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daryldixonfanfiction · 6 months ago

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What you fight for! pt.12 - hush, hush, hush (*18+)

Masterlist

Summary: Running low on food Daryl eyes an abounden’t strip mall….

Warnings: *18+, SMUT!, quickie, age gap, unprotected p in v, fingering, Daryl being the king of consent because he's a gentleman, mutual pining, fluff, Daryl so in love he calls her beautiful and an angel, disturbing walker encounter, subtle implied una!iving of toddler (not by Daryl or carecter), protective!Daryl, pregnancy symptoms, attempt of abortion, vomiting, anxiety, angst.

wc. 6.1k

Daryl didn't need to see Julia cry to know she was still sad…and deeply so.

It was evident in the way she looked at him, as if to tell him something, but each time he was left waiting for something she could not say. It was almost as if she was scared about something, and she had been, she had voiced it that night, desperately sobbing into his chest,

“No! They are gonna find us! And - and, they’ll kill you and then they are gonna rape me!”

The last words had made his blood run cold. And the thought of those men, or any other man thinking Julia was ‘free game’ triggered that same protective instinct that made him say what he did.

And he had men’t it, just like he had said it.

For Julia soothing came natural but for him it was still new. He was still learning to be soft, to kiss her more gently and not rush into it, mindful of how she seemed to prefer softness. Almost every night she had looked at him with those pleading brown eyes and he couldn't find it within himself to deny the intimacy being inside of her. Before he had viewed sex as a simpele primitive desire to be met, but with her… It was far deeper. It had become a way to show what he couldn't say out loud - the affection that burned in his heart, to connect and protect.

The intimacy of touche.

Her hands on his face, the way she brushed hair from his eyes and the way she looked at him. The feeling of her soft hand in his was the sweetest touches he had ever felt before, and Daryl couldn't help but yearn for what could be, if she was his and he hers. To belong with someone, to belong for someone.

Whatever this was slowly blooming between them he found himself struggling to navigate true those feelings. He wasn't sure what he felt or it was more what to name those feelings, if there was even a label for it? But then sometimes he knew what he felt, especially in the night with the confidence of intimacy he could fully express himself and then in the day time all of a sudden he didn't, and it would go on like that, a repeating cycle.

Julia nodded tiredly to his wakeup call - still blinking past the short nap as she stood, Daryl took her by the arm to assist her sleepy body in standing, taking notice how color drained from her face and he assumed it was due the lack of nutrition.

Larwill, a smalltown in Indiana came to view, in their search of food Daryl navigated them upon a road, train tracks crossing across it. On his guard, his senses are hyper alert and aware. His eyes scan everything: the fallen leaves that blew on the road, the surrounding buildings, walkers and always checking his back ensuring no one was on their tail. Eyeing a strip mall along the town's map, Daryl steers them off the road to cut true a neighborhood, but before he can Julia tugs at his arm, bringing him to a halt. They stand on the train tracks, and Julia begins like many times before,

“Daryl…”

He stood there waiting, his eyes softening, “Yeah?” he prompted. He could see her swallow nervously before the next words came out,

“I’m…I’m…”

And he could see her trying and he hadn't pushed her before, but this time he did, questioning,

“You’re what?”

It was af she didn't know were to look as he was studying her face, her delicate lines, the way her dark curls turned golden in the autumn sun, but his mane focused was her voice, what she was trying to say, and then finely it came,

“I’m p- anemic.”

Anemic? Iron deficiency.

Daryl took the information in and finding truth in her eyes he moved closer to examine her face. Julia let him, he pulled down her lower eyelid and indeed the inside layer was a pale pink, not a vibrant red like he knew it should be. Daryl was no doctor but it was evident that it was like she said, understanding one would be unwell when lacking iron. He took her chin, tilting it side to side as he questioned,

“You need medicine for that, right?”

“I will be fine without them,” Julia insured. “Just… wanted to tell you is all.”

Daryl hummed in understanding. It was good that she did and he had known something was wrong. He just wished she had told him sooner and he had noticed Julia had a knack for not telling him when she was feeling unwell, like when she had twisted her ankle she had never once complained, neither from that bruise around her throat that was now gone.

Releasing her chin the autumn breeze blue her hair into her eyes, Julia tamed the curls away, securing it behind her ear. It was easy to get lost in her beauty. The brown of her eyes coming out in the sun, like a pool of honey or a leaf falling from the trees. His gaze drifted upon the road behind, because even though the store encounter happened many days ago it still pulled at him. It was a very scary thing what beauty could make bad people do.

Daryl knew it was selfish for many reasons, to have thoughts of hiding Julia from the world as he pulled her hood over her head, Julia watched with a confused expression. He did it in an act of protection, as if counseling her appearance would work against any prying eyes.

“That’s better,” Daryl stated almost to himself as he adjusted it so it would cover her face as much as possible.

“Daryl, are you trying to hide me or something?” Julia questioned.

He took a deep breath, before he answered, “You should keep it on.”

“Why, it’s uncomfortable?” Julia poutted, adjusting it out of her eye line.

“Just listen to me, okay.”

“Fine,” Julia relent’s. ”but only if you tell me why.”

And how did he explain it without causing more fear? Adjusting the hood back down to his liking, he stated,

“You’re pretty.”

He thought it was self explainable what he was insinuating, but somehow he had offended her, maybe even anger her.

“Are you trying to make fun of me Dixon?”

“No, of course not.” She did not like being called pretty, noted. “You are very beautiful,” he corrected, and Julia blinked as if surprised, he continued, “I’m not trying to scare yah, but if we run into bad people we don’t want to draw the wrong attention. Yah, understand?"

Julia's face fell at the words and he knew he had failed, and terebully so. Now she was certainly frightened.

“Fuck,” he sighs under his breath. “I ain’t good at this,”

“It’s okay,” Julia reassured. “I know you mean well.. right?”

Daryl nodds.

He could see the worry build behind her eyes and the uneasiness in her posture. Softly with the intent to comfort some of that worry he guided her with a hand on her lower back,

“C'mon.”

“Why aren’t we following the tracks?” Julia hesitates in her step. “It's a straight shot, right?”

“It's better to take the road past the neighborhood, it’ll only take us a few more minutes tops.”

“But that’s twice as far.”

“No tracks,” he said matter of factly, ending her questions and they continued away from the tracks.

Finding their way to the strip mall and inside a casual dining restaurant two jars of pickled vegetables would be their meal for the day. Daryl pleases the jars on the kitchen floor were they sit against cabinets,

“Allwright, which one do yah wann't?”

Julia raised her head from his shoulder looking between the jar of pickles and pickled snap beans, the weight of her head returns against him,

“You pick, you found them,” she said tiredly.

Julia was too polite to speak up so he grabs one, her gaze following and he gives the pickles to her. Julia perked up, taking it eagerly in her grasp. As he opens his, digging in Julia struggles to open the lid.

“Here,” he beckoned, Julia handed the jar over and with a pope it was opened.

Julias lips peeked his cheek, thanking him for something as simple as opening a jar of pickles. But he couldn't contain the flutter in his stomach nor his chest swelling with pride. It was embarrassing how he was behaving and he had no control over it.

Julia sighs intently, loping her arm around his bicep as she leans against him having finished their meal and said,

“Can’t believe you found anything edible in here.”

"Yeah," he agreed, looking down where her head leans against him and her arm around his.

The feeling of them just sitting there with no words shared between them was nice, her presence calming in many ways. Her hand that wasn't around his arm he grasped in his, curiously comparing the obvious size difference between them. Hers was smaller, so much smaller her fingers ended where his began. Her skin feels soft compared to his own worn hands, her nails clean and clipped short.

“What are you doing?” Julia asked.

“There so small,” he stated.

And he had noticed a lot about her was - her head, her feet and her ridiculous small ears.

“You think so?” Julia said, placing her palm against his.

“See,” he said. The tips of her fingers reached where his fingers joined his palm, dwarfing hers. “they are.”

Julia laces her fingers with his, she looks up at him, a kind smile playing on her lips. He desperately wanted to kiss her, he always did.

“Daryl?”

“Yah?” he breathed, slowly leaning in for a kiss. But before his lips met hers, Julia asked,

“What you said before..did you really mean it?”

He searched her face, her eyes waiting for his answer - and maybe he hadn't realized it until now, but Julia was completely unaware of the beauty she redieted. He had assumed she knew, believing she had grown up hearing it her entire life. The impact she had on him, on people, children - how could someone like her not know he would never understand,

"Yah, way?”

“Just..no one has ever called me that before.”

And he couldn't believe someone as stunning as her had never been called beautiful. She was as breathtaking as her heart, her soul singing to him every time she looked at him. He must have gotten lost in her eyes, her soft breath brushing along his face. It felt like he would die if her lips weren't against his. So he fully leaned down, his lips enveloping her in a desperate kiss, and she always tested so…sweet.

Pulling away ever so slowly, studying her intently Julia blushed, he leaned in once more, and Julia looked away smiling coyly. He loved her smile, it sparked fireworks within, making his heart drum all the way to his fingertips. His thumb brushed against hers and with one swift pull he pulled her into his lap.

He secretly liked that he made her nervous - how innocent she was. She was something sweet in a dark world filled with everything that was the opposite of innocent. He felt ashamed of it though, even if knowing she was of age. Pressing her hand against his beating heart her eyes remained there on his hand on top of hers,

“Julia,” he spoke. “Look at me.”

To his command her brown eyes met his, he could feel the pull between them there, a burning force connecting them. His hand moved from her back to her neck, she leaned into it, her head tilting back in that perfect angel for a kiss. His mouth pressed to her forehead, then her cheek trying to resemble some of that softness, but his firm lips would never be as soft as hers.

“You have no idea, do yah?” he spoke against her skin.

“About what?” Julia breathed.

“How beautiful you are.”

He didn't know where the confidence came from, but he wanted her to know. He continued, his inner thoughts spilling from his lips,

“You're an angel and you don’t even know it.”

Julia took a breath to speak against it, before she could even tempt it he enveloped her in a kiss that turned into a passionate makeout session. Their lips fit like pulse peas, their tongues dancing until oxygen became life threatening… Breathing, breathing was like reaching the surfers, but he wouldn't mind if he drowned in the depths of her.

There breathes hot and heavy as he leaned his forehead against hers, that lower pressure formed in his lower stomach, his body heated and he asked with his eyes closed,

“Yes or no?”

Her hand cupped the side of his face, always soothing him with her touch and she spoke,

“You don’t have to ask, I’m always gonna want you Daryl.”

If his heart wasn't beating before it sure was now, it felt like it would burst true his chest and explode into all the colors of love.

“Yes or no, Julia?” he repeats. The urge to have her was almost overwhelming.

“Yes,” Julia breathed easely. “It will always be a yes.”

With Julia’s verbal permission he allowed himself to give in. His hand holding her to his beating heart traveled along her clothed body, from her hip, to her waist then her breast - feeling her nippell hardening under his touche. Unzipping her jacket slowly he held eye contact there, pretty brown eyes looking back at him. She was truly divine, an angel in his eyes. Her hand on his halted his motion, her jacket half opened and he respects her nonverbal request to keep it on.

Julia’s body was reacting to his touch so easily now. A few layers of clothing did not seem to bother her and she seemed to enjoy his touch just as much with it on, though he was desperate to feel her soft skin, to make her feel as good as he felt touching her.

Their lips connected and her sweetness envelopes him completely. The feeling of her caressing his cheek and the softness she provides was his safe haven. His erection rests against his stomach, painfully hard between their bodies. The feel of her reaching for it, her small fingers rubbing him over his pants drove him almost over the age and he had a feeling he would not last longer than a quickie. God help him.

He didn't know what came over him as he rose to his feet taking her with him in his arms. Julia yelped, holding onto him tightly around his neck. He didn't waste any time taking advantage of the kitchen's surfaces, placing her down on top of a prep table. He loomed over her, caging her in with his palms flat on the cold aluminum surface. He had visions about things he wanted to do to her, to have her on a table was one of many.

Julia stared up at him with dilated eyes, her hands slid from his neck to rest on his rising chest, he dipped his head to meet her lips. The kiss was intoxicating his senses, the world around them disappeared and she became it.

Fumbling with the belt, not wanting to break the kiss he opted to pull down his zipper instead, freeing himself of the tight confines of his pants. Julia looped her hands around his neck as he began undoing her jeans, and with a grunt he hoisted her onto him, pulling down her jeans in the same motion just enuff to expose her. He put her back down so her butt was right at the edge of the table and her front easy to access. Julia steadied herself, hands flat behind her as he stood between her spread legs, holding them up under her bent knees.

He begins to grind against her, then pulls the hem of her underwear to the side, holding it there to expose her completely to him. Arousal was glistening between her folds, he lobbed himself in it before he aligned himself and slid inside her opening. Julia’s head fell back as he washed himself disappear in and out with every stroke, his length glistening with her arousal. Julia sighs and a few ‘mmh’s’ of pleasure escapes her as he grunts with every push of his hips against her body. Her soft features was filled with pleasure, her mouth agape and he asked,

“Feel good?”

“Yes, yes,” Julia nodded with her eyes closed.

He had learned the angels she liked, the pace she preferred and what made her more vocal. So he fisted her undergarment to push himself deeper as he rubbed circles there with his thumb. Julia reacted heavily in response, her sounds becoming louder. The sound of her wetness filling his ears spurred him on and he pulled her in, cradling the back of her head, kissing her feverishly. He leaned into her further, the kiss deep as his movements. Caging her in with her legs on top of his shoulders he pulls away to watch her. She looked perfect like this, and to know she was enjoying what he was doing to her made him feel a deep pleasure as well feeling the incredible feeling of satisfaction.

He held her hips firmly, pushing himself in and out, and the more he focused on her beauty or her tight walls squeezing him combined with the friction..he was nearing climax faster than he'd like. Guiding her legs back to his sides he lifts her off the table into a stand and carry position, Julia clings onto him, wrapping her arms around his neck for support,

“Daryl, what are you doing?”

“It’s all right,” he calms. “I got yah, just hold onto me.”

“I don’t know Daryl. I- I have never done this before.”

“That’s all right, I’m doing all the work, okay?”

“Okay,” Julia agreed, the trust in her eyes making him want her even more.

Still inside of her he begins thrusting upwards using his hips while keeping his legs fairly straight, wimpers leaves her like never before. His arms carry all her weight as he trusts her up and down his length. The urge to go at full force and release himself had never been as strong as it was now. Desperately he was fighting against it looking up to the ceiling, because he liked to hold it off and be all wet and sweaty by the time he finished. So he tried to think about something unrelated that had nothing to do with him pushing himself inside her body. But his attempt to hold off his climax was almost impossible, the urge to give into that primal desire has him in an inner battle,

Thrust. God she feels good. Thrust. Stop thinking! Thrust. Fuck, she’s so tight. Thrust. Stop thinking, goddammit!

“Fuck, Julia. Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he grunts thrue his movment’s.

Julia was taking him so well, her sounds growing lower and lowder, it was his favorite thing to hear. And if he had known this was what it took to hear her like this - he would have had her in this position sooner.

It wasn't long before her legs began to shake, her arms pulling him into a desperate embrace feeling her near her height of pleasure like he did his own. Her walls began to tighten round him, squeezing him. Then her whimpers stopped as her pelvic muscles contracts vigorously, her body spasming in his arms as pleasure wrecks her body. And just the same blood rushes to his ears, the intense feeling surged through him and he erupts with a guttural growl as he stills inside of her completely.

It was an outer world experience, he had never experienced a climax so intense, it was spiritual in a way. It just lasted for an intense three or five seconds before his body felt completely numb, it was a miracle that he was still standing with her in his arms. A moment of clarity steadied his grip, her body becoming heavy as she completely relaxed against him, her breaths heavy as his own, their chests expanding and retracting angst one another. He felt himself soften inside of her and unwillingly slipped out into the cold air making him miss her warm walls instantly. Julia’s head rests against his shoulder, her breath hitting the crock of his neck and she looked… pale again. He knew he had to find that medecin before her condition worsened. Her eyes were barely opened, he tilted his head down to catch her gaze and he asked softly,

"Hey, you alright?”

Julia nodded tiredly against him in response.

He pleased her down on the table, tucking himself away and kissed the top of her head. Julia leans into it, with his fingers he brushes curls away that had fallen into her face, he worried he had done too much, that he had been too ruff in his moment of desire.

Julia slipped off the table to stand on her feet and pulled her jeans back on, her face becoming just as pale as it was before they had eaten.

“Yah sure, you're pale again,” he points out.

Tilting her chin upwards to cash her gaze, Julia stared up at him as if thinking and he worried that he really had done too much.. but then, a reassuring smile spread across her lips, and she said with that soft tone that filled his lungs with sweetness and made his heart drum,

“You’re so sweet, Daryl.”

And he wondered how someone like her could exist?

“Edison’s Apothecary and boutique,” Julia read out loud.

Daryl banged loudly on the entry, leaning his ear close to the door and listened for any indication a threat was inside, when nun did he began working the lock open with his knife.

Watching from behind she couldn't help but rewind what he had said, and how it made her feel. That he thought she was an angel and even called her…beautiful. Daryl was a passionate lover and a gentle one. The idea of actually telling him was always there, on the tip of her tongue. Telling him she was anemic was true, but it was not the whole truth, it was a white lie. She felt absolutely horrible for not telling him about the little life they had created and it was growing rapidly, each day waking to a bigger stomach.

Julia stared at the back of his head and she reached into her pockets secretly reaching for their baby underneath. Though she knew he wouldn't know if he saw, she was just being paranoid. Maybe it was because she knew she was with child and she could feel the difference there, though she was just over 7 weeks along now, her stomach looked like it was just bloated, like she had eaten a big burrito.

But she would eventually get so big to the point he would know and he would ask. What was she to say then? She didn't know how to go about a situation like this, and she felt very…vonerbulle when so much was at stake and it felt like she was not allowed to think of herself, she was afraid to be selfish and she desperately wanted to fulfill what she was set out to do. But becoming closer along their journey his soft side did not only exist when they made love. It was in the moments when he worried, in his attentive gaze and in the subtle touches true oute the day that made her feel safe. It felt like he genuinely cared for her on a deeper level that secretly made her hope his feelings were one of love, like her own.

Daryl locked back at her and Julia took her hands out of her pockets to adjust her hood.

“Stay back,” Daryl ordered.

Julia washed with a yearning gaze as Daryl swung the door open, his broad frame entering. And oh, how she needed to hear those three syllables of love. Because…if Daryl told her he loved her, she would feel secure enuff to tell him the truth.

“Clear!” Daryl announced.

Julia stepped inside. A wife of a sickening odor makes her stomach turn and a gag escapes her, but she stands against the urge to throw up, forcing the bile down.

“What are you doin’?” Daryl questioned.

“Don’t you smell that?” Julia said, trying not to breathe through her nose.

It was so strong the smell felt loud.

Daryl didn't say anything, he just looked back at her with that unreadable gaze she knew were thoughts behind. Inwardly Julia panicked for just a second, realizing what she just said. But he didn't seem to catch on.

They continued to venture inside the small gift store. Julia shines her flashlight on the counter table, there were polaroid pictures of a happy little boy who couldn't be older than three placed beneath the dusted glass counter. Postcards and souvenirs are stacked on the shelves behind, keychains with names caught her attention. Turning the counter rack until her eyes landed upon a familiar name, her heart ached with a forgotten sadness in her chest.

There were so many people she never had gotten to say goodbye to that was gone.

She moved on to Daryl who was working a counter shutter open, shining her flashlight upon the big letters above.

Pharmacy, it read.

The counter shutter rolled up revealing a small rome stocked with medication. Daryl jumped up and over the counter, Julia followed. Inside Daryl begins skimming true the bottles and askes,

“What did yah take for anemia?”

Julia wrecks true her brain, trying to remember what her mother used to get her and then she remembered,

“Vitamin-B12, folic acid or just iron pills.”

“Allwright, there should be here somewhere,” he mumbles as he goes through the bottles on the shelves, reading each etiquette intently before placing it back and moving on to the next.

Jullia looked around herself but she wasnt searching for anything really dreading the idea of having to take any sort of medicine again. She had an aversion for it, or more so had grown to hate it. But it was her own fault having shared that she was anemic and did not have the guts to tell him what she was planning to and this time she was the closest to actually saying it, but just the same she got scared.

An open shelf cabinet stands between them and she can hear Daryl on the other side continue going to true bottles of pills as he grumbles incoherently to himself. The smell was even stronger in this part of the store and she felt like she was on the constant verge of gagging and at the same time felt drawn to know where it came from.

“Yah, finding anything?” Daryl askes.

“No, nothing,” she answered.

Julia felt bad, she wasn't even looking. But as her eyes wandered they landed on a small bottle of misoprostol. Looking at it closely there was a clear warning for pregnant women wich caught her attention and on the contrationing/warning, it read,

:Do not take if you are pregnant and do not become pregnant while taking this medicine because it can cause miscarriage…

That was the only thing she needed to know what this was and what it could be used for. And Julia had known she had to find a pharmacy and here she was face to face with that choice. It was important to her to feel free to take medication if she so desired. And If the world never ended and she found herself in this situation in the state of Georgia, where it was illegal to perform any attempt of abortion after six weeks, she would be committing a felony, punishable by sentence of imprisonment up to 5 years. Knowing that no pharmacist could refuse to give her the drug nor be questioned for what she was going to use it for felt freeing just as much as it terrified her.

The thought of bringing innocence into the world of uncertainty and chaos, where evil lurks in every corner, where one wrong step was death or worse feels overwhelming. Wanting to do the right thing was hard when she didn't know what the right thing was. Was she evil if she ended the pregnancy or was it cruel of her to keep it?

A loud thud caught their attention, halting them in what they were doing. Daryl moved to the counter and listened to the sound that repeated. Julia was quick to hide the misoprostol in her pocket, gauging him if it was a treat or not.

“Sounds like it’s stuck,” Daryl said.

“Walker?” Julia asked, leaning over the counter trying to see where the noise came from.

“Yeah,” Daryl affirmed, going back to what he was doing.

The sound continued, and she didn't know if it was curiosity or the feeling of uneasiness that something else was in there with them that led her feet to investigate. Carefully she exited the pharmacy. Her heart was pounding in her throat as she shined the flashlight on the backroom door. Her gut screamed danger but continued through the door that stands ajar and she went inside the dark room with her knife in hand. The source of the bad smell was somewhere in here, the air was moist and shining the flashlight along the dirty floor she could see kids comic’s littering the floor. Beginning to feel that urge to vomit she forced herself to continue further led by the flashlight revealing a worn crib that was left empty. Empty boxes are mesley stacked against the wall, and the wall looks damaged, the wight paint withering away and peeling off. Big spots of black mold grow along it, like a dark trail of spots.

Julia flinches and turns hastily to a sound beside her. A female walker with a broken leg leys on the ground barely moving, her jaw gone and her body and clothes almost fully decomposed. HUSH, HUSH, HUSH, is written on the wall and to her absolute horror, a baby's shoe floats in a sink filled with bloody fluid.

Her heart sank to her stomach and she pieced everything together. They had been smelling… that little boy she had seen from the counter, the same shoe floating in the sink. His own mother had smothered her baby to death, presumably from walkers hearing the crying and trying to get in, explaining the handprints outside.

Julia stumbled backwards out of the room knocking over souvenirs that crashed to the floor.

“What the hell you doing?!” Daryl emerged from his surge, but when he looked at her his eyes changed and his tone softend, “Hey, what's wrong?”

No words came out instead her stomach lurched and her hand clasped over her mouth. She bolted outside, her chest burned as stomach acid rose up and down on to the pavement. Standing hunched over with hands on her knees to steady herself she spitted to rid her mouth of the foul taste, feeling how her throat was strained and hurt from the intense force. Feeling herself on the verge of blacking out she tried to focus on breathing and slowly the outside world came back. The white noise recedes to give way to bird song, the sun warming her face and feeling of the refreshing touch of the autumn breeze steadies her. The distant call for her name became clearer, she focused on that, his familiar touch grounding her.

Daryl was holding her firmly by the shoulders, his blue eyes filled with a desperation she had never seen before. He guided her to stand up from her hunched over position, then pulled the hood over her head, reaching out and taking her hair and tucking it away. She watched with eyes that glimmered and a face that must be noticeably unwell as she felt. Daryl stared into her eyes for a moment causing her chin to wobble. She tried to speak, but her voice was shaking so much she could hardly get the words out,

“There was…she…”

“I know, I know,” Daryl soothed softly.

She knew he must have seen it too by the look on his face, but he didn't know the full extent to her reaction to such a horrifying sight. If she kept the baby would it only live so shortly to meet such a gruesome end? To smother one's baby to death because it was either that or watch it be eaten alive, because…a baby didn't know how to be quiet?

Daryl pushed his water into her hand but she denied it weekly.

“You need to drink,” he insisted.

But she denied it again with a shake of her head. Even the thought of a sip of water made her nauseous - then she looked up at him with pleading eyes that burned,

“Hold me, please hold me.”

Daryl enveloped her into a soothing embrace, her head tucked beneath his chin and he held her there tightly to himself. The sound of his heart against her ear and the calming strokes on her back calms her as she breathes him in. The hug communicates a deep empathy, there was no need for words, just him and only him at this moment. And Julia had decided what she needed to do, what she had dreaded and felt so torn between.

A deep sadness fills her heart by the weight of her choice, but it was the right thing. The possibility of such a cruel end had awoken a deep fear for their unborn child, so before they went to bed she excused herself to do her business further in the woods from where they had set up camp for the night.

Julia sits on the forest floor with two pills in her palm and a bottle of water in the other. She inhales a shaky breath before popping them into her mouth, swallowing down with water. For a moment she sits there and lets it sink in…but was this what she truly wanted? The sound of leaves blowing in the wind and the last birdsong singing she took a breath, in and out trying to soothe some of that anxiety. Looking down at the medecin in her hand a deep regret settels in her stomach and her invoice screamed,

No, what have I done..What have I done.

In her panic she forces fingers down her throat, making herself vomit out the pills she had swallowed. Sitting there in the moss covered ground she realized that truly she wanted to keep the baby and she had known that all along. Putting a hand against her stomach as she closed her eyes she imagined hearing its heartbeat and how it would be to see it on a screen of a ultrasound.

“Sorry, my little one. I’m never gonna do anything that’s gonna harm you again, I promise,” she whispered to the baby.

“What are you doing?” a deep voice startled her from behind.

Julia recognised it as Daryl. He walked up to her, making her fumble with the bottle, hiding it away and spilling some of the pills in the process that she hid with moss just in time before he could notice.

“Nothing,” she lied, standing on her feet. “I just tripped on my way back.”

His blue eyes searched hers, narrowing to the water bottle in her hand but he didn't say anything. Instead he walked her back to camp and they settled into their sleeping bags, his arms holding her just as tightly as when he had embraced her. And even though she felt the safest in his arms, enveloped by his protective warmth she couldn't find the courage to tell him. The fear of Daryl's reaction scared her deeply.

Because he wouldn't let her continue with their journey, surely. He wouldn't want her around...Whether it be because of selfish reasons or because he felt she would be in

unnecessary danger. She felt he would be the type to view pregnancy as a time of fragility...He already treated her like she couldn't protect herself and she knew if he wanted to he would hide her from the world. Maybe she was spyreling but that was how it had felt when he said she needed to cover herself up, to not bring any unwanted attention. And she knew he only did what he thought was right, that he didn't know any better.

And with that thought she drifts away, too tired to fight sleep any longer.

Part 13 masterlist

#apocalypse #daryl dixion imagine #daryl dixon #daryl dixon fanfiction #daryl dixon smut #fanfics #twd fanfiction #twd daryl #whatyoufightfor!#pregnancy #love story #zombie #post apocalyptic

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