#a strained relationship this is just to say n
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I'm curious how do you think Quinn would handle a breakup? Maybe one where he's being broken up with?
Boy, was this one hard to write... 90% of this is based on my last breakup, so... it's pretty... painful. SO ENJOY my misery! (I gave you a better ending than I had IRL, so you're welcome for that at least.)
"I loved you, I really did."
"It doesn't have to be this way," Quinn begged. "I still love you, Y|N."
"But you don't show it, Quinn. I've been so alone for so long and I just can't put myself through this anymore." Tears had been streaming down your face for several minutes now, since this whole spiraling conversation had started, yet you never broke eye contact with him. You wanted him to know how much this was hurting you to say and just how long you had been carrying the weight of it all.
"I tried to tell myself it would pass. It was this excuse, and that excuse, but nothing ever changed. I just don't think you can handle a relationship and your career right now. I'm tired of lying to myself. I'm tired of acting like tomorrow will magically be better. It's never better."
"Y|N I'm sorry--"
"I'm sure you are, and so am I, but I can't do this anymore. I just can't."
Quinn said nothing, his eyes dropped from your face while he stood there looking completely lost.
"You always say I don't deserve to feel the way I do when I'm down, because you've caused me to feel that way, but that's as far as it goes. Nothing ever changes. It's the same stuff over and over."
"I know, that's on me," he choked out, throat tight with anxiety. "I never intended to hurt you. I didn't think things were as bad as they were. I didn't realize I was hurting you."
You just shook your head in disbelief at hearing him say he hadn't noticed what he was doing to you. "You know, maybe I just asked too much from you. Maybe I demanded too much and you had no choice but to push back. I just don't know."
Quinn's eyes flick back to you immediately, "You were never too much, and I meant that every time I told you -- every time I tried to reassure you. You have always been there for me."
"And what about you? Where were you when I needed you the most? Distant, closed off, out with the guys? Even when you were beside me, you weren't really there. I begged you to do stuff with me and you'd say sure, but something would always come up. It was like you wanted an excuse to be away from me. I understood in the beginning, but fuck! I wouldn't hear from you until the next day. 'Sorry, I fell asleep. I left my phone at the hotel.' How could I not be suspicious?"
"I never cheated on you!" Quinn cried out.
"But, Quinn, the goddamn panic attacks you caused me! That hurt me!" Your voice was so much louder now, straining to remain below a yell. He was a blur in your eyes, with the tears obstructing your vision. "I begged you for the smallest of things! Christ, I'd say, 'good night, I love', and it was like you'd just ignore what I said. You never said anything the next morning! You say you love me, but you're horrible at showing it."
Quinn's voice, on the other hand, was growing smaller each time he had to plead his case. "I never fell out of love with you, Y|N, it's just like we drifted apart. I love how you treat me. I just wasn't used to being treated that way. I'm sorry if it came off like I was pushing you away."
"It was months though, Quinn. Months of feeling like I was the third wheel or just another friend. I don't like feeling so alone in a relationship. It's horrible."
"I don't know what else to say, but I'm sorry. Can I do anything to make this better?"
You were biting your bottom lip so hard when you heard his half-assed apology you tasted blood shortly after. "No, I don't think so. Too much has happened. I never thought we'd come to this. I thought you were going to be the last guy I had to open up to; the last guy I'd have to explain my past to. I wanted you to be my last, Quinn."
"I know, and I'm sorry I hurt you like this. I just got too comfortable and never checked in with how you were feeling. It was selfish of me. I'm not proud of any of this."
"I'm sorry it had to be this way, too. Sorry I had to bring this up out of the blue, but I've just reached my breaking point one too many times."
Even through all of your anger and sadness, you wanted to walk over to him and give him one last hug, but you had to stand your ground or all of these revelations would be for nothing. Too many times before you had talked yourself out of telling him how you had felt, but there would be no going backwards now.
"I've got to put myself first for one," you finally brought yourself to say. "I'll get my stuff out of here while you're on the road."
"Y|N--," he mumbled, his eyes so sorrowful hearing you say your goodbyes, so finite and decided.
"I hope everything works out for you, Quinn. I really do. I hope you find the person that's right for you. Someone who can handle your life and schedule. Again, I'm sorry but that doesn't appear to be me."
That was it. You had said everything you had argued with yourself over for months, in a matter of minutes, and now you were leaving his apartment. You'd linger on your decision for a moment once the door closed behind you, but you had to force yourself to go forward though your heart was begging you to go back.
On the other side of the door, you wouldn't hear him finally break down; his cries unheard and his heart shattered.
You'd reach the parking garage and get in your car but you didn't leave immediately -- almost like you were wanting to see if Quinn was just behind you, but the elevator door never opened. It was for the best. What would you have done if he had? Run back over to him? Say you were sorry? It was best not to think about the what-ifs.
It would hit you, as you rolled onto the street, that the next time you returned it would be to get your things, and likely the last time you'd ever be at his apartment. That apartment held so many memories, both good and bad. It felt more like home than your own did.
You'd find yourself in a silent argument the whole drive home until one song, on your shuffled playlist, catches your ear. It was Venice Bitch, by Lana del Rey, a song you loved until, for the first time, you noticed how much it aligned with your emotions.
"Fresh out of fucks forever, trying to be stronger for you. Ice cream, ice queen... oh god, miss you on my lips. It's me, your little Venice bitch...on the stoop with the neighborhood kids, calling out bang-bang kiss-kiss...and as the summer fades away, nothing cold can stay...you're right, I told you we'd make it work, you're beautiful and I'm insane...we're American made...give me Hallmark: one dream, one life, one lover...paint me happy and blue."
The music swells, as your tears run off your jawline. You loved Quinn so much! He had been the prince you had dreamed of, wished for and what had you done?
"Oh god, love him on my lips...touch me with your fingertips...it's me your little Venice bitch."
You'd pull in your driveway, your forehead resting against the steering wheel while you screamed out in agony at your broken heart. Your body hurt from crying for so long, throat sore from such loud emotions, and chest heavy with anxiety. Eventually, you'd exit your car and drag yourself to your front door. You couldn't just crawl into bed after all of that, you would need help in crying yourself to sleep. So, in the kitchen, you'd go through two glasses of wine while you convinced yourself you were such an idiot. Realizing you had thrown away the best thing to ever happen to you, you would being crying to loudly, it was like you were screaming. It was any wonder you hadn't awoken your sleeping neighbors next door. There was no fixing this now. What was done, was done.
All you wanted was some comfort but there would be no one to give you any. Not now. You felt you didn't deserve it anyway.
Leaving the glass and open bottle on the island, you forced yourself to the bathroom to wash your face. Seeing yourself in the mirror --how broken you looked-- had you been any weaker, you would have thrown something at it to erase the image from your mind. If only it would have been that easy to erase Quinn's sad eyes pleading for you not to leave. You wish you would have just left the light off.
In your bedroom, either out of habit or for comfort you grabbed a shirt to sleep in, which had been one of Quinn's. It hadn't taken long for the slight buzz to affect you but you felt no lighter or less phased by your actions. You wondered if you ever would.
As you figured you would, you'd cry into your pillow until flat exhaustion would pull you into sleep. That was until the buzzing of your phone would wake you from the light slumber. On the screen, "Huggy Bear" illuminated the room in bold, white letters. You ended the call, but no sooner had the phone screen gone black, it was flashing again. Like the first one, you swiped the red button and the ringing finally ceased. The next time the phone would buzz would be from a text notification. The words would send butterflies pulling your heart in one hundred different directions.
"I'm outside. Please, may I talk to you?"
Torn between leaving him out there in the cold, and actually giving him a moment to say what he needed to, you laid there for a few minutes before throwing the blankets aside and stumbling down the hall to the living room. Wiping your cheeks, you unlocked the door to find him standing there, his hoodie pulled up around his messy curls and his eyes bloodshot and wet.
You lean against the doorframe for support; arms crossed in an attempt to hide your deeper emotions.
"Y|N, I don't want things to be this way. I don't want things to end like this."
It was so hard, but you stood your ground, no matter how hard you wanted to fall into his body and tell him you were sorry.
"I'll try harder. I shouldn't have taken you for granted like I did."
Finally, you say something to him with a slight shaking of your head," This wasn't all on you. I asked too much. I'm sorry."
Your stifled cries can't be held back for long, and shortly after apologizing, you cover your face with your hands to hide your crying. Your whimpers stab Quinn in the heart all over again, still feeling he's the sole reason you're feeling this way. He steps forward, and wraps his arms around you. He's so warm against the cold night air, which causes your nails to dig into his back, allowing yourself to return his embrace.
"I'm so sorry! I'm so, so sorry!" You cried out, holding on to him like a lifeline.
"So am I," Quinn whispered in to your ear, trying to keep you from a panic attack. "C'mon, let's get you back inside. Is that okay?"
You'd allow him to guide you back into the warmth of the your house. He would be the one to shut and lock the door, and through all of that, he'd still keep you pressed against his chest.
"I never wanted to make you cry," he confessed, never realizing how much he could miss the feeling of you in his arms.
"I can't believe I hurt you like that, Quinn," you replied, hiding your face from his.
"Don't apologize, please." he said, nearly on the brink of tears himself. "I'm sorry I hurt you so much that we even got to this point in the first place."
The fact that he had even wanted to see you, to drive outside of the city to get to you, and above all else, not telling you how much of a horrible person you had been, spoke volumes of Quinn's willingness to be better for you. He wrapped both arms around you tighter than he ever had before. You were shivering, wearing nothing but that oversized t-shirt, but you didn't care; being cold wasn't going to take away whatever this moment was with Quinn.
"Are you okay?" He asked, running a hand up and down your spine. "You're shaking."
"I don't know."
"Come on, pretty girl, let's get you back to bed, hm? If you'll let me."
You nod, but were still reluctant to let go of him. Now you were forced to face him and it felt terrible to still see him looking so heartbroken. His cheeks were still wet with fresh tears, as he had apparently been silently crying while he had been holding you. You touched his face and his eyes closed against your touch.
"I'm sorry."
His eyes would open again, and he would try to smile for you. "I'm sorry, too."
Without another world, Quinn would guide you back down the hall to your bedroom, rather familiar with where everything was in the house. The light was off, your phone lay in the middle of the bed with the screen on. Your wallpaper was a picture of Quinn and yourself at last year's Stanley Cup playoffs, and it was the only light in the room. Quinn would click on one of the bedside lamps before reaching for your phone.
"I always loved that photo," he said, lingering on the photo for a moment before shutting off the screen and laying it next to the lamp.
You'd crawl into the bed and he would move to tuck you in, "I don't want you to hate me, Quinn."
He'd stop moving to return his eyes to your face. "I don't, sweetheart. I don't think I could...ever. It hasn't crossed my mind."
"But--"
"I'm not upset with you, baby. This is on me. What you said was true: I should have paid more attention.
You gasped through the beginnings of another crying fit, "I don't deserve it!"
"Shh, shh," Quinn leaned forward to cradle your face with his hand. "I needed to hear it, baby. The truth hurts sometimes. I'll be okay once you are."
"Will you-- will you stay tonight?" You asked, terrified he could possibly deny your request, trying to stop crying.
"Of course," he managed to actually smile. "I'd love to."
"Quinn, I'm so--"
"It's okay, it's okay. We've both said it enough."
You'd sniffle with an added nod as he pulled back the covers to get in next to you. He'd turn off the lamp before you found your place against his chest.
"I'll be right here when you get up, okay?" He assured.
"Promise?" You mumbled.
"I promise. I also promise not to make you feel like this again."
You didn't know what to say. It was like he had completely forgiven you for everything. "I don't want to lose you."
"You haven't sweetheart. I'm right here," he said, running a hand through your hair. "I love you."
Quinn's admission made you cry again, "I love you, too, baby."
"Shh, shh, you don't need to cry. I'm right here. I'm yours as long as you want me."
#đmaven's love notes#quinn hughes#quinn hughes imagine#quinn hughes x y/n#quinn hughes x reader#quinn hughes one shot#quinn hughes fanfiction#quinn hughes fic#hockey imagine#hockey oneshot#hockey fanfiction#hockey fic
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âââ âđeedsâ
richter belmont x fem!reader
â summary; After a battle, he confronts his s/o with a mix of frustration and desire, craving comfort and intimacy to bridge the emotional distance between them.
word count; 358
cw; angst, suggestive, mutual pinning/established relationship (you interpret it as you like)
a/n; why is he so underrated like hello? hes so fine + hes a belmont
The battle had been brutal, the air thick with the stench of blood and the lingering heat of battle. Richter Belmont stood at the edge of the campsite, his body battered and bruised, his breath heavy and ragged. The moonlight painted his features in sharp relief, his eyes dark with exhaustionâbut there was something else there too.
You had barely spoken a word since the fight had ended, tending to your wounds with quiet precision, and Richter hated the silence between you. The distance. It felt like a chasm between you that hadnât been there before.
You were trying to focus on cleaning your injuries, but he wasnât making it easy. His gaze never left you, the weight of his stare making your skin tingle with something far more intense than just exhaustion.
âHey,â Richterâs voice was rough, strained with something you couldnât quite place. âDonât ignore me like that.â
You glanced up, meeting his heated gaze, but didnât say anything.
He took a step closer, his movements slow but deliberate. âI donât like it when you act like Iâm some stranger, especially after all weâve been through.â His voice dropped lower, thick with frustration and something elseâsomething that made your pulse quicken. âYouâre the only one I trust to the fullestâŠyou know that, right?â
You said nothing, but your breath hitched as he took another step, now right in front of you. He reached out, his fingertips brushing your jaw, a subtle touch that made your heart race.
âI need you,â he murmured, his lips so close to yours you could feel his breath ghosting across your skin. His other hand hovered near your waist, as if waiting for permission. "I hate feeling like thisâlike there's something between us. Like Iâve failed you."
You shook your head, your chest tight with the feelings you had been holding back all night. âYou havenât⊠but I canât just forget everything that happened.â
âIâm not asking you to forget,â Richter breathed, his lips now brushing your ear as he moved closer. "But don't shut me out... not when I need you the most."
His voice was laced with need, and before you could say anything more, his lips found yours in a kiss that was desperate, raw, like he was trying to make up for all the tension and silence that had built between you.
The kiss deepened, both of you eager to close the gap, to feel the connection that had been strained by the fight. His arms pulled you closer, hands roaming to press against your back, the intensity of the moment sparking something far more than just physical desire.
As you finally broke the kiss for air, Richter looked at you, his gaze dark with longing, and whispered, âI need you, more than you know.â
You could only nod, breathless, feeling the weight of his need settle between you like a heavy promise.
© STVRBOYY â do not copy, translate, modify, or plagiarize my work. reblogs are appreciated!
#richter x reader#castlevania#castlevania x reader#castlevania nocturne x reader#castlevania x you#richter belmont#richter belmont x reader#castlevania nocturne#castlevania netflix#castlevania nocturne season 2
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I can't imagine being Mrs Everdeen. But I do wish to try.
Imagine standing to the side roped off from your children and being unable to do anything as your youngest is reaped. Knowing she won't make it because she's too tenderhearted and too young. You know as her name is called, that she will die. And yet you can't change it. You just gets to watch as your child is slowly marched forward to her death.
Imagine the hopelessness she feels. Having braved the few years of Katniss's first reapings alone, and now having to endure Prims reaping and all the while wishing she had her husband by her side to help her get through it. But she's done it for the past four years with Katniss, so surely this one won't be as bad? Only it's worse. Because it's Prims first reaping. The chances of it even happening are so slim. Katniss made sure of that. And yet, it is, in fact, her name being called.
And you wait in silence as your gut sinks and your eyes close, and you take a second to remember your daughter before she's gone. You regret giving birth because all it's done is lead to here. You regret it, and you feel so resentful. And some part of you thinks this isn't the way it should be. Not her. Not Prim. She doesn't have what it takes to claw and strangle her way to the top. She's dead before she's started.
Your gut lunches and your heart beats too fast. You feel sick. Until you hear your other daughter. The one who has been your family's rock. Who's your rock, is now stepping forward to take her sisters place. You release a breath and part of you unclenches. Because even if you would never speak it, even if you would never want to think it, even as you think it and feel disgusted with yourself, you know that you would rather Katniss go in.
She could do it. She's done so much. For years she's taken care of a family. Kept them fed by skill alone. She's your daughter. You should tremble at the thought of her going in, and you do. But not as much as knowing it could have been Prim.
And all you can do is sit back, watch it happen feeling more than grateful. Knowing this child has saved you in more ways than you can count and how often you've failed her. Despite failing her again and again every day she still continues to provide and protect. She still takes the role of mother when you haven't.
As your sixteen year old daughter marches forward, you get to feel safe one last time, grateful to have this decision made for you.
#katniss everdeen#primrose everdeen#mrs everdeen#reaping#hunger games#imagine having to live knowing for one guilty second you were grateful your child chose to die#prim and katniss got two different mothers#prim still got to view her as a mother#katniss just saw another person to feed#god i love them#katniss was HOPE for so many people not just peeta and the districts#she was her familys pride and joy#i think after they both lost prim mrs everdeen found it hard to look Katniss in the eye knowing Prim died doing what she taught her#she always thought it would be katniss dying from sneaking out#she never expected it to be prim because she wanted to save people like her mother#god the guilt in this family is wild#this is by no means justification for mrs everdeen as someone who has mommy issues i love that katniss and her mother always have#a strained relationship this is just to say n#mrs everdeen has a narrative too#id love to see what shes feeling as the series happens#watching peeta almost die for her#knowing your daughter not only saved you but all the districts as well#just having to be proud of her but knowing youve lost the chance to say it and step up for her#just i feel a lot about this
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... And P4 takes place in 1999 hm.... Interesting đ
#nigga what if you died doing this kira shit hello?#i know how strained their relationship is in p6 so he clearly didn't visit enough. it makes much of an effort to contact her#i know y'all say that is difficult for him to show he cares about people but it's hard to feel bad when he's such a bum#like he's really good for nothing it's only bc they're Araki's faves that pol n Joseph survived in egypt cuz#what has jotaro done successfully#sorry i always rant about him but he's really just some guy to me. just some guy in the narrative even#jjba lb#diamond is unbreakable#not really but y'know
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Girl, I Do This Often
Synopsis. How does he cope with a sĂ©x ban? He doesnât.
Pairings. [SEPARATE] Gojo x Reader, Sukuna x Reader, Choso x Reader, Geto x Reader, Nanami x Reader, Toji x Reader
Content. MDNI, fem! reader, established relationship, rough sĂ©x, unprotected, stuff with pantĂes, gaggĂng, brĂ©eding, Nanami is a bit mean, overstĂm, finger suckĂng, really desperate boys, light smackĂng (Nanami), bondagĂ© + vĂbrators (Geto), swearing.
Word count. 5.2k
A/N. Guess what, ya girl just turned 19 yippeeeee.
⥠TOJI FUSHIGURO - 4 days
On the first day, Tojiâs more amused than anything.
A sex ban? With him? Ridiculous, he predicted a full 24 hours before you come crawling back, just begging to be split-apart on his cock. And he tells you so, too - a little over five times as he kisses your pouty lips, muttering a smug, âYouâll be eating your words soon enough, doll.â
By the third day, heâs beginning to think that okay, maybe you were serious about the ban after all. How cute - real cute.Â
Heâs left to do nothing but complain pathetically on the phone to a very reluctant Shiu. Who doesnât have much to say other than cut off Tojiâs ramblings about ânot having your pretty pussy all dayâ to groan, âShut the fuck up and beg for her forgiveness. Iâm hanging up.â
Toji can only scoff at the thought. Beg for forgiveness? Him? Toji Fushiguro never begs, he never-
That was until the fourth day.Â
With you - bent over the kitchen counter in his t-shirt - and nothing but his t-shirt.
âPlease, pretty.â Toji drags his lips down your neck, just loving the way your traitorous hips are grinding back into his. âSaid mâsorry, right? Donât ya miss this?â
And you can only look behind your shoulder at the big arms around your waist, muscled thighs pressed up against yours. Angling your head just right to catch the way his hands snake down to your squirming hips to help you draw slow little circles against the rock-hard erection straining against his pants.
So close. So big.
Big enough that youâre almost thinking of throwing this sec ban out of the window altogether - almost.
But that little smirk of Tojiâs is infuriating enough that youâre gasping out a breathless little, âI-Iâm still mad at you, yâknow? You never let me-â The words die in your throat as Toji pulls his pants down just enough for his aching cock to spring free. So angry and painfully hard, leaking hot precum all over your thighs.Â
âNo no no- hah. Keep talking.â he grits out, breath hot against your ear. Hips pushing and pulling. âPlease- keep talking.â
And fuck you didnât know what was harder - trying to find your voice, or ripping your eyes away from Tojiâs cock long enough that you could.Â
âB-because you-â you choke out, watching the way he takes his massive cock in his hands. Staring to pump so slow - so lazy - no rhythm or reason other than getting off so filthily to the sound of your voice. âYou never let me take-â He wraps your smaller hands around his dick, so hot and heavy in your palms. â-charge.â
âF-fuck-â Toji lets out a low hiss, head thrown back as you thumb teasingly under his sensitive slit, trying to fuck something delicious out. âYer killinâ me doll. Killing me.â Whether from your words or from the way youâre sliding him so lewdly between your puffy folds, you didnât know.Â
And Toji didnât either. Hell, he doesnât even seem to be breathing as he shifts his toned hips so familiarly. Head filled with only you and your heavenly cunt and you.Â
âToji-â you mewl. âNeed you so bad.â
If he was any lesser man, Toji wouldâve just bullied himself into your dripping cunt already, fucked you into the counter until there was nothing about any sex ban in your pretty lilâ mind. Instead, heâs panting out an absolutely wrecked, âPlease. Then take all the charge you want, pretty.â Â Fat head lining up with your sloppy hole. âNext time.â
And oh has it really been that long?
Because Tojiâs just barely pushing into your plushy walls, and he already feels like he could cum right then and there. The stretch too sinful. Your walls too tight. So cute how youâre already mumbling his name so deliriously.Â
âAwww,â he coos, watching awe-struck at the way you flatten your hands on the counter, fucking yourself back into him in short, shallow little grinds. âThe s-sex ban was for ah- nothing, huh?â
Youâre pulling him impossibly closer by the hair, catching his lips in such a searing kiss. Drinking in Tojiâs guttural grunt as you bite down on his lower lip, âAre ya gonna sh-shut up nâ fuck me or do I need ngh- another sex ban?â
âNo, maâam.â he grins, kissing back so mockingly soft. And you know heâs making fun of you with the way heâs twitching so wildly inside your pussy. Veins dragging against all the right spots as he reels his hips back, back, back - only to slam his cock fully inside. âGuess youâre the one mm- in charge right now, huh?â
Over and over again. Fucking you exactly the way heâs wanted these past four days - and then some.Â
Hitting your cervix - but it feels like your fucking lungs. Heavy balls smacking against your ass, so hard that heâs sure itâll leave some obscene marks for him to point out next time. One hand around your throat, the other keeping your slutty, trembling hips in place while youâre torn between running away and bucking back for more more more-
âRight here.â
Itâs all you can do to whirl your head around, eyes glassy and unfocused, whining a broken, âWh-what?âÂ
âRightâŠâ Trailing down, featherlight, right where he knew he was wrecking your insides. âHere. Sâwhere I belong.â Pressing hard. âNâ mâgonna make sure you donât forget it.â
⥠NANAMI KENTO - 1 week
A week. One week of being patient with your silly idea to âspice things upâ. One week of pretending like he wasnât excusing himself during important meetings to have his cock in his hands - thinking of nothing but you and that sinful little dress you had on today.
One week was all it took for Nanami to have a bad day at work. And you could tell when he did.Â
By the way that front door slammed, unfamiliarly harsh footsteps sounding against the hardwood floors. And all it takes is one look at you laid out so prettily on the couch and Nanamiâs mouth drops into a soft oh!Â
One hand immediately loosening his tie, the other snaking down to his belt. Ashen, tense, - and you have half the mind to wonder whether heâs even breathing.Â
Not even looking at you as he mutters a low, âPanties off. Spread those legs.â
That was a few hours ago.Â
Before you knew it, your husband had you splayed out like such a slut for him on the couch - too starved to even think about making it to the bed. Legs on his sculpted shoulders, panties in tatters on the floor because you were taking too fucking long. Cock so angry and sensitive as he bullies into your snug cunt, stuffing you full of his cum.
Again. And again and again like he wanted to fuck any and every thought of that stupid sex ban out of your delirious mind.Â
âK-Kento- what-â he pulls you into a bruising kiss. Just a sloppy clash of teeth and spit and hands everywhere. âYouâre ngh- different.â
At this, Nanami has the audacity to laugh - laugh. Hips snapping impossibly deeper, âYeah? Nâ whoâs fault is hah- that? Whoâs fault is it th-that we ended hngh- up like-â Pushing your knees all the way up to your tits, groaning at the mess of cum and slick pooling beneath you. â-this?â
Cock just ramming into you, prominent veins nudging against your gummy walls so agonizingly. The couch creaking in protest as he uses your pretty lilâ cunt exactly the way heâs been fantasizing this past week.
And when all you can do is let out delirious little moans in response, Nanami raises his hand up, up, up. Coming down on your ass, hard.Â
Smack!
âDidnât you know weâd end up here?â
Oh the words hit you harder than that large palm-print stinging your ass. Tight pussy clenching and trying to milk the fucking soul out of him as you sob, âI- I didnât-â Smack! Youâre jolting at the impact, hips bucking wildly as you gasp, â-I did! Wanted this so bad, Kento. I did I did-â
And yeah, Nanami knew that. He knew youâd pulled this little âsex banâ stunt to make him break - to have him fuck you like the slut you are. But hearing the words from your pretty mouth had his balls squeezing so painfully.Â
âKnew it.â he manages to grit out. âKnew you were such a slut, my love.â Words strained with each harsh thrust, âNâ as my slut, y-you can ngh- take one more, right?â You keen at how soft his tone was, like he was whispering sweet little nothings to you instead of promises to absolutely break you. Fingers trailing down to draw lewd patterns on your throbbing clit, âRight?â
And as if to prove you could, heâs squeezing his swollen cock harder into your plushy walls. Faster. Unforgiving. Fat, leaking tip hitting all those sweet spots heâs mapped out, in time with his abuse on your clit.
âDidnât hah- have to lock myself in my office for nothing, right?â Pulling your trembling hips flush against his toned ones, âHave to get by with j-just a pretty picture this week for nothing?â Hips out of control now. Bruising. Almost painful with the stretch and the sheer pressure of being so full. âSâall for this, right?â
Smack!Â
âOh God, Kento- Fuck fuck fuck fuck.â
âYeah? Feels good?â he nips at your lower lip, âGood enough to fuck- take another one?â
You were sure if he came once more then it might just be the death of you.
Youâre not even lucid enough to realize what reaction youâre giving him - all you know is that it isnât good enough for Nanami.Â
Because he lets out a tut, hand dancing across your stomach to where he knew he was absolutely making a mess of you inside.Â
âFine.â And something about the way he says it makes your heart stop, already knowing that it didnât bode well for you or your poor cunt. âGuess I hafta ngh- help you.â Sure enough, Nanami wastes no time before pushing down on your abdomen.Â
The both of you watch - awe-struck and speechless - as your overfilled pussy gushes all around him.Â
And shit neither of you can even begin to think of what a bitch itâll be to clean out this couch later on. Too caught up in the way youâre soaking Nanamiâs merciless cock in that sinful mix of cum and slick. Thick, and hot, drooling down the side of your puffy folds.Â
âSee? Enough space, no?â
You raise your eyes, teary and hazy with lust, up to meet Nanamiâs darkened ones and oh-
You werenât going to make it out alive.Â
Especially not when he leans down, whispering so raggedly in your ear, âNow I get to give ya another weekâs worth more, right?â
⥠GETO SUGURU - 9 days
Bzzzt-bzzzt-bzzzt-
You didnât know how it ended up this way. How that stupid bet about whoâd be the needier one made Geto the one with the sex ban.Â
How he had you tied across from him so prettily on the bed, a bullet vibrator stuffed up your dripping cunt, unable to do anything but whine and watch as he spreads his bare, muscled thighs.
Tip flushed your favorite shade of pink, matching those panties wrapped around his throbbing cock. So angry and leaking all over his fist as one hand slides up, up, up. The other, fiddling with that tiny metal remote.Â
âYouâre drooling, gorgeous. So desperate, huh?â
You know you arenât - but you canât help the way your face burns at your boyfriendâs low chuckle. Thighs squeezing together at the heavenly sight before you. âN-no fair, Sugu.â you whine. âI want to-â
Intensity setting 2.
But whatever words get stuck in your throat as Geto draws harsh, quick little circles on the intensity setting, smirking at the way youâre so wrecked already.Â
Bzzzt-bzzzt-bzzzt-
âI-I want to-â he mocks your pathetic little whines, acting for all the life of him that they didnât make his dick twitch so wildly in his hands. âMy poor baby. Sânot nice, right?â And if you were embarrassed before then it was absolutely nothing in comparison to when Geto knits his brows in mock concern, eyes locked on yours. Hand still moving down his cock, âBut isnât this what you wanted? With the sex ban? Isnât this-â Hips bucking up to show off how sloppily heâs fucking his fist - and your panties along with it, â-what you were asking for?â
âNo.â youâre tugging at the ties at your wrist, âI wantedâŠâ
Intensity setting 3.Â
But oh itâs like Geto was well and fully intent on leaving you speechless - and succeeding at it too.Â
Because he immediately brings up your panties - flimsy and just so soaked - up to his face, breathing in so filthily. And as if he couldnât help himself - as if he didnât want to help himself - the remote falls out of Getoâs hand, âaccidentallyâ locked on the highest setting, first wrapping around his cock to make a mess of himself.Â
âF-fuck-â he cracks one eye open, balls squeezing so painfully at the way you were almost in tears trying to get some semblance of friction. âHeh, looks like Iâm winning the bet.â
You scoff, but it comes out so pathetically like a whine. âYouâre a cheater, Iâd have w-won this bet otherwise.â
Ah, how Geto loved your smart mouth - though, he probably loved it even more when youâre fucked dumb. But, right now, bet at the forefront of his mind, the next best thing he could do is shove those sinful panties into your mouth.Â
Hand flying up and down his cock faster and faster as you choke like such a slut on it. Greedily eyeing the way your lip wobbles, big fat tears welling up in your eyes, cunt all glistening and quivering as Geto blindly reaches behind to grab ahold of that remote again.Â
Intensity setting 4.Â
âAnd youâre too cute.â he drops his head, breath ghosting your lips. âSo if you ask me nicely I might just-â Thumb playing around with the intensity, pressing down, hard. As if it would translate to your needy cunt, â-give you my cock, gorgeous.â
Bzzzt-bzzzt-bzzzt-
Itâs all you can do to keen as his fingers get faster on the remote, other hand getting so sloppy on his painfully hard cock. Matching that sinful little ah! ah! ah! leaving your swollen lips. Sinful - and stubborn, still refusing to say those words that you knew Geto wanted to hear so badly.Â
âAwww, still not giving up?â At your delirious little headshake, âThen how about this?âÂ
Intensity setting 5.Â
And shit it makes you arch off the bed entirely. It makes you let out a strangled yelp of, âOh- fuck. Fuck fuck fuck Sugu, mâgonna-â It makes you cum.
âThaâs it.â Geto canât help but let go of his aching cock to draw rough, messy little circles on your clit. Grinning at the way youâre so pretty when you cum untouched - all for him. Over and over and- He reaches over to catch your lips with his, tongue dancing with yours, around your soaked panties.Â
So filthy and dizzying that he almost forgets about that bet - almost. Because youâre murmuring something so incoherent into his lips.Â
Bzzzt-bzzzt-bzzzt-
God, doesnât matter who wins next time - he needs to fucking do this again.
âWhatâs that?â he leans in tauntingly, pulling the fabric out of your mouth, finger still running circles around the intensity. Absolutely addicted to the way youâre twitching and whining at the aftershocks of your orgasm, âMâsorry, gorgeous, this vibrator is too loud. Speak up fâme, hm?â
âP-please fuck me, Sugu.â
âThought youâd never ask.â
⥠CHOSO KAMO - 21 hours
If Choso had it his way, then youâd both still be at home and heâd be balls-deep inside your sloppy pussy - fucking you over and over into the mattress until the neighbours file another noise complaint.Â
But, alas, Jin Itadori was sure to hire a hitman - or worse, Sukuna - on him if he missed another family dinner. Which is how it ended up with you, sat so prettily across the table from him, watching through his long lashes at the way that red dress hugged you so sinfully.Â
So right, in a way that made Choso almost jealous. So irresistibly, in a way that had Sukuna looking over a few too many times and-
Chosoâs chair almost hits the floor with how fast he stands.
Fuck it.
âSh-shit, Choso I-âÂ
âKeep ah- that dress up, baby. Unless ya wanna get it d-dirty.â heâs panting into your open mouth, tongue so hotly toying with yours as he gives you another harsh thrust. âThough, I donât ngh- mind.â
And he was telling the truth, too. Choso was in no way gentle with the way he had you sat on the bathroom counter, flimsy dress bunched up at your hips. Strong arms spreading your legs so shamefully while he bullied his cock into you with reckless abandon.
Over and over and-
âCho!â you yelp, as he hits that one spot so expertly. Flashing you a fucked-out grin as how youâre scrambling to cover your mouth. âTh-theyâll hear.â
âSo?â
And itâs all you can do to stop your jaw from falling slack once more - both in disbelief and at the way heâs fucking you so mean. So desperately like he hasnât in months - years, even. Just unfocused, sloppy movements to milk his cock on your snug cunt.
âI donât mind hah- that either.â Hand dipping underneath your soaked panties - just lazily pulled to the side - to roll your swollen clit between two fingers. âW-what I do mind is my oh- fuck girl holdinâ out on me and wearing that fucking dress on the s-same day.â
Oh you knew you were pushing the limits of your sex ban by wearing his favorite dress, that it would drive him absolutely wild. You just didnât know it would be this easy.
âBut you promised.â youâre letting out such broken little whines, muffled through your fingers, ones that go straight to Chosoâs achingly hard cock. âYou hngh- promised we wouldnât at your familyâsâŠâ
The only response you get is Choso rolling his hips deeper into yours, so bruising in a way you knew would make you feel so guilty even when all the marks are covered up. Leaving hot, open-mouthed kisses down your neck in time with the way he alternates between hitting your poor, abused cervix and that one spot.Â
Gasping out a ragged, âI know- I know I know fuck- Hah- I know.â Words strained - like he was losing a bit of his sanity with each thrust. And needed you to be the same. âBut shit, baby. Do you know how p-pretty you look right now? Hngh- how fuckable?â
âY-youâre so fuckinâ dirty.â you mewl, as if you were any better. As if your gummy walls werenât sucking the fuckin soul out of Choso right now. âShouldâve made the ngh- sex ban even long-â
He bites down at the soft crook of your neck, growling out a little, âDonât even joke about that.âÂ
And if Choso expected a response, then he didnât act that way.Â
Hips just erratic against yours, fingers even worse. Not even moving in circles anymore, just messy, sloppy patterns to-
No.Â
You gasp at the realization, the deft movements of Chosoâs fingers, and it just makes you all the more fucked-out underneath him. Scrambling to grab at the counter - Chosoâs hair - his shoulders - just anything and everything to stop yourself from alerting the entire household to what you two were up to. Letting him fuck you like his favorite sextoy, fingers so so messy and spelling out a relentless little C-H-O-S-O-C-H-O-S-
And then youâre cumming and cumming so hard that it almost hurts. Stars behind your eyes, blood roaring in your eyes. Chosoâs massive cock fucking any and every thought of the dinner just downstairs out of your mind.Â
âF-fuck fuck fuck- ngh- weâre never coming back here for dinner again.â
And itâs all you can do to drag your nails down his broad back, leaving deep red marks that make his balls squeeze so painfully.Â
It makes him throw his head back, gasping out your name so loud. It makes him pull your hips so bruisingly against his.Â
It makes him cum, spilling thick, hot ropes of cum into your pussy. So messy with the way itâs too much to bear, dribbling down your swollen folds, forming a lewd little pool below you. And Choso doesnât give a fuck - doesnât care if he leaves marks that everyone will see. Or if that slutty dress of yours has a suspicious little damp patch as he swiftly pulls out to snap your panties back in place.Â
Whispering lowly against your lips, âK-keep it in till we leave, hm?â
âCho-â
Knock! Knock! Knock!
âThe fuck? You brats fall in or something?â
⥠RYOMEN SUKUNA - 2 days
The great Ryomen Sukuna has always been terrifying - but never before has he been this ruthless. So utterly savage. Destroying every single curse he comes across in the blink of an eye - friend or foe, big or small.Â
Why? All because he hasnât been able to fuck your pretty lilâ cunt in two days. Which, in his opinion, are two days too long. All because of some stupid little experiment about wanting to see how long it would take to see the king of curses crack.
And when those trembling curses heard about this ah- sex ban through the grapevine, well, they wrote it off as another baseless rumor. Ha, Ryomen Sukuna cracking? Never.Â
âPleaseâŠbrat.â he bites down on your earlobe, further pushing up your expensive robes - ones heâd bought just to get on your good side - to sink his cock deeper inside your heavenly cunt. âThere I said it. Now jusâ a bit more-â
And maybe youâre a mastermind - maybe youâre an idiot. Because youâre digging your heels into the mattress, pushing off ever-so-slightly from his aching hard cock. So thick and angry as it slips out of your sloppy hole.Â
You bat your lashes so deceivingly innocently up at a pissed off Sukuna, âI didnât like your tone.â Crossing your legs to cover that view he was so fixated on, âEither you beg nâ start all over again or-â
âFine.â he grits out the word, like it physically hurt to. Though, nothing for what falls from his lips next, âPlease.â
âLouder.â
âPlease.â
There you had it. And you canât help but smirk, âWell, I liked that one-â
Nothing more is said - in Sukunaâs eyes, nothing more has to be said. Because heâs got his favorite lilâ human all needy and spread so shamefully in front of him, what more could he want? Sukuna grabs your ankles, pulling you to him like a ragdoll. Wasting no time before heâs splitting you apart on his rock-hard cock.
âYa donât hah- know how many curses I killed these past two days.â he kisses your ankles so softly. âHow many I wanted to kill.â
And God, if you didnât know any better youâd say itâs like he wanted to kill you with the way Sukuna barely even gives you time to adjust. Stuffing you full of his cock, so hot and thumping against your gummy walls in a maddening little bump! bump! bump!Â
Letting out a strangled moan of, âThere you go.â Brows scrunching together, looking wrecked already as he rocks his hips into yours - fast. Hard. hands coming up underneath your ass to arch you deeper into him, âSqueezinâ me so- tight. Heh, almost â
âOh hngh- âKuna!â you moan, eyes snapping down to the way your cunt was taking him up so good. Puffy folds bulging around his massive cock, looking like they were sucking the fucking soul out of Sukuna as his massive cock disappears in and out in and out in and- âSâtoo- much-â
âShut up.â he drops his head, one hand so bruising all over your body - groping your ass, your tits, playing with your throbbing clit. âYa wanted hah- me to talk, right? And I say-â The other, squeezing your cheeks together into a pathetic lilâ pout, âOpen up.â
Itâs so embarrassing the way you canât do anything but let your mouth fall open so sluttily, tongue lolling out just in time to catch the stream of saliva as Sukuna spits once. Twice.Â
So filthy with the way he lets it splatter against the corner of your mouth - on purpose.Â
âWanted the king to beg, huh?â Each word is punctuated by such a harsh thrust, twitching balls stinging against your ass. âWell you got it. H-how does it feel, huh?â
And you couldnât speak up even if you wanted to. Sukunaâs hand too tight around your face, cock too merciless. Slamming his hips down faster and faster as he runs his mouth, like he was taking revenge for the last two days. Again. And again. And again and again-
Grinning at your delirious little gurgles, âHeh, what? Canât talk?âÂ
And as if to prove his point, Sukuna loops two big arms around your waist, falling back on his knees with you sat like such a slut on his cock. Fingers lacing above your head to sink you impossibly deeper and deeper-
âOh my god- K-â Your breath hitches as he fucks up into you so easily. Feeling more and more like some plaything with each ripple of his muscles underneath your legs. So hard you were sure it would leave marks - both confirming and condemning those rumors you knew have been flying around. His balls on your ass, thighs underneath yours, nails dragging lightly down your skin.Â
Resting on your waist, holding your quivering hips still as he grunts, âNow shut up. Mâgonna get my fill of the last two days.â
⥠GOJO SATORU - 4 hours
To the great Gojo Satoru, this droning, 4-hour meeting with the elders was a nightmare. To you, it was exactly where you wanted him
It wasnât often that the strongest was tense - jittery, even, like he was about to jump out of his seat at any given moment. But, really, it was almost impossible not to, considering that stern talking-to youâd given him about âno sneaking out during meetings.â Especially when youâre sat across from him looking so beautifully unbothered.
Your smile too pretty, your uniform unbuttoned just enough that it gave him such a heavenly view when you bent over just so. Â
Oh, how Gojo wishes he could just-
And that was when he felt it.Â
That slow, slight touch up his inner thigh - so fleeting and light that he almost thinks heâs imagining it. But, no, Gojo could never mistake any touch from you.Â
It sends his entire skin burning to catch your eye ever-so-briefly from across the table. A tiny smirk gracing those pretty lips as your heel inches up, up, up-
âGojo, do you have anything to comment on the recent increase in curse sightings?â
He stifles a groan underneath one palm, the other snaking under the table just in time to catch your ankle before you can carefully slip away. âI thinkâŠâ he manages to grit out, heady gaze flitting over to yours, â-that is a question my lovely wife and I must discuss first.â
Oh?Â
And then, your back is hitting a plush mattress before you know it - long before the realization hits you that this bastard just fucking teleported the two of you to your bedroom.Â
âT-Toru-â you sputter out, whatever reprimand getting stuck in your throat at how desperate Gojo was acting. Your uniform buttons hitting the floor as he rips open your shirt, hands bunching up your skirt, only having enough patience to just pull aside your soaked panties, rolling your pretty clit between two fingers. Needy. âThe meeting-â
âThe meeting isnât here now, right?âÂ
Words so hoarse it takes you a moment to recognize it as your husbandâs. You were only beginning to wonder just what the fuck youâve gotten yourself into when Gojo tugs down his pants just enough that his rock-hard cock springs free.
And oh then it makes sense. Because Gojo was so hard that it looked painful - so so red, and angry. Soaked in enough precum that it made a damp little patch on his trousers, heavy balls twitching at the mere sound of your voice.
âD-didnât I say no sneaking out this time, Toru?â You buck into his touch, despite your words, eyes locked on the way Gojo stops toying with your clit to pool your sweet sweet juices on his fingertips.
âYou did.â Raising his long, glossy fingers to those pretty pink lips, âBut this is teleporting, not sneaking out, sweetheart.â
Gojoâs like a man possessed as he pops your slick-covered fingers into his mouth, eyes rolling to the back of his head at the sinful taste.Â
Gasping out a wet, âFuck the ban. Canât go without ya. Canât-â One hand sliding his fat tip between your swollen folds, up and down up and down - spreading them apart, just barely dipping into your sloppy entrance. â-canât live without this pretty cunt.â
And then itâs like something snaps - Gojoâs patience, his sanity, the last of his restraint as he sinks his throbbing cock into your plushy walls.Â
Pushing past that first, tight ring of muscle, and at the first feeling of your gummy walls milking his cock, he pants out a strained, âFuck- oh fuck fuck fuck, yer the stuff of dreams, my girl. This cunt- ngh-â Pushing your legs further apart, fingers back on your clit â-wouldâve fucked this cunt right in ah- front of those old toads. But, youâre lucky Iâm a jealous man.â
âOh- oh my god, sâtoo- too- big!â
God, you needed to spread your legs more - as if they werenât being folded apart so easily by a delirious Gojo - maybe breathe, try to relax because Gojo was so big. And so unforgiving.Â
Feeling like he was pushing all the way into your lungs as he thrusts in quick, shallow little thrusts to bully himself inside your snug cunt. Jagged - like he was fighting with some absolutely, depraved, feral part of himself.Â
You can feel the way your hips are torn between pushing away and grinding back down for more more more- And Gojo can, too.
âNo-â he hisses. Brows scrunching in frustration, hips becoming more and more sloppy - frenzied. âNo no no no no- hold on, sweetheart. Need this, need this so bad.â
Going faster.Â
Deeper.Â
You sob, ankles locking around his slutty waist. âB-but Toru-â You make a feeble last attempt at regaining your sanity. Your entire body jolting as Gojo presses so hard on your clit. â-we should ngh- hurry up. W-weâll be late to the meeting-â
But does it really matter? Gojo doesnât think so, not when he finally bottoms out in one, rough thrust. Groaning as his sensitive balls smack your ass.
Your cunt so slutty and tight - sucking him up so good despite your cute lilâ pleas about something stupid like âresponsibilitiesâ.Â
So he really canât help the way he wastes no time before reeling his hips back - all the way till his weeping tip is just kissing your sloppy hole. Before fucking into you completely - rough. Unrestrained. The same way he imagined taking you on that meeting room table. Over and over and-
âNot yet.â he grins against your lips, âWeâre not done discussing the recent increase in curse sightings.â
A/N. Gojoâs came out toooo long I donât even like this man fr (loud incorrect buzzer).
Plagiarism not authorized.
#jjk x reader#jjk smut#jjk x you#gojo x reader#geto x reader#sukuna x reader#nanami x reader#gojo smut#geto smut#sukuna smut#nanami smut#tonywrites#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#choso x reader#choso smut#toji x reader#toji smut#jjk x reader smut#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader smut#gojo x reader smut#toji x reader smut#satoru gojo x reader#toji fushiguro smut#nanami x reader smut#choso x reader smut#geto x reader smut
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I COULD PLAY THE DOCTOR (I CAN CURE YOUR DISEASE)
pair: logan howlett x fem!reader
wc: 4.1k
contains: 18+ SMUT MDNI, swearing, established relationship, logan's pov, written with origins!logan in mind, nat veering dangerously closer to a/b/o territory with every passing day, rut cycles, oral sex (fem!receiving), fingering (fem!receiving), multiple orgasms, gratuitous amounts of dirty talk, p in v, rough sex, biting, hair pulling, size kink, belly bulging, pussy pronouns, one (1) single use of the word daddy, scent kink, pain kink, breeding kink ofc, knotting (donât look at meâŠ), squirting, porn w/ plot, no use of y/n.
natâs note: donât look at meâŠi donât know how many times i swore up and down iâd never write something like this but iâm a confirmed liar apparently soâŠhere. i mean i just figured i'm in a rut artistically so therefore the only answer is writing logan in a rut physically...i can do what i want and i don't need to explain myself or my horny thoughts. also, i debated posting this in the wake of everything that's gone down over the past two days that is still escalating and will continue to escalate in the coming weeks, but i think everyone could use a little escape from how scary things may seem right now. take a break from all the terrifying news sites and read about logan wanting to breed you :) kisses!
divider by angel @saradika-graphics!
it's been another six months, and logan needs your help...
The burn starts on the walk home from work, a pulse of heat deep in Logan's gut that grows with every step.
It spreads slowly, sinking into his muscles and seeping up his spine as he rounds the last corner, your place less than a block away now.
It caught him off guard this time, an itch burying itself under his skin earlier in the day only to get worse and worse as he worked.
He usually knew the signs well enough to feel them start creeping in, and he was dead sure it wasn't for another few weeks.
Apparently, he was wrong.
Loganâs jaw clenches as he picks up his pace, every nerve ending in his body straining to break into a full blown sprint at the thought of you, all alone and waiting for him.
His fingers curl into tight fists, nails pressing into his palms to ground himself, though itâs hardly enough. The faint scent of you drifts up from his shirt, not even a long day at the lumberyard enough to drown it out.
By the time he reaches your door, his heartbeat is a heavy thud in his ears, syncing with the building ache of desire wracking through his body like the earth rattling boom of a raging thunder storm.
He fumbles through getting his key into the lock, hands unsteady as he tugs the door open with a little more force than necessary and finally steps inside.
The second he closes the door behind him, the heat surges, thrumming through his veins and flooding his chest. Your scent fills the air completely, stronger now, wrapping around him so thick and sweet.
"Darlin'?" His voice comes out rougher than he intends, but he's beyond caring.
Your voice floats from the other room, casual, warm enough to send a jolt through him. Logan drops his axe from his shoulder, leaning it against the door as he starts down the familiar path to your bedroom.
You're spread out on his side of the bedâoblivious, curled up with a book, wrapped in one of the flannels he must have left the last time he stayed over.
Just the sight of you does something to him, like a match dragged against a strike pad, damned on setting everything ablaze.
You glance up, and the soft smile on your lips falters as you catch sight of him.
Logan knows what he must look like, his eyes all dark and predatory, chest heaving as he rakes his hungry gaze over you like a wolf watches a lamb grazing too close to its den.
He doesnât say anything at first, just stalks toward you with a purpose thatâs as undeniable as the heat pouring off him in waves.
The book slips from your fingers, forgotten, as you lean back, the small sound of your breath hitching under the weight of his gaze is music to his ears.
Logan pauses at the edge of the bed, towering over you, letting himself drink in the way you look. So soft and serene, like some kind of invitation that begs him closer. His flannel draped loosely over your shouldersâshrouding you in his scent.Â
The urge to pounce on you fights against his normal instinct to savor every second, to draw it out until the heat pooling in his gut becomes downright unbearable.
âBeen thinkinâ about you all damn day,â he mutters, voice thick and dark as molasses, rough from restraint heâs quickly losing. His knuckles brush against your thigh, then tighten, holding you in place as he leans down, his breath hot against your neck. âThinkinâ about what I was gonna when I finally got my hands on you.â
Your skin blooms with warmth beneath his touch, and he grins against your neck, the edge of his teeth grazing you just enough to make you squirm. He growls low in his throat, that itch heâs been fighting nearly all day clawing its way up to the surface with a vengeance.
The primal urge inside of him screaming to claim claim claim take take take mate mate mate breed breed breed.
You tilt your head to the side with a soft sigh, freeing up more space for him to nose along your skin. âIs it time?â
Logan's breath catches as your question hangs in the air, thick with anticipation. The soft simplicity of it ignites the wildfire burning in his gut, every ounce of restraint slipping away like sand through his fingers.
âYeah, baby,â he growls, slipping his fingers under the worn cotton of your shorts, feeling the bare skin beneath. âItâs time.â
You shift, hands going to the buttons of his flannel like youâre going to take it off. Logan stops you, taking your wrists in his free hand.
âDonât,â he breathes, shaking his head hard enough that his hair flows with it. âLeave it on.â
The thought of you covered in his scent, of his scent mixing with yours to claim you on a level only he can discern sends his mind buzzing.
You look up at him with those wide, trusting eyes, and something in him cracks wide open. The tenderness of your gaze pulls at him, like a tether pulling him back from the edge, but that heat still smolders in his blood, fierce and unyielding.
Logan runs his thumb along the racing pulse of your wrist before he drops them. His hands venture lower, fingers pressing against the inside of your thigh, tracing a deliberate path that makes your body tremble under his touch.
You let out a shuddering breath, the scent of your arousal swirling through the air is enough to make him crave more.
In one rough tug, Logan yanks you towards the edge of the bed as he falls to his knees. Your hips held tight in his hands as he lurches forward, burying his nose in the soft junction where your leg and inner thigh meet.
He inhales deep, greedy lungfuls of your scent. A guttural growl rumbles through his chest, his eyes screwing shut at the sheer amount of too much that courses through him. He feels dizzy with it, high on the pheromones pumping from you in waves.
Youâre soaked already, the wet fabric of your shorts melded to the shape of your cunt. He canât help but run his nose along the slick seam of you, reveling in the way your legs twitch on either side of his head, in the short gasp you let out.
âLogan.â Your voice is nothing but a mewl, pleading and desperate.
âMissed you,â he rasps, his voice rough, almost unrecognizable. The edge of need in him makes his hands shake, sliding up your thighs, urging them even further apart as he settles between them.
Loganâs fingers dig into your skin, he lets his thumbs brush up, hooking them into the waistband of your shorts to tug them down your legs in one sharp yank. He groans at the sight of you completely bare, no underwear.
âFuck, look at you,â he grates, his thumb coming down to slip through your dripping cunt. Your hole flutters desperately around him, needy little clenches like itâs trying to suck him in. âSheâs all ready for me, huh? Been waiting for me to come home and give her some attention?â
âPlease,â you whimper, your voice thick with longing, the sound going straight to his head, clouding his thoughts.Â
Loganâs pulse races as he watches your body arch instinctively toward his touch, the desperate need in your eyes igniting the raw urges coursing through him.
He canât deny you; he never could. Youâre a feast laid out before him, and heâs starving.
Logan leans closer, letting his tongue flick out to taste you like heâs wanted to since he left for work this morning.Â
âFuck,â he breathes, closing his eyes and losing himself in the moment. He licks a broad stripe from your entrance to your clit, savoring the way your body responds, the way your legs tremble and your hips twitch against his mouth, seeking more. âTastes like fuckinâ heaven, sweetheart.â
The taste of you is intoxicatingâsweet and tangy, flooding his senses with every drag and swirl of his tongue.
Logan canât help but moan against you, the sound vibrating through your body as he dives deeper, his nose nudging against your slick entrance as he shakes his head back and forth like an animalârubbing the plush skin of your inner thighs red and raw with each rough drag of his coarse beard.
Every flick of his tongue sends a shockwave through you, and he revels in the sounds you makeâeach whimper, each moan, a sirenâs call urging him deeper. He laves his tongue around your clit, sucking it gently, pulling at it with his lips as you writhe beneath him, begging for more.Â
He keeps your thighs spread wide, two strong hands pinning them to the mattress so he can devour you just the way you deserve, the sharp dig of your heels into his shoulders only spurs him on.
Your hands bury themselves in his hair, tugging him closer, and he groans into you, letting his tongue delve deeper, seeking out every bit of sweetness he can coax from you.Â
Itâs pure sin, each sound you make, each shiver that runs through you as he takes his time, drinking you down like a man starved.Â
The ache in him intensifies, his own need growing, pulsing. Heâs hard, has been hard since he walked through the front door.
His cock strains against the zipper of his jeans, need pulsing in time with each pump of his blood through his shaft, circling around the base, threatening to expand even without the tight grip of your pussy surrounding him. His hips jerk up on their own volition, desperate for any friction.
âJust like that, Logan,â you gasp, voice breathy and trembling with pleasure.Â
The way you say his nameâraw, desperateâmakes his blood run hotter. He grips your thighs tighter, anchoring you to the bed as he drinks you in, wanting to lose himself in you completely.
Logan pulls away just long enough to catch his breath, looking up at you with lust-drunk eyes, drinking in the sight of your sweaty cheeks, your heavy-lidded gaze, the way your chest rises and falls with each shuddering breath.
The pulse of his cock intensifies, urging him to speed things along. The base desire of his own instincts is getting harder and harder to ignore under your adoring stare.
He feeds his fingers into your clenching hole with no warning, a satisfied smirk tugging his lips up at your sharp gasp. He runs his tongue along his bottom lip, the entire lower half of his face still shining with your essence.
Your cunt swallows him, two thick fingers sinking into the velvety heat like itâs nothing.
Logan groans as he feels you clench around him, your walls fluttering and drawing him in deeper. âThatâs it, baby,â he mutters, his voice hoarse with need. âSo fuckinâ ready for me, so ready for daddyâs fingers in your pussy.â
Your mouth drops open in another devastatingly desperate noise, your hands twist his hair roughly, soft breasts rising and falling each time you gasp for air. The dim light of the sunset filters in through the blinds, highlighting the curves of your body, slick and shining with a thin sheen of sweat.
Every clench of your walls around his fingers shoots a thrill straight to his cock, making him ache with the urge to bury himself inside you. The overwhelming need to take you completely, to mark you and fill you, pulses through his veins until he feels like he might explode.
But heâs not done tasting you yet. Not until youâre practically dripping onto the sheets.
He lowers his mouth back to your core, sucking your clit into his mouth as his fingers pump faster. The sudden intensity makes your thighs shake around his head, and he grins against you. He wants to see you fall apartâwants to feel it.
âLoganâplease, IâŠâ You can barely get the words out, voice breaking as your whole body strains against him, desperate and needy.
The wet slap of his palm against your spit soaked cunt is loud in the quiet of your bedroom, blending with the loud keens that fall from your parted lips. He crooks his fingers, rubbing at that soft, spongy spot inside of you.
âCome on,â he mutters, slick lips brushing against your clit as he speaks. âGive it to me, baby. Show me you're ready for my cock."
He drags the sharp edge of his canine against your pulsing clit with barely any pressure, and you're coming.
Your whole body tenses, back bowing off the mattress as you let out a broken cry of his name. The bite of your nails digging into his scalp feels harsh enough to draw blood, a feeble attempt at grounding yourself against the onslaught of pleasure.Â
Your trembling thighs tighten around his shoulders, gripping him like a vice as your shaking cunt gushes around his fingers. Logan groans at the feeling, eyes slipping shut as you drench his wrist and chin in your juices.
Even then, he doesnât let up, fingers pumping relentlessly as he draws out every pulse, every aftershock of your climax, every tiny spray of your release splashing against his wrist.Â
Heâs lost in the feel of youâslick and trembling under his hands, the scent of your release filling his lungs, thick and intoxicating.
You slump back against the bed, body limp and spent. His own need is a driving, aching force now, clawing at his insides, demanding more.
He slips his fingers free from your dripping heat, dragging them through the wetness coating his chin as he licks them clean with a growl, savoring every taste.
âGood girl,â he purrs, voice thick with pride and satisfaction as he pulls back, leaving your thighs twitching in the wake of his touch. But he still isnât finished. Not even close.
You barely have time to catch your breath before Logan crawls up the bed, his eyes locked on you, pupils blown with need. He looms over you, hands planting on either side of your head. His cock grinds against you through the rough denim, and you can feel just how thick and hard he is, throbbing through the fabric, demanding to be freed.
With a low groan, he shifts his hips, dragging his bulge along your soaked cunt, sending another jolt of pleasure racing through you. His hands are all over you, gripping your waist, hot and possessive.
âFeel that?â he asks, pressing his lips the wild flutter of your pulse, the need to sink his teeth in the soft skin of your neck raises the hair on the back of his neck. âThatâs what you do to me baby. Got me hard as a fuckinâ rock, just aching to be inside you.â
Your arms circle his shoulders, clawing at the fabric off his shirt. âNeed you inside me, Logan. Please, want it so bad.â
The pure need lacing your words, your scent calling out to him, the way he can feel the front of his jeans getting soaked through with the slick pouring from your cunt all pull him deeper into the recesses of his hind-brain.Â
The mounting desperation to stuff you full of his cock finally reaches a fever pitch.
With a deep growl, Logan rears back as far as he can bear, just enough to tear his shirt over his head before he fumbles with the heavy buckle of his belt to free his aching cock.
He shoves his jeans down, boxers quickly following until thereâs nothing separating him from the cool air of your bedroom. His cock springs free, hot and flushed an angry red color, drooling from the tip enough that it drips down to stain the pretty floral sheets of your bed.
Your eyes zero in on him, mouth dropping open at the sight. His cock so heavy it doesnât curve upward to slap against his stomach, instead it hangs down to sway between his thighs as he moves closer.Â
Your legs spread as he nears, slick covered thighs parting to make room for him to slot between them. So obedient, so good, so well trained.
Logan takes himself in his hand, nearly wincing at the blazing temperature of his skin. He secures his hand around the base, squeezing where his knot threatens to pop before heâs even got in you.
He slips the angry head through the folds of your cunt, slapping it against your clit with a wet âthwackâ sound. He can feel the way it twitches and shakes, just as desperate as him.
âLook at that,â he mutters darkly, eyes glued to where heâs laid his cock flat against your stomach, leaking pre-come all over your soft skin. âHowâs it gonna fit, baby?â He shifts his hips, sawing his length back and forth to see just how deep in you heâll be.
Your glassy eyes drop, a broken moan passing through your slack lips when you take in the sight. Your hips rise off the bed, grinding your cunt along the seam of his heavy balls, along the prominent vein trailing up the underside.
âDonât worry, baby,â Logan grits out, eyes hooded and dark as he watches you grind against him. âYouâre gonna take it all. Gonna make you feel every last fuckinâ bit of me.â
He groans, gritting his teeth as he presses in further, each inch a battle against the tight, molten heat that grips him like a vice. Your body shudders as he fills you, your slick warmth pulling him deeper and deeper, and he sinks down until heâs fully seated, his hips flush with yours.Â
The pressure is mind-numbing, your walls clenching around him in rhythmic pulses that make his vision blur. He stills for just a second, savoring the way your body stretches around him, hugging him in a way that feels like it was made for him alone.
Logan watches your face as you adjust to the stretch, your brows pinched together, each breath coming fast and shallow, your eyes glazed with pleasure.
Then, your hands come to his shoulders, nails digging little crescent moons into his skin as you nod your head, ready.
Itâs all the confirmation he needs. His hips pull back before he slams in again, the force of it jolting your whole body. He presses his forehead to your shoulder, teeth bared as he muffles a snarl against your skin.
Logan thrusts again, and again, and again, hips setting a merciless pace as he watches the way your breasts bounce with each thrust, each little shudder.
His mouth waters with the need to taste, to sink his teeth into your supple skin hard enough to pierce clean through, hard enough to scar.
Sweat drips down the length of his spine, across his brow. It mats down the hair scattered over his chest, his dog tags slick with it when they bounce off his skin with each thrust. The grip of his hands tightens on your hips, itâs taking everything in him to hold back and yet he knows youâll still bruise tomorrow.Â
Pretty hues of dark purples and yellows in the shape of his fingers, ones heâll catch you admiring in the bathroom mirror, pressing your own fingertips into them to feel the dull acheâto remember this moment.
âMade for this, arenât you?â he rasps, his voice dark and possessive. âMade to take me, to be mine.â
The words barely leave his mouth before heâs bending down to capture your lips in a searing kiss, swallowing your cries as he drives into you, pushing you both closer to that sweet edge.
âFuck, Logan,â you gasp, breaking the kiss as your body trembles under him. âCanâah!âcan feel you in my stomachâŠâ
Your hand drops from his shoulder, slipping between your bodies to rest over the sweaty expanse of your belly. Loganâs eyes follow your path, a feral growl bursting from his chest before he can stop it.
Heâs transfixed by it, sure that if he pressed his hand to the soft skin of your lower stomach right over your own, that heâd feel it. Feel the way his cock punches up against your insides, so deep it's like heâs rearranging your guts to make room.
âFuck.â His voice is nothing but a gravelly rumble, hoarse and dark as midnight. His hips speed up impossibly faster, chasing the feeling of your clenching walls choking the length of his cock so tight he thinks it might snap off at the base.
The flimsy headboard of your bed slams against the wall, creaky mattress springs screaming under his ministrations.
You feel like salvation, like the first rays of light after too many years spent in the dark.
He feels it with each kiss of his cock against your cervix, in the way your lips fit in the junction of his neck, in the red welts your nails leave on the skin of his back. He feels alive, truly alive, for the first time in decades.
âSay my name,â he grates, his hand cupping the back of your neck, coaxing you to look up at him, lips close enough to taste the heat radiating from his skin. âTell me who you belong to.â
"Logan," you gasp, your voice breathy, edged with desperation as he pushes you closer to the brink. "Yours. Only yours."
A broken, shaky noise falls from his lips as he buries his face in your neck. He mouths at your skin desperately, presses his nose to where your scent is the strongest.Â
Flashes of his release spraying your insides play behind his closed eyes, thoughts of drenching you so thoroughly that it has to take only forcing his hips to slam against the rippling muscle of your ass like you have your own magnetic pull. He feels it building, the slow swell of his knot presses against your folds, ready to burst.
âCome on, honey,â he begs, thumb coming down to rub slow circles over your slick clit. âCome with me, soak my cock. Show me how much you love it, how much you love me.â
Pathetic little uh uh uhâs fall from you with every thrust, broken up only by the breathy whines of his name as he pounds into you hard enough to push your body higher up the mattress. Finally, with a loud roar, he stuffs his growing knot inside of your cunt.Â
Loganâs teeth sink into your neck before he can even think twice about it, the thick spray of his come filling you as his hands pull your hips down even further over his cock. He needs to be as deep in you as possible, to press forward until he canât anymore, until his aching balls are flush with your gushing cunt.
He watches with rapt attention as you come with a loud wail, just from the feeling of his knot slotting into place. The clamp of your thighs over his hips is nearly as tight as the way your cunt seizes around him like itâs scared heâll leave.
He groans at the over stimulation of your cunt milking his cock. Your slick leaks around the base of him, your shaking hole plugged so full it can only slip along the creamy ring to splash weakly against his thighs and hips.
Logan licks along the spot where his teeth pierced your skin, planting one last kiss before heâs taking you in his arms and rolling onto his back atop the mattress. The plush comforter sticks to his skin, your own sweaty body slipping against his as he tries his best to not jostle you too much while keeping you stuffed full of his cock.
He holds you to his chest until your breathing evens out, until your body stops trembling on top of his, until youâre nosing along the column of his neck.
âLogan?â Your voice is tiny, hoarse and scratchy. He feels your hand drawing absent minded shapes along the skin of his stomach. A circle, a star, a figure eight, a heart.
âYeah baby?â he says, pressing his lips to the crown of your head, eyes slipping shut at the content feeling that spreads through him.
âLove you,â you murmur, voice soft but sure, the words slipping out without hesitation.
Itâs the first time youâve said it today, and hearing those three words from you sends warmth flooding through him.
Logan shifts slightly, pulling you even closer, his hand moving to the back of your head, cradling you with a kind of tenderness he used to think heâd never be capable of. âI love you too, darlinâ. More than you know.â
Your body relaxes against him, the lingering effects of your shared intimacy still buzzing through your limbs, but now thereâs a sense of peace, of safety, and a deeper connection.
He can feel the way your fingers curl lightly against his skin, the quiet smile that must be tugging at your lips as you press a kiss to the side of his neck.
And in that moment, with everything settled around him, Logan knows that this, right here, is everything.
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#â đŻđąđ”đąđđȘđą đžđłđȘđ”đŠđŽ âĄ#áŻâ
đ§đđ'đŹ đ©đđ«đŹđšđ§đđ„ đ„đšđ đđ§ đĄđšđ°đ„đđđ!#natalia cant write anything under 1.000 words#DON'T LOOK AT ME#maybe i'm starting my period soon#idfk#match my freak y'all#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x you#logan howlett fic#logan howlett imagine#logan howlett smut#wolverine x reader#wolverine x you#wolverine fic#wolverine imagine#wolverine smut#x men x reader#x men smut#marvel x reader#marvel smut#mcu x reader#mcu smut
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đđąđŻđąđ„ đđđ§đđ„đđ đđđ§đŹđąđšđ§ | s. gojĆ + s. ryĆmen
đđČđ§đšđ©đŹđąđŹ: Three powerful empires, two childhood companions, and one you. What is supposed to be a peaceful alliance is slowly turning into a rocky relationship between royal friends...Is there any way you can save it?
đđšđ§đđđ§đđŹ: Gojo + true form! Sukuna x fem! reader - explicit content; minors DNI - royal-like + fantasy AU! - porn with plot - Gojo + reader is age 28 + Sukuna is older; mid-30s - mutual pining + confessions - size differences - threesome - double penetration; anal & vaginal - virginity loss - fingering (f! receiving) - back-to-chest + cowgirl dp positions - clitoral play - cerfix-fucking - overstimulation - unprotected sex (psa: wrap it up, or get tf up) - pet names (baby, cutie, dove, human, little one, pet, sweetie) - marriage proposals - cameos: Utahime and Miwa - Gojo and Sukuna can't stand each other, obvi - humor + drama - mention of drool, blood, spit and tears - will be proofread later.
đđšđ«đ đđšđźđ§đ: 15.4k words (BRUH, i hate it here.)
đđźđđĄđšđ«'đŹ đđšđđ: aight, after 10 whole months, it's FINALLY dropped! this took foreverrrr, ughhhh. anyways, sorry for the long wait, hope you enjoy this one, and thanks again for 11.2k starlings, ilysmmm!! ââ
ââŠâ
âây LadyâŠMy Lady!â
âHuh?â You blink and face the door where the voice is coming from. âOh, Iâm sorry, Utahime. You can come in.â
âJeez, I was knocking for a whole minute.â Your lady-in-waiting, Utahime, closes the door behind her when entering your chambers, walking up to where you were sitting by the mirror. âAnd I thought I told you to refer to me by my last name, my Lady.â
You smile at the reflection of the other coming behind you, kneeling and readying the iron basin filled with warm water and rose petals. Her hand and the washcloth swish the surface for the floral scents to enter your nostrils. âWell, weâve been friends for how long? Iâve referred to you by your first name for all my life, even before you became my handmaiden.â
âHmph, even then,â Utahime scoffs before taking your feet and dipping them in the warm water. âYou donât see me dare call the sole, precious child of this empireâs greatest warrior by their given name.â
âNo, but I always tell you I donât mind. Besides, you usually do it when weâre alone, and thatâs enough for me.â
âIf thatâs what makes my Lady hapââ
âIt does.â You look at her with a pleasant aura, and the dark-haired one snickers before straining the washcloth.Â
âAs you wishâŠY/n.â You puff your chest with satisfaction; however, your handmaiden isnât done talking, âBut I know the matter of my name isnât something thatâs having you lost in your thoughts.â Her observation takes you slightly aback, and her brown orbs peer up to capture your attention. âWould you like to tell me whatâs corrupting your mind?â
With a heavy sigh, your back touches the chair as you slouch. Your eyes glance to the open window as the blinds drift gently with the calm wind. The swaying motions of the curtains almost convince your stress to wither away along with the quietness. Almost.
âUtahime,â you begin with her name, still facing the window. ââŠWhat do you think about Lord Satoru Gojo?â
âTch,â you didnât have to turn to know that the woman had the most disgusted expression, the click of her teeth was telling. âWhat is there to think?â
âHehe, well, weâve known each other since we could walkââ
âYeah, and â pardon me, my Lady â but that bastard is such a nuisance, even if he just became the crowned heir of the Gojo bloodline and the holder of the Six Eyes.â The dark-haired woman scrubs your feet with vigor, but you donât say anything, containing your laughter. âThat manâugh! Every time he visits the palace, he will never stop teasing me for deciding to leave my family and become your lady-in-waiting. Who does he think he is!â
The laugh you try to hinder seeps out in hushed giggles. âWellâahemâwhat about Lord Ryomen?â
Utagime stops her hand and washcloth between your toes, her face in your direction. Both brows trenched with a thin line of her mouth. ââŠâŠAs of recentâŠScaryâno, intimidating would be an understatement...my Lady, perhaps the visit and stay of the two lords is what have you down?â
Another heavy sigh, âI guess that would be the caseâŠâ
You reside in the founding empire of the great continent. In the ancient past, it is said that the Great Saint Tengen came from the heavens and blessed this world with miracles, living in the country that youâre standing in right now. It was said that Tengen was the benevolent child of Gods and the Parent of Beings who graced everyone â both human and non â with compassion, kindness, and love through their sorcery. When they disappeared, the world fell into a divide, their people sticking amongst themselves while following the teachings and words of Saint Tengen.
As the centuries came following this tale, the countries of this world have maintained a relatively peaceful union. However, the main continent â your continent â is home to three major empires: the North, the East, and the West. As mentioned before, you live in the founding Western nation, also known as the homeland of Tengen.Â
You are a royal of this land and the sole heir to the throne right after your father, a mighty war soldier and sorcerer respected by his people and allies. As the crowned king of the Western capital, your father has done his job in using his strong leadership to maintain a functional structure for the people, using his wisdom to tread on matters with a tranquil mind, and making decisions that would not only benefit his own people but also his allies. Sometimes, you forget that such a great man could be your father. Yet his undying love for you, his sole child and princess, proves how lucky you are.
In the Northern Lands above are known as the land of Sorcery. Your father may be a powerful sorcerer, but the empire he rules does not harbor the majority of the population who practice sorcery (or lack thereof). That would go to the snowy Northern Empire, a land where many of Tengenâs scholars and practitioners have come from and implemented their teachings. The current head of this nation is bestowed to the affluent House Gojo, who recently crowned their heir after the death of its late king. Satoru Gojo, the first royal after a century gifted with two of the most intense abilities made by Saint Tengen â the Six Eyes and Limitless â sits on the Northern throne. And is also a dear family friend.
To the East lies a country mostly comprised of harsh deserts and dangerous forests, filled with creatures that arenât of the human imagination. Once referred to as the land of âTengenâs True Children,â the eastern empire is known worldwide as the Demon Country. Creatures reside in this part, beings that can easily overpower the average human â or worse, kill. They are ruled by the King of Demons, Sukuna Ryomen. As the scariest, cold-hearted, and violent beast of the empire, Sukuna is regarded as Tengenâs âFallen Star,â a soul that embodies the precise opposite nature of the saint. And yet, this brutal master is also a cherished companion in the company of you and your father.
âWhat about their visits seems to make you upset?â Utahime lifts the bottom of your nightgown to scrub further up, the warm, damp towel scraping the skin of your left femur.Â
âI donât knowâŠI suppose itâs because things are different than a decade and a half ago.â It was one way of speaking the truth.
âWhy, of course, things would be different now. You expect Iâd be looking after a tiny heir all my life?â She giggles. âAlthough, that would be quite nice.â
âOh, to be young forever would be a treat, wouldnât it?â You add on to her humor. âYet, thatâs not what I meant. Itâs been so long since the three of us been in this palace together â let alone in any space together. The War of the Blood and Magic has been ongoing for years now. Whenever my father wishes to speak with them about an issue, one must be here while the other is in their respective territory.âÂ
âMmm, I have observed thatâŠBut still, even with this war going on, it shouldnât negate the fact that you three have been friends for so long. I still remember the day young Gojo came to the garden where you and I were making flower crowns.â
You smile at the memory. âI remember how upset you were when he grabbed my hand one day and took us to his guest room to show his Limitless.â
You try your hardest to keep in your laughter when she glares up at you â not at you, but at the recollection instead. âThat fool, even as a child, knows nothing of boundaries. He was a bright boy â still is, Iâll give him that. But my Gods, the way he would do everything in his power to impress you was so cocky of a young lord, especially in the presence of the next heir to the continent. The nerve of himâŠAnd then! The time he had the nerve to question me when I told you I wanted to be your handmaiden. That little blue-eyed weasel said, âYou? The daughter of a mediocre house, as the princessâ personal maid? You should try and aim lower or marry someone whoâd tolerate your un-ladylike attitude.â I was too stunned to speakâŠI shouldâve choked his ass out!âÂ
ââPfffthahaha, stop, youâre scrubbing too hard!â You halt your lady-in-waiting with stiffened giggles, the poor woman sighing for displaying such aggression unbefitting for her title. âYou could never stand him, and to think I thought you had a crush on him.âÂ
âPlease, my Lady, never say that aloud, or else my father would try to make my worst nightmare become reality.â She shakes her head, putting your left leg into the basin and switching to the right.Â
âAnd the day I introduced you as my maid to him, you had the smugest smirk that couldnât be wiped off that night.â
âYouâre goddamn right, my Lady!â That coarse remark had the both of you in a fit of cackles, water damn near splashing out as you wiggle your legs. âAhhhh, but those were the days. I believe Lord Ryomen came into the picture after that. I remember the first day your father accepted the young demon kingâs wish to seek an audience; he was a bit shorter than his current eight-foot-tall stature. Four arms were tiny like a teenager, and his,â she waves a hand up and down over the left side of her face. âThis was distinguishable.â
You hum along with the description of the once young teenage demon king. âHis human mother died during childbirth, and his father a demon who was exorcised for impregnating the poor woman. He was the first hybrid sorcerer of his time to utilize sorcery with the dark techniques of demon arts, becoming the most powerful and making a name for himself in the Eastern empire. He was alongside my father during the Great Demon War, using his powers to take down opposing cursed forces from outside nations. The two earned each otherâs respect â more on my fatherâs part.â
âThat, he wasâŠtruly a hard one to read, outside of always looking like heâd cut something out of boredom. I worried for the day heâd catch sight of me looking at him the wrong way and slice my throat,â the mere thought of the deadly beingâs scowl was enough to send goosebumps up Utahimeâs way. âEven the spars he had with your father and Gojo, Iâm amazed to see this palace still standing in one piece.â
âHehe, imagine how I felt when heâd catch me watching and then pull me aside to train with him â not asking, demanding that he teaches me how to wield a weapon.â
âOhhh, my Lady, my nerves were never calm whenever he instructed you. Fearing for your life was my biggest sport. He couldnât stand the fact that the sole heir of the greatest warrior didnât have the drive to wield and charge.â She places your other leg down, rinsing the washcloth with more water before asking for your right arm. âItâs not like your father ever dared to entertain the thought of you entering battle anyway! That man, truly a scary thingâŠâ
You throw your head back, resting it on the rail of the chair. âFor my eighteenth year, he gifted me my own sword â handmade and light for my hands.â
âMen.â Utahime shakes her head once again. âYet, despite how odd he and Gojo are, they seemed at ease whenever you were around. Whether it be visits from them to discuss with the King or attending events here at the palace, those two acted a lot moreâŠcalm.âÂ
Her observations stuck with you, closing your eyes to think more. âI only wonder if we could revert to those days when we were close. Unfortunately, with this current war between the two, this vision is impossible to imagineâŠ.â
You and the two lords have been friends for years â decades, even. And you were no fool; it was apparent that this relationship would dwell into something less familiar once the two become distant. And the war between the two empires proves this statement trueâŠ
It was your twenty-fourth year when you heard the news of the War of Blood and Magic. A year prior, an incident in the northern empire occurred where a sorcerer and his company were butchered by invading demons. Enraged, many men would go down to the demon continent to pillage and exorcise demon villages and towns as a form of justice. However, it only sparked the increasing tension between the factions into a conflict past the phase of talk and civilized words.Â
Taking matters into his own hands, Sukuna found the men responsible for the rampage and had their bodies sliced within seconds, sending their bloody, severed heads back to the North as his declaration of war. In the coming years after that, there was nothing but ongoing bloodshed between the two; every battle and atrocity shared with your father made you squeamish â not just because of the brutality, but also the loss of Sukuna and Gojoâs relationship with every passing day. Â
It made you feel sick â powerless in wanting the two to remember their merciful ways and talk like men. But you knew that was child's play â the time for miracles and fairy tales vanished with Tengen. And now, as the fourth year of this constant battle between humans and demons of this continent shows no signs of stopping, your worrying nature is on edge more than ever.Â
âIt may seem impossible to imagine, but it doesnât mean itâs not worth the execution,â Utahimeâs voice rings you back to the present, alternating to your left arm to wipe before dismissing herself from the night. âIâm sure your father believes that as well; otherwise, he wouldnât have invited the two here for the first time in four years. I think he and all the people of this empire grow worrisome for the fate of this continent if all thatâll be left is a clash between two factions.â
âThat may be true,â yet your tone was somber. âBut if he canât convince his two trusted allies to cease this fight, then Iâm afraid thereâs nothing we can do but see who comes out victorious. And Iâd hate to see one stand and the other down in a pool of their bloodâŠâ
Utahime hums and lets the silence take over for a few seconds. And then she speaks again, ââŠ.Maybe, if not your father, then you should be the one to bring the two together.â Â
Me? âMe?â
âYes, my Lady. You may be the princess of the greatest warrior, but you are also the dear friend of his allies. Your word means law to them â they trust your input when asked and see you as a perfect successor in line.â Â
âBut thatâs just based on titles and old conversations that donât hold up to the nowâŠOut of the three of us, I was the one who stayed put in this castle while the others played dirty, severing limbs and creating craters on this sacred continent. We are not children anymore, yet I feel like the one whoâs still a naive babe with hands clean.âÂ
âNow that is not true, my Lady!â Fierce brown eyes bore to you. âJust because you donât have blood on your hands doesnât make you unfit as a leader. You are the sole child of the King of the Western Empire, the land that Tengen once slept and walked on. That makes you the one next in line after your father.â
âThat is my stated birthrightââ
âAnd so!â You held your tongue; she was not done yet. âYou have proven that birthright true from what youâve done so far. I can count on my hands and toes all the times your father came to you for advice on a matter that didnât sit right with him, knowing that your wisdom and compassion aid your judgment. And letâs not forget how youâve kept a neutral stance on this issue thus far, knowing itâs the best and safest option for your father and his people. You are his child, after allâŠWhat Iâm saying is that people change. And that goes the same for you; youâve become a face I can trust and depend on, and Iâm glad to have the right to watch over you until you see fit.âÂ
You knew she meant every word, so you kept silent for her to finish.
âSo, I say this with all the genuineness in my heart. I believe you can smack some sense up those twoâs minds. You are the princess, but you are a friend above all else. Lord Gojo had just arrived today, leaving Lord Ryomen on his way in three days' time. Express to them how you feel, that you wish for nothing but an end to this bloodshed and to restore whateverâs left to rebuild their past alliance.â
There was nothing wrong with her words; everything was well-spoken with a perspicuous style and valid points. She was your closest friend â no one knew you better than she did. So, thereâs no reason to try and find whatever flawed construct that was in her argument.Â
Finally, after she was done dapping your arm with the washcloth and drying your feet after taking them out of the metal basin, you smiled. âPerhaps youâre right.â
âOf course, Iâm right; Iâm your best friend!â Utahime stands with a puffed chest filled with pride, picking up the basin by the handles. âAnd as the right one, I reckon you should turn in for the night. Leave this matter for tomorrow so the solution youâre looking for will be easier to find.â
âMmm, your advice is well-received like always.â You stand from the chair, stretching your limbs. When she approaches your door, you bid your handmaiden farewell for the night, âSee you in the morning, Utahime.âÂ
With a wink, she parts before shutting the door, âSleep well and tight, my Lady.â
The warm presence of your friend is missed now that youâre alone in your room. The candles around your chambers exhibit a warm glow that should make you feel safe, but that wasnât the case today. Even after your night routine, the cold still resided in your skin. You sigh again through your nostrils; the invisible weight on your shoulders makes it impossible to lift them.
You turn back to your mirror â your reflection brings up the conversation with your best friend minutes ago. Examining your features, placing your hand on your cheek to sense your skin, alone with your thoughts. Did I really change that much? Your face tilts to the side, but the different angle doesnât seem to help give a proper answer. HmmâŠPerhaps itâs something Iâm not supposed to see.Â
With a yawn, you stand straight again, deciding to take up Utahimeâs advice and retire for the night. You face your queen-sized bed, anticipating your figure sinking into the soft, comfortable mattress.Â
What you didnât anticipate was releasing a big gasp when turning to your bedding, your body going rigid, and your blood stopping circulation.Â
âHey.â
Something was sitting on your bed. No, someone was on your bed. And judging by the deep, guttural timbre of their voice, you are familiar with this person.Â
You turned to your left once you heard a word. A figure was coming into the lighted room from the dark of the balcony â a giant, no, ginormous figure. Based on the height, he was inches from touching the entrance frame, way taller than any royal youâve ever met â or, at least, any human royal youâve ever seen. Â
The body was broad and could engulf you even from ten steps away. Four burly arms protrude from the torso, and black nails that resemble claws match the black tattoos painted on his shoulders, biceps and triceps, wrists, back, and chest. The markings also reside on the right of his face thatâs morphed with another, which holds four red eyes instead of two, along with earrings that stretch his big earlobes. Aside from his bloody orbs, one thing that contrasts his appearance is the rusty salmon color of his hair. And that was the first thing you saw â the first thing that had your mind recollect him.
âLord Ryomen.â His name didnât feel proper to say. Itâs been almost a year since you last saw him, but he was still the same brutal man youâve heard about all this timeâŠyet a companion of yours nonetheless. âFather told me you would be here in two days. How did youââ
âYou know Iâm not one to wait.â He crossed his lower arms, the upper ones covered by a black robe that matched the black hakama pants he wore. âEspecially when it comes to visiting this place.â
âAnd of Uraume?â The mention of the demon kingâs trusted adviser quirks his brow. âIs it okay to leave them alone without you to watch over?â
âYou think Iâm weak on my own?â
âNâNo, of course not!â You were quick to refute â you had to be when it came to him. âItâs just that I would feel bad; theyâd worry about where you are.â
âAnd here you are worrying about them worrying about me. Hmph, humans,â he scoffs, and the mouth on his stomach grins. âUraume knows to look after the ship when Iâm gone or be my eyes when Iâm not around. Iâm not a child that needs protecting.â
You bow to him. âOf course you arenât, my Lord. Forgive me for having you think as such.â
He hums, tilting his head while examining you. âGood. Lift your head.â You do as youâre told, watching him take a few steps closer to you. âItâs cold; why is your fire not set?â
You look at what heâs referring to, seeing that your fireplace harbored no flame. âI told my maids that I would be fine tonight without it, the heavy blankets will doââ
Your eyes travel back to Sukuna, only to see he isnât where he stood. He vanished, nowhere in your room to be found. You turned behind, but he wasnât there either. But once you heard heavy feet thunder on your floor again, you spun around to see the beast carrying four logs, one in each hand. You were marveled; you only heard talk of his speed, now it was a little scary seeing the real deal.
Sukuna bends down in front of your fireplace, setting the logs down perfectly. âIgnoring the coldâs existence is an ignorant game. A princess should be warm during this time of night.â Once the logs are set, he makes a sign with his upper right hand, bringing his thumb and forefinger together to his mouth. He blows, and a string of fire spits out to the logs. The sound of crackling bark from the flames confirms his work. âYou are not me; you should fear the cold.â
You nod to his lesson. âThank you, Lord Ryomen.âÂ
âThereâs no one here. You have the right to refer to me by my first name.â Sukuna straightens himself up. The light from the fire has his face aglow, and the crimson in his eyes flicker while they hook onto you.
You donât know why â maybe it was because of the instant heat touching your neck instead of the sudden allurement youâve noted from the demon king. Regardless, you avert your gaze downward. âYes, Lord Sukuna.â
âHmm.â He croons, walking towards you to prompt your chin up with a hand. Your eyes widen at his action; this is the first time in forever since heâs laid a hand on you. Talks of those he touches die shortly after spark in your mind. âYou still have the sword.â
It wasnât a question â an observation. He noticed the weapon lodged above the fireplace, like a memento meant to be honored rather than used. You smile, âYes, I make sure itâs nice and clean from dust.âÂ
Sukuna scoffs. âI give you a present, and you treat it like a trophy.âÂ
âIt would be wise to treat a gift from the demon king like a treasure. It wouldnât sit right with me knowing I used or damaged a present given to me by someone I care about.âÂ
He tilted his head again. âAnd when I give a weapon to someone I wish to protect,â The word caught you off guard. Protect? âI expect them to use it as itâs intended. I will allow it this time, but I wonât be too forgiving the second. Understood?â
You heard him, but your mind was still wrapped around the word. Protect? Lord Sukuna wants to protect me? What for?? You didnât mean to say it aloud; it just slipped. âProtect?â
His mood shifts into neutral. A subtle softness is displayed in that inhuman structure of a face â or maybe you imagined it because of the late hour. Your breath hitches when you feel his lower hands pull and wrap around your right hand; the way your palm dwarfs in his hold is appalling. And then he kneels. Sukuna, the eight-foot-tall demon king, kneeling before you. This was a bizarre night, candidly.Â
âPrincess,â he starts with your name. It was the perfect method as he fully has your undivided attention. âYou know why the King has wished to see me despite whatâs occurring outside these chambers. He believes there is still room to talk, and I believe he's wasting his time because I'm close to setting the entire Northern front ablaze and nailing this score for good.âÂ
You knew he meant that, and it scared you because if he really could, he would. He actually possesses the mentality and the drive to do it. And yet, all three parts of the continent continue to stand. Why?
âBut that would result in more problems for me. Iâd have the entire world after my head for terrorism. All the leaders will not rest until Iâm gone â your father would have to come put me down. And I would kill him, all of them.â His eyes were on you, dead serious. ââŠBut that would make you upset, and it pisses me off that you'd hate me for my drive for survival.âÂ
âMy Lord,â it was your turn to speak. âI wouldnât hate you. Being upset would be justified. But when it comes to war, survival is the paramount destination. I only wish to avoid such significant losses â both for the people of our nations and the people I hold dear.âÂ
âMmm.â He took your words. Thereâs no need to say anything, knowing Sukuna heard your piece is good enough. âI can see where you stand in this, stubborn and naive like your father. So, I come to you with a proposition. Something I need for you to listen before I consider seizing this battle.â
The way he spoke had you on edge, truthfully. Yet, if heâs coming to you in the middle of the night to hear your piece, who are you as a friend to push him aside? You give him a nod, âYes, my Lord?âÂ
âPrincess, I want toââ he stops mid-sentence, his pink-slitted brow suddenly drew up before it furrowed at the next second. He lets go of your hand in a hurry, standing up in a flash. It had you squeak. âHeâs here.â
The sudden change in tone had you blink up at the giant, startled. âWhâWho?â
ââŠ.No, they will not be seeing you. The hour is late; they are heading for bed!â
âOh, câmon Utahime â an hour, give me one hour!â
âDonât you DARE open that doorâHEY!âÂ
You and Sukunaâs eyes dart to your chamber door, which opens with an abrupt vigor as if it was kicked open â it was kicked. The foot that was prominent at the front goes down and swings in a figure that brightens the area. Baggy white paints contrast with a black dress shirt mixed with white, intricate, and alluring designs. Subtle blue patterns map around the black collar and cuffs, dancing down the white material behind gold buttons. Itâs covered by an ocean-blue shawl that drapes the figureâs left side. But the most significant detail that gave away who the person was â outside of their voice alone â was the snow-shite hair that decorated the top of his head.Â
Your wide eyes take in the person before you, and a dainty smile comes to your lips when you say his name. Unlike Sukuna, who sucks his teeth with a deep scowl. âLord Gojo, itâsââ
âPRINCESS~~!â Chipper as ever, Gojo greets you with a happy tune that is so familiar to the ears. His sky-blue eyes gleam and narrow whenever heâs in your presence, just like heâd do during your childhood years. âGlad to see that Iâll be able to see your beautiful face tonight, after all. And I thought I told you to call me by my first name, like when we were kids!â
His jest has you giggle, âAnd I thought Iâd told you from the last visit to knock on my door before entering. You have my poor handmaiden chasing after you at this hour.âÂ
âI second that notion wholeheartedly, my Lady.â Utahime comes into view, approaching from Gojoâs shadow. If looks could kill, sheâd stab Gojoâs throat with dual-wielding daggers. Not that the white-haired man was paying her glare any mind. She sighs heavily before bowing to you, âMy apologies, my Lady. Lord Gojo caught me leaving the stairs towards your hall, figuring heâd come to speak a word withâHoly Tengen!â Your lady-in-waiting gasps when she lifts her head to see that you arenât alone in the first place. âL-Lord Ryomen!? F-F-Forgive me for not noticing your grace before.â She quickly returns her head for a bow, hoping the trusty, short right-hand retainer and advisor, Uraume, wasnât here to lecture her.Â
But thankfully to her anxious stars, the demon king grunts, âYouâve been forgiven, human. I came here not too long ago to discuss matters with the heir.â His red eyes leave the bowing woman to look at Gojo, whose lighthearted cadence is stilled. âAlone.â The final word was all for the white-haired lordâs watch to switch to a silent, menacing tone, shaded by his bangs but perfectly seen by Sukuna.Â
âYes, my Lord, I shall leave you two to yourselves then,â Utahime replies to the salmon-haired creature, lifting her upper body ready for dismissal. But she then grabs for Gojoâs arm and tugs. âThat includes you as well, Lord Gojo.âÂ
âEhhhh, me? What about the giant freak across from me?â Gojo questions the woman who pulls him to the doorway. âI also have things to discuss with the princess Iâve expressed earlier for when I have the time, which is now. At least I made my appointment known. Unlike him, who came into their quarters unannounced.âÂ
âAnd here you are, barging into their room!â she almost popped a vein; you worry for the poor woman dragging the tall figure out of your room. âKicking their door and making yourself known doesnât modify the definition of being unannounced. Come back tomorrow â Iâm sure my Lady will be available to listen to your quarrels then.âÂ
It was now that you finally decided to interject. âItâs all right, Utahime. Sleep still evades me for me to rest.â You look to Sukuna, his gaze already on your figure, and then to Gojo, who awaits your assertion. ââŠI will listen to both Lords and have them dismissed before I retire for the night. You may let Lord Gojo go now and get sleep yourself.âÂ
Utahime gives you a concerned look, yet she silently lets go of the man when you give her a tiny nod. âAs you wish. Have a good night, my princess. Lord Sukuna. Gojo.â She slams the door at the last name she says, her stomping footsteps and grumbling curses fading into the night.Â
And now here you were, alone in your room, with the two lords of two superpower empires â two childhood friends. Nevertheless, itâs back. The suffocating tension youâve mentioned before returns and drapes over the three of you that the word âfriendâ feels teeny within it. You canât lie to yourself; youâre weary to have either of them in your chambers, let alone be in the same space as you. You knew there would be a day when the two would come together; however, you were far from being prepared for said event.Â
Then again, itâs better now than never, right? You three used to be the best of friends â close companions that you could depend on and trust. Close companions that you desperately wish to continue trusting and having an unbreakable bond with. If not for you, then for your fatherâs and respective empiresâ sake. So, with a deep breath, you exhale and think of how to go about this predicament. Be the heir that your father raised you to be.
âSo,â You turn to Gojo to start with. âLord Gojoââ
âOh, câmooon, what did I say about using my last name?â Gojo flashes a quick smile at you. âWeâre friends, no? Itâs not fair you refer to Maiden Iori by her first name; you should know mine like the back of your hand!â
His little pester does help swade a bit of stress off your shoulders. âMy apologies, Satoru. Itâs just that I must be respectful to my royals, even if we are long-time friends.â
The white-haired man chuckles, taking steps to be closer to you. âEven so, I want my princess to call me by my name, for you are the one I trust and hold dear the most. And I donât want our familiarity to be tarnished by titles.âÂ
ââŠIf thatâs what will make you happy, Satoru.â The address to the northern prince made you avert your gaze to the ground, and your cheeks dial in warmth. Who knew that he thought so deeply about a little gesture? And then thereâs what he referred to you asâ
âYour princess?â Sukunaâs voice snaps you back to the present situation: you and Gojo are not the only ones in your room. Â
Gojo takes his eyes off you and places them on the giant behind your shape. He taunts, âYes, my princess, as they are the fair heir of this great empire who will rule after their great father. Iâd say they are as much my princess to me as the other Lords and Maidens. But Iâd be lying since I see them as more than that.â
Sukunaâs quadruple eyes darken as they narrow at the man before him. âEvery time I see your scrawny self, you prove youâre the biggest fool than all the other senile jokes of Lords Iâve ever dealt with.â Two steps is all he takes to be right behind you. You can practically feel his shadow on you. âThe person before us is indeed a royal above many â above you. So, I find it amusing that you would be dumb enough to emphasize such a ludicrous claim. You fail to know your place when in their presence. And in mine.â
Oh, that ticked something inside Gojo. Because the prince was no longer smiling, his attention was wholly on Sukuna. Many wouldnât dare to glower at the giant creature the way Gojo was â let alone look at him. âHah, you sure know how to make unfunny jokes, Sukuna. Because Iâd rather eat demon shit than have you think for a moment that you are above me.â
âHmph, Iâm surprised your childish behavior has gotten you this far,â you can see from the shadow on the floor that Sukuna folds his lower arms. âDonât think that youâll be lucky with me.â
âOh, believe me, my childish manner has gotten its fair share of tongue lashings and trouble, but Iâve been able to talk my ass out of shit ever since I was a kid. But I guess talk is too cheap for an oversized brute like you, huh?â
âVery. Iâm a being of actionââ
âAction? Or destruction?â The light blue of Gojoâs eyes shifts to that of a deep, cold shade under his bangs, with no sign of backing down. âBecause from all Iâve heard about you, everything can crumble beneath you with just a swipe of the fingers. Outside of your lands, whoâs to say youâre worthy of ruling when your methods and policy are more forbidding than mine? Or better yet, who gave you the gall to think that such a monster like you has a right to even be amongst civil people like me and the princess? Hell, the fact that you snuck in their room as you please sickens me to the core.â
âI can say the same for you, Satoru Gojo. Your entire occupancy does worse than bore me. Standing here with the man governing the family whoâs killed many of my kin and demons fills me with inextinguishable anger. You have no idea how much excitement Iâll have for the day I cut that head of yours clean off, but because of my business with the princess, your death will be pending.âÂ
âNot if my business is taken care of first.â
The demon growls. âLike hell, it will.âÂ
âMy Lords, please!â
The tense atmosphere is relieved by the abruption of your voice, bringing the lordsâ quarrel to a standstill to face you. You squeak when their eyes land on you, forcing yourself to turn to the fireplace and deal with the growing storm of anxiousness inside you.Â
Gods, I shouldâve had Utahime here with me! You curse yourself for being in this situation. Why tonight of all nights must you deal with this? It was as if your lady-in-waiting had this all planned â or worse, your father, having you treat the matter of your allies. You groan internally to your hands, letting your frustration be released.
You twirl back to face the two men before you, a deep inhale before saying, âLord Satoru, what would you like to discuss with me at this hour?â
âHah?â The disapproving mood of the demon king had your heart sink to the floor. âI was here first.â
âYes, you came to my room first tonight. But Gojo was here first at the palace. He told me earlier that he wanted to speak, so I should hear him.â You could only hope your reasoning satisfied the tall being, who puffs his tattooed chest. And Gojo quickly flashed the other a vexatious look at Sukuna before you pivoted to him. âNow, Lord Goââ
âAht aht!â
ââŠLord Satoru,â He beams a big grin. âWhat do you wish to speak with me?â
âWell, although this is something meant for the two of us,â meant to be a stab to the other person in the room, who couldnât care less about his presence being unwanted. âBut thisâll suffice; it doesnât hurt to have an audience.â You watch the silver-haired man take your left hand, the rough pad of his thumb rubbing on your knuckles.Â
âMy Lady,â he looks at you with delicate azure eyes, his gaze so captivating that it locks you in position. âIâve known you for quite a long time. Before I met you, my life as a royal was barren. Nothing sparked joy in me. The mundane tasks to uphold as the next heir, being pampered and sheltered as the gifted member of the Gojo House. I felt trapped in a mold â a mold that I resented having as my birthright, so much so that I wished to claw my eyes out at the age of five.âÂ
You could tell he was speaking from the heart, his hands gripping yours tighter.
âBut then, three years later, my father took me to meet the King of the western lands; at the time, it sounded like such a chore having to meet all these old, disgusting guys that I had to âmaintain a good relationshipâ with. And then, like the sun peeking through dark clouds, I saw you. Iâve met many royal kids before me, most snobby or kissing up to me for my good graces. Yet, none of them have been as alluring and breathtaking as you have been.â He pauses for a light chuckle. âI can still remember how your sweet voice addressed me when our fathers introduced us together. You stood tight to his leg, but your grace was ever present.â
âMhmm, and I recall how angry your father was when you didnât take a knee and instead greeted me with a handshake.â The two of you share a laugh, unaware of the disdained aura of Sukuna right next to you for a moment. âThere are many things I hold close to my heart â you and our friendship being part of them.â
âI agree. I mean it when I regard you as one of my greatest treasures. This friendship weâve had these years â decades, even â has been a blessing that I do not want to take for granted. Even with this war on my shoulders, I wish for it to be put to rest so I can finally have you by my side again. And thatâs whyâŠâÂ
Gojo lifts your hand to his face; the soft feeling of his pillowy lips on your fingers has you holding your breath. Just like SukunaâŠ
âPrincess, merciful child of Tengenâs Blessed Ground, I ask for your hand in marriage.âÂ
It all took one second â one mere second.Â
One second for your world to come to a complete standstill, the cracking of the firewood no longer poking your eardrums and the breeze from the outside no longer grazing your skin. Your body instinctively refuses to move so much as a toe to disrupt your processing.
One second for your thoughts to absolutely vanish. No words of your own occupying your brain, no guesses on where this conversation was going. There was nothing. Nothing except the last seven words Gojo said that replay in your head. Over and over and over again.
One second for you to be in a perfect state of perplexity. Right before Sukuna grabs your free hand and yanks you to his side the next. Three giant hands wrap around you while one grips your wrist tightly.Â
He snarls, âWhat the fuck do you think youâre doing?â
Gojo sucks his teeth before straightening yourself. âEhhhh, is your demon brain screwed on right? You donât know what a marriage proposal is?â His question struck you more than it did the beast. Huh? A marriage proposal? Marriage!?
The fingers of Sukunaâs upper left-hand grips your shoulder, claw-like nails poking your skin as if to draw blood. âHmph, the nerve of you humans never fails to disappoint me. Especially you, Satoru Gojo, who remains a thorn in my foot. Must I kill more of your men to keep you at your place as you did to my demonfolk?â
âKhh, donât act like you ever cared about the lives sacrificed on your behalf. Itâs gross.â Gojo takes one step, and Sukuna swiftly lifts his upper right hand at him, his fingers positioned at the same sign when he made flames for your fireplace. Your eyes widen, please, not in my room! Gojo takes a stance for battle. âActing human doesnât suit you at all, fuckface.âÂ
The roar of laughter that the demon bellows out was chilling to hear. The vibrations coursing from his body to yours rocked you to your core. âHah! Me, human!? Thereâs a reason I let go of that part of myself a long time ago. It made me weak â held me back from my full potential. You are right, though; itâs beneath me to care for those below me. However, I donât tolerate those that mess with whatâs mine.âÂ
The word had Gojoâs eyes taper. âLet them go.â
âNo. If anything, I should skin you here and now for even laying a finger on them in front of me.â You peered up at Sukuna, your anxiousness refusing to settle down during this high-stakes scenario. âBecause any man that dares touch my wedded deserves to be torn and shredded by my hands alone.âÂ
You couldnât hide your gasp. It snuck past you â the perfect reaction to what you heard. HâHis wedded? Me? Lord Sukunaâs wedded-to-be!? No wonder he was acting like thatâŠ!
âYour wedded?â Gojo was just as taken aback as you were. âYouâve got some huge balls to declare that right after bearing witness to me proclaiming my request for their hand.âÂ
âTch, bastard, why do you think I was here before you?â Sukuna flashes his big teeth, pride exuding from his form. âDid you honestly think Iâd allow the princess to end up with the likes of you? Now, arenât you too old for fairy tales?â Youâre still in shock of this madness. Two marriage proposals within the same hour? Both from your childhood friends who unequivocally despise each otherâs existence? Any regular person would feel as if theyâre experiencing a whirlwind right now.Â
Wait a minuteâŠ
âOh, weâre talking fairy tales, you repugnant jackass.â Itâs Gojoâs turn to get a kick out of this. âFrom what I can tell, the princess is meant to spend the rest of their life in comfort with a handsome human prince who swears to protect them and those they care for. Not a creature whose source of joy comes from killing and mayhem. You? Capable of love? Heh, be real. Not even your own dead mother was able to show you real love for her abomination of aââ
He stopped talking when he felt something warm roll down his cheek, a red fluid streaking to drop from his chin. You see a cut and blood, and a wave of dread hits you like a wall. It was Sukunaâs doing, no doubt. Your best friends were fighting in front of you, in your safe space. Your nerves have long forgotten what it meant to be in a state of calm.Â
Please, wait, stopâ
âI already told you your death has been postponed, you northern shit,â red eyes darken, Sukuna's tone and aura unveiling a sense of brutality that shadowed your very being. It had you trembling. âBut I donât mind severing your tongue to make a point.â
The skin around the cut on Gojoâs skin begins to morph to find each other, seaming itself back to mint condition with a blue glow. Healing magic fixed his cut and cleared his blood, but the anger boiling inside him was prevalent in those striking eyes. Wanting nothing more than a bleeding head between his hands. âIâd like to see you try, you ugly prune.âÂ
NO, STOP IT!!
This was all too much for a single night. This whole ordeal was far from your expectations. It was already stressful enough thinking about what would happen when the two lords were in this palace together. Now, in your quarters, youâve never experienced a more life-and-death crisis having your friends â companions you used to laugh and engage with together â wanting to rip each otherâs throats, especially for your hand in marriage. And, Tengen forbid, if you were to accept oneâs proposal over the otherâŠthat would ignite a war above all wars. The bodies that fall on this mainland would all be in your undoing. The thought enough was too much to bear!Â
âI accept both!!â
The hostile complexion of the room vanished into the air in the blink of an eye. The sound of burning logs and dancing flames filled the space like before; the crashing ocean waves could be heard from your balcony. Nature was speaking without noises to interrupt it. It was quiet, too quiet.Â
You didnât know what you just said until the last morphemes left your tongue. You silently remove your figure from Sukuna, covering your mouth in disbelief. And without having to see for yourself, you could tell that the two lords were just as flummoxed from your sudden sentence. WhatâŠWhat did I say just now?
âWhat did you just say?â As if he could read your mind, Sukuna relays your inner turmoil to be addressed.Â
Your heart was beating at an unbearable rate, your ears ringing like theyâd soon set off and bleed. The trembles get worse with every second, and wiping your face off this Earth at this exact moment is all you wish for. You were so nervous that you were mere seconds away from the brink of tears. Oh, Tengen, why did I say that? What was I thinking?!? What am I to do? What do Iâ
ââŠExpress to them how you feel, that you wish for nothing but an end to this bloodshed and to restore whateverâs left to rebuild their past allianceâŠâÂ
And then, like a strange flash of an angelic tune, the words of your lady-in-waiting come back to you, instantly calming you down and reminding you who you are. You are the princess of the Western Front, the next heir after your father. This matter was bound to fall onto your lap one way or another â preferably less drastically and excitingly like this.
I am the princess, but their friend above all elseâŠYou remove your hands from your face, exhaling a shaky breath before standing tall. ââŠ.I accept both marriage proposals of my Lords.â
The menâs bewildered expressions were expected, just like the dismay in their voices. âBoth of ourââŠ! Surely you donât mean thatââ Gojo was the first to speak, silver brows screwed with confusion.Â
âI do.â A deep breath before you answered him. âI will only accept the proposals of both you and Lord Sukuna.â
The demon took one thunderous step, the vibrations crawling up your bones. âAnd just why is that?â
You exhale through your nostrils, chewing on your bottom lip. âUnderstand that I am humbly flattered by your perspectives â it fills me with gladness to know I can be hospitable to my dear friends againâŠAs you both mentioned, I, too, cherish the two of you profoundly, and my trust for you two will never be extinguished. To be asked for my hand by either of you is an honor Iâll forever appreciateâŠ.But I cannot choose one over the other.â
âBullshit,â Sukuna folds his upper arms, the lower resting on his hips. âYou can; you just choose not to.â
âNo, I care for you both, and choosing one alone would have people hurt. Both between us three and the people of this continentâŠâ You maintain eye contact with both lords while your hands fidget with your nightgown to ease yourself. âA rivalry is happening between the Eastern and Northern fronts; bloodâs already been spilled and soaking Tengenâs soil. If I were to choose one proposal, I canât be guaranteed that this onslaught of violence will cease. Or, would either of you guarantee that you wouldnât take the life of the other?â
That question had the two royals look at each other briefly, followed by their scowls and groans. Gojo is the next to speak, âWhat happens between us shouldnât concern you, my princess.â
âYouâre wrong; it concerns me tremendously. It is a concern thatâs been eating me alive, watching my allies â my friends â fight each other on the sidelines, refusing to pick a side with my father. Now, you two come here, bend your knees, hold my hands, and ask for my hand, silently requesting my involvement for more bodies to drop like flies under my reign?⊠No, I would not find rest from this night forward, knowing that more innocent lives plummet from my answer.â
âIt wouldnât be blood on your hands.â
ââŠBut it would be blood that I paint with my very shadow.â
The response sounded foreign to him, yet you stood tall, making sure your heart didnât falter with your stance. Silence welcomes the three figures again, an old friend that goes well with the tense atmosphere. Two pairs of red observe you, like cerulean orbs that stay on your appearance.
A few seconds go by, and Gojo screws his eyes shut. âSo, thatâs it, you accept both proposals.â
A curt nod. âYes, my Lord.â
âYour final decision?â
âCorrect.â
The snow-haired man nodded aimlessly, slouched with a large sigh, turned, and headed for your bed to flop face down â like it was his bed. âHaaaaaah, you are your fatherâs kid, all right,â you could make out his words even with his face in your sheets. âA pacifist heart.â
âHmph, such a dumbass reason,â Sukuna huffs with absolute annoyance, and youâre amazed he hasnât already skinned you and Gojo. âYou are not a child anymore. You canât possibly be serious about taking up two husbands for the sake of peace.â
âYouâre right: I am no child, for Iâve never been as serious as I am now.â Look at you, sticking up for yourself in the presence of the demon king. Although, you know he can hear the quiver in your voice trying to crawl out. You swallow, âItâs either both of you or nothing at all.â
His left eyes squint as they examine your features, the mouth on his belly gritting its teeth. âTsk, both or nothingâŠMeanwhile, you know I canât be in the same room with him. Not even Tengen could command me to share you with this brat.â
Gojo swifts on the covers to lie on his back. âFinally, something I can agree with the devil himself. Heâs right, though; there are many things in my life I would rather not share with anyone â you being the top of my list.â
You take their concerns with patience and a lifted chin. âI understand you both, but if you two canât let the fog clear and talk with each other, how can I see myselfââ
âLet the fog clear?â Sukuna repeats with furrowed eyebrows. âSorcerers came into my land and ransacked my villages â sorcerers from this bastardâs empire!âÂ
âAn action that validates your anger and course of action,â you remind yourself to take tiny breaths. ââŠHowever, Satoru didnât order the attack himself; they went against procedure and stormed your country with poor judgment.â
The tall demon rolls all of his eyes and clicks his teeth. âRidiculous.â
âNo, whatâs âridiculousâ is how you fail to acknowledge why those sorcerers went to your zone.â Gojoâs turn to interpolate. âOne of the noble sorcerers and his company died because of your demon folk invading my country without permitted passage. That noble had a family, students that followed his footstepsââ
âAre you saying my people didnât have kin of their own to return to, Gojo Satoru?â
âYour people sure kill like they donâtââ Another swipe of Sukunaâs fingers glid the air; this time, Gojoâs Infinity was on guard, ricocheting the cleave to mark a scratch on one of the curtains. âHah, just like their leader.â
Sukuna flexes his knuckles to crack, black fingernails appearing sharper. âThe demons who killed that sorcerer acted on their own accord. Just like the many men of your land who came to mine, whom I corrected for your lack of oversight.â
âThen allow me to fulfill my mistake,â the silver-haired manâs eyes glow. âAnd let me kill the demons responsible â just like you did to my men, fucking cretin.â
âOver my dead body, human trash.â
âMy Lords!â The men concurrently exchange their gazes back to you. âThis is why I will not be accepting either proposal solely. You come to my home to ask for my hand because you see me as of value, correct? Well, you both are people I care deeply for, and the thought of walking beside either of you for eternity is something Iâd accept unmistakably under different circumstancesâŠBut, please acknowledge my position in all of this: I am the princess of an extraordinary continent and heir to the throne after my father, a man who has maintained peace and harmony all these years. Now, that peace is hanging on the brink of death and will soon be a matter I should issue alone, and the men whoâve grown with me and cherish me combating each other until one stands tallâŠ.or none stand at all.â
Word spilled after another as if a dam had broken down â fingers jitter even when clasped together. Your throat dries up after every sentence, yet your unwavering resilience pushes you to keep going.
âIâm sorry if what Iâm saying or doing is selfish, andâŠyou may be right that Iâm going at it with the whims of a child. But, please,â Do not cry, do NOT cry. âStanding idly every passing day watching the men Iâve grown toââ Love? Isnât that too intimate of a word to assume? ââŠtreasure kill themselves and others without doing anything wounds me enough. And if you think I can sit here in this palace and watch my intended go far and yonder to kill another person whom I cherish with no guarantee that they will return to me wholly, think twice.â
Your shoulders threaten to tremble; of course, youâre frightened beyond belief by what youâre saying. But youâre sure if she was here, Utahime would pull you in for a hug and acclaim how well youâre following her counsel.
âPlease, I justâŠcanât bear it.â
Uncomfortable muteness gnaws you alive within the muteness of your room. Youâre bound to draw blood on your bottom lip with how much youâre chewing it. If only your father were awake in this hour, his guidance at a moment like this would be beneficial, or merely observing from afar how youâre managing would give you some hope. Alas, you know heâs in deep sleep halls away. Itâs just the three of you in this space â or just you versus the huge opposing auras thick enough to be slit by Sukunaâs cleaves.Â
Speaking of whom, the demon king watches you the entire speech. Same with Gojo, whose blue eyes dwindle back to their typical hue. The two men donât dare break the silence as you stand before them, mentally swimming in thoughts alone to yourselfâŠ.Well, at least the northern prince wouldnât dare to do so first because Sukuna initially ripped the stillness to shreds. He says, âAnd how would your father respond to this feckless plan of accepting two marriage proposals?â
A worthy question to ponder. ââŠIâm sure heâd come to an understanding once I explain my reasoning,â the belly of the eastern king grumbles. âIâm sure heâd be contended at the fact that his two trusted allies would want to join houses.â
Gojo sits up straight atop your bed. âWell, that sounds all nice and dandy on that front. But, the problem still lies in us acting likeâŠa âreal couple.â Face it, princess; you may seem okay with being with us both, but that doesnât mean weâd be on the same page.â
Sukuna nods curtly. âIâd rather eat every human alive than entertain the thought of someone other than me touching you.âÂ
The other shrugs. âEven if the worldâs fate depends on it.â
The menâs grievances are valid arguments for why your plan can backfire, particularly when suggesting a relationship where two people canât stand each other. What youâre posing is an action that has been practiced before yet isnât entirely favored in the public eye. Nevertheless, your stance doesnât change; you refuse to go back on your word, believing that itâs a better alternative to condone than the others. The only tricky part is convincing your childhood friendsâŠ
âŠWhich is why what youâre about to do is indubitably unlike you.Â
ââŠWhat are you doing?"
But despite that, itâs a course of action that highlights your determination.
ââWoah!! Princess?! Why are you undressing??!â
Even if itâll go down as the most downright humiliating thing youâve done to yourself.
Your nightgown meets the ground of your feet, the cool air wrapping your nude frame with the heat of the fireplace hovering on one side. Arms free of sleeves, nipples easily spotted now with the dismissal of clothing, the region between your lower thighs bare, and delicate skin exposed for only the men in the room to see. And even then, your face doesnât decline the miserable hotness. Embarrassed? No doubt about it.
âMy Lords,â you croak, balled fists muster to contain whatever left of dignity you can. âThis formâŠisnât meant for any regular eyes to see â an offering only a slim few Iâd trust to witness. Tonight, I want you two to see me like this.â You slowly step forward, gradually getting closer to Sukunaâs giant size. âAs your princess, I offer my whole to you both, as you are mineâŠand I am yours.â
Sukuna blinks at your small figure close to his; the intensity of his stare is enough to have your heart sink into a pool of regret. Until he bends to scoop you with his lower arms, you yelp at the sudden action with hands finding his sturdy shoulders to grab. Now, he is way closer than you anticipated, his very chin inches away from brushing your naked chest. Holy shit.
âYou are mine, and I am yours?â he lifts his eyebrow. âWas that not true already?â You gulp thickly before answering, daring to cup his cheek with a hesitant hand. Again, youâre surprised to see it still attached, let alone see him lean to your palm.Â
âYouâd have to prove it true â here and now, make this ceaseless battle end by claiming me as yoursâŠYou too, Gojo.â You and the demon holding you turn to the man sitting on your bed. The pale skin of his face now harbors shades of pink that cascade across his cheeks and the dip of his ears, expression dumbfounded to what he witnessed. âDemonstrate how serious you are for my hand, or you and Sukuna can leave my room.â
Sky-blue eyes blink absentmindedly, words hard to pick and choose for the human prince in this bizarre minute. Sukuna then speaks with a huff.
âWell, are you going to start moving or what? Because whether you stay or not, your princess will become mine tonight.â He grins before leaning in to lick your skin, and you hold a whine when the mouth of his navel lightly chews on your tummy. âAnd on the many nights coming after.â
The beastâs words flip a switch, causing Gojo to chuckle and shake his head while unbuttoning his shirt. âNot if I have something to do about it, four-eyesâŠâ
You drew in breath while watching Gojo undress, more of his milky skin stripped out of his clothing, revealing parts of the prince that you could only imagine in your fantasies. Heat flourishes to your ears, and another gasp is pulled out when Sukuna sneaks his free lower hand to cusp your buttcheek. He then brings an upper hand to your chin to face him and his sneer.Â
âYouâve made this night a whole lot more interesting.â
And that was the last time the sound of the fire cracking caught your attention.
âââ ââ
ââ
â âââ
âMmmmâŠAhhâAhhh!!â
âKeh, sure are tight as hell; definitely a virgin.â
âFuck, I can hear the sounds from hereâŠOh, fuuckâŠ!â
The sea breeze climbs up to your terrace, crawling into your room to swing the curtains of your canopy. The candles around your room continue to flame and provide light for the room to glow. The scent of lavender and rose from your bath and lotion an hour earlier remains in the air and sticks to your skin. The midnight hour isnât yet, but the sky is dark enough past the twilight hues.Â
Expected as the former home of the Great Saint Tengen, the palace is as enormous. Harboring many rooms, halls, and floors for the company of the royal family and their subjects, the castle is unchallenging for a newcomer to get lost inside without a proper guide. Every room is catered to a specific event, person, meeting, or occasion in this place. On top of that, multiple guest chambers are meant for the guests invited under the Kingâs audience to rest.
âŠBut it seems that Gojo and Sukuna are not retiring for the night anytime soon.
How could they sleep when youâre being a courteous host, letting your childhood friends spend the late hours in your room? Just like when you were young and playmates or learning to master a weapon. The only thing is that these two arenât the same as two decades ago; they are men, branded with titles and responsibilities, blood already stained their knuckles, and duties hold them to a high expectation that you know all too well.Â
And, like all men, they have a salacious curiosity only appropriate for the bedroom. An interest you knew would one day be prevalent in your life if you agreed to take either as a husbandâŠYet, youâre not as prepared on the chance youâd face both realities simultaneously.Â
All three of you are stationed in your bed, clothes decorating your floor to leave you all bare for each other to see and marvel at â more so on your part. You lie on your back to a giant broad chest and stomach, Sukuna right behind you with his lower arms holding your feet by the back of your knees. Knees spread apart, your naked lower half is out, free for the monster to insert a single thick digit of his left upper hand into your wet chasm while the right fondles your left tit.
Never in your life did you think you were capable of producing such indecent noises. Low whimpers are embarrassing to recollect as the demon king plays with your most tender parts. His big fingers tweak your nipple, and the digit â way thicker than yours â inside your cunt is enough to stretch your opening, wiggling and scratching the inside. Fingering yourself never felt like this, your body experiencing a refreshing sensation you hadnât known of. And to have the eastern king of all people to bestow this feeling on you brings just as much awe as humiliation.
Nonetheless, that indignity doesnât cease. Gojo stands on his knees before you, propped between your sunder legs, while his hand strokes an erect limb. Yes, as a virgin maiden, tonight would be the very first time you ever see a living, breathing member, and the northern lord takes that honor with a lustful smile. His solid cock gets stiffer with every jerk, a left curve protruding the more your appearance excites him. To be observed and used as material as your slit is fingered? How lewd!
âNnnn, ahaahnâŠâ Sukunaâs finger rubs on your velvety surface, your legs wanting to squirm despite the monsterâs hold. âOh GodsâŠOhhh!!â
âDamn, you look so good,â Gojo mutters under his breath, precum drizzling his fingertips. âLooks like it feels good, huh, princess?â
âSure feels like it,â every word that Sukuna utters causes tremors to pass down his abdomen to your back, the very vibrations crawling on your skin like the tongue that licks your back to make you arch. âHm? Tell us how you really feel, little one.â
The usage of that name causes your vaginal walls to twitch; he has never called you as such, and picking such an intimate time to do so makes your frame feel awkward and warm. ââŠI-Iâfffmm!âdonât knowâŠâ
âHmph, you dare lie to me,â he bends to your ear, and his deep chuckle ignites your stomach to knot itself. âLike your body doesnât speak for itself, clenching on my finger like you want to snap it off.â
âTh-thatâs notââThe graze of your upper wall cuts you off, and your hands struggle to find places to grab, gripping the skin of Sukunaâs thigh and grabbing tuffs of his apricot hair.Â
The demon king snickers more when his middle finger teases your taint, pressing a kiss on your cheek before a quick bite. âOnly one finger in, and youâre already wailing like a common whore; be lucky that I havenât added another, then youâd really be prepared for meâŠâ You feel something brush up against your back, the tips of Sukunaâs cocks reminding you of his eventual promise.
âWooow, calling the future heir a whore; mustâve forgotten whose room weâre in.â The white-headed man had something to say about that, satisfyingly ruining the mood for the demonic being.Â
âThey donât seem to mind, at least their cunt doesnât,â uncouth cords that speak truth, your vulva squeezing his finger constantly. âWho wouldâve thought the beautiful, refined, and compassionate princess,â each enunciated word has consequences that are a lick and bite to your helix. âWas, in fact, a dirty, nasty girl?â
âHoly shit,â Gojoâs hand goes faster, his dick ready with stiffness. The image of you melting under the Fallen Starâs hold is too hot for the young man to witness. âGod, I wanna fuck you so bad, babyâŠâ
Sukuna clicks his teeth. âWell, hurry the hell up and do it before I change my mind and fuck them myself.â
âAnd have them bleeding to death because of your giant dicks on their first time? Fuck that,â He ignores the four rolled eyes as he maneuvers closer to you, Sukuna pulling his finger out of your wet slit and slithering further down to your anus. He coaxes you to relax your tense muscles, pushing his digit into your puckered hole second by second. The gasp you release once itâs added sends shivers up Gojoâs shoulders. âA princess should be treated like a pearl â tended to with the utmost care.â
âGoâjoooâŠâ You whine as the human heir cups your cheeks to squeeze.
âWhat did I say about using my family name?â He scolds with a cheeky tune, gauging your reaction as he disposes his cockhead to the folds of your vagina.Â
ââŠS-SaâMmmph!â The push of his pink tip is a new sensation.
âShhh, itâs okay,â He coos, caressing your cheek with his thumb. âRelax, just focus on me.â Your eyes lock with his, distracted by the twinkle and swirl of his azure irises, like a whirlpool sinking into the darkness of his dilated pupil. âWhatâs my name, cutie?â
âSaaaâŠSatoâOhhh!!â And just like that, the tip of his limb enters inside, bypassing your knowledge until the wince of pain snaps you out of your distraction. ââŠtoâruuâŠâ
His teeth glisten under her grin. âThatâs my good girl.â
Gojo keeps propelling himself inside you, gradually shoving every inch of his lengthy girth. You bite your quivering lip at the stretch of your opening, accommodating the foreign body part burrowing inside your inner channel. The left curve of his has his penis rubbing on parts of yourself you hadnât thought possible; a graze of your G-spot causes your legs to quirk and toes to curl.Â
But then, once his silverish pubes meet your outer labia, he reaches the depth of your cervix and gives it a chaste kiss. And your frame suddenly shuts down briefly, your senses running cold before you cry aloud without knowing. Your hands rush to cover your mouth, but the damage is too late.
Sukuna raises a brow. âWhat a shout.â He then uses your reaction to add another digit into your ass.
âAhhhh, there it is,â Gojo swallows thickly, hips speaking for themselves as they sway. âThat was cute as hellâthe way you twitch feels so goodâŠâ Another poke to your cervix, and your legs canât help but wrap around Gojoâs waist.
âSatoru, pleaseâŠ!â You plead with knitted eyebrows. âPleasee, be gentle with meâŠâ
Blue eyes narrow. âGod, who told you to be so adorable?â Gojo angles down to your face, his nose mere centimeters to yours. âDonât worry, baby, Iâll treat you right tonightâŠHmmm.â
The man leans in to place his lips on your forehead before his own, and the pace of his thrusts quickens to mediocrity. The rubs on your silky texture become frequent, lightly pounding his shaft into your to till his testes knock your chasm, the whimpers you try to repress boost to a louder volume. His left curve spikes up your nerves with every push and pull, easing the itching heat that permeates around your lower half.Â
Hands writhe around to calm around Gojoâs cold back; you say his name in prayers. You can feel something coming, and if he keeps rutting to you like this, itâs bound to come earlier than expected. ââNnaaa, Satâruuu, w-wait!! I canâtâAhaann!!â
ââMmmm! Yeah, just like that, princess, keep gripping on me like thatâŠâ He doesnât listen, too lost in your warmth and wetness that he canât stop. The flex of his abs increases, plunging into your pussylips desperately as if he can sense the eventual you fear.Â
âT-Toruu, wait, go slooww!!â Words mean nothing, hips not declining in their needing cadence. Oh Gods, I can feel it; itâs coming! Nerves climb to a peak way too fast for your comprehension, nails digging into Gojoâs skin before your orgasm hits you, choked squeaks leaving puffy lips as your cunt contracts around the princeâs girth and your asshole clamping around Sukunaâs fingers.
And Gojo is right there experiencing your climax with you, moaning under his breath and pressing his forehead to yours before he completely melts under the fluttering motions of your genitalia. ââMmfff, ffffshit, so tightâŠ!â He canât stop thrusting into you, moving his pelvis slowly to draw out the sensation before he sinks into a crescendo of his own. âFuuck! Yeah, cutie, thatâs right; ride it out,â he snaps an abrupt drill to your aching entrance. âRide it outâŠâ
Sukuna scoffs lightly before whispering in your ear. âDone already, human?â Patronizing attitude to make you fidget. âBetter be ready for me still.â
âEhhh, but Iâm not done here.â The snow-haired man retorts, massaging your waist out of the quakes.Â
A thread snaps in the wake of the otherâs words, and Sukunaâs lack of patience drives him to push you and Gojo off of him. The two of you roughly position to where you are essentially straddling Gojo, his erection still inside your slick-coated cavern. The devilish man swiftly ends up on his knees before contorting his massive figure to dwarf both humans beneath him.
âGahhh!! Sukuna, what the fuck wâMmmph?!?â With the spawn of a mouth, the eastern king shuts the northern man up by slamming his upper left hand onto his mouth for an unexpected kiss. Gojo muffles under the otherâs palm, the tongue shoving itself inside.
âShut up,â Sukuna orders with annoyance. âSo damn chattyâŠAnd you,â he uses his lower hands to steady your ass, and you stifle a yelp at the contact of something pressing up against the opening of your butt. âStay still, or I can make it hurt real bad.â
His warning is enough to keep you immobile, following his instructions and stationing your breathing to a steady rhythm. Your hands-on Gojoâs chest ball to fists once Sukuna pushes his tip to your asshole, your mouth forming a permanent âoâ shape once he eventually gets the cockhead inside. Just when you thought this night couldnât get any more extreme, you had forgotten about the taller individualâs well-endowed self: two hefty, girthy limbs that you NEVER, in your wildest dreams, imagine would put inside your body â not even one!
However, tonight was the night that would be put to the test, and at the very least, Sukuna compromised, using one of his members to ravage your interior while the other skims the crevice of your asscheecks. He goes excruciatingly slow; rather than just ramming the entire thing in one go, itâs better. Gods, no, youâd be shedding more tears than you already are. Every inch thatâs plunged inside you pushes out shaky breaths, sobbing from the intrusion and bits of drool slowly escaping you.
âDaahhnn, ohmyGâNnnm!!â Itâs finally all in, all swallowed up by the ridge of your bottom. You call to him, âS-SukunaaâŠfuull, so fuulllâŠâ
âI bet you are.â He adds more weight, scrunching down, making it worse by caging you under his bow. Sukuna grinds his hips, which evoke sharp cries, âHmmm, fuck, so tightâŠâ
The salmon-haired behemoth rocks his enormous hips, the propulsion strong enough to rock you and Gojo concurrently. This time, unlike the northern man under you, Sukunaâs movements exude dominance; from his firm grip on your waist to the confident pull of his hips, everything he does is marked with a purpose. You can tell by how his big, weighty balls smack on your sexed union with Gojo.
Speaking of whom, the polar royal subsists in the kiss with Sukunaâs hand. Yet as the seconds turn to a minute, his expression morphs into a less perturbed display. Instead of fighting it, he kisses back with the palm and bucks his hips into you. The action of his cock rubbing on the sweet spots of your vagina while the one carves and churns your butthole and the other glides on your crack grinds your brain to turn into mush. Your nerves have yet to calm down from the prior orgasm, senses overloaded with constant commotion going on in your private parts.
Sukunaâs pushes become quicker and mightier, and the more he ruts, the more your clit grinds onto Gojoâs pelvis, sending shocks straight to your head. Thereâs no room for restâŠ! ââOhhh, hoooohâKunaaa, Kunaa, pleaseeeâŠ!â
ââPlease, please,â please what?â He mocks you, knowing youâre powerless to reprimand him in this predicament. âJust whining and whining like a bitch in heat; have you no shame, princess?â
âOhhh, Iâm gonnaâshtoooop!!â He licks your ear as you moan aloud, steamy tears striking down your hot cheeks. The pace increases, and so does the swipe of your clit and the bump of your womb. âOhhhfuck, fuck, fuckfuuuuckâŠ!!â
âKehaha, look at you; the poor princess finally breaks their poised picture,â dark, pleased chuckles seep out of the demon kingâs lips, biting onto your shoulder harshly to make you scream. And judging by him licking your added wound, youâre sure he drew blood.Â
âAhhsshhâohmyGod, ohmyGod!! Sâkuna, donât!!â Desperate pleads slur out. âIâm gonna break; yâre gonna break meeeâŠ!!!â
âGood, I want you to be broken,â he sneers as his upper right arm pushes you to face him. âBreak for me; think of nothing else other than being mine. Right now, your mind, body, and soul are mine to torment and tear apart. You are my little dove, small and easy to break from now till your dying breath. Am I clear, pet?â
Scared? Of course. The way his scarlet orbs bore holes into your very being had you petrified; he doesnât need his hellish aura and brawny hands that can snap a tree in half to assimilate fear into your heart. Witnessing the true power of the King of Demons with just his stare, nothing scarier than thatâŠAnd yet, your anus and chasm canât stop squeezing like crazy.
ââŠYess, my Lord,â you croak, his finger wiping the saliva on his fingertip. âI am your pet from thisânnmm!!âthis moment until theâŠvery last.â
Anxiety doesnât diminish when he broadens a devilish smile, but it transforms into perplexity once he slams his lips onto yoursâyour first kiss, taken by the eastern King, along with the chastity of your rear hole. And thereâs Gojo, who is the very man who has taken claim of your virginity. Two men, your childhood companions, taking your firsts! Tonight, indeed, is marked down as an eventful occasion for you.Â
You sink into the passionate kiss, your tiny tongue swirling around with Sukunaâs, his fangs grazing the muscle teasingly before he nibbles on it to hear you shrill for him. All the while, his hips go erratic, motivating Gojo to increase his tempo. The feverish rhythm leaves you breathless, crying in the company of lust and rapture to the point that youâve become numb. Your vision becomes blurry, your head foggy, and the air between you three misty. Noises of skin smacking onto each is all you hear, drowning you further into another spazz you couldnât adequately foretell.
Gojo and Sukuna chase their climaxes together after your walls quirk and spasm uncontrollably, letting their fluids burst inside to fill your holes to the very brim. You howl in Sukunaâs mouth, who chews on your bottom lip roughly, same with Gojoâs with the palm before snatching his hand away. The snowy-headed man huffs and pants, nearly choking on spit as his midsection flexes with every jerk of his ejaculation. And the giant above you groans while rutting into your ass, not stopping until his high passes through, the free girth ejecting semen to paint across your sweaty back.
For a few seconds, itâs utterly hot and cold at the same time, your figure trembling with the acute shocks coursing through your bones. Eyes roll to the roof of your canopy, and limbs wobble and give way for you to slump after Sukuna releases you from his breathtaking kiss. Luckily, Gojo is there to catch you, the comely noble attending to you with kisses to your temple.
âLook what you did,â he spits to his left, wanting to rid his mouth of whatever remnants Sukuna left with that disgusting kiss. âYou werenât kiddinâ when you said you wanted to break them.â
âHmph, donât ever take me for a liar,â the demonic man stretches after withdrawing his length out of your butt, chortling at the sight of his essence sticking to you. âOi, dove, you hear me?â
âPrincess, you all rightâŠ?â
Whatever words the two were saying to you had begun to fade away despite their proximity. Your eyelids refuse to fight the urge to close, and your skin allows the cold breeze to blanket you. Everything goes black, your breathing returns to balance, and the sound of the fire cracking comes back to sing you to sleep.
âââ ââ
ââ
â âââ
âMy Lady, are you sure youâre feeling all right?â
âHuh?â You snap out of being zoned out for the sixth time today. Your vision is now present with the gazebo view, the ocean glistening from the morning sun in the distance, contrasting with the beautiful greenery of your garden. Many flowers of different shapes and sizes, various colors painted on top of the veins and roots separated from the yellow brick road coursing around it. Â
You sit at the gazebo for your morning tea; itâs part of your morning routine after a nice bath and Utahime helping you pick what to wear for the day. Usually, when you sit here, you admire the tranquil sounds of the outside space and the sweet taste of your hot beverage.
ââMmmm! Yeah, just like that, princess, keep gripping on me like thatâŠâ
âStay still, or I can make it hurt real badâŠHmmm, fuck, so tightâŠâ
Memories from last night flash one after the other, ringing your ears with nothing but the erotic noises and voices from the night before. Your cheeks dial in warmth, recollecting the senses of having both men â your childhood friends â so intimately close to you. The hotness of their breath touching your skin, the wet, teasing licks of the tongue from Sukunaâs stomach, Gojoâs slender fingers swiping and pinching your clitoris as he sucks on your nipple, and Sukuna using one of his arms to restrain your hands behind your back as he uses two others to keep your hips still to hammer your holes with his girth.Â
âPrincessâŠâ the way Gojo says your name, your stomach flips to the smooth tone of his voice. His striking blue eyes survey your expression like youâre his lost treasure. His hard body meshing together with your sweaty, soft figure is a sensation youâll probably never forgetâŠ
âPrincessâŠâ Sukuna, with his red eyes and demonic face structure, put you in a paralysis spell, and his intimidating aura suffocates you to submit to his gaze and hold. Under his bow, you felt as though you were nothing but his and his alone. And you canât tell if that is scary or intriguingâŠ
ââŠâdy LadyâŠ.MY LADY!!â
âYâYes!?â Your attention swerves to reality, Utahimeâs face mere inches from yours. Her brown eyes filled with worrisome confusion, scanning your expression.Â
âWhat on Tengenâs Earth is going on with you?â She says with a sigh, âAre you sick? Did you not get enough rest last night? Tsk, it mustâve been Lord Sukuna and that blue-eyed jerk. My apologies, my Lady. I hope their intrusion didnât keep you awake for too long.âÂ
You shake your head to your best friend. âNo need to apologize, Utahime. And itâs all right; the Lords didnât give me too much trouble.â
She gives a nod to your response, observing you picking up your teacup and taking a sip before setting it back down gently. âStill, I find it odd that both lords wished to see you so late at night. At the same time, tooâŠIf you donât mind me asking, my Lady, what did they wish to speak with you?â
Again, she is your best friend, so you can trust her with the information youâre about to give. ââŠApparently, both Lord Sukuna and Lord Gojo wish to have my hand in marriageââ
âMARRIAGE!!??â
âShhhh!!â With haste, you stand from the table to cover your lady-in-waitingâs mouth from uttering another word. You swiftly survey the entire garden to see if anyone from the castle heard the shout. Luckily, it was just the two of you. âPlease, Utahime, not so loud.â
The woman with her mouth covered blinks once, twice, before giving an assured mod for you to release her lips. She now speaks in whispers with you, âMy apologies. ButâŠmarriage??â
âI know, it surprised me, too. It seems my father gave them his blessings to ask for my hand. It could be for the sake of our families and relations or to strengthen the bond of our empires to maintain the powerhouse that is our continent.âÂ
âMmm, those are valid reasons to consider, especially after the Great War, and that the bond of the three empires would give a good messageâŠOr perhaps, did the Lords wish to wed you for more personal reasons?â
They did. Thatâs what you wanted to say. But instead, all you could do was think about their proposals from last night. The way they both stood on one knee and took two hands. Gojoâs eyes never looked so sincere and soft when looking at you, placing his soft lips on your left ring finger to gently kiss it. He looked like his princely self. But that night, he showed the caring and soothing cadence you had fallen in love with all these years. And Sukuna, oh Lord. Never did you think youâd live to witness the day this giant being before you took a knee for anyone â especially for you. Your right hand easily dwarfed in his grasp, brought to his lips that youâd only ever dream to have touch you. And those piercing eyes of his, red like blood, examining every single feature of yours as if you were the thing that made him strong yet weak. It was subtle, something only meant for your eyes to see. But most of all, it was genuine.Â
ââŠThat might be it, as well.â You mutter under your breath, your cheeks becoming warm while reminiscing the scenes to yourself.Â
However, your chambermaiden was no fool at all. She could tell from your wandering gaze that something, in fact, did happen between the three royals that night. She lifted a brow at your response, âI think that is the case, seeing as though youâre trying to hide the smile from me.â
You squeak, immediately facing in her direction, seeing the foxy grin on her beautiful, scarred face. âIâm smiling?â
âAha!â Oh no, I fell for it. âGotcha! Oh my, it seems my Lady is having troubles with the heart. Could it be you are considering the marriage proposals?â
âWâWellâŠI donât know myself,â it was an honest answer; you didnât know the answer yourself. âThe matter caught me off guard; I wasnât expecting either of them to come to my quarters, let alone propose to me on the night of their arrivalââ
âThatâs not my question, my princess.â You gulp when she cuts you off, Utahime narrowing her feline eyes as she speaks. âIt made you incredibly nervous that the three of you would be here at the same place, thinking those two would go at each otherâs throats. Now, two Lords still stand, asking for you to be by their side, and you can barely keep a straight face. If you ask for my piece, Iâm relieved they came here with the thoughts of marriage rather than spark up talk of another war in this continent.âÂ
You hum along to your maiden's words, taking in her reasoning. Yet she continues, âAnd judging by how fidgety you appear to be on this fine morning, something tells me youâre on the fence of accepting. Who will take my Ladyâs hand? Lord Ryomen? Gojo? Ugh. If itâs the latter, Iâll only deal with him for your happiness. And Lord Ryomen, oh my. Being the spouse to the most powerful beast of Holy Tengen's continent , itâs something out of a fairyââ
âUtahime, calm down!â You stop the lady from her excitement bubbling into something substantial. You can tell sheâs itching to plan your wedding â whenever that be â once your tea time is finished. âIâŠI didnât accept their proposals, not yet.â
The dark-haired woman drops her jaw; how unfortunate it is for you to lie to your best friend. âWhat do you mean!? You didnât? Then how come you three were discussing for such a long time? I saw Lord Gojo return to his quarters in the middle of the night, and I figured it was because you all had an in-depth discussion.â You open your mouth, but your words are caught on the back of your tongue. You couldnât formulate a proper excuse or lie in time. Because of that hesitation, Utahimeâs brows draw upward with wide eyes, her mouth changing into a small âoâ shape. It was at that moment that you realized you dug yourself a grave.
âPrincess,â her voice was still hushed, speaking slowly as if not to jump so hard to her assumptions. ââŠWhat exactly were you doing with Lord Satoru and Ryomen?â
âPRINCESS! PRINCESS!!â
Saved by another voice entering the fray, you and your lady-in-waiting turn around to see another person coming to the garden, running down the brick road to your destination. As they came closer, you could tell from the bright blue hair and uneven bangs that it was Utahimeâs apprentice, the lower-status handmaiden Kasumi Miwa. Your lady-in-waiting was the first to correct her before getting closer, âMaiden Miwa! Iâve told you about running so freely around the castle. What if you were to bump into someone?â When Miwa is in the presence of the two of you, sheâs huffing and puffing. âAnd stand up straight!â
âEek! Sorry, Lady Iori, but I come bearing news for the princess!â Miwa fixes her posture and messy blue hair while trying to situate her breaths steadily. âPrincess, Iâm here to tell you that Lords Sukuna Ryomen and Satoru Gojo wish to speak with you!â
Huh??!! âPardon??â
âYes, they wish to discuss their proposals with you from last night. At least, thatâs what they told meâŠOh, there they are!âÂ
âMiwa, shhhh, donât point!âÂ
You pay no mind to your chambermaid lecturing her young student because your eyes follow the brick pathway up to the castle steps where two figures stand. Sukuna and Gojo stand at the entranceway to the garden, both wearing their respective clothing. Not that it matters, though, because the memories from last night with your nude bodies being connected still haunt your senses. And now theyâre here, big grins on their faces that share the same reason. They know, and they know that you know. Who knew that such a night full of unexpected passion and heat would happen to you and with your closest friends since your little years, who have grown to become such strong, handsome, and powerful men.Â
Perhaps this was the union youâve wished for â the union that could finally bring you three back togetherâŠPerhaps.
ââŠTell them that Iâm available to speak.â
© đđšđŹđĄđąđ đ«đđČ2024 â reblogs + comments are appreciated wholeheartedly â header art by rororogi mogera + dividers by @cafekitsune.
#đŻđđđđ Ëââ§ê°á â à»ê± â§âË đŸđđđđđ: đđđđ#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen smut#jjk smut#jjk x you#jjk x y/n#gojo x reader#gojo smut#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru smut#gojou satoru x reader#sukuna x reader#sukuna smut#sukuna x you#ryomen sukuna x reader#ryoumen sukuna x reader#ryomen sukuna smut#jujutsu kaisen x you#jujutsu kaisen fic
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falling alone â© l.hs [m]
âą part of the modus operandi series! synopsis: cold cases were heeseungâs specialty, and he cracked every single one. cold hearts were your specialty, and you have yet to make a single chip in your husbandâs. genre: established relationship au ; strained lovers. angst, fluff, smut pairing: lieutenant!lee heeseung x therapist!housewife!reader (i love plot twists) word count: 39.5k rating: 18+. minors please do not interact. warnings: for realism purposes, everyone is aged up (22-29 ; not my favorite but it is what it is.) strained marriage/relationship dynamics, workaholic dynamics, toxic relationship dynamics that are not meant to be romanticized. talks of therapy, food mentions, birth control mention, talks of having a family. detailed descriptions of disappearances, missing persons, etc. y/n feels neglected (girl STAND UP). sex as a temporary fix, swearing, alcohol, smoking. unrequited love, lots of pining on both ends. smut warnings: multiple scenes (two and a half...just read it), heeseung has a thing for y/n in business attire, petnames (baby, babe, princess, etc.,) unexplored daddy kink, heavy petting, frottage, slight body worship (m&f.rec.) nipple play, light spanking, oral (m&f. rec), squirting, lots of pillowtalk, marking, dom/sub dynamics, hair pulling, slight degrading/praise, handholding during sex (because i'm soft so what), switch!hee x switch!yn, unprotected sex (don't do this), doggy, missionary (not a babeyun fic if it's not missionary and body worship, i fear) creampie (i hate this word so bad.) i think that's it! what to listen to: falling - harry styles ; tu falta de querer - mon laferte ; seasons - dawn, gemini ; stardust - ben webster ; my foolish heart - bill evans trio ; no song without you - honne ; take me - miso ; say - keshi ; may i have this dance - francis & the lights ; unchained melody - the righteous brothers ; can't take my eyes off you - frankie valli ; can this morning never end - davin kingston ; too good - christian kuria ; u send me swingin' - mint condition ; you and me - lifehouse. author's note: it's finally fucking here, SEVEN MONTHS later. i cannot believe my life took such a turn that my original timeline of getting these all out back out to back turned into me ghosting the internet. this being said, i really hope you guys enjoy the push and pull that are heeseung and y/n in this. they're insane but they're in love and that's all that matters. special thanks to my dearest @enhaven for all her encouragement and kind words. star dividers by @/saradika here on tumblr!
Friday, 9:23PM.
 "Late night?" Your voice has always been a comfort to him. The way you cooked dinner every night, the way you washed his hair for him, the way you laid in bed with him â it was all comforting. Your soft eyes, eyes that hadn't seen an inch of a crime scene. Your gentle hands, hands that would never cock a gun and aim to kill.
You were home to him, and he hated that he couldn't leave his work at the precinct. He always brought it with him, anywhere he wentâŠanywhere you were.
"Not really. Caught a session with Dr. Bahng, I'm sorry about dinner." He loosens his tie, trying to ignore the way your eyes follow his fingers. He takes his wedding ring off for work â insisting it snags on the gloves when gathering evidence, that he never wants to sully it with such grime. "How was your night?" Your sigh may be inward, but his eyes catch everything. Every frustrated twitch of your brows, the way your nose crinkles at the half-assed apology. Your eyes linger on the linoleum floor, and he fights the urge to pull you into his arms. He fights the urge to show any weakness to your feelings, he can't let go of work. He has to be strong, he has to be coarse, he has to be cold.
"It wasâŠfine." You wave him off, moving to take the full plates off the table. Only then does Heeseung notice that you're still in your jeans, your white top neatly tucked into them. Your feet are clad in fresh socks, almost as if you were about to go out when he arrived. His eyes scan you as you move around, pulling his tie completely off and bunching it into his pocket. "Are you going out with your friends?" You don't reply as you scrape the cold food into the trash can, and he focuses on the sound of your bracelet lightly clinking with the handle of the fork. Your shoulders sag, soft curls of your hair sweeping over your face as you move to place the dishes in the sink. He sighs, before his legs move him behind you. "Why are you upset, honey?" "I'm not, I'm not upset." You scoff, turning the tap to hot when you feel Heeseung's hands ghost over your waist. You knew better than to attempt to hide anything from him, especially with the way his brain was literally trained to analyze your every movement. His lips press softly to your cheek as his fingers untuck your top, "I know you better than that." You're silent as his fingertips trace the soft skin of your stomach, his chin resting on your shoulder. He's going to wait until you decide you want to talk, despite knowing it will be the same argument you have every single week.
The same argument that always ends up unresolved as you kiss in your bed, sheets tangled between your bodies. It's enough to hold off on actually talking about it, it's enough to semi-satisfy the lack of attention you got from him during the week. It wasn't enough to feed his unvoiced, almost insatiable hunger for you, and how he wished he could just douse you in his love and affection until the sun rose. It wasn't nearly enough, because he'd still have to pry himself from the comfort of your warm embrace to step foot in the precinct and inhale the stench of evil in the world.
He felt awful, really. That he could never truly show you how much he loved you, how emotionally constipated his job made himâŠhow his sessions with Dr. Bahng were no longer of much help. "Leave work at work, Lieutenant. You have the love of your life waiting for you at home." He had it memorized at this point.
"It's always the same thing, don't worry about it." You turn the tap off, feeling the guilt about wasting water seeping into your stomach. You weren't going to wash the dishes, you knew you weren't. You just wanted to lay down in bed with your husband, basking in the few minutes of attention he'd be able to give you before falling asleep.Â
"Baby." You wince at the pet name, one so foreign on his lips. One you so rarely heard, long lost in your college memories. You grimace as you turn in his hold, his hands now resting on your hips. "Don't baby me, Heeseung." "Don't Heeseung me, Y/N. I know something is bothering you, and whether it's tonight, tomorrow, or next week â I'm not letting you go to bed like this." He looks at you through tousled locks, his eyes speaking for him. Just talk to me.
You shake your head in subtle disbelief, attempting to push past him when he pins you against the counter gently. "Let me go, Heeseung." "Not until you tell me what's going on." His voice is harsh, one he also rarely uses with you. Heeseung was always gentle, soft-spoken. "I've been at work all day, dealing with shit I can barely stomach. I just want to come home and spend time with you, what's wrong?" He's starting to whine, and it does nothing but make your eyes sting with tears.
"I just want to spend time with you, without having to beg you for it." You breathe out, squeezing your eyes shut to avoid his gaze. "You remember everything, Hee. I know you had to remember that tonight is date night." Sighing, you peel your eyes open to a guilty husband watching you with his own tired ones.
"I'm sorry, honey. It really did slip my mind. Let meâŠlet me just take a shower and we can go have a night on the town, okay?" He starts to walk away, fingers pulling at the buttons of his shirt when you clear your throat. "It's fine, Heeseung. Let's just go to bed."
"No, let me fix this. We haven't had dinner, and we haven't spent time together in weeks." He slips his dress shirt off as he leaves your line of vision, and you just slump against the counter. He was right, and you hated that you knew he was. Heeseung was always this way, though, shouldn't you be used to it by now?
Yes, he was gentle and soft-spoken, with a touch of dirty humor and thoughtfulness that always made your heart race a little faster. Your relationship was built on a lot of comfort and deep talks, ones that usually involved you unraveling yourself entirely just to get a taste of his own secrets. The two of you had met in college, about three days after the disappearance of his childhood best friend, Cha Soyoung.
Heeseung was even more cold and stoic, and wasn't interested in so much as even befriending you. He didn't really speak, which according to his friends, was unnatural. They wound up being close friends of yours as well, thanks to Park Sunghoon, and the seven of them all also ended up working at the same precinct. "Heeseung talksâŠa lot. Not as much as Jay, but he's just going through a hard time right now." Sunghoon said as he sipped his drink, carefully chewing the tapioca pearls as the two of you walked. "It's not everyday your best friend of twenty years goes missing, you know?"You had shrugged, not really understanding what it was like. Your parents had moved you around a lot as a kid, and it was hard to make friends until they finally settled when you got into your last year of high school. You had met Sunghoon there, but only met the rest of your friends through him that following summer â except Heeseung. He'd gone home with Soyoung for the summer, returning to Seoul for the fall semester at Decelis University with her and your other friends. You still never spoke, until now.
You and Sunghoon were swinging by his dorm to help pass out flyers.
"Hey, Hoon. Y/N." Heeseung spoke quietly as he opened the door, his eyes nearly swollen shut from crying for the past three days. Your jaw dropped as you looked at his face, not at all recognizing the boy in front of you. Sure, you'd only ever seen pictures of Heeseung but you knew enough to know that thisâŠwasn't him. Neither you nor Sunghoon spoke as Heeseung moved for the two of you to follow him, shutting the door behind you.
"How are you feeling?" Sunghoon asked as he trashed his drink, your own now sweating on a coaster on Heeseung's coffee table as the man gathered things around his dorm. You stood awkwardly as you swung your backpack onto the couch, opening it for Heeseung to slide the flyers in when you saw him shake his head.Â
"I don't feel much, actually."Â
Sunghoon glanced at you, but your legs moved before you could think. You rounded the table to Heeseung, who looked at your extended arms and empathetic eyes with cold ones. He'd set down the papers in his hands, fingers splayed across them momentarily before turning back to you and awkwardly entering your embrace. Your fingers easily found the nape of his neck, and his rigid form quickly softened as he breathed shakily into your shoulder. "M'Sorry." He mumbled as you felt a few tears soak through your shirt, and you just shook your head.Â
Sunghoon also wound up wrapping his arms around the two of you. Something about the way that Heeseung's fingers clawed at your sides, and the way he sobbed into your shirt made you wonder how long he'd needed someone. Someone to ease the knot in his stomach, someone to help him see that this was something that would be solved and everything would be okay again. Someone to help him hop along until Soyoung was found, and someone to leave when she inevitably took her place again.
That was nine years ago. You and Heeseung began dating a year after that happened, a couple of months after the anniversary of Soyoung's disappearance. The police stopped looking, ruling her case as a runaway. You and Heeseung never stopped searching â you frequently asked cafe owners if you could pin missing posters on their corkboards, and even went door to door every few evenings asking if anyone had seen Soyoung.Â
Heeseung had made it to the side of the law, and frequently reviewed the case to see if he had missed anything. He never had â you had all hit a dead end. Everyone's hope began to dwindle, but Heeseung never let that sway him. He even asked the forensics department to make age-progression posters, and they did. You'd pinned those up, too.
He was strong willed, he was diligent, he was determined. You love Heeseung, you love the person he isâŠ
âŠBut you hate that he can't leave his work at work. You hate that you get a crumb of his affection every few nights, whether it's his lips pressed against your cheek after dinner or his teeth nipping at your clavicle while hovering above you in bed. You hate that you find yourself longing for him even more than you did in college, despite now having him in the deepest way â as your husband, the person who loves you.Â
The man who shed a singular tear as he watched you walk down the aisle, the man who supported you when your career wasn't what you expected. The man who endlessly told you he loved you in ways that weren't so evident to the naked eye â like leaving the warm water for you and showering in the ice cold, leaving the last slice of cake for you, rubbing your feet while watching Law and Order with you on days he didn't work (read: on days you pried him out of the home office.)
Heeseung loves you, you know that. You just can't shake the feeling that it won't be for much longer.
"Tuck in your shirt."
His voice snaps you out of your trance, and you look up to see your husband now unrolling a pair of clean socks, speaking around a wide toothed comb between his teeth. He drapes the socks over the back of a chair, eyes glued to his reflection in the hallway mirror as he combs through his hair quickly.Â
Rolling your eyes, you tuck in your shirt haphazardly as he parts his hair down the middle. "You can't go out with your hair wet, you'll get sick." You call as you make your way down to the bathroom, pulling open one of the cabinets to fish out your hair dryer. "I don't have time to dry my hair. In sickness and health, anyway." Heeseung yells down the hall, and you bite back your chuckle.
"But why make yourself sick? Sit, I'll dry it while you put on your socks." You untangle the cord, plugging it into the wall as Heeseung pouts. "The sound makes me sleepy! If I'm sleepy, we can't go out." He shakes his head, and you put a hand on your hip as you give him a pointed look. He sighs, tugging a chair towards you and plopping down.
"You're throwing a tantrum like a child. Mom, I don't want to wear my coat! Mom, I don't want my peas touching my mashed potato!" You mock his behavior, making him sulk further into the chair and creasing his shirt. "Sit up!"
He does, and watches you through the mirror as you carefully comb your fingers through his hair. He wonders why you forgive him so easily, why you do these things for him when he doesn't feel like he deserves it. The wasted dinner, the way you roll his socks after doing his laundry (that he insists he can do himself.) He wonders what he's done to make you love him so dearly.
"Where d'you wanna go? Olive You More? Thyme for Love?" His voice leaves the sulky attitude behind, as your fingers card through his damp hair, and you grimace. "Why are all our favorite restaurants so cheesy? It's disgusting." "Well, we could try that new one down by the river. Pasta La Vista, I think it's called." He taps his lips with his fingers, and you catch the glint of his gold wedding band snuggled around his left ring finger. You ignore the way your heart flutters, as you lightly smack his shoulder. "No more pun restaurants! We're not in college anymore." "Ah, but I love going to those places with you. I.." The words get caught in Heeseung's throat, as they always do. He always feels like he's saying it for the very first time, just like he did all those years ago in the middle of the woods. You got stuck in a blackberry bush, and it just slipped out.
"You..?" You ask, looking at him through the mirror. Your eyes are full of concern, a look he never stops seeing. It bothers him. "I love you." He mumbles shyly, looking away to pick at his cuticles. He doesn't see the gentle smile on your glossed lips, and feels your soft hair brush his neck as you lean to kiss his cheek.Â
"Mmh, I would hope so." "Yah, say it back." He pouts as he turns to face you, and you can only smile wider before you place a chaste kiss on his lips. "I don't need to, you know who my heart calls home. Now, get up. We've got a delicious pasta dinner to inhale, and breadsticks to steal." He doesn't ask you to say it back again, only watching as you walk away with a skip in your step. He knows, he does. He knows you love him, he knows your heart calls him home. He knows you love him.
He's just worried it won't be for much longer.
Saturday, 10:32am.
"Good morning." Your voice is raspy with sleep, eyes still slightly shut as you whisper into his skin. It's a God-given miracle that he's still in bed next to you, instead of slipping out early like a college hookup.Â
Unfortunately, that happened more often than not. "Have we always had such shitty curtains? I can't sleep with so much light." He groans, tugging your arm over his head as he moves to snuggle into your chest. His breathing softens as you pull him slightly closer, wrapping your arms fully around his head and shoulders. "Mmh, if you were still in bed by the time I woke up for the day, you'd know." "You know I can't be." He sighs, and you feel the ticklish sensation of his lips feathering over your clavicle. His teeth tug lightly at your necklace, one he gave you for your second anniversary, months after the wedding. He loves that you never take it off.Â
"It's not a matter of if you can, it's a matter of if you want to." "Don't pull that, you know I do." He kisses your skin before burying his face into your neck. "I'd never leave this bed if it were up to me." His teeth are once more doing their oh-so routine nipping at the exposed skin of your shoulder, before you shift out of his reach. "We should get breakfast."
You turn onto your back, stretching your arms above your head with a soft yawn. Though blurred with fatigue, your eyes see Heeseung perfectly, his head resting lightly on your stomach. His fingers toy with the waistband of your underwear, thumb slightly slipping beneath to rub at the skin of your hip. Your tattoo peeks through, one Heeseung never lets you forget you have. His faded initials mock the both of you. "Or, counter offer: you can be my breakfast."Â
You snort, propping yourself up your elbows to get a good look at the man now in your lap. He's pressing soft kisses around your navel, eyelashes fluttering slowly as his lips pepper around your warm skin. "Hee, you barely ate dinner."
"I've barely eaten you. I'm a man deprived, please?" His eyes finally peer up at you, and you scoff out a laugh, running a hand through your mussed curls. You shake your head as you tongue your cheek, allowing him to pull at the hem of your panties once more. "I'm not above begging, if that's what it takes. You know I'll do it." "Just take them off, you big baby. You're cheesy as shit, too." You roll your eyes as he grins, a playful bite to your outer thigh as he begins to move you around as he pleases.Â
"Open." He kneels on the bed, knuckles rapping on your knees to part them. You can't help but roll your eyes again, but comply as he tugs down your underwear. It flies somewhere across the room, forgotten in a corner to gather dust, Heeseung completely unaware as he lies on his stomach.
"I've missed this." He sighs, before placing a chaste kiss on your inner thigh. "I miss you, most of all. I promise I'll be home earlier this week, baby." He doesn't give you a chance to respond as his tongue quickly finds home between your legs, softly licking at every inch he can reach. Your lip is tucked beneath your teeth, fingers grabbing at anything you canâŠ
When his phone starts ringing. He groans into your skin, the vibrations making you shiver as disappointment takes over. He ignores the sound, choosing to pull you closer onto his face when you push his shoulder with your foot. "Just answer it, Hee." "I don't want to." His voice is muffled as his tongue collects your forming arousal, a soft moan from his throat as you squirm in his hold. "H-Hee, what if it's important?" "What if it's not? What could possibly be more important than you and I at this very moment?" His eyes are filled with a mix of annoyance and desire as he rests his cheek against your thigh. You hate the pitiful groan that escapes your lips as you reach for his phone, answering it for him. "Work."Â
Sighing, he moves off the bed as he takes the call, motioning for you to stay as he speaks. "Go for Lee."
Complying, you simply become a jellyfish of a human, sprawled across your bed. You wonder why you answered the phone for him, why you pushed him to take the call. It bothers you that even now, you have begun prioritizing his work over your relationship, when you both promised each other that your love, affections and time for each other would never dwindle.
You can't say it has, though, at least for you. You love Heeseung, one could even say that distance has made your heart grow fonder. Not seeing him often has made you a bit more independent, and every time you find yourself eating dinner at the table alone, you're reminded of your mother.Â
How she berated you for marrying for love and not stability, how she shamed you for abandoning the career that drained you of everything you had. You dislike how easy it was for her to get into your head, so much so that you'd spent all of yesterday applying for new jobs in your field, while waiting for Heeseung to get home â and hopefully have your regular date night.
Not that he was even around to have said date. Sure, he made it up to youâŠbut at what cost?
As you begin to sink into your spiraling thoughts, Heeseung reappears in the doorway of your bedroom. He doesn't speak loud enough for you to hear as he beelines for the closet â a mumble of frustrations spilling from his lips as he rips a shirt off its hanger. Turning on your side, you cover your lower half with the blanket that's no longer warm before speaking to him. "Duty calls, huh?" "Yes."Â
In silence, you watch as he buttons his shirt, the muted teal making his skin glow softly. He doesn't look you in the eyes as he revisits the closet, tugging on his favorite pair of brown slacks. A pair you made for him a few years ago, right after leaving your job â and you remember the way his eyes lit up as you presented them. You remember the way he kissed each of your fingertips that night, covered with bandaids from pin pricks. You remember returning home the next day from a girls' day with Chaewon, to find a packet of colorful silicone thimbles, and a few more pieces of glittery, cream-colored fabric laid out on your bed.
Fabric he'd used to make you a dress, with flutter sleeves and a deep v-neckline. Fabric he'd used to sit and carefully hand-stitch the flowy sarong skirt. When did he find the time? He hadn't given you much of a chance to ask questions, before he insisted you put it on and let him take you out for a nice dinner.
It was the last time the two of you truly connected on something deeper than his work or your convenient unemployment. It was the last time that the two of you genuinely laughed together and did things from your younger years, like dancing in the twilight to no music and kissing in every corner possible on the walk home. The last time you wore his favorite perfume, because after that, months passed without a second thought about you.
The silence between you has grown neutral â not entirely comfortable, because who wants to spend their days without hearing the love of their life speak to them? Laugh with them, maybe even get into a bit of a spat with them that shows your relationship is becoming more than just the bare minimum? Certainly not you, and by the way Heeseung robotically loops his tie while staring you down in the mirror, a look of longing in his eyes before turning to you.
"I won't be long, I promise."Â
He notes the way your head tilts, the way an understanding smile that doesn't quite reach your eyes takes over your face. "Don't worry, take your time." The way your hair is effortlessly splayed around your head, life's odd attempt at recreating the halo to represent the absolute angel you are. One Heeseung doesn't deserve.
You get up, swinging your bare legs over the side of the bed before grabbing for your bath towel. "I'll get ready for my day, and maybeâŠ" You trail off as your toes touch his shoes â he wore them in the house sometimes, a habit of his you despised.Â
"And maybe we can catch lunch together?" He finishes, a shy smile crossing his lips as you place a gentle kiss on his cheek. His arm snakes across your naked waist, fingers lightly pinching your hip as you smile into his skin.
"Maybe. Drive safe."
Heeseung knows that Dr. Bahng told him to leave work at work. However, Dr. Bahng said nothing about bringing home to work. He said nothing about thinking about you at work, or missing you, or daydreaming about you instead of analyzing the reports that a pair of rookies messed up. He also said nothing about reading articles by some sketchy romance columnist on how to keep your relationship alive, which is exactly what Heeseung was scrolling through right now.Â
There are things in a relationship that must always be shared in order to avoid, or resolve conflict. How the other person is making you feel, how you are making them feel, and how to tackle both negative checklists properly. It is key to always remember that it must be you and your partner against the problem, not you and your partner against each other.
You make Heeseung feelâŠalive. You make him feel loved, cherished, and even at some bizarre times, worshiped. You make him appreciate waking up at the ass crack of dawn, your sleeping face relaxed as he peppers kisses across your warm skin â something he's thankful never manages to wake you up, but it adds to all the adoration he holds in his heart for you.
How does he make you feel? Dejected, neglected, rejected. Pushed aside for the true love of his life â work. You never bring it up unless he asks. You never brought it up until last July, when he was slumped in his office chair after drinking half a bottle of sherry whiskey, listening to music and thinking about yet another dead end that deterred him from finding Soyoung. You had approached him with a gentle gaze, a soft touch to his shoulder and asking about taking a shower together. You never questioned him, you never pressured him, you never tried to make him something you assumed he just wasn't â an attentive, doting husband.
And he remembers how he asked you, too. He remembers spinning around in his chair, stoically asking you if he was everything you'd ever wanted. Asking you if he was living up to your expectations, as a husband, as a life partner, as a friend, even.
And he remembers the way you sighed carefully before perching on his desk. "You're everything I've ever wanted, and I'm sure you'll continue to grow and be even more deserving of the love I hold for you." You had smiled, your hand coming to rest on his cheek. "Nothing we can't work through, you know? If I was given a choice in another life, another world â I'd still choose you."
He will never forget it, and he can still feel the warmth of your lips against his as you led him to the bathroom. He can still feel the ache of your love on his skin from the way you held him under the running water, quietly basking in his presence as the mint of your shampoo filled his nose. Nothing is as special to him as you are.Â
There are things that should routinely be shared in order to maintain a homeostasis of the calendar. Asking how their day was, if you have any ideas for dinner tonight, or if you'd like to do something this weekend to celebrate the mundane. It shouldn't be difficult to establish a routine with your partner, if you are in tune with them. A kiss goodbye in the morning, a warm embrace in the evenings. A shared meal, a shared bath, a shared bed.Â
Heeseung can't remember the last time he fully checked in with you â you always have something to do. You always attempt new creative projects, and his fingers toy with the fabric of his slacks as he remembers that you hand stitched them. He thinks about how you waited for him all night yesterday, and the disappointment you must have felt when he arrived late. He thinks about how he just doesn't make time to tackle the problem that you two are constantly glossing over by being intimate â he knows you don't feel loved.Â
He didn't ask you about your day yesterday, or the day before, or last week. He didn't ask you if you were sewing anything new, learning any new pieces on the piano collecting dust in the living room. He hasn't asked about your mother, but at least he knows you don't like to talk about her.Â
Heeseung hasn't asked you a single thing about yourself, or your life in a while â and he doesn't know how long it's been. Even last night, your eyes were focused entirely on him â the way his lips twitched when you said you liked the wine he chose, the way he pulled your leg over his in the booth you were sharing. You asked him about work, and he just shook his head as he pointed out the new menu items.Â
You love him so selflessly.
Something that works for my partner and I is parallel play. We aren't necessarily doing something together, but we are present in the same room and doing our own thing. Knowing that he is there, and that if I need him, I can reach for him, adds a comfort to our relationship. Aside from this, we also come together every two weeks and address any issues we may be experiencing â both in our relationship and our individual lives. We resolve the issues about us together, and advise the other on our personal issues. Balance!
You do this a lot. If Heeseung is home, you'll wander to wherever he is and sit down where you can, and quietly go about your business. Sometimes it's a new cross-stitch, sometimes it's just putting a headphone in and listening to music. Sometimes you're giving yourself a pedicure, sometimes you're just sitting there staring at his corkboard of paraphernalia while matching your breathing to his. It was subtle, something you thought he'd never notice.
He sighs, exiting out of the tab before grabbing his coat off the back of his chair. Tugging it on, he uses one hand to log out of his computer when he hears three knocks on the door. A lightness of the rapping knuckles similar to yoursâŠand your smiling face appears as you crack open the door. "Surprise?" He hates that he can't bite back his smile, a few of his fellow officers wide-eyed at his expression. He nods silently, and you extend your hand for him when you hear his coworkers whispering about you. With a dejected look, you tuck your hand back into the pocket of your jeans, "Guess we don't want them gossiping, right?" "Right." He mumbles, his own hand twitching around the doorknob as he pulls it shut behind him. He wants to reach for you, embrace the warmth you bring, show you off to the people he often calls his friends. Sunghoon catches his eye, a quizzical look on his face before shaking his head.Â
Heeseung reaches for you, but you've already made your way towards the door. Your smile has lessened as you open the door, holding it for him. "How was work?" You ask as he joins you in the cool air, and he wastes no time wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you in close, his nose buried in your hair. You hesitate to wrap your arms around him, instead leaning back to try and meet his eyes. "Hee?" "Don't ask me about work." He mutters, before pressing his lips to yours softly. You let out a noise of surprise, but you can't melt into his touch before he pulls away. "I hate talking about work, let's talk about you. Over lunch." He takes your hand in his, gently pulling you to his side as he makes his way to the car. He doesn't see yours in the parking lot, so he only assumes you got a rideshare before you clear your throat.
"Are you okay?" The words are slightly jumbled as he leads you to the passenger side, opening the door for you, helping you step in. "Hm? Why do you ask?" "WellâŠyou're actually out of the office. And you want to go to lunchâŠand you don't want to talk about work?" Your voice is meek, and it makes his chest ache as he reaches to buckle your seatbelt in for you. "I just want to spend time with you. Shall we?" His smile is a little forced, until he sees the soft gloss of embarrassment over your eyes. "Okay."
Tuesday, 6:23pm.
You don't really know what snapped inside of Heeseung over the weekend. He even took Monday off, turning off his phone after calling in sick and snuggling back into your embrace. He spent all of Sunday asking you random questions throughout the day, wandering around the house as you tried to pick up to start the week off fresh. He would hold the laundry basket so you could separate the clothing, he would hold the step stool so you could dust the corners of the living room â he even re-caulked the window in your bedroom because you were sitting at your vanity doing your makeup. He seemed restless to get all of these answers out of you, and while you didn't mind, you knew this attention was only temporary.
Duty called, after all.
HoweverâŠhe was home earlier than usual. He typically had his session with Dr. Bahng right after dinner time, but it seems your habit of making two portions is deemed fruitful tonight. He's sitting in front of you, having arrived home thirty minutes prior â showered and ready to share a meal with you. Just like he did this weekend, just like he did when your relationship first started out.
You remember sharing meals with him in your dorm room. Your roommate was almost never there, always spending time with her girlfriend â so you had free range of the entire place. Heeseung slept over almost every night, and the two of you would stay up at all hours of the night â whether it was discussing 80s cold cases or your major.
Your majorâŠit wasn't necessarily hard. It was one of those things that was only difficult if you didn't really like it, if you didn't have a passion for it. It was one of those things that took someone strong, both mind and body. You wanted to help better the world, see how things could change at your fingertips. You wanted to eat the world in one bite, and it simply wasn't possible â no matter your hard-earned master's degree or your passion for helping people. It was a time of realization â and it was funny, that you had the same qualifications as Dr. Bahng, but your career would never bear fruit like his.
You never really made a difference, like Dr. Bahng did. You didn't even get through to your husband like he did.
So when you came home one night a few years ago and saw Heeseung sitting at the table, waiting for you, you wondered if any of the people you helped that day would ever get to live content. You quit the very next day, your mind tortured over people you didn't know and things you couldn't control. It took a while before you got out of your head again â and even longer before you finally left your bed. It was this time when your relationship with Heeseung really tried to prove itself worthy of your time and effort â because though he wasn't home with you, to soothe your swirling anxieties and racing mind throughout the day, he was there.
He was there, with plates of fruit and warm tea. He was there, with a hairbrush gently forking through your matted hair. He was there, letting you cry yourself to sleep in his embrace and leaving early the next morning, with bags under his eyes. He understood, somehow, that you needed him more than ever before in those moments, and it seemed like that version of Heeseung was starting to reemerge â this time, without need.
"Are you hiding something from me?" You blurt, and Heeseung nearly chokes on his bite of food. Coughing, he reaches for his glass of water as you pat his back, offering him a napkin to wipe his lip. Taking a sip of water, he looks at you. "We haven't spoken all day and that's how you start a conversation?" He seems amused, a look you don't see on him often anymore. You can feel the heat of embarrassment crawling up your throat, and he pushes his plate forward, choosing to fold his hands on the table before he clears his throat. "I realizeâŠI haven't been the best husband." You can feel your eyes begin to roll, when he taps the table. "I have never been very good to you, and yet, you've stood by me. Through ups, downsâŠyou helped me out of a very dark place when Soyoung went missing." He clears his throat again, and your eyes catch the way he blinks back a few tears. "And I've given you near nothing in return." "Marriage is not transactional." You say gently, and he shakes his head. "Isn't it, though? In the eight years we've been together, you've given me so much. You take care of me, of our home. YouâŠYou can just do it all, and I admire it. I really, really do." He runs a hand through his hair, before reaching for your hand. You allow him to take it, and you hate to admit that a bit of skepticism is beginning to settle in your stomach.Â
"Why are you saying all of this? It's never mattered before, you know." Heeseung can sense something in your tone that you don't seem to catch. A hint ofâŠfrustration, anger, maybe even resentment. He knows you probably have more to say, and that whatever it was would most likely hurt his feelings.
He kind of wants you to, though, and you do â letting go of his hand. He folds them, his plate abandoned in order to take you in fully.
"Do you not want to talk about this? I can drop it, but it'll just come back up, honey." He asks gently, his head tilted to the side as he scans your face. You suck on your teeth, your fork pushing your food around before you sigh. "Maybe you're right." "About?" He straightens, his hands still folded on the table. You give him a guilty look, though he doesn't know what you could possibly have to feel guilty about.Â
"You're right, you haven't been the best husband. Hell, I don't think you've ever even really been a good husband, if we're being honest about it."Â
Heeseung doesn't react, and doesn't allow his face to move as you speak. He's finally broken the dam, because now you're rambling and you can't seem to stop.
"Was it ever going to be me, I mean, really? They say that being good to the people you love really takes no effort, that it's not hard to be doting and attentive to the person you love. You have such a hard time being here for me, you have the worst time detaching yourself from work and the cases you see everyday. You come home at whatever time is convenient for you, while I wait for you like an idiot." You blurt, and Heeseung breathes in carefully, so as to not startle you. He nods, closing his eyes.
He can sense the impending lump in your throat. He's never really seen you get angry â frustrated, irritated, even annoyed have all been emotions he's both seen and enticed. You've never been angry, you've never exploded on anybody.
"Do you ever think what your life would be like if Soyoung were still around?"Â
His eyes snap open at this, brow furrowing slightly but either you don't notice or don't seem to care, because you keep going.
"Do you think you'd even care about me if she was here? I get it, she's your best friend, maybe even the love of your life. I wouldn't blame you at all if I was just a placeholder until she was found."Â
He's watching your face as you speak, the way your lower lip trembles slightly and your chest rises and falls in shallow breathing. Your hands shake as you reach for the plate in front of him, shoving it under your own before standing up.
His chest aches at the idea of you thinking that anyone but you could ever be the love of his life, but can't bring himself to open his mouth and tell you.
"As shitty as it sounds, the more the years pass, the more I hope she's found. Maybe then you will truly have someone to love, someone who will fulfill your needs just as you like. Maybe then I won't have to pretend that I don't know I'm second to someone who isn't around." You murmur, and Heeseung feels his stomach churn a bit as you stand, taking the plates to the kitchen. You place them in the sink, holding the cool metal of the basin before turning back to him.
"I love you, Heeseung. I loved you then, I love you now, and I may love you for the rest of my life." You speak softly, stepping back to the table. You lean on the back of a chair, the necklace hanging around your neck mocking him in the dim light. "But me loving you, will never make you truly happy. I don't need you to tell me, you know? Knowing I can keep you company, knowing that you won't be alone, is fine with me. You don't need to love me."
You smile gently, the gloss on your lips sparkling. It's one of his favorites, it tastes like vanilla.
"You don't need to love me the way I love you, for me to know you care. So, don't worry about it. You don't need to check in with me, you don't need toâŠreciprocate." You shrug, taking the cups off the table, and turning back to the kitchen. You stop, looking over your shoulder. "And, Heeseung?" He can't bring himself to speak. He tries to clear his throat, but you proceed anyway. "Don't forget date night this Friday."
Thursday, 12:46pm.
You'd dropped by the precinct randomly, seeing Heeseung hunched over his computer from the entrance. The new receptionist asked you who you were here to see, and you gave his name, holding up the bag of food you brought with you.Â
"Lieutenant Lee doesn't take visitors." The receptionist rolls her eyes, and you hear Sunghoon before you see him. "Minseo, this is the Lieutenant's wife."
You whirl around to see your long-time friend, who smiles down at you. "Good to see you again. Dr. Lee." He speaks politely, making Minseo blush furiously as she prints a pass for you. She apologizes profusely, but you just shake your head and give her a warm smile, adjusting your purse on your shoulder.
"How're you, Hoon?" You ask as you paste the sticker onto your jacket, and he shrugs as he drapes his arm over your shoulders. "Could be better, could be worse. However, I did hear from a little bird that you and Heeseung got into a fight." Rolling your eyes, you know that Sunghoon is just stirring the pot. He seemed to have a sixth sense when it came to your relationship with Heeseung â seeing as he was the one who got the two of you together in the first place.Â
"We didn'tâŠugh, we didn't fight. We justâŠhad a conversation. I'll tell you about it, when are you off? We can get dinner." You say as the two of you reach Heeseung's office. He shakes his head.
"Don't put me in the middle. I'll text you though, we do need to catch up." He says, knocking on Heeseung's door for you. You hear your husband's tired voice, and Sunghoon opens the door. "You've got a special visitor."Â
You don't miss the way Heeseung's exhausted eyes look up at you, lighting up the moment they land on your face. You almost crack a smile at this, before Sunghoon shoves you in lightly. "Enjoy your lunch, Lieutenant." Heeseung doesn't say anything. The two of you hadn't really spoken since Tuesday night, and he certainly didn't expect you to come by today. Or any day, reallyâŠhe remembered the first time you ever dropped by the precinct. He'd welcomed you with a tight smile, before asking you to let him know beforehand next time. You didn't do it again, for years.
"Mind if I close these?" You ask, gesturing to the blinds, and he shrugs. He doesn't close out any of his tabs as you set the food down, kneeling on the couch lining the wall to close his blinds. He takes this moment to take you in. You were wearing his favorite dress on you, the pink one with the white-lined circle seams. You're shrugging off your jacket now that the blinds are closed, draping it over the chair in front of his desk. "I brought you lunch, I hope that's okay. I probably should have called ahead." You gesture to the bag on the table, but his eyes just peer over the monitor, his brow twitching up as you sit gingerly on the edge of the couch. He hadn't cleared up or refuted any of your points on Tuesday, but the guilt he felt that night was enough to make him sleep in the guest room. He didn't know that didn't make you feel any better, in your mind it just cemented your opinions as you let your pillow soak up a few stray tears.Â
"You look gorgeous." He murmurs as you unpack quietly, uncapping containers and sniffing them to figure out what is what. You stop, holding a bowl of broth to your face when you register what he said. "What?" "I said, you look gorgeous." He repeats himself, quickly typing up a rather unprofessional email to the rest of the precinct and letting them know he'd be leaving after lunch. He shoots it off, exiting the tab before standing up and stretching. His shirt is messily untucked, and he can feel your eyes on him as he twists to relax his back muscles. "Thank youâŠI think." He shrugs, ignoring the pang in his chest at your uncertainty before glancing over the array of food you'd brought with you. You seem a bit unsure about it all, but they're all his favorite dishes. He doesn't see any of yours â no soft tofu stew, no cold noodles, not even the tea you like. He keeps scanning your face as you prepare everything silently.
"Have you eaten already? I know you don't like any of these dishes." He asks, squatting next to you. You smile down at him, shrugging. "I'll eat at home. You left breakfast on the table this morning, so I figured you'd be hungry."
He had left breakfast on the table, but not for the reason you think. His morning routine consisted of showering, brushing his teeth and washing his face, putting his clothes on and, as creepy as it sounds, staring at you as you slept. He didn't kiss you this morning, like he usually did, but he desperately wanted to. So much so that he lost track of time just watching you sleep so peacefully, and had to run out of the house without it.
"I'm sorry, baby. I was in a rush." He pouts, and you just shake your head. "Don't worry about it. What's one day?"
It's everything. He thinks he feels your cold demeanor seep into his bones a bit, but your eyes are still warm as ever. Your smile doesn't reach your eyes, but your hand ruffles his hair lightly. He lifts slightly to sit next to you, and you press your lips to his cheek, your lipstick stamping on his skin. "You smell nice." He doesn't respond, his cheeks and ears tinging pink as you hand him utensils. Leaning back, you rest your head against the window sill, not noticing he's made no effort to even touch the food you've brought. Still, better now than never.
"I have something to tell you." You murmur, and he hums in response.Â
"I figured about as much." He leans back with you, holding a rice cake between his teeth before shoving into his mouth. "Do tell, Dr. Lee." You stare at your manicured nails, the french tip suddenly bothersome to your eyes. "I had an interview this morning, at the fifth precinct. In the next town over. "Â
He sits up, turning to face you completely. "Okay. How'd it go? I did hear that Dr. Park was retiring." Not a hint of malice in his voice, just pure curiosity. Encouragement, support.
"They said I can start next week. Three patients a day for two weeks, and then I will take over Dr. Park's patients as well. Well, those who want to transfer over." You don't know why you're nervous telling him this. His eyes scan your face, and you groan. "Why are you staring at me?" "You don't seem very happy about it." He says, tilting his head to the side as he bites into another rice cake. "I am happy about it. I justâŠit's a little far and I won't be home before you are on nights you're not set to see Dr. Bahng. I won't get to make dinner and I'll be out of the house before you are most days."Â
You stop yourself from rambling, watching as Heeseung looks at you intently. He glances at the food spread out on the table, before shoving the other half of the rice cake he bit into his cheek. "C'mon."
He gets up, yanking his coat off the hanger by the door, before opening it. "Where are we going? Heeseung, the food-" "Sunghoon, lunch on me." He calls out the door, before grabbing your jacket off the chair and your purse. Looking at you, he watches as you sit still, confusion on your face before he walks over, draping your jacket over your shoulders. "C'mon, we've got to celebrate. We can go to that French place you love."Â
Amused, you shove your arms through the sleeves of your jacket before standing. "Heeseung, you hate that place." Rolling your eyes, you reach for your purse, only for him to grab your hand and pull you in. His lips are on yours, a chaste kiss shared before he leans his forehead against yours.
"But I love you, and I'm proud of you. So let me show you, yeah?"Â
You blink up at him, before hearing Sunghoon's grunt of feigned disgust. "C'mon, guys, not in the office!"
"Shut up, man." Heeseung rolls his eyes, lacing his fingers in yours, and you hear the soft clink of metal. Ignoring the bickering between the two men, you look down, you see his engraved wedding band gleaming up at you, having knocked with an old silver ring of his that you'd taken after it stopped fitting him. "You're wearing your ring." "Hm?" He glances down at you, before smiling. "Oh, yeah. I figuredâŠI don't know. I like seeing it, it was silly of me to think the way I did about it."
Sunghoon scoffs at the sudden mushiness, and you look up to see half the precinct staring you down. Heeseung has your lipstick stamped on his cheek, and you feel embarrassed as the two of you get walked out by Sunghoon. Jungwon passes by, doing a double take when he sees the lipstick on your husband's face.
He smiles at you, a knowing look in his eyes as the two of you skirt past. Heeseung stops at the receptionist's desk, her smile disappearing the moment she sees your lipstick on his cheek. He asks her to cancel all his appointments for the day, and to let Captain Choi know that he would be taking the weekend off. She just nods, and Heeseung bids everyone goodbye with a whistle.
"She hates me, you know." You mumble, and he gives your hand a squeeze. âShe can hate you all she wants, doesnât change anything. Waste of her own energy.â
You donât know what to make of this. In a way, you think youâve forgotten your husbandâs demeanor. Heeseung squeezes your hand again, "Where's your car? Did you take a rideshare?"
His brow is furrowed as he scours the parking lot for your sedan, and you shake your head. "Saving gas, I have quite the commute." He scrunches his nose, before shrugging as the two of you make your way to his car.
He opens the door for you quietly, helping you up and going as far as taking your purse to hang behind his headrest. You always complained about the feeling of the straps against your neck when you leaned your head back.
"So." He starts, his fingers carefully turning the volume dial down as the soft jazz station he plays on his commute bleeds through the speakers. "SoâŠwhat?" "Why didn't you tell me you were thinking of going back to work? I thought we told each other everything." He says pointedly, as he makes a turn into the street. The light at the end is still green, if he speeds up a bit, he should make it. He sees you shrug out of the corner of his eye.
"Didn't think it'd be important. If I'm honest, I didn't think you'd notice." He doesn't like the twinge of sadness in your voice, but you clear your throat before he can mention it. "Should we take a walk later, as well? The weather feels great." "Yeah, honey. Whatever you want." He nods, his turn signal flicked by his ring finger, and he doesn't miss your eyes on his hands as he makes the turn. "Hee?" "Yes?" "I'm sorry." You murmur, making him glance at you quickly before you turn your head back to look out the window. Before you know it, he's pulling into an empty parking lot behind an apartment complex, ignoring the onlooking eyes of a woman taking her trash out. He parks carefully, turning the car off before turning in his seat to look at you.
"Sorry?" He echoes, and you peer over your shoulder at him. Your eyes are glossed over, and he huffs out a humorless laugh. "Oh, my baby. Come here." His arms wrap around you carefully, your hands coming to cover your face as he tucks you into his shoulder. "You have nothing to be sorry for, Y/N." "I do. I do, Heeseung. I was such a jerk on Tuesdayâ" Your muffled words stop as he pulls away, his warm fingers circling your shoulders and giving a soft squeeze. "No. You weren't a jerk, you were trying to communicate with me." "Still, Iâ" "No, Y/N. If anything, I've been a jerk." He huffs, letting go of your shoulders as his back hits the window lightly. "I've never been a good partner to you, and it's so incredibly unfair of me to think that you will just wait and wait until I just feel like being better to you." You blink at him owlishly, adjusting to tuck your legs under you. Your heels now sit on the car floor.
"I have never been good to you. No matter what it is, no matter where I am, I push you aside time and time again. It's likeâŠ" He stops, picking at his cuticles before sighing. "I love you so much. It's so hard for me to say and I still feel like some stupid teenager trying to figure out his feelings, but I know. I know I love you and I know you deserve to be loved far more than I can express." You rest your temple against the headrest, "Not everyone goes through what you did, though. I'd be foolish to think loving you would be an ordinary path." "And then you go and do that. God, you're so understanding and it kills me inside." He smiles pitifully, running a hand through his hair. "I want to deserve it. I want to come home and deserve the warm meals you make, I want to lay in bed with you and deserve your touch and your warmth and I want to deserve you."
His eyes sting with tears, and he hears a soft sigh from your lips. Lips he yearns for every second of the day, lips he loves to feel trail along his neck after a long day at work. Lips he pulls whines and moans out of, lips he kisses shimmery vanilla lip gloss off of.
You don't say anything, your fingers reaching for him in his lap. You interlock your hands, bringing his up to your lips and placing a soft kiss on his knuckles.
"I've thought about divorce, you know." You say quietly, his head snapping up to look at you. "What?" "Yeah." You breathe out, your fingers tightening around him. "I thought about leaving, I thought about taking one of the offers I've received in the last seven years for a job in the middle of a new city. I thought about packing up all my clothes, and phoning my mother for help. I figured, if she's my attorney, I can leave everything to you in lieu of me." Heeseung can feel his chest ache as you turn to look at him, your pearl drop earrings swinging with your hair as you do so. He feels like he's in a movie.
"But, I thought about being nineteen with you." "Nineteen?" "Nineteen." You laugh softly, your thumb now rubbing small circles into his skin. You place your other hand atop the pair, enveloping him in your warmth. "I thought about nineteen-year-old me, who saw nineteen-year-old you and felt the world come to a slow, slow stop."
You're staring up into the sky now, the odd sighting of the moon high in the sky at this hour was a good distraction. "I thought, what can I do to deserve him? What can I do to ease his pain, and help him hop through life until his answers are found, until he no longer needs me?"Â
"I'll always need you." He blurts, and you nod. "You're selfish like that." He silently nods in agreement, and you speak again. "You're a selfish lover." "I know." He mumbles, not able to look you in the eyes as you sigh. "But, I like it."
"I like that you're selfish." You repeat, and he gives you a quick look. "I like that even when I don't feel loved by you, you wouldn't survive without me. In lieu of me, who?" Your voice is sweet, but he knows your words hold a bit of bitterness. You like the idea of him being nothing without you, and he can't blame you for that. If you'd treated him the way he did you, he'd wish ill upon you until he no longer could. He'd hate you.
"Shall we go?" You ask gingerly, and he nods as he turns in his seat, letting go of your hand. You allow it, buckling in your seatbelt as he readies himself, turning the key in the slot before you clear your throat. "Heeseung?" "Yes?" He hates the eagerness in his voice. He hates how he's like a dog the moment you offer a crumb of your attention, but it's what he deserves. He wants to be a lovesick fool for you, he wants your every word to burn and weigh on him like the heat of a thousand fires.
Your gentle smile kills him as you look into his eyes, a shrug to your shoulders as you let the words slip.
"I love you."
Saturday, 6:43pm.
Thursday afternoon and all of Friday had been rather odd in your house.
Heeseung spent the days trailing behind you, even offering to take you out to shop for outfits for your new job in lieu of date night. You weren't surprised, though â he was always a fan of the way you styled yourself for work. Classy dresses, skirts that fell just below the knee. Long sleeved blouses with jeweled buttons, he felt like a Victorian man going nuts over the sight of your pantyhose-covered ankles.
Tonight, he'd made it a point to get slightly tipsy. You'd gone to a luncheon with your new boss earlier, so you'd arrived just as he was finishing up vacuuming the living room with a half-empty glass of bourbon and Stardust by Ben Webster played throughout the house. He wanted a bit of liquid courage for the conversation he knew the two of you had to have â that is, if he wanted things to start changing for the better.
"Hee?" You called from the foyer, watching as he spun to look at you, face slightly flushed from the alcohol. You let out a laugh, shrugging your coat off as he trekked the living room to greet you. "Babe! How was lunch? I figured I'd clean up here a bit, I know you hate when it gets messyâŠ" Heeseung rambled on about the housework as you gingerly stepped out of your heels, nodding along to his tipsy conversation. You left your shoes in the tiled foyer, walking towards the kitchen for a drink of your own. Heeseung had bought you your favorite sherry whiskey as a congratulatory gift on your new job.
"Wait, let me pour. You must be tired." He stops you from grabbing the bottle off the bar in the kitchen, choosing to skirt around you and open the fridge for a nice cube of ice. You liked two, he remembers. "How was the lunch? Did you eat?" You shrug, "I nibbled. It wasn't very good, it was at that Italian place we don't like." You scrunch your nose as Heeseung hands you your drink, making his lips curve slightly. "Funny, I was going to say we should give it another try." "No way, they fucked up my tiramisu. Remind me to never recommend that place to Sunghoon." You scoff, missing the way your husband's eyes trail your relaxed form as you lean against the counter. "And one of the other doctors was asking me so many questions about myself, it was so annoying. Like, we're not going to be best friends, man." "Like what?" He asks, listening to My Foolish Heart by Bill Evans Trio echo through the house. It was one of the songs played at your wedding, one of the first songs you and Heeseung ever danced to in college. "Oh, Dr. Lee, are you married? Oh, Dr. Lee, do you have kids? Oh, Dr. Lee, what does your husband do? Like shut up! Why does it matter, you're my husband, not his." You roll your eyes, not noticing the way Heeseung's cheeks flush at your words. Downing your drink in one go, you wince slightly, likely from the ice clinking against your teeth but you shake it off. "So, what do we want for dinner?" You poke at his side, and his arm reaches for you. You willingly bring yourself into his embrace, his arms looping around you gently as your fingers hold his t-shirt. "You look so pretty in your little outfit." "Dinner, Heeseung. Use your noggin." You roll your eyes, and he just peers down at you with an odd look in his eyes. Full ofâŠadmiration? "You're so beautiful." You feel your cheeks warm as you try to play off his effect on you, clicking your tongue. "I need you to focus here, Lieutenant. Me, your wife, would like dinner." "I heard you, baby." He nods, pulling you closer. You huff, but allow yourself to rest your head against his chest. The two of you had not beenâŠclose in this manner in a very long time â you couldn't possibly date the last time he held you like this, it was that long ago. You hate how easily you're melting into him, the warmth of his body, the gentle caressing of his hands to the rhythm of the jazz song playing in the living room.
"Should we get take out? We can watch that movie you like, the one with Al Pacino." He murmurs, carefully tugging the elastic out of your hair, releasing the curls from the ponytail you'd tied back earlier. You nod against him quickly, "And Keanu Reeves?" The two of you look at each other, and he can feel a laugh bubble in his throat at how excited you look as he nods. "Yeah." "Okay! Okay, I'mâŠgonna go change, and then we can get settled and stuff. Okay?" You blink up at him, your fingers already making quick work of the buttons on your shirt. His lip is tucked between his teeth as his eyes rake your skin, and you scoff, tugging your shirt to cover your chest. "Heeseung! Pay attention!" "I am, baby! I am paying attention!" He laughs, throwing his hands up in defense. "God forbid I want to look at you!" "You're such a man, ugh!" You stick your tongue out at him, turning on your heel when you hear him call after you. "Yeah, well, I'm your man. Deal with it!" You hate how his words make you feel like a teenager as you scamper to your bedroom, quickly discarding your work clothes into the hamper by the door. You can hear Heeseung speaking on the phone in the kitchen, soft thank yous from his lips as you unclasp your bra, sighing in relief as you dig through your husband's drawer when you hear him start walking down the hall.Â
"Jesus, warn a guy." He gasps dramatically from the doorway, and you roll your eyes as you tug one of his old band tees over your head. "Heeseung, you've literally eaten my ass." "You said you liked it!" He protests, and you snort. "It was okay. You act like you're so amazed by my boobs, you've seen them hundreds of times." You flip your hair out of the shirt, opening your own drawer to fish out a pair of bottoms.Â
"Doesn't make me love them any less." He shrugs, checking his watch. "We have twenty minutes until the food gets here." You look up at him, your fingers rooting through the drawer as you take in his avoidant look. He's nibbling on his lower lip as he stares up at the ceiling fan, leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed. You scoff, "Honey, we've been together for eight years. If you want to have sex, you can say that." "You make me nervous!" He groans, and you laugh out loud. "What has gotten into you, Lee Heeseung? One week you're begging to eat me out and the next you can't even look at me in my underwear! Are you alright?" You snort as you pull out a pair of his old basketball shorts, and he sighs. "UhmâŠOkay, fine. I want to talk about ourâŠsex life? TheâŠuhm, the way we kind of just skirt around all our issues with it." You blink, and you want to tell your heart not to get its hopes up at his words. This will all change in a week, your relationship is beyond fixing.
Right? "Okay. What about it? You don't like that we have sex when we can't communicate?" You nod, pulling the shorts over your legs and letting the waistband snap around your hips. He nods, fiddling with his watch when you put your hand on his wrist. "I need you to talk to me, Heeseung. You wanted to talk about this." "It'sâŠ" He breathes, running a hand through his hair as you pull him to the bed, sitting down as he slots himself between your knees. His fingers toy with the hem of the shorts you're wearing, clearing his throat. "I don't want you to think I don'tâŠenjoy it. I loveâŠbeing with you, in any way you'll have me." "Uh huh?" You interlace your fingers with his, his eyes avoiding yours. "IâŠwant to stop doing that. I know that it's a big part of how we stay connected, uhm, intimately. I know I haven't been making much time for you outside of the bedroom and that's something I want to work on." You can feel your heart pick up a bit.
"SoâŠyou want to stop having sex altogether? Or you'd like toâŠfight and make up?" You tilt your head, feeling a wave of nervousness begin to seep into your stomach. He shakes his head quickly, "I don't think I could everâŠI'd like to fight. A lot. As much as we need to." He blinks rapidly, eyes still avoiding yours when you nod slowly. "AndâŠyou want to have sex spontaneously? Do you want to schedule it? Do you want toâ" "I'm good with whenever. You can have me anytime you want, even if you don't want to have sex for the next year. I'm all yours, whenever." He interrupts, his cheeks burning pink as he clears his throat. You narrow your eyes, "Oookay. You know that goes both ways, right?" "I don't think you understand the willpower it takes not to be all over you every single second of my waking hours." His eyes are now squeezed shut, and you can feel your own cheeks warm as you feel his fingers flex around yours. You let out a soft ha, before nodding. "O-Okay, sure." "SoâŠwe're okay? Can we start taking things a little slower?" He asks with a wince, and you nod. "Absolutely." He nods, "Cool, cool. UhmâŠI'll wait in the living room for you, okay? I'll set up the movie." He pulls away with a gentle squeeze to your hands, a soft smile playing on his lips as he ducks out of the bedroom. You feel your stomach sink a bit, but out of relief. You feelâŠlighter.
You didn't mind the once-a-week sessions with Heeseung. He'd come home, the two of you would be particularly agitated â you because you felt pushed aside, Heeseung because of work, because he didn't have enough time for you, because he just wanted to feel some sort of peace. You'd try and start a conversation, only for him to push you back on the couch or the bed, or even the carpet in your living room and kiss you breathless. His tongue would slip into your mouth with practiced precision, his hand pinning your wrists above your head as he begged you to just let him take care of you.
You didn't mind because every touch from him was just right. His lips dragging against your jaw, his fingers shoved down your pants while he whispered sweet nothings. You don't know if Heeseung remembers any of the things he says during sex â how much he loves you, something he can't openly say when he's fully in his five senses. Despite feeling the way you did about your relationship with Heeseung, sex was never something you had to feel worried about â he would get just as drunk off you as he did his favorite bourbon. Sex with Heeseung was like a rollercoaster, even the very first time. He knew every button to push, every spot to caress, to kiss, to bite. He made you feel like you were swimming in a pool of lust and love and you couldn't help but cry during the middle of it all sometimes, only to feel his tongue carefully collecting your tears. "You're so pretty."
Shivering, you fan at yourself before sliding off your bed, making a beeline to your bathroom. Out of the corner of your eye, you see him softly swaying to yet another jazz song as he drapes one of your favorite blankets across the couch. You can't help but smile inwardly, shutting the door behind you as you look at yourself in the mirror. Sighing, you grab for your face wash, not able to stop thinking.
Heeseung does love you. He does, even if he's not good at saying it. He does, even if it means he bruises the stupid tattoo you got of his initials with how tight he holds your hips. He does, because he lets you claw at his tattoo of your initials on his shoulder. You still remember being drunk out of your mind when you stumbled into the studio to get them done.
And you remember that being the first sign that being with Heeseung was not temporary. You hadn't even had sex at that point in your relationship â choosing to cement your relationship with a permanent reminder. One that you knew was under his shirt even when his ring wasn't on his finger, one he knew was just under your panties even when you were mad at him for not spending time with you.
"Baby! Food's here!"Â You hear Heeseung call as you reach for your moisturizer.
Baby. A silly pet name you'd missed dearly, a silly pet name he'd used three times just today. "Coming!" You call, quickly wiping the sink of water and opening the bathroom door, scurrying out. He's sprawled across the couch, the containers of takeout spread out on the coffee table in front of him. His hand is messing with the remote, typing The Devil's Advocate into your Amazon Prime account.Â
"Hey." He murmurs, feeling you press a kiss to the crown of his head. He doesn't know why he's so nervous â he's literally seen you naked. You ruffle his hair, before rounding the couch and sitting gingerly on the floor. You didn't like to eat on the couch, Heeseung knew that. You slid in front of him, your shoulders pushing his knees apart as you rested your head on the left one. He says nothing, only leaning back as he presses play on the film.
The silence between you is comfortable. You're chewing carefully, soft gasps from your lips as if you hadn't watched this movie hundreds of times. He can't help but think if this was what he was missing out on while he was at work. You, dressed down in his clothing, holding your mouth open around a particularly overstuffed pork bun as Al Pacino dips his fingers into Holy Water.
"You're cute." He murmurs to himself, and you lean your head back slightly, a bit of hoisin sauce on the corner of your lip as you chew. "Hm?" "You're cute, babe." He shakes his head, wiping the corner of your mouth with his thumb. You blink at him, before twisting to look at him properly. Your brows furrow as you swallow, and you click your tongue. You give him a suspicious glance before turning back to the television, shrugging your shoulders as you lean back again.
He likes this. He could get used to it.
Heeseung cleaned up after you finished eating. He even ran the water for your shower, opting to go in after you. You'd pouted, asking him to go in with you â but he insisted he still had things to finish up before he could even think about winding down.
However, when you arrive in the bedroom with your hair wrapped in a towel and a baggy shirt over your shoulders, he can't help but take a peek. He sees the lavender trim of your underwear from his stance in the closet as you bend slightly to fish out a pair of sweatpants, his fingers tightening around the hanger in his hand. It breaks, the crack making you suddenly look up.
"What was that?" Your eyes are wide, scanning him as you pull out a random pair of shorts. He sheepishly hides his hand behind his back, shaking his head quickly. "Nothing, honey. Oh, I saw that you were running out of your serumâŠthing. The one for your hair, it's in the drawer." He pressed his lips together as he nodded, and you squint at him before opening the top drawer. Sure enough, the Biosilk bottle sits pretty, wrapped in the bag you knew was from the beauty supply store. You take it out, but see Heeseung grimace in the mirror. You peer at him, before seeing the broken hanger in his hand. Rolling your eyes,Â
"Maybe if you weren't so busy trying to get a peek at my underwear, you wouldn't have broken that." "Shut up." He scoffs, cheeks heating as he skirts out of the closet, throwing the hanger away in the trashcan by the door. You just shake your head, unwrapping the bottle as he appears next to you. "It's that one, right?" "Yeah, Hee. Thank you." You nod, placing it closer to the mirror. You look up at him through the mirror, noting the way he's gazing at you lovingly. "You're staring." "So?" He shrugs, and you scoff. "Get in the shower, Heeseung. I'm sleepy." "Don't fall asleep without me!" He presses his lips to your temple suddenly, and you don't get a chance to react before he's gone. You hear the door shut behind him, and you quickly grab your phone from its spot on the nightstand, abandoning the shorts you had in your hand on the dresser.
Msg To: Park Sunghoon [9:32pm] please please tell me you won't call hee in to work tmrw
You nibble on your lips, watching as Sunghoon reads the message. His chat bubble pops up, then goes back down.Â
Msg From: Park Sunghoon [9:33pm] i'll run it by the guys here in a bit, and i'll let you know. cool?
You don't reply, only giving him a thumbs up reaction. Setting your phone down, you move around for your night routine. Moisturizer, curl creamâŠbefore the large bed behind you calls your name as a siren does to shipwrecked pirates.
Flopping face down, you sigh into the pillow. You weren't ready to start working on Monday â you weren't ready to leave the comfort of your home, to talk to people all day about their problems again. You weren't ready for your mother to find out through her connections that you're practicing again.
You weren't ready to stop making two portions of dinner for your husband who wouldn't get home on time, you weren't ready to not be kissed all over in the morning even though he thought you were asleep. You'd never sleep through something so tender.
"Babe, I said don't fall asleep!" You hear Heeseung whine, and you groan into your pillow before flipping onto your back with your eyes closed. "I'm not sleeping! I'm justâŠresting my eyes." "That's sleeping." He's closer now, and you feel his lips press on your forehead. "It's fine, we have all day tomorrow." "If they don't call you into work." You grumble, and he pinches your cheek, before you feel your husband's lips brush the shell of your ear. "You should never trust Sunghoon to relay a message." "Fuck off!" You whine, shoving him away as you open your eyes. His hair has been dried, his bottom half tucked into a pair of flannel pajama pants. He's holding an old tshirt in his hand as he rounds the bed, "You're not planning on sleeping on top of the duvet, are you?" "Some of us get hot at night." You scowl, but a yelp gets caught in your throat as you feel him yank you to the edge of the bed by your ankle. You narrow your eyes as you look up at him, seeing your husband smiling down at you with a tilt to his head.
"Why the attitude, princess? Something wrong?"Â
He's talking down to you, something that makes your cheeks heat. You furrow your brows, scoffing as you prop yourself up on your elbows. His hand leaves your ankle, splaying on the skin of your thigh. "Why would anything be wrong?" He shrugs, his smile still digging into your very bones. "I figured I'd ask, since you begged Sunghoon not to call me this weekend." "Sunghoon is a rat, you know this. Remember when you pushed Jay's head into his birthday cake and Sunghoon immediately dogged you? Why would you believe him?" You try to rationalize your way out of answering his questions, but Heeseung nods as if he's understanding. "You're right, baby. I shouldn't believe him, someone who snitches everyone out because he believes there aren't enough honest people in this world." You scoff at his pointed look, knowing that Heeseung likes the little game you play. He likes cornering you, he likes giving you no way out. He likes the way your skin gets a little warmer under his touch.
"Okay, fine. I admit it!" You groan, falling back onto the bed. "God forbid I want to spend some time with my husband before I'm sent away." You drape your arm dramatically over your eyes, hearing Heeseung laugh above you. You hadn't had a night like this in so long, you can nearly feel the stupid butterflies from your college days floating back around you.
"You're going to work, you're not being shipped off to another country." He removes your arm from over your face, revealing your scrunched nose. He kisses the tip of it, seeing your cheeks bloom pink. "YeahâŠ" You sigh, before gently placing your hands on Heeseung's cheeks. He smiles down at you, "Yeah?" "I'll miss you." You admit, and his eyes soften as he captures your lips softly. His hands move to your hips, squeezing softly as he pulls back. "I'll miss you too, baby. It'll just take some getting used to." "Will you drive me on Monday?" You blurt, seeing his eyes widen as he nods quickly. "Absolutely. How early? Six? Seven?" You did not expect him to agree so fast. "Uhm, I have to be out of here by six-thirty to get there before the clinic opens." Your husband nods, and you watch the way his eyes move around as he does calculations in his head. "SoâŠwe'd be up by five?" He nods to himself, and you shrug. "You don't have to, I'm sorry I brought it up." "Kindly shut the hell up." He rolls his eyes, and you mimic his actions, pulling him back down to your lips. You don't say anything, only kissing him gently as his fingers toy with the hem of your underwear. You can tell he's holding back, not wanting to have this moment go like your usual nights together. He can't stop kissing you back though, and you can feel him slightly rutting against your leg.
"You're humping my leg." You whisper into his lips, and he shrugs, his fingers tugging down your underwear in one swift motion. "Don't care. Lie down." He pushes you back, quickly pushing your shirt up your chest until you get the hint and slip it off.
"What happened to taking it slow?" You tease as he kisses down your stomach, hissing as he nips just above your belly button. "This is slow, but if you want me to stop, I will." He looks up at you, eyes dark. You shake your head, earning another nip from his teeth.
"Words, princess." You flush deeper, nibbling on your lip as you speak. "Keep going." He raises an eyebrow, and you roll your eyes. "Please." "You're such a brat." He rolls his eyes, before sinking to his knees on the carpet. He pulls you closer to the edge of the bed by your knees, one of your legs over his shoulder as he kisses down your thighs. You're squirming, earning a quick slap to your leg. "Stop." "S-Sorry." You mumble, feeling him nose at your pussy. He inhales deeply, a groan from his lips as he places a soft kiss on your clit, a sharp breath caving your stomach in. "Pretty, always so pretty for me."Â
You don't get a chance to respond to his muttering, feeling his tongue drag purposefully through your folds. You sigh shakily, your fingers finding his hand that rested on your stomach. He laces your fingers together as he licks at you with an agonizingly slow place.
"F-faster." You whine, feeling him smile into your wet heat. "I said I'd take it slow, princess. You can wait, right? Be a good girl f'me." You suck in yet another sharp breath as his pouty lips wrap around your clit, his hand squeezing yours gently as you whimper. Your hips grind carefully against his tongue, taking all your willpower to not beg him to touch you more. "Missed you. Missed this." He murmurs, letting go of your hand to pull you impossibly closer, his arms wrapping around your thighs as he fucks his tongue into your aching center.
"M-Missed you." You whine, your hand finding home in his hair. "Pull it." He mutters into your pussy, and you tug harshly as he groans into you. The vibrations are torture, your whimpers filling the room. He takes his time, and you can feel your thighs threatening to close around his head.
"Want m-more. P-Please?" You gasp out, and you almost feel angry at the way your husband chuckles. "What happened to taking it slow? You're that needy? Can't cum like this?" You huff, yanking on his hair â earning a low moan. He obliges anyway, slipping his pants down as he stands. He towers over you, your eyes wide at his glistening lips as his hand snakes down between your legs. You shake your head, pulling it away as he laughs breathily. "Baby, I can'tâ" "I can take it. Please? I can, I promise." You beg, bringing his fingers to your mouth. He watches as you lick them clean, your tongue snaking around his wedding band. You're really and truly his for the taking, loving, fucking.
He shudders, leaning to kiss you softly. Your lips only taste of sin, your tongue sliding into his mouth with practiced ease. He groans quietly, his hard cock sliding against your soaked cunt as you whimper into his mouth. âPlease, pleaseââ
âI know baby, I know.â He murmurs, sinking into you slowly with a choked moan. Your fingernails dig into his shoulders, feeling your shaky breathing against his neck. He gives an experimental roll of his hips, relishing in the burn of your nails dragging down his back with a groan. Pushing your hands off him, he pins them above your head, interlocking your fingers.
"I love you." His lips are pressed to yours before you can respond, hips snapping at a menacing pace. Your breath gets caught in your throat, pressing your bare chest to his as he trails his mouth down your jaw. "Can never get enough of you." His soft whispers receive nothing but your whines, your hand squeezing his as he mouthed at whatever skin he could reach. "Could never ask for a better woman." He whispers into your ear, his teeth nipping tirelessly in efforts to burn himself into you forever.
"Can never get you off my mind. Think about you all day, baby." He lets go of your hands, circling his fingers around your thighs and spreading them further. You clench around him, your hands covering your face as a whine slips from his throat, fucking into you harder.
"W-Wanna live in this pussy, fuck." He groans, feeling your gummy walls tighten around him, his hand snaking down to play with your clit. Your moan is sharp, thighs threatening to close around his hips but he forces them apart as your eyes gloss over. "Need you to cum f'me, pretty. N-Need you to cream all over this dick." You open your mouth to speak, only to have it covered by his lips as he leans down to kiss you. He sucks on your tongue messily, feeling your fingers rake through his hair as you pull him back, mouthing at his neck. "W-Want you to cum inside m-me." You mumble, feeling his hips stutter against the swell of your ass, but he quickly falls back into rhythm.
"Y-Yeah? Fuck, want me to fill you up? I'll give you everything, baby. Anything you want, shitâ" He whines into your neck, spurred on by your soft whimpers of yeah, yeah â your nails dragging across his back once more, your fingers digging into his tattoo of your initials almost angrily. Your release rips through you with a loud whine, coating his thighs and soaking into the sheets, clenching like a vice around him as he straightens himself.
"Shit, honeyâ" His eyes are low as he tucks his lip between his teeth, pushing your knees to your chest as he pounds into you, pulling sobs from your throat as he fucks you through your orgasm. His head falls forward as he cums inside you, his fingers finding yours and squeezing like his life depends on it.Â
"Fuck." He mutters, pressing his forehead to your chest, the room filling with sounds of your panting and his lips trailing wetly along your shoulders and neck. "When did youâŠhave you ever done that before?" "I don't think so." You breathe out, and his skin feels sticky but he doesn't care. "WhatâŠ" He straightens, bearing his weight on his elbows as he peers down at you. You're glowing softly, your eyes slightly lower than when you'd started, lips swollen from his teeth pulling at them. "What changed? How can I be better?" Your cheeks flush deeper, shaking your head gently. "I don'tâ" "C'mon. What was it? You've never had complaints before." He says pointedly, and you smile. "Nothing to complain about, you always do well." "But?" He probes, his eyes locked on yours, and you sigh, pushing his hair off his sweaty forehead. "I don't know, Hee. I guessâŠI just like when you talk to me." Communication.
His eyes narrow as he thinks, thinking back to all the times you've had sex. He's sure he's spoken to you then, likely incoherent, pussydrunk babblesâ
"When you saidâŠ" Your voice fades, closing your eyes as you shake your head. "Nevermind." "I could never ask for a better woman."Â
It dawns on him, looking back down at you. Your eyes avoid his as you gently thumb at a red line down his shoulder, cause of your fingernails, but he tilts your face with his hand. His fingers squish the fat of your cheeks, a tear slipping from your eyes as he presses a soft kiss to your lips. "I could never ask for a better woman, my love." Your eyes flutter closed as he peppers kisses across your face, tears continuing to fall as he kisses your cheeks. "I love you, okay? I'm so fucking sorry for making you feel like you're not the most important thing to me in this world. I'd die for you, I'd kill for you, okay?" You nod silently, but your lip curls into a smile as he buries his face into your neck. "I'm not a thing, Hee." "Shut up." He whines, and you laugh. "I love you, too. I could never ask for a better man, ever." "God, don't. We won't leave this bed." He groans, and you nip at his earlobe, sucking it gently. "You promise?"
Monday, 5:32am.
He did promise.
You and Heeseung did not leave your bedroom once on Sunday. Well, he did â when he grabbed the food delivery you ordered, and to get you water on multiple occasions. You changed your sheets twice only to ruin them again, the sex messier and wetter the longer you and Heeseung went at it. He took everything you gave him in any position he could fold you into â but nothing beat seeing you laid out on your back, his fingers bruised into your hips and love bites blooming all over your body. He liked admiring you from above, sure â but he loved nothing more than his face shoved between your legs, suffocated by your warm, wet heat.
Your whimpers were burned into his mind, so much so he could hardly leave you alone when night approached. You practically had to beg him to get in the shower, his only request being that you join him.Â
By join him, he meant pressing you against the tiles and sinking his teeth into your neck and shoulders as he slid himself through your thighs over and over again. He bit down your back mercilessly, sinking to his knees behind you and lapping his tongue against your cum-coated cunt like a man starved.
Needless to say, the water ran cold and you had shampoo in your hair for an hour.
He didn't care, though. He kissed you deeply, wanting to feel every inch of you all over him before bidding you goodnight. He wanted to wake up early and make you breakfast, he wanted to pick out your pretty blouse and your heels. He wanted to be involved in your life.
"Rise and shine, baby." He whispered into your hair, holding a plate in his left hand as he pinched the fat of your cheek in the other. You groan, pushing his hand away as you roll onto your back. The duvet slips down, revealing your bitten skin. He caresses it gently, his eyes glued to your face as he goes lower. Your hand catches his wrist before he can cup your breast, peeling your eyes open reluctantly.
"I can't let you near me, you'll fuck me into the mattress." You mutter, making him smile. "Maybe don't beg me to cum inside you, and I'll leave you alone." He holds up the plate in his hand, his chest swelling at your blushing cheeks. "I made breakfast, can you get up now? I want to pick your clothes!" Your eyes widen slightly as you sit up, letting the duvet pool around your belly button as you wipe at your inner corners. "Really? You want to?" "I love seeing you dressed up for work, babe. Can I? I'll make it pretty, I promise." He draws an x over his chest, and he notices how you can't bite back a smile as you take the plate from him. He turns away as you reach for the bedside lamp, clicking it on as he practically skips into your shared closet.
"You're really chipperâŠ" You trail off, shoveling a peach slice into your mouth. He shrugs, holding up two shirts before putting them back. "It's your first day, and I read something a few years ago about marital ambiance. If I'm in a crappy mood, it'll rub off on you. We can't have that, can we?" He smiles widely as he pulls out a black dress you hadn't worn in ages â the sleeves were long and slightly flared, and the flowy skirt ended just above your knee. The neck was high, so you wouldn't be exposing any of your weekend shenanigans. "This one? Haven't seen this in, what, two years?" "We can try that one, yeah." You speak around a mouthful of oatmeal, and he nods as he turns to your shoes. "Are you walking a lot? Or can we go for the Hot Chicks?" He holds up the black leather heels, and you just smile and shake your head. "I'll take my slippers anyway, so we can go with the Hot Chicks."Â
"I checked the temperature outside, it'll be a little chilly until lunch time. Do you want pantyhose? Stockings?" He drapes the dress over his arm as he worms out of the closet, placing your shoes on the dresser as he opens a drawer. You like the sight of your husband like this. Excited for you, eager to see you take a step forward after being (willingly) stagnant for so long. You were afraid that maybe he'd discourage it â you'd overheard him talking to Sunghoon once about how your last job nearly made you lose your mind, and how worried he'd been about you.
He wasn't wrong, either â the fact that your impact felt so minuscule just made you feel like you were at home away from home. It felt like your marriage at the time, it felt like you were sixteen again talking to your mother about your dreams and being shut down. It felt bad, ugly.
You finish your breakfast and get dressed as your husband gets ready, his suit jacket the exact same shade of black as your dress, his button-up that cherry red that makes you ache with want. His slacks are pressed, his hair carefully styled as he appears behind you moments later, holding a flat iron to your head.
"No curls today, babe?" He leans against the doorway, and you smile shyly. "No, I think I want something sleek. The curls are not looking too good this morning." "Yeah?" He's not listening, running his eyes down your backside. "Hee. Stop." "I'm just looking, baby." He smiles, and you ignore the way his eyes raking across you make you feel warm. "Well, stop looking. I can't be late, not today." "So, tomorrow?" He asks, and you scoff as you pull the iron down the last strand of hair, running over the ends twice before tossing it over your shoulder. You roll your eyes, unplugging the tool as your husband's hands run over your ass, giving it a gentle squeeze. Swatting his hands away, you leave the iron to cool as you turn around.Â
"Heeseung, I'm serious." You're nose to nose with your husband, who only smiles down at you. "One kiss." "In the car, after my lipstick, when you drop me off." You propose, and he shakes his head. "Right here, right now, before your lipstick and you let me go down on you." "You're insane!" You laugh, pushing him out of the way â but not before he lands a soft smack to the swell of your ass. "Stop! Let me get ready!" "Fine, fine! I'll make coffee." He scoffs, turning on his heel and going down the hallway.Â
You shake your head to yourself, wandering back into your bedroom and slipping your jewelry on. Small gold hoops, the same necklace you wore every single day. Your wedding rings, one silver ring with the letter H on your middle left, and one on your right pinky with Heeseung's and your birthstones. A watch that was a gift from your father on your graduation day, the leather band slightly worn and molded to your wrist.
You hear a soft whistle from the doorway, and look up to see your husband biting his lip. "Are you sure you can't be a little late?" "Dude." You roll your eyes, watching Heeseung set down your silver tumbler on the dresser. He slides behind you as you check your earrings carefully, pressing his hips into your ass. âDid you call me dude yesterday? Couldâve sworn it was another word that started withââ
âHeeseung, youâre on thin ice.â You glare at him through the mirror, feeling him grind against you. âItâs almost like I can still hear you.â He hums against your shoulder, pressing a quick kiss before moving your hair out of the way, trailing gently up your neck and nipping at your ear.
âPlease, daddy. Want you so bad.â He mocks you, watching your expression change in the mirror. You huff, your cheeks burning as you look away. âDonât be shy, it was cute. Youâre cute, baby.â
âStop.â You murmur, before feeling his hand gently tilt your face towards his. He kisses you deeply, moving his hand lower slowly. Squeezing your neck softly, you whimper into his mouth before he pulls away, biting your lower lip and watching it spring back. âWeâll run this back later, yeah?â
You nod, earning a smile and a chaste kiss. âCâmon. Itâs almost six-fifteen.â
He pushes off of you, his hand lingering on your hip before he leaves the bedroom. You sigh shakily, your fingers fumbling for your lipstick as you hear him jingle his car keys. You shove it into your dress pocket, grabbing your shoes and coffee cup off the dresser and exiting the bedroom.
You shove your shoes on as you reach the foyer, watching Heeseung pull your coat out of the hall closet. âI prepped your bag before I made breakfast, can you check it?â
Everything is there. You let him slip your coat on, pressing a kiss to your cheek and carefully fixing your hair. âWhat time are you off?â
âIâll call you?â You say, and he nods. âTen minutes before?â
âYou got it.â
Neither of you say much else as you take a deep breath, opening your front door and stepping out together. You hold Heeseungâs sleeve as he locks the door, your other hand gripping the tumbler he prepared for you.
He turns, interlocking your fingers with his and bringing your knuckles to his lips. âYou ready?â
You smile nervously, âReady as Iâll ever be.â
Heeseung dropped you off a minute to seven, and even walked you to the doors of your clinic. He waited patiently as you applied your lipstick, puckering his lips cutely for his kiss goodbye. You pressed another to his cheek for good luck.
The day went smoothly. Your first two patients were two young men, both in their early twenties. One with dyed blond hair, the other with a dark brown perm. Both had tired eyes and chapped lips, bitten fingernails. The blond had a tattoo of a girlâs name on his forearm, the brunet two rings through his eyebrow.
Heeseungâs habit of jotting down small details has rubbed off on you.
Your last patient was set to arrive any minute, and you found yourself feeling uneasy. You kept changing the music you played, settling on Paradise by Sade. You smoothed the felt on the patient couch several times, even drawing a pattern in the fabric before hearing the soft knock on the door.
âCome in!â
A woman opens the door a crack, dark brown eyes peering in. Thickly lashed and lined with kohl, she presses her lips into a thin line before opening the door wider. You stand, smoothing your dress before offering your hand.
âIâm Dr. Lee. You must beââ
âIâm Jeon Chaeyoung. Itâs on my file.â She mutters, bypassing your extended hand. She sits on the edge of the couch, and you brush it off. A lot of patients were standoffish at first â getting comfortable with someone you were going to share your problems with was always something difficult, you understood that.
âYes, I know. Iâm glad to meet you, Iââ
âCan we just get into it? I donât want all the formalities.â She cuts you off, and you try not to look discouraged as you settle into your chair. âOf course. Why donât you tell me about yourself?â
She sighs, picking at her maroon polish. Something about her is off, something is oddly familiar, but you donât know what. You notice her widowâs peak has been shaved off, and her teeth are a little too well shaped not to be veneers.Â
âWell, Iâm twenty-eight. I dropped out of university when I was nineteen, and I left my hometown at the same time. Havenât spoken to anyone since, and I moved to this town last year with my husband.â
You nod slowly, tapping your pen against your notepad. You glance at her file, seeing that she had a few name changes in the last three years. Twice â Jeon Chaeyoung, before that she was Cha Chaeyoung.
Before that, Cha Soyoung.
You choke on your saliva, coughing harshly into your fist. She looks startled, her hands out as you reach for the pitcher of water on the coffee table. You pour shakily, coughing off the side before picking the glass up and taking a sip.
âS-Sorry, sorry. Had a little something. You moved here last year?â
Her eyes are suspicious as you pour another glass for her, sliding it across the table. She takes it tentatively, taking a small sip before holding it in her hands.
âYeah. IâŠran away, I guess. I felt so much pressure from everyone around me. My mother wanted me to be a bigshot lawyer, my father wanted me to take over his company on top of that. My best friendâŠâ She trails off, and you hope she canât sense how nervous you are.Â
âHeâŠugh. He was so patient and understanding, and he tried so hard to understand me. He was there for me through every bad moment of my life â my mother pressing me to be successful, my father wanting me to take over his company. I couldnât handle it.â
âSo you left. You left everything behind and you started anew.â You say slowly, and she nods, her eyes teary. âI even changed my name. I knew he would look for me, I just disappeared without telling anyone. I think he gave up, but I stillâŠâ
She wipes at her nose, and you quickly offer tissues from the table. She takes a few, dabbing at her eyes before the kohl can run. She has the same look in her eyes as your first two patients â tired, scared. Even a bitâŠremorseful.
âI got surgeries to change the way I look, you know. I have a nose job, can you tell?â She turns to the side, and you can. You can tell, the way her nose no longer has the soft button look, but the straight bridge with pointed tip. But she doesnât know you know that.
âNot that youâd know, sorry.â She laughs nervously, balling the tissues in her hands. You smile warmly at her. âI got my teeth done. And I even got half a syringe of filler in my lips.â
She puckers them, the clear gloss still shiny against the pink skin. You nod, âThey look good, though. How do you feel about the changes? Do you feel more confident?â
She shakes her head, âNo. I did itâŠto hide, I guess. I didnât want my best friend to find me, I didnât want anyone to find me. I went into hiding as long as I could, hoping my parents would just forget about me.â
âMmh. I saw your file, and you said youâveâŠchanged your name. Why, exactly? Did you want to leave behind the person that wasâŠSoyoung?â You tap the file, trying not to show the way her name makes your tongue taste sour, and she sighs. âThey opened a Missing Persons case for me. It made everything a lot harder, you know? I just wanted to disappear and start a new life doing something menial. I know it sounds stupidââ
âStupid?â You scoff, crossing your legs. âNothing you feel is stupid, Chaeyoung. Everything and anything youâve ever felt is valid. The need to run when things get too stressful, wanting to hide away from societal pressures. Everything, itâs valid.â
She lets out a shaky sob, covering her mouth as she breathes in. âIâm sorry.â
âDonât be sorry! Youâre just a human being. No one can get upset at you for not knowing how to navigate everything, this is your first time on Earth.â You shrug, and she peers up at you through teary eyes. âCan you tell me about yourself? M-Maybe itâll be easier to get comfortable.â
âSure!â You smile, eager to give her an update on Heeseung, despite her not knowing. âIâve been married for seven years. I met my husband when we were nineteen, and we started dating a little after that. I was a stay-at-home wife for the last few years, because my jobâŠâ
She stares at you intently, and you rub your neck. âI didnât feel fulfilled. My mother, quite like yours, had a lot of pressure on me. I was her only daughter, and she wanted so much. She wanted me to marry for money, and she wanted me to pursue a law degree.â
You smile sadly, and she nods. âDid you marry for money?â
âNot at all. I made more than my husband did in my first year as a therapist.â You laugh, remembering how you and Heeseung cheered as the two of you finally had enough saved for a new mattress. It was a silly stepping stone but the two of you were ecstatic.
âWhat does your mom think of you now? Do you keep in contact with her?â She tilts her head at you, and you shrug. âI donât care what she thinks, and she doesnât speak to me. She works distantly with my husband, so he sees her more often than I do. Sheâs an attorney for the city we live in.â
Chaeyoung nods, slowly. She pulls her phone out, typing quickly and scrolling before turning her screen towards you. Itâs a picture of her and Heeseung smiling as kids. Theyâre dressed as Team Rocket from PokĂ©mon, posing with V-signs next to their winked eyes.
âThis is him. Heâs my best friend. I havenât spoken to him since I left.â She sniffles, and you canât hide the way your smile falters. You feel your stomach sink a bit, realizing that she would always know Heeseung far more than you ever would. She grew up with him, she matched Halloween costumes with him. She held his hand trick-or-treating, she dyed his hair for the first time in grade nine.Â
She kissed him when they were seventeen, for the first time ever.
âAre you okay?â She asks, pulling her phone away. You nod quickly, âYeah, yeah. Sorry, I just had some memories. I was super into PokĂ©mon as a kid, but I moved around a lot and could never make friends over it.â
Itâs not a lie. You collected the cards, played the video games, and watched the Indigo League.
âDo you and your husband have kids? My husband wants to have kids soon.â She mentions, and you shake your head. âNo, not yet. We talked about it yesterday, actually.â
You had, in depth. While you were eating the shitty takeout from the diner down the road, heâd asked you. You admitted that you were open to having kids, but wanted to fix your marriage first. He agreed, but mentioned that getting off your birth control would take time to get used to. You nodded in response, saying youâd make an appointment with your doctor and the two of you could go from there.
âBut us, first. Okay?â Heâd said, holding his pinky out to you. Youâd smiled and linked your fingers, âUs first.â
âThis is my husband. His name is Jungkook.â She pulls up a photo of a particularly tattooed man, pressing his lips to her temple. He has a lip ring, and several rings through his ears. âHeâs cute! Do you feel loved? Fulfilled?â
âFunnily enough, I do. I donât feel any of the stress or pressure to beâŠperfect. HeâŠgets me. He engages me, he makes me laugh. We dance together a lot, he sings me to sleep.â She nods, smiling at the photo. âCan I see your husband? Or is that too far?â
You try not to show your hesitation, but the words tumble out before you can stop them.
"Maybe next time, yeah?" She nods quickly, a blush spreading across her cheeks. "I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortableâ" "Not at all! My husband is just particular, you know. His job stops him from really being a prolific person." You smile, shaking your head as you tap your notepad. It's true, you and Heeseung hardly posted things about yourselves or your relationship on social media. Your friends were all very private due to the nature of their jobs, and it'd do you well to follow that.
The rest of the session goes on without many more slip-ups. She focuses on telling you about her relationship with her husband, how he proposed. Their intimate elopement in his hometown, with just his friends and their girlfriends. You can't count how many times you heard her mention a couple named Jimin and Jeongyeon.
You can't focus on anything but the color of her eyes. How deep they are, how much of her story they hold. You're certain Heeseung would be able to figure her out in a split second, just by looking into them.
"You're very good at this, you know." She says as she tugs her jacket on, and you don't remember her ever taking it off. The hour she booked is almost up, and she looks a lot lighter than when she came in. You can feel the weight of her confessions, the weight of knowing she was alive and well after years of searching for her on your own shoulders.
You don't know if, or when, you should, or could â tell your husband.
"Good at what?" You tilt your head, and she gives you a quizzical look. "At creating a nice environment to share my struggles. I know I mostly talked about my husband, butâŠit felt nice. To tell someone about him and not have them tell me they already know that about him." You smile inwardly, knowing exactly what she means. "Yeah. My husbandâŠhis best friends are also mine. Can't really talk about all his weird little habits without them knowing exactly what I'm talking about." "Oh? You don't have friends of your own?" She tilts her head, and you laugh. "I mean, yeah. But I tend to spend most of my time with my husband. It's likeâŠa really good amusement park. I wanna go on all the rides with him, you know?" She smiles, but you see a slight flash of judgment in her eyes. Feeling your cheeks burn, you clear your throat, closing her file and putting it on the table. "Should I expect to see you here next week, Chaeyoung?" "I'd like that, Dr. Lee. My husband said he'd wait for me, so I'm going to go ahead and relieve him." She nods, before standing. You do as well, walking her to the entrance. She turns on the steps, "Thank you for listening to me." "Any time, Chaeyoung." You bid her a goodbye, watching as she walks out of the clinic with her hands in her pockets to a black station wagon. Leaning on your doorframe with your arms crossed over your chest, you see her husband get out, seeing the way he towers over her. He smiles down at her, tucking her hair behind her ear before pressing a kiss to her forehead. You can make out his lips asking How was it?Â
And her own saying I'm coming back next week. I really like this one, honey.
You feel your chest ache as he opens her door, pressing another kiss to her cheek as she pulls her seatbelt on. He shuts the door, and circles back to the driver's side. He looks up, catching your eye. He tilts his head, before smiling and opening his door. He gives you a quick wave, and you put your fingers up as he reverses out of his parking spot.
It looked so easy for them.
She looked so easy to love, he looked so eager to love her. Did people look at you and Heeseung that way, too? Did they think that about you? Sighing, you turn into your office, stretching your arms over your head. You moved around, tidying up as the music you played switched to something that reminded you more of your husband â specifically, No Song Without You by HONNE.
He'd played this song almost every day when the two of you began dating. You remember this song playing in the restaurant you had your third date at. You remember this song playing in the car when he picked you up for your twentieth birthday. You remember this song playing when he asked you to be his girlfriend, and ending just moments before he kissed you for the first time. You remember this song playing when he took you out to the flower field he proposed in. You remember his teary eyes as he knelt down before you, one of the biggest displays of emotion you'd ever seen in him. Most of all, you remember him saying there is no him without you.
You don't realize you've been standing in the same spot for the last two minutes until you hear your phone ring on the desk. You rush to it, picking up the call before even looking at the caller ID.
"This is Dr. Lee." You say, fumbling with Chaeyoung's file and the cabinet. You open it before hearing your husband snort on the other end. "Hello, Dr. Lee. This is Lieutenant Lee, I'm calling on behalf of your taxi service." "Yah! You're not my taxi." You scoff, shoving the file into the J section. He laughs, "I'm outside, baby. You didn't call, so I got worried. I picked up something light, are you almost done?" "Shit, I'm sorry. D'you want to come inside? I still have things to wrap up." You screw your eyes shut, your fingers rubbing at your temples. "Yeah, sure. I'll be right there."
It doesn't take long for your husband to appear at your door, holding his badge in his hand as you type on your computer. You give him a quizzical look, before turning back to the screen. "Did the janitor give you a hard time?"
"You could say that." He shakes head, setting his keys and phone down on your coffee table. He's holding the bag of food in his hand, and you gesture to the room. "It's nice, isn't it?" He looks around, putting the bag on your desk before opening it. "It's a lot bigger than your old office. I like the greenâŠis that Take Me by Miso?" His ears perk at the new song playing through the speakers, and you sigh, nodding your head as you slump in your chair. He nods along to the song before rounding the desk, and pressing a kiss to your hairline. "You don't look very happy, honey. Did something happen?" His hands find your shoulders as he stands behind you, and you move your mouse all over the screen. "Nothing, I'm just rebooking a patient. SheâŠsomething about her. I don't know." You know your conscience won't let you hide this from Heeseung very long. Granted, you're protected by the law if you do tell him, and it's the right thing to do.
Something in your heart doesn't feel right.
"Jeon Chaeyoung." He reads, and you nod. "Jeon Chaeyoung." "What's her deal?" He asks, making you pout up at him. "If I tell you, I'm violating our patient-provider contract." He gives you a confused look, before leaning down, brushing a kiss to your cheek. "I'm sensing a but, here." You sigh, exiting the schedule and turning the monitor off. "Let me make a scenario for you, yeah?" You stand, kicking your heels off as you walk onto the carpet under the coffee table. He nods slowly, before moving to the patient couch, taking a seat as you pace.
"Let's say, you're looking at someone in a line-up, yes?" You turn to him, and he nods. "Okay. What am I looking for?" "Something familiar. You know the perpetrator and you've known them for ages. I mean, damn near your entire life."Â
Heeseung's eyes scan your face, before humming. He leans back, resting his elbows against the back of the couch. "We have a saying about eyes, I guess. That they never lie, you know. Eyes are the windows to the soul and what not."Â
"So if I show you a picture of me and a bunch of other people, and cover everything but our eyes, you'd know which one I am?" You feel like you're starting to sound a bit like a maniac, but your husband nods. "Of course I would. I love your eyes. I look at them all the time."
You nod quickly, before breathing out shakily. "When you were nine, what did you dress up as for Halloween?" "What?" He scoffs out a laugh, "What does that have anything to do with what we were just talking about?"
You kneel in front of him, and he sits up quickly, taking in your serious expression. "Babe, what is going on?" "Did you match with Soyoung?" You murmur, picking at his slacks. "Were you Jesse from Team Rocket?"
Heeseung's brow furrows as he takes your hands, the clink of your rings grabbing your attention. "Y/N?" "It's her. She changed her name and she changed her face but it's her, Hee. I know it is, I can tell by her eyes and she showed me the two of you dressed up for Halloween as kids. That picture your mom has framed in her office." You squeeze your eyes shut, sinking back from him. His fingers squeeze yours gently before he scoffs. "Y/NâŠHoney, I really, really need you to think about what you're telling me right now." "I am, Heeseung! This is just as important to me, you know that! Countless sleepless nights, thousands of posters put up every single weekend just for her to waltz into my office today and tell me about her life!" You rip your hands from his, standing and walking to the file cabinet. You fish her file out, opening it and thrusting it into his hands.
He takes it reluctantly, his eyes scanning the file with a frown on his lips.Â
Emergency Contact: Jeon Jungkook â Cell: 010-1997-090 Work: 010-2013-0613 Relationship to Patient: Spouse
"She's married." He mumbles, flipping to the next page to her insurance information. He sees her name changes, before and after her marriage. His tongue pokes his cheek gently as you sit next to him, your ankles crossed as you sigh.
"This is rather anticlimactic." You mumble, leaning your head against his shoulder. He hums in response, thumbing the print of her electronic signature. "She never used to write her C's like this." He flicks the file, before closing it. "What happens now?" Your voice is no higher than a whisper, and you feel him sigh before leaning his head on yours. "Nothing. Legally, she doesn't have to report her reappearance. She's an adult." You look up at your husband, who has a surprisingly underwhelmed look on his face. He's nibbling on his lip as he gently tosses the file onto the coffee table. You rest your chin on his shoulder, scanning his face before he looks down at you.
"You seem tired." You say softly, and he closes his eyes. "I am. I'm so tired, honey." "You don't feel any sort of way about this? I can refer her to another clinic. I canâ" "I just want to go home, Y/N." He shakes his head, his arm coming to wrap around your shoulders and pulling you into his chest. You allow it, moving to sit in his lap and feeling his hands drop to your waist. "I don't haveâŠI can'tâŠ" You look down at him, seeing the way he angrily blinks back tears as he tries to find the words he needs. Your hands gently cup his cheeks as he sighs frustratedly, burying his face in your chest. You can feel your stomach flip as he tries to breathe deeply, his shoulders tight as you wrap your arms around them. He sniffles, resting his forehead on your clavicle, your fingers playing with the hair at the nape of his neck.
"Is it wrong to be angry at her?" He mumbles shakily, and you quickly shake your head. "No. She left, and she told me it was willingly. She came back, just a thirty-minute drive from home and she didn't tell you. You're allowed to be upset." "Then why do I feel shitty about it?" His voice trembles as he looks up at you, teary eyes full of resentment and bitterness, but behind it all is a 19-year-old boy who lost his best friend from night to the morning. You coo softly, your thumb moving to swipe under his eye as he pouts.
"Because you wanted things to be different. Finding out she's okay through meâŠprobably wasn't the way you imagined it'd happen. Maybe you had an idea of her showing up to the precinct, or to your parents' house looking for you. Maybe you saw that she's married to someone else and it hurts you, maybe you have some underlying feelings." You shrug, not noticing the way your husband's eyes narrow at your words.
"Y/N, are you hearing yourself right now?" He scoffs, gently pushing you away from him. His hands rest on your thighs, nibbling on the corner of his lip as you give him a confused look. "What?" "Did you just seriously try and equate my feelings about this entire situation to me having some sort of weird fantasy about being with her?"
You blink twice, only for Heeseung to huff out a humorless laugh before gently removing you off his lap. He stands, grabbing his keys and wallet off the table before tapping the file. "Let's go home." "Heeâ" "Let's go." He sighs, fingers grabbing the bag of dinner that you're sure had gone cold by now. He waits by the door as you gather your things, holding your coat in his hand as you slide your heels back on. "Heeseungâ" "Turn around. It's cold outside." His voice isn't harsh or mean, but you can tell he doesn't want to speak unless it's absolutely necessary. You reluctantly let him slide your coat on for you, feeling his lips pressed to your temple quickly. He opens the office door, carefully pushing you out first and turning the lights off behind him.
"Can I drive?" You hold your hand out for the keys, and he sighs before dropping them in your hand. You walk quickly towards the exit, not bothering to bid the janitor a good night as you nearly threw the door open. You could feel your stomach turn as you reached the car, Heeseung still trailing behind you when his voice cut through the air.
"Walking that quickly won't get you away from this conversation, babe." You tongue your cheek, waiting for your husband to appear next to you in front of the SUV you shared. His hand squeezed your hip gently, before pulling you close. "What are you running from, hm?" The conversation where you tell me that our marriage is over and you want out because your best friend is back in the picture, you think. You shrug, shaking your head as he pulls open the driver's side door. He sighs as you skirt around him, pulling yourself into the seat without his help. He doesn't let you close the door, wedging himself in to buckle in your seatbelt for you.
"You say some really fucked up shit sometimes, you know." He murmurs, and you feel your cheeks hot as you reach around him to stick the keys in the ignition. His hand on your cheek stops you, forcing you to look at him. "I thought we said we'd work on this. On us." "I don't want to do this here." You reply shortly, not recognizing your own tone of voice as your husband's eyes widen before he tongues his cheek. "Fine." The drive is silent, the radio turned off by your fingers the moment you managed to get the car started. Heeseung sits in the passenger side, staring out the window with a tick in his jaw you'd only ever really seen a few times, but you remember most during your first fight. It'd been two days before your first anniversary, and it'd been over the dumbest thing ever â his phone dying and you freaking out when he showed up late to your early celebration. He'd apologized profusely but you didn't want to talk about it then, just like you don't want to talk now.
Heeseung is out of the car before you even manage to park fully, careful not to slam the door as he rounds the car, opening your door and taking your bag. You reluctantly let him help you down, and he takes the keys to open the door without a word. Your home is still warm and inviting, but something about the cold demeanors floating around the two of you makes it feel like you're not even there.
"Are you hungry?" He asks quietly, and you shake your head. "No." "You had lunch at noon, why are you lying?" He scoffed, pulling his jacket off as you tongued your cheek, "I'm not. You're just assuming things." "What is the problem, Y/N? Suddenly SoyoungâŠChaeyoung reappears and you want to act like this? Did we not just have several lengthy conversations about fixing our relationship?" He grabs your elbow gently as you move to walk away, and you can't help but look at him with a frown on your face. "That was then, and this is now." "Why are you being like this? Babe." Heeseung pulls you toward him, and you huff in frustration as you try to weasel from his gasp. "You're acting like I'm some insecure housewife who needs you to coddle her. I'm not insecure, and even if I was, there's nothing you can do about it. Who cares? Why do you even care?" Heeseung gapes at you, before his hands circle your wrists so you can't move away from him. "Hello? Because I love you? Do I need another reason to want to understand why the woman I've been with for almost a decade is suddenly acting like she hates me?"Â
"Me? Hate you? Be fucking serious." You scoff, and Heeseung's eyes narrow. "Then tell me what the hell is going on in your mind, because I'm not a mind reader. I cannot fix a problem if you don't tell me what it is." "Oh, but if I were Soyoungâ" You start, but stop the moment his eyes meet yours. They're full of hurt and a hint of anger, a singular tear spilling from them before he drops your wrists with a click of his tongue. "Don't."
His voice is soft, and he pinches the bridge of his nose as he turns away from you, before shrugging his suit jacket off. He sighs shakily, and you feel your throat burn as you step out of your heels, placing them quietly on the shoe rack by the door. You purse your lips, taking a deep breath before turning on your heel, moving towards your bedroom before the tears spill from your eyes.
You didn't know what to do to stop the feeling of despair from clawing at you. And you felt stupid, thinking that you needed to even allow that feeling into your chest. You and Heeseung had spoken in depth on Sunday about your relationship â when you weren't pinned under him or vice versa. You talked about having kids, you talked about your parents, you talked about each other. He admitted to you that Dr. Bahng had told him to take some time off for the two of you before the year ended, and that he'd talk to his Captain about submitting the paperwork for a vacation sometime this week.
He admitted that he wholly believes marrying you was one of the best decisions he's ever made, and profusely apologized for his inability to cherish you the way you deserved. He held you closely as his promises to do better rained over you, and you promised the same.
He admitted to feeling his heart racing in his chest the day he met you, but was too consumed with guilt about Chaeyoung to ever bring it up, and his crush on you started developing soon after. He admitted that you made him overthink every step he took, every word he said â so much so that he figured it was just better to push you away than tell you about his feelings. The two of you recounted how Sunghoon made the two of you meet him at the campus cafe with the premise that he needed help on an assignment â only to ditch you with a frown, and figure your shit out falling from his lips as he left with Jake.
You brought up how he'd gaped at Sunghoon, and the way you awkwardly picked at your nails before confessing that you had a little crush on him. The way you rambled about knowing that his circumstances were really shitty, that you completely understood if he didn't feel the same, and that you were sorry Sunghoon put the two of you in this situation. Heeseung had only smiled as he nodded along to your words, before abruptly interrupting you to ask if you were free that following Friday. You had been, and he picked you up at seven for a date â an arcade, where the two of you jokingly did a Love Test-O-Meter and got the highest level. The two of you had scrunched your noses, but you both had deep blushes across your cheeks as the other patrons woo'd you. After, you went back to his dorm and ordered takeout, before promptly getting intoxicated on a bottle of gin stolen from Jay and watched horror films for hours before you passed out on his bed holding hands.
The rest? History.
You're struggling to pull your dress zipper down when Heeseung enters the room, his fingers gently tugging the zipper down your back without a word. You hear the gentle jazz music playing in your living room as he shuffles towards the closet, unbuttoning his shirt before hanging it back up. His hand reaches for one of the towels on the shelves, before taking another out and placing it on the bed.
A silent invitation to join him in the shower, if you so felt like it.
You hesitated, watching the way he gathered his pajamas and tucks them under his arm, the urge to follow after him far too strong as you stepped out of your dress, letting it pool on the floor. You kicked it away with a huff, before stripping entirely and grabbing the towel and your robe off the back of your bedroom door. You linger at the bathroom door, hearing the water start to pour and the sound of the shower curtain being pulled open. You walk in silently, setting your things down on the counter as Heeseung undid his belt, hanging it up on the hook by the door. You make a mental note to take it out when you leave, he'll forget it and not wear it for weeks until he sees it again. He tilts his head towards the shower as he peels off his undershirt, signaling for you to get in while he gets undressed.
The water is hot against your skin, and you close your eyes with an inward sigh. He steps in moments after, before tilting your head back just slightly so the water can cascade through your hair. Your hands instinctively move to touch him, but you retract back to your sides. He gently takes them, wrapping them around his waist like you usually do.
He doesn't say anything as he washes your hair gently, your eyes closed so as to not take in the image of your husband's slightly swollen eyes. His fingers card through your hair smoothly, before you feel his lips on your forehead.Â
"I love you. Don't say it back. Don't say anything." You don't, but you're sure he sees the tear that slips from your eye as you nod silently. It comes so easily to him now. So, so easily to let you know how he feels about you. It makes you weak in the knees.
The rest of your shower is like that, his lips brushing chaste kisses all over your face as he repeats himself over and over, I love you, I love you, I love you. Your tears are hot as they continue to spill, and you finally slip out of the shower when he asks you to take the extra pillows off the bed â his final kiss to your lips after carefully washing your face for you.
You do as he asks, taking your decorative pillows and piling them in the closet like you usually do. You silently get dressed for bed, not bothering with your skincare â you'll just cry it off. Your hair is still damp when you lie down in one of your husband's old shirts and a pair of Spiderman briefs you stole from him years ago. He quietly turns all the lights off but leaves the music playing in the living room, before walking into the bedroom as he pulls his shirt over his head.
Your vision is blurry as you look up at him, his face illuminated by the evening moonlight. He sighs as he sits on your side of the bed, his hand sliding under the duvet to rest on your thigh. "Come dance with me." You blink a few times, staring at him before closing your eyes, shoving the duvet to the side and swinging your legs over the side of the bed. He stands, taking your hand in his and making you follow him to the living room.
You hear the opening notes of Unchained Melody by The Righteous Brothers â yet another song from your wedding â as Heeseung pulls you into him, planting a soft kiss to your hairline as his hands find home on your lower back. You exhale into his chest, feeling his heartbeat quicken as you slide your hands under his shirt, resting them high on his back.Â
"I love you, I'm sorry." You mumble as he sways the two of you gently, and he hums in response.
"I need you to know that I've never had feelings for Chaeyoung." He says clearly, and you close your eyes. "I've never had feelings for her, in any way that wasn't platonic. There are plenty of reasons she and I never got together after she kissed me when we were teenagers. Not that they matter, because all that matters is that I didn't feel the same, I never have and I never will." You don't respond, feeling your eyes sting with tears.
"It's only ever been you for me. I've never once thought back to when we started dating and thought that I'd wouldâve been better off with anyone else. I've never wanted anyone that isn't you, and I think that is equally as beautiful as it is terrifying. In lieu of you, who? I'd have no first love without you, youâre the only love I want." "I'm sorry." You whisper as your tears soak into his shirt, and he pinches your hip lightly.Â
"I'd genuinely be nothing without you. You are the most patient, loving person I've ever met. No one makes me want to be a better man like you do. I feel sick every time I have to get out of bed and go to work, but I remind myself that you only deserve the best. This house, our things, what I hope I can provide for our future kidsâŠit can only be the best. So, I'm sorry, baby. I'm sorry for giving so much importance to the future, which isn't a bad thing in itself. But, I've ignored my present. You're a gift from life, I've ignored you and it pains me to know I've caused you so much distress. So much so that you resort to feeling like this, like I'd ever leave the love of my life, the love for my life, for someone else."
His hands find your face, cooing at the pout on your lips as he gently wipes your tears. "I meant everything I said this weekend, too. I could never ask for a better woman, not when I have you." You only let out a sob in response, your husband cuddling you into his chest as he turns the music off when the song changes. He rubs your back as he moves the two of you back to the bedroom. He only separates from you to slide under the covers, but pulls you flush to his chest and envelopes you tightly in his arms.
"I love you so, so endlessly. Please don't ever doubt that again." He sighs shakily, pressing his lips to your temple as you bury your face in his neck. "I love you, Hee."
Friday, 3:40pm.
It'd been three weeks since you told Heeseung about Chaeyoung's return, and she'd become a regular patient at your clinic. She told you more about her husband, her friends, and how she missed Heeseung. She asked you about your life, and you did everything to avoid mentioning names, even going as far as avoiding certain questions. You kept Heeseung updated with everything, and the more you told himâŠ
âŠThe more disinterested he became. It was odd to you, but you said nothing as he changed the subject, as he rolled his eyes, as he kissed you in the middle of your sentences.Â
Heeseung also made it a point to drop you off and pick you up from work every day, insisting he enjoyed it. He made your breakfast and picked your clothes, and it was like every morning was a challenge to see if he could convince you to take a trip to the bedroom in your work clothes. He'd succeeded twice, and you were late to work both times. He hadn't been successful since, earning soft swats of your hand and gentle shoves.
However, this morning â you did it all on your own. Heeseung had recently taken on a new case and it was cutting into his sleep. He came home not even an hour before you woke up, several apologetic calls and texts throughout the night before you fell asleep at midnight without him.
You tucked him in, planting kisses across his face as you shrugged your coat on. He didn't stir, and you packed his breakfast and lunch and left it on the table. You took the long way, playing the same soft jazz station he did every morning.
One of your patients had called to reschedule, so you'd have an early afternoon home. You got a text from Heeseung moments after arriving at the clinic, complaining about why you didn't wake him up to take you â only for him to call you at noon and say he'd barely gotten up for work. You'd laughed and teased him about thinking he'd be able to take you to work when he clearly needed the rest, only to hear Sunghoon tell your lovebird of a husband to get off the phone and focus.
It'd been nearly four hours since then, and you were about to wrap up with Chaeyoung.
"I found him on social media, you know. His mom posted a congratulatory post, he works in the same town. He's a lieutenant at the Seventh Precinct." She picked at her nails, a frown on her lips as you try not to show your shock at her words. "Who, your best friend?" "Yes. He's married now, too. I couldn't find anything about her, though. His parents didn't post anything about the wedding but a backshot of him and the bride." She sighs, and you think back. You'd both asked his parents to keep it private, and they both chose that photo to post across their social media to boast to their friends. You'd appreciated it so deeply that you bought them a rice cooker for Christmas that year.
"Do you plan on going to see him at some point?" You ask smoothly, refilling her glass of water as she shrugs. "I planned on going today, actually. I'm justâŠnervous. I had a friend drop me off today, and I'd be going alone. I feel like I'd need a support system." "I can go with you, if you'd like. I'm headed that way anyway." The words tumbled out before you could stop them, and her eyes widened with surprise before she smiled. "You'd do that?" "Of course. This is a big step for you, you know? I'd just have to make some calls, I know that precinct happens to be rather finicky with visitors." You shrug, feeling the pit in your stomach grow deeper as you wonder how you're going to tell Heeseung. She nods excitedly, and you excuse yourself, walking down the hall so nothing can be heard through the door.
The line rings three times before Heeseung picks up.
"Hey, baby. What's up?" "You can't be mad at me. Promise you won't get mad." You rush out, and he laughs. "I won't be mad. At least, I don't think I'll be. Are you okay?" "She wants to meet you. She said she's going over there today, and my stupid ass offered to drive her over because I'm going home early, anyway." You're wincing as the line goes silent, before your husband sighs. "Oh, babygirl." You can picture him pinching the bridge of his nose, the particular pet name only really slipping when he's stressed. "I'm sorry, honey." "No, no. It's fine, just..let me get some stuff settled, I'll let Minseo know to let you through without issues." He trails off, before another sigh is heard. "Does she know we're married?" "She found that back shot from our wedding. She doesn't know it's me." You sigh shakily, and your husband only echoes it back. "Alright, I'll let the guys know. Will you be in the room? I don't think I can do this alone." "Yes, of course. I won't be there as your wife, though, if that'sâŠfine. Just think of it as that one time we roleplayed."
Your husband snorts, "Babe, that was the most awkward thing ever." "Because you can't hold character! But don't worry, we'll spin that one back someday." You hum affirmatively, earning a soft laugh. "I love you, baby. I'll see you in what, thirty?" "I'd run red lights for you if it wasn't illegal and dangerous." You shrug, despite him not being able to see you. He's probably rolling his eyes, a click of his tongue coming through the phone. "Be good, honey. I'll see you. Love you." "I will. Love you." You shoot a few texts off to the other detectives as the line hangs up, before sliding back into your office and seeing Chaeyoung sprawled across the couch with her arm over her eyes. "You alright in here?" Your soft chuckle startles her, and she straightens quickly, brushing her hair out of her face. "Sorry, I'm nervous." "Not to worry. They know me well, so don't be startled if anyone says anything." You smile as you grab your coat, before floating over to your computer and clicking around. "Ready to go? We can even stop and get a little drink for the drive." "You're such a girl, I love it." She giggles, and you feel your stomach sink as you shake your head with fake amusement. You feel awful lying to her â she'd been so open and honest, warming up to you incredibly fast. She eagerly bounces alongside you as you walk to your car after gathering your belongings and locking your office, slipping into your passenger seat as you quickly buckle yourself in.
The ride is full of nervous chatter from her and you drop your guard a bit, opting to talk to her about Heeseung through memories. You tell her about your first date, and she's amused, telling you about her first date with her husband â talking about how the two of them wound up getting lost in Busan because he'd forgotten his way around a smaller part of town. You only smiled throughout.
You arrived at the precinct with an iced coffee from a shop a block away, Chaeyoung holding an Americano as she nervously chewed her lip. You spoke to Minseo softly, your eyes pointed as she nodded â it seemed Heeseung had vetted everyone before your arrival. "Go ahead, Dr. Lee. Lieutenant Lee should be in his office, his schedule is clear for the afternoon." "Thank you, Minseo. Take a break soon, okay?" You give her a warm smile and this time, she returns it, before printing your visitor stickers and giving one to Chaeyoung. Her fingers tremble as she sticks it on her denim jacket, and you see Sunghoon staring intently in your direction before you give him a dirty look.
"Dr. Lee! Good to see you, it's been a while." He wanders over, draping his arm over your shoulders as you try not to groan in annoyance. "Detective Park, always a pleasure." "Sunghoon?" You hear Chaeyoung whisper, and he glances over at her with a mock look of surprise. "Yes? Do I know you?" She opens her mouth, but you quickly shake your head, reaching for her hand. "Later. I promise you'll have time."
"Sorry." She mumbles, but she looks over her shoulder at Sunghoon for a bit as you walk through the precinct. You note the way her eyes widen at the sight of Jake and Jay, their serious faces contorting to ones of confusion at her longing glances. They all pretend like their hearts aren't racing out of their chests as you knock on Heeseung's door, hearing an affirmative sound to come in.
"Lieutenant Lee." You poke your head in, squeezing Chaeyoung's hand in yours as your husband looks up. You fight the urge to say he looks handsome in his white button down and blue suit jacket, but he stands before you can say anything else.
"Dr. Lee, always a pleasure to see you. How can I help you?" He opens the door further, and you can almost hear the way he thanks his years of training for the stoicism on his face as he sees Chaeyoung. You pull her into the office as he steps out of the way, her eyes wide as you sit her down and quickly close the blinds, sticking your tongue out at Sunghoon for good measure.
You almost forget Heeseung has a few photos of you on his desk, and you look over your shoulder to see them all facing the wall behind his chair. You nearly sigh in relief, but clear your throat instead as you sit next to Chaeyoung. Heeseung smiles softly, checking his watch.
"How can I help you, ladies? Oh, I'm Lieutenant Lee Heeseung. At your service." He extends his hand, noting the way hers trembles as she takes it. He gives it a firm shake, before glancing at her again. "You lookâŠkind of familiar. Have we met before?" "I can't." She whispers, her hand gripping onto the sleeve of your coat as you nod, before clearing your throat. "It's okay. You want me to talk?" She nods without a word, and you give Heeseung a pleading look. "So, we have a bit of aâŠpredicament." "Right, as one would assume." He nods slowly, and you note the way he nervously chews his lip before taking a seat on the opposite side of the couch. "Are you in danger, or some sort of trouble?" He clicks a pen from his pocket, opening a drawer from the side table to take out a notepad.
"More like we have some answers to a case that went cold a few years back." You hear him hum, the pen not touching the paper as he looks up. "Alright, should I pull up some records?" "If you'd like, but it was a Missing Persons case you were involved with. Do you remember when we talked about it when we first met? The Cha Soyoung case?" "AhâŠright. Right." He clears his throat, and you can see the tears beginning to well in his eyes as he blinks them back. "That case has long been dry, with lots of dead ends. Everyone in the precinct is familiar with it. Last update was, what, three years ago? Some sightings a few miles away." "Lieutenant, this is Jeon Chaeyoung." You introduce her properly, her eyes peering at him over your shoulder. He blinks, nodding slowly. "Formerly known as Cha Soyoung." He tilts his head at your words, as if he didn't already know. He stares blatantly, and you make her scoot up a bit so he can get a better look at her face. His eyes scan her repeatedly, before he stands up and moves to his desk, opening a drawer and taking out one of the many missing posters you used to put up every week. He looks at it for a moment, and sighs shakily. "You know, I appreciate you coming byâ" "Hee, it's me." She blurts, a few tears rolling down her face as you see a pained look on your husband's face. He nibbles on his lip, his eyes full of stress as he looks at you. She stands up, and Heeseung tongues his cheek as he shakes his head. "Soyoung had a widow's peak, and a birthmark on her neck." "Heeseung, please. I know you're upset, and IâŠI'm sorry. I've missed you..." She trails off, and you note the way he's near tears, looking away from her, the paper crumpling in his hand as he clears his throat. "Dr. Lee, can I see you outside?"
Chaeyoung gives you a look of despair, and you just pat her shoulder with an apologetic look as you watch Heeseung storm out. "I'll talk to him, don't worry." She opens her mouth to speak, but she just sighs. Nodding, she takes a seat, and you tighten your coat around you as you follow your husband out. He's in the break room a few feet away, and he nearly shuts the door with a slam as you slip inside. His arm reaches for you, pulling him into you roughly and squeezing you so hard you can't breathe for a moment. "I can't do this. I'm not strong enough, Y/N." His voice is unsteady, but you snake your arms around his waist with a hum. "You know, I was worried. I was beginning to think you were going to let this all justâŠgo. You are strong enough, and you can do this.. I know this is scary, it's so overwhelming. I know you, though. You're Lee Heeseung, you don't give up on anything. It's been almost a decade and you've worked so hard to get here. Don't you want to see the fruit of your hard work?" Your voice is soft but stern, and your husband only whimpers pitifully into your shoulder. You coo, running your hand down the nape of his neck as you sway the two of you gently. "I love you, baby. I believe you can get through this. You deserve a happy ending to it all. So many years of stress won't be good for your hairline." He actually snorts at your joke, but the tears continue nonetheless as he moves away, pouting as he sits in one of the chairs. You wipe your hands on his cheeks gently, offering him a tissue from your pocket as you squat in front of him. "It's gonna be okay. I promise." "I don't want to make amends. I don't think I can forgive her for this." He sniffles, and you nod in understanding. "That's okay, too. You don't need to be her friend again, even if that's what she wants. You owe her nothing, and vice versa." "I love you." He whines, covering his face with his hands as you laugh softly. "I know, I love you too, Hee."
"No, seriously, I'd ask you to marry me again if we weren't already married." He grabs your hands quickly, and you nearly lose your balance as he jerks you forward, enveloping you in a crushing embrace. "Submit your vacation paperwork and we can renew our vows instead." "I love you so much!" He cries into your coat. You can't help but laugh out loud, a bit of shock running through you as you take in his very big emotional outburst. "I know, I know! Now please, get it together. We've got to get back, and you need to talk to her. The poor girl is vibrating out of her skin."
"Kiss me." He pouts, looking up at you as you stand. You roll your eyes. "After. Promise." "I need it for encouragement. Be the wind beneath my wings, babe." He begs, making you sigh. "One kiss, and keep your tongue in your mouth." "Two kisses to make up for the lack of tongue." He counters, and you smack his arm before pressing your lips to his. His hands instinctively hold your waist, your own moving to hold his cheeks gently. It's slow and sweet, and you pull away as his teeth nip at your lower lip.
âStop that." You brush two more chaste kisses on his lips, a pout appearing as you squeeze his hand. "Come on, we have to." "I love you." He repeats for the umpteenth time, and you know he's finding comfort in knowing that you both feel the same and are there for moral support. "I love you, Hee. Now, let's go." The other detectives pretend they don't notice the way you hold his hand tightly as you both exit the break room, Heeseung ducking his head to hide his teary eyes as you open the door to his office. You pop your head in, seeing a rather disheveled Chaeyoung on the couch.
"How're we feeling?" You call gently, squeezing Heeseung's hand behind you before you let go. She gives you a thumbs down as she wipes her eyes, and Heeseung clears his throat behind you as he carefully slips past. She shifts as he does so, and you shut the door behind you. He sits across from her carefully, her eyes shimmering with tears as she peers up at you.
Heeseung does the same, before glancing at your wedding rings. They're snug on your finger, and you carefully thumb at them as you gingerly take a seat on the couch next to Chaeyoung. You give him a pointed look, and he sighs, running his hand through his hair.
"I'm sorry, Hee." She whispers, and he nods. "I'm sure." "I really am. You would've talked me out of it, I know you."
Heeseung's hands flex on his knees, "You could've talked to me, at least. You could've said literally anything. You just up and left and expected no one would care." "You don't get it, Hee. I felt so much pressure from everyone around me, I was so tired of pretending like I wanted any of that for myself. I didn't want to take over the company, you knew that." She tries to reason, but you can tell he's fighting himself from saying anything out of line as he takes a deep breath.
"It's always what I knew and what you knew, but you clearly forgot the fact that you were my best friend. Since we were kids, and the most painful part of this all is confirming that you didn't trust me that entire time. There's no coming back from this."Â
She's silent as he picks at his nails, before she speaks softly. "Don't you at least want to know how I'm doing?" He scoffs quietly, folding his hands in his lap. "Sure. Tell me everything you've built for yourself while I've spent a decade agonizing about whether or not you're alive." His tone is harsh and you find yourself giving him a hard look, your jaw tight as she looks down. He doesn't apologize, and you find yourself speaking softly.
"A lot of big feelings here, hm? There's a lot of pain to get through, soâŠlet's not take anything to heart right now." You nod, and Chaeyoung nods next to you as she clears her throat. Heeseung doesn't acknowledge it, opting to bounce his leg.
"I got married. I know you did too, right? During college?" She nods, and he clicks his tongue.Â
"Heeseung, be nice." You say his name out of habit, his eyes snapping to you as you wince at your mistake. "Didn't know we were on a first-name basis, Dr. Lee." "You know what I mean." You roll your eyes, and Heeseung sighs. "Yeah, I got married in college right after I turned twenty-one. Seven years ago."
"You're awfully young to be a Lieutenant." She says softly, and he struggles not to roll his eyes. "Doesn't take much to get promoted when you're constantly mulling over cases and neglecting other things for someone who didn't want to be found. You could've called, you know."
"Could I have? Because it seems like you hate me for doing what's best for me." Her eyes are narrowed now, and he scoffs. "I think I'm allowed to hate you for all its fucking worth at this point. You abandoned me nine years ago, you just up and left without a word! Do you know how many birthdays I had to spend answering questions about you instead of celebrating with my loved ones? You know how many date nights I shoved aside with my wife because I was here, hoping I'd get a crumb of knowing that you're at least alive? Do you understand how much of my life has gone into this?!" Heeseung is starting to lose his patience, but it seems Chaeyoung had been ready to blow her top for years.
"What about me, Heeseung?! You think I liked always being on the fucking sidelines, waiting for you to notice me? I had to fucking disappear for you to care about me? For you to look my way even once, I had to uproot my entire life? Is that what it had to fucking come to?!"Â
Your lips part at her words, Heeseung's eyes widening before they narrow. "Are you serious? That's what you want to attribute this to? I didn't reciprocate your feelings so now I'm the bad guy? You fucking left, instead of communicating with anyone. You made that decision, no one forced you to take that road." "I did what I had to, and the fact that you never wanted to be with me despite us literally being the perfect love story was just the cherry on top. It was my catalyst and I hope you know that I resent you for making me feel so undesirable." She huffs, and you clear your throat as Heeseung glowers.Â
"I thinkâŠwe've lost our way a bit. This was more about reconnecting, I assumed it'd be a bit more peaceful. The blame game gets us nowhere." You sigh, running a hand through your hair. Chaeyoung takes a deep breath, struggling not to roll her eyes before pulling her phone out. "This is my husband. You'd like him, he plays bass and he produces music for an entertainment company. His name is Jungkook, we got married two years ago." Heeseung gives you a glance, your eyes nervous as you breathe out.
"Everything alright?" He asks gently, and you know it's his way of asking if he can talk about you. Your eyes are nervous, but you nod anyway, playing with the hem of your dress. Chaeyoung gives you a once over, patting your knee with a smile.Â
"I'm sorry, I know this must be stressful. I should've never taken your offer, Dr. Lee." "No, I think this was necessary, really. For the three of us." You shrug, attempting to appear nonchalant. Her smile doesn't reach her eyes as Heeseung clears his throat, standing up to grab the photo of you off his desk. It's you on your honeymoon â the two of you took it the summer after you graduated from college. You were wearing a white dress and it was one of the most picturesque candids in your collection. He gives you a waywards glance, but you only nod as he sits down.
"This is my wife. You'd like her, she plays piano and crochets and does cross-stitch. She's a therapist. Her name is Y/N, we got married seven years ago." He flips the picture, and you watch her eyes widen out of your peripheral vision. She takes it gently, her manicured thumb stroking your smiling face. She looks pale as she turns to you, her jaw tight.
"Chaeyoung, I'm sorry." You whisper, and she gives you a glare. "Are you? You knew this entire time and you let me open up to you about everything? Did you tell him, too? Did you tell everyone here?" Her voice only raises as she scoots away from you, and you feel your cheeks heat as you run a hand through your hair. "We spent years looking for you, Chaeyoung. There were so many sleepless nights, so many tears, so much stress over you. This is hard for me too, you know." "What, loving a man who is nothing but a shell of a person? Yeah, I'm sure you loved filling his fucking cup until it overflowed while he casted you aside." She sneers, and you feel your chest tighten. "I'm sure it felt great being stuck in your house, wondering when the fuck he'd be home because he was here. Looking at case files, talking to forensics, doing anything instead of being home with you." Your throat burns as you clear it, but Heeseung interrupts as he takes the photo of you back. "Chaeyoung, you're obviously angry. I can't blame you for that, but I also won't allow you to speak to Y/N like this. She's here to help both of us." "Yeah, well you can take your help and fucking shove it, Y/N." She huffs, gathering her coat from the couch cushion. You stand quickly, holding your hands out to deter her from leaving. "Chaeyoung, please let me explainâ" "Explain what? How you're a lying bitch?" She spits, and Heeseung's eyes narrow as he opens his mouth to say something, only for you to wave him off. Your gaze is unreadable as she continues to berate you. "You want to explain why you let me agonize over Heeseung for three weeks, and how you listened to me tell you how I felt about him and said nothing? What kind of fucking therapist are you?" "A dumb one." You say softly, "I didn't tell you I was married to Heeseung because that's none of your business. Getting you involved in my personal life could be incredibly damaging to my career, but I did it because I've known about you since before I met Heeseung." Her eyes are aflame as she stares you down, but you don't budge.
"I don't fight over men. I never have, I never will. What I will do, though, is tell you that though I knew mixing my personal life and my career could be a disaster, I did it because I love Heeseung. You suffered, you left because of all the pressure you felt. I understand that pressure, too. I know what it's like for your family to expect something from you that you simply don't want to provide, or feel like you can't."
Her eyes well with tears as she looks away.
"Just as you suffered, though, we did, too." You gesture at the space between you and Heeseung, and he steps slightly closer. "I cannot tell you the nights we spent walking all over town and putting posters anywhere they'd allow us to. I cannot even begin to explain the stress everyone felt, all of your friends, all of your family members because you just disappeared. I wasn't your friend, and I didn't know you personallyâŠbut it affected me, too." A tear falls down her face, and you reach to wipe it with the sleeve of your coat.
"There were so many nights that I'd be in Heeseung's dorm just talking about you. He'd tell me so many stories, he's shown me so many photos of you together. He's told me every piece of your life that he knows, and you've sat in my office for three weeks and done the same for him. Things I already knew, and things I didn't." She silently sits back down, letting the tears drip down her face.
"I know it's painful, to want something or someone so bad and have it be just out of your reach. I know it sounds like I'm bragging, or maybe like I'm trying to rub it in your face but I promise I'm not. Loving Heeseung has not been easy, there were many times I wanted to give up. There were nights he'd be locked in the home office, overthinking himself into a bottle of bourbon." You laugh softly, taking Heeseung's seat across from her. He stands behind you, his hand running up and down your back.
"There were times I wanted to scream at him, I wanted to hurt his feelings because he made me feel neglected. He'd come home late, he'd miss dinner, he wouldn't be around to just hang out. You told me during our first session that you and Jungkook dance together all the time, that he sings you to sleep. I cannot tell you how envious I would have been, had I met you just a week earlier."Â
Her gaze meets yours, surprised. "What?"
"I mean what I say and I say what I mean." Heeseung speaks up, his voice a lot softer. "I was not a good husband. I'm still not, but it's not your fault. It's my fault, I wanted so badly to know that you were at least okay that I completely neglected Y/N. I wasn't present, emotionally or physically." "I knew it wouldn't be easy, loving someone like Heeseung." You interrupt him, "I knew loving someone who had gone through something so gut wrenching would be one of the most difficult things I'd ever have to do. I wanted it so bad, Chaeyoung. I wanted to love him, and be the glue that held him together. I wanted to be the person he woke up with in the mornings and the person he kissed goodnight. I wanted to be there, no matter what it took." "So you allowed all of it." She murmurs, and you sigh.Â
"I fought it. I didn't want to brave the storm that was Lee Heeseung in college. But like a moth to a flame, I stayed. I got hurt time and time again, but the good outweighed the bad so much. I saw so much potential, I saw so much kindness and I knew in my heart I could help it flourish. And now, we're here." "Don't you feel jealous?" She asks, making you smile sadly before nodding. "Of course I felt jealous. I knew there was a girl that knew my husband more than I ever would, and I envied that. I wanted to know everything there was to know, but I had to come to terms with the fact that it simply couldn't be. We're ever-evolving, and while you may have known each other for so many yearsâŠyou've both changed so much." She closes her eyes, her chipped nails digging into the fabric of her peacoat. Heeseung's hand rubs circles into your back, before you feel him squeeze your shoulder. "I don't hate you." She says suddenly, her eyes on Heeseung. He clicks his tongue, "I don't expect you to. I haven't done anything to you to make myself worthy of hating."
"Why not me?" She mumbles, and Heeseung's eyes close as he pinches the bridge of his nose in frustration. "Just tell me that." "I can't do that to you, Chaeyoung." He shakes his head, and you hear her scoff. "Just do it, it'll make getting over you a lot easier. I already know you're married, I'm not going to make a fucking move." "I wouldn't allow it, either." He says through gritted teeth, making you shift in your chair, clearing your throat. "Would you like for me to step out?" "No." They say in unison, and Heeseung holds onto your shoulders as he looks at Chaeyoung. "Don't you think your family wants to know you're okay? It's been nine years." "What, do you keep up with them? Do they care about anything else besides that stupid company now?" She rolls her eyes, her jaw tight as she stares at her boots. "Your father sold it." Heeseung speaks softly, "He sold it not even a week after you left. Your sister bought it from him and funded half of the search party that looked for you for a year." Her eyes stay narrowed as her lips purse. "Doesn't mean they care. It was always the company this, the company that. Just like you, Hee." She glares up at him, "Focus on school, Soya. Let's study, Soya. We got into college and you just stopped wanting to hang out like we used to." "I'm 'just like them' because I prioritized my studies? Because I was on scholarship while mommy and daddy paid your way? My fucking bad, Soya." He scoffs, making her scowl. "See? You're just like them." "You're ungrateful! You've always been so blind at how things were just handed to you, you were always so fucking out of touch with everything! Your father had an entire company, a collection of businesses that he sold because you just wanted to up and leave! I don't think you will ever understand how privileged your life has been, even in the years you've been gone." His laugh is humorless as he shakes his head, and you clear your throat.Â
"I think maybe this has been enough for one day." "You don't get to decide that, Y/N. I still want an answer. Why. Not. Me." She's standing now, her face tear-stained but her eyesâŠthey're full of fury. Towards who, you're not entirely sure anymore.
You look up at Heeseung, his jaw clenched as he runs a hand through his hair. "You just don't have what I need. I won't be with someone who can't make me feel fulfilled in all aspects of life, or someone who doesn't share the same goals as me. You don't see the world the way I do, and you never have." "And she does?" She gestures at you, her voice thick as her eyes gloss over once more. "Yes. She does. She is everything I could ever ask for and so much more than I will ever deserve." He folds his hands in front of him, "There is always going to be something in this life you cannot have, whether it be an object, a person, even a stick of gum. You can't hold onto that resentment forever, it will make you miserable. You shouldn't live your life that way, not when you have a husband who loves you and a life people would kill for. Not when someone you said was your best friend over and over has someone who loves him." She glares at him, her chest rising with shallow breaths. She shakes her coat off, pulling it over her arms and walking towards the door. Her hand wraps around the doorknob as she looks at the two of you, the tick in her jaw growing tighter as she sees you stand.
"You don't have to act like this, Chaeyoung. You don't have to keep running away, you'll never solve anything this way." "You're married to the man I've been in love with since I was six years old. You lied to me, knowing I was in pain about this entire situation, and you stand here and try to act innocent. You're just as guilty as I am, so you don't get to tell me how I get to act, Y/N." She whispers, a singular tear rolling down her face as she turns to Heeseung.Â
"You can tell my parents, and whoever else you please. Y/N can give them my information. I won't be coming back to Seoul, and I won't be visiting your practice again. Do not contact me further, and I won't make a scene."
She throws the door open, revealing the gaggle of detectives bunched around the door. Sunghoon nearly falls into the office as they disperse like bugs, catching himself on the doorframe. Chaeyoung stares up at him, his own eyes flickering to you. "You okay in here?"
"Fine." Heeseung replies curtly, and Chaeyoung scoffs, pushing past Sunghoon with a scowl on her face. She stalks through the precinct, and Minseo stares wide eyed as she shoves Jay and Jake out of the way to the double doors. Your eyes never leave her, continuing to stare after her as the doors shut.
You hear a disappointed sigh from your husband, and you peer up at him as Sunghoon shuts the door with his lips pressed into a thin line. He looks a mess, and you move to comfort him as Jay opens the door. He strides in confidently, a quirk in his brow as he pulls his hand out of his pocket, a new pack of cigarettes in his hand.
"Shall we?" It doesn't take much convincing to get you and Heeseung out the backway of the precinct, and you find yourself resting your forehead against the rough brick of the building. Jay lights your cigarette, sliding it between your fingers as Heeseung lights his own. You mumble a thanks, before holding it between your lips.
"Long day, huh?" He starts, his words muffled as he holds his own between his lips, the flicker of the lighter catching your attention. You nod, pushing off the brick wall to face the two men. Jay gives you a once over, "New dress?" "Storage." You shake your head, blowing smoke from your lips as Heeseung paces back and forth. "How's your girlfriend?" "Not my girlfriend, just a fling. Cut her off a bit ago. Feeling good, though." He nods, and Heeseung walks by you, your hand reaching for him. He takes it, leaning against the wall as he pulls you to him. He spins you around, making you face Jay as he wraps his arm in front of you. "PDA? From Lee Heeseung?" Jay acts shocked as you snort, closing your eyes as you lean your head back onto his shoulder. "You'd be surprised what Lee Heeseung has been up to these days." "Mmh, do tell." He shrugs, flicking the ash off his cigarette. "Did you know sharing details of your sex life to your friends is considered inappropriate social behavior?" You smirk, and he raises his brow.
"Oh, don't tell me the people who have been married for seven years are fucking. Oh man, holy shit." Jay sarcastically rolls his eyes, holding his hand to his chest as if he were clutching pearls. "Like animals." Heeseung speaks for the first time since you stepped outside, making your eyes widen as Jay's do the same. You glance up at him, watching the way he throws the cigarette butt onto the floor and stomps it out with his foot. He plucks yours from your fingers, slotting it between his lips for a slow drag before giving it back. His lips have a layer of glitter on them from your lipgloss.
"Hee, you cannot say that." "Who cares? It's Jay. It's not like he's going to ask to watch us fuck." He shrugs, making your cheeks grow hot as you turn to Jay to apologize, who is looking away with red ears. Heeseung looks over, blowing smoke out of his lips as he speaks. "Dude." "You fucking brought it up, dickwad." Jay scoffs, before stomping out his own cigarette butt. You don't speak, opting to run a hand through your hair as Heeseung sighs.
"Did you guys hear anything through the door?" "Every word. Walls are thin, you know." Jay nods, offering another cigarette. Heeseung takes it, sighing as Jay hands him the lighter. "I cannot believe she's been in love with you since you were kids." "She's not in love with me, she's infatuated with the idea of me." He rolls his eyes, fiddling with the lighter. "Her parents used to fight in front of us all the time, and when we were seventeen she told me that she wanted something better than that. Admirable, truly, but she was never going to find that with me." He holds the blue flame to the cigarette, before handing it back to Jay. "Wasn't she your first kiss?" "Ugh, yeah. I only said yes because she kept talking about how Mina, you remember her sister Mina? Mina had her first kiss at sixteen." He rolls his eyes again, his arm around you tightening slightly as he leans his head back onto the building. "I think a part of me hates her." "That's valid." You and Jay say in unison, before Jay tilts his head for you to continue. You shake yours, shrugging as Heeseung continues to talk. "She always pushed for us to become more and I just didn't want that. She lacks so much compassion, and that's why her father wanted her to take over the company. She's cold and calculated and that's why I befriended her in the first place, because no one wanted to be her friend. She was mean to everyone, but I guess she learned how to fake it well." You'd never heard Heeseung speak of her this way, but he clicks his tongue before you can ask anything. "I don't want to keep talking about her. I still have to call her parents, fuck." He runs his hand over his face. The three of you sigh in unison, a snort from Jay as he notices it, "WellâŠI can say that I'm glad to know she's alive, even if we don't let her back into our lives."
"Yeah." Heeseung nods, taking a final drag from the cigarette in his mouth before dropping it and putting it out. "I guess that's the silver lining in this all. Nine yearsâŠman." You nod silently, before patting his arm. "We can call on Monday when I get home from work. I have to get all her information, anyway, and remove her from my patient registry so her insurance stops getting processed." "Shit, I forgot about that." Heeseung groans, slumping slightly as Jay laughs. "You guys head on home, we can get paperwork processed to actually close the case. We'll see you on Tuesday, Lieu." "Tuesday?" He echoes absently, and Jay scoffs. "Fine, Wednesday. Is that too much time away for you, workaholic?"
Your laugh makes Heeseung look up, watching you as you put out your cigarette. The two of you only indulged every once in a while, and Heeseung never fully took the habit up after you refused to kiss him one night after a smoke. Jay bids the two of you goodnight as you all walk back into the building, his box of cigarettes now broken in and Heeseung beelining for his office to grab his coat. "Hungry?" You ask as he shrugs it on, and he shakes his head. "Wanna go home and shower, go to bed. Wanna cuddle?"
He never asks. You canât bring yourself to say no, not that youâd want to anyway.
It's easy with you. You end up leaving your car in the precinct parking lot, dropping the keys on Jake's desk with the promise of dinner if he dropped it off at your house before morning. He rolled his eyes but agreed. The entire precinct watched as you left, Heeseung's arm holding you close â a sight they'd never seen.
"Can I be the little spoon tonight?" He asks as he buckles you in, and you press a kiss to his temple. "Yeah, Hee."
Monday, 6:32pm
The two of you spent the weekend processing everything that happened. You reluctantly left your husband's side for work this morning, driving yourself as he slept soundly. Your day felt incredibly slow, your hands aching to feel his warm skin under yours.
You'd felt the need to coddle him all weekend â you made his favorite meals, you massaged his back, you even made him a new pair of slacks. A navy blue this time, his smile shy as he modeled them for you on Sunday night. The two of you cuddled for hours, Heeseung burrowing his face in any crevice you'd allow. He kissed your skin all over, mumbles of I love you and hold me tighter falling from his lips as you spent the passing hours in your bed.
Your last patient of the day was a young girl in her twenties, her eyes constantly glossed over with tears as she tried to get comfortable with you. She wound up sobbing, your chest aching as you tried to comfort her. By the time she left, she looked much better â and she told you, thank you for your help. You have no idea how long I've been holding that in. It was enough to make your chest swell with pride as you drove home, a smile on your lips as you picked up dinner and played soft jazz on the radio. You felt the weight of the world slip onto your shoulders as you pulled into your driveway, killing the engine as you fished your house key out of your bag.
You'd contacted Chaeyoung's insurance the moment you got to the clinic, and pulled her from your patient registry without a second thought. You shoved her file into your bag and pushed the thought of it all out of your mind, choosing to focus all your energy on your patients and the way your shoes hurt your feet.
"Baby?" You called into the house as you opened the door, kicking your heels off with a sigh of relief. The cold tile of the foyer against your hot skin felt like Heaven, a shiver running down your spine as you set the bag of takeout down on the dinner table. You stop to listen, but hear nothing. "Baby, are you home?" You walk down the hall, reaching to take your earrings out as you cross the threshold to the bedroom. You see your husband laying on his back with his headphones on, the light off and curtains drawn. He wouldn't be able to see you if his eyes were open, but you can see him thanks to the light in the hallway behind you. His arms are crossed over his face, but you hear the familiar quiet sob fall from his lips. You feel your chest ache at the sight, but you don't interrupt him. You merely move your hands from your ears, leaving the earrings he gifted you a few years ago on as you fold your hands behind your back.
You watch him cry for a few minutes, before he groans in disgust. He wipes at his face angrily, sitting up abruptly with his eyes wide. He jumps as he sees you, his hand flying to his chest as you smile. "Hi." "Holy shit, babe. Don't do that." He takes his headphones off, carding his fingers through his hair as you shrug. "Maybe don't lay on our bed in the dark when I call for you twice." He rolls his eyes as you near the bed, your palms cool against his skin. "Anything you want to talk about?" Your thumbs wipe his cheeks as he shakes his head.
"Same old, just angry at the entire ordeal." He mumbles, his hands finding your hips. You hum, pressing a kiss to his hairline. "Well, I brought dinner. Come eat with me." "What did you get?" His voice is muffled as he buries his face in your stomach, the buttons of your vest annoying him as he huffs. You card your fingers through his hair, dragging your nails along his scalp, "I stopped at Pasta La Vista." "What happened to no more cheesy pun restaurants?" He snorts, and you pinch his cheek. "Ah, but I love going to those places with you. I love you, you know."Â
He sighs, reaching up to turn the light on. His fingers tug gently on the pull cord, the soft yellow light illuminating the room suddenly. You both wince as your eyes adjust, blinking rapidly before looking at each other. His mouth drops, making your head tilt. "Something wrong?" "Babe. Are you serious?"
His voice is whiny, paired with the splotchy cheeks and swollen lips from his crying. You furrow your brow in confusion, feeling his hands tighten on your hips. "What? Did I do something wrong?" "Be so fucking serious with me right now. Look at what you're wearing." He huffs, pulling at one of your belt loops. You glance down at your outfit, a form-fitting black pinstripe suit you hadn't worn in a few years. It had a matching vest, one you paired with a white button down underneath. You'd worn your white Hot Chicks, much to the dismay of your poor feet. "Do I look bad?" You ask softly, glancing at yourself in the mirror when he gets your attention by pulling at your belt buckle. "Are you kidding me? You look fucking amazing! You haven't worn this in ages, where the hell did you find it?" "You could've started with that! You had me thinking I did something wrong!" You huff, swatting at his shoulder as his fingers fiddle with the buttons of your vest. "I'm sorry, but you really caught me off guard. Fuck, have these always fit like this?" He runs his hands down the back of your thighs, and you feel your cheeks heat slightly as you shove his hands off you.
"Stop feeling me up and come eat dinner. We have things to do before we can turn in for the night." You remind him as you turn around to walk out of the bedroom when you feel his fingers pinch the swell of your ass. You reach behind you and smack his hand away, "Stop it!" "Fine, fine. Let meâŠget cleaned up I guess. I feel gross." He groans, rolling his eyes as he slides off the bed. You make your way to the kitchen without any more of Heeseung's touching, and you carefully plate everything up. You know he'd be content just eating on the couch with a show on, but you need something to busy yourself as your mind whirls with the idea of calling Chaeyoung's parents.
What would you even say? "Nice to meet you, now let me tell you all about how I betrayed your daughter when she came to me for therapy!" You groan, running your hands through your hair as you overwhelm yourself with thoughts. You thought you'd be fine, but you sort of thank your stars that you managed to make it through work without thinking about it. You'd rather be home and agonizing over it than anywhere else.
In all your thinking, you don't hear Heeseung walk into the kitchen. Your head is low between your shoulders as you hold onto the sink, taking deep breaths. You jolt when you feel his hand on your back, a concerned look in his eyes. "Are you okay?" "Yeah, fine. Sorry, justâŠthinking." You sigh, before pushing off the sink. He gives you a stern look, his hands moving to your waist to pull you into him. âTalk to me.â
You gently bang your forehead against his chest, âWhat are we even going to tell them?â
A low whistle comes from your husbandâs lips, âI have no idea. Promise to still think Iâm sexy if I break down?â
You snort, slapping his chest lightly as he smiles down at you. âEmotional vulnerability is sexy, Hee.â
âYou want me so bad.â He chides, making you roll your eyes. You try not to let your eyes linger on the muscle of his arms, now showcased by a sleeveless white shirt he must've changed into. âLetâs eat dinner and Iâll take care of whatever hornball issue you have later.â
âWill you keep the suit on?â He asks, brow raised as he scans your face. You rub your temples, before feigning an annoyed sigh. âYes, Heeseung, Iâll keep the suit on.â
âHave I ever told you how much I love you?â He smiles as you try to weasel your way out of his arms, but he holds you tightly. He pins you against the sink, his hand moving to hold your face gently. The tip of his nose touches yours slightly, the same electricity that skin-to-skin contact with your husband causes runs down your spine. âHave I?â
âYouâre going to wax poetic after I said Iâd keep the suit on to get you off?â You snort, and he rolls his eyes. âIâm going to wax poetic after my wife agrees to some weird shit I ask of her simply because she loves me as I love her.â
You struggle not to roll your eyes, but your warming cheeks give you away. "Please focus on the order of events, will you? Dinner, dreaded call, then whatever freak shit you have in your head. Move it." He grins as he presses a kiss to your forehead, before letting you worm out of his grasp. Dinner is quiet, with neither of you wanting to talk too much in detail about your days. Heeseung would know you were so stressed that you skipped lunch, and you'd know that he'd had to change his pillowcase twice because of how long he'd been crying. It wasn't something either of you wanted to share, but simultaneously, you both knew. "Do you think they'll be happy?" You murmur around a breadstick, a pout on your husband's lips as he chews. "I meanâŠI would hope so. Mrs. Cha lost her mind when she disappeared." "Define lost her mind."Â
He sighs, taking a sip of his water. "I guess the same way I did, but worse. The first year had to have been the worst. No sleep, she barely ate and was having constant breakdownsâŠbut it's different. A mother's love is nothing compared to what I may have felt then." He shrugs, and you find yourself humming in response.
Your eyes are downcast, pushing the remaining pasta around on your plate as he gazes at you. "I'm sorry to have put you through that." "Do you remember our vows? I'd promised I'd be there, always." You say pointedly, and he shakes his head. "I mean, through what happened on Friday. I will never stop apologizing for any of it, I know that in my heart. That day was just too much for you, I saw it in the way you looked at her. She hurt your feelings." "Calling me a bitch is hardly hurting my feelings, I've heard far worse." You snort, but Heeseung leans slightly across the table. "You know that's not what I'm talking about, honey. You're great at your job, you have to know that."
You sigh, "I know, I even had a patient today tell me I helped her a lot and it made me feel really nice. But, I will admit it was a dumb move to keep Chaeyoung as a patient. I should have told her from the get-go who I was and what I knew, and then maybe Friday would've gone differently. If at all, you know." "It's too late to think about what we should have done. We can only look forward, and unfortunately that means we have to make that call to her parents." He slumps in his chair, closing his eyes. "What if I cry?" "Then you cry, honey." You shrug, "I'll be here anyway. We're doing this together." Nothing more is said as the two of you clean up, opting to brush your teeth to remove the taste of the garlic from your tongues. You find yourself reapplying your lipstick, wiping the corners of your lips as you cap the wine red wax. Heeseung sits on the couch with his phone in his hand as you retrieve the file from your purse. He sighs as you walk over, your thigh brushing his as you sit next to him. "Ready?" You ask softly, your fingers flicking the file open. Heeseung sighs inwardly as he dials the number he's known by heart since he was a kid. You drape your leg over his to feel him closer, his hand sliding around your upper thigh as the line rings.
"Cha Residence, Seonmi speaking."Â
The woman's voice is tired, and Heeseung squeezes his eyes shut as he speaks. "Hi, Mrs. Cha. It's uhmâŠit's Heeseung." The line is quiet for a moment, before a gentle sigh is heard. "Hi, sweetheart. Long time." "I know, I'm sorry." He mumbles, earning a soft laugh from her. "Nothing to be sorry for. Are you alright? How's your wife?"
"She's good. She's here, actually. Would you like to say hello?" He holds the phone towards you, and you clear your throat as you say a soft hello. "Oh, hello! Wow, I've never heard you speak, I've only seen photos of you. How are you? Heeseung treating you well, I hope?" You feel your cheeks heat as you respond, "Yeah, yes ma'am. I'm okay, how are you?" "Oh, you know. Same old, struggling. Did you guys need something from me? Maybe something of Soyoung's?" She sounds so tired, it makes your heart ache.
"Actually, we called with an update. If you're in the headspace to hear it." Heeseung says shakily, and you find yourself pressing a kiss to his cheek, stamping your lipstick on his skin. He leans into your lips, and you brush another in the same place before leaning your head on his shoulder.
"Oh, boy. Another sighting, I assume?" Mrs. Cha sounds defeated, and you can hear the clicking of a keyboard in the distance. You clear your throat, and Heeseung holds the phone to you. "I think it's better if my wife tells you." "Sweetheart, please get on with it."
You take the phone gingerly, clearing your throat. "For starters, I'm a therapist in the next town over. I started that job a few weeks back, and I've been taking new patients. Your daughter was one of them." Nothing is heard on the other end, and Heeseung gives you a nod to keep talking. His hand squeezes around your thigh, and you speak again. "She's changed her name, and she's married. IâŠshe talked about everything that led to her disappearance as well as everything going on in her life currently. She's well, and she's established."
"SoâŠyou found her?" You hear a soft sob from the other end, your own eyes stinging. "We did. She talked a lot about Heeseung, so I didn't tell her we were married. I drove her to the precinct on Friday to see him again for the first time since she disappeared, and it did not go well, to say the least. However, she did give us permission to share her information with you, and I've got everything in front of me if you've got a pen or something to jot it down." You hear the rustling of paper and pens knocking against each other as someone talks in the background. Mrs. Cha sniffles into the phone, "Go ahead. I'm ready." You read everything out to her, spelling street names and offering to send photos over as well. "And you're sure it's her? You know it?" Mrs. Cha's voice is shaky as you hear a chair get pushed back, and Heeseung replies, "Positive. We wouldn't have called if we weren't sure, I was in denial when Y/N told me." "Do youâŠshould I call her? I know she's angry with me, she must be." Mrs. Cha sounds distant, like she's walking somewhere. "She may be angry, but I'm sure she wouldn't have allowed us to give you her information if she didn't want you to contact her or know of her reappearance." You say gently, and hear Mrs. Cha laugh through her presumed tears.
"You chose the right profession, Y/N. I can see how easily this comes to you."Â
Heeseung's eyes widen as he looks down at you, your own lips spread in a shy smile. His eyes speak for themselves â See? Told you.
"Thank you." You murmur, and Heeseung squeezes your leg as he clears his throat. "Well, that's all we really called for. Feel free to keep us updated, we'll get all the paperwork for the case figured out. We can handle our end privately, but you can choose how to go about things on your end." "Thank you, sincerely. I know the last nine years have been grueling for you as well, Heeseung. I hope you know you'll always have a place in our family and our hearts, and you're welcome in our home any time. You as well, Y/N. We'd love to have you over for dinner."
You gape as Heeseung answers gently, saying he'll figure out some dates and get back to her. She agrees, and a soft take care is whispered from your husband before he hangs up.
He leans forward to put his phone and Chaeyoung's file on the coffee table, before sighing. You rest your arm against the back of the couch, smushing your cheek with the heel of your palm. He slumps against the cushions silently, his hand slinking up and down your thigh.
"Feel better? This was somehow under and overwhelming." "Weight off my fucking shoulders, I'll tell you that much." He huffs, rubbing his face in frustration. You hum, reaching to run your fingers through his hair as he turns his head to face you, a pout on his lips. "Why does everything have to suck?" "Does everything suck?" You repeat thoughtfully, looking around your living room. "I mean, consider the good things. We've got this wonderful home, we have our health and your family. We have our jobs. Job market is garbage, you know." He sighs, looking around the room. "Now I just sound ungrateful." You snort, before pushing yourself up and straddling his lap, wrapping your arms around his shoulders. You settle high on his thighs, his hands instinctively coming to rest on your hips. "You're not ungrateful, you're just going through the motions. I honestly thought you'd be worse. That's why this all seems so underwhelming to me, I thought it would be a much bigger ordeal, that you'd be excited to see her." "I would have been, if it weren't for the fact that she left at her own will. A part of me just wishes she would have fucking said something, I could've talked to her. Or her parents, or something, you know?" He's frustrated as you nod, thumbing the lobe of his ear. "Oh, but you can't save everyone. You're only human. I know that's one of the first fates you face when you do the kind of work you do." He huffs, "I just have questions that I won't ever get answers to. It bothers me because no matter what she does or says, it just feels like betrayal over and over again. If we pile the fact that she said all those shitty things to you, it just makes me hate her more."
"Hating people is so taxing, baby." You shrug, "It's not good for the spirit, or your hairline." "Keep making jokes about my hairline, see how that works out for you." He scoffs, making you scrunch your nose at him. "I've been making jokes about your hairline since we met, I think it's worked out just fine. I have this house, I have this couchâŠ" You trail off as you lean closer, brushing your nose with his, his eyes wide as he looks up at you. "I have you, on this couch, in this house and your signature on a paper that says you're my husband. What does that say about you?" "That I like gorgeous women in suits who make fun of me, I guess." He shrugs, his hands squeezing your hips as you brush your lips against his. You move away as he tries to connect your lips, making him roll his eyes. "Just kiss me, will you?" "Is that how we get the things we want?" You pull back, your brow raised as he sighs. This was a game you liked to play every once in a while, knowing that Heeseung easily flustered when you took charge. He reveled in it, sure, but it definitely took him a bit to accept that you called the shots.
"Babe, come on." "Hm, I don't like that answer." Shrugging, you start moving off his lap, earning a groan as he uses his strength to hold your hips flush to his. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Please kiss me, I need it." "You need it?" You scoff, your hands on his shoulders as he blushes, his tongue peeking out to wet his lips. "I need you."
"Yeah? Need me where?" Your eyes look at him expectantly, feeling him shift under you with nerves, looking down. Your gaze doesn't waver as you tilt his chin back up, his eyes full of lust and adoration. "Where?" "Here." His cheeks flushed impossibly deeper as he pouted up at you, moving your fingertips to his lips. He kisses the pads of your fingers, making you coo as you press your lips to the tip of his nose. He chases your lips as you plant kisses around his entire face, stamping your lipstick on his skin carefully. "Baby, please."Â
"I love you." You murmur against his lips, making his eyes flutter shut as you finally kiss him. His hands move to your waist, pulling your chest flush to his as you shrug off your suit jacket, tossing it to the side as you gently lick into his mouth. He groans into your mouth, his fingers flexing against your body as you suck on the tip of his tongue. His hips rut up against you slowly, a whine from your throat making you pull away, dragging your lips down his jaw.Â
"Can I take care of you, baby?" You murmur against the shell of his ear, making him shiver as you nip at the lobe, a quiet please from his throat. His hands twitch at your sides, soft whines from his lips as you trail your tongue down the slope of his neck. You feel his fingers move to fumble with the buttons of your vest, before he untucks your shirt, sliding his hands slightly under it to feel the heat of your skin against his.Â
"I love you so much." He mumbles as you kiss his swollen lips again chastely, your fingers undoing your shirt buttons as he watches your face with low eyes. His hands snake higher on your stomach, before the tips of fingers brush your bare breasts. His eyes widen as he pulls away, jaw falling slack as he sees your lack of undergarments. "Baby." "Just enjoy it." You roll your eyes, shivering as he runs his thumbs over your pebbled nipples. He leans forward slightly, before your hand cards through his hair. "This is not about me." "You said enjoy it. How can I, if you don't let me?" He scoffs, moving your hand from its spot on the nape of his neck, pulling you forward into his mouth. His tongue swirls expertly around the hardened nub, your hand finding and digging into the back of the couch. Heeseung feels his head spinning as he breathes you in, the soft scent of his favorite perfume on your skin. You groan quietly as your hips roll against his, a soft fuck from your lips as he carefully drags his teeth on the sensitive bud. He moves to the other side, your hand tangling in his hair again as he plants wet kisses across your chest. "So perfect for me." He murmurs, flattening his tongue against your nipple as his hands move to undo your belt. He pulls it through the loops within seconds, tossing it aside and palming your ass over your pants, moving you over his bulge slowly. He relishes in the sounds you make, whimpers from your throat making his cock twitch in his pants as he continues to lap at your chest. "Always so fucking beautiful. You make me insane."
You whine in response, pulling his head away from your chest and reconnecting your lips. He feels your hand snake down between your bodies, palming at his hardened cock through his sweatpants. He groans into your mouth, his hips rutting into your hand involuntarily. You slip your tongue in his mouth, letting him messily kiss you back as he tangles a hand in your hair â your own beneath the waistband of his sweatpants, tugging at them gently. He obliges, lifting his hips for you to pull them down to his knees. You pull away from his lips as much as the hand in your hair will allow, your hand wrapping around his leaking cock gently. He shudders as you stroke him, whining against your lips when you pull his hand out of your hair, sliding off his lap and settling between his knees. He lets out a breath as you glance up at him through thick lashes, before pressing a kiss to his inner thigh. His hands move back to your hair, gathering it into a messy ponytail as you continue to drag your lips around his skin, faint lipstick stains marking your path. He feels his stomach cave the moment you swirl your tongue around his tip, a broken moan cutting through the air.
"S'fucking pretty like thisâŠ" He groans, watching as you take him deeper, hollowing your cheeks slightly. Your tongue laps at the underside of his cock, following the thick vein as his tip hits the back of your throat. Gagging around him, you feel his hips jerk up involuntarily, a murmured apology as you pull off, shaking your head. "Want it, want you to do that."Â
Your ears are watery as you look up at him, your hand wrapped around his shaft as his lips parted in a soft grunt. He wipes his thumb across your lower lip before he takes his cock in his hand, "Beautiful."
You feel your cheeks flush, not responding to the compliment as he opens your mouth for you. You stick out your tongue, making him smirk as he slides the heavy head of his cock on it. You blink up at him before you sink down on him, hearing a soft sigh fall from his lips. He rocks his hips up slowly, throwing his head back with a whimper as you gag around him.
"Feel s'fucking good, baby. Love you so much, fuckâŠ" You feel your skin prickle at the praise, your eyes brimming with tears as the tip of his cock brushes the back of your throat, a groan making him shiver. "Always so good to meâŠ"
You hum as best as you can, feeling his hand tighten in your hair as the tell-tale whimper falls from your husband's lips. He pulls you off almost reluctantly, staring up at the ceiling and biting down on his lip as you look up at him, seeing his chest move in shallow breaths. "Heeâ" "Need to feel you." He pulls you off your knees by your wrists, making you slide your knee between his for balance. His lips feel frantic as he kisses you messily, groaning at the slight taste of himself inside your mouth as you try to keep up. "Need to cum inside you, baby." His lips ghost over yours as he unbuttons your slacks, your teeth nipping at his bottom lip as he hooks his thumbs into the belt loops. You let him tug them down, stepping out of them when he snaps the waistband of your underwear against your skin. "Take it off." "What, do you want me to strip for you?" You roll your eyes, and he smirks lightly. "We can spin that back another time. Take it off." You oblige, feeling your husband's hands wrap around your thighs as you kick your underwear off to the side. He pulls you forward, instinctively making you straddle him slightly before he looks up, his hand snaking between your thighs. "Do you needâ"
You shake your head quickly as he glides his fingers through your wet folds, his eyes widening as you shiver. He holds his hand up to the light, your arousal stringy between his fingers, gathering around his wedding band. He peers up at you, "Really?" "Shut up." Your cheeks burn as he scoffs out a laugh, before running his tongue over his fingers. "All fours, please." He tilts his head towards the free space on the couch, your eyes narrowing as you do as he says, hearing the thwip of his shirt being pulled over his head.Â
"You know," You mumble as you settle on your elbows, "This is not-ah!" The warm feeling of Heeseung's tongue on your clit makes you jolt, and you feel him smile into your skin as his hands rest on your hips. He groans as you push your hips against his face, your fingers digging into the couch cushion as you whine into the brown suede. "So fucking wet, for what? A little kissing?" He's talking down to you, amused at the way your pussy clenches around his tongue, your whimper muffled by your shirt sleeve, "I love you." "Yeah? My messy girl loves me?" His voice is clearer now, and you feel his hand grip your hip as he drags the tip of his cock through your folds with a hiss. You push back against him with a whine, earning a firm smack to the back of your thigh. "Behave. You can wait."
You can hear him mutter under his breath as he ruts against you, his breathing shaky as he holds you steady. You feel him sink inside you slowly, the wet squelch making your cheeks burn in embarrassment as you whimper at the stretch. "I know honey, I know." Heeseung's voice is almost goading as he rocks into you slowly, biting down on his lip as you clench around him. "You take me so well, baby. Just love this dick, huh?" He holds your hips tight as you nod, your voice lost on you as he brushes that spongy spot inside you. You're pliant in his hands, your eyes rolling back when you feel his hand come down on your ass sharply, a moan falling from your lips into the cushion.
"Filthy little thing." He mutters, running his hand over the reddened skin. "Love being treated like a slut, don't you?" His fingers move to hold onto your waist, hearing you mumble something before leaning down slightly. "Don't you?" "Yours. Your slut." You mumble as you nod shyly, the duality making his chest ache as he coos. "All mine, yeah? Get this wet for me only, right?" The sound of your soft moans is almost drowned out by the smack of his hips against your ass.Â
"Always feel so good around me, baby, shit.." His hand tangles in your hair, pulling you up carefully. You whimper as your back hits his chest, your hand holding onto the back of the couch as he bullies his cock into you. He feels you clamp down around him, your skin hot to the touch as he slides his hand down, circling your clit with his fingers.
"Always take such good care of me, my gorgeous girl. My wife, fuck, I love you." He mutters into your neck, his eyes catching your earrings swinging as he nips at your skin. You whine inwardly, looking away from him as you clench around him, your orgasm on the tip of your tongue as he thrusts into you.Â
His hand moves from your hair to cradle your face, turning you just slightly to see the fucked out glaze in your eyes, your lips swollen and slick with spit. He smiles softly, brushing his lips over yours, "I love you."
You close your eyes as he kisses you messily, nothing but teeth and tongue as your orgasm washes over you, a whiny moan into your husband's mouth. He carefully tugs off your vest and shirt, "Just a little more baby, almost there. Gonna fill you up, yeah?" "Y-Yeah." You whimper as he lets you fall forward slowly, your trembling thighs only egging him on as he runs his hands over your bare back. "So fucking perfect. S-Such a perfect woman, could never ask for anyone better. M-My angel, my everything." He's rambling, forcing himself to focus as he overstimulates you chasing his orgasm. You mewl into the cushion relentlessly, pushing against him when he notices you holding your hand out behind your back. He interlocks your fingers, before spilling inside you with a whimper. He shudders above you, your hand squeezing his gently before you let go. He digs his fingers into your hips deeply, earning a groan as you shakily try to sit up on your elbows. You only manage to push back on him, a choked moan ringing through the air as he grabs at your hips. He winces as he pulls out carefully, his eyes glued to the way you clench around nothing with soft breaths. His fingers ghost over your hole as you push his release out, not realizing how sensitive you are as he smears it all over your glistening folds. "H-Heeseung!" You reach back to swat at him, making his eyes snap up to look at you. He smiles sheepishly, apologizing under his breath as he wipes his fingers on his shirt.Â
"You okay?" He murmurs, his cheeks aflame as he realizes how spent you are, your hips almost giving out as he holds you up. You give him a tired nod, "We cannot fuck on my precious couch again. People sit here." He scoffs, and you feel the soft cotton of his shirt wiping down your legs. You feel him shift behind you, flinching when you feel his shirt wiping between your thighs. "Can't we just shower?" "We can, but I can't lieâŠI kind of like watching it drip out." He admits quietly, and you roll your eyes. "I feed so many of your guilty pleasures, but this is one I'm going to cut short. I'm all sticky." "I can make you stickier, if you want." He runs his hands up your thighs, and you scoff as you use your remaining strength to flip yourself onto your back. He's red in the face, and not just from your lipstick, his eyes glued to your center. "Hee, stop. You fucking freak." "This fucking freak is your husband, I'd be nicer to me if I were you. I suggest you tell me you love me, that's a pretty good start." He shrugs, acting nonchalant as he leans down. You give him an amused look as you run your fingers through his hair, "And I married you, why?" "Because I'm tall, tan, young, lovely." He shrugs, making you snort. "Girl from Ipanema, is that you?" "I love you." He wrinkles his nose as you press a soft kiss to it, his hands carefully moving your hair out of your eyes. "Thank you. I didn't realize how much I needed this. How much IâŠneed you. I'm sorry it's taken me this long, baby." Your cheeks warm at his confession, your thumbs gently stroking his cheeks. "I love you. I'm always here when you need a little TLC." "And when I don't?" "And when I do, and when I don't. Whenever, you know I'm here." You assure softly, his eyes slightly glazed over as you press a chaste kiss to his lips. "However, I will admitâŠmy TLC of preference right now is a hot shower. Care to join me?" "You and your hot showers. Can you even stand up?"
"If I can't, it just means you can eat me out in the shower." You shrug, seeing the wheels turn in your husband's head as he locks your legs around his waist. A shriek falls from your lips as he picks you up, your arms wrapping around his shoulders as he moves towards the bathroom with a kiss to your lips. "And suddenly, I too, love hot showers. Shall we?"
Tuesday, 12:33pm.
It'd been a few weeks since you and Heeseung reached out to the Cha family, and the case had been officially declared closed by the Seventh Precinct. However, such a reappearance after so many years for such a prolific family meant many, many interviews and involvement with the press. It meant seeing Chaeyoung and her husband, as well as her family over and over again, even when it came to things that weren't about her.
Your relationship was still not perfect â with you and Heeseung slowly working through your issues, things got easier. He managed to submit the paperwork for his vacation to start on Friday, and had some final things to settle at the Seoul Central District Court with a few attorneys involved in a case he and Jay were attempting to break into. He'd called you to meet him and Sunoo for lunch and a meeting to bring you on as an expert witness, as you had a short day in the office.
Short day in the office does not warrant a short day outside of it, though â and you found your husband crowded by reporters and flashing cameras as you tried to quietly make your way into the courthouse. You hoped they wouldn't see you â Heeseung had been pissed enough already when a few reporters dragged your name through the mud when Chaeyoung gave her side of the story, pictures of you that he loved now torn to shreds by internet trolls and what little social media you did have had been flooded with hateful comments. You wound up deleting everything, and staying away from your phone as much as possible. Heeseung arranged private security, and even had Sunghoon assigned to keep an eye out for any suspicious activity around you.Â
Nothing had happened, and you were sure nothing would â but you couldn't lie, you felt safer when you and Heeseung were behind the locked doors of your home, hidden away in your bedroom.
You could hear the reporters shouting questions at Heeseung, the tick in his jaw evident as he answered one question at a time. You watch from afar a bit, your facemask protecting you from being discovered as you inch closer. You can see his patience begin to thin and you're about to barrel down the steps to him when you hear a reporter shout over all the others.
"Lieutenant, your wife has been dragged by the media in all forms. What are your thoughts on that, considering that Jeon Chaeyoung was once your life-long friend?" Heeseung's face hardens, and he pinches the bridge of his nose as he speaks.
"I have nothing to say on Mrs. Jeon, I cannot understand why she'd speak about Dr. Lee that way. Please write that down, put that into the world. She's not just my wife, she's her own person and she had a huge role in this case. I would have lost my mind if it weren't for her, and her impact should not be reduced simply because we're married." You feel your chest fill with warmth as you take a few more steps down, a reporter spotting you and you press a finger to your facemask, your wedding ring making her eyes widen. She says nothing as you listen to Heeseung speak.
"Dr. Lee was a pertinent witness to the entire case, and had she not been involved, had she not said something, Mrs. Jeon's case would've remained open and no one would know of her whereabouts. Her family had been in absolute shambles for the last nine years, and frankly, as harsh as it sounds, I'm glad that it's finally over. Dr. Lee is not to blame for whatever upset feelings Mrs. Jeon may have, or whatever resentment she may have towards myself. If she wants to drag anyone through the dirt, she might as well drag me. Dr. Lee is entirely innocent in this, she was a huge stepping stone in bridging crucial pieces of information together and restoring the Cha family. In other words, keep my wife's name out of your mouth unless you're praising her. I'm tired of hearing this, so I have nothing more to say on the matter."
Your eyes are wide as he shrugs, before the reporter who spotted you makes a few moves up the steps, trying not to alert anyone else. You tilt your head at her, and she quietly steps up to you. She holds her recorder up slightly, and you nod, beckoning her closer with your hand.
"Dr. Lee, how do you feel about Lieutenant Lee coming to your defense amongst the influx of hate from netizens?" You lean down to her to speak into the small microphone, clearing your throat. "I think Lieutenant Lee is one of the most kind-hearted, driven, loving people in my life. There's a reason he's my husband, you know. I couldn't ask for a better man." The reporter's eyes soften as Heeseung turns around, bidding the reporters a goodbye as he buttons his coat up, trekking back up the stairs. He looks up, his eyes meeting yours as you give him a little wave. He walks up to you, giving the reporter a curt nod before slipping his fingers in yours.Â
The reporter gives you a soft thank you, before walking down the steps. You let Heeseung guide you up the steps, and glance over your shoulder to see reporters taking photos of the two of you from behind. You nudge him with your elbow, and he looks down at you. "Yes?" "Kiss me." You tilt your head towards the reporters, and he snorts as the two of you reach the doors. "You sure?" "Positive." You nod as you pull your mask off, the camera flashes almost blinding as they watch you press your lips to Heeseung's, his arm wrapping around your waist as his hand cradles your cheek. Your lipstick stains his mouth as you pull away, and you give the reporters a cheeky thumbs up as he pulls you into the courthouse.
Sunoo's eyes are wide as you walk into his quarters with Heeseung, your lipstick now also stamped on his cheek from a kiss you gave him in the hallway. He smiles warmly as you offer a hug, embracing you tightly. "God, it's so nice to see you in love." He murmurs into your hair, patting your back before you all take a seat at his desk. The three of you are going over the options for lunch when you hear a knock at the door, your head whipping around to see your mother entering the office. Your eyes widen, and Heeseung is up before you know it. He's greeting her warmly, her face remaining stoic as he takes her coat. She looks tired, and you stand on shaky legs.
"Hello, Mother." You say softly, your eyes flickering to Heeseung and Sunoo as they stand to the side. She steps in front of you, her eyes scanning you carefully. You wince as she steps slightly closer, only for her to breathe out softly.
"I wanted to speak to you earlier this week, amidst everything in the media. However, I'm too prolific and I worried I'd be followed to your home, so I left a few messages on your answering machine. I assume you didn't receive them, so is now a good time?" She's still professional, your mother had no idea how to be comforting or warm. You nod slowly, shoving your trembling hands into your coat. "S-Sure. Yeah, we can talk." Your mother had never cared who was around when she spoke to you about anything. It was one of the more mortifying things about her, but she made up for it by keeping her voice quiet enough that only you could hear her.
"May I touch you?" She asks with a twinge in her voice you'd never heard, and you nod slowly. "Okay." She doesn't wait for another second, throwing her arms around you as she pulls you into a tight embrace. Your eyes are wide as you look at Heeseung and Sunoo, their own the size of saucers as you awkwardly wrap your arms around her. "Are youâŠalright?" "I'm so sorry, Y/N. I read everything that you said in your interviews, about Chaeyoung and her reasons behind leaving, and how deeply you understood her dilemma. I never realized I was pushing you away, and I'm incredibly sorry if I ever made you feel like I wasn't supportive of your dreams or career choices. I know that this may be a too little, too late sort of situation, but I couldn't let more time go by without letting you know how proud I am of you and everything you've accomplished, not just as a professional but as a woman, as my daughter, as a wife."
Your eyes are stinging with tears as Heeseung's jaw drops, your mother pulling back to cup your face in her hands. "And I'll sue that little bitch for all she has for dragging you through the mud. I'll do it, I'll wring her dry of every asset she's ever acquired."
Her eyes are full of tears as you gape at her, before she presses a kiss to your forehead. "I love you so much, darling. I'm so, so sorry."
"Mom-" "I'm so glad to have you, darling. Please don't disappear on me, I promise you I cannot handle it." You let her pull you back into her embrace, the tears streaming down your cheeks before she pulls away quickly. "Alright, I've got a meeting I'm running late to. I just saw you in the window and I needed to pop in and talk to you. As you were, I'll give you a call later." She gives the three of you a curt nod, before taking her coat and skirting back out of Sunoo's office.
The three of you are silent, your arms wrapped around yourself as you cover your mouth with your hand. You don't wipe your tears as they stream down, and you look up at the men staring at you in shock. "She said she's proud of me." You whine suddenly, and Heeseung lets out a soft laugh as you walk into his embrace, Sunoo smiling to himself as Heeseung strokes your hair, sharing a glance with his long-time friend as you sob into his shirt. "Oh, my baby. You deserve all that and more."
"Should we push the meeting? I think we've got a lot of big feelings to work out, Dr. Lee." Sunoo speaks up gently, and you pout as Heeseung agrees before you can say anything. You mumble out an apology, but Sunoo shakes his head, waving you off. "Let me lead you out the backway, those reporters would have a ball with your crying face."
"Shut up, Sunoo." You scoff, making him snicker as he leads you both out of his office, your head bowed as you let Heeseung hide you from onlookers. You both quietly thanked Sunoo as he opened the door for you and bid you farewell, saying he'd try and get everything done before Heeseung's allotted vacation time. They agreed to meet again on Thursday, with Sunoo giving your shoulder a soft squeeze.
"Give yourself some more credit, Y/N. You deserve it."
Saturday, 4:44pm.
"You found it? You look so beautiful, holy shit." Heeseung was laid on the bed, held up by his elbows as you stood in front of the mirror, a quizzical look on your face as you clipped in your earrings. You purse your lips, turning to face him, the sarong skirt of the dress he'd made you swinging slightly.
"You sure? It's not tooâŠshowy?" You pout, running your hands over the soft white fabric. You'd dug this dress back out specifically for this occasion, renewing your vows with your husband on a simple vacation in the middle of nowhere. By middle of nowhere, you mean the same field he proposed to you in, two hours out of Seoul and likely full of flowers this time of year.
"Baby, it's just you and me. You can be as showy as you want in your dress, as bummy as you want in your sweatpants. You're fucking angelic." He pulls you to him by your hips, "I did great on this hem, you can't lie." "Wonderful, yes." You roll your eyes, feeling his hands snake under the skirt. You allow it, feeling your cheeks warm as he snaps the waistband of your underwear against your hip. "Let me go down on you." You sigh, rubbing your temples as your husband presses a kiss to your cleavage. "Heeseung, the sun is going to set and we're going to be doing this in the dark." "Can I go down on you after?" He questions, not really paying attention as he stands, his hands low on your back as he pulls you to him. "Heeseung." "Two orgasms, right after we're done, on the hood of my car." He offers, making you snort. "One orgasm, after we're done, in the backseat." "I'll take it!" He presses a chaste kiss to your lips, making you giggle as he lands a soft smack to your ass. "Stop it!" "You love me! Now get your cute ass in the car, we've got shit to do."
And it feels easy. It feels light, sitting next to Heeseung as he pulls out of the driveway with one hand on the steering wheel and the other holding your fingers tightly. It feels good, listening to your husband sing along softly to soft jazz songs on the radio before you plug in your phone, and then hearing him sing along to your playlists. It feels like getting a breath of fresh air when you see the afternoon sunlight beaming on his skin, his white shirt reflecting the light painfully into your eyes. It feels like the way your heart starts beating a little faster when you catch a whiff of his spicy cologne, your eyes falling on him with a soft smile. It feels like an emotional orgasm when he times playing No Song Without You by HONNE perfectly to when you arrive, your pout being kissed off frantically by your attentive, doting husband. It feels like falling in love when he holds you close, pressing his lips anywhere you'd allow him to as you both reach into your pockets for the thick packets of words you've written. It feels like falling in love when he goes off script, holding the papers in his hand as he looks into your eyes. It feels like falling in love when he kisses your tears off your face as you tell him how much you appreciate his changes, it feels like falling in love when he says you should never thank him for doing what's right. It feels like falling in love, when he pulls a box out of his pocket and presents yet another gold ring to add to your set, with your initials engraved on the outside.
It feels like falling in love with he suggests you both pick flowers from the field to press when you get home. It feels like falling in love when he holds your hand and pulls you close when you've wandered too far, it feels like falling in love when he's kissing you against the hood of his car. It feels like falling in love when he carries you into the backseat and you wind up naked in his lap, a whining and writhing mess as he tells you how pretty you are, how much he loves you, how bad he wants to get you pregnant so everyone knows you're his. It feels like falling in love, when on the ride home, he can't keep his hands off you.
It feels like falling in love, when he wastes no time getting you in the bedroom, your dress on the floor with his shirt and pants. It feels like falling in love when he draws a bath for the two of you, it feels like falling in love when he tells you I love you as he washes your hair, your body, your face.
It feels like falling in love again, but this time? You don't feel like you're falling alone.
BABEYUN © 2024. no translations, reposting or modifications are allowed. do not claim as your own. viewer discretion is advised. your media consumption is your responsibility.
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#enhypen#enhypen x reader#enha x reader#enhypen angst#enha smut#heeseung x reader#heeseung smut#heeseung x you#lee heeseung x reader#heeseung imagine#heeseung fic#enhypen fic#enhypen series#heeseung angst#enhypen hard hours#enhypen fanfiction#enhypen imagines#enhypen heeseung#heeseung#enha#lee heeseung#enhypen scenarios#kpop imagines#kpop scenarios#kpop fanfic#kvanity
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More of you to worship | Spencer Reid
Pairing: Spencer Reid x gn!reader
Category: fluff, mild angst
Summary: Spencer Reid has insecurities about his changing body, and you assure him you love him regardless.
Content: body insecurity, established relationship, one mention of New Year
Word count:Â 1.5k
A/N: Quick little oneshot to end the year! You can thank @reidgif for this one because this gif rekindled my hyperfixation on his tummy. And then I saw a clip of Aisha (Taraâs actress) saying MGG weighs 11 pounds and has the metabolism of a rabbit on speed (lmfao) anyway, I took that and ran with it and now here we are. As someone who struggles with dysmorphia, I did my very best to be as sensitive with this as possible. Last fix of the year, I hope you enjoy it!
Spencer had begun to notice it a few weeks ago. At first, he had foolishly thought that there was simply something wrong with the shirt he had worn. Tactile sensitivity had always been something he dealt with, and this was no different. There had been a certain peculiarity in the fit of his shirt that he couldnât quite pinpoint. Days continued, and it became a persistent bother, impeding his movement when he aimed, and inhibiting his general comfort.
It wasnât until today, sitting in the bedâone he shared with youâthat he finally had the time to inspect what was going on. The two of you had just gotten home from Rossi, who had graciously hosted a New Yearâs dinner at his mansion. Spencer had admittedly eaten more than his fill, and thatâs when he realizedâit showed.
At once, the problem appeared. He was gaining weight. His shirts were bothering him because they were growing too tight, digging into places where they had previously been loose. The realization made him pause, as he stared down at himself.
Sitting on the bed, his stomach had gathered into a bulge, straining against the cloth. It was a new sight, not necessarily unwelcomed, but it seemed to send his mind reeling (to be fair, a lot sent his mind reeling nowadays, he was running on fumes, his only reprieve being you.)
He had never been muscular, had never found the need to be muscular. The team was nearly faultless because everyone filled a role, and they executed that well. He was, has always been, the genius, the expert on everything, as Hotch had called him once. Being the genius of the BAU meant that he had value. Relevance. It brought him great deal of pride, being able to contribute and pick up on patterns and little details that the majority of the team might miss.
It made him feel like he mattered. Needed.
So what if he couldnât tackle a man down? They used to have Derek and Hotch for that, and now that role was being fulfilled by Luke and Matt, both of whom were utter specimens of the male physique.
But his time in prison had proven to him that he couldnât rely on just his brains. Not when he had three burly inmates looking for trouble, looking for someone easy. It pained him that someone easy meant someone that looked like him. Tall, gangly, defenseless.
He took another breath and frowned as the fabric around his stomach grew tighter, taut at having to contain this belly that had formed over the course of the evening. A food baby, you liked to call it, because your own tummy was bonded to several factors as wellâhormones, food, water intakeâthat made it fluctuate frequently, normally.
Normal. He tried to remind himself that this was normal, gaining weight was normal, but then again, how could someone tell what was normal when theirâhisâwhole life, he had little experience with the word? Growing up a genius and taking care of an ailing mother skewed whatever sense of normalcy he could have developed.
Besides, his normal meant lanky, thin. His body, the way it was framed and built, had always been long and erring on the side of delicate. It wasnât that he hadnât tried to bulk up, it was that his muscles were lean; that was simply how his anatomy worked. It would take a lot more effort to gain more muscle, effort that he, admittedly, didnât want to exert. It wasnât his role.
And now, he looked down at his stomach with a crease on his brow, mind whirring with explanations. Weight fluctuations are normal, and they were okay, and he was nearing forty, anyway, of course his metabolism was beginning to slow down, human adultsâ bodily functions tend to do that, it was scientific and â
âHoney?â
He looked up, and there you were, your loveliness framed by the plain doorway. Somehow, you made it seem more magical, less boring, as though your very presence just made everything better. He smiled, holding out a hand for you, forcing the wave of insecurity down his throat, down his chest, trying to bury it deep in the recesses of his body.
You walked closer, and the thoughts punched through his attempts to silence themâyou wouldnât find him attractive anymore.
Something must have shifted on his face, a sliver of that anxiety creating fresh lines between his brows, because you paused. A hand ran across your cheek, and he felt the weight of your concern in the action.
âWhatâs wrong, Spence?â
He drew you closer, pulled you onto his lap. He couldnât lie to you, not out of his lack of skill, but due to your incessant ability to somehow sniff out the truth from him, one way or another.
âI think Iâm outgrowing my shirts.â he said, softening the words with a chuckle. He was ashamed to admit that it was affecting him more than he anticipated; maybe humor would lessen its significance.
âArenât you a little too old to be going through puberty?â you asked, matching the teasing tone of his voice. The difference was glaring though; his voice was awfully strained, and yours was lighter, more at ease.
Still, he laughed, buried his face at the nape of your neck. âTheyâre getting tight around my stomach.â
At that, you pulled back. He swallowed the whine that threatened to leave his lips; he was already being so pathetic over a little pudge, he was reaching max capacity. With bated breath, he watched as your gaze ran over him, eyes flickering with recognition when they landed on his torso.
âOh they are,â You replied, hands going up to his shoulders, tugging at the fabric there, âHere too. Huh, I guess weâll have to go shopping then.â
He looked, patiently waited for more.
âWhat?â you asked, eyes crinkling oh so prettily at the corners that he couldnât help but press a kiss over them.
âThatâs it?â he murmured, disbelief coloring his voice. He had anticipated more of a reaction, maybe a suggestion of âoh maybe you should go to the gymâ. But you took it with such stride that he was a little confused.
âYeah, thatâs it.â you laughed, brought a palm down to his stomach, that one place thatâs causing him to basically break down, âShould there be more?â
He shrugged.
Perched on his lap, you frowned as you watched emotions flicker through his eyes. âSpence,â You murmured, kissing his temple, âTalk to me.â
âI just don't want you to think I'm unattractive anymore.â The words felt bitter in his tongue; it was a relief to release them, get them out of his system. âI was never - you know - sexy before, and now I'm gaining weight.â
âSpence,â You interrupted him gently. It wasn't something you did often; his rambles were one of the things you loved about him after all, but it pained you to hear him get so insecure about something so insignificant as his weight, especially since his body wasn't even the thing that made him attractive to you in the first place, âBelly pudge or scrawny, I think you're hot.â
His eyes softened, looking so impossibly hopeful that you couldn't stop the urge to lean in and kiss him. âSeriously,â You murmured, âIt doesn't matter to me. You're handsome, but you're also so intelligent and passionate and sensitive, and those are so much more important than how you look.â
He sagged with relief, arms tightening around you. âYeah?â He asked as he buried his face in your hair.
âYeah, honey. I'm not with you because of your looks,â You replied, then with a little laugh, you added, âAlthough, they certainly are an added bonus.â
His shoulders shook as he chuckled, and you can feel his lips giving you tiny kisses at the crown of your head.
âBesides,â You continued, toying with the hair at the nape of his neck, âThe way I see it, there's physically more of you now - more of you to hug, and to love, more of you to worship.â
He was silent, but his grip on you never faltered, breath fanning gently over your hair. âMore of me to love.â He whispered, âYou're right, that's - that's one way to look at it.â
âMhmm,â You nodded, âBut you really do need to go shopping, can't have you ripping your shirts while you're out on a case. You wouldn't want your team to think you're doing an impromptu strip tease.â
He bursted out laughing, and exhilaration filled your chest. You always took pride in making him laugh, and this was no exception.
âGod, I love you.â He said, pulling back and resting his forehead against yours.
âI love you too.â You smiled, then added, âBesides, I think the pudge is cute. You're on your way to a dad bod.â
He laughed again, and if you could hear that sound on loop forever, then you would be in heaven
#spencer reid#criminal minds#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x self insert#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x y/n#dr spencer reid#criminal minds fic#mgg#criminal minds fanfiction#dr spencer reid fan fiction#spencer reid fan fic#spencer reid fanfiction#doctor spencer reid#spencer reid fluff
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'TRYNA GET YOUR BABY MAMA FULL OF THAT DICK !
đđđđđźđ«đąđ§đ â jing yuan, blade, luocha x fem!reader
đ°đđ«đ§đąđ§đ đŹ & đ§đšđđ â n/sfw content, cheating, squirting, dumbification, neglect (from the husband), overstimulation, toxic relationships, dirty talk, petnames, reader is married, cucking, cowgirl, possessiveness (blade), vouyerism, luocha is your family doctor, etc âą i never thought id write something like this but here we are lol anyway, happy reading and i hope you enjoy !! minors dni & not proofread
đđđđ đđđđ âč àŁȘ Ë
"bounce on me just like that, baby," jing yuan groaned, palming the fat of your ass as you rode him on your husband's couch. "s'big â you're so big, ji," you bit your lip, trying your best to suppress any moans â not wanting your neighbours to suspect anything.
"yeah? even bigger than him?" a sleazy grin adorned jing yuan's lips, your back arched so sinfully as he thrusted up into you. "ngh â!" you threw your head back, clawing his broad shoulders with your pretty nails, that your husband paid for you to get done.
"answer me, sweet girl," he whispered, fondling your bouncing tits before pulling and pinching at your hardened nipples. "d-don't tease!" you swatted at his hand, which only made him pinch harder.
" 'm not teasing, so serious right now baby," his droopy eyes were glinting with mischief â he knew he looked good. you gasped when his hand reached down to flick and rub at your clit, licking his lips at the way you clenched down on his cock.
"gonna cum, pretty?" he captured your lips in a heated kiss before you could even answer him â as if he already knew what you were gonna say. you could practically feel your eyes rolling from the pleasure behind your closed lids, pussy gushing all over his thighs and abdomen â drenching his cock in your juices.
" yesyesyes â 's so big, so much bigger than him â!" you babbled into the messy kiss, back arching even more and pressing your tits against his own chest â
"that's what i thought."
đđđđđ âč àŁȘ Ë
muffled grunts of complaint escaped your husband's gagged mouth, hard cock straining against the rough fabric of his slacks.
"enjoying the view, cheating piece of shit?" blade had you spread eagle on you and your soon-to-be ex husband's shared bed â with you chanting his name like a prayer everytime his cock hit that one spot with unbelievable precision.
"mmph!" your husband growled â veins popping out from his forehead as he tried his best not to hump the air. fuck, you looked borderline delirious getting split open by your co-workers cock; pupils dilated with lust â practically having hearts swimming in your eyes for blade.
"look at 'em, baby â look at how fuckin' hard the bastard is," he forcibly turned your head over to your husband and the man almost didn't recognise you â tongue lolling out with each heavy thrust from blade, sweat dripping down your sinful body.
you didn't even pay attention to the tied-down man â all too focused on the way blade's thick cock rearranged your guts. "see how she turns into a dumb little slut for my dick?" blade spat, cockiness dripping from his words â sharp hipbones digging into the soft skin of your thighs with each slam of his hips.
"who does this pussy belong to?" blade turned your head back to face him, licking the tears that rolled down your heated cheeks. "y-you! all yours â it belongs to you!" you babbled mindlessly, causing a devilish smile to appear on blade's lips â
"oh yeah? and what's my name?"
"bladeeeâ! oh fu-fuck, bla-de!" you cried out before spraying your juices all over him â some of it even coating his abs.
"good fuckin' girl."
đđđđđđ âč àŁȘ Ë
"are you sure you wanna do this?" luocha whispered against your lips, his minty breath filling your senses. "please," you begged, rolling your hips on his lap to show your want â no, need for the blonde man.
it's not like your husband was a good man either â always out drinking and partying, while you stayed at home. alone. he brushed you off everytime you asked about the lipstick stains on his collar â saying you were being dramatic, you were sick of it. could he really blame you for wanting luocha? the young, handsome family doctor â who was also a gentleman at heart.
"i've got you," luocha's smooth, velvety voice cut off your train of thought, a gloved hand tilting your chin up before pressing his lips to yours. his other hand found purchase at your hip, before snaking up to wrap itself around your waist, pulling you closer to him.
you couldn't help but moan into the kiss â he was certainly good at this, better than your husband, at least. luocha was elegant but warm â the complete opposite of your husband, who was rough and neglectful. the softness of the kiss had you melting in his touch.
a gasp left your lips when luocha flipped you over, your back now turned to him while you laid on your tummy. "luocha.." you all but whined, pushing your ass back against his rigid cock, earning a soft groan from him. he pushed your sundress up, bunching the thin fabric at your waist â "no panties?" he mused, landing a playful slap on your plush ass. gloved hands found your cunt before you could answer, rubbing your bare folds.
an amused chuckle left the man once he felt how damp you were, "already this wet? hmm.. the mister has been neglecting you quite a bit, hasn't he? worry not, i will take great care of you."
©osachiyoâ do not copy, plagiarize and repost my works to any platform, reblogs are very appreciatedâĄ
#đČ àčàŁ àŁȘ Ë đđđđđđđđ... ᶻ đ đ°#hsr smut#honkai star rail smut#hsr#honkai star rail#hsr x reader#honkai star rail x reader#hsr x reader smut#honkai star rail x reader smut#jing yuan x reader#jing yuan smut#jing yuan x reader smut#blade smut#blade x reader#blade x reader smut#luocha smut#luocha x reader#luocha x reader smut
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(A/N: This is part 2 to my Mama Riley au! Thanks for all the love on the first one. †no content warning and I'm trying to keep this gender neutral. Enjoy!!!)
You never expected your angry rant to actually change Simon's behavior. But it has, based on Mama Riley's weekly updates. He's stopping by more, staying longer. He's actually telling her things, mainly about his coworkers, but she's just happy he's finally opening up to her.
While you believe her, you're not seeing the change yourself. Fridays are when you have dinner with Mama Riley, and now apparently Simon too. He just⊠stares at you, a permanent frown on his face. As if you're the one intruding.
Part of you is glad he doesn't talk much. The few sentences he does speak, the low timber of his voice makes your heart race. Behind the scars and unwelcoming attitude, Simon Riley is a handsome man. But your loyalty lies with his mom. He needs to be a better son, and some silly crush isn't going to change your mind that easily.
Ironically, it's said loyalty that makes Simon fall for you so fast. His loyalty is rock solid, a promise held steadfast, an ache he feels in his chest every morning. There's no one Simon cares more about than his mom, and to see someone else care so deeply and fiercely about her makes you so insanely attractive to him. On top of that, your concern for Mama Riley made you willing to say something to him, and Simon knows he's off-putting and scary.
What I'm getting at is that this man is so down bad, it's not even funny. He'd literally take you to the court house and marry you immediately, if you were willing. But you're not, and he's kind of clueless on how to convince you to give him a chance. He'd rather catch a live grenade bare handed than ask his mom.
His mom who clocked the crush immediately, and is trying to help him without helping him. Even if their relationship is strained (much better now thanks to you!), she knows her son, and she knows he has feelings for you. And while she's not trying to meddle, she is trying to create opportunities for y'all to interact and get to know each other.
Opportunities that Simon keeps fumbling because he clams up so bad around you. He's never been good around people in general, and his crush on you just makes it twice as bad. Plus, he's aware that you hate him, and that's not doing him any favors either.
Mama Riley gives him time to make an attempt, only to watch him struggle and usually fail. But the attempts he's making with small talk, bad jokes, bringing you small knick knacks from deployment; it seems to be working. You're both opening up to each other, growing a friendship.
But as the months pass, nothing grows beyond a friendship. You don't want to ruin things between yourself and Mama Riley. Plus, you're not entirely sure where Simon's feelings lie. He's just as weird and off-putting as he was in the beginning, just now he tells you bad jokes and calls you âloveâ.
And, while Mama Riley promised herself that she wouldn't meddle - Simon's a grown man after all, he should be able to handle this - it's almost painful for her to watch the way you and Simon dance around each other. Nobody here is getting any younger, and after almost a year of watching you two, she decides to take matters into her own hands.
Simon's two months into deployment, when Mama Riley invites you over for routine Friday dinner. You're barely one glass of wine in, when she drops the bombshell on you.
âYou know, Simon's in love with you.â
#simon ghost riley#call of duty#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost riley imagine#cod ghost#simon riley x reader#my writing#simon riley#there will probably be more. I'll have to learn how to make a masterlist but for now it'll be fine i guess lol#mama riley au
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Heavy Duty - wolf hybrid!csc
w.c : 1.5 k â synopsis : you didn't realise your hybrid boyfriend's wolf-like characteristics included having rut cycles.â content warning : smut , established relationship, mentions of sex marathon, lil hardcore, cumming inside w/o protection (other contraceptives taken or not according to your pref), claiming and marking, slight cum play
a/n : mdni !! part one of my 2k followers celebration guys we are there at last đ
Seungcheol had always been differentâhis wolfish nature was apparent from the start. You noticed it in the way his eyes would gleam with a sharp intensity whenever he looked at you, the primal edge to his actions, and the subtle growl of his voice when he was particularly worked up. Being a wolf hybrid, his personality was dominant, protective, and possessive. In and out of bed, he was relentless.
But no one had prepared you for thisâhis rut.
You had heard about ruts from stories and books, but it never occurred to you that Seungcheol would experience one. His wolf side was powerful, but he mostly controlled it. However, this time was different. His first rut since you started dating was about to hit, and you quickly realized that his already high sex drive would skyrocket into something feral, something insatiable.
It began one morning when Seungcheol woke up earlier than usual, his body pressed tightly against yours as if seeking more than warmth. You stirred when you felt his hot breath on your neck, his hand firmly gripping your waist.
"Baby, you're so warm," he whispered, his voice deeper than usual, a low growl lacing his words. "I need you."
His usual morning neediness had an edge today, and you couldnât quite place why. His hands, rough but always tender, started exploring your body more eagerly than before, and you could sense something was different. His touch wasnât just affectionateâit was demanding, almost desperate.
"Seungcheol," you whispered, turning slightly to face him. "You okay?"
His eyes were glowing, almost like he was battling something inside. He kissed you deeply, his tongue invading your mouth as if tasting, devouring. His large hands gripped your thighs, pulling you against his chest, and his hardened length was already pressing insistently between your legs.
"I need you⊠so fucking badly," he murmured against your lips, his voice raw. "I donât know what's wrong with me. I canât stop thinking about you."
You whimpered softly at the heat of his words, your body responding instantly. You had always loved the way Seungcheol made you feel wanted, but this was different. He seemed almost⊠lost in his need for you.
It didnât take long for him to tug your clothes off, his lips trailing fiery kisses down your neck, sucking and biting just hard enough to leave marks. You gasped as his teeth grazed your skin, and he growled in response, his lips latching onto your nipple, biting gently.
"Seungcheol, what's gotten into you?" you gasped.
His eyes met yoursâdarker, more dangerous. "I think it's my rut," he admitted breathlessly, his voice strained with lust. "I⊠fuck, baby, I donât know if I can control it."
Your heart raced at the revelation. A rut. It made sense now. His heightened libido, his intensityâit was like he was a wild animal, unable to control his instincts.
Before you could say another word, his mouth crashed into yours again, his kiss so bruising and possessive that it took your breath away. He spread your legs with his knee, lining his cock up with your entrance, already dripping with arousal.
"I need to be inside you," he growled, his voice barely human anymore. "I need to fuck you, claim you."
Your body trembled with anticipation, and you nodded, unable to resist him. "Take me, Seungcheol," you whispered, voice trembling. "Iâm yours."
That was all the permission he needed. With a low growl, he plunged into you in one swift, brutal thrust. You cried out, overwhelmed by the sudden stretch, the fullness, but Seungcheol wasnât slowing down. His hips snapped against yours, his thrusts hard and fast, each one making you gasp for air.
"Fuck, you feel so good," he groaned, his voice a rasp. "So fucking tight. You always take me so well, donât you, baby?"
You whimpered in response, the pleasure building rapidly as his cock hit deep inside you, over and over. He was relentless, his hands gripping your hips tightly as he fucked you like his life depended on it. You clawed at his back, trying to ground yourself, but it was no use. His pace was brutal, and you were lost in the sensation.
"Thatâs it, baby," Seungcheol growled, his lips brushing your ear. "Let me hear you. I want to hear you scream for me."
You moaned loudly as his words sent a jolt of heat through your body. He was going so deep, hitting places inside you that made your vision blur. You had never seen him like this beforeâso wild, so uncontrollable. It was intoxicating.
"Cheol, fuck⊠so deep," you gasped, your hands gripping the sheets as he drove into you mercilessly.
He chuckled darkly, his breath hot against your skin. "You love it, donât you? You love when I fuck you like this. Youâre so fucking wet for me."
You couldnât deny it. The primal need in his voice, the way his body dominated yoursâit drove you wild. "Yes, Seungcheol⊠I love it. I love the way you fuck me," you moaned, your words spurring him on.
His pace quickened, his hips slamming against yours harder, faster. You could feel the pressure building, the orgasm creeping up on you with every brutal thrust. Seungcheolâs growls filled the room, his cock stretching you so perfectly, so deliciously.
"Iâm going to fill you up, baby," he growled against your neck, his teeth grazing your skin. "Iâm going to fuck my cum so deep inside you, make you mine."
The thought sent you over the edge. Your body tightened around him as you came with a loud cry, your orgasm washing over you in waves. Seungcheolâs grip on your hips tightened, his thrusts becoming erratic as he chased his release.
"Fuck, baby," he groaned, his voice hoarse as he slammed into you one last time, spilling himself deep inside you with a guttural moan. His body shuddered above you as he came, filling you up with his thick, hot cum.
For a moment, the two of you lay there, panting, his body still pressed against yours, his cock still buried deep inside you. But even as you tried to catch your breath, Seungcheol wasnât done. His cock was still hard, still throbbing inside you.
"Iâm not finished," he growled, his voice still thick with lust. "My rut⊠itâs not over yet."
Your eyes widened in surprise. You had expected him to be spent, but it seemed his rut was far from done. You could feel his cock twitching inside you, already eager for more.
"SeungcheolâŠ" you started, but he silenced you with another kiss, his tongue plunging into your mouth as he began to move again, slow but steady, his cock dragging along your sensitive walls.
"Three days," he murmured against your lips, his hands caressing your thighs. "Itâs going to last for three days, baby. Can you handle that?"
The thought of being fucked like this for three days sent a shiver down your spine. But the way Seungcheol looked at you, his eyes filled with need and hungerâit made you want to give him everything.
"I can handle it," you whispered breathlessly, your body already heating up again.
Seungcheol grinned, his wolfish teeth showing as he leaned down to kiss you again, his hips picking up speed. "Good," he growled. "Because Iâm not stopping until my rut is over."
And he didnât stop.
For the next three days, Seungcheol fucked you like an animal in heat. Day and night, he took you in every position imaginable, his stamina seemingly endless. You barely had time to recover from one orgasm before he was thrusting into you again, his cock always hard, always ready. His words were filthy, his dirty talk sending you spiralling every time.
"Look at you," he growled one night, his hips snapping against yours as he fucked you from behind, his hands gripping your ass tightly. "Youâre so fucking perfect. Taking me so well, like you were made for me."
You whimpered, your body trembling with pleasure as he pounded into you, his cock hitting deep. "I am, Seungcheol," you moaned, your voice barely above a whisper. "Iâm made for you."
He groaned at your words, his thrusts becoming even more forceful. "Thatâs right," he growled. "Youâre mine. All mine."
By the end of his rut, you were exhausted, your body sore but thoroughly satisfied. Seungcheol lay beside you, his arm draped possessively over your waist, his body finally calm.
"You did so good," he murmured, his voice soft and affectionate now that the storm had passed. "I love you."
You smiled, pressing a kiss to his lips. "I love you too, Seungcheol."
As intense as it had been, there was something about the way he held you afterward, the way he looked at you with such adoration, that made it all worth it. Even in the chaos of his rut, Seungcheol had been yoursâand you had been his.
#svt#seventeen#svt smut#svt x reader#seventeen smut#seungcheol#choi seungcheol#seungcheol x reader#seungcheol smut#scoups#scoups x reader#scoups smut
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đđŹđŻđ«đŠđ«đ€đ° đ©đŠđšđą đ±đ„đŠđ° | đđČđ«đ„đŹ đ” đŻđąđđĄđąđŻ
⥠Pairing: Boyfriend Yunho Ń
reader ⥠Summary: You can't blame Yunho for not being able to keep his hands to himselfâit's your fault that you're so irresistible that he's madly in love with you. Or you don't like to get up so early in the morning, but Yunho has a great way of changing that. ⥠Genre / Au / Trope: Smut, non-idol!AU, established relationships ⥠Rating: 18+ / 21+ / MDNI ⥠Word count: 2.8k ⥠Warnings: Pervert boyfriend! Yunho, sub!reader, consensual somnophilia, masturbation, free use, unprotected sex, fingering, nipple play, pet names, dirty talk, explicit sexual content, explicit language, pussy slapping, and more.
⥠net: @cultofdionysusnet @k-vanity @newworldnet ⥠A|N: For bunnies who, like me, hate waking up early.
âđŹđ©đ¶ đ
đČđ«đ«đŠđąđ° đđđ€ đ©đŠđ°đ± ⣠Part I @tiny-apocalypse @captain-joongz @alicedawitchbish @woohwababes @wlv-asteria @wisejudgedragonhairdo @mingisprincesss @lavishloving @teagietots @spooo00oky @sousydive @hwapou @bunnliix @softwsan @mjyungi @fantasy2wonderland @noirsfantasy @cassies-cookies @renaholicss @luffypants @hyukssunflower @watermelon2319 @peachygiku @bunnyxoxodarling @stolasisyourparent @soranosnowbunny @certifiedmoa @sanglix @slvtiny @hopefulrascalstatesmantoad @hecateslittlewitchling @xxawl @pastellbunno @starlletsblog @seonghwasstar @hwanring @vtyb23 @pearltinyy @minjaeum @chasevixx @bomi-ja @onedumbho3 @sanglix @cursedeastern @itza-meee @pinkies-things @atinism @mxnsxngie @nenefix-on @therealcuppicake @annafeebou @sharksandminhos @@lixies-pixieboy @vampzity @yellow-foxxing @claimmeyourprincess @0rangemilk
âđŹđ©đ¶ đ
đČđ«đ«đŠđąđ° đđđ€ đ©đŠđ°đ± ⣠Part II @unholywriters @hey-syia @hrts4nohee @vnessalau @mlink64 @tessakleine @fr34k4c1dr41n @313hwa @lilyuwon @tiziamattaga @un-knew @wiaxul @siyah-staryis @seonghwasbbgirl @mingisfavgf @bunnyluvr25 @roserperfume @lose-lose07 @variety-is-the-joy-of-life @lelaleleb @bubblebisk @silverlight-h @ chloe-elise-2000 @cookiesandcreammy @mxnsxngie @ghostlovesworld @i-love-ateez @mingisprincesss @vampscan @peachygiku @vampqueen777 @miyaluvvsyou @oddracha katsukis1wife
When Yunho wakes up, it's just beginning to light up outside the window. He lets out a heavy sigh as he leans back onto the soft, fluffy pillows and covers his eyes sensitive from sleep with his hand. His teeth bite his lower lip to keep from moaning as his straining cock twitch under the silk of his pyjamas from movements he makes. Damn, it's too early for that shit, but here he is with his cock hard as a rock, all sweaty and thirsty, and all because of a dream, albeit a damn nice dream, he has to say.Â
Yunho's gaze rests on the white ceiling of your shared bedroom, the sunlight now casting golden pink shimmering pools across it. He tries to recall the details of the dream, which excited him so early in the morning and made his cock noticeably tense. He could swear that at the beginning it was all innocent, until little by little your nice date with him turned into a completely dirty and disgusting scene where he was fucking you in a public toilet. Yunho bent you over, your big, juicy tits sticking out of your dress neckline, jiggling with each powerful thrust, and he put his long, ringed fingers in your mouth to muffle your loud, sweet whimpering as he filled your tiny, tight cunt with his cock like his life depended on it.Â
Pictures of you wriggling in his arms, your thick thighs trembling as you came on his cock, coating it with your cream, and how his viscous, milky cum lavishly gushing from your used, reddened hole, which still continued to tremble even after he was completely out of you, flash before his mind's eye again.Â
His Adam's apple twitches as he swallows noisily, and Yunho can feel his silk pyjama trousers getting more uncomfortably wet by the second from how profusely his cock is leaking. It's your fault;rom it's all that damn attraction of yours and those big shining eyes begging 'fuck me' even if it's only a dream. How can he resist such temptation?Â
He sighs again and slips his thumbs under the elastic of his trousers to pull them down his thighs, wanting to solve his 'problem' by himself as soon as possible, knowing that you don't like to be woken up so early.
'So bloody early...' He curses quietly, his eyes sliding to the electronic clock on your bedside table. 'Five in the morning.'
Yunho slowly lowers his trousers until the thick, swollen head of his cock is visible over the silky fabric before he pulls his heavy, throbbing cock fully out. The cool bedroom air lightly kisses the hot length painfully, making him hiss. Yunho licks his lips before sinking his teeth into his lower lip as he runs his manicured fingernails lightly up the length of his cock. That's what you always do to him before your tongue presses against the velvety skin of his cock and licks it lazily a few times before you close your lips over the wet, flushed head and... Damn, he should stop his fantasies right now before his self-control collapses like a house of cards and he climbs on top of you to fuck you good in the mattress.Â
He doesn't want to wake you, especially as he knows you've had problems getting to sleep lately, but he finds it so hard to hold back his groans as he cups his cock in his hand and runs it up and down a few times from the base to the head. His balls are straining with sperm he wants to pour into your pretty pussy or lovely mouth. He imagines that your palm is caressing his dick or taking it down your throat and swallowing so deeply you put your face against his pubic and start choking. Oh shit, he really must stop.Â
Yunho sits up on the bed with his back against the headboard, his legs bent at the knees and spread as wide as he can so as not to disturb you. He lazily jacks himself off, his eyes gliding over your sleeping form, taking in every curve and glimpse of bare skin.Â
His tongue keeps flicking over his lips, as if Yunho can taste your pussy, which he has licked deliciously in his dreams. He's always enjoyed eating you; it loosens up his compulsive oral fixation, and lately he's become addicted to lazily licking you to ease the gnawing feeling of dissatisfaction inside him when his mouth is empty.Â
The image of him languidly sucking on your clit, occasionally rubbing his tongue over your folds, makes him pump his cock faster. His other hand slides between his thighs and encircles his balls, massaging them in his palm, which only increases his pleasure. Suddenly his gaze falls on your small mouth; he can see the tip of your soft tongue between your wet lips. Fuck, you look so vulnerable, so tender, absolutely fuckable, and this only excites him more.Â
Although Yunho has to say that he's generally turned on by absolutely everything you do, even if it's something mundane or completely innocent. Maybe he's just a total pervert; who knows?Â
To be honest, he still doesn't understand how he managed to make you his in the first place, but it doesn't matter; you're here now, living in his apartment, sleeping in his bed, fucking him every night, and more.Â
Sometimes he can't control himself at all; you make him feel so good just by being in his life; you're like a drug he can't get enough ofâall those dreams, all those thoughts, all those sweet smiles and wet, glistening looks, and of course that special look on your face he always sees when you cum for himâYunho is crazy in love with you; sue him for it.Â
Every time Yunho promises himself that he is going to do the right thingâhe is going to treat you like a real princess, he is going to kiss the ground you walk on, he is going to be gentle, he is going to be affectionateâhe can do it. Yunho is determined to make love with you for hours because he is a fantastic lover and he is so tough. You can ride him like a stallion, he can fuck you holding you in his arms or pressing you against the wall; every position is possible with him, and of course he will let you take the control, but... but it ends the same way it always does: he grabs your thighs roughly with his big and strong hands, digging his fingers into the soft flesh until it bruises and haemorrhages, and he fucks you roughly and deeply like an animal.Â
Sometimes he's so ashamed of it, but it's you; it's all because of you; it's you who do all these things to himâyou're the source of his insatiable lust.Â
But now it was a completely different case. How is he supposed to deal with it when he's so damn horny and you're consciously not available to him now?Â
Of course, it was always present in your conversations; you dropped hints here and there that 'he can have you anytime he wants', but Yunho still felt a little guilty. Hell, he seemed like a horny teenager with raging hormones who didn't know how to deal with his own arousal, but it wasn't enough to stop his free hand from squeezing your breasts and massaging them through your thin nightgown.Â
It was such a pretty thingâsheer, thin, short, trimmed with ruffles and laceâjust the way he liked it; you looked absolutely angelic in it, but at the same time utterly slutty, the contrast Yunho liked most about you.Â
Your sleepy face frowns slightly at the sudden stimulation, your nipples hardening under his touch. He unconsciously licks his lips as he sees the candy pink flesh swell as his fingers circle your nipples through the translucent fabric, his obsessive oral fixation not helping him at all with the urge to take them in his mouth and suck them until you come, and he knows you can definitely do it since Yunho has done it to you before. Once he dedicated a whole evening to sucking, licking, and biting your nipples until you squirted for him, and damn, it was so hot. The memory makes his cock twitch in his hand, new drops of pre-cum leaking from its head, running down its thick, wiry length, coating it in a glistening layer of moisture.Â
'Fuck.' Yunho moans, strangled. He's so close, so damn close, but his orgasm still doesn't come, keeping him on the edge of overwhelming pleasure. His cock aches from how rough and hard he's fucking his fist and how eager he is to get his sweet release. But all his efforts are in vain; they only irritate him more and make his cock throb with tension; he needs you and only you to make him cum.Â
He throws his head back, rolling his eyes as he runs the pad of his thumb over the head of his cock, and imagine that he's rubbing it against your princess-pussy instead, smearing his pre-cum all over your clit and making you shiver and squirm. Shit...
With a disappointed sigh, he stops touching himself and rolls over onto his side so that he's facing you. Indecisively, his hand hangs in the air before he places his big palm on your pussy. He can feel how warm and wet it is through the see-through panty, which he thinks is completely useless, but you like to look aesthetically pleasing, and who is he to argue with his princess? You squirm at his touch, unconsciously spreading your legs wider for him, and Yunho takes advantage of this to push the wet net aside and slide his fingers along your slit.Â
"Mmm, baby, you're obviously dreaming about something nice." He whispers into your cheek, showering it with light, airy kisses as his fingers circle your clit, spreading your juices all over it. You're already so wet for him. His fingers caress you persistently, tracing his name on your clit, feeling it swell under his touch. His kisses travel down your neck to your bare shoulders and deep cleavage. Yunho is trying not to bite your skin; he doesn't want you to wake up in pain, especially as the marks of his past bites still haven't completely disappeared. God, how you moaned when he sank his teeth into you as he stretched you out on his fingers. The memory is still too vivid in his mind.
Eventually the stimulation becomes too overwhelming for you to stay asleep and your eyes flutter open. For a second, you panic at the feel of a cold, calloused finger rubbing against your sensitive bundle of nerves, but Yunho's husky voice instantly calms you.
"Shh, princess, it's only me." He kisses your lips gently, and you moan into his mouth as his fingers pinch your clit. "I couldn't cum without you, so I thought I'd play with that angel pussy; you don't mind me waking you up like this, do you, baby?" He continues to kiss your face as he circles your clit before slapping it lightly with the palm of his hand. You jerk at the sharp sensation, excitement tingling on your skin, and you feel your hole tighten around nothing. It's not the kind of awakening you've been dreaming of, but you don't mind, especially when Yunho's long, skilled fingers are giving you such pleasure.Â
You couldn't stop squirming; it felt too good as he continued to rub his fingers over your delicate folds, occasionally tracing the edge of your hole and dipping his fingertips inside to collect your juices. Your hips rose in time with the movements of his hand, and you came closer and closer to orgasm when suddenly he pulled his hand away from your pussy and brought his wet fingers to your lips.Â
"Lick it for me, princess." And you do as you're told. Your tongue sticks out of your mouth, wraps around the long appendages glistening with your slime, and licks them clean. All the while, as you suck and lick Yunho's fingers, you stare into his eyes, knowing that this is what drives him crazyâhis long fingers in your mouth, the unbroken eye contact, and the way you drool for him. "Damn, angel, that's it." He slaps your pussy again with his free hand, and you roll your eyes in searing pleasure as you continue to suck his fingers diligently. "I want to see your beautiful face when you come, Princess. You'll show me, won't you?" He finally pulls his fingers out of your mouth, allowing you to speak.
'Yes, Yu-Yunho...Whatever you want."Â
A smug grin blossoms on his lips; he likes the way you react to him too much. Yunho feels his cock throbbing painfully again, more pre-cum leaking from the head of his cock and smearing down his thigh, but it doesn't matter; all he can think about is how you're going to come on his fingers.Â
Your vision becomes blurry; you can't even describe what's happening; your brain is still too foggy from sleep; you just lie there and take whatever Yunho gives you and let your handsome boyfriend play with you as he pleases.Â
"I'm going to make you feel so good, Princess." You cling to his wrist, trying to ground yourself, but it doesn't help much, especially when he inserts his two long fingers into you sharp and deep, making you let out a shrill moan.Â
It's always like this with Yunho; at first he's gentle, his touches airy and calculated, but the longer your games go on, the rougher and sharper he gets. It can start with him worshipping your pussy with his mouth and end with him roasting you in the butt with his huge cock, getting you on all fours, and putting all his weight on you.Â
"I'll buy you new ones." That's the only warning you get before the sound of ripping fabric fills the room, or rather the sound of your panties rippingâthey're the fifth he's ripped this week. For a moment he cups your entire pussy in his possessive palm, feeling how wet and ready it is for him, promising himself that he will fuck you with his tongue later, after you have come on his fingers and maybe after you give him a delicious blowjob. You always drove him crazy with the way you sucked him off. Your mouth was always so hot and wet, and as a bonus, you swallowed him all the way to the base and let Yunho fuck your sweet face.
Yes, that was a great plan for the morning.Â
"The most beautiful pussy belongs to my sweet girl, doesn't it?" His fingers enter you again and begin to move quickly in and out of you. You could only nod in response to his words, too absorbed in the sensation of your growing orgasm. Your back arched over the bed, your hips trembling as his fingers flexed inside you, hitting your sweetest, most sensitive spot each time.Â
"I'm going to cum! Shit... Yunho!' You moaned his name like a mantra, feeling the tight, hot knot of pure ecstasy unravel inside you, plunging you headfirst into the depths of pleasure. Your moans and cries were like music to his ears and only spurred him on.Â
Yunho focusses his attention on your clit again, increasing the sensations of your orgasm even more. You almost lose touch with reality as he looks at you with a smile, not stopping the movement of his fingers on your clit for a second, his sweaty forehead pressed against yours.Â
"That's it, good girl." His honeyed voice is sticky against your heated skin as Yunho leaves smudged kisses on your cheeks. 'That's my princess. You'd do the same for me, wouldn't you?' He asks almost innocently, taking your hand in his and pressing it against his needy cock. It's hot under your palm, wet and sticky with pre-cum, thick veins swollen and throbbing under the velvety skin. "Come on, angel, help me, and then I'll make you cum again. You can ride my face, or I can eat you up against the wall. Remember the time I held you on my shoulders while you smothered me with your sweet cunt, hmm?" Yunho coaxes you and begins to push his cock into your hand. You reflexively squeeze it with your palm, your thumb running over the sensitive spot under the head.Â
"Fuck, yeah... Just like that."
It may not have been the wake-up call you dreamed of on a Saturday morning, but you weren't the type to complain, especially when your boyfriend is Jeong Yunho.Â
#kvanity#cultofdionysusnet#ateez smut#kpop smut#ateez x reader#ateez imagines#ateez fanfic#atz smut#smut#seonghwa smut#hongjoong smut#san smut#yunho smut#mingi smut#jongho smut#wooyoung smut#yeosang smut#seonghwa x reader#hongjoong x reader#mingi x reader#san x reader#wooyoung x reader#yunho x reader#yeosang x reader#ateez unholy hours#park seonghwa smut#ateez fanfiction#ateez scenarios#ateez hard thoughts#hot'short
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Insufficient | Azriel x Reader
Summary: After a few months of dating, your relationship begins to crack, and the truth behind Azrielâs odd behavior comes out.
Word Count: ~ 1.8k
Warnings: ANGST, so much angst, sort of unrequited feelings, breakup, mentions of sex + torture and murder, Nesta being an absolute queen
A/N: enjoy some delicious azzy angstđ lmk what you think I should do for the next part, like should they get back together, or reader finds a new mans while az grovels??
Requests are open!
Masterlist | Next
It had been a warm, sunny day when youâd first met him.
The bakery had been going steadily as ever in Velaris, your family-owned shop hard at work to make the citizen's pastries and your famous sourdough bread. Generations of the family had owned it beforehand, and you were still helping out, you had been working the front that day.
Azriel had walked in, asking for some sort of treat that his High Lady was craving. His description of it hadnât been the best, leading to almost thirty minutes of you showing him different sweet treats and pastries until he finally found what he wanted, and ordered a dozen of them.
That had been the beginning of your situationship, where heâd come to the shop asking for various things once every now and then, only to subtly get closer to you and even slightly flirt.
Eventually, he asked you out to dinner, and after a few more, you two began dating, and he admitted that he felt a little spark when he first saw you. Looking back, you wondered if that was the only reason he even pursued you in the first place, not for your personality, or even your looks, but just because of that spark.
The first few weeks had been lovely, him being thoughtful and caring to you in the little acts. Such as the way he made coffee for you just how you liked it in the mornings, how he began to put things lower on shelves so you could reach them, how he would talk quietly when you had migraines, or be patient when you were in a mood. The best example probably being the first time you had your period in front of him.
He hadnât acted disgusted by it, instead, heâd gently cared for you, helping you through it, buying you chocolate and all the foods and snacks you were craving, getting heating pads, making sure you were alright for the entire insufferable week.
However, after that, the honeymoon period mustâve worn off, because he seemed constantly tense or stressed after that. His face remained like stone, not budging or cracking, even for you. The softening of his eyes that had happened before it was replaced by something strained as if he was waiting impatiently for something.
Even in bed, he wouldnât look at you, remained quiet as a mouse, the only sign that he was enjoying himself being a large exhale as he buried his face in your neck or turned away. That was another problem, he knew how to fuck, he knew how to do that very well, but he didnât know how to make love. Any time you tried to teach him, he just didnât accept it, simply giving an unsatisfactory hum in response and continuing what he was doing.
Heâd come home from missions, drenched in sweat and sometimes even blood, and not say anything even when you cleaned him off and led him to bed, giving you a cold shoulder. You fully understood that he had a bloody past and history, but you at least expected him to open up a little bit to you. Without any emotional transparency, it wasnât really a relationship, was it?
His family was nice, though. You liked them, especially Nesta, since she seemed not to put up with everyone elseâs bullshit. She was the only one you opened up to about your issues with Azriel, and how you were thinking of breaking things off or taking a break.
âHeâs a hard one, but it sounds like heâs being an ass. If it were me, I wouldnât put up with that.â
She said while you both sat in the library, neither of you noticing the small shadows lurking near the books. You sighed, nodding slowly.
âI know, itâs justâŠI feel like heâs waiting for something else, like just me isnât enough.â
You said with a frown, and Nesta gave a little hum of acknowledgment.
âJust give it a week or two, and if youâre still unhappy, Iâd leave.â
She said with a shrug, and not long after the both of you went your separate ways. You followed Nestaâs advice, giving the relationship a week or two, and it remained stressed and tense. However, when you finally managed to get into Azrielâs office during the day, about to break things off, he spoke first.
âLet me guess, your testing weeks werenât satisfactory?â
He asked in a sharp tone, eyes narrowed on you with a piercing gaze. You took a sharp breath in, glaring at him despite the embarrassment that tried to take over.
âYou were spying on me.â
You said, trying to keep your tone even despite how it wavered slightly. He stood then, towering over you from his superior height.
âI donât like when people talk about me behind my back, let alone my partner.â
He said, the words clipped and full of anger simmering under the surface. He took a step closer, and you took a step back. Youâd never been afraid of him, not really, but at this moment you didnât exactly want to be close to him. His keen eyes noticed, and something like hurt and anger flashed in them.
âDonât act like Iâm some terrible person for having a girl talk because youâve been acting weird. I canât believe you spied on me.â
He huffed, taking another step closer, the shadows swirling and writhing, looking more agitated than ever. You took another step back, only to run straight into a wall that was now behind you. He continued stalking closer until your heart was beating faster and faster until he leaned down so you were eye-to-eye.
âIâm sorry Iâm not what you signed up for. Iâm not gentle or loving, I am a spymaster, I torture and kill people for my work, and have for centuries. I wonât be forced to change just to fit what you think I should be, or what you want in a relationship.â
He hissed, his words now full of anger and frustration. You leaned back, trying to keep away.
âThatâs your problem. You donât know how to separate your work life from your personal life, and youâre taking it out on me. You can be gentle and loving, Iâve seen it before, but Iâm not what you want. Youâve been acting like I need to be something more for you when Iâm not. I donât know what you want, but your inability to communicate and be transparent isnât my problem.â
You said back, tears now welling up as you tried to push him away. He didnât back up, only moving closer and pushing you into the wall. His temper was building, and you could tell. It was only a matter of time until he wouldâŠ.
âA mate! I wanted a mate!â
Snap.
The silence stretched on and on for what seemed like hours after he said that, yelling it in your face. Youâd never heard him raise his voice before. You gaped at the sight of him unwinding and shattering right in front of you as he rambled on.
âItâs not fair, Rhys gets Feyre, Cassian gets Nesta, Lucien gets Elain even if she doesnât want him, and who do I get? No one.â
He said in an almost panicked tone, rambling on and on. He pushed off the wall, pacing around in his office, hands fidgeting.
âI thoughtâwhen I felt that spark when I went in your shop, that it might be you, but you werenât enough. You arenât my mate, because it wouldâve snapped by now, I wouldâve felt it, but I didnât. You arenât enough for me, and you never will be.â
He said, finally sighing at the end. He wouldnât even look at you, eyes unfocused and only looking randomly around the room, anywhere but towards you. You swallowed, trying to hold back the tears that welled up because of his words. You werenât enough. You never would be.
He looked like he felt a bit bad for half a second before his expression hardened again into that unflinching steel youâd grown to hate. He finally looked at you again, no hint of empathy or guilt now in his gaze for leading you on, or practically torturing you these past months.
Taking a shaky breath, you finally choked words out.
âOh,â You murmured, trying to swallow the lump in your throat.
âOkay.â
You whispered, managing to push off the wall to walk to the door, opening it and walking down the hall, to the room you two had shared, and you began packing your belongings. Picture frames of your family, your clothes, little trinkets, toiletries, you left no trace of you behind as you packed it in a large duffel bag in the closet.
You walked to the front door of the House, open the door, and walk out, the 10,000 steps down looming in front of you. Azriel didnât offer to fly you down, and it was only when you turned to look back at him, his face stone cold, that you felt it.
The snap.
A shifting warmth and coldness all at once.
And a mating bond.
His face fell in what looked like pure devastation and realization, hazel eyes wide and lips parted. It mightâve been the most emotion youâd seen him show in weeks. He began to walk out, trying to go after you as you began taking the steps, but a large flap and wave of wind stopped him.
Cassianâs large, hulking form stopped him, shaking his head grimly as he walked towards you, where you were still going down the steps, and he laid a hand on your shoulder.
âIâll fly you.â
He said simply, and you nodded with a sniffle as he picked you up, his wings carried him into the air as he soared up, only to land moments later and drop you off back at the bakery where your family was working. He set you on the ground, pulling you into a warm hug.
âIâm sorry,â
He said, letting you pull away, and for some reason, you believed him. You, Cassian, and Nesta made quite the dynamic trio, and you would probably miss them the most. They were some of your closest friends, and also wonderful drinking buddies. You and Nesta loved cheating in card games and beating Cassian when he was too drunk to notice until he owed either of you a fortune.
âYou can always come visit me and Nes, just send a letter or somethinâ.â
He murmured to you, wiping the tears from your cheek, and giving you an apologetic grin, before sending you off inside your familyâs bakery and flying off.
This time, when you saw the shadow still curled around your wrist like it always had been when you and Azriel were dating, you smacked it off, sticking your hand right into a clear ray of sunshine to chase it off.
You were done being dragged down by shadows and darkness, and for once in your miserable life, you were going to look for the light instead.
#acotar fanfiction#writers on tumblr#acotar fandom#acotar x reader#acotar fluff#azriel#azriel acotar#azriel x reader#azriel angst#angst#acotar angst#acotar#a court of thorns and roses#a court of silver flames#nesta supremacy#nesta archeron#nesta x cassian#nessian
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Like An Animal - T.F.
Synopsis. Of course Toji doesnât want any more kids. Of course heâs lying as he stuffs your pretty cĂșnt full of his cĂșm for the third time tonight.
Pairing. Toji Fushiguro x Reader
Content. MDNI, fem! reader, established relationship, unprotected, cĂșmplay, mating press, chĂłking, overstim, oral (female receiving), crĂ©ampie, dirty talk, Toji really REALLY wants to get you pregnant, spitting, mentioned kids, absolutely filthy, pet names, swearing.
Word count. 4.5k
A/N. Need this man so bad you donât even understand AAA.
Toji Fushiguro didnât want any more kids. Why would he? They were messy, expensive, and it was a sheer miracle that Megumi wasnât anything like the little demons heâs seen during drop-off at the kindergarten. He didnât need another reason to watch Babyshark for five hours straight - and he wasnât about to change his mind anytime soon.Â
Or, so he thought.
âHey doll, mâhome- what the f-â
âToji! Language!â you hiss, hastily covering the ears of a very oblivious Yuji, who was deeply engrossed in mixing icing.Â
Oh?Â
Now, there have only been three times in his life that Toji has been truly taken aback. The first being when he discovered that yes, Megumiâs hair really does stand up that way naturally. Second, when he realized that he was falling for you - and that oh shit maybe he does still have feelings somewhere in there after all.Â
And finally, right now, the sight of you covered in flour and wrestling three giggly toddlers into some semblance of order in the kitchen. âWelcome home, handsome.â
Oh.Â
It made something deep inside him lurch so strangely.
âWhyâŠâ Toji rasps, eyes flitting between the mixing bowls messily clinked together and the three toddlers happily stood on stools, flour in their hair and matching smiles on your faces. âWhy have they multiplied?âÂ
âWeâre baking cookies!â Yuji exclaims from the counter, swiping a thick wad of dough on Nobaraâs hair. To which the latter responds with a swift smack on the head.Â
You smirk at your dumbfounded boyfriend, âWell, Toji, it seems that when you leave me alone with a batch of cookies to bake, I have a tendency to summon reinforcements.â Gesturing at the chaos surrounding you, âMegs wanted to bake some cookies before his sleepover at Yujiâs so I had these three over because we have more than enough space.â
âI seeâŠdoes insurance cover this kitchen?â
Rolling your eyes, âOh câmon, donât be such a spoilsport.â You reach for the batch of freshly baked goods, âYouâre just in time to taste-test our latest creation!â
And, well, how could he ever say no to you? Although - flour-dusted and disheveled - some strange part of himself thinks you look even more gorgeous than usual right now, as if that was even possible. His girl was so pretty, even when youâre wrangling three little gremlins. Too pretty. Toji just couldnât get his head around that nagging little voice saying you looked so pretty especially when youâre wrangling three little gre-
âEhh? Fushiguro is your dad blushing?â
âGross.â
âYou idiots he isnât blushing, itâs called âswooningâ. My mommy says itâs a grown-up thing.â
It was hard to not hear the (extremely loud) whispers from behind you, but it was even harder to ignore the slight red tinting Tojiâs ears as he pointedly reached out for the tray you were holding. Fingers barely even brushing against the cookies before a tiny voice speaks up, âMama, can I have one too?â
You freeze. Toji freezes. You think the whole world freezes except for Yuji and Nobara who stifle giggles behind their hands.
âLook Kugisaki, now heâs really swooning.â
âYeah, my mommy says thatâs also how you get babies. You swoon and pop! they appear.â
Toji raises a brow at Nobara, gritting out a strained, âYour mommy says a lot, huh?â That jolts you out of your reverie, and you flash a gentle smile at a very red-faced Megumi. Leaning down to reply, âOf course, sweetie.â
And as he mumbles a quick âThank youâ, hastily grabbing another cookie and retreating to a corner of the kitchen - hoping to disappear into the shadows - you risk a glance at Toji. Cheeks flushed hard enough to rival Megumiâs, ah, like father like son.Â
âAnyway, donât just stand there. Come help me nâ the kids, Yujiâs grandpaâs coming to pick them up soon!â you playfully swat at your boyfriendâs sculpted chest, going back to busying yourself with the icing.Â
Toji, however, was having an epiphany that was altering his perception of reality, one that heâd probably been denying ever since he stepped in through that damn front door. You. The kids. You and the kids. You and his kids.Â
âMama.â
And Megumiâs little slip-up had been the final nail on his coffin to certify that oh Toji Fushiguro was utterly and irrevocably screwed. And heâd like to blame it all on you being such a goddamn wonder, but heâs got a nagging feeling that the three little gremlins currently decorating cookies share an equal part of the blame.Â
What was it that girl had said? Swooning is how you get babies? Because, well, eyeing the way you scooped up a pouty Megumi in your arms, chatting animatedly with a tittering Nobara and Yuji, only one thought rings through his mind - damn right, kid.
---
â-and make sure to brush your teeth. No faking this time, okay? Iâve told Yujiâs grandpa to check. And-â
âNo summoning demons, and no summoning the police. Though youâre probably too young for that.â Toji interrupts your little tirade, ruffling the hair of a very disgruntled Megumi. âHave fun, little man.â
You giggle at the usual father-son dynamic, but as you waved off Megumi and his friends, you couldnât shake off the feeling that something in the air felt a bit different. Something a bit tense. A bit exciting.
Maybe it was the heavy silence that hung in the room after that door slammed shut, leaving just you and Toji all alone in the house. Forcing you to register the heat of his large frame looming behind yours. When did he get so close? Or maybe it was the prickly of his gaze on your back, a resounding slam! echoing in your ears as he cages you against the door.Â
Or maybe - just maybe - it was the way he leaned down to whisper in your ear, husky and tinged with something so utterly dangerous.Â
âSoâŠmama, huh?âÂ
A thrill goes down your spine at his words. âOh, stop.â you wave off, though you feel your cheeks flaring up in response. Especially as he plows on, âWhy? I think you make a great mama.â
You scoff, casting a sidelong glance at the muscular arm just inches away from your head. âDonât joke, Megs was so embarrassed after that.â
âIâm not joking.â
Your back hits the cool door before you can react. Tojiâs hands almost painful on your shoulders, muscles rippling as he turns you to face him. You raise your eyes to meet his and oh-
Oh shit.Â
Whatever retort on the tip of your tongue dies as you take in the man before you. His expression darkened, breaths slightly labored, eyes half-lidded and locked on you. Youâd almost have been worried at the sudden flip of personality had it not been for the words that spill from his lips.Â
âIâm not joking.â he repeats, voice strangled.Â
Great, the man has finally lost it. Despite the traitorous throbbing in your cunt, you try to make sense of the situation. âToji, this joke has-â
Your words get caught in your throat as he raises a hand to squish your cheeks together into an almost-embarrassing pout, looking down at you through dazed eyes. âDo I look like Iâm joking, doll?â Leaning down to lick a stripe up a smudge of icing on your cheek. Lingering far too long, murmuring into your skin, âWhat do you think?âÂ
In the heat of it all, you manage to choke out, âW-what?â
âDonât you think,â he mutters, as strained as if he were about to snap any second. Losing his sanity with each word that comes out of his mouth. âThat youâd make the best mama?â
âI mean- yes-â
And then his lips are on yours, shutting you up - bruising. Such a sloppy mix of teeth and spit as he drinks you in with an aching desperation. Toji breathes in your gasp as you feel his cock, hard and throbbing against your front.Â
âFuck.â he hisses into your mouth. âNot enough, ma. Need you sâbad.â
The buttons hit the floor before you realize whatâs happening. Tojiâs fisting your shirt in one hand, too impatient - too starved - he pulls down, down, down. Ripping. Urgently moving down to your shorts- âThose are expensi-â you yelp.Â
But itâs useless - the tattered fabric hits the ground faster than your jaw as he groans out a quick, âIâll buy ya a new one when we shop for baby clothes.â
Pressing hot, open-mouthed kisses down your neck, hands trailing up your thighs. He swiftly unclasps your bra, mouth dropping into a soft little oh! at the sight, immediately groping each and every inch of skin he could reach. Tweaking and rolling your swollen nipples on his fingers in wonder. âOh, doll. These are gonna be sâfull, huh? Wanâ taste how sweet youâll be.â
âT-Toji hah-â you whine, as he takes one nipple in his mouth. Lips wrapped so prettily around your tit as he tugs lightly, sucking harshly like he was miraculously trying to draw milk out. Looking up at you so obscenely through his thick lashes. âNgh- wanâ more.â you buck your hips, grinding against his thick cock.Â
And, well, how could Toji ever deny the mother of his children?
Because he immediately drops to his knees, biting down on the thin fabric of your soaked panties. Tugging with his teeth, âThis what you want, ma?â he slurs. Eyes rolling to the back of his head as he breathes in the scent of your dripping pussy, âWanâ me to eat out your pretty lilâ cunt? Jusâ say the word.â
âPlease, daddy.â
âThaâs my girl.â
And then heâs pulling - tearing your drenched panties to shreds with his teeth. Flashing you a devilish grin at the sinful strings of slick that connect you to the flimsy fabric. Oh Toji had half the mind to tease you about how wet you were already, but no, he had no time to waste.
With a guttural, fucked-out little grunt, heâs surging forward, diving face first into your pretty pussy. Nose pressing against your throbbing clit, licking a long, languid stripe up your swollen folds.Â
âOh hngh- please.â you mewl, as he buries himself deeper into your dripping cunt. Tongue bullying its way past your folds to lap at your slick, not stopping till heâs had his fill of your sweet juices. âM-more.â
Two large hands dip into your waist as he wraps his glossy lips around your pulsing clit to suck harshly, both keeping you still and supporting your weight as your knees weaken. Toji canât have his pretty girl hurt herself right before he fills her up nâ gets her pregnant, right?
âSure ya can handle more, ma?â Electricity runs up your spine as your boyfriend rolls his tongue across your clit just the way he knew you liked. âYâshould be thanking me for not jusâ stuffing you full of my cock like I want to right now.âÂ
âThen hah- why donât you?â
Toji pulls away ever-so-slightly, relishing in the delirious little whine of disappointment that leaves you. One that quickly turns into a surprised squeal as he spit a steady stream of spit into your quivering cunt, spreading it across your pussy with his thumb.
Sloppy - it was so fucking sloppy. He looked at you like you were his favorite meal and ate you out just as much.Â
Your juices decorating his lips like a badge of honor. Smearing across the bottom half of his face and trickling down his jaw. One which moves as he utters, âCanât break the mother of my kids, doll.âÂ
But oh how youâd beg to differ as he brings his face to your sloppy pussy once more, tongue darting out to catch the obscene little drip! drip! drip! of your slick. âGonâ be the best fucking dad to all three of âem.â
âT-three?â
And with that, heâs squeezing his soft tongue into your tight pussy. Throwing your left leg over his sculpted shoulder to make out deeper with your cunt. You tug on his hair pathetically, impatiently. Cute little whines of his name leaving you each time he drips into your sloppy pussy, stretching you out, swiping at your clit, thrusting in and out of your sloppy hole. Over and over-
âYeah, three.â he mutters into your folds, âGonâ give me two more beautiful babies? Gonâ be so round nâ pretty with my kids?â Tongue curling deftly against that one spot he knew would have you keening and rocking your pretty cunt into his mouth.Â
âAh- fuck fuck fuck- hngh- yes!â you moan, body jerking violently at the way he hit that spot over and over. Â
He huffs out a laugh, hungry gaze taking in that cute, desperate expression on your face. Toji just couldnât help but tease you a little bit. âUse your words, ma.â
âH-huh?â
âTell me what you want.â
You gasp out a pathetic little sob, âWant to so badly. Wanâ you to hah- fill me up hngh- W-wanâ cum-â
âSo demanding.â he titters teasingly into your cunt, vibrations making you drag your pussy more erratically on his mean mouth. Now, Toji could tease you with his tongue for hours until youâre crying and begging for his cock. But right now, he doesnât think he has any more patience nor sanity. âI love that.â
Toji knows by the way your pretty pussy clenches around his tongue that youâre close, pulse urgent on his face as he greedily laps at your cunt. So he speeds up his movements, drinking you in like a madman.Â
A hand snaking up to plunge knuckle-deep into your sloppy entrance. Pussy taking him so readily after being stretched out on his tongue. Your adorable, fucked-out little whines of his name going straight to his rock-hard dick as he fucks you with his fingers the way he wants to with his cock. Two fingers thrusting in and out while his thumb draws rapid little circles on your clit. Sinking his teeth gently into your swollen folds.
Bucking into his touch, âHah! Sâtoo much, daddy. Hngh, g-gonna cum ah! Gonna cum-â
âThen cum, doll.â
And you are - fast and violent.Â
Plushy walls clamping down on Tojiâs fingers as if your fluttering cunt was trying to suck him up. Mind hazy and your only thoughts being about Toji and his tongue and Toji-
âMmm taste sâsweet, love you on mâtongue.â he grunts, breathing you in and letting your juices slide down his throat. Lewd squelches in time with your cute lilâ whines as you ride out your orgasm on his pretty face. Tongue fucking you through your high.Â
âHad fun, ma?â Toji grins once you blink back your vision, chest heaving as you try to catch your breath. Dangerous little smile only growing at your barely-lucid nod.Â
Ah, but even the ever-confident Toji Fushiguro faltered as your shaky hands reached out to pet his achingly hard cock. Swollen and leaking a mouthwatering dark patch against his trousers.Â
âWanâ your cock now, daddy.â you murmur, watching the way his darkened eyes widen ever-so-slightly, breath hitching. âWanâ you to fill me up over nâ over like you promised.â
Oh you little minx, with all your dirty tricks - you were going to be the death of him.Â
With a dark little chuckle of disbelief, Toji rises to his full height. Lips capturing yours in a bruising kiss - tongue licking at the seam of your mouth and intertwining with yours. Forcing you to taste yourself on him. So sweet of sin and all his dreams of stuffing you till you were sure to have his kids - two of them, in fact.Â
âAnything yâwant, doll.â he whispers into your lips.Â
And thatâs all that is said before the clinking of a belt rings in the heady air. The realization that you were so naked and splayed out for him while he was still unfairly clothed finally hitting as Toji peels his shirt off. Your mouth waters at the chiseled front, hands immediately reaching to squeeze his large pecs. Running your hands along his body.Â
âAh, fuck.â he shudders, âYânever change, huh?âÂ
Yet your greedy hands are momentarily stunned as he lets his pants fall to the floor with his boxers. Rock-hard cock springing up and hitting his stomach.Â
He was so painfully hard that it made your cunt quiver in anticipation. Red and throbbing, soaked in precum and glistening in the dim lighting. Twitching at the sound of your voice as you say âWant you to fucking ruin me, daddy.â you blink up at Toji, all doe-eyed and teary after your last orgasm.Â
And oh does that make him snap - maybe his sanity, maybe you by the end of this, because before you know it, Tojiâs spreading your legs with his knee. Biting his bottom lip as your slick trails down your pretty cunt and onto your legs.Â
âWhat mâgirl wants.â he grits out, dragging his weeping tip across your swollen folds. Collecting your sweet juices on his head. âMy girl- gets.â
You keen as Toji bullies his massive cock into your cunt on the last word. âNgh- T-Toji.â you whine, vision flashing at the stretch. No matter how many times Toji stuffed you full of his cock - his size never failed to disappoint.
âShhh, itâs okay. You can take it.â Trying to steady your breathing as he fucks into you in quick, mindless little jabs to fit himself inside your snug pussy. âIâll make sure of it, doll. How else mâgonna breed your pretty lilâ cunt?â
Your dripping cunt rubs so deliciously against his abs, slick mixing with his precum and smearing across both your bodies. Filthy, and exactly what you wanted right now.Â
âShit, love when your pussyâs so messy. Now, legs.â he rasps, with a quick smack to your thighs. And thatâs all that has to be said - your queue to wrap your legs around Tojiâs waist, letting his strong arms lift you with ease. Splitting you apart deeper and deeper onto his cock, veins rubbing so deliciously against all the right spots. A maddening little bump! bump! bump! matching your heartbeat.Â
âAh! Hngh- Fuck fuck fuck, mâso full.â you keen, heels digging into his hips.Â
Sliding down his cock far enough that his heavy balls meet your ass, already so wet with precum and slick. Ah, you were so full of him you almost felt like he was pushing against your lungs.
âOh, yes.â Toji hisses, throwing his head back. âFucking finally.â Finally he gets what heâs been aching for ever since those three gremlins stepped out the door. All the blood draining to his cock at the idea of fucking his cum into you till you couldnât walk. Till you were so full of him that he was the only one you could think of. Hey, he needed to get some attention before the baby arrives, right?
âNeed this sâbad. Fuck.â he gasps. Still pushing inside you despite bottoming out, shallow, desperate little grinds of his hips. âGonna fuck a baby into you, you little slut. Fill you up with my seed till you canât take it anymore.â
Neat little crescents of his fingernails on your ass as his thrusts get longer, more purposeful. Twitching balls smacking against your skin in such a lewd rhythm, matching the cute little ah! ah! ah! leaving your mouth each time his fat head hits your cervix. So deliciously painful.Â
âCâmon, ma.â Toji moans, hips out of control now. Taking in the way your head was thrown back, body bouncing each time he rammed his cock into your tight cunt. But oh how he wanted to see the fucked-out expression on your face. âLook at me.â
So cockdrunk and delirious, you barely register the way Toji cradles your head to press his sweaty forehead against yours. Only looking up at him with delirious heart-eyes as he milked himself on your sloppy pussy.Â
âShit feel sâperfect split-apart on my cock. Really made for me, huh?â he gasps into your mouth. âNeed to cum in this pretty pussy. Need to fill you up- ah- need this need this- fuck.â
âShit shit shit, Toji mâso close. Iâm hngh-â
A hand hurriedly unwraps from your waist to draw rapid, desperate little patterns on your cunt. Not even circles anymore because shit Toji couldnât think of anything aside from the way your pussy was milking him so good- And how he was gonna fuck a baby into you and Megumi was gonna be the best big brother and-
â-youâll bake with âem. And Iâll tuck âem to bed.â the words tumble out of his lips and into your parted mouth. Pussy drunk and babbling, âNâ weâre both taking those three to the park and try not to lose âem.â
Dragging himself inside you till his weeping tip kisses your sloppy hole. Fingers on your clit becoming more and more frantic. Fucking you so filthy, each word punctuated by quick, harsh thrusts, âThen at night mâgonna steal you all to myself, and yâknow what, ma?â
At this point you can do nothing more than just take it as Toji bounces you on his cock in midair, sobbing out a strained, âW-what, daddy?â
Toji leans impossibly closer, thumb catching on your swollen lips, breath fanning your face as he mutters, âGonna fuck another baby into you. Fill you with my cum all over again, doll. Give it all to you.â
Now, youâve heard of orgasms that come out of nowhere and have you seeing stars. And this was no different - yet you see the pearly gates of heaven as you cream around his cock. âAh! Hngh mâcumming mâcumming oh-â
He lets out a guttural groan as your nails rake his back, hips stuttering and sloppy now. Breathing out raggedly, âYeah fuck jusâ like that use me likeâ that- hngh squeezing me sâtight gonna cum. Gonna give my pretty baby my cum, fuck a baby into ya- oh-â
Body bowing into yours, teething latching onto the crook of your neck, biting down right over your pulse. Fingers digging and bruising on your hips, holding your filthy pussy to his cock as he cums with a strangled moan. Hard. almost painfully so.Â
White-hot pleasure behind his eyes, pumping thick, hot ropes to fill your snug cunt. Just animalistic movements from such a carnal part of himself as he fucked his seed deeper and deeper into you.Â
Not even thinking of stopping even as you keen at your poor overfilled pussy. Tojiâs cum dripping down your legs and onto his quivering balls as he fucks you like an animal. Over and over and-
âHey, who said weâre done, doll?â Toji tuts mockingly, snapping you out of the haze. âDonât pass out on me just yet.â
And you donât even realize it before heâs manhandling you onto the nearby couch. Pulling out only admire his seed gushing out of you, so white and hot and his. Cock twitching to life at the pool of cum and slick slowly forming on the cushion below. Fuck that, youâll need a bigger couch for five people anyway. Â
Ramming his throbbing cock into your poor, swollen pussy. Throwing your legs over his sculpted shoulders and bending down down down till your knees were at your tits.Â
Not even bothering to let you adjust this time before heâs fucking you again and again and maybe he was whispering sweet nothings in your ear - probably it was just promises of how he was gonna fill your pretty lilâ cunt till Megumi gets home. Promises he fully intended to fulfill.Â
âFuck. One more. G-gotta make sure it takes, ma.â he swears into your mouth. Voice jagged, and you almost couldnât recognize it as your boyfriendâs. Barely even lucid, just mindless motions of his hips as he watched your slutty cunt suck him up so good. âYeah, whoâs cum is that, doll? Whoâs that painting your pretty pussy white?â
Drinking in the sobbed out little, âY-you, Toji! Ah- Hngh-â as he starts ravaging your swollen clit again. Tojiâs balls squeeze so painfully as he fucked you like his personal sextoy. And your pussy was so heavenly around him that you were basically asking for him to go harder. Begging. Begging him to ruin you.Â
âAh! Fuck Iâm-â throat shot, you canât even form a proper sentence before youâre seeing stars being your eyes. Walls milking Tojiâs thick cock as you cum - almost painfully. Mouth dropping into a fucked-out little oh! tears streaking down your face.Â
Ones that Toji canât help but lick off, salty on his tongue as he cums again. And again and again. Voice stuck in his throat, eyes widening, the veins popping out on his arms as he pulls your hips closer to his.Â
Hips burning now as he breeds you like some animal. Like he was ready to fill you up until he was shooting blanks and couldnât anymore. Cum squelching out of your sloppy pussy and seeping into where you were joined. Ah, well, the couch was ruined - time for Plan B.Â
Which is why Toji found himself wrestling you onto the cool floor, cock still twitching inside you, spreading you for him on whatever flat surface he could find. Milking his cock so he can cum more than he has his whole life.Â
Both of you barely lucid at this point. He wasnât even sure if he could cum again - but by God if he wasnât going to try. He was drunk off of the feeling inside you, so warm and wet with him. So perfect to carry his child.
âHngh- yes yes yes wanâ carry your child, daddy.â you whine. Oh shit, had he said that out loud? Ah, who gives a fuck at this point. The only thing he cared about now was the feeling of your sloppy lilâ pussy wrapped around him and whether Megumi would want a brother or a sister.Â
âHm, yeah? Like the idea huh, you little slut. Fuck sâperfect fâme- ngh-â
Running on just the sting of your nails down his back and your legs pulling him impossibly closer. Barely even thrusting at this point, just frantic shallow, grinds to milk his swollen cock. Trying to fuck out something delicious. It hurt, but it hurt so good.Â
So good that Toji doesnât even realize when heâs cumming again. Just faint little tingles before his cock is shooting thin, long wisps of cum, making you squeeze around him as he fills you up again and again.Your own orgasm just a small spike of euphoria before he starts moving inside you. Again. Â
Ah, he wonders, vision hazy at the edges - but still perfectly capturing the white gushing out of your ravaged cunt. Taking in the messy floor, and your even messier pussy. Where to next, huh? He hasnât even fucked you in the kitchen yet.
âN-next?â you repeat, eyes widening as much as they possibly could through the exhaustion and the urge to pass out. And oh he said that out loud too? Whoops.
âOf course.â he pools the cum trickling out of you on two fingers, shoving them in your mouth. Making your head spine as you choke and gag around his thick fingers, pressing the back of your tongue. Only two things ringing in your mind, Tojiâs unforgiving cock - raw and hot, dragging against your ravaged walls again and again - and the words that spill from his lips.
âBesides, we gotta practice for the fourth one, too, ma.â
A/N. Fully believe this man will fuck you till both of you pass out.Â
Plagiarism not authorized.Â
#jjk x reader#jjk smut#jjk x you#toji x reader#toji smut#toji x you#toji fushiguro x reader#toji fushiguro smut#toji fushiguro x you#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen x you#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fic#toji#toji fushiguro#tonywrites#gojo x reader#gojo smut
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an ode to mingyu's tiddies
genre; smut, mdni <3 | warnings; mingyu's tits, reader is OBSESSED with his tits, reader has existential crisis throughout the entire fic, perverted thots, a mention of magic mingyu, mentions of food, mentions of fever (she's just horny af), mentions of public indecency, dry humping, tits sucking (m. receiving), face sitting, oral (f. receiving), mingyu is a shameless thot. | a/n; here she is. fought demons writing this. hope you guys like it!
youâre obsessed. to say the least.Â
the first time you actually noticed them was quite early into the relationship. he pulled you into a bone-crushing hug, effectively smushing your face against his chest. and you honestly didnât mind dying like that, squished in between his pecs. nonetheless, something was awakened inside you that day.Â
and it doesnât really help that mingyu loves flexing his muscles. his chest is one of his best assets that he shows off. especially to you. goddamn him and his damn tight-fitting tank tops. you canât help but watch with an ajar mouth as he works out, his chest pushing out under strain. oh, how you would love to fondl- âtake a picture. it lasts longer.â he smirks at you, leaving you flustered and embarrassed. Â
mingyu also notices the way you stare, or should he say, where you stare. pride swells in his heart each time you glance at his muscles. and well, he loves the attention. so he does what he does. he flusters you every chance he gets. with his tits.
he foregoes his shirt in bed. every. single. time. the first time it happened was not long after your epiphany. you didnât pay much mind to it since it was after sex. but then, it became a routine. cuddling to sleep meant having his tits pushed up against your face or back. and, in some cases, you get to fondle them as you spoon him.Â
and you know what? scratch that. heâs entirely shirtless around you. all the time. might as well get naked and start living in nature at this point. and well, who are you to reject adam in the form of your boyfriend, mingyu?Â
christâs sake. the things that he makes you think and do.Â
the very rare times that you are not bombarded with magic mingyu would be when youâre both outside. being his girlfriend also means being his workout buddy. it also means fighting demons that whisper the filthiest things about him to you as you help him with his workout. well, the demon might just be your brain.Â
you keepâtry to keep your eyes on his face, sipping from your water bottle after your workout. and he does the same, maintaining eye contact with you as he hydrates himself too. mingyu can make anything hot. even the most innocent things like eye contacts or cooking. or maybe youâre just a pervert.Â
you internally sigh, breaking the eye contact and look around the almost empty gym. itâs pretty late, and only a few night owls are in sight. but empty enough to get away with him pushing you against the mirror and fucking the lifeâthatâs enough. this man has reduced into a degenerate at this point.Â
with embarrassment in your veins, you quickly kiss his cheek, promising to use the shower quickly and reunite with him to go home. you again fight demons as you sprint to the shower area. you could just go home and shower with him. and have some more âworkoutâ too. shaking your head, you quickly take your shower.Â
âŠ
âis everything ok?â mingyu asks, concern etched onto his face. you havenât even touched the food he made, and youâve been like this since coming back from the gym. you hang your head down in shame and shake your head, shifting on the couch. heâs worrying about you, and here you are, thinking filthy things about him.Â
his big hands wrap around your wrist, pulling you closer. âshit, you have a fever?â he tilts your face up and lays the back of his hand on your forehead. the other hand lays on your waist, feeling ticklish and hot on your skin. your skin burns more at the question. oh that? no, i was just thinking about getting folded in half and being fucked by you. nothing else hahaâŠ
âno,â you manage a grunt out, feeling shy under his gaze. âwhat are you talking about? youâre burning!â he counters. you sigh, and all the escape routes close, leaving only one path open.Â
with great courage and greater embarrassment, you admit, âjust horny,âÂ
âhmm? canât hear you baby.â he leans in closer, eyes big with worry.Â
âiâm horny and i wanna fuck you.âÂ
mingyu does a double-take at your words. youâre burning up for him? youâre almost seated on his lap now, looking at him with lust-clouded eyes and parted lips, and he feels the waves of heat seeping from you. the post-workout adrenaline is yet to wear out, and he feels so drunk on you. he leans down in a daze, slotting his lips on yours and pushing his tongue into your mouth right away.Â
you moan into his mouth, gladly accepting his warm tongue with your own. he pulls you onto his lap, resting his hands on your ass and squeezing them through your thin sweatpants. you tug on his hair, earning a groan from him before feeling up his muscles. mingyu shivers when you caress his back. then you rub his biceps, feeling the hard muscles before settling on his pecs.Â
he yelps when you pinch his nipple, breaking the kiss. you donât give him time to think, pushing him back on the couch and removing his shirt. he breathes shakily as you palm his chest and thumb his nipples. a pathetic whine erupts from his throat when you kiss down his jaw, sucking on his tan skin.Â
you lick up a stripe on the column of his throat, and his hips buckle up, pushing his needy cock into your warm, clothed cunt. you nip at his sensitive skin, leaving behind patches of wet saliva as you descend down. mingyu grips your ass, pushing your hips down as he grinds his hard cock against your core.Â
you finally reach his pecs, littering kisses all over them but then he pulls you away, causing you to pout and whine. he matches your frustration, whining about his cock. âplease, i need to feel you.â you huff, discarding your pants hastily and he does the same. you stop him when he tries to take off his boxers and he looks at you confusedly.Â
confusion turns into neediness when your hands wrap around his cock, freeing it, but you leave the boxers on. his veiny, hard cock rests heavily in your hands as you push aside underwear, guiding his cock inside it. but you donât let him inside you, instead resting his cock against your cunt, and the thin material of your panty is stretched by cock. he moans, feeling the cloth pressed against his aching tip. his eyes roll back, feeling your arousal coat the underside of his dick when you grind against him.Â
you resume where you left off, sucking hickies on his pecs. mingyu lets you take charge, lazily grinding against your wet cunt. his mind goes blank, and his nerves fire up with the need to be inside you. your warmth is driving him crazy, and he can only whine as you move against him, his tip stimulated by the material of your panties.Â
mingyu moans loudly when you wrap your lips around his nipples. your tongue flicks at the hardening bud, sucking hard on it. your hand plays with his other nipple, pinching and probing at it. the sensation throws him off the edge, and he completely loses it. whining, he moves his hips at a faster pace. you release his nipple with a wet pop, only to suck on the other.Â
your wetness coats most of the underside of his dick now, but youâre still dripping. you whine against his nipple as mingyu grinds faster, and your pussy throbs against his length. with a bite to his bud, you pull away, gripping his shoulders and grinding back against him.Â
he rests his head on your neck, biting down on your skin to stop his whining. but itâs fruitless as he humps you faster, feeling his orgasm building up. you tug on his hair, pulling his head back to kiss him. you lick into his mouth, kissing him deeper and grinding down harder.Â
he breaks when you bite his lower lip, immediately cumming with a loud groan. his large hands lock behind your back, pressing you down, which causes the material to stretch over his tip. the pearls of cum oozing out his slit gather at one spot before oozing out the cloth as well. you groan in unison at the lewd sight, and you rub the cum, spreading it and rubbing his sensitive tip.Â
pulling him out, you rest against his chest and sigh. feeling sated even though you didnât cum. he chuckles, and his chest reverberates at the action, causing you to look up at him with a smile. âwhat?â you kiss the corner of his lips.Â
âno wonder youâve been ogling my tits for the past few weeks. you couldâve just asked, yâk?â he smirks, brushing his knuckles against your cheek, and you flush. so, he did notice. your cunt throbs again, and you gulp, feeling shy under his gaze. like you didnât just suck his tits.Â
âcaught you red-handed?â he brushes his lips against yours, one hand resting at the base of your neck and the other caressing your hips. you pinch your eyes shut, hiding in his chest, and he chuckles again. âi donât mind, baby. you can be loud about your fantasies.â
he drums his fingers on your ass, humming, and you practically feel his smirk. cocky bastard. you huff, opening your mouth to make a sassy comment, but instead, you yelp when he moves under you quickly. he lays on the couch and repositions you over his face.Â
you gasp, feeling his warm breath hit your wet cunt. he presses a kiss over your panties, and you have to grip the couch to not lose balance and end up suffocating him. âyou fulfilled your wishes. now itâs time for mine.â he whispers against your core, smirking up at you.Â
his wish? having you suffocate him with your cunt as he laps at your juices. (and thatâs the only thing that has been running through his mind, watching you work out in the damn spandex pants.)
tags; @seungkwanschicken @aaa-sia
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