on me after getting crossed," you explained, shaking your head in annoyance as you returned to wringing out your shorts.
"Again? Fuck, he really needs to learn not to do that. If he had a nickel for every time he puked on a pretty girl while he was crossed, he'd have two," Heeseung remarked, a hint of amusement in his voice. You couldn't help but let out a small laugh. There was no way you were actually laughing at your cheating ex’s jokes.
Heeseung seemed to relax a bit upon hearing your giggles, joining in with a laugh of his own.
"Here, let me help. There's probably a dryer around here somewhere," he offered, finally deciding to step into the bathroom as he closed the door behind him. He bent down, rifling through a couple of cabinets until he found what he was looking for.
"Fuck, I don't know why I didn't think of that earlier," you muttered, taking the dryer from him and plugging it in before switching it on.
He reached over to hold your shorts for you while you dried them. After a few minutes, you turned off the dryer, confident your shorts were dry enough by now. "Thanks," you said, taking them from him.
As you looked up at him, you suddenly became aware of the closeness between the two of you. Your breath caught in your throat as your eyes locked with his.
Fuck he was hot.
You could feel the all-too-familiar warmth spreading throughout your body as the two of you held each other's gaze, neither daring to look away. Slowly, almost as if guided by muscle memory, you inched your faces closer until you could feel his breath on your lips, poised to kiss him. But a small voice in your head stopped you before you could fully lean in.
“Wait.”
Heeseung instantly pulled back. "Fuck, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that."
"No, no it's not that. I can’t do that to Karina," you hurriedly explained, shaking your head. Tears threatened to spill over as the pain of Heeseung's past betrayal resurfaced. Despite any animosity toward Karina, you couldn't bring yourself to inflict that same hurt on anyone else.
"What?" Heeseung furrowed his brows, confusion etched across his face as he looked at you.
"Heeseung, you can't just fucking cheat on her after you cheated on me with her!" You shot him an incredulous look, unable to believe how close he had come to infidelity once again.
His head shook vehemently, confusion clouding his eyes. "What do you mean? If anything, you're the one who's cheating!"
"Jesus Christ, for the last fucking time, I'm not dating Jake!" You yelled in frustration.
“And I’m not dating Karina!”
The two of you stared at each other, mutual confusion now evident, leaving you both speechless.
“What?”
"Yeah, I'm not dating her! And what do you mean you're not dating Jake?" Heeseung shot back, equally bewildered.
"I literally saw her a couple of days ago, and she told me the two of you had been dating for a couple of months," you said, watching Heeseung shake his head in disbelief.
"What the fuck! She's fucking lying, we are not dating, let alone have been dating. That fucking bitch, literally what the fuck," Heeseung was beyond pissed.
You scoffed, equally heated. "Karina was literally rubbing it in my face about how happy you two were. And for your information, I have never dated Jake."
"What the fuck, Y/N? I fucking punched him!" Heeseung felt like he was going insane. Everything he had believed for the past few months was suddenly a lie.
You rolled your eyes at his outburst. "Yeah, I fucking know. I was there, if you remember! He still has a fucking split lip because of you, and my mom's still beyond mad about it."
You had to be lying, Heeseung couldn’t believe your words. “There’s no fucking way.”
“Yeah you fucking dumbass, you beat him up for nothing.”
“Wait, wait, wait no it’s still fucking justified! He was one of my best friends who went on and fucking slept with my girlfriend!” There was no way the two of you were actually having this conversation at a raging party after not seeing each other for three months.
"No, he didn't! Or at least not while we were dating, and I'm also not fucking pregnant!" Your voice echoed in the cramped bathroom. You were still intoxicated and could feel a headache coming on.
"Fuck you! Literally, everyone saw you two that night," Heeseung retorted sharply, but before he could continue, it seemed he fully absorbed your words, his eyes narrowing in disbelief. "So you have been fucking Jake!"
"Yeah, but only after we broke up, not before! And you can't be acting all innocent when you've literally been with Karina!" You were annoyed by his accusatory tone. He was such a fucking hypocrite.
"Okay, but I didn't blatantly sleep with her at a party while we were still together like you did—"
You cut him off by smashing your lips against his, needing to silence him in any way possible. You couldn't stand another moment of arguing about this.
You could feel Heeseung freeze for a second, taken aback by your action, but he quickly recovered as you could feel his lips move against yours.
There was nothing romantic about the kiss as the two of you hungrily pushed back against each other, fighting for dominance. Teeth clashed against each other as your tongues battled back and forth and you could barely breathe, but it seemed that neither of you considered stopping anytime soon.
His hands quickly found themselves ripping your top off you as yours went straight down to undo his pants and push them down. You finally pulled away from the kiss to spit on your hand before going straight back into his lips. Not a second was spared to think about your actions as you didn’t hesitate to stick your hand down his underwear. He was already half-hard and you quickly wrapped your hand around his length, inciting a groan out of him.
While one hand worked on pushing down his underwear the other worked on pumping him. Heeseung was in almost the same state as one of his hands was found groping at your boobs, playing with your nipple, while the other also attempted to pull your underwear down.
As soon as your thong reached mid-thigh, Heeseung quickly broke the kiss to turn you around and roughly push you down against the bathroom counter. You jolted at the cold counter pressing against your already sensitive nipples but Heeseung pushed down hard on your back so you couldn’t lift yourself up. You looked helpless in the mirror and without warning you felt his dick plunging deep inside of you.
You gasped at the intrusion. Sharp pain erupted within you as tears welled in your eyes and you could do nothing except tightly squeeze them shut while your hands desperately attempted to grab at anything to hold on to. Heeseung had started to fuck you without even giving you a second to adjust and your cries filled the bathroom.
You hadn’t been fucked like this in so long and sure Jake was a freak in bed with a big dick but he had never considered fucking you before making sure you were prepped. No, this was Heeseung’s specialty. He fucking loved it and you couldn’t help but also find yourself loving the pain that came with his pleasure.
“Fucking slut, look at yourself,” Heeseung growled in your ear before roughly grabbing your hair and pulling it back, forcing you to face yourself in the mirror.
“Please, Heeseung,” you could barely moan out.
His hand gripped your hip so tightly that he knew bruises from his fingers were sure to be left afterward and his eyes were crazed as he battered himself even harder against your cervix, giving you no respite.
“What? What else could you want, I’m already fucking you. Greedy whore.” You felt yourself clench tighter around him as you heard his words. You were almost there as you could feel the tight coil just about ready to snap.
“Oh fuck, Heeseung harder,” you screamed.
Heeseung did just as you asked and as if it was possible, you felt him force himself even deeper inside you at a faster pace. You knew he was battering deep at your cervix, but you were too focused on chasing your orgasm that you couldn’t even care for the dull aching pain. His hand in your hair pushed your head against the mirror and you found yourself unable to stop yourself from drooling and fogging up the mirror. His animalistic grunts filled your ear and the grip in your hair got tighter.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” You screamed out as the coil snapped and you felt yourself reaching your ultimate high. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you slumped against the mirror, having no strength to hold yourself up.
Heeseung was also close as you felt his cock twitch inside you and before you knew it, warm spurts of cum painted inside of you as you felt him thrust a couple of more times while he panted. He came so much that you could even feel some drip down the inside of your thighs.
“Fuck,” he breathed out as he slowly pulled out, watching his cum drip out of you and land on the bathroom floor.
You were still slumped against the mirror, attempting to catch your breath and process what had just happened.
As your eyes connected with Heeseung’s through the mirror, a rush of emotions overwhelmed you. The weight of what the two of you had just done bore down on you, and shame began to smother you, making you feel like you were suffocating. You couldn't stay there with him a moment longer. Quickly, you dressed yourself, doing your best to ignore the aching pain between your legs. Heeseung looked confused by your sudden change, but before he could say anything, you were out the door, leaving him to dwell on the implications of your actions.
You honestly hadn’t been listening to anything Ryujin had been saying for the past couple of minutes as she rambled on. Instead, you stared at the piece of salmon on your plate, analyzing each line that ran through the fish. If you didn’t focus on this, your mind would start drifting back to what happened yesterday, and you'd rather shoot yourself in the foot than think about that.
“Hey, Y/N, are you even listening?” Ryujin raised her voice, trying to get your attention.
Snapping out of it, you finally took your eyes away from your dinner and looked up at her. “Oh, sorry, I got distracted.”
“Yeah, no shit. I’ve been talking to you, and you went catatonic or something. What is up with you?” She furrowed her brows at your unusual behavior.
“Nothing, I’m fine,” you quickly responded, but you knew the second she put her utensils down that she wasn’t buying it.
“Don’t fucking try to lie to me. I can see through your bullshit. What’s wrong?” Her gaze was intense, analyzing you as if there would be an external sign explaining your strange behavior.
You sighed, debating whether to tell her exactly what had happened. Deciding against it, you realized that if you opened that can of worms, things would get even messier. “Uhm, I don’t know, I guess I’m just still hungover.”
“You didn’t even drink that much yesterday, though,” she said, brows still furrowed. She had noticed you hadn’t come out of your room all day and had to literally drag you out just to get dinner with her.
“Are you sick? You don’t really look sick though.”
You shook your head, searching for anything to blame your odd behavior on. “Uhm, I just think I bruised my cervix, and it just hurts.”
Her eyes instantly widened, and you could see her holding back a grin. “Oh my fucking God, you slut. You had me thinking something actually bad had happened! When did you and Sim even run off to fuck?”
You sighed in relief, glad that she was distracted by the news you had just dropped on her. She didn’t notice the lingering look in your eyes that indicated there was actually something deeper driving you mad.
“Uh, quickie in the bathroom. I don’t know, you were probably too drunk to notice.”
She hummed while nodding. “Yeah, I’m not going to lie, I don’t really remember much after Sunghoon puked everywhere. But fuck, a bruised cervix from a quickie is insane. Oh, Yujin is going to love this.”
“Yeah, it’s a fucking bitch. I feel like I’m sitting on a knife or something,” you said. You weren’t lying about this part—you were sure Heeseung had actually bruised your cervix with how hard he fucked you last night—but you were fine letting her think you had slept with Jake instead.
“Oh, my poor baby. No wonder you’ve been in bed all day. Let’s just get this boxed up and head back to the apartment. Geez, I’m gonna have to have a talk with Jake later.” You flashed her a smile, nodding at her suggestion, glad that this not only got her off your back but also got you out of having to stay another thirty minutes at this restaurant.
Y/N (evil bitch) 👹:
if anyone asks we fucked last night kk?
JAKEY 🤢🦮:
wtf
Y/N (evil bitch) 👹:
no questions pls
JAKEY 🤢🦮:
fuck that what’d u do 🤨
Y/N (evil bitch) 👹:
none of your business go back to playing roblox with riki or something 🙄
JAKEY 🤢🦮:
THAT WAS ONE TIME
JAKEY 🤢🦮:
fuck you
JAKEY 🤢🦮:
tell me!!!!! you made it my business when you dragged my dick into whatever it is so i deserve to know 😤
Y/N (evil bitch) 👹:
i bruised my cervix
JAKEY 🤢🦮:
HUH
JAKEY 🤢🦮:
NO I’M NOT TAKING THE BLAME FOR THAT??
Y/N (evil bitch) 👹:
everyone’s gonna think you have a big dick
JAKEY 🤢🦮:
bet 🙂↕️
The rest of the weekend passed without Ryujin or anyone else probing into your life, and you couldn’t have been happier. There were so many moments where you debated whether or not you should reach out to Heeseung, but you quickly dismissed the idea. Besides, you had blocked him on everything, and you were sure he had done the same, so there would be no point in trying.
Distracted by thoughts of Heeseung, it had completely slipped from your mind that school was starting back on Monday. Last night (thanks to Ryujin of course), you hurriedly packed your school bag and made sure you had everything for the first day.
And while you usually enjoyed school, just from today, you already felt overwhelmed. It seemed that all your professors had decided to assign work and readings for the next class. You were already swamped with assignments, feeling the weight of the semester ahead.
“Okay, but don’t you think I at least deserve to know who you slept with?” Jake's voice cut through your thoughts as you walked through the library shelves, searching for a book your professor had assigned out of nowhere that wasn’t even mentioned in the syllabus. You had been barely listening to his yapping as most of your focus was on finding the book.
“Ryujin won’t stop talking my ear off about how I broke you and how you couldn’t move all weekend. She thinks I’m an ass and won’t stop scolding me like I’m the one who did it! I’m a gentleman—I’d never bruise anyone’s cervix without permission,” Jake said with an exasperated tone, trailing behind you.
“I’m pretty sure gentlemen, at least the ones i know don’t beg on their knees for anal-”
He cut you off, his eyes widening. “Alright, alright! That was one time and I was drunk. Jesus, woman! And don’t act like you didn’t let me do it—you were perfectly fine with it. Either way, I still feel like I should know who the fella is.”
“Please don’t say fella, it’s such a turn-off.” You scrunched your face at his choice of vocabulary, shaking your head before turning back to search for your book.
“Okay, fine, whatever. I just want to know who I’m protecting from Ryujin’s annoying ass, and honestly, I think Sunghoon overheard her, so now we can assume the whole school knows.” It was well-known that once any news hit Sunghoon, it spread through the school like wildfire. He had a bit of a loose lip and an affinity for gossip, making him the school’s personal Deuxmoi, but with none of the anonymity (maybe Perez Hilton was a better comparison).
“I’m serious, Jake, you don’t want to know. Just leave it. You owe me anyway.” By now, you were growing increasingly irritated with Jake’s relentless probing and the fact that you still couldn’t find the damn book.
He shot you an incredulous look. “Owe you for what? Now you’re just making up debts that don’t even exist!”
“Anal,” you replied without missing a beat, already smiling, knowing his reaction.
“Oh my God, Y/N, fuck you literally! Geez, if someone had told me this was the price I had to pay for putting it in the ass once, I wouldn’t have even touched it with a ten-foot pole,” Jake exclaimed, and you couldn’t help but giggle. You loved to mess with Jake, especially because he was always so overly dramatic and had the best reactions.
“Seriously, Jake, you don’t want to know. You did your job, so thanks, but please stop bothering me about this.” You flashed him an exaggerated smile and patted him on the head.
Jake’s eyes widened, and he stopped in his tracks. “No fucking way.”
“What?” You didn’t like how he was staring at you.
“Please don’t tell me you slept with Heeseung.” The smile on your face instantly vanished as you froze at his words. How the fuck did he know?
“No fucking way. You just slept with the enemy? Are you kidding me? Do you see this?” He gestured dramatically at his face. “This is the aftermath of my survival from his wrath and proof that I fought valiantly for you. And you go ahead and sleep with him? Oh my God, and you made everyone think I fucked up your vagina when it was actually him? Holy shit, wait until Ryujin hears about this.” You quickly reached over and clamped your hand over his mouth, realizing how absurdly loud he was being in the library.
“Shut the fuck up, you’re practically screaming! And what the fuck are you even talking about? Of course, I would never sleep with Heeseung.” You did your best to mask your surprise, hoping he wouldn’t catch on.
Jake shook his head, scoffing in disbelief. “You’re such a shit liar. The only other time I remember your cervix getting bruised was when Heeseung fucked you on that yacht last Christmas. Remember how you had a hard time sitting straight at Christmas dinner?”
Fuck, he got you there.
You sighed and reluctantly nodded, closing your eyes in frustration. “Okay, fine. But please don’t tell Ryujin, Sunghoon, or anyone else. I already feel like shit about it, and my self-worth is in the gutter right now. I’ve been sick all weekend just thinking about it.”
“He didn’t force you or anything, right?” Jake's face shifted to one of genuine concern, his brows knitting together.
You shook your head. “No, of course not. It’s just that I regret it so much. I felt so gross afterward. It was just a really, really bad drunken mistake, and I don’t want to talk about it. Seriously, thanks for covering for me. You’re literally the best because I really don’t want anyone to find out. I just want to forget about it.”
Jake studied you for a moment, clearly understanding how much this was affecting you. He nodded, reaching out to give you a comforting hug, which you gratefully returned while you let out a sigh. “Yeah, don’t worry. I won’t say anything. Just let me know if he tries anything else or if you need anything.”
The hug was comforting, a small balm for the turmoil of the weekend. You were relieved he didn’t press further or make you feel worse about what happened. However, as you started to pull away, a familiar voice sliced through the air, bringing with it an overwhelming sense of déjà vu. Jake’s groan confirmed the arrival of the last person you wanted to see.
“In the library is kinky, but what can I expect from the two of you? Always so classy,” Karina’s smug tone cut through the air. You and Jake quickly broke from the hug, and you rolled your eyes as you faced her, already irritated by her presence.
“Are you stupid or like blind? Cause obviously if you weren’t then you’d be able to clearly see we were just hugging you fucking dumbass,” Jake snapped back, his tone sharp. Normally, you’d find his sass amusing, but Karina’s presence seemed to have sucked out any potential humor in the air.
“Jesus, Jake, you’re such an ass,” Karina snapped back at him before turning her attention to you. “Get your dog on a leash, would you? Maybe you should have been more careful about who you chose to have a kid with. The anger issues are seriously concerning with this one, not to mention the aggression. Heard about what happened over the weekend.”
“Karina literally shut the fuck up. You know damn well I’m not pregnant. It’s not even funny anymore; you’re just dragging it out. Just fucking mind your own business,” you snapped, your anger bubbling over. You could see Jake’s jaw clenched tight, his irritation matching your own.
“Well actually it kind of is my business 'cause Heeseung has been MIA all weekend, and I can’t help but wonder—since you’re such a slut—if you had something to do with it. The past few months since you two left were perfect, but the second you come back, everything seems to be fucked up. So tell me, what the hell happened at the party?” Karina’s sneer was almost unbearable, and you fought the urge to slap her.
“Maybe he finally realized what a fucking bitch you are.”Jake’s voice was laced with disdain. If Ryujin was Karina’s biggest hater, Jake wouldn’t be far behind her. Even as kids he hated even having to sit at the same table as her so his hostility towards her was all too familiar for you.
Karina ignored him as her glare remained fixed on you. Her pretty face now twisted into a deep frown and you knew she was pissed. It was a stark contrast to the fake friendliness she’d shown you just a week ago at the grocery store.
“I didn’t fucking do anything, and I don’t want anything to do with him, so fuck off. Seriously. Maybe Jake’s right—he finally realized how much of a clingy piece of shit you are,” you shot back, frustration evident in your voice. You should have known that Karina would notice Heeseung missing from her side for a good portion of Friday night.
Karina’s expression hardened as she took a step closer, unyielding. “You’re such a shit liar. What did you do?”
“This is bullshit. Let’s fucking go,” Jake said, grabbing your arm and pulling you away. Neither of you wanted to spend another second there.
“You know he said I did it better than you, right?” Karina’s taunt was intended to provoke, and it did just that. You froze, feeling her words hit hard despite knowing she was just trying to get under your skin.
“C’mon, let’s go. Don’t fucking listen to her,” Jake urged, tugging you along again. As much as you tried to ignore her, her words had a lingering effect, and you hated that they got under your skin.
You didn’t care that this was your last year in college; you were convinced that you needed to transfer anywhere far away from here. There was no way you could endure a whole year of torment from Heeseung and Karina. As if to cement this decision, today seemed determined to be the worst day of your life. The moment you arrived at your apartment, rage surged through you when you saw who was waiting for you in front of your door.
“I’m going to fucking call security,” you instantly snapped, pulling your phone out of your back pocket.
Heeseung’s eyes went wide as his hands reached out in front of him. “Wait, wait, wait! Please, Y/N.”
You stared up at him, his eyes pleading with you to hear him out. Those bambi eyes always got to you, and this time was no different. With a roll of your eyes, you slowly put your phone down. “Okay, but I swear to God, if you try anything—”
“I swear I won’t! I promise, I just really need to talk to you. I’ve tried texting you, but I think you blocked me,” Heeseung said, sheepishly scratching the back of his head.
“Fine,” you muttered before walking past him, opening your apartment door, and stepping inside. You left the door open, signaling that he could come in, but he seemed hesitant, staring at the open door.
“Are you coming in or not?”
He blinked a couple of times, surprised that you were allowing him into your apartment, but he quickly followed you in and closed the door behind him. He hadn’t been inside in so long that it felt almost surreal. Everything looked exactly the same, and he found himself realizing that he had kind of missed being here.
“Wow, nothing’s changed,” Heeseung remarked, his tone revealing his surprise, especially as he noticed the photo of the two of you still on top of the kitchen counter.
You followed his gaze and felt heat rise to your face. You didn’t really know why you hadn’t taken it down. “Uh, yeah, I mean, I also haven’t been here for like three months, so I didn’t really have time to change anything.”
Heeseung nodded, but as his eyes trailed back to you, he found himself staring, forgetting his words. You were as gorgeous as ever, but it seemed that the time away had only made him realize how even more beautiful you were.
“So, what did you want to talk about?” The air between the two of you was awkward, just like at the party however, seeing him sober during the day gave you a much clearer look at him, and you wanted to fucking die. You hated that effect he had on you.
“Oh, yeah, sorry, uh, I just wanted to check up on you. Friday was kind of intense, and you ran off before I could say anything, so I was worried. I’m sorry for being so rough with you. I shouldn’t have done that.” Heeseung had been beating himself up over how he had treated you, so much so that he hadn’t talked to anyone all weekend despite his phone blowing up with messages from his friends.
“It’s fine. It was something we both wanted, and if anything, it’s on me. I kissed you first, so I’m sorry for that.”
Heeseung shook his head. “No, don’t be sorry, seriously it’s okay, but uhm, I also just wanted to make sure you knew that I wasn’t lying when I said I wasn’t dating Karina. I swear I’m not.”
Your brows furrowed as you recalled the incident in the library a couple of hours ago. “Well, does Karina know that?”
“What?”
"She confronted me and Jake at the library, demanding to know what I did for you to ghost her all weekend." Heeseung frowned slightly at Jake’s name, and his frown deepened as he listened to what Karina had done. "From what it looks like, she seems to believe that your relationship is much more than whatever you’re saying it is."
“What the fuck? I swear we’re not together. I—” He stopped himself and sighed, realizing that to make you understand he was telling the truth, he had to tell you everything. “Fuck, I— Uh, shit, we’ve just been kind of hooking up, but I swear that’s all.”
He looked almost embarrassed admitting the nature of his and Karina’s relationship, and you could feel a part of your heart waver at what you heard. For him to admit out loud to you and confirm what you had thought was happening hurt despite you knowing that you didn’t have a right as you two weren’t together anymore.
“Oh, uh, okay.” You nodded as you quickly turned around and opened the fridge. You pretended to look around as if you meant to open the fridge before reaching to get the Brita out for water. You knew that if you faced him, the tear welling up in your eyes would pour down your face.
Heeseung went into a near-panic as he saw your reaction. Having dated you for over two years and known you for your entire life, he could tell you were upset. He noticed your shoulders tensing as you kept your back to him, looking into the fridge.
“Wait, wait, but I swear it’s nothing more than that, and I promise whatever happened between Karina and me is over. I don’t have any feelings for her—I never did. She was just there after you left, and it just happened,” he rushed to explain. But his words only seemed to make you feel worse as he continued to ramble.
“Why are you telling me this? You think this is going to make me want to get back with you?” You shook your head in annoyance, grabbing a glass from a cabinet and filling it with water from the Brita.
“No! I’m not trying to convince you of anything,” he said, now genuinely panicked. This was not how he intended the conversation to go.
“You know what she said?”
“Huh?”
“Karina, you know what she said?” He slowly shook his head, clearly confused by where you were going with this.
“She said that you told her she did it better than I ever did,” you snapped, your anger evident as you stared him down.
His eyes widened in shock, and he scoffed in disbelief. “What the fuck! I’ve never said anything like that to her or to anyone, and it’s not fucking true.”
“What? So she’s just lying to get under my skin?” You were fuming, frustration etched across your face. “Karina’s a fucking bitch, but even she wouldn’t just make something like that up. You must’ve hinted at something for her to believe it.”
“No, no, no, I swear I haven’t said or done anything remotely like what she’s claiming. She’s a fucking liar,” Heeseung's anger flared as he defended himself, clearly outraged at Karina’s audacity.
“Well, it still doesn’t change the fact that you ran straight to her bed the second I was out of the country—literally one fucking day after we broke up!” You huffed, clearly pissed.
“Ok well don’t fucking act like you didn’t do the exact same with Jake. What the hell, Y/N? It isn’t my fault we broke up! You literally slept with one of my best friends!” Heeseung's frustration boiled over, clearly bewildered that you were still trying to act like you had no role in ending the relationship.
“I’ve told you a million times that I didn’t cheat on you with Jake! What more do I have to say for you to believe me?” You were fed up with defending yourself on this issue.
Heeseung rolled his eyes, “Honestly, aren’t you tired of keeping all this up? Beomgyu’s video and Karina along with everyone else hearing about you two should be enough proof.”
“Oh my fucking God! Jake went into the bathroom with me to help because I was puking my guts out. I drank way too much that night because I was so upset after seeing my fucking boyfriend cuddling with some other bitch all night! You’re genuinely a complete moron if you think Beomgyu and Karina are reliable sources. Beomgyu’s been a fucking asshole to me since freshman year because he’s still bitter that I refused to sleep with him, and Karina has wanted to get with you for as long as I can remember. Seriously, I thought you had at least some common sense in you!” You were yelling so loudly that your throat was already starting to feel raw.
Heeseung shook his head in disbelief. He had no idea Beomgyu had even tried to make a move on you, and now that he thought about it, he realized there had always been tension between the two of you. While he knew about Karina’s crush on him, he hadn’t thought she’d actually go as far as to lie about this. “Okay, well people still heard you two together.”
“Fucking hell, Heeseung, it was a house party with a hundred people. You really think anyone could hear anything over the music? You know what, whatever—believe what you want. There’s no point in trying to convince you otherwise. I’ve been honest with you the whole time, and it’s been you who’s been unwilling to listen. You dumped me without even considering my side, even though you were the one neglecting me during that last month before we broke up, spending all your time with Karina. Honestly, even if you’re telling the truth about not sleeping with her before we broke up, it doesn’t change the fact that you emotionally cheated. The number of dates you forgot or canceled to be with her, and how many times I saw you two together on campus when you said you were just hanging out with the guys. Whatever. It doesn’t matter anymore. We’re not together. Just get out.”
Tears streamed down your face, and you didn’t bother wiping them away. You wanted Heeseung to see the pain he had caused you.
Heeseung was at a loss for words as he saw the pain etched across your face. It broke his heart and he couldn’t help but start to realize that maybe there was a chance you were telling the truth and that he might be to blame for everything. He felt his heart crumble. “Y/N…”
You sniffed and shook your head. “Get out, Heeseung. I never want to see you again.”
It had been a week since Heeseung had gone over to your apartment, and every day since, he had been determined to find a way to make it up to you. He knew what your last words to him were, but there was no way he was going to let you go that easily, especially now that he realized he was most likely the one in the wrong and that Karina was a fucking bitch. He had come to that solid conclusion five days prior when he finally decided it was time to confront her.
“Oh my God, what the fuck? Seriously, where have you been? What happened? You literally just disappeared,” Karina ran over to him once she saw him at the café he told her to meet him at.
Even looking at her face made Heeseung want to vomit. “I heard what you did.”
Karina frowned, not understanding what he was saying as she took a seat across from him. “What do you mean?”
“Y/N told me about what you did at the library.” Heeseung tried his best to keep his tone even, attempting to mask the rage he was feeling toward her.
Karina nervously laughed, trying to brush it off. So, he was with you while he ghosted her. “Oh yeah, I ran into her and Jake trying to get it on at the back of the library. Isn’t that fucking insane, like in public like that?”
Heeseung wasn’t in any mood to entertain her. He was already at a boiling point. “Cut the fucking bullshit. She also told me what you said to her at the grocery store. I don’t know what I did to make you think that we’re dating, but we’re not. I don’t even remotely like you.”
“What?” Karina was taken aback by his words. Sure, Heeseung was never as affectionate and loving towards her as he was with you, but she thought she had made good progress in getting him to fall for her.
“Yeah, so I swear to God if I hear you telling anyone else that we’re dating, I will get a fucking restraining order. You have been nothing more than an easy lay for me to get my mind off Y/N this whole time. I let you hang around me because I felt bad, but that’s over now, especially since I realized you’ve been lying to everyone, including me, about everything.”
Karina’s face paled as she took in his words. She opened her mouth to say something, but he didn’t give her a chance. “Also, you’re delusional if you think you’re even comparable to Y/N, much less better than her. Go learn how to actually suck a dick before going around telling anyone that. Seriously, fuck off, and don’t ever talk to me or my friends again.”
Heeseung took off right after that, leaving Karina sitting alone at the table. It felt like a weight had been lifted off his chest as he stormed out of the cafe. Since then, he’d been planning a way to get you to hear him out. The only thing he could come up with was outsourcing, and in this case, that meant trying to reach you through the people you hung around.
It was a no-brainer that trying to talk to Ryujin and actually getting her to hear him out would be harder than getting you to talk to him again, so that was out of the question, which left him with only one other choice.
Just standing in front of the apartment was making him pissed, but he knew this was probably his best bet. He let out a big sigh before knocking loudly. He waited a couple of seconds, and after a bit, he wondered if he should knock again, but before he could, the door opened.
“What the fuck?”
Heeseung was the last person Jake would have expected to be on the other side of the door, and it caught him severely off guard.
Heeseung hadn’t seen Jake since he beat him at your mother’s garden party, and while it seemed that any previous marks left on his face from the fight were gone, Heeseung still felt bad. Okay, well, actually he didn’t feel that bad because he was still beyond pissed at Jake. Heeseung had by now come to the conclusion that you were most likely telling the truth about not cheating on him, but it still didn’t change the fact that Jake had fucked you who knows how many times after the two of you broke up.
Jake had always been a very close friend of his since childhood, and if Heeseung was being honest, in high school there were a good number of times when he couldn’t help but find himself envying his friend. It was kind of always known in your friend group that Heeseung had always had a tiny bit of a crush on you. So, when it became known that Jake had been the one to take your virginity, Heeseung was beyond crushed. In fact, he had avoided Jake for a good week, too envious of the fact that it wasn’t him who had been your first. But he was quickly able to get (mostly) over it as he couldn’t deny that he wasn’t surprised; you and Jake had always been the closest. But now, knowing that Jake had broken bro code made that resentment resurface, and he wasn’t sure if it was going away anytime soon (if ever).
“I need to talk to you,” Heeseung reluctantly said.
“Fuck no,” Jake responded with a condescending laugh, shaking his head in disbelief.
Heeseung’s jaw tightened as he pleaded, “Jake, please.”
Jake stared him down, scrutinizing every aspect of him, clearly enjoying Heeseung's desperation. “Why? Y/N told me what happened on Monday. You’re a fucking asshole.”
“You don’t think I don’t know that? That’s why I’m here. Just let me in,” Heeseung said, his patience wearing thin.
“What’s in it for me?” Jake crossed his arms, raising an eyebrow. Heeseung could tell he was relishing the sight of him getting so desperate.
“You already got to fuck my girlfriend as many times as you wanted. Don’t you think that’s enough?” Heeseung gritted his teeth, his voice tight with anger.
Jake rolled his eyes but opened the door, letting Heeseung in. “You know she’s not your girlfriend anymore, right?”
If Heeseung wasn’t so determined to win you back, he would have had no issue punching Jake in the face again. But he needed Jake’s help, so he held back and tried his best it ignore him.
“I need your help,” Heeseung said, crossing his arms and facing Jake.
Jake barely glanced at him as he headed to the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of what Heeseung assumed was a protein shake. He started to shake it, more focused on his drink, acting almost as if Heeseung wasn’t even there. “You’re funny if you think I’m going to help you with anything.”
Heeseung sighed once again, watching Jake’s dismissive attitude. God, Jake was such a dick. “I know I fucked up.”
“Yeah? Took you long enough to realize.”
“I need help getting her back.” Jake let out a derisive snort that he didn’t even bother to hide.
“Holy shit, you’re delusional. What makes you think I’d help you?” Jake’s laughter was infuriating, and Heeseung started to regret coming here.
“Jake, I know what I did. I know there’s nothing that can fully make up for it, but I need Y/N back. I’m begging you, man, I need your help.” Heeseung’s pride was at rock bottom, but he didn’t care. If this was what he had to let go of to win back the love of his life, so be it.
“You literally cheated on her. Why the fuck would I help someone who cheated on her try to win her back? You don’t deserve her.” Heeseung couldn’t deny it anymore; he had emotionally cheated on you, whether he intended to or not and it sickened him to realize that he was responsible for your pain.
“I know I don’t deserve her, and I also realize what I did and how I’m responsible for everything. I know now that the last month before we broke up was terrible for her, and I was a complete asshole. I didn’t mean to hurt her; everything just spiraled so quickly that I didn’t have time to process it. I swear I’m not trying to make excuses—there aren’t any. But the last three months have been hell for me. You don’t understand how empty I’ve felt, how much it’s all hurt. Hearing that you two came back together from wherever you guys were fucked me up so badly that I ended up taking it out on you, and I’m sorry for that—it was fucked up. But what I’m trying to say is that this whole summer has made me realize just how much I need her. Seeing her again has only made that clearer. I should have listened to her that night, but I was so blinded by anger about you two that I lost control, and you have no idea how much I fucking regret it. Talking to her last week made me see just how badly I fucked up, and I guess I was too caught up in Karina’s lies to accept the truth. I know I don’t deserve her, but please, I just need one last chance to make things right.” Heeseung’s sincerity was evident in every word, and Jake could tell that this was something Heeseung had been tormenting himself over for a while.
“I don’t know what you want me to do,” Jake said honestly. “I don’t even know how I can help. This is between you two.”
He hadn’t expected Heeseung to lay everything out so openly, and he was a bit taken aback. But Jake still struggled to fully support Heeseung. He knew how miserable and broken you had been after the breakup, and he wasn’t sure he could let you go through something like that again.
“I just need her to know that I’m sorry and to hear me out just once more. I know I don’t deserve it, but please. This was all I thought about this entire week, and I don’t know what else to do. I mean I came all the way over here to you of all people because of how desperate I am. I know you don’t owe me anything, especially after everything, but please, I’m begging you. Help me out, man.” Heeseung’s eyes were filled with desperation, and Jake let out a sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration.
“Is Karina still in the picture?”
“Fuck no, and I made sure she understood. She’s literally the worst mistake I ever made, and I should’ve known better. I just didn’t think she’d take it this far, but I swear, there was nothing between us to begin with. She just caught me at a vulnerable time and took advantage of it. I fully acknowledge the mess I made in the month leading up to Y/N and me breaking up, and I know it’s probably too late now, but please, Jake. Y/N is the best thing that’s ever happened to me. You of all people should know that, so I can’t just let this go without trying one more time.”
Heeseung couldn’t even lift his head to face Jake anymore, his eyes focused on his trembling fingers. The shame of his actions weighed heavily on him, and admitting it all out loud took a lot out of him.
A few seconds of silence passed, and Heeseung assumed Jake was deliberating. With each passing second, his anxiety spiked, and he desperately wished Jake would say something, anything.
“Fuck, I can’t believe I’m saying this, but okay,” Jake said, his tone heavy with disbelief. Heeseung’s head snapped up, his eyes wide with shock. “There’s no guarantee this will even work, but I’ll try something. Just know that I’m not taking this lightly. If you mess it up again, I’ll fucking kill you. I’m not kidding. The moment I see Karina anywhere near you, you’re dead. I’m only doing this because I know how much you meant to her and how miserable she’s been without you.”
Heeseung’s smile stretched so wide it made his cheeks hurt, but he didn’t care. “Thank you so much. Seriously, thank you, man. I really owe you.”
“Yeah, whatever,” Jake said, rolling his eyes at how excited Heeseung was. “But if Y/N isn’t having it, there’s literally nothing else I can do. So don’t get your hopes up.”
“No, I get it. Seriously, thank you so much. And I’m genuinely sorry for everything. It was fucked up for me to fight you like that.” Heeseung wasn’t sure if things with their friend group would ever return to normal, but he’d be lying if he denied that he missed having his friends around. A small bit of him kind of hoped this might be a step in the right direction of maybe getting everything back to normal.
“Yeah, whatever. I guess I kind of deserved it for sleeping with your girl,” Jake said with a hint of sarcasm.
Okay, maybe Heeseung wasn’t entirely fine with Jake being around like before as he felt one of his eyes twitch in irritation at the reminder of Jake being in your bed all summer, but he pushed the thought aside. “Just don’t make it a habit.”
“We’ll see. Don’t fuck it up.”
Heeseung felt another twitch in his eye. Maybe he wasn’t entirely over the idea of killing Jake Sim.
You had been sort of in a weird state of limbo where it seemed that a part of you was still wallowing in the sadness that came after the whole fight with Heeseung in your apartment but also there was also a part of you that was just kind of irritated with everything and you weren’t sure how to get yourself free from this state.
And it seemed the latter was taking over your current state as you let out a grunt of frustration as you attempted to hit the ball over the net, only for it to get caught and cause you to lose. Shouts of amusement came from across the court as you sneered in annoyance.
“Ha! Dinner’s on you! Oh, princess you fucking suck at this.” Jake was a little too happy about your loss as he giggled around the court.
Sweat drenched the both of you as the setting sun’s heat blazed relentlessly down the two of you. “You know that I’m usually good! You’re just better today I guess.”
You sheepishly shrugged before chugging your water from your water bottle on the side, the cold liquid instantly quenching your thirst. You were so ready to leave and get food.
“You just got unlucky that Sunghoon wasn’t here. There’s no doubt he’d be buying dinner. I’ve never seen someone worse at pickleball than he is.” You both let out a small laugh thinking about your mutual friend and his lack of athleticism.
"Yeah, honestly, I know he said he was sick or something, but I bet he just said that to dodge paying for dinner," you muttered, tossing your keys at Jake after packing up your paddle and balls. "You're driving, though."
He caught the keys without protest, shrugging as he followed you to the car. After unlocking it, he slid into the driver’s seat, immediately grimacing. “Jesus, what the fuck is this seat positioning?”
“Leave me alone, it’s my car,” you rolled your eyes, watching as he adjusted the seat to his liking.
“Too nice of a car for such a shitty driver like you,” he snorted, making you gasp in offense.
But before you could fire anything back, he quickly switched the subject. "So, who's Ryujin going on a date with tonight?"
"Some new European exchange student, I think his name’s Armand? Not sure, but I’m pretty sure he’s French."
"Where the hell is she finding all these European guys?" Jake shook his head.
Pickleball was usually a doubles match with you, Jake, Sunghoon, and Ryujin, but Sunghoon had bailed, claiming he was sick (though you weren’t convinced), and Ryujin was off on her date.
"I think he's in her finance class—or at least that’s what Yujin said. But yeah, she clearly has a type," you snorted, sending Ryujin a quick text to see how the date was going.
"That’s an understatement. I’m surprised she got over Louis that fast. And how the hell does Yujin still know everything about everyone despite being abroad for a whole semester?"
The circle you and your family had always been surrounded by was small, a natural outcome of the exclusive lifestyle the upper echelon of society led—one not easily accessible to just anyone. This circle was even tighter at your school, where everyone with status seemed to gravitate. As soon as someone new entered the fold, it took only a few days for word to spread, and soon enough, everyone knew everything about them, especially if they came from a similarly privileged background. So it was no surprise that even after studying abroad in Italy for 6 months, Yujin still managed to stay in the loop.
“You know you don’t actually have to be on campus to keep up with everything,” you sighed, rolling your eyes.
It was frustrating, sometimes even invasive, to know that every move you made was watched and analyzed, but it seemed to be the price you and your friends paid for the lives you led.
Jake hummed in agreement, and for a few moments, the car was uncharacteristically quiet. It was unusual—Jake was never one to keep his mouth shut, so his silence could only mean one thing.
"Ugh, what?" you groaned, turning your phone off and shifting your focus to his profile.
Jake shot you a brief look of confusion before turning his attention back to the road. "What?"
"Just spit it out." You knew all too well that when Jake went quiet, it meant he was holding back something important—and more often than not, it wasn’t good news.
He gave you another glance, this one doing nothing to ease the knot forming in your stomach, before letting out a long sigh. "So, the other day, someone came to see me."
You raised an eyebrow, sensing that he was trying to drag this out. It couldn’t be good. "Oh my God, just tell me already. Who was it?"
Jake took a few more seconds before finally answering. “Heeseung.”
Your ex’s name was the last thing you expected to hear. “What?”
“Yeah, someone knocked, and when I opened the door, there he was, just standing there.” Jake’s slow pace was driving you insane—you just wanted him to get to the point.
“Just tell me what he wanted. Did he try to fight you again? Because I swear to God—”
“No! No, it wasn’t anything like that. He didn’t come to start anything; he just asked for a favor.” Jake nervously bit his lip, his fingers drumming against the steering wheel. He clearly didn’t want to tell you what Heeseung was really after.
“Jake, just get to the fucking point. What did he ask for?”
“Okay fine, he wanted me to talk to you about maybe hearing him out again.” Jake grimaced as he revealed Heeseung's request, sensing that the silence on your end was not a good sign. “Ugh, please Y/N, say something.”
You didn’t know if you should be fuming or surprised. Maybe both. “What did you say?”
Your calm tone caught Jake off guard as he turned into the Thai restaurant you’d chosen for dinner, parking before facing you. “Okay, you can’t be mad, but I agreed.”
Your mouth opened in protest, anger filling your eyes, but he rushed on before you could interrupt. “Just listen. You know me—I wouldn’t agree to something like this, especially with him, unless I really thought he deserved it. After I listened to him, I could see how genuine he was. I know he was a dick on Monday, but he came to me desperate and genuinely sorry. He wouldn’t have approached me of all people if he wasn’t serious.I know how much he hurt you, but I also see how unhappy you are without him. This might not be the worst thing for you two. Plus, Karina’s definitely out of the picture—Heeseung looked furious talking about her and promised he wouldn’t associate with her again.”
You processed everything slowly, staring at Jake. “He hurt me so bad,” was all you could manage as you shook your head, struggling to accept what your best friend was telling you.
Jake’s eyes softened at your reaction. “I know, Y/N. He’s still a total asshole, but deep down, you know that not having him around hurts even more. I didn’t promise him anything, and I won’t ever force you to talk to him. Honestly, if I had my way, I’d keep him far away from you. But I know you, and I see how badly all this unresolved feeling is fucking with you. I don’t want that for you. So just know this is an option. It doesn’t have to be now, or next week, or even this month. But if you ever feel ready to talk to him again—especially now that it seems like you both understand what happened—he’s willing to apologize. I’ll even be there with you if you want.”
Jake was right, and you hated that. Deep down, you knew this unresolved pain would eat you alive. Heeseung had always been part of your life, and having him ripped away, even for just a couple of months, was agonizing. You didn’t know if you could just cut him out completely, so you slowly nodded. “Okay.”
Heeseung honestly had little faith that Jake would keep his promises, but he still held onto a sliver of hope. Yet, as the weeks passed with no word from you, that hope began to dwindle. After a month had gone by without any communication, he was on the verge of accepting that he had ruined the most important thing in his life. Just as he was about to let it go, fortune finally smiled on him: he spotted you outside, nervously biting your lip as you waited for his class to end. A grin spread across his face the moment your eyes met, and he walked toward you.
“Hey,” he greeted softly.
His smile made your heart race, and it was annoying to realize that he still had that effect on you after everything that had happened. “Hey, I was wondering if you were busy. I think I’m ready to talk.”
Heeseung mentally noted to give Jake the biggest thank you ever. Despite his doubts about Jake's ability to follow through, he couldn't be more grateful to be proven wrong.
“Yeah, of course. This is my last class of the day,” he said, eagerly nodding as you both walked out of the building.
“Oh great, I wasn’t sure about your schedule, so I was just hoping I got lucky and you were free.” The awkward tension between you was palpable. “Do you want to grab lunch? I can drive if you didn’t.”
“Yeah, that sounds perfect. Jay drove us today, but I’ll just text him that he doesn’t have to worry about me.” Heeseung couldn’t help the smile spreading across his face. It was amazing how much your presence lifted his spirits. You were like a ray of sunshine, and just being able to look at you felt pretty fucking incredible.
You shot him a small smile before nodding, leading him to your car. “Okay, perfect.”
The ride to the restaurant was quiet, with barely any words exchanged until you both placed your orders.
Knowing that silence would make everything feel pointless, you mustered the courage to clear your throat and initiate the conversation. “Jake told me you really wanted to talk to me again.”
Heeseung nodded without hesitation. “Yeah, I’m not going to lie, I really didn’t think he’d actually help, but I’m so glad he did. I hope you didn’t feel forced or anything—that’s the last thing I want. If you ever feel that way during this conversation, I would completely understand if you just walked away.”
You nodded, recognizing the sincerity in his words. It gave you reassurance about his intentions. “I wasn’t forced or anything, but it did take some time. Honestly, I didn’t want to hear you out again, especially since last time ended badly. But I’ve had time to think, and I’ve come to the conclusion that I need to do this, at least for myself, to move forward from everything.”
“I’m really glad you gave me a chance to talk to you again. Y/N, I know this might not mean much to you, but I truly want to say I’m sorry.” Heeseung sighed before continuing, “I’ve had time to reflect on everything, and I’ve realized that what I did was unfair to you and hurt you in ways I never intended. None of this was your fault, and I’m so sorry for putting you through that.”
Hearing those words felt like a wave of relief washed over your aching heart. It was as if you had been yearning to hear him acknowledge your pain, and his sincere apology felt like a crucial step toward healing. Yet, one lingering question held you back.
“Why did you do it?” you asked softly, almost afraid to voice it. You noticed Heeseung’s eyes soften at your words.
He sat in silence, contemplating your question. Why had he abandoned you during the last month of your relationship?
“I’m not sure,” he blinked, his brow furrowing in distress. “I know that’s not a good enough answer, but honestly, I don’t even think I understand it myself. I really don’t want this to sound like an excuse, but I didn’t realize what was happening until it was too late. That project consumed so much of my time, and unfortunately, that meant spending all those hours with Karina. It became a routine, and I thought it would help me finish the class with a good grade. I never stopped to consider if Karina had ulterior motives, and I’m so sorry—I never thought about how this would affect you.”
You were unsure how to process his words, but you appreciated his honesty and let him continue. “I didn’t mean to blow you off or prioritize the project, which ended up meaning prioritizing Karina over you. That was never my intention. I hope you understand that I never saw her as a replacement or thought she was better than you in any way, especially not romantically. I swear nothing happened between us until after you left for your trip. Even then, I was just so angry, and she happened to be there. She was only an outlet for my frustration, and I know that’s probably not what you want to hear, but I can’t deny that something happened. I just need you to know that aside from the physical, there was nothing else with her.”
Heeseung grimaced as he admitted all this. The weight of his actions felt unbearable, and when he saw your face—so sad, struggling to hold it together—it made him feel even worse. He hated that he was the cause of your pain.
You nodded slowly, your chest tightening as you absorbed his words and another sigh left your mouth. “That last month was so unbearable for me. It was literally hell. You have no idea how many nights I spent blaming myself, thinking I drove you to another girl. But what hurt even more was the aftermath. I’ve known you for so long, and I never realized how much you meant to my life until you were just… gone. I felt so lost without you.”
“It was the same for me. Y/N, you’ve been the love of my life since we were kids. You’ve always been my dream and literally everyone around us knows how much you’ve always meant to me. I’ve dated around and hooked up with other people but at the end of the day, I just kept coming back to you. You’re everything I’ve ever wanted. You’re my home. That’s why I had to take this chance—to see you again, to beg you to hear me out one last time.” His voice trembled, and a tear slipped down your cheek as you felt the weight of his desperation. Your heart ached, torn between the pain of the past and the flicker of hope in his eyes.
He reached over to take your hand in his, the warmth of his familiar touch sending a jolt through you. A small, hopeful smile broke through his anxiety. “I love you, Y/N. I truly believe you’re it for me. But if you need me to let you go, I’ll do it. I’d do anything to see you happy.”
“Heeseung…” The words barely escaped your lips before tears started streaming down your cheeks. You couldn’t hold back your emotions, even in this crowded place. His confession pierced through the defenses you had built, reaching deep into the empty spaces you didn’t even know existed. You remembered all the pain he had caused, the scars still fresh, and yet, despite everything, he was still your Heeseung. Your heart ached with the undeniable truth that he was your destined other half, and you couldn’t bring yourself to let him go completely.
In that moment, amidst the whirlwind of your emotions, the right path became unmistakably clear. You took a deep breath, feeling the weight of your feelings shift into something resolute. With trembling hands, you squeezed his. This wasn’t just about forgiveness; it was about embracing the possibility of healing together. “I can’t let you go, not now,” you whispered, your voice thick with emotion. “Let’s find our way back.”
No one had ever warned you how difficult it truly was to rebuild something broken, even with someone you’d known your entire life. But now, standing on the other side of that struggle, as you watched the pieces of your relationship with Heeseung slowly fall back into place, you realized that every effort had been worth it. The awkward silences, the tentative steps, and the raw vulnerability—it had all led to this unexpected peace. Months ago, you would’ve laughed if someone told you not only that you’d be back together, but that you’d be more in love with Heeseung than ever before. Yet, against all odds, here you were—more sure of him, more connected, and somehow, more in love than you ever thought possible.
It had been two weeks since that lunch, two weeks since you both decided to give things another shot. Although hesitation still hung between you, trust was slowly rebuilding, and you could feel the progress with every passing day. The real breakthrough came when you got solid proof that Karina was no longer a looming threat. It seemed that Heeseung’s rejection hit her harder than anyone expected, leading her to pack up and flee to her family’s summer home in Lake Como. Word spread quickly that she was taking a semester off to “heal” from all the so-called negative toxicity, but honestly, you couldn’t care less. And it seemed that it wasn’t just you—everyone in your circle seemed to be rejoicing the second her plane left the tarmac, collectively exhaling as though they’d been holding their breath for months. Her departure felt like the final nail in the coffin of a drama that had dragged on far too long, and for the first time in a while, you felt truly free from the chaos.
You and Heeseung had agreed to take things slow, both afraid to fuck up the fragile foundation of your newly rekindled relationship. While you often found yourself holding back more than you were used to, the fresh start was also exciting, like falling in love all over again. The honeymoon phase was in full swing, and honestly, you were soaking it up. So much so that it seemed your entire friend group—finally restored, thank God (you were sure you’d even seen Jay shed a tear when he was reunited with Sunghoon)—was playfully revolting at how inseparable you and Heeseung had become. But despite the jokes, everyone was genuinely thrilled to see you two back together. Even the soft launch on Instagram stirred enough commotion that your mom called, confused. But you didn’t care about anyone’s reactions, because for the first time in a long time, you were truly happy.
“I’m surprised your little purse dog isn’t with you,” Yujin’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts as she appeared out of nowhere, making you jump.
“What?” You shot her a confused look.
“Heeseung! He’s like your own little purse dog these days. I don’t think I’ve seen you two apart since you got back together,” she teased, giving you a smug grin before snatching your drink from your hand and taking a big swig.
You snatched it right back, rolling your eyes. “That is not true!”
But the grin on your face betrayed you—you knew exactly what she meant.
Your half-hearted attempts to deny her claims were cut short when yet another voice chimed in, startling you once again. "Nah, Yujin's right. You two are capital C clingy."
"Stop sneaking up on me!" you groaned, shaking your head at both Ryujin and Yujin. They, of course, found your irritation hilarious. Before you could protest further, Ryujin also reached over and grabbed your drink, taking a long sip without hesitation.
"Oh my God, just take it!" you exclaimed, shaking your head in disbelief. You turned to grab a fresh cup, already resigned to making yourself another drink.
"But seriously, where is Heeseung?" Ryujin asked, glancing around the packed house, her eyes scanning the crowd for your boyfriend.
Jake had thrown a party to celebrate Karina’s dramatic exit, and it seemed like everyone you knew had shown up. His place was absolutely massive so it was insane to see the entire place bursting with people, not a single corner empty.
You shrugged as you added ice to your drink. "Not sure, I saw Jay dragging him out to the pool. I think they’re playing beer pong. You guys do realize we haven’t been together every second, right?”
Yujin scoffed. "You sure about that?t At least from what I’ve been seeing I’m having a hard time believing that."
“Yeah, babe, I don’t think there’s been a single day this week you haven’t been with him,” Ryujin added. But when she noticed a slight frown tugging at your lips, she quickly backpedaled. “But that’s not a bad thing! You guys are back together, and honestly, you seem so much happier and more in love. We’re happy for you.”
Yujin nodded in agreement. “Yeah, it’s cute. Almost sickeningly so. But seriously, we’re all just glad you two are happy again.”
Right on cue, you felt a familiar arm wrap around your waist from behind. You knew instantly who it was. “Aww, that’s so sweet, Yujin. Glad we have your support,” Heeseung teased, reaching out to fist-bump her.
"Were you out playing beer pong?" you asked, glancing up at Heeseung.
He nodded with a grin. "Yeah, Sunghoon and I absolutely annihilated Jay and Jake. Those two suck every single time, but they keep teaming up like they’ve got something to prove. Not that I’m complaining—it just means we keep winning. The loser had to admit the other’s dog was better, and Sunghoon had Jake practically in tears, saying Gaeul was superior to Layla. It was almost cruel. Layla’s literally upstairs, and he ran right up to apologize to her."
Ryujin snorted. "You guys are such kids. What kind of punishment even is that?"
"Hey, I’ll have you know that when it comes to Gaeul, I’d put my fucking life on the line for her!" Sunghoon appeared out of nowhere, clearly having overheard the mention of his beloved dog.
"Yeah, don’t mess with his dog. It’s, like, actually serious for him," Heeseung added, backing up his friend with a smirk.
You couldn’t help but smile. It felt so good to have everyone back together, the easy banter flowing like it always had. The boys, especially, had clearly missed each other. Things were a bit tense between Heeseung and Jake at first, but once Sunghoon and Jay rejoined the group, it felt like no time had passed at all. Of course, Heeseung wasted no time making it clear that you were off-limits now, even threatening that he’d shave Jake’s hair off if he so much as thought about crossing that line—and judging by Jake’s face, it was a threat he took seriously.
As Sunghoon passionately defended his dog, you felt Heeseung's arm tighten around your waist. He leaned in, his breath hot against your ear, sending a shiver down your spine. “I don’t know about you, but I can think of something way better than listening to Sunghoon go on about his dog’s honor,” he whispered, his voice laced with mischief. “How about we check out one of the way-too-many bedrooms upstairs?”
The suggestion came with that familiar cheeky tone, and you didn’t need any convincing. Without a word, the two of you quietly slipped away from the group, who were still caught up in their conversation about pets. Heeseung was right—there were far too many rooms in this house, but luckily you knew exactly where to find a quiet, empty one.
Your body hadn’t even fully crossed the threshold before Heeseung captured your lips with a fervor you hadn’t felt since Hyunjin’s party. When you said that you and Heeseung were committed to taking your relationship slowly, you truly meant it. Sure, the two of you had made it to third base, but you had intentionally held back from rushing into sex, wanting to protect the delicate balance of your relationship. Yet, in that moment, it was clear that neither of you was opposed to going all the way. You both had been holding back for far too long.
Shutting the door behind you, he slammed you flat against the it as his tongue explored inside your mouth. You were panting against his lips as you reached for his clothes. It was obvious neither of you were particularly interested in taking it slow.
“God you’re so fucking hot,” Heeseung didn't hold back his groan as his hand pulled your top over your breasts and cupped one in his hand, groping it as he deepened the kiss. You scratched a hand against the nape of his neck eliciting another low groan from him while his lips trailed down from your lips down to your neck. His touches had never felt better and you were yearning to feel him closer and deeper.
While his lips worked their way down, you didn’t waste any time pulling your leather pants down, revealing the same pair of black thongs that you had been wearing the last time the two of you had sex and Heeseung groaned against your skin once he realized.
“Fuck, you’re going to be the death of me.” You giggled at his response and quickly tugged him towards the bed, leaving behind a trail of clothes as the two of you continued to get rid of your clothes until you were left bare.
Your hands firmly gripped his shoulders once he had finally stripped and you pushed him down on the bed as you also went down on your knees. His mouth was slightly agape as his eyes twinkled at the realization of what was happening.
“I’ve missed your cock so bad,” you purred before letting a wad of spit fall from your mouth and straight on his rock-hard dick.
His eyes instantly rolled back when your hands wrapped themselves around his length and worked their way up and down, adopting a steady tempo. Your eyes never left his face as you held a determined look in your eyes, eager to please him.
“Fuck, just like that,” Heeseung barely managed to pant out as his eyes connected with yours.
You couldn’t hold back a smile. Knowing that your touches had him falling apart like this in pleasure had you growing overcome with lust. There was not a better sight than the one in front of you and you couldn’t break away from witnessing his every reaction even as you slowly started to lick his tip.
He was panting hard as he watched you lick up and down his shaft before swirling your tongue around his sensitive tip that was dripping with precum. And when you sunk down, allowing his dick to find its place in your warm tight throat, his hands went straight to the back of your head, pushing you further down and inciting you to choke on his length.
It’d been a while since you’d deep-throated anything and you felt the tears instantly prick at your eyes as you gagged around his thick cock. You concentrated hard, closing your eyes to ease your throat as you slowly started to bob your head.
Saliva escaped down the corners of your mouth as the tears were now fully escaping your eyes. The filthy sounds of you gagging filled the room along with Heeseung’s deep grunts. His hands were fully pushing your head down as he thrust up, yearning for you to take him deeper. You tried your best to swallow around his as you searched for air, but he was relentless and pushed you until you couldn’t take anymore and had to slap the sides of his thighs for respite.
“Jesus Christ, Heeseung!” You gasped for air before coughing when he finally let you go, realizing how brutal he had been treating your throat.
“Shit, sorry,” his eyes were wide as he reached for your face, pushing your sweat-drenched hair away from your face. “It’s been so long and you felt so good, I’m so sorry-”
“Shut up,” you shook your head as you pushed him back on the bed. You ignored his apologies and quickly got on top of him, ignoring the fact that you had just been brutally choking on your boyfriend’s dick.
You were already dripping wet and Heeseung’s eyes couldn’t take his eyes away from your glistening pussy hovering over his dick. His hands guided themselves to your hips and you slowly teased him as you rubbed the tip of his dick at your entrance.
“Please,” he pleaded desperately and that was all you needed to hear before you slowly sunk yourself down his length.
The two of you let out groans and you couldn’t help but heavily pant as you went lower, feeling him deeper in you. You felt so full that it felt like you could feel him all the way up your throat. Heeseung was massive and despite having loads of experience riding him, every time it felt like almost too much for you as your body felt like it was being stretched beyond its limit.
“Fuck, you’re too big,” you whimpered as you felt your body slumping over his, trying your best to get adjusted to his side.
His mouth found yours as he passionately kissed you while his hands found your breasts, rolling your nipples between his fingers. “You’re taking me so well princess.”
As he praised you, you found yourself slowly attempting to move your hips and before you knew it, you were moaning against his lips as you moved up and down his length. The pleasure was overwhelming and you couldn’t stop. The stretch still stung, but the pleasure that came with it was more than anything you could’ve asked for.
“Heeseung,” you moaned out loudly as his hips thrust up to meet yours, forcing you to feel him deeper.
The room was filled with your wanton moans that didn’t stop chanting his name and the sounds of his balls slapping roughly against your pussy. His grunts were getting animalistic and before you knew it, he had flipped the two of you over changing the position and taking over.
‘Oh my God!” You screeched as he moved your legs to hang over his shoulders, causing the new position to allow him to reach you deeper if that was even possible.
He relentlessly pounded against your sweet spot, “You feel so fucking good. Perfect pussy made just for me.”
His dirty talk had you whimpering and you found yourself reaching down for your clit quickly rubbing it, helping you reach your orgasm faster.
“I’m almost there don’t stop,” you instructed, and with a couple more hard thrusts, you found yourself loudly crying out as you found yourself reaching your peak.
You clung to him tightly as you rode out your orgasm and could feel him twitch inside you before also cumming closely after. He filled you to the brim with his cum as you limply laid there taking everything he gave you. Once he was finished, he slowly pulled out inciting a small whimper from you and you could feel all his cum slowly pouring out of you and down your leg.
Heeseung, seemingly just as worn out as you were, plopped right next to you before pulling you close to him, cuddling you. A huge smile formed on your face as you turned your head to face him and kiss him, someone pounded on the door.
“You two are so fucked for that! You do realize Layla’s room is right next door!”
Bonus:
It was unbelievable how fast time had flown, especially now, standing with all your closest friends in matching caps and gowns. You couldn’t help but marvel at the fact that you’d all made it through college in one piece, still tight-knit as ever. It was almost enough to bring you to tears—if you weren’t so distracted by how uncomfortable your dress had become under your gown. You kept fidgeting, trying to adjust it for a bit of relief.
“Stop wrinkling your dress!” your mother scolded, while busy straightening Jake’s tie.
“But no one’s even going to see the tie under the gown,” Jake whined, only for your mom to shoot him a stern look that silenced him immediately as she returned to perfecting his outfit.
True to her word, your mom had finally gotten Jake head to toe in one of her custom pieces (minus the cap and gown). “I don’t care if anyone sees it or not. You are not wearing one of my designs without it being flawless,” she insisted, focused on making sure everything was perfect.
You could hear the quiet snickers behind you, and without even turning around, you knew Sunghoon and Ryujin were loving every second of this. They had already survived your mother’s meticulous once-over and were now relishing in watching the rest of you squirm under her scrutiny.
"Yeah, come on Jake, stop being so fussy. You should be grateful she's even doing this for you," Heeseung chimed in, grinning. His playful jab at Jake was laced with just enough sweetness to win over your mom—or at least, that was the plan.
Your mom still hadn’t entirely forgiven Heeseung for the disaster he caused at her garden party, and her approval of your rekindled relationship was, at best, tentative. But it was clear she was slowly warming up, especially with the way Heeseung never missed a chance to flatter her.
“Alright, now you look presentable. Don’t you dare mess with it during the ceremony,” your mom finally declared, stepping back to give Jake a final once-over. She then turned her sharp gaze on the rest of you, making sure everyone else met her high standards.
You exchanged a glance with Sunghoon and Ryujin, who were both barely holding in their laughter. They clearly found your mom’s unofficial role as wardrobe enforcer far more amusing from the sidelines.
“Oh, you all look so beautiful,” your mother said, her smile softening in a way you weren’t used to. The warmth in her gaze caught you off guard, and suddenly, the stuffiness of your dress was the last thing on your mind. As your eyes met hers, the reality of the moment hit you—graduation day, surrounded by your closest friends, all of you about to step into the next chapter of your lives. You could feel the emotions welling up, tears prickling at the corners of your eyes as you took in the sight of everyone in their caps and gowns.
Heeseung, as if sensing your shift in mood, gently tugged your hand into his, threading your fingers together. He squeezed your hand and gave you a reassuring smile, grounding you just when you needed it most.
“Come on, let’s take a picture before we leave,” you suggested, grabbing Heeseung's hand and motioning to your friends.
Your group huddled close, arms draped over each other, laughter bubbling up as your mom snapped away on her phone. Heeseung’s arm stayed firmly around your waist, keeping you close while you smiled for the camera. The joy of the moment, the closeness of your friends, felt like the perfect snapshot of how far you had all come.
As soon as the last picture was taken, everyone started to drift toward the stadium for the commencement ceremony. You watched as the crowd began to gather under the soft glow of the setting sun. After a quick hug and goodbye to your mom, you turned to follow your friends toward the entrance gates.
Just before you could step through the gates, Heeseung gently pulled you aside, his fingers brushing your arm. He leaned in close, his breath warm against your ear as he whispered, “I couldn’t have done any of this without you. I’m proud of us.”
His words made your heart swell, emotions bubbling up in a way that almost took your breath away. You looked up at him, your smile soft and full of everything you’d been through together. “I am too,” you whispered back, a mixture of relief and joy filling your chest. “We made it.”
The air was cool, a gentle breeze lifting the corners of your graduation gown as you looked at Heeseung, remembering how uncertain things had once seemed. But now? Everything felt like it was finally falling into place. The obstacles and heartbreak had only made you both stronger.
As the sun began to set, Heeseung took your hand again, just like in the room earlier. This time, though, he brought it to his lips, brushing a light kiss across your knuckles before pulling you closer.
“I love you,” he said quietly, and it wasn’t a grand declaration—just a simple truth that felt completely genuine.
“I love you too,” you answered, your heart full.
Standing there, wrapped in each other’s arms, the future didn’t seem so intimidating anymore. It was uncertain, sure, but with Heeseung beside you, you felt ready for whatever was next.
TAGLIST: @notevenheretbh1 @leov3rse @slut4hee @llvrhee @simjungwon @lhspeachie @sakanelli-afc @rayofsunshineeee @deobitifull @iwaplant @mheretoreadff @farashawhee @skzenhalove @venfl-ifw @jaehoonii @melonvrs @enhastolemyheart @rainyjy @cha0thicpisces @love-be0m @niniissus
#enhypen#enhypen scenarios#enhypen x reader#heeseung#heeseung x reader#heeseung scenarios#enhypen smut#heeseung smut#enhypen imagines#enhypen au#heeseung imagines#fic: psily
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i crave more mob boss!wolverine
𝗢𝗙𝗙𝗜𝗖𝗜𝗔𝗟𝗟𝗬 𝗖𝗟𝗔𝗜𝗠𝗘𝗗
pairing: possessive mob-boss!logan howlett x stripper!reader
warnings: kidnapping, forced working, strangers to lovers, stripping, spoiling, grinding, breast play, tit sucking, riding, orgasm, possessiveness, rough fucking, claiming, etc.
summary: y/n had no idea who the top boss was and what he wanted from her. She soon found out during an unexpected requested private dance.
note: Logan is a man who’s going to mark his grounds. He’s very territorial. Reading this story will make you understand…
———
How do you guys feel about a x men story with reader? Logan being rude Logan at first, then slowly shows small affection towards the reader. Jealousy and things of that sort. They soon hit it off, and after Logan starts acting rude again, because he’s scared of the love he grew for her. It’ll be a long story, but something to read at night. ALL ON WATTPAD! Comment below, please!
———
Working at a strip club was one thing when y/n first started the job. She was uncomfortable, but the ladies had made her feel welcomed.
Working for a mob boss was another; this time, she had to work whether she was comfortable or not. She tried talking to her boss, but his boss was the one who said she needed to relocate. There was no arguing.
Y/n tried to quit that day and soon found out how dangerous this man was. A few men had broken into her apartment, taking the lady with a fight.
She pled for help, but the people in the apartment knew whose men they were. They quickly went back into their own space and minded their business.
She now lives in a nightclub unwillingly. She wasn’t trusted by the top boss, so he made her stay where she would always be supervised.
This club was different than the last one she had worked at. It was bigger, cleaner, seemed more expensive, and the work she had to do was harder. She had never given private dances, but with her new schedule, she had to.
She’d never met the boss before. She demanded almost every day, but for months, Logan had sat back and ignored her requests.
When she first started at the other club, he hadn’t paid any attention to her because he had other things to worry about, but after he noticed her growth and the business she brought in, he decided to pay attention to her.
That meant he watched her dance, watched her have fun with the other girls, had people surveillance her outside of work, and maybe he’d do it himself if he had time.
The woman grew onto the man, so much, he couldn’t ignore her. He’d think and ask about her every day until too he finally told her boss, the man who worked for him, that she’d be relocating to his top club.
Y/n couldn’t lie and say she wasn’t being treated right occasionally. Her dances cost more, the private dances could pay her old rent, and she would get a daily allowance from the mysterious boss, which was double what she made in a week.
Anytime she thought about running away and making the higher-ups upset, she would sit back and think about her life, and the money.
She had no idea if this man was capable of killing her, and why would she run away from a job that gave her so much money, she could buy literally anything she wanted.
Y/n didn’t know this, but Logan would never harm a soul. Especially her. If she were to run away, he’d simply get her back.
“How long is this dance?” Y/n sighed as she walked in front of one of the VIP doors that was guarded more than usual. Usually, there are only two being on each side of the door, but tonight, the whole hallway was full of security guards.
“As long as he says,” the man replied to her with no facial expression. Y/n rolled her eyes as she opened the door to go in.
Once she got in, she saw a man in a chair, facing the other way. He was smoking a cigar and had a bottle of hard liquor sitting on the coffee table next to him.
Y/n closed the door before dimming the lights. She had no idea who this man was, as always, but she still continued her work.
Y/n pressed a button on the wall which turned on music for her. Her own playlist that she made to make her work against her will.
Logan, the boss would never allow any of his workers to do this, but for y/n, he exuded it. He wanted to make her feel comfortable without giving her up. That is why he gives her an allowance. Steppers don’t get an allowance from the boss.
“How do you want this session to go, baby?” Y/n asked as she came up behind the man, touching his shoulders softly as her lips slightly grazed his ear. The smell of her this close smelled amazing to the man.
“Touchy and slow,” the man said, making the girl walk around him until she was in front of him. “Good choice,” she smirked, knowing those are the best-paying sessions.
Y/n took a few steps away from the man and began stripping, slowly. She had this tight dress on she had never worn before. He picked that out for her.
“Slower,” he demanded in a soft and low voice. Y/n listened, pulling the straps from her shoulder as slowly as she could go with the music she had chosen.
Once y/n got the dress off, she turned around, showing off her body to the man. He had also picked the lingerie. He knew she’d look stunning in it.
“C’mere,” he said as he sat his cigar down and shifted in his chair. Y/n slowly turned around and walked towards the man who patted his lap.
“Sit,” he said, and she did as told, putting her knees on both sides of his outer thighs. “You can touch anywhere that’s not clothed,” y/n said as the man slowly placed his hands on her ass cheeks, gripping the slightly.
“Ain’t that so?” He softly chuckled as she began grinding her hips. “Mhm hm,” she hummed as she placed her hands on the man’s shoulders.
“What if I tell you I’m a special request? — A special guest,” he said, making her lean into his ear. “Then you’ll have to talk to my boss about a price change,” she said, knowing most don’t.
The man laughed as he softly traced his hands u the girl's body until she cupped her cheek, making her look into his eyes.
He was one of the best-looking customers she’s had. Tall, dark, handsome, muscular, actually smelled good, and the way he touched her almost seemed like soft and careful loving touches.
“Maybe I will,” he said, making her heart skip a beat. “I-I don’t know if he’ll allow it though,” y/n tried lying, and he knew that. “And why would that be, Bub?” The man asked as she kept grinding on him with soft but rough touches on his chest and shoulders.
“I don’t know,” she replied, making him chuckle again. “Lemme ask him real quick,” the man said before he closed his eyes shut. Y/n stopped her movement, confused about what he was doing.
She went to speak until his eyes finally opened. “He said, I can,” Logan answered for himself. “I don’t think that's how it works, baby,” y/n giggled, finding the man funny.
“Oh, but I do, Bub,” the man said as his hands slowly traced up her body until his fingers hugged into her bra. “Hey, if you wanna good session, you gotta follow the rules-“ Before she could say anything, the man ripped her bra off, clean.
Y/n let out a short scream as she covered herself up. “That’s it — Get out!” Y/n went to get up, but he gripped her waist tightly, keeping her in place.
“Why is that?” He asked with a smirk, liking how defensive she got. “If you don’t leave, I’m gonna call the boss,” she said, making him chuckle. She had no clue. She was about to find out.
“Told you, he said it was alright,” Logan said, making the girl give him a face of confusion. She was confused and thought to herself until it clicked in her head. He was the boss.
That’s why he had so many guards outside of the VIP room. That’s why she was requested to wear a certain outfit. She was dancing for the boss.
“O-Oh, sorry, I — I didn’t know,” y/n said, still keeping her breast covered, but had lightened up her body, trying to relax more so she wouldn’t lose her job. Yes, she’s thought about escaping, but with the money. I’d he fired her and kicked her out, she wouldn’t get the money.
“All good, darling. Just wanting to surprise my favorite girl,” Logan said, hands softly grabbing her wrist to pull them away from her chest. She fought back for a second, but soon let him do what he wanted.
“Good girl — Too pretty to be coverin’ up in front of me,” he said as both of his hands cupped her chest, massaging them with kindness. He wanted her comfortable before he brought out the man he was.
“I-I know I work for you, b-but I don’t usually do this,” y/n stuttered as the man’s fingers pinched and played with both of her nipples slowly.
“Mhm hm,” he hummed, fixated on making something spark in her, and he soon did. A small moan escaped her mouth after she parted her lips. It was hard to hide how good his touch felt.
“Logan- Mister Howlett,” y/n corrected herself, trying to come out of respect, but it’s not like he’d get rid of her. She could punch him right now, and he’d keep her. He’d shit shows her the consequences of those actions.
“Can call me Logan, Bub,” the man said right before he latched his mouth around one of the girl's nipples. Y/n moaned lightly, hands flying to his hair to tug on, but not away.
“Oh, fuck,” was all she could say as she started on the man again. If this was another man, she would’ve been fought, but with him, she couldn’t bring himself to. He played with her too well.
Logan groaned onto the girl's chest, sensing vibrations through her body as his hands tried to her panties until he ripped them off clean, just like her bra.
“Gonna listen to your boss, baby?” Logan asked in between his sucks. “Y-Yes, sir,” she whined as she leaned her head back. “Good girl,” Logan groaned as he pulled back and shifted under her.
“You’re a tasty little thing, but still a hard ass,“ Logan said, making the girl's heart pump. “I-I’m sorry. I’ll be good. I promise,” y/n felt like she was begging, and she was. Who knew how much she actually needed this job, and how much she needed him.
“Oh, yes, you will, because you got a lot of making up to do for me,” Logan said as he finally got his cock out of his jeans. Y/n’s sucked in a low breath at the size and sight of him.
He was huge. He was hard. He was leaking. He was hurting. He’s needed y/n for a while, and she’s about to find that out. “Ride me, Bub,”
Y/n was hesitant, but managed to lift herself up, allowing Logan to shift his body under her so she was right aligned with him.
“Listen to me, baby, or you’ll regret it,” Logan quickly changed his attitude, which didn’t alarm y/n in a bad way. It was actually making her more wet than she already was.
“Y-Yes, sir,” she stuttered again before he slowly sunk down onto the man. “F-Fuck,” y/n quickly winced at the pain. He stretched her quicker than she’d ever been stretched before.
“That’s it, baby — Get me all in,” Logan placed his hands on her waist to guide her down quicker. Y/n clenched around the man. She even twitched.
“Ah huh,” the man breathed out as she finally got every inch of him inside of her with a slight eye cross. She had felt the knot in her stomach built in an instant.
“Start movin, Bub,” Logan spoke in a warning tone, making sure she knew he didn’t want to take any type of time with this. “I paid for this session,” the man added.
Y/n placed her hands back on the man’s shoulders to help herself before she began bouncing slowly. Cunt gripping his pulsing rock-hard cock as.
“Fuuck,” the man groaned as he threw his head back. “So fucking tight,” the man admitted as she whined. It didn’t take long for her wetness to coat his cock, allowing her to move on him smoother.
“Gonna keep you, baby. Not like I haven’t already,” Logan said as he leaned his head back up, watching y/n crumble on his lap.
“Gonna be my girl, baby? Officially? Some gotta work no more, only for me,” Logan said as a hand softly wrapped around her neck. “Mhm hm,” y/n accepted something she didn’t even think about.
“Yeah? Gonna be a good girl and stick by my side for the same pay?” He asked. “Yes,” y/n whined, but down, she didn’t care about the pay, and he could see that. He could read right through her.
“Money isn’t the prize for you though, now ain’t it, baby? You just wanna ride my cock until you go dumb,” Logan said, making her nod her head repeatedly.
“Oh, yeah,” the man groaned darkly as he planted his feet and began plunging up into the younger lady, making her take him far more than she could handle.
“Oh, fuck,” y/n cried as the grip on his shoulders tightened. “Good little girl — So damn pretty and obedient. Almost thought you hated me,” the man smirked up at her as she shook.
She did hate the man. That was until she realized how good-looking he was and how damn good his cock felt.
“So drunk on my cock, you’re forgetting I basically took you from your home,” the man fake pouted as he snapped his hips harder, allowing the room to fill with their skin clapping.
“I’m gonna cum, sir,” y/n warned, making him groan at how good she sounded calling him sir. “Good, baby. Cum on my cock. Soak my jeans. Show me who you belong to. Show me who I belong to,” Logan said, feeling his own orgasm near.
“Oh, yes — Yes, yes,” y/n cried out as she shook, letting loose all over the man with a loud moan. “That’s it! Fuckin’ cum on me, y/n. Cum!” The man’s grip on her neck and waist tightened, making y/n feel taken over. That feeling only made her mind foggy.
“Gonna fill you up, baby. You gonna like that? Gonna take it? — Tell me you’re gonna take it, baby,” Logan needed to hear her. “Gonna take it,” y/n could barely get out from how slow her mind was moving her the lack of air getting out of her throat. “Ah huh, ah huh!”
Logan brutally fucked the girl with a loud groan, spilling into her as she shook and went slack. He held her up though, making sure her half-opened eyes looked down at the man who now claimed he’d officially.
“Yes, baby,” the man couldn’t stop rutting into her. The pleasure only grew more as he heard her and his cum mixing together in her cunt. She was full, but he wanted to fill her more.
“Fuck, c’mere,” Logan said as he picked y/n up and threw her over his shoulder. He paid no attention to the state they were in and walked out of the VIP room.
“Cancel all appointments with y/n for tonight and any other night — Buy everything on the list I made all week so she’ll have something good to wake up to,” Logan said as he walked down the hallway and out of the back door that lead to other parts of the club.
Logan carried y/n to his room which was on the last floor of the large building. He knew she had questions to ask the whole way up, but all she could let out were whines.
Her cunt still leaked his cum, occasionally dropping down his arm as he stepped through his building. He fucked her well and planned to put her to sleep.
“Gonna wake up like a princess tomorrow morning, Bub,”
#logan howlett x you#logan howlett xmen#logan howlet x reader#logan howlett x reader#logan howlet smut#logan howlett smut#logan howlett x fem!reader#logan howlett#james howlett x you#james howlett x reader#james howlett smut#james howlett#wolverine x female reader#wolverin smut#wolverine x you#wolverine xmen#wolverine x men#wolverine#wolverine x reader#wolverine smut#dark!logan howlett#dom!logan howlett#dark!james howlett#dom!james howlett#dark!wolverine#dom!wolverine#hugh jackman x you#hugh jackman x reader#hugh jackman smut#hugh jackman
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PAC 18+: how to walk ‘em like a dog 🦮🎀🐆




“Back to the kitty, ‘cus she kinda pretty
Couldn’t stop lookin’ at her ti-ti-ti— face!
Me and cat mama rolled into the distant fog
Little did she know, I’m a nasty dog.”
Pile 1:
Shufflemancy -
Pussy Talk by City Girls ft. Doja Cat
Kehlani by Jordan Adetunji
The Zone by The Weeknd
Ten of Cups, Six of Cups, Five of Swords, Make An Altar, Chanting, Use Your Hands, Camera, Mirror, & The Grim Reaper
Hey pile,1 😝. The person who wishes for you to walk them like a dog admires you so much, they might even over romanticize you in their head, to them, you fulfill their fantasies. They think about you in different positions and wonder how your hands feel on them 😮💨. They get hard/wet just by the thought of you alone. I believe you show that to this person as well, you could tease them often or like to give them a show whenever you walk past them. “P*ssy talented it do cartwheels and he pay cus he like how that part feels, p*ssy give speeches, heart felt, say the p*ssy really talk like it Garfield (it do)” 😅 oh god, I think this person is obsessed with the sounds your bodies make during sex, they are heavily infatuated with you. “I like the way your body is, is that too obvious? Okay I like your confidence, oh that’s what good karma, like kehlani is, bad just like kehlani is.” This person desires to be fair in the bedroom, they want to cum with you, pile 1. This might be someone you’ve known since childhood, your first love, or an ex that you met when you were young. You could be playful and mischievous in the bedroom, but also like to take the lead. Switch vibes are prominent in this pile. You and your person like to give and take. You could be a brat and they want to be your brat tamer. If you follow each other, this person has been watching your stories on social media, I feel like you post risqué photos for them and wonder if it’s working 👀 trust me it has, cus they have been getting it off to your pictures in secret 🤫… This person definitely worships your body and your beauty.
Full reading on my patreon
Pile 2:
Shufflemancy -
Goodies by Ciara ft. Petey Pablo
Slumber Party by Ashnikko ft. Princess Nokia
Bimbo Doll by Tila Tsoli ft. BJ Lips
King of Wands, King of Cups, Knight of Cups, Watch A Movie, Massage, Rest, Talking, Keys on a Ring, & Love Call
I love how hyper feminine my pile 2 is 🎀! You guys are so popular and have so many options in your dating life. People think that you are so cute but in a tempting way. Do you dress y2k, mcbling, or coquette? Whatever your style might be, people think it looks so hot on you. You could attract both girls and guys with your looks, especially older guys. “You may look at me and think that I’m just a young girl but I’m not just a young girl. Baby this is what I’m lookin for - sexy, independent, gotta spend it type for gettin his dough. I’m not being too dramatic that’s just how I gotta have it. I bet you want the goodies, bet you thought about it.” You know your worth and don’t settle for less, despite your sweet appearance you know you give people a run for their money. People even wish to give you their money. Are you a sugar baby? If not, you should become one, you’d be very successful. I have a feeling you have people wrapped around your pretty finger. Others desire to spoil you with gifts and money. Dare I say I see this pile being with both a woman and a man (maybe even at the same time?)👀. “Me and your girlfriend playin’ dress up in my house, I gave your girlfriend c*nnilingus on my couch. She cute, kawaii, hentai boobies that excite me. I think she really likes me, ask politely, can I - woo ooh ooh (slumber party).” Two people wish to initate things with you but you have total control over the situation. Your features really entice people, you could have doe eyes, big lips, nice boobs, and a cute butt. When you talk, this person(s) doesn’t know where to focus their eyes, they get so nervous around you and have to control themselves from getting too intense with the conversation. They also really wish to hear you dirty talk to them. Your voice is a a major turn on to this peoples, it’s giving phone sex operator level of skill lol. As I was typing “hear”, I accidentally spelled “head” so they definitely want to see your lips on their d*ck/p*ssy as well😚.
Full reading on patreon
Pile 3:
Shufflemancy -
Get On Your Knees by Nicki Minaj ft. Ariana Grande
Distraction by Kehlani
Rocket by Beyoncé
Eight of Pentacles, Seven of Wands (reversed), Nine of Cups, Sex, Abundance Planning, Deep Breathing, The Sword and The Rose, Not Today, & Clock
PHEW 😮💨 don’t hurt em now, pile 3. This is my dominant pile. You guys know how to take charge in the bedroom. This person wants to be at your mercy. I’m talking having you on top and riding them as hard as you can or them getting on their knees to beg at your feet. This person actually wants to be walked like a dog lol. They are very submissive and like pain. I feel like you know this as well 😂! You have so much control over them and they want you to know you run this relationship. I feel you and this person are already together or have a thing going on, if not I see things progressing sexually pretty fast. This might be a tinder date situation. “Get on your knees, get on your knees, baby just get on your knees. Say pretty please, pretty please, pretty please. Baby just say pretty please” you could like to use this person as a stress reliever. The sex would be slow and intense. “Do me a favor, pick me up, take me out later. Don't worry about no paper cus I got much stacked up for nights like this” I see that you’re a hard working person and don’t have time to be in a committed relationship but value trust, loyalty, and honesty. This person provides that safe space for you and allows you to express your flaws in peace. You don’t have to be perfect and fake a smile like you usually have to do in professional settings. I see that this person really wishes to be with you in a romantic way but doesn’t want to rush or force things on you if they know you have other responsibilities to tend to. It’s reminding me of Nani and David from Lilo & Stitch. David had a huge crush on Nani but due to her focusing on needing to be there for Lilo and being a provider, she didn’t have time to acknowledge his feelings until later she was settled in her career. I see that you are grateful towards this person and attracted to their emotional intelligence.
Full reading on patreon
Pile 4:
Shufflemancy -
Blah Blah Blah by Kesha ft. 3OH!3
Please me by Cardi B ft. Bruno Mars
Dip It Low by Christina Milian
The Chariot, Seven of Swords, Ten of Wands, Pleasure, Flow Like Water, Hydrate, Addiction, Date, & The Phoenix
Heyyy, pile 4 😉. I see that this person got you down bad lol but not to worry since the feeling is mutual. I feel that you came on to this person before they even did. You could be an extrovert while this person is an introvert. They’re very reserved and are careful with how they express themselves. You might flirt with this person while they’re on the job or when they’re focusing in class. They like to pretend they are disinterested in your advances to see how much you’re willing to keep going after them. It could stroke their ego a little bit knowing someone as “cute” as you likes them (I heard an emphasis on the word “cute”). You could be feeling confused on whether or not they like you back and it results in you feeling pouty about the situation. This connection could be relatively new but this person is wanting to explore how things go! This person could want to tease you a lot or perhaps even degrade 🫠. They might like to talk shit playfully just to get under your skin. For some reason I feel like this person likes to make you mad 💀 they can be really annoying. They like when you tell them to shut up or put them in their place. If you yelled at them even and kissed this person the next, they would live for that shit. They’re kinda toxic honestly 😂. “blah, bl-bl-blah, blah, blah. Coming out'cha mouth with'cha blah, blah, blah. Zip your lip like a padlock (Yeah) and meet me in the back with the Jack at the jukebox (back, back). I don't really care where you live at, just turn around, boy, let me hit that. Don't be a little bitch with your chit chat just show me where your d*ck’s at”. This person really enjoys your banter and despite being so hard on you they really only have a soft spot for you, I heard “that’s my baby” 🥹☺️. Pile 4, you must have a great ass as well 🍑. This person looks at your physique when you’re not looking, they really want to know what it feels like to have your body pressed against them. “Please me, baby. Turn around and just tease me, baby. You know what I want and what I need, baby. (Let me hear you say) Please” this person’s energy is honestly all over the place 💀 they’re just so horny lol. This person wants you *london accent* BAD, man.
Full reading on patreon
Pile 5:
Shufflemancy -
Lolly by Maejor ft. Justin Bieber & Juicy J
Walk Like This by FLO
Promiscuous by Nelly Furtado ft. Timbaland
Seven of Pentacles, Page of Cups, The Star (reversed), Plan A Meal, Nourish Your Temple, Music, Love, Passion, & Photograph
Ooo wee, pile 5🫣🤭, when I say this person has a biiiiig 📦 for you. This person has very masculine energy, almost giving fuckboy/frat guy vibes 😂. They could be very fit and muscular with a nice smile, they know they’re fine and attract a lot of people towards them. There could be a height difference between you and this person. Their attraction to you is because of the stereotypical phrase “idk you’re just different”. They don’t have the exact reasons why they’re into you but they do like your creativity, mannerisms, and shy demeanor. This person could have a corruption kink 💀. They could want to see you break out of that good girl / good boy routine and try something new and risky. You and this person know of each other but don’t seem to be very close, perhaps they are in your friend circle or you guys are just acquaintances. They often have dirty thoughts of you giving them head and seeing how much you can take of them. This person could wine and dine you first before wanting to go down on you. “Order what you want, girl, it ain't no problem. I'ma tell the waitress that my baby need a bottle. Order what you want, said it ain't no problem. Got a piece of candy and it's all for you. She say she love my lolly. She wanna make it pop. She say she love my lolly. She wanna kiss the top”. They like sex that’s really rough and nasty, if it’s not messy and loud they’re not into it 😭. I see that they’re into positions like 69, cowgirl, and missionary. They’re big on seeing your face during sex, they get really cheeky about the good work they’re doing and would want to pin your hands down so you can beg for more. I do see jewelry and this person wearing chains🙂↔️. This person would be more so walking you like a dog but you have them on a leash in the sense you keep them coming back. They could have you walking funny after you’re done 🤭 you might be really sore the next day as well. “There's a reason I walk like this (I walk). My baby, he be lovin' on this (Oh yeah). When he do it, he be workin' that shit (Oh yeah) And every night he got me wantin' more of it”. You might feel confident and pleased after having sex with this person and can feel a sense of relief.
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Pile 6:
Shufflemancy -
Play With It by Tommy Genesis
Who Am I (What's My Name?) by Snoop Dogg
Girls Need Love by Summer Walker
The Fool (reversed), The Sun, Five of Cups (reversed), Write a Gratitude List, Take a Walk, Clean Your Space, Family, Not Enough, Ax, & Healing Heart
Pile 6, you still not over your ex, huh 😔? It’s ok, no judgment here, baby 🫶. I see you and your ex still have an attachment together, things might be on and off or you don’t really know where the direction of this relationship is headed towards. I see that you are a very caring person and because of miscommunication, you and this person seem to never be on the right foot. It’s possible some of you who picked this pile have a baby with this person or will get pregnant (please use protection if this isn’t what you want!). I see a lot of fertility going on in this pile, you and this person could prefer to make love or have sex as if you’re making a baby lol. This person could have a breeding kink? They get turned on by the idea of you being pregnant with their child. Whenever you wear sundresses that is also sexy to them. I feel like your body is so tea, pile 6. Either you’re really thick and curvy or your body is just gorgeous to people, especially your sp. This person fantasizes about doing it raw while you touch yourself in front of them. “Play wit' the p*ssy, wanna play wit' the p*ssy. Come get a hooky, baby, come get a hooky. I wanna fuck you, baby, I wanna fuck you. If we not fuckin', baby, come get it poppin'”. This person is scared to fully pursue because you seem to be in a place of healing in your life and doesn’t want to add to that. There is another person that is new coming who also wishes to take your ex’s spot 👀 Oop! I feel like this will be their friend who will make passes at you and this will make your sp really jealous lol. In the bedroom, their jealousy could make them more dominant and want to take control. There is a lot about wanting to hear you moan or scream their name. They can be very vocal too i'm getting a lot about hissing so maybe they hiss whenever you get their spot? PHEW- They could want to fuck you doggy style while they spank your ass. “She want the nigga with the biggest nuts, and guess what? He is I and I am him. Slim with the tilted brim, what's my motherfuckin' name? Snoop Doggy Dogg (The bomb). Snoop Doggy Dogg Snoop Doggy Dogg (The bomb)” they can be really boastful after sex if they get you to cum and you can get annoyed by this lol. You might tell your person “it wasn’t even allat🙄” and they’ll tease you cus they know it was 😋. I see this person providing you with aftercare and massaging your back and feet. Even though you might not be together at the moment, this person really values you as a person and knows their place.
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Pile 7:
Shufflemancy -
Hey Daddy (Daddy's Home) by Usher
JT Coming by JT
Huff n Puff by Red Velvet
Page of Swords, Knight of Wands (reversed), The Emperor, Be Still, Energy Work, Sync with the Moon, The Snake, Lightning, & Separation
Alright this is giving my queer pile 🥰, very androgynous energy all around here 😎. Regardless of what your gender might be, both you and this person are independent and like to have things a certain way. You could have met them through a dating app or while on a date with another person (Crazy work but ok 😂). I'm getting maybe someone is a bartender or works at some place where they have to socialize a lot. You and your sp are very flirtatious towards the other but someone gets super shy when it comes to compliments. This is for a select few of you but some of you might be transgender? Perhaps you are a trans man/woman and this person is cisgender. You might be nervous to be too flirty with them in case they might reject you but honestly i'm getting go for it baby, life is too short to be worrying about those things (just remember to be safe is all 🫶🏽). This person will be very polite and respectful towards you so just allow yourself to unwind when you go out with this person. "I ain't gotta do a lot of flexing (Uh-huh). Shorty, you already know what it is. Ha, and girl, tonight we gonna do a lot of sexin', yeah. Can't nobody do your body like this." They could be very forward and direct when it comes to communication they do not like beating around the bush, i'm getting someone likes to man spread a lot or you will notice that they sit with their legs open. Laaaawd when I tell you this person has a big 🍆 or owns one, they will have that shit ready for you LOLLL. This person gives big dick energy they're just very secure with themselves and how they carry on. You might feel insecure about some things and ask them "does this bother you?" or "do you find this attractive?" and they're gonna be like "yah" to everything. THEY MIGHT NOT EVEN GIVE A VERBAL RESPONSE TBH they just might nod their head or whatever and look at you like "is we fuckin' or what 😏🎶?". To them, these questions don't make sense like for example they would think "why wouldn't I like hip dips?" or "facial harmony? what the hell does that even mean? I don't care about that, I care about you." So if you are someone who compares themselves to people on the internet truuuust when I say this person is not chronically online to understand any of that shit. They like what they see and they just want to give it to you and more. "It's been a while since you gave, ho, it's time to give it up (Give it up). Like a bitch with a fresh BBL, you can't sit with us (Nah). Fine motherfucker, white boys say I rock (Hah). I gotta stay protected 'cause y'all stay on my c*ck. My new whip beautiful, I call it p*ssy whip. It was a gift, my nigga friends say he p*ssy whipped." Your sp might be older as well or very mature for their age.
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Pile 8:
Shufflemancy -
SHY GUY by Tinashe
Good For You by Selena Gomez ft. A$ap Rocky
Unfold by Alina Baraz
Seven of Swords, Five of Pentacles, The Star, Journal, Look for Fairies, Movement, Hammer, The Dragonfly, & Self-Indulgence
Aww this is my soft pile 🛌. I see that you guys are very spiritual and dreamy. You might fantasize a lot about this person. For some of you, you might even be manifesting them. I see that the feelings you have towards this person are very tender and loving. I see that this person is very flighty and doesn’t wish to have such a big commitment. This person you are interested could have ghosted you or there’s something wrong with your communication. Maybe you and this person have different time zones or a conflict of schedule. There’s something about the person not being there for you. “Shy guy, always sayin' it's the wrong time. Even though you know it feels right. Love don't fit into your timeline (La, la, la, la). Shy guy, always sayin' it's the wrong time. Even though you know it feels right. Love don't fit into your timeline. Shy guy (Guy, guy, guy, guy, guy)” I believe you are being too kind to this person and need to detach and allow them to chase you. Focusing on yourself and seeing other people will allow this person to show up for you and be the person that you need. Now is the time for you to be self indulgent and take care of yourself. Some of you should practice healing in the bedroom and should learn about what makes you feel good sexually. Perhaps exploring with new partners will help you find new things that provide pleasure. I see that you are very submissive or lean towards more vanilla. Try to vocalize what makes you feel good to your partner and be more assertive. Your energy reminds me of Jhené Aiko’s song “P*$$y Fairy”, very sensual but delicate. To this person if you were to show them your new found confidence, they will crumble to their knees and will feel stunned. They might ask you questions like “where did you learn this baby???” Or “have you been having fun without me?”. They really love how you taste 😳 this sp wants to pull your dress/skirt up or pants off and just go to town. Their favorite thing is when you’re all dolled up and getting ready to go out. “Gonna wear that dress you like, skin-tight. Do my hair up real, real nice. And syncopate my skin to your heart beating. Cause I just wanna look good for you, good for you. I just wanna look good for you, good for you. Let me show you how proud I am to be yours.” I’m seeing that they admire your facial expressions during sex for to them it’s too cute, something about makeup smudging? Things can get really messy 👀
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Pile 9:
Shufflemancy -
Come Alive by Jackson Wang
Earned It by The Weeknd
Swim by Chase Atlantic
Eight of Wands, Death, The Hanged One, Dance, Look to the Stars, Sound Healing, The Grim Reaper, Ascending, & Healthy Choices
When I tell you this pile is NASTYYY. It’s honestly crazy how much this person wants to match your freak, pile 9. Definitely saved best for last. The sex almost feels cinematic in a way. Something about this person just gives main character vibes that is so seductive you can’t turn your eyes away from them. I believe your relationship with this person could have progressed pretty fast. For some of you, you could have kissed or even had sex after the first date. While I also see that this is a friends with benefits situation (does someone have a contract?!). You could find them mysterious or wish to get to know them on a more interpersonal level. You could feel that these things are more surface level in terms of attraction and don’t want the intimacy to only be superficial. I see that this sp is charming and prefers to disclose things little by little. “I come alive. You start me up a million times. And I'm terrified. That you could leave me crying.” So this person could be afraid of opening up to you because they are nervous about getting their heart broken. They might have previously gotten out of a relationship and they are learning how to trust in a partner again. Your sp could be afraid of rejection and that's why they are disorganized in terms of how they want to pursue you. Providing this person with assurance will help them gain courage, also pile 9, make sure to do what's healthy for you, try not to overly devote your time to this person. I see that communicating with your partner and talking about how you have been feeling will want to open up more and trust you. Something about wearing lingerie in the bedroom is a major turn on for this person. Taking control and guiding this person will help allow them to let their guard down. "Cause girl, you're perfect (girl, you're perfect). You're always worth it (always worth it). And you deserve it (and you deserve it). The way you work it (the way you work it). 'Cause girl, you earned it, yeah (earned it). Girl, you earned it, yeah". Your sp would be over the moon for you.
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#pac#pick a card#pick a pile#18+ pac#astro observations#astrology#astrology observations#leopard#mcbling#y2k#y2k aesthetic#18+ pick a pile#tarot#tarot reading#tarot cards#oracle cards#witchcraft#witch#manifestation#manifest#law of assumption#mindset#Spotify
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