#a weird mix of. im not depressed but im not. doing well.

[thatdude-noah]

sometimes im doing great and im happy and my depression isn't hitting me too hard. and then my intrusive thoughts become debilitating and suddenly the world is awful again!

[ganondoodle]

About Shargon: What kind of compound are their horns made of? Is it the same as his teeth or skeleton? What’s the reason behind their glow? I think it’s really cool so I thought I’d ask

Thank you for the ask!

so, alot of demon anatomy revolves around their demonic heart and its blood (which is concentrated energy/magic- the color of which is determined by their elemental type, Shargon is type lightning, which is generally a mid blue going into greenish, but there are always slight color variations even between the same types) their bones too are made of crystalized demonic blood, its coated in a black layer of depleted blood (so the substance without energy) that acts as a sort of armor and makes the bones more durable and able to withstand even alot of bending (when a demon shape shifts their bones have to decrystalize to some extent to shift into different forms and sizes, its really uncomfortable or even painful depending on how well trained they are or in stressful situations since that process is something that needs to be done right or they end up really messy and vunerable) bones are also hollow and filled with demonic blood, it also aids their flexibility and the shapeshifting process and makes sure that if one is broken its quickly healed again since the bone doesnt have to decrystalize first

teeth and claws are not hollow and lack the black layer bc it eases using magic/energy through them and makes them harder to break, unlike the bones they are as hard as possible instead of flexible; the liquid blood isnt necessary since a broken tooth or claw usually gets discarded entirely and regrown from the ground up

horns are a mix of both, they dont have a black layer but are hollow (at least partly through) and filled with an even more concentrated version of demonic blood, very similar to heartblood (only found in the heart, the most concentrated version with a similar consistency; like a thick floaty liquid) and connected to it (you could see or feel a pulse in Shargons horns) but it lacks the genetic information actual heartblood carries- horns act mainly as a sensing aid ... like antenna in a way, or how whales melons work, it aids in sensing energy nearby, navigation, limited long range communication or if an energy wave that was sent out has hit something like a living demon .. or a dead one if theres still some remaining energy left (works best between demons of the same elemental type, but isnt limited to them and also depends on how skilled or mighty a demon is- for example, Eadrya, type water but extraordinarily powerful, could sent out even a really weak energy wave and they would be able to sense if it hits Shargon while Shargon himself might just feel there was some energy, but not from who or what type) and can pick up frequencies of distress calls that have lost the hearable part

the downside to that is if a horn was to break it might actually be the most painful thing to happen to a demon, even worse so if it draws blood, its like stabbing the most sensitive nerve that goes through their head and spine and heart, depending on the severity of the injury it might be paralyzing or drive a demon temporarily mad- worse than a stabwound into the heart itself

not all demons have horns, they are a very diverse kind of creatures that are each built better for different things (Eadrya doesnt have horns, the extreme amount of energy at their disposal pretty much closes any gap horns could have made in aiding senses- an advantage being less vunerability, a downside though is easy disturbance of anything relating to those senses by other energy types or frequencies .... and a general downside to Eadryas .. overproduction of magic even, is being basically the most detectable demon in the world due to them constantly emitting energy at very high levels if they are in good health)

(since Shargon (he/they) is the main example here, hes a demon that is built for speed and flexibility, for quick strikes out of the shadows, his bones are thin and bendable, his teeth are long, sharp and angled in various ways so if he bites he can lock it down hard without escape, even if the force of his bite isnt the strongest in itself- he can turn his head fully around multiple times (like an owl but worse) and his throat is largely made of pure muscle (the most muscle on him is his throat and to the big primary arms) perfect to bite and pull and twist until whatever he bit into gives out, getting him off of something is rather impossible without doing massive damage to it in the process (unless he lets go willingly of course)

-since i compared him to Eadrya (they/them) already- they are quick but only in water, their sheer size, thick skin, bones and well, body is really hard to damage, their teeth are small and all in the same shape in two rows on both sides, their maw is really wide and their bite force is pretty strong- if they bite it is with the intent to bite clean through, if that doesnt work they would need to let go and go for it again here older art but just to give you a general idea for Eadrya (demon form):

Thor (any pronouns) is another one that is really different- they are massive and armored with thick, hard plates, they are slow and have little mobility but are nigh impossible to take down unless you know exactly how; they dont have alot of teeth, rather small and probably not very sharp either and due to her two big tusks going forward its rather hard to actually get to anything to bite into, if she were though it would be somewhat akin to alligators (i think) that just smash their massive bones together to break whatever is in between with little to no actual 'biting' going on

(rather outdated art that i still, somehow, like- her humaoid form:

and an even MORE outdated ancient doodle of her demon form:

the only somewhat accurate part is the general shape and head, though the mouth isnt accurate anymore either ... barely anything is but something is better than nothing and the roughly lobster inspired design idea is still currently the idea)

OC lore ramble over :3

[phagodyke]

my supervisor AND my manager both aren't in today so I'm just practicing shit... im boored

[lordarsonizzzzt]

Ask and you shall receive. Glass, Kondraki, Clef, Bright and Iceberg with an S/O who loves to cook and bake lots of stuff cuz that's their love language and they also like to pamper the doctors a lot

thank u very much

SCP STAFF WITH AN S/O THAT LOVES BAKING AND COOKING

CHARACTERS: SIMON GLASS, KONDRAKI, ALTO CLEF, JACK BRIGHT, JULIAN ICEBERG.

DR GLASS

✴︎ Simon comes tired from work a lot, his patients are all lost cases, Clef almost shot him 'by accident' and Bright bite him.

✴︎ Imagine how he feels when he comes home and sees you with an apron and the smell of a home-cooked meal hits him in the face.

✴︎ He will shower you in praises, hugs and kisses.

✴︎ I think his love language is physical affection and words of affirmation.

✴︎ You usually cook him his breakfast, he usually has lunch at work but sometimes you even pack him some food, then he comes back home and dinner is served!

✴︎ On weekends you bake him cakes, cupcakes or anything that is sweet, Glass has a huge sweeth tooth and you have to keep him from trying to eat the mix or frosting.

✴︎ He is really thankful by all you do for him and will take you on well planned dates or have day that are all about you.

✴︎ After all, you are his world.

DR KONDRAKI

✶ Man loves you so so much, like I always say, he needs that domesticity in his life.

✶ He would text you something like 'work s stressing me out today, are you free to talk a bit?'

✶ And you will be cooking him some goodies while you both are speaking thru the phone.

✶ When he comes back home and sees you cooked for him he is going to cry, will hug you and kiss all your face and lips and god I want a boyfriend.

✶ Really grateful, feels like he owns you.

✶ If you work at the foundation you will bring him lunch and you both will eat in his office, he won't stop complenting your cooking.

✶ You are the only reason he has a stable eating time, if you didn't cook for him he would live on take out and alcohol.

✶ His love language is acts of service and words of affirmation.

DR ALTO CLEF

✉︎ Do not cook when this man is around, he is going to mess with it, eat the mix, or eat the butter.

✉︎ Loves it when you bake, will buy all the things you need to make a cheescake and will look at you with puppy eyes.

✉︎ Make him lunch to take to work please he can't stand the fucking shit they sell over there it's the same food every day.

✉︎ He will always come home like 'WE ARE A PLACE THAT IS MORE POWERFUL THAN THE GOVERMENT, WE HAVE ENOUGH MONEY TO MAKE ALL THIS FUCKING WEIRD ASS CELLS BUT THEY CAN'T AFFOARD SOMETHING THAT ISN'T SALAD OR SOUP? IM NOT ASKING FOR A BOUFFET JUST ADD SOME NOODLES IN THERE IDK"

✉︎ So yeah just so he shuts up make him something.

✉︎ WILL BRAG in work about his s/o that, and i quote, "HAS SOME BUDTASTES AND UNDERSTANDS MY PAIN BECAUSE WHAT THE FUCK 05 COUNCIL SOUP IS THE BEST YOU CAN DO???"

✉︎ He is so mad about soup.

✉︎ Please please please teach him to bake (he just wants to spend time with you, will actually not learn anything and is going to mess everything up)

✉︎ His love language is gifts, he will bring you about anything that makes him think about you.

✉︎ "I found this weirdass chef plushie and I said 'my sweet crab babe is a chef to!' so i bought it."

✉︎ He calls you the weirdest nicknames known to man.

✉︎ I love writting about Clef I can make it so angsty or so fluffy.

DR BRIGHT

⚠︎ This man. He's tired, he is depressed, so when he comes home and finds out you made food for him? He just breaks, everytime.

⚠︎ He will be eating and out of nowhere will look at you, smile and start crying.

⚠︎ Has a sweet tooth too, if you bake him cupcakes he is going to melt on the spot.

⚠︎ Your food makes him feels good, like a wave of happiness just washed over him.

⚠︎ He once was looking something in his backpack and found you left him a box with a lot of cookies and he had to fight the tears.

⚠︎ Really, this guy does a lot and barely gets any recognition, his parents are shitty, his brothers are all trash expect TJ, who he wants to take out of this filthy place, so you coming in and just caring for him is so,,, so weird and makes him sad, because when you are gone, who will be there for him?

⚠︎ He'll have days when he doesn't want to see you, will lock himself in the bathroom and cry for hours. He wants you to hate him, to never want to see him again and just stop caring for him. (im not reflecting no)

⚠︎ Other days he'll just be so clingy, he's glad you are by his side and are willing to help him with his shitty life.

⚠︎ He will sneak you in the foundation so you can meet TJ, he's going to watch you two interact and will have a small smile in his face.

⚠︎ His love language is acts of service and physical affection.

⚠︎ He will do anything you need. Want him to go do grocery shopping? Done, want him to fix something that broke in the house? Done, want him to just carry you around because you are royalty? DONE.

⚠︎ Please be pacient with him, he fears death more than anything but not upon him, but upon his loved ones.

DR ICEBERG

❆ You were a one night stand at first, he still worked at the military when you two got together.

❆ He woke up and didn't find you next to him so he just assumed you went home, then the smell of bacon and coffee hit his nose and he found you there, in the kitchen making breakfast for both of you.

❆ Even before he started working at the foundation he was a little bit of an asshole, but never to you, he was warm with you.

❆ You would be making dinner and he would come up from behind and hug you, you would be too surprised because he was gone for months on some mission.

❆ Now he was cold, but never to you. He may not be too physical now but he still smiles and jokes, he has a really crude sense of humor now and he always looked ready to snap. But to you? he was still Julian, the guy that always wore combat boots even on summer.

❆ You will always bake him cookies, croissant, even a whole ass cake for him to take to work. 'You better share' you will say, he would remember that a little too late.

❆ His love language is physical affection, gifts and acts of service.

❆ Loves telling you everything that goes on on the foundation (the things he founds funny at least)

❆ You know that some guy got blown away because he threw a molotov at them and he survived, this other guy with the weird amullet got shot several times because he stole the cinnammon rolls from the 3 eyed blondie, you honestly think he does drugs sometimes.

[askcannibalistickitties]

ASK THESE GOOBERS ANYTHING!!!

(Nothing weird plz)

colt: -“IM NOT GAY” says the fruitiest man on earth

-One of the more “popular” kids.

-feels inferior to all his peers

-Hurts himself frequently from playing sports

-13!!

-GAD (generalized anxiety disorder)

-GAD does affect sports

-Has no idea how he even became friends with the group, kinda just got dragged in

-Tweaks whenever there’s a dog nearby

-“Am i a girl?”

-“Yes?”

-“No.”

-Relentlessly bullies 4th graders on roblox

-Divorced parents

-64 little white things

-Likes to wear layered jackets

-Doesn’t like being popular, it doesn’t mix well with anxiety

-Sometimes has panic attacks

-Likes picking up bugs and scaring Spoop shitless

-Cuddle piles with Donnie as bros do (PLATONIC BROMANCE💪)

-Has a cheeky smile

-Glitch forces him into at home fashion shows (he secretly enjoys it)

-Loves bubbles

-Nicknamed, Colts, Colty, and Cole by Glitch, Spoop, and Donnie (in that order)

-Felix.

Glitch: -Glitch loves space and her shoes have the NASA logo on them

-ADHD + depression (i swear not everyone’s depressed it’s just spoop and glitch)

-Loves to read

-Once burned a poptart in the toaster, was never allowed to even attempt to cook again

-Has no idea where the hell the stars come from, her dad and mom both don’t have them, nor a family history of them

-Glitch is always wearing a sweater or hoodie

-Despises PE

-In a robotics club

-Has the entire Hamilton script memorized

-Donnie and her nerd about their interests to each other

-Sometimes gets panic attacks over loud noises

-Favorite animal is the hedgehog

-Had a Danganronpa phase

-Likes to play with spoop’s checkered belts, thinks checkers are cool

-Doesn’t have any cool nicknames:(

-Born june 19th, making her the youngest out of the group

Spoop: Spoop is 13, being born on January 21st (my birthday!!)

-Spoop has a weird fear of butterflies and moths, hence why she hates them

-Doesn’t have a set fashion style, anything alternative

-Absolutely loves the stuffed peppers their mom makes

-Anxiety + Depression

-Loves the smell of lavender

-Loves thrill, especially water slides

-Likes to swim, despite being a cat

-Doesn’t like ELA, hates writing

-Watched the ROTTMNT movie and sobbed

-Does the smolder face to jumpscare people, it’s actually really fun

-Spoop doesn’t eat food if they don’t like the texture

-Likes to play with slime

-Collects rocks (and eats them /hj)

-Thinks space is cool

-Takes a photo of every sunset he sees

-Cannot sit still

-Once wandered reddit when they were 8, she’s still traumatized

-Sleeps with a gazillion plushies

-Is nicknamed “poop” by Donnie, gets mad every time he’s called it

-Can eat sour food like it’s the end of the world, it ends up hurting the roof of her mouth

Donnie: Donnie has asthma and always carries an inhaler on them

-Cannot handle spicy things for the life of it

-Freaks people out, Spoop and Glitch are kinda their only friends

-that’s fine though bc Donnie absolutely despises socializing

-Donnie can be very quiet while walking and sometimes accidentally sneaks up on people, this gives spoop a mini heart attack each time they get snuck up on

-Donnie’s dad was diagnosed with skin cancer when Donnie was six, at age seven Donnie’s dad died.

-Donnie’s mom is actually really nice and a bit spooky like her kid

-Donnie is 14, making it the oldest out of the bunch (spoop and glitch are both 13)

-Likes to read poems

-Uses words like “skibidi” ironically

-Absolutely despises their aunt, she’s a total bitch

-Was given the nickname “donns” by Glitch, “Freaky Clown Dude” by Spoop, and “Glue God” by Spoop

-Its ear was clipped as a child, no one really knows why

-Choir kid, liked to sing upbeat pop songs

-soprano voice, always manages to impress Spoop

-Favorite subject in school is history

-Sometimes gets really giddy for no reason

-Salty > Sweet

-Absolutely loves rats

-Has an absurd amount of glue, that’s where they got the nickname Glue God

That’s all for Donnie >_<

[hearts401]

Hai :3 do u have any wacky wild michael hcs

oh do i!

both adult and teen. loser has been on my mind again.

He gets super fucking cold for no reason and blamed it on ghosts until after fnaf 6 where he brought it up as a joke and the ghost kids were like "...none of us did that" and now he's convinced theres a whole extra ghost after him. (it was cc he didnt mean to initially but cassidy thought it was funny)

He talked to the animatronics all the fuckin time. like he just. chatted with them. especially the fnaf 2 ones. charlie had to sit there and watch him talk to actual robots thinking they were kids. they werent and she told him that in fnaf 6 because she found it so fucking funny

clumsy as HELL i know that man was banging his knee in the SL vents and swearing under his breath

teen mike was also clumsy. probably split his lip on concrete all the time as a kid.

he was also the kinda kid to say "nah, check this out!!" and wake up in the hospital

this is a gross one but. he dealt with bugs a lot post scoop (especially. flies. and what comes with them. iykyk). he'd come into work on mondays smelling like a can of bug repellant. you wont believe what he showers with instead of water.

He was williams least favorite but they had a weird relationship between him moving out and elizabeths death. like some days william despised him and michael just wanted to blow them both up with his mind and some days he comes home like "Hey mike whats up want some pizza for dinner tonight?" and michaels like "fuck yeah why not."

he's henrys favorite afton as a teen and he knows it. and he uses it. Henry fuckin loved that kid he had the man wrapped around his finger. William also notices it and he gets mad at henry over it.

in relation to that, henry was really gentle with michael which was. not helpful im sorry 😭

mike sleeps pretty casually. hes not a light sleeper but not a deep sleeper. unless hes tired. if he hasnt been getting enough sleep youll know because he sleeps like a ROCK.

he fucking loves italian food. for no reason. he just does

he unironically eats beans on toast. He tried it as a joke and then just. never stopped.

he still has his foxy mask it just doesnt fit him. he tries it on again and it hurts his head

cannot afford to go out to eat often and GOD does he complain about it. he is SO FUCKING LOUD when he complains about it. he wants his takeout man

Loves animals but they hate him. A crow tried to take a bite out of him post scoop once nad he had to fight for his life. bro saw his family for a moment there

he is so polite most of the time but if you talk to him after his shift he'll fuck you up. rudest bitch on the block and he was an asshole teen so he knows how to run his mouth

he plays solitaire.

does not know about the context but whenever hes depressed he says "tomorrow is another day" because time moves on anyways!!!! also idk i think its neat

he ate shit in the middle of his shift once and bashed his face on one of the counters and his coworker found the blood the next day and managed to start a rumor that someone died there until michael came in to work with his face bandaged up.

these are so rambly but funny so im gonna keep going

skateboards <3 totally tried to show off and ate shit until william told him if he went to the hospital again he'd take the skateboard. he still ate shit. just hid it better.

taught evan to do a lot. If he didnt feel like bullying him (for an array of reasons, but the biggest is just. boredom. or loneliness. or a mix) he'd teach him something just because he could. skipping rocks, flying a kite. michael doesnt remember it very well but evan does

cassidy kicked him in the knee so hard he was limping for an hour and so he found the golden freddy suit and kicked it too at one point. she didnt feel it tho. and jumpscared him out of spite.

he loves dogs and once brought evan to see one because his friends were busy and he hates being alone and the dog bit the shit out of evan. foreshadowing.

oh yeah i totally think he gets lonely btw. do not leave that guy alone he will get very sad and pathetic!!!

im capping myself here because jesus christ.

[almostvermin]

uuuuh my tablet is basically overheating bc ive been drawing so hard for the call boy fan mv (WHICH I CANT WORK ON UNTIL NEXT WEEKEND FUCK MY STUPID BAKA LIFE) so. throws some incomprehesible sekai oc scribbles at you plus elboration

a little explaination of how the gacha system ive made up works. so bc i have 3 people in one unit (sunken starlight) plus 6 people in another (unnamed orchestra) (yes thats their unit name theres a reason okay) and 3 in the third unit (whihc i havent created yet but its gonna be a nightcord-esque thing) heres how the systems gonna work

4*, 4*, 3*, 2*. the orchestra guys will have 3 ocs at a time plus a vs. all cards are hakolims and mixed events can have any previous mixed card OR initial card (every character will have an initial 4*, which doesnt give you an outfit or hairstyle bc its their regular unit one).

also it'll go sunken starlight, unnamed orchestra, mix, [yet to exist], unnamed orchestra, mix

this is not a real game thats being made i am not that good at coding nor do i have that much dedication

okay so this one is for dami1. rockstar set i think. idk if you can see all that well but in the corner its called 2 to overcome our past resentment. basic summary:

erynn is pissed that damien and siobahnn keep "teaming up against her" when in reality her ideas are just shit

damien overreacts. bc its damien and his ego is fragile. so stops talking to erynn altogether.

so now erynn is sad and siobahnn is going to get to the bottom of this no matter what but damien doesn tknow that

damiens mother (who. has a l2d!!! yay for npcs) is like "kid you are acting weird and lonely again dont tell me your new friends dumped you" and ehs like. nooo.... i maybe dumped them.... and shes like talk to them goddamit. but he doesnt want to

he remembers he has a secret pocket dimension he can go to and goes there. but siobahnn is already there (TOTALLY NOT running those lyrics for the untitled track past len). she talks to damien in the sekai and explains how erynn is a little bit depressed bc she really wanted to make amends!! adn sehs really scared she came across accusatorially

damien tells her not to speak for erynn and she can find him herself. and siobahnn, poor social anixiety ridden girl she is, summons all the courage she has to tell him "WELL IM YOUR FRIEND TOO AND YOU GOTTA COME BACK BC WE MISS YOU >:(" except she whispers it rlly fast bc shes so scared of him still

and damiens like. oh. okay. i will. and yay forever!!

next day. siobahnn summons all the courage she has. and gives the lyrics to damien when he comes back like "REALLY SORRY I LIKED THE SONG THAT TAKES US TO A POCKET DIMENSION WITH MEIKO AND LEN IN IT I MADE US LYRICS FOR IT ITS OKAY IF YOU HATE THEM AND ALSO ME" then hides behind erynn despite being a full five inches taller than her.

and damien loves them and untitled track has lyrics :D and that is the commision song for the event

but yeah the cards themselves. damien has the. emo red spikey guitar like any proper secret nerd who thinks in python with emotional attatchment and anger issues. also he dyed just the roots of his hair black (LIKE ERYNN AND ATTICUS) and cut it short. and he has a red leather jacket and black ripped jeans and spikey earrings because hes EMO and its NOT A PhASE (the event disappears in a week sorry bestie) (this isnt. intended to poke fun at actual emo people but hes very much pop culture emo not actual subculture emo. he will be proper emo by the time im done w him though.) and siobahnn.. oh siobahnn... most egirl outfit youve ever seen. implied that damien picked it out for her.her hairs pretty much the same style as normal but in braids and shorter... i promise i;ll get more creative with the other ones but i dont want to randomly change her hair texture in between events and its not 4c or anything. the braids are more frayed on the right side and shorter too going to her ears rather than her shoulders on the other side.shes singing on stage in the trained btw. bc. her whole thing is that she WANT to be famous but shes not sure she can mentally deal w it ect vs damiens im not sure i have the talent to get there vs erynns can you two PULL YOUR SHIT TOGETHER PLEASE (im going to have a luft-core event at some point where her shit gets rocked. watch out.) yay and the erynn 3* is her talking to siobahnn about damien and her trained isher on keytar for reasons (she learnt piano alongside atticus learning violin but refuses to do so bc its boring unless a keytar bc thats Fun and Cool) and the len 2* is him holding. a basse guitar. in a shirt with a bass fish on it. yeah. soryr.

AIGHT and here's atticus mixed 1. 4* atticus 4* siobahnn 3* erynn 2* ivy. ik yall dont know who atticus and ivy actually are but theyre besties atticus is erynns twin brother theyre both in the unnamed orchestra. okie dokie lessgo. the plot of the event is very simple:

atticus is a Funny Guy who tells Jokes and Silly Stories including one about erynn falling off the roof

this intruges siobahnn who asks him to elaborate. he gets this paniced look in his eyes and runs away

siobahnn now tracks down anyone who might knwo. first she goes to ivy whos like what the freak i dunno??? =so she goes to erynn which would be the easiest solution in the first place.

erynn says its all atticus's fault and to ask him to admit what he did

siobahnn is IN DEEP now and needs to know

basically long story short atticus locked erynn on the roof and she jumped off to get down (she was fine and thought it was funny but teases him about it to this day)

but i made it an assasin set for no reason. yes i gave atticus a side part. deal with it.theres like a big ass bloddstain on his back and more on his trousers bc its a formal fancy assasion set whereas siobahnn is having funsies stabbing people!! her hair is more. think frye onega grandfest

being dragged back to family matters so i cant elaborate further but yeag!!! THE LITTLE GUYS I LOVE EM... if it feels like siobahnn is my favourite youre wrong i just wanted to doodle her so you get events featuring her. shes also a master at pushing the plot forward but i ahve an event in mind where she breaks bc she cant keep being the only reasonable person and does something really impulsive (challenges the arata-esque guy to a duel) (she looses) (this becomes her crawl green iykwim)

@socks-wizard-money-gang <- if you wanted to read a bunch of bullshit

[bird-of-eternia]

The Journey

Alright, so i spoke of this a little bit in other posts but i'll do a quick (hah!) run through of the journey this far.

**This baby is gonna be long, strap in**

I grew up in the church. My parents started off Pentecostal I believe. i remember people in church speaking in tongues and raising their hands up high. I remember the pastor putting his hands on people and them falling to their knees in passion of God. We went every single Sunday.

As time went by the old pastor passed away and my parents started saying how it wasnt the same. They went less and less talking about how we didnt have the gas or they didnt have any clean church clothes. So as I got older they sorta stopped going to church but held on to that faith hardcore.

They tried out some other ones and even tried our first church after it was upgraded (with a cafe any everything). The music was better apparently and we stayed for awhile but it didnt last.

I always felt like this was the only way. You loved God and went to heaven or you just went to hell. I was constantly anxious that my every move was a sin. My mother once told me "If you think its a sin, it is." you know that saying that goes something like -For your parents its just another Tuesday but for you it was formative-

yeaaaaah

so i was scared of literally everything i thought MIGHT be a sin.

I love my parents and they did the best they knew how but my dad was an alcoholic and my mom struggled with depression. We also were not well off so their was alot of lying. "Dont tell your dad i didnt pay X" or "Dont tell your mom im drinking." and obviously tons of swearing and low key racism and high key homophobia from other relatives. I thought these things were bad=sin but my family loved god and read their bibles and prayed over every meal and before bed so we were okay, right?

Well as i got older being bisexual was a trend (as my mother said) that kids in my highschool were trying out. "Your not a lesbian right?!" Because i didnt want to date my best guy friend. I thought it was kinda scary and kinda gross to be gay but like...they were not necessarily hurting anyone so like...what does it matter?

High school was me trying to mix my belief of the golden rule and kindness with the rhetoric my parents and Christianity were feeding me.

I cried myself to sleep countless nights asking God to please please please let me fall in love first. Let me leave home and have a life before the end came and we all went home to heaven. I didnt realize it at the time but i didnt want to go to heaven. I was terrified of hell but i wanted to live HERE on EARTH and experience life. I didnt want to die. I wrote songs about god so my parents would be proud of me. I tried reading the bible and writing notes in a notebook.

I thought i had a couple divine events in my life. I was weeping and crying before bed (regular routine) and i thought god had sent me a message through the band The Fray as they sang Never say Never. I thought "Okay, i wont let God go. Ill keep trying Lord, i love you, please help me."

Then my cousin had a cancer scare and i literally cleaned out a little space on my closet floor. I put some sort of small wooden table on the floor. Then on top placed my bible, a candle, my bible notebook, and various bits and bobs. I sat down with my lights off and candle lit and prayed. I prayed so hard that i believe this is the very first time i put myself into a meditative/trance state. I was rocking back and forth asking god to save my cousin.

Turns out he didnt have cancer.

Turns out my parents found out what i had done.

Turns out now my gma has lung cancer and wants me to pray for her now.

HEY, HI, THATS ALOT OF WEIRD PRESSURE FOR A LITTLE KID WHOSE QUESTIONING THEIR FAITH?!?!?

so anyway, thanks grandma R.I.P

Turns out praying doesnt always work.

I felt a strange guilt because maybe if i had prayed harder god wouldnt have let grandma die.

I go through the rest of High school in a funk. deeply depressed, moving from house to house. we end up just living in my grandparents old house. I'm truant in school, hardly show up. I begin an alternative school and love it. Through this period i don't think about religion much at all during the day. But i do still cry at night begging for God to wait because my parents and extended family say we are living in end times and itll happen soon.

my best guy friend comes out as gay.

I love him.

my mom says "I love him, you know i do. But hes still going to hell."

I get so scared about not getting into a college that even though i applied to a community college that lets in anybody i get severe neck and shoulder pain from stress. Maybe they'll reject me for some reason? (Looking back i know this was because i was desperate to leave the house. I wanted out so badly. I felt like I didn't fit anymore for some reason. Why was my family making me uncomfortable?)

I get in. in the fall of 2014 I go to my sisters every morning at like 4am so my brother in law can drop me off at school on his way to work.

I meet new people. My sister convinces me to be brave and join a club. I attend anime club ( i know i know....save the comments. I know how it sounds.)

I have a small group of new friends, and a boyfriend (now husband).

I spend every day , all day- from 4am until 6-9pm on campus. I start spending weekends at my boyfriends house. I get a job at school. I get a car.

I start forming my OWN thoughts and feelings about the world.

I meet someone and they make me nervous. They say theyre pagan. That genuinely scared me.

I move in with my boyfriend to be closer to school.

I feel....lighter.

I feel more like myself?

My boyfriend lets me talk about my feelings surrounding religion. He says he loves me no matter if I'm christian or not. He'll go to church with me or he'll support whatever else i choose. I cry.

I've never had the choice before.

We talk about beliefs often.

I make amazing friends who are not christian. who are trans. who are gay. who are atheist, pagan, agnostic.

I begin getting upset when my parents talk about God. "Dont ride his coat tails to hell."- my father talking about my boyfriend. He believes in God but does not agree with the values. He says his father is one of the best people he knows, a man who fought for the people of his country and got kicked out so they had to immigrate to america. If that man, a man who cares so much and fights for people, is going to hell just because he doesnt believe in god....no thanks.

I think about this.

I love my boyfriend with every fiber of my being. I love my friends. They are GOOD people. They try every day to be better and do better.

They're going to hell? but the people who keep pushing hate are going to heaven because they like God?

I'm confused and angry. Maybe i just need to find the right church. a more liberal church. i just believe differently but im still christian.

am i?

I find Aurora Aksnes.

I listen to her music constantly.

I start feeling like maybe there is more out there.

Tarot interests me.

Nature interests me.

symbols and runes interest me.

Could I be a christian witch?

i cry and cry.

am i losing my faith?

I think i like woman.

I think im pansexual.

i cry and cry and cry.

months go by and finally i figure out that...no i'm not christian anymore.

(2016-2017)

but what am i then? what god do i worship now?

I spent so long trying to find a new god to turn my attention to. I begin with Cernunnos and a little bit of Brigid.

i get really into norse stuff.

then i look into irish folkcraft.

then i go back to brigid.

then i decide, if it happens itll happen. i'll just hang with the Earth for now.

Then there were a few years where i went back to brigid and the horned one once in awhile. I took a break for a long time, only dipping my toe back in when the feeling is too much. When the wind blows just right and i just need to light a fucking candle or something lol.

Took some Druidry classes in a phase where i thought maybe that was my path.

Then i landed here. (2024)

I read The Crooked Path by Kelden and felt....inspired.

And so now I'm trying to walk the crooked path in my own time. So much has happened since i started down the witchcraft trail...

i have kids now, i have a full time job, im looking for a house, i need a new car. im having thoughts about my own gender.

So i will walk this crooked path in time. i will walk it and sit down for breaks if i need to. I will listen to the trees and find symbols in their branches. I will be okay.

[omghallucinations]

Your brain is everything 😭 honey i do not understand half of the shit you are saying but you are SAYING it 💅 im new to astrology so forgive me if this is a stupid question or i dont make sense, but i was just looking at my chart and i realized something kind of cool? So hyunjin has a Pisces stellium, and I have a virgo stellium, but get this- he's a Pisces sun Virgo moon, aren't those signs opposite each other's? Aaaand on top of it, I'm a Virgo sun, Pisces moon *jazz hands* theoretically bc obv im never going to meet this man, would that be harmonious? Im not talking about those two ppl dating, but ive just been reading ur analysis for him and it hit so close to home for ME and idk it was really weird and trippy the way it resonated and how connected i felt to his personality. Or like could this explain why i feel such a draw to him? (Not in like a i wanna marry him kind of way, but like in a "the suffering in me feels the suffering in you" kinda way lol) any additional guidance or lessons would be appreciated or you can just skip this ask all together hahha. hope you're doing well 💗!

oh word!! i love this topic. and: yes for sure. imo pisces and virgo are both really karmic signs--pisces is the 12th house, so like the end of a cycle, and virgo is the 6th house, which is like purifying before the next step of life? so they both have that resonance, and often someone with those placements (especially a stellium) has a lot of karmic Stuff going on. i mean everyone does, but i think pisces, virgo and scorpio placements (and 4th/8th/12th house placements) have it on a really personal like "through yourself" level. (aquarius and capricorn and 11th house placements are also super karmic but i see it as more like The Universe works on you/through you more 😩)

and yeah it's common for people to feel a strong connection when their sun and moon reverse match, or even like sun matches their moon by itself! hilariously jisung is also a virgo with a pisces moon so you can look at that relationship--immediate strong feelings (of some kind 😂) that leads to a real emotional understanding or sensitivity. on one level you'll understand each other completely, and on another you deeply will not lmao. there's often some envy or projection mixed in, but more importantly both people can make the other one feel really secure emotionally. and ur lessons and Issues often overlap too. i wouldn’t be surprised if your lunar nodes are similar in some way too (either signs, element, aspect, houses).

like a virgo moon is a real particular placement (my gf has a virgo moon lmao) and that moon is incredibly almost pathologically critical in a way a pisces moon isn't (altho she has her own very Real Struggles, both these moons love to give u depression!!). a virgo sun needs to embody a version of that energy--like, picking out what is actually important, learning to get rid of ego, helping others, doing practical things--so you'll recognize that impulse in someone else’s moon. i feel like especially when your sun is someone else's moon, you can really Key Into that. tho tbh both ways it can be like a laser for REAL.

it’s so interesting!! i feel similarly about ateez wooyoung (my suffering recognises Your Suffering, although we are insanely different people) and i think it’s because we both have a bunch of yods (and quincunx aspects generally) and the yods have tons of planets/houses in common. My Issues recognize Ur Issues in a major way 🫠

[daenystheedreamer]

pls more abt viserys Omaegorverse I'm so fascinated it's insane and i honestly think grrm would b proud

im so happy u love it and this means so much but i do NOT think he would be proud 😭 he would read my posts (gun to his head ofc he wouldnt just. do that.) and sit in silence for a few minutes and then he would say. Maegor isnt gay what are you talking about. and i go well thats not really the point and anyway sexuality is kinda fluid and its more about opportunity and power than about sexual attraction although i will concede- and then he sends elio and linda with spears to hunt me down.

he's canonically a nothing character with personality of 'Beloved Of The Commons' n nothing else so i can kinda do whatever tf i want with him which is fun. he's also mostly there to be a sad wet cat that gets kicked by everyone and everyone he loves dies or is weird about him in some way. he's my special little sad uke twink i brutalise for my personal entertainment <3 im so maegorcoded so tyannacoded... anyway more about my babyboy viserys below<3 warning its SOOO long like fifteen fucking paragraphs Jesus christ

trigger warnings for like everything. incest death depression mental instability murder psychosis uhhh. torture and suicide. just all of it do NOT read unless youre like super certain you wanna read about my deviantart OCs because guys it is NOT worth it

childhood pre-Torture Labyrinth. he's born in 29 AC and was 8-ish when he was at the deathbed of Aegon1. aegon the uncrowned is three years older than him, and rhaena is six years older. jaehaerys is 5 years younger, alysanne is 7 years younger vaella who i kept alive is 10 years younger. just to give an idea of ages and general canon info :>

his only personality trait is Promising and Beloved of the commons. i think him and aegon were friends :) younger brother so he followed after him a lot. slightly scared of rhaena the big cool older sister who has a pet dragon. think his granddad is soooo cool doesnt really think about The Implications of conquest or anything. normal boy normal childhood (as normal as possible when ur siblings are married...) also he is gay because it adds to the horrors later on 🥰

something i think is Inchresting is the rhaena, aegon and viserys are named for rhaenys, aegon and visenya :3 i think viserys is like hercules right where he was named in an attempt to appease The Wife. aenys was like hiiiii auntie/stepmum visenya look i named a kid after you you dont wanna kill me right?right? and she looks at this kid who didnt claim a dragon isnt a girl isnt maegor and goes oh so youre insulting me huh.

i think rhaena aegon viserys had a slightly weird dynamic. rhaena the lesbian getting forcibly betrothed to her younger brother by her father is gonna make things weird, also aegon was 15 and rhaena 18 which adds just the best most awesome sauce to the mix. i think viserys had very complicated feelings on that especially if he is gay cos like... rhaena obviously does not love her brother romantically right. so u are a boy and ur sister is a lesbian but you dont have that word. and you are gay and your brother is cool and the crown prince and everyone is screwing their siblings and that makes your brain chemistry weird. and now your brother is marrying your gay sister. What about you. the dragon has three heads??? idk he's like 12 at this point he just goes back to playing hide and seek with jae+aly.

Uh oh daddy's dead. daddy's dead and uncle maegor is king now with his three wives. Uh oh. oh awesome he's kidnapped you and you're his squire now that's so cool. well its mostly a power play and hes not actually making u do anything as long as you stay locked in the red keep all day he leaves you alone. also maegor's insane girlfriend stares at you like you're a baby lamb that would make a delicious lamb tostada. but hey your big brother aegon has a dragon now and him and rhaena are gonna save you soon. Uh oh aegon's dead. aegon's dead and maegor is king for real for real.

everyone steers clear of you in the keep. you used to play with your siblings and the commoners and you used to play on dragonstone and kings landing and now no one wants to touch you. no one is calling you maegor's squire now, the pretence is gone. you are maegor's hostage. you fantasise about a different outcome, where maegor took you to the battle as his squire, and that you being there might have changed what happened. maybe you could have warned aegon. but you know nothing would have changed. youre not a dragonrider. you're worthless you're powerless. youre 14 years old :)

alys harroway is dead. maegor killed his wife. you knew alys, you saw her around the keep. she seemed very nice. she was very quiet and stayed in her rooms. she was always pregnant. you wonder why she married maegor, why she and tyanna are so strange with each other. you hear rumours. you wish you had talked to her. but she's dead now. maegor killed her. maegor tortured her. she's a whore now. you look out the window and see her rotting leg on a stake outside, her torso on another. you wish you had talked to her.

visenya targaryen the looming shadow over your life, the woman you're named after who looked at you with nothing but scorn, is dead. your mother is gone and she took jae and aly. what about you? what about you? is she not your mother too? are you not her little boy anymore? you are 15 years old. maegor killed alys' family when he was angry with her. is he going to kill you now?

ok second person pov over the gimmick is getting lame. anyway this is where the AU deviates: instead of viserys dying of torture, maegor is like hey maybe my nephew will be more fertile than my BITCH wives. and visenya the blood witch before her death compiled a bunch of old valyrian a/b/o fanfiction and said son if you ever find yourself with infertile wives. Consult These Texts. then tyanna and maegor made viserys mpreggable i dont care about how or like. what his body looks like. im not into the fetish of omegaverse LMAO i dont want to think about the fertilisation or birthing process or what organs he has thats unnecessary. only thing thats important is viserys can incubate babies and they are birthed via c-section :3

quick lore dump: vis is forced to maegor -> rhaena crashes the wedding but vis is so broken at this point he just doesnt want anyone else to die and has resigned himself to maegor so rhaena reluctantly surrenders -> alyssa jae and aly DO go to the red keep after they find out about the wedding and jae dies fighting maegor which makes viserys fully break -> alyssa now has husband dead 2 kids dead her son is queen and she also loses her fight :( lives on dragonstone with alive vaella -> alysanne is given to the faith -> rhaena agrees to a truce and she is hand of the king now and viserys' main protector -> vis gets pregnant and the kid is basically a reincarnation of jaehaerys -> tyanna loses her shit and tries to murder/sterilise/whatever viserys so maegor kills her cos he's finally got his babymaker -> vis has a daughter who's the reincarnation of tyanna -> faith uprising, shut down -> vis has his second daughter final child daenys who's birth is heralded by the martyrdom of poxy jeyne poor in the quashed faith uprising

vis is in the torture labyrinth for a couple decades. life sucks husband sucks everyone is weird about him. very death in venice people are weird about the boy type deal. has to wade through gender and sexuality politics of westeros which means several men going utterly insane about him including a couple kingsguard knights (celibate hypermasculine freaks bound to be insane sexually). one point early-ish on he DOES start believing this one kingsguard knight will save him from The Hells The Horrors but maegor finds out and kills that guy adn sexually humiliates viserys in front of the kingsguard and makes their son watch. So that fucks up vis' psyche for a while :3

rhaena and alysanne try to convince him to rebel and run away that they will use their dragons and fight. but maegor has made vis so paranoid and crazy he thinks maegor knows everything knows all his thoughts so he's terrified of plotting escape cos he thinks maegor will kill everyone. plus maegor made sure to force kids onto him early so that vis wouldnt be able to leave :3 world's most evil babytrap of all time.

vis doesnt interact with anyone except rhaena aly maegor his kids and the kingsguard so yeah its bad for him. ceryse hangs around for a while but shes like yeah i dont want any part of this shit dude being queen is NAWT worth it and she goes back to the hightower to plot marrying her niece off to maegor's son.

also there's a curse on the kingsguard all of them die really horribly and early. its a fun little thing for me personally because in f&b maegor's kinsguard is cartoonishly bad and jae's is cartoonishly perfect so i though Hey what if we did a little curse on the kingsguard ey. that would be fun. the only guy who stays long is a bracken because brackenfail cancels out knightfail. he's all godly and pissy about the gay marriage thing but he's also a monarchist so even though he think maegor is satan he's like well. he is my king i must serve him i obey my vows. he thinks viserys is a freak of nature but slowly grows to respect him and helps kill maegor + takes the fall for it. they have a weird father figure/white knight/weird tension thing that never gets consummated yay ^_^ the maegor torture labyrinth will have you 21 years old and best friends with a 50 year old celibate knight like dang where tf ser bracken at today 🥹

viserys snaps in 66AC with no like big catalyst or anything. he just has a good day where he's mostly lucid and he's angry and he's tired of everything and he's sick of maegor and he wants freedom he wants to be free. he wants to breath the air without panicking that maegor is going to hurt him. and maegor says some disgusting comment to him while theyre alone in the throne room and vis just snaps and start fighting him. daenys shows up cos she had her own Visions and Voices and they just start whaling on him. bracken knight helps too he takes most of maegor's counter attacks his organs are all over the floor but maegor dies impaled on the throne YAY

vis is like. A bit better for a while. his son is now king and vis is seeing that oh it doesnt get better does it people will still die. also his son jae has this weird oedipus complex about him thanks to maegor's insane parenting and viserys is fully aware of that so its not fun times for him. jae and daenys try to make him better try to invent therapy but its the middle ages they dont have that yet. they finally send him off to harrenhal (BAD IDEA) because they think viserra (the elder daughter btw, the tyanna one) might be able to cure him with her weird witchcraft. they think she's insane too but its the last option... viserra thinks vis is lame and weak but she does love him in ehr own way or maybe just pities him. anyway she does her best and it works for a while but viserys sorta gives up cos the depression is too much. and viserra believes in euthanasia as a mercy and thinks this is best for him this will let him be at peace. daenys has a premonition about it and tries to stop him. she has a big blowout fight with jae about it too and curses his bloodline and prophesises the long night. burned the red keep a little bit, you know how it is.

blah blah blah anyway daenys and vis end up dying in the gods eye together in a murder/suicide suicide/suicide murder/murder whatever. viserra has the lake dragged and they're found holding each other like a mother and her fetus :3

Fucks sake this post is long. holy shit holy fuck. my fucking bad guys my bad im so sorry. Holy shit. anyway thats my deviant art oc tee hee ^_^

[mamamittens]

I was getting a little frustrated with myself for not just hammering out the next Spooktober fic before the workweek and wondered if I was going to do the same thing to myself for Christmas/Winter season.

Mainly giving myself deadlines for writing when it kinda requires my Utmost Focus Only On Words And Maybe Lofi Mix, which is great when im in the Zone but not so much when I get that... Weird squirmy feeling where I wanna do some unspecified Other Activity.

It's dumb. I do these events cause I love it but it's like the dog meme of "No Write! Only Fic!" And unfortunately I don't have boundless time during the week to Get Shit Done.

Anyway, I was thinking of what I'm going to do for Christmas season since I know it'll be so much worse at work lmao. And how I could instead do pinups again. Those are fun. Maybe write fics if I'm feeling it. And I had...

An idea.

For Christmas.

In October.

(please don't kill me lmao, I don't know why I'm like this either)

But! Basically! It's Izou and Thatch (separately) having lost the Spirit of Christmas and Togetherness. They both keep skipping out at spending the holidays with family and each other because they're super busy and mutually pissy about it (hence why they've been On Break).

Anyway, both of them end up setting up sad little trees cause they're sappy dumbasses too prideful to admit they were wrong (for separate but similar reasons) and find that, suddenly, there's an angel topper on them? That they didn't buy themselves?

It'll be hard to bounce between them so maybe they share a place but keep "giving the other distance" or whatever.

Anyway, this angel topper is pretty fancy and cute so they mostly just think it's weird.

Until Hallmark Bullshit Shenanigans ensue and the damn thing comes to life to bully them into fixing their personal issues before Christmas.

Nikia is like, a very low-key guardian angel of the season meant to bring back the spirit of the holiday in those that need it but aren't like, Scrooge or whatever and require three whole ass ghosts.

Anyway, neither one realizes the other sees her as she goes about her bullshit until near the end. It's very Shenanigans and shit as she pulls their heads out of their asses in time to spend the holiday together with family.

Mayhaps, after they've learned their lessons, she disappears and they're super depressed about it. Until they spot her (not as an angel, maybe it's a part-time gig lmao) and collectively decide they could hardly let HER spend the holiday alone either!

Super cheesy Hallmark Fluff.

Anyway, it sounds like a nice thing to brighten up what I KNOW will be a gruelling holiday season since I work online retail.

Hopefully I get my shit together and smash out those fics before I wind up doing them in November or all in one week (which I nearly did last year but it was literally Get home->write->eat->shower-> bed with no break)

Yeah.

I... Really do this to myself lol, but it's better this year cause I'm not doing 13! So there's that! And so far the reception has been great so it's not like I'm doing a little solo party for no one! Here's to hoping the rest of the fics hit well too!

[freakywizard]

hiii r&m anon here again!!! i noticed you mentioned liking season 7, so i was wondering if you had any favorite or least favourite episodes, plotlines, all that jazz. season 7 debrief, if you will. would love to hear your thoughts!

ram anon gracing my inbox once again (always a pleasure)

huge rant below the cut (talking about rick and morty triggers the longwinded newspaper art critic in me sorry)

s7e2 and e4 were the best episodes in my opinion. absurd, darkly funny, overall just so perfect. i was especially excited about s7e2 since the rick/jerry dynamic has intrigued me since episode s3e5. i love that that episode basically just confirmed Rick and Jerry may be foils but are also perfect complements? they can only understand / appreciate each other when they are literally existing in each other's flesh? i try not to wax poetic about ram but this episode was tempting meeeee

and re: e4, i think this show's writing is at its best when the writers come up with a stupid concept and treat it seriously. i love that this episode saw the concept of 'what if corpse spaghetti' through to the end. classic dark comedy, absurd, wacky goodness. lovee it

one thing i do hate about this season (as well as seasons 5 and 6) is the number of callbacks to 'old' rick and morty. s7e3 and s7e8 were some of the worst episodes this season, mostly because they just reused old plotlines and developed them in the least interesting ways possible, imo. did the mid gag from s3e5 really need its own episode? it really did not. i think that this is one of the worst consequences of the show becoming less episodic and more serialized - the writers just endlessly milk the early seasons to recycle into plotlines, one-off gags, whatever. the self-referentiality and meta humor of newer seasons will always, always grind my gears severely.

also, s7e7 was almost unwatchable. it reminded me of s6e2 in all the worst ways - just dedicating an entire episode to a SINGLE movie reference, doubling down on the singular reference as the episode drags on. god that episode sucked. so boring, annoying, unfunny.

i have extremely mixed feelings on s7e5. On the one hand, I'm still annoyed that the backstory from s3e1 is even canon, and Rick is yet another entry in the long tradition of flawed male protagonists turned into a nihilistic depressed shitshow by the death of a wife. it's such a pat trope, imo.

HOWEVER, i really like how this episode developed Rick. I'll always be a fan of ruthlessness and revenge plotlines, so im biased. but i've come to appreciate Rick Prime as a villain, as a testament to how much Rick hates himself -- there's a version of himself out there that would torture himself across the universe by killing off his own loved ones, just to try to prove his own superiority? it's all very mindfucky but im super into it. Rick C137 killing Prime with his fists, all while Prime goads him? it was such a cool scene. i love when the show does selfcest

i also still have mixed feelings on the evil morty and his growing prominence in the series. it was nice when he was just a little treat, but it became clear in s4 the writers were aware of fan expectations for the character. i can't help but wonder if that's shaped the way they're writing him, especially giving him the centralized role in the story of possible-future-final-antagonist? that being said i've always liked evil morty, he's a fun character to watch on screen. although i'm extremely cautious of my enjoyment. he's already starting to feel like a fanfic rip-off of himself a little bit (that one line where he said 'well, they don't call me good morty' was so bizarre. evil morty was the fandom name for him, and the writers adopted it and made it a diegetic epithet for the character???????)

s7e10 was refreshing after a long season of Morty getting sidelined. I love how this one starts with a classic rick and morty set-up (what if *weird thing* in *random place*) but turns it into existential horror? really cool. i don't think it was the most subtle way to do morty character development, but it was interesting enough that i was invested. also, rick pinning morty's picture to the pinboard. so good

overall my reaction to this season is 'we're so back.' it was LEAGUES better than s5-6, which i think are like the ram dark ages. i don't think s7 was the best season yet (as some are suggesting) but I think that this season marks a positive turn for the quality of writing in the show.!!

here's my episode ranking in ( i mostly did this for fun)

E2

E5

E4

E10

E6

E1

E3

E9

E7

E8

Basically, e7 and e8 were irredeemably terrible. e9, e3, and e1 were mid/fine. e6, e10, e4, e5, and e2 were all varying degrees of peak rick and morty.

other mics. thoughts:

i felt like there was a lot of long, no dialogue, sad music montages that felt like references to the famous scene from s4e8? the one from s7e4 comes to mind immediately. but there were another few sprinkled in

s7e3 rick telling a scientologist "worship how you want" ??? he would not say that. who let that slide in the writing room?

the fight scenes and gore were all really well animated!! since s3 the animation has only gotten better and i love the gore

i actually love the new VAs. they're different from roiland, obviously, but i honestly think they're both doing a better job. the performances are more naturalistic, and less grating? i thought the change would weird me out, but it's subtle, and i like it

Rick canonically bad at eating pussy in his youth

[sweetsparadise]

about that ask thats like 'u post lolis!!!'

i think people fail to realize moe entirely as a genre and style is lolicon and its like getting angry at meat in a kfc. they are infact the intrusion getting into something now that is cool and then getting angry at things there since day 1 . pre covid anime community i miss you so much!!!

ur so right cuz im literally jst squeeing over cute moe girls like the rest of thm!!! i jst happen to call loli characters lolis, bc they literally are n theres nothing wrong OR inherently sexual with loli character design!!! u guys literally LIKE IT!!! theyll like it n say "aw wish this wasnt pedobait" like... bro ur literally telling on urself, to like the art, n then imply the art is meant to appeal to pedos...??? im not attracted to thm (or much of anything for that matter cuz this troublesome thing called depression) or attracted to ero chibi art i just.... like them ;_; with junko mizunos art for example, it doesnt come off as something ur meant to get off too despite featuring lotsa titties. i just love an artful mix of ero n kawaii!!!!! like when dudes had pinup posters, u think theyd get a boner looking at em everytime? that they put em up to get off to? no!! pinup is more overtly sexual n even then its main purpose is to be ART appreciating the beauty of the feminine form!!!

so heres my philosophy on erokawa. FIRSTLY the "ero" doesnt have the typical english meaning in the sense that it is MEANT to arouse, just that it involves sexuality or nudity, basically. heres some examples of what i consider n enjoy as erokawa/erochibi (under the read more to be considerate of minors or those who jst dont care to see, but its pretty much only implied nudity)

these characters have no age in my mind (the artist usually doesnt have one in mind either) it doesnt even cross it, ESPECIALLY FOR CHIBIS. i do not think abt the age of a subject unless the artist clearly wants u to. u cld have a chibi grandma n still have ppl calling it a child bc they are so uninformed abt chibi n what it is. they are not even human to me (its literally refered to as super deformation, basically as inhuman n unrealistic as possible) some ppl treat literal drawings as things with agency n act as if they have feelings n thats jst incredibly weird to me, but its fine to be that way as long as u arent imposing it on other ppl. if only we cld all jst live in peace o(╥﹏╥)o

also, this is a long ass post already but i have more to say on ppls hypocrisy. if ur gonna block me for liking erokawa, go ahead n block sanrio too!!! theyve done SOOO many collaborations with artists who then go right back to drawing erokawa, straight up pinup or even hentai (ie their super sonico collab) as well as slightly sexualizing their own characters even. i have pleeeeeenty of evidence of this if anyones intrested lol. i actually have like, at least 5 officially liscensed n approved sanrio drawings embracing panty shots x3 ...anyway thanks to anyone for actually reading this, especially if it makes u reconsider the way u view some things :3 i hope ppl will understand my perspective, but the most i can ask for is that ppl stop accusing me of disgusting things ( ;´ - `;)

[the-s1lly-corner]

Does Jeff ever miss his little brother? Does he know he's alive?? And how would he react to seeing his baby brother?

not going to structure this like my normal posts since this might be more rambly but but!!

tackling the first question first: my personal interpretation of jeff is still standard to what you would expect from many other interpretations (at least.... i think so... i must admit i havent interacted much with the fandom since the 2010s sooooo... not sure if it stills holds to any present day hcs!)... you know, arrogant immature and full of himself, just about still as unhinged as before... but i like to think that every now and then he has moments where hes just. normal. well not normal normal, definitely not going to get there anytime soon especially given that in my au hes on the run and bouncing around. cant really receive any mental help when youre hiding from authorities.. getting back to the topic, these moments are few and far between and its in a weird way, him reminiscing on how things used to be. i fully blame this on a fic i read in middle school, that literally shifted how i view some crp characters (shrugs)... but yes, i think in those moments he would miss him. a lot. those small pockets generating enough guilt to get him to slow down and think over everything that's happened since then. i think it would send him in a short little moment of depression, actually. at least as long as hes alone and by himself where hes left with his thoughts. again, these moments dont come often nor do they last for long. slaps that man with mental clarity

second question! at least within the context of my hcs and au! i dont think he would know unless he stumbled upon him! though imma be real ive considered making liu... dead in my au since i never got into his lore and stuff but who knows.. maybe hes out there doing his own thing while jeffs over here doing his own stuff.. but as far as jeff is aware, liu is deceased

third question: i think it would be a mix of emotions! i think it fully depends on jeffs current mental state that will determine his reaction. theres so many factors that can go into this too; is liu trying to get revenge? was jeff going to kill him before realizing who he was chasing? do they just casually run into one another? loads of possible scenarios, really! but as i said, i never got too into lius lore so im unsure which is most in character for him. i feel if jeff is having one of his moments mentioned above i think he might try to apologize and make it up to his brother... might be totally crushed when he receives no forgiveness (rightfully, in my opinion).. or maybe he'll try to act buddy buddy with his brother, like nothings changed (i can see this being more likely when jeff is just. being jeff).. though i dont think any real connection can be made between these two anymore... though reading through lius wiki, its said somewhere that liu forgives him.. so maybe theres an understanding between the two, but still no connection. peaceful parting, you know? many ideas many thoughts, im just unqualified to build on them at the moment due to not knowing much of liu

[tactician]

OCS + Associations

thank you bree @sangre for the tag :3 hugging hugging hugging

im gonna do this for reides, my dnd oc!

animal

seahorses! symbolically, they are linked to balance and adaptability, which i see a lot with reides in regards to how he navigates both the lands and seas. they're also associated with freedom and creativity, which are major themes to reides' character as a whole. plus they're so cute and reides is cute, too. teehee.

colors

blues, silvers, light purples! and, of course, green... his older brother calls him seaweed-head, so there's gotta be a green association in there... DFJKDJG

month

january! the first month of the year; cold, but in a renewing and refreshing sort of way. a new beginning!!! a new experience!!! and so many new possibilities existing in front of you!!! the level of expectations placed on january also aligns with the sort of burdens that reides had placed on him as well.

songs

chasing kites - ​iamamiwhoami! over the ocean outcast, with nowhere to go / a brighter forecast, new winds will blow / the storm that's drawing near / it calms and the air is cleared. i have a huge playlist for reides which can be found here too.

number

16! he was born on firstlight 16 so that might be where i get that association from lmao.

plants

lotus flowers! i think lotus flowers really suit reides. even the way that they grow - rising out of water to bloom; existing in that beautiful margin between the aquatic and the earthen - is so... him. they also symbolize rebirth, which i think is very much aligned with the sort of stuff that reides went through when he initially ventured to the surface world (and kind of ties into the stuff i talked about for the month portion of this too!)

smells

i'm aware that it's a slight cop-out to say the ocean, but, like, heres the thing: the ocean! LMAO. that salty sort of kick is super reides; the scent of the sea at dawn, that crispness, not dainty or elegant but effortlessly evocative... yeah. that's reides. he usually smells like that naturally. like the sea, plain soap, and ink.

gemstones

larimar, pietersite and pearls as well! also, i know they're not gems per se, but i also associate sea glass with reides a whole lot. they're gems to ME!!!

time of day

dawn! the very moment that the sun starts rising; when stars and maybe even the moon are still visible in the sky. as you can see, i really like associating reides with existing in between or on the border of various things fdkjdljg. i also think reides stays up really late typically so he's no stranger to being awake at this time LMAO

season

winter! ok im a little weird with this one so bear with me...... i really enjoy associating reides with coldness since he's such a sweet, passionate person and i like the idea of his optimism existing alongside the cold; i like the idea of the cold being a comfort instead of depressing or stoic or serious. bc for reides, the cold IS a comfort!!!! it gives him clarity and energizes him. it reminds him of his home seas and it empowers him.

places

on the beach, skipping alongside the waves; laughing, with a book clutched to his side; fingers stained with ink and hair windswept from the briny breeze!

foods

oysters, mussels, all of that sort of thing - juicy seafood that tastes best when you eat it with your bare hands. salty, rich flavours!

drinks

a nice rum with lime mixed in... that's reides right there. blue daiquiris are these things and also, as the name suggests, blue - and that's fun and would delight reides, so i think if he was a cocktail he'd be that. as for his taste in drinks... reides loves sweet ones the very most - rip currant wine from his home seas is his fav - but he has a soft spot for firewhiskey, too!

element

WATER, BABY!!!!!!! i dont think lightning technically counts as an element but that as well!

seasoning

SEA SALT, BABY!!!!!!!

sky

i think this ties into the time of day prompty really well so i'm pointing up there again hehe.

weather

stormy weather! >:) he is the storm prince, after all... for all his kindness, he is tumultuous and brings change. there's a lot of power to be found in storms, and that power is something that reides is learning to embrace. when he hatched, it was during a crazy storm that really wracked his home seas - and, sometimes, the people there maintain a superstition that baby-reides actually absorbed that storm's power. it's simply wack poetry stuff (that, frankly, used to freak reides out as a kid lmao) but what if they're right. what then.

magical powers

reides is a wizard who specializes in evocation magic, so you know he loves to harness da power of da elements... he especially loves ice and lightning magic. again, if something sounds stormy, he is probably tapping into that power and trying his best to let it surge through him.

weapons

reides' weapon is... the power he extracts from the weave teehee. he has a purple conch shell from home that serves as his arcane focus for all that! but, his magic aside, reides also has a dagger that was fashioned from the pelagic ore of his home seas and a crossbow that he named 'harpoon.'

candy

it's gotta be salt water taffy! reides' fav candy as well as the candy that embodies his nature the absolute best :3

methods of long-distance travel

reides loves boats so much. big ships fascinate him endlessly. he wants to go on them all the time. he fantasizes about being at sea with aske (his boyfriend who is also a sailor / fisherman) all the time.

fear

to let down his people and be an outcast amongst them; to prove that all the people who pelted him with insults were right; to lose his home; to lose his freedom

mythological creature

merfolk is a laughably easy answer I KNOWWW so i will choose something else even if they're by far the first thing my mind leaps to for reidesy DFLDKGDKFH i think selkies are cool too given the nature of their shapechanging o: reides' identity both above and below the seas is something that is fun with me thematically and i think selkies kind of offer a physical representation of that

piece of stationary

a page of a sturdy tome that has notes written all over it!!! and doodles!!! and some of the ink on it has been smudged too!!! yay research!!!

three emojis

🌊⛈️✨

celestial body

reides is definitely a star! shining resolutely through the darkness of night... ✰ i also associate him with the star tarot, so that ties in nicely.

[angelicdonuts]

what was your first ps oc? what was their personality/design like?

(oh my god it's been my THIRD TIME having to rewrite ALL of this because I keep accidentally wiping it..BUT IM NO QUITTER!!! And 3rd times a charm!! :3)

THANK YOU SOOOO MUCH FOR ASKING THIS!! (feels silly having to type that for the 3rd time lol!)

After thinking through and having to write this multiple times now, I've come to the conclusion that my first Pico's School oc actually started out as just a concept, then became a fully fledged oc only after I already made a few others, but I think the title still goes to them!

As a concept, they were a spiteful ghost. Not sure why, where they came from, nor did I ever decide literally anything else about them. Their whole thing was that they were this spiteful ghost who was also kinda silly? All I really remember was that they liked messing with Pico and enjoyed the thought of everyone in the world meeting a horrible end? Strange, I know. But don't worry, it gets worse, LMAO!!

When I brought up the idea to my best friend and got a mixed review, I immediately dropped them out of embarrassment, just to bring them back to add something to another PS oc of mine who I made with a whole batch of them (All of which I still have and TREASURE because they all mean so much to me)

Their name is Noah, and their whole character (at least at the time since they're DRASTICALLY different now) was that they were super shy, EXTREMELY timid, and depressed. (And also dinosaurs!!) And remember the first oc I mentioned? Well, their name is now Glass, thanks to the same best friend, and their whole existence revolves around making Noah's life a living hell.

The whole story behind the two was that Noah got bullied when they were younger and obviously at a different school and got forced to go into the boiler room that was rumored to be haunted?? Henceforth, Noah got semi-possessed by Glass.

Nearly everything about Glass revolves around Noah, so it's a little hard to explain them by themself, but there are a few things about them that are particularly interesting.

Their silliness and spitefullness are now split into two completely different personalities, but both with the ultimate goal of getting Noah to 'self-destruct' (I swear its for a reason but GOD that sounds so bad to the point its funny) The spiteful side did so by telling them horrible things and just making Noah hate themself in general. The silly side did so by making sure that any peace Noah ever found never lasted by being atrociously annoying.

Also they shapeshift, because they can. And that's cool. So yeah!

They don't have an exact story behind why they are the way they are. They've gone from 'kid who got murdered' to 'ghost with no chill' to 'weird other dimensional being that wants humanity dead' to 'demon who wants to wreak havoc on mankind'.

And as of now, I don't know what to do with Glass, both in terms of character and appearance wise, since I really haven't worked on them whatsoever for what feels like years, and like I said I completely reworked Noah, character and all, and their entire existence revolves around them, so I think it's only right that I completely rework them and maybe even finally give them a solid backstory and character.

As for what they look like actually isn't too hard even if they do shapeshift since I gave them this sort of 'normal' or 'standard' form, which itself has two different versions depending on which personality is talking. Heres my most recent take on what they look(ed?) like (and I mean recent as in literally right now LOL):

I think it's obvious on its own but left side is 'meanie' right side is 'silly'

The pictures around the edge are OLD OOOLD doodles I've made of them (some of them have Noah's old designs in them too :3), but basically 'meanie' is pretty boring, but they do literally all of the shapeshifting, meanwhile 'silly' is ribbon-like? And they have a mouth and arms. Smaller differences are the cowlicks and whatever the hell you call that strand of hair in the middle of their face

Anywaysss! I could talk all about Noah and literally EVERYTHING about them, but that's probably for another time considering how long this already is!