#about damn time we have an ancient chinese mythology game

[twistedappletree]

i want more days off so i can finally play black myth: wukong 😭

[nataliesewell]

monster prom pop quiz results

I was bored, so I decided to try and record all the questions and answers in Monster Prom’s Stupidest Pop Quiz Ever(tm). It’s really likely I haven’t found them all, so I’ll come back and add to this from time to time.

The pop quiz consists of three questions; the first two go towards determining your highest stats at the beginning of the game, while the third chooses your possible prom date (this isn’t set in stone; you can still try to pursue a different character in the actual game). The order of the questions is randomized.

Other links: Vera Walkthrough

You can find the questions and their results under the cut!

stat questions

What is your spirit emoji?

a. Caucasian guy with a turban because fuck stereotypes. +CREATIVITY

b. Octopus emoji. Best animal on Earth. I know 5 mixed drinks, 3 drug cocktails, and 17 sex positions that involve one or several octupi. +FUN

c. Snowman, because that motherfucker is in the middle of a blizzard and he’s fuckin’ smiling. He doesn’t give a fuck about blizzards. And he has a kickass hat. +BOLD

It’s your chance to fix global warming. Go ahead!

a. Global warming isn’t real. I invented it, and now science is claiming authorship because science is a lame copycat with no original ideas. +CREATIVITY

b. Nah, the world is doomed. But I’ll start investing in ships and start a profitable business for the “soon to be covered by water” world. +WEALTH

c. It’s time to be a real hero: I’ll lead a mission to the sun in order to... invite the sun to the party of its life! We’ll have so many hilarious misadventures that the sun will eventually become... cooler. ;) +FUN

Be a visionary: what will the next big social media craze be?

a. Bull$hit: it’s Facebook, but each time someone shares news that isn’t supported by real facts, they’re taxed, and the money goes to the people exposed to that bullshit. +WEALTH

b. Greek Agoras: like literal Greek agoras re-instated in our cities. Places where philosophy and arts are discussed by the greater minds. That’s the social media I want to log into! +SMARTS

c. Rbert: from now on, a socially awkward guy named Robert will do everything he’s commanded to do through the app by its users! +CHARM

You wish you were raised by...

a. A mysterious old man who saved me from the streets in order to raise me as his disciple in the ancient ways of rad DJing! +FUN

b. A pack of wild wolves... who also happens to be tech moguls who own some of the most profitable companies of Silicon Valley. They would be kick-ass role models AND wild wolves! Sick! +WEALTH

c. A really progressive marriage between a kick-ass venomous snake and... actual fire. I love fire and I see no issue with being raised by it. +BOLD

You build a 100ft statue commemorating an event so that in 1000 years archaeologists can learn something about the people of our time. What does the statue represent?

a. That glorious instant when your friend stopped you from texting embarrassing stuff to your ex while hella drunk. +FUN

b. That mind-blowing twist in your favourite TV show that clearly changed the life of everyone forever, unlike all that boring stuff they show on the news. +CREATIVITY

c. Your least favourite political figure... being devoured by rabid rhinoceri... which are also covered in badass tattoos. +BOLD

Which is the coolest mythological creature?

a. The invisible hand of the free market. +WEALTH

b. A sphinx... who’s super turnt up and ready to party! And she raps all her riddles (she still kills you if you don’t answer them correctly... but she raps the riddles)! +FUN

c. This weird creature I drew when I was six and which is clearly super derivative from other mythological creatures... but it’s super cool and it’s my OC and my spirit animal, okay? +CREATIVITY

You’re elected president for a day. What’s the first law you pass?

a. You can deduct taxes by writing sonnets instead. Amount of taxes deducted are calculated based on the beauty of the sonnets. +CREATIVITY

b. Trivia fact: presidents don’t pass laws... so is this a trick question or are you just being an idiot? +SMARTS

c. One dollar bills will now include a picture of me and the inscription “Beware: Too Much Awesomeness.” My presidency might last a day, but my fame will last forever! +CHARM

A radioactive possum just bit you... what superpowers did you get?

a. The superpower of always choosing the right combination of emojis to get the desired reaction from all people: seducing my loved ones, burning my enemies, settling an argument, and even conveying complex emotional thoughts. +CHARM

b. Uh, probably rabies? I’d go to a hospital immediately. +SMARTS

c. The incredible power of writing fanfiction so compelling that the actual creators of the TV shows decide to go with my ideas and crazy ships. +CREATIVITY

School is outdated and lame. We need a new school subject asap!

a. Critical thought. I mean... damn, this country could really use a subject like that in schools. +SMARTS

b. Turning people into your puppets through emotional warfare and deception 101. +CHARM

c. How to correctly punch a crocodile without terrible consequences. +BOLD

If you had to have sex with animal... which animal would it be?

(You don’t get six answers; the three answers you get are randomized.)

a. A great white shark. I have to fuck an animal, let’s at least make it a story worth telling! +CHARM

b. A swan. They’re classy. Plus it reminds me of that myth of Leda and the Swan, so at least by bestiality standards it has a certain chic appeal. +CREATIVITY

c. A human being, because I’m the kind of douchebag who loves to find loopholes in stupid questions like this one. +SMARTS

d. A purebred horse. At least I can keep his semen and sell it. It’s worth a lot! Who said there was no silver lining to bestiality? +WEALTH

e. A dolphin. They’re the only other animal that fucks just for pleasure, so at least we can both do our best to have a good time, right? +FUN

f. No on can make me fuck an animal. If I fucked an animal, it’d be of my own free will. As a matter of fact, I already have fucked an animal, so the joke’s on you, pal. +BOLD

The coolest reality show would be...

a. Twelve experts on the various arts of seduction live in a house where they must face a common challenge: seducing a potato into marriage... somehow. +CHARM

b. Eight rich people fight in weekly challenges to see who’s the best at giving money to you. +WEALTH

c. People in various positions of power must face all sorts of questions relevant to their field, and if they fail, they lose their jobs... and society wins. +SMARTS

You get the chance to produce a movie. It’s based on...

a. The most influential Russian novelists of the XIX century... have gone nuts! They don’t remember anything about last night and now they can’t find the manuscript of The Brothers Karamazov; and Dostoyevsky has to deliver it TODAY! +FUN

b. Two cool guys walking away from rad explosions. And they don’t look at the explosions. THEY DON’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THE EXPLOSIONS! They reflect on life and love... AND IT IS SUPER DOPE AND KICK-ASS BECAUSE THEY DO SO WALKING AWAY FROM NEVER-ENDING EXPLOSIONS! +BOLD

c. Something about superheroes, but with a love triangle between a beauty yet somehow relatable girl (maybe she’s always stating she’s a mess?) and two of the super hot superheroes, which are also like vampires or pirates or both. Instant hit! +WEALTH

Democracy is just broken. What would be the best way of choosing the leaders of modern society?

a. Whoever can play the most heartbreaking violin solo wins. +CREATIVITY

b. You put all the candidates in an empty room... with a wild grizzly bear. Whoever kills the bear should be our president. If everyone dies, then it’s obvious: the bear should be our president. +BOLD

c. We create a reality show called “America’s Next Top President” where the candidates compete in all kinds of physical and mental challenges. Voter turnout would increase and we would turn a profit on it! +FUN

If you could put a curse on your worst enemy, what would it do?

a. I’d curse them to fall in love with a wonderful person and be happily married before they realize that all this time... their partner was a wild panther in disguise! Then the panther viciously devours my enemy. Classic! +BOLD

b. The curse of always meeting obnoxious people at parties who are super into new fad diets that feel the need to explain them in detail. +CHARM

c. You can’t rely on the effectiveness of a curse. I prefer to take care of my enemies the old-fashioned way: by exposing them to unsafe doses of radiation over the course of several years. +SMARTS

What would be the coolest prize you could find in your box of cereal?

a. A tiny piece of sharp metal, so every scoop will be full of thrill and danger! +BOLD

b. The phone number of the sexy tiger on the front of the box. He’s so passionate about breakfast and health that he’s surely also a grrreat lover. +CHARM

c. A sample of a more nutritious breakfast option, so people are encouraged to stop eating that colorful crap. +SMARTS

What inanimate object do you think would make the best girlfriend or boyfriend, provided you went criminally insane?

a. A human-size pillow depicting a character created by myself. As a matter of fact, I have all the needed paperwork and I’m only waiting for the conservative narrow-minded laws of our country to finally step forward into waifu and husbando territory, as was clearly intended by God. +CREATIVITY

b. A dildo, duh. +FUN

c. An ATM. Sugar baby life, here I come! +WEALTH

Which god do you pray to each night before sleeping?

a. Praying is kind of lame. I have a group text set up with some deities: Dionysus, Bastet, Loki... coolest cats in town. +CHARM

b. Praying is for fools. I took some compromising pics of a god molesting a tree, and now I blackmail him for whatever I want. A lot more effective. +SMARTS

c. Oh, I pray to all kinds of gods. I have this business where people pay me to deliver their prayers every night. I’ve even started to look for a Chinese factory to outsource the prayers. +WEALTH

prom date questions

What is the sexiest type of knowledge a lover can have?

a. How to set stuff on fire. ❤️DAMIEN

b. All the principles to build a financial empire. ❤️VERA

c. Lyrics to all Disney songs. ❤️MIRANDA

d. Obscure 80s movie trivia. ❤️LIAM

e. Sports things. ❤️SCOTT

f. How to make a killer cocktail out of anything. ❤️POLLY

Your partner just gave you a cool gift for your anniversary but you totally forgot! Quick, come up with an idea for a great gift!

a. The head of their fiercest enemy. ❤️VERA

b. A silly toy that makes silly noises. ❤️SCOTT

c. The abstract concept of gratefulness. ❤️LIAM

d. A pony. Always a pony. ❤️MIRANDA

e. Anything on fire. Or a weapon. No, no: a weapon on fire. ❤️DAMIEN

f. Anything capable of leading them to an overdose of some sorts. ❤️POLLY

What would be a deal-breaker for a potential lover?

a. The person lacks taste. ❤️LIAM

b. The person is mediocre. ❤️VERA

c. The person is a coward. ❤️DAMIEN

d. The person is boring. ❤️POLLY

e. The person hates the outdoors. ❤️SCOTT 

f. The person lacks manners. ❤️MIRANDA

What would be a killer accessory?

a. Sunglasses... at night. ❤️POLLY

b. A fabulous purse made from the skin of your worst enemy. ❤️VERA

c. Coolness itself. ❤️LIAM

d. Fancy brass knuckles. ❤️DAMIEN

e. A necklace with your own name... in case you forget! ❤️SCOTT

f. Shiny armor. ❤️MIRANDA

The world will end tomorrow... What will you do today?

a. Nobody ends the world but me! I’ll end the world today. ❤️DAMIEN

b. It’s okay! We invented the apocalypse to take care of the overpopulation of commoners. ❤️MIRANDA

c. I’ll finish my novel... whoever comes after the end should know my legacy! ❤️LIAM

d. 100 push-ups... no, no 200 push-ups! ❤️SCOTT

e. They always tell you the world is ending... I’ll profit on other people’s hysteria. ❤️VERA

f. I always party as if there were no tomorrow... so who cares? ❤️POLLY

Which criteria would you use to name your children?

a. Meh... no name? It’s just too much work! ❤️POLLY

b. I will research for a name that is pun-proof and joke-proof. No one will pick on them. ❤️VERA

c. A non-heteronormative name to give them freedom to define themselves on their own terms. ❤️LIAM

d. Just a swear word. ❤️DAMIEN

e. My name + “II” (the Second). ❤️MIRANDA

f. Something simple and friendly, like Bobby or Mary. ❤️SCOTT

If you were an ice cream... which flavour would you be?

a. Double creme de la Gruyere and meringues. ❤️LIAM

b. Spicy chocolate. No... chocolate on FIRE! ❤️DAMIEN

c. Success. ❤️VERA

d. Tequila and coke. ;) ❤️POLLY

e. Rainbows and gummy bears. ❤️MIRANDA

f. Meat! ❤️SCOTT

What would be your dream first date?

a. An art exhibition experimental enough to give you a seizure. ❤️LIAM

b. A sweaty and manly wrestling match. ❤️SCOTT

c. A professional meeting where you charm your date with some astonishing business advice! ❤️VERA

d. A wild party in international waters. ❤️POLLY

e. A lovely walk in the forest... after rescuing your date from a dragon! ❤️MIRANDA

f. Crimes. ❤️DAMIEN

You find a genie in a bottle. You can ask for whatever you want. What do you ask for?

a. A rainbow that you can eat! ❤️MIRANDA

b. I don’t ask for anything. I drink the genie from the bottle. I can grant my own wishes! ❤️DAMIEN

c. Before asking for anything, you try to negotiate up to the three standard wishes. ❤️VERA

d. Infinite confetti! ❤️POLLY

e. ...His friendship! ❤️SCOTT

f. Him to not be so cliched. Genies and wishes... so mainstream! ❤️LIAM

What would be the most appealing in a love partner?

a. A big... horn. ❤️DAMIEN

b. Sharp wits. ❤️LIAM

c. Kawaii eyes. ❤️MIRANDA

d. A very tsundere personality. ❤️VERA

e. Soft fur. ❤️SCOTT

f. A taste for party. ❤️POLLY

[tumblunni]

MORE PERSONASONA THOUGHTS

Actually maybe it could be cool to imagine a design for a phantom thief whose mask is like a full face-covering thing? Like a faceless mask. or a mask with a buncha eye symbols on it. OR maybe the persona has that aesthetic, I dunno??? One of the beta protag designs in the artbook has a mask like that, but with a smiley face covering it. That + an all-concealing cloak = a pretty damn cool aesthetic! Even if it didnt fit the protagonist its a shame that they didnt give it to another character, so I might try and make something with a similar appeal.

MORE POTENTIAL THINGS THAT SHOULD BE PERSONAS

Bunnies of myth! There’s the Jackalope (a bunny with horns), the Wolpertinger (a bunny with horns AND wings) and Al-mi’raq (a bunny with only one horn, also said to be one of a kind and incredibly powerful despite being regular bunny sized) And there’s apparantly quite a few other tales of powerful horned rabbits from all different countries and time periods! O_O I was totally under the impression that the Jackalope was just made up in semi-modern cryptid legends, and didnt really count as a proper mythological creature. Rasselbock is the german name, and that sounds really awesome! Also there’s apparantly a hella mysterious recurring symbol of three hares attatched at the ears in an eternal circle, which has appeared in multiple cultures across the world and nobody knows its meaning.

Okay I LEGITIMATELY DID NOT KNOW that Puck from A Midsummer Night’s Dream is given neutral pronouns in the original form of the play! O_O I mean, the pop culture version is always male, and in school when we read it the character was taught to us as male! I feel totally destroyed that I missed a chance to learn about LGBT characters in history during my school years... Holy shit I REALLY wanna pick Puck now! I always love trickster figures!!

okay i really do not know much at all about folk heroes/classical literature heroes but I do know one from my country at least! Taliesin (tally-essin) was a kind of robin hood esque figure who gets all the same ‘did he actually exist? is he a myth? did a real man exist but was exaggerated in myth?’ stuff. He was a super magical poet bard dude who was magically blessed with the most witty tongue in all of existance because he stole a potion of super knowledge from a witch as a child. It also made him super beautiful cos the witch’s son was super ugly, I always felt REALLy sorry for the poor witch’s son cos seriously she made this potion for him and some random kid stole it and then he’s never mentioned again except to say that ‘he was so ugly that everyone who saw him died, so he made a career as a warrior’. Poor guy. Man, I actually like Morfran a lot better, can I make him a persona? He’s not really a hero or anything, he only gets like two sentences in someone else’s story but I just wanna give him a hug. It also always bugged me that the description of his ‘ugliness’ mentioned how his skin was ‘so black he was like a human crow’ like seriously screw u ancient mythological racisms... ANYWAY thats the only celtic mythology character that’s interesting that hasnt already appeared as a persona, lol. Tho since most of the personas that’ve appeared have been the scottish and irish versions, Finn MacCool was the equivelant to Taliesin. (Same origin story and everything!) The disadvantage is that his name sounds like a shitpost. Also incidentally its really fuckin sad that the only canonical depictions of LGBT characters in welsh myth are all like.. Problematic As Fuck Negative Depictions. I used to like the character Math Ap Mathonwy but then I read the story where he punishes the villains by turning them into a pig and a sow and making them rape each other and get pregnant... as punishment... its so fucked up.. And they’re like the only gay characters ever, and they’re also incestuous brothers, and just... so fucked up... The bad side of getting a mythology Special Interest as a kid: pretty much every mythology has at least one horrible sex story in it!

I’m really interested in learning more about Tu’er Shen! He’s apparantly a chinese deity of gay blessings, the spirit of a mortal man who was executed for loving other men and reincarnated as the form of a magical rabbit spirit. I hope he ended up finding true love in the spirit world... :( Seriously, even friggin mythological figures are dying from hate crimes. I don’t think people were very optimistic when they created this story, its horrible to know that society still hasnt progressed far enough that this bullshit has stopped happening! Cmon, seriously!! Please say the future is gonna be safe, someday! I can just imagine Tu’er Shen looking down on us and still crying.

Huh! Persona 5′s homophobia also manifesting in a weird unintentional way! They mention how one of the ways everyone attempted to get the sun god Ameratsu to open up her door was ‘someone doing a lewd dance’, and there’s a joke about Ryuji being that person. But I had NO IDEA that originally the person who did that was Ame No Uzume, another female deity! And it seems pretty damn ‘LGBT themes in mythology’, i mean the dialogue is Ame No Uzume saying ‘come and admire how perfect I am’ *points at crotch* I mean they probably couldnt mention all the explicit details in this random cameo mention in a persona game, but seriously would it have been so hard to just say it was ameratsu and ame no uzume? I suppose maybe since its a japanese game there was the assumption everyone would know the myth tho, so its more of a failure of the dubbing.

And then there’s a lot of themes of androgeny and gender-changing in Hindu and various african mythologies, but I feel like I’d have to do a lot more research into those cultures to depict them accurately. Its a damn shame that barely any european cultures had that level of respect for LGBT people so long ago, yet we like to act like we’re the height of progress and assume every other culture followed along the same historical template as us... I’m really interested in learning more about Dahomey mythology, wikipedia says that they have a genderless creator deity who split into two male and female twins, which then combined again into a different bigender deity. (Nana Buluku, Mawu, Lisa and Mawu-Lisa) And apparantly in zimbabwe there’s a shona deity called Mwari who is also genderless. I really don’t know anything about these cultures though, and there’s no way I’m gonna be drawing dumb anime versions of people’s important mythological figures based on just a wikipedia crawl! But at least this has inspired me to wanna go learn more. Also it just makes me feel a lot happier about myself to know that its not like there’s zero genderless people in all of mythology, just because my country has always been hella bigoted ^_^ But man, wikipedia’s list of LGBT figures in mythology is really REALLY focused on only depictions of sex, and it counts all the super negative stereotypes and shit of villainous rapist gay folks and people being ‘punished’ by being turned into another gender. And then any sort of positive interpretation is all THIS IS TOTALLY JUST AN INTERPRETATION HERE IS ALL THE EVIDENCE FOR IT BEING WRONG, YOU CANT IMPOSE MODERN IDEALS ON MYTHOLOGY NOBODY WAS EVER GAY BEFORE THE WORD EXISTED IN ENGLISH SO yeah its really demotivating to me to continue reading this and just Yikes with a capital Yikes. I’m gonna try and find if there’s more sources online about LGBT mythology education written by actual LGBT scholars...

[lethe-distillery-blog]

Trials of the Gods

One foot in front of the other. It was all I could manage at this point since I couldn't even breathe properly. I guess I knew how asthmatics felt now, to suck at one thing, one thing at all, it must be annoying as hell to suck at breathing; and boy didn't I know it, every inhale sent a sharp stabbing pain through my chest. It took everything to not groan, hell, even whimper at this point, but I didn't. I couldn't.

"Are you okay?"

I gave Gabrielle a smile that I hoped was more than merely a grimace of the pain that shuddered through me at the effort. But I couldn't show her I felt nearly as bad as I felt, call it male machismo but I already knew she felt guilty enough for what happened, my injuries were just a constant reminder that carelessness was dangerous. "I'm good." It wasn't entirely a lie, I was good, good enough to keep walking and getting out of here.

She frowned, her delicate lips twisting and remorse flashing in those delicate jade eyes and my stomach knotted. "You seem really short of breath." She murmured, as if not quite sure if she was imagining things or not. I decided to go with it, to try and lighten up the situation rather than have her thoughts coagulate into storm clouds and drag her down for something that hadn't entirely been her fault.

"Hey," she looked up at me sharply, her eyes a little wide, a little frightened. Fuck. I reached out and lightly stroked her cheek, a little clumsily given that it was my left hand, but still, she accepted my comfort and I smiled down at her. "You'd be a bit out of breath too if you fell down a mountain. I think I know how Hephestus felt, but I doubt he was this ugly after he fell down Olympus."

I felt vindicated as the corners of her mouth twitched slightly, we were both massive mythology geeks, she had actually studied and was now a professor at the local college and could wipe the floor with anything to do with mythology or ancient religions. I wasn't too sour though, I couldn't deal with co-ed brats, been there once, didn't need to live with it on a daily basis. I wasn't quite that masochistic. "You're not funny." Though her voice sounded a lot better, not quite so dismal and defeated.

"Sure I am," I smiled through a stab of pain as I fought back my own laughter, that would only hurt more, "you're just not educated enough to see it."

She rolled her eyes. "Whatever." Though she was smiling a bit now, it was hesitant, a bit drawn, it was still a smile and I counted it as a win. Besides, I knew that my sarcastic comment would rib her a little bit, I had gone to school to become an architect, my six-month course on specializing in refurbishing old homes had made me beat her own schooling career.

She looked up at me, her heart in her eyes. "Thank you."

I let her hold me gently, my left hand trailed down her back in slow comforting motions. Part of me knew that she needed this more than me, that she needed tangential proof that I was alive and in one piece. Though to be honest with myself. I needed it too, I felt one step from death and feeling the warm softness of her pressed against me helped ease some of that fear and pain inside me, even if it did hurt like a bitch. "It's really alright Gabby." I kissed her temple and moved to run my fingers through her hair. "Promise."

She looked up at me, tears making the jade in her eyes glisten like exquisite Chinese art, intricately shaped and beautiful beyond any mortal description, the memory of those unique features had haunted many a dream of mine when we were apart. She shook her head, her brown curls splashing around her neck, she hated the curls but I enjoyed them, they had always fascinated me with the way they seemed to bounce off her shoulders and back. And here, now, I was able to finally see if they were as soft as I had always thought they were. Hell, if all it would have taken was falling off a cliff, I would have done it years ago and put myself out of this hell. "I still can't believe you did that."

I shrugged slightly instantly regretting the movement and that absolute agony that followed that stupidity. "It wasn't anything special," I was a bit uncomfortable under her praise and her obvious gratefulness. I kissed her temple again, using the excuse of comfort to shield the fact that I had been wanting this for-fucking-ever, and she smelled amazing. She smelled of the cool air, of the pine trees that we had walked through to get here, of the wilderness around us, but beneath that, I could smell apples and cinnamon, and woman. I savored that, imprinting it in the deepest recesses of my mind so then I would never forget it during the long months of separation that was due to happen sooner or later. My job was a nightmare that way.

"It was special," she looked at me and frowned, "not just anyone would shove me out of the way and have that happen to them. That, was a loaded word. That, involved a long story that included her wanting to take a picture at the top of the mountain, well, it was a very tall hill really, granted it was rocky but it had trees all the way up and a river from an underground source that then stretched out in a river towards the west. Anyways, she had wanted a picture and we had stood on top as per her dictates. She had gotten the picture. But I had felt the ground starting to give way and shoved her forward just as it all collapsed on itself and I had slammed down through a hollow and fell, with a solid thud I might add, about fifteen or twenty feet down. The impact had knocked the wind out of me, and it might have broken a rib or two, definitely cracked, I couldn't tell much else aside from the screaming pain from a broken arm.

Getting out had been fun. Not really she had had to support my much heavier weight on a rope and I had managed to half climb, and half get dragged out of there. Christ was I thankful that I had finally convinced her to start bringing paracord with her, even on nothing more than a 'simple hike.' If she hadn't, I didn't know where I'd be. Likely back in that hole and not limping my way back home with her with an improvised sling. Granted. I was at my limit, I really couldn't go on much further, everything hurt but damned if I was telling her that. Still though, this one day hike had now taken nearly two, and we still had half the distance to go to get to my truck. Food was running out, I was grateful as shit that I had forgotten some protein bars in my pack from the last hike I had been on. They provided some much needed calories.

If I wasn't so damned useless I might have been able to make a snare or something but as it stood, if I tried I would only hurt myself more and even though Gabby was a whiz, and had splinted my arm pretty damn good with duct tape, paracord, and two sticks it wasn't a cast and I could always damage it more. Still, food wasn't the biggest concern, neither was water, if we made it another mile before sundown I knew where there was a waterfall that joined with others on the mountain that then formed the Cascan River. I didn't know how the water tasted, I hadn't ever considered it before, but at this point it didn't really matter. Water was water, and I had some purifying powder in my backpack. Thank god I was traveling light, if I had been carrying my usual thirty pounds of gear I would be seriously fucked. Even so, I had dropped down to bare essentials. A pot, sleeping bag, water purifying powder with a small medkit, waterproof matches, and a flare gun with three flares. I'd come back for the extra things we had dropped off at the top, and if someone took them, all well, I was at least still alive and the most expensive thing they'd be getting away with was the wind-up radio.

"Come on Gabby," I urged, though my muscles were protesting the thought of more hiking. "One more mile, you can hear it from here." She nodded and regretfully left my arms, I hated that, and felt instantly cold, but if I gave in to my urge to hold onto her forever we would never get off this mountain. I started moving again, leaning heavily on the stick I had found and started using as a walking stick, it helped a lot, taking at least some of the weight off my aching body. Christ did I feel like a wimp.

"Let me help you." Before I could protest Gabby came up on my other side, wrapped her arm around my waist and helped take some more weight off me. I was grateful, even if I didn't say anything but the smile I gave her. Everything hurt. Every step felt like I was dragging my feet through quicksand, my feet weighed down by bricks of iron that were my boots. Still, we trudged on. My breath coming out in rattling gasps soon enough but still, we moved on. I forced my mind to play a game. Every time we came up and over a small ridge, I would tell myself that I only had one more left. The sound of rushing water was getting louder too, so that helped, I at least knew we were getting closer.

Finally, after I felt like I couldn't take another step we came on the waterfall. They're not as quiet as everyone likes to think they are. They're loud. Water sloshing over the edge and cascading down and colliding with rock or other water. This one was one of the quieter ones I had ever found, and even so it sounded like the chatter of a moderately busy restaurant. Loud, but not enough where one needed to shout to be heard. I plopped down heavily on the grassy edge, too tired to admire the beautiful scene around us at the moment. It took everything in me to keep breathing though I didn't begrudge Gabrielle as she looked around in awe. I did smile to myself as she looked around my little haven. I had no doubt others knew of it, but it wasn't on most of the maps that were sold and so I had come to think of it as my personal refuge. I had come here a lot, especially during college, when I needed to stop and think.

The water came from the mountain itself, sloshing through rock and tree roots as it cascaded down the steep drop to slam into rock on the way down. There was a standing of trees that sheltered this place from general view and from the winds that could come down a mountain at night. It was a nice, secluded, and serene place. A part of me was jealous that someone else was here in my sacred place, but the other part, the larger part, was happy that if it had to be anyone, it was Gabrielle.

"This," her voice was breathy and it made a certain part of my anatomy stand up at attention, "is so beautiful, like a dream." She looked to me, "how did you know that this place was here? It's not on my map." I watched her, the flush in her cheek making my cock twitch, good to know I wasn't as broken as I felt though to be honest I could do without the agony of having an erection pressing up against my jeans as well as everything else but hey, fuck it, I was in pain, why not add some more.

"I found it," I wheezed slightly, my breathing slowly becoming more steady, "about four years ago. Second year of college. I thought that I had read my map wrong but," I indicated our surroundings, "apparently not." I smiled at her, taking a few seconds to breathe, "do you like it?"

She nodded, her eyes alight with wonder. I almost could picture her here, setting up a small chair, her easel and paints and spending an afternoon out here. Maybe, after all this was done, I could surprise her with that and a picnic lunch out here. Yeah, that could be nice. I sat back, resting my hands behind me to stretch my chest in an effort to breathe properly.

"Are you alright?"

There was a note of concern in Gabby's voice again and I smiled reassuringly at her. "Yeah I'm good, why don't we set out the sleeping bags first? Then maybe we can eat some dinner and watch the falls for a bit. She nodded, smiling, but it didn't quite reach her eyes, the darkness and haunted look was coming back. Fuck.

Dinner was a simple affair of beef jerky and sharing our final apple between us. I did my best to take her mind off our plight by telling her stories of back when I was in college as I fed her apple slices. I told her back to my one teacher Mr. Hastings, and how I would sit in the back of the class and grade his jokes like the judges at a dive competition by scrawling a number on a piece of paper with a permanent marker and holding it above my head. I told her about college pranks, wild stories about speeding down the highway on a motorcycle so fast you could almost pretend you were flying, and finally, I don't even know why, I told her of Sara, the first time in my life I ever opened up about that horrific nightmare. She held me gently as I let it all out, the pain and the humiliation of being so utterly broken by someone that you no longer believed in yourself, no longer believed that you could be anything more than a shell of what you once were. I told her about the degrading, the name calling, the treatment of my body that ended up being so bad that for nearly two years after we had broken up I hadn't been able to even masturbate because I had heard her voice degrading me every time I had tried.

"I'm so proud of you." She looked up at me, the conviction in her eyes stopping the caustic remark, the self-defense, the self degradation that I knew was just to keep myself from getting hurt more. If I thought of myself as shit, it wouldn't hurt that Gabrielle thought so too. "You didn't let her win, let her keep you shackled to what she had tied you in."

"I'm not perfect Gabby, I have days thinking that I am so fucked up that no one could ever love me, how could they?" I felt all sorts of pathetic, but the pain was wearing down my defenses, and being here, in my haven, with Gabby. I was a fucking goner, I was as raw and exposed as a newborn; still Gabby held onto me like I mattered. I looked down at her, my breath coming out in harsh pants, "I am so fucking useless."

Her lips closed over mine. Shocking me so much I nearly tried to keep talking into her mouth before she pressed her tongue against mine. I melted into the kiss, this, affection that was offered to me freely, given without hesitation or my need to ask for it. She gave to me, freely, without hesitation, without consequence or the need to get something first before she gave me something in return. I was shaking a little by the time she pulled back, I was grateful that her breathing was hard too, her eyes nearly starting to glow in the moonlight. "You're not useless, ever." She stroked the softest of touches against my cheek and I hated myself for moving into it, I was grateful she didn't ask why I hadn't told anyone. The stigma around male domestic violence still was a massive issue, and I was a problem of it, but she understood that I hadn't talked to anyone about it, ever, and instead, forced myself, personally, to move on. She rose up, shedding her jacket behind her, "and for what it's worth Christopher, you are loved." She pulled her shirt up and over her head exposing luminescent skin so pale a sheen it glowed like porcelain. "By me."

I was too startled to say anything, let alone move. Only my eyes had the functionality and they greedily took in every inch of the woman of my dreams in front of me, the one that had been a part of my life for so long and yet always just barely out of reach. Always nearby, but always out of my clawing, desperate attention. And here, now, I realized that I had to be patient, I had had to wait for her to come to me.

She stood slowly, shimmying out of her jeans revealing a sports bra and full cotton panties. She wasn't dressed like a vixen, a seductress, she was dressed for comfort, and it was that comfort, that warmth inside her that I let swallow me whole. "You look so beautiful." It came out before I could stop it. She flushed furiously and the pink spread over her skin, but she smiled, a hesitant one, and I realized as well that she was as scared of my rejecting her as I was scared of her rejecting me. No way in hell that I would ever, ever, let that happen.

I reached up to stroke her skin, so delicate and soft beneath my fingertips. She looked down, as if embarrassed that she had curves, that she had stretch marks, that she had any possible thing she could define as an imperfection. I kissed the bare skin of her tummy, over her thighs lightly, and looking up at her. "You are such a goddess."

She stroked my cheek and I moved into it, aching for the kindness, desperate for it point of fact. The thing I hadn't told Gabby, the thing I couldn't even convince myself to admit is that I hadn't been with anyone since Sara. I hadn't trusted anyone, her cruel mocking words rambled their way inside my head any time I tried to even talk with the opposite sex with anything but something mundane. "You're a stupid fool!" I flinched and pulled back the harsh words rattling around in my head, "You're too small to be satisfying." My breathing started coming out in ragged gasps as I pulled back from Gabby. "I can't believe that all I am left with having." The harsh ice-cold words drove their way into my skull so loudly I wanted to beg them to stop, please, not here, not now.

"Chris," Gabby sounded a million miles away, a sharp feeling on my cheek brought me back and staring into the softest, most gentle, loving pair of green eyes I had ever seen set in the face of an angel and framed with dark curls. "Chris?" I nodded slowly, shame and embarrassment filled me but she forced me to look at her. "I'm right here," she kissed my lips, fingers stroking my skin with a touch so gentle it burnt like hot coals. "Focus on me, I'm right here, I'm the one with you. Not her."

I nodded and watched her, watched her as she released the most beautiful and perfect breasts I had ever laid my eyes on. My mouth positively salivated for a taste of her skin and the warm green fire that burned in her eyes as she looked down at me. I almost felt attractive, like this goddess could somehow be interested in the nothing that was me.

She stripped out of her panties, leaving her completely naked before me but for the moonlight that wrapped her in its touch. Her entire body exquisite and perfect in ways that defied any description by the old ones and their vivid tales of their goddesses. Mine was entirely unique onto herself. Without a word, she moved slowly, pulling my shirt off with some meager help from me. I looked like shit, I knew it. Her eyes narrowed as she helped free my upper torso and I flinched slightly. "Sorry."

Her lips found mine again, a soft kiss, impassioned but not rough, this was gentle and soothing, careful and tender. "You are so beautiful," she breathed, looking down at me, her fingers tracing over my chest raising chills in her wake. "It's just the bruises," she looked back at me, eyes troubled, "I don't want to hurt you."

"Please don't stop," I begged, not even caring about something so frivolous as dignity before this woman, before my goddess. "I promise, I'll tell you if you hurt me." Yeah fucking right, every time she touched me I was in heaven. She hesitated and I looked up at her, "please."

She smiled, it was a gentle smile, "I want to, don't ever misunderstand that Chris, I've been wanting this forever, you just kept pushing me away so much that I was worried my biggest fantasy would never come true." Her biggest fantasy? Me pushing her away? Well, I guess I had, it was easier to shove her away than to give in to this insanity that was now muddling my mind.

"I always wanted you too," I confessed quietly. "I was just too scared, especially after Sara, that you were way out of my league.

"Oh Christopher." She fell to her knees on the sleeping bag in front of me and kissed me hard, her hands skimming over my skin with a rough, desperate, and yet delicate. Her lips pulled away to cover my features with soft butterfly kisses and I savored each one. "You are so much more than you'll ever know."

I had no will to even speak, Instead I fell back pulling her over my body, I was in no shape to do anything but having her on me. Thank the gods she took the hint, she ripped my jeans down and I flinched. "Sorry, I know I'm not big but I can-."

Her lips cut me off again, I could get used to this, but still fear gnawed at my belly, her fingers sliding over my cock, squeezing and my back arched. "You're perfect because you're you." She looked down at me and her eyes widened before she looked back up at me. "If she ever thought you were small she must have something like throwing a hot dog down a hallway."

I laughed at her crudeness, fuck it hurt, but damn did it feel good to let out all the pain and the shame, especially as she stroked me to near insanity. Gods, it felt so good to be touched again. No, correct that, it felt so good to be touched by my Gabrielle. "Fuck," I whimpered, "baby, you need to stop." She froze immediately thinking she was hurting me, I struggled to breathe. "It's been a long, long time," I hoped she understood the implication, "I won't last long."

Her smile was delicate. "Me too," she blushed more, "I think I was waiting for this." she stroked my cheek her eyes warm, "for you." I knew that feeling.

She slid over me and we both groaned, long, loud, with the gods and stars as a witness to our affection, to our joining, to us. She moved slowly, her body a wet velvet glove that seemed to fit me perfectly. Still, I knew I wouldn't last and I refused to be the jerk that took his own pleasure without giving any in return. The next time will be better. I silently promised her as she rode me, my fingers sliding down, feeling her wet folds, Christ, she was so wet. I loved it. I slid my fingers over the delicate nub of nerves and slid around in a tight circle loving the sweet moan that came from her lips.

"Oh yes, yes," her moans were breathy, her hands on my chest were an exquisite sort of pain that hurt like hell but it felt way too damn good to stop. I needed her, I needed this. I shuddered with every wet slap of flesh on flesh and I growled out, shuddering. I was so close, I hadn't even bothered masturbating in the last month. I watched her breasts bouncing with every thrust of her hips against mine. Sweet succulent fruit that begged to be touched, to be tasted. I latched my mouth on one. "Oh fuck, yes!" She cried out, thrusting harder, bucking like some wild beast as I swallowed her perky nipple into my mouth.

I felt my own orgasm coming up hard and fast, it came towards me like a Mack truck and I was preparing for impact. "Cum for me Gabby, cum for me." I threw my head back groaning out as I struggled to hold on as I looked up into her beautiful green eyes. "Cum for me, now!"

We cried out together, screaming our pleasures to the heavens above. I felt her whole body shuddering around me as I released myself into her wet and warm body, her fingers smoothing over my cheek, it was perfect. She, was perfect. She collapsed beside me but before I could even move she instead cuddled herself closer to me, as though afraid I would move and try to hurt myself, which I would. I felt, unreal, my toes were numb, my breathing was hard and ragged, but everything felt perfect, most of all, she felt perfect. I felt myself fading, but I clawed myself back to the surface enough to kiss her, and with a heroic surge of effort whisper a truth to her that I couldn't hold back anymore. "I love you." Then blackness wrapped me up in a warm, tight, welcoming embrace into a dreamless sleep.

I awoke to the same sharp pain now delightfully accented by a loud and annoying beeping, it sounded, regular. What the shit? I tried opening my eyes but it was like they were crusted together.

"Chris?" Gabby's voice, she sounded frightened and relieved.

"Gabby." I tried talking but my voice came out as a mouthful of nonsense, my throat felt so dry it was like I had swallowed down several pounds of cotton. What the fuck was going on. I felt something press against my lips. "Drink." Gabby's voice was firm and insistent. I didn't argue. I sipped the water from what felt to be a straw and after a few sips I fell back, exhausted. I barely cracked my eyes open and was blinded by the bright lights. What the serious fuck! I groaned and closed them again. Gabby took my hand.

"Keep your eyes closed," what the fuck was Dad doing here? Was I dying or something? "It's Tuesday afternoon." Where the hell had Monday gone? "You got pneumonia and passed into an unconscious state. Gabrielle stayed with you all of Monday but when you weren't waking up she got scared and rushed down and got help. The doctor said that if you hadn't been rescued when you were," his voice cracked slightly, "you might not have made it." I squeezed Gabby's hand reassuringly, my right one felt like it was in a cast. "Gabby told us what you did, that was damn fine of you, I'm glad I raised you proper to take care of a lady." He did, and I would be sure to treat Gabrielle with positively reverence and worship. "One broken are and two broken ribs ain't that bad for what happened to you though your swim in the water to try and clean off likely didn't help your situation but thankfully you didn't puncture a lung." What the, I hadn't gone, ah, got it, that's what Gabby had said we had done. I laughed silently to myself at her embarrassment and likely mortification, I squeezed her hand, and this time she squeezed back and I relaxed. Content. "Ah, that looks to be your mom walking in the hallway."

"Stepmother." I corrected, though I did love Carol to pieces.

"I don't know why you can't call her your mother," my Dad huffed quietly, "you treat her as any son should." I knew better than to answer that, because if she had been my mother, what I shared with Gabby would have been wrong, no matter how right it felt, and that, I refused to have happen.